skummell

[remyxavierr]

Imagine being a Blackpink or Jennie stan and thinking that Zico's new song is only doing well thanks to her LMAOOOOOOO!!!!! As if everything Zico touches doesn't turn to gold, get the fuck outta here with your shit. He has so many accolades, he's written and produced for himself, Block B, and many other artists (including PSY, which I know you silly bitches love jamming to a PSY song!), he's signed and developed a male Kpop group who is KILLING IT, by the way, and Zico has always continued to grow in his music and doesn't make shit that sounds the same (cough cough BP) and it's always a hit no matter which direction of style he goes in! That's why his songs hit the top of the charts! So give credit where it's due, dude. Sure, Black Pink has made catchy songs, and they found a style that worked and they played the shit out of it, but Zico keeps it fresh and it always works. He's so talented and that much is clear. Jennie should be so lucky she got to feature on a Zico song. She should be grateful to Zico, KOZ, and HYBE. It's easy to become a solo artist and then be forgotten if you don't put out memorable work, so this is going to help her out a lot.

Zico's new song, SPOT, featuring Jennie from Blackpink, is great, and I never expected anything less from him. He always delivers!

[ange-reveur]

                HAON   -   GRADUATION   FT.   VINXEN.  &   WEBSTER B

[inthispagewestanikon]

Special Scenario - MINO “Fiancé” part 2

I’m back with part 2, it took long enough lol but I hope you enjoy <33

Word count: 2.202

Mino’s POV

After I left the building and stared as she went her way I felt as if the world had stopped completely, maybe I haven’t even fully processed what had happened inside that elevator; it’s like I’ve waited for this moment for so long and now that it happened I don’t even know what to do with myself.

I saw a taxi pull over and a lady came out so I rushed to get to it before it took off. As I sat down in the car and the driver asked me where we were going I kind of stuttered before the adress to my studio just rolled out of my mouth. 

The ride wasn’t long and it wasn’t expensive. I got off and entered the building where my studio was located, I greeted the doorman and entered yet another  elevator, as soon as I did the memories rushed back and it hit me...I had kissed my ex who I’ve been in love since my school days and in a few days she is going to be someone else’s wife. I laughed out of dispair, I remember this one night specifically which we were at a park and we were laying on the bench and we told each other that we’d get married for sure when I made enough money as a rapper...at least one part of it came true. 

I got off the elevator and walked to my door, typed the passcode and finally was in my safe haven, I could now be myself and just let every and any feeling pour out. I saw a pen and doodled over a paper going through the scene one more type and the word 'fiancé’ kind of come out in the paper and I added ‘my’ in front of it and chuckled at how childish that look so I said the words out loud and a depressed feel came along, it was funny and sad.

I started working on the beats I was producing for my new album but for the past 2 hours I have been doing that all of them sounded like trash to me. I stretched my arms and the paper came into my field of vision, the words “my fiancé” written down and a melody hit me. 

I stood up and went over to the piano playing some lines trying to give life to what was in my head, when I got the base down I went back to the computer and started adjusting and adding more things. I came across this old folk song and it was like it tied everything together, so I sampled it and worked it into the base from the piano. 

After a few hours I had the whole melody down and I loved it, now it was time to figure out with the lyrics. As I was getting ready to go into that I got a call, Zico’s name popped up in the screen and I picked up.

“Oh, yes Hyung..What’s up?” I said.

“Mino-ya, what are you doing?” He asked.

“At the studio” I replied and he laughed.

“Yah, go out and get some air, you’re there everyday” I laughed at his advice.

“Look who’s saying that” I laughed more “Ah, that was funny...yes hyung I’ll do that” 

“You better!” He warned in a joking tone “I’m hanging up now, bye”

“Bye hyung, take care” I said. 

Even though I’d love to do exactly what he told me to I just couldn’t stop now, I was in the zone and don’t want to get out of it and I’m sure he is the one who’d 100% understand that so I went back to my lyrics.

On the same doddled paper I started by writing random words, the process of creating lyrics was harder than the beats because it hss to rhyme, it has to go well with the melody and it need to make sense whilst the beat is more of a feeling. 

Two hours went by and all I had were doddles and the same two words. The sky was dark and I knew I had been in there for too long. Maybe it was time for fresh air and some food, I realized I hadn’t eaten since I left the restaurant earlier. 

I left the studio room and made my way to the elevator while stretching my back, after hours sitting it sure was aching. I pressed the button and the doors opened, I entered and was about to go on my phone, just when I unlocked the scene hit me and the sentence “stop playing around and just be with me” came into my mind and the doors were about to close so I frantically pressed the button to open the door and ran back to my studio. 

I sat down and picked up the pen writing down that sentence and from then on the rest just rolled out. My handwriting looked like shit because my thoughts were moving faster than my hands could move but in like 15 minutes I had the lyrics down.

“Knock knock I miss you But I can’t have you (So, sad) Drip drip I pour out my tears But you still hide your fine figure (You’re so mean) You’re friendly to others, but chic towards me Where’s all the stars in Seoul Oh, in your eyes When you’re with him you’re in Dystopia If you follow me it’s Utopia [Hook] Pretty woman Wo wo you’re so elegant I look at you from all angles, and you’re still so pretty I’ve just realized, my woman Woman, my blue bird  Hide well my lady (My lady) I can see your hair, where are you Where are you? I can’t find you, come out (Come out, come out wherever you are) I’ll go wherever you are, I’ll go [Verse 2] Shh don’t stay a word, let’s just run away Stop playing around and just be with me During the summer I just want to walk in your eyes We’re both risqué, risky risky oh I miss your body, and I’m lonely Help feed this thirsty dog Don’t be embarrassed like a coiled up cobra, alright? [Hook] Pretty woman Wo wo you’re so elegant I look at you from all angles, and you’re still so pretty I’ve just realized, my woman Woman, my blue bird  Hide well my lady (My lady) I can see your hair, where are you Where are you? I can’t find you, come out (Come out, come out wherever you are) I’ll go wherever you are, I’ll go [Verse 3] You’re a pie in the sky Woo, I swallow my spit  You’re my main, I’m your chewing gum Woo, let’s boogie on & on We’re on fire, I can finally breathe, I’m all for you Beautiful you’re pretty, pretty

Come out come out wherever you are  I’ll, go  Come out come out wherever you are I’ll go wherever you are I’ll go

Now all that’s left is recording the lyrics and add it on top of the beat. 

I started recording it but it wasn’t sounding right. I took several breaks and walked in circles around the room trying to figure out the tone, nothing. I listented to the beat again and again, but still it wasn’t right.  Honestly, this wasn’t  just a song, I was sending a message, it was my answer to this fucking marriage and I wanted her to get it as soon as she listened to it.

I sat there in deep thought fow a while and I started mumbling the words until I finally got how the chorus would sound, so I started from there and the excitment from that part being just right led me to recording the rest of the song. 

I was almost 7AM when the demo was complete. I hadn’t had any sleep, but the song was ready and I wanted to get it to YG as soon as I could. I didn’t care I looked like shit, I just got inside a taxi and head over to YG building. 

I went up to the producers room and told them I had something good for the next realease. So I played the demo on my phone and by the look on their faces, I did great.

“Mino ya, this is a single, really” one of the producers said.

“Yah let’s take it to president Yang” The other one added.

“wah, I’m so glad you liked it, I worked on it all night” I smiled.

“Yeah, we can see” We all laughed.

They then called in his office to schedule a meeting and while that was being taken care of by the secretaries we all went to the cafeteria to eat something and a meal was indeed much need because I was running on coffee since yesterday.

“Yah mino, you need to watch your health” one of them said as we were eating.

“yes you need to listen to your hyungs” the other added.

“yes yes” I said while bowing in apology.

We finished the meal and were hanging out at their studio room when the president called us up to his office. 

Once we got there the receptionist said we could enter the room as he was already waiting for us.

“Oh, Mino! How you’ve been?” YG greeted me.

“Hello! I am good” I bowed.

“Glad to hear! So, I’ve heard from these guys that you have something good for me, let’s hear it” He said and I immediately pulled out my phone and played the song.

The room was quiet for about 30 seconds before YG gave that smile he has when he likes something and I could finally breathe again. 

“This is good material, Mino, really” He said “That’s a single” He complemented and I smiled a bit flustered with the compliment.

“Thank you, Presindent” I bowed. 

“Of course, few adjustments here and there and it’ll top the charts for sure” YG remarked “Actually, let’s release a full album” After he said that my soul left my body and came back, a full album? Is he serious? Has he gone insane?

“P-President, is this a joke?” I asked innocently.

“Of course not” He laughed “You’re surprised, right? Well, you’re one of our greatest artists, you always bring good material both solo and for WINNER, so I want to give you the chance. Do you think you can do it?” He finished and looked at me with a raised eyebrow. 

“Of course I can! Thank you so much, Presidente, for this opportunity I promise I’ll do good” I bowed and was sincerely moved by the trust he was putting in me. I have waited for this chance for a long time and knowing the President of the company trusts me enough to realeae a full album is amazing. 

We left the room after chatting for some more about group activities and producing for others artists and I was on cloud 9. 

(...)

The next two months went by so quickly, I was in meeting after meeting, recording after recording, everything to get this album to perfection. There was going to be 12 songs that I, myself, composed and produced.The work I put into this was immense I couldn’t wait to put it out there for my fans to listen and for her. I also filmed a music video and the preparation was exhausting, but this meant more than just awards and charts, I kept thinking that if I couldn’t relay this message to her with words I’d do it through art, which is the one thing that might have kept me from sinking low after the news that the one and only woman I’ve ever loved will soon carry another guy’s last name.

(...)

The wedding was a month away now and the single realese date was due to two weeks before the cerimony. I peeked at the date engraved on that envelope “10/12/2018″  I still couldn’t wrap my head around it and even if I buried myself in work that kiss was what started it all. The questions in my head kept me up at night and she was all I could think about. “Is this how this it’s going to end? Is this a “the one that got away situation”? What if she still loves me and is waiting for me to say something? If so, what can I say?” It was like this all day everyday and I got absolutely no answer whatsoever.

(...)

26/11/2018 came and the music video was released, I was pumped but the whole time I keep thinking about what she was thinking and then an idea came to my mind. I grabbed my phone and copied the link to the video and searched through my contacts until I found who I was looking for, hers.

I sent the link along with no context, if I did all this so my art could speak for me then there were no words that I could say to her and after all the years we’ve known each other, I know she’ll get it, she always gets it because she, like no one else, gets me.

Sooo, it took me long enough so I made up for it with a long part and I didn’t want to say anything but there is room for a part 3 idk you guys let me know...

Anyways, hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing <33 I promise not to take 2 years to update this lol,

Ana.

[incorrectenhypenquotes]

What do you think about the producers?

been a fan of zico for years and Rain/Bi’s a whole icon, and obviously hitman bang is my i-land bias. Beyond that Son Sung Deuk has made some of my favorite kpop choreos ever (like every single one he did for txt) and Pdogg and Wonderkid are both great producers (wonderkidd made txt’s cant we just leave the monster alive which is *chefs kiss* and pdogg made blood sweat and tears which is to date my favorite bts era) and i didn’t know who DOOBU was but apparently he trained twice and got7 and a bunch of other so yeah wild.

Beyond that I just wish that the producers did more with the boys. Like we’ve had Bi dance with the grounders once and that’s the most interaction we’ve gotten, like i don;t just wanna see them give the boys feedback and then fuck off, most of these boy have barely trained over a year and they very obviously still need training so i just don’t get why they aren’t being properly mentored like?? For what reason?? Yes that woman who was there for the special episodes has apparently been doing vocal coaching with them which is great and I wanna see it in the show, but i’d like to see them get properly trained on every other aspect as well.

[yeoldontknow]

🎶 top 10 kpop songs 🎵

i was tagged by @stolenjendeukie @ditzymax and @serenililly and i think @red-exo to do this. thank you angels! i hate it! 

this is impossible. i've been thinking about this from the moment i got tagged the first time and i'm so stressed. i can barely pick fave music in any order let alone ONLY TEN. yikes. ok well here we go! 

going under a cut to not clog dashes!p because i talked a lot!

EXO - White Noise ~ when i was getting back into kpop i found this song after listening to monster and i...lost my mind. i'm pretty sure white noise is the reason i'm an exo stan. i listened only this song for a solid three months. i couldn't get enough of it. still can't. when i tell you it's a perfect song in every way, i mean that with every fiber of my spirit

BTS - Cypher 4 ~ i once broke a couch at karaoke to this song. i really don't think any more needs to be said about this other than the fact that i am deeply, deeply embittered i will never see this song live.

SHINee - Sherlock (Clue + Note) ~ barring taemins unfortunate hair in this video, there are few things that really set me off the way this song does. shinee were my first kpop band ever, and taemin was my first bias before i even know that was a term or a thing. when i heard this song i was confident pop music was saved. i still think shinee saved pop music and i will fight that point to the death.

f(x) - Nu Abo ~ literally this song is nine fucking years old and sounds like it was produced yesterday. its centuries ahead of its time and i'm perpetually in a stampede every time i listen to it. there will never be a decade where this song is not good or impressive and you can stamp that on my fucking grave.

CL - Hello Bitches ~ this is one of those songs that if you said ‘sing a kpop song or this is IT’ i'd bust this out and get free shots in the process. i once nearly broke an elliptical listening to this. who would we become if CL was in our mirrors every morning amping us up by aggressively giving precisely -300 fucks? idk but i think that's my next pokémon evolution.

Zico - Bermuda Triangle ~ talk about an experience. this song makes me feel like i'm strapped time a comet ready to break the planet by the sheer force of my hype. another karaoke jam, i have to listen to this at least once a week or the fabric of my reality collapses.

SEVENTEEN - Habit ~ the first time i heard this song i was on a train and when the chorus hit and that muted timpani clash in the back exploded i was so overcome with emotion i could barely process my existence up until that moment. this is the audio personification of ‘i showed you my heart, please respond’ for me. like this immediately gets me so deep in my feels it's like i'm drowning. 

Sister - Touch My Body ~ my party jam. i'd done so many shots to this song, so many drunken nights to this song like what a jam? i love ladies who demand the love they deserve and party while doing it. it's such pure, unashamed pop that you cannot help but adore it.

Chen - Love Words ~ this song moves me, truly. it speaks for itself literally always and i have such special memories of walking through a rainy street in tokyo listening to it feeling so love sick and heart touched. it's a g i f t. i am showing you my heart and soul sir please respond

Taemin - Want ~ i love sin.

honorable mentions:

NCT 127 - Firetruck

Girl’s Day - Something

Red Velvet - Kingdom Come

EXID - Up & Down

BEG - Abracadabra 

Super Junior - Sorry Sorry

EXO - Sweet Lies (i love more sin)

EXO-SC - Daydreamin (this could and should be number one but it's way too personal to actually talk about so just know there are few things in this universe i love as much as this song)

BTS - Outro: House Of Cards

GOT7 - My Swagger ~ my FIRST cease and desist notice to yugyeom which he promptly ignored

G.Soul - Circles

tagging: @yehet-me-up @gingersaysjump @kyungseokie @queenoftheimpala @baekwell--tart @baekphia @imdifferentshadesofpurple @x-exo @ninibears-erigom @fairyyeols @iq-biased @taestfully @taetaetrashhh @readyplayerhobi @seoulmap @chengf and anyone who wants to do this! but as always please only do it if you want to 💗

[deantrblh]

 ►─═ 𝕊𝕥𝕦𝕕𝕚𝕠 𝕊𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕚𝕠𝕟:𝔽𝔸ℕ𝕏𝕐  ℂℍ𝕀𝕃𝔻 𝔼𝔻𝕀𝕋𝕀𝕆ℕ  ═─◄

        “So we’re really gonna do this? Like this isn’t a joke?” Dean asked as he looked at his four friends that were currently in his studio. “Cause if we are gonna do this we need to be all in.” he stated sternly, looking around the room. Zico, Crush, Millic, and Penomeco had came off of a fourteen hour flight from Korea earlier in the morning to support Dean’s upcoming solo album. The four men were staying for a few weeks an they decided to make an impromptu little music group.

   “Well duh? I just finished a another album out in Korea, as well as Penomeco. We wanna make music with you cause like bro you and Crush got the fucking vocals.” Zico spoke up, dragging the joint that was in his hand. “Penomeco can sing and rap and I can rap. Millic is a bomb ass producer. I don’t see why not.” 

   “Zico’s right. We are all musically compatible in the way that if we make this little group we can really start some trends while having a good ass time.” Crush chimed in, sitting up and grabbing his phone. “We aren’t gonna be a boy group or whatever because like..that’s just not us. Think of us as more a group of friends who just fuck around in the studio making hits. Simple. Not all the glitzy shit Luna and Jackson ( @lunaparx and @jvcksonwng​) are doing. Much respect to them for doing all that though. Shit’s rough.” Dean couldn’t help but laugh at that. The whole boy group thing never interested him. Back in Korea he got plenty of offers to join groups but he just opted to stay as a singer/producer and a songwriter. 

    That didn’t mean he didn’t write a few Kpop boy band hits for some groups, but he kept that under his songwriting belt. Leaning back in his leather swirly chair he ran his hand down his face, groaning. “Fine...i mean what the hell? Let’s fuckin do this.” Slapping his knee he got up and pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniels from his fridge. “Let’s fuckin’ celebrate the birth of FANXY CHILD and drink. If ya’ll got ideas then let’s try and bust a song out tonight.” Raising the bottle he opened it, taking a long swig before passing it to Millic. 

   It wasn’t a huge surprise to anyone that Dean loved alcohol, all of his friends loved it as well. It also got some of their creative juices flowing as well. Dimming the lights in the room he changed the color to purple and blue, setting a chill vibe before he cut on some music.

   Three drunken hours later, The five men in the studio had somehow made a beat and were now brainstorming, well free styling, lyrics along with the beat. “Your girlfriend shakes at my name, yeah. Jealousy is harmful for your health, get away.” Dean sings out in Korean, causing a few ‘ooh’s’ and ‘ahh’s’ from around the studio. He can’t help but laugh, he was too far gone but he was surrounded by some of his best friends and he couldn’t ask for anything else.

[jaehyunpeachy]

i am you // you are me - yoonkook - 5k

some weird soulmate shit happens.

read: yoongi keeps running into this cute cashier boy. and they keep matching?

(music to listen: 1. belief - mabinc 2. i am you you are me - zico 3. soulmate - zico ft. iu)

man, seoul has a completely different atmosphere and air to it - way different than in daegu. literally, the air smells different here and yoongi thinks it’s not necessarily a bad thing, but the fact that he notices this small and random detail just makes him a little more depressed because he longs for his cozy home back in good ole d-town.

he’s lounging in a flimsy lawn chair on his apartment balcony and distastefully sniffs the stuffy seoul air again. his mind wanders back to old, familiar places - the bustling family restaurant, his mom’s soothing voice, his father beckoning him to taste the family’s famous galbi-jjim , his brother’s annoying method of showing affection via noogies when yoongi grudgingly accepts his chores for the day.

the fond memories in his head are juxtaposed with the outside sound and sight of the bustling nighttime atmosphere. everything in seoul is so,fast-paced , even the night life, which he can clearly see from his vantage point. he hasn’t really gotten used to it all, more like, barely tolerating it. he’s kinda stubbornly refusing to settle completely which serves to make him more homesick and then he’s stuck in this cycle of stubbornness and nostalgia and longing and stubbornness and nostalgia and longing.

yoongi breaks his nostalgic reverie when he stands up, the chair loudly scraping against the floor. if he’s going to drown himself in memories and be a sad, depressed sack he might as well do it right - with some alcohol.

he checks the fridge to grab a can of beer but fuck - he’s out. all that’s left is a pack of sliced turkey meat, a sad pile of lettuce, a lone half-empty gallon of milk, and a fully empty carton that used to hold eggs.

damn, his produce is mocking him.

just a few hours ago when he opened his fridge he saw the same turkey, lettuce, milk, and egg carton and the word minimalism smugly appeared in his head. yoongi prides himself on not being wasteful; he’s able to use each and every one of his ingredients until they’re completely gone, thank you very much.

but seeing as he’s in a less than ideal mood to be holed up at home and he has a dire need of alcohol, yoongi tears his eyes away from his sad produce, grabs his wallet and keys, and wrestles himself into a big sweater to combat the chilly night-time seoul air. he grumbles as he steps out of his apartment complex. daegu was always on the warmer side. who knows, maybe the seoul air will help clear his head. maybe.

yoongi finds himself deep in thought as he’s walking, a result of his melancholy mood and the atmosphere of night probably. as a result, he doesn’t realize that he’s actually not walking in the direction of the nearest 7-eleven. when he hears the distant sound of a car angrily honking five times - goddamn, chill - he’s shaken out of his thoughts and glances at his surroundings.

nice. he’s in a random alley.

well, way to go min yoongi. this night is just continually fucking with him and becoming more and more disappointing. he takes a minute to inwardly curse at himself for his obliviousness before he has the smart idea of grabbing his phone out his pocket. he googles the nearest convenience store. the top result is ten yards from his current location.

he rounds a corner and walks a few paces before he spots it. only a single neon sign that reads “ level” adorns its storefront and he assumes that’s what the store is called. yoongi power walks toward it, through the front door, and straight towards where he thinks they should be keeping the alcohol because dammit, he is a man on a mission.

somewhere on the other end of the store, which isn’t actually far from where yoongi stands now, the clock goes from 11:59 to 12:00.

yoongi surveys his surroundings. he’s bombarded with neon colors from every angle, which makes the store feel bigger than it actually is. from the outside, it looked cramped and dull and drab and not colorful. due to this very misleading outward appearance, yoongi immediately thinks that this is exactly the type of store that is empty seventy-five percent of the time and will most likely be out of business within the next month.

okay, it is midnight, but yoongi can tell when a store is being frequented or not, in this case: not. it’s the only possible explanation as to why his sneakers squeak so unusually loud on the unusually pristine tiles.

he strides towards the refrigerated area and for some reason, he feels a strange sense of familiarity, like he’s been here before; a type of vague awareness that comes from something like a dream.

actually, yoongi’s seen stores like this before. namjoon has a very cultured and particular sense of tumblr aesthetic and this store fits the bill perfectly.

yoongi chalks that niggling feeling as a latent reaction to all the posts he witnessed namjoon reblogging to his tumblr, as they sat on the couch on their respective phones. he’s suddenly bitter again because now, with his current situation and location , he can’t even call namjoon out for trying to be hipster because he’s too far away to even see namjoon or his stupid hipster-aesthetic-whatever tumblr in person.

yoongi spots the alcohol, finally, and grabs two - he hesitates and turns around - three bottles of the brand he likes and walks to the checkout station.

well fuck, he was hoping for a some sort of self-checkout machine - this is seoul, the largest metropolis of korea after all - but he should have known not to expect anything when he set foot inside.

god, he’s too impatient and drained and sad to deal with another human being but sucks up his feelings once again as he steps up to the counter. no one is actually there and yoongi spots a bell and rings it twice. a couple more times, more insistently, for good measure. suddenly he feels his phone buzz in his pocket. he checks and sees it’s from namjoon.

at that moment someone stumbles out of the ‘employees only’ door and utters a quick apology for making yoongi wait.

yoongi quickly glances up from the phone and sees that the cashier is a young twenty-something boy. all he sees is a mop of soft brown hair and just under it, a pair of soft brown eyes which he unwittingly makes eye contact with. but suddenly it is broken - the cashier beginning to ring up yoongi’s items, and yoongi looking back at his phone.

dance monster [12:10 am]

hyung

you’ll never guess wat happend today

me [12:10 am]

what

dance monster [12:11 am]

so u kno that tattoo i got a while back ????

me [12:11 am]

joon ur gonna have to be a little more specific

dance monster [12:11 am]

ok ok that one on my wrist !

the moon one !!1!1 !

me [12:11 am]

so...what

dance monster [12:11 am]

idek hyung like

ok fuck

this sounds so weird but like

for some reason i woke up this morning

me [12:11 am]

a goddamn miracle

dance monster [12:12 am]

shut up hyung

anyway i woke up

and now i have a new sun tattoo

me [12:12 am]

wait

what

dance monster [12:12 am]

idk !!! hyung idek wats goin on ajoer

i think it’d be better if u called me

asklejroijga

“excuse me?”

right, yoongi still needs to pay for his things. he jams his phone into his back pocket and fishes for his wallet. he awkwardly fumbles for some bills, “ah, sorry - here you go,” and all but flings them on the counter in his haste to get back to his conversation with namjoon and to go back home and avoid strangers altogether, let alone semi-attractive strangers.

it looks like his original plan of drowning in sorrow will have to be put on hold. nonetheless, he welcomes the new interruption in the form of his dear friend.

right as yoongi’s about to exit the store, the cashier calls out to him.

“um,” he pauses cutely, “nice sweater.”

yoongi looks down. it’s an old number, one that jimin got for him as a christmas present. it’s kinda not his style because it’s colorblocked - well, color in general - but it’s the first thing he found as he left his apartment and it’s oversized and it’s a gift. from jimin. so.

he looks up again and sees the exact same sweater on the cashier.

o-kay. what a coincidence.

at this moment, yoongi gets a really good look at the twenty-something cashier boy. well, as good of a look as he can seeing as half of cashier boy’s body is obscured by the counter.

the cashier is clearly taller and bigger than yoongi but the sweater still looks oversized and his fingers just barely peek out from under the sleeves. yoongi gets a good look at cashier boy’s doe eyes and button nose and his whole look just screams soft.   fuck semi-attractive. this guy is possibly the most attractive guy yoongi has ever seen. the most attractive person in seoul, by far. at least to yoongi’s standards. and this is only the visible half - yoongi gulps - doesn’t even want to think about anything lower than that.

he eloquently chokes out a word. “cool.”

real smooth, min yoongi.

well, time’s up. yoongi’s just about done with social interaction and he’s itching to get home and he wants to maybe forget this whole thing because goddamn, he’s awkward and the cashier is cute.

cashier boy blinks and fuck, yoongi can see his eyelashes from here. and then, cashier boy smiles , all twinkling eyes and soft lips, “have a nice evening, sir.”

yoongi bolts out of the door.

/

jungkook just barely managed to keep his fluster in check. he tried to not to stare at the strange man’s silvery hair, or at his sharp profile, or at his attractive piercings, three silver hoops on each ear - fuck, since when did jungkook find piercings on anyone but himself attractive?

but the thing that caught jungkook’s attention the most was the sweater. not the fact that it was so large that it swallowed the man’s entire frame but still made the entire fit scream effortless and attractive. not the fact that the color palette complimented his silver hair.

they had the same fucking sweater?

taehyung, who is privy to jungkook’s unique tastes, had carefully chosen the very sweater as a christmas present. he claims that he happened upon it in some random thrift store and thought it screamed jungkook and bought it even though christmas wasn't for another three months.

jungkook thinks otherwise. the sweater is just. so nice. taehyung probably bought it at a non thrift shop last minute, which would explain why jungkook ran into another person also wearing it. yeah. that would explain the coincidence. it’s definitely embarrassing, but people are bound to be caught wearing the same clothes, seeing as they’re mass produced for that reason - to be worn.

as he starts cleaning up, jungkook silently thanks himself for choosing the night shifts at level supermarket because 1. he likes staying up late 2. he gets to meet interesting and colorful characters like that one sweet ahjumma with cotton candy pink hair that comes in every day at 9:36 pm sharp to buy a bag of lollipops and nothing else, for example.

jungkook’s checking the inventory for the third time - it always helps to be extra thorough - but his mind begins to wander back to that silver-haired man.

a small - admittedly very small - part of him wants to never see that man again because he was a stranger, a very attractive stranger, and jungkook acted like such a freaking loser. god he’s blushing again. but the bigger- much bigger - part of him wants to see the silver-haired man again. like, he was fucking attractive. but also something about a frustrated looking man coming in a store at midnight that hardly anyone ever comes to just.

he’s like a novel jungkook is itching to read.

jungkook just wants to know.

jungkook wants to know. jungkook wants to know how this man likes his eggs cooked. does he have any tattoos? is he a morning person? okay, maybe not that because he’s up and about at midnight.

what is his opinion on soulmates? does he listen to dean? what does his smile look like? does he like smiling? is he a smiley person? is he doing okay?

because most of all, jungkook wants to tell him that things are going to be okay. something about this man seemed - lonely and jungkook has an urge to reach out and be like, me too, i understand, i hope you’re okay.

but. jungkook shakes his head to clear the thoughts. he’s doing it again. he’s getting ahead of himself and he’s doing that fantasizing thing he tends to do. at his core, jungkook is a very kind and empathetic person and the times he does feel good about himself he wants to meet people and reach out. back at his small hometown, the people were very friendly and accepting, and this made it easy for him. and with the town being so small, eventually jungkook knew everyone and everyone knew him and he was very comfortable with this.

however, this is seoul. and after making the difficult decision to leave the comfort of his town to pursue his dreams in the form of a dance degree, jungkook has learned that not everyone feels the same way in this city.

‘city people’   he thinks with distaste - but mostly - disappointment.

jungkook closes and locks the store’s front door, as well as his hopes for seeing the silver-haired man again. he’s no stranger to how this kind of thing works. nothing good happens when he gives into wishful thinking.

/

as soon as yoongi is back in the safety of his apartment he calls namjoon. “joon, what’s up?”

“okay, so. like. yeah. i don’t know, hyung!” yoongi goes to open a bottle of beer, his silence prompting namjoon to continue.

“i just woke up and now i have a new sun tattoo on my wrist! honestly, it looks pretty good paired with the one i already have of the crescent moon.”

“well, as long as you’re happy with it joon, i guess it’s cool.” yoongi takes a long gulp, “could’ve been worse. could’ve woken up with the word ‘penis’ tattooed in large letters instead.”

namjoon cackles heartily and yoongi smiles at the sound. “yeah, you’re right hyung.” he laughs again, “this is like some weird soulmate shit.

yoongi elegantly swallows some beer down the wrong airway. “yeah,” he coughs a few times to clear his throat, “come to think of it-,”

on second thought, maybe yoongi will keep cashier boy to himself. what happened earlier that night still felt - unreal. yoongi feels like he’ll break the enigmatic anonymity of the attractive cashier boy if he says anything.

“hyung?”

“no, nothing. nevermind,” yoongi changes the subject, “how’s that new track going?” and namjoon enthusiastically explains his progress.

/

the next day, yoongi finds himself slouched at his desk, pen tossed somewhere to the side. he’s looking down at what he can only call organized chaos atop his desk. this is usually how his song production process starts anyway. he scans some of the lyrics he just scribbled all over and he sees stuff like ‘ enigma and mystique ’ and ‘ eyes that hold stars ’ and ‘ deer in headlights... i’m struck by your beauty mystery loveliness- ’

uh-huh. yup.  okay. yoongi stands up and gathers all those loose leaf papers in a pile and goes to deposit them in the wastebin.

he pauses and throws them in a random drawer in his nightstand.

he needs to get out. he grabs his leather jacket draped across the back of his desk chair and power walks his way out of his apartment.

yoongi finds himself wandering the city again and wait. it’s that store again. what the fuck? did he just subconsciously make his way to back to the store and it’s attractive cashier-

shit. yoongi sees said cashier boy through the front windows, presumably stocking a shelf. he gets up and starts walking back to the counter, but as he’s doing that his body faces the front doors, which probably puts yoongi in his plain sight.

yoongi quickly backpedals, hoping he hasn’t been spotted.

he stands in place for a beat.

he refuses to acknowledge how hard his heart is hammering.

after much internal debate, yoongi decides that fuck it. he’s already here and he sees a huge jar of cheese puffs from where he’s standing and he might as well get that. because. he needs. inspiration.

he walks in, trying his best to put confidence in his steps and not looking at the cashier - who is now sitting at the counter with earphones and bobbing his head to a beat and is he humming?

yoongi walks down the chip aisle, deciding that he needs to have different flavors on hand when he gets tired of the cheese puffs.

over the top of the aisle, yoongi can see cashier boy stretching and fuck. his shoulders look good in that leather jacket too.

yoongi reaches the end of the aisle and is about to stroll into the next one, but almost trips on his shoelaces of his black converse. he kneels down and glances at the counter, seeing that the cashier is now standing. they make awkward eye contact and yoongi quickly goes back to tying his own shoelace, not before seeing a flash of black converses disappearing behind the counter.

when yoongi goes to pay for his items, cashier boy has taken off the leather jacket, leaving him in a simple white tee with a simple supreme logo. and now his incredibly toned biceps are out on display. wow. is it getting hot in here? yoongi sees the veins in cashier boy’s arms when they flex to hold the large container of cheese puffs. yoongi gulps.

it’s too hot - yoongi strips off his own leather jacket and slings it over an arm. eyes looking anywhere but the cashier, he taps his foot and waits for cashier boy to state the price and yoongi can pay and then he can leave.

except. cashier boy hasn’t said anything for a little while. yoongi chances a quick glance upwards. cashier boy is staring at - yoongi’s chest? fuck, did he wear his kumamon jammies out or something?

but like, if this boy has something against kumamon, yoongi has a serious bone to pick with him.

yoongi glances down at his own shirt. then back up at cashier boy. then back at his own shirt.

weird. yoongi’s wearing a supreme shirt. cashier boy’s wearing one too. cashier boy squints, like he’s suspicious of yoongi or something.

yoongi clears his throat, “uh - can i pay for my things?”

this seems to shake the cashier out of whatever stupor he’s in, “ah - sorry.”

yoongi pays for his things and goes to grab the bag the cashier is holding out for him to take. yoongi overshoots a little; okay, maybe he’s a little flustered and accidently knocks his hand against the cashier’s.

there’s a little clink as yoongi’s ring bumps against cashier boy’s.

okay. fuck. they’re wearing matching rings too?

they both face each other with similar looks of shock and confusion. before either of them have a chance to say anything, yoongi books it out of there real quick.

/

something weird is going on and jungkook doesn’t know what to do.

he’s just minding his own business, listening to offonoff’s new album while doing his math homework at the register to keep an eye on the store in case anyone does come in. it’s midnight but still.

then, jungkook sees movement in the corner of his eyes and realizes that someone has come in without him noticing.

it’s the silver-haired man again. and shit, he looks really good. he’s standing in front of the snack shelf, with his hands in the back pockets of his jeans and he’s wearing this large leather jacket.

jungkook does not salivate.

but wait. jungkook looks down at himself. how is he also wearing a leather jacket?

it must be another fluke. jungkook hurriedly stands up and takes his jacket off, pacing around for a bit.

he looks over at the silver-haired man again and sees him tying his right shoelace.

jungkook looks down at his shoes.

his left shoelace is untied.

a mixture of mild horror and panic starts thrumming through his body, but he refuses to tie his shoelaces and resumes his nervous pacing.

he turns around and jumps slightly. the silver haired man is right in front of him, fidgeting with his hair.

jungkook goes to ring up his purchases, which are all comprised of various family size chip bags. he goes to ring up the last item, a jumbo container of cheese puffs, and pauses. the silver-haired man has taken off his leather jacket and. why. is he wearing a supreme shirt. like jungkook.

jungkook stares dumbfoundedly at that stupid supreme logo and the man’s prominent collarbones before he clears his throat and asks for jungkook to ring up the total.

right. jungkook hurriedly bags everything and thrusts them towards the man, hoping he’ll leave quickly.

the man accidentally knocks his hand against jungkook’s and this time jungkook does not hide his shock.

you've got to be fucking kidding. they have matching rings. it's like they're a couple or something.

what. is happening.

/

the next night after his shift at the local coffee shop, yoongi actively seeks out level convenience store, as well as its resident attractive cashier. he’s wearing this ostentatious, bright yellow, furry thing. it’s so. loud. and lowkey ugly. hence the reason why he’s out at night.

however, yoongi swears his sweater is bright enough that he’s probably glowing in the dark.

but, yoongi also needs to prove a point. whatever cosmic fuckery is going on, whatever deity is fucking with him, yoongi just wants to prove to himself that this is all bullshit. running into a cute stranger repeatedly is enough, and yoongi doesn’t need any other unexplainable shit happening.

/

jungkook is tapping his foot, a habit of his that surfaces only when he’s nervous or anxious. jungkook is definitely focusing on math homework and definitely not looking out for a certain silver-haired stranger.

he rubs his nose with the sleeve of his sweater and almost sneezes. geez. jungkook had asked taehyung to lend him his craziest article of clothing at the moment, seeing as taehyung’s fashion style is overall - crazy. so, taehyung tossed him the first thing he laid eyes on in his closet, and it was this gucci sweater. gucci my ass, jungkook thinks. this sweater is just a very good excuse to cosplay as big bird.

jungkook just wants to figure out what is going on. like, he meets some cute stranger and-

holy shit. he sees said stranger standing outside on the sidewalk.

okay, somebody up there must hate jungkook because - he looks down at himself just to make sure - both of them are once again, matching.

like, how does the stranger still look striking in such an ugly sweater?

jungkook can only stare as the stranger swiftly turns around and bolts down the street.

/

yoongi slams the door of his apartment closed, breathing heavily. he looks through the peephole to make sure no one had followed him. he’s not taking any chances.

that’s it. something is up and yoongi’s solution is to - hole himself up in his apartment.

wait, can he do that? oh yeah, it’s friday. and he doesn’t have any shifts until monday.  fantastic. he can devote himself wholeheartedly to his unfinished tracks over the weekend.

yoongi wakes up saturday afternoon, but allows himself the luxury of lounging around in bed for a few more hours. this effectively brings the start of his day well into saturday evening. he fishes around for some spare instant ramen packets, and begins working as soon as he gives himself some salty sustenance.

his weekend goes by like this: immersing himself with writing lyrics and producing elementary beats for a few straight hours and then taking short naps in between. he eats if he remembers. or if namjoon reminds him.

all in all, he does a good job of not thinking about the weird stuff that’s been going on, and especially about the soft-looking cashier boy.

except.

yoongi stumbles out of his bedroom, finally succumbing to his stomach’s urges, as well as namjoon’s rapid texts.

he fumbles around for a cup of ramen - his last one, he’ll have to refill - and goes to find a scissor to cut off the plastic wrap.

his fingers slip and he ends up cutting himself.

he sighs as he looks down at his bleeding finger. he dabs at it lightly to try to clear away the blood, but it just keeps oozing out. he grabs a tissue and presses on the fresh wound, waiting for it to clot, but the blood just keeps coming.

what the heck? he didn’t cut himself that hard.

ah, shit. he doesn’t have any bandaids.

he checks his phone. 2:55 am. is there a store open at this hour-

there might be one.

before yoongi thinks about it too hard, he wraps a clean tissue around his finger and books it out of his apartment. he’s not about to hold a tissue around his finger for the rest of the night to keep it from getting infected.

as he fast-walks to level convenience store, yoongi thinks about cashier boy again for the first time in awhile (a couple days.) maybe whatever matchy-matchy curse or spell or shit is over, since yoongi hadn’t seen or even thought about the boy. wow. an achievement.

cashier boy probably isn’t even there, seeing as it’s so late.

whatever, yoongi just needs to grab some bandaids and then he’s out.

he heads into the store, notices that the register is unattended, and goes to grab a box of bandaids. while he’s at it, he stops by the ramen aisle to refill his stock.

as he makes his way to the register, he sees someone now sitting behind the counter. yoongi stops in his tracks. it’s cashier boy. he looks as stunning as ever. and he’s fiddling with one of his fingers, which happens to be bandaged. he looks up and only then does yoongi continue walking towards him.

none of them say anything as cashier boy rings up his items, but he does raise his eyebrows slightly when he notices the blood-soaked tissue around yoongi’s finger.

after he pays, yoongi doesn’t leave right away. instead, he rips open the box of bandaids and slaps one around his finger.

“how did you hurt yourself?”

holy shit, even cashier boy’s voice is attractive - what the fuck - with a soft, lilting tone to it.

“uh, i cut myself trying to get some ramen.” god he sounds stupid.

“wait, really?” cashier boy’s doe eyes widen - yoongi sees his eyelashes, - “me too! i was doing inventory and had to refill some ramen for the shelves and yeah.” he gesticulates with his injured finger.

yoongi is silent for a moment. they even have matching wounds.

“this shit is real, isn't it?”

cashier boy tilts his head. “oh. you mean the weird clothes thing-”

the lights in the store flicker and then suddenly fade out completely.

yoongi panics for a second as his eyes adjust to the darkness, but that initial shock instantly goes away as soon as he sees cashier boy’s big eyes reflecting the street lights outside.

he finishes cashier boy’s sentence. “...yeah. the weird clothes-matching thing.”

“well, my best explanation is that the universe continually derives pleasure from fucking with me.” cashier boy pauses, “n-not that it's always a negative thing! i mean, this time wasn't so bad!” he rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, “i-you - sorry! i didn't mean to make that sound like an insult to you.”

yoongi chuckles, “hey, it's fine. the universe likes fucking with me too.”

cashier boy shyly ducks his head.

yoongi looks around the store, now shrouded in complete darkness. “should we maybe find the fuse box or something..?”

cashier boy sits down on his stool. “nah, it’s fine. this happens quite often, actually. i don’t even know why you bother coming here when there are plenty of 7-eleven’s,” he sighs, “this store is pretty shitty and rundown.”

“i don’t know. i kinda like the warm, colorful vibe.” yoongi thinks, also, it’s because you’re here.  

“well, the longest the power’s been out was like, thirty minutes.” cashier boy unlocks his phone and begins scrolling through, “um - you’re free to leave..? i have everything under control.”

yoongi makes no move to leave and hops up to sit atop the counter. in doing so, he’s inevitably brought himself closer to cashier boy. when yoongi turns his head, he sees cashier boy up close, ensconced in moonlight, the contours of his face highlighted by shadows.

yoongi stares at cashier boy’s dark eyes, and at his eyelashes as they fan across his cheeks when he blinks slowly.

yoongi’s eyes are immediately drawn to his lips when he worries them between his teeth. if they begin leaning into each other’s orbit, none of them are the wiser.

suddenly, yoongi feels a sharp sting on his forearm. at the same time, cashier boy jerks away, hissing in pain.

something is etching itself into yoongi’s skin and he squeezes his arm to try to take away some of the pain.

his arm is still searing when the lights flicker back on.

“god, what the fuck was that-” yoongi looks down at his right arm, all red and puffy, and sees a tattoo.

it's a lock.

yoongi looks up in shock.

cashier boy has a similar look on his face. and on his left arm, is a tattoo of a key.

there's still specks of blood on cashier boy's fresh tattoo and yoongi grabs a nearby napkin and slowly dabs on it.

cashier boy flinches slightly, but yoongi places a hand on his upper arm to comfort him, to ground him. yoongi traces the boy’s tattoo lightly with his thumb and looks back at his own. a perfect match.

“i’m yoongi. min yoongi.”

cashier boy smiles softly. “jungkook.”

/

me [12:01 pm}

joon

quick question

so like

did anything weird happen

before ur tattoo appeared

dance monster [12:15 pm]

i mean

not that i can think of ??

hyung just cuz u and jungkook had some storybook soulmate romance doesn't mean smt like that happened to me

me [12:32 pm]

well what happened that day

dance monster [12:44 pm]

nothing really

i just had a study session with jin

me [12:49 pm]

‘study’

what exactly were u two studying

dance monster [12:50 pm]

hyung

need i remind u that jin is my metaphysics and epistemology tutor and wait wat were we studying ?

oh yea !!!

~metaphysics and epistemology~

me [1:00 pm]

you think he's cute, don't you

dance monster [1:05 pm]

im not answering that

me [1:06 pm]

im sensing a blush

dance monster [1:10 pm]

actually

now that i think about it

i came into that session late that day

as i was leaving my apartment i somehow

hit my knee on the doorframe

and fell

and dropped all my stuff

left a nasty bruise

also got a paper cut across my right palm as i was tryna pick up all the books in a hurry

me [1:16 pm]

you would

i fuckin bet smt like that happened to jin

hello

joon?

/

yoongi is rudely awakened by big bang’s ‘bang bang bang’ - why did he let his boyfriend pick his ringtone?

said boyfriend stirs in his sleep, burying his face deeper into yoongi’s shoulder and wrapping his arms tighter around yoongi’s waist. “mmph - hyung. make it stop. let’s nap more.”

yoongi turns his head and places a kiss atop jungkook’s forehead, “sorry baby. just let me take this real quick.”

he blindly grabs around for his cell phone and sees namjoon’s caller id lighting up.

“what.”

“hyung! what the fuck. what is happening.”

yoongi groans. “yes, what is happening. please enlighten me.”

“me and jin have matching bruises! even cuts and everything! i met up with him today and remember that cut i got on my palm? he had one too, and then we realized we have the same injuries!”

yoongi tries to process this information as fast as he can with a sleep-addled brain. “so, he’s a masochist?”

“no! god, no. he’s the one with the sun tattoo! remember how my sun tattoo appeared? well, he’s the one that had it, and he said that a moon tattoo appeared on him! like mine! hyung, we’re matching!”

“well, congratulations.” yoongi sounds grumpy, but he means it. “though i feel bad for jin. you’re a fucking klutz. don’t kill him before you ask him out officially.” he yawns. “i’m going back to sleep.”

with that, yoongi hangs up and turns back to wrap himself around jungkook.

“hyung, what was that about?” jungkook murmurs with his eyes still closed.

“nothing. just some weird soulmate shit.” he buries his nose in jungkook’s fragrant hair. “let’s go back to sleep.” ~

[mxnyxxngx]

shuffle song tag 🎧

@romeongs skdjskdjkdsj ahhhh ILY AND TYSM FOR TAGGING ME :’) i hope we get to know each other as mutuals more !!! uwu (ps i love ur music taste and ur url)

Rules: shuffle your music library and list the first 13 songs and tag 10 people

1. satoori rap - bts: ok so I ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE THIS SONG AND I FEEL LIKE ITS UNDERRATED AFTER ALL THE CYPHERS AND STUFF BUT ANYWAYS yeah ugh its such a throwback too like i have super nostalgic memories associated with that era of bangtan :’)

2. just right - got7: ooooh this is one of my favorite got7 songs (after a and if you do) and like !! the mv for this was so cute and it feels good being told by the lyrics that im just right the way i am uwuwuwuwu

3. heartbreaker - nct 127: OK THIS IS DEADASS ONE OF MY FAVORITE NCT 127 SONGS THO its hella catchy and I THINK THE PRODUCTION IS A M A Z I N G and it makes my heart flutter sdkjskksdj plus i love haechan and doyoung and taeils voices in this song a h (PLUS TAEYONG/MORK SINGING IM DECEASED)

4. pour up - dean ft zico: theres not a lot to say about this song except that i love it and i love my husband dean (and zico) and hes so hot i miss him

5. hero - monsta x: I LOVE MONSTA X OK this is like the song that really did me in (even tho JOOHEON STILL KINDA SCARES ME TO THIS DAY) but yeah ugh its so catchy and the mv is very :^))) nice

6. crazy - teen top: rip this is one of my least favorite teen top songs even tho i still like it BUT UGH I FUCKING MISS TEEN TOP W MY WHOLE HEART SKDSDKSDK SEOUL NIGHT WAS AMAZING BUT I MISS LJOE

7. shadow - beast: aw omg another throwback :’) back to the good ol days ahh its still amazing to see highlight/beast membrs continue to be active and popular to this day im really proud of them

8. love me right - exo: OK this concept fucked me up im a h o e for sports jock/fuccboi concepts and this song is funky and catchy as hell one of their best title tracks imo WOOOT

9. full moon - sunmi: A BOP OK IDK WHY ITS NOT AS POPULAR AS GASHINA OR HEROINE OR EVEN 24 HOURS BUT MY LADY WAS BEAUTIFUL AND SEXY AS FUCK IN THIS SONG AND THE DANCE ????? MY POOR HEART

10. opera (japanese version) - super junior: HAHAHAHA OOPS IDK WHY I LISTEN TO THE JAPANESE VERSION MORE THAN THE KOREAN ONE BUT THE MV FOR THIS ?? A WHOLEASS CONCEPT IM IN L O V E :’))))

11. day by day - wanna one: UM OK SEEING THIS SONG LIVE REALLY FUCKED ME UP HEAVY AND IM STILL NOT OVER THAT THANKS AND I REALLY FUCKING MISS WANNA ONE OK CATCH ME LISTENING TO THE NAYANA PIANO VERSION AND SOBBING MY EYES OUT

12. wine - suran (produced by yoongi): MY GIRL SURAN HAS ONE OF THE BEST VOICES OUT THERE FUCKING COME FOR ME IF U DISAGREE AND SHE DOESNT DESERVE ANY FUCKING HATE @ TOXIC ARMYS STFU also yoongi is a production g e n i u s but its not like we didnt know that already

13. sober - big bang: omg !!! i love this song and i always listen to it when i feel like i need to get hyped or bring my mood up a h :’) my favorite of their title songs i think

ahh wow this was so fun !!! skdjskdj ok i dont even know if i have that many mutuals to tag but here i go !!! @sasha092398 @byeulbitch @ashweeeeeh ;))) @smittenbyschmidt @iamashamedofmyfanfics @eme-loves-kpop 

[k-hiphopshit]

I’m Not Sorry (Dean x Reader)

Requestedby anon. I don’t know if it’s angst but I tried, based on the song “i’m not sorry” by Dean. Enjoy!

You thought that being with Hyuk would be great, he wined and dined you, he treated you like the most precious woman. You were in the industry too so you did not trust him, you were an underground rapper and you were around rappers and other artists all the time, so you knew the game. You know the saying "things happen when you are not on guard"? exactly that.

He started ignoring you, missing calls and dates became normal, you started feeling used and it hurt, he was only there when he needed someone to warm his bed. The worst part was when you decided to confront him, asking questions he didn't want to answer.

"Hyuk i'm not a hooker, I deserve more than this, you told me I deserve everything! where did that go?"

"Look, I don't have time for this"

He went to get his trousers and pulled a pack of money, he started approaching you with the pack on his hand, you could feel your stomach turning.

"Take this, go buy some nice stuff and have a good night OK princess?"

He instructed you, placing the money on your hand. You looked at him with rage, you might have been sad a second ago but now you were fuming. You acted automatically and slapped him as hard as you could, you threw the money at him and got up to get your stuff. He just stood there looking at you with a devious smile.

"Don't EVER call me again, you are an asshole"

"Whatever you say princess, close the door on your way out"

"Go to hell"

-

You started issolating yourself, you had true feelings for Hyuk and seeing him treating you like this was a huge pain to your heart but also to your ego. Because of your unstable mind you decided to take a break from everything, from your friends, your studio, social media, the gym,everything. You stayed at home, you knew it would hurt your career but you had to do this, you ad to deal with your heartbreak.

Slowly but surrely you rose back up. You went to the gym, you called a few friends and you heared a few beats for inspiration. Of course your "no show" attitude made your name take a tumble, you just suddenly went ghost mode and people thought you were done for, you had to get started all over again, but you were ready to face the music and show to everyone that you still lived for music. 

"I don't want to face him again"

"This is the best opportunity to put your name back out there, Show me the money is a huge show and can give you back your credibility. If you do get through the team selection pick another team, you have worked with Jay and he would for sure want you on his team"

Your producer argued back. You and him had managed to develop a good friendship, that is the reason he was on your case for applying to this stupid show, you had to admit he was right about how big the show was,but could you really stand seeing his face again. You knew good and damn well that he would feel a great satisfaction for being able to judge you, cause that's just how he was, an asshole full of pride and lust for power over anyone.

"I don't know"

"This is your career (y/n) you are going to throw it away for him? this will give him more pleasure than letting him be a judge. Even if you don't go, you will have to face him, you can't hide anymore"

That hit you straight in your heart. He was right, you have been avoiding him for such a long time, you can't keep doing this, also it will help you one hundred percent move on from this, to finally see him and be comfortable with it, don't just run out the room or refuse to go to an outing just in the thought he could be there.

"Fine, I will apply"

-

On the first round of auditions you were lucky. Tiger JK was the one that showed up in front of you to hear what you had, so you bowed and waited for him to give you the go 

(These are lyrics from a song I like, nicki minaj ft. eminem Roman's Revenge)

I am not Jasmine, I am Aladdin So far ahead, these bums is lagging See me in that new thing, bums is gagging I'm starting to feel like a dungeon dragon Raah, raah, like a dungeon dragon I'm starting to feel like a dungeon dragon Look at my show footage, how these girls be spazzin' So fuck I look like getting back to a has-been Yeah, I said it, has-been, hang it up, flat screen Plasma, hey Nicki, hey Nicki, asthma I got the pumps, it ain't got medicine I got bars, sentencing I'm a bad bitch, I'm a cunt And I'll kick that ho, punt Forced trauma, blunt You play the back, bitch, I'm in the front You need a job, this ain't cutting it Nicki Minaj is who you ain't fucking with You lil' Fraggle Rock, I beat you with a pad-a-lock I am a movie, camera block You outta work, I know it's tough But enough is enough

You were happy with your delivery, your voice loud and clear with a heavy amount of confidence. Tiger JK smiled and gave you the necklace.

"Good Job, keep working hard"

You smiled and put the necklace on, as you saw the cameras approach you to see your reaction.

"2017 will be the best year, watch out"

-

Now was the hard part, but you decided to make it even harder so you pulled a few lyrics you had written while heartbroken just to fully let it all out and actually show some emotion other than confidence and the common project of "i'm the best, I get money" that everyone was projecting. So you patiently waited until your name was called and it did, you took a deep breath and walked to the door before the stage with the put of fire.

"Ohh this will be interesting"

Jay said. He was one of the few people you had confessed everything that happened, he sympathised with you and helped you find yourself again, you owed a lot to him.

The door opened and you walked in trying to avoid eye contact with him, inside you were shaking but on the outsdie you just smiled and stood on the spot with the big X.

"Who was the one that passed you?"

"Tiger Jk hyung"

You answered and looked at him. So did the others, waiting to hear the reason behind it.

"She had very strong lyrics, she was very strong and neat with the lyrics so the necklace was very well deserved."

"Thank you"

"Okay so let's go"

(These lyrics are from a song “doin’ good by kittib and Verbal jint)

It’s the first for me too After I met you, I got some sick time off But things just got dull and soft My growth did not become better

Even when you changed things however you wanted I was so busy adjusting to that I didn’t want to acknowledge this But my heart is bigger, even if I became the weaker person

I remember back then, you said, “not you” but I told you that I got this someday I hated myself for being next to you I hated myself but I still believed in myself

I’ve opened my once blind eyes I’ll put away the question mark that I had on myself No one can knock me down I’m turning the light off between us

I’m not a firefighter but now I’m extinguishing So I won’t find myself in anyone else Focus, look in the mirror Believe in what you see, I’ll win it all I’ll give time to myself instead of guys I need nothing

You took a deep breath and pretty much got out of the zone that you were on, you didn't really pay attention to the judges while you were rapping, it was like you were alone in the booth or your house. Although you got an all pass.

"That was a strong amount of emotion"

"I went on a hiatus because of something that happened on my personal life, so I wanted to come back here because I want to show that i'm still worth it but to also give a glimpse of were my mindset was at the time"

You explained looking at Dok2, who was the one that asked. They nodded and you waited for further comments.

"It was beautiful, we don't really see others coming here and admitting feelings like that"

Gaeko commented and you nodded, it was exactly what you wanted to achieve and you were happy someone got the memo.

"That's what I wanted, we are all humans"

"We'll see you on the next round"

Zico chipped in. You bowed and walked away with a happy smile all over your face. You did it, not only you passed, you saw and performed right in front of him, with confidence might I add.

-

What you did not expect was an unexpected phone call during the night hours. You picked up thinking nothing off it but your breath hitched to your throat once you heard that familiar voice.

"That was quite a show you put on today (y/n)"

Dean. You had stopped calling him by his real name a while ago, since the fame had eaten him up and there was no real person behind Dean. You swallowed the lump in your throat and faced the music

"What do you want?"

"I know you want to hear a sorry (y/n), but i'm not sorry. Actually I think I should hear a thank you from you, since the song that gave you a pass was all about me"

"Is this why you called?"

"Come on (y/n). What do you want to hear? that I missed you? No I don't, why you were hiding I made money. Why did you even performed that? to make me regret what I said? no I don't"

You could not understand why he called you,he was just bragging, honestly you did not feel hurt or pissed anymore, you were just over it.

"Here's what's up Dean. Don't ever call me again, you are an asshole that does not deserve any of my time, let me succeed on my own and please if I do make it in a team I would appreciate it if you NEVER come and talk to me. I hope you rot with your money in hell"

After that you hunged up. There it was, the pain was slowly creeping on to you, why did it had to be like this? why doeshe want to hurt you so badly? he called just to put you down, to rub his success on your face, he acted like you had hurt him and not the other way around. That's when the question came

"Should I give the show up?"

What if he is like this all the time? What if he never stops calling you, can you live with him waiting to rip you in pieces? What will happen next?

[gyeommine]

MY FAVE 17 SONGS OF 2017

these are not in any order, but imma try and explain my dumb/not appreciated opinion for each one. i don’t listen to a lot outside of my mains, but i won’t list 10 BTS songs dw <3

Intro: Serendipity | BTS

it’s serene. the softness of jimin’s voice just soothes me. the build and the depth to this song is incredible, and it’s a great intro to their album. idk it’s just nice to hear jimin’s voice in this nature, when he’s not belting out those big high notes. it’s shows a new but nice quality to his voice.

Don’t Wanna Cry | SEVENTEEN

this is a song for the bloody a g e s. even my non kpop friend adores this song. there is no surprise that this song is on the list. i think it just fills my entire being when i watch the choreo or listen to the song. it’s a masterpiece - hands down. if u feel attacked by the mingyu x wonwoo attack, i feel u.

YESTERDAY | Block B

a pure underrated bop by a pure underrated group. some people this ‘cutesy’ fun cb didn’t fit their image, but i disagree. it shows their silly and funny side, bc they are bunch of dorks. and i always flip the fuck out in P.O’s verse lmao.

Teenager | GOT7

i am going to be honest w y’all, nothing that GOT7 had come out w truly gets me like the flight log: departure era. it is one of my favourite kpop albums of all time. so their latest comeback was SUCH a good thing. this song is just fun, flowy and the “i will do anything if u tell me good boy” is one of the most life ruining things that has ever come out of kim yugyeom’s mouth. one of my fave comebacks last year !!!

Easy Love | SF9

i stil retain that SF9 are the best rookie group out there at the moment (if they’re still classed as one? idk anymore). i loved all of the title songs they did in 2017 and i struggled between this one and ROAR tbh. there are no visual, vocal or rapping holes in this group. they’re phenomenal. just listen to the chorus of this song and tell me otherwise? also zuho’s rap at the bridge makes mE FREAK.

Our Tears | Hyolyn

this song is plain beautiful. it does give me hwarang flashbacks, but this song is just b e a u t i f u l. hyolyn has one of the most incredible voices i have ever heard. i have tried covering this many times, but i could never sing like her. i have no more words, this song is just amazing.

��제(無題) Untitled, 2014 | G-Dragon

i had a hard time picking between this ‘bullshit’ but this one moves me every time i goddamn hear it. this is a new side i am not used to w GD’s solo stuff. it’s gorgeous. i don’t know why but every time the chorus hits, i feel like my heart is being pulled out of my chest. it’s beautiful, but so melancholy. what an incredible artist he is.

MY I | SEVENTEEN

okay the mv and the dance are both incredible, but this song is genuinely outstanding it’s also damn sexy. i actually prefer the Chinese ver, and not bc i am repping the chinaline for the sake of it, it’s actually more pleasing on the ears. SVT does such a good job of showcasing all their members’ abilities, esp w all the unit stuff. but i love the build of this song and the background, it strips it all down and that is what makes it sO sexy.

Beautiful | MONSTA X

oh LOOK. another masterpiece. this is one of my favourite mx albums, alongside the clan pt 2 for me. i literally cannot fault this song if i tried, along with most of their songs. i loved dramarama and shine forever, but this is my fave. it’s that perfect mix of hype and sultry, that damn chorus will kill me kihyun. also the most iconic bit of choreo with the arm thingy after the first chorus. incredible. stan talent. i am beyond words that they got their first win too, what lovely ppl.

ANTI | Zico (feat. G.Soul)

idontunderstand okay so i had a hard time picking between this and artist tbf. but omg the whole atmosphere of this song gets me. the breakdown before g.soul’s final chorus gets me hype. zico is just a genius when it comes to produces and i adore everything that he releases. she’s a baby and artist were basically on this list as well. so zico is my fave solo artist, hands fucking down.

Crazy, Sexy, Cool | ASTRO

tbh, i kind of fell out of love w ASTRO and idk why?? i just hadn’t been as mad obsessed w them. then they released this bop, and i am riding the hype train again. ASTRO has some of the best choreo ever which says a lot in an industry where pretty much everybody is great at dancing. i also feel very much offended by jinjin’s rap??? no thanks. opting out. they have just matured so much. 

전야 前夜 The Eve | EXO

okay, this is one of my top EXO songs for sure. it’s not my fave EXO album, but this song was worth me buying it tbh. it’s sexy as hell. it’s like a lighter artificial love and it fucks me up? also the vocals are smooth anD WHEN THE GODDAMN CHORUS HITS and suddenly 9 men have spread their legs all at once. we’re all screwed. they’ve taken over. also, always a fan of do kyungsoo’s adlbs.

I will go to you like the first snow | AILEE

okay i know she is a legend, but i have never really sat down and listened to her stuff (bad ik). but when i listened to the Goblin soundtrack, this damn song slapped me so hard in the face. her voice is outstanding. i also remember the amount of times Goblin ripped out my dumb heart and stepped all over it. anyway, i think this song is powerful and so is ailee tbh. the ending where she hits those notes, my wig flies. 

봄날 Spring Day | BTS

choosing only 2 BTS songs is a bloody feat. i bought this repackage SO fast wow, and this is definitely one of my fave BTS comebacks. ngl, i prefer it over DNA (although it will take a lot of effort for them to release a terrible song). this song and video are gorgeous. this was just such a fantastic era and time for BTS and this song makes my whole heart flutter like a 14y/o girl. 

Beautiful | Crush

okay yeah soz it’s another song from Goblin’s OST but i am viewing the songs individually, not because the show alone. anyway, i had no idea this was Crush. since i only knew him from ‘bermuda triangle’ (which is such a fucking bop) so i assumed he couldn’t  possiblyhave this sweet, angelic voice. spoiler - i was wrong. this song fills me with such emotion.

DARLING | Taeyang

honestly this man could punch me in the face and i would apologise. this song has mad “eyes,nose,lips” vibes but it’s so good. i loved this entire album, but ‘darling’ caught my heart (how gay is that). his voice is incredible but u can be assured i belt this song at full volume whenever it hits even at 10:30pm when i am writing this. i will always rep the BIGBANG bois, and i am glad this was the last album he decided to make before he went to the military.

What U do? | EXO

i had a hard time choosing between this and boomerang. but, this remains one of the standouts of the album. the chorus and entire song are so goddamn catchy, and similar to taeyang’s entry, i have a hard time not singing this aloud. i normally play this song after i leave the house at 7:30 in the morning to try and motivate me. i  just want to jump around like a doofus, and i love exo songs that do that.

sorry this was SO long. i just have loads to say and too many songs to write about. sorry for my crushing absence, i am back at school again and i am exhausted. it’s nearing my play too so i am learning lines too!! hope you enjoyed this ! <3

[felicityb-reviews]

Review Roundup - Week 1 January 2018

Hello babies!! Welcome to your debut Review Roundup for Week 1 of January 2018!!! I'm really excited to launch this series, because while I do love doing reviews, sometimes the only thing I can say about a song is "I like it, it was good". I also wanted a place I could spotlight releases from less popular acts (or even less conspicuous releases, sometimes) who don't exactly have 2309342 million fandom pages. This is a great way to combine that, I guess.

Before we begin, some ~rules~

For a song to eligible, it has to have an official video. Even if it's basically some shit an intern made in Final Cut Pro in five seconds, before uploading it. I just need to know that it's an ~official~ release.

No OSTs!! 90% of them are dry ass ballads, and I do not have the time, sis!! No OSTs!! /Edna Mode voice

And on that note, I might choose to skip a certain release, because I have nothing to say about it. Or nothing nice that isn't constructive criticism.

Yes, each video has a Rating™. Do not get hung up on said Rating, cause it's basically meaningless; it's just an arbitrary number based on how much I liked the particle song, mixed with how well I thought the song was written.

Just like with my Feature Spotlights, the blurbs here are just my opinion, sis. Please do not get hung up on what some gay bitch on the Internet has to say about your fave. I'm hella arrogant, but my words are not of God.

So now that we got that out of the way (Even though I'm 90% sure some bitch is gonna try my ass), our list begins with...

Grown Up (Soyou)

Grown Up is pretty standard fare for a Starship ballad. The company has always submerged themselves in RnB and Gospel sensibilities, and it shows here. Miss Soyou takes us to church with Grown Up. A very nice song which I appreciate, but will probably not listen to much, unless I'm in a Ballad Bitch™ mood.

Rating - 3.5/5

TRCNG - Wolf Baby

"Ooh bitch... You mighta just did something there"

That was my first reaction to Wolf Baby, fam. I was ready and willing to write the song off, because the teaser did not show it off in the best light (it sounded like a demo of Hyosung's Into You, according to a friend) and the visual was more of the boys showing off their dance skill. Which is never a bad thing... Except when it's literally the same shit we've seen 20 million times from similar boy bands. But Wolf Baby delivers in full. Unlike the God awful Spectrum which takes after B.A.P in the worst of ways, Wolf Baby sounds and feels more like a Secret song (which sounds a lot better than you think it would). Wolf Baby shows that these boys have personality that can translate to the music, and Lord knows we need more of that in K-pop boy bands. I'm so tired of being charmed by these boys in variety, but utterly bored by their music.

Rating - 4/5

Think about (Seo Ji An featuring KLANG)

Lissen... Whoever wrote this song needs to give me a refund. That intro had me thinking this was gonna a bombastic radio ballad. Like, they were about to hit me with that Ryan Tedder throwback shit. But instead, all I got was soft falsetto and a limp piano line.

Talk about a boner killer, sis.

But once I got over myself (and the song started to pick up), I realized that it was actually pretty nice. Nothing I'd put into heavy rotation, but this would be good shuffle bait.

(Sidenote - if anyone can find me anything on the female vocalist, KLANG, I will give you a hug and a cookie, because I really liked her voice)

Rating - 3/5

XOXO (Soyeon of LABOUM x Park Jae Jung)

We're getting a jump start on the Springtime love duets, I see. I can't say I'm entirely mad, tho. XOXO, like Seo Ji An's Think about, falls within a category of songs I like to call shuffle bait. They're not terrible songs, but they're also not ones I feel obligated to put on heavy rotation. They're good for those days when you don't know what you wanna listen to or need some soft background sounds, so you put your music on shuffle. Not a category one should aspire to be in, but not one to be mad at for falling into, either.

I'm very happy that Global H made this a duet, cause Soyeon's overly bright tone could have tired out the ears very easily if she had to sing this by herself. And not only that, but Park Jae Jung provides a nice foil to Soyeon's voice with his smooth tone. All in all, a very nice song.

Rating - 3.5/5

Honey Tea (OOHYO)

Miss OOHYO is givin us a little Bassa Nova in her Honey Tea, you guise!!

Honey Tea is another shuffle bait song that almost makes it in the Heavy Rotation camp with it's interesting choice of instrumental interludes; but alas, she doesn't quite make the cut. There's something about the production here that doesn't quite mesh right; the song elements don't meld into one another like they should, especially with such ~agreeable~ (for lack of a better word) elements as these. This song is really nice for what it is (the melancholic atmosphere nice for those days when you just wanna brood like an angsty teenager), but I needed just a little bit more.

Rating - 2.5/5

Like Paradise (Kriesha Chu)

Something tells me that Future Bass is going to be everywhere in Kpop this year like Tropical House was last year, and I'm not quite sure how I feel about that. On one hand, you have Svt's Don't Wanna Cry and LONG:D x Kim Doyeon's All Night that are masterfully made songs. But then you have BTS's Best of Me and Kriesha Chu's Like Paradise, both of which are so fucking beige it makes me wanna slam my face into a wall. And it's really sad because, unlike Best of Me, Like Paradise starts out with a great verse. But then the prechorus goes right into generic territory with a chorus that's so anybody, it's almost frightening.

Kriesha Chu exploded onto the scene with a familiar formula in Trouble, but she did enough to make it her bitch, so idk what happened here. A friend mentioned that she feels as though she's heard this melody fifteen times, and I wouldn't be surprised if she has. This song isn't bad, but it don't got no soul. Which is a shame, because Miss Kriesha Chu has plenty to go around.

Rating - 2/5

Blah (Planetarium Case #1)

Now this is a song that took me by surprise. I was not expecting that Tropical style beat to kick in when the verse started, but I mean... Y'all know how I am with anything and everything Tropical inspired. And then they had the nerve to combine that heaux with RnB style instrumation?!?!!

Bitch...

I wanna be mad at how much I like this song. I really do. I wanna care about how the vocalist's voice is a touch too bright and whiny for that kind of vocal processing (it's faint, but it's there). I wanna feel some type of way about how that kind of vocal processing isn't really suited to this type of song. I would like to have some kind of critique here, but everything just slots together in a way that I can ignore the little things I don't care for.

Sis, idk how these underground labels know me well enough to make such targeted attacks against me like this, but I'm not mad. In fact, I'm very okay with that if I get to walk away with songs like Blah. Can we get more of this, instead of Future Bass or whatever other kooky trends are gonna rule K-pop this year?!?!!

Rating - 4/5

Foresight Dream (Younha)

Hello, Miss Younha!! It's nice to see you giving us something other than classical ballads like some kind of Baek JiYoung knockoff.

...was that mean?!?!!? Okay yeah, that was mean. Oh whatever, it isn't like other people weren't thinking it.

Copious amounts of shade aside, I'm been very here for what Younha has been doing, musically, since Get It. She's swapped out the ballads for a more RnB/Pop sound that's very in line with what the K-RnB World has been doing lately, and I couldn't be happier. Foresight Dream is a dreamy piano driven song that's a bit too downtempo in groove to qualify as an Acoustic Coffee Shop RnB Midtempo, but still has enough drive to feel like it's actually going somewhere. And Younha's voice sounds amazing. She's got a voice very similar to Alice from HV's, but Younha has more depth to her tone. All in all, a very magical experience.

One critique I have (and it's not even of the music) is that I'd have liked if Younha had released Foresight Dream before the GroovyRoom produced Parade. With the way Parade followed the ph-1 assisted Hello, I had assumed that she was done releasing songs. But with Foresight Dream coming after those two, it kind feels like it dampens her momentum. Idk, I'm just being a picky bitch.

Rating - 4/5

wewantourmoneyback (Giriboy)

*sigh*

This nigga talmbout how he want his money back, but I want my fucking time back from listening to this hot mess.

Okay, let me roll back the shade for a second. This song really isn't that bad. I've heard F A R worse from the likes Jay Park, Zico, and Dok2. But dude, this is a touch too fucking generic for a winter release. You couldn't have saved this for summer?!?!? When niggas is actually trynna shake they ass to generic trap beats?!?!

To be honestly, I'm tired of hearing these kinds of songs in K-HipHop. Especially from dudes who have tones like Giriboy. Their voices are whiny as fuck all, and these kinds of beats usually have a lot of higher tones in the mix (for those who are too bougie to listen to trap, producers typically use high, tinny synths as the main instrument in trap beats), so it's just a headache in the making. It's already hard enough to make a trap song without it sounding too repetitive, but these fools have truly tired me out with this genre. I can't even think of something to say about this song, cause it's just so generic.

Rating - 1/5

Paint Me (Mamamoo)

I'm sorry... MamaWHOMST?!?!?!!

Jokes aside, I'm not quite sure how I feel about this song. Mamamoo is a group that I once loved, but all that went sour when they decided to do blackface in concert (and then post a BTS video of getting into costume for said stage a week after posting an apology). And if I'm being honest here, their only good songs are You're The Best and Piano Man. I stanned for their other tracks for the culture; I liked what they did with the songs live. I didn't really listen to them, but tis the life of a K-Pop stan.

In retrospect, it's quite interesting how Mamawhomst Mamamoo haven't promoted a big power ballad like Paint Me before. The instrumentation is basic as all fuck, but it allows emphasis to be put on their vocals. Which are half the reason Mamawhomst Mamamoo survived Nugudom, in the first place. But as great as their voices are in this song, it just doesn't go anywhere. It throws you from one extreme to the other, and then ends. It's hella polarizing, and not something I really wanna put myself through with repeated listens.

Rating - 2.5/5

A Day I Want To Love (HEYDAY featuring Lim Eun Young)

A Day I Want To Love is a very typical classical ballad, and while that usually has me running for the hills, I decided to give it a chance. And I mean, this isn't a song that I'd put into Heavy Rotation, but it'd fit in very nicely with all the songs I download to use as shuffle bait. I'd also quite like to hear this sung live. Idk, I just feel like it'd come off better that way.

Rating - 3/5

OGZ (Jo Woochan x Park Hyunjin x Achillo)

I don't understand this song.

That's not to say that it's bad. The beat reminds me of wewantourmoneyback, but GroovyRoom decided to make a more interesting remix of it. And the boys all hand in amazing verses. But idk, yo. This song just feels weird as all fuck.

Rating - 4/5

Missing You (VOISPER)

How fitting that this is the song that closes out the main list week. Missing You is another lowtempo shuffle bait track (the mood for this week, apparently), but this time around, we get some horns in the mix. Which I greatly appreciate, because without them, this song would have been extremely boring. VOISPER have nice voices, but their technique is kind of sloppy. And I don't usually sweat shit like that, but it's really noticeable here.

Rating - 3/5

The Fabulous Five

So... You've made it to the end of the post (thank you, btw), and are now wondering what in the actual fuck a Fabulous Five are. Well, it's simply a fancy title (because your bitch is hella dramatic) for my favorite songs of the week. In fact, if you payed any mind to the (badly made) gifs at the top of the post, you'd notice they're from the following videos. Anyway, there's no real metric for what goes here, just songs that I stan a lot.

5. Lower (f(Amber+Luna))

MY WIG!!

MY QUEENS!!

M Y W I G!!

Lower is God tier, sis. I've read a few people's reviews of the song, and the one thread of commonality between them all is that Lower is generic and not worthy of the f(x) brand. And while I'm not gonna sit here and act like Lower isn't something I'd expect to hear at a European gay club (or any gay club for that matter), I really like what Amber and Luna did with this song.

I also think that Lower should be considered a performance piece above all. I view EXO's Monster this way - I don't care for the song by itself, but I'm hype as fuck when there's an accompanying visual. Amber and Luna could have made this beat their bitch (Luna certainly has the vocal chops for it, and Amber could have done ha thing with a lil rappy rap), but the main focus of the song is the breakdown. And they dance for their fucking lives to said breakdown.

I can't tell you if I'd have liked this song so much from another duo in K-Pop or if I'd have liked it if it didn't come with a video, but the reality is that like it.

Me Likey Likey a lot!!

I'm really hoping that SM sees how well of a unit these two make, and decides to debut them, officially. Cause God only knows we aren't getting any new material from f(x) anytime soon. Victoria is too busy livin ha best life in China, and Krystal is too busy looking fed up for no reason with Jessica, whilst people throw money at BLANC & ECLARE.

Rating - 3/5

4. Hot Potato (N.FLYING)

Before I start in on my review of this song, I just wanna ask what the fuck is up with idol bands being filled with beautiful ass humans?!?! Like?!?!?! Anytime I watch anything with Day6, I can't help but wanna cry at how hot they are. And watching N.FLYING's Music Core comeback stages, I got the same feeling. I could barely pay attention to the songs. Am I really just that thirsty?!?!?

Nobody fucking answer that, I know I'm thirsty heaux. I don't need you shady bitches dragging me for it.

Existential crisis aside, Hot Potato is a banger. I'm really hoping 2018 is the year idol bands start thriving, because I need more songs like these in my life. The verses are pure octane fun, while the choruses are power pop crack. I dare one of you to tell me you wouldn't sing along to that chorus if you knew Korean. I fuckin D A R E you!! And whoever's idea it was to add Yoo Hweseung from Produce 101, I wanna kiss you silly. His chemistry with Lee Seunghyub is ridiculous!! And in addition to that, an added vocalist allows them added flexibility with with N.Flying's rap/sing vocal style. I'm just so happy with this song, especially with how little love I had for The Real. It's great, sis.

Rating - 5/5

3. Her (Drug Restaurant)

Raise your hand if you had no idea that Jung Joon Young's band changed their name to Drug Resturaunt!?!?!?

...

Oh that was just me, not paying attention to anything?!?! Okay...

The first time I heard Her, I was immediately mesmerized by that opening chord progression. Some part of my musically trained brain knows how overused that progression is, but the rest of me is too busy blissing out to it to care (to be fair, most chord progressions in popular music are overused, because there's only so many that actually sound good to our ears). Her is no one trick pony, tho; she may come back to the oddly dissonant and melancholic texture of the intro now and again, but she always makes sure to give you something new with it.

The rest of the song is pretty great, too. Jung Joon Young has a very smooth texture to his baritone, very similar to BTS's Kim Taehyung (and if y'all know anything about my gay ass, y'all know I'm a H E A U X for baritones), and it's a great contrast to the grit of the instrumental.

Her is a very nice intro (err... reintrduction) to a great band. I keep telling myself I'll get back into rock like I was in middle school (the only good thing about being a weeb is J-rock and VISUAL KEI, I will fight you if you say otherwise), and it looks like God decided to help a girl out.

Rating - 4.5/5

2. Twenty Something (Alice featuring Yooyoung of HELLOVENUS)

Hello?!?!? Fantagio?!?!?! Starship Entertainment called; they want their Acoustic Coffee Shop RnB Midtempo back.

Yes, I realize I'm not that funny, but it's not gonna stop me from cracking jokes

So... If you don't know what an Acoustic Coffee Shop RnB Midtempo is, it's basically the RnB version of an acoustic midtempo ballad (hence the acoustic coffee shop bit). They're usually not acoustic at all, but they still have the same feeling as an acoustic ballad, if that makes sense.

And can I make a bold statement here?!?!!? Fantagio just declared a turf war against Starship with this song. Yes babies, it's that fucking good. Starship is usually my go to for Acoustic Coffee Shop RnB Midtempos, but it looks like Fantagio wants to throw their hat in the ring for consideration.

Alice has the right amount of grit to her voice to really hook you in, but a decent amount of brightness to help uplift the track. And Yooyoung's rap is just... Oh my God, it's so good!! I wanted it to be longer, sis. A++ content!!! She provides a nice texture change that makes Alice's voice pop when she takes over the track again. And the instrumentation just makes my brain happy tingle. God, I'm just so in love with this song!!

My only complaint is about that flat ass, limp ass, needs to be put out of it's misery ass high shriek Alice does over the final chorus. Guys, I am so tired of my ears being accosted by these singers trying to belt. Most of K-Pop's vocalists are sopranos with bright ass tones and absolutely no power behind their voices. This obsession with high belted notes at the end of songs is just so weird, and if y'all are gonna continue to do it, I need y'all to integrate that shit into the song better. Don't just have a vocalist do their best "OH MY GOD, THEY'RE TRYING TO KILL ME" shriek. It's so irritating!!

And apparently, this is the first of a monthly song single campaign Fantagio is doing for 2018?!?!!? Someone at that company wants me to die, sis. First, they inflict Ong Seungwoo and Park Jinwoo on my ass, and now this.

Rating - 4.5/5

1. Bboom Boom (MOMOLAND)

First of all, can we give S. Tiger a round of applause for throwing it back to EXID's Nyam Nyam Jeop Jeop?!?!?!? That is a top five favorite b side of mines, so the second I heard the guitar in the teaser, I fucking Knew™ my edges were about to get snatched right off my face.

Secondly, Queen JooE is outchea livin ha best life, and I'm just so here for it. People love to talk shit about girl groups cause they only do cutesy and sexy concepts (nevermind the fact that boy bands do the same shit, but I guess y'all not trynna hear that), but anytime girl groups give you something different, y'all not trynna stan. So, I'm so fucking here for JooE serving you basics Unapologetic Joy™ in the New Year.

Hallelujah, Thank You Jesus!!

For those of you who can't tell (although it's position in the Fab Five should've tipped you off), I fucking love Bboom Bboom. I was ready for Bboom Bboom the second the teasers started rolling in, and my excitement hit an all time peak with the Great! highlight medley showing that the entire mini was Banger Central™. My only complaint about the song is that the transition from the trap beat to the regular beat in the second verse was so throwed together and clunky. Did y'all run out of time to really integrate that right, cause?!?!?!?! I love that section, but that it could have been handled way better.

Still my favorite song of the week.

Rating - 4.5/5

And that's that, folks!! Tune in next week at 6pm EST to see my round up of this week's new releases. And don't forget about Friday's Feature Splotlight at 6pm EST!! There's been a little (Okay, it's a pretty big ) change to the schedule. Wanna know what it is?!?!?! Be sure to check it out!!!

[eureka-its-zico]

Bad Moon Rising - Chapter One

co-written by @tabi-ears

Scenario: They were raised for only one purpose: to fulfill one man’s desire for ultimate power. What happens when the four of them lose the person who’s kept them chained since infancy? Are they meant to avenge him or start over? Is it possible to be more than what they’ve become? If only the answers were that easy…

A/N: This and 2 other chapters were previously worked on by the both of us. It’s an original idea we came up with one night and decided just to run with it, and is 3rd person based. Finally, it was decided that we would share this with you. Now I do warn you, this story is much darker than anything I’ve previously shared. Please keep an open-mind and have the patience to learn about the characters throughout the progression of the scenario. As always, we thank you for reading! Much love, Jenn & Missy

Genre: Mafia AU

Pairing: Seunghyun x OC, Zico x OC

Disclaimer: Any gifs used are not mine and belong to their rightful owners and are only meant to support the story visually for fun. The following chapters have graphic depictions of violence so please be aware.

It was another assignment.

Something to do in the name of the good, the bad, and maintaining that balance in their madness. No one knew how the four of them came to be. The mystery of whether they were plucked  from the streets or snatched from their mothers breasts was something whispered amongst the unsavory characters that feared them. They carried no records of a name: faceless beings that appeared like the boogeyman out the corner of your eye. The only thing certain was that all four of them held the promise of an unmarked grave. These unnamed figures arriving outside the compound an hour ago.

S’s long body relaxed on the hood of the impala releasing a cloud of toxic smoke into the night air; polluting it with villainous thoughts they considered normal. M turned to look at him. Her gaze roaming over his motionless figure and eyes transfixed on the sky. Between the days that consisted of training and plotting out exit strategies he talked loosely if there was such thing as a heaven. S held onto his theories in his soul that allowed him to daydream about entering its like a viking to the gates of Valhalla. If only to destroy it.

The sound of the trunk slamming home alerted M to L’s presence as she rounded the side of the car, duffel bag in hand, and pulled out a pair of leather gloves to slip over her fingers.

“He come back yet?”

M shook her head before she snapped an instructing finger at S to hand over the cigarette. Her cigarette. His head jerked in her direction with eyes blazing a deadly fury at his interrupted thoughts, but M was unmoved.

“We haven’t seen him come back yet. Well, well speak of the devil- “

It was as if the mention of his presence was enough to summon him. The way Ouija boards promise chances of last minute talks with loved ones, only to send something darker in their place.  

Z made his way out of the cloaking darkness of the desert. The moon highlighting strong features that barely softened with the child-like roundness of his face. His eyes reminiscent of a tigers that felt ominous to the point his sharp jaw line and pouty lips did nothing to help make people feel at ease. He was a stark contrast to the statuesque shape of S on the hood of the car. S’s features striking except for a cleaner cut jawline that reminded many of a Roman statue. God-like with his only charm being the grace he gave those to not have to see death in his eyes before he smothered them with a pillow, and silenced them with a trigger.

 Z’s long legs carried him up the slope until he stood a few centimeters away. His chest barely rising at running five miles back leaving the compound far behind. His duffel now empty and discarded at the front tires of the Impala. All except for the explosive charger held in his hand.

“We ready to do this?”

He seemed bored and, more than likely, was. He’d done his part and the need to finish something he believed to be a trivial task blazed in his eyes. S slid off the hood in a graceful movement of limbs until booted feet puffed a cloud of dust from the ground beneath. His hand reached to pull his Browning Hi-Power from its holster to remove the safety and cock a bullet into place.  

“I’ve been ready. I was just stuck waiting on you.”

S moved to the side of the car neglecting the cold stare the younger man sent him. He leaned in through the window and produced a black suit jacket from inside.

“Oh, I’m sorry would you like to be the one to sneak in and place the explosives? I don’t think you’re smart enough- “

“Boys!” L yelled her irritation readable in her voice and features. She handed M her last knife giving her enough time to finish concealing her own weapons. M’s movements swift as she slid the blade home into the wrist holster she’d secured moments ago. “If you’re done arguing we have work to do.”

“Let’s do it then,” S replied coldly.

He adjusted the collar of his shirt under his jacket and moved forward, expecting the other three to follow at his back. A Viking king leading his men to claim Valhalla.

____________

“How the fuck could you ingrates let this fucking happen!”

All four bodies were kneeling on the floor with hands sprawled out in front of them with their foreheads rested against the cool cement floor.  S in particular remained quiet; his shoulders rigid, as he listened intently to the scolding they deserved. A small river of blood flowing down a jagged line between the four of them from the bullet sized hole that tore through L’s shoulder.

Z’s gaze peaked from the sides of his peripherals to watch her sway against gravity for the fifth time. Her eyelids fluttered open and closed to a rhythmic beat with the obvious war she ragged to stay conscious. The lack of a hand that was previously supporting the wound now leaking at a steady pace. M knew what he was thinking. She always did when it came to how he noticed L, because it was the exact same way she noticed S.  

Her eyes combed up the length of Appa’s body to make sure he wasn’t looking before she reached out to lightly tap Z’s shoulder. His eyes darting over to M just as she shook her head in hopes in their silence he received her message: don’t. Her lips mouthing, “She’ll be okay,” and prayed it was enough to calm her oppa’s nerves.  

“You had one fucking job. ONE! You are supposed to go in undetected! That was the whole fucking point of this goddamn assignment and instead you- “A brutal kick landed on Z’s shoulder sending him flailing back. S’s shoulders noticeably became tenser while he struggled to stay motionless against the urge to protect his dongsaeng. “You fucking idiot! You are supposed to be the smartest, but apparently you are the fucking retard of the group.”

“Appa, I’m sorry- “

“I don’t want to fucking hear it! Because of you L is going to be out of commission and you fucking knew I needed her to make rounds this week. Now what the fuck am I supposed to do?”

The question was rhetorical. No one moved to answer. The only thing the three of them knew was that L was dangerously close to passing out. At the snap of Appa’s fingers two men in lab coats came forward to lift L off the floor. It took everything in Z to not reach out and take L back from them. The worry that housed itself in his gut making him careless.  In the end, Z wasn’t able to fight the twitch his hand gave. Unknowingly, it slid across the floor after the doctor’s and even that small of a movement was enough for Appa to see.  

“What do you think you are doing?”

The factory they called home was large. The width large enough that it would take a dozen men, in a chain with arms outstretched, to reach the other side. Old iron pipes and gunmetal catwalks lined a second floor and only aided in making the cement encased building feel colder. Somehow, within so much space, Appa was able to make those seven words resonate around them. The rage no longer needing to be seen on his face as it suffocated them in fear.

“I just want to make sure she is okay.”

Z knew he sounded weak. The very thought violently rising bile to the back of his throat. L herself would’ve damaged him for his tone alone, but he refused to back down. The choice was already made and, regardless how it ended, he refused to further be a coward and repent.  

Both men knew his words showed weakness, and his hidden meaning exposed. M wanted to move to put herself in front of Appa, to defend Z from the coming blow, but realistically she knew if she did they would all pay the price. The loud crack of the whip resounded off  lifeless walls as Z made no move to block himself or touch the blood leaking freely from his cheek. His face turning violent as it swelled, and heated, until the crimson of his cheeks and liquid matched.  

“You fucking idiot! It is your fuck up that did this to her in the first place. I didn’t make you to be weak, boy. Do I have to send you to isolation? Will that jog your memory of your purpose?”

At the threat of the isolation room everything grew quiet. The tension straining through each of them was the only sound they could hear besides that of their own rushing blood, and L’s dragging feet.  

“Appa.”

Appa’s withered face rested solely on his eldest. His earlier words left frozen in this throat; watching S as he moved to sit up on his knees.  

“If I may, I will take responsibility for him. He is my dongsaeng. Any punishment you wish I shall deliver.”

Appa stood motionless; his tongue rolling around in his mouth as he mulled over S’s offer. Out of all of his children he knew S, his eldest and greatest achievement, would deliver. No matter the cost. His protégé mirroring the same coldness as his own.

Appa made his decision in a second; a sharp nod in agreement while he placed the whip back on the silver tray beside him. His arms crossing behind his back as he took in the remaining three. Eyes watching intently as Z resumed his previous position of bowing at his feet.  

“See to it he gets thirty lashes before the dawn, S. You know what will happen if it is not done.”

“Ye.”

“You are all dismissed.”

The three of them waited for him to exit first before they made a move to get up. The first thing M did was go to Z. Her hand snatching the handkerchief out of S’s jacket pocket to start cleaning at his wound. She’d barely been able to start when Z’s hand gently wrapped around her wrist to stop her. His eyes darkened with guilt as he gave her a childish smile before letting her hand drop to her side.

“I deserve this.”

“It was a mistake.”

“I was in charge of shutting off the alarms. I missed one and L got shot. I accept my punishment: it’s what I deserve.”

“S saying something!”  

M glanced back over her shoulder at him. Her eyes frantically searched his somber expression while he continued to move like nothing was happening. His hand reaching in the inside pocket to produce his lighter. The flame flicked to life moments later sparking the end of his cigarette to glow a perfect cherry red.  

“Go ahead and get some rest,” he commanded. “I’ll be by your room around a quarter to dawn.”

“Ye.”

“S- “M tried to argue but S simply turned to head towards their dorms. A huff of agitated air followed at his back from the woman he’d ignored.

“They’re both like that,” Z mused. “Always leaving before you can get a word in.”

M looked back at her oppa with a wayward smile creasing her lips. She hooked her arm with his and began to walk after S with her partner in tow.  

“Difficult bastards,” she muttered earning her a chuckle from the man beside her.  

_________

It wasn’t until she’d dropped off Z at his dorm, locked in lovesick conversations and regret, that M found her way back to her own. Not in the least bit surprised to find S leaning against the doorframe of his dorm a few doors down. His eyes took in her small frame until his gaze landed on hers. The both of them chained in a silent hell of dancing around what they knew, but couldn’t say.  

“Feelings are dangerous things, M. We have no need for them here.”

“So we’re just supposed to let them wither and die?”

She’d never gotten a response to her question. Just an endlessly growing  list of more that she knew would never be answered. Forever kept silent behind guarded eyes and an even more guarded soul.  

They were magnetic. Dynamic. Passionate. Swallowing each other and the world around them whole. A force to reckon with, hidden behind scorpion tails and bull horns. Two predators, fighting for control within each other. Naturally drawn to one another like magnets on a table.  

Her kindness shocked him because how does one possess that? How did the demons that kept him up at night not get to her? Those demons hushing; becoming dormant once she touched him.  

He believed she was good, even though he dismissed her kindness when the bull was released and her once pure demeanor was filled with rage that could cause hurricanes and topple mountains. Normalcy would swim through his veins because he realized that they were the same. His heart would beat steadily in knowing he wasn’t alone. Their eyes helplessly watching each other’s movements. Pupils dilating, eyelids flickering. Never straying too far.  

They were both so hard. And yet, she was softer. And he admired that. Even when she was covered in bruises and blood leaked from her knuckles she never managed to hate the world. But that purity in which he loved could just so easily slip away once that switch flipped. Taking the lives of others is a guilty task to those who weren’t like him. It took a toll on pure hearts. So he guarded her. He guarded her heart and mind so she wouldn’t end up in the dark like him. One that doesn’t allow you to feel. He wanted to feel what she felt but feared it even more. He loved her. In the most psychotic, possessive way. But she did too. And maybe that was her flaw. That despite his darkness she needed him. 

Natural born Alpha’s who clawed at society’s expectations and norms. Pissing on their enemies and welcoming those who were close to their heart. He had demons, and so did she. They ate away at their brains like maggots on a corpse. Only finding relief in each other, for which they’d kill. 

_________

She couldn’t remember her family anymore, just that she supposed she had one. There were too many countless nights she’d been lulled to sleep by the soft sound of a woman’s voice reading her bedtime stories. It’d been a memory that ate away at her when she’d first arrived there. Now it haunted her every so often when she tried to find solace in cold sheets and a dirty pillow. Until, finally, the memories of a life before this hell was nothing but a six-year-old’s imagination.  

It was a deadly thing to try and get used too. The first time she’d met the others, there’d been two other children that’d been dropped at the feet of Appa. Three of them that slowly dwindled down to just one with the others never earning the privilege to receive a name. M was sure she actually had a real name before she’d been brought there, but for the life of her she couldn’t remember. Her first interaction with L a vivid one. M had made the mistake of thinking another little, but older, girl would be her friend. Someone to lean on and give her comfort. She’d clutched to L as she asked  if she could recall her name, only to be silenced by cold eyes, a busted lip, and instructions to never ask again.  

M could recall the terror she felt the second time Appa made his grand appearance. His words harsh and spitting like hot coals as he informed her and the other children the main rule in his house: You fight or you die. Dread so pure corroded in her veins until her nerves felt fried. The fear seizing hold of her bones and spotting her vision in black stars. Her child’s mind unable to understand before Appa called for S to enter the room. Even at a young age S was impressive. His eyes dark and endless, resembling oblivion, as he glanced over the three of them.  

He’d been Appa’s first child. His golden son who, at twelve years old, was merciless and never questioned an order. He’d been instructed to assist in their training and to show no mercy and to weed out the weak. L only being asked to help him when it was required. Soon, three children dwindled down to be only her. When she thought too long about it, M could remember the sickening sound of the boy, who’d been the same age, cracking in two. The way the body fell like a heavy lump to the dirty stone floor, and the lifeless expression on S’s face as he looked at the small child he’d killed.  

Kill or be killed.  

This was her reality now and there was no room for weakness. M didn’t want to die; she didn’t want to be weak. In the beginning all she could remember was how much she hated him. How her small body shook when he entered a room and cause her chopsticks to fall from between her fingers. How swollen black eyes struggled to scan for his presence in hallways and kitchen. The only reason she felt a semblance of safety was because of  Z.

He’d had a tall  frame even then, but lithe. He’d taken care of her when she’d been too exhausted to get back up after a brutal day of training. Her small body rolled into a fetal position until he picked her up and carried her to bed. When he feed her when her arms were too bruised to move. Later bringing warm water to help ease her muscles and to soak blooded hands.  

M knew her resolve was the only thing that kept her alive besides the kindness of a boy who showed it in secret when he wouldn’t be in danger of getting caught. For the longest, M felt nothing but fear in her heart when she looked over at her oppa and unnie. The both of them always discussing things in private; conversations M felt grown-ups were meant to have. She watched fights between the pair with mystified eyes that someone could ever be close to taking S down. No matter how close L got, however, she never succeeded.  

“They’re not that bad, you know.”

Z offered up one bitter night in a weak attempt to ease her broken soul. It’d been a vicious day of training. Her lack of coordination costing her a beating with a bamboo stick by L at Appa’s request. The older man demanding that she hit hard and harder to the point M thought L would kill her. The punishment brought on by her inability to open up a switchblade. She wasn’t able to keep her hands from shaking causing the blade to tumble to the floor. The flashback enough to make her hands curl in the edges of her pillow in hopes it was enough to smother out the possibility of keeping that shame forever.

“How can you say that? They’re so…mean.”

Mean didn’t feel like an adequate word to be used to describe the two. M wanted to find worse, but her seven-year-old brain couldn’t find one. She only knew that she was starting to hate them.  

Z carefully placed a warm washcloth on her exposed back. It forced a small cry of pain from M’s lips that she silenced against the pillow.  The action left Z to stare down at her with pity, and his hands to fidget in his lap as he struggled to find the right words to comfort her. He knew this routine. He’d been through it himself, and he would’ve lied if he didn’t omit that when the three kids came, he’d been glad. Glad someone else got to suffer with him when it came to his hyung.  

“It’s hard to explain. They’re only like that because of Appa. He has a lot of expectations.”

“What does he want? I just want to go home.”

“This is your home now and, if you want to live, you better start realizing that.”

The arrival of a third voice left them both startled. M’s head whipped up from her pillow while Z already   stood to drop down at the edge of the bed and bow repeatedly in apology. The shadow of L’s figure in the doorway held the same imposing threat as S’s. She was only ten but, with her arms crossed and making her entrance, M could’ve sworn she was colossal.  

“Why are you in here?”

“I…noona…I just came t-t-to- “

“You know Appa will have you whipped if he catches you stuttering,” she interrupted. “You promised him you were working on it.”

“Yes, noona,” Z replied back. Another bowing fit hitting him reminding M of a toy on a spring.

“No one wants you here! Go away!”

M didn’t regret the fire in her small voice. She didn’t want to see L or S’s stupid faces ever again but, unfortunately for her, L didn’t seem to care. If anything it only brought her attention back to her.  

“I came in here to tell you that I decided to help you.”

The information wasn’t what she’d expected and M felt the surprise widen her eyes. Her mouth grown slack as she asked meekly, “Why?”

“I like you. You have courage. But you have to get better, if you don’t, Appa will get rid of you.”

M didn’t need to ask what she meant by, “Get rid of.” She’d seen how Appa handed over guns to S and directed him to shoot kneeling men asking for second chances. How S pulled the trigger like he was just stepping on a bug or killing a rodent that entered a home.  

The following weeks were spent with L teaching her the easiest way to do things. Taking the time with M to run around obstacle courses she’d created just to work on her agility and speed. Showing her the most effective moves that blocked blows and to think quickly on your feet by searching for makeshift weapons. More often than not M would end up catching a blow that sent her spiraling down to the floor. L always there with an extended hand to pick her up and push her forward.  

When it came time for her next sparring session with S she’d noticeably gotten better: landing a surprising hit that actually sparked shock in his  eyes and a piercing shout of joy from Appa. M allowed her happiness at landing her first blow to overtake her, and it made her blind. Not realizing that spark of surprise she’d caused turned deadly. She didn’t get a chance to correct her error. One minute, she was victorious, and the next M was knocked on her back, her lungs screaming for air, and S’s fist raised back strike down at her face.  

Before he could land the hit, L was there spinning him around, and earning the punch meant for her. The hit landing solid against her nose causing L to stagger back and fall to her knees. A steady flow of blood seeping between her fingers as she held her hand protectively over her face.

“That’s enough!”

At Appa’s words everyone grew still. Their bodies waiting like toy soldiers for him to direct them into action. M couldn’t remember much except the proud smack on her back she’d received from him. She knew somewhere in there he instructed someone to take L to the infirmary to have her nose looked at. That Z was watching her be led away by men in black suits.

After that day M felt like she’d earned S’s respect in some way, but it didn’t stop the brutality of his training sessions. Time continued to age them, and yet, it didn’t change the fact S remained untouchable. It wasn’t until her sixteenth birthday when L surprised her with a cupcake with a tiny candle that she felt brave enough to ask questions.  

“How long has S been here?”

M didn’t think she would receive an answer. The look of mirth on L’s face slowly ebbed away until she turned to look out at the atrium in the center of their industrial home. The only  bit of green they saw unless instructed to go out to run an “errand” for Appa. It seemed like she would never answer. Until she did.

“He was the first one here,” L spoke softly. “They say he’s Appa’s real son, because he’s been here since he was a baby.”

“And you?”

“What about me?”

M’s innocent question seemed to spark a brutal storm. L’s face hardening to the point M couldn’t stand to keep her gaze locked with a dead woman’s eyes. So she shrugged in an attempt to play innocent and looked out over the atrium. She needed that moment to get rid of the look her sister still had that sent shivers down her spine. In her mind, M believed that what they were was a family. Past things like meeting an acquaintance or friend. Simple words too light when you were bonded over a lifetime of blood and broken bones.

“I don’t mean to upset you, unnie. It’s just no one ever talks about it.”

“Your curiosity is going to cost you one day.” L let out a heavy sigh before taking a long pull from her cigarette. “You and Z, both.”

At the mention of the younger oppa M’s  lips quirked up remembering the last time her and Z shared their usual late night talks in her room. How the boy never realized he’d been rambling on and on about L. Both of them stuck at home while their elders were off doing something Appa wouldn’t allow them to join in just yet.

“You’ve got to earn your place.”  

M could vividly recollect the sound of L’s struggle to carry in a half unconscious S. The smell of wet grass and copper spilling into the conjoining rooms and above. L’s soft grunts the bread crumbs M and Z needed to find the two of them perched in the center of the main building. S’s chest exposed with L pressing large gauze against his stomach that blossomed red. There was no doubt in her mind that they’d been talking in hushed tones. At first, M wasn’t able to tell what about until she ignored Z’s urgent hand gestures to return to the safety of their dark corner and cautiously move further down the stairs.

“…you were careless…”

“What do you want from me?”

“How about to pay goddamn attention next time?”

“You’re forgetting who’s in charge here.”

Even from a distance S’s low timber rattled her bones and M felt the urge to bow to his authority. To apologize for L’s careless words, but to M’s amazement, L didn’t budge.. Instead, she met his cold eyes with her own. Her hands completely stopping from bandaging up the wound to reach out and take hold of his face.

“Hyung, we’ve been through much, you and I. You’re the one that taught me feelings are useless; they’re dangerous. Do you mean to tell me you suddenly no longer believe that?”

M never got to hear his reply because Z’s sudden sneeze alerted the two of them they weren’t alone. Their eyes actively scanning the outer rooms of darkness that the two youngest used to cloak themselves until they were back to the safety of their dorms. Ever since that night, M felt her curiosity grow to the point she couldn’t contain it any longer.  

“I was two, I think.” L spoke through a cloud of smoke. Her eyes squinting as she stubbed out her cigarette.  

M nodded her head trying to hide the small smile of victory she felt at getting her unnie to answer. It was always like pulling teeth to get S or L to do anything, really.  

“Z told me he came here when he was six. Like me.”

“That’s true. Maybe that’s why you’re both a pain in the ass.”

“We’re close. Like you and S hyung.” M’s curiosity ignited again and she was unable to stop herself as she eyed L. “Have you and S ever…”

L looked confused until realization flew her doe eyes wide and disgust scrunched up her nose.

“Oh god no. What makes you ask that?”

“I don’t know. I mean you’ve both been here the longest so- “

“Let me impart some wisdom with you that S has shared with me, M: Feelings have no place in what we do. They’re a danger to people like us.”

“But you love me.”

It was amazing how much L could remind her of S sometimes. How L’s once light exterior could become so callous and reserved in the literal blink of an eye. M watched as it happened then, as L’s hand moved to scoop up her cigarettes and she stood to leave her.

“I don’t love you. Your family, M and we take care of our own.”

_________

“Try again. Try harder.”

As the months and years passed, M was allowed to go out on more assignments, but with more assignments came more training. With that training came time spent with S and she wondered how she could go from absolutely loathing someone to wanting to understand them. The boy he’d been had grown into an even deadlier man. The deadliest, and cruelest thing, M felt since her teenage years was how handsome the cosmos had made him.  

She always assumed it’s what was part of his charm; what made it so easy for both he and L to gain access to parties meant for only the beautiful and the rich. What made her believe that maybe the two of them were closer than everyone thought. Beautiful people flock together, didn’t they?  

Even into adulthood M felt a little awkward. The only confidence she found was in her ability to wield blades of any make and style. How easily she could make the steel become an extension of her body and slice through the air with an accuracy that few could ever hope to possess. The greatest gift she’d received was on her 21st birthday. A katana greeting her when she’d walked into her room. All the bullshit forgotten as the duffel slipped free from her hands and her feet sprinting to her gift. Her palms cradled it with care as her fingers danced over the woven horsetail braids that laced around the handle. The sound of the blade being removed from the sheath slicing through the quiet of the room until the steel glinted in the rough fluorescent light.  

M thought it must have been from Appa; who else could afford such a gift? But the sound of feet shuffling at her door, the person that stood there, instantly made her think otherwise. S leaned against the frame with his arms tucked securely against his chest. He watched her with interest, his gaze skimming over the blade in her hands.  

“You like it?”

“I love it.”

He grunted out, “Good,” before turning on his heel to retreat from her dorm. M’s head now filled with more questions than answers. It wasn’t until their next sparring session that M started to realize just what was going on.  

He’d knocked her off her footing with a hard elbow to the face giving barely any time to right herself before he advanced.  

“Try again. Try harder.”

M swung out blindly, a distraction that he easily took, and used her distraction to her advantage. Her knee coming up to land a solid hit in his kidney. The opposite leg moving up to hit the other side while she anchored herself. M  followed up the blows with an elbow to the back of his neck. It caused him to hunch over just enough for her to continue landing blows onto his back. Even M knew it was a weak shot; her arms unable to reach anything vital at his sides. It didn’t take S long to recover. It never did.

Before she could prepare herself for his attack he’d had his arms around her waist, lifted her off the floor, and slammed her down hard on the padded mat of the gym floor. Her legs struggled to find good placement to aid her in gaining the upper hand in their game of dominance. The two of them moving in a death roll with neither of them able to stay on top for long. Finally, as it always happened, S bested her and M found him on top with her arms pinned above her head. She wasn’t sure if it was just the heat of the moment or the added rush of adrenaline that caused her to be so brave. Whether it was bravery or foolishness M was never quite sure, but she held no regrets when she leaned forward and kissed him. It didn’t feel foolish when he kissed her back. In that moment all M could feel was his hand moving to cup her face and a tongue tracing across her lips and exploring what she was willing to give.

Just as fast as it started it had ended. He was off of her in a flash and bolting for the door leaving her behind to watch his retreat. The only person she could tell was Z, because she was more than sure S was probably off telling L. The two of them going over their mantra of, “Love has no place here; feelings get you killed,” until it turned them blue in the face.

It’d been months since that incident, but S’s lips left a stain on her own that she couldn’t shake. His already guarded exterior turned impenetrable around her. The only time she’d been able to read him when he watched over her on their shared assignments: he defended her when she never asked.

_________

The smoke of his cigarette lingered around him creating a mask that hid him partially from view. He hadn’t moved from his position against the doorframe and he wouldn’t enter his dorm until she was safely inside. The both of them staring through a void that shared in their unsaid words and frustrations. The conversation they’d shared months ago replaying like a broken record.

“It isn’t foolish to love someone.”

“I can’t love you, M. Beauty has no place around a man who only knows how to destroy it.”

At the time M wanted nothing more than to argue with him. To somehow believe anything she could say would be enough to convince him that he was capable of being more. The cold reality, however, was that their life was breed for chaos. How could they ever believe they were capable of more than that.

[theblobmaster]

17 songs of 2017

tagged by lovely @marinacourage​, thank you <3 

so this slightly killed me, i started with 29 songs and 3 full albums. i got it down to 14 songs and 3 full albums. i don’t care, the albums need to be on there in full because i’ve listened to them from start to finish so often. 

i decided to only do kpop/kpop related and limit myself to songs released in 2017 otherwise roy kims whole discography would be on and i would have to cut down from over a 100 songs probably. all titles will be links if you’re curious :D 

the first six are in order afterwards not.  

1. Verse 2 - JJ Project.

this album okay. this fucking album. i fell in love with jjp in 2012 and during the five years it took them to comeback i’ve probably listened to the bounce single over a thousand times. this album is a 180 in music style but goddammit it hit me. this mellow RnB sound just relaxes me so much. the thing is that this is full of emotions that is conveyed through their voices and their voices compliment each other so much. and i think it has a lot to do with the fact that they were so involved with the making of the album. their solo songs fit them perfectly and i get feels every time i listen to it. i have listened to this album minimum once a day since it’s been released and i’m still not over it. will probably never be over it. 

2. Stone Heart - Taemin

okay first of all the whole move album is amazing but stone heart captured me. his album came out while i was in korea or just before i left. for around four days during that trip i basically only had this song on repeat. the beat, the atmosphere, his fucking voice okay it’s just. so. good. it’s sultry in the best way. and now every time i hear it i can smell korea which is nice as well. i’m so proud of him and this album really cermented that, seeing him grow so much just warms my heart. but can he please just start wearing clothes that’s not see through or just put on a fucking shirt pls. 

3. 7 for 7 - GOT7

another full album i know but i would make it into one song if i could alright? so good. first of all this feels like an /album/, this songs are consistent and have a red thread in their atmosphere. i don’t feel like i’m being jerked around in different directions when i listen to it which is a big plus for me. again the boys being so involved with the producing does a lot, it makes it more personal and i feel like it shines through. (jaebum miming along to the chorus of teenager fx.) also i get caught up in feels when i listen to it, it makes me want to belt out the songs with them and i have had too many loudly singalongs to this album. at work, at home, in my head walking the streets. 

4. Cave Me In - Gallant, Tablo & Eric Nam

this song is just. wow. just fucking wow. listen to it, feel it in your body and then scream at how good it is okay. their voices blend so well and the flow of the song is so nice. it kind of invites you along. i also really like the lyrics. it’s a song where when it comes on i just kind of stop what i’m doing and listen to it, taking it in. it’s just amazing. 

5. Hush - Primary feat. JB of GOT7

so this is probably also the year i fell in love with jaebum’s voice... i actually really liked the whole album. it was filled with some of my favourite kpop vocals of all time and i would’ve put the whole album on here but i had to limit myself. this song though made me realise how good jaebum could sound if his voice is utilized correctly. sometimes in got7 songs his voice can end up rather shrill which hurts my ears. but in this one it’s again kinda mellow and soft even when he goes into the higher notes. it makes it extremely pleasant to listen to. really well produced.

6. Circles - G.Soul

another full album, but the last one. i’ve always enjoyed g.soul’s voice. and i absolutely adored his dirty album. i have at some point since the release of this album had all of the songs on repeat. again it’s such a well produced album that even if goes from a party song like tequila to the more slow and relaxing beat of can’t it doesn’t feel out of place. you get to appreciate his vocals in a completely new way that you didn’t when he was under jype. it’s sultry and inviting in all the right ways and so relaxing. if you haven’t heard it pls listen to it. 

7. Plz Don’t Be Sad - Highlight 

their first comeback after leaving cube and it was perfect. beast were always consistent with their comebacks and it seems like highlight will be too. this is such a fun and happy song and it makes me smile when i listen to it. the music video made me chuckle. this is all in all just a song that makes me so happy and smiley. and they all looked so good, so so good. 

8. Swimming Fool - Seventeen Performance Unit. 

another happy song. this song is perfect for this unit because it’s a song that makes you wanna dance. it’s a song that has a vibe of being carefree and loving life. i just can’t help but smile when it comes on, and wriggle in my seat if i’m sitting down. i see swimming pools and the ocean in my mind when i listen to this song. 

9. Artist - Zico

fun song, fun mv, fun everything. i want to sing along to this song when it comes on. i want to groove with the music and i let myself drift along to the playful beat. it so light and kind of airy?? i like the small sounds laying over the beat. the sax that comes in shortly and as always the way zico plays with the flow is incredible. 

10. Really Really - Winner

i adored their last comeback with taehyun and i was worried how they would do without his vocals because their music before has relied alot on it. especially jinwoo since i figured there would be an increase in lines for him. he’s not the strongest vocal but wow i was impressed. the flow of the song, the blend of voices and the use of jinwoo’s soft warm voice really really (kekeke) got me. it’s a song that makes you want to dance, it’s a song that you can’t help but fall for.

11. Egoist - Roy Kim

this is probably my least favourite album from roy. which is evident in the way that i haven’t listened it to death. the title song though, so light and fun. it’s a song that kind of gives me the feeling of being full of happiness. his voice is soft and soothing and the melody and beat is playful. it makes me think of summer and that’s really what he does so well. making albums fitting each season that you can’t help but mentally teleporting to that season. 

12. Not Today - BTS

i love this song. the beat that’s heavy but kinda funky? like it seems more based on a bass than a drum which yesh please. it flows so well and the chorus. again it’s a song that sweeps me along for the ride and i can’t help but sing along or mime and have fun with them. also i like making weird faces to this song which i have no idea why. 

13. Ko Ko Bop - EXO

ko ko bop is a bop. so summer chill and relaxing. their vocals shine through. in the beginning i had a hard time with the breakdown because i enjoy the chillness of the verses. every time i hear it i sees light clouds on a blue sky. the styling tho why oh god why. 

14. Oh Hey Yeah - Gikwang

this song again is so chill. i just want to lay down and listen to his voice. i was really excited for his solo comeback and i love the whole album. another example of a voice used right. he’s not the strongest vocal and his low tones a so much more comfortable to listen to and this is a song full of them. i kinda just melt listening to his voice in this song. it’s almost as if he’s whispering the song into your ear while you’re cuddling. 

15. Honeymoon - B.A.P

first of i love this mv. the colours blew me away. what really got me with this song is their vocals. there’s not as many high notes in this song compared to their other titles songs. and while i love the high notes of daehyun, he’s deeper tones takes me to fucking paradise. also what’s up jongup when did your voice becomes so fucking amazing? it’s a song that makes me happy and think of the ocean (which is apparently happiness for me??) the rap blends in well and yeah. i’m in love with how all of their voices sounds in the song. gives me the feels. 

16. Empty Road - Taeyang

i haven’t really been as excited over the different releases from bb this year as i usually am. i think the whole thing with tabi really threw me out of it. it’s really evident since this list is missing gd songs and only has a single yb song. i like the softness of this song and it kind of reminds me of my childhood. the guitar and melody feels familiar to me and it’s super relaxing. his voice doesn’t go shrill and he’s using a lot of his lower tones which is when i love his voice the most. 

17. Here Comes the Regrets - Epik High feat. Lee Hi

i haven’t heard this song as much and mostly it because it hits so hard. the emotions in their voices kills me. first of all lee hi and her gorgeous voice. the chorus gives me goosebumps. tablo and his voice, first of fuck you how are you so good at heartbreak, second so good i love you. mithra rapping in english?? omfg wow okay i’m so impressed by everything. then that beat tukutz why. so many fucking feels. so good. i just can’t fucking handle it. also can we just talk about the brigde? the deepness of her voice unf. 

honorable mentions because i need to: lip & hip - hyunah, ganisha - sunmi, red flavour & peek-a-boo - red velvet, crazy sexy cool - astro, lalala - babylon feat. chungha, bling bling - ikon, 365 fresh - triple h, rumor & oh nana - kard, i’m good - henry feat. nafla, sleepover - hayley kiyoko, milion eyes - loïs nottet (he’s a dancer and it’s a beautiful dance music video. watch it).  

i want to tag: @thechoi-choi, @divaaboo :D 

[dprwolfgang]

Lights Down Low // Jay Park Series

Note: There’s a couple p.o.v changes in this one.Enjoy!

2.Call Me Gray

Part 1

Jay’s P.O.V

"Dean and Zico just went live.Looks like they're in the same place but damn this group is lit.They are killing your routine Park." Gray said as he watched his phone screen.Wanting to see what he was fussing about Loco and Simon both huddle around him staring down at his screen as well.

"Someone just said 'giving Jay Park a run for his money'." Loco laughed.

"Dean won't say who they are but whoever is doing your part is badass.He hit every one of those moves on point.Flawless." Simon added.Curiosity got the best of me as I pulled out my phone and hopped on Dean's live. The comments were going wild,a lot of people thinking it was me dancing and for a moment I would have to if I didn't see that ass.

"There's no way that's a guy dancing my part." I mumbled more to myself but the guys heard and looked up at me for an explanation.

"That type of booty does not belong to a man." I explained before Simon commented on what type of booty was it exactly."That's the type of booty that bring tears to your eyes bro.That's an onion booty but on a real note who's that though?"

"Dean didn't say but I texted him and he sent me her YouTube and SoundCloud.That's about it,he won't give me anything else." Gray said.He shared a link to the television in the room and we all turned to look at it.We watched a couple of her videos and I gotta say I was impressed with what I saw.We got back to work after but Gray seemed to be contemplating something whatever it was he'd come talk to me when he's ready.

Leya’s P.O.V

"Jiho if you don't give me back my phone.." I threatened and he laughed."..Hyuk get your friend!" I turned to Dean who was looking at us laughing. I have no idea what's so funny. I didn't even think Zico would adjust to me so easily but he hadn't even been here a week and he was behaving like Dean.Don't get me wrong I love Dean but the man can be a pain in the ass when he's ready.They gave each other a look before Zico handed my phone over and dropped down on the couch next to Dean.

My phone vibrated in my hand showing someone had messaged me on Instagram.Retreating to my room I opened it and sat on my bed.

@callmegray : hey just came across one of your beats on SoundCloud and I was wondering if you'd like to meet up and work together sometime. I'm in LA for a couple days so let me know when you see this.

I reread that entire thing a good three times not believing that the GRAY wanted to work with me. The guy was my inspiration when I just started messing around with production so you can totally understand my fan girl moment.Right?

@missleyajae: hey..uhh as amazing as this is I'm gonna need some proof that this is actually Gray and not someone fucking with me.

@callmegray: uhh sure?

@missleyajae: a picture of you smiling next to a dog please 😊

He opened the chat but took a while to reply and I kinda lost hope that he was the real deal.Half hour later my phone vibrated as I walked back into my room.

@callmegray: I had to drive to my friend's house just to get this picture and I'm praying it's worth it.

I screamed.Yes I screamed and I'm not ashamed about it.After replying we kept talking until it was about 2am. I had no idea what time it was in Korea but I didn't ask.He'd be here tomorrow and we'd get to work after he settled. I had a feeling Kwon had a part to play in this but seeing as he always complains that I never let him do anything for me I'll let him slide this time.

Rolling over in my bed I turned of my alarm.Dragging myself out of bed I went to the bathroom and handled my business before getting ready for the day.Keeping my outfit simple I applied a light layer of makeup and put on a baseball cap to finish off my look.Grabbing my bag I put my laptop,headphones,midi keyboard and chargers in before picking up my phone and heading down the hall. The house was quiet so I'm guessing Dean and Zico didn't come back last night. I took an apple out the fruit bowl and got my car keys before leaving and heading to the studio where I told Gray I'd meet him.

Parking in my usual spot I entered the building greeting the girls at the front desk and leaving Gray's name on the list.Entering the room I regularly used when I wasn't producing at home I flipped the light switch on and got to setting up everything.Satisfied I sat in front of the sound board and started working on a beat that had been in my head since I woke up.

  Gray’s P.O.V

She was so into her work just vibing in her own little world that she hadn't heard when I entered. I wasn't exactly alone but I'd hope that she wouldn't mind.We sat quietly on the couch in the back just listening. The instrumental sounded good but it was missing something and I think she noticed too cause she ran her hand over her face groaning as she spun in her chair.

"Sesange! Lee Sunghwa..dio didn't your mother teach you not to sneak up on people." She exclaimed holding her hand over her heart.

"I'm sorry.." I replied trying not to laugh."..you were just in your zone and I didn't want to interrupt plus it sounded great from what I heard and it's Gray,just call me Gray." I replied.She smiled at me before she spoke.

"It's missing something,I don't know what yet but I'll figure it out." She sighed.

"We could work on it together if you'd like." I suggested but as she opened her mouth to reply my friend cleared his throat from beside me catching her attention.Great.Cue the star struck fan girl screaming.1,2,3....where's the fan girl tantrum? I turned to her to see her looking at me expectedly.

"Uhh Gray aren't you going to introduce me to your friend?" She asked and again before I could say anything he cut in.

"The name's Park,Jay Park." He said flashing her his signature smirk.Knowing Jay as long as I have you pick up certain things and right now the look he was flashing her meant he was up to no good. I mean I'm not blind and any man with eyes could certainly appreciate her beauty but I couldn't let him fuck this up for me with his reputation with females.Didn't he have Bora with him back at the hotel?

"Is that supposed to impress me?" She asked looking between the both of us. I nearly choked as I started laughing.Jay's mouth hung slightly open as if he couldn't believe what she just said.

"Yo,you just scored major points in my book for that one." I said patting Jay on his back.

"Look I don't know what kinda girls you're used to throwing themselves at you and shit but in here.." she gestured to the studio."..you're a normal ass man okay.Don't for a second think that you're gonna flash that smirk and I'm gon' kiss yo ass."

Damn she's feisty.Jay finally closed his mouth but not before mumbling something under his breath."I'm sorry what was that?" She asked cupping her ear and leaning towards us.

Rolling his eyes he replied with a smirk."I said you ain't gotta be such a bitch.Could've just said I don't like you and be done."he crossed his arms over his chest.She pinched the bridge of her nose taking a deep breath then looked at him standing up and walking to us.She grabbed Jay by his ear and pulled him up dragging him towards the door.He didn't even have time to react before she pulled the door open and she pushed him out.

"You gon' keep your disrespectful ass out here until you learn some goddamn manners you pendejo!" I have no idea what that last word meant but she caught an accent. The look on Jay's face was priceless as she slammed the door in his face and locked it.

"Right where were we?" She asked me as she made her way back to her previous seat.Just like that we got down to work.We actually finished up the instrumental she was working on before we took a break.

"I'm going to go get some food,you want anything?"

"Yeah coffee please and surprise me I guess." I said not taking my eyes off my laptop screen.Lyrics had already started flowing through my mind and I needed to get them out.Jay came in as she exited and sat where she had.

"You good bro?" I asked my eyes still focused on my screen.

"Oh so now you ask if I'm good? What happened when she was dragging my ass by my ear?" I laughed.He deserved it.

"Jay you kinda brought it upon yourself.Not every girl cares about your status and not to mention you disrespected her in her space.You as an artist know how we feel about disrespect.Did you even apologize?"

"I'll do it when she gets back father." He said mockingly."what's that y'all been working on though?" He asked.

"We actually got about three done but so far I've only had lyrics flowing for one." I told him before I played it for him putting it on repeat.

"I like it.It's kind of sensual but got that sexy edge to it." Jay said as he typed something on his phone.

"Lyrics?"

"You know it." he said with a smile.

I had no idea how long she'd been gone for but the heavenly smell of pizza hit my nose as she came in.She placed everything on the small table and sat on the couch.

"I hope you're okay with pizza and they didn't have coffee so I got coquito." She said as she passed me a cup and took one for herself.Jay looked at her expectedly but she just sipped on her drink like he didn't exist.

"Leya.Be nice." I said to her but looked at Jay nudging him in his side.She smiled sweetly and looked at Jay.

"I'm sorry for being disrespectful." Jay apologized his head hanging low like a little kid who just got scolded for doing something wrong.It was quite an amusing sight.

"See that wasn't so hard." Leya passed him a cup before she opened up the pizza box."Eat up boys we got work to do." She said a bright smile beaming on her face.God please don't let Park Jaebum piss her off again that's all I'm asking. I haven't even known her a full day and I already knew that I'd rather her smiling than angry.as amusing as it can be thank goodness it wasn't directed at me.

I didn't know what the fuck coquito was but it sounded exotic so why not? It tasted even better and that triple meat pizza was so damn good. I could just sleep now but like she said we got work to do.

[ted-hyung]

as a b1a4 supremacist, what do you think one should do to get to know them? i only recently kind of got into them because i didnt really know them until sandeul released his solo album

that’s CNU, btw, used to invent long hair before nuest ren or seventeen jeonghan.

also used to rock hipster glasses before it was cool. kang daniel the shoulder gangster? idk her. it’s CNU.

anyway.

where should i start? BUT a major note to take about B1A4 is they went from this:

(RIP FASHUN)

to this:

hallelujah. read more here.

listen, friend, i go way back with B1A4. i literally cried watching this subbed video lmaooo skip to 43:40.

it’s from MTV MATCH UP B1A4 X BLOCK B eps 8. rip me wyd. let’s talk about B1A4 and block b. they were the shits back then yo. 2011 was their debut year; two boy groups from unknown agencies tackling two different genres and images and MTV GOD BLESS MTV GAVE THEM A MATCHING VARIETY SHOW. you can watch B1A4 cuts here and you will see the legendary dread!zico tryna to win over gentle jinyoung-hyung and FAILED BIG TIME who’s crying with me.

block b will always hold a place in my heart. do you know who invented hep hap? it’s block b. their “new kids on the block”, “welcome to the block”, and “blockbuster” albums have no fault. none. but then they’re hep hap no more and i lost them.

B1A4 KOREAN DISCOGRAPHY + PERSONAL SONG REC, from latest to newest. i believe you can find the newest albums on SPOTIFY JFC why can’t day6.

LET’S FLY (2011): please listen to “only one” lmao. “only learned the bad things” was so, so, so sweet for my skinny freshman ass. i love it.

IT B1A4 (2011): lbr “beautiful target” was the best. watch them grow from you zoom zoom my heart like a rocket to CNU’s iconic everybody say la la. also “chu chu chu” was super chill. “fooool”? you’d find yourself singing along upon first listen.

IGNITION (2012): EVERYTHING IN THIS ALBUM BUT THE TITLE TRACK AKA MY HYUNG JUNG JINYOUNG’S FIRST TACKLE ON PRODUCING GEMS. also sandeul has a solo track here TITLED “CRUSH” GO FIND IT NOW.

IGNITION SPECIAL EDITION (2012): “baby goodnight” is so iconic i’m still side-eyeing newer idols who aren’t singing it to the camera while they’re preparing to go to sleep LMAOOOOOOOOO.

IN THE WIND (2012): yes they graced us BANA with 3 albums back in 2012. “TRIED TO WALK” HANDS DOWN ONE OF THEIR BEST SONGS. TOP 5. i’m the president of na honja ireoke opening line. i have a shrine for that line. the most impactful opening line of all songs, korean or not. amen. listen to all tracks please please. you’ll find the B1A4 distinct flavor on “what do you want to do”. like. go. now.

WHAT’S HAPPENING (2013): B1A4 wore fancy stuffs during this promotion. me ghosta. but DO YOU LIKE BALLAD? “good love” had me on the floor. then i read the translation and i died.

WHO AM I (2014): jesus lord and savior. this album. jesus f christ man THIS ALBUM. LISTEN TO EVERY SINGLE THING HERE PLEASE. “baby” further wow me about baro’s voice. “too much” WHICH IS SANDEUL + GONGCHAN’S DUET? fuck lmao we’re talking about heartbreak here and mine’s bleeding whenever i listen to “too much”. “DRUNK WITH MUSIC” tho. wow CNU-hyung. killed. this. concept. i can’t. you’re lying if your shoulders aren’t moving along and if your head isn’t nodding along. it’s THAT good. you’ll feel the swag. seriously.

SOLO DAY (2014): summer means “solo day”. period. it’s my summer jam. it should be YOURS. “drive” is so so so good. it has asphalt in the lyric. honestly do listen. also if you’re JYP stan do realize B1A4 had collaboration with min and suzy and in this album, sunmi. awesome.

SWEET GIRL (2015): oh my girl visual slash vocal slash handsome girl jiho is in the music video for the title track “sweet girl”. life’s good. in “wait” BARO IS SINGING I REPEAT BARO IS SINGING AND BANA prolly cried everywhere. and jinyoung wailing i can’t stop thinking about you girl everyday, everyday? LMAO BYE.

GOOD TIMING (2016): “a lie”, undoubtedly quenched BANA’s thirst after one whole year. have you watched “a lie” live on music shows? if the ‘touch my cheek tell me i’m not lying’ isn’t the best point of all dance point then idk what to trust. yes, i’m that supremacist LMAO. “crushing on you again” is so sweet, so very winter season love song aka B1A4’s very own color. they should be dubbed as winter season kings because their releases during fall/winter (in the wind, who am i, good timing) are the be(a)sts. “nightmare” paved the road for winner’s “really really” LMAO i’m joking. but not really. i mean baro and mino are practically brothers. “in dreams” sounds so fucking dreamy, like i said, totally winter season love song. “i’ll find you” makes me long for someone it shall inspire y’all. “together” is the one last song that leaves you wonder if these singing strangers are really worth our money and time and dedication and the answer is YES BECAUSE B1A4 RECORDED THIS SONG WITH KOREAN BANAS. jesus.

okay.

it’s july 2017. my bro baro is acting in a drama now. sandeul, your man, has collab with a starship kid. does it mean we’re going to have another winter season album? i’d say amen.

bonus: this is my fave pic of them.

if you’ve heard of it jinyoung is a composer. he’s well noted by other idols and important people in the industry lmao. he also acts. wow. i don’t follow girl groups, but LMAO THIS SONG? “AT THE SAME PLACE” MADE BY JINYOUNG HELPED B1A4 TO GET MORE RECOGNITION. this time i gotta thank mnet for the opportunity. and for the girls who were so sweet fangirling towards my hyung jung jinyoung.

listen to my ult oh my girl’s “one step two step” here and say yes that you can hear jinyoung’s magic there. i’ll just link to the BEST FANCAM EVER.

HERE’S THEM SINGING THE LEGENDARY SONG THEMSELVES:

AND JINYOUNG COMPOSED THE NEWEST GIRL GROUP BOP “DEEP BLUE EYES” wow my hyung shall be crowned as THE PRINCE OF GIRL GROUP BOPS. like.

i cry a lot. but promise this is the last time. i cried watching sandeul’s music video for his solo debut “stay as you are” but y kno it already. help my bro reach 1 million views before a year please.

fun fact: been with them since 2011. never got into shipping business, just here purely for the music and the people. they’re like friends that i’ve known for a long time; we don’t necessarily stay in touch but i always think of them fondly, y feel? i find new friends as i get older every year, yet i’ll always be the first to congratulate them if they reach another milestone in their respective lives y kno? moral of this story: don’t ship for a long lasting stanning TROOLOLOLOLLOLOLO.

this is comprehensive.

i hope i helped.

everyone please have a good weekend.

[im-cxnfused-blog]

Top 9 Albums of 2017

Lets go!

I was tagged by @a-r-m-y-g-i-r-l to post a list of my top 9 albums of 2017. I’m just going to stick to kpop, otherwise we would be here for hours. This was quite difficult, purely because i love so much music! I stg music is the only thing that keeps me going on the daily and idk what i’d do without it. 

*This is from least favorite to most favorite i think? It’s in some sort of order anyway*

(I’ve included links to all the songs i mention)

9. SQUARE TWO - BlackPink  My favorite song(s): Playing with fire 

8. SQUARE TWO - BlackPink My favorite song(s): Boombayah (Theres nothing much to say about this one, it’s just a classic) , Whistle (I’m gay)

7. NCT 127 - The 1st and 2nd mini album.  (I grouped two albums together here because i just couldn’t choose) This album is just so good i can’t  My favorite song(s): Limitless (Wow! This song just blew me away tbh)

6. EX’ACT - The 3rd Album - EXO (Every song in this is great, and its just a great one to listen to tbh) My favorite song(s): Heaven (This song just means a lot to me tbh, and was the inspiration for this blog) , Monster (Very easy to listen and get addicted to, also the dance practice is shockingly powerful)

5. The War - The 4th Album - EXO (KoKoBop was the only thing that made this so high on the list tbh) My favorite song(s): KoKoBop (Actually the best) , The eve (Holy shit the dance practice, would 100% recommend if you are attracted to sehuns hip thrusts)

4. WELCOME 2 BASTARZ  (Can we just talk about this sub-unit! It’s so incredible and the sound of their music has me in pain and tbh this should be further up and it would be if Zero for Conduct was also in this album. I just love the fact that the majority of the songs in this are dominated by Pyos incredible painstaking voice. Basically this album kills me and it has to be here.) My favorite song(s): Make it Rain (Fuck all i can say is how bloody sexy Pyos voice is in here yes he is my ult bias i think you get it)

3. Her - Block B  (This needs so much praise it hurts, all the songs are just so good and catchy, not to mention how amazing the overall sound and aesthetic is. I need to personally thank whoever made this a thing its amazing.) My favorite song(s): Her (They couldn’t have chosen a better title song tbh. Despite the fact that the entire thing feels like a drug trip, it’s so easy and fun to listen to and can brighten any mood tbh) , Very Good Rough.Ver (Very Good, is in fact very good-but the rough version is more than that. It could be Pyos lines again)

2. Boys and Girls - Zico (Holy shit, my love for this album is unbelievable. Apart from Lu - yes im trash- it is actually the only thing i listen to. I just love Zicos voice so much and the guy is so talented.) My favorite song(s): Predator (The first time i listened to this i was confused, the second time - i fell in love. ) , Veni Vidi Vici (This could easily be my favorite song on this entire list, it’s so incredibly made and so easy to listen to i stg)

1. MONTAGE - Block B  (Okay, yes- the top 4 on this list are all something to do with Block B. But who can blame me? All 7 of them are incredible and what they produce is beyond words. This band keeps me going every day, no matter how bad my day turns out, and i’ve never loved 7 idiots more. I was so excited for this comeback and it was so much better than i expected it to be. The music is incredible, the aesthetic is stunning and they have all put so much work into it. I recommend listening to this entire album, or even purchasing it as i did, as it will get you through anything. Each song is so unique and has it’s own amazing charm, and theres no doubt i’ll continue to listen to it for years.) Notable songs: All of them!  (Though, shall we dance is a personal favorite because of pyos lines :’) )

I don’t have many friends on here, so i’m only going to tag @ithinkilikeit-reactions to do this challenge if they haven’t already. But feel free to do it and say you were tagged by me, because i’d love to learn about everyones music taste.