#I tried to focus on completed works
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Dick Fic Rec List!
Dick-centric
look back in anger by vechter
Post-Spyral fic that just gets it (lets be real vechter just gets Dick). A lot of wonderful Fab Five moments, hints of Dickroy, and a fantastic look into the mind of Dick Grayson.
persephone’s in hell by Whiskey
De-aged Dick Grayson. Unstoppable force (Dick) meets immovable object (Jason). Background Dickroy, everyone is present. Set in post-crisis.
beat journalism by dustorange
After Bruce fires him, Dick becomes a reporter. Amazing Dick and Clark interactions.
Dick&Tim
a soft place to land by unchosenone
Post Infinite Crisis, post Blockbuster. Two grieving birds.
Dick&Damian
I’ll Wait With You by Sohotthateveryonedied
Damian steps on a landmine, Dick refuses to leave him alone.
The Rule Stands by Engineerd
Time travel brings a 10 year old Robin Dick Grayson to Gotham not long after Damian has been resurrected.
Dick&Bruce
Got Stepped On All Over by whaleofatime
One of my favorite Nightwing!Dick era Dick & Bruce fics. Bruce pov of Dick’s casual competence.
riding the blues by TheResurrectionist
One of the best outsider pov fics I’ve read. Dick flees the manor after another fight with Bruce, gets some life advice from a well meaning dad.
arms tonight by one_step_closer_to_death
Long-term effects of Chemo. Angsty hurt/comfort fic about a father’s love and the one battle he can’t fight.
License and Registration, Please by rogman
Rookie police officer Dick trolls Batman and the whole GCPD in one fell swoop (non-canon sort of crackfic but very funny) Who knew the Batmobile was actually just a Honda Civic?
Reborn Era
to be buried alive by FromStarstuff
What we could’ve had if the writers hadn’t forgotten all the women in Gotham during Reborn. Cass and Dick split Batman duties and learn some things about each other along the way.
the slumber party initiative by ScarlettSwordMoon
Mandatory quarantine in the bunker with Dick, Damian, and Stephanie. An attempt at light hearted slumber party games gets mean quick, turns into an opportunity for growth and acceptance.
Titans
big d stands for big (demon)or by danishsweethearts
4 out of 5 chapters. Tower’s haunted. Good thing Dick is an exorcist right? Absolutely hilarious, one of the best Titans fics out there.
Dickroy
It builds and builds and builds by vechter
Dick and Roy Outsiders era, the ones we love the most are the ones we know just how to hurt.
heavenly way to die by one_step_closer_to_death
Early Outsiders era. Roy gets seriously injured and flirts with Dick.
there’s a hole where your heart lies by FromStarstuff
Dickroy through the years, finally getting their act together.
#fic recs#dick grayson#dickroy#batman#there are a lot of great fics out there#i tried to put together a list of some of my favorites#there are not enough dick&tim fics they all focus on someone else or completely vilify the drakes so im sorry for only having one for them#highly recommend checking out the authors' other works or tumblrs
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I've been very unwell today and my queue is pretty short at the moment, so I might go quiet for a bit. Honestly I might end up in hospital again. I've been struggling for awhile and it's gotten worse, and I'm about past my limit of managing.
Take care of yourselves. xo
#personal#mental health#mental illness#anxiety#panic attacks#lowest I've been on the MH pain scale all day is 7 or 8#gallstone levels of distress at the moment#tempted to call the crisis line but I'm not sure they'll have resources to do anything#it's not like my panic is irrational or catastrophising#it is very possibly the end of the world#pretty sure anxiety and wanting to die is an appropriate emotional response#I'm being stupid and histrionic I guess but I'm not ok#nothing happening is about me but i still can't bear it#i can't focus or think about anything except dread#I've tried meditation and 3 3s and tensing all my muscles and then letting go#I've tried distracting myself with games and tv#nothing is working#heart palpitations high bp tinnitus hyperventilating nausea tightness in chest crying all day on and off#i can't feel like this for the rest of my life#i can't feel like this for another two weeks or another two days#and i don't see why i should have to#might have to go completely offline on a permanent basis but then I'm without my social contacts or my job so#take care of yourselves and each other#maybe i can get sedated or something
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As you can see I didn't end up taking many screenshots (which I'm honestly oddly happy about?). I had a weird luck with adventures so there was a lot of running back and forth and not that much tomb exploring (the fact we didn't even go to chateau du landgraab...) but during those short few days in Champs Les Sims Finley maxed out his visa level and became an honorary citizen so we won't be coming back here any time soon :)
#ts3#ts3 gameplay#ts3 scenery#strange lepacy#strange 2#there's this goal to complete all tombs in the challenge but I'm not interested in that#like it's way too much work for me#I tried once and felt miserable trying to squeeze it all in so with Finley I just wont try again and focus on other goals instead
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i am crying at the first episode of a sign of affection… i am thankful for the positive and hopeful representation omg ;; the protag is deaf and wears hearing aids and i love that some scenes actually drop the sound so you can understand what she's experiencing ;;~~~;;
#my text#i tried to read a silent voice once but i did not finish it bc the portrayal of bullying felt too real and too cruel :'(#im so happy for a story that isn't about the character being bullied (although that kind of story also has an important place)#although after watching more episodes; the main guy is initiating physical contact waaaay too fast imo#but im giving it the benefit of the doubt bc its fantasy and i trust them to have it work out oTL#edit: finished it. completely won me over. amazing#what an incredibly sweet show that was ultimately about communication. fantastic and uplifting portrayal of hearing disability#i only wish there were slightly more dropping of the sound to show what she's actually experiencing bc i really liked those parts#but i also understand why they wouldn't want to focus on that or would want to use sound for effect and it's a valid choice
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Having a job where i have to interact with coworkers all day has really made me notice how bad my social skills are
#like i like focus HARD on the work and i find it really hard to talk at the same time#which is interesting because i know my family/friends probably think i talk TOO much but its totally different depending on who im around#like if im with friends or people i feel really confortable with i can infodump for half an hour on shit they dont care about#but with my coworkers who are all adult men mostly 10+ years older than me and im laying i completely forget to talk#so with me its either non stop bullshit or just that fluoride stare#i know some coworkers are ok with it but i have at least one who clearly isnt a fan of long silences and tries to make conversation and#i realise i CANNOT hold a conversation with him so i probably come off as super boring#and even went prompted (asked a question) i usually just say Okey like ness and then go silent again#i dont mind that much but then sometimes i think back and im like wow. He was trying to talk to me and i probably came off as really boring#or shy or a stuck up bitch. which i dont think im any of#anyway im the 😐🧍autistic for real
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it would be really cool to have another chronicles-esque series
#bwark#obviously i want the staffing issues and working conditions at olm to be better first#or just get another studio to do it#i think things might have improved? given that horizons has ran pretty smoothly so far? i hope so at least#not even taking the point of this post into consideration for that i just want the conditions at olm to be good#but back to chronicles. im not the type of guy who demands that ash be brought back#and reaches excessively to try and find hints that he will return#some ash fans can be really annoying about this esp the ones who criticize everything horizons does without even having seen it#like im completely fine with having a new cast and i don't need to bring him up every 5 minutes when discussing horizons#but with that being said i do miss the kid. baby's first blorbo#and i think a chronicles-esque series would be a good way to bring him back without tying him down#like they're not restricted to a series-long story and can just focus it on an episode by episode basis#and ik that's kinda what they tried to do with atbapm but that series was also about ending ash's time as the protagonist#meanwhile this wouldn't have any restrictions at all#hell even focusing on ash's old friends the same way the original chronicles did would still be cool even if ash isn't involved#idk im just spitballing here#the staff have said they're not opposed to bringing him back if a good reason calls for it#also i don't want it to be au ash. nothing against him but the au verse means nothing to me
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sigh........... i keep posting i cant stop sorry. but anyway i just remembered drama class.......... urrgh. im so harsh when i give constructive criticism/feedback i hate it bc no one wanrs to talk to me "sorry i just got thrown off bc cam is so critical" dont blame me because you dont know how to stay in character 😕 i just told you it doesnt make sense to wave your hand at the side of her head where she cant see it
#txt#so many more moments#im sorry 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i just wanted us to actually do our work#i made a girl cry once because i told her that we needed to focus on our lines and not blocking at the time#im sorry im the only one here willing to put us on track 😭#'amelies a perfectionist about blocking cams just a perfectionist lol' NOT EVEN i just want us to do our work 😭#the girl i accidentally made cry hadnt learned ANY of her lines and tried to put me down over sometimes messing up some of mune#EVEN THOHGH I HAD THE MOST LINES IN THE WHOLE THING.... wed had months to learn our lines and she was STILL USING THE VERY FIRST DRAFT OF O#R SCRIPT............... the script everyone else was ysing was completely different#urgh. i feel like im the only normal person on earth sometimes#but anyway
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Hoping we at least see yuzuki in ryōshū's resonance with the golden borough (at least in like. A cg for a flashback)
yeah, I don't think it's possible for her canto to not include yuzuki, seeing as she's one of the pivotal characters of hell screen. but it's probably going to be through bough resonance flashbacks. however if we have to play through the end of hell screen and watch yuzuki die i am going to start chewing drywall screaming crying acting unreasonable
#like i said i'm guessing ryoshu is at the point where hell screen is over#and her low point where limbus company recruited her was after she tried to kill herself b/c she lost her daughter#and the hell screen was complete so she had nothing left to live for#and with her connection to the fingers and how the ring was a focus of leviathan and how she's an artist#i think ryoshu used to work for the ring. or was at least commissioned by them#scary implications for what the hell screen is going to look like in limbus then!
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hi curio! do you have plans to publish your novels once you finish them? i love your writing so i would look forward to reading your original work too! (sorry if you've been asked this before)
hi there! aw thank you so much 🥰 I'm always surprise-delighted when ppl are interested in my original works!
unfortunately, my answer is ????? I would like to, mostly because I want a physical version of these fuckers that I can hold in my hands but, unlike when I first wrote TCP in elementary school and thought I was going to be a bestselling, globally adored author by 12 yr old, I uh. am not that confident about navigating publishing 😅 Part of me just wants to throw them up on a website and be done with it, because I a) am not terribly concerned about the financial aspect of publishing and b) mostly just REALLY want other ppl to talk abt these characters with me haha
So ultimately, yes, I want to publish them in some form but I am extremely unclear on what form that will be (in no small part because all my original fics are in various stages of "mostly words rather than a whole story") 😅
(and you never have to apologize about asking something! i'm literally always down to talk about my stories + have the memory of a concussed goldfish half the time anyway lol)
#me as an elementary kid having written like 18 pages of absolute nonsense: I AM THE GOD-KING OF WRITING#me at 26 now actually moderately okay at writing: perhaps i will just print it out myself and learn how to hand bind it....#i do know there are resources out there to help navigate#but it's one of those things that feels v v overwhelming AND i'm not actually in a position to action it#(i. hate when Consultant Talk comes out in non-work arenas but. anyway.)#so i have just mentally shelved it and tried to focus on like. actually getting a complete draft of something ready to edit#which i have now! and i've started by slow ass readthru of tcp for editing purposes#it's sort of terrible#i have actually read these words too many times#asked & answered#anonymice
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ive become so bad at sketching and composition that im considering busting out blender and just make it there and paint over it 😦
#this is not a problem obviously this is okay to do#however im afraid that by using this i will never improve at sketching#genuinely ending it all because im so bad at gesture drawing. my fucking art skills are in reverse#really good at detail work but REALLY fuckig bad at the basics#just kill me at this point.lol#im starting to genuinely hate my art and it's been years YEEARS that i've never felt like this#i learned to love my art and be genuinely happy with it and now i feel like im backsliding. and brother#art is one of those few things thst keep me afloat. to be completely real#im not in full hatred mode but i feel it coming... if i dont get it together soon... then.... ?#i've tried just painting from uh#painting from.... от пятна короче#and its. kinda working and kinda doesnt#all the proportions feel warped and it's pissing me off. genuinely#it feels like it's all slipping from me#worthless 😂unskilled.#i do also think it's becasue of tunnel vision. it's been bad#it's been really bad#i just focus on 1 specific thing and can't let it go#and then the whole picture feels warped around that thing
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Shaking an ambiguous figure by the shoulders aggressively "LISTEN TO DISABLED PEOPLE WHEN THEY VOICE THEIR LIMITATIONS" "But I think you can-" "Why don't you just-" "It's worth a try-" NO. IT ISN'T ABOUT YOU AND WHAT YOU THINK.
#Context is that I've been just kinda routinely gaslit and dismissed when voicing my concerns or need to focus on my health#throughout my life by multiple people.#When they demoted my previous boss and this new jackhole took over who would try to convince me to come in to work when I tried to call off#not even PTO.#And tried to tell me to reschedule my surgery to a more convenient date for HIM#basically making short-staffing the EMPLOYEES problem rather than management's problem#I have been pushing and PUSHING myself more than I knowingly should and today I went in to my doctor#thinking I could start disability on the 21st or something.#NOPE no more working for 2mo effective immediately.#That's how bad this has gotten.#Like I am on the verge of being completely immobile because even with my new cane I'm having wrist problems too which would mean I can't#even independently use a wheelchair if this was allowed to get worse.#disability#disabled#venting into the abyss
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i am incapable of focusing on more than one single thing at a time (specifically with Creative Works). and that is how all my wips die 😔😭
#brain says. one thing at a time#and sure i definitely. uh. definitely focus on them an INCREDIBLE AMOUNT. but. *looks at my wips* i want. i want to finish something#anything. please.#let me finish longer projects like multichapter fics or comics. i am Begging. brain please. brain#i am so sorry for all my gaster enjoyer followers who showed up because my askblog#words cannot express how BADLY i want to FINISH that. but. oughhghh#brain says Train Men Only#(and right now. it has been completely taken over by the specific thing im currently working on#i have Tried to draw Other Stuff and absolutely nothing has happened. it's so bad)
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Went to the optician and paid £35 to be told there is nothing wrong with my eyesight
#there is however something wrong with my EYES#in their relaxed position my eyeballs like to point outwards rather than straight ahead#so if i; say; decide to look at a screen or read a book or generally focus on anything close to my face#my eyes have to work WAY harder to converge and focus on that thing than other people’s would#this is especially a problem when i’m tired and this is why i get double vision#SO the prescription is straight up just for prism lenses. that’s it#it’s kind of nice to know that i’m not completely losing my mind. i couldn’t work out why reading glasses don’t help me#the optician was like ‘yeah no shit. you have 6/4 vision in both eyes’#most of the lenses he tried on me were the same or worse than my actual eyes#once again i continue to bamboozle medical professionals by having fucking weird problems#personal
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it's so fucking annoying that the public opinion on SSRI seems to be that they make you into an emotionless zombie and the side effects are clearly not worth taking them, the implication being that nobody was in a bad enough state before taking them that they may consider the side effects worth it. like idk man i just don't care that much when you compare it to uncontrollable mood swings and constant intrusive suicidal thoughts. like ppl act as if this is some kind of anti-pharma progressive line of thought but they don't actually give a shit about informed consent before beginning the medication in any meaningful sense, they mostly just seem to think depression isn't real and nobody would continue taking antidepressants if they knew there would be drawbacks. i assure you my consent is very informed i just don't like being completely out of control and scared of myself, which is what i was fucking like off medication. maybe someday if i have a few months of my life free to have outbursts at people and desperately want to kill myself ill try a new medication or weaning off this one or whatever. if you want it that bad you can prepare the cash and some apology letters.
#it's one thing when you hear this once or twice and another when it's all anyone fucking talks about#often completely unprompted in response to simply mentioning that you take this medication#and people really overestimate how much doctors that don't specialize in psychiatry or neurology know about this too#like ive had a doctor casually suggest i cold turkey quit the SSRI ive been on for five years#sometimes people just don't know what they're fuckin talking about#it's just so frustrating to me because i WAS incredibly nervous about starting meds and did my research#i wish my doctor had made the research part easier but i don't regret starting them at all#frankly i think i should've been put on them younger but i was 13 when i started so i doubt it would've been possible#like maybe someday ill be in a place where i can quit but#when ppl say this shit it's so fucking annoying cos it's a medication that doesn't do anything particularly awful and is extremely difficult#to stop taking. and which for me at least is probably also you know Fucking Working#anyway just. i can at least underneath where its coming from from ppl who have tried SSRIs and had a bad experience#but this very much comes from Everybody and it gets exhausting#i will also likely be taking birth control and diabetes medication for the next 30 to 40 years why don't you focus on those
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AITA for telling my boyfriend’s coworkers that he’s lying about his body count?
I (35f) have been dating my boyfriend (32m) for four years. It’s honestly been the best relationship until last Friday when it all went down. I feel like I’m in the right, but now I’m wondering if I overstepped.
For context, my boyfriend has been a professional Slasher for about eight months now. He’s always really admired Cryptids, Monsters, and Nightmares so when his application was finally accepted, he was over the moon even if he was starting in a lower position than he initially applied for.
At his company, being a Slasher requires a lot of travel which we knew when he accepted the position. The end goal is for him to get a promotion to at least regional Nightmare (he wants Cryptid, but that position doesn’t have a lot of turnover) but to get that he needs to be in role for at least 12 months OR meet his goals for three months in a row. Once he promotes, we plan to relocate to his new region and “start talking about our future.”
(Side note: no this isn’t about him not popping the question yet. We are both in agreement that marriage comes after financial stability. I run a small business doing scare consults and, while it’s been growing, I wouldn’t call it stable yet. So neither of us are ready.)
I told him it’s completely normal for it to take a whole year before he’s ready to promote and he really should focus on adjusting to the company before thinking about next steps. I used to work for a competitor (I’ve been retired for five years now) and I know it can be hard to go from only taking the occasional human life to having to take over half a dozen a week. It’s not a light workload, no matter how easy it looks in the movies. One of my best friends Slashes part-time and she still only averages about five lives a week despite having done it for years. Especially these days, it can be really hard to meet quota. Humans are getting smarter, no matter what the Council wants us to think.
Anyway, boyfriend didn’t do as well as he thought he would in his first couple months. Totally understandable, of course, which I told him. I suggested he ask his boss if he could be put on a couple team assignments or even a duo until he got the hang of it. That was our first real fight. He thought I was doubting his ability to kill. He brought up how I told him it would take over a year to promote and how I said that this job wasn’t for everyone (His first assignment ended with a 0% kill rate, but that’s a different story). He said it felt like I didn’t believe in him and he said that if that was the case then maybe we shouldn’t be thinking about marriage so soon.
It got pretty messy after that. I felt like he was forgetting that I’d worked in the same field and, arguably, had a lot more experience (not to brag, but I averaged a 98% kill rate). Also, four years is NOT too soon to talk about marriage. He said I didn’t understand how he needed to focus on his career right now. I told him I thought he was taking Slasher too lightly just because it wasn’t Cryptid. He accused me of not respecting him and then things spiraled from there.
We both said a lot of things we didn’t mean and I’m embarrassed that it turned into a bit of a fang measuring contest. I ended up sleeping under the bed for a few nights until he coaxed me out to apologize.
It was a rough patch, but we talked it out. We agreed that, going forward, I wouldn’t offer advice unless he asked and he would try not to take so much of his frustration home with him. He took a weekend off and we went on a recreational haunting trip in the Montana woods.
Things did get better after that. I tried not to give him consults every time he came back from a work trip. He started bringing me souvenirs like roses and cursed puzzle boxes his work said he could have. It became easier just to hang out with each other and it felt like we were back to normal.
But then, four months ago, he came home super pissed because his boss put him on a PIP. (A performance improvement plan.) Apparently, boyfriend had not been doing better at work, he had just stopped telling me when he had a bad assignment. I saw the paperwork he got (he left it in the dungeon under the house, I didn’t go through his stuff) and he’s been missing quota by a LOT. As a junior Slasher, he was supposed to be executing at least 6 people a week, but he’d been lucky to be maiming half that.
Obviously, I had to talk to him about that. We rent our house and, even though I could have afforded the rent on my own, I didn’t want to jeopardize the investments I was making in my business (I was in the process of hiring an assistant to handle my scheduling). Plus, we agreed from day one that we would be 50/50 on rent and I would take care of the rest of the bills because I earned more. I felt that if his financial situation was in jeopardy, he needed to talk to me about it.
I tried to approach him a bit differently than last time. I asked him if there was anything I could do to help. I told him about my slasher friend and how maybe she could give him advice if he didn’t want any from me. But he said he needed to figure stuff out on his own and that if he couldn’t get himself off the PIP then he would go back to work for his dad’s janitorial company.
I let it go. I was worried but I didn’t want to fight again just after patching the holes from the last blow out. It really bugged me that he thought I didn’t believe in him so I committed to giving him the benefit of the doubt. I said okay and asked him if he needed me to meal prep for both of us that week. He offered me grocery money, but I said it was fine since I’d had to deal with a lot of humans breaking in lately and I still had some leftover in the dungeon.
Fast forward a month. Boyfriend got off the PIP super fast. He worked his way off of it over Spring Break and started taking on a lot of extra assignments. In just four weeks he went to Miami Beach twice, New York City twice, and to three separate summer camps. I missed him and it was hard not having him around but I remembered how he said he needed to focus on his career and I tried not to nag.
It was hard not to nag though. With him gone, all the housework fell on me. We rent a 19th century manor, and its upkeep really does need two people. Doing all the chores plus running my business started to really drain me. Even when he was home, he forgot to banish the ghosts (my chore is to kill all invading humans, and his chore is to banish their ghosts) and he never took out the trash. I think he cleaned blood off the dungeon walls once, but then I had to basically redo it because he missed a lot of spots.
But still, I didn’t say anything because he was doing really well at work and I didn’t want to ruin that for him. Even when Humans started breaking in every week, I didn’t complain even though it interrupted my work day.
Last month though, I did ask him if we could move somewhere that needed less maintenance. There were just way too many Humans breaking in and I didn’t have the time to deal with them anymore. Even if I don’t do all the theatrics I used to as a Cryptid, killing humans through fear still takes a lot of time. He asked me if I didn’t appreciate the free meat, and I said I would appreciate it more if I wasn’t the only butchering it.
He said he didn’t want to move because he was really close to getting promoted to regional Nightmare and he didn’t want to take time off work to move. I was so surprised that I couldn’t hide how surprised I was. He saw and got offended. He asked if I still didn’t believe in him. I said that I did, but it was a huge jump to go from an 8% kill rate to getting promoted.
He got even more mad at me for bringing up his stats and he said that he had nearly 80% kill rate since being put on the PIP. I asked how many humans a week he was slashing and he told me I was being too nosy and that was proof that I didn’t believe in him.
I asked him if we could at least hire a ghoul then to keep the humans out of my office and he said he didn’t want to waste the money that we should be saving for our new house. I asked him what he wanted me to do then? I had to take phone calls for my consulting business and it was really hard to stalk humans all around the house while trying to sound like a professional to my clients.
He asked me to be patient for one more month. He said if he met quota for one more month, his boss said he’d get promoted. So I said fine and let it go.
Fast forward to now, almost a full month later.
Last Friday, I attended the Eldritch Conference. For those not in the scare field, the Eldritch Conference is the most prestigious event in our industry. It’s invitation only and is a chance to network with all the big players in the field. Mothman, the Jersey Devil, Bloody Mary and Bigfoot all spoke this year and both my former company, Grudge Industries, and my boyfriend’s current company, Forgotten Summer Solutions, were invited.
I was surprised to get an invite as a solo contributor to the field. However, my consulting firm has really been doing well and I did land a seasonal contract with the Yeti Co-op which I guess is how they heard about me. Plus, I’ve been a speaker before so I think the organizers knew I would behave myself.
I was planning on telling my boyfriend that I was going, but he was out of town on a co-ed sleepover assignment. He usually doesn’t have his phone on during his assignments, so I didn’t bother calling him. I just figured it’d be nice if we ran into each other at the conference if he made it back in time.
Which brings me to what actually happened (apologies for the long post).
So everything went great for my part of the day. I got to network with a lot of individual businesses and even got to reconnect with Blood Mary who I knew back in my Cryptid days. I told her I was dating a Slasher from Forgotten Summer Solutions and invited her to come with me to check out their booth. I thought it would be fun to grab dinner with her after since I assumed if my boyfriend was there, he’d be going out with coworkers which he often does. Plus, I admit, I was showing off a little. I don’t often get the chance to brag about my Cryptid days.
She agreed and we went over to see if my boyfriend was there.
I introduced myself to the people manning the booth. My boyfriend wasn’t there, but a few Slashers recognized my name and greeted me. They were definitely in awe of Bloody Mary (she came in full uniform) and invited us to look at their displays. They had portfolios for each Slasher on the desk as a sort of preview of what their services looked like.
While Bloody Mary looked through the portfolios, I chatted with my boyfriend’s coworkers. They said they were thrilled to work with him and that, even though he had a really rough start, it was impressive how quickly he started meeting his goals. Something about how they talked about his work kind of didn’t make sense. They were talking like he was killing a dozen humans a week, but he’d told me that he was at 80% on his assignments which typically only offer about ten humans each.
I asked them about it and they said that he’d been Slashing during After Hours which is a new goal supplement program his company launched a few months ago. Basically, anyone can sign up for After Hours and the company counts human kills done in uniform as part of their quota. I asked them if this was available to them while they were on assignment and they said no, it had to be done when they had down time. I asked them how my boyfriend was part of that when he was traveling all the time and they looked confused. One of them said that my boyfriend is still getting one assignment per week and is then supplementing his kill rate with After Hours.
At that point, I was even more confused. It sounded like my boyfriend had been lying to me then, because he told me that he was getting at least two assignments a week. If he was only getting one, then where was he going when he said he was traveling?
Bloody Mary interrupted before I could say anything and asked how their Slashers did their kills. They said that every Slasher at their company is required to use a standard issue weapon (like a machete or axe) for their kills to count. They said their company doesn’t count accidents as part of their quota (like falling or heart attacks).
Bloody Mary pulled me aside and showed me the portfolio she was holding. She said that she was going to give me a chance to explain without them overhearing and showed me the book. She said that a bunch of kills in it looked Cryptid kills. And she said, specifically, it looked like the kills I made when I was a Cryptid. I took the book from her and flipped through it and she was right, they really did look like Cryptid kills. Worse, I recognized a few of the Humans from the past few weeks. They were actually my kills!
Kill stealing is a major taboo in our industry.
I told her I didn’t know anything about this. She looked really relieved at that and said that even though I wasn’t a Cryptid anymore, it would look really bad for me if I was caught helping a Slasher cheat at their job. It could affect my business which she’d only heard good things about.
I’m embarrassed to say that I tried to defend him. He’s new to our industry so I thought it might be a mistake. He might not be trying to cheat, this could be a misunderstanding.
She said she didn’t think so because a mistake would be one or two of my kills mixed in with his, not the entire book.
I counted up how many photos were in the book and, all told, of the 146 kills, at least 100 were mine. I couldn’t really say it was a mistake at that point and I was just staring at his portfolio like an idiot. Bloody Mary asked me what I was going to do because, mistake or not, this looked really bad and could damage my reputation if it got out.
At that moment, another man walked up to booth and asked us if there was a problem. I knew that if I said anything, I would be jeopardizing my boyfriend’s job, but if I didn’t say something, I was jeopardizing my business.
I told my boyfriend’s coworkers that he was lying about his body count. I said I didn’t think that they knew he was doing it, but over half of the kills in his portfolio weren’t his and I suggested they remove it from their display before another Cryptid came by and realized it.
The other man thanked me for bringing this to his attention and asked how we knew. Bloody Mary said that she knew another Cryptid’s kills and I had to tell them that I was that Cryptid, though I was retired now. He asked me if I knew my boyfriend was doing this, and I told him no.
I told him I really didn’t want to get my boyfriend in trouble and suggested that maybe he didn’t know those kills didn’t belong to him because they happened in our house. I was grasping at straws and Blood Mary even looked sad for me. His coworkers looked skeptical but tentatively agreed. The man – who turned out to my boyfriend’s boss – said that they would investigate this thoroughly and apologized personally for his employee’s misconduct.
I was spiraling at that point so I thanked him and said I wasn’t mad, I was just looking out for both of our reputations. He promised to keep it between us and I agreed.
Then I apologized to Bloody Mary because I didn’t feel like eating dinner anymore. She said she understood and wished me well.
I went home and did a quick perimeter search of the property. Sure enough, there were human summoning stones ALL OVER the yard. Which means my boyfriend was intentionally luring humans to our house to get me to kill them so he could take credit. It wasn’t a mistake at all.
My boyfriend came home later that night in his work clothes. As soon he got inside he started yelling. He said he was suspended without pay and that all his hard work was for nothing.
I said I knew he’d been stealing my kills and he almost ruined my reputation. He said they still counted as his kills because he did all the work of luring the humans to our house.
I told him that wasn’t how it worked and he knew it. He said it was the same as setting a trap and I was taking this too seriously. I told him that, as a Slasher, he has to use a weapon to get his kills, not me. He said I was basically the same thing since I had such a high kill rate. I asked him if he was calling me an object.
(My parents exploited me by selling me as a haunted doll through a lot of my childhood and he knows I’m sensitive to being called an object.)
He backpedaled at that point and asked if I didn’t want to buy a house together. He said he was doing it for us and I should’ve understood and not said anything. I told him that when I was a Cryptid I had my pride and would’ve never done this.
He said I needed to tell his boss that he was the one who made all those kills. I said it wasn’t me who recognized them as Cryptid kills and now his boss knew too. He accused me of thinking I’m better than him because I have telekinetic powers and can move through shadows and can possess people, while he’s basically a human himself. I told him of course not and that I worked hard for those powers unlike him.
He got really mad at that and actually charged at me with his machete raised. I don’t think he was going to actually hit me, but I reacted like he was. It was all instinct. I disarmed him and I swear I heard a crack when I grabbed his wrist. I shoved him into the wall.
He crumpled to the floor and started crying. He said sorry and sort of curled up around his wrist. He said he didn’t ever feel like he was enough for me and he didn’t even know why I was still with him. He called himself a bunch of names and said I would be better off without him.
I sort of awkwardly stood there for a minute. On one hand I wanted to assure him that he was enough and that I loved him, but, on the other, I wasn’t sure I could forgive him. He nearly ruined my reputation, and he embarrassed me in front of Bloody Mary. Plus, I still didn't know where he’d been going all those times he said he was on a business trip and apparently wasn’t.
So I ended up not saying anything. I went to our room and started packing a bag. He followed me. He was still crying as he begged me not to go. He said he would own up to his kill steals at work and he would make it right. He pleaded for me not to leave him and that he would give up slashing.
I told him I needed space to think. He tried to grab me, but I shadow walked out of the house. I heard him screaming from outside and I hurriedly drove away.
Now I’m at my friend’s house and I told her everything. She agreed I did the right thing walking away from him, but when I asked her what I should do she hesitated. She said that my boyfriend wasn’t right to kill steal but, as a fellow Slasher, she understood what he was going through. She said I wouldn’t understand the pressure to meet quota because I was always surpassing mine when I was in the field. She said that a Cryptid could never understand a Slasher.
She also said that nobody would have found out about his kills if I hadn’t brought them to his boss’ attention. She said the only time kills are on display like that is at the Eldritch Conference and by the next one, he’d have had kills of his own. She thinks that if I’d just confronted him at home, he wouldn’t be on suspension.
So now I’m worried that I overreacted when I told my boyfriend’s coworkers that he was lying about his body count.
AITA?
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*shows up after a month of radio silence* hey. yeah. sorry i'm back. it still hasn't warmed up enough for me to attempt Tris's faceup(+i am scared af) so. i still feel weird posting him. i made him a new shirt so if i ever actually catch a moment when the suns out will try and take pics -_-)
anyway. i was stalking imomo/s weibo and this product photo has me so tilted. I should have ordered a Tiamat head instead of an Apsu. fuck it looks so good. posting it just for like. reference. if things really don't work out with his current head i will get a Tiamat next time.
#knightly missives#i also saw a lot of pics of their 75 cm guys and wah. i really really want one#i SWORE i would finish Tristan before i buy any other dolls and i will stand by that so help me god#but. i can look right >_<#anyway. the lack of posting is mostly from a lack of motivation i guess. it's a lot more work then i thought to get my baby looking good#i feel like I'm just out posting pictures of my ugly poorly dressed unfinished doll and I'm like. this is embarrassing i can't do this#i can't get him dressed right he doesn't have a face i can't pose him I'm in SHAMBLES#also the wig i bought is ugly. i keep hoping it'll grow on me but it IS NOT#but i can't order a new one right now...#i'll be honest. my silly little project focus is COMPLETELY on the little Rein Shrine i'm planning on making#so like. my spare money is tied up entirely buying shit for that. a wig is not in the cards til i'm finished.#i want to buy toploaders and acrylic stands and custom keychains and itabag rosettes and - it's all i can think about right now#i guess thats more of the reason then anything else >_> eventually my focus will shift back to Tris i am confident. just not right now#once he's looking a little better hopefully
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