#I try to keep an eye out for new shows and creators. This is mostly because I am an obnoxious hipster at heart (half a joke)

[boombox-fuckboy]

Don't really have a question. I just think it's really rad that you run this blog and manage to keep up with so many new creators. Keep being a cool person who does cool things.

I appreciate this more than I can articulate.

And I like your show, too! Especially fond of Captain Winnipeg, though B is an endless source of interest. So excited to hear where things are headed.

[lovesickeros]

can.. can I ask for an affectionate reader with characters who aren’t normally like… used to the love? like, not just through words but physical affection like hand-holding, kisses, hugs, all that shebang. probably with a few people like yelan, ei, basically any character that is either cut-off from society or seems socially distant or isolated. 😞

☆ affectionate reader with yelan, ei, & furina

[ 4.2 Archon Quest spoilers ]

× yelan

Varies between how you display your affection, to be honest. Just like being affectionate with people? She's cool with it as long as you don't pop by while she's working (mostly because she'll end up dragging you into it for a bit of fun). I don't think she's all that touchy feely herself, but she'll absolutely get you gifts instead– like pretty knick nacks? She'll make sure to snag any she thinks you might like. Like a good meal? Sure, she'll take you out to one of the restaurants in the city, doesn't matter how expensive. Her treat. If you do prefer physical gifts rather then being taken out, you'll eventually get used to the random unmarked letters and packages showing up where your staying pretty often. It's obvious to know who it came from even if she never signs anything.

Flirty reader, though? Whole nother can of worms and now it's a challenge. The more confident you are the more interested she is. The other acolytes would absolutely seethe at the idea but she has no hesitation at just straight up flirting back– she's as charismatic as they come and she's got a poker face that's basically impenetrable. She'll probably also make a bet to see who cracks first (she always wins, unsurprisingly). Probably won't get dragged into any of her schemes this way but if you ask politely maybe she'll consider it, anyway.

The smell of freshly brewed tea and the clatter of dice across wood was a common sight at the Yanshang Teahouse– less common was the woman secluded in the far corner, her lips pulled into a grin that flashed fangs and a look that would scare off the most confident of men.

She'd normally try to scope out any new blood that'd made the mistake of stepping into her teahouse and was equally stupid enough to accept a gamble against her just for the thrill of it, but she was far too absorbed in the warm body at her side, one of her die clasped tightly in their hand as she guided them through the motions– they had a knack for it, she had to admit. The thought made her preen, the clatter of the die as it rolled across the table giving her that subtle, familiar rush.

Even if she knew exactly where it'd land.

"Six. Hm, maybe you're just lucky," She muses, plucking the die from the table and holding it up to her eye like a prized jewel, "Or maybe you're not as innocent as you'd have us believe." There's a sharp glint in her eyes at the prospect, but everyone else has the sense to keep their heads down and their words to themselves as she tosses the die herself.

"So why don't we find out and make a bet, just between you and me?"

× ei

Varies between Ei and the Shogun, because you'll probably be seeing either as much as the other. Sometimes you gotta really squint to tell who it is sometimes, but you get used to it. Both are fairly similar, though, in that their first instinct (especially in public) is to tense up like you're about to attack them or something. Difference is Ei eventually relaxes after a solid minute of trying to process your sudden affection and, if no one else is around, she might even reciprocate. Just don't tease her for being a little stiff and awkward about it, she's trying. That's what happens when your only company is a robot and uh. Nothing. For like 500 years. She's trying. Raiden, on the other hand, is just about as awkward as you can imagine. She's polite (blunt) about it because Ei is fond of you and also you are. The Creator. But she's not really built to deal with personal relationships and so she doesn't know how to deal with affection.

..Depending on what you do you may or may not blue screen Ei hard enough that she retreats back to PoE

Ei usually isn't fond of sitting still, unless it's to meditate. At least then she goes in with a purpose, something to achieve– but now, she's just focused on trying not to make a fool of herself. Her muscles are starting to ache from how hard she's tensing, though, in an effort to sit as straight and still as possible as their hands glide through her hair, weaving it into a single braid.

She can just barely hear the subtle lilt of their voice as they hum– and though it is soothing, it is also..very distracting. She can't focus long enough to try and meditate, too lost in the gentle rise and fall of their voice and the care they take to braid her hair. If she'd had a heart, she'd sure it'd be beating so wildly against her ribcage they could hear it.

But then it stops– their hands fall back to their sides and their humming falters. She freezes, too, racking her brain for any slights she must have committed. Instead, she is met with a calm, tender touch on the back of her neck, making her inhale sharply.

"Am I making you uncomfortable, Ei? You're so tense.." She has to grit her teeth to stop herself from bowing so low her head presses against the ground, her hands folded in her lap, clenching instinctively. "..No, Divine One." She answers simply, trying to contain the adoration swelling in her chest.

Yet as much as she tries to relax, to ease their worries, she finds that she cannot.

"Hm." That small murmur, a simple sound that nearly made her jump, was the only warning she got before they scooted closer, wrapping their arms around her stomach and resting their chin on her shoulder with a grin she would liken to Miko's, if she dared to make such a comparison. "Really?"

She swears she must've been feverish at the affection, lightheaded and dazed until she thought she might simply perish at the brush of their hands against her own.

Much to her embarrassment, however, she doesn't realize she's instinctively pulled back into Plane of Euthymia until she sees the familiar dull purples engulf her vision once again.

Though only a small solace, it seemed a little..brighter, this time.

× furina

Varies between pre 4.2 and post 4.2 archon quests to be honest.

Pre 4.2 she comes off as very vain– of course the most Divine would see fit to spoil her with affection! She deserves it, and is obviously their favorite! Just don't look too hard because she's terrible at hiding how flustered she actually is. Absolutely goes home right after and screams into her pillow for at least thirty minutes minimum.

Post 4.2 she's a lot more openly bashful and flustered. She's really not used to affection and even the smallest show of it has her folding immediately. Now that she doesn't need to worry about being found out she's a lot more receptive to affection. Cup her cheeks and compliment her and her knees are buckling. Like. Especially weak for compliments and praise (she deserves it. please spoil her).

She swears she must be hallucinating– she had been having trouble sleeping recently. But..no. The visage of the Creator was as real as the sweat beading on her brow as she stared at them for a long, awkward moment. Should..she let them in? But then they'd see the pathetic state she was in, and the last thing she wanted to do was make a fool of herself in front of them-!

Her choice was quickly made for her, anyway, as she let out an undignified squeak of surprise when they suddenly tugged her forward into their chest, enclosing her in a hug.

Her first reaction was to freeze– her second was becoming absolutely flustered, her cheeks flushing a soft pink and her mouth closing and opening as she tried to find her words.

"I– ah..um." She stumbled over her words instead, floundering like a fish out of water. Yet she felt a distinct sense of emptiness wash over her when they finally pulled back, looking a touch sheepish. "Sorry, sorry– you just looked like you needed a hug."

The silence spoke for itself, her shoulders tensing slightly. But the way the concern and affection bled through their voice made her waver, her hands trembling as she let out a shaky breath that almost sounded like a sigh.

"It's..It's fine! Fine, I'm fine." She repeated, trying desperately to ignored the way her voice cracked and how hot her face felt– though it was more an attempt to affirm herself that she was not thinking about how warm they felt, how much she..actually enjoyed the hug. She wasn't thinking about it all! Absolutely not!

..Maybe a little.

"Just warn me next time, please?"

[ode-to-an-inkwell]

I have an opinion question based on if kit and Sophie played Sansa and Jon with a romantic tension the same way Alan rickman played snape with a sense of empathy because he was told the out come or the books before they were released. Like maybe Martin told them their ending and the writers of the show didn’t care.

Hey, thanks for the ask!

So, I think the basis of the question is whether Sophie and Kit’s acting had romantic tension in the show. Tension can’t really be measured, mostly observed. Many of us share the observation of a Jonsa romance, and while perceptions can be argued, I believe there’s more to it than that.

As you said, it could be an instance where the actors intentionally portrayed the characters this way—with intense eye contact and heavy breathing. While we may never know if there was some kind of communication to them from GRRM, I try to keep in mind that it wasn’t just acting choice that contributed to the atmosphere between Jon and Sansa.

Costumes, cinematography, framing, editing, even writing all contributed to their romantic tension. Many of their scenes were intimate, not just physically in the space but in the topics of conversation, as well. They’re often framed together, and the editors chose to use shots that included lingering looks, holding hands, etc. Their costumes are reflective of each other, and Sansa even wears Jon’s cloak before she makes him a new one.

The writing poses their relationship as unfamiliar until they grow into partners. It’s revealed that Jon is Sansa’s cousin seconds before they’re in frame again. As he’s made KitN, he looks to Sansa. The writing also makes a distinction between Jon’s other relationships, such as his familial bond with Arya and Bran. Sansa is the person he trusts the most, and he proves that when he chooses her over everything else time and again.

My personal theory (just from my own observations) is that the idea of their romance was at the very least toyed with in the writing room. They may have wanted its possibility without fully committing to it, or to at least hint at something that could be in the books. There were too many deliberate choices made by the creators—even in the romantic tropes used to show Jon and Sansa’s bond and loyalty to each other—for their romantic tension to have no intentionality.

Sorry for rambling, lol. Thanks again for stopping by 💛💛💛

[the-s1lly-corner]

"And what will you do when I can't recognize you?"

Eyeless jack x reader angst but it's based around my specific hc that "jack is cursed bc cult stuff and hes forced to eat flesh; and his mind and body are degrading into something not.. human"

So yeah basically reader and jack trying to cope with his whole monster metamorphosis

Cw. For body horror, and tbh this is mostly me rattling on about my hcs of how jack became eyeless jack

That was something he said to you one night, unprompted

Of course you both had a vague idea of what was happening to him; but neither of you had answers... let alone fully understood

Of course, he knew more than you. He was the one living with this... curse.. and he had it before the two of you met

But even now, it was showing how ugly things could get, and it was only the beginning

Obviously; his appearance was changing. His skin became.. cold, veins were showing, he simply looked like he was dying. Obviously, he had pits for eyes, which were constantly dripping this cold black ooze. His ears and teeth were now pointed, and his fingers ended in claws. But other than that; he more or less looked like a normal person, if you overlooked those silly details

Oh, his tongue.. no matter how you may feel about it, the process of how he "obtained" the monstrous thing is horrifying.

To spare the details, his original tongue essentially split into the half dozen tendrils it is today

Not good stuff, and he felt all of it

And of course there's the psychological and behavioral effects of the curse; to get the big bad out of the way, he can no longer eat normal food. No need to elaborate. Good news is, as of now, he doesnt need to feed often. But when he does, he runs the risk of losing control, almost becoming animalistic in the way he behaves

That's his main fear

He's expressed that those frenzies happen he finds it harder and harder to contain himself, or come back down

He worries that one day you'll be the one getting chomped on

Really, there's nothing either of you can do to stop this or lessen the effects of the curse

Bro only has two options; suck it up and become a monster that can't resemble anything of this world. Or die

There already were some nights where he may have snipped at you. He didn't mean to be aggressive, but he was trying so hard to keep it together. He needed you to leave the area and stay away for a while

Some days his memories begin to cloud, that's probably the scariest for him. It'd be scary for everyone, obviously

I dont typically like writing angst without adding some sort of comfort, or happy ending, but that sort of thing just. Doesnt exist here. Jack's fate is pretty much sealed, and what sucks is that he didnt ask to be dragged into this

This is all sorta based off that spin off backstory jack got (though tbf I dont recall if it was even made by his original creator, though my take is in a silly au), where he makes friends who are (unbeknownst to him) in a cult and had plans to use him

Bro didn't want this, and really the whole thing is tragic

Of course, I'll still try to add some comfort, as it feels wrong to just drag this man around like this

Smells seem to have a positive response

Makes sense; its said that the brain ties smells to memories, and associating it with certain things

So if you wear a certain perfume or use a certain detergent to wash clothing, he'll definitely remember and recognize it. It seems to help him come down after a bad spot

Journaling can help him keep track of the days; though you'll need to give him some time on that... hard to hold pencils when you have claws..

And of course, comfort him; be there for him

I wish I could end this kinda bummer hc ramble off on a lighter note, but the whole thing/this side of eyeless jack is just so

You know?

Anyways yeah I write all my eyeless jack stuff with these ideas in mind so

Yeah, that's why I tend to write EJ all gloomy and reclusive

[ls-true-successor]

How I think Near would react to a new hostile Kira appearing

Based off of a conversation I had helping a friend with their death note OC

In A-Kira, a new Kira does appear again but Near is more calm because the Kira doesn't seem to be killing anyone and instead is just trying to sell the notebook. (The ending of A-Kira was so unfair btw)

Near stays mostly inactive in A-Kira and let's it all play out,

but if a killer Kira showed up (let's say in his late twenties maybe even early thirties so around the same age he was in A-Kira) he would work with more haste.

This is not very thought out but here are some ideas:

First time hearing about a new Kira he's been on auto pilot for years, it takes a moment to register this isn't another nightmare, his expressionless face pulls down to disappointment and you would think the person who told him the news was Kira themself.

BIG opportunity for Near to be a true online troll posting on his anti-Kira Twitter account "imagine your mentor being a huge failure" quickly deletes the tweet after realizing his mentor is a huge failure.

Definitely controlling a lot of news sites and other forms of media, probably even running/the creator of big names and makes it so you won't be able to go anywhere online or offline without hearing Kira hate/critism or even genuine articles trying to get Kira to reach out for mental help and give up.

Think he'd accidentally or purposely base some of his actions on "history repeats itself", for example keeping extra close eyes on Japan and people who match Lights pre-Kira and post-Kira life.

think he'd set up fake Kira supporter websites that log everyone who made accounts, posted, or even did anything anomalously just to get public opinions and the public's theories on Kira.

Obviously it's all very based on circumstances since Near is a very adaptable guy, perhaps tell me how Near would react to your Kira OCS! :3

[smallsimmer]

Hi! I've been a follower for awhile of you and Sara as I play TS3!

I started becoming a creator and learning to Convert 4to3 items in my game which has been so fun for me.

I tend to love a certain style that I can't find in most cc creators so I want to make my own eyes, skins, skin details/ tattoos etc. to make my sims.

To keep it short is there any tutorials you learned from on how to make skin and eyes and tattoos? Any tips you could give to help out someone who is trying to learn themselves and start a simblr?

Hello!! That is definitely why Sara and I started making stuff, it makes your sims feel more like your own characters when you can add the personalized touches yourself. Sara and I have been skin blending for a long time (around since 2016 I wanna say) and we're mostly self taught, I don't remember a lot of people wanting to share their skin blending techniques back in the day. The most I can do is to link you to here and browse through their tutorials they have shared. The other basic tips I can share is that Sara and I use the 3D mode in photoshop for all of our skins, you'll need to get .dae files to open in photoshop which you can find here, find a base skin, doesn't have to be terribly detailed just so you know where the eyelids, nose, and mouth should go as well as the ears. Make sure you make a new layer before pasting whatever details you want to add otherwise when you merge it down on the 3D side it'll go onto whichever layer you were on (then you gotta completely redo it and it's a pain in the ass). ALSO! You can use liquify to move stuff around better in the 3d mode, I use multiply when placing stuff first so I can line it up where it needs to go. I've also seen some skins where people haven't matched the scalp correctly or there's a line where the body and the head meet, my trade secret is to use the eyedrop tool and grab the color on the face dds then just paste it completely in the scalp and on the body I use a soft brush and drag it over the very top of the neck on the body dds. As for eyes and tattoos, eyes are definitely like making makeup in the regard that you can make them recolorable and they go in the makeup category so if you have any experience with that it's not too hard, just make sure if they're not recolorable to set the color in TSRW to white so they show up properly in game. Tattoos I always add directly to my sims skins, accessory tattoos look awful in game, they glare under the light and they're blurry, easier to just add them to the skin, for the body you can just paste them on in 2D but for face tats I recommend using the 3D mode instead because of warping, black tattoo with a white background I tend most of the time to set the layer to multiply and it looks fine.

For examples of tattoos warping:

You want the tattoo to be here so if we place it like so in the 2D mode it looks fine right?

Wrong because it is going to look like this in game

So instead paste it in 3D mode like so and then merge it down

It'll look like this in the 2D mode but it's fine! It'll look correct in game!

I was kinda spit balling but I hope this helps even a tiny tiny bit!

[angelofchaos001]

Wave to your local chaos idiot!

Hi, I'm Angel, artist, writer, and dumbass extraordinaire! I mainly stick to Fandoms for my works, since I'm not the best at coming up with strictly my own ideas (Ask some of my friends, I've been trying to make my own world not based in any fandom for two years now with almost no success). Just because I stick to Fandoms does not mean I don't enjoy seeing stuff outside of Fandoms, I love seeing fun ideas bloom into something the creator truly enjoys!

Like my profile says, here's some basic things about me! I go by She/Her, and I'm somewhere on the LGBTQ+ spectrum (Still questioning it, it's just not straight I know). I'm a minor, and a furry as well, but some other neat things to know that aren't on my profile include that I'm American (Send help this country is burning down), and neurodivergent (Anxiety is amazing).

Also, wave to your other local chaos idiot, @doodlebug091 (My beloved)

I'm on ArtFight!

Wanna try your hand at my shipping bingo card?

I migrated from Fandom to Tumblr, though you can still find me on the former as Angel Of Madness 001. I've even spotted a few people I know from Fandom on here!

When Can I Talk to You?

You can send in asks whenever they're open! Here's a list of some stuff I do commonly.

-AU/OC Ramblings (I'll talk about my things for hours if you let me)

-Roleplays (I'm bored usually)

-Legitimate questions (Of course, I don't bite!)

-Talking about my interests (Fuck yeah, I'd love it)

-Art requests or trades (Yep! I don't do art for money yet, mainly due to lack of a proper online money service such as Venmo or Paypal)

Don't feel like you have to stick to the list, either!

Here's some other questions to get to know me better!

What do you do on Tumblr?

I write fanfiction, make OC's, draw/write comics, and make AU's for various pieces of media I enjoy. I also love to find others who make similar content, especially AU's, since others' ideas can be so cool at times.

Tumblr happens to be my catch-all for sharing new ideas, making jokes, and meeting others who share my interests.

What do you enjoy outside of the internet?

When I'm not online, I like to keep a busy life still! Usually I'm drawing-traditionally or digitally-, reading, cooking, or thinking up new ideas for my art, AU's, or other projects! Sometimes, I hang out with my friends, though we mostly keep in contact through the internet.

Obviously, I also like to game. Excluding my video games, I play Magic: The Gathering and Dungeons & Dragons the most. Including them, however, I mostly play Rain World and Pokemon. The kinds of games I tend to like are ones with heavy lore, but from an actual gaming standpoint I tend to play 2D and 3D platformers, deckbuilders, and turn based RPG's.

What do you want to do in life?

My hope is to become an ecologist, since I've loved animals for my whole life and have been branching that out to loving anything nature related. Biology often finds a way to creep itself into my fictional works, and I tend to look at things through a very scientific eye.

Tell us some more hobbies!

Alright, okay. I love Dungeons and Dragons, even though I'm stuck as the forever DM. I sing, travel, play the violin, and love watching mildly educational YouTubers (Oversimplified and such). I'm also quite the animal lover, with two precious cats and five snakes!

What Fandoms are you part of?

Alright, here's the list, broken into sections! Note that these are just the media that I actively talk about/participate in chats about/make AU's or OC's with. I still watch, play, or read other things!

Italic text means that I have not finished the media and do not want spoilers.

Colored text means a current hyperfixation.

Shows/Movies

-Helluva Boss

-Hazbin Hotel

-Murder Drones

-The Amazing Digital Circus

-Arcane

Games

-Hollow Knight

-Rain World

-Slime Rancher

-Outer Wilds

-Pokemon

-A Hat in Time

-Inscyption

-Worldless

Books, Comics, and Other

-Bugtopia

-Wings of Fire

-Warriors

-Percy Jackson

Side Blogs

@monarchtonone (RW Iterator)

@nine-drops-of-iron (RW Iterator)

@ask-wings-of-rain (Ask, Chat, or RP with anyone from my Wings of Rain AU)

@the-rot-parasite (Ask, Chat, or RP with The Parasite)

@ask-the-splitmind-au (Ask, Chat, or RP with anyone from my Splitmind AU)

Unique Tags

#Wings of Rain (Wings of Rain content, WoF x RW AU)

#season of blood (Season of Blood content, Warriors AU of 'If Scourge Won')

#shared sparks (Shared Sparks content, a Firecracker fancomic)

#splitmind au / #rw splitmind au (The Splitmind AU for Rain World, where Iterators have shared bodies with the slugcats)

#fallen-angel-rambling (Vent posts; Very rare but do happen)

#art-of-chaos (Art by me!)

Links to all current comics (on Tumblr)

The Story of the Iterators

Within a local group of iterators, there are stories to tell and lives that unfold, hidden just beneath a layer of dust settled on old memories. Taking a glimpse into their lives, these purposed machines of flesh and iron to solve one goal, may reveal why they turned out the way they did.

Shared Sparks (A @firecracker-pup fancomic)

Blight was the lucky pup. The one who survived at the cost of her sister's life. Ever since, she tried to live up to what she thought her sister could have managed, but was stuck in her shadow. Timelines away, Firecracker had been left to the mercy of scavengers after stealing a pearl from them as a pup, only to end up adopted by them. A call inside of it, however, still wants to learn from slugcats the things it never got to.

When their paths cross, when timelines collide, both slugcats get a glimpse into a world they never knew existed, and find similarities buried in the vast differences of their lives.

Season of Blood

Scourge has won the Battle of Blood clan with the death of Firestar and all who oppose him. The Clans are united in the forest once more, but under the cruel rule of the small tom cat. He rules with an iron paw and has no sympathy for others. Every cat has been stripped of their warrior name and given a more fitting one, by Scourge's definition. Many have been killed for displeasing him, or for minor physical imperfections. Anyone with open ties to StarClan have also been killed.

Because of a Medicine's Cat's close ties to the spectral clan, only one remains. Racoon was only a Medicine Cat apprentice when Scourge took over, but now that she's grown, all duties of the job fall to her. Tending to a massive, bloodthirsty clan isn't a small task. It's demanding, exhausting, and the whole time, she has to hide every notion that StarClan still visits her in her dreams. A single meek kitten must find a way to grow up and face the challenges ahead, persist through times of hardship, and find it in herself to risk her life to save the forest-and all the cats in it.

Greenleaf is over. The Season of Blood has begun . . .

All Current AU's (On Tumblr)

Wings of Rain (Wings of Fire x Rain World crossover AU)

Splitmind AU (Rain World, Iterators live in the slugcats' heads as a last-ditch effort to ascend)

Season of Blood (Warrior Cats AU, 'What if Scourge won?')

Link to fanfics (Yep. I'm on Ao3)

Stranded in the Rain (Outer Wilds and Rain World crossover)

Quick doodles of some sonas:

-Angel (Worldless)

-Akoya (Rain World)

-Pastel (Fursona)

-Rose-Gold (Wings of Fire)

-Junebug (Fursona)

-Crowned Crystal (Rain World)

[kageyuji]

Hii! This is my first time trying this, but do you have any advice for starting and building a writing blog?

I've been wanting to start one for a while but I'm not sure how to gain followers and stuff.

hi!! no worries :D and tbh.. i’m not exactly sure LMAO despite it seeming like i have my shit together i Do Not. but!! i can give you some general things/ideas:

write for yourself. write what makes you happy and what you genuinely want to write. despite how much of a people-pleaser i am, it’s also really important to remember that this is a hobby and if you write things you don’t really want to write, it’s going to show through your work but it’s also going to burn you out quickly.

(that said, if you are writing for x reader content make sure your reader is ambiguous. having a character be a 5’4 brunette with a knack for baking is cool sometimes, but it’s also a very slim audience and it’s going to throw some people off)

similarly, don’t compare yourself to other creators and don’t compare yourself to.. yourself. if you have something that does really good, and then you post the next week and it does shit, that’s okay! sometimes tumblr algorithm is just shit. sometimes certain characters are more of a fan favorite. but, also remember that people who have already built a large following are going to have more notes. just don’t get discouraged easily — every fic is something entirely new and it shouldn’t be weighed off of someone else or an entirely different work.

make a masterlist, and make it organized. if you write for a lot of characters and use different posting types this can get really confusing, but look around at other places or play around with it until you find something that you think feels right.

watch your blog activity (once you start posting, anyway). i believe mobile doesn’t have it, but on desktop (or just login to tumblr from your phones browser app lol) there is a little icon that will show interactions with your posts/blog and you can ask it to show the chart based on time of day, weekly basis, etc. post accordingly to that, and hopefully your posts will gain a little more traction :)

aesthetic is (unfortunately) pretty important in my opinion. of course, if you have the most well written thing i’ve seen i’m going to ignore the kinks but i’m also going to be a lot more likely to read things that are organized well. this is mostly about fics to catch someone’s eye, although this bleeds into your actual blog as well.

(pinterest has lots of cool stuff for aesthetics. twitter layout blogs also usually have a lot of good headers. if you want dividers, you can search the “dividers” tag on tumblr or there’s loads of mobile apps to get the thin color strip dividers like i use.)

similarly, try to make your pinned/navi organized and easy to follow. in my personal opinion, i like adding things like rules/dni, tag guides, and especially masterlists linked somewhere in the post. although, again, it’s up to personal opinion on what exactly you want to link there. as long as it’s organized and somewhat simple, you’re good.

as far as a masterlist and rules go, i would recommend laying out certain things beforehand, like what characters you’re going to write for and hard “no”s. as much as i love people on tumblr, sometimes they just cannot read — it helped me a lot whenever i was new to tell myself “hey, i don’t have to do that. it says that right here and it’s not my fault that they didn’t see that!”

(i also added a little rule that said “if you actually read this, add a ‘<3’ in your asks so i know” LOL it helped me filter requests between who actually cared to read my rules and who didn’t)

add tags to your fics. add so many tags. add many more tags than you think you probably need. add so many tags that you get sick of them — that’s how people are going to find you.

try to keep anonymous asks on, that’s where a lot of interaction comes from. ik people can be dicks sometimes but there’s also a lot of shy people on tumblr. probably 90% of my asks are from anons and i use anon 90% of the time whenever i send asks (especially to my moots bc they’re scary :[ lol)

just generally be nice to people. you don’t have to go out of your way to send love letters to everyone on your feed, but i’ve found that just leaving a little “i hope you enjoy reading this” or something similar as a little note helps my mental for some reason, but it also (hopefully) makes me seem a little less intimidating

[qcellbit]

while we're on that topic, I don't like how most of the fandom handles toxicity

like yes the Brazilian fandom is the one with the most toxicity but that's due to proportion. however it's one thing to acknowledge that and it's another thing to everytime there's something related to it going "oh it's the Brazilians again" when the same energy isn't kept for other communities.

The toxic part of the Hispanic community harassed pomme/pomme's admin over the landmine thing, but I never saw I single comment like "oh it's the Hispanics"

People were being aggressive in the quotes and comments of the Cellbit English update accounts when they briefly mentioned the possibility of nerfing armor, and no one cared about it.

Some people somehow twist and try to blame the Brazilian community for having ccs no longer being active in the project, when the ccs that stopped being active for a while mostly left after being harassed by the toxic part of the Hispanic community over the eggs, when there weren't even any Brazilian CCs in the project. People get mad at the Brazilians by possible situations that aren't even happening.

Again, I do agree that there's a large rate of toxicity and that's something that needs to be solved within the Brazilian community, but I hate that the energy is completely different when other communities are being toxic. I also hate the generalization of people going "oh it's the Brazilians" when the Brazilians are also the ones that triplicated Fit's sub goal and constantly help Maxo with his subs so he can keep his contract with twitch.

^^^ YUP i was literally just about to make a post about this after witnessing history repeating itself once again with spreen's comments yesterday/today. (tldr: spreen engaged in racist jokes in a video a few months ago and when prompted by brazilian fans to apologise or at least offer an explanation for his hurtful behaviour, he immaturely doubled down and blamed the brazilian community for his absence from the qsmp which is petty and false because he wasn't active well before the brazilians even arrived.)

the fact that this vitriol is always most prominent every time brazilian fans have called out racism from content creators and their communities speaks volumes of where this attitude actually comes from. the desire to actually criticise certain topics and open discussions being generalised as "toxicity" in fandom spaces isn't anything new, nor is the phenomenon of content creators refusing to apologise for jokes in poor taste/disrespectful behaviour due to ego and instead directing hate towards adjacent communities, but the unfortunate side effect of the qsmp having multiple communities split by culture and language is that people now have the ability to direct all that hate towards a specific group of people based on what country they're from and what language they speak. existing unchecked xenophobic and racist ideals from these people have resulted in fingers being pointed exclusively at the brazilian community. and for that same reason, when a brazilian content creator is being unfairly harassed for nonsensical reasons inside roleplay, it's often only ever the brazilian fans who show solidarity whilst other communities either turn a blind eye or are the ones engaging in that harassment themselves.

and while yes, there are toxic parts of literally any fanbase because fanbases are inherently made up of multiple people with differing ideals and opinions, what is often being labelled as excessive drama or toxicity by people outside of the brazilian community isn't even drama or toxicity - every time anything like this happens it's just another case of brazilian fans not exhibiting the same tolerance for bigotry that is normalised in online fandom and streaming content and demanding apologies for that behaviour.

you touched on it at the end, but yeah! all of this phenomenon is especially heartbreaking when you consider the amount of kindness exhibited by the brazilian community towards all aspects of the project, and the brazilian content creators making an effort to actively call out and minimise toxicity towards other content creators themselves. cellbit compiling a blocklist of chat members spewing hateful messages during intense roleplay to then share with fellow content creators was unprecedented in the realm of livestreamed minecraft roleplay.

the general attitude towards the brazilian community is absolutely fucking atrocious and unwarranted - just plain racism and xenophobia. an unforgivable act of using an entire ethnicity as a scapegoat for every problem under the sun. it hurts me to see comments from the brazilian community expressing fears of exclusion and that brazilian fans only have each other to rely on in times of distress - despite how difficult a lot of people want to make things, you're not alone and your presence in the qsmp fanbase is immensely appreciated. never forget that the qsmp would be nothing without you.

[sapphoagapova]

The unstablings lore recap... Technically Ravonna recap

Original characters: Ravonna Marin & Aiko Suzuki, the unstablings

Disclaimer: Aiko Suzuki is not my Oc!! It is @pan-simist and they allowed me to post their Oc on my Tumblr post!

Taglist: @biggestmitskifan

Born to have speed, cursed to be in youth, ███████ was created by a God, born before humans existed. A group of Elysians were made to gather history, study its inhabitants, and offer knowledge to the people of earth.

Ravonna is the name she took.

She watched as people die in wars in inventions she helped create; seeing the chaos, they vowed to stray away from them, only having the Elysians as her family.

Even then… they also strayed away. She felt angry, betrayed, and most of all abandoned.

She yearned companionship yet they always go, following death as they guided them away.

Despite having the speed of sound, she always stuck to history, never moving forward.

Until… 2019, summer of ████, Ravonna was speeding through the city of New York with stolen food in hand until she was roped into a crime scene, becoming a suspect by accident.

Tsuki Hagekure questioned her and was about to let her go, but… She had no government documents, no medical records; it was like she never existed. He decided to take it upon himself to keep an eye on the "thirteen-year-old" girl.

After admitting she has no home, Tsuki offered her to stay at his place, expecting him and him only to live alone. She was welcomed by his brother, Hikaru; his cousin, Sora; and… someone who is entirely unrelated, Aiko.

Soon, she'll learn to open herself again, trust them, and make friendships. But, for now, she'll stay in the dark.

So, Ravonna Marin was born with super speed and immortality along with other Elysians like Anthony and Diana, who I drew and posted! She is Romani, and she was born in a teen's body by her creator.

She is essentially kind of like a doll… robot... anything but human, I'd say.

She has a lot of abandonment issues, and she is a pathological liar!

She's very bitter. And that's all I have for Ravonna!

Onto… Aiko!

"Aiko’s character is by far one of my favourites to write and analyse; it is the most developed one I have had over the years, and it will continue onwards. The main thing to point out is that he is very neglectful of both his and others’ emotions, which causes a lot of his relationships to be inversed and usually don’t end too long [friendship, familial alike]. It wasn’t his fault; he was raised by people who disregarded his thoughts and feelings—a world that exploited him for his innocence. But does it justify all means? He had his own choice, his own morals, and most importantly, he’s afraid of being abandoned, yet he digs his own grave from his poor decisions. He thinks it’s normal for it to happen.

Feeling the pain of being abandoned feels so natural to him that it’s concerning. He’s afraid to comfort the people around him because he was once always pushed aside and bordered by the fact that “you’re not human, you won’t understand.” and that it would be unnatural for him to sympathise. All his attempts at trying to help other people just leave him being left alone, with nothing but words that slit through the heart. That someone leaving him is his fault or that he wasn’t enough for them to stay. He mostly blames him more than the other person. His “I don’t give a fuck” attitude is technically just his line of defence that if he shows people that he does not care, they won’t bother to even build a bond with him, which saves him the time to never feel another heartache.

Yet he adores people’s approval and adoration, which is why, despite his controversy within the acting industry, he pursued his career as an actor. I could say that the cast helped him develop as a person a lot. That despite everything, there are still people who will be there for you, with no strings attached. He felt a sense of freedom and closure that he had never felt before.

His relationship with Ravonna, however, was one of the most impactful for him [telling his both present and future wise], and he sees her as his younger sister. This is ironic because Ravonna acts more mature than him; it bothers him and sometimes flusters him when he fucks things up. So Ravonna leaving the cast was the abandonment that impacted him differently than the ones he had experienced. It made him angry to the bit; he questioned who was to blame. He was paranoid for some period, till he once again disregarded his emotions, his feelings putting on the burden that he had his fault for her leaving. That’s why he was so devastated that Ravonna didn’t look like she cared or thought of the effect of her actions; in his eyes, she wasn’t any different than the others. Everything goes all over again. Everyone is just the same."

[proxylynn]

https://www.tumblr.com/proxylynn/744293560207179776/lynsie-just-trying-to-do-her-job-managing

Aww Mammon is worrying for Lynsie!

Do these two have a history together?

[Yeah. Going way back to that massive "In the Beginning" lore post that I dropped when I made her...Lynsie aka the Primordial Dragon was the creature made and subsequently cast aside by the Creator who tossed her into the pit that would be Hell. Do a little time skippy and we got Lucifer being cast down for the whole Fuirt thing. Lu Lu finds her and offers that which was denied...compassion. Another time skip later, the battle of Heaven and Hell's reformation blah blah, and Lucifer sets up his new world and the order of power.

"When the war was over, many were now cast down into the pit of the dammed, the beasts included. With Lucifer now in power over the fallen, mostly because he still possessed very strong angelic power which holds sway over the now demonic power of his contemporaries, he used the dragon to sway the beasts to help in reforming their eternal prison into a world of their own. For their aid, the beasts were granted new roles and lordships as the hierarchy of Hell was being established. It's a crude form of hierarchy defined by power, with Lucifer being King of all Hell. Behemoth and Ziz sought nothing more than humble existences, choosing to take lord titles but no grand duties while remaining in eternal servitude. Leviathan, for its envious nature, took up what its siblings passed down, becoming not just a lord but a Prince as the Deadly Sin of Envy, giving it rein over the abyssal sea of the Ring of Envy. The dragon for its part, took lordship and sought a governing seat at Lucifer's side, which was granted in the form of the dragon being used to keep all of Hell in line when the chaotic stability of power is being threatened."

During this early halcyon age, Lucifer was still believing in his dreams and formed the Deadly Sin Circus (making that name up for this). All seven had a role that best fit their talents. Lucifer was the Ring Leader. (Ha! Puns!) Beelzebub was the Beast Tamer. Asmodeus was the Fire Spinner. Mammon was the Clown and marketer. (now come my headcanons) Satan was the Strongman and often would team up with Bee. Belphegor was in charge of concessions and provided very addictive snacks. Leviathan was in charge of effects and would put on aquatic musical performances. On occasion, the beasts were requested to perform. (Satan loved showing off with Behemoth. Ziz not so much and would stay out of it.) Lynsie would try dabbling with Ozzie and Bee (for obvious reasons) but found chemistry with Mammon, usually with her being the "straight man" in their double comedy while he was the "funny man".

As Hell grew, their responsibilities did too and after some tensions boiled over, the curtains on the circus closed with everyone parting ways. Though some still remain close, Ozzy and Bee are still buds, and Bee generally gets along with everyone...except Mammon.

Mammon's bluntness and lack of shits-given attitude tends to make him incredibly off-putting and it strains even Lynsie's patience at times due to her governing over Hell's power structures. If it weren't for their friendship and Lucifer's lack of ruling, Mammon would likely lose a lot of his power, possibly even the rule of his Ring. But so long as she's in the seat of control and he's able to keep on her good side, he'll continue to rule Greed while she's stuck dealing with the aftermath of whatever new trouble he's caused.

It's a messed up dependent relationship because both are aware of this cycle yet can't break it. She doesn't want to lose him as a friend because she doesn't want to do what was done to her, she doesn't want to feel like she betrayed him for that is the ultimate sin in her eyes, yet the longer she tries to tackle this on her own the more stress consumes her. And he knows she's probably the only decent soul who doesn't judge or want something from him, purely enjoying him for who he is, but his selfish destructive tendencies are a wedge that threatens to pry their bond apart and it secretly terrifies him.]

[koreposion]

Alright time to post writing that is cringe and mostly for me to read again later

The cage rattled loudly as Horror slammed against the bars from the inside. An animalistic growl leaving him as he observed his captors. He backed away from the bars so he didn't have to stare into the eyelights of Ink.

"I wish you could rip me apart too." Ink cooed in a way that was sickly sweet and oh so true. Dream watched him to make sure he didn't let Horror out just for the fun of it.

"Please keep your heartfelt messages to yourself." Swap groaned as he worked on making sure the cage stayed shut. If there was one thing he didn't want it was Horror getting out.

"Hm? Why would I?" Ink asked as he leaned up against the cage, in reach of Horror's claws, "It makes him so angry, it's beautiful."

"We actually just need him to stay calm and wait until the others get here." Swap explained as his eyes glanced over at Horror who seemed to be contemplating something, "He's bait basically."

Dream flinched at the harsh word to describe their prisioner but to be far "prisioner" wasn't as kind either. A sigh left him as he spoke, "All I want to do, is talk with Cross and my brother. I don't get why he had to take....Horror."

There was an apologetic look in Dreams eyes as he looked into Horror's eyes. He was only met with a neutral stare.

"Lifeline. They'll be more willing to talk than fight, especially if Horror doesn't get himself out." Swap explains with a smile, trying to reassure Dream.

Ink's eyelights flicker into a number of shapes before he realizes that his pink is wearing off. A more reasonable trail of thought comes to him as he looks at his other teammates.

"If Horror doesn't get out himself, then they'll either send Cross or Nightmare to talk with us. I don't actually think they'd send more than one person." Ink explains as he sits in front of Horror's cage casually, "That would be pretty stupid given that Dust and Killer are more impulsive. The only reason the capture worked is because Horror was slamming the ink off of me."

"Yeah...that trick is pretty handy with impulsive brutes, huh? Who knew your blood could make an effective cage." Swap states with a chuckle, "Make them think they're winning and then get them right where you want them."

Ink looked up at Swap with indifference before taking two viles, Pink and Blue. He was going to be watching Horror for a while and wanted to feel all he could while he can.

"While you revel in your ego I'm going to be watching Horror." He stated as he blinked and his eyelights changed shape, a pink square and a blue x.

"Yeah yeah...Dream please keep an eye on him while I go relax. I know you two have your weird immortal workings but I need...a nap." Swap says with a tired drawl as he waves goodbye and leaves the room.

With worried eyes Dream let's Swap leave and then turns back to Ink. Who's whispering something to Horror and Horror is whispering something back...

They both turn to look at him for a second before Ink mentions something.

"You're just the cutest in the verses of course he likes you." Ink speaks softly.

"I do not get Gods and their obsession for me, maybe a creator just hates my guts." Horror hisses to Ink as he pressed against the bars.

"Or they love you lots, because let's be real-" Ink stares deeply into Horror's eyes, even the void of his empty eye socket, "You love ripping me apart just as much as I like being taken apart."

"... You're imagining things because of your weird fucked viles." Horror tells him with a frown, "You don't even actually feel something for me."

Ink laughs at that, an unnerving grin appears on his face, "I wish I could show you that I do."

Dream watched this whole display with interest, but in the way that this was new. Fundamentally, this was not healthy in any capacity. Even the emotions radiating off of Ink were bad, but in a way that made him feel good. It was sickening... He just wished someone would come to pick up Horror soon.

[memoryspine]

--- OF MEMORY,

hi hello i am also reintroducing yeona, now your resident living doll who resides on the very outskirts of town. she works mainly as an alchemist when it comes to practicing her magic, and is usually the last chance sort of nurse for humans and something pretty normal for supernaturals. she mostly specializes in healing, mending, fixing and replacing, whether it comes to your objects or you!

she was created and forgotten--- or so it seems. dug up from underneath the rubble of a mansion and given new life by the one that saved her, the sorceress that granted her the revitalization she needed taught her all that she knows

alchemy came mostly from books she read and discovered in the library of what she barely understood as home, as it seemed that whatever life there had came and gone. in some barely discernible letters, she has the barest ideas that her creator went seeking something in astra, and was too afraid to try and sneak her along the journey. it seems something happened to the house while she was in it, though her memory has been scrambled since the occurrence

the sorceress, too, was driven by the desire for what astra offered, and afflicted with something even incurable by her own magic and yeona's learned alchemy, ends up leaving her behind to seek it out

yeona stays. out of the place she lives she offers her services, which consists of reading the notes of her creator and her savior and piecing together the rest on her own, mending bones and granting what wishes she could with what she can create

she has noticeable hinges at her shoulders, elbows, wrists, knees, hips, and ankles, and a majority of her structure is made from some sort of soft, smooth, material, her spine crafted metal that moves along with her. her blood color is an unnatural silver, and there's always something about her eyes that reflect different in the light, like facets of stone. she's gotten more natural with her movements over the years, but to those who are human, of flesh and blood, there is something that is little.. off

she tries to hide it. there are so many mixed opinions about the state of her being and how she was created among humans and supernaturals alike, and so she does not often show it or mention it. while her healing methods are universally quite successful, the oddness of her presence is enough to keep a good amount of people away, and she tends to keep to herself to lean into it (even though she is so curious about the world and humans and how they work..)

[eddiexmunsn]

Is it bad I havent shared anything here on Tumblr because I have <15 followers and half are mutuals who have already shared stuff. Tumblr is supposed to be my "escape" from the real world. On my irl social media I've shared stuff, I have more reach there and I knowni have some followers who are of differing opinions. I feel kind of guilty not sharing things though

reblogs are always nice because they can push it more on people’s “for you” tab if they follow your mutuals or like related things that you do, but also i feel like it’s a bit harder because of the tumblr algorithm. it’s not tiktok, where likes and comments have huge impact on how many people see the content. tumblr is more about having a corner and mostly sticking in it until you find new content to include in that space. it can also kinda be an echo chamber on here, so i’d always double check any stuff i’m reblogging on here that doesn’t already have reliable sources given in the post.

i definitely recommend following Palestinian creators and other journalists on instagram/twitter to share and push out their videos and messages, no matter how many followers you have. ANY eyes on this is good, even if it’s just a couple. and it’ll be uncomfortable to see these things and to put it on display for others, but i personally think Palestine lives are more important than my feelings right now. does that mean im not taking care of myself mentally and physically? i absolutely am doing my best to keep myself mentally sane while my government doesn’t listen to us. but imo its more urgent to help than to put my comfort first.

all that being said, it never hurts to reblog stuff on here if your mutuals are! i know we all want to have our safe spaces, but the Palestinians don’t get that. and i am personally choosing to put their lives first and my discomfort second.

i don’t want this to come off white savior-y or self righteous, im trying to hold myself accountable. we cannot makes this about us, this is about them. about the men and boys being executed, and the women and children who are sniped and buried under rubble.

i’d rather be distressed and trying to help, than to soothe myself and turn away from the truth just to be comfortable. especially because im an american jew, and this genocide is being committed in the name of MY culture & religion and is being funded with MY tax dollars. i dont think its right for me to stand by like im innocent, because im not.

here’s a list of some instagram accounts that are reliable and showing the truth:

motaz.azaiza

wizard_bisan1

by_plestia

hindkhoudary

pslnational

jewishvoiceforpeace

officialjakegyllenhala

eye.on.palestine (very graphic footage/images)

aljazeeraenglish (or just aljazeera)

sbeih.jpg

celebrities4palestine posts updates on celebrity action against the genocide

[c-is-for-circinate]

For a long, large part of my life, being queer in a media landscape--finding queerness in a media landscape--has meant theft.

I'm a Fandom Old, somehow, these days, older than most and younger than some, in that way that's grown associated with grumpy crotchetyness and shotguns on porches and back in my day, we had to wade through our Yahoo Groups mailing lists uphill both ways, boring and irrelevant anecdotes from Back In Those Days when homophobia clearly worked differently than it does now, probably because we weren't trying hard enough. I've seen a lot of stories through the years. I've read a lot of fanfic. (More days than not, for the past twenty years. I've read a lot of fanfic.)

When people my age start groaning and sighing at conversations about representation and queerbaiting, when we roll our eyes and drag all the old war stories out again in the face of AO3 is terrible and Not Good Enough, so often what we say is: you Young Folks Today have no idea how hard, how scary, how limiting it was to be queer anywhere Back In Those Days. Including online, maybe especially online, including in a media landscape that hated us so much more than any one you've ever known. And that is true. Always and everywhere, again and again, it's true, we remember, it's true.

We don't talk so much about the joy of it.

Online fan spaces were my very first queer communities, ever. I was thirteen, I was fourteen, I was fifteen--I was a lonely, over-precocious "gifted kid" two years too young for my grade level in an all-girls' Catholic school in the suburbs--I lived in a world where gay people were a rumor and an insult and a news story about murder. I was straight, of course, obviously, because real people were straight and anyway I was weird enough already--I couldn't be two things strange, couldn't be gay too, but--well, I could read the stories. I could feel things about that. I would have those stories to help me, a few years later, when I knew I couldn't call myself straight any more.

And those stories were theft. There was never any doubt about that. We wrote disclaimers at the top of every fic, with the specter of Anne Rice's lawyers around every corner. We hid in back-corners of the internet, places you could only find through a link from a link from a link on somebody else's recs page, being grateful for the tiny single-fandom archives when you found them, grateful for the webrings where they existed. It was theft, all of it, the stories about characters we did not own, the videotaped episodes on your best friend's VHS player, one single episode pulled off of Limewire over the course of three days.

It was theft, we knew, to even try and find ourselves in these stories to begin with. How many fics did I read in those days about two men who'd always been straight, except for each other, in this one case, when love was stronger than sexual orientation? We stole our characters away from the heterosexual lives they were destined to have. We stole them away from writers and producers and TV networks who work overtime to shower them in Babes of the Week, to pretend that queerness was never even an option. This wasn't given to us. This wasn't meant for us. This wasn't ours to have, ever, ever in the first place. But we took it anyway.

And oh, my friends, it was glorious.

We took it. We stole. And again and again, for years and years and years, we turned that theft into an art. We looked for every opening, every crack in every sidewalk where a little sprout of queerness might grow, and we claimed it for our own and we grew whole gardens. We grew so sly and so skilled with it, learning to spot the hints of oh, this could be slashy in every new show and movie to come our way. Do you see how they left these character dynamics here, unattended on the table? How ripe they are for the pocketing. Here, I'll help you carry them. We'll make off with these so-called straight boys, and we only have to look back if somebody sets out another scene we want for our own.

We were thieves, all of us, and that was fine and that was fair, because to exist as queer in the world was theft to begin with. Stolen time, stolen moments--grand larceny of the institution of marriage, breaking and entering to rob my mother's hopes for grandchildren. Every shoplifted glance at the wrong person in the locker room (and it didn't matter if we never peeked, never dared, they called us out on it anyway). Every character in every fic whose queerness became a crime against this ex-wife, that new love interest. Every time we dared steal ourselves away from the good straight partners we didn't want to date.

And: we built ourselves a den, we thieves, wallpapered in stolen images and filled to the brim with all the words we'd written ourselves. We built ourselves a home, and we filled it with joy. Every vid and art and fic, every ship, every squee. Over and over, every straight boy protagonist who abandoned all womankind for just this one exception with his straight boy protagonist partner found gay orgasms and true love at the end.

Over and over, we said: this isn't ours, this isn't meant to be ours, you did not give this to us--but we are taking it anyway. We will burglarize you for building blocks and build ourselves a palace. These stories and this place in the world is not for us, but we exist, and you can't stop us. It's ours now, full of color and noise, a thousand peoples' ideas mosaic'ed together in celebration. We made this, and it will never be just yours again. You won't ever truly get it back, no matter how many lawyers you send, not completely. We keep what we steal.

.

Things shifted over time, of course. That's good. That's to be celebrated. Nobody should have to steal to survive. It should not be a crime, should not feel like a crime, to find yourself and your space in the world.

There were always content creators who could slip a little wink in when they laid out their wares, oh what's this over here, silly me leaving this unattended where anybody could grab it, of course there might be more over by the side door if you come around the alleyway (but if anybody asks, you didn't get this from ME). We all watched Xena marry Gabrielle, in body language and between the lines. We sat around and traded theories and rumors about whether the people writing Due South knew what they were doing when they sent their buddy cops off into the frozen north alone together at the end of the show, if they'd done it on purpose, if they knew. But over the years, slowly, thankfully, the winks became less sly.

A teenage boy put his hand on another teenage boy's hand and said, you move me, and they kissed on network TV, in a prime-time show, on FOX, and the world didn't burn down. Here and there, where they wanted to, where they could without getting caught by their bosses and managers, content creators stopped subtly nudging people around the back door and started saying, "Here. This is on offer here too, on purpose. You get to have this, too."

And of course, of course that came with a whole host of problems too. Slide around to the back door but you didn't get this from me turned into it's an item on our special menu, totally legit, you've just got to ask because the boss throws a fit if we put it out front. Shopkeepers and content creators started advertising on the sly, come buy your fix here!, hiding the fine print that says you still have to take what you've purchased home and rebuild it with your semi-legal IKEA hacks. Maybe they'll consider listing that Destiel or Sterek as a full-service menu item next year. Is that Crowley/Aziraphale the real thing or is it lite?

And those problems are real and the conversations are worth having, and it's absolutely fair to be frustrated that you can't find the ship you want on sale in anything like your color and size in a vast media landscape packed full of discount hetships and fast-fashion m/f. It's fair to be angry. It's fair to be frustrated. Queerbait is a word that exists for a reason.

There's a part of me that hurts, though, every time the topic comes up. It's a confusing, bad-mannered part of me, but it's still very real. And it's not because I'm fawning for crumbs, trying to be the Good, Non-Threatening Gay. It's not that I'm scared and traumatized by the thought of what might happen if we dare raise our voices and ask for attention. (Well. Not mostly. I'll always remember being quiet and scared and fifteen, but it's been a long two decades since then. I know how to ask for a hell of a lot more now.)

It's because I remember that cozy, plush-wallpapered den of joyful thieves. I remember you keep what you steal.

Every single time--every time--when a story I love sets a couple of characters out on a low, unguarded table, perfectly placed to be pilfered on the sly and taken home and smushed together like a couple of dolls, my very first thought is always, always joy. Always, that instinct says, yay! Says, this is ours now. As soon as I go home and crawl into that pillow-fort den, my instincts say, I will surely find people already at work combing through spoils and finding new ways to combine them, new ways to make them our own. I know there's fic for that. I've already seen fic for that, and I wasn't really interested last time, but the new store display's got my brain churning, and I can't wait to see what the crew back at the hideout does with this.

Every time, that's where my brain goes. And oh, when I realize the display's put out on purpose, that somebody snuck in a legitimate special menu item, when the proprietor gives me the nod and wink and says, you don't have to come around the side, I know it's not much but here--there is so much joy and relief and hope in me from that! Oh, what we can make with these beautiful building blocks. Oh what a story we can craft from the pieces. Oh, the things we can cobble together. Look at that, this one's a little skimpy on parts but we can supplement it, this one's got a whole outline we can fill in however we want. This one technically comes semi-preassembled, and that's boring as shit and a pain to take back apart, but that's fine, we'll manage. We're artists and thieves. I bet someone's pulling out the AU saw to cut it to pieces already.

And then I get back to our den, which has moved addresses a dozen times over the years and mostly hangs out on Tumblr now (and the roof leaks and the landlord's sketchy as fuck but at least they don't charge rent, and we've made worse places our own). And I show up, ready for joy--ready for a dozen other people who saw that low-hanging fruit on that unguarded table, who got the nod and wink about the special menu item, who're ready to get so excited about this newest haul. Did you see what we picked up? The theft was so easy, practically begging to be stolen. The last owner was an idiot with no idea what to do with it. The last owner knew exactly what it could become, bless their heart, under a craftsman with more time on their hands, so they looked away on purpose at just the right time to let me take it home. I show up every time ready for our space, the place that fed me on joy and self-confidence when I was fifteen and starving. The place that taught me, yes, we are thieves, because it is RIGHT to take what we need, and the beautiful things we create are their own justification. We are thieves, and that's wonderful, because nothing is handed to us and that means we get to build our own palaces. We get to keep everything we steal.

I go home, and even knowing the world is different, my instincts and heart are waiting for that. And I walk in the door, and I look at my dash, and I glance over at twitter, and--

And people are angry, again. Angry at the slim pickings from the hidden special menu. So, so tired and angry, at once again having to steal.

And they're right to be! Sometimes (often, maybe) I think they're angry at the wrong people--more angry with the shopkeeper who offers the bite-sized sampler platter of side characters or sneaks their queer content in on the special menu than the ones who don't include it at all. But it's not wrong to be mad that Disney's once again advertising their First Gay Character only to find out it's a tiny sprinkle of a one-line extra on an otherwise straight sundae. It's not wrong to be furious at the world because you've spent your whole life needing to be a thief to survive. It's far from wrong. I'm angry about it too.

But this was my den of thieves, my chop shop, my makerspace. Growing up in fandom, I learned to pick the locks on stories and crack the safes of subtext at the very same time I learned to create. They were the same thing, the same art. We are thieves, my heart says, we are thieves, and that's what makes us better than the people we steal from. We deconstruct every time we create. We build better things out of the pieces.

And people are angry that the pre-fab materials are too hard to find, the pickings too slim, the items on sale too limited? Yes, of course they are, of course they should be--but my heart. Oh, my heart. Every single time, just a little bit, it breaks.

Of course the stories are terrible (they have always been terrible). Of course they are, but we are thieves. We steal the best parts and cobble them back together and what we make is better than it was before. The craftsman's eye that cases a story for weak points, for blank spaces, for anywhere we can fit a crowbar and pry apart this casing--that's skill and art and joy. Of course we shouldn't have to, of course we shouldn't have to, but I still love it. I still want it, crave it. I still thrill every time I see it, a story with hairline cracks that we can work open with clever hands to let the queer in.

That used to be cause for celebration, around here. I ask him to go back to the ruins of Aeor with me, two men together alone on an expedition in the frozen north, it feels like a gift. And I understand why some people take it as an insult. I understand not good enough. I understand how something can feel like a few drops of water to someone dying of thirst, like a slap in the face. If it was so easy to sneak it hidden onto the special menu, to place it on the unguarded side table for someone else to run off to, why not let it sit out front and center in the first place? I know it's frustrating. It should be. We should fight. We should always fight. I know why.

But my heart, oh, my heart. My heart only knows what it's been taught. My heart sees, this thing right here, the proprietor left it there for you with a nod and a wink because they Get It. It's not put together yet, but it's better that way anyway. It's so full of pieces to pull apart and reassemble. I bet they've got a whole mosaic wall going up at home already. We can bring it home and make it OURS, more than it was ever theirs, forget half of what it came from and grow a new garden in what remains.

And I go home to find anger, and my heart breaks instead.

[zivazivc]

Pinocchio AU

Okay people want the explanation for this comic so here it goes. It’s long and complicated and MESSED UP because of course it is, this is me. I’m going to write in points because my small tired brain can’t handle good english atm but basically to sum up the Adrien was a sentimonster theory or Pinocchio AU as I like to call it:

Young married Emilie and Gabriel can’t have kids. Gabriel reluctantly accepts this fate and even brings up adoption as a possibility once, but Emilie doesn’t want to hear any of that. She’s a bit of a Marinette in the sense that she pictures this romanticized ideal life for herself and a child—her flesh and blood—HAS to be in it.

They keep trying to get a baby while other young families Emilie knows keep growing. She feels left out and hurt and depressed, then her newlywed twin sister announces she’s expecting a baby too and something within Emilie just unhinges.

She eventually lies to some of her friends, who she was out for coffee with, that she’s pregnant too. She mostly does it just to see their reaction and feel what it would be like but it quickly spirals out of control where she just starts pretending she’s pregnant until you can’t even tell if she believes it herself.

Gabriel is confused at first because he hears the news second hand (a friend/family member congratulating him) so he’s apprehensive when he approaches his wife but she convinces him that they really are getting a baby and Gabriel is ecstatic.

It’s only later at a doctor’s check up that Gabriel learns that she indeed is not pregnant. The doctor even speaks to him alone explaining that his wife is in denial and that he should make sure she goes to see a psychiatrist, something she definitely wouldn’t do alone.

Gabriel is unsuccessful with that because he’s not entirely persistent, doesn’t want to be the guy with the crazy wife having to tell everyone she lied about being pregnant, and hopelessly believes she’ll just get over it eventually.

That is until her “pregnancy is near due”—her sister already had Félix in England a few months ago—and he stumbles on her transformed with her peacock miraculous (they already have both of them) creating a sentimonster newborn.

They have a huge fight about it but because Emilie refuses to destroy it, won’t tell Gabriel where the amok is, and Gabriel can’t just hurt the baby with his hands, Emilie just… wins. Fucked up, yeah?

Now she tried creating kids before this one, using her imagination to try and blend her and Gabriel’s looks but it just wasn’t working. So she decided to copy of photos of baby Félix because he already looked almost like a copy of his mother, and Amélie and Emilie already looked alike so it’s not so weird?—is what her mind was telling her.

She didn’t dare alter his looks but she decided to give the baby Gabriel’s eye color to include the “father” in some way. (Yes in that comic I made I gave Adrien a mix of green and gray but that was mainly to get the point across to the perceptive readers)

Now we got Adrien, a normal baby boy to the whole world except for Gabriel who’s forced into his wife’s fantasy through social expectations.

Why are we only at this point and this post is already so long AAAAAAAA!!!

Adrien physically basically grows in a way where Emilie just keeps changing his appearance to match what Félix looked like a few months prior.

Mentally he’s like a robot just taking in information without really needing to learn it. So Emilie decides when he says his first word, she decides when he learns to walk,… He knows how to walk, he just wasn’t given the command to do so yet.

But even so he does develop a personality over time, just slower, because unlike a normal child who’s always testing his boundaries, how far they’re allowed to go until they’re in real trouble, Adrien just can’t misbehave. At all.

But he does have his favorite foods and favorite toys, and jokes that make him laugh the most. The problem is just that Emilie could just decide that his favorite food is strawberries and he’d just start acting accordingly, rewiring his belief. 

He also isn’t allowed to argue or be mean to others which is why Félix thinks he’s a goody two-shoes weirdo while Chloé the brat adores him.

This behavior isn’t so hard to hide with a toddler who’s fickle but it’s harder and harder as the kid grows. Which is why the family becomes very secluded over time.

Gabriel always keeps distance with his “son”. He’s not Dad, he’s Father, he doesn’t do hugs and cuddles, he doesn’t say I love you. But Adrien knows he loves him because his mom told him so and he loves him back unconditionally because Mom said that’s what families do.

Now even though Gabriel is traumatized by this whole ordeal and knowing Adrien “isn’t real” freaks him out he does soften a bit over time. I’m going to give an awful example but like someone who hates cats softening for a cat that their partner/roommate decided to get/had from before. Continuing with this example: But still becoming appalled when the cat starts acting odd/unusually.

Okay I think you get the gist. Let’s move on…

Emilie loves her son more and more as he grows and his sentimonster behaviours start bothering her more and more too. She hates being reminded that he’s not a real boy by people mentioning he looks young for his age because Emilie forgot to make him grow for a while. She hates when he does everything like he’s told. She hates that he has no real friends because they’re afraid to expose him to the outside too much and without supervision. She hates to think about his future.

Her desire for him to be real keeps growing and is what drives her to search for a solution in the miraculous spellbook.

She cracks the script after years, when Adrien is nearly a teen, and finds a way to transfer the creators soul into a sentimonster.

It’s a long process that takes time and while she falls ill to everyone around her, Adrien becomes more real.

Gabriel starts realizing what’s happening when he notices Adrien hesitate for a second when he’s playing a video game and Gabriel wants him to do something, groan when he gets bothered watching TV, huff, complain, have slightly opposing opinions to his and Emilie’s, when he argues with his mother when she tells him she’s feeling fine; when he notices his son’s eyes are greener. Or is it all in his head?

He confronts his wife too late, when she’s extremely ill already, her normally vibrant eyes dulled match Adrien’s bluish gray, and he pieces together in his head what she’s doing.

Before Gabriel could properly think what to do to stop the love of his life from turning into a lifeless doll, in a fit of panic he tries to take her wedding band (where he knows Adrien’s amok is) to get rid of Adrien instead, but is unsuccessful in getting it off her so he snatches her peacock brooch instead (which she needs to complete the spell obvs) and breaks it. (Heyoo! broken peacock miraculous. things are coming together)

Because the spell was almost complete anyway it’s Emilie who falls unconscious. But she doesn’t disappear because she’s not a real sentimonster, she just becomes dormant like one.

This is the point in the story where Gabriel makes it seem like Emilie ran away or something like that—basically disappear. Now he’s living knowing he has an almost sentimonster wife in the basement, knowing he almost killed his son (or her), and having to care for a son that suddenly became much more alive, questioning, arguing, angry, screaming, not accepting, crying, grieving, staring at him with Emilie’s eyes.

Instead of becoming a real parent, Gabriel shuts him out.

Soon Adrien evolves desires for socializing, company, getting away from the suffocating home which eventually leads to him going to a public school.

He slowly starts to live life freely without the restrictions that were put around his thoughts.

Gabriel has an even stranger relationship with Adrien now because he still loves him in a way but also holds resentment toward him. But mostly he sees him as something valuable.

The show happens here…  And now finally we get to the comic…

Gabriel gets a hold of the ladybug and black cat miraculouses. (There’s no epic fight in his lair as you see there’s no Ladybug in the comic but that’s not really important)

What’s important is that Gabriel had deciphered the miraculous spellbook with the help of Emilie’s notes and had decided to use the unification’s “wish” power to awaken Emilie.

He’s aware he’ll need to sacrifice something for the wish to come true and he’s certain Adrien should be enough because the soul inside him is literally the one thing Emilie is missing.

✨Adrien (poor boy just lost his miraculous) is taken to Gabriel’s lair, where he finds out his father is Hawk Moth, sees his mother, learns he’s a sentimonster, and that he’s going to become a sacrifice ✨

Of course the last part is not what happens. It’s Gabriel who ends up being sacrificed.

I can’t decide if Gabriel ends up sacrificing himself because he changed his mind in the last moment while Adrien was screaming for him to stop, OR  because he didn’t love Adrien enough for him to be considered an equal exchange for his wife… O.O

But anyhow…

Emilie wakes up with Gabriel’s soul within her (hence the bluish gray eyes in the comic).

Adrien is traumatized for life.

This took me hours to write… I knew there was a reason why I didn’t want to do it. I hope I didn’t forget anything and my brain made sense of it all

Well there you have it, peeps. The Pinocchio AU. It’s as messed up as my sleep schedule. Good night.