#I wake up i check tumblr and THE VERY FIRST THING I SEE

[angronsjewelbeetle]

aaaaAAAAAAAAA THIS IS BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!

This one's for the men in my audience. (It might end up being gn in the end, but I have a male reader in mind at the moment!) (Update: It's gn!) I have Angron on the mind, thank @angronsjewelbeetle and @kit-williams for that! Post nails AU.

Summary: You and Angron spend the first night together after the Nails are removed.

Content Warnings: Slight implication of sex,

Image Credit: @squishyowl

The bed was just large enough to fit him, which meant that it was far too large for you. You weren't complaining. It was largely for Angron, who was maybe twice your size. He was sitting at the side of the bed, clad in only a pair of cloth pants, looking down at you. The bandages were still wrapped around his head, obscuring rough scars from recent events. He regarded you with a soft expression, tears welling up in his eyes.

"Why don't you lay down?" you asked, scooting over in the bed.

He grunted, and shifted over onto the bed. The bed was mostly for you despite its size, but sometimes he would crawl in and cuddle with you, if you didn't go further. In the past, the metal made it so that your cuddle sessions wouldn't be long, and even then you felt bad about the grinding pain in his head. But maybe it would be different now.

He lay next to you, facing you. Your faces were inches apart. His garnet-red eyes were half closed, full of wonder and love. He slid a hand over your side, touching you as if he were touching you for the first time. He may as well have been.

"How are you feeling?" you asked, your voice low and gentle.

"I..." he started, looking away for a second to gather his words. "It doesn't hurt."

You chuckled a little bit, your hands trailing to the sides of his face. They were almost laughably small against him. You ran your fingers along his scars, rough in your hands. He recoiled before steadying himself. His eyes widened and his mouth hung agape a little bit. You could feel him tense up in your hands.

"Don't worry," you said softly. "The Nails are gone. You're safe now."

He uttered your name, careful with it. You tensed up as you heard it, your hands freezing in place.

"Oh, uh... is this okay, darling?" you asked. You felt blood rush to your face.

In the dim light, you saw his eyes glisten. You felt him relax. "It feels nice," he rumbled, his hand light against you. He leaned into your touch, slightly nuzzling your hand. He looked at you with reverence, focusing on your lips.

You chuckled, your lips spreading into a wide smile. You relaxed against him before you pressed a light kiss to his forehead. The bandages tickled your nose where they slightly distended from his skin. He sniffed. His hand left your waist to grab a tissue before he turned over and cast it in the bin.

You knew what to do. "Oh, oh!" you exclaimed. "Keep facing that way. Please," you said.

"Why?" Angron asked, his voice slightly muffled.

You wrapped your arms and legs around him, burying your head into the nape of his neck. His skin was rough against yours, bearing the scars of his share of battles fought. You brushed your lips against him, and he shivered against you. You ran your hand along his chest. He said your name again, his voice rumbling gently.

"Angron..." you replied, your voice muffled against his back. You pressed a kiss to his shoulder, and he shuddered. Your eyelids drooped, and your breathing was slow and warm against the back of his neck. You began to drift out of consciousness, but not before you heard the familiar soft snore of the man that you loved. You smiled as you begin to fade away. It was going to be a long road to recovery, but you were ready to face it with him.

[mayasaurusss]

hello! could you write some headcanons or a one shot about dating lottie in the wilderness??

For sure sweetie. Here you go, enjoy!

I had like six more pharagraps but Tumblr is a coward and didn't let me save them :'(.

Contains: description of wounds, lots and lots of crying, (not my happiest work).

It was at Randy's party that you and Lottie first shared a kiss. With the taste of beer on her tongue, she approached you, intent on finally telling you how she felt. She found you alone, drinking the remaining alcohol from your cup. It was incredibly hard for her to connect her words, which came out more as a string of closely related words than an actual phrase.

You understood what she meant -sort of- and were the first one to ask her about how she felt. For Lottie kissing you was a delight.

But after the party, neither of you made the effort to sit next to each other on the plane. You needed to win nationals, there was no time for unnecessaries feelings.

You were surprised when instead of being greeted with Seattle's skyline, you felt dirt and sand on your skin and a horrible throbbing pain on your side.

Lottie was the first to greet you when you woke up. "The plane has crashed" she says, and she doesn't even try to sugarcoat it. It's the very first thing you hear waking up in your new life.

Her eyes are distant, fear and horror having left behind numbness. It's like she's not even here.

She will stay at your side all day long, tending at your wound periodically until Misty comes.

When night falls she sleeps soundly near you, cradling your weak body in hers.

Hours later, when Taissa discovers a lake, Lottie is the one to help you move. You are leaning on her and she's so careful to move you as best as she can. She's careful, slow and when no one is near, whispers sweet reassurances to you.

The days pass. Everyone tries their best to survive. You can't do anything besides sitting around and checking on your wound, getting redder and redder until a crust forms on it. Then, with a little patience, you can finally help. Both you and Lottie work on the same stuff. If you're gathering herbs, she is too; if you are taking the place of Mari as a cook, she's the one to hand you ingredients.

As time goes on, you can feel something shifting in Lottie's demeanor. She's numb, silent and spends an awful lot of time with Laura Lee.

Your jealousy takes the better of you, and for a while, you don't talk to Lottie. And she doesn't talk to you either. You're left alone with the presence of the trees on your head, until she is the first one to make a move.

She sits next to you, silent. You can feel something in her changing, killing the sweet Lottie you knew. It's then that she tells you about what's bothering her. She sees things.

Your sweet Lottie sees things. Shadows moving in the dark corners of the room, in the darkness that seeps out of the trees, whispers and voices telling her what to do, how to act. She has visions: of death, of fire and frost, of hunger.

For a while you are terrified of Lottie. You don't mean to, really, but what she said to you that afternoon made you wary of her. Who knows what she could do to appease her voices.

So you drift further apart, further and further until autumn comes. It's clear to all of you that death is close. There's no food and the days are cold. So, in the last attempts to make your life worthy, you threw a party. One of those that you went to before the crash, only with no music and homemade alcohol.

At homecoming, you finally try to open your heart to Lottie once more. It's scary, it's sad, but she allows you into her own. The rest of the night is spent laughing, holding her close to you and waiting for death to come. But it doesn't. You wake up hours later, the dust of the earth in your eyes and the sparks of the fire dying next to you.

You had slept for the entirety of the night, oblivious of what happened. No one is interested enough to tell you, and you will come to know it the day after, when Jackie and Shauna fight. Thinking that they had let their hunger run rampant enough to threaten the lives of their friends scares you, but not as much as you thought. Maybe you wished Travis died. Maybe you could finally satiate your hunger.

After Jackie's death, Lottie grows more deranged. You know that she means no harm, but through her delusions, she managed to hold a tool on the entirety of the group. You attend her prayers in the morning, more to fill that hole in her chest than helping yourself. Or maybe, you too need just a little bit of faith.

There is not one day where Lottie isn't near you. She follows you like her shadows follow her, her eyes always on you. It creeps you out sometimes, but you let her. She will randomly go out in the wilderness and come back with herbs and plants she will boil to make you a cup of tea. It's a small gesture, one that you grow to hold dear.

In return, you bring her all the trinkets you find while helping Natalie and Travis hunt. The girl has grown wary of you, annoyed at how you always have to stop to collect some strange sticks, rocks, shells and remains of animals. She had even begun to scream at you once, but you had to endure and bite your tongue.

She will always wait for you with one of her many beverages. Lottie will never tell you that the reason they are uncharacteristically dark is because she let a few drops of her blood in, in an attempt to shield you from whatever the wilderness had in store for you. Maybe it's an attempt on her part to bring herself with you, to make you feel less lonely in that cold hell.

When you eat Jackie, you find Lottie outside in the snow, clinging to where her heart is. She would want nothing more than to wail right now. Her stomach is filled, and she so wished it wasn't.

You take her and kiss her tears away, but nothing will erase her guilt. Both of you cry, hugging each other while snow falls.

Lottie never does anything out of pure malice. Every little thing she does is for the better good, but she knows she's flawed. Somehow, it seems like everything she does is a burden, making people turn against her.

There are moments of happiness even in the most difficult of situations. Sometimes you will walk in the wilderness, letting the snow cling to your boots and cold air fill your lungs. The forest is silent, but you're okay with that. There isn't any need to talk. There's just you and her, embracing each other's company.

You will never forgive yourself for not intervening when Shauna attacks Lottie. You're just too out of it. All you can see is a blur of figures moving, red spilling from them. When you understand that it's Lottie's blood, finally you understand what is happening.

Worry and horror fills you as you fall to the floor, checking Lottie.

Her flesh is red and puffy, blood seeps from cuts near her eyes and brows, flows down her nose and stains her clothes. She doesn't respond to your cries.

You nurse her back to health, regularly checking on her with Misty. Cleaning her wounds, helping her bathe and clothe her as best as you can. Sometimes she'll mumble through her fever, words coming out jagged. She asks you to not let her body go to waste, to eat her if she dies. The mere thought of that makes your skin crawl. You try to reason with her but it's no use, she needs to hear it. So you accept.

The first thing Lottie does when seeing you after waking up is cry. She's not happy to be alive. Maybe she wished for you to consume her so she could finally be at peace, away from this place. But that does not happen. That night, you don't let her go back. As much as she could protest, you don't want to share her to the others yet.

"I am sorry". She doesn't tell you why, but deep down you know the reason. You hug her close, hiding your face onto her neck, "Please...never say anything like that ever again". She falls silent. It takes a moment for her to actually feel the desperation and sadness grow in her heart, but when it does, it breaks her. She almost falls in your arms, hands shaking and tears stinging at her flesh. She wails, like a hurt animal. You embrace her and cry, mourn with her. Words don't come easy, but as you spell them, a small hope flickers in your chest.

"I promise to you, everything will be okay"

[navstuffs]

Emptiness

Pairing: Leon Kennedy x GN!Reader

Summary: You are dead, and Leon wonders why he is still alive.

Warnings: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, long one-shot, leon is suicidial, suicide attempt!!, leon is depressive, MAJOR ANGST, abuse of alcohol, some usage of y/n, cigarettes/smoking, leon is a mess, SAD SAD SAD!!!, leon is suffering a lot, lots of pain, NO HAPPINESS!, dates in italic count since reader's death

Author's Note: idk, except i am sorry i like to make the characters i love suffer and share that on the internet? i made my husband read this, and he doesn't care about leon whatsoever, and he ended up upset for him at the end so you can imagine how this goes. i have more happy leon's fanfics, you can check it out here!

PLEASE, PROCEED CAREFULLY, AS THIS FANFIC DESCRIBES SUICIDE, SUICIDE ATTEMPT, DEPRESSION, AND ALCOHOLISM.

If you have been struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts, you are NOT alone! Here is a link for tumblr support for some helpful information, depending in what country you are! Seek help, you are loved, you are strong, you are wanted!

3 months, 27 days, 3 hours, 5 minutes

The first thing Leon notices when he wakes up is that he is cold. He isn't wearing a shirt, and for some reason, the blankets covering his body look dirty with some unknown substance. He groans, throwing the blanket on the floor. He still wears the jeans from last night, has no shirt on, and doesn't smell well.

The second thing he hears is his phone's ringtone. It had to be Chris. Or Claire wondering if he is alive. He sits up, his hand rubbing his face as a way to make the headache less.

The third thing Leon notices is his hand resting in the empty space of the bed. Your empty space on the bed. He gulps because he hasn't touched that part since returning to the house. He raises his hand as if Leon contaminated the area, the last pieces he had of you.

Leon glimpses under your pillow a very familiar black shirt. One of the ones he gave to you. Leon doesn't remember grabbing it last night. He holds it, checking if he got dirty, but the shirt seems clean. Leon takes the shirt to his nose, smelling it. 

His phone rings a second time breaking his trance. He gets up from the bed and sighs when he sees the nightstands filled with beer cans. You would have hated that.

When he finally finds his phone on the bathroom floor, Leon's headache worsens when he sees Chris's name.

"Yeah?"

"Fuck Leon, I was on my way to your house right now. You scared me, man."

"What do you want?" Leon isn't in the mood to talk, especially with Chris.

"Claire told me she went by your house last night, and you weren't there. She says the motorcycle wasn't there. Have you been drinking and driving again?"

Leon rolls his eyes. As if drinking and driving was a big problem for him now.

"Okay, mom, if that is all, then."

"Look," Chris sighs, and there is a long pause before he speaks again. "There is a mission. If you are still interested."

Finally, Leon thinks. He has been begging for one for weeks now, and Chris has always said "no," "next time," or "we shall see" due to his mental health situation.

"Yeah. When?"

"I will send you more details when I have it. Look, Leon, I just don't think you should—"

Leon hangs up without letting Chris finish. He scrolls through his lost calls, mostly all of them being from Chris and Claire. A few from Jill when she was trying to help. It got too much for her as well. Leon scrolls down even longer, finally finding your name.

Almost four months ago. Has it been that long? Two last calls.

As a ritual he repeats every morning, Leon clicks on your name, hearing the call go straight to voice mail. Precisely as he wanted.

Hi, this is Y/N, you tried to reach me, but I can't take your call now! Leave me a voice message, and I will contact you as soon as possible!

Beep.

-x-

 4 months

Jill Valentine is sitting in front of Leon inside the jet. She hasn't looked at him once inside the plane as they are being taken to a contamination site. Her eyes are distant, her form is tense, and Leon maybe thinks that time can't cure it all.

"Preparing to land," They hear in their radio communications. Leon rechecks his gun, wondering without significant interest if any of that would ever end. When he looks up, Jill is observing him.

"You ready for this?" She asks with a mild tone of curiosity in her voice.

You knew Jill longer than you knew Leon, actually. You were her best friend before becoming his lover. Jill had given Leon all the solemn talk of "Don't fuck up with my best friend, or I will kill you." After your passing, Jill had become somewhat like a ghost in his life. She tried, Leon wonders, if not for you, to give him support in the first two weeks, but Leon knew deep down she blamed him.

And she was right.

"Yeah," He answers.

Jill nods. The last time she had seen Leon, he was miserable. With the longest beard Leon has ever had, bloodshot eyes, hair a mess, drunk, and the smell of cigarettes around the house. She told herself she would try for you, but it wasn't easy to see Leon like that. And after she said you would hate it if he smoked inside their house and Leon grunted that you were dead and never coming back, she left without looking twice.

She never understood why Chris and Claire continued. Maybe because they knew him longer than they knew you.

The plane finally lands in a safe space, and they exit. It is in an abandoned industrial area this time, and they might have survivors who live nearby and might need help.

"Do not fuck this up," Jill warns.

"I won't."

-x-

1 month, 1 week, 2 days, and 5 hours

Claire Redfield is knocking on Leon's door. It is way past dinner time, but she brings pizza. From your favorite place. Claire knows he won't have eaten anything since Chris kept telling her Leon is losing weight. Since your death, Claire has tried to help Leon out as much as she could because she knows that is what you would have wanted, to no avail.

"Come on, Leon, I have pizza! I know you haven't eaten today!" She announces.

That's when her sixth sense starts beeping. All house lights are off, which is strange: Leon either left the TV or any light on. Leon didn't like the darkness. Claire tries to open the door but is locked. Leon never locked the door since he was back for this house. With her heart racing, Claire goes to her bag and grabs the reserve key. She shares one with Chris, and they both trade every week. Leon doesn't seem to care, not that he cares about many things lately.

She enters the apartment to complete silence. No sight of him anywhere.

"Leon?" Her voice is distant, as her hands are looking for her gun. Maybe someone invaded and got him? Perhaps something else—?

The air escapes from Claire's lungs when she sees Leon. Hanging from the ceiling.

"Leon!" She screams, running fast to hold his legs. She doesn't know what she is doing, she is calling for help, she is trying to get a chair, she is trying to hold his legs up so he can breathe. Claire doesn't dare to look up.

With one sudden decision, Claire gets her gun and shoots three times at the rope. Leon's body drops, and he is pale as a ghost. She kneels near him, feeling his pulse. There is still one, very light, but there is one.

Without thinking twice, Claire starts CPR, Stayin' Live by Bee Gees, in her head. She knows Leon will hate her for this, but she can't fail this. She would have hated herself, you would have hated her.

"Come on, Leon, come on." She begs desperately as she compresses his chest with all her strength. When Leon finally breathes, a small vigorous one, Claire is sweating on her clothes. She sighs, relieved, sitting down on the floor, drained.

She grabs her bag and finds her phone to call the emergency number, asking for an ambulance. That her friend attempted suicide. She gives them Leon's address, checking for his breathing. When Leon opens his eyes, he is confused. The last thing he remembers is kicking the chair away, the air escaping slowly from his lungs. He looks around, finding Claire's face in his peripheral view. She seems to be crying, her hands on his chest.

His blue eyes find hers, and Leon looks with hatred in her direction for the first time that Claire doesn't recognize him. She feels tears form in the corner of her eyes, and her lips shake, but she holds them back.

"I have called an ambulance," Her voice shakes, and Leon's stare carries so much weight that she must look away.

-x-

1 month, 3 weeks, 8 hours, 2 minutes. 

The hospital door opens, and Leon exits, carrying his duffel bag. After staying confined for almost two weeks, he inhales the fresh air. Those two weeks, instead of helping, just made him feel worse. Much worse. With no alcohol, no cigarettes, nothing, Leon had no way to forget. He woke up and went to sleep with your face on his mind.

Going through what he did wrong. What he could have done right.

He feels the pain sting his soul, thinking about your smile. Fuck, he needed a drink. He needed some sort of dubious mixed-up cocktail. The stronger, the better. When he looks to his left, he sees Chris Redfield standing.

Sighing, he walks toward Chris. Leon knows he won't be able to run away. Chris has a worried stare as he gets closer. To be honest, Leon thought he should have hated after what he did to Claire, but no, Redfield still manages to give him a small smile when Leon gets close.

"Hey."

"Who told you I was going to leave?"

"Mhm, the hospital? You are in my care for the next couple of weeks."

"I am going home." Leon starts to walk away from him, but Chris's arm stops him.

"No, you are not. As I said, you are in my care. And if I need to drag you to my car and make a scene in front of all those people, I will. What do you think?"

Leon hates how Chris can look like you so much regarding his care. Always to drastic measures, you both could say. Pretending to have given up, Leon holds his hands up as a sign of defeat and follows Chris to his car.

"Is...Claire okay?" Leon mutters as Chris starts the car. Leon can see Chris hold the wheel stronger than he should, but the moment passes, and Chris answers.

"She is worried sick about you. She has been...busy, that is all."

Leon knows that is a lie. He had seen Claire on one of the visitations day, and she seemed upset like she had been crying every day since she found him. Leon felt guilty Claire was finding him (he thought someone else would) and was outraged when she saved him. And he ended up lashing out at her. When Claire tried to argue during the visitations that is what you would have wanted, Leon roared that he never wanted to see her again.

To be honest, Leon is relieved. One less person for him to hurt. Chris, well, that one was hard. Leon knows he isn't giving up that easily. Especially after the last thing he said to you was that he would protect him during a mission.

"No, no, Chris, you don't understand, he bikes around without a helmet and thinks that is super cool? I mean, how old is he again? You better keep your eye on him, if I am not around. Got it?" You asked, winking in Leon's direction. He knew you were teasing him, but Chris's tone was serious when he answered.

"Loud and clear."

In the first three weeks after your death, Chris was there. He rummaged through the house, taking everything Leon could use to harm himself. Leon's guns were the first to go, Leon didn't know how he discovered the password, and honestly, he didn't care. He just woke up a day with them gone. Knives? Gone. It was like Chris was baby-proofing the house. 

Leon would have lost much more weight during that time if it wasn't for Chris insisting on him eating. Or hydrate. Warning if he got too weak to take care of himself, Chris would have made sure to strap him to a bed and kept him there against his will.

"There are cigarettes in the glove's compartment," Chris says, cutting his line of thought.

Leon looks at him with suspicion before opening. Chris wasn't lying. There is even a lighter there.

"You smokin' now?" Leon asks out of curiosity.

"No. I bought those for you."

Leon lights up a cigar, opening the window. The rest of the car ride goes silent, and when they finally arrive at Chris's house, he turns off the car, sighing.

"Look, Leon. I am not very good at this, and you know it. You will stay with me as long as you want, but I can't keep you a prisoner in my house."

Leon observes him, and Chris takes the courage to finally say it.

"No one wants you dead, Leon. What happened to Y/N, it wasn't your fault. And you need therapy."

Leon gives a humorless laugh, opening the door of the car.

"You are not bad at this, Chris. You are terrible at this."

-x-

4 months, 1 day, 5 hours

Ada Wong is good at her job. She does what she is paid to do when she needs to do it. No feelings attached, except, well, when Leon Kennedy is involved. It had been like this since the events during Raccoon City.

And then, suddenly, you appeared on his side during the events in Spain. You were something else, for sure. Standing by his side, remaining strong, although that was your first mission, or so Ada heard. And facing up her, determination in your eyes. Ada found you adorable, perfect for Leon. The loyalty, in your eyes, was something she could never demonstrate.

The man in front of her now was just what once was Leon Kennedy, her..."ally" from the other side. Ada had to admit she was shocked when she first saw him, barely recognizing him. Leon had big dark bags under his eyes, not as strong as he once was. And there was...no life in his once vivid blue eyes. Nothing.

"Ada Wong. Doing something for yourself again?" Leon asks, his voice monotone.

Ada was used to his hostility, mistrust, and even anger. But not that complete apathy, a complete lack of emotions. Leon Kennedy was dead, she was confident, and he died when you did.

"You know I don't share my secrets, big boy," She says, her tone the same as always. "But we can always find common ground, as we always do."

Leon nods, and Ada tells herself she shouldn't care, she shouldn't ask. But she has never seen it like this, and this Leon frightens her.

"I have heard about Y/N. My condolences."

Leon's eyes go wide with surprise. He looks at Ada as if she has just arrived from outer space.

"Is this one of your schemes? 'Cause if it is, cut the crap, I am not in the mood."

"It is not. I heard about what happened." Is Ada Wong really showing empathy? Leon blinks, surprised, but he shakes his head. No, it has to be one of her tricks. Since when did Ada start caring about him?

"Shut up, Ada. Do not mention this ever again. We are here for a mission, nothing else, nothing more. Stop pretending you fucking care." Leon's voice is low, and Ada doesn't say anything as she watches him walk in the dark corridor before her. She has known him long enough to know when he is being serious, and she knows he is threatening her life now.

Ada sighs. The Leon Kennedy she once knew, was gone. You left a carcass behind, a damaged man for the rest of his life. Ada still remembers the last thing she said to you, before she disappeared.

"You are truly special. Take care of him."

-x-

1 minute

"Is Mr. Leon Kennedy speaking?"

Leon stops when he answers his phone to a strange voice. 

"Yes? Who is this?"

"Mr. Kennedy, this is from McKenney Hospital. Could we speak with you in just a moment? Are you busy or driving?"

"No. Hospital, you say? What is going on?"

"We just need a moment of your time. Do you know Y/N L/N?"

Leon's heart starts bumping against his chest.

"Yes. What about it?"

"Y/N L/N was involved in a car crash today, sir. At this moment in time, they are doing surgery on them."

"What? No, excuse me, ma'am, this is some mistake."

The gentle voice behind the phone silences as she listens, Leon saying you weren't involved in an accident. It was impossible. You were coming to have dinner with him later, you were going to forgive him, you were going to be back together just fine. When Leon shuts up, the voice speaks again with much more compassion.

"You are tagged as their emergency contact, Mr. Kennedy. How long can you get in here—"

"I just fucking told you, lady, that is impossible, they are coming to have dinner with me, we are supposed to reconnect, and you aren't listening to me!" Leon screams the last part, punching the counter before him and making all the glass bowls in the counter jump. 

The compassionate voice waits to speak again in a much more determined tone.

"Mr. Kennedy, I suggest you come to the hospital, not alone. Come with a friend. We will answer all your questions and concerns when you get here. Just don't come alone."

Leon turns off the call, pissed. How can the lady be so stupid? He told her over and over again you were on your way to his house, your house. Leon had been cooking the whole night, preparing your favorite dinner. After that, he would never let you away from him ever again. He breathes deeply now, trying to ease the tremors on his hands, when he lets his eyes wander off to the TV, a news broadcast about a terrible accident that happened. Some drunk driver caused this accident that involved a with a truck oil tank, and five people were killed. Many injuries reported.

Without thinking twice, Leon grabs his motorcycle's keys.

He doesn't know how he got in one piece in the hospital. Something inside him tells him to call Jill, Claire, Chris, or someone, anyone, but he doesn't. The hospital's entrance is chaotic, with most victims being taken there since it was the closest location.

Leon asks your name to the front receptionist, and they say they are operating you now. The lady points to the waiting room area, where Leon waits. Leon had felt fear many times in his life, but nothing compared to this. He knew you were strong. Stronger than him, actually. You were brave. You were getting out of this.

Because he didn't know how to live without you.

Leon observed families getting good and bad news for what seemed an eternity. The death toll climbed to more two people, a mom crumble in the doctor's arms due to the loss of his son and husband. Leon was praying, begging for some higher force or anything for you to live.

He would never drink again. Leon Kennedy would never let the darkness inside him win and let you go. He would never doubt himself or his ability to love. No, Leon would love you even more intensely than he already did, more than anything in his life.

Leon takes a while to get up when the doctor finally calls his name. He feels sick, his stomach is twisting. He counts nine steps until he gets to the doctor, a lady with scrubs and an indecipherable face.  

"Mr. Kennedy, do you want me to take you to a more private room?"

"Tell me."

The doctor sighs, looking directly into his eyes when she says. 

"We did everything we could, Mr. Kennedy. I am sorry they didn't make it."

No. 

"I am sorry, Mr. Kennedy, I truly am."

No. NO! NO!

"Mr. Kennedy, please, don't, I am sorry. Can I get some help over here? Please, don't do this!"

It takes six or seven security guards to stop Leon from destroying the waiting room or even hurting someone. He is crying, he is begging, he is losing himself. It couldn't be true. It just couldn't. It was unfair: not after everything he had done or everything you went through together. He always told you he needed to die first because Leon knew damn well he couldn't live without you. Leon has a hole in his chest that will never close again. He feels someone pull his sleeve up, a pinching sensation, and Leon falls into darkness. 

[terribleinfluence-tour]

I will phrase this nicer than i did in my own blog, but please if some of you could be a little more patient with us around finding preshows and the quality of them.

The preshow i reblogged early was the first one i found when i woke up this morning and i didn’t listen to it i just posted it. I’m very sorry that the audio quality wasn’t up to standard HOWEVER this blog is an archive of all things tit related, that means we are archiving everything including ‘bad audios’ because it serves as part of the tours legacy.

I am forever grateful to anyone who has recorded any audio of the show and preshow and any videos of the preshow, and i think some of you should be grateful too because the people doing this don’t have to but they do!

I just want to give you guys an idea of my day during tour so you can understand why I can’t always post the best audio or a film video first thing in the day.

I work 40 hours a week, I am not currently in the right timezone, most of the things happening with tit right now are while i’m sleeping.

I currently wake up at 8am, i have a quick look through tumblr and twitter and i post whatever i find, i have 30 minutes to get ready for work in the morning and i genuinely spend 15 of that on this blog. I then go to work. sometimes throughout the day I will check to see if anything new has appeared (there’s normally about 2 audios and a video by then) I take a quick break from my job to post those and then i go back to work. When i finish work i check twitter and tumblr again and then I go through m&gs and i screenshot them all and post them, this takes a few hours. (sometimes peyton will do this and that’s very helpful) I then go to sleep and the cycle starts again.

Running this blog is literally a second job. It’s hard work and it takes up a lot of my time, the blog is nowhere near even at its potential yet, i have so many pages etc planned that i barely have time for.

I am trying my best, i love updating this blog and I am so committed to it. All i ask in return is a little patience and a little less condescension from some people.

I love you all!

Bethanie

[svkahug]

once more to see you

[chapter three; ao3 link]

tags: slow burn, injury, forced proximity, quarry!reader, hurt/comfort

summary: On the run with the Empire on your heels, a bounty hunter seems to be your only option and your best bet to getting back home.

a/n: heard someone say tumblr has no fluff well i shall provide

---

Space is so… quiet . So empty. Sometimes there’s not another breathing creature for miles. Then you hit a planet. You’ve tallied all the planets you’ve been on recently as the Mandalorian goes on the search, relentless. Yavin, Geonosis, Lothal. Desolate and lifeless planets. But you never see them. The Mandalorian isn’t exactly a tour guide but he does talk to you more often as you strap yourself onto the co-pilot seat beside him. Him and the kid are gone for days at a time, no longer than a week. 

You eat, you sleep, you dream. You’ve snooped around every nook and cranny of the Razor Crest. It’s not as if he’s going to pop out of nowhere and chastise you. You can probably traverse this ship from memory alone. 

You find what you assume is his bed. But you don’t sleep in it. Not even on the days where he’s gone. It’s just as small and cramped as the ship and you simply can’t believe anyone even uses that thing. 

The worry that he might have perished out there crosses your mind. But you couldn’t let it get to you. He uses the ship's emergency comms to check in at night. Sometimes he doesn’t.  

You shuffle through the supplies, you use the fresher, you stare outside the windows of the cockpit then you sleep on the floor. Until on the nights that you don’t. You think it started when they left for Lothal. They were gone for four days and you barely slept a wink.

It was the nightmares, you think. Twisted and vile things that were a manifestation of your fears. 

You don’t like to think about it. When your ship crashed on Jakku. You lost people. Guardsmen that've been with you since childhood. People died violent deaths to protect you. 

The memories come in flashes, unwanted and painful. They chased you through that rocky and desolate planet. The Empire rained hell. You ought to be flattered seeing as how they would go through all this trouble for you. If not for the night terrors you had of being back in that rubble, of seeing people drop dead like flies, and smelling the stench of gasoline from their flamethrowers. 

You wake up, heaving and choking back sobs, the heat of the flame feeling too real and too close. On the good nights, you’re able to talk to the Mandalorian through the emergency comm on the console of the ship. 

You’re mulling around the cockpit, memorizing the console controls, wondering what each one does when a soft crackle gets your attention. You’re so used to the quiet that the soft sound causes you to perk up immediately. 

“Mando?”

“— Hello ?”

“Took you long enough.” 

“ How’s the ship?”

You look at the blinking communicator as if it’s done you some personal offense. “...I’m fine, thank you very much. Ship’s intact, at least. Old thing.”

“... And you?”

“Are you asking if I’m still intact? Because the answer is no. I’ve lost my mind. I think I can hear colors.”

“ Yeah, isolation will do that to you .”

“What about you? Any sign of her?”

“... No. I'm in a village. No one’s seen anyone matching her description. Fob’s no help either. ” 

“Oh.” It’s nearly been two weeks. Four planets and more parsecs than you can count. “A village?”

“ Yes. Almost a day’s trek from the ship, so I’ll be back there by tomorrow. ”

You hesitate. “Can you stay? Just for a bit?”

“ Have you been sleeping? ”

“Not really.” 

“...I can keep the line open for a bit. Try to rest. ”

—

Two weeks later.

Batuu was green. That was the first thing you noticed. As the ship geared closer to the surface you see that those are actually trees, densely packed together to form a jungle. 

The ramp lowers and you can’t help it, you stand on the mouth of the ship, admiring the life of the planet. They’re gigantic, with bark twice the usual size and vines hanging from their branches, unlike what you had back at home.

The Mandalorian falls into step beside you and you can already sense what he’s about to say so you beat him to it.

“I’m just going to look.” The crest is parked in a clearing in the middle of the forest, flattening the long grass. It smells like damp soil and you can hear birds cawing in the distance. Surprisingly, he doesn’t stop you as you slowly walk down the ramp, grateful for the fresh air. “It’s beautiful.”

“It’s ancient.” He counters, his boots crunching on the ground as he flanks you. “These trees have been here for a thousand years. They’re sacred.”

You turn to him. “Don’t you think I should—”

“ No .” He says firmly. 

“She’s trained. Been in military command for as long as I can remember. She can outsmart you and she can fight….She wouldn’t run if she saw me.”

“Believe me, I can handle it. If she’s even here. I’m not risking you for an intel that could be weeks old.” He says, wading through a field of long grass, the little kid hovering nearby. 

“You’re no use to me dead.”

You make a face, smiling sarcastically. “ Charmed .”

“You’re welcome.” He deadpans. “Now get back on the ship.” 

—

There’s a storm outside when the Mandalorian comes back two days later.  You’ve fallen asleep to the sound of the smattering of rain on the roof of the ship when there’s a loud clang outside and you shoot up almost immediately.  

Suddenly, the ramp creaks awake as it opens, letting the water in. The sound of the rain is deafening now and you’re barely up on your feet before the Mandalorian sprints inside the vessel, the child’s pram zooming shortly behind him. He makes his way up into the cockpit immediately, firing up the engine before you can even hear the ramp shut below. Another crash comes from outside, and what sounded like an animal growling and clawing on the ground. Panic rises inside you as you stumble into the cockpit. 

“ What is that —?”

“Strap in now . We’re leaving.”

You do as you're told. “Did you find her?”

“No.” The ship lifts off the ground, and there’s something clanging on the side of the ship now. 

“ Who is that? ” They found us, you think. They fucking found us. 

“Bandits.”

“Wh– Seriously ?“

You’re in hyperspace when you finally notice it. You couldn’t help the gasp that escapes you, “ Holyfuckingshit , Mando—”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.” He says, voice a little more ragged than usual, as if he didn’t have a knife sticking out of his fucking back.

You shoot up from your seat. “Shit , what— what do we do ? Holy —fuck .” It all comes out in a tumble. He’s facing you now but you can still see the knife sticking out of him. It’s really fucking huge. Especially because it’s halfway stuck inside him.

“Wait, wait here.” You’re practically flying through the ship when you come back with the kit, ripping it open on the floor of the cockpit and rummaging through its contents. “Here, what do you need?”

“The cauterizer.” His voice sounds thinner, even through the modulator, and it only adds a layer of panic to your already worsening state. “Look for the cauterizer— That— Yeah that one. Good.” You hand it to him. “You’re doing good. Now, you’re going to take it out—”

“What? No way .” You step back.

“Listen–”

“I don’t know how to — ”

“Hey, hey, breathe .” He grasps both your hands in his. His gloves are damp, and you see the droplets of water on his armor, his chrome visor staring up at you. “Calm down. It’s going to be alright. As long as I don’t bleed out, it’s fine.” 

“You’re kidding me right? How is that fine ?”

“Trust me, I’ve had worse.”

Trust him? That’s literally something the two of you couldn’t get right for nearly a month now. Now he’s basically putting his life in your hands and asking you to— Fuck . “Fuck, fine. I—I’ll do it.”

“Okay, you’re going to take out the dagger. Then you’re going to cauterize the wound with this.” He flicks some sort of switch and it fucking zaps . He places it in your hands. “Are you ready? You’re going to have to be quick, alright?”

He makes quick work of his chestplate, the armor clanging on the ground just as you come back with the scissors, ripping violently through his undershirt. You don’t think, you just do it and to your horror and surprise, the blade comes out easier than you expected. He lets out a long and loud groan, doubling over and gripping the console just as the bloody weapon joins the rest of his armor on the ground. You place a hand on his back to steady him, his skin warm.

“Maker, I’m sorry.” You say sincerely, gripping the cauterizer in one hand and steadying him with the other. He barks out a shout just as the laser makes contact with his skin. “ Stars , I’m sorry. Sorry, sorry… I’msosorry .” Your apologies turn into a whisper under your breath like a mantra, staying laser focused on the task at hand as he makes pained, broken noises underneath you. His fisted hand comes down onto the edge of the console.

It’s done eventually. The process felt longer than it was and there’s a moment when all you can hear is his heavy breathing mingling with the peaceful hum of hyperspace. It’s a juxtaposition of sounds. You couldn’t possibly imagine the pain he’s in and all he’s got to show for it now is a fresh jagged scar on the back of his shoulder.

You want to sit, but before you can even move an inch, he beats you to it. Suddenly, he’s tipping forward, a little too much and you recognize the fact that he’s going limp. You move just in time to catch him, letting your entire body support his weight as his helmet digs into your stomach while you try to get him back up into the chair without hurting his freshly closed wound. You hear garbling coming from underneath the armor. 

“It’s okay,” you murmur, hands on his pauldrons to support him, smearing red all over the metal. “It—It’s okay, I have you.” Literally. You don’t see any other option on how to move an injured man twice your size without hurting him right now and you’re too tired to think of a solution. So, you let him rest like that; his head on your stomach. 

You take a deep breath, your dominant hand cramping and your limbs feeling like you just strapped weights on them. You’re also getting colder and colder as the water he brought in earlier mingles with your sweat. Your hands are bloody. He makes another pained sound, a gloved hand coming up to grip your hip. 

“You ok?” You whisper. 

“ Mhm .”

“...Th—That wasn’t them, right?”

“No, it wasn’t.” Relief washes over you and you hardly feel his thumb brush a circle on your hip. 

You stay like that for longer than a moment. At some point, he’s placed his elbow on his knees to relieve some of the weight on you, still keeping his hand on your waist to steady you as you whizz through hyperspace. 

You let out a sigh, trying to focus on anything but how uncomfortable you are. 

It dawns on you you’ve never been this close before and you’ve never touched him, let alone seen his skin. It’s the first time you see him underneath all that metal. 

Suddenly, to you, there’s a lot of him. Weeks of looking at him and seeing nothing but metal and now the large expanse of his back is exposed to the cool air where you cut through his shirt. He’s a little pale from the injury and you also think it’s something to do with not being exposed to the sun that much. Your fingers grip his bare shoulder as you push him up just enough to make sure he doesn’t slip. His skin is damp, and he vaguely smells of rain, and something earthy. He’s a man underneath that armor, you almost forgot.

You watch the steady rise and fall of his torso as his lungs expand, muscles contracting as he tries to take in more air, and you notice the moles on his back. Tiny and completely unnoticeable marks scattered on the expanse of skin unless you stare really hard. You wonder if he knows this. Without thinking, you drag a clean hand, from his pauldron, to the small spot on his back, tracing it. Then to the next, and next, careful of his bad shoulder. It seemed like something you should do naturally and with no hesitation. You’re completely out of it, then, gently running your fingers along his back in a trancelike state, like your action and him feeling anything were two completely separate things. You hear him release a breath underneath you but you don’t feel the shudder that runs up his spine. You don’t see him shut his eyes underneath the helmet, don’t notice him lean back into your touch. Mando tries not to feel the throbbing pain on his shoulder, instead he focuses on the feel of your hand against his skin. He wonders if you were doing it on purpose. Or if you were in shock.

“Are you okay?” comes his question. He sounds more full now. Like he’s back to his usual self.

“Yeah,” you breathe, hand stopping in the middle of his back like you just traced a map and finally settled on a location.

You feel a squeeze on your hip, his head resurfacing from where it rested on your stomach and you’re suddenly faced with the chrome visor of his helmet.

“I’m fine. The kid’s fine. It’s over.” He says, sensing your distress. You nod silently. You can see him, and your reflection on his helmet but you can’t really… see it. Everything feels so cloudy and far away. You don’t want to look at the blood staining your hands, on his back. 

After dropping out of hyperspace, you lock yourself in the fresher and don’t come out half an hour later.

—

You assumed he was passed out from where he sat on the floor of the hull, resting, when you got out of the fresher until he said something. “We’re going back to Nevarro.”

“What for?” you whisper, meticulously laying out a fresh set of blankets on the floor. You were trying not to think much about anything right now. The baby is asleep, the hull is dark and silent, save for your whispers.

“I’m meeting with my employer, and we need supplies.” He’s changed out of his damp clothes now, and didn’t bother with putting the beskar back on yet.

You frown, listening to his attempt to get up. “You’re going to work for him?”

“Yes. I’m not made of credits.” You could argue that, technically, he was. But you feel like that would have been borderline offensive. He finds himself expecting you to say something back, but you’re quiet. He at least expected you to fight him on this, like you usually do. 

“Hey.” Comes the modulated tone of his voice, sounding hesitant. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine.” You chuck your damp clothes in the corner, not meeting his eyes—or rather, the chrome visor now staring in your direction.

“I think you’re in shock.” He takes hold of your elbow as you make your way across the other end of the hull. “Talk to me.”

You stop in your tracks, feeling oddly vulnerable in your state. “...You just scared me.” You state plainly and just when the words leave your mouth that’s when you’re able to pinpoint what it is you’ve been feeling all alone. Fear. An image flashed through your mind—limp bodies on the ground, eyes wide open but so empty and lifeless. The memories rears its ugly head at you tonight, resurfacing faster than you can help it. 

“ Maker —” You breathe out a puff of air, pressing the palm of your hand to your eyes until you can see stars. “I—I don’t want to do that again. Please don’t—don’t make me do that again. I—I don’t know why I’m—I mean, shit, you were the one with th—the knife in your back.” 

The Mandalorian’s hand drifts down from your elbow to grip your hand in a gloved hand, his filtered voice surprisingly really soft. “I think you’re just tired…. It’s alright.”

A wet sob fights its way out of you. Stars, it’s pathetic. It’s so fucking embarrassing . 

You wipe away your tears angrily with your free hand, a lump forming in your throat as you try to stifle a sob. You just stand there, frustratingly wiping away your tears as they come, sobbing quietly into the palm of your hands. It’s all really caught up to you now. How much the past few weeks—hell, months —really fucked you up. He was right. You were tired. You wanted to go home. You wanted to grieve . 

You suspect he might just leave you there, tell you to at least get some rest before going back up the cockpit to maneuver the ship to Nevarro but he doesn’t. 

The hand that’s holding yours starts to tug you closer, hesitantly and you go willingly, still wiping tears until you’re close enough to wrap your arms around him and bury your face into his good shoulder, letting him soak up your fresh tears. He’s warm without the beskar, and you practically melt into him.

“You haven’t been sleeping?” You shook your head against the soft cloth of his black undershirt running down to cover his arms, now wrapping securely around you, albeit awkwardly like he really didn’t know what to do and was simply improvising. “...It’s okay.” He runs his hand across your back soothingly and you hum softly against his shoulder.

A part of you is surprised at the gentleness in which he handles you, something you only ever see him reserve for the kid, but you can’t bring yourself to pull away. While he never showed any ill intentions towards you, you could never really read him. This was a job. You were a job to him. And he never failed to treat you as such. The things he did, you always assumed, was to benefit him and the kid. Your protection was just a byproduct.  You had no qualms about it, but months on the run, weeks alone, and the uncertainty of it all was getting to you, you admit and you just needed… you needed someone that wasn’t hunting you down or trying to kill you. 

You stay like that until your sobs subside and you’re taking calming breaths against him, his hand lingering . It was nice. This was nice. You turn your face into the crook of his neck, where there’s a spot where a patch of skin is showing. You find yourself wondering what he looked like all of a sudden

Suddenly, a soft cry pierces the silence of the ship and you’re suddenly reminded about where you were.

Slowly, you part. “I’ll get him,” you say with a nod. 

That night, you fall into a peaceful, dreamless sleep.

[sixstepsaway]

I do not think that Ed is supposed to be abusive? i'm pretty sure we are meant to understand that he's acting this way because he's scared and threatened? The headbutting was rude but one isolated incident of headbutting in an extreme situation (waking up from a coma caused by a suicide attempt! his brain was all fucked up!) does not equal abuse. Where are you getting all this? Also I thought we were supposed to tag things with "[character] critical" around here.

Anon, I want you to understand that I say this as someone who has always loved Ed, and as someone who is approaching your message with the belief you are being completely genuine: Ed not being deliberately penned as abusive is almost the entire problem.

We literally see this cycle happening on screen in the first two episodes. After an outburst of violence where he destroys some innocent sod's wedding (2), he asks after the crew and checks they had enough cake (3), and says they're welcome to rhino horn, he's snappy but there's no violence (4) and things seem fine, up until when Izzy comes in later and says the crew don't want to part with their treasure. Ed starts to get angry (1) and Izzy desperately tries to convey that they love him and want him to be okay, and that he's just concerned for him and the crew, but he misspeaks, he says something Ed doesn't like, so Ed storms upstairs and starts pointing guns at people (2) until Izzy deliberately triggers him into shooting him not the rest of the crew.

Ed tells them to handle Izzy, goes to bed. When Frenchie encounters him the next day, he's bright, he's cheerful, it's like nothing ever happened (3) except that Frenchie knows it did. Frenchie is terrified because he knows what's coming, but Ed is calm (4) and things are just fine, because Frenchie is agreeing with him and telling him what he wants to hear. Ed catches him later and starts getting cold and angry, scaring him (1). Frenchie knows what's coming, and he's terrified.

Luckily for Frenchie, Ed takes his anger out on Izzy again (2) by taking a gun down there, but arguably you can say he takes it out on all of them by trying to sink the ship.

If Ed was just being a scary motherfucker, that would be one thing, but the show was very deliberately showing the power imbalance. If Ed had wanted to kill Frenchie right then and there, who would have stopped him? Who could have?

The show wrote and showed a cycle of abuse and that is okay, what isn't great is that they then went "¯\_(ツ)_/¯ meh!" and pretended like that cycle never happened or would only apply to Izzy, the latter of which is visibly and patently not true anyway because it gets applied to the whole crew multiple times.

I would have no issue with this, or with where the show took Ed, if the show actually took the time to get him there, but all they really did was teleport him from point A (abusing everyone around him) to point J (already redeemed, done the work, much better now) in the time it took him to catch a bloody fish

And the point of the headbutt is him saying, "I wanted it to hurt!" is fine in isolation but not super great when held up against the cycle I've just been talking about, or against Stede flinching from his violence.

And as for "edward teach critical" or whatever, I saw ofmd critical so I used that, I did not know the other tag existed. I haven't been on Tumblr much and the culture changes. Plus, I was criticizing OFMD as a whole, not just Ed, who I feel was treated horribly in s2.

[thefallennightmare]

Just Pretend-thirteen

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader

Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse.

Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.

Authors Note: Okay, it's all fixed now! Sorry about the confusion. ENJOY!

Collaborating With: @thescarlettvvitch(better give her all the love as well)

Tags: @thescarlettvvitch @ozwriterchick @waake-meee-up @notingridslurkaccount @niicoleleigh @sammyjoeee @xxrainstorm @dominuslunae @notmaddihealy @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @iknownothingpeople @writethrough @thebadchic @blackveilomens Claudia on Tumblr @tobe-written @blacksoul-27 @loeytuan98 @loverofagoodbeard @comfortcharactercraze @lma1986 @plutonikchaos1 @spicywhenspeaking @lyschko666 @somewhere-diamond @hi-fancy-seeing-you-here @koskeepsake @bngurngheart

READER

The sun’s warms rays blasted through the large window and warmed my back as I snuggled deeper into the bed, holding the sheet closer to my bare chest. A familiar scent filled my senses while a familiar heartbeat pounded against my cheek as I slowly woke, realizing I was lying on a chest. A tattoo of flowers and a portrait of a skeleton and women were the first thing I saw once the sleep haze faded. The chest rose and fell with each deep breath it took. Arms wrapped around me, keeping me locked in place; those arms were lanky but building muscle, slowly but surely.

I looked up at his sleeping face, feeling calm and settled for the first time in a very long time.

Opening one eye, he grinned then pulled me in closer to leave soft, pepper like kisses across my forehead, cheeks, nose, and lastly lips; my giggles echoing throughout my bedroom. The thin sheet laid loosely around our naked, tangled forms, and he hooked my leg over his waist.

“This was the only thing I wanted to wake up to.” He said, his voice deep and husky with sleep.

“I’m glad you stayed till morning, Noah.” I breathed across his lips as I propped myself up to kiss him. I

He brushed away my sleep tousled hair to hook his fingers behind my neck, closing the distance.

My eyes snapped open as my phone rang loudly, my seven a.m alarm shocking me to my bones, and I rolled over in the empty side of the bed to silence it. I groaned into the pillow, wanting so desperately to slip back into the dream. It felt so real to have Noah in bed with me, his bare skin against mine. It brought back memories of our night together in that hotel room and my pussy clenched with the need to feel that same release.

Ignoring it, I checked my phone, like I did every morning, and sucked in a breath when I saw a new text from Noah; mind immediately going back to the dream. After our workout, we went our separate ways, and I was busy last night with my art class and writing that I never realized he texted me around eleven in the evening last night.

“Oh, shit,” I sat up straight in bed when the new selfie stared back at me.

It was nice seeing you again, angel. I had fun tonight.

I analyzed the fuck out of that picture. His hair was messy, pouty lips, and his dark hooded eyes gazed down at me. His cheeks were flushed with a red hue and it could have been my already aroused state, but I knew what he did before sending this picture. It was clear.

“Fuck it,” I sighed while tossing my phone on the other end of the bed to lean over the side of it, pulling out the small box underneath my bed.

I rummaged through a variety of different toys until eventually deciding on my favorite. Double checking to make sure the door was closed, I shimmed out of my shorts and panties to lay straight back on the bed. My breathing was labored as my heart raced with the image of Noah’s selfie and my dream. All of my senses were heightened as I pressed the pink vibrator against my clit, the vibrations sending shockwaves throughout my entire body.

I shut my eyes and worked; I saw Noah so clearly as I continued to let my mind wander. I kept shifting back to that night we shared, but also to something new. I fantasized Noah was in bed with me again.

“Turn over” he commands, moving out the way to give me space.

I do, quickly, and Noah reached down to pull the sheet completely off me, watching me with starving eyes the whole time. He hovered over me as he pushed my legs apart to lean down and kiss between my breasts, and slowly makes his way down. As I continued to fantasize, all I could see was him, and my vibrator was going off in different speeds; I imagined I might just die then and there.

I see him smile, it almost feels so real-too real-into my thigh, and he looks up to me through lashes.

“Say it.” he demanded.

“Say what?” My voice was wrecked, breathless, as my orgasm built low in my belly.

Noah’s teeth grazed the inside of my thigh. “Say it angel, say what you want from me.”

“I want you to make me cum. Please, I need it.”

A soft kiss to the inside of my thigh, across the tattoo of the Greek Gods. “Always, angel.”

Noah grinned, his eyes locking with mine as he kept contact, tilting his head down and licking my clit softly.

Some ungodly noise came out of me as continued to see him. My brain was so fuzzy, the vibrator must have been going off for atleast 10 minutes, I couldn’t stop. I saw his inches of hair, I could almost feel it tickle my thighs and could feel the warm heat of his mouth licking, sucking, biting.

“Oh, fuck Noah!” I puffed out. I didn’t mean to say it so vocally.

Fuck, Malcolm and Chase; if they were awake, they probably heard. But I didn’t care, I was so close. My knees shook and back arched up off the bed as my mouth fell open.

I took my free hand and scrunched it into a fist, almost like I was grasping his imaginary hair. I imagined him looking up at me, mouth over my clit with dark brown eyes gazing up at me. Rings over his fingers as his hand pressed down on my stomach to keep me in place. That sight did it for me just at the right time my vibrator send me tipping over the edge.

“Noah. Noah. NOAH!” I yelled while running a hand over my face, to bit into my palm.

Realizing how overstimulated I was, I noticed I came all over my sheets.

“Holy shit,” I breathed. “Whatever this is, it has to be chemicals that make me cling to you.”

Twenty minutes later, I cleaned myself up and dressed in another pair of lounge day clothes before stalking down the long hallway towards the living room where Chase and Malcolm were nursing their coffees.

“Do you guys want to hear this song I’ve been working on?” I asked while walking over to the attached kitchen to pour myself some coffee.

Malcolm smirked. “I think we already did.”

I raised a brow. “How? I just came up with it.”

“Noah, Noah, Noah,” Chase mocked with a high-pitched voice.

The blood drained from my face as I stared at them, mouth agape. I didn’t think I was that loud.

Right?

“Fuck you,” I pushed his shoulder as I stood behind the couch.

Chase ignored me and continued to mock Noah’s name in my voice.

“Right there, yes Noah!” Malcolm teased now.

“SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!” I grabbed a pillow off the couch and smacked both of them behind their heads.

READER

Sitting on my bed with my laptop perched on my lap, my fingers worked hastily as they typed away the new song that kept replaying in my mind.

I know it's chemicals that make me cling to you And I need a miracle to get away from you I know it's chemicals and I need a miracle And I'm not spiritual But please stay 'Cause I think you're a saint and I think you're an angel.

I was so engrossed in the writing aspect that I almost didn’t realize the buzzing from my phone right next to me.

2:30.

“Shit,” I cursed while setting my laptop aside so I could answer my phone, my heart hammering hard in my chest.

It happened every day knowing what I was about to see.

Noah’s bright smile came through the screen before the richness of his voice danced on my ears.

“Hi,” he greeted.

“Hey yourself,” I smirked when I realized he was shirtless. “Noah, you realize it’s on 45 degrees outside, right? Why aren’t you wearing a shirt?”

He taped a thumb over his chest while raising a brow at me. “My body runs hot so I’m more comfortable without a shirt. Does it bother you?”

Quite the opposite, actually.

The suggestive tone in his voice told me everything I needed to know about his motives. With the selfie he sent me last night and now this? Noah wanted to tease me, well two can play at that game.

“I understand that. Malcolm has the heat set to 72 and I’m dying,” I sighed while unzipping my sweater, tossing it onto the floor.

The strap of my tank top slid down my shoulder, exposing the skin of my collarbone, and I saw the way Noah’s eyes darkened, tongue darting out to wet his lips. Even through the phone, the tension was thick and when I thought back to what happened this morning, my skin set ablaze.

I cleared my throat. “So, uh. How’s your day been?”

“Good,” Noah shifted on his bed, most likely to get comfortable. “I just got back from the studio a bit ago. Might take a nap or stream. I haven’t decided yet.”

I pulled a pillow from behind me to lie down on my stomach, propping myself up on it. “How’s it going? The writing?”

The corner of his lips curled up. “Really good. How about you?”

I turned my phone towards my laptop briefly before setting it back to my face. “My mind is all over the place. I think I’m writing three different songs at once.”

Noah chuckled before a serious expression crossed his features. “How have you been, really? I know the last few months haven’t been easy for either of us, and I just-I just want to make sure you’re good, that, we’re good.”

“Can I be honest?” I bit my lip.

“With me, angel? Always.”

I let out a deep, steady breath, ready to fill Noah in on a part of me; one that I was worried for him to find out.

“I didn’t do well for a little. I was in a really dark place that Chase and Malcolm were afraid they wouldn’t be able to pull me out of. I kept playing Eiley on repeat.”

Noah stiffened. “I had Sympathy on repeat.”

“You did?” I asked with scrunched brows.

“Yeah. I even talked with Keaton. He-uh-gave me a great sign.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat, not wanting to tell him that Keaton gave me a sign as well.

“Being able to talk to you, to see you, has lifted a huge weight off My shoulders, I didn’t realize how hard it would be to not even send you a dumb meme. I’m-.” I stammered over my next few words. “I’m glad we’ve been able to start over. That means so much.”

I could have gone on and on, but was too afraid. I didn’t want him to jump to conclusions and didn’t want him to know why I was holding back; not yet atleast. I needed his hand on my shoulder atleast for now, until from what the dark side of my mind believed, Noah would pull away. I couldn’t risk losing him.

Not again.

“Well, I’m happy to agree with you. Things haven’t been easy for me, typically I would turn heel. But having you in my life makes me at ease. So I’m glad too. It means a lot to me, as well.”

We gazed at each other with our own dopey smiles for what felt like hours but in reality, was less than a minute until Noah cleared his throat while scratching his face.

“Do you want to meet up for brunch Tuesday? Bottomless mimosas?”

My heart fluttered at the excitement in his voice.

“Sounds great,” I smiled but then cursed. “Shit. Tuesday? Ah, I can’t, I have an appointment that day. Rain check? Cause we need to get mimosas. The orange juice Malcom’s been buying lately isn’t my standard.”

“Of course, anytime.”

Noah wanted to ask about the appointment, I saw it all over his face. He didn’t-he respected my boundaries.

“I like our little 2:30 pm routine,” I admitted.

“Me too, angel, me too,” his eyes sparkled.

READER

“Thank you for telling me your story, Y/N. I imagine it’s a lot to process within a short amount of time. Now that it’s laid out in front of us today, how does it make you feel? Are you sad?”

I stared at the women sitting across from me, my knee bouncing with anticipation? Nerves? I wasn’t sure. I had been rambling on the last ten minutes and wanted her to give me an inclination about how she was feeling.

“I’m not sad. Not like I was mere weeks ago.” I explained to her, “But, somehow I can’t help crying. Although things happened quickly, I can’t help but continue to feel guilt yet also ambivalent.”

The therapist, Dr. Poulos, sat straighter in her chair. “Okay. Let’s dig a little deeper. You chose the word ambivalence. That suggests strong feelings-in opposition.”

I played with the rings on my fingers, keeping my gaze on anything but her face. “I’m not good enough for him or anyone else and there’s a lot of weight I carry for that. Trey explained that to me enough, not to mention the other traumas I probably have hidden within me. I have guilt.”

“Why do you feel guilty? Why would it warrant guilt? You said yourself he forgave you, quickly at that. Does that concern you? Do you still feel as if you can’t be honest with him or honest with yourself?”

Fuck, she kept pounding out those questions.

I paused and stared at the plant she had on the left side of her dresser. A bit fuzzy because of the connection between phone lines.

“Y/N,” her voice snapped me out of my deep thoughts.

I sighed and began. “When I first got my diagnosis, it didn’t sound serious, but after a while it became more ominous than other people’s. I imagined my character as desolate as a shirt that had been manufactured incorrectly and was therefore useless.”

She tilted her head and smiled at me, gently. “You’re valid for feeling those things, it’s easy to look at your flaws and say, alright, this isn’t worth the trouble. It’s easy to believe you’re incapable of getting the love you deserve. However, I think deep down you don’t trust yourself, as much as you don’t trust anyone else. I think you’ve been running with nowhere to go.”

She got me there.

I didn’t appreciate the call out effect although I suppose I needed to hear it. But that didn’t stop me from getting defensive.

“Running from what?” I wondered while crossing one leg over the other.

“Running from a love you believe you don’t deserve, seems like Noah hasn’t done anything to misplace your trust in him.”

“Thanks, I already know that- just make me feel worse, I guess.” I shrugged.

“Y/n it’s not about feeling worse, it’s about the fact you’re a runner. You sabotaged the things you love the most. Camouflaging being self composed.”

I was numb in the chest; I wanted to close the blinds. I felt like it split me into so many parts. It was never my intention to run from him, I just couldn’t drag him down. Due to my continuation of silence Dr. Poulos kept talking.

“I’m going to be completely honest with the way I perceive everything.”

I snorted. “You haven’t already?”

“You go on the road one more time and leave your flaws at home. If you go into this relationship, you don’t leave the trauma from the other behind. You don’t communicate properly due to fear. It seems like Noah stopped you dead in your tracks, he’s a mirror almost, he sees you from the inside and that scares the hell out of you doesn’t it?”

I stopped her right then. “I wouldn’t say that, I just don’t want to hurt him more than I have or myself.”

I was stubborn as a mule. I wasn’t admitting shit. However, it seemed like Dr. Poulos already knew.

“That’s understandable, Y/N. However, I would say that just your mannerisms alone tell me you’re harboring such deep feelings but not allowing yourself to feel them due to fear of rejection, unhappiness-.”

With her hesitation, I felt uncomfortable yet also strangely calm. It felt like my guts were being ripped open and placed in front of me. Forcing me to look at them first hand.

“I think you need a rest.”

“Okay, I’ll go home and take a nap,” I retorted with a smart smirk.

“No no,” she chuckled. “A genuine rest! The bans are better with going out of the country right now. I think it would be good for you to go see your father. Talk to him, get another perspective. A father is a daughter’s first introduction to the shadow of men, and it seems like you have a good relationship. Communicate with him, enjoy yourself for a little while. When you come home, we’ll reevaluate things and see how you feel from there.”

I had to admit, going to see my dad had been on my mind heavily the last few weeks. I truly missed him and felt that some time away from everything would help ease the dark thoughts that continued to linger at the back of my mind.

“So, do Tuesday’s work for you?” Dr. Poulos spoke while opening up her schedule book.

“Yeah. But if we can keep it in the mornings? I already have something scheduled at 2:30 I can’t miss.”

She smiled. “Of course.”

READER

“Fuck, angel. I can’t believe you’re going to Japan without me,” Noah pouted out his bottom lip in a playful sadness.

I giggled while holding the phone as I sat on the couch in the living room. It was our typical 2:30 FaceTime call, and I took it in the living room with Chase and Malcolm, who were playing a video game.

“I’m so excited. When I brought up the idea to my dad, he immediately bought me a plane ticket and already is planning our week together. There’s so many different places he wants to take me. I don’t think he expected Chase and Malcolm to tag along but nonetheless, he’s happy.”

“I’m happy for you. It will be good for you, mentally, to take a break. You deserve it.”

"Which reminds me; do you think you or one of the guys could come check on Salem for me? Just to make sure he has food and water while we're gone?" I bit my lip, hoping the action would make Noah agree.

He licked his lips, voice turning dark. "Yeah, of course. We'll take care of him."

I rested my chin on my palm as I propped my elbow on the back of the couch. “I’ll have to cancel our gym sessions and might miss a few Facetime calls.”

He placed a hand over his chest, faux betrayal on the soft features of his face. “How will I ever go on?”

Chase snorted and pushed his face into the camera of my phone. “Dude, we’ll miss you too. No need to cry over us, though.”

Noah glared while flipping them off.

For once, Noah was actually wearing clothes, admittedly much to my dismay, a read sweater. He sat at his desk with his headphones hanging loosely around his neck as he worked on a Rubik’s cube. While I loved our daily FaceTime calls, there was this deep lingering feeling that it would only hurt in the end when it stopped.

Not if it had to. When it had to because like everything else in my life, good things never lasted long.

I pushed Chase back on his end of the couch. “I hate those things.”

Noah motioned towards the cube in his hands, and I nodded. “I never could get them right. I’d get aggravated so fast and toss it in the garbage.”

“Take’s patience, angel. I have a lot of it.”

I blinked, almost as if I had been slapped at hearing his words; memories from that night crawling back to my subconscious.

“I’m known for having a lot of fucking patience. I will wait."

“Angel?”

Noah’s concerned voice snapped me out of my haze, and I hummed. “Did you say something?”

“When’s your flight?” He asked.

“Sunday.”

“That’s in two days,” Noah’s shoulders fell.

I somberly nodded. “I know. Like I said, my dad’s excited to see me.”

With the look on his face, I knew Noah wanted to see me one more time before leaving but he wouldn’t come out right and say it. Instead, he changed the subject slightly.

“What about you?” He clicked something on the keyboard of his computer, eyes only leaving the phone for a few seconds before giving his attention once again. “Are you excited?”

A large grin pulled at my lips while I shifted my position on the couch, now facing the television, Malcolm winning in whatever game him and Chase were playing.

“I haven’t been in so long, I have this dream-,” the words died on my tongue, not wanting to go into it with Noah.

I already thought it was silly. I didn’t need Noah to think that as well.

“Dream about what?” He wondered.

“Nothing, it’s way to girly, way to out there. You don’t want to hear that shit,” I laughed while casting my eyes away from the screen.

“Well, excuse me then. Just pretend I’m your girliest friend,” Noah changed the pitch of his voice to be higher. “Come on; I want to know. Your dreams are important, to me.”

I broke out in laughter “You’re an idiot Noah Sebastian.”

“I’m cool with that, angel,” he shrugged. “Tell me!”

With a hesitant sigh, I nodded. “Japan is just such an important place to me, for several reasons. I have this little fantasy that I’d run off and get married there. It’s so peaceful and quiet with my closet friends and family. One and done romance type shit.”

Noah stiffened while scratching his chin.

“What? I freak you out, girlfriend?” I joked with a teasing smirk.

He chuckled nervously. “No. I- uh, who’s the groom?”

“I don’t know, never got that far. It’s always been the small child in me’s dream.”

Why the fuck would you bring up marriage, you idiot! His face went white, and he changed the subject, clearly uncomfortable. What the fuck is wrong with you?

“Hmm.” Noah adjusted the headphones on his head. “Well, it’s going to be a lot of fun seeing your dad. I also have a list of shit I’d like for you to find me, please.”

“Okay, hang on let me get a pen,” I giggled while rolling off the couch to head into my room where I knew one was.

READER

“Y/N, dear, have you seen my-?”

I smiled while holding up my dad's wallet as he patted down every pocket of his jacket and pants. “Wallet?”

He pressed a kiss to the side of my head as he took the wallet, sticking it in his back pocket. “I’m almost ready to go. I’m so excited to show you guys the local market. I get all of my mochi’s from there.”

My heart skidded to a rapid pace, an image of Noah popping in my mind.

Chase walked out of the guest bedroom with Malcolm following close behind, tying his long hair back into a bun. “We really appreciate you letting us stay with you, Mr. Y/L/N.”

My dad waved Chase off. “You two have become like sons to me and everything you did to help, Y/N. It means a lot.”

I wrapped my arms around my dad, letting the familiar comfort and warmth of his presence radiate around me. It’s been years since I seen him but from the second he picked us up from the airport a few hours ago, my dad and I picked up right where we left off. The only difference were the wrinkles next to his eyes and the graying hair.

Just as I was about to open my lips to speak, my phone buzzed in my hand. My dad noticed and peered down at the screen with confused eyes.

“Mochi? You have your own mochi delivery service? Who’s the guy in the picture?”

Embarrassment filled me as my cheeks reddened with undeniable heat. Malcolm looked at the watch on his wrist and whistled low.

“Even with the time difference, Noah is spot on with their FaceTime calls,” he said.

Chase raised a finger. “Wait, is his contact name Mochi?”

“Noah, why is that name familiar?” My dad rubbed his chin. “Oh, he’s the guy that filled in no your last tour.”

“Yep,” I said popping the ‘P’.

“Does he have braids in that picture?” Malcolm tried to reach for my phone, that kept buzzing from the call, but I slipped away from him.

Now a few feet away from them, I answered the call with a small smile. Noah was bundled up in a variety of blankets, the orange glow of his neon lights shining from behind his bed.

“Hey, it’s kind of early there, no?” I said.

He yawned while rubbing his eyes. “7:30 in the morning. But it’s 2:30 your time, and I wanted to make sure you landed safely.”

I couldn’t ignore the way my heart fluttered with the concern in his voice and even though it was early morning in Los Angeles, he still made our 2:3o phone call; no matter how exhausted he looked.

“Did you set an alarm?” I questioned.

“Yep, even googled the time difference so I knew when to wake up.”

“Wow,” I stuttered. “You really-uh-you didn’t have to wake up so early just for our phone call, Noah.”

“Angel,” he readjusted his position in bed to lay one hand under his cheek. “I’d stop whatever I’m doing for these phone calls. They mean a lot to me.”

I swallowed the happy tears that burned in my throat. “Me too.”

“Mochi!” Malcolm popped up from behind me to make his face appear on the screen.

Noah rolled his eyes. “Fuck off, Malcolm.”

“Oh, Mochi. We miss you! Do you miss us?” Chase now appeared on the other side of me.

“I fucking hate you guys,” Noah sighed while pinching his eyes.

Pushing them away from me, I stepped into a quieter area of my dad's apartment. “Sorry. They say the contact name and the picture of you in the braids.”

Something unreadable flashed in Noah’s eyes but I couldn’t read into it; it was gone that quickly.

“My contact name in your phone is Mochi?” He asked.

I shrugged. “I bet mine is Angel.”

His silence was the answer I needed.

“You know,” Noah began. “I miss you already and proud of you, angel.”

“Proud of what?” I raised a brow while leaning against the wall with my shoulder.

“Doing something for you, not holding back.”

My heart continued to beat at a rapid pace while the butterflies burned low in my stomach. “Thank you, Mochi, that means a lot to me. Coming from you, truly.”

“Always angel,” He yawned with a smile. “Anyway, I know you’re busy so I won’t keep you. But maybe-uh-when you’re back we can go out.”

“Go out?” I said the two words carefully, making sure I heard him correctly. The pounding in my ears made it difficult.

“Like hang after our class or something.”

If he was nervous to ask me that, Noah gave no indication. He was his typical suave self; with messy bed head, tired eyes, and deep voice laced with exhaustion. The entire sight made my core burn with desire and I had to clench my thighs together.

“I’d love that, Noah,” I finally said after a few beats of silence.

“Alright cool,” he grinned.

“Cool.”

Even though now, we stayed so far from each other, I’d keep him in my mind, until eventually our lonely limbs connected again.

[hereticdrws]

Mizu headcannons

Warnings: panic attacks, nightmares, mizu being a dick in the beginning

a/n: every day I wake up and check tumblr to see if anyone has posted a new mizu fanfic so I have stupidly decided to take it into my own hands 🥲/j

- ⚔ - enjoy my lovelies - ⚔ -

• mizu is definitely very distant during the beginning of yalls friendship/relationship, mostly because she doesn't want to be hurt again (m*k*io)

•she also will try to push you away later on like, showing you her scars, revealing she's a woman, and js showing all her flaws (not all of them all of them but most) in an attempt to scare you away

•you both still love each other in a friendly way like when her clothes get cut up you sew them together, when she's hurt/sick you'll do everything in your power to heal her/protect her until she's better and vice versa

• while she does try and scare you away with her flaws she also tries to show you she doesn't care abt you by kinda being a bitch

As I walked behind her, I wasn't aware of the hole in the ground covered by snow and leaves, I ended up tripping falling into her back.

"Watch it!"

She said in an angry tone, glaring at me as I looked up to her from the snow.

"Get up, we don't have any time to take naps"

She sneered.

"I clearly wasn't taking a nap, I fell, you don't have to be such a bitch about it"

I said under my breath.

"What did you say?"

She said, almost seething.

"Didn't say anything"

I shrugged... she simply glared at me before turning back to the road, mumbling about me under her breath.

• she definitely becomes more bitchier once she realizes she has a crush on you

• when she realizes she has a crush on you she kinda freaks out, telling herself there's no way you would ever like her back because you were both women

•she tries to push you away even more when she realizes but you don't budge, mostly because you know why she's trying to push you away (I mean cmon, girl can't hide her feelings for shit tbh 😭)

• once you realize 'oh shit she likes me' you DEFINITELY tease the ever-loving shit out of her but in a low key way

I walked beside mizu into the crowd of people, we had just arrived in a town near kohana, mizus old village, after visiting her sword father. The crowd seemed to basically part once mizu stept through, making way for the 'man' but the second mizu passed all I felt was shoulders bumping me and pushing me away from her.. at least that was my excuse.

I grabbed her hand as to stay near her, pulling myself towards her and wrapping my arm around hers.

"What are you doing?" She said in a low angry tone, though the subtle blush creeping onto her cheeks proved her tone other wise.

"Trying to stay on my feet without being pushed down, why is there something wrong?" I said with a slight smirk, raising my eyebrow at the 'samurai not samurai'

•you are definitely the first to confess feelings for mizu, but mizu is the first to initiate the kiss

•she's taken of guard by you telling her how much/long you love her

•her eyes kinda brimmed w tears when you confessed because she was so used to the feeling of never being loved

•when you fist kissed she was definitely very passionate when it came to it, being the touch starved woman she is 😌 for ex: she would push you down onto the cot (small bed) and make out with you like you were her last meal, she would definitely leave marks but it would stay at that, nothing nsfw....... yet.

•when you too finally become a 'couple' mizu is like 1000% more protective of you, always has to have her hands on you, whether it be in a crowd, the forest, a brothel, or even a tea house, if any danger comes the first thing on her mind is to protect you and vice versa

• she's definitely a cuddler, like she has had damn near no loving touch in her life so when she finally dates you, she can't keep her hands off

•she isn't big on pda since she has to protect her identity and being vulnerable in any way in public is js asking for danger

•but she would still keep her hands near you, whether it be around your waist, your arm, or your hand

•she has a few nicknames for you. Ex: honey, baby, love, and doll or dove bit that's only special occasions 😌

• she's also definitely the type to get jealous, she can't stand when your around taigen because of his flirty nature, ofc if you wanted to be friends with him, she wouldn't stop you, she doesn't want you to feel controlled or stuck

•but she'll get kinda petty abt it like she'll start ignoring you and kind of avoiding you, but you'll talk it out and everything will be fine (ik ik lazy writing don't judge 😔)

•it takes awhile for mizu to open up about her past, like allll of it, but when she does your right there holding her, stroking her hair as she tells you everything

•when mizu sleeps she tends to have nightmares alot due to her past and present (girl cannot catch a break for the life of her) so some nights she'll wake up screaming with her chest pounding, flying to her feet into a defensive position, but once her eyes adjust she'll sink onto the ground holding her chest. You'll shoot out of bed, slowly coming towards her, whispering every move your going to make to her so you don't frighten her more, once she catches her breath she'll fall into your hands, letting you pull her back to bed.

Ladies, gentlemen, and absolutely everyone else thank you for reading this, my asks are open for art reqs and any little oneshots or headcannons or literally whatever else I haven't written in ever 🥲 I hope you enjoyed, reblogs r highly appreciated!! I love yall tysm for reading 😊

-rowan

[xoxo-author]

Partners in Crime

Authors note: I know SVU doesn't get a lot of love here on Tumblr but I've been binge-watching and love Valasco so here we are!

Pairing: Joe Valasco x Reader (Fem)

Warnings: My god-awful writing, mentions of violence

"You're awake! How are you feeling?"

I tried to offer Rollins a small smile but could only wince as pain shot through my face, "Sore, very sore."

Amanda picked up a chair before setting it down next to my hospital bed and sitting down, "Well after the beating you took, sore is to be expected." 

I close my eyes and let my head fall back, letting what happened flow back into my mind. Working the case, getting the tip that Barban was going to be at this warehouse meeting where he wanted to see new talent, him being interested in me and then losing it, the pain for his hits and kicks, his hands wrapping around my neck, and I'm pretty sure I remember Joe coming in but that's when things start to get a little fuzzy.

"Did we catch him?"

Shaking her head, Amanda let out a sigh, "After you were made, we rushed in. Velasco was the first one in there and by the time the rest of us got in there, Barban was unconscious on the floor next to you, and his face took a pretty hard hit. We get you into an ambulance and off to the hospital then we get Barban loaded up and off to the hospital. On the way to the hospital, his bus got ambushed and someone helped him escape. We don't know where he is yet."

"So I look like this for nothing?" 

Amanda chuckles before reaching out and gently squeezing my bandaged hand, "We'll catch him."

I give her a nod before letting out a sigh, a feeling of uneasiness spreads throughout my body. Barban was the worst of the worst and having my cover blown was less than ideal. If he figured out I was a cop then he could figure anything out, he could figure me out. He could figure out where I lived, my family, what precinct I worked in, and who in my life meant something to me. 

Letting my head lull to the right, my gaze lands on Joe who was passed out on the tiny green recliner chair. 

 "He hasn't left since you got here. We've tried to get him to go home, to shower, to eat, to sleep, to take a break but he refuses to leave your side. I have never seen him like this or how he was when you were in the warehouse." 

Before I could say anything, her phone started to ring, "It's Olivia, I'm going to take this outside and tell your doctor that you're awake. You should wake him up." 

My eyes follow her as she leaves the room, quietly shutting the door behind her, before letting my gaze fall back to Joe. 

Slowly, I push myself up into a sitting position and gently move my legs over the side of the bed. Gripping the handrail of the bed and as soon as my feet touched the ground and I was standing, a whimper fell from me causing Joe's eyes to shoot open. 

He was over to me in record time, gently grabbing my forearm, "What're  you doing?"

Swallowing so maybe it wouldn't hurt as bad to talk, "I'm up, so you're up."

Joe tried to guide me back to sit down but I shake my head, "I want to stand for a little." He nods and his eyes take in my face before moving lower, no doubt checking the damage. 

"I'm so sorry, this is all my fault."

I shake my head before tilting it to the side, "This is not your fault Joe."

"If I had been faster to get to you or if we had sent another UC in there with you, none of this would've happened." 

Reaching as high as I could without wincing, I place my hand on his chest, "Joe,  he figured me out, this is not your fault."

Leaning down, he gently places his forehead against mine, " When I got in there, he had his hands around your throat and you weren't moving and I couldn't tell if you were breathing. I thought I had lost you." 

"But you didn't." 

                                                                     **********

"Everything is looking good, the swelling has started to go down and will only continue to do so. The bruises will take a while to heal due to how significant they are. You can take your brace off your hand to shower but I want it on as much as possible. Take your pain meds as prescribed. If there are no questions, I will leave your discharge paperwork, leave you to get dressed, and send transportation to help you. Take care of yourself." 

Joe places a bag next to me on the bed before unzipping it, "I brought you some of my clothes because I thought you wouldn't want things rubbing against your bruises." 

I smile up at him, "Thank you."

Reaching into the bag, Joe takes out a pair of sweatpants before kneeling to the ground. Joe gently guides my legs through the leg holes before pulling the pants up to my knees. I grabbed the waistband of the pants while he gently wrapped an arm around my waist to help me stand from the bed. I tied the strings while Joe grabbed a white t-shirt from the bag. 

I take my arms out of the hospital's gown armholes and hold the gown to my gest. Joe tilts his head to the ceiling while I, as quick as I could, maneuver the shirt on. "You can look now." 

Joe shoots me a smile before going to open the door so the transportation guy can wheel the wheelchair in. Walking back over to me, Joe grabs my hands to help me sit in the chair, "By the way, you're staying with me until we catch Barban."

I went to argue but the look on his face told me that there was no way he was going to budge so I simply nodded.

"I'm not going to let anything happen to you."

[m1d-45]

if my favorite characters wanted to kill me i would simply let them. my only request would be that they do it from up close so that their pretty faces get to be the last thing i see <3<3<3

on broken bones

a/n: you…. you are my target audience.

(P.S: please note that the full fic was too long for tumblr! this will be in 3-4 parts, but dw, they’re all already mostly written!)

word count: ~2.5k

-> warnings: minor spoilers for liyue archon quest, the most minor of spoilers for mondstat’s archon quest, you are literally about to die, and do so but it’s ok i get revived, uhh blood mention but no gore, imposter au things yk? reader is Down Bad for zhongli at one point

-> lowercase intended!

taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3

< masterlist > || next part >>

you never had the highest level of self-preservation.

when you’d come to teyvat, the world seemed so kind, so you never learned to fear it. bugs never stung, any allergies you had never really acted up besides a sniffly nose, and the sun never burned. if you tripped, you landed softly, in the hands of grass that would never dare to harm you, and a breeze swept by the soothe the sting of your palms. the wind carried you down from high places, the water always keeping you afloat, the entirety of the natural world at your side.

or, rather, nearly the entirety.

despite wandering constantly, it took a few months to actually run into anybody. in fact, the only way you knew you were in teyvat at first were the sunsettias, and the hilichurls when you finally came across one of their camps. you have a feeling the dense forests and overgrown paths knew something you didn’t, looking back on it.

maybe you should have listened.

you stopped in the middle of a well-worn path of yours, stilling the sweet flower you were twirling in your hand. a few feet ahead, a stunned amber mirrored your look of shock, though her recognition was tinged with something more… bitter.

“amber?”

the bowstring in her hands doesn’t lose its tension. “greetings.”

that’s not the knights’ prescribed greeting, your mind says. you tell your mind to shut up, because that’s not what you should be thinking about when you’re looking at amber.

you wave, trying for a smile, and emotions you can’t catch flash over her face in rapid succession.

“how do you know my name?”

whoops. “who hasn’t heard of the knights of favonius?”

“those from other lands.” for being so young, her voice is so tired. she sounds like she’s barely 18, yet she’s so worn out… nobody this young should be so exhausted.

after a moment’s thought, you step forward, extending your flower-

her arm moves faster than you ever could, raising, aiming, and letting the arrow fly before you can blink. her shoulders are tense, her chest barely moving despite how harshly she breathes, arms still posed around her bow.

it’s only then that you’re aware of the white-hot pain in your throat, the sting of icy numbness swiftly taking its place.

the sweet flower falls to the ground, your body soon following.

when you wake up, the first thing you do is press a hand over your throat, but all you feel is the chill of your own skin. no arrow. no blood. you check your shirt, but there’s no blood there either.

it’s like it never happened. but you know it did.

still keeping a hand to the area, you sit up, ignoring how your body protests. you’re in another field, unsurprisingly, green grass and blue skies and red birds all around. it’s hard to believe that your run-in with amber wasn’t a dream.

even if you know it wasn’t.

you rise shakily, feeling very much so like you’re relearning your body. how to stand, how to dig your fingers between the sections of bark on a tree so you don’t fall, how to breathe when it feels like all the air in your lungs was in a race to get out. still, you breathe.

still, you stand.

still, you move on.

the earth seems angry.

looking out from the jade chamber, this is clear. the skies are an irritated gray, billowing clouds heavy with rain. they had come from nowhere, suddenly washing in from the north in with no warning, but a single drop has yet to fall. the ground occasionally shakes, enough to make leaves quiver, but no earthquake has come. it’s odd, like the very rock is holding in its breath, waiting for the trigger to let loose what is certainly disaster upon the land above it.

even the tianquan’s gems, normally large, sterling rocks swirling around her fingertips, refuse to answer her call. as she flips over a small coin of amber, the most she’s been able to summon, she wonders why.

one of ningguang’s many assistants comes out of the chamber, telling her that keqing has a report for her, and she tells them to send her out with a wave of a clawed finger. normally, she’d come inside—normally she wouldn’t be out here to begin with—but this… oddity in the landscape has her attention.

the door behind her silently slides open and shut, the clicks of the yuheng’s shoes the only indication of her presence.

“it’s odd to see you outside at such an hour, my lady.”

it’s midday.

“what is it, keqing?”

“this letter came in for you.”

an envelope enters her periphery and she takes it, careful not to damage the paper as she inspects the wax seal. it bears the insignia of the favonian knights.

“that’s hardly a rare occurrence.”

“indeed, but this one carries significant importance.” she takes a breath, an explanation on her tongue, but it dies. she knows she shouldn’t let her biases get in the way of the tianquan’s work, but this situation feels so wrong. her vision burns at the back of her neck despite her attacks doing less damage, the electro that dances across her skin hurts more than it should. it’s wrong, horribly so, but she needs to-

“keqing?”

she meets the tianquan’s eyes. ruby red dissecting her every move, and keqing is quick to look away.

“apologies, my lady. as i was saying…”

the dead refuse to rest.

they have always been unruly, leaving behind legacies and lingering feelings, leaving the living and letting them deal with it. what would be known as the wangsheng funeral parlor was established to battle these lingering debts, and it seems that even after 77 generations, the current director still has to pick up that mantle.

she’s felt it all day. the rowdiness of the undead, the spirits dancing and twirling around where they shouldn’t be. her soul told her there was one too many around, and so she had set her mind on going.

the director adjusted the flowers in her hat, watching in annoyance as her consultant thought over her words. she thought the answer was quite simple, and had rushed to fix the problem, but he was adamant that she explain herself first.

“and you’re certain?”

hu tao groaned, squeezing her eyes shut so they wouldn’t roll. “yes, i’m certain! surely youve noticed too, or is that vision for nothing?”

a glimmer of irritation crossed zhongli’s calm eyes. “this is a matter of utmost importance, director. the dead refusing to die is a serious issue.”

“you think i don’t know that? i run a funeral parlor-“

“director-“

“no. i’m going to wuwang hill, and all i need you to do is take care of the parlor while i’m gone. that’s it.”

“director, please. you cannot throw yourself into dangerous situations and expect me to sit by idly.”

“what are you, my dad?”

“i would hope not, as your father is currently deceased.”

in the gaping silence that followed, hu tao couldn’t decide if she was more shocked at the fact that he brought up her father’s passing, or that he had borderline joked about it.

zhongli cleared his throat, the only sign of apology she would receive. “i will go alone if i must.”

“you want to go-“

“indeed. i cannot allow you to venture into such an unsafe area on your own, and i myself wish to find the answer to this. if you cannot find anybody to run the parlor in your stead, then i will simply go alone.”

names and faces of employees ran through her head, options brought up and discarded quicker than any decision she’s ever made before. something in her soul demanded she go to wuwang hill, her pyro vision an insistent press between her shoulder blades, urging her to leave zhongli and just go. it was illogical, irrational, and she knew that if he saw he’d be worried and when all she needed was to simply leave-

a name emerged from the clutter.

“ferrylady.”

though his jaw ticked, zhongli nodded.

wuwang hill itself is uneasy.

zhongli has seen many things during his lifetime, but few of his memories could compare to this. the ground quivered underneath his feet, only truly steadying where he, as the lord of geo, stepped.

in truth, he had felt the same disturbance as hu tao, but had wanted to preserve his reputation as zhongli, ignoring the cold sting in his soul from where his gnosis used to be. his plan was to go after hours, when the dark could shadow his form, but now that he was here he was glad he didn’t.

the forest’s canopy was denser than usual, it seemed, barely any light filtering through the leaves. the will-o’-the-wisps shone brighter and more frequently than normal, and not a hilichurl was in sight. it was strange, unnerving to walk the familiar path, and he found himself prepared to summon a stele at any moment. the air itself felt tense, his element not resonating right.

how can stone feel hollow?

hu tao stepped closer to him, eyes uncharacteristically wide as she looked around. “why does it feel so… empty?”

he moved a hand to her back, urging her on faster. “i don’t know, ms. hu. please, do hurry.”

her fingers play with the tassels on her shirt as she walks, speeding up at his side. she’s always been fond of the macabre, but this… this isn’t that. this isn’t slow and sticky, raw honey made of skeleton bees that drips through bones and pulls at the hair atop skin, this isn’t the abrupt hit of symbolism or the stop of a heart as you’re face to face with a corpse, the smell of rotting flesh mixing with the bile climbing up your throat.

this is sharp. angular. a spike with every step she takes on the familiar dirt, thorns clinging to the lining of her lungs and digging in to hide from the chilling air. the sense that she doesn’t belong here, that she should leave, is steadily growing in response to the drive to keep walking, and she wonders if and when it’ll balance before tipping over. regardless, she keeps walking, steeling her spine and forcing assuredness into her walk.

besides her, zhongli isn’t doing much better. the air reeks of the sweetness of the divine, and the thundering in his heart matches, but here? of all places? he knew his god—he prided himself on it—and knew that they didn’t like places like this. and the feeling of wrongness, the stone beneath him seeming to slip under his feet and forcing him to walk quicker to make up for it, the claws of tree branches and roots of bushes somehow larger than before. as they approached the stone steps, he didn’t know what to expect, for once. he was unsure whether to be on edge, or to scold himself for being tense over nothing.

surely, he thought, rounding the corner, it couldn’t be nothing?

you watched the water ripple from your safe spot on the edge of the stone path cutting through it, smiling at the way the fish followed your hand when you hovered it over the surface. they were beautiful, some kind of koi by the looks of it, and certainly not what you expected.

when you recognized the wisps of wuwang hill, you had initially been afraid. it was dark, even during the day, and filled with monsters. not to mention it held the barrier between life and death, something you were not keen on ever getting close to. but as the shouts of the qingce villagers echoed in your ears, you decided it was the safest option, at least for the moment.

and it was. there were no hilichurls, no cicin mages, and the wisps seemed to float alongside you, lighting the way for a while before another came up and took over. they’d guided you to the domain, whose stone was shockingly warm. it was the crimson witch domain from what you remember, so that checked out, but for it to physically affect the stone…

you wondered what the archaic petra domain would feel like if that were the case. could stone feel more stone-like? if you were to somehow break off a chunk, would it do more damage than a regular rock? would that even count as geo damage?

you let your hand trail across the water, feeling scales bump against the pads on your fingertips with another smile. you wondered where they got their food, as the pond seemed both shallow and fairly barren, but there seems to be more and more greenery as you look. were your eyes adjusting to the light better, or were they the kinds of plants that only bloomed under certain conditions? but no, that would be for flowers, not-

“who are you?”

the harsh voice makes you jump, the fish jerking back before crowding the water near where you’ve fallen over. your surprise nearly made you fall in, but as you see who’s approaching you, you think that might have been better.

boots stomp over the stone that’s been your tentative camp, not stopping until they land toe to toe with yours. eyes carved from cor lapis glare down at you, cutting any argument you may have had to shreds.

yes, partly because zhongli is intimidating, but…

lighter shoes click and draw your attention, but you don’t get to turn your head far before you’re met with the pulsing black and gold point of vortex vanquisher.

“do not interest yourself in that which is out of your reach.”

oh.

you swallow in attempt to remedy the sudden dryness in your throat, following the handle of the polearm up to meet his eyes once more. his eyeliner looks sharper than on his in-game model, you note, and he has an earring, the golden jewel on it a perfect complement.

his eyes narrow, the set of his jaw making you think he’d sneer if he were anybody else. he rips his polearm from the stone besides you, “what could you possibly be looking at?”

you know this is it. you know exactly why he hasn’t spun his weapon back around, you knew it from the moment his sunset gaze fell upon you. so.. why lie?

“you’re beautiful,” you whisper.

and for the second time that week, you die.

[azurlily]

Hey there hope you’re doing well I don’t know if you’re still taking your requests at the moment. But if you are here’s one I would like Some head canon for Azula shocking, I know and Mai Tylee and Suki With an OC who likes to sleep topless If you’re comfortable with that or interested

I'm so sorry! I thought I posted this 3 days ago and I check my account and notice it isn't there. I checked my drafts and saw it🤦🏽‍♀️. The gif of Suki I'm using is the only one with just her(no other characters in the picture), if anyone could find more with just her I'd be so thankful!!

Also does anyone know why when I press my stuff(my posts) tumblr says it doesn't exist. Yet I'll scroll down in my acc and find it. It's confusing and I'm going to have to fix a bunch of stuff because of it.

Ozai's Angel's + Suki

When fem!reader sleeps topless.

Azula

Y'all ever sent hat shocked pikachu meme? Yeah that's Azula the first time she sees you sleep topless.

I imagine it was your first night sleeping in the same bed, and you just threw your shirt off. No hesitation. Azula turned and just stared are your bare back. You still had pants/shorts on so she assumed you were going to change. Although in front of her? Really? So bold...

Instead when you turn towards the bed to lay down, you hear the loudest little squeak! It's probably one of the only times Azula will ever act like that. It's just so surprising that you'd frivolously in front of her.

"What do you think you're doing?"

You would look over ins surprise and Azula would immediately turn around.

"Something wrong, zula?"

Azula will stomp her foot and turn back towards you, her eyes cast downwards. You didn't see anything wrong with your clothing choice seeing as you distinctly remember mentioning this to Azula multiple times before.

"You have no shirt and nothing to conceal your chest! Just what are you trying to do on our first night...disgusting!"

Of course Azula didn't mean that last part, but she said it anyway.

You just stared at her for a few moments and then laughed, if you're this far in the relationship(and it wasn't forced) you've learned Azula a lot better than most.

"I'm going to lay down, when you're comfortable: come join me?"

Just wait it out and within a few minutes you'll feel shuffling in the bed. Azula wont touch you in anyway, even to wake you up. The next few days will be her getting comfortable with sleeping next to you like this. Within a month(maybe longer if this is something that truly surprised her about you) she'll be spooning you and refusing to explain why. Don't ask either or she will stop.

Mai

The most calm about the entire situation. That doesn't mean Mai isn't surprised, she's the complete opposite in fact. Mai just doesn't show her emotions like others.

As you two were getting in bed after a long day of doing everything Azula wanted...and complaining about it when she wasn't listening. You and Mai just wanted to relax together.

It doesn't matter if it was the first time you slept together or if you simply always wore a shirt to make her comfortable. Either way Mai has to ensure she's in the right reality when you- in front of her and with no shame -begin to undress.

Mai is(despite popular belief) very awkward. Especially around the girl she's oh so in love with. Mai has, on multiple occasions, not said a single word to you for an entire day. Simply because you made her too 'flustered' to function and she was afraid that she might say something less than appropriate for the situation.

So Mai doesn't say anything. She stares, though. Her eyes don't leave you body the moment she notices what you're doing. It's already hard for her to look away when you have clothes on, but this?! You must be trying to kill her.

"Mai? Are you okay? I'm sorry should I put my shirt back on?"

That's about the only thing that will get her attention. Mai looks up at your face instead of your chest. It takes her a second to recognize your words. They turn her a slight pink, which she looks away as to not show you.

"No. It's fine. Warn me next time. . .please."

Mai has a tendency to make herself seem cold and distant for fear of hurting you. Unknowingly though, that's what ends up hurting you in the end.

You lay in the bed, turned away from Mai. You hear a slight rustle in the bed before a small voice speaks up. Not something you'd expect from her normally.

"I think you look pretty; I-I love you."

Your heart melts.

Ty Lee

A lil' NSFW

Ty Lee is the one who reacts the sweetest. I fully believe that Ty lee has seen some things from being in the circus and all. She doesn't react coldly like Mai nor is she embarrassed like Azula. Ty lee is simply happy her partner trusts her so much as to be naked around her.

You two had been sore from a long day and after bathing(separately) you headed to your room together. Ty lee sleeps in a loose shirt and shorts, she's very open with her body as long as it's her partner.

Truly, she flirts with others but you're her sun. The only person she would truly share her body with.

You take off your shirt with your back turned to Ty lee. Sometimes she wishes you would look at her when she undresses. It makes her feel better about her body, knowing her partner likes it.

Ty lee turns and sees you with no shirt. She just stares for a moment before turning back around, she assumed you were still changing and just waited a little longer.

"Uhm, are you done changing yet?"

You told her yes and she turned around. Nearly tripping over herself.

"Are you going to sleep without a shirt?!"

Ty lee barks out a bit of laughter with her words. She realized you were as soon as she said it. You smiled and simply nodded while Ty lee got a little closer to you. She enjoys your body, it's the most beautiful thing in the world to her. So it is incredibly hard for her to look away.

"You know I think you should sleep like this every night. You look. . .cute."

Ty lee pulls herself closer to you, your bodies press together. Your chests more specifically. Ty lee presses her lips to yours and you slowly lead eachother to the bed. Before you two find yourselves under the covers you hear her whisper.

"Your body's so beautiful; I'd like to see all of it."

Suki

I'm sorry if this isn't as accurate to Suki's character as you'd like!(I'm also sorry Suki's is shorter than the others)

Suki is definitely the most bashful, but in a way the least surprised. I'm more than sure she's seen her fair share of female bodies from the Kyoshi Warriors. The only difference is you're her partner, her one and only.

Suki is a very devoted lover, but(and were going off assumption) you're the first woman she's been with. So she feels safer than she would even wirh her closest friends.

As you two were heading in and getting the first bit of proper rest in a while. You didn't think about your sleeping conditions, you were just tired and uncomfortable in your own skin. As you take your shirt off you hear a loud, strangled cough behind you.

"Oh, I didn't realize you were going to change in front of me."

You laid down in the bed and turn towards Suki who looked away. She wasn't wearing her makeup, but she was still in her uniform.

"You should probably take that off. It'll be uncomfortable to sleep in."

Suki just stares at you dumbfounded, some days she wonders where her love for this idiot came from. Suki undresses, not fully knowing if you're watching or not. Her face reddening.

"Do you feel safe like that with me?"

Suki has been emotionally stunted due to her past. Many days, after meeting you, she felt like you'd find someone more devoted and leave.

That because she was a Kyoshi Warrior she wouldn't be able to fully love you.

You hum quietly, you're too tired to answer. Instead you slowly open your arms up from the bed. Suki gets in bed and snuggles into you. Her head pressing against your neck as she peppers kisses.

"I love you, you surprise me everyday."

No one in their right mind can tell me all of those girls don't have trauma. So I tried to sprinkle a little bit of that in there.

[lussiane333]

Can you write for Rz michael myers? you can write anything. I just need some new RZ michael content since I read them all on tumblr 😭 maybe some fluff headcanons? Please n ty!!

Things with Michael..

He knows there's something weird about how you're the main thing on his mind, like.. always.

He thought you did something to him at first, there was no way for your face and your voice to literally live in his head.

Let's say he's eating some baked sweets made by you. Oh yes, you made it with your hands obviously, with your small hands.. he remembers how warm he felt when you lightly brushed his hand or how you caressed his face with them once.. made him feel safer and calmer just with your touch.

*throws the muffin on a plate and leaves*

Nuh-uh, he REFUSES to feel like that.

But then again, he kinda longs for it..

Ugh, just why are you so nice to him?? He then notices it's not just how you talk to him.. It's how you still talk, even when he's not responding and acting like he doesn't even hear you.

Michael likes your talking, your voice, he likes how you say his name, and how you laugh..

How you help him when he's injured, how you cook, how you respect his needs, his needed space.. He likes.. you.

Now that's all before, but oh lord, when you two get close..

Follows you everywhere. Either you know about it or not, he's always there.

Checks out everything you express interest in.

So what he stalked and scared off your friends?

You mention it to him and he will just do it again.

Smirks behind his mask when he sees the look of the person you're somewhere with.

You know what i'm talking about, the classic Myers stunt, one second he's there and then he just magically disappeares.

Very protective of you and may seem some kind obsessive.

(tbh he is <3)

He just doesn't want to lose you and wants to show you that he cares deeply in some normal way it's just.. he doesn't really know how.

He's afraid you will get tired of his impartiality, and that you will stop caring about him because of it..

Michael tries hard to show you affection, he will come up to you and put his hand on your shoulder, leaning you close to him.

One of his ways of showing affection is towering over you, and simply looking at you. He also likes the size difference..

Whenever you touch him he kind of "petrifies" and his breath hitches. There's million thoughts racing through his head.

It's not that he doesn't want to be touched by you or close to you, he does want it, more than anything else..

He just doesn't want to be vulnerable, doesn't want to show any "weakness" as he likes to think.

It gets better with time, and he's thankful for your patience with him, he was never used to that.

Expect him to hold you tight in his arms when in bed. Arms around your waist when you're cooking, he feels the happiest when he can be close to you.

Is looking at you. A L W A Y S

You two are watching a movie, you're very focused and he is too, on you.

Later on, he won't even try to look away anymore, you will just take a part in a staring contest.

To some, his gaze is just blank, cold, and intimidating, but you found comfort in those eyes, and he knows. He feels it.

If you gift him something like a blanket or a pillow he acts unimpressed, offended even. Yet, he sprays it with your perfume and holds it in his arms while sleeping when you're away..

There are times when Michael feels like he did when he was locked away in Smith's Grove.. alone, where no one would see his tears at night. But when he wakes up in the middle of the night all sweaty, shaking slightly, and feels you holding him, whispering to him, he knows he found his home..

[autistic-katara]

ok i might get blocked by a couple ppl for saying this but the Jackson’s Diary fandom is seriously making me wanna become a proshipper out of spite (read the post before blocking me or whatever please)

like idk if u guys have checked the fandom tag on ao3 recently but theres been a bit of drama surrounding the fact that someone posted a smut-fic of Exer (an 18yo) and David (an almost 18yo, who was aged up A FEW MONTHS for the fic) and they were harassed into taking it down and making a fucking apology post ON AO3, THE PROBLEMATIC FANWORKS WEBSITE.

and this fic was tagged 100% correctly like it was very explicitly tagged as smut n stuff yet there were still a bunch of comments being like “uhm what did i just read 🤨” and when i made a comment defending the authors right to yk, not be harassed for making not even rlly problematic content someone who clearly would suffer withdrawal symptoms if they turned twitter off for too long started arguing with me abt how “erm ackhtually we should be allowed to comment harassment under ppls harmless and explicitly tagged fics cause theres no smut in this fandom and it shocked us” and u could just rlly tell they felt they were more righteous than God in their opinions and yeah so cut to tonight when i’m scrolling through the tag and i see a post titled “i’m so sorry” in which the author made a post basically being like “i’m so sorry for posting that ik it was disgusting it has been permanently deleted” which in the comments a few ppl were telling them that what happened sucked n stuff (myself included // judging by their reply they only did this to stop the harassment which yk, completely fair) and i went back to scrolling since i wanted an actual fic not fandom drama but like 2 posts down there was another post titled “please stop” or smthn like that where someone else made a post basically being like “guyssss can we please not write smut of these characters this fandom is so wholesome i dont wanna ruin it 🥺 anyways sorry this isnt a fic this just needed to be said lol” and like dude, my guy, WHAT THE FUCK?!

this is AO3, this is a fanwork archive that as far as i know was created (at least partially) due to the fact that ppl kept getting their “problematic” works taken down from other sites and the creators wanted to yk archive all fanworks. this is NOT a social media site where u can make callout posts abt how what someone else posted disturbed ur pure wholesome chaste scrolling by daring to uploaded something with *gasp* consensual sex between 2 consenting adults?! (or canonically 1 consenting adult and 1 consenting gonna-be-an-adult-in-a-few-months-but-isnt-much-younger-than-the-first-guy but u get the idea)

like guys, ao3 is not twitter. it is not tiktok, it is not tumblr, its not youtube, its not even wattpad. it is not a social media platform, it is a fanwork archive, specifically one that lets u post whatever kinda content u want (yes, even smthn depicting 2 consenting adult/almost adult participates that are in no way related having sex, ik its crazy what they allow online these days).

and look honestly the callout post wouldn’tve annoyed me this much if it was posted on yk an actual social media. like if it was posted on twitter or tiktok or on youtube as a video essay or even on here, like sure if i saw it id be annoyed that this fandom cant handle the tiniest bit of non-puritanicalism and fuck, maybe if it was on here id even drag myself into a pointless days-long argument that causes me suicidal levels of stress but on archive of our fucking own itself?! for the millionth time, IT IS NOT A SOCIAL MEDIA! u dont make posts like that that u want the rest of the fandom to read or whatever on there because its not that kinda website!

anyways yeah i hope i explained the situation ok, u might be able to check it out urself if u feel like it and yeah idk this whole thing just kinda felt like a wake-up call for me like yes i find incest and pedophilia disgusting OBVIOUSLY and i dont like ppl romanticising it in fiction but idk i’ve seen ppl talk abt toxic antis before and show screenshots of conversations where theyve acted super shitty but idk seeing this all unfold in person and having to argue with these hardcore antis just- i dont wanna be associated with these ppl, if these are what alotta antis r like i dont want anyone to assume i agree with them like at all, whether its other antis, proshippers, or ppl like me who have a super complicated opinion on it. like they harassed a person into taking down their smut and made call-out posts on ARCHIVE OF OUR OWN abt how they dont want their wholesome pure fandom corrupted by gross dirty irredeemable sex. and just yeah hope no mutuals i seriously care abt unmoot or even block me over this since ik a few of u r antis but yeah srry for this i just kinda seriously hate this fandom right now :)

also incase anyone is typing out a “kill yourself pedo” reply/rb rn; i turn 15 on Friday, i am 2+ years younger than ur innocent bb minor boy David and his definitely not already a legal adult boyfriend Exer so yk

[bubuslutty]

Frankie loves his girl

pairing: Frank castle x fem!reader

word count: 843 words

tags: nsfw brain rot, p in v, male receiving, female receiving, size difference, stomach bulge, possessive frankie, obsessive frankie, he loves his girl very much, clothed sex, blowjobs, car sex, reader is mostly refered to as 'his girl' or pet names such as darling & angel, use of the words pussy and cock, Frank spits in her mouth heh & other nasty tags okay

warnings: under 18s pls dni, overuse of the word 'love', I wrote this on my phone so I'm sorry for any mistakes, English isn't my first language as well. also this is my first fic posted on tumblr. pls be nice :(

summary: Frank loves his girl very much. He loves her mind and heart, but also her cute ass and sweet pussy.

Frank's the type to live in a cottage, maybe in the woods, with his girl. He's the type of man that would wake up early, kiss his sleeping baby and go walk around the property, checking everything just to make sure nothing happened overnight.

Frank knows they're safe, he made sure of it, getting rid of anyone who'd hurt his girl and their peace.

But he still has to do it, his little daily morning walk, to ease his soul.

Yeah, he's protecting his girl, she's safe because of him, happy because of him, and that makes him unbelievably happy, knowing she can sleep as much as she can, without having to worry about a thing.

Oh, how much he loves his girl.

She's his girl. Even thinking about it gives him butterflies and a hard cock. She's his, and nothing has sounded so good before.

He loves her so so much. He loves her smart words, her creative mind and her heart.

He's so in love with how she speaks to him, how she isn't scared of teasing him, of playing with him and being a little bratty. She's so smart and fun and beautiful in every sense.

Frank loves her mouth, her plush lips and tongue, he loves that he gets to kiss her everyday, loves that he gets to spit in her mouth and watch her eyes get all glazed over.

Frank loves her hands, loves holding them and kissing them. He loves it when she gives him back scratches, when they're lounging on the couch. He loves her hands when they're wrapped around his hard cock. And Frank's big, he's big. And every time his angel has her hands around him, the size difference makes him breathless, makes him cum almost instantly.

He loves her soft skin, running his rough hands all over her soft body. Her breasts, stomach, back, ass, thighs, neck, everywhere. He's obsessed and starved every time he lays his eyes on her.

It's embarrassing really, how every time he looks at her, his body reminds him of the nights and days he spent between her legs, either dick, hand or face buried inside of her sweet pussy.

And she's so wet, always so wet for him. Her thighs sticky and her pussy dripping for him.

She doesn't even wear panties that much anymore when he's around. Sometimes it's thigh length summer dresses with cardigans, tight cropped shirts and short shorts that would expose the bottom of her ass when she stretches, barely decent enough to wear out in public.

All she wears is clothes that Frank can easily take off, slide his hands in to wander on her skin and grope her. And even if she wore something hard to take off, they both know he wouldn't hesitate to rip it off.

Fuck clothes, he wants to see his girl naked and pretty under him.

His girl is beautiful no matter what she wears or looks like. Frank loves her in anything and everything. But he does have preferences, after all, he's just a man.

He likes her in just one of his t-shirts, with absolutely nothing underneath. He loves her wrapped in his coat, wearing a stupidly tight t-shirt and shorts underneath. He likes seeing his girl show off her body for him. Especially when nobody else is around to look at what is his.

He loves fucking her while she's wearing one of those stupid tight white t-shirts she likes to wear, the cropped ones, that leave her stomach naked, with no bra underneath. Her sweat, and his sweat would make the fabric obscenely see through, making her nipples visible. And if he's feeling in a certain mood, he might just cum on her chest, over her t-shirt and on the lower half of her face while his girl is crying and cock drunk.

Frank loves shoving his hands in her shorts, through one of the leg holes, groping her ass and squeezing. You see, he's a possessive fucker and he likes to touch, a lot.

He loves feeling her shake and throb, clench and shiver. He likes to see her beg for his cock and try to swallow him while being all messy on his lap, his balls wet from her saliva. He loves it when she grinds her sweet little ass against his crotch, smiling coyly up at him. He loves folding her while he fucks her to the point of passing out, so hard that he'd be able to see her tummy bulge from the size of his cock.

He loves having her on his lap, in his truck, holding onto the hat he placed on her head while riding him, moaning and babbling nonsense while his cock is splitting her in half. Shorts thrown at the back and panties held in one of his hands.

Frank loves his girl and her sweet pussy very much. And he'd kill anyone with his bare hands if they try to take her away from him <3

[mint-yooxgi]

{4} - Written in the Stars - Yandere!Idol!Yeosang X Tall!Chubby!Reader

Soft Yandere AU & Idol AU

Genre: Mature, Horror, Angst, Fluff, Slight Humor, Slow Burn

Pairing: Yeosang X Reader (ft. future Ateez and Skz ensemble)

Words: 12,502

Warnings: Slow burn. Minor fatshaming, oc gets called a bitch a few times (not by anyone important), minor assault and uncomfortable/inappropriate comments made towards the oc. K-Drama moment. I think that's all This is a Yandere story, it will contain themes such as stalking, violence, obsession, possessive natures, and just general overall creepiness and swearing. You have been warned.

A/n: It's been literally forever since I updated this omg, but I hope you all enjoy this part!! I'll edit it tomorrow after I wake up, so please excuse any mistakes. I'm super tired and not feeling the greatest at the moment because of it. Anyways, as always, feedback is greatly appreciated! Enjoy~

Also, gentle reminder that I don’t do tag lists.

Disclaimer: It's not often this chapter where this applies, but the following is important to note:

"This represents a line spoken in Korean."

"Bolded represents a line spoken in English."

"Bolded and italics represents a line spoken in Japanese."

Mini Masterlist - Part One - Part Two - Part Three

Placing the mug onto the table in front of you, you pull out a chair and sit down.

“I’m serious!” Winry laughs. “Rumour on the street is that you and Yuta are dating! After those images of him holding your hand at that award’s show went viral, it was the talk of the town.”

Letting out a puff of air, you run a hand over the top of your head. “It must not be a very popular story. Mark hasn’t said anything about it to me.”

“Maybe he’s jealous.” She shrugs, taking a sip from the mug you’ve already provided for her.

Immediately, you start laughing. “I highly doubt that.”

“Yuta is your biggest wrecker in NCT,” she shrugs casually.

“Yeah, but he doesn’t know that.” You reply.

“You told him that Ten is your bias, but not the fact that Yuta is your wrecker?” Winry quirks a brow.

“Essentially,” your shoulder lifts nonchalantly in confirmation. “Also told him that he was my first NCT bias cause he wouldn’t stop complaining about it.”

“Damn,” she breathes. “Boy must have ascended when you told him that.”

“You’re blowing things out of proportion.” You shake your head teasingly. “They’re just my friends.”

“Are you sure they think that?” She quirks a brow. 

Only, before you can respond, her phone rings. 

“I’m so sorry,” she grins sheepishly, checking who the caller is. “It’s Wyatt.”

Understanding passes over your features. “Well, aren’t you going to answer it?”

“Are you sure?” She looks genuinely hesitant to.

“Of course! He’s your significant other, after all!” You encourage her to answer by motioning towards her phone. “You haven’t talked lately cause of his business trip, right? Please, be my guest!”

A grateful smile tugs onto her lips as she stands from your kitchen table. Not even a moment later, she’s pressing accept on the call as she retreats into your living room for a bit more privacy.

You watch her disappear around the couch, noticing how she tucks herself away in the corner by the balcony. Her voice is low, so you can’t really make out what she says, but from the expression on her face you can tell just how happy she is to be talking with him. You smile.

Shifting your gaze to your hands, you pull your mug in closer to yourself. A moment later, you bring it to your lips, taking a small sip of the hot chocolate you’ve made. At least it’s cool enough for you to drink now.

Pulling your phone out of the side pocket of your leggings, you decide to distract yourself for the time being. You don’t want Winry to feel as if she has to rush her conversation with her significant other. After all, they haven’t spoken in over a week, let alone seen each other recently. With their busy schedules, you can’t even remember the last time she spoke about seeing him.

Scrolling through Tumblr, you check your notifications. 

Despite being a published author, you still maintain some of your blogs from before. The sentiment is far too great for you to give up now, and you enjoy it too much. Besides, it’s fun to post little pieces here and there on your old writing accounts. When inspiration strikes, it strikes hard.

There are only a few select people that know you still do this. Well, more than just a few. Still, it’s quite fun to see new readers message you asking you if you’re really who they think you are, only for you to reply that you are not. It’s like a huge game of detective for your followers that are convinced you are who you say you are not, but don’t have any proof. Of course, you use an alias online now, but regardless, you don’t think you could give up your blogs, even if you tried.

“Sorry about that.” Winry’s voice manages to pull you out of your thoughts.

Locking your phone, you place it beside your mug on the table. "No worries at all; I don’t mind.”

She smiles, but from the way she begins to fidget in her seat, you can tell that she has more to say.

You quirk a brow.

“Wyatt came back a few days early. He said he wanted to surprise me, but when he got back to our apartment, I wasn’t at home.” She begins.

You hum in acknowledgement.

“He said he had a surprise he wanted to give me, and that he wanted to take me out for the day.” She continues. “I told him I was spending time with you.”

You take another sip of your drink.

“Of course, he seemed a little disappointed, but he understood-“

“Winry, if you want to go spend the day with your significant other, don’t worry about me.” You reply.

“But we planned for us to spend the day together…” She counters, shoulders twitching as she fiddles with her hands beneath the table.

“I know you want to see him.” You smile assuringly. “It’s been, what? Two months?”

“Almost three.” She breathes out, whole body stilling as she stares at the top of your kitchen table almost absentmindedly.

“Then, by all means! Go! Spend the day with him!” You motion for her to stand. “We can always reschedule. Who knows when you’ll get to see him like this again.”

“Are you sure?” Hopeful eyes meet your own.

“Positive.” You nod, quite enthusiastically. “Go have fun with Wyatt! We saw each other last week, and I’m sure we’ll see each other again soon.”

It’s as if a tension lifts from her entire body. “You’re the best!”

You laugh, watching as she scrambles to her feet and towards the front door. “I know.”

“I owe you. Big time for this.” She says as you follow her to the front. “Seriously, I can’t thank you enough.”

“I need to run a few errands, anyways.” You wave her off, holding your mug delicately in your one hand. “Gives me an excuse to go do some things I’ve been putting off before tomorrow.”

“Oh yeah, your signing is tomorrow, right?” She finishes slipping on her shoes.

You nod.

“We’ll be there.” She states, rather firmly.

“You don’t have to-“

“Nonsense!” She shakes her head. “I’m coming to support you, and I’m dragging his ass along with me, too. Payback for this little ‘surprise’.”

The two of you share a small laugh.

“Okay, well, say ‘hi’ for me, and have fun!” You smile, holding the door open for her as she exits your apartment.

“Will do!” She calls over her shoulder as she heads down the hallway. “See you later!”

Waving your final goodbye, you shut the door softly. As soon as the lock clicks into place, a small sigh is escaping your lips. Well, there go your plans of spending your day with your friend.

Oh, well. It happens.

Stopping off in the kitchen on your way back to the table, you’re quick to place your now empty mug in the sink. A few steps later, you’ve moved over to grab your phone off of the top of the table, shifting to put Winry’s glass into the sink as well. 

Leaning against the counter, you scroll through your phone. You do have a few things you could get done today, but you weren’t really planning on doing them until later. Perhaps you can find a café or something when you’re finished, and get some writing done.

A sudden message from Jongho in the group chat catches your attention. It appears that they’re all at the dance studio for practice, as he’s sent a selfie to go along with it. Only, you can tell he was really sneaking a picture of the two males doing… whatever it is that they’re doing in the background.

You:Please tell me that’s some kind of elaborate stretch I’ve never heard about and not choreo for your next comeback.

You: And if it’s neither… Damn, you guys really get it on in the studio? I heard some of you were freaky, but I didn’t think you were that bad

Mingi: BAHAHAHAHAHAHA

You honestly laugh at how many emojis this man uses.

Seonghwa: Why? Are you interested in what goes on during practice?

Yunho: Wanna watch?

The side eyes Yunho sends you have you quirking a brow.

Jongho: Uh-oh, now the hot Cheeto is mad.

Another picture is sent, this time of Wooyoung angrily storming towards where you believe Jongho to be sitting. You can see both Mingi and San laughing in the background of this one while Hongjoong just looks exasperated.

Wooyoung: If you’re gonna sneak pictures of me in compromising positions to send to our sexy author friend, at least make sure to get my good side.

Jongho: What ‘good side’?

Wooyoung:Do you see? Do you see the harsh words I have to put up with from my junior everyday?

Yeosang: To be fair, he’s not the only one wondering

At the pondering emoji Yeosang uses, you cannot help but send a few laughing ones of your own.

Wooyoung: NOT YOU, TOO!

Wooyoung: First, you break my heart by giving me false hope that I’m your bias. Then, you won’t even tell me that I’m your wrecker. And now, you LAUGH at my MISERY?

Wooyoung: You are a meanie >:(

You:Wait wait wait

You: I knew that, but how did YOU know that? :0

A slew of laughing emojis are sent from a bunch of the guys, you smiling down at your phone. This short interaction has really served to boost your mood, and you cannot help the way a few chuckles escape you as you read their continued banter back and forth.

Hongjoong: You should come hang out with us sometime during practice. At least that way I know Wooyo will behave.

You can practically hear the whine Wooyoung is sure to let out in response as you read this message, and you cannot prevent the way your lips quirk upwards.

Seonghwa: Yeah! The staff seem to like you, and our manager already said it was okay.

A moment where you see a few of them typing their responses.

Wooyoung: Besides… you’d get to watch us dance~

You: Be honest, is this another one of your attempts to figure out my bias?

Hongjoong: No! 

Hongjoong: Most definitely not! 

Hongjoong: Why would you think that? 

Hongjoong: I would never!

You receive a photo from Yeosang of Hongjoong intensely staring down at his phone, his ears clearly bright red as he pouts.

Yunho:Betrayal…

You shake your head in amusement.

You: As long as you can guarantee I won’t be in the way, or be too much of a distraction… I’ll think about it.

Several various cheering emojis are sent to you by some clearly overexcited males (Wooyoung, Mingi, and Jongho), while the others are able to type out their excitement with small phrases.

San: Since we’re now all apparently taking a break… what are you up to currently?

You: Me? Well, I was supposed to spend the day with a friend, but something came up, so now I’m going to go run some errands. Might find a café of something and do some writing.

Hongjoong: Did you even get any sleep last night?

You: Hey! Of course I did! Besides, you’re one to talk. I woke up to five messages all an hour apart. You were up WAY later than I was. You need more sleep than I do!

Hongjoong: It’s not my fault I do my best work at night.

A meme is sent from you of a man in a purple shirt pointing his finger in the air while saying ‘you got me there’.

You: I swear, one of these days I’m going to knock you unconscious and FORCE you to sleep

Hongjoong: That’s rich, considering YOU are practically always awake when I am

Another meme is sent from you of a stuffed bear wrapped in a blanket burrito while laying on a bed. A knife peeks out from the blanket. The caption reads something along the lines of, ‘I will sneak into your house and replace all your drinks with sleepy time tea. You will be forced to breathe in comforting scents which soothe the mind, and as you fall unconscious, the last image you will have is of me smiling over you with a nice warm blanket tucking you in. This is a THREAT.’

Wooyoung: If this is how you threaten people, then I want IN

Mingi: Oh, oh! Threaten ME next!

You: You would not BELIEVE how many times my one friend sends me this, especially when it’s like, five am my time, and they’re just sitting down for dinner in their time zone.

Hongjoong: You drive a hard bargain…

Yunho: My god, I think he’s actually listening for once…

Seonghwa: I have been trying for YEARS-

Hongjoong: It only works if she’s the one to do it.

Wooyoung: I’d listen, too, if I had a pretty lady always telling me what to do.

San: Yeah, yeah, we all know you’re an obedient sub.

Wooyoung: LIKE YOU WERE THINKING ANY DIFFERENT!

The cackle that escapes you nearly causes you to drop your phone.

Mingi: Wooyo’s got a point…

You: Am I suddenly in the wrong group chat?

Yunho: Nope, same one. You should see how mad Jongho looks right now.

A photo is provided by Wooyoung this time of the youngest sitting against the mirrors with a frown on his face. He hugs his knees to his chest as he stares down at his phone.

Your own brows furrow in confusion, but before you can respond, Yeosang beats you to it.

Yeosang: Will you all stop fucking flirting with each other?

You nearly drop your phone.

San: Oop- we’ve gone and made Yeo mad

Wooyoung: Just cause YOU’RE not her favourite doesn’t mean you have to spoil OUR fun, Sangie.

You: Woah, woah, woah, who said he’s not my favourite?

This seems to shut all of them up for a good few minutes.

Seonghwa: Yeosang’s your bias?

Another minute of silence.

Yunho: You seem to have incited a war.

Another picture is sent. A pile consisting of Yeosang, Jongho, Wooyoung, and Hongjoong all seemingly rolling around on the floor is shown. San stands to the side with Mingi, the former attempting to pull the pile of males on the floor apart while the latter laughs.

You send some side eye emojis along with a few laughing faces.

You: You guys are really THAT desperate to know who my bias is?

Mingi: Does that mean Yeosang ISN’T your bias?

A shrugging emoji is all he receives from you in response. For now.

You: Any one of you could or couldn’t be my main bias. 

You: Like I said, you have to buy me a drink first ;)

Wooyoung: Why can’t you just tell us? :(

A sigh escapes you, thumbs hovering in the air over the keyboard as multiple of them seem to agree with Wooyoung’s inquiry.

You: It’s just a personal thing I have. 

You: I don’t mind telling other people, but when it comes to the actual people it involves, it’s a different story. I don’t know how much my opinion of each of you matters, but I’ve never really enjoyed picking favourites when that choice is told to said people. I don’t like the connotations of multiple people getting their hopes up that I’ll pick them as my favourite, only to choose someone else. I don’t like disappointing people, and I also am all too familiar with the feeling of not even being someone’s last choice. If I tell you who I bias, it will most likely be at some point when we’re one on one. If you’re still interested at that point.

You:I just-

You: Did that make sense? I can try and explain it better if you need me to.

Yeosang: We understand. Don’t force yourself to do something that makes you uncomfortable.

Wooyoung: Don’t worry! We’ll stop bothering you about it.

Yunho: Wooyoung… just agreed to stop pestering someone…

San: It’s a Christmas miracle!

Jongho: He’s still pouting about it in the corner…

A photo is received showing both Hongjoong, Mingi, and Wooyoung all standing dejectedly in the corner.

You: Damn, are you guys going to start growing mushrooms like Tamaki from Ouran now, too? I didn’t realize my opinion of you mattered so much.

You: If it makes you all feel any better, I think you’re all wonderful people. I thought that before I met you, and getting to know you all has only solidified that fact.

Quite a few typing bubbles appear onscreen. A moment later, you’re flooded by emoticons either blushing, screaming, and, or crying happily with hearts surrounding them.

Seonghwa: You’re a great friend

A soft smile caresses your features as you read his comment, a subtle heat rising up your neck. At the way the others all emphasize Seonghwa’s message, you cannot help the way your heart begins to flutter inside your chest. Truly, his words mean the world to you, and the fact the others agree with him is simply icing on the cake.

After sending a quick response to them, you decide to actually get out of your apartment for the day. It takes you no time at all to grab your one notebook, some writing tools, and your laptop, just in case. Packing everything into your one small cream coloured tote with the Skz Zoo characters on it that you got from their one concert, you head towards the door.

Slipping your shoes on, you grab your purse, slinging that over your opposite shoulder. You do a quick check in the mirror to make sure you still look okay before slipping out of the door. The faint clicking sound of the lock sliding into place is starting to become a familiar comfort to you every time you leave your apartment, walking down the hallway towards the elevators in the next second.

The ride down to the main floor is a bit slow, you focussing on your phone the whole time. Naver Maps rests open on the screen, doing a quick search of the area to find the best stores for what you’re looking for. Already, you have a mental list of what you need to get, and you figure doing that before settling down in a café to write will do you some good. That way, if you get on a roll, you don’t have to worry about cutting your time short to pick up what you need.

Stepping into the lobby, you send a polite greeting to the security guard behind the front desk before exiting the building.

The moment you step outside, you head over to the bus stop. Sitting on the bench, you wait for the respective bus to come, plugging in your headphones all the while. At least you can take your time now, and maybe explore the area a bit more when you get back. If you’re up for that, that is.

Half an hour later, you find yourself at a small shopping centre. You don’t need much, but you do need to get a few new replacement pieces of makeup. Then, you figure you can check out the bookstore before finding a place to work on your novel.

The night of the award’s show, you managed to finish off both your favourite shade of red lipstick, as well as your liquid eyeliner. Normally, you don’t wear makeup very often, but since you have a bunch of events coming up, and no personal stylist, you figure you should at least look somewhat put together. Not that that ideal will last long.

Still, it’s better to be safe than sorry.

Entering a few different cosmetic stores, you search around for the best deal. The first one you went into was sold out of the liquid liner you like to use, anyways. You swear by it, as it’s application is the easiest to deal with. At least, in your opinion. That, and it dries quickly, and isn’t prone to smudging.

Perhaps you should also get a pencil liner while you’re at it…

Standing in front of the display with your favourite shade of red lipstick already held in your one hand, you look over all of the options. It appears as if this store is having a sale on their eyeliner, the words ‘buy one, get one half off’ practically glaring back at you from the sign.

Your eyes light up as you spot your favourite liquid liner. Almost instantly, your hands reach out to grab one of the last two on the shelf. Then, comes the hard part. Picking a pencil liner to go with it.

That’s when you notice another person shifting closer to you almost timidly.

Turning your head, you see a person somewhat hesitantly standing a few feet away. Their appearance is slightly androgynous, their black hair falling to their shoulders in a semi-wolf cut. Every now and then, you see their gaze darting to you almost nervously, their eyes lined with black liner.

“I like your hair,” you hum, purposely focussing on the display in front of you as you pull one of the two options you’ve been looking at off of the shelf. “I think it suits you nicely.”

Almost instantly, the person’s eyes light up despite them averting their gaze, “Thank you.”

You blink, as if realizing something.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! I’m completely blocking the display.” You step to the side, smiling politely at the person beside you.

Timidly, they smile back, taking a step in closer to the display.

Reaching your one hand forward, you pull the other pencil liner you’ve been considering off of the shelf to compare it to the other one in your opposite hand. Your brow furrows, looking over each one of them carefully and attempting to find out what the difference is between the two brands.

“I personally like this one better.” A voice from your right draws your attention, and you notice the person beside you glancing down at the liner in your right hand. “It last longer, and if you want to go for a smokey eye, it blends really nicely.”

“Really?” Your voice sounds hopeful.

“Yeah!” They smile somewhat shyly. “Though, if you don’t want it to smudge, then I would go with the other one you’re holding. It’s more of a gel pencil, if that makes sense.”

Softly, you nod your head. “I don’t usually wear a lot of makeup, but I never fuck around with my eyeliner.”

“Oh, yeah. Eyeliner can practically smell fear.” They joke.

A small laugh escapes you, and you notice them chuckling along, too.

“To be honest, I’ve never really been into makeup, but I don’t mind it every now and then.” You admit, sparing a glance down at the products held in your hand.

“I love it.” They say, only for their whole body to stiffen in the next second. It’s almost as if they said something wrong, for they glance towards you in what you can only assume is fear in the next moment.

“That’s so cool!” You grin, eyes crinkling at the sides. “I really love the way you’ve done your eyes today. It really makes them pop.”

Instantly, their shoulders relax and they shuffle a bit from foot to foot. “Thank you.”

“When I was younger, I was always obsessed with different coloured eyeliner.” You say, putting the one pencil liner back onto the shelf since you’ve decided to go with the other one for now. “Never used them, but I would always beg my mom to buy them for me.”

“I think my mom nearly had a stroke the first time I asked her to buy lipstick for me.” They voice lowly, as if sharing a precious secret. “She was a little hesitant at first, but when she saw how much I loved it, she couldn’t resist getting me more. Now, it’s like a recurring joke between us for her to get me a new shade every year for my birthday.”

“I love this for you!” You grin widely. “That’s honestly the best.”

“I’ve always wanted to work in the film industry for a few years now, but it’s quite competitive even getting a foot in the door.” They tell you.

“I can imagine.” You nod sympathetically before your eyes are widening as if you’ve just realized something. Then, quickly, you’re introducing yourself, seeing as you haven’t bothered to yet.

“I’m still working on that name stuff, but for now you can call me Zed.” They say, bowing slightly to you.

You bow back.

Ten more minutes are spent talking with Zed in front of that display. You even manage to go on your brief makeup is gender neutral rant after they express the same ideals.

“Everything is gender neutral if you’re brave enough.” You comment lowly, adjusting the strap of your purse over your one shoulder.

“Here, here.” They mock toast you with the few products held in their one hand.

“By the way, you mentioned being a makeup artist, correct?” You meet their gaze.

“Yeah, you’re correct.” They nod once in confirmation.

“This may be really weird considering we just met, but if you’re free tomorrow morning, I have an event I need to attend, and I would love someone to do my makeup for me. I’m not the greatest artist myself, and I would definitely pay you for your work!” You begin, somewhat shyly.

“Sure! What time would you need me to be at the place?” They ask.

Five minutes later, and you’ve exchanged contact information with them after explaining the details.

“I thought you looked familiar.” They mumble, almost to themselves. “I heard about that speech you gave two weeks ago, it was all over the news. I just didn’t realize that that was you.”

“Yep!” You chuckle, grinning widely from ear to ear. “That’s me!”

“Is that why you’re picking up products today?” They quirk a brow.

“One of the reasons.” You confirm. “I have the rest at home, but you’re more than welcome to bring whatever you think you may need tomorrow. I know it’s super short notice, and we just met, but I really appreciate you agreeing to do this for me.”

“Hey,” they shrug, “work is work. As long as you’re serious about it, that is.”

“Of course!” Comes your immediate reply. “You’re also welcome to message me anytime! I really enjoyed talking with you today.”

“Me too,” they smile.

“Thanks for the recommendation, by the way.” You wiggle the pencil liner held in your hand.

“No worries at all.” They chuckle. “You looked like you were struggling, and I’m always happy to help.”

You begin to make your way towards the cash line with Zed in tow. Except, you notice them holding only one liner in their hand, as opposed to the two they had earlier.

“Are you not going to get the other one, too?” You tilt your head curiously. “It’s buy one, get one fifty percent off.”

“I don’t think two is in the budget for me right now,” they chuckle, somewhat embarrassedly. “Money’s a little tight between jobs.”

You pause momentarily, turning right back around and pulling the other product they had been looking at off the shelf before grabbing the other one that’s still held in their hand.

“What are you doing?” Their voice is a little frantic as they follow closely behind you.

“Buying something for my friend.” You reply, somewhat matter-of-factly. “What does it look like I’m doing?”

“You don’t have to!” Immediately, they begin to protest.

“Think of it as a small ‘thank you’ from me to you in advance of tomorrow.” You reply, stepping into line with them beside you. “Besides, I want to.”

They purse their lips slightly, shuffling from foot to foot before muttering out a low thanks.

“Don’t even worry about it!” You smile at Zed. “It’s my pleasure.”

Idly, you continue to chat with them as you wait to be cashed out. As soon as you’re done, you hand them their items while standing just outside the store.

“Thank you so much.” They breathe, almost in relief.

“Really, it’s no problem.” You smile, tucking your own items into your tote bag. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah! Just text me the details as soon as you can, and I’ll be there!” They reply eagerly, tucking their own products into their back pocket.

“Of course!” You wave as they begin to take their leave. “Talk to you later!”

The moment they’re out of sight, you cannot help but smile more to yourself. They were so nice, and you honestly loved every second of that interaction with them. If only more people were like them.

Adjusting the strap of your tote, you turn back to face the other shops lining the space. There’s really only one other store you’d like to check out before leaving to find a café soon.

On the way to the bookstore, you quickly text all of the information Zed will need for tomorrow to them. They reply quickly with a ‘thanks!’ And some excited emoticons.

Again, you grin to yourself, happy to have made a new friend.

Rounding the corner of the hallway, you spot the bookstore at the end of the row. The sign is bright, and you can see a bunch of people milling about the one section near the front. Despite this not being the store you’ll be having your signing in, there seems to be a large display of your books in the middle of the store. Luckily, your picture doesn’t seem to be anywhere near the table like the last bookstore you had visited.

Shuffling passed a few people, you’re quick to head over to the manga section. There’s a volume of Tokyo Ghoul in Korean that continues to elude you no matter how hard you try and find it. You really just want it to complete your collection at this point, and it has one of your favourite characters on the front.

Crouching down to look on the bottom shelf where you see the different volumes of the manga you’re looking for residing, you’re quick to scan them all. Your eyes practically light up as you see the one you’re looking for, only a sharp gasp coming from down the row draws your attention.

The sound of quick feet approaching you causes you to look up to see a girl and two guys rushing over to you.

“Hi, oh my gosh, are you the author of this book series?” The girl excitedly holds out a copy of the second novel in your first published series.

You blink up at her owlishly, “Uh…”

“You’re so cool! I really admire your work!” She squeals, drawing even more attention to yourself from the people around you.

“Thank you,” you smile politely.

“Anyways, I’m so sorry for interrupting you.” Her face immediately goes bright red as she averts her gaze. “Do you think I could get a quick picture before I leave?”

“Sure!” Slowly, you stand back to your feet.

Handing her phone to one of the guys behind her, the girl steps into your side. A wide smile is on her face as she throws up a peace sign, holding your book proudly on display. You immediately mirror her enthusiastic expression, heart warming at how happy she looks.

After a few pictures are taken, she’s turning to you once again.

“Thank you so much!” She bows lowly, nearly hitting her head on the table beside you with a full display of One Piece on it. “Again, sorry for bothering you!”

You have just enough time to mutter a ‘not at all’, before she’s giddily hopping away with the two other males in tow.

Turning back to the shelves of manga, you go to crouch down once more to pull the volume of Tokyo Ghoul off of the bottom.

“Hello, My Love.” A voice says from above you.

Figuring the person is talking to someone else, you opt to ignore them for now. Instead, you reach out to finally pull the volume off of the shelf.

A harsh clearing of someone’s throat is heard as a shadow looms above you.

“I said,”they say, much more firmly this time as they nudge you, not very gently, with their foot, “Hello, My Love.”

The sudden push causes you to stumble slightly, steadying yourself on the bookcase in front of you.

Turning your head, you peer up at the person, a slight frown tugging at your features. Quickly, you stand back to your feet as you see a male staring at you quite expectantly. He appears irritated, the corner of his lips tugging downwards, standing slightly shorter than you with his arms crossed over his chest.

“My bad, I didn’t realize you were speaking to me.” You incline your head in apology. “But please, don’t call me that.”

His brow quirks, clearly amused by your response. “Aren’t you into that shit, though?”

“Excuse me?”To say you’re caught off guard by his sudden attitude would be an understatement.

“You write about all that sappy romance stuff.” He replies.

“That doesn’t give you a right as a stranger to invade my personal space, or say something like that. I don’t know you.” You blink at him.

A puff of air escapes his nose in annoyance. “But you’re that author chick.”

“And?” Your brow furrows even further, taking a small step away from him.

“Come on, Baby, don’t be like that.” He sighs, his jaw twitching.

“You’re the one that approached me.” You counter. “And, please, don’t call me that.”

“You’re different than I thought you’d be.” He states, giving you a once over. “Bigger.”

“I’m sorry?” You recoil slightly, appalled by the sudden disgust on his features.

“I said you’re beautiful.”A sly grin pulls onto his features as he takes a step closer to you. “You’re not like other girls.”

You blink at him, quite rapidly at that in your state of shock. “What do you mean by that?”

“Oh, I think you know, Petal.” His eyes are suddenly hooded as he takes another step into you.

“Don’t call me that. Please.” You manage to slip around the corner of the table you’re standing beside.

“Why are you being so difficult?”The man mutters to himself, shaking his head. 

A call of someone’s name from the side draws both of your attention, and you see two more males staring intently at the one standing closest to you. The way they wear smug grins on their faces as they give you pointed once overs says it all.

“I’m getting there.” The man before you snaps at the two others.

“Did you want something?” It’s your own voice that seems to draw his attention back to you.

“Oh, look at you! You can speak a bit of Korean!” His tone is nothing short of condescending. “That’s wonderful!”

“I have nothing to say to you.” You state, rather bluntly before move to turn away from him. “Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

“Where are you going, My Dear?” The way he drawls out that nickname has a shiver of disgust running down your spine. The fact that he snatches your wrist in his hand has panic seizing your entire body.

“Please, stop calling me those names.” You yank your wrist out of his hold. “Don’t touch me, either.”

“Come on, Darling,” his eyes flash, “don’t be like that. I only want to please you. To show you my devotion-“

“Get away from me!” You begin to scramble away from him, noticing you’ve started to draw some attention from a few of the staff members working in the store.

The two other males suddenly turn and begin to head towards the exits while two staff members approach you.

“What’s wrong with you?” There is nothing but ire on his features as he spits out these words at you. “All I’m offering is a chance for you to recreate those sex scenes from your books with me. A once in a lifetime opportunity, if you ask me. It’s not like people are lining up to be with you, anyways. You should be grateful I’m even giving a fat bitch like you attention.”

“Is everything okay here?” An older gentleman with a name tag interrupts, looking between both you and the male before you.

“I’m sorry to cause a commotion, Sir.” The way you immediately incline your head in respect to the elder male clearly catches him off guard. That, and the fact that you actually answer him in proper Korean. “This man won’t leave me alone, and is making me extremely uncomfortable. He’s making rude and inappropriate comments towards me, and thinks he’s entitled to assault me.”

The woman standing beside the male gasps, recognition flashing in her eyes. Her one hand comes up to point at you, “You’re that author from the award’s show!”

This draws the attention of a few more people standing around you, whispers being heard as a few more people recognize you from the display of your books a few tables over.

Politely, you smile at the woman, nerves skyrocketing as more and more attention is brought upon you. Again, you incline your head in respect as she looks slightly younger than the man, but still older than you.

“You said this man was bothering you?” She immediately turns a sharp gaze to the person standing closest to you.

“I was just leaving.” He huffs, purposely brushing past you and bumping quite harshly into your side. “Fucking bitch.”

Eyes follow him all of the way out of the store as he rejoins his two friends in the hallway.

“Are you alright?” The older gentleman turns to look at you.

“Yes, thank you.” You once again bow to him. “I’m sorry, again, for causing a disruption.”

“It’s not your fault.” The lady shakes her head, immediately wrapping you gently in her arms and guiding you towards the back of the store. “Come with us, we’ll call security and have them escort you in case that man comes back.”

“Thank you, I really appreciate it.” You smile lightly, seeing as she sends a kind one back.

Looks like you’re not getting that volume of Tokyo Ghoul today, either.

Sitting in the staff room at the back of the store, you let out a long sigh. You clutch your tote close to yourself, purse resting between your feet on the floor. Your phone resides in your hands, and you scroll aimlessly through Tumblr while you wait for security to reach the bookstore.

Opening your messages, you’re quick to type one out.

You: Why do people feel entitled to another person?

Placing your phone upside-down on the table before you, you let out another sigh. Not even a moment later, you pick your phone back up.

Jongho: Did something happen?

Mingi:Is everything alright?

Hongjoong: Are you okay?

Your eyes widen at how quickly you’ve gotten responses, but that’s when you realize: you texted the wrong chat.

You: Shit, sorry! Wrong chat! Just forget I said anything.

Wooyoung: You message something as ominous as that and expect us NOT to be worried?

Yunho: Jongho’s already putting his shoes on.

You: Wait, does that mean you guys are done with practice for today?

Seonghwa: NO, we are NOT!

You:… you guys don’t wear shoes when you practice?

Yunho: We do, it was just a figure of speech.

San: He meant that Mingi and Yeosang are holding Jongho back from racing out the door as we speak.

You: Damn, this reminds me of my wondrous ‘protection squad’ days.

Seonghwa: Protection squad days?

You: Nevermind. Like I said, just forgot I said anything.

The door opens and in walks security. You take a few minutes to describe what happened and what the man that assaulted you looks like before the two guards are escorting you out of the store. One walks in front while the other walks behind you.

“We’ll lead you to your car, or the bus stop, and stay with you until you leave.” The one says to you.

“Thank you very much, I really appreciate it.” You bow slightly while walking.

The guard simply smiles at you from over his shoulder in response.

Once you’re on the correct bus on your way back to your apartment, you finally allow yourself to breathe a sigh of relief. Pulling out your phone, you check your notifications.

Immediately, you’re greeted by tons of worried messages from the boys, and even a few from some Stray Kids members. Looks like Wooyoung told Changbin, who in turn told Minho, Hyunjin, and Seungmin.

You: I promise I’m fine, just an uncomfortable encounter at a store.

Another round of messages are sent to you by the Ateez members, and you reassure them yet again.

You: Well, I could go for some boba now as a pick me up. Any of you know a good place in the area? The one by my house just closed for renos.

You notice a few of them typing a response before the first one comes in.

Yeosang: There’s one in the back alleys near Sinsa that’s really good. I’ll send you the address.

A moment later, a link to the Naver page is uploaded to the chat by Yeosang.

You: Thank you!!

Wooyoung: Daaaaaaamn Yeosang, you had that ready and LOADED

San: Don’t hate the man just cause he was prepared.

Yunho: Well, WE may have to prepare HIS funeral now

A photo of Yeosang being held in a headlock by Jongho is sent to you almost immediately after that message gets sent.

You laugh, a smile pulling at your features as you shake your head at your phone.

You: Don’t hate the player, hate the game.

A few more messages are sent between all of you, ending with you wishing them luck with the rest of practice. They eagerly tell you to come visit them soon, to which you reply that you will.

Twenty minutes later, and after switching buses once, you find yourself standing outside of the little boba shop Yeosang recommended to you. It has a cute little awning over the door, a soft pink in colour, while large windows line the front of the shop. It doesn’t look too busy, from what you can see, but the menu has a variety of options and you are more than eager to try them.

A small bell jingles as you enter the shop, the worker behind the counter smiling politely at you as you approach. Luckily, you already know what you want to order from looking at the sign outside, so you manage to do that fairly quickly. 

Five minutes later, you have your glass in hand as you seclude yourself in a corner seat. There’s a half-wall with plants resting on top of it to your left, while an open view of the store sits to your right. You’re directly across from the entranceway, but you cannot see the order counter, nor the worker anymore. Two more tables sit to your right, a small hallway stretching down after that towards where you’re sure the bathrooms reside.

Your tote rests on your left between your body and the wall, while your purse is on the booth beside you to your right. Considering you have a wall behind you, and there aren’t very many people in the shop, you feel comfortable enough to pull your laptop out. Once you’ve set everything up, you’re taking a sip of your drink while staring at the document you had been working on last night.

Scrolling back up to the top of the chapter, you begin.

Editing what you wrote the previous night takes some time, but by the time an hour has passed, you’ve start to write more for the chapter you’re currently on. It took a little bit of time, but you finally know how you want to end this particular scene, and you’re challenging yourself to see if you can finish it before you finish your drink.

Unfortunately for you, you’ve always been a fast drinker. Especially when you haven’t had much to drink all day.

The sound of another glass being placed onto the table before you draws your attention from your screen.

“Sorry to interrupt you,” it’s the worker you ordered your drink from before. “I saw your speech from the awards show when it aired, and I just wanted to say I really admire you. Thank you for everything you do! I didn’t want to say anything before since I was on the clock, but my shift just ended and I noticed you hadn’t left yet, so I wanted to say something before I went home.” They smile shyly, “and give you a refill of your drink. Work hard, and have a lovely day!”

“Oh, thank you so much!” You smile back at them as they clear your empty glass from the table. “That’s so kind of you!”

A nod is all you get in response as a soft blush begins to dust their features. Not even a moment later, they turn away, leaving you on your own once more.

Another hour and a half passes by with you furiously typing away at your laptop. You’d like to say that you hardly get distracted, but there seems to be this one person who has been constantly walking passed your table in hopes for you to notice them. The first few times, you glanced up, eyes being drawn to the movement given how close they were to your table, but by the fifth time, you started to ignore them.

That is, until they decided to actually approach your table.

The conversation was short, and awkward. They kept stuttering over their words, not to mention they kept interrupting you while you’re trying to work.

That’s the one thing that irritates you no matter what. Nothing is worse than being in the middle of writing a scene, deep in the flow of words, only to be interrupted or distracted by someone. Really, you know it’s not their fault, but you still cannot help your annoyance at the situation. Once or twice, you can brush it off, but the third time they do it, you’re a little blunt with them when you respond. You don’t mean to be, but alas, it happens.

Approximately fifteen minutes go by without another interruption, and you manage to finish the scene you’re working on. You’re almost done with the current chapter, and all that’s really left to do is round it out, and edit the final product. To say you’re happy with what you’ve done would be an understatement.

This time, when you notice someone approaching your table, you don’t even bother to glance up. You figure it’s that person coming to bother you again, so you opt to continue typing away at your laptop, staring intently at your screen.

The sound of two glasses being placed onto the table has your ears quirking, even more so when you hear the chair across from you scraping against the floor.

A tremendous sigh escapes you, “Look-“

Your words die in your throat as you see the person now sitting across from you. They wear a black bucket hat, strands of what appears to be newly bleached hair sticking out from beneath the material. They blink at you with somewhat wide eyes, freezing in their movement of pushing a brand new cup of boba towards you.

“Yeosang?” You keep your voice low, blinking at him in mild shock. “What are you doing here?”

He smiles faintly, resuming his motion of pushing that one drink towards you. “Practice ended early.”

It is then that you glance at the time, seeing that it’s starting to become late into the afternoon. You honestly haven’t been keeping a close track of time while you’ve been here, only truly registering how long you’ve actually been writing for.

Softly, you close your laptop. “Aren’t you worried about being spotted?”

“Not here.” He shakes his head. “It’s actually a really common spot for a lot of us. The staff are discreet, and not many people know about it.”

Briefly, that interaction with that one worker earlier who brought you your second drink flashes through your mind. You smile in understanding, “I see.”

“Are you okay, though?” He blinks a few times, innocently. “You seemed irritated when I got here.”

Your eyes quickly scan the shop, not seeing that person who kept bothering you earlier in their spot by the windows.

“Better now,” you reply, honestly. “Just kept getting distracted, is all.”

“I thought you didn’t like using your laptop in public?” He quirks a brow, taking a sip of his own drink.

“When I’m up against the wall, anything goes.” You shrug, and almost immediately, he starts choking on his drink. “Oh my god, are you okay?”

He waves you off, hitting his chest with a fist lightly. 

Soon after, he clears his throat. “I’m good.”

“Good.” You chuckle faintly. “Last thing I need is your fans coming after me for choking out their favourite member.”

“I think you should be more worried about Wooyoung.” He comments, a hint of irritation on his face.

Your brow furrows, “Why?”

“He’d be next in line.”

Your eyes nearly bug out of your head.

“I-“ you blink rapidly a few times, swallowing the sudden dryness in your throat. “Are you implying Wooyoung wants me to choke him?”

“He’s not the only one.” Yeosang replies, a slight bitterness lingering in his tone. “Mingi has spent many a night ranting about how he wants to be suffocated between your-“

Yeosang seemingly catches himself in the last second as he spares a glance at you.

Your mouth hangs open in pure disbelief, blinking at him in shock. You hands rest on the table before you, a vibrant heat rising to your cheeks. Of course, you can most certainly incur where Yeosang was going when he was speaking just now, your heartbeat thundering in your ears.

“Sorry.” He averts his gaze, somewhat embarrassed.

In the next moment, you’re shaking your head.

“No, no,” you manage to organize your thoughts, clearing your throat, “I’m just surprised, is all.”

“What? Surprised that some idols have horny fantasies, too?” He quirks a brow, slight amusement shining in his eyes.

“Oh, no.” Your nose scrunches as you shake your head mildly. “If they read my books and thoroughly enjoy them, that fact doesn’t surprise me at all.”

“Then, why do you look so shocked?” He tilts his head slightly in inquiry.

Your lips pull back in a tight smile. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I’m curious, though.” He blinks, taking another sip of his drink.

You reach out to grab the full glass, noticing how the drink appears to be the same one you’ve been drinking since you got here: matcha milk tea with pearls.

“You’re aware I am a fan of Ateez, correct?” You look at him somewhat expectantly.

“Believe me, I’m well aware.” He nods along with your words.

From the way he still stares at you, with those wide eyes, has you exhaling lowly.

“Let me put it this way,” you take a sip of your drink, noticing how the label said it had been made with soy milk. In the back of your head, you wonder if he knows you’re lactose intolerant, or if it was just a personal choice on his part. “How would you feel if you suddenly found out Emma Watson admitted to having sexual fantasies about you?”

Yeosang freezes right before your very eyes, nodding slowly as realization crosses his features. Then, as if making another connection, his brow furrows.

“You find Mingi attractive.” The statement is a bit blunt as he says this, grip tightening over his drink.

“I thought I told you that I find all of you attractive?” You quirk a brow playfully at him in response.

“Right.” He nods, seemingly in recollection before halting all movement once more. “But you desire Mingi.”

If you didn’t know any better, you’d say that hint of bitterness is back in his voice again.

“I desire many things, Yeosang,” you begin. “That doesn’t mean I’m going to indulge in them.”

“But you would if he offered?” He places his glass a bit firmly back onto the top of the table.

“Probably not.” Your face scrunches slightly as you consider his words. “I don’t know him like that. I don’t know any of you like that, and it takes a lot for me to be intimate with another person in such a way.” You meet his gaze. “Are you familiar with the term demisexual?”

The way he blinks at you blankly is answer enough.

“It means a person has to have a strong emotional connection with someone before experiencing sexual attraction.” You explain.

He shakes his head, still not quite understanding.

“It means I don’t do hookups.” You add. “Hookup culture is not for me.”

Understanding crosses his features as his lips part slightly, a soft ‘oh’ falling from him in the next second.

“On top of that, I am also demiromantic.” You continue. “Meaning the same thing, only this time it’s considering romantic attraction. It takes a lot for me to fall in love, and it takes a lot for me to be intimate with someone.”

“So, you wouldn’t-“

“No.” You shake your head, cutting him off. “I may have desires, Yeosang, but there is a huge difference between reality and fiction.”

His eyes narrow slightly at you in response, and you can practically see the gears turning in his head.

“You’ve fantasized before? About your bias?”

You nearly spit out your drink as you go to take a sip. Coughing a few times, you rub at your chest, noticing how he hasn’t torn his eyes off of you for a single second.

“I’ve fantasied more about my own characters.” You admit once you finally manage to get your breathing back under control.

“That’s not a ‘no’,” he hums, brow quirks slightly in amusement.

“Why? Suddenly curious about whether or not I’ve fantasized about you?” You turn the question back on him, noticing how he begins to splutter almost immediately.

The way red begins to slowly creep up his neck has you laughing.

“I’m just kidding.” You reach across the table to pat his hand gently. “Though, I could have sworn you were about to ask me about my Ateez bias again.”

He averts his eyes only briefly, “no.”

“I mean, if you want to know, I don’t mind telling you.” You shrug. “We are alone, and you did buy me a drink.”

You can see the sudden eager gleam in his eyes as he leans the slightest bit forward in his seat. His lips part, and you hear the breath he takes before his shoulders seemingly deflate. 

You quirk a brow.

He shakes his head, somewhat dejected. “I’d rather not.”

The way he suddenly looks tense before you has you cautiously trailing your gaze over him in response. You’re about to ask if he’s sure of not, but at the way he shakes his head, almost absentmindedly as his hand tightens around his drink once more is all the answer you need.

So, you decide to change the subject.

“How was practice?” Your soft inquiry seems to manage to pull him out of your thoughts.

You take another sip of your drink as he responds, a gentle tug of his lips upwards as he recounts the way Hongjoong had to chase Wooyoung at one point to continue learning the new choreography.

“You should have seen the way Jongho practically lunged at his phone each time it pinged.” Yeosang half rolls his eyes. “He thought it was you every time.”

Your eyebrows raise in amusement, swirling the contents of your drink around in your hand. Honestly, your heart warms at the thought of Jongho being so excited to message you that he literally jumps at his phone every time.

“I thought you guys said I wouldn’t be a distraction?” You tease. “Just imagine what it would be like if I was actually there.”

“You think Mingi’s bad for using his pelvis during concerts?” Yeosang shakes his head, almost exasperatedly.

You laugh, tossing your head back as your eyes crinkle at the sides.

Again, once you manage to calm down, you notice Yeosang staring at you exactly like he did that first day you met him on the plane. Though, again, you brush it off.

“Well, I know for a fact the Mingi Stans are not complaining.” You grin. “You should see the amount of videos my friends who bias him send me of him when he does those things. It’s fun watching them freak out over it.”

“But you don’t?” He quirks a brow.

“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t.” You shrug casually. “I have my own selection of videos and pictures of my biases that ruin me in the best ways.”

“Ah, so you’re not immune.” He nods in understanding.

“Oh, most definitely not.” You snort. “I am just as…” you hum, searching for the right word, “feral as some of my friends. You just haven’t seen it, yet.”

“Are you offering to show me?” He quirks a brow.

“Depends.” The corner of your lips quirk upwards deviously. “When’s your next comeback, again?”

Yeosang leans back in his chair, observing you carefully. “You know, now that we’re friends, I think you should hype us all up more.”

“I can do that.” You readily agree. “Next comeback, I’ll give you all my live reactions. Well… within reason.”

“I look forward to it.” He grins.

“If the other guys get weirded out by it, then I’m blaming you.” You point an accusatory finger at him playfully.

“I’ll take full responsibility.” He raises his own hands in front of himself, almost as if in mock self-defence.

“You better,” you joke. “I don’t wanna lose my new friends that quickly. I really enjoy talking with you guys.”

Yeosang’s lips twitch upwards faintly in the corners, almost involuntarily. “I enjoy talking with you, too.”

“Oh?” You quirk a teasing brow. “Even when we flirt in front of you? Which we weren’t, by the way.”

Yeosang’s lips part, mouth opening and closing in protest despite no words escaping him.

“Nah, I’m just kidding,” you playfully pat his hand that he still has resting on top of the table. “If I ever make you uncomfortable, don’t be afraid to tell me. Boundaries are important, especially when they’re your own.”

“I will.” He smiles faintly.

“Same goes for if I start rambling too much, or if I’m being annoying, or if-“

“You’re not annoying.” The suddenness that Yeosang cuts you off with surprises you. “Why would you think you’re annoying?”

“I, uh-“

“Who told you that you’re annoying?” His brow furrows, clear confusion on his face. There’s something else there, you can see it shining behind his eyes, but you’re unsure of what it could be.

“Just a general comment,” you smile, somewhat tightly at him in response.

“Oh.” He seems to calm down, if only slightly. “Well, don’t think that you’re annoying. You’re not. I enjoy talking with you, and I enjoy listening to you speak.”

You blink in mild shock, a shy smile pulling at your lips as you avert your gaze.

“Thank you, Yeosang. That really means a lot to me.”

“Don’t be afraid to be yourself around me.” He swirls the content of his drink around slightly. “I quite like the real, unfiltered you.”

Your breath hitches in your throat, and you cannot help the way your back straightens. However, before you can so much as thank him again, he’s clearing his throat.

“So,” he stares intently at the contents of his drink. “What’s your favourite colour?”

You think this is probably the most talkative you’ve ever witnessed Yeosang to be, and to say you’re caught off guard is an understatement. You both continue to ask each other questions, laughing and getting to know each other better as the time continues to pass around you.

Before you know it, another hour and a half has passed, and you notice that the sun is beginning to set in the distance. Though, that’s not the only thing you’ve started to notice.

For the past twenty minutes or so, you’ve spotted two girls sitting a little ways away from your own table. They constantly peer over towards you, whispering quite loudly to each other while staring between both you and Yeosang. 

You’re starting to get worried. The last thing you know he needs is word to get out that he’s been seen out with a girl. The setting could heavily imply a date, and that fact alone is enough to have you swallowing nervously. He doesn’t need a scandal, and you would hate for that to happen, especially since you consider all of Ateez to be your friends now.

“I’ll be right back.” Yeosang whispers lowly as he pushes his chair out from the table.

You find you can only nod in response, watching as he disappears down the hallway to your right for the moment.

Carefully, you observe the girls after pulling out your phone. Resting it on the table, you begin to put your laptop away, cleaning up your mess to appear as if you’re getting ready to leave. Every now and then, you glance to them, straining your ears to attempt to overhear their conversation.

“No, I’m positive that’s him.” The one says. “I saw this online forum post about how this place is common ground for a lot of idols, especially him.”

“It’s hard to tell since he’s wearing a hat, and not looking in our direction.” The other replies, not as lowly as the first girl who spoke. “Besides, why would he be out with someone like her?”

The first girl shrugs. “Maybe it was a dare, or a private contest.”

“He seems to be having a good time.” The second one bitterly mutters.

“He could be pretending.”

“He’s not that great of an actor.”

Your eyes widen slightly. Some fans they seem to be, considering how they seem to be acting right now. Still, their conversation worries you.

“We should follow them when they leave. It looks like she’s packing up, anyways.” The first one whispers again to her friend.

Your heart drops, and you find yourself grabbing your phone. You do your best to appear casual as you open your messages to send one to Yeosang privately.

You: Bad news. It looks like those two girls sitting behind us might have recognized you. They think we’re on a date, but they’re not 100% convinced you are who they think you are.

You just hope he sees your message before he comes back out.

A moment later, you see he’s replied.

Yeosang: We should leave then.

You:Great plan!!

You: Except that I overheard them saying they’re going to follow us to find out if you are who they think you are. You’re lucky you’re wearing that hat.

You: Wait, I have an idea.

You: Call me crazy, but I think we might be able to fool them into thinking that they’re wrong about who you really are.

Yeosang: What do you have in mind?

You: Keep your head down when you come back out, and then just follow my lead.

Yeosang: That sounds ominous.

You: I know. You’re going to have to trust me, though. Can you do that, Yeo?

It takes a moment for him to respond, and you cannot help the way your one finger taps at the side of your phone nervously as you wait.

Yeosang: I trust you.

You: Heads up: I’m about to get up close and personal with you real quick. I won’t purposely do anything to make you uncomfortable, I promise you that, but if we want to make this believable, we’re going to have to act like a couple.

Again, it takes a moment for him to respond, and you can feel your heart positively thundering inside of your chest. Anxiety floods your veins, and already you can feel your palms beginning to sweat. You just hope you look calmer than you feel.

Yeosang: I trust you.

You: Alright. Wait another minute and a half or so, and then come back out. Make sure all of your hair is tucked beneath your hat, too.

Placing your phone onto the top of the table, you’re quick to reach into your purse. Digging around beneath your wallet, you manage to pull out the case you’re looking for.

You place it onto the table, right next to your phone.

Turning to your opposite side, you rummage around in your tote bag. A small black box is pulled out, and you’re quick to open it. A small tube of lipstick falls into your open palm, and you toss the now empty container back into your tote.

Grabbing your phone, you make a show of using your reflection to apply the shade to your lips, making sure it’s evenly applied before you’re standing back to your feet. Then, you’re reaching over to grab your bags, slinging your purse over your one shoulder while you hold onto the tote in your hand. Once your other hand is free, you grab your phone and slide it into your back pocket before grabbing that case from on top of the table. 

Luckily, as you had been talking with Yeosang, he had already managed to finish his drink. He also took the liberty to return the empty glasses to the front, so all you have left is to give your final glass back to the worker behind the counter.

A few steps later, and you do just that, your tote hanging off of your arm lightly. You can just feel the gazes of those two girls following you the whole time, and just as you cross the small space of the boba shop, you see Yeosang appear from the back hallway. His head is angled downwards, pretending to look at something on his phone, and you notice how his hair is now completely tucked beneath that hat of his.

Purposefully, you make a show of skipping the rest of the way over to him eagerly.

“Kyungmin!” You giggle, pulling him closer to you by his wrist. A gentle kiss is placed onto the side of his exposed cheek, a red lipstick stain now painting his skin. “Let’s go get tteokbokki! I’m hungry!”

Quickly, you begin dragging him out of the shop, handing him both your tote bag to carry, and that small case held in your hands.

“Don’t forget to put your glasses back on. I know you hate them, but I think they make you look so handsome!” You purposely stand on his right side, blocking him as much as you can from the two girl’s view. Luckily, your height practically swamps him, his figure hidden quite easily behind your frame.

Yeosang is quiet, nodding faintly to your words as he walks beside you. He’s already tucked his phone into his pocket, opening up the case with your glasses inside seamlessly. He’s quick to slip them on as you step outside, wrapping your one arm around his shoulders as you walk down the deserted back alleys.

Unfortunately, you can practically hear the two girls scrambling after you once you get a certain distance down the street.

Subtly, you lean into Yeosang’s side.

“They’re still intent on following us.” You whisper lowly as you pick up your pace.

“What are we going to do?” There’s a slight panic to his voice that you notice almost immediately.

“Do you trust me?” Your eyes dart to another, more secluded alleyway you can see up ahead.

Yeosang swallows thickly before nodding his head.

In the blink of an eye, you’ve pulled him into that side alley. Your left hand rests beside his head, blocking his view from the entranceway, but also ensuring his face is covered should the two girls come rushing around the corner.

“We don’t have much time, but we have to make it convincing that we’ve just been making out.” You say, quite bluntly as you lean into him.

You swear Yeosang’s eyes nearly bulge out of his head.

“We can’t slip up now, and the staging is important.” You bring your right hand up and lick your thumb, moving to smear some of your lipstick in the next second. “I’m really sorry it’s come to this, but I think it will work.”

Yeosang’s eyes briefly dart downward, and you assume he’s now staring at the stain of red on your thumb. He swallows thickly. “I trust you.”

Moving as precisely as you can, you begin to smear some of that red on your thumb on the corner of his mouth.

“I’m really sorry for doing this, I swear to you I’m not just making you do this for the adrenaline kick.” Your words are rushed, and you swallow the dryness in your throat. “Luckily with my height I can cover you, but you’re going to have to make it look like you’re grabbing onto me. Most people are startled and embarrassed if they catch a pretty heated pda session. I’m going to bet they won’t stick around to find out afterwards.”

He nods his understanding.

“I’m going to put my knee slightly between your legs, okay?” You keep your voice low.

“Okay.” Yeosang replies, somewhat breathlessly.

Any second now.

“Grab the back of my neck with your left hand, and angle your face towards mine. Put your right on the back of my waist. Slip it lower if you think it’ll be more believable.” You instruct, giving him an impromptu lesson on stage kissing and angles. You may not actually be pressed against him, but it most certainly will look like you are, and that’s the most important part.

Instantly, his hands are on you, and you feel him pull you closer. Whether it’s subconscious or not, you don’t know. All you do know is that his right hand rests just above the curve of your ass, and your breath hitches slightly from his touch.

You squeeze your eyes shut, feeling your blood rushing through your veins as your anxiety continues to skyrocket. You just hope beyond everything that this works.

You hear the sound of feet hitting the pavement, and a sharp gasp followed by a loud exclamation of ‘oh my god!’.

Slowly, you turn your head to face the opening of the alleyway, seeing the two girls standing there. Red is clear on both of their faces as they splutter in their spots, shifting their gazes everywhere around the alleyway but at you.

Your eyes narrow, irritation shining on your features as you glare at the two girls for ‘interrupting’ you.

“What?” Your voice is nothing short of sharp as you finally speak.

The two girls remain silent, attempting to stutter out an answer.

“Do you mind? I haven’t seen him in two months, and I’d really love to spend some time with my boyfriend.” You snap, a prominent frown on your features.

“We’re so sorry!” The one girl immediately bows to you, quite clumsily. “We just thought-“

“What? You thought what?” You cut her off, shifting slightly so your head is turned more towards her while your body still covers the majority of Yeosang’s.

You can feel his grip tighten over you, but you choose to ignore it for now.

“We thought he was Kang Yeosang from Ateez.” The other girl replies, somewhat ashamedly.

“And that gives you the right to stalk us?” Your gaze narrows once more. You scoff. “Why would Kang Yeosang from Ateez be out at this time of day? Here, of all places? He’s probably at a schedule or something. He is an idol, after all.”

That’s when you realize: these girls don’t recognize you. For that, you’re grateful.

They remain quiet.

“You hear that, babe?” You purposely turn back to Yeosang. “These girls think you look like an idol! I told you you were handsome! I don’t want to hear another doubt about yourself come out of your mouth again.”

The way you’re leaning into him makes it look like you’ve placed another kiss onto his cheek. Yet, only you and he know that your lips never grace his skin.

“We’re sorry for interrupting.” The first girl bows clumsily to you again, shoving her friend back the way they came.

“I told you it wasn’t Yeosang!” You can hear the one friend harshly whisper to the other.

“You were right.” You hear the other sigh. “Besides, he wouldn’t be caught dead with an ugly bitch like that, anyways.”

The moment you hear their voices fade away into the distance, their footsteps no longer resounding against the pavement, you’re breathing a sigh of relief. A light smile paints your features as you turn back to face Yeosang, immediately moving to step away from him.

Only, the feeling of his hands tightening around you has you clearing your throat, seemingly snapping him out of whatever daze he seems to be in.

“You can let go now.” You mumble lowly.

“Oh.” Immediately, his hands retract, as if burned. “Right. Sorry.”

You notice Yeosang shifting slightly back and forth on his feet, a frown soon marring his brow as he looks down at the ground.

“Thanks for trusting me,” you smile at him, rummaging around in your purse for that pack of tissues he gave you that one day at rehearsal. “I’m so sorry for invading your space like that and subjecting you to be my fake boyfriend just now. I swear to you I wasn’t just doing that to cop a feel, or say you’re my boyfriend, or anything weird or creepy like that.”

“It’s alright.” He smiles assuringly at you. “I didn’t mind at all.”

Heat immediately rises to your cheeks from his words, handing him a few tissues so he can wipe the lipstick from his face.

“I’m just glad it worked.” You breathe a low sigh of relief.

“Me too.” He smiles, rubbing at his cheek with a tissue.

Still, he swears that he can feel the tips of his fingers tingling from where they had just been pressed against your skin. His heart absolutely pounds in his chest, and he can’t seem to erase the feeling of your body barely pressed against his. Really, he wouldn’t have minded if you actually touched him, but then again, he thinks he probably wouldn’t be able to stand right now if that had been the case.

“So,” your voice catches his attention, a light smile painting your face as you adjust the strap of your purse over your shoulder, “You hungry?”

[broodwolf221]

I love your writing and meta so much and have burned through most of your fic already, so I trust your judgment! Do you have fic recs I should check out? Thanks in advance!

oh no i cry 😭 pls this is so sweet.....

gotta start with the recent gift i got from arlathan exchange bc it is soooo good! sweater has a gorgeous, vivid writing style that i really enjoy. this one is spicy! 🔥but seriously her writing is just So Good? i love the way they set scene and tone

hunger by @fadedsweater / sweaterghost on ao3

In the moonlit dark of Mythal's palace there is a hunger that rumbles beneath the sprawling marble floors and shakes the foundation of each gilded pillar. It is a hunger that spreads like smoke and burns like fire. Solas has known this hunger for a long, long time. Solas visits Mythal’s court, intent to sway her from her current warpath. Meanwhile, Mythal can't help but notice that he has gone far too long without feeding. Ancient Arlathan, but with vampires.

my friend jazz has been getting into da and they've written so much lovely stuff for it, always with really excellent characterization and fascinating premises. one of my personal favs from their writing is this exploration of cole and vivienne's relationship

wellspring by @jazzmckay / desiredemon on ao3

Long ago, Cole promised, "I can protect you. If templars come for you, I will kill them." Vivienne never expected such a thing to ever take place.

i still need to finish this one and this is a nice reminder to get on that, but this writer has an extraordinary style and their handling of solas is so good?? i'm in awe tbh. seriously beautiful writing.

though my language is dead (still the shapes fill my head) by @darethshirl / mafalda_157 on ao3

She gazed up at him, silent and calm, green eyes unblinking. Outwardly she was the very image of tranquility, her expression as unmoving as the surface of a vast clear lake. If any thoughts or emotions lurked somewhere in those depths there was no way to tell. - This veiled world will always feel muted. Still, Solas tries his best to communicate.

another spicy one, but playwithdinos has suchhhh a vivid style and there's just something so lovely and profound about it. my first introduction to her writing is this one, and her depiction of solas is fascinating i love it.

the switch by @playwithdinos / @dinoswrites / playswithdinos on ao3

Lavellan usually lets Solas take charge when they're alone, but she's back from slaying the Fereldan Frostback and she's not in the mood to bow to anyone. Fill for this kink meme prompt: http://dragonage-kink.livejournal.com/13696.html?thread=53207680

anddd another spicy one (anyone else sensing a theme here?), this writer is... wow. wish i knew their tumblr if they have one so they can know i'm gushing about them beyond my comment. this is a delightfully messy and complex examination of how solas/andruil/ghilan'nain might happen, and i'm absolutely enthralled by the characterization of andruil and ghilan'nain here - and solas as well!

Power, Intrigue, Danger and Sex by Hezjena on ao3

When Solas later recalled the evening, he liked to imagine it was the result of careful manipulation, a triumph of his skilled diplomacy and a delicious trickery where he allowed himself to be underestimated… rather than the result of too much ice wine and morbid curiosity. *** That time Solas accidentally-on-purpose has a threesome with Andruil and Ghilan’nain in Ancient Elvhenan.

okay, rosie's writing is So Good? i'm always super impressed by how she describes scenes and also just... the layers. seriously. the foreshadowing is always amazing. her handling of solas is sooo good and also? an extraordinary artist? too powerful tbh <3

In the Blue Morning by @rosieofcorona / rosieofcorona on ao3

He wants to stay like this forever, wants the sun to forget to rise, wants the castle to sleep and sleep in an endless dream. But the light keeps coming, every moment. The castle will wake, and they will see. And this will cost them, in the end.

i could so easily keep going tbh but this is already getting long and i might've passed the @'ing limit already lmao