#I want to reblog the gif version SO BADLY LOOK MAN

[soft-for-them]

My dear, tell me what’s wrong? - Humphrey Bone x plus size reader

Summary: You're just a shy Victorian ghost sad about your undead life, Humphrey is always there to listen to your worries and cheer you up. Reader being plus size is hardly mentioned but is there.

Comments and reblogs are much appreciated and help more people read my works.

A/n: This is some self indulgent stuff right here for I'm Humphrey brain rot at the moment. Also someone please make more BBC Ghosts GIFs, I need them badly.

To most the scene of Alison doing some paperwork in the living room whilst a whirlwind threatens to blow off all her hard sorted papers stacked on the table would be a supernaturally peculiar thing to see but to Alison it's yet another day in the ever so haunted Button house.

Alison barely looks up from her stack of bills as a Victorian ghost straight out of a ghost film or an episode of most haunted flurries around the room looking around for her dear friend’s detached head whilst muttering obscenities about how modern day people portray Victorian era ghosts.

“Oh, I must wear a night gown to bed to blend in with the Victorian ghosts just in case I die in my sleep.” You mock as you look around for Humphrey’s decapitated head, “Alison! I hate this!”

“Hey!” you here Humphrey call from somewhere in the room.

You stand straight up in all your white laced glory, the pure white gown you died in drowning your plush figure in a stereotypical ghostly glow.

“I don’t mean searching for your head my dear-“ you seemly float towards the sound of Humphrey’s disgruntled mutters, “-I mean I hate being in THIS for eternity.”

You tilt down in the most dramatic way as you carefully pick up Humphrey’s head. If you were alive your back would have clicked from dramatically draping yourself down and certainly if your friends from the Victorian era were in the room they’d tell you to use your knees instead of your back picking up your dear friend.

Who, cares though, you’re dead.

For a moment you pause. You're now fully back up, Humphrey’s head safely in your hands, his neck and cheeks softly being held by your dead hands, your eyes trained on his. It’s almost like you’re caressing the Tudor man’s face but alas if you move one wrong move then the head that is your friend will drop on to the floor.

Humphrey smiles up at you with a oh so soft smile.

Normally the other ghosts don’t treat his decapitated head in such nice ways. For the last hundred or so years you’ve been one of the few ghosts who’ve not used him as a make shift football.

If only he wasn’t at odds with his body, then you could hold his face in such tenderness without the threat of dropping him. Maybe he could do it back, maybe caress his thumb from your jaw to your lips like he always wants to do, maybe just maybe he could bend down or perch up (depending on the height difference) and kiss you on the lips.

Alison does not interrupt these intense interactions that normally happen between the two of you, she doesn’t move out the room to give you both space, it happens too much for he to be bothered.

To most of the other ghosts they don’t realise Humphrey and you have a close relationship, most of the ghost don’t even know you exist. Even if they did Julian would be joking about it every five minutes or Fanny would be judging you both.

Alison doesn’t know much either about the two ghost in front of her looking like an ethereal version Hamlet but what she does know is that she is routing for the two of you to get together.

At first when Alison came to Button house (and subsequently started seeing ghosts) she didn’t know you were even there, let alone that you normally walked around with the decapitated head of Humphrey.

( A high pitched sound that can only be described as an eek had left Alison’s lips as she tried to get to the kitchen for a midnight snack.

It was the first time she’d seen you, a glowing ghost wearing a flowing over the top nightgown and a slightly sad look to her face.

“You were not supposed to see me.” You had said in an anxious voice, “I- well-I was just looking for my friend, he’s called Humphrey.”

“You’re a ghost.”

You had choose to ignore that statement, both because it seemed rhetorical and you were very shy at the time, instead like you always seem to do, you had begun looking around.

 “Why haven’t I seen you before?” Alison asked.

“I like hanging out in the basement and attic.” A muffled and quiet call of the name (y/n) had been called out none other by Humphrey which had gotten you to float away, “Also I died in the garden.”)

Now that Alison knows that you reside where most of the main ghosts don’t go, that your resting place is in the plants and grass instead of the brick walls of the manor, she’s been trying to get you to introduce you to everyone.

That and she’s been trying to get you to confess to Humphrey but either one would be very nice.

Alison carries on watching the two of you lovingly look at one another.  It’s sickly sweet, so sweet until the bickering of ghosts gets closer.

Alison, like the good friend she is, finally gets up and says “I’ll short this out” before leaving the room.

You pause there like a dear in head lights as your hear Alison heard the two ghosts, the Captain and Julian you think, away from you and Humphrey. You’re still ready to bolt even when the voices fade and Humphrey tries to grab you attention.

“There’ gone now.” Humphrey whispers.

You look down at your friend worry still chiselled on your face. If a ghost could cry, then you’d be close to crying. With eyes magnified by salty water and your sweet sweet smile turning down into a soft frown Humphrey just wants to hold your face like you’re doing to him and comfort you.

“Sit (y/n).” his voice is neither harsh or demanding it is only soft and kind, if it was anyone else you’d not listen but you sit down. Paper surrounds the two of you, the spot where Alison once sat warm making you feel almost alive.

“You’ve been down all day.” Humphrey begins his voice soft as he speaks, “You don’t have to but do tell me what’s wrong?”

His head still held by your hands, his stump neck balanced on the soft curve of your thighs, Humphrey look up to you with pleading eyes.

“I-“ you pause not knowing what to really say, “-Humphrey my dear?”

You voice just a whisper graces his ears like a sweet song, if Humphrey could he would have nodded at you but instead he just whispers back a small ‘yes’.

“I-I’ve been feeling down lately. I-well-I never really had someone like you when I was alive, someone so kind and patient with me-“

Your head hangs low partly of sadness but partly to be closer to the decapitated head that is your friend.

“-I’ve been thinking a lot about my death and how sudden it was, how I never got to do many things with my life despite all I had.”

You head almost touches Humphrey’s as your voice becomes a whisper in the wind. You want to tell him everything you ever wanted to do with your life, how you wanted to get a job despite being a woman, own a fancy dress and go to a ball, even fall in love but all you are now is a woman covered in layers of unflattering white cotton with your hair a mess and feet bare forever destined to end up sleeping in the shrubbery.

You want to say that to Humphrey but instead you just press you forehead to his and sigh.

“I don’t think I ready to speak just yet my dear-“ your eyes connect with his, “-but for now I’d like to be in your company if that’s ok, I find you a comfort.”

“As do I”

Eye still connected and soft smile on each other face you peck the smallest and most chaste kiss on to Humphrey’s cheek before going back to leaning forehead to forehead, somehow there’s a subtle warmth on your undead face, Humphrey’s own face even going a bit pink.

Alison walks into you both silently looking at one another and she smiles. Without disturbing you both she sits back down and carries on with her paper work, the house quiet for just a moment more.

[wint3r-h3art]

AD Infinitum | B.B x f!Reader

Summary: It’s never been easy to watch him leave. It’s even harder to have him return to you cover in bruises and cuts. Nevertheless, you’re just glad to have him back in one piece. A snapshot into an intimate moment you share with your super soldier boyfriend.

⚠️Warning: smut with feelings, slight angst, fingering, praise kink, unprotected sex, cream pie, uses of pet names (sweetheart, doll, sweet girl)

Word count: 2.6 K

A/N: Re-uploading this because there were tons of mistake the first time around. I also fixed some word choices to. This is probably one of the first smut I wrote when I first started writing. Re-reading now, I realize I wrote smut prettier then than now ahha! No beta. I went over this a couple of more time again. If I missed anything, those mistakes are mine. If you enjoyed this, reblog and comments are greatly appreciated.

You know being with him has a price.

He told you from the very beginning of this relationship that there will be days that are more difficult than the others, and you insisted that you’ll be alright with it.

Now sitting in the living room of your shared apartment, anxiety gnaws at your very bone as you wait for Bucky to return from his mission. Despite being together for more than 3 years, it still doesn’t get any easier seeing him return to you covered in bruises and cuts. If anything, it makes goodbye even more difficult.

You get it. It’s his job. He keeps reassuring you that he’s practically indestructible, but that doesn’t mean that your heart doesn’t break every time you see chunks of bruises mar his skin.

It’s already 4:30 in the morning and you’re still sitting here in the living room, waiting for him as you’ve always done so since you moved in together.

You could have slept, but you’re too anxious.

The door knob rattles slightly as you hear the key jiggles. You hold your breath as you get up and try to help him out. Then your heart skips a beat with the door slowly open, revealing a more rough-up, tired version of your sweet man.

Bucky doesn’t necessarily look beaten up too badly, but there are definitely bruises and cuts near his lips and cheeks. Still, there’s nothing too bad that requires your attention. 

He looks dirtier though. His dark, chestnut hair looks greasier. His usual scruff now darkens, more filled in, and untrimmed.

His glacial eyes melt the moment his gaze meets yours. His stoic expression slowly cracks into a smile as he sees that you are waiting for him. Bucky drops his duffle bag and rushes toward you and scoops you into his arms.  He smells of sweat, dirt, dried blood, and gunpowder. It doesn’t matter though because you’re going to take care of him later. For now, you just want to feel him.

Bucky sighs in content as he inhales the sweet smell of lavender that reminds him that he’s home. You choke out a happy sob as you bury your face in his shoulder. Your legs wrap tightly around his waist, clinging on to him, afraid that he’s going to vanish. A soft chuckle escapes from his lips as he feels you kissing his neck. You have always told him how much you love kissing him there.

He hums softly when your lips find him. Your tongue slides into his mouth slowly, savoring his familiar taste of sweet mint. How long has it been since you last kissed him Like this? Has it been 2 months already?

His scruff scratches your skin, making your lips tingle slightly, while his gloved fingers skim over your bare thigh. Time seems to stop as your lips move slowly against him. There’s no urgency in his kiss because Bucky loves to savor this moment for as long as he can. There’s nothing he loves more than to feel loved by his favorite girl.

“I miss you, doll,” he says breathlessly when he finally tears his lips away from you. A crooked smile curves at the corner of his lips. He never fails to take your breath away by merely smiling at you. There’s something about the way his cerulean eyes seem to drown all of your sadness away.

After the blip, adjusting to the modern world has been hard for Bucky. Finding a place to call home is even harder when you don’t have anyone to go home to. After meeting you though, his life feels a bit easier, more at ease. You have shown him what unconditional love feels like, and that is not to say it lightly. You have seen him at his worst, and yet you continue to shower him with everything that you have despite your rough days too. He’s more than thankful for you, and he thanks God every night for sending you his way.

You couldn’t help but smile in return. This soft moment only reserves for you, and you are grateful that you’re the only one to see it.

“I came to you as soon as we got back. Sam may call you later,” he laughs as he settles you down on the couch. “He’s not too happy that I ditched him so suddenly.”

You laugh. “Well, I’m sure he understands.”

You watch him peel off his gear. Your breath hitches in your throat as patches of bluish-purple bruises painted his torso and back.

“Babe, what happened?”

Bucky hasn’t really paid attention to the bruises much till now. They don’t hurt anymore so he sort of forgot about it.

“Just a scratch doll. No big deal,” he tries to play it off coolly, knowing how little things like this keep you up at night.

“Bucky…” 

“Sweetheart,” he counters as he’s deliberately bending down to remove his pants. Your mouth goes dry at the sight of his bare ass. It’s always unfair how much of an effect he has on you. Bucky doesn’t try to hide the smile as he feels you eyeing him hungrily.

“I’ll go turn on the shower,” you clear your throat before you quickly go into the bathroom, trying to escape the little trap he sets up for you.

You turn on the shower till the steam begins fogging up the mirror. Bucky adores the scalding hot water. You figure it was because of those years he spent in cryosleep, he needs something to not remind him of the cold, desolate part of his life.

Bucky quietly goes into the shower while you gather up his dirty clothes and place them in the hamper. Then you go into the bedroom and pick out his sweatpants and t-shirt from the dresser, laying them out on the mattress for him.

Your bedroom door creaks open as Bucky quietly crosses over the threshold. His hair is still wet, clinging to his damp body. The towel hangs low on his hips just below Adonis’s belt. Beads of water roll down his taut stomach as he silently dries off his hair with another towel in hand. You usher him to sit down on the bed and offer to help. He refuses at first, but you win in the end.

You feel his flesh fingers trace your bare thigh up and down lazily. He hums softly the way your skin feels against his rough fingers. The gesture makes you ache for him.

“Soft,” he murmurs, drawing goosebumps on your skin. You breathe heavily at the way he touches you. His fingers slide upward till he’s only a few inches away from your now aching center. You try very hard to concentrate on your task, but Bucky obviously has another plan for you.

“Miss you,” he says again and he pulls your pajama top off of you to place soft kisses on your soft stomach. He hums softly at the way your softness feels against his lips. You can only reply with another shaky breath as he pulls your pajama shorts down to your ankle. You hold your breath as you watch him kiss his way from your stomach down to your hip bone. Your body shudders slightly at the way he occasionally licks you here and there as if he has been waiting for so long to do this to you. You shudder in his arms when you feel his tongue swipes so dangerously close to your aching center, wishing that he would stop teasing you.

“What’s the matter, doll?” he drawls as he traces fingers over your slit. You whimper softly as you find yourself clutching his shoulder for support. Bucky smirks as he continues to lazily slide his fingers back and forth over your opening, coating his digits with your slick.

“Nothing,” is all you manage to say. Bucky smiles, clearly enjoying your reaction to his touch

“I barely do anything to you.”

You let out a soft sob when he dips his fingers inside you, slowly pumping them in and out of you. You can hear him hiss softly and commenting about how tight you feel against his fingers.

“Fuck, you’re so wet for me, baby. Is this what you want?”

You nod your head quickly but he cups your face with his vibranium hand and makes you look at him in the eyes.

“Sweetheart, what did I say about this? You have to answer me in words when I ask you a question.”

You whimper and manage to utter the word ‘yes’ out loud.

“That’s better. I know you’re such a sweet girl for me,” he coos softly.

His mouth moves to your breast, his tongue flickers over your taut nipple while his thumb presses against your small bundle of nerves and circles it. Jolts of pleasure coursing through you.

“Bucky,” you moan softly as you claw at his skin, eliciting a low moan from him.

He looks up with a smirk on his face as he continues with his pace. He watches you with satisfaction whenever your face scrunches up when he hits that one spongy spot. Taking a hint, he continues to pump his fingers until he can feel your wall clenches up against his digits.

“Oh fuck, please don’t stop,” you whimper softly as Bucky continues with his relentless pace.

It’s not long when your release comes crashing down on you, making your body spasms and convulses around him. Bucky smirks as he removes his fingers from you

You moan at that and he smirks.

“I love the way you feel,” he mumbles as he pulls you down and rolls you onto your back, his mouth crashes into yours, drinking away your moan. He flushes against you as he yanks the towel around his waist and throws it onto the floor. You can feel the tip of his cock brushing against your aching center. He’s already hard and heavy. He’s more than ready for your welcoming heat.

His first instinct is to plunge deeply as he can into warm, tight, pussy and remain inside just to simply feel your wall clenched tightly against him. Call him crazy, but he doesn’t mind at all spending his entire morning just being surrounded by your warmness.

But another part of him also want to take you roughly because there’s nothing he loves more that watch you scream his name with he’s deep inside you.

You watch him with hooded eyes as he lazily grinds himself against your slit. Biting your lips, you lower your hand and wrap your fingers around him.

He’s hard and heavy in your palm, hard and soft at the same time. The skin is soft, almost velvety-like, encasing the stiff, core-like iron. He moans deep in his chest, the vibration reverberating in his chest as you stroke him oh so torturously slow. Your touch is gentle, yet you manage to drive him mad.

He lets out a low, deep sound as if he’s in pain, but it’s far from it. Feeling bolder, you gently squeeze him. You can tell that Bucky loves it by the way he exhales sharply through his nose, and the way he bites his lips, trying to stifle that delicious moan that threatens to escape from those lushes lips.

“Don’t stop,” he manages to murmur. You squeeze him tighter in your fingers and pull at him a little. A few drops of wetness leak from the slit of the pink bulbous head. He slowly moves his hips forward, grinding himself against your palm. His eyes flutter, lips part, savoring the delicious friction.

“Oh fuck, baby. I want to fuck you’re so bad.”

You bite your lips as you feel yourself getting wetter. It’s almost rare to hear him say such crude things out loud. He has always been sweet and loving to you, but God sometimes you want him to talk dirty to you.

“I’m not stopping you.”

And just like that, Bucky pins your arms over your head. He holds both of your wrists with his vibranium hand. You’re not even bother to struggle as they rest lightly in his grip. You know you can easily pull them away if you want it.

Bucky moves to spread your thighs apart with his knees. Then he grasps his erection and slides it up and down your slit, coating it with your essence. You shudder as you strain against his grasp, trying to feel the delicious friction he created, but you make no move to pull yourself away from him.

“Bucky, please,” you beg softly.

“Please what, sweetheart?” he smirks as he continues to tease you.

“Please take me,” you bite your lips as you look at him.

It feels like ages, but he finally positions himself against your opening and pushes forward, entering you just enough that you can feel the head fit snugly inside your throbbing pussy.

Your face instinctively scrunches up as your nails dig into your skin. A soft moan escapes from your lips as he pushes further into you, gaining another few inches. You buck your hips forward, silently pleading for more, and Bucky is more than happy to comply.

In one smooth motion, his hips surge forward as he buries himself to the hilt. You cry out in pleasure as he finally gives you what you wanted. Bucky’s movement is slow and deliberate at first, but he quickly gets impatient when you wrap your legs around his waist, and pull him closer to you. You can feel every twitch of muscles, coiling and bunching from his erratic movements.

You wound your arms around his neck, your lips find his shoulders as he rocks into you deeper and faster. The familiar coil in the pit of your stomach tightens as you feel your release getting close. Your wall slowly starts to tighten around him.

Bucky grunts as he closes his eyes and drives into you harder and faster.The overwhelming feeling starts bubbling up till it becomes overflowing. And just like that, the coil snaps and you find your release. Your body spasms as you clenched tightly around him. Bucky grunts as he finds him not too long after.

Bucky holds you tightly as his body rides the wave of pleasure. He finally relaxes after he finds his bearings and rolls over to lay next to you.

“I love you, sweet girl,” he says breathlessly when he turns to look at you. You’re still lost in daze of course that all you can do is smile and roll onto your side. You can feel the remnants of your releases rolling down your thighs and you grimace.

Bucky chuckles as he gets up and grabs a couple of tissues on the nightstand and gently wipes it away. Knowing how much you hate messes though, he goes into the bathroom and turns on the shower for you. Both of you shower quietly as you both are still spent and tired.

It doesn’t take long for you to fall asleep though. Bucky rubs your back slowly as he listens to your steading breathing. Of course it’s hard for him to fall asleep now, considering the fact that tomorrow will be a big day for both of you.

Tomorrow will be the day, he muses anxiously at the prospect. After being together for more than 3 years, it only makes sense for him to seize the opportunity and do it.

The ring has been purchased for a while now, and he has been hiding it in his duffle bag. It’s stupid, and he knows it too. Sam has yelled at him for taking such an expensive thing with him on a mission, but what can he do when he fears that you might find out before he has gotten a chance to even ask you?

Bucky just wants everything to be perfect for his perfect girl because he knows he wants nothing more than to spend the rest of his life with you.

[sonicasura]

(Making this a post instead of reblogging cause I got a LOT to say.)

As a Sonic fan and has Sonic Unleashed listed as their favorite game, YES. Since Sonic Prime is delving into the multiverse genre, it would make sense to use a Sonic that has the Werehog transformation. (I do have my own versions of the Werehog but that'll be saved for an actual AU.)

So, shenanigans happen causing Sonic to end up in Ordon Forest sometime after the events of Twilight Princess. Yep! The Blue Blur and his nighttime persona is gonna become a cryptid for awhile. I believe 'Azure Hound' would be a nice name.

This mainly stems from the fact Sonic is impossible to spot during the daytime but at night, the Werehog looks like an unidentified canine which is only added onto by the darkness. Now Twilight won't investigate for awhile since this cryptid hasn't really hurt anyone much less might be real.

That is until one of the kids in the village goes missing. Apparently a few children snuck out to go cryptid hunting only for something to go wrong as their bud got left behind in the process. Enough to solicit the hero to go on an 'Azure Hound' hunt.

Twilight manages to find the kid being chased by monsters. One goes to attack only for Sonic the Werehog to intercept it. It becomes clear that the Azure Hound is outnumbered so Link goes into help. They managed to defeat all the monsters but the Werehog gets badly injured taking a surprise blow for Twilight.

Link takes both Sonic and the kid back to Ordon Village where the child explains that the Werehog kept them safe until they could return home. It doesn't take long for Sonic to switch back to his normal hedgehog self or for Twilight to sense the wolf like traits either.

So instant papa wolf as Link cares for the wounded Blue Blur. Really doesn't take long until Twilight manages to get some adoption papers and Sonic to get settled in. Also father-son wolf style bonding.

The Werehog has a tendency to howl, can easily run on all fours like a wolf, and enough canine instincts to boot. (Literally has an idle animation where he sits on all fours and scratches himself with his foot.) Only makes sense for Twilight to shift into wolf form more often. Although the look on his face would be funny when Sonic shows off the full extent of the Werehog's elastic arms alongside strength.

Then the Chain show up one day to recruit Twilight. I'm also doing this out of order as this Link joins before Wild but not anyone else. None of the Links realized that they'll be getting a non-Link member much less one like Sonic.

Plus when Wild later joins, our Werehog By Night will be throwing in this comment. "Looks like Wolf Pops might be adding another pup to the pack." Incoming chaotic sibling bonding as BOTW Link is just a feral gremlin with enough little shit energy to match.

Twilight is also more bold since he isn't too shy of revealing that he's Wolfie unlike in canon. Sonic's confidence rubbed off on him as he really doesn't see their lupine forms negatively. It's still them after all.

Sonic: So what if you can turn into a wolf and I can turn into werehog? You are still Link as I'm still Sonic. Let people say what they want since it'll make it funner to prove them wrong.

Twilight: *completely moved and fully proud of his fuzzy blue son* You're such a good pup.

Plus there's more people in the found family alongside another person to jokingly call Time an old man. Well, Sonic would affectionately call him an old 'Fossil' since Twilight calls the older Link Ancestor. The hedgehog is a little shit, what do you expect?

Although Time would call Sonic 'hoglet' since that is the name for baby hedgehogs after all. Both are gonna be teasing each other to the point the Hero of Time feels more like his younger child self. Overall, this spiky hero is gonna bring some much needed positivity for the Chain.

If Midna could visit or join Twilight's adventures then she'll definitely take the role of chaotic mom figure with Sonic. These two would be crafting mischief together in seconds with Wild and Wind also joining. Poor wolf dad is practically impulse control cause someone is going to set something on fire with Midna around. Although Twilight might end up joining and turn that fire into an explosion.

That's all I got for now! Until next time folks, I'll see you back in Hyrule.

@hermitdrabbles56

More info

Team Sonic

[lonleywriters-blog]

Yan Gotham (whoever you feel like) with a reckless s/o who is obsessed with dealing out vigilante justice or committing the occasional crime.

Their S/O is reckless and gets hurt often, and it’s their version of self harming. Because it doesn’t count if you’re technically not hurting yourself, right?

How would they react when they realize why their s/o is reckless?

Omg yesss

Yan. Gotham with reckless reader

Pls don't reblog or take

He would realize that you go out and do vigilante stuff quite often. He didn't think anything of it at first because he spends a lot of time doing his profession. He sees how badly you get hurt and he doesn't like it but trys to be a little lenient. He decided that he wanted to watch you for a few days to see what it's like. He is instantly worried because he sees that you purposely let them hurt you before you finish the job. He quickly realizes that this is your form of self harm. He acts fast and the next day he tells you that you can't fight anymore. He doesn't care how mad you get. He price is best to ease you out of your bad habit. He cares so much and hates seeing you so broken.

He would know that you like the fact that you get hurt very fast. You go out every night and come back bloody and bruised. He can tell because you don't even flinch when they hit you. He is worried and doesn't want to see you getting killed or worse so he trys to talk to you about it. If you decline him and continue what you've been doing he will snap. He will use force, only because he loves you of course. He will lock you up in a nice house you share. I doubt he will ever let you out put if he trust you enough you might have a chance.

He would put two and two together pretty fast. He knows the signs for many things, he could easily tell what you were doing. He hates it, every thing about it makes him sad. You do it to hurt yourself on purpose and the thugs get away with thinking your weak and their stronger, and it pisses him off. He will be subtle about his worry at first. He would try to naturally get you out of the habit by distracting you. Eventually he will try to talk to you about it. He can not handle you being hurt and will go to any force to stop you.

He would take a while to notice something was wrong. He would always watch over you when you fight. He soon realized that you LET them hit you, you enjoy it even. He is a very worried man, he thinks about the smug look the person has when they hit you. It gets his adrenaline pumping. He sets up a very nice dinner for the two of you for the evening. He sits you down gently and gives you a kiss. He sits himself down and you both start eating. I'm middle of the dinner he grabs your had and tells you that you need to talk. He begs you to stop being reckless and fighting. If you decline he with simply shake his head and hipnotize you to go to sleep. He didn't want it to get to this, he didn't want to hipnotize you. When you wake up he apologizes and tells you it was for your own good. You are now stuck in a very nice safe house. It has anything you could ever want besides the outside world.

[bowieandqueen11]

Remember When / Hargreeves Imagine

Request: Love ur writing btw!! I have a Great idea for a Diego fic! Can u do his siblings somehow finding tapes/videos from the mental asylum Diego was in and seeing how badly he was tortured and abused. Then he has a panic attack or something at the end and they comfort him. 

I-ugh anon omg - my heart <3

Warning, some strong language, and also some descriptions of abuse, so please don’t read if it will make you uncomfortable!

Comments and reblogs are so so so appreciated, as this took me honestly way to long XD! Thank you!!

‘Way to go. Real Team Zero back there.’

‘Diego, we’ve already been through this. Dad’s a stubborn prick, as he has been, all our sad lives, yada yada, we’re sorry, okay? We should have known he’d still be the same condescending asshole’, Klaus replies, waving his hands in the air as he climbs the stairs back up to Elliot’s apartment. Rubbing his left eye with his hello tattoo, he uses his right to try and fumble a blunt out of his pocket, clenching it between his teeth. As he feels Luther’s footsteps pound up the rest of the way and jog past him to the landing, he can’t quite seem to light it - his fingers are still trembling too hard from the pain of Ben stealing his body in the way he did.

Running up the stairs after him, Diego leaves behind the rest of his shell shocked siblings. Instead he focuses on tucking in the corners of his shirt back into his pants, trying to do anything to stop himself focusing on Reginald and the tears that still threaten to prick at the corner of his eyes. He doesn’t even notice when he walks head first into Klaus, until he has put a hand out and gripped onto his shoulder to stop them both from tumbling back down the stairs like bowling balls and straight into Allison.

‘You, brother, are an idiot. And a fat lot of help’, he smirks, sadly, gently slapping Klaus on his cheek.

‘Rude’, Klaus shrugs, winding his way towards the kitchen and kicking off his shoes in the process, looking for some Vodka to steal.

Allison hops quickly out of the way of the incoming shoes, used to his antics by now, and instead comes to settle next to where Vanya has plodded herself down on the sofa. Fiddling with her oversized jumper, a far away look on her face, Allison places a comforting hand on her bicep and gives her a sorrowful smile.

‘What do we do now?’, Vanya murmurs out as Luther squirms uncomfortably on one of Elliott’s wooden chairs. He ignores the beeping of the machines behind his head, instead swallowing thickly.

‘We, uh... wait for Five, I guess.’

‘No no no, right now, the most important thing we can do to try and change the world, is save JFK.’

‘Ughh we’ve been through this a million times! That’s not how it works Diego!’, Klaus calls from the kitchen, only a cloud of smoke trailing out from behind the wall and filling the room with both a stagnant smell of weed, and a light fog that seems to dampen the small amount of sunlight filtering through the askew blinds, which Elliott had been taking photos through earlier this morning.

‘Look, I get that you’re on some big crusade to prove something to dad, but this is not helpful right now.’

‘We all need to stick together and stop this thing’, Allison chimes in, desperation in her voice.

Luther’s interrupted from his continuing thoughts by a small squeak out of Vanya, following her eyes from where they are trained to a spot on the rug.

‘Oh my god... is that blood? Is someone bleeding?’

‘Holy shit.’

He gets up then, following the trail, beckoning his sisters to stay behind him with his hands until he reaches the dentistry chair at the edge of the landing, grimacing slightly as he turns to swivel it towards him with a squeak. He feels Klaus bump into one side of him, and Diego hit onto his other elbow, a rusty kitchen knife raised and ready, and a look of almost determination on his face, as if he had just been waiting for something awful to happen, just another chain of bad events so he knew his life was back onto its normal tracks.

‘Oh noooo’, Klaus groans, cupping his hands over his mouth as Elliott’s body turns to face them, a knife planted firmly in his eye.

Turning away from the tortured body of his friend, Diego swallows thickly, dropping his knife to the floor and placing an arm over his stomach. None of his siblings really notice, all of them looking over the dead body aghast, wondering, pained that they were the ones who caused something like this. None of them noticed the shake in his hand as he squeezed his eyes shut, forcing the bile back down his throat again. 

Klaus, however, did notice something. However, sadly for Diego, it was not the right thing - not the signs of shock, anxiety, or guilt that flashed over his brother’s face - the signs of PTSD he would have been the most adapt at noticing in the room. No, instead Klaus looked past poor Elliot’s head, towards a blinking static screen that kept flashing blue and black on a nearby desk, left abandoned underneath the shutter shots of the rest of them by Five.

‘Hello there, what might you be?’

Leaving the rest of them, he fumbled with the buttons on the old TV, trying to shake it out of his head how eerily familiar this seemed to dear old dad’s surveillance system. Hitting any button he can find in vain, he throws his blunt out of his mouth and flicks it across the room, slamming the control panel with the fist of his palm, until his pointer finger somehow managed to falter and hit play on the tape left inside.

Never before had Klaus noticed how much time is like water, that it can drip by in front of his eyes so slowly, or even freeze with each new frame. The past few minutes had passed by as if he had watched a thousand frames per second, too slow to be normal, so unusual. He turns to try and point to his siblings, but his jaw is still so slack and he finds he can’t move his fingers properly. Shock, that’s what they call it, shock, he thinks to himself, fighting to get his words out so they don’t trail out.

There is a sadness in his eyes, the glass green too glossy when he finally turns to his siblings and manages only to feebly point at the screen.

For the first time, since his mouth had been wired shut as a teenager, Klaus was at a loss of words.

This grabbed the attention of his siblings, who crowded over to join him and peer intently at the screen - all except foe Diego, who stayed hovering at the edge of the group.

The screen lights up again, showing an empty room, one without proper handles, only sheets of smooth metal as makeshift windows for staff to peer through. There’s no bed, no mattress on the cold floor, just emptiness, isolation, silence, for the man who sits in the centre of the floor in pure white. They recognise from the shaggy hair and the wild beard that it’s there brother almost immediately.

'You were in an Asylum? What for?’, Vanya asks.

‘For trying to save the President’, Diego manages to mutter, unable to look any of them in the eye. ‘For doing what needed to be done.’

He’s interrupted by himself, the small version of him on the tape muttering to himself, rocking back and forth. ‘I am not enough, I can’t do it, I’m not good enough. You’ll never be number one, never.’  

The door swings open then. In his intense silence, Diego somehow screamed with his whole body. The eyes wide with horror, the mouth rigid and open, his chalky face gaunt and immobile as the doctor approached him with the needle.  

‘Please! Not the needle!’, he begs and cries. ‘Please!’

Luther’s the first to turn round and look at his brother. The first to finally look, to finally see him, how defeated he looks, for the first time since they all landed in that alleyway.  It's the look that he gives Diego. Those pale blue eyes, probing into his soul, desperately wanting to see what's going on in there. That look, it just tore Diego apart, piece by piece, and although it wasn’t his fault, he found himself deeply unsettled, deeply angry at him, at all of them, so suddenly.

‘W-w-what? What are you looking at a-a-ss-’

An invisible hand clasps over his mouth and stops his words from escaping, an equally ghostly hypodermic of adrenaline piercing his heart, making it contort and expand until it feels just about ready to burst. His ribs heave uneasily, and Allison’s afraid he’s about to pass out, Klaus rushing forward, biting his lips. Diego only wants to run, but needs to freeze. All he can do, instead, is fall to his knees, and allow four pairs of hands to catch him before his face hits the floor.

A single tear slides down from his warm, butterscotch eyes, followed by another one, and another one, until soon, a steady stream of salty tears flowed it's way down his cheek, releasing the sadness and sorrow that has been held inside of him for all this time but still he did not make a sound. His siblings made the noise for him, warm, comforting little nothings, telling him it was going to be okay, he didn’t have to go back, they were going to do it, save the world. Save themselves.

The hand appeared from nowhere and tightened on his wrist, white knuckled, strong, until Luther had pulled him against his chest, and the others had gently fallen to their knees too and placed their arms around his back as best as they could. Klaus was half leaning over Allison’s leg, and Vanya in turn was completely squished, face first, against his chest, but somehow they made it work.

There is the hug of gentle arms that still gives you the space to breathe, like the ones Grace used to give Diego after a mission. Shutting his eyes, he realises he isn’t used to this type, the kind of hug with strong arms that tells everything that your are - body, brain and soul - that they are with you. 

They stay like that for a while, the five - well, the six of them, as Ben places his arms around his siblings as well, even if they can’t feel him. The six of them, battered, afraid, neglected, and yet, not alone. They huddle there together, embracing each other and crying and just allowing themselves to be open, to be vulnerable with each other, to realise their dad wasn’t there and they didn’t have to go through this alone anymore. 

Tears were wiped and sobbing laughs were shared, and even Five, when he blipped back into the room, saw the set of his siblings hugging on the floor and felt a pang of loneliness and love for his crazy family ring out in his heart that he joined them, if only for a second.

From then they weren’t numbers anymore. They weren’t even siblings. They were more, Diego said with a smile. They were Team Zero.

[pennylaneforthoughts]

I posted 1,958 times in 2021

36 posts created (2%)

1922 posts reblogged (98%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 53.4 posts.

I added 2,141 tags in 2021

#mobius - 527 posts

#loki - 489 posts

#lokius - 432 posts

#owen wilson - 307 posts

#video - 173 posts

#loki 2021 - 76 posts

#mobius my beloved - 41 posts

#lmaooooo - 38 posts

#sylvie - 30 posts

#lmaooooooooo - 28 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#look i've thought way too hard about this and i just need a slytherin mobius who subverts everyone's expectations about what a slytherin is

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Omg could you IMAGINE if in season 2 we get Mobius' backstory and he's like. a jet ski beach dude and here's the important part:

He's got the classic fluffy blond Owen Wilson hair

We see him coming out of the water all suntanned and gorgeous and he does the hair flip!!!! And Loki just immediately short circuits bc hes TOO HOT!

COULD YOU IMAGINE!!!!!!

185 notes • Posted 2021-08-31 15:20:08 GMT

#4

Wow after reading this Esquire article today, I am absolutely convinced that Owen Wilson is either:

a) an immortal born in 12th century Ireland

b) a fae being

c) actually, literally, just the real trickster god Loki

I feel like my whole sense of reality has just shifted to the left a little bit. I don't know how it's possible for one man to exude so much magical realism, but I felt like I was reading a modern version of The Great Gatsby but combined with Everything I Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten and "A Very Old Man with Enormous Wings," and now I've got goosebumps and a chill running down my spine. I'm both fascinated and deeply unnerved.

Some highlights that really drove this energy home:

"He’s fifty-two. His skin is tanned and healthy—ruddy—and he has enviable blond hair that always looks like he went swimming in the ocean a half hour ago and it dried in the sun, annoyingly perfect. The blue eyes are as blue as they are in the movies, or bluer."

"He asks questions. He is well-read. Very well-read. We parse the divergent narrative styles of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn. He tells me about a book his brother Luke gave him recently: a biography of an obscure Swiss writer named Robert Walser. He mentions picking up a copy of The Snow Leopard not long ago, a book he says means a lot to him."

"The smiling blue eyes, fixed on me. You heard me.

'Do you think you could beat me in a race?'"

“Yeah, well, my brothers would say I make up rules.”

"Owen can seem like a man who’s rolling through life, as if he stumbled along from a previous century and will eventually wander off down the road, into the future."

"A butterfly carries his words off into the flowers of a nearby jacaranda tree, and he looks up and says, 'How’s our line doing?'"

"Several times, Owen has used the term “magical realism,” a literary genre in which the writer writes something unreal, or surreal, as if it were absolutely real. Owen seems to be always in search of making reality appear magical. Or making the magic of life more real. Or something."

“As a kid, there’s a lot of things that you think about,” he says. “Death—that kind of landed with me when I was about eleven. And I don’t remember ever talking with my parents about it. Although I do remember one time saying to my dad—and I remember exactly where in the house—saying, ‘I worry about dying,’ and seeing my dad turn away and catch himself. And I was surprised to see that reaction. But who knows, maybe that was part of why I said it.”

“We’re not in the same place we were when we sat down.”

"Owen is after something else, something more fascinating, or fun. Something different, and yet something that’s a thousand years old."

"Maybe it’s like the Aztecs say: “We come only to sleep / Only to dream / It is not true, it is not true / That we come to live on this earth” [beat] And stay hydrated!!!"

I've never seen anyone more encapsulate the emotion of awe, and never before have I so badly wanted to write a magical realism short story than at this very moment.

298 notes • Posted 2021-08-19 00:17:21 GMT

#3

Did I hyperfixate on the Loki soundtrack for the past three hours? Yes. Do I have some Lokius insights? Possibly. Am I going to rant? Also yes.

I preface all of this by saying I am in no way a professional. I simply have ears.

So this guy Christopher Bill on YouTube did a series on the leitmotifs and associated meanings in the Loki soundtrack, and it's very good and on point, and he even does an interview with Natalie Holt on it.

However, he doesn't go over everything, so I'm here to add some thoughts based on the things he identified there in the series.

Important notes for people who don't wanna go and watch all three hours of videos:

1.) Loki's theme is, obviously, the Green Theme as shown in the soundtrack. That melody is specifically his and shows up whenever he's the focus of a scene. Also important: Loki is associated with a grand orchestra, brass and strings.

2.) Mobius' theme does not have a track all to itself, but it is prevalent throughout the series and has two parts: a.) there is one specific instrument associated with him: a delay guitar, and b.) the little melody that goes like this:

The "Lokius" track is very interesting because it doesn't contain these two leitmotifs, which is normally what we expect in a song that is meant to be the combination of two characters. It's especially interesting because Natalie does combine themes like we'd expect in other parts of the score. We hear it twice for Loki and Sylvie's themes, both of which are during their two fight scenes. And we hear it for Loki and Mobius in episode 5 as they and the other Loki variants are staring down Alioth. (14:14 - 14:45). This is, interestingly enough, the "Goodbyes" track.

Now Chris talks about it a little bit and identifies it as the Mobius theme combined with a heroic mode of the Loki theme, but doesn't go into further analysis of it. Personally, within the context of the show, I think that it's extremely interesting that this heroic theme for Loki is so obviously filled with Mobius' theme. It could have been a reprise of the Green Theme, but it isn't. Instead, it's Loki's instruments playing Mobius' theme. In other words, in this scene we see the culmination of Mobius' influence on Loki, to the point that Loki is able to be heroic now because he is now symbolically playing Mobius' theme.

Let that sink in, Lokius nation.

Now before I continue with "Goodbyes" and talk about the music in the hug scene, we gotta go back to "Lokius" in episode 4.

We all know this is the song that plays during the interrogation scene, but I think it's important to note what is playing at what point in that scene.

The first section of the track is full of TVA associated instruments, and this plays when Mobius is clearly upset, but mostly just speaking for the TVA through his job as an analyst, playing the heavy keys and lying to Loki about having pruned Sylvie as Loki lies about not caring about her.

Then at about 0:38 in the track, we get these high sliding, falling notes that are almost choral as we watch Loki process this (false) information that Sylvie is gone. It sounds like grieving, and I'd wager that these notes are Loki's grief for Sylvie sound like. Then at 0:58 to 1:50 or thereabout, a more prominent string line shows up, and I think that's the actual Lokius theme. It's a heavy string melody that goes between minor and major, and with the faster strings beneath it, it feels like yearning, like betrayal, and "god I'm so stupid for liking you all this time how could you do this to me," coming from both of them that plays as Loki looks at Mobius with pain written all over his face and Mobius rants about his reality breaking. Which is interesting, because the only other relationship that gets a whole motif to itself is s*lki, thus placing Lokius in a position that functions arguably as a musical foil to s*lki as much as it is a literary one.

But right after Mobius says "What an incredible seismic narcissist! You fell for yourself!" at 1:50 in the track, the music switches again, this time to the Norwegian fiddle played by Olav Luksengard Mjeklva over Loki's line "Her name was Sylvie." It's the same instrument that's played in "Frigga" and when Loki is mourning Ragnarok in the Archives, but the melody is different, indicating that Loki's feelings about Sylvie are associated with his feelings about Frigga (re: he looks at her like he looks at his mother) and home but aren't exactly the same.

And then it lingers on a high choral note for a second as Loki yells, "Is she alive?!" and Mobius responds, "For now," then cuts out entirely for a while in the scene, only to continue at 2:09 in the track halfway through Loki's desperate attempt to get Mobius to believe him, right when he says "and erased your memories" and goes on about how Mobius might have had a family and a life. And the motif that plays is almost identical to the "Frigga" track there, reinforcing the connection between that motif and the concept of lost family, and by extension, Loki's association of Sylvie with lost family. And it's here that Mobius pauses, looking at Loki and seeing that he's telling the truth because it's the same look he saw on Loki's face when grieving his mother. Though he ignores that insight because of his anger, and as Mobius continues to rant, it holds on the final high, hesitating note that calls back to the prior high notes in the beginning associated with Loki's grief and desperation before the song ends and Loki gets thrown back in the Time Cell.

Like @conniving-craven-pathetic-worm says in this post, however, the Lokius theme gets reprised in "Goodbyes" from 2:50 to 3:03. At first glance it doesn't seem to be the same melody, but it's got the same spacing of notes as the Lokius theme, and musically it resolves happily with swelling strings, which at this point in the show, are instruments we have come to associate with Loki's character.

This brings us back to my earlier discussion of "Goodbyes" and the theory that the whole beginning of the song where Mobius' theme is played on Loki's instruments is meant to represent Loki accepting his new role as hero through Mobius' influence and why I feel that this analysis is accurate.

Normally, when we hear a leitmotif like that, it's paired obviously with the associated character/emotion/thing and we know what it's referring to, like previously where whenever Mobius shows up onscreen, we hear a little twang on the guitar or his full motif. However, in this instance of his theme, what we see on screen is not a focus on Mobius. Rather, it pans over the Lokis looking out over Alioth and then zooms in on each of their faces as this dramatic version of Mobius' theme plays. Musically, this wouldn't make sense unless it was saying that here, each of these Lokis is deciding to take on a heroic role instead of an antagonistic one because of what Mobius has said to them.

It's especially driven home because there is a point in the track where Mobius' theme is played on his guitar as contrast, and that moment is directly associated with Mobius, when he gives Loki that pining look and says "Burn it to the ground!," a scene that is so incredibly for Mobius and about Mobius. And after that is when we get the reprise of the Lokius theme with the adding of the strings associated with Loki.

Mobius is so pivotal to Loki in this scene that it isn't until he physically leaves through the Time Door and is "out of sight out of mind" in a way, that we hear Loki's brass leitmotif (or doom horns as conniving-craven calls them) again.

Tl;dr "Lokius" isn't a mashup of Loki and Mobius' leitmotifs, it's a whole separate theme on its own that parallels the romance motif in the Lamentis nexus event, "Pep Talk," and during the s*lki kiss. However, "Goodbyes" is a mashup of their leitmotifs and as a song, represents how every Loki's positive character development has been because of Mobius, while at the same time reprises the Lokius motif into one more recognizably romantic and sweet.

363 notes • Posted 2021-08-25 23:05:43 GMT

#2

Okay but episode 4 from Mobius' perspective is literally the saddest thing if you let yourself think about it for too long.

Imagine you're Mobius and you have a huge massive crush on Loki, and by the end of episode 2 you feel like you've bonded so well, and you know, maybe there's a chance he likes you back. But then he betrays you, runs through that time door after Sylvie and everyone is telling you he's just yeeted out Like Always but you're like "No there's gotta be another explanation. We were friends. Really friends. We had something."

And then you find out that not only did he yeet after Sylvie, as you're dragging them through the halls, all they look at is each other, and it's not until Sylvie's down another corridor that Loki even pays you any mind or says anything to you. And you're just absolutely seething because of course everyone else was right. How could you be so stupid to think Loki could ever like you back? Hes a literal god. You're just some random guy, a bureaucrat. Of course he would rather be with some crazy, stab-happy version of HIMSELF than you.

And you feel so jealous, so angry, so unwanted you can barely think straight. But you still have to do your job even though you feel like this, so you lie and sneer and poke and prod because you're angry and hurting and a part of you wants Loki to hurt too. And then as you're interrogating him, you see him get all teary eyed over Sylvie, and you think, "How horribly painful and awful is this?" He'd cry over this girl after knowing her for less than a day, but he'd leave you without a care in the world. Not a goodbye or any sort of explanation. Would he even care if someone had told him you were pruned? Unlikely.

And you're so upset that even when Loki's yelling at you, desperately trying to make you see he's telling you the truth, it doesn't relieve you to see so clearly in his eyes that he's not lying, because those are the same eyes that you just saw worried over and crushing on Sylvie. So you slam your face directly into denial because how dare he? How dare he be honest now? And so you run away before you let yourself get sucked back in by those eyes, but it's too late, the damage is done. And even though you're angry and bitter and kind of wish Loki would just disappear, you can't deny he was being honest for very long. So you go and stick your neck out and investigate anyway, because you're nothing if not a lovesick fool, and even being angry at him isn't going to change that, no matter how much you try.

And if you're being honest with yourself, something really has been off about this whole thing, and Loki's rare honesty was the proverbial straw that broke your camel's back in this whole mess. After all, you've never been good at denying him when he looks at you like that. You were bad at it when he wanted to go to an apocalypse with you, and you're bad at it now. So you steal Ravonna's tempad and look for yourself. And where else could you go except to the archives where you and Loki had spent so much time together hidden away? It's only appropriate. And what you find just makes your heart sink.

Not only was Loki telling the truth, it's so much worse than either of you realized. Ravonna had killed C-20. And she had lied to you. And what beautiful, horrible irony that the person who was supposed to do nothing but lie was the one being honest, and your friend for nobody even knows how long is the one lying to you. Your whole world starts crashing down around you, and it's too much. You were already emotionally wrecked by everything going on with Loki. You didn't need this too. And oh God, the implications of it.

This means that everything you've done and said your whole known life has been wrong. And more importantly, it means you've hurt and killed for nothing. And that guilt just eats at your soul as you remember what you've said even just to Loki.

"You were born to bring pain and suffering and death. All so that others can be the best versions of themselves."

What have you done? How much damage have you caused? And it's this thought that spurs you forward. Because screw ideology. Screw glorious purpose. What even are those in the face of a person in pain, much less the person you've found yourself caring about more than anything else?

So you run. Almost on instinct. You run to Loki knowing exactly what memory you've looped him through out of bitterness and jealousy and spite, and you're praying you haven't caused irreparable damage.

"You deserve to be alone, and you always will be."

No, no, no, of course he doesn't. He has you. He'll always have you if you have any say in the matter. He has...

Sylvie.

You remember her. Them. The nexus event. And you have a theory. A theory you hate so much it makes you want to crawl out of your own skin and die, but it makes too much sense, and unfortunately, it could work. So as you step into the time prison, you ask.

"Do you really believe you deserve to be alone?"

And he says he doesn't know, but you can see he just doesn't want to admit that yes, he does. And it breaks your heart because you know that you've had a part in that. So you apologize in the only way you think Loki could begin to accept.

"You can be whoever, whatever you want to be. Even someone good."

And part of you is saying that to yourself too, because heaven knows you need to hear it just as much. And Loki's words are still ringing in your ears.

Friend.

How bittersweet. But you're an adult. You know you can't demand Loki's affection as much as you selfishly want to. If he wants to be with Sylvie, you'll force yourself to find some way to cope with that. It's fine. It only makes sense. You'd rather have Loki in your life as a friend than nothing at all. And you're happy to be reconciled at least a little.

But then you step out into the Time Theatre and everything stops. Ravonna is standing there and she's obviously pissed. She knows. You deflect, you lie, try to be as Loki as you can to get out of this. You're surrounded by Minutemen and pruning sticks but all you can think is you can't let Loki get hurt. Not now. He's the key to taking down the TVA. And it's clear Ravonna is having none of it. But you know her. You were friends. Good friends. And you know she's more angry at you than Loki at the moment. So you realize what you have to do to keep it that way. To protect him.

So you press the button you know will hurt her the most. You answer her question from just a short while ago. You bring all the focus onto you, knowing what it'll likely mean. Knowing it'll hurt her and make her lash out. You're not stupid. You're good at reading people. That's why you're an analyst. And if it means protecting Loki, you know you'd have been willing to die much longer ago than is probably reasonable.

You don't even try to avoid the pruning stick. And honestly? It's not even the most painful thing you've experienced today.

And besides. It's better this way. Now Loki can be with Sylvie, be happy, and you don't have to feel a dagger through your heart every time they look at each other. And it's not like Loki will really miss you.

It's better this way.

476 notes • Posted 2021-07-24 16:28:00 GMT

#1

After some thinking, a conversation with my sister-in-law with a psych degree, and a couple of sessions with my godsend of a therapist, I think I've finally put my finger on the thing about Mobius that Loki (and a lot of the fandom tbh) so quickly latched onto like a man dying of thirst at the first sign of water:

Unconditional positive regard.

This concept is at the core of client-centered psychology and basically is a stance that a therapist will take in relation to their client, where they simply accept and support their client as a person, regardless of what they do or say.

My therapist uses this framework with me, and when the Loki series came out, I immediately saw Mobius and was like "holy crap, this man has the exact same energy as Sami what???" And I couldn't for the life of me figure out why until I was talking about it with my sister-in-law and she mentioned unconditional positive regard. And then it clicked.

Mobius radiates unconditional positive regard from the minute he meets Loki in episode 1, and arguably even from the first time we even see him onscreen. He approaches everyone he interacts with using a basic framework of "I see you and care about you as a person, and nothing you do or say can change that," so we immediately get the impression that this man is soft, kind, and shaped like a friend. However, it's most obvious and pointed in his interactions with Loki.

While yes, Mobius' primary objective in episode 1 is to interrogate Loki, it's important to note that it's not an interrogation where Mobius is trying to find proof of guilt for a crime like we'd see in a typical detective procedural. Rather, Mobius is trying to see if this variant of Loki is self aware enough to be able to help him in his hunt for Sylvie. It's fundamentally a test to find out Loki's current place in his emotional and psychological development. It is not maliciously intended, and it is not designed to harm Loki. On the contrary, the intent is clearly to help Loki begin to come to terms with the reality of who he is and the choices he has made.

In fact, the whole time this is happening, Mobius very purposefully strives to foster an environment where Loki knows that A.) Mobius sees him. Truly sees and knows him. B.) Despite knowing what Loki is and what he's done, Mobius loves him and regards him positively, and C.) nothing Loki can do or say will change that positive regard.

Loki, however, is super not used to receiving unconditional positive regard. He has no idea how to respond to it. He feels like it's a trick, like there's another shoe just waiting to drop. I related to him hardcore in this scene because that's exactly how I felt when my therapist presented me with unconditional positive regard for the first time. It's confusing and strange and difficult to believe at first. Especially because it sets the stage for honest self reflection and personal growth that can be incredibly painful.

Loki is not a perfectly innocent person. He has done a lot of really bad things and hurt a lot of people in his life. He has a lot of very deep seated trauma that has informed these actions, but he still made those choices and he needs to take responsibility for them. This is not a fun process. Mobius knows this is actually a really awful, sucky process. But he also knows that change and growth requires two things: acknowledgement that a change needs to be made and the expectation that change can and will occur when properly cultivated. Mobius clearly laying out the reality of Loki's actions and who he is in the Sacred Timeline is the first part of that equation, and his unflappable, unconditional positive regard towards Loki as a person despite knowing that reality cultivates an environment for the second part to flourish.

"By definition, it is essential in any helping relationship to have an anticipation for change. In the counseling relationship, that anticipation presents as Hope—an optimism that something good and positive will develop to bring about constructive change in the client's personality. Thus, unconditional positive regard means that the therapist has and shows overall acceptance of the client by setting aside their own personal opinions and biases. The main factor in unconditional positive regard is the ability to isolate behaviors from the person who displays them." (source)

Mobius is not Loki's therapist, but he does take on a therapeutic role in Loki's life. He shows Loki that he is fully aware of all of Loki's faults and mistakes. He's seen them over and over again and knows them by heart because it's his job. And in the face of all of that he looks at Loki and says that he doesn't see him as a villain. That he likes him anyway and believes that Loki has the potential to help him and what he believes is the cause of good. (Yes the TVA is corrupt, but neither of them know that at this point, and the fact that both Mobius and Loki believe this to be the side of good to varying degrees is important here)

Mobius maintains this regard throughout the series and his subsequent interactions with Loki and when talking about Loki to Ravonna and others, and it's a big part of why Loki so quickly trusts and feels comfortable around Mobius. I know some people say it's unrealistic how fast it was, but it made a lot of sense just based on my experience. I mean, after one (1) session with my therapist, I was 100% ride or die for him, and it was kind of absurd. But the feeling of being seen like that is so potent when you're starved for it, that extreme reactions to it make a lot of sense. And if anyone's starved for unconditional positive regard, it's Loki.

Mobius is only human though, and he's not perfect at this. Over the course of the series, it's clear that Mobius has emotionally invested a lot in his Loki, and he struggles to maintain a professional distance, though he usually is able to keep his head enough to give Loki that positive regard he needs. The only time we see this regard slip is in episode 4 when Mobius is feeling betrayed and jealous. In these moments, Mobius is unable to step back from his feelings enough to get into a headspace where he can separate Loki's actions from who he is. He calls Loki an asshole and a bad friend, and it comes from a place of hurt and jealousy. It's also what drives Loki into a defensive mode we haven't seen since episode 1. He's no longer receiving that unconditional positive regard from Mobius and he feels betrayed. He worries that maybe it was all an act in the first place and Mobius never really cared for him at all. For the first time, Loki feels like Mobius doesn't see the best in him anymore and it hurts.

Mobius' unconditional positive regard was genuine, though, and this is reinforced in the subsequent scenes where we see him act on his instinctual desire to assume the best of Loki and investigate his claims. We see it again when he returns to Loki and he reaffirms both his desire to trust Loki and his belief that Loki can be "whoever, whatever he wants to be, even someone good." At this point, Loki is able to accept it and no longer pushes back against Mobius' belief in Loki's goodness and that he "has within himself vast resources for self-understanding, for altering his self-concept, attitudes, and self-directed behavior." He's grown and begun to see himself in a more realistic and positive light and it's a direct result of the time Mobius has spent cultivating that relationship based on unconditional positive regard.

That's why their relationship feels so comfortable and satisfying. Unconditional positive regard isn't only a therapy principle. It's something everyone craves in a relationship. To be seen as you are, flaws and mistakes and quirks and all is terrifying and mortifying, but when that person then just smiles and says I love you anyway because you are not your mistakes and you are not your flaws and nothing you can ever do or say can change how I feel about you, the relief and joy and comfort is more than worth the discomfort. So I think the idea that Mobius can look at someone as deeply flawed, broken, and jaded as Loki and love him exactly as he is right there and then, eyes wide open and smiling, believing that beneath it all Loki has the potential to be good, gives us hope that someone could do the same for us. I know that's what Lokius does for me, at least. Mobius represents to me the ideal of unconditional positive regard, and having an image of what that looks like in the character of Mobius gives us the opportunity to apply it to ourselves when we may not get it elsewhere in our lives. And I, for one, think that's very sexy of him.

1014 notes • Posted 2021-07-26 13:02:28 GMT

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[pueraeternuspan]

I posted 741 times in 2021

102 posts created (14%)

639 posts reblogged (86%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 6.3 posts.

I added 418 tags in 2021

#thedragcnbrother - 90 posts

#out of neverland - 52 posts

#the king of neverland (peter) - 51 posts

#tinypaintedthings - 47 posts

#ashortdropandasuddenstop - 46 posts

#thedragonclone - 38 posts

#peter pan ouat - 28 posts

#words of a little bird ( 🐣 musings 🐊 ) - 27 posts

#curious little questions ( 🎶 memes 🎶 ) - 22 posts

#the false king (malcolm) - 17 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#as someone who needs cc/subtitles/transcripts it ticks me off when none are available or worse changed to where its obvious that's not what

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

@thedragonclone 

“Hello Dreamshade...” He holds his hands up, “I’m just here to talk to you.”

22 notes • Posted 2021-04-28 05:37:39 GMT

#4

New Thought

Dark One Malcolm!

Here me out. Basically Malcolm becomes the Dark One to provide for Rumple and maybe also becoming youthful to so he can play more with his son. Changing his name to Peter Pan in honor of his sons doll and to stop people calling out his name and bothering him and his son’s time together.

Basically Dark!Malcolm but actual good papa!Malcolm! Basically doing what Rumple did only no exchanging his son for youth or a dagger. I want them happy dammit!

Like I mean Malcolm would destroy your lives especially if you made his son cry. He is still dark and mean but he loves his son.

23 notes • Posted 2021-04-06 23:38:36 GMT

#3

“He may look like a boy, but he’s a bloody demon” -Killian Jones about Peter Pan.

Reasons why he could be seen as a demon

He can sound like any person. An example is the Tiger Lilly incident (as Killian called it before). And maybe almost any animal, though he prefers crowing. So imagine being alone at night and suddenly hearing the voice of your friend, or yourself.. luring you away deeper into the dark jungle.

Another reason is from a more religious undertone. So for someone to see a wild boy that talks to Fae that are mostly heard as only bells to anyone else that don’t know the Faerie language, able to use magic, growls and runs around like some wild beast. Yeah, sounds like the child of a demon alright or a demon himself. And it can be taken back in history that Fae were called demons by the church way back when. Again, may be grasping at straws but thought I’d have thrown this in.

Pan’s youth. It is eternal. On Neverland you can stay young forever, but imagine seeing a boy from over fifty years ago appearing before you looking the same. You’d probably quickly think he was some vampire or something. 

Peter’s shadow. In the OUAT version, he and the Shadow are two different beings. But at the same time, Peter seems to control it either way sooo it’s scary to see some dark being attack on Peter’s orders. 

The Neverland seems more alive when Peter is there (in the book, unsure if it was in ouat to). It can change with Peter’s magic if he so wished.

He kind of steals kids away with promises of eternal fun and family in all canon, lies or not. 

In the book, he switches sides in wars because he wants to have more fun.

Killian is deathly afraid of Pan. In the scene of going up dead man’s peak and Pan’s bargain, he doesn’t look in Peter’s eyes, is on edge, and seems afraid of Pan. 

At the end of season 2, no one so much as mentioned his name.. the Dark One himself was afraid of Pan; and yes this was BEFORE the writers told Robert and Robbie that their characters were father and son. So when the darkest villain we know is afraid of someone else.. that in itself is frightening. (and yes I am still mad that we didn’t get a battle between Rumple and Pan, or hell Pan and Regina. I wanted to see a Pan vs. fight so badly)

This is just OUAT/Book canon. 

If I missed anything, do feel free to add on something I missed given it’s been a while since I read the book.

My canon on why he could be seen as a demon.

He was born and abandoned by his parents, only to be found and raised by the Fae (i think that is semi canon in some stories and the original Barrie book. At least the Fae raising part). 

When my Peter fights, he can be manipulative yes, but he will literally tear someone to shreds with his sharp teeth and nails if he wants to. Having a feral boy walking and snarling while covered in a rather unfortunate pirate’s blood is probably a sight that would haunt a lot of fearless people.

He growls and makes animal like sounds when with people. Most of the time when he’s frustrated and bored does he growl out and walk off to do his own thing.

He can run around on all fours and jump trees with frightening ease. Flight happens but he can be quicker and quieter when stalking on the ground or in trees.

His eyes have a green glow about them, mostly in the dark or when he has magic ready to launch.

Pan is the Pied Piper and can control rats like the original story, as well as have a panpipe that can only be heard by unloved and lost people. 

Sometimes one can see him talking to animals. Do they understand him and vice versa? No one knows.

26 notes • Posted 2021-08-17 23:56:45 GMT

#2

@imbicilite​ continued from here

The green eyed demon looked at the other, almost disappointed to hear him give up so quickly and the boy hadn’t even harmed the other yet. Almost. A lesson was a lesson, and he wouldn’t be respected much if he allowed the other to go just because Lefou gave in so quickly. “The list you can do is try and convince me not to do this.. I mean, it wouldn’t work but it’d be fun.”

Peter Pan was no where near a hero here. Just a twisted and evil boy. “Ever played Target Practice... The Fool, right?” 

He smirked as the other Lost Ones around snickered. Humiliation is one thing.. but Peter just saw this as a fun game for him to enjoy. “Here is a better question. Why am I doing this to you? If you get it right, I might let you go. Go on~”

27 notes • Posted 2021-04-27 01:43:13 GMT

#1

you know what we definitely needed. Why Killian worked for Pan? Like why did he go back to Neverland after swearing he never would? Was there a very valid and good reason for it? 

From how much these two are together in the book and movies, I’m just here confused/annoyed that they never really had Pan spend more time with Killian. Hell, not even a scene in the Underworld, couldn’t have Pan mocking the Captain or doing the: told you love would kill you.

Yes, I will complain and think about these moments forever.

32 notes • Posted 2021-01-30 04:47:21 GMT

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[thosekidswhohuntmonsters]

If by Some Miracle

Summary: What happens when Thor finds out about you and Loki? Will Thor allow his own secret feelings for you to make everything come crashing down? Will both brothers clash badly enough to rival the titans? Or, will everyone see that Loki is much more than a man with a troubled past? 

Word Count: 1019

Warnings: sexual themes, swearing, fighting 

Authors note: ah yes, the angst in this one. what was I going through when I wrote this LOL this is an oldie guys! p.s. there’s no cheating in this fic, I don’t fuck with that. 

♡if you enjoy this fic you’re welcome to leave a reblog/like/comment! feedback is not only welcomed but encouraged!♡

You were in the compound’s kitchen with Bucky when in stormed an extremely angry Loki, followed by an annoyed Thor. Bucky looked to you, “I wonder what that’s about doll”. You nodded your head, your heart racing.

Tensions between Thor and Loki had been a lot higher lately, and it broke your heart. You loved Thor, he was your closest friend, but you’d also grown extremely close to Loki. The only reason that was a problem was because Thor had an apparent crush on you.

It was so obvious that everyone knew about it, but you knew it was merely just a crush. Part of you thought he was just confused after everything that had happened with Jane, so regardless you’d kept just how close you’d gotten to Loki a secret.

By now their bickering had caused nearly everyone to come into the kitchen. Steve stood next to you, “How’d this all start (y/n)....(y/n)”. When Steve repeated your name it caused you to finally look up at him.

Through furrowed brows he asked, “Is everything okay doll?”. Before you could answer him you heard your name again, but this time it was leaving Thor’s lips. Suddenly all eyes were on you, and you didn’t know why.

Thor repeated himself, “You’re sleeping with lady (y/n) Loki!?”. There it was, out in the open and no taking back. Softly you heard Sam say, “Shittt man..”. You stood there unable to say anything as you watched Thor’s anger grow.

Bucky quietly asked, “Is that true (y/n)”. All you did was nod your head, part of your heart breaking as you saw how angry Thor was. Loki was going crazy with madness, “Is that so wild brother? Someone choses asgard’s disappointment over asgard’s promise child?!”.

You shook your head as you saw Thor extend his hand, summoning mjolnir. Loki could tell he’d struck a nerve, “It drives you mad to know it is my name that falls from her lips like a prayer...although it is nothing but sinful”.

Your cheeks went red from the looks the entire room was giving you now that the nature of your relationship with Loki was out. Thor spun mjolnir in his hand, but you’d had enough.

Loudly you said, “Stop this..the both of you”. While both in their battle stances both men now looked to you. First you looked to Loki, “I expect more from you Loki….I know you’re so much more than these mind games”.

Then you turned to Thor, “And Thor although I know you love me….I know it’s not the way you still love Jane”. His whole expression softened and he parted his lips to speak, but instead just nodded his head.

Finally you said, “So now more fighting okay? If you both kill each other neither of you can have me at all”. Both men tried not too, but they found themselves smiling.

Loki moved towards you put you held up a finger, “Oh I’m not done with you just yet”. He licked his lips but listened to you and you heard the men behind you cheer. Thor let mjolnir fall to the ground as he took a step towards you, “I’m sorry lady (y/n)...and I’m afraid you’re right…”.

He smiled, “Although my love for you is strong, it is not the way I love Jane...I don’t know why I-”. Shaking your head you finally hugged him. Softly you said, “Go find her”. Thor squeezed you tightly before grabbing mjolnir, going out onto the balcony, and flying off.

There stood Loki, looking to you with his best version of puppy-dog eyes. Laughing you said, “Oh it’s going to take a lot more than that for me to forgive you”. You heard Sam make a remark, something to do with sex, and you rolled your eyes.

Loki’s hands were behind his back, “Pet if you let me-”. Again you heard Sam’s voice say, “Pet” in a suggestive tone. You opened your mouth to speak but before you could Loki snapped his fingers, teleporting the both of you to his room.

He shrugged, “I couldn’t listen to their remarks any longer love”. Your arms were crossed over your chest. Loki stepped towards you, “Can I atleast explain my pet?”. You nodded your head and Loki began.

His voice was soft, “Thor and I had gotten into a disagreement where he said that I am still unfit to rule and that-” you eased up, knowing how that must’ve hurt Loki very badly.

You knew full well that Loki still seeks approval from Thor. Loki continued, “He said that I still wasn’t worthy...that I still cannot be trusted... so I had said that I was worthy enough for you”. Your lips parted, and you realized he now stood in front of you.

Loki lifted your chin up, “You have taught me how to believe in myself (y/n)...it was you that first saw the man I have always wanted to be and believed in it”. All your anger melted away as  you smiled.

Loki licked his lips, “I couldn’t help myself (y/n)...I wanted everyone to know that someone as remarkable as you has chosen me...chosen me when no one ever has”. You felt yourself begin to be rushed with emotion.

Resting a hand against his chest you softly said, “I will always choose you Loki...I love you”. His eyes widened, Loki had never thought you’d feel that way about him. You words were like a prayer, and he felt the pain in his chest began to ease as he heard them.

His forehead pressed against yours as he breathlessly said, “I shall love you until my last breath (y/n)”. Finally Loki crashed his lips against yours, wanting to make sure this all had been real.

When Loki felt your soft lips against his, your hand tugging at his hair innocently although the effect it had on him was sinful, he knew that by some miracle this was all real. You were all he truly needed to feel complete.

♡ thank you for taking the time to read this, you’re a babe♡

Forever tags: aka some amazing people: @moonlessnight14 @sexyvixen7 @angieptt​ @painkiller80 @becca-dolan @team-heichou @thatpeachybandgirl​ @allthesesonsobitches @buckybarneshairpullingkink @couldabeenamermaid​ @taeeemin​ @littleredstarfish @nali67​ @only4wakingup​ @mcenziehughes​

*if there is a line through your name that means that for some reason it won’t allow me to tag you*

*forever tags are always open*

[thosekidswhohuntmonsters]

Life Gains it’s Magic 

Summary: It’s hard not to have a major crush on the angel that is Steve Rogers, and just because none of your friends can blame you for it, doesn’t mean they can’t tease you about it. 

Word Count: 3249

Authors note: my lil summary doesn’t do this fic justice! honestly this one is gonna pull at your heart strings and make you feel like all the avengers just want the freakin best for you!!

For my more “spicy” fics click:  here

p.s masterlist under construction

***if you reblog/comment on my fics there’s now a 110% chance you’ve made my heart flutter*** 

    Steve picked his head up at the sound of footsteps, his expression softening as he realized who the sound belonged to. His eyes quickly scanned up and down your body, although he wished he could admire you for longer, and he found himself mirroring that infamous smile of yours.

“Hey (y/n)”, it was short and sweet but all he could manage. It was wild, but being around you had this affect on him. To put things simply, he was sure he embodied the look of a love sick pup.

You sat down across from him at the kitchen table. He watched as you tilted your head to the side, and he wished so badly to know what you were thinking. You placed your phone down onto the table face down, silently telling him that he had your full attention.

Of course he picked up on it, and it made his smile grow. You propped your head up by placing your hand below your chin, “I thought you were supposed to be training the new recruits?”.

It wasn’t that you wanted Steve to leave, if anything you wanted him to stay forever, you were just curious as to why he was wearing navy blue sweatpants and a white t-shirt instead of his suit.

Steve placed down his paper, a more obvious sign that you had his full attention. He held your gaze, “Sam told me, while really threatened me, into taking a break. Said I need to check myself before I wreck myself, but I really think he misses taking charge”.

You let out a small giggle at Steve’s impression of Sam, it was spot on. Steve felt proud of himself for making you laugh, as if it was as great of an accomplishment as the Medal of Honor.

“I have to say I’m kinda bummed that your pjs aren’t star spangled, or camo”.

It was Steve’s turn to laugh, but unbeknown to him it also had an affect on you. The way he always licked his lips before letting out hearty chuckle made your heart flutter. Sometimes you wondered how many hearts he had silently broken just by being this effortlessly sexy.

Steve took a sip of his coffee, “Oh Tony bought me my very own Captain America onesie last Christmas, but I only break it out on special occasions”. For what felt like the hundredth time since you’d walked into the kitchen and sat down, the room was once again filled with laughter.

Steve had never had conversation just flow so seamlessly before. As much as being around you could make his head dizzy and his heartbeat quicken, you were one of the easiest people to talk to.

He felt his stomach drop as you began to look at him mischievously. You had a certain glimmer in your eyes, “Well my birthday is coming up soon..”. He couldn’t help but chuckle, and blush, as he caught on.

Steve hummed in response, “I can’t exactly say that isn’t a special occasion...but-”. He watched as you leaned forward and did a version of puppy-dog eyes that rivaled Bucky's’. You clasped your hands together, “It would be like the best birthday gift ever! Come on, Bucky showed me those old pictures of you doing press in the old Cap costume, so if you can sock ole’ Adolf in the face you can def rock a onesie! For me!”.

As Steve heard you pleadingly say, for me, he felt his heart melt. God there was no way he could ever say no to that, the words leaving your lips put him in a trace. You could’ve asked for his heart itself and he would’ve said yes.

Accepting defeat he told you, “How could I say no then, doll”. He hadn’t meant to include the pet name, but the second it left his lips it had awoken something inside of him. Steve had suddenly come face to face with an intense longing he had never felt before.

He wanted you, not just in that way, he just craved your presence. About every cheesy line from each Rom Com Bucky had made him watch flooded his mind. Steve wanted to breathe your air, to bask in your warmth, to just experience the magic that was you.

It wasn’t a moth drawn to a flame, or bears drawn to honey, it was like the way a plant bends toward the sun. Steve felt as though being with you would make him grow. Even just joking around with you made him feel more confident and free, just as how sunlight nourishes a shadow-ridden plant.

The table began to vibrate as your phone started to ring. Flipping it over and reading the name you saw that it was Tony, and thus your work day had begun. However, you didn’t want to end what was just starting before you.

So you let it ring as you winked and told Steve, “Then I can’t wait, doll”. Steve had never known one word put together with one look could make his stomach have butterflies. You were so alluring without even knowing.

Finally you picked up the phone to a semi-annoyed Tony, “Alright R2D2, you can’t start talking statistics to me until there’s caffeine in my system. Let me go to Mels on third, I’ll get you a breakfast burrito, and then we can discuss the success rates of the Spider Tracer”.

Steve gave you a soft smile, knowing that within a moment or two you’d be rushing out the door and to the team’s favorite breakfast place. He held in his laughter as you began to silently mock Tony as he continued to speak on the other line.

As quickly as he could he tore off a piece of the newspaper, and scribbled something onto it. Now that you were up from the table you walked toward him and took the paper. Instantly you smiled with reading it.

Steve had written down, “just think about the onesie, and the matching Cap slippers”. In order to stop yourself from laughing you covered your mouth with your hand. Taking his pen from his hand you wrote back, “I can picture it now ;)”.

The winky face was a little daring, but so had been Steve calling you doll. Besides, it was adorable to watch a blush slowly creep upon his cheeks as he read your little note. Steve mouthed, “Good Luck” before letting you grab your jacket and start your day.

As much as he hated you leaving, this had been your best interaction yet. It was the first time that the tension between you both was tangible, to be cheesy love was in clearly the air. Steve still felt himself smiling even after you left.

Just because you were physically gone didn’t mean that you had left his mind. The Star Spangled Man with a plan felt himself re-reading the same sentence from his paper over and over again, his mind clearly fixated on you.

The sound of a cabinet closing made Steve wake from his daydreams, Bucky had entered the kitchen. Buck was rummaging through the cabinets like a wild animal, but to be fair he had just came back from his morning run.

“What, or who, were you dreaming about?”. Just like always, Bucky cut right through the bullshit. It was probably because given all their time together reading Steve had become second nature to him.

Steve averted his gaze, a clear tell, “Who says I’m dreamin about anyone?”. Bucky wanted to laugh, looks like the serum hadn’t enhanced Steve’s ability to lie convincingly. Bucky began to scramble some eggs.

“Because for the past week you’ve said a certain someone's name in your sleep, and as I passed this certain someone in the hall she asked me if I wanted my usual from Mels”.

Steve just smiled, he was caught. There was no way to lie himself out of this one. He finally turned to Bucky, “Alright Buck, you’re right”. Bucky smiled to himself, although it was nice to hear, he already knew he was right.

“What’s the problem? Gonna wait another 70 years before you get the girl?

It might’ve sounded a little harsh, but Bucky was right. Steve had spent so much time putting others before himself, Steve needed to put himself first. Also they weren’t talking about some girl, they were talking about you.

Bucky knew you were different. It was the way Steve’s eyes brightened when you entered a room, the way he always looked at you when he thought no one was watching, and the way you made Steve laugh harder than anyone else could.

What was the point of wasting time when you had someone like that in your life? People like that don’t come around often. So yeah Bucky teased, a little harshly, but it was out of love.

Steve sighed, “No...but I’m not sure how to get this one”. It wasn’t a question of whether or not Steve wanted you, we’ve already been over that, it was a question of mustering up the confidence.

Bucky grabbed a plate from the dishwasher, “The thing is Steve you know how to get her. For some reason she really likes you, punk. You can rush head first into any fight, but you’re too afraid to tell a girl, you desperately like, how you feel”.

Steve laughed, he was always the first to stand up for others but the last to do so for himself. Something finally clicked inside of him, whether it was the last bit of ice in his brain finally melting, or the sudden realization that above all; love is worth fighting for most.

Before Bucky could even put his eggs on his plate Steve was up from the table and grabbing for his coat. He threw a teasing glance Bucky’s way, “I think this is one fight I’ll finally win”.

Steve was hinting to the countless times Bucky had saved him when he’d picked off more than he could crew, and before the serum that was nearly every fight. Some friends liked to watch movies together, Bucky and Steve liked to save each other from near death experiences.

After sharing a laugh, Steve was out the door and Bucky was left with his breakfast. Bucky wished he could see it now, Steve running through the streets of New York on a mission to confess his love, maybe all the Rom Coms had gotten to them.

The ringing of the welcome bells weren’t the only reason everyone was now looking at the door, it was because the door itself had been pulled from its hinges. There stood Steve, a determined look on his face.

“I’m sorry Mel I promise I’ll fix it, and buy a coffee and donut for everyone here”.

You grinned, ah yes, chivalry at its finest. Mel just smiled, more entertained by the show that was about to begin. Besides, this was nothing compared to the time baby Groot accidentally broke an entire display chasing a fly.

As Steve’s eyes found yours, the happy cheers of the customers faded, and the rest of the room seemed to vanish. It was just you and him, and the way he felt about you and him, that remained.

With the same amount of purpose and strength he marched into battle with, he strode towards you. It had seemed as though in a sea of people you were the lighthouse, and he the ship. It had been a long and perilous voyage, but finally he was coming home.

“I really like you (y/n). I like how life seems lighter with you, I like that you always tease Tony, and how Bucky feels comfortable enough around you to tell you about his nightmares, and that you make me feel like I can be who I am”

He seemed calmer, “Not Captain America, not a soldier, just Steve Rogers”. He wondered if you could understand how important that was, that when he was with you he wasn’t some leader or icon but just rather a person.

You nearly dropped Tony’s order from your hands. This was not how you’d expected this morning to go. You’d thought that you’d have to spend the next week constantly dreaming about your earlier flirting with Steve, but here he was confessing his feelings for you.

As you looked at his face, and how sure of himself he was, all nerves faded from your body. You took a step toward him, “I like you too Steve, but I think I’d rather show you”. You placed Tony’s order on the counter, and finally did something you’d been dreaming about for months.

You kissed Steve, hard and long, and in a room full of people. But none of that mattered. Your world was standing right in front of you, kissing you back, and everything else was merely static.

Suddenly you knew how it must’ve felt when the first caveman created fire. The electricity that jolted through their fingertips as rock against rock created spark, how alurring the flames were as they grew, and the warmth of the fire itself.

Even as you pulled back from Steve you could still feel that initial spark on your lips. Slowly, and reluctantly, he let you out of his arms. It had only been one kiss but it confirmed that the ice that plagued Steve was finally melting.

You could see him beginning to blush, so you wanted to lighten the mood. Distracting him from the fact that you both had just got it on in a room full of people you teased, “So since I like Steve Rogers, does that mean I don’t get to see Steve Rogers in a certain Captain America onesie?”.

He grinned, “I’ll be wearing a Steve Rogers onsie under the Captain America one, so if you’re lucky-”. Steve stopped his sentence when he realized how forward he was being. He might as well have just asked to reenact the dirty dream he’d had about you last week.

Luckily enough for him, he was saved by the bell, or well he was saved by Tony on the other line. During the kiss you accidentally pressed speaker mode and Tony was not going to waste an opportunity to shine.

“If she’s lucky she’ll see you in your birthday suit? That’s more 50 shades of grey than 50 shades of freedom there Cap”.

The both of you began to laugh, Tony’s comment cutting at the sexual tension between you both. You grinned, “He’s just cranky because he hasn’t had his morning coffee”. You obviously couldn’t see it, but you knew Tony was rolling his eyes on the other line.

“I’m cranky because my assistant and bestfriend have decided to reenact The Notebook while getting my breakfast”.

Tony wasn’t angry in the slightest, he just took pleasure in making Steve all riled up. You took the phone off speaker, “And we’ll use your office to reenact 50 Shades of Grey if you keep it up Stark”.

Steve blushed at the thought, but only because he the idea of it excited him. He didn’t know what Tony said from the other line, but it was passive enough to let you finally hang up the phone.

He pushed back his hair, “Well I should probably fix Mel’s door, and then maybe we could grab lunch on your break?”. It was adorable to see him go from confident and determined to unsure and shy.

You pulled him in for one last kiss, “Not until we make Tony really pissed off first”. Steve laughed, and then felt his brain shut off as your lips were on his. It was like you could magically make every nerve in his body relax.

As the kiss intensified, you knew that as much as you didn’t want to, you needed to stop before a room full of strangers watched you have at it. Steve seemed more sure of himself after the kiss.

He smirked, “Tell Tony I say hi, and that I’m sorry his burritos cold but that he deserved it”. You started to smirk yourself, Steve was becoming more playful by the second. Fighting against his gravitational pull, you walked away from Steve and back out toward the Tower.

Bucky smirked as he heard the familiar sound of heels, instantly he knew it was you. He listened as you hung up your coat, made your way into the kitchen, and opened the microwave.

Smugly he asked, “Why is Tony’s food cold doll?”. Bucky knew exactly why the burrito cold, he could picture it in his head, he just wanted to hear you say it. There was a pause as you wondered what to say.

After rolling your eyes you just turned around to face the smug assassin. There he was, munching on a bowl of cereal with a shit eating grin. You could tell from the look across his face that he already knew the answer to his own question.

Once Bucky knew you knew that he knew, the room was filled with laughter. After taking the last bite of his cereal he walked toward you. Bucky placed the now empty bowl into the sink, leaned toward you and kissed your cheek.

“You two deserve to finally be happy”.

There was another moment of silence as you both processed the emotion behind his words. He had said so much with saying so little. Bucky wasn’t the most talkative, but often when he did say something it was incredibly moving.

He had been through so much, processed so much pain, and had incredible wisdom to show for it. Bucky might’ve looked rough and tough, but he was one of the most empathetic and understanding people you knew.

You couldn’t help but smile in response, “Thank you James”. Although you could’ve spent twenty minutes telling him how much he meant to not only you, but also Steve, you instead decided to let the moment speak for itself.

Sometimes it’s better to just look at someone, to see and feel the emotion radiating off of them, and not ruin it with words. Those moments stay with you the most, when you feel so connected to someone that you don’t have to physically speak to know what they’re thinking.

Bucky nodded his head, “Steve’s happy, Tony’s mildly irritated, I should be thanking you”. Once again the room was filled with laughter, and it felt wonderful. It reminded you of how good things were right now.

When you’re forced to constantly go, go, go, it’s hard to realize how good life is. You’re so busy thinking about the next task that you don’t even register the small things.

The stuff like being able to piss off your best friend instead of the other way around, or having people who truly wish the best for you, and having a man who means the world to you tell you that your his world.

Life can be unpredictable, fast, and difficult, but it can also be magical. There will always be moments that shake you to your core, or make you feel like some greater power is laughing at you, but there is also an undeniable beauty about life.

One morning you can wake up dreading the day you’re about to have, to only have it be the best day of your life. When you listen to that little voice in your heart, that one that whispers your deepest dreams and desires, life gains it’s magic.

if you enjoyed this fic please leave a comment! Or reblog! It lets me know that I should keep doing what I’m doing! Thanks for reading!!