#I think we're on the fourth bingo?

[foreverchangingfandomsao3]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi Characters: CC-2224 | Cody, Obi-Wan Kenobi Additional Tags: Sick Character, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Teachers, Math teacher Cody, P.E. teacher Obi-wan, Mustache Cody, First Kiss, Sick CC-2224 | Cody, Covering lessons, Obi-Wan Kenobi is Caring, Gross kiss, I think it's gross anyway, Inspired by Fanart Series: Part 21 of Codywan First Kiss Bingo Summary:

Cody catches the cold/flu going around the school and Obi-Wan visits him after school.

My fill for "gross kiss" for Codywan First Kiss Bingo @codywanfirstkissbingo​

For @sunflowersinheaven​ who inspired this fic with her art!

Bingo card under the cut!

[ckret2]

Chapter 21 of honestly everyone's just sorta used to Bill being the shack's prisoner now (title tbd): Stan & Ford have a birthday party! Bill is not invited. He still manages to find a way to be fiendishly evil.

Also featuring: Wendy deciding what she thinks about "Goldie," the shack's mysterious secret "guest."

####

Mabel slid a piece of paper across the gas station front counter, listing a dozen scratch card serial numbers spread across three different games. "I'd like these numbers in these cards, please!"

The cashier gave the paper a dubious look, then looked at Wendy. "We're not supposed to sell the scratch cards outta order."

"Please?" Wendy asked. "Just a little exception? For us?"

"We really wanna play our lucky numbers," Mabel said. "Plus, I had a vision. In my sleep."

She and Wendy gave him their best big-eyed hopeful pouty looks.

The cashier shrank back. "Well..." He averted his gaze from the adorableness that was Mabel, and sighed. "Just this once. But I don't want to see you two in here with your nonsense again." He started unrolling one of the spools of scratch cards, inspecting the numbers. "These'll be over a hundred dollars."

Wendy winced. "Ooh. Mabel?"

Mabel offered three dollars and a quarter. "That's fine! Can we start with 177 from the beach cards?"

She received the card, depicting a pastel beachy scene next to five miniature bingo boards. She confidently scratched off the card to reveal its winning numbers, pointed at the fourth bingo board where she'd just gotten bingo, and said, "That's $200! Our payout, please."

The cashier took the card, inspected the numbers, and stared at Mabel in amazement. She grinned at him. Wordlessly, he opened his cash register, pulled out several twenties, and offered them over.

"Thank you!" Mabel accepted the money and pointed at the paper. "The rest of our cards, please?"

As they left with eleven scratch cards, Mabel handed Wendy three twenties—"Here! For helping!"—and stuck the rest of the change in her pocket.

"Dude. That was awesome. You were so cool in there, like—" Wendy put on her coolest, most unruffled expression. "'Our payout, please.'"

"That's just the kind of rock star I am." Mabel put the scratch cards in her bike's basket. "Thanks for the help, Wendy!"

"Sure, any time." Especially if she got a surprise $60 out of it. "Heading back to the shack?"

"Yeah! I've gotta finish decorating for the party!"  Mabel waved as she took off down the road. "See you then!"

"See you." She guessed that meant she wasn't invited to hang until the party started. Given the touchy situation inside the shack, no surprises there.

She wondered what Goldie had to do with Mabel's interesting trick with the scratch cards. She was sure there was something.

####

Bill leaned into the kitchen. "Hey! How's that cake coming along?"

Mabel stopped arranging dozens of candles in the frosting to point at the door. "Out, Bill! Nobody's getting cake until the party!"

Dipper said, "You don't even deserve a slice."

"Agree to disagree!" Bill said. "But if you don't give me one anyway, I'll annoy you about it for weeks."

"He can have a slice at the party," Mabel said. "The cake's big enough." A couple of overcrowded candles spilled off the edge of the cake. Mabel picked them up and carefully stuck them back in.

Bill fought back a laugh. "Are you sure about all those candles? If you light 'em all up at once, you'll burn off everyone's eyebrows," he said. "But unfortunately, you'd also melt the frosting."

"The frosting's already a mess," Mabel said, peering at the barely-visible HAPPY BIRTHDAY STAN & FORD hidden beneath the forest of candles. "But Soos doesn't have any of those number-shaped candles, so..." 

"Roman numerals," Bill said.

"Oooh." Mabel looked at the cake thoughtfully, and started pulling out candles. "How do you make 62?"

"LXII. Fifty-ten-one-one," Bill said, then shot a grin at Dipper—who was glaring at Bill for answering before he could. "Isn't that right, smart guy?"

"Yeah," Dipper grumbled.

"You kids take the credit if they ask about the candles," Bill said. "They'll just get grumpy if they know I had any influence on the decorations."

Mabel carefully tilted the bottom leg of the L just enough to keep the tip out of the frosting, and started smoothing out the rest of the candle-pockmarked surface. "Now I've got enough empty frosting to add some decorations!" Mabel said. "I don't have enough time to draw something complicated. Maybe rainbows?"

Dipper shook his head. "I don't think either of them would be into that."

"Draw gold bars," Bill said.

Mabel blew a raspberry. "That's what you'd want on a cake!"

"No, I'd want me on a cake. Stanley likes gold! Stanford should like gold more, you could help him develop a taste for it."

"No."

Dipper suggested, "Maybe you could draw gambling stuff on Stan's side of the cake? Since they couldn't have their birthday party in Vegas like he wanted." Dipper shot a sideways glance at the reason they had to stay in Gravity Falls. (Bill shrugged. It wasn't like he'd asked the Stan twins to stay in town.) "You could do poker chips or playing cards or—"

"Dice!" Mabel said. "Dipper that's perfect, they both like dice! We can put normal dice on Grunkle Stan's side and nerdy dice on Grunkle Ford's—"

"Oh, that's great! I've got my DD&MD dice bag in the attic!"

"I'll look in the board game closet!"

Dipper and Mabel took off. 

Bill waited until he was sure they were gone.

He checked out the kitchen window for witnesses, then picked up a dozen abandoned birthday candles, licked off the frosting, and hid the candles in his hoodie's hood. Too bad they hadn't left a matchbook out, but Bill knew a fun little trick with an empty aluminum can and a tube of toothpaste that would work just fine.

When the kids returned and Mabel stuffed the remaining forty-odd candles back in their box, they never noticed any were missing.

####

Mabel had put herself in charge of the guest list. Which explained why, along with Stan and Ford's actual friends, all Mabel's friends had been invited; as well as—among other people—the mayor ("he's like the Mystery Shack's best customer, Grunkle Stan!"), Shmebulock ("Jeff said Shmebulock stole the Journal 4 you started last fall, I was hoping he might gift it back"), and the Hand Witch and her boyfriend. ("Whaaat, Grunkle Ford you met her TOO?! What a coincidence! Dipper, did you know he met—oh, you did. I didn't read those pages!") It would have been a lot more awkward if not for the fact that the birthday boys were awed and humbled that so many people had attended knowing they were coming to a birthday party for Stan and Ford Pines, and none of the guests had even been bribed.

When Soos and Melody helped Mabel carry out the birthday cake, Ford laughed at the sight of it. "Did you make Roman numerals out of candles? How clever! Stanley, do you know what Roman—"

"Yeah, yeah. I watch the Football Bowl, you know," Stan said. "Honestly, I was expecting this thing to be covered in candles."

"I almost went that route," Mabel said. "But I thought I'd save that kind of firepower for the Fourth of July."

"Hah! That's my girl."

"Happy Birthday" was sung, candles were blown out, and the party lined up to get their cake. Mabel cut a slice, loaded it on a paper plate, then glanced toward the attic window. "I'll be right back! I've gotta use the bathroom. Don't open my presents until I'm back!"

She trotted into the house, taking the cake, a napkin, and a plastic spoon with her.

####

Bill met Mabel at the top of the stairs and scooped the cake out of her hands. "You're my hero, star girl." He carried it halfway back to his window seat, stopped mid-step, and asked, "You got a piece with my name on it?"

"I got the slice with the 'Birt' and took off the extra frosting!"

"Oh," Bill said. "Heh. That's—cute." And he looked so much like he was trying to pretend he wasn't genuinely touched by the gesture, that Mabel didn't have the heart to tell him she'd only thought of it halfway up the stairs.

He flopped back in his usual window seat post—where, Mabel couldn't help but notice, he had a perfect view of the party happening outside without him. She grimaced. "I'm sorry you can't come to the party," she said. "But you did torture and try to murder the birthday boys... and most of the party guests... and left half of them with lingering trauma..."

"Speaking of, how's your therapist doing?"

"Oh, good, she's good. I think she's gonna write a paper about Mabeland."

Bill fell silent, staring out the window. Mabel almost went downstairs—when he said, "You know, I was the only person who gave Stanford a gift on his thirtieth birthday."

Mabel turned back around so fast she almost tripped on the top step. It wasn't often she got a double dose of Bill lore and Grunkle lore. "You were?"

"He didn't make new friends in Oregon and he didn't keep up with his old friends from college. His parents mailed him a gift, but it got here a week late. So I taught him a couple spells to see the stars during the day and keep rain from landing on him, and told him where to be in Portland that afternoon if he wanted to pick up a free cake from a fancy bakery."

"Aww. That was... nice of you." But Mabel had to hesitate before saying it, automatically wondering what Bill's motives had been for giving the gifts and what his motive now was for sharing this. 

Bill waved a hand dismissively. "Ahh, they were parlor tricks. They're easy, flashy cantrips that impress humans but don't do any harm," he said. "Not much harm, anyway. That night he told me all about how he was the only human to see his zodiac constellation on his birthday. The genius spent all day staring at the sun so he could see the stars!" He laughed.

But it quickly petered out. "And now I'm personally banned from his birthday party. Funny, huh?"

Maybe Bill was trying to get Mabel to pity him; but she kinda thought he was just pitying himself. She patted his shoulder sympathetically. "Losing friends is tough," she said. She paused. "And that's why we should be nice to them."

Bill cracked up so loudly Mabel half expected the party outside to hear him. "Okay, Glory Unicorn! I've learned today's moral about friendship. Get outta here. See if I ever tell you anything again." But he was grinning as he shooed her off.

####

When Mabel came back cakeless, Dipper gave her a dark look, but said nothing.

"Are we opening gifts yet?" Mabel picked up a box and flung an arm around Dipper's shoulder. "You've gotta open this one first! It's from both of us to both of you!" She waved it at Stan and Ford until they took it together.

Ford pointed at the card that said, "To our Grunkles, from your gniece and gnephew!" "That isn't how you spell niece and nephew?" Stan elbowed him.

"Nope!" Mabel said. "But it's how you abbreviate great-niece and great-nephew."

"Ah, I see! Very creative."

"Nice recovery," Stan muttered. Ford elbowed him back. Together they tore off the wrapping paper and opened their box.

Inside were two more boxes, each small enough to hold in one hand—a square one labeled "Stan" and a long narrow one labeled "Ford."

Stan opened his box and pulled out a thick gold chain with a coin dangling from it. Engraved on the coin in sloppy text were the words "#1 Grunkle."

Soos held up a hand. "I did the engraving! First try."

Mabel pointed at the coin. "We made it out of pirate treasure that we have for reasons that we can't talk about! There's a skull on the back!"

They'd hung it from his favorite gold chain. He'd been missing it for a week—and he'd never even suspected the kids. How about that. Choked up, Stan said, "It's—it's great." He took off the chain he was currently wearing, chucked it into the bushes, and put on his gift. "C'mere, you two." He wrapped his arms around Dipper and Mabel.

Soos held his arms out hopefully. Stan rolled his eyes, but waved him over for a hug too.

Ford opened his box. "A pen?"

Dipper said, "It has an ergonomic grip, can take standard ink refills, writes super smoothly—I tested it out myself—makes a very satisfying click, and it's red with gold trim to match your journals."

Mabel said, "I helped pick out the design!"

"... And that's why it's also sparkly."

"I didn't do the engraving on that one," Soos said. "We had a lotta spare pirate coins but only one pen, so. They got it done at the mall."

Ford rotated the pen in his hand until he spotted the (more professional-looking) engraving on the barrel, filled in with gold. "Mine says #1 Grunkle too?"

Dipper said, "C'mon, we're not gonna choose between you two."

Stan said, "Oh, I see how it is! Trying to butter us both up, are you?" He reached under Dipper's hat to ruffle his hair. Smiling, Ford carefully slid his gift into his coat's breast pocket next to his usual pen.

####

When Bill saw that Mabel was back outside, he got up, left the rest of his cake on the window seat, scooted aside a storage box sitting forgotten in a corner of the attic, and pried a loose board from the wall.

He took his stolen candles out of his hood, wrapped them in the party napkin Mabel had given him, and stashed them in a plastic sandwich bag where he'd already stowed a crushed cider can, its edges torn and sharp.

Then he re-hid the bag, fixed the wall, replaced the storage box, gently brushed some cobwebs over the floor to hide the trail in the dust where he'd scooted the box, and turned away from his hiding spot.

To see a gnome wearing a journal like a backpack.

They stared at each other.

"You didn't see anything," said Bill.

"Shmebulock," said Shmebulock.

Bill eyed Shmebulock, the staircase, the window—and then dropped into a crouch, knees and feet spread apart like a sumo wrestler, teeth bared.

Shmebulock cracked his knuckles.

Five minutes later, Bill added Journal 4 to his hiding spot, with a mental note to find a new hiding spot the gnomes didn't know about later.

Unfortunately, Shmebulock escaped with Bill's cake.

####

Wendy squinted up at the blonde shape in the attic window. "You know—all this last week, I kept thinking I saw someone up there. I just assumed it was my imagination," she said. "Guess Goldie didn't get invited to the birthday party, huh?"

"Nope," Dipper said. "And for good reason."

Wendy laughed. "Yeah, sounds it."

Dipper glanced toward his grunkles. At the moment, Ford was opening a cheap set of watercolor paints and giving Mabel an exasperated look. ("I thought we could try them out together! And hate them together!" "All right, that might be fun.") He lowered his voice and picked at his cake. "So. You found out the big secret, huh?"

"Yup," Wendy said. She lightly punched Dipper's shoulder. "Hey—don't look so glum, man. I'm not mad you didn't tell me. There's some kind of family drama and a missing person case involved. I get it—you don't talk about that kind of stuff outside the family."

"Yeah, hah. Right," Dipper said. "So, what do you think of... Goldie?"

Wendy glanced up at the figure in the window. "We didn't talk a whole bunch before Goldie and Stan started arguing about plagiarism," she said, "but I got that she's some kind of wildcard paranormal investigator who gives off insane grifter energy. And seems really mentally messed up from being trapped in another dimension, but like, the kind of messed up that probably makes you fun at parties?" She was already mentally playing Goldie off of her friend group, trying to figure out how well she'd mesh with them. She seemed like the kind of person who'd be into some harmless trespassing and recreational vandalism. "How old is Goldie? She was working on a Ph.D., so that's what, mid-20s? Mid-20s but actually mid-50s after not aging for thirty years? Honestly, if I just met her on the street I would've thought she was like, 15. She does not look her age." Maybe it was the lack of makeup?

Under his breath, Dipper muttered, "You have no idea." He glanced away from Wendy, stuffed a large forkful of cake in his mouth, and mumbled to himself, "How much should I say? Sharing too much could be dangerous, but if I don't say anything..." Mumble, mumble.

Wendy would never tell Dipper how funny it was that he monologued to himself and hoped nobody would notice. Usually she'd politely ignore him, but if there was something dangerous... She lightly elbowed him. "Dipper. Come on," she said. "I can tell something's eating you. You can trust me."

"Ugh, I know, but..." Dipper glanced again at the rest of the birthday party—just far enough to be out of earshot, currently entranced by some thingamajig Fiddleford had gifted the Stans—and let out a heavy sigh. Voice low, he said, "Okay, Wendy, listen. For your own safety, you need to know that Goldie is way worse than whatever you heard about him last night. And I can't tell you why, because of reasons I also can't tell you—believe me, I wish I could tell you, but—don't trust him, okay?" Dipper gave her an earnest, pleading look. "Just don't. He's dangerous. That's all I can say."

It figured that even after Wendy learned the big secret, she'd just find another, smaller secret hidden underneath. Like a matryoshka doll. (She quietly made note of the "he" and wondered if Goldie had been part of the queer scene in the 80s, or if he'd only figured himself out while he was in ghost land.) "I'm assuming he's dangerous for Weird Spooky Paranormal reasons?"

"Yeah," Dipper said, teeth grit. "Yeah, basically."

He wanted to tell her more, she wanted to know more, and she was ready to play 20 questions on Goldie's backstory. Picking through what she'd learned last night for clues, Wendy asked, "Is it connected to Ford's research? All the weird magic stuff he got into?"

"Um." Dipper shrugged uncertainly. "Y...yeah? But... bigger than that?"

"Is it portal stuff." What was the most dangerous thing she knew of that was connected to the portal. "Is it Bill stuff."

Dipper let out an anguished groan, pulled off his hat, and buried his face in it. "I can't tell you more than I already have!"

"Oh my god it's Bill stuff."

Dipper eloquently said, "MRRGHF."

"Okay got it, so Goldie was some kind of Bill groupie or discovered how to summon him or something. Something like that. I don't need to know the details! But he's totally Bill-adjacent."

"Yeah. Yeah. Yep." Dipper nodded emphatically. "Bill-adjacent is... the best way to describe Goldie."

"But Bill's gone, right? So Goldie's like a cultist without a cult leader. Doesn't that mean he's harmless now?" Wendy asked. "Or do you think he's gonna try to cause the apocalypse in honor of his boss or whatever."

Dipper tugged his hat back on his head and straightened it out. "I'm sure he'd try to end the world again if he could, but... we're all still trying to figure out what he can do."

"So, domestic terrorism risk. Cool," Wendy said. "Y'know, I sorta expected to run into a guy like that in the shack eventually, but I always thought they'd be here because of Stan, not Ford." She rolled her eyes. "I'll warn you if he starts talking about ending the world or anything."

"Thanks, Wendy." Dipper glanced uneasily toward the birthday party. (They were still distracted, currently trying to douse the flamethrower on Fiddleford's birthday gift. It was trying to eliminate the competitor gifts.) "Just... don't tell anybody else, okay? If the town finds out that Goldie is—you know—Bill-adjacent..."

"Relax." She pantomimed zipping her mouth. "I'm not gonna organize an angry mob."

She glanced up at the attic window. Goldie was still up there, staring down at the party. He noticed Wendy staring and made a face at her.

She made the same face back, and saw him silently laughing. Okay, he had bad taste in friends, obviously; but Goldie seemed kinda cool in an unhinged way. From what Wendy had gathered, Bill had conned and then betrayed half the people she knew—and if the Pines had only just managed to get Goldie back on this plane of reality, months after Weirdmageddon, that meant Bill hadn't bothered to rescue him when he could, so Goldie was just another victim. Maybe he just needed to be reintegrated into society.

Dipper said, "Hey, Stan just poured punch on the robot and it made the fire worse. Do you think we should help?"

Wendy looked at the fire—and looked up at the fire. She was moving before she spoke. "Yeah, let's do something about that."

They rejoined the rest of the party, and Wendy put Goldie out of her mind.

####

Ford stared at the ring on his left sixth finger.

Welcome back, the Hand Witch had said.

Thirty years ago, he'd met her at a carnival. She'd told him that he'd chosen the wrong allies and would doom himself for it. She'd given him a ring with a blue cabochon and told him that if it ever turned black, there was no hope for him.

He'd dismissed her as a phony palm reader; and, the night he'd decided Bill was right about Fiddleford not being bold enough to follow through with the portal project, the ring had turned black, and he'd thrown it in the lake.

Now here it was on his finger again.

He didn't think her a phony now. Everything she'd told him had been true. And anyway, it was hard to doubt she had real magic when she spent half the party trying to stop two small disembodied hands from escaping her pockets to visit Mabel. 

"Why are you giving this back to me?"

"It's your birthday! And I thought it might be useful."

"For what? Am I in danger?"

"I don't know, I'd have to give you another reading to see." She had pulled a cartomancy deck from her pocket. "Do you want me to?" The card on the bottom of the deck had been a triangle with a snake slithering through its eye socket.

Ford hadn't wanted a reading. He knew now that what he'd called superstition back at that carnival might be a legitimate form of prophecy he simply didn't understand; but he was tired of living his life by signs and portends.

All the same, it was comforting to see that his ring was blue.

Ford's view of the ring was blocked by Stan shoving over the "Get Out Of One Misdemeanor Free" coupon Mayor Cutebiker had given as his birthday gift. "Hey, do you think I'd get in trouble if I made a buncha copies of this?"

Ford took the coupon and inspected it thoughtfully. "If you do get in trouble... a coupon counterfeiting charge couldn't possibly be worse than a misdemeanor, could it?"

"That's what I like to hear!"

It had been a surprisingly long day—and, by far, the best birthday either of them had had in well over forty years. (Was it really that long?) Now they were retired to the parlor Soos and Abuelita had converted into a double guest room, sitting on their beds facing each other as they got ready for sleep.

There was a knock at the door. Ford stood. "Coming—" He opened the door to see Bill's grinning face, a foot from his own. "Oh. You." Ford resisted the urge to step back, in case Bill interpreted as an invitation to come in.

"Hiya, birthday boy!" Bill's gaze immediately drifted down to Ford's coat pocket. "Hey—new pen? I like the sparkle, adds a little pizazz."

"What do you want, Cipher."

"Just to hand this over." Bill pressed a couple of envelopes into Ford's chest, and kept them pinned there with a fingertip until Ford reluctantly took them. "I knew you'd hate getting something from me at your party, so just for you I waited until all the festivities were over. You're welcome."

Ford studied the envelopes. They were two pieces of yellow construction paper that had been folded into envelope shape, and written on each one, in lurching crayon text that drifted up and down, was "Stanford" and "Stanley". "You made cards?"

"You're flattered."

"I most certainly am not."

"'The lady doth protest too much, methinks.'" Bill shrugged. "Hey, they're your birthday gifts. Toss them in the fire if that makes you happiest. You just might wanna open them first—you know, to make sure I didn't write a fire-activated explosion spell on the inside."

Stan grabbed his envelope out of Ford's hand and eyed it in deep suspicion. "And why did you make these?"

"Because it's your birthday. Come on! Why am I explaining this, it's your species's ritual."

"I mean why are you doing it? We all hate each other. We're planning your execution, here," Stan said. "So what's your angle?"

"What do you need my measurements for, you pervert."

"ALL right—" Stan stepped toward Bill, cracking his knuckles, and was only stopped by Ford's hand across his chest.

Bill leaned back against the hallway's opposite wall. "Whoa! Consider this a peace offering! You know—'no hard feelings for all the murder, attempted or planned'! I can be a polite house guest, even if I'm not a voluntary one." Bill smiled wryly, "I'm trapped on an alien planet where I know less than a dozen people and all of them hate me. It gets boring." He looked directly in Ford's eyes. "And we've got history. Is it so hard to believe I might want to be friends again?"

This time, Stan had to put a hand across Ford's chest.

Ford said, "You're up to something."

"Is that a statement or a question?"

"Statement."

"Then you don't want an answer. Enjoy your gifts! Or don't, I'm not your boss." Bill waved, and slunk around the corner back toward the living room.

Ford shut the door. He sat on his bed, examined the envelope, and glanced at Stan, who was sitting on his bed doing the same thing.

They grimaced at each other.

"Okay," Stan said. "Is this more dangerous if we do open it or don't open it?" He hefted his envelope in his hand. "This thing's pretty heavy for just a card."

"Is it?" Ford's wasn't very heavy. He turned on a lamp on a bedside table and held the envelope up in front of it, trying to see through the construction paper. "I think he's counting on us to open these. I doubt he set a trap that will activate if we leave it closed—it's not his style."

"So, what do we think. Some kinda hypnotic mind-control magic that's activated by reading it? Or is he just trying to bribe us into liking him better?"

"He probably doesn't have hypnotic mind-control magic. If he did, why would he have spent so long trying to manipulate humans into doing his bidding?"

"I dunno, maybe he's stupid."

Testily, Ford said, "He's not stupid."

"No—listen, I've been thinking about this for months," Stan said. "You spent thirty years hopping between a zillion different dimension, right? If there's already safe portals out there, why'd he spend so long tricking someone into building a crummy one that'd destroy the universe, instead of using one of those? He's gotta be stupid!"

"I've... wondered the same thing about the portal," Ford admitted grudgingly. "But, no—I've seen him use so many roundabout tricks to manipulate minds that if he were capable of overt mind control, I'm sure he'd have used it by now."

"Fine, so mind control's off the table. But we're probably safer if we leave these alone. If we open them, they might be an annoying attempt to kiss up to us, or they might be dangerous." Stan waved his envelope like a fan. "And, we're gonna open them anyway, because not knowing will kill us, right?"

In his youth, Ford had arrogantly looked down on Pandora. "Of course we're going to open them."

They opened their envelopes.

They both contained a sheet of type paper folded in half with nothing on the front and messages written inside. Ford's read, "Stanford– I'd tell you to go to hell, but you'd barely be there long enough for it to be worth the trip. Happy birthday! –Δέος" Charming. Particularly out of the heel who'd just claimed he wanted to be friends.

"Hey, what is this?" Stan held his letter out for Ford to see: "Stanley– You were only the accomplice. I won't hold a grudge. Happy birthday! –Δέος" Stan pointed at the last word, "Is this some kind of curse?"

"A signature. Bill's real name isn't 'Bill Cipher'—it's just one of many nicknames he uses when communicating with humans. And, when writing to people who know him well, he prefers to sign with that nickname. It's pronounced déos." It meant awe—whether manifested in the form of fear or reverence. And it probably was no coincidence that Bill had picked a word that, to the untrained ear, sounded so much like the Latin deus—god.

Once, long ago, waking up to find his own hand had written a letter signed by "Awe" in a foreign alphabet had filled Ford with awe. Now... well, now it looked a little try-hard, didn't it. "Between you and me, I think Bill likes that signature best because it starts with a triangle." In Bill's handwriting, the delta looked unusually equilateral.

"Really fond of his own face, isn't he," Stan said, digging in the envelope for the rest of his "gift"—and he pulled out a handful of scratch cards. "What the...?"

How the heck had Bill gotten his hands on those? Ford checked to see if his envelope had the same—and came out with five pieces of notebook paper instead, still tattered on the edge from being torn out of a spiral notebook, covered front and back with writing—multiple languages, some inhuman, with a smattering of complex sigils and symbols. The first line on the first page read "Spell to Resurrect Fowl (chicken, turkey, duck, etc.—funny at dinner parties!)" Ford slapped the pages face down on his nightstand without reading the next line.

"What is it?" Stan asked.

"Magic," Ford said, voice flat with irritation.

"A trap—?"

"No. Magic for me. Spells I don't know. The kind of knowledge I'd—document in my journals."

Stan processed that. He tossed his scratch cards down on his own nightstand. "Lemme get this straight," he said. "Less than two weeks since he tried to kill us, with no access to the outside world and no resources at his disposal but his stupid wits—without even getting his hands on a freaking envelope—he somehow managed to get us both thoughtful, considerate gifts that are deeply relevant to our personal interests and passions! Is that about right?"

"It seems to be, yes."

"That jerk! I oughta wring his neck!"

Ford nodded in agreement. "I didn't know you're into scratch cards." He tamped down the urge to lecture Stan on the statistical improbability of making a profit.

"See, if even you didn't know, now I'm even madder that he does!" Stan groaned in frustration. "I kicked the habit. Still like playing 'em if I get them as a gift."

"Hmm." That was all right, then. Couldn't lose money on scratch cards if somebody else had spent the money.

They glared together at their thoughtful, relevant, deeply unwanted gifts, trying to decide what to do about them. Stan was the first to let out a resigned sigh and snatch his up. "What the heck. They're already paid for, I'm not gonna throw away potential free money just because it came from him." He fished around in his discarded pants pockets for a quarter. "But I'm not gonna enjoy myself!" He flipped through the cards, noting they were each labeled in a corner from 1/11 to 11/11, and muttered, "Why'd he draw triangles on some of the numbers?"

Well, if Stan had caved into his curiosity... Back into the box, Pandora, and perhaps we'll find hope at the bottom.

"Mabel must've helped him get these," Stan said. "It's the only way. And these cards have glitter and unicorns all over them." He scratched off his first card, and said, "Hey, three bunny faces—how 'bout that? I made thirty bucks already."

"At least it's not a total waste," Ford muttered, skimming the pages before him.

It was a treasure trove.

A spell to uncook food. The cipher to decrypt the Voynich manuscript. A potion to change eye color. A river stone submerged not five miles away that, when dry, hovered. A ritual involving five hours of meditation and a lot of mushrooms that opened up psychic communication with Earth's nearest alien neighbors. An illusion to make the floor look like lava. ("Good for games if you're very bored and oppressed by gravity.") The names of five hitherto-unknown demon nobles, the sigils to summon and bind them, the fields of knowledge and political influence in which they were most helpful, and a few personal tips on how to best to twist their arms into doing a favor. A complicated way to grind glasses that let one see, depending on prescription strength, anywhere from several seconds to several minutes into the future. And on and on.

And Bill didn't just toss down a few mystical-sounding words and move on: in a few terse sentences after each spell, he hinted at the principles that made them work (freely mixing magic, physics, and metaphysics), the people who'd created or discovered the trick (whether human, inhuman, unearthly, or transdimensional), where Ford could go digging to independently verify the information if he didn't want to take Bill's word for it—and what other, greater things someone might use these tricks to do, if only they fully understood how they worked, if only they had the right teacher. Bill had filled the margins, scribbled extra info in red pen in between the rows of black to double the amount of text he could cram on each line. Ford could fill an entire journal just by copying, disentangling, and expanding on everything Bill had packed into this dense five-page grimoire.

Bill had given Ford more in this letter than he had in all the years he'd been posing as Ford's friend—excluding those accursed portal blueprints. He'd shared the kinds of things Ford had always dreamed his Muse might show him. He gave it away like a free sample to entice a new customer. Five pages of deep secrets meant nothing to Bill and his infinite knowledge. He could have done this all along. He only did it now to try to bribe Ford into sparing his life: see what you could miss out on?

As Ford read the pages, his hands trembled in rage.

"—two hundred dollars, two hundred fifty dollars," Stan muttered. "Those are the biggest yet." He waved the scratch cards at Ford. "I don't understand it! That's eight winners in a row! I've made almost a thousand bucks just by scratching these off—that's not luck! How's he do it? What kinda weird alien magic gives you scratch card telepathy?"

"I don't know. I had no idea he could identify winning scratch cards," Ford said. "But I'm not surprised."

Stan shook his head in amazement, and scratched the next card.

Ford crushed the notepaper pages into a ball.

And he smoothed them back out. Bill was a monster, but this knowledge was precious. 

He looked at the Hand Witch's ring like it might tell him the correct course; but no matter which way his thoughts swayed, the gem remained a steady blue.

"This card's a thousand bucks all by itself," Stan said. "I've never won a thousand in my life. There's no way..." He scratched furiously at the last card, revealing symbols patterned after an array of gems and jewelry. "Five hundred!" Scratch scratch scratch— "Times five?! That's—!" He seized up all his cards and quickly tallied his winnings. "That's a total of nearly five thousand dollars!" He let out a disbelieving laugh. "Who needs Vegas? This monster's been better to me than she ever has!"

"Stanley, that's exactly what he wants you to think," Ford snapped. "He's giving us everything we want so we'll be more reluctant to kill him. This is less than chump change to him! Don't forget that his goal—"

"I know! I'm not stupid, I know what he's doing. Lotto numbers aren't worth the safety of the universe. But sh—shoot, Stanford, he handed me five grand for free and I'm keeping it."

"Fine," Ford said. "Fine. I suppose there's no point in throwing it away on principle."

"Darn straight!"

Ford glowered down at his underhanded "gift"—this little glimpse behind the veil into the mysteries of the universe. His whole chest bubbled and burned with rage; but beneath it—twinkling like a lonely star, twinkling like hope at the bottom of Pandora's box—was something he hadn't felt since Bill betrayed him.

Awe.

It was like waking up to a letter from his Muse.

This was who Bill could be—gift-giver, wish-granter, teacher, guide, friend—and he chose not to be. Why?! When this was so easy for him—why did he have to be what he was instead?

This charitable act only made the true Bill look even worse by contrast.

Ford re-smoothed the pages, carefully folded them in half, and stored them back in their construction paper envelope. He'd leave them there until he'd independently researched every one of these spells and ensured they did what Bill said they did and that there weren't any hidden side-effects.

And then he'd see about adding this information to his current journal.

No point throwing it away on principle.

####

(Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed, I'd deeply appreciate hearing your thoughts! Thanks!)

[remidyal]

Game Changer Season 6 episodes, ranked by my personal enjoyment

Because I also enjoy arbitrarily ranking things! If you disagree... I mean, that's fine? I liked every episode this season, just.. I liked some episodes better than others. I'm grouping the Ratfish episodes together, so we've got eight entries. Spoilers for, um, every game changer episode this season, obviously.

#8 Pencils Down:

I'm not as into drawings and all as I am a lot of the other stuff, though this was probably the most wholesome episode of this season. I'm, naturally, opposed to wholesomeness too.

Favorite bit:

The proposed tattoos were a lot of fun.

#7 Ratfish (parts 1 and 2):

I think this one got hurt for me by a couple things - I know absolutely nothing about the show they're mimicking, unlike Survivor or the Bachelor, and I did not particularly enjoy anything directly to do with the Ratfish or understand why I should care about his opinions and arbitrary decisions. I assumed that the cast would recognize who this person was and we'd get some kind of payoff there, but nope. Everything just between the cast was great, though.

Favorite bit:

Honestly there's a ton of quick moments to choose from here, but I think my favorite is Brennan incorrectly going for the seat marked Brennan Lee Mulligan at the end.

#6 The Newlyweb Game:

This one was gentle good fun, I enjoyed everyone involved, there were just more standout moments in some of the later episodes on this list. This is fighting with Pencils Down for the most wholesome episode, or at least the one that would least fit into a saw trap. In spite of that this would be the episode all time of Game Changer I would least be willing to be on, even in the world where I'm not firmly aroace and have a partner - I think I would sooner light myself on fire than let someone I know have full access to my phone.

Favorite bit:

Revealing how many unread emails people had and the shock and judgement at totally reasonable numbers, as someone with around forty thousand unread emails in my primary gmail account dating back to 2004.

#5 Bingo

We're really into tough competition now! I loved this episode, and that it somehow turned into a tormenting Brennan episode even though he wasn't even supposed to be there. This was obviously slightly rigged so that the players in the third set of Bingo were most likely to win (and it was actually impossible for the people on stage) but honestly pulling it off was so good.

Favorite Bit:

I mean, it's the reveal to Trapp and everyone of the existence of the third group of course.

#4 Second Place

First, I know that for meta reasons this should be second, but it's not. Oh well. Sam alleges that this episode wasn't intentionally meant to torment Brennan; I do not believe Sam's lies. Everyone in the world saw the twist at the end coming and it's still funny.

Favorite bit:

Ally declaring that Brennan can ring the gong the loudest and Brennan's brain breaking harder than anything that Sam had actually planned.

#3 Sam Says 3

I can't believe this one's only third. If this is how Sam Says ends - and I have a hard time seeing how a fourth edition can escalate, even outside of the BTS claiming that they see three times as the limit for the same premise most of the time - then what an ending. I'm not sure any other game concept has managed to make the players so consistently tricked. My only critique of it is that I think I like the first couple times at this well just a little bit more, with nothing in this quite matching Ally flying to New York or the Something We'll Have To Bleep energy for me.

Favorite Bit:

It's hard to top the fake Sam body dropping from the ceiling.

#2 Beat the Buzzer

Every episode with the Seven cast is always incredible, and production-wise this seems like the craziest thing they've ever pulled off. Any episode where they break out of just the stage is always good, and I think this is the most extensive use of that they've ever done. Incredible variety, great cameos from Aabria and Persephone, complete manic energy from all three contestants. A+ episode.

Favorite Bit:

There's so much here, but I think mine as someone who worked as a pizza delivery driver was the entire exchange where Rehka just ends up getting the bag with the buzzer and a bunch of loose oreos. Was production prepared with everything that was on that menu or would they have actually ordered breadsticks somewhere to use as a prop?

#1 Deja Vu

Time loop stuff is always a favorite of mine, and pulling one off as an episode is ALREADY a great premise before you even get into all of the other cast and the editing. (Shout out to Siobhan Thompson for being in exactly two Game Changer episodes and them being this one and Escape the Green Room; guess we know what pepper rating she puts down.) Great chemistry between the cast, a truly deranged display from Sam, and of course the Wenis. Genuinely the WEIRDEST episode of the season, too, always a good sign.

It's a shame they already repeated the premise too much to do a follow up to this one...

Favorite Bit(s):

I'm doing two for this one because it's my list and I can.

"This isn't fucking Um, Actually!" with sincere righteous anger.

Everything to do with Zac as Grant, most of all how easy it would have been to just make that Zac as Zac.

[boozles]

GMMTV 2025 Tier List

Thank you to @firstkanaphans for tagging me to do this! And shoutout to @rythyme for the template!

I shan't lie, I think we really lucked out with GMMTV 2025; at least, I know I did. All of my favourites got lead roles, we got lots of themes that I am super into, and I'm just so excited!

Breakdown of S & A tiers:

S-tier

Melody of Secrets. I still have no clue what this is actually about other than it seems to be a mystery (murder mystery?) and I am here for it. I LOVE crime/detective dramas so I am hyped to see ForceBook in a more serious and darker series.

Ticket to Heaven. I've said it before, but I'm pretty obsessed with religion, and my dream career is to be a historian of religion, so the minute you throw some toxic Christianity into a show I am hooked. I honestly cannot WAIT for this. I think Fourth and Gemini are going to do tremendous things that will make me cry every week.

Wu. I don't even care if this is a BL or not, I just need my SkyNani fix. It looks mysterious, and we all love a good thread of fate story.

Dare You To Death. Again, I love crime/detective dramas and this looks like it's gonna be dark but funny, and I'm sorry, have you SEEN Joong? I feel like JD have both improved with their acting lately, and I'm so excited for this.

A-tier

A Dog and A Plane. I could have cried when I saw TayNew were getting a series. I mean, they didn't do any shows together for a few years then just blew us all away with Cherry Magic then Peaceful Property, and I honest am so excited for this silly series. And MarcPoon!

Cat for Cash. I didn't even include FK in my bingo card because I genuinely did not believe there was a chance of them having a show announced because they deserve a break. BUT HERE WE ARE. Also, cats. And First talking to cats. (I had a slight panic because I have wip that's to do with cats and I was like WHO'S BEEN READING MY NOTES but it's all good, it's nothing like it XD)

Memoir of Rati. I feel like we're getting our I Feel You Linger in the Air fix through this, since we're probably not gonna get that second season. But this looks really good, and really emotional. It looks like a real lakorn, and I'm excited for this - though I know I will cry. A lot.

Only Friends: Dream On. I'm so amused that we're getting this? Like the company said FUCK YOU to the haters. I also can't help but feel they really put this show together for EarthMix; they put Mix in the last episode of S1 to see the reactions, didn't they? AND BOSTON. I'm so here for how traumatic, messy and toxic this is going to be. I need it now.

Me and Thee. I've grown to adore PondPhuwin and this looks like it's gonna be funny, but with a certain something else I can't quite put my finger on right now. I like the role reversal of Pond being the rich kid, though it does feel like the storyline is going to be a little bit like Fish Upon the Sky and Hidden Agenda, but I'm good with that.

As for B, C & D tiers, don't get my wrong, i am excited for Burnout Syndrome and That Summer, but they haven't taken priority for me. I'm not a big fan of OffGun (I'm a Gun fan, but I just don't see what others see with the pairing) and I'm excited to see them with Dew - I think that's going to be explosive. I'm also hyped for WinnySatang to be leads in their own show, even if the royalty thing doesn't pique my interest. I'm also kinda hyped for Love You Teacher; I know people are a bit weirded out by it, but I think it's going to be so funny? I hate amnesia tropes, but this ia a twist on it and it reminds me of The Simpsons episode where Homer thinks he's a ten year old boy, and I need that kinda of shenanigans. I honestly think this kind of role was made for Santa.

I'm gonn tag some people that might be interest in doing this! You obviously don't have to, but it's been fun to see other people's thoughts and opinions on what they're most looking forward to!

@firstkant @slonekaru @negrowhat @sparklyeyedhimbo @gunsatthaphan

[please-let-me-be-horny]

The Good, the Bad and the Neutral in: Hide and Seek.

(The following story was requested by @decaffeinated-anxiety, and features a heavy focus on stalking)

Neutral Drummed his fingers against the steering wheel, anxiously gazing out the windshield towards the rapidly darkening sky. Besides him, Good was looking through the passenger side window, trying and failing to see anything in the back alleys behind the buildings they passed. It was getting later in the day and soon night will be falling. They really didn't have a lot of time to find him.

Bad had gotten out. And the last time he had gotten loose, he nearly killed someone.

"I honestly have no idea how I'm expected to trust you after this, how do you let something like this happen?!" Neutral was lacking his usual monotone, instead being replaced by obvious and audible stress and frustration. It was rare his emotions were so clear.

"oh once again this is my fault? Even if I had caught him sneaking out, how the fuck are you expecting me to stop him?" Good threw his arms up defensively as Neutral swung across and swatted at his arm frantically.

"Maybe if you weren't stoned to the gills all the time you'd have noticed him fucking leaving! Hell I didn't even find out he was missing until the fucking intern asked when he would be back! Fucking hell...." Neutral let out a frustrated sigh, slamming his fist into the steering wheel. "We're going to fucking prison if they catch him, you know that right?"

They continued to bicker amongst themselves for a while, the sun gradually dipping below the horizon and the street lights flickering into life, as the shadows cast by the buildings around them drew larger and darker. Even now as the two of them gazed out into the darkness, an ever growing sense of dread filled the pair of them.

"right...so he's probably on a hunt....we don't have to find him, we just have to find his food....ah, speak of the devil...." As he finished thinking out loud, he gave Good a nudge and pointed towards one of the alleys they were parked across the street from. A girl was leaving the rear of her shop, clearly locking up for the night. They watched as she placed ear buds into her ears, and pulled her hood up over her head.

"ok ok, this is promising....she's making an easy target of herself...and she doesn't appear to be with anyone...bingo. She is our carrot on a stick. We follow her, We find Bad." He turned to look at Good, who was simply nodding his head, attempting to process this information. Rolling his eyes, neutral grew impatient of waiting for Good to put the pieces together, and pulled the van away from the curb, begining to circle of the block so they could keep tabs on their bait.

"hood up means her peripheral vision is gonna be worse than normal. Listening to music means she isn't gonna hear anyone following behind her. She is literally Bads dream target." Neutral spoke slowly, intentionally dumbing things down for Good.

"I'm not talking to you, you're being an asshole." Good huffed, crossing his arms in a sulk as the pair of them continued to do laps of the block, circling her like sharks in bloodied waters. Neutral simply rolled his eyes and focused on their target.

She had only left the store a few minutes ago and was already getting the strange feeling she was being followed. It wasn't an uncommon feeling for her, especially since she had started taking late shifts. But this time it felt different. She had seen the same black van pass her multiple times. First pass. Second pass. Third pass. She could feel herself becoming more and more exposed by the moments. She waited for the van to round the corner ahead of her, before ducking into an alley and attempting to follow a different route to escape her potential pursuers.

Neutral and Good were still in grumpy silence when they rounded the corner on their fourth pass and noticed she had vanished.

"Where the fuck did she go?! What?!"

"Do you think she made us?"

"well I dunno about you but most women I know don't know how to turn into fucking smoke, get out and go check the alleyways out, I'll keep lapping the block and see where she pops up..."

Good jumped out the van with a huff, still annoyed at the tone Neutral was taking with him. He quickly crossed the road and entered into the alleyway, just in time to see a dark silhouette take off running around a corner. Fuck.

She heard the footsteps behind her as she ran, getting more and more lost in the maze of back streets and alleyways. It was dark. She couldn't see. And all she could hear was the sound of footsteps rapidly approaching behind her. She turned a corner. Then another. And another. She didn't know where she was anymore. Only that she was being chased. She turned another corner, running into something hard and falling to the floor.

Bad looked down at the girl who had just ran into him, scowling and frustrated that she hadn't seen him. Letting go of the now crushed and ruined groceries he was clutching to his chest, he let the mess of wet paper bags and crushed crisps fall to his feet as Good rounded the corner, clearly out of breath and struggling to stand up right.

"Sto-oh...OH! holy shit dude where did you go?!" Goods whole attitude changed the moment he saw Bad, jumping over the body of the girl he had just been chasing to bring his brother into a one sided and very affectionate hug. "god we've looking all over for you, man, Neutrals in the van pulling his finger nails out with worry." Bad pushed Good off if him, throwing him a glare and motioning to the mess of groceries in the floor, before reaching into his pocket and handing Good a handwritten shopping list. In Goods handwriting.

"oh...oh yeah I sent you to get snacks, didn't I?....man maybe neutral was right about how much I'm getting stoned lately..." Bad simply rolled his eyes, pushing Good to the side and focusing his attention on the girl Infront of him, before turning back towards Good, a confused look on his face.

"oh, yeah uh....sorry about that, chick, we thought our friend here was gonna...well we won't go into it. You ok?" Good lowered himself to the ground beside the girl, offering her a hand and helping her to her feet. "I uh....you aren't gonna hurt me then? You weren't....trying to kidnap me or rape me or murder me or anything?!" As she said this, Bad looked over her, glaring down into her eyes, still frustrated she had just demolished his groceries. Though he couldn't speak, Bad was quickly picking up on the slight differences and changes in her tone. Confusion. Disappointement. Anger. All very clear to him, but passing way over his brother's head.

"well, thing is my brother here was lost, and he has a habit for following pretty girls ho-" Bad gave Good a small sap to the chest, silencing him for a moment, before placing a hand in the girls shoulder and turning her to face him. Opening his phone, he scrolled through for a moment, before offering his phone to her. Turns out he had been following her after all. Just not today. She scrolled through multiple pictures of her, all taken candidly from various places in her store. She swallowed hard and flushed red for a moment, looking up into Bad's eyes, who simply held a finger up to his mouth, demanding her silence.

"so...you were....stalking me....but you weren't....chasing me? I'm sorry I'm just really confused, am I safe or not?" Once again, Bad picked up on the subtle hint of disappointment in her voice. Taking his phone from her, he reached down and took a gentle hold of her hand, gripping it firmly, before patting Good on the back. "Oh? Is she? Ok....she's coming too I guess....sorry dear, but you're coming with us... apparently"

Just for a moment, there was a flash of excitement in her eyes, that was quickly suppressed when Good produced the rag from his pocket and clamped it over her face. "sssh gotosleepgotosleeogotosleep"....

She woke up groggy a few hours later. She couldn't see. And her muscles in her shoulders and wrists were burning. As more and more of her senses returned to her, she realise she was blindfolded, and suspended by her wrists in some sort of binding. She let out a panicked whimper, thrashing her weakened body against her restraints and realising that she had also been stripped, feeling the cool breeze passing over her exposed body. She opened her mouth to scream, but as the noise started to escape from her lungs, fingers roughly enter her mouth, muffling her cries. The blindfold was removed.

Bad was standing Infront of her, along with Good and Neutral. Of the three of them, Bad looked the most excited behind his mask. Good looked like he'd just been told off by one of his teachers, and Neutral was in the process of cracking his knuckles in a repetitive pattern. The backs of his hands were raw and bleeding from where it looked like he'd been scratching himself.

Bad once again raises a finger to his lips, signaling for her silence, to which she feebly nodded, before Bad removed his fingers from her mouth. "I-i'm s-sorry, p-please..." She was silenced again as Bad stuffed his fingers back into her mouth. As she began to cry and sob around Bads finger tips, Neutral stepped forward and reached up, gently wiping the tears from her eyes with a handkerchief, before folding it neatly and placing it back into his jacket pocket. "So...we owe you an apology...we scared you and chased you when we didn't need to...we were afraid that Bad here was gonna come and hurt you and in the process of trying to avoid that, we got carried away....we're sorry..." Bad nodded approvingly of the apology, removing his fingers from the girls mouth and gesturing for her to speak.

She waited, confused for a moment, her eyes darting between the three of them, before finally landing on Bad. "So...so you stopped them from...well...." Bad simply nodded, before reaching up and begining to untie her binds. Letting her out of her restraints, he scooped her up into his arms, before carrying her back towards his room in the warehouse. "Th-thank you....thank you from saving me from those awful men..." Bad cooed softly, petting the back of her head as he closed the door behind them. Still naked, he lowered her into a bed, before nodding towards a neatly folded pile of clothes on the floor beside her. Her clothes. "W-wait! Why am I uh...why am I naked?..." She blushed deeply, attempting to cover up what she could as she spoke to the masked stranger.

Cocking his head to one side, he returned to the bed, sitting down beside her and once again opening up his phone, and showing her the reason why she had been stripped. Bad had taken his time with her unconscious body. There were lots of pictures of the pair of them together. Bad jerking off as she hung lifeless Infront of him. Drawing pictures in the cum that covered skin. There were even a few censored shots of what appeared to be other strangers coming to touch and grope her whilst she was dosed. Bad reached and arm over her shoulder and gave her an affectionate squeeze, before pointing to her groin and wagging a finger, suggesting that no one had actually penetrated her sexually. He had simply turned her into an exhibit. Something to show off. A trophy. He once again gave her head a soft and affectionate pat, before standing up and leaving her alone in his room, locking the door behind him.

She swallowed hard, taking a moment to process everything that was happening. After a short while, a smile began to spread on her face.

[poetry-protest-pornography]

GMM 2024 part 2 did NOT disappoint, friends.

We have Mark Pakin main character

We have FirstKhao in a not-crying show where First's character is actively pursuing Khao's (for nefarious purposes, even!) That part is literally my wishlist for them-- no crying, flirty First -- and I got it with bonus murder. And, JoongDunk as a hitman and an aggressively flirty mechanic, respectively!

We have Gem and Fourth in experimental, tense shows where they get to Act

We have a GL that looks lovely and a little heartbreak-y

We have GMM's take on Single White Female (with an excellent title)

We have ForceBook and PerthChimon going back to college with Mark and Junior (who I loved in Cherry Magic) to be in the Hot Boys Club

We have Pond and Gun in a supernatural thriller where Gun gets to be a little bananas and Pond gets to cry a lot

We have Phuwin, Force, Win and friends in a creepy period (I think) piece

We have a second chance romance with Krist as a reformed asshole and Krist as the ex who came back to help (them being in a show again was Not on my bingo card, good for them)

We have an idol romance with the LYKN boys (that will probably be a crying show)

We have Off the break up artist, featuring Godji

We have vampires

We have EarthMix Ossan's Love, which looks ridiculous

Now, for them to get made and released...

(plus! Wandee Good Day is coming soon! And we're still getting My Golden Blood! So double vampires!)

[metalbvcky]

BUILD A BUCKY BINGO | MASTERLIST

I would absolutely be inclined to do this again! It was fun mix and matching different prompts per month. I purposely only did 9 fills to get that 'some assembly required' badge 😉 Creator: Metalbvcky (BABB043) Event: @buckybarnesevents

Creator Spotlight (fic)

December Prompt: social media Pairing: Steve/Bucky Word Count: 3,567 (1/) Rating: Explicit Tags: Modern AU, Porn AU, Established Relationship, Age Difference, Daddy Kink, Top Bucky, Bottom Steve

Lazy Evenings (moodboard + drabble)

December Prompt: social media Pairing: Steve/Bucky Word Count: 100 Rating: Gen Tags: Modern AU, Fluff, Romance, Sharing Clothes

A Snowy Getaway (ficlet)

January Prompt: polyamory Pairing: Steve/Bucky/Natasha Word Count: 481 Rating: Gen Tags: Canon Universe, Cabin Fic, Snowed In, Crack, Fluff, Team Bonding, Fourth wheel Clint

The Lost Footage (fic)

February Prompt: fingering  Pairing: Steve/Bucky Word Count: 2,034 Rating: Explicit Tags: Modern AU, Porn AU, Established Relationship, Age Difference, Top Steve, Bottom Bucky

A Daddy's Himbo - Chapter 2 (fic)

March Prompt: rimming Pairing: Steve/Bucky Word Count: 3,631 Rating: Explicit Tags: Modern AU, Exes to Lovers, Getting Back Together, Dom/sub, Kink Convention, Dom Bucky, Sub Steve

A Bed Cluttered with Rosebuds (fic)

April Prompt: role play Pairing: Steve/Bucky Word Count: 4,785 Rating: Explicit Tags: Modern AU, Established Relationship, Domestic, Dom/sub, Subspace, Top Steve, Bottom Bucky

There's No Cure for Love (moodboard + synopsis)

May Prompt: hurt/comfort Pairing: Steve/Bucky Word Count: 256 Rating: Gen Tags: Modern AU, Medical AU, Hurt/Comfort, Doctor Steve, Patient Bucky

I Think We're a Pizzeria Now (There Doesn't Seem to be Any Marinara Around) (fic)

June Prompt: inconvenient attraction  Pairing: Steve/Bucky Word Count: 7,526 Rating: Mature Tags: Shrunkyclunks, Canon Divergence - Post-Movie: The Avengers (2012), Mob AU, Opposites Attract, POV Multiple, Mob Boss Bucky, Crack

[theredengineapologist]

the blorbo little diesel rusty for bingo PLEASE im so mental about them

Rusty! I like Rusty! I think they're very neat. When I was watching the fourth season, they were the only one I really grew attached to. Skarloey was cool, and Duncan I eventually warmed up to later. But I always liked how Rusty was so nice and helpful. Plus they look really cute! So small and square!

Finding out they were originally intended to be gender neutral in the TV series was really neat too. I honestly wish they had kept that. Nobody can stop my nonbinary he/they Rusty headcanons though lol

Btw shoutout to my mutual @sandgambler for drawing the coolest version of Humanized!Rusty I've seen to date.

While we're on the topic of the narrow gauge engines, I feel the need to re-do my Blorbo Bingo board for Duncan, as my opinion on him has since changed.

I don't know what caused this sudden shift but after he got more focus episodes I started to grow and like him more. I have been enlightened as one might say.

[merlinbingo]

Feels like it's only yesterday I did one of these, but here we are again, another month down.

We're halfway through the year and through the round, and so far we've sent out 149 cards. 71 participants have created at least one fill, nine have a bingo, and two have filled every square on their card and come back for more!

June is always a busier month for fills, and this year is no different - we got a fabulous 72 fills by 29 wonderful participants. 52 were fics, 14 were artworks, two were fics and art, and then we also got a podfic, a reclist, a gifset and a playlist!

Just as June tends to be busier, we tend to get a wider variety of ships this month as well, which I for one think is an excellent thing. There's the usual suspects at the top of the list (merthur at 29 and gen at 17), the rarer-but-still-reasonably-common-for-bingo pairs (Gwen/Lancelot, Merlin/Gwaine, and Merlin/Lancelot all at three, then Arthur/Gwen and Merlin/Morgana both at two), and then 13 different ships with just the one fill, which you'll find with other the other fills below the cut!

As always, fills are sorted by ship and then by rating, and we encourage you to check out the warnings and practice self-care before clicking on anything that might not work for you. Now, go give these lovely people some love!

Gen/no ship

Merlin's new clothes by Ace_Teagirl Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Gift giving, arguing, apologies, emotional hurt/comfort, canon era Summary: Arthur offers Merlin new clothes to celebrate the third anniversary of Merlin becoming his manservant and best friend. But things don't go as planned, when Arthur makes a rude comment about Merlin's current clothes.

black swan morgana by kairennart Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: digital art, black swan (movie) au Summary:

the weight of the world by mechup Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: panic attacks, hurt/comfort Summary: Merlin always deals with his panic attacks alone, until one day Arthur finds him in the middle of one.

[Podfic] Some Angels Don't Have Wings by Milky_Etoile Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Introspective Arthur Pendragon, Sick Merlin, Post-Episode: s02e13 The Last Dragonlord, Arthur Pendragon-centric, Podfic Length: 10-20 Minutes Summary: Arthur always has the best luck in life-and-death situations. He was aware of exactly why this was the case. - Set after s02e13, in the aftermath of the dragon's attack on Camelot.

Untested Fear by TheManTheMythTheLazy Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon compliant, POV Arthur Pendragon, Introspection, Light angst Summary: Arthur's relationship with his father was doomed from the start, but not for the reasons he thinks

4th Entry-M3 by theartsylillipad Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: merlin, bbc merlin, merlin bingo, mordred, Summary: For this prompt I depicted Mordred with a dark green background for the villain color motif. I combined dark colors with one of Mordred’s quotes and used that as a subtle second light source to the backlighting.

5th Entry-M4 by theartsylillipad Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: merlin, bbc merlin, merlin bingo, morgana, blueprint Summary: For this prompt I created a blueprint of Morgana’s hut.

I believe you by HadrianPeverellBlack Rating: General audiences Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: Canon compliant, Gwaine protective, POV Gwaine, POV Merlin, Merlin needs an hug Summary: Why did Gwaine look for Merlin, when he was searching any clues for finding Gaius? This is the scene we were robbed of.

Main Character Syndrome by Sage_Owl Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon Era, Crack, Breaking the fourth Wall, inner dialogue Summary: The most important character in BBC Merlin tells a little of their story.

ace gwaine by kairennart Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: digital art Summary:

Dinosaurs have feathers (and other things that shouldn't be real) by TheManTheMythTheLazy Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Modern Era, Alternate Universe - Modern Era, angst, immortal merlin Summary: Merlin was sentenced to life in prison before the Saxons conquered Camelot. Now in the modern age, he has been released on parole in the middle of a policy v. human rights shitstorm. While everyone debates the merit of a life sentence for an immortal, Merlin is realizing he must live in a world he's only seen through a window.

If I Just Lay Here by Sage_Owl Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Daemons, Self-reflection, nightmares, period-typical violence, POV Morgana Summary: Morgana contemplates her future.

1st Entry-C5 by theartsylillipad Rating: Teen Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence Major tags: bbc merlin, merlin fanart, famous art recreation, bbc morgana, uther pendragon Summary: For this prompt I used the painting Jael and Sisera by Artemisia Gentileschi, and chose Morgana and Uther as the subject matter. I’m super happy with the final product as the prompt, artwork, and original painting all work cohesively and translate really well to Merlin.

Who pays the price for revenge? by archaeologist_d Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: canon, dragon's call, introspection Summary: Mary Collins plots revenge for what Uther has done, and if Helen of Mora got in the way, so be it.

No Match for Morgana by archaeologist_d Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: pre-canon, canon compliant, BAMF Morgana, swordfighting with Arthur, kidfic Summary: Morgana had had enough of that prattish squire, Prince Arthur, and his hangers-on. She might just be a girl but she would show them what a real swordswoman could do.

Lightning Strike by archaeologist_d Rating: Teen Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence Major tags: angst, percival as a kid, pre-canon, grief, thunderstorms Summary: Percival’s village was slaughtered and him the lone survivor. Every time a storm hit, he remembered it all.

His Second-best Sword by archaeologist_d Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: angst, modern era, swords, merlin remembers Summary: The other archaeologists were all excited. They’d found a sword in the Welsh hillfort, brilliant and beautiful, associated with the Dark Ages and a time of legend, and wondered about whose sword it was. But Merlin knew. It was Arthur’s second-best sword.

Gwen/Morgana

Avalongate (aka She Sells Sidhe Spells) by Malu_3 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic; Based on S1:e07 The Gates of Avalon; BusinessWoman!Morgana Summary: Morgana, on the eve of a big launch for Pendragon Cosmetics, has a dreadful dream about Arthur being attacked by a strange woman. Is it the result of too much Blue Stilton, or a true vision of peril to come?

Elena/Mithian

I'll be your Emmylou by willowsmarika Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: autumn, changing of the seasons, modern!au Summary:

Elyan/Mithian

Merlin Bingo Round Three - Prompt: Elyan/Mithian - Fill: 3 (+1) Recommendations by Malu_3 (but I'm @penaltykeks on tumblr where this is posted) Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Summary:

Merlin/Gwen

Mergwen as a Playlist by Crimson_Fanfic_Writer_7 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Playlist, Platonic Feelings, Romantic Feelings Summary: It's just a playlist lol

Arthur/Gwen

spectacles of brilliant burning lights by Milky_Etoile Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Post-Magic Reveal, Caring Arthur Pendragon, Everyone Loves Merlin, Golden Age Summary: Almost a year after Merlin revealed his magic and months after the repeal of the ban, Arthur wonders why Merlin still rarely does magic outside of combat situations and direct requests. The answers lead Arthur to arrange for magic lessons–for himself and for Merlin. This is a story of acceptance and of a love that nurtures like a warm, guiding light.

The Cool Kids by queerofthedagger Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Modern Setting, Bi4Bi Arwen, Pride Parades, Coming Out, Minor Internalized Biphobia Summary: Eventually, she pulls pack, holds the face paint up in question. He’s always beautiful, she thinks as he nods, but never more so than when he is brave. The blue and pink and purple suit him as if he was always supposed to wear them.

Merlin/Morgana

A puppet in your hands by HadrianPeverellBlack Rating: Teen Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: Redeemed Morgana, Mind control, Merlin &Morgana friendship, cour sorcerer Merlin Summary: Morgana kidnapped Merlin and controlled him. What will happen to the future of Camelot?

The Prophecy, Ch. 103: Courtly Love by VikingSong Rating: Teen Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, Contains mentions of blood and injuries (not particularly graphic), references to past torture (also not particularly graphic), and a nauseatingly cheesy ‘love letter’ Major tags: Slow-burn romance; fake love letters; political intrigue; hurt/comfort; everyone knows about Merlin’s magic Summary: The latest chapter in this long S2-divergent fic contains a coded message disguised as a love letter which Arthur (who’s a disinherited fugitive) sends to Gwen in Camelot. Gwen and Morgana are working on an escape plan for Merlin (who is currently imprisoned in Camelot’s dungeons for sorcery and treason after being captured while protecting Arthur). Meanwhile, Merlin is recovering from serious injuries and having telepathic conversations with Morgana in which they dance around their unacknowledged feelings for one another.

Gwen/Lancelot

but thinking is a dangerous thing by lit-in-thy-heart Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon Compliant, Missing Scene, Light Angst, Hugs Summary: Following Lancelot's flight after he and Gwen are rescued from Hengist, Gwen allows herself to finally reflect on what could have been.

2nd Entry-M1 by theartsylillipad Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: merlin, bbc merlin, merlin bingo, merlin fanart, gwen/lancelot, Summary: For this prompt I based the style off of Disney’s Sleeping beauty, and used Gwen and Lancelot as the main pair.

A sunny day with friends by Laevateinn Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: slice of life, Modern AU, Pride, fluff Summary: “Stop moving, you idiot!” Chuckles resonated around Gwen, and she shook her head. She looked around at her friends, scolding them wordlessly, then turned around to face Gwaine and try to apply the finishing touches to his makeup. The sun was high, the air was crisp, Gwen and her friends were at Pride, currently sitting on the grass, waiting for the parade to start.

Ygraine/Uther/Nimueh

kingdom come undone by mechup Rating: Mature Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: pre=canon, power play, tentacles, bondage Summary: She felt her most powerful in moments like this one. How could she not, when she had the king and queen of Camelot on their knees before her, completely at her mercy?

Merlin/Arthur/Gwen

Not a girl, not a man either by Ace_Teagirl Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Non-binary merlin, queerplatonic Merlin/Gwen/Arthur, fluff Summary: Merlin comes out to Gwen and Arthur

Gwaine/Merlin/Percival

Sleepover by KingAni Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Summary:

Merlin/Arthur/Knights

Becoming Melody - chapter 3 by HadrianPeverellBlack Rating: Teen Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: Queer Themes, Morgana is a good friend, BAMF Merlin, Protective Gwen, Merlin & Morgana friendship, Summary: Merlin is tired for all the jokes the knights made about him Morgana had a simple solution

Arthur/Elyan

Queers of Camelot by King Ani Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Summary:

Mordred/Percival

Treasure by Malu_3 Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Alternate Universe - Canon; First Meetings; Episode s05:e02 Arthur's Bane Part 2; Post-Episode s05:e01-02 Arthur's Bane Summary: For most men, the mines of Ismere yield nothing but misery and despair, but that is about to change.

Gwaine/Lancelot

Pride and Liberty Guiding The People by Stelle Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: fanart, pride art Summary:

Gwaine/Percival

Can't help falling in love by Ace_Teagirl Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Falling in love, first kiss, not actually unrequited love Summary: Percival reflects on how his love for Gwaine is unrequited, before he is proven wrong and they kiss

Merlin/Leon

What's Presented in the Mirror by thetreeofwillow Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Pride, Trans Merlin, Ace Leon, body image issues, Modern Era Summary: Pride reminds Merlin of all he has to love about his appearance.

Merlin/Lancelot

lancelot helping merlin get aithusa by kairennart Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: digital art, canon au, mercelot week Summary:

shade lancelot by kairennart Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: digital art, episode: lancelot du lac, angst Summary:

and the ghosts that we knew by Imagined Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Episode Fix-it, Angst, Happy Ending, Magic Revealed, Canon Divergence Summary: “I lost him,” Merlin says quietly, and bows his head as the tears prickle annoyingly at his lashes. One of them drops into his stew; it ripples for a moment, and he stares at the dish. He isn’t hungry, really. “He would have wanted for you to be happy,” Gaius says, his voice kind and low. Merlin feels as though he’s a wounded animal, hiding away in the corner and shying away from all hands that want to help him—he can’t be helped. Lancelot was his friend, and Merlin couldn’t lose him, but he did. Or: Lancelot walks through the veil and towards his death. So everyone thinks, at least, until Merlin finds him trapped in the world between life and death. And there's very little Merlin won't do to get him back.

Merlin/Gwaine

6th Entry-M5 by theartsylillipad Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: merlin, bbc merlin, merlin bingo, merwaine, merlin/gwaine, Summary: Merlin and Gwaine huddling for warmth

A day together by HadrianPeverellBlack Rating: General audiences Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: Surfing, Established Relationship, Gwaine being Gwaine, Modern Era, Fluff Summary: Gwaine and Merlin enjoy some time together

Call me your friend, treat me like one by HadrianPeverellBlack Rating: General audiences Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: Dysfunctional Relationships, POV Gwaine (Merlin), Hurt Merlin (Merlin), Episode: s05e07 A Lesson in Vengeance (Merlin), Ambiguous/Open Ending Summary: Gwaine had only had one great friend in his life, Merlin. But had he been an equally true friend to him?

Merlin/Arthur

3rd Entry - M2 by theartsylillipad Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: merlin, bbc merlin, merthur, merlin bingo, Summary: For this prompt I depicted Merlin healing one of Arthur’s wounds.

Not Mine to Keep by Stelle Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: flowershop au, art with story Summary: After that, it became a regular thing. Arthur was visiting once a week, asking questions about flowers at first then it turns into them chatting, insulting each other sometimes and joking, laughing.

If you love me let me hear you by HadrianPeverellBlack Rating: General audiences Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: AU Lawer, Pining Arthur Pendragon, Getting together Summary: Merlon has a problem with notes. Arthur has a problem

And If It Isn't My Love by Sage_Owl Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Modern Era, Demisexuality, feelings realization, Evil Uther Pendragon, first dates Summary: Merlin, fed up with a string of miserable first dates, decides to put his feelings first and take some time for himself. His feelings have other plans.

Back on Track by kirani Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: idiots to lovers, mutual pining, modern au Summary: Everyone knows Merlin and Arthur have been dating for ages, though no one is exactly sure when they got together. But suddenly Merlin is giving some guy at pub night his number and Arthur is clearly trying not to freak out and Gwaine has no idea what is going on! Or: Gwaine resists the urge to smoosh his best friends' faces together like Barbies when he finds out they haven't actually been dating for the last five years

if you were just to hold me by Imagined Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Sickfic, Hurt Merlin, Getting Together Summary: “I think he’s awake,” Arthur calls out, and the noise bludgeons Merlin’s head like a hammer, and he presses his eyes closed as if to force away his ability to hear as much as his ability to see. It doesn’t work well for him, and he chokes on a breath. His throat is on fire as he starts coughing. Gods, he’s ill. He thinks he’s very ill.

When the Abyss stares back by feuxx Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: merpeople!au - size difference Summary:

The Poet Arthur Pendragon by diaryofamadtheatermajor Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Fluff, Humor, Idiots in Love Summary: Arthur writes Merlin a poem

A Burst of Love That Blinded Every Angel by Mischel Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: established relationship, fluff, light angst, alternate universe - angels Summary: Angel!Merlin canon AU. In order to be with Arthur, Merlin had given up everything. He’d given up his magic, his wings, and even his voice. The last one seemed like a cruel joke from his brothers and sisters in the sky, but Merlin loved Arthur more than his ability to speak, so he’d accepted it and kept the sadness to himself. For years, he’d lied to Arthur and pretended to be a normal human, but he can’t pretend anymore. Today, a month and a half before their wedding, he finally tells Arthur the truth.

it bent in the undergrowth (the road less taken) by Imagined Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Found Family, Modern AU, Demisexual Arthur Pendragon, Getting Together Summary: “We have a system for borrowing books, you know,” the librarian says. Merlin, his name tag reads. There’s a little smiley face behind his name, and Merlin leans over the counter to take the book out of Arthur’s hands. Arthur stares back, stone-faced, as Merlin looks at the cover. “I hope you enjoyed it, at least, if you went to all the trouble of stealing it.” “I don’t—” Arthur says, and presses his lips together. “It was fine, I suppose. If you like that sort of thing.” Merlin snorts. “What’s that, gay people?” Or: When Arthur comes out to his father, he loses everything. And then he meets a messy-haired librarian, and learns that there’s so much he never had.

A Non-Believer’s Guide to Magic by Sage_Owl Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Circus, modern with magic, angst with a happy ending, powerful Merlin, Bad Parent Uther Pendragon Summary: Arthur's experiences with magic, and how one pair of gold eyes ends up changing his life.

happiness blooms from within by slantedknitting Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Love potion, hanahaki Summary: On a hunting trip, Arthur and Merlin save a young princess and her father from bandits. Under pressure from his father to prove himself worthy of the throne, Arthur decides to pursue the princess, but she has plans of her own. When those plans unravel, it’s Merlin whose life is at risk.

Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match by archaeologist_d Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: fluff, canon era, fairies as matchmakers, Merlin is not amused Summary: Two fairies, the evil twins Merlin called them, were hell-bent on matchmaking their way through Camelot. Unfortunately, their first targets were Merlin and Arthur.

All That I Can (And Can't) Have by lavender_spice Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Soulmate AU, Self-Discovery, Mutual Pining Summary: When he was just a boy, Arthur was made to cover up his soul mark by his father. Soon, everyone else in Camelot followed along the trend, and by the twentieth anniversary of Arthur’s birth, there was nary anyone in Camelot who showed off their soul mark. And then a village boy with far too much righteous confidence for his own good tried to fist fight Arthur in the lower town and somehow, that changed everything.

Spit it out (Jot it down) by kirani Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: epistolary, mutual pining, court sorcerer merlin Summary: Arthur and Merlin make an attempt to be more appropriate in the eyes of the court by turning to notes instead of arguing out loud as much. It goes about as well as you’d expect.

No one and nothing, chapter 9 by archaeologist_d Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence Major tags: canon au, magical reveal, BAMF Merlin Summary: Merlin saves Arthur’s life in front of the whole court and has to run for his life. But when Arthur shows up, asking for help, what was Merlin to do, say no?

So Take Me Somewhere by queerofthedagger Rating: Mature Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Modern AU, Friends with Benefits, Breaking Up & Making Up, Queer Themes, Angst with a Happy Ending Summary: Arthur has known for a while that he's bi. He's known for about as long that he finds Merlin attractive, too. They are friends though, and there are a hundred reasons why they cannot happen, no matter what Arthur otherwise thinks about it. Alternatively: a beginning, a fuck-up, and some hard-won reconciliation, told over the course of four weddings and one funeral.

Solstice by archaeologist_d Rating: Mature Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: modern au, solstice, stonehenge, arthur wants to take the edge off Summary: Merlin takes Arthur to Stonehenge to watch the sun rise on the Solstice. Never mind that Arthur had some ridiculous notion about orgies and standing stones and the rising sun.

match made in (heaven) by radioactivesunflower Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: idiots in love, attempt at humor, one night stands,masturbation, arthur pendragon is a little shit Summary: the one where merlin is a matchmaker and a big fat lair arthur likes to spend most of his time annoying merlin a love story between a matchmaker and client that share a past only one knows about

Worshipping You From The Darkest Of Corners (Like I'm Practicing My Own Private Religion) by lavender_spice Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Cyberpunk AU, Priest AU, Explicit Smut Summary: In a world ruled by the authoritarian organization who call themselves The Church, cold and emotionless PRIEST agents keep the public pure and obedient. But when Merlin and his group of rebels capture one of said agents, a special bond forms between Merlin and their captive. A bond that might lead to something previously thought impossible – turning one of The Church's most loyal servants to the rebel side.

Knots of Blood by SauraUnderscore Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: A/B/O Dynamics; Parenthood; Mystery-AU; Drowning; Angst with Happy ending; Explicit Sex; Knotting; Summary: Mordred’s birth was difficult. The first few weeks of their son’s life were the most challenging in Arthur and Merlin’s own. Not only did Merlin and Modred share the most powerful magic ever seen until now— but the pup hates his father’s Alpha smell. He yells and cries every time Arthur is near. So when Modred disappears one night from his cradle, Merlin accuses Arthur of murdering his own child.

The Symbols of Life and Death by SauraUnderscore Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Serial Killer AU; Dystopia AU; Mild torture; Corpses; No real Bloody descriptions; Minor Character Death; Explicit Sex; Hurt/Comfort; Mentions of earlier Prostitution (Merlin); Soul Bound; Magic Sex; Summary: All Arthur wants is to protect Merlin from the serial killer that is threatening the magical community. But Merlin doesn’t need Arthur’s protection. Who does Pendragon think he is? Just because when Merlin needs a lawyer, he pays his debt fucking him, doesn’t mean he’s going to get attached to no one else but the son of the one who started this fucking nightmare for the magical kin.

when doves cry by radioactivesunflower Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence Major tags: dark merlin, dark arthur pendragon, mob boss arthur pendragon, serial killer merlin, dark power couple Summary: when vigilante but mostly serial killer merlin is kidnapped by the all powerful mob boss arthur pendragon he is given a deal he can't refuse

In the Car by diaryofamadtheatermajor Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Anal Sex, Porn With Feelings, Oral Sex, Car Sex Summary: Merlin and Arthur have sex in their car

A Balanced Equation by SauraUnderscore Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Oblivious to lovers; Modern AU; Slight Sickness; Protective Arthur; Fluffy Fluff; Explicit Sex; Summary: When an informatic problem erases half the data of the most important project of Pendragon Co., Merlin and Arthur stay three days to recover their work. It does no good to the recurrent rumours of them being dating. Which is not true. Not at all. They are too immersed in their job to realise how stupidly in love they are with each other.

The Pool Boy by SauraUnderscore Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Explicit Sex; Unsafe Sex; Slight Non-Con; Dirty Old men; Morally Grey Arthur; Could be seen as Prostitution (Arthur) Summary: Cenred believes everything in his mansion belongs to him and exists for his pleasure. Business is done on the terrace, eating delicious foods, drinking expensive wines and ogling the young, almost-naked employees. One day Merlin, Cenred’s pool boy, has company at the pool. A young, half-naked blond: Arthur Pendragon.

What a Stud by mooonwaffle Rating: Not rated Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: mutual pining, crushes, flirting, nose piercings, tattoo parlor Summary: After years of waiting, Merlin finally schedules an appointment to get his lip pierced. Though, crushing on the body piercer was not part of the plan, nor was walking out with his nose pierced instead because a hot guy claimed it would look cuter on him.

[darkmasterofcupcakes]

Raven and Robin from Teen Titans for ship bingo! I liked their 'we're both angsty teens but we make each other happy' vibes

Honestly, I kind of love this ship the more I think about it? I feel like they have a lot of meaningful reactions, especially in the fourth season, which I think is where a lot of people started to consider whether or not they actually shipped them.

The only real reason I don't ship them is because I love Robin and Starfire way too much, and I couldn't see any real believable reason for those to break up/not happen in order to make Robin and Raven become a thing.

....Then again, I do kinda like the idea of Raven and Starfire too....

Breaking news: new polyship just dropped.

[brambletakato]

Hai!! Emmy for the ask game??

OUG THATS A BINGO!!! (Azran Legacy spoilers)

So I would've filled out the fourth top square if it wasn't for the fact that I did like Emmy as a character, though I never really went too deep about her until recently. I already stated some things I think about elsewhere outside of the blog, but for those that don't know I'll go ahead and put it all down

Emmy makes me fawkin cry man,, Even though the stuff I do think about isn't explicitly canon, there's still the implications that kinda do hit home, especially regarding her relationship with Leon. It's obvious that she loved him as a parental figure, but that doesn't excuse the amount of hurt that he tries to nudge (or sometimes shove) Emmy into doing. She'll do as he says, but with gritting teeth and a pained look.

There was probably a time where Leon did care too, but his goal became a priority rather than the (in her pov) family that he forged. If he needs to sacrifice somebody that he has watched over since their youth, then he would do so with a grumble, and it's all Emmy knows to follow. Because even in the worst, she still sees the man that at times cared for her with genuine affection.

To be honest, if you lay out her backstory even though we're just given vague details, it's just tragedy after tragedy. She loses her father, then is adopted by a guy which soon finds herself into what's essentially a cult, and through what may be the only genuine friends she had she had to choose a side. And no matter what side she chose, it would hurt. Her only moments of a warm and happy life was crushed by her own hands.

Even though she does head off to be a "normal girl" and absorb herself within her passionate hobby, the shit she has been through is so fawkin sad and it just :((... There's also the fact that her life is still not completely back to normal, and it might never be that way.

She had to abandon both worlds and start her own from scratch and a camera.

I really really hope she gets a therapist and a warm blanket with her favorite tea ever and all the friends she could want because GOD... GODDDD... :(((((((((((

[nightshadedawn]

Shade's Masterpost

About Me

Hello, hello, hello! Please call me Shade! I accept use of all pronouns, but I do have the most fun with fae/faer, they/them, and ve/vir. I identify as queer simply because I could apply too many labels to myself. The one that takes up the largest part of my identity is my asexuality, so that's the only one I'll name. (I prefer sir to ma'am if you're going to use one, or captain if we're trying to be gender neutral, which I also accept, as it makes me feel like a pirate, which I am)

I've been strongly in fandom since 2014, a little late to the game compared to some! Especially since I always seem to be getting into fandoms as they're dying out. 🤣 My main contributing factors to fandom are fanfiction and videos, and occasionally rants and shitposts, but I'm not terribly good at either of those. But I tend to hang onto all my fandoms, revisiting them occasionally just to check on how they're doing, so I can't fully say I've ever left one. Speaking of, let's list some of those out for you.

My Fandoms

Free!

Haikyuu!!

Yuri on Ice!!!

Ouran High School Host Club

Voltron: Legendary Defender

Banana Fish

Boku no Hero Academia/My Hero Academia

Sk8: The Infinity

Buddy Daddies

Persona 5

Persona 4

Fire Emblem: 3 Houses

Spy x Family

Obey Me!

Percy Jackson

Studio Ghibli

Good Omens

Mythology (Greek/Roman, Norse, Egyptian, Native American, anything else I can get my hands on)

Fairy Tales (og Grimms, Hans Christian Anderson, etc... not Disney things)

Musicals (Phantom of the Opera, Hamilton, Dear Evan Hansen, a plethora of more, please ask if you'd like to know!)

Our Flag Means Death

House of the Dragon/Fire & Blood (wasn't a fan of Game of Thrones)

Is that it? I think that's it for now. I have only written... for about half of them. Read for many. Most of my fanfiction is composed of anime fandoms, not going to lie about that. But I am always up for being prompted! Speaking of, let's look into the prompts.

Writing Prompts

How it works: You can send in a prompt of your own making, or you can choose one from these lists.

300 Words

Fire Emblem 3 Houses Bingo

More lists will be made regularly, and I'm always looking for prompts, especially around the holidays.

Choose one of the fandoms I know, send me a prompt, and we'll get jiggy with it. You can get more detailed, too, adding in what ship you'd like it to be for (I ship many, many things, and have often been convinced to write for ships I don't particularly care for, so don't hold back), or an AU if that's your thing. (It's certainly mine, I like AUs) If you specifically want it in cannon, might specify that too.

As a side note here, I use my Non-Binary Glossary for when I write nonbinary characters. Feel free to use it, and read through it if you see any words you might not immediately realize what they mean when I'm writing them.

My Tumblr Projects

You can find my fanfiction here at NightshadeDawn, but as I've mentioned, fanfiction isn't all I do. Let's dive into some of the other things I do, hm?

Persona 6: Genesis

A fan concept for Persona 6. An entire blog dedicated to it, with posts going through the entire plot of the game, character art created, maps planned out, and various other little things. It's been sort of put on the back burner, but it's still fun to look at sometimes.

Obsidian Sea DLC

A similar concept to Genesis, but so far faring better in the fact the actual story of it is in the works of being written. It's a hypothetical DLC for Fire Emblem: Three Houses that introduces three brand new units as part of Jeralt's Mercenaries, and makes Jeralt playable to round out as their fourth. The main plot of the DLC sees Jeralt's Mercenaries, Byleth, and their students going to Brigid to uncover the reason why people keep coming back from the dead with white hair and crests, then proceeding to turn into Demonic Beasts.

Verdant Wind: The Musical Twin AU

A series of videos edited in such a way that comes across as a musical retelling the story of the Verdant Wind route of Fire Emblem: Three Houses. With the idea that there's various parts that are incorrect either due to being lost to history or because of... "artistic vision."

The Gemini

A Persona 5 fangame that adds a social link for Shiho Suzui, making her a romanceable character while exploring her trauma and how she's growing as a person. Technically playable, but incomplete in my vision.

Ultimate Decades Drama

A collection of mini challenges for players of the Sims 4, specifically the Ultimate Decades Challenge. As I'm only a console player, I struggle with playing the challenge itself, but I love watching playthroughs. I heard a few people talk about struggling with stories or directions they wanted to take Sims, so I thought "Hey, I can tell stories. Let's see if I can translate that into something helpful."

Frequently Asked Questions

Technically, I have not had any of those yet. But I see this being updated every so often, so it's fine to leave this here.

In Conclusion...

Sifting through the reblogs, the anime stuff, the mild ramblings... be prepared for what you'll find if you continue down this blog. But you've made it thus far, and for that, I applaud you.

If there's anything you'd like to support, I do have a Kofi though I will be honest about not entirely knowing what I'm doing with it.

But now that you know all my deepest, darkest parts... is there anything else you'd like to know?

[sagemoderocklee]

...and that's another year of writing done!

Happy New Year's, everyone! Can't believe we've gone through yet another year of a pandemic (despite what government's around the world tell us about it being over).

This year was a strange one. The later half of the year feels like such a haze for me, days bleeding together, much like they did in 2020. Why? Because, after two years of being as safe as possible, I caught Covid. And not only did I catch Covid in early May, I was one of the lucky ones to get Long Haul Covid, and with that I have spent the last half of 2022 on a medical leave.

It's been a difficult year for me. There are very few things about 2022 that went according to plan--between catching Covid and simply not having the money, my plans to move to Ireland at the end of this summer didn't happen, and while the plan is to postpone my move, to when is still to be decided. I have also let my sewing and portfolio building fall to the wayside, largely--again--because of my health.

However, there are some things to be happy about and this post is my chance to look back and celebrate my writing victories.

sagemoderocklee's 2022 Fic Wrap

Absolution: Part IV (WiP)

While the goal had been to end the year with another update, tragically it was not in the cards. My health being what it is and my focus being on completing other projects, and Absolution being the huge piece it is, I felt it made more sense not to try pushing out Part V. However, I am very happy I was able to start the year with an Absolution update as this fic is very much one of my faves. The fourth part of this fic was a bit of a challenge to write, especially in the middle, but I finally hit on the beats I really needed. A big complication with Absolution was that the remaining 6 chapters, which I had fully planned and plotted, needed tweaking... which is to say Absolution needed to be longer. So I had to move all the plotting I had from Part IV on and rebuild and entirely rewrite each chapter/scene-by-scene breakdown. I'm pretty solid at the moment with Parts V through VIII in terms of plotting, and now I think I can safely say this fic will be a total of 13 chapters (the last one being an epilogue), but that could change since I still have to finish all the restructuring. I know all the key beats and the end goal, but sorting out the getting from one point to the next is really the big issue. However, all that being said, I do want to start the new year with Absolution, so that will be my top priority for January!

Pomegranate Sun: Ch1 (WiP) Co-authoring with @ghoste-catte

The first chapter of this fic I started writing a couple years ago, sometime after I got the prologue from @ghoste-catte. And then, of course, I stopped and didn't touch it again for... ages. But with the Naruto-Run last December and @ghoste-catte wanting to have a special fic for the big milestone of 100 GaaLee fics, it was time to work on this baby again. It is absolutely no surprise that when I get to worldbuild I'm in my comfort zone, so even though it took a while, once I got into working on this (while sick with covid, no less) I was happy. And this is going to be such a fresh piece of worldbuilding since we're bringing in OCs from the far west of Wind Country!

Plus One (COMPLETE)

So, I signed up for a bingo challenge and ended up writing a slightly spicy one-shot. Certainly not the spiciest thing in the world, but I very much enjoy writing flirty!Gaara. I have a LOT of feelings about the way fandom and even the canon blank period treats him surrounding sex/sexuality, and it's really informed a lot of how I view and approach Gaara as a gay male character. This wasn't like a huge piece (though I have an even sexier sequel planned), but it was so much fun.

It Eats Your Heart: Ch2 (WiP)

Chapter 2 of IEYH took me about a year to write. I was struggling. It gave me writer's block. It made me wanna throw my computer. My roommate helped me workshop it a bit. And it still took me forever to finish it. Then finally--FINALLY--I hit on what was missing. This chapter was a fucking bitch, but gotdamn was it worth it. I'm so happy with how this turned out and I'm so looking forward to finishing this fic in the new year.

Pearl-Filled Lungs: II, III, IV, Epilogue (COMPLETE)

My beloved enemy. This fic sat for three years, untouched and miserable. I'd started chapter two... last year? The year before? I don't remember, and it languished. I think it was just the first scene--maybe just part of the first scene. But god it was a struggle. I signed up for the WiP BB last year, but dropped. Signed up again this year and... committed. Largely because of the artist who, though unable to complete art for this fic, was such a huge inspiration. The WIPs they sent me... I wish I could share them because they were stunning. When they were unable to continue, I really thought I'd give up, but once again @ghoste-catte inspired me to continue, thanks to their generous offer to make banners for my fic--and the banners are truly such a work of art! And someone... I got through this fic. I think my original vision comes through, despite how much I bitched and moaned during the process. I wanted to write a fairy tale, and I did. And honestly, I am happy with P-FL. It's not my most popular fic, by any means, but it will always hold a special place in my heart.

My Home is Your Home: Ch1 (WiP)

And here we have a fic that was meant to be a one-shot. I was gonna try and get this done in under 10.5k for an event challenge, but then I talked with my roommate and... they looked at me like 'bitch who the fuck do you think you are' and you know what, they were right. I was foolin myself. This fic wasn't a one-shot. I'd come up with an idea for something much bigger than a one-shot, and I'm glad I listened to them. So instead of an event challenge, I reworked everything and turned this into a fic for the @puregaalee Horror Fest, and I am sooooo excited that I did. Paranormal Romance isn't a genre I've dabbled in, and I'm stoked to try weaving the horror genre with RomCom elements. This fic not only ended up being a much bigger piece than I'd intended, but it also has a planned sequel! Because I wouldn't be me if I didn't add more WiPs to my docket than I subtract.

Blood on the Branches: Ch1 (WiP)

Talk about a fic that was pulled out of my ass at THEE last minute. For Horror Fest, I was struggling to come up with an idea. I knew what prompts I was vibin with, but damn I couldn't think of a single thing. And then one night, laying in bed I came up with an idea.... An entirely different idea from this because with only days left to finish, I scrapped everything I had (and by scrapped, I mean moved to a different document) and came up with something completely new! And so instead of straight horror, I leaned into what I'm good at and now I have a horror/adventure story! While the original concept for this fic is good, I am way more excited about this! Once again, taking my worldbuilding to new heights as we leave Suna and head to the south of Wind! I don't know exactly when I'll be able to get the next chapter out, and I really need to sit down and plot this in full, but I am so excited to write this story!

The Corn Maze House (COMPLETE)

Well, it was a bit of a slog towards the mid-point, but I got through it. I honestly worried I wouldn't, but in the end I'm really glad I didn't give up or give in to feeling negatively about the writing process for this piece. I'm not fully happy with it, but I am happy it's done. The premise for this fic, in my entirely unbiased opinion, is very good, even if I'm still not sure of the execution. I may end up going back over this fic in the future, but regardless I'm happy to have a completed horror fic under my belt, and also to not be adding another WiP to my roster. Definitely very light on the GaaLee, despite being an established relationship, but that was kind of how it had to be, so I'm sure this won't be like a crazy popular fic, necessarily. But I still think this was good practice with the horror genre.

Return to Sender: Ch1-11 (COMPLETE)

Talk about a fic I never expected. RtS was meant to be a simple, cute lil RomCom. A dash of miscommunication, a whole lot of comedy of errors, and just a smidge of drama... The ask prompt that started this definitely did not make any indication that I needed to write a 90k+ drama about homophobia in the shinobi world or about the mistakes you make when you're terrified of losing someone important to you. But I simply am the person I am, and I am the writer I am. This was the direction that felt right, and honestly, I'm so glad because I am so happy with how this story turned out and the reception this fic has received is truly astronomical. I dove into it following completing chapter 1 of PomSun and in between working on P-FL because P-FL was the struggle it was. RtS gave me a much needed break and the first three and a half chapters were such a breath of fresh air. When I say those first three chapters were a breeze to write, I mean I think it took me less than a week to write them. This was (sort of) the first time in over a decade I've had a fully completed multi-chapter fic that I can post on a schedule, and GOD it felt so good to just post chapters weekly. RtS Sundays were the highlight of my week, and even though towards the end there were a lot of complications, it was truly such a joy and has made me want to work harder to get fics done before posting. Also! Not only did I have a ball writing this fic, but I also had a lot of fun making the images that I included in it and the soundtrack to go with it. While some of the images are... less exciting than others, this fic just felt like the perfect opportunity to do some mixed media stuff, and I do really enjoy making soundtracks for fics. I have to say, though I love so many of my fics, RtS will now have a very special place in my heart. The reception, surpassing 1million with it, and just the way it all fell into place... I am truly so filled with joy by how this fic went.

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Total WiPs at the start of 2022: 16 Total completed works: 4 Total new works: 5 Total updates: 21 Total new words: 186,296 Total words (Ao3): 1,011,369 (-2,521 PomSun = 1,008,848) Total WiPs at the end of 2022: 17

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2022 Resolutions

The difference between this year's writing and last year's is kinda wild ngl. All that time on medical leave and not sewing really gave me a lot of time to write, (though I do wish I'd been healthy enough to sew more). Looking back at my writing resolutions from the start of the year to now, I can definitely say I'm proud of what I've accomplished, even if it seems like I didn't reach that many resolutions. The two biggest resolutions (1million words and finishing P-FL) were reached, and honestly hitting those two goals was the greatest accomplishment of the year.

So, while most of what I'd had planned for this year was updating fics from last year's Naruto-Run to 1K which didn't happen, I still think this year was a success!

Reach 1million words--168,358 words to go!✅So, the math I did at the end of last year for how many words I needed was actually wrong. I needed closer to 178k, but despite this minor math mishap, I not only reached 1 million words, I surpassed it! I have been trying to hit this overall word count for the past three or so years, and I am utterly shocked, amazed, and proud of myself for making it happen this year! Admittedly, I think this goal was reached because I ended up getting long covid and have spent June through the end of the year out of work and home. Still, this is by no means a small feat, especially given the number of words I needed to reach this year while also being disabled by covid. Long haul is no joke and the brain fog--ohhhh lemme tell you! that shit got me so fucked up, so managing to power through and find joy in writing in spite of that struggle was really important. Writing was one of the few real joys I had in my days these past months, and I could not be more thrilled to finally say I've surpassed 1 million words. Truly, I owe most of that to RtS, the most unexpected fic of 2022.

Write the sequel to Flyweight Love❌Not Reached. Part of me was sure I'd get this done at the end of the year, following Horror Fest, but RtS became priority #1 instead, so HB3 will be on the docket for next year!

Finish IEYH❌Not Reached. While I didn't reach this goal, I did manage to update this fic, finally. Chapter two was a difficult journey and actually caused a lot of writer's block for me between the end of last year-early this year, so while I didn't finish this fic I did still make progress and for that I am very happy. My hope is to accomplish this goal in the new year now!

Finish Pearl-Filled Lungs✅REACHED! This is a pretty big one because it's been hanging over me for... long time. Three years, in fact. But I signed up for the WiP Big Bang and managed to actually get all four chapters written, edited, and published! It always feels like such a relief to be able to cross something completely off my list, but especially something that's been weighing on me the way P-FL was. In many ways, I wasn't happy with the journey, but I am happy with the end of it. I think P-FL is a lot better than I give it credit for, so I am really proud of it and proud that I got this finished.

Finish The Passing of Things❌Not Reached. I was actually really hoping to get this done, so I'm going to make this a goal for next year!

Update Absolution (Ch 4-6)✅❌❌Partially fulfilled. While I did not get three updates in for Absolution, I still got one so that's a partial win for me!

Update TAoL (Ch12)❌Not Reached. Sadly, this update was not in the cards for me this year, which is truly a tragedy for me because it's been two years since the last time I updated. But unfortunately, this next chapter has a lot of issues that need fixing, so getting through has not been easy. However, it is a top priority in the new year!

Update TBotDatP aka the Ballad❌Not Reached. Another fic I was hoping to update, but alas, not this year. But the first chapter is very much underway, so with any luck, I'll be getting a Ballad update out in short order!

Update WNNBYT aka the Hanahaki fic❌Not Reached. While this is a fic I'm excited to work on, it has lost priority in favor of other fics. Maybe next year, but I don't want to make it a resolution since I have fics I'd rather focus on over this.

Update Pomegranate Sun (Ch1)✅ Reached! Amazingly, I was able to get chapter one of this fic out, though it did take a while. However, I'm very proud of how that first chapter turned out and excited to continue this fic with @ghoste-catte in the new year!

Update 13S❌Not Reached. I did get a good chunk of the next update for this worked on, but tragically the amount of worldbuilding needed for this chapter put a wrench in my plans to move forward. However, the worldbuilding has been done in large part, so I am looking forward to getting this fic updated next year!

Edit Alliance❌Not reached. In general, Allied Nations has not been on my mind or at the top of my list. I think, more than likely it won't be until I get TAoL finished, as that's a similarly huge project, even as a stand alone story.

Update Honor Bound❌Not reached. Similar to the above. And while I do have the first three chapters written, I don't want to dive into posting any more chapters of this fic until I've edited Alliance and made the changes to it I know are needed.

Resolutions Reached✅: 3.5 Resolutions Not Reached❌: 9.5

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2023 Resolutions

With 2022 at an end and a lot more writing done than I expected, I'm hoping to carry that energy into 2023, regardless of other things. I do hope to move to Ireland and get back into sewing regularly, but as my health has changed much of my life, I'm also anticipating more time at home as I shift into working from home. So with that, I hope I also find more time and energy to focus on writing.

This is a lot, and I do not expect to get all of this done, but the goal is to get as much of it done as I can. I have a lot of motivation, so here's to a successful writing year in 2023!

Complete IEYH

Complete Absolution

Complete MHiYH

Complete TPoT

Update 13S (3-6)

Update TAoL (12-15)

Update PomSun (Ch3)

Update TBotDatP aka The Ballad (Ch-4)

Update TEA (Ch1)

Update TCoS (Ch1)

Update BotB (Ch2)

Publish the sequel to Flyweight Love, HB3

Publish The Beautiful Beast of Cāngdì (Ch1)

Publish A Cat's Guide to Finding Love

Complete at least three more MFBingo squares

[crystalelemental]

Alright, this upcoming week should be datamine. Here's the bingo board, because I am bored.

Psychic with Fast Ramp - We are two years running with the bait units being Psychic types with Fast-ramp. This feels very assured.

Victor Alt - Feels like a safe guess. Unless there's a wild swing from nowhere (PLEASE), it's Victor.

Paulo Playable - There will be at least one event outside of Galar VA, and the safest bet is Paulo Resolution. It's been a while since an OC got into the game, and Paulo is long overdue at this point. Feels very likely we see him added.

3* Flying Gear - We've gotten a new one every month lately, and I want that trend to continue. Do Flying next, cowards.

Legendary Gauntlet - Been a while. We were supposed to have one this month, but nope.

Variety Scouts - The worst possible outcome of whatever happens that isn't Galar VA.

No Select Scout - When did we last get a Select Scout? Masters is going the way of FEH. No guarantees, but here's some bullshit in a randomly assigned pick. Paid gems only. The game is getting worse about this.

Shadow Rider Calyrex - I feel this is very likely, at least on thematic focus. They tend to skew legends, and Shadow Rider Calyrex is a really cool option, because of Spectrier. I don't particularly care who gets it, so long as it's not Victor.

Nessa Dynamax - Like how Brendan got his mega, I think it's time for adding Dynamax retroactively. I realized after finalizing this that she's actually Gigantamax, but I'm not going back to fix it.

Peony Gaming - This is the wild swing. Bring Peony in to talk to Rose, let him be the second half of Galar VA. Just give me the olds. Peony, Opal, and Kabu. Please. I want this more than Gloria. I'll whale for it, DeNA, you can trust me.

Opal Time - Same as above, but more critical. Do you know how jarring it is to go through a Neo Champion event, where Hop and Marnie get to be close with the people most connected to them, and Bede's mentor isn't even in the fucking game? DeNA, fix this.

Hop Second Potion MPR - Grid expansion theory. Hop is going to be Sonia-esque. Patch up what she does that he can't. Double Potion MPR is the most critical aspect of this.

BAIT - I mean. Anniversary in September.

Leon Alt - Feels relatively safe, though please consider Peony.

Hoenn Appears Nonetheless - This goes hand in hand with Variety Scouts, and is at least likely. Maxie heralds further Hoenn focus. So far, we're 3 for 3 on the rerun Master Fair predicting the next set of alts. Will there be a fourth?

SS Leon Grid Expansion - The antithesis to Leon Alt. SS Leon really needs the expansion, just like Gloria. He's not...great.

Gloria alt - The single most likely outcome. Consider Peony.

Raihan Gigantamax - He'll be the PokeFair lodge rotation unit, because he gets Gigantamax.

SS Leon Rerun - Ties with 16. He's never been rerun. Almost 2 years.

Hop TM Barricade Buddies - This would be the swap. Sonia does speed, Hop does mixed bulk. I'd like to see it.

Corviknight - Fully expected. If we get 3* Flying Gear, it's guaranteed. Corviknight is a very popular Pokemon, and if Hop gets an alt, possibly even his Lodge alt (though I'd like Wooloo for that), Corviknight is destined.

When Drasna? - If we get another event, maybe it can be the Kalos E4 finally showing up. Sincerely, where the fuck?

Regidrago - In the Gloria/Victor/Leon timeline, this is the Regi I'd rather see. Eleki is less interesting, and we don't need Electric.

Caitlin Alt - The good outcome is that this happens in the style of a Dojo Gloria/SS Korrina event, just before anniversary. We know Caitlin sold well in her Halloween alt, DeNA. She's profitable, just do it. The worst outcome is Variety Scout.

Valerie EX - There are no Galar pairs lacking EX. It has to be a story mode pair. Please, DeNA. Please. My girl is suffering so badly, and you will not help her.

[addicted2coke-theothercoke]

I wasn't tagged but wanted to do this anyways

Used Downfall cause it has the most ideas worked out

If we're playing with four corners then I got double bingo

Some of them I wasn't sure I understood but I think I did

Explanation cause I wanted to do it:

Everyone has trauma - pretty simple, everything is terrible and Ruere is often the worst(unless you live in the Silver City, Seolfor insures things are good there so his nonstop party for life isn't interrupted)

Mental illness my beloathed - not sure I understand this one, think it just means the characters have mental illnesses. Seolfor deals with histrionic personality disorder, which is part of why he built the life he did, to make it easier on him. And Alius could be said to have antisocial personality disorder, but he's an alien, so I don't think he does

The process of grief - lot of grieving in the books, and the main story only happens because of mistakes made in grief

World building - self explanatory, there's been a lot of world building, that might take too long to fully explain though

Bi4bi - pretty sure that means a bi person in a relationship with a bi person. It's pretty clear Michael and Seolfor used to have a thing going on, and while not dating in the story, seem a little interesting in being together again, before they unfortunately start arguing

Just regular torture - I'm sorry for what happens to your Felix

Oops it's a series now - yeah Downfall quickly become a series instead of a book during the plotting stage

Magic - decently high fantasy with lots of different ways to cast magic, though most aren't very good at it

Assassin's, hitman, and murderers oh my - all the bad guys are murderers, and so is Michael, and Seolfor, and the Witch Thief, and Colpus, and Felix, and Sean, and Cullen

SFF - Sci Fi and fantasy right? That's what that means? Well this is a fantasy so?

Big ass monsters - Michael killed some giants in his time

Queer rep - think that means representation? Which yeah you'd get with Seolfor, Michael, Felix, and Cullen. Actually, kinda funny story. Cullen was originally a character named Athena who was a girl, and she had the love interest of Felix. For some reason, I don't remember why, during my fourth attempt to right the thing, Athena became Cullen and I started having more success (it was probably for unrelated reasons). Despite that change however, I never switched Felix in my notes, so I just decided, why not, Cullen is gay now

Found family - Sean and Cullen with Michael, plus Seolfor and Felix and the Witch Thief and the run away Skel

Writing Trope Bingo

ALRIGHT gonna try and kickstart a new tag game now I guess! I'm gonna go ahead and credit @duskforged for creating this card format and finding the website as well.

Rules: Either download the blank copy or go to BingoBaker and fill out a card with the tropes and elements in your WIPs. Tag as many people as you like and see who can get a bingo!

Mine is:

I'm gonna go ahead and tag everyone who interacted with the original post and soft tag some of my mutuals as well! @ryns-ramblings @authoralexharvey @jadiealissia @kaylinalexanderbooks @akiwitch @kckramer @hesperos-xi @puttingwingsonwords @digital-chance @rainbowcoloreddays @teafuelledwritng @spookyceph @mikathewriter @riveriafalll @vesper-roux @pandoras-comment-box @alecthewreck @somethingclevermahogony @simonnebethel @star-ch4ser @televisionjester @shadow-of-tea-and-tea @elsie-writes @toragay-writing @jezifster @starlit-hopes-and-dreams @oh-no-another-idea @hallowedfury @asassydork @blind-the-winds and an open tag for anyone I missed!

Blank card will be under the cut!

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[lannister-slings-and-arrows]

Chapter Two of Like Lovers Do

The fourth in a Rafael Barba/Reader/Frederick Chilton threesome verse written in collaboration with @pascalispretty . Mood board also by the lovely and talented @pascalispretty !! Yep. We did this. Was it necessary? No. Did we enjoy it? Sometimes. Are you going to read it? I sure hope you do and that you like it! Like all of the stories in this series, this can definitely be read as a standalone work. Cross posted on ao3!

Part Four of the series So Much Easier than You Realize

For @thatesqcrush 's Sexy and Smutty Summertime Bingo, fulfilling the Double Penetration square.

Chapter One: A Little Like Devotion Chapter Two: All Wound Up Chapter Three: Just So We're Even

Warnings: well porn, lol. sex: anal (f. receiving) and vaginal, double penetration, sass and snark, Fred being officious, kissing, dirty talk, fingering (vaginal and anal), safe sex practices, Rafa unable to help being a bit of a jackass but ultimately being a sweet nice boy Rating: Explicit. (porn, porn, porn) Word Count: 5429 Summary: Learning the value of compromise results in a very nice vacation and a few fantasies checked off of Fred and Rafa’s lists.

Rinsing your hair out, you give yourself more reasons to try this: it’s Fred’s fantasy and, after all, he'd listened when you and Rafa had told him it was absurd to fly to the Caribbean or a Pacific island for four just days. And he had driven the two of you for six hours just to get here. Maybe he deserves a reward.

Your mind made up, you’re careful to clean up for what you’re planning. Once you’re done, you step out of the shower and wrap yourself in one of the towels. Fred had given you another for your hair, but Benn has a hairdryer discarded on his countertop, so you use that.

One your hair is dry enough that it’s not dripping water everywhere, you perfunctorily towel yourself off before wrapping it back around you. By the time you get back to your room Fred and Rafa are curled up on the bed together, having made it halfway through dressing before taking a nap clearly proved a more tempting prospect.

“C’mere.” Rafa pats the sliver of mattress that they haven’t occupied, not even bothering to open his eyes or lift his head up. Instead, you make your way to the foot of the bed and let the towel fall to the floor. You turn your back to them to rifle through your suitcase for your own moisturizer, content to let them come to their own conclusions in their own time while you finish up.

You’re sitting on the end of the bed, just about to wipe off your hands on the towel you had dropped, when the leg you’d been sitting next to vanishes from the corner of your eye and you hear the comforter rustling and someone sitting up.

“You’re naked.”

“Thanks, I hadn’t noticed,” you tease Rafa, not deigning to look over your shoulder and smiling instead at the framed photograph of a city skyline hung on the opposite wall.

“You’ll catch your death with that wet hair you know; it’s not really spring yet,” Fred informs you in his ‘I went to medical school’ voice.

“See, I always thought that was a myth. I mean, germs don’t magically manifest themselves when your body temperature drops to a certain point, right? Unless I missed more of sophomore biology than I thought I did staring at the back of Ryan Jacobs’ head.” You do turn around to face them then, your smile widening at the scowl on Fred’s face.

“That’s not really what I meant, or how that works, actually--” Rafa covers Fred’s mouth with his hand and asks,

“Have plans to stay this way or were you just torturing us before you put on clean clothes?”

You frown, thinking, and shrug.

“Oh, I dunno. Depends on what better proposal I get, I suppose.” You smirk at Rafa. “Got anything for me, counselor?”

Rafa smoothes his face into a nonchalant expression of studied indifference. He sighs and offers,

“I guess I could be persuaded to fuck one or the other of you. Since you both look so bored. Honestly, I’d be doing you a favor putting some excitement into your monotonous lives…” He can’t hold back a smile any longer when Fred pushes his hand away and glares at him.

“I have a better proposition,” he tells you, kneeling up and reaching for your arm. You let yourself be tugged all the way onto the bed and crawl up the mattress between them, settling on your ankles and raising your eyebrows, waiting for him to continue.

“I’ll fuck you because it’s one of the things I want most in the world, always. I am constantly thinking about being between your legs with your warm cunt around my fingers. Or my tongue. Or my cock. Even watching Rafael fuck you would go miles towards saiting my desire to spend hours breaking you down piece by piece and see you shuddering on my bed.”

You stare at Fred, opened mouthed, having completely lost the thread of your plan for the rest of the night. Rafa clears his throat next to you.

“Uh, yeah, I think he might win this one,” he concedes, hand tracing chaotic patterns on the soft skin of your back. Fred dips down to kiss you but you back off.

“Mm, no, as much as I really love the sound of that…”

Fred sits back and raises an eyebrow at you.

“He conceded, I clearly won that contest,” he points out to you, arrogant to a fault.

“And it was gorgeous and an excellent suggestion,” you admit, trying not to smile at his pompous tone, knowing it would ruffle his sensitive feathers. “But I have a better one.” You lean a little closer to him, until your lips are brushing the shell of his ear. “I want you to fuck me. I want you both to fuck me. Wouldn’t you like that, Fred?” You feel the shiver that runs through him and back off a little.

“Tell me too,” Rafa grumbles, aiming a swat at your backside. You want to roll your eyes at him, but instead you give him a little smile.

“Fred asked me a little while ago how I’d feel about the two of you double teaming me. I was just wondering if he was still interested.” Rafa sits bolt upright, palming at a handful of your ass as he scans your face.

“I’m interested.” Rafa digs his fingers in a little harder. “I’m very interested.” Fred runs his hand along your side almost appraisingly.

“Do you have any preference as to who goes where?” Instead of waiting for a reply, he dips his head down to press kisses over your breasts.

“I’ll let you decide that one, Fred. As a reward for bringing us here.” You comb your fingers through the hair at the back of his head, a thoughtful hum vibrating against your skin as Fred ponders your question.

“I want to be able to see your face,” he murmurs against your breasts as his hand slides between your legs. “I want you to keep my cock warm for me while Rafa stretches you out, want to be able to feel him pushing into your ass.” His thumb finds your clit and traces a circle around it. “Can I? Will you let me?”

“God, yes.” You sound breathless already as Fred rolls your clit under his thumb, and you clutch at his shoulders.

“Get the lube, will you Rafael?” Fred manages before he wraps his lips around one of your nipples, sucking and dragging his teeth carefully across the sensitive flesh. You whine, gripping tightly at the tee shirt he’d put on after his shower and trying to pull it over his head. He lets you tug it off him and immediately reaches for you again, sliding a finger inside of you to work in concert with the thumb on your clit. You dig your fingers into his hair as he plays with your cunt, his teeth still brushing your nipple as he licks and sucks.

You open your eyes to see Rafa, fantastic ass on display in those tight boxer briefs he loves, bent over Fred’s bag rifling through clothes and sundries before finally standing with a soft “ah-ha!” His skin glows in the late afternoon sun streaming through the window behind him and you shiver and smile, running your fingers through the soft dark strands on Fred’s head, content and excited, and still a little surprised with these two beautiful men of yours.

Rafa catches you looking and stops, standing in the warm spot in front of the window, his back to the breathtaking view of the ocean offered by this back bedroom, and he smiles softly at you.

“You are breathtaking like this,” he informs you wonderingly, sunlight turning his dark hair into a golden halo around his head. “The both of you.”

“You aren’t so bad looking yourself,” you pant, fighting to keep your eyes open and your knees underneath you as Fred’s fingers unerringly find every spot inside of you that makes you want to roll over and beg.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” Fred grumps, lifting his head from your breast just long enough to find the other one.

“Don’t tempt me,” Rafa mutters, still staring and luxuriating in the warm sunlight on his bare skin, smiling at the two of you. You feel Fred jerk against you and he bites down a little harder on the skin around your nipple. Rafa winks at you and abandons his sunning spot to come back to the bed with the lube in one hand and the other palming lightly at his cock.

“How do you want us, Fred?” he asks, climbing onto the bed next to the psychiatrist and slapping his ass companionably before leaning over him and kissing you deeply. You moan a little into the kiss, trying to take a deep breath through your nose as Rafa’s tongue licks past your lips into your mouth. Fred lets go of your nipple with a soft wet sound and stays there, panting, with his face resting on your breasts as the two of you kiss above him. His fingers still in your cunt for a moment and he wraps his free arm around your waist, hugging you closer to the warm bulk of him.

“Why don’t I lie back against the pillows, and you can lie on top of me? Rafa should be able to touch you like that,” Fred murmurs against your breasts, rolling his thumb over your clit again. “How does that sound, sweetheart?” He moves his fingers a little faster, and you sag against him as he presses against that spot inside of you.

He makes you come almost embarrassingly quickly, your face buried in the crook of his neck as the wave of your climax washes over you, radiating out from your centre until your toes curl and your fingers clutch a little harder at Fred’s back.

“Good girl.” Fred is gentle as he moves his hand from between your legs and shifts backwards, taking you with him as he leans back against the pillows. “Isn’t she, Rafael?”

“Our sweet, perfect girl.” Rafa, his cock half hard against your backside, runs his fingers down your spine as you settle yourself over Fred. His fingers slide lower, moving until they’re just under your thighs. “Kneel up for a moment while I get these off Fred.”

You do as you’re told, glancing down to see that Rafa has stripped his own off at some point, and you smile to yourself when you feel Rafa press a kiss to the nape of your neck. Fred runs his fingertips gently up your thighs and along your ribcage, stopping when he gets to the undersides of your breasts.

“Rafa’s right.” Fred shifts underneath you as Rafa eases his underwear off. “You’re such a sweet girl.” He pulls you in for a kiss, his fingertips still brushing gently up and down your sides in rhythmic patterns that make you sigh against his soft lips.

When you settle back against him, you can feel his hard cock pressing against your cunt. You give an experimental flick of your hips and shudder when his length slides against your sensitive clit.

“God, I could watch you slide that cunt along his cock all fucking day,” Rafa groans behind you, giving your ass a quick smack. You do it again, only for Fred to lean back with a smile on his face.

“Enjoying yourself there?” Fred rocks his hips a little under you, letting you relish in the drag of his cock against your cunt. He looks so handsome underneath you in the soft afternoon light, and you lean down to kiss him again in lieu of answering.

You feel Rafael wrap his hands around your hips, his fingers pressing against the old bruises that are littered there, and you hum contentedly. He lifts you up a little and Fred wraps his fingers around his cock to guide it to your entrance.

Rafa controls your movements, letting you sink down slowly onto Fred’s cock. You groan as Fred splits you open, your nails digging lightly into his chest once he’s finally buried to the hilt. Fred pulls you down until you’re lying on top of him, your head tucked under his chin.

It’s not the first time you and Fred have done this; you’ve taken naps with him like this on more than one occasion, his cock inside of you while you sleep against his warm bulk. Rafael palming at your backside while you lie like that is a new feeling, however, and you whine as his fingers dig into your flesh.

“God, you’re so warm and wet and perfect,” Fred mumbles against the top of your head. “Why didn’t we get tested sooner?” You have to agree, the feeling of him inside of you with no barrier only makes you feel closer to him, makes the position feel more intimate.

“You sure, sweet girl?” Rafa asks, sitting back to watch as his big warm hands pull your cheeks apart, giving him the perfect view of your cunt stretched around Fred’s cock and the tight spot he’ll soon be pushing into. You tremble at the cool air against you and the thought of Rafa staring at you there and grip Fred a little harder. You nod your head, your cheek rasping against the hair on Fred’s chest.

“I’m so sure, Raf, please.” Freds hands are stroking up and down your spine gently and you feel his every breath underneath you. With the sunlight streaming in through the big windows of his bedroom the two of you could be taking another one of your naps with each other. Rafael just sits there behind you, hands kneading your ass, watching for a few more minutes before he does anything, and even that--Rafael unable to not touch, not fidget with some part of you or Fred--isn’t anything entirely new.

You’re so relaxed on top of Fred that you don’t hear Rafa open the bottle, but you definitely feel the cold shock of the lube as he drizzles some between your cheeks. You jump and swear, shuddering as you feel it drip down over where you and Fred are connected and then moan softly and shift around on top of him as you feel Rafa’s finger drag up from your cunt to rest over your hole.

“So responsive,” he murmurs, not even trying to conceal the smugness in his voice. You want to respond, you don’t want to give him the satisfaction of having the last word, but then he starts to circle his finger--feather light and tantalizing--and you can’t do anything but whine breathily, turning your face to bury more fully against Fred’s warm chest.

“Shhh,” Rafa soothes, finger pressing no harder as he circles and strokes. No matter how many times you do this with the two of them it still feels like… like something forbidden. Wrong, secret, and so so good.

You hear the deep rumbling purr of Fred groaning under your ear when you clench around his cock as Rafa pushes a questing, experimental fingertip inside of you and that only encourages the hot feeling low in your core. Rafa leaves his finger there, the rest of his hand just resting on your skin, and lets you breathe for a minute, getting used to the stretch. It doesn’t feel that much different from when they do this normally, but you know as soon as he gets it in further…

Fred breathes steadily under you and Rafa’s finger pushes in ever so slightly more when he leans forward to place a soft gentle kiss to your ass cheek. Your pleased hum quickly turns into a yelp when he is unable to resist taking a quick hard bite, and you feel the smile on his face against your skin before he pulls back, taking his finger with him.

“What would you say to teeth shaped bruises right on your ass?” he asks speculatively, finger circling your hole once more, another finger swiping up some more of the lube to bring it closer.

“Rafael, really?” Fred asks from beneath you, and you can practically hear his eyes rolling. “Why don’t you just tattoo your name there while you’re at it?”

The hitch in Rafa’s breathing is the only warning you get before his entire finger suddenly pushes into you.

“Fuck--” you both groan simultaneously.

“Fred, Christ, not the time to say things like that,” Rafa admonishes, a little out of breath as you squeeze around his finger, whining and breathing hard.

Now it feels different. Whereas you normally feel just a little full, with his finger in you along with Fred’s cock you feel so stuffed that it’s a little hard to breathe. You can nearly feel one or the other--or hell, maybe it’s both—of them in the back of your throat and you were not expecting it to be quite like this.

Rafael’s fingers are big, but god, this is still just only one finger.

“Too much?” Rafael asks.

You take half a minute to answer him, feeling every line and ridge of his knuckle and suddenly feeling even more of Fred’s cock in your cunt. Eventually you decide that this is fine, you can do this, and you nod decisively.

“No, I like it. Keep going.”

Rafa shifts on the bed, finger still inside you and wiggles it a little. You gasp and dig your nails into Fred’s sides, causing him to hiss and curse quietly. Rafa pulls his finger slowly out of you and you feel the cold drip of more lube against your skin before he presses two fingers to you again. You stiffen on top of Fred and Rafa grumbles deep in his chest, words inarticulate, and pets your ass with his free hand.

“Shh, no, relax darling, that’s it,” Fred praises quietly, fingers kneading the muscles of your back till you melt on top of him. Rafa gently presses the tips of both fingers against you and pushes in again, humming when you whine as they slide in.

“God, Fred. I swear I can feel you through her.” Rafa curls his fingers just a little inside of you, angling them downwards. You shiver on top of Fred, Rafa’s words making something that already feels forbidden downright taboo. He works you open with his fingers, his free hand gripping your hip tightly.

“Good, sweet girl. Are you going to let Rafa give you another?” Fred pets at your hair gently, kissing your head when you can only manage a whine. “Sit up a little for me, I want to see your face.” It takes you a moment to oblige; every time you shift, Fred and Rafa are jostled inside of you, the barest movement sending sparks shooting in your core. You manage to prop yourself up on your hands even as your arms shake.

Fred moves his hands to help, wrapping them around your waist to support you as you try to hold yourself up. You feel Rafa drip more lube over you and you hiss.

“All green, sweetheart?” he asks, the tip of his ring finger pressing against you. You nod but you know he will settle for nothing less than verbal confirmation.

“Green, Raf, just--just slowly.” You know it’s an unnecessary addition; you’re hardly being rushed as it is, but he always likes and asks for clear boundaries. When he starts to press the tip of his third finger against you, you have trouble relaxing at first; you clutch at the sheets and clamp down on Fred and Rafa.

You wail when his finger finally pops past that tight ring of muscle to join his other two, your eyes closing so tightly that your face hurts. He stills immediately, and when you manage to force your eyes open again Fred is looking up at you with concern.

“Green, green, ‘m fine. Just so full.” You’ve never felt like this before. It’s overwhelming, like Fred and Rafa are the only things holding you together and the things that are trying to tear you apart. Experimentally you rock your hips, and nearly headbutt Fred as your arms give out, all of your other muscles going slack so that the ones in your core can tighten.

“God, Rafa, if you thought she was tight before--” Fred manages, sounding more than a little breathless as his hands clutch at your back. Rafa shuffles a little closer to you, his cock hard against the back of your thigh as he patiently works you open. You’re only capable of soft whines and little whimpers as he drizzles more lube over his fingers to push inside of you. When he’s satisfied that you’re thoroughly stretched and prepared, Rafa leans his head down to murmur to you.

“Can I, sweet girl? You ready for my cock?” he coos, mouthing along your neck. You nod frantically, gasping when Rafa wraps his free hand around your shoulder and tugs you gently back.

“Fred, can you…?” he asks, and Fred quickly moves one of his hands to your hip and the other to your shoulder, pushing gently to help hold you up enough that he can see your face. You look down at him as you balance your weight on your arms and watch the muscles in his flex. He smiles softly at you.

Rafa lets go of your shoulder and you hear more lube come out of the bottle, and you feel his arm move behind you and hear the wet noise it makes as he spreads it along the length of his cock, stroking a few times and groaning softly.

“Rafael, really, now is not the time,” Fred admonishes, and you grin at the scolding.

“I don’t tell you how to fuck someone, I’d appreciate it if you’d extend me the same courtesy,” the lawyer grouches from behind you, shuffling closer. You feel the blunt head of his cock, slippery with probably too much lube, bump against you.

“Color,” he orders, voice deep in your ear and going straight to the tight, boiling place where Fred is seated deep inside you.

“Green,” you reply quietly, feeling more than a small flutter of nerves in your stomach. You relax your fingers in the sheets just long enough to bunch more of the expensive cotton between them and grip hard again.

“Relax. Breathe out.”

And Rafa takes his cock in his hand and pushes gently at you, holding his breath as the head slides achingly slowly inside of you until it finally passes the tense muscles and settles.

There should have been a pop or something, you think hysterically, not breathing and trying not to panic. Like in a cartoon. This deserves a sound effect if anything ever fucking did.

“Take a breath, breathe,” Rafa growls, closer to you now, holding still, and radiating heat against your back. Has he always been this warm?

“Dear fucking god,” Fred croaks underneath you. “Rafa, Rafa, Rafa…”

“Fred, color?” Rafa sounds like he’s barely hanging on himself and you still can’t take more than tiny, gasping breaths, your thoughts flying all over the place

What does the word full even mean?

“Green,” Fred replies, quickly. “I think.”

“You think or you know?” Rafa starts to pull back and you cry out. He stops moving again.

“Wait, yellow, hold still,” you pant, finding the words buried deep inside some part of your brain that you’d managed to forget existed in the past fifteen seconds.

All three of you stop moving, and stay there panting and connected. Words are slowly coming back to you the longer you’re able to convince your lungs to inflate to their entire capacities and yet you still couldn’t describe what you’re feeling right now if someone held a gun to your head.

“Green,” you finally manage. Fred takes a deep breath under you and echoes that same color. Rafa pulls back until he’s nearly all the way out of you and pauses again.

“Take another breath and let it out. Fred, you’re going to draw blood if you don’t readjust your grip on her.” You look down, careful not to jostle either of them, and see Fred’s short nails digging into the skin over your hip. Any pain there hasn’t really registered yet, but he moves his fingers anyways, careful as always.

“Look at me, sugar,” he requests tenderly. The green of his eyes is soft. Soft and gentle like the water of the lake you grew up next to as the water got shallower near the shore. It’s heartbreaking, the way he looks at you sometimes.

“You’re amazing,” he states matter of factly and you can feel yourself blush. You drop your eyes to his collarbone and he tuts at you.

“Let me see you.”

Rafa pushes his cock back in so slowly, first the head, and finally a couple more inches of the shaft and you whine, gripping Fred’s sheets, holding his eyes, sure that you’re going to implode, fall apart like an improperly cared for building.

“Breathe,” Rafa repeats and you feel your heart fluttering about as fast as a bird’s.

It’s so goddamn much.

“Fred, I can feel your fucking cock against mine and it’s just...'' Rafa trails off and squeezes your shoulder urgently, clearly wanting to pace the three of you and starting to have some difficulties.

You and me both pal, you think to yourself and can’t decide if you want to laugh or cry.

Naturally you do both.

“Green,” you whimper preemptively, seeing the frown on Fred’s strained face. “Green, green, green--God, Fred, your eyes are beautiful,” you babble, embarrassingly, hoping neither of them remember that later.

Rafa grunts and pulls back, shuddering. Fred looks up at you, overwrought.

You feel more lube dripped down between your cheeks and over your hole and Rafa praises,

“Oh, my darling, precious, lovely girl, you’re doing so, fucking well.” He pants for a few seconds, resting his head between your shoulder blades. “Once more for me, can you do it? Are we still green?”

You nod fast and deliberately relax, staring into Fred’s eyes and seeing that water again. Remembering it hit the breakwall over… and over… and over, hearing that soft lapping sound...

Rafa moves forward again and finally, he’s seated all the way inside of you, only a thin wall separating his cock from Fred’s.

The first time you went on a rollercoaster you thought you were having a heart attack. The thrill of the view from the top would have been enough of an experience to make the day worthwhile, but then you plummeted almost all the way back down. Through the rush of adrenaline in your blood and the way that gravity conspired with acceleration to make it feel like you were flying out of your seat the most all encompassing thing you perceived was breathlessness. It was like for ten seconds a huge hand came along and simultaneously held you down and reached into your throat to constrict every organ in your body. You felt the air leave your lungs at the same time that you were sure you’d never feel something as amazing.

This was like that all over again. You feel the same weightless, gravity defying acceleration breathlessness with their cocks inside you and it is glorious.

“God, you were right, Fred,” Rafa pants, his breath hot between your shoulder blades. “Why didn’t we ditch condoms sooner? Fuck, the way the two of you feel--” he cuts himself off, mouthing kisses against your skin instead.

You’re aware that you’re shaking in between them, but you don’t have the wherewithal to stop. It’s like they’re cracking you open all the way up to your ribs, your every nerve ending feeling exposed and raw as they do nothing more than lie there and breathe with you.

After a long moment, Rafa gives the smallest, experimental flick of his hips. Loud groans rip out of the three of you in unison, the sounds melting together in the humid air. When he does it again, you cling helplessly to Fred and bury your face against his shoulder.

“Such a good girl--” Rafa croons, his weight shifting off your back as he moves to kneel behind you instead. You let out a juddering moan as his movement shifts his cock inside of you, and you feel his hand splay against your lower back.

“How does she look, Raf?” Fred asks, rocking his hips ever so subtly underneath you now that he no longer has Rafa’s weight holding him down. Your breath hitches; the two of them are barely moving, but you feel like you could come from the barest touch from either of them.

“God, Fred, she looks perfect,” Rafa grunts, wrapping his hands around your waist. With Fred holding your hips, the two of them are able to move you between them, their hips moving in concert with their hands as they reach for their own resolutions. You feel like you’re being pushed and pulled between them, and it’s delicious.

You continue to rest your head on Fred’s chest, not sure you have the willpower or energy to move it anyways, and every moan that rumbles up through his chest vibrates against your skin.

They have your complete and undivided attention, you can’t think of anything besides this feeling, how sturdy Fred is beneath you, how solid Rafa is behind, even if you had wanted to. Every inch of your skin feels electrified, and you’ve never felt closer to them. You can only manage choked out moans and little whimpers; you’re beyond anything coherent. The world has shrunk to the size of the bed, to the two men with you, and they’re all you’re aware of.

Neither of them last long; it’s all too new, and the way that Rafa fucks a little more desperately into you before he comes sends Fred hurtling over the edge as well. The two of them clutch at you, hands hanging on bruisingly tight, as they come with low groans and a few mumbled “fucks” from Rafa.

The three of you stay still for a long moment, all trying to catch your breath before you attempt to untangle yourselves. Fred moves his hands from your hips to wrap his arms around you and hug you close, nuzzling against the top of your head.

“Fuck, Fred--” Rafa eventually mumbles from behind you, starting to slowly and carefully ease his way out of you. “Inspired suggestion. And you, sweet girl, so amazing, you did so well--” It’s borderline incoherency from Rafa as he murmurs to you, a sign of just how dazed he is--how stunned all three of you are. You and Fred can’t even reply and just lay there.

It feels strange once Rafa is no longer inside of you. You whine at the sudden emptiness and at the feeling of excess lube and Rafa’s come trickling out of you and hitting your overstimulated cunt. You can hear him moving around, but you don’t even have the energy to turn your head.

Something is laid out on the bed beside you and the mattress dips as Rafa sits.

“Help me out here, Fred.” You open your eyes blearily to realize that Rafa has laid a towel out beside you and has a washcloth in one hand. He notices you looking and smiles.

“I think Fred would have a conniption fit if his parents’ housekeeper found lube and come stains on his bedding,” he whispers sotto voce, and Fred is too tired to even bother arguing back. Instead he slowly eases his way out of you, Rafa helping him to turn you on your back beside them. You know, even without looking down, that you must look like a mess; you feel almost uncomfortably wet and you’re glad for Rafa’s foresight.

You let your eyes close as one of them carefully cleans you off. They really do take such good care of me, you think sleepily as one of them lifts your hips in order to slide the towel out and slip you under the sheets.

“That was--you were incredible, honey.” Fred kisses your closed eyelids as he climbs into bed beside you. “Are you okay? Do you need anything? Did you like it?”

“Can we talk about it later? I just wanna sleep,” you mumble, sighing happily when Rafa presses against your other side and sandwiching you between them.

“Of course, sweet girl. We’ve got you.”