#I was once 16 on here too
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the funny thing about tumblr is that sometimes 16 year olds will get on here and tell you with the confidence of a thousand suns that you are the worst person in the world and you should kill yourself….babe have you heard of ISIS??
#I know I know#I was once 16 on here too#I swear your frontal lobe will develop#and you’ll look back on this#inspired by the r/ao3 post about antis today lol#self reflection is great#we all do and say dumb shit#shipping#fandom#tumblr#discourse
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What is happening?
#ordering here is cos dee first and last..#very interesting#iasip#chardee macdennis#compilation#sunnyisms#its funny frank has only ever said it ONCE#but they all seem to have their seasons (charlie 10. den 15. dee 16)#dennis has the most with 11 uses#i made gifs for the one off characters too but it kinda messed with the flow of the gif set imo#also like 24 gifs is already a lot#i tried to figure a way to combine some of these but my computer started whimpering so i noped out#oc
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Since you have been torturing us (and yourself) for aprill fools ,I bring a request from the people (me), asking if you can bless us with pepper jack angst🙏😔
Careful what you wish for
You just might get it
#cookie run kingdom#burningcheese#goldenspice#pepper jack cookie#here's Teenage Pepper Jack's debut lol. he doesn't look all that different. just taller and a new belt lol#he doesn't seem to be having a good time does he#he hadn't been 16 for very long before this happened. late and not so great birthday present...#burning spice cookie#golden cheese cookie#decided to add those just because i want more people to see this because I'm proud of myself for once lol#meant to remark that I'm probably changing the collar design to this. like GC's. the other one wasn't quite working ykwim#maybe it's just my amateurish skills but i could never get it to look quite right. plus this collar actually is a little cooler#pointy parts look like sunbeams coming out of the head. which is probably the point lol#jack is supposed to be associated with the sun too. so he gets his mom's sun collar. just in different colors ig#someday I'll be a good artist lol
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I’m thinking about it, and I think Optimus banishing Megatron from Iacon with the High Guard was probably one of the worst decisions he could have made to deal with this situation
Because Optimus pretty much left him alone, outside of his home and I’m fairly certain the only remaining city on Cybertron, so to live out in the wilds of the surface, with a bunch of complete strangers whom they literally call nut-jobs and have a strong belief of “strength of one bot over another”, and are also much older and more experienced than him
And in leaving him with the High Guard, he’s likely isolated Megatron even more than if he was banished alone. Because while Optimus and the others have friends they can be vulnerable with and be comfortable talk about their feelings, Megatron does not know these people, and they don’t know him. But he’s now their leader in a group that values strength above all else, and emotions are usually considered a weakness in these sorts of settings. So not only does he have no one to talk to, he has to bottle up his very strong and raw emotions to appear stronger and worthy of his position, thus making them far worse and probably leading to unhealthy coping mechanisms
This could end up not being the case, and the High Guard are very considerate of his emotions. But it’s also very possible the case that they aren’t, or Megatron believes he can’t be vulnerable around them. They (the quartet I mean) don’t know these people, and they’ve really only seen them be violent and aggressive, and Megatron knows he’s an outsider to them. It’s a more likely scenario that they’ll be harmful to Megatron’s mental state rather than helpful
And again, they’re a lot older than him too, and they probably all know this, at least on some level. And thus, he’s far more likely to be influenced by the High Guard’s mentality and beliefs, which we already know aren’t great (even if it’s somewhat justified why they’re the way they are by this point). And assuming they’re pissed at Optimus as well, they could very well try to have Megatron distance himself from his old friends, and it be more successful than if he was alone
But moving away from the High Guard, there’s the fact that Optimus banished him from his home and left him to fend for himself, which Megatron would absolutely take personally just on its own. He was clearly not in a mentally stable place at that point and I think he thinks what he’s doing is right, he’s the one not being like Sentinel while Optimus is. It definitely isn’t right, but he thinks he is. And the banishment to him could not only be Optimus/Orion standing against him, but essentially him saying he’s given up on Megatron, making him leave his home. And I mean, Sentinel did kind of do this to the High Guard 50 cycles ago, so yet another parallel to be made between Optimus and Sentinel
But note that when I say all this, I don’t mean it as a criticism of the movie, that this is a flaw of the plot. I’m fairly certain this was 100% intentional by the writers. It wasn’t just Megatron that created Megatron and led to the war, it was Optimus too, even if he didn’t intend to
Optimus probably thought at the time that this was the best solution in dealing with him. He doesn’t agree with Megatron’s actions but he understands where it all comes from, and he was someone very important to him. So he probably doesn’t want to arrest him, punishing him for what he thought was right and making himself more like Sentinel, oppressing those who were supposed to be on his side. But he still has to be punished for his actions. So by banishment, he is punished while still being allowed to essentially be free, just not in Iacon, and maybe in turn he’ll see his wrongdoings and come back better. And even if the High Guard aren’t ideal, they did help Optimus and Elita rescue their friends, and maybe he thought at least with them he wouldn’t be alone in his thoughts. Also they agreed with Megatron’s ideals and probably shouldn’t be allowed to just roam free in Iacon, especially in this politically fragile state it is right now
But in doing so, Optimus essentially threw Megatron to the wolves and created the perfect environment for his anger and pain to fester and cause him to become more like the Megatron we know in the future
I’m not sure what the actual best solution would have been to this issue though. Maybe it would have been just jailing Megatron? Granted in the short term, it’d probably sting even worse for Megatron, that his own friend would lock him up, and it’d probably make him even more resentful. But at least there, he’d still be in Iacon, with his friends and people who want to help him, and with Optimus and Elita at the helm, they can probably see that he gets treated well and has access to people that can really help him work through it all and see what he did was wrong
But that’s not what happened
#just a thought I had earlier this morning#I really do hope this analysis of the situation was correct#I’m pretty sure what the writers were going for is that Megatron’s fall and the future fall of Cybertron was not just on him#it was ultimately both Optimus and Megatron’s fault#both making the wrong decisions and choices that they thought were right at the time#I’ve seen people bring this up with Orion and D-16 as well before The Fall#but I think it applies here too#and also despite me essentially defending Megatron here he was absolutely not in the right either#wanting to burn down everything and even attacking Optimus who actually has the Matrix and was brought back to life#not being a false Prime like Sentinel and once being his closest friend#but he was also in an emotionally volatile state at this point and having a mental crash out#and now having been encouraged in this mentality by the High Guard#also he wasn’t at all like this before the reveal of Sentinel’s betrayal#so it’s not like he’s an irredeemable monster at this state either#just someone who’s making the wrong decisions and needs help even if he doesn’t think he needs it#I don’t know I have a lot of thoughts on this#I should probably stop here so I don’t flood the tags with even more#transformers#transformers one#optimus prime#Megatron
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"So technically Grian can meet any version of himself through Xelqua !"
Xelqua becomes the YHS Grian and Grian has war flashbacks (idk I've never watched the series)
YHS isn't canon to EvoAU ! So Grian wouldn't know anything abt that.
Fun fact, even tho I don't include it, its where I got the parent/abandonment issues from.
Xelqua has definitely seen this version (i haven't seen YHS since i was 16, i don't remember it well ^____^ )
#ask#my brain has been pulling me to rewatch it for three days now im itching.#IF im remembering correctly... YHS Grian's parents don't like him#if im not then well idk where i got it from LOL#hes also canonically gay in that series. like grian says hes into guys instead. i wonder what compelled this plot line for him#in my heart hes trans too bc he wears a shirt to the pool. real to me.#i was rly into yhs at 16 but only drew it once bc i was embarrassed abt liking minecraft at that age LMAO#and here i am. almost 25. revisiting. thriving.#I tried to find the drawing but i cannot. it was sam tho. so no loss rly. OOFAJDGKAG#my art#sketching#xelqua changing into valor grian like well actually im not telling you abt this one. moving on.
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Cid!! He just looks so good in black
#my art#ffxvi#cidolfus telamon#ff16#final fantasy 16#cid the outlaw#he may look too dapper for an outlaw here but#I just want him to look NICE for once#his outfit is one of my least favorites for the main characters#so I took matters into my own hands as usual
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hey. everyone. do you remember the pandemic? remember the year and half, two years, still ongoing for many? the worldwide horrific illness with lasting effects on everyone's psyche's and a great tragic many's physical health, forever? it happened like, oh, five years ago now? remember that guys?
#i was very lucky my family was VERY luck#but i'm just thinking and having my millionth 'hey wait the pandemic fucked me up' moment#IT HAS BEEN FIVE YEARS. FIRST OF ALL. SECOND OF ALL I DON'T REMEMBER BEING 14 OR 15 OR 16.#i was a fresh 14 year old and then i was 17. i remember a few months of being obsessed with the magnus archives and other podcasts.#i don't remember playing my instrument except that i felt like i stagnated incredibly. and i did.#and now i have a new thing to be mad at because my first year in a real orchestra doesn't count because it was fucking online.#i auditioned on zoom. we just had weekly zooms. once a week play for a guy on my dad's phone. and he had to get to everyone else#so it's not like he could really help any of us that much.#and it's not worth thinking about but i'm letting myself think about it a bit what the hell. I NEVER REALIZED ANY OF THIS SHIT BEFORE.#many of the people i go to school with now had infinitely more resources than i did by virtue of going to established magnet music schools#or having musicians in the family. so while we all fucking had a rough time educationally#they had institutions and family behind them.#i'm just a little bit more mad about that. another thing to stupidly irrationally think 'that's not fair' about#it's not fair but it's not about fair and right now it doesn't matter anymore#i'm here just like them and i earned it and i earn it every day.#one day i'll figure out how to stop vaguely hating everyone just a little bit. one day i'll figure out how to be a better person.#i'm trying. but this is the first time i realized this today so i'm letting myself be a little bit mad#without hating myself for it too much#bluebird.txt#would i have felt like an untrained dog like a failure of a human being if i had gotten to have those two years of high school?#i don't think so because my parents are the way they are and somehow i am their child that is the most but also the least like them#and i don't always like it.#i don't think it would've been different. but i will never ever know.#no one will.#sorry chat i just had a huge realization about the course of my life 👍🏼
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Are you really 24? you look older but in a good way
I promise I was born in the year 2000
#ive only been 24 for like three months too#but people have thought im older for most of my life#used to get asked what i did for work and id say “im in school”#and theyd say “oh grad school? whats your field??” and id say “no im in high school. im 16”#this legitimately happened more than once#bitts answers#anyway why would i lie about my age on here
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the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now
#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL#really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us#ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great#extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore#the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog#its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow#i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating#i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one#i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it#theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget#anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by#there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad#cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now#maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that#im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away#ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free#i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20#i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her#but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more#maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know#because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before#i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years#i dunno. i dont know#anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process#the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months#the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time#when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move#just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend
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you guys I'm not even through the first episode and I have doubts about whether or not I can do this. I managed with Summer Strike but I don't think I can with this one. it is very hard to watch a drama when you feel like you're going to pass out every time the main character shows up, and they're bound to show up often, since they're one of the main characters
#once again on my some people are just too handsome and ought to consider the general public and not go into acting nonsense again#y'all i had to see im siwan's face on my screen for 12 episodes do you THINK i can handle 16 more???? good grief#deeply horrified at the state of things and also deeply mortified at my own involuntary reaction#though i won't lie this DOES happen in real life too. i do generally avert my eyes if i see someone outrageously attractive#that's neither here nor there though#songbird's romcom romp of '24
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my classes start again 3 weeks from today
#michelle speaks#the thing is that. i have 3 classes + an externship which is 16 hrs a week + i will be on a journal 😭#which is all so much & i like to do nothing all the time this is not conducive to my ideal lifestyle 😔#i did not even have to do the journal at all either but i was like no for once i am going to do an extracurricular & this is one u commit#to so if you join u have to do it so for me that is good bc i will then actually do it instead of being like u know what. nvm!#& then i sit here & think to myself abt how i should not have decided to go into a social profession & i should have picked smth#where i could unironically not in a cottagecore type way disappear into the woods & not interact w anyone#not in a yay i’m frolicking in the woods w my forest aesthetic thing but like i can be alone in peace type way#instead no. i was like no i will do smth where i have to interact w ppl constantly & do things i dont want to & leave my apartment 😭#is it too much to want to be a hermit that dies in my log cabin & no one ever discovers me so i am entombed in my nice little home……like?
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This rep’s math was WAY off. He asked for 48 copies of 16 different posters thinking it was 288 copies. My guy I’m in printer hell that’s 768 copies you dipshit
#I have been printing for HOURS#I started at 9am#I made it through 9/16 on Friday but WOOF#he’s my least favorite sales rep and a massive dick so I love point out when he’s an idiot#I can’t help it 🤧 he was so rotten to me when I started working here#he screamed at my coworker once too#you can’t be rude AND stupid#my stupid job#graphic design
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Ughhhhhhh I hate writing and I hate not writing and I hate myself
#nearly bought a digital typewriter today. actually i DID buy a digital typewriter today. officially yes i have bought a digital typewriter.#the money for the digital typewriter has left my account but i have emailed them to cancel the order because i can't in good faith buy#a digital typewriter when i don't fucking WRITE#i thought it might help me get back into it. distraction free and while allowing me to not judge my own writing#and be continuously editing while i write and going 'i'm crap i'm crap i'm crap no one will ever read this and if they do they will think#that i'm garbage and that i should feel bad etc etc etc'#but it's too expensive and i have the feeling i wouldn't even like or use the thing once i got it#because the IDEAS! the ideas aren't coming to me. or rather they are but none of them seem to stick#i feel underconfident in writing any of them#and then i have old projects that i've always wanted to get back to like the tennis romance thing but SO much has changed since i first#started drafting it. like i don't even know if i like the main couple anymore. i kind of want to put both of them with different OCs of min#but it'd switch up the WHOLE story if i had a different cast#in fact most of the problem lies in the fact that i have this long-running bedtime story i tell myself every night with lore#and a massive cast of characters that i switch out depending on who i'm most interested in right now and every so often i incorporate new#themes and ideas and motifs and plot points sometimes based on media i've been watching because it's MY bedtime story and it doesn't matter#if i plagiarise in my own brain. but then obviously i can't plagiarise in real life#and none of my bedtime stories are GOING anywhere. sometimes i only get through a scene or two before i fall asleep#all of which means my bedtime story is not so much a sweeping epic novel but a sitcom with way too many characters#most of which are werewolves to be honest and sometimes for my own wish fulfilment one of them will walk out of my head#and take care of my problems for me by lending me £1million or murdering my best friend's ex. in my mind obviously#so it's like. it's a case of getting in there and annexing off the stuff i think i can use#it's like yeah i've definitely written several romance novels in my head in the process of this but does it matter if they're IN my HEAD#to be honest i feel like my main strength is in creating characters. like i have this one family of werewolves i've been slowly but surely#adding members to since i was like 16. maybe younger? no yeah i think i made the first one when i was 12#they're compelling to ME anyway. i care about them. it's just PLOTS. i can't plot#if a book could just be a lot of dialogue and sex scenes and silly moments and character studies i'd be alright#i also can't describe settings. don't ask me to because i can't#and now i'm just annoyed with myself because i sat down at my laptop to try to write and instead i'm here complaining about how i don't wri#and if i had the digital typewriter... i mean i'd probably still be doing this i'd just no longer have £300#i don't have the £300 anyway. i hope to christ they refund my card i'm a fucking idiot
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The obsession people in a relationship have to get their single relatives/friends into one too
#even those who swear they’d be different tend to turn into the dark side once they get with someone#anyone but not you?? you traitor#my sister wants to set me up with her boyfriend’s best friend like wtf#she said it many times already leave me alone#I said ‘who says I’d want a bf anyway’ but didn’t only mean it in the ‘I’m happily single’ way it was in the wlw way as well#but she’s not supposed to know the latter#my friend who’s in her 30s always tells me her married friends do that to her all the time too and it annoys her#and I’ve had that many times too since what since I’ve turned 16 I think#truly from the bottom of my heart : stfu#and I know I may sound desperate at times here but irl I not like that
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Finally took an appointment to the employment Center my social worker told me to go to for help finding a job that won’t make want to kill myself 😭 jcjchjgfg
#it’s for young people (16-35yo) to help getting back to work or school#it’s Thursday and I see my SW Friday so it’s good I’ll have something to talk about and not look like a loser that can even make a phone#call* 😭 nchfvjg#she told me to see another place too but it dosen’t fit my needs#i just want a job that won’t need me to be in public too much :(#cause once I talk to someone I’m not really shy anymore#anyway I hope I do find something cause my mom is at a point she dosen’t even know if she can buy food for the week if she has puppy’s pills#to pay 😭#and my dad pay for so much too he can’t help#I also need a new phone this one drives my crazy… also I pay way too much where I am#I could have a new phone for the same price I pay right now just for the plan….#but it’s all under my dad’s name so I can’t call to cancel my plan he has to 🤪#but anyway I’ve been playing animal crossing non stop I’m sorry if I’m not here a lot just know I’m doing fine !!!#I’ll be back soon when I’ll stop being obsess with my island I just want terraforming so bad but there’s so much to do to get there 😭 jcbdj#I’ll try to at least reblog what’s on my user tag later 🫶#ily all 🤍#alex.txt
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probably demotivating for anyone who sees this so just scroll
honestly thinking about just giving up
#i’ve been trying since i was 12#three years#i’m about to be 16 too#like i don’t know what to do anymore#shifting was so exciting back then#but now i’m so tired man#i just wanted to shift atleast once#but i haven’t even gotten any symptoms#everyday i wake back up here#and i’ve tried everything#affirmations#reprogramming my mind#multiple methods#and nothing#idk what i should do anymore#i also tried gateway tapes#meditations#everything#idk#reality shifting#shifting rant#i tried asking for help too but how can someone else help me for my journey? i tried asking tarot cards#pendulums i would ask my friend who’s experienced in tarot cards but i don’t wanna reveal that im a shifter to her#that’s just weird to me. she used to try and shift too but she stopped#it’s been years too i don’t think i should#here i am though asking for help again#shifting help#shifting vent#when is my turn#rant
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