#I think being pegged will cure him

[fuck-you-im-the-president]

YOU HEARD IT HERE FOLKS, ALEXIS QUACKITY NEVADAS IS PRETTY :3

mmno. ale xis quuackity nbevadas umderscore. maried 👍

[cupidkenji]

If you think I'm pretty

Pairing: Homelander x afab!reader CW: fingering, praise, slightly OOC homie, threats of captivity (he says hes gonna keep reader in the penthouse that's it I promise it's not genuine), cursing, sub!reader, porn without plot (I think this is applicable), they're in a relationship before this, reader says 'John' cause moaning homelander is funny as fuck Summary: Being a perfectionist, you're unsatisfied with a recent test score. Homelander has a cure for that. Disclaimer: reader is always thought to be chubby/fat but there are no physical descriptors here, just an FYI WC: 1,955 Genuinely idk I'd like to apologize for this. I fell out of my Criminal Minds hyperfixation like months ago and haven't written since so I'm really rusty. This is 100% a self-insert but reader is gn and not described other than the fact that they're AFAB. Also this was only proof read once so please point out typos if you see them <3

Your mother used to scold you for being too hard on yourself. Her face is virtually the only thing you can picture as your screen burns your eyes a bit. It’s too early for the high brightness of the device, having woken up before the sun could reintroduce your eyes to light. You’d set yourself up to wake slightly after midnight, intending to check the score of a huge test you’d taken months ago and simply go back to sleep in a matter of minutes. A rather stupid plan, in hindsight. You were questioning now if you knew yourself at all. Your phone had nearly been in your hand when you felt the cold burn of anxiety in your lungs. This test was a huge fucking deal. You were a hardcore perfectionist on top of that, trying with countless futile attempts to surrender your idea of the model score. You just needed to pass, not get your professor to memorialize you in marble for your pure genius. You’d gotten up instead of turning on your phone, brushing your teeth and making your bed before pacing the room slightly while you thought. Essentially, you were just allowing the mantra of ‘cope’ to bound back and forth between your ears for a couple minutes. You weren’t sure if you wanted to cope with the disappointment of a lesser score, or you were telling yourself to come down a couple pegs and be happy with getting by. The repetition of the word soothed that icy-hot feeling that had festered from your lungs to your fingertips, and you checked.

You were fine. Not the score you wanted, but you were fine. 

Mentally you writhed against the slump of your shoulders, but the weight of this self-inflicted shortcoming hit harder than you were capable of defending yourself from. The long sigh you let out was all frost as the tension left your airways. How underwhelming. You laid down on the bed you’d made not ten minutes ago, hearing the window slide open a few seconds into your pity party. You normally left it unlocked for him, knowing if anyone else attempted to enter your home, he wasn’t far. He told you himself that he seemed to have tuned into you specifically; swearing he’d be able to hear you on the other side of the city if you needed him.

“It’s way too early for you to already be having a bad day. The sun’s not even up.” He was closer now, fully sealed into your space and approaching you with comfortable footsteps. You never fully got over the irony of seeing America’s greatest hero flying through your window in sweatpants. “What’s wrong?” You always noticed the subtle way he changed how he spoke around you. In every interview or interaction you’d ever witnessed of his, he’d spoken like a character. For a man who hated having his words scripted, he spoke the same as every cookie-cutter movie he’d starred in. He didn’t talk that way with you, something you hoped was subconscious. A demonstration of the safety he felt around you.

You shrugged in response to the question. You acknowledged the trivial nature of your feelings, knowing you probably reeked of sadness to him but attempting to downplay it anyways. “Bad test score.”

He sat down next to you on the edge of the bed, allowing you the space to remain sprawled out. “Doubtful.” He laughed slightly as he said it, shaking his head and smiling. He looked at you, his eyebrows furrowing minorly. “What’d you get?”

“A four.”

“What were you hoping to get?”

Your voice was barely audible as you spoke, knowing he would pick it up but also trying to spare yourself the rush of immaturity hearing yourself speak would bring. “A five.”

He sighed - a sigh full of endearment that his eyes reflected as he looked at you. You told him once that his eyes were the first thing you’d noticed. It was sunny the day you’d met, and they looked practically ethereal. You’d seen such chaos reflected in them even from day one. The masses called him ‘soulless’ often, but you couldn’t understand such an accusation from anyone who had ever seen him. His eyes were practically overflowing with soul, every time you looked at him it was all you saw. They were capable of incredibly dangerous things but they were so entrancing. He was so fucking enticing. 

You broke the eye contact, but he nudged your leg and moved his head to try and follow your eyes. “Hey-” He called for your attention, so you looked back at him. “You know that’s a good score, right?”

You smiled small at him. “No- I know. I’m just…I don’t know- strict with myself.” You found it hard to put into words. You knew you’d done well, but the ability to feel pride felt withheld from you. Like your eyes bore into it but your mind refused to distribute the feeling it brought to something tangible.

“I think you’re just too much of a fucking perfectionist.” His hand was splayed across your upper thigh from where he sat. No matter which part of you he touched, he had a grip that made your head spin. He was so sure of himself, the strength demonstrated from such an unassuming form never lost the novelty that it’d held when you met him. “Can’t let yourself admit when you did good.”

You tried to be dismissive, but it was hard to fake anything with a man like him. “As if you aren’t, John.” His jaw got the slightest bit tighter at the use of his name. Such a miniscule action that easily dodges the eyes of people who aren’t looking. You couldn’t really imagine not looking at him.

“I’m serious.” His face was still relaxed, but the expression in his eyes had shifted. His pupils dilated and his full attention was on you. “You did good.”

The only con of being with somebody with abilities such as his was the lack of secrecy. You used to laugh with your friends about how grateful you were for the discrete nature of arousal when living without certain body parts. That went out the window when you started seeing him. He knew the second anything shifted within you. He had every perversion you’d ever dreamt about practically categorized by the time your two month anniversary had rolled around. One of his favorite pastimes was casually working a turn-on into conversation and just watching you squirm.

You fought the urge to pull away from his hand, feeling your stomach drop slightly at a declaration like that. “Thank you.” You looked away from him again. Something you knew he didn’t really like but choosing to try and save face over anything else. 

“Yeah…I don’t know.” You could see his focus on the topic increasing by the second. His disposition was happy, but he held serious and almost threatening undertones. He tightened his grip on your thigh and you looked at back to him, hesitantly following the silent command to keep your eyes up. “I think you should say it.”

“John-” His assertiveness was starting to get to you, it always did. You sat up on your forearms to be a little more level with him but he moved his hand from your thigh to your stomach and pushed you back down. The thought of having to lay there and explicitly state that you did well on your test felt like a kid having to write in repetition on a chalkboard in detention. 

He was looking down at you, the eye contact making you slightly dizzy. His face was kind, it almost always was when he was around you, but the conversation was derailing. “I just think it’s important that you understand this.” He was so good at making you want what he thought was best.

You inhaled, swallowing your pride and licking your lips. “What do you want me to say?”

That familiar, condescending smile was starting to creep onto his lips. “Just tell the truth.” His eyebrows raised slightly in a silent prompt. “Say you did good.”

His hand was descending from your stomach, making it’s way to the hemline of your underwear. You hadn’t bothered to change out of what you were sleeping in, only now realizing the vulnerability of it. You held your tongue for a moment, breathing out a quiet “I did good.” 

He tore the only fabric between his hand and you off your body as easily as ripping a sheet of paper and leaned in a little more. “Say it again.”

“John-” You said it as barely an exhale as he skimmed his hand over you. You hadn’t even registered just how sensitive or how wet you’d gotten in the few minutes you were talking to him.

“I don’t know why you act so fucking noble. You should be running Ashleys around in circles or giving interns your coffee order. Not any of this testing bullshit that you’re too good for anyway.” His tone elevated to that mocking, cocky tone that swept into the most shame filled crevices of your mind and tugged the most deprived parts into the driver seat. He thumbed at your clit while he spoke, increasing and decreasing the pressure whenever he felt like it and effectively snatching any remaining ability to form coherent thought from your grabbing hands. “You’ve been chosen by a God, honey. You can do anything, I can give you anything.” He got breathier as he spoke, seemingly soaking up the desperation you were excreting and matching it in a tenfold.

You felt two of his fingers enter you effortlessly and you couldn’t stop yourself from gripping his arm. You always felt the power imbalance most in times like these. A feeling like pulling an angel away from heaven just for yourself, combing through it’s wings with your fingers or trying to lap up a fraction of that status in a wildly inappropriate disregard for the natural roles of nature. He was so much more than you, but he just wanted you to feel good. You swore under your breath as he started circles on your clit. He never got hand cramps, never got tired. He would go until you couldn’t anymore.

“That’s it.” He had barely said it, more just exhaled the assurance under his breath. You were close, you’re sure he could feel it. “Gonna move you to my penthouse. Keep you braindead and needy.”

 It shouldn’t have hit you the way it did. Considering who he was, he could easily fulfill that promise with nobody at Vought even thinking twice. It was the way he said it, the way he acts. Always needing control and always right. The most powerful man alive spent his time fantasizing about control over you, and your stomach twisted in disgust at how badly it got you off.

He slowed his movements as your high declined. He was breathing heavy, but your heart was beating like a drum. He had the smallest smile on his face like the sound gave him a sense of satisfaction. You rose to your forearms, this time with no protest from him, and watched him stand up. He held the back of your head with the hand that wasn’t nearly dripping and kissed the top of your head. It was chaste and quick, but the domesticity of it made your throat ache. He uttered something about getting a towel to clean up, stating he’d be right back before exiting the room. 

You rushed the words out before he could leave. “But you didn’t-”

“Next time.” He just waved you off. “I just thought you deserved a little reward.”

[leighsartworks216]

I think getting double teamed by Astarion and Rolan with Astarion being a dom and commanding Rolan what to do wouldn't cure me but it would do something

My mind is getting ahead of me so im just gonna put a cut here to save everyone who isn't consumed by this thought the trouble

- Rolan being bratty and prideful as usual and Astarion yanks on his horns or tail until Rolan promises to be good

- Astarion fucking into Rolan from behind while Rolan's buried inside you, and every thrust from Astarion makes him thrust into you

- Astarion behind you while you ride Rolan, guiding you up and down on him and caressing and squeezing your sides and chest, and marking up your neck like crazy all the while he keeps asking Rolan if he likes what he sees and shit

- On that thought, Rolan about to cum and Astarion stopping you so only the tip is still inside and asking Rolan if he's been good enough to deserve to cum and Rolan is just whimpering and begging and trying to be good by not bucking his hips

- Astarion guides you again until you both finally orgasm, and holds you down so Rolan fills you deeply, guiding your hips to roll on him so you milk him for everything he has to offer

- Giving Rolan head but Astarion is guiding your head

- Rolan giving Astarion head while you fuck/peg him from behind

I had way too many thoughts about this I'm not sorry

[worriedvision]

Stuck in one place - Kazuha

Gender neutral reader, Kazuha travels to Mondstadt and finds a person who lives in the wilderness, seemingly bored of everything in Mondstadt just looking the same. Unhappy ending

_

When he came to Mondstadt he made the mistake of visiting you - a person who lived in the wilderness of Mondstadt. He was intrigued when hearing of a mysterious "being". Nobody knew who you were, nor were there any missing people's signs up besides the travelers sibling.

He spent time with you, convincing you people made places interesting once he realised you were very introverted but you loved playing your guitar. The music was quite pretty, but ominous to anyone who bought into the rumours you were a deity who planned to kill anyone who got close.

Of course, Kazuha couldn't help but be curious. Perhaps you were like a siren by luring people in with your music, but Kazuha thought you were simply sad.

When you first met, you were immediately taken in by him. You couldn't help but find him attractive, his soft voice matching his appearance. He sat next to you, offering to befriend you because of your music interest.

He'd visit you every night he was in Mondstadt, which led to the inevitable catching proper feelings for him. Ones you hadn't known, ones to warm your chest. He always gave you something interesting to look forward to. He even took you into the town once to show you how many different personalities there are, which once again made you think you were in love.

The last day he was in Mondstadt, you confessed to him. In response, he gave you a reality check.

"I'm afraid I travel alone." Kazha replies.

"I can come with you, please." You insist, only to drop back upon seeing Kazuha become more uncomfortable with your insistence.

"...I can see why you fell for me - I'm the first human you interacted with in a while." When you hear this, you just feel very embarrassed. "I enjoyed our time together in Mondstadt, however I'd prefer to just be friends. I'm sorry, but I don't think I can look at anyone the way you look at me."

Nodding, you slowly turn around nd hunch over, head in your hand as you realise how desperate you have grown.

"Next time I visit Mondstadt, I would like to see you again."

"...Don't visit me again." You blankly reply, Kazuha looking down at his feet. "My time in this world is short, it wouldn't have worked."

"...What?"

"You heard the rumours of a land Siren, yes? Well, that's true - I don't know my origin, but this guitar is a large part of me. I have no family, no friends."

"Apart from-"

"No, even you aren't a friend. All you are trying to do is soften my rejection, that much is clear." You sigh, grasping your guitar. "I have been given orders to burn the guitar, destroy my lifeform. I just wanted to leave this world without any regrets - so thank you for confirming you will never look at me the way I look at you."

"Perhaps if I speak to the Acting Grand Master I can find a cure for...you..." Kazuha stops, noting you have already started to walk away.

He hears you start a fire, and he spots the orange gleam of light that erupts when you throw the guitar in. Kazuha runs up to see you one last time, and you look...neutral. you don't look relieved of sad, you're just there.

Well, not now that you were growing more difficult to see as more of your dorm gets burned in the fire.

The fire died down after some time, leaving behind the guitar strings and the pegs holding them to the one existent body. You are no longer here, Kazuha could tell.

Kazuha places the strings in a more visible slit, finding a stick and making a headstone for you before paying his respects, leaving your body to rest.

[neetily]

↳ EVENT 08. Harvey (Corruption Kink & Anal)

— ✧ warnings: Corruption Kink, Anal, sex toy, strap on, consent cheks, Established Relationship, Masturbation — ✧ word count: 2,616 — ✧ genre: smut (18+)

— ✧ A/N: reposting from my old account since i was asked to! formatting might be off, but it's still readable.

His voice is shaky and unsure when he eventually gains the confidence to speak, interrupted only by brief bouts of nervous laughter as you hold the silicone item before him, seemingly proud of the size and girth of it, confident that he'll react the way you want. And it's not that he's intent on disappointing you, God no, so far from it! It's just, well;

"Are you sure this'll help me relax?"

He hadn't meant to sound so taken aback, disbelief tainting his otherwise genuine question. But the strap on you so happily wiggle before him is a little intimidating, if he's honest. That, and his analytical mind is unable to conjure up any reason as to why the offending item will supposedly help him de-stress, get him out of his shell as you so eloquently put it earlier on in the week. He's not one to judge, but the scepticism is likely clear on his face; he's never been the best at hiding his emotions. And neither are you apparently, his expression prompting the fall of your own after his admittedly meek questioning leaves his heart hurting a little, aching to reach out and cup your cute little cheeks as a soft reminder that he trusts you! He's just a little anxious, as per usual.

But, you make the first move. Like always, swooping in to save him when his heart is hammering and he struggles to find the right words to express himself appropriately. It's one of his favourite things about you, honestly. How you manage to sync up with him so well without even trying. The romantic within him pinning it down to fate, or destiny.

The look of sympathy you offer him is very much appreciated, an immediate balm to his anxiety ridden heart. Better yet are your sweet reassurances that follow.

"We don't have to do this if you don't wanna, Harvey," Though, the gentle pass of your fingers running up and down his already exposed thigh is all the convincing he needs to proceed ahead with caution, but still he listens to you. Waits for an opportunity to say his piece. "You can always say no— I just think that dabbling outside of your comfort zone might show you that anxieties aren't always telling the truth, y'know?"

While part of him understands that you only have the best of intentions, pretty words promising to help heal him— even if in an odd way. The other half of him is still anxious, fists balled into the familiar sheets below as he trembles before you on your shared bed. When he married you, he knew that there would be obstacles to overcome, difficulties that could—and would—be shared. However, he never expected this. To be stark naked in bed, the pretty sight of you in some delicate lingerie doing wonders for his lust, cock already hard and dripping precum down to his tummy without needing to be touched too much. The strap on you so boldly hold drawing his attention front and centre, gulping at the thought of using it in any capacity beyond decoration.

Still, he persists. Even if only because he trusts you. Completely and utterly, placing all of his faith in you to cure the doctor himself. Where he's failed, he's certain that you'll be able to help— and, there's the added benefit of making you happy too! Something he always strives for.

"No, no," He rushes to answer your acknowledgement of his predicament. "Like you said, um... I think it's worth a shot!"

Ever the vanilla, being pegged as you described it has never crossed his mind before. He knew it existed, of course, but it's never been a topic of discussion in his mind other than: huh, that exists. However, thanks to your insistence on the topic, even going out of your way to research and prep all of the necessary items for the big event, he thinks it's worthwhile trying. There's no use in outright declining an attempt, he'll never know whether he likes it or not without at least trying!

And he's been wanting to be more sexually adventurous with you, even if his thoughts revolved more around having you be on the receiving end of such experimentation. The analysist within him is excited at the prospect of potentially discovering new things about himself, whereas the realist is worried over the practicalities.

Which is where you, fortunately, come in. God forbid he explore the topic on his own, pushing his glasses up in an attempt to focus on the situation at hand, doing his best to not touch his cock to the sight of your pretty smile as you shuffle closer, finding home between his legs. "All right," You start, helping him spread his legs a little wider, toying with the beads of precum at his tip before grabbing the length of his cock with a teasing touch. He inadvertently bucks into the feeling of your soft hands, heat rushing to his cheeks at the cute giggle you let out in response to how sensitive he is.

"Let's warm you up, then."

Two fingers, coated in a mixture of saliva, precum, and lube, press deep inside of him. It's an odd feeling, not wholly unbearable, inching on pleasurable the longer you rest them inside of his asshole. But still, definitely, uncomfortable. Which is probably obvious given how his face scrunches up in inadaptability, slightly cringing at the newfound feeling in his lower half.

"How are you feeling, love?" You tenderly ask him, and it takes him a moment to collect his thoughts. Another few to gather the strength to speak with the pressure he's experiencing below the belt.

"Uh... Weird. I think?" He questions even himself, eyes trained on the way his cock bobs and jerks under him, matching the lazy strokes in and out of his ass from your fingers. It's difficult to deny that some part of him does enjoy the feeling your offering him, it's just that it's new, he decides. Yeah, it's just new and he's just anxious, worried about his performance, how he must look to you right now, slightly hunched over himself as an instinctual reaction to the tension of your fingers inside of him.

And the light laughter you let out given his response only heats his cheeks up some more, his own fingers tightly fisting into the sheets in soft embarrassment. "It's okay, Harvey. I think most people feel that way when they just start too. Give it a few minutes, and then we can decide if you wanna stop or keep going, okay?"

Okay, that he can work with. Once again relaxing his posture, leaning back against the bed headboard to let you work your magic. It only takes a minute or so longer for your words to ring true, for his trust in you to bear fruit— resulting in his body jerking forward at a mere prod against his insides.

"W-Wait!" He ends up gasping, surprised at the tone his exclamation carries itself with, but nonetheless he continues rambling. "What— wait, what was that?" He almost laughs, tenderness present in how his hand wraps lightly around your wrist that's pressed against his ass. He's not even aware that he's doing it until you just as affectionately remove his hand, cooing sweetly for him to relax.

"Told you it'd feel good." You smile, toothy and wide for him to further trust, wide eyes imploring you to show him more of what you mean, because now his interest is piqued.

With every curl of your deft fingers inside, as if pressing on a feel good button, his upper body jerks forward with his cock, spilling precum aplenty for the fingers you have buried knuckle deep in his hole. The once weird and strange feeling in his abdomen soon becoming known and hot. The well acquainted burn in his tummy that he so often experiences when you're touching him slowly climbs back to where it should be, increasing only because you decide to slowly stroke his pulsing cock in tandem with your finger strokes.

His toes curl with your fingers, huffs of air rushed out only for him to gasp it back in, half moans and stuttered words, he's not quite sure what he's trying to convey. One things for sure though, and that's that he doesn't feel so worried any more. The comfortable pooling of lust in his core convincing him to seek out only what feels good, forget about everything else. And he's about to warn you of his fast approaching orgasm, but when words yet again fail him, God can you blame him with the way your fingers skilfully explore his insides, making him feel things he never thought possible, his body does all the talking for him. Shaking under you, panting for air with every pump of your fingers, carding through his hair to clean off the dripping sweat from his forehead.

And then you stop. Suddenly and carelessly. And though he can breathe again, only a pitiful whine escapes him at the loss of stimulation.

"The main event waits, love."

Your reminder of the object to his side startles him out of his lust filled stupor, but only for a moment. For his cock remembers how good it felt to have you inside of him just moments ago, finding himself eagerly nodding for you to proceed, a reassuring grasp at your arm while you get yourself strapped up conveying the message of: please, I'd do anything to feel that way again. Once reserved, now needy.

To be in this position, that is to be under you and not the one on top lining his tip up to your hole, feels strange. Not necessarily in a bad way, but rather... It leaves his head a little dizzy. Body tingling under your touch at the excitement coursing through him, wanting more than anything to keep his mind as empty as it's been turned from your touch.

He feels you tug at his ass, a brief moment of shyness creeping up on him before you compliment him on how pretty it looks. A word he never thought possible to describe himself, but he easily trusts that you're being honest when your gaze meets his own, and he can see the matching hearts in your eyes.

"Be gentle, please..." He mutters, overwhelmed with love and affection for you as you rub the silicon tip up and down between his cheeks, dribbling copious amounts of lube over it despite how wet and pink his asshole already is.

He's not sure why he said it, considering that you are the love of his life and you've already proved to him just how good exploring new things is, helping him relax into the comfy pillows and sheets below as he wiggles himself lower down to get into position for you. But oh to have you lean over him and whisper about how proud you are of him, and how you've always wanted to see him under you like this, distracting him with words of praise as you slowly push the tip of the toy into his stretched out asshole feels so good, ah... Leaves his mouth hanging open and glasses slipping down his nose, a little loving groan escaping him when you kindly help push them back up.

Something as big as the toy almost feels like the experience is restarting all over again, feeling all funny and full in his tummy until you manage to work your faux cock inside of him enough to be fully sheathed. The weight of the toy heavy against his squirmy insides, his brows furrowed in sheer horny frustration.

"Gonna move now, okay?"

He doesn't trust his voice right now, merely nodding up at you as his hand reflexively wraps tight around his throbbing cock when you draw your hips back, squeezing at the base of it as you thrust your hips forward. And the pace is settled quickly, nice and easy and gentle enough for him to grow accustomed to the toy exploring his insides— helped by the fact that he's effectively masturbating in front of you while you tenderly pound his twitching hole.

Tugging his cock up and down, moaning openly at how slippery he feels, front and back. He can barely focus on your face due to his eyes continuously rolling back, body jerking up the bed with your every thrust, humping inside of his tight heat so nicely that he can't help but to compliment you. Spilling babbled thanks between sighs of satisfaction, helping you fuck into him by sliding his ass down onto the toy when he can; as much as possible anyway, given his laying down missionary position under you.

And the feeling of your nails on his thighs, prompting him to lift his legs up and oh— shit.

"Ah, wait—" He begs of you, but certainly doesn't stop jerking off, and he's all too happy for himself when you don't heed his warnings either. Nails digging into the fat of his thighs, pumping the silicone cock in and out of his hole at a new angle; one that immediately tightens the ball of lust in his tummy. "I'm close, gonna cum if you keep going like— ah, like that—!" He urges you for a breather, but when he catches your smirking expression, he understands intimately what you'd rather do.

So he doesn't complain when he feels you pick up the pace, a muffled slap! filling the room with every wet fuck forward you make inside his ass. Moans dripping from his lips, intermingled with half gasps of your name, whines for you to stop, or was it don't stop? Fucking his fist faster too, attempting to match your unfair thrusts, but he's too sloppy with it. Mind too far gone with pleasure to actually attempt to jerk off, instead just idly playing with himself because it feels good. Something he's scarcely done before, but you've brought out some new side of him tonight. One that needs and whines and begs for more, back arching off the sheets when your tip repeatedly knocks against that sensitive spot inside again and again, just like earlier with your fingers.

All he can do is silently stare, brows furrowed in concentration of your every greedy stroke inside, fucking his ass so good that he feels a little numb, honestly. Ropes soon shoot from his tip as his orgasm washes over him, thick and white. Spurting all over his chest, a couple shots landing on his glasses for which he hasn't the capacity to care about, not when you continue to fuck him through the good feeling. Making sure to hump every last drop of cum out of his cock with your toy, milking him dry, his tightly wrapped fist glazed over with sticky seed.

And before clarity has a chance to hit him, he scrambles to beg you to continue, to prolong his empty mind and the good feeling between his legs. The doting smile you wear upon his broken pleading is confirmation enough that you enjoy that idea very much so too.

At least for now, his troubles are far away. And, if ever he needs help in future again, he knows what to ask for. Excited about all the new possibilities your little experiment has brought out of him tonight, wanting to eagerly explore as many options as possible in the safety of your shared 4 walls for the rest of the night.

You wouldn't mind, would you? If he asked for more, a tinge of greed gripping his heart as he watches you fuck him all better.

[tocomplainfriend]

Funny thing (not really) I’ve noticed is that Viv has always fetishized m/m relationships. There’s obviously Stolitz, but it goes back way further. There’s Addison from Zoophobia being shipped with a guy who works at his high school, but to mention that Viv has drawn NSFW of them despite Addison canonically being a minor. There’s also Autumn and Rusty, the former whom gets bullied by Rusty cause Rusty is secretly in the closet. Ten years later and she’s still weird about m/m relationships.

TW: fetishizing Queerness

I tried to search a little for Addison's age. In the wiki, that I know Viv did not write it says he is 18, other post say 17- there are people saying the age got changed too? I know almost nothing to zoophobia- if anyone knows about this claim, share your knowledge and importantly evidence of the age thing in specific? I do know about those snake drawings. And also was Viv 19? Have no clue-so I'm not gonna super talk about it without knowledge.

About the Rusty thing, I don't think Viv is a good enough writer (of relationships especially, cause Stolitz mainly) to pull that relationship or story. I don't think she can pull the idea of the closeted bully, purely by the fact that she doesn't understand or acknowledge the problems Stolitz has. If she needs to put down characters to make Stolas seems better and try to justify the power imbalance. I don't think she could write this if she wanted to. This closeted gay bully is such an old trope, too. I think the worst you can do (also as a non-amazing writer) is actually tried to make a romance out of it? Cause a lot of these tropes are more like "HAHA THE BULLY IS GAY HAHAHA", rather than "aww the bully was just sad and gay all along". I don't like it. (also this includes when the bully doesn't bully his romantic interest)

A lot of problems in mlm stuff Vivziepop does is similar to those Yaoi fetishization shit. Where there are also power imbalance. Also, this treatment of the characters like Moxxie? Like he is bi, and with Millie- and his treatment is so shitty. The hole thing of MILLIE PEGS MOXXIE, and that funny cause is less manly of him? Or where the succubus sexually assault them and that is funny??? (that one is not even Blitz being an asshole to him, it's made to act funny). As soon there is something viewed as feminine from him, the show makes fun of him. His feminine appearance in Unhappy campers also leads to make fun of him. Where he is the most vulnerable and insecure is that episode. He is more objectified in a feminine appearance.

Just the entirety of Stolitz is literally a lot of yaoi-sh problems. Also, I do see a lot of red flags in how they wrote Fizz and Asmo'. Because Fizz was insecure af, that he needed the approval of Mammon as an imp. Mammon was using the power that he had over Fizz to use him to get money. He got his approval from Asmo another sin in a higher position of power. (The power imbalance is not the problem vibes). Plus, The Big dominant protector and the sub small uwu cure relationship. Fizz, compared to the first time he appeared, he is so vulnerable and acts so cutesy. Like, the confidence he had during the S1, disappeared so bad. Acting so nice to Glitz and Glam, felt like cutting out all attitude to "uke-fing" him into needing a savior. They make him so powerless

Fizz, a quad amputee, was put in a vulnerable situation related to his trauma and where he lost all his limbs and horns. All to make Blitz "redeem" himself and make them friends again... THAT SUCKS.

Also, there was the fact of how over-sexual all the male mlm characters are, too. Like, Chaz was so much more sexual than Verosika as a succubus.

IT JUST SUCKS.

[lunascalamity]

Head empty, thinking about sub tsukishima.

Sub tsukishima who would try and be intimidating out of the bedroom, only to internally regret it when you don’t say anything and just laugh at his brattiness. Do not humor his bratty behavior, he just wants a reaction. Instead, play coy and let him slowly breakdown and finally tell you what he wants.

Sub tsukishima who would fight you so hard on who should be the dom when you first bring it up at the beginning of your relationship. Not because he wants to be the dom, but because he wants to make it seem like you convinced him to be submissive, instead of him wanting to be it in the first place. So when you back off and say you guys should talk about a compromise, he immediately backpedals and is like “okay fine! Jesus… wanna peg/fuck me soooo bad 🙄” tsundere motherfucker 😒

Sub tsukishima who’s always gonna make you work for it every single time, no matter what. Testing you while you guys make out, trying to lead. But give him even the littlest bit of pressure with your knee to his dick and he breaks so fast. Going from “ffuck hurry up” to “mmpff god please please please~”

Sub tsukishima who always just waits for you to initiate everything. So when you don’t do anything as a joke one day, he becomes super bratty. Why aren’t you touching him, annoying him, or making stupid dirty jokes? “You’re being so weird today…” Worries he did something wrong. When you tell him it was a joke he doesn’t think it’s very funny and just scoffs, so fuck him good that night ‘kay?

Sub tsukishima who is so cute when he’s fucked out, pushing your head towards his for a kiss, holding your hand, wrapping his legs around you so you don’t go, all while he glares at you like, bro? —“Want me to stop?” he squeezes your hand tighter, “N-no, shut up.”

Sub tsukishima where you tease him by making him communicate

“Cmon Kei, I’m not doing anything until you tell me what you want.”

“Who said I wanted anything, this was your idea.”

“So you’re telling me that’s not your boner i’m feeling right now?”

“I’ll just deal with it myself.”

“Alright then, deal with it.”

He tries to prove you wrong by jerking off in front of you, trying to say ‘I don’t need you to cum’. But the way you look at him so smugly yet lovingly makes his whole body so hot and turns him on so much. He tries to look away but it doesn’t feel as good. And when you start whispering praises absentmindedly? “Fuck you’re so hot.” “You look so good like this.” He’s so done. At that point, he’s just jerking off for you, your praises egging him on. And when he does cum, he feels so unsatisfied. Your presence did a lot to get him going, but nothing can compare to your touch. so edge him till he apologizes.

———————————-☆

I was planing on just doing a few headacannons (or whatever tf these are) to cure some of my writing block and motivate me more, but I ended up writing more than I thought 💀 kei brain rot strong. Proud tsundere fucker 🦅🇺🇸🔥🔥🔥‼️‼️‼️💪

[weresprout]

This is a little silly but I remember their being things made for like a if the twisted are cured scenario and the one shot also reminded me of it because god, he’d be especially clingy towards Finn if he saw him get twisted and blamed himself for it. He’s going to be such a hot mess

YEAH. Glisten blames himself for it because the situation in the fic was just ..

Glisten gets mauled by Pebble, scrambles back, in a moment of panic Finn uses an airhorn and gets in the way, getting grabbed and mauled (even worse) than Glisten. They're both dropped and abandoned and the other toons just leave them there to die.

In this hypothetical - yeah. Glisten wouldn't leave Finn's side for anything. I've seen people depict rehabilitated Finn with a wheelchair, but I've always liked the idea of him having prosthetic legs! I think he'd find them awesome, and he'd totally give one of them a peg leg .. I mean, he's Finn. Why wouldn't he want to look like a pirate??

Plus then Glisten can help him style the prosthetics. I'm sure he'd enjoy it!

I do like to think Finn would try to convince Glisten it isn't his fault, and I think Glisten would be more likely to lie and go "okay" than actually accept that. I don't think he'd ever stop blaming himself.

[ladykailitha]

Oh For a Muse of Fire! Part 9

This is the last of the grim!dark chapters. The healing starts here. TW: mention of attempted rape, mention of violence, homophobic slurs.

Wherein I combine Billy Hargrove and demobat wounds.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6  Part 7  Part 8

*

They went for coffee at the same shop from before. Eddie with his black coffee, Steve with his caramel macchiato.

They sat down at one of the tables and stared at their drinks for a few awkward moments.

“I’m sorry I hit you,” Steve murmured, his hands clasped under the table on his lap. “I hate it when it gets that bad. I have no control over my body. And at least with the seizures I know what causes those and can avoid the triggers. But the panic attacks can be triggered by such small things. I–I’m sorry.” He looked up him. “Robin said you had to go to the hospital, I hit you so hard?”

Eddie let out a slow breath. “Yeah. You dislocated my jaw.”

“Shit, shit, shit!” Steve muttered, his hands flailing in distress. “I’ll pay for the cost of the visit. I don’t care if it’s been years. I’ll beg for the money from my mom if I have to. I’m so so sorry.”

Eddie grabbed Steve’s hands and held them tightly. “Hey, hey. Calm down. It’s okay.”

Steve shook his head.

Eddie began to rub circles into Steve’s wrists with his thumbs. “I need you take a deep breath for me. You’re starting to hyperventilate.”

Steve gasped, taking in air.

“There we go,” Eddie continued. “Now hold it for a moment and then let it out slow.”

He did as Eddie instructed and after a few tense minutes, he was breathing normally.

“Sorry about that,” Steve murmured, picking at the top of his cup. “But I’m serious about the money though. You shouldn’t have had to pay for that.”

Eddie shook his head. “Nah, it’s okay. I was still on my uncle’s VA insurance at the time, I didn’t have to pay a cent.”

“Are you sure?” Steve asked softly, looking up at him. “I still have some money left over from the hate crime reparations.”

“No, man,” Eddie said gently. “That’s yours, you keep that. You want to tell me what happened?”

Steve took a sip of his drink and then nodded. “This guy, Billy Hargrove had just transferred from California. Big, tough guy. Wanted everything he had out in Cali without having to earn it here. Started throwing his weight around.”

Eddie nodded. “I remember him. Real asshole.”

“After school one day,” Steve continued, “I caught him and couple other jocks pushing Robin around. Calling her a fag and telling her that all she needed was a good fucking from a real man and she’d be cured right quick.”

Eddie’s eyes went wide and he leaned forward in shock. “They were going to rape her?”

Steve shrugged. “I have no idea if they were only talking shit, but it wasn’t a risk I was willing to take.”

“Yeah, no,” Eddie agreed. “Good on you, man.”

“So I decked the ringleader,” Steve said. “Hauled off and hit Billy square in the face.”

“Score one for the little guys,” Eddie said with a smile.

Steve laughed bitterly. “Too bad the score ended up one hundred to one.”

Eddie let go of Steve’s hands to take a sip of his coffee. “Did his friends jump you?”

Steve nodded. “One of them had a rope with them, more evidence that they were planning to do something to Robin,” he said wincing at the memory. “They wrapped it around my neck and tied it to back of Billy’s motorcycle. He got about fifteen feet before a teacher spotted him. He cut the rope with a pocket knife and gunned it out of there. Leaving his friends to deal with the aftermath.”

Eddie shook his head. “Should have pegged him for being a coward. Most bullies are.”

“The thing is,” Steve said, voice strained, “I thought I was bisexual until the news painted me as gay. Gay fits the poor, picked on teen better than a bisexual does or whatever. I thought I liked both, but the more the media talked about how gay I was that I started thinking about it seriously for the first time and realized that they were right.”

Eddie took one of his hands again. “I’m sorry you went through all that. I’m even sorrier I didn’t know.”

Steve nodded.

“Let me make it up to you,” Eddie said softly.

Steve let out a surprised laugh. “That’s my line!”

Eddie grinned, giving his hand a squeeze. “Looks like we both have a lot of things to make up for.”

Steve squeezed Eddie’s hand back. “I’m willing to call it even, if you are.”

Eddie’s grin softened to a sweet smile. “I’d like that.”

*

Eddie looked at the call sheet for the songs they were going to play at the Queen’s Crown and tapped the pen to his lips. He loved the finale. The Jester and the King was the best song to go out on. It was raw and it was emotional and it was all a lie.

The King wasn’t cruel. He was broken and hurt. He was sad and lonely. The jester had failed to notice that King had grown tired and worn. Willing to replace his crown of gold and jewels for a crown of thorns and thistles.

Thorns and Thistles...that had potential.

Hear the wind as it whistles... You traded your crown for thorns and thistles... Your once valiant sword broken The life you held so dear taken From you, my dear Those you loved now turn in fear

Yes. That’s good. Eddie continued to work on the song.

Once the lyrics were tight, he pulled out his acoustic guitar and began nail down the bridge. He wanted it stripped down. He wanted it heartbreakingly beautiful.

He looked up at the clock and cursed. The song was done. But it was after four in the morning. He tucked the completed song into his guitar case and changed into his pajama pants. As he drifted off to sleep he realized that he felt lighter than he had in days. Years even.

He really should have talked to Steve sooner.

*

That Friday Steve got a call from the auto body shop saying his car was ready. Which considering when he called last week when it first broke down they didn’t have a time line for him because they were backed up, but they would get to it as soon as they could.

So the fact that it was ready now was like a dream come true. And he hoped on the bus and was at the shop as soon as he could manage. He walked up to the receptionist and gave them his name, and said he got a call saying his car was ready.

The man behind the counter nodded and told him to sit down and wait. They’d pull it out front for him.

Steve had barely sat down when an older man came out, hands covered in grease, a stained rag wiping them off.

“Steve?” the warm, friendly voice called.

Steve looked up. He recognized that face, but it took him a moment to realize from where.

“Wayne?!” he cried. He was on his feet in an instant. “Oh my god. It’s been years. How are you?”

Wayne gave him a hug, which Steve gladly returned.

“It’s good to see you, kid,” Wayne said with a smile. “What are you up to these days?”

“I’m finishing up art school,” Steve replied. “I’m going be teaching it to middle school students.”

“Art school?” Wayne said. “That’s amazing, kid. I’m glad you’re doing well.”

Steve looked around the shop. “So you left the plant to become a mechanic? That’s awesome.”

Wayne grinned. “Not just become a mechanic. This shop is mine.”

Steve’s eyes went wide and his jaw dropped. “That’s incredible. So the Hellfire Shop is yours? Wow. Wayne, that’s just so...wow.”

Wayne chuckled. “My nephew named the shop. From one of his comic books he reads.”

Steve snapped his fingers. “From X-men, right? I don’t read the comics, but I saw the movie.”

Wayne chuckled. “Then you’re already a step above me on that one, kid.”

“So...I wasn’t expecting to get my car back so soon,” Steve said. “I was told when I called that you guys were backed up with a lot of other cars ahead of mine.”

Wayne grinned and pointed out the front door. “That’s because he came in and fixed it for you.”

Steve followed where he was pointing and saw Eddie get out of the BMW and start wiping it down.

“Eddie?” he breathed.

Wayne chuckled. “He’s damn fine mechanic, my nephew. But he was always built for bigger and better things.”

Steve huffed out a surprise laugh. “Eddie’s your nephew? Oh, my god. It’s such a small world.”

Wayne gave Steve’s arm a squeeze. “Go on, then. Go get your baby.”

Steve looked at him in a amusement, because the look on his face said that the older man wasn’t talking about his car.

He walked out of the shop just as Eddie finished wiping down the hood of his car.

“Hey, Eds,” Steve greeted softly.

Eddie turned around with the biggest grin on his face. “She’s all fixed up for you, big boy.”

“That’s amazing,” Steve gushed. “Thank you so much. Your uncle was telling me that you did it all by yourself?”

Eddie nodded. “I know my way around an engine.” He blushed. “I just didn’t want you to get caught in another storm.”

Steve’s eyes lit up. “Thank you,” he breathed. “Let me take you out to dinner as a token of my appreciation.”

Eddie grinned. “I’d like that.”

“Well um...since we live in the same apartment complex,” Steve suggested, “why don’t we met in the center courtyard at 7pm on Sunday?”

Eddie’s grin grew bigger and his face dimpled. “I’ll be there.”

Steve got into his car and pulled down the visor to grab the keys. He waved at Eddie as he pulled away.

*

Wayne walked out to stand next to Eddie and they watched as Steve drove off.

“You writing songs about him and fixing his car,” Wayne said with a cheeky grin, “am I to be expecting a wedding announcement soon?”

Eddie turned to him, scandalized. “Uncle Wayne! It’s not like that.”

Wayne raised a single eyebrow.

“You know how much of an ass I’ve been to that man?” he defended.

Wayne nodded and cocked his head. “True. But you didn’t see the look on his face when he saw that you had fixed his car.”

Eddie tucked his chin in in confusion. “What’s that supposed to mean? What expression?”

Wayne walked off and waved his rag at Eddie as he said, “That same doe-eyed dopey expression you’ve got on your face just now.”

Eddie stared after his uncle in shock. Steve wanting to hook up or at least be more open in his appreciation of his naked body was one thing. One that Eddie could handle and keep locked away. But fond looks and doe-eyes were bordering on affection or even outright love and Eddie didn’t think he could handle that.

*

Eddie sat down in front of the Corroded Coffin boys with his acoustic guitar in one hand and the song in the other.

“I want to add one more song to our lineup for next Saturday,” he explained.

Gareth rolled his eyes. “There is no way we can learn a new song in a week, man. It’d kill us.”

Jeff nodded. “I’m going to have to agree with Gare on this one.”

Eddie smiled. “Look, you won’t have to. It’ll just be me and this baby,” he held up the acoustic, “and I’ll put it after Silent Killer but before we ramp it back up to Louder, Louder.”

Gareth and Jeff shared a glance.

“But we’d have to drop a song if we do that,” Jeff protested.

Brian cocked his head to the side. “It depends on how long this new song is. So go on then, Eddie. Show off.”

Jeff buried his head in his hands. “Don’t encourage him, Bri.”

Eddie just grinned. “You want to hear it or not?”

Gareth sighed. “Yeah, go ahead.”

“Betrayal!” Jeff howled.

Gareth just shook his head. “He’s never going to let up until we let him play it so we might as well get it over with.”

Jeff’s shoulders sagged. “Yeah, all right.”

Eddie placed his guitar on his knee and began to play.

Roughly three and half minutes later there wasn’t a dry eye in that tiny garage where they practiced.

“Holy fuck, man,” Jeff croaked. “Where the fuck did that even come from?”  

Gareth threw his arms in the air. “We have to play it. This song come mean the difference between getting the record deal or not.”

“So what do you think, Bri?” Eddie asked after a few minutes of shocked silence.

The other man just stared at him a moment. “Dude, I don’t care where that song came from, that was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard. Gare is right, if we don’t let you play it, we might get the record deal. If we do, it’s a sure shot. They’d be fools not to.”

Eddie grinned. “To answer Jeff’s question; I have a new muse.”

Part 10  Part 11  Part 12 Part 13  Part 14  Part 15  Part 16  Part 17 Epilogue

Tag List: @artiststarme @allbymyselfexceptformycactus @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @itsall-taken @m-owo-n @zerokrox-blog @runyousillydetective @grimmfitzz @wonderland-girl143-blog @sapphirecobalt-1 @scheodingers-muppet @victor-thee-corvid @apricottree @bookbinderbitch @sleepyboosstuff @biatcgh @pixiefallingupthestairs @grtwdsmwhr @thepainisspicy @carlyv @eboyawstenn @bisexualdisastersworld @bidisastersworld @abstractnaturaldisaster @evix-syne666 @nerdsconquerall @lololol-1234 @goodolefashionedloverboi @chaoticlovingdreamer @a-little-unsteddie @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @elluminis @tailsfromthecrypt @danili666 @plyerice27 @alittlegreyfish  @n0-1-important @no-upper-limit-to-stupidity @maya-custodios-dionach @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @heaven428 @thedragonsaunt 

[ecargmura]

Paradox Live Episode 7 Review - Boys On The Rooftop

Before I start the review, I want to thank people who left comments on my review of the previous episode. I really appreciate your time explaining to me about the source material and what part was anime original and what not. I’m glad I’m writing reviews. The engagement and interactions motivate me to keep going. Now, onto the review!

(TW: S**cide)

I was told last week that this week’s episode was going to be a strong one. I agree with their statement wholeheartedly. This was quite the episode. It answered the questions I had in the previous episode, but also gave me new questions. It was nice to see the overall plot slowly coming into play here.

Last episode, Shiki told Ryu that the ghost in that building could’ve been the friend that he killed. While Ryu doesn’t believe him (also had some weird split personality moment), Shiki decides to head out to check the building one day. It turns out that he has a past with Nayuta. Shiki grew up a loner, but encountered Nayuta one day and became friends. Their friendship was so cute and sweet to look at! Nayuta had a mysterious part-time job that turned out to being a lab rat; I assume he was being experimented on by Alter Trigger? Anyways, the experiments got to be too much as he developed Phantometal corrosion and decided to jump off the building to not make Kanata worry. Unfortunately, this left Shiki traumatized for good. I finally understand why he’s always apologizing when getting a trap reaction. That is seriously something traumatizing for Shiki.

Now this pegs the question of just who Nayuta is. Why is Nayuta still alive with Kanata but supposedly died when he was with Shiki a few years ago? What’s with the long-haired Nayuta in the post-credit scenes? I made some theories after watching the episode. I think Nayuta survived the fall in the past and that’s why he’s stuck in the lab present day. But then who’s the Nayuta with Kanata in the current time? I’m theorizing that the current Nayuta is an apparition created from Kanata’s phantometal as that was the reason why Kanata had a nightmare about Nayuta dissolving into liquid. Maybe he knew Nayuta had died, so he uses his phantom metal to create a projection? But he can still eat, right? Or was the bowl that ramen guy was eyeing in Episode 5 Nayuta’s? All I can say is that there’s really more to Nayuta than meets the eye. I really want to know the truth.

Is phantometal corrosion the reason why Hajun is visiting a back-alley doctor? Does Hajun have symptoms? Can it be cured? I hope this illness can be explained in a future episode, because I think it makes the plot even more interesting than before. Is the Akira Ishida character the final boss of sorts?

The special ending song with Nayuta and Shiki was wonderful! I really liked it! I think the lyrics summarize their relationship perfectly. Is this a new Paradox Live song or something they had before? The special artwork was really beautiful. I’m making it the thumbnail for this review because that is way too gorgeous to pass up. Also, what I noticed was that the preview for this episode was shrouded in purple and blue last week. This makes sense as Nayuta is in cozmez and Shiki’s in TCW. I do wonder why they titled it “Love”. Are they hinted to be canon? ARE THERE EVEN ANY CANON PAIRS IN THIS STORY?

When my bunch of questions are answered, I get more. I’m getting invested in Paradox Live a lot. I can’t wait for next week as it seems to be BAE vs Akan Yatsura. I hope it’d be a good episode! What are your thoughts on this episode?

[googlyeyedsilly]

Random asks that is more an exploration of the character's relationships and lifestyle lol

1. Since we know that Radford and Kevin are friends, how do they act around each other, knowing that one of them is infected ?

2. Is Fat Thief still trying to rob Lila's attic despite being alone or did the cult chill out with the stealing instructions and let him have a break ?

3. Would Streber and Bob fight if they saw each other ? Who would win ?

4. Is the mayor still in his office admiring himself or is he too infected to care about himself anymore ?

5. Did Patty's job get more interesting ?

6. Do some of the infected just decide to continue going to their job as if nothing happened ? (Example: Jack, John and Rad)

7. Same question as 6 but for the survivors, like, does Frank still take some random kids (not infected ofc) ?

Okay, I will stop now-

Oh I love these questions!

1.

Radford actually doesn't reconize Kevin, and actually attacks him at some point. Unfortunately Kevin has to fight back by shoving a wooden pole into his back that he was given by Robert, but dont worry hes not dead.

2.

Oh none of them are actually following orders anymore since the breakout. The cult actually made a mistake, and messed up a ritual, they'll most likely try to fix it or hide somewhere until it eases over.

3.

I think it would be a fair fight, but if I had to chose it would probably be Bob but he would pay for it since Streber probably knocked him down a peg or two.

4.

Most likely too infected to care. Lol L.

5.

Oh indeed it did, since the infected are way different then just normal humans. Shes probably going to try to find a cure for the infected or try to help.

6.

No, they most likely dont even remember there normal life, but they would probably go there by feelings of familiarity or split second memorys.

7.

Nah he just focuses on surviving, much like everyone else. Though he did find the hatzgang in his van once.

Please dont hesitate to ask more!

[randomingoftherandomness]

A/N: I call this one "3 people fall a bit in love with Yuanzhi Didi and his Gege who gets jealous”

—

i. Yun Weishan

Objectively, she knows when something is beautiful. She’d been trained to be heartless and cold, but Wufeng could never quite smother out her ability to find beauty even in the most unlikeliest of moments.

Just like now, as she is sitting in Gong Yuanzhi’s laboratory sipping tea, placidly commenting on the poisons that the young man has developed.

He’s still got his edges, of that Yun Weishan has no doubts, and the likelihood of him ever fully trusting her is about as much as a snowflake’s chance in the heat of summer. She thinks it is a good survival instinct so she isn’t doing much by way of assuaging his paranoia, even if her husband has decided that sending over the strangest new herbs and plants from far and wide to his younger cousin is the best way to foster a relationship with him

“How about this one?”

She eyes the powder. “A quick death?”

“Slow.”

“Naturally.”

Gong Yuanzhi smiles. Pleased and small, and for a moment, Yun Weishan feels her breath catch in her chest at the way the watery sunlight catches on his cheek as he carefully exchanges the small dish with one that has a clear unguent.

"And this?"

Yun Weishan clears her throat and gathers her wits to study his offering. She blinks and Gong Yuanzhi cocks his head to the side as if curious.

She lowers her eyes. Best not to be caught looking at him too long.

ii. Elder Yue

Despite himself, his thirst for knowledge ultimately trumps whatever propriety or austerity he needs to keep as one of the three Elders of the family. At the heart of it, he will always be that Young Master who snuck out of the back hill to catch a glimpse of the Chuyun Chonglian grown by a prodigy in the family.

The same prodigy who is handing over a box of that same bloom.

"For you to study." Gong Yuanzhi respectfully says. This brat has always had an edge of impudence when talking to anyone who isn't his Shangjue gege. Why the sudden change of tone?

He thanks him, waving for an attendant to bring it away for storage. "Is there something you'd like in return? A gift needs to be reciprocated after all."

Gong Yuanzhi smiles. A genuine and honest one that floors Elder Yue for a beat before he surreptitiously steadies himself with a hand to the railing. Feeling heat suffuse his cheeks, he has to look away.

"I'd like to see your laboratory," Gong Yuanzhi says.

"My laboratory? It's no different than yours, I believe."

Gong Yuanzhi shakes his head, still smiling. Elder Yue thinks his own face must resemble the red of a New Year's couplet.

"I'm sure it's different." He insists. Pausing, before squirming a little. Looking a little bashful, he grows serious. "Our skills are complementary. Every poison has an antidote. Every illness has a cure. We are amongst the greatest minds in our generation. I'm sure if we put our minds together, we can come up with the solution to what the world needs."

Elder Yue purses his lips. "That... I did not expect that reasoning out of you."

Gong Yuanzhi relaxes his shoulders. "Too idealistic?"

"I would have never pegged you for it." Elder Yue counters with a soft grin. Turning, he beckons. "Come on. Follow me."

iii. Gong Ziyu

It's his first Mid-Autumn festival since ascending to the position of Sword Wielder. There's a sense of anticipation as the sound of his family fills the hall, all intermingling and chatting as they enjoy their meal.

Ah Yun is next to him, smiling as she pours him a cup of wine. Close by, he can see Jin Fan being secretly fed mooncakes by Zishang jie. Elder Xue and Elder Yue have their heads bowed, deep in conversation, while Xue Tongzi is silently drinking on his own.

The room feels full yet empty of faces that should be here. The thought sits heavy in his chest. There's still much to rebuild, much to heal and restore, but that will be a job for when the sun rises. Tonight, Ziyu is content to exist in the warmth of his family.

Then, his eyes travel to where Shangjue gege is seated with Yuanzhi didi.

There's a sense of quiet grace about them. Though they're not apart from the merriment, there's a feeling of separation. As if they exist in a world of their own and are happy to be so. Watching them a little longer, he sees the almost unspoken understanding between them; a careful chopstick serving of Yuanzhi didi's favourite dish, a pouring of wine into Shangjue gege's cup before he even asks for it. A little dance between them with steps that only they know.

Yuanzhi didi says something that has Shangjue gege smiling and that in turn has didi beaming. Happiness radiates as he leans into Shangjue. Distantly, in some part of him that still remembers the romantic notions of a youth he has left behind, he thinks that in a different life, Shangjue and Yuanzhi would make a good looking couple.

In the candlelight, Yuanzhi glows when Shangjue gege tilts his head to whisper something into his ear. His face goes slack with surprise and Yuanzhi turns to face Ziyu.

Their eyes meet across the hall. Yuanzhi is the first to smile, toasting him with his wine cup. Ziyu returns the smile and toasts him back.

+ Gong Shangjue

Gong Shangjue is not a jealous person, thank you very much.

No. He prides himself as reasonable. Logical and calm. Always thinking with his head over his heart, never being led by his emotions and always able to think things through before he acts on them.

He doesn't covet. He doesn't crave.

But when it comes to Yuanzhi didi's smiles?

Shangjue wants to hoard every single one of them for himself. Every time Didi smiles, he wants to sit and paint the exact arc that his lips takes and how it makes his eyes light up in a way that has him mesmerised. Shangjue wants to write odes and poetry, wax lyrically about how his world comes alive when Yuanzhi is by his side.

He wants to hunt down anyone Yuanzhi has shared his smiles with; wants to climb to the highest point of the mountain and shout to the world that this was his man and his alone, and no one can have him.

Heavens above, he knows he is insufferable when it comes to his little brother and he doesn’t care. The world will just have to deal with how much he loves and adores Yuanzhi.

And don’t get him started on how he calls him “Gege”.

Some days he just wants to lock Yuanzhi up next to him so that he is never out of sight. It’s ridiculous.

But then he remembers that he is the only one who gets to come home to Yuanzhi’s hugs, how Yuanzhi will always be there waiting to greet him at the end of a long journey away from the valley. Shangjue will forever be the only one to know how Yuanzhi looks tucked up against him in sleep, how he tastes when kissed in the middle of the day, how he feels when being made love to.

Shangjue reminds himself that Yuanzhi knows his blood as well as he knows his. It’s enough.

Thus, in conclusion, Gong Shangjue is absolutely not a jealous man, no. He’s just one who knows the gem that he has by his side.

[lpsgirl109]

INFO DUMP ABOUT X MEN OC SBN OW

AAAAAAAA OKOK

This is gonna be just the most basic rundown of all of them cause there's many and if I went in detail about them we'd be here forever

Alkali Ashford

Alkali was my first x men OC. Her ability is turning into dinosaurs. In her regular form, she has stripes and a tail, so she needs one of the camouflage watch things. She's besties with Kurt, but her arc is sort of opposite to his in the sense that while he wants to fit in and hide who he is, she wants to stand out and let the world know who she is. She's very fun I love her. Also fun fact this is the character that got me in trouble in that one rp server I mentioned a few nights ago, where they yelled at me because they decided shapeshifters aren't allowed only after I submitted her. They hate her because she's too swag for them to handle

Milo

This guy and the next character are basically recycled versions of ooold old OCs of mine. Milo has two water serpent things that he can control. He starts out kinda scared of them because, unlucky for him he has a fear of water due to almost drowning as a child. But overtime he learns to appreciate them

Marigold

Other aforementioned old recycled OC. Her mutation is physical in the sense that she has cat ears and angel wings, so she also needs a camouflage watch. However unlike Kurt and Alkali, she never really faced a lot of discrimination growing up because her mutation is considered beautiful by most (There's lots of angel devil comparisons with Marigold and Kurt it's so fun it's so fun). She's known Milo since they were kids because she is the one who saved him from drowning. They're dating now. Ew romance

Peter Maximoff

"Peg that's not an OC" yeah so I made an Evo version of Peter because I was STUPIDLY obsessed with this man in like 2021 idk what was wrong with me. Anyway he's the twins' half brother and I have yet to figure out what happened between Erik and his mom. He has a really dumb rivalry with Pietro its so funny

Ezekiel

Or Zeke for short. His thing is seeing and talking to ghosts. Lance recruits him to the Brotherhood for all of two seconds before Zeke befriends Kurt and jumps over to the X Men instead. He also dates Kurt later so i can live in my RogueKitty delusions but shhh

Indigo

These next few are part of the new mutant squad. Indigo's power is bringing drawings to life and she has a fun sibling relationship with Peter. They're also a little bit Too wiling to commit murder

Niko

Also a recycled old OC. He has a snake that sticks out of his back. Not much more to him yet, he just has a snake

Ozzy

Cool guy who turns into a fish person when in the water. May or may not have been inspired by Luca. Also for anyone who knows my habit of making Harry Osborn inspired OCs and naming them Ozzi. This guy is not one of the Harry clones, he came way before the raimi fixation attacked me and dragged me to hell

Markus Lang

Member of the X Men and one of the mentors alongside Ororo and Logan. He can turn into a dragon. He might end up dating Logan idk I think they'd be silly together

Gwen Ashford

Alkali's adopted younger sister who has rock powers. She's part of The Brotherhood and she is an absolute menace to society

Wyatt Elsher

This guy is able to turn into like a goop furry thing and I'm being so honest to god I based him off the fucking Transfur Outbreak game on roblox. Embarrassing. Anyway he was childhood friends with Marigold and lived in her old neighborhood, and I imagine initially his mutation was just becoming some sort of werewolf thing. Then he got sent to this lab place that claimed they'd 'cure' him but ended up fucking him up. So now he's goop. He also joins the Brotherhood and has a rivalry with Marigold

Harper

Regular ass human girl who Alkali meets at a party and falls head over heels in love with her. She also sort of adopts Kurt into her friend group after the mutants get exposed, seeing he's alone now and wanting to help him. She does guess he's also a mutant, but she's fine with it

Thats all of em!! It's entirely possible I'll make more soon, but this is who I got right now. I also have like the crumbs of a fic for these guys on wattpad but it has like one chapter that was written in 2021 and also features very shitty old art. If yall want it though I'll link it. I do plan on working on it again eventually

[the-butch-of-blaviken]

what's Keira's favourite thing about Lambert and what's Lambert's favourite thing about Keira?

Oh! That’s an interesting question!!

I think their favorite thing about each other is how much they surprise each other.

I've talked about this in passing in the tags of another post but a headcanon of mine is that when they first met, they both took one look at each other and, with a lifetime’s experience of two people for whom being able to rapidly get a general impression of what kind of person they have in front of them was sometimes a matter of survival, thought they had the other figured out. Keira pegged Lambert as a macho man with something to prove, daddy issues and a problem with authority. Lambert saw Keira as a vain and shallow woman with little concern for anyone except herself and an irritating need to always get the last word.

I'm thinking about this in the context of pre-Wild Hunt attack Kaer Morhen: Keira just arrived after Geralt suggested she took refuge in the Wolves' bastion and Vesemir, Eskel and Lambert are here to welcome her. Lambert and Keira, each thinking the other one is a dumbass, keep bickering and everyone else is like 🙄 please either stop being in the same room together or fuck it out because this is getting ridiculous

Then something happens — I haven’t decided what exactly. Maybe Lambert chances upon Keira’s notes for the cure of the Catriona plague and the alchemist in him is both intrigued and compelled, but the thought that Keira might be embarked on a humanitarian mission just isn't adding up with his preconceived idea of her, and now he needs to find out more about her. Or maybe Keira stumbles upon Lambert and the other wolf bros that night when they're shitfaced and raiding Yennefer's closet: she takes one look at him and immediately knows this isn't his first time wearing a dress, but she can't reconcile that idea with what she thought she knew of him. They're both behaving like they're standing at a conspiracy string board and have just been presented with a contradictory element, telling themselves they need to be Right about the other one and not realizing they're already strangely obsessed.

Fighting side by side and the tragic event that followed the Wild Hunt's attack bring them closer together and eventually they realize how wrong they were about each other — about the big things, obviously, but also about the little ones, like the fact that Lambert likes to sew (helps him keep his mind calm and focused), or that time Keira got so angry at a guy she punched him in the face, or those evenings where they get pleasantly drunk and talk shit about other people behind their backs. It's the small details they love most about each other, and the little ways in which they keep surprising each other

[kaisers-house-of-desires]

Okay, I know some people's thing might be Muzan or Akaza or even Douma, but imagine the stoic Kokoshibou leaning against the door, watching you get ready for your date that night, how he walks over and places his hands on your hips and litters kisses all over the exposed nape of your neck. Imagine him taking you to the festival happening in town, helping you win all sorts of prizes and when your sandal breaks suddenly, you two get separated as you stopped to take it off. And for a moment, your panicking because you see two people rapidly approaching you, with no clue who they are, when suddenly Kokoshibou grabs your hand in his, his voice coming out in a quiet whisper at the two strangers run off, "don't let go of my hand."

Now for Muzan, I can see his thing being that he considers you to be perfect, like the whole Tamayo/Yushiro (am I saying his name right?) thing so when you get very sick, he's so desperate to cure you. He stays by your side day and night, holding your hand tightly and whispering softly to you and when you finally think it's time he begs you, just begs you to let him be selfish and you agree. He turns you into his demon spouse, and no one ever disrespect you. Muzan even holds you in some sort of reverence, kissing your hand while kneeling in front of you, joining you in the hot springs to help you wash your back, kissing the nape of your neck or even leaving little marks of reminders that no other demon should try to ask you out.

For Akaza, perhaps his whole thing is that you're very fragile and he worries for you, so he follows you around to protect you because you refuse to eat humans. Then one day, a demon slayer shows up, he pegs you for a weak demon and as Akaza is about to jump in, he stops as the hunter had pushed a poor child to the ground and it was the first time he saw you genuinely angry, watched as you made this man cry just by a change of stance because he realized that you copied his technique and when that man runs off, Akaza approaches you, kissing you passionately under the full moon as he whispers how much he loves you.

- H

This is all very good food. I'm eating well tonight.

Kokoshibou is definitely a protective type, scary guard dog type. Constant subtle hand holding, always on guard but giving you the attention you need, very passionate.

Muzan: you're the only one he'd ever kneel to, practically worshipping you after your transformation. As he sees himself like a god, he in turn sees you as a god, and he'll damn well give you that respect.

Akaza: He knows damn well than to piss you off now! He would also more than likely try to find an alternative food source for you since you refuse to eat humans. He doesn't want you to be hungry after all, or have that issue with a hunter again.

[ooihcnoiwlerh]

Watching Glass Onion

My thoughts below as I watch (I was spoilered in advance and knew what would happen.  Still enjoyed it.)

-Lionel, the smartest of the Disruptors who stabbed Andi in the back, seems to think Miles is a genius when he’s clearly not from early on.  Also, Miles definitely faxes snippets he hears from other conversations and none of them are original.  Or they’re just weird brain farts that succeed only because Lionel’s able to make something salvageable out of them.

-I bet Kate Hudson had a lot of fun playing Birdie.  Her character/dynamic with Peg is like something straight out of BoJack Horseman.  (”No, they’re all in my pod, it’s fine.” and her being so deliberately obtuse/ignorant/immature.)

- Dave Bautista playing an Andrew Tate type is kind of funny in a meta sense because as far as I’ve seen, he (thankfully) doesn’t hold any of those views in real life and is just the opposite.

- Claire’s an ultimately unlikable/irredeemable character but I do like seeing Kathryn Hahn getting snarky.  Cute surprise Yo Yo Ma cameo.  I worked with a guy who cooked for him at a restaurant in DC who said that he’s really nice.

- Love the hard cut from the Disruptors getting really excited for “Miles’s” puzzles and working to solve them together to Helen looking at the puzzle, deciding “Nope.  This man and this puzzle are not worth my time and I’m not going to give him the satisfaction” and proceeding to smash the shit out of it with a hammer.

-I haven’t seen Knives Out yet (although I definitely will after this, and it had been on my list for a while) so Benoit Blanc’s accent is new and hilarious to me.  It’s the Southern equivalent to the French accents from Monty Python and the Holy Grail; ridiculous and over-the-top and funny.  More cameos

-”You’re not in the bath again, are you?” “....No.”

- The movie says so much with the different characters by how they approach wearing masks.  Blanc correctly wears a cloth mask that coordinates with his outfit.  Lionel the scientist wears a medical grade mask, also correctly.  Claire the politician wears a mask out of courtesy/image but not correctly.  Peg’s masked up and doesn’t want to hug anyone but also doesn’t say anything about how her boss Birdie is wearing a useless decorative mesh mask.  Duke and Whiskey don’t bother wearing masks at all and both they and Birdie refuse to respect social distancing.  “Andi” is holding a mask as she gets out of the cab, implying she wore it during the ride, but takes the mask off so that the other Disruptors can truly see her full image and whoever the potential murderer is doesn’t get any doubt as to who this is and, let’s be honest, other than perhaps Helen, Blanc, Peg, and Lionel, they don’t seem concerned with the pandemic.

- Either Miles Bron has and is hoarding some kind of covid cure that can be used as a throat spray or the more likely answer: it’s a placebo because he wants to get away with being careless during lockdown even more than he and the Disruptors already are and is just trying to appear like he cares about other people’s health.  It’s interesting that Blanc questions the spray and its effectiveness more than the literal scientist.  Also, another fun cameo.

-It’s subtle enough that it won’t be distracting for the audience but will amuse people who do notice that Blanc clearly doesn’t have a gag reflex, and in fairness it did make me chuckle.

- “Is that a Banksy?”  “Piece of shit.”

- That’s either not Paul McCartney’s guitar because it’s a right-handed guitar and Miles is lying about it to sound impressive or he had it re-stringed just so he could brag about owning the guitar on which Paul McCartney recorded Blackbird.  And then he unceremoniously drops it like it’s worthless after making a point to gloat about how priceless it is to Birdie.  Amazing character intro, I hate him already.

- Of course it’s the MRA meathead guy who looks the other way in regards to his girlfriend very obviously cheating on him with Miles/pimps her out to Miles so she can secure better job opportunities for him.

- Knowing the ending already I love how Ed Norton played Miles’s shock and horror and complete incomprehension at seeing “Andi.”  You see him having absolutely no idea how to process what’s going on and how despite the fact that he and Andi had known each other for ten years and he had to have known Andi had a twin sister, he clearly doesn’t think that could have anything to do with it and just thinks, “I guess I didn’t kill Andi hard enough and need to do it again?”  

- Janelle Monae looks so regal and beautiful in that dress with that “dressed to kill” poise Helen’s trying so hard to keep up despite how scared and uncomfortable she is.

-Peg and I have the same reaction to hearing Miles say “inbreathiate”

- Blanc being bewildered that everyone’s just leaving their luggage on the beach until he realizes the Disruptors just take it for granted that “the help” will do everything for them.  Not sure if that’s part of the act but still a nice touch.

- Miles Bron, barefoot, calling his fifty-person staff-estate a “commune for creativity” as a robot butler collects everyone’s luggage is probably a hard reality but it’s hilarious; also him giving people rooms “based on chakras” and Birdie being into that

-Am a little fascinated with Miles telling “Andi” that he’s glad she’s there and her reacting coldly.  Is he trying to act contrite for her “attempted” murder or trying to seem like he’s innocent and realizes that Andi isn’t falling for it?  Like, I want to know the conversation Ed Norton and Janelle Monae had before filming that interaction and ask what they felt their respective characters are thinking in that moment.

- I like how Benoit Blanc is a renowned detective but the moment he starts playing “dumb” and pretending to be naïve, Miles, who knows that Blanc’s a renowned detective, immediately falls for it.  

-For such a closely-knit friend-group, these people really don’t like each other.  The only Disruptors who seem like they’re still actually friends are Claire and Lionel.  

-HOLY SHITBALLS BLANC’S SWIM OUTFIT.  A FUCKING FULL-BODY STRIPED SWIMSUIT WITH AN ASCOT?  FUCKING FASHION ICON.  Oh, and him just standing chest-deep in the pool while holding a drink?  What an icon.  Love this guy.

-I can’t wait until Miles’s condescending speech gets used against him, especially since he throws Andi under the bus as he makes his redpill speech.  I will relish it.  

- Birdie, how many times do you need to get the hint that Blanc’s not interested and you’re making him uncomfortable?  (And he’s canonically gay but he doesn’t owe her that explanation.)

- Peg looks at “Andi” with open admiration/potentially lust and honestly, same.  Also enjoy Peg’s reaction shots.  She clearly loathes these people, including Birdie.  Really wish she’d cut her losses and quit.   

- Birdie, Blanc isn’t calling you dangerous.  He’s calling you shallow, insensitive, and careless.

- This movie, while it has some dark/dramatic moments, really is funny.  The asscheek statue, the hourly dong, Blanc panicking and throwing his cigar into the water.  

- The movie does say a lot without getting too much into it the contempt everyone has for anyone considered working class or “the help.”  Peg’s been Birdie’s loyal assistant for about a decade, has been to these get-togethers, and knows Miles and yet not only does she not even get to drink out of a glass (even if it’s not a personalized glass) he makes her drink out of a plastic cup like she’s at a frat party instead of a multi-billionaire’s estate, and has never bothered to learn her name.  And Birdie sees this, is aware of this, and doesn’t see the problem or treat Peg as a human being, either.  After a decade of putting out all of her many fires and baby-sitting her.  Lionel and Claire both have a brief blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment earlier in the movie in which they acknowledge/are nice to her but see how badly Birdie and Miles treat Peg and don’t challenge it.

-Maybe it’s because I watched Mrs. Fletcher, in which Kathryn Hahn’s character’s alcoholic beverage of choice is white wine with ice and maybe it’s because I wait on/bartend a fair amount of reasonably affluent/wealthy women who have specific instructions on how they like their white wine, but was a little amused at how Claire specifically likes “room temperature Pinot Grigio.”

- Just realized Miles probably poisoned “Andi’s” drink and it’s only because Helen is a teetotaler and also wants to keep a clear head for the evening that she survives.

-While Miles is not a mirror of every nepotism baby who has no true friends and no original ideas, it has to mean that he comes from money in that his mother took him the Louvre at the age of six when he’s an American?  I’m an American myself born in ‘93 and both of my parents worked full time but there’s not a snowball’s chance in hell that they could’ve afforded a family vacation to any location in Europe let alone Paris. Miles was likely born in the late 60s, early 70s and still would’ve had to have to have been born to fairly well-off parents.  Two of my best friends who are former roommates and international military brats were both born in ‘69 lived, briefly in Europe, and never saw the Louvre.  Also the audacity to override the Louvre’s security measures so he “doesn’t have to look at the Mona Lisa behind glass.”

- Lionel and Claire are horrified by Klear but still sign off on it for money because they’re too deep in and they keep acting like they’re the voice of reason but they  still agreed to this and even though I know the ending I keeping hoping they’ll be better than their greed.

-I could feed off of Miles’s pouting resentment and sulking both times so far Blanc has “accidentally” insulted his intellect first by calling the first-scene puzzle  “a child’s game” and for solving Miles’s murder mystery within two minutes of hearing about it and with no clues whatsoever.  It’s especially funny since everyone’s praising Miles’s intellect when it’s made explicitly clear that he didn’t design the puzzle nor did he write out the murder mystery and yet still is so entitled he acts as though his intellect, which is nonexistent and he didn’t lend to either of these things, has been undermined.  And that Blanc, still playing the naïve and socially inept goof, is well aware of the fact that his comments and intellect bruise Miles’s narcissistic and yet fragile ego and is probably having a lot of fun doing it.

- Janelle Monae having a couple of moments where you hear a little bit of Helen’s natural Southern accent when she’s really upset as she’s masquerading as Andi is *chef’s kiss* and Andi probably also had a little bit of a hidden Southern accent that probably came out in small doses during emotional or vulnerable moments so it’s not surprising that it wouldn’t be a tell.

- “I want the truth!”

-Miles did in fact hand Duke the drink that killed him.  Also, a bit fitting that a man with a deathly food allergy to a common food item insists on keeping a gun on him even when swimming but never bothers to carry at least one epi pen.

-Miles literally murdered a man and is shocked that a detective thinks to call the cops this is incredible.

- I appreciate how, except for his girlfriend who didn’t even like him very much, all of Duke’s friends are more concerned for how it will look for their reputations to be associated with his death even as an innocent standby than the fact that he died.  And once again, the moment anything doesn’t go exactly his way, Miles panics and goes on impulse instead of thinking anything through and only kind of stumbles onto something afterwards.  Also, him scampering off the moment anyone other than Benoit approaches Duke’s corpse.  He’s so bad at hiding anything!  It’s incredible he gets away with so much

- I was prepared for this but it really is delightful that Blanc has a posh English husband played by Hugh Grant who spends quarantine making sourdough starter.  Also a cute little costuming detail that Blanc gets fully dressed, complete with a necktie to meet with Helen, but still wears a bathrobe over his clothes.

- Janelle Monae’s consistent, realistic Southern accent as Helen that does sound like it’s from one specific region from the South vs Daniel Craig’s hilarious, all-over-the-place Foghorn Leghorn Southern accent.  Let’s discuss.

- “Heavens.  The dog ate the caviar again.”

- Helen is so goddamn brave and I love her. 

- The fact that Miles is such an inept and clueless murderer who only gets by on privilege and luck that Blanc doesn’t suspect Miles as Andi’s killer because it would be too inept and dumb of a murder, though

- It does kind of make me wonder--did Lionel and Claire want to be a positive force in the world once?  Were they better people before easy money from Miles made them take ethical shortcuts or were they always weak and corruptible people who just wanted a meal ticket?  They’re clearly more conflicted about Miles’s actions than Duke and Birdie and feel more guilty about betraying Andi, but they still chose money and convenience over ethics.  I mean, that’s a big message of this movie; these morally questionable/bankrupt people at times wanted to do the right thing, but chose greed and corruption over their conscience.  But I guess I liked Leslie Odom  Jr’s and Kathryn Hahn’s performances so much that I was curious as to their approaches to the roles and how they took their respective characters’ corruption.

- Helen being  terrified because of the high risks as well as getting seasick as well as accidentally getting tipsy because she didn’t realize the kombucha she was drinking had alcohol in it and still managing to mostly confuse everyone is amazing and shows not just her intellect and quick thinking but the love and commitment she has for her twin no matter how uncomfortable the situation gets.  Blanc says himself that she has a natural talent for sleuthing.

- “That is hahd kamboocha!  That is Jared Letos’ hahd kamboocha!”

- Oh heavens, the foreshadowing.

- the detail that Serena Williams is one of the world’s greatest living athletes and Miles still hires her to do nothing except do personal training if someone is there did get a chuckle out of me

- “If I ever meet Jared Leto, I’m gonna whoop his kombucha-brewing ass”-Helen realizing she accidentally got tipsy off of his kombucha and also I would watch Helen beat the living shit out of Jared Leto

- I know the only redeemable characters in this movie, realistically, are Helen, Andi, and Blanc but I do feel bad for Peg.

-”Birdie...please tell me you did not think sweatshops are where they make...sweatpants.”  *Annoyed, unapologetic shrug.*  “Oh my Go-o-od.”

- Andi’s notebook indirectly saving Helen is apparently a parallel to Knives Out, in which a prop shows the heroine surviving killing odds because of someone who loved them.  Again, I need to watch Knives Out.

- “Miles Bron is an idiot.” “No one tried to kill you, you vainglorious buffoon.” 

- A bit depressing that Peg and Whiskey, who didn’t actively stab Andi in the back, are still imbued enough with the Disruptors that they also ignore any kind of conscience they have for greater opportunities, but not surprising.

- Miles looking at Helen, again, undoubtedly knowing that Andi had a twin sister, and clearly thinking, “What the fuck, is Andi a terminator?  How many times do I have to kill her??”

- Miles is so reckless, egotistical, and fucking dumb.  He specifically asked for people’s food allergies and killed Duke in front of their friends with  his own food allergy and only succeeded because Duke was too proud to carry a couple of epi pens in case of an emergency.  This is on top of the fact that he murdered his high-profile former friend and business partner all because he just assumed it would be covered up because he’s a multi-billionaire and he thinks everyone is as much of an idiot as he is.  “No!  It’s just dumb!” indeed.  It doesn’t even occur to him that it’s Helen who’s alive in front of him until Blanc spells it out and you can tell from his reactions.

- Speaking of which, Ed Norton eats in this movie.  He’s amazing as a sleazy, smug, greedy, narcissistic scumbag.  I love to hate him every moment he’s on screen and he’s always great as a villain but especially in this.

- “Heavens to...you dimwitted, brainless jackass!  Your one murder with any panache at all, and you stole the whole idea from me!”  

-  Miles doesn’t even get the idea to burn the napkin on his own.  Lionel, completely and justifiably mystified, goes, “You didn’t just...burn it?”

- Oh, but how cowardly the Disruptors are when they think Miles will win everything even though they know he’s a monster and are horrified by what he did.

-”Totally circumspective evidence”--Benoit rolling his eyes.  Same.  Also, apparently Miles Bron is not based on Elon Musk and their similarities are coincidental but Elon Musk stans saw this dumb fucking loser and went, “This talentless, unoriginal, evil person is definitely my precious boy” and that is amazing.

-Oh, but how incredible it is, that moment in Helen’s eyes that go from heartbreak and grief and anger, knowing she’ll never get proper justice for Andi to that moment of, “But fuck it.  Revenge is also a viable solution.”  I could live in it.  That switch in which she’s like, “He’ll never be held accountable for literal murder.  Time to burn it all down” and in fact does.  

-Also turns out I was wrong about the poisoned whiskey soda theory--she drinks it and then raises hell.  Miles is just so dumb, impulsive, and reckless I didn’t put it past him.

-I also like that Blanc realizes that proper legal justice is futile but also that Miles deserves every negative thing coming his way and knows when to let Helen take the reigns.

- “You would lie for a lie but you wouldn’t lie for the truth?”

- No, Whiskey.  You don’t get to try to kill Helen and screw her over and act like you’re friends and comrades.  Same goes for the rest of you shitheads.  And yet the fact that these people never truly liked Miles shines through makes them all feel empowered up to a certain point until they realize that their cowardice and greed and association with him will cost them personally and then they become cowards again.

- Self-fulfilling prophecy, Miles, you motherfucker.  Also the transition from him being completely unfazed (both by Helen breaking the ugly glass sculptures and the fact that everyone joins in at first and that none of his friends actually like him) to horror is deeply satisfying to watch. Everyone goes, “But you went too far” as if Miles didn’t literally murder Helen’s sister after stealing credit for her life’s work.  No, actually.  She’s the only real disruptor here

-She fucking blows up the Glass Onion!  (also Blanc just handing Klear to her like, “I won’t, but you should.”)

- Is Daryl meant to be a metaphor for Covid?  He enters the picture with a case of Coronas going, “I’m not here” and is there when Helen blows up the Glass Onion because no way is the throat coat actually going to protect any of these people from, Covid and chances are Birdie (and Peg, by association) Duke, Whiskey or Miles (or maybe Claire) infected everyone.

- His one-of-a-kind car that follows him everywhere is ruined too.  Good.

-I can’t tell you how hard I laughed when Miles realizes that he rented the Mona Lisa and it’s on fire so now he’ll forever be known as the man who destroyed one of Europe’s greatest paintings.  Also I know there’s discourse on whether or not it’s the actual Mona Lisa.  For the sake of this movie I’ll say it is; the Louvre was that impressed with Miles’s money and that the catharsis is that, in the Knives Out universe, that Miles ruined his own image by ruining the Mona Lisa.

-I know it’s a movie but Helen running on broken glass while wearing sandals freaked me out for a moment, even though it is pretty urgent.

“You’ll forever be remembered in the same breath as the Mona Lisa.”

- Oh wait Helen had to point out to him that he’ll forever be known as the guy who destroyed the Mona Lisa.  Amazing.

-This has been pointed out before but I did see what you did there: Cassandra predicted the fall of Troy despite no one believing her and Helen precipitated it.

- They’ll all burn him to save themselves now that he’s not their sugar daddy, which is obvious.  I’m kind of curious to see how they’d try to salvage their careers after this, but I’m pretty sure we won’t find out.  Benoit Blanc movies so far work like Mad Max movies, and he’ll be the ally/helper to another working class woman who exposes a corrupt and greedy wealthy group of people and any Helen/Marta fanfics will be strictly on AO3.  And here.  Also I’m here for it.

-Miles Bron you fucking idiot.  You piece of shit.  Hell’s bells you really actively planned to murder your former business partner/best friend as you sent her a puzzle invitation to celebrate a murder mystery-themed party.  I...incredible.  Not in a good way.  In a “bought the Mona Lisa on a whim and let it burn to the ground” kind of way.

- Okay, I know the look on Helen’s face is meant to be a million things, because it evokes the Mona Lisa but still.  As far as she knows, since she wasn’t there to hear that the Disruptors have agreed to burn Miles in court, she didn’t really get to clear her sister’s name and that’s probably the biggest source of pain for her.  That  said she did get to obstruct a deeply dangerous fuel source by the incompetent piece of shit that murdered her sister and ruin his public image.  It’s probably a mix of catharsis and a lack of it.  Either way, I enjoyed the movie and will watch it again as well as Knives Out.