#I was too shocked to say anything

[wyrddogs]

Along the same lines of people Making Choices on how to comport themselves around dogs, recently a woman at a dog event asked me for breeder recs, telling me she wanted to get into bitesports.

I was like, sure, here are the usual suspects, blah blah blah, and she asked if she could pet Zaku. I said yes and she immediately leaned over and put her face right next to his to encourage kisses.

Right next to the face of a dog she doesn't know, of a breed specifically selected to bite humans.

So she's going to need to learn better canine management if she wants to continue down this path.

[egophiliac]

CROWLEY SSR THOUGHTS

there is zero basis for this, but I can't get this thought of my head

I don't know why I decided to draw it this way

[izzystizzys]

There is a scratch mark on the floor of the Council chambers that Mace has never noticed before. Not a deep one, mind, quite shallow. This matters because it’s making the white-hot pulse of agony stabbing through his eyeballs ebb momentarily. Then, he chances a glance upwards at the fidgeting Knight in front of them, and it returns in full force.

Huh, he’s never seen Oppo Rancisis’ face turn that colour before.

“Hmm”, Master Yoda hums, deep and scratchy. His expression is unreadable even to Mace beyond a baseline gremlinness, and the force with which he grips the edges of his seat is making his bones creak. Master of the Order you should become, they said. Follow the calling of the Force, you should. A fulfilling purpose, it will be. Mace is going to hunt the little goblin for sport when this is all over, and he’s going to laugh the whole time.

“Show us the livestream again, could you, Knight Parvo?” Yoda asks. Mace bursts a capillary, he’s pretty sure, and so does poor Knight Parvo, whose orange Mon Cala skin tips all the way into blood red with stress. “Most unusual, this is.”

“Absolutely not!”, Ki Adi intervenes before Mace has to, thank the Force for little mercies. Plo Koon’s tusks tremble slightly with either suppressed laughter or abject horror, maybe both, and Stass Allie has her head in her hands. “The holo stills should be enough”, Ki Adi proceeds to add, and Mace has to reconsider all feelings of grace he just felt towards his fellow Councillor.

He never wants to watch Yoda zoom in on someone’s abs again. Or Depa raise her eyebrows at the curve of thighs bent over the dripping front of a speeder.

“Speeder Wash For Our Troops”, his former padawan reads out loud from a still of what has to be hundreds of the things gathered in the public senate parking lot. “Fund Our Boys And Get A Wet Seeing-To!” The series of images features dozens of Coruscant Guard troopers in various stages of unkitted, gleaming and shining with soap suds and water. The fact that the whole thing is also massive shatterpoint after massive shatterpoint is, quite frankly, insulting.

“Well hello- oh dear”, Obi-Wan’s blue form crackles to life in his chair, followed by several sounds of choking that are definitely not him. Good, Mace thinks acidly. If he has to deal with this, then so does kriffing Skywalker. “I’m sorry, why am I looking at Commander Thorn using a washrag like a lasso on top of a speeder?”

“Oh, the Guard’s little fundraising project”, Bail Organa says, as he steps into the Council chambers. Normally, Mace likes the man well enough. Now, he just smiles and adds on, “I’ve already donated, in mine and Breha’s name. Remotely, of course.”

“The Guard’s fundraising speeder wash?”, Obi-Wan repeats, edges of his holo form flickering with what Mace suspects is Skywalker very unsubtly trying to edge in. Force, but the man really is horrible at any and all stealth, like kissing his secret wife in an open arena in front of his Master. “And they are fundraising for…?”

“GAR budget allocations have to come from somewhere”, Organa shrugs. “And with the tide of public opinion turning, they’ve been tending towards cuts. The Guard feels them more keenly than any other sector - they’ve been reduced from half to quarter rations, and medical supplies have not made more than a token appearance in the last draft. The Chancellor has cancelled three consecutive meetings on the matter, and thus it was agreed that a more hands-on approach was needed. Any surplus will go into the Army fund.”

“Surely it can’t be that dire”, Oppo protests, a slightly less concerning shade of purple now. Senator Organa shrugs again, jostling the smattering of cracks slowly building around his person in a way that makes Mace wince quietly. “It’s all publicly available data, Masters.”

It really can be that dire, as it turns out. And quarter rations is only scratching the surface of how dire, considering the Guard has apparently never had access to bacta in all their posting, and also includes requisitioning forms available to the Senate for reconditionings and decommissionings, two words Mace has only heard Ponds whispers amidst shuddering in the early days of the war before Shaak Ti went off and just about tore some throats out over it.

“Alright”, he concedes, rubbing at his temples. “Fair enough, we have failed to tackle a massive blind spot in the Guard’s well being. There is no Jedi assigned to Coruscant, and that’s an oversight on our behalf. But how in the everloving kriff did this get past the Chancellor and Commander Fox?!”

Who have both signed, black on white. Bail Organa smiles cryptically. “Well, if you scroll a bit past that one image, up to the industrial speeder in the back - Commander Fox is currently having credits stuffed into his codpiece in the back, I believe.”

“HE’S WHAT IN THE WHAT NOW”, Commander Cody screeches through the speaker of Obi-Wan’s holo image, and Mace has to summon every bit of Jedi-serenity he possesses in his body to keep from dropkicking a cackling Yoda through the chamber windows.

[archangeldyke-all]

Reader just straight up not comprehending that Sevika is scary? Like when people talk about how intimidating Sevika is and Reader is just like “Uhm, what do you mean?? That’s my Sevi-bear?? She’s precious.” Pffft

-🥨

I LOVE THIS

men and minors dni

out of all the people in silco's little gang, you never understood why people thought sevika was scariest.

silco is scary. the man never raises his voice, doesn't bat an eye when he orders someone's death, and seemingly feels no remorse about anything... ever. he could blow over in a strong wind, but somehow, through sliminess alone, he's come to rule the entire undercity. that's scary.

lock is scary. just the pure physical size of him is intimidating enough, but add onto that the scars, prison tattoos, and the added strength of shimmer-- the man looks more like a killing machine than a human sometimes.

ran freaks you the fuck out-- they're quiet as fuck on their feet, and they've never missed a target-- sometimes, you think you see them in the shadows of your apartment at night.

but sevika?! sevika's not scary.

sevika's a fucking grandpa.

sevika's happiest when she's gambling with her boys, a cigarette in her mouth, you in her lap.

sevika loves to read but always falls asleep a chapter or two in, snoring as her book falls closed in her hands.

sevika can't be left alone around a freshly baked sweet treat-- or she'll eat the entire thing in one sitting.

sevika's not scary.

"you're married to sevika!?" a goon asks one evening while you wait for her to wrap up her work.

you blink at the man in front of you, trying to place him. he must be a new hire. "why is that surprising to you?" you ask.

"you seem so normal, and sevika's scary!" he squawks. you huff and roll your eyes.

"have you ever tried to get to know her? or do you just let the eyeliner and mech arm scare you off?" you ask. the man ties to speak, but a flash of anger sparks up in you. "you know, i bet you wouldn't be saying this if sevika was a man. why is sevika scary? 'cause she's a woman with power-- that's why." you're ranting now, defensive of your wife and getting worked up.

"no, that's not--"

"baby!" sevika's sweet voice calls. your little argument is completely forgotten as you turn around to greet your wife with a dreamy sigh.

"sevi-bear." you coo, pulling sevika in for a hug. she nuzzles against your throat, humming happily as you comb your fingers through her hair. "let's get outta here baby. made some brownies for you-- they're cooling off at home."

"fuck. i love you so much."

the pair of you leave the bar, tangled in each other's arms, none the wiser to the flabbergasted goon you left behind.

(sevika had threatened to tie a noose around his balls and let him dangle from the rafters earlier today when he'd joked about cheating at a game of cards.)

(now he's questioning his sanity, because the same woman who made him shit his pants in fear at lunchtime is giggling and covering her very defensive, slightly delusional wife in smooches as you two leave the bar hand in hand.)

taglist!

@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner

@shimtarofstupidity @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther

@ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai

@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @k3n-dyll @sevsdollette

@ellieslob @xayn-xd @keikuahh @maneskinwh0re @raphaellearp

@iamastar @sevikitty @claude999 @nhaaauyen

[moeblob]

You literally spent three hours having an ENTIRE SCHOOL (teachers included) slut-shaming a guy just for him to be a (spoiler).

[doedipus]

Guilty gear fandom misogyny is so incredibly frustrating

Like you can pick any boy out of the roster and the entire fanbase is probably falling over themselves to hype them up; people pop off for their associated players' gameplay, they construct elaborate fan media that brings out the intricacies of the characters and shows off their best points, and won't take no for an answer if someone claims to not find them maddeningly attractive

But then with the girls, at best nobody cares about them besides the dedicated superfans, and at worst literally every other player only speaks the character's name to complain. They'll get nothing but vapid pinup fanart with no regard for character, if they're even on the radar at all. Whenever one of the female characters gets a buff or a player makes a good tournament run, everyone stops what they're doing to complain for a month, until they go back to largely ignoring them again. And then whenever a patch brings a new boy people convince themselves is cool, or gives an existing one significant buffs, half the players on a female character drop her to switch. It's like clockwork.

Also for some reason every male character has people headcanoning them as trans in both directions, regardless of anything about their actual characterization, but none of the not-canonically-transfem girls really get that kind of fan attention, which is disappointing. Except that one artist who thinks elphelt should be transmasc.

I think the only guilty gear girl to escape this is Bridget, by dint of being a little sweetie pie. But she's still like a purely auxiliary character to the canon, so there's not a ton to talk about besides decade old discourse, and she's underdeveloped at a top level, with the only notable reps being players who use her to try and scam opponents out of a few games before switching to their real mains once they drop one themselves. Like despite her popularity among casual fans there's still no daru for Bridget

And honorable mention to season 2 baiken, who attracted a lot of upper level players who were unsatisfied with their mains at the time, who then nearly unanimously dropped her for John or sin in S3 when it became apparent that it wasn't as easy to win with her as they initially thought

[dizzybevvie]

RIP Bubba Sawyer you wouldve loved estrogen

[nostalgia-tblr]

"are people not into that?" i ask, after posting my weird niche shit to the internet, despite knowing it to be weird niche shit.

[bunnieswithknives]

sorry if idk this but what do you think about Wordgirl now in 2024 do you still like it do you still want to make art or talk about it or are you just done with all of it forever and plus i seen that you haven't made art of it since 2022 so you just done with all of it oh yeah and what about The Magnus Archives + Wordgirl ao3 fic too like is that just going to be and i know that your working on 2 au's now just wanting to know that's all

My interests tend to come in intense bursts and then fade. Unless something like, big happens like it gets a reboot its unlikely I'll be coming back to it anytime soon. As for the fic I don't have any current plans to finish it unfortunately.

[seaofreverie]

GUUUYYUYSSSD !!!!!

‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

KIMONO MY HOUSE VINYL!!!!!!

Also funny story which is that when my brother took these to the cashier he said something like "oh... Sparks... they were here one year ago"

[synthshenanigans]

What do you mean its been a month since the last power hour???

Time shouldnt work that way????

[dazais-guardian-angel]

kinda wild to me that one of the most compelling aspects of both Chuuya and Kunikida's characters to me, that I never really see talked about, is how they're heavily set on a doomed crash course towards complete and utter destruction, and how I am so, so worried for them both.....

[harbingersecho]

six fanarts thing - ty to everyone who gave me the chs!!

[benetnvsch]

Hey… imagine Kunikida reuniting with rozuko,,,

[bastiodon8]

mom said it was my turn to fuck up the canon and make my own seperate continuity.

anyways this is courtney (sometimes) and it sucks. get it's ass.

[litchi-tea]

I don't know why I thought Jordan wouldn't notice, but he actually gets happy that's so cute 😭💖💖