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#I want to be loved in ways that I don’t have to totally compromise my own comfort of living for the other
oglegoggle · 2 years
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It’s honestly really funny to me in retrospect that the moment our relationship really started to decay in my heart was when we went to the second Burn together, but I know full well that for the same reasons I was starting to fall out of love with him he was convinced that they’re the reasons why I’m The One to him.
I spent the entire weekend fixing the problems caused by his dumbassery, babying him through a meltdown, and not reacting explosively to the assorted fuckups of the weekend while he did and managing one crisis after another with grace and responsibility and control.
I can see why he would be enchanted by a man whom doesn’t dump gas on the fire when things go wrong so to speak. But fuck he was deluded to realistically think I would be forever charmed by an idiot whom is incapable of not constantly setting those proverbial fires and expecting me to put them out.
#this is goggles#I spent that entire vacation being dad to an incompetent 30 year old#and he spent that entire vacation feeling like he was living out a legit Hollywood romance movie#I continue to feel like a manic pixie dream gay#like I exist for others’ to further their character arcs#that I’m perfect and dreamy and exactly what they need so long as I go out of my way to fix their life and make them feel adored#but the instant that my pain and my difficult needs read their ugly heads#the instant that I topple off the pedestal and my imperfections shine#it’s game over#like I’m precious and essential and they’ll never let me go when I’m attending to their difficult needs#but the moment I have difficult needs I’m disposable#I’m not worth the effort and sacrifice because their fuckin awful cat means more to them than I do after it legit traumatized me#I’m the perfect man when I’m putting out fires#but I’m garbage to be thrown out when I get burned#I want so dearly to be loved even when it’s not easy and fun#I want to be loved in such a way that responsibility can be a shared burden rather than one I must lift entirely off their shoulders#I want to be loved with affection and attention I want to be touched and held and kissed and I don’t want to feel constantly ignored#I want to be loved in ways that I don’t have to totally compromise my own comfort of living for the other#I like it cold in the house there will be no dogs or cats and the tv can’t be running constantly and it needs ti be kept clean by both of us
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black-lake · 2 months
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The path of warriors 
⚡︎ Aries, leo, capricorn, scorpio and aquarius north node.
🏇🏇🏇
The north node is your karmic path in this lifetime, and as many charts I study and analyze, people with these signs always fascinate me the most with their life stories. These people tend to have the most dramatic journeys I noticed. They all share things in common, persevering alone, beating all odds, relying on themselves, and setting a good example for others. On that note, how have YOU been?? I hope life hasn't been testing you too badly? The day you'll be crowned will come, so hold on love  👑✨👸 I won’t be hyping you up in a sweet way I’ll be shouting at you so don’t mind my aries mercury.
People with these north node signs have to embody the spirit of the warrior, the fighter, the advocate, the trail blazer, the protector, they have no other choice. They persevere through unfathomable hardships. Many of them break generational patterns, needing to forge new ways rather than repeating the old. They remind me of the dragon, the lion, the tiger, the serpent, the owl, the eagle, all the spirit animals that are strong and powerful. This is a check in with you, an acknowledgment for your spirit, and a loving pat in the back from your leo north node friend. 🌞💛
Aries north node.
Rulers - south node: venus, north node: mars
How does it feel like having to fight and defend yourself since you were a child? Being attacked, played with, tested and teased by those around you, even adults coming at you? Being underestimated for your fighting ability and being put in the middle of a battle, unwillingly, even though all you really want is peace and harmony. You found it hard to stand on your own two feet, asserting dominance means conflict. You think you'll find peace but you're put in another battle. I’d be surprised if you haven’t had to fight physically at least once in your life. GET your ass up and STAND up for yourself, loudly, yes make a fuss. Let your voice be heard even if it disrupts the energy in the room. The universe claps for you when you beat their ass and hide the bible if god watching 💥🐯 (kendrick got an aries north node). Never let a bunch of cowards disrespect you, you're up to the challenge. The ways you move in life don’t have to be understood, you're forging new paths. Those who follow crowds lack your strong mindset, lack your vision and bravery. Move with integrity, and remember the truth always prevails at the end. 
With each battle you win, you're cultivating independence, a strong identity, self respect, autonomy over your life and a sense of direction. You are your greatest project and your most significant accomplishment. You've learned to rely on yourself, becoming an initiator, an entrepreneur, an advocate for justice, and a truth teller. Don't wait for people to join you to start, or compromise your needs and goals for others, you can do it solo. Free yourself from your libra ways of people pleasing and seeking social validation. Pick your battles, understand the difference between aggressiveness and assertiveness, and discern what is truly worth fighting for. You're the one who stands up against bullies and liars. You're one of the warriors that the universe uses for justice.
Trust your ideas and instincts, you got all the answers. The universe fights with you and protects you, you're never totally alone. Mistakes teach us lessons, don’t fear them. You're a natural leader, your passion for life is unmatched. You're distinctive, what represents you can’t be duplicated. When life throws obstacles your way, it's to strengthen your fierce confidence, self assurance and independent spirit. 🐅 When you bravely told the truth, when you went your own way, when you created your own thing, when you walked alone, when you took those risks and said fuck what they say, you inspired many people, you awakened many, you left many in awe of your fiery spirit. 
Leo north node.
Rulers - south node: saturn and uranus, north node: sun
How does it feel like to be robbed of your childhood? Being left alone and abandoned as a child? Not receive validation or love? Having your confidence and light targeted and attacked from a young age? Your most beautiful qualities discarded and taken for granted. Your innocence betrayed, your trust and integrity repeatedly broken. Being envied and hated for simply being yourself, for your aura, for shining brightly without lifting a finger. Being alienated, having groups attack you for your unique qualities. Standing confidently alone and walking it all alone. You LEAD, you don't follow, and that can just mean leading your own life. Do you still want to give to others instead of yourself? You can appreciate humanity and inclusivity but release the excessive concern over it. You expose fake groups and encourage authenticity. Princess Diana did everything she wasn’t supposed to do and shined bright doing it, her kindness was golden and her strength was a threat, so they could only attack her (she was a leo north node). Honor yourself, you were blessed by the sun. ☀️💫
You lead from the heart and you're guided by your inner child. Loving yourself and embracing every part of you is for the brave. Leave that group mindset behind, those that just want to fit in are cowards, fuck what the group thinks. Your love, loyalty, strength and generosity are gifts to the world. Don't try to hide your heart, or fall into your aquarius south node ways of turning into an ice queen, isolating yourself and building this artificial heart on top of your real heart, for the greater good or for a bigger cause, or for protecting yourself. Just don’t give to people and places that don't value you. You're learning to bravely STAND up for yourself even if many are against you. You're naturally protected when you are accepting of yourself, and building your self esteem in a genuine way that is based on deep values and not societal expectations.
Heal and free your inner child, don't let the outside noise steal your joy, let yourself play and explore. You'll meet the sun at the end no matter how dark it gets. All those obstacles were meant to make you stronger, develop this inner strength of a lion, this fiery confidence and assurance that isn’t shaken by the outside world. ☄️🦁 That’s who you’re meant to be my love. You're meant to put yourself first at all times, to love, validate and compliment yourself. You’re here to shine in your authenticity. You inspire more people than you know, your spirit won’t go unnoticed, your purity of heart always leaves a mark in this world. Your light is infectious.
Capricorn north node.
Rulers - south node: moon, north node: saturn
How does it feel like being introduced to the harsh realities of the world since a young age? Having to parent yourself without enough support? Being underestimated as a child, restricted, and made to feel inadequate? Being shamed for your sensitivity and emotions. Being placed in the most troubled family with difficult circumstances and told to create a legacy? like hello? universe?? am I a joke to you? Being expected to take responsibility for something or someone. Having pressure constantly put onto you. You become the hardest worker, and then still being messed with? Like oops there’s no reward, do it again. Why are you surprised, you’re saturn’s puppet. The truth is the universe got your back. Reminds of me of Eminem (he’s a cap north node), see how he beat all odds and became one of the greatest? a role model both in his field and as a father. You show people that nothing is impossible. Those lessons become your greatest gifts that guide you to build a stronger and unshakable foundation. Break free from that shell you're used to, you EXPAND beyond that. You're here to be self made, rags to riches. 🎖️✨
Recognize the invaluable qualities you got, the talents, the unmatched energy, the patience, ambition, determination, the caring heart and courageous spirit. Give that respect to yourself FIRST, respect your core values and be proud of what made you. Saturn wants nothing but mastery, it’s your soul that craves mastery this lifetime. 🪐💫 You're learning to build your own safety, at home and in the world, and create your own rules. Let go of your cancer south node tendencies of clinging to the past, repeating mistakes because of childish insecurities or your need to be needed and respected by others. Nurture and provide for yourself by stepping into the world as a self sufficient, disciplined, and goal oriented adult.
Realize that all those difficult experiences happen to help you let go of the past, to build a stable and balanced emotional world. One thing for sure, nothing can stop you, setbacks and failure only fuel your motivation and life force. Rest assured you are promised the respect you yearn for, the success, stability and comfort you dreamed of. You’re one of the most resilient people, unforgettable. Your life story sparks a drive in others to chase their dreams, it inspires more people than you know. The generation will never be the same after you. When you get tired, you can slow down, but remember that everything you need is within you, never doubt that.
Scorpio north node.
Rulers - south node: venus, north node: mars and pluto
How does it feel like having to endure major losses? Having things constantly crashing down before you? Having to fight addictions, destructions and oppositions from everywhere? Not getting a hold of any sense of stability. Feeling like what you chase is escaping you. Experiencing betrayals and having people bring you down, waiting to see you fall. Being the one to blame and villinize when their shadows are triggered. Having no choice but to fight back and learn to survive. Your truth seeking and curious nature triggers many. You go to extreme lengths to find out the truth and seek justice. Your path being ruled by pluto, it removes that which is obsolete, unneeded, no matter how hard you hold into it. You have to be comfortable with the uncomfortable. Your path involves confronting your own shadow self. Survival and regeneration allow you to discover and become fully aware of your true power, limitless potential, and divine nature. “Unstoppable” by sia (she's a scorpio north node) narrates well this story of resilience. You're an alchemist of self, a transmuter of energy, a fighter in all realms. 🐉🔥
This restless mind of yours and psychic abilities you develop aren’t for nothing, they're gifts to help you surrender and trust the universe, the one thing you can't seem to do. You are the butterfly, always cocooning, always emerging. Your life path is a series of metamorphosis. Like a butterfly you're turned into liquid, dissolved, before you choose to spread your wings and fly. 🦋✨ The universe is teaching you that nothing is constant, everything changes, and our innate value as a soul doesn’t. Let go of the illusion of stability. You can choose to flow with the transformative waves instead of fighting them. It's okay to trust and rely on others too, accept it as a gift from the universe. Break free from your taurus south node ways of being too attached to material possessions. Putting too much value on material and physical pleasures won't help you evolve.
Embrace the spiritual side of our human experience, that’s what generates and creates the physical. The painful challenges you faced were meant to shift your values, for you to see and use your power for good. You have the potential to break generational curses and the responsibility to choose wisely between doing better or worse. You can become a great source of inspiration and comfort for others. Whenever I feel like giving up I literally look up a scorpio north node person. Just know that you can save lives. People confide in you, they share their deepest secrets and traumas and you inspire them to keep going because you understand that even the most terrible events will pass and bring about growth and beautiful rewards.
Aquarius north node.
Rulers - south node: sun, north node: saturn and uranus
How does it feel like being the different and outcast child? Growing up in a chaotic and unpredictable environment? Experiencing discrimination or being looked down at. Having situations and people try to humble you. Having your ideas, beliefs and findings rejected and misinterpreted. You're literally vibrating on a different frequency. You might be surrounded by a community or be totally alone, regardless, having a different mission can leave you feeling alienated. You've got an independent mind, you're an innovator, bringing all that's new and futuristic to the world. 🛸✨ You show people different ways of thinking and doing things, breaking and setting trends. Your desire to be a social activist, a scientist and a humanitarian helps us progress. Being ruled by uranus, expect the unexpected, all sorts of twists and turns, don’t be too attached or take things personally and react from your ego. When you embrace your uniqueness, not try to fit in, and do things for the greater good not for validation, you align with your mission. You're a voice for others and that's a responsibility not to take lightly. 
While staying true to yourself, broaden your vision beyond what only affects you, recognize that we're all interconnected. You must learn to share the spotlight and celebrate all others. Let go of your old leo tendencies of extravagance, self importance and self serving behavior, they’ll only pull you backwards. We progress together and you are a catalyst for evolution. You have a deep connection to the earth and the universe, honoring your place within it. You're perplexed by those bums that lack decency and humanity and carelessly harm this earth. Sza, one of my fav artists today got an aquarius north node, and she embodies it well. If you're familiar with her story, you'll know she comes from a different and diverse background, her music style is distinctive, her interests are weird or unexpected, and her humanity and empathy make her relatable and admirable.
Your mission is so important my love, no one can do it but you. Your ability to see solutions beyond conventional teachings are gifts to the world. You recognize that everyone is unique, you celebrate their differences, and encourage individuality in others. People like you are the ones that awaken this world from outdated ideologies and conditionings. It's why this is one of my fav north nodes, it drives us forward by seeking freedom and authenticity, rather than conforming. You are a radiant shining star that holds much needed hope for everyone. 🌬️⭐️
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silveryhill · 2 months
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Alain Prost: Still, even as it turned out, it was a fantastic story, don’t you think? And I think, in a way, we’re missing a little of that today. (Motorsport, 1998.10)
There's a metaphor abt Senna's helmet in the vid. Inspired by an interview from Nuno Cobra(his coach)
it's possible to say that Senna had that kind of split personality. On the one side you had Ayrton, who is sensitive, loving, sweet, poetic, romantic, wise and careful. On the other side, there was Senna, who is explosive. Senna was very nervous, very agitated, stressed, bad tempered. He was often compromised and challenged. I think Ayrton suffered a lot in the hands of Senna.
So Ayrton was the human side of Senna. When he put the helmet on, he turned into a “stranger”, the ruthless Senna.
And before the imola accident, Senna took off his helmet in front of Alain.
On Saturday, after Roland Ratzemberger's fatal accident, that was not the Ayrton I used to know, he was really worried...
On Sunday, at lunch time, he went to see me and simply didn't say anything important. Everybody was watching that in slience. It looks like he just wanted to get close to me. And I really feel that he's so weak. That was the first time I saw him like that...
On that Sunday I thought, that's not Ayrton. He's fragile. He wasted five or ten minutes to come to me and say nothing. And then he went back to the garage.
So I finished my lunch and went to his garage...
Ayrton's ritual was to be completely focused on his thing in the car. He never took off the helmet, it was the first time he took off the helmet(before the races). He was doing some stretching in the garage...
I didn't want to bother him too much but he wanted me to stay, it seems that he just want to share a time with me.
he was happy that I came there to talk to him, and that was the last time.
In their last six months, Alain met the REAL Ayrton.
"There were three Ayrtons for me: the one before F1 when he was looking at my races, at everything I was doing, the way I was doing it; obviously the one when we were together, inside or outside the same team; and then the one when I retired." It was this last version that Prost says he grew to like adding he wouldn't have believed it existed "if I had not known this person myself."
But Ayrton was Senna, Senna was Ayrton. They're the same person after all. So still, he put the helmet on and went to his fate. As Ron Dennis said, "it's his obligation." Like an addiction, and he "can't drop it."
Jackie Stewart once said:
Ayrton Senna was the most dedicated racing driver I have ever met. He was totally immensed in his life of being a driver. It was what he lived for. I would say that in a high 90% range of Ayrton Senna's focus on Motor Racing. Stirling Moss, when he drove, was a man who had other likes in life. Niki Lauda had passions in life, Jackie Stewart had, Juan Manuel Fangio had. Ayrton Senna, I believe, was more focused than any of the names that I've just mentioned.
So I think for Ayrton Senna, life, or love, is seldom enough, and that's why we admire him so much as his pure spirit of racing. It's a beautiful paradox. He's different.
*thank you for reading my way too long thoughts <3
*please don't repost it to any other platforms(like ytb), on tbr is absolutely welcome!
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lovebugism · 11 months
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Halloween is not really a big thing in my country so our october is as lame as every other month 😭
What do you think about sunshine/ditzy!reader planning her all on pink Halloween costume and eddie trying to convince her to go as something from one of his fav horror movies, or something silly like as a gremlin.
I love everything you write so I'll be happy with anything really
ily <333
ty angel! hope you like it! — eddie and his ditzy gf have trouble deciding on matching costumes (established relationship, fluff, ditzy!reader, can be read as a modern!au, 0.8k)
fictober (㇏(•̀ᵥᵥ•́)ノ)
“You don’t like my costume?” you wonder, all pouty in your pretty pink leotard and biker short duo. 
You’ve mastered the Barbie look — at least from what Eddie can remember. You’re only missing the neon rollerblades and matching yellow kneepads. You’re the prettiest, most vibrantly colored ball of sunshine he’s ever seen in his life.
“I love your costume, babe, don’t get me wrong…” Eddie assures as he rises from the couch, flashing you a rosy grin as he shakes his head. “But I am not wearing tights.”
Your pout deepens at his refusal to match with you. He was the Ken to your Barbie, after all — even if he wears so much black he basically absorbs all the light in any given room. “But why?” you ask in an unabashed whine.
“‘Cause if I knew I’d be wearing biker shorts for Halloween, I would’ve started doing squats three months ago.”
“But you’d make such a nice Ken!”
Eddie’s chocolate eyes narrow. “Do I look like Ken to you?”
“Well… No,” you answer, faltering only slightly when your gaze darts across the pale features of your wild-haired, metalhead boyfriend. “But it’s not like I look like Elvira!”
Eddie’s face twists like he’s tasted something sour, he’s that offended by your words.
His matching costume idea was the total opposite of your bright pink and sporty one. He wanted you to be a beautiful, shadowy thing hanging on his side in all black — the Mistress of the Dark to his Prince of Darkness. He still gets a little giddy thinking about it.
“Are you serious?” Eddie scoffs, playfully insulted and loud with it. His voice booms across the trailer as he takes you in his arms, curling his calloused fingers around your elbows. “You’re a total smoke show, babe— you’re killer. That’s, like, the only prerequisite.”
You roll your eyes at his compliment, though it has you blushing something fierce. 
Self-loathing was always hard with Eddie around ‘cause he thinks you’re the prettiest thing that’s ever walked the Earth. You’re not quite as certain as he is about it, but he says it with so much confidence that it’s hard to disagree.
“I do have a great set of boobs…” you lilt quietly, eyes flitted to the ceiling as you imagine yourself as the bombshell from Eddie’s favorite movie.
Your quoting of the film, along with your subtle reconsideration, has him grinning. “Yes, you do,” he affirms with a rapid and boyish nod. 
His gaze falls to your breasts, squeezed tight by the spandex fabric clinging to you like it was made to do it. His face heats with embarrassment when he notices he’s all but ogling at you. Then he realizes he doesn’t have to be embarrassed because you’re his girlfriend. It’s his job to ogle at you. It’s fucking metal.
“And an incredible pair of legs…”
“Exactly.”
“…But I still wanna be Barbie.”
Eddie’s grin never wavers. “Figured.”
“But you don’t have to be Ken if you don’t want!” you affirm quickly, eyes as wide as your glittering smile. “You can still be that weird, freaky singer guy that bit the head off that bat that one time.”
“Ozzy Osbourne,” he corrects.
“Yeah! We can just compromise. Easy peasy.”
Eddie deflates with a dramatic huff. His features twist in a puppy-like pout as he pulls you closer to him. “But you know I hate not getting my way,” he whines, mostly playful.
“I know,” you hum with a sympathetic smile. You gravitate towards him without thinking twice, arms wrapping around his shoulders as you press your chest to his. “But it makes sense, right? I’ve always been like Barbie, and you always liked me anyway… Right?”
He hates that you’re even asking — like he hasn’t been head over heels for you and stumbling all over himself since the day he met you. “I mean, obviously.”
“And you’ve always been a freak! And I’m, like, fucking obsessed with you—” you ramble, as bright as sunshine, until you realize the weight of your words. You grow abruptly serious. “No offense.”
He keeps on beaming like a lovesick idiot. “None taken.”
“And Halloween’s a cool way to represent that, right? Like, yeah, we’re different and we’re hot. Screw couples’ costumes!”
Eddie grows so suddenly fond. His chest warms and sparkles with it, like his dark eyes that melt for you. “Yeah. You’re probably right.”
“I know,” you shrug, still smiling. “I usually am.”
He grins wide before pressing a kiss to your smart mouth. It’s an innocuous peck — a meshing of plush lips and a lingering there. A quiet smack fills the tiny trailer when he parts from you just to pout, “You know I’m gonna have to walk behind you all night to keep people from staring at you, right?”
You giggle when his warm, calloused palms smooth over the outsides of your hips. “You do that anyway, Eds.”
“Well, yeah,” he responds, shrugging like it’s obvious. “‘Cause the view’s so nice.”
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seredelgi · 11 months
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Sweet Punishment
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fandom: Attack On Titan/ Shingeki No Kyojin
pairing: Dom!Levi Ackerman x Sub!Fem!Reader, Levi Ackerman x You
summary: Reader's relationship with Levi is everything she could've asked for, he's very sweet and never gets mad at her. There's only one little rule she needs to follow, and when she fails to, then he'll have to punish her.
rating: Mature, 18+
warnings: dom!levi, sub!reader, smut, like a lot, fingering, sex, vaginal sex, dubious consent (she enjoys it tho, believe me), spanking, blood (just a little cut on the lip, but still), unprotected sex (don't try it at home lol), penetration, manhandling (just a tiny bit, she's totally fine) vulgar language?, oh yeah, choking (no passing out), orgasm denial, slight degradation?, idk, this man has me feral, NO SPOILERS
word count: 4.6k
a/n: alright alright, last episode is out, and I'm just in love with Levi so I went down a rabbit hole of smut before deciding to write something down. It's just a scrap, I haven't put much thought in it so keep it in mind. Also, English is not my mother tongue, so go easy on me. Thoughts are in italic
tags: @imlevisoneandonlywife
Part 2
Your boyfriend is just so very good to you that it often makes you question how in the world have you gotten so lucky.
He’s known to be a man of few words, a true soldier, the best in what he does. You’ve never seen him in action, of course, but you’ve heard the stories and the way they’re being told. His subordinates tell them with a glimpse of ecstatic excitement in their eyes, his colleagues with a blatant silent respect. It’s honestly mesmerizing to see the effect he has on people.
But it is nothing compared to the effect he has on you.
You don’t need to see him slaying Titans to know he’s the best. He carries it wherever he goes, whatever he does, he has an aura to him that just draws you in.
And even though he’s perceived by everyone to be just a grumpy man, you get to see his sweetest side. Once Levi gets someone close to his heart, he becomes so severely attached to them that it’s almost suffocating. He showers you with his love and attention, compliments, gifts, simple little signs of his undying devotion towards you. And even though infamously ruthless on the battlefield, you’ve never seen him upset in your regards. Not that you’ve ever given him any reason to be, it’s pretty simple to please him. He’s not even the jealous type, maybe ‘cause he’s way too confident for his own good.
There’s only one little thing that he won’t compromise on.
Since the first time you two have had sex, he’s firmly stated that he wanted to be the only one to pleasure you, that not even you were permitted to relieve the tension on your own. It took you aback a little, but since he’d just managed to make you see stars you agreed.
Honestly, that decision has never truly bothered you that much, he was definitely worth the wait.
But now, as you're home alone waiting for him to get back home, you can’t stop thinking about him, about how good it feels to have him slide inside of you, and pump in and out with that effortlessly relentless pace he usually reserves you so kindly.
You try to focus on each chore you’re on at the moment, but anytime you try your mind seems to wander on its own, and you find yourself aching for him, catching glimpses of the clock hanging in the kitchen, counting down the hours that separate you from seeing him again.
You must be ovulating, ‘cause you feel so damn empty just thinking about him, needing to be filled so desperately it’s almost funny.
“ Just hormones” you huff quietly as you finish washing the dishes “ breathe, y/n”
You’ve never actually considered breaking Levi’s rules, you wouldn’t like lying to him about it. But right now his request just seems so unreasonable.
You eye the door of your bedroom from afar.
He doesn’t have to know.
It’s just one little slip, one little sin to remove a bit of the tension and be able to ease your mind.
For some reason your heart’s racing as you tiptoe silently towards the bedroom, sitting on your bed and sighing as you remember what happened in it the other night. Thinking about it makes you feel incredibly hot between your legs. You can feel your juices stain the white cotton of your panties.
You bite your bottom lip, considering if maybe you should just get up and get back to your chores, maybe put something up in the oven for dinner.
But it’s impossible when all it takes is for you to close your eyes and you can see him, holding you in his arms, leaving humid kisses down your neck, whispering huskily in your ear all the things he wants to do to you.
“ Fuck it” you click your tongue in surrender and place yourself laying back on the center of the mattress.
It’s his fault honestly, for being so ridiculously hot and impossible to wait for. And anyway, he’ll never know. You’ll make it quick. It’s still an hour before he comes back. Plenty of time for you to get off even more than once.
So you lean back and relax.
You close your eyes and he’s there again, looking down at you with hungry eyes, touching you all over your naked body. And as you imagine his touch upon you it’s easy, almost like following his orders, scanning your hands upon the warm skin of your breasts, your fluttering stomach, all the way down between your thighs.
You get rid of your panties, breaths quickening as you can feel his tongue sucking on your hardened nipples. Your whole body is aching so bad just thinking about it, yearning for his hands on you so bad it’s almost bruising.
As you part your legs and gently slip your middle finger between your folds a sudden cry of arousal breaks free from your throat. You just wish it were him touching you, his fingers sliding silently inside of you as you're doing now, gathering your juices before slipping out of your entrance again to bring them toward your clit.
You’re so incredibly wet. He’d surely comment on it if he were here, mocking you for how desperate you look for him. It would be embarrassing if it didn’t turn you on even more. And now that your fingertips are finally massaging your bundle of nerves, that agonizing tension you’ve been feeling all day just gathers in your lower abdomen, ready to let loose.
You’ve been horny all day, so it figures that you’re already so close.
It’s shameful, but it’s true.
Your free hand grips your sheets so hard you think you’ll have to iron them again if you don’t want Levi to notice. But that’s not your concern now. You’re lost in your lust, eyes shut picturing your man sliding inside of you with his cock, whispering all kinds of dirty prayers into your ear. It’s almost as if he’s there.
“ What do you think you’re doing?”
You take a few instants to realize that it’s really him asking you that, flesh and blood in your room, standing by the door and looking at you with the kind of gaze that you’re sure would send any reasonable man a shiver running down their spine.
“ Fuck- Levi” you pant, your hand coming off of you in a spurt, hoping in vain that he won’t comment on it, that he’ll let it slide “ I didn’t hear you come in”
His silver-grey eyes don’t come off of you as you sit at attention, closing your legs and trying to gain some composure. Your mind spins so fast it takes your breath away, your heart stammering loudly in your chest as he clenches his jaw.
He’s standing there, mere meters away from you, his uniform still on, a severe expression darkening his beautiful features.
That’s impossible not to find hot.
“ Yeah, that much was clear” he hums, and by the tone of his voice it’s difficult to determine how actually mad he is, being it the first time you ever break that rule “ So this is what you do when you’re home alone, huh?”
“No it’s not like that, I was just-” you don’t know why you’re so fast at trying to justify yourself when you know full well you haven’t done anything wrong.
You should tell it to him straight. That he doesn’t own you. He might be the best fighter in the known world, a Captain of the Scouts Corp, but that doesn’t give him the right to exert control over your God damn body.
But the words die in your throat. It’s suddenly really hot in there, and you’re still very fucking horny. You’re ashamed to admit that you find yourself quite attracted to this side of him, one you’ve never had the pleasure to fully unravel.
“ Just what? Trying to have fun without me?” he’s finally moving, walking towards the chair in front of your bed, getting rid of his jacket and placing it tiredly upon it.
“ Just warming up for when you came home, honey” you sound so out of breath, and you’re trembling.
You don’t actually think he would do you any harm, and yet his eyes suggest otherwise, his demeanor exudes danger from every pore. If that’s just a hint of the coldness he carries himself into battle with, then it’s no wonder fucking Titans fall at his feet.
“ You know that’s not how it works” his voice is low, steady “ But maybe you need a little reminding”
A hint of mischief lightens up the tension, and he starts walking towards you, slow and lethal like the man you know he is.
“ I didn’t even finish, I swe-”
But you’re cut off by his sudden movement, a quick dash to get a hold of your face, squishing your cheeks together with a hand, he gives you the kind of look that shuts you the hell up and gets that familiar tickle go wild between your legs. You subtly squeeze your thighs together to give your pussy some kind of attention, disobeying right in front of him kind of getting you off now.
“ I’m the only one that can give you pleasure” he almost growls at you, and his hold is so strong it’s bruising you now “ Understood?”
“ Yes, Sir” it’s all you’re able to reply, mind too foggy to gather anything else.
But it looks like he likes it, ‘cause he lets you go, a hint of a smile playing on his lips.
Levi Ackerman doesn’t smile easily. So you guess you’ll call him that in the bedroom more often.
He sits on the edge of the bed, and you’re almost disappointed, thinking he’s already done with you.
“ Over my lap” he instructs instead “ Now”
You’re kind of confused about what exactly he’s got in mind. But it doesn’t look like a great idea to ask out loud, so you find yourself complying, crawling towards him, legs a bit shaky from the missed orgasm you almost managed to give yourself.
You get within reach of him, not sure how he wants you to position yourself.
“ How do I-”
But you’re cut off again by his hand reaching for your wrist, tugging you forward, and having you stumble upon him, ending up stomach flat against his thighs. You resist the urge to whine in protest, sensing he’s not keen on you speaking up right about now.
You feel the light fabric of your sundress being roughly lifted up your ass, revealing to him your nakedness.
He sits in appreciation of the view in front of him for a few instants, and you’re feeling every nerve-ending on your body standing at attention for what he’s gonna do next.
The first slap makes your heart skip a beat, you hold your breath and close your eyes shut, and somehow you still manage to hold in your cry of pain. It’s sudden and disconcerting, and it kind of feels wrong to stay silent while he takes such liberties with your body, and yet it makes you squirm in your place to feel more.
The stinging that comes from the second one is even better, ‘cause you’ve expected it, and the high that comes next is kind of inebriating to your drunken senses.
Oh God, you’re so down bad for this man you’ll let him treat you like a disobedient child.
With the third one you can’t help yourself, you cry out in pain as the burning sensation gets your insides in a twirl, while the aching between your legs won’t stop growing desperate by the second.
“ I told you couldn’t do it” his voice is hoarse now, the sound of lust tainting it so clearly it only makes you hornier “ Don’t I give you enough pleasure? Enough attention?” he slaps you hard, and yet it’s not hard enough for you to feel the vibrations of your thighs giving you some kind of relief from the tension you’re holding up between your legs “Are you really that needy?”
You muffle a protest, almost crying from how much you feel desperate for him to touch you, but you don’t dare ask.
Luckily it’s like he’s in your mind, ‘cause you feel his hand suddenly stopping from imparting you that sweet punishment, only to make its way between your reddened thighs, finding your liquids covering their insides, and it’s so good to hear a falter of genuine stupor in his voice as he appraises how wet you are from what he’s doing to you “ Fuck, you really are, aren’t you?” he murmurs, and you can almost feel him licking his lips as he comes to touch your hole now, finding it drenched with your juices “ You’re a fucking mess”
You really are. Your liquids are audibly enveloping his fingers as he sinks them deep into you without much effort, your walls sucking him in. You let go of a sigh of pure ecstasy as you finally feel him fill you up as you’ve longed for all day long. It’s not enough, you want his cock balls deep into you, but you don’t think you’re in the position to make any requests right now.
His desire is undeniable at this point, you can feel it poking at your stomach as he starts pumping his fingers into you, so slowly you’re sure he wants to kill you with this fake kindness. Having his erection pressing into you like that is torture too. He must know that’s what you want. Heck, he seems horny enough to give it to you now, and yet he refrains. What is he up to?
“ You’re so fucking spoiled” he comments as his fingers start pumping at a much higher pace, getting to that spot inside of you that he knows how much you like “ Can’t even wait an hour for me to get home, huh?”
You’re so undeniably turned on, and yet some kind of rebellious part of you hates to let him know so blatantly, and has you trying to refrain from making too much noise. But it’s almost impossible. It would be so much easier to say you’re sorry and have him shift back into his normal tender self, but you’re high on this, and it feels like a waste to have it stop right now.
“ What’s this?” he asks, his tone slightly irritated by your sudden attitude, and you have to put all your efforts into stopping yourself from whimpering when his hand slips out of you so suddenly it makes your whole body shiver “ The silent treatment?”
He reaches for your lips with his other hand, the one that’s not covered in your liquids, and he parts them slowly. You’re too slow to realize what he wants to do, and before you know it you’ve got his thumb inside your mouth and the rest of his fingers holding your neck, lifting you from where you lay on top of him, making you look into his dark grey eyes.
“ Apologize now, and I’ll be gentle”
You don’t want gentle. Not anymore. And neither does he. You can see it in his eyes, he’s hungry for more, he just keeps it together better than you ever could.
“ You fon’t- owm’e” your muffled words were meant to sound challenging, but your eyes, you’re sure, they’re begging for him to fuck you, and this facade of yours is practically ridiculous.
You know ‘cause his smirk is chilling, amused by your pathetic attempts at making this interesting, when really, all he wants is for you to beg him to give it to you.
“ We’ll see about that”
He shoves you back down on the mattress, slipping his thumb out of your warm mouth before getting up with his knees pressing down on the bed and going for his belt, and you can’t help your eyes from lingering on his hurried movements as he lowers his pants and boxers just enough that you can see his cock finally popping out, and it’s so hard it’s almost threatening.
You knew he was just as impatient as you were, finding you getting off on your bed with his name probably escaping your lips must’ve been a treat he wasn’t expecting to stumble upon. But seeing it made you even more eager to feel it inside.
He crawls on top of you so that he’s all you can see, but he’s all you can ever see when you’re this horny.
You lunge up towards his lips. He still hasn’t kissed you, and by now it feels natural to want to, but he dodges you, making you almost pout in response.
“ There are no kisses for bad girls”
That’s so unfair you almost give in on the spot, the apology nearly rolling off your tongue so that you can be able to taste his inside of you.
Instead, you start kissing his neck, but he takes you harshly by the throat and presses you hard into the mattress.
Fuck him, he’s playing dirty.
He presses a knee down between yours and has you part your legs so easily it’s freaking frightening. If it weren’t for the fact that he lowered himself upon the skin of your neck, pressing his cock on the center of your cunt you would be complaining to yourself about how much control he has over you. But you like it too much to really care.
He starts kissing your neck slowly, so slowly it feels like torture, and his hips start rutting against your dripping core at the same dangerous pace. He can kill you with all of this, gentle when you want hard fucking and bites and marks to last for days. And yet it’s enough pressure, enough contact to leave you on the edge, enough to feel like crying with frustration. He’s already brought you so close with his hand before, and you almost came on your own before that, you’re practically holding on for dear life at this point.
“ Levi-” you can’t help but sob in his ear, feeling his breath grazing upon your warm skin as he answers you, his voice a delicate purr:
“ Yes?”
“ Please- fuck” you beg, dignity be damned. You’re a whore for this man, who are you even kidding?
“ Please what?” his tip is slowly pushing inside of you, only to slip out again as he teases you, and you think he’s never been so damn cruel to you in bed. It’s intoxicating how much you’re liking it.
“ Please, please, Levi, fuck me” your voice is so distorted by need that it’s practically unrecognizable, and the kind of chuckle that he ghosts upon your skin when he finally decides to stop playing with you would have your blood run cold, wouldn’t it be for the hotness of being surrounded by him with so much desire.
“ As you wish” he only says, before finally sliding his whole length inside of you, one deep thrust and you’re fucking screaming into the void of the room, clinging to his back and begging to the Gods above for it to never stop.
He’s finally fucking you as you wanted, deep thrusts crashing against your aching clit, your juices dripping down on the freshly clean sheets of your bed to create a pool of delicious wetness beneath you two.
He raises, towering over you, and he’s just so damn beautiful that he looks unreal.
“ Apologize” he orders again, this time you can hear the slightest little falter in his voice as he pumps in and out of you without mercy, still holding you down against the mattress by the neck.
Heck no.
You can’t risk this stopping now that you’re finally filled with him, now that you’re so close to getting what you’ve wanted all day.
You find the strength to shake your head no.
You catch a glimpse of indignation glinting in his eyes, something so fleeting it’s gone in an instant, but it’s impossible to feel scared when every single movement of his is sending shivers down your spine, and each thrust against your clit brings you one step closer to fucking paradise.
You’re already so close, and you’re so drunk on pleasure that you’re way past feeling shameful for it. You’re a babbling mess and you just love it.
“ Don’t you dare come” he threatens. His voice rasp, his breaths quicker and you feel something twist inside of you. He can’t do this to you. He can’t play with you like this. It’s simply evil.
“ Please” you whine, your voice a whisper, your eyes teary, his hold on your neck starting to limit the amount of air being able to reach your lungs. You feel like passing out like this would be heaven on earth. But you want to cum first.
He can’t rob you of it, not after all that you’ve let him do to you today. So you’ll come and hope for dear life to be able to refrain yourself from making it obvious.
You can feel your walls clenching around his cock, any thrust of his could be the last one, before-
Fuck. He can’t be serious.
He slipped out while you were almost there.
He’s nuzzling his nose against your neck, leaving little bites on your impatient skin as you cry, only able to complain.
“ I know you too well by now, love” he murmurs silently on your skin, his hand on your throat finally coming off, making you able to breathe in properly “ I can feel when you’re close, you can’t fool me”
He raises his silver-grey eyes upon you, and they’re filled with dark intents, so dangerous that your heart skips a beat.
“ Now apologize” his voice is firm, and his tone is so low it almost feels like a threat. This time, you know, if you don’t he’ll walk away on you. And you can’t have it.
“ I’m sorry” you finally give in, tears running down your cheeks, a pathetic mess, desperate to feel your man filling you up with his cum “ I’m sorry, Levi, please”
He sighs as if annoyed by all of this.
“ Will you ever disobey me again?”
“ Never, fuck- I swear” you’re too fast to shake your head no to that, giving him up any control he wanted over you and your body “ I will never touch myself again, I promise, Captain”
Much like the ‘Sir’ you had uttered before, this too sends a proud little sparkle flying in his irises, and at that he falls apart too, kissing your neck violently and sinking inside of you again, revealing himself just as lost in his desire as you are.
“ You’re so hot when you beg me” he chants upon your skin and you shiver as he bites your neck and sucks onto your tender skin, making you moan his name so loud you’re glad you don’t have any neighbors “ I love it, fuck- I love you”
It’s not often that Levi throws those words at you, and any time he does it feels like you’re golden in his hands, like you’re the last meal for a starved man.
His pace has become relentless, and it’s breaking you apart.
You meet his eyes, and this time around there’s no more coldness in them, no more anger or attitude of any kind, his features have softened underneath the burden of pleasure, and his eyes are so full of love it makes you hold your breath and cross your legs around his waist, keeping him so close you can feel his heart beating underneath his chest.
At times like this you can’t believe he’s yours, can’t believe you get to be fucked by the best soldier humanity has ever seen. You’re blessed. So what if you can’t touch yourself? All of this is just so worth it.
“ Can I kiss you now?” you ask, breathless.
He looks down on you with a hint of stupor, as if he were surprised that right now, a step away from your orgasm, you still look for his lips. And then he crashes down upon you, kissing you as if he hadn’t in years, as if there is no one else in the world.
You’re washed over by a sense of ecstasy, it runs throughout your whole body as you chase your relief, and when you finally break apart, you start shuddering against him, crying his name in his mouth, thanking him for everything he’s making you feel.
“ That’s it” you hear him in the background of your pleasure, praising you upon your feverish skin “ my good girl”
And then he kisses you again, this time violent, ravenous.
As you slowly come down from your high a sudden pain makes you realize he’s bit your lip, and by the drops of red staining his mouth when he parts from you you think he’s cut it, his hand clasping around your neck again, his brows furrowed, his eyes upon you.
“ You’re mine, yeah?”
He asks it with a verge of doubt, a vulnerability he rarely grants himself, usually when it concerns you.
It makes your heart ache and you kiss him again, the ferrous taste of your own blood corrupting the delicious one of his lips. You find it astounding that he even feels the need to ask you this, especially after all that has just occurred, the way you’ve let him dispose of you. Whose else would you ever be?
“ Only yours, Levi Ackerman, always”
“ Fuck- I’m so close” he pants.
“ Cum inside of me” you beg him quietly, and he sets you free of the hold on your neck and crashes down on you, slipping his arms under your shoulders and keeping you so close to him he could probably break you.
“ You want it in your pretty pussy, huh?” he asks, his voice croaking with pleasure, it almost breaks from how close he is.
“ Yes, Sir”
That seems to do it, ‘cause he lets out the kind of groan you’ve learned to recognize as he holds you to him, his movements erratic, his breaths hot and heavy against your neck, through your hair. He slams a hand on the headboard to keep himself steady, and you see his face twist deliciously as he’s overcome with pleasure.
“ Fuck” he swears as you feel his hot seed springing into you, filling you up as you’ve longed for, and it’s just perfect. You love feeling him emptying inside of you, it makes you feel fulfilled. It drives you.
He towers above you for a few more instants, his heavy breaths crashing down on you, lips still red from your blood. Then he comes collapsing beside you, still dressed in his uniform, even though some of his buttons have accidentally been undone in the heat of the moment.
You lay silently for a while, the high of passion slowly taming as you both wrap your heads around whatever has just happened. You’re kind of shocked. You honestly did not think you would be into any of what’s just occurred, but he’s just too hot to be denied.
“ Maybe I should try to masturbate more often” you casually throw the words in the silence of the room, hoping to elicit a laugh from him.
Long shot.
“ Don’t you dare” he threatens instead.
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velvetures · 7 months
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COD AU: Intro
AN: I love this. I have so many thoughts in my head. So many it’s killing me inside. Please enable me. God I hope at least one of you likes this enough to talk to me about it. To hc, to literally just share my words with. And yes…. There is a very heavy Ghost/romance element… but I’m totally not against picturing the other options ahaha.
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So I’ve been thinking….
An AU where everyone needs to lay low for a while. Maybe they’re all compromised and someone with enough power and money shows interest to take out the 141 forever. And Laswell, being the problem solver that she is, suggests a safe house of someone close to her. Someone who can be trusted. Not just to provide somewhere physically safe, but also keep a close eye on the team while they’re -somewhat- forcibly being cut off from the world.
So the team are flighted into the middle of god-knows-where in the mountains. A tiny little town -if you can call it that- and they meet their contact.
Not only a girl… but civilian.
She refers to Laswell as Aunt Kate and the Captain and Uncle John. Sweet as can be, and so damn helpful that it’s almost infuriating. Especially to Ghost. She hasn’t seen a single thing about them other than what Laswell has offered, and really appears like she couldn’t care less about opening her house up to them. A house just big enough to fit all four men.
Ghost isn’t sure about the whole thing. It feels wrong being holed up in the deep holler of an Appalachian mountain with a girl not twenty-five. Like some kind of fucked-up movie he wasn’t aware of being cast for. It’s all too strange walking inside her house and seeing photos on the walls, a massive rack of cast iron skillets and pots hanging above her kitchen island, and the way she looks at Price so fondly.
Uncle John…
Something about it rubs him wrong. There’s got to be history there… at least enough for her to feel the right to call Price that. But he’s never heard of her before. And this kind of arrangement isn’t one to taken lightly. There are people hunting the 141… A threat so well documented that they couldn’t even just turn a blind eye and wait for the smoke to clear.
The sweet thing doesn’t notice Ghost’s apprehension.
But she does recognize Price’s excitement in seeing her, as well as his slight disappointment that she’d offered to do this. She’s too good to get involved in matters of war, and he’s honestly surprised that Kate let you. But then again, there could only be so much disappointment he could find in seeing his goddaughter. And funnily enough, there’s a sense of relief he has in seeing how well she’s done for herself since he saw her last.
Intelligent, scarily so. But not in an overt way. He can see it in the way she collects rainwater for watering the little garden out back, and the pistol safe tucked under her bed with a thumbprint scanner. He notices the small town she’d bought her home in, and the relatively tight community. Maybe a little old-fashioned… but it’s good in case something goes wrong. And right now, it’s paying off.
Unbelievably welcoming too… but Kate and John always knew there’d come a day when she’d get a chance to ‘mother’ someone. And now she’d have four men to do exactly that for. Even from day one, she’s already made trips to the store, rearranged her whole home, and bought god-knows-what in anticipation for their arrival.
What’s each of your favorite food, I’ll make lists so I never run out of dinner ideas.
Any preferences on how I should come and go around my the house? I don’t want to startle anyone.
Did you need anything you didn’t bring? If I can’t get it in town or online I’ll text Aunt Kate and have her get it…
She’s nearly frantic to get them settled, and everyone reacts in a muted tone of shock save for Price. He’s well-aware thanks to Kate about how excited she is… something about wanting to prove herself. And Jesus if it doesn’t make Price feel a bittersweet burn in his chest as he introduces her to the others. Seeing her wide eyes examining all of them without the slightest hesitation. Memorizing names and faces, and shaking massive, gloved, hands without missing a beat.
She’s got Soap wrapped around her finger on instant. Maybe it’s a big-brother feeling. One like Price holds for her. Since she’s younger than him -unlike his own sisters- there’s something of a chance to be one for a while. Soap almost instantly takes to her Appalachian lilt and bright smile. They’re both too sweet for their own good at times… and Price can tell right away there won’t be a knife sharp enough to cut the two of them apart after this.
Gaz is quietly polite is a way only he can be. Meticulously trying to stay out of her way as she flutters about. Wanting to help her out, but also downright flustered when she demands she be the one to carry their bags to their rooms. It’s a clear sign he’s not used to it… A woman being this damn sweet and intent on ‘helping’ a man. But he takes it in stride. Learning how to help without stepping on her decidedly ‘southern comfort’ style of catering to them. And god if Price doesn’t have to chew the tip of his cigar when she gets on his ass about something. The poor sod looks like a kicked puppy… and he’s certain she’ll end up training him with due time.
Christ above. If Ghost isn’t the most difficult bastard to deal with initially.
He’s much more sour than typical. Lurking in corners, and unable to settle down anywhere for more than an hour. He looks caged in by the comfortable couch and throw blankets. Swallowed by her pleasantly creaky porch swing and sun-couch on the wraparound. Not even her well-used garage housing an old Fold flatbed makes a good refuge for Ghost. She’s all encompassing in a way he can’t come to terms with easily.
Price sees her trying the hardest with him.
The way her voice lowers when addressing him. How she makes a conscious effort to tiptoe around the house after 10pm because that’s when he shuts himself inside his bedroom… She doesn’t exactly know he never sleeps. Dinners are often served close to the time he finally realizes he’s got to come back inside the house… and without fail, she can be found sitting near him.
Not friendly by any means.
But more like a girl who’s found an old bait-dog at the pound and can’t leave well-enough alone. Sitting with her back it to and tossing treats over her shoulder. Hoping silently that the old, scarred, dog will come around. Damn near predatory in a sweet kind of way. Price can tell she means well. She can see the same thing everyone else on the team can… and she’s just going about it her way.
She’s good like that. Maybe a little too good.
But John can’t deny he enjoys seeing it. All of it really. The way she dotes on them individually. Consistently. Hell, she even does their laundry and bought separate baskets to keep things neat and tidy. The fridges -yes… multiple- all are set with their preferences in drinks, and she’s scarily observant when things need replaced. Toothpaste… shoelaces… socks… there’s no missing anything. Brands and sizes don’t seem to be a problem either, to some shock and mortification.
Uncle John, what’s Soap mean when he says he misses Irn-Bru?
His quick and unconcerned explanation goes without another notice… until he sees Johnny taking a long drink from a bottle of it while sitting on a rocking chair on the back porch watching some hummingbirds fight over richly dyed sugar water.
John’s often preoccupied with worrying about the plans of those head-hunting them and what Kate’s doing behind the scenes in the meantime. But it’s clear there’s nothing concerning his goddaughter but whether or not they’re all fed, warm, and comfortable in her house…
Whether Ghost likes it or not.
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Comments are so heavily appreciated on this… I want to make this more of what I talk about & I can’t keep it all on a notebook under my bed.
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cloudcountry · 2 months
Note
Fem cater w/ a reader who’s camera shy? Idk I’m thinking bout fem cater
SUMMARY: you're camera shy and cater compromises!
COMMENTS: i'm camera shy ourgh i hate pictures. everyone in my life loves pictures though so i try to be cooperative KJAGSDKASG
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Cater isn’t about to let a totally cammable moment with you go to waste, whether you’re camera shy or not! She’ll research different poses that leave her the center focus or have the both of you in the background somewhere.
She'll place her hands in the shape of a heart over your face if you’d prefer that, responding to any comment asking why she did that with “it’s a secret!~ <3”
It’s easy to take pictures with her, she’ll never judge you for any of your preferences. If you’re comfortable throwing up a peace sign with a close lipped smile, or holding some sort of book over your face, or hiding most of your body in her arms, she’ll do whatever it takes.
Honestly? I think Cater would just be happy to have someone to show off. You’re letting her take pictures whenever she wants to, regardless of the occasion (every day is an occasion, she thinks) and she loves you for it.
She loves you for a lot of other things too. She loves the way her shiny orange lip tint shimmers on your skin, she loves the way you giggle when her hair tickles your neck, she loves the way your fingers curl around your sleeves when you feel shy.
She loves the way you look in pictures too, so mysterious and beautiful, so lovely just like a rose from Heartslabyul’s gardens. Cater tells you so every time she wraps up one of her photo snapping moments, cooing over the pictures like they’re precious treasures.
Oh, and don’t worry, she’ll certainly save some loving for the real you too, showering you in tangerine flavored kisses and nuzzling against your warm cheeks.
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TAGLIST -> cater's cuties . . . @vivigoesinsane @identity-theft-101 @dove-da-birb
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sorrowfulrosebud · 1 year
Text
Thinking about:
Tokoyami being skittish and avoidant after the first few weeks of your relationship. Everything was amazing with him; he showers you in sweet compliments that leave you breathless, calls you sweet nicknames and always makes time for you. Now imagine your surprise when he starts totally avoiding you.
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The bell rings for first period, and your feathery boyfriend is yet to be seen. Anxiety started to gnaw at your chest; he hadn’t responded to your get well soon messages, only leaving you on read. You couldn’t even visit him properly since he gruffly told you to leave him alone when you tapped on his door.
It was not like Tokoyami at all, as communication was incredibly important to him in a relationship. Your anxiety bubbled over as you gnawed on your lip. Was this his way of breaking up with you? He had blown you off with plans for the last weekend too, making this a repeated issue. You knew you would get upset thinking about this, so you continued to scrawl down the notes from Aizawa’s lesson.
You mentally resolved to visit Tokoyami after the school day is finished and see just what the problem is.
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You gently tapped on Tokoyami’s door yet again, praying to whatever entity that he would let you in.
“I don’t wish to see anyone at the minute, please leave me alone,” you heard him grunt back lowly. He sounded pained and hurt, not to mention tired. You bit your lip in anxiety.
“Fumi? It’s me, my love. Are you alright? Please let me in, I’m so worried about you,” you pleaded him through the door. You heard a sigh.
“I’m sorry but not right now. I’m not well, and I do not wish to pass the illness on,” he continued, sounding more irritated by the second.
“I don’t care if you get me sick Fumi, I can take care of you and help you get better,” you compromised, hoping he takes the deal.
“Starlight, not now. This.. it’s a different kind of illness,-” Tokoyami was cut off by a series of coughs resonating deeply in his room.
“That’s it Fumikage, I’m coming in!” You announced, undeterred by his pleads and demands for you to stop. You gasp upon entering his room; black feathers were strewn across his bedroom in random directions and places. His lamps were lit, leaving the gothic bedroom in a ghostly light as you tried to find your boyfriend.
He was trembling in the middle of his bed, surrounded by a growing pile of feathers and trying to hide himself with his pillow.
“Fumi? Are you okay honey?” Your voice filtered through his room as you closed the door behind you.
“Why are you covering your face, love? Is something the matter?” Your worried voice drove a sigh out of Fumikage as he lowered his shield. You let out a slight gasp; he was moulting. His feathers looked sparse in some areas, some turned grey and some on their way to drop out his face. Even though his face was not one of a humans, you could almost see the bags under his eyes.
“Oh my god Fumi, what’s happened?!” You try not to let your voice get too alarmed; you didn’t want your boyfriend to think you were disgusted of him.
“I knew this would happen. It was foolish of me to think I could prevent it. It is a byproduct of my quirk: every few months I moult my feathers to make way for thicker and healthier ones, but as such it takes a toll on my body. I get hot flashes, and my feathers just drop out. I am usually plagued by insomnia, yet it worsens during this period of time. You must think it’s disgusting,” his voice quietens in embarrassment.
You let out a small “oh” upon his explanation, feeling stupid for your prior thoughts. You slowly made your way to his bed and sat next to him, rubbing slow circles to his shoulder.
“That’s not the case at all, my love! I had no idea that your quirk would cause this but it makes sense. I wish you would have told me about this. I’m here for you, I can help you face problems like these. It’s not a disgusting thing, it’s perfectly natural,” you comforted him, slowly grabbing his hand and gently rubbing in between the knuckle like you know he likes.
Tokoyami seemed shocked at your response. Any other person apart from Shoji usually made comments along the lines of “ew, I couldn’t cope with it,” or something. The politest would just give him a sympathetic smile that was tinged with disgust.
“A-are you quite sure starlight? This can be a troublesome task-” you interrupt him.
“Of course Fumi. Now, come here. I brought some supplies in case you were sick,” you rearrange yourself so that you were at the headrest of the bed and Fumikage curled up against you. You produced a bottle of his favourite flavoured water and held it to him as he shakily managed a few gulps. He let out a shaky and tired breath as he nestled himself against your chest.
Your hands found his silky feathers and Fumikage’s eyes burst open. It was foreign for him to feel someone so casually pet him. You worked in continuous strokes, gently setting aside any loose or broken feathers before petting him again.
Fumikage let out a contented chirp each time you found a particularly annoyed or irritated area. His natural bird-like instincts were screaming at him; his mate was grooming him!! Actually helping him maintain his appearance!! Making him feel better about his icky transformation!! It was a dream come true.
He nuzzled his beak closer to your neck and allowed his breaths to get deeper and slower, before totally falling limp against you.
And you know what? That was the best night’s sleep he had in 4 days.
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charliemwrites · 10 months
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Your keeper/kept AU has wormed it’s way so deep into my brain, I don’t think I’ll ever have sane thoughts about the 141 men again they were never sane to begin with
Speaking of Thoughts™️ lol how would a sort of “bring your pet to work day” go for Feral, Shy Thing and Good Girl where everyone goes on base? Kinda like family days or air shows :) OR maybe the safe house is compromised and it’s the safest place to bring them until the threat is taken care of? After all, there’s nowhere safer than at their keepers side on a heavily guarded base.
Hi! None of us have sane thoughts that’s why we’re all here, you’re in good company 😌 and thank you from bringing this brilliant Thought™️ to the table!!
Feral spends all day trailing after Simon. He sends her after recruits during training, and lets her climb all over him while barking orders. She’s utterly obsessed with his mask, cooing over it and clinging to his arm. People stare at the huge, terrifying 141 lieutenant with this little woman they’ve never seen (didn’t even know he was in a relationship) who does whatever she wants to him. And he allows it! Though if they stare too much she hisses and snaps - almost scarier than the LT, geez.
Shy thing spends the first half of the day in Johnny’s barrack, but she gets lonely and feels left out. So at lunch she ventures out and tucks into his side, stays close by. Thankfully most military personnel ignore her or only briefly acknowledge her. Seeing Johnny saunter around base barking orders and being so competent, only to turn around and dote on her…? Does things to her. Things that make her climb into his lap whining snd clinging at the end of the day. She really likes the way his uniform pants fit him.
Good Girl spends most of the day with Price in his office, sitting in his lap or cockwarming him beneath his desk. Shes quiet when he’s on the phone and takes her for walks around the base when she starts getting reckless. He takes her all over, giving her a tour, letting her bask in the tangential authority of being the captain’s. Total power couple. And he loves the number of people that look at her with yearning when she has eyes for no one but him.
Towards the end of the day, when all (or most) of the work is done, the three keepers (and Gaz) meet up to let the girls play. They take over one of the obstacle courses, giggling and helping each other through it, shrieking whenever one of them almost falls off. The boys keep up with them (it’s slow going) to make sure there aren’t any injuries or actual tumbles.
When they’ve finished, they all gleefully go to the communal showers, laughing and chattering and telling each other about their respective day. The boys guard the showers like its fort fucking Knox.
They also start whining and pleading when their keepers try to collect them to go home. They want to have a sleep over!! Please?! There’s a big tv in the rec room for movies and Johnny has a stash of popcorn… pleeeeease?
Yeah, not even price stands a chance against those big eyes.
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susiephone · 2 years
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i’m doing my annual reread of “gone girl” (happy women’s history month!) and as much as i ADORE the movie, both as a movie and an adaptation (seriously i think it’s one of the best adaptations i’ve ever seen), the book just has something to offer that i feel like couldn’t really be translated into film: the narration.
like yes there’s some narration in the movie, but films are a visual medium. for the most part, you don’t have the character tell us what they’re thinking, you show us via their actions. but a book, especially in first person POV as the book is (alternating perspectives between nick and amy), you have the benefit of having the character’s thoughts, and their actions, which can often hint at some stuff the characters don’t realize or don’t want to admit. especially because in the book, nick and amy are both aware they are telling you a story. they are both playing to an audience, they both know you’re there, and they both want you to side with them. and that is fascinating to consider as you read.
and we’ve all seen amy get made into this feminist girlboss heroine, and i know some people are joking (i mean, i joke about it), but some people are not. and that is baffling if you read the book and realize amy is also a complete misogynist. (actually she’s a misanthrope, she hates everybody, but she really has contempt for other women that doesn’t come up as much in the movie.) i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: it is a tragedy the book cut out hilary handy, because what amy did to her is an EXCELLENT example of amy’s lack of care for other women. 
the book also delves more into how amy, while brilliant and clever, is also not nearly as smart as she thinks she is, and she’s also a complete spoiled brat. the movie definitely mentions that amy was rich, but in the book, it’s clear that she’s never actually had to have job in her life (she does have one, but it doesn’t pay that well and it’s clear she could quit and live off her parents’ money any time she liked), and when she complains about being dragged “penniless” to missouri, she can still afford to not work and never has to think about the cost of gas. like she and nick aren’t RICH anymore, but they’re certainly not poor. amy in the book pays ten dollars for a carton of milk because she doesn’t realize she’s being overcharged. she expects $12,000 to last her nearly a year living in hiding, without actually budgeting (or rather, sticking to her budget) or compromising on comfort. 
furthermore, the book gets more into amy’s childhood and why she is the way she is, and also how her actions affect people who did nothing to her. the book spends a lot more time with her parents, who while not GOOD people in the book, get a lot more depth and really highlight amy’s callousness. the book does more to explore her psyche to make it clear that amy isn’t some super-cool ice queen mastermind who Does What She Wants; she’s on the edge of a breakdown basically 24/7, she’s a total hypocrite, she’s completely oblivious to her weaknesses and other people’s strengths, she’s motivated almost entirely by what others think of her, and her ego is both VERY inflated and incredibly fragile.
and in the book, amy and nick are perfect for each other. seriously. i have personally concluded that neither of them are capable of selfless or healthy love--except nick’s love for his sister, which is his main redeeming quality as a human being--but they do love each other in the most twisted, fucked-up, masochism tango way possible, and they’ll live miserably ever after because neither of them could ever be happy with someone else anyway.
like i get this stuff had to be streamlined or downplayed to make a 432-page book work in a single film. but i wish more discussion of the story was centered around the book instead of the movie, because i feel like when you have to cut down on stuff, some nuance and depth inevitably gets lost. and i wonder if amy would be as widely idolized and praised if the fanbase was centered more on the book than the movie.
tl;dr: if you’ve only seen the movie of gone girl, i implore you to pick up the book. it’s fantastic and makes an already stellar story even better. the audiobook is also excellent, although it did take me a couple chapters to get used to the narrator’s voices. they’re both FANTASTIC but it was jarring to hear nick as Not Ben Affleck and amy as Not Rosamund Pike 
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shawtuzi · 2 years
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i’m bored, high, and want my man eren rn so imagine with me rq girlies
cw include/// black coded reader, drug usage, oral f & m receiving, unprotected sex, creampie, big dick renny/// wc: 1.8k
OKAY SO!!! imagine being childhood best friends w eren and not to be cliché but he’s totally in love with you. he just loves you sm omg the way you’re so pretty and confident it makes his heart swell. the older he got the more this crush turned into a deep desire. he didn’t want to compromise the friendship of course so he kept these feelings to himself but it never got any easier especially since you’ve recently been more open about your sex life that is seriously lacking.
“so not only was the head wack, he was a one pump chump! fell asleep right after i didn’t even get to cum,” you sighed taking a long hit of the blunt you and eren were sharing. eren kissed his teeth shaking his head, “ion know why you fuck around with these lames y/n i keep telling you none of them are good enough for you.” if only you knew that eren could make you cum as many times as you asked and had stamina that could go on for hours on end </3 “of course you’re gonna think they aren’t good enough you’re my best friend and that’s you’re job,” you giggled passing him the blunt.
the effects of the drug were starting to kick in and you knew that because you suddenly couldn’t control any words that slipped from your mouth. “i just—i don’t understand how hard it could possibly be to eat pussy like even i could do that shit,” you dramatically sighed dropping your head on eren’s shoulder. “you just need to find someone who eats pussy for their own pleasure,” it was silent for a moment before he continued speaking, “someone like me.” you quickly lifted your head raising your eyebrows at the man in front of you, “you get down like that ren?” eren gave you a small smirk, “ fuck yeah i love eating pussy. hearing how good i make someone feel makes me feel good you know?”
you hadn’t even realized how much his words were getting to you until you felt yourself squeeze your thighs together and it certainly didn’t go unnoticed by eren. “why are you looking at me like that?” you mumbled staring down at eren’s fully tatted arm. you thought he was ridiculous for getting a sleeve but now it looked….kinda….hot??? “what? i’m not allowed you look at you now?” he chuckled bringing his hand to your face to squeeze your cheeks together. you swatted his hand away feeling your cheeks get hot, “you can look at me…just not like that.” eren’s smirk widened, “like what?”
the room suddenly began to feel very very hot and you didn’t know if it was the drug in your system or eren’s hard stare—shit maybe it was both (definitely both). “like—like that! i don’t know you’re just making me feel weird,” eren was supposed to be like a brother to you but you definitely couldn’t deny how handsome he’d gotten since you graduated high school. he’d grown his hair out instead of keeping it short and had a slight growth spurt going from 5’11 to 6’3 in the blink of an eye. he’d taken up smoking weed, got tatted up, and now he’s apparently getting more play than you ever have.
“well maybe i don’t wanna stop looking at you like that? ever think of that?” you didn’t know what came over you but next thing you knew your lips were crashing into eren’s. when you pulled away eren had a look on his face that you couldn’t quite decipher. he licked his lips, the taste of your cherry gloss making his mouth water. after a long silence you began to feel anxious negative thoughts beginning to cloud your brain. “you know it’s funny after all this time i thought i would be the one to kiss you first,” he chuckled putting out the blunt. “told you the way your were looking at me was making me feel funny and why do you think you’d be the first one? you like me or something,” you let out a small, barely audible laugh now tracing your finger delicately over the tattoos on his arm.
suddenly you were pulled onto eren’s lap, your chest pressed against his. “i do like you a lot actually but we can talk about that later yeah? just kiss me again,” he most certainly didn’t have to tell you twice as soon as the words ‘kiss me again’ left his mouth your lips were on his again. “go slow we got all the time in the world baby,” he mumbled against your lips taking your bottom lip in his mouth to suck on it. after what felt like an eternity of kissing and a whole lotta groping on eren’s part he pulled away, cheeks flushed and breathless. eren brought his hand up to your face, his thumb tracing over your bottom lip, “you have really soft lips—bet they’d feel good on my dick.” he shoved his thumb into your mouth pressing down on your tongue lightly,” you know what it’s like hearing about all those guys not satisfying you when i could’ve been doing the shit myself,” he tsked bringing his free hand to your ass to give it a squeeze. you wrapped your hand around his wrist pulling his thumb from your mouth, “then…do it let’s see if you’re all talk or actually ‘bout it.”
and to no one’s surprise eren was indeed a master with his tongue. he was practically making out with your pussy at this point, his cheeks flushed bright pink and the entire lower of his face glistening from your wetness. “so fuckin’ good,” he moaned into your pussy, pushing your body as close to his face as possible until he had little to no room to breathe. you were cursing yourself out in your mind so utterly pissed off that you went all this time without knowing that eren had an interest in you and that you could’ve been getting the best head you’ve gotten in years. he wasn’t afraid to be sloppy which you happened to like a lot and he could tell by the your moans became more high pitched whenever he would wrap his plump lips around your clit and slightly shake his head.
“e-eren?” you whispered, propping yourself on your elbows to get a clearer view of him. eren lifted his eyes to your face but never stopped the quick kitten licks he was giving your clit. “i think i’m ready to take you, it can’t hurt too bad right?” you breathlessly giggled becoming more antsy by the second to get a peek of what eren was hiding in those grey sweatpants. eren stood to his full height a teasing smirk gracing his lips, “pull em off,” he chuckled referring to the sweatpants that were hanging dangerously low on his waist. with trembling hands you hooked your fingers around the waistband and slowly pulled them down. you couldn’t hold back the tiny gasp that left your lips once you saw eren’a dick. here it was at a whopping eight and a half inches and it was scarily thick.
“eren this should be classified as a weapon,” you couldn’t help but giggle at your own joke making eren roll his eyes. “shut the hell up, now open your mouth i need to get it wet,” he grunted tapping the tip against your cheek. you parted your lips slightly and without warning eren shoved two fingers down your throat causing you to gag. once you had enough saliva built up eren removed his fingers smearing the excess spit on his dick. “i’ll go slow…for now,” eren chuckled pushing his tip between your lips already giving you a mouthful. eren had a shit eating grin on his face seeing you already begin to gag when he wasn’t even halfway in and now you were determined to show him you could handle it. you relaxed your jaw before taking more of him in your mouth using every method you heard of to try and control your gags. eren pulled the collar of his shirt between his teeth to get a better view and by god it did not disappoint. your eyes were brimmed with tears and your lip gloss was beginning to smear but he still thought you looked gorgeous.
eren wasn’t showing it but he was giddy as hell on the inside. he’d spent countless nights in his room fucking his fist to different scenarios of you and this was the one he thought of the most. him towering above you while you struggled to take every inch of his dick in your tight little throat. but he had to cut it short because he 1. embarrassingly enough was already close to cumming and 2. baby boy just wanted to be inside you. eren pulled you away by your hair making a mental note that he will have to pain your face with his cum in the near future. “i think it’s wet enough, lay back and spread your legs,” you did as you were told and laid on your back spreading your legs as wide as you could.
eren stepped between your legs and tapped the head of his dick against your clit a few times before slowly pushing the tip in. he brought his hand to your clit rubbing quick little circles, “shit did you—did you just cum?” eren groaned at the sight of your wetness tricking down his dick. “y-yeah sorry i didn’t know how close i was,” you whimpered bringing your hands up to cover your face. eren removed your hands from your face giving you a sweet smile, “nah nah it’s okay just boosts my ego even more,” he chuckled pushing himself in until he was at the hilt.
eren told himself he’d take it easy on you but as soon as he felt how warm and wet you were around every inch of him all that went out the window. he pushed your knees to your chest and began a brutal, rough pace using one of his hands to wrap around your throat. “stick your tongue out,” he grunted squeezing your neck just a tad. you complied sticking your tongue out, the second you did eren spit on your tongue letting it trickle down your throat before sucking your tongue into his mouth. “rennn,” you moaned pathetically against his lips, feeling yourself already about to cum again. “you better hold that shit ‘wanna cum together,” he groaned, shushing your whines with another kiss.
between you squeezing eren’s dick impossibly tight and the loud squelching of your pussy it didn’t take long for eren to reach his peak, thrusting roughly into you one last time before spilling himself into you. with eren’s pelvis rubbing deliciously against your clit you were right behind him soaking his thighs and the sheets below you in your cum. “i’ll buy you a plan b,” eren sighed dreamily nuzzling his face in your neck. “okay….you know we’ll have to talk about this when we’re sober and more awake,” you mumbled scratching lightly at eren’s scalp. “of course, just wanna lay with you for a little bit goodnight y/n,” eren whispered pressing a gentle kiss to your shoulder.
“goodnight eren <3”
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sagethegaywitch · 5 months
Text
Yandere Heartslabyul Headcanons
GN reader
TW: yandere behavior, killing mentioned, drugging mentioned, stalking
Genre: yandere
This is based on my own opinion and my knowledge of the game. I'm still stuck on Riddle's overblot and I just can't seem to beat him. :(
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Riddle Rosehearts:
Will use his power as Housewarden to create obstacles that prevent you from leaving the Heartslabyul dorm
Will enforce his strict dorm rules on you and will punish you accordingly if needed, but might offer you compromises like staying overnight or having tea with him instead of using his unique magic on you.
He might even go as far as creating a few new rules just for you, just so you can get in trouble and he has an excuse to offer you a deal.
If you try to leave him to either hang out with your friends or go back to your dorm, he will create little accidents to make you stay.
Oops, his foot slipped and accidentally released all the flamingos from their enclosure.  Now you need to help him rally them all up and return them to their pen safely.
Are you getting sleepy?  It’s totally not because he might have spiked your tea.  Maybe you should stay over tonight, you’re in no state to walk back to your dorm.
Similar to Trey, he’s quick to come up with methods to get you to stay.  But, he has some faith in you, and will let you leave his dorm occasionally.
While he does prefer you by his side, he understands that there are rules that prevent you from being close to him 24/7.
Curfew, you needing to go to your classes, and you needing to take care of Grim are some examples of reasons that will allow you to leave him for a while.
He also has his duties as Housewarden to uphold, so he doesn’t often have a lot of time to spend with you anyways, and he would rather you be doing something useful and educational than waiting for him.
While he may be manipulative, he can treat you right.  Your words will always be treasured and you will be granted your every wish.  He might even bend some of the dorm rules for you if he feels like spoiling you.
You want a specific dessert at a private tea party with him?  He’s already asking Trey to make 10 of them.
You want to have a chestnut tart at an unbirthday party?  Even though it goes against the rules, he might make an expectation.  He’ll come up with a condition like, “Chestnut tarts are allowed at a unbirthday party only on Fridays” to appease you and still technically follow the rules.
Overall Riddle can be a very loving yandere, as long as you follow his rules and stay on his good side.  He has a Danger Level of 7/10.  He won’t go as far as hurting or killing rivals, the most he’d probably do is use his unique magic against someone.  He’ll definitely use his dorm rules to ensure that they stay in line and might keep their magic sealed forever.
Trey Clover:
Will also use his power as Vice-Housewarden to keep you beside him most, if not all, of the time.
Will often come up with excuses like needing to bake an unbirthday tart or needing to find a unique ingredient to force you to help him out.
If you try to leave or make up an excuse, he will offer to help you with whatever you need.
Need to check on Grim?  Let him come with you, maybe he can take you out to a cafe to get a snack after.
It’s getting late, you should probably get to bed soon.  But, darling, his bed is always available to you.  His conscience would never let you walk back to your dorm alone in the dark.
He has an answer prepared for every excuse you could possibly think of, so don’t even think you can worm your way out of his sight.
Will only tolerate his close friends like Riddle and Che’nya to hang out with you (mostly because Riddle is his Housewarden and because Che’nya cannot be stopped half the time).
Might allow Cater, Deuce, and Ace to talk with you, but never more than a few minutes because then he starts to get jealous.
Often puts on a tight smile when he’s jealous and will drag you away from whatever you were doing or whoever you were talking to.
While he can be possessive and wants you by his side 24/7, he does have his benefits.
You will never be lacking sweets because he has a new dessert baked for you everyday.  Ranging from tarts, cakes, breads, cookies, and more, he’ll note what you enjoy and make them as frequently as he can.
You have some power over the Heartslabyul dorm members mostly because you can do no wrong in Trey’s eyes and he will use his power to threaten those that question you.
Overall, not the worst yandere to have if you don’t have many friends to begin with.  He has a Danger Level of 8/10, only really lashing out when people try to take you away from him.  He might have to slip them a tart that he made with some extra love…and maybe some poison.
Cater Diamond:
As a Magicam user, you can expect to be in every post that Cater makes.  He might even draw little hearts around you two before posting the cute selfie you two took.
What?  He put in the caption that your his partner?  No, no, he just means that in a “platonic” sense.  You’re both just really good friends…for now.
Almost never posts pictures that don’t have you in them because he believes they won’t perform well or go viral…or at least that’s what he tells you.
Will keep you close to him, ready to take a new picture when the opportunity presents itself.  Only will complain when you leave him for extended periods of time because you’re missing out on all of his best pictures.
He understands that you have your stuff you need to do, and he will usually let you go off to do your own things with minimal whining.
He only gives you your freedoms because he knows that keeping you trapped to him will only push you further away from him and his end goal of making you his partner.
Also, he prefers watching you from a distance and getting some nice pictures of you from different perspectives when you aren’t looking.
Loves taking pictures of you when you aren’t looking, but he never posts them.  These are for his private personal collection that he keeps in a locked folder on his phone.
Will stalk you when taking these pictures, hiding comically behind trees and bushes.  But he is very stealthy and you’ll never know he was there watching you.
Sure you smile when you take selfies with him, but he thinks your natural smile shines so much brighter.
His phone storage is often full because the sheer amount of his private photos of you outnumber the amount of his photos for Magicam.
Might even have some more personal pictures of you, like you stepping out of the shower with only a towel around you or you sleeping peacefully with Grim in the dead of night.
With his power as an influencer, he will make you a viral icon, but he can also get rid of competition as well.  He’s easily jealous, even if someone was just asking for the notes from class that day.
Oh, a classmate pestered you during class?  Suddenly they're getting cyberbullied.
He needs to get rid of some of your potential suitors or annoying friends?  He’s posting rumors about them cheating on their past partners, illegally drinking and smoking, and other scary crimes to get you to avoid them and stay with him.
Overall, Cater is very attentive and will always provide you with what you need.  He’s definitely more lenient and will let you wander off, but he’s always watching you from a distance to keep you safe.  He has a Danger Level of 9/10 mostly because he’s easily jealous when you talk to others and he’s quick and willing to ruin someone’s reputation.  He prefers not to get his hand dirty, but if murder is needed, he’s not against the idea.
Deuce Spade:
Let this poor boy love you, he’s so desperate to prove to you that he’s the best boyfriend you could ever have.
While he may act like a tsundere, he’s really just a big softy.  After he realizes he likes you, he stops acting all cold and tough, and becomes a stuttering mess when he’s around you.
Is a perfect and ideal yandere.  He gives you all the attention and affection you want, but he’s willing to be separated from you when you go off to do your own thing.
He is really trying to prove himself to you and will follow you around like a lost puppy.  He will often listen to your requests as a way to show that he is not clingy and will give you your rights.
He only gets really clingy when he gets jealous, like you’re hanging out with Ace too much or you’re too focused on your studies.
Will pull the cliché “I don’t understand this topic” to get you to study with him and hang out with him longer.
Will give you gifts almost everyday, whether they be small treats or a small knick-knack, he will work hard to make them himself before resorting to premade items.
Loves to make them himself because he believes they will mean more to you since he took time out of his day to make them with all of his love.  He will place a kiss on each item, squeezing it in his hands as he silently prays that you will like it and tell him he did good.
Might break some of Riddle’s rules for you, which gets him in trouble every so often.  But he’s never too upset about the collar around his neck because he made you happy.
He is one of the least dangerous yanderes because he doesn’t want to scare you off with his delinquent side that he left buried in his past.
Will only resort to violence and beating someone up if they committed a crime against you, something like hurting you physically or mentally.
Will not commit murder, but his victims might be in the hospital wing for a few months.
Overall, a very sweet boy, maybe too sweet, that may appear nonthreatening.  Your words are golden and he listens to you above all, even if it might get him in trouble with Riddle later.  His Danger Level is at a 2/10, only because he has the ability to totally floor someone if really pushed to it.
Ace Trappola:
After all the time you’ve spent with him and all the adventures you’ve enjoyed with him, he’s under the impression that you must like him.  Why else would you hang out with him everyday and spend the most time with him than any other student?
Even if you deny your feelings for him, he’ll just believe that you’re too embarrassed to confess and are trying to brush it off.  But he knows deep down that you love him, he just needs to break you out of your shell.
Is not the usual jealous type, in fact, he loves to show you off and wrap his arm around your waist when you are hanging out with the rest of the first year gang.
If people take your attention away from him, he won’t drag you away.  Rather, he’d drape himself over your shoulder, coil his arms around you, and continue to glare at the person you’re talking to as the conversation continues.  He won’t say anything, just stare with a darkened expression.
Will leave little gifts for you, but he’ll put them in the weirdest places.
How did this little cookie basket make its way onto your bedroom desk?  Maybe it was a gift from Malleus as a thank you for walking with him so late at night.
When did this nice lotion get in your bathroom?  You don’t remember buying it,. Maybe the ghosts are trying to play a prank on you.  Perhaps it's safer to throw it away than risk the outcome of a rude prank.
Will get all upset that you’re not accepting his gifts.  He thinks it's perfectly acceptable to leave gifts in your dorm because you two are clearly dating, but you just don’t know it yet.
While he may have the extent of your relationship mixed up, he can be very loving.
You have scary dog privileges when walking at night because Ace will hold you close and scowl at any "sketchy" people walking by.
You get endless gifts (even though you may not know they are from him) ranging from expensive products to little trinkets that he spent his own time and money to get you.
You will always have a study buddy if needed, and he’s more than willing to have you stay over at his dorm or stay over at your dorm if it means he gets to spend more time with you.
If anyone were to try and take you away from Ace, he’d probably be more willing to kill someone.
He might even employ Deuce to help him scare the person first and warn them from taking your attention away from him, but if the person persists, he’ll resort to other methods.
Would probably kill someone in a flashy way, like cutting them where they touched you and letting them bleed out in a public area to be found later by students or staff.
Overall, Ace is a more traditional yandere, giving him a Danger Level of 9/10.  He’s easily jealous, but he’s good at masking his emotions around you, which never allows you to know his true feelings.  Definitely has the wit and strength to eliminate someone if they rubbed him the wrong way or did something to you, and would make a big message out of it to warn others from doing the same.
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cinnamonest · 5 months
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Hiii I absolutely adore your work!! You're legit my favorite fic writer, every word you put down is gospel amen 🙏 If youre still doing requests, maybe what about albedo x tall reader? I love how you write him so much, im 6ft tall myself and am fiending for yan stuff for tall girls since tall women are always written to be strong and dominant which kills me inside since im the total opposite...
Luckily he's not really insecure about it or anything, not like one of those people who gets all neurotic and has a complex. It's just. You know. He wouldn't mind getting a bit taller, is all. But if he ever starts getting too hung up over it, the feeling then loops back to feeling embarrassed over being insecure over something like that, so he tries to just ignore any feelings on it entirely.
He does handle your greater stature than himself better than some other, more insecure short boys, though. So long as you don’t bring the matter up, he won’t either. He genuinely doesn’t care about having others poke fun at him, which some of the knights he works with certainly do, given that it’s not everyday you see a guy with a girlfriend so much taller than himself, but he has very little regard for the opinions of those he doesn’t care much about and is thus largely unaffected.
He does, however, care what you think. He’s the sort of person who buries any insecurities he may have and ensures he never brings them up or makes them known, but he does worry just a bit that you wish he was taller, that it compromises the respect you have for him, or worse, that you’ll get wandering eyes… he feels sick to his stomach if he sees you talking to some tall guy, even more so than the sickness he already feels seeing you talk to anyone.
And even if you tease him about the matter, he handles that very well, albeit with a twitching to his smile that you may notice if you look carefully. He wants to give off the impression that it doesn’t bother him, even if it kinda does, just a little.
This also ends up accelerating his obsessive tendencies, the insecurity gets to him and he acts more impulsively and more recklessly than he would normally, and you’ll find that the situation between you escalates much faster to the point of captivity.
Regardless, you have no need to worry. The man does not have a submissive bone in his body… unnaturally so, even.
Like you know how, as a general rule, most men tend to lean towards dominant tendencies and aren’t really submissive per se, but are still gonna salivate and get into it if you “take charge”?
He’s not even like that. The notion of you having any sort of control or autonomy in the matter sort of… bothers him. He’s too obsessively fixated on control, and uses sex as a catharsis by which having control and seeing that control actively exerted on you brings him satisfaction and comfort and assurance, so any bit of said control being taken away gets under his skin fast.
Enthusiasm would be a pleasant surprise, sure, he likes you participating, but any time you attempt to actively control the steps and movement, or gods forbid try to push him to do or move in the way you want, he gets a little… twitchy. He’s not one to vocalize his thoughts too much, but you notice pretty much immediately, you can tell it irks him that you’re moving too much on your own, based on the firm grabs to your sides and wrists and efforts to quietly contort your body the way he wants you to, and a heavy huff of frustration when you fail to comply or try to go back to the position you were in before. It feels wrong, you should be bending and moving to the way his hands and words guide you, and failure to abide by it only strengthens the intensity of the impulse to force you under it by any means necessary.
Should you be a particularly bratty type, you can use this to your advantage by intentionally continuously breaking out of his hold or pushing back against the way he tries to push you into certain positions and outright disobeying… but that’s one of those “playing with fire” type of behaviors, and it stops being so amusing when he’s got you on your knees, held up by a fistful of hair, looming over you with an ominous, icy stare… and you may find yourself regretting your defiance, and up may be the only direction you get to look at him from now on.
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negans-lucille-tblr · 7 months
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My Worthless Love || Part Two
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Summary: At first, Dean can’t believe his luck that he gets to date a porn star, but soon the cracks start to show, and Dean gets to see a totally different side to the industry that bursts his bubble and leaves him torn. 
Rating: 18+
Part Tags: angst, mentions of sex, being used for sex, hints of foreboding, fluff, romance, heart to heart
Part WC: 2753
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Your POV
You’re still thinking about your date with Dean as you sit yourself down at your dressing table in front of your vanity, reaching for your hairbrush to detangle your freshly washed hair. You sigh heavily, wondering if he’ll get bored of you soon enough, and knowing there’s only so many times you can expect him to be a perfect gentleman before he gets bored and finds a girl who isn’t an idiot and will fuck him on the first date. But you’d promised yourself this time it would be different. This time, the guy you date will be different, and the only way to ensure that is to make him wait. 
You think about that drunk guy you’d walked past who clearly recognised you, and you smile softly when you remember Dean moving to your other side to protect you from him. You remember Dean brushing it off as just a drunk man trying to hit on an attractive woman, and how he didn’t seem to bat an eye at any of the other men whose attention you’d grabbed that night or the two dates before that, either. Either you’ve been extremely lucky and Dean extremely naive, or he knows your little secret, and he’s just biding his time. 
In fact, you wouldn’t be surprised if the guy that works for him at his workshop – Justin you think you remember him saying – hasn’t pieced it together yet. Maybe Justin being a bit too friendly with a few too many women has been your saving grace this time. But it’s only a matter of time now. Dean’s going to find out eventually, and you’d rather that come from you. So maybe it’s time to come clean, and show him the side of you that you wish you didn’t have to. 
Your phone ringing cuts through the silence of the room and the noise of your mind, and you realise that you’ve only been brushing one section of your hair the entire time you’d been in thought. Clearing your throat, you put your brush down and grab your cell, sighing slightly at the name that’s flashing on the screen. 
“Hey, Dick, what’s up?” you ask, trying to sound more enthusiastic than you are. 
“Hey baby,” he practically cheers down the phone in his usual over enthusiastic patronising tone he always speaks to you in. “Listen, sweetheart, it’s been three days, pressure’s on to take this job.” 
You sigh heavily at the very reminder. You’d been so caught up in Dean recently, you’d actually forgotten about that. 
“C’mon, baby, you know the deal. You refuse this and the company won’t hire you again, that’s half your work gone,” he tries to push. 
“Dick, c’mon, you know I don’t like that guy,” you remind him, playing with a loose strand of cotton on your bathrobe.  
“We’ve all gotta do jobs we don’t like doing, Y/N,” Dick replies a lot more bluntly this time. 
“Dick,” you try to reason, already getting frustrated. “You know what he’s like… you’re meant to be looking out for me, not pushing me to work with assholes like that.” 
“No, I’m meant to be getting you work, but I can’t fuckin’ do that if you’re turning down scenes left, right and centre. This affects my pay too, y’know,” he huffs. “Just be a big girl, suck it up and do one fuckin’ scene with the guy, okay?” 
You purse your lips, not wanting to give in or even compromise, but you know that Dick is right. If you turn down this scene, then the company is less likely to book you for other scenes, and then you’ll barely have any work or money.
“Fine, but I want them to be clear on my limits list, okay?” you press, waiting desperately for Dick’s confirmation. 
“Sure, I’ll make sure they get it. I’ll send you the details for the shoot in the morning, get some rest.” 
You roll your eyes knowing he can’t see it and hang up, throwing your phone back down onto the dresser clumsily as you clench your jaw and try to calm yourself back down. Once again you focus on brushing your hair, moving on to applying your skin care as you try to distract yourself with thoughts about Dean once again. But it’s no use, Dick has officially put you in a bad mood, and the thought of your new upcoming job is keeping you on edge. 
Your phone once again begins to ring, and you’re just annoyed enough that you snatch it up without looking at the screen first. 
“What?” you bark down it. 
“Oh hey, urm, sorry, is this a bad time?” 
Instantly you relax a little upon hearing Dean’s voice on the other end, and you take a deep breath and pinch the bridge of your nose to relieve some of the tension there. 
“Sorry, I thought you were someone else, what’s up?” you pry softly, trying to remain calm. 
“I urm… I know it’s late, but I was hoping we could meet up and talk?” he asks awkwardly. 
“Dean, it’s almost midnight, we were together like two hours ago, what’s going on?”
“I just really think we should talk about something,” he tries again. 
Your mind is too much of a mess to figure out just what Dean might be talking about. Maybe he’s hoping a late night call will change your mind about not fucking him on third date. Maybe he’s finally ready to admit he knows your secret. Maybe there’s something else entirely, but either way, now you’re intrigued, and it’s certainly taking your mind off of Dick and your new job. 
“I don’t wanna get dressed up again,” you argue with a sigh. “Look, just come to my place, I’ll text you the address.” 
You figure your apartment is the best place to be. You can throw him out if the conversation doesn’t go the way you want it to, and it means you don’t have to make too much effort to get ready and go out at this hour. Though as you hang up, you realise you should at least put some clothes on under your robe, and maybe a touch of make up. The guy has never seen you not dressed up for a date, so he doesn’t need that shock at midnight. 
You text him your address as promised and settle for putting on some simple sleep shorts and tank top under your robe, hoping if you look ready for bed, he won’t take too long and will leave again once he’s said whatever it is that’s so important. Pouring yourself a large glass of wine, you figure you’ll need it as you try your best to relax on the couch and await Dean’s arrival, wondering just what the hell he might want to talk about.  
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As you sit and watch Dean bouncing his leg and looking around your apartment for what might be the hundredth time, you consider breaking the silence yourself, starting to get a little irritated that he hasn’t just spat it out already. 
“Really is a nice place,” he compliments for the fourth or fifth time; you’ve lost count now. “Much nicer than my apartment. Urm… what do you do again to afford something like this?”
As soon as Dean braves looking you in the eye after his bold question, you know exactly why he’s here and take a deep breath. 
“I think you know,” you reply softly, your heart beginning to thud just a little bit harder as your mind now begins to race, coming up with all the different ways this could go from here. You’re more disappointed than you thought you’d be at the prospect of Dean being just another guy that’s discovered your secret and wants personal gain from it. 
“I might’ve found out,” he confesses, clearing his throat and looking away as a blush begins to stain his cheeks. 
“And?” you prompt, not able to tell from just looking at him exactly how he feels about it. You’re still not even sure how long he’s known. 
“And I figured we should talk about it,” Dean counters. “Can I– Can I get a beer or something, my mouth is like… really dry,” he starts to fluster. 
“Sure,” you nod softly, getting up to head over to the fridge in the kitchen, glancing back over your shoulder as you watch him bouncing his leg even more violently than he had been. 
Clearly the guy is nervous about the whole thing, but he must realise he’s got the upper hand here, right? You’re the one that’s been caught out in a lie here – Not a lie, just a half truth, you remind yourself as you twist off the caps of both beers and make your way back over to the couch. You hand him his beer and smile nervously at him, before sitting back down, telling yourself that you didn’t exactly lie at any point about what you do for a living. 
You’d gotten good at avoiding the subject over time, and that didn’t change on your dates with Dean. You’d let him talk about his garage and fixing cars, and then distract him with more questions about himself before he could ask you what you do in return. And it’s not like you wouldn’t have ever told him. If things were going to start looking like they were getting more serious, you’d have come clean eventually. It’s just not exactly a good first date conversation, and you wanted to be sure that he actually liked you and not just the thought of you. 
“So how long have you known?” you pry, focusing on playing with the edge of the sticker on your bottle. 
“I found out tonight, after our date,” he confesses. 
“Was it that guy that recognised me?” you wonder, wanting to know just how you’d given it away. 
“No, but that and the guy walking into the door does make a lot more sense now…” he half laughs, though you can tell he doesn’t actually find it all that funny, so you’re not off the hook just yet. “I urm… well, I was kinda gonna… y’know… blow off some steam, and I accidentally found you.” 
Dean’s cheeks only turn darker yet, and you almost find it cute that he’d be so embarrassed about that given what you’re talking about and who he’s talking to. 
“I see,” you nod, finally understanding. You’re not exactly one of the big names, so you realised the chances of him finding you accidentally were slim, but not impossible, and if he really had no idea who you were before that, maybe this is some cruel twist of fate that he’s found out this way. “So, let me guess,” you sigh, sitting up a little straighter. “You found out what I do for a living and now you’re wondering why a professional slut wouldn’t even put out for you on the third date?” 
You realise that your accusation is a little crass and a whole lot unfair, but you’ve been down this road with guys before. As soon as they’ve found out about your job, they’ve changed. As much as you’d like Dean to be the exception, you’re not holding your breath that he will be. You bravely look him right in the eyes when he doesn’t immediately answer, noticing them widen at your question as he instantly shakes his head. 
“That’s not why I’m here,” he tries to defend.   
“It’s fine, Dean, you don’t have to pretend to be some Prince Charming, I’ve been here before.” You don’t even mean for your tone to be so aggressive, but it is, and you start to realise just how angry you are to be in this position yet again. Maybe you should give up on dating altogether, just accept that men only want one thing from you. At least then you can’t be disappointed.  
“What?” Dean frowns, his own voice starting to raise, his tone hardening just a little.  “I never said–” he cuts himself off. “Hang on, why are you the one that’s pissed with me? I’m the one that just found out that the girl I’m dating fucks men on camera for the whole world to see and she didn’t even tell me!” 
“But she won’t fuck you, right? That’s what’s bothering you about all this?” you argue back. “You know what, Dean? Fine, I’ll fuck you, let you have something to brag to all your little friends about, but don’t expect a fourth date after this.” 
You rise to your feet and pull the tie on your robe, letting it hang loose to expose your pyjamas underneath, and Dean also rises to his feet, now frowning even deeper than before. 
“No, that’s not why I’m here,” he insists once more. “Does it hurt my ego a little that you didn’t wanna sleep with me? Sure, but I’m a big boy, Y/N, I got over it pretty damn quick. What bothers me, is that you weren’t just honest about it,” he retorts. 
“Can you blame me, Dean?” you implore, feeling pent up frustration turning into something else – something sad and heavy in your chest. “This happens every time. In fact, I don’t know why I’ve not learned my lesson yet, maybe this is all my fault, after all.” 
“What happens, Y/N?” Dean presses, frustrated. “A guy gets upset because you lied to him?” 
“No, a guy I’m dating finds out what I do, and suddenly that’s all he sees… and it’s all he wants from me.” 
Dean opens his mouth, but no sound comes out yet. He shuts it again and takes a deep breath, looking down at the beer bottle in his hand before gently placing it down on the coffee table. He steps closer, and bites down on his plump bottom lip for a moment before opening his mouth and trying again. 
“Okay, I’m sorry, I didn’t think about it like that,” he confesses with another blush. “I guess I was hurt that I’ve been nothing but honest with you, and I thought you’d been the same. I’m not used to dating like this, Y/N. I’m normally the asshole that only wants one thing, but you’re different, and I like you… and I’m not just saying that because I know what you do now. If we’re being completely honest, normally I wouldn’t even have the patience to make it to a third date.” 
You giggle slightly at his brutal honesty, appreciating it far more than all those guys that just pretend to be different to the rest but really only want one thing. And there’s a sincerity about him that makes you believe him when he says he really didn’t know before tonight, and that he really did like you even before he found out. 
“I get it now,” he reassures you, stepping closer again. “You didn’t want me to be like them… and I won’t be… not with you.” 
“Please don’t be,” you beg him quietly, not even thinking about just how fragile and vulnerable it makes you to ask something like that of him. 
“I promise I like you for you, Y/N,” he confirms, “or I wouldn’t be thinking about a fourth date, or how much I wanna kiss you right now and then go straight home afterwards, just so I can prove to you that I’m different.”  
“So my job doesn’t bother you?” you check, feeling your own cheeks heat up. 
“I mean… I’d rather my girlfriend didn’t show everything she owns on camera while sleeping with other men, but… I’m also not going to be the guy that tells you to change for me.” 
“Hang on, girlfriend?” you smirk. “Slow down there, dude, we’ve only been on three dates.” 
Dean instantly blushes violently. “I should go, I’m not used to this kind of rom com crap, I’m trying to be cute, but it’s clearly not working,” he complains, clearly embarrassed.
You laugh softly as you reach out and grab his wrist to stop him from turning away and heading towards the door. 
“You should at least give me that kiss you’ve been thinking about,” you tell him with a gentle smirk, biting down on your bottom lip as a smile begins to flitter over his lips. 
“Are you sure? It’s pretty passionate,” he tries to tease back, clearly getting his confidence back just a little. 
“I think I can handle it, it’s you that you should be worrying about,” you counter, leaning your face closer to his with a quiet giggle.
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dairy-farmer · 20 days
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So fun fact: I sometimes loose my hearing after a good orgasam. Actually it’s kinda all the time. I don’t know if this is normal or if anyone else gets this. It’s just always happened to me. The best way I can describe the actual hearing loss is likehigh pitch ringing and everything sounds muffled and far away. Kinda like in movies when there has been an explosion and the main character can’t hear anything for a bit. Except for we it can be like 5-20 minutes usually it it has occasionally been longer. It slowly comes back by its self, or sometimes comes back suddenly like when your ears pop after a plane ride.
Anyway it’s never really gotten me into too much trouble but I like to imagine Tim who loves to finger himself in his private bathroom in his office stumbling into a WE meeting completely deaf.
He doesn’t even have to be sleeping with someone. In fact it’s kinda better if Tim is a chronic masterbater pervert that gets of 10 times per day. He gets really good at finishing quickly and quietly. He gets back from patrol 10 minutes before everyone else and rubs one out right there while straddling his bike, no time to get in the shower. He gets 20min of peace and quiet while on a stake out. He sits on a gargoyle the right way and the seem of his suit rubs just right. He once finished just as the bell rang while waiting for Damian outside school in the pick up area. He was in his car and it had tinted windows so what’s the harm. He has and does make everyone turn on the subtitles for him during movie nights or when watching a tv show with his brothers because he sometimes will get himself off under the blankets or just right there on the couch if they are sitting in front of him.
He’s not even into like risky stuff or exhibitionism, he genuinely doesn’t want to get caught he just loves orgasams. His dream life is to stay in bed all day masterbating but he is so busy and doesn’t even have time to sleep so he just gets of when he can….and often. It’s about compromise he will just up a few hours of sleep but he refuses to have less then 3 orgasms a day. Hearing lost be damned, he can read people lips and he’s smart enough to understand a situation even without one of his senses.
Does his family notice that sometimes Tim is completely deaf? Yes and no. His brother just think he’s an idiot and probably daydreaming. Bruce however does notice and keeps asking to check his hearing. Tim keeps telling him his hearing is fine and that no he can’t check it.
It comes to a head when after months of pestering him, and then giving him a full lecture that turns into a fight. Because Tim doesn’t hear him say something vitally important out in the field or during a fight or something.
Tim lets him do a hearing test and Bruce is very confused when Tim’s hearing is perfectly fine.
…Maybe Bruce digs deeper and spies on Tim because he can’t let it go. Maybe he finds out just why little Timmy is sometimes totally deaf 🥰☺️
i can't say i've ever heard of that before but it definitely sounds possible! ears are weird because mine 'crackle' when i yawn.
but tim going temporarily deaf after masturbating 👀👀👀 presents so much potential. him losing his hearing because he can't not touch himself because he just loves the feeling so much. the way his insides buzz and clench the way his whole body feels warm and lax. he finally unclenches his jaw and his headaches go away and in exchange he just can't hear for a few minutes- it always comes back to so it's not a big enough deal to bring up. plus it saves him some of the embarrassment because in his family literally nothing stays secret, any shift or change in his medical file will be public knowledge. tim's even pretty sure dick and bruce have their notifications turned on for any changes to his file.
of course it ends up backfiring eventually because tim had decided to take a small "break" and ended up missing a cue in a fight he was dragged into. of course bruce doesn't let it go, he brings up past instances as proof of tim's waning hearing and it's not TECHNICALLY fully true so of course tim argues back!
in the end tim is forced to take a hearing test and much to bruce's surprise he passes!!
and tim thinks that must be the end, bruce got his answers even if they weren't what he wanted.
...but tim does not consider just how INTENT bruce can be when he smells a mystery.
so bruce spies like he usually does, is surprised by just how much time time spends masturbating and the places he does it in (as well as his almost commendable efficiency?). and after hearing tim through a bug finish in his car and then exit to cross the street to enter a cofeeshop bruce...feels something when a driver loudly honks at tim but tim doesn't react at all.
he begins to suspect and then put it together until he gets his answer behind tim's mysterious deafness.
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femsolid · 2 years
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Every woman, of course, wishes to believe that the man in her life is an exceptional man, a man in a million, and that therefore she is the exceptional woman. But the odds are 99.9 to 0.1 against her (and .1 is probably a high estimate), because almost no man, no matter how gentle, no matter how liberal, could bear to reject the innumerable privileges (operant in very subtle as well as blatant ways in every sphere of his life) of being male, even if it were possible. A friend once wrote to me, "For me, the bottom line now with men is that any man (my brother, too, whom I love dearly) will sell me out if it's a choice between me and patriarchy, me and his male privilege."
- Sonia Johnson
Women feel that, without men, we will be alone and further isolated. We will have no one. We do not see relations with other women as an alternative. Without men, life isn’t worth living. This reveals the extent to which women experience our selves through men’s eyes. The more lost women feel without men, the more we have defined ourselves through our relationships with men and in relation to men.
Having most members of any oppressed group live one-on-one with their oppressors is probably the strongest possible arrangement for ensuring continued psychological enslavement. Whether the adult male is father or husband, the effect is the same: the woman is isolated from other women.
- Dee L. R. Graham
Men are thinking, writing, and creating, because women are pouring their energy into those men; women are not creating culture because they are occupied with love.
- Shulamith Firestone
Heterosexuality stands out as one of the last bastions of patriarchy where the notion of individual choice remains thoroughly unexamined. This leads to curious scenarios such as the phenomenon of feminists who might be critical of the notion of ‘choice’ and ‘agency’ in relation to oppressive systems such as pornography and prostitution, posting pictures of themselves in wedding dresses on social media, and defending their ‘choices’ as a purely private affair.
- Julia Long
Feminism is stifled by women with shifting priorities based on necessary compromises with the men in their lives. This will always create a burden for the woman to choose between her politics and the oppressor class she has an intimate connection to.
- Sustainable Separatist
Women’s magazines place young women’s ability to establish and maintain heterosexual dating relationships at the centre of women’s identities. Rhetoric surrounding the achievement of ‘wedded bliss’ and finding ‘Mr Right’ abounds, with men the ultimate source of ‘women’s fulfilment’.
- Kate Farhall
The whole world wants you to partner up with a man; the handful of us who want liberation don’t threaten your little domestic dream beyond asking you to self-reflect a bit and ponder your priorities. We’re not witches, and we’re not the monster under your bed either. We’re women alive leading fulfilling lives, and we’d love it if more women got to experience it. There’s no non-misogynistic man. Some do a good job of fooling the women around them, but none of them isn’t complicit in women’s oppression. Why do you feel such a need to put your life and your freedom in a man’s hand? Can’t you do things yourself instead of waiting for someone else’s input? At the end of the day it’s not about your feelings. It’s about doing something so things change instead of just waiting passively for men to deign to give us a few rights, it’s about women’s liberation. And that might very well be something you are not interested in, which is your prerogative, but it’s not my case.
- Floatingbook
The most exhilarating experience of my newly-divorced life was the discovery that I could be whole and happy without a man; that the fierce brainwashing to the contrary, which I’d sustained all my life, was not only composed of lies from start to finish, but was a total reversal of the truth: it’s not women who need men, but men who need women.
- Sonia Johnson
I don’t think we need to argue or defend female separatism. We just have to build it. Women who are able to speak against it obviously see no benefit in joining, so they can stay as they are. But they can’t control what we do. They can go on and on about how absolutely dreadful it would be, while we’re already building our houses and planting our gardens and having immense joy at the freedom and life. Separatism proves its points by existing and showing what it really is. Don’t waste energy telling people how stupid they are for fighting you about it, come learn all about berries and sustainable permaculture with us.
- Balkan Radfem
Friends and enemies will be clearly lined up, and the friends will be real friends and the enemies unable to hide behind phony benevolence — nor will we have to toady to them. An end to this constant remaking of ourselves according to what the male ego demands! Let us be ourselves and good riddance to those who are then repulsed by us!
- Dana Densmore
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