#I think my sign for being obsessed with a character rn is the fact I’m breaking away from ship stuff and just looking at them alone

[trashbatistrash]

,

[ziggy-stardust-is-in-love]

musical rant rn go

goodness gracious I wrote an entire novel yesterday and it all got deleted. Whatever.

OKAY HERE ARE ALL OF THE MUSICALS I THINK ABOUT IN ORDER

Frozen: Every six year old girl was obsessed with Frozen, including me. Good soundtrack and nostalgia. I still really want my theatre to do this show, but I’m not sure which role I’d want. Elsa, Anna, Christof, Olaf? I dunno. Too many good options

Hercules: One of my favorite movies since I was little. Insanely good soundtrack and super fun characters. If my theatre did this one I still wouldn’t know which role I’d want. Hercules would be great, but Meg is so fun, but Hades is even more fun!!

The Lorax: I’m considering this a musical so shut up. This has also been one of my favorites since I was little. Fun fact: as student council president I came up with the idea of making a Lorax themed bulletin board and we did it!! 💪 I think my presidency will be remembered as year of the Lorax or something like that. We’d come in every meeting and I’d play the soundtrack while we worked, it was perfect. I ALSO WANT MY THEATRE TO DO THIS BUT ID WANT TO PLAY EVERY ROLE. THEYRE ALL SO PERFECT

Sister Act: Pretty uncommon. The only reason i really listen to the soundtrack or anything was bc I was in it. This is the first musical I ever did (I’ve done 5 now) and in this I played Monsignor O’Hara, which is a pretty great role for a first time actor. I got to dad dance a deliver cheesy lines. The soundtrack is pretty good to me, but that might just be because of the distinct memories I have with each one. Like the time the power went out during a rehearsal so everyone sat in front of the stage with their phone flashlights on. That was super fun. Or all of my friends and I playing flee the facility on Roblox. 🥹 miss all of that

Dear Evan Hansen: or however it’s spelled. I’ve only read the book and occasionally heard the songs. The book was really good and I should really learn more about the musical.

Newsies: Second musical I was in and my first big role. Jacks best friend. It was awesome!! Before auditions I went over to my friend Emma’s house. She’s the one who brought me to theatre and we were watching newsies bc we knew nothing about it. I immediately, from the very first scene, wanted crutchie. Emma really wanted Katherine. I’ll always remember Emma FaceTiming me as soon as the cast list came out and telling me we got our dream roles and we were in the same cast. That was the best summer ever.

Elf: I don’t talk about this one too much bc it’s just trauma. I simply played a background elf because of my big role last show. I had two lines 😭 We did this for some reason and I decided “wouldn’t it be just great to bring my bf (now ex) to theatre!” So I did. What was I thinking. Halfway through rehearsals he broke up with me. I had to see him twice a week and it really sucked. I’m not gonna get too far into it bc my ex literally ruined my life but anyways

Wicked: My theatre didn’t do this play, I got to see it on broadway in November. It was really great. I went in knowing nothing about wicked and I came out obsessed. I was able to get a full cast signed poster and a copy of the novel. I’d definitely want to do this production at my theater someday but I just don’t know who I’d want to be. Elphaba or Glinda? Either way great show and good soundtrack for sure

Sweeney Todd: EEE!! Okay so the show itself is incredible. Great story, good characters, magnificent music, a 10/10 show for my theatre to do. The bad part is that this was just for the older age group, which means our director put a lot of pressure on us. Ever rehearsal someone went home crying (usually me) and nobody was having fun. I actually had an incredible role because I mentioned wanting Sweeney in auditions and I didn’t realize how much work that actually was. Thankfully they gave me an even better role: ANTHONY!! Still not my favorite role, Crutchie will always have that, but it’s awesome!! Being a lovesick sailor is basically me.

Heathers: Another fun musical!! We haven’t done this at my theatre and I don’t think we ever will 😔 I personally love belting these songs when I’m home alone, but that applies to basically all of these. Also if you’ve read this far that’s impressive bro. (Also I might start a secret side blog of me singing) but that’s a secret between you, me, and anyone else who read this far

American Idiot: The Green Day musical!! The music is obviously super good and the story is a bit strange but it’s really fun to watch slime tutorials of it on YouTube. (For any of you who don’t know, slime tutorials are what we call videos filming broadway productions because they’re illegal and a way for YouTube to not take them down is if you title them “slime tutorial.” If you ever want to see a bit of a musical poorly recorded on a trash phone, look up the name of the musical and you’ll usually find some.)

Peter Pan: Honestly a trash musical. The story makes no sense and most of the music is garbage. I played a lost boy, which is basically the only fun role in the whole show. I knew all of my other lost boys well, someone of them were already my best friends, so we were just a gang of rascals. Little Shop of Horrors: I went to a local production knowing very little and I came out of this one obsessed as well!!!! The soundtrack is sooo goood and my friends and I are super close to getting our theatre to do it. I would def want Seymour, Audrey, or Orin (the dentist)

WOW TYSM FOR LETTING ME GO ON A RANT I REALLY NEEDED THAT!!!!! YAYYY!!!! I think this is a complete list but I dunno. I’ll see if I forgot something at some point

[gojoest]

Hi Ai👋 Can i ask your opinion about something? Do you think selfship with character is weird? Because my friend told me its weird, cringe and kinda disgusting so I feel really bad whenever I ship myself with canon characters and I don’t know what should I do or feel whenever I hear my friend’s opinion. And do you ever feel jealous when someone ship themselves with satoru or make headcanon about them? I just want to know your opinion since you are my favorite blog. Whenever you are ranting about your favs (Satoru) it makes me happy and normal for liking characters. I hope its not too long ask and hope you have a wonderful day! 💕☀️

hi beloved! i’m sorry your friend made you feel that way, that’s not very kind of them. while i might not know a single thing about them, this alone speaks volumes to me about their personality (which i already dislike quite a bit for obvious reasons. i’m sorry i rly don’t want to badmouth them but this is just so rude of them i can’t….)

you should absolutely never ever feel bad about doing things that bring you joy! and it’s not only about selfshipping really, it’s about anything — whatever it is that makes you happy, there’s absolutely no reason for you to feel bad about it. with that being said, there will always be ppl that will either be skeptical of your interests or straight up negative, rude and will even shame you (sadly). there’s nothing weird or disgusting about selfshipping with characters. in fact, it’s a very wonderful experience, very personal. there’s simply ppl who don’t quite get it, and that’s fine. it’s not everyone’s cup of tea, that’s okay, too! we’re all built to have different interests and likes anyway but not understanding the purpose of something or doing but still disliking it anyway gives you absolutely no right to shame or disrespect ppl that find joy in it. i think those who rly love you won’t ever judge you anyway, so maybe this is a sign for you to seriously reconsider your friendship with the said person. while you might not have control over their behavior (that obviously hurts you), you do over yours — you get to choose who to surround yourself with, and you deserve to be with ppl that love you and don’t ever judge you, and by “you” i mean all of you, even the parts they don’t understand or find to be quirky.

i don’t ever feel jealous seeing others selfship with my faves, i love to see it actually and even encourage it (sometimes even abuse my friends so they start liking satoru v_v). + i adore reading my moots selfship lore, the more they talk / write about my faves the better bc i get content from literal gods! (they are sooo talented pls!!!) + it always hits different interacting with ppl that are equally obsessed with satoru as i am, idk it just feels like we have a very deep and unbreakable bond between us lksajdhs it’s like blood is thicker than water but the blood in question is our love for satoru

i also hope you know i am literally sobbing into my hands rn bc you are way too sweet! being your favorite blog? making you happy? oh god it’s an honor T—T thank you for bearing with me and even loving my nonsense on here, i greatly appreciate you! sending you a big hug!!!!!!

[saltwatersweets]

sorry I can’t read your whole post atm I’m busy rn but in case I forget, I understand c!Dream was just intimidating c!tommy and just putting on a villain persona, but my main point ig is that even though it’s an act, it still caused c!tommy to think he was going after him all the time and put that in his head so by that logic c!dreams confusion over c!tommy believing he’s targeting him doesn’t make much sense to me. He should be aware that even tho it was an act, it would still cause c!tommy to think he’s after him like the chase scene talked about killing and reviving him a bunch of times and then the signs after that with the smiles and telling c!tommy that he’s watching him. I’m struggling to explain it sorry. Also, c!dream somehow knew c!tommy was farming potato’s in the finale which suggests he was watching him at some point, but likely was just making sure he wasn’t causing problems. I could pretend to strongly hate someone and target them and from my pov it’s pretend, it’s Disney villain not srs but for them it’s genuine and I would not be surprised if that person attacked me months later under the belief that I was obsessed with hurting them.

Ty for explaining more in depth though ❤️

(the context, i assume)

this is a good point !! again though i wasn't really trying to say that i was able to fully explain c!dream's thought process in the finale, moreso just putting some thoughts out there ! (honestly, a lot of my "analysis" of c!dream is less so me actually analysing him and being able to 100% explain his actions all the time; much of the time it's just me seeing certain parts of his character and pointing out the fact that i think they're interesting.)

if anyone can give a better answer feel free to jump in!

[weirdthoughtsandideas]

If DCLA characters had Tumblr part 4 🕺🏼

🏳️‍🌈 creyendoenmi follow

So! What were some early signs you weren’t straight?

I myself used to make an entire neighbourhood in the Sims 2, all lesbians. The only males were their kids.

🌼 punk-not-dead follow

I had a teacher in second grade and I was EXTREMELY HAPPY over the fact that she was divorced...

🎀 italys-biggest-bow-collector follow

Watched Lady Oscar religiously. Iykyk

🎸 beanie-guitarist follow

So I realized I was bi very late but I really should have seen the early signs.

I used to be obsessed with Sailor Moon. Like I saw Tuxedo Mask and stuff happened with me.

🏳️‍🌈 creyendoenmi follow

”Stuff happened”? 😏

🎸 beanie-guitarist follow

Stuff being that I had imaginary fantasies of him saving me and when I saw him on TV I felt butterflies in my stomach. Nothing more than that, I was like 7.

✌🏼 arodarmivida follow

I can’t come up with much early signs and I got caught off guard because I am laughing at the divorced teacher story

#user punk-not-dead you are so unhinged and I love it

333 notes

🎤 singing-is-who-i-am follow

Sometimes I wanna confront my dad about stuff he did in the past. But it’s so hard just say it out of nowhere. We are having a good time, I don’t just wanna ruin it by being like ”hey dad even if we have fun rn, later when I go to bed I will remember all the things that you did that really hurt me and I just feel like I never really got a proper apology. We just moved on from it and never discuss old things”

#vilu gets real #<< this is the hashtag that I want you to block angie if you haven’t already #i don’t want any family member to see it

2 notes

🛼 rollerskatingonthemoon follow

💬 Anonymous asked:

Hi! What’s your sexuality? If you’re ok with answering that.

🛼 rollerskatingonthemoon replied:

Hi anonymous! That is a fun question!

I’ve never thought that much about it. As a kid I just assumed everyone liked everyone. I’ve thought boys AND girls have been very pretty.

Though I have not thought so much about romance. Roller skating is my main ”hyperfixation” as I’ve heard people describe it, in life. I think kissing is fun, though. It tickles.

💍 queenoftherink follow

She’s roller skate sexual 🩷

🛼 rollerskatingonthemoon follow

No! I don’t experience sexual feelings for roller skates 😠 That would be so weird!!

💍 queenoftherink follow

Omg sorry I forgot to write the /j !

19 notes

🎀 italys-biggest-bow-collector follow

@singing-is-who-i-am we kinda look like a couple here lol

🎤 singing-is-who-i-am follow

Omg yeah 🥹

🌼 punk-not-dead follow

Year 1…

🌼 punk-not-dead follow

Year 2…

🎀 italys-biggest-bow-collector follow

What are you doing, Cami?

🌼 punk-not-dead follow

You’ll see when it happens. Meanwhile I’m gonna count each year that passes before it does.

2 years and 1 day this far…

55 notes

🏍️ entre-dos-mundos follow

Hi, I’m Leon and I just joined tumblr. I will mainly post about motorcross and put up some music I’m doing here.

🥸 jeremias-realperson follow

Hi Leon! Do you have a girlfriend?

🏍️ entre-dos-mundos follow

They did warn me about creeps on here but I didn’t think I’d encounter one so quickly.

5 notes

🌟 supernova-number-one follow

You don’t know true awkwardness until you live in the same house as your ex and you see each other walk around in sleepwear

💍 queenoftherink follow

Haha. I’ve had two exes who lived in the same house as me.

Both of them were also the exes of my cousin. I don’t know how we can have the same taste in boys or how those boys could have such variety in taste of women

None of them saw me walk around in sleepwear because I often stayed in my room when I wore that. Well, except for one of them, he saw me in my sleepwear… but… he was not my ex after that night 😏

🌟 supernova-number-one follow

So you killed him????

60 notes

📸 felicityfornow follow

It took me too long to realize my mom and her wife were together.

Like, when we moved in with her wife, there was several spare rooms, but my mom chose to share a bed with her. I just thought ”well they are best friends maybe that’s cozier”.

🧢 everythingscominguponmaxi follow

But you moved into her house, so I am going from assumption that you moved in because they got married?

📸 felicityfornow follow

Oh no, we originally moved in with her because our house was being renovated. Then we just stayed… forever.

They only got married last year.

🎀 italys-biggest-bow-collector follow

Well tbh, friends do share beds a lot… I wish I do that more when I sleep over at my friend’s house.

#i get lowkey disappointed when she pulls out a mattress I want to sleep with her #sleep with her as actual sleeping don’t be weird

11 notes

🌼 punk-not-dead follow

I love reading fanfictions out loud. I read one as a bedtime story to my sisters the other day.

🌟 supernova-number-one follow

I’m terrified of the thought of someone reading my fanfictions out loud… they should be read in silence and in secret just like when I write them.

🌼 punk-not-dead follow

Oh fun because the fic I read out loud was your 140 chapter one! We laughed our asses off!

Also my sister wants to know if that oc spacewoman with a flower headband is based on me

👩🏻‍🦱 dangerously-beautiful-ant follow

I’m also wondering that ^. As well as if your OC that the main character met in chapter 75 at the space café was based on me. ”She was shorter with curly black hair”.

🌟 supernova-number-one follow

…

Stop reading my fanfictions those are only for people who don’t know me irl

7 notes

😎 rapmiro follow

Here is today’s rap.

When you try your best

You refuse to rest

And you get a reject

Don’t get wrecked

She says she doesn’t like you

She lies, bro, relax

She only wants to tease you

Soon she’ll stick to you like wax

🏳️‍🌈 creyendoenmi follow

Did you write this because I rejected you when you asked me to fly to Chile alone with you?

🍓 chico-fresa follow

@creyendoenmi WHO ARE YOU?!

3 notes

🎸 beanie-guitarist follow

Randomly remember when @rollerskatingonthemoon was trying out fnaf and she kept dying because she WANTED the animatronics to come into her office. ”They look so cute!”

🛼 rollerskatingonthemoon follow

But they did look so cute 😍🥰🥹 !!!!

🎸 beanie-guitarist follow

I want everyone to know we went to see the movie together and after witnessing Freddy BITE A HUMAN IN HALF she just went ’oh he was just excited to meet her! It’s not easy being a giant robot, you get some accidents!”

#the fort building scene was her fave scene ofc

66 notes

✌🏼 arodarmivida follow

Why didn’t I discover fanfiction until now this is the best thing ever!!

My gf and some friends have mentioned reading/writing it but I never really got into it myself. But now?? I love this so much!

✌🏼 arodarmivida follow

What does an E-rating mean?

✌🏼 arodarmivida follow

Oh.

Well it was very well written and the plot was ok, even if I didn’t need to get a detailed description of their genitalia…

📸 felicityfornow follow

I visibly mouthed ”oh no” when I saw you ask what an E-rating meant. Glad you didn’t get too traumatized. There are some out there that are really shocking.

✌🏼 arodarmivida follow

Yeah no this was just about two humans getting tentacles and sleeping with each other, so it wasn’t that big a deal.

Do you know some really sick and twisted fics?

📸 felicityfornow follow

I’d rather not share those, I want to spare you.

🏳️‍🌈 creyendoenmi follow

Jim what the HELL kind of fics did you find and also can you send me the tentacle fic

💍 queenoftherink follow

We are several who are interested in the tentacle fic. Thank you.

#i don’t even care if it’s a fandom I am unfamiliar with I need to check that out #for science

22 notes

🌼 punk-not-dead follow

I don’t think I’ve ever met a crazy blonde girl. All crazy girls I’ve met have been red haired.

That’s why I dyed my hair red 🧠

🎹 moondust-og follow

I don’t know if I would call myself crazy… though I guess I am a bit crazy 😜👩🏻‍🦰

💅🏼 ja-jazmin follow

Omg so true red hair is the best 🧚🏻‍♀️

✌🏼 arodarmivida follow

RED HAIR GANG!!! 🥳🧚🏻‍♀️👩🏻‍🦰🔴

70 notes

🧢 everythingscominguponmaxi follow

You wanna know the ugliest emoji according to me?

😛

Why is it like that. Why is it staring into my soul. It looks like a toddler who has licked on all of the furniture and now stares into your soul as they crap themselves.

🥸 jeremias-realperson follow

You know two emojis I very much enjoy?

👨‍👧👨‍👧‍👧

It reminds me of fatherhood and my daughter, and also my stepdaughter.

🧢 everythingscominguponmaxi follow

Good for you man

#just gonna assume ur a troll #i’ll let you have your fun

13 notes

[scott-mccall-the-hot-girl]

my ultimate guide to thiam fic !!

( as a new teen wolf stan )

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the classic post war, long ass (multi chapter) fic !!with great development that genuinely made me laugh out loud, they have the best friendship in this & i love it very much. ( like theo teaches liam to drive and i just *happy sobs* ) a fundamental in thiam fanfiction !! all stans have probably already read it but if you haven’t this is in fact a threat ,, go show this vv iconic story some love !!

Airplanes - Captainmintyfresh

Summary: After the Anuk-ite and the hunters are dealt with Liam needs a break. Cue Theo and a road trip that Liam should know better than to think will be peaceful.

Not Rated, No Archive Warnings Apply, Completed, 43/43 Chapters, Words: 236,875 (236k)

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okay okay so this one is also post 6B !! but ,, now we introduce fighting monroe & the hunters again ,, so we get the boys & a new mission !! so if you like an intresting plot 11/10 would recommend !! just to be clear this ISN’T complete ,, if that turns you off i understand but definitely give this one a read !! it litterally have theo doing crossword puzzles & fighting zombies

Vacancy Signs - LovelyLittleGrim

Summary: Theo and Liam are in Manhattan negotiating a pack allyship when the zombie apocalypse breaks out. Now, the two of them have to find their way back to Beacon Hills without getting eaten by zombies or killing one another.

Rated: Explicit, Graphic Description of Violence, Not Completed, 15/17 Chapters, Words: 89,605 (89k)

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Royalty AU !! I REPEAT ROYALTY AU !! a fantastic au where i stan their moms more than i stan them !! genuinely so good at the childhood rivals to lovers trope !! i’m genuinely obsessed with this one. has made me cry more than once ,, hurts in a good way <3 the ending is just *chefs kiss* also one of the tags is genuinely: # theo and liam make bad choices for over 130k straight !! if that doesn’t sound appealing i don’t know what does !!

Artificial Love - songbvrd

Summary: Prince Theo and Prince Liam are forced to spend every Summer together from age five onwards. They hate each other, and usually find ways to make each other miserable as much as possible in their six weeks together. But when they're reunited because of intended unions as adults, things change. They're both supposed to be married to noble women, but neither of them is as interested in anyone else as they are with their childhood rival.

Rated: Mature, No Archive Warnings Apply, Completed, Chapters: 32/32, Words: 172,935 (172k)

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so if you are in the mood for a crack fic that’s not explicitally a crack fic this is for you !! okay so i’m really hit or miss with AU’s ,, sometimes i feel like they don’t quite capture the characters right but this story have the BEST dramatic liam i have ever seen in my life !! basically they all live in the same apartment building & it’s fantastic !! i saw this one floating around a lot but the summary didn’t really unrest me until i have it a shot !! so go read it rn !! also nolan & brett are genuinely fantastic and make me wheeze ,, LIKE ACTUALLY VERBALLY LAUGHING !! all i’m gonna say is that my fav characters are scott & the beetles but that won’t make actual sense until you read it !!

The Neighbors Song - TheodoreR

Summary: “I always hear you singing on your balcony every morning, but suddenly you’ve stopped?”

Or the one where Theo annoys Liam every morning with his awful singing until he doesn’t anymore and Liam is even more annoyed. Liam hates every single thing about his mornings -the fact that they happen in the morning alone is enough. The thing Liam hates the most about his mornings though is the terrible voice of the guy who lives below him. He can’t sing for shit and Liam tried to politely let him understand that by throwing flour and water on his balcony, and also by shouting it to him, you can’t sing for shit!, and then by writing it into a note he proceeded to attach to his door, but this Raeken guy just keeps doing it, every single morning, like a fucking rooster. Liam did nothing to deserve this. He probably didn’t do anything to deserve better either to be fair, he doesn’t expect to open his window and be welcomed by some angelic voice singing him good morning, he’d just be happy with nothing. Silence. That’s something Liam can appreciate in mornings. Just some bark from his dog and the sound of his misery and that’s it. But no, god forbid the new guy lets him have that.

Rated: Explicit, Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Wanrings, Completed, 8/8 Chapters, Words: 42,814 (42k)

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me: i’m not a big fan of AU’s ,, proceeds to talk about ANOTHER au… OKAY BUT THIS ONE !! it’s not complete but the author has been updating regularly ,, vv slow burn !! but in a REALLY intresting way !! i lOVE LIAM IN THIS SO MUCH ,, he is such a diaster of a person and it’s wonderful !! they have a great dynamic & i’m sucker for general puppy pack content ( and erica reyes being a badass ) !! also theo plays lacrosse in this & i really like it ahhhhh ,, also liam is just being an artic monkeys stan the whole time & theo is like *que confused repressed gay noises*

Inglorious Roommates - honeyscape

Summary: A roommate is defined as “a person with whom one shares a room.”

Theo would say a roommate was more along the lines of, “The person who's the bane of his existence. The weirdo that sleeps for days. The spaz that exercises at 3am. The guy with a revolving door of annoying friends. An insufferable human being that Theo has no control over living in his room.”

Example: Theo hates his roommate Liam.

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okay okay i hate myself but i have another WIP for y’all !! this one is jUST FANTASTIC. i’m genuinely so upset it’s most likely not going to updated again *incoherent screaming ensues*. for this story ,, it’s very theo-centric bUT thats bc it ends right before liam becomes a concrete member of the story !! ANYWAY: basic plot = theo & acquiring not one but two children ,, so #dad theo but he is still crusty & homeless and i love him very much. it’s just so GOOD !! just read if you want to experience my fav theo coming out story & him etching high school musical

Look who's talking - Captainmintyfresh

Summary: Theo had been labeled many things in his life. Evil, failure, monster. He'd never thought Father would be one of those things but as he looked across the table to a six year old with blue smears of bubble gum icecream across her face trying to coax the first words out of her sister. Finger jabbing towards Theo's face as she repeated 'Daddy' again and again he couldn't bring himself to dispute the label.

(Theo accidentally adopts two young werewolves)

Not Rated, Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings, Not Completed, Chapters: 16/?, Words: 48740 ( 48k )

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so here me out: post-canon ( poetry like angst ) summer get away !! just the boys doing cute little domestic things together whilst pining !! theo’s guilt in this is just so powerful & aGjffkgkkfkvkdlv !! i think it’s so interesting to see how they interact in this one, it’s just very heart warming !! and it features one of my favorite niche teen wolf tropes of theo being great with like seven year old girls- it’s just so good ,, very much a wonderful little one shot that just makes your heart happy.

(next time i see you you'll show me) a hundred different ways to say the same things - cherrysprite

Summary: “...You deserve good things,” Liam says eventually. He makes sure not to look at Theo even though he can feel his eyes turn on him. Somehow he can already tell that Theo doesn’t believe him.

Liam instantly makes that the goal of this summer - making Theo believe him.

Rating: Teen and Up, No Archive Warnings Apply, Chapters: 1/1, Words: 28875 ( 28k )

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okay so this next section of fic recs is a bit different !!

two of my favorite authors !! and a compilation of fics i’ve read by them both !!

for context: these two have written some genuinely gorgeous fics, like pure poetry, they explore the real gritty & scary side of our boys relationship in such a wonderful way. they’ve both used some of my favorite tropes & i love them very much !!

whenever i need something soothing but so genuinely intresting & enticing these are my go to !! ( also they both write a lot of good nolan angst & some vv good fics with hayden )

go check out:

eneiryu

as well as fallingforboys

here are some of my favorite fics by them ~

darling i want you here in my arms (kiss the pain away, i know you can) - fallingforboys

even before you touched me, i belonged to you (all you had to do was look at me) - fallingforboys

memories linger like tattoo scars (but your touch on my skin is just as permanent) - fallingforboys

skin, bones, a stolen heart, and an ugly creature lurking underneath -fallingforboys

i don't know how to breathe in the place i called home - fallingforboys

whisper your gossamer truths into the shadow, maybe you'll find the answers you're searching for - fallingforboys

between the mountains and the valley we built a monument to our regret - eneiryu

cracked the hinges of the cage and waited for you - eneiryu

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okay and finally: since i am a self centered whore

my own fic: an rendition of the # elevator scene

it’s basically my version of post canon if we did get the kiss in the elevator. we got a classic liam pov in which he is has 12/10 for extreme bi diaster energy even whilst being shot at !! so go him ig…

Fuck Off, Fuck This & Fuck It! - nefelibata_peach

Summary: Liam thought to himself heart rate climbing, they were bound to be dead by morning. So he thought with everything but his brain and he kissed him.

Where Liam Dunbar is very confused, slightly traumatized, and just a bit scared but hey, aren't they all! Bad decisions ensue as two boys fight in a war they never did sign up for.

Rating: Teen and Up, Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Chapters: 1/1, Words: 3558 ( 3k )

[mikeshanlon]

i really enjoy the way young royals explores the theme of legacy and how detrimental it can be to have to live up to a legacy or be obsessed with reputation. (analysis and thoughts under the cut)

i think wilhelm resents the fact that he has to live up to the role of being in the royal family and yet is very afraid of ruining that legacy bc of all the pressure. before he was sent off to hillerska he went to a normal school and wanted normal people around him and was content with erik having to take on the responsibilities of crown prince. and when he does have to assume that role he says he can never be erik, that he’s always had to be compared to him and obviously doesn’t like that. but even before erik passed and he had to take on those duties he was afraid of fucking up the legacy of the crown, when he sees that sign in the hallway that says you are in charge of your own legacy after he holds hands with simon, his anxiety worsens. you can tell it’s been instilled in him for a long time that what is most important is the crown’s reputation rather than his own wants. in the scene where him and simon fight about alexander being caught, he obviously wants simon to stay, but he focuses on how him doing drugs will fuck up his family’s reputation if it gets leaked. as much as he cares for simon, his legacy and his duties are like this oppressive cloud hanging over him. 

i do think that wille cares for his family of course but to me it’s different that the sort of loyal unconditional care with simon and his sister/mom. erik and wille had unconditional love, erik understood how difficult being a prince in the public eye was, and wille obviously cared for him deeply and felt like he could to talk to him about issues. his relationship with the queen is much more strained, she wants a tailored, doctored representation of him in the media, he cannot be anxious and bite his nails, she makes all the decisions for him. family is important to wille partially because it has to be bc of how special his family is. he helps his family, he helps august pay his tuition, and then makes a point of disowning august after his betrayal as his new “brother”. but again, because of the royal status and expectations upon the family, that supersedes and colors all of their relationships with each other. it seems to be more a sense of “duty” than unconditional love. especially after erik’s death, wille always has to consider how the crown’s image will be impacted, even though he never wanted to have this responsibility, or even the responsibility of being the “regular” prince under erik. being a family unit that is under constant public scrutiny is going to strain relationships. the queen knows that the anxiety of fucking up his legacy will get to him, and she uses that to get wilhelm to back out of admitting it was him in the video and coming out. wilhelm has to choose between his own happiness and their reputation, is forced to think that denying it’s him in the video is the only way. he loves simon and wanted to live freely, but that pressure of legacy won out.

i don’t know if i think wille necessarily values the crown over his own personal happiness and relationships, like in the way maybe the queen does--i don’t think it comes from a place of “i’m lucky to be prince and owe my duty to the crown, so i do what i have to do to stay that way” (like how the queen said the crown is a privilege not a punishment), but from fear of destroying the legacy and his family. afterall, he still wanted to pursue a secret relationship with simon, i think if he fully valued the crown and uplifting legacy and fulfilling his duties he wouldn’t have tried that. he wouldn’t have made a point to tell simon he loves him. hopefully we get another season because i think with the iconic ending revolution rendition and him looking in the camera, which also parallels the shot of him being forced to apologize/go to hillerska, he is realizing that focusing on legacy is taking away what’s important to him, and he’s going to shake shit up.

august is definitely the most obsessed with legacy, wanting to carry on his father’s business, being persistent on befriending wilhelm and trying to social climb, wanting power and perfection with being prefect, rowing captain etcetera. he is so obsessed with perfection and reputation he gets addicted to drugs, he fucks with simon and makes him get stuff for parties he can’t afford because good parties will make him look better, he manipulates sara multiple times, he mostly wanted felice because of her nobility, he fucking films wilhelm and simon and OUTS him, his own cousin. he hates that wille has everything he wants but isn’t as interested in preserving and more importantly improving the legacy he’s inheriting. meanwhile august’s familial legacy is dwindling, and he holds on to the last bit of assets and names that he can.... v much sick and a weirdo that shows how harmful being obsessed with legacy is

the queen is of course v focused on legacy and it really breaks my heart and makes me angry that she doesn’t care about wilhelm’s happiness more than their reputation, and moreso doesn’t get august in trouble for literally leaking child p*rn of her kid for the sake of appearances?!?!?! like how is he even remotely trustworthy she is wrong for that! like i said earlier the obsession with legacy puts a strain on their mother/son relationship. she doesn’t even really say anything about wille’s sexuality or his relationship, and barely comforts him, mostly goes in with a plan she’s already concocted without him to fix everything. 

erik seemed to understand and accept his role as crown prince but obviously had issues with it as well, like when he makes the plan for him and wilhelm to run from the press, or when he tells wilhelm to enjoy himself while there aren’t so many eyes on him that care. erik shows someone who has more unconditional love and empathy but still has to focus on legacy and is much more inclined to continue his legacy, but we do see those glimpses over how even the most “ideal” attitude of preserving legacy causes issues.

felice is expected to live up to her mother’s legacy, of being an equestrian, of being the lucia, but she doesn’t want either of those things. her mother wants her to be thinner and straighten her hair, and find someone of nobility to be with. obviously she does find wilhelm attractive lol but i think the main reason she pursued him and definitely why she pursued august was because she was expected to social climb and have royal kids. felice feels the need to portray a false narrative of herself on social media to uphold a certain image of herself. it’s very fucked up that her mom wants those values instilled in her but i love that felice was putting up boundaries and pushing back against her mother and the narrative she’s supposed to live up to. her giving sara the role of lucia and focusing on supporting her friends more in the latter half of the season shows growth and i’m excited to see where her story goes. 

sara is interesting because she seems to want to reject the legacy of her family and being working class and to fit in with the elite of hillerska. sara hates micke, hates that simon contacted him because it’s bringing in this “shameful” and painful part of their past (which i mean is def fair). other than sara’s betrayal in 1.06, i think the scene where she tells her family that she wants to reside at hillerska really exemplifies where she’s at in her relation to legacy/class. after dining at hillerska and living amongst the elite she gets annoyed at eating around the TV, she blames her mother for not leaving micke sooner, she gets angry with simon for caring for her. she wants to lead her own life, be popular and wanted because people want her, not for pity (even though i think simon of course truly cares abt his sister she feels annoyed with his protection and care). felice says early on that she thinks sara doesn’t care what other’s think or having friends, and sara says she still wants friends though. i think sara’s biggest thing is she wants to belong, her and simon moved schools after she was bullied for being autistic so i think that definitely affected her even though she tries to act nonchalant about hillerska at first. we see sara’s longing to fit in in smaller ways at first, like her asking her mom for a better piece of her uniform because hers are “cheap” and already worn out. she gets annoyed at simon for chewing loudly, or her mother sitting casually at the table. as she gets closer to felice and madison and all the other students, the allure of the upper class and their lifestyle draws her in more. so much to the point where she gets very anxious and upset at the idea of her and simon leaving hillerska because he’s having his own crisis and doesn’t consider his pov. so much so that she effectively betrays simon and felice, the people she’s closest to, to make a deal (and make out lol) with august to room there and “be just like him”. personally i think sara’s attraction to august is mostly that allure of the elite and that he seemed to “desire” her when he kissed her because he was being a manipulative dickhead--again that want to fit in and be wanted. and  i think there is a really interesting angle of jealousy and competition in female friendships, even if it is really subtle or not intentionally insidious or anything, sara does slowly start to trying to assume all the roles/fashions/mannerisms of felice to live that life she wants. i do think felice and sara’s care for each other is genuine and one of my fave parts of the show, but i think a lot of people who experienced being a teen girl know how we are always pitted against each other even in our subconscious because of how society treats and values women.

simon seems to be the character that is least interested in upholding legacy and tradition or giving a fuck what anyone thinks (as omar said here lmao) and that makes him a really interesting foil to wilhelm. there could be something said about micke fearing that simon is following in his footsteps, but to me that plot more so reveals how the upper class (august) continually exploit the working class for their benefit, and the trappings of generational oppression. the other thing that can be said is simon signing up for private tutoring and rowing, but again i think that serves to further show that he is forced to “play” by the game of the elites because the school/society is corrupt, and also, that simon has further ambitions outside of where he’s at. he wants to get good grades because he wants to explore new places and avenues. to me simon’s biggest motivations are his passions, the things and people he loves--music, his family, wilhelm. he isn’t loyal to others just because he’s expected to be, or uphold a certain image but because he really cares. he doesn’t watch out for sara because that’s his expected role as her brother to do so, but because he cares. he wasn’t interested in knowing wilhelm because he’s a prince like everyone else, he makes it clear he thinks the royal family are privileged and exploitative, but he is interested because he saw the real wilhelm. he’s out and proud even though his elite classmates are more conservative, he doesn’t care about voicing his unpopular opinions, he has no problem walking away from august’s dickhead behavior or calling him out on his shit. simon doesn’t care if people don’t think of him in the best light. (the only exceptions ig are the drugs conflict and the video, though literally anyone would have a problem with that because it’s much deeper that public opinion and has ramifications and is deeply traumatic--but just adding that before someone is like “well actually!”) i also think it’s interesting that most of the songs simon sings has themes of pushing back against the societal norms, and being remembered in history, plus of course the revolution song motif, and how much those songs affect wilhelm, he seems to connect deeply, like he wishes he could do those things but simon is the one who gets to sing them and actually live them.

[organic-guacamole]

episode 209 spoilers below

I'm so late today but here it is

I love EJ, he's finally learning to be happy. I'm so proud.

Ms Jenn = every boomer during zoom calls, like jeez yes we can hear you stop shouting at me.

LOVE THE SUBTLE JOKE ABOUT QUARANTINE "these dark times" "you mean spring break?"

ah yes, remember when we thought covid was just gonna give us a longer spring break? good times

SEBLOS

damn the passive aggressiveness from Carlos and the absolutely over it tone from seb✋

CASWELL COUSINS!!!!! THEY'RE THE BEST!!!!

we needed more if this kind of goofiness for the first part of season 2 that only such an iconic duo can provide.

old old movies-

is it even that old, or is Nini being a gen alpha rn-

i choose to imagine EJ being scared of the movie and hiding in Ashlyn's shoulder while she keeps a straight face and then EJ pretending to be tough afterwards

aww redlyn are soulmates.... yknow, if gingers had souls

(please ignore me)

y'all saw how EJ's face *lit up* when Gina logged on? how dare you tell me he doesn't like her

ofc she's no damsel in distress, she's Gina porter, she's amazing.

so do we think she'd be the type to just glare at suspicious people? or bark at them

do they not know that Rini broke up? or is Ms Jenn just wanting Nini to suffer through her heartbreak to make her a better actress....

speaking of, why is Nini in the call? she's not in the show anymore. Unless she is, even after the rose and the song got cut, which would be so unfair to all those that auditioned properly before she even came back but whatever, she's the main character I get it 🙄

big red is a hero honestly, Nini better thank him for changing the subject like that

I can't-

i won't work you over the break-

this woman would 100% work her kids 24/7 if it was legal and idk how to feel about it.

YES GINA USE THAT CHARM

QUEEN

FRENCH QUEEN

SHE LEARNT FROM THE BEST (antoine obvi)

smh the airport lady, eavesdropping on Gina's call.

The way she was so happy to answer EJ's call, "eej"

I love them your honour.

EJ WITH PAINTED NAILS YES PLEASE

great now we need to see Gina, Ashlyn and EJ having a complete spa day and EJ getting really into it and Gina and Ashlyn take pictures of him when he's laying down in a robe with a mask and cucumbers on his eyes.

finally we get to see Gina's side of portwell

the way she considered it as flirting, this is the sign she asked for in episode 6 come onnnnn

no is Asher/jack really doing tiktok dances in an airport-

Ricky is me. I am burrito.

oh Lynne, sweetie, I'm sorry but the blonde hair is not it

is that even the same lady or-

THE BEAN

THE CHICAGO BEAN

THE BIG OLD METAL BEAN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CITY 😭

jetlag is my go to excuse for anything... I haven't travelled in 2 years.

"welcome to the Lynne and Mike gossip show. where we talk about our depressed son that we both neglect in certain ways! And now a word from our sponsor, Nord VPN..."

SO MANY CANDLES

WHAT DEMON IS LYNNE TRYING TO SUMMON IN HIS ROOM-

is Nina becoming social media obsessed EJ from season 1? AND SHE LIED ABOUT HAVING SONGS TOO PLEASE WHY ARW THEY RECYCLING THE SAME PLOT-

Gina smiling at the picture of her family on Instagram makes me so happy, idek why.

EJ's nails are so pretty, we needed to see it more (unless he had it on for the rest of the episode and I just.... didn't notice🧍����‍♀️)

oh not the tiktok kid✋

yes ma'am end this strange mans whole tiktok career

sir take a hint and leave

GINA NO DONT SAY YOUR LAST NAME HE COULD BE A HUMAN TRAFFICKER

Ricky, walking in style✨

weird kid, ok then Lynne, can't you see he's this close to the edge?

not all your fault baby Ricky, Nini sucks a bit more

RICKY YOU DIDN'T COME DOWN HARD ON THE SONG-

YOU ASKED WHAT IT WAS ABOUT AND SHE SHUT YOU DOWN-

PLEASE DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF

ok but the deleting comment thing was very bad

still don't know if I like Jack honestly

hmmm so Nini's calling herself Nini instead of Nina in her little egg seat, while trying to write a song without inspiration.... Nini, honey, Ricky was your muse, he inspired you to write all those songs, even if it wasn't good for the relationship.

that doesn't mean you gotta get back with him, or that you can't write a song that not about him butttt it'll take some time

the rainbow sticker in her box and her rainbow shirt-

anyways wbk she's not totally straight

Jack are you a criminal?

quick, Gina, check his ankle for a tracker

THE YES AND PRACTICE STRIKES AGAIN

the way Gina wasn't into it in episode 6 but she's used the technique twice now

stole her grandma's Pomeranian-

Jack where the hell did you pull that out from-

the fake crying killed me, that looks like so much fun though

anyone wanna raid a first class lounge with me?

wait so is jack not gonna go in with her?

wouldn't he go in too? help look for the credit card? SO CONFUSED

the first class lounge guy was so into the drama though, watch his face when they start arguing 😭

sorry to break this to you Kourtney, but you haven't even blocked the second act yet soooo...

take that as you will

I love how all of them are totally dissing the dance off

that's the most realistic part of this show tbh

shouldn't Nini have asked how she knew....since the start? why is the fact that her best friend has knowledge of a North high secret now dawning on her...

Howie is sweet honestly, at least he's trying to help. but I stand with Kourtney, don't take him back just because he sang an amazing song, and is giving you a heads up on what's gonna happen...

KOURTNEY IS ME TRYING TO LEAVE AN ONLINE CLASS

I hate school

ooo Nini's writing a song about bad internet connection 🤩🤩🤩

I never lie, except when I do-

son that is the creepiest thing you could say to a stranger that you've been "helping"

2 truths and a lie👀

he's an Ariana fan 100%

called it.

OLDER BROTHER-

WHAT-

free spirit? damn so brother porter was in that horse movie

so has she been kissed or not?????????

I feel like she's moved more than 15 times though so possibly

but then if she's moved so much, and before east high she never opened up to anyone, she's never been kissed then?? damn

same though Gina so let's be besties please

heartbreak president is a great song title idea, give Nini a call rn

but wait

is the no strings attached feeling thing about her telling Ricky she liked him? she thought she was moving away so she thought it'd be no strings attached???

guys I think I figured it out insert the "I've connected two dots" meme

THE DUKE SWEATSHIRT

IS THAT YOUR BOYFRIEND'S

OMG I LOVE I LOVE

NOT THAT I KNOW OF???

ma'am did you just kill me

yes you did

Lynne and Ricky have such a weird relationship

YES IT DID SUCK

TODD SUCKS

LYNNE SUCKS

yeah I get that you wanted Ricky to like Todd BUT THAT WASN'T THE TIME

right so we already know that Ricky was so desperate to keep Nini cuz he didn't want to be like his parents, and now Lynne's talking about this-

Richard needs a long hug

yes Lynne, it is your fault. thank you for finally admitting it.

YES DYE YOUR HAIR

BLOND HIGHLIGHTS RICKY WILL RISE AGAIN

"sometimes the best, last thing you can do for someone you love, is let them go."

gotta admit I teared up at that point

not me thinking big red was calling ms Jenn cupcake for a hot second-

Carlos please omg, you're at the "beach" and they're leaving for the pool?

also, why not just do the call from the hotel room please omg

"don't ask me"

"Carlos"

OMG WHAT HAPPENED

big red wants the tea

O M G

SEB IS JEALOUS

JEALOUS SEBBY IS MY FAVOURITE THING IDC

I'm surprised ms Jenn knew how to give Nini permission to screenshare tbh

So lily's been stalking the East high kids and spending time editing this video while she's supposedly in an immersion trip.... right

EJ and Ashlyn's picture is so chaotic, what even is happening there

"slacking off" bestie its spring break, obviously they're confident enough that they'll get it done in time so why not focus on your own musical.

jealous seb = sassy seb

please what if those guys Carlos is posing with are his cousins or something and that's why he's so confused about Seb

6 YEAR OLD EJ I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM

Nini saying she's obsessed with her ex, that's not weird at all 👍

I can just tell Matt had a blast harassing Julia with those puppets.

Jack please dont be like that, "yet"

chances are you'll never see eachother again 🥰

(honestly sometimes I really miss those friends I made on trips and stuff when we'd spend the day or week together, only to never see them again....those were the good days though)

Ashlyn and Nini should write more songs..... something better than this one at least

Nini: "im good"

cue the Tia Mowry (please I can't spell) crying gif

oh I forgot Ricky was in the show for a hot second

1. where did Gina get to film this without people being around

2. did she just... randomly change her clothes???

ok but the transition between Carlos and EJ

*chefs kiss*

now everyone shut up, EJ's singing

oh i think I'm pregnant

HIS MUSCLES

YES KOURTNEY

I love how big red and Kourtney went from being "the best friends™" to the couple in season 1, to kinda close themselves and having their own plots

sebby makes me so happy

props to biggies editing skills honestly

PORTWELL BEING SIDE TO SIDE I CANT

AND SEBLOS OMG

big red lives for the drama

"wow" so true Ricky

no he is not cute, stop it

"holding" ok that's kinda cute

yeah EJ's a lucky guy😌

jokes aside, it's not that hard to exchange numbers-

keep in touch if you want

ok I really like Jack now

if he comes back in season 3, maybe have him be LGBTQ+ ?

like the only out characters they have rn are Seb and Carlos and they're like the sterotypes, yk?

I'd love to see jack kinda break the mold

Ricky's breaking my heart

that song just hurts

the only thing

now I don't hate Lynne????????

HOW DARE THEY WRITE IN A PROPER REDEMPTION ARC FOR HER

UGH IM SUPPOSED TO HATE HER FOREVER

I mean I don't live her now but she's good

but honestly

"mom can I show you something"

IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL

THE PICTURE AND EVERYTHING OMG

I'm sobbing please help

Gina saying she's just waiting for the right guy and then EJ coming to the airport to pick her up late at night without her asking, offering to bring her back in the morning so she won't have to Uber, bringing her a granola bar (WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE FORGOT TO PACK) and without expecting anything in return???

ms ma'am you've got a keeper right there

her smile at the end was so heartwarming I really can't.

this episode was great.

it felt really short but I liked it, great character development for Ricky, Lynne and Gina.

Cant wait for next episode to see more of EJ being the ideal boyfriend /hj

[onenightbreak]

....so that was a whole deal am i right? excuse any weirdness with this cos i’m kinda shaky rn, but here’s a recap for today’s (24th jan) tales from the smp: The Lost City of Mizu! under the cut smile :] my own interpretations/ things that aren’t explicitly told to be canon/ left to be inferred i’ve marked with italics.

Why show all the skins again when I can let someone else gather them? /j Here’s a post with the skins of all the characters. The cast is Karl, Quackity, BBH, Ranboo, and Dream; playing characters Isaac, Cletus, Benjamin, Charles, and Ranbob, respectively.

The episode starts with the fishermen - Isaac, Cletus, Benjamin, and Charles - setting out on a fishing expedition, before discovering a book that, among other exposition, tells the fishermen the coords of the Lost City of Mizu. Also of note is the fact that the author tells the fishermen that “I [the author] know you [the fishermen] but you don’t know me” and it’s signed with the letter ‘K’, suggesting that c!Karl left the book for them to find. 

Once they arrive at the city, they find a book that calls Mizu “an underwater city of beauty” and that they can “get up close and personal with all your favorite characters from the Disc Wars”. They enter the city and meet a person who identifies themself as Ranbob, who later adds that he is a descendent of Ranboo. Despite being a descendent of Ranboo, Ranbob’s appearance  differs from his ancestor’s. While Ranbob has both the black enderman skin and the white other-half skin, the arrangement is different, and he has yellow and purple eyes instead of Ranboo’s green and red ones. Endermen used to have green eyes before they were purple, so perhaps it’s related to that? Ranbob tells the fisherman that Mizu has been “abandoned for so long, other than me”, but that he wasn’t around when it was built. During most of the episode, he acts as a tour guide of sorts, showing around the fishermen. 

The rooms they visit are themed around the different people involved in the current day DSMP storyline, however many things are incorrect suggesting things got misremembered or changed over time. According to Mizu’s history:

George was the longest lasting king of the SMP and worshipped by his followers. However, Eret killed him, as they were a tyrant who tried to take over. 

Ranboo and his bloodline were bookkeepers and scholars. Ranboo in particular, was one of the greatest scholars, due to his supreme memory and writing everything down. He is also said to have chosen the side of a traitor due to his not choosing a side.

Sapnap was a fierce warrior on the Dream SMP. He had a large love for pets, and started the Pet War over defending them. He was also said to be so strong he could bench press mountains. Sapnap has a larger than usual bed due to his many women. (and historians said that him Karl and quackity were just very close friends /j)

Mizu is uncertain if Fundy was a person or a pet, with some people seeing him as a great warrior and some seeing him as Tommy’s pet (i hate it here i hate it here i hate-).

Quackity is very “happy-go-lucky even though there are so many bad things happening around him”. He was a well known bard, a “prolific nudist”, pulled many pranks, and idolised Skeppy. Quackity was also known for being “hyper optimistic”, apparently because he was so dumb he didn’t realise the bad things happening around him.

Skeppy had some kind of diamond poisoning that made him blue, but he sometimes changed colors to red or yellow. He was also known to be best friends with BBH, “if a little obsessed with him”.

BBH was known for prolific cursing and casting spells on people, including the enchantment “lan-gu-age” which prevented the target from speaking. He also apparently had excessive amounts of porn on his hard drive, but I think this is just a(n unfunny) joke from Dream and so I will simply Pretend I Do Not See.

Attached to BBH’s room is a secret room with green and purple carpets and beds, lots of books, and a picture of the cartoon Kids Next Door. Mizu’s scholars don’t know who this character is but it seems likely to be Karl, with confusion about him due to his time travelling.

Tubbo and Tommy share a room, with Tubbo known to be the leader and strongest of the Manberg warriors and Tommy his most loyal ally and follower. Tubbo is also known to like nature and particularly bees (which Mizu thinks you eat?). Tommy is known to “have a problem worshipping discs”, but the discs shown are Cat on the ceiling and 13 above the bed.

During their exploration, they also find several books with hints pointing to how Mizu’s residents met their downfall, including poisoned soil, decreasing food supplies, air filtration and oxygen problems, lacking energy production, and “strange sightings around the east wing”. Additionally, one of the walls is broken and Ranbob patches it up with TNT, as that’s “the only block he had to clog it”.

The last place Ranbob leads the group to is the Tree Dome, which contains a large custom tree, swings, and a bench with jukebox. Ranbob disappears, and the fishermen find a secret room key. The also spot a chest at the very top of the tree, and cc!Karl opens an audience poll to decide who climbs the tree, the result of which is Cletus. He climbs the tree to the the chest before Ranbob reappears and sets the tree on fire, saying that “no one lives after coming [to the city]”, and blows up the tree, killing Cletus. The other 3 fishermen make it out and hide in Skeppy’s room to read the book dropped by Cletus. The book says that the secret room key lock(?) is hidden in the main hall, and confirms Ranbob’s message that “once in the City of Mizu, there is no escape”.

They find the secret room, which contains a lava parkour leading to a key to unlock another door on the other side of the room. The audience votes again, deciding that Benjamin should attempt the parkour, which of course he falls off of and dies. Isaac successfully completes the parkour and brings back the final room key. (if you aren’t afraid of that wording, you really should be)

The final room is Dream’s room, with several sets of diamond armor, a diorama of Dream, and a ellipse pattern on the wall that resembles Blocks. Ranbob reappears and tells the Isaac and Charles that everyone in Mizu had an idol that they worshipped, and that his was Dream. Isaac asks if Dream was a good man, to which Ranbob says that he was. Ranbob tells them a final time that “nobody leaves” Mizu, before killing them both.

The stream cuts to black and plays a remix of Dearly Beloved while cc!Karl changes his skin and changes the set. When the stream shows again, the stream is focused on c!Karl. He walks through a cave to a room decorated with a purple and green carpet, and books and posters for the Tales episodes of Legends of Gogtopia and The Village that Went Mad, however is missing the poster from the Beach Episode. c!Karl writes a book that recaps in blurb form the events of The Lost City of Mizu, labels it as such and places it under the relevant poster. He also writes a diary entry which is labeled “Diary entry #1”, which mentions that he remembers less every time he time travels, however that he “has to keep doing [his] part” to “right some wrongs”. He ends it with “dont forget who you are” and signs it “Diary #1”. c!Karl then goes outside and goes into F5, showing that the colors on the front of his hoodie are reversed; a purple spiral on green background, rather than the reverse that is it normally. cc!Karl cuts to black again, lets the music finish, then ends stream.

(then i spend the next 10 minutes freaking out abt it, cos wtf was that that was so good-)

[redxblueihateloveyou]

spill the yoi hot takes :o

I’m really flattered with the amount of asks (I hope you won't mind that I combined at least 5, it's just easier this way), interested in my yoi opinions, I wasn’t planning to get into that honestly, until I mentioned it to my friend Alex (I’ve mentioned him here before without a name tho, he’s gay, he’s very into anime, he was also the one behind that 4am text “but how do u think Rin’s teeth feel on Haru’s dick” lol). 

I just didn't want to rewatch it, as I've said before, but something he said got me very intrigued and last week ended up with me staying until 7am for a virtual watch party that got pretty hilarious, but not for the yoi reasons lol.

So just know that to be completely fair we did it and I'm saying everything below with a very fresh impression, which hasn't changed really bc like I'm 25, I was watching it the first time when I was 21, not 14 xD. I think it got worse actually.

Once again, I know that since they’re both gay sports animes comparisons are inevitable, but to me one has nothing to do with the other and no matter the fact that I adore Free! and don’t like YOI, I don’t want to throw words like smth is “superior” out there, bc I don’t want to be like those YOI fans back in the days, who thought that none other gay ships should exist after this (unless they say smth specifically for me to counterattack, then I can say whatever lol).

Like if you love stories like this, it’s okay. Like what you like. But to yell at everybody that they must think that this is how relationships should be and trash every other gay ship in existence, you maybe should not, especially when you don’t really have much to be proud of. Just like kisses don’t make a love story high-quality, full censorship doesn’t take away a good love story.

"Heaven official’s blessing” is also censored, but no matter how much you censor it, their love for each other is seen in their actions so clear, that it is in fact will not take anything away from the power of their feelings and the greatness of their love story if at the end they won’t show them kissing. Just like if I kiss a random stranger on the street, it won’t make us the best couple in the world.

Now I went into watching YOI unbiased the 1st time I watched it (I did watch it after Free, bc it was in “recommended”). I did not expect it to be “like Free”, I just wanted smth that’ll give me the same kind of emotion, investment in the story, ship, etc. It didn’t, so I just moved on.

I didn’t even think deep about why. I thought I just grew out of the “Cinderella” stories a long time ago or as it was here not very gracefully called “how to turn the pig into the prince”.

Like if you want the “she’s all that” but with the boy instead of a girl, you’ll probably enjoy YOI. But once again, love stories I enjoy are the opposite of those. It's really nothing bad, if you enjoy the stuff like “Someday my prince will come” in whatever age tbh, but I since a certain age just wasn’t invested in those anymore and began to obsess with stories like “Anastasia” instead, and I’m talking about love stories with less naivety in between and feelings out of nowhere, but more stuff like “yes, bitch, I find you attractive, true, but whether I fall for you unconditionally or not, only real life situations will tell later on”.

And I don’t mean stuff like going through war together or some epic journey, but grown ups must know those. Those life situations or even tiny things someone do, that make you not only fall for someone, but think “yeah, I can imagine my life with you”.

Like in my humble opinion, you can’t fall in love with someone bc of the way they swim or skate, for example. What ppl call “love at first sight” is in fact “attraction at first sight”. So yes, we do joke about Rin falling in love at first sight, bc he did in fact walked into the hall, saw Haru and was like “dat bitch is so fine”, even tho he was just standing there, but once again, he was just attracted to him. What happens after this is you can go on a whole beautiful journey with tiny Rin putting together the prettiest puzzle of why he falls for Nanase Haruka. In such little things like when Haru slowed down when he saw Nagisa feeling bad during running and Rin was like “omg you’re so uwu”, how he mentions that he always helps ppl, but never asks for help himself, he slowly gradually paints a picture of what kind of person Haru is, same goes for Haru about Rin. And then you have a whole story of them falling for each other all over again when they’re already adults, and you again watch it through their eyes, and once again I’m not in fact talking about some grand gestures like 1x12, I’m talking about stuff like them focusing on Haru’s eyes shaking, when he saw that Rin secretly helps Rei to learn how to swim. It’s the little things, that you watch and you get why they feel what they feel for each other. And that also makes you fall in love more with their characters by seeing how the other sees them.

YOI doesn’t have those moments. Not only they weren’t in any situations that would make them know each other for who they really are, they hardly even know the basic info about one another. Hell, the viewer doesn’t know anything about them. And this is why to me it goes into the category of those typical romcoms I can’t get invested in.

So I don’t think these two can be compared. And while some yell “bc you’re not canon, but yoi is canon”, I think they can’t be compared for another reason. Bc some ppl are trying to prove to me that a 27 years old man fell head over heels in love with someone overnight during a drunk banquet, then watched a vid of him skating and flew to another country and hey “if you win a gold medal, lets get married”. This is not the kind of relationship progression I’m looking for like at all. Between that time he started training him and their “censored kiss” there was nothing and I mean nothing that’d made me go “yeah, I see why he loves him”.

But anyways, lets live piecefully really, you can like one, you can like both, it’s all okay.

Like I know many have ptsd and it’s true that back when YOI was popular, most of their fans for real did annoy to death almost everyone, bc they yelled that No.6 is trash, when someone said “but you’re not the only one gay story that’s not based on sex”. They yelled that Free! has no right to exist bc its queerbating (LOL). By that time, I’m not gonna lie I was ready to poke my eyes out each time I saw smth YOI related, bc it was like: you make a multigay shipping vid -  “how dare u not include YOI”, you make a gifset - “you forgot YOI” like I HAD TO like it just bc it’s gay. There is no such rule to me. Just like I don’t care for some hetero romances, I don’t care for some gay romances. Simple is that. Once again gay has nothing to do with the relationships dynamic and the story.

Yeah, comments about fanservice. Like why should I watch Victor’s naked ass for several minutes every episode, but don’t get to see Haru or Rin’s at least once? So salty rn.

Free is more fanservice-y.. well, it’s hella fanservicy, yes, but like we can’t swim in shirts, you can tho not show naked ass in each episode, I thought you were skating. 

See, it’s all debatable.

But I do wish ppl stop putting yoi relationships on a piedestal, their relationship are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too far from being inspirational for many and not even close to the what love is in my opinion. If you seek smth of a very high standart of gay love, choose MDZS for example, idk. But don’t throw YOI at ppls faces as a “this is how should be”. Not everyone wants that.

I don’t need a half-assed engagement and esp the censored kiss (like either do it or don’t do it at all honestly). Also stuff like this should carry weight. I don’t want things for the sake of things.

Like to me Rin’s “the only thing that hasn’t changed in my life is how I feel about you” speech, considering the fact that he felt like that throughout all those years, means hella more, than this. 

I think 1stly, it’s because of the “it’s like it was a destiny xD” factor and 2ndly, bc at least this scene gives a little more sense to the fact that he flew to another country to train him. Now it’s if “I fell MADLY in love in one drunk night and was pining my whole life after that and that vid was a sign for me to go see you again” makes any sense to you. At least that’s how some fans read it.

Once again it might be a good thing for a passable one-time romantic comedy. But plots and pairings like this is what made me turn to anime in the first place, so.. sorry lol.

All this mega tragic posts of “Victor was soooo in love for such long time, it’s so sad” made me laugh so hard. Like he feel in love so hard during a one drunk banquet with a guy who was so drunk he didn’t remember anything he did? WHY? HOW? what could he possibly do to make him fall that hard, no one knows. Like to me the only reason u can fall for someone in one night is if you saw him risking his life saving a kitten or a puppy from a car or smth.

I’m just not the kind of person who thinks you can fall for someone for no reasons. Again, you can find someone attractive and go from there, but there must be things along the way that will make me believe in the progression of it. It can of course all come in the future, but the story was what the story was. Whatever you are trying to add to it is already a fanfiction.

YOI is not boring per se, bc everything goes way too fast and sometimes with no reasoning, so I was more surprised that “this was it?” lmao. But their relationships are dull, yes. Bc there is nothing to even discuss really, you can only assume things, bc the whole thing didn’t give u much, esp in the characters department. It’s just really funny to me that someone would write a whole post of “I love this character bc I presume he’s like that”, usually it’s “I love this character bc facts, facts, facts”.

______

Now back to the beginning of my post and to the funny story that happened. We were randomly discussing shit, when I mentioned about possibly rewatching YOI, bc I didn’t want to start talking about smth in case I forgot some stuff (I didn’t btw lol) and turned out that he freaking disliked it a lot. I never even asked, for some reason, and we’ve been yelling about Free! and other stuff for ages and like his boyfriend is in love with Sousuke and they both adore rinharu to death.

And he has lots of gay friends who love Free (this made me happy the most, btw during our YOI chat I asked and it was 4:1 harurin:rinharu haha I win) and some ships from Haikyuu too, but turns out that literally none of them were into YOI. And the funniest thing he said was “bc it felt more heterosexual than some heterosexual stories I’ve watched”. Now I don’t know if it would make sense to anyone else out there, but I kinda did get what he meant.

I asked if it was bc of the “fairytale setting” and the fact that no one cared that they’re gay (bc “in front of the stadium?!” was the reaction, when I told them “there was a cencored kiss here” (btw not everyone got it lolz) and then “did they just write the story with a girl, but then changed it by the end?”), but they said “no, just the overall feeling”.

And like everyone knows that YOI targeted audience is hetero girls. It wasn’t made for the sake of the LGBT community and none of the homophobic ppl will watch it either, no matter what some think. So for whom they did it the way they did it is very questionable tbh. They say it’s the LGBT representation in anime, and yes, good, great, always happy about, but isn’t it kinda funny that some of LGBT representatives don’t even feel like it apparently.

Now I’m just saying some, I’ve asked him to ask around out of curiousity, and it was only 11 gay guys in total, who watched it, including our company and his bf who was forced into it haha, but 11 is quite a lot, considering the fact that not even 1 liked it. But then somehow stuff like MDZS and even uncanonical mikayuu was highly appreciated and loved, bc it accidentally made a dent in some extra conservative parents and dull ppl.

It’s just much more interesting to hear what guys who are actually dating guys think about all those kind of animes and ships, than some girls here who yell at me stuff like “why are you supporting queerbating”. Btw I asked Alex if he’s offended by that, he said “no, but we for real think they’re doing it” lmao.

It is supposed to be funny. You didn’t get it wrong. But if you saw many ppl would aggressively disagree with you. I just thought that “analysis” was an “interpretive process that draws conclusions from a set of facts”, not “writing a fanfiction based on assumptions”, but then again to each their own. 

The problem is that I don’t even get what’s cute about it, it’s just absurd to me. Like it’s pulled out of an ass, for real. They’re not in the stage of a relationships, when I would find such thing romantic. And all the agressive denying of the fact that it was indeed wedding rings made this scene cringy, too. The whole thing is cringy to me idk. The “win the gold, only then we’ll get married”.... It all gave me a weird feeling. The opposite of “touching”.

So in conclusion, when you skip most of the important parts of the love story and jump into stuff just for the sake of it, then also make fun of it, it leaves a hella weird impression and aparently not just to me.

And once again trying to market some primitive story as an epic love story, just bc it’s gay is extremely weird to me. If you make 50 shades of grey gay, it’s not gonna suddenly become a pulitzer prize winning kind of book, it’ll stay the same dumb af story with dumb af characters, but gay.

So being happy about some representation (and btw they still managed to add stuff like “its not gay if you exchange rings with your hommies” here and there and make it “hahahaha joking”), I get it, but to say that this what all the gay ships should aim for, pls stop. We really don’t wanna. Sincerelly. 

We here stick to a motto “I can picture the kiss of the characters whose story is so amazing, that the kiss is the only thing missing, but if I basically have just a picture of two guys kissing, I won’t write a whole story myself.”

P.S. I will forever laugh now tho at the fact that calling your bf a “pig” and being an arogant asshole without any canonically established reasonings is a great relationships, but Adam with his past gets what he gets now for the “dog” comments even tho his bf enjoys it lmao like I did not remember this bits in YOI. I honestly thought it was like completely “unproblematic” one, but it’s like hilariously not. So what ppl are trying to even put out their as a “pinnacle of the lgbt representation” as you say, like there are for real older yaois that are much better than this.

[eldritch-elrics]

svsss: the (not so) grand return of peerless cucumber

so a LOT happened in the chapters i read last night (44-49) and i have. SO many thoughts

not as many as i had right after i read but i really had to go to bed so i couldn’t write them all up.....

i put some reactions in individual posts but i’ll repeat them here!

first of all. shang qinghua. fucked off to the demon realm. like, good for him? but also. i want to see my boy

binghe keeping sqq’s body??? xue yang vibes OFF the charts

so I’M IN LOVE WITH THE MUSHROOM PLOT

i love how every so often sv will hit me with a twist that is SO up my alley that i just. lose it a little bit

HE MADE HIMSELF A CLONE BODY OUT OF MAGICAL MUSHROOMS AND TRANSPORTED HIS SOUL INTO IT.

i love mushroom shit and i love bodyswapping and. my god.

the fact that sqq has died twice and been forced to inhabit 3 different bodies??? wei wuxian wishes he were this cool

sidenote but the mental image of sqq doing radio calisthenics in the forest is really funny. or maybe it’s just funny to me because of the associations i have with this one time in japanese class?

sqq’s new body looking like a cross between shen yuan and shen qingqiu is really interesting and perhaps... symbolic....?

also hey does this mean he doesn’t have to deal with the cureless poison anymore. i assumed that it would be cured in his eventual sexytimes with binghe but hmmm i guess not!

the point where i really lost it was when he realized he was disconnected from the system. i know now that it wasn’t permanent but that was just so interesting, how much he hates it and wants it gone. which makes sense! even though it has helped him get out of bad spots at times, it’s a sign that he’s not really from this world. now i’m just really curious what’s gonna happen to the system at the end of the novel. maybe it’ll shut off once he achieves the “goal” it’s seemed to have set for him and gets together with lbh?

also i’m glad that sqq seems to have matured a little bit in terms of his people skills / problem solving skills? though uh. remains to be seen how he’ll act in front of binghe when binghe realizes who he is

it also seems like i was completely wrong about sqq’s motivations for sacrificing himself lol. lot more selfish than i thought? but it makes sense! fun twist

mxtx sure likes to have her protagonists execute plots that they don’t tell the reader about until after they happen lol (i’m thinking of the golden core transfer)

uhh back to plot reactions

love the running joke about peerless cucumber. also the demon names... six balls <3

also hold on a minute, peerless cucumber is a dick joke? lmao

thank you airplane for making it clear binghe has a big dick. absolutely vital character information

so i’ve said this before but sqq’s narration really CARRIES this novel. here i’m thinking specifically about his diatribe against sha hualing’s nails

shl is pretty fun. sexy evil lady!

sqq can turn his fan into a blade. nie huaisang get ON that smh

yang yixuan my beloved!

also HAHA i predicted that sqq’s super mushroom powers could help the xin mo thing and i was RIGHT

so sqq is just. SO invested in getting the plot back on track. like with all the harem members and stuff. it’s so funny because like bro. surely you’ve noticed by now that things are going very differently than in pidw. and also... you don’t WANT to go back on the pidw track bc that would kill you!!!

so the system reactivates when binghe turns up right? i am thinking about. the fact that when it tries to reboot it’s like “contacting customer service”

WHO IS CUSTOMER SERVICE.

it’s so interesting because like... obviously the whole system thing is so much bigger than just A Book? it’s even got airplane trapped inside it. and he’s the fucking author! who is running this thing? and for what purpose?

sqq listening in on the gossip about how lbh is DEFINITELY obsessively in love with him was SO funny. poor man

so binghe. he has become so COLD

i don’t like it :(

once more. my dude go to therapy.

wait also random but sqq has a beard now and for some reason that’s so funny to me

life at the palace seems terrible lmao no one is doing ok

smh, mxtx protags keep dying and staying dead for huge amounts of time and then coming back in different bodies

the fact that binghe’s happiest memories are training with sqq :(

THE FACT THAT BINGHE IS ABSOLUTELY SHIT AT KISSING

my god. that entire scene

went from “awwww headpats” to “AAAAAAAA”

the fact that the system congratulates him i’m sjkdhgjhsdhgjsds poor sqq.... didn’t ask for this shit.......

after 50 chapters, he’s finally realized he turned the male lead gay <3 say goodbye to all those funny oblivious moments!

i had to stop there because it was way too late at night but wow. we shall see how this relationship progresses

i can’t see it improving anytime soon but at least sqq knows lbh likes him now???

i had a LOT of thoughts last night but now i’m pretty much just like. i really need to see where it goes before i make any judgements on bingqiu

rn i’m not a big fan because 1. sqq is so wildly uncomfortable (understandable lol, even if lbh thinks it’s just a dream) and 2. lbh is very obsessive and that’s not really my favorite trope. but like it’s obviously not meant to be a healthy relationship, at least definitely not right now, and i do like some good fucked up romance! i’m excited to see the developments where sqq realizes what his real feelings are

i’m also fairly neutral on binghe as a character atm. his main personality traits seem to be “obsessed with sqq” and “trying not to die from evil sword qi poisoning” and i don’t find that all that compelling? between him and lwj i have to say that mxtx’s love interest characters are not really my favorite, though i wouldn’t say i dislike either of them.

furthermore i’m slightly concerned with how lbh’s “i’m the main character and i get what i want” attitude is gonna affect the romance. i know there’s some dubconny stuff later which i can’t say i’m excited for but i am excited to see how binghe’s character is gonna develop in general

my aspirations for bingqiu is that they’re both able to eventually break free of the expectations of the system

because, look at this from sqq’s pov. there’s this ai in your head that has, for literal years, been steering you towards a romance that you (at least outwardly) don’t want. isn’t that fucking terrifying? i love it. the system (at least how i see it) has been bending the established plot of the world in order to make this happen. it’s like fate but you can see the gears turning.

and even if sqq does end up liking lbh back, can you imagine the existential crisis of like. wondering if he really CHOSE to get with binghe or if he was somehow compelled to by the system which acts based on binghe’s emotions?

i think that would be so interesting

however what i think is Actually going to happen (based on that one time when airplane was like “hey cucumber, uh, is lbh just a character to you or is there more...”) is that sqq is gonna realize that he’s had a bit of a crush on binghe since reading pidw and is only just now dealing with his internalized homophobia. so him getting together with binghe has less strings attached

i think there’s some opportunity here for a commentary on the soulmate trope? because svsss is just so steeped in themes about agency and fate. i think that would be really cool but we’ll have to see. i feel like the ending is gonna be simpler and happier than i want it to be but obviously i cannot make any judgements yet! i’m just having Thoughts :)

so, i also read one of the extras (the one where he goes with lqg to battle succubi) because the translation i’m reading recommended it! it was pretty fun

sqq SO clueless. like i get it, he doesn’t think he’s into anything other than Pretty Cis Women, but. sqq we’ll work on this

also ASKING LQG IF HE’S A VIRGIN. sqq literally stop

(that was so funny though)

liu qingge ACE RIGHTS

actually lqg’s outburst in this chapter was kind of bizarre and can be explained in a few different ways i think?

i really like the idea of him being aroace. thinks true love doesn’t exist etc

i feel like the intended implication of lqg’s outburst is that he’s realized madame meiyin is referring to binghe and is like “holy shit no sqq can’t be with Him”

maybe lqg is just homophobic?

but i. also kind of wonder if lqg is gay and in love with sqq? and is just putting up the “such deep love doesn’t exist” thing because he really doesn’t want sqq to know

there was that whole line where the succubus was like “well you’re not his soulmate you don’t know” and it made me think

on the other hand i can’t really see lqg liking sqq that way; they seem to have more of a Bro Bond

then again lqg does keep fighting binghe for sqq’s sake

either headcanon is fun! i’d be excited for more insight into lqg in general i think

[strvngcrs]

『 adam brody. forty. cis male. he/him. 』 oh heavens, is that DANIEL ABRAMS from FAIR LANE i see roaming around mapleview? minnie may’s always calling them -BROODING & -EVASIVE. i happen to think they’re not that bad! they’re a pretty cool HORROR AUTHOR and every time i’ve seen them, they’ve always been +DEBONAIR & +ELOQUENT. i hope i see them around again! 

classically rolls in ridiculously late bc i forgot i had to work last night & then proceeded to sleep in today wooo !!  good afternoon ghouls, it’s ya girl maia, finally here to deliver the definition of hot mess with good intentions.

GENERAL

FULL NAME.    daniel elijah abrams.

NICKNAMES.    dan, danny.

AGE & BIRTHDATE.    40 years old ; may 4, 1980.

GENDER & PRONOUNS.    cis male ; he/him.

ORIENTATION.    heterosexual.

MARITAL STATUS.    estranged.

RELIGION.    jewish ( non-practicing ).

OCCUPATION.    horror author.

INSPIRATION.     bill denbrough ( it ), donnie darko ( donnie darko ), lucas scott ( one tree hill ), stephen king.

PHYSICAL

HAIR COLOUR.    black.

EYE COLOUR.    dark brown.

BUILD.    athletic.

MARKS.     freckles scarcely spread across his entire body.

TATTOOS.    none.

PIERCINGS.    none.

HEIGHT.    5'11".

FACECLAIM.    adam brody.

PERSONALITY

ZODIAC.    taurus.

ALIGNMENT.    chaotic neutral.

HOGWARTS.    ravenclaw.

LABEL.    the arcane.

POSITIVE TRAITS.    cheeky, debonair, driven, eloquent, resilient, solicitous.

NEGATIVE TRAITS.    brooding, evasive, inquisitive, sarcastic, stoic, stubborn.

HOBBIES.    smokes like a chimney while writing until he forgets what day of the week it is, dabbles in hunting & fishing (thanks @ his dad), labels all crime / thriller genres as ‘predictable’ but continues to watch them, obsesses over & relentlessly criticizes his own work, drinks heavily & passionately plays moonlight sonata or fur elise as if he’s betoven’s disciple.

BACKGROUND

PLACE OF BIRTH.    california.

CURRENT RESIDENCE.    mapleview, north carolina.

NATIONALITY.    american.

ETHNICITY.    ashkenazi jewish.

PARENTS.   judith miller & mr abrams.

SIBLINGS.    mia miller.

BIRTH ORDER.    eldest.

CHILDREN.    penelope abrams.

EDUCATION.     university of california, los angeles; bachelor of arts in english.

LANGUAGES.    english, some spanish & french.

HISTORY

EARLY LIFE.    born to THE judith miller and some newspaper editor, daniel was raised by the latter and notoriously abandoned by the former. well, not completely abandoned - there’s an old shoebox containing a few letters as proof - but that was the only source of communication in their otherwise absent relationship. while little danny boy didn’t fully understand why he couldn’t see his mother, he sought out an alternative solution by watching her movies. his father wasn’t aware, at first, and dan created this extravagant fantasy of the person he thought she was based on the roles she played. however, once papa abrams found out his son was watching these movies (which were probably not fit for children in the first place lmao oop), he begrudgingly revealed the bitter truth. being forced to come to terms with the fact that his own mother willingly abandoned him with his father, daniel didn’t fully understand what it meant; he couldn’t properly process why. the hurt of absent mother was expressed more out of anger, feeling as though there must have been something wrong with him. there were fewer and fewer letters sent to judith until he gave up altogether and thus, dan’s out of control behavior was born.

TEENAGE FEVER.    SUICIDE MENTION TW.  he struggled in school. his emotions betrayed him. instead of relishing a happy childhood, daniel found himself pushing everyone away, getting into fights, sneaking out late at night to run around the city streets with his friends and get into all sorts of trouble with them. he couldn’t count on his hands how many times the police picked him up and brought him to his dad’s doorstep. it only got worse once one of his best friends was found dead, written off as a suicide, though it didn’t add up in dan’s eyes and seemed so much more sinister. the young man was nearly deemed to be a lost cause, until he discovered his passion for writing. 

                                  language arts or literature was the last thing anyone would ever think to group with daniel abrams. but his english teacher noticed how well he could articulate his thoughts and feelings on paper, and submitted one of his pieces to a writing contest, which earned dan the win and a cash prize. bewildered by a talent he hadn’t even realized was in him, daniel embraced it. he started writing in a journal ( which he kept safely tucked away beneath the mattress of his bed ), documenting every feeling and thought as a way to express his emotions in a more productive manner. this talent earned him a full ride scholarship to ucla with a major in literature and plans of diving into some sort or creative writing career or perhaps becoming an english teacher, to follow in the footsteps of his high school teacher who he came to idolize.

                                  mere days into his freshman year, however, his high school sweetheart showed up in the middle of the night at his dorm with a positive pregnancy test. it was then the chaotic world as he knew it turned a new leaf, revealing a silver lining in the form of their daughter, penelope, who daniel hadn’t a clue, just yet, would save him. and so a shotgun wedding was quickly planned around the pair, both families either completely supportive or in utter disbelief. it was quick, it was cheap(ish), and it was stressful as all heck. but they were young, and in love, and were looking forward to starting a family together, despite it being a little earlier than initially planned.

“ADULT”HOOD.    fast forward five years, and they’re signing divorce papers. fortunately, it wasn’t messy. the two had simply grown apart as they matured in their respective ways, and remaining together was only causing a rift to develop between the two. the last thing they wanted, for the sake of their daughter, was built up resentment to tear the little family apart. his wife, who daniel initially thought to be the love of his life, blossomed into an absolute goddess; she was ambitious and knew exactly what she wanted. daniel, on the other hand, was still somewhat caught up in his ‘bad boy’ habits of drinking excessively and his career was still pretty up in the air. the two just didn’t compliment each others’ lifestyles anymore.

                                   daniel moved out but remained in california, settling for a bachelor’s apartment where he was able to have penelope every weekend. during this time, he finally cracked down and worked on finishing a novel he’d started years prior. within a year, he found a publisher who took interest in his grotesque works, and by the time daniel was twenty seven, his first bestseller hit the shelves, changing his life for the better with the ability to provide for his daughter without stress of landing another odd job ever again.

                                   as his fame increased, so did his desire to slink back into the shadows away from the limelight. at first, he enjoyed the wholesome book signings by day and grungy celebratory benders by night. but it grew old pretty fast and he certainly didn’t want to end up as another washed up shmuck. so, on a whim, daniel decided to move out of california completely, removing himself from the toxic lifestyle he’d grown accustomed to and shacking up on a beautiful piece of land in the rocky mountains of north carolina. the serenity and scenery certainly aided in his inspiration, as well as his unacknowledged lowkey addictions slowly being rehabilitated from his bloodstream.

OLD YELLER.    now, in his utmost prime at forty years old, he’s written numerous cult classics, a few of which have successful movie adaptations. he was lucky enough to land himself in a second marriage, though.... that one is now deteriorating as well because he literally doesn’t know how to maintain a healthy relationship. he received full custody of his daughter when she was sixteen, under the unfortunate circumstance of her mother’s untimely death. although they’d been separated for nearly twenty years, daniel was still very much affected by the loss, more so empathetically for penelope. he’s still hooked on the drink, though he’s definitely calmed down quite a bit from when he was a young buck. basically a messy, depressy old soul who uses sarcasm to deflect his true feelings.

CONNECTIONS

ESTRANGED WIFE.    first marriage was a bust, and the second is turning out to be no better. they haven’t hit rock bottom just yet, in his opinion (which would be finalizing a divorce lmao), and he’s unsure if they should work things out or not but also really.......doesn’t wanna go through the process of another divorce. plus he likes her and deep down adores their bickering. the reason(s) why things started falling apart between them can be discussed of course. lowkey debating on whippin this up as a big official wc but.... if anybody already here would like to snag it, i would 100% mclove it.

COLLABORATORS.    literally anyone he’s worked with over the years, whether they be fellow authors, publishers/publicists, journalists, screenplay writers, etc. yeehooo the possibilities are endless !!

FOLLOWERS.    anyone hooked on his books, whether devout fans from his early beginnings or people who newly discovered his fictional writings.

FORMER CLASSMATES.    could be from high school or university, but he was in california for the better part of his life aka not a mapleview native. former friends to foes & anything in between. dan’s that one kid who spiked the punch bowl at all the dances and years later probably snuck in party favors to snort off the bathroom sink during their high school reunion lmao whew !!

ANYTHING.    literally anything. i’m my groggy state of mind on my lack of creativity rn so please, i’m beggin. if daniel can enrich your characters’ lives in any way, shape, or form, hit me up and we’ll hatch a plan.

[aplaceforthesoul]

Anonymous submitted:

23/f This is just going to a pointless rant, if you don’t mind. I think I messed up. The problem isn’t that I messed up, but the fact that idk how to fix it or what to do next. I had an argument with my boyfriend over something REALLY dumb and decided to be petty and stay mad. I became very cold. He tried to reason with me but I didn’t budge. Worst part is that idek why I am upset in the first place. It was completely an irrational feeling I acted on. And I think it’s one of my toxic traits, just being stubborn and not acting on my emotions without completely understanding them an just being very immature sometimes. There are times when I really can’t help it, but this time I could, I was self aware enough. For context, my friend and I were arguing(casually) about this character from a show we both obsess over, we both “wanted” him. Then she brought my boyfriend in to settle the score because he’s really a fair person. He suggested a coin toss and she won. Well I won’t say that’s the reason I’m THIS upset but it definitely was a trigger. I know I’m being really irrational rn. I think I’m just being a sore loser. Well yea, I got very mad at my boyfriend, I guess for being fair. Idk? I’m not sure what I’m upset about. It took a while for him to figure out how mad I actually am, and it kind of annoyed him, obviously. Idk what I want! Why am I so upset? It’s not like I want to actually be with a fictional character, I’m not that obsessed? Plus, it’s not even like I’ve been obsessed with the character for years or anything, literally just a few weeks?  And either the argument wasn’t even a serious one, we’re just fooling around. But for some reason, when I think of my boyfriend now, I just get upset. Am I that much of a sore loser? But I’m not mad at my friend. What am I sad about?! And I’ve done stuff like this before, that’s why he’s annoyed. I get that it can be exhausting. I haven’t been so immature in a while so I thought I’ve gotten better :/ Do I want special treatment? Well I get enough special treatment from him otherwise, can’t expect it all the time. Lol, I literally feel like the devil and the angel in me are arguing rn. God, I just don’t know how to fix this, I’m contradicting myself. How do I get out this constant irrationality? 

hey friend <3 I’ve done this a few times, not with my partner but with friends/family so I can relate a bit! it’s a pretty conflicting and contradictory way to feel, I agree. on the surface it may have felt like pettiness, possibly on a deeper subconscious level it felt a little like betrayal? hence reacting the way you did. it’s all connected with pride and the ego though, and it’s something start to learn to let go of. 

I know I’m answering this a while after you sent it, so I hope things are ok between you and your boyfriend now :* for the future though, if this happens again? say to your boyfriend that you love him lots but you just need a few hrs space to work through the anger. let him know that it’s not about him, that he truly hasn’t done anything wrong, you just need a bit of time to process emotions and to let go of them. communication is key!! and if he knows why you need space and not that you’re not randomly ignoring him, and if he knows that you’re working on overcoming this, then there’s less likely to be friction and tension between the two of you. 

as for how to work on this? sometimes reminding yourself of facts and reality can help you snap out of things. so remind yourself that your boyfriend loves you, pays attention to you, gives you special treatment haha, and cares about you! and that him not agreeing you on something isn’t a sign of betrayal. writing it down on paper can help? that way you have a visual reminder of it all, keep it close by and repeat it out loud 2, 3, 15 times if that’s what it takes for you to believe it. at other times? sometimes not thinking about the situation can help more haha. so maybe that means taking time to meditate, go on a long walk (maybe have a goal to reach 10k steps for the day) and listen to a podcast? something that helps to relax your mind, something that actively calms your emotions, and something that’s a little more engaging than relaxing by watching netflix haha.

it’s not a failure to have toxic personality traits, we all have them?! none of us are perfect, and what’s important is that you’ve acknowledged yours and that you want to work on it. like with most things, this is going to take some time to shift, so try to be patient with yourself. let us know how things go, all the best <33

- tash

[shego1142]

Hi, um... so I saw your btd and infinity train post and just gotta say, super glad I'm not the only one that thought that! Now that season 3 is officially all out I'm really curious if you've seen it yet and what you thought.

Goes without saying but MAJOR infinity train season 3 spoilers below!

This is also discussing an 18+ horror-porn game which features a lot of gore and other potentially triggering subjects so dni if you are not 18 or older or if gore/murder/etc make you uncomfy!

I just watched the finale. I’m like... in shock?

I mean by no means was or is Simon my fave at all (he just looks a lot like my ultimate comfort character lol) but wow... just... wow

It is a lot different when like... comparing btd with infinity train too tho!

Like, I feel like the entire /point/ of btd is to let your morality go. Like, it’s a horror-porn game.

It’s meant to be like “what up u fucks, being murdered is sexy! Yes Strade daddy kick my fucking head in! Lawrence pls squeeze my actual literal beating heart you weird necrophile”

And meanwhile infinity train is like “we are all just a collection of our actions, we all deserve the chance to redeem ourselves but sometimes we may not be able to due to the trauma we’ve been put through and the finite amount of time we have”

And I personally believe that both of those facets of humanity are okay to explore in fiction. It’s healthy to explore them in fact.

That said like, yea Simon is an asshole but I still liked him. Still think he deserved to redeem himself.

Still think it’s unfair that the train even happened to him at all, because he probably would have been better off at 10 years old with people who could look at him and say “yo, kid, here’s a therapist” instead of him being led by someone who is just as much a scared kid as he is.

Him doing what he’s always been taught to do and suddenly being told it’s wrong... as someone who’s autistic I can tell you that that’s a world shattering circumstance.

Idk if Simon was autistic or not, tbh I was too freaked out by how much he looked like Lawrence to notice much else about him...

Idk personally I liked the finale even if I feel like it wasn’t fair. I like the story even if it ripped me up emotionally, even if it’s making me think about things I wish I weren’t thinking about (like whether or not I’m a good person and whether or not redemption is possible and whether or not somewhere somehow those who couldn’t redeem themselves in this life are able to redeem themselves elsewhere)

I feel hollow after watching the finale, but in a good way.

Yes I would adore beyond all belief to have like, a fic it fic or something that gives Simon a second chance... like idk, maybe he wakes up in the real world from a coma? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

And maybe when she gets out (probably very soon) Grace finds him.

But maybe that’s just it. Maybe that’s the end, full stop, he died, he’s gone, he lived a shitty life from ages 10 to what? 16? 18?

Idk... you asked about my thoughts and rn the main thing I’m thinking is just how much I really do hate how the fandom is this big jumbled mess of completely missing the point.

But anyway, yea no I lost my absolute shit when I saw him in season 2

Like I was /obsessed/ because of how freaking much he looked like Lawrence. Still am, bc wow the hair down look was wild too!

Especially with the “he went insane” scene... very Lawrence.

I guess that brings me back around to what I was saying about btd and infinity train being ultimately so different too.

With Lawrence I personally am like “yes my horrible son, you are a bad socially anxious murder boy and your entire purpose is to murder. Continue your murdering. Especially if it’s me or characters I relate to because I’m dealing with some shit and imagining you murdering me helps me deal with it, you funky little weird coping mechanism you.”

With Simon I’m like “You’re an ass. It’s not your fault though. I would be an ass too if I had been taught from age ten to do things the way you were taught to do them. Your actions are horrible and if you had had a fair shot at learning personal responsibility I would argue that you should be held responsible for them. But since you didn’t, since you spent your entire time on the train without growing, staying stagnant and forcing yourself to regress because it’s what you’d been taught was right, what you thought was right, all I can do is pity you. Your purpose was to learn to be a better person and you failed and I’m sorry.”

They’re ultimately very different characters for me despite how similar they are (obviously the way they look exactly alike but they’re also mentally unstable, started killing at a young age, have anger issues, etc)

I adore infinity train, and all its characters honestly. I really do hope there’s some form of closure for Simon but I’m not expecting it either.

Right now I just wish the fandom wasn’t trying to tear apart those who want closure for him. That’s so... outside of the point of the entire show.

Idk this goes a lot into my philosophy on life in general too I think, basically I don’t think there are people who are irredeemable. Not on shows, not in real life. I think there are just people who need help. I think that people deserve to be treated fairly and with respect regardless of what horrible actions they may have committed.

I guess I’m just really irritated rn at how some of the fandom seems to think that it was Simon’s “right and just punishment” that he died.

It wasn’t a punishment. It was just something that happened. People die. It happens. He didn’t die because he was a bad person. At least I don’t think so.

And it doesn’t make me, or any other fans, or Grace, or the apex kids bad people to mourn for him. For his lost opportunities. He was a traumatised child and he’s gone now.

And the ghom? Wasn’t it shown in season one that the ghoms are Amelia’s fault anyway?

Personally I think the entire point of the train is to work out your problems, full stop.

I think the only way someone is /meant/ to be able to die from the train is to die of old age.

The ghoms are accidental. They’re the product of someone else’s actions.

And sometimes we fall prey to that. And I think it’s okay to look at that and say “well that’s not fair.”

Because it isn’t.

I don’t know if Simon could have gotten better. Maybe he could have?

In the scene where he loses his sanity there for a moment he really did show signs of immense remorse and even confusion.

But honestly? Even if he wasn’t able to get better he didn’t deserve to die. And it disturbs me that a lot of peeps seem to think he did.

Anyway sorry this turned into a bit more of a rant than I meant for it to!!! >~<

Like I said I /just/ watched it!

But yea as far as Simon Laurent looking like Lawrence goes, I’m still a bit freaked out by that. The amount of times I’ve gone to write “Lawrence” instead of Simon in this post is way to high lol!

Personally I wanna know how gato feels about him honestly! Like she’s Lawrence’s creator and Simon really does seem like such a nod to her character!

Thanks for the ask, I got to vent a good bit! Idk if this is the convo you wanted from me tho lol :P

[isrustandstardust]

1. What’s been the best day of your life so far and why?

Hard to decide, I had so many great days.

2. Describe your first kiss, who was it with, what was it like, where was it etc?

It was with my best friend at the time, in my parents garden. It was early morning after a night spent talking, her lips were really soft.

3. What’s your biggest regret? I know we all say we don’t regret things but obviously it’s how we learn, from our mistakes. So what’s something from your past you wished you could have changed?

I could have handled a break up better. I ended up hurting someone I cared for.

4. When was the last time you laughed so hard that tears fell from your face and what was it at?

With my husband, yesterday night. We were actually making fun of someone we know.

5. What is the craziest thing that you have ever done?

Moving in with a guy I barely knew in a city 400km away from all my family and friends.

6. What’s the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you?

Nothing comes to mind rn.

7. Do you have any scars and if so, how did you get them?

I have my arms covered in scars. All of them are from self harming.

8. Where would you like to be in 10 years?

In another house, maybe abroad.

9. What are your views on drugs and alcohol?

I’m for the free of choice. I’ve tried drugs only a few times and not drinking atm.

10. What are your views on religion?

Brainwashing shit.

11. Have you ever thought about ending your own life? If so, why?

Yes, more than once. I tried, twice, when I was 21 and going through a lot. The second time I almost succeeded and woke up in the hospital after being unconscious and intubated for a week.

12. Write 5 facts people might not know about you.

- I am bipolar, borderline and have a schizoafective disorder.

- I dream about Satan and the end of the world on daily basis.

- When I was little I used look for little animals to bury and exhume after a while to see how decomposition works.

- I’ve been into witchcraft and rituals since I was 16.

- I write backwards like Leonardo Da Vinci.

13. What’s your zodiac sign and do you think it fits your personality?

I’m a Scorpio and it fits perfectly.

14. Pinpoint a moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.

When my storyboard teacher remembered me from my online test because it was a perfect score.

15. Discuss your first love.

We were young and trying too hard.

16. Put your ipod on shuffle and write 5 songs that pop up. Explain why each song is on there.

- Don’t mess with me - Brody Dalle. It’s from the soundtrack of a game I love.

- Distance - 4bidden. It relaxes me.

- As the rain comes down - 0K(ill)’s. Because I’m working on their new videoclip.

- 8-MQ 16.10.2001 - 0K(ill)’s. Because it’s inspired by an Italian female serial killer. The title is composed by her initials and date of death.

- Rock and Roll - Gary Glitter. It makes me want to misbehave.

17. Name somewhere you’d like to move or visit.

Iceland.

18. What’s your earliest memory?

My dad taking me to Collodi.

19. What are your views on mainstream music?

It’s heartless and all about making money.

20. What are your highs and lows of this past year?

High: starting officially my character designer career. Low: my mother in law and old dog passing away in less than a month.

21. What are your strongest beliefs?

I believe in being direct and honest. Do no harm but take no shit.

22. Who are you closest to in your family?

My dad maybe.

23. How important do you think education is?

It’s fundamental.

24. What’s one of your favorite shows?

My 600lbs life XD

25. How have you changed in the past 2 years?

I’m more secure of myself and my capabilities.

26. Name 5 people who are famous who you find attractive.

- Tom Hiddleston.

- Mads Mikkelsen.

- Hugh Dancy.

- Michael Fassbender.

- Matthew Good.

27. Name your favorite movie and what it’s about.

3 Iron, in the mood for love. Because they’re sad but huntingly beautiful.

Stoker because psycho killers turn me on.

The fountain because is eternal and heartbreaking.

28. Who is someone who fascinates you and why?

I am fascinated by fictional characters. Like Hannibal Lecter. Yeah, again psycho killers.

29. What kind of person attracts you?

Intelligent people.

30. What’s a problem that you have recently had or are currently having?

My body is giving up on me xD

31. Name something that you miss.

The lake.

32. Share 5 goals you want completed in the next 30 days.

- Doing at least 15 designs.

- Double up my workout time.

- Completing my very first song.

- Take that online course I’ve been postponing for lack of time.

- Get a hold of a camera and go shooting.

33. What’s been the highlight of your month and the lowest point?

Highlight: doing a shit ton of sales on my shop. Lowest point: I don’t recall one, it’s been a pretty good month so far.

34. What’s something that you’ve done in the past that you would never do again?

Being the side chick.

35. What is you’re biggest insecurity & why?

Not being good enough. It can be traced back to my mom being a terrible mother.

36. What were the last 3 songs you listened to and what did they mean to you?

- Natacha Atlas - GAFSA. Because it’s in the soundtrack of 3Iron.

- Morcheeba - Over and over again. I find I’d perfectly fitting.

- Portishead - Wandering star. Because it remembers me of someone from my past.

37. Do you have a toy that’s really special to you and if so what is it, how did you get it etc?

I had a plush of a rhino called Mr. Turkelton [Scrubs reference] that was so dear to me. It’s with my ex, we bought it together and he kept it. Still miss him tho.

38. Have you lost anyone close to you to death?

My mother in law. She was more of a mom to me than my own mother.

39. What is your purpose in life?

Being happy and create beautiful things.

40. When was the last time you cried and what was it over?

I do not remember, but I guess it was during my mil’s funeral.

41. If you got to spend an entire day with your favourite celebrity what would you guys do?

I would love to spend a day with the Mass Effect’s cast playing the game!

42. If you could only listen to one artist for the rest of your life, who would you choose and why?

Tool. Because I’m a masochist.

43. What are 3 traits that you like about yourself and what are three that you dislike about yourself? Personality wise.

Likes:

- Being open minded.

- Being stubborn.

- Being so will powered.

Dislikes:

- Being insecure.

- Being so unable to handle rage that I keep extremely calm until the moment I explode and get cruel and violent.

- Being unable to let go of things that enrage me.

44. Can you cook? If so what are your favorite dishes to make?

I’m pretty good at it. I love to make fresh pasta.

45. What was the last decision you regretted making?

Drinking that glass of milk, now my stomach hurts.

46. Who’s opinion of yourself do you value the most?

Mine. And then my husband’s. I don’t care of no one else’s opinion.

47. What’s the nastiest thing you’ve ever said to another human being and what drove you to say it?

I demolished a guy who was in love with me telling him exactly what I knew it would break him. I did it because he tried to act like I was his property and then got aggressive when I didn’t act accordingly.

48. What’s the nastiest thing anyone has ever said to YOU? Or something that’s hurt you above anything else and why?

Nasty things don’t get to me, I don’t listen to what people say, especially when it comes from someone I don’t care for or I despise. The things that hurt me the most was saying goodbye to someone I was not ready to let go.

49. You can ask your favourite celebrity 3 questions and she’s taken a magical truth pill so she will 100% answer honestly, what do you ask?

Maybe some technical stuff, Idk. I have no ‘favorite celebrity ‘ so...

50. What mark would you want to leave on this world after you are gone?

I don’t care about leaving a mark in a dying world tbh.

51. What makes you most angry?

Liars, incoherent people, delusional people, copycats.

52. Who do you think is a really underrated artist and what do you love about them?

There are a lot of really underrated artists out there trying their very best and being bashed by online algorithms. Support the artists you like!

53. What are the main qualities you look for when thinking about a significant other?

Intelligence, honesty and having moral values.

54. What’s the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for you?

The first that comes to mind is waiting at home for me to return with a hot bath ready and a bed full of rose petals. It’s a cliche,Iknow. But I was young and in love.

55. What is one of your favorite memories?

I have so many, but thinking about the past makes me feel bittersweet.

56. What do you do when you really want to impress someone?

I just act normal, if they’re impressed, good. If not, it’s ok.

57. What are your 3 favourite animals and why?

- Snakes: They’re so fascinating.

- Crows: they’re extremely intelligent.

- Sharks: natural born predators.

58. What’s the nicest present you’ve ever received?

A trip to Paris and a trip to Disneyland.

59. People always go around saying ‘oh I’m their biggest fan’, but what does being a truly big fan of someone mean to you?

Idk, I just like people. I don’t obsess over them.

I obsess over things I like, but not over some individual I don’t know.

60. Have you ever wanted to change anything about your life? If so, what?

I want more money XD

61. What is something you feel like you are really good at?

Drawing. Hopefully making music, but it’s way to early to say.

62. What is something you feel like you can get better at?

Drawing, there’s always room for improving.

63. What is something you feel like you are really bad at?

Hiding when I despise someone. And bowling.

64. If you were given $3,000,000 to put towards 3 charities/foundations ($1 mil each obvs), what would you choose and why?

Wildlife protection, animal shelters, planet’s preservation.

65. What’s one thing someone has done for you that was really small but made a huge impact?

My roommates came back from Xmas holidays one day earlier to have dinner with me because I was alone. And another brought me Xmas dinner a few days before.

66. What do you do when you can’t sleep?

I work :/

67. What’s something that’s on your bucket list?

Make a nice home studio.

68. If you could change 3 things within your government, what would they be and why?

I would actually change the opponent party. They’re dreadful.

69. What’s your favourite holiday and why?

Xmas, because it feels like happiness.

70. What’s the kindest thing a stranger has ever done for you? Even if it’s TINY like holding a door open for you, something that you rememer even though they were a complete stranger.

A stranger helped me when my nose was bleeding like crazy and I was alone in a mall. He also bought me an orange juice.

71. Who’s your favorite cartoon character?

Motoko Kusanagi.

72. What’s the first song that comes to your mind while reading this and why?

Reptile - NIN. Don’t know why.

73. Put the 7 deadly sins in order of the one you commit the most to the least.

Wrath - Lust - Pride - Sloth - Greed - Gluttony - Envy.

74. What would you like to be the first dance song at your wedding?

I’m already married and we danced over Christian Woman by Type 0 Negative XD

75. Have you ever been told you look like a famous person, if so, who?

Someone told me I look like Butterfly from Death Proof and like Amy Lee from Evancescence.

I really don’t see it.

76. What’s one thing you can not live without?

Art. And music.

77. What is the most selfless thing you have ever done for someone?

Going away.

78. Do you hate someone.

No, I dislike a lot of people, I think the world would be better off if some of them would die, it I do not hate them.

79. What are 3 things that have happened in your life that you’ve never forgotten? Big or small, just things you know you won’t ever forget and still seem crystal clear now.

- Almost dying.

- Getting married.

- Signing for my very first house.

80. What comes first to you out of friendships and relationships, and why?

They’re equally important.

81. What’s your favourite children’s tv show/movie?

Muppets: a Christmas Carol.

82. What song makes you cry the most?

Together we will live forever - Clint Mansell.

83. What’s the funniest film you’ve ever seen?

Operation Petticoat.

84. What’s something crazy that you’ve always wanted to do?

Trying human flesh.

85. Has anything ever happened to you that you just can’t forgive?

A lot. Just, a lot.

86. What’s your biggest fear?

Being abandoned.

87. What is your favorite food?

Red meat, pistachio ice cream.

88. Least favorite food? Why?

Celery.

89. Have you ever felt ashamed about something? If so what was it & why?

Not that I recall of.

90. Do you keep a journal? If so what mostly goes in it? Random thoughts, feelings, stories?

I always keep a journal, I write in it pretty much everything, dreams, feelings, ideas, thoughts.

91. When was the last time you said something nice to someone & what made you do it?

This morning to my husband, because he deserves it.

92. How do you feel when someone says something mean/disrespectful towards your fave celeb?

Couldn’t care less? Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, even if it’s a shitty one.

93. What’s the saddest story/one that’s touched you the most that you’ve ever heard on the news?

Milena Quaglini’s.

94. If you were told you were going to have 3 daughters, what would you want to name them?

Violante, Lavinia and Artemisia.

95. Do you have a middle name and if so, what is it?

I have two. Valeria and Maria.

96. How did your name get chosen? What’s the story behind it?

My dad found it in a sci-fi book back when he was a teenager. It was the name of the first baby girl born on the moon.

97. What’s the craziest thing you’ve done for each of your faves e.g. waiting in line for hours, getting up early to see them on tv etc?

I watched a streaming reunion in the middle of the night on N7 day.

98. Are you a virgin?

No.

99. What are the stories behind your tattoos/piercings and if you don’t have any, would you like any?

I have wings because I’ve always been obsessed with winged figures and angels.

I have a lot of movies/books quotes because they all means something to me.

I have cherry petals because of Hagakure.

The snowflake is the reminder of a very important person.

The moth is for my self destructive tendencies.

The witch is a homage to me.

The strawberry is a silly Adventure Time reference.

The snake is a biblical reference to both Lilith and Satan.

The Santa Muerte and the black goat are both linked to my beliefs.

100. Do you want to say something to the world?

Stop being stupid, stop making stupid people famous, open a book.

[kinetic-elaboration]

January 27: 2x04 Mirror Mirror

Had some technical difficulties but finally managed to watch Mirror Mirror. (Now I’m very tired.)

I see these aliens are more intense pacifists than Spock.

When Kirk says “But we won’t [force you], consider that,” right over his shoulder and into camera, it looks like he’s posing for a commercial.

Ah ha, the Classic Transporter Accident. (Aka how that became a classic trope lol.)

I love that they zero in on Spock’s beard first thing, like that’s the weirdest part of this universe.

Oh no, the agonizer!

So my big question is: do all the ISS Captains wear that gold vest or is it a Kirk thing? I just find it very funny that the men in the mirrorverse wear about the same amount of clothing as in the regular universe, and the ladies wear a lot less...and then there’s Kirk, conspicuously showing off his arms. Vests are NOT regulation!

When does he get a chance to record his log? And wouldn’t it be... recorded in the mirrorverse?

Kirk’s salute is hilarious. Uh, yeah, salute and wave, I guess??

He’s really focused on Spock. “Another ship. Another Spock.”

Kirk’s patented reassuring upper arm grab.

Uhura on the bridge! You can’t tell she’s nervous because she’s brave and strong.

This episode, and to a lesser extent The Naked Time, are why I think Sulu has a thing for her. I know it’s a different universe, but I still think it’s true.

Kirk’s salute is getting better. More confident.

He just doesn’t know how to be evil. He’s too good, too pure.

Hmmm, Security Chief Sulu? He really does have a lot of interests.

I wonder what Vulcan is like in this universe. They are still clearly post-Reform. But more ruthless. Scarier. Probably meat eaters.

Damn little Chekov. Just waiting for his chance to mutiny.

Security Chief, like the Gestapo. Did not know that was what the reference was supposed to be.

Hmm, male computer voice. This MUST be an evil universe.

“I’m a doctor, not an engineer.”

Evil Kirk strikes again! Honestly, this scene of the ISS crew on the regular Enterprise might be my favorite in the whole ep. Yet again obsessed with Spock’s facial hair. And Spock is obviously just loving it. “I find it extremely interesting.”

I think Kirk and Spock BOTH know what would buy Spock.

“I should regret your death.” I mean that’s basically a love confession. I love how they depict the K and S relationship in the mirrorverse. The subtle ways in which they’re still a team.

Spock would absolutely have killed Chekov for trying to kill Kirk.

I find evil!Spock the most convincing of all of this universe. I think he simultaneously feels true to the original character, and is also obviously of this universe, and that’s a pretty impressive feat.

“Terror must be maintained or the Empire is doomed.” Print that on a t-shirt.

“Conquest is easy. Control is not.” A lot of the mirror verse is over the top cartoony villainy but this is a very good point, and this scene in general is super interesting and subtle.

Kirk is so tunred on by that conversation with Spock. Like even in these circumstances, he still looks at Spock like he’s in love.

Hmmm, I like Marlena.

Of course evil!Kirk has an on-ship girlfriend, which good!Kirk would never do.

Evil!Spock is still very loyal, so much for all that “I would be a formidable enemy” stuff lol. “You’ll never find another man like him.” Too true.

Of course there’s some plundered alien tech plot device. I actually think that’s an interesting twist in a way... of course the ISS wouldn’t care about stealing, and so some...interesting artifacts might find their way onto starships.

Spock is upset he wasn’t included in this landing party meeting.

Hmmm, Sulu already wants to be Captain.

WHAT? SPOCK HAS OPERATIVES? VULCAN OPERATIVES? WHO ARE THEY? I MUST KNOW MORE. (Is one of them T’Pring?)

Marlena’s Starfleet uniform was hotter than this...paisley nightgown thing.

She’s so dramatic. Kirk is busy one time and she’s like well! I guess we’re over! Transfer me to another ship!

Another Captain Kirk arm grab moment.

I love how literally no one was surprised by that Uhura and Sulu moment on the bridge. “I’ve changed my mind again whoops.”

I can’t believe getting kicked once and then knocked on the head would almost kill Spock lol--seems like probably he might just have a concussion?--but I do like the concept of McCoy risking being left behind to help him. (And Kirk signing off on it because duh.) McCoy is just so good hearted.

Captain Sulu strikes again. Everyone has their own agenda lol. So many obstacles when everyone’s just out for himself.

Haha well that solved that. Zap zap zap and they’re gone.

As suspected, Spock recovered pretty fast. And he goes straight for the mind meld, obviously. That does seem pretty evil of him.

And another obstacle lol. I like that Kirk says Marlena can’t come with them because they can only bring 4 people because of the Calculations, even though... like surely he should already be able to guess there’s another Marlena in his universe and she can’t exactly replace a person who already exists? That would be bad.

Damn Uhura, saving the day again and looking damn fine doing it.

“I must have my Captain back.” Not even subtle about it. He MUST.

The Empire is illogical because it cannot endure.

Is Kirk literally asking this Spock to overthrow his other self and become Captain?

Also...is Marlena going to attach herself to the new Captain?? What does she think of all this?

This is probably one of the best end-of-episode bridge banter scenes in the series. “If I read my Spocks correctly.” Spock is a bit of a pirate. (I think Sarek would agree.) Spock loving the evil humans. Being jealous of Marlena. Kirk probably wondering how Mirror!Kirk and his Spock got along.

I think this is a really great episode, obviously, and I liked all of the intrigue. I thought the double, triple, quadruple crossing was really well plotted. Marlena is one of the better Love Interests and I thought she was really compelling. I LOVED Mirror Spock, and the general characterization of and subtleties to both Spocks. Mirror Sulu was interesting (what does he say about real Sulu I wonder?) and of course we got great Uhura moments and a good Bones moment too. I thought Kirk was interesting in this ep also, not quite confronting his evil side like in The Enemy Within, but...well I do think that was a part of him, the inferred characterization of mirror!Kirk, ambitious, single-minded--”inflexible, disciplined once you’ve made up your mind”--isn’t so outrageous or hard to understand.

I think the weakness of the ep is in the Mirror verse itself. It’s always struck me as a bit too cartoon-villain-y, painted in too broad strokes. Everyone wants to use violence to gain power. If deaths are so common, how has anyone survived this long lol? They allude to this sometimes--Spock not wanting command because it makes him a target, Kirk telling Spock the Empire is wasteful and ultimately unsustainable and thus illogical--but that just invites scrutiny under which the premise doesn’t hold. Imo, an organization like the Empire could never have lasted as long as or become as powerful as the Federation. As Kirk says, control is harder than conquest. I’m not even sure that all of the planets of the Federation could have come together in an Empire, and any allegiance would be very unstable. In other words, I don’t think “the Federation but make it evil” is even a sustainable premise.

Also, while people surely do crave power for the sake of power, I... tend to need a little more in my villainous characterization. Like, when I see that kind of villain, I always think of Price in Mr. Robot: “Every room I’m in, I ask myself ‘am I the most powerful person here?’ and I don’t stop until the answer is always yes.” That really is the core of him--and yet he’s still a subtle villain. That’s kind of the standard for me, I think. To put it another way, maybe the core of all villainy is just lust for power (and/or money) and maybe the best way to get power is brute strength, but the manifestations of evil are usually more subtle: some people who just want power, some people who have more narrow goals and can’t see the whole, many people who have been manipulated, and then just human ills like laziness, ineptitude, selfishness, short-sightedness. Only the most blunt of those traits and instruments really made it into the Mirror verse.

I would have liked to see the mirrorverse be more like... the mob.

...But it is only a 50 minute episode lmao.

Anyway, I find it very interesting that mirror!Spock has Vulcan operatives. His personal security guard is Vulcan, and taking these facts together, I think it’s safe to say that there are more Vulcan officers and enlisted on the ISS Enterprise than USS Enterprise. I’m not sure what to do with that but I find it very interesting. Is he more powerful on Vulcan? Is he more attuned to his Vulcan side? Are Vulcans more impressed with or deferential to him?

Anyway I am exhausted rn and I still have two more days this week so... off to bed. Next week’s ep is The Classic, The Apple.