#I think I've also made myself forget a lot from the first 2 times

[damiemontclair]

Is it ridiculous to think maybe this whole hospital thing and related business has mildly traumatised me? Is it ridiculous that I want to write about it in excruciating detail, just get the experience out on paper, on my blog, somewhere? It feels dumb but I want to write fic about it. I think it'd fix me.

[theabigailthorn]

Hey I’ve been a fan for a little while now, and I just wanted to say that you’ve been an inspiration for me, a younger transfemme. But I do wanna also ask: what’s it like being a trans woman with her life together? I’m 19 (as of sending), been on hrt for almost 5 months, and have been trans for a year and change. But I’m scared. So, I guess, I wanted to ask: does being trans ever become the norm, my baseline? What’s it like after 2-3 years? And does it get any less confusing or scary?

I think there are a few things going on here.

I don't have my life together as much as it might seem; I just don't show you all the ways it's not. I don't talk publicly about the auditions I don't get, or the things I try and fail at, or the insecurities in my own head that hold me back sometimes, or the handful of decisions I've made that were bad calls and which still keep me up occasionally. I've talked about trauma and mental illness in the past, but I only ever discuss stuff I'm comfortably over - when I'm overwhelmed or in the middle of a crisis I don't post about it. I don't set out to deceive you by presenting myself that way, I just keep my most private stuff private. Everybody has failures and regrets and insecurities: "it's a sign of having lived," as my friend Phoebe told me today. But you see a curated version of me that appears not only more together than the real person, but more together than any real person.

Also, if you're 19 a lot of your life hasn't been in your control until pretty recently and a lot of it still might not be. I'd say it's okay to not feel like you have it all together. You just transitioned, which I think is one of the hardest things a human being can do: you can give yourself credit for that even if you feel like you're not settled into it yet. Congratulations!

As for it becoming the baseline, I mean yeah? Kinda? At least for me. Sometimes I forget. I had a moment today in the gym where I saw a man and I was like "Oh yeah, I used to be one of them, sortof? Weird!" The first year is the hardest, or so they say. I wouldn't say I get less confused or scared now, just scared and confused in different ways. I worry less about getting attacked in the street than I did in my first year, for example. (I'm lucky and privileged in that regard.) But I worry a lot more about other people. I struggle a lot with survivor's guilt, which is something only people who survive get! Anyone who's had a drink with me in the last six months has heard me beat myself up because the night of The Prince premiere in New York was the night of Brianna Taylor's vigil in the UK. That wasn't a deliberate decision - the premiere was booked and paid for months before she was even killed - but I've become a lot more sensitive to those sorts of feelings precisely because I spend less time worrying about myself. I'm more aware now of what my transness means for other people. Like, I made an ironic joke when I came out that I'd become The Transgender Princess of TERF Island, and it's kindof haunted me since - I didn't set out to become "a famous trans person" but it's happened a little bit and it's going to happen a lot more next year. That comes with serious responsibilities and a few mild drawbacks, as well as perks, obviously. So I guess that's a longwinded way of saying I might be a weird person to ask this question because, at least for right now, my transness, my whole self, doesn't just belong to me.

Oh also, some great advice I got from my friends: Paris: "Only change the things that bother you on your good days," and Mattie: "Don't believe anything you think about your life after 9pm."

[raikanata]

Taking Care of a Difficult Child - Mayoi Ayase Feature Scout 2 4* Story

[ Read on my site for a better viewing experience using Ois~su♪ ]

Warning: This is a Fan TL and is not proofread.

Characters: Mayoi, Tomoya, Tatsumi

Season: Winter

Mayoi: So you're asking m-me to take care of Hokuto-senpai?

Tomoya: I'm sorry to ask so suddenly. It turned out that our next location wasn't going to be a day trip.

I can't take Hokuto-senpai to work with me, and the pet shop manager hasn't returned to Japan yet, so...

I'm looking for someone who can take care of him until I return from work...

Mayoi: I see. I understand your situation.

Well... I'm very happy that you came to me for help, but...

I really don't think I'm suited to take care of Hokuto-senpai...!

Even when you first got Hokuto-senpai, I mostly spent time in another room so I wouldn't get in your way...

Um, umm... Can't you ask the people in "ANIMALS" for help, like you did before?

Tomoya: Well, I tried to ask them. But it looks like everyone already has plans on that day.

They can only be back by the evening...

Mayoi: And someone has to take care of Hokuto-senpai until then, right...

(Wh-what should I do? I more or less know how to take care of Hokuto-senpai, since I watched Mashiro-san doing it...)

(Even though I know how to care for him, I don't know if he'll listen to me at all.)

(Nevermind that, if something was to happen to Mashiro-san's precious Hokuto-senpai because I wasn't able to take care of him properly...)

Tomoya: ...I'm sorry, Ayase-senpai. I put you in a difficult position by asking something like this so suddenly.

Mayoi: No, I...

Tomoya: Please forget about it. I'll try and ask some other people as well.

Mayoi: (I've troubled Mashiro-san a lot, not only in the "Dead End Cafe", but also as a roommate...)

(I want to return the favor if I can...)

(After all, he came to me for help. There must have not been anyone else that he could ask.)

I, I got it!

Tomoya: Ayase-senpai...?

Mayoi: If the members of "ANIMALS" can make it towards the night...

I will accept the responsibility, and take care of Hokuto-senpaii!

Time: The next day

Mayoi: Then... Let's get along today, Hokuto-senpai ♪

(Since Tomoya-san is off to work, from here on, I have to take great care of him..!)

Uum, Mashiro-san already fed him, so next up...

Mayoi: Eek!? Hokuto-senpai cried out suddenly...! What's wrong!?

I'msorryI'msorryy, I know someone like me isn't fit to take care of you!

But please, be a little patient with me...!

Ah, where are you going...! Please waaiiit!

Tatsumi: (I'm relieved that my vegetables seem to be growing nicely♪)

(Right. Before I forget, let me send this picture I took to everyone in "Gardenia". Uuh, to attach an image...)

(...Hm? There's a familiar crying sound coming from somewhere.)

(The source of the voice... seems to be Mayoi-san and Tomoya-san's room. That means...)

Mayoi-san, Tomoya-san. It sounds like Hokuto-senpai is crying. Did something happen?

(No answer. I can still hear the crying, but no sound from Mayoi-san or anyone else...)

(I'll have to invite myself in, Mayoi-san!)

Tatsumi: This is!? Mayoi-san, are you okay!?

Mayoi: Uuu...?

Tatsumi: Why did you collapse in the room like this!?

Where is Tomoya-san!? What exactly happened here!?

Mayoi: ...Ah, God must be so merciful as to allow even a person such as myself to receive a final call of fate...

Tatsumi: Please hang on! This isn't a final call of anything!

Mayoi: Uuu... I'm sorry to make you worry like this...

I was so deeply focused on taking good care of Hokuto-senpai, I forgot to take care of myself, even to eat...

But I never thought that I'd pass out... If Tatsumi-san didn't find me, who knows what would have become of me...

Tatsumi: You're exaggarating. However, I'm relieved that you seem better now.

Mayoi: You even made toast for me. Thank you so much, really.

Tatsumi: It's Hokuto-senpai that you should thank. I was alerted to the situation thanks to his cries.

Mayoi: I-is that so. Thank you, Hokuto-sen--

Eek!? Why are you screaming so much? Did, did I do something to offend you...?

Uuu, you really won't listen to me...

What do I do... At this rate, we won't even make it until everyone from "ANIMALS" arrives.

Tatsumi: Please raise your head, Mayoi-san.

Tatsumi: Hokuto-senpai is yelling at me as well, it's not because of you.

I heard from Koga-san that the reason why Tomoya-san started to call him "Hokuto-senpai" was to get him to listen.

He seems to have a bit of a difficult personality, right? We need to get him to let his guard down first.

Mayoi: Let his guard down, huh... But, how...

Tatsumi: That's right. Is there anything that Tomoya-san uses regularly when taking care of him?

Mayoi: Well, there's a blanket on the bed over there, but...

Tatsumi: I heard that having an item around that carries their smell, or their owner's smell, is calming for animals.

Using that, maybe we can try and see whether we can get Hokuto-senpai to lower his guard?

Mayoi: I see...! It's bath time right now, so I'll try to take him to the bathroom with the blanket!

He-here! This way, Hokuto-senpai! It's bath time now♪

Ah, he's walking this way...!

....but, ahh! He completely stopped in his tracks!

Tatsumi: Hm, it's not going all that well.

Mayoi: N-no! When I take a step back, he also takes a step forward...! I just can't get any closer to him!

Tatsumi: That's fine. We can work like this until Koga-san and the others arrive.

Mayoi: Yes! Like this, I'll succeed in taking care of Hokuto-senpai properly ♪

Tatsumi: That's right, keep going, Mayoi-san.

Tomoya: ...Ah. Akehoshi-senpai sent me a text.

"Hokuto-senpai's doing just fine~!", it says.

Hm, there's a picture attached too... This is, Ayase-senpai feeding Hokuto-senpai?

I'm glad that Hokuto-senpai seems to be listening to Ayase-senpai seriously...

I have to thank Ayase-senpai properly. Let's get him a nice souvenir before returning home ♪

Tomoya: ....That aside, why does Ayase-senpai seem to be holding my clothes that should have been in the laundry basket?

[ ☆ ]

[mecachrome]

your oscar primer was absolutely brilliant, thank you so much for posting it!! well-researched, well-written, and a good balance of educational and hilarious. if you want to share, i’d be very interested in reading any of the parts you mentioned that you cut out, like george-admiring, oscar’s psyche, etc, but no pressure ofc 🫶

omg no thank you so much for your kind words, i appreciate it a lot!!! :D andddd let me see... honestly i was just going to add a few more quotes & anecdotes from other people about his personality but i ended up incorporating most of them into the primer (e.g. mark's), but in general i think it's really charming how Every Single Adult who has ever worked with oscar throughout the years is so deeply and immediately convinced of his maturity. i did work in most of this old ask but it has a few extra quotes in there from mclaren personnel! anyway more below the cut:

i guess really the thing to Me about oscar is like...... idk if this makes any sense but i personally love how he's naturally a really gracious and diplomatic person but is also deeeeeply self-assured and objective, which on one hand means he presents as quite humble when he doesn't make excuses for himself or get caught up in deceptively high results, but on the other also means he refuses to give anyone else credit for his own success; if you remember me briefly mentioning prematax in that post he talks about it in the f1fs pod where he basically goes i didn't win because of PREMA, in fact i've NEVER LOST TO A TEAMMATE, SO. like any racing driver that is def a big source of pride for him, and i think it speaks to the "silent killer" (per lando) side to him, the guy who mark says "falls asleep" when hearing stories of his (championless) career, who said that he supported mark out of national obligation growing up but—let us not forget—vettel was the one winning everything back then anyway, who says he put even more pressure on himself to win his final race in f2 despite having clinched the title 2 races prior because he felt the innate urge to prove that he wouldn't simply ease off the gas pedal and still had it in himself to subjugate the field one last time.

along these lines oomf and i have discussed before how he and alex rank similarly on the kind/nice dichotomy in a way that is slightly diametric to lando, wherein he is always willing to offer tidy bits of sympathy for someone else's struggles but doesn't ever really envision any of them as relevant to his own experiences, because getting caught up in that "external noise" would be a waste of time (even with logan in the f3 finale it was honestly kind of like "aw man that sucks, i'd hate for it to be me... ANYWAY"). like not to maybe exaggerate his interiority but i enjoy that he carries an amount of hidden tension that he obviously consciously decides to not take reactionary measures over—though that doesn't mean it isn't there, it's just very well regulated (unrelated but he does actually work with mental coach emma murray, who also works with scott mclaughlin and whom he says helped him center himself at the end of his eurocup season). but he's still very... unfiltered about when he's been disrespected in an unperturbed, straightforward manner, like saying otmar confronting him on the sim over being promoted to the seat was "bizarre and frankly upsetting," the face he made when he was told they'd overtaken alpine in the standings in 2023, telling the kids in that hp tuners interview that the renault engineers treated his first f1 test too nonchalantly, etc. 😭 like every interview back when he was a reserve driver was soooo "i'm gracious about being stuck in this role but also i've proven myself way too much to Not Hate This Compromise and i'll be pissed as hell if i don't get a seat next year"... i'll stop here but basically he is truly a master of balancing gritted-teeth conviction with his tactical charm and it is one of my fav things ever about him!!!

also another quote i love is this one from david sera about his driving style, because 1) i love the correlation between it and his personality/calmness, 2) i'm obsessed with the dynamic of his early rc days helping nurture a style of "finesse" in his driving throughout his junior career that may not have appeared naturally if he'd only begun racing in karting (and subsequently how he had to learn to not get "muscled around" after moving to europe), and 3) of course as a noted jb22 appreciator i love when people note similarities in his inputs to jb because it is delicious to ME:

Coming from a remote control car background where concentration, finesse and smooth inputs, these were the traits we saw in Oscar in the cadet category. [...] You would often see other drivers have an advantage in the early part of the race, driving more aggressively, but Oscar had a more calm approach.

c__c but back to the first part of the ask and our good friend russell jorge, i'm mostly obsessed with oscar's reactions to his performance at the rollercoaster that was spa 2021 and the fact that he's been so vocally appreciate of george "outperforming" the car he was in. the 2 instances of the word HERO on his twitter:

and then this quote in an interview he did in 2022:

"[Success] is definitely not just defined by just world championships, and if you can outperform the car that you're in—I think George Russell has been a very fine example of that in years previous, you know, constantly getting the most out of that Williams and of course Spa. (laughs) Bit controversial, but he got a podium at the end of the day! And even without that, he qualified second, he outqualified everyone except Max in a Williams, which, you know, is an unbelievable result."

also george being the only f1 driver (i think) to tweet him for his f2 title :saluting_face:

AND ALSO THEM SHARING THE ANECDOTE OF THEIR AWKWARD FIRST MEETING ON THE FAST & CURIOUS POD??? aka oscar was told in his april 2023 ep that they were going to interview george next and he was like oh ok you can ask him about our "slightly left-field introduction," and then they had george on who was like oh yeah i met oscar for the first time washing our hands together in the bathroom on our way to the ausgp in 2020 😭 what a way to meet.

[morphinejunkie]

Hi morph! I've been following you since i read crush the first time, I admire your talent and your way of working, so accurate and almost scientific! I will always thank you for that and I hope to read new writings from you soon.

I noted someone asked you for advice on writing mello, and now I would like to ask you for advice on writing matt, if you would like to answer! Writing matt is freer (as there is little canon information), but it is also more difficult, because of that. Did you use a different process? Did you create a spectrum for him too? Thanks for all you do ❤️

thank you so much, and sorry for the late response to this one.

here's my post about writing mello.

now writing matt is different as you mentioned because he is such an open character. you could interpret him however you'd like, based on the little information that canon has given you. there are a lot of possible interpretations to matt that will make sense - i think, contrary to mello where you constantly have to assess/compare your characterization with his motivations and goals in death note, with matt, the most important question is: does he feel real?

i found that because matt is so open, people tend to write him based on fantasy. this makes him so incredibly two-dimensional as a result, because he ends up becoming just a blank character for people to fill their desires, wishes, and projections on. i find that very often in fanfic he ends up basically just being a bland sum of the author's romantic/sexual interests, a direct reflection of the author's identity, or a blank canvas on which mello can extricate influence.

i'm not saying that's bad or not a good way to write him, but for me, i wanted matt to be a fully rendered, realized individual, independent of myself. you really have to treat matt as an OC, so a lot of this could double up as "how to create a realistic fictional character" advice.

this is what worked for me:

backstory

obviously the most important thing about how to write a character is knowing where they come from and how they became who they ended up becoming. so ask yourself the following questions:

where does matt come from? -> this answers his baseline cultural identity and temperament

what was his family life like? -> the dynamics of his family life before he was orphaned is really important in determining how you write his attachment styles and his relationships. things like his relationship with his mother, his father, siblings, wealth, stability, etc. all factor into who he is as a person

when was he orphaned? -> this answers how much of that cultural identity influences him vs. the UK

why is he the way he is now? -> aka why is he so lazy, chill, a chainsmoker, an avid video game player? with mello, canon answered this question for us: mello has a deep-rooted inferiority complex stemming from the competitive conditions of the orphanage. so why is matt so different from him?

2. get to know him OUTSIDE of mello

here's one thing that i find a lot of m2 fans forget while writing matt: he is his own person. a big mistake that i see is a lot of writers write him as a "satellite character" where his motivations, dreams, goals, thoughts, and intentions all exist in a vacuum that is all for the sake of mello. because even if he is somebody who has decided that his entire life is made to please mello (which wouldn't be ooc, though improbable given his personality canonically), he still would have had events in his life that would make him rely on mello so wholeheartedly.

i encourage writing out a character profile for matt that does not mention or reference mello at all. completely extricate mello from his personality and figure him out from there.

lastly, ask yourself: what drew him to mello in the first place? this isn't a given - mello is really not an easy person to be around, so why does matt seemingly have no problems with being with him? i think it's totally fine for matt not to know the answer to this question, and for there to be multiple answers to this question, but my point is, there should be some answers. it should make sense for matt, given the backstory that you've given him, to want to be around mello. matt was not born to love mello, despite what fanfics tend to want to believe.

3. consistently check your own biases

obviously we as writers want to write what we want to see, and again this is fine if you don't mind being indulgent as a writer, but for me personally, i wanted to keep it as objective as i could. i didn't want to create a matt that was a manifestation of myself or some sort of sexual fantasy. i found that the best way to do this was make sure there were times where i disagreed with matt or even found him a little bit personally dislikeable/repulsive - whether it be from his thoughts, emotional reactions, interests, or habits. this is of course not needed but i found it was an easy shorthand to make sure that i wasn't just creating somebody perfect.

4. find real life matts

this one's a little unorthodox, but i felt it was really useful for me in making sure my biases were checked.

when i was writing crush, i would often find users on twitter that reminded me of matt, or gave me a feeling of matt - whether it be through their typing style, their voice, their humour, or their posts - and follow them. seeing the way they interact with the world gave me a better understanding of how someone like matt would also interact with the world, especially in ways that i could never envision. i think for me, i had to come to terms with the fact that matt was not somebody i could create out of scratch based on my life experiences and the place i grew up. so the only way i could better understand him, was to find people who lived like him and acted like him and see what had made them this way.

of course this extends to even basing matt off of your family members, friends, or acquaintances: pulling inspiration from real people is often the best and most authentic way to build a realistic character.

[inked-up-gentleman]

"Stop carrying old feelings into new experiences."

That is what one of your posts says.

I'm curious if you follow this advice for yourself? I ask because I have followed you for a very long time and am very familiar with what you post and how you respond to and answer your anon 'asks'

A lot of the time, it seems as though you blame your past for how you are today and why you don't trust. You respond with words that very much say you're doing exactly that.....allowing your past to carry over into your present. It's very clear you've been hurt and/or screwed over and it's been that way for a LONG time now. When are you going start following that quote? To stop carrying old feelings into new experiences."

I know you love the attention, I mean, who wouldn't? And why would someone post as many photos. gifs, writings/thoughts and anon, asks? You thrive on attention. I'd go as far as to say you need the attention. I think the shit from the past is just an excuse to do exactly what you're doing now which garners tons of traffic and ooooo's and ahhhhh's for you. Is it possible you're not ready to give that up so you keep this front/wall up and use the past as an excuse?

None of this is meant maliciously or judgmentally so hopefully all your groupies stay off my ass about it. That's why I won't ask you off anon. (although I have sent a few asks as myself before so we've had interaction.) I just don't trust that your followers won't respond badly and then start that bully mentality because so many of them seem to be protective (and obsessed) with you. Some of them excessively. I just genuinely wonder if when you saw that post, did you pause and say "yeah, you outta let that shit go man"?

Hope you're having a great weekend.

I wasn't going to respond to this at first but I'll lay it all out for you.

First and foremost, I don't see this as being hostile, but you're definitely making some assumptions here that people have made before. That being said, I ask that anyone who responds to this do so respectfully.

Did I follow that advice from that post myself? Yes, to an extent. You're assuming I don't want to be in a relationship due to last relationship and what my ex put me through. Though that's easy to assume, that's not the entire case. Right now my peace is my number one priority and if I deem it suitable to risk it for someone, I will. Until then, I'm completely content with being alone.

I'm still dealing with the damage, sure. But I've slowly turned that energy into productivity for my business and turning my house into a home. It took time, but everything is slowly coming together. That being said, there's only 1 or 2 people on this entire Hell site that have idea of what I was put through. This was far more than just an 8 year relationship that ended. But I will heal how I see fit.

"you thrive on attention" that's an assumption that YOU made. Yes, I post a LOT of selfies and pictures. But if you take the time to notice, they are pictures of what I enjoy doing. Riding the bike, spending time at the gym, relaxing with the pups, reading, whatever else it may be. Not once have I ever posted a nude of any kind. Which, if I wanted attention, that's probably what I would be doing (no offense to those that do post nudes). The closest thing you'll come to a nude is me wearing silkies, but I also go to public gyms in those.

I post what I post here because this and my TikTok account are the ONLY places I can go to truly be myself without it impacting my personal life or my business and I think a lot of you forget that. I absolutely love all my followers and the support they give me here. But nowhere do you see me trying to lure anyone in with anything. I've been 100% transparent from the start and always will be.

Yes, I get a TON of thirsty asks here. Who doesn't though? And though there are plenty of them, you are also forgetting the ones that ask me about working out, losing weight, starting a workout routine, thinking about getting a bike, first time riding tips and tricks, relationship advice or just for wisdom in general. But I digress...

Did I ever tell myself "yeah, I should let that shit go" absolutely. More than once and long before I ever shared that post. But I still learned some very hard lessons from that experience and it was far more than just pain and trauma that I had to let go.

I hope this answered your questions and helped you (and anyone else that was wondering) understand. And I hope you had a great weekend as well.

[colorfullyminded]

Omg I LOVE your pinescone stories they give me life :3 I have a few questions is you don’t mind

What is your favorite pinescone head cannon?

What is your favorite au?

Which one’s your least?

I saw that you used to write parapines is that still a ship that you write about or will is forever be in your heart?

In a zombie apocalypse how do you think the Pines family including Wendy and Soos etc (+ Wirt & Greg) would go about it? Who would survive?

That’s all the questions I have for now :3

((Thank you so much! I'm so glad you enjoy my writing! It means the world to me. And yes, please feel free to ask any question you have.))

1. My number 1 headcanon is that they are equals-- that even with their strengths and weaknesses, their differences, they both value each other so dearly; to the point you almost forget that they're a crossover ship because of how much these two complete each other. And by that I mean, the two look at each other like the other is the moon and the stars. If these two aren't hopelessly in love and amazed by their partner, I don't want it! I hate when Wirt is forced to be in the back, or is made weaker and more cowardly by the narrative; I hate the concept of Wirt being just a pretty face for Dipper to save, or that anything Wirt can do-- Dipper does better. I don't mind Dipper saving Wirt, I don't mind Wirt being cautious or uncertain, or even afraid-- but I love when Wirt gets to be heroic too (because he is). I love seeing him excel at the things he's good at, and I think he brings strategy to the team dynamic that is not utilized enough; Wirt is the guy who's going to notice Dipper's blindspots and point them out to better strengthen the plan. I love when they both get to be sassy; their personalities would give them such good banter to bounce off each other. They are both adorable, dorky, emotional, but also very hotheaded and stubborn characters. There are few ships where I feel like any direction you go is canonical because of how multifaceted they are as characters (that's not to say I agree or like all of directions, but I can at least acknowledge why that decision was made). Wirt doesn't always have to be the one held up by sticky tape! Out of all the bad end friends-- Wirt is the only one I've see that canonically did not fall for a demon's trick. He never got posessed, he never made a deal, he wasn't tricked--if anything, he actually called the bluff of said Demon (something that Dipper failed the first time) when he was like 14 years old. I want to see more of that in my pinescone. The idea that Wirt would be so easily tricked by Bill just doesn't sit right with me. It never has.

Another headcanon I'm more in favor of: Dipper can cook (I know a lot of people have headcanoned him as the bad cook between him and Mabel, and between him and Wirt-- but he's literally the guy who follows steps and checklist-- what do you mean he doesn't know how to use a cookbook?

If anything, Mabel is the wildcard who can either make something really delicious....or put you in the hospital for food poisoning. You'll notice in my more recent fics the...monstrosities Mabel has loving created in the kitchen, and that she's even been banned from one kitchen before.

So yeah, Dipper can cook, Wirt can cook--and I love the idea of these two cooking together. I have others, but some are a little more risque, and this is already going to be a long ask, so I won't write everything down-- but here are two of my big headcanons (One was more a rant, apologies). 2. My favorite au, I don't wanna sound pretentious, but most Pinescone Au's I enjoy are the ones I've made for myself-- I have a lot of ideas, and so I think up a lot of situations with these dorks, though most are just free floating in my brain right now. Eventually I want to write them all down, but that may take some time. The closest Pinescone au that I enjoy that isn't mine is a mix of monsterfalls/Musume. Basically where Wirt is a human and he falls in love with Deerper-- and the two have to navigate that kind of relationship while certain laws and societal norms want to dissaude them from forming an interspecial relationship (even though in monsterfalls, most people became monsters from other means, rather than just being born monsters) Either way, the idea of Deerper snuggling up to a human Wirt and flirting through Cervitaur mating rituals is so fucking cute-- and I have wanted to write a small series story for that au. Also, just a shout out, but I enjoy @clubsheartsspades Pinescone meet-weirds! Those are such fun aus-- they've made for some of my personal favorite oneshots!

Also, even though they just started, I'm really enjoying that Au where the two start off on the wrong foot in "Horrible First Impressions" by Philia. I want those two to fuck nasty make out in their creative writing class! The tension is so good, and I can't wait to see the turning point where frustration becomes affection. 3. My least favorite au might be more clear-- as you'll notice a lack of two specific....villains in most of my fiction. Basically, Dead Ends Friends, but specifically Murder Husbands is on my low list of au's. To me, Bill and Beast are defeated; I rather the story revolve around Dipper and Wirt facing new challenges and deadly foes-- not the same one's they took care of as children. I don't mind if people like using Bill or Beast (they're great, entertaining villains, I get why people love them). I even love a lot of the art that involves Bipper and Weast; it's amazing art as usual. But I don't consider either aus to be Pinescone-- as it's just Bill and The Beast inhabiting their bodies. I'd enjoy it more if I could see glimpses of Dipper and Wirt in some moments, where they're allowed to take comfort and fall in love before their bodies are once more puppeted by the demons. If the story is just beast and bill doing fucked up things in their host-- with no shift to the real people underneath-- then It's not really what I want to read. I don't mind possession stories, or one being controlled-- I don't mind some darker content (Proxxy is an old Pinescone fic that is still very sexy and fucked-- and it involves Bill possessing Wirt... but the thing is, Wirt doesn't just take a back seat; his thoughts are still being shown to the audience. We still get to know what he's thinking and feeling, even when he has no control over his body). That kind of shit, now that I love. But again, Bill and Beast are NOT Dipper and Wirt to me.

4. Parapines has a soft spot in my heart, but I have moved on from the ship entirely. I made a joke about it once:

(Which again, it's just a joke but it does feel like thousands of years have passed). In all seriousness, I don't think I'll be coming back to the Parapines fandom. I think I once wanted to do a fic where Dipper and Wirt broke up, and for the summer, Dipper started dating Norman, before making up with Wirt again, as a kind of farewell, final sendoff to my old ship. I never finished it, but who knows, I still have the rough draft. I have a lot of WIPS I keep just in case I wanna come back and finish (you'd be surprised how many of my fics were wips for years before I posted them to ao3). 5. In a zombie apocalypse? They all would. We saw the pines family + Wendy and Soos survive a demon apocolypse, I think they can take on a zombie apocalypse as well. Wirt and Greg would be more beat up and worse for wear, but I imagine they could hold their own, until they met up with the Pines Family (though I had one zombie au but that's a different story). Now if they were all separated, or at least how would they stand on their own? Here's what I think (I'll try not to get too graphic): Dipper- Either survives/ Holds out for a long time, but would likely sacrifice himself to save someone he loves--Zombied Mabel- Either Survives/ (If Dipper dies) she would lose hope and probably fall prey to a bite--Zombied Soos- Zombied Stan- Survives / (If both twins Zombied) he would lose hope and be zombied next Ford- Survives Wendy- Survives Pacifica- Zombied Wirt- Would try to hold out if protecting Greg, though may also take his and Greg's life to spare them both. (Self Inflicted). Greg- (If he's young) Zombied without Wirt/ possibly mercy killed by Wirt (if he's an adult): Survives, though heavily traumatized. Maybe having lost a limb to stop a bite from spreading. ((Thank you so much for the ask, I appreciated this so much! Wow this was a lot and I'm so happy <3 I love receiving asks about these two!))

[gabeorelse]

WIP Update: Empire of Death

I'VE FINISHED IT.

Okay, I haven't completely finished it. I still have some edits to do. Scenes to rewrite, some worldbuilding to add, etc. I've also sent it to my CP and she'll definitely get back to me with lots of notes. BUT:

I started this book in November 2023 and wrote a draft that was fun but not nearly what I wanted it to be. Okay, that's fine, first drafts can be like that. But some stuff wasn't working in the concept - I couldn't 100% figure out exactly what I wanted this WIP to be. I put it aside, started on draft 2 in February, and got stuck 50k in. It was drifting even farther away from what I wanted. So I tabled it, and sometime in spring tackled a couple AU versions of the characters to see if the world was the problem. And it sort of was? But not entirely. So I tabled it again and wrote a different book.

Eventually though, I hit upon some stuff that made the world really sing for me, and went back to the original concept: a dark, gory, horror-fantasy world with a lot of humor mixed in. I outlined my third draft in July and started it in August. Finished September 4th. And yeah, it's definitely not perfect, but it has the shape. It's what I want it to be!! And I'm so excited for this book.

A constant reminder to myself: books take time. I write fast (fanfiction skills, yo), but sometimes, fast is not what you need. It can actually be the exact opposite. Impatient as I am, I needed time between drafts to think, experiment, and rest. Will I probably forget this lesson? Yeah. But oh well.

Either way. IT'S DONE!!

Stats:

First draft start date: November 8th 2023

First draft final word count: 84k

Third Draft (Most Recent) Start Date: August 5th, 2024

Third Draft Finish Date: September 4th 2024

Final Word Count: 106k (will probably add 5k in edits)

[grapecaseschoices]

Beloved Grapes 🍇some questions from the fanfic hype ask!

(Also also before the questions: I adore your writing very much!! Even in your tags. There was a recent set of tags where you also wrote something like "I don't know how to word it/I'm not making sense because I'm tired" or something but you had worded it so perfectly beautifully. Anyway. I feel like you also use these really fun turns of phrase which are both unique and always perfectly suited. I still think about the "eye crinkle to eye twinkle ratio" which you wrote in a post about Nat and Kai! Anyway mwah I am eating your writing and your thoughts.)

Terrible OC (In terms of, like, villains. We're being positive today!)

Fic(s) you would/have forced someone else to read

A fun writer quirk you've noticed (Specific word(s) they repeat, detailed setting description, a lot of adjectives, trope they write really well, etc.)

hello pumpkin!

(haha i actually forgot what i wrote that so i am so flattered that you did! like that is really ... i guess touching? i mean i've made no bones that my memory is shit, so i forget even my own stuff. BUT THAT SOMEONE ELSE HOLDS LINES I'VE WRITTEN IN THEIR MINDS. i might tear up?? anyway ima stop before i embarrass myself. but ty <3 :-D)

1] Terrible OC (In terms of, like, villains. We're being positive today!)

okay, so i'm really shit about remembering to read shit on tumblr and i havent read ao3 fanfic in some time. so my answer here might not be satisfactory.

most of my time the past couple have been on rp, you know? but yall dont know my rp buds. [BUT I ENCOURAGE YALL TO GET INTO RP. IT IS SO FUN WHEN YOU'RE PLAYING AGAINST SOMEONE ELSE!!! I feel it challenges your view of your character - an your own writing - in a way writing fic/an original story solo or playing IF doesn't. the collaborative aspect is fun and i love the planning, but there is so much you cannot plan. you will surprise yourself with what you write and what your characters will do. but that's another post]

BUT! i will say for fanfic oc, @ava-du-mortain Cecilia du Mortain. it's been a while since I've read Ceci so my memory is fuzzy -- or LIA, rather. And I wouldn't call her a villain ... but I wouldn't say she's just ~misunderstood~. There is a darkness to her I find intriguing that I feel echoes her sibling's, and Pap has linger without making her cartoonish but intense instead ... coming to my mind was a snippet she showed me between Nairuz and Lia.

2] Fic(s) you would/have forced someone else to read

again, i am so bad with this fandom! and i havent been on ao3 a minute my brain is tired.

but, off the top of my mind, not to be egotistical but @lalizah's gift to me for the .... i forgot what it's called. but yall can read it HERE!!

And here is my ao3 bookmarks. Don't at me. I know. What is it I know? I just. Know. lol.

3] A fun writer quirk you've noticed (Specific word(s) they repeat, detailed setting description, a lot of adjectives, trope they write really well, etc.)

I really wanna add rp peeps! But hrm. My first thought was @evilbunnyking So, I'll go with that! Love the way with words, the way characters and characters actions are stated/described. I'm such a sucker for that when it isn't just adjectives but essence? does that make sense? no.

i'm tired. lmao

[borealopelta]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

thanks for the tag, @seasidesandstarscapes !! 💖

How many works do you have on AO3? 40 :)

What's your total AO3 word count? 137,805

What fandoms do you write for? my active ones right now are the boys in the boat and gloryhammer, but i consider myself a terror/the north water writer despite barely touching any of my fics in yearsssss. i love boat media what can i say !

Top five fics by kudos? i was something made for god to label fragile (now i'm stuck) - 1149 (OFMD) out of time, eternal heatstroke - 641 (OFMD) sure as the sun come up from the south - 380 (OFMD) steppin' around in a desert of joy - 311 (Ted Lasso) I'm a stitch away from making it (and a scar away from falling apart) - 279 (IT Chapter 2)

Do you respond to comments? yes!!! sometimes uhhh years late but that's only because i forget that i only replied in my head. i think even the smallest comment deserves a thank you :) <- tiny fandom rarepair enjoyer mindset

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? amazing question i could list like 6 immediately with vastly different vibes but i'm gonna pick it always leads to you in my hometown (The Boys in the Boat) because i looove the ending. those men are not having a good time with their emotions and marital status.

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? i HAVE to go with hustling for the good life (never thought i'd meet you here) (Bullet Train) it's one of my fave fics ever and i love the ending so much 🥺🥺 need those guys to be happy (AND ALIVE!) forever and ever

Do you get hate on fics? oh i used to get death threats yeah!! deeply whatever 2 me though i'm writing for me and the 5 freaks who live in my pocket

Do you write smut? less and less lately but yeah :)

Craziest crossover? i don't write crossovers :)

Have you ever had a fic stolen? not that i know of, thankfully!

Have you ever had a fic translated? no, and i'm not sure i'd be into it!! i wouldn't want a translation in a language i don't know because i wouldn't be able to ensure that things are worded the way i want them to be. i've translated my own writing before and i know that's a struggle even when i'm the original writer so you know.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? also no, once again i'm very very controlling about how i want my writing to look and feel and taste. i couldn't write together with someone else without ruining our relationship i think

All time favorite ship i will always always always come back to eddie carr/doc thorne from the second jurassic park novel. they're so crazymaking i'm forever obsessed with them.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? a so far unnamed continuation of call to rise (Gloryhammer) that lives as a long ass outline and several disjointed scenes in my wip folder. i haven't forgotten about her but i have also not made any progress :(

What are your writing strengths? NOT narration/dialogue balance that's for sure!! i'll get so carried away with my beloved descriptions and fun narration that i'll forget to write a single line of dialogue until i'm 600 words in

Thoughts on dialogue in another language? it's one of my big fic icks to be frank 😭 i simply don't think switching back and forth between two different languages does either one justice. the rhythm is different! the vibe is different! it's always always jarring and a lot of times not done well at all. i avoid it when i'm reading and i don't write it

First fandom you wrote in? everyone can judge me for this. it was hollywood undead rpf

Favorite fic you've written? posssssibly let me under your skin (The Terror) i just like the vibe so so much. absolutely miserable depressing yet tender small town armitozer. beloved!!!! but i have so many unpublished ones i absolutely adore, it would be hard to pick. also i didn't feel like linking my other fav fic which is the dead doviest dead dove i've ever written. it fucks though

If you were forced to write only one genre for the rest of your life (like James Patterson lol) what would you want it to be? keeping this makeshift 20th question by seasides because i like it :) my preferred genres would be either period fiction (not specifying when because i want the wiggle room) or nonfiction. i would LOVE to write nonfiction. who's got the time though

i'm gonna tag @duesternis @derry-rain @smolsleepyfox and @zonkutonshorrifyingpeenie if you guys feel like it :))

[meetinginsamarra]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

I've been tagged by @totallysilvergirl and @calaisreno TYSM!!

1. How many works do you have on A03?

51 in total

12 "real" fics and 21 ficlets and 18 covers (I didn't know how to embed on AO3 back then)

2. What's your total A03 word count?

271.977

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Sherlock BBC

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Mutual Attraction , Learn My Scars, The toe that didn´t belong, The embers still glow when I´m sober , Gravity is missing from everything

The last three are in fact a series called Here I Am

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Of course! Always and quickly. I love comments, they make my day and fill me with happiness for hours. Not kidding!

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

None of my fics end angsty. Some of my ficlets might, possibly Time

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

They all end happily.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

There had been a few very weird comments on "Mutual Attraction" that were rude or offensive. Some had been deleted by the cowards who posted them later.

9. Do you write smut?

Yes, I have written porn and enjoyed it. I also write gen and everything in between. Depends on the story.

10. Do you write crossovers?

No, because I define "crossover" as a mix of two existing universes, like Sherlock x Star Trek for example. I have written several AUs though. Alternate Universes with the same characters of my show but placed somewhere else.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have been offered three times but declined because I personally am not comfortable with it.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Johnlock

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have this fairy tale AU sitting in my drafts for literal years. 20k written and several attempts to take it up again, it is mostly plotted but just resists being finished. *sigh*

16. What are your writing strengths?

Learning by doing, I guess? I think of myself that I am versatile. Maybe writing movie-like action scenes. I remember that's been said in comments.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I honestly do not know. (Which is not me saying I can do everything perfectly!! I just try whatever I want.) Finishing the above mentioned fic possibly.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

If it fits the story, why not? I write in English which is not my native language, so I could do German and some French and Italian, too.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Sherlock BBC.

I've actually never written anything before I started with Sherlock fanfic. I got this idea and it grew and I began to write it down just for me so that I would not forget it. Then I thought, why not write it into a fic? I've been reading a lot fanfic already. Over the course of two years (writing on and off) the idea had turned into a 94k fic. I only started posting "Mutual Attraction" when it was completed on AO3.

I still think it's funny because just imagine this. Never wrote a word of fiction before, not even in my native language. Then, first thing I produced is a novel-length fic written directly in English. Still seems surreal to me.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

I love all of my babies and will not choose a fave one. There are only faves in categories.

"Mutual Attraction" was my first and longest fic.

"Wretched and Divine" was the one that made me find my dear friend and beta @peageetibbs

Technically, I am most proud of pulling off "Learn My Scars" because it is 38k written under a huge amount of pressure due to daily posting for Whumptober 2022. Five weeks of intense writing madness but very rewarding, too.

AU and plot-twist wise it would be "The 13th Book ".

---------

So many people have done this but I think @shiplocks-of-love @shelleysprometheus @cumbercurlygirl have not been tagged yet. And anybody else who wants to share, please.

[thesharktanksdriver]

Heya there! I'm the anon that talked about the evolution of stars (but now off anon! because i hate referring to myself as "[Insert identifiable thingy here] anon" if i ever come back to ask something on anon again) and as you've read my. extensive yapping and speculation about a singular mentioned thing you said related to Determination! i have come back to yap and speculate to you once more (Because i may be, waaaay to fixated on this cuz it's my favorite kind of story!)

but you mentioned that 1. y/n doesn't dream often and 2. that they heard in a dream the voices of the long departed cheering them on in and then a star exploding into a supernova. and that made me think about whatever dreamspace they see when they finally have a dream and the entire "Something might emerge from inside of them" thing and i kept thinking and thinking and it kind of gave me a similar vibe to one Chapter of Houseki No Kuni (Really great manga by the way, i recommend it if you haven't read it) specifically chapter 46, Where Phos falls asleep and talks to Lapis in their dream (from page 17 to page 24) and they're in Phos' mind.

now that got my brain running and it's just speculation based on little things but, what if that "something" inside of them has somewhat of some amount of disconnect between itself and y/n? that they can, though in some time limited capacity, talk to them?

And another thing that is related to that train of thought is, how exactly would their "mind space" look, because you mentioned that their memory has issues due to how long they've lived. Maybe it has gaps or holes in it? (In a similar manner to how Phos' mind looks in the previous mention of Houseki No Kuni) or maybe it has blank places in it? or is it just a void? Honestly I've given this, waay to much thought than it should have for throwaway lines.

but with the entire black hole and neutron star thing in mind, would that something alternate between a detachment of everything around them (In a similar way to Kyubey from Madoka) or an unnerving calm monotone depending on what it presents itself while speaking to them before emerging? if it's a different entity from y/n all together that just lives inside of them, that is.

anyways uh if you've read all of this, thanks for tolerating my yapping.

Don’t worry about yapping! I personally love hearing y’all’s input and theories! It’s really fun and motivation on my end! Especially after a shity day lol. Your asks are very much welcome in my inbox!

Btw I fucking adore houseki no kuni, chefs kiss!

And you’re definitely right about that something in y/n eventually being able to talk to them! Y/n and them are “separate” entities but also the same (if that makes any sense). Like, when a character in a show reincarnates. They’re technically the same person but there are differences in their circumstances that change them ever so slightly. Both go by different names and some if the small details are changed but in the overall they are fundamentally the same soul. But back to the topic!

Yes! Eventually y/n will talk with them!

And that becomes important with Marineford.

As for y/n’s mind pace I’d say it’s something akin to floating in space (me and the space themes lol). Bleak darkness that they float through representing their lost memories they waft through, the stars being the lucky few memories glowing in that darkness but so far out, so spaced apart within the sea of darkness that is the gaps in their mind of what had happened and what came first.

Y/n forgets a lot (which they know about but don’t remember what they forgot) and they space out a lot without noticing it at all. Both of these facts kinda make them their own unreliable narrator lol

Teehee now for the most interesting part black hole and neutron star forms.

When in either of these forms it’s y/n that’s in control. The thing in them kinda gives y/n the steering wheel and they watch from the passenger seat cause they’re just there for the ride. But when entering these different states y/n is very fundamentally different.

Both forms have their upsides and downsides, both are extremely powerful but are either self destructive or externally destructive. But most importantly they awaken and depend on y/n in a mental way.

Both are made of stars collapsing, but as one burns on the other decides to take everything with it.

Y/n will collapse but their choice in that mental collapse will determine the outcome of if they awaken either form.

I probably spoiled my own story quite a bit but screw it! I’m writing this shit at a snails pace and I wanna give yall food to eat since I’ve starved you all of content lol

[albonoooo]

1, 9 and 26 for the music asks 🤍

thank you!! <3 i sincerely apologise for taking WEEKS to answer this. i just couldn't think of replies for the first two questions and in the end, i still didn't. i hate my brain lmao

1. what is your favourite song of all time?

charlie. charlie why. i don't know!!!! i'm trying to think of a song that i've never or rarely ever gotten tired of for this, but nothing came to mind quickly or after weeks of thinking about it. i'm very much a "find a song you like and listen to it on repeat until it makes you feel sick, then forget about it for an unspecified period of time" kind of person. my current favourite song is brutus by the buttress, but that'll be old news by november at the very latest.

9. who are your top three all time favourite bands or artists?

another question that is so incredibly difficult, partly because i tend to just focus on what kind of song i like/wanna listen to instead of artists? idk how to explain it. also there is no artist who doesn't have songs that i dislike, they all have some flops for me personally so that's really not helping. if you'd asked me this three years ago, i'd have named slipknot and stray kids, but i haven't listened to or kept up with either of those in ages so nevermind that. anyways, the only band i can confidently name is the arctic monkeys.

26. is there/what is a song that you always associate with a movie or tv show? (i felt bad for not answering the other two questions properly and went on for way too long here as compensation)

weirdly, i don't usually find myself paying a whole lot of attention to the music in films and shows because i have to direct all my limited attention to what's going on lmao. that being said, the obvious answer here is red right hand by nick cave & the bad seeds and peaky blinders. but then again, the song is used in the show so i'm not sure if that counts?? unless i'm understanding the question wrong.

there are a couple of tom schilling & the jazz kids/die andere seite songs that always make me think of napola, more specifically friedrich and albrecht's relationship. most importantly, draußen am see, heller schein and die weide which is also why they're on my napola playlist!

waitin' round to die by townes van zandt always makes me think of sons of anarchy (i'm still salty about this show getting taken off netflix while i was in the middle of season 3), but i think that's mostly because it gives me a similar feeling as house of the rising sun. while we're at it, let me throw paint it black by the rolling stones and hurt by johnny cash (specifically for jax? maybe) into the mix as well, simply based on the overall vibes.

besides all that, pretty much any ac/dc song makes me at least briefly think of supernatural, even though i only ever got to season 2, i think.

(i also have a whole berserk playlist that i made in a hurried frenzy after watching the anime from the 90s lol. not my best work by a long shot, but it's there!)

music ask game

[somethingclevermahogony]

WIP Questionnaire

I was tagged by @elsie-writes and @illarian-rambling so I am responding to both of you here!

Unfortunately I have a ton of deadlines coming up so I might be posting a bit sparsely for a few days. But I would still love it if y'all continued to send asks and tag games so I have some things to respond to when I get back (on top of the things I already have to respond to!) Rules: Answer as many (or as few) questions as you'd like!

The Testaments of the Green Sea

Questions:

What was the first part of your WIP that you created?

My MC, Narul, I believe was the first concrete part of my world that I created. He started out as this sort of vague character, too big and strong for the world around him, struggling with understanding himself and his place in a world that is so divorced from what it is to be someone like him. The awkward gentle giant is a trope that I just happen to really enjoy. From there I started making a world for him to live in, for a while he lived in the Kingdom of Chisheytal, which later became the City-States of Kishetal, and for a little while I played with the idea that the world of Kobani was actually set in the post-apocalyptic aftermath of a superhero world, and that Narul was in some way related to these ancient superheroes. However as the character and the world progressed, that aspect eventually went away. As far as the world itself goes, Kishetal was definitely the first place to get fleshed out and made into a proper setting.

2. If your story was a TV show, what would the intro song be?

Frankly I have no clue. Something acoustic maybe? Something relatively chill. For all the blood and destruction in the story, a lot of it is just about the beauty of the landscape. I think it would have to be something original. But if I had to pick, and this might be a bit of a cheat, all I can think of is the song "The Greatest Adventure" from The Rankin/Bass "Hobbit". I think the themes of Adventure, but also finding purpose in the present and taking chances in your life and the people you love is something that is really central to Narul as a character. When I think of the song, I think of a number of characters like Istek, Penetinos, and The Stranger singing it for Narul and Ninma, sort of as a way to encourage them, to push them forward.

3. Who are your favorite characters you’ve made? Why?

First and foremost of course is Narul. As a bigger, not necessarily conventionally attractive guy who used to (and to some extent still) struggled with socialization and my own sexuality, I feel like I've written a lot of myself into him as a character. Narul is more expressive than me, particularly when it comes to things like grief and frustration, and so I enjoy using him as a way of addressing some of those issues from sort of another medium. Unfortunately I've made the poor fella an anxious wreck.

Istek is the polar opposite to Narul. He is free and happy, and is able to grapple with and fully embrace powerful emotions in a way that I wish I could. His grasp on life and purpose and love, are things that I wish I could emulate. His energy is a lot of fun to write whether as the daring sea captain or as the forgetful old man.

Ninma is fun, just because writing a little bratty child character is a lot of fun. She has next to no filter, and that's just fun to translate into the story.

Zatar and the Deep Sun are up there just because villains are fun to write about. Lots of violence and angst.

4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fanbase for your story?

I'm not entirely sure! I hope there would be overlap with the fan bases for other epic fantasy series, LOTR, Wheel of Time, Etc etc. In some ways I can see a little bit of overlap with Percy Jackson fans if only because of the shared connection/inspiration from ancient mythology. Aside from that I'm not entirely sure, to be honest I'm not all that active in a lot of fan bases so it's hard to say for sure.

5. What has been your biggest struggle with your WIP?

Editing! I make constant typos and I brain dump. Editing is such a slow and boring process and one that is made even worse by the fact that I am currently working on getting a Masters Degree and so much of my time is dedicated to papers and research.

6. Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

There are some, there are a good deal of animals that are unique to my setting. However I wouldn't say that animals are necessarily important to the plot, at least not in the first book. You do see horned-rabbits, Flesh-eating Deer, sea-serpents, birds, livestock, etc etc. There are no pets or anything like that. I don't count spirits with animalistic forms.

7. How do your characters get around?

Walking, boats, and horses. Nothing all that exciting.

8. What part of your WIP are you working on right now?

I am in the process of editing my second draft for book one and I have started on book two. Right now I'm not doing much of anything, finals season doesn't particularly allow for a lot of heavy writing/editing.

9. What aspects of your WIP do you think will draw people in?

I think worldbuilding will certainly be a big part of what draws people in, but I also hope that people will  enjoy the found-family aspect and will be really drawn in by all of the side characters that interact with Narul and Ninma.

And if that fails, there is lots of blood, violence, monsters, adventuring, magic, and queer romance.

What was the first part of your WIP that you created?

If your story was a TV show, what would the intro song be?

Who are your favorite characters you’ve made? Why?

What other pieces of media do you think would share a fanbase for your story?

What has been your biggest struggle with your WIP?

Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

How do your characters get around?

What part of your WIP are you working on right now?

What aspects of your WIP do you think will draw people in?

Tagging @scribble-dee-vee , @patienceofstone , @americanfemcel , @hallowedfury , and @patternwelded-quill as well as any one else that is interested!

[come-away-with-me87]

Love & Angst Chapter 7

Chapter 6 here

Warning: This chapter has a small time jump in it, has implied smut (finally!) and it does briefly talk about death. Note: I actually did lose my younger sister last year, and I'm still in the grieving process. Writing about it was, in a weird way, coping. Thank you for reading <3

******

A few weeks had gone by since that night you and Shouta had kissed for the first time, but both of your fates were sealed after that. You had unofficially claimed each other. You were together every opportunity you could get, which was not very often with both of your busy schedules. When you did see each other, he would mostly come to your house where you two would watch a movie or have dinner together. He hadn't spent the night, yet, but there was a lot of kissing involved. And when you weren't together, you would be glued to your phone, flirtatiously texting away.

He was mostly a quiet and serious man, especially when it came to the education and safety of his students. However, he seemed to relax more when he was around you; smiling and laughing more. That said, you really did admire the way he cared for his students; it made you think of Shoto, and you felt calmness at the fact that he was under the protection of Shouta and the other pro-heroes.

On one evening when he was at your house, you two had a conversation on more of a serious note. You told him about how you had lost your younger sister the year prior, and how that had put a strain on your relationship with the rest of your family. He then talked about the tragic loss of his high school friend, Oboro, and how his death still affected him to this day. He said how that made him treasure the friendships he has now, especially his friendship with Hizashi, who he has also known since his high school years. For the rest of that evening, you two had a solemn conversation until it was time for him to go back to the teachers' dorms at the U.A..

******

One Friday night, you had a shift at the restaurant with Naomi. It was your typical busy Friday night, and thankfully, it went by quickly. After your shift was over, you two sat down at the bar to catch up. "Soooo how are things going with Shouta?" She wasted no time. You replied, "I really like him, Naomi. I know it's only been a few weeks, but I've never felt this way about any other man I've been with. I could see myself falling in love with him." She squealed with joy hearing that, and gave you the biggest bear hug. "You deserve to be happy, Y/N. You're an amazing person with a beautiful heart and soul." You hugged her back and thanked her; she was truly the best friend you've ever had.

While you two sat at the bar, you took the opportunity to ask about her and Hizashi. "Ha ha ha, we just vibe well. It's nothing serious, but he's a goofball and constantly makes me laugh. I'm just gonna see how it goes, ya know?" As it turned out, they made out that night at the bar right on the dance floor, and have been casually seeing each other since that night. "Well, I hope it turns out for the best for you two, I think you're cute together," you said with a smile. She just smiled back, and shook her head, almost as if to say "we'll see."

You and Naomi talked for a little while longer, then left to your respective homes. You were absolutely wiped out when you got home, to the point that you fell asleep on your couch, missing a text from Shouta. You woke up a few hours later in a complete daze, forgetting for a moment where you were. You looked at your phone to check the time; it was 2:00am, and you had also noticed the missed text from Shouta asking if he could see you the following evening. You smiled at your phone, but decided you would respond in the morning since he was probably sleeping right now.

******

It was Saturday evening, and you were getting ready to have Shouta over for dinner. You didn't feel like cooking that night, so you ordered some tempura and sushi for you two from the restaurant down the road. As you were leaving to go pick up the food, Shouta pulled up to your house. You gave him a quick kiss, and told him to head inside and make himself comfortable, and that you would be right back. Even though it had only been a few weeks since you started seeing each other, you trusted him enough to leave him alone in your home with your cats, even if it was only for a few minutes.

When you arrived back home with the food, you walked inside and saw Shouta sitting on the floor; he was using a string toy to play with Annie, while Jareth slept on the couch in complete oblivion. The sight made your heart swell; you instantly thought of a future with Shouta, such as coming home to him after a long day of work. You then blushed, and tried to shake that thought out of your head; it's only been a few weeks, and you two hadn't even made anything "official" yet, let alone think about living together. As if he saw that you were in your head, he asked "is everything okay, Y/N?" You nodded your head and smiled back at him. "Let's eat! I'm starving," you exclaimed.

You two sat down to eat your tempura and sushi; the food was absolutely divine, and you couldn't have asked for better company to enjoy it with. You two talked about how your workweeks went, and how his students were doing. The conversation was light, but nice. After you finished eating, Shouta helped you clean up. You poured two glasses of wine, and you two headed back to your living room to put on a movie. Something shifted in the air that night while you were watching the movie. You felt antsy... but in a good way? You couldn't explain it. Whenever you two watched a movie, you usually sat closely to each other, but didn't snuggle or anything. You wanted to respect his boundaries as he didn't strike you as a touchy-feely man (besides the kissing that usually ended your evenings together).

As you had already noticed, something was different in the air that night. For one, Shouta unexpectedly put his hand on your thigh, and was absentmindedly moving his thumb from side to side on it while the movie was playing. That was new. You couldn't help yourself; you instantly started having dirty thoughts just at his touch. You had not been with a man intimately in over a year, and Shouta's touch was anything but unwelcome. You shyly looked up at him, and noticed that he was watching you as opposed to watching the movie. You two stared into each other's eyes, and in a bold move, you put your hand behind his head and pulled him down to you to give him a sultry kiss.

You two had kissed many times in the weeks you had been seeing each other, but this kiss was different. You decided to be even bolder, and your tongue captured his in the middle of the kiss. What you were not expecting next was him grabbing you by your waist and pulling you onto his lap; you were suddenly straddling him, forgetting all about the movie that as playing in the background. You put your hands around his neck, deepening the kiss. He suddenly pulled away and softly asked, "Y/N, can I touch you?" You felt like you were going to burst at that question, "Shouta...please...yes, touch me."

With that, you started kissing again, your arms wrapped around his neck, while his hands cupped your ass. Since you were in the position of straddling him, you could feel him throbbing and getting hard under you, while you felt yourself getting wetter by the second. You pulled away from the kiss, and breathily asked, "Shouta...would you like to go to my bedroom?" He paused for a moment, "are you sure, Y/N?" Without missing a beat, you said, "yes. I want you. I need you." With that, you got up and grabbed his hand and lead him to your bedroom.

******

To be continued!

[vikings-til-valhalla]

When I was in kindergarten, my music teacher showed the class the famous movie "The Sound of Music". It took several classes to finish it, but I didn't remember anything about it except for one scene where Maria stood on a hill singing that line, "The hills are alive with the sound of music." Everything else became a total blank.

Today, I rewatched it with my mother for the first time in almost 20 years. And all I can say is this:

1. I'm damn surprised a teacher was allowed to show this to kindergarteners.

2. I'm damn mad at myself for not remembering the literal entire point of the movie, which is love and loyalty through love, whether for better or worse.

The horrors of Nazi Germany, and escaping them, it makes me think of what my family had to go through to escape themselves. That's right. I had several family members who, back in the 1940s, fled Germany to avoid being forced into Naziism. They made it onto a boat, and went to Canada, but that's as far as I was ever told. My grandma, old as she was, couldn't remember much more, so she hadn't told any of her kids beyond this.

But it makes me think. My grandma, too, was part of a convent of nuns. She also fell in love and left, married, and had 5 children, although they'd lived in America at the time and continued to do so until this day. Just like Maria fell in love with Georg despite being a nun, and together, as a family, they all fled. Because they loved each other, and they prevailed for the sake of love. It was horrifying, their escape. Traumatic, and full of fear. Fear that, to me, was real. Because somewhere, in the past, my family experienced it firsthand themselves, and were too horrified to tell anyone the whole story.

I remember in 5th grade, a kid in my class had either a grandfather or an uncle (I forget which) who'd escaped a concentration camp. That relative published a book on the experience, came into class, and read it aloud to us, or at least part of it. And... it was just as terrifying to me as when I'd met former slaves who came to my class years beforehand to talk about their experiences as well. It was the 2000s. And yet, these people lived, had stories to tell, experiences to share, and I'm damn lucky I had the opportunity to meet them, hear them out, and learn about history at such a young age specifically from those who'd experienced it themselves.

For years as a kid, I knew Nazis were awful. I felt horrible about being a huge part German growing up because of this. But when I learned my family's story, or what little of it that I know, I started to take pride. Pride in the fact that they actively went against oppression, and gave life to a legacy that continues today where, even though I'm just one person long descended from them, I have experienced all kinds of oppression myself, and met people whose experiences are parallel but distant from my own, and we've stuck together for our lives to fight oppression ourselves.

I've met folks from all walks of life. I've seen everyone who's gone through everything imaginable. I've gone through a lot of stuff myself, things I can barely speak of because they're horrifying to me. And it's because of this that I choose to do whatever it takes to help anyone and everyone find safety, happiness, and freedom.

My distant relatives did the same, and created a family with the hopes that they'd live better lives someday, as everyone who becomes a parent hopes. And thus, I fight for a future of the same desire: make it better for everyone. When you leave, make sure things are better than when you arrived.

Fuck Nazis. Fuck oppression. Fuck supremacy.

Fight for freedom. And, on that note, free Palestine. For the love of everything, free them. This is a more than a massacre, it's a genocide. I've been through massacres myself. This is far worse than that.

Keep taking action, keep protesting, keep fighting, keep flooding politicians with messages, keep donating to Palestinian organizations, keep hearing the voices of Palestinians because they're here and they will tell you what must be done to help them. Do not stop. Ever. The future depends on everyone together fighting for the safety and freedom of one another.

From the river to the sea. Free Palestine.