#I was also starting to freak out over how often I’ve had to pee today but. 3-4 caffeinated beverages… and also anxious.

[shatterthefragments]

Either I took the picture at the calmest time or the whitecaps don’t show very well on camera or both bc. It was WINDY!

But I got some ocean time before I had to start going for the meeting tonight :)

Something something windswept existence pushing and retreating/follow it from the waves.

[binniedeactivated]

txt reactions. || 👾👾

I saw a national children’s day post earlier and got inspired so I’d like to bless ya’ll with some fluff!

(yes I included the maknaes,, even though they are still young I think they would make amazing fathers in the future🥺)

TXT finding out you’re pregnant ....

soobin; it was the same time around soobin’s birthday. you’d been getting so nauseous and sick the past couple of weeks and you had an idea of what was going on, you just weren’t sure. gathering up your courage you decide to buy a couple of tests from the drug store, trying to settle the issue once and for all. you’re heart sunk to the floor once the two small lines appeared on the mini screen. you checked the box a thousand times to make sure the two lines meant you were pregnant. you read it over again trying to make sure you weren’t losing your mind. but you weren’t. you were pregnant. you were kind of freaked out about it so you didn’t know how to tell soobin, in words especially. once he went off to work on songs and dances with the boys, you went out to the store and bought a small t shirt. a baby one that snapped cutely at the bottom. you bought a gift bag and some tissue paper and piled it to the top so soobin had no idea what he was in for. once soobin came home your palms immediately became sweaty. you tried your hardest not to show your nerves. “hey baby. you okay? how was your day today?”. he’d ask. “it was good. I still feel kind of sick though. I bought you something while i went out”. you’d say, shoving the bag in his chest. he’d grasp it smirking, “what’s this?”.  “it’s a shirt that kind of reminded me of you. I thought you’d like it”. you explain with your heart pounding. soobin throws layers and layers of tissue paper on the floor until he got to the very bottom of the bag. he clutches the t shirt and unfolds it in the air to get a better look at it. his eyes widened once he saw that it was a baby’s shirt that read, “I’ve got the best daddy ever”. 

“are you really-?”. he trailed off with his mouth agape. 

“yes soobin”.

soobin drops everything and hugs you, kissing you on your cheeks. “I love you and we got this alright? don’t be scared”. he was trying to be as affectionate as possible but he was jittering on the inside. a little soobin? oh he couldn’t wait.

yeonjun; yeonjun tried to be as patient as he could with you. he thought maybe you were on your period so that’s why you’ve been grumpy these past couple of weeks. the funny thing was, your period had already passed. you couldn’t explain the reasons for your emotions. they were just there and you had no control over them. you cried over every wrong thing yeonjun did. he bought you the wrong flavor ice cream, the wrong sized shoe, the wrong sized clothes. usually you’d shrug these types of things off so you couldn’t believe yourself when you actually began tearing up. you thought maybe you were going through an early menopause or something, you were quite terrified of what was happening to you. you went to the doctor’s office as soon as yeonjun was out of sight. you couldn’t believe your ears when the doctor told you that you were two months pregnant. you told him he had to be lying to you. but it was kind of hard to lie once he rubbed the aquasonic gel on your tummy and placed the probe against it. you saw a tiny being growing inside you on the screen. you also heard some weird sounds to which the doctor was telling you it was your baby’s heart beat. you could cry; as emotional as you were. 

your nerves were already wrecked and to make matters worse you didn’t know how you were going to tell yeonjun. he enters the house that night and you glare over at him. he immediately sighs, knowing you were going to cry over something stupid once again. “you know what babe? maybe we just need some time alone from each other”. he finalizes. “i don’t need time alone. why don’t you want to be with me? you’re supposed to be there for me through everything not just leave”. 

“I’m not leaving. but your attitude is really getting the best of you and I don’t want to lash out on you”. 

“then don’t”. 

“see? it’s smart remarks like that that pisses me off and you know that”. yeonjun snaps. you didn’t know why his attitude grew another type of anger inside you. you took the envelope from your lap and threw it at his head. 

“and now you’re throwing things?”. yeonjun complains while picking the envelope up off the floor. he was going to toss it to the side until he realized it was from the medical office and it had your name on it. “wait what is this?”.

he questions before opening it and sliding the folded ultrasound pictures out of the slot. once they were out for him to see all of them unfolded and he saw it with a full view. his eyes were as wide as moons and he pushes his lips together humming frantically. “baby! you serious?!”. it was kind of cute how his attitude had went away. you folded your arms. 

“two months”. yeonjun smiles and punches the air. “yes!! yes! you know what? I should tell the guys. nah first i’m going to tell my mom. or my grandma. as a matter of fact i’ll wait until we know the gender I hope it’s a boy. he’s going to be a sexy beast like his daddy. if it’s a girl she’ll be so spoiled i swear--”. 

yeonjun babbles, going on and on about his plans. you wanted to continue being angry. but your new soon to be father was just too cute for your eyes.

beomgyu; you knew already. from the constant peeing to the puking you knew what was up. beomgyu didn’t though so it was kind of hard to keep letting him cater to you day after day. he’d leave work early just to come home to you and make sure you were well fed and taken care of. he’d even stop by the store and pick up some medicine to help you feel better. whatever was wrong with you he hoped to god it wasn’t anything serious. more than anything else he loved spending time and having fun with you and it was kind of hard when you were sick like this. well at least, he thought you were sick. you were thankful for everything he was doing so there was no way you were going to keep this secret from him any longer. however you didn’t want to tell him with your own words. you decided to call yeonjun. “hello?”. he answers, “hey yeonjun i have to tell you something”.   “listen if beomgyu once again turned the washing machine on forgetting he had to put clothes in it, that was his own stupidity and i’m not in charge of controlling him”. 

you laugh, “what? no. that sounds like something he’d do. and it kind of worries me considering what I’m about to tell you”. 

“what is it?”. 

“I’m pregnant. alright? what I’m going to call for a delivery to the studio to surprise him. I want you to record everything. don’t tell him”. 

“holy shit he’s going to be a parent? god bless you”. you laugh again, “yeonjun record it!”. “I will”. he promises. 

beomgyu had been practicing really hard today. trying to get the moves correct before the soon to come show. all the members were against the wall on their phones or carrying on. they had the moves down already so there was no need for constant rehearsal for them. but for beomgyu this was the peak of his stress. he watches himself attentively in the mirror until a delivery guy walks in out of the blue. 

“delivery for Choi Beomgyu”, he informs, with a big box of diapers in his hand. beomgyu turns around confused. “diapers?”. the delivery guy nods and the members are on the wall staring with just as much confusion. all except for yeonjun who was recording like you’d ask. the guy hands beomgyu the box and he instantly shoots a look to the rest of the members. “quit trying to be funny. this was a weak joke”. 

“it wasn’t from us”. yeonjun smiles with his phone camera pointed at a frustrated gyu. “oh yeah? then whose it from?”. “your girlfriend”. beomgyu looks back at the box in his hands and think for a moment. “why would she send me a box of---”. and it was clear that his lightbulb had went off. he dropped the box and started jumping around like a lunatic. “babe! baby! is she on the phone with you yeonjun?! is that her?!!”. he screams while the rest of the members clap and laugh. “she told me to record your reaction”. 

“I’m going to be a fucking dad!! holy shit!!”. he screams to the top of his lungs.

taehyun; oh boy. it was a battle between you and taehyun. it was you trying to figure out how you were going to tell him that you were, versus him trying to figure out how he was going to tell you that he already knew. either way it goes, you both knew there was soon to be a little taehyun on board. you’d get all the symptoms, fatigue/exhaustion, cramping, peeing and vomiting. taehyun would do his research on how to comfort you better or how he typed it in his search bar, “how to comfort a pregnant woman”. for some reason taehyun was very knowledgeable on this type of thing. to taehyun it was easy. you were acting out of character way too often and it was often companioned by a stream of odd emotions that he couldn’t explain. something was definitely off about you and it wasn’t hard for him to know exactly what it was. he wouldn’t get angry at anything, he’d rather hold your hands and calmly tell you to relax and that things were going to be okay. he’d ask you if there was anything you wanted from him and if you wanted him to cook your favorite foods before he was off to work. you weren’t far along but you were feeling fat already. you felt yourself get kind of heavier and as a result you ached more than normal. taehyun would run you warm baths and compliment you often. you only let a couple more weeks pass by before you gained the courage. you woke up one saturday morning determined that he was going to know. but there was way too much noise in your house and before you did anything you had to know what it was. you painfully walked to where the noise was coming from and there was taehyun in a black sweat suit with his hat turned backwards. he was sweating and you were trying to figure out what he was doing. 

“taehyun? why are you making so much noise?”. 

“I’m moving things”. 

“for what?”. 

taehyun pushes the dresser in the hallway to the side. he pushes open the door that was behind it. once you saw the view you could just cry. he was turning one of the empty rooms inside your house into a nursery. He already started painting it grey and yellow and adding elephant teddies on the furniture. you held your heart in awe.

“taehy--”. 

“yes i know already”, he laughs. “you’re going to be such a good mommy”.

kai; you have been missing kai like crazy. and even more with your hormones raging now that you know you’re 3 months along.  you couldn’t believe that you guys were going to be parents. it was insane. kai, the chaotic and you, his sidekick? you didn’t know how this baby would turn out. maybe just as crazy as kai. maybe just as crazy as you. maybe a little bit of both. either way you didn’t mind. kai had been touring these past three months and it was especially hard for you receiving the news on your own. he’d face time you quite often and you had to try your best to be normal and to not let your emotions get the best of you. it would be another couple of weeks until he came back but you couldn’t wait any longer. the secret was eating you alive and you figured he had to know one of these days. you and taehyun had been working together to figure out a plan for the surprise. yes, you picked taehyun because you figured out of all the members he’d probably be more organized with this. 

and you were definitely right. it was late and the boys were performing in Kai’s hometown. Honolulu, Hawaii and what a better feeling was it to get this news while he already felt at home? After performing more than half of their newest album, The Dream Chapter: Eternity the boys were more than exhausted. But they couldn’t forget their end of show ritual of talking with MOAS and having a good time with them before they were back on the road. each of the boys gave a separate small speech about their love for moas and how they appreciated them. Taehyun however, assured MOAS that he loved them but he had an even better speech in mind, and that his was especially for kai. The lights in the stadium dimmed at taehyun’s command like he planned, and the giant screen behind them glowed a soft yellow color. There was baby footprints, and a poem that read, 

“Mommy told me your name was kai, so I wanted to tell daddy that I said Hi!”.

within an instant the members were screaming and jumping around along with moas. Kai was shocked. but he was so happy he’d be raising a child with you. he raised the microphone to say something but he couldn’t. his lip trembled and he immediately started crying out of pure joy. 

[the-fiction-witch]

Too Close For Comfort

REAL LIFE: SCANDAL COUPLE: TBS X READER RATING: FUNNY

"I'm already angry and bitter and we haven't even started yet" Thomas sighed as he and y/n sat at her dinning table

"You dick! I just pressed record" she laughs

"Well. That's in the video now." He sighed

"This is a great time to talk about someone we don't often chat about" she laughed "Sally!"

"Sally, Yeah everyone loves sally"

"Yeah, Sally. She is My wonderful beautiful editor, who edits all of my footage. we love her so much and she goes though everything, and sorts it all out, she goes though stuff where we have like sat for like two hours chatting about nothing" she explained "Sally is the one who delts with our shit so show her some love" she explained "Anyway! the video"

"what are we doing today y/n?"

"We are starting a challenge" she explained "Now if you've been on the internet for a while you are somewhat aware of this challenge, The challenge is that you got two people and a pair of" she smirked before dropping a pair of metal handcuffs on the table "Handcuffs."

"where did you get those?"

"sex shop"

"Oohh, why didn't you get those soft fluffy ones?" He asked "The pink ones?"

"Oh? how do you know about those then Thomas?"

"I have been in a sex shop in my life y/n. I've not bought anything but I have been in a sex shop"

"Okay Vanilla boy" she laughs "Have you ever been handcuffed before Thomas?"

"Uuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhh...... I uhhh. I don't want to admit that On camera"

"Come on Thomas more of your dirty laundry is going to be aired in this video come on" she says "Literally in some departments"

"I have. Before."

"Ooooohhhh Vanilla boy has been handcuffed before"

"One time! and it was the fluffy ones so they where way more comfy"

"but unfortunately we have just plain metal ones, Now most have seen this challenge before but we are extending it.  Instead of doing thing for twenty hour hours, we are doing it for 167 hours!"

"what?"

"We are doing it for a week!"

"A week!"

"Yes! I hadn't told Thomas about this until now so... its a surprise to everyone but me!"

"we're being handcuffed together for a week!"

"Yes we are!"

"I thought we where doing this for one day..."

"Nope"

"Oohh... I am going to do poorly at this"

"I love how you where so confident when you came over to film today and now you look so scared"

"I thought it was twenty four hours. I was okay with one day,"

"What are you scared off? what was fine for one day but isn't for any longer?"

"I was convicted it was one day and that I could just... basically sit and play switch and watch tv with you and then it would be fine, but a week? how are we gonna sleep? how are we going to bathe? how... how are we gonna go to the bathroom!"

"We are going to figure that out" she laughs "Yes so one week, handcuffed to each other. I think we'll be okay because we are very used to being around each other I think we're going to forget about it and then one of us is going to like get up to move and accidently drag the other one with them"

"I have... concerns"

"I know you do. Lets just hope I don't start my period this week"

"Ohh god! your not right?"

"I shouldn't... but it does like to randomly turn up for shits and giggles"

"I'm concerned about the bathroom, just every element in the bathroom"

"I've seen your dick before Thomas"

"Have you?"

"Yes I have. Many times"

"How?"

"You leave the bathroom door open when you use it?"

"Because I'm used to living alone where you don't need to shut bathroom doors"

"I'm worried about the bath ... I am not sure how we are going to like take our clothes off with handcuffs on,"

"Ohh thats a good point. I have no idea"

"I may just, not shave this week I'm kinda scared about trying to shave with you handcuffed to me, Plus I'm not sure I can actually go to the bathroom with you next to me"

"Well we are going to find out. Its a week Thomas you are gonna have to poop"

"You underestimate my ability to not shit y/n" he says "I have a meeting this week"

"what?"

"I have a meeting, With my agent this week"

"Ohh that's gonna be fun" she smirked "so, Are you ready? to be unable to leave me for one whole week"

"I guess physically I'm ready. Emotionally ... god fucking no I am not ready for this"

"I am prepared to give up my dominant hand for you Thomas, I am prepared to do that"

"Awww, Good because I wasn't prepared to do so for you"

"My logic was, if we have to go anywhere this week which I'm sure we will at some point you are going to need to drive."

"That's a good point actually. okay... Fuck it cuff me" He sighed holding out his arm, Y/n tightened it around his wrist and then around her own "Fuck I hate it so much and it's been ten seconds"

"Good. Because I need to pee"

"Why didn't you go before we locked them!"

"Because we both have to accept we ae handcuffed together for a week! we are going to have to pee in front of each other so might as well get it over with" she laughs "and now for the added element that I didn't want to mention until we where handcuffed!"

"Ohh fuck no, what now?"

"Jack, Thomas' lovely friend who I also adore is coming over in about ten minuets on his way to the airport"

"Okay..."

"He's going on holiday. and I am giving him the key to our handcuffs so we aren't cheating"

"Wait what!"

The doorbell then rang and y/n smirked "That'll be him now, Come on Thomas" Y/n laughs getting up and trying to tug Thomas along with her

Y/n began filming as she laid on the sofa with Thomas sat beside her playing switch the two still handcuffed

"so Jack left, about half an hour ago. I didn't film it becuase... Honestly I don't know but the key is gone, on its way to Italy so this is life for the next week. and Thomas is already being a moody bitch because he won't get up to let me go to the bathroom"

"How are we going to deal with sleeping?" He asked avoiding what she had said

"I don't know, I am going to assume that obviously we are going to have to share a bed."

"we going to sleep at yours or mine?"

"I don't know, I don't think it matters I mean its nextdoor Thomas"

"You have bunnies to look after so I assume we're mostly going to be here?"

"I think so. We are going to need to go to your meeting, and I imagine we are going to have to go to the shops at some point... for milk"

"what do you want for dinner anyway?"

"I have no idea. I'm kinda worried about us cooking tonight because we are not used to these yet and I think someone will get hurt or we will murder each other. But... I don't want to order a take away because one the driver might see our cuffs and be like. The fuck. and also do we want fast food because if it gives one of us a poor tummy then... that's going to be a whole thing"

"Yeah I see your point. wanna do like frozen chicken nuggets or something then?"

"Yeah that's sounds good. that sounds like its not going to make one of us need to shit in the middle of the night."

"Ohh fuck I've just thought about that. what if I need to pee and your asleep"

"I think you're going to need to wake me Thomas. that or drag my unconscious body to the bathroom with you"

"Can I pee in a bottle?"

"No!" she complained "This so far is kinda easy because we aren't doing anything, but I worry for the rest of this week"

"You should do the thing now"

"The thing?" she asked "Ohh right, for safety I do have another key to these handcuffs. the main key obviously has gone to Italy with Jack but I do still have one here. but its for absolute emergency and I don't mean like need the bathroom or freak outs. I mean one of us needs to go to the hospital type of Emergency"

"I may break my leg, just to get the key to get out of this by the end o this week"

"You might. maybe you'll go full 127 hours and chew your own arm off"

"I will admit I have been pondering the concept"

Y/n sat on a bed cuddling both her bunnies Thomas sat beside her looking annoyed

"We forgot to film." she smiled "Give them the information Thomas"

"We both went to the bathroom. which was... weird"

"Its not that weird. I think we are very used to the other just being like the other side of the door anyway so that if we keep talking while using the bathroom its not that bad you can kinda forget that your handcuffed"

"Yeah, However neither of us have took a shit yet."

"That's true." she says "we are in the spare bed, so we can be close to the bunnies and they can cuddle with us tonight, which I have to admit the more I think about it the more it seams like a bad idea, I just though it would be better then having you trying to fall asleep in my bed"

"I am a little worried about you moving around, and the bunnies moving around. Mostly I'm worried about jellybean trying to hump me"

"He likes to hump you"

"he does. Clearly I'm attractive"

"shut up Thomas" she says "we did take our cuffs off briefly. Because I realized we can't take our clothes off to get into bed because our clothes stay on the cuffs so we literally just took them off to take the clothes off and then handcuffed again. so that's the one rule I'm adding that we can take our clothes off with it because lets be real we are doing this for a week we have to change clothes at some point"

"Yeah it was just horrendously impossible. so that's the rule we can use it to take our clothes off and all"

"Right, come on bunnies off to bed" she told them and pushing them off the bed "Right so I guess we are going to sleep together now, We'll see you in the morning everyone or in the middle of the night depending on when we need the bathroom" she smiled waving to the camera Thomas waved too and the light went out "Goodnight Thomas"

"Goodnight y/n"

Then a rather sudden cut away not as if the camera was turned off more as if the editor had quickly cut something the moment he spoke.

[honeypiehotchner]

Beautiful Stranger (Chris Evans x OFC) -- part eleven

This is a very cute and special part ;)

Warnings: none! Unless you count the fluff content in here to be illegal.

Chris -- despite my protests, because what if people are watching? Or have cameras out? -- holds my hand as we walk back to my car. He opens the door for me, or tries to, but pouts when I laugh at him because I haven’t unlocked my car yet.

“Sorry, you’re trying to be nice and I’m being an ass,” I say, but that doesn’t stop me from continuing to laugh. I do unlock the car, though, and he smiles brightly -- like a child, I swear -- when he gets to open my door.

“M’Lady,” he bows his head and gestures into the driver’s seat.

I roll my eyes, but that’s because I’m trying to get rid of the wild butterflies in my stomach.

“Thank you for lunch,” he says once we’re driving back to my office.

“Thank you for letting me pay this time,” I tease. “And for surprising me, of course.”

He grins. “I’ll do it more often.”

“Please,” I say without thinking, and then immediately reel back. “I mean, if you’re not busy filming. You need to finish filming first.”

“But I also need to eat,” he counters, leaning his elbow on the side of the door. “So I think they’ll be okay if I ask to have lunch at this time every day.”

“Chris…” I shake my head in warning, starting my car. “I feel like I am way more conscious of cameras than you are.”

“I’ve gotten used to it,” he shrugs. “But I should be more careful, I know.”

“Your publicist already give you the speech?”

“Well, she forced me to tell her about you.”

I stay quiet and drive, hoping he’ll give more context. But he doesn’t, so I have to say, “What?”

And he continues. “She asked why it was-- Okay, normally -- I won’t lie -- normally after a few days of staying in, I’m calling her and telling her the guys and I are going out and that I’m apologizing in advance for anything she’ll have to yell at me for in the morning.”

“Is it that bad?”

“No, it’s not,” he chuckles. “But the media gets ahold of something and then it is. But point is, she caught me out. She asked why I hadn’t been going out at all yet and asked what the hell I had been doing-- She’s like my mother sometimes, I swear.”

“It sounds like it.”

“But she asked me that,” he shrugs his shoulders for emphasis, “and I can’t lie and say I’ve just been staying in for no reason because she knows me better than that, so I had to tell her.”

I grip the steering wheel tightly to relieve some nerves. “What did she say?”

He lets out a breathy laugh. “As my friend, she’s over the moon. As my publicist, she said she’s going to start doing damage control now.”

“Now?” I ask, raising my eyebrows. “Your name hasn't been anywhere.”

“Not yet,” he reminds me. “It’ll happen soon, and I’m sorry for when it does.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“No, but it’s something I wish you never had to deal with.”

“Well,” I pause, turning my blinker on. “It’s been a month and so far, so good.”

“That’s because we’ve been in my apartment,” he replies, laughing but he sounds wary. “I know I’m being cynical, it’s just--”

“No, you’re being realistic,” I admit, sighing deeply. “I wish you didn’t have to worry about it.”

“I wish you didn’t either.”

“Well, too bad. I worry about everything,” I laugh, only half in jest. “So don’t worry about what I’m worrying about because chances are, I’m already worrying about it.”

“That worries me.”

I don’t even need to look over to see the grin that is stretching across his lips, but I still do because I still want to see it. It’s just as blinding as always, but this time there’s some real worry hiding behind it.

I decide to change the subject, though, because I do see that hint of genuine worry in his eyes, and he doesn’t need to do that. “Where do I need to drop you off?”

“There should be a car waiting for me somewhere outside your office.”

Slowly, as I stop at the redlight, I turn to look at him. “You have no idea how fancy that just sounded.”

“It’s the truth!” He defends. “They dropped me off earlier. I didn’t just walk through downtown Atlanta until I got to your office.”

“It’s a good thing,” I reply, looking back at the road as the light turns green. He would’ve literally gotten mobbed, probably. “What time are you done today?”

“Not sure,” he sighs. “Why?”

“No reason,” I shrug, parking my car.

Chris gives me a look. “You can go see Dodger even when I’m not there, you know.”

“I feel bad!”

“Why? I’m telling you that you can,” he nudges my arm. “I gave you the spare key for a reason.”

“Okay,” I breathe. “Can I?”

“Please do,” he replies sincerely. “Send me pictures.”

“Deal.”

He’s still grinning wildly as I park my car, glancing at the clock to see I’ve still got twenty minutes left for my lunch hour. But he probably needs to get back to filming, so he should probably go now.

A frown settles over my features at the thought.

“How much longer is your lunch hour?”

“Twenty minutes,” I tell him. “But if you need to go right now--”

“No, I’ve got twenty minutes,” he turns to face me, unbuckling his seatbelt. “But if you need to go back to work now…”

I shake my head, fighting back a smile. “I’ve got twenty minutes.”

+++

I call Camile on my way back to my apartment -- well, Chris’s, because I’m going to see Dodger first thing.

“Hey girl,” my best friend answers tiredly. “What’s up?”

“What’s up with you?” I counter.

“Exhausted,” she lets out a laugh. “Ready to be home and in bed. You?”

“Same. Well, I’m going to see Dodger, but I am tired.”

“Dodger, huh?” She teases. The mere mention of my soulmate’s dog -- or anything to do with Chris, for that matter -- and her attitude brightens. “No Chris?”

“Chris and I had lunch today,” I say, earning a muffled scream from her. “And he’s still filming anyway, so.”

“But he’s letting you go see his dog.”

“Hey, Dodger needs love, too.” I’ll probably take him out for a walk, too. He probably needs to pee and breathe some fresh air. I’ll just make a pitstop at my apartment to change out of this dress and heels.

“Mhm,” Camile coos. “I’m still not over the fact that you’re Chris Evans’s soulmate.”

“I’m not over the fact that I have a soulmate.”

“Please,” Camile breathes. “You always knew you did.”

“But I didn’t know if they’d want me.”

“Fair,” she says. “Speaking of, has he kissed you yet?”

“Cam!”

“It’s a valid question!” She yells back. “It’s been a month. Jack kissed me after a week.”

“Well that’s you and Jack,” I remind her. “Speaking of, do you think you guys would be free this weekend, Saturday night?”

“We...can be, why?”

“Dinner. At Chris’s. With me and a couple of his friends.”

“Oh...my...God.”

“Is that a yes?” I laugh. “You’ll have to mentally prepare Jack. And make sure he won’t freak out. Sebastian and Scarlett are coming I think.”

“Sebastian Stan and Scarlett Johannson?”

“I think that’s their names, yes.”

I can practically hear her eye roll. “Oh, you think.”

“I just know Scarlett as Chris’s best friend who brings him groceries to cook dinner with while he’s on lockdown and Seb as Chris’s friend who keeps trying to take his phone to send weird text messages to me,” I smile, thinking of their antics. Chris says it’s annoying, but I know he loves it. “Not...whatever their characters’ names are.”

“Oh my God.”

“Is that a yes you’ll be there or not?”

“Of course we’ll be there,” Camile blurts. “I’ll tell Jack in advance who all is coming so he won’t pass out when we get there.”

“Thank you,” I chuckle. “I’ll tell you the time whenever we figure that out, but yeah. Saturday night.”

“You got it. We’ll be there.”

“Good,” I sigh, pulling my car into the parking deck. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go change and then take Dodger for a walk.”

“Well you are excused,” she replies in a matter-of-fact tone. “Have fun.”

+++

I meant to take Dodger for a walk. That was actually the plan, but somewhere in between walking into Chris’s apartment and kneeling down to play with Dodger and searching for his leash, we ended up asleep in the living room floor.

I didn’t know I had fallen asleep either until I felt footsteps on the floor. I cracked my eyes open, Dodger’s head still tucked under my chin, and craned my neck to see Chris standing with a soft smile on his lips.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” I murmur, sitting up and keeping a hand on Dodger. “How was work?”

“Good, we wrapped early.” Chris crouches down next to us on the floor, gently petting Dodger and searching my eyes. “I was wondering why you went quiet.”

“Oops,” I chuckle, rubbing my eyes, stopping myself when I remember I still have makeup on my face. I curse when I look at my fingers, black smudges all on them. “Ugh.”

Chris sees my frustration and nods down the hall. “I have some makeup wipes in the bathroom.”

I raise an eyebrow, my hands falling into my lap. “You have makeup wipes?”

“Sometimes I forget they put makeup on me when we’re filming and have to take it off here,” he explains, and adds, “but you’re welcome to use them.”

“Well, thank you,” I begin to stand. “Did you wear makeup today?”

He looks up at the ceiling, clearly trying to remember, but I just shake my head.

“I’ll bring one back.”

I walk down the hall to his bathroom, finding -- sure enough -- a packet of makeup wipes on the counter. They’re a cheap brand, but I didn’t expect him to have the same kind I use -- which are in a pink package and for sensitive skin with aloe infused in the wipes.

I clean the eye makeup I smudged and wipe away the little foundation I had worn today before tossing the wipe. I grab a second, shutting off the bathroom light as I venture back into the living room, finding Chris laying down next to Dodger now, holding his paw.

I can’t help the smile that crawls onto my face as I get closer. I lay on the other side of Dodger, moving so I can reach over and wipe the makeup from Chris’s face, careful not to wake the sleeping puppy between us.

I don’t realize how intimate the moment is until I’m wiping under his eyes, and I realize how deeply he’s staring into mine.

“Hi,” I say nervously, swiping quickly over his forehead and nose, hitting the places I assume they’d use some concealer just to cover some redness. 

“Hi,” he replies, letting out a laugh when I tap his nose with the wipe once I’m finished. “Thank you.”

I set the wipe above our heads so I’ll remember to throw it away when we get up. “You’re welcome,” I murmur, bending my arm to rest my head on it like a pillow. “How was your day?”

“Good,” he breathes, then gets this cheesy smile on his face as he says, “I had a really cute lunch date today.”

I scoff, rolling my eyes, but I’m smiling, and he keeps going. 

“She let me hold her hand, too. Made me so damn happy.” 

I pause and just look at him, my chest swelling with every moment that he keeps going.

“She’s really pretty,” he murmurs, his hand reaching over Dodger to tuck some hair out of my face. “But I know she doesn’t think it.”

“What’s got you in such a sappy mood?” I tease, trying to deflect and change subjects. It’s my one and only talent.

But Chris isn’t letting me get away that easy. “No reason,” he shakes his head, best he can when he’s laying on the floor. “Can I tell you something?”

I nod. “Anything.”

“I’ve been in a sappy mood,” he chuckles when he uses my words, “for a while. Since the day I met you.”

My face softens.

“But I didn’t want to say anything. I didn’t want to scare you away.”

“Why would you scare me away?” I whisper, my hand reaching out for his. He finds mine easily, lacing our fingers together and resting them on Dodger’s stomach.

“Because everyone’s watching me,” he says, his voice quiet and his eyes sincere. “Everyone’s always watching and I don’t want them to watch you too. I want you to just be mine, not everyone’s.”

“Chris…”

“And if the fame scares you away then that’s just what happens. I know it isn’t for everyone.”

“Chris…”

“But I know I’d rather have you in my life, whatever way I can, than not at all.”

“Chris, stop,” I squeeze his hand, getting his attention. “You’re not going to scare me away.”

“I don’t want to.”

“And you won’t. Nothing will,” I say without thinking, and the scariest part is, I know I mean it. “I know fame isn’t meant for everyone, and that’s fine. I don’t think it’s for me, but that doesn’t matter. My soulmate isn’t fame.”

He cracks a small smile. He always does when I call him my soulmate. I remember the first time I noticed it, I made a mental note with myself to call him my soulmate more often when I’m with him.

“My soulmate is Chris Evans,” I keep going, running my thumb over the back of his hand. “This super cute guy from Boston who also happens to be a superhero in his spare time.”

He laughs then, but it’s small. It’s not his usual belly laugh.

“Who loves his family and has the biggest heart I’ve ever seen. And who has a pretty awesome puppy.” Dodger stirs in his sleep, tucking his head further into Chris’s chest. “And he opens doors for me. He brings me coffee and surprises me for lunch and makes me laugh. He makes me smile more than I’ve smiled in years. And he gives really good hugs.” 

I can see him slowly cheering up, so I say one more thing.

“Oh, and his hands are super soft, too.”

He laughs loudly then, his free hand holding onto his chest as he leans back a little, his eyes closing. The noise wakes Dodger who jumps up and runs off into the kitchen, leaving Chris and I holding hands, laying in the middle of his living room floor.

The laughter dies down and I find myself scooting closer, our hands still linked together. He leans back onto his side, his eyes searching mine, a smile dancing on his lips.

“Thank you,” he whispers.

I shrug a little, smirking. “Just telling the truth, that’s all.”

“Can I tell you the truth?”

“I hope so.”

“I wanna kiss you.”

I freeze, but freeze isn’t the right word because my blood isn’t running cold. My body is warm, like it always is when I’m around him. Warm and safe.

But time stops. Or it feels like it does. Because we stay there, laying on our sides, just looking at each other, for what feels like ages but I know is only a few moments.

“Can I kiss you?” He asks, his hand squeezing mine.

And I nod. All I can do is nod.

He lets go of my hand to instead snake his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him. The rug scratches against our clothes as we move, but it doesn’t stop us, and he doesn’t stop until he’s pressed his lips against mine.

It’s nothing like I imagined — or maybe it is, and I just don’t want to admit that I’ve imagined this moment. I have, if I’m being honest. I’ve thought about kissing him from the moment I came and knocked on his door a month ago. From the moment he hugged me. 

But I obviously didn’t imagine it to be like this, both of us curled up in his living room floor, bodies pressed against each other.

His hand cradles my face as he kisses me, soft and slow, gentle as always. I’m smiling when he pulls back to breathe, resting his forehead against mine. I open my eyes and see he’s staring right at me, his eyes filled with a certain emotion I’ve never seen and don’t know how to describe, but I’m sure it’s something like what I’m feeling. I’m positive I’ve also got a dreamy and dazed look in my eyes.

We hear Dodger’s paws on the hardwood floor before we see him, and then suddenly a toy is being dropped right between us. A well-rested Dodger bounces around us before jumping onto Chris and licking his face all over.

I sit up and cover my mouth to muffle my laughter, but also to feel my lips, to see if this buzz I’m feeling is real — to see if this is really all real. If I really did just kiss my soulmate.

I did. I really did.

[kiszkakiss]

Honesty

Pairing: Josh Kiszka x Reader

[AO3 or Wattpad, if you prefer: x / x]

Summary: You're front row at a Greta Van Fleet concert and Josh wants to get to know you.

Warnings: SMUT 18+ YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED, unprotected oral and penetrative sex, long-winded way of getting to the unprotected oral and penetrative sex. Oops. 

A/N: No one asked for this. It's based on a dream I had about Josh. This is also the first time I've ever written smut, so, let me know if it makes your pussy tingle... or just let me know what you think lol

PS: Use protection, people. And pee after sex. Please and thank you.

Oh, also, Y/N is 'your name' and Y/F/N is 'your friends name'.

[Word count: 3,488]

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Josh was wailing into the microphone and Sam was grooving out — clearly in the zone. Jake was shredding on his guitar and Danny was hitting the drums harder than ever. You never thought you’d actually be able to see Greta Van Fleet live and in the front row. To be so close to them felt like a dream; surreal and magical. They were giving it their all and you appreciated their determination to put on a good show for everyone. You were close enough that you could see the sweat glistening on their skin and their heaving breaths in between songs as they got more and more into it. Jake, in particular, was so sweaty that his long brown hair was sticking to his forehead; that didn’t seem to bother him, though. Jake actually caught your eye a couple of times and Josh smiled at you when he noticed you singing along to every song, even the covers. At one point, he actually pointed between you and your friend. Oh, yeah, Y/F/N: your best friend… and ex. You were so transfixed with what was happening on stage that you forgot you weren’t there alone. He pointed between the two of you with raised brows, silently asking if you were together, you assumed. “We’re here together, not actually together-together!” you yelled over the music —Jake’s searing guitar solo— shaking your head vehemently and making a cutting motion with your hand towards your neck. Y/F/N looked at you incredulously. Oops. Josh noticed the scalding look they shot you but his face lit up with the brightest smile you’d ever seen. You couldn’t believe that you caused this gorgeous rockstar to smile that big, that beautifully. You almost felt proud as your stomach fluttered, heat rose to your cheeks and not just because you had been rocking out so much in close proximity to other fans around you.

When the band finally came out for their encore, relief flooded your body. You were worried that might have been it and didn’t want it to end. Once again, the twins were interacting with you; smiling, winking and pointing at you throughout their final songs. Y/F/N was almost rolling their eyes, although they were a fan too. Probably just jealous that you were getting most of the attention. They were kind of possessive over you, despite the two of you not being in a romantic relationship for a couple of years now, and receiving flirtatious attention from other people… that really pissed them off.

Josh said his thank you’s and goodnight’s and the band left the stage, waving as they went. That was it this time. A sadness settled in your heart and you felt tears well up in your eyes. You were still squished up against the barricade waiting for everyone else to leave. “Excuse me?” The deep voice made you look up. A tall man dressed in all black, casual attire stood in front of you. “The band wants to know if you’d be interested in coming backstage.” Your eyes widened, “Of course, I mean- I’d be very interested-“ Taking a deep breath, you managed to stutter your final response. “Yes, I’d love to!” The man smiled at your eagerness and nodded towards one of the security guys to lift you up and over the barricade. Once you had made it to the other side, you remembered. “Wait!” This caused the man to stop in his tracks and turn back around to you. “Can my friend come with me? We came together, I don’t want to leave them.” He thought about it for a second. “Yeah, okay. I’m sure they won’t mind.” That same security guy helped YFN over the barricade and you followed the man through a door that wasn’t visible from out in the standing area. Both of you were led through a dark corridor which was narrow and dingy; this venue wasn’t the best. You were actually surprised that they were staying long enough to meet fans, and backstage of all places. When you reached a door with a piece of paper taped to it that read “Greta Van Fleet”, the realisation of what was about to happen hit you like a truck. There was no time to freak out before the door opened and Josh Kiszka was standing right in front of you, welcoming you inside.

-

The dressing room was small but there was enough room for a couch and some acoustic guitars they must have been jamming on before the show. An assortment of food and drink was spread out on the vanity table and there was a bathroom tucked away around a small corner. You were admiring the lights that lined the mirrors when Josh came up to you and handed you a full champagne flute. You thanked him and clinked your glasses together. “To showbiz!” He announced. You laughed and looked to the other boys who shot Josh confused looks. “Guys, the lights.” Nothing. “Like in showbiz?” Still nothing. “Ugh, it doesn’t matter.” He paused for a moment. “Oh! Okay, to Y/N!” They all cheered at that, raising their champagne and beer bottles in the air before taking sips, your best friend included. Y/F/N was a musician too and quickly got talking to Jake, Sam and Danny about their gear. It was nice to see them revelling in the attention and really genuinely making friends with the boys. Josh, on the other hand, was more interested in you. Why? You had no idea. Other than also being a singer, you didn’t think you had that much in common. He was attractive, though. There was no way you could deny that.

The rest of the guys and Y/F/N took up the couch space, starting to get into an impromptu jam session, strumming away on their guitars. Josh was humming and vocalising along, standing by you while you were perched on the arm of the couch. You watched as he closed his eyes, just following the chord progression. His eyelashes cast shadows under his eyes and his lips looked smooth and soft as he pursed them together, occasionally swiping his tongue across them. Your eyes moved down towards his body. He was still wearing his show outfit: the white jumpsuit with golden embroidery. It was gorgeous up close and also slightly more transparent… like, you could see everything. When you realised just how see-through and tight this outfit was, you let out a soft gasp, quickly averting your gaze. “You okay?” Shoot. Josh noticed. He wasn’t supposed to notice. The guys continued playing in the background. “Yeah, I’m fine. Great, actually. This is so fun.” You were willing the redness in your cheeks to go away but it was fairly warm in the cramped space. “I’m glad you’re having a good time.” Josh said, really looking at you this time, you could feel his eyes wandering all over your face. “Why did you ask me back here?” You had to know. “You seemed cool. Fun to hang out with.” He shrugged. “And I can confirm, you’re really cool.” “No one has ever called me cool before.” You were fully blushing now, no hiding it and unable to look him in the eye. He held his hand out to you and you almost went to shake it when you realised he was offering to help you up. You took his hand, his skin feeling as soft as it looked.

Josh guided you to the other side of the room. “Just thought it would be easier to talk here. I know there’s not much space and it’s still noisy but…” Josh trailed off, leaning against the wall. “Don’t worry about it. I’m happy to even be here.” You gushed and then tried to reel it in a little. “I mean, I didn’t think I’d be making new friends today, with you guys of all people.” “I did the second I saw you.” “Oh, really? A little presumptuous but okay.” You raised your eyebrow but giggled at his confession anyway. “Sorry, I don’t want to scare you off or anything. Just being honest.” “I like honesty. It’s the best policy, you know.” Josh chuckled at that and leaned into you, tucking your hair behind your ear. “How’s this for honesty? I find you insanely attractive.” he spoke softly. “What?” You were kind of taken aback, trying to wrap your head around what was happening. You glanced over to Y/F/N and the other guys, feeling like they could hear this entirely unexpected conversation. “Seriously, Y/N. Why did you think I asked if you two were together? I needed to know if you were available.” “Don’t get me wrong, Josh. I’m so attracted to you too but…” “But…?” “But I don’t know… I mean, what do you want out of this?” “Well—“ Josh started but you interrupted. “I also don’t want you to think that I do this thing often because I do not. I’m here for the music, I would have gone home after the gig if you hadn’t asked me back here. I just needed to clarify that before we go any further.” “I’m glad you didn’t. I’m glad you agreed to meet me. Or us. Whatever.” Josh was stuttering, realising that he was too forward and not wanting to make you uncomfortable. “Look, I really like you. If you want to be friends, that’s cool too. I just want to know you.” Your head was spinning. The music playing and Josh’s voice melding together along with a ringing in your ears. “Sorry, I’m feeling super overwhelmed right now, can I…?” You pointed towards the bathroom and Josh nodded and let you have some space.

-

The bathroom wasn’t as warm as the dressing room; you could feel yourself cooling down almost immediately. You splashed some water on your face before staring at yourself in the mirror. You hadn’t even thought about what you looked like: baby hairs sticking to your forehead with sweat from actually being at the show, clothes pretty casual because you decided to wear what was comfortable. Did Josh really want to know you? Or did he just want to get laid?

There was a knock at the door, interrupting your thoughts. “Come in.” You called and the door opened, revealing a sorry-looking Josh. You didn’t turn around, just looked at him behind you, through the mirror. “Hey, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to freak you out.” He apologised as he let the door click shut behind him, muffling the music being played in the dressing room. “Don’t be. It wasn’t you. Just a lot of things happening all at once; sensory overload.” You explained and let out a weak laugh. “Feeling a bit better now, though.” Josh made his way closer to you until his front was pressed against your back. “Can I make you feel even better?” He kept his voice low and it sounded like velvet, sending shivers down your spine. You let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding and nodded, gazing at the irresistible rockstar as he nuzzled his face into your neck. “You smell so good.” “I smell like sweat.” You laughed again. “You smell like you. I like it.” He sounded sincere as he started to place wet kisses on your skin, hands wandering to your hips and squeezing. Your breathing hitched and you let Josh do his thing, just enjoying feeling him close to you. When he nipped at the skin below your ear, you let out a moan and felt him squeeze your hips harder. He spun you around to face him and you just went with your instincts.

Grabbing the back of his neck, you pulled him down into a searing kiss. Any caution you had before went out the window and you just wanted to feel all of him. When his tongue swiped your lip, you welcomed him in and ran your fingers through his curly hair, tugging at it. This made him moan quietly into your mouth and he moved his hands from your hips to your ass; squeezing some more as you caressed his torso. Your hand ran over the zipper of his jumpsuit and you stopped the kiss to look him in his eyes; silently asking if you could unzip it. Josh nodded eagerly and you wasted no time, pulling it down and pushing the top half of the jumpsuit off of his shoulders, revealing his toned torso. Josh caught your lips in another kiss while his hands wandered under your t-shirt. He hadn’t suggested or asked anything but you nodded and let out a muffled “mhm” against his lips when he brushed his hands over the back of your bra. He unclasped it with ease and moved away to help remove the clothes from your body, leaving them forgotten on the floor. “Fuck.” Josh breathed when he saw your naked chest. “Touch me. Please, Josh?” You didn’t have to ask him twice. He kissed along your jaw and down your neck as his hands squeezed your breasts, occasionally twisting and pulling at your nipples. His touch alone sent arousal straight to your heat. You bit down on your lip when Josh kissed down your sternum and all over your breasts. When he sucked one of your nipples into his mouth, you gripped onto his hair. Your grip tightened when he moved to the other one, it feeling more sensitive, causing you to whimper. Josh pressed his lips to your chest, up to your neck, jaw, then your mouth; capturing your lips in a needy kiss. He was grinding into your thigh and you could feel him hardening. You couldn’t resist and rested your hand on top of his bulge. He stopped kissing you and moaned at your touch, dropping his head on your shoulder. You took that as a cue and kissed down his chest, slowly getting down on your knees in front of him. His fingers tangled in your hair as he watched you pull the rest of his jumpsuit down his thighs, revealing that he wasn’t wearing underwear. You gasped when his cock sprang out of the confines of the fabric. “Hey, I’m supposed to be making you feel better.” Josh cupped your face, his pupils blown wide and a playful smile threatening to spread across his face. “This is making me feel better.” You replied, running your hands from his thighs, up to his nipples and back down again, just admiring him. His dick was stiff and girthy; the head pink and glistening with precum already. Your mouth was watering at the thought of tasting him.

Josh bucked into your hand before you could even stroke him properly. When you started stroking —slow and steady— he let his head fall back and groaned when you placed a kiss to the underside of his cock. You kitten licked there a few times before taking the head into your mouth; sucking and swirling your tongue while cradling his balls in your other hand and listening as his breathing became more erratic. You pulled your mouth off of the tip with a loud pop and covered your mouth as if that would stifle the sound. Josh shushed you but he was chuckling and shaking his head, his eyes dark but full of sparkle and joy. When you took all of him into your mouth, his grip on your hair tightened and you enjoyed him holding you and controlling the pace, thrusting gently into your mouth. He pulled you off of him by your hair and took your hands in his own to help you get up. “That felt so good, baby.” He whispered against your lips, caressing your body as he spoke. “Didn’t wanna cum yet.” You smiled and giggled as he spun you around again to face the sink, watching him in the mirror. You noticed his chest heaving up and down, face flushed and lips swollen; matching you. Josh wrapped his arms around your waist, pressed more kisses to your neck and began playing with your nipples, working you back up again.

He fiddled with the button and zipper of your jeans and pulled them down, along with your underwear; letting them settle around your knees. You gripped the sink counter and spread your legs as far as you could, allowing Josh all the access he needed. With one hand wrapped across your stomach, his hard-on pressed against your ass, Josh’s other hand wandered to your thighs, purposely avoiding your center. “Please.” You whimpered, unable to be more specific but Josh knew what you needed. He slid his index finger through your folds, coating it in your arousal. “Is this all for me? You’re so wet for me?” All you could do was nod and moan as quietly as possible. Then, he added his middle finger, slicking it up as well and then focusing on your clit. The pressure was soft as he slid his fingers over your clit in small circles. You reached behind you to grab the back of his neck and pulled him down into a desperate kiss, despite the awkward angle. Grinding your ass back into his pelvis, you felt his fingers start to slide inside you. The palm of his hand rubbed against your clit as he moved his fingers in and out of your heat. You could feel your orgasm building already. “Oh, my god.” you breathed as he continued to pump his fingers in and out of you, over and over, faster and faster until your orgasm washed over you, making your back arch and your toes curl. His fingers stilled as you pulsed around him and tried to catch your breath.

A short moment went by as Josh gave you time to come down. He used his arousal drenched hand to stroke himself. “Fuck me. Please.” You were practically begging, bent over the sink, presenting yourself to him. Despite being exhausted and oversensitive from your orgasm, you needed to feel all of him inside you. He gave himself one more tug and lined himself up with your heat. As he started to push inside, you gripped the counter tighter - the sensation of him filling you up almost made your eyes roll back. Once he was buried inside to the hilt, he stayed there, allowing you to adjust to his size; the stretch was absolutely delicious. When you couldn’t wait anymore, you moved forward, letting his cock slip out a little and pushing yourself back onto him. “So tight.” Josh seemed breathless and lost for words. He was holding onto your hips and watching himself slip in and out of you, thrusting slowly, savouring the sensation of you around him. “Fuck. Faster." You demanded. He couldn’t say no to that. His pace quickened and you both couldn’t hold in your moans, breathing louder and more erratic. “Oh, god. Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.” You breathed, so close to your second orgasm. Josh could feel you getting tighter around him and reached down to massage your clit in quick motions, from side to side, while increasing his speed and fucking you harder. “It’s okay, love. Cum for me.” It was all you could do to squeeze your eyes shut and let Josh pull your orgasm out of you. He continued to fuck you through your orgasm, chasing his own high. Only a few more thrusts and he came inside you with a low groan.

“Shit.” You whispered. “I think we were loud.” The music had stopped... when did they stop playing? Josh was still inside you, catching his breath, when there was a knock at the door. “Hey, Y/N, we need to get going.” It was Y/F/N. Josh swiftly pulled out of you and tucked himself back into his jumpsuit, pulling it back over his shoulders and zipping it up. You could feel his cum dripping down your thigh but you grabbed your bra and t-shirt, hastily putting them back on. “Yeah! Sorry, we were just…” Josh looked to you, panic in his eyes, “…having a heart to heart?” The question on the end was not helping as you cleaned yourself up as best as you could and pulled your jeans back up. “Oh... I thought Y/N was in here.” They said, confused; obviously oblivious to Josh leaving the dressing room after you. “I am, I’m in here! I’ll be two seconds.” You called out to them. They didn’t respond. You might have fucked up.

As you were fixing your hair in the mirror and willing yourself to look less fucked-out, Josh let out a sigh. “I have to say, that was incredible.” He said, a mix of lust and genuine fondness of you in his voice. You just winked at him. “It was. We need to do that again sometime.”

Taglist: @gretastanfleet, @shes-outta-sight​, @lantern-inthenight​, @all-things-19​, @younpeople-oldsouls 

[ayyoitsalex]

Chapter 10 - My Time To Shine

From the time I was seventeen I've been responsible for the meals prepared at the biggest holiday of them all; Thanksgiving. It's taken over as my personal favorite because I get to spend the day doing what I love, and what I do best. When it comes to me cooking for thanksgiving, my family has learned a few things. I know what I'm doing, don't distract me, and don't change my music. We got the week off from school, so I stayed up at my parent's house to get prepped for the upcoming event. Everyone was curious as to what kind of stops I was pulling out this year, but as always I wasn't saying. I'd come up with some new ideas I wanted to try out, and this was as good a time as any. When my siblings moved out I had my choice of which room I wanted to call my own. I picked Selena's room since it came with the best sunset views, and got the best night time breezes. When I got to be around sixteen I made the decision to paint the walls from the dark purple to a red. I hoped Selena wouldn't be too upset at what I'd done to her room. When I moved out, our parents kept the room relatively the same, but now there's not a bunch of clothes on the floor like I'm used to seeing it. I woke up early Tuesday with the task of doing the shopping on my mind. I called up my siblings to see which one of them could accompany me. Only Natalie was available, so I waited for her to come and pick me up.  Natalie unlocked the door and let herself in with baby Lexi in her arms. Before I could get up for a hug, she forced Lexi into my arms. "GOTTA PEE!" She screamed running to the bathroom. Lexi smiled at me as I held her close. "Your mommys so crazy Lexi. Did you know that?" "Yeah." She said laughing. Lexi can answer yes or no questions, but to whether or not she knows what it means remains to be seen. Natalie emerged from the bathroom looking relieved as ever. "Okay we ready?" She asked. "Yeah." Lexi said again putting her hands up. "Aha I guess that's a yes, let's get going!" I put Lexi in her carseat behind me. Natalie plugged in her phone and turned on the car. As the engine started the radio turned on. What came on wasn't music, but was some very intense whispering that sounded like it could be right in your ears. I gave Natalie a confused look before she practically slammed her hand into the off button. She fumbled around with her phone to put on actual music. "Um..what the fuck was that?" Natalie's face was turnning red. "Just some..patreon audio.." "What who's voice is that even?" "Dude it's so crazy it's this chick that does anime voices, but y'know makes them say bad things.." "Oh my god Natalie you're a freak haha." I palmed my face laughing hysterically. "Shut up! We all have our little things. This one just happens to be mine." "So..it's like audio porn?" "NO ABSOLUTELY NOT." She smacked the back of my head. "You little shit head.." "Ow!" "I am still your big sister y'know! Need to show me my respect!" We continued our drive to the store. When we got there  Natalie just followed behind as I pulled items into the basket. I was on a mission to get everything i needed. I didn't look back a few times, and at times lost Natalie through the crowd. "Elizabeth! Slow down a little!" When we finished checking out we went back home to put them all into the fridge. "Jesus how big is this turkey?" "Fifteen pounds." I answered looking through the vegetables, and looking through my checklist. "Can I just say I'm so glad you're good at cooking?" She hugged me. "Aha you could stand to mention it more often." The front door unlocked by Selena with her kids and Sam. "Helllo?" Selena called out for anyone home. "We're in here!" I answered. The kids rushed into the living room diving onto the couches. "Excuse me boys!" I stood there hands on my hips. Cole and AJ looked at one another before making their way towards me. I leaned down. "Hi aunt Liz." They said together hugging me, and kissing my cheeks on each side. "Love you guys." I smiled mussing up their hair as they walked back. "Well hey sister, excited for thanksgiving?" I turned to Selena. "Always! Gotta break out my fancy maternity pants so I won't lose a button." "Oh my god haha." I started taking out bowls to do as much prep work as I could before hand to make my life easier. That meant dicing up my mire poix, dry brining my turkey, making my compound butter, and cutting up bread for stuffing. My sisters both gathered around like I was doing magic, when I was just peeling vegetables. They continued looking on amazed as I chopped vegetables so easily and at times without looking. It might be stupid but it really does make me feel special. It's not that my sisters are bad cooks, I think it's just the fact that I'm going to school for cooking they think I have some more efficient way of doing simple things. Which I totally do.   "Lizzy are you sure you don't need any help?" Selena looked at me worried. I put down my knife and shook the aches out of my hand. "Yeah yeah I got it. You know me, I like doing it all." "Mm well if you say so. We can help too.." "I know I know, and I will need some help in the next couple days and maybe using you guys' ovens." "Jesus Liz what's all being made?" "Top secret!" Both Selena and Natalie rolled their eyes while I rubbed my hands together smiling devilishly. "Though if you really are set on helping these are some recipes you guys can do, and I made them as easy as possible." "Are you calling us stupid?! I HAVE A MASTERS DEGREE ELIZABETH!" Selena said faking getting mad. I rolled my eyes and went back to my cutting board. -Thursday- It's the big day and everything needs to go as planned or else I might kill somebody. I'm usually more go with the flow and easy going, but when it comes to cooking there is only one way to do things and it's my way. I was up around 5 am to start slow cooking some of the bigger proteins like the turkey and beef wellington I prepped the night before. Before putting the turkey into the oven I massaged the smoked garlic compoud butter underneath the skin. It's not the nicet feeling thing to do, but it makes a whole hell of a lot of difference down the line. I was still a bit sleepy, so I turned on the tv to wake me up a little. I flipped through the literal hundred of channels trying to find anything, but nothing was on. I turned on my newest favorite podcast and listened to "dead meat with James and Chelsea". I'm the only one of my family who is a huge horror movie buff. The only person I can get to go with me is Nathan, but he's not a addict like I am. Mom came down about an hour and a half after I did. "The only day I can expect you up this early." Mom laughed. "Well what can I say I love you all that much." I flashed a big smile to her. "Mm well happy thanksgiving my little head chef." She kissed the top of my head before going to get a cup of coffee. Nathan dropped by first around eight, and like the caring brother he is, he brought me breakfast. "Special delivery." He smirked handing me a bag of donuts. "Thanks brother!" I stuffed one in my mouth while giving him a hug. "Dinners gonna be ready about 4!" "Alright I'll have the girls all dressed and ready to see what you've come up with this year." "ITS FINNA BE LIT!" I smiled jumping up and down. "Right right..lit." Nathan not the one for today's slang terms. "Soph is making pies by the way!" Nathan said walking out the door. "Oh sweet! I knew I could trust one of you." -11 am- I was starting to get a little tired, but it wasn't anything I wasn't used to. I opened the fridge for the perfect remedy of an energy drink. I'd changed from my morning pajamas to a pair of jeans and my chef's coat to really feel the part. "Just like your father." Aunt Camryn said from behind me. I practically spit all over the fridge. "JESUS CHRIST." I put my hand over my chest. "I didn't hear anyone come in! My hearts like racing now." "Mm well thats from your lil energy nonsense. Drink coffee like an adult." "HUMPH. No coffees gross." "Peasant." Aunt Camryn muttered sipping her coffee. I turned my attention to the stove where I had potatoes, pasta, and stuffing working. Aunt Camryn peeked over my shoulder to see what I was working with, but I shielded her off. "No peeking!"  I practically shrieked as aunt Camryn took a step back. "Good lord Elizabeth you're not re-inventing the wheel here." "This is the one time I get to show out and I want to surprise. So please shoo." I even gave her a little hand wave motion.  Aunt Camryn looked like she was about to smack the life out of me. Mom walked in probably saving my face. "Nicole! She just told me to shoo!" She couldn't believe my audacity. "Haha c'mon Camryn leave Elizabeth to do her thing. You good here sweetie?" "Yeah I got it mom." She winked at me before guiding aunt Camryn into the other room. Selena walked in carrying trays of appetizers to appease guests while I finished cooking. "Well how's it coming along baby chef?" Selena smiled giving me a hug. "Everythings on schedule for 4 pm dinner." "Awesome, well I brought something special for you sincey you're being so great." She rummaged through the bags and pulled out a bowl of macaroni and cheese. It's my ultimate comfort food, and Selena would always make it for me when she would babysit. "YESS!" I ripped off the saran wrap and dug right in. I forgot I even had a hunger need until the first bite hit. "See not the only one who can cook. I also made more for dinner later for an extra side." "See you're helping!" I said like I was talking to one of her boys.   "Funny." Selena looked at me arms crossed. I got up and gave her another hug and kiss as a thank you. Although I didn't wipe my mouth enough so Selena had bits of cheese on her. "*sigh I expect things like this from my kids, not my adult sister." She pulled out wipes for her face.   "Oh! I have stuffing in that tray that needs to be finished off, can you do it in your oven please?" "Yeah sure, anything else?" I took a minute to run through the list in my head. "There's a tray of biscuits that need to be baked there. They're all portioned out, just put them in at 375, and brush the butter on top when they're done." "YES CHEF!" Selena saluted to me smiling. "Damn right yes chef!" "Okay we'll be back around 3." I pulled the turkey and beef at the same time to let them rest. The smell was absolutely intoxicating, roasted garlic, lemon, parsley, and bacon. It all was coming out the way in envisioned it. Mom helped me get all the serving plates while dad and uncle Logan set the table. Aunt Camryn "supervised" along with her glass of wine. My siblings all began to arrive with their families, so I stood at the door awaiting my tolls from the kids. "Happy thanksgiving auntie Liz here this is for you!" Daisy smiled happy as always. She hugged me tight and handed me a card she made of her handprint drawn into a turkey. "Thank you Daisy!" I squeezed her tight before moving onto the next in line. "What you got for me Julian?" I smiled down at him. He didn't say anything at first going straight into the hug. "Love you auntie Liz." AJ and Cole were next. "I wonder which of you loves me more..?" I said twiddling my thumbs. They shoved their way into my arms hugging as tight as they could. "Aha okay okay I see you both love me a lot." They laughed letting go. I looked at the table with the all the food I'd prepared along with sides prepared by everyone else, and marveled at it all. When everyone finally got a look at it they did as I did and were in awe of it. Along with the two stars of the show there was grilled asparagus, roasted brussel sprouts with pancetta, butter poached shrimp, pumpkin risotto, roasted acorn squash, mashed potatoes, creamed spinach, stuffing, baked macaroni and cheese with a parmesan crust, and garden salad. The smells mixed together in the dining room and I could see everyone starting to salivate just a little at the sight. The dessert table looked just as amazing with the contributions of my sister-in-laws and siblings. "Elizabeth this looks so good. You did a great job." Selena putting her hands over my shoulders. "Yeah good job Liz it smells incredible." Nathan said looking over all the choices spread across the table. "I can't believe you did this on your own.." Natalie smiled. They all surrounded me in a big group hug before  we all joined hands. Dad looked to me and nodded. "Thank you god for bringing us all together and allowing me to show my family just how much they mean to me with a skill you've blessed me with. We give thanks for all the food we're about to have and pray for a good end to the coming year. Amen." "Amen." Everyone collectively answered back. Mom handed me my carving knife and I made the first cut into serving everyone. When everyone had a full plate we took our seats around the house. I plated up last and sat at the table between Sophia and Selena. "I'm so glad I've got my stretchy jeans on Liz. Cause definitely going back for more." Selena smiled eating. As dinner went on everyone would walk by and drop compliments to me and say thank you. It's what made it all worth it. Everyone seeing what I could do, and being recognized for it. I didn't care that my legs hurt from standing all day, my fingers had blisters from the knives, or I was tired beyond belief. Knowing that everyone enjoyed it so much made it worth going through. The kids dropped by me again to say thank you before starting dessert. "You did real good hon." Dad said kissing the top of my head as he walked towards the sink. "We'll all get the dishes sweetie. Take a break finally." Mom nudged me over to the recliner. "Yes will definitely do that." I collapsed into the chair, putting my feet up. The pain in my legs slowly subsiding while my body began to relax. I didn't move for a good twenty minutes before Selena walked by with two plates of pecan pie slices for the both of us. She handed one to me and we cheers'd our forks. I wasn't a pie person growing up, but they've grown on me. After dessert hit me everyone began contemplating the next step. My siblings finished off the dishes, and the kids were all starting to look sleepy. I cracked open another energy drink and split it with Selena. "So are we doing this?" Natalie asked eagerly. "Can you watch the kids?" Selena turned to mom. "We'll just put them to bed. We won't be gone more than a few hours." "Aw man guys go without me you know I hate it." Nathan waved off. "BABE! No way you gotta we can get a new tv." Sophia nudged him. Nathan's eye's lit up. "Yeah the kids can just sleep here while you're out. Oh

[backtobasicbellas]

amy x hope + “Why are you so jealous?”

word count: 2,269

//

In retrospect, Amy should have known this probably was never going to end well.

This being the fact she’s fake dating Hope in attempts to make Ryan jealous.

It happens in the bathroom at school one day. After a terribly awkward encounter with Ryan which leaves Amy absolutely flustered and muttering how stupid she is, Hope emerges from a stall with an amused smirk.

“That was painful to listen to,” Hope tells her. “I was just trying to pee in peace.”

Amy looks up from her self-deprecating muttering and somewhat freezes when she sees Hope. Her cheeks immediately begin to flush.

“Uh, you were...you were in there the whole time?”

“Yup,” Hope nods, popping the ‘p’ in her response. “Heard everything.”

Amy rolls her head back in embarrassment and frustration. “God, she probably thinks I’m such a freak.”

“Most likely.”

Amy gives her a helpless look.

Hope shrugs, still wearing her smirk.

“You know what would help?”

“What?”

“You actually dating someone and not spending every waking second with your neurotic wife.”

Amy opens her mouth, but there’s nothing that comes out. She’s offended by multiple parts of Hope’s last comment, and she isn’t quite sure where to begin. She barely even knows Hope, but she knows the girl is never one to hold back her thoughts for the sake of someone else.

“Molly’s not-” Amy cuts herself off, deciding that’s not the most important part of their discussion right now. “How am I supposed to date someone when I can barely talk to a girl I’m interested in?” 

It’s then that Hope’s eyes light up with mischief and she tilts her head in a menacing way.

“Who said you had to actually date someone?”

And that’s how it starts, after Hope practically corners Amy in the bathroom and concocts a plan to pretend to be Amy’s girlfriend. Amy thinks she’s crazy, but Hope is kind of scary and intriguing and beautiful all at the same time and really, she can get all the help she can get if she wants a girlfriend before she dies so, she goes through with it.

This is how they end up here, now, with Amy’s back against the lockers and Hope towering over her with one arm over head head and resting against the locker to keep her steady. Hope looks down at her with an easy smile on her face, one that might’ve seemed unnatural to anyone else, but to Amy she thinks it fits Hope well.

Amy’s getting used to this now; she’s getting used to how she and Hope take turns picking each other up in the mornings for school. She’s used to Hope hanging out on the hood of her car while waits for Amy to finish up whatever extracurricular she has that day, either reading or writing or sketching. She’s used to having Hope come over, listening to music or watching a movie or just spending hours talking while they lie on her bedroom floor.

Being with Hope is easy; she’s more than her harsh comments and intimidating beauty. Hope is smart and intricate and so much more complex than anyone else understands.

And this is the problem now, because Amy thinks she’s falling for Hope.

Despite her scary and somewhat bitchy nature, Hope goes out of her way always to make sure Amy’s comfortable with anything and everything. Whether it’s holding her hand, kissing her cheek or even kissing her in front of Ryan and other people - she always manages to make sure she’s not doing too much.

 (“You don’t have to ask if you can kiss me every time anymore,” Amy says shyly. “It’s cool.”

Hope looks at her with and tell her in a genuine voice, “Consent in important.”

Amy bites her lip to stop herself from smiling like an idiot, because that might’ve been the sweetest thing Hope’s ever said to her.)

Sometimes when they hold hands Hope’s thumb traces shapes on the back of Amy’s hand soothingly, softly. It makes Amy’s insides melt just a little every time.

And now, Hope is looking at her in the middle of this damn hallway like she’s the most interesting person on earth, and it just about drives Amy insane.

But this is all pretend. Hope is doing all these things because she should as a fake girlfriend.

(She’s a damn good one at that.)

Hope leans down and presses a kiss to Amy’s forehead before her other hand is coming up to rub soft circles on Amy’s lower back.

“Ryan just walked by,” Hope mumbles by her ear, giving her chills. 

“Oh,” Amy says, trying to keep her breathing even. “Thanks.”

Amy honestly can’t even tell if it’s working; she’s finding herself paying more attention to Hope and less to Ryan these days.

Apparently it is working though because Ryan is magically beginning to talk to Amy a lot more. It’s almost like any excuse she can, she talks to Amy. And quite honestly, Amy doesn’t even know what to do with all the attention. Between Hope playing a damn good fake girlfriend and Ryan suddenly picking up interest, Amy thinks she might pass out at any given minute.

“Dude, you’re like a total lesbian heart throb,” Molly tells her at lunch one day.

Amy snorts. “Yeah right. This thing with Hope isn’t even real, remember? We’re pretending.”

Molly hums like she knows something Amy doesn’t, but Amy doesn’t seem to notice.

“Ryan’s been talking to me a lot,” Amy says one day when they’re laying on Amy’s floor.

Hope is quiet for a moment before she replies, “I’ve noticed.”

Amy hums, a little too lost in thought to notice the shift in Hope’s tone.

“I think she wants to hang out soon,” she continues. “She was telling me about this cool spot she and her skater friends hangout at after school. She was saying that I should check it out some time.”

“Maybe you should,” Hope says, suddenly getting up. “I have to go.”

Amy frowns, checking her watch. Hope never leaves this early.

“Where are you going?”

Hope shrugs, not looking at her. “I have some stuff to catch up on.”

Amy sits up in confusion and watches as Hope grabs her keys and her backpack, slinging it over her shoulder without glancing once at Amy.

“I’ll see you tomorrow morning,” she says.

“Oh um, okay,” Amy answers dumbly. “Bye Hope.”

(And honestly, for as smart as Amy can be, she’s really stupid when it comes to girls.)

She and Ryan start hanging out at school, Amy guesses. It’s not like, they plan it or anything, but Ryan somehow happens to be around more often than not when Hope and Molly aren’t and it’s just, kind of nice to have another person to hang out with.

(Amy doesn’t realize that sometimes, Hope sees them.

She watches for a moment before she storms away, unhappy features settled on her face.)

She doesn’t think too much of it when Gigi approaches her after Ryan skates away to class.

“What are you doing?” Gigi demands, eyes wide.

“Uh,” Amy stutters, unsure how she feels about having Gigi up in her face. “I - uh, what?”

“You’re going to ruin it!” Gigi exclaims, throwing her hands up in the air as she takes a step back. “Why would you do that?”

Amy somewhat shrinks into herself as she says, “I don’t know what you’re talking about Gigi.”

Gigi leans in once again, but this time she whispers, “She’s more vulnerable than you think.”

Now Amy just furrows her eyebrows. “What?”

But the bell rings and suddenly Gigi is running off to what Amy hopes is her next class.

Amy can only sigh before she heads into her own class, where she knows she’ll find Hope.

She doesn’t notice how lately, Hope’s been a bit more affection and holds Amy’s hand a little longer.

She doesn’t notice the way Hope’s face lights up when she walks into a room.

So when one day, Hope’s the one that has to stay after school for one of her art projects, Amy doesn’t think twice about hanging out with Ryan in the parking lot and attempting to learn how to skateboard.

Amy has fallen twice and tripped three times, but she’s having fun and entertaining herself while she waits for Hope.

She misses the way Hope’s entire demeanor shifts when she walks out into the parking lot and sees how Amy is laughing and looking at Ryan.

“Amy,” she calls out in a sharp tone, making a beeline for her car.

Amy jolts at the sound of her voice, but recognizes it as Hope. She bids Ryan a goodbye - which gets a “later dude” in response - and walks over to Hope’s car, hopping in.

“How was your project?” she asks.

Hope turns on the car and replies shortly, “Fine.”

They don’t speak the whole way home, something that makes Amy uncomfortable. The music is louder than usual today and Hope seems to be gripping the steering wheel tightly. She keeps her eyes on the road and never once looks at Amy, and something feels off.

“Hope, are you mad at me?” Amy asks in a small voice.

“No.”

“Why aren’t you talking?”

“Because I don’t want to.”

Amy doesn’t think she’ll get much more out of Hope, so she sits back and takes the answers for what she can get.

When Hope pulls up to Amy’s house, she makes no move to stop the car. All she does is put her car in park and waits, one hand still on the steering wheel.

“..Are you not coming inside?” Amy asks. “I thought you wanted to do homework.”

“Not anymore.”

And Amy feels like she’s a very patient person, but Hope’s attitude since they got in the car is starting to bother her.

“If I did something you should just tell me.”

“You didn’t do anything,” Hope snaps. “Maybe I’m just not in the mood. Not everything’s about you, you know.”

Amy blinks, not expecting the attack from Hope.

“If you’re upset we should just talk about it,” Amy suggests.

“Don’t you have Ryan to talk to now?”

The way Hope sneers takes Amy by surprise. She hasn’t seen this side of Hope in a long time, not since she was too afraid to even approach the other girl. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Ugh God nothing,” Hope groans with a roll of her eyes.

“I don’t believe you,” Amy tells her.

“Well, too bad.”

“Hope.”

“Amy.”

“We’re talking about this.”

“No we’re not.”

“Hope,” Amy repeats.

“Fuck Amy!” Hope hisses, shutting off her car and getting out before slamming the door.

Amy watches in the mirror as Hope makes her way to the back of the car, leaning against it. She waits for a few seconds before she also follows suit - minus the slamming - and stands in front of Hope, arms crossed.

“What is your problem?”

“Jesus, why are we even still doing this?” Hope asks, exasperated. “Why is this still going on? Ryan’s all over you, you got what you wanted. She’s always hanging around you every second I’m not there. She always trying to impress you with her dumb skater tricks and honestly Amy, she’s not smart enough for you.”

As Hope rattles on every possible way Ryan has Amy’s attention, Amy notices the way Hope gets worked up. Something clicks in her head, something that Molly had teasingly joked about the other day.

(“God she’s sending daggers to Ryan,” Molly muttered when Hope goes to throw away her tray. “It’s like she’s jealous or something.”

“She’s just that good,” Amy had shrugged.)

“Why are you so jealous?” Amy asks, quirking an eyebrow.

Hope makes a face. “What?”

“You’re jealous,” Amy tells her.

“No I’m not,” Hope scoffs.

“Yes you are, or else you wouldn’t be so worked up on Ryan talking to me like we planned.”

Hope’s jaw sets and she won’t look directly at Amy. Amy thinks she’s onto something here.

“This was just supposed to be an act,” Amy tells her.

Hope’s working her jaw and now is pointedly not looking at Amy.

“It was,” she agrees.

“But I don’t think it is anymore,” Amy continues.

Hope shrugs. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Amy takes a step towards her and says, “Well, it’s not for me anymore.”

Only then does Hope snap her head back to look at Amy, giving her a hard look.

“What?”

“I thought it was going to be great when I finally got Ryan to notice me,” Amy shrugs. “but it wasn’t. I...already had what I needed.”

Hope just watches, trying to read Amy like she always does. Amy takes that as a sign to continue.

“Being with you is easy. I like who I am when I’m with you. I like when you hold my hand and kiss me. I don’t want to pretend it’s not real anymore.”

She bites her lip, waiting with baited breath for Hope’s response. For a fleeting moment, she feels like she’s gotten it all wrong, that Hope was upset for another reason and was just taking it out on her. She opens her mouth to take it all back when Hope is reaching out and tugging her closer by the front of her jacket.

“I like being with you,” Hope says softly, her eyes flittering down and back up. “And I like you.”

Amy smiles in relief. “Cool.”

Hope snorts. “God you’re such a loser.”

“You like this loser,” Amy reminds her.

Hope grins. “Yeah, I do.”

[idkhyuck]

My First and Last- A Renjun Soulmate AU

A/N: OKAY SO I REALLY WANTED TO TRY MY HAND AT A CHEESY SOULMATE AU BECAUSE I FLIPPING LOVE SOULMATES. idk if i hate this or not, feedback is appreciated and i’m going to post it in parts so this is only part one. I cried like a baby writing this so i hope i’m able to get the emotion i was trying to convey across. A Song i recommend listening to while reading are Berenstein by the Band Camino. just to get a feel for the longing and need. 

RENJUN x SOULMATE!READER

WARNINGS/ ANGST, MENTIONS OF MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH. 

I remember the day I turned 18 I used my ID to go to see a  Soulmate fortune Teller. All of my friends went out drinking with their soulmates. They all met theirs young. My best friend Julia; Met hers when she was 7 Charlie moved in next door and they met each other and cried because they were freaked out at what was happening.. Meeting you’re soulmate is a huge thing. You live you’re whole life waiting for this. They both can’t tell me what they felt because they barely remember it. Julia said her heart started racing and her eyes blurred out and refocused.  Usual cliché shit, The dilated eyes, the heartbeat. I just knew there had to be more to it.  Imagine spending most of my life with Julia and Charlie who can’t live with out each other. That’s another thing. Apparently being away from you’re soulmate once found is physically and emotionally painful. Old people often die in pairs because they can’t handle the pain of their lover dying. My parent’s are so hopelessly in love it hurts. Everyone around me is in love. I was a hopeless case. I honestly thought all of my teenage years I didn’t have a soulmate. I was meant to live this hopeless lonely life all my life and never know the feeling of “true love”. It sucked because kids never wasted time dating because you’ll find your one, someday. I’ve read tons of books and stories of people choosing who they fall in love with. I longed for a world like that, until I went into that fortune teller’s shop.

“I can tell you three facts about you’re soulmate.” She told me as she sat me in front of her. She looked at me, through me? Idk it was a weird experience.

“He appears older than he is.” She said. How much older could he be? I wondered to myself. I hoped it wasn’t a gross age gap. “He’s adored by many people.” Adored? Like by his family? Friends? Or like famous? “He will die shortly after you meet.” What?

“a-“ I started

“of course It’s a bit foggy, but this is what I see right now.” She said as she blinked her eyes back to herself?

“die?” I asked

“oh my dear, That’s how life is sometimes, you are a strong girl, I know you’ll be okay.” She said. It’s been 5 years since then. I now know who “he” is at the age of twenty three. I’ll never forget the moment I saw him. I was watching some music videos with my friends, They were discussing the differences of K-pop groups. It was a usual night at the dorm. I was 21 years old and in my third year of my degree. I was a business major, so I was always swamped with homework. I wasn’t really paying attention to what they were playing on the TV, I heard this voice and I Just had to look up. There he was, My soulmate. My heart started racing, I felt nauseous, My eyes could only see him. I wasn’t overcome with emotion like many say you’re supposed to be. But like it was as if someone had turned off the entire world around me and all I could see and think was SOULMATE. I blinked a few times, I’d finally lost my mind. This Korean boy was my soulmate. How? This can’t be. And he was going to die. No. he couldn’t, I wouldn’t let him. If I never met him he would never die right? He was the most beautiful human being I’d ever seen, My entire being literally throbbed upon the thought of him dying. I don’t even know his name. I looked up

“y/n? you okay?” Julia asked

“uh, yeah. Who is this group?” I asked, I just noticed how shallow my breathing was, My voice sounded so ragged.

“are you sure you’re okay?” Julia asked she sounded far away, as My soulmate had just started singing again.

“who?” I asked, my voice was tiny. I lifted my shaky hand up to point at him on the TV

“HOLY SHIT! y/n?” Julia said coming over to grab me. She knelt in front of me. “That is your soulmate isn’t it?” She said trying to hold my hands that were vibrating. I could see the other girls now intrigued, The video paused on him now. I looked up and it hurt to look at him, it hurt but I couldn’t pinpoint where, or why. Wtf the was happening to me. I tore my eyes away to look down at Julia, I nodded. “oh my god.” She whispered. awhile back I had told her what the Soulmate fortune teller told me, She was waiting for this. We had plans to move to LA after graduation with hopes of finding my soulmate in the glitz and glamour of Hollywood. That was the first night it hurt to be away from him. I spent the months after researching soulmates. They were still such a mystical thing to us as humans. Apparently there were studies of long distance soul mates having phantom pains. That would explain the why my body constantly ached. I watched how hard he worked, I grew to love his music, I picked up on the Korean so easily, the Chinese was something to be desired. I grew to love him, and I didn’t even know him. Studies also proved that once someone acknowledges their soulmate the other is able to feel it even If they haven’t met yet. I often wondered if he felt me. I know he’s dreaming of me. That’s a huge thing there are so many stories of one-sided love lorn soulmates longing to get to theirs but can’t at the time. Like when you pass on a busy street or something like that The one who doesn’t know often had dreams of their soulmate until the day they meet. There’s so much we as a human society know about soulmates. I was now apart of this society. I had my soulmate. The one thing that the fortune teller had wrong was he’s actually not old. He’s currently 19 years old, She got that wrong. I hoped and prayed she got the other thing wrong. I’d lie awake at night longing for him, I did not expect that. I cried myself to sleep many a night because it physically hurt to be without him. Julia was living her happy life, Sleeping with Charlie every night, Kissing him, feeling him, being near him, Getting to spend the rest of her life with him. As much as I longed for him I didn’t want to meet him, If I never met him he’d live his life out. How can the one person in the world that is meant for me be so ill-fated because of me. I was his harbinger of death and I hated it. I’d rather live my life never knowing him than to have to lose him one day.

 Despite my constant protests, Julia had convinced me to come spend the summer in Seoul. She hated seeing how much it hurt me to be without him. He had to be looking too she said. He was in the middle of a comeback right now so there we’re lots of promotions and shows around town. I saw a few billboards with him on it. I really didn’t have a plan, I wasn’t going to stalk him, he dealt with that enough. So after I got settled in at my apartment, I spent a few days a week at the café in his companies building. So many girls dreamed of meeting their favourites here. They’d pass through at some point right?  A few weeks passed with no luck, but today was extra busy, The staff had begun to know me at this point, My favourite staff was working today, She always let me use the Staff bathroom. I had just ordered my coffee and put it on my table I had taken out my book for the day when the urge to pee hit me. I went and asked her and she gave me the key. I was walking down the hall it was passed the room where the idols would film their things. I was kind of anxious today and I didn’t really now why. It was bugging me, I didn’t want to leave early, They were supposed to be here today. I splashed some water on my face and went back out, I locked the bathroom door behind me and heard a gasp behind me, I instantly felt chills throughout my entire body. I slowly turned and saw him standing there, I swore I blacked out for a millisecond. I froze, my legs felt heavy, My heart was racing.

“dreams. Y-y..” he said

“Renjun.” I said my voice shaky, I looked at him, he was getting paler by the second, I reached out to grab his hand, He reached out to me, our eyes never leaving the others once. The moment his hand touched mine, I felt every single emotion possible, relief mostly, pain, Pure happiness. I couldn’t help but cry. I didn’t notice I was crying until he reached down to wipe my cheek. My skin was so hot, his fingers cold to the touch. He was handling  this so much better than me.

“soulmate.” He said quietly

“y/n” I said quietly my voice shaky

“y/n” He repeated. “it’s okay.” He said and in the moment life honestly was okay. I felt so content just being near him. This is everything I could have ever wanted in life and more and it hurt me that I might not always have this would i constantly live with this fear in the back of my mind. I was sobbing at this point, He pulled me into his arms and held me there. Shushing and cooing at me telling me it was going to be okay. I had never felt more okay in my life than I did in his arms. I totally understand why Julia and Charlie were always holding onto each other.

“hey!” Someone said from behind us, The furious stomping, I looked up and saw Renjun had tears streaming down his cheeks too now. He wiped his eye with his sleeve and kind of hid me behind him.

“it’s okay.” He said in Korean.

“why?” The person asked

“she’s my soulmate.” He said his voice cracking slightly.

“what?” The person was shocked. “can’t be?” he said I peeked out and saw a tall guy I’m assuming was a body guard.

“bring her up to the practice room please?” He said wiping at his face. “She can’t go back out there now?” he said in perfect Korean. Wow I hoped I sounded like that when I spoke to him. “please?” he asked sounding small. The guard nodded. Renjun turned to me and started in English “he’s going to.” He started pointing all around “go up stairs with you.” He pointed at me and up

“I understand you.” I said my korean not as confident, his face lit up. “Are you sure this is okay?” I asked him

“I don’t know.” He said “I just know I don’t want you to leave.” He said “please go with him and wait for me?” He asked. I couldn’t say no to him, it hurt me to even think of ever hurting him. I nodded and followed behind the man. He silently led me through the back halls of the buildings. He opened a door and said

“wait here, they won’t be long.” He said “I’ll get you a guest pass.” He said then left. He returned not even a minute later with a pass “don’t do anything stupid.” He said then he was gone. I looked around, I’d seen these exact practice rooms so many  times on my computer watching him. I finally met him, He was so absolutely stunning in person, His voice was like it was made only for me to hear. He was perfect. I didn’t want to lose him, ever. I sat there trying to process everything I was feeling and all I knew was that I wanted to be in his arms again.

 He walked into the practice room, with a bottle of water and my coffee and book, How did he know, Was this a soulmate thing? I thought to myself.

“y/n” he said “how old are you?” he asked me

“23.” I answered.

“Noona.” He said taken aback, That was so cute, my health literally melted and flared up at the same time.  He came and sat beside me. “did you know?” he asked I nodded “For how long?”

“two years.” I said

“the dreams.” He said quietly eyes wide looking at nothing in particular then up at me “you’re even more beautiful in person.” He said reaching out to touch my face, Then shying away. “how are we supposed to do this?” he said thinking aloud.

“I don’t know.” I said “Please don’t be shy.” I said “it’s been two years.” My voice sounded tired and needy and I hated that he had that affect one me already. His eyes looked at me wide, The he looked down at my lips, Then he slowly leaned in, or I leaned in. I honestly don’t know. His breath mixed with mine as our faces were just centimeters apart.

“I think I love you.” He said before his lips met mine, The lightheaded airy, hot feeling that was rushing through my veins went into overdrive. I  reached up and held him behind his head. I wanted to open my eyes to see if there world really was disappearing around me like It felt like it did. Were we actually transcending into another universe together. Hopefully one where we could always feel like this. His arms wrapped behind me pulling me into him. I was going to pass out yet today I was sure of it. I pulled away much to his dismay, His whine barely audible. I looked at him, His cheeks flushed, his lips swollen and red, his eyes lit up like a galaxy. I looked down at his shaky arm that was wrapped around me. His breath was as rough as mine felt.  A smile came up on his face as he tried to steady his breath “Yeah, I definitely love you.” He said rubbing my back slightly.  “Where are you from?” he asked

“America.” I said. “I love you too.” I said, his cheeks flushed a little deeper at that.

“I feel like all of this is so backwards.” He laughed quietly laying his head back against the wall.

“When you have time we can go talk about whatever you want.” I said “I want to know you.” I said sounding needy again, I hated how easy it was to tell him this stuff. “I’ve spent two years only knowing you in here.” I said holding my phone up. I stretched my legs out in front of me and leaned back against the wall.

“come with me?” He said holding is hand out for me. I grabbed it, it felt like it was meant for me and only me, like I could never hold anyone else’s hand ever again. “I have the day off now.” He said laughing. We stood up and he led me out of the practice room to a stair case. I watched him as he walked up the stairs. He was so delicately beautiful. A few flights later we were on the roof, There was a bunch of lawn chairs and tables on the roof. He led me to a table that overlooked the city around us. I sat there and he sat across from me. He looked out at the world then at me. “wow.” He said. “I always wondered what it would be like.” He said. “Tell me how it went for you?” He said I explained the whole thing to him and how much it hurt me and how much I worried about him constantly and I was basically just pouring my heart and literal soul out to him and it was so easy and he looked at me with such deep expressions he was feeling everything I felt, he was real, this was real. as disorienting as it was to be here feeling all this at once It was so incredibly comforting to be near him, to be with him. He held my hand across the table, He’d bring it up to kiss it softly every now and then. I wondered if the intensity of his touch would wear off or would it always be like this. I wondered if he felt it this intensely too. “Tell me if any of this makes sense?” I said “did you feel me like they said you’re supposed to?” I said. Looking down then up at him. He looked at me his cheeks reddened.

“I felt everything.” He said “The first time it was insane, it wasn’t intense like everyone said it was.” He said “I just felt lightheaded and a little sick to my stomach.” He laughed “I thought I hadn’t eaten enough or worked too hard.” He said “it wasn’t until that night I had a dream.” He said looking at me in the eyes “I’ll never forget this first dream.” He said “I was onstage, crowd screaming, the guys around me. I slip and fall and everyone is gone, the crowd, the guys, the crew. It’s dark the lights are shining in my eyes. They couldn’t focus for a long time. Like you know when you take a picture of lights and they’re all glowy? Yeah that’s what my eyes were doing bouncing in and out of focus like that. Then I see something coming towards me from behind the light. I’m trying to hard to see what it is. Then I see, and it’s the most beautiful human in the world.” He said looking at me “I needed to get to you, I needed to be near you, I couldn’t reach you, I couldn’t move, I couldn’t yell for you to come to me. I was opening my mouth and nothing was happening. You looked so lost. So scared, So alone. It hurt me. This dream haunted me for the first little bit.” He said “Then the dreams would change. I would be walking down this dark road trying to get to you. You were always just out of reach.” He said “not matter how much I wanted to get you I couldn’t In some of the dreams you’d tease me. You’d look right at me, through me and I couldn’t do nothing about it. I’d feel so vulnerable and lost in these dreams. In others I was just desperate” he said, His ears reddening. Desperate to touch you, and hold you and kiss you and hear you and Feel you.” He said “feel this.” He said holding our hands up “and so much more.” He said My heart was steadily pounding in my ears, I wondered if he could hear it, if he could feel it. I pulled one hand free and placed it on my chest

“can you feel it?” I asked sounding a little breathless. Was this him? Or me? Are we currently feeling each other? He swallowed hard and nodded placing his hand on his chest. “will it always be like this?” I asked him. “this can’t be healthy.” I laughed.

“I don’t know.” He said laughing quietly. “Tell me about you.” He said “I want to know everything.” He said looking at me, his eyes a glow. The sun was lower in the sky but not quite setting yet. It created a good afternoon glow. I started from birth and made my way up from there. He’d laugh like I was the funniest person in the world, His laugh was the most beautiful sound I’d ever seen. Everyone I was ever attracted to in life lacked compared to him. His boyish features, His soft eyes, I’d never seen true beauty until I met him in person. Our conversation came easy. We had so much in common, our childhoods were told as if we lived down the road from each other. His stories would bounce off of mine, or mine of of his, Our lives interconnected through these innocent memories where we had no idea we’d ever meet in this way, or at all. We were both lonely teens. He often wondered if he would be able to be with his soulmate because of who he became. He wondered if I saw him at his shows and he missed me. He’d always look into the crowd at his events. He’d look around at the airport. He was constantly searching for me because he felt like he failed because he didn’t see me when I saw him. He felt like he failed as a soulmate. He felt every ounce of sadness I felt when I was longing for him. He longed for me to find me and apologize. And he did apologize and it hurt to see him think he wasn’t enough. I wasn’t sure if I should tell him of the fate I was told of for him? Was that against the rules? Were there rules? He’d hurt enough already, I didn’t dare want to hurt him more let alone live without him. It could be wrong anyway.

“you’re sad.” He said looking at me worried, I couldn’t hide nothing from him now but I’d damn sure try and hide this for the rest of my life.

“you can never fail me.” I said. “ever. I hope I never fail you.” I said. “please always be here with me.” I said as tears started welling In my eyes

“I’ll always be with you now.” He said “we’ll never be apart.” He said reaching for my hand and pulling me up and towards him. He sat me across his lap. I felt so small in his arms and safe. and scared for him in this moment. I wanted nothing more in life than to protect him forever. He held me close to him, I could hear his heartbeat syncing with mine. His hands holding on to me at my hip, My one arm wrapped around him and I leaned into him. The nape of his neck warm, I kissed his pulse point and felt is on my lips, I hoped I’d always feel it there. The tears were falling steadily now. “don’t be sad.” He said to me in the softest voice. “you’ll be okay as long as I’m here.” He said. He had no idea what he was saying and how much it really meant to me, or maybe he did. “I’ll love you forever.” He said as he turned to kiss my lips softly. My hands immediately found his hair, I ran my hands through the ends as we kissed softly. His nose bumping mine. His hands holding onto me tightly. This kiss much more innocent than our last one but still had just as much of an effect on me as the first. My stomach was in knots as I tried to stop the tears and let him comfort me. I shouldn’t be here, I shouldn’t have come. His poor soul didn’t deserve me, I didn’t deserve him. His lips meeting my lips with growing intensity, his hands gripping me tighter, My breath coming in harsh breaths now as I had stopped crying. He kissed up my cheek and down again. I leaned my forehead against his, His breath cool on my damp cheeks.

[bbyboybrock--archived]

Serendipity (C.B) | Chapter 10

Summary: Serendipity: (n) the chance occurrence of events in a beneficial way

Popular youtuber Isabella Hart, known as Bella to her audience, bends over backwards to separate her youtube life from her private life. Known for her overall clean content and her bubbly attitude, Isabella has a wild side to her that only those inside the youtube community know about. When Bella meets Colby during one of the trap house parties she finally meets someone she can be her genuine self with. When trouble arises after their meeting, will Bella be able to hand the pressure or will she destroy her relationship with Colby as well as herself in the process. [This starts in 2018]

Written: 2019

Word Count: 2,303

Warnings: swearing

Serendipity Masterlist

"Hey guys, welcome back to my channel! Today I'm going to be pranking my boyfriend, Mr. Colby Brock. For those of you who are subscribed to him, which you really should be, you might have seen a video where he pranked me a few weeks ago. It was basically him annoying me all day, but I decided to get payback. I'm going to tell him that I want to be cute and paint a sunset on his back, but then I'm going to paint something else!" I turn off the camera and begin taking everything inside.

A few weeks ago Colby thought it would be hilarious to prank me over the span of a week. Just little pranks every day when I was least expecting it. On Monday, when I was getting ready for a meeting, Colby decided to fill my hair dryer with flour. I had just gotten out of the shower so I was a tad bit annoyed. On Tuesday I was taking a nap at the trap house and Colby decided to put hot sauce in my mouth. But he accidentally put too much. Wednesday was the worst. That day Colby was at my apartment to "grab something he forgot" while I was at a photo shoot. Little did I know that he was actually setting up clocks around my room that would wake me up every 30 minutes. He wasn't even there and I don't know how he set up a camera that didn't die or run out of memory. Needless to say that I was pissed and not in the mood for Thursday's prank where he hid the raw footage for the video I needed to edit for Friday.

That day I was so tired and stressed that I actually cried. Friday he turned off the brightness on my laptop so it looked like it was dead and pretended to break it. Needless to say that he had to make up for that one because I was even more stressed than the day before. Saturday, because I thought he was done and the pranks couldn't get worse, I let Colby spend the night at my apartment the night before. I woke up the next morning to a lot of my things in jello. My phone, cameras, glasses, keys, and even my toothbrush. Luckily, he had enough sense to cover my electronics in plastic or else we would have had a real problem. On Sunday he texted me my usual good morning text and then followed with a message saying that he had a secret to tell me later. We weren't planning on seeing each other that day and I sure as hell tasing going to drive all the way to his house o find out what it was. But it was annoying so I kept texting and calling him everyone once in a while to see if he would tell me. Right before bed, he texted me saying that the secret was that he was done pranking me for a while.

At least my prank is a lot nicer than some of the pranks he pulled on me. I honestly didn't know how I was going to get him back and if I didn't see the trend of people doing the same thing online I don't think I would have had the idea to do so. I still need to think of something better but for now, this will have to do. My mentions have been flooded by fans asking me to get revenge so I know I can't, not post something. I have to also please my fans.

****

I managed to make it upstairs into Colby's room carrying all of my supplies without dropping a single thing. I dump everything onto the couch and look at Colby who is just staring at me. I asked him about doing this earlier so he isn't surprised to see me with a lot of my art supplies.

"Why do you have so much paint with you? Are you painting the fucking Mona Lisa on my back?" He sits up and looks at my box of paints.

"I brought extra just in case anyone else wanted to get painted. Help me set up the cameras?" I take my backpack off my back and take out my camera equipment. Colby takes one of my cameras and sets it up on the floor facing the door. Where it can get a time-lapse overview. I set one up where Colby's head is going to go and make sure we will be in the frame. I borrow Colby's camera so we can vlog while getting ready. I set out the tarp on the floor and turn all three cameras one. I take the shirt I packed to paint in go into Colby's closet to change. When I step out, Colby has the camera pointed at me.

"Is that my shirt?" I look down to see that I'm wearing one of Colby's old shirts.

"...No?" I take the camera from him face it towards him.

"Pretty sure it is, but okay."

"Okay babe, take off your shirt and lay on your stomach."

"Oh, kinky." Colby jokes while taking his shirt off.

"Excuse me, sir, this is a family-friendly channel."

I turn off Colby's camera and sit on his back with my paint next to me. Colby has his laptop open on Netflix so we can have something on in the background. I would have music but I don't want to risk getting demonetized. To be extra safe we are both wearing one of my AirPods. I look up a picture of Pinhead Larry on my laptop and have it open out of view from Colby. I have another window opened with a picture of a sunset just in case he peeks over.

I'm about halfway done with the painting when I hear Colby's door creak open. I look over to see Corey opening the door. He has a confused look on his face for a second. He looks at me, then Colby's back, and then at my laptop before bursting out laughing.

"What are you laughing at, brother?" Colby asks after pausing the show we were watching.

"Yeah, what's so funny about me painting a sunset on Colby's back." I glare at Corey. If he ruins my prank I actually will cut off his man-bun.

"I just thought I walked in on you two doing some weird kinky shit. She's on your back while you're shirtless and there is paint. It looks a little sus, brother." I silently thank him for not ruining it.

"Corey, this is a family-friendly channel! Everyone here is trying to get me demonetized."

Corey stays in the room a little longer while I continue to paint. He leaves before I finish. I add the finishing details before leaving Colby to dry. I threaten him so he doesn't look at his back while I leave the room with his camera. I go into each other the guys' rooms and tell them to go wait for me in the backyard. I quickly go get Colby and tell him that I'm going to surprise everyone downstairs before I show him the final product. I lead him downstairs and make the big reveal to everyone. They all start laughing which confuses Colby.

"Isabella, what did you do?" He tries to see his own back like a dog chasing its tail. Eventually, he gives up and runs inside to the 24 pee-pee room. I follow him in to get his reaction.

"Honestly, I don't even know why you would trust me with paint on your back." I giggle so much at his face.

"You know what? I'm not even mad. This is if fucking hilarious. I should have known, this has been all over social media for the past few weeks." He kisses the top of my head and I quickly end the video.

****

After we hosed Colby down so the paint wouldn't mess up the pool or the shower, I head out to lunch with Kat and Devyn. We hang out at least once a week to get away from the boys and have a bit of girl time. We use this time to talk about our boyfriends and just catch up in general. The past few weeks have been centered around Gabby. After she went back to Kansas she kind of dropped off the face of the earth. She would barely talk in our group chat and completely ignore me. She ended up taking herself out of the group chat and barely talks to any of us. Jake told us they broke up so we just took it as a sign to leave her alone for now.

"You've been silent about you and Colby. How's that going?" Devyn asks as she sips her drink.

"Oh you know, it's going well." I don't make eye contact, which makes things look bad.

"Girl, if you don't spill after Devyn and I just spilled tea about our boyfriends I'll kick you."

"Okay, okay. No need to get aggressive. Last week when I was sleeping over with Colby. We were trying to fall asleep but not asleep yet. Colby said, 'I love you' and I panicked. I pretended to be asleep and he hasn't brought it up again since." Both of them stare at me for a second before freaking out.

"Why didn't you say anything back?"

"I— Look, it's going to sound bad but I don't even know if I love him. I've never been in love so I have no idea what that even means."

"You guys have been dating for half a year, what do you mean you don't know? Colby clearly knows." Kat looks like she's about to hit me. Maybe I need some sense slapped into me.

"I know what I like about him and being with him. I like the way he scrunches his eye when he laughs. I like how prominent his dimple gets when he smiles. I mean when he really smiles, not that fake smile he does for some photos. God, I would do anything just to see him laugh and smile all day. I like the idea of being around him. Even if we're not doing anything I'm happy just to be near him. We're together so often that I'm starting to have trouble sleeping by myself. I like that no matter how we fall asleep when we wake up I'm somehow protectively tangled in him. I still get butterflies in my stomach when we hold hands. When I hear his voice my day immediately gets ten times better. I like my name and every variation of it just because of how he says it, even though it's not any different from how everyone else says it. I like falling asleep to the sound of his heartbeat and breathing because he exists. I miss him on days we're not together. We could spend the whole day together but the second one of us has to leave I miss him— I just described being in love didn't I?"

"You, my friend, are so in love it's giving me a toothache."

"She's like a baby, so confused and pure. Kat, can we adopt her?" Both Kat and Devyn clutch their hearts like I'm the most adorable thing in the area. Their reaction, and my realization, only cause me to blush.

We keep talking while we eat our food. The more we talk the more I feel bad about not telling Colby that I love him back. Maybe he knows that I was awake the whole time and I discouraged him from saying it again. Nothing has changed between us. The only person who is acting weird is me. Every moment of silence since that night causes me to sit anxiously. I keep thinking that every moment that we are doing something is the moment when Colby is going to come out and say it.

We get back to the house about an hour later. I go straight into Colby's room and jump onto his bed. After a few minutes of laying down, I sit up, look at Colby, and repeatedly smack the empty space next to me until he sits next to me.

"I have to confess something." I take Colby's hand and play with his fingers.

"What did you do now?" I know he's joking but there is a hint of concern in his voice.

"Do you remember when I spent the night here a few weeks ago?" I look up and stare into his eyes.

"You sleep here once a week. You're going to have to be more specific, Iz."

"It was the day we went to the mall."

"Yeah, I remember that day."

"Well, when we were falling asleep that night I heard you say that you love me. I panicked and pretended that I was sleeping because I didn't know how to respond." I can't read Colby's face. He looks hurt and that breaks my heart.

"So what? Do you not love me or something?"

"Are you insane? This is going to should super cliche but I didn't know how to love until I met you. I didn't realize that until Kat and Devyn pointed it out to me because I'm just that emotionally dense. Cole Robert Brock, I love you so much that it scares me." It takes Colby a few seconds to process what I said.

He's quiet and then he whispers, "I love you with every fiber in my being."

My heart skips a beat just like it did the first time he said it. We both stare at each other smiling like two goofballs for a few minutes. We decide to celebrate to moment, our little milestone, with a date later tonight.

[fathertaurus]

Kitten (part 1) - ⛈️

JAJDOSJDJSJSNZJD I’m so excited. So, if you don’t know, I originally wrote a sugar daddy! David smut and then a stripper!reader smut. I kept coming up with new ways to keep both stories going, and decided to keep going with the sugar daddy one because that one got more of a response, BUT then an idea for a scene of angst (not in this part) came to me with the reader being his sugar baby and a stripper and I decided to combine the two stories. This is the beginning, it’s very slow, nothing really happens except meeting most of the VS. as always, this is trash but I hope you guys enjoy. also s/o to that one anon that said Kitten as her stripper name cause I fuCKING CHOKED!!

“Babygirl!” Zane calls through your apartment, you hear that door slam close and footsteps coming through towards you’re living room. You pop your head around the corner seeing that Heath is with him too.

“What’s up guys?” you ask. You had given them a key to your apartment for emergencies only, but they never really used it for that.

“Wanna go to a party with us tonight?” asks Heath.

“Ugh guys, I’ve worked all week and was technically supposed to work today-”

“But you aren’t and you’re not staying in! When was the last time you partied?” Zane interrupts.

“Yesterday, when I was working! My feet hurt and I’m tired guys, maybe next time.” you whine. Both boys shake their heads and look at each other and back to you.

“You’re going, that’s final.” says Heath. He turns to your bedroom and walks in Zane following after.

“Hey! What are you doing!?” you yell, shooting up from your spot to follow them through your door.

“Looking for something for you to wear!” Zane says. They go through your clothes deciding some pieces were too revealing or not revealing enough. Heath pulls out a sheer diamond studded top gasping.

“This! You’re wearing this honey!” he shouts.

“Oh my God that would go so good with those thigh high boots I bought last week! Oh and black jeans, I can wear a fur coat, or is that extra- wait I’m not going!” you ramble. They laugh at you and Zane throws a pair of dark black jeans at you.

“Yes you are. Now get ready, we have to be there in an hour.”

You spend the next hour doing your hair and makeup, making sure you looked good, your tiredness faded away and was replaced by excitedness. You didn’t get to go out often, only really partying at the club when you were working, and you were ready to have a night with your friends and meet new people. Zane opens the bathroom door as your finished putting in some diamond studs into your ear piercing.

“I gotta pee babe.” he says and goes to the toilet. “You look good, oh my! Were you being serious about the fur coat?”

You turn back to the mirror making sure you didn’t miss a hair or anything, “I don’t know, it’s my first time meeting your friends. I don’t want to overwhelm them or make them think I’m snobbish.”

“I think you should wear it. It’s apart of your personality, and honestly they’ll probably love it.” he says finishing up and flushing the toilet, he walks to the sink and washes his hands, “Plus, imagine the type of impression you’ll make? Dripping in diamonds and wear a fur coat? A queen.”

You giggle, “Yeah I guess. Black or white?”

“Heath! Black or white coat to go with miss thangs outfit?” Zane yells, grabbing your hand and dragging you out the bathroom.

“White, it’ll give you a sense of purity. And you can yell at someone for stepping on it and make it a bigger deal.” he says. You throw your head back laughing.

“If someone steps on my coat or my shoes I’m fighting, period.” you say still laughing. You go back to your room and grab a long white fur coat from your closet, then reach under your bed for your shoe box. You slide the boots up your thigh, zip the side, repeating the action to the other side, then slip on the coat. Looking on your full length mirror you think you look extra, a diamond studded sheer shirt, white fur coat, thigh highs, and diamond covered jewelry? It’s a little much, but that’s your personality. You go to your dresser sliding on a few rings and a heavy silver necklace with diamonds glittering everywhere and walk back to your living room where Zane and Heath wait.

“Damn bitch! You look like a real rich bitch!” Heath says, making you snort.

“Is the fur real?” he asks.

“God no, I would never.” you place your hand over your heart mocking offensive. He rolls his eyes at your dramatics.

“Okay, let’s go. We’re already running late!” Zane ushers us out of my apartment. We make our way to the garage and hop into Zane’s G-Wagon.

“You gotta let me drive GiGi one day, I kinda want one.” you say.

“Oh for sure, yeah.” he says.

“I thought you wanted a Tesla?” Heath questions.

“Yeah i still do but I want to test drive one first and I don’t know if they allow that at the dealership.”

“One if our friends has a Tesla, we could ask him to let you test it out.” he says.

“You know David isn’t going to let her drive his car, he doesn’t even let us.” Zane says laughing.

“That’s because we’re boys, she’s a pretty girl. He’ll probably let her do whatever she wants just for smiling.” he says while rolling down his window and blowing vape smoke out.

“I’d do a lot more than smile to test out his car.” you say. Zane lets out a loud laugh and Heath starts choking on smoke. You guys start talking about the club and how you’re getting more tips and they talk about vlogging and their friends.

“You should pick up a Vlog camera, y/n. People would probably be interested in the daily life of a LA stripper.” says Zane.

“Oh yeah”, you snort “waking up at 1pm, eating leftovers, showering and then getting all dolled up just to sweat it all off on a pole. Real interesting.”

“Then do beauty videos, show people how to do your dramatic ass looks. You’ll put Jeffree Star and James Charles to shame.” adds Heath.

“You just should put videos up, you have such an amazing personality and people would love you. Hell our fans love when you join coffee talk!” says Zane.

“Maybe, I just don’t know where I’d begin. And then if someone finds out what club I work at then what?”

“It’s not like they could get in, most of them would probably be under age.”

“Exactly, then I’d be considered a bad role model.”

Zane looks back to you through the rearview mirror “Are you ashamed of your job?”

“No, bu-”

“Then who gives a fuck? Do YouTube if you want, we both think you should. We’ll help you pick out equipment and set up and edit. It’ll be a bonding experience!” Heath says, turning in his seat to look back at you. You throw your head back and sigh.

“I’ll think about it.” they cheer from the front and start talking about the best cameras for you to use and you roll your eyes. Minutes later you’re pulling up to a mansion, Zane parks his car on the street lined up with cars. You hop out the backseat, closing the door and straighten out your clothes. You feel the vibrations of the music as you walk around the car standing in between the two.

“Okay, if for any reason you feel uncomfortable and want to go home, tell me and we’ll go home. Don’t take drinks from strangers, don’t go anywhere with someone you don’t know. If you feel like someone is getting a little to close just punch them, if you feel like something happened to your drink but you drank it already go to the nearest room and lock yourself in and text us. If you-”

“Jesus Zane! I’m 21, and work at a freaking strip club. I’ll be fine. Since when did you become daddy bear?” you laugh.

“Actually, we prefer brother bears but whatever.” says Heath. You guys start walking towards the house and he holds the door open for you. You’re immediately engulfed in the sound and smell of the party, beer cans and red cups littering the floor and smoke coming from all directions.

“Remember what I said!” Zane leans down and shouts in your ear, you nod your head. You feel Heath’s hand snake into yours and pull you along, reaching back you grab Zane’s and pull him too. Heath’s leading you out the back door to the backyard.

“Carly said they were back here, let’s go find them and introduce you to everyone.” he shouts over the music. You start to get nervous, Zane and Heath were your only real friends in LA, all others were fake or stopped hanging out with you once they found out that you strip, you were scared that their friends weren’t going to like you and that would be it.

“Heath! Zane!” a girl shouts, you look over and see a short girl with short red hair waving you guys over. You guys make you way, the boys hugging her when you reach her.

“Carly! How are you babe?” Zane asks, moving to stand on the side of you.

“I’m good, how about you guys?”

“We’re good. Oh! This is our friend that we’re always talking about, y/n” say Heath.

She smiles at you and opens her arms for a hug you step forward and are engulfed in her embrace. “It’s so good to finally meet you! We were beginning to think you didn’t exist.” she laughs.

“It’s nice to meet you too!” you say.

“Where’s everyone else?” asks Heath.

“Oh, some are sitting over here . Others are walking around filming bits . They can never just relax, always have to have a camera attached to their hand.” she says rolling her eyes. She starts walking back towards a few people sitting on some couches, a boy with blonde hair and a nose piercing and has his arm thrown over a girl with brown hair and a nose piercing. On the opposite couch there’s a boy with dark hair and a girl with blonde hair holding hands. There’s a few other people scattered about that you recognize.

“Alright! Introductions!” shouts Zane. He starts pointing at people and naming them. “Scotty Sire, and Kristen McAtee vlog squads only functioning couple.” he points blonde boy and his girlfriend, you wave and they wave back. “That’s Todd Smith and Corinna Kopf, our very own drama series.” he points to the opposite couch, the guy flips him off and the girl waves at you. “That over there is Erin Gilfoy, her and Carly are best friends. The guy standing next to her is Alex Ernst, you probably know him as the Doritos guy.”

“The one from the vine!?” you ask.

“The one and only.” you throw your head back laughing.

“You’re friends with Doritos guy and didn’t tell me, I would have came sooner.” the rest laugh along with you.

“I don’t know where everyone else is and I’m not chasing them down looking so this is your group for the night. I’m gonna go get a drink, stay here.” Zane says and drags Heath along with him. Kristen pats the open spot next to her.

“Sit here.” she says and moves over to give you more room. You sit and smile at her in thanks.

“So how do you know Zane and Heath?” Todd asks, leaning forward.

“Oh I’m used to live nextdoor to them, one night they were like, insanely drunk, and trying to open my apartment. I was terrified at first and didn’t want to open the door but when Heath started singing some country rap song I dragged them inside and let them sleep in my living room. Been friends ever since.” They all laugh at the story finding it hilarious.

“Yeah, that sounds like them.” he says.

“Are you a YouTuber?” asks Kristen.

“Nope, I’m a stripper.” you say casually. Scott laughs loudly while Todd chokes on his sip of beer.

“I knew you had to be a stripper, that fur coat is beautiful and extra.” says Corinna as she rubs his back trying to calm him down.

“It’s not real fur, is it?” asks Kristen.

“No, it’s not. And thanks, I was going for the extra vibe tonight, hence the whole outfit.” you gesture to your necklace and shirt.

“That’s good, where’d you get it?” asks Corinna.

“This one I believe I got in London from Jakke.”

“You’ve been to London?” Scott asks and you nod. “How was it?”

“Cold and rainy.” you say laughing “but really fun. I would love to go back.” For the next few minutes you sit talking about places you’ve been and where you want to go, you learn that they’re all YouTubers and that Scott makes music and is going on tour soon. Alex and Erin join in the conversation and Zane and Heath come back with bottles of beer and a handle of vodka.

“Let’s get fucking drunk!” they screamed. The next hour and a half is full of conversation and drinking, some people leaving to dance and others coming back after getting footage for their videos. You meet Durte Dom and BigNik,Dom already trying t o make a move on you but you quickly shut him down. You were now sitting down in between Zane and Heath as Zane talks, waving his hands about wildly telling a story. Your head is resting on Heath’s shoulder, and you’re falling asleep when a boy with all black, even a black baseball cap, on and a camera in his hand walks up.

“Heath, can you come film a bit with me really quick?” he asks.

“Uh I don’t know, I think y/n is sleeping on me.” you sit up and shake your head.

“Go ahead I’ll just fall asleep on Zane.” you say.

“Actually, you wanna come film it with us? I need a girl for it.” he asks. You look up at him taking him in, he’s cute, in a dorky way.

“Are you going to pay me?” you ask and Heath chuckles.

The boy looks you up and down and scoffs “I don’t think you need me to pay you, sweetheart.”

“I might not need it, but I want it.” you stare at him and he stares at you, quirking up an eyebrow at the very obvious double meaning. You don’t know where this random burst of confidence came from. Heath clears his throat interrupting the weird staring contest.

“Let’s go so we can get you home baby girl. I think you’ve had a little too much to drink tonight.” Heath reaches for you hand and pulls you up dragging you to the front the house. It takes a few minutes for you guys to understand what to do and then a few takes to get it right. By the time you’re done Zane is walking out calling for you guys to hurry up so you can go.

You turn back to the boy. “Well I hope you got the footage you need.”

“I did, thanks. My name’s David by the way.” he looks down messing with something on the camera.

“My friends call me y/n, but the special ones call me Kitten.” you say, suddenly confident again. His head shoots up and opens his mouth and closes it again thinking of something to say, but you’re already walking away.

“See you around, David.” you call over your shoulder. You get into Zane’s car, him and Heath already inside.

“What did you say to the poor boy?” asks Zane.

“My name. And my other name.” you say looking out the window at the boy still standing dumbfounded. They both start laughing loudly and the car pulls off as you join them.

[tuba-d-toph]

Answer all 92?

Okay, sure

1:When did you lose your virginity? My 23 birthday

2: Rough sex or soft sex? I’m usually more of a softy

3: Do you have any unusual kinks/fetishes? Not that I’ve found yet

4: Weirdest place you’ve had sex? Hmm... Probably this person’s bed who didn’t know we were staying there

5: Favourite sex position? This is probably weird... But the pancake

6: Do you like to be dominant or submissive? A mix of both

7: Have you ever had any one night stands? Just one (that I’d hoped wasn’t going to be one, but oh well I guess)

8: Sex on the bed, couch or the floor? Bed normally, but also the floor if I’m trying to keep the noise down or couch if we’re feeling risky

9: Have you ever had sex in a public place? Yep, in the car at an overlook at 2 in the morning

10: Have you ever been caught masturbating? I think when I was a teenager haha

11: What does your favourite sexy underwear look like? I don’t really have a preference, whatever the lady I’m in the situation with feels great in is just fine by me

12: How often do you have sex? Not regularly, it’s been a while

13: Is there anybody right now you’d like to have sex with? Oh absolutely, but I doubt it’ll happen

14: Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex? I’ve received a lot more than I’ve given, but the person I was most involved with wasn’t that into receiving, so that’s skewed the results

15: Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you during sex? I couldn’t finish the last time I did it and I think she thought she was the problem, but it was definitely shit going on in my head

16: A song you’d listen to during hard/rough/kinky sex? I’ve never experimented here, so I’m not really sure

17: A song you’d listen to during soft/slow/passionate sex? Same as above

18: Are you into dressing up for sex? I’ve never tried it, but I wouldn’t necessarily be opposed

19: Would you prefer sex in the bath or sex in the shower? Hmm... I’ve done it in the shower, but want to try in the bath because there’d be a lot more stability

20: If you could have sex with anyone right now, who would it be? I’m not into revealing things like this, especially because they’re someone mutuals know and I wouldn’t want to out them like that

21: Have you ever had a threesome? If not, would you? I haven’t, but I’m definitely interested

22: Do you/would you use sex toys? I don’t, but there are a few I’m intrigued by

23: Have you ever sent someone a dirty text/picture? Oh definitely, more of the former over the latter

24: Would you have sex with your best friend? It’s tough to determine a best friend at this point, so I’ll leave this one up in the air

25: Is there anything you do after sex? (for example, smoke, eat, drink) Pee/take a shower, if we got hot and heavy enough

26: Something that will never fail to get you horny? Knowing someone’s mutually interested in getting intimately involved with me

27: Early morning sex or late night sex? Late night, I’m not usually an early morning person for anything haha

28: Favourite body part on the opposite sex? Hmm... Speaking sexually, it’s always a toss up between the booty and boobs

29: Favourite body part on the same sex? Ehh, n/a

30: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find: I’ve stolen a few things, oops... And a few of them being inappropriate things from people I know, so I could never let those be found

31: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you: N/a

32: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?] I mean, I made out with the last person I got a bj from after that act if that counts, it was just kinda a saltier taste haha

33: Is it ever okay to not use a condom: If you’re wanting a baby together; otherwise I’d rather stay safe and worry less about the baby thing or disease

34: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience: Another thing I’ve not thought much about

35: Worst possible time to get horny: Probably a funeral

36: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans? Oh absolutely, but it’s also super fun when you have to be super quiet in an apartment so as not to attract the attention of your roommates in the living room, and you try everything you can to get each other to make a noise anyway

37: How much fapping is too much fapping: Eh, when it hurts I guess

38: Best sexual complement you ever got: “You’re so deep, babe” I haven’t gotten much else besides that

39: Favorite foreplay activities: Teasing each other until we can’t stand it anymore

40: What do you wear to bed? Usually just underwear, sometimes nothing

41: When was the first time you masturbated: Summer of seventh grade

42: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself? Not currently

43: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside? Just the once a couple of months ago, if car sex counts

44: Have/would you ever have sex in public? Oh sure

45: Have/would you ever had a threesome? This one’s been answered

46: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate? This would kinda reveal something from question 30 and I don’t wanna

47: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not? Lesbian sometimes, I’m more into solo things though

48: Do you like oral sex? (why/why not) Oh definitely, it adds to the interest rather than just with intercourse

49: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in? Fine by me, it’s their body, not mine

50: How would you feel about taking someones virginity? If they’re comfortable with it, so am I

51: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter? Probably syrup, that sounds like a terrible idea

52: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute? Hmm, probably a prostitute, it seems like you’d have more options for choosing who you’re involved with there

53: Do you watch porn? Oh of course

54: Have you ever been called a freak? Why? Middle school was fucking awful, let’s just leave it at that

55: Do you feel comfortable going “commando”? Not usually, but I had to when I broke my leg, it was tough getting underwear over that x-fix

56: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn’t shaved their pubic hair? If was really thick, probably. I hate getting my own hair in my mouth

57: If you could give yourself head, would you? No I don’t think so

58: Booty or Boobs? Always a toss up, but if I’m really forced to choose: booty

59: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?) Not physically, but I said some inappropriate things to a couple of people outside of a relationship in high school and I’ll never be proud of that

60: If you were the other sex for a day, what are five things you would do? Think of the usual answers to this and those’ll probably be mine haha

61: have you ever watched someone masturbate? Oh yes, in a couple of situations

62: has anyone ever watched you masturbate? Same as above

63. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed? Yep, a few awkward times, and a few that played to each others advantage

64. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate) Just my hand haha

65. What is your bra/penis size? Just shy of 6″ if you must know

66. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus? N/a

67. When was the last time you masturbated? Earlier today

68. When was the last time you had sex? April 29

69. When was the last time you watched porn? A week or so ago

70. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do? I haven’t and I’m not sure when I will if ever

71. Guys:Circumsized? I am

72. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched? In a sexual situation, my thighs or knees oddly enough

73. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched? The only one I have haha

74. Girls:Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation? N/a

75. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr? Oh yes

76. When was the last time you have had a wet dream? A couple of weeks ago I think

77. Which wet dream was your favorite? The last one I had was definitely interesting, and it just happened to be about someone who doesn’t mind at all knowing (knew about this before talking to them about it haha)

78. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with? Oh definitely, there are a few

79. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with? Bonnie Wright and Maisie Williams are the first who come to mind right now

80. Favorite sexual position? Already been answered

81. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed? No

82. Are you into any BDSM? Not particularly, but I’ve never experimented

83. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why? Oh absolutely, there are quite a few and it’d take a while to get into

84. Do you like dirty talk? It depends on the situation. Definitely over text, but I get too anxious in person usually

85. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation? Quiet during both haha, much like my usual personality

86. Have you ever been interrupted during sex or masturbation? Who/what? Masturbation, yes. A roommate knocked on my door needing my attention

87. What kind of porn do you like to watch? Already been answered in a few above

88. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them? Yeah...

89. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn’t there when you needed them? A few times, but after we started having sex there wasn’t usually a night we weren’t together

90. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them? Yes just the one, and we still talk occasionally because we’re friends, but we’re becoming more distant lately

91. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial? I haven’t, but there’s someone who’s mutually interested at the moment but we’re too far apart currently to try anything

92. Ask whatever you want - N/a

[kpoptionate]

skz ➾ boyfriend!jeongin

stray kids masterlist // official masterlist

07.27.18

requested: anon: hello! could you do a boyfriend! jeongin thing? thankssss 💖

a/n: this got kinda long boiiii but thank you for requesting !!! jeongin has such a big soft spot in my heart uwu

woojin // bangchan // minho // changbin // hyunjin // jisung // felix // seungmin // jeongin

______________________________

y a n g  j e o n g i n

ghjs okay

he is literally the cutest lil bub ever

he knows you from school, he recognizes you and all

but y’all don’t talk very often

mostly bc he’s too shy bc he thinks you’re so cute and funny and !!!!

so the semester’s almost over

he really like really really wants to spend time with you during break

but ofc he’s suuuuuuuuper shy about it so his plan is to just not ask

because if you actually wanted to hang with him you’d say something, right ?

his friends are not having it tho

so these little hoes decide it’s gonna be a great idea to go talk to you for him !

“hey, y/n ! you know jeongin, right ?”

and they tell you all about how he likes you but he’s too shy to ask you out and all that good tea stuff

you tell him that hey ! you actually think jeongin’s pretty cool too !

so his friends freak out and you all plan that you’re gonna ask jeongin to hang

y’all are in the same class, so in between teachers ? you walk up to his desk and lean on your hands

“so jeongin, i was thinking maybe we could hand out this weekend or something ? i really wanna get to know you”

!!!!!

this boi !!!!!

his heart goes boom boom and his brain goes what what and his mouth goes “uhhhhhhhhhhhhh”

cause he doesn’t know what to say

his head kinda shoots up when he snaps out of it after you stare at him with a confident grin

“y-yeah, i’d love to !”

so y’all meet up at the park at like noon i almost spelled it newn smh

he gets there earlier than he was supposed to just in case

and he starts freaking out a little bit when he sees you skipping up to him with the cutest smile on your face and like the cutest outfit ever

y’all don’t do much for a bit, just kinda sit on the swings for some time, getting to know each other

it ends up with the two of you running around like children chasing each other

getting mixed reactions from the people around you

most with adoration because aw ! young love, how could one not

some with annoyance bc y’all are literally like seventeen acting like you’re five, grow up

y’all just goof around for hours

before y’all know it the sun’s setting

i really need to stop saying y’all, y’all come help me please

wiping your sweat from your foreheads and laughing, you decide to go to a little diner in town

you guys get some burgers and a big ass basket of fries to share

he really wants to do something cliché soooo

he orders a big ass milkshake too !

with two straws !

he’s lowkey kinda embarrassed about it but you giggle and say it’s cute so you guys share the milkshake even though you just got to really know each other today but it’s okay because it’s jeongin, who wouldn’t

after about another two or so hours and it’s officially dark outside he wants to hang out more but also wants you to get some rest

so you agree to let him walk you back to your place

now here’s where it gets even more cliché

when you get up to your doorstep you hold his hands in yours cue him struggling to hold in a scream and tell him that you had a great time tonight

he’s all “yeah i did too”

he really wants to ask you the big question™ but is really nervous because again, you just got to know each other today, so he keeps his mouth shut

you bid him a cute lil goodbye and kiss him on the cheek before you turn to go inside

which f l u s h e s his cheeks like you wouldn’t believe

his heart’s pounding like there’s a stereo in his chest

and at this point he’s not even thinking, his body’s moving on its own as he grabs your wrist and turns you around

cups your cheek

and s h o v e s his lips onto yours

it’s with a little more force than he had meant ? but he quickly softened it up

the kiss was kinda long, not in a bad way though

he nervously smiled into it a few seconds before he pulled away, staring into your eyes trying to hide a huge grin

“so, y/n, do you, um . . . maybe wanna go out with me ?”

of course you said yes

so you pecked his lips one last time before smiling and going inside

leaving him staring at the door dumbfounded with the biggest, cheekiest grin on his face

so

that was long, but now you two are the cutest couple ever !

veryyyyy cliché if you didn’t catch that already

probably gets you lots of cute things like flowers and stuff

if you’re lucky on your ann. he’ll get you a puppy :D

doesn’t usually buy you things, though ? he prefers showing you how much he loves you through emotions and words rather than physical items

that being said, he definitely waits months before saying i love you

mainly because he’s shy, but also because you’re probably his first real relationship and he wants to be ready, he doesn’t want to scare you off

and when he finally does, he’s not the first one to say it

again, because he’s shy

he gets really flustered when you say it first and he lets out a quiet “i love you too”

and you’re all “what i can’t hear you”

and he goes “i saiD I LOVE YOU TOO DAMMIT”

probably without the dammit bc he doesn’t come off as someone who cusses but i mean who knows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

after that expect him to say ily a million times a day

even though he still gets really red every time but it’s super cute

dates with him are small and cute

lots of ice cream dates and trips to the amusement park

probably takes you to the n. seoul tower at some point

as much as he likes going out to have fun with you, he’s also perfectly okay staying back at the dorms

like a movie’ll be playing while y’all run around and chase each other with water guns it usually ends up with both of y’all slipping and bustin your asses on the floor

afterwards you probably make like brownies or something

usually ending up not cooking anything at all because you got it all over each other or ate the batter before you could put it in the pan smh

really loves cooking with you, especially big meals for the members

speaking of the members they absolutely adore you

they think you’re just too cute !! they can really tell how happy you make jeongin he never stops talking about you, sometimes to the point where it’s annoying but it’s heartwarming either way

you’re like a little sister to them

they tease you guys a lot and take lots of pictures because what else would parents do

they’re usually of you two sleeping or cuddling

which you guys do a lotttttttttttt

cuddling can go either way with jeongin

sometimes he likes to be the big spoon, he likes the feeling of your back pressed against his chest

especially when you sit in between his legs and you lean your heads on each other’s shoulder, you playing with his fingers as his arms are draped around your waist

other times he likes to be the little spoon, he needs affection and to feel loved in order to function properly what a cute bub

loves laying his head in your lap while you play with his hair

especially late at night when you’re by yourselves in the dorm and you can talk about anything

your nights usually end up with you two like that or lying down in that one position you see in the movies a lot

where you’re opposite vertical but your heads are right beside each other and your hands folded over your stomachs

like 7L but with the L shifted upwards if any of that makes sense

anyway

y’all’ll lie like that and talk for hours about everything and nothing

it’s usually only one of you guys talking though while the other person listens

it’s mostly about your day and stuff like that, but he also isn’t afraid to talk about you guys’ future

if you’re there with him, he can’t sleep without being beside you and holding you in some way

whether it’s just lacing your fingers together or full on cuddling, he loves it

usually he likes to lie face to face because he just loves looking at you

he’ll brush your hair out of your face while whispering how beautiful you are, hoping you can’t hear it

but you do don’t tell him though, you’re gonna embarrass the poor thing

doesn’t like to fall asleep before you

so once he notices that you’re breathing’s slowed into a rhythm he’ll scoot closer to you and hold you, burying your face into his shoulder as he rests his chin on top of your head

sometimes he wakes up before you, sometimes not, depending on how much sleep he’s gotten lately or if he has to work in the morning

if he does he’ll help one of the guys make you breakfast for when you wake up

if nottttttttt

then y’all are sleeping in til dinner

you usually wake up before him and brush his hair, back admiring his features

his beautiful forehead, long eyelashes, plump lips, prominent cheekbones and jawline

like his facial structure has changed soooo much since the show like he literally looked like a baby and now he’s getting so much older looking ???

i’m telling y'all he’s gonna have one of the biggest glow ups in kpop history

like he’s so beautiful now imagine how he’s gonna be five years from now holy shit

“it’s kinda creepy to stare at people while they’re sleeping, y/n”

his voice startles you which just makes him give you a lazy smile and hug you close to him

his morning voice is also probably pretty damn woah like honestly

when he pulls you closer he’ll plant a long kiss on your forehead and y’all just sit there for a while til one of y’all has to pee and can’t hold it anymore

forehead kisses

he does that a lot

kiss your face

your cheek, temple, nose, forehead, hands, you name it

your lips as well, of course, but not as often

like i’ve said a gazillion times already, he’s shy

so unless it’s like a peck or something short and sweet, you’re not gonna get lip kisses a lot

when you do tho

it’s so sweet

he’ll gently cup your cheeks with his hands and peck your lips once or twice before giving you a longer kiss

it’s very light and cute

he’ll do that a few times before finally giving you a longer kiss

holding your face closer than before to deepen it

he tries to make it more like other people do but he’s innocent, not that it’s a problem of course

y’all probably don’t run out of breath, he doesn’t go that far

when you guys finally pull away he gives a few more playful pecks before bringing his lips to your forehead and then your nose

then pull back to look at you, presenting a cute dimpled grin from ear to ear

he’s probably embarrassed at how red he is but it’s okay because you both are and it’s cute

okay so jeongin is super super cute and sweet and adorable and loveable and ashfjkdshfs

he loves taking care of you but you have to take care of him too

he love love love love love love love love love love love loves you to the end of the galaxy and back

and isn’t afraid to show it

well he might be nervous and shy

but you get the idea

please love him as much as he does you

okay i’m done

i love you

<3

[loadingluke]

Recovery days 3,4&5 of stage one RFF phalloplasty

MONDAY 4/2

Monday was a pretty chill day. I slept quite well again, and wasn’t really disturbed besides my obs checks. Everything is going pretty well. I was feeling a little tender in the catheter area, like there was a bit of tension, but it wasn’t too bad. At this point I was rarely using my PCA, and honestly was just sick of all the wires and bits sticking out of me.

Goossen came and checked on the phallus and was happy with how it was going. He gave the all clear to get my catheter, drains and fluids removed either tonight or tomorrow morning!

Today was exciting though because it was the first time I was allowed to get out of bed post surgery! Two nurses came in and I kinda shimmied to the left side and used my left hand to push off the back of the bed (which was in an upright position). I then wiggled my legs off the side and got into somewhat of a seated position- and the nurses helped push my right side up to sit up. With my arm in all these dressings and unusable as well as the abdomen incision on my right side, it is hard to match the strength of my left needed to actually get up by myself. Once I was seated on the end of my bed, I sat a little as I was feeling a little woozy. This passed pretty quickly but I was just conscious of not rushing it. Standing up was actually not too bad, and then I took my first few steps. The nurses held my drains, catheter bag and iv machines. Since it was my first time up, they grabbed the commode chair and I sat myself down on that and they wheeled me to the bathroom. I had a bit of a sponge bath and brushed my teeth. It felt so good to clean myself up.

The nurses set up a gel cushion on the recliner so I could sit out of bed. I sat in the recliner for about an hour, and felt pretty good. Maddy and Mum came over, and we had some tea and spent some time with them. I felt a little tired after sitting for a bit. I got back into bed, and as soon as I did the physio arrived to help me walk. Worst timing 😂 I was too tired from my morning escapade to walk anymore, so she told me she’d come back in the morning. The occupational therapist made me a foam pillow with a cut out to take pressure off my groin area, to make sitting a little more comfortable.

Maddy and Mum spent time with me, I just rested and we watched a little tv. They left at about 4, as Mum had to take Maddy to the airport as she was flying back to Melbourne that evening. It was hard to say goodbye but I know it’s not for long, but I already can’t wait to see her again. I had a bit more of a nap, and then my friend Corey came to visit me. We played a card game and just hung out (thanks for stopping by 💗).

I then went to bed, and slept pretty well. I’ve been actually surprised by how well I’ve been sleeping. It’s all been pretty smooth sailing if I’m quite honest. Pain is still about 3/10, and I’ve not really needed the PCA, only one or twice all day. I’m on targin and Panadol, with endone for breakthrough pain, though I haven’t needed that. I’m also taking antibiotics.

TUESDAY 5/2

Tuesday morning. The days are passing by pretty quickly! Dr Goossen and a few other doctors came in and had a look at the phallus. Things are still looking good, blood flow and capillary refill are good and we’re all pretty happy. He gave the go ahead to get everything out. Nurses came by and removed my fluids and PCA. I then walked to the chair and the nurses came back, and then removed my catheter. It wasn’t too painful, but weird. I hate catheters, getting it out felt like I really needed to pee, even though I know that’s not actually what I needed to do. I just stayed in the chair and had some water. The drain in my abdomen was being removed later, but I had to wait until the suction had stopped so it wouldn’t be painful. The physio came back, and we had a little walk around the room and to the door. Walking is much easier today, especially without the catheter! I went back to bed, and then had the drain removed. Finally cordless! After the drain was removed, I went to the toilet and had no issues voiding. I had a wash up and brushed my teeth, and I felt sooooo goooooood. I felt so much more alert and aware, and I was just really glad to feel a little more back to normal.

I got into bed and just relaxed. Mum came by and I went and sat in the chair and we had some tea. After a few hours I hopped back into bed and mum went home for the evening. I passed my voiding trial with flying colours, I wasn’t having any issues with my bladder since the catheter removal (phew!). The only concern I had was with all the packing around my phallus, as it made it hard for me to feel like I was able to keep the area under the padding clean. This was more of an anxiety and I was doing fine, but ehh.

At about 6pm, when I started to feel very hot. I had my temp tested and it was about 37.7, a mild fever. I was stressed that I was getting an infection, and really freaked out. I wasn’t sure if the padding needed to be changed, or how everything else was going. I got myself up and had another sponge bath, and had my night antibiotic and about half an hour later I felt much better. I don’t really know what it was, but it passed. I think my anxiety around getting an infection just got the best of me. My temp was measured again and it was back down to 36.6, so crisis averted.

I got back to bed and watched some TV. Had a good sleep. Still not having too many issues sleeping, the only issue with my arm is that it has begun to itch. I’m taking it as a good thing though, as it’s a good sign that it’s healing. I scratched my elbow  and I felt a shooting sensation up my arm. It didn’t hurt, but felt real weird.

WEDNESDAY 6/2

I woke up at about 4am to a really bad pain in my leg. Turns out when I was feeling hot earlier in the night, the nurse moved my compression stockings down and they ended up doubled over! The nurse fixed them by pulling them back up, and then we were all good. I fell back to sleep at about 5am, and woke up at about 8:30am when the nurses came in for obs.

I had more targin, antibiotics and Panadol just to stay on top of the pain. Dr Goossen’s associate, Andrew? came in to check on my phallus and as per normal was happy with it all. He said Dr Goossen will be coming in to see me tomorrow.

The physio came by about half an hour later, and we had a walk to the coffee machine just to get my legs moving. I didn’t feel any pain, just slight discomfort due to my arm being so heavy. It is nice to get up and walking, giving my butt incisions a little bit of a break.

I got back into bed, and called Maddy, then I called the anaesthetist company regarding paying my anaesthetic fee. I hadn’t received his bank details and since I wasn’t leaving the hospital for a couple days I wanted to make sure I could pay it when I’m discharged via bank cheque (as my cards have limits on spending above a certain amount of money). She said all would be fine and that she put a note on my file.

I went to the bathroom and had my morning freshen up-the usual sponge bath, dry shampoo, brushing teeth etc. I can’t get over how good cleaning myself up makes me feel. I feel so much more comfortable, and every day I’m gaining more strength and it’s getting easier.

My packing around the phallus started coming a little loose on one side, and so a nurse brought some tape to put it back in place. I noticed my the dressings on the top of my butt incisions has rolled up over the incisions on one side, leaving them exposed, but when the nurse checked on them she said it shouldn’t be an issue. My butt has changed shape a bit, it looks and feels a lot flatter and I’m super stoked with it. It’s still really swollen but that definitely has been a nice perk from all of this.

Because the support has moved a little, I was able to see my whole penis for the first time today and...wow. I’m so beyond happy with how it turned out. It’s been 5 days and it’s already so worth it. It’s exactly how I hoped it would be and it’s only going to get better! I’m feeling super positive and I’m so happy I’ve had a smooth journey so far. It’s by no means easy, but so so worth all the discomfort and irritation and pain.

My hand has been doing well, my fingers feel good, I’m able to wiggle them and move them quite a bit. I’m not overdoing it though, just a little movement every few minutes or so.

Mum came over and we had some tea and Skyped my family, including my siblings. They’ve been supportive of my transition since they were told in the beginning of 2015, and at this point they often forget I have ever been anything besides their brother. Even though they don’t know what’s happening, it has been nice being able to talk to them while I’m cooped up in here.

As mum was going, Hans popped in to have a little look at how everything is going. While he was here, he put some more tape on my padding (which was in dire need of structural support). He said to not worry about the plastic butt incision covers, and that they’ll be replaced shortly anyway. I asked him about my legs and whether or not he made one or two incisions on my legs. He said he ended up going with two, as the vein he found in the right side was not very large and didn’t really have the best branching. He thought it would work, but decided bite the bullet to go in my left and ended up finding some that worked a little better. I find it interesting just how weird bodies are- it really varies for everyone because their veins are all different. I’m glad he decided to go in again, i don’t mind an extra incision if it means a better chance at good blood supply. He had a look at my phallus and was very happy. I told him how happy I was with it and he seemed touched, and we hi-fived (I love this man 😂). He said I should be able to get the dick padding off tomorrow or Friday morning, and my splint Friday morning. This means I’ll be able to leave Friday as originally planned. He said once the padding comes off, I’ll get the infamous dick donut, used to prevent kinking and to make sure it all heals up as expected. He said I’ll probably see him sometime on Tuesday following my discharge, as well as the hand therapist at some point next week. Everything is looking pretty good!

I’ve had another sponge bath and brushed my teeth, all ready to settle down for some trashy tv!

[thelattayhottay-blog]

The Girl who wanted to like Musicals

Welcome to my new fan fiction. It’s a Sequel to the guy who didn’t like Musicals. 

Be warned! There will be aggressive, adult language, violence, also there might be Things triggering you so please only read if you are consent with all of this. 

Also be Aware that this Story contains spoilers to “the guy who didn’t like Musicals” as this is a Sequel.

Now enjoy reading Chapter one.

Chapter one

“It’s been two weeks since tragedy struck our sister city of Hatchetfield. Candlelight vigils line the streets as Clivesdale citizens try to make sense of this unspeakable loss. Every last man, woman and child in Hatchetfield, gone in a blink of an eye. A meteor and a ruptured gasline was all it took to wipe them off the map. But it will take much much more to wipe them from our hearts”. Lydia turned of the radio. “Ruptured gasline my ass”, she hissed and returned to making breakfast. Ever since the tragedy in Hatchetfield happened it became the number one talked about topic everywhere in Clivesdale. While most people were sharing their fake sympathy for the many losses of Hatchetfield, Lydia was one of the few who didn’t care about them. She didn’t care about much at all, which is why she wasn’t in a good mood most of the time. But one of the few things she cared about was her daughter Vanessa, who just in that moment entered the kitchen. “Morning mum”, Vanessa said. “Any new news on what happened in Hatchetfield?”, she asked and sat down at the small rickety table. “Nope, just the usual ‘blah blah we miss our beloved sister city’ talk”. Lydia put down two mugs with hot steaming coffee. Vanessa looked at the sparsely breakfast in front of her. She looked at her mother who was nervously tapping on the side of her mug. “Mum are you alright?”, Vanessa asked while putting some butter on her bread. Lydia didn’t answer, she just stared blankly at the wall. “Mum? Is something wrong?”. Vanessa was worried. Usually her mother wasn’t like this. “What? Oh, I’m fine… I’ve just been… thinking… That’s all”, she took a sip of her coffee. It tasted horrible. The same moment Vanessa spit out her coffee. “Ew mum what the fuck? This is disgusting”, Vanessa took both of their mugs and emptied them in the sink. “I’m sorry sweety”, Lydia said while rubbing her temple. Since they ran out of coffee Vanessa put down two glasses and filled them with orange juice. “What is wrong with you? Ever since Hatchetfield happened you’re acting strange. It’s the fifth time you ruined our morning coffee and look at the breakfast. That’s just sad!”. She wasn’t wrong. The scrambled eggs were burned and had too much salt, the bacon was swimming in grease and the bread just looked sadly. “That’s it, I’m going grocery shopping today”, Vanessa said annoyed. The last two weeks she had to eat burned or frozen food, too salty or too sweet or her mother added too many spices at once. She lost at least 6lb in that time. Lydia stared at her, her voice was panicky. “You’re not leaving the house! You stay here. We can… Order food… No no… not order… Let’s see what we have left”, she stood up and opened the fridge. Inside was a box of spoiled milk, some wrinkled veggies, some sad looking cheese and the left overs of a pizza Vanessa had ordered last night because she was starving. Lydia took out the box of pizza, opened the trash can and threw it away. “Mu, NO! That was the only edible thing in this house!”, Vanessa yelled. She saved the pizza knowing the breakfast would be a disappointment. It was her favourite pizza, ham, pineapple and cheese. “No more ordering food from the outside!”. Vanessa was pissed. Tolerating her mother’s “cooking skills” was one thing. But not being allowed to finish her favourite pizza which she bought with her own money, that’s just rude. “You’re crazy!”, Vanessa yelled. Without hesitation her mother grabbed one of the mugs on the sink and threw it against Vanessa’s head. It hit her full force on the forehead. “All I’m doing is trying to protect you and that’s how you’re thanking me you crazy b*tch?”, Lydia yelled. Her eyes were red, and she was furious. Never before Vanessa had seen her mother that furious. What was going on? Pain ran through her head, starting from where the mug had hit her. The mug had fallen to the ground and shattered into million pieces. Slowly, Vanessa touched her forehead, feeling blood slowly running from the wound. “I just can’t with you right now. You’re a monster”, Vanessa said and stormed upstairs.

 Ever since she could remember her mother and her had been living in the same house, a small house at the edge of Clivesdale. Apparently, her mother lived in Hatchetfield and Vanessa was born there, but for some reasons they moved away when she was like one year old. Vanessa’s room wasn’t huge. The walls were covered in some old floral tapestry which was falling apart and since nobody cared to replace it, it looked really ugly. Vanessa would have cared to replace the walls but since she had no friends coming over, she didn’t have a reason to do so. Vanessa was a social awkward person. She never managed to find any friends or when she found nice people her mother told her to stop seeing those people. Vanessa never understood why her mother would refuse to let her find friends, but in the end, she just accepted it. She was a member of the school’s book club, but she never connected to the people there. Her clothes were spread across the floor. When was the last time she did laundry? It has been almost two years since she graduated from high school. Her mother wanted her to go to college but since they couldn’t afford it, Vanessa started working in the local book store. It was simple work. All she had to do was sort in new books, dust the shelves and tell customers where to find a certain book or show them the way to the toilet. “It’s not the ideal job, but money is money”, she had told herself on the first day of work. “Only until I find something better”, that’s what she told her mother when she started working. Now two years later she had to face reality. She would probably never find a different job again, not until she would go to college. There was a cheaper college in Hatchetfield. She would have been able to afford it while working at the book store. Also, she wouldn’t have to move there, she could’ve drove there every day by car. But as soon as she mentioned Hatchetfield to her mother, she freaked out, telling her that if she dared to enrol in Hatchetfield, she would lock her in the basement and never let her out again. Sometimes Lydia was really crazy, Vanessa thought and looked at her reflection inside her mirror. While she was running upstairs and staring through her room more blood had left the wound, covering her face with bloody streaks. “Bloody hell”, she hissed and slowly touched the wound. “Ouch”, she hissed again and walked into the bathroom across the corridor. One advantage of her bedroom was that the bathroom was on the other side of the corridor, so she wouldn’t have to run much when she had to pee or throw up after a long night of drinking with her co-workers. Touching the wound made it worse than before, she just realized. The sight on her right eye was blurry since blood kept streaming over it. How didn’t she notice all the blood before? It was just when she looked at herself in the mirror when she recognized all the blood. How long did she stare at her room to not notice? Vanessa looked at herself in the mirror. Her entire face was covered in blood and some blood had started to drip onto her yellow shirt she was wearing. Disinfect the wound was the first thing she could think about. She took a towel out of the shelf, drenched it with water and rubbed the towel over her face. That’s probably how you disinfect a face, she thought, but at least she got a better view at what was happening right now. The wound was burning and fresh blood kept running out of it. “Good job mum”, she mumbled and opened the medicine shelf. Unlike most people, Lydia and Vanessa owned a huge medicine shelf. Since Lydia worked as a doctor or nurse back in Hatchetfield, she knew what was important to have at home. And thanks to her over ambitious teacher at school Vanessa knew how to stitch a small wound. Vanessa took out some disinfection lotion, band-aids and the required tools to stitch the wound. She hesitated. She knew what she had to do, she practiced this so often. But she never thought she would actually have to do this. From downstairs she heard her angry mother, probably cleaning the kitchen and meanwhile destroying half of it. Nothing special, she thought since it happens all the time that her mother destroyed some furniture in the house. At some point they stopped caring about good replacements and just bought what was cheap and functional. Vanessa put down the tools on the sink. Blood started to drip from her chin, the blood was streaming down her face in big streams. Usually her mother wouldn’t hurt her, at least not that bad. Bruises were normal for her. Lydia always had an anger issue and Vanessa assumed it was the reason she was divorced. But she never understood why her father would have left her with her mother. All she knew was that her father was a crazy person, probably living in Hatchetfield, which meant… Vanessa shook her head. Now wasn’t the time to think about her sad family back story. Before she could start to stitch the wound, she would have to clean the face again, so she took the towel and rubbed it gently over her face. Tiny pieces of fluff got stuck on the edges of the wound. With shaky hands Vanessa took out some tweezers from the shelf and removed those pieces, trying not to poke the wound. But of course, she did, only to make everything worse. Angry she threw the tweezers against the wall. “Fucking piece of shit”, she cursed. How did Murphy’s law say? Anything that can go wrong will go wrong. Vanessa hated those phrases. She took a deep breath, then took a cotton ball and put some disinfection lotion on it. “Here goes nothing”, she said and put it on the wound. What followed was an agonizing scream, it burned like hell. She had to hold back tears, this wasn’t the time to cry. But this, she knew, was only the beginning of the trip to hell. She still had to stitch the wound. Vanessa looked around. There must be something she could bite on to prevent more screaming. Since she found nothing better she decided to take a towel. Her hands were shaking heavily, making it harder to get the needle and the string together. She took one last deep breath, then put the towel in her mouth. Whether she wanted to or not, now she had to sharpen her mind an concentrate. That’s not how she wanted to start her morning, but she had no other choice.

 30 minutes later, Vanessa had finished cleaning the bathroom. She carefully had to replace the band-aid on her forehead about five times already because it was soaking with blood. To ease down the pain she took some pain killers which soon kicked in. It probably wasn’t a good idea to take pain killers on an (almost) empty stomach, but she didn’t care. Too much had happened that morning. When she checked the time, she realized she would definitely be too late for work again. Her boss, a man in his mid-fifties didn’t like when she arrived too late. Mr. Miller was a nice man usually, but when it comes to punctuality, he had no regrets. Originally, she had planned to leave home earlier, go get something to eat at the bakery and then go to work, but since she was already twenty minutes late on her schedule, she would have to skip food. Vanessa sighed. This definitely wasn’t how she had planned this week. She was actually kinda looking forward for this weekend. Her co-worker, Miles, asked her if she wants to tag along this weekend to go to the cinema to see a movie. She hadn’t told her mother of course because she would probably refuse to let her go. Besides having friends, enjoying culture such as music or theatre was a big red flag in the Reynolds household. Every music channel on Tv was blocked, the radio had to be turned off as soon as music started playing. Her mother even edited her audiobooks and CDs so whenever music would play there was a harsh cut. Vanessa never understood why her mother was like that. Apparently, music triggered something in her past which is why she wouldn’t let Vanessa listen to it. Lydia even managed to get Vanessa out of every music related class. And since music was a banned topic in her family, Vanessa never showed interest in music. Whenever people asked her who her favourite band was or what kind of music she listens to, she always answered “You know, those who are famous right now”. This answer always counted, no one asked more questions. But it also had a good side to all of this. Since she wasn’t allowed to listen to music, Vanessa became interested in scientific audiobooks and documentaries from a young age. While others went through their boy band phases, Vanessa dived into the world of science. Her love for science helped her get good grades. Sadly, she wasn’t good enough to get a sponsorship for college, but that was alright.

When she checked time again another 15 minutes had passed. “Fuck”, she cursed and ran into her room. She still didn’t have time to change into something new. Vanessa pulled her shirt over her head and tossed it into a corner, then opened her wardrobe, hoping to find something acceptable to wear. One of her biggest weaknesses was forgetting about doing laundry. If Lydia wouldn’t remember her every now and then, she wouldn’t have nothing left to wear. At the bottom of her wardrobe she found a black dress. She usually wouldn’t wear a dress to work, but since she had nothing else to wear, she quickly changed into that dress and added a pair of black tights. When she checked her appearance in the mirror, she noticed that her dark brown hair was a mess. Quickly, she took her brush and put her hair into a bun. It didn’t make the situation better, but at least her hair wouldn’t annoy her so much. She grabbed her concealer and started applying it, when her mother suddenly slammed open the door of her bedroom. Lydia was sweating and breathing heavily. “Mum, you scared me, what is-“, Vanessa asked but Lydia interrupted her. “Listen, I’m sorry for what happened, I didn’t want to hurt you”, her voice was shaking. Something definitely was wrong. “Mum, what is going on?”, Vanessa asked and put down her makeup. Her mother was holding three bags in her hands. Two were already packed, one was empty. Lydia put down the two packed ones and threw the empty one on Vanessa’s bed. “Listen sweetie, I know you are confused. But please, pleaasee, pack some clothes, functional clothes. And hurry, we need to leave!”, Lydia said and stormed into the bathroom. Vanessa was confused. What the hell was going on? When Lydia came back, she had another bag with her, filled with what has been in the medicine shelf before. “Mum, please tell me what is going on”. It was then when she heard them for the first time. There were voices, loud voices outside the house. She heard them through the window. “Are you sure this is where you delivered yesterday?”, she heard a woman say. “Shitshitshitshitshit”, Lydia said and started to throw random clothing into the bag on Vanessa’s bag. “Don’t just stand there, help me pack!”, she yelled. “I won’t until you tell me what is going on!”. Tears started to fill up Vanessa’s eyes. It’s one thing to hurt her or destroy the inventory of their house. But never before she has seen her mother so nervous before. Lydia walked over to Vanessa and put her hands on her shoulders. “Listen sweetie. What happened in Hatchetfield wasn’t just a ruptured gasline. What happened there is coming to Clivesdale and if we don’t hurry and leave soon enough, we’ll share the same fate as the citizens of Hatchetfield”. “What-“. “Don’t interrupt me but listen, Vanessa. Your father predicted this exact scenario 30 years ago. Back then I didn’t want to believe him, I thought he was crazy. But it all adds up. Everything that happened in Hatchetfield, everything that is happening right now, it all adds up. We have to leave-NOW!”, Lydia zipped the bag and walked over to the door. “I will explain everything once we’re gone, but now we need to hur-“. A window shattered. The noises came from downstairs. First there was the shattering of the window, then there were voices. “The car is still outside, they can’t have left yet”, a male voice said. Someone was downstairs. Vanessa started to panic. “No, not now”, Lydia hissed. She looked at Vanessa. It was this moment where Lydia realized that only one of them would make it out alive. She hesitated, then she went over to Vanessa and handed her the car keys as well as the bag with her clothes, the bag with the medicine and a briefcase. “Take the car. Try to leave Clivesdale as fast as possible. You know my friend Leighton, right? He lives few miles outside from Clivesdale. You need to go to him. His address is in the car”, Lydia hugged Vanessa. “Do not stop. Don’t stop until you get to him. I filled the car yesterday, so you shouldn’t have to stop for gas”. The noises downstairs got louder. It seems like more people had entered the house. “You need to leave over the steps at the back of the house. Don’t worry about me”, Lydia gave her daughter a kiss on the cheek, knowing that it would be the last kiss she would be giving her. “Mum, what is happening?! Why do I have to leave?”, Vanessa was crying. Lydia stroke her cheek. “Now is not the time to cry. You must be brave. It will make sense as soon as you get to Leighton. One last thing”, she pointed at the briefcase. “Open it when you are out of Clivesdale, only when you’re save. It will explain everything”. The people downstairs reached the stairs, they were currently debating who should go up first. “Open it before you reach Leighton’s place. If what is happening right now already happened at his place, you will then now what to do. Just promise me that you survive”, Lydia hugged her one more time. “I love you, Vanessa. Always did and always will. And now go!”, Lydia left the room. Vanessa didn’t know what to do. It all sounded like a movie. But it was reality. She knew that if her mother was acting like this, then it must be really bad. She wiped away her tears. “Be strong”, she whispered to herself, then took the bags and left her room, walking down the corridor in order to get to the back of the house. Vanessa turned around one last time, just to see a man walking up the stairs to her mother. He was the same age as her mother she assumed but taller. Something about him felt familiar. “Hello Henry”, she heard Lydia say. “Long time no see”. More people were joining Henry. “My sweet sweet Lydia”, he said and grinned at her. “Did you really think you could escape from us? That you could stop us?”, he laughed. He had a beautiful smile, a smile she recognized. It was her own smile in some way, she thought. Lydia looked back at her one more time, signalling her that she has to hurry. “I know I can’t stop all of you. But at least I can make sure you never get her”. The last thing she saw before she ran out of the house was her mother pushing herself and all the people in front of her down the stairs.

[kylorenpunk]

Payback is a bitch. Do them all.

“itAy thanks for curing my evening boredom

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

     I think it was my friend Elli during a service project or my friend when we went to the movies (we occasionally pretend we’re a couple when we go to the movies lmao) 

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

    Shy. It was super hard to make friends during grade school. But if you put me with the right people I can be outgoing. 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

     My friend group tomorrow. I think we’re playing smash again? 4. Are you easy to get along with?

     I think so? I have no idea tbh. I know I was a bitch when I was younger though. Hopefully I don’t put off those vibes now 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

     The only time we interacted I was drunk so no lol. 6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

     Tattooed, nerdy vibes, can make me laugh, nice eyes, idk I just like guys ok7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

     HA. Nope. 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

     Romantically? or friendship? Also bold of you to assume whoever does these are straight. To answer, my friends who are all homies. 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

     Depends on the subject. I am always down to make sex jokes but don’t fucking tell me the shit you did with your SO the other night.10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

      I’m always down for deep convos tbh so I do this frequently. I think the last full length deep convo I had was with Jessica though? 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

      “LMAO” to Joey bc I rick rolled his ass. Bitch apparently I’m always texting you?   12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

       According to spotify it’s: Alexander HamiltonGoodbye Yellow Brick Road (Sara Bareilles’ cover) When I Was Your Man (Aaron Tveit’s cover) The Greatest Show The number one song is one I don’t listen to any more so I’ll replace that with the song I’m listening to “How Far I’ll Go” 

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

      God yes. That’s the BEST feeling. 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

      Not really miracles. But I do believe in luck in a sense 15. What good thing happened this summer?

      My birthday. Going to Chicago. 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

      Sure I’ll kiss my mirror again. Sorry y’all I don’t kiss and tell.17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

      Absolutely.18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

      I have had so many I don’t remember my first crush. And I know for a fact I didn’t start talking to crushes till the middle of high school19. Do you like bubble baths?

      No I hate baths. I think it’s gross. 20. Do you like your neighbors?

      I like their dogs. Especially the beautiful pit I get to dog sit 21. What are you bad habits?

      I get very nervous very easily. I’m unsure of myself. I’m also messy.22. Where would you like to travel?

      New York and Europe 23. Do you have trust issues?

      Who doesn’t? 24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

      When I go to sleep.25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

      My stomach. 26. What do you do when you wake up?

      Check my phone. It’s really bad. 27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

      Neither. I like my skin color even though I’m pale as fuck. 28. Who are you most comfortable around?

      I’ll have to say my friends Yara and Josephine. Love all my other friends and no offense to y’all I’m just really self conscious 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

      LMAO one basically did the other day. At least he regrets how he treated me. That’s some tea. 30. Do you ever want to get married?

      Hell yeah. Am I currently ready for it? Hell naw. 31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

     She’s too long. I really want to cut her but that costs money. 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

      Chris Hemsworth and Anne Hathaway. Or Vanessa Hudgens33. Spell your name with your chin.

      done. That was strange? 34. Do you play sports? What sports?

      I did soccer for one season when I was 6. I spent most of the time playing with my hair. That was the end of my athletic career. 35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

      TV bc we have netflix and hulu 36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

      Tons of times. It’s my brand. 37. What do you say during awkward silences?

      I’ve been doing shitty mouth pops recently. I also start rambling about my day.38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

      Someone that puts up with my bullshit 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

      TJ Maxx. Ulta. Target. I don’t shop often. 40. What do you want to do after high school?

      I’m outta that shit hole. Have been for 5 yrs. 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

      Of course. 42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

      I’m listening fully and don’t really have anything to contribute yet. 43. Do you smile at strangers?

      Working at a hotel has forced me to. I hate it. 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

      SPACE MOTHERFUCKERS - the ocean freaks me out45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

      Needing to pee, hunger or work 46. What are you paranoid about?

      EVERYTHING. Mainly the future tho 47. Have you ever been high?

      Nah. Not opposed to it though. 48. Have you ever been drunk?

      Yep. I get really touchy. It’s weird. 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

      Stalk people’s social medias? 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

      Grey 51. Ever wished you were someone else?

      I wish I was Vanessa Hudgens. 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

      I won’t write it here 53. Favourite makeup brand?

      NYX. Cheap and good. 54. Favourite store?

      Target 55. Favourite blog?

      My own. 56. Favourite colour?

      Pink or Green. Depends on the day.57. Favourite food? 

      Anything with pasta or rice 58. Last thing you ate?

      pasta 59. First thing you ate this morning?

      beef jerkey. I have weird cravings60. Ever won a competition? For what?

      For being the world’s most emotional bitch 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

      Hell no. Stay in school kids. 62. Been arrested? For what?

      Nope.63. Ever been in love? 

      Yep. Still don’t kiss and tell. 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

      I know I just said I don’t kiss and tell but this isn’t talking about the person. Wet. Gross. Sloppy as fuck. They were shit at kissing. 65. Are you hungry right now?

      Nah. 66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

      I have one tumblr friend. He’s a pal. 67. Facebook or Twitter?

      Twitter68. Twitter or Tumblr?

      Twitter. I’ll make one for this blog soon. 69. Are you watching tv right now?

      No I’m listening to Miss Independent by Kelly Clarkson. 70. Names of your bestfriends? 

      Kim, Michelle, Jessica71. Craving something? What?

      Nothing. 72. What colour are your towels?

      Pink and green72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

      It used to be two until I got a new giant pillow this week. 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

      I have them. I don’t sleep with them. 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

      Four. I just counted. 75. Favourite animal?

      Meerkats 76. What colour is your underwear?

      Pink. 77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

      Vanilla 78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

      Strawberry79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

      Grey and pink 80. What colour pants?

      Dark grey and green - I’m in house clothes I don’t match 81. Favourite tv show?

      Jane the Virgin 82. Favourite movie?

      Hairspray 83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

      Mean Girls. The second one was trash 84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

      Mean Girls85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

      SHE DOESN’T EVEN GO HERE 86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

      Bruce87. First person you talked to today?

      Joey?88. Last person you talked to today?

      Joey. What the hell. 89. Name a person you hate?

      Hm they don’t need their name here90. Name a person you love?

      My brother91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

      Someone from work 92. In a fight with someone?

      Nah I don’t deal with that bs 93. How many sweatpants do you have?

      None. I do leggings tho ( I think I have 7 or 8)94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

      2 hoodies 95. Last movie you watched?

      The Green Book96. Favourite actress?

      Anne Hathaway? 97. Favourite actor?

      Mark Hamill 98. Do you tan a lot?

      I burn a lot. I’m pale99. Have any pets?

       No 100. How are you feeling?

        Alright. Kinda pumped bc my fav cover of Come Together came on (from the Justice League movie)101. Do you type fast?

        Yes but this is still taking me a while to get through 102. Do you regret anything from your past?

        Hell yeah. No tea is being spilled tho103. Can you spell well?

        If I have a pen and paper I’m decent. 104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

        I miss some ppl yeah. Adulting sucks bc you can’t see everyone all the time105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

        Lol that was the only rebellious thing I would do in high school 106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

        Not that I know of? 107. Have you ever been on a horse?

        Yes I love horseback riding 108. What should you be doing?

        Studying for the GRE109. Is something irritating you right now?

        Boring drama stuff. I won’t go into details. I’ll get over it. 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

        Everyone has. 111. Do you have trust issues?

        Sis you already asked this. Yes. 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

        My mom? I was crying bc I could fit into old shirts 113. What was your childhood nickname?

        Family calls me Kari. Friends call me Rina114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

        Yep. Last month. 115. Do you play the Wii?

        We play Netflix on the wii116. Are you listening to music right now?

        “I am Woman” by Jordan Sparks 117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

        Only from a can. I hate soup. 118. Do you like Chinese food?

        Fuck me up with crab rangoons 119. Favourite book?

        Eragon120. Are you afraid of the dark?

        I don’t like not being able to see. So sure. 121. Are you mean?

        I’m a dick to those I care about. Sorry. 122. Is cheating ever okay?

        Absolutely not. Dump their ass. 123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

        Nope. 124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

        I believe in infatuation at first sight125. Do you believe in true love?

         Not sure 126. Are you currently bored?

        I was till I started this 127. What makes you happy?

        anime, superheros, nerdy shit, music and makeup 128. Would you change your name?

        No. I used to want to as a child. 129. What your zodiac sign?

        Cancer. 130. Do you like subway?

        No. It’s gross. 131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

        Politely decline132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

        Already answered. 133. Favourite lyrics right now?

        “Yoko Ono, she got that Yoko OnoYou know that shit that made John Lennon go soloKnow that shit gotta be lethalIf that pussy broke up The Beatles” - Jay Z

Murder by Justin Timberlake (Featuring Jay Z)134. Can you count to one million?

        I could. I don’t want to though.135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

        Not sure. 136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

        Closed. 137. How tall are you?

        Five foot. Three inches. 138. Curly or Straight hair?

        My hair is wavy. I like both.139. Brunette or Blonde?

        I’m a brunette140. Summer or Winter?

        summer141. Night or Day?

        day 142. Favourite month?

        october143. Are you a vegetarian?

        nope but i’ve considered. 144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

        dark chocolate. I’m old. 145. Tea or Coffee?

        tea - coffee gives me the shits 146. Was today a good day?

        It was decent. 147. Mars or Snickers?

        Mars148. What’s your favourite quote?

        “It’s not who we are underneath, it’s what we do that defines us.” - Batman Begins 149. Do you believe in ghosts?

        Yes and No150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? (via catscuddlingandyou)

         GRE prep book “Directions:” It said more but my fingers hurt from typing all day. 

[xukunstellation]

Big Bro || Lin Yanjun

Title: Big Bro Pairing: Reader x Yanjun Genre: OlderBrother!AU + slice of life) Word Count: 1483 words Summary: You and your older brother may not always get along, but you know that he’ll always have your back. Warning: mentions of cheating

A/N: This is the first time I’ve ever written a sibling au, so this is exciting! I would love to have Yanjun as an older brother tbh. Happy reading!

oof can you imagine yanjun as your older brother tho

i can only imagine he’d be two things

a blessing

and a headache lmao

onward to the fic

you and yanjun shared the typical sibling relationship 

which means constant fighting and teasing from both parties

the two of you can’t go a day without being at each other’s neck tbh

1 like = 1 prayer for your poor parents who have to go through their kids bs everyday

normal occurrences usually go like this

“yanjun don’t eat the food that’s in the fridge”

“oh, you mean the three slices of pizza on the top shelf? too late lmao”

“lin yanjun istg i will eND YOU”

or

“yo bro i need $20″

“get lost, loser. why would i give you my hard earned money?”

“oh, ig that’s fine. in that case, you wouldn’t mind if i told mom about how it was you who knocked over her favorite vase but blamed it on the cat instead, right?”

“...”

“slide in an extra $10 and i also wont tell her that it ocurred the same night you snuck out to zhangjing’s party”

“i hate you”

also let’s not forget 

“LIN YANJUN GTFO OF THE SHOWER! IT’S BEEN TWO HOURS AND I HAVE TO PEE”

ofc things weren’t always so bad

usually when hell freezes over

for example

yanjun and you had this sort of ritual where he drives you both to the nearest fast food place at two in the morning once a week

it was your way of bonding with each other and what better way to bond than over food?

yanjun was also your own personal chauffeur and drove you around his fancy motorcycle whenever you needed to get places

this idiot named his motorcycle angle angel 

in return, you often helped sneak him into the house whenever he was out longer than he was supposed to

you joked that he was going through his rebellious phase

except that it occurred 24/7 365 days a year

one time he tried to climb in through your bedroom window at 4 in the morning

you almost dialed 911 on him bc you thought he was an intruder

ffs yanjun wyd

in short, you both had your moments where you actually got along for once

unfortunately, this was not one of those times

you angrily stormed into your older brother’s room, slamming his door open as it hit the wall with a loud bang

“what the hell is your problem? can’t you knock?” yanjun glared, removing his headphones off his head

“cough it up,” you demanded, holding out your hand impatiently

“what are you even talking about?”

“my watch! the expensive silver one that dad gave me for my birthday”

“look (y/n), sorry to burst your bubble but i don’t have your watch”

you raised your voice in anger, “stop lying! i know you stole it from me after i saw you eyeing it the other day”

annoyed with the accusation, yanjun’s glare intensified and his voice yelled back even louder, “i didn’t steal anything, idiot! maybe if you learn to be more responsible, you’ll stop losing things!”

you groaned in frustration, flipping him the finger and stomping out of his room. you didn’t have time for this.

after the fight, you were running late for your date with your partner who you’ve been seeing recently

when you arrived at the restaurant, you were shocked to see your partner in the arms of another person. you watched as the two of them exchange kisses with their arms wrapped around each other

*insert ‘oh hell no’ vine here*

you marched your way over to them, picked up a glass of water and splashed it all over your partner’s face

they were obviously a v thirsty mofo

the entire restaurant went silent bc oh shiiiiiit

somebody call worldstarhiphop 

“you cheater! you make me absolutely sick. we’re over. i deserve a lot better than your sorry ass” you scowled

yaaaas you go king/queen

the entire restaurant literally broke out into applause and whistles for you

wow where can i get that kind of support

even with the cheers, you were understandably still really pissed

huffing, you walked over to the nearest bus station down the street

you cursed when you realized you had just missed your bus back home and the next one wouldn’t be for another hour

rummaging in your bag for your phone, your fingers grazed against something cool

pulling it out, you realized it was your silver watch that you had accused yanjun of stealing earlier that day

a wave of guilt washed over you

not only did you get cheated on but you felt like the world’s shittiest little sibling ever

scrolling through the contacts on your phone, your thumb hovered over yanjun’s contact name

you debated whether or not you should call him to give you a ride. both of your parents were at work and you knew he was still most likely at home at this time

but would he even pick up your call?

after a few seconds of hesitance, you settled for texting him instead

you: they cheated on me. please take me home.

honestly you didn’t expect him to text you back since he usually needed time to cool down after fighting. you mentally prepared your self for the long walk home.

to your surprise, yanjun immediately texted you back

the adopted sibling 🙄 : stay where you are. i’m coming to get you.

after texting him the details of your location, it didn’t take long for him to show up on his noble steed motorcycle. offering you a small smirk, you returning it with a small smile. he tossed you the spare helmet and you strapped it on before hopping on behind him

the two of your drove in silence but not necessarily an awkward silence. it was more so yanjun not wanting to force you to say anything until you were ready. you were also trying to wrap your mind around how hectic this day was.

“yanjun? are you still mad at me?” you asked when he stopped at a red light

“mad at you? nah. i’m over it. your ex? i’m going to kill them” he replied

you smacked his shoulder, rolling your eyes with a snort as he pretended to wince in pain “if you end up in jail, can i keep all of your things?”

“wow i go through the lengths of getting revenge on your ex for you and all you care about is keeping my things? i’m no star student but i’m pretty sure that’s not how it works”

you grinned, “in my world it does”

once he started driving again, you started to notice you both were going in the wrong direction

“hey, i know i’m not the best at directions but i’m pretty sure we just missed the turn to our house”

“that’s bc we aren’t going home. we’re gonna go to our favorite diner so you can eat your weight in food”

“i do not-- ok you know what, you got me there”

“thought so”

being the awesome older brother he was, he let you order whatever you wanted on the menu and even paid for it all. he saw you were still a little down, so he even tried to make you laugh by telling you more of his lame jokes

which honestly made you want to cry more than your break up bc his jokes were so bad

when will he ever learn tbh

“i’m sorry for accusing you of stealing my watch earlier today. you’re right, i should be more responsible with my things,” you apologized sheepishly, poking at your ice cream sundae

“don’t worry about it, kid, it happens. you’re definitely more responsible than i am. that’s for sure,” he chuckled, leaning forward to steal a scoop of your sundae

“woah buddy, hands off! you have your own!”

“yours looks better than mine!”

“we literally have the same order!”

and so you both went back to being the bickering pair of siblings we all know and love

the next time you saw your ex, you saw them freaking out from their car being towed away

was your eyes deceiving you or did you see slashed tires?

when you went to question yanjun about it, he acted as if he had no idea what you were talking about

“bro, what did you do to my ex’s car?”

“nothing you can prove”

yes you’re big brother was hella annoying

and yes he did drive you absolutely nuts

but you knew that at the end of the day

you knew that you both loved each other

you would always be there for him

and yanjun would always be there for you

fin

i dont have any brothers irl

but if i did

i wouldn’t mind him being yanjun tbh