#I usually don’t look up guides but I didn’t want to replay the game so soon if I was locked out of the three main endings

[dobercorgis]

Maybe I shouldn’t have chosen neutral route

[sevenmothz]

finished rebirth and just like with remake i am left confused and wanting lmao

the glitch-up for aerith’s death was so weird and anti-climatic and then the fight following it was so weird and anti-climatic bahahaha. multiverse fuckery always be crazy.

also the sephiroth reborn fight was Heinous since my dumbass didn’t fully equip yuffie, barret, and red with more elemental materia, so taking out his stupid wings took so much longer than needed. plus that attack he does after that takes everyone down to 1 HP killed me like 2 or 3 times. Dx like damn bitch i’m playing on easy why you doing me like this?

anyway, other than getting burnt out on the mini-games (sorry game devs, i just don’t like most mini-games in general), i did generally enjoy rebirth. unfortunately, it came out while i was very preoccupied with writing an unrelated fanfic, so i just didn’t give this game the attention i usually would. v.v;

maybe once i’m finished writing i’ll give rebirth a replay (hopefully the bugged sidequest i can’t finish will be patched by then and there will be plenty of guides for hard mode).

looking forward to the final game in the trilogy! looking forward to my boy cloud hitting rockbottom and properly losing his mcfuckin mind. xD

now off to find videos on the other dates you can have at the gold saucer because i’m too impatient to replay chapters 8 and 12 myself bahaha.

[paellaplease]

HAII!! if it hasnt been done yet, could you do revali x reader with basorexia? maybe reader really wants to give him a kiss but she really cant since,, yknow she has lips and he has a fuckin beak so she just decides to give him a lil smooch on the cheek? idk that was just an idea i had in mind, u dont have to write it!

22. basorexia - the overwhelming desire to kiss.

pairing: revali x reader summary:  revali spirits you away to enjoy the new years eve festivities.

   In the darkness of your room, you awoke to the sound of a soft tapping on your window. Twisting in the mess of blankets and pillows, you pushed aside the papers and textbooks that had accumulated at the foot of the bed, noticing only then that the candle at your desk had long since extinguished. 

Head pounding, you rubbed at your tired eyes, feeling heavy. How long had you been asleep?

The tapping grew more insistent, forcing you to get up. Grumbling, you allowed yourself a second to stretch, ignoring how your room felt like water sloshing in a glass. 

"Yeah, yeah. Hold on!" You said, hobbling to the window. Brushing the mess of hair from your eyes, you pulled the curtains away and roughly pushed it open. 

The culprit hovered outside, eyes bright and smug. Revali looked very much at home though he was floating at a dizzying distance away from the ground. In the sleepy haze, he looked like a painting of some myth you had read before, with the late night sky as his backdrop and the outline of your window as his frame. 

"Took you long enough."

"Apologies. I thought some tree branches were hitting the glass." 

The Rito made a show of turning in the air. "Funny, I don't see any nearby trees."

"I know," you sighed, disappointed. 

Revali rolled his eyes and poked his head through the window, feathers brushing past your cheek as he ignored your personal space in favour of scoping out your room. The stiff turn of his neck as he looked around reminded you of the curious and confused little birds that landed on the sill from time to time. 

"Quite a dreary home you have here." Gesturing to the overall darkness, he pointed to your stack of scattered papers. "You shouldn't study without proper lighting, it's bad for your eyes." 

"I was asleep."

"Why, I'm surprised. And here I thought you were one of the festive many who choose to stay awake at an ungodly hour in order to count down the remaining seconds of the year."

"Well," you shrugged, not wanting to meet his eyes. "Not like it's anything special. New year, same shit. What difference would a countdown do?" 

Biting down on your tongue, you stopped yourself from saying anymore. The cold breeze sifted past the light shirt you were wearing, making you shiver. 

He was right, normally you were one of those people who stayed up, excitedly watching the hands of the clocktower tick til they reached midnight. You enjoyed the energy of being in a collective crowd, waiting with bated breath for the first inhale and exhale you would take into the brand new year.

The final month on the Hylian calendar brought a sense of relief and a hope for new beginnings. Usually today of all days  you were at your happiest, jumping at the prospect of celebrating along with the rest of the kingdom and yet…

That sinking weight clawed at your chest again, forcing you to clamp down on it once more.

You grimaced. There it was; that bitter feeling. Hylia. How annoying. It twisted in your brain like an angry snake, pulling down your mood and enthusiasm along with it. 

Last year you wanted to cheer and dance until the morning light. Now all you felt like was staring at the wall. Or falling asleep. 

You blinked, turning back to the window to see Revali patiently waiting for you to continue. Feeling your face warm, you hustled your brain to get a move on. A coherent thought would be great right about…now!

"Hey have you ever wondered why they don't grow trees on this side of the castle? It's not fair the more expensive quarters get all the pretty greenery. I mean, non-noble guests still need that sweet oxygen everyone keeps raving about, you get me?" Shut up brain, that's enough. I said a coherent thought. C o h e r e n t. 

Stars in his wings, Revali shook his head but answered anyway. "I agree, it's hardly fair. Also go change into something warm, we need to get you outside."

"What? Why?"

Something in the Rito's expression clued you in to the fact that he wasn't in the mood to play stupid. You've been sitting in the dark for the past few days and it didn't take a private investigator to know it was playing tricks with your head. "Fine, but when I say we go back--we go back, got it?"

He huffed, turning around to give you some privacy. "I promise on my honour."

The brightly lit lanterns of the town square made you squint as you shuffled closer to your guide, the sound of the city loud in your ears.

Though less prominent, the twisting feeling in your gut continued, making you more hyper-alert than usual to the world around you. Adjusting the sleeves of your coat, you followed Revali past the streets, the Rito expertly navigating through the sea of people. 

Somewhere along the way he had taken your hand, and you told yourself it was a good way for you both to stick together. Wouldn't want you getting lost and spending the final minutes of the year playing an elaborate game of hide and seek after all. He was a great friend like that. Nevermind that everytime you would hold his wing a little tighter to remind yourself that he was there, he would always squeeze back. 

You needed a distraction. 

Just focus on everything that's not him.

The night was alive with the sound of music. It didn't matter if you partied with an alcoholic drink in hand, or a glass of milk, everyone in Hyrule was filled with an addictive buzz that came with an event that only happened once a year. Vendors with bright smiles called out from their stalls, the smell of freshly baked sweets or the sizzle of a barbecue beckoning you to take a closer look. To your left, a group of friends raised their hands in the air, loudly welcoming a Goron that had turned up late but regardless had finally arrived. 

The archer followed your line of sight, guessing the question bouncing in your head. "Daruk is in Eldin, probably rattling Death Mountain with that story again about the Moblin camp and the barrel of explosives."

"I love that story."

"Of course you would."

"Sorry about your feathers though."

"Whatever, they grew back."

"How about the one's on your--"

"Anyway," he interjected quickly, playfully nudging you to the side and glowering at your laughter. "We've been told to 'take a break'. The other Champions have chosen to spend this day with their families and loved ones. We are planning to regroup and continue preparations in the days following."

"How about you?"

"I already said it."

Your cheeks coloured at the implications of his words, mind replaying the previous sentence. Families and loved ones. Families and loved ones. He didn't even hesitate. You both were not related. So that left you with...

"Woah!" Digging your heels into the dirt, you abruptly paused your brisk walk and saved yourself from colliding with the archer's back. 

Stopping at one of the stalls, Revali held two fingers up. You glanced up at him questioningly but he refused to give anything away, expression relaxed. The vendor returned quickly, the Rito thanking them quietly and placing the payment on the bright yellow table cloth along with a large tip in their jar. 

He turned around, dropping a square shaped pastry into your hands. It was some kind of rice cake, with a fluffy exterior and a golden baked surface that smelled of butter and felt warm like the sun. 

Taking a bite, you smiled at the hints of coconut that were hidden in its sweet flavour. The sticky treat was familiar somehow. "Is this so luck sticks to you in the new year?"

Revali scoffed, though failed to hide his own smile behind the cake held in his wing. "You said the same thing when we first met. You need new material."

"Says the baron of bird puns."

"I am the king." He punctuated the statement by biting into his own rice cake. Offering his wing, he gently took your hand once more, turning back to step again into the busy promenade. 

Following him, you noticed that the crowds ever so slowly began to thin. A lantern lit hill was coming up. The grassy expanse was dotted with a few people, though it was blessingly not as populous as the town square. "I should be the one that's surprised. Thought you hated crowds unless their attentions were all on you."

"It's tolerable so long as I am with good company." 

The both of you walked up the hill with an unspoken agreement to make it to the top. Taking a seat on the grass, you allowed yourself to breathe, chest heaving from the small burst of exercise after days of being sedentary. 

The twinkling lights of Castle Town stretched out before you. Gazing at it, you could imagine all the untold stories hidden in the glowing little pockets of the alleys and in the hushed whispers behind closed doors. Funny how in a city so full of people, one can feel so alone. 

Revali was the first to speak, breaking you from your thoughts. "I think I can understand now. Looking at it from this distance, it really can feel like nothing much has changed."

You continued to stare at the lights, trying to focus on a certain string in an attempt to ground yourself. "Yeah. Sometimes it feels like though the world continues to spin, I'm remaining completely still. Just stagnant."

Frowning, you ran your hands through the grass, feeling the dirt shift under your fingers. You could feel your frustrations building, bubbling up to the surface with no way of dragging them back down. 

"And the challenges just get worse every year. How am I going to face those old problems and these new ones if I'm still the same lost person I was back then?"

Your voice echoed at the last sentence, making you hide your head in embarrassment. That was loud. 

Some strangers relaxing on the hill turned around to flash you an annoyed glare, before quickly returning to their picnics after spotting the Great Eagle Bow on your friend's back. 

 "I'm so sorry." You wanted more than anything then to dig a hole and hibernate preferrably for the next hundred years or so. "I'm yelling, that isn't like me. I'm so so--"

"There's nothing to be sorry about. You needed to say it." He glanced at you from the corner of his eye. There was a serious element to it that made it a little hard to breathe. "There is one part of that I don't agree with, however."

"What is it?"

"That entire section about you, how did you put it, stagnanting." He twisted a wing in the air, thinking on his words before pointing a feather directly at your face. "You're fully capable of enacting the change you want to see in yourself."

You felt a little dizzy now. But another kind of dizzy, one very different from the vertigo you felt waking up in the darkness of your room. 

"And who said you were exactly the same as you were back then? You've changed. In a good way. You're stronger and more capable of things I'm sure the person you were two years ago or even less couldn't even fathom doing." 

Turning to face you, Revali gave you his full attention, compelling you to do the same as the cadence of his speech joined the steady rhythm of your own beating heart. From the back of your mind, you could barely register the sound of people gathering together, their voices floating into the cold night air. 

'Ten!'

"It's difficult to see your own progress from a distance."

'Nine!'

"So take my advice and start looking at yourself up close for once."

'Eight!'

He had that expression on his face, one that said he was thinking too hard about something. It was like watching him try to pull the planets together with just a piece of string. His brows were furrowed so deep that your fingers wished to run over his feathers and smoothe the worried creases. 

'Seven!'

You slowly reached out to him, giving him enough time to back away. Revali stilled as your hands traced up the nape of his neck, leaning in as his pulse thrummed underneath the soft pads of your fingertips. 

'Six!'

He opened his beak the moment you reached his face. You paused, half expecting him to tell you to let go and pretend like it never happened. 

Instead, he called out your name. 

'Five!'

He said your name again, though quieter now. It was enough to tug at the invisible force drawing you two together. Enough so that the polite distance nervously enforced by the both of you gradually began to dissipate, trailing away like a ribbon of smoke as you both leaned in closer.

'Four!'

"May I--," He cleared his throat, eyes darting away for a second before they were back on you again. Bright green in the lantern light. Emeralds in the desert sand. 

'Three!'

"May I kiss you?"

"Yes."

'Two!'

"Your way or mine?" You couldn't help but joke. Revali smiled, exhaling a soft joyful laugh before pressing his forehead to yours. 

'One!'

'Happy New Year!'

An earth-shaking boom rattled your ears, but all you could think of in that moment was Revali and the feel of his feathers against your skin; the utter elation of being so close to someone you deeply cared for and that cared just as deeply for you. 

In the dazzling light you lifted your head from his, both your eyes meeting for a brief moment. Hands moving, you gently angled his face with a steady hand, feeling then the soft, butterfly light brush of his wings on your waist.

Closing your eyes again, you leaned in to press your lips against his beak, the blush on your face warmer than any fever or furnace. The Rito's soft sigh was barely audible as you trailed your kisses upwards, stopping at the red circle on his cheek. 

Revali laughed again as you turned his face to press a kiss to the identical red mark on the other side. "You're very thorough."

"You deserve it." You beamed. "And this is just the beginning, just you wait at the end of the countdown I'll--"

"Actually my dear," he grinned, pointing to the sky. 

"Huh?"

Above you were the vibrant colours of the firework display. It was beautiful and awe-inspiring, but a confirmation that you were definitely minutes in to the new year.

"Oh," you said, before shaking your head with a smile. "It's fine, we got 12 more months to prepare ourselves for the next one."

Revali nodded, pulling you closer so he could press your foreheads together again.

"Indeed," he grinned. "Now will you finish your sentence? What exactly were you going to do at the end of the countdown?"

fin. 

[hopeymchope]

Parascientific Escape: The sci-fi “escape room” visual novel-style series nobody talks about

I can’t help thinking that Parascientific Escape would probably have an active fandom somewhere on the Internet if it wasn’t TRAPPED ON THE 3DS ESHOP.

I mean, it’s an escape room-centric visual novel-style sci-fi Japanese game that is clearly inspired by Zero Escape and very anime in its style. There are endearing characters, including optimal waifus/husbandos, plus a gradual buildup of an interesting fictional world full of political intrigue, its own countries, its own companies, and of course... psychic powers. Because you can’t have a trilogy of Japanese visual novel-style games featuring escape room puzzles without mental powers, now can you?

But as I said... they’re trapped as download-only titles for the 3DS. That’s fucking brutal. 

Even so, there’s a pretty big 3DS/2DS user base still in existence. It’s not like they’ve never been translated or something, so at least we have the capability to play them. So if you look into them, what are you getting?

A basic overview: Parascientific Escape is a trilogy of anime-style games about solving escape room mysteries and tracking down evildoers via the use of psychic powers (obvious Zero Escape influences). There’s an overarching plot about a mysterious mastermind who believes it’s time for the recently emerged psychics of the world to take their place as the next evolution of humanity and get their own nation (obvious X-Men influences).

They don’t work very well as standalone stories; each story relies on information from the last one, culminating in a game that stars the protagonists of both parts 1 and 2 together as they finally unravel the motivations behind the events of the whole series and face off with the people behind everything. In addition, the escape room puzzles start out pretty easy in the first game build to be pretty frustratingly obtuse by the tail end of the third. And on top of all that, each game taken on its own only contains about 3-4 escape rooms. So when you bundle all three together, that’s when it all works as a single satisfying package. 

Don’t worry about burning a lot of cash to play the whole series, however. The three games are $5.00 US each on the 3DS eShop and are usually on sale for $2.50 each these days. I got the entire trilogy for $7.50 US!

So let’s break down the gameplay and setup in a little more detail. Don’t worry; I won’t give any spoilers that go beyond the first five minutes of any game in the series. The twists and turns are part of the fun here.

The first game is Parascientific Escape: Cruise in the Distant Seas. You play as  Hitomi Akeneno, a high school girl (because of course she’s a high-schooler) with the dual abilities of mild telekinesis and a type of clairvoyance that lets her peer past barriers or into the insides of objects. She finds herself trapped on a sinking cruise ship where some mastermind keeps systematically locking her into isolated sections while she’s trying desperately to escape. 

I really liked how you could look inside of an object with clairvoyance and then use her telekinesis to manipulate the various switches and levers within, gradually pulling some object you need out from within a maze. I also thought it was clever how the solution to a new escape roomight require you to backtrack to a previous escape room to investigate some object or area that wasn’t relevant to that previous room’s original puzzle. 

(One of the things I found most fascinating about this one is the ethical debate raised by Hitomi’s friend Chisono regarding how Hitomi got herself involved in all this. Chisono offers a perspective that is extremely unusual to see in most fiction. You can even say it’s pretty cold, but it’s not without having some merit to it. I don’t want to say too much about what I’m talking about, though; it’s better left as a surprise.)

The second title, Parascientific Escape: Gear Detective, almost seems standalone at first. You play as Kyosuke Ayana, a private detective and actual adult (!) who is 22 years old. A young woman shows up at his office and asks to hire him for protection. See, there’s a serial killer on the loose, and she believes she’s the next target.

We are swiftly told that Kyosuke was once in an accident that necessitated the replacement of his left arm and right eye. He volunteered to be a guinea pig for some very special prosthetics that granted him artificial psychic powers. As such, he now has “chronokinesis” — to the power to look back in time. However, he can only look back for five days, and he only has limited ability to move or manipulate the things he sees in the past. 

Naturally, Kyosuke’s investigation winds up trapping him within some escape rooms that require use of his unique abilities to solve. Some of the hints at the proper timestamps or exactly where you should be looking when you peer into the past are a little vague, though, which can cause momentary frustration. Because I like to always be making forward progress, I actually preferred Hitomi’s telekinesis/clairvoyance powers from the first game. Still, Hitomi had some pretty basic puzzles in her rooms. I can’t deny that these puzzles took more thought.

Outside of the escape rooms,  everything is undeniably a huge improvement. The first game presented strictly linear segments of storytelling between the rooms, but this one is more of an adventure game. You can choose where you go, select from a limited menu of things to do when you get there, and do all of it in any order you like. There’s usually a correct sequence order to progressing the story, but it’s typically pretty clear what the next step is, so it’s not like you’re just flailing about and trying a bunch of locations blindly. Besides, there’s no way to get stuck, so don’t stress it. There are even a lot of actions you can take that have no impact on story progression at all — they’re just there to generate additional dialogue that further develops the characters. 

The tradeoff is that you actually get fewer escape rooms overall. The first game had four, but the second only contains three. This is also the first game in the series to introduce multiple endings; you get a number of dialogue choices throughout, and unfortunately, it’s far too easy to trigger the “bad” ending. There are guides online to help you trigger the Gold Star “true” ending, however. Just hit up GameFAQs. You might want to use the guide on your first playthrough, because I can say from experience that it’s annoying to have to replay all the dialogue sections just to make the correct choices. (Luckily, you can skip over any irrelevant sections of each chapter — including the escape room puzzles.) 

In spite of my above whining, the second one is probably my single favorite story in the Parascientific trilogy. It’s a lot of fun.

The final game in the trilogy is Parascientific Escape: Crossing at the Farthest Horizon. Mysterious characters who were plotting offscreen for the previous two games are finally given faces, locations that were talked about extensively in both are finally visited, and the two protagonists of the first couple games finally meet and team up. It’s absolutely a culmination of what they set up in the first two.

The narrative jumps around from the perspectives of many different characters, but the most time is undoubtedly spent with Hitomi and Kyosuke. Sadly, there is no gameplay usage of Hitomi’s powers this time; the escape rooms are all done with Kyosuke, and they are more devious now than ever before. Personally, I found the next-to-last one to be incredibly obtuse and frustrating. I ultimately had to consult a video playthrough on YouTube for that. (The YouTuber in question didn’t seem to have the same issues figuring things out that I did. So I guess your mileage may vary.)

The “adventure game” segments make a return here as well, although they’ve also become a bit tougher to figure out. There are a couple of times when you might find yourself wandering the various location options, clicking on every possible action to try and progress. Luckily, there aren’t so many default options that you’re left flailing for very long. Even the longest period of clueless wandering lasted me a maximum of 15 minutes.

Once again, you have to make the correct dialogue choices if you want a positive ending. And once again, GameFAQs is your friend and co-pilot.

Ultimately, even the gated endings and occasional puzzle frustrations did little to curb my enthusiasm. I really had fun with these characters and their stories, I greatly enjoyed the majority of the escape rooms, and I was pretty satisfied with how it all wrapped up. The character designs/artwork get better and better as the series goes on. The selection of music tracks may be the same throughout the whole series, but I really dug on them, so I can’t complain. Do I have any other misgivings? Well, just one; the English localization is pretty sloppy. There are a pretty large number of typos, and the dialogue can sound stilted and awkward at times due to being a direct translation. It’s actually at its worst at the start of the first game. Luckily, after about 30 minutes of playtime, it settles in and finds its voice.

Seriously, they should really figure out a way to re-package these games for another system that doesn’t use the the dual-screen setup. Put all three of them together, and it’d easily be satisfying as a full retail release!

But for now, if you have a 3DS/2DS, they’re only $7.50 in total most of the time (and $15.00 at the worst). Do you like adventure game-style mysteries and visual novel-esque progression and, of course, escape rooms? You should give these a shot! And I hope these devs get to make games with bigger budgets and better localizations in the future.

[jensungf]

𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 ∞ 𝐩.𝐣𝐬

summary: park jisung was supposed to be more than a passing cloud, than a fleeting moment. 

pairing: reader + park jisung ft. childhood friend!mark genre: high school!au, angst, fluff, some comedy too cus dreamies are funny af word count: 7.7k warnings: language, mentions of nausea

author’s note: i’m super happy to announce that i hit my first follower milestone!! thank you to the 100+ precious people who decided to follow my horrid blog, i really appreciate each and everyone one of you and i hope you enjoy this story to celebrate!

this is a sequel to my story passing clouds so please check that out first before you read this.

Jisung felt sick to his stomach. Like the time Donghyuck had somehow managed to convince him, or more so, drag him against his will onto that horrid Viking ride that day they went to the theme park together. Jisung had clutched onto the bars for dear life, and he could’ve sworn that his stomach flipped-flopped inside out and back again, with his life flashing before his eyes, all while his friends laughed at his misery. But now, along with the deja vu in the form of nausea churning in his stomach; he felt as if his chest was being constricted from the unbearable weight of guilt that was consuming his body. The gloomy skies thundered outside, as if the heavens above were laughing at his misery. As if they were chanting a mantra, reminding him that he fucked up as his head replayed the words you had sobbed just mere moments ago. He should’ve known it was a bad idea then — yet only after facing the pit in his stomach and the echoes of your cries did he know how ditching you was in fact, an irreversible mistake that might’ve cost him more than just his friendship with you.

He clenched his fists, knuckles turning white from the iron-grip on his phone as his arms fell limply to his side. What had he done?

Jaemin spoke first, as the boys all quieted down from their gaming soon after witnessing the conversation. “What the hell did you do, Jisung?”

Jisung winced. Jaemin rarely swore around him, much less directly at him. He knew he fucked up, and his friends could see the defeat in his eyes. The tension in the air thickened as Jisung’s mouth parched, unable to find the right words that could give a single reasonable explanation as to why he chose to do what he did.

“I fucked up,” he croaked plainly, running his hand hurriedly through his hair. “I hurt (Y/N).”

Jaemin’s hand balled up as he narrowed his eyes. He cared for you a lot — all the boys did. They loved you like their own sister. Jaemin’s expression softened at the sight of the youngest’s agony but he remained stern. “What did you do, Jisung?”

“(Y/N) and I.. we were supposed to go to the movies together today. But I never showed up.” Jisung’s knees felt like giving out. “I didn’t think she would actually be that upset that I didn’t show up! I-I thought she would just call someone else to watch it with her, or something. I didn’t she would blow up at me...”

“How could you not expect her to blow up at you when you literally stood her up?” Jaemin furrowed his eyebrows in disbelief. Jisung bit his lip in reluctance and the other boys frowned. Jisung was usually rational, and thought about his actions before he did anything. They didn’t understand what had led him to do this.

“Why did you flake on her?” Renjun asked quietly. Jisung averted his eyes, looking down at the floor. “I don’t know. I just felt like it.”

Donghyuck scoffed, “That’s such bullshit and you know it.”

Chenle’s frown deepened. Seeing his closest friend trying to deflect the truth was so unusual. He tried to piece it together, hitting the nail on the head with a simple question.

“Don’t you like her?”

Jisung’s heart twisted into knots. “What? O-Of course I do, she’s my friend.”

“No, of course you like her Jisung, we all do. I’m asking if you like her.”

A pause hung in the air as they all patiently waited for his answer (despite the obvious.)

“Y-Yeah. I do. I like her so much, guys. And I freaking messed up.” He confessed, choking up as tears prickled his eyes. “I was scared. We planned this last week while we were studying, and I thought she was joking about it being a movie date but she was actually serious and kept bringing it up.”

“That’s a good thing though, isn’t it? You could’ve made a move on her.” Donghyuck pointed out in slight disbelief.

“I know, but I got scared! I thought.. what if she didn’t like me back, and I was taking this the wrong way? I didn’t want to make the next step and embarrass myself when— if she rejected me. I knew it was childish of me to try and be cool and play it off, but… I don't know. I-I really just thought she could do better...” Jisung buried his head into his hands, his shame and insecurities washing over him. “Mark just came back into town too, and I always thought he was a better match for her than me.”

He sucked in his breath, lips quivering. “I.. I told myself that if I just chickened out then she would replace me with him or something. So it didn’t matter if I went or not.”

“(Y/N) would never do that and you know that! It’s so obvious she likes you back,” Chenle couldn’t help but grow frustrated at how unreasonable Jisung was being with the whole situation. How could he possibly even think like that?

Jaemin inhales deeply, shaking his head in disapproval. “If you really liked her back, then you would’ve thought about how your actions would have affected her and how she would’ve reacted.”

Jisung lifts his head up, eyes bloodshot as tears drip down his face. “Guys, I fucked up. I hurt her feelings and—” His breath hitched, “S-she told me that I could go play whatever games I wanted as long as they weren’t with her! I didn’t mean to make her feel like she was just someone I used to pass time or she was a game!”

“Jisung, of course she would think that way! You can’t just mess around with her feelings like that. You ditched her without even giving her a plausible reason or heads up, and you argued with her and said that we mattered more than she did, even though we’re all friends!” Jaemin huffed exasperatedly.

He pauses to catch his breath, almost sobbing at this point. “I don’t know how to fix this. What if she never forgives me?”

“I’m so disappointed in you, Jisung. How do you expect her to forgive you?” Jaemin suddenly stands up, throwing his hands up in frustration.

Everyone’s eyes widened at Jaemin’s irritated tone. He rarely ever scolded Jisung, always showering the younger boy in love and affection. He even treated him like his little brother. Jisung's mouth hung agape at Jaemin’s harsh words. He knew he deserved it, but it stung even more coming from Jaemin.

Jaemin scowled before turning his back and storming out of the room. Everyone froze, stunned.

Jeno was the first to react. “I’ll go talk to him,” he said before stepping outside of the room.

The rest of the boys turned to Jisung who was flopped on the floor, his usually tall stature curling into a tiny ball like a small child. Chenle sighed before getting up to rub Jisung’s back comfortingly.

“You made a big mistake,” Renjun says bluntly from his spot.  

“But so does everyone. Everyone has their insecurities, Jisung. You’re still growing so you still have an opportunity to learn from them so you don’t make the same ones again. But it’s a fleeting opportunity so don’t take it for other’s kindness for granted. You owe her an apology, and if you’re sincere enough, she’ll at least hear you out. You know how (Y/N) is — she’s a very understanding person.”

Chenle and Donghyuck nod their head in agreement. “We’ve all made mistakes before. It’s a part of life.” Chenle adds.

Jisung weakly mumbles a thank you, wiping the tears from his swollen face. The boys all give him a pat on the back and a tight-lipped smile. As much as they agreed that what he did was wrong, he was still their brother. It was their job to be there for him, to support him and guide him along the path even if he made mistakes.

Jeno popped in from the doorway. “We’re going to go clean up for dinner. We’ll call you down when the food is ready.” The boys all begin to shuffle out, leaving Jisung alone with his thoughts.

He feels such agonizing frustration, but he knows that he has no one else to blame but himself. He was the sole reason you had been hurt. It was his fault, his actions, that caused you pain. At the sound of your sobs replaying through his head, he squeezes his eyes shut and clenches his hands so hard that his dull fingernails pierce the skin of his palms, leaving painful indents.

However, Jisung’s head snapped up as the door creaked open again. Jaemin's eyes softened as he took a seat next to Jisung.

“I’m sorry,“ Jisung mumbles, “I really hurt her even though I swear, I never meant to. You can be mad at me. I deserve it.”

Jaemin sighs before ruffling the younger’s head. “No, Jisung. I’m sorry for what I said.”

“I really care about both of you and I know you understand what you did was wrong. It really did hurt her, but she really likes you, you know. A lot more than you think.” Jaemin murmurs.

Jisung didn’t have the heart to tell Jaemin he didn’t actually know.

Although Jisung would always jokingly fight back against the older’s hugs when he would be the one initiating hugs and coddling him, this time, Jisung’s body relaxes as he lets the older boy wrap his arms around him.

“Thanks, Jaemin.” He sniffles. The older boy can only pull him in closer.

∞

He had a lot of work to do. Jisung sighs, leaning back in his chair before scribbling “Mission: Make it up to (Y/N)” on a piece of scratch paper. He scrutinized the blank page before groaning and crumpling it up in frustration.

Jisung facepalms the table with an astounding thud, earning a yelp from across him. “What the heck, Park Jisung! Are you trying to get a concussion?” Donghyuck screeched. The chocolate milk from his bowl of Fruity Pebbles cereal sloshes onto the surface of the table and into his lap.

“Sorry!” Jisung mutters. His older brother glares at him while furiously wiping his lap with napkins. “I just can’t think of how to get (Y/N) to forgive me. I suck at all this romantic gesture crap.”

Donghyuck wails, “Doesn’t mean you can just freaking slam your head into the table! What did the table ever do to you? Also now my favorite sweat-shorts are stained.”

Renjun walks by the kitchen and rolls his eyes in disgust. “First of all, who the hell eats fruity cereal with chocolate milk— you heathen. You deserved it.”

Donghyuck flicks his middle finger at Renjun’s back as Chenle bursts out in his iconic dolphin laughter.

“Jisung, if you get a concussion in this kitchen or break the table with that empty skull of yours, Jaemin is going to break your skull. And you know (Y/N) the best, don’t you? Use your remaining brain cells,” Renjun tutted with a pointed look.

Jisung nods but whispers something about there being only one brain cell in this whole damn house under his breath.

“Yeah, I know— ‘cause it belongs to me.”

Everyone simultaneously rolled their eyes at Renjun.

Jeno sits in front of the TV, fervently smashing buttons. His eyes never break away from the screen yet he manages to pipe up. “Why don’t you start by figuring out a list of what she likes?”

Jisung’s ears perk up at the suggestion. “That’s a great idea Jeno!” However, his excitement quickly turns into a huff of exasperation. “But (Y/N) likes so many things… Anime, ice cream, watching me dance, fangirling over —”

“Me, of course!” Hyuck singsongs with a cocky smirk.

The crumpled ball of paper smacks him dead in the nose. “Ow!”

“Wait, I know!” Jisung shouts enthusiastically as an idea pops into his head. The boys all turn to look at him. “She loves the cake from the bakery down the street!”

“Ah, Neo Bakery? The one with cherry bombs and puzzle piece cookies?” Jaemin asks.

Jisung nods, flashing his smile for the first time in days. “Yeah! Can we go right now? Please?”

“I don’t see why not,” Jaemin grins. All the boys shrug in agreement, and begin grabbing their jackets and shoes. Even Jeno leaves his game to join. But before they knew it, Jisung had dashed out the door, his sneakers barely on. “Meet you there!” He called out.

They all share a look and collectively sigh.

“He’s so whipped.”

“Yep.”

∞

By the time they had caught up to Jisung, they had found him standing in front of the quaint shoppe pacing back and forth like a lost child. Chenle shoulder-bumps him, causing him to stop in his tracks. “What the heck are you doing?”

“I didn’t want to go inside alone… It looks kind of empty,” He says sheepishly.

“Oh my god, you big baby, just go in and—” Donghyuck froze as the door he had pulled causes him to lurch forward. He tries to open the door again, but to no avail. It hadn’t budged.

Jisung runs up to the window, squishing his face against the cold glass to peer intently inside. It was empty.

“Guys,” Jeno whistled. They whirl their head in his direction. Renjun holds up a paper with the words “CLOSED FOR RENOVATIONS UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE” emblazoned in bold letters across the page. “You have got to be kidding me,” Jisung bemoans, accidentally hitting his head against the glass window in the process. He winces and rubs his reddening forehead.

“Keep that up and you’re going to lose all your brain cells before you even get a chance to speak to (Y/N),” Chenle snorts. Jisung’s nose scrunches up at his best friends and he turns to face everyone else. “Now what am I going to do?” He whines.

“I mean, are there any other places that she’d like?” asked Renjun.

Jisung shakes his head. “No, just that place. She really likes their strawberry cream cake.”

Jaemin wrinkles his nose at the mention of strawberry before he exclaims, “Ah! I got it!” A mischievous glint appears in his eyes. “Jeno, don’t you have Doyoung’s number?” Jeno stares at him quizzically before letting out a sound of realization and nodding. He quickly gets out his phone and scrolls until he finds the right contact while everyone else’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “We’re going to go to the supermarket now, let’s go Jisungie.” Jaemin beams proudly.

“What are you talking about? The supermarket? For what?”

“I got it!” Jeno announces, grinning before shoving his phone into Jisung’s ginormous hands. Jisung fumbles with it for a bit, earning a glare from Jeno. He gives an apologetic grin before looking down to read the screen.

“Woah, what? How’d you get the recipe!?” He exclaimed. Jeno shrugs yet doesn’t bother to hide his eye-smile. “I’m friends with Doyoung. He works there part-time as one of the bakers and he owes me a favor.”

“Wait, are we going to the supermarket to buy all the ingredients?” Jisung parrots bewilderedly. Chenle rolls his eyes and smacks his best friend upside the head, “Yes, you idiot. Now can we go? I’m starving too.”

Jisung’s smile ear to ear as they all make their way down the street. He was so lucky to have them.

∞

After a chaotic trip to the supermarket which had resulted in Renjun chasing down Hyuck in attempt to murder the cheeky boy for yet again trying to steal  his order of pork cutlet “by accident,” and Chenle trying to find his favorite Chinese ramen in the wrong aisle for a good 20 minutes, they had managed to get back home in one piece without getting kicked out by the manager again. (Everyone had blamed it on Jisung for accidentally knocking over the entire tower of cans on one of the tables, but he thought it was a stupid idea to even display cans in such a fashion. It wasn’t like it was one of Renjun’s weird art competitions or whatever.)

With the help of Jaemin and Jeno who both surprisingly had not fallen into the chaos, they had successfully checked off their shopping list.

“Now, we should measure out the ingredients first and then add it in so it makes it a lot quicker and easier,” Jaemin chastises as he puts on his apron. He turned around only to be met with the sight of Jisung coughing in the midst of a cloud of dust, desperately trying to wipe the cake flour that he had accidentally spilled everywhere off his black shirt.

“Park Jisung, I banned you from the goddamn kitchen for a reason but please, for the sake of (Y/N), get it together!”

Jaemin facepalmed. This was going to be a long ass ride afternoon.

∞

Cake was probably the most difficult thing Jisung has ever attempted to make in his life.“Why is this so hard? It’s just cake!” He stares at the gloppy mixture in front of him, lifting up the whisk only to be met with the sight of chunks of things he wasn’t even sure belonged in a cake.

First, it was the struggle with just simply washing strawberries. Jaemin had looked away for a single second and nearly went haywire when he saw what the younger boy was about to do.

Jisung had moved the strawberries into a bowl in the sink, running water and had just grabbed the container of green liquid when—

“Nooooooo! No!” screeched Jaemin. He smacked Jisung on the leg and scolded him with an incredulous look. “You don’t wash strawberries with dish soap, you idiot! Are you crazy!?”

Jisung shot him a puzzled look. “Wait, you don’t?”

With the self-restraint of every fiber in his body, Jaemin forced himself  to not strangle the other boy.

Then it was this. Jaemin should’ve known it was a horrible idea to try and even think about letting Jisung do this alone, but the boy had begged about about how he needed to prove himself to you and he needed all the credit. He pinched the bridge of his nose and left to go drag someone else in to help.

Jisung was perpetually frozen in his spot, his jaw still hung open. His brain was short-circuiting at this point. If he had followed all the instructions, how did it end up like this?

“You both are idiots,” Renjun shook his head, glaring at Jaemin who had dragged him away in the middle of a Moomin marathon and Jisung who was still blinking confusedly at the whisk in his hand.

“Please, Injunnie,” Jaemin pleaded, pouting with his lips puckered out and puppy-dog eyes. “Do it for (Y/N) and Jisung! We’re all counting on you!“

“Agh, fine.” Renjun rolled his eyes before going through the recipe once again.

“Oi, Park Jisung! Snap out of it!”  

“Huh, wha—?”

Renjun grabbed the whisk from him. He stares at the horrific mixture of what was definitely not cake batter and wrinkles his nose in disgust. “What the hell did you do?” He demands.

Jisung gives him a blank stare. Renjun examines the ingredients on the table and nearly faints.

“Jisung, this recipe says baking powder, not baking soda. And it says cake flour, you blockhead, not bread flour! Why do we even have bread flour!?”

“Actually, it’s because of Hyuck’s carb obsession,” Jaemin answers.

He immediately holds Renjun back from running off to fight the mentioned boy.

Jisung chortled, “Renjun, you’re the best!“

Renjun cuts him off by locking the taller boy in a loving chokehold and laughs. “Yeah, yeah, I know. Now help me would ya?”

∞

After about five hours of continuous screaming and threats of burning down the kitchen or someone’s hair (which may or may not be all by the hands of Renjun), they managed to successfully bake the cake. Jisung collapses on the couch besides his friends, finally giving his strained muscles a break from the hardcore struggle of baking. “Who knew baking was this hard?” Donghyuck teases the tired trio on the couch. Chenle laughs in delight at their suffering, and they all shoot him a dirty look. While they rest, Jeno begins cleaning the mess in the kitchen. “It looks like a goddamn tornado flew in here,” He mutters.

“My poor kitchen,” Jaemin weeps. He turns his head to pinch Jisung’s cheeks, “Ahhhh, the things I do for you and true love, my precious Jisungie.”

Jisung groans and slaps his hand away. Donghyuck and Chenle begin helping Jeno clean the mess as well. Just as they finish, the timer for the oven goes off.

Jisung sighs before getting up. “I’ll get it.” In his exhausted daze, he opens the oven and reaches out for the hot pan before —

“Ow, fuck!” He swears, retracting his now throbbing hand. “Language!” Jaemin scolds from his seat. Chenle rushes over, inspecting his hand. “Dude, are you okay?”

Jisung winces at the pain and mumbles, “I forgot the mitt.”

Jeno walks over and chides, “Go run it under cool water.” Jaemin and Renjun turned their heads from the couch. “Are you okay, ‘Sung?” Jaemin asks worriedly. Jisung nods weakly in response.

“We have burn salve, and I’ll help you bandage it afterwards,” Jeno grabs the burn salve from the cabinet and gently applies the salve to Jisung’s hand, who flinches even with the light pressure. “Chenle, can you get the cake?“ Jeno asks.

“I got it,” he reassures, skillfully taking the cake out with a mitt and closing the oven.

“Thanks,” Jisung then frowns at the white bandage wrapped around his palm. Y/N is probably going to freak if she sees this, he thinks to himself.

Despite the pain from his throbbing hand, the boys worked together to finish decorating the cake and celebrated by enjoying some of it as well. Surprisingly despite their clumsiness, it had turned out almost identical to the one from the bakery and didn’t taste bad at all. Now all Jisung had to do was just wait until he saw you tomorrow.

As he laid there in bed that night, he felt the gaping hole in his chest that had been masked by his chaotic day. He was missing something in his life the past couple of days. A hole in the shape of you. He felt like kicking something suddenly. Like himself. How could be so foolish as to push you away because of his own insecurities? You didn’t deserve a fool like him. The lump in his throat grew.

He closed his eyes tightly that night and sent a silent prayer up into the sky before he slept. Please give me another chance to love her. To make her happy.

∞

To say that Jisung was nervous, would be a great understatement. His entire livelihood depended on this. Well, maybe not livelihood but still. He didn’t know what he would do if you didn’t at least hear him out. He had trouble sleeping last night, his doubts and worries consuming him. The boys hadn’t questioned him this morning when they saw the bags under his eyes, yet still voiced their concerns only to be brushed off with a weak smile. This was what he deserved. And now he had to do what he must in order to earn your forgiveness. He had carefully wrapped the slice of strawberry cream cake in a box, with a red bow on top. He was never really one who was good at expressing his emotions through words, much less cheesy romantic gestures like this but he had practiced his apology at least a hundred times in front of his mirror the past few days. All he had to do now was just simply tell you it. Face to face.

His stomach churned as the memory of your cries and bitter words surfaced again. He shook his head in order to try and rid himself of those thoughts, which Chenle had noticed. He gave an encouraging pat to his friend’s back and murmured a soft “Hey, it’ll be okay.”

Jisung’s face twisted in slight anguish. “I don’t know, Lele…” He sighed. “I’m really scared. I really don’t know what I’d do if she doesn’t forgive me. I don’t even know if I really deserve another chance after what I did and said.”

“Jisung, she loves you a lot and you love her too. It would be foolish to say that you’d never hurt her but you need to prove that you won’t ever try and do it again. Just try your best and know that if she hears how sincere you are and see that you’re trying to learn from your mistakes, then you shouldn’t take that for granted ever again.” Chenle reassures.

Jisung smiles sadly before a look of determination replaces it. “Thanks, Chenle. It means a lot.”

Chenle smiles. “Any time, bro.”

∞

By the time lunch rolled around, Jisung felt like a shit ton of bricks had hit him. Usually, he would’ve seen you in the morning but you were nowhere to be found. He hadn't seen you in the halls or anywhere else at all, and worry was eating him up. Where in the world were you?

He took a seat besides his friends who all shot him a look of concern. “What’s wrong now?” Donghyuck questions gently. He hated seeing his youngest brother down in the dumps and although it was supposed to be resolved today, Jisung only looked more worn out.

“I haven't seen her at all today. Do you think she’s purposefully avoiding me?” Jisung feels his heart breaking even more at the possibility that you hated him to the point where you wouldn’t even want to see his face. His head drops in remorse.

“I don’t know,” Hyuck begrudgingly admits, “But don’t you have class with her?”

“Just some. But she was absent today. Usually I see her between classes as well and I haven’t seen her at all. What if she’s sick or she’s skipping class just to avoid me?”

“I doubt (Y/N) would ever skip class just for that reason… but you should just wait until class,” Renjun suggests. Jisung nods in disappointment, his expression resembling one of a kicked puppy. The boys exchange a look of pity and they eat their lunch quietly.

They could only hope for the best.

∞

Jisung mopes for the remainder of the day, feeling nothing but pure despair for his current situation. By the time the last class rolled around, he had basically given up on even seeing you today or even ever again for that matter. He stares at the dainty bag he prepared for you in deep regret before a familiar figure passes by him. (Y/N)?

His head snaps up so quickly he’s sure he almost gave himself whiplash.

It was you. You were here. You were here!

Relief washes throughout his body. His eyes followed you as you walked to your seat, yet he feels his body tense when you don’t even bother to glance back. You hadn’t spared him a single look since you had gotten to your desk but you could feel his stare burn holes into the back of your head. You didn’t actually know since you hadn’t looked at him since before this weekend but you had a gut feeling.

Still, you were stubborn and refused to turn around and give that jerk the satisfaction of attaining your precious attention.

It wasn’t fair of him to do that when he was the one who had hurt you. He was the one who had promised you his time, yet ended up treating you as if you were disposable — something he’d throw away once he had something better to do. You weren’t his priority.

You had basically spent all weekend curled up in your room sobbing into Mark’s arms. He had picked you up from the movie theater that fateful day and consoled you until the wee hours of night, patiently listening to you rant and bawl your heart out over a stupid, stupid boy. You felt so guilty since he had just come back into town and instead of spending time catching up, he had kept you company as you binge-watched sad movies to wallow in your heartbreak over a certain idiot by the name of Park Jisung.

(“I’m sorry Mark,” you blubbered as you cling onto his figure. He sighed as he rubbed your back soothingly, hoping to calm down your tears. You mumbled into his tear-stained shirt, “I didn’t expect you to come back and for this to happen. I ruined your weekend, didn’t I?”

“Well.. you might’ve,” He said, causing you to immediately sit and look at him with watery eyes and quivering lips. You opened your mouth to cry out even more but he stopped you. “Wait—I was kidding. Sort of but not really.. but it’s okay (Y/N)! I just don’t want you to see you cry anymore.” Through your watery eyes and sniffles, you managed to smack him weakly against his chest. He gave you a tight-lipped smile before softly pulling you into his embrace, tracing circles into your back as you melted into his arms and lulled yourself into a deep, painless slumber.

Mark slowly moved his head to look down at your forlorn figure, a peaceful expression upon your features despite the fresh tears still dripping down your face. He gently wiped the tears from your face with the pad of his thumb, his heartbeat thumping so loudly that he worried it would wake you. He felt like his heart was tearing in half — from how painfully heartbroken you were, and how ironically sad this situation was. “I’ll always be here by your side,” Mark whispers to the air, knowing you had already drifted into dreamland. His heart ached. After all, he knew you would never see him the same way you saw Jisung. And he had to live with that.)

You had spent the next few nights with Mark, ugly crying yourself to sleep in his arms until the tears ran out. Asking the skies how could he could just cut you out of his life just like that? Drop you with the lame excuse that his friends were first. Did he not feel any remorse for what he did?

Stupid jerk. He didn’t deserve any more of my goddamn time or attention. No more shedding any tears. No more self-pity, you thought to yourself. You didn’t need Park Jisung in your life. You didn’t need to waste your breath holding onto what your friendship once was, what your feelings once were. You were sure of it. You had tried to convince yourself so, anyways.

You wanted to burn every trace of Park Jisung from your life, yet Mark had persuaded you not to, quietly murmuring about how you would regret it more than Jisung would soon regret his actions. You found that hard to believe but after all he had done to stay by your side, you relented to his wishes.

The time had dragged on by agonizingly slowly. It felt like Jisung was stuck in time for what felt like a million damn years. His anxiousness increased as the class went on. You were actually here! He wondered why you hadn’t showed up for your earlier classes but he thanked the heavens that at least you were here now. Yet he couldn’t help but feel more on edge.

He swallowed thickly, tapping his pencil annoyingly and fidgeting in his seat. His eyes paid more attention to the ticking of the hands of the clock than the boring teacher droning on and on about today’s lesson.

Finally, the bell rings signaling the end of class. Jisung jumps out of his desk and grabs his backpack in one hand and the bag in another, dashing outside like his life depended on it. You catch a glimpse of his escaping figure, and scowl. Did he really not want to be in the same space as you? Was it that painful for him to have you to be in his life? You felt a lump grow in your throat. A part of you had naively hoped that maybe, just maybe he would confront you and apologize. Not that you’d forgive him, or anything but… You bite your lip. He really dashed out the door just like that. You swallow the tears threatening to spill and trudge out of the room with a grim shadow cast upon your face.

You walk outside and begrudgingly scan the groups of students dispersing, searching for his face despite your internal protests. You couldn’t help it. However, by the time you reach the steps of the school, he’s nowhere to be found.

“You look like your cat just died.” You turn around to see Na Jaemin leaning against the brick wall with his signature sweet smile painted on his face. You pout and remember that he’s still Jisung’s friend. Your pout quickly turns into a scowl, and as if reading your mind — he kindly says, “I’m still your friend (Y/N). Nothing will ever change that.”

Your walls drop and he gently nudged your shoulder, cocking his head towards the doors so you both head out. “I hope Bongshik didn’t actually die, or else Jeno would be devastated,” Jaemin remarks. Your shoulders droop and you shake your head. As you walk with him, he takes a turn into the courtyard and you follow him despite the unfamiliar path.

“I know what happened between both of you,” he breathes airily. You wince at the mention of the fall-out. You hadn’t really wanted other people to know yet you guessed it was inevitable. “I know you probably hate him, but I know it’ll be okay. “

You remain quiet, unable to form a coherent sentence when your mind is constantly buzzing with thoughts of Jisung, bringing back the pain clawing inside your chest. You bite your lip. “How can you be so sure about that?” You mutter bitterly.

As you stare at the fallen cherry blossoms littered all across the pavement, you don’t realize that Jaemin had stopped. You freeze, and look up only to lock your gaze with the deep chocolate orbs of the one person you had been avoiding all day.

His eyes darted around your face searching for any telltale signs of how you felt — yet your face was only void of any emotions besides shock. Your jaw drops as you immediately turn to leave. “Wait, (Y/N), please! I’m sorry, please don’t leave— please! Just hear me out.”

You halt in your footsteps, cursing yourself for being foolish enough to even listen to him. Your heart betrayed your mind. You turned around and glared at Jaemin for even getting you in this situation — yet his eyes simply gazed with intent, almost lulling you towards Jisung again. He raises his eyebrows in anticipation and tilts his head towards the other boy. You sigh in resignation at his silent command and then turn around to fully face Jisung.

“What could you possibly say that would make me want to stay?”

“I’ll leave you two alone,” Jaemin says quietly before walking away. Your eyes widen as you realize that you would have to deal with this alone. You open your mouth to protest.

“Wait, (Y/N), please — I just need to tell you something and then you can decide whether or not I’m worth any more of your time,” Jisung interrupts, pleading with his entire soul.

Your eyes flicker to him.

He had never looked so broken.

“I thought I wasn’t worth any of your time,” You say quietly, remembering his harsh words from the other day.

Jisung’s expression drops yet he knows he can’t stay quiet anymore. “No, that’s not true,” He says firmly. “You’re worth all the time in the world.”

You can feel your heart beating out of your chest now, and wonder if he can hear it despite the mere steps that distance you away from one another.

Jisung’s nose scrunches up, and you want to laugh at his cute habit of wrinkling his nose in distaste whenever he’s disappointed that something doesn’t go his way, even despite the grave situation. He inhaled sharply before continuing. “I’m so so sorry for what I said the other day. It was the most hurtful thing I’ve ever said to anyone and I’m so disappointed in myself for hurting you. I never meant to.” He bites his lip and you stare at him. His hands fidget but remain behind his back.

“I-I like you, (Y/N). A lot. M-Maybe even love you but either way! It doesn’t excuse what I did. I shouldn’t have stood you up, but I was stupid, and foolish and the biggest idiot in the world because I was scared. When you first brought up going to the movies together, I was so happy. This is going to sound so damn cheesy and I hate cheesy, but my heart literally soared. I’m still surprised you didn’t notice how red I was,” He admitted.

You stared at him in shock. Park Jisung liked you. Even loved you. He loved you back.

“I didn’t shut up about it to the boys. But then I kept thinking. What if you didn’t mean it like an actual date and I was taking it the wrong way? I was honestly terrified. I didn’t want to ruin our friendship by making the next move even though everyone told me you felt the same way. I over thought it and then decided that I didn’t want to look like an idiot, so I had to be really chill about it in front of you, so I wouldn’t embarrass myself if you didn’t feel the same way. I didn’t want you to know how excited I was because I thought I would look desperate, or something.”

“I let my insecurities get the best of me and god, when I heard that Mark Lee was coming back, I literally felt like I had no chance. I mean, you’re the most amazing girl I’ve ever known and I mean it (Y/N). Y-You…,” He pauses and takes a breath, forcing himself to make eye contact with you. “You deserve the world and I really want to be the one to make you happy because it makes me so happy every time you laugh because of me tripping over air or you wake me up when I fall asleep during our study dates — I mean hangouts. And when I get to hold your hand and doodle all over your arms—” He rambles on. “I was dumb enough to take your time for granted and not consider your feelings. But I want to do better for you. I regret what I did and I want to turn back time to fix it, but I know I can’t so… I promise I won’t make this same mistake again.” His ears turn red and your heart can’t help but swell at his words, despite your mind’s screaming.

“But I didn’t think I was good enough or anything like Mark, who’s a lot funnier and older and smarter. I thought he would be better for you.” You want to open your mouth to protest but he continues.

“But I don’t want to be scared anymore! I don’t want to live life regretting what I did. You’re the most important person in my life (Y/N), and I know I hurt you a lot because I was scared to let you see all of me and tell you how I really felt, but I want to be better and learn from my mistakes. I don’t ever want to hurt you again and I can’t promise you I won’t, because I’m a big idiot who’s still growing, and I know I make a lot of mistakes... but I want to be your big idiot who will apologize and grow from them. I would do whatever it takes to make you happy as long as we’re happy together.”

You found yourself on a rollercoaster of emotions. You bite your lip, trying to hold back the growing smile and tears threatening to burst.

Taking your hesitation as a rejection, Jisung looks down dejectedly before revealing the bag in his hand. “H-Here,” he struggles to keep his voice from breaking, just like his heart, “I… wanted to buy you your favorite cake from Neo Bakery but it was closed so I tried to bake it myself… I know you don’t want anything to do with me anymore but please just take it. It’s for you.”

Your eyes widen as you also notice his bandaged hand and the way he winces when he grips the straps of the bag tighter. You put two and two together and take the bag. You set it delicately down on the ground before rushing to embrace him.

Jisung stumbles back a little but manages to catch his balance as you wrap your arms around him. “You stupid idiot,” you mumble into his shirt, tears welling up. “Look at how cliche this is. You know how much I hate cheesy cliches.”

Jisung stiffens before he relaxes his body to hug you back even tighter. “I can’t believe you burned yourself baking a cake for me. How dumb are you? And I can’t believe Jaemin let you in the kitchen in the first place.” You say incredulously.

He lets out a laugh at your response and strokes your hair gently. “I know,” he says softly as he closes his eyes and relishes in your warmth. You loosen your grip around his torso and step back to gaze up at him. “I can’t believe you at all. What you did really hurt me and I almost burned all your hoodies” Jisung’s eyes widened in horror at your statement. You snigger slightly. “But I didn’t. Thanks to Mark, by the way.”

“It’s okay to be insecure and have your doubts and I know we all make mistakes but please, don’t shut me out and leave me hanging like that next time. We’re friends and friends don’t do that to each other. I accept your apology — only because I know how hard you must’ve worked to bake the cake with your stupid noodle limbs and incompetent cooking skills.”

“Hey!” Jisung pouts at your words and you reach up to pinch his cheeks as you laugh. He melts at your touch and a gummy smile emerges. “But if you couldn’t tell, I really like you too. Maybe even love you,” You inhale at your own words and avert your eyes. “But if you want to make the next move then we have to work on conquering our fears… Together.” You admit earnestly, a look of determination in your eyes.

Jisung can’t help but grin even harder as his heartbeat skyrockets. Happiness overflows through every part of his body. “Thank God,” He says, pulling you in for another tight embrace. “I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.”

You both revel in each other’s arms for a while longer as the breeze gently blows against your figure. You look up at him, with the sunset shining upon his skin. His sparkling eyes gaze intently into yours before he leans down a little and your breath hitches. He pauses for a moment before his lips brush hesitantly against yours, and although you don’t feel fireworks erupt or an intense rush of euphoria, you know that this felt just right. Your noses barely brush against each other’s and your eyes flutter shut, feeling his lashes tickle lightly against your skin. He’s so glad your eyes are closed so you don’t see his cheeks dusted with a rosy pink. You slot your lips against his more, the awkwardness fading away, and tip toe to wrap your arms around his neck as he pulls you in deeper.

  He lets go first but smoothly slips his large hand into yours, fitting almost perfectly. His ears burn with embarrassment and you can feel yourself turn hot and blush fervently. Jisung scratches his neck trying to hide the fact that wow, for a kid who was considered shy — that really just happened.

“You’re not off the hook yet, Park Jisung! You still have a lot of groveling to do. Just because I love you doesn’t mean you’re forgiven, you big baby!” You announce to diffuse the awkwardness.

He smiles bashfully, “It’s okay. As long as I’m your big baby.” He leans down to grab the bag with his other hand and you blush even harder at the confidence brimming from his words. “Shall we go taste test my amazing cake?” He jokes.

You smack him and scoff, “There’s no damn way you were able to make this by yourself! Who helped you?”

He sticks his tongue out. “You’ll never figure it out.” You roll your eyes and laugh as you walk together, fingers still intertwined.

Maybe it was foolish of you to want to believe that Park Jisung wasn’t just simply a passing cloud or fleeting moment in your life. But you had hope. Hope that instead, he was the gentle breeze that tickled your nose and the warm sunshine that kissed your face on the warm summer days where you both had spent chasing each other until your lungs hurt. Or perhaps, his existence was embodied in the petals of the cherry blossom tree in the courtyard that bloomed every spring, carved with initials of young love that you had just ironically and cheesily enough, just experienced your first love underneath. You weren’t sure if Park Jisung’s existence was fleeting in itself or that the idea of forever actually existed, but you knew he himself was just there throughout every step of the way, and as much as the moments passed by and the memories faded, you could feel his love with the passing of every second.

And most importantly, you knew that Park Jisung still had your heart at the end of the day, and even if he dropped it, he would do everything in his power to put together the pieces even if it meant opening up a part of his heart that he had kept hidden away for so long and giving it to you. And at that moment, that was the only forever you needed.

author’s note: i sincerely hope you enjoyed this sequel hehe i worked really hard on this and it’s the longest story i’ve ever written! spoiler alert: there will be an epilogue/spin-off with mark in the making <33 please keep an eye out for that in the future hehe. special thanks to @neocitybynight @j-woosderland @gohyuck and @neostains for reading this beforehand!

taglist: @bumblebeenct @mjlkau @yongiefilms @neo-cultures @sugarsicheng @thenctaddict @soleilhyuck @ainabaina @heyy-sicheng @sunflowerhae

[oohfluffy]

TIHM Ch.19 | BBH

Group: EXO

Member: Byun Baekhyun

Theme: Angst | Fluff | Rated M | University!AU | Football!AU

Word Count: 3,310

chapter 19

You stared at him in disbelief.

"Kiss?"

Baekhyun tapped his cheek as if it would answer your incredulous question. You let out a chuckle, finding it silly that he would be this sly. You ignored the heat trying to spread across your cheeks.

"I think Mr. Byun could operate the piano without a kiss though—"

"You don't want to?" He mumbled as you looked at the piano keys, his eyes dimming while watching you tap on the surface. Actually, you already decided not to look at him as you find ways to drop the request— "I'd get it myself then. Excuse me."

"Excuse me?" You mumbled in confusion until—

Without any second wasted after he said that, you felt his warm lips on your cheek. His warmth seemed to transfer so much heat to your cheeks. Your eyes automatically widened at his action, and your whole body felt like it was too tense to move.

He even had the audacity to make a smooch sound as he pulled away from you.

"That would do for now, dear student." Baekhyun hummed happily as he moved closer to you. He enjoyed watching your blinking eyes as he started introducing the piano. "Let's start with the basics then."

You weren't even certain if you understood the things he said. The only thing that was on your mind was the replay of how his lips landed on yours before, and the one that landed on your cheek today.

What the hell.

"No, that's not how your fingers should spread out." Baekhyun huffed as he grabbed your hands before placing them gently on the keys. His slender ones guided your own, feeling the smoothness of your skin and your warmth. "Saejin-ah."

"O-Okay." You unconsciously responded as he looked back at you. You gulped while following his instructions. "I should get familiar with the keys, right? How do I do that? I suck at memorizing." You slightly frowned, now realizing how challenging it is to learn how to play an instrument.

Stupid.

"It will surely take time, but I'm here. I'll help you until you're as good as me." Baekhyun cheekily said with a grin. You chuckled at his incredulous claim, before blushing at his action. His fingers slowly intertwined with yours on top of the piano keys.

His hands are so pretty.

"Are they?" Baekhyun asked, surprising you. Your eyes went up to his, widening as he stared at his hand that was gently caressing yours. "It's not the first time I heard that, but it feels good when it comes from you." He smiled.

"D-Did I..." You inwardly cursed yourself as you cringed at what you directly said. Baekhyun laughed as he stole another kiss on your cheek. "Y-Yah!"

"You're too cute, I can't help it." His eyes crinkled as he gazed at you with a wide smile. "I like you so much."

That caught you off guard.

You opened your mouth to say something, but nothing came out. You blinked at him with blushing cheeks, trying to gain the control in the current situation. You almost said thank god when you heard the bell ringing, signalling the end of the lunch break.

"Ah, I still have a class this afternoon. I've got to go." You stood up quickly, grasping your bag that was on the floor. "You should attend your practice, okay? I heard that the last game before the break will be—"

"Let me drop you off—"

"No." You firmly said as you glared at him. You've been feeling guilty for keeping him away from his friends too much. Junmyeon will surely raise his eyebrows at you when he sees you around. "I'd be looking forward to your game, so do well." You smiled at him.

Baekhyun frowned as he tugged at your hand, pouting as he felt succumbing to your command. He feels so weak under your gaze along with your bright smile. How could he dare resist you?

"Hmm, alright." He whispered, moving closer to you while still sat on the piano bench. You were still standing with your bag on your side as he slid closely next to you. "I'll do my best then. Can't disappoint my princess."

MY PRINCESS? WHY IS THIS GUY SO SHAMELESS?

As if he wanted to prove more of his shamelessness, his arms snaked around your waist while he leaned his head on your stomach. He looks like a child clinging onto his mother. Your mouth gaped at his audacity.

"B-Byun Baekhyun!" You exclaimed with reddening cheeks, hands going on top of his head. Baekhyun just snuggled more onto you, finding your touch comforting rather than dismissive. "Y-Yah, I'll really—"

"I won't see you later, so I want to take some of your scent with me. I'll be more motivated in practice later." He mumbled, slowly peeking up to you with his cute grin. You couldn't even form an appropriate reply as his gaze turned too soft and full of adoration towards you. "I just want to stay like this forever."

His arms aren't restraining. His touch held you with so much gentleness and care that you didn't mind him snuggling against you for a long time. He craved for your warmth and touch.

You craved for his. You craved for him.

"Baekhyun-ah." Your hand slowly swept his grayish hair back, lightly scratching his scalp. He hummed in delight as his eyes fluttered softly, gazing at you. "I—"

"I told you, you should have bought the strawberry one instead!" A loud irritated voice said, breaking the mood between the two of you. You were too slow to comprehend what was happening, but Baekhyun doesn't seem to like how the sudden noise interrupted you.

"Fuck." Baekhyun cursed so loud that the noise coming from the door halted. Your eyes widened as a few students came out behind the piano. They seemed to be coming back from lunch break. 

The break is over! I need to run, damn it!

"Ah shit." You cursed short after Baekhyun did, making him look back at you. You took your bag again and quickly tapped his arms that are around you. "I've got to go. Do well later, hmm?" You smiled at him as he slowly moved back. He just nodded, his lips pursed.

You took a swift look at the faces of the students, and got enough of their expressions. Some were plainly surprised, but most were as you expected. You looked away after slightly greeting them.

Most of them were seniors, so they probably recognized me.

You shook the thought away as you went out of the room with a sigh.

As soon as the door closed, the room was filled with silence. Baekhyun's bright expression fell as he felt the bench against his hand. Getting the atmosphere surrounding the senior, the students silently made their actions as quick as possible. They mumbled to themselves as they prepared for their class.

"Didn't you see the lights on earlier?"

Their movements seemed to stop as they heard him speak in a firm voice. They looked at each other in wonder. Baekhyun pressed a low key all of a sudden, making them shudder in surprise.

"Isn't it common courtesy to see if someone was occupying the room before barging in?" He mumbled, eyes dimming as he looked up at them. "Didn't I say so before?"

He chuckled darkly, seeing how they bit their lips in guilt. His lips turned into a fine line as quick as they lifted in a second.

"And I don't really like how you spoke about her in your whispers."

—

"I feel like I haven't seen you for so long, Jin-ah!"

You rolled your eyes at your friend's loud complaint as you entered your apartment. Jiwon was already cooking her midnight snack when you got home from work. You smiled at the smell of ramyeon as you placed your bag down on the couch.

"You've been busy with the cheerleading practices as well, right?" You said while trudging towards the fridge to get a bottle of water. "Whenever I get here, you're already sound asleep. Why the sudden snack?" You chuckled as she frowned at you.

"Speaking of practice, I got to see Baekhyun earlier in the field. You must have let him go today, right? Junmyeon was always all over the place whenever he's not there."

"I don't decide that for him, you know."

"Oh, you do. You have that strong hold of him." Jiwon wiggled her eyebrows as she looked at you with a smirk on her pretty face. "Don't even try to deny it."

It's not like I can stop him from going with me...

You felt yourself shaking your head.

You totally can. You just want him there too.

"Take it easy, Jin-ah." You looked back at Jiwon with a surprised expression, finding her voice more serious than usual. "I don't really want to taint Byun's image in your eyes, but it's really going to be tough to be by his side. I saw how girls around me tried to stay, but..." She shook her head in dismay as she turned off the stove. "...it's scary."

"Are you talking about the jealousy of the other girls? I know they can be a little bit dangerous and bold to hurt me—"

"A little bit?" Jiwon let out a huff as she fully turned her body to you. "Byun Baekhyun may be one of the most sought for men in the campus, but his power is beyond the gates of the university. These girls might be enchanted by his looks and influence, but some are aiming for his power."

Power?

"I only heard he is an heir to their company. Is it that big?" You pursed your lips as you leaned back on the counter. "Why would that be—"

"Aish, you don't get it." Jiwon scratched the back of her head as she took the pot on the counter. "He's the dangerous one, Saejin-ah. The girls can go through such lengths to gain his favor, and that might harm you in the process since you are currently the one he's after. I don't know what he would do if..."

Your gaze fell to your hands as Jiwon trailed off her statement.

Ah... almost forgot who I am in other people's eyes.

Your image was still of a murderer, someone who was responsible for a person's death.

If Baekhyun knew that he's been hanging around someone like that, you wondered what will become of you. Will you still be able to graduate with honors? Live like a normal individual?

Should I plan for an escape route? Where would I go if he does hunt me down?

"No one really knows about Byun Baekhyun, other than his close friends, EXO. He might be showing a façade of a very playful man, but we don't know who he is on the other side." Jiwon shrugged her shoulders as she carefully twirled the noodles around her chopsticks. "Just keep your eyes open. I know you can decide on your own. You're smarter than me."

You almost couldn't feel your lips as you've been placing so much pressure on them through your teeth. Taking a deep breath, you shook your head.

I've been letting my guard down for a long time around him. How can I trust him so much? Stupid.

"I understand your worry, Jiwon-ah. I appreciate it." You said with a forced smile, making her stop chomping on her snack. Of course, she knew it was fake. "But I think it's too late to back out now."

It is.

"D-Don't tell me..." Jiwon gaped as she stood up in shock, eyes widening while she followed your movements. "...you've fallen?"

You let out the longest and deepest sigh that you've ever let out as you sat on the seat across Jiwon. She sat back down in haste as she tapped the table impatiently.

"W-When did this happen?"

"I don't know, Jiwon-ah." You looked at the pot in front of your with a pained look. "I just...forget who I am whenever I'm with him. I forgot that he could be like those people who would laugh and ridicule me behind my back. I forgot that..."

...he might be not like I deemed him to be.

Seeing how your tone lowered, Jiwon felt her heart tightening at the thought of you being sad all over again. You finally found someone to dedicate your heart to after years, and now she's shattering that chance. She grasped onto her chopsticks tighter as she spoke.

"T-There's just a little possibility that he may be better than we think, Saejin-ah. Maybe he's serious about you. I mean, if he truly likes you, wouldn't he accept all of you including your sorrows from the past?"

A little possibility.

"Should I risk it?" You mumbled. "For that little possibility?"

Jiwon bit her lower lip as you looked at her in the eye.

"If ordinary people can't accept me fully, how can someone like him do so?" You let out a pained chuckle as you leaned on your chair. "I think I've been too careless. Jiwon-ah, what should I do?" Your voice stuttered while your eyes filled with tears.

"Is falling for him a mistake?"

With your unanswered question, the night ended in coldness and gloom.

—

As you silently read your book, you were unconsciously letting out lots of sighs that the table beside yours kept on looking back at you in irritation.

The library was quiet as usual, who would dare make a sound with a librarian as strict as the principal, and it was your second haven aside from the music department. It's quite obvious why you chose to be here on your break.

You're still afraid to face him with your feelings all over your face.

"After so many months to realize this, why just now, Lee Saejin?" You grunted as you furiously wrote a note on your book. "You sure you're a dean's lister? You—"

"What did that book do to you, baby?"

"A—"

Before you could shriek, a smooth hand covered your mouth to save you from both the embarrassment and punishment from the librarian. Baekhyun swiftly sat beside your seat, silently giggling at your expression.

You felt yourself getting pale from the current situation.

"B-Baekhyun?" You whispered as you looked around the area. There are a few students hanging around, but none dared to look back. Your gaze went back to him, and found him already looking at your notes with his mischievous eyes. "Why are you here?"

"Didn't see you there."

There. It sounded like it's your common place already. You knew in an instant where 'there' was.

You gripped on your book tighter in tension, while he browsed through your notes. He was speaking loudly, in contrast to your whispering voice.

Doesn't he know we're in the library?

"Your handwriting is pretty, and everything's organized too." Baekhyun hummed as he smiled at your notebook. One would pay to be that lifeless notebook.

"Shouldn't you be eating your lunch? You have practice—"

"What about you? Have you eaten? You have work later too." He smoothly fired back his own questions at you while still gazing at your notes. You're not certain if you prefer him looking at you or at your notes.

Your heart's still beating so fast either way, just with his presence.

"I-I already did." You looked down at your lap, remembering why you're here.

You're supposed to be settling with your feelings alone, Saejin. Why are you keeping him here?

"Baekhyun, you should—"

"I missed you."

His fingers stopped browsing through your notes as he spoke. The mischievous glint in his eyes faded as he glanced at your face. You refrained from looking directly at his eyes, finding it hard to resist.

Why resist more when you've already fallen hard?

"Why do you have such a sullen expression, Saejin-ah? I don't like it." Baekhyun mumbled as he moved his seat closer to yours. You flinched at the sound of the chair scraping against the floor. The librarian would surely kill you both. "Did someone make you sad, hmm?"

You shook your head weakly as his hand gently caressed your cheek.

So weak.

"Tell me." His eyebrows scrunched in worry as he watched your lips part. His heart quivered at the sight of your eyes dimming. He bit his lip, uncertain of what he should say next to make you feel better but you beat him to it.

"I'm fine, Baekhyun-ah." You smiled as you nodded, patting his hand that was on your cheek. "I think you haven't eaten lunch yet. Let's go?" You placed your materials back in your bag, letting Baekhyun bring the thicker books as he insisted.

"Seriously, tell me if something or someone is bothering you, okay?" He pouted as he took your other hand in his. You looked down at your intertwined hands, while Baekhyun spoke. "I won't go easy on them."

Your lips curled into a smile as usual.

You looked up at him and said, "Alright, alright, Mr. Byun. I'll tell you."

Jiwon-ah, that little possibility...

Baekhyun grinned before leaning towards you. You welcomed him this time, making his eyes widen for a moment. You tiptoed a bit to reach him, and placed a swift kiss on his lips.

"W-Woah." He gaped as you chuckled. You tugged him like a puppy on a leash, while he stared at your back in amazement. "A-Amazing. What just happened? D-Did I just feel your lips on mine?"

"Dunno." You shrugged your shoulders with a giggle. Baekhyun blinked his eyes as he watched you smiling in front of him. "You probably daydreamed for a sec."

Before you could even move a step to walk around a corner, your vision blurred towards him. You felt his arms snaking around you as if they've found their prey. Your cheeks blushed as you felt his chest thumping against yours.

"You're the only one allowed to tease me like that, Jin-ah." He whispered as he pulled you closer. "I'm very very—"

With all the courage and face you have at the moment, you grabbed his neck with both hands and pulled his head down. You met with his warm lips as you closed your eyes, feeling him all over you.

...I think I'd give it a go.

Baekhyun's response was instant, as if he has been waiting for this moment all his life. His lips moved on their own as he let you lead him in a battle that he was willing to surrender on. He smiled against your lips as he felt the trembling of your knees. As if teasing you more, his tongue went out to seek for your own.

Holy sh—

Your cheeks are totally on fire as he gripped on your waist tighter while he does things to your mouth. You were running out of breath, but who the hell is complaining?!

Baekhyun must have felt you struggling as he slowly left your lips alone. Or not. His face still hovered over yours, lips pecking your cheeks, chin, and all over your face as you catch your breath.

Oh god. Did I just make out with Byun Baekhyun in broad daylight?! IN THE FREAKIN' HALLWAYS?!

"Oh my..." You let out an incredulous sigh as your eyes went behind Baekhyun. Although his broad shoulders covered most of the sight, you still saw that there were students around. "B-Baek!"

"Hmm." He hummed as he happily nuzzled his nose on your neck. "Hmm."

"G-Get off. Now." You tapped his shoulders where you slung your arms— "Oh shit. I can't believe this."

JIWON, I'M SORRY I WENT OVERBOARD!

"I'm so happy." Baekhyun mumbled on your skin as he gently pecked your neck. You could feel his smile, his skin bumping on your yours.

"So happy."

With your red cheeks, your arms went limp as your gaze softened at his voice. Your hands rubbed on his shoulders as if saying...

I am too.

—

MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE!

Tagging my loves: ❤

@nissybyun | @byuncock | @neogoturback​ | @jisungispilledmyuwus | @shesdreaminginoverdose | @precious-seungwooya | @junmyeonimissyou | @baekhyunsdangerouswoman | @jummyjammy​ | @itsbaekhyunsbutt | @lalalala-lav​ | @thoughtsofidk​ | @byuniieo | @feline-xiu | @banddits | @half-moon-x | @byunxo | @strawbaeri-s | @vishary15 | @hansolturnt | @jungkooksworld18 | @byunniebaekhyunnie | @kingkushdealer | @chloebarlin​ | @marovekian1 | @sehunnies-hunnie96 | @cam-peggio | @bbh-kji | @making-me-blush | @starrybbhx​ | @kpopseregi | @dobomiyeon | @lifewithsehun​

—

♫ Ch.20

[ladyc0312]

A Jikook Guide to RunBTS: 81-90

Jikook really seem to be feeling some kind of way in a lot of these episodes. Meanwhile, the Run editors (or whoever writes the on-screen text) are getting increasingly sassy and I am here for it! 

As usual, let me know if I’ve missed anything or should take another look at something. :)

Ep 81 “BTS VR Part 1" (Ep: 2 / KM: 3)

The ones where we are again reminded that watching people play arcade games doesn't make for the best TV (but at least the guys are having fun!)

2:49 - JM puts his arm around JK as teams are announced.

4:20 - When JM is joking around about being on a VR train, he directs his silliness at JK and they are the only two laughing.

4:54 - JK puts his hands on JM's back to guide him to the next room.

5:00 - JK says that Jimin loves things like this.

6:37 - JM directs his comment that he feels motion sick to JK. JK laughs and says it'll be fun.

7:50 - Jimin laughs delightedly as he watches JK act like he's controlling the skateboard in the VR.

16:23,17:07 - Some teleporting happens where JK and JM go from being on either side of RM to being right next to each other. 

17:55 - JM playfully shoves JK as he does a celebratory dance in the background.

19:56 - JM compliments JK's stable driving.

21:55 - After JM brags that he'll win everything, JK shoves his chest and they have a brief exchange with each other that is unsubtitled. 

28:51 - JM has his arm around JK again.

BEHIND

0:29 - JK puts his arm around JM (over V's arm).

3:08 - Jimin watches and jokes with JK as JK pretends he's controlling the VR experience that he's doing.

8:39 - JK and JM are joking around with each other until Hobi interrupts them to tell Jimin to get out of Suga's gamespace. 

Ep 82 "BTS VR Part 2" (Ep: 3 / KM: 3)

4:35 - Suga tries to get Jimin in on a plan to shove JK while he's doing the VR tower game, but JM declines, saying it wouldn't scare JK, anyway. He seems to be correct, as JK immediately starts playing around and JM ends up on the floor laughing at his antics.

7:59 - When Jimin is playing around with his height in the game, JK informs us that JM wants to be taller. 

13:53 - JM compliments how well JK is doing in the game 

19:44 - JK comes and leans over JM's shoulder to look at his controller.

20:59 - JK had moved away after V joined them, but returns to JM's shoulder once it's free again.

26:11 - JK has his arms around both V and JM when it's announced that they won.

BEHIND 

2:37 -  After JK says he's not good at the type of game coming up, JM briefly touches his back (in what I read as a comforting gesture, but I'm trying to to go overboard on editorializing...)

Ep 83 "Summer Outing Part 1" (Ep: 3, KM: 2)

The water park one where everyone is terrible at pool volleyball 

01:34 - Jimin directs his unheard query about the game they're playing to JK and then keeps looking in his direction despite JK not giving any answers.

2:12 - It's kind of adorable how funny JK finds Jimin's crow imitation.

2:33 - JM keeps his eye on JK when they're doing a hand flip game to decide teams and seems to be poised to change his answer depending on JK's.

12:04 - After hitting a good shot over the net, JK asks someone "did you see that?" Next time the camera returns to them, JM seems to have swum over to JK to congratulate him (to be fair to Jimin, JK did look really hot doing it with wet hair).

16:12 - JK and JM high five after working together to get the ball back over the net.

BEHIND 0:26 - Hobi tells JK that he has an extra earring - pointing to a large hoop earring JK has hanging off one of his hoops - and tells him to remove it because he doesn't like it. JK says, "but I like it."  Pointing this out because I've seen some jikookers speculate that JK is wearing one of JM's (as we see him do in Festa 2020). I think that's really cute, but I'm not sure it's accurate, as in Part 3 we see that JM has put all his earrings back in after all the water activities and JK still has the "extra" one.  But don’t worry... there’s some undeniable jewelry-sharing coming up later!

03:15 - JM and JK paddle around adorably together. The caption labels them "Puppykitty and Kookbunny" <3

34:44 - JM and JK, the only two who appear to be truly invested in the outcome of this game, strategize together.

5:15 - JK and JM cutely exchange the ball while paddling.

10:10 - JM and JK joke with each other about how fast the boat was. When JK says, "he didn't listen to me" (which is already a very BF statement), he uses banmal. 

11:42 - JK offers JM some food and then watches as JM lenas his head all the way back to eat the (phallic) food.

Ep. 84 "Summer Outing Part 2" (Ep: 3, KM: 2)

The water park one where JK is so much better than the others that they have to change the game so it’s JK vs everyone else

2:29 - JM seems to being trying to hold up JK on his back? No clue what they're aiming for, but both seem to be enjoying it. 

10:09 - When JK returns from his turn on the water slide, JM puts his towel around his neck.

BEHIND 0:28 - JM supports JK as he tries to fish a shoe out of the water

0:44 - JM watches JK do pushups and makes a joke about how the whole dock is going to sink because he's so heavy (meaning muscular, not fat). JM moves closer to him and the camera cuts off. 

5:41 - JK and JM lean in close to watch a replay of JM's jump and JK lightly makes fun of him. 

Ep 85 "Summer Outing Part 3" (Ep: 4 / KM: 2)

The water park one where everyone except JM and JH are terrible at giving gifts 

1:35 - JM proposes that, if JK wins the game, they call him "hyung" the rest of the day. JK looks surprised, but into it. 

16:52 - JM asks JK for one bite of ramyeon. JK gives him a bunch in his bowl and says "this is how much I care about you."

32:40 - This is the true jewelry sharing moment of these episodes! We see that, through dinner, JK had on two silver chain bracelets. After dinner (where they all drank and goofed around), one is missing. Jimin has on long sleeves, but here you can see up them as he's opening his present and, sure enough, JM is wearing JK's missing bracelet! I think it's made even more interesting by the fact that it seems like he was trying to not make it obvious he was wearing it - he had it pushed pretty high up his arm and covered by his sleeve - you really wouldn't notice it unless you were looking for it...

Ep 86 "Hangul Day Special Part 1" (Ep: 2 / KM: 0.5)

The ones where you have no hope of playing along, so just enjoy that the guys are incapable of not saying the word "okay" despite promising not to use any English all episode...

^^^ Not jikook-related, could I couldn't not include this screenshot of the drawing JK left behind on his whiteboard 

No moments in the episode itself. 

BEHIND 0:31 - JM writes something on his whiteboard that I can't make out and then he and JK exchange funny faces  

Ep 87 "Hangul Day Special Part 2" (Ep: 3 / KM: 1)

1:47 - JK puts his arm around JM's shoulders as he leans over him to see the map

BEHIND 0:42 - JK starts to hold JM's hand before doing the slate and then they joke around with each other

1:03 - Closer and longer shot of the above moment

Ep 88 "Hangul Day Special Part 3" (Ep: 3 / KM: 0.5)

No moments within the episode. 

Ep 89 "BTS Gayo Returns Part 1" (Ep: 5 / KM: 4)

The ones where BTS has fun playing games that have to do with their music. It may not sound like much, but this is the show at its best.    6:28 - Jimin makes up a rule that JK has to draw an extra card because he forgot the choreo. It doesn't sound like much from the description, but Jimin's tone and smile make it feel rather flirty.

7:00 - It takes JK until here to realize that Jimin doing the above skipped his turn. When he expresses this, JM gives him a finger heart.

9:20 - Jimin tries to convince JK not to switch the card color using the look and low voice he did back in the New Years episode. No luck.

26:54 - When Jimin is supposed to be acting out song lyrics, he barely starts acting before JK guess the lyrics correctly, causing the others to ask if it's telepathy. They're both super excited and hug adorably until JHope starts pulling on JM's arm to get them to cool it. Then, Jimin heads back to his chair and is laughing so hard he falls out of it. A concerned JK comes over to check on him and ends up falling on top of him. They're both still laughing as JK helps JM up.

BEHIND 6:04 - Jimin finds JK's shouting so funny he is on the floor laughing, which makes JK crack up too as the rest of the group looks on confused. JHope eventually cuts it off by seating Jimin next to JK.

7:03 - Another angle on the falling over moment.

8:08 - Between-set-ups moment where JK and JM discuss the "telepathy" moment and JM tells JK "you're awesome."

Ep 90 "BTS Gayo Returns Part 2" (Ep: 5 / KM: 3)

3:54 - When JK misses hearing what the right answer is, he looks right to Jimin to tell him.

7:20 - After JK gets super excited after what turns out to be a wrong answer from RM, Jimin teases him and does the flirty chest tap thing.

18:07 - JM and JK jokingly dance part of the Fake Love choreo around each other, with Jimin adding in tapping JK's chest.

25:33 - When they all rearrange their chairs, JK moves his close to JM. 

31:40 - When they're talking about memorable moments from this two-parter, JM brings up JK guessing the answer just from looking in his eyes 

BEHIND 5:04 - JK keeps watching JM dancing after the others have all stopped.

[tigerseye46]

Re: 'headcanons for Red Shark AU' every so often Sha Wujing will slip up and be reminded of a good memory of one of his 'former brothers' (usually because it's connected to a memory of Master and he just didn't cut it off at the right time in his head) and he always spends like a solid week pissed off about his own mind betraying him like that.

He would totally do this-

Send me a headcanon you have about the Red Sand/Shark au and I’ll make a fic out of it. Send as many as you want

———

It was no secret to those that used to know Sha Wujing that he loved Tripitaka. Anyone could see the longing looks he gave the monk when the other wasn’t looking, the way he brushed up against him and wanted to be near him all the time despite their duties. Sha Wujing was aware Tripitaka never felt the way, he was focused more on Sun Wukong and Zhu Bajie, fucking nuisances.

So he did the next best thing and pretended his master cared about him. He would just sit back, close his eyes and daydream about having his master’s attention on him and only him. He would pull memories from his brain, memories of just them and no one else.

Today, he was sitting back on his couch, perfectly still as he recalled a memory.

The two of them had just arrived at a village in the middle of celebrating a festival. They were both convinced they needed a break so to relax, they decided to explore a bit.

They stood side by side as they walked, surrounded by stalls that had a variety of snacks and prizes to be won. There were lanterns lit up that illuminated his master’s gorgeous appearance.

The monk had his hands tucked in his sleeves, smiling as the festival and while Sha Wujing thought the place was beautiful, nothing was more beautiful than his master. He kept his eyes on the other, marveling at his soft features and hoping he didn’t look like creep while doing so.

“Wujing,” his master said and Wujing’s eyes snapped back to the view in front so his master hadn’t noticed his staring.

“Yes, master?”

“What do you think of the festival? Are you enjoying yourself?” He asked with a bright smile, head tilted to gaze at the demon and wait for his answer.

He answered, “Yes, I am. It’s amazing. It’s nice to relax every once and awhile.”

“It is. I don’t think I’ve felt this relaxed in ages and I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself.”

“Why wouldn’t I, master?”

The monk rubbed the back of his neck. “Well I wasn’t sure I would make for good company.”

“Of course you do. You’re fantastic company.”

Tripitaka blushed at that. “I wouldn’t call my company fantastic but thank you.”

“It is. You know I don’t just say things like that. You’ve been great company since the journey.”

“Th-thanks,” he stuttered out. “You are too. Um... what should we do while we’re here?”

The demon tapped a finger against his chin. “We should get some food then maybe we could play something.”

Tripitaka wrapped his arm around the other’s arm, it felt like a light flutter. “Sounds good to me but maybe you just play the games. I’m not that athletic compared to you.”

“You don’t necessarily need to be. How about I help you after we eat?”

He bobbed his head and grinned. “I would like that. Now come on.”

The monk tugged on his arm and led him to various food stalls where they ate together before going to play games. Sha Wujing guided him as he was about to knock down a bunch of bottles, it felt rather romantic, something only couples would do. Tripitaka managed to knock down the bottles and win a fish puppet that he handed to Wujing.

Finally, they walked to a spot on the grass where the fireworks were about to start. They sat down next to each other, their hands almost touching.

“This was a great day,” Tripitaka said.

“Yes, it was.” He felt as if it he could stay like that forever. 

Tripitaka leaned against him and the demon’s heart leapt against his chest. “I wish things would be more like this.”

“Me too.”

They remained in silence, waiting for the show to start when they heard the crunching of the grass from behind. “Starting without us?” A voice yelled.

They turned to see Zhu Bajie, Sun Wukong and Bai Longma (in human form) go up to them. Zhu Bajie had an armful of food in his possessions while Sun Wukong had a tail around his waist. Wujing scoffed at that, the two didn’t seem to notice.

Tripitaka waved at them, his face brightened and jealousy shot through the demon but he ignored it. “Hey, you three! Come join us!”

They nodded and rested next to him. Sun Wukong beamed. “Having fun with master all to yourself, little brother?” Tripitaka appeared confused at that comment.

Noticing the monk’s confused look, he furrowed his brows and sarcastically replied, “Well it was fun without you, brother.”

“Oh, don’t be like that, little brother. You know I’m just teasing you because I love you.”

“I love-”

His eyes shot open and he scowled. He did not care or love that monkey, his former brother. Why did he let that continue onward for so long? It was his stupid mind’s fault. 

He clenched his fist. He went to his training room in an attempt to calm down but he couldn’t as his brain continued to betray him and replayed the scene. No, he did not care about that monkey.

He remained pissed for a week. When Red asked him why he was angrier than usual, he replied with “None of your business, kid. Let’s just train.” Maybe training with another person would rid him of the memory.

[shorkbrian]

Video Game

Prelude -  Hopefully I did chicken man justice. This was inspired by me playing Assassins Creed Odyessy (amazing game!!!!) and almost crying out of frustration because I had to fight a boss several times because I kept DYING like a little shrimp. Big F in the chat for my ego. 

Prompt - “You have no idea how amazing you are.”

Pairing - Hawks/Kiego Takami X Reader

Warnings - NSFW towards the end, grinding and groping. 

Music - https://youtu.be/VdwaWp59qz8 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Y/N! C’mere!”

You sighed.  Kiego really didn’t need to shout to get your attention, the two of you only in adjacent rooms. 

You were trying to water the few plants the winged man had gifted you, pinching off dead leaves and looking after them as best you could. You loved those plants. You loved them so much that given the chance, you would happily relocate them outside so they could grow, bloom, and flourish into the healthiest version of themselves. Instead they were stuck inside, as equally trapped as you were in Kiego’s spacious penthouse.  You knew despite your best efforts, the plants were doomed to a miserable existence, hidden away from sunlight and fresh air. Their roots had no where to go in the tiny containers except back into themselves, clawing, tearing, growing, destroying their insides in an attempt to survive.

“Dove? Don’t make me ask again!”

The irritation laced in Kiego’s voice was obvious as you heard him shout for you again. It would be nice - you thought distantly - if you could grow into yourself like a root, breaking and destroying everything before Kiego could get the chance.

The man had been playing some video game in the living room, and you could hear his occasional whoops of victory and tough-talk as he battled pixelated villains. He really reminded you of a child sometimes, with his selfish and irrational behavior towards you, his stubborn countenance; especially the way he would throw a fit if he didn’t get what he wanted. Right now? He wanted you to come see him, which wasn’t all that unusual when he was playing a game. Kiego always liked showing you a replay of him defeating a boss villain, Or pointing out how detailed and smooth the graphics were, often he wanted his “sweet little dove” to get him a glass of water.

The sharp note of anger you had heard hidden in his voice did make you somewhat nervous, rounding the corner into the living room with slight, timid hesitation. Keigo was sitting cross-legged on the couch, his controller thrown to the side, the TV screen showing that he had failed his mission or something. It was red and blaring and mocking the winged man, who had his head buried in his hands. As he heard you step closer (damn his enhanced hearing), his head shot up, those golden eyes fixing you with such a sharp, aggravated gaze that you froze immediately.

“Uh, Hey…..”

You offered awkwardly.  “Do you…….. do you need something?”\

Kiego patted the couch next to him, motioning for you to sit down. The harsh look in his eyes told you that he was in no mood for an argument, and refusing his request would end in copious amounts of pain for you. After gingerly settling yourself beside him, silence filled the space between the two of you as Kiego ran his hand through his hair, the muscles in his cheek and jaw flexing as his jaw worked in annoyance.

“Babe, you know how close I was to beating this quest?”

You almost flinched when he finally spoke, looking over to shake your head in answer. Kiego pulled his hand out of his hair, only to suddenly grab onto yours, painfully pulling you closer to him so he could stare down into your widened eyes. You tried to relax, even though it felt like he was trying to rip off your scalp.

“Seriously, so close! But then that stupid wraith had to mist me, ruined fucking everything! Doesn’t even make any sense-“

He inhaled sharply, cutting off his own sentence before grumbling about how unfair and rigged the game was.

“I’m sorry Kiego.” You managed to whisper, a hand coming up to clutch his wrist as he tugged you ever closer by your hair.

Noticing you wince, Kiego took pity on you, releasing his death grip on your strands so he could massage your stinging scalp. His other hand wrapped around your waist, subtly maneuvering you into his lap. You let him.

“Y’know what would make me feel better, Little Dove?”

His tone was deeper now; you could hear the frustration and annoyance slowly fading, although they failed to disappear completely. You knew where this was going, letting out a defeated sigh as Kiego began rubbing your hip gently, legs now unwillingly straddling his lap.

“I think it’d be nice-“ Both hands dropped to your butt, guiding and pulling you forward in a quick, rolling motion. “-if you gave me a nice little distraction and made me feel better, yeah?”

You tried not to visibly grimace as he began grinding roughly against you, burying his face in the crook of your neck to drench it in sloppy wet kisses. You knew his hormones would get the better of him at some point in the day like they usually did, causing him to bend you over the nearest surface to sate his lust. You had gotten used to his high libido by now, and you had learned that it was easier to let him use you however he liked. Whenever you had tried to fight against him and his predatory hands, the consequences were severe, leaving you crying and sore and shattered. 

He had broken you down into a pliant little doll at his beck and call, obeying like a dog at every command or passing whim he would come up with.

When had you become so empty, so detached and apathetic?

You would let Kiego pull you into his arms at night, let him kiss your hair and snuggle against you. You thanked him sweetly when he would bring you a gift, and when he had gotten you the first of your precious plants, you had voluntarily given the man a hug to show your gratitude. You followed his requests and suggestions, keeping his penthouse clean and organized, having amiable conversations when he initiated them, not pushing away his kisses and smothering hugs. At first it was because there was an underlying threat tacked on the end of each request -

“Have the house clean before I get back from my shift, ‘kay?” Or else.

“Little Dove, whatcha readin’? Tell me.” Or else. 

“Tell me how those little plants that I got for you are doing.” Or else.

“C’mon, let me hug you.” Or else.

“Hey Dove, gimme a kiss before I leave!” Or else.

But over time it had just become routine, your body and mind felt detached,  blankly going through the motions. Kiego would walk through the front door in search of you, stretching his arms wide when he caught sight of you, waiting for you to initiate a hug.

Was there even a shred left of the person you used to be?

A grinding thrust sharper than the others jostled you, pulling you out of introspection and back to the present. Kiego had detached himself from your neck, and was working your shirt off with one hand in a rush.

“Fuck, little dove, you have no idea how amazing you are.”

He breathed, giving up on removing your shirt and letting it tangle at your wrists. Clothed hips still rapidly humping against your own, Kiego moved to latch onto your skin, one hand guiding your hips, the other roughly groping at the soft tissue on your chest. You let him.

Kiego was making all sorts of noise, moaning and gasping out praise as his tongue laved and his hand squeezed at your chest. A weak cry tore out of you when he bit down, hard. 

‘Kiego! G-gentle Ple-! Please!” You stuttered out, purposefully ignoring his smile against your skin as your cheeks turned red at your breathy request. If you couldn’t make him stop, hopefully you could encourage him to treat you less roughly. Knowing Kiego, it was a slim chance. 

Another hard nip had you jerking in pain, gasping loudly as his lips kissed noisily over the bite mark. After he was satisfied with how much attention your chest had received, he pulled back so you could look at you; flushed, trembling slightly, your hair a mess. He was all smiles, his own cheeks ruddy and eyes dark with lust.

“Trust me little dove, I’m being gentle.”

A shaky breath escaped from your mouth. 

Tthis was probably going to hurt.

[needletail]

Nintendogs vs Nintendogs + Cats: a review and comparison.

There’s no doubt that most people want a new Nintendogs game for the Nintendo Switch. But when I see these posts, very few of them are referencing the 3ds variant of the game, but rather the original ds version that everyone continues to know and love.

The addition of cats is Nintendogs + Cats’ most notable feature. It was, while cute and fun for a short period of time, notably worse than its predecessor. But why is that? The formula stayed roughly the same, but the charm didn’t quite hit.

Before we dive into this: these are my opinions on the games, and personal comparisons. Every person experiences things differently, and will likely have different opinions.

We can start with breaking down the original Nintendogs. The graphics have not aged well, but the charm and entertainment factor have. While replaying, I found that the general ambience and the music used endeared me further to the game, and I wanted to play more. The half hour timer on going for walks was frustrating (as was the stamina system), but it otherwise engaged me more to figure out where I wanted to go. The map feels surprisingly big with so much to do, and the side-scrolling walk screen keeps the mystery alive in what you’ll encounter. The competitions were fun and the voice recognition system may have been even better than the 3ds incarnation. The only thing that really suffered were the graphics - but this game is 15 years old and this was advanced for its time, so we can let that slide. The dogs can be a little strange to look at at times, but they’re expressive and distinct, which is what matters in a pet simulator.

The information you can take in is optional, but an exciting part of the game for those who are interested. Your dog’s profile is detailed but easy to understand, going as far as to tell you what it ate last. There’s something so charming about it being displayed as if it were a document you had in front of you - it brings another element of immersion into this sim.

[Image ID: a photograph of the informational sheet on Nintendogs. It includes the name, gender, breed, trainer, time together, coat, hunger, thirst, and things eaten. The trick list and contest results are also on this screen.] 

From cars passing by to horns in the distance and dog barks from somewhere vaguely nearby, the sound design of Nintendogs is audibly aged, but still strong. The few tracks spread in the game are iconic, and stay in my head a lot longer than I’d like to admit. 

The competitions are another huge highlight of the original nintendogs. The banter between the hosts, Ted and Archie, is something that continues to be remembered. Everyone’s seen the line “you make me feel like a man, Archie”, and the banter they keep up in each competition is less like a mindless tapping chore and just more entertainment. The settings are surprisingly realistic - less so on the obedience, but the ring set up for agility certainly is. The balance between realism and fun is another part of why Nintendogs appealed to all audiences. 

Agility is my personal favourite event, and the same goes for a lot of people I’ve met. There’s a level of interactivity here that isn’t met by the successor (something we’ll touch on later). Guiding your dog over hurdles and through tunnels, and later having to balance speed with accuracy - it’s an event that keeps you, the player, engaged. It becomes a sort of fine art once you hit the Championship level, as your dog, by that point, is likely going to be very fast and have a mind of its own, often trying to predict which obstacles it’s going to go through. 

[Image ID: an angled photograph of the starter agility training course. The dog is laying on the green, and the hurdles and tunnels are in view.] 

Disc is in both versions, and is fun in its own way. I, personally, don’t tend to use the disc competition - in the original Nintendogs, the projectiles can be a little speedier than you intend them to be, and the dogs are a little too determined to hold onto their toys. But, with a well-trained dog, this event can be as fun as anything else. In the original, you didn’t have to contend with the other dogs - something that I’ve grown to appreciate over the years. But, like with the event that removed Agility, I’ll be looking at how the changes fared later. 

Obedience is held on a stage, and is a fun event for people who take the time to train their dogs. Your dog can typically learn three or four tricks a day (depending on the dog), and between the tricks listed in the Obedience Guide Book and the unlisted tricks that your dog can learn, you can usually blow the competition out of the park. It definitely requires the most time and effort out of all of the events, and it can be frustrating if your dog suddenly stops listening - but the rewards are surprisingly good. It’s always fun to have a well-trained Nintendog, if only because showing them off when I was a child was my favourite thing to do. 

Obviously, competitions are the main money-makers in these games. Tackle a solid few of them, and you’ll find yourself able to afford another dog or two. Though your room is limited to three dogs, there’s also a Hotel to keep some other dogs in. As time progresses and you gain more of a bond with your dog(s), you’ll unlock more breeds. 

Something that went over my head when I was a child was the method to unlock Jack Russells, specifically. You need to find an incredibly rare book - something which I don’t ever recall doing, and still haven’t. I found this information via the wikia, so I’m not too sure how accurate is, but it is an interesting breed to lock behind a time and patience-based method. 

[Image ID: an angled image of a German Shepherd laying on its side. In the corner is an idea bubble.] 

Overall, Nintendogs is a solid and fun pet simulator, and it’s clear why so many people have such good memories. The dogs are filled with personality (even being expressive enough to show you when they’re angry vs happy), the competitions are engaging, and though the format will become stale after playing daily for a long time, it’s always a fun game to come back to after a period of time. 

Which is why it’s unsurprisingly that it gained a sequel.

I remember being ecstatic when Nintendogs + Cats was shown in advertisements on television. When I got the 3ds, I also got a copy of Nintendogs + Cats. The Golden Retriever version, specifically, but I do own all three. For some reason? As people got bored with it, they usually gifted me them. 

At first blush, it’s almost as charming as the original. The graphics style handles much better than the original, with slightly more realistic movements, and less cardboard-y models. I much prefer the Nintendogs + Cats models to the originals, for obvious reasons - though their movements can be a little repetitive and strange at times, and a lot less expressive than the originals. But that said, I much prefer the Kennel system of petting and exploring the dogs and their behaviours (limited as they are) before you adopt, and I enjoy sorting through colours or getting unique colours/patterns. The rare white variants used to be my obsession, as a child. 

[Image ID: a german shepherd holding a present in Nintendogs + Cats. The model is significantly better than the original Nintendogs model.] 

Immediately, though, there’s a lot less ambience in Nintendogs + Cats. I play with my volume up all the way, and it’s typically just my dogs and cat making noises. I miss the cars going by and the general background noise that the game can provide. It feels just a little too silent, and the music tracks are repetitive and unmemorable for the most part. Obviously sound design don’t make or break the game, so I won’t harp on this point for too long. 

The gameplay is...fine? I’m not a fan of petting a shadow of my dog, but I understand they did that for 3D purposes (something which most people didn’t use, to the point that the 2DS was made. I play on a 2DS). The camera control is an incredibly nice feature to have, the showering minigame is a little more thorough. They didn’t really add anything to the care features, though. If anything, they took away a lot of experiences - reading the care books and instead guiding you through the tricks one by one instead of as you want, forcing you to learn a specific set of tricks before you can move on to the next ones. The game is far more hand-holdy, which can be frustrating at multiple points. But, hey. There’s cats! Let’s talk about the cats. 

What’s their purpose? Not much. Which is fine, although they take up a slot in your three-pet designation. As cute as the cats are, they definitely got done dirty. There’s three selections to choose from (Standard, Oriental, and Long-hair), with multiple colours, but not much depth beyond that. Obviously, the cats were just a cute addition - I do like having my little cat wandering around the house with my two dogs, and I know from past experiences that once you bond with the cat, it’ll go out and get presents for you if you leave your ds on. Gaining affection with the cats is very slow-going and if you’re someone who likes your pet simulations to be more interactive, it might be wiser to stick with the dogs. I’m not complaining against the addition of cats - it just could’ve been done much smoother, with better mechanics enabled. Be it adding some breeds and a proper grooming minigame to maintain them, or the ability to train them but have them be much harder than the dogs. There were many ways to put cats into the game, and I just don’t think they hit as intended. 

So, how did they do with the competitions? Well. 

The short answer: they’re pretty bland, and a downgrade from the original.  The long answer... 

[Image ID: a white cocker spaniel chewing on a banana lure.] 

In the competitions, there’s no more Ted/Archie banter. It’s just Ted. Doing his thing. I honestly do not read the text for this game, and instead tap quickly to progress to the events. 

Replacing Agility comes Lure Coursing. I’m not sure about other countries, but that’s an incredibly niche section of dog sporting here, and it’s also notorious for being...very boring. And in the game, it lives up to that. Instead of guiding your dog through obstacles, you wind the cog of a lure and honk it to get the dog to follow it. Sometimes you honk it to get them over hurdles. I have to admit, I usually space out when I’m training my dogs with this - it’s an easy moneymaker once you’ve trained them up to Nintendogs Cup level, but it’s easily the most mind-numbing event. Anything would’ve been better. If they didn’t want to implement Agility, there are other dog sports that could’ve suited well; guiding your dog through the Flyball course and using its name to bring it back until it could do it on command (maybe even utilising a team of three, for reason as to why you can have up to three dogs), or sledding, using your dog to pull a lightweight sled (on wheels) through a course in a race against other dogs (or, again, even using your trio). There could have even been scenting sport in which you teach your dog how to scent and go off to find a mark, or herding. The point is: lure coursing is the most unengaging thing to put in a game. 

The Disc competition barely changes, so I won’t say much. I don’t particularly enjoy having the other dogs in the ring to compete with as it becomes all too easy for them to interfere heavily with your own dog, but I understand why it was implemented and know that a lot of people enjoy it. I prefer the throwing speed and the control you can have over the disc, and will admit that overall, the Disc competition is generally improved. 

But then you come to the Obedience Trial. AR Cards are mandatory. You don’t have a surface to put your AR Cards on, or lost them years ago? Then you can’t do it. I actually ordered AR Cards, having thrown out my old ones due to damages and general...lack of use. As of this post, I have been unable to play the Obedience Trial, so I can’t say much on whether the system has improved. I do know that AR Cards can work on a laptop screen or something similar, but the 3ds camera is pretty horrible and can glitch out, making it unreliable for screen-based AR cards. Unfortunately. 

[Image ID: a white cocker spaniel standing on an AR Card.]

The walking system is fine. I love being able to go to different routes (as limited as they can be - but the original was no saint to repetitiveness once you knew the whole map), and I like having to go between grass patches, with a chance for a surprise present. I think the addition of the BARC stores are a cute touch, and the Miis walking their own dogs are cute, too. The interactions between your dog and theirs is based on your dog’s personality as well as theirs, which makes sense - but there’s basically three outcomes. More than the original, but meeting with other dogs tends to be to see if you can backtrack when you’re near the end of the walk by having them invite you to the cafe or park, or to get presents from Streetpass miis. I like the cone minigame to test your control over the dog and its leash, and as a rule, I just...like it. It’s relaxing. I don’t prefer it over the original, but I don’t prefer the original over it. They both have their benefits and downfalls. The biggest upside to + Cats’ system is that you can take your dog on as many walks as you want. 

Interactivity isn’t really a thing, with + Cats. Whereas in the original you could legitimately piss off your dog and it would bark and snarl at you for a while before you regained its trust, this game doesn’t punish you for much. I poked and prodded at my dog for a while, and it didn’t really do much for me. This is a game where you sort of just have cute looking models that hold up surprisingly well for their time, and that’s it. There’s not much game to the game, as it were - and that’s from a game where the gameplay was limited as it was. 

Adding multiple accessories to your pets is a very nice addition, albeit expected. Overall, though, the gameplay has been significantly dumbed down and while I understand that kids play it, my generation played Nintendogs as small children and we got by just fine. It’s a very intuitive game, and it’s almost insulting how little Nintendogs + Cats thinks of its audience. 

Another nice addition to Nintendogs + Cats, though, is body type for your pets. There’s a few that your pet can be: underfed, skinny, optimal, plump, and overfed. I usually have optimal dogs, but apparently plump and overfed dogs run slower and as such they do poorer in competitions, which is a pretty neat feature to have in-game. 

In the short of it, Nintendogs + Cats is fine, but Nintendogs (the original) is Good. I have a lot more nostalgia for Nintendogs which may cloud my opinion, but playing it in 2020 is still fun, and I’m especially happy to play the Agility competition.

For an interactive pet simulator with fun competitions and plenty to do, Nintendogs is the way to go.  For a pretty enough game with simplistic gameplay, Nintendogs + Cats is the way to go. 

Both games have their perks, but I certainly have a clear favourite. If a Switch edition of Nintendogs ever happened, I’d much prefer the original style with some of the quality of life changes made in the successor. In the end, it’s all up to what you’re looking for in a game - but as someone who’s looking for a fun time, I’m a sucker for the originals. 

(Note: I have not played the knock-off Nintendogs for Switch, and would appreciate input on if it’s worth buying or not. Reviews are poor at best, as far as I can tell, though.) 

[lilacyennefer]

Quarantine with Benny

Anon asked: I don’t know about you, but 181: “ If you’re bored; Wanna have sex? ” screams  Benny in quarantine to me.

A/N: I know I said I'm taking a break, but this request has been sitting in my inbox for awhile and all this Benny talk gave me inspiration so I had to write it. Also, I changed "if you're bored" to "I'm bored". 

TW: SMUT

It all happened so quickly. One day you were working, Benny was working, then the next day both of you are home, locked into your small apartment that you share with Benny. You had a job what you could do from home, but Benny couldn’t do anything since he just became a personal trainer. The first two weeks were really nice, Ben and you really enjoyed the time you could spend together, and the two of you took the opportunity to have sex really often, literally on every surface of the apartment. You handled the situation better than Benny, you were a lot calmer than him, almost opposite of him since Benny was a big bubble of energy, constantly moving, working out, and never running out of energy. So around the third week of not going out, only going grocery shopping, Benny started losing it. It started with slow things, he barely slept at night, having too much energy left from the day, then he couldn’t sit still, his legs were constantly bouncing, he was walking around the apartment a lot and spent a lot of time on the small balcony. You tried to give him things to do around the house while you worked, he started doing more housework than usual, and he finally fixed the faucet in the bathroom which has been leaking since the day you moved in. He did everything you asked him, happy to do anything just to occupy himself with something. Then he started being a mess, he was just sitting on the couch in self pity, replaying all his video games, watching whatever was on tv even if it didn’t interest him what led him to telling you random facts about anything he watched. Unfortunately, with you being locked in a small house together led you to more fights with Benny than you usually would have, you tried to avoid them, leaving it up to Benny whatever upset him or just ignore him when he tried to pick a fight with you just because he was bored. You didn’t blame him, you really couldn’t since both of you were stressed about this situation, and someone like Ben, whose job was about constantly working out and moving around, quarantine was like hell for him, he felt like an animal trapped in a cage. You loved Benny, and you wish you could help him somehow, to make this easier for him. 

You’re sitting on the couch now, working on some papers while Benny is watching a documentary about whatever. Your focus is completely on the papers when you hear Benny groan loudly and you look at him, his head is thrown back on the couch as he’s staring at the ceiling. 

“Everything okay?” You ask and he groans again.

“I’m so FUCKING bored.” Ben complains. He looks at you, but your focus is back on your papers. 

“I’m bored.” Ben says again “Wanna have sex?” He grins. You look at him again, his big blue eyes are focused on you, a soft smile is tugging at his lips. 

“I have to work, Ben.” You say, you fix your eyes back on the paper, but you reach out your legs and put one of your feet on his thigh. You hear Ben take a sharp breath and you smirk lightly, you wanted to have sex with him just as much as he wanted to have sex with you, but it was always fun to tease Benny a little bit. You move your feet a bit higher, slipping it under Benny’s shorts what he was wearing, and from the other end of the couch you could hear him take breath quicker than usual. He grabs both of your feet in his hands and grabs your ankles, and without any warning he yanked you lower on the couch so now you’re laying down on it instead of sitting. This earned a loud “What the HELL, Ben?” from you, but he just laughed as he took your papers away from you and threw it on the ground. 

“I have to work you know.” you smile at him softly.

“C’mon, babe, you know you gonna enjoy this.” Ben says with that big goofy grin of his and you try your hardest to not give in yet.

“I don’t know, Ben. What am I gonna get from this?” Ben acts like he's offended from your question and he sits back on the couch, arms spread as he’s gesturing all over his body.

“This.” he answers “And orgasms.” He wiggles his eyebrows at you and you can’t help, but laugh at him.

“It’s a good deal, isn’t it?” he asks you.

“Yes, yes it is.” you finally say and Benny is back on you, towering above you, staring deeply into your eyes before he leans down to kiss you. Both of you are smiling into the kiss and share a soft moment with each other as Ben is touching your forehead with his, simply enjoying your closeness. You loved Benny and you loved that he had a heart of gold, and how much he cared about the people he loved.

When Benny pulled away from you he was already taking his shirt off, then he reached for your soft cotton shorts to pull them off of you. He quickly undresses himself and you, and he’s back on you again, kissing and licking every part of your skin that he can reach. He gets up from the couch and kneels down on the floor, in front of you.

“Come here.” Benny says and you bite your lower lip from the excitement, knowing what’s coming next. One thing you learned pretty quickly into your relationship with Ben, is that he absolutely adores going down on you, he can spend so much time between your legs, licking and kissing your sensitive skin until you have to beg him to stop, because you’re too sensitive at that point. 

It’s not different now, Benny is eager to taste you as he’s kneeling on the ground and you move on the couch, spreading your legs for Ben. As you seated comfortably, he’s already all over you, kissing your inner thighs all the way up to your heat. Ben looks up at you with a smirk before he reaches his tongue out to flick it against your clit, making you gasp and jump a little. He lets out a small laugh before he runs his tongue from your hole to the base of your clit, not touching just yet.

“Benny.” You say in a warning tone “I did not stop working for you to tease me to death.” This earns another loud laugh from Ben. 

“But, babe, you love it so much when I tease you.” He says before his mouth is back on your wetness again. You let out a small curse as Ben’s tongue is licking your sensitive, pink flesh, and he finally, finally flicked his tongue over your clit. The sudden sensation made you jump a little, and you let out a loud moan at the same time. You more feel than hear Ben chuckle against your skin before he starts properly lapping your wetness, sucking and licking every part of you what he can reach with his tongue and mouth. 

Your eyes are fully closed as you give yourself over to the pleasure completely, your only focus is on how Benny makes you feel, how you melt under his touch, and how he moans against you as he’s working on you. 

You run your fingers through his hair, and rest your hand on the back of his neck, keeping him close to yourself, but it’s not like Benny wanted to be anywhere else, but between your legs. 

“Ben!” You moan his name desperately as you feel the fire in your belly grow stronger, and Ben hears this in your voice so he takes two of his fingers and slips them inside of you, curling them to touch that one spot inside of you what makes you see stars and makes you shake from pleasure. 

“BEN!!” You scream as you suddenly cum around his fingers and on his mouth. Ben is placing soft kisses on your mound and inner thighs as you try to catch your breath.

When you open your eyes you see Benny’s face close to you, and when you lock your eyes with his, your heart skips a beat from the love and adoration you see in his eyes. 

“You’re so beautiful when you come.” he whispers against your lips, so close to you that you can smell yourself on his breath. You grab his face in your hands and place a soft, loving kiss on his lips, and you can feel Ben smile into the kiss. 

You sit up on the couch and push Ben’s chest lightly, silently telling him to sit down next to you, and he takes the hint as he sits down with a smirk on his face. He sits on the couch, eyes never leaving you, his hand is wrapped around his hard cock as he pumps himself. You stand up in front of Ben, you lick your lips as you watch his hand move up and down round himself. 

You quickly take your shirt off and toss it somewhere, then you straddle Ben’s lap, his hands immediately on you, grabbing your hips, guiding you closer to his erection. It’s your turn now to smirk when you see how impatient Ben is, but you eventually give in as you lower yourself down on him, slowly, enjoying the feeling how he’s stretching you out. Ben lets out a curse when he’s fully inside you, his eyes are closed as he enjoys your wetness envelops him. 

You wrap your arms around Ben’s neck and kiss him passionately as you start moving slowly, rocking your hips against his. You moan into the kiss from the feeling of Benny’s cock moving inside of you and your clit rubbing against his lower stomach as you move, your chest pressed against his, your hard nipples rub against his hairy chest. 

Benny’s mouth never leaves yours as the two of you move in sync, moaning into each other’s mouth, cursing, groaning. 

“Y/N” Ben moans the same time you let out a small whine as pleasure grows more and more intense in your lower belly, and you know that Ben is close too, his fingers dig deeper into your skin, urging you to move faster, his groans are heavier and his head is thrown back on the couch, mouth open. 

You sit straight up, you put your hands behind yourself on Ben’s thighs so support yourself as you move harder and faster, chasing your and Benny’s pleasure. Ben lets out another loud curse from the view what’s in front of him, due to this position your boobs now are in front of his face, bouncing with every move. 

Ben leans closer to take one of your nipples into his mouth, sucking it hard, licking it, biting it gently. 

“Ben, I’m coming!” you say before you cum hard around him, moaning his name. 

It doesn't take long until Ben follows you, head thrown back, eyes closed shut as he cums deep inside of you. 

You keep moving lazily, letting the both of you ride your orgasms out. 

You lay your head on Benny’s ches, enjoying his closeness as he wraps his arms around you, hugging you close, kissing your cheeks and forehead.

[prettywordsyouleft]

Reconciliation - Part 4 [M]

Pairing: Im Jaebum x reader

Genre: ex-lovers au / angst / romance / business au

Warnings: unprotected sex, mature content.

Reconciliation will be shared daily at 10am NZST.

Preview | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

Jaebum didn’t know what good it would be talking to you but he was relieved he had. After you had run off the first time, he hadn’t made any effort to chase after you.

He had no right.

And so he watched as the waves rolled in and out of the shore, feeling his emotions react much the same. His heart ached for you and yet he had lost that chance, letting you go right when he should have held on instead. He was gutless; someone who had treated you like you would never get enough of him.

Since that’s how he felt about you.

Still, as the waves rolled in, he became hopeful. Maybe finding you here was a sign that someone above had given him another chance. Fate, as it will, had led him down the right path after all.

He wouldn’t have come here had he not wanted to rediscover you.

But there was more than just you that he needed to understand. Jaebum thought he knew all there was to himself. He was acutely aware of his temper as his biggest weakness, and yet he had many strengths that had made him successful.

Though, he was certain you were the main reason that he hadn’t crashed and burned years back.

Now laying on the bed with his leg propped up, he replayed the rest of the morning. You hadn’t told him enough, he decided, and that made him sigh, realising that had been consistently the theme over the years. He had been the one talking and you were the listener. Jaebum’s desire to hear more of your thoughts continued to eat at him, much like his hunger did. He hadn’t eaten yet and given he was actually doing what you instructed because of the pain in his ankle, Jaebum didn’t feel up to walking out to the restaurant to get anything to eat. Reaching for the hotel room’s phone, he ordered in a meal and then turned on the television to stop ruminating over what could have been. The distraction didn’t help much but when he heard the knock at the door, he hobbled over, appreciative of his food and the small bag of ice he had requested before taking his meal over to the table in the room.

Jaebum couldn’t help wondering what you had for lunch, or if you had any. Were you going to do something fun this afternoon or just relax since your morning had been, well, heightened by events with him. As he ate each mouthful, the further curious he became, going as far as to pull out his mobile phone and type up a message to send you.

Jaebum stopped himself just before pressing send, shaking his head. He had said his farewell before on his doorstep and you seemed eager to take it as that. He would only seem clingy and foolish now if he continued playing his hot and cold game with you.

Is this another of your games?

Retreating back to bed, Jaebum carried the bag of ice with him to place over his ankle. It wasn’t too bad of a sprain, though he hoped if he took good care of it right now, he’d be able to spend his final day here tomorrow outside of this room.

And maybe come across you one last time before he flew back home, back to reality where your worlds no longer crossed over.

Groaning as he threw his head back into the pillow with force, Jaebum started to chant loudly to stop thinking of you. He rolled around on the bed, now uncaring of whether the ice was on his ankle or not, and thumped at the sheets, begging his mind to stop pulling up images of you.

This was the consequence of ending up here at the same time. Fate brought forth the opportunity, but there was only so much it could do before it was in his court to complete the deal.

And he had failed.

Just when he felt at wit’s end, Jaebum stilled as he listened again, hoping he had actually heard the knock at the door correctly. Getting up, he made his way to see who was there, assuming it was room service to collect his plate. Smoothing down the hair he had no doubt riled up in his fit, he opened the door, the smile he had placed on his lips fading as he took you in.

You wrung your hands in one another as you caught his eyes. “I uh, well you see… maybe this is the wrong idea.”

“No!” he called as you started to retreat and swallowed quickly. “Would you like to come in?”

“I don’t know if it’s safe for me to, not in this state,” you admitted and his eyes flashed, noticing the pink tinge to your skin.

Jaebum knew you hadn’t stopped thinking about him either.

“I won’t do anything you don’t want to,” he vowed and you nodded absentmindedly, even laughing some.

“The problem is, I think I want to,” you stated and he slumped heavily into the doorframe, blinking when he realised what he had done in reaction.

You grinned. “You’re so clumsy today.”

“Don’t,” he warned with a pout, rubbing at his arm and stepping back towards the bed where he retrieved the ice bag. “I’m already struggling with this.”

“You were always quite useless at the most mundane of tasks.”

“Sue me for always thinking of the bigger picture,” he shot back as he laid back down. You took the bag from his hand and placed it over his ankle.

“Was that it? Always focusing on what was next and not what you had, Jaebum?”

His humour eased as he nodded. “Mm.”

“Was I not enough?”

“I wanted more for you.”

“I had plenty. We had, we had so much already, didn’t you see it?”

Jaebum merely stared at you until it unnerved you and you looked away. He smiled fondly. “I see you now.”

“Just now?”

“Do you want me to continue on from the beach talk?” he offered and you shook your head, resting your hand on his knee. He looked at it there for an immeasurable moment before he shifted up, taking your chin in his hand.

Your focus slipped from the ice and up to his face, searching his gaze for a sign that this could happen. He caressed the side of your cheek. “It’s all on your terms. I’ll do anything you want.”

“Even let me go?” you asked and Jaebum nodded tightly. “But you don’t want to?”

He couldn’t take it anymore, whining with the building need to take you in his arms. It was painful withholding the usual dominant way he took you and you seemed surprised that he hadn’t made a move already.

So you made your own.

Lips exploring his, you pushed him down onto the mattress, shifting with him so you now were seated over his waist. Jaebum felt the bag of ice slip off his foot as he reached up to encircle your waist, drawing you in closer to his body with a moan. Normally it was you who made all the noises first and he felt you smile into his lips, licking along them for further access. You were driving him mad and there was something different in the way you each moved right now. He was much too hesitant to take control and you were liberated by this. Pressing him further into the bedding, you moved your hips into his, receiving a guttural groan from him. He had gone far too long without your body and it worried him that he wouldn’t even hold out much longer. His stamina had taken a nosedive with your departure.

You were already heaving as well, and he noted it wasn’t only him that was struggling. “God, Jaebum-- just, we need to!”

Helping you out of your clothing and then allowing you to rid him of his own, Jaebum held your hips as he guided himself up inside you. The shared moment was loud as you both grew accustomed to the stretch and Jaebum gripped at your flesh to settle himself from bucking wildly from the sensation. When you were both ready, you began to move together in a rhythm that felt too familiar.

You both had never been one for slow and sensual first, and right now, the concept of that seemed torturous. Jaebum barely maintained control, feeling the coiling within his stomach not long after you began to rock on him. Deciding to utilise what little time he had left before he lost his cool, he aimed for the spot that always made you cry out in ecstasy, driving into you repeatedly until you did just that. With the flood of warmth, he joined you, wrapping himself up in you as he continued to jerk with his high.

Nestling into his chest as you made no effort to move aside from catching your breath, Jaebum buried his head into your shoulder, mouthing it lovingly. You sighed heavily.

“We didn’t last long at all.”

“Was it worth it?” he asked into your neck and you nodded, shivering with how good it felt. Shifting so he could place you down on the bed, Jaebum scooted down the bed, trailing his mouth over your body as he ended up in between your legs. You reached out for him impatiently, eyes hooded with lust. He licked at his lips before smirking. “Good. You didn’t think it would just end here though, did you?”

It was late when you both had finally had your fill. Spent, you laid within each other’s arms, lips pressing into any part of skin you could each reach. Jaebum fingered lightly the bruise rising upon the mound of your breast, feeling you arch within his grip ever so slightly.

“Hungry?” he asked and you hummed in response, kissing his shoulder. “For me?”

“For food,” you reiterated and he chuckled, nodding as he rolled towards the phone. You giggled since he pulled you along with him, reaching out for the menu so you could pick what room service would bring. Once ordered, you kissed Jaebum passionately before getting up and heading into the bathroom. You returned in one of his shirts and Jaebum bit his lip, wondering how after the endless lovemaking that he could feel himself get a rise once again. Throwing his pyjamas at him, you beckoned him to the edge of the bed, kneeling before him.

“Not that I think that ankle of yours is super painful if you can do all you have done tonight,” you mused, you rolled up one leg of his bottoms and place it over his foot. “I thought I should help you all the same.”

“Sick of seeing me like this?” he wondered with a smile and you rolled your eyes, your hands running up his thighs as you pulled the fabric with them.

“Honestly, you’re like an energiser battery,” you remarked as your efforts had definitely stirred him up again. “How long did they say we have until the food is here?”

“Are you unable to wait until your meal arrives for dessert?” he asked and you gripped at his thighs, clawing out a low curse from Jaebum. “Looks like I can’t either.”

_________________

Part 5

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[radiowrites]

Unchained Melody

He’s teaching her to drive, why can’t he teach her to dance, too?

A Tale of the Nine Tailed fanfiction, one-shot, 2300 words, complete. Ki Yu Ri/Lee Rang, Pre-Series, Rated T

Read it on: AO3 or below the cut:

“Pull over here,” Rang said. “I’m driving home.”

“Why?” Yu Ri asked.

“I’m just ready to get home in one piece.”

Yu Ri huffed and did as he told, pulling into the small parking lot too quickly, scattering gravel. She didn’t think she was doing that badly, because hey, she had only been driving for three days. Going through that red light was probably the final straw. She thought she’d make it through the yellow. He said that wasn’t how it worked.

She vacated the driver’s seat and stamped her foot as he took the keys. Unmoved, he slid into the car.

“Are you going to continue making a scene?” Rang asked through the open window. “People are watching.”

Not giving her a chance to answer, he started to roll the window up with a smile playing on his lips.

There were five or so people hanging out on the back steps of the building, a single security light casting a sickly yellow glow over them. It looked like a dive bar or a seedy club. They stared at Yu Ri in her pale blue sundress and platform sandals. She felt overdressed, and she considered this one of her simple outfits. Who knows what they thought of Rang, who always looked like he had stepped off a fashion runway.

One woman’s eyes widened when Yu Ri lifted her upper lip in irritation. Yu Ri assumed the woman would later explain away the fangs she had seen as a side effect of the alcohol.

Yu Ri tossed her long brown hair and rapped on the glass with her knuckles. “Maybe I’ll walk,” she said loudly.

He shrugged and put the car into drive.

Would he really leave her there? With what Yu Ri actually was, Rang would know she was in absolutely no danger. Which meant she wouldn’t put it past him. She scurried around the front of the car and jumped into the passenger seat.

Once safely settled in, she threw him a dirty look. Taking the wheel wasn’t really about them getting hurt in an accident as much as damaging the car, wasn’t in? She put her feet up on the dash, letting her dress shift and bare her thighs. He looked over at her with reproach and she grinned. He was an easily distracted driver. Where did he think she learned it from?

Instead of watching him drive—which would have been good practice, in theory—she picked up her phone. In this day and age, it was pretty easy to learn to be human, Yu Ri had to admit. Humans uploaded videos of everything. All their life stages. All their big events. She could pull up a video of the simplest things. People talking. People laughing. Manners at a restaurant and etiquette when invited to someone’s home. Families. Couples.

Yu Ri acted like watching these things were part of her pass-as-a-human curriculum, but they had become more to her. When she laid down at night the videos replayed in her head, except she found herself in them, truly a part of the mundane moments. These were happy dreams, far better than her usual ones. They weren’t something she could share with Rang. He wanted her to pass as human and yet believe herself above them. It was a hard line to walk for her, and she couldn’t conceive what it was like for an actual half-human like him.

But when she woke after such a dream, she was immediately reminded how far she still had to go before she could truly blend in. Right now she was just playing a foolish game. Oh sure, she had picked up the language well enough. She was able to dress herself now. But, sometimes she forgot to use the utensils at the table. People involuntarily stepped away when she stood too close. Baring her teeth at the woman in the parking lot wasn’t her only indiscretion. The other day she had growled at someone on the subway. She was pretty sure the guy had liked it though, and that was way worse.

All in all, she was doomed to fail at this, she was certain. But she still wanted to try.

Yu Ri shoved her phone at Rang with a video playing. “This is dancing, right?”

He didn’t look away from the road. “Sure.”

She pouted, pulling the phone back. The two figures flowed across the floor, hands on shoulders and waists, eyes trained on each other. She started the clip over and watched it again. Yu Ri swayed slightly in her seat, mimicking the movement the best she could.

“I want to try this,” she said.

“I don’t dance.”

She looked over at him with raised eyebrows. “Six-hundred-years-old and you can’t dance?”

“I said I don’t, not I can’t.”

She rolled the words on her tongue. She didn’t think there was that much of a difference, but she would remember it for the future.

Rang pulled into the parking garage of the apartment. Yu Ri dutifully studied the way he parked the car. Pulled the key. Looked over at her with his dark eyes. Her gaze fell back down to her phone. Okay, maybe she was just watching him instead of his actions.

“If you’re going to pick up a hobby, we can find you an instructor,” he said.

“You’d trust me with a stranger? What if I do something not-human?”

“Then I’ll erase a few memories and get a good laugh out of it.”

He got out of the car and she followed, sullen.

 Yu Ri dropped onto one end of the sectional sofa. She wasn’t done yet.

“You’re teaching me to drive,” she said. “How is that any different?”

“You probably should have an actual instructor for that, too.”

She tapped her bare feet on the floor, thinking for another approach. “I could probably find a dance partner at that bar,” she said.

Sitting on the opposite end of the sofa, absently on his phone, Rang ignored her.

Rude.

She picked up her own phone and tried to continue the last video. The description said it was a type of waltz. She really had no idea. She turned up the sound and peered over the phone to see if it had an effect on him.

Rang’s eyes flickered over to her. Ran his hand through his dark hair as he set the phone down. Leaned back and closed his eyes.

Fine. She would give it up, for now. If Rang didn’t want to do something, he was unmovable. And the bar had really been an empty threat. She had a sneaking suspicion the night would end with her needing to be picked up at the police station and him laughing at her.

Nothing said she couldn’t continue her own research though.

Four or seven videos later—she had lost track as she kept following the next suggestion—the dances had become a lot less structured. She had apparently wandered right out of ballroom dancing. Most of these didn’t look like professionals as much as just normal people caught on camera. Just basic slow dancing at parties. Yu Ri worried at her lip with her teeth. The dances had become less sensual and more sexual. Guilt for trespassing onto their secret worlds and desiring to be in their shoes washed over her. She had never felt that way before.

Eyeing Rang, who seemed to have dozed off, the question about guilt died on her tongue. He wouldn’t be able to answer it anyway. But now, she realized why he refused to dance with her. Dancing wasn’t just a sport or a means of exercise. Humans danced with people they loved, too.

Yu Ri stood up and set her phone down gently, tilting it so she could still see the screen. Her body rocked back and forth, imitating the dancers. Her hands grasped at air, but if she thought really hard, she could imagine someone was there, supporting her as she moved slowly across the floor. Being able to envision something that wasn’t really happening was like being in a dream.

She remembered a few times in her past when she had managed to close her mind and make the pain fade away. Back then, there had been no words in her vocabulary for imagination and dreams.

The lyrics of the song playing held no meaning to her, only the slow but steady tempo. Yu Ri closed her eyes as she gently twirled, her feet gliding across the floor. Her dress billowed out around her as she instinctively avoided the low table.

Her empty hands met silky fabric and her eyes flew open as she was guided through the spin. One of her hands naturally grasped at his shoulder, the other was furled into his chest as his hand slid down her back. She swayed with him, slowly rotating, uncertain if she was still in a reverie.

No, this was real. The rapid beat of her heart grounded her. From the exertion, she told herself.

“Loosen your grip on my shoulder, Yu Ri,” Rang said softly. “Leaving bruises isn’t recommended.”

She nodded, concentrating on lifting her fingers and relaxing the iron hold. He took the hand she had clenched into his chest. Releasing his shoulder, she spun away from him like she had seen in one of the videos, held together by their intertwined fingers. Like a thread of fate, she followed it back to him. Her back was now to his chest, and her arm crossed her breasts, their still locked fingers at her hip. His breath was on her neck, and her face was hot. From the exercise, of course.

“I thought,” she said, tripping over her words, “you don’t dance.” At least her feet didn’t betray her.

“I didn’t say I can’t,” he replied, soft laughter in his voice.

She could not remember any more moves she had wanted to incorporate. Perhaps another time, since she already made a mess of perfectly formed dance routines anyway.

There wouldn’t be another time, but the first thought was nicer.

She twirled in his arms so they were face to face again and their steps became slower, smoother. She could sense the atmosphere changing. Their diameter of movement kept shrinking, and she thought he had stiffened slightly when she reached up and draped her arms around his neck. There was a pause before his hands slid to her hips, framing her, holding her. She hadn’t been so close to him in awhile. His scent made her think of ancient forests and tranquil ponds, though she had never been to either. Maybe he’d take her to the place of his childhood one day.

The day she was able to easily decipher Rang’s expressions would be a huge breakthrough indeed. Despite her constant line of questions when it came to human emotions, the concept of love had come up only once. So she had turned to the internet, and that, in all reality, hadn’t helped her much either. Did she love Rang because he had saved her? Did she love him like the family she had never had? Did she love him like a potential mate?

Yu Ri knew, deep down, the word love fit in there somewhere for her, even if she couldn’t pinpoint it down to which one. But Rang had already made it ultimately clear that he wasn’t interested in the word love, in any form. Their relationship was safe. If she tried to ask for something different, he would pull away.

His hands shifted, supporting her back, and he dipped her. She gasped, certain they’d fall despite his cocky smile. Her dark hair streamed out beneath her as she held tighter around his neck. Their eyes locked for a moment before he righted her.

“Nicely done,” Rang said. “Seems like you’re a natural.”

She couldn’t stop the grin from settling on her face. She’d never been a natural at something, especially when it came to human anything. She doubted any of the professionals she had been watching earlier would agree with him, but she would accept the compliment graciously.

The moment broke when the music on her phone changed to something harsh and jarring. Frustrated, her hands unwound from his neck. She knew she had been pushing the limit of how long she could hold him anyway.

Yu Ri picked up her phone and scoffed softly as she turned off the video. Such a little thing could bring her running just because the sound was annoying. She might have been an untamed creature in the not too distant past, but she was quickly domesticating.

When she turned back, he had already left the room. She bit back the urge to call out to him, instead sinking onto the sofa.

Behind her, the jangle of keys made her jump. Her heart sank.

“I’m going for a drive,” Rang said. “Call me if you need anything.”

She nodded, though she didn’t know if he had waited for her acknowledgment as the door clicked behind him. She keenly felt the fact she hadn’t been invited.

The sudden silence hit her hard. She turned the first video back on for just the music, turning up the volume more than before. Why did he decide to dance with her after the initial rejection? The melody, haunting now, was a good companion for her mood.

There was nothing domesticated about Rang. He was always in fight or flight mode. He would revert back to wild in a heartbeat, wouldn’t he? If he deemed she was becoming too attached to him, would she be sent on her way? Did he expect that to happen eventually?

She wouldn’t let that happen, Yu Ri thought as she stood up to continue dancing alone.

[fanfoolishness]

Full Disclosure (Steven Universe)

(As Steven runs out of other people’s problems to solve, he’ll finally have to face his own.  Set after the events of the Steven Universe movie.  Angst, PTSD, high-functioning depression, dealing with old traumas and fearing potential new ones, Connverse, love, and a little bit of hope.  4660 words, also on AO3.

A companion piece, ice cream sundaes, is from Greg’s perspective, and examines some of the aftermath. See Growing Things for the sequel to both stories. )

***

The day is light and bright and breezy, the scent of flowers on the air.  Far below Steven hears birdsong, faint and lovely in the distance.  Amethyst and Garnet behind him avidly watch the fight.

He’s babbling, desperate for attention, and Pearl tries to be patient with him.  He can see in her face so clearly now the annoyance, the irritation.  Light flashes, sun on steel.  

He knows what’s going to happen, but he keeps chattering to her, stupid questions and childish wants streaming out of his mouth.  Why can’t he warn her, why can’t he stop, why can’t he just be quiet --

The sword drives through Pearl’s chest, glittering in the sunlight, and it’s only then that he gasps himself awake.

***

“Steven!” Pearl said brightly as the temple door opened.  “You’re up so early.”

Steven managed a shrug, watching the coffee brew.  He wished he could swing by the Big Donut for something to have with it, but it was still two hours before the shop opened.  “Uh, you know what they say.  The early bird gets the worm.”

“Drinking coffee and eating worms?” Pearl asked in confusion.  “Garnet said you would be going through some changes at this age, but she didn’t say anything about worms.”

“No, no, I’m not really eating worms,” he reassured her.  He poured the coffee into his old Cookie Cat thermos and added several heaping teaspoons of sugar.  “I’m just… trying to get an early start for training.  I’ll see you later, Pearl.”

“I’m proud of you, Steven, making sure to stay on top of your training.  After all, Spinel took us all by surprise.  We can’t have that again!  Would you like some company?” she asked.  She smiled warmly at him, and he saw the blade, glinting as her gem fell to the ground.

“No, I -- I was going to work on some basics alone.  But thanks,” he said hurriedly.

Her lilting “I love you, Steven!” followed him through the warp stream to the Sky Arena.  He stumped up the steps and sat at the far end of the arena, barely shivering in the predawn chill.  He drank his coffee and blinked back sleep, watching the sun spill gold and orange and pink in fiery glory, and he told himself, It was a long time ago.

So why did it still bother him?

***

Amethyst’s voice is a backwards gurgle, her eyes mismatched and fearful.  Steven bends over her, trying not to look at her limbs all stretched and wrong, trying to feel the tears he knows are there just beneath the surface.  He cries all the time -- he’s such a little kid still -- and yet he can’t seem to do it now when it matters.  

Rose Quartz looms above him in grayish stone and browning thorns.  He wonders what this place looked like when she was here: beautiful and safe, pink and green, filled with the scent of roses.  They miss her so much.  Steven gazes up at her, at her smile held in a peaceful rictus, and he knows in the pit of his stomach that he will never be able to make it up to them.

“I’m sorry, Amethyst,” he croaks, and the crack in her gem spreads, split, fractures --

***

He woke up with a start, breathing hard.  He sat up straight and scrubbed his hand across his face, trying to slow his breathing back down.  It’s fine.  She’s fine.  I could heal her now.  He turned on his lamp and rolled out of bed, turning on his television and game system.

“Steven?” asked Amethyst some time later, fluttering up from the dark staircase as an owl and landing beside him on the bed.  “Hey dude, I know we’re supposed to give you more privacy now, but I thought I heard you playing Lonely Blade VII.  That’s totally the best one, so I get it, but aren’t you usually asleep now?”  She switched back to her normal form, looking suspicious.

“Hey, Amethyst,” said Steven, fighting a yawn.  “I’ve been meaning to go back and replay this.  I, uh, saw a guide that said there were all sorts of Easter eggs I missed.  So I’m going back through and trying to find them all.  It’s a completionist run.”

“I don’t see any eggs,” said Amethyst, peering at the screen.  Lonely Blade executed a flawless triple backflip scorpion kick, sending his evil twin flying into a stack of barrels for an extra skill point.

“Not that kind of Easter egg,” Steven chuckled.  “They mean in-jokes. References to other stuff.  But come on.  I can switch to multiplayer if you’re up for a challenge.”

“Oh, I will destroy you,” she said, settling in beside him.  “But I heard growing young adults were supposed to sleep a lot, and you look pretty tired. I could come back and kick your butt later if you need to get some rest.”  She shrugged.  “Besides, I thought you loved sleeping.  How long have you been playing this?”

“Just a little bit,” Steven said.  It wasn’t really a lie: on the level of Gem existence, four hours wasn’t long at all. “Anyway, maybe I don’t love sleep as much as I used to. I’m evolving, Amethyst.”  He said it in such a lofty voice that she snorted.

“See if you can evolve past my lightning fists!” She grabbed a controller.  They played on into the morning, until the sun flared in the east and filled his room with golden light.  They played match after match, Steven getting tired and fumbling on the buttons, but he knew there’d be no more rest for him today.  Amethyst laughed at her victories, and Steven watched the screen until it blurred.

It’s fine.  She’s fine.

I’m fine.

***

Jasper towers over him, roaring, a destabilizer crackling in her hand.  Garnet’s face is determined, her fists raised, her back straight and strong.  She always protects him, she always takes care of him, she --

Yellow lines spark across her body, creeping, inching, writhing.  And she falls, her face showing only a sudden surprise as she vanishes, Ruby and Sapphire’s gems looking so small in the sand.  Steven scrabbles in it, his hands tearing into the grains, trying to back away.  He tries to make another shield, but he’s drained, paralyzed, weak.  His mind is blank, his only sensation sheer buzzing panic, and Jasper turns to him with a triumphant grin --

***

“It looks like there’s room for one more,” said Garnet kindly.  Steven shook his head, blinking rapidly, and realized he’d fallen asleep at one of the tables outside the Big Donut.  Garnet rested a hand on his shoulder, Sapphire’s silver band glittering on her ring finger, and he remembered that Jasper’s attack was more than three years ago.

“Always,” he said, unsettled.  “Sorry I fell asleep.”  He remembered his coffee and donuts on the table next to him, and drained the cup of coffee in one gulp.  It had gone cold.

“I knew you would,” said Garnet, smiling and taking a seat beside him. Her visor hid her eyes, but he knew by her tone that she was winking.

She doesn’t know, he told himself.  It’s future vision, not psychic vision.  “I guess I can’t fool you,” he said, trying to make his face look something like happy.

“Don’t work too hard,” she said gently.  “We need you, Steven.”

He swallowed, his mouth dry, and nodded mechanically.  “I know.”  The smile he finally managed felt stretched and thin, but she seemed to believe it.  He busied himself eating his donuts.  They tasted like sawdust.

***

Don’t fall asleep --

Dad panicking in his van with the wreckage of Jasper’s ship all around them, hit with the weight that he could have lost his only family, and Steven horrified, wondering why he’s never realized before how serious this all is.

Bismuth’s face with Rose’s sword piercing through her, Steven’s hands shaking on the blade, the guilt boiling through him more painful than the burns on his feet.  He staggers as Bismuth sags against him, as she poofs and her gem clatters to the ground.  The lava surges beneath his feet, and the sweat and tears he sheds evaporate before they hit the floor.

Wake up --

He throws Eyeball into the void of space, but he can’t watch as she vanishes.  He gasps, trying to calm himself after their sudden battle.  His heart pounds.  His bubble shrinks around him smaller than it has ever been before, his breath growing thin and scanty, and all around him is nothing but the cold certainty that he will never, ever be found.

Stevonnie is falling, falling, knowing that they’ll die unless Steven can get out of his own head, but how can he?  Rose’s crimes become his own, bleeding into his hands and his choices.  He’s done so many terrible things even when he tries to do his best, and they crowd into his mind, the guilt overwhelming --

Please wake up -- 

Greg’s taken and stolen for the zoo, scared and alone because Steven had to see, Steven had to fight with the Gems, Steven had to know for himself; Connie and Jamie and Lars and Sadie and Onion, all of them captured and frightened, and all of it Steven’s fault, not Rose’s, it’s his --

Then there’s Lars, hitting the stone column with a horrible dull sound, hitting the ground with a softer one.  No, please, not this, Steven thinks, but he can’t escape the way Lars lies there, limp and somehow small.  Steven does what no one else can do, what maybe no one should do, his tears on Lars’ face; and in his ears, the slow, slow, slow drum of Lars’ heart.

Please --

***

Steven’s fingers slid up and down the guitar neck, and he leaned into the buzzing of his fingertips, the growl of the guitar in his ears.  It was hard to think while he focused on playing along with Greg’s lead.  He’d always liked losing himself in music, but now it seemed more important than ever.  He played with his dad, his mind finally quiet for a little while, the ocean breeze cool on his face.

Then his hand slipped.  A tangle of sour notes.  He scowled at the clash between his dad’s melody and his own accompaniment.  

Normally, he’d just keep playing through it.  That had always been Greg’s advice -- keep the rhythm, and the audience was unlikely to notice an off note.  He knew that, but his hands fell to his sides anyway, unable to play through the error.

Greg continued on for two bars before his playing trailed off, too.  “Schtu-ball?  Need to take a break?”

Steven gave his dad a wan half-grin.  “Yeah, maybe.  Fingers getting tongue-tied.”  Reluctantly he turned down the volume, unplugged his guitar, and set it back carefully into the van.  

“Happens to all of us,” Greg said, putting his own guitar away.  “Something bothering you, kiddo?  You seem a little far away.”

Steven opened his mouth, searching for the words.  He didn’t even know where he would start.  

Dad, I’ve been having nightmares about stuff that happened years ago.  Gem stuff I never told you about --  But he imagined Greg’s face, falling as he realized Steven hadn’t trusted him enough to tell him, and Steven closed his mouth again.  He knew he couldn’t handle seeing the hurt in Greg’s eyes.  He searched for something else to say.

“Do you ever think about the future, Dad?”

“Sure, Steven,” said Greg, looking curious and a little concerned.  “Do you?”

Steven stared at his hands.  They were soft, young, smooth, no scars or lines to mar their surface.  They showed no sign of ever having held a sword or thrown a punch.  Then again, would they ever?

He glanced at Greg’s hands, noting wrinkles, a few freckles, tan lines, an old scar over one thumb.  “Garnet can see possibilities.  But she doesn’t know which one is going to happen… only the possibility that makes the most sense with the information she has.”  His fingers twisted, folding into each other in his lap.  “No one knows what’s going to happen to me, do they?  You said it yourself.  There’s never been anyone like me.”

Greg put a hand over Steven’s.  It was calloused and strong.  “That’s not a bad thing.”  He gave Steven a smile.  “I didn’t know what would happen when I met your mom, but look at how things turned out.  The Gems are finally free.  You know how to use your mom’s powers, but you’re also an incredible human being.  I hope you know how proud I am, kiddo.”  He reached out and tousled Steven’s hair.

Steven sighed.  “What would I do without you, Dad?”  He smiled back at his dad, but suddenly Greg wasn’t Greg.  He was pink.  Dark eyes stared out of pink skin, pale pink hair falling around him like a shroud.

Steven shook his head frantically, trying to clear the vision.  Greg looked at him, puzzled, normal as ever with his ruddy tan and his graying hair.  

What would I do without you, Dad?

Maybe I wouldn’t let you go.

“Thanks,” he said quickly, giving his dad a hug.  “I just remembered -- I said I’d meet up with Connie.  See you tomorrow?”

“Oh!” said Greg, clearly surprised.  “Of course.  But Steven -- if you need to talk, you know your old man’s always here for you.”

Are you supposed to be?  Is that allowed?  Would you -- would you even want that?  

Steven hurried down the sidewalk back to the beach, hands jammed in his pockets, trying to remember the quiet space he’d been in while playing music.  He hummed the melody Greg had been playing, but stumbled over it.  

He reached for a different song.  Take a moment to think of just --

But instead he thought of Lion.  How long were lions supposed to live?  How old was Lion, really?  How old could he become?  What if there was no limit?

He thought of Lars, and he heard that slow, deep heartbeat again.  He thought of two trees in rolling pink fur beneath a sunless sky.  He thought of more trees rising, a tree for Greg, for Connie, for the Maheswarens, for Sadie, enough trees to cover Beach City, and he wasn’t sure which would be worse.  

Two trees lonely in a pink void, or a pink forest stretching infinite.

****

Connie’s face is cold, her body stiff as she turns away on Lion’s back.  She rides into the early moonlight, the sinking sun behind her, until she vanishes through Lion’s roar.

Come back! I’m sorry! he wants to scream, but instead he sees her face upturned as she treads water, hears her shouting for him to jump down, to not leave her, to let her help him.

Her sword clangs against Pearl’s spear, then flies from her hands to spin across the white floor.  Pearl holds her tightly in an embrace she can’t escape --

She bends before him, a knight offering her service, lower and less than --

She holds him as they fall together, as he sobs, and her arms around him feel like they’re the only thing keeping him from going crazy --

The dream shifts.  He stands on the sand, watching the waves lap against his bare toes.  The ocean is drenched in pink and gold.  

“I didn’t want this,” says Connie, and she stands beside him.  But the pink in her hair and skin doesn’t come from the setting sun.  “You should have let me --”  She reaches out, touching his cheek, then lets her pink hand fall.  The sinking sun reflects in her dark eyes, twin fires falling into a black sea, and the tears streak her face.

“I couldn’t let you go,” Steven says, fighting a growing panic, a sickening knowledge.  “I had to save you.”

“But what am I?” she asks, laying his hand on her chest.  Beneath his palm he feels her heartbeat.  

One. A long, agonizing silence.  Two.  “Steven, what did you do to me?”

***

The mornings began to look alike, bleeding and blurring into one another, the routine becoming second nature.  Wake up too early.  Drink too much coffee.  Shower and shave.  Stomachache (from too much coffee). Get dressed.  Stay awake.

Stay awake.

The mornings were the same, but the days were different.  There was always something more to do, ways to help, problems to fix. Things he could distract himself with, at least during the day.  He lived for that.

He walked through Little Homeworld, stopping to speak to the uncorrupted Gems, visiting Nephrite and her crew the most.  He spoke with the Diamonds regularly, giving updates, checking in to make sure they weren’t getting into trouble.  Spinel was always eager to see him when he called.  He trained with Pearl and Garnet and Amethyst, Peridot and Lapis and Bismuth.  They were always so happy to see him, so proud of all he’d done.

He walked the streets of Beach City, visiting his dad, seeing Lars and Sadie and the rest of his friends.  He chatted with Bill Dewey and Mayor Nanefua.  He ate the bits.  

He worked on Beach City soil, trying to regrow the life Spinel’s injector had snuffed.  It was coming along nicely.  He thought there’d be another few weeks at most for life to come back and for the patchiness of the returning plants to fill in.  There’d always be more work to do, but this was work that had an endpoint.  He could deal with that.

Of course, he spent time with Connie.  Sometimes they trained, separately and as Stevonnie.  He made sure during those times to lock up the dreams and push them back; he worked hard to think of flexibility, love and trust, instead of... other things.  It worked, and Stevonnie trained hard, growing stronger all the time.

Sometimes Steven and Connie relaxed.  They’d put on silly shows or laugh at how bad the Dogcopter movies were in retrospect (though they still had a soft spot for them).  They played board games with the Gems and listened to music with Greg.  Sometimes, they just spent time being, and when Connie would announce she was hitting her curfew, he was always surprised at how fast the time went.

He and Connie talked late into the days as spring began to shift and summer hinted at its return.  They hugged more than they used to, held hands when they didn’t need to, and sometimes Connie rested her head on his shoulder in a way that made him dizzy.  He didn’t know what to call it, yet, but he knew he loved her more than ever, and he knew she felt the same.

“Are you all right, Steven?” Connie asked one night beneath the stars; she’d been working on her homework, stretched out on the floor, and he’d been idly working on a song.  She finished packing up her backpack, but she didn’t put it on.  

“Of course,” he said reflexively, but his fingers paused on his guitar.  “Uh, why are you asking?”

She left her backpack behind and scooted over to where he was sitting.  “I don’t know,” she said honestly.  She rested one hand on his guitar, nudging against his until their fingers laced together.  “Something just feels off.”

“With me?” he asked, his heart pounding.  He hoped she couldn’t hear it.

“Maybe.”  She gazed at him, her free hand pushing her hair behind her ear, smoothing it again and again.  She bit her lip.  “You just seem so tired, Steven.  And I can’t figure out why.”

He chuckled nervously.  “I’ve just been doing a lot.  Training, and repairing the damage from the injector, and talking to the Diamonds, and helping at Little Homeworld -- I’ve been busy!  I guess it’s catching up to me.  That’s all.”

Connie nodded to herself, looking sad.  She leaned against him, warm, solid, familiar.  Her voice was gentle.  “Look, I know something’s up.  I was hoping you wanted to tell me about it, but maybe you’re not ready.  It’s okay if you need to think stuff over… but it’s also okay to ask for help.”  She wiped at her eyes.  “When you are ready, please talk to me.  Jam buds, remember?”

Steven squeezed her hand.  He took a deep breath, one, then another.  “Jam buds.  Forever.”

The silence between them pulsed, a beat all its own.

He didn’t trust himself to speak past the lump in his throat.  Instead he put aside his guitar, wrapped his arms around her, and held her as tight as he could.

***

He’s back on Homeworld.  All around him is pink and pink and pink, his hands in Pink Diamond’s gloves, the walls of her tower miles high above him.  He’s the lost, the lonely, the little again, helpless and hapless.  

Stevonnie is joyful, sudden, sublime, and yet they’re thrown to the ground like so much trash, trapped in a tower with no food or water, and when they separate, there’s fear, fear, fear --

A flash of white at the edge of his vision, Yellow and Blue screaming silently as White takes them over, Pearl and Garnet and Amethyst paling, stripped of their color, their beauty, their flaws, and all of them smiling that knowing smile --

He’s weightless in White’s hand, pulled up so fast through the air he almost vomits.  He can’t move. Can’t speak. His bubble shivers and shatters before it can even form. 

Her nails shine in her own light, glinting blackest black and blinding white.  They click against his gem, sharp on its edges, and the sensation is chalkboard scratches felt in his bones, his gut, his soul.

She pulls — she twists — this isn’t happening -- 

She plucks his gem from the core of him, and soundlessly he screams.  And screams.

It hurts and it doesn’t.  It’s a wound and a lack and a missing that empties him of everything he’s ever been.  So small an action for her -- and yet she’s pithed him of everything Steven.  There is nothing left.

“Please,” he whispers, slumped on the ground.  His heart stutters in his chest, forgetting itself. He reels, sick with the loss, and he begs her, begs anyone who will listen.  “I -- I need it --”   He’s so small without this -- so, so weak.

This is what dying feels like --

***

He didn’t understand that he was awake at first; he was gasping, panting under the covers of his bed.  His hand clawed at his gem.  Please, please, please be there.  He gripped it hard, and it was warm and sure, secure, part of him the way it always had been.  Except for —  

Steven was still for a moment, his fingers resting against his gem.  Then he started sobbing.

He sobbed so hard his chest hurt, raw cries that his hands barely muffled.  He didn’t know how long he cried.  All he knew was that when he finally quieted, his eyes were swollen and his throat was sore.  He shook all over.

Why can’t I stop this? he thought miserably, his head pounding.  Dreams used to help me!

Once, his dreams had been useful.  They’d shown him Pink’s memories, Malachite’s battles, the Cluster’s mind.  They’d helped him aid Kiki and Lars.  They’d given him what he needed to call for help on Homeworld.  They’d shown him problems he hadn’t named, shown him what he needed to solve them.  And when they’d done so, then they’d change once more to silly Steven dreams, simple things that made him smile instead of weep. He missed those dreams.  Missed sleep.  Missed rest.

He bowed over himself, his breathing still ragged, head spinning.  Why did he keep dreaming these unbearable things --

He froze, an awful chill running through him.

I’m the problem.

There was a warm whuff of air against his ear.  Blearily Steven looked up, and in the shadows and the moonlight he made out Lion’s face.  

Lion nudged Steven’s shoulder.  Steven leaned his head against Lion’s, reaching out and stroking his mane.  The fur was soft on his fingertips.

“Lion,” he whispered.  The words didn’t want to come.  “Lion, I’m scared.”  The words faded into the quiet room, falling away.  Lion’s purr was a low rumble, a familiar comfort.

Steven reached for his phone with a shaky hand.  He leaned hard against Lion as it rang.

Two, three, four rings.  Then a click, and Connie’s voice, tired but sharpened by fear.  “Steven?  Steven, what’s wrong?  Are you okay?”

A beat.  “No,” he confessed, his voice cracking.  “I’m not okay, Connie.”

“What happened?  Are you hurt?  What’s going on?”

“Nothing… happened… it’s just, it’s me, Connie, something’s wrong with me.”  The words hurt, but he couldn’t stop them now.  They came out in a frantic rush.  “It’s like I’m sick or something. I can’t sleep.  I just keep seeing all of it again, everything horrible that’s ever happened to me, everything horrible I’ve ever done. It’s so real and I can’t get away from it.  And I worry about you and Dad and everyone… but I don’t want any of you to ever worry about me, because I’m supposed to protect you, that’s what I’m for.  I can’t let anyone down.  That’s why I didn’t want to tell you.”  

He gripped Lion’s mane hard enough that his hand ached from the effort.  “I know you said once it was okay to think about the bad things, but I can’t, Connie, it’s too much.”  He was crying again.  “I’m sorry.”

Silence.  He knew it.  He’d messed up again.  He should never have scared her like this --

“Steven Quartz Universe,” she said, and though her voice trembled, there was steel beneath it.  “Send Lion to me right now.  I’ll be there as soon as I can.  And we’re gonna get through this, okay?  Because I love you, and your dad loves you, and the Gems love you.  We’ll take care of you, Steven, all of us. Because that’s what we’re for.”

“Okay,” he whispered.  Lion glanced at him, and Steven nodded.  With a roar Lion vanished into the dark.  

Dully Steven ended the call, set aside his phone, and turned on his lamp.  He squinted at the sudden brightness and brushed the water out of his eyes.  It was all he had time to do before there came another roar.  

Lion knelt so Connie could dismount.  She was still in her pajamas, her hair in a messy ponytail, her face flushed.  Tears shone on her face in the lamplight.  “Oh, Steven.”

“Connie…”

And then she was beside him on the edge of the bed, holding him tight, her arms strong but soft around him as they both cried.  That was how the Gems found them the next morning; it was how Greg saw them after Pearl called and told him to come; it was how they remained through tears, and time, and talking.  Steven wasn’t sure how long they spoke, but the sun was high when he finally stopped. 

They sat in silence, deep in thought.  Steven’s head rested on Connie’s shoulder, her arms still around him.  Greg sat beside him, rubbing Steven’s back with one hand the way he used to when Steven was little.  Lion was curled on the bed, purring but awake.  Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl sat on the rug in front of them, all of them fighting back tears.

Steven let out a long breath, managing a faint smile.  “I love you guys, you know,” he said hoarsely.

“We know,” said Garnet, all three eyes sad but gentle.

“Of course we do, Steven,” Pearl said.  She rubbed at her face, wiping away tears.

Amethyst sniffed.  “We love you, dude.”

“This’ll take time, kiddo,” said Greg.  His face was blotchy, his eyes red and swollen.  “But we’re all here to help.  I’m just glad you told us.”

Connie kissed his forehead.  “It’s gonna be okay, Steven. Maybe not today or tomorrow.  But it will be.”  

Steven didn’t reply.  He had fallen asleep, his head safe on Connie’s shoulder; and his sleep was sweet, and dark, and dreamless.

[artificialqueens]

A Vampire in Paris, Chapter 4 (Crygi) -  Chae

A/N: so basically crygi smut is the weirdest thing to write ever and i’m never doing it again (they are just too wholesome guys) - but believe it or not it actually had to happen? (you’ll see) and i needed a chapter more than 100 words so… if you like this story but don’t like smut, there are still parts worth reading/kind of plot-essential in this chapter, so i’d just skip over the explicit stuff. so yeah. the smut chapter. more fashion and vampires coming right after this, i promise.

Summary: Crystal came out of the shower naked, Gigi likes Crystal, and Crystal likes Gigi. What could possibly go wrong?

——

“Oh my god! Crystal I’m so sorry I didn’t know you’d be naked out here, shit shit shit!” 

Was the first thing Gigi said whilst frantically covering her eyes and looking away, while the only thing Crystal could think to do was grab the comforter off the nearby bed and use that for cover.

“First of all, it’s okay! As if you don’t know what a female body looks like,” Crystal said, walking to the younger girl and taking her hands off her eyes. Gigi was never very flustered and always kept her cool — except now, obviously. Crystal found her beet red cheeks and wide eyes extremely adorable. 

“Second of all, I know you want to see me naked anyway,” Crystal continued, making Gigi blush even harder, covering her face in embarrassment. “And third of all, were you snooping?”

“I was bored!”

“You bitch! What if I had a dildo or something?”

“Sounds like a good time to me!”

“Genevieve!”

The two cracked up, completely forgetting the awkward situation, if even for a brief second. “Wait, so do you have a dildo?” Gigi asked with an eyebrow raised.

“Oh my god!”

“Of course you do, you lesbo.”

“Don’t call me a lesbo, lesbo!”

“I’ll call you what I want, Crystal!”

“And what’s that?”

“Uh… lesbo?”

Gigi’s unsure tone caused the two to stop their banter, the two sensing something underlying her statement.

“Are you sure that’s what you wanted to say?” Crystal asked with a smirk.

Gigi avoided eye contact and looked at her nails, specifically noting how they were short and how convenient that happened to be.

“Gigi…”

“Crystal…”

“You didn’t want to say ‘baby,’ did you?”

Silence. Crystal held back laughter, Gigi bit her lip. Crystal walked towards the blonde, a grin plastered across her face. “If you won’t say it, I will,” she teased. 

“Oh, don’t you play that bratty game now,” Gigi said, grabbing the shorter girl’s hips and bringing them closer to her. “I don’t fuck with that, baby.”

“There it is.”

“And what about it?”

“Hm, nothing.”

“Crystal,” Gigi almost-asked, beckoning the designer to look in her eyes. 

And then their mouths met, the same sensation washing over the room that was in the club just the previous night, this time unclouded by alcohol or blaring music. A sensation that neither woman could stop thinking about the entire time they’d been apart. The kiss was almost needy, it was sloppy, surely. If they wanted to they could have gone on kissing forever, exploring every inch of each other’s mouths and placing roaming hands all over— but Crystal was wrapped in a goddamn bedsheet, Gigi had just seen her naked, and they were both now horny as all hell.

Gigi left Crystal’s mouth to alternate soft bites and sucks on her collarbones, Crystal feeling the sheet about to slip off — and she let it, exhaling a low breath as she felt Gigi’s body through the other girl’s pajamas. Gigi grinned into Crystal’s chest, letting the older girl take her shirt off as she slid down her body. She grabbed one of her breasts in her hand, sucking on the nipple of the other. Crystal whined, gripping Gigi’s blonde hair and pushing her closer. The model hummed, crouching down and kissing the curly-haired girl’s lower stomach. 

“Gigi,” Crystal sighed.

“You okay, babe?” Gigi looked up, Crystal nodding and giggling a little. Gigi couldn’t help but smile at how cute her lover was, even like this.

Gigi regained her footing and guided Crystal to the bed, laying her across it placing herself between her legs. She could see the older girl squirming (more than usual) as she planted a quick kiss on her lips. 

“Ready?” she whispered.

“Of course-”

Gigi slid back down, admiring every inch of the redhead’s tan body along the way. “I’m gonna try my best for you, okay?” She reassured softly, pressing a kiss right on Crystal’s clit and causing her to exhale a whimper. The two stared at each other as Gigi licked the first line up Crystal’s folds, a shudder running up her spine. 

Every sound that came out of Crystal as Gigi swirled her tongue around the bundle of nerves at her core was like adorable, high-pitched music. She tried to pay attention to what was making her squeal more, genuinely just wanting her to feel the pleasure Gigi felt looking at her splayed out on the bed for her, hands gripping the sheets, mouth open, back arched. 

Gigi tested quick flicks of her tongue with sharper prods, the change in stimulation making Crystal moan out even more. The blonde rubbed her fingers on the wetness where her tongue had just landed as she licked around Crystal’s entrance, the sound of Crystal gasping making Gigi’s pants pool with their own liquid. She switched her fingers and her mouth, probing her digits into the other girl’s core. Crystal felt the tightness in her stomach increase tenfold when she felt Gigi enter her, knocking her head back with open lips.

“Gigi, fuck,” she moaned.

“You like that, baby?” Gigi muttered between sucks on her clit, lust clouding her brain.

“Jesus, you’re s-so good.”

“I know, that’s my last name.”

“Oh fuck—ah—fuck you!”

“Actually, I’m fucking you.”

“Well, do it more—ah, baby, that feels so amazing.”

Gigi continued at her pace, arching her fingers to hit Crystal’s g-spot, making her let out a devastatingly loud and high pitched moan. Crystal was nearly coming undone as her orgasm built up quicker and quicker. To Gigi’s amusement, her habit of saying “yeah, yeah, yeah” continued over into the bedroom. After a few more moments in this rhythm, Crystal gasped in a strangled moan as the knot in her stomach finally untied itself, releasing over Gigi’s still-pumping fingers as she guided her through the orgasm. Gigi returned to Crystal’s mouth, sighing as she touched her all over again, still energetic and still needy.

Crystal looked at her desperate lover with a smile, flipping her over onto her back and breaking the kiss, moving onto her small breasts and caressing those with her tongue. She slid her hand down Gigi’s pale skin, underneath her shorts and lack of underwear, to her clit, rubbing circular motions so that Gigi would moan herself—a much fuller and deeper sound than Crystal’s airy whines. While Crystal swore an uncharacteristically high amount when she was touched, Gigi couldn’t even form a sentence without adding at least twelve profanities between every word.

“Crystal, fuck, put your motherfucking fingers inside me right fucking now, bitch,” she gasped.

“You’re so horny!”

“Yeah, shit agh, I just watched you get fucked by my tongue, and fuck, it was hot.”

“Is this hot?” She smirked, curling her fingers into Gigi’s entrance and pumping slowly. Gigi cursed, grabbing Crystal’s hair, then scratching her back.

“You are a savage,” Crystal laughed, kissing Gigi’s cheek. 

“And you’re a fucking bottom, fuck,” she hissed. “Because you won’t fucking go faster!”

“Like this?” Crystal bit her lip, following her command with a stifled giggle.

Gigi gasped, feeling her climax coming on as her thighs tensed harder at every brush of Crystal’s fingers. “Just like that! Holy fucking shit I’m gonna cum, Crys,” she dug her nails into Crystal’s upper back, feeling herself come undone all over her lover’s fingers. 

The two collapsed onto the bed, sweaty and exhausted. 

“C’mere,” Gigi finally spoke, turning to Crystal. The designer’s makeup was slightly smudged, her curly hair frizzy and tangled, but her smile was still bright and she was still beautiful. She scooted into Gigi’s arms, pressing her head to Gigi’s chest and snaking her arms around the model’s tiny waist.

“That was fun,” Crystal sighed.

“It was more than fun. Best sex I’ve ever had.”

“Cut the cameras, deadass. Really?!”

“Really. And that’s on period.”

“…We’re insufferable, y’know?”

“Why ever would you say that?” Gigi smirked into the older girl’s hair, both chuckling.

“I miss my cat.”

Gigi laughed. “You do?!”

“Her name is Tic Tac. Do you have pets?”

“Yes! My roommates and I have a dog in LA. A little Dachshund named Wendy.”

“Do you miss her?”

“No, I hate her little pumpkin-costume wearing guts. Of course I miss her!” 

Suddenly, their conversation was cut short by a buzz coming from the other room. Crystal rolled her eyes, untangling herself from her partner’s limbs and walking to the living room (still naked, by the way) to see her phone lit up.

It was a text.

From Raven.

Crystal’s stomach dropped as she read it, scanning over the words over and over as she walked back to Gigi.

“Crys, is something wrong?” Gigi propped herself up on her elbows.

“Raven texted me,” she said without looking up, a select few words replaying through her head so that she needed to make sure they were real. “Tonight you and I have a meeting.”

“Huh. Shouldn’t Trixie tell us about that?”

Crystal bit her lip. “It’s at nine, top floor.”

“Uh huh. About what?”

Crystal looked at Gigi finally, her face pale once she realized what she was seeing wasn’t fake. She gulped. “I don’t know.”

“Okay… do we even trust Raven? Who’s this with anyway?”

Crystal brushed her bangs away with an exhale, glancing at her phone one more time.

“She says… she says it’s with Miss Fame.”

[innuendostudios]

Thoughts on Even More Games

[vague, unspecific spoilers for Heaven’s Vault, Later Alligator, and Life is Strange 2]

Thoughts on Heaven’s Vault

Heaven’s Vault is a game about archeology, which means it’s also a game about incompleteness. This is very clever. Inkle - also the developers of 80 Days, which I will play someday! - specialize in deep narratives that can be explored many, many ways, allowing for a lot of player choice. You make a lot of small decisions - do you share a discovery with the trader in exchange for a valuable item, or hide it so he doesn’t plunder it? do you go looking for your missing friend, or let her stay missing in case there are people trying to follow you to her? These all have their own little arcs and resolutions, and there are so many of them, and so many ways they can play out, that the game can never be played the same way twice. The overall story begins and ends in the same place and theoretically hits the same major beats, but the journey is tailored broadly and finely to each player; it’s a style of design Aaron A. Reed refers to as “not... a branching tree but a braided rope.”

Making a narrative about archeology is how you dodge the exponentially complicated nature of that design: if there are dozens of locations, characters, plot threads, bits of color, which can be engaged with at many points in time, or ignored, or dropped by the player halfway through, how do you avoid telling a story full of gaps and dead ends? Well... you don’t. Having only partial information and having to infer the rest is what archeology is.

The protagonist of Heaven’s Vault, Aliya, is digging up the secrets of an ancient civilization, having been sent by her academy to find a researcher who’s gone missing, and stumbling into his incredible discovery. Everywhere she goes, there are holes: she has partial understanding of the researcher’s journey and motives; he, in turn, had partial understanding of the mystery he was uncovering, and Aliya has only fragments of his knowledge; the ancient texts she translates are usually fragments of larger works, and she is guessing at the meanings of many of the words; the game’s constantly updating historical timeline has entire centuries with nothing but question marks. Aliya arrives in a new location and wonders aloud to her robot companion about what this place was, when it was founded, when it was abandoned, how her predecessor found his way her and where he went next and what he took with him.

The constant feeling of discovery - of unearthing - is magnificent. Site after site, I asked, “What is this place?” Always thinking, if the eventual answer is any good, this is going to be one of the best games I’ve ever played. And, in the end, it doesn’t give you an answer, it just give you enough to make the story feel complete. It answers by not answering.

Also, translating alien texts is just extremely my jam. I’m the weirdo who enjoyed the ending of Arrival but secretly wished the whole movie had been about xenolinguistics like the first half. I guess Inkle felt similar.

The game’s by no means perfect. I think I enjoyed the sailing between worlds more than most - it’s slow, but very pretty - but it’s going to discourage a replay. I don’t think the relationship between Aliya and her robot, Six, ever gets terribly interesting. Some of the archeology is a little too obviously game-y - sail around, wait to find a random ruin, beam Six down to grab an ancient doodad, translate a bit of text, lo and behold it’s from one of the sites you’re looking for and it’s narrowed your search radius somehow. (It gives Star Trek explanations the first few times - e.g. “it has radiation that only exists in one part of the nebula” - and then stops bothering.) And the game sags a little in the middle; it could’ve hacked out 3 or 4 dig sites and still given me the same experience.

But, all told, there’s magic in it, and it just feels good to be there. Do not sleep on this one.

Thoughts on Later Alligator

There’s not a ton to say about this game except that is charming as hell. Lindsay and Alex Small-Butera have build a beautifully animated world of cute alligators, one of whom is having a birthday party where he’s convinced he’s going to be murdered. He wants you to run around getting information out of everyone who’s going to be there, which you get by completing minigames. It’s a cast of weird and funny characters with weird and funny dialogue and there’s not much more to it than that.

The design can be a little frustrating. Some minigames, if you lose, you don’t get to try again. Some are annoyingly finicky. You need to complete them all to get the true ending, which means, in my case, playing the game three times to complete all the bits you missed or got locked out of. The ending was a little different each time, so it wasn’t a total wash, but the game’s on a timer that only advances when you play a game or take the bus, and once you’ve completed most of the games there’s a lot of traveling back and forth from one nowhere to another just to advance time to the next unskippable plot beat.

(It’s also a little unclear what you’re missing as you try to get the final ending, as some of the ongoing puzzle are optional.)

But I can’t get mad. The game is too damn cute! Each character is lively and unique, with tons of personality, and the dialogue is just clever enough not to fall into empty adorkability.

It good.

Thoughts on Life is Strange 2

Somewhere, early in the development of Life is Strange 2, some Dontnod employee wrote in a design document “Episode 4 - cult?” (but in French) and nobody told them “no.”

I will not forgive them for this,

After twenty minutes of LiS2, I was ready to yell at everyone who had reported it was boring. It has one of the most powerful, gut-punching openings of any game I’ve played in recent memory. And all through the first, second, and third episodes, I was in love. Unlike Before the Storm, this was its own creature, willing to make dramatic departures from the original game’s template. Instead of controlling a character with supernatural powers, you play as the superpowered character’s older brother. The one with the magic is a 9-year-old, unable to fully understand or control his abilities, suffering a recent trauma, and needing to be guided through a dangerous and racist world. All the ambition missing from Before the Storm is back, and this time the animation isn’t creepy and the writing is wildly improved (thanks to some journeyman script work from Fullbright’s Steve Gaynor) and I even have a computer able to play it on higher graphical settings.

But nothing good lasts.

Everything good about the series screeches to a halt in Episode 4, the one where some asshole said “cult?” and didn’t get a Nerf football thrown at their head. And it’s not just that it’s a terrible idea; it’s actually sort of amazing how much the game relies on an alchemy of plot, tone, theme, and writing, and how a slight imbalance can throw the whole thing off. Episode 4 has scene after scene that are powerful in their conception - brothers reunited after a violent rift; a boy having his first conversation with his estranged mother in nearly a decade; getting interrogated by the feds for a crime that can’t even be explained by physics - fall flat because the writers can’t think of anything interesting for the characters to say. (Steve Gaynor’s name stops appearing in the credits as of this episode.)

And here the game’s rickety bits, kept delicately together for three episodes, start to shake apart. Dontnod’s overly-earnest voice direction, which I didn’t notice in the early episodes, started to wear me down. (”Could you sigh mid-syllable, like you’re slightly overwhelmed with emotion?” “Sure, on which line?” “All of them.”) The thinness of the secondary characters, most of whom pop up for one episode and disappear, became more noticeable. The lack of a mechanical hook like the time rewinding of the original game, and the attendant commentary on choice-based games and power fantasies, made the game feel less substantial. The surreal imagery of the original, obligatorily evoked in the prequel, is sensibly absent, but there’s nothing equally striking that replaces it. Even the branching path decisions become less clear: the end-of-episode stat screens for the final episodes mentioned at least a dozen choices I didn’t even know I’d made, some of which were critical in shaping my younger brother’s morality and were not necessarily the choices I’d have made if I’d known I was making a choice at all.

Come the final episode, I got An Ending that seemed right for the way I’d played, but much of the way I’d played felt accidental.

So what are we to make of this? Life is Strange is a beautiful disaster, an ambitious disaster, where Life is Strange 2 is almost less interesting for being  more competent. It has a huge mess of charged topics - American racism, teens losing their virginity, raising a child outside the nuclear family, grief and trauma - and, while it handles them without the gracelessness and sledgehammer subtlety of the original, it doesn’t come to any conclusions about any of them. LiS1, for all its jank, had some opinions, where LiS2 falls into the category of “this sure is some shit, innit?” games.

It starts with a powerful premise, deeply relatable characters, fine writing, beautiful art, but can’t even manage, in the end, to be a disaster. It is the only game in the series so far to be forgettable.