Usopp is jealous of what Zoro and Sanji have. There's nothing romantic about it, but there is passion between them. And yes, Sanji and Usopp fight but not that much and never that way and they used to do it more when they weren't dating. And it's not like fighting has anything to do with passion or love or whatever, Usopp loves the way Sanji loves and the sweetness he always offers. But- But it's- It's a dumb reason. It's stupid. But Nami mentions something about Sanji and Zoro getting a room and Robin adds something about passion also coming from hatred and arguing. So Usopp tries to make Sanji mad. Again, stupid. But he tries. He tries to do everything on the list that makes Sanji lose control because he wants him to yell and fight with him and have the same back and forth they used to have, not the same he has with Zoro, but, you know. Something more passionate. But he never manages to make him angry. It's Sanji the one who's always either apologizing or holding himself back or trying hard not to say anything hurtful. And fine, okay, that's cute. That's so sweet. He loves Usopp so much. Too much. But it's a bit frustrating. So one day Usopp yells "Why won't you get angry at me?!" / "What? Why would you ever want me to do that? Did you hit your head, mon amour?" / "No! I just- Fuck. It's stupid. Drop it. It's dumb" / "It's obviously not dumb if it's bothering you so much. Tell me" / "I don't want to" / "Usopp" / "Nope" / "For fuck's sake, Usopp! Just tell me already or I will get it out of you!" But he grabs Usopp by the shirt while saying this like he used to do when they were just friends bickering, and it does something to Usopp. His heart is doing backflips. His blood is not, uh, in his brain precisely if you know what I mean. Sanji notices this after a few seconds and goes "Wait- Shit. Does seeing me angry turn you on?" / "Nope. Not at all. But if you could do it again that would be great-" / "Jesus fucking christ, Usopp, I can't stand you" / "You know, I'm not sure if you're truly angry right now or if you're indulging me. It's a bit confusing with, uh, the whole topic-" / "I actually don't know either. Let me think".
So turns out they end up talking about it before doing anything because Sanji is a romantic and he's all respectful and even if Usopp is dying there for more of that, he'll have to wait until they have the talk. Yay. Boundaries. Consent. Whatever, Usopp is stressed. "I just don't want to hurt you-" / "Damn, calm down. I'm not telling you to beat me up, I'm telling you to, like, I dunno-" / "Why would you even want me to get angry at you? Is- Is what we do not enough or-" / "No! Yes! I mean- It's amazing, babe, really. I was just considering... Other options... And... One of the options might be, you know..." / "I actually don't know" / "You're just so sweet to me and I love that about you, but you have to know-" / "It turns you on when I get angry?" / "You're extremely hot when you're mad. I just think a bit of... Passion? Would be good for us. For me, mostly. For my dick-" / "I get it, dear, you don't need to explain it".
And one thing leads to another and when they know, they know. Usopp will tease Sanji while he's cooking. Will bother him every now and then when he's busy. Will do things he knows he isn't supposed to do that make Sanji go insane. If Luffy did those things he would end up in the bottom of the sea without hesitation. But since it's Usopp doing it, they just end up arguing (Sanji is literally incapable of not asking every fucking second if Usopp is comfortable, but whatever, good enough. He's sweet like that even when he's mad) and then they make out wherever they are. And it's messy and intimate because they're disgustingly in love.
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