#I want him to have a role in Ramshackle as a whole as well as a guide for Felix
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subukunojess · 25 days ago
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Creativity At It's Finest
Twisted Wonderland: Here's a complex Autistic child who some of you will swoon over but ultimately he's the tragic side character that no one will remember in the end. Me, writing Legends Over The Horizon: Forget that! Not only will said character be a part of Ramshackle as an honorary student, but he's going to be intricate to the main plot, especially with one of the protagonists! LONG LIVE THE HALLOWEEN KING! AHAHAHAHA!
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a-twistedheartslonging · 8 months ago
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IM LOVING UR NONHUMAN AU.
Do you think Crowley would be protective of us? Maybe fend off the beasties that try to court us?
That's a cute thought.
Realistically, Crowley is a dick that often leaves the protagonist to fend for their self and pushes them to take care of dangerous stuff that they really shouldn't have to.
But on the other hand…hehe birb dad.
One of the reasons he avoids us is because of the whole us “wanting a way home thing.”
Imagine his surprise when you tell him you would rather stay. Maybe you don't have a family, maybe the family you have is horrible, or maybe it's because our world is a polluted mess with a cruddy economy. Regardless it means he doesn't have to (pretend) to put in the work of sending you home. 
Well, as long as there's a place for you to stay that is. He is sort of your guardian and it would be in the best interest of himself and the entire school if you stayed.
Now a thing I like to think about…this man is likely lonely. I mean, a lot of people don't like the guy. (for good reason) The students and teachers are tired of his shit, though he and Trien seem to be homies and have tea together, the guy’s cat still hates him. Crowley also doesn't have a mate or any hatchlings waiting at home for him.
Combine the guilt trip of having nowhere else to go, add his loneliness, and then butter the guy up. I would say you have a good chance of getting him attached.
Imagine he sees you heading his way and is about to screw off cuz he doesn't want to deal with whatever thing you need to get fixed or have to complain about, you catch the sleeve of his coat before he can, and so he braces himself. But instead of asking him for something or scolding him you simply ask him about his day and how he's doing.
Birdman is shook.
Bit by bit the tasks and chores he gives you are ones where you'll be around him or he’ll randomly pop in to check in on you while doing them. Soon you end up being the preferred person for making and bringing him his tea. He pretends to nap on his office couch while you do his paperwork. May even ask you to help him file his claws on occasion. If it wasn't so dire for you to take care of things at the school he would be half tempted to bring you along on one of his vacations. If you give him anything it's going on his desk and he will brag about it to anyone who enters his office.
His cheap ass isn't going to spoil you but he will bring you small gifts. Usually the random shiny thing and small souvenir from his trips away. You might start finding loose feathers around Ramshackle and more crows around who also bring small things.
He starts thinking up plans for you to stay on as official faculty of the school once graduating. Of course, it's only because you are super useful and not because he’ll miss you or anything…
It doesn't really hit him until after he sees one of the teachers getting all father figure-y with you and he gets jealous.
Displeased bird noises.
Even before he started to get attached to you he did keep an eye on you, your easy prey amongst beasts after all, but he does develop a habit of popping in more when a boy happens to show his interest in you…or anytime he thinks someone is trying to sneak in and swipe his unofficial dad role…he does a lot of that with Crewel and Trien in particular.
Still, even with his affection for you, he’s still very much…him and the boys know this. Not long till he finds the more well-off beasty boys in his office offering donations to the school in exchange for certain things. More info about you, making you a member of his dorm, ect. A few have learned that the best thing to butter him up with is to talk about what a kind and generous father figure he is and how lovely it would be for Crowley to give the perfect away on their wedding day.
As a result, he, and probably Grim, are going to nudge you toward certain preferred suitors.
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thatnonameuser · 1 month ago
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I always have a spot for "Peepaw" Lilia, Alongside his war days self but I wonder what happens if the role of the Platonic!yandere turns.. Romantic? Reunion for feeling that living spark that he once had when he was young for his Childhood Friends.
What if he's not aiming for the young yuu that the younglings are hunting down, especially if he's also trying to be matchmaker for his sons... but A hidden older darling in Ramshackle that he stumbled upon while a potion/ Spell mishap? (Turning to a tiny bat, turning a ghost, teleportation, etc). 
Their child Yuu is out there, and Here they are recovering from– something? Where woes and common ground being a parent comes in play?
Before I begin, all the Lilia lovers out there. The reason I don't want to write Lilia as a romantic yandere for the MC in the yandereverse, is because Lilia is the equivalent of 70 in the TWST World and MC is at youngest 18. That's just makes me too uncomfortable for me to write.
But for an older darling, I can do that....
For this I'll be using Yuu for the MC, ____ is you. Also, the reader is the parent/older sibling of Yuu.
Lilia is no stranger to the craziness that comes out of one's love for their one true love.
It was much wilder in the olden days. Back when duels to the death were much more common. It's for the best the times have changed. The very last thing he wants to experience is having to pick between his boys should their fight for human Yuu grow out of hand.
Things have changed for the better these days.
But he wishes he'd made the decision to fight for Maleanor back when she was alive. The hole in his heart from that loneliness and grief has carved a hole in him that not even his fatherly love for Malleus and Silver can fill.
He's expected to die with that hole craving him clean through.
But it seems Maleanor didn't head back to stars just yet.
He was never one to follow the darling reincarnation belief after her death. All his years of travel during his search for information killed that belief dead, before it ever came to life. That was until he found you.....
He wasn't expecting to find you when he did. He wasn't expecting to find you at all.
In fact, he'd been following Malleus on one of his little walks dates. Yuu's rejection of his love was harsh, but Malleus was always so kind at heart. Poor boy always yearned for love. And he would get that love, all Yuu needs is a push, or rather a very harsh and painful shove.
That was his plan for the night. Go and nudge force Yuu in the right direction.
Malleus teleported back to Diasomnia, he'd calm his temper when he returned later.
And that's when it happened.
He'd known that besides Grim, Yuu wasn't the only one that lived in Ramshackle, but he was yet to see the other person. And now he did.
The foolish Yuu retreats back to the safety of their dorm. And an another one comes out.
And for the first time in four hundred years, his heart feels full again. He feels whole, at just the sight of them. That same pull that he'd felt back in his youth. That warmth and joy that's born from undying everlasting love. He feels two hundred years younger, like a weight was taken off his shoulders.
It seems his dove came back to him. And you've come back as something equally beautiful as you were before.
The little darling in your arms is frightened, "______...Why?! Why did he?" Oh, so that's your new name. ______, it's just as lovely as the last one.
"Sh, It's okay. You're going to be okay, Yuu." You hug them in your arms like you want to protect them from this big dangerous world. Far away from all the evils that threaten them. Aw~ Isn't that just the sweetest? Your parental love is just as strong as it's been all those years ago. So desperate to protect your children from the threats that try to steal them from your arms.
Well, it would just be cruel to do what he planned to Yuu now. It would just tear you to shreds to be separated from them.
Perhaps, he can use this to his advantage. You don't want to be separated, so he'll give you the option of staying together.
Wouldn't that just make you all a big happy family? Him, finally reunited with his precious dove again and one of his boys happy with their darling Yuu. It will mean he'll have to play peacemaker pretty soon but, after he convinces them to share, all will be well.
"Go back inside, Yuu. Arm yourself, stay with Grim and don't open the door until I come back. OK?" You're so protective, willing to send your loved one away and staying behind in the danger zone. The two of you are so much alike.
He doesn't mean to jump the gun, but it seems Malleus might even be reunited with his mother, all he has to do is make contact. Well, the younger darling is inside now, no time like the present.
"Hello there, little dove!" You jump out your skin in surprise at his sudden arrival, but he's expected that. He also expected the kitchen knife you try to drive into his face. He catches it with ease, he's grown up with your fiery little temper. You haven't changed a bit.
"You're wearing Diasomnia colours, are you Lilia Vanrouge?" You recognise him, why didn't he start believing in that idea earlier.
"Why yes I am."
"Are here for Yuu?"
"No, no, my precious dove. I'm here for you." Your face widens in surprise.
Now, that he's much closer he can see the difference between Yuu and yourself. You're a little older, by a few years at minimum. Still, you're quite young. He won't have to worry about your fragile human life ending so soon. Plus, this means he can leave Silver with some siblings.
"But-But I don't-I'm not-"
He shushes you, there's no need for this fear, this trepidation. "Dove. I've mourned you for so long. Now that you're back, I won't ever let you leave me again."
"But what about-"
"Don't worry, the little darling you're protecting will be fine. In fact, I think we'll be one big happy family."
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faebaex · 10 months ago
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Tangled in Wonderland - Pick Your Poison
author note: next part finally! i enjoyed writing Vil, I've never written for him before and really wanted to do a good job. i thought alot about his values and how to put across his character, so i hope it doesn't seem too ooc, as i have never written him before now! next up is Ignihyde, and i'm planning to get that out before the end of the month! I've had an idea for that chapter for months, and i'm really excited to write it and add a little twist ≧✯◡✯≦ hope you enjoy!!
characters: Vil Schoenheit x GN!Reader
Something was definitely up.
Really, you should be relieved. This is what you had wanted all along, the whole reason that you had kept a low profile in the first place. But for some reason, now you just felt disconcerted. Uneasy, like there was an axe hanging above your head, ready to drop any moment.
Azul had still overblot. It wasn’t unexpected, especially considering you were the one who gave the Heartslabyul braincell duo the hot tip on where exactly they should look to get some leverage on Azul. You had no idea of what Leona’s involvement was in the whole situation, if he was at all, and you weren’t present to witness Azul’s overblot. But that wasn’t the part that had you all shaken up.
No.
The part that disturbed you was that Jamil’s overblot still happened, and you had absolutely no involvement in the events. You made sure you stayed well away from Scarabia, from Kalim, from Jamil. Even when you inevitably ran into him in the cafeteria kitchen when you were feeding the fire fairies, you made sure not to stare into his eyes, staring at his lips or anywhere else instead. You excused yourself as soon as possible, even though you were sure you’d aroused Jamil’s suspicions at least a little bit with your flighty behaviour.
You had wondered what the consequences of this would be. Would Jamil’s initial plan be a success and Kalim would end up ousted from his role as housewarden? Would Jamil take his place and finally be satisfied? Would his overblot be avoided altogether?
Clearly not.
You first noticed that something was up when Grim didn’t return back to Ramshackle one afternoon after the two of you had split up the work of feeding the fire fairies. You had hoped that he was just taking his sweet time, but he didn’t return that evening, or the evening after that. You debated with the idea of going and helping him out, but eventually decided not to. You felt a little bad, sure, but you trusted Grim’s tenacity to get him out of trouble.
When Grim finally returned home, he was practically bursting at the seams to tell you everything that had happened during his absence. Such willingness earned him a can of premium tuna, which you kept on hand for bribery. As you had expected, he had spent the last couple of days playing through the story route for book four. After becoming embroiled in the study hell that brainwashed Kalim was forcing on the Scarabia students, Grim escaped only to fall straight into the arms of Octavinelle. From what Grim had told you, book four played out exactly the same as the game, even without your presence, with Octavinelle’s meddling resulting in Jamil’s plan being foiled and him subsequently overblotting. Grim was particularly proud to tell you that even when Azul and the Leech twins had asked about you, he had not said a single peep about you. You gave him another can of premium tuna for that, hoping that one it was true, and two that he would be more inclined to continue being as discrete in the future.
You wondered if book four had continued as planned without your presence because the main character was more passive during that book then they were in all previous books. It was getting harder to wrack your brain and remember all the finer details of each book, especially considering that actually being in Twisted Wonderland when these events were unfolding was giving you seriously nauseating amounts of déjà vu.
All of these feelings led you to your next plan of action. With the culture fair fast approaching, that meant that book five was also on the horizon. And that meant you would have to deal with Vil Schoenheit. You’d been lucky enough to avoid any interactions with him at all since arriving in Twisted Wonderland, and you wanted to keep that streak going, preferably. You needed to not participate in the SDC at all, and you definitely couldn’t have the NRC Tribe staying at Ramshackle.
So yet again, you kept your head down. You didn’t go to the audition with Ace and Deuce, although you did feel bad enough about ditching them to watch their practices once or twice. When Rook’s message on an arrow summoned you to the Pomefiore ballroom after school with Ace and Deuce, you refused to attend. The Heartslabyul duo were confused at your outright refusal, but you managed to convince them that you had no interest in the SDC and simply wanted to focus all your energy on finding a way home. They both seemed to accept that, even if they found your behaviour a little odd.
That resulted in the Headmage paying you a rare visit in the library a few days later. He had implored you to find ‘enough kindness in your heart’ to share Ramshackle dorm with the SDC members. You had refused, of course, even after he tried to sweeten the deal by promising to pay for renovations to Ramshackle, which you knew were never going to happen. Crowley even had the audacity to promise to increase his exploration in a way home for you, which very almost had you throwing one of the books you had in front of you at him. You didn’t particularly want to upset the library ghosts. You managed to chase off Crowley by using the opening he had given you when he had brought up your home situation, with you pressing the Headmage on what exactly he had been doing this whole time. You were hoping that was the end of it, and if you just kept your head down and refused to cooperate, you could stay safely in the background.
But of course that wasn’t the end of it, because for some reason everyone at Night Raven College wanted to test your patience, even if you hadn’t officially met them yet.
You had left the library late that night, having gotten carried away reading one of the books you had sourced. Whilst the books that you read in an attempt to figure out a way home were often dense and confusing, you often came across interesting sections. You’d never dreamed that you’d be reading textbooks about magic, real magic, so it was so easy to get lost when interesting tidbits about forgotten magical practices or magical artifacts came up. You were startled when one of the library ghosts gave you a not so gentle fright to let you know it was late and you should probably go home, and you didn’t need any more persuading.
You were sure that Grim had probably fended for himself for dinner and you wondered if he would be that upset if you snagged one of his tins of tuna for himself as you crossed over the threshold into Ramshackle. You yawned, not bothering to cover your mouth, and attempting to stretch your stiff shoulders and back as you slowly ambled through the walkway towards the kitchen.
“If you paid more attention to your posture, you wouldn’t be feeling stiff at all.”
You froze in the walkway when you heard that familiar voice that shouldn’t feel familiar.
You doubled back several steps until you were looking in through the doorway towards the lounge, where none other than Vil Schoenheit sat on your couch, demurely sipping from one of your mugs. Your expression must have said it all, because he brought the mug away from his lips and raised an elegant eyebrow at you.
“Must you gawk? It does nothing for your features.”
You hadn’t even realised your mouth was hanging open, and you promptly snapped it shut. “What are you doing here?” You stuttered out before you managed to regain some of your composure, “I told the Headmage I wasn’t interested in hosting the NRC Tribe, so if he told you that—”
“I know what you said. I’m here because I think you should reconsider.” Vil remarked, a certain haughtiness in his tone that told you he thought you were being unnecessarily difficult. He gestured toward a free seat on the sofa, as if it was his lounge, not yours.
You blinked, slightly taken back by the audacity before you leaned heavily on the doorframe, pinching the bridge of your nose as that familiar feeling of frustration that you got when you had to deal with any of characters pestering you began to build in your bones. “Look—” You began.
“No, sit. We will be having a proper discussion about this.” Vil cut you off with an air of authority, one wielded by someone who often got their way, one way or another. Your eyes narrowed, your hand dropping from your face so Vil could feel the full impact of your disdain. “This is my dorm, Schoenheit, you should be treating me with more respect. You can’t order me around here.”
Vil gave you a smile that was as demeaning as it was beautiful. “Of course. But we are both housewardens, and housewardens should treat each other with mutual respect, no? The least you could do is give me the courtesy of a discussion.”
If you never had to deal with another housewarden again, it would be too soon.
You huffed but relented, moving over towards one of the sofas and all but threw yourself down, with elicited another eyebrow raise from Vil. Your phone tumbled out of your pocket on impact, lighting up in all its cracked glory and drawing Vil’s eye. “You should really get that fixed.” Vil commented dryly, and you scoffed whilst flipping it over, hiding it from his critical gaze.
“There is nothing you can say that will convince me to host the NRC Tribe here, so you’re just wasting your breath.” You said bluntly, hoping to end this pointless conversation quickly, but Vil didn’t look phased.
“I thought you might say that, so lets just cut to the negotiations. If you allow the NRC Tribe to stay here until the SDC concludes, Rook and I shall donate our share of the prize to Ramshackle dorm. Should we win, of course.” Vil looked at you expectantly, and you rolled your eyes.
“Crowley already tried to bribe me, and I’m not buying it.” You responded cooly, “I don’t intend to stay at Ramshackle, or even Twisted Wonderland, long enough to enjoy any benefit from allowing the NRC Tribe to stay here.” A bluff, considering you had no new leads on how to get home, but Vil didn’t seem to catch on, “also, all that hinges on the NRC Tribe actually winning the SDC. Not saying I don’t have any faith…” Which of course you don’t, you know the outcome. “… But as I’ve already made clear, I really don’t want to host, especially not out the goodness of my heart.”
To his credit, Vil seemed to be mulling over your words, placing his mug of tea down so he could fold his arms gracefully in front of him. “Ah yes, I see… The Headmage did mention you had been researching quite steadfastly. You know, tenacity is the pillar of Pomefiore…” You swear you could see a hint of respect in his eyes as he looked on at you approvingly, before he continued on with his train of thought, “then how about something more short term to sweeten the deal? Such as…” His eyes darted down to your poor phone. “Perhaps I could arrange for your phone to be fixed?”
You scoffed. “Who are you, Azul?” Vil frowned at that comparison, looking a little affronted. Good.
“How about this, then. The NRC Tribe stays here for the time that we need, and that’ll be it. You won’t be expected to carry out any support duties, nor give us any of your time. Furthermore, I’ll provide groceries for the full duration that we are at Ramshackle, and I won’t tell Crowley about it. Perhaps then you can put your living allowance for that month towards something to help with your research? All you need to do is allow us use of your free rooms and living space for a limited period. And of course, if NRC tribe are victorious at the SDC, I still intend to donate my share of the prize to Ramshackle.”
It was a tempting offer.
What you wanted was to not be involved with the SDC at all, and this allowed you to do that. You wouldn’t be the manager, or support in any form. You wouldn’t even have to see the NRC Tribe if you didn’t want to, you’re pretty sure you could negotiate further with Vil that the members weren’t to disturb you at all during their stay. You had already seen how Vil had ruled with an iron fist during the story, if it got him what he wanted, he would see it done.
But… With the NRC Tribe staying at Ramshackle, there was a risk that Ace and Deuce would gravitate towards you, and then Grim would get dragged in, which would likely end with you getting caught up and… You shook your head, looking towards Vil resolutely. “No, that’s not going to work for me. Sorry, but the NRC Tribe are going to have to find somewhere else for their training camp.”
Vil stared at you for a long moment, his eyes narrowing slightly as if he was studying you before he sighed, twisting his wrist around elegantly to check the time. “I’ll allow you to sleep on it. We can continue this topic again in the morning. Its time for me to retire for the evening, I don’t want to waste the effects of that herbal tea.”
You crooked an eyebrow as Vil stood, following suit shortly after. He drank a sleep tea in your dorm, even though he had to walk back to his own dorm? Odd, but each to their own. Maybe it was a Pomefiore thing? You did vaguely remember from the game that Vil set strict standards for himself…
You followed him out of the lounge, planning on giving him the courtesy of walking him to the door. Whilst he had invaded your home, he had been civil, which was more than you could say about half the other people on campus who pestered you on campus.
Of course, you had no idea just how deeply Vil had taken root in your home during your absence.
As you left the lounge, Vil turned towards the staircase instead of continuing down the walkway to where the main doors lie. “Uh, Vil. Wrong way. The entrance is this way.” You directed politely, only for Vil to continue walking. As he reached the first stair, he looked over his shoulder at you, with a look you could only describe as coy.
“Didn’t I mention, my dear? I’ve already moved in.”
For the second time that evening, your jaw dropped. Was he serious?!
“Vil—” You began, but he was already continuing up the stairs, clearly unbothered by your surprise and discontent. “I’ll see you in the morning, bright and early to continue our discussion. Sleep well, Prefect.”
You could only watch as Vil climbed the stairs and disappeared deeper into Ramshackle, hearing the creaky sound of the door of the room he had chosen opening and closing as he retired for the night. You were rendered absolutely speechless. You had never anticipated something like this happening. Even without agreeing to having the NRC Tribe stay at Ramshackle for their training camp, you still had Vil Schoenheit staying here anyway?! You scrubbed your hands over your tired face in frustration.
Just what else were you in for?
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sweetbunpura · 2 months ago
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No. 2: TRUST ISSUES (Word count: 703)
Amusement Park | Role Reversal | “You got away with the crime while the knife's in my back.” (Charlotte Sands, Rollercoaster)
Earning trust wasn’t hard for Jamil, it was fairly easy in fact. Trust from strangers, trust from the Al Asim family, trust from Kalim and the dorm. Of course, once he revealed his plan and overblotted, the trust had diminished between him and the rest of the dorm. Kalim was quick to forgive, like he always does, and asked the dorm to forgive him as well. He eventually regained the trust a month after the break, but there was one person whose trust had not been restored and was very vocal about it.
Yuu avoided Jamil like the plague, which normally he wouldn’t care about, but that was before she handed him the beatdown of a lifetime. Anytime he tried to offer her an apology, she would just glare at him and leave before he could get a word in. He was more than willing to drop the whole idea of trying to clear the air between them, but if she wanted to avoid him then he could do the same to her. Except that it wasn’t as easy as Jamil thought it sounded, now becoming hyper aware of how involved Yuu was in the people who hang out near him.
All the sharp looks and harsh insults were starting to get to Jamil, and now that he and Kalim were about to bunk in Ramshackle, he finally decided to put his foot down.
“Yuu.” He calls out to her as he sees her on her way out of her class.
She pauses and seems to debate turning around to face him, but ultimately does with the coldest look on her face.
“What do you want, Viper?”
Jamil fought down the shiver that was threatening to run down his back. “I need to talk to you.”
“About?”
“You’ve been avoiding me since... winter break.” He crosses his arms. “I’m trying to apologize and you’re been elusive. I’m trying to put this behind us-”
“No, Viper, you’re trying to put this behind you.” She growls and jabs a finger at him. “You don’t want to acknowledge all the shit you did to others, including me.” 
“They-”
“Are quick to go back to trusting your ass.” Yuu approached and Jamil found himself stepping back out of her range. “But me? Oh I trusted you before, you seemed interesting and you got a trustworthy face. Instead, you fucking kidnap me and use me as a pawn in your plot.”  She kept walking until Jamil found himself pinned back against the wall. “So forgive me if I’m not chomping at the bits to forgive your manipulating ass.”
Jamil blinked before narrowing his eyes. “I’m sorry, isn’t it your job to help clean up the mess around the school? After all, isn’t that what Crowley is paying you for? Sorry, I mean, allowing you to live here for?”
The moment that left his mouth, he knew he messed up. The visual change in her was immediate as she took a deep breath, let it out, and slammed her fist into the wall next to his head. Jamil jumped as he didn’t see the fist coming and moved his eyes to watch the tile from the wall shatter and fall on the ground.
“I should throw your weaseling, high and mighty ass out into the snow and let you rough it out from there, Viper.” Her voice is cold as she seems to tower over Jamil at this moment. “Feel every bit of shit you put me through tenfold. But unlike you, I have a heart at the moment, you fucking cold-blooded asshole.”
She backed up and pulled her fist away from the wall. Jamil stared at her with wide eyes as she suddenly grabbed him by his jacket.
“Listen to me when I tell you this. I will never trust you again, I will never accept your apology, and I’m allowing you to stay at Ramshackle because of my friendship with Kalim.” Yuu threw him on the ground. “Now crawl back to your master while you still have the use of both of your legs and never come near me again, Viper.”
With that, Yuu stormed away into the hallway, leaving Jamil to contemplate what he just awoke.
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blueberrypancakesworld · 9 months ago
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I've got a request ❤️
She gives Pelle roadhead 🥰
Road and Food
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warning : oral male reciving, implied drinking, tiny fluff (kinda)
masterlist
Disclaimer : I don't want to glorify anything, it's about the actors who play a role, not the real events.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In front of the ramshackle house where the band was located were two cars, one belonging to Euronymous, who had half-bought it himself, and one belonging to Dead.
Two cars, one of which was about to move when the two people on the mattress woke up. The sun shining through the window had moved them and the smell of coffee and beer lured them into the kitchen.
A smell they were both used to and which always signaled to them that breakfast was ready, that it was time to get up again and that they both had to get off the mattress.
Even though she could feel his hand on hers, she knew that he stayed with her in the mornings. He valued her life…something he didn't have according to himself. ,,You?" his girlfriend had looked at him with a raised eyebrow as she pulled the top over her torso. Her skin disappeared underneath and the blonde's bright eyes turned away from her body.
The workage young man just shook his head and took his own clothes from the dresser that was not yet full of paint, blood or wood from any broken instruments. But neither of them had finished making the coffee downstairs that filled the whole house. ,,Well, let's get to breakfast," she mumbled and gave her boyfriend a smile, which he returned with a nod.
The two of them went downstairs, which had seen better days, but when they finally arrived in the kitchen they saw only coffee and beer instead of a reasonably laid table. ,,No breakfast?" she spoke her thoughts and saw the band founder and the other girl sitting around the table. ,,No, no more breakfast," muttered Faust and Occultus added ,,nothing at all".
The two looked at each other and didn't even have to look at Hellhammer's grinning face to know that they both had to leave to get breakfast.
,,Shit," was all she heard Dead say as he ran his fingers through his hair and trotted off towards the cars while his friend took the group's list, ,,Didn't expect it to take ten minutes…keep you waiting," she grumbled and went after her friend when she saw him in the car, the engine running and even though one of the lights in the front wasn't working, the engine was running and that was the main thing.
With the list in the sweatshirt jacket she had taken, Dead drove off as she closed the door and the two of them drove along the stony grass path onto the road.
The cassette was playing the new song they had all recorded, Dead tapping lightly to the beat, his girlfriend humming lightly, but they both knew it would be at least another fifteen minutes before they arrived in town.
But that was the price for such a dump they all shared. But they could still complain… especially when it came to food. ,,Did you sleep well?" the blonde asked, looking over at her for a moment, a brief smile curving his lips as he saw the marks on her neck where his fingers had been, his lips kissing her.
The night had been more than just good for the two of them. Her fingers briefly rested on his cold hand, ,,Of course through you," she winked and saw the blush on his cheeks. Even though he usually liked it a little differently in bed, it was consensual…the sweetest thing was when it was like he was never up for it.
Why not have some fun? she thought and let her fingers wander a little over his arm, playing with the ends of his hair, tugging at it and leaning over to give him a kiss. ,,Tell me…do you want something?" he mumbled and stopped at a traffic light as he looked at her, he could understand her two-fingered grin, her fingers stroking down his thighs and they both saw very well that he was getting hard.
,,Well, it looks like YOU need something," she murmured and with one last look and an unseeing dead, he nodded. An assent before she bent down to his middle as best she could on the seat. ,,Ten minutes," he murmured and the car started moving again, but she just smiled that would be more than enough.
Her fingers moved slowly but with some pressure up her thighs, scratching the fabric before running over the bump that pressed against the fabric. ,,Someone's needy," she joked and saw that he gripped the steering wheel tighter, wanting to avoid her gaze but unable to because of the driving.
He liked it when she teased him she had the upper hand in these fast situations but it was a change sometimes it was her and in his room it was him. Before she let her fingers slowly undo the button and deftly pulled the fabric down to take care of his "problem" after she asked. She began to give him a few thrusts, her fingers closing around his cock, sometimes tighter, sometimes lighter.
Dead let himself fall back into the seat a little while he continued to concentrate on the road, or at least tried to. At least they weren't racing at a hundred so they would both die before their deaths by driving slowly in pleasure was at least something.
Whenever she pulled back, hinting at letting her tongue brush against him and it was just a kiss, he moved his hips slightly, trying to get friction. ,,Well, don't be so impatient," she reprimanded and let go of him completely to engage her boyfriend in a kiss, a kiss into which he suddenly moaned as she stroked his sensitive tip.
Knowing he was tensing up, he tried not to let on that he wanted her, that he wanted to stop and fuck her. ,,Can't, you're too irresistible," he mumbled and turned into one of the streets heading towards the store.
She still had enough time, at least she knew she did. Such a cutie, she thought her thoughts aloud before she ran her tongue over his arousal and kissed him, feeling the twitch before she took him in her mouth.
His moans and gasps began to fill the car after a moment, the music that was so acute mingled with the obscene noises coming from him.
The slight moan that came from her from time to time as she squeezed her thighs lightly together-they both wanted to have fun. She wrapped one of her hands around his lower body and stroked his cock in rhythm.
His fingers only tightened around the steering wheel while his other hand went to her hair. ,,Fu-fuck good…so good" he mumbled as his grip on her head slowly tightened due to the slightly different position she was in she did her best not to rip his pants all over with his drops of lust and spit but even if he had agreed. Her smirk caused a vibration and his moans continued through the car.
With her tongue teasing his tip at different speeds and her fingers always giving enough excitement, he pulled himself together not to move his hips completely towards her. Her caress over his leg was something of a thank you, but he tried to concentrate more on driving off when the light turned green because the store was only a few minutes down the road and to the left.
Her grin was briefly visible as he moved a little closer and she didn't try to relax a little more and take his full length. She heard his murmur, felt the twitch of the indistinct back of his hips before he poured himself into her mouth with a moan of her name as he just barely made the turn that led to the grocery store.
The slight jerking of his legs, just enough to push the pedals before the car came to a stop with a slight squeal. She swallowed as best she could and licked her lips as she slowly rose from him, his pants not too ruined-just a little. ,,Well, it looks like our problem has…eased," she winked and wiped her lips as she watched him take a moment to get dressed again.
,,I love you so much," he pulled her into a kiss and gasped as he tasted himself lightly, almost seeming to have forgotten that they still had to go shopping because there was a completely hungry band waiting for them all at home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
@icarus-star , @batzy-watzy
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yuufujimaru · 1 year ago
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Hiya mate! Thanks for writing this series! I must have read it a whole number of times already that I'm inspired to write my own take on it, with Yuu being an artist/arts kiddo and him having a particularly strong bond with both Heartslaybul and Pomefiore. And a few details from Hogwarts legacy. Heheh.
Anyways, any thoughts on how Yuu and his new batch of Ramshackle students would feel about being dragged into V/SDC 2 in whatever shape or form? Especially since I won't deny feeling slightly disappointed there wasn't a bigger ref to the SDC ramshackle found themselves in in your first fic.
Looking forward to seeing that new chapter being uploaded in the meantime! Cheers!
OMG! So late! Sorry!
Anyways!
OMG, YOUR SO SWEET! THANK YOU FOR YOUR WONDERFUL WORDS!!!
As for that version of Yuu...
He would be cynical of art for sure, seeing that whole art culture as bullshit and how you should make what you want for your own pleasure and desire. He also doesn't care about gendered roles, he likes to wear makeup and be pretty so he would be down to play a women's role if need be if the other's don't want to because Hermione is Hermione and Luna...well she could, but she needs to be trained in how to act, sing and dance and honey, they don't have that kind of time in order to be in time for VDC.
For what they would do, Yuu would totally take advantage of the fact he has a multicultural background from another world and use it to his advantage. He would either sing a version of Genshin's La Vaguelette, Divine Damsel of Devasation or Signora's Battle Theme. Ramshackle would for sure be the main dorm to represent NRC because Yuu has a plethora of ideas that no one else has and he is the only one that can do them in the limited amount of time they have because ngl, he forgot about VDC!
He would most def use everyone he is able to use to be able to make something so amazing that they have no chance of being beat. And if they are beaten...
He's not afraid to throw hands with people.
At all.
As for me not referencing it in the last story...the new one is a different story *heh* all together.
Anyways, hopes this help! If you have more questions feel free to message me here on tumblr!!
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notmagicalstudents · 1 year ago
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TwstOber 2023 Day 18 - Legacy
Here is the original TwstOber 2023 prompt by @raven-at-the-writing-desk: TwstOber2023
Note: I only realized this after I was done and looked through the previous TwstOber that this is just an expanded version of Day 22.
---
It was his duty.
Malleus knew this his whole life. He was the Prince of the Valley of Thorns and one of the most powerful magicians of all of Twisted Wonderland. He had a legacy and duty to fulfill in these roles. However, it was very lonely at times. He had Lilia and Silver, and Sebek as well, but it wasn't enough. That's why he enjoyed being at Night Raven; he was around other people to interact with. Some were afraid of him, others respected him, and a few would challenge him. But they all knew who he was and he had grown used to it. There were no real surprises anymore.
Then there was Stellarmonia. This person, who came into this world and has no magic powers of her own, has always seen him differently. She wasn’t scared of him when they first met; in fact, she actually had no idea who he was, so there was no fear of his presence or trying to grovel to his good side. Instead, she wanted to get to know him. He even gave her permission to give him a nickname and she did! Even when she learned his true name, they both preferred using his new nickname. She would invite him to places, which was something he never experienced. The first time she’d invite him to her dorm, he thought she was joking. But when he showed up at the dorm, she was happy to see him and he realized that she was being honest.
He honestly thought her kindness was due to some naivety. It was such a normal response from others, so why not her? The more they got to know each other, however, he was more convinced that wasn’t the case. “Stella, why are you not afraid of me?” he asked her one day, sitting on Ramshackles' front porch. She looked up at him in confusion.
“Why would I be, Mr. Horns?”
“Most are. Before you even knew my name, you didn’t look at me with fear or caution. No, you looked at me with curiosity and it continued once you did learn my identity. That’s what made you so intriguing to me. Now that we have gotten to know each other, I want to know why.” She hummed to herself, tilting her head in thought. Malleus waited patiently as she thought of her answer.
“When you appeared at our front gate, I didn’t feel like I had to be afraid.” she answers. “I had never met anyone like you before, so I was more enchanted by your appearance than anything. Then when you came around the second time, you were mysterious but it felt jovial like a game. That made me believe that you weren’t a dangerous person.”
“But you know me now more than our first meeting. You still don’t fear me?”
“Of course not. We are friends, right?” She smiles up at him, her violet eyes gleaming up at him.
“Friends, hm?” He smiles back at her. She says it so simply; a human becoming friends with a prince of the fae.
He has a legacy to fulfill, but would it be so selfish to have her in it?
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natewriteslol · 3 years ago
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Hello! I wanted to request headcannons, scenarios, or drabbles, whichever you want, with Kalim, Azul, Floyd, Ruggie, and Riddle (separately) where they overhear their S/O talking and think they want to break up with them when in reality they didn't. Preferably a fluffy ending. It's totally fine if you don't want to though, have a good day/night :)
A/N: Thank you sm bb and I hope you have a good day/night as well 💞
Y/N is gender neutral :)
Warnings: language, slight angst but it gets resolved :D
Kalim:
-Kalim had invested so much trust into you
-And while he denies it and forgives Jamil, the whole betrayal of trust situation had really messed with him
-But you were there for him! So for him to overhear what you were saying broke his heart
- “He’s just so fucking annoying! Like just get off my back already, and he tries so hard to be on my good side.”
-Kalim did know that you didn’t really care for materialistic things, but he did it to show that he cares about you!
-He knew that he could come off as clingy or annoying but you always reassured him
- “Kalim, you’re not at all annoying. In fact, it feels good that you’re always there for me.” 
-He started to cry and run away from the Ramshackle dorm he couldn’t believe that the person that he loved grew tired of him 
-While wallowing in his dorm living room, Kalim couldn’t help hear someone else in such a distraught state
- ““I cannot believe they said that about me! He’s just so fucking annoying! Like just get off my back already, and he tries so hard to be on my good side. I hate that Icarus guy!” And I try harder then them in club activities, I just want them to promote me!”
-Kalim decides to catch you back in the park area of Night Raven with all of your friends
-Your eyes sparked when you saw him, “Kalim thank goodness you’re here, I was looking all over for you!”
-You caught each other up only for Kalim to bring up the boy Icarus who was wailing in the dorm room, setting you off in a rage filled tangent about how much you hate the guy 
- “Seeing you Kalim makes me feel a thousand times better, Kalim. You don’t understand today’s just been so rough”
-But he understood perfectly Y/N. He always did.
Azul:
- “It’s pointless, you can’t expect me to love someone this worthless! I’m tired of pretending with him!” 
-I guess luck does run dry eventually
-Everything had been solved, and he had started dating you
-You built him up, made him feel like he was worth something
-You smoothed out the roughness of his soul and made him want to be a better person
-But here you are, describing him perfectly
-Worthless, narcissistic yet insecure was just his nature and he knew it
-He should’ve known better not to fall for your tricks, but when such beauty and comfort embraces you, you can’t help but want more
-He should’ve known better to just stay alone.  -Azul had been wallowing in his octo-pot for hours sobbing, only for the twins to burst in 
- “Boss we must speak to you about our finances on the restaura- Azul?”
- “I cannot believe it! They were right all long, no one could love anyone like me!” He wailed.
- “Oooh do you plan on taking Lockhart’s role of the evil ex for the play Y/N is in? Are you jealous of someone being in a romantic position with Y/N?~”
- ““What are you talking about? Didn’t you hear them in the common room, talking about me? It was horrible!”
- ““Boss…Y/N was rehearsing their lines for a play in their theater elective. I believe they’re playing the main character with an obsessive ex-boyfriend,” Jade explained.  -Azul definitely needs to work on being more involved with his partners extracurricular activities…
Floyd:
- “I mean he’s so crude and loud. Going around all touchy with people, he’s a major sleeze and I should’ve left him a long fucking time ago.”
-What. Did you just say?
-And there Jade is, sitting with a smile on his face as you’re ranting?
-He hides away Floyd’s feelings are a mixture of depression and anger
-Once his brother discovers him, Floyd gripped him by his collar
-“Why? Why did you just sit there and smile while they talked about me like that?! W-What type of brother are you?” Floyd barked
-Jade stood their with his eyes widened before giggling
- ““Floyd, they were talking about one of the characters in their t.v show. Remember Braden from Warped Dreamland? He cheated on Veronica as the season finale with Meridith.”
-“HE WHAT?! THAT SLEEZE! AND WHY WOULD YOU SPOIL THE EPISODE I DIDN’T WATCH IT WITH Y/N YET?”
-“Did you- I NEEDED TO GIVE YOU CONTEXT YOU FOOL-”
-All is well between you and Floyd and you ended up rage watching the finale again with him
-Floyd is still pissed at Jade for that spoiler tho-
Ruggie:
- “He’s so conniving and sneaky it’s ridiculous. You can’t trust him for shit.” 
-His habits from childhood most definitely followed him
-I mean, you weren’t wrong, almost killing an entire stadium of people just to win a tournament, hurting other competition and no doubt steals from others
-But, you believed in him
- “Don’t let your past define you, be proud of who you are in the present.” 
-You said you loved him, you made promises. 
-He felt hot tears run down his face, and the beastman ran away
-Ruggie felt so much shock from what you said, he was shivering 
-Why couldn’t he just be like the other boys?
-Jack hadn’t seen Ruggie at all today, and finding him sulking in his room was a sight the wolf beast man hadn’t seen in a long time
- “Ruggie is everything alright I haven’t seen you all day and Leona is looking for y-”
- “Do you believe them? That I’m conniving and sneaky, someone not to be trusted, Jack?”
- “Ruggie what are you talking about? Of course you’re not.”
- “Then why did you just stand by and let them say that about me, in the common room,” Ruggie said soullessly 
-And then it hit Jack, the human was talking  about Grim
- “…Ruggie, Y/N was talking about Grim. That cat bastard pawned off their toothbrush and some clothes for snacks from the gremlins in the woods. They texted you about it hours ago.”
-Ruggie checked his charging phone only to find that he left you on delivered for 7 HOURS, giving him a detailed story time 
-And that’s why you don’t leave your phone alone kiddos.
Riddle:
- “He’s such a bossy, little brat! I mean who does he think he is? And I have to pretend to like him all damn day.”
-His heart cracked like a shattered mirror…Riddle couldn’t believe his ears
-You were the person who supported him, loved him, but this
-No, t-this has to be a misunderstanding
-But the words repeated in his head like a mantra
-It’s true, he’s just an unlikable, stubborn, brat that no one could ever love
-Not his friends, not his mother
-And not you
-It was late in the Heartsabyul dorm and he heard Ace and Deuce talking in the kitchen 
-“God the nerve that guy has, I mean can’t he see how uncomfortable he makes Y/N?” Ace said.
-“It seriously pisses me off, that Gerald guy needs to lay off them. Y/N was right, he’s seriously such a fucking bossy brat.”
-My goodness, you always did tell him to keep his cool and hear everything out before making judgements…
-But this Gerald fellow now has a whole new problem besides his shitty attitude
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twistedmusings · 4 years ago
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How the dorm leaders react when they catch you kissing someone from their dorm [Part 2]
A/N: AND HERE IT IS! Oh my god I still can't believe I managed to get this done! I actually stayed on task! Honestly these three were probably my favourite from the original post, I've had far too much fun writing these bois.
And what can I say? Playfully flirty MC is a good MC u wu
Warnings: Heavy smooching, possessive talk, and the reader just really pushing the dorm leader's buttons~
Part 1 here!
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“How dare you...?”
Vil was more than happy to be coming back to Pomefiore with all the stuff that had happened today. Classes were more annoying than usual, he had to chase Leona down to tell him to get his work done and there had been some problems in the modeling studio that caused the lights to be brighter than usual and now he had a headache that only a nap could fix.
Thing was, if he wanted to keep his schedule as tight as possible he would need to stay awake for...another 6 hours.
One good thing was waiting for him though. Rook had greeted him at the entrance and let him know that the Ramshackle prefect was in the dorm today as per his request.
Good.
This would keep him awake. He remembers promising you a lesson in proper skincare in order to remedy whatever you did once you woke up in the morning. Deep in the back of his head he remembers you telling him that you just splash cold water on your face but he preferred to think that you at least put some sort of moisturizer. Maybe.
He rushes to his room to freshen up and makes sure that he has the materials he needs. Vil had decided that his own brand of face cleansing products would be a good start for your skin. The tingles in his fingertips went ignored as he thought of you thinking about him in the morning. It wasn’t that sort of thing at all, he reminded himself. Dorm leaders were supposed to help each other out, despite how often they were at each other’s throats, and he was just fulfilling his role not just as a dorm leader but as a...friend.
Vil takes one last look at the mirror and makes his way down the row of rooms in Pomefiore to reach the Lounge, only to stop when he sees you being pulled into one of the many rooms by what was clearly a Pomefiore’s students hand.
Wait what?
It’s almost alarming how quickly he approaches the door and puts his foot in it, choosing to stay quiet as he sees that the two people in the room didn’t even bother to wonder why the door hadn’t closed all the way. The student was pressing kisses against your lips in small intervals, choosing instead to talk as you run your hands up the expensive purple robe and taking in the little designs.
“I had a new lip scrub I wanted you to try out.”
“Really? Then why aren’t we in the bathroom?"
“That’s rather forward for a dorm leader. Is everyone in Ramshackle this daring?”
Vil couldn’t even pinpoint the student’s name. That was your first offense. The only thing he remembers about him is the man’s caramel brown hair and how it contrasted beautifully against his dark skin. After that, nothing could pop into his head that would make that student even remotely interesting for you to be hanging off of him like that! Of all the people to be with, it just had to be a nameless potato, didn’t it?
The hairs at the back of his head stand up as the potato hands you what he believes to be the best lip scrub in the business, which only makes the alarms in Vil’s head go off even louder. That brand wasn’t even known for doing lip scrubs! In fact, they once put out a three in one shampoo/conditioner and the fact that the student even had that brand in the dorms and you just blatantly accepting it was your second offense.
And as much as he wanted to focus on that being the thing that truly bothered him, he felt the alarms deafening him as he saw the potato’s hands wrap around your waist as he kissed you again, your lips parting to let him inside.
He shouldn’t be looking at this, he should be leaving and just leave you to your own devices. The lesson wasn’t important, you weren’t that important to him--
Amethyst eyes widen when you tilt your head as the student starts kissing down your neck, already choosing one spot to make his own as he licks and nips at the skin while you dig your fingers into his robe.
Vil didn’t really know how to describe the sudden surge of energy that caused him to fling the door open and grab the student by the back of his robe and pull him backwards, eyes glaring at you the entire time as you whisper his name, as if suddenly remembering that you had a previous engagement before this whole ‘sticking your tongue down a Pomefiore student’s throat’’ business.
“Prefect. My room. Now.”
You put your hands up and walk out of the room without looking at him, Vil letting go of the student’s robes and walking out after you. He didn’t even need to tell him that he was in trouble, the student would realize it soon enough once Rook delivered the chores that needed to be done by tonight.
A list only that student would be getting instead of the entire dorm.
Vil closes the door of his room and turns the lock rather harshly, looking back at you sitting at the edge of his bed still staring at the window. You weren’t trying to defend yourself, you weren’t even looking at him.
“I hate to be kept waiting, Prefect. Not just that, it is extremely rude to keep someone waiting just so you can fraternize with someone in my dorm.”
No answer. He grabs his desk chair and sits down so he can face you directly.
“What made you go and pick that potato?”
“Why would that be any of your business Vil-senpai?”
It was very much his business, if you asked him. He would have been okay if it was Epel or even Rook that you had picked to make out with but he wasn’t just going to stand around and watch as one of the student’s whose name he didn’t even know threw all of his work out of the window! So he asked the question again, this time getting a chuckle as an answer which only served to upset him even more.
“Out of anyone in my dorm you could have picked, you had to go with someone who offers you such a low quality brand of lip scrub?”
“That is your problem with this? What he offered me? Me and him just started hanging out, we know nothing about each other! I just wanted to change that.”
His headache was coming back again.
Vil put hard work into everything he did. That was his work ethic and people be damned if they thought it was too much. Maybe they couldn’t handle it but they still respected it, respected his craft and the work he put into it.
So why do you, of all of his recent projects, disrespect him so blatantly?
It was clear you weren’t ready yet, Vil wasn’t done working with you yet. After doing something like this, and right inside his dorm, he knew that you had just taken all of the careful brushes and strokes he had decorated your canvas with…
And burnt it right in front of his eyes.
Which is why he didn’t necessarily feel any guilt when he grabbed your cheeks and pulled his own lipstick out of his back pocket, ignoring your protests.
“Quiet.”
He applies the shade quickly and before you have any chance to protest, pushes his lips against yours.
The kiss is anything but sweet. It’s almost punishing. Vil was reminding you that you were a work in progress. He still had so much left to teach you, so much left to work with you and if you kept rushing things you were going to make him mad. Once he was done with you, you could go about your pitiful little life and kiss whoever you wanted and he wouldn’t even bat an eyelash.
A hand grasps at his wrists as you press his palms on your cheeks, your tongue gently pressing against his lips so you could slip inside--
Nevermind. This sort of impatient kissing would also have to go.
He pulls away and pushes you onto the mattress, your eyes hazy with eagerness and confusion as Vil removes his jacket and gloves and leans down to trap you below him.
“Were you this greedy with him? Did he also get this treatment from you? No, don’t answer. I fear I’ll only get angrier if you do. Now be an obedient little potato and stay still, the first thing I’ll fix is that messy kissing of yours.”
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“ :( “
Snacks runs had to be the most annoying and heart pounding of his usual daily life quests. If waking up was a struggle enough, especially when no special loot such as new anime or manga was available, it was hard to complete such basic tasks without some sort of incentive.
Although Idia guessed that not dying of starvation was enough of an incentive.
He walks down the corridor of his own dorm, humming a quiet tune to himself as he looks down at all the snacks he had acquired. Which, score! They even had a limited edition chip flavor that came with the card of one of his favourite idols! It took everything in his power to not just spend all of his money on more than one bag but he had such a good day today that he knew his gacha pull luck just had to be good.
The door to a room behind him opens, Idia quickly picking up his pace and hiding behind a corner as he looks at who it could be. He isn't against anyone in his dorm but...he didn't have the means to engage in any conversation that wasn't about his current FPS game or Gakemo so--
"Thank you for the help! I thought my phone was beyond repair!"
His hands tighten around the chips pressed tight to his chest, eyes wide in surprise as he sees you stepping out of the room.
Of all people...why were you here so late?
The student laughs as he scratches the back of his head, handing you back your phone and looking away.
“No--No problem! I...I honestly didn’t think you would come to me for help. I integrated the newest magical technology on it as well as voice activated features and a--a brand new messaging app that sends messages faster!”
Idia clicked his tongue as he heard the student speak. Look at him showing off. You didn’t know that he was taking advantage of your naive mind! You didn’t know anything about magic so, of course, all those features would sound fancy!
When it was literally taking your phone and just downloading some fancy new apps on it!
Yet there you were, marveling down at it as if you had just gotten the latest version.
Well maybe he shouldn’t complain too much, even from here he could see your smile. A part of him worried that all this luck he was suddenly getting would affect the luck he would get on his chip bag but...you were worth it.
Such a rare event shouldn’t be left unnoticed.
Maybe...maybe if he stayed here you could walk by and he could open up the ‘bumping into each other late at night’ event?
“So how can I repay you? Do you need anything done?”
Idia tunes back into the conversation as he frowns, looking back at the two of you as the student looks at every single corner of the ceiling instead of looking at you.
Payment? The guy had just downloaded a couple of apps that wasn’t good enough reason to offer some sort of payment. He frowns and taps his foot impatiently as the guy stutters out a few excuses before finally giving you an answer.
“A ki--A kiss? Would that be alright?”
The Ignihyde dorm leader almost falls down as he hears that, retreating further into his corner as he glared daggers at the guy who had just dared to ask for such a bold request.
A k--kis--kiss? A kiss...from you?
This guy was starting to piss him off! He should just be content staring at you! You were a SSR character all on your own! That guy should be happy he even got to talk to you at all and shouldn’t ask for more than he was given! He already rolled for such a life changing event why would he even want more!
His eyes soften when he sees you mull it over. It was okay, you could reject him. Such a guy wouldn’t even be worthy of a kiss from you so you so all you had to do was say no! Go on, [Y/N], just reject hi--
Idia can feel his heart breaking as his muscles stop working, dropping all of his stuff on the floor with a thud as the sound echoes. Yet it went ignored, the other two people in the hallway too busy with their own activities.
When...when had you even kissed him? Idia only remembers you putting your phone away and the moment he blinked you had already pressed your lips against that other guy--!
He should be leaving, why isn’t he moving?
The student’s hand goes to your waist as you deepen it, his face turning a deep shade of red as you pull away and tap his lips.
“Was that your first kiss?”
“...y--yes..”
You were smiling and giving him such a rare, almost ultimately rare item and Idia didn’t know how long he could stare until he combusted.
So all he could do was turn around…
And run as fast as he could.
He ignored the familiar voice calling out his name, footsteps quickly following him as he started to run out of breath.
Making a poor otaku like him run, even now you were still being so cruel to him!
Idia’s door slides open as he bursts inside, ready to bury himself in his bed and never come out again--!
Only to stop when he hears you hiss in pain.
Blue eyes turn around to see your foot jammed into his doorway, not allowing the electric door to slide closed. A part of him wants to immediately go to you and ask if you were alright but he stops himself as the image of your kiss flashes through his mind again.
“[Y/N]-shi! W--What--!”
You rub at your foot and sigh, walking in with a confused look as Idia presses his back against his bookshelf. He knew it. If a SSR character could be brought to real life, this is the sort of power they would have over him.
The kind of aura you were emitting was enough for him to want to get on his knees, but he chose to remain strong.
“I was calling out to you…didn’t you hear me?”
Idia turns his head and looks at the floor, the pain still raw and emotionally taxing than what he was used to. Disappointment was one thing but heartbreak was a complete other monster!
“Shouldn’t--Shouldn’t you be with your boyfriend?”
He spits the word out, annoyed that a guy from his dorm could unlock...no...could get someone like you. You were open to every single activity Idia gave you, you gave him good feedback and didn’t get scared when you two disagreed on something. Every manga he gave you, you read and every anime he told you to watch, you would watch it.
You were receptive, you were attentive, you were what Idia wanted in a real life friend!
He hadn’t dared hope for more!
That still didn’t mean he couldn’t fantasize when he was all by himself.
“Boyfriend…?”
You tilt your head in confusion before chuckling as you realized what had happened.
“Oh so you saw that.”
Is that all you were going to say?! You had just taken his heart and crushed it into tiny little pieces and you were just going to talk about what a pervert he was being!
Someone just KO him now, like right now!
“Yes...I saw. So what? You were just ki-kissi--doing that thing from everyone to see! So you should just go back to him instead of bullying me in my own room!”
Please just leave, he wanted to cry in peace.
Yet you stubbornly remain, just like the first time he met you.
“Idia I don’t know what crazy assumptions you are making but that guy isn’t my boyfriend.”
You put up one finger.
“He fixed my phone…”
Another one follows after.
“And he asked for a kiss for payment. Simple as that. You shouldn’t act like you caught us doing something major. It was just a kis---”
Large hands land on your shoulders as Idia now stands in front of you, head hung low as he mutters something to himself.
“Just a kiss….just a kiss.”
You jump as he gets close to your face, eyes staring at you pleadingly as he cupped your face.
“JUST A KISS? DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? AN EXTRA RARE CHARACTER SUCH AS YOURSELF SHOULDN’T BE GIVING OUT SUCH RARE ITEMS LIKE THAT!”
He shakes you back and forth.
“IF YOUR KISS WAS JUST NORMAL THEN EVEN I...I COULD--”
Idia’s eyes fall on your lips, the rush of adrenaline mixed in with his built up desire for you all culminating in two choices popping up in his head. And for the first time, he knew that hesitation was not an option.
So he dives in.
His lips met yours roughly, not really moving them or anything but just pressing them against you. You put your hands gently on his chest but he takes it as a protest, which only causes him to push them onto yours even more.
This was...disastrous.
He had never kissed anyone before. How in the world did he think that he would be able to kiss you? Ah, maybe this was a dream? Right! He had just dreamed all of this up and you didn’t really force your way into his room to confront him!
His hair flares up when you cup his face, pushing him away slightly and tilting him in such a way that your lips would meet in a much softer fashion. He looks down and sees you closing your eyes, following in your footsteps and melting inside your kiss.
You both pull away slowly, Idia opening his eyes and blushing when he sees you licking your lips and sending him a teasing grin.
A rare sight...made only for him.
“I feel like I just spent all my stamina on this one event...so I don’t want to go unrewarded. Can we go further? I want to go further. What option do I have to pick for you to do that again, [Y/N]?”
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“Don’t touch them.”
“YOUNG MASTER! WHERE ARE YOU!”
Malleus sighs as he looks on at the Diasmonia students gathered around the outskirts of the school, smiling as he sees Sebek directing them each and every way. Sebek really didn’t give up, did he? One of his classes had been canceled and he was eager to see the gargoyles around Ramshackle in a much better light but he figured Sebek would cause up a stir when he didn’t find him in his classroom.
As much as he appreciated him, Sebek didn’t have to walk him to every single class.
He sighs and goes deeper into the woods behind Ramshackle, the small broken path there leading him down a familiar terrain.
This is where he usually walked with you, after all.
Seeing this place in bright light was so very different. Instead of it being illuminated by his lights, the sun peeked out from over the trees and provided a sunny trail instead of the usual moonlight. He took a deep breath as he breathed in the smell of flowers all around, all of them growing wildly around him and defying any human to try and tame them.
His fingers trace some of the thorns he found on some of them, the flowers attracted to his touch and moving closer to his hands as a small vine wrapped around his finger.
All with his magic’s help after all.
This was his safe space. Malleus would come here during his first and second year and lose himself in the wilderness. In here no one would fear him. Here every single thing was responsive to his touches and even dared to touch back. Some of the wild rose bushes also reminded him of him, Malleus adding a bit more thorns around the flowers as in to emulate the very home he missed.
In this lonely place, he flourished.
But it wasn’t so lonely now, was it?
His third year had brought one big surprise. A human. A child of man who did not know who he was or what he was capable of. They looked at him as if he was just any other stranger roaming around their dorm and not the next ruler of the Valley of Thorns.
And Malleus, being the very curious person he is, found himself pulled to your inattentiveness.
He had dropped many hints that he was eager to get to know you more, relishing in the fact that you two were starting to get closer. And while he had hoped to keep his identity a secret a bit longer, he found it almost unbearable for you to not know who he was.
If you were so open with who you were, then he should show you the same kind of respect.
How wonderful that you were now on a first name basis with each other.
Malleus could walk over to Ramshackle dorm now and knock on your door without hesitation, smiling as he sees your excitement at just what places you two would discover in the dead of night.
Bummer you couldn’t be with him now.
He had seen you come out of your dorm and ask Sebek if he needed any help, to which the fae replied rather rudely that no human could ever track down his young master, so he was a bit reluctant to discover any more places without you by his side.
These walks were something you two did together, after all.
So he remained at this spot, touching everything and anything that would strike his fancy while going deeper and deeper into a small clearing you two had found. A large tree decorated its middle, the leaves falling gently upon the ground as the sun shone down on the large pond that provided this part of the forest with the water it needed to balance out the sun’s gentle rays.
“Shhhh, don’t make too much noise.”
Malleus stops as he hears your voice, his head immediately turning towards the sound as he hears rustling behind him. He smiles and turns to where he thought you were coming from only to be struck by a sudden idea--and immediately hiding among the trees and bushes so you couldn’t see him.
Would you be surprised to find him here?
He hoped so. Malleus had the habit of appearing to you suddenly so this wouldn’t be breaking any traditions between you two. If he played his cards right, you might join him on a walk all the way to the edge of the island.
“Prefect do you know where you are going?”
“I do! I’ve been here so many times. Now come on!”
Another person’s voice. No...he had heard that voice before.
Malleus retreats back into his hiding spot as he sees you rush by, holding by the hand a Diasmonia student as he rushes to follow you. You smile and turn around, still holding his hand while the other looked on in amazement at where you had led him.
“Prefect...this is…”
“Like it? Me and Malleus found it a while ago. This is how we know we are close to the edge of the forest.”
The Diasmonia dorm leader smiles as he watches you show the student around, pointing out different sights and sounds as the other watched on in amazement. That student probably had never gone anywhere this secret and while Malleus was glad you were showing off the place you two shared…
There was a feeling deep inside his chest that flared up angrily as he caught the student looking at you more than his surroundings.
Green eyes watch as the student’s hand clenches and unclenches, seemingly working up the courage to do something as you continue speaking. Which was rather rude, in Malleus’s opinion. You were explaining some wonderful things about the flora here and he was just staring at you without engaging in the conversation.
And how did you two know each other? Malleus had never mentioned you in Diasmonia except to Silver and Lilia, had he known you before him?
Malleus hands grip the tree bark tighter as the student takes your hand, stopping your explanation as he gets you to focus your attention on him.
What--?
“I’ve been eager to find some time alone with you.”
The student clears his throat before pulling you by the hand gently, your surprised look turning into one of playfulness as you follow along with his movements. He leads you to the edge of the pond, spinning you around as you allow him to position you in such a way that you are now closer to him than before.
Which only makes the angry feeling in Malleus’s gut flare up even more.
“Have you now? What for?”
An answer Malleus wanted to know as well.
Blushing, the student smiles and leads you into a dance with no music which only served to make you laugh and make Malleus’s fingers dig deep into the wood of the poor tree.
In the dragon fae’s eyes, you two are dancing for hours without caring about who was around. Why had he even brought you here? This student was part of Sebek’s surveillance crew and yet here he was not doing his job. But he wasn’t the one who brought you here…
You were.
Your actions were lost on Malleus as the dance finishes up, the student dipping you low before bringing you up.
“So you brought me here to dance? Who knew Diasmonia students were so charming.”
Malleus didn’t like the way you were smiling, nor how your hands rested on the student’s shoulders. He hadn’t seen this side of you before, you were playing along with this student and his motives.
Had you always been so playful? Malleus had only seen you during the night and whenever you two spoke it was a conversation worthy of two friends sharing experiences together.
But not this...never this…
“Well, not just a dance. I’ve wanted to state my intentions outright.”
The tree starts to crack slowly as Malleus can feel more thorns growing out of the rose bushes around him.
“Ever since you arrived, you have been an enigma to me. You are always so helpful even to those who do not seek your aid. Even now, you didn’t have to help me search for our Young Master."
He wasn’t searching for anyone, he was too close to you for Malleus’s liking and he needed to learn how to respect your boundaries.
“Yet you still offered me your help...and I…I want to...”
The student was leaning closer as his hands slid down to your waist, Malleus staring as you started to tilt your head as you placed your hands on his chest while his lips were dead set on meeting yours--!
Your face is tilted up as cold lips meet yours, your mouth opening in a surprised gasp as the hold the student had on you was no longer shy and timid but angry and possessive. These lips were pulling you in closer and closer, greedily eating each and every sound you were making as the air was slowly stolen from your lungs.
A string of saliva is left hanging as you two separate, your eyes fluttering open as you think of something to say to such a ravishing kiss.
Only for them to open wide in surprise as you see who you had really kissed.
“Malleus!?”
You turn to look behind the fae’s back, the Diasmonia student looking at his Young Master in mild panic and surprise while Malleus presses you close against his chest, clearly hiding you from view.
Right before the student even had a chance to taste your lips, Malleus had rushed out of his hiding place and pulled him away by the collar of his shirt.
For a dragon to watch on as something that was his was so close to be taken away, the surprise must have gotten to him.
“Go tell Sebek to head back to Diasmonia and call off his search. I will be there by nightfall.”
The student tries to stutter out a response but Malleus glares back as he keeps you pressed firmly against him.
“Now.”
You watch the student leave in a hurry, following the broken path you had led him in with. Your eyes peek up to look at Malleus but the dorm leader waits until the sound of footsteps is long gone before tilting your face up again and leaning down to press his lips against yours in another rough and dominating kiss.
Hands push you forward as your back collides with the huge tree in the clearing, Malleus making sure that the back of your head meets the bark gently as his lips never parted from yours. You wrap your arms around him as best as you could and let out an involuntary squeak when the fae decides to pick you up so that you could pull him in even closer.
He is the one to pull away first, hands firmly on your bottom as you wrap your legs around his waist to support yourself.
“Malleus--”
The fae presses another kiss to your lips, effectively silencing you so that all your attention would be on him.
“Don’t ever bring someone else into this place, child of man. Do I make myself clear? This place is our haven and I will not have someone else come steal both it and you away from me. Well, even if you don’t understand, I’ll make sure to explain it to you thoroughly. Now...kiss me again.”
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adrianasunderworld · 2 years ago
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In Chapter 5, who would likely join VDC as well as audition. Majority of the princesses are singers and the most likely to be part of is Snow White. I like thin once Crowley announced that the men will be staying in Ramshackle for the entire month, things go mad...
Crowley: And that's how it goes.
He said before many weapons such as ice, arrow, and sword came in. Obviously they didn't consent on that. But they let them here as it is nice to have them around...well almost. Jamil clearly has many stares after what happened and pretty awkward between Jasmine and Jamil but reconnect their situation. Jasmine even help Kalim feeling this pressure of how things wouldn't be the same but make sure to move forward.
Snow White heard of Neige and she can't help but admire him as she felt the same to him. It makes me think Vil didn't intend for her to be part of VDC given she reminds him of Neige but he can't help but him a great singer and much to Rook's insistence. They ended up friends but isn't much.
Princesses also get to a closeup on their parts as their hardworking seems perfect much to Vil's delight. They even admit that Vil seems to be a great hosuewarden well almost. Given the Epel issue as the princesses are mad for that while also the banning of sweet despites majority if them not even participating. Snow White witness Ace, Deuce, and Grim ate the sweets and was sudden when they got poisoned.
Meg: Okay, when is that Ace guy gonna learn about eating sweets that anger housewardens?
Merida: I dont know, he has a one brain cell.
Ace: JUST SHUT UP! YOU ALL JUST LUCKY YOU WERENT EVEN PART OF IT!
Given there's many princesses, the one who receive the extra ticket will be Aurora since she thinks of inviting her friend while the rest have their friends being busy with something.
Now in VDC, Snow White met Neige and the 7 dwarfs and how they grew to be friends much to Vil's anger. Once the yahoo song came, Snow White is delight to recognize that song but saw Vil being angry and move forward. Snow White follows and was shocked on what happened from the attempted murder. She tries to persuade him to stop like the rest but it was too late and he overblot.
Once the overblot is over and they able to sing their song and vote. They were shocked to learn Rook voted RSA which angered everyone but Snow White since she finds it noble and how appreciate she is a fan of Neige. And now they join in the singing yahoo with Snow White being happy.
By the way, I think Aurora will be surprised once she learns that her friend is Malleus but she didn't think to which Malleus didn't expect.
All the princesses besides Merida can sing, for the obvious reason that all their movies are musicals. But just for the sake of narrowing the list down, we're going to go with Ariel, Aroura, and Snow White as the ones who audition. Snow White because this is her pov. Aroura and Ariel, because beyond the musical aspects of their movies, they are canonically good singers on their own. Ariel singing is a whole plot point, and Aroura was blessed with a good voice. So as the resident music lovers, they're auditioning and Snow is tagging along because it looks fun and she wants to be included.
So they join Ace, Deuce, and Grim and form their little VDC group. They audition, they get selected, except for Snow, who gets the manager role.
Vil the whole time has his reservations about Snow, because she's too much like Neige. They even look the same. Vil though, is an actor, he's very good at hiding it. But despite that Snow gets the feeling he does not like her, but not wanting to rock the boat, keeps it to herself. She knows everyone is counting on the prize money from the competition, and she's afraid tension in the group is going to mess up the chances of winning. So Snow does her best to be a good manager and cheer her friends on to keep group morale up.
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I feel like there would be a whole chapter or two of everyone settling into Ramshackle and seeing how the princesses have been maintaining it.
Vil: Why is there paint all over the walls?
Snow: Rapunzel has been trying spruce the place up.
Jamil: Why is there patches of ice everywhere?
Snow: Elsa patched up some cracks.
Ace: Why won't this light switch work?
Snow: Oh dear. I'll have to ask Belle to fix it later.
Tiana and Vil butt heads all the time on what to keep in the kitchen. Merida, Anna, Jasmine, and Rapunzel all have a candy stash hidden in their rooms. Everyone is sneaking behind Vil for their sweets. Also a callback to Remy the Ramshackle Rat. That's Cinderella. She's domesticated all the rodents in Ramshackle and making them sweaters and everything. Vil may be wondering if these girls are crazy.
Anyway, Snow becomes friends with Epel and Rook, all the while slowly chipping away at Vil. The book is them slowly building up their relationship. Despite Vils reservations about Snow because of Neige, he knows she is not Neige and that she has never done anything to him. They acknowledge when the other does a good job and when Vil helps Epel family out, Snow goes to him afterward and tells Vil how much she admires him as a person. 
“That so very kind of you, Vil. I know you say it was nothing, but it means so much to Epel. You really are a wonderful person, and I just wanted you to know that.” 
That finally cracks the wall between them and Vil becomes very fond of Snow over time. But it all comes crumbling down when they see Neiges practice run with the dwarves. The rest of the book plays out how it did before. Snow follows Vil and sees that he’s about to poison Neige only for Rook to intervene and Jamil to come tot he rescue. The group has to stop Vils Overblot and it all plays out the same with NRC losing by one vote, even with the addition of Aroura and Ariel in the group. 
Meanwhile Aroura does give her buddy Hornton her tickets for VDC. All the other girls have their tickets as well, so there isn’t anyone else she really wants give them to. So she gives it to Hornton, saying she hopes he cheers her on while she’s on stage, to which Hornton agrees. Then finds out her new fae buddy is THE Malleus Draconia and sees his magic in action while repairs the stage.
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honey-milk-depresso · 3 years ago
Text
Meanie (Azul Ashengrotto x Reader) 8
Part 1,
part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8 (END)
The final chapter. Congratulations for surviving this long with my bullshit-
“Everyone, please place the flower we have given you in their coffin.”
The sunlight was shining brightly in the early morning of NRC’s campus, 
but no happiness was to be found.
Just yesterday, you have died.
And it took a moment for Azul to realize that you were truly gone.
Everyone in NRC lined up in a single file to pay their final respects to you, one by one placing their flower in your coffin.
When it came to Azul’s turn, he had to hold himself from crying. He felt as if you were watching him. If he cried, you’ll cry too, and he doesn’t want you to fully leave this world with sadness and guilt.
He looked at you. Even if you’re dead, you looked as beautiful as ever.
He grabbed your cold hands, and placed the flower in the middle of your chest, before he gently used your hands to cover the flower, as if you are holding it.
“I love you,” he whispered, “I hope you go to a safe place.” And he walked away.
=============================================================
Azul walked back to Octavinelle with Jade and Floyd. They were silent. Yes, even Floyd stayed quiet.
The atmosphere was solemn.
Azul was solemn.
Never in his life have he came across death, let alone, someone he hold close to.
He used to love before.
He went back to his office alone and tilted his head up. Jade and Floyd went back to their rooms.
He’s not crying. He won’t cry for you.
Read it.
He heard something whisper.
“What..?”
The notebook.
He glanced to his right, the notebook labelled “ To Azul Ashengrotto”.
“Read it after they die,” Trey’s words echoed in his head as he recalls.
He grabbed the book.
To Azul Ashengrotto.
He stared at it, hesitantly flipping to the first page.
“I’m rewriting this from the accounts of Y/n, Azul. She asked for it. I hope you’re reading this.
- Trey Clover”
So Trey wrote this book for you to him.
“Azul and I were chilling at Monstro Lounge in the VIP room.
Lmao, he was soooo unlucky with his pulls, and had to answer all my questions and stuff. Apparently he thinks Idia is more handsome than Jade. Ooh~ 
I really loved the fact he wanted to spend time with me although he looks so done. I really appreciate it!”
He snorted. That was so you.
“Azul and I hanged out at the Rose Kingdom. I’m so glad Headmaster allowed me to hang out with him! Sometimes I feel like Headmaster is a dad. 
I had so much fun! Though, it’s kinda embarrassing that Azul spoilt me with so many gifts, and all I did was drag him around. I love the octopus plushie he won for me. It’s so chubby, soft and cute, just like him! 
He also bought me food from Trey’s awesome family bakery, and a really expensive pendent. I feel guilty, but I love it! It’s so pretty!”
He sighed. Really? Chubby?
“Headmaster told me I’m going to die in five months time. I’m really scared. I know I’ve joked about I feel like dying cuz of Professor Crewel’s homework, now facing with death, it feels really scary.
I have to tell everyone right? Headmaster told me he’ll tell my friends, that includes Azul. How would he feel? I don’t want him to feel sad..”
He flipped to the next page.
“Azul, Jade and Floyd came to visit me. Actually EVERYONE did! Even Leona and Idia! Can you believe it?? But I was so happy that Azul and the tweels came.
I rubbed my eyes so hard because I didn’t want them to see me cry. I was just so happy to see them!”
“Trey told me something. Well, an offered to do something for me. 
He knew I had a superrrr big crush on Azul, and he said I should tell him. I was so embarrassed at first, but I’m going to die soon, so I have to confess sooner or later right? 
He told me he’ll write a whole record of me of what I want to tell him, and then I can give it for him to read after I die.
Sounds like a good idea, but also kind of cruel. After I die????
What should I do?”
So that’s what you were talking about with him.
“I got to be discharged!
FINALLY OH MY SEVENSSSSS-
I CAN GET FRESH AIR BEFORE I DIE
DO YOU KNOW HOW BORING IT IS TO BE CHAINED TO A BED, DOING NOTHING UNTIL SOMEONE COMES TO VISIT???
PROFESSOR TREIN’S CLASS IS WAY BETTER-
Azul brought me around the entire campus, and to Octavinelle! And we played UNO! Although I lost a lot... But I’m happy I got to spend time with him and see everyone outside of the infirmary! ^^”
“I went to NRC’s Halloween Celebration!
IT. WAS. SO. COOL!!
There were like flying decorations and good food,
I got to see NRC become so lively and colorful! It was amazing!
Also I got to hang out with Azul and the tweels, and of course, everyone else!
I even got to be part of all the scaring and stuff at the Octavinelle’s scare house! heheheh~ 
I love the big finale, I wish it could last forever.”
“I made up my mind. 
I’m gonna ask Trey to help me write that book. I want Azul to have a piece of me even when I’m gone. I won’t leave him alone, and I’ll do everything in my power to do so.
If Trey is giving me the opportunity to do so, I’ll take it! Though, I should’ve done it from the beginning..”
“Azul kissed me. 
Oh my shit-
MMM I SHOULDN’T HAVE DRANK THE PLUM WINE HE GAVE ME BEFORE WE KISSED, I PROBABLY SMELT BAD-
BUT HE SAID HE LIKES IT??? WAS IT A GOOD CALL I DON’T KNOW-
But... I’m happy.. I got the courage to confess to him! On top of that, he said yes! I’m so happy I could cry..”
“I’m going to be giving the notebook to Trey. He’s gonna record it all down for me today. 
Azul, I hope you’re reading this. I want you to flip to the back. I asked Trey to attached something really important I want to share with you.”
He flipped to the back. There was a slip of paper folded, stapled to the page. It also held the pendent he bought for you. He grabbed it, and unfolded the paper.
“Azul, 
I’m writing this to you 5 months before I die. Crowley told me to tell everyone about my condition, but I wrote this for you specially.
Remember I told you in that truth or dare game?
“If I told you I was scared to die, what would you do?”
To tell you now, I’m still kind of scared. But I won’t show it! Pretending not being scared isn’t like lying.
Okay, but a practical thing, you could do anything you want with this book.
You can tear it up, throw it away, hide it or even show to everyone! Totally up to you!
I’m gonna be honest with you, I was and still jealous of you.
You were and are the picture perfect honor student of NRC. I haven’t been in NRC as long as you, but I’m just so jealous you manage to be so cool and flawless in everything you do! Well, maybe except for flying..
But still! You were and still are my role model! You always manage to amaze me! But not only that, you treated me like your best friend no matter what position you are! Maybe that’s why I fell for you, you didn’t show biasness towards me to become my friend. I hope you were genuine about our friendship!
But, I like the fact you actually sometimes don’t need other people to reflect about yourself, unlike me. I can’t reflect about me all by myself. If I were like you, maybe I could’ve been able to live entirely by myself, with my own unique worth and responsibilities. Of course, while still being friends with others!
But when it comes to self reflection, you are down to earth with yourself, you speak to yourself, and that’s very independent of you. Ever since you were little you were like that too, and that’s what made you hardworking and diligent!
I’ll end it right here, to tell you I love you. Ehehe~ Sorry it’s so sudden.
I love you, meanie.”
drip.
Pitter, patter, pitter, patter.
Slowly, Azul felt tears rolling down his face.
He broke. Except... that wasn’t true.
He’d been broken when he first heard you were about to die. He just kept strong for you, as you did for him.
He was so glad, he had spent his time with you.
You needed him. You felt like he’d done everything for you.
But now, you’re gone.
It was thanks to you, he never felt insecure about his past anymore. For the first time he met you, his really lived for the first time. He existed in this world.
“Thank you, y/n..” he choked, smiling meekly at your final goodbye letter to him, as he clutched the pendent he gave you.
“I love you so much...”
From Ramshackle dorm, your slightly dusty octopus plushie rest on the side of your pillow.
From far away, he sensed you hugging it, whispering so close to him although so far,
“I love you too, meanie..”
END
============================================================
HO SHIT-
REBLOG IT I FELT MY TEARS I-
Ok I’m joking
thank you for surviving and following with the story. 
Azul loves you. Bye, have a good day!
@magicpumpkin3 don’t kill me pls-
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angelizs · 2 years ago
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QAMAR YA QAMAR TELL ME MORE ABOUT BEE PLEASE I WANT TO KNOW SOOOO MUCH WHEN I GET MY IPAD I'LL DRAW HER WITH NILLOUFAR AND MY OTHER OCS FOR THE GIGGLES
AMORA YOU WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT BEE???? AND DRAW HER TOO??? I LOVE YOU SO MUCH DOCINHO <33 SENDING YOU THE BIGGEST KISS RN
also I don't think I've seen Nilloufar yet??? I'm going to look for them asap!!
now, be prepared for my Bee lore drop:
she's the prefect of Ramshackle from another world, so basically she's got the role of MC in the game! she's usually very friendly, although more to the introverted side. she's also VERY affectionate with her friends and when I say very, I mean it. yes, everyone at NRC has thought she was dating her friends at least once. she respects their boundaries of course, but if they don't complain about it she will hold their hand, hug them, kiss their cheeks and forehead and noses and hands, play with their hair, rest her head on their shoulder, cuddle with them, all very much platonic.
not to mention she's shameless around these she trusts. if she becomes your friend you bet she will say anything that's on her mind, which includes random compliments that are 100% genuine and some out of pocket jokes that will take you by surprise. while she's usually abiding by the rules and does her best at school work, she will cause mischief at times to entretain her. nothing that could put people in danger, just to mess with them in a light hearted way like teasing or roping them into her schemes.
Bee loves studying the theorical aspects of this new world, it's all so very new and cool to her. magic exists, there are different species, there's people that live under the sea, there's fae, there's a whole new geography and history and politics and culture, from movies to literature to music to games to folklore to traditions, that she can explore. she's very curious, which means she will want to know as much as she can and will make questions to any of her friends willing to answer! she especially is interested in social studies and would like to make ressearch about it, even work with it in the future!
she's in two clubs, the arts club and the mountain lovers club. now, you ask me: how did this happen? well, first she entered the arts club, since it was something she was used to and had an interest on! then, she finds out about the mountain lovers club and gets curious, so she checks it out one day. Jade is very pleasant (he wants more members to the club) and she likes it, but sadly she's already enrolled in one club and thinks Crowley wouldn't let her join another. Jade tells her to not worry about it, he would have a talk with Crowley. the next day, Crowley suddenly lets her take part in two clubs. I wonder how that happened...? nah, no need to worry about it.
if there's one thing she LOVES is sweets. anything with sugar will have her directing heart eyes at you. also, in a disney princess style, she gets along very well with animals. maybe not to the same point as Silver, but they do seem to have a soft spot for her too, which is GREAT because she will want to pet them. Jade has lost her more than once on their mountain expeditions because she wandered around following some cute animal she saw.
and she's the type to "go with the flow", you know? if adeuce get into trouble, she's there to either get into it with them or bail them out. if Floyd appears out of nowhere screaming "Shrimpy" and running in her direction, she will scream one of the many nicknames she's got for him and run in his direction as well. if Leona is napping on the botanical garden and there's space for one more, she will nap alongside him.
Bee will say some random sentences in portuguese sometimes or call people portuguese nicknames. she's very aware no one understands a thing and it's incredibly amusing to her. she will keep doing it, so there's no use in complaining. don't ask her the meaning of the words, there's a high possibility she will tell you the wrong meaning and giggle any time you say it. little menace (affectionate).
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kuroliondragon · 3 years ago
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Status, Friendship and Love p.1 (Riddle Rosehearts x Reader)
The day of your crowned ceremony is approaching and yet Riddle no matter how much he tries can not get you out of his head. He very well knows that you, a royal and a princess no less, due to your status can not have any romantic relationship with him. Yet your view on the matter is different, will he be able to finally express his desire to be with you before the ceremony?
Warnings: reader is princess and a half dragon half human, angst, fluff, slight nsfw
Proper etiquette wasn't one of the things you were good at or had any pleasure of doing. You never really gave a thought about it, just because in your mind proper manners translated to restriction of freedom. In your lifetime in your kingdom you sure had a fair portion of what that included, and as any logical person you didn’t want it anymore than it should be. Of course what would they expect from you? The King had let you run around in the Kingdom, discarding every social rule that applied to you and instead applied new ones. Keeping you on restriction but on different level than the one of your siblings. That's how you were trained, to be a fighter, a warrior and a leader; not a princess. So, how could they expect you to be proper? It was only suffering for you and those involved.
Your guard and your servant had insisted that it was about time for you to start a different kind of training. You asked if you needed a sword or daggers with you but they only gave you a half embarrassed half reasuring smile and said "Don't worry, you won't be needing those.”
Back then you felt confused…Now you finally understood why you had to stay still, for what had been a hour all ready. You weren't able to move a muscle and if you did, you had the watchful eyes of Riddle and Vil scanning your every move. Of course, your servants had to put in charge of their plan these two queens. There wasn't anyone else who wasn't a better fit. On one side you had the beauty queen, Vil, measuring and fixing the dress you have been wearing for so long. On the other side, you had Riddle with his commentary on your dress and posture: 'Shoulders back!', 'Stay still!', 'Back straight as an arrow, Perfect!', 'Stop scrawling (Y/n)!' .
You were about to lose every nerve of patience you had. Maybe if it was only Riddle, maybe you could handle the situation. But having Vil there, was more than a pain if anything! You could never see eye to eye with him anyway, so why for the love of seven had he agreed?!
You were so deeply lost, raging for the fact that you had to spend all day with Vil and his rude commentary, that the second you felt the thin sharp point of the needle, you jumped in the sudden pain. With a quick yelp, you moved away from the two queens. " What the hell are you doing?" You hissed at Vil, who stood displeased, needle in hand.
"Can you please calm down." It sounded more like an order than a pleading question. He really is a queen isn't he?, you thought angrily. "If you hadn't moved, my fingers wouldn’t have slipped and we wouldn't have the situation we are facing now." Vil stated simply but the frown on his face kept scolding you on why you had moved.
"I tried to be as still as possible-" You tried to retort back but you were cut shortly by the dorm leader of Heartslabyul, "Is this language befitting for a future heir, as well as, the perfect of the Ramshackle dorm?" he strictly warned.
Both of the strict queens looked disapprovingly at you. But you had enough. You gave a low growl and turned your back at them. "Is that it now? Acting like a animal? Seems you are no better than Leona himself!" Vil snapped at you. Only for you to give a deeper, more pissed growl.
"In case you don't remember, Vil, I am half animal! Does the dragon eyes and horns don't tell anything to you?" While you did angrily began, your anger seemed to fade in a sort of mockery.
Vil gave a deep sigh and put the needle down. "As you wish then. You keep that animalistic attitude up and see how far you will come. Come to me, once you learn basic communication skills." he said and elegantly left the room.
You let a fierce yell as you ducked your fingers in your skull pulling your hair. "What is your problem?!" your yell directed to the door Vil had just existed. You let another small scream and only then turned to look at the other dorm leader, who hadn't said much —and you knew he had quite a lot to say—and had observed the whole ordeal.
"Are you done throwing a tantrum now?" Riddle's voice was anything but reassuring. He sounded more disappointed and angry than Vil.
"So, you are taking his side?" You looked at the dorm leader in disbelief.
"I am not taking any side. You should very well know how to act and talk as a future ruler. We all have different roles and we act as these role inquire as to. In the very near future you will be Queen or King, a very demanding and important role. Is this how you will sort your problems with growling and turning your back?" Riddle's grey eyes narrowed.
You frowned at his words. You knew he was right. You knew you couldn't keep up that attitude. And yet, Riddle's words hurt more than you imagined. The way his displeased and warning eyes laid on you, were making you feel as if your friend didn't like you for who you were. "Well…if you are so bothered by it…then you can go. Nobody is keeping you here Riddle." You irritatingly declared. You sat down on the nearest chair and looked down on your lap. You gridded your teeth and pressed your nails deep in your palms. If he didn't want you to be his friend, now that you were going to be a ruler, then it was better to let him go the sooner the better…
Riddle sighed and you heard his heels clicking on the floor, moving. You didn't say anything, stayed still, gritting your jaw together in case tears decided to slip from your eyes. You hoped Riddle wouldn’t leave, that he wouldn't leave you alone. If he did that, then did that mean he never trully cared? Did you mean nothing to him?
You were cut off guard when a pair of Heartslabyul heels appeared in your vision and soon a very concerned Riddle squatted in frond of you. He gently took your trembling hands in his. His hands slowly caressed yours in a reassuring manner. He gave them a gentle squeeze and placed your hands in his lips, planting a soft kiss on your fingers. Even through you were instantly relived from your dark thoughts of Riddle leaving you, you had another problem. Moving your hands slightly away and leaning your back deep in the chair you covered your mouth in embarrassment.
Riddle knew you were taken aback with the sudden display of affection. But it wasn't the first time he had made such a gesture. There was one time —the very first one— were he fixed your uniform's cravat and much to his surprise then, you were blushing red. Riddle couldn't deny that he loved making small gestures like these. They were gentlemanly and they weren't as embarrassing for him as it would be holding hands in the hallway while facing the stares of every student of NRC.
"W-What…W-what are you doing?" You asked with stuttering voice.
Riddle took your hands in his again. Gently, barely touching, holding only the lower half. His mind warning him not even a millimeter higher. So in that way he was basically holding your fingers. Holding them in a friendly platonic way, his heart hoping to be more on the romantic side but his mind hissing that would be improper, not only to you as his friend but to your future status as a ruler as well. Riddle took another deep sigh. His heart and head wanted two different things and he needed to balance his situation, before you could realize the romantic feelings under his friendly mask and damage your reputation and friendship in the process.
"Relax." He gave you a small smile with bits of concern painted all around it. He gave another but this time small sigh. The situation was getting difficult to act on. “Truth is…I am very worried about you. I do what I do, to help you. I don't want you thinking of me as some malicious tyrant.”
You who appeared to be back to your cheeky self after Riddle's explanation, added with a little mischief "So you are saying that you aren't a tyrant?" You flashed him a toothy grin.
Riddle noticed your small yet sharp canines and he caught himself thinking how would it be to be kissed by those lips, those sharp fangs biting on his bottom lip… he imagined himself squirming a bit in your embrace. He would hold you by the neck and occasionally plant soft butterfly kisses on your shoulders, blushing at the contact. You would hold him by the waist, pressing him gently in your lap, whispering sweet nothings in his ear as he would, if he had enough courage. He would most definitely let you do the work, he was inexperienced in that arena and he would not know what to do without dying from embarrassment. He lost himself for bit in his little daydream that up until now he never had. He could not afford to daydream, he always had important tasks and duties that needed to be done. But now, as the days of your coronation neared he seemed to be indulging himself in those daydreams even more.
No matter how much he wanted, he couldn’t be with you. The first problem is your friendship, he didn't know if you felt the same for him. Second, is your status. You would be King or Queen of an Empire and he, even though have been taught the way's of nobles, was a commoner from the Rose Kingdom. No one would support this relationship, it would be nothing but a pleasant dream.
You cleared your throat in an attempt to bring Riddle back to his senses, only for his poor face to blush strawberry red the minute the thought about his daydreaming-and-not-so-pure-hearted thoughts struck like lightning in his mind. His slate grey eyes went wide and his lips trembled at the lewd direction his mind dared to have wondered. There was no way he was actually having such thoughts!
He raised his grey eyes facing your gaze. Those piercing eyes of yours, always calculating, always observing, always strategically placed their gaze.... as if they had a mind of their own. If given the chance...would...would they pin him with an unforgiving stare? Would they look at his form and long for it? Would they look at his lips with hunger?
“Riddle...Riddle!” You shouted trying to get the dorm leader's attention once again. But his lost expression showed you that he definitely wasn’t in this reality at the moment. You decided to shook him a bit and yelled his name again.
Riddle let a surprised scream, “W-What?!” as he jumped back in shock.
“You have been really out of it lately...is there anything bothering you?”
Your concern was visible and Riddle’s heart cried in pain when he couldn’t answer the question properly. To admit his blossoming feelings, that grew day by day? To admit how much he longed for you, that even a small moment with you was all he wanted to start his every day? To admit that taking care of you was his priority, that he would give up everything just to see your smile? But Riddle couldn’t say such statements, so he gulped down any rebelling thoughts of telling you his feelings right then and there and answered with a “It isn’t me you should be worrying about, but you.”
He took a breath and stood up, “If you are feeling better, we should move on to Table Manners instead.”
You gave him a weak smile but said nothing more.
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ice-cream-writes-stuff · 4 years ago
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¤°~Ghost Marriage: Lovely Bride To Be?! Part 3°~¤
Previously... 
"STOP YOUR STEP!!"
At the end of the hall, Senior Vanrouge and Sebek were conversing with the ghosts knights. "They became angery just because of a mere joke I made about them. Such a bunch of narrow minded ghosts." Lilia jests with ignorance in his tone.
"Ugh, the guys from Diasomnia! Why did you bring these ghosts here?!" Ace yells out in fear. "You naive ghosts who dare to snarl at Lilia. I'll get rid of you guys!" Sebek said with very little amusement.
Present Time..
After the fight with the ghosts. The student's and Headmaster go to the field so ghosts won't bother them. Students who were also kicked out the school stayed at the field. "Ha...haaa. Ugh the sides of my stomach hurt so much." Ace tries to say as he and Deuce groan and grumble in pain.
"Ace, Deuce." A familiar voice spoke. "Ah, Prefect Roseheart!" The two huff out as they nod. Azul and Kalim stood next to Riddle, but Azul looks at the two with confusion. "Where is Prefect (Y/N)? Shouldn't you two be with her?" The prefect of Octavinelle points out.
The A-Deuce combo only shrug. "I think she got mixed up the crowed." Deuce says as he looks at the growing crowd of students. "How did you guys get put here?" Ace asks the three dorm leaders.
"We had gotten chased out by some ghosts that suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Even though it was valuable time for the three of us to study together." Kalim responded, while Azul shot him tired glance. "Kalim. Shouldn't it be "valuable time where we teach you about studying."?" Riddle could only sigh and cross his arms. "We almost got Kalim to understand the question..!"
"When we stayed in class, a bunch of ghosts appeared. They chased us out while saying, "this will be the brides fitting room!"" Grim watched as more students came up to them. Telling the same tale. "Everyone who was kicked out from campus has already gathered around..!"
"It seems like the whole campus has been taken away by those ghosts." Deuce said rather calmly. Ace on the other hand was more shocked than calm. "Oi! Principal, what's going on!?"
Before Mr. Crowley could respond, Ortho decided to explain. "I'll be the one to explain. You see, yesterday..." Once the young Shroud told everyone of the events that occurred. Everyone went silent. The only person who spoke after Ortho, was Riddle.
"The ghost groom has been searching for his ideal princess. Then had chosen (Y/N) as his ideal bride... That's the idea, correct?" Riddle revised as his expression was oddly calm. "WHAT!!!!" The group of NRC boys all screamed in anger and fear, a lot of other expression as well.
"We need to save her!!" Ace says immediately after the video was shown. "What will happen to (Y/N) if she does marry the Ghost Groom?!" Deuce asks the principal with fret. Mr. Crowley casted his eyes downward, with a somber voice he said.
"If (Y/N) marries the ghost prince, that is the same meaning of signing a contract. Which will mean, once the wedding is over.. SHE WILL FOLLOW HER SOON-TO-BE-HUSBAND TO THE UNDERWORLD!!!" "EEEEHHH!!!" Everyone yelled out in shock.
Mr. Crowley continues: "I put my guard down because I never would of expected someone who meets the conditions of the prince and his ideal Princess would exist in this world." Headmaster Crowley said with dread in every word he spoke.
"(Y/N)... Is going to be a ghost..!?" Epel gasps out with fear. "We can't let that happen!" Jack gruffs out as he bared his fangs. Many others agreed at helping the female student from her impending doom.
"We need to come up with a plan then!" Ortho tells the group of fired-up teens. "How about we start talking with them? We can throw a party! I bet that the ghosts will definitely let (Y/N) go if we just explain the situation."
The young Al-Asim heir suggested to his fellow peers. Rook nods, agreeing with his classmates. "A truly splendid idea, Roi d'or." A slim smile crepts on Rooks lips, "though..." The huntsman drawls out, his eyes turn a bit narrow.
"Do you think you'll be able to persuade a groom who has been searching for his bride for so long?" Rook crossed his arms over his chest as he continues on. His voice hinting with amusement. "If I was in his place, I'd never let my beloved go."
Leona growls, "so our only option is to just beat those ghost into submission." Vil scoffed at Leona and his idea. "Have you forgotten that we all ran all the way out here because we couldn't do just that." The male model said sassily with a frown gracing his painted lips. "No matter what we did, we couldn't defeat all those ghosts."
The headmaster starts to speak, "they are truly a infuriating opponent to take on. We should avoid confrontation as much as possible." Lilia starts to ponder as Crowley squawked about. "Lord Sam is well versed in the ways of ghosts and things of a spiritual nature. Shall we go see what he has to say on the matter?"
"Lord Sam... Do you mean Sam from the student store?" Deuce questioned the old fae. Lilia hums, "I was acquainted with his great grandfather." Cater starts to laugh dryly. "I still can't tell when you're joking or when your being serious... Lilia."
"Then we must make haste to the student store!" The headmaster yells as he and the others rush to Sam's shop. As soon as the shop door closed, Sam greets them. "Yo, headmaster and little demons. Whay could you be looking for that brought you all here?"
Sam chuckles and shakes his head. "Kidding! I know you're looking for something to deal with that ghost groom, right?" Sam told the group of teens and headmaster. Riddle is perplexed by Sam and his words. "This speeds things up but it sounds like you knew we would end up here."
Sam starts to laugh once more. "My friends on the other side bring me all kinds of info." Soon Sam's voice quickly turns less cheerful. "But things are getting really dicey. Ghost are tied to this world by a really powerful "lingering attachment".
Sam explained more in depth on what he meant. How they still come back because of the "attachment". "And as long is it remains, they'll keep comin' back." Grim felt realization struck him like lightning. "That's why the ghost of Ramshackle keep coming back!"
"Bingo! Precisely. That's why ghosts are so hard to handle." Ortho asked how they can save (Y/N), saying there was no such item like that to get rid of the ghost permanently. Sam grins and says, "IN STOCK NOW!" Azul looks at Sam selection while Leona tsks.
"Groom and brides are especially quick to meet tragedy. So they turn into ghosts all the time." Sam then holds up a item, "to get rid of a ghost groom. You need the "ring of severance." Slide this ring onto the host's left finger while saying "I shall love you till death do us part." And it will forcibly send him to the other side."
"How could (Y/N) give this to him? She's not even here!" Vil said as he picks up the small ring. Crowley gasped as he remembers something about the ghost groom. "Hold on a moment, the ghost groom was a boy who loved a challenge."
"So if one of you asked for (Y/N)'s hand. He'll see it as a duel for her hand in marriage, you don't have to win. But you must be able to give her the ring and tell her what to say." Lilia giggles at the crows plan. "It'll be fun to watch the drama unfold by stealing someone's bride."
"We shall call this plan... "Operation, Lovely Bride To Never Be!"" The headmaster said confidently, "it's a bit long for a name." Ace mutters under his breath. "Now I must decide on who the grooms will be for his plan." Crowley exclaimed as the male students to crowd and shout. "I'll do it!" "Let me do it!" "As if!"
The headmaster started to sweat with nervousness stirring in him. The gleaming eyes of the students were scaring him! It was almost as if each student was ready to take a role as a groom by ANY means necessary. Which it seemed like the students were readying themselves for.
"Alright alright! Will do a vote! I will write down all of your names and put them in my hat. I'll choose four grooms for this operation. So that means four names will be drawn." Mr. Crowley says with a exasperated look on his face.
_________________________________________________________
(Y/N) sat in the far corner of the "fitting room." She held a blank expression as she looks at herself. She wore a beautiful wedding (gown/suit/ect) as her hair was spruced up and was placed into a (loose/ponytail/ect). A (white/gold/silver) tiara with a veil attached to it was on her head. (Y/N) wanted to rip the thing off her, but then the ghost would force the item back onto her head again.
Sighing and cursing under her breath. (Y/N) felt queasy, or maybe it was because she hadn't ate anything yet. This was all happening so fast! (Y/N) did not want to be married to this ghost groom. She hoped that her friends would find a way to get too her before the wedding started.
"Bleh..." The female utters as she looks at her bare feet. A knock was heard on the door as a soft "coming in" was heard. A slim ghost that wore a white suite appears in front of her. He was the nanny of the ghost groom.
"Come, my dear lady. Your fiance is waiting, he needs your help with decorations and would like your words on it." (Y/N) felt herself become stiff, but agrees. Playing along was her better chance of escaping her "wedding". "Of course," (Y/N) said politely as she walks with nanny ghost.
The two reach the cafeteria, now transformed with pretty decorations and tombstones. Along with dark blue flowers and white sheets cover each table. The nanny smiles at his prince with nostalgia. "It seems like only yesterday you were a small child. Trying to find follow your dream and find your dear princess. A dream you lost long ago with your life as well. What a cruel twist of fate." The nanny said as his voice started to crack.
"If only I had arrived at your room faster, I could of helped you escape..." The sweet prince smiles at his caretaker. "It is alright now, know need to bring up the past. Don't let all that stuff bring you down."
The young princes smile never faltered. "Besides, going through all that pain and sadness is what allowed me to meet (Y/N)!" His caretaker could feel his spirits lift at the princes words. "Oh prince Elias, you are always so courageous and strong."
(Y/N) could feel her heart cry at what she heard. She didn't know that... Breathing in a gulp of air, she slowly walks closer to the two. 'It's gonna be okay..' "You did a great job Elias." (Y/N) said as she gives him a small smile.
The ghost groom returns her smile tenfold as he looks at his bride. "My goodness, (Y/N)! You look just as beautiful as a.. Well beautiful than an' undead flower!" Elias said happily, (Y/N) giggles at his childish wording.
"Thanks." The caretaker gives the two a tender look. "You both are just perfect for one another. Prince Elias, we must get you ready before nightfall. You have to look your best for your princess."
The caretaker jests as he pushes the prince out of the cafeteria. "Wha- but I wanted to-!" "No sir, you must get ready. *Sigh* your still a stubborn little boy too." Elias waves at (Y/N), "I shall see you soon, my love!"
Once the two were gone, the ghost soldiers take (Y/N) back to the dressing room. Before the door closed, (Y/N) asks them something. "Can I please have something to eat? I haven't ate in a few hours."
To be continued...
(Okay, part three was supposed to be the end of the series. But that didn't happen, so I'll do my best to make sure part four is the last installment. I really wanna get to work for the Halloween event for Twst and a bunch of other stories I wanna put on this account! But I have to wait until I finish part four. Thanks for reading!)
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doorsclosingslowly · 3 years ago
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They've Made of Our Bodies a Bleeding Stair
Jesper and Kaz try to retrieve Inej from Ketterdam without being recognized and murdered—and without Kaz getting ransomed back to Ravka as the the wayward Sun Summoner.
11k | Sun Summoner Kaz AU pt. 2 | Jesper/Kaz, Inej, past Kaz/Darkling content note: non-linear narrative, explicit sex, roleplay of past rape
“I want you to be him.”
“Of course,” Jesper replies. Then, articulately, once his brain’s caught up, “Uh. What?”
“The Darkling.” Kaz has turned his face away. He’s looking at the ramshackle marriage bed that takes up the bulk of this room he’s lured Jesper into. He unerringly picked the right closed door, too; he skipped the squeaky floorboards, as if he knew the exact layout of this—but it’s Kaz. He knows everything, even some dilapidated house in the Kerch countryside. The bed was probably a masterpiece of craftsmanship, when it was carved from some dark wood, a thousand years ago or whatever. The way it looks, it must’ve been old already when the previous owners of this farmhouse got it, and from the state of the house, they abandoned this place decades ago. Quite a lot of the furniture’s missing, either sold off when the place was left or stolen afterwards, but that bed was too worthless already.
The mattress is still there too. Probably fucking teeming with moth larvae and maggots and their combined accumulated shit, so it doesn’t bode too well for Jesper, how forcefully Kaz is staring at it.
“Please say it doesn’t involve the bed.”
“You said yes,” Kaz rasps, which is all the information Jesper needs to start gagging. Fake-gagging, for now, but if he sees even one wriggly little worm he’ll…
Bed. Darkling. That still doesn’t really… Want you to be him—oh—
“Yes, Jesper.” And how the hell with his ramrod tense back still turned towards Jesper—Jesper, who’s done nothing at all, hasn’t said anything except to register his displeasure at the idea of bathing in insect faeces and their squirming little manufacturers!—how the hell Kaz has realized that Jesper’s figured out what he probably means—it must be a confidence trick. Kaz likes those. But how—yeah, it’s not the point, but trying to understand whatever magic Kaz is using on him right now is much, much better for Jesper’s sanity than dwelling on the fact that Kaz might just have insinuated that he wants Jesper to pretend to be the Darkling, specifically the Darkling from that time he told Jesper about back in the Little Palace, the time he threw up after. The time he thought he could suppress his discomfort with touch long enough to seduce the Darkling into a partnership—seduce seduce, which means he wants—to flirt with Jesper? To sleep with Jesper? Is he actually saying he—
Oh. There’s a cracked mirror on the wall above the bed. That’s how Kaz saw his face.
Jesper would chalk the hallucination up to a hangover, but he’s not even drunk. Neither is Kaz, unless this old ruin of a farmhouse they broke into this morning is hiding barrels of wine the local youth haven’t made off with yet. Also, if he was hallucinating Kaz propositioning him he would—well, Jesper at least hopes he’d have enough self-respect not to make himself a stand-in for the man who bought and imprisoned Kaz for two years, controlled him by using his fears and modifying his body and cutting him off from every other person in the whole court, taking every single object he could have used to protect himself, and whatever those weird spines in Kaz’ chest are he’s probably responsible for them too. Jesper would not, actually, like the first and probably only time he’s allowed to kiss Kaz to be some kind of revenge-by-proxy thing where he recites the Darkling’s lines while Kaz swallows back bile, and then Kaz beats him up. Or murders him. It’s pathetic, but Jesper always imagined that kiss a little sweeter. Kissing over Haskell’s corpse. Kissing over the Darkling’s corpse. Kissing over the corpse of some other piece of shit who’s stupid enough to try using Kaz as their possession.
“Just warning you, I don’t have the costume or the script, so don’t expect something worthy of the Komedie Brute,” is what Jesper says instead.
Kaz’ eyebrow quirks. “You’re acted before, haven’t you? Improvised. You can flirt your way into anything. That was the main reason I kept you around.”
“You kept me around because I’m gorgeous, funny, and an incredible shot. I just play myself, if it’s seduction! Why would I improve upon perfection?”
“This isn’t seduction. He’s already locked me in the Little Palace for months at this point. Two escape attempts have failed. This is… speeding up the process,” Kaz says, nonchalantly enough it makes Jesper want to puke.
Which won’t help anything. He’s already agreed. And Kaz doesn’t care about moral objections, only practical ones. “I need more info. I haven’t actually met the Darkling.”
“You’ve met powerful men. You’ve met men who believe their righteous cause entitles them. You’ve met men mired in greed and vengeance—you’ve met me.”
“I like you.”
“Pretend you don’t, then. You used to complain about me in the Slat—of course I know, I knew everything that went on in the Dregs. You hated the way I seemed to know everything, and held it over you—so does he. You disliked my single-minded focus, the way you all seemed like pawns to me, my mockery. The way I held myself as something far superior to you. That’s a start.” Kaz limps a slow quarter circle around Jesper, and his dark eyes are burning with loathing. Jesper would hold him if he could. “You’re not asking why?”
“Uh, now that you mention—”
“I’m not going to tell you.”
Jesper sighs. Of course. He’s never expected anything else. Then he stands up straight, assuming his best the stick in my ass is so long it’s knocked the word fun from my brain pose that hopefully may pass for authoritative and slimes out, “What business, Mr Brekker?”
“Sun Summoner. Or Sunshine. He figured out Brekker’s a fake name on the first day.”
“Kaz Brekker’s a fake name?!” Jesper should have seen that coming, really… what does he even know about Kaz Brekker, truly? Except—
“It’s a name. It’s real enough. It’s feared. It’s mine.” Kaz’s eyes travel over the cobwebbed wall of the farmhouse bedroom, as if he was searching for the next lie to spin. Except that isn’t one of Kaz’ tells—Jesper’s seen him bamboozle and convince marks of the most stupid tales, and when Kaz wants them to believe him, he looks earnest. Young, depending on the role he plays, old, eager, stupid or wise. He doesn’t bother lying to Dregs, or rather: he doesn’t bother convincing them, usually. All his words are backed by the brutality of his cane. Who could be stupid enough to question even his weirdest utterances. “It just happens not to be one I was born with.”
“So what you’re saying is, the Darkling’s just not Kerch enough to get you?” Jesper grins. “Ketterdam, really—you know, I always really liked that about the Barrel, that healthy dose of ‘You are who you want and we don’t give a fuck to correct you.’ Anyway. Got it. You’re Kaz Brekker, but he’s a dick. Mr Sunbeam, what brings you into my office this evening?”
“The fete, Aleks.” Kaz shrugs off his coat, and then the purple kefta, too. He holds out the kefta in front of him, like he’s expecting Jesper to put it on. Well. That’s as good a start as any, and so Jesper turns and lets Kaz dress him into the robe he never wanted to wear.
“Then he says, ‘You must be nervous. After all, there are few gatherings in the Ketterdam slums that involve such spectacle.’” Kaz has sanded down his rasp somewhat, sounding almost smooth and seductive. He goes into a spiel of the Ravkan court and the inferiority of the Barrel that thankfully, he carries all by himself. Jesper wouldn’t even know what to say, except ‘Stop talking shit about the Barrel, you prick’ and that’s not exactly in character.
Kaz’ eyes periodically dart down to Jesper’s hands, and he realizes he’s fidgeting with the hem of the kefta’s sleeves. He stops.
“I am ready,” Kas says in his normal voice. His normal talking to a mark voice. “I realized what this demonstration represents—that I belong to something greater. It is as you said—we can offer Grisha and Ravkans hope. We. Together.” He stands up straight. Equally on both his legs. He winces. He’s not holding his cane, Jesper realizes. He’s not wearing his gloves. “I am ready to stand by your side. We should be partners. The Sun and the Dark.”
“Uh… great. We’ll be great together. Do great things. Better partners than enemies. Some of those rumours even freaked me out, you know—that kid with the wind-up toy in his throat—”
“Think before you speak, Jesper,” Kaz hisses. “Never let me lead. Never give me control. Every word is a cue to corral your prey where you want it—whether a compliment or a barely-there hidden threat.”
“Is that what you do?”
“Sometimes.” Kaz meets Jesper’s eyes. The tense mask of his face breaks into a smirk. “To be honest, I find the subtle craft of manipulation is wasted on you. You’ll obey anyway. Let’s go back to the start, and focus.”
Jesper shrugs off the kefta again and then lets Kaz dress him, again. He does his best imitation of Kaz, of that early Kaz before Jesper learned how he takes his coffee and before he saw the brutal twist of his face, that one time when the Dime Lions had Jesper on his knees and shoved a gun in his mouth. He plays the imperious tactician in his office who told his goons to drag Jesper up four flights of stairs with a bag over his head, ready to be shot for his debts, and then sold him on the one thing that gave his life meaning.
He insults Dirtyhands’ father and mother to his face, and gets really into it, too: Ketterdam’s full of idiots who’d miss the love of their life because they were busy trying to pry cobblestones off the streets to sell for half a sausage, and the harbour’s so filthy even the fish won’t fuck in it—keeping the brothels in good fish-ness, haha. Because the fish rent rooms so they don’t get fishy sex diseases from the water. Do fish get diseases from sex?
“Kill me now,” Kaz moans, and that one’s probably deserved.
“Anyway, my Sun Summoner, I’m sure you’ll perform well,” Jesper says with just the tiniest hint of slime.
“I am ready. I realized what this demonstration represents—that I belong to something greater. It is as you said—we can offer Grisha and Ravkans hope. We. Together.”
Jesper moves slowly, idly: not caging him in against the bed yet but definitely implying he can and will.
“I am ready to stand by your side. We should be partners. The Sun and the Dark.” Kaz swallows. “‘That means a lot to me. You mean a lot,’ is what you say now.”
How come the Darkling’s not constantly slipping on his own slimy slime trail?
“That means a lot to me.” Jesper gives Kaz a deep, smouldering look. The pockmarks on his cheeks. The jumping muscle in his jaw. The hint of a pained grimace from standing unaided. The boyish grin when he’s totally fucked over another gang boss and gets to gloat. The vicious hatred when someone touches his Crows. Licking powdered sugar off his gloves. “You mean a lot.”
And that’s it. The way Kaz looks at him—this is when the Darkling makes his move.
“I have been waiting for you for so long,” Jesper purrs smarmily, closing his eyes, moving in for the kiss, and—Kaz isn’t there anymore.
It was a single step backwards, because Kaz has hit the edge of the bed already, face blotched with humiliation, and the way he looks at Jesper is—angry is the least terrible interpretation. If he backs out now, Kaz is going to kill him for pitying him or catering to a weakness that honestly—how is not wanting this weak? But Kaz is Kaz, and Jesper’s just Jesper, and—
“Focus,” Kaz hisses. “You own Ravka. You will own the Sun, too. You have waited for this triumph—take it.”
“Why don’t we take this to the—” fuck you, Brekker, for making me say this— “bed, then? Take off your clothes. Don’t be scared.”
That’s a good dig. The kind of insult that looks super caring, unless you know Kaz enough to understand he sees any crack in his image as a dangerous failure. Jesper’s getting the hang of this malicious flirting thing, finally. When this is over, he’ll need to scrub the slime off himself twice.
Kaz looks at Jesper while he disrobes. At him, Jesper hopes against hope, at the real person he’s roped into his worst scheme yet with a goal that’s still totally obscure; at Jesper and not the asshole he’s imagining in his place. Kaz’ eyes trace his cheeks, dance over his shaved head, catch on the lips.
Jesper takes off his boots and gun belt, and the kefta. He undoes the fly of his trousers, pulls his dick out, and stops. He glares at Kaz, daring him to object to the attempt at making this slightly less miserable—Jesper’s the Darkling, he’s in charge, so Kaz can fuck off with his masochism. He’s done undressing. He’s not taking off his shirt or trousers. That layer of cloth stays on.
But Kaz doesn’t object. He stands up straight, naked, brittle, wincing, and then glancing away he mutters, “Ignore the antlers. He hadn’t done that yet.”
Fucking Darkling.
The antlers stick out of Kaz’ collarbones, uneven tines of—possession, mutilation, and Jesper’s eyes catch on a tiny set of grooves on the left one. The scabbed-over cuts underneath. The bruise from the gunshot. And even despite that horror, Kaz has a nice chest. Serious muscle, a street map of scars and a smattering of dark hairs—it feels weirdly improper to stare at him, so Jesper’s eyes dance down to his knobbly left knee and the softly twisted right thigh with its knots of scars, up to the face where he’s biting his harsh pretty mouth, and down again. His dick is nice, fat but not too long, rooted in a tangle of dark curls.
It’s utterly limp.
It’s pathetic, how much that hurts. Of course he isn’t into this. Of course he doesn’t find Jesper remotely attractive. Of course this is just some weird masochistic proxy powerplay for him, some attempt to prove he’s stronger now and can bear it or whatever the fuck, and Jesper’s just the sad stupid body he’s using to enact it.
And of course not even that is enough to make Jesper bow out. Kaz asked.
“Do you want me to suck you off first? Get you in the mood, even a little?” It’s not just for Kaz, that offer, though the whole thing will probably be less painful and awkward if he manages to coax out some arousal. It’s not for younger Jesper, who fantasized about being ordered to blow his boss as penance more often than he likes to admit. No, this is so Jesper can bury his face in Kaz’ pubic hair for a minute. And cry.
Kaz raises an eyebrow. He sounds arch and ice cold when he asks, “Jesper, do you think the Darkling would suck my dick?”
“He should have. Saints, what an asshole,” Jesper shoots back before he can think. “You need a better class of lovers.”
“By which you’re of course implying that you are much better than Aleksander Morozova, the General Kirigan, the Black Heretic, eternal Conqueror and crowned Emperor of Greater Ravka, Salvation to Grishadom, Master of the Fold and He who chained the Sun, et cetera and so fucking on and so fucking forth the Darkling himself?”
“Given I just offered you a blowjob without bringing useless power shit into it, yes.”
“Wrong data, incoherent formula. Correct answer.” Kaz’ grin is crooked. Inordinately fond, and Jesper would have settled for no longer desperately hiding terror but this is—
Yeah.
“I’m going to try to make this roleplay as realistic as I can, but I don’t know if I can forget enough about how to have sex to sink to the Darkling’s level. Also, you don’t happen to have the address of that Grisha Tailor who mutilated you back there? I need them to make my dick look weird. Corkscrew, maybe. Some warts. It’s probably green. I’d peg him for advanced neurological syphilis but I am about to sleep with you, so— ”
“Did you know, Jesper, that the Darkling always wears a gag when he has sex?”
“Shutting up now, boss.”
“Don’t shut up,” Kaz replies instantly. Very, very instantly. “Just keep your disparagements somewhat plausible. And… rare.”
Only to jolt me back, he’s asking. “Got it. So I guess I’m supposed to loom over you a little? How close do you want me?”
“I’ll need to—” Kaz turns around and bends over to root around in the pockets of his coat, and it’s even weirder, worse, looking at his ass when Jesper knows Kaz doesn’t like him back. Kaz tosses over a tiny bottle. Oil. “Give that to me. Tell me to prepare myself.”
“Just saying it once more, boss. You don’t have to go through with—”
“Stop thinking about the Kaz Brekker you know,” Kaz hisses. “Stop anticipating my reactions. Stop caring. You are the Darkling. You have been waiting for the Sun Summoner for decades. You’ve formed your picture of them. This delinquent flinching little rat you bought doesn’t quite fit, not his limp, not his fear of touch, not his pathetic need to assert himself, but, well… you have time. He’ll learn how to make himself fit into the space you provide him. He’ll become your Sun Summoner.”
“Have I told you yet that I’m going to kill that piece of shit?”
“You’ve mentioned it, once or twice. In the last hour.”
Jesper bares his teeth: a grin, but not. A promise. “Good. I’ll hold his mouth open while you stuff him full of black powder and set him on fire.”
“Stop stalling, Jesper. That won’t make it any easier.”
That won’t make it not have happened.
“If you’re sure this will help.”
Kaz nods.
“Lie down on the bed, then. Is there a—no, no pillows here, roll up the coat and slide it under your hips.” Jesper turns his face away, listening to the timid, stuttering squelches of Kaz stretching his asshole. Jesper doesn’t know what would be worse: if, after everything, he can’t get it up��� or if he can.
Well. He’ll have to. His dick will just have to obey the dictates of the situation, just as Kaz’ body was made into the Sun Summoner. He’s young. He’s still looking at Kaz Brekker, Dirtyhands, naked, who asked Jesper to sleep with him, and that’ll have to be enough. They’ve gotten this far. They’ll force their way through. That’s how you do it. That’s how you gamble. How you lose big. Kaz might have once tried to explain to him something about sunk costs and throwing good money after bad, but Jesper ignored him that night and lost a hundred and twenty kruge to Specht, and he’s never looked back.
“Okay, Mr Sunshine. Let’s consummate our fucking partnership,” he grinds out when Kaz has gone quiet, takes the bottle to slick up his own uncooperative dick, and carefully, he climbs on top of Kaz. The clothes were a good decision: Kaz barely flinches when he kneels in-between his legs and pulls the sleeve over his hand to carefully guide his right knee to rest on Jesper’s thigh.
Kaz is staring up at his face, breathing, just breathing. The antlers in his collarbone frame his bright face—brighter than the candles should allow, like maybe—and his focus is rigid and he’s breathing, breathing quickly—
“Is this teaching you anything yet?”
“Not really,” Kaz rasps, after too long. “Or—I think—maybe it was—” he glances at Jesper’s pathetic, unhappy limp dick. His face twists. “I thought you were into me.”
This is— “I love you. Kaz Brekker, whoever you are. I don’t give a fuck about this Sun Summoner bullshit. I love you. I love you,” because this is—Jesper can’t do this. He can’t. His elbows are locked: he can’t drop his body any lower. He can't go lower than this. “I love you,” until it’s finally over. “I love you. I love you.”
“And I’m telling you again, I don’t know what he does Tuesday evenings,” Jesper hisses.
“You were still with the Dregs, three months ago!” Kaz is wiping his cane clean. It didn’t even really get dirty—they mostly used kitchen knives to do the deed, and in the case of a maidservant who unwisely came to work in the middle of the night, a bullet that Jesper’s already collected and reshaped into something functional, because he might not get to buy new ones. Desperation. Frugality. The Kerch are rubbing off on him. It’s good, though. The fact he’s cleaning the wood is all the confirmation Jesper will likely ever get that Kaz does like the new cane Jesper made him from a cute straight rowan sapling, reinforced with the metal scavenged from all but the most essential buttons on their hodgepodge of clothes. At least there’s one thing of Jesper’s he values. “How can you not know the behavioural patterns of your boss? Are you that brainless?”
“No-one knew what he was up to! He barely came by the Slat. He wasn’t that interested in us.”
“You worked for Per Haskell, Jesper; you worked for that man for years—for nearly as many as I did, when you ran off to Ravka—and now you attempt to convince me you barely know his name?” Kaz still doesn’t look quite as harsh as he used to, or maybe that’s just Jesper hankering for their past. Well, he didn’t used to explain his plans to Jesper as if he was an imbecile—but then, he didn’t used to need Jesper. He had more stooges back then. Now, he only has one. Ally. Friend.
If it’s as weird for him, though, as it is for Jesper being back in Ketterdam after he didn’t die on his revenge suicide plot and the city didn’t, either—well, he might still get murdered for stealing the Sun Summoner or skipping out on debts or something completely unrelated, and Ketterdam’s… well, she’s weathering having her ruling class torn apart twice in short order, once by the Darkling’s conquest and now, by the slow collapse of the Darkling’s overstretched realm after he’s lost his saint/weapon/doll.
The Barrel’s fine—as glary and miserable as it ever was, anyway, but though Kaz would probably insist most of the Mercher’s Council had their hands in gang business one way or the other, their reach was indirect, mediated and secretive enough for the chaos tearing up the Geldstraat not to trickle down as quickly into the slums. And anyway, the involvement of the merchers only ever made life worse for most people. The plight of the rich can only be a blessing.
Right now, they’re inside a nice place in the Zelver district. Close enough to power to feel the death throes, and even disregarding the political manoeuvring and debris and panic everywhere, just looking at the house from the outside made Kaz twitchy, somehow.
His energy almost matched Jesper’s trigger finger.
It’s Haskell’s house, so that unease makes sense.
Haskell’s expensive secret new house far outside the Barrel that they’re despoiling now. They looked as out of place in the beautiful Zelver district as any Barrel rats, with their heads shorn close to the bone so they’ll look different enough to not get recognized and faces wiped with dirt, dressed in a melange of Ravkan clothes they haven’t found a chance to replace yet and tawdry Barrel flash for everything else.
Kaz was wearing two coats when he entered the house, an old rose and amber paisley trench that even Jesper admitted is hideous, though now it’s splattered with blood that actually really ties the colour scheme together. Still gross though, and luckily slung over the chair. Along with the purple kefta Kaz hid underneath, the one he still hasn’t given back. Or burned, which is what they did to the other Ravkan overcoats. On the streets his two coats bulked up his frame so much he looked like a kid that Jesper’s never met, dressed up to play a gangster’s role. He looked nothing like the Sun Summoner anymore, and only somewhat like Jesper’s imagined baby Dirtyhands crawling out straight from the harbour, fifty kilos sopping wet and ready to kill a man and feast on his entrails.
Now, he’s stripped down to a ruffled red shirt over a green undershirt—he conspicuously shunned the yellow one next to it on the washing line—and light blue pinstripe trousers. The shirt is a little large in the shoulders, and he’s cuffed the trousers. They stole everything from a cottage on the edge of Ketterdam. Not quite Barrel flash, but almost—alike in style but with better fabric, something a town edge kid probably bought to look like a cool gangster. Or something Jesper would have bought to look special for a very special date. If he squints, he can almost imagine—it’s the morning after, and—
Ever since the Little Palace the idea of Kaz naked has totally lost its lustre. The idea of his muscular but scrawny, scarred chest, his wiry tattooed arms, his ambiguously demonic hands—it’s all overlaid now with a flimsy ugly sleeveless yellow paper taffeta gown. With normal hands, kept bare as humiliation.
But maybe—maybe they sat together, not on a log in a forest but on a sofa this time, and then in the morning Kaz was cold and he stole all of Jesper’s clothes to wear over his own. That’s much better. (Maybe he just wanted Jesper naked all day…)
Jesper won’t let the Darkling steal his fantasies, too. They’re—
Ouch. Fucking ouch.
Jesper really shouldn’t have added tiny spiky worms to the side of the cane, but Kaz’ indignation was just too funny.
“Let me make this clear—” Kaz rasps, once he’s regained Jesper’s full attention. Half-full. ‘Like he’s plundered Jesper’s wardrobe’ is still such a good look on him. “We are both hunted. Neither of us can afford to be caught outside on the streets of Ketterdam and let whoever saw us live. If we’re going to make Haskell’s house our temporary base of operations, we need to make his death as inconspicuous as possible. We cannot safely anticipate which of his visitors to eliminate and which to fool unless we know whether they, in turn, may be missed.”
“Well,” Jesper mutters. “Mitki might come by. If the neighbours don’t chase him off.”
Kaz raises a single, dirt-encrusted eyebrow.
“Mitki’s the newest lieutenant. Might have made it this—”
“Not Anika? I can understand why a flake like you didn’t rise in the Dregs ranks, but she—”
“Ambush. Dime Lions, five weeks after you disappeared.”
“Rotty?”
“Slit throat. Still no clue who did it.”
“Specht? Pim? Neeta? Big Bol?”
“Razorgulls, knife, last year. Bullet to the head, same day. Hellgate. Hellgate.”
“Muzzen? Ruk? Keeg?”
“Another ‘Gull stabbing, just before I left. Hellgate, again. Keeg just disappeared, though. Might still be alive somewhere over the True Sea, if he’s clever. Not that he was, he’s probably floating, poor sod.” Jesper shrugs. After a while, it just gets too much: the beginning of the Dregs’ end is seared into his brain, but there aren’t enough synapses for the tenth—or fiftieth—dead friend to hurt as much. “There’s a reason why I didn’t think twice about running when I lost those fifty thousand. Like I said, boss, it’s been a shitshow since you left. Haskell never wanted for new ones, since he got his kids fresh off the street, but he just stopped giving any shit whatsoever, and since you weren’t there to pick up the slack… well, I can see why he didn’t care, now.”
Jesper spares a bitter look for the mountain of kruge next to Haskell’s foot, the mountain he offered Kaz as soon as he saw him, long before Kaz even tried to hack off both his hands and feet with a dull meat cleaver. Long before Kaz had to settle for cutting down to the bone and then wrenching Haskell’s extremities from their sockets by sheer force of hatred, while Jesper puked into the kitchen sink. The mountain he’d never have amassed as the boss of a gang as shambolic as the last years of the Dregs.
The mountain that’s going to pay off Inej’s indenture tomorrow.
Haskell allowed her to rot there. It’s only fair he pays for her freedom with his life.
“Everyone we could use is gone. And you…” Kaz tips Jesper’s chin up with his cane. The world shimmies a little. “You, of all the old Dregs, survived.”
Jesper shrugs again. This is too much to confess to Kaz, of all cruel bastards, probably far too much, but—they’re sitting in the living room of Jesper’s former boss, the man who sold Kaz out to the Darkling and used the prize money to live in luxury, while letting his gang die on increasingly pointless ill-planned errands. The other end of the table is still flecked and puddled with slow-drying blood—not to mention the corpse, or corpse-pieces, laying there—but over here, they have a bottle of expensive whisky they found in a cabinet and they’re trading swigs from the bottle, all bitter and clean.
“I didn’t take it too well, when you and Inej just disappeared, and then my friends kept dying. Might have gone on a couple of benders. Might have lost some games. Might have lost some fights. Might have had some sexual encounters with people who turned out to be massive creeps. Consequently, I may not have been technically around to be asked to go on some of these errands, or perhaps I just didn’t notice because I was drunk.”
“Jesper.” Kaz doesn’t even sound surprised. Wow. Thanks for having faith in me, boss.
It’s not really that humiliating, though, now he’s said it out loud. He spent two years making bad decisions and occasionally braiding Inej’s hair. Kaz spent that time getting turned into a doll. Who can say what’s worse? He takes another deep gulp and grins. “You know me, boss. I need some external structure in life. I really need a commandeering asshole dragging me into his schemes to be my best self.”
“And yet, you outwitted the Darkling.”
“That wasn’t difficult, to be fair. Tell them I’m Grisha, search the Little Palace, shoot Kaz Brekker in the head, get executed…” Jesper trails off. When the silence grows teeth, he takes a pull of whisky that’s so desperate it makes him cough, but Kaz is still letting him stew.
They don’t really need to talk about it, though. No value in going over what happened in the Little Palace. No value in discussing anything. Everything is fine now. Yes, Jesper did want to kill Kaz. Yes, he’ll die for Kaz.
And they both know why.
Kaz steals the bottle. It’s incredible, actually, Jesper was just holding it—well, maybe he’s a little more drunk than he thought, but Kaz would probably like being complimented on his pickpocketing. “I didn’t even see you steal that bottle,” Jesper says.
“I’d be angry you’re drunk,” Kaz rasps. “But you’ve been completely useless at all stages of the current plan so far. And the previous one, by your planning—I always forget, in my amazement at what you accomplished, that you failed.”
He says that, but his cheeks are flushed pink with alcohol. His pupils are wide when he looks at Jesper. He raises the bottle to his lips and tips his head back, swallowing what should have easily been ten more swigs of whisky. Thieving bastard.
When Jesper awakes on Haskell’s second softest chaise longue in the receiving room—neither of them was particularly eager to climb into Haskell’s bed, and, in Jesper’s case, not particularly still able to walk up the stairs either—his mouth is dry, his bladder full and the light is poking his brain even through closed curtains and eyelids. And Kaz—he searches the whole house after finishing his business, but yes, it’s true—Kaz is gone.
So are his cane and his current Barrel flash coat and the kefta, which means Kaz is probably safe. Well. As safe as the escaped Sun Summoner can be. Not kidnapped, at least. More alive than anyone stupid enough to cross Kaz’ path.
He’s taken Haskell’s kruge, and left a note.
In Kaz’ sharp hand, the note reads, “STAY.”
It’s underlined three times, and on the back side Kaz has written, “or you will die,” which to be fair is pretty ambiguous.
‘Die’ as in, ‘I mistrust your competence and assume you’ll get yourself killed if you move a finger?’ Or as in, ‘I’m warning you I won’t go out of my way to save you?’ Perhaps it’s a straightforward ‘Disobey and I am going to personally murder you and piss on your corpse?’ All are very real possibilities, knowing Kaz.
To really understand the message, Jesper needs to get into Kaz’ mood when he woke up—hungover, but how much? Enough he hates the entire world, or so much he hates Jesper more? Also, his current way of thinking. Jesper’s usefulness. A point in favour is the fact that Jesper saved him from a fate worse than death, but on the other hand, Jesper forgot to extract a deal from him and Kaz is so Kerch it hurts, which means he’s pared down solidarity and reciprocity and love into exchange, into deals, and all Jesper’s offering are the first three. They shared a bottle of whisky next to the corpse of their old boss, though, and in general Kaz looked like he was having fun more than once on their dirty, miserable long trek out of Ravka. Way more fun than he had in the majestic Little Palace. Also, Jesper’s incredibly likeable. He’s beautiful and funny and stupidly in love with Kaz without asking anything in return, so really it only makes sense that Kaz has finally succumbed to his charm.
(He dug his hand into Jesper’s hair, that night on the fallen tree and twice afterwards, but—maybe that was only to make Jesper squirm.)
Well, he enjoyed Jesper’s company while they fled from Ravka to Ketterdam, at least. That’s the crux of it.
So why would Kaz anticipate that Jesper might want to run anywhere? There’s a well-stocked kitchen here. A far more sensible assumption would be that Jesper might want to make some waffles or go on a morning jog. No, not that one. Enjoy a lavish breakfast. Have a bath, perhaps, after spending two weeks crawling through the Ravkan forest and the Shu countryside and stowed in the belly of a wine cargo ship and then countryside again, this time Kerch. Jesper’s feet hurt just thinking about it, and that Kaz managed to get here, even at the half-speed they settled on, speaks to—well, the same bull-headed masochism as always, but the fact he still refused to even consider stealing a cart or horse or approach any larger settlement before Ketterdam means he must be even more terrified of the Darkling than Jesper can imagine. He refused to leave any trace whatsoever. (And yet he’s back in Ketterdam, the one city in the world he was connected to before the Little Palace, because…?)
Ketterdam is the only city, village, collection of buildings and people they’ve been to for weeks, which means it’s the first chance Jesper has to gamble, but—even he knows not to stake anything on the possibility there’s someone left in the Barrel who doesn’t know about Jesper Fahey, he who owes Pekka Rollins fifty thousand kruge and just skipped town, kill immediately with extreme prejudice.
Well, Rollins is dead now—the only gang boss courageous or aggrieved or hungry enough to try and covertly resist the Darkling, go figure—but whoever’s head Lion now probably won’t even let Jesper try to spin an argument about how he really owes that money to ‘Pekka Rollins’ Dime Lions’, not any successor organizations. No such luck, and anyway, people stupid enough to bounce on their debts are fair game to any gang in the Barrel. They don’t cooperate on much, not even for mutual benefit, but murdering dishonest gamblers? That’s a team sport.
Jesper’s last recklessly suicidal plan worked out fantastic, so maybe he should find a card table. His luck’s turned. He could win millions.
Which Kaz definitely would anticipate, and warn him away from. Kaz is a buzzkill. Just because Jesper’s going to get murdered on sight in the Barrel…
Because Jesper’s gonna get murdered on sight in the Barrel.
If Kaz wants to rebuild his status in the Barrel, there’s no bigger liability than Jesper. And Kaz wants to, surely. He worked his way up inside the Dregs carefully and diligently, spent more time than anyone sane would inside a tiny attic office adding up numbers, and sucked up to an utter piece of shit like Haskell, just so he could one day become a Barrel boss. And now, to rise again, he has to cut off the dead weight.
Which means Jesper.
That’s why he left.
It’s not even a betrayal. They don’t have an agreement for life after reaching Ketterdam, let alone one that says Jesper can follow him forever and ever just like in the good old days. Inej—but Inej’s actually useful to a new Barrel boss, as soon as her indenture’s paid. Jesper’s the weak link here. Jesper’s screwed.
Which doesn’t mean he won’t go down fighting. He knows the way to the Menagerie—the quickest way, the scenic route, the paths least commonly trafficked by Pigeons and the ones usually avoided by staadwatch or gangsters. He knows Kaz well enough to guess which one he’s taken. If he hasn’t woken too late—and by the sun’s position, it’s still early in the morning—then he has a chance to pass Kaz off and… insult him? Beg? Cry? Sell his father’s soul for a position in the new Dregs? Maybe he’ll just have to wear a Komedie Brute mask for the rest of his life and it’ll be fine. He’ll figure it out later.
Jesper draws his shoulders up to his ears while he scurries through empty alleyways, the collar of his fancy pseudo-Barrel flash coat turned up. He’s almost glad that Kaz made him go hatless and shaved bald—thoroughly unstylish and un-Jesper enough he might survive the morning—but there are drawbacks to the disguise in the damp chill.
Also, the disguise isn’t good enough. After some minutes, Jesper notices that some clusters of metal stay at roughly the same distance to him. Eight clusters of—round, small, definitely mostly kruge with a few Ravkan coins thrown in. Thirteen guns. A rifle. Two of the coin clusters are fairly close together and move in unison. Jesper’s dealing with seven shadows, then.
That’s—a lot.
Jesper’s had a little more training being a Durast now, but what he could really use now is combat training. He hasn’t even been in a battle in over a month, unless you count handing Kaz knives while he carves up Per Haskell, and since Jesper had to puke right after, you probably shouldn’t. He’s fought rabbits. Jesper’s sure fought some rabbits in Ravka. Two deer, too.
He could probably escape his pursuers. It would take time, though, time Jesper doesn’t have when Kaz is leaving him behind without a word. He’ll just have to kill them quickly.
At least there’s one of his favourite surveillance detection routes nearby. One of the rare aboveground tunnels in Ketterdam, not used by Pigeons for obvious reasons of creepiness and also because it just leads to a big courtyard behind a factory: a courtyard that’s easy to escape, when you know the gate’s lock is broken. Kaz showed it to him, just weeks after Jesper got recruited, after the second time the ‘Gulls got the drop on him and beat him to a pulp. In the courtyard, he made Jesper shoot some sparrows and some pigeons to prove his worth. Not crows, though, and for a year Jesper believed that detail was just thrown in to test whether Jesper would obey nonsensical orders. It’s still a plausible explanation.
He’ll just have to ask Kaz, after he begs him for a role in the new Dregs. After he kills these seven pursuers.
If.
He catches the first man off-guard and blows his head off when he exits the tunnel, but after that, it’s a stand-off. Jesper, hiding behind a massive wood barrel for cover, against six men ducked into the mouth of the tunnel.
Jesper manages to pick off another man by firing into the tunnel and blindly redirecting the bullet into the first nook, but the second attempt at using that trick doesn’t hit anything, and neither does the third. He has eight bullets left now, and five enemies. Even Jesper can tell that’s bad odds.
Retreating across the courtyard, though—the first few meters are fine, there are enough wine barrels and he can just dash from one to another, slightly nudging bullets off their course so none hit him.
Those guys have far too many bullets left, though, by the time Jesper’s forty meters away from the gate. Forty meters without cover. His pursuers aren’t bad shots either—likely Dime Lions, because there’s no way a Liddy would ever get so close that Jesper has to redirect their bullet—and they’re cautious enough that only two of them are crouched behind that barrel next to the tunnel, now, while the rest are still hidden inside.
This might get a little tough—but if Jesper starts manipulating bullets more obviously, will that information travel to the Little Palace? They know the Sun Summoner escaped with a Fabrikator. Is he painting a target on Kaz’ back?
Is he—
Bloodcurdling screams and groans, and Jesper’s too far away to hear any thwacks but his senses have expanded and he knows that metal coating intimately. Knows that cane.
Kaz emerges from the tunnel opening, Inej behind him, and—
Boom.
The Dime Lion’s shot him.
Right in the chest, and Kaz stumbles, falls to his knees.
Keels over.
Jesper shoots wildly while he runs over, whirling the bullets around the barrel that the Dime Lions are hiding behind—two left, Kaz wouldn’t have let any of the ones in the tunnel escape—desperate to hit something or at least keep them distracted and scared long enough to get there, or for—Inej’s pulling Kaz back by his coat, and she’s still wearing a sheer Menagerie dress, she probably doesn’t have any knives to protect—nothing’s hit yet, nothing’s hit, and all Jesper’s bullets are in the air whizzing around but he’s not hitting anything and Kaz is down and Kaz—
Kaz pushes himself to his knees, and then he stands up.
He’s breathing hard, and in the ugly rose/amber/bloodstain trench there’s a hole above his heart, sooty and burnt, but he’s still alive, Kaz is alive, he’s—
“What are you?” a Dime Lion gasps. Jesper’s finally got a bead on her. He sinks three bullets into her head.
“I just killed…” The other one is less lucky, and Jesper only manages to hit his stomach before he runs out of airborne bullets. He’ll die, but it won’t be quick.
“I crawled out of the harbour before. I’ll do it again,” Kaz rasps, and before the Dime Lion manages more than “Dirty—” a wet squelch informs Jesper of his demise.
That’s all of them.
“Kaz, you—” Inej’s much quicker at Kaz’ side, but he moves away before she can touch him to check his injury. Moves quickly enough he’s probably not on death’s door. He is a good actor, though. She looks at Jesper, and he’s about to join her in begging Kaz to get some medical aid, at least, but then Kaz shrugs off the ruined trench coat.
“Those kefta aren’t entirely useless,” Kaz rasps, grinning like an amused fucking asshole who almost gave Jesper a heart attack.
And then, Inej wraps herself around Jesper.
“You’re alive! I was terrified,” she shouts against his chest, slapping his back and grabbing as if she can’t decide whether to kill Jesper or never let go. “I thought you got yourself killed! You just disappeared, no word, I thought—”
“I may have lost a game where the stake was fifty thousand kruge?”
“You—Jes—” Inej squeezes him harder. “I told you to stop. I’d rather have you, with me, than have you die trying to pay me off.”
“I almost won! But there was no chance I’d get out of it, without indenturing myself, and—it all worked out, didn’t it? You’re free! Which reminds me…” Jesper takes off his own coat—blue and green and purple wave patterns, very fancy, a bit on the small side for him—and lays it onto Inej’s shoulders. It suits her, too—it drowns her a little, sure, but the way the coat reaches down to her ankles looks regal, and anyway, Kaz is a good sewer. He’ll fix this. “Can’t have you catching a cold.”
Before she can reply—tell him again she wasn’t worth risking his life and freedom in every card game he could for two years, when she definitely is, she’s Inej, he’ll do anything for her—he runs away and searches the dead Dime Lions for a new coat for himself, all their money, the rifle, and picks up the used bullets too. Knowing Kaz, he’ll want them to leave this place soon, and Jesper can’t very well try to convince his boss he needs to keep his sharpshooter around when he has no bullets left.
Speaking of—Jesper saunters over to Kaz when he’s done. With his most careless grin, he says, “I want my goodbye kiss before you ditch me.”
“I left you a note,” Kaz rasps. “I should have remembered you can’t read.”
Which as good as counts as a promise that Kaz didn’t intend to leave him behind: that, and the adrenaline of an easy gunfight has Jesper grinning widely. This is the life he wanted. The life he yearned for during the last two miserable years. The Crows are back, baby. He asks, “What now, boss?”
“We leave. Before anyone comes to investigate those gunshots.”
“Novyi Zem?”
“No,” Kaz rasps, just as Inej says, “They’ll let us drown.”
“They what?”
“Move.” Kaz starts limping past the factory, and then doubles back one street over—in the general direction away from the sea. Jesper and Inej quickly flank him. “I went to the Fifth Harbour before I paid off Inej’s indenture. It’s near empty. Old man there said no boats go to Novyi Zem or Eames Chin right now, and no boats come back. Because nothing gets unloaded. Kerch ships can’t dock there. They all get stranded at sea.”
“People started running when Ravka cut us off from the continent,” Inej mutters. “Before the invasion. And now the Darkling’s gone, the Kerch Grisha are either running or dead.”
“Too many refugees, apparently. Something about culture and scroungers and economic migrants. Novya Zem’s closed its ports to Kerch.”
“But I’m Zemeni—”
“You’re just a person. Those borders don’t exist to help you. The harbour watch don’t exist for you, the government doesn’t exist for you—if there’s a choice between cementing their power and your life, every bureaucrat worth their salt will choose the former.”
Jesper wants to argue, but actually, he’d trust Kaz over Novyi Zem a million times. Kaz saved his life when Ketterdam and Kerch would have swallowed him whole. Novyi Zem isn’t any different. “So we’re stuck in Ketterdam, then, where I’ll get shot on sight and you’ll easily get tracked by the Darkling. I only remember one safehouse that’s still uncompromised, as of last month anyway, unless you think we should go back to Haskell’s, boss?”
“Inej,” Kaz rasps. “That shop over there. Buy us a cart. We’re going to Lij.”
“What’s in Lij, boss? Why Lij? Where is Lij, anyway?”
But Kaz doesn’t answer him. Even aboard the cart, directing their new donkey with a seemingly perfect grasp of the roads leading to a small southern Kerch town none of them have ever been to, he refuses to elaborate. He looks tense, though. Jesper reshapes his many new bullets while he walks alongside. If there’s a fight waiting for them in Lij, they’re going to win.
Kaz paces the length of the room. Window, door, window, door—there’s not much space beside the marriage bed, and the air draft of his passing caresses Jesper’s shorn head.
He’s put back together now, dressed in his socks and his boots and his underpants and his trousers and his gloves, though his torso’s only covered by the open purple kefta. Despite the cane, he limps more heavily than before he trekked for weeks through the Ravkan forest. He’s not fully recovered yet, if he’ll ever be.
Jesper’s on the floor. He climbed off the bed—off Kaz, after he ruined Kaz’ stupid get proxy-raped by the proxy-Darkling again plan. He said what he said, and the silence that followed was all the answer he’ll get, and then he sat down on the floor. It’s as good a place to wait as any. Probably more hygienic than the bed, anyway. He watched Kaz dress, until he almost looked like the Barrel lieutenant they both wish he was still allowed to be, and now he’s watching Kaz Brekker Dirtyhands the Sun Summoner pace holes in the old dusty floor of an abandoned farmhouse an hour’s walk outside of the small Kerch town of Lij.
He’s not getting murdered, though. Not for what he almost did. Not for what he said. That’s as good as this was ever going to go.
“It was worse this time.” Kaz directs his rasp towards the floor. He doesn’t stop moving. “I froze. Why was it—it was you. I knew you were—you’d never—with you it should have been more tolerable. Not worse.”
“Thanks for the vote of confidence, boss.” Jesper still can’t decide whether he should be ashamed that he was too squeamish to go through with it. Kaz doesn’t seem as angry as he could be, that Jesper totally fucked up this whatever-it-was-supposed-to-be. Not the mocking disappointment he doles out at Jesper’s predictable failures—gambling, distractibility, lateness, no impulse control and so on—and not the seething hatred when Jesper does something he hasn’t anticipated.
“I turned it over and over in my mind. For a year. What I did wrong. How I could have turned this to my advantage. How to excise this weakness. I thought I’d found—but there’s nothing.”
Jesper would offer to brutally desecrate the Darkling’s corpse again, but it clearly doesn’t help. Kaz won’t let this go. Never mind that he was a teenage thief imprisoned in a palace. Never mind it was him against the whole entourage of the most powerful Grisha. The man who crowned himself Emperor.
Sometimes you’re just fucked. And there’s nothing you can do. Life isn’t fair.
“There is a way to beat him,” Kaz hisses. “And I will find it.”
“You did. Sort of.”
“What—”
Jesper grins a shark-grin. “You’re not in Ravka now, are you?”
“That doesn’t count.”
“Why doesn’t it? No, boss, listen—he didn’t beat you alone, either, right? He had his Tailor making you into a doll. His Fabrikators locking your cage. His soldiers. Hell, Haskell selling you out—so really, it’s your victory that I found you.” Now that Jesper’s trying to explain his gut reaction, it just seems more and more logical. “Why can’t you have your own gang? You practically rescued yourself. You took a look at a boy who’d have gotten shot in a few weeks because he couldn’t pay is debts and he couldn’t stop fucking gambling—you had me dragged up to your office. You took that chance. You saved my life so I could save yours. That’s… planning ahead. Planning years ahead. Well done.”
Kaz finally, finally stops pacing. He sinks into the mattress just slightly to the right of Jesper, so he can sprawl out his legs without making contact. He looks at Jesper, but he’s silent, and his face isn’t giving anything away.
At first, that makes it feel like he’s actually listening. Actually considering what Jesper told him, and agreeing. Kaz is a quick thinker, though. He doesn’t need this long to realize that Jesper’s correct, which means he’s coming up with counterarguments—arguments why actually, he’s still weak or whatever and needs to force himself—and Jesper really, really can’t watch him do this to himself again. Why this, anyway? Why is this the weakness he fixated on?
“Why is that creep so obsessed with making you touch people, anyway?”
“Because it’s easy. Necessary. Even a child does it. Touch is what makes us human, and the Sun Summoner is human, whatever lies he tells himself,” Kaz recites. His eyes are bright. Wet.
“Bullshit. You terrorized the Barrel for years and it didn’t matter at all that you never touched anyone. It was just you. It didn’t even really sink in for me, that you don’t touch people, until I saw the way he dressed you up, how miserable you were.” That’s probably a good place to leave it, but Jesper’s livid. Jesper could mince and mangle fifty Darklings with the pure force of his loathing, and there’s not even a single one around here. That energy has to go somewhere. “You’re trying to tell me the Ravkan fucking palace couldn’t change protocol a little and adapt? If it never mattered in the Barrel, it never mattered at all. He just picked something. If you’d been allergic to shellfish, that’s the only food he would have served you, and he would have said you’re weak for your windpipe swelling up. He wasn’t able control you because touch made you weak. When you’re in control, it doesn’t matter. Because you fucking kill whoever touches you. You don’t bow to them. They bow to you.”
Kaz doesn’t reply. He doesn’t look away from Jesper, though. He just stares down at him, with his eyes still wide and still wet. He mutters, “You’ve turned quite opinionated in my absence, Jesper.”
“In your presence. I’m quoting your words back to you—sort of, it was about the cane, and I’ve forgotten half of it. But you were right. You were always right.” Jesper laughs. “See? Now you’re teaching yourself through time and space! Your masterplan is incredibly fucking elaborate!”
“My—I’m not falling for it.” Kaz is grinning, though. “If I agree now—by this time tomorrow you’ll have done something incredibly stupid and you’ll throw the whole Everything I do is your triumph because you saved me thing in my face. I’m not responsible for your awful jokes!”
Pretending to wipe tears from his eyes, Jesper wails, “My plan! My ingenious plan! Foiled by the dastardly Dirtyhands, oh no!”
Kaz laughs at him. Kaz laughs, and laughs, and Jesper joins him.
It takes a while before Kaz stops, gasping for breath. No-one in Ravka’s ever told a good joke, Jesper decides, because he’s made way funnier jokes before that Kaz didn’t even chuckle at, but gift horses and mouths and so on. Colour’s returned to Kaz’ face: his cheeks are blotchy and red, even after his breathing’s evened out. Kaz mumbles, “You know, that’s exactly how I imagined it.”
What? Oh. Jesper’s sprawled on the floor, leaning back on his elbows, his shirt pulled out of his trousers—his trousers, which are open, and he still hasn’t tucked away his dick. He forgot. There were more far important things to do, and now… well, he probably looks more debauched than Kaz in his purple kefta, with just his prick exposed to the chilly night-time Kerch air while he lounges on the ground. He ghosts a finger over it.
“Do you want me to—do you want to watch, boss?”
“I’d—” Kaz swallows. “Saints.”
Jesper turns a little, so Kaz can get a better view. He doesn’t undress, in case that’s an integral part of the fantasy, just gently trails his fingers down his still-limp dick—though it’s definitely waking up now—and looks up at Kaz.
Kaz doesn’t meet his eyes anymore, but that’s fine: more than fine, when he’s alternately looking at Jesper’s cock and at Jesper’s lips. Jesper darts out his tongue, and Kaz’ pupils blow even wider. Jesper licks down his palm and starts jerking off in earnest. “Hey, boss,” Jesper mutters, and when the head jerks up Jesper blows him a tiny kiss.
“What do you think about?” Kaz rasps.
“I just look at you. That’s enough. I like your face.” The tiny quirk of his lips, the way his eyes dart back down. “What are you thinking about, boss?”
“I didn’t expect you to enjoy this as much.”
“Seriously, boss, I know you’re not that stupid. How many times—”
“Not me,” Kaz mumbles. He gestures obscurely at the room. Jesper. The wall. The floor. The floor again. “This. It’s—not proper. Demeaning.”
“I wasn’t feeling demeaned until you started talking—”
“I was going to make you my right hand, once I took over the Dregs. Not my whore—”
“You were?” slips out, small and breathless, before Jesper remembers that this is for Kaz. This for him to enjoy. The warmth expanding in Jesper’s ribcage can wait. “There’s nothing bad about this. You like it. I like it. I don’t see anyone else in this room, and even if—a very clever guy once told me that you don’t bow to the world. You make the world bow to you.”
It’s scratching that wakes Jesper. Scratching like the sharpening of a knife, quick, impatient, desperate—but it’s Kaz who’s on watch right now, Kaz who found this shallow cave they’re spending the night in, and Kaz wouldn’t let any danger come this close unnoticed. Unfought. Kaz wouldn’t just leave Jesper to his fate—would he?
He wouldn’t. At least not yet.
Kaz is sitting at the mouth of the cave. The moon drenches his matted dirty hair in its white glory, his handmade trousers, his naked wiry chest. His chest which he hasn’t bared for a second since Jesper gave him the kefta, even pulling off the Sun Summoner chemise that they tore into threads while still wrapped up in both of his coats: but now he’s half-naked, head bending down to look at those tines sticking out of his clavicle. Those antlers, those keratinized tumours, those bone cancers. Whatever those mutations are, he wants them gone.
In the right hand, he’s holding the knife that Jesper made from buttons so they could cut the blanket into trouser-shapes. In the left hand, he’s holding one of the protrusions growing from his body.
And then, he starts hacking again.
Viciously, helplessly, like a sick rabbit mutated into its own trap. He misses, once, and the knife sinks into his collarbone: but silently he tears it out again and cuts at the cancerous bone, and the knife’s sharp but the only dents that Jesper can see are tiny, glowing, lighting up the knife that’s flecked with his own blood.
Jesper stirs the potato chunks. Thankfully, the old hearth still works, at least after he and Inej fed it with firewood they brought from the market, and so he’s cooking potatoes in butter and water. He mashes them up with some heavy wooden implement he found in a cabinet, once they’re soft enough—he washed it of course; he doesn’t want to eat moth shit—and then Inej passes him a wooden board of carrots in neat small identical pieces. Show-off. Jesper loves her so fucking much.
“Careful, don’t let it burn,” she says, twirling her knife, and Jesper—well, he meant to stir the pot of what’s apparently becoming stamppot. He did. He didn’t mean to think of how he’ll get Inej and Kaz out of Ravka—
And that’s when Kaz limps into the kitchen. He wasn’t still asleep when Inej and Jesper went into town to get some food—as if the Bastard of the Barrel ever sleeps in, even when he’s far from his titular Barrel—but he begged off the trip. He told them to say they’re working for Johannus Rietveld, if they’re asked, who’s apparently inherited this farm, but—they weren’t asked a thing, anyway, and who knows what Kaz did in the meantime. Who knows what weird cover identity he’s cooked up that they haven’t yet had to invoke. And whether it’s weirder than the one Jesper just created.
Jesper gives him a tender little smile. “Had a good morning?”
“No.”
“Because of last—”
But Kaz can read Jesper at least as well as he can read himself. “Don’t flatter yourself,” he rasps. “You’re the least terrifying person I’ve ever met.” Which probably means Yes, I’m rattled, but I won’t take it out on you. Too much.
“Thanks, darling.” And obeying Inej’s sharp elbow, he goes back to stirring the potato mash, and the slices of rookworst smoked sausage she’s dumped into another pan as well. “We decided Inej needs a proper homecooked meal, now she’s free, and we both haven’t eaten anything worth eating for ages, either.”
“You cook?”
“I grew up with my Da. It was either him or me. We traded off, if you want to know, and I’m pretty good apart from when it mysteriously turns into charcoal. And we didn’t find any Zemeni spices in the Lij market—this isn’t Ketterdam, and this old trader I talked to, she said it’s because maritime traffic to Novyi Zem is down to trickles at this point there’s a real dearth of spices, she couldn’t get them at any reasonable price—”
“Don’t burn the stamppot,” Inej orders.
“Anyway, we found a recipe tacked to the wall behind the oven, so that’s what I’m making now. Something super Kerch. Stamppot—you’ve ever eaten it?”
Kaz makes a sound that’s deeply indecipherable. Jesper can’t even tell whether it’s mournful or happy.
“Anyway, we’re almost done. Spinach now, please—Inej made me stick to the recipe, you know—and then the fried sausage and some salt and… you’ll stay with us for lunch, right, even if it isn’t royal Little Palace fare?”
“We ate unseasoned burnt rabbits in the forest,” Kaz replies curtly. He’s gotten over whatever strange emotion took hold of him, then.
“Yeowtch, they were awful. Why didn’t you remind me to take them off the fire. I know how to smuggle us into Novyi Zem,” Jesper says, carrying the deep pot over to their chosen clean bit of floor. Next to the windowsill, so Kaz can sit down with a little less discomfort—the house has been cleaned out apart from the marriage bed, really, and making Kaz go in there now… Making Inej go in there now, when it’s where last night he and Kaz had sex… And it’s not like they were loud, but who knows what Inej read into them pacing around each other for an hour. This is much less awkward. Besides, Jesper’s recently had some great experiences with floors.
Inej doesn’t stop playing with her knife, even after she balances her stamppot served on woodboard on her knees and digs in with her slightly bent spoon. She hasn’t set it down all morning, even carried it into town when they went looking for something to eat, and while she’s been supervising Jesper’s cooking—making sure he’s reading the recipe, keeping him on-track, bickering with him over unclear or illegible instructions—she’s been twirling it around her fingers. A truly remarkable feat, given that it’s the piece of shit knife that Jesper cobbled together from coat buttons, and he didn’t know what he was doing at all except that it should probably be sharp. Inej really needs to talk him through the finer points of balance if she wants him to overhaul the thing.
“They’re not letting in any more refugees from Kerch, you said,” Jesper starts setting up the explanation for his ingenious plan, while he passes over Kaz’ portion and another spoon he dug out from the bottom of a cabinet and small-scienced back into shape.
“The rich Kerch started running first, when the Darkling advanced. Anyone who’d ever had a Grisha indenture… They probably got in. They had the money. As for the rest… well, we’ve all heard of what happened in Fjerda, unless we’re Jesper and too busy drinking and playing Makker’s Wheel—”
“Hey! I was trying to pay off your indenture,” Jesper complains, while nibbling on his surprisingly decent if underspiced potato mash. “I’m Zemeni. They’ll let me in.”
Kaz still hasn’t touched his food. He hasn’t put it away either though, hand cradling the board instead of throwing it at Jesper. Maybe it’s because he’s too curious about the plan. Jesper should have waited, but he was too excited, and now Kaz is frowning as he replies, “So you keep saying. How does that help us? I assume you wouldn’t leave the two of us behind, after all that trouble you took.”
It feels good, to hear him say that. Almost good enough to forgive that Kaz doesn’t like his lunch. “That’s where my plan comes in. I’ve finally figured it out. If we’re married—”
“We can’t marry each other,” Kaz rasps. Before Jesper gets too sad about that, he continues, “In case you haven’t yet learned to count, we’re three people now.”
“I know. That’s why I’ve been thinking it over for so long. But divorce exists, you know so I was thinking that our story should be—and I’ll write to Da, but I thought you should probably agree first—I married one of you and then fell in love with the other but I still loved both, so I was trying to—”
Inej coughs. Laughs. Yeah, she’s definitely laughing at him, and then she says, “You’re going to tell your father about your marriage in a letter—your multiple marriages, because not only did you get married without inviting him, you already traded in your wife for a younger, prettier model. You lothario!”
“If you think that Kaz—actually, are you younger than Inej?”
Kaz, spoon in mouth, glares down at him.
“I’m trying to save our lives here. I’d appreciate some cooperation! And Da will forgive me, when he sees how happy I am with my new bonebreaking gangster wife and my old knife-twirling gangster wife who I had to divorce for petty bureaucratic reasons. Do you like it?”
Another spoonful of stamppot disappears into Kaz’ mouth. His eyes are closed while he chews, and then he looks away. His voice is hoarser than normal when he mumbles, “It tastes exactly the way I—it’s good.”
“Better than unseasoned rabbit charcoal. Anyway, it might throw the Darkling off our scent some more, if we disguise Kaz as a woman—and don’t be sexist. Women come in all shapes and sizes, no-one’s going to suspect a thing. Also we’re from Ketterdam. If any woman like Kaz can marry anywhere, it’s here. It’ll be a scandal, if they refuse to honour our marriage. Letting a few poors drown outside Zemeni borders, sure, but breaking the mutual recognition of administrative documents?”
Jesper is actually pretty proud of his reasoning here. That makes it even more annoying when Kaz rasps, “No-one will ever believe I’m your wife. I can’t even touch you.”
“No-one’s going to believe I love you? Are you sure?” Jesper flutters his eyes up at Kaz.
“He has a point, Jesper. You won’t be the first desperate refugee forging a marriage to leave.” Inej twirls her knife again. “You’ll need to act the part.”
“We’ll just tell them the truth.”
“Which is?”
“You don’t want to be touched, and if they have a follow-up question, they’d better direct it to the barrel of my gun. I’m not letting anybody non-consensually grope my beloved Kerch wife. Never again. Not over my dead body.”
“Won’t they think it’s weird if Kaz—sorry, your beautiful Kerch wife doesn’t let you touch him?”
“I don’t care. I told you. Let the world bow to us. I love my ingenious, vicious Kerch wife, completely independent of any physical contact we may or may not ever have. I respect my stubborn loyal deadpan Kerch wife far too much to cross those boundaries just for social custom. Also, my sweet murderous Kerch wife has a mean right hook.”
“Thankyou for the demonstration of your acting skills,” Kaz rasps drily, scratching his spoon on his serving board for the last flecks of stamppot. “We’re not going to Novyi Zem, though. There are more amplifiers than just the Stag he forced into me, and we’re going to find the rest. I’m going to tear apart every miserable molecule in the Darkling’s body, cell by fucking cell.”
“And you just let me keep talking?”
“It was entertaining.” Kaz licks his spoon, and then the board. Any second now, Jesper will tell him there’s more left in the pot. “Write your Da. We’ll keep your plan as a backup, in case everything goes horribly wrong. You’ll need a ring, though, to make it official,” and Kaz starts rooting through the kefta pockets.
Jesper can’t breathe. Is Kaz really…? He can’t breathe until he looks at Kaz’ stretched-out, gloved hand, and—
“How the fuck did you steal that one?! I was just wearing it!”
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