#I wanna shake him like a snowglobe

[feathers-second-face]

Random Alastor headcanon

I like to think he cries blood (*cough cough* my last post- *cough cough*). I mean- Mostly for aesthetic purposes and because hes just edgy like that buuuuut...

I got some rambles under the cut that would help it fit into the shows lore better.

This might get long-

So we've been told a few things determine a persons appearance when they die. Their death, the way they lived their life, and aspects about themselves that they hate tend to be amplified.

And another hc of mine (which I think a lot of the fandom shares, but I haven't seen it directly confirmed?) is that Alastor hates crying. He sees it as a sign of weakness, so he avoids it at all costs. In life, he would keep himself from crying for that reason, even if he was alone.

Now as a result of this, he cries blood after his death. Tears are see through, so you can easily wipe them away and even if they smear, they're typically not noticeable afterwards. Blood however, is not that easy to hide. You'd have to wipe your face far more or wash it entirely to get it away. This would make his crying far more noticeable. Whether or not people piece together that his bleeding eyes signals hes crying likely wouldn't matter, so the 'amplify traits one hates' rule is probably only to cause the individual themselves annoyance/anger/distress over it.

That being said, imagine the potential for throwing misery at this man. Everyone's favorite thing to do! :D

I mean- Imagine he has some sort of breakdown. He can't hide it when hes only given a few moments because blood smears. Someone like Rosie sees him and gets concerned because his eyes are bleeding. He knows what it means but he sure as hell isn't about to let anyone else find out. Only problem is that refusing to explain the real reason behind it leads her to think hes hurt or something.

And imagine how he'd feel when she inevitably found out! He'd flip shit. He hates showing the slightest shred of vulnerability, and while I strongly believe he tends to relax around Rosie, he probably still wouldn't want her to see him cry, because why would he ever do that? No doubt shed piece it together eventually, and if she didn't straight up ask him or tell him shed figured it out, he'd figure out that she knew eventually anyway. Neither of them are stupid.

He would 100% have some sort of breakdown about that- I mean, it probably takes a lot to make him cry to begin with (since having a large wound across his chest and a crisis about friendship didn't do the trick-), but hes been in Hell for like- 90ish years? And (at least I like to think so) hes probably known Rosie throughout most of that time, no way he'd never cry once in that time, and no way she wouldn't see it.

TLDR: Alastor cries blood because he hates crying and would avoid it (not confirmed). This makes it harder for him to hide it since you can't wipe away blood as easy as you can tears. Rosie (or another close friend) finding out or seeing this has major angst potential.

If there's any art/writing or anything that portrays anything like this, I would love to see it. Please let me know if you've seen anything that is like- similar to this. My only request would be that it avoids anything relating to s*x or romance (I'm s*x repulsed aroace, so those things make me obscenely uncomfortable).

[uhzuku]

lucifer is so gomez addams coded and that makes me so very happy

[xxxairheadedangelxxx]

I need this fuckin narc to stop being so DESPERATE WHO TEXTS SOMEONELIKE THIS AKECHI BE NORMAL

[devotion-disorder]

i just wanted to say that kuuya is literally everything to me, he's so adorable, so cute, i just wanna keep him in a tiny glass jar and shake him like a snowglobe😭😭 ahh i haven't stopped thinking abt him since i discovered your blog (which is the best thing i've ever done tbh) thank you for making such a perfect pathetic pretty boy🥺🩷

also, on a sidenote, you're art is literally so beautiful!! and i think it's so cool that you can switch between both a dreamy and dangerous vibe with how you make your lines. and the way you colour is addicting and also!! also, your silly doodles make my day❗❗

im trapping him in a snowglobe as we speak. now you can observe him trip and fall in the fake snow and shake him around for funsies :)

(( THAMKYOU you are way too sweet omg.................. im glad you enjoy my silly doodles and pathetic boyes 💥💥 this means a lot to me coming from another yan content creator!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :''D ))

[take-me-home-crabapple-cove]

hawkeye is so fucking annoying. I mean that in the most loving, affectionate way possible because I'm hopelessly in love with him just like everyone else who's ever laid eyes on him — but his annoyingness??? so endearing. my god. i love it so much. he's so unapologetic. im. i need to kiss him. i hate him so much. i need him desperately. i wanna shake him like a snowglobe and put him on my shelf forever and ever and ever

[capn-twitchery]

OC smash or pass!!

Rules: pretty self explanatory. include physical descriptions or pics, and propaganda. the “other” label can be used for “sexuality misalignment” (ie: oc is femme and you’re gay, vice versa or you aren’t into smashing but a specific thing you wanna do with them like perhaps hug or study them under a microscope idc).

tagged by: @esteemed-excellency & @the-dye-stained-socialite (sorry double tag)

ok grace's turn 🫡 (is it cheating to use the arctic explorer art bc he looks cooler in it? i'm gonna anyway)

name: lieutenant edward grace

age: mid 30s somewhere

gender: just a guy

sexuality: aroace but he doesn't know that

🌨 pros:

will be so niceys to you. and everyone else. you can bring him home to your grandma and she will approve of him bc he is very polite

courteous, chivalrous, wants to help in any way he can. ridiculously eager to please

surprisingly romantic!! but old fashioned about it. hand kisses, love letters, little gifts, that angle. you will be getting pride & prejudice-ass letters if you're with him long enough

flexible, but usually a service top. his letter signoff is "your obedient servant",,,,, you get the picture

that one "i like kissing polar explorers they kiss like they're hungry" post that lives in my head 24/7

fine military carriage the Tits™

❓❓vague mystery class zone

needs to be wined and dined first, sorry, he is shy & too much of a gentleman. but it should be a nice enough date

shy. takes a bit to warm up to people before he stops being a stuffy victorian era stereotype

mutton chops

🌨cons:

he's awkward. he is trying his best but he's still awkward. :( negative persuasive modifier. sorry grace

haunted by the horrors 24/7. nightmares 8. anxietyx10000. melancholy 100. terrible sleep. his ass needs to be in the royal beth. no he won't talk about it tho (he's fine!)

self confidence does not exist. eaten by guilt

people pleaser to the level he entirely forgets about himself

stands like a pigeon (it does mean he wears a corset tho. silver lining!)

[sixosix]

Pls write basketball player girlfail childe asking reader to show up to his competition and he yells out “this ones for you”’only to miss like the pathetic loser he is and get benched for the rest of the gamethx

warnings wc 1.2k feminine russian petname (printsessa) used once (1), THIS IS A BIT OF A MESS IM SORRY ELLIE, second-hand embarrassment btw…

“I said please...”

Laughing, you push his face away with your palm, Childe’s cheek squished against it. “What are you, five? Please won’t get you anywhere.” The way he said it, dragged out and whiny, was entertaining, though.

He draws you closer by encircling your waist with his arm. “School year’s ending, won’t you at least give me this one last dance?”

“It would’ve been sweet if you were asking me out for prom instead of your basketball competition.”

“But our situation makes it even more romantic,” Childe argues, well, childishly. He pouts and brings his face within inches of yours, drowning your gaze in a mesmerizing shade of hauntingly beautiful blue.

“We don’t have a situation.”

“Yes we do, printsessa. There’s no one here to hide your undying love for me. Come to my game to make it up to me?”

He looks stupid in all his long-limbed glory, as he bends down and gazes up at you, his lower lip protruding. But you've always had a weakness for his endearing puppy-dog eyes. They have a way of working their magic, and he's well aware of it.

“We’ll see what happens.”

Childe lights up, pulling away just to give you kisses all over the back of your palm. “Yes, yes. You won't regret a thing, I promise.” You haven’t even said a concrete yes, though he’d probably take anything that isn’t outright ‘no’.

You suppose this means you have a basketball game to attend tomorrow.

“Wear my jersey?”

“You’re pushing it.”

“For real? You’re not joking around? No, wait, don’t tell me—you wouldn’t do that to me, would you?”

Xiao’s jaw ticks, far from amused, as the boy in front of him grabs him by the shoulders and shakes him back and forth like a snowglobe. Childe would find his piercing glare terrifying if he weren’t a whole head shorter than him. “Do I look like I have time to entertain and joke around with you, Tartaglia? See for yourself. Second row, black jacket.”

Childe’s grin splits across his face like he’s never had to express any other emotion.

Xiao stares at him warily, as one would to a ticking time bomb. “Whatever you’re thinking, stop it. I don’t like that look on your face.”

Childe’s expression turns serious, his dull eyes drilling daggers to the ground. “We will win. I’ll make sure of it, buddy. Wanna know why? I have a plan, and I’ll share it with the team so I can win this competition and Y/N falls in love with me and everything falls into pl— Hey, why are you leaving?”

“Kunikuzushi.” You don’t bother hiding the look of surprise on your face as you spot him on the second row of the courtside seats. “I thought you were one of the players.”

Scaramouche’s face crinkles in disgust at even the implications that came along with it. “I’d rather not participate in anything involving Childe.”

A laugh bubbles out of you as you settle in on the seat on his left. “And here I thought he said you were friends.”

“He’s presumptuous like that,” Scaramouche sniffs, tipping his chin high. 

“And secretive. I didn’t know he played basketball…”

“Are you joking?” At your bewildered expression, Scaramouche’s brow arches in disbelief. “You don’t know. Childe only started playing because you said you might have a crush on one of the varsity players.”

“What? I just I might. And what does that— Oh, no.”

“Yes. You idiot.”

“I didn’t think his crush was this serious,” you murmur, sinking further into your seat. It might be butterflies, it might be mortification.

The whistle blows; the players settle in position. Your eyes never stray from Childe’s figure, even for a second. (He does look good in his basketball jersey.)

“Crush? Don’t make me laugh. You pair act like you’re on your honeymoon every time I see you.”

Wisely deciding to change the subject because arguing with Scaramouche is subjecting yourself to eventual loss, you wonder aloud, “How’d they even allow him to play? He doesn’t know how to aim for shit.”

Scaramouche smirks. “Probably because of his connections. He’s an asshole like that.”

“Yeah.” That makes sense. You both lapse into silence as the game proceeds.

Childe is doing better than you expected. Even Scaramouche looks vaguely impressed.

“I guess he could play after all,” you comment, whistling lowly as Childe skillfully snatches the ball and maneuvers across the field like he’s a stream of water. You’re briefly entranced by the way he grins and a bead of sweat rolls down from his chin.

The ball is in his hands. You shuffle to the edge of your seat.

Scaramouche leans to rest his elbows on his knees. “What’s he doing?” You can’t tell if he’s invested because he’s rooting for him or if he’s waiting for something bad to happen, because he hates Childe like that.

Childe comes to a stop at a specific distance, cradling the ball against his chest. His teammates do the same, creating enough confusion among the opposing players to provide him with an opportunity to attempt what would generally be considered a violation.

Childe’s eyes easily find yours. You’re not sure if it’s because he’s pinned your location down beforehand or if it’s the magnetic force that’s pulling you to him no matter where you try to look. He grins, all boyish charm that makes everyone oblivious that they’re dealing with a devil in the body of a ginger swoon.

“This one’s for you, babe!” he exclaims, pointing at you with a wild grin, prompting the audience to glance at you in bewilderment. Stupidly, your heart flutters at the fact that he didn’t forget you were watching.

He jumps, his body and arms arching in a graceful form. You swear there’s a spotlight framing his entire body at the moment. Childe flicks his wrist; the ball flies off of his grasp.

And the ball also misses entirely.

A stunned silence washes over the court, broken only by Scaramouche later bursting into a fit of laughter.

“Oh, no,” you say, hiding your face in your palms. Xiao, Childe’s teammate, is seen exiting the field.

“Oh my—oh my fuc—king go—od,” Scaramouche wheezes in between breaths, his knees curled up to his chest.

“It’s really not that funny,” you weakly defend, mostly because your embarrassment is overpowering the part of you wanting to join Scaramouche.

However, your words only prompt Scaramouche into laughing harder, tears in his eyes and his breaths coming in short. You’ve never seen him laugh this hard before.

Below, Childe doesn’t even look humiliated. He stares at the ball rolling away with a frown, as if it’s at fault for his god-awful aim.

One of the players—his enemy—pats him on the back. “Hey, man, you can try again if you want to…”

Childe huffs, turning away. “I want a fair one. It’s not worth anything if you just give it to me.” What a miracle he still has his pride after that.

Childe gets benched, pouting in the sidelines. They did win, but it’s not because of Childe, like he told Xiao would happen—not that Xiao was there to see it. Not even a kicked puppy could compare to how pathetic he’s looking. A wet, crumpled paper might be more accurate.

“Don’t tell me you’re into dedicated failure? You into that?”

You pat Scaramouche’s back twice in response. “He’s still cute, unfortunately.” There might just be something wrong with you. “I’m going to go to him.”

“Weirdo,” Scaramouche shoots back, watching as you leave. “No wonder why you and Childe are perfect for each other.”

[deathdetermineslife]

everytime I wanna talk about my f/o I blank on what to say and default to;

yes so basically like okay so when you think about his character like okay and so I WANNA GIVE HIM A FAT FUCKIN KISS AND SHAKE HIM AROUND AND SCRAMBLE HIM LIKE A SNOWGLOBE RARARRARARARRARARARARARARRARA

I try to be serious but I can't hashtag just selfship things :P

[storyshark2005]

🎁 STICK TO CHRISTMAS, CARRAVILLE!

A TRANSCRIPT OF THE MELTIEST CARRAVILLE XMAS PRESENT EVER (spoilers under cut)

Jamie: "So, eh, I've got you a couple presents... so eh, this relationship's been goin' on a long time, and I've gotta think of like, my greatest moments alongside you...had a lot of ups and downs!"

Gary: (watching in nervous amusement)

*Jamie begins opening Gary's present for him*

Jill (bemused): "Are you opening it for him?"

JC: (realises what he's doing): "Oh, sorry, yeah!"

*Jamie hands half-open prezzie to Gary*

ALL: *IN HYSTERICS*

Gary: (opens already half-open present)

Wrighty (leaning in to see): "What is it--?! AHHHH, I love those!"

Gary: *reveals snow globe*

Jamie: "I just wanted you to put it on the mantlepiece-- a little snow globe."

ALL: 'awwwwww!' -ing

Roy: "Aw, that's nice."

Wrighty: (hearty approval) "Jame, that's sweet, bro."

Jill: "That's cute."

Gary: (happily holds up his prezzie) "It's got Liverpool-Man United commentary picture."

Wrighty: "THAT'S BEAUTIFUL."

Jamie: "That has to go there [in studio?]"

Wrighty: (gesturing for prezzie) "Let me see, I wanna see-- I love that."

Gary: (handing over snowglobe) "It's quite nice, that. Very thoughtful."

Jamie: (shoots Gary a look of fondness)

Roy: (interested, to Wrighty) "Shake it, shake it."

Wrighty: "I love these." (shakes snowglobe, then holds aloft)

Roy: (in softest most gentle voice) "Don't drop it."

Wrighty: (in sweet, childlike wonder) "Yaaay!!"

Jill: "Aw, that's so cute."

Gary: "How much are they in Liverpool?"

Jamie: "Eh, twelve pound."

ALL Laugh.

❤️

Watch this absurdity here: https://youtu.be/FITOGVqRfEQ?list=RDCMUCjXIw1GlwaY1IzpW_jN9iCQ&t=342

[maniacwatchestheworld]

You know... I find it kinda funny how I really like Gabriel Agreste as a character in theory... But in the main universe I fucking HATE this man SO FUCKING MUCH!

I didn't want him to die in a somewhat redeeming way! I WANTED HIS ASS HANDED TO HIM ON A SILVER PLATTER, FOR HIM TO BE BEATEN WITHIN AN INCH OF HIS LIFE, AND FOR HIM TO BE THROWN IN JAIL FOR THE REST OF HIS MISERABLE LIFE AS HE HAS THE WONDERFUL OPPORTUNITY TO SPEND THE REST OF HIS LIFE MARINATING IN THE FACT OF HOW MUCH HE FUCKING SUUUUUUUCKS!!!

But in the movie? He is just the SADDEST, WETTEST, most PATHETIC man alive! And I kinda love him for that! lol I just wanna put him in a snowglobe and shake him around!

And Betterfly in the Paris special!??? BABY! I love him! He is soft and sweet and a precious little darling! I love this hopeful little butterfly man and I want to give him the world!

Basically, relationship with the mainline Miraculous Ladybug continuity has ended. Edgy emo dark mirrorverse timeline is my best friend now! I NEED MORE OF SWEET GENTLE HOPEFUL NICE GABRIEL PUMPED INTO MY VEINS RIGHT NOW PLEASE!

[lovesickbtch]

Lo'ak dealing with drunk reader

THATS RIGHT IM BACK BITCHES

Pairing : Aged up!Lo'ak x Drunk f!reader

Summary : Lo'ak, Neteyam, Kiri and Reader go to a small abandoned building. Reader finds some type of alcohol and drinks a littleeee bit too much, moving to sit on Lo'ak in the corner. He realises how much more ditzy she is and takes care of her. Best friends to lovers wohoo.

Warnings : NSFW, Alcohol use, Degrading, Dry humping,u

Notes : YES IM BACK YALL I WONT GIVE AN EXCUSE FOR NOT POSTING, IM GLAD TO BE BACK. Oh and also I might be like this a bit often so sry lol

"I think I found it?" Lo'ak pointed ugto an abandoned shack in the distance.

"We'll be quick alright? Before it gets dark." Neteyam replied.

The four of you heading into building with Kiri leading the way.

"Bleugh It smells horrible in here" She held her nose.

"This better be worth it"

The four of you were looking for things from the sky people, a human had been living there for a few years before they had gotten killed.

===============

After venturing for a few minutes Kiri had turned on something which played some type of "sky people music" and you had found a bottle of some type of clear liquid.

"Lo'ak wanna do a challenge?" You asked.

"Ehhh depends what's the challenge?"

You hold up the bottle showing it to him.

"Whoever drinks the most"

"Y/n I don't know if you should drink th-"

You pop open the bottle smelling inside. It had a bitter scent, not smelling how you thought it would.

"Hm- seems good to me! You still sure you don't want any?"

You wave the bottle in his face.

"Nah I'm good, just don't start crying to me when you don't feel so good."

He replied in a mocking tone walking into the lounge area.

"Well- more for me"

You look inside the bottle checking for anything before take a large sip of the drink. Soon turning into a quiet coughing fit.

"Woah that does not taste normal"

You take one more sip, with it being a lot more than before placing the bottle on a shelf nearby.

"Ew why did I do that"

You soon forget what had just happened, shifting over to see what Lo'ak was up to.

"I'm surprised your dumbass is still awake, you'll probably get sick from that"

He was sitting on a small couch, his legs spread across the chair.

"Y/n look at this"

He held up a snowglobe shaking it around at focusing on it quite a bit.

You were interested in it too, but for some reason you felt like moving closer to Lo'ak. Too close, but you soon after could feel your legs getting wobbly.

"H-hey Lo'ak can I just-"

Your ass landed right on his crotch him.

"Y-y/n are you alright??"

He was suprised at first, but seeing your eyes lowered and your face flustered.

" 'm sorry" you said trying to move up.

He held you down with his hands around your waist.

"No Y-y/n are you alright? What happened?"

Sure you've sat in his lap a few times but usually it was just with some light hearted jokes.

But right now did not feel like a joke.

You sat back in his lap with one of his legs separating your thighs.

"I- I dunno, can we stay like this?"

"U-uh y-yea just-"

He was too flustered to think of a proper answer, too focused on your body on top of his.

After a few minutes a conversation was going and he started to feel a bit more confident. You however started to feel dizzy and hot.

Being so close to him, your bodies connected. You could feel his warm breath flowing down your neck. Not to mention your core was resting right on top of his thigh, which didn't help because of your horny and dazed state.

He was rambling about some funny events about him and his siblings, being so caught up with what he was saying that he didn't realise what you were up to.

You found yourself slowly sliding yourself up and down his thigh, slow enough to look like nothing's happening from afar.

Even you didn't realise what you were doing till later on. He did though, he was so flustered. The thought of you getting off of his thigh, he thought he was dreaming. But he couldn't let this moment go to waste, so he watched you as you cutely moved around on him.

You could feel the build up of how damp your clothed cunt was, too tired to care about him slutty you felt.

You slightly picked up the pace, making your heavy breathing hard to control.

You looked up at him regretting everything you'd done. This was the worst way to show a friend your true feelings for them. Especially when you're seconds away from cumming.

His eyes were glued to your body movement, the way your thighs were gliding across his.

He could feel your hot cunt getting rubbed all over him. He watched how your perky tits moving in sync with your hips.

"What's wrong? Done already? Surely you aren't, not a dirty girl like you"

Your eyes widened in embarrassment and terror.

You got up straight away but his pair of arms were glued around your waist.

"I don't think your finished yet, cmon get to work"

[selfshipgushing]

I lob my F/O sm hes such a cutie pie and he’s so adorableeee im gonna squish him -☠️🍷

thats real i wanna shake mine around like a snowglobe sometimes

[tiapeah]

CREEEKKK hate this man i wanna shake him like a snowglobe

[mxriviera]

Friend showed me the bosses and asked me to tierlist them and i got attached to Pre-Thinker. He is SO CRINGEFAIL and i wanna throw him against the wall and see if he sticks to it (affectionate). I ended up binging info about this cringe little man. he makes me so rrgh i wanna shake his head like a snowglobe <3

[pinkprettycure]

i think the reason yandere's dont appeal to me too much is because we r fundamentally incompatible see they wanna lock me up in a cage all evil-y yet sexily because they are possessive

but i show blorbos affection by wanting to put them in a snowglobe and then shaking it around. im not being posessive im just having fun if you said hey can i shake him around too i'd be like yeah!!!! awesome!!!.

i think me and my hypothetical anime yandere boyfriend would fight because i'd just feel way too strong in my desire to trap him in a super bouncy ball for all eternity and then bounce him all around

[schoenht]

I wanna shake Rollo like a blender omg I’m so glad I found your Rollo messages 💜

rollo lovers ONLY up in here i want to shake him like a snowglobe and bite him like he's a rubber chicken