#I took it home but i feel very conflicted about that bc it *should* be left in the forest it came from to maintain the nutrient cycle etc
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I found a stick-o-lichen XDD (more close ups below the cut, click for a better picture etc etc)
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#I could barely contain my glee#I have been showing these pictures to literally everyone today#lichen#biology#moss#lichenology#I took it home but i feel very conflicted about that bc it *should* be left in the forest it came from to maintain the nutrient cycle etc#i think i will take it back next time i visit the forest
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there’s like specific parts in act 3 I really like for shri’iia’s oathbreaking arc bc I think it’s not linear, and even if shes pursuing that path there’s still a chance for her to regress/turn back and remake her oath/follow lolth again. like I don’t think fully turning away from lolth is something she’s able to do in that moment considering that she was quite literally raised in that cult, and even though she recognises now how lolth only has victims not followers I think she is still able to find some comfort in the spider queen’s shadow (no matter how hostile it is) just because it’s what she was raised under, and what she knows. to her, it’s home.
so the parts im talking about is post cazador and post house of grief. hag romance aside (and it’s such a Big Thing for hag romance too) I like doing that quest for Shri’iia because her new oath now compels her to free the unfortunate spawns when before she would’ve left them to their fate and not give them any thought. But now she does care, and she knows what it feels to not be given a choice and what matters to her isn’t essentially freeing them - but rather, giving them the chance to choose for themselves. if they choose to run away and be free then she will help them, but if they choose to just die then she’ll help them too. The ability to choose and to have that free will is what matters to Shri’iia, and that’s like the very definition of her new Oathbreaker oath.
but then there’s also the hag romance conflict where Astarion - out of his own fear - thinks that he should ascend instead. He thinks he needs that power so no one can control him, and he could be free. And prior to the Cazador fight I think they’re also starting to argue about the ascension esp when she found out other souls are bound to the rituals bc her oath compels her to free them, but he thinks he needs that power so no one can touch him anymore. So it’s a touchy subject for the both of them, and the romance between them is still something new and fragile and they’re both learning how to love so it’s a veryy hmmm tense situation.
And in the moment where he asks for her help so he can ascend, I can actually see her threatening to kill him if he doesn’t back down. And I think that’s the point where she actually realises two things - a) she’s in love with this man because the thought of killing him will break her but she knows herself enough that she will do it b) even though she thinks she’s free, she’s still oath-bound. This new oath isn’t fully liberating her; she’s still following her own set of tenets and those can still be used against her or to control her. And i think that realisation will disarm her a little bit because she thinks she’s changed, and she’s a more idealised version of herself but then isn’t she still the same …? She’s still mindlessly following her tenets but they just took on a different form now. And there’s still a chance for someone to come along and deceive her, and use her the same way her Matriarch has used her so what changed exactly? And I think it’s soooo important for her to experience that doubt bc she can’t just be jumping from one cause to another without actually thinking about it, and fully realising what it is.
So post Cazador fight I just imagine her having this moment of crisis bc a) she’s in her feelings and she’s scared that she’s in love LOL b) she’s now doubting herself and this oath and now shes feeling bewildered and unsure similar to when she first broke her oath to lolth. But unlike before she will not spiral ! bc she has a support system this time ! and she’s not alone anymore !
and the other part is with the house of grief. unsure if it’s the default option but I like the route where shadowheart refuses to kill viconia so she doesn’t grant her that satisfaction and shri’iia is the one who executes her instead. and for shri’iia she has no emotional ties to viconia, she’s probably heard her name in passing as traitor of lolth and now she’s here to execute her. and it’s like she has her old oath again where she’s hunting down and executing lolth traitors but now she doesn’t feel the same gratification or satisfaction bc she understands why they would choose to betray lolth, and why they would risk it all and try to escape to the surface even though everyone up there hates them. it’s so important for her to understand that perspective, and to understand the things she did to gain the spider queen’s favour is deranged and fucked up and it was not love at all. and it also makes the route where she essentially regresses and runs back to lolth even more tragic bc she knows what’s it’s like to be free, and she knows why others choose to escape, and she understands it but she turns around and chooses to return anyway. it’s a tragic choice but it still makes sense to me imo ..!
anyway killing viconia is like the last time she kills a drow traitor. unsure if I want to keep the mirror of loss canon for her on one hand I kinda like the idea that she gives up all the memories of her matriarch, and every intel she has gathered for her, and every info that’s damning to the other noble houses to the mirror bc it’s like she’s closing that part of her life so to speak and she’s fully turning away from it but also I’m like this team is currently anti shar and we’re out here supporting bestie shadowheart we can’t be using any shar related things bc that just seems rude… so maybe it’s not canon… and now thinking about it more i don’t like how she’ll just forget all her time down there when it’s more significant that she actually does remember, and actively remember.
anyway shri’iia having a moment where her belief in her ideals wavers (which is such a 👀 moment for her bc she’s a paladin and her power relies on those beliefs) but in the end she understands that even though is following those tenets it doesn’t inherently mean she’ll be a mindless follower of it, and it’ll be used against her, and she’ll have no choice in her own actions. the presence of choice is still there and every choice is hers to make as well as every consequences are hers to bear. and just because she follows it and she wholeheartedly believes in it, I think she’s not entirely bound to it to the point of damnation. she is able to refuse and to ignore if she needs to, bc the only approval that matters - the only decision that matters - the only choice that matters - is hers..!! and that’s what this freedom means, and it’s something that was out of her grasp before but now it’s hers and it’ll be hers forever wooohoooo
#honestly wish u can change tags bc shri’iia (in her oath breaking route) changes to seldarine drow instead bc she’s not a lolth follower#anymore. but she also doesn’t follow any gods either she’s not exactly jumping into worshipping eilistraee#maybe she will in the future but currently she is Not ! she’s had enough of figures trying to use her !#but I love shri’iia’s arc sm that’s why it’s so hard for me to play other chars#like u want me to move on from the girlie who’s inspired by asos jaime arc bffr..#shut up about bg3.#bg3 spoilers
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ok so i am home from my vacation and i have only had time to watch bdubs' SL pov and hlf of cleo's rn. regardless wanted to ramble my thoughts on this session and fair warning it isnt gonna be super positive (the short: didnt really like it) so yeah.
reminder though i absolutely Love these people. i love how they play and theyre great and im watching first and foremost bc i like seeing them have fun. my issues lie in the series' mechanics, how it plays, the technical function, management etc.
the thing about watching one pov is i feel like it can also spell out other issues but i will get to that later
obviously the big thing. the "infection" task. listen.... the concept of a boogeyman infection by itself is cool! i like that! but.... not here?????? out of all series.
there is no regen, and this fact is conflicting to me because i feel like the boogey should be struggling against those theyre trying to infect, and minecraft's regen would be that struggle, like it has been for every past boogey chasing their targets.
you have to kill everyone not red? not red???? so like 90% of the server? insane.
this was an EASY TASK........... this pisses me more on what this season's rules have been implied to be. suddenly, they arent really making sense. i will go into this deeper.
this just doesnt seem like the right place to plant this task. it is hugely impactful and feels like it is happening for no reason. if they were going on like 10+ episodes and grian was formally like "well, secret keeper wants this wrapped up so lets see what task hes gonna give all of us!" and then boom, this is it. then cool. make up a proper excuse like wrapping up the season.
it was too much of a shocker, unprepared for, and with how intense it is by needing to kill everyone left it feeling very unfair to the people i was watching. Bdubs had just died previously and now lost all his hearts in one session because of the force of another task. as did many others. if there was to even be any slight alteration to more "fairness" it could have been "the one you killed is now boogey. hand them the book and make them kill someone by themself. you are no longer infected. you cannot kill the person who killed you." or something idk. every part of the server going after one person is way too much.
regarding rules and whatnot, i was already kind of annoyed by this previous session too. there are two tasks now that have me going "how tf is this "easy"?" Bdubs' task of chicken causing damage-- an amount that had to go as high as anyone could stand it-- seems way too harsh as an easy task. there were a few tasks where health could be lost, but none of it was deliberate "lose as much as possible". losing the same amount of health as another player (like grian and joel) is not the same as telling the player they basically need to lose as much as possible compared to someone else in order to win the challenge. grian and etho's hard tasks took a lot of damage (to others mostly lol) but it was a destructive hard task. bdubs' with the dragon was as well.
but gem's task especially... i mean, holy crap. that is a red life's task, or a hard task at most! even if i liked the whole thing i think id still be on the page of saying that is not an "easy" task. a red life getting this task would have been interesting too because it would put a ton of risk on them to survive and get it done. and sure, theyd get some allies in the infected but theyd still be a target in the fights. that would have been tense for them!
cancelling out all of the others' tasks when they were infected made sense but it totally changed the direction of people's videos. it forced them to be different to everyone. suddenly the first quarter or half of the video is just void and pointless. when the tasks basically direct their entire motive and how they act towards everyone, forcing them into big choices they cannot change, i think its bad. social tasks that pass off as kind normal are funny (etho's weeping angel, get scar to talk abt star wars, compliment ppl when they take damage etc), or outward and confusing but not character controlling ones (kill the dragon, connect your base to others, etc). ones that direct a player so strongly shouldnt ruin their interactions with everyone else either (playing tag-- took up a lot of time but players were "neutral" to everyone and carried on as normal).
some people were saying this task could be to speed up the series. im not really sure abt that. regardless i am sure they thought this would just be an interesting thing to do and thats why they did it. (i have seen martyn on here sometimes talking vaguely abt tasks being random and whatnot and no offense to him but it doesnt sound like at all he does have all the information to knowing this. i mean, why would he? hes a player. the admins are doing things he has no clue about. hes not even firmly stating anything. hes just saying what he knows, which i dont think is at all everything the admins are doing in front of them). i have seen this series play with many balance issues through its lifetime and i think this season esp shows a lot of that again. grian stated around one season how theres no play testing really. the admins might run some stuff i guess but theyre not testing much. and thats very obvious when limlife had that issue of deaths not showing in chat (and hey look, it happened again!) or boogey kills in LL and LimLife (along with normal kills in Lim) not being detected by means that were not direct (mechanically this just happens, you cant fix it. but they did not prepare to deal with this at all and it was chaotic to watch in Limlife and caused a lot of confusion on who got time).
i have repeating some of these things about SL already so i dont want to drone on again. i have been kinda neutral to SL because many eps were fine, i didnt love every task (personally didnt like etho getting so many "out of character" ones, like please give this man a break he is so socially awkward its hard to watch). but this session and last session have me not enjoying the task concept.
from the start i just wished this season was about not being able to regen hearts and thats it. i need something simple, dude. its getting convoluted. and its obvious with the amount of hall monitoring and the amount of talk the cc have in these videos telling hall monitors to stop, to explain successes or failures, etc etc. they should have to do that. limlife already had some ppl getting picky about who got time or not but this is even more subjective and confusing!! im sure theyre still having fun and i like seeing them having fun here but as a viewer im just seeing a concept that has too much going on, stuff that doesnt have a simple yes or no answer sometimes and i dont think thats good for a series like this, one that started out so incredibly simple and straight forward.
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Mun Vs. Muse
Similarities:
we are usually logical/rational, but also have very strong feelings, and sometimes those conflict.
health conscious and yet, not necessarily great at always taking care of self.
we’re more introverted than extroverted.
we are opinionated, and the closer you are to us, the more opinions you will hear. including petty ones.
tend to be equipped or prepared compared to most, I cannot tell you how many tissues/wet wipes/a snack/etc I’ve given other students fhksjhdf.
we highly value life of any form; I have treated injuries/helped take care of sick people and animals. blood doesn’t bother either of us.
basically we both have empathetic caretaker hearts.
but also people are difficult to deal with and socializing is tiring more often than not.
once betrayed in some way/recognizing we’ve been taken advantage of, even if we do care about someone, comfortable trust is not regained easily.
rambling about a passion or due to being nervous is more common for me than him, but he does still ramble, and I definitely believe he did more often when he was younger.
I’ve been told I can be Intense sometimes when it comes to focusing on/tackling a responsibility. coughing.
oh strong responsibility sense but not like, claiming EVERYTHING, claiming our things/what we feel we should be responsible for and being dedicated toward those things. sometimes to the point of neglecting what we would actually like to do.
aligned ratch came from a village that isn’t even named canonically which I read as meaning he has Country Roots, and I am also a country person; maybe I’m self projecting but I rly do think he finds cottagecore appealing too.
we were very similar types of A-making students who took notes, studied, questioned/talked to our professors, and didn’t really party or fall for peer pressure. I am aware this is not a popular opinion for ratch bc many default to ‘party ambulance,’ but it is VERY hard for me to see that applying to aligned, nor is there any actual evidence of it that I can find (outside of a drug-equivalent's influence).
additionally, despite being the same age or younger than most of the people we interacted with as peers, there was ;;; definitely a personal maturity/priorities difference from most of them. aka, feeling older than you are and having trouble socializing casually because of it.
they are not as strong/I am aware of and thus try to keep them contained to be respectful of others, but I do have some controlling and defensive urges too fhkjahfds.
we can and will overthink often and there is no Off switch for it.
but on the other hand, we can also be calm and problem solve/react quickly under pressure, especially if anyone else present is panicking or emotionally hurting.
we have both experienced the loss of what we considered ‘home’ due to outside circumstances we could not change, even though it was not an entire planet in my case, obviously.
the older I get and the more I learn/see about the world and try to survive in it, the more cynical and tired I become; at this point I’m pretty sure if I lived several million years and saw a lot of scrap constantly, I would reach ratchet’s levels fhakjhfsdf.
we both care about the quality of our work/perfectionism to a significant degree and being rushed or learning to say ‘this is acceptable’ is very hard.
Differences:
his science knowledge level is absolutely incredible and I cannot hold a candle to it, I struggle just trying to do research to write him believably. I also think mechanics and such are neat and I do have more understanding of vehicles than average, but that is still no where near equivalent to him.
I can be be creative/find creative solutions to issues sometimes, but I am not an inventor-level of problem solver like him. I can build things if I have instructions or make an entire simple plan first, but I can’t just Do it/modify something quickly.
I am usually able to express how I feel emotionally, he does not always know how or is unwilling to do so.
he is definitely better at multitasking than I am.
I am not ambidextrious but he is.
he is stocky while I am not.
I am not in any medical or science field.
I don’t have ptsd.
I rarely nap.
#long post#[SHENANIGANS] such strange uncharted territory#[BLUE SPEAKS] ooc#sweating about the length imbalance
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s2ep6 gigantitan
this episode was fucking stupid and hawkmoth is an idiot.
i would leave it there but there was more i disliked about this episode.
the pacing was bad, they were talking too fast. the set-up was contrived. chat noir's cataclysm did nothing once again.
so much of the set-up was contrived, too. the weird mission to organize a date between marinette and adrien--the fact that the girls being there also meant they decided to help ladybug even tho that's extremely stupid and dangerous. alix is right that it's a little creepy marinette knows that much about adrien and his schedule. and the marinette says no to adrien giving her a ride home in the end??? like i know i don't like the love square at all and think they should've focused more on the power of love via friendship, they're the ones who want the love square to be a thing!! so why have her say no?? she doesn't even know why she said no, so why should we buy into that?? the writers are so incompetent!
but the thing i realized would've been a really cool character growth arc: is marinette realizing that ladybug isn't someone else, it's her. like obviously sometimes we feel more comfortable with things when it's anonymous or ppl won't be able to tell its us. but that's still a facet of ourselves.
marinette as marinette doesn't feel confident in herself, and is very shy. but she's still very smart, well-spoken, and outgoing. she can think on her feet in a pinch. and those are what ladybug is too! what would've been a cool arc or her was marrying the two sides of her. having her come to understand that she's the same person, even as ladybug, and applying that knowledge to her civilian side of her life.
and then something for adrien/chat noir if we're going to make him a deuxteragonist. but idk what it would be. he doesn't have an identity crisis, he just wants more freedom. that's not really a conflict of character.
also funny to me that to pad time for this one, the writers had to have ladybug come up with a convoluted plan, even tho chat noir is right from both a watsonian and doyalist viewpoint. watsonian in that her lucky charm is one of her superpowers that helps them save the day. doyalist in that there's never an episode we've seen where she doesn't use her lucky charm. it's like when you're watching a crime procedural and they catch the bad guy but there's still 30 mins left in the episode. if it looks like they're going to defeat the akuma but there's still 15 mins left and she hasn't used her lucky charm, we know she's not going to defeat the akuma.
now i know that it's supposed to parallel marinette and her friends coming up with a convoluted plan so marinette to spend some with adrien and it was supposed to be a learning experience or whatever. but if we only get one line from marinette about not making things too complicated, which again, didn't even get her anywhere, then that's just not enough. bc if you took that singular line out, it would look like the writers padding time. and again, it still felt that way to me, even with the line.
funny to me that ladybug talks about singing the akumatized baby a lullaby during her plan explanation, pretty sure she said chat noir could do it. only to tell him she didn't want to hear him sing like 5 mins later when they're actually luring the baby away.
anyway, this episode was a mess. hawkmoth should've known as soon as the baby couldn't see "miraculous" back to him to find another victim. also doesn't he have the power to take away an akuma's powers even after akumatization? why didn't he use it???
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Out Of Time ~ The Picture
OUT OF TIME MASTERLIST
Word Count: 925ish
Summary/Request: This is the long-awaited one-shot about the infamous picture of Y/N and Howard. “Hey Bailey! Can you do a one shot of the night the picture of Howard and Y/N dancing was taken. I always wanted to see more of their relationship since Y/N is so conflicted in taking the job as Tony's bodyguard bc of Howard. Thanks! Love your work”
Notes: This is a one-shot for my series, Out Of Time. This happens between chapter 7 and chapter 8.
Y/N was tired. It had been a long day helping with the war effort and dealing with men who didn’t believe she or Peggy should be involved. No one said those words because they were too afraid of what Steve, Bucky, and the other Howling Commandos would do to them if they did. She wasn’t officially a member of the SSR yet but was tirelessly working toward it. Y/N needed to make sure that there was no question as to if she belonged here and her abilities.
Slumping into her chair, Y/N rested her elbow on the desk and held her head in her hand. Her training wasn’t the only thing making her feel this way. Bucky and Steve had been gone for weeks now, with very little contact. The worry that Y/N felt for her brother and the man she loved was slowly consuming her.
“Long day?” Y/N jumped slightly at the sound of Howard’s voice before moving to face him. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” He walked over to the desk beside yours and sat on the edge, his hands stuffed into his pant pockets. “What are you still doing here, kid?”
“I’ve been busy with training,” Y/N responded, leaning back against her chair.
“I wanna bet that's not just what’s got you down.”
She nodded with a sigh. “Been worrying about Steve and Bucky.”
“I’m sure they’re fine. They have something more than just a country to fight for. They have you.”
“They’ll do what they can to protect the country before they worry about coming home to me… that’s what has me concerned.”
Howard studied Y/N as the two fell silent. She was looking at her fingers as they absentmindedly traced patterns on the desktop. He could almost physically see the worry. Her eyes didn’t light up like they use to, her shoulders were slowly sinking like the weight of the world was crashing down on them. She was spending more time training than even taking care of herself. He hated seeing her like this and knew he needed to do something about it.
“Come on,” Howard said. He stood up straight and held out a hand toward her. “We’re going out.”
“Howard,” Y/N shook her head. “I really don’t feel up to it.”
“You need it, sweet cheeks, more than anyone right now.” He leaned in and took one of her hands before pulling her up to her feet. “Let’s go.”
~~~
The dance hall was filled with pretty dames and soldiers, all trying to find someone to dance with and take to bed for the night. As Howard guided Y/N further into the room, she noticed the stares Howard was getting. Some of them were stares of longing, others were glares.
“How many times have you been to this dance hall?” Y/N asked.
“Uh, a few times,” Howard answered. “Can’t remember the exact number. Here we go.” He guided her into an open spot on the dance floor. Pulling her close to him, Howard started leading her in a dance.
“I’m not sure how Bucky would feel about us dancing together.”
“I’m sure Barnes won’t mind me stealing a few dances while he is away. As long as I don’t make a move. It is for your well-being after all.”
“I’m doing fine, Howard.”
“And I don’t believe you.”
Y/N sighed looking down. It felt off being in Howard’s arms but not Bucky’s. She tried not to overthink it as he continued to lead her through dance after dance.
“You have yet to smile, sweetheart,” Howard noted. “What do I need to do to make you laugh?”
“Bring my boys home,” Y/N replied.
“I will do my best but that isn’t something I can fulfill right now.”
She looked down. “I don’t know… I wish I did.”
Howard glanced around the room to try and see if there was something there that he could use to make Y/N laugh. Getting closer to her, Howard began to make comments about the couples around the room and changed his voice to mimic what he believed them to be talking about. It took a few times but Howard could slowly see Y/N easing up with a tight-lipped smile occasionally making an appearance.
Howard continued, making the voices he was doing more animated as Y/N had even begun to laugh slightly. It was a few more minutes before his joke caused Y/N to full-on laugh and throw her head back. Out of the corner of his eye, Howard noticed a flash go off. He made a mental note to chase after the photographer later to get that picture from them.
~~~
“Thank you, Howard,” Y/N said as the man escorted her back to where her room was. “I had fun and I really did need this.”
“Of course,” Howard replied. “Anytime.” The two paused in front of the room door.
“Goodnight, Howard.” Y/N leaned in and kissed his cheek. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
She turned around and disappeared into the room. Howard stayed still, his cheek burning where her lips had touched. He hated how he was forming feelings for someone who was clearly taken. And he respected Steve, Y/N, and Bucky too much to make a move. But he couldn’t allow Y/N to be as down in the dumps as she was and would continue to do things like this until Bucky and Steve came home.
#the avengers x reader#avengers x reader#howard stark x rogers!reader#howard stark x reader#marvel x reader#steve rogers x sister!reader#marvel imagine#marvel imagines#marvel fanfiction#marvel fanfic#avengers imagines#avengers imagine#howard stark imagine
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hii! i just discovered ur blog & absolutely adore ur writing🖤 especially ur writing for hidan bc he’s my fave. would u mind writing for kisame and/or yamato please? i love my underrated kings🥺
p.s keep up the good work, ur doing amazing!!
Relationship headcanons
Pairings: Yamato x reader||
Warnings: 18+, nsfw,
this has been in my drafts for ever.
Yamato
He simply cannot stress this enough. YOU ARE HIS BABY!
He treasures you like you’re the most important thing in his life. Which you are.
Your relationship with him as definitely been a roller coaster. Not in a toxic sense, more so, he’s not quite familiar with how to love you the way you need to be loved. It’s not that he doesn’t want to, or that he can’t, he just genuinely has no experience in the affection industry. Not romantically or platonically.
He is a very caring person, so he has a very good start but there are still a lot of things you’ve had to teach him overtime.
He knows that you love physical touch, and he loves it too, so that’s not a problem in your relationship. He’s so soft and gentle with you, and is actually very emotionally mature.
He’s a very collaborative person and prefers to work with you when it comes to resolving any kind of conflicts the two of you have. It’s always you and him versus the problem. As it should be!
Yamato couldn’t tell you why, but every time you wrap your arms around him during cuddle time, he gets very sleepy. You’ve mentioned that it’s probably because he feels so secure and safe that his head can finally clear up and he knows peace in that moment, finally being able to breathe.
You two can talk to each other for hours on end. And you still have so much to say to one another. You’re definitely not the silent couple.
His idea of an ideal day is working, and then coming home to spend time with you. He loves every minute he can get with you, and prefers to stay indoors where he can cuddle you.
Nsfw
He’s very gentle with you, he always takes his time, never rushing into anything.
It took you two a while to even talk about sex, let alone have it, and when you finally do, it’s even better than what you were expecting. You’re thankful for being patient and talking to each other about what you want and how you feel.
He literally delivered the exact way you asked him to on the first try. Not even one mistake.
What started off as clumsy kisses and tickles before bed, ended up becoming a very heated make out session. It all began when he unintentionally rubbed his boner along your ass while trying to hold you down in his tickle wrap. He accidentally grunted when his boner pressed right between your ass, your soft cheeks surrounding him so good he didn’t realize he was literally humping you until he heard you softly moan.
For a while you two engage in soft core stuff like this. Simply exploring each other’s bodies and getting to know what feels good and what doesn’t. And maybe he’ll make you feel so good that you both end up with a sweet orgasm.
When that phase is over you finally let him pull your shirt off and like a hungry lion, he immediately grabbed your breasts, latching onto your nipple while he gently fondles you, licking, sucking, nipping, feeding his craving for you.
From all your playing around, he knows your breasts are quite sensitive, and indulges in them until you’re tugging on his hair, on the verge of an orgasm but unable to hold out longer, your nipples very sensitive and sore at how long he’s been biting and sucking them. Your soft moans are like music to his ears and the experience is heavenly.
“Yamato!”, you whimper, the wood user finally lifting up his head to kiss you. Slow and passionate. All his moves are careful. “Yes darling?”, he says, lightly panting to try and catch his breasts, still fondling your breasts in his big hands. The way you hide your beautiful face in his chest and place his hand between your legs tells him all he needs to know, chuckling, he begins stripping your bottoms, finally ridding you of your underwear.
The two of you now looking down at your puss, Yamato slides his middle finger between your folds, starting your clitoris down to your opening, dipping his thick, long finger into your tight wetness. He’s able to only fit the the tip in, immediately pulling out at the sound of a loud whimper, making eye contact with you, only to start slowly massaging your clit, watching your lips part as a moan escaped them.
He swallows all your moans as he patiently massages you, occasionally dipping his finger inside of you to get more slick. He does this for about a minute before you’re squirming, your hand lightly rubbing his arm. Unable to further resist the pleasure, you moans grow louder, breaking the kiss and pressing your forehead against his, your hand squeezing his bicep as he stimulates you to orgasm.
“Oh baby, there you go, good girl”, he praises, managing to keep up with your arches and bucks as he kept stimulating you. “Yamato…”, you whimper, the look in your glistening eyes weary as the pleasure became unbearable. Attempting to push his arm away, he chuckled, keeping his slow rolls on your clit, adding more pressure, making your suddenly scream. Personally, you didn’t think he would actually try and overstimulate you, so this was certainly an experience. One you didn’t think would be this intense.
“What’s the matter darling?”, he asks, sucking and licking the nape of your neck, his finger still working your little button. “God!”, you cry, now whimpering like a little puppy at the constant pressure. “Please babyyyy! Uhhhhhh!”, you cry out, gasping before screaming as he suddenly picked up the pace. “Will you squirt for me?”, he whispers in your ear, his voice low and smooth in your ear, feeding off of how helpless you seem, under the control of his single finger.
The next orgasm leaves you screaming, trying and failing to crawl away from his hand, his weight keeping you under him. That’s when he decides to stop, quickly gripping the back of your knees to spread you open. “I guess I’ll have to force it out of you huh?”, you hear him say, before you feel sometimes wet and warm around your clit, your head falling back into the pillows as an intense surge of pleasure shot through your whole body, fully possessing you, making you whimper and whine.
Yamato softly sucked and slurped at your soaking pussy. You could feel his tongue all over you at the same time, occasionally dipping inside of you to stretch you open, making you violently buck your hips up, but the way he held you open restricted your movements, making you scream out loud.
“Mmmhmmm”, he moans, sucking on your clit as though he could draw another orgasm out of you. Another orgasm racks your body, clear fluid shooting out of you and into his mouth. A loud hum of approval is all you hear before you’re lost in the orgasm, actually crying as Yamato slurps and sucks at your bean, drinking up what he can, your body still being held in place by his strong arms while he devoured you.
Only god knows when this will ever end, Yamato is afraid he won’t be able to stop himself. Even seeing you crying and hearing you scream isn’t enough to make him feel the tiniest bit sympathy for you. You’re just so delicious and he’s been waiting for this for a long time.
Let the man eat please.
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MIRACULOUS FIC RECOMENDATIONS!! (Part 2)
You can find part 1 here.
The first one was really popular! So I decided to make a second part.
The rules are the same:
All of the fics will be rated Teen and up audiences or lower. Also if I don’t put the author’s tumblr is because they didn’t put it in the fic or/and I couldn’t find it.
The only thing that changes is that I would be putting the pairing in the description of the fic.
Without further ado...
Written in the Stars by Boogum (@botherkupo here on tumblr!)
Pairing: Marichat and Adrienette.
He was the god of destruction. She was a princess whose kingdom had been prophesied to fall. To save her people, she became his wife. To save him, she would have to do the impossible. The castle has secrets, the gods are watching, and time is running out.
Chapters: 37/37
TW for mild violence.
Arrange marriage, God AU. While I'm making this list, I still haven't finished the fic, but I had to recommend it because is THAT good. The way I gasped out loud while reading some of the plot twists. The worldbuilding is so good, and even if you aren't into AUs that deviate a lot from cannon like me, I 100% reccomend it.
Need a Lift? again by Boogum.
Pairing: DJWifi
Getting stranded on a foreign planet sucked. Luckily for Nino, his rival was willing to give him a lift home. Unluckily for Nino, she was beautiful and funny and he might just be in love with her.
Chapters: 1/1
Space Bounty Hunter AU! Really sweet and funny. If you are into flustered!Nino then this fic is for you.
hey, you by peachcitt (@peachcitt here on tumblr!)
Pairing: Adrienette
“Have you ever had a dream about someone that changes the way you think of them?”
or Adrien has a dream about Marinette.
Chapters: 1/1
Okay so, peachcitt is one of my favorite ml writers. Everything that they write is sooo good y'all, and i'm already a sucker for adrienette, so I cannot recommend this fic (or any of theirs) enough.
double dare again by peachcitt (I told ya!)
Pairing: Ladrien (with lots of sided ladynoir)
“Don’t ever do that again,” Marinette says, maybe a little too emphatically, and Adrien looks at her, his expression quiet. His cheeks, Marinette notices, are a little red.
“But I wanted to save you,” he says.
or Ladybug and Adrien can't seem to stop running into each other. (whether that is on accident or on purpose is nobody's business but their own, of course).
Chapters: 30/30
This was a ladrien june fic! Every chapter corresponds to the day's prompts but it also continues a story. If that doesn't make you want to read it then I don't know what it will. I fear fanfic writers, they're insane.
(not) so much by therentyoupay (@therentyoupayfanfiction here on tumblr!)
Pairing: Marichat and adrienette
(The claws are sharp, but the host of Destruction—for all of his loudmouth chaos and lack of reserve—is paradoxically careful.)
Chapters: 1/1
In which Chat Noir pays a visit not long after Marinette has made a pretty difficult decision, and they accidentally make a routine.
Prompt: Marinette gives Chat a hickey. Adrien has a suspiciously similar looking hickey the next day at school...
Gotta be honest with y'all, I did not expect this fic to be as good as it is. The adrienette has everything a stablished!Marichat should have. Marinette conflicted with her feelings? Check. Adrien being a hot mess bc That's My Girlfriend But She Doesn't Know That? Check. Them being absolute idiots? Check. It's good!
Doctor, Doctor, Give Me The News (Your Lips Is The Only Cure I Could Use) by BreG21.
Pairing: Adrienette
Rainwater sloshed up from the pools they had made on the sidewalk and coated his jean pants with every step he took. He couldn't bring himself to care.
He sniffed away some of the water that dribbled down his matted head. "Yeah?"
He paused as if to consider his words while Adrien stared down at him, so lost. "You weren't wrong when you thought you knew. A part of you wanted it to be her, but it was too perfect, you let the illusion fool you because how would you get that lucky. But trust me, Adrien. You weren't wrong."
He wasn't wrong? What was he not wrong about?
You weren't wrong. You want it to be her.
And it finally clicked as a small gasp wisped past his lips. He wasn't wrong.
In which, Plagg falls ill, and with Fu gone and Ladybug being the guardian now, has to go find her civilian self-even with the knowledge that she might not like that-is shocked to realize that even with having the kwami that was supposed to embodied the very being of bad luck, Adrien could conclude the very opposite of what he had thought for so long.
He was so very lucky.
Chapters: 1/1
I screamed so hard while reading this fic. It's just one of those who gets the characters right. Do you like a good reveal? Go read this now.
Operation Mega Sleepover by InTheWild (@smellerbeee here on tumblr!)
Pairing: Adrienette
When Alya and Nino drop out of their long awaited mega-sleepover at the last minute, it leaves Marinette and Adrien alone together for the night. An Adrinette one-shot with lots of fluff and sleepover shenanigans.
Chapters: 1/1
I just,,, I love adrienette fluff so much,,, I love them,,,
You, Me & A Little Bit Of The Future by joonapeach.
Pairing: this is a fortunate case of all lovesquare shenanigans™
Marinette expects some disaster on her first outing alone with Adrien.
She just doesn't expect that disaster to be her future self passing off a baby for her to take care of with Adrien.
(Alternatively... two idiots obliviously in love cooing over their daughter while acting like they have no idea whose kid this is.)
Chapters: 1/1
I think the description says anything that it needs to be said. It's really sweet and funny and I love how they just change their minds so quickly and get emo for literally nothing. Peak shakesperean dumbasery.
The entire Marry That Girl series by Miraculous_Max (Maximilian_Alexander).
Pairing: Adrienette
Let’s say Marinette has a special sketchbook. This sketchbook is filled with drawings of their future house, of Adrien as an adult in multiple occupational settings, of Marinette and Adrien’s wedding, and most importantly, their future children.
Let's say Adrien found this sketchbook.
Works: 8 (All are 1/1 chapters)
Just realized how this list exposes me as number 1 adrienette sucker... oh well. I love how Adrien doesn't feel weirded out by the intensity of Marinette's crush. He likes it! He's as weird and romantic as her! That's one of the reasons I love the lovesquare so much and it makes me happy to see that everyone is in the same boat with me.
Strenght by 11JJ11.
Pairing: Adrienette
Marinette knew she was much stronger than she looked thanks to being a hero. So when her class had an arm wrestling contest she knew that she could beat all of them with ease, but she wasn't expecting anyone else to come close.
Chapters: 1/1
Good ol' accidental reveal feat. the entire class shenanigans. I, once again, screamed for an adrienette fic. Who could've thought.
Super Fan by Taliax.
Pairing: Ladrien
It was a good thing Alya was holding the phone and not her, because it would have slipped from her fingers and shattered. How had she not noticed? She had been there, and somehow she’d missed her crush looking at her like she was an angel sent from heaven.
Forget the perfume ad. This picture was going to be her new desktop.
(In which Marinette realizes that she and Adrien might both be obsessive fans.)
Chapters: 1/1
Canon divergent from after Gorizilla. They're so dumb. That's my opinion on this fic.
How to Kiss Your Crush in Five Minutes or Less also by Taliax.
Pairing: Ladrien
He just needed to know if Ladybug needed Chat Noir. He didn't expect to learn just how much she wanted Adrien.
This would be the best five minutes of his life, if he didn't expect her to forget it.
Chapters: 1/1
CW for making out.
Set during Desperada. I promise there's a happy ending. Also Luka is there for some reason, felt really bad for him.
Laying Down the Rules: The Gabriel Agreste Clauses by LadyKae
Gen
Adrien leaves the manor on a dark and stormy night and seeks sanctuary at the only place he feels safe: The Home of the Dupain-Cheng Family. When Sabine learns why her dear boy is fleeing to her home in the middle of the night, she makes a personal visit to one Gabriel Agreste.
There's more rules in play, but not for Adrien and Marinette.
Chapters: 1/1
This is just Sabine going to beat the fuck out of Gabriel and it's really satifying ngl
4am. by hannieks
Pairing: post-reveal lovesquare
In which Adrien has the cat tendency to wake up their owners at stupid o'clock, and Marinette just wants to sleep. Cuteness ensues.
Chapters: 1/1
Really short but really sweet. If you like Adrien acting like a cat then you would like this.
Can I Date You(r Character)? by midnightstarlightwrites (@midnightstarlightwrites here on tumblr!)
Pairing: Adrienette
Adrien turned to her, something unreadable in his gaze. “Are you ok with this?” he asked.
And what a loaded question that was. Was she ok with it? Was she ok with the one guy she couldn’t seem to get over in real life kissing her in a game of Dungeons and Dragons? When she put it like that, it seemed a bit silly to get so worked up.
It was just a game...right?
She was ok with it, right?
“Sure,” she lied. “I’m ok with it.”
When Adrien's character falls in love with Marinette's, they decided to date in-game. What could go wrong?
Chapters: 7/?
THIS ONE IS SO CUTE. You want to scream??? Read this.
two idiots and a hamster by Boogum (again) and carpisuns (@carpisuns here on tumblr)
Pairing: Adrienette
How do you hide your superhero identity from your roommate? (spoiler alert: badly)
Chapters: 5/?
Once @anna-scribbles described this fic as "is literally the closest i’ve ever seen a fic come to matching the energy of canon", and I couldn't have described it better.
And that's all for now! Next time I will probably make an only DJWifi list since I've been treating them so dirty lol.
#miraculous ladybug#mlb#ml#marinette dupain cheng#adrien agreste#ml fanfiction#miraculous fanfiction#ml fic rec#fic rec#miraculous fic rec#lovesquare#djwifi#ladrien#adrienette#marichat#ladynoir#lovesquare fic rec#miraculous ladybug fanfiction recomendation#adrienette fic rec#marichat ric rec#ladynoir fic rec#ladrien fic rec#chat noir#ladybug#fanfiction#miraculous ladybug fanfiction#gabriel agreste a+ parenting#gabriel agreste salt
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TO LOVE AND BELOVED - Part Five (Harry Styles)
a/n: ahh idk why but writing this part took me forever! but its finally here and i can’t wait to see your thoughts on it! i was debating for a long time if part 5 should be the last one, but then i decided to add another part, bc there are two more things i want to include in the story and i couldn’t squeeze them into this part, it’s already the longest so far, so we have one more part left of the story! also, a little warning that part 6 might take a little longer than the prev parts bc im a little behind with my schedule but it’ll try my best!
pairing: CEO!Dad!Harry X Reader
warning: mentions of death, cheating and divorce, sexual content
word count: 12k
SERIES MASTERPOST masterlist
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d23e28e74861e594a4d077fc7cba691b/cb64ee367655139b-03/s540x810/d1698f9294271e3cdfcf2d799afaeedac3367ebf.jpg)
You’ve been feeling like a teenager sneaking around her parents these past weeks. Only that you’re an adult and the parent you are trying to keep your secret romance hidden from is a four year old little girl.
Your birthday was a turning point in your evolving relationship with Harry. Like a wall has been brought down and he finally started reaching out to you. It feels like with every passing day you’re getting closer to him and you can see the progress he’s been making thanks to his therapy sessions and how much he is trying to make a change himself as well.
Stolen kisses and tiny touches have been a usual in your every days whenever Izzy was out of sight for the shortest second. You’ve realized that Harry is an affectionate person, he likes to keep you close and he never fails to bring passion into the tiniest kisses.
With Izzy around 24/7 it’s been hard to find time when it’s just the two of you, but you’ve been waking up early in the morning just to spend that twenty minutes alone with Harry while he drinks his coffee. Sometimes you just sit in silence, trying to wake up for the day ahead of you but sometimes he talks your ears off about anything and everything. In the evening, when Izzy is already sleeping the two of you usually wind off together in the living room or watch a movie in the entertainment room, just enjoying some alone time. It’s not much, but more than nothing and you’ve grown very fond of these little moments with him.
Nothing more has happened than just kissing. Despite the progress Harry has made so far you can tell he still has quite a few conflicts buried deep inside him and you definitely don’t want to rush him into anything he is not ready for. Some cuddling on the couch or short but passionate make out sessions in a corner while Izzy is not paying attention, you haven’t gone further than this.
Now it’s the last day before Izzy leaves to Harry’s mum for the week. He is dropping her off Sunday afternoon and it will leave the two of you alone for seven full days. Well, Harry still has to work during the day, but from the moment he’ll get home, it’s just gonna be you and him.
You had to make a few phone calls so you’ve been locked in your room for a while now. When you come down you find your favorite father-daughter duo on the couch, some kind of Barbie movie playing on the TV, but Izzy is busy with something else. She’s got her water based flooring pens scattered around her, Harry’s tattooed arm laying across her lap as she is coloring the patterns as if it was her favorite coloring book. Before they could notice you, you run back to your room and grab your polaroid camera and returning you snap a picture of the adorable scene. The shutter of the camera makes Harry’s head snap in your way, a smile tugging on his lips.
“Hey,” he softly greets you. You put the camera and the photo aside to the cupboard near you before joining them on the couch.
“Hi Y/N! Look!” Izzy beams happily, pointing at Harry’s ship tattoo that is now fully colored with yellows, pinks and blues.
“It looks better this way,” you smirk down at her before your eyes meet with Harry’s over her head, smiling at you softly.
Making yourself comfortable next to them, you watch Izzy work on more of his tattoos and you find it such a heartwarming scene, you want to remember it forever. Harry Styles, such an influential, successful and serious businessman, sitting on the couch in his loungewear while his daughter is using his tattooed skin as her personal coloring book. He really is a wonderful human being and the best dad to his daughter.
“Y/N, do you have any tattoos?” Izzy asks, turning to you with curious eyes.
“I actually do,” you answer and you see Harry’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise.
“You really do?” he asks, his head resting on the back of the couch, turned to face you.
“Yeah,” you nod with a soft chuckle.
“Where?” Izzy asks perking up at the new information.
“Um, it’s right here,” you tell her pointing at the side of your hips, covered with your sweatpants.
“Can I color them?” she asks innocently, but Harry is quick to react.
“Izzy, you’re being a little too nosy,” he warns her as always, and she looks at you with a pouty look.
“It’s fine. Um, yeah, you can color it,” you nod.
Sliding lower on the couch you roll down the waistband of your pants until the tattoo is revealed on the side. You catch Harry’s eyes wander over the skin you are now showing and you can see a slight blush tinting his cheeks. He hasn’t seen this part of your body uncovered yet, he hasn’t even seen you in a bathing suit so far so it’s quite the new thing.
(reference for the tattoo)
The tattoo on your side is a simple yet meaningful one, dedicated to the special bond you and Trevor share. It’s a minimalistic yet beautiful piece of two koi fishes swimming in a circle, one is left blank as while the other one is black so their formation resembles the yin-yang symbol. You got it when you turned twenty, when Trevor was just in middle school, but he promised you he would get the same design when he turns eighteen that will happen in the fall.
“That looks beautiful,” Harry breathes out with a shy smile and you notice how he doesn’t ask about the meaning behind it. Not because he is not curious but because he is insanely respectful and he doesn’t want to ask something that’s too personal.
“Thanks,” you smile at him as Izzy grabs her pens and starts coloring the blank fish.
The rest of the day goes by uneventfully, Harry is clearly trying to spend as much time with Izzy as possible before her week with his mother, but you also notice that he seems to be keeping something away from you, like he is trying to bring up something but he is not entirely sure how to start the conversation.
It’s not until Izzy is put to bed that he joins you on the couch, turning to you with a serious expression on his handsome face.
“What’s up?” you ask with a soft chuckle.
“I was thinking…”
“I could see that,” you tease him, giving his knee a playful squeeze. “I’m listening.”
“Actually there are two things I wanted to talk to you about. I’m not sure which one to ask first.” He purses his lips before sighing and moving his eyes to meet your curious gaze. “So we’re gonna be alone for the next week.”
“Mhm.”
“And I thought that… if you want to, but we don’t have to, it was just an idea—so feel free to—“
“Harry,” you cut his stuttering off, moving closer with a reassuring smile. You caress the side of his face and you notice how you lean into your touch, breathing out through his nose. “Don’t be nervous, alright? Just tell me what’s been on your mind.”
“Would you go out on a date with me?” he then asks and it’s the purest thing you’ve ever seen and heard from him. The hopeful but still nervous look in his eyes makes him appear like a little boy who is asking out his first crush in middle school, afraid of rejection, when that’s the last thing he has to think about when it comes to you, but it’s still cute.
“I would love to,” you smile at him and leaning closer you peck his lips softly. “And what’s the other thing you wanted to ask?”
“Well, I’m driving Izzy over to my mum’s early in the morning and I’m staying for lunch and… if you don’t feel like it’s too much, you could… maybe come with us.”
“You want me to meet your mum?” you ask surprised.
“Well, she wants to meet you as well, but I want you to meet her, yes,” he admits with a nervous chuckle. “Gemma has told her about you and my sister likes to be nosy so she might have added a little spice into the story about us when nothing was really going on.”
“Oh my, what does she think?” you ask with wide eyes.
“Nothing bad, don’t worry,” he assures you quickly. “She just made it seem like we are… dating and all,” he adds with a nervous smile. “But I told her that it’s… I mean that we are not there… yet.”
“Oh, okay. Well, if you really want me there, I would love to go with you.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Would love to meet your mum.”
“I was afraid you’d find it a little early for this,” he admits truthfully and you can see that rationality in his thought. “We haven’t really… discussed what we are and I didn’t want to put the pressure on you.”
“Well, do you want to talk about us?” you ask softly, giving him the chance to decline if he feels like the conversation might be a little too much for him.
“I do, but I’m not sure… what to say,” he hums, knitting his eyebrows together. Last time I had this talk I was in my early twenties and I don’t even know how to start,” he chuckles shaking his head.
“Okay, then let’s just agree on some things,” you suggest and he eyes you curiously. “Neither of us is seeing anyone else, right?”
“Is that even a question in my situation?” he snorts, making a joke out of his issues clearly and you’re happy he is able to take it so lighthearted.
“Just clearing the air,” you chuckle. “So we are…exclusive.”
“Seems like it,” he nods.
“And you just asked me out on a date,” you point another detail out.
“I did. And you said yes,” he smiles, an excited shine in his eyes glimmering through his green irises.
“Yeah. So we can say we are dating? Seeing each other?” Harry chews on the terms you offered, tastes them before nodding slowly.
“I guess we could say that.”
“Okay. So… that’s what we are,” you smile at him, giving his knee another squeeze. This time, his hand finds yours and he runs his thumb across your knuckles.
“I think… I’m okay with that,” he breathes out and though it’s seemingly such an insignificant thing, you know how huge steps he has just taken forward.
“I liked the blue one better. With the white sweater,” Heather hums, watching you through the video call. You have your phone propped up on your dresser as you’re trying to figure out what to wear today.
Though you seemed completely unbothered last night when Harry invited you along with them, but now you can feel the slight panic. It’s not even because you and Harry are a thing now, you’d feel this way if you met his mother just as Izzy’s nanny. Grandmothers can be so protective over their grandchildren, you’ve met with quite a few problematic ones while you were working at the daycare and you just want Anne to like you, to trust you with Izzy as much as Harry does.
“Okay, blue it is then,” you sigh, pulling the yellow sundress off of yourself before putting the blue one back with a white sweater.
“So you guys are now official?” Heather grins at you through the screen. “Meeting his mother and all that?”
“Define being official,” you chuckle softly.
“Like, boyfriend-girlfriend?”
“Not yet. But we agreed to be exclusively dating.”
“I still can’t fucking believe that you’re scoring the hottest dad I’ve ever seen. You lucky bitch,” she sighs, sipping on her morning coffee.
“Me neither,” you scoff.
“I’m pretty sure if the mothers who got you fired knew, they would explode. Basically every woman was in love with the man and now you are the lucky woman actually getting him.”
“I guess this is karma for what they did,” you chuckle shrugging. “Alright, I gotta go, because we are leaving soon, but I’ll talk to you soon.”
“You better be! I want a detailed essay about how it went!” she grins, kissing the camera.
“Alright, bye!” you smile before ending the call.
When you get downstairs, Harry and Izzy are already down there, Harry is zipping up her bag while she is dancing around humming to herself.
“Baby, your backpack is still in your room. Can you please get it?” Harry asks her, Izzy nods and runs towards you, stopping in front of you.
“Hi Y/N! I like your dress!” she beams at you.
“Hi! Well thank you!” you smile at her before she runs past you up the stairs. “Hey,” you greet Harry and his eyes snap up to you, his pink lips stretching into a warm smile as he leans closer and kisses your cheek sweetly.
“Hi. You look beautiful.”
“Thank you. So, any tips for meeting your mum for the first time?” you ask, fidgeting with your fingers nervously. Harry reaches out and takes your hands between his so he stops the motion.
“You don’t need tips. I know my mum will like you, she is already so excited to meet you, so don’t worry.”
“If you say so,” you breathe out.
Harry puts Izzy’s stuff in the Rover and soon buckles her into her seat before the three of you hit the road. Harry has a whole playlist for Izzy’s favorite songs so you obviously listen to that along with Izzy’s performance of all the songs, filled with misheard lyrics, but that’s what makes it even better. The car ride is about three hours, which is not that horrible. You need just one bathroom break sometime in the middle and Izzy sleeps through the last hour in the car, allowing the two of you to finally listen to music that’s not from a kids’ show.
“Do you have a song request?” you smile over at him, scrolling through his phone since it’s the one connected to the car, but he has given you permission to play whatever you like.
“Not really.”
“You don’t have songs you like to listen to in the car?”
“Not specifically. Do you?”
“Oh, I have a whole playlist for songs to blast in the car,” you chuckle.
“Really? And what songs are on it?”
“Well, I can just show you.”
You search up your user on Spotify and find the playlist in talk before putting it on shuffle. As the first song starts to play, you peek over at him to see his reaction and you spot the smirk on his lips.
“Black Eyed Peas?” he asks glancing at you shortly.
“Yeah, you don’t like them?” you smirk at him.
“I do, I just didn’t think you listen to them,” he admits with a soft chuckle.
“Are you kidding me? They give me the biggest nostalgia! I listened to them so much as a teenager.”
“So teenage Y/N gave a concert in her bedroom, singing I Gotta Feeling?” he teases you grinning.
“Not just a concert, a whole world tour.”
There’s a short silence, just the two of you listening to the song, you watch the trees and fields rush by you as you drive down the country road. The song changes to another one and you’ve already forgotten about what you talked about, but apparently not Harry.
“What were you like as a teenager?” he asks. You turn to face him and your eyes meet for a second.
“Um, like a normal teenager,” you shrug, not sure what to say.
“There’s no such thing as a normal teenager,” Harry smiles. “What did you do, what were your favorite things?”
“I was… pretty plain, if I might say. I wasn’t a rebel or too much of a geek either. I had like three good friends, we used to hang out a lot by the little lake near our neighborhood, that was like our spot. I liked going on hikes and I watched a lot of documentaries,” you admit with a small smile.
“What kind?”
“I don’t know, anything that was on,” you shrug. “My mom had this phase where she was trying to act like she was just like all the other mom’s from my school, but they were all at least a decade older than her. She was trying to prove that she was this mature, very serious woman who had her shit together and all that.”
“And she didn’t?” Harry asks peeking at you shortly.
“I mean, she did. She turned thirty when I was twelve. Most women barely just got married and started their family at that age but she had been married for eight years and had a middle schooler and a baby already. She really was mature but I could tell that she felt like she lost her twenties because of… me.”
Sighing you think back to the years when you often felt like a burden to your mom. She gave up a lot of things just to give you the life she imagined for you. She worked her ass off to raise you and later Trevor as well, have a career and do all the works around the house. Your dad was working a lot of night shifts, there were entire weeks when you barely even saw him. You don’t blame him, he was trying to provide for his family, but it’s pretty clear he and your mother grew cold over the years and it had a huge part in it.
“Do you… blame yourself for it?” Harry asks softly.
“No,” you shake your head. “It’s not like I had anything to do with being born,” you chuckle. “I just didn’t like seeing my mom struggle so much. So when Trevor was born I was trying to take over a lot of tasks around the house and with him as well. I babysat him a lot, took care of him in the mornings, I picked him up from daycare and later from school… I tried to make it easier for my parents.”
“So this is why you grew so close with him?”
“I guess so,” you nod. “I mean, I surely spent the most time with him,” you add with a short chuckle.
“And do you think this is why you’re so good with kids?”
“What is this, a therapy session?” you ask arching an eyebrow at him, but he just rolls his eyes.
“Just… trying to get to know you. Is that a problem?”
“No, I just… I’m not used to talking about myself so much. It’s been quite a few years since I’ve been in this… talking stage,” you admit with a sigh. “But to answer your question, it might have had some impact on me. I mean, I loved taking care of Trevor. It’s like I had my own baby doll, only that it wasn’t just a toy, it was a real baby I could play with.”
“Did you play dress up with him?” Harry smirks at you.
“I did,” you admit laughing. “I used to dress him as a princess a lot and he seemed to like it! My dad wasn’t really a fan of it.”
For the rest of the ride you listen to your playlist and talk about not just your but Harry’s past too. He tells you about his friends, what he was like in school and the mischiefs he did growing up, that drove his mum crazy sometimes. As you get to his hometown and he points out different places he used to go to when he was younger, you feel so much closer to him, like you’ve just gotten to see another piece of him that was hidden before.
He pulls up to the driveway of a simple townhouse and as you get out of the car you see the front door open and a woman rushes out, squealing in excitement as she runs up to Harry and hugs him tightly.
“Finally! I was starting to get worried!” she breathes out, rocking the two of them to left and right.
“Mum, don’t be dramatic. I texted you when we left and we got here perfectly in time,” Harry chuckles, holding his mum tight.
“You barely just arrived and you’re already picking on me? Typical,” Anne rolls her eyes, letting go of him. You round the car, feeling nervous to meet her. When her eyes finally fall on you, her smile grows even wider as she takes a step closer to you. “And you must be Y/N! It’s so nice to meet you!” she beams, pulling you into a warm hug as well.
“Nice to meet you too,” you chuckle, hugging her back.
“I’m Anne, but I listen to all versions of mum and grandma,” she tells you chuckling.
“Alright, noted,” you nod smiling.
Harry opens the car door of the backseat and unbuckles Izzy who has already woken up from her little nap and the moment her feet are on the ground she runs up to Anne.
“Grams!” She giggles before throwing herself into Anne’s arms who picks her up happily.
“Hi baby, you grew so much! I missed you!” she sighs as the little girl cuddles into her neck.
“Missed you too, Grams. I brought my new toys, do you want to play with them?”
“Of course! We’ll have all the time to play this week,” Anne smiles down at her. “Alright, come on in. Lunch is almost ready.”
Harry grabs Izzy’s things from the car and you all head inside. The house smells good from the cooking food in the kitchen and it’s such a cozy home, you can definitely see Harry growing up here. Above the fireplace in the living room there are a bunch of photos framed on the wall, most of them are from Harry and Gemma, but there are some more of other relatives as well, cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents. It seems like Harry has a big family.
Harry unpacks Izzy’s stuff in her room that used to be Gemma’s apparently, he is telling Anne all about everything she needs to know about Izzy’s routines and she is listening patiently, though you’re sure she is more than capable of taking care of her. After all, she raised two amazing children already.
While Izzy shows Anne all her toys she’s brought with herself, Harry takes your hand and pulls you out of the room just to go into another one. Walking in you immediately realize that it must have been his once upon a time.
“You know, I can see your younger version in here, the one I saw in the photos downstairs,” you smirk at him, looking around. There are some old posters and pictures still littering the walls, stickers are covering the side of his wardrobe and dresser, some of them are partially ripped off already, he probably tried to get rid of them once he got older, but miserably failed.
“Yeah? I was pretty cute, right?” he smirks, so full of himself.
“I liked the curly Justin Bieber hairstyle,” you tease him and he gives you an “are you for real?!” look to which you just start laughing.
“Justin Bieber had nothing on me.”
“Yeah, sure,” you laugh before he grabs your hand and pulls you against his chest, wrapping his arms around you. “Your mum is in the next room,” you whisper against his lips as he leans down, teasing you with them just lingering on yours.
“So what? You never sneaked around your parents before?” he smirks down at you.
“I did,” you admit.
“Oh, nasty,” he comments before finally kissing you. However it doesn’t last long, because you hear footsteps coming from outside so you’re quick to move away from each other, just in time when Anne walks in.
“Lunch will be ready in a few, would you two mind setting the table?” she smiles, oblivious what was happening just a moment ago.
“Sure,” Harry nods, rubbing his nose as his other hand finds your waist and he ushers you out of the room.
Izzy helps Anne in the kitchen while you and Harry take care of the table. When everything is done you all sit down and start the feast Anne was so kind to make for you. It doesn’t take long to see the snickering but loving dynamic between Harry and his mother. Anne likes to pick on her son, call him out for basically anything and though Harry talks back, he mostly just lets her tear him to pieces. With love, of course.
“Izzy, please don’t get whipped cream all over the place!” Harry sighs when it’s time for dessert. Anne has made apple pie, one of Izzy’s favorites and she is going generous with the cream on top of her slice.
“You didn’t have problem getting cream all over you when we were making cupcakes, daddy!” Izzy sasses back, making both you and Harry drop your jaws while Anne starts laughing at her boldness.
“That was an entirely different situation, Izzy,” Harry shakes his head as he helps her with the scream before passing it over to you.
“Grams, you should have been there! Daddy, Y/N and I made a mess in the kitchen, but daddy started it!” Izzy giggles, digging into the pie.
“Is that so?” Anne smirks.
“We were just… playing,” Harry explains.
“Oh, I know how you can get when you’re just playing,” Anne chuckles. “Y/N, how do you put up with two kids in the house?”
“I used to deal with fifteen at the same time, so two is not a trouble,” you smirk at Harry who just rolls his eyes, but you see the hiding little smile on his lips.
After lunch Izzy insists on showing you the dollhouse Anne has set up for her in the backyard while Harry helps his mum with the cleaning up.
“We both know your sister likes to exaggerate stories, so I didn’t believe everything she said about you and Y/N,” Anne speaks up as she is washing the dishes and Harry is on drying duty.
“I’m glad you don’t fall for Gemma’s vivid imagination.”
“But there’s one thing she got right.”
“And what would that be?” Anne turns the tap off as she faces Harry, sighing in relief as she smiles at him.
“That you look happy.”
Harry opens his mouth to say something, but then just closes it. He does feel happy, even if he is still struggling to accept it. Anne dries her hands and reaching up she cups Harry’s face in her palms.
“Baby, I haven’t seen you like this for a long time. And I know you think you don’t deserve to feel this way, but you do. And Y/N makes you happy, clearly.”
“Mum…”
“No, honey, just… listen to me, okay?” she asks and he nods, giving all his attention to his mother. “It broke my heart to see you so… lost after what happened to Maggie. And I know that it was the hardest thing you ever had to go through, but you need to move on. She would want you to do the same thing.”
“How do you know, mum? You didn’t even like Maggie when I first brought her home,” Harry points out mumbling under his breath.
“That doesn’t change the way you felt about her. I know you loved her and I would have never wanted anything to happen to her. She made you happy and that’s all that mattered to me,” she smiles with a tired sigh. “And I just want you to be happy again. Whatever you two have going on… don’t let go of it, alright? She is making you happy and you deserve that.”
Harry doesn’t know what to say so he just nods before Anne pulls him into a tight, motherly hug that he returns gladly.
“I’m trying, mum. I’m trying,” he whispers into her hair, giving her a squeeze before letting go of her.
You stay a little longer, Anne makes you tea and Harry soaks in the last minutes with Izzy before he is forced to be away from her. You know he is looking forward to spending some time away from his daddy duties, but it’s clear that he’ll miss her terribly too.
“Alright, baby. Be good and I’ll call Grams to talk to you every day, okay?” Harry tells her, giving her one last hug. Izzy wraps her arms around his neck tightly, her face squished into his neck.
“Okay, daddy. I love you,” she mumbles with a pouty look.
“I love you too. Have a good time with Grams.”
“Thank you for everything, Anne,” you tell her, giving her a quick hug.
“Oh, you’re welcome. It was so nice to meet you,” she smiles, feeling a little touched by the goodbye. “Come back soon!”
“I will, thank you.” “Bye mum, call me if anything comes up,” Harry tells her, hugging her as well.
“We’ll be alright, don’t worry. Tell Mitch and Sarah that I wish them the best!” Anne smiles as you and Harry head out the door.
“I will! Bye!”
Izzy stands at the front door with Anne, waving after you as Harry backs out of the driveway and eventually, they are out of your sight.
Harry falls silent and you don’t have to be a genius to know that he is already missing Izzy. You can imagine what it feels like to not see her every day like he always does, when he is so used to having her around all the time.
“You alright?” you softly ask, giving his arm a short squeeze.
“Yeah, it’s just… It’s the third time I’m doing this, but it never gets easier. The first year we did it I ended up driving up here four times that week,” he admits with a chuckle.
“Nothing to be ashamed of. It’s normal to miss her.”
“I know, it just makes me emotional,” he admits, flashing you a short smile before he turns his gaze back at the road ahead of him.
The drive back home is a lot quieter than the way to Anne’s. You play some music again and Harry hums to it sometimes, but he is mostly just deep in his thoughts and you don’t want to bother him, knowing well he probably needs some time to settle with the thought of an entire week without Izzy.
You get some takeout for dinner before arriving home and eat together before putting on a movie to watch in the entertainment room. One movie turns into another and before you could realize it, you’re dosed off on the comfy couch, cuddled to Harry’s side near midnight.
When you wake up something entirely different is playing on the screen since the original movie has ended long ago. Harry is passed out, his head resting against the back of the couch, one arm curled around your shoulders while the other is resting on his stomach. Rubbing your eyes you check the time and decide it’s better if you both just go to bed before you end up spending the night on the couch.
“Hey… H,” you softly caress his cheek before you brush his unruly curls back from his forehead. He scrunches his nose adorably before his eyes flutter open, taking in his surroundings. “We fell asleep. Why don’t we call it a night?” you ask in a soft whisper. Harry sighs, nodding his head, squeezing you to his side before his arm falls from around your shoulders. You peck his cheek before pushing yourself up from the couch. He shuts the TV off and the two of you head upstairs. For your surprise, his hand finds yours on the way up the stairs, lacing his fingers together with yours.
You pad your way up to the second floor and walking past Izzy’s room Harry stops for just a heartbeat before he follows you down the hallway. When you’re about to let go of his hand to head into your own bedroom, Harry pulls you back gently, making you look at him with slight confusion.
“Do you… Maybe you could… sleep at mine, if you want to? Just a thought…” he breathes out, clearly nervous to speak what’s been on his mind.
“I would love to, but only if you’re sure about it.”
“I’m sure. It would be nice to… wake up next to you,” he adds with a shy smile and you notice how he didn’t say waking up next to anyone, he wants you to be there.
“Alright. Why don’t we both just go and shower separately and then I’ll come back to yours?” you offer, giving his hand a squeeze. Harry nods and leaning down he places a chaste kiss to your lips before letting go of your hand, going your separate ways.
After doing your usual nighttime routine you put on a pair of soft pajama pants and a simple shirt before heading back to Harry’s bedroom. The door is slightly open, the lights are still on. You knock on the door before pushing it open carefully. You’ve only been in here a handful of times and it’s strange to come here with the intention of staying.
Harry is standing by his dresser in a pair of sweatpants and a white shirt, his hair is slightly damp from his shower. As his eyes fall on your figure a small smile tugs on his lips before he glances towards the bed.
“Which… which side do you like sleeping on?” he asks and you can’t hold back a chuckle as you walk to the side that’s clearly not used by him usually.
Harry huffs with a smile before going to his side. You put your phone to the nightstand before getting under the covers, making yourself comfortable in Harry’s silky sheets. He sits to the edge of the bed, checks something on his phone before dropping it to his nightstand and he then joins you under the covers.
It’s a tiny bit awkward at first, neither of you really finding your place in such a new situation, so at first you just lie on your sides facing each other. Harry is clearly about to say something, he is just looking for the right words, so you give him all the time he needs.
“I’m glad you’re here,” he softly speaks up. “Not just because… I would be awfully lonely now without Izzy,” he adds with a cheeky chuckle. “I meant it generally. I’m really happy that you’re here.”
“I’m happy to be here too. Wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” you smile at him. Breathing out through his nose he closes his eyes for a few seconds before his green irises meet yours again. Leaning closer he kisses you softly, just another way to tell you the same thing he just said with his words a moment ago. Pulling back he settles his head on the pillow and he pulls you into his arms, making you cuddle to his side similar to the way you fell asleep on the couch earlier.
“Good night, Y/N,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.
“Good night, Harry,” you hum back, nuzzling your face into his shoulder, making yourself comfortable in his strong arms.
Harry grumbles lowly when his phone’s alarm goes off in the morning. He might be off from his daddy duties this week, but he is still the CEO of his company and work is calling his name. Sometime during the night the two of you got tangled up in each other. Unlike last night, now Harry is the one snuggled up to you, his heavy arm lying across your stomach, his legs mingled with yours under the sheets as you gently scratch his scalp with one hand, running the other up and down his arm across your stomach. You’re not gonna lie, waking up in a bed with Harry is far more blissful and satisfying than you imagined. Even early in the morning he has such an aura that sweeps you off your feet, the man was surely crafted by the gods.
“You’re gonna be late,” you hum, eyes still closed when he hits the snooze button and snuggles back to you.
“It’s set to when I have to get Izzy ready. We still have some time,” he mumbles against the fabric of your shirt.
You stay in bed a little longer until it really is time to get up. Harry’s morning form is so soft yet still breathtaking, even with his hair tousled and his puffy eyes, he still looks gorgeous and you find it slightly unfair how little effort the man needs to be this perfect.
Harry heads to take a shower and in the meantime you decide to start making breakfast while the coffee is brewing.
“Oh you shouldn’t have,” Harry breathes out with a thankful smile when he arrives downstairs and sees the almost ready breakfast and the smell of coffee hits his nose.
“I have all the time in the world this week,” you chuckle as you fill a plate with eggs and veggies before you slide it over to him on the kitchen island. You fix a plate for yourself as well and join him on the stool beside him.
“So… are you still up for the date?” Harry asks shyly, glancing over at you.
“Didn’t really change my mind since yesterday,” you chuckle.
“Would you be up to do it today?”
“So, eager, huh?” you tease him, nudging him with your shoulder and he just shyly shrugs, trying to push down his smile. “Today works fine for me. What do you have in mind?”
“I’m not ruining the surprise,” he smirks at you, sipping on his coffee.
“Alright, then just tell me the dress code.”
“Wear that lilac dress you wore to that birthday party the other week.”
You know exactly what dress he is talking about, but it stuns you that he actually remembers what you wore two weeks ago. He only saw you for a few minutes before you left, yet he still remembered the dress.
“Alright,” you smile to yourself before turning back to your breakfast.
Though you have a few extra sessions booked for the week, your Monday stayed empty and without Izzy roaming around the house you have to realize that you can easily get bored without her. You got so used to being with her all day long that now being home on your own is so weird.
You spend the first half of the day lounging at the pool, something you’ve been dying to do, but you were too busy with a certain little girl. Then you have a nice lunch and after reading the book you’ve been putting away for weeks, you realize that you’ve run out of things to do. So you text Trevor if he wants a ride home after school and of course he does, so after fixing yourself up you drive down to his school.
“Hi there, how was your day?” you ask when he sits into the car, throwing his backpack to the backseat before he buckles himself up as you back out of the parking spot.
“Fantastic, as always!” he fake cheers, making you laugh.
“Want to get ice-cream?”
“You know I always want ice-cream,” he snorts smirking at you.
You haven’t met Trevor ever since things become kind of… romantic between you and Harry, and you didn’t want to tell him over the phone, so now is the perfect time to break him the news. When the two of you are sitting on the terrace of your favorite ice-cream place, your paper cup filled with chocolate and strawberry ice-cream while he chose mango and cookie dough, you finally start the conversation.
“So, I have news for you.”
“Oh my God,” he breathes out, closing his eyes for a second. “Are you leaving the country?”
“What? No! Why do you think that?”
“I don’t know, but last time you said you had news for me you moved out from home. Figured it might be something similar,” he shrugs, returning to his ice-cream.
“Well, no, I’m not leaving the country.”
“Okay, then what is it?”
“I’m kind of… dating Harry. You know, my boss.” You have no idea why you felt the need to add the last part when he has already met him, but you feel a bit nervous. Trevor is like your best friend and he had a bad feeling about Keith when you started dating him, but you ignored it. If he has a similar feeling about Harry now, you are definitely considering them this time.
“Oh!” his eyebrows shoot up. “What do you mean kind of?”
“Well, we haven’t had our first date yet, it’s happening tonight, but things have… changed.”
“So you slept with him?”
“No, I haven’t,” you chuckle nervously. “We kissed. A few times and… we talked about where it’s heading and we both think it’s going to turn into something… more serious.”
“That’s great!” he smiles at you and it seems completely genuine. “See, I told you it’s gonna happen sooner or later,” he smirks coyly, before he licks his spoon off.
“You were just drawing random assumptions because of his looks and wealth, Trevor. But it’s not about that.”
“Oh, I know you’re not a gold digger,” he teases you, making you roll your eyes at him. “So your first date is tonight? What are you guys doing?”
“I don’t know, he didn’t tell me,” you shrug with a small smile.
“Mysterious,” Trevor wiggles his eyebrows at you. “So he is finally ready to get back on the dating scene, huh?”
“Um, he is working on it. It’s a little hard for him, but he’s been changing for the better.” “That’s great. I’m happy for you,” he smiles at you. “Really, you deserve it after that asshole.”
“Yeah, I hope it’ll go well,” you smile back at him with a sigh before you return to your ice-cream.
After dropping Trevor off at one of his friends you head back home. For your surprise, Harry’s car is already parked on the driveway with another one that doesn’t belong to him when you pull up and walking in you find him with Niall in the kitchen.
“Oh, hi boys!” you greet them.
“Y/N! You are stunning as always!” Niall beams, pulling you into a tight hug right away.
“Thanks,” you chuckle patting his back. “What are you guys up to?”
They share a look and it tells you right away you are not supposed to know whatever they were talking about so you just nod smiling.
“Alright, got it,” you chuckle.
“How was your day?” Harry asks, hoping to change the subject smoothly.
“Great! Met with Trevor, just dropped him off.”
“Oh, how is he doing?”
“He is fine, struggling a little with math lately, but he is doing great,” you chuckle.
“So you have a brother. Do you happen to have a sister, maybe?” Niall asks with a coy smile and while Harry just rolls his eyes at his friend, you can’t help but laugh.
“Sorry, no,” you tell him the bad news. “But… I have a good friend and I think you’d like her.”
“A friend? Do you have a picture of her?” Niall beams, already excited about it. Pulling your phone out you show him a picture of you and Heather so he can have a good look at her. You actually think that Heather and Niall would be a good match, she might even be the girl Niall would give up his bachelor life finally.
“When are we having a double date?” he simply asks, making you and Harry laugh at the same time.
“I’ll see what I can do for you.” You let the boys finish whatever they were doing before you arrived so you go to your room, unwinding a little before you have to start getting ready for the date. Around five there’s a soft knock on your door and as you call out, Harry pops his head inside.
“Hi,” he smiles nervously as the rest of his body walks into your sight.
“Hi!” you smile back, putting your book to the side.
“I just realized I never told you the time when you should be ready tonight,” he chuckles nervously. “Is six good for you?”
“Yeah, that’s great.”
“Alright. Then… see you soon, I guess,” he smiles nodding before he walks out of your room. You can’t help a small chuckle at how nervous he seems about tonight, as if he wasn’t still sure about your feelings for him, when you’ve made it clearer than daylight.
You get the best kind of jitters while getting ready for the date. It’s like you’re in high school again and your crush has finally asked you out so you want to look your best. Since Harry already suggested you what to wear, you don’t have to spend an hour standing in your closet, trying to find the right choice. For the makeup you go for a little smokey look and you do a loose bun styles for your hair, remembering the words your mother always told you when you were a teenager.
“A woman’s greatest and most secret weapon is her neck. Men go crazy if you show them your neck and they don’t even realize it!”
You spray some perfume on yourself and put on a pair of nude heels before packing your necessities into a purse that matches your outfit. You finish with everything just in time, a soft knock signaling that Harry has returned. Checking yourself one last time in the mirror you open the door and reveal him standing at the door, wearing a pair of fitted purple dress pants with a crispy shirt on, matching your dress perfectly. And the cherry on top is the bouquet of red roses in his hands.
“Hi,” he breathes out with a nervous smile and his gaze travels down your figure, a blush tinting his cheeks.
“Hi!”
“You look… beautiful,” he smiles shyly and your heart is fluttering in your chest. It’s really happening, you are going on a date with Harry!
“Thank you,” you chuckle softly.
“These are for you. I know it’s weird that I’m picking you up from your bedroom and I’m not giving you this at the front door, but…” he chuckles as he hands you the flowers.
“It’s really nice, thank you,” you smile, taking the flowers before moving into the bedroom to put them in a vase quickly. Harry takes just about two steps into the room and stops with his hands hidden in his pockets as he eyes every movement of yours before you finish with the flowers and let him know that you’re ready to do. He holds out his hand and you take it gladly as you head out of the house.
He doesn’t tell you where you’re going, not even when you try to annoy him and bully him into finally hinting something, but you should have known that he wouldn’t break. He has a four year old daughter who is constantly bugging him, he has endless patience.
When he parks down in front of a modern apartment complex you kind of get really confused, because nothing around seems like the location you’d choose for a date.
“Are you gonna kidnap me and keep me hostage in one of the apartments here?” you ask him with narrowed eyes as the two of you head inside, taking the elevator up.
“It’s not kidnapping, you came willingly,” he smirks down at you.
“That I did.”
When you’re at one of the apartments you are really lost about what he had planned and he finally breaks your suffering and tells you what’s gonna happen as he keys the two of you into the apartment.
“This is Niall’s place, he let us use it tonight. My mum always says that cooking together is a good first date, because food brings people together and you can easily get to know each other,” he explains as you walk into the modern, but definitely very manly home. “I didn’t want to do it at home, because we are always there, so… Niall was nice enough to lend us his place for our date.”
You see that there are two full grocery bags on the kitchen counter and the table is already set for two, you wonder if Harry was here earlier, or Niall did the work for him. Either way, it’s such a thoughtful gesture and a perfect first date.
“Where is he tonight?” you ask with a small smile.
“He is visiting his mother, for a change,” Harry chuckles, knowing well you thought he would be out with a woman probably. “He said he won’t be back until later tomorrow so we can even sleep here, but I thought it would be better if we went home.”
“So what are we making?” you ask curiously as you peek into one of the grocery bags.
“We are going to attempt to make gnocchi with some killer tomato sauce. And brownies for dessert,” he adds with a small smile.
“That sounds great, what can I help with?”
“Let me just quickly pack everything out and then we have to peel the potatoes, yeah?”
“Alright,” you nod, your gaze wandering over to the spacious living room. “Can I look around?”
“Sure,” he nods while he is already elbows deep in one of the bags.
Niall’s place looks like it came right off the pages of an interior design magazine, the furnishing is modern and more on the dark color range, but not too much to make it appear depressing. Right next to his huge TV there’s a floor to ceiling bookcase filled with books mostly about music and art and you realize you don’t even know what Niall does for a living. It just never came up between his heavy flirting sessions.
“I never asked, but what does Niall do?” you ask calling out to Harry.
“Oh, he is a freelancer music producer. Tried to offer him a permanent spot at my company, but he prefers his freedom, like with everything else in his life,” he chuckles. “But he is a good one, we used to make music together when we were younger.”
Just as he says that, you spot a picture of the two of them on the shelves and your lips part in a bit of a shock when you realize that Harry used to have long hair. Leaning closer you inspect the photo better and you feel like you’re looking at two entirely different people. Niall’s hair was bleached blonde which is already enough to make him like another version of himself, but Harry is definitely the biggest shocker. He was rocking some loose shirt with the top buttons left undone, his necklace with the cross pendant peeking out and though the photo ends somewhere above his knees, you can tell that he is wearing skinny jeans, something you never thought you would ever see him in.
“You had long hair?” you ask joining him in the kitchen. Harry’s eyes shoot up to him, then he looks in the direction of the living room, a smile tugging on his lips as he probably remembers what photo you must have just seen.
“Uh, yeah. Yes I did, when I was about 21 or 22.”
“I could hardly believe that was you in the picture, with the long locks and the skinny jeans,” you tease him.
“Yeah, I was a lot different then, but after all, it’s been an entire decade since then,” he sniggles.
“Why did you cut it?”
“Um, I was pretty new in the business back then and had a few assholes telling me that it’s not too masculine and all that. It was a time when I cared more about others’ opinion than I should have so I kind of gave in and cut it.”
“I’m sorry they ruined it for you. But I’m glad you don’t care about others that much now,” you smile at him softly. Harry’s eyes flicker down to his painted nails and ring-clad fingers and you just know what he is about to ask before he even speaks up.
“Does it… bother you? That I paint my nails and stuff?”
“No,” you shake your head confidently. “Not at all. I mean, I never saw you without them, but at this point I think it wouldn’t even feel right,” you add with a small laugh that brings Harry’s smile back as well. Stepping closer you kiss his shoulder softly before turning your focus on the food in front of you. “So, let’s peel these bad boys!”
It’s the first time you and Harry actually work together in the kitchen for more than just five minutes. He is always in control at home, taking over everything with Izzy and you know it’s a good bonding time for them, so you never even tried to push your way into it without their invitation. But now the bonding is all about you and him and so far you’ve been a great team. The cutest thing is that he brought you matching aprons to protect your clothes and you look like you are in some cooking show for sure.
You keep asking questions from each other while working on the food, Harry asks you some more about your childhood and teenage years and he shares stories from college where he had this friend group of five. Niall was part of the group as well and he said he is still in touch with the other boys, but they all do very different things now, the other three are already fathers themselves and live far away, so they don’t get to see each other that much.
You are making the little dumplings while Harry is on duty for cooking them, relentlessly fishing them out of the boiling water once they swim up to the top. When that’s done, Harry starts making the sauce while you take care of the brownies. It all works out well, everything gets done easily and while the dessert is in the oven you start eating what you just created.
“Mm, this sauce is really good!” you hum when you take the first bite.
“It’s my mum’s recipe,” he smiles proudly.
At the beginning of the evening you could tell that he felt nervous, not essentially about being with you, but probably because of the thought of going on a date in general. But as time passed by and he got more and more comfortable in the situation, you could see him loosen up and calm his nerves, so now that you are eating the dinner you made together and drinking a glass of fine wine, talking about anything and everything, you feel like he is actually enjoying something he was probably terrified from before.
When the brownies are done the two of you take advantage of the nice evening weather and Niall’s amazing balcony, moving out to the lounge chairs, munching on the dessert with the skyline of the city in front of you. At one point you start playing a game of would you rather, and after a while you ask each other the most random things, cracking each other up continuously. You don’t even realize and it’s already past ten, you completely talked the evening away, but you don’t regret any of it.
You clean up Niall’s place, leaving it just the way you got it, putting some leftovers into his fridge for him as a thank you for lending you his place before you head out.
Harry keeps a hand on you at all times on the way home, he is either holding your hand over the console, or rests his palm on your thigh above your knee, but either way, he just keeps the physical touch up always. Not that you mind, you are doing kind of the same, enjoying his closeness.
Arriving home you can feel a kind of tension growing, but not a bad kind. You want him. Your desire to go further than just kissing has grown immensely tonight, but you have no idea how he feels about taking it further and you don’t want to push him past his boundaries.
“Want to… sleep with me again?” he shyly asks when you’re going up the stairs.
“Yeah, I would love that,” you smile at him, giving him a quick peck on his cheek.
When you part ways in the hallway he probably expects you to do your night time routine, but you have other plans. Grabbing your polaroid camera you pad your way over to his room, knocking on the door, hoping he is not in the shower yet. When he calls out for you, he is standing at his dresser, the first few buttons of his shirt are already undone, but he is still dressed.
“I just thought that… we could snap a picture as a nice memento of our first date,” you shyly explain to him, holding the camera up.
“Oh, yeah! Okay, how do you... how should we…?” he looks around the room and you step to his dresser, placing the camera to the top of it.
“It’s got a timer,” you explain as you set it up and tell him where to stand so you can check if he is in the frame. When it’s all set, you glance back at him. “Ready?”
“Yeah,” he nods shyly. You push the button and step back to him. “What should we…” he starts, but you already know what you want the picture to be like.
Cupping his face in your hands you pull him down and kiss him sweetly, for the first time tonight. You’ve noticed he hasn’t tried to kiss you all night, being a gentleman, but you’ve been craving it since he showed up at your door with the roses.
He hesitates for a moment, but eventually curls his arms around you, kissing you back softly. The timer goes off and the flash indicates that the photo has been taken. Pulling back you smile at him before taking the photo from the camera, setting it to the side to develop. Harry steps behind you, his arms coming to curl around your waist and you turn in his hold to face him.
“Hi,” you smile at him giddily. “Thanks for today.”
“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” he answers softly, making your heart flutter. You press your lips at his, kissing him hard and passionate, like you wanted all evening. He is quick to return the kiss with just as much passion as you put into it, his hands finding your waist as he slowly pulls you with him until the back of his legs hit the bed. He sits down and pulls you with him so you sit on his lap straddling him, never breaking the kiss as you settle in his arms, his hands roaming up and down your back.
Your kisses move from his delicious lips to his chiseled jawline and down his neck, your fingers working on the buttons of his dress shirt. You want him, you need him, he is all you can think about and the taste of his skin on your tongue is making you lose your mind.
His hands move up your thighs right to your bum, giving it a good squeeze, making you moan against the crook of his neck.
“Fuck,” he growls, throwing the two of you to the bed, getting on top of you before his lips attack yours, kissing you with a demand heatedly. His lips move smoothly against yours, devouring you with every suck and lick, making you dizzy in the head with such little effort.
He starts kissing down your neck, through your collarbone and whatever is showing in your dress on your chest. Your fingers lace through his messy curls, keeping him close to you as you try to control your moans and gasps. His fingers hook under the thin straps of your dress and he is about to pull them down when he stops, breathing heavily against your skin.
Harry lifts his head, his eyes meeting yours as he is panting through his parted lips and you cup his cheeks in your hands.
“Hey, what’s wrong? Talk to me,” you tell him softly, knowing well his mind is probably racing right now.
“I just…” he starts quietly. “I haven’t been with anyone since… Maggie,” he admits in a whisper and your gaze softens on him.
“And I haven’t been with anyone since Keith,” you admit truthfully. “We don’t have to do anything tonight. I’m fine with just sleeping if that’s all you want to do.”
“No, I want to… I want to do things, I just… I’m not used to it, I guess,” he breathes out as you run your fingers through his hair.
“It’s okay. We can take it slow. Whatever you feel comfortable with,” you assure him pecking his lips softly.
“Is it… Is it okay if we just… touch?” He is clearly feeling a bit embarrassed to ask, but you will not make him feel bad for asking for whatever he wants. Pulling him down for another kiss you smile up at him.
“Touching is perfect. It’s all up to you,” you tell him and see the gratitude in his eyes right away.
Removing yourself off of his lap you climb back on the bed, pulling him with you until he is holding himself up above you. Your eyes meet for a second again before leaning down he kisses you slowly, taking his time with you. He is holding himself up on one arm while his other hand finds your hip, gently squeezing it when his tongue slides into your mouth through the kiss. Your hands move down his chest and you start unbuttoning his shirt until it falls open and he shimmies it off with a soft chuckle.
“Let’s get rid of the dress too,” you breathe out, reaching down for the hem of your dress, pulling it up until it’s off, leaving you in only your underwear. You’re wearing a matching set with a strapless bra and as you lie back on the bed Harry’s eyes basically devour you, his gaze running up and down your body several times.
“You’re so beautiful, Y/N,” he breathes out before leaning down and kissing you again, his hand cupping your side before wandering over to your stomach and up to your chest. He runs his hand over your chest, gently squeezing it, making you moan into the kiss.
“And you’re wearing too much clothes,” you grin as you reach down and start undoing his purple pants you ogled him quite often tonight. Harry chuckles as he holds himself up for you to work the button and the zipper on his pants before he takes over the task and gets rid of them himself, leaving him in only his boxer briefs and you have to hold yourself back from gasping when you see the growing bulge between his legs.
You don’t get to eye him for too long, because he is back to kissing you, his body pressing up against yours as you let your hands roam his strong back, his skin burning under your touch. His lips travel down the line of your neck to your chest and his hand snakes behind your back, but he stops before he could do anything with the clasp of your bra. Glancing up at you he gives you a questioning glare, asking for your permission.
“You can take it off,” you softly tell him nodding. His fingers are quick to undo it and a moment later you’re lying with a bare chest underneath him. His hand moves to your chest again and he kneads your breast again, this time with nothing between your skin and his palm. You whimper under his touch, you’ve been so starved to be touched this way and now that it’s happening, it’s hard to control yourself, but Harry doesn’t seem to mind seeing you react to what he is doing.
His lips return to your mouth and while he kisses you with so much passion, he slowly lays himself down next to you, so you’re facing each other sideways on the bed. He pulls you closer to him until you’re flushed against his hard chest and while your hand roams around his shoulders and back, his palm slides down your spine, over your waist until he calms bum, pushing you even closer to him. His clothed erection presses against your thigh and you can’t help but whimper his name at the feeling.
His kisses slow down and his touch loosens on you until he pulls back, seemingly just for air, but you can tell his head is starting to race again, spiraling thoughts taking over his mind.
“Do you want me to take over control?” you softly ask him, pushing his unruly curls out of his forehead. His gaze softens and he nods shortly with gratefulness lacing through his look.
He watches you intently as you push yourself up into a sitting position, he rolls to his back and keeps his gaze on you as you hook your fingers into your panties, getting rid of them before doing the same for him with his boxers. He lifts his hips up as you pull down the elastic material, revealing his hard cock to your greedy eyes. You want nothing more than to taste him, but he said he just wants to touch so you don’t try to overstep his limits, leaving this desire of yours to another time. Instead, you lean down, capturing his lips in a sweet, reassuring kiss that everything is going fine to calm his nerves as much as you can, while you place your palm to his lower stomach, moving down slowly until you find his hard cock, wrapping your hand around his length and giving it a few gentle stroke.
“Fuck,” he breathes out against your parted lips and you can’t push a smile down.
You kiss his lips, his cheeks, his jawline, everywhere around his face while you keep pumping him, spreading some of his precum down his length to help your hand move smoother. Your actions awaken something in him, he grabs your face in both his hands, kissing you hard before he pushes you to your back, becoming the one on top. He parts your legs with pushing a knee between your thighs and while you keep up with your motions, he gets down to action as well. One of his large palms runs down your abdomen, stroking your lower belly gently before it moves to your inner thigh, spreading you even more for him before you feel his touch on your heated and dripping wet core. First, he just teasingly runs two fingers through your folds, testing how wet you are and when he realizes that you are more than ready to whatever he has planned, he moves his thumb to your sensitive clit, drawing circles with the pad of his finger, sending a wave of pleasure up your spine immediately.
“Harry!” you moan his name, running your thumb over the head of his cock that makes him gasp and stop his motions for a moment before he returns to pleasuring you.
He buckles his hips into your touch while his fingers move down from your clit until he is teasing your entrance, just circling around it but not pushing into you. Rolling your hips you signal him that you want the teasing to end and he luckily gets the hint, slowly sliding two fingers inside you, curling them gently and it makes your eyes roll back immediately. He rests his forehead on your shoulder as he starts moving his fingers in and out of you while you try your best to keep up your pumping motion as well, moving your other hand to his balls to give him some of that extra pleasure and he seems to be liking what you’re doing, because your name keeps falling from his lips as keeps fingering you, curling his digits just the right way inside you from time to time.
“Fuck, Y/N, I won’t last long,” he pants, his lips brushing against your neck before he kisses the soft skin above your collarbone.
“It’s alright. Just want you to feel good, H,” you assure him, though you’re getting closer to your release as well.
“Are you close?” he asks out of breath, still holding himself up above you, leaning onto his other arm next to your head.
“Yeah, don’t stop,” you nod, turning your head so your lips could meet for a kiss again.
You can tell he is trying hard to hold himself back, to stretch it out as long as he can. A torturous look tugs on his face and you kiss his temple, wanting nothing more than to see him finally reach the peak.
“Let go, H. It’s alright,” you whisper against his skin and he whines at your words before you feel his cock jerk in your hand and he cums under your touch.
You keep stroking him as he rides his high, gasping and panting your name while he spills his semen onto your naked stomach. His fingers stopped moving inside you as he found his relief, but as soon as you feel him recovering from his orgasm, he goes right back to where he left it, desperately wanting to pleasure you as well.
“Harry!” you moan when he hits a specific spot inside you, tingling your nerves just right, your hands come to clasp onto his broad shoulders.
“Cum for me, babe. Let me see you feel good,” he whispers before his lips occupy your mouth again, kissing you with so much passion and vigor, your senses are starting to overload.
“Fuck, I’m gonna cum!” you gasp feeling your toes curl and Harry picks his pace up, his thumb coming in contact with your clit as he tries to make you reach your high.
And then it finally happens. You stop breathing for a moment, the intensity of it washing over your whole body. It’s been so long since you felt this good with anyone, and just the thought of doing this with Harry probably adds a lot to the equation.
He slows his fingers down, but makes sure to curl them inside you every time he pumps them in, and you repeat his name over and over again until you finally catch your breath. Your gaze meets his, and you see a happy and satisfied shine in his green irises as he leans down and kisses you sweetly, pulling his fingers out of you gently.
“M’gonna get a towel,” he murmurs, pecking your lips one last time before he gets up from the bed and walks into the bathroom while you lie on his bed, totally gone and worn out from your orgasm. Harry comes back with a damp washcloth and cleans up the mess he made on you before gently moving to between your legs, taking such good care of you. He drops the cloth to the floor, not wanting to leave the bed again as he pulls the covers over your bodies, pulling you into his arms.
“How are you feeling?” you softly ask, pecking his toned chest.
“I’m good.”
Lifting your head you search for his eyes, wanting to make sure he didn’t regret any of it, but he seems calm and rested for a change. Smiling up at him you push yourself up a little so you can connect your lips before you snuggle back to his side and let yourself slowly drift off to sleep, listening to his steady heartbeat under your face.
Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!
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maybe i do
--”even at a young age, he knew he wouldn’t be able to choose who he married, but that didn’t stop him from hoping that one day, maybe, you would at least be an option.so imagine his excitement when you were. and then imagine his pain when you told him you wished you were anything but.”
pairing: lee know x reader
genre: angst, fluff, a smut scene
warnings: none
word count: 16.3k
a/n: arraigned marriage with minho was requested, as was breeding/pregnancy kink with him :) I didn’t make the pregnancy kink a big part bc the smut scene is small but i hope you like it anyway, anon!! I can always write a separate fic, too. there’s never too many minho fics <3
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eighteen. that’s when you were expected to choose a partner. you’d just turned of age, and as an adult, you were now supposed to be getting ready to take the throne. with a partner, of course.
a very specific partner, specific to the point that all choice given to you to make you feel like you were in control meant absolutely nothing.
you needed to find a man, first of all. a single man, one that wasn’t already set to be married. he had to have power, at least as much or more power than you had. he needed to have wealth. you needed to find yourself a handsome, wealthy prince from one of your neighboring kingdoms, and your parents had to like him. as much as your parents said you were in full control of choosing your suitor, you knew you were not the one making the calls. not a single one of them.
there was only one person who matched all of these criteria. there was only one boy you whose name would be on your list of potential suitors and your parents knew it just as well as you did.
you could try just simply not writing lee minhos name down, not selecting a husband at all, but it would be futile. eventually, if you hadn’t selected a worthy candidate to marry, one would be decided for you.
without a doubt, minho would be the one selected, whether you wrote it down or your parents signed his name for you.
you didn’t have anything against minho specifically. he was no more intolerable than any of the other royal children you’d met. if anything, he was actually easier to be around. it’s just that you were expected to be fond of him.
you were ordered by your parents to love him, and that in itself made you want to despise him.
along with your side of the selection, minho also had to choose you. if he didn’t, you would just have to wait until someone else came along. it wasn’t just you looking for a partner, he was in search as well. the difference was that he had been in search for nearly a year and he had willingly selected you.
minho wasn’t the first in line to be king of his home kingdom, his oldest brother was. he was already married and set to be crowned in the coming months. instead, if minho ever wanted to be a king, he needed to find a woman to marry who was set to become queen.
luckily for him, you were the oldest daughter in a family that had no sons.
as the eldest sibling in a family of no boys, you were in line to lead. but according to the rules, you couldn’t lead without a man to stand beside.
in all logic, minho had to choose you just as much as you needed to choose him. of course, if both of you resented each other, the wedding could be held off until you resolved the conflict. or even cancelled. you might be given a few more years of freedom before another man who fits your parents wants walks into their life or ages old enough to marry.
much to your dismay, however, minho did choose you. even before it was brought to his attention that he was your only option, that you would remain single for an unknown amount of time unless he married you, minho chose you. the second he noticed your name on the list of possible brides, which was much longer than your list of possible husbands, he had his mind set on you.
and after finding out that you had no one to choose but him, minho was sure he was going to get what he wanted.
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you clenched your jaw and took your place at the table, glancing at the seat beside you that had been saved for minho.
“we want you two to get to know each other more before the wedding,” your mother said, “and he’s such a sweet boy.”
“i haven’t even chosen him as my fiancé yet, mom.”
she sent you an apologetic smile, both of you knew it didn’t matter what you chose.
you sat biting your lip and playing with the frills on your dress for quite some time before minho and his parents entered the room, escorted by four of the palace guards.
he looked different than when you had last seen him. taller. it had only been a year or so, but you could clearly see changes. his jaw line was more defined and he had finally learned how to tie a tie so it wasn’t crooked. his eyes, though. even from across the room, you could see that his eyes were the same.
you smiled and sent a small wave towards one of the guards as they turned to leave. minho must have thought you were waving at him, and he waved back, a huge smile plastered on his pretty lips.
you were aware that he had already put your name down as his official choice of brides, practically robbing you of any chance you had of not being forced into marriage, and you knew he was probably equally aware that you had yet to write down his name, even though it was the only one you had.
you held back a laugh at minho waving at you, not having the heart to tell him you were waving to felix and not him as he made his way around the table and to you. you let yourself smile though. no matter how much you wanted him to hate you as much as you hated the idea of marrying him, you couldn’t be downright rude. not when the parents were watching, at least.
you stood to greet him, sending your now-forced smile in his direction. you went to shake his hand, but instead, he pulled you into a tight hug. it was short, so short that you didn’t have the time to return the hug, not that you would have wanted to.
you sat back down and looked up to greet his parents sitting across from the two of you on your big table. your own parents were sat on the ends of the table, your father to your left and mother to your right. neither your nor minhos siblings were present.
there was no time for conversation before the cook was bringing out the food. it was nothing fancy, per your request. he brought all of the food out at once, minus the desert, instead of in different courses.
you half expected minho to say something about the way the meal was brought out in a way that wasn’t considered the most elegant, but he didn’t. instead, his eyes went wide as he spotted the roasted chicken set down in the middle of the table.
his mother observed his behavior and laughed, “y/n, how did you know minho’s favorite food? i don’t remember sending a letter containing his favorites.”
you frowned slightly, “i didn’t, i just chose my favorite.”
at your words, your mothers shared a glance, one that said, “they’re perfect for each other.”
your father was the next to speak, “minho, why don’t you cut the chicken for us.”
once again you anticipated some sort of reaction out of the boy. he had been asked to cut the chicken when there were waiters standing all around that could most likely do it much neater than he could. it was another thing you had specifically requested to happen in order to judge his reaction. but again, to your surprise, he smiled, stood up, and began to cut even strips off of it, passing them out around the table.
he turned to you, “how much do you want?”
you ignored the softness in his voice, one that you could see yourself growing fond of if you didn’t resent the idea of loving him so much already.
“i can get my own.”
he didn’t even flinch at your response, chuckling as he cut a piece off of the bird and guided it to your plate. you had to keep yourself from pouting as you looked down at it. he’d given you just as much as you wanted.
he was making it very difficult to keep a bitter attitude towards him when he was doing everything right. how were you supposed to convince your parents he would be a terrible husband when acted like the perfect one?
after serving himself, minho reclaimed his seat beside you. you served yourself to the rest of the food as it was passed around, handing the bowls to minho when you were finished. you took notice of the way he chose food. he took a little of everything, as if he wanted to taste all of the foods you had requested to be made for his visit. you asked him about it.
“trying everything, minho?”
you dropped his formality. you should have predicted that he would take it as a sign that you were comfortable with him rather than a petty disrespect in the way you’d meant.
he nodded, sending a soft smile towards you, “i assume your chose all your favorites, princess, so i want to try them all.”
you would have blushed if someone you were fond of said it, but you weren’t blushing. no, the heat in your face was just there because the room was warm from all of the bodies and hot food.
one of the waiters came around with a bottle of wine and some glasses, offering one to everyone at the table. of course, everyone accepted, it was impolite not to, but you couldn’t help but notice that minho didn’t touch his glass as often as the rest of you.
by the time you were smiling up at the waiter as he poured you a second glass, minho still had yet to finish even half of his first.
you ate in casual conversation until all of you had your fill. the table was slowly cleared and the meals were replaced with a small array of sweets.
minho nudged you, pointing at one of the trays.
“what’s this?”
you were caught off guard by his voice. it was soft, timid, almost like he was embarrassed that he didn’t know what the dessert was.
“pumpkin bars.”
he nodded, “are they your favorite?”
you shrugged, shaking your head, “kinda. they’re not my favorite to eat, but i love baking them.”
his eyes widened, “you made these?”
you shook your head again, a small laugh leaving your lips. as much as you tried to stay short and serious with him, you couldn’t.
“no, but i know how.”
he paused for a moment as his eyes scanned the table before he turned to you once more, “can you teach me?”
your brows furrowed, “to make pumpkin bars?”
he nodded.
never mind. you definitely could be short with him.
what was he playing at? why was he behaving exactly in the way you’d want him to in every obstacle you threw at him? he couldn’t actually be that good. first, he wasn’t offset by the untraditionally casual meal or being asked to serve the main dish himself, and now he was showing interest in something you liked to do. something that was considered low level, something that a princess should never have to do. and now he was asking if you would show him how?
no, he had to be faking. any walls that had been broken down by his timid voice and him making you laugh were thrown back up.
“you don’t want to bake.”
it was his turn to frown.
he reached out to stop your arm as you went to grab a slice of pie.
“what do you mean? yes i do.”
you pulled your wrist from his grip, speaking lowly so only he would hear.
“well i don’t want to teach you.”
you missed the expression that crossed his face as you reached across the table to grab the dessert you wanted.
he didn’t say anything more. he just reached for the pie spatula as you went to set it down. his fingers grazed yours as he took the tool from your hand and you were violently aware of it, of how his fingers against your skin seemed to send a shock through your body.
he set a piece on his plate and took a bite, glancing at you. you hadn’t even registered that you had been watching him until he did.
“how is it?”
he nodded in approval, “it’s good. do you know how to make pies, too?”
“yes. i can make most every dessert our cooks can.”
he held your gaze as he smiled at you.
you frowned, averting your eyes from his and back to your plate, “what?”
“nothing.” he began, “i just think it’s interesting that you’re so into baking now. last time we spoke you were crazy about the gardens.”
you shrugged, “who says i can’t love both?”
there was a pause before, to your surprise, you kept the conversation going.
“do you still practice archery?”
he nodded, swallowing a bite of his pie before responding.
“i can out shoot almost all of our archers.”
you raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing at your lips, “who says they’re not letting you win?”
he playfully shoved you and you laughed.
“fine, then you go against me.”
you shook your head, “anyone could beat me in archery.”
he seemed to think for a moment before softly nudging you, “i could give you some tips?”
you almost found yourself accepting his offer before you caught yourself. you were not supposed to be enjoying his company.
“i don’t need your help. if i wanted to learn i would have one of my guards teach me.”
the way his expression fell made something in your chest ache and you hoped his parents hadn’t heard the remark. you felt bad for a moment, it wasn’t his fault that you were being forced to marry him.
then a thought crossed your mind- it kind of was.
he played by their rules and pretended to be excited to marry you, but that’s not what he wanted. he knew the perks that came along with marrying you. it wasn’t you he was excited for, it was the power and status that came along with marrying you. how could he be excited to marry you when he barely knew you? he couldn’t. all he wanted was to be king, and you gave him that option. he didn’t try to fight it. maybe if he fought it like you did, you wouldn’t be forced into it. or at least not so soon.
the fact that his cooperation was only securing your unwanted future was enough to wipe that sting from your chest.
you finished the rest of your dessert in silence, listening in on your parents conversations and trying not to scream at every mention of the upcoming wedding you didn’t want to have.
“has he picked out a ring yet?”
“no,” his mother responded, “he wanted to get to know her better first. he wants it to be perfect.”
you finished your food and pushed the plate away from you, letting the waiters know they could collect it. all of the adults were already done eating. minho finished soon after, having taken longer as he savored every bite. this left the table without food and full of conversation.
minho only spoke again when your mother addressed him.
“is there a specific type of flower you want at the ceremony?”
he spoke softly, kindly. you could see exactly why your mother loved him so much. even without him being the only choice, he probably would have been her first choice for you.
“yes. i love lilies.”
you took a deep breath to keep yourself from blowing up, it couldn’t be a coincidence that he kept having the same favorites as you. someone told him so he could better bond with you.
your mom knew how badly you didn’t want this wedding to happen, she probably send his family a letter of ways to win your favor.
“it would be the perfect time to have the ceremony outside,” minho’s mother gushed, “the green suits them both.”
your dad laughed, “every color suits our y/n.”
“what color were you thinking, dear?” your mother turned to you.
your eyes shot to her. you were about to snap that you didn’t care about colors because you hoped there would be no wedding to coordinate colors to, but minhos parents were in the room. you couldn’t risk upsetting them and throwing off the good relationship your kingdoms had simply because you didn’t want to marry their son.
cutting off the marriage would be one thing. if it was mutual, it wouldn’t harm any relationships between the kingdoms. it would just stall your transition to power until you were forced against another possible husband. insulting him in front of his parents, however, might.
instead, you opted to look over at minho and pull a false smile onto your features.
“i think purple would suit him well.”
his parents didn’t catch the falseness of your cheerful tone or the way the smile on your lips was obviously forced, but minho did.
“oh, you’re so right!”
you asked one of the servants for the time and stood up.
“mom, i need to water my plants. may i?”
she nodded gesturing to the boy beside you, “take minho with you.”
you nodded, turning to leave the room without waiting for him. you heard your mother mutter something about your own little garden that you refused to let the staff tend for instead of doing it yourself.
minho caught up as you were partly down the hallway.
“y/n, is something wrong?”
you stopped, nearly causing him to crash into you.
“is something wrong? minho, this whole thing is wrong.”
he frowned, following again as you made your way to the garden entrance, “what do you mean?”
you opened the door to the garden a little harsher than you probably needed to and began filling a watering jug, “people should be able to fall in love before marriage.”
he shrugged, “there’s plenty of time for you to fall in love with me before the ceremony.”
you sent a glare towards him, “i want to choose who i love, minho.”
“then choose me.”
you shook your head, choosing not to respond. he followed you across the garden and to a small, fenced off patch that he assumed to be your personal garden.
you could feel his eyes on you as you went around and checked the soil around each plant before watering the ones that needed it. he wasn’t saying anything, he was just watching you. you let him stand in silence.
he followed you back to the entrance where you sat your watering can down and to a small bench where he took his seat beside you.
you put some distance between the two of you when he sat down right next to you and he noticed, just as he had noticed every other less than loving way you’d reacted to each of his attempts to show affection.
his chest tightened, why did you hate him so much? he thought you two were on good terms. the last time you saw each other, you laughed and joked with him. what was different now? was the idea of marrying him really that bad?
maybe you were just nervous.
people handle nerves differently, he reminded himself, maybe yours just made you snappy. it wasn’t anything to worry about. plenty of people had second thoughts before their weddings. you just had to get used to him was all, since you hadn’t seen each other in so long. then you would go back to joking with him and your he happy to have him as your husband.
he was shaken out of his thoughts by your voice.
“you don’t drink much?” you were referring to the glass of wine he had barely finished during dinner.
he shook his head, “it makes my mind foggy.”
you chuckled. he liked the sound. somehow, it was sweeter knowing that it was because of him.
“isn’t that what alcohol is supposed to do?”
he smiled, “i guess. but i wanted to be able to see you clearly.”
something akin to butterflies woke up inside your stomach. you ignored them as you stood abruptly, heading immediately for the door. he followed you out of the garden and back to the dining room where your families were seated. they turned as you stepped through the door.
“mother, it’s getting late and they have a long ride home.”
minho said nothing, standing at your side like it’s where he belonged, once again too close for comfort.
his parents agreed, standing along with your parents and thanking them for having them over. his mother hugged you goodbye at the front door before stepping into a carriage with her husband and son.
you were thankful that minho hadn’t tried to hug you goodbye. or much worse, kiss you.
he spent the carriage ride home wishing he had.
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it was only a matter of days before his family was visiting again. since minho would be living in your castle with you, your parents decided it was best to have him visit you again rather than you go to his kingdom.
“y/n, the lees will be here soon, get dressed!”
“i am dressed.”
“then get out here!”
you groaned and chan laughed beside you.
“stop laughing at my pain.” you scolded him, “i’ll have you fired from the guard.”
he laughed again, “you would never. who would protect you then?”
you grumbled as you straightened your dress and opened the door, “felix. woojin. seungmin. literally any of the other guards.”
he pouted, coming to stand next to you as you walked down the hallway and to the front where you would be greeting minho.
he was going to complain, but you cut him off when you saw minho and his family standing near the doorway.
“go join the others.” you told chan, “but be on watch. you might need to save minho from me if he acts like he was last time.”
chan laughed, heading to stand with the rest of the guards.
minho noticed the friendly interaction and smiled. he liked how you were always so nice to the servants. he noticed it during the meal too, when you smiled and joked with the waiter.
“sorry to keep you waiting.” you bowed politely to his parents.
you turned to minho, “hello.”
a big smile spread across his features, “hi again, my love.”
he had taken a risk with those being the first words out of his mouth. he thought that maybe seeing him again and time to adjust had gotten you used to the idea of him. he thought maybe your attitude would have changed towards him.
he was wrong. although you couldn’t make a point of showing it in front of his parents, he could see by the slight change in your eyes at the choice of the name that he was definitely wrong.
“would you kids leave the adults to talk for a while?” your mother spoke.
she placed one hand on your shoulder and the other on minho’s, “you can go wherever you’d like, just stay clear of your bedroom.”
your face flushed red and glared at your mom as minhos parents laughed. was she trying to embarrass you? did she think you’d laugh at the joke? it wasn’t funny.
knowing you wouldn’t last long without blowing up with teasing like that, you took a hold of minho’s hand and drug him away from your parents. you allowed him to walk beside you this time instead of rushing to be in front of him, but you dropped his hand practically as soon as you’d taken it.
he’d assumed the garden was your destination, so when you walked past the doorway to the giant greenhouse, he spoke up.
“where are we going?”
“i don’t know yet.”
you ended up at the base of a staircase that lead to the roof of the castle. without questioning you, he followed you up the stairs and to the open roof. you were immediately met with a burst of cold air, but the longer you stood in the wind, the easier it became to handle.
you followed minho as he made his way across the roof and towards the edge, throwing his legs over and sitting with them dangling down as he took in the view.
he probably expected to go sit with him, so you did. that in no way meant you were going to begin complying with everything, it just meant that you were choosing to be civil in that moment.
he noticed as you glanced back at the door you’d entered the roof from.
“what is it?”
“my mother must have told my guards not to follow us.”
he shrugged, “why would you need guards when you’re with me?”
you huffed, “in case i decide to bite your head off.”
he laughed at the remark, and even though you hadn’t intended it as a joke, you laughed along with him. something about his laugh made it impossible to sit there with a scowl on your face.
“tell me what’s so bad about me, then.”
a teasing grin spread across your face as you looked at him, “god, where do i start...”
he gestured for you to continue, but your mind ran blank. what exactly was so bad about him? the majority of your issues weren’t with him in specific.
then one thing popped into your mind like a big red flag.
“you’re forcing me into marriage.”
he frowned, “i don’t think so, not really. if i refused to marry you, you would simply wait another year or two as a princess until your parents were able to find another prince for you.” he paused, “in some ways, i actually think i’m saving you.”
“saving me?” you scoffed out.
“yes. from some creep you might be forced to marry instead of me if i decline as harshly as you are.”
“who says you’re not a creep, lee minho?”
his face morphed into faux offense, “my mother says i’m quite the gentleman, thank you very much.”
you let out a small chuckle before responding. he did have a point, you were going to be forced into a marriage eventually, whether it be this one or not. at least you knew him. was a couple extra years of freedom worth marrying someone you didn’t know at all? or would it be wisest to settle for minho?
either way, you still didn’t understand why you needed a man at all to lead.
“why can’t i just lead alone? i don’t need a king.”
“there’s two thrones for a reason.”
he saw the confusion across your face and continued.
“two leaders is safer than one. it requires compromise and thought, not just one person making the choices according to their opinion only.”
you nodded, and you hated how much his explanation of everything was making sense.
“it’s the same reason they make a king marry before taking the throne if they can help it.”
there was a short pause before he spoke again, “i mean, technically, if both of your parents died right now, there would be no option other than to send you to the throne alone. and as the queen, no one could tell you to get married. but unless you want to assassinate your parents,” he brought his hand to rest on top of yours, “you’re stuck with me.”
ignoring the searing heat of his skin touching yours, you narrowed your eyes up at him as you spoke.
“you make it tempting.”
he laughed again, and this time you had intended for it to be humorous.
it was cleared now why things were the way they were. it would have been so much easier if your parents took a second to explain it in the way minho had. he was very good with explaining things, a talent a good king needs to have.
maybe he wouldn’t be so bad to lead with.
still, you didn’t resent the situation any less than you had before understanding it.
you turned from the view of the mountains to find minho already staring back at you. it wasn’t until you noticed the way the sun framed his face that you noticed how quickly the sun had been setting, had you really been outside with him that long?
you traced the lines of his face with your eyes, admiring the way the sun sat on his skin as if it was made for the purpose.
you frowned in confusion as the shapes across his face began to grow, and before you could register it, his lips were only moments away from yours. you reacted quickly, thankful that he had paused to give you the option to do so.
he didn’t seem surprised as the palms of your hands connected to his chest, pushing him away from you.
you stood from the edge, dusting off your dress and motioning to the door.
“i’m not supposed to be outside at dark without my guards.”
you knew that that didn’t matter, your parents trusted minho to keep you safe, that’s the whole reason they didn’t feel the need to send guards with you in the first place. you figured he probably knew that too, but he didn’t comment on it. instead, he nodded, following you to the staircase and opening the door for you, walking with you around the castle as you looked for your parents.
you found them in the first place you looked, the lounge. you waited for a pause in their conversation before making yourself known.
“it’s getting dark, shall i ask for the carriage?”
your mother sent you a worried smile as your dad spoke.
“sweetheart, they’re staying the night. we’ll have a carriage sent to take king and queen lee home in the morning.
you frowned, glancing at minho. he shrugged.
“the king and queen? what about minho?”
“he’ll be living here from now on. he might as well get used to his new home.”
your face fell.
“what about my things?” minho questioned. he seemed much more calm about the news than you, but he didn’t seem to know any more about the situation.
his mother waved the question off, “i sent for some carriages with your things as soon as we made the decision for you to remain here. they’ve already arrived and are waiting to be unpacked.”
“where are they?” he questioned.
his mother laughed like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“your bedroom.”
“where is that?”
your dad cut in, “y/n can show you.”
that’s when it hit you- his bedroom was your bedroom. that’s why your mother had told you to stay clear of it. she had anticipated the conversation about minho staying and wanted the area to be clear if they chose to move his things in. your mother hadn’t meant it as a joke at all, she said it as an order.
trying to hide your frustration, you grabbed minho’s hand and turned to leave.
“we’ll start to unpack now!”
you ignored both your and his parents calls as you dragged him down the hallways and to your bedroom.
the first thing you noticed was that some of your personal items were being carried out of the door as you watched. things that made your bedroom yours. stacks of books you loved to read and even piles of papers containing words of your own were being handled by random personnel. not even your own guards, staff you had never met was handling your personal things. it would be one thing if it was chan or one of your friends moving things out, but it wasn’t. you hadn’t even seen chan or the rest of your guard since you greeted minho when he arrived.
their soul job was to protect you, and they had been relieved of duty while you were with minho, so why couldn’t they have been the ones to handle your things? it would still have upset you, obviously, but it would have been far less intrusive to have people you know and trust doing it.
you felt tears brimming in your eyes. your parents knew how much you valued privacy, and yet they let people you’d never even seen on the property handle everything you valued.
minho’s eyes were just as attached to the scene ahead of you until he heard a soft whimper leave your lips. immediately, he had his arms around you and your face buried in his chest.
you wanted to pull away, to shove him and curse at him for coming into your life like this, but instead, you gripped the fabric of his button up shirt and let him hold you close.
“i’m so sorry,” he whispered into your hair, “i didn’t know.”
and then he did something you would never have expected.
“excuse me!” he called, his authoritative voice echoing down the hallway, “you can stop now. put whatever is in your hands down and leave.”
the movers hesitated, not knowing whether or not to follow his commands yet, but they ended up obeying. he stopped one of the men as he moved to walk past the two of you, you still secure and crying into his chest.
“where did you put the things you moved?”
the worker gestured to the things in the hall outside your bedroom, “everything we moved is in this hallway, your royal highness.”
“and my things?”
“waiting for you further down the hall.”
he nodded and let the man leave before slowly pulling you off of him. he felt a squeeze in his heart as you looked up at him with red, tear filled eyes.
he led you into your room, “let’s get you to your bed.”
you let out a small sob at his words, “that’s not my bed.”
he was confused for a moment before it registered in his mind. they must have switched out your old bed in favor of a larger one to suit the both of you, even though the one you had before would have no doubt done the job fine. you’d probably had a queen at the smallest.
the longer minho held you, the less you wanted to push him away and blame him for everything that was happening.
he walked you over to the bed and sat you down, taking a seat beside you so you could remain attached to him.
he knew that it wasn’t him you found comfort in, but rather just a warm body to hug. still, having you so close to him felt so right, he couldn’t bring himself to care. it felt like you were finally responding to him like a woman should to her fiancé. you were letting him take care of you.
truth be told, if he could have scooped you up in his arms the day he first saw you after learning you were to be his wife a few days prior, he would have, and he never would have let go.
when he saw your name on the piece of paper handed to him, he didn’t even read the rest. even before opening the letter, your name had popped into his mind. he’d always had a childish crush on you. even at a young age, he knew he wouldn’t be able to choose who he married, but that didn’t stop him from hoping that one day, maybe, you would at least be an option.
so imagine his excitement when you were. and then imagine his pain when you told him you wished you were anything but.
as he moved you up the bed and snuggled himself in beside you before pulling the covers up to keep you warm, he wondered if maybe tonight would change that.
maybe you would realize that you liked the feeling of being in his arms, of having him hold you close. as your sniffles became softer and eventually stopped, he wondered if you’d realize that falling asleep next to him was something you could get used to.
because oh goodness, after falling asleep with you in his arms, even though the both of you were still in uncomfortable cloths and had fallen asleep upset, he didn’t ever want to go to bed without you again.
you were woken up only a little while after falling asleep to the sound of soft knocking on your door. minho stirred beside you and you both sat up to see who it was.
both of your mothers were standing in the doorway with adoration in their eyes at the sight in front of them.
“and here i thought you’d be upset over the room.” your mother cooed as she made her way into the room.
you shifted yourself away from minho and you could have sworn you heard a whine of complaint come from him as your body lost contact to his. or maybe it was you.
his mother approached the bed as well, taking hold of his collar and straightening it out.
“goodness, you two didn’t even bother to change into sleep clothes.”
minho responded before you could, “we hadn’t meant to fall asleep.”
“what time is it?” you added.
“not late,” your mother responded, “it was still only 10:30 when we headed up to check on you.”
you nodded, and as the sleep wore off, the anger kicked in. before you burst, you stood and ushered them out of the room.
“i’ll get changed now, then, and then we can organize and unpack a little tonight.”
“we can help!” his mother chimed.
before you could deny the offer, minho did.
“no mother, we want to set up our bedroom ourselves, please.”
happy with the response, she nodded and followed your mother out of the room and back to wherever your fathers were waiting.
minho stood from the bed and looked into your closet.
“it doesn’t look like any of my clothes are here yet, so i’ll leave you to change. i can find something in a box and i’ll find a place to change.”
you nodded as he walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.
you sat on the edge of your bed for a moment before standing up and grabbing the same sleep clothes you wore every night. they had already been washed in the morning and pressed dry, ready for you to use again.
you tried to undo the buttons on the back of your dress, but you couldn’t reach. chan had helped you do them earlier in the day. you reached your arm over the opposite shoulder in an attempt to reach the buttons, straining the fabric of the dress in a weird way. you heard the sound of stitches coming undone and pulled your arm back into a normal position, inspecting the place the noise had come from. sure enough, there were little pieces of thread hanging around a small tear in the arm of your dress.
defeated, you sat down on your bed and waited for minho to return. it wasn’t long before he did, signaling his presence with a couple soft knocks to the door. you called for him to come in and he did, pausing in surprise when he saw you still in the dress, your night clothes bundled in your hands.
“i can’t reach the buttons.”
he threw his head back in understanding, taking a few steps towards you as you turned your back to him, moving your hair out of the way of the buttons.
you didn’t know what you’d expected, but the gentle touch of his fingers against your neck as he undid the top button sent a shiver through you. you hoped he didn’t notice, but by the way his movements stopped for a split second before continuing, you knew he had.
he undid the buttons until there were none left, leaving the top half of your back exposed to him where your dress fell open. his eyes ghosted over your shoulder blades and the smooth skin of your back. he wanted to place his palm there, to feel the warmth of your skin in more than just the tips of his fingers. he actually might have, despite his best judgement, if you hadn’t spoke up.
“are you done?”
he muttered a soft word of confirmation as you turned to face him again, hands holding the fabric to your chest to pretend it from falling off.
he stared at you for a moment before reality seemed to flow back into his head.
“let me know when you’re done.”
you nodded, waiting until he pulled the door closed behind him to let the dress fall to the floor. you took your time changing. it felt nice to be alone. after a few minutes, though, an unexpected feeling built up in your chest. it was nice to be alone, but you missed minhos company. or maybe you just missed company.
that was it, you told yourself, you just missed having someone around. your resolve was not breaking this quickly. you were upset and frustrated with how things were going and he was just as good as anyone, except maybe chan, to keep you company.
you called out for him to come back in and he did, immediately taking the clothes you’d just changed out of and setting them in a bin outside your door where they would wait until someone came and took them for cleaning.
you followed him to the door, heading right for a pile of books that had been taken off of your personal bookshelf. luckily, they hadn’t moved the shelf out of your bedroom yet, so you only had the books to carry back in.
you did the same for a few other things, things that you couldn’t imagine not having in your room, before turning to minho.
“what do you want moved in next?” he asked.
“something of yours.”
he was shocked by your reply, almost as if he had expected you to return your bedroom to the way it was before he arrived and pretend his things didn’t exist.
sure, you didn’t like that you had to remove your things from your room to make room for his stuff, but there wasn’t anything you could do about it right then. it wasn’t your room anymore. it belonged to the both of you.
at least until you could convince your parents to cancel the wedding, that is. that was still the plan.
“uh, okay,” minho began down the hallway, scanning his things as he did. he finally settled on a pretty, dark wooded desk. it had drawers along the side and it looked very used. you were surprised his parents let him keep it with how old it looked. it must have been important to him.
he insisted that he could carry it alone, but eventually he let you help. it fit perfectly in the room, almost like it was meant to be there. you placed it a couple feet away from your own desk, which was a similar color. it was a similar build too, with drawers on the sides.
back in the hallway, minho sighed as he attempted to move a large bookcase of his.
“we can’t move this alone. it can wait until morning.”
you nodded, thought for a moment, and then spoke.
“there’s room on mine, if you want. we can put this in storage and you can put your books with mine. there’s no need for two bookcases in one room.”
he was slightly taken aback by your offer, but nodded. he liked that you were getting used to sharing. getting used to it being not just your room, but his too. maybe you had changed your mind about him already.
“okay,” he agreed, “then we can take some books in.”
you grumbled, “but only one load. then we’re done for tonight.”
he laughed, assuring you that it was the last load of the night and walking back to the bedroom beside you, books in hand.
you helped him organize the books on the shelf, interlocking them with yours when it looked best to do so. the bookshelf was still quite empty, but that was fine. you had more books somewhere in the hall that you hadn’t bothered to search for and he had more, too.
you sat down on the bed, still messed up from your little nap, and sighed, but you didn’t say anything.
instead, minho did. after a few minutes of surprisingly comfortable silence, he sat down beside you and spoke.
“why won’t you let me kiss you?”
you were surprised by the sudden question, “you only tried once.”
“you’d only push me away again if i tried another time.”
“you gave me the chance to push you away.”
“because i knew you would.”
“then why try?”
“because i want to kiss you. why don’t you want to kiss me?”
you faltered at the confidence in his words. sure, his earlier actions had made it clear he wanted to kiss you, he wouldn’t have tried to otherwise, but hearing him say it out loud felt different. it made it click in your mind that he meant it, that it was real.
“i don’t- i already told you.”
“no you didn’t.”
“yes, i did.” you insisted, “i told you. i don’t want to be in a relationship that’s forced.”
and there it was. despite the progress he thought he’d made with you, there it was. that same angry, bitter attitude towards whatever relationship you two had.
he shoved the disappointment down his throat and replied, “then don’t force it. i’m not.”
he said it casually, just like he said and did everything else he did around you. his laid back demeanor gave the illusion that maybe his words were honest. maybe he wasn’t forcing anything he felt for you, maybe he genuinely did look forward to the wedding, and not only for the power. you shoved the thought from your mind, looking forward to marrying you and looking forward to taking control of your kingdom were not the same thing.
as had become common for you, you chose not to respond, instead scooting yourself along the bed until you had your head on a pillow, pulling the blankets over yourself. you felt the bed shift as he did the same, reaching out to shut off any lights in the room before crawling under the same blankets as you.
as badly as he wanted to pull you close to his chest and hold you while he fell asleep like he had hours before, he knew he couldn’t. everything in the way you were responding to him now told him that you would just push him away, maybe even change your mind about sleeping in the same bed as him and make him move to the floor. or worse, move there yourself.
no, minho didn’t want you to sleep on the floor and he didn’t want to upset you further than he knew he already had, so he stayed to himself. with your back to him, he listened to the even sounds of your breathing as you fell asleep. that would have to be enough for him for now.
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the next morning was a repeat of the night before, minus minhos thoughts that you could be finally accepting him, maybe even growing feelings that didn’t involve resentment and anger.
after sending his parents off with a promise of them returning soon, just like the night before, you spent the day rearranging the room with him. you refused any help from your parents or anyone else, partially because you didn’t want anyone to touch your things again and partially because you couldn’t stand to be around them at the moment.
unlike before, though, your comfort and coziness to minho had worn off. you were no longer showing him any form of physical affection.
you still kept the room fair, although it didn’t feel like it was half you and half him. it felt like its own place. it wasn’t partially him, the other half you- it was 100% the two of you, together.
you actually quite liked the way the room turned out. you weren’t being as snappy to him as you originally had been, but the atmosphere wasn’t anything close to before, when you’d looked to him for comfort from the pain rather than looking at him like he was the source of it all.
minho hated seeing you cry. when he noticed your state the night before and pulled you into his chest, he could have sworn his heart broke, like it would have fallen right out of his chest if you hadn’t been there holding it in. that reason exactly is why he felt so bad now.
he didn’t want you to cry, he didn’t want you to be sad, but he almost wished you would again, if it meant you would let your walls down for him again. anything to put you back in his arms.
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you were walking back to your bedroom after dinner and tending to your garden, exhausted from life and redecorating your room. you were growing used to spending nearly every waking, and sleeping, moment with minho, even beginning to enjoy his company, but that didn’t mean small moments alone weren’t appreciated.
you knew it would only be a few minutes, but walking alone to your shared bedroom while minho was speaking to your parents felt like heaven.
you didn’t remain alone for long, but it didn’t bother you. not when the person breaking the isolation was your best friend.
you jogged down the hallway and to your bedroom door where chan was standing, waiting for you. you hadn’t seen him since minho had arrived days prior.
you threw your arms around him the moment you reached him, happy to finally see him again. it hadn’t been that long, but considering he was usually with you constantly, a few days felt like forever. he pulled you into his chest, placing a kiss to your forehead as you smiled up at him.
you were about to ask him why he hadn’t been around when someone interrupted you.
“i thought you didn’t have brothers.” minho’s voice.
“i don’t.” you payed no attention to chan’s arm around your waist.
he nodded, “then this is?”
chan stepped away from you and reached his hand out to minho, “ah, i’m sorry! i’m chan, head of y/n’s personal guard.”
minho nodded again, taking chan’s hand and gripping it firmly.
“minho. y/n’s fiancé.”
releasing minhos hand and stepping back to you, chan laughed, “i know that, you’re all anyone is talking about recently.”
minho raised an eyebrow, locking his eyes to yours.
“am i?”
“of course!” chan babbled, “everyone’s excited for the wedding.”
minho scoffed, eyes still glued to yours.
“not everyone.”
he didn’t bother to excuse himself before he shoved past you and chan, an action that could have easily been avoided with all the space the hallway held, and into your bedroom.
a confused expression plastered on your face as you turned to chan.
“i know i complain a lot, but he’s usually not that bad. not even near it.”
chan frowned, lowering his voice. minho was right inside the door, after all.
“did you get into a fight or something?”
you shook your head, why did it actually bother you that he seemed upset with you?
“maybe you should go talk to him?”
you debated it in your mind. you probably should go check out what was bothering him, he was fine not even twenty minutes ago at dinner, but you also wanted to stay and talk to chan. you wanted to catch up, to vent.
as if reading your mind, chan turned you to face him.
“hey, go. we’ll see each other plenty now. your mom wanted us to give you space for a while, but the guard is back on full duty.”
you nodded, eyes trained on your bedroom door. you walked away from chan practically the moment he gave you the good to go, stepping into your bedroom and shutting the door behind you.
it didn’t take you long to find minho. he was sat in his desk chair, fiddling with the cuffs of his shirt. he didn’t look up until you addressed him.
your voice was soft, “minho?”
if he hadn’t been so frustrated, he would have celebrated at your caring tone.
instead, he leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms.
“what?”
your frown grew, “what happened? are you okay?”
“yeah,” he stood from his seat, mumbling as he crossed the room to the closet, where he pulled out his sleeping clothes and began to unbutton his day shirt, “i’m fine.”
maybe he expected you to leave it at that. it seemed that’s what he wanted, considering his choice to suddenly switch to his night clothes. whenever he started to undress, you hurried out of the room. this time, though, you were worried about him. actually worried about him.
so you stayed put.
“minho, i can tell that’s not true. you’re upset.”
he scoffed. as if your words had broken some dam inside of him, he let his frustrations free. his hands flew into the air, completely abandoning his shirt, which he had barely begun to unbutton.
“pardon me for not cheering when i see another man kissing my fiancé!”
“you- chan? you’re upset because i was speaking to my best friend.”
you said it more as a statement than a question.
“no,” he took a couple steps towards you, abandoning his sleep it’s clothes over the foot of the bed, “i’m upset because he kissed you.”
“on the forehead.”
“you wouldn’t let me do that though, would you?”
he was right in front of you now. you stuttered before replying, and it clicked in your mind: he was jealous. your demeanor softened.
“you’re mad that i let him kiss me and not you?”
he took a step back, running a hand through his hair as he nodded, a small pout on his lips.
the sight triggered something inside of you. he looked so real, so sad. he looked, for a lack of better words, genuinely hurt. it put the notion in your head that maybe he did care more about marrying you than just taking control of your kingdom.
you sighed, walking past him and to the closet, grabbing your change of clothes before stepping off into the bathroom to change. you heard him let out a soft sigh as you shut the door behind you, he must have assumed you dropped the topic. you didn’t know if he was glad that a fight hadn’t escalated or if he was upset that the conversation didn’t get to the point where he could kiss you and blame it on a flurry of emotions and jealousy.
you got into your sleeping clothes and, trusting that he had changed as well, you stepped back into the bedroom without asking if it was okay. you went straight for the bed, wordlessly finding a comfortable position as he slid in beside you. he reached out to shut off the lights and lay flat on his back, taking deep breaths and trying to get himself to calm down enough to sleep when he felt a weight on his waist followed by a warm presence pressing up against his side. he made a small sound of surprise as he looked down.
there you were, arm draped over his torso, cuddled into his side. your eyes were shut and your head rested against his chest.
any frustration he’d felt towards you far gone, he took the chance to wrap his arms around you, securing you to his body as if you were going to run away at any moment. he leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. it was so light you wondered if he’d meant for you to feel it at all.
you shifted slightly, keeping your arm around his waist as you offered a small smile against his chest.
“there. even.”
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things got easier from then on, although you wouldn’t admit it. you’d dropped your attempts at hating your new fiancé, how were you supposed to dislike him? you hadn’t dropped your hard feelings towards the situation and you definitely hadn’t agreed or started complying to the wedding, but you could bring it upon yourself to keep trying to be cold to minho. not even when the day was filled with wedding planning and dress fitting.
you’d woken up still in minho’s arms, even more so than you’d been when you had fallen asleep. your back was flat against his chest and one of his legs was sprawled over yours, practically trapping you as his arms held you around the waist.
maybe you should have been surprised to wake up that close to him or tried to pry his hands off of you, but you didn’t, and you didn’t want to. you hated yourself for it, but you were beginning to really consider the idea that he was your best bet. maybe complying and marrying him would be safer and more pleasant than anyone else your parents might throw your direction in the future if this wedding got called off.
minho shifted beside you, groaning at the light and removing an arm from your body to rub his eyes. the instant he did it, he dropped his arm back around you and held you close, as if he’d made a mistake by letting you go in the first place.
you laughed, and that’s always a good way to start a day.
it amazed minho how much your attitude towards him could change overnight. granted, you weren’t holding his hand and offering him kisses everywhere you went, but you had started actually initiating conversations with him. you joked with him and allowed yourself to laugh at his jokes, you didn’t even ignore him that much anymore. you weren’t treating him like your soon to be husband yet, but still. you treating him like a friend was better than you treating him like an enemy, even if it’s not what he really wanted.
“oh my god.” you groaned, “if i have to look at one more fucking shade of purple that looks exactly like the last and say which looks better i will absolutely lose my shit.”
he laughed, “you’re the one who said i would look hot in purple.”
you sent a glare his way, but it wasn’t like the ones you used to show him. it was joking, friendly.
“i did not say you’d look hot.”
“i think you did.”
“i can promise you i didn’t.”
“no, i’m pretty sure i remember you saying it. i think your exact words were, ‘oh, how lucky am i to have this treasure of a man as my future husband, i think purple-‘“
he was cut off by a call from the doorway of the room the two of you had been in practically all day, helping choose colors and getting fit for your wedding apparel.
“y/n, prince minho, dinner’s done.”
you knew immediately by the choice of laid back words that it was chan. no one else, not even your other friends, spoke to you like that outside of private.
you turned to the door, “one of these days i’m going to have you tarred and feathered for disrespecting me, bang chan.”
he laughed, “i’m sure you are.”
you met him at the door before minho even had the chance to stand, shoving him lightly.
“i am! watch, i’ll bring it up at dinner.”
he laughed, walking beside you as the three of you made your way to the dining room.
“isn’t it impolite to discuss executions during meal time?”
minho walked silently beside you, it was like you’d completely forgotten his existence once chan showed up.
“i might just break etiquette to speed up your punishment.”
another small laugh from him and then you were walking through the doors and into the dining room. you and minho took your seats at the table and chan took his standing along the wall with the rest of the guard and staff.
you turned to minho, “do you think we’re done for the day, then? or do we have more purple to look forward too?”
he shrugged your attempt at a joke off, trying not to show how bothered he was. so that’s how it was going to be? the second chan leaves, then he’s interesting enough to talk to again?
“maybe they’ll finally start making decorations and the suit and dress.”
either you hadn’t noticed his attitude change or didn’t care enough to react.
“i wonder how quickly they’ll pull things together.”
you really didn’t know. they could rush and work their butts off and you could be getting married within the next week, or they could take as much time as needed for preparations. you didn’t know. and if your parents had any clue, they didn’t bring it up.
their chosen dinner conversations were the same as they had been for the past many nights. talk about the wedding, who was going to be invited. was it bad manners to invite the brides minho had rejected? or was it polite? a good portion of the time not eating was spent with your mother trying to convince you to care more about the wedding. she was wholeheartedly convinced that you’d changed your mind and fallen in love with minho because you were being friendly now. she expected you to care more about the planning now that you didn’t seem so against it.
hurrying away from the dining room as soon as possible by claiming you’d had enough wedding talk for the day, which wasn’t a lie, you and minho made your way back to your bedroom. his earlier frustrations were forgotten as the two of you sat on the bed and talked about various books across the bookshelf.
as it turned out, some of the books ended up having to be put in storage. not for a lack of room, but simply because two copies were not needed. you shared a lot of the same interests.
“i told you,” he said, only half joking, “we’re meant for each other.”
you shoved him, pulling the book from his hands. before you could reply, he was speaking again.
“be careful! that’s my copy!”
you laughed, clutching the book to your chest and turning away as he reached for it.
“not anymore! it’s ours.”
“it is not. that is very much so mine.”
“no,” you insisted, moving again to keep him from grabbing it, “nothing in this room is yours. it’s all ours. or mine.”
he laughed, stopping his useless attempts at grabbing the book.
“yours?”
you nodded, “my stuff is still mine. but yours is ours now.”
with that, he jumped on you, tackling you onto your back. you dropped the book somewhere during the attack and it made a loud noise as it fell to the floor.
“what about you?” he asked, easily keeping you from struggling, “you’re mine, aren’t you?”
you stopped struggling, showing him the game was over.
“i don’t belong to anyone.”
you easily shoved him off of you in his stunned state. he hadn’t meant to offend you.
“y/n, that’s not what i meant.”
you cut him off as you shut the bathroom door behind you, night clothes in hand. you took significantly longer to change than you needed, both you and him knew that. he would have had time to crawl into bed and fall asleep three times over as he as waiting for you, but he didn’t. truth be told, he wasn’t sure if he was capable of falling asleep without you beside him anymore. he might have to test that theory, he didn’t know if you would let him hold you that night after he unintentionally upset you.
just as things were beginning to work, he messed it up. he really hadn’t meant to imply he owned you in any way, he was only trying to be cute, maybe get you to say yourself that you were going to marry him, maybe even that you wanted to.
he didn’t know the exact rules of falling in love, but if he could say anything for certain it would be that he was in love with you. maybe it was when he saw your name on that paper and his fantasy became a possible reality that he really fell, or maybe it was when he saw you face to face for the first time after learning you’d be the one he’d marry, he really didn’t know. he had no clue when it changed from some childish crush into fill blown love, but it did.
was it even possible to be in love with someone you’d only met a handful of times and were only paired to marry a few weeks prior? it must have been. otherwise, how would he explain the feeling in his chest whenever he saw you?
when you finally came out of the bathroom, you silently put your clothes in the basket and crawled into bed. like always, minho switched off the lights and secured the covers over himself, shifting until he found a comfortable position. he was debating in his mind if he should reach out and try to hold you or if that would just make everything worse when you scooted so your back was to his chest, not outright cuddling him but giving the invitation.
he obliged immediately, wrapping his arm around you while the other went to play with your hair. he placed another one of his gentle, barely-there kisses to the side of your head as he muttered a soft, “i’m sorry.”
he didn’t know whether you replied or not, he fell asleep as the last syllable fell from his lips.
you didn’t go as easily. if your internal clock was at all accurate, you’d been laying there for at least two hours, wide awake. you couldn’t pinpoint exactly what was keeping you up, probably the wedding, maybe the small fight with minho. either way, you could think of a better way to spend the time as long as you weren’t going to fall asleep.
carefully, you pulled minho’s arms off of you and slowly crawled out of bed, trying your hardest not to wake him up. you stood at the side of the bed for a moment, watching minho to make sure you hadn’t disturbed him, before creeping over to the door. you opened it as quietly as possible and peaked out. neither of the guards stationed outside your room were chan.
felix was on duty though, and he sent you a confused look as you stepped into the hallway and pulled the door shut behind you.
“where are you going? if you need something i’ll get it for you.”
you shook your head, “just can’t sleep. is chan in the bunks?”
felix nodded and you started off down the hallway towards the rooms the guards slept in when they didn’t have night duty.
“hey, wait,” felix called after you, moving slightly as if he were going to follow, “i’m not technically supposed to let you go alone.”
you frowned at him, “it’s literally two minutes away and i’m headed to a room full of guards. i’ll be fine.”
he thought for a moment before moving back to stand in his original position, “fine. but if some hallway demon kills you on the way there that’s on you.”
you chuckled at his joke and made your way through the halls and to the wing that houses all of the staff that lived there. you weren’t technically supposed to go there at night, you weren’t really supposed to even leave your room at night, but none of the guards in the halls tried to stop you on your journey. it wasn’t uncommon for you to visit chan at night, especially not when you were younger. the both of you used to have trouble sleeping and it was much easier for you to sneak out and into his room than the other way around.
you gently opened the door and stepped into the room, heading right for chans bed. there were a dozen other sleeping guards, not all of them from your personal guard, also asleep on their own beds. you tapped chan awake, stifling your laugh when he flinched awake.
you used to wake him at least half of the nights he didn’t have duty, yet he still flinched every time you woke him up.
he looked confused to see you there but he didn’t hesitate to stand and follow you into the hallway.
when there, you went down away from the doors so you could talk freely without disturbing anyone and slid down the wall. chan did the same, seating himself right next to you.
“what’s up? you haven’t woken me up in the middle of the night for a while.”
you laughed, “yeah, i don’t know. i couldn’t sleep. plus, i’ve missed you. even with the guard back, i haven’t been able to spend time with you recently.”
he nodded, leaning to rest his head on your shoulder, “i know. i’ve missed you too.”
there was a brief pause before he spoke again.
“what’s on your mind?”
you scoffed lightly, “i don’t think there’s room for anything other than thoughts about the wedding right now. i can’t even breathe without someone mentioning it.”
chan chuckled, “it is kind of a big deal.”
you ignored him, “i don’t want to marry minho, chan.”
he took a deep breath, “why?”
“why?”
“why? tell me exactly what’s so bad about him.”
you didn’t hesitate before answering, “i’m being forced into it! i didn’t even get a choice, chan!”
he ignored your words, “no, what’s bad about him? not the situation, not the wedding, minho.”
you thought for a moment, wracked your brain for answers, but you couldn’t think of one genuine issue you had against him specifically. you’d actually began to enjoy being around him.
chan waited for a while before he decided you weren’t going to answer.
“it seems to me like you two click really well.”
you shrugged.
“i think you should give him a chance, y/n.”
your brows furrowed in confusion, “what do you mean?”
“i mean i think you’re upset because you don’t want to get married, not because you don’t want to get married to him. and i think he might be changing your mind whether you know it or not.”
your frown didn’t lift.
“have you ever thought that maybe it’s fate that he ended up being your only option?”
not only did your frown once again not lift, it got deeper.
“i’m telling you y/n, a best friend knows. no matter how much you say you hate him, you’re falling for that boy.”
you cut in without hesitation, “no, i am not.”
his eyes widened and a grin spread across his face, “you are! no one is that defensive when they’re not lying.”
you hit him lightly and he continued, “for real, y/n. i think you like him more than you realize. just play nice for a while.”
“i am playing nice.”
“no,” he said, “you’re acting nice. actually let your guard down around him. let him in. let yourself feel the things you’re feeling for him.”
you grumbled. if anyone was going to be able to talk you into this marriage, it would be chan.
“okay.”
he followed your actions as you stood up.
“do you want me to walk you back?”
you shook your head, “i’ll be fine. go back to bed.”
he chuckled at your grumpy attitude, pulling you into a tight hug before letting you go. he watched until you turned a corner and he could no longer see you before stepping back into his room.
felix greeted you at your bedroom door.
“no hallway demons?”
“no hallway demons.”
“you’re lucky.”
you laughed at the boy and sent him a weird look to which he smiled in return. just as you had earlier, you carefully retraced your steps until you were back in bed with minho. taking chan’s request for you to try to warm up more to the idea of marrying minho, you secured yourself next to him, wrapping an arm around his torso. although, you probably would have done that even if minho’s name hadn’t even come up in your and chan’s conversation. you were finding that being in minho’s arms while you slept felt good. the thought that being held by anyone while sleeping would be comforting, it wasn’t just minho, crossed your mind before chan’s words echoed in your head.
“let yourself feel the things you’re feeling for him.”
maybe it was that it was minhos arms that made it so gentle and caring. if you thought about it, you couldn’t make a list longer than what you could count on one hand of who you would let sleep in the same bed as you, let alone cuddle you while sleeping. you’d only ever fallen asleep in minho of chans arms. and your parents, of course.
maybe you did feel deeper for the boy than you let yourself realize. maybe, despite every word coming out of your mouth insisting that you didn’t, you wanted to marry him.
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several days went by, several wedding preparations were made. it turned out that they’d decided to go the rushed route, planning to hold the wedding ceremony as soon as possible. it was only two day’s out now. even though you still hadn’t even officially stated your acceptance of the wedding, preparations were in full force.
as you studied your reflection and took in the details of the gown you’d be wearing as you walked down the isle, you wondered how hard the seamstress’ must have worked to produce such a gorgeous piece of art in only a few days.
it was the traditional white color and it wasn’t anything overly fancy, you’d made it clear you wouldn’t wear it if it was. despite how quickly it had been made, it was clear it wasn’t rushed. every stitch looked perfect.
there were small embroidered designs along the fabric, popping out against the white of the base. the designs were a beautiful lilac purple, and although you knew that you and minho had chosen the exact shade, you wouldn’t have been able to decipher the shade from any of the other light purples that the seamstresses had in stock.
you assumed that minho had the same purple accenting his suit, but you had no clue what it looked like. your mothers were very adamant about neither of you seeing each other in the wedding apparel before the big event.
you bet he looked amazing.
you continued to admire yourself and the dress as several people checked the fitting, making sure the sizing was perfect and didn’t need any more alterations. when they decided it was, you found yourself not wanting to take the dress off quite yet. you couldn’t help but be excited for the next time you’d get to wear it.
minho was waiting for you when you stepped out of the room and into the hallway. apparently his fitting had taken less time than yours. suits did tend to be easier to size.
you let him take your hand as the two of you made your way to your bedroom. you’d taken chan’s advice and stopped shoving down emotions, and it made you realize how much you genuinely enjoyed minho. as much as you hated the way things worked and the way you got put together, you were beginning to think that maybe it had some sense to it. chan might have been right when he said that minho being your only choice was fate.
you dropped his hand to pick up the watering jug and fill it. he insisted on carrying it to your garden. you made no attempt to take it back when he held it out for you.
“no,” you laughed, “i showed you how to tell if they need watered yesterday. you do it.”
his eyes widened, “y/n, i seriously don’t think you want me to do that, i’ll kill them.”
“you will not,” you giggled, “but fine. i’ll help you.”
you approached the first plant along with him. it was a large basil plant. you didn’t use it for cooking or baking, the garden had plenty of basil that was used to harvest, but this one was just for show.
“check the soil.”
he did as you instructed, pressing his fingers into the dirt to check for moisture.
“i think it’s okay?”
his words came out as more of a question than a statement.
you reached forward and double checked, smiling and clapping your hands together when you realized he’d gotten it correct.
he did the same for the next plant, a lavender bush, claiming more confidently now that it didn’t need watered yet either. you checked, letting out an exaggerated gasp.
“i can’t believe you’re trying to kill my lavender plant. how could you?”
he sputtered, “i’m not! i really thought that it was fine!”
you huffed, taking the water from his hand and watering the plant.
“i can never trust you again.”
you started to check the other plants, watering a few of them. he complained and promised he’d learn better, but you continued to ignore him.
“my own fiancé... trying to kill my babies.”
you only stopped teasing him when he wrapped his arms around you from behind, holding you tight and promising into your shoulder that he didn’t want to hurt your plants.
you turned to face him, his hands still resting on your hips.
“okay, i’ll give you one more chance.”
you gestured towards the last few plants you had yet to check, a couple flowers that minho couldn’t what you said were named.
he walked up to them, taking his time to check them before turning to you.
“the yellow ones are okay, the purple and blue ones need watered.”
you eyes him suspiciously as you went to check his claim, breaking out in a smile when you found that he was correct.
“technically, the yellow ones could use a little water, but i’ll say you passed.”
he laughed and watched you water the last plants before reaching out your free hand and taking hold of his. you set the watering can by the door and made your way back to your bedroom where minho dropped your hand and headed to his desk.
he’d grown confident enough in your comfort towards him that he wasn’t afraid to do things like that anymore, drop your hand or break away from a hug. he knew you’d let him hold you again. it wasn’t like less than a week earlier where he felt like you might run away if he didn’t hold you tight enough.
he leaned down and shuffled through some papers on his desk. you recognized them as archery point sheets. he hadn’t been lying when he said he was good, he scored nines and tens easily from distances you wouldn’t have even been able to get close to hitting the target at, even after letting him give you some tips on aiming.
you snickered as you pulled out one specific scoring sheet that caught your eye. it was an insanely long distance round, the longest he’d ever tried yet, and he’d managed to score two nines and an eight.
you laughed as you help the paper up, “an eight? you suck.”
he tried to glare at you, but a smile poked through. you saw him made a move and dropped the paper, darting to get away from him.
he caught you quite easily, tackling you onto the bed. he held you loosely as he straddled you.
“take it back. say i’m the best archer you’ve ever seen.”
you shook your head, smile plastered on your lips.
“take it back!” he whined.
you shook your head again, trying not to laugh.
“whatever.” he released you from his grip, crawling off of you, “this is why i tried to kill your plants.”
you gasped, “i knew it!”
he laughed as he reached for his pajamas, stepping into the bathroom and pulling the door lightly shut. it didn’t close all the way, there was still a small crack. he wasn’t as shy as you were, you’d learned that all too well. you were surprised he even went into the bathroom at all.
he waited until he heard you drop your day clothes into the bin before coming back into the bedroom. he put his dirty clothes next to yours and crawled into bed beside you, following his same routine of shutting off the lights before pulling you into his arms.
as he always did with you there beside him, he fell asleep easily.
you had fallen into a deep sleep as well before something woke you up a couple hours later. you couldn’t say what it was that had woken you, maybe it was nothing at all. regardless, you sat there for a few minutes before realizing you weren’t going back to sleep any time soon. you looked at the boy beside you.
you considered waking him up to keep you company until you could fall asleep again, but decided against it. he looked too peaceful. chan, however, you had no issue waking from a peaceful sleep.
sitting a few yards from any doors leading to people sleeping, you spoke to your best friend.
“am i going crazy, channie?”
he hummed, “probably, but why?”
you sent a light glare towards him before answering, “being kind of excited for the wedding.”
he broke out into a huge grin, “i so called it.”
you frowned in confusion and he continued.
“i said you were in love with him and you so are.”
you shook your head, “i’m not... in love with him,”
why did the words seem foreign?
“i just think i might, i don’t know, actually see us working out, and not just as a royal couple, together to rule. like as a genuine pair.”
he made a sound of understanding, “you’re totally in love with him.”
you didn’t deny it a second time.
you frowned as you approached your bedroom door. there was a faint light peaking out from under the crack in the door. you inched it open to find minho awake, sat up on the bed reading with a single lamp on. he looked up when he heard you enter.
“hey,” you greeted him, “why are you awake?”
he shrugged, “guess i got cold without you next to me.”
you got back into bed with him, pulling the blankets over your legs and leaning over to see what he was reading.
“what are you reading?”
he shut the book momentarily, marking his page with his finger and showing you the cover before flipping it back open and resuming where he left off.
you frowned. it wasn’t like him to ignore you like this.
“is something wrong? did you have a nightmare?”
he shut his book, tossing it to the ground beside his side of the bed. he pressed his lips together.
“yeah, i keep having these dreams that my fiancé is leaving in the middle of the night to secretly meet up with some guy. it’s weird.”
you raised your eyebrows, “who told you that?”
he shrugged, “asked the guard outside the door one night after you left what you were doing, he said you were visiting chan.”
you nodded, “yeah, i do that sometimes, is that an issue?”
he scoffed, “no, i just brought it up for fun.”
you pursed your lips, “really, minho? why does it bother you so much?”
there was no hesitation in his next words, almost as if he’d been itching to say them for a while now.
“is there something going on between you two?”
you scoffed, “seriously? you really think that?”
by now he had stood from the bed, “it doesn’t seem so crazy.”
you stood as well, challenging him as you stepped around the bed and in front of him.
“yeah, it does. it sounds insane.”
he looked you straight in the eyes, “does it? because it makes perfect sense to me. you won’t let me kiss you, you won’t sign the marriage contact even though you know you’re stuck with me, you’re so comfortable around him and you keep leaving in the middle of the night to meet with him in secret. it literally screams affair, y/n!”
“you seriously believe that i would cheat on you?”
“i don’t even think you see it as cheating since you don’t take a single fucking part of our relationship seriously.”
he took a step forward and you instinctively stepped back.
“i do take it seriously.”
he continued to close in on you until your back was pressed to the wall.
“then act like it.”
without thinking, you did just that. you acted.
you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him down, crashing his lips to yours. it wasn’t what you’d expected your first kiss to be like, you’d actually imagined it would be at the altar, but you weren’t complaining.
he reacted immediately, hands finding their way across your body. he slid one down your leg, stopping at your thigh and tapping it. you got the message, jumping up and wrapping your legs around his waist. your back collided with the wall and the paintings hung there shook a little, but you couldn’t be bothered to care. not when he tasted as good as he did.
one hand secure on your thigh to hold you up, the other found its way under your night gown and up your bare leg to the bare skin of your torso. he broke away for a moment as his fingers inched higher up.
“is this okay?”
you barely had time to mumbled a yes before your lips were back on his. you hadn’t realized you wanted to kiss him so bad until you finally did.
he let you breathe for a second as he peppered kisses along your neck, his hand exploring your body under your gown. his fingers found their way to your breasts and he squeezed one, causing a soft moan to fall from your lips.
he cursed at the sound, attaching his lips back to yours and turning to walk you to the bed. he easily sat you down, back to the mattress, and hiked up your night dress. you let out another soft moan when his hands finally made their way to your core. he ran his fingers over your clothed folds.
“you swear this is only mine?”
you nodded, “yes.”
“you promise?” he spoke between kisses, “tell me you promise.”
“i promise.”
that seemed to be enough for him as he growled against your lips, slipping his hand down the waistband of your panties.
you struggled to keep quiet as he finally made direct contact to your dripping core.
he cooed, “what, baby? no need to be quiet. who’s gonna hear? the guards?” you could feel his breath against your neck, “is chan on duty? is he right outside the door? let him hear you.”
you could only whine in response as he toyed with your clit.
you made a sound of annoyance when he pulled his hand from your panties, but your disappointment didn’t last for long. he pulled you to sit up so he could remove your night clothes, tossing them god knows where on the ground. he let out a deep groan as his eyes came on contact with your bare chest.
he brought his hands up to cup them, one in each hand.
“you’re gorgeous.”
he let one of his hands fall back to caressing the rest of your body and replaced it with his lips, taking your nipple into his mouth. despite his earlier demands not to try to silence yourself, a hand flew to your mouth as you let out an embarrassingly loud moan for how little stimulation you were getting.
he popped off your breast and licked a long stripe down your stomach until he reached the waistband of your underwear. he glanced up at you to make sure you were still on board before looking his fingers on them and pulling them down your legs. immediately, you tried to close your legs in embarrassment, but he easily held them open.
he placed sloppy kisses to your neck as his fingers teased your entrance.
“has he ever seen you like this?”
“no.”
“you really expect me to believe that?”
“it’s true.” your words came out strangled as he slowly began to slide a finger into your heat. it was unusual and uncomfortable at first, but you got used to it, nearly screaming when he curled his finger and a line of pleasure shot through you.
he hummed, “i can tell you’re not lying, baby. no one is this sensitive if they’ve been fucking their royal guardsman behind their fiancé’s back.”
you whined as he added another finger, “haven’t- haven’t done this before.”
he hushed you, “i know, angel. you’re doing so well, just relax.”
you gripped tightly onto his shirt as he continued to work his fingers inside of you. with a particularly rough curl of his fingers, you felt something inside of you let go and a wave of pleasure flowed over your body. you let out the most heavenly sounds as minho worked your through your orgasm and he felt a swell of pride knowing that he was the only one who had ever made you feel so good. he was the only one who would ever make you feel this way.
he rode you through your orgasm before placing a gentle kiss to your lips. you tugged are the bottom of his shirt.
“are you sure, baby?”
you nodded, far too worked up to let out coherent words. he complied, slipping his shirt over his shoulders and ridding himself of his pants. you stared at his chest, reaching out to touch his skin before you even realized you were doing it. you slid your hand down his body until you came in contact with his hard length. he hissed as your hand wrapped around him, slowly stroking him. you couldn’t keep your eyes off of his cock as you basked in the sounds he made. the sounds you made him make.
he reached down and grabbed your wrist, “baby, i won’t last much longer if you keep this up.”
you nodded, reluctantly letting him guide your hand away from his length. you wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your fingers in his hair as you felt him like himself up with your entrance.
the noise you let out when he began to sink into you could only be described as divine. minho had to stop for a moment and recollect himself, he really wouldn’t last long if you sounded like that at every move he made.
after a few moments, he was fully buried inside of you. he waited for you to adjust to his size before slowly pulling out, only to roughly slam back into you.
he had every intention of going slow and being gentle for your first time, but everything, from the way your pussy felt wrapped around him to the way you moaned out his name was too much for him.
despite his previous remark for you to let yourself be loud, he guided your face to his shoulder when he became genuinely concerned you may wake the entire castle.
“bite down.”
you did as he said, sinking your teeth into the flesh of the junction between his shoulder and neck. he let out a sound that made you think for a moment that you’d bitten too hard, but when you released your grip he groaned out, asking you to do it again.
he brought his hand between your bodies and began running slow circles onto your clit as his cock worked magic inside of you.
“im close. gonna fill you up, is that okay?”
you barely managed to get out a yes through the pleasure you were feeling.
“fuck, gonna let me fuck my babies into you, huh?”
he adjusted your legs and the new angle plus his fingers working expertly on your clit threw you over the edge.
“you’re going to be a great mother one day.”
you bit down hard on his shoulder as you came, only releasing the grip to tell him how good he was making you feel.
he came soon after, muttering praises and gushing about how good you did. he groaned as he gave a last few thrusts, watching as his and your cum leaked out with every thrust of his hips. the sight nearly made him hard again.
he pulled out, grabbing his discarded night shirt and wiping his length off before tossing it to the side again. he leaned back over you, connecting his lips to yours to swallow the whine you let out when his fingers connected back to your core.
he collected the cum that had dripped out and spread itself along your thighs and onto the sheets, pushing it back into you with his fingers.
he hushed you as you whined from overstimulation, “i know baby, i know, but we don’t wanna waste any, do we?”
you shook your head.
“no, we don’t. that’s my good girl.”
he connected his lips back to yours, “you’ll look gorgeous with my baby in your belly.”
you were honestly too fucked out to process anything that was happening, just laying there and letting him do what he wanted. despite the discomfort the overstimulation brought, you couldn’t help but complain when he pulled his fingers out of you, wiping them on his night shirt and slipping your panties back onto you.
needless to say, you slept easily after that.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b19282048be7587add7004b8e4fdc430/6e902cd6a647d979-24/s540x810/a798aa57be05189efac03b352d8bed10d748353e.jpg)
you were beyond sore the next morning, but you couldn’t bring yourself to regret it. the achy legs and raw throat were worth it.
you hurried to get dressed and shower off the sweat and other substances on your body the next morning before hurrying down for breakfast. minho had showered with you, insisting that since he made the mess, he should clean it up.
although your parents had already been confident that you’d changed your mind about the wedding, if anyone had doubts, including yourself, they were long gone.
a drastic change from even just the day before, you and minho stole kisses nearly any time you could. leaning over to grab the salt? kiss. walking past him to grab a book? kiss. sitting down waiting for more orders on how to help prepare for the wedding that was only a day away? kiss, kiss, kiss.
you’d been so caught up in your newfound love for kissing your fiancé that you didn’t even notice as chan snuck up to talk to you.
instinctively, minho’s arm tightened around your waist. he believed you when you promised him that you and chan were just friends, but he was still protective.
“so... hyunjin tells me i was right.”
you frowned in confusion, “what?”
“hyunjin said i was right. he had guard duty outside of your room last night and he told me you really warmed up to minho overnight.”
you nearly choked on your own spit at the realization that not only had your guards, your friends, heard last nights events, by the sound of it, they’d told everyone else.
minho didn’t even try to his hide proud smile has you blushed, covering your face in his chest.
chan turned to minho, “i knew she’d fall for you eventually. she used to gush about how cute you were when we were kids.”
you opened your mouth to protest, “that is not true.”
it really wasn’t. maybe you’d mentioned that he was easier to be around than many of the other royal, stuck up kids, but you had never said anything close to what chan claimed.
chan turned to minho, nodding his head as he scratched his nose, “it’s totally true.”
“it’s literally just not.”
he made a sound of disagreement.
“that is a big fat lie and you know it!”
you reached out to hit him and he dodged it, making a scene out of saying felix called him before hurrying away. you turned to minho.
“it’s not true.”
he shrugged, “it’s probably true.”
“it’s not!”
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b19282048be7587add7004b8e4fdc430/6e902cd6a647d979-24/s540x810/a798aa57be05189efac03b352d8bed10d748353e.jpg)
when you walked down the isle, minho could have swore his heart stopped. you looked gorgeous. the dress framed you perfectly and the delicate flower crown placed on your head looked just on you. he made a mental note to compliment whoever had planned your full outfit.
the closer you got, the more minho worried that your vows would be droned out by the sound of his heart beating against his rib cage.
you finally stepped in front of him, letting him get a clear view of you in your dress for the first time. you weren’t much better, speechless as you took in how handsome he looked. your felt your eyes began to well up at the realization of what was happening. who would have known you’d be crying from happiness, not disappointment or fear?
your eyes met minho’s own glassy ones and you let out a small laugh, speaking so only he could hear.
“i was right when i said you’d look hot in purple.”
#stray kids#skz#lee know#lee minho#skz imagines#skz scenarios#skz blurbs#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#stray kids blurbs#lee know imagines#lee know scenarios#lee know blurbs#minho#skz smut#stray kids smut#lee know smut#skz fluff#stray kids fluff#lee know fluff#skz angst#stray kids angst#lee know angst
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“you only saw me as a weapon!” an in-depth analysis of tommy and techno’s relationship /rp
a mild focus on techno’s thoughts since it’s his speech, but not one or the other is in the right here. a lot of this might have been said, but this is a BIG collection from pogtopia to doomsday to address as many angles as possible. to preface, i don’t think tommy sees techno as a weapon and nothing else, but the point remains that techno feels like he does, and that’s important.
this is from like january btw lol
we’ll start with “the blade” tommy’s nickname for techno, which got adopted by a lot of the server (as tommy’s nicknames tend to be). most other people have the Big [X] format, but techno gets this specialised nickname. i think the reason he developed a negative association with it was because of when it was used; when they need him for fights. the most important would be the vault reveal, with wilbur getting everyone to victoriously chant “we have the blade!” to boister morale. this would have been fine in and of itself, if it weren’t for the events of the rest of the day and what that name would come to represent. it ends up becoming a taunt to him, because that’s what people get close to him for. his use to them as the blade rather than his friendship to them as technoblade
tommy’s always very happy to call in techno for help, and techno usualy sorts it out with... minimal effort required. i do see this more as a blend of tommy’s pride in knowing techno and smugness at having that kind of upperhand in a fight over him viewing techno solely as a weapon to use, but this still ends up being detrimental to their friendship because of how much it happens. remember, the entire reason techno joined the server was to help wilbur and techno form pogtopia. techno doesn’t mind helping tommy out, but at some point it’s going to be frustrating, being called in for any and all minor struggles. but in the end of the day, it’s fine, because they’re brothers under the same cause. destroying manberg. Oh Wait.
the main issue came after the festival, with that faith and trust tommy had in techno being shattered; rightfully so, because watching tubbo get murdered was traumatic for him, because for tommy the pit was no way to settle that conflict (which reminded, wasn’t techno’s suggestion, it was proposed and pushed onto them by wilbur). since tommy sees technoblade as unbeatable, he couldn’t understand why techno was so easily peer-pressured by manberg. he was threatened by how many people were against him, he was stressed dealing with the voices telling him to do it, he didn’t see any other way out, he wasn’t getting any support from his only other allies even though he was looking right at them and they still did nothing.
but tommy didn’t understand because he thought techno could have won. techno did try to stall as well, but without orders from his friends he ended up following schatt’s, and once he realised he had the power to kill everyone on stage, he just gave into that power. the miscommunication during the pogtopia arc was why techno felt as betrayed as he did, and why the victim complex argument annoys me so much, since he was kept in the dark for that long while grinding resources for the army. also, since techno wasn’t there for l’manberg’s peaceful days or the start of the disc saga he would never understand how important those attachments were to people, so he’d feel little remorse blowing them all up (especially since he knew that was the backup plan for pogtopia anyway, and just because people were unhappy about it didn’t change the fact that it was a plan)
a lot of people say that techno should have known that pogtopia’s goal was to form a new government, that at some point he should have overheard the real plan. everyone agreed to ‘destroy manberg’ (as in the government not the land) but somehow techno never found out about the ‘restoring l’manberg’ part of the plan. how that happened, who knows, but in the end of the day, the writers chose for that miscommunication to happen for the story. it’s not a how or a why, it’s just a fact that was written in. he didn’t find out until it was right in front of him, and he was bound to feel betrayed by that, enough that he was driven to do something irrational. my personal theory is that techno was mainly following wilbur’s orders, and because wilbur was the real traitor, chances are he never mentioned any forming of a new government since he knew that would lose techno’s support. wilbur was probably using techno as a weapon, that was his mentality for a lot of people back then, but since he was the leader of pogtopia then that negative transference carried on to the rest of the members for techno, most of all tommy as he was the other key founder, and not as underhanded about getting techno’s help. i’d say wilbur’s address of techno during the final speech was the a key reason as to why techno doesn’t feel as used by him than he is with tommy, solidifying the anarchy bros before dying, meaning anything else could be revealed.
after the war, the bedrock bros were completely alienated from eachother. tommy started to blame everything about l’manberg’s destruction on techno, since wilbur died and ghostbur isn’t really at fault for anything. techno distanced himself from everything, going into retirement for the unforeseeable future because he felt like his violent anarchist tactics were futile and grew tired of constant conflict. he talked to tommy a few times during retirement, and every single time, he asks tommy how the government was working out for him. when he was at risk of being exiled, just before being exiled and immediately after exile. he wanted tommy to see the government in the same light as he did, because when l’manberg sold him out he realised they were the same. they’d both been betrayed by the government and from that point on he fully believed tommy would be better off away from l’manberg. but every time tommy said no, because he believed in the original dream wilbur had for l’manberg and because he trusted tubbo’s leadership. techno was smug when he was proved right because of course he was he’s technoblade. plus, they did view eachother as enemies at this point, so it’s not unacceptable for them to argue with eachother right now.
that brings us to the execution. traumatising! the refusal to run a fair trial and the dehumanising treatment from his old allies in pogtopia hammer this home, but importantly they rope philza into the chaos this time. ALSO it’s important to mention that techno was killed; he just got an extra life from the totem. he was actually killed and his character experienced that pain as punishment. he was pushed out of retirement, which was unjust in his eyes, since he believed he had genuinely changed. it didn’t help that quackity explicitly told him it wasn’t actually punishment for the withers, but instead a move to consolidate power, furthering his view of the cabinet as corrupt. from that point on he left retirement. he’d been doing well without violence, building connections with new people like vikk and lazar and finding a fragile form of peace, but in the end this shattered it. he’s back to being the blade, speaking with violence, because l’manberg made it clear there was no other way for him to be heard at this point. so he’s going to destroy them, even if he has to do it alone.
enter stage raccooninnit.
tommy taking refuge in techno’s house because he knew techno was rich enough for him to steal his resources and strong enough to defend him from dream is... interesting. he couldn’t go back to l’manberg, but he took refuge with a man who he viewed as a villain. this probably doesn’t help techno’s opinion of him, since he is quite literally using him for his resources, but in the end of the day tommy was desperate and quite literally on the verge of death, so he seemed to take some kind of pity on him. the exile period of their relationship is definitely the most important part of this argument, because it was just the two of them: no wilbur or pogtopia as an external force (though the pressure of dream and l’manberg still affected things) but in the same way ultimately doomed to fail. they fight for a moment, but ultimately settle as ‘business partners’. which quickly evolves back into a friendship like the one they had before the festival.
my least favourite take is that either one of them never valued the other at this point because this is just.... violently not true. they started off working for mutual benefit; tommy explicitly agreed to do minor terrorism in l’manberg and to help techno get his weapons back in return for techno’s help getting the discs back and taking refuge in his house. from the start both of them stated their limits:
techno was always planning on getting revenge on l’manberg for what happened on the day of his execution
tommy never wanted to upset tubbo, and wanted to put getting his discs back first
should note that tommy changes his mind on the disc’s priority later on, but at the point of their alliance he does make it clear that’s what he wants out of the partnership. the issue is that from the start both of them went in with blind optimism. neither of them lied to eachother or forced them to change their viewpoints but in the end of the day they could never be on the same side as long as l’manberg was involved. (note, i think some people think he wasn’t but techno was actually planning on helping tommy getting the discs back, with him getting annoyed at tommy letting tubbo give dream the disc because that made both of their jobs so much harder, but it was more of a long term goal bc he knew dream was hard to beat. plus before his execution, he visited tommy and strongly implied he would be willing to help with the discs, and that he would be a better ally in those personal aims than NLM were)
i don’t understand the ‘techno was only using tommy’ accusation here because like... how? what would he have to gain by having tommy on his side? he could definitely have blown up l’manberg without his help, so why bring him in at all? it was a very mutual agreement of ‘we’re using eachother’ that developed into genuine friendship. i’ve always seen it as a teaching experience: techno knows tommy had been wronged by NLM, and by extension tubbo, and by taking him on these minor terrorism trips, he’s showing tommy the worst of l’manberg. look, look at this execution stand, look at what they’ve done. and in doing this, he’s trying to prove to tommy that what he’s going to do to l’manberg is right. and in showing him the worst of NLM, he’s neglecting all of its good parts, but again, techno cant see any positives in l’manberg, and is trying to show tommy that everyone, especially tommy, would be better off without it. and tommy had criticisms of l’manberg before he was exiled, especially in regards to tubbo. he told ranboo the reason he chose wilbur to be president instead of tubbo was because he was worried the presidency would ruin their friendship, and Look At Exactly What Happened. techno highlighting the flaws of the country to tommy was easy because it WAS flawed and it hurt both of them. and techno’s hope was that tommy would join him in the eventual destruction of it, because he wanted to share his revenge with tommy and for him to get his own justice against l’manberg. but it... didn’t quite work out that way.
they both tried to make it easier for the other; techno told tommy he didn’t need to fight against l’manberg if he didn’t want to, but tommy came with him to the festival anyway to confront dream, despite techno’s mission being against the government in that situation. tommy started to view tubbo’s cabinet as corrupt for the execution and neglecting him during exile, and ended up helping techno out around the base and even toning down the purposeful annoyance (per techno’s ooc request). and the day before the green festival, he told techno he would help to destroy l’manberg (not knowing how quickly things would escalate the next day, since doomsday was fairly spontaneous) but in the end they would never be able to find a full compromise: techno would always be an anarchist and tommy could never hurt tubbo.
people accuse techno of not caring for tommy, which really annoys me because it’s not?? true??? if anything he shows more outward affection than tommy did. he didn’t have any benefit from taking in tommy, but he still did it. it’s not really basic decency either, given that they were technically enemies beforehand. he picked up on tommy’s fragile state around dream and defended, hid him despite the fact that he owed dream, he kept him away from logsted and the final control room after realising how upsetting they were. he exchanged the christmas presents, he jumped in to defend him against the rest of the server and when tommy betrayed techno, he was genuinely hurt! he was wrecklessly impulsive in a way the calculated blade usually wasn’t, almost blowing up half his house (including almost killing his villagers) because of the negative association with dnret.
that’s not to say tommy doesn’t also get absolutely crucified for betraying techno because of all of techno did for him. again it was somewhat inevitable. tommy said it himself, he was turning into someone he didn’t want to be, he was hurting people, and it was somewhat because he was living with technoblade. he was so powerless under dream, and he liked the feeling of power he got from teaming with techno, so much so that it drove him to cruelty, with even techno telling him he went too far with fundy. in the end, it’s probably for the best that he set that boundary and left to go back to l’manberg, but ultimately it was upsetting to both of them. techno felt betrayed because he genuinely thought tommy was his friend, only to be turned on last minute once again, now surrounded alone by enemies he was trying to protect tommy from. to him, allying with dream was just as bad as tommy allying with l’manberg. a betrayal for a betrayal, absolute reciprocity.
we all know the doomsday speech, with techno’s arguments being consistently stronger than tommy’s and much easier to defend, but we can’t just dismiss him. tommy had a lot of emotional input that day, and was angry at techno for a Lot of reasons, so he was more focused on shouting than making sense. he was more accusatory, while techno had fairly focused rebuttals (which, fair, i’m pretty sure that was techno’s first big addressal of most of that with other characters). it ended with tommy calling techno selfish for destroying l’manberg and techno coldly shutting tommy out for the betrayal.
betrayal was the driving force for techno’s “weapon” speech. tommy used him in pogtopia, tried to use him to stop dream exiling him and terrorising NLM) which he laughed at when told in character) and used him for getting the discs back. tommy wasn’t just using him, he genuinely felt like they had built a relationship beyond that, but when techno acted under his own ideals that went against his, then it was over. because tommy doesn’t value techno’s ideals, because they’re ‘selfish’ to him since he’s one of the only ones who believes in them. in turn techno sees that as making tommy selfish and as such they’re unable to compromise.
living with techno was an important part of tommy’s recovery process, which is still ongoing now. he saw immediate changes from his time with dream, claiming he felt “more me-ey” around techno and genuinely valuing his company. but he viewed techno’s alliance with dream as a betrayal, and he viewed the nov 16th incident as a betrayal. because he see’s techno’s belief in anarchy as selfish. something i never hear people point out is that tommy ADMITS he betrayed techno. after doomsday*, he says “all this time, technoblade told me i was betraying him. and you know what? (whispered) i was.” he’s guilty about it, and he understands that techno’s hurt. but he still can’t see him as being in the right, because techno took l’manberg forcefully and violently, and because tommy was hurt by their separation too. techno was powered by revenge more than anarchy during doomsday, which i think is important to point out. tommy had focused in on the threat of dream, and forgotten all the trauma techno went through with l’manberg, and left techno to rejoin l’manberg.
BOTH of them have explicitly stated “i viewed him as a friend but he never viewed me as one” and that’s just... devastating. at one point we can only hope that they have an in-canon conversation to actually settle all of this, but for now their storylines are separate and we’ll just have to live with that.
if anyone has anything they’d like to ask/clarify, or additions from any side i’d love to see it bc character analysis of dsmp characters is what’s keeping me going rn lmao. i said betrayal so many times here i am very sorry for clogging up the tag bc my readmore isn’t working yet (edit SAVED)
*i actually think this speech from tommy is very important, and not looked at as much as other stuff so im gonna link it here [55:52].
#technoblade#tommyinnit#dsmp#mcyt#bedrock bros#dsmp analysis#my readmore isn’t working sad face#can you tell im done with one sided discourse? i just can’t cope with black and white accusations they are all so so flawed#people are entitled to their opinions but sometimes it is just character bashing#the victim complex accusation rots my brain almost as much as people critising how c!techno shows emotions bc folks.... COME ON#if this is coherent i will be AMAZED because i should have focused on either pogtopia era or exile era#i don’t understand mcyttwt because this would be like five threads they have no room to argue anything how do they live#long post#my metas#if this post flops i will be devastated bc then i can’t justify procrastinating 2 essays#sbi#sleepy boys inc
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Fix your eyes and get up // Bo Sinclair x Almond
Summary: You've been hurt one too many times by a very close friend of yours and on this night, you just want someone else to take care of you. Just for once. Just for a change. Bo is an asshole, everyone knows it, but he's not THAT much of an asshole, and he's there for you even before you know that you need him to be... it's what puts him a cut above the rest.
A/N: written for @houseofdabs 🥺 I hope that you feel better soon, Almond! Know you're loved & you deserve better.🌸💗She/they pronouns used (I used your bio & stalked your blog for some info👀)
TW; friendship conflict (unresolved in the piece) between reader & a nameless faceless friend they have, swearing (in the narrative bc I'm a sailor I guess lmfao), reader has a complicated romantic relationship with Bo (took inspo from some of Almond's tags).
Word count: 1, 517.
You didn't like to cry in front of others, so you just didn't.
It didn't matter how upset you were. You could have the absolute worst sickly lump in your throat, the most horrible ache in your jaw from clenching it in an effort to keep yourself from crying out, a stinging in the back of your nose and in your eyes, and you would not cry.
Not until you were alone.
It was one of the things which Bo most admired about you; your ability to go on no matter how badly you were feeling. That didn't mean that he liked it when you were upset, because he didn't. He fucking hated it and so often he caught himself wanting to kill whatever or whomever was upsetting you so, but he knew well from a lifetime of trying to do the same that emotions couldn't be killed. They could only be channelled, they could only be paid attention to and put at ease by being expressed in whichever way they asked you to. Bo couldn't kill your emotions and he wouldn't want to, either, because that would take away from who you were and he didn't want to do that.
Bo loved you so much that it hurt him in the best of ways and most of all, he admired you for your capacity for kindness and goodness no matter what. Kindness wasn't easy; it was a deliberate and conscious choice which had to be made each and every time there was an opportunity for it, but that was where its power lay. Of the world had Bo only seen Ambrose and yet he knew how cold and callous it could be, how underhanded and awful humans could be, but you were like a light to him with the way you loved like your life depended on it.
People gravitated towards you for that. You were the mum friend, the one who would drop what you were doing to listen to other people, suspecting that they wouldn't do the same for you in your hour of need but hoping for such all the same. Even friends you had known for years, friends who you seemed to speak to only in a pattern of a few months at a time, treated you like that, and Bo absolutely hated to see you beaten and downtrodden by those who ought to have known better. In Bo's world, a favour handed out was a favour owed, and he considered these people whom you spoke to on a regular basis to owe you the same kindnesses you had always and without thought given to them.
Alas, Bo's world was Ambrose; he very rarely properly left town and he had certainly never gone further than just a few towns over, so his worldview was very rarely reflective of the world that you knew. You had not lived such a sheltered life (though Bo was not naive; he had seen more of the world and its cruelties than any person ever should, let alone at so young an age) and you knew that things didn't always work that way. A healthy, genuine friendship was give and take, with each person deciding every day to put in as much effort as they wanted to in order to maintain the friendship and to remain in the other person's lives. But Bo hadn't ever really known friendship - you weren't his first friend (that honour went to his brothers, and definitely Vincent more so than Lester), and so when he came home this night to find you torn up and upset over the way one of your friends had been treating you, he was livid.
Bo wasn't an idiot. He was emotionally intelligent, and he only needed one look at you to understand that you were upset. He suspected that it was because of some troubles with your friends - this wasn't the first time it had happened, and it sure as shit wouldn't be the last, much to his annoyance - and so he kept his posture casual despite the undercurrent of ice in his eyes and in his tone. "Wha's bitin' at'cha, darlin'?" He moved through the front door, closing it behind him before he took off his boots, his baseball cap, and his outer jacket. The boots and cap were haphazardly discarded to the floor, but the jacket was hung up on the rack and his keys were chucked into the wooden bowl on the sideboard.
You sighed, "It's my friends."
Bo scoffed and mumbled, "I figured." He meant it not as an insult, only to say that he recognised the patterns of your upset. This seemed to happen every few months and he was as sick of it as you were. You deserved better, Bo knew, but he couldn't make your choices for you. He could only comfort you and support you in his own way.
You shot him a glare, his tone sharper than either of you would have liked, but he shrugged with one shoulder, as if to apologise despite the fact that you both knew he didn't mean it and you continued. "I'm just so embarrassed to have feelings, Bo. It's like, I'm always there for everyone, especially my friend who I've known for years now, but people never reciprocate the gesture and I'm tired of it. I know it shouldn't be done just to get it back, that's not how being there for people works, but... I just wish one person just once would be there for me the way I am for them."
Bo gave you a long, heavy look as he reached the sofa. In one fluid, confident movement which told truths of how many times he had sat down with you like this, so comfortable was he, he sat down beside you and slung an arm around your shoulder, his fingers splaying across your upper arm as he pulled you into his side. This was to be a serious conversation and you readied yourself for the unpredictable chaos that was Bo Sinclair (and, oh, how you loved him as much as you hated him). "Y'mean... like m'here for ya' right now, huh?" He raised a strong dark eyebrow at you challengingly and your breath caught in your throat. Fuck, he was always so intense.
Your irritation with your friend was smoothed somewhat by Bo's words and you smiled. It was a sad smile, but a smile nonetheless and Bo considered that a win. "Yeah, like you... honestly, you and your brothers are the only people who're always here, whether you know it or not." Bo's mouth turned downwards and you sunk a bit deeper into his side. He cursed under his breath and tugged you closer to him as he nosed your dark hair out of the way and rested his forehead against the junction between the warm column of your neck and your shoulder.
"I got'cha, Almond, promise. Me and m'brothers are always gonna' be 'ere for yer. Ain't nothin' like family, even when we fight." Bo chuckled, a sound tinged in hysteria which made you wince as much as it made you laugh, so dual was Bo. Warm, soft lips pressed kisses to the skin it was closest to and Bo's arms wrapped even tighter around you. It was an awkward hug given that you were sat down beside each other but Bo somehow made it work; just as he did with everything he set out to do. "I hope yer know y'deserve better'n that, darlin'. Ain't right, how they treat'cha given all the things y'do for 'em. Don't matter if's once or twice," Bo shook his head, running out of words but wanting you to understand. "S'not right. Should fuckin' know better."
There was Bo's worldview again. You always took it with a pinch of salt, though you understood the core of what he was saying and it did cheer you up. You were worth more, loved more, than the way your friends made you feel sometimes, but even if they couldn't or wouldn't always see it, Bo absolutely would, and he would always be there to remind you of that.
"I don't mind it," You shrugged. Bo gave you an incredulous scoff. "I don't! I just wish people would return the favour, you know? I'm so used to being there for others but so rarely is someone there for me, and it hurts." You shrugged but Bo saw what you were stopping yourself from saying. He tipped his head back and pressed a tender, lingering kiss to your temple. He had very little left to say, which was just as well because he figured showing you that he was there for you was better than saying something he already had.
"I get it, darlin'," Bo shrugged this time but you knew he was telling the truth. He meant what he said and said what he meant, "How 'bout y'jus' sit 'ere wit' me an' we watch sumthin' together? Y'can talk or whatever y'want, jus' stay wit' me. I got'cha."
He did, and he does.
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𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤
𝔰𝔥𝔦𝔫𝔰𝔬𝔲 𝔥𝔦𝔱𝔬𝔰𝔥𝔦 ᥊ 𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯
𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: you find yourself in a bar that you and your ex used to go to regularly. the local bartender calls your ex- shinsou hitoshi; thinking you guys are still together.
𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝘁𝗮𝗴𝘀: angst to fluff (happy ending), sfw, pro hero au (aged up), drinking (alcohol mentions and intake) ex to lovers, minor todomomo (not the center of this fic) reader is in the top 5, some swearing.
𝗹𝗲𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗱: [Y/N = your name, L/N = last name, H/N = hero name, ] f! reader, quirk not mentioned.
𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀: i also did this trope on ao3 with todomomo, so i better not see people think i plagiarized them because.. that’s literally me lol. also! i was very conflicted, bc i also wanted to do this with shouto but since I already have 2-3 fics in the making, i went with hitoshi (but let me know if you wanna see shouto’s version.)
word count to be added when im not sleep deprived
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˚✧₊⁎⁎⁺˳✧༚
You swivel down another shot down your throat, not caring of the burn in your nose, nor do you care about the smell of the alcohol.
You’re never like this, this is not the best representation of yourself, no. This is not who you are as a person, and the way your former classmates look at you with concern when you chug down another shot shows how unusual this is to them.
“Take it easy..” Momo pats your back, and you exhale heavily, putting down the glass. Everyone is certain that you’ll obtain some serious hangover, almost to the point that you’d have to take the morning off to treat your hangover. They’re aware that you’re not this careless, since you're in the top 5 after all.
But they let you be momentarily, but why you may ask?
Because this is your way of coping a breakup with your boyfriend of 3 and a half years, Shinsou Hitoshi. They’re aware on how hurt you really are, and to be real- they were the ones that asked you to come out with them tonight to distract you.
“They’ve been going at it for a while, it’s almost concerning.” Tsuyu comments, as she tends to a slightly tipsy Mina, holding her so she doesn’t fall face first into the floor.
The least they could do is let you be, while you're not totally blacked out.
The local bartender- Maki, looks at you with concern when you order another shot, yet they still give it to you (with the slightest hesitation) since you’re such a good friend to her. (Your rank makes you very respectable, it’s almost intimidating! but your casual friend ship with the bar tender says other wise.)
But on the contrary, you'd know when you’ve reached the limit, and you’d probably know when they’d start refusing your requests of another shot.
One by one, their friends depart from the table, either they were too drunk to even handle it so they were brought home, or something came up- everyone could agree that they all had some sort of worry towards their dear friend’s very out of character coping mechanism.
“I have to go soon,” Momo sighs, when she receives a text from Todoroki- though it’s very obvious that she’s still very concerned for you, considering that she’s the only friend left. “Please take care of Y/N, Maki-san.”
Maki nods at your black haired friend, and the creation hero looks at you one last time before leaving the bar.
Lifting your head, your words are slurred as you request for another shot, which seems like the umpteenth time that you requested for a shot. The concerned bartender still attends to your needs, yet- she’s contemplating of calling someone if you ask for another.
Likewise, you finish that shot in a moment, and you slump down on the table. Eyelids fluttering slowly as your laughter is filled with intoxication, your cheeks are warm from being inebriated from the intake of alcohol.
You don’t notice how your concerned bartender dials up a number, requesting for them to pick your drunken state.
»»————- ➴ ————-««
“Did you know the word bed is shaped like one?”
It’s now past midnight, and you’re mouthing off about something random, the train of thought is endless (but it’s more like a shower thought ramble.) Your fists are deep into your hair- holding your head up so it doesn't hit the table, meanwhile Maki paces back and forth- still tending to other requests from the very few customers left.
“Now that you’ve mentioned it, yeah.” They answer absentmindedly, “Man, I haven't seen you in nearly 4 months! it’s been a while. You knows how to hold your alcohol so frankly, this is the first time I’ve seen this side of you!”
“Oh really?” You slur, continuing on to spout out purposeless words.
The bartender’s response is a total blur, words turning into background noises, and a part of you is lucky to still be conscious and still functioning (yet it's barely)
“..But you hold it well for--”
You’re also very lucky that you’re a little too under the influence to even register the name.
You didn't know you’d take this breakup with him harshly. The most you were expecting was just.. crying while eating ice cream.
But no, it was an utter shit hole.
The door busts open, and the bartender’s expression seems to brighten up “Ah, there you are!”
You grumble, the bar’s lights causing your eyes to sting- and your head hurts too. You might need some aspirin later.. you close your eyes shut. The bartender is chatting with the unknown person, and frankly- you just wished you didn’t intoxicate yourself this much.
“Y/N,”
The baritone voice is almost sufficient in sobering you up. Turning to the familiar voice, you see the tall figure, sporting bedraggled purple hair.
It’s Shinsou Hitoshi. A reason why you’re in such a mess, coping with a breakup in the first place.
You almost fall off your chair in sudden revelation to the appearance of your ex lover. It was almost like.. your drunken state was making you see things- a possible hallucination maybe? it has to be that. Maybe it’s the side effect of the growing headache?? What was in that shot?
“Ugh, I must be crazy,” You wipe your cheek from slob, your head throbbing from the growing headache. The weary purple head raises an eyebrow, and the bartender is confused by the sudden tension. It's abnormal, alright.
The reason why you broke up was because of his lack of self care.
Again, it’s not like he was being a shithead and cheating on you, or being a total prick of a boyfriend and neglecting you, and it’s definitely not the other way around either.
It was probably the opposite. He'd neglect himself for days on end, not caring about himself, and not caring about his own being. It was.. not what you wanted at all.
You figured just because the both of you are rising up heroes, and also adults- he would’ve gotten a grip of not neglecting himself.
But even habits like that don’t get old.
“Hitoshi- seriously, when was the last time you’ve took a breather?” growing slightly irritated by Shinsou’s continuous neglect of his own self care, and also the fact that he’s clinging onto you 24/7.
“It doesn’t matter.” He shrugs, pinching your cheek. Heck, you should be glad he wants to be with you for the majority of the days. But you can’t tolerate him when he’s constantly complaining about being tired, although making little to no efforts in taking care of himself. Heck- his dark circles got even darker- how is that even possible?
“’Toshi, it really does. You can’t neglect self care.” Your brows furrow when he chooses to ignore your words. “You’re not listening to me.”
“You should be glad that I want to spend time with you.”
It stung. What the hell did he even mean by that..?? scoffing, and slightly offended, you reply “That’s not the main issue.” you cross your arms “We’ve talked about this before, remember?” You reason out, giving him the nice benefit of the doubt. You'd like to be civil here.
He ignores you once more, and you can actually feel the irritation grow within you. “I don’t want to be the reason why you neglect yourself.”
“I’m really not, okay?” He retorts back, “Why do you always have to bring up things that don't matter?”
Aggitated, you snap back “Wh- we’re talking about you! Hitoshi, we’ve talked about this- and you said you’d work on it! do my words mean nothing to you?” Hitoshi’s gaze flickers up, only staring at you, as if it was his own way of judging you and your intent.
And that’s how it erupted into a full fight, and into your eventual breakup.
You didn’t know how expressing your genuine concern for him blended into him saying things he’d never mean in his entire life. He doesn’t stop you when you walk out, not saying a thing at all
There was no verbal breakup. It was just.. there.
The unknowing bartender interrupts the nonverbal tension, “I thought you’d be a lot happier, y’know.”
“We-”
“..’ll get going now, thanks again.” Before you know it, Hitoshi’s hooking your arm around his shoulders— as he walks to the door, leaving the very familiar bar.
It’s awkward, surely. You’re not sure why he was there, and you’re not so sure as to why he decided to come to your aid in the first place. If Maki called him, and he was requested to come to you in question, then he could’ve just..
“..sent someone else,” You mumble. You reek heavily of alcohol, and your skin is undeniably warm. Frankly, he doesn’t remember the last time you were like this— was it the first time you had a drink? it was years back at this point.
You’re pretty.
Beautiful,
That’s one thing that hasn’t change. Surely, what changed things was the fact that he said some.. horrible things— and refused to even listen to your concerns, which ultimately cause your breakup. His relationship status changed into some lonely and young hero, and his heart ached in different ways.
But you’re still very beautiful, to him.
Doesn’t matter if you’re all dolled up for a hero interview, or a mess on a off saturday. You’re still beautiful.
But now— he’s focused on your words, and he’s taken aback when you continue to speak, causing the both of you to stop in the middle of the sidewalk.
“You’ve coulda asked s-someone else to pick.. me up.” Your words are slurred, a normal side effect of being drunk. However, seeing your ex has surely sobered you up.
“That’s true,” Shinsou moves to continue walking, so you guys weren’t standing on the middle of the side walk on a cold early morning.
“What are you even doing at a bar at 1am?” He changes the subject, but you’re still caught on to your previous question. “You didn’t answer my question at all, meanie.” Her grip is firm, so there’s no way of budging it.
His laugh lacks humor, yet he feels obligated to answer her. Or else they’d be stuck on the sidewalk, due to her hero grip.
“It didn’t feel right,”
“Yeah sure.” You grumble, “Because you suddenly care.”
“I’ve always cared, Y/N.”
“Really?” You say, not really believing him anyway. “You seemed pretty sure with your words back then to care.” Despite being toxicated, your words have undertones of venom
“You may say that, but.. I’ve always cared.”
“Then why the hell did you say all of that back then, huh?” Overwhelmed by seeing your ex, who you still fucking loved by the way— tears grow at your eyes. “If you’re lying, stop it.” You say, literally not in the mood to be lied to right now.
You’re literally being carried by your ex, while intoxicated, while also having a throbbing headache.
“I’m not.” Hitoshi answers firmly. A certain edge grows in his throat, and he hates it.
“Yes you are,” Your voice is now wobbly, it’s really just a mix of your overwhelming emotion, as well as your drunken state. “You would’ve told me that weeks ago!”
You were always right, and he knows it. Ever since from the last moment you shared with him, your words were just.. nothing but the sheer truth. Yet, he’s only hurt you— because of his denial.
He knows you’re right, and he knows that he had his habits of neglecting his own care. Though that’s why he decided to change, that you were in fact- correct all this time.
And he was just an ass to even admit it.
“You’re right,” His fists crumple, grip tight as he fights his sudden urge to break. “You were always right. I’ve always cared, and you’ve always cared about me. Yet I was worried of changing, not being around you just so that I could take care of something that’s not really important-”
“But you are, Hitoshi,” You sob, nearly collapsing onto the ground— “You matter so much, yet you don’t even see it, and if I’m going to contribute to your destructive ways— then...”
“How could you? If you don’t care about my words, then do you care about yourself..?”
Shinsou sighs, bending down to meet your level— you’re gasping and sobbing into his chest, tears angrily running down your cheeks.
“I know, kitten, and I’m sorry.” Wiping your tears with his thumb, he speaks once more. “That’s why.. I’ve thought about what you’ve said, and I decided to take care of myself a bit more, I want you to know that.. I do care.”
You glance up at him, the city lights luminating his face— enough for you to see the adorning expression he’s sporting.
“..really?” You speak, in a nearly hush tone, again— you’re still very drunk, and overwhelmed with emotions. This could’ve been passed off as a fever dream, and you could’ve been normal with it.
“Yes, Y/N.” His mouth perks up into a small smile.
“Then.. would you allow me to start over with you again?”
Pushing against Hitoshi, you envelope him with your arms— it’s almost cliché and dramatic, the way you collapse into his arms like it’s the last day on earth.
But.. Shinsou’s glad he has you again. Finally a chance to prove that he’s changed.
ーーーーーーー
BONUS
You sit on the counter of your apartment, hands covering your face— as a way to shield your eyes from the prodding sunlight that peaks from the windows.
“This should help,” Hitoshi hands you a cool glass of water, “The way you hold your alcohol is terrible,” You chug down the glass of water, and you take a jab at him with your feet.
He hisses at the sudden attack, and only chuckles, “You’re mad because it’s true kitten,” He teases
“Shut up,” You draw him in with your leg, setting the glass down, “Just kiss me already,”
And so he does, pressing your lips against his— savoring the sweet warm moment he’s been practically starved of for nearly 4 months.
He pulls back, his expression showcasing that he’s tasting the aftermath.
“Ew, you taste like beer.”
You glare at him, and take another light jab, “Of course I do, Idiot.”
Despite saying all of that, he pulls you in once more.
˚✧₊⁎❝᷀ົཽ ❝᷀ົཽ⁎⁺˳✧༚
likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading (literally the first fic i’ve ever posted, so y’all BETTER like it or i’ll 💀)
i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing
do not plagiarize my work :)) (literally don’t, it’s 3:26am on a tuesday.)
#shinsou fluff#shinsou x reader#bnha imagines#bnha x reader#mha x reader#mha imagines#bnha x y/n#bnha fluff#shinsou imagines#shinsou hitoshi fanfiction#shinsou hitoshi x you#shinsou hitoshi x y/n#bnha angst#bnha fanfic#mha fanfiction#mha x you#mha x y/n#my hero academia shinsou#shinsou bnha#shinsou hitoshi#istg if this flops#shinsou x you#shinsou x y/n#if this flops i’ll actually cry#shinsou hitoshi x reader
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i have many feelings and probably unpopular opinions/views on the bee duo-las nevadas conflict today so here we go, all characters mentions are c! only!
(mostly c!tubbo analysis i’m sorry)
while yes, quackity has every right to be suspicious of the outpost especially when it really was designed to spy on his country, tubbo also has every right to build there. because quackity never specified he was going to expand on that land. more so, tubbo had every right to be suspicious of las nevadas and want to see what’s going on, because he himself knows just how incredibly dangerous new things on the smp can be.
tubbo obviously wants to trust quackity and believe there’s nothing sketchy going on in las nevada’s, but there’s so much history between them that’s left some serious, albeit unnoticeable, tension against quackity (and most of the server)
he himself said that it was quackity who took part in tubbo’s execution. while many tend to just blame schlatt and techno, most people forget that quackity had so much to do with it as well. while yes, tubbo has forgiven him, who’s to say tubbo isn’t still effected by it. we all know how horrible he is when it comes to expression his emotions/trauma, and his nonchalant attitude towards his own life may come into effect as well.
as well as, while tubbo was president, it was quackity who took charge and bossed tubbo around the most. HE spoke over tubbo, and HE was the one comparing him to schlatt, their shared tormentor during the manburg arc. quackity had to have known how much that would hurt. quackity also suggested execution ranboo just before doomsday, an example of how he had no problem executing tubbo before. quackity is known to manipulate tubbo and put words into his mouth, with how much “i trust you, BUT (insert negative)” quackity threw. quackity also tried to leave l’manburg on doomsday, which obviously hurt tubbo even if he did come back. tubbo standing up to quackity when he felt entirely justified building onto an apparently unclaimed piece of land wasn’t tubbo having any negative intentions or violent thoughts, it was only a teenager who was tired of being bullied and walked all over.
tubbo has every right to be afraid of what quackity in las nevada’s could do. building a spy outpost and calling it a cookie stand is how tubbo, who’s known to go to the extremes when feeling threatened, is entirely justified. because tubbo is afraid of his own projects getting griefed, as demonstrated in the past, him making the outpost so secure is, in tubbo’s traumatized mind, entirely justified. and i agree.
quackity is in his every right to be suspicious and untrusting with the outpost, but he is in no way innocent of tricking people himself. tubbo’s river compromise was completely reasonable.
as well as, i truly believe if quackity had tried talking to the bee duo before instantly starting to build a wall against the other wall, the conflict wouldn’t have been to negative. tubbo felt threatened by the immediate distrust and assumption that they were out to harm las nevadas, when he just wanted to keep an eye out and stay close to people he’s afraid of, to avoid someone else getting hurt. quackity feeling threatened by a supposed cookie store in territory he didn’t officially claim, where the wall wasn’t even being built directly towards las nevadas, felt a bit too extreme.
also, the way quackity would say things like “i’ll ALLOW you to keep the farm” “if you’d asked permission first” and bringing up so much politics, law and terms felt like an adult undermining a child, like he didn’t actually respect tubbo as a person. i’ve noticed a pattern of certain adults treating the minors of the smp as adults who should take the blame for problems that aren’t even their own and then treating them like clueless kids who don’t know what they’re talking about when it’s convenient for them. quackity during tubbo’s presidency, while treating him like a child, put all of the pressure and decisions on him instead of owning up to his own issues. quackity just doesn’t sit right with me, he and wilbur both being extreme manipulators and picking/choosing when they want to treat one of the kids with respect feels incredibly shitty. ALSO also, the fact that quackity kept bringing up jack manifold and associating all of his actions to tubbo also feels very uncomfortable. judging a person by association is toxic and biased, especially since quackity only believed jack manifold to live in snowchester- a place that has been, and tubbo has made this very clear, somewhere that people can go to relax and live peacefully, and conflict-free. tubbo let’s anyone build and reside in snowchester not for money or profit or power, but because he knows there are people on the server who’re tired of feeling threatened. tubbo is in no way responsible for the actions of others associated with him or his home. quackity really liked forgetting that foolish and puffy lived there as well, both of which he trusts (or manipulated into joining las nevadas, moreso foolish, as i’m not too sure where puffy lies).
speaking of foolish, i am :D not okay :D bc i love foolish, he’s my sweet shark god but with how carefree he was about giving away all of snowchester secrets to quackity when tubbo clearly trusted him and welcomed him with open/warm arms, it hurted :���D if quackity finds out about michael because of foolish, and in turn something happens to michael, i will lose it-
i’m not entirely sure what quackity is planning with las nevadas, especially since he’s trying revive schlatt as well, but it isn’t anything good. tubbo has every right to be suspicious. quackity obviously believed that he would be able to take over the conversation and sound like he was in the right/being fair the entire time, and speak over tubbo like always. he tried to as well, and tried to put words into tubbo’s mouth yet again. for someone who’s so obsessed with not repeating history, he definitely loves to let it control him. i’m proud of tubbo for standing his ground.
people assume history will repeat itself, but it only will if you let it take over. quackity wanting las nevadas to not see the fate of l’manburg is going to be its downfall, because quackity didn’t actually learn from history. he’s letting it control him.
#mcyt#tubbo#/roleplay#dream smp#tommyinnit#dream#ranboo#las nevadas#lore#quackity#foolish gamers#foolishg#michael beloved#character analysis#i have feelings
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April 25: ribbons
A Swan Maiden Fairy Tale Fusion
Lan Wangji is a huntsman who happens upon a pond in the woods. He sees this epic coat thing made from raven feathers on the banks and goes “wow this is so cool and so pretty i should give it to my brother” and picks it up. Then he sees this guy on the shore and freaks out wondering if he’s dead, but he’s not, he’s just unconscious & naked. So Lan Wangji wraps him up and brings him home, because he’s nice. Then the guy wakes up, introduces himself as “wei ying, courtesy wuxian”, sees the feather cloak and says “nice…cloak you got there”
“it is a gift for my brother”
“ah. Right…when’s ur brother getting here?”
“i will visit him when the snow melts”
“k. Cool. guess im staying here until then”
“can you not go home?”
Wei Wuxian eyes crinkle like he’s sharing a private joke: “Not until the snow melts”
Lan Wangji is a good host and doesn’t know how he feels about this guy just declaring that he’ll live with him for the next several months but…okay.
Lan Wangji finds out very quickly that Wei Wuxian isn’t normal, and it doesn't take him long after that to guess that Wei Wuxian also isn’t entirely human. He’s a very bad houseguest, he just sits, doesn’t know how to cook or anything really, and talks at Lan Wangji while Lan Wangji makes them breakfast. He follows Lan Wangji everywhere he goes with no explanation, just invites himself along. He talks while Lan Wangji is trying to hunt but somehow that doesn’t scare away the game. He flinched the first time Lan Wangji’s arrow found a mark, and insisted on honoring the fallen bird before returning. He passes time whistling and carves himself a flute, they play duets and Lan Wangji finds himself composing something on his guqin in the early morning while Wei Wuxian is still asleep on the floor. Wei Wuxian introduces him to spice, which he hates, but watching Wei Wuxian’s face light up isn’t something he thinks he can ever get tired of.
Wei Wuxian talks a lot about his home and his family, which is apparently a port by a river delta, which is how Lan Wangji learns that Wei Wuxian a very good swimmer, like everyone else there, and that he and his brother are constantly pushing each other in the lake, that he goes out to the pier to drink at night, that he has the best big sister who makes lotus and pork rib soup and stops Wei Wuxian from fighting with his brother, who is an angery smol one but also the best little brother ever (how this is possible, Lan Wangji doesn’t know, it’s clear Wei Wuxian loves his brother even if he spends most of the time making fun of him)
Lan Wangji doesn’t understand why Wei Wuxian can’t return to this home he’s heard so much about, doesn’t know why he found Wei Wuxian abandoned & naked by the side of the pond, but decides that Wei Wuxian is magic and it’s a magic pond, and if his family would leave him in that state, they don’t deserve him. He works up the courage to ask “wei ying. When the snow melts. Stay with me.” and Wei Wuxian is Conflicted bc he likes Lan Wangji and would like to stay but hates that he has to and maybe won’t see his family ever again. In the end all he says is “okay” and Lan Wangji is Very Happy. He also sees Wei Wuxian eyeing the feather cloak often but he already said he’d give it to his brother and doesn’t know how to offer it to Wei Wuxian. But then Wei Wuxian says “guess you’re not giving it to your brother now” which is basically how Lan Wangji thinks Wei Wuxian asks for things so he just nods vaguely.
Wei Wuxian guesses pretty early that Lan Wangji doesn’t know the full extent of what he’s done, and he clearly doesn’t know who Wei Wuxian is, but that’s not surprising. He decides not to tell him, because why would he? On the off-chance that Lan Wangji will just...give it back to him? Wei Wuxian has heard the Swan Maiden tale, he's has seen the worst parts of humanity; he can’t trust that.
It’s been raining a lot recently, which means Lan Wangji has less opportunity to hunt, and it’s harder to hunt after rain. He goes to the nearest town to trade when his supplies get too low (Wei Wuxian comes with obviously) and there the gossip is that some villagers swear up and down that they saw purple lightning (Wei Wuxian isn’t surprised, just sighs and says “of course”) which means that Sandu Shengshou is angry! And that the Lady of Lotus Blossoms, who usually blesses typical goddess things like matchmaking and fertility/childbirth, has 1) stopped and 2) started leaving white lotus blossoms behind, which means that she’s mourning which is sad and terrible! (Wei Wuxian agrees that her being sad is terrible and gets misty-eyed. Lan Wangji wasn’t aware that Wei Wuxian held her in such high regard).
In town, Wei Wuxian gets Lan Wangji better deals, flirts with some girls which makes Lan Wangji sad for unknown reasons, gets harassed by some guys which is how Lan Wangji confirms that Wei Wuxian is not human/magic bc in the dark & rainy night his eyes looked red and his teeth in the moonlight looked too long and too sharp, and no one heard from Wen Chao again. Lan Wangji also buys him clothes
The snow melts. Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian set off to visit Lan Xichen. Wei Wuxian isn’t wearing the cloak and Lan Wangji doesn’t understand why? But doesn’t ask because he never does. They get to the lake where Lan Wangji found Wei Wuxian and wait for Lan Xichen to meet them there, meanwhile Wei Wuxian hisses at a peacock and talks to a sparrow (Lan Wangji doesn’t question it. He never does), then Lan Xichen arrives and at the same time purple lightning flashes and a young man descends from the sky dressed in rich purple silks followed by a lady dressed in lavender and rose pink. they’re easily recognizable as Sandu Shengshou, the Lord of the heavenly Lotus Pier, and the Lady of Lotus Blossoms, his sister and the Lady of Lotus Pier. Lan Xichen is like “wangji wtf is going on” meanwhile Jiang Cheng accuses Lan Wangji of kidnapping his brother, and Jiang Yanli is like “we’re willing to bargain for our brother back. what do you want?”
Lan Wangji: "If he’s ur brother why did you abANDON him"
Jiang Cheng: "how DARE we’ve been searching for him for MONTHS ever since you TOOK him"
"i found him abandoned so i took him home to PROTECT him"
"that’s a fancy way of saying you decided to keep him like an exotic pet"
"i did no such thing"
"then why did you keep that!?" Jiang Cheng points at the feather cloak and everyone looks
Lan Xichen: "oh no"
Lan Wangji: "what"
Lan Xichen: "wangji. the swan maiden"
Lan Wangji: *remembers the story about the swan maiden who left her swan feathers by the side of the pond while she bathed and the huntsman who took her feathers and thus took her, forced her to marry him and bear him three children, before she found her feathers, after which she yeeted outta there with her three children and never left the heavens again, leaving huntsman to die of a broken heart.*
Lan Wangji hadn’t even considered it, maybe because Wei Wuxian was sleeping and therefore didn’t beg for the feather cloak back, maybe bc he made a weak joke instead of flat-out asking Lan Wangji what he planned to do, maybe because his wasn’t pure and white but rather made of raven feathers and pitch black
Also Wei Wuxian got roaring drunk that’s how he ended up there. Jiang Cheng is like “just bc my brother is the stupidest dumb person to ever idiot–” “hey!” “does not mean you can just taKE ADVANTAGE of him”
Anyway Lan Wangji freaks tf out and practically throws the feather cloak back at Wei Wuxian, who hasn’t been meeting his eyes and not saying anything this whole time and tries to apologize. Jiang Yanli grabs it and her brother and walks into the lake, pink and cream lotus blossoms blooming under her feet; she doesn’t sink under the surface. She stands in the middle and they both go under. Then Wei Wuxian arises in his full black-and-red glory, Jiang Cheng shoots Lan Wangji one last glare and then the three of them promptly disappear into the heavens
Lan Xichen holds Lan Wangji for the first time in years while he cries. He stutters his way through an explanation of what happened the past three months, saying again and again that he didn’t know, he noticed that Wei Wuxian wasn’t human and a little bit magic but he didn’t expect this and he didn’t realize that he was preventing Wei Wuxian from leaving. Lan Xichen says things like “i believe you” and “you’re not a terrible person, you just made a terrible mistake”
Eventually Lan Wangji stops hyperventilating, and that’s when a flock of crows leaves their roosts, the wind shrieks, and Wei Wuxian descends again. Lan Wangji doesn’t understand how Wei Wuxian could possibly forgive him, or how someone like Wei Wuxian could possibly take interest in a lonely huntsman like Lan Wangji, but Wei Wuxian holds his hand out and says that he promised to take Lan Wangji on a tour of his home (lotus pier!!), and his eyes do that thing and he says “well? Are you coming?” and how can Lan Wangji say no?
#antebunny's april prompts#spring fest 2021#mdzs#wangxian#fairy tale au#fic outline#if you ask what this has to do with ribbons i will Smite you
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Dearest treasure | KTH
|PART 1| |PART 2| |PART 3|
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/7fdbca0c8c095452eb09bc6fc6107820/e06853f6c8a0cacf-4a/s540x810/bf7d35302f7d41a8ee92858d5e0d1f94b5910906.jpg)
Summary: Every kid in town was afraid of Kang Taehyun, the old -slightly creepy- man living alone for years and years in the same run down house. Every night he would go into his backyard with a shovel and dig a hole into the earth. No one knows why and there are kids rumouring about him burying people. Jungwon was a bright kid, wanting to find out the truth behind this widely spread rumour for a school project. And what he found out would change his life forever.
Genre: fluff, angst, flashbacks, story of life, snippets of life, tiny bit humour
Warning: old Taehyun, mention of death, mention of suicide/suicidal thoughts, death
Word count: 10152 (all 3 parts together)
Pairing: Kang Taehyun x reader, (Yang Jungwon)
Note: Wow okay so this story took me a while to write and I listened to hours of das music to finish this🥺 this was honestly an emotional rollercoaster. But I’m so glad it’s finally finished so I can post it on here yayyy!!! I hope you like it an enjoooyy (please tell me if you cried I would really appreciate your responses haha bc I did)
Main Masterlist
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/585e7ec639b4084778c58ec1efca8aab/e06853f6c8a0cacf-96/s540x810/38a02a10a79e487243dabbfb39c1625a0a5f614e.jpg)
2089 (present)
Jungwon took a glance down towards the camera clasped tightly in the palm of his hand. With a heavy breath, his eyes slowly moved up to the big house in front of him. Former white paint - now a dirty grey almost everywhere - was already peeling itself from the walls, dozens of thick ivy tendrils sneaking up to the dirty windows and even further. It looked just like the old spooky houses, Jungwon had secretly seen in horror movies his parents were watching. And it especially felt like it as well.
The cold wind was slowly whirling around the dead leaves on the ground, freeing the view to numerous mounds of earth spreading over the whole front yard and probably even backyard. Some were fresher than the others. Some were older than the others.
Jungwon could feel a wave of goosebumps hushing over his body, clearly not only being the cold winds fault. With one last reassuring nod to himself, he courageously made its way over the small path through the chaotic front yard towards the old wooden front door.
It had terrified him when he was a bit younger to even lay eyes on this house, let alone go any near it, and quite truthfully, Jungwon still felt a tiny wave of fear coming through. He had heard many things around this neighbourhood and school...creepy theories as to why the old man living inside this house was seen digging holes in his garden. From murder to even paranormal activities, everything was possible, referring one of the older kids at school, Park Jongseong, who tended to love scaring innocent young students with these stories. And he even heard parents trying to discipline their children, threatening them to pay ‘Killer Kang’ - that was the old man’s unfortunate nickname - a small visit if they did not behave. It was as if this small town didn’t have anything else to talk about than a lonely, slightly creepy, man. And if he remembered correctly, he never saw or heard anyone even trying to talk to him. So what did they know?
Jungwon heard a lot. To say the least, he questioned himself quietly if he should have just chosen another topic for his video and interview for a school project. He could have. But something deep down told him quietly not to judge too quickly, not to judge a book only by it’s cover. His parents and his grandmother taught him that early on and it stayed with him ever since. He wanted to give this poor scrutinised man a chance to actually explain himself. Why was he always digging these holes into the ground? Maybe he really was a serial killer and this would be Jungwons biggest mistake, but where’s the fun in not even trying? Right? He could only lose, well...his life...
The 14 year old boy quickly shook his head, trying to stay positive. And then he finally pressed the rusty bell on the side of the door. He heard nothing at first, it was as quiet as it could get, no steps, no talking, no TV. The eerie feeling hanging in the air didn’t make it any better for Jungwon to stay calm and not giddy. “You can do this! He’s not even creepy.” He tried to hype himself up.
He almost wanted to ring again, as his heart sunk. Damp slow steps were coming closer and closer, making him hold his breath unconsciously. The door opened in an awful slow motion, revealing the old man everyone was afraid of. White hair framed his sunken in face full of deep wrinkles. He used a walking stick to stand, his position was crouched forward, so he was about the same height as him, maybe even a bit smaller. And when Jungwon met his eyes, there was a glint in them, that almost scared him off like all the other kids would have. But he stayed put.
The man didn’t say anything, just stared at him, awaiting him to explain this very unusual visit. Nobody had ever dared to ring his house. Not even the mailman thought of doing so.
“Good Morning Mr Kang. Uhm ...I am Yang Jungwon.” The young boy began with slightly unstable voice, trying to get a hold of himself. “I am a student at Namgang Highschool and we are currently doing individual video projects containing an interview with someone we find fascinating and want to learn more about. And...I was wondering if...if maybe it would be possible to...interview you?” Jungwon managed to squeak out, hiding his trembling hands from Mr. Kangs boring hawk eyes.
He still hadn’t said anything, looking up and down the underaged student. Then his eyes met his shaky ones again. “Is this a joke again, boy? Because I have no tolerance for silly boy pranks.” He finally muttered out in a harsh tone, letting Jungwon flinch the slightest. He quickly shook his head, implying that this was his last wish to do.
“No sir, no I swear this is a very serious question and project. I wouldn’t dare to do anything but.” The boy rambled, now fiddling nervously with the hem of his uniform jacket. The man pulled his glasses somewhat higher on his nose before he gave the student a hesitant nod.
“You are the first person for years daring to come talk to me...” he noted absent minded, eyes wandering behind the boy to check if there really weren’t any stupid kids hiding inside the bushes. “How...extraordinary.” He muttered, clinging onto his walking stick as he began turning around.
“You said fascinating people, boy? I have to disappoint you, there is nothing interesting about me, I dare say.” A small sigh left his mouth, beginning to close his door slowly but Jungwon was quicker. What had gotten into him? Was it the surprise at his not so cold attire or maybe has he just gone crazy? But Jungwon wanted to know more about his story. There had to be more.
“Sir, no please. You may think so but quite frankly you are the talk of town every day.” Jungwon began but got stopped hearing the other one scoffing displeased. “Killer Kang...I know this nickname they all give me. Do you use it too? I don’t want to have anything to do with people like this.” His tone got harsher again.
Jungwon frantically shook his head again. “I don’t. I would never. This is the reason why I chose to interview you in the first place. I want to hear your part about everything. I think it is only fair to give you a proper chance to explain. They just don’t know.” He gave the man a pleading look. Mr. Kang hesitated again, letting the boys words sink in. He didn’t seem like he could harm a fly, he thought. Was is worth the struggle?
He didn’t know what or why he was doing it but the next thing Jungwon saw was him walking slowly into the house again, leaving the door open. Should he follow? A quick look over his shoulder told him he should. Jungwon couldn’t believe he really meant it so he still stood unsure, fiddling with the silver camera in his hands, metal cooling against his sweaty palms. “Are you coming, or what?” The now softer voice of the white haired man asked still trotting forward in a steady pace.
This woke Jungwon immediately out of his trance, stumbling clumsily stuttering and rambling while thanking him over and over again. He had made it.
He entered the dark hallway, suddenly being hit with a strong smell of a typical musty grandparents house. It remembered him of his own grandmother’s one, where he spent almost half of his childhood. With one swift movement, he gently shut the door and followed the tracks of this houses owner without forgetting to put his shoes off. There were some stacks of newspaper laying around randomly, old picture frames hanging on some of the white and dark green walls and old brown rugs adorning the cold floor. He noticed a small picture of a young lady in a baby blue dress, sitting on a self built swing while smiling ear to ear. But he quickly moved on. It was as every other old people’s home, Jungwon thought.
“Boy, say, do you want a cup of tea? Or water?” The young student heard the now calm voice asking him, seeing as they arrived in the living room. An antique looking glass chandelier was hanging right in the middle, brown couches placed generously inside the big room. Jungwon was surprised. He expected to shake with pure fear in his veins, but why did it feel like he was just visiting his grandparents? A friendly visit. That was the first moment he knew he misjudged the famously feared old man.
“No thank you. I was wondering if I could maybe...film the whole thing? The interview? I prepared some questions already if that is fine with you.” Jungwon timidly pulled out the camera behind his back and soon enough some pieces of paper. There was a moment of silence, Mr. Kang just looking speechlessly at the innocent and oh so polite brown haired boy. His heart already told him, despite his inner conflicts, that he was a nice boy. A really well-behaved kid. He could tell him, he could understand, and maybe even help. At least that was his hope.
“You are really something else. Jungho was your name?” With small steps he wandered to one of the couches, plopping down painfully slow with a nasty crack of his bones into an already deep hollow on the couch. Just like his grandparents. Jungwon by now was really overwhelmed by the mans compliance and...kindness?
“It’s Jungwon, Mr. Kang.” He added, earning an understanding nod from his side, followed by a motion of his hand for him to sit down. “Of course, of course. You can set up the camera on the table if you have to. It was a long time ago since...anyone filmed me.”
It didn’t took long for the eager student to put his camera on the table in a good angle. His script was already sprawled all across his lap and with nervous looks in between, he asked the man if he was ready to begin the interview. Jungwon was aching to know the truth behind the misunderstood lonely person in front of him. He finally wanted to clear the unpleasant rumours about him, wanting to know what really was behind his actions.
“Ready, boy.”
Jungwon clicked the red recording button on his camera, sitting down on the couch behind it. And he did not waste any time to start.
“My first question for you Mr Kang, has to do with your widely spreaded nickname. As you told me earlier, you were already aware of such name. What do you think about it?”
It was the second time, he heard him scoff in annoyance. “It’s ridiculous what people tend to gossip behind someone’s back when they are bored. Whoever believes these ignorant, mindless comments should go to school again and get educated. This nickname... ‘Killer Kang’ -“ he stopped to caugh out loudly, repositioning himself more comfortable in his seat before continuing to talk. “ - holds absolute no truth in it. I can’t seem to think why somebody even invented it.”
Jungwon immediately nodded in agreement, earning a small nod from the man himself. “That was exactly my point. It looked almost like people just invented some crazy untrue theories when they cannot seem to understand a certain...action.” He tried to find the right words. “It’s probably nothing new to hear, but people around this town, I think they came up with this name solely to...to find an explanation as to why...the holes...I mean you digging them with a shovel in your garden...is that...” he lost his voice in the end of his sentence, not wanting to say any wrong words.
But Mr. Kang just nodded, looking out of the window with a distant look. He suck in a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “It’s probably not the answer you or all the people would like to hear. All the foolish theories. It’s something far more...simple.” He looked over to Jungwon, soft eyes under the thick crease above them. He was ready to tell someone. Just anyone. He longed for a conversation for too long, maybe that is why he agreed in the first place.
He was so lonely.
“Let me tell you my story right from the beginning. I hope you do have some time, boy, it might be a longer story.”
And then he began to tell his story. Your story.
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