#I think that I will only be able to submit sketches this year | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

snowsonlylove · 10 months ago

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hii!! i commented about making a fic of coryo w or about the song haunted by beyonce, i was thinking maybe something smut if ur comfortable! if not its okay but the fic could be academy!coriolanus x academy!reader and theyre school rivals both working hard to beat each other and theyre obsessed with each other but they hide it with the fact they wanna win but they j wanna fuck (or get together) maybe theyre both possessive and jealous or coryo is the one thats really extra with it,, the story could go rlly slow too and then theres just a part where the facade and tension goes away and theyre needing each other so badly at that moment rushing everything, just like how the song goes idk if i made any sense :o im so excited to see the result!! this song just gives me coriolanus vibes

You Must Be Haunting Me..

a/n note: hii!! yes, i loved your idea and i mostly stayed with your vision, only changing some minor things so the situation makes sense and dw i managed to deliver 🫡 hopefully you like it!! tysm for your idea and i look forward to seeing if there are some things you want to expand on (maybe with little blurbs on this dynamic bc i absolutely LOVE this trope!) & i'm totally comfortable with smut so dw about sending me kinky asks or requests. i totally accept them!!

Pairing: Academy!Coriolanus Snow x AcademyRival!Reader

Summary: Y/N Y/L/N and Coriolanus Snow have been academic rivals ever since the beginning of their journey in the Academy. It’s no secret that both Y/N and Coriolanus are the two top students of the Academy, both of them only being able to beat each other, the rest are just no competition for them. However, they genuinely have no idea why they're doing this constant battle against each other. Little did they know, both of them always think about each other behind closed doors and are obsessed with each other, each equally impressed at the other at how intelligent they are. One day, things just boil over with how Coriolanus constantly riles Y/N up and they explode in a huge fight which results in a turmoil of deep, rough and passionate sex.

Fic Type: Smut (NSFW) 18+, Enemies to Lovers trope, dramatic behaviour from both of them, a wee bit of angst (mostly derived from the name-calling but in my head this is more funny than it is angsty 😭😭😭)

Warnings: unprotected sex (don’t do this guys, use a condom. reader is on birth control), rough pushing, harsh words used from both Y/N and Coriolanus, degradation (use of whore), cunnilingus (female receiving), squirting, lmk if i missed anything else

Word Count: 2k

I do not own Coriolanus Snow or Y/N Y/L/N (cuz it’s you, boo). All credits go to Suzanne Collins and her team. Song credits also go to Beyonce and her team.

I do not allow my works to be republished or translated under any circumstances. Any instances of this happening and YOU WILL BE BLOCKEDDD.

Also, ageless and empty blogs will be BLOCKED as this is a 18+ fic. Report my fics and you’re blocked cuz if u don’t like it, LEAVEEEE.

Y/N Y/L/N and Coriolanus Snow began this disastrous journey from the age of 11-12. Both students entered the Academy with an air of poise and elitism about them as they knew what it took to defeat the competition in the Academy, most students not even being a possible candidate to them. It was all fine and well, until one year, Y/N and Coriolanus were put in the same class for the year, and the rivalry then started..

The first assignment of that year was an individual project on what each student thought the Capitol looked like during its earliest times. Each student was tasked with coming up with a drawing with their thoughts on said topic. This was their chance to go up against each other. Both Y/N and Coriolanus would stay up in the library after school and collect piles of books and do their research and by the time the task was due, Y/N and Coriolanus obviously submitted the best sketches.

After acknowledging this, the professor asked the class to vote for who’s sketch was the best. Small pieces of paper were given out to write either Y/N’s and Coriolanus’s names and as the professor then collected the papers, making both students anxious. As the professor counted the votes, Y/N’s heart was beating out of her chest, Coriolanus’s as well. It was then announced that Y/N won, which made Coriolanus furious as he spewed a full speech on how much he hated her. “You’d never be as good as what they say you are. You’re just dirt under my feet. God! You’re such a bitch!” He screamed as the professor and the class started at him in astonishment as they’ve never seen him lash out before.

Y/N was heartbroken when she heard this as sometimes when Coriolanus wasn’t looking, Y/N would sneak glances towards him and she started to be enamoured by him. Their time together after hours in the library would usually end up in them having conversations about their day and this time together helped them bond better. With this in mind, Y/N truly thought Coriolanus was at least civil enough to be respectful towards her. Y/N felt tears well up in her eyes as she ran out of the classroom, the professor telling her to wait.

Coriolanus, still blind with rage, kept on screaming and yelling obscenities about Y/N as he stormed off to his seat, his face red and his whole demeanour fueling with rage. Unfortunately, this fateful day was what started the vicious rivalry between Y/N and Coriolanus as the two would fight over who got the better grades, which teacher favoured which student more, the differences in their scores in each assignment every single day.

As of current, both Y/N and Coriolanus are 18 and in the midst of graduating. One of their last assignments was unfortunately a pair assignment. Dr Gaul once scoped out the Academy and witnessed one of the fights between Y/N and Coriolanus and she noticed how by getting them near each other, she could make them into the power couple of Panem and have them continue the Hunger Games, which inspired her to whisper in the ear of Dean Highbottom to get them to be in the same class and for them to share a table together until they graduated. Both Y/N and Coriolanus were very unhappy about this, both choosing to ignore each other while they were in their seats.

With both of them getting older, both Y/N and Coriolanus started noticing certain things about them. Coriolanus noticed how Y/N’s facial features were more prominent, how her ass got bigger, her breasts more plump, making him unable to control a certain urge at times which led him to mastrubate thinking about her sometimes. Y/N also noticed a few things about Coriolanus. How he started to grow muscles, how they cling to his academy uniform whenever he took off his academy jacket, how his jaw was sharper, how his nose was becoming more emphasised, how he lost his baby fat. She can honestly go forever and forever about how attractive he is.

That being said, there was one particular day where everything just blew over the water. Y/N and Coriolanus were taking notes during Dean Highbottom’s lecture when Y/N felt Coriolanus’s elbow dig into her arms whenever they got to writing. This obviously made Y/N frustrated as she harshly whispered to Coriolanus to stop a few times, which led to a hushed debate between the two before it grew louder and louder until they were screaming at each other, making the whole class look at them and Dean Highbottom staring at them in shock before yelling for them to stop and stay after class for detention.

Both Y/N and Coriolanus felt embarrassed as they were lectured by Dean Highbottom after class before an assistant of Dean Highbottom requested him to join Dr Gaul for a meeting about the Hunger Games. Dean Highbottom sighed as he looked at the two young teenagers, “Look.. I feel that you two are now old enough to know what is acceptable behaviour in class. I’ll be back soon, do not kill each other while I’m gone.” As Highbottom left the classroom, the tense atmosphere began to build as the door closed behind him.

Almost immediately after he left, Y/N and Coriolanus stared at each other with the most hateful expression ever. Y/N menacingly glared at him while saying with gritted teeth, “See, Coriolanus! If you’re long ass elbow didn’t fucking dig in my arm every single time, that old fart wouldn’t lecture us for one fucking hour! My god, you’re truly dumb!” Coriolanus glared at her before stating, “It’s not my fucking fault that happened with you were taking over the whole goddamn table with your arms everywhere! Geez, Y/N! I thought you’d be more modest!”

Y/N looked at him, shocked, “ME?!! You’re blaming ME for something YOU did! That is so fucking misogynistic coming from you, a man! I swear to god, this is discrimination towards women at its core! Grow the fuck up, Coriolanus! We’re not children anymore! God! I’d be spending my time with Sejanus right now if it weren’t for your stubborn ass!” Y/N huffed while rolling her eyes. Coriolanus stared at her, his face full of jealousy before gritting out, “Sejanus? What the fuck are you doing with Sejanus?! You’re such a fucking whore! Ugh, you’re such a bitch!” Y/N looked at him, offended, “Bitch, weren’t you just fucking Clemensia a few weeks ago? Yeah, I heard about that! Everyone was practically talking about it! Don’t pretend to be so innocent, Coriolanus!”

Coriolanus looked at her, his expression turned dark as he stalked towards her, her taking a step back until her back had hit the wall. Coriolanus leaned towards her, lifting one of his arms to go above her, bringing the other hand towards her chin and lifting it. At this point, the height difference became very apparent as her head was tipped far back, her still glaring at him. “Are you baiting me, Y/N? You talk so much for someone who just fucked Felix Ravinstill of all people a few days ago..” Y/N continued to glare up at him, “At least I had the decency to keep it in my pants longer than you! God, I hate you!” Coriolanus looked taken aback as he muttered while leaning in to cup her cheeks, her face wiggling to be let out of his grip, “Well, I hate you too, sweetheart…”

Coriolanus leaned in as he captured Y/N’s lips with his, their mouths fighting for dominance as they kissed each other as if they needed each other to breathe. The previous tension broke into a more sensual type of tension as Coriolanus wrapped his hands around her hair ravenously while Y/N’s hand made friends with the back of his neck. One of Coriolanus’s hands found its way to Y/N’s waist as he dragged her away from the wall, pushing her towards a nearby desk before propping her up on the desk and spreading her legs, allowing him to be closer to her, not once breaking their kiss. Y/N broke their kiss as she moved her lips to Coriolanus’s neck and trailed them down his Adam’s apple while taking off his blazer and unbuttoning his shirt, Coriolanus doing the same to her.

As they undressed each other, they continued to slide their tongues against each other, the sound echoing around the classroom. They managed to undress each other down to them both only wearing underwear before Coriolanus kneeled down so that he was face to face with the apex of her thighs. Coriolanus leaned in and captured his teeth to her underwear as he slowly pulled it down, revealing her aching, dripping pussy. Coriolanus licked his lips as he roughly shoved two fingers in her cavern as he curled his fingers in and out her folds, creating a beautiful sensation as he found her G-spot with no difficulty.

Y/N moaned as she threw her head back and slid her hands down to Coriolanus’s hair and tugged on it while pulling him closer to her heat. “Oh my gosh.. Coryo, it feels so good…” As he kept pumping his fingers in and out of her, he suddenly attached his lips onto her clit as he sucked on her clit and pumped his fingers harder, each movement feeling more and more intense for Y/N. He kept on going as he curled his fingers one final time, which made Y/N yell out as she squirted and covered his fingers with her wetness.

Y/N sighed in satisfaction as she helped Coriolanus up and gave him a deep, passionate kiss while tugging down his underwear and hooking her legs on the bottom of his back, Coriolanus leaned in closer as he aligned his erection with her heat, tapping his dick on her clit a few times before pushing his hardness in her heat. He only pushed in half of it when Y/N suddenly exclaimed, “Coryo, it’s too much! I can’t take all of it!”

Coriolanus leaned down so his forehead was laying against hers before whispering in a comforting tone, “It will fit, Y/N. Trust me, trust me..” He closed his eyes as he leaned in to capture her lips with his as he pushed in slower this time, now being able to fill her pussy with his cock to the point where their hips were against each other. Coriolanus groaned as he slowly pulled out before thrusting in again, “Fuck, Y/N… You’re so good. Such a good girl..”

Y/N moaned at hearing him praise her as he started to thrust his dick in faster, each time harder and rougher than the last. The room started to echo with the sound of her moaning, his groaning and the sound of skin slapping. Y/N closed her eyes as she moaned, her mouth forming an “O” shape as she threw her head back once more and arched her back, needing to feel closer to him. Coriolanus wrapped his arms around her waist as he pulled her in closer and kissed his way all around her neck, leaving furious red hickeys which would soon turn purple.

The pace in which he was fucking her got rougher each time he would thrust his aching hard dick into her dripping pussy, the slapping sound really turning them on and his balls slapped to her ass, their moans becoming louder and louder each time. The furious force in which he was fucking her started to reach a boiling point as Coriolanus moaned, “Ugh.. I’m fucking cumming, Y/N. Oh.. You’re such a good girl. Such a tight and wet pussy..”

“Ohh.. Coriolanus… So good, so deep… I’m gonna come, gonna come.. OH MY GODD!!” Y/N screamed as she came. Coriolanus groaned as he came inside her, sighing as he tried to bask in the afterglow of his orgasm, holding Y/N tight against his chest in the process. Y/N left kisses and hickeys around his neck as she looked up at him with a dazed but satisfied expression and kissed his lips however, this time the kiss shared between them wasn’t one full of hate, it was one full of love.

As they pulled away from each other and started to get dressed, Coriolanus faced Y/N and said, “You know, if you wanted to fuck me, you could’ve said so.” He said with a smirk. Y/N turned to look at him, acting shocked as she huffed in feign frustration, “Oh shut up, Coriolanus!” She smacked his chest as both of them gave each other a silly grin before hurling in laughter.

#academy!coriolanus snow #coriolanus snow #tbosas fanfiction #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #hunger games #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus snow x reader #snow x reader #coriolanus snow smut #coriolanus snow angst

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plgiftexchange · 2 months ago

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Questions from Interest Check

Hello all! Thanks for all of your interest, and thank you for filling out the Interest Check! We still have quite a bit left until the Interest Check closes, but I figured I would answer a few Interest Check/Ask Box questions now, and answer the rest closer to the end of the Interest Check:

Is traditional art accepted in this exchange? Do art gifts require a specific resolution/file quality/etc?

Yes, traditional art is accepted! Traditional art must be shared via a high-quality scan and/or photograph. We do not have any specific resolution requirements, but as long as it meets the standards of art submissions (Minimum: Colored Sketch Maximum: Colored Full Piece (w/ background)) then it should be fine. During the event, we will have two check-ins, and if anyone has any questions about image quality, etc, you can absolutely reach out to me with any pictures they may have of your work!

Would AUs be allowed? if so, how would it work when submitting the form? For example, If I had an AU I wanted artwork of, would I have to explain what the basis of it was & offer artwork references of the designs if there were any? I would expect including AUs would really complicate things & it wouldn't be allowed for that reason, but I felt it was worth asking anyways

Personally, I think having AUs might be an interesting way to do this years gift exchange. Last year we had a lot of OCs set in the Layton universe, and I think it might be an interesting way to change it up with allowing AUs (We didn't necessarily NOT allow AUs last year, it just didn't come up.) This year, we will have several prompt lines that people can post one prompt each in, and a requirement will be all submissions have to have at least one base canon Layton prompt (which can include ships), just because that will make it infinitely easier to pair people up. If someone were to submit an AU, it would require some sort of pdf or drive file that anyone can access where people can see the jist of the AU with any relevant images. It will also require a short blurb about the AU (that is easy to read- please don't send an essay) with what it's about, and then (if the prompter would like) prompts alongside that. Again, I'm quickly mentioning that the prompter will be required to have an non-AU prompt, just given that it will be hard to pair people up with people who do/ do not want to draw Professor Layton AUs, but I do think its an interesting idea! People who submit AUs will not have a guarantee that their AU will be drawn, but it will certainly be an option that the person who is drawing the gift can take if they want.

If I chose "Crossover Pieces" in 4th question, will I have an opportunity to draw someone's PL OCs too (For example PLvsPW and PL OC/s in it)?

Probably? It really depends where the interest check lands, but right now it's a 50/50 about whether people would like to do just base canon Layton art or include Layton OCs. As mentioned above, I personally think it would be really interesting to do a gift exchange that allows AUs and OCs; however, it will be infinitely more difficult to organize. It really depends on how many people are planning on joining the gift exchange!

No, but we will require at least 2 social medias (which CAN include email) to take part! This is in case we need to contact you via other means. The social medias that will be included will include Twitter, Tumblr, Discord, and Email. The reason for the limit with social media is just to make it a lot manageable for us to pair people together, especially given that we are hosting this on Twitter/Tumblr mainly, and people usually enjoy being able to actually give their gift to their own Secret Buddy (which would require people only on tumblr to be paired with people either only on tumblr or both on tumblr/twitter, etc).

Lastly, I'm going to preface that we will try our hardest with pairing everyone up with the best person possible! Doing so is, of course, a bit difficult given that we primarily will not be pairing spoiler characters/games with people who have not played that game, but we will try our best. We're very excited to see what people create- we had a blast last year with hosting this on Twitter, and we're very excited to host it again!

---

Some smaller updates: We now have a little blurb talking about what a gift exchange/secret santa is on the website! Feel free to check that out if you would like to know what this event is.

We've also set up the Gift Exchange 2024 role on our PLGiftExchange Discord Channel! Please join us here!

Any new questions submitted will be added in a reblog from this post within the next couple days!

~~~

#plgiftexchange #professor layton

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teecupangel · 2 years ago

Photo

Submitted by @saberamane

Saw this artwork by astarcis and my mind immediately went ‘what would the ancestors do if they found this, and it was actually Desmond reincarnated after the eye?’ Like the various animal Desmond’s people have submitted.

Altair would probably find it fascinating, and Maria would not want it around the kids at all, it’s at least partly snake, what if it bit the children? Jokes on Maria though, the children love this strange abomination, and Desmond in kind loves kids. And with his knowledge, he’d be able to stay behind and protect Malik and Sef when the others leave to kill Genghis Khan. Give Abbas an agonizing death with his venom or something.

I feel Ezio would probably find him somewhere and take him to Leonardo. He’d maybe say something stupid to Leo like 'what kind of dog is this? I’ve never seen such a thing before.’ And Leo, bless his soul, would be like 'you can’t be that stupid Ezio. Thats not a dog. I don’t know what that is. Where did you find it?’ 'I’m going to keep him. He’s kinda cute.’ Desmond is very sweet to Maria and Claudia, which just cements Ezio’s thoughts that he is some kind of weird dog. It wags it’s tail and everything like a dog. Even if it does swallow it’s food whole…

Ratonhnhaké:ton and his tribe probably think of him as a forest spirit or something. They’d definitely know he wasn’t 'natural’ and therefore would try to honor him so as to not bring misfortune on the tribe by being disrespectful. Desmond would hang around the temple a lot, trying to find a way to destroy Juno, or at least make it so she can’t communicate with Ratonhnhaké:ton. And Charles Lee would definitely die horribly by his poison bite before he could kill the tribe. Once Ratonhnhaké:ton was older, Desmond would probably start following him around more, leaving the temple more often. Helping with hunts and such. Of course, the tribe would then think Ratonhnhaké:ton was the 'chosen one’ or something by the spirit and would start to ask him what Desmond wanted for tribute or something lol.

(The creature is called a 'nightstalker’ from fallout new vegas, i’ve never played that series myself, but it seems to have a lot of interesting creatures from the nuclear fallout that occurred.)

Any additional thoughts or head-cannon’s?

==============

(Additions from teecup)

Well, first and foremost... don’t look at the actual nightstalker from Fallout New Vegas. They don’t... look as cute as the one above. XD

Also, here’s the tumblr post of that artwork

As for additional headcanons and thoughts:

I like to think that Desmond is one of those nightstalkers that can turn invisible and the first time he does it, everybody panicked because they thought he flatout disappeared.

Sef definitely loves Desmond the most as he grew up with Desmond being both his guard dog and babysitter. Sef’s daughters also love Desmond and likes to hug him. Unlike Maria who had been worried, Sef absolutely encourages his daughters to play with Desmond.

Malik’s son, Tazim, was once dared to tug Desmond’s tail. Just to be a jerk, Desmond howled loudly and pretended to die for dramatic effect. It traumatized Tazim so badly because he honestly believed he killed Desmond. Desmond felt super bad especially since no one could stop Tazim from crying even after Desmond showed that he’s alive and well.

Desmond didn’t think it would be a big deal since Darim’s preferred method of stopping him from doing something stupid was to tug his tail anyway.

Leonardo would definitely draw sketches of Desmond which would baffle historians in later years. Leonardo is also the only person to wonder how Desmond reproduces (Nightstalkers lay eggs… and… uuuhhh… every nightstalker has a chance to drop eggs if you kill them so… I’m not saying Desmond can lay eggs… I’m just saying… the possibility exists?)

Desmond mostly communicates with growls and whimpers but whenever it’s time to poison someone, he hisses and rattles.

The preferred poison of the Assassins was based on his venom thanks to Altaïr’s studies. This means that old Assassin families are immune to his venom. This includes Haytham.

Desmond definitely destroyed the crystal skull that Juno uses to communicate with Ratonhnhaké:ton’s tribe by playing with it like it’s a ball of yarn. The villagers just assumed it was the will of the spirits.

Whenever anyone asks Ratonhnhaké:ton what Desmond wants for tribute, Ratonhnhaké:ton always answers that the best tribute is a kill by their hunters that will be shared with the tribes as some kind of festivity. It took months for Desmond to be able to explain it to Ratonhnhaké:ton using charades and Desmond was actually just saying ‘a meal together’.

George Washington cannot get near Ratonhnhaké:ton because Desmond hisses and rattle any time he tries... Haytham also gets the hissing and rattling treatment.

#submission #assassin's creed #desmond miles #desmond as a nightstalker #should this count as a crossover?#naaaahhh #altaïr ibn la’ahad #ezio auditore #ratonhnhaké:ton #connor kenway #darim ibn la'ahad #sef ibn la'ahad #tazim al sayf #leonardo da vinci #maria auditore #claudia auditore #haytham kenway #george washington

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eiochevart · 3 months ago

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is it hard getting into The Animation Workshop? did you need references? (also, if you choose a bachelor program, do you get to go into internships?) sorry for all these questions! just really curious🫣

Also correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought you studied animation but then switched to something else? I might be wrong though...

Thanks for asking!

The Animation Workshop is an amazing school in Denmark with a somewhat lengthy admissions process. First, they all applicants must submit a portfolio, and if you are selected to the next stage, you will be invited to an interview and a ~3 hour practical test where you have to draw a storyboard and various sketches based on the prompts they give you.

Most of the people I know, and myself included, say that the application period was very inspiring and fun, but also daunting and a bit tiring. Recently the school has been gaining more and more applicants, which means more competition, so I’d say that it might be somewhat hard to get in. My main tip is to give yourself time to look over your work and analyze it, always trying to find ways to improve (without being too harsh on yourself). Definitely use references!! This applies to both the anatomical figure drawing part of the portfolio, and the imagination drawing part. References don’t only help you get a better understanding of the subject that you’re drawing, but looking at how different artists have handled drawing the same thing can be very inspiring and helpful.

I definitely encourage everyone who is interested in applying to try, regardless of whether or not you think you’re good enough. I for one feel like I learned SO much just making the portfolio itself. If you’d, like I’d love to give more in-depth tips for the portfolio!

As for internships, yes, it is part of the program! In the final semester, all students are scheduled to apply for internships at various studios, and as far as I know it’s portfolio based. I’m sure someone else knows way more about this than I do.

As for the last question, I used to study sociology but switched to Character Animation at TAW 😅 A few years ago I took an animation course at community college, it wasn’t a bachelor but more like a preparatory year! (Not at all mandatory to get into the bachelor)

I hope I was able to clear some things up! Feel free to DM me if you have any more questions, I’d love to give advice :D Once again I encourage everyone who is interested, to give it a try (and this is not just because I want more Zelda fans here :O)

#asks #the animation workshop #animation school #art school #advice #?#not an art post

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thehipovercor · 5 months ago

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Here, have some of my cringe writing

Ft. the magic of me assuming the brainwaves of whichever character I'm focusing on.

Summary: "Stupid Metaphors, or Whatever" Renard/Carpal and Marty, whom do Not have lungs, go to a human park and think about breathing

No content warnings, only my secondhand embarrassment :')

Renard had probably painted that same oak tree forty times, and would paint it another forty if given the chance. As long as the public park remained a public park in the decades coming, and perhaps not something sad like a parking lot or golf course, he would certainly have his chances. This sketch would be another in the series tracking the growth since his sharp eyes spied a sapling growing just enough more than its peers for it to be a hopeful candidate for maturity. Indeed it had grown, and he had snapshots in time which no one else would’ve noticed otherwise. One year the bark was strong and healthy, the next someone… Well perhaps a young couple thought their love was worthy of carving into the wood in a small bare spot where the bark had been ripped away. It was possible their romance lasted, or… Regardless, the carving lasted and it was painted too.

He remembered to blink when a breeze blew by – refreshing! – and his eyes felt slightly dry. He narrowly avoided sticking a paintbrush into his hair, which wouldn’t be the first accident of its kind. Brought back into the world, he gave the oak tree another once over before stretching his arms and seeing what had happened in the time he missed. The day had gotten hotter and more people had congregated to places of shade, with the truly rugged individuals continuing to jog or – what was that sport? – play basketball on the court with faded turf. Someone should touch that up some time. Renard checked around a little more before finding his dear travel partner engaged in a classic game of football; the correct version of football, of course. Everyone was a blur, bustling, sprinting, then…! He wasn’t quite sure of the original terms and conditions, but he could hear the simultaneous cheers and groans as the ball hit the makeshift goal. He mixed a little more yellow into his green before looking back over. There he was, a head and shoulders above the rest but no better than the one who had scored. A chatter of voices discussing the match – probably – before a chorus of laughter. Renard smiled seemingly on instinct, backed up by the slight eye contact and wave he received. He waved back to the group. No, a little blue should’ve been in the green. He was back on step one.

“That’s freaky, guy! Did you even hear yourself?” “‘Huff huff huff’ like a dog or something! He sounded just like a dog. Crazy, you’d make my lab go nuts.” “Well, I, eh… It’s a condition. The…” “Asthma or something, yeah?” “A little rarer, but not– does not hurt!” “Doesn’t make you a cleaner kick either!” More laughter. That’s just rude. Renard double checked and saw the slightest glimmer of an idea. But it seems you’ve got this one.

“You see, eh… I could probably growl too. Your dog? The ‘lab,’ it would hate the growl.”

“Yeah?” and other such jests and jabs rang out. Lighthearted, hopefully, from the comradery of the game. “I can bark too, watch.” One of the more comedic members submitted their best impression of a dog, calling more laughter. “No wonder you love playing ball.” “No no, you need to watch how it is done.”

Renard made another bout of eye contact and nodded over, waiting on whatever his partner would do. Scare them proper! He watched, so clearly across the distance, as he took a deep breath, and…

Indeed, no one expected the primal rumble, deep and powerful, that slipped into a chuff, then into a small laugh. Surely all of them would’ve been able to feel the reverberation in their legs, climbing to their chests, shaking their cores. The players exclaimed, with the comedian unable to mimic even a minute fraction of the intensity. Some passersby looked up, confused, possibly trying to think of what local animals could come close to the noise they had just heard. A jogger took a wider path around.

“Damn, okay. What’s your condition called? ‘I’m half crocodile’-itis?”

“Ehh well… We do not talk about it. It’s not, eh, contagious, though.” “I’m right here and I hate it, forget my dog.”

I’m in public, Renard mused, and so is he, and yet he’s trying to make me blush! He peeked one last time, watching the chest rise and fall, watching the conversation fizzle out, watching them shake hands and making plans to meet for another match. There was now a perfect measure of hues mixed on the palette. He resumed studying the oak’s leaves, sketching out with deliberate impasto strokes. The leaves seemed to wave gently in a breeze higher up, out of his reach, but so real. The carved initials remained unmoving, immutable, suddenly in his field of view. As if in a trance, he put away the green brush and selected the one he had used to paint the bark, now mixing and touching up the trenches in the wood. Two letters, he wasn’t sure which as the handwriting had never been very legible to him, surrounded by a heart. In his peripherals, the leaves kept swaying.

Rise and fall. Rise and fall. Immortalized. He considered time again, how in his youth he had watched his partner inhale like he had before the growl, except back then he didn’t growl. Then, it had been the precursor to a resigned sigh, shuffling vellum, and more breathing. Back then, it wasn’t quite “partner.” Didn’t matter, either. Rise and fall. He knew Renard couldn’t see movement very clearly and, initially, made the effort to hold still during conversations when they had the time to speak. Eventually it wasn’t deliberate and became an accommodating habit, even when he was out of Renard’s direct line of sight. One lunch, he was still save for speaking and the rise and fall of his breathing. Renard had been distracted, watching the rhythm, replying enough to carry on the story. Rise and fall. Then, years later, he…

“How’s it coming along?”

Renard startled, making a small noise and clutching the brush tighter before realizing and relaxing. He felt a hand on his shoulder, which gave it a light squeeze before leaving. “You’re one to startle me, somehow.” He shook his head and grinned. “Yet you’ll never make me ruin a line! It’s going quite well, have a look.”

“B and L. Do the mysterious B and L know you’ve been including them in each of this series?” “Are those the letters! I’ve never been able to tell. I confess: I’ve been scribbling to approximate letters.” “Well, it looks like a B. I think? No, I believe.” “What a foul pun. I’d have it no other way.”

Renard checked for the sake of checking. No rise, no fall. The eerie stillness they’d both gotten accustomed to. “Say, do you remember– No nevermind, of course you do. Ah, no I’ll ask anyway. Do you remember how you used to breathe? Before the… All of that.” He watched his partner seem to wither, but only internally.

“Absolutely. I miss it, what I do now isn’t refreshing. It does the trick, but it’s not the same. Why?” “Oh, I watched you scaring those lads. You took what appeared to be such a deep breath. And, I– Well you know, I missed it. When we both felt a different type of alive.”

“We can’t take it back. I’m not sure if I would, I mean… Or would I? I don’t know sometimes. If we didn’t change, I mean, then–”

“Then we wouldn’t have all of the sunsets under our belts, and I wouldn’t be able to catalog this tree.” “...and I wouldn’t have had closure. So it’s… Not all bad. The breathing is not refreshing, but I don’t need to breathe to have a still moment.”

“Arguably, you’re moreso! Even now, don’t think I haven’t noticed, you still hold as still as a stone when you’re talking to me.” Renard winked. “You should have a medal for not using your hands.”

“Ey, now listen here, you!” Fake indignation, complete with an emphatically shaken fist. “I, for one, am thoroughly threatened.” He feigned being attacked, dramatically. “Would you bring the defeated welp a sip of cold water?” “Yes, just a second. I could use a drink too.”Well. Perhaps the initials could be changed, mutable after all under the brush. Changed suddenly.

#corda #short fiction #microfiction #oc art

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killemwithkawaii · 2 years ago

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[This was a submission by @meadow-hearthfire but tumblr doesn't like publishing submissions for some reason 🤡]

youtube

Mitch, would you give this video a watch or at least a listen? Emily Artful offers some artist advice in it.

Oh, and before you check out her content, I gotta offer a content warning: Emily Artful is a mom of two kids, so a few of her videos contain pregnancy and some feature her kids, including a vlog of after she just had her first kid. As of submitting this to you, her oldest (nicknamed "Bini") is about five years old and her youngest (nicknamed "Wiggy") is about two.

--------------------------------------

A Note From K.E.W.K.:

>This is a great video. I feel her SO MUCH! I have definitely undertaken HUGE projects that I vastly underestimated the timeframe/workload for and it ended up biting me in the ass. (I think it's something that all artists do tbh) 😓

>Those of you who have been around the blog for a while probably know about my yearly goretober undertaking. Its a self-indulgent passion project and an enormous labor of love that I'm overall pretty proud of, but no matter how hard I work during those times or how well everything turns out, I'm always left super burnt out at the end and HATE what I've created because it never lives up to the unrealistic expectations I had for the project, which leads to me beating myself up about how it should have been better (despite me knowing that I sincerely gave it my all). I have cried during every goretober event (managed to make it until the 26th this year!🥇) and have reached points mid-event where I wanted to say 'fuck it' and stop before it was finished, but I've managed to push through each time because, even if it didn't turn out perfect, I knew it was worth finishing (even if the home stretch was fueled by spite lol). After it's done, I always need to take a big step back, and then I revisit it with a fresh perspective when I'm ready. Even though it might not have ended up like I wanted, I usually end up appreciating my work for what it turned out to be once those negative feelings have calmed a little. After all, the audience can't see the vision in your head, just the work you put out there, so they'll just enjoy it for what it is! ^^

>I also really like that she says that it's okay to feel those negative feelings about projects that 'failed'. Being told/ telling yourself to cheer up and not feel down about something never actually helps you feel better, it just makes you feel bad about feeling bad, which makes it very hard to stop feeling bad! It's much better to feel your feelings so you can process them instead of burying them, even if it's hard at the time. It's also good to remember that, whenever you do something, there is always a chance of 'failure', and the best way to handle that is to look at it as an opportunity to learn what went wrong so you can do better next time. A master had failed more times than a novice has tried (that's the only way to become a master!) ✅

>DO NOT THROW AWAY YOUR '''''BAD'''' ART!! EVER!!! You will look back on it someday and be able to say, 'wow, I sure have come a long way! c:' and you would be surprised how much it might mean to other people. I have boxes of sketch books dating back to when I was a tween, and it's absolutely crazy to see how much improvement I've made over the past 15 years. Hell, I look back at the art I made 3 years ago and think the same thing! But, I don't delete those drawings because I did my very best on them at the time, and despite the flaws I see in them now, they mean a lot to other people, which means a lot to me 🤗💖💖💖

Thanks so much for sharing this with me, Meadow! I really appreciate it :D

#submission #k.e.w.k. answers #meadow chan #tw negative self talk #November 2022 was really rough for me because I felt like The Staycation was a complete flop #BUT I WORKED MY ASS OFF AND LEARNED A TON AND AT LEAST SOME PEOPLE LIKED IT SO GODDAMNIT IT WAS WORTH IT 😤💖💖💖#Youtube

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goodfully · 7 months ago

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long time no post.. life updates? grad school really is kicking my butt</3 i finished up my first year tho and am currently taking classes over the summer semester as well. i'm trying to pick myself back up and be more alive again, but it has been difficult honestly hahaha

it's funny bc halfway through last semester, i thought i had to drop out of grad school or else i was going to kms, but here i am still in school and still alive! also ofc with all the protests more recently (free palestine!), i think i was just so drained of everything. on the other hand, i'm happy with the papers i had written in my classes and i just submitted one of them to a philosophy and education conference, i really hope it gets accepted... i also just paid my overdue housing fees and tuition for the summer semester.. LOL help

readings updates? i read milton's "paradise lost" over last semester for a class and it was absolutely brilliant honestly. genuinely i need to read the bible LOL anyway i had started reading iris murdoch's "the black prince" but i haven't been able to continue reading past the nussbaum's intro since my classes started again. i also really desperately want to read steinbeck's "east of eden" hahaha but i only have time to read stuff i have to read for classes. i imagine that i wont be able to finish reading dostoyevsky's "the idiot" and tolstoy's "anna karenina" either until after i graduate... it makes me a little bit sad, i wish i had more time. i guess that's why i haven't posted anything here either, since the reason i made a tumblr account in the first place last year was to ramble about "the brothers karamazov" and "my brilliant friend" and i havent read a single book for fun this year so far</3

admittedly, i've been feeling sooo alone..! one of the things on my summer bucket list is to start seeing a therapist but i still cant get myself to do it hahaha i dont think theres anything a therapist could say to me that i havent already thought about to myself. i think what i actually need is get diagnosed, is it autism or personality issues or ocd..? but what do i know, right! regardless.. i'm also just so busy with my jobs and with my classes and with resting by self isolating in all the times between.

hmm i've gotten five more piercings since the start of the year and i've been somewhat keeping track of time based on when i got my piercings and when i'll get my next one... i don't know what this means but it's just been a little concern of mine that i can't seem to ground myself unless i can feel a part of my body "healing"...

also.. happy pride! global queer liberation! ahh, happy pride to fellow aroace ppl! haha thats another thing ive come to terms with recently. as far as my "summer bucket list" goes besides potentially seeing a therapist, i'd like to kiss somebody, get my hair dyed, get more piercings haha, go to a club wearing just a binder and a mini skirt, get back into learning calc and sketching..! alright, i think that's all for life updates here... tbh this is probably more for me to vent hahaha all the best wishes

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katsungtongunit06 · 2 years ago

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Evaluation

After going through previous works and observing between numbers of artists' works along with present trends. It has come to a complete tense for our Unit 6 Final Main Project and the course itself, I've learnt a lot of essential traditional skills, technical skills or even managing.

From group based project (Studio Culture, Bila Law Academy Commissions) to personal developing. It was obvious that 3D was overall my main approach, yet it was also pleasing to have a great amount of pocket skills.

On the end of 2021. I've started my journey and develop my skill set in Matthew Boulton College, we had a good start by looking into pure technical skills in Adobe software. In photoshop, we looked into layer masking and common skills like fonts or shape and size ratio along with theory researches like camera movement, art style, ethical and logical thinking. During that period of time, as a new user on Adobe software was challenging due to lack of knowledge on UI and functions.

As we move forward to year 2 with the information and skill sets we've learnt along during year 1, the amount of data we're demanded to show up and analysis have had increased and as well as greater knowledge on create like color theory, skeuomorphism, design theory, commissions and how to operate a group of artists ourselves as we looked into cultures and studio.

Looking into the industry places, with the assist from tutors we were able to understand what is it to actually enjoy else's work pieces. In order to read it's creator's mind and take benefit was not an easy task. Following with the effect of emotion on them, the greater a story teller we could be in the future.

By reviewing what we've complete during the course, there was a lot of spots that I myself do find really challenging and mistakes were done.

From Unit 4, I have had experienced the problem of hardware and storage issues and giving a result of a great amount of works and experiment evidences getting deleted with only one week left to unit 4's submission date. Next on unit 5, we've been challenged with two briefs being given to us in the same time was the Counter Culture and Studio Culture, allowing us to get an opportunity to submit our own ideas and choice of culture that influence to us. But it only went terrible due to the amount of possibility we could have, ending with the constant action of unsure topics, lack of confident and doubts on whether the choice we did was the right approach. Not only that, as we had group work brief to arrange and advertise ourselves as a studio. The heavily uneven of skill and mind set, the whole project began without any idea developed into the brief. And by evaluating the problems that caused such problems was due to the lack of experience in team management, skill sharing, observation and a clear knowledge on direction. Yet, I also found it interesting as we went along and developing essential skills like developing an understanding of group status and the importance of leadership with the need to get a clear picture on every single member's status.

During that period of time, we're given that we've received a commission from the neighbors academy (the Bila Law Academy) and was told to complete it as a group that was selected in studio culture. With a serious lack of experience in the industry, we had to complete a great amount of research to get a picture on standard works being submitted in the present industry.

And as we moved into the last unit on our course, we were told to complete an exhibition after submission. We were also been asked to do sketches about the potential exhibition layout and to analysis why. Although it was lucky that it wasn't as challenge as else thought it would be due to the amount of knowledge I have on 3D layouts. But still to decide the topic and approach on such an important unit, it was clear that most of us were unsure about the approach and it's starting point. And would wish to done better next time in the future.

To move on forward from this course, it would most likely be more beneficial to develop myself a better skill and habit to communicate more and sharing ideas among students which assist me to clarify approach on subjects. And I believe as we move ahead, the more unique personals I would had to face. To overcome it would be my priority approach, mostly by gathering more industry experience and knowledge and develop more skills like taking attentions on details, analysis on people's approach or their styles.

FMP itself

To be honest, I might had repeated some mistakes taken in the previous project but right now after analysing through the overall work flow. There was multiple critical problems like uncertain developments, poor arrangement and mental support during production.

Although it is always to be appreciated to develop more skillset and develop more concept to reinforce my portfolio or the workflow itself. But overcomplicating it would create pure confusion on audiences, which also applies to it's poor arrangement. The reason why such problems were developed from multiple possible causes. Like, undetailed plan tree being developed or unrelatable attempts on the project itself. And as it would hurt audience's mind and resulting in they not being able to enjoy my journey in this project and my developments made.

Evaluation in format

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icaruskey · 1 year ago

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I realized this was getting too long for a straightforward reply in the notes so

@noogit9000

If we're talking specifically fanfiction, the past week or so has been pretty much everything I've written (notably, not thought about, just written down) that wasn't like. Deleted do to frustration or a change in plans. Example being me trying to write HD Y/N leaving work after the mugging, so they would already be in contact with Sun. I just didn't like it, didn't like the job (convenience store), didn't like any of it. So after writing that introduction out three different ways, it got trashed and rewritten with what I ended up with.

And this is pretty much me writing while under an incredible amount of pressure. I've been seriously stressed about school, finances, looming homelessness, work, my still very much broken foot, etc. I don't know what made me snap and start writing for pillow's aus, but it's like since it's not mine, since I'm not publishing a chronological story to ao3 like I was with Constellations, it's... easier? And I think everyone likes it when someone treats their ideas with the same joy that you put into them, so knowing I'm making Pillow's day a little brighter helps with all the stress.

And the neat thing is I'm actually a pretty damn good writer. I've been writing for over half my life now (18 years!), and one of my side hustles is actually writing serial form erotica on commission (as well as random shorts). I've got plans on working my way into the professional publishing industry as a hobby (I want to write middle school lit as well as YA), and my career aspirations include creating a long running comic. I also beta read a lot when I'm not in school because I find it valuable to be able to critique someone else's work and they seem to find value in my being rather. I guess ruthless is a good word for it?

I get away with first drafts for a lot of stuff, including a lot of my graduate writing. My teachers genuinely have no idea that most of the time I'm not even engaging my brain until I give it a quick glance over before hitting submit. And that's the writing y'all aren't seeing right now. I'm working on a proper artist statement, some exhibition reviews, a couple papers on pop feminism and magical girl genre history, and of course the big boy, the actual comic script. Which is not something I intend to show off anytime soon since I've gotten some feedback on a critical scene being rather wooden.

But yeah, I do know my writing is, even at a base level, pretty decent. It just hurts when I actually read what I wrote and see shifting tenses, overused stylistic choices (specifically in regards to breaking grammar rules), etc. And worst of all; it just doesn't feel deep. The emotion is there, but it's like a sketch of what's in my mind. It's short and halted, and I kinda hate it and want to push it farther.

Which is very probably what I'll do once I graduate. For now, I want to keep writing as much as possible to contrast the heavy duty shit I'm doing for school and my career. It's fun! And I have to admit, it's a bit of an ego boost to see my follower count grow. I can only hope to continue to provide thoughts and words that satisfy everyone's need to feel things deeply and have it stick with you long after you're done.

After all, it's only fair. It's what Pillow's art has been doing to me.

Oof I just read some of my own writing and am cringing.

Probably one day when things feel more complete I'll do a stylistic overhaul and post it on AO3

Actually. That might be good to do once I graduate. It's a good goal

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drawing-prompt-s · 2 years ago

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Dec. 7th, 2022 Message

Your local Prompt Prophet isn't feeling the best tonight so it is just Prompt's queued up for the next 24 hours - which may extend into tomorrow as well, depending on how I feel by the early morning hours. Which is is usually when I Q up this blog for the following day. So do not forget to send in some prompts if you've been hiding them!!

Heads up, the rest of this is very long and i got kinda sappy thinking about having run this blog, and then thinking about all of you guys. <3

There is also an ask sitting in my inbox I need to get to regarding what art I do and do not reblog - if there is something you can do to ensure it. And the short answer is there is not. I do not always check older prompts, so I miss a lot of art at times. But mostly it just boils down to me being a single person running this blog. I cannot reblog every piece. On top of that, for those of you that do more than one of them! I see and love them, do not be discouraged if you do not see me reblog another, I just try to avoid reblogging more than one to give other artists a chance to shine as well!

I also just wanted to take a moment and say thank you to everyone who submits prompts, responds with art, reblogs others art, and generally just interacts with this blog. I cannot expression how much I adore and appreciate you all - i see a lot of the kind words you send or sometimes write back to me in tags or reblogs. They mean a lot. Occasionally it can feel that my responses are either thought of as fake enthusiasm, or unwelcome in some regards. But as I have said before, with well over 70,000 of you following this blog, I am bound to get some disagreement with how I run things here. Nevertheless, the sweet comments and asks that I see help in ensuring I know that not only are my responses getting across to the vast majority how I want them to (with genuine love and enthusiasm for the artists and the wonderful art they share with us), but in knowing that they are uplifting for others of you as well.

I know art can be challenging, and thankless at times - especially when you crave validation. I know artist block and life in general can halt the content that you want to create. The things you want to do. I know age and differing skill levels can make it hard to think you will ever reach where you want to be. But just remember that every piece you put out there, every practice sketch or warm up, is one more piece of art in the world that didn't previously exist. And I, and so many others, are cheering you on!

I am so glad that I have been able to be here on this blog with you all for the last few years (i honestly do not even know when I took over, compared to the prior admin, it has been a while at the least). And I have cherished every second of it.

So here is to the hope that we will have more years to come - and even if you feel you need to step away from art, just know if you ever want to come back, well, that is the fun thing about art, it never really leaves!

-- Prompt Prophet

#prompt prophet #promphet speaks #drawing-prompt-s #a message and some love for all of you too #update #and an update

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winxsource · 2 years ago

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Under the cut @faytalepsy tells us everything about how artistic process, juggling writing and drawing and her predictions for season 2!

If you’ve had the pleasure of meeting Fay, then you may already be familiar with the term “polymath”, even if you don’t know it. This term, coined in 1603 by Johann von Wowern, describes a person who is talented in many manners and fields of study. /*

I, for one, think that Faytalepsy - who’s a fanfic writer, digital artist, traditional artist, singer, actress and a biology major, among many other things - definitely qualifies for the title.

We have our interview on Thursday morning, after trying and failing to set up a meeting twice before because her schedule is beyond filled. Nevertheless, despite the hectic procedure that is setting up this meeting, Fay’s the type of person to put everyone at ease. So, despite our lack of familiarity, I feel myself slumping on my chair and relaxing as I hear her narrate the shenanigans happening in her current play - which is a romantic comedy that would be opening that weekend.

It’s listening to her mellow voice and calm personality that I ask her how long she’s been in fandom overall and, to my surprise, I come to learn she’s much younger than the way she sounds. She’s just starting college after a gap year and she’s been in fandom, actively, for something like seven or nine years, qualifying her as a creator who grew up in the internet, submitted to its critical eye from a young age.

Anyone who has put forward work to be reviewed by strangers online will know how nerve wrecking it is and yet, she tells me she’s entirely self-taught. Never took a single drawing course, definitely not one for writing either. No, Fay’s unbothered by the external criticism, because she’s a perfectionist and an overachiever. Art classes used to piss her off, because all they did were collages and she wanted to do more.

It’s this desire to see more and beyond that got her started into fanarts in the first place, she tells me. “I’ve always loved to draw, but I wasn’t really good at it, since I only did it in my free time. Being engaged with fandom forced me to practice more, because I wanted to draw the scenes I envisioned, but didn’t have the skillset for it yet. So I practiced and I practiced.”

I tease her about her type A personality and she doesn’t seem bashful or even shies away. Instead, Fay owns it up with pride, a true overachiever who tells me, “I’m definitely a perfectionist, but I don’t want to hold myself to ‘perfection' standards anymore, I want to have fun. A few years ago I was nearly mortified whenever I started something new, because I thought I wouldn’t be able to do it and then would become discouraged, but now I’ve grown and I've embraced having it be just ‘fun’ and not as perfect. I try loads of things and I will continue to do that, because you find a lot of things you enjoy and are good at, if you try a lot of things.”

Of course, this isn’t always easy and perfectionism still creeps up here and there. Her writing being the biggest point of contention.

“I have lots of unfinished works, such as the next chapter of “Sweet Nectar Of Life”, because I can’t post it like this. It isn’t perfect!”

This brings me to our next topic, a question sent in by not only @septemberrie, but also @lizzabet. With so many WIPs and different endeavors, how does she manage her time? How does she juggle so many works in progress?

She pauses, weighing the question carefully before explaining, “a year back I didn’t have a good balance. I wrote whenever I wanted to write, only drew when inspiration hit and then I’d go weeks without one or the other. Now I try to actively change that by sketching everyday for 5 or 20 minutes. I don’t want to have too much time pass between publishing new fic and releasing new art, I want to keep a steady progress. If you let weeks pass before you look at your art again, then it’s easy to feel demotivated, because when you come back, you’ll find a bunch of mistakes. So now I really don’t allow myself so much time in between those.”

With such discipline and so many projects, I ask her how she decides to make the leap and upgrade a concept from mere “idea” to “work in progress”?

“Oh, I just write whatever I want to write,” it's her easy answer, “Sometimes one gets neglected for the other, but that's alright. I have a folder for all my works and every once in a while, I switch the documents around, so I can visually see what I have to work on next. Still, even then, it depends on inspiration. For example, some of my multi chapters were never meant to be multi chapters, they just spiraled into it.”

And how’s your writing process?

“It depends. Usually I have an idea, in Yield I just knew I wanted to write something about them sparring. Then when I have some down time I try to think about how to link the scenes and how they develop. Sometimes I write down the first scene that popped to mind and then later I come back and link the scenes together. Sometimes I have a plan, for example in my multi chapter fics, I always knew what I wanted to happen. I’d write down the topics, like “nightmare”, and then write the scene from that. The writing process itself is a little chaotic. I do always try to have one chapter be at least 1,5k words, because I think it’s the necessary amount to develop the plot. My optimal word count per chapter is between 2k and 3k.”

Her writing process is very clear cut, incredibly methodical. I ask her if her approach to the characters is equally ruled, if she tries to write them to follow canon or if she allows herself to steer away from canon, in the name of fanon and entertainment.

I can almost hear her shrugging, as she answers, “I don’t think anyone has the 100% true to canon grasp of the characters. I try to do my take of them, which while close to canon, can move away if the situation asks for it. For example in Checking The Inventory, where Farah and Saul make out in the closet, I don’t think it would happen in canon, but I was willing to do it in my own writing. Regardless, one thing I enjoy about Fate’s loose writing is that it gives us a lot of freedom to play with.”

And how does Faytalepsy interpret Farah and Saul in canon, how does she envision their relationship?

“I don’t think that in canon they’re romantically involved, they wouldn’t dare to take that step. However, they clearly both care about each other, because they went through so much, and both have this desire to be more than a friendship. They have roles to fulfill and responsibilities, so they’d be waiting for the right moment and this moment never comes,” she pauses then and I ask about inspirations, which seems to tip Fay to continue on her previous answer as she stitches the ending, “I’m not sure how my interpretation of their personalities came to be, but probably through reading other people’s fanfics and chatting about it.”

Because all art is referential, a constant taking and picking from other, never ending telephone game. Nevertheless, even in this eternal game of telephone that is producing content, especially transformative works such as fanfic and fanarts, you can see a person’s personality shine through. In Fay’s case, her fanfics are lyrical, emotionally loaded and incredibly immersive. Fay’s works will suck you in a character’s head space and you’ll come out dizzy with her beautiful descriptions and her ability to put a character under the microscope. Her fanarts are filled with color, dramatic lighting – look no further than this drawing of silrah in a dramatic sunset – and very sensual, showcased by the many many drawings of Saul almost worshiping at Farah’s altar — such as here.

Her drawing and painting inspirations are diverse, a mismatch between indie instagram artists and the grand masters, because she really loves walking through museums. Nevertheless, if she had to pick one piece, it would be Van Gogh’s Starry Night.

Always the overachiever, though, she has projects still waiting for the perfect moment to happen, the perfect “skill set” as Fay herself puts it. One example being a painting of Saul in his cell after he’s captured, with Farah’s ghost appearing in the cut outs of the moonlight, which leaks in through the bars before him.

What about her expectations for season 2? Or even, the hanging conflict between Andreas and Saul?

Her answer, very much as her art, is dramatic:

“I want to see Sky kill Andreas and ultimately choose Saul as his father. In fact, I want to see Sky killing Andreas more than Saul killing Andreas. I wonder if all those years in isolation made Andreas a little crazy… I want to see Saul struggle with what Sky did, but eventually for him to realize he did the right thing by killing Andreas. In regards to season two… First of all I’m really afraid. I love Farah and I’ll spend all my wishes on her coming back. I’m really excited to see in what direction the show goes and to learn more about Rosalind and what her goals are. I’m not as interested in the teenagers, shocking I know, but because I’m not as emotionally invested, I’m open to a lot more things. I really want to see what’s going to happen with Beatrix. She has the potential to become Rosalind’s henchwoman or to turn against Roz and I like either option.”

We then move onto the quick fire questions, the one she doesn’t have as much time to ponder over and definitely my favorite part of the interview, seeing as sometimes you can see a person shocked by their own answer.

What is she expecting from Saul’s character development in season two? (It’s important to note, this interview happened before the trailer had been dropped).

She hesitates, “expecting or wishing for? Wishfully expecting, given that he shows up at all, I want him to face his demons. He’s been suffering from it, but he just projected it all onto Sky. He hasn’t really worked through his trauma and now he’ll be forced to do it. I really really want to see him grow more into the role of a father to Sky, accepting that over the years he has raised Sky. Of course, I want to see how he deals with Farah’s death, I don’t want this swept under the rug. I can’t say what I expect there, because we’re all in the dark when it comes to Farah… Oh and I want him to survive!”

Talking about Farah, does she believe they’ll manage to bring her back?

Now there’s no hesitation, seeing as it is the number one question on this side of the fandom, the most pressing question in almost any social media when it comes to Fate.

“I really want to believe it. Because I love Farah and she’s basically the whole reason I watch the show, but I really don’t want to hope as much, because then I’ll be disappointed. Silrah and Farah have been really popular, so it could be that they saw that and worked her in. I don't think they had it planned from the beginning though,” the ever realistic Fay's got her hopes down and her feet firmly planted on the ground, “I hope there will be at least an attempt to bring her back. What about the ethics of bringing a person back from the dead? I don’t care. Personally my headcanon is that she hasn’t really died, as in the cartoons where she’s transformed into a tree. In case she really is dead, though, and they bring her back, then I think the repercussions must be more severe. I don’t want a zombie, but I do want to see some consequences from that act alone.”

What is it that she enjoys writing about silrah the most?

“I think the thing I love about silrah most is the chance to portray the pining… The longing. The scene that inspired me the most in the canon is the scene at the end of episode 2, when they’re alone in the office. Having trauma but still going out of your way to care for those you love. The aspect I like writing most is angst, in one of my first fics, “Fighting For You” - there’s a scene where he realizes she’s in danger and Farah is fighting for her life, Saul thinks she’s going to die, and all this despair and suspense melts away as he finds her. That uncertainty, the pain and then the subsequent melting off… That’s what I enjoy writing.”

I hit her with the dreaded question among creators, but Fay isn’t daunted by it - she embraces it, with a vivacity that’s present in all of her creations, including in this interview. Fay is just one of those people whose confidence, or rather, bravery, is inspiring.

Which work is she most proud of?

“I really liked one of the earlier paintings I did of them dancing, because it was there I realized my art had come a long way from when I started. Also the one I did for the winxsource prompt of Farah and Rosalind. For fanfic this is much harder. I’m really proud of The Seventh Grave. I enjoyed writing Yield and Sweet Nectar of Life, but especially Fighting for You, because it’s been my longest fanfic and, since it is still ongoing, it’s my companion.”

What about her three favorite fic tropes?

“Slowburn, enemies to lovers… There’s only one bed”

And three tropes she despises?

“I don't like forced marriages… Sometimes they’re written really well and I do enjoy it, but it’s hard to come by. I don’t understand the hype with coffee shop AUs and I really don’t care about pregnancy fic.”

When it comes to writing, any specific inspirations?

“Oh anything by @septemberrie - Skye - and specifically “The Grief That Does Not Speak”, written by Sae_G. All of their works are amazing. I do have to say that I’ve read every single silrah fic that is out there, so all these crumbs, they’re a big part of what inspires me when writing these characters.”

And finally, does she want to shout out to anyone?

Her answer is heartwarming, but Fay drives home how incredibly wise she is too as she says,

“A general shout out to everyone who reads my stuff. I do primarily write for myself, but I love reading through all these comments. Reading through them makes me happy and validates, all over again, what I do. A big shout out to everyone who’s in the discord server, this amazing community we’ve built, and for everyone who talks about silrah,” then with a chuckle, “and for my sister who’s always very rude when I’m drawing.”

- Interview written by @skloomdumpster | Jo

#fate the winx saga #Fate: The Winx Saga #silrah #Farah x Saul #faytalepsy #creatorinterview

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manonamora-if · 2 years ago

Text

Post-comp-mortem

I was debating on whether to publish this post before or after the voting ended. I was wondering if it would influence the player's opinion of the game too much/at all. Even after seeing a few popping up on the Forum, I still felt a bit weird about releasing mine. I was also hoping to get a few more reviews/comments as well :P

If you haven't checked the IF Comp entries this year, I really recommend it!

This post will be hella long too. I am not kidding here, don't click Keep Reading/scroll further if you don't have a drink and are seated, it is almost a novella below. Also, it is a mix of very dry summary/emotional reaction. Like my entry, it might look like a mess. There is a TLDR on the Forum.

Table of Content:

1- Some Points about creation and process 2- So, did I manage to do what I wanted? 3- And what was the verdict? _ _ a. The Reviews _ _ b. Result and Further comments 4- What's the future for TTTT? 5- Some fun tit bits... 6- In Conclusion,

For people who don't follow me here (or only started following me recently), I've only been in the IF Community for about a year and a half by now, with my first game (Meeting the Parents) published in early June 2021. I have only created things with Twine (and mainly on SugarCube) and had not had any coding knowledge before starting my own project.

I- Some points about creation and process.

The Thick Table Tavern was actually conceptualised back in 2021, when I wanted to dip my toes into a bigger competition after completing Exquisite Cadaver. Since I had created MtP and EC (and the first part of CRWL) pretty quickly, I thought the two months ahead of me would be plenty enough to create a whole new game and submit it.

I've always loved Fantasy settings and RPGs, but often wondered why there were very little games centred around less heroic occupations or what would be the life of an NPC, like a bartender in a tavern (probably because it might be pretty boring). I also have very fond memories of those Flash games where you would build meals/drinks (RIP Flash).

I knew from the get-go that two components where going to be central to the game: the drink mixing aspect and your interactions with the NPCs. Instead of having random customers dropping in, I thought of 5 fleshed-out NPCs which would come, talk a bit with you about their story and order drinks. You might have been able to influence them a bit. But that would be it. Above all, I wanted a chill and light vibe, with Trope-y characters (ex: a coward but flirty bard, a pirate always in trouble, etc). I wanted people to relax and have some light fun, and enjoy themselves.

I worked on the project for about 2 weeks, having submitted my intent, started testing some code for the bartending side and written the introduction of the game and 2 characters (give or take 3k words).

Then I kind of... burned out.

Fast forward this summer, and I am back working on the project. Granted, I was not fully into the game at that point, since I was working on the re-writes of EC at the same time too. But I had sketched out the UI and was thinking about the code during writing EC. And I was talking my friends ears off about it too. What I knew for sure, is that the Bartending experience would be the core gameplay/interactivity of the game, with the story wrapped around it (giving you a reason to mix drinks).

Here are some pictures of my very pretty handwriting about the UI and how the story/bartending should be formatted/coded.

Throughout July, I would take breaks from writing EC to set up the UI for this game (or create a SugarCube template because I have not self-control), learn more about grids, flex boxes and class hierarchy. [No joke, I learned A LOT about CSS/HTML with this game!]

August came around and my other projects were put on hold so I could focus on TTTT (I still did other stuffs, because again, no self-control). I probably didn't start writing until the last third of August, as I researched drinks recipe (I still have a form for future drinks addition, you can add your favourite), made lil' bottles and set the bar. Even then, the amount written was pretty marginal compared to September.

September was wild. I wrote about 45k words total during that month, averaging 2.5k/days by the latter half of the month. Not all that I wrote ended up being included in the entry, as I had to cut some NPCs since I didn't feel they were ready (which included a travelling salesman monk). Being oh so lucky, I caught Covid just as the last week of the comp started. And since I hate following my/sound advice, I kept writing and coding through that and insomnia until the last hours of the deadline. This was obviously reeeeaaaaallly dumb, it made me super exhausted after the whole thing, but I still pushed myself and even with the whole hazy brain I managed to submit the game with... a bunch of bugs (and a lot more typos). In retrospect, that should have been my sign to pause the project and submit next year.

All and all, I don't think I spent more than 3 months on the game, during which half of that time was being shared with other projects (old and new ones). Still, my goal was to submit a working game... and to rank in the top-half of the ranking overall.

II- So, did I manage to do what I wanted?

Short answer: definitely not. But I gave it my best shot...

Long answer: I managed to do more than I thought I would, especially as the deadline crept closer. My plan from the beginning (of this year's try, not the original beginning) was to build the game in 3 stages:

The basic create/serve drinks with no interaction with customers.

The NPCs you only meet once and appear randomly, with choices that have little repercussion on that NPC and story overall.

The Big NPCs who come back multiple times (4/5 times, depending on their story) with choices that impact both the player and the NPC. And you build a bit of relationship with those.

The first stage took a while mainly because I had to create a whole bar from scratch. I could have chosen to stick with a simple design/asset for the bottles (like the one you could see in my first attempts of the bar), but damn, this is the IF Comp, not some basic Jam... Go big or go home! While I didn't struggle too much with the mixing part, it was the serving/check the ingredients and optimisation of the code that gave me a few headaches. {And still does...}

The second step was thwarted almost as soon as I started, when I realised TTTT needed a lot more fluff parts to link each game block (morning, between drinks, end of day) to make the experience smoother. Like the randomness of the drinks I didn't want players becoming bored with starting/ending each days. So there's a lot there that took priority for a while. __Still, I managed to include some NPCs. Out of the 11-ish NPC ideas I had, one was fully included (the oldie couple), one was a re-hash of the last year's version of the Adventurer (Dylan), and one was added last minute out of frustration (the 4th Wall break). The Fortune Teller doesn't really count in my book, as she was always part of the Introduction (and written almost completely last year).

And the last one... *throw hands in the air*

I knew it was going to be very hard to include this one, especially since it required a bit more planning for the day (and work around the randomisation) and having to take into account the different variations. Not being able to include this one ended up not bothering me as much as I thought it would be. I get to keep it for an after-comp update... :D

What I manage to include which was not planned was, like I mentioned, the random linking bits and the long-form Endings. None of them were really interactive (nor had much choice aside from knocking the sign or setting the tip jar), and may have thrown the player off when everything gets randomised by Day 2. There is only the Setting Up/Cleaning the Tavern where you can get the same/similar enough text.

Ezabell and Brom were also not planned at all. In last's year's version, out of the tavern's employees, you'd only interact with your Boss (and Filessandro as one of the recurrent NPCs). I was really happy with Ez especially, and how much colour she brought to the tavern (and writing banter with her was so fun!). She was probably one of my favourite character to write (along with the Oldies).

There were also a lot more things I had to cut for time, whether it was writing or coding. This is a non-exhaustive list: the Tip Jar getting stolen event, The Watcher coming half-way through the game to check on your progress, having more options/choices when talking to people (patrons and employees), having an Ending Recap for the NPCs, having a choice at the End on whether to buy/pursue your original background choice...

So at the end, the agency stayed quite low (where most consequences happen when you create drinks). After the first day, there is very little new choices.

There were many things with the final version that made me frustrated, among others:

Misusing my time, forcing me to cut back on what I wanted to include, just because something new and shiny took over my brain (it's not new, I can have the attention of a toddler sometimes).

Definitely not realising early how much I was trying to include from the get go, in terms of words and code, and how much time I would need to manage it all (lol at me thinking the summer would be enough for this chunky of a game).

The Watcher and Fortune Teller's spiel heavily relied on the player having choices with consequences talking to the recurrent patrons (Step 3) and proposing activities/giving advice to the one-time NPCs (Step 2). Since 3 was scraped, and 2 was not finished... I ended up setting some mystery for pretty much nothing...

Not having a more rigorous proofreading period. A lot of what was written was done so very late into the process, and while I did use some proofreading programs, I should have taken more time to re-read my text, edit it more and correct it all. It is obvious where I put more effort/love... (yes, it's the Oldies)

Have beta testers a bit earlier to catch all the bugs I corrected on Day 1/2 of the voting period (that's related to the time management points above).

Not being able to have more NPC's during the day (adding 3-4 one-timers to the game more would have been great!)

Not having time to include music :(

Getting Covid... (not that I could do much about that :P)

I could have chosen to fix a lot of those issues/add more content half-way through the Comp, but it felt a bit like cheating... And honestly, I was too tired after that.

Still, there are many things I am very proud of achieving:

Actually submit an entry to the Comp (even with the bugs/typos still there...) !

I created a completely new UI all by myself from scratch, which has completely different designs depending on which passage the player is in (Title page, Main Story, Bar, The Notebook/Frenzy List).

Have I talked everyone's ears off about the Bar yet? Definitely not. Because it is hella cool. I spend a lot (maybe too much time) on it, editing each bottle/box so they would feel distinct enough from each other. My first attempt last year was... a whole mess with list points... ew...

I started dabbling more with CSS animations (the menu button in the Main Story, the text shaking, the starting page, etc...), all of which required A LOT of tweaking to get right (and including an accessible option too).

Creating more complicated widgets and learning how to optimise my code (I managed to remove over 500 lines of TwineScript code at once...) which was a fun puzzle to be honest.

Adding very last-minute addition with the Arcade Mode and the Restocking (which taught me about messing with CSS classes at random), which I think was a pretty good addition.

Adding as much accessibility tools as I could (key binding, toggles for animation, text formatting, etc...).

Look at this Passage Map! There's a lot of text/code in those...

Finally... Not submitting the game with only the Bar mixing as the whole game. The mixing mechanic without any text would probably not have gone over well.

Overall, a lot of frustration but also a lot of pride (I definitely felt that last one mixed with anxiety when I pressed the Upload button the first time). I was really impressed with myself for being able to do this much in such short amount of time (considering everything).

Would the game have benefitted from a bit more time, attention and love? Definitely (especially, the writing). Do I regret submitting it like this? Not even one bit! There were a lot of new things I hadn't done before or even came across with my other projects until now. I've gone even deeper into Sugarcube, CSS and even some JavaScript (my nemesis)!

III- And what was the verdict?

Before going into the reviews/comments I got publicly/privately or the ranking/votes (apart from 3B, I wrote this post before the results), I won in the eyes of some important people (to me). Of course the ranking/votes matter to a certain extent, but I feel like I already had a little victory even before the reveal of the ranking. My biggest offline supporters, some of whom never played any IF before (nor knew it existed), absolutely adored the game, especially the bartending bits. My folks were so amazed about what I done (especially as their view of the gaming world was pretty... narrow/negative to say the least). And I was so happy they tried something they never done before too! I'm glad I got to introduce IF to new peeps :P

There was even a small contest with my family on who could get the most drinks done in the Timed Arcade Mode (the 38 cocktail highscore has yet to be broken)! Also, bless my sister for spamming her friends to play the games... They even sent her messages back about what they played and how cool IF is :)

A- The Reviews

[Again, this was written before the results] According to the Review Spreadsheet, I have gotten 13 reviews on the Forum/IFDB: 7 on the Forum (?), 5 on IFDB (9 ratings). This is about the average amount of reviews games got this year. I received a few more messages through Tumblr and Discord about my entry as well. (Note: one review disappeared from IFDB during the voting period)

First of all, I want to thank again every one of you who not only tried the game, left a vote, and for some of you even a review. Everyone who took their time to share what they thought of my little bartender simulation and to answer some question when they stumbled upon some bugs too.

Here are some cute titles of reviews I got: Innovative Bartending Simulator, A lengthy and somewhat heartwarming game about running a tavern, Bar game of my dreams, Lots to like with this one, Beautiful Gameplay, Fun Mixing Minigames...

A few reviewers "played the game" and included drink puns in their reviews, which I absolutely adored. One was really nice and pushed through their first impression of the game to give it a fair shot (I put a nauseating gif in the starting screen, which couldn't be turned off until the next passage...), when they didn't have to.

I should probably mention the elephant in the room before getting into the comments: out of the reviewers on the Forum, only one or two did not run into what we called the Groundhog Day bug (the Brom event repeating itself for no reason), while on Tumblr, only one person ran into it (and even then it was with only one of their playthrough) AS FAR AS I KNOW since I didn't get more reports. Sooo... that really sucked so see :/ Fun fact: Covid was kicking my ass while I was writing that event. Maybe it was a sign...

That bug was something I could not recreate for the life of me, nor did it appear on any savefile I was able to get my hands on (thank you again!). Unluckily for me too, this looked like it was a cache bug: yay for the code not being the culprit (Thanks Twine Discord), booo because this was something that could not really be fixed because it was not browser/extension specific (emptying the cache helped). This obviously/probably affected more people's rating of the game to no fault of my own nor theirs. Just bad luck. The only common denominator here seem to be the IFComp website. Maybe it was the source of the issue? But at the same time I didn't get anymore reports after that... I can't say for sure until I upload the game on itch and more people raise the same issue. Also it worked meh on tablets, my mom showed me... Impossible to click on the garnishes...

SO! I rounded all the comments I got from everywhere (save for the offline one, because they are more than bias and just said I was the best; they swore they were fair in the ratings tho) on a spreadsheet and made two columns: what worked and what didn't. I wanted to address the comments in a Post-Mortem rather than answering them on the Forum too much, partly to avoid writing in an emotional state. I will be paraphrasing below, since quite a few aspects were shared by multiple people. Overall, the reviews were quite positive, ranging from very neutral to overly positive.

The Bartending Mini-Game

Let's start with the Bartending Mixing-bit. From the reviews, it was a bit of a coin flipper. Some REALLY enjoyed the mixing aspect, and how relaxing and fun it felt; others found it too grind-y and monotonous. This is not surprising, game mechanics are very much a personal preference. Though having a randomiser during Frenzy giving you up to 9 drinks meant that someone could end up with making 20 drinks during one day... which is a lot considering the size of story.

The difficulty settings were not as challenging as it appeared, nor did it give any sense of progression in skills. While the latter was partly explained in the story (you've been a bartender for a while, you should know your stuff), it was mainly because I did not think about that at all (or how to implement it). Similarly with the Difficulty Settings, I thought the differences would be large/annoying enough between each of them, but it wasn't really [I did get some interesting ideas from the reviews tho!].

When it came to combining ingredients and serving drinks, some thought it was great fun, other felt some responses were missing. The random colours appearing can be confusing (it's just because it's fantasy ~magic~). And outside of serving drinks to named NPCs, you do not know whether you've done well when serving the drink until the end of the day (that'll be easily fixed with some notifications).

There was a little hitch with the UI, with the longer recipes requiring a bit of scrolling to find the last ingredients (I knew about that, and thought it would still be ok to be left as is, turns out not really :/ ) and some notifications not appearing (known issue with the macro used when clicking too much in a short span). Still the overall visual was really well received, and people really liked the names of drinks and how diverse they were (there were 29 when I submitted). I also forgot cherries were not berries... I should rename the pot Red Fruits instead later...

Shoutout to the Arcade Mode being a bit of an MVP here, making people compete for highscores! (And people sending me good points to make it more fun)

The Writing

This was where I lost a lot of peeps (and for fair reasons). The biggest gripe people had was related to the writing needed a lot more proofreading/edits, as it made reading distracting at best, confusing and boring at worst. This is not new to me, I've had comments about typos on other projects too (there's even a special section to report typos in my usual bug forms...), but it was worse here because of the time constraint (inflicted on myself, having written most of the game in September). Blaming it on English being my second language is not even fair, I could have asked other people to take a look at the text {Some users in the Forum do that!}. Honestly, compared to when I started or where I was even at the start of this year... I've progressed a lot (ahem... current version of MtP still online being a whole mess and a half). I still have a lot to learn and grow in my style, but I'm getting there!

Quite a few reviews advised to cut 25% of text in each passage, as the prose was either awkward, too long, threw the pacing off, or was unnecessary. Again, not really news to me. I am a very descriptive writer, I like to go on and on about small details. [Look at this review...] Still, while I will definitely edit the text (since it is necessary), I don't think the amount of text will be cut this drastically (I like my descriptions, thank you very much :P).

On the plus side, people enjoyed the snarky and humorous tone of the story, making for a fun experience overall. Yay for keeping a consistent funny tone :D

I've had lovely compliments about the dialogue, which is amazing, because it's a thing I struggle with the most (aside from proofreading, lol). It's so hard to be sure to have distinct voices between characters (and keep that up), have a good pace/back and forth between them, etc... I think working on the EC re-writes just before (which is 95% dialogue) helped me a lot there.

The Story

I've also had positive return on the story itself, as it was playful and chill. Some even found the story immersive with cute and fun storylets. Honestly, I tried to have fun while writing. Each tit bit was framed to bring a laugh or a smile in mind. This was the tone I wanted throughout the whole game anyway, and I am glad people vibed with it. Some also found the worldbuilding intriguing (I got quite a handful of asks about it after the release).

On the other hand, some found the story having nothing to say, with a lot of missed opportunity in the theme and concepts introduced leading to nothing or being brushed off quickly. A large part of it has to do with me cutting a lot of the story to make the deadline, removing a lot of choices (because variations would require more writing and time). The rest of it being just... life. The game's story is essentially a slice-of-life. Life doesn't always make sense and is often just random. There's not point to it.

Still the replayability of the game was noted, with the amount of randomisation of the fluff text. I made sure there was enough variation for players who needed the full 14 days to complete the game (sooo much writing 😭).

Another issue related to the pacing, was with the introductions. Because I did not just do one, I made two of them. It made sense in my head, since I was probably thinking wayyyy to ahead (with all the planned aspects of the game included) and thought it would be the best way to introduce, well, everything. But it made the first day needing more than 30min to complete (which is already 1/4 of the allocated voting play per game). The first intro felt very long and required a lot of clicking (or space-bar pressing with the keybinds). Both were very disjointed with the other. And fair... after the first day, it's pretty much thought of being a bad dream (even when you meet the 4th wall character).

With how the story was written, it left very little choice for the players to have (if you disregard choosing to serve a good drink or not), with most having little consequences on the story as a whole. The only thing driving your end result was either running into a bug (fixed) or getting the required amount of gold. This was not always noted positively. Again, understandable, I had to cut a lot more than planed to make the deadline, turning the MC's agency into a very minimal state. Still, some reviewers did not mind or realised how little choice you actually have (thank you Mixing section and Characters for the distraction!).

The Characters

My pride and joy. And also more positive comments there. Almost everyone had something nice to say about the characters, whether it was finding them overall quite fun or well-constructed. There were so many lovely adjectives used about the NPCs, I was so so so so happy people liked them as much as I did.

From the storylets, the Oldie Adventurers seemed to be everyone's favourite (they were mine as well) and the 4th Wall Character got a good laugh (yay for self-deprecating humour). Getting this kind of response was SO validating.

Aside from it, the tavern's employees/boss were also well received, even if they were quite the stereotypical kinds. Hey... If it works, it works!

Some found the camaraderie between the tavern peeps touching (which works even more if you get a "good" ending). A few notes were given on the confusing appearance of Brom, which is fair because depending on the randomisation of the text you'd get introduced to him as the cook or you'd just think he'd be a weirdo doing strange things in the tavern. Similarly, the characterisation of the boss felt confusing for some, going from incompetent hardass to loving "uncle" for no reason.

At least one point in this section should be taken for the character of the Watcher. A character you only see at the start and end of the story, does not have any impact on the game aside from introducing you and asking you how you liked your run. Understandably, it was a let down. I used the character a bit as an introduction of the character (I had more MC characterisation choices in mind), with the plan of commenting more on your choices in the ending... which doesn't really happen because there are very few choices to talk about. Still, I stand by my choice of keeping the Watcher. It gives it a bit of a mystical air you'd have in a fantasy setting :P My first idea with the Watcher was to make it a Dungeon Master and the player is a TTRPG character... but after writing it it felt way too weird, so I scrapped it.

The Interface

I don't think I've had anything but compliments about the UI and visuals of the games. From the Bar and its bottles, to the different pages, it was praised for the polish and care I gave the game. Considering I spent a lot of time on it, it was nice to hear about this. People found the interface welcoming and colourful. The UI was consistent throughout the game, and little was left to be desired. Someone even said it was the prettiest Twine game they had ever seen, while another found it having the most accomplished visual designed by pushing the rules of CSS this much.

😊

I've had good return about the accessibility points: especially the keybinding (you technically don't need a mouse to play the game), which is not often present in Choice-Based games, and the font options for ease of reading.

Aside from an obvious accessibility mistake I need to fix (the already mentioned nauseating intro gif), there was not much to add about it. It was crisp and high-production and definitely took too much time making it look the way it did.

OH: the Tarot Cards. Even if it amounted to nothing (because why would it... :P ), people liked the Tarot Cards :D

Miscellaneous Comments

Here is the part where I discuss comments I didn't know where to file.

The randomised encounters added to the bartending experience for some (since this is what would happen in real life...), but it also meant that some players did not get to see some characters. While the randomisation helped the replayability aspect, if the player did not enjoy the introduction it would have been unlikely they would press the restart button (I didn't put a fast play link for that...).

Similarly, some enjoyed the structure of each day, while others found the repetitiveness of the tasks boring. Like with the Mixing part, this might be more of a personal preference, it did not really seem to skew one way or another.

Having the Restoking event or the Tip Jar amounting to nothing was also disappointing (latter cut for time, the former only realised after I submitted the game -would need to re-edit the whole bar code to make it work as intended).

There were a few other frustrating bugs (the raised ones were taken care of as soon as I got them, but it included the gold not tracking properly, which always gave the player a bad ending), but with a game this large and complex (in the coding part), I am sure there are still some here and there. I am still dedicated to polish this game (see the final section) but some things will take a while to implement/write. The gold tracker was set one line too high on the code page.... sigh

A last point I wanted to address here was about TTTT not knowing what kind of game it wants to be. To me it is obviously clear, since I made it, but I think I now understand why players might feel that way (I didn't when the review dropped, it even made me a bit angry, even if the comment held some truth). The game starts with a mysterious character never seen until the end, and the mystery amounts to nothing as the player is left in the dark (pun). Then, we move to a more slice-of-life-y fantasy setting with a bartending sim. Then you serve a Fortune Teller that pushes the idea of agency, which goes nowhere because there are virtually no real choices in the game. Aside from getting little to no tips, the Bartending section does not change nor indicate how you are doing. Then you flip between light-hearted storylets and others with more dark undertone. Repeat until you reach an ending. When experienced that way, yeah... what's that game about? What does it want to do? What's the point of it? __Frankly, there's no point to the game, aside from chilling at a bar, making drinks and talk to people. Winning or losing does not mean life/death, you don't hurt anyone really (unless you make terrible drinks, but even then). It's about the vibe more than anything else. Relax and enjoy and mix some ingredients.

So, what, then?

While a very reductive and deprecating conclusion would be that my entry was all show and no substance, it would be misrepresenting a lot of positive aspects of the game. It is definitely very Show but the Substance is lacking in some part (duh, since I cut a lot) or need some extra care for it to reach what it should have been.

I kinda shot myself in the foot by focusing so much time/effort on making sure the bartending experience and UI was not only working fine but that it was visually pleasing, since it meant rushing through writing a whole game in such short amount of time. It might have given quite a few player too high of an expectation on what the game would be (though I tried to warn it in my blurb that it was more of a chill type of game). I was too ambitious with what I wanted to do with this game, especially more in the time frame. It happened in other Jams (for EC and SPS IH). Unfortunately, it didn't pay off here.

A huge saving grace, it seemed, was found in the characters (outside of the Watcher and maybe the Fortune Teller). Had they not be charming or interesting, TTTT would have done much worse than it did.

Overall, it worked for some people and not for others. Even if it didn't work for some, they were kind enough to leave me extensive reviews about what didn't work for them and what they would have done to enhance the gameplay (thk u 💚). And even when it worked, I got some lovely suggestions to make the game even better.

But how did I handle it all?

I did not, because I never do :P

With this edition of the IFComp being my first, it was honestly nerve-wracking. The IFComp is considered the SuperBowl/Olympics of IF and amazing pieces of IF have been released during the previous editions. Before I submitted mine, I knew a few other participants who had submitted before were planning on having an entry (and I really like their works). It was also going to be my first time getting reviews outside of essentially the "chill" Tumblr/Itch crowd. I had seen those long reviews on IFDB around Comp season and honestly it scared me a bit (even if everyone were so very lovely).

As the reviews were dropping in, I was wondering if maybe I should have forgone submitting (or even withdrawing), spent more time on the game (I really should have) and submitted at the SpringThing instead. My entry had nothing to say, it was just there, sipping on a cocktail and enjoying the vibes. This feeling got increasingly worse when I played other entries and compared my work to theirs (so many amazing ones).

My goal was to reach the top-half of the ranking (this year, the lowest ranking for half would have been 35?). Half-way through October, I was dead-sure that I wouldn't even reach that rank. Now that we are hours away from the Voting Deadline, I think it will be just fine. It won't be so good that I will reach top 10, but that reasonable starting goal will be doable. Though I might be a tad disappointed if I don't...

B- Results and Further Comments

It is now Sunday 20th. The results dropped yesterday... 37th out of 70. Honestly, I can't hide I was disappointed a tad. I was this close to reach my goal (by 2 spots). I think I am more disappointed I was so close to this goal and didn't reach it more than I didn't rank high.

For anyone interested (though I already posted it yesterday, this is a screenshot of how the voting went:

I was kinda surprised to see 1s and 2s in there. Though, sure if judges played during the first days, when I was still ironing out some bugs, it's understandable. There was even someone in the anonymous comments who encountered that Ground-hog Day bug (I wonder if they left a review, because I didn't receive anything about this one outside of the reviews/one ask on Tumblr). Someone else had ran into a strange bug with the Fortune teller has well (again never heard about this one either...). Of course, everyone has their metrics... but 1 is pretty much unplayable/doesn't belong in the Comp... and I don't know. It's not sitting right with me because TTTT doesn't feel like either? _ _ At the end, everyone has an opinion. If they really hated the experience, so be it. You can't please everyone... *shrug* Looking at the curve, I was a tinsy disappointed there were not 10s, it would have made the curve so much more satisfying to watch... I think my family's votes looked too much like spam as well (or they didn't fill in their form correctly), cause they ranted their score was not there after I sent them the result. Bless them, they tried.

Regarding the anonymous comments, there wasn't much that stood out that hadn't been spelt out for me in the reviews/direct feedback: UI great, story meh, atmosphere is nice, needs more proofreading/pruning of the text, bartending is fun/tedious (this is really a coin toss damn). My favourite comment: as-is it's borderline unreadable.

The most interesting comment I got out of it was whether my entry should be considered a point-and-click rather than interactive fiction. I think I understand where that reviewer is coming from: you lack interactivity/choice during the story bits, and that is compensated by the bar mini-game being, well, point to the bottle and click to serve. Still, I would love to discuss more about this with that reviewer (or anyone really). Is point-and-click IF?

So how did I handle that?

Meh. Again, disappointed. Can't lie about feelings. I thought I had done a better of a job than I did (according to the judging scores). Even looking at the reviews/feedback I had gotten on IFDB/Forum, I thought I had done better. My gut feeling half-way through the voting period was correct, after all (damn it! it always is...).

But having written 95% of this post just before the results dropped was surprisingly cathartic and brought a lot of perspective on the whole experience. It was obvious where my entry lacked and where it shined. At the end, you get a overall mediocre entry (as in of only moderate quality). It made sense for it to end up where it did. Like I said previously, I was over-ambitious, and that really didn't work in my favour, because I didn't have the stuff to back it up.

Sure it was disappointing to see my entry scoring so low/not be a favourite, but weirdly... it didn't last long? I checked the voting pattern, the anonymous feedback, talked with a few peeps, had some some food, a nice hot drink, and went back to business as usual.

Maybe it will hit me later...

Anyway, I'll just finish this part with saying that my family was more mad about the ranking than I was. Not because I didn't do better than I did, but because they couldn't believe other people didn't have the same opinion about the game than they did. Quote from my mom: This is the first time I've liked a game. That's one of my wins right there (that and the stickers we are getting :P).

IV- What's the future for TTTT?

Like I mentioned above, the reviews and interaction I had on Tumblr gave be a bunch of ideas/suggestions for the next step of this game. I don't know the timeline for the intended update or how I will update the game (in one go or in chunks - probably the latter) or how the code may need to change (it definitely will need some sort of overhaul). There is A LOT of work ahead of me.

So now, I have multiple To-Do lists: one created while I was working on TTTT before I submitted it and one after the Comp deadline. The first included ideas I would have while writing or coding and items that I could not include in the game because of time. The second were ideas I would get while getting returns/impressions, suggestions sent/in reviews, and stemming from discussions I've had with players. {Not every comment I've received in the reviews will make me change that particular aspect, but even those gave me ideas.}

Here's a non exhaustive list** of the first one:

Obviously adding the missing NPCs (both the one-timers and recurring ones).

Adding more choices while talking to those NPCs (eg: stopping them from doing something, giving unsolicited advice, etc...) and giving each of them an Ending.

More drinks! {would require a few new bottles and merging the Soda ones together}

Reloop the Restart to the Story Screen as a NewGame+ Function.

Adding Music for the ~ vibes ~

Creating an Achievement list and have more stats trackers.

Creating a Highscore page for the Arcade Mode.

More MC Customisation (as an option to do, it won't have any consequence/effect on the story, just for the lolz of it all).

Redesign the Menu to look more like a Bar Menu (and includes the name/link to the real drink).

Adding a Codex Page for NPC's encountered (maybe an achievement too).

More fluff text!

Adding the missing Events (Stolen Tip Jar/Knock on the sign combo among others)

Maybe try to scale it for mobile (v unlikely with the size of the bar)

And here's the non exhaustive list** of the second one:

Have a more detailed tutorial explaining the combined bottles and where to find/what to find in the Guarnish box.

The Restocking Mini-Game to include penalties (bottle not available until restock/next day), except on Easy Difficulty.

Re-work on the Difficulty Setting: make the Hard Time harder, Recipe not available on Hard (only in the Menu list), Hard Mode could have measurements instead of one click-bottle.

Adding a Setting for a fixed amount of drinks during Frenzy/Rush time.

The bottles in the Bar appear randomly (time/space).

Look into substitution of ingredients {the code would need to change drastically, depending on the recipes might not even be possible...}

Make the Umbrella do something (extra tips?)

Arcade Mode-TIMED: perfect drinks add time to the timer, really bad ones removes time.

Proofread and edit the text (obviously, but no cuts!).

Give a choice to play all 14 days (which will be fixed to 14 days when I introduce the Recurring NPCs)

After finding the Tip Jar, only give one choice: display or hide it, rather than leave the option to change your mind (that confused people)

Have something to do with the coins if you get too much (this started from a bug where the gold wasn't tracked properly)

**It's mainly non-exhaustive because I have a bunch of post-its with ideas and it's not organised yet. If you are reading this and thought of an interesting thing I could add to the game, do shoot me a message! I welcome it all!

V- Some fun tit bits...

Here are some random thing about the game/process that didn't make the cut in the novel above.

95% of the drinks are actual drinks, and as close to the recipe I could get them. I spent hours looking at recipes, and I even made a few while making the game.

Renaud's Nightmare is named after a disgusting concoction mentioned in Exquisite Cadaver (referencing my own work :P).

For a few weeks, I went back and forth between keeping the bar as is (one click on a bottle) or making it more like VA-11-HALL-4 (5 ingredients, different measurements). It was worse when I was fighting my code.

MelS (my writer for TTATEH) helped me name half of the drinks and of the characters (including NPCs not in the game currently). He also had to suffer through my various attempts at making the page look good (his go-to responses: I don't know what looks good or not, it's fine and both versions look good, why do I have to choose? You know this stuff better than me.).

I've been on a Terry Pratchett binge since May-ish, and it inspired the humour of TTTT to be a bit more over the top than I would have probably done otherwise. The Last Continent was one of the reasons I gave the MC an Australian accent.

All bottle ingredients had at least 2 versions: plain colours and the current 3D-looking version with shading and a cap/cork.

There are over 120 assets/images in this game, 3/4 of them being the glasses.

VI- In Conclusion

You've reached the end of this post. Thank you for playing reading! I hope you enjoyed the ride and I hope to see you again when progress on the new version finally starts. Like during the making of TTTT's Comp version, it will be well documented on this blog. In the meantime, you can find the game on itch now!

Thank you to everyone who played my entry, voted for it, left a review or a comment, and interacted with me on this long/short journey!

I don't think I'll participate next year tho... I am exhausted. Well... unless I get a good idea until then... I should try to make a smaller game this time...

#tttt #the thick table tavern #postmortem #ifcomp #ifcomp2022 #game dev #twine #twine game #retrospective #gosh I hope I don't sound whiny in this #I promise I am not bitter

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bonny-kookoo · 4 years ago

Text

Rabbit Boy | JJK x Reader | 🔞

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader

Wordcount: 10.3k (Long)

Genre: Romance, Friends/strangers to lovers, Smut, BDSM because I'm making that a genre now

Tags/Warnings: BDSM themes (please I'm begging you stop reading my shit if it makes you uncumfortable), mentions of restrainment, light shibari, edging, orgasm denial (very mild), Subspace, Domspace because yes thats a thing, Dom/sub dynamics, Biting, Oral (m and f receiving), riding, and not the horseback kind if you know what I mean, protected sex yes, we love an organized household, there's just so much sweet filth istg

Summary: Jungkook is wild, untamed, and doesn't really commit to anyone for long. But maybe, you're his only exception in this world. Maybe, you're really that perfect partner he's been looking for.

Jungkook likes to think of himself as an artist.

Sure, if people knew exactly what the young man does in his freetime (or as a side job, don't judge, we all want to make money out of our hobbies stop lying to yourself), they would surely look at him differently.

But he's an artist, nonetheless.

Technically, Jungkook also doesn't need to do what he does simply for the money. No, his main job pays very well- considering that he's one of the top elite in his genre of games. He doesn't just merely play and win a game; Jungkook, just like most things he touches, claims complete ownership of the match he's fighting. It's a well known fact that he's someone who likes things for himself. He loves control, craves to lead, and hates to be belittled.

Oh and yeah- financially, investing in an indie-game three years back had also done his bank account some good.

Now, at an age where he can be fully considered a man, and not a boy anymore, he craves control in different aspects of life- and love.

Jungkook has a problem however.

He's wild.

Not in the way one might think he is (although several people could argue that yes, that's also the case in bed..) but generally. He loves to control- but he hates to be tied down.

And a mindset like that doesn't work well with relationships.

He's had them before, don't get him wrong. He's had numerous in the past, but they all either broke apart because he would hold that particular desire back, making him antsy and moody, or he would welcome his partners into his world, and become uncomfortable with the way things would progress.

No, he doesn't want to experiment. He knows exactly what he wants, and if that means he's 'close-minded' and a bad person, then so be it for him.

He never liked the constant company in his apartment anyways.

"Ah, I've seen her before. She's usually a regular for Yoongi though." Taehyung says, checking a name for Jungkook, who's doodling on a napkin while he waits for his new appointment to show up. "I see. I forgot that Yoongi took some days off recently- that's probably why she's now under your hand." He explains, and Jungkook huffs, his blonde hair tickling his cheek.

"So I'll have to adjust? I mean, Yoongi's style is pretty different from mine." The young man says, not looking up. He simply continues his little sketch of braided hair, while the lanky guy behind the counter clicks away on his laptop.

"Probably? I can't check the logs since they're private, but from what I know Yoongi only did the usual with her." he explains, shrugging as he looks at his friend and colleague. "I can re-schedule her to Hoseok if you want?" He asks, and Jungkook, after finishing his drawing, lets the pen fall and stretches.

"Yeah, that would probably be best. Wouldn't know what to do if she drops- rather not have him rip my head off, thanks." He says, before he gets up.

"Ah- you're still coming over tonight right? Y/N said she's gonna cook for us." He says, and Jungkooks body shivers a little.

Your name is nothing new to him, but the reaction to it most certainly was. You're a friend of Yoongi and Hoseok, having joined in on their gaming nights a few months ago after Yoongi had insisted you couldn't stay alone on a christmas day. Jungkook had never really asked why you were alone in the first place, but he had never really cared much for it either. Sure, you were an absolute gem to look at; technically absolutely his type, but he had early on decided not to pursue anything at all with you. He knew friendship wouldn't stay friendship with you, his own hunger way too large to simply be satiated by platonic gestures-

and he was also sure you wouldn't be able to handle him, truly. The conversation with Jimin, one of your best friends, had changed nothing about that. Because he didn't know you well enough to quite know if you were only bark and no bite- or if you were genuinely craving the same things he did.

But most recently, there had been a change in his opinion on you. Because he had seen you, come out of this place, out of Yoongis studio.

You knew about all of this- and you were still around.

Nothing had changed.

Now, of course he had instantly poked holes into the poor guy about if he had ever played with you before- and the answer he had gotten, had made him even more interested and antsy to get closer to you.

Because while you trusted Yoongi with everything you had, he had never done anything with you. You had simply been interested in watching a scene unfold- and had told him that you were definitely interested in participating. The reason Jungkook couldn't ask you directly was a clear one-

You were majorly intimidated by him, to the point of, he had never really had a proper conversation with you. Partially, he had to admit, because he himself didn't want to involve himself too much with you.

He’d always asked himself; wouldn’t you be even more distant and reserved with him if you knew this side of him? Sure, you always joked around that he probably tied his girls up and edged them until they cried- but did you know that he genuinely enjoyed these things?

Relationships for him were mere covers to call the arrangements he had with the girls that came and went in his life in a constant changing matter. Deep down, no one night stand could satisfy his most carnal desires, and he was very well aware of that. But he rather took what he could get and lived a fever dream for a few moments than stay on his own simply because his idea of pleasure and sex was not the norm.

No, he refused to deny himself that.

Maybe it was because he’d always lived a rather lavish life- with his parents well off and his own career skyrocketing he never really had any worries like you have had in the past. For some odd reason, while looking at the soft red rope in his hands, his thoughts suddenly went astray; he knew he could give you the stability you oh so craved, in every way shape and form. You were a diamond simply waiting to be perfected- you had so much potential, knowing that you were secretly wandering around the same paths as he did made him even more frustrated.

The hints were there, they were obvious; from the way you had sighed out in bliss when he’d teasingly pulled your hair just hours ago, to the sinful confessions he’d heard that night when he overheard you and jimin by accident. Of course he’d maybe wasted a thought or two of you underneath him to humor him once or twice- but now with the rope in his hands, his mind immediately began painting pictures of it against your skin. Would you enjoy it? And what if he took your sight, or only bound your hands? What if he denied you to cum, or if he took you from behind, grabbing your hair and pushing down your spine to make it arch so prettily- never with the intend to hurt, of course. He knew he’d have to tame you first, make you submit, but then again, he loved the challenge.

You made even the idea of touching fun.

He wouldn't even have to undress you to fully get himself worked up, he was sure of that. Only seeing you bow to his very command would be enough to satisfy him. Of course, over the course of time he would lead you deeper and deeper into his rabbit hole, but he would take it slow for you.

So, with a smile, and a wave of his hand, he walked past the girl he knew had been his appointment- grinning at Taehyung. "Of course I'll be there."

He wouldn't dare miss a night with you.

You were stressing. A little.

Maybe.

Maybe a lot.

Everything would've been fine if they guys would've all come over. But due to the bad weather, and Taehyungs bad habit of never properly fixing his god-forsaken dumpster of a car, only one of them would be able to make it. And of course the one had to be Jeon Jungkook.

Just great.

Now, it wasn't like you didn't like the guy, no way. The problem was more, that he was on the exact opposite of that spectrum. You had a major crush on him, which felt like the plot to a really bad drama show you would watch drunk at night- and in a way, it really felt like one too. Because you were pretty sure, he didn't even know your name.

But oh well- apparently he knew more than that. More specifically, your phone number. And it had scared the shit out of you at first to receive a message from him because how the hell did he get your number, but then again you remembered that one of your connections was Kim Taehyung- and everyone knew what he knew.

It was the doorbell that ripped you out of your skin almost.

You didn't even change, deciding any effort would be too late anyways; and you were still heavily confused in the first place why the fuck he would come over alone, even though you two had never exchanged much more than a friendly hello and goodbye. But there he was, as you opened the door- soft, white hoodie and ripped jeans, a bit damp from the rain outside as you let him inside.

He didn't move.

"Uh-" You started, but he just looked at you, friendly as ever, although a teasing glint in his eye made you frown a bit.

He thought it was cute.

"You didn't tell me to come in." He said, and you blinked once, twice, before your brain had properly restarted.

"Oh uh- come in?" You said, again, moving a bit to the side so he could walk in- which he still didn't. "Jungkook come on now its fucking cold-!" You whined, and he laughed, finally stepping inside. Had he always been like that? Could very well be the case, after all, you had never truly paid much attention to his behavior before.

"Thanks for letting me come over." He said, and you watched him as he untied his boots. "I had nothing else to do- and also, I didn't want you to waste any food, considering Tae said you cooked for us." He explained, before he got up again from his half kneeling position, boots now standing next to your significantly smaller shoes.

"Ah, it would've been fine, you guys don't have to feel bad." You waved off, smiling. "I was about to stop cooking anyways when Jimin had texted me, but well, then you did and uhm.." You drifted off, noticing how you were suddenly waiting for him to lead the way.

In your own apartment.

What the hell?

If he noticed however, he didn't show it. He simply smiled, and moved his hands inside the front pocket of his hoodie. "Ah, thanks. I appreciate it, really." He said, and you smiled at him as well, walking towards the main area of your apartment. It was small, very small compared to his own, but he enjoyed the feeling of it. Everything around him reminded him of you, in a way; from the pictures taped to the walls, to the stickers on your fridge. It all held a piece of you in it. "Your apartment is really nice, by the way." He commented, and you turned around, before getting plates and cutlery to bring inside the living room.

"Ah, right, it's your first time here." You said. "Thanks- the living room is right around the corner there, you can just sit down and I'll bring everything there." You explained, and he smiled, nodding without arguing.

You liked that.

Typically, there would've been this awkward 'oh no let me help you', but Jungkook didn't seem to dwell on it much, letting you do your thing instead of butting in and making things weird. He simply walked where you had directed him, sitting down on the couch as he went to place a blanket to the side. His fingers moved over the fabric for a moment, noticing how everything on the couch, including the pillows, were made of that same, soft material.

Interesting.

"Oh- you can just put that to the side, sorry I forgot to clean that up." You said, putting the food onto the table as he just smiles again. He waits for you to sit down as well before you turn up the TV volume a little, nerves finally setting in as you notice there's almost nothing you can talk to him about. "This is awkward." You comment, and he chuckles at that swallowing his bite as he looks at you.

"Doesn't have to be." He states, before he turns his body a bit more into your direction; a visible sign that he wants a conversation. "Tae has never mentioned what you do for a living." He states, an unasked question of his. He lets you decide if you want to take it as one or leave it as a statement- it makes you feel nice, in a way.

"Ah uh.. it's really boring, so I guess I never really talk about it either.." You say, and he tilts his head a little, a silent urging for you to continue. You feel insignificant next o him and his job however. He's superior to you in any way, and you don't want him to feel pity or laugh at you for your job. "I uh.. I'm a programmer for a.. pretty unknown game studio." You say, body almost shrinking in on itself as you wait for his reaction. Much to your surprise however, he makes a sound that's purely surprise, as he swallows his bite with a bit of urgency.

"Fuck really?! That's so cool though!" He argues, brows furrowed a bit as he playfully accuses you with his next words. "Indie or not, a programmer is the main force of any game. Did you work on any games I might know of?" He asks, eyes sparkling as he realizes he had finally found something to bond with you over.

"Uh.. 'Rabbit Boy' was our best hit until now.." You say, still a bit shy, but you're also a tad more confident now. His reaction is either well-staged, or he's genuinely interested in what you do.

"I played it I think. It was a bit short, but I loved the mechanics." He says, and before he can quite stop himself, his hand has already reached out to you, running over your hair as he praises you like second nature. "Wuah, so smart!" He says, before he gets a reaction he wouldn't have thought he'd get from shy-you.

Because you playfully shove him, your socked feet pushed against the side of his thigh as you giggle at him.

Interesting, again.

Now, Jimin has actually told him about this before. How you were anything but the shy girl when you were around people you knew and trusted. He had believed it- to an extend- because he had also thought that maybe you were like that to prove your spot between those guys. As the only girl, you easily got thrown under the bus, so you had to somehow own your spot in the midst of your circle of friends.

However, it seemed like you were truly just a brat, hiding behind that innocent facade of yours. A barking dog, with every intent to bite if needed.

And Jungkook knew, he'd love to tame you, show you your spot, and make you his prey.

The trashy movie your watching bores you, in a way. Jungkook has noticed this already, having taken note of your feet wiggling around, your teeth nibbling on the inside of your cheek, as you rest your cheek on your hand, elbow resting on the side of the couch.

“I don’t know why she’s so hesitant.” You mutter, pouting as you slump into the couch- uncaring that the side of your body now leans against his own. He feels your warmth- and for some reason it brings him comfort to notice that you’re seemingly growing more at ease. “I mean, it’s what she’s into, right?” You say, brows furrowed as you watch the screen.

“It’s not that simple.” Jungkook explains, trying to not make it obvious that he’s not necessarily talking about the movie. “Some men like to you know.. fight for a partner. Impress them. Win them over.” He explains, and he can feel you shift a little- until your head raises a bit, watching him as he watches you; gazes locked, and you can’t look away. You’re shy, you’re growing restless, but his eyes are like magnets; there’s no way you can avert your gaze.

“And.. you?” You ask, voice not loud at all, as if you don’t even notice you’re saying it. He loves that- loves the fact that you’re slowly letting him closer- not only physically.

“I like to earn my spot in their lives.” He states, and your mind suddenly begins to spin. You’ve always seen him as someone who doesn’t care much about emotions or feelings, or relationships for that matter. And maybe he doesn’t- maybe he just says this because he knows your weak spots. But the way his words fall into your ears makes you believe him. “I like to see my partner thrive; I love to see them grow. And..” he says, boldly deciding to slowly reach out his hand that was placed on the back of the couch- his fingers running through your hair, only brushing through, never pulling (no matter how much you’re craving it secretly). “I love to see them let go.” He humms out, and there’s a sudden shiver down your back, one that he definitely notices.

This is it. This is where you’ll let him touch you, let him wreck you, let him ruin you. You lean in closer, and so does he, but just when your lips are about to touch, he smiles gently- a warm affectionate gesture that you’ve never seen from him. And with it being directed at you, it’s even more meaningful- but it’s all about his next move, the way his inked fingers trace your cheek, before he speaks.

“You’re not ready yet.”

And with that, he turns back to the TV.

You huff, and it's the first time you know exactly what you're doing. You knew from Yoongi what Jungkook did in his freetime- you knew that this stuff was his expertise. Defeated, you looked down towards your knees, as your thoughts start to grow more and more frustrated. He probably didn't even see you like that, having only visited you out of pity, and not because he wanted to see you.

You were probably already friendzoned, and he was too nice to outright say it into your face. It made your emotions turn sour as the situation grew more and more awkward for you.

"What're you thinking about?" He asks, and you don't answer. What was there to say anyways? You really didn't want to have this weird conversation where he would tell you that oh yeah you're a nice girl, but he's not the right guy, the usual stuff you've already heard time and time again. "Y/N." He says, his voice dropping a little, but you only chew on the inside of your cheek again, eyes moving towards the TV screen. You didn't want to talk- you just hoped he would now sigh and get up, leaving so you could forget about all of this. You could maybe fake being sick for the next week or so to avoid him, yeah, that would be enough time to gloss over this entire situation. But he only clicks his tongue, hands suddenly moving your legs as he moves your body to face him.

Looking at his face is your first mistake.

His eyes are dark and almost angry, irritated as he looks as you. His jaw is clenched, and his hands stay on your knees for a moment, before he's sure enough that he has your attention. Only then does he speak, his voice nowhere near as soft and light as it had been before. "I know what you're thinking, and I don't like it." He says, and that's when you make your second mistake.

"Can we not right now? You don't know shit." You say, and he stares you down for a moment, until his head tilts a slight bit, eyes growing predatory as the corners of his lips tilt upwards. It resembles a small smile, yes, but it's not meant to be one. No, the first thing you have to think about is a wolf snarling at you, ready to put his packmate into their place for acting out.

It makes your spine tingle.

"Hm, maybe, but we can be classy about it, no?" He asks, and you scoff, trying to move your legs away from him, as he scans you.

At this point, he can see clearly that you're testing him.

So he gets up promptly, moving you around so you're standing in front of him. His inked hand finds your hair, gripping without mercy as he pulls your head back, your gaze now forced to stay on his as he calmly speaks. "You think I'm not into you like that- and you're as wrong as you could ever get." He says, biting his tongue as to not let a petname slip. He'd love to use them, but he knows that it's not yet time. That would be foul play, in a way; he doesn't want to seduce you.

He wants to make you understand.

"Trust me when I say I'd love to just throw you over my legs to spank that attitude out of you right now." He explains, and you whine- not in pain, but simply as a reaction to his confession. "But you don't know what you're getting yourself into." He continues, and pulls a bit to interrupt your next words. You know that you can get free any second you want to- but for some reason, there's no urge to do so. "You think of this as some game to play, you think of yourself as someone who can take all of it at once, but you don't even get the simplest and most important things about this entire thing." You swallow, as you stay still, finally giving up your fight as he relaxes the grip he still has on you. "Even now, it's not me controlling this situation. Its you." He says, letting go of you as his hands rest on your cheeks, eyes searching for any clues of discomfort. Only when he finds none, does he continue. "I will only ever have as much control over you as you're willing to give to me." He smiles again, this time, warm and comforting. "If you're really willing to do this, we will do this right. You'll have to trust me first, and I'll have to get to know you fully first, before anything else happens. Understood?" He asks.

And you nod.

"Do you know what you just agreed to?" He chuckles, and, shyly, you shake your head.

"See?" He grins, breaking skincontact with you. "You're not ready yet."

His brows furrow when he sees you sitting on the counter, Taehyung talking to you. "What're you doing here?" He asks, and you pout, as Taehyung moves away, not wanting to get involved into anything this time. "Stop that face. We talked about this last week, why're you here now?" He asks, and you tilt your head innocently.

"Maybe I'm here for Yoongi?" You say, and his eyes grow darker for a second, before he composes himself.

"Good try, but he's still off work." He states, and you deflate a bit.

"I just.. wanted to see, I guess." You say, and he smiles a bit impishly.

"Oh? I mean, I have a scene in twenty minutes.." He asks, and internally, you cringe. No, you don't want to see him screw or even touch another woman in the ways you secretly want him to touch you instead. No, you're technically here to maybe talk him into show you at least a little bit. But it doesn't seem like he'll cave in anytime soon, so you sigh out.

"Okay, okay, I'll see you around, I guess." You say, hopping down from the counter before you take a step towards the exit.

"Ah well, I'll drive you home then." He states, and you grow confused as he leans against the counter. "Seeing as my scheduled appointment wants to leave, I have time off." He states, and you skin tingles. "Come on now, before I change my mind." He states, as he walks you outside again, leading you towards his car.

"I didn't mean to turn up so.. I don't know. Sorry." You said, and he gets into the drivers seat, shaking his head.

"I can understand you, trust me." He says, as he starts the engine and drives off. "If you're okay with it, I'd like to get something from my apartment, and then drive to yours." He says, and you tilt your head.

"Why not to the studio, or your place?" You ask, and he nods.

"While those are places I feel comfortable, they're unfamiliar to you. It's best if we start in a place that's comforting and gives you a sense of security." He states, and you nod.

Jungkook, in your eyes, never really seemed as mature as he's acting in those moments. It's as if he switches every time you two change topics; any time this particular one comes up, his mood changing into a serious one. Now, you're not stupid, you know the risks- and of course you had somewhat done your research online about the damages that could occur during all of this. And there's also the not too little chance it really isn't something for you after all- and in a way, that scares you. Because you want jungkook, but what if you don't want.. this?

Instead of voicing that out, you simply keep quiet as he gets out the car, and inside again after fetching what looks like an overnight bag. "You're staying over?" You ask, and he simply throws it on to the backseat.

"Maybe. We'll see." He says, and you don't question him as he drives. "Let's get something to eat. What're you craving?" He asks, as he keeps his attention on the road. He notices how you seem to think, already able to practically see the gears turning inside your head. "Don't think about what I could want. I asked what you want." He says, calmly, and so soft, that you simply let your words out.

"Tae usually get's me food.." You start, and Jungkook nods, as if understanding. You watch him smile a little.

"Let's get some junk food and eat it in the car." He simply states, and you nod, happy that he seemingly really did get what you were trying to say. For you, things like these were almost like rituals- like you and tae getting random icecream just to hurry home every time to not have it melt.

Maybe this would become a memory only for you and Jungkook.

"You're nervous." Jungkook says, speaking out what's obvious. You don't know what he'll do, you're confused whats in his bag- you're nervous, just like he said. "Why is that?" He asks, casually sitting on your bed with you. He had earlier told you not to panic-clean it; he was not there to be impressed. He was simply a visitor for now, nothing more, nothing less. You shrugged. There were a lot of reasons you were nervous. "If you want this to work, I need to have proper communication with you. Guessing will get me nowhere." He says, but his voice is not upset. He's simply informing you.

"I.. don't know what you'll do?" You say, and He smiles, sitting more comfortably, as he shows you his open hands.

"I'm not gonna do anything for the moment." He tells you, and you shrug.

"But wasn't that the plan?" You ask him.

"What would you want me to do then?" He asks instead, not answering your question. He's testing you, he want's to know if you really are aware of everything. He's also not only asking you about what you want him to do to you- but with you, as well. He was unsure if you wanted to romantically involve yourself with him, or simply explore something new at his side.

He's afraid he'd be okay with either, just because its you.

"Are you going to tie me up?" You ask, and Jungkook grins, before he laughs. You're growing shy, unsure, and he instantly makes sure you know he's simply laughing about what you said, not about you. His hand holds yours- and it's weirdly reassuring.

"No, although I can imagine you looking very pretty in that position." He says. "No, come here." He says, lays down on the bed, and you stay where you are, with reasonable distance between you two. "I want you to come as close to me as you feel comfortable. Don't force it- take your time. I'm not expecting anything, please remember that." He tells you calmly, not looking at you to give you mental distance from him as well. His eyes are actually closed, his body relaxed.

You don't move for a moment. You want to test how long he can really play this patient role- but after around five or ten minutes, he's still not moving. He's not even saying anything, and you're unsure if he's asleep or not.

There's only one way to find out.

You carefully lay down a little away from him, on your side, simply looking at him. It's weird to see him like that; you've always imagined him to be a very dominant and demanding person, from what you've heard and seen of him. But Jungkook doesn't feel like any of the guys you've been with; he also doesn't feel like Taehyung, or Yoongi, or Hoseok.. Jungkook, weirdly enough, feels comfortable. He's relaxed, and laid back, and still has that slight glint of power over you.

You move closer, your curiosity getting the best of you as scenes and pictures of him holding you fill your head. Is he even a cuddler? You can't imagine him being all soft and sweet for gestures like that, but then again, you didn't really think you'd ever be in a situation like this either. Maybe you were judging a book by its cover.

He smells nice- that's one of the first things you notice once you get closer. One of his arms is stretched out to the side- his tattooes visible, but partially hidden by his sweater sleeve. You want to look at them, so you test the waters- by touching his arm, just a small poke with your finger. You can see the corners of his lips twitch; he's definitely awake. You move his arm a little, inside facing you as you get a detailed look at his artworks. They're detailed, they fit him, the dark Ink a stark contrast to his skin.

His sweater seems soft.

You slowly lay down again, your head resting on his biceps as you simply lay for a moment.

This is nice.

You feel more and more bold with every minute that passes, not even minding the way he sometimes moves around. You're growing at ease, so much so, that you simply throw all hesitation out of the window, and cuddle up to him. one of your hands is on his chest, while your head rests ontop of the inside of his shoulder.

This is really nice.

"Are you falling asleep?" He asks, voice not loud at all, as his arm moves, palm resting on your forearm as he holds you. You don't mind it- you feel relaxed enough to really actually do fall asleep- so you nod. "That's good." He tells you.

"But didn't you bring stuff to try?" you ask, and Jungkook nods.

"We got time. A small nap is always a good idea." He tells you, and you simply nod- making him smile.

He's glad.

Because by falling asleep on him like that, you don't even know how much you've complimented him at all. You're relaxed enough around him, comfortable enough to let him close to you in a vulnerable state such as sleep. It makes him wonder how far you'd let him go- would you let anyone get so close so quickly? A sudden rush of protectiveness curses through his body, fills him up, as he swears he can't let you go now. No, what if someone else gets you like this? What if someone takes advantage of your open mind like that? He doesn't even want to imagine.

Jungkook really has it bad.

You slowly wake up to a bit of weight on your face. "jungkook what're you doing?" you giggle, and he chuckles as well as he takes the hand away from over your eyes. He looks well rested, with his eyes still not fully open.

"Nothing." He says. "Just teasing." He says, but of course, nothing he does is just random teasing. Everything he does is calculated- it's to test you, to study you, to make sure he gets to know you. "Are you hungry?" He asks instead.

"Not for food."

He has to let that process for a moment, until he laughs. He's really got it with you, he thinks, as he suddenly moves, eyes dark, while he's now ontop of you, his hands holding your wrists. Expecting you to look surprised, he finds none of that however. It intrigues him, the way you don't seem to be nervous or fearful at all. It makes him wonder what you'd really do to him if he was to advance in ways he wanted to. "Careful, sweetheart." He says, and your eyes sparkle with a silent challenge.

"Or what?"

His grip gets a bit tighter at that, eyes a bit darker. "Someone's eager." He says lowly. "Don't you think you're biting off more than you can chew right now?" He asks, before he clicks his tongue, slowly falling into his own headspace. He knows however not to let himself slip. "Give me a random word." He asks, demands, and you say whatever finds your mind in that moment.

"Bunny." You say.

He raises his eyebrow for a second, but doesn't question it. "I want you to say that, loud and clear, as soon as you feel uncomfortable." He lectures you seriously. "It doesn't matter what it is. Physically, or mentally, or if you simply don't want me to continue because. I need you to tell me that you will say it." His gaze is intense, and you nod. "I promise you; I'll never get mad, or upset, or angry, or disappointed with you. My ego isn't worth your safety." He humms out at the end, and your eyes soften.

He notices it instantly, and it affects him more than he'd like to admit.

"I promise I'll say it if I need to." You tell him, and he grows comfortable again.

"Can I touch you?" He asks, softly, and you nod, before verbally answering him with a yes. "Remember; I'll only ever have as much power and control over you as you will give me." He mumbles, head now dipped down to ghost his lips over the skin of your neck. "But once you give it to me-" He says, his knee situating itself in between your legs to spread them in a silent command. "-I won't give it back." He growls, before he bites down, releasing the skin after hearing your delicate mewl, kissing the spot as if to apologize.

He's not sorry.

"Let me ask you.." He says, feeling you rut against his leg that's pressed against your center. "what do you really want from me?" He asks, and you open your eyes, movements slowly coming to a halt as you notice the way he looks at you.

He almost looks uncertain.

"I.." You want him. You know that- you want all of his bad habits and weird quirks. You want to get to know him and everything that comes with it. Hell, he was the main reason you even got into the entire scene in the first place. "You." You say, deciding its best to practice honesty.

"Me?" He asks, genuinely a little confused.

You nod. "Yeah. You." You say. It's a little weird, the whole situation, but you don't mind it. Your hands slowly slip out of his grasp, before they instead intertwine their fingers with his. He feels weirdly caught off guard by the gesture- his past encounters and relationships never having included things like these. So much so, that Jungkook genuinely believed those things to be simple movie-gestures. Overdone, and not realistic. "Like uhm.. if you want to. If you just want to, you know, I.. guess I'd be okay with that too-" You say, looking away, as Jungkook answers.

"I want you too." He answers, eyes searching yours for any glimmer of dishonesty. But he doesn't find it- there is none. There's just you. "I really want you too." He murmurs out, getting closer, before he lets himself loose, his lips finding yours.

He's never been a fan of kissing, but he can very much already imagine kissing you for hours.

Its not just you letting go in that moment, its him too.

Because unbeknownst to you, he's not just opening you a door to his world of unspoken fantasies-

He's also opening his heart as well.

Your first time together is slow and comfortable.

It happens just a day after you had both decided to pursue an actual relationship with one another. He's gentle, careful, but not hesitant. He's exploring.

Inside of his head, he notes down every noise and every twitch of muscle. You sigh as he eats you out, the small ponytail of his unable to hold onto all of his hair as his eyes are partially hidden behind the blonde strands. He's watching you, his fingers having already stretched you out, but then he sits up. You whine, with him having stolen your release for a second time. "Let's play a little, yeah?" He says with an amused yet calm tone. You're already unable to do much about your position; your wrists bound to your bed over your head, carefully tied knots comfortable against your skin, as long as you don't pull. "Legs open." He calls out as you try and close them, and you whine again; testing his patience as you still go ahead and disobey his command. He watches, moves forward, before he pulls them apart again. "You want to cum, no?" He asks, and you nod, frustratedly so. "I wonder what made you think you've earned that reward from me." He tells you, eyes scanning your form as you pull on your restraints a little. He's not fully into his own headspace yet- he's still very much on high alert to notice any signs of discomfort coming from you.

He has to learn just as much as you do.

"You're lucky you're so sweet." He says, before he crawls closer again, his hand on your center, as he enters you with two fingers. Its not enough, but then his thumb draws circles on your clit- and you're approaching, quickly. "Hm? Won't you cum?" And then you say it.

"Can I?"

It's so desperate, so needy, so submissive, that it sends a chill down his spine. He moves closer, kisses your neck, as he can't help but let the rush of it get to him. He is, after all, just as desperate for release. No matter if its his, or yours.

"Such a good girl, of course you can." He tells you. "What a sweet one, such good manners.." He teases playfully, and you tug at your restraints as you come undone under his hands. He unties your wrists and you're holding onto him as soon as you're free, and he lets you hold onto him in your post orgasmic bliss.

Its after a moment that you realize it.

"Wait-" You say, sitting up to look at him. "You- I mean, you didn't get to-" You start, but Jungkook waves it off.

"Its fine, really." He tells you, and you know he's serious. "I'll just wait until it goes down, or take care of it in your bathroom if thats okay with you." He says, patting the side next to him to lay down on. "Come here." He asks, and you comply, before you speak again.

"You.." You start, not looking at him. "Could just take care of it here." You say. "Or I could.." you start, and he looks at you.

"Do you want that, or do you only feel like you have to?" He asks, and you shrug. You take some time, before you answer.

You've seen most of Jungkook until now. From his strong arms, his back, his inked skin, to his thighs and legs. You have seen all- but that. And you've never really considered giving anything back in that way to anyone because of one single embarrassing moment- but with Jungkook, for some reason, you wanted to try.

"I want to." You say, and he nods. "But I don't know how.." You say, and he smiles reassuringly.

"I'll guide you." He tells you, before he scans your face. He's never really felt that desired- at least not in the way he does in that moment with you. "You can take it out for starters." He says, and you nod, before you hesitate a little.

Jungkook is nice, when it comes to that. He's patient, always lets you do the pacing for now, until you trust him enough. This is only the start, after all. You stay cuddled up to his side, but your hand ventures towards his sweats, where you can see his prominent erection still waiting. Slowly, you push the fabric down, both his sweats and boxers underneath- his hips lifting a bit to make it easier for you, until he's freed from his clothes.

You've never really thought much about looks when it came to that department, but Jungkook was, in each and every way, highly attractive. Now you knew, that there was literally nothing about him you didn't desire.

Your first touches are a little hesitant, testing the waters, and Jungkook tries not to react too much to it to give you time. Its when you start to move your hand however, that he closes his eyes, head now completely resting on the pillows beneath as he just decides to enjoy what you might give him. His hips twitch upwards a little after you'd run your thumb over the head, precum glistening while your hand uses it as lubricant to move more smoothly.

He sighs out.

And you grow bold at that, moving to sit up and escape out of his embrace, before you dip down to feed your curiosity. As your tongue touches his skin, his muscles contract, the action not expected since he didn't look what you were doing. You've been told once before that you're not.. the best at this- but Jungkook made you want to try. If you would've looked, you would've spotted the intense stare that Jungkook had been sending your way; mesmerized by the way you tucked your hair behind your ear oh so sweetly, before you let a drop of saliva escape from between your lips, taking him in soon after it had dropped onto his awaiting length.

You really were something else.

He'd gotten head time and time before, and it was never something he didn't like- but he'd also rarely ever cared that much emotionally about the person giving it to him. It's weird, how an emotional connection can make you so much more sensitive to things- such as in that moment, as your tongue moved over his skin while inside your warm mouth, lips heavenly on his cock.

He couldn't imagine what it would be like to be inside you.

There's nothing he could teach you, nothing he could tell you to do, as you moved, sucked and licked. He was breathing heavily already, his hand finding yours as you hold onto it. He sits up, can't help it, has to somehow touch you while you're not letting go of your task. His palm escapes your hand, rests on your head instead, runs through your hair before it grips a little. You moan, vibrations making him throw his head back as he groans out, feeling his end coming closer. "If you don't want to swallow, let go." He grits out, but you suck harder instead, and its when your hand finds his balls that he lets himself fall back onto the mattress beneath, shooting his load into your mouth as you swallow it down.

He's on cloud nine.

You're thoughtful enough to pull his underwear and pants back up, laying on your stomach next to him, waiting, watching, with impish eyes. He looks so radiant, so relaxed, so at ease. It fills you with a weird sense of pride; since in a way, its your doing. "Why did you tell me you don't know how to do that." He comments, rather than asks, slowly calming his breathing back down. His eyes open, hand pushing some hair out of your face. "Thank you. That was amazing." He says, and you shrug.

"Thanks for the compliment." You say, looking at him.

"I have a request." He says, and you nod. "Not like that." He teases, making you blush. "No, but seriously." Jungkook knows that you've been with other people before. It scares him to know that some of your experiences might not have been good- he knows some absolute horror stories Taehyung had told him. "I want you to take all that you've experienced with your former partners.. all those moments, emotions, bad memories, all of it." He tells you, hand now resting on your cheek- a gesture in which you lean into. "And throw them away. Forget them." He tells you.

"This is a new start, for both of us."

"How many clients have you been with?" You ask, casually sitting on the kitchen counter as Jungkook washes the dishes. Its your first night in his apartment, and you're more comfortable than you thought you'd be.

"None." He tells you, and you're ready to snort out a laugh, but he doesn't look at all like he's joking. Seeing your confusion, he continues while scrubbing a plate. "None of us actually have sex with our clients. Some only come to talk, really- others come to let go." He explains, and you nod. "I've never touched, nor been with someone intimately during a scene." He tells you.

"So you had scenes with your partners then?" You ask, and he shrugs.

"In the beginning, yeah." He admits, shrugging. "But I eventually gave up on it. It's not something a lot of people find very appealing. It all looks great in theory, but when practiced, most find its not for them." Draining the sink, he dries his hands on the dish towel, before putting it in its proper place.

"Could you.. imagine a relationship without it?" You ask, and he sighs, shaking his head.

"Not really." He looks at you after a moment. "Its who I am, and its how I love. I can't change that." He tells you, and you nod. Its understandable really, and you like that he has clear lines he likes to follow. It's weirdly comforting to know that he has his life so under control- its all you've ever wanted really.

It's something Jungkook might be able to give you.

It was weird, the feeling of the rope against your skin. He’d been right about it earlier; it wasn’t rough or itchy at all. But maybe that was just because it was him doing it. Maybe he was simply fogging up your senses.

It would make sense.

“Okay?” He humms out, voice gentle and calm while he stops his hands for a moment, palm on your shoulder where it warms up your skin. You’re unsure what okay really means- okay like, he’s finished? Or is he asking if you’re okay? Or is he asking for permission? “Speak to me- don’t just think.” He says, eyes watching you in such a manner that made your slightly trembling body calm down.

“I’m not sure what- what you mean by, okay.” You say, and he smiles, eyes roaming over your body for a moment, but surprisingly not in a way that would make you feel exposed. You’re almost naked, after all- only your most private parts hidden from his sight. You can see the very evident tent in his pants; but he doesn’t seem like he’s frustrated or fazed about it.

“Good Job telling me.” He says first and foremost, and you start to feel warm inside. “I was asking if you were okay. Do you remember your colors?” He asks, and you nod, before verbally answering him with a ‘yes’. He nods again, a hand running over your head, fingers running through your hair affectionately. “Good. I’ll finish the last knots now- remember you can stop at any time. Don’t hesitate.” He says, and you nod.

He grabs the rope again; the tiny fact that he’d chosen one in your favorite color making you feel.. well, you didn’t know. You could feel your nose sting, before it shot into your eyes, making them water; something that Jungkook immediately noticed. “Color?” He asks, and you shake your head.

“Green, Green, I’m okay-“ you say, but you can’t stop the tears. He’s quick to sit down in front of you after tying the last knot- and it’s the first time you quietly look at them. They’re so delicate, so well done, but there’s no time to dwell on it as he lifts you chin gently.

“Talk to me.” He says, hands on your shoulders to give you some sense of stability. You’re safe, you don’t feel bad, but just..

“I don’t know. There’s so much-“ you begin, and he softly smiles, as if you’re not currently completely bound with no chance of proper movement. You take a deep breath, holding it before you release again, silently following the advices he’d given you prior. “Why do I feel so.. comfortable? I feel safe even though I’m in such a dangerous situation- I’m.. this is weird isn’t it, I should be.. I don’t know. Why’re you not doing anything? Wasn’t this supposed to be like, a sex session or something I don’t get it-“ you babble, and he lets you, before he speaks.

“You still don’t quite get it, do you?” He asks, and your glistening eyes stare up at him. “I don’t need something as simple as sex to feel satisfied.” He explains, and you nod, even though you don't quite understand. "I feel euphoric right now, even though you probably won't quite believe me." He says, his smile evident as his fingers trace the knots on your skin. It's there that you see it; the glimmer in his eyes, something you've never seen before with someone else. "The fact that you let me do this, it's all I need." He humms out. He looks at you, a silent question, and you take a deep breath.

You don't quite know what you're doing. Its weird- but seeing him like that makes you feel weightless. It happens slowly, you don't quite grasp what it is, but the feeling is nice. It's like letting go- like standing on the highest platform of the universe and just jumping down. And when you open your eyes, all you see is him.

He can't take his eyes off of you.

He's seen it often enough to spot it, knows what it looks like, but it still holds such a deep meaning to him to see you fall into your subspace for the very first time. You're so beautiful like that, so ethereal and enchanting as you lean forward to get closer to him. He's careful you dont accidentally hurt yourself with the big scissors on the bed close by- emergency equipment to release you asap if needed.

He knows escape is the furthest thing on your mind right now.

Able to do anything he'd want with you, he's not like that however. He's responsible enough to let you float for a moment, before he speaks to you again. "Baby?" He asks, and you nod, nuzzling his shoulder as he holds you close. "You're doing so good. Can you do something for me baby?" He questions again, and you nod, not parting from him however before he talks again. "Can you sit straight for a moment? Just like that, good girl." He praises as you instantly follow his command. "I got you, okay? I got you, you're safe." He repeats, as he slowly unties your body. It's careful reassuring and slow movements that make it possible to untie you- too quickly could make you drop; a state of sudden shift in mental state, that could send you straight into distress. Jungkook doesn't ever want to be the cause of that for you.

You're underneath him, and he's careful, as he undresses after placing the scissors onto the bedside table where it cant lead to any accidents. He also reaches inside the table, pulling out a condom from a box safely stored, before he gets himself ready.

Not even for a second is his attention not on you however.

"Hands up baby." He commands, and you do as he wants, already squirming as he advances towards you, fingers stretching you out as you grow huffy at the prospect of being edged again. He's quick to catch on though. "Hm, I'm not gonna be mean baby." He tells your fuzzy mind. "But I gotta get you ready, no?" Fingers steadily helping you relax, he waits until he deems you ready.

You struggle to keep your hands up as he enters you, but your mind is adamant on keeping his command. He groans out, kisses your neck, as he slowly begins to move lazily. It's enough for pleasure- but not enough to make you cum. "Good fucking girl. Look at you. My baby." He chants, and something inside you stirs at the last words.

His Baby.

You're his.

He wants you.

It makes you whine as he chuckles, nipping at your skin. "You can touch me baby, good job." He says, and your hands are instantly around his neck. You're mumbling something, but its not words. It's not coming out the way you think it does, and Jungkook doesn't mind, doesn't care. Its another one of those things fueling him up, urging him on.

You're his perfect puzzle piece.

He lets go.

"Turn around princess." He says breathless, and you follow his instructions eagerly. His hand rests on the back of your neck for a moment, leaves its place for a second to move your hair away from your face, before he gently pushes down. He's inside in a heartbeat, this time thrusting with more strength.

Something overcomes him that hasn't happened before.

Usually, this position is what he loves most- and yet, it's not what he wants. He wants you, he wants you close, he cant touch you enough. His arms snake around your torso, just underneath the bottom of your breasts, as he pulls you towards him. Your back arches so prettily, and he gasps out, breathing heavy as he continues his attack on your neck. "You're mine." He growls out, can't keep it inside anymore, his grip on you tightening. "Mine." His thrusts stutter, his hand reaches for your center, desperate fingers helping you find your release. It coats your thighs, stains the bed, and he pushes himself as deep as he can once he finishes himself.

He's breathing heavily, he's out of his mind, running on autopilot as his hands still hold you. He pulls out after a moment, a whine from you getting reassured by his own voice, before he leaves the bed, getting a warm damp washcloth ready for you. He's careful, gentle, seems to caress your skin more than clean it, places kisses every now and then and sends praises your way.

"How do you feel?" He asks, voice low and caring as he continues his aftercare.

"Like you love me a lot." You sleepily say, eyes still foggy, and he smiles.

"Good." He tells you, reaching out to kiss your lips, still high on his own afterglow. "That's how you're always supposed to feel like."

"I've quit." He tells you one night on the couch, as you sit close to him. You'd asked him about his sidejob at Yoongi's- and this was his answer. Instantly, you sit up straight, fearing that he might've felt obligated because of you. "Before you start, yes, it was because of you." He says, and you already have the whine in your throat- but it doesn't make it out, as his fingers lazily trace your collarbone peaking out from his shirt you're wearing. "But it was also my decision. I just didn't enjoy it anymore- and you're more I could ever want really." He says, shrugging as you stare at him.

It was still new to you.

Although you knew that he was probably more than just a wild loverboy collecting partners and gaming all day, you never would've thought of him like this. He's a kid at heart still, teasing and playfighting every now and then- but he's mostly a strong shoulder to lean on for you. He really is the security and safety you'd always searched for. "What're you thinking about?" He asks, pulling you closer as he continues watching the TV show.

"You." You say, and he chuckles.

"Cute." He answers. He looks at you for a moment, TV long forgotten, before you crawl over his lap, shirt rising enough to give him free view of your thighs and panties. You've skipped the pants tonight- a habit of yours he enjoys a lot. His palms instantly find the soft skin, running along the outside of your thighs before they find your behind, squeezing, before he slaps it playfully. He grins as you squeal, admiring the way the very tips of your ears turn red. "You're really precious, you know that?" He tells you, and you shrug. "You are." He confirms, and you smile shyly.

"May I kiss you?" You ask, and he smiles warmly.

"We're not in a scene baby, do as you wish." He tells you, and you nod, leaning forward to capture his lips with yours. Its a feeling you can't quite get enough of, and it seems like he enjoys it equally as much. His inked hands find their way underneath your shirt, running over your back and spine as you shudder. He doesn't find what he seeks, your underwear long gone and left in the bedroom, and he loves it, instantly moves to your chest where he finds the soft flesh, his thumb running over one of your nipples teasingly. You're arching your back already, moving around as if you can't sit still. "My baby." He mumbles out, "If you can be so kind and get me a condom, you can ride me if you want to." He tells you, and you nod.

By now you easily know your way around his apartment.

So its no wonder you quickly return from your now shared bedroom, condom in hand as you approach him again, settling onto his lap. You're not shy with him nor his body anymore, eagerly taking the condom out of the package for him to roll it down onto his length. "You good?" He asks, and you nod, pulling your panties aside as you slowly sink down on him.

He lets his head rest back on the couch, and you lean into him, for a change returning the favor of kissing his neck. He's grinning, throughoutly enjoying things, and you love watching him. It's a visual reminder to yourself that this is your doing. You're making him feel that way, and no one else. It makes you confident, and it makes you feel cherished in ways you haven't felt before.

Once you start to move, Jungkooks hands help you along. Its slow and lazy, not at all hurried. There's no real goal; you probably wouldn't even mind not cumming at all. This was just being close- a way of feeling connected in the most intimate of ways. Connected like only lovers could be.

You love him.

And it slips out as a tiny 'I love you' in between your sighs and gasps, and he hears it so clearly, he can't help himself but speed up the pace.

"I love you too." He chants out, kissing the side of your head as you rest against his chest, head on his shoulder. "I love you so much." He says, almost inaudible, his arms holding you as close as he can.

Jeon Jungkook doesn't need sex to feel satisfied.

But he will most certainly need you for now and forever.

And he's totally fine with that.

(c)Bonny-Kookoo. You know the drill. I know where you live. I don't. But still. Be scared. Boo.

#bts imagine #bts #bts fanfic #jungkook imagine #bts fic #bts smut #bts jungkook #jeon jungkook #jungkook #bts reactions #Rabbit Boy AU

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gothhisoka · 4 years ago

Text

𝖂𝖔𝖗𝖘𝖍𝖎𝖕 (𝕮𝖍𝖗𝖔𝖑𝖑𝖔 𝖝 𝕱𝖊𝖒𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗)

Title: Worship

Pairing: Chrollo x Femreader

Warnings: Smut, minors DNI, 18+, explicit content

Word Count: 3116 (I promise it is worth it. Oh god is it worth it)

Note: This is from my cross-published fanfic called Hunter University! It is available if you click here on Wattpad and AO3. My fanfic is x OC, but I upload x Reader versions of some chapters here on Tumblr. In short, it is a dark academia college AU with Chrollo as the main love interest.

Background: You are an artist in college and Chrollo is your fellow classmate. You just returned from a night out at a ball, drunk. Chrollo appeared at the door to your dorm room as he promised he would after you danced with one another at the ball.

Chrollo was surprised you looked so intact. He was sure you would come waddling to the door in pajamas as you did the last time he visited your room. Although it had been an hour since the ball ended, your makeup hadn't smudged a bit. Sure, it was faded, and your hair was significantly messier, but overall you looked as remarkable as you did at the start of the ball.

Your tired eyes widened with surprise at the sight of him. He was just as unimpaired as you were. Though now he was missing his suit jacket. His hair had become slightly disheveled, losing its styled waves. He still had on those signature silver rings and little cross earrings.

You attempt to soak in his sight with your intoxicated brain. He looked even more captivating in this particular state.

“Hi…” was all you could utter.

“Can I come in?”

You realized he was waiting for your permission. He didn’t need it.

You stepped aside to let him in and shut the door. Your room was the same as the last time he saw it, with your drawings hung on the walls and lights strung above the desk. Their small bulbs reflected against the night-stained window.

Upon shutting the door, the tension noticeably rose. It was dark in the small space and you were alone. Chrollo took his black dress shoes off near the door, placing them neatly side by side.

So he plans on staying. You tried to hide a smile. The hour of his visit was surely suspicious. There could be only one thing on his mind.

"So what're you doing here?" you spoke nonchalantly, acting like you didn't just fantasize about what could happen in the next few minutes.

Chrollo opened and shut his mouth, his response escaping him. He turned back to you and used his eyes to convey a craving far deeper than any words could admit.

"I said I would come to find you, didn't I?" He said lowly.

He had begun to walk around the room, absentmindedly stopping at a piece of art from time to time. You were too tired to care. The collection included nature scenes, portraits of people he didn't recognize, anatomy studies, and...

He paused, noticing a drawing on the wall behind the place where the door would otherwise be covering.

It was a full-body anatomy study of yourself. To be specific, it would fit further in the category of a glorified nude. It was on a miniature piece of parchment sketched in charcoal. It was obviously you: the woman had your (hair color) hair and distinct mouth and nose. The paper was hardly noticeable amongst the scatter of papers. You wouldn't see it unless you had a careful eye such as that of Chrollo.

You hardly noticed when he reached the particular spot on your wall. Your tiredness had waned significantly with Chrollo's entrance, but it still fogged your mind.

Additionally, you had long forgotten about your secret behind-the-door location for your drawings that were not meant to be seen by a single soul.

Chrollo attempted to hide a mysterious smile. He turned to you, “You draw wonderfully.”

“Thanks?” you reply, with more question in your tone than you hoped to show.

The heat in the room shot through the roof. You were sure if you checked the temperature it would be well above its normal chilly state. Perhaps it was the heat in your cheeks that was causing such a change.

“So…” he began.

“So,” you replied, trying to avoid eye contact. Please, just let it happen already.

You thought you had a good idea of why he had come to your room at one o'clock in the morning after a night of drinking and questionably close dancing. You couldn't be certain, though, because that was just how he was: unpredictable and exceedingly complicated.

You didn’t think him so complicated as to not be able to admit why he was at your room, though.

You waited as he thought about what to say next. This is taking too damn long.

Luckily, you prepared an excuse. You never failed to come ready for something you could expect. And this, the direction in which your encounter is headed, is inevitable. You had been rehearsing the line in your head for the duration of their conversation like reviewing terms for a test.

This was the only way to test if your assumptions are correct.

Blame it on the champagne if I am wrong. But I really hope I'm right.

You look directly at him. Time to be daring.

You took a breath and did your best to look directly at him, "Well, I actually do need some help. You see, this dress is quite difficult to take off by myself..."

Walking towards him, you place a hand at the hem of your dress. Your delicate fingers wrap around its lacy fabric.

Chrollo looked amused. He sizes you up, looking from your hand holding the hem of your dress to your unfazed expression. Unfazed, yet your cheeks were slowly turning a shade of scarlet. Nice try, Chrollo thought.

He gestured, "Turn around."

You obeyed. You desired something far more than the unzipping of your dress, but you were not presumptuous enough to say it. The expression on Chrollo's face told you that he was hoping for the same thing. He hid many emotions well, but being turned on wasn't one of them.

Chrollo brushed your hair away from the zipper, delicately placing it over your shoulder. His fingers purposefully grazed your back as he did this, causing your breath to hitch slightly.

His hands moved to the zipper, carefully pulling it down. It went past the clasp of your bra to your lower back. There was complete silence. Both of you were still. Are we still hesitating?

Chrollo was the first to move. He pulled you close to him so that your back was touching him. His left arm wrapped across your chest possessively, holding you in a tight embrace. With his other hand, he brushed your hair back from your ear. He smelt of sweet alcohol. Clearly, he was slightly drunk as well, for the next words he said couldn't be uttered by a sober man.

His whispered breath tickled your neck, husky with the threat of sleep, "I want you so bad right now."

You tensed with a sudden surge of desire. Your impression had been right. He let his strong arm remain around you, patiently waiting for a response.

You choked out your reply, "The feelings' mutual."

Under his touch, your streak of audacity from earlier dissolved into compliance. You suddenly wanted nothing more than to submit to his words.

With complete control, Chrollo took your shoulder and turned you around. Your dress was now loose on your shoulders. He placed his hands around your hips firmly. He looked at you under his thick eyelashes and slowly leaned in. The pressure was growing to an unbearable level, but he still wouldn't go all the way.

Then his lips crashed against yours with the force of weeks of pent-up desire. This kiss didn't speak of courtesy, of patience. This was raw passion. It was furious and messy. you preferred this to sensitive steps around the intensity they both craved.

"You must still be drunk," you said playfully as you both pulled away to catch your breath. You held your hand to Chrollo's chest. His heart was beating surprisingly fast.

"If I'm drunk, then what are you?" Chrollo said with a lazy smirk.

"I'm drunk as well."

Chrollo threaded his hands through your hair, pulling the long strands through his fingers. He pulled you in close again with his hand at the back of your head.

You opened your mouth to allow for Chrollo's tongue to slip in. He lessened the intensity and slowly moved his tongue against your own tongue and lips. You couldn't help but let out soft moans that made Chrollo weak at the knees.

He pushed you against the wall to deepen your kiss. Drawings fluttered down, becoming detached with the sudden movement. Including that drawing.

Chrollo pulled away, much to your shock. You were left panting with reddened cheeks. Please don't let this end now.

He displayed a shit-eating grin. Even with his ego, in the current moment, his expression made you melt. His face was inches from yours, looking down into your (eye color) eyes.

He shifted his gaze down to the floor and said, "Nice drawing you have there."

You finally noticed what he had been so smug about. Shit. Your face flushed ten different shades of scarlet.

Chrollo leaned in as he did before and murmured in your ear, "I wish I could see the real thing."

You failed to not show your excitement. The way your eyes lit up exposed you. "I can arrange that."

At that, Chrollo leaned in again, this time moving to your neck. His lips fluttered down your throat to your collarbone. You leaned your head back and tried to control your uneven breath.

His lips reached the edge of the neckline on your dress. He raised his eyes to meet yours, asking for permission to go further.

You let out a breathy, "Yes. Please."

What you wanted to say was, Please, take me now.

It could be too soon for him. But based on how this was going, you expected it was leading to something more. Whatever that was, you wished you could know right now. The growing tension between your thighs began to ache.

Chrollo slipped his hand across your skin to the hemline of your dress, moving it completely off of your shoulder and down your arms. Your black see-through bra was now in full view. Your nipples grew hard at the sudden exposure.

At least I went with my fancy bra. You suddenly grew very shy. The last time you went even this far was years ago.

He evidently liked the lingerie for his hands immediately traveled to your breast to caress it as he continued to kiss you.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered against your neck. Your heart fluttered at his words.

Chrollo then moved his lips progressively further down as he slipped your dress off of your body. Soon your underwear came into view, then your feet. He helped your step out of the dress.

"Your turn," you said, unbuttoning his shirt. All the while he continued to distractingly leave lazy kisses upon your face, one on your forehead, your cheek, your lips.

After an agonizingly long time, you pulled off his shirt. Fuck.

You knew he would be defined. But him, this boy standing in front of you, resembled more of a greek statue than an actual human. It looked like his body had been sculpted by the finest stone on earth. He had a six-pack, defined pectoral muscles, and prominent collarbones. His biceps flexed as he leaned his hand against the wall, bracing himself. It was you who needed to brace yourself. Your breath hitched again at the sight of him.

You ran a hand up his firm body as you planted your lips upon his once again. This time Chrollo put his hands beneath your thighs, his fingers pressing into your soft skin. He picked you up easily.

You wrapped your legs around him as he brought you to the bed, kissing him all the while.

He dropped you down gently, releasing his grip off of your thighs. You took this time to look up at him and admire the beauty of his aroused state. He had a dangerous and wild look, with tousled hair and a constant smile playing at his lips. His heavy-lidded eyes were lazily focused upon you.

You continued to make out on the bed, its white silk sheets creating an angelic halo around you. Chrollo couldn't stand looking at you like this, underneath him. It was far too much power for one man to hold.

You reached to your back to undo the clasp of your bra. You threw it to the ground. Chrollo immediately began to touch your naked tits in a way that made you want to dissolve. He moved in circles around your nipples first, watching as they grew harder under his expert touch. Then he moved his mouth to the sensitive area, playing with you and biting slightly. You audibly moaned at the gesture. Damn the neighbors.

Chrollo sensed your desire to take it further. He looked up, grey eyes filled with lust, "Y/n...let me pleasure you."

It wasn't the suggestion you were expecting, but you were satisfied nonetheless. You didn't care about anything in the world besides what he could do to you at this moment, whatever it may be.

"If you say my name like that you can do anything you want to me," you said breathily. It was exactly what he needed to hear.

Chrollo smirked and moved to take off your soaking underwear. Under his pants, his dick grew visibly harder. He threw the underwear onto the floor.

Gently placing his finger at your throbbing core, he began to stroke. Upon receiving his touch your back arched involuntarily. You were beyond eager.

"Fuck... Chrollo..."

This served as encouragement for him to insert his finger deeper into you, curling it slightly. It hit your g-spot repeatedly, eliciting ungodly sounds from you.

As he was doing this, he slowly positioned himself on top of you, grabbing onto the bed frame with his spare hand. He just wanted to look at your face as you opened your mouth in delight.

He inserted one more finger which caused your arousal to heighten. God, he really knows how to do this.

Just as you felt the heat in your core escalating, he slid his finger out. You whimpered in protest.

Chrollo looked down at you with a wicked smile. "Beg for it."

Oh fuck.

You gladly would. It was more your instincts speaking than any coherent thought.

"Please... Chrollo..." you said between breaths.

You wanted to not only plead for him, you wanted to worship him.

"More."

This is what you had been missing out on all those weeks. And oh god, did you eat it up.

"FUCK please do that again," you exclaimed.

It was enough to convince him. Chrollo moved his face towards your slickened pussy.

Is he about to...

He pushed his hair back out of his face with his clean hand, his forehead tattoo revealed. For only a second, he raised his eyes to gaze into yours. You fell for him all over again at that simple glance.

Then he entered you. His tongue made you want to weep. He devoured your insides, soaking up the salty juices. You couldn't help but hold his head, pulling it closer to your body. You ran your hand through his soft black hair. There was so much heat between them that you were both perspiring.

You began to shudder." I'm going to... oh... fuck," you gasped.

You felt the sweet release of cum spread below you onto the sheets and Chrollo himself. You felt self-conscious for a moment. That is until Chrollo began to lick up your juices. He ran his tongue up your soft thighs.

"You taste so fucking good, darling."

Chrollo looked at you like he had fallen all over again as well. You grinned back at him. Your cheeks grew even redder, if possible. Your heart screamed to continue but you were too physically exhausted to move. Still, wouldn't Chrollo want his turn?

You laid there, naked and panting on the silk sheets. Chrollo flopped next to you, unaffected beside his flushed cheeks and a wide grin.

The lights were still low in the little room. Looking out the window, you saw that the sun had yet to rise. This was a positive fact because the only thing you needed to do now was to sleep. And preferably, cuddling with the boy next to you. You hoped he would stay. It was more than hope, really. Your body couldn't spend any more time away from him after that.

Damn. He was good. He was really, really fucking good.

He knew his way with words, to begin with. He said exactly what needed to be said to escalate your arousal. You wanted to worship those fingers, the way he so expertly felt around you like he had memorized a map. And his tongue was even more worthy of revere.

You flipped over to your elbows. Your breasts brushed against the bedding, noticeably making Chrollo gulp. You boldly reached to touch the front of his pants.

"You don't want a turn?" you smirked.

"This was more than enough for me."

He stared into your eyes as if he was calculating a complex math problem rather than looking at the person who just received the best head of their life.

You yawned, despite yourself. Your body ached with all the action of the night.

"Go to bed, sweetheart. I'll be here."

Those were the last words you heard before your eyes drifted shut. Exhaustion stilled your naked body. Chrollo reached over you to turn off the bedside lamp.

He wasn't nearly as tired. He could've gone for a couple more rounds, perhaps take it a step further if you so desired. But he knew you needed the sleep. Most of your makeup had rubbed off, displaying the dark circles under your eyes.

He slipped off his pants and threw them onto the floor with the rest of the clothes. He found the soft sheets and pulled them across you and himself. The bed was small but cozy. His strong chest was flush against your back.

Your (hair color) hair smelt of a summer day, like sunlight and wildflowers. He took this opportunity to feel up the rest of your glorious body. He ran his hand lightly from your shoulder to your hips, to your thighs. All of it was angelic to him.

He moved you closer with his arm, protectively wrapping it across your front. Somehow holding you like this felt far more intimate than any sexual activity. The way the moonlight graced your skin was majestic.

How had he fallen so hard, so fast? It was unlike him to act with such recklessness.

Through it all, he still had his mind. you had no way to tell the extent of his feelings. He made sure of this. His libido could act one way, that was clear from tonight. But he was an expert at controlling his outward emotions. You would never know. If you did, it would be over for him. All the planning will be for naught.

He closed his eyes before he could fall upon any more worries. He had already pondered the issue for many sleepless nights.

He fell into a dreamless slumber with you safe in his arms. You both slept soundly until the sun peeked through the window.

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