#I think they should get two cats ☝️

[hauntingjasper]

I only drew them as humans once so here's a little something

[a-hazbin-reader]

Hiii! Your headcanons and memes are absolutely funny, I think this request fits you.

So instead of dog or cat (Husker) Wife reader saw her Husband walking around with the egg boys, and she pulls out the '🥺can we keep one?' and would like ABSOLUTELY not take no for an answer, she even pulls out a new dress for the egg boi to differentiate him from the other eggs.

I loved those goofy eggs so much 😭

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Alastor being a jealous husband, Alastor being possessive of wife!reader's attention

Description: ☝️⬆️

Okay, so it's bad enough that Alastor is stuck dealing with the eggs and he's not even allowed to crack a few of them

And he's totally not annoyed with the way your eyes lit up, and you immediately started cooing over them the moment you saw them

Of course the clumsy little things just ate it up, flexing and showing off for you, even going so far as to climb into your outstretched arms

So now they're stealing his wife from him? Those eggs have crossed a line

He skipped breakfast for this?

Alastor knows he needs to keep them away from you to keep you from getting more attached than you already are

So at the sacrifice of his own needs for your attention, Alastor makes sure to keep the eggs far away from you by keeping them close to him

Even at the cost of his sanity

Alastor hadn't even realized he left one of them behind until he came back to the hotel to find you holding one like a baby

And the little imbecile is just soaking up the attention too, blissfully unaware of the error he just made

Not even Sir Pentious can get the egg to willingly leave your embrace, the little thing stubbornly clinging to you

"No! You can't sssstay with her! You're my little egg! My minion!"

It takes much coaxing from you to get the egg to leave your side but that's far from the end of it

Every morning afterwards the egg is bursting into the bedroom and crawling into bed with the two of you

Instead of waking up to your sleepy affection, Alastor is waking up to that stupid egg babbling off to you about everything and anything

Not him shoving the egg boy off the bed and tugging you against him

Alastor eats nothing but eggs for breakfasts for the next week, there's something therapeutic about cracking them that he just can't quite put his finger on

Oh wait-yes he can

He hopes that you'll get sick of the egg boy eventually, but then you start dressing the egg up, differentiating it from the others

"Alastor look! Doesn't he look darling? He's a mini you~!"

You don't notice your husband's eye twitching

You baby that egg more than you've ever babied him and he's definitely getting jealous

He just about snaps when he hears you and Sir Pentious talking about you keeping the little egg

"Aren't you a little old for those 'egg baby' projects, my dear? You're not in school anymore."

"Oh, please, Alastor! Can't we keep him? He's already so attached to me and I just adore him! I've already named him!"

"Um...Y/N...they already have namesssss..."

"I do?"

Somehow, he manages to convince you that you don't need to keep the egg but it's by the skin of his teeth

And it doesn't stop you from spending every waking moment spoiling the egg

That should be him being spoiled by you

He starts trying to intimidate the egg whenever you aren't around but the little thing is too dense to understand it

"I wouldn't follow Y/N so closely up those stairs, one wrong step and it would be quite the nasty fall for someone as fragile as you."

"Thanks Boss!"

Not Alastor trying to crack him whenever you look away

Purposefully opening doors a little too hard in hopes that your egg is on the other side

Using his staff to nudge him out an open window...

Finding extremely dangerous tasks for the egg to do only to be disappointed when he comes back unharmed

Developing a sudden interest in baking extremely large cakes

Alastor, honey, come on...that last one wasn't even subtle

Bottom line, if you care about the egg boy then you better give him back to Sir Pentious because he won't be safe around your husband

It's an emotional goodbye but Alastor's happiness at having your attention again is worth it

It's not like you won't still see each other around the hotel, chill

He's a terribly needy man when it comes to your attention but it's just part of his charm

I LOVE THESE LITTLE GUYS

[mini-minish]

m9 pirate + essek joins earlier + speedrun any% au 🏝

disclaimer these are just sillies for fun bc i wanted more pirate times please don't think too much about plot divergences; feel free to add your own ideas in the mix!

spoilers for the mighty nein

• fjord becomes a captain earlier

• caleb escapes the prision earlier

• while on the run and covered in tears and mud, he meets beauregard in one of her many cobalt soul escapes

• a lone half-orc captain with a cursed sword but no ship or crew walks into a bar, sees two anxious looking humans in the corner: a scrawny woman with a grumpy face and a scrawnier ginger with a towel to his recently broken nose

• seems easy enough.

• girls night!!! they steal their first boat

• rule #1 of stealing methods of transportation is that you should watch out for blue tieflings stowaways trying to get as far away from a recent problem as possible

• back on land they loose beau (got got by the soul ☝️😔), caleb gets locked up in a shady storage while looking for her and there he meets nott the brave

• fjord's first response upon seeing a goblin following his navigator is to pull the sword on it

• nott's first response upon seeing some green dude shove a sword in her face is to pull her crossbow at him

• they look up and down for beau, but she finds her way back to them eventually

• still, they'll need more hands if they want to keep their totally legally owned ship afloat

• still on land, The Circus Plot happens and they acquire two more crew members 🎉

• molly loves the ocean, yasha likes the wind

• all of them like to go up to the crow's nest and bother caleb, nott more than the others; eventually he stops hiding up there so much

• yasha starts getting anxious about her unfinished business at the same time jester stars getting anxious about their clothes not being pirate-y enough

• they lose their first ship (of pristine papers as long as you don't look at them in the light) and have to travel on land until they manage to borrow a new one without asking it's owner and with promises of never returning it

• they also lose molly :(

• but they get caduceus :) who's not very keen on being in a boat for long periods of time but he'll adjust

• one thing he'll have in common with the cat

• fjord has a problem: The Voices in his head telling him to get back on the water

• jester has a conundrum: they got all of these nice, proper pirate outfits but now they have no ship

• love wins

• she did get frumpkin his very own little coat

• in the night, as the mighty nein crew wispers around two pushed together inn tables, a cloaked figure approaches upon hearing they are in need of help

• dezran, or dez, for short, for friends, an inconspicuous sun elf from, you know, around these parts, who is in dire need of work and oh would your captain be so kind to-

• insight checks fly around the pushed together inn tables

• but all of them know each of them is running from something or someone, and not all of them have a destination in mind, so really it's not like they're going to ask.

• plus nott thinks she saw a really nice boat on the dock with it's lights all out

• welcome aboard!

• cue the guy running from stealing things having to steal things

• cue a disguised drow's inventory slots full of the strongest sunscreen balm he could find this side of the continent

• maybe caduceus or jester finds out first, around when ess- dez, for friends, got a little too reckless and a little too hurt some time or other

• but the wildmother shows caduceus a lonely star when he asks, and artagan hasn't been paying attention, and anyways that's dez, that's right, their friend who has been nothing but helpful and fun, if a little skittish depending on the weather, and who always tries jester's pastries

• besides, far from him being the only person with a fake identity at the function. he's not that special.

• when fjord and beau find out, they're suspicious, but they won't make him walk the plank. there's protocol for that.

• yasha is not one to question someone running from their past

• when nott the brave finds out, she doesn't ask what he really looks like

• when caleb widogast finds out, during a siege on the ship, he grabs essek's arm and sees the drow underneath the disguise, and wants to know who are you, but circumstances are that later, they'll talk about this later.

[ilovefoodandslasherswithmasks]

Brahms Heelshire x reader who is just kinda weird, like collects bones and shit. Also hates people (aside from Brahms who they absolutely adore)

OH MY GOD, okay yes totally. Idk if should write this going into spicey in the end or if you want it normal and more fluffy?? Just reply again I'll make sure to do it 🦦

(Also my first request my god I'll remember this 4 ever fr) so I'm doing it again. Let's hope it's not gonna delete 🏃‍♀️. (Update, IT WORKS SO HERE YALL GO, and here you go love since you asked for it ♡)

I'll be death itself for you.

After driving 7 hours with a heavy ass trailer behind you. You finally arrived at the Mansion you bought. In an online auction..which well is a bit questionable, thr house was cheap for its size. Condition was well not the best but it still cost a lot less than it would've. So after buying it and getting up and about, you're more than relieved when the house turned out to be real. Made of bricks, windows and doors.

"Gosh look at this place.." you exit your packed car and hold the old keys in your right.

"Yes yes I'm coming Luc" Lucifer, you're calico cat, busy scratching on the window. Surely couldn't wait to get out of the car after being stuck in it for hours with you.

Opening the door you take her leash.

"Impatient much?" Slowly making it up the stairs letting Luci smell what she felt necessary. You finally got to the door and she sat by your foot waiting. Unlocking it was a but hard, the lock seemed a bit rusty by now and when the lock finally clicked, you tried to open the door. And my god those doors! They didn't have such a huge size for nothing, they were heavier than expected. So using your whole body weight it finally budged just enough for you two to slip in.

"Pray the electricity works.." trying the first light switch, nothing, the second nothing, the third a quick flicker and then a burst light bulb. "Great" you mumble and finally decide that's a problem for the evening. Walking through the hallway and expecting the rooms with Luci was more than disappointing. Everything was dusty, one room had broken furniture, a sloppily fixed wall (hehehe) and a dead mouse in a trap in the backroom of the kitchen. A life one right next to it stuck in a saver trap. You made a mental note to go out to the woods and let the mouse go.

"Okay" you think before you pick Luci up.

"You're to slow girl, the rooms upstairs are not gonna be around all day."

Walking back into the hallway and then up the stairs, passing open doors and not finding any particularly interesting. The child's room looked so sad..and cold...almost creepy but it also filled you with the want to rebuild it as best as you can. Just because..

You settled for the last room at the end of the hall, it has a bathroom too ans the bed was amazing, so was the dresser and closet. They fit perfectly for you. You let Luci down and she imidiatly found it necessary to leave the room. And just explore again. You were fine with it thou, Luci always made sure to let you know when something was up.

"Mh...maybe I should start by cleaning...everything is old and messy..bed first"

Going to grab the old mattress and covers you imidiatly regret it. The huge cloud of dust hitting you in the face. And not just dust, it smelled horrible. You actually almost gagged while sneezing.

"Jeez need a mask huh?" After grabing a mask and some gloves, just to be sure, you finally get to work. The window were painted shut, so great, all the way downstairs and out the backdoor with the trash you go.

Hours later you finally manage to get the bedroom empty and clean, also the bathroom, which is very important ☝️.

You decided to bring up your own bed stuff mattress, pillows what not. The clothes you owned still stacked in boxes on the floor. You got yours and Luci's food...well after you decided you could carry 6 bags in one go, which cost you a stubbed little toe, a ripped open bag, and a bruised ankle.

So yeah no, one trip, was actually not enough.

You needed more than that but it's fine.

You groan as Luci just watches you gather up her spilled dry food. Luci was a diva, she wouldn't eat anything off the floor. Well this food was gonna end up in a bowl soon after anyways and she'd eat it perfectly fine.

"You hungry Luc?" Grabbing wet food you make sure she eats before heading back out and getting the box with your most precious items, your hammer and some nails.

You carry it all back up to your room and set it down on the little bench at the end of the bed. Looking at all the free wall space imagining which one would be best suited. The last wall on top of the dresser seemed perfect for your collection, you smile as you open up the box, carefully grabbing out the fragile skulls, the picture frames that held pinned bugs, two bats and the smaller bones that were inside a see through glass box. Luci liked to steal them, you'd never see them again.

Putting up all the picture frames and skulls, you were happy with it. Only small parts of the wall were still free which should keep you in check, but you couldn't wait to add more to your collection.

You loved to pin dead butterflies, moths and some spiders. You got some while on long walks, some you raised yourself. They were very important to you. The fact you could let them be in their full glory and beauty even in death was something you loved.

After finishing the wall, and the sun slowly set you decided you needed to find some damn candles. And lucky as you were, there was an entire cabinet full of them, one of the drawers was full of matches.

"Mh so busted light bulbs ain't new here huh?"

You leave the study with a huge box filled with candles and set them up. Putting a few on the tables and shelves that were safe enough to hold candles, and some in the hallway and up the stairs on those mirrored candle holders. Which were pretty rad to you. Watching as Luci scratched at a wall and smelled it, "what's up girl? Don't tell me we got rats or something in the walls?!" You gasp as you walk over to her, pressing your ear to the wall. Nothing, but a faint buzzing of the electricity...well the electricity didn't work but sure did?

"This should do.." finally done with most work you decided to eat dinner. Of course the kitchen didn't really help with that so a sandwich had to do.

Seated in the study room with Luci leaving from the small couch as soon as you arrived to go upstairs with her attitude and ready to use the bathroom.

You decided to just eat, you eyes flickering over the walls and shelves filled with books. Beautiful hard leather bound ones, some definitely seemed to have potential for a lot of money if sold well.

After picking up the one that sat on the small table next to the couch and looking through it you dropped it as you flinched. A loud crash could be heard from upstairs, Luci never broke things. Yes she was a drama queen but she never did.

When she came running down the stairs hurriedly hiding behind the couch you were seated on staring towards the stairs with growling and hissing. You get up carefully, "what's wrong baby?" you ask a bit shaken by now.

She never acted like this not for no reason at least.

Grabbing the pointy letter opener you slowly make you way to the stairs. Great, the too of them was dark, the entire hall was, hell the entire first floor was a creepy pit.

"Oh...mh okay..it's okay you're the only person in this house." Trying to sooth yourself with self talk didn't help as much as you'd hoped only the zippo in your pocket would grant you light up in that black hole.

Walking up the creaky stairs with your 'dagger' pointed and ready to be used, and you zippo lighting the steps extra with the candles that lined the wall. Swallowing hard you call in like a fool, "hello?". Like girl, be for real. You're a horror obsessed freak and don't follow the rules? Wow..

Down the hall you only see the light of your lighter, and your slight reflection in the window, "shit...I'm gonna die and become cat food aren't I?", you huff out before you start walking.

"I'M ARMED AND I'M SCARED TO USE IT!", you yell out. Again, like an idiot. You walk past all the rooms to yours and nothing. Not a person, not a broken piece of whatever broke, nothing...or...wait..

"That's not mine...." you say staring at the stuffed owl and crow that now sat on your dresser, decorating the room just as nicely as your wall.

"Okay ahahah what?!" Feeling a buzz off fright thunder through you when you hear a loud thud in the hallway. Just around the corner of your doorway.

"Mhh great.....hello?? Ghost??" you ask into the silence nothing, so the only valid thing to do was jump into the hallway with a war scream (squeal) Just to find a porcelain doll sitting up against the wall next to you.

"Who are you you little freak?" you knew who this doll was. Brahms Heelshires replacement, you knew reading up about this suspiciously cheap mansion was a good idea. You expected this place had held many deaths but well...this one the last generations of Heelshires passing was probably the saddest of them all.

The poor boy who passed away, so horribly, burned, and the parents who ended up going with a different element, drowning. You huff as you brush your hair out of your eyes (yes you got hair or a wig idc).

Crouching down next to the doll, "hi..um I hope you don't mind my intrusion, but well I own this house now..so maybe we should co-exists..or I'd have to sage your ass...which I don't wanna do you're a kid after all" you say, mostly talking to yourself like a dork.

"I don't know how you managed to bring me those stuffed animals, but uhm..thanks? They're nice? I suppose...or um a warning I suppose.."

Basically jumping out of your shoes when all the lights on the floor suddenly turned on and probably the ones downstairs as well.

"SHIT!.. gosh....pff um..Thank you?"

The rest of the night was rather pleasant, a few thuds here and there and a few of Luci's hissing at the wall and sleep seemed so easy to get.

Little did you know. This house came with more secrets than ghost's and haunted objects.

[heartevent]

PROPAGANDA

Custard: My mom wants me to call him custard because it makes my little sister happy, even though ☝️ my sister was the one who made the joke that hes a cigarette butt on the ground initially

Mandarin: My bestie's grandma that I'm a caregiver for suggested this. It would match with my other two cats because all of them have a name that means something in a different language. Atsu means twin (my mom told me when we got him 11 years ago that its Egyptian, but when I looked it up I saw it was also used in Ghana. Unsure of its specific origin) and Bisou means kiss in French. Mandarin being orange in spanish would fit rly well.

Clementine/Tangerine: One of my all time favorite movies is Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and I think it would be so fun to call him Tangerine like how joel does in the movie 😆 Tbh thats the only reason

Cigarette AKA "Ciggy": He's orange and white, and (this is just me speculating I'm not an expert) he has a fever coat which makes the tips of his fur grey and he has grey splotches on certain places, namely on the base of his tail. He is a feral in our neighborhood and he hangs out on the ground like a cigarette butt lol. We call him ciggy stardust too because my mom loves David Bowie and we think its cute. Sometimes I call him ciggy wiggy too.

Pls give me what u think 🙏🙏 I don't want to call him custard I never get to name the cats

[filmbyjy]

Currently procrastinating doing my homework cuz I’m stupid and it’s so overwhelming it’s actually ridiculous and it got me thinking… What enhypen members do you think would help distract you vs which ones would force you to do your work lol (I have some ideas but I wanna hear your opinion) and how would they distract/motivate you? Not me thinking about neck kisses with Jay

-🥥

aww :(( you aren’t dumb. its understandable that you get overwhelmed with homework sometimes (I get overwhelmed too considering my homework consists of drawing and making 3D models)

but anyways, if I were to put them in categories…

distracts you (sfw): sunoo & ni-ki + sunghoon & maybe jay if he needs your attention

sunoo and ni-ki would definitely force you away from your work. like they are more important than homework☝️ screw homework🗣️ you can forget about completing it. if you get detention because of them then they will apologise and give you hugs. still dont expect them to help you. they will also do it constantly. you’re going to have to resist them unfortunately😔

simple, sunghoon hates homework. as for jay, if baby is feeling needy for your attention then he will hug you and pull you away from it – soft jay :((

how they distract you: by literally jumping on you and whining for your attention like a cat or dog / pokes your cheeks constantly until you give into them (which happens often) / hugs you tight

makes you do it (sfw): jungwon + jake, heeseung & most of the times jay

come on now. do you really think leader nim or jay will let you neglect your homework🤨 he will literally sit you down and force you to finish it☝️ but of course, he will give you a treat after completing it. CUDDLES☺️

jake and heeseung dont really force upon you to do your homework. rather they encourage you and maybe help you with it a little if you dont understand it

how they motivate you: by making a deal “if you do this/finish this, we can cuddle or do something together.” / they will give treats in the middle like snacks / making promises / kisses to motivate (yes I imagined jay doing this)

nsfw – hyung line only⬇️ MDNI‼️

distracts you (nsfw): heeseung & sunghoon (actually on occasions jay and jake if they cant keep it their pants + i’m also a whore for them💗)

LORD THESE TWO HAVE NO PATIENCE I TELL YOU. especially sunghoon☝️ that man hates homework and school with a passion. like imagine doing homework and sunghoon peeps over your shoulder. literally scoffs and pushes you down on the bed whilst shoving his tongue down your throat. ah yes, what an amazing boyfriend😍

heeseung has slightly more patience than hoon but like he still doesn’t care and will just pull you away from the homework. probably doesn’t literally shove his tongue but he will tilt your face so you will face him and he kisses you passionately😀

for jay and jake, they usually do not distract you from doing your homework but like if they do, it’s usually them being horn dogs and need help. I know everyone says jake cant keep it in his pants but like when it comes to homework, he prioritises it more before giving himself an reward. unless of course, he can’t wait. much like jay

how they distract you in nasty way😀: by grinding up against you / I’d like to say sunghoon will literally grab your hand and place it on his dick before saying along the lines of “im hard. I need you.” / for jay’s case, i’d say pressing kisses from your ear to your jaw, neck and shoulders. gives you goosebumps. so good luck not getting distracted.

makes you do it (nsfw): jay & jake

okay jay, like I said before in the sfw version. jay prioritises homework > anything else. he thinks you should complete it and be done with it so you don’t have to anything to worry about later on. however, you would be the one distracted since HE IS LOOKING SO DAMN FINE SITTING DOWN ON THE COUCH WHILE MANSPREADING😩

also mentioned before I said jake would prioritise homework. its like jay. he knows its important so its great to do the important task first before worrying about the high sex drive he has. he doesn’t distract you and encourages you to do it despite his dick twitching everytime his eyes travel down your body (mf is a horny teen I swear)

how they reward you: after doing your homework, they give you what you deserve with tons of praises. “good girl/you did so well.” lord🫠 / makes love to you to show you, you are amazing and they love you🥺

so yeah, that’s my take on this :D

[retelling-of-ragnarok]

🌟

MORE MEMORIES

🌟 -> wildcard

❆ decided to go with the conversation Cieran and Gwen had while changing Gwen’s appearance ☝️ :) ❆

↳ ❝ “Yo. If ya mess up, I’ll kill ya. Ya know that, right?”

A rough, southern voice spoke through slight sleepiness. Unlike their usual, eloquent, speech— Gwen felt that it wasn’t necessary. Not here, not with him. Plus, they got to have a break from the Japanese they were struggling to learn. Sure, it’s only been three days— but it was still frustrating!

“Yeah? What’s the worst a shorty can do? Can ya even reach me?” An equally rough, older, voice replied to them, as they felt a comb yank down in their curls. Making the younger wince, and have to regain their balance. Tilting their head back, they scowled up at him, though it lacked any of the maliciousness normally associated with such an expression. They looked more like an angry cat, than anything.

“Don’t give me that look. It ain’t my fault ya have knots. Take care of your hair more next time.”

“I don’t have knots, ya insolent prick. Though it isn’t like demons have optimal hair care, ya know.” It was the truth. The newly 18 year old couldn’t take care of their hair the way they wanted. The most they could do is make sure it wouldn’t tangle and knot, not nearly as much care as it needed.

“Speaking ‘o demons. What about that old man ya were working with. Matter ‘o fact— What about yer old colleagues?”

What about them? That was certainly a great question. Gwen didn’t really care what became of their old coworkers, after their sudden disappearance. After all Karl likely made it seem as if they simply disappeared. Reduced to nothing but an urban legend. Though they still needed to work with Richter; and was given even more letters and documents to compensate.

Gwen was sitting on the floor, knees bent a bit, as their arms rested on their knees. Cieran sat on their bed, legs on either side of them as he prepared their hair for dyeing. For someone so brash, he was surprising good at hair care— Likely due to grooming animals, but the teen would rather not make that comparison.

“The Old Man? Ya mean Richter? I’m still worked like a dog, I just don’t get credit anymore. I can’t even begin to comprehend how Rio puts up with him.”

Their brother let out a scowl, as he finished detangling their hair. A considerable amount of it had been cut off. Beforehand, the length could rival even Karlheinz’s. Long, elegant, and flowing. It was even enchanting to some, with its pure white colour. Now reduced to onto a third of its length— With the top and underside of their hair being two completely different lengths. It was surely an odd hairstyle, but it isn’t like they cared too much. As long as they were unrecognisable.

Gwen instead chuckled at Cieran’s disdain, as he had heard Richter’s name, a mischievous smile forming on their face. Truly, only one encounter had left him so grumpy. How silly.

“Ya ready to dye it? Ya sure you wanna be disguising yerself like this? If ya get tired of it yer gonna have to cut even more off so it’ll grow normally again.”

“Why wouldn’t I be sure? I’ve made more difficult decisions.”

“Ya but what if ya show up to that old fart’s house again and he doesn’t recognise ya? Won’t he attack ya or something?”

“Aw~ Why are ya worried about something like that? Do ya want me to say hello to your old friend for you~?”

With another rough tug, Cieran aggressively began to apply the colour to the underside of Gwen’s hair. A focused, but very obviously pouty, expression on his face. Not even bothering to look Gwen in the eye, as he frowned.

“What, still hung up on your failed break and enter scheme? I think ya should be honoured~ He has familiars put in place just for you. You’re like a star~”

“Shut the hell up.”

“D’aw, I’ll pass the message on to him. Anything else ya want me to say big brother~? Want me to tell him about the tantrum you threw after he tossed you out?”

“I hate you.”

“You do not.”

“Do too.”

They bickered on like that, for a minute or so, before finally breaking into laughter. What was once a gloomy two to three days, quickly became more comfortable. Perhaps this fresh start wasn’t so bad. ❞