#I think I'll start writing names down now lmao I'm curious

[radiantcircle-if]

it's september 1! 😩

so i said that i planned to continue trying to write an average of 500 words a day for august, but then i spent the first half of the month feeling depressed because living alone is deceptively difficult 😭 so i gave up having a goal to focus on self-care. thankfully, i'm in a much better headspace 💕

so in august i think i added around 2,000 words story-wise (i didn't keep track in an attempt to not feel so bad about a tiny number 🫣), but i also decided to add a major choice into the first plot beat of chapter one and that set me back a little. i also did some coding and moved my draft from gdocs to scrivener for the corkboard and color coding. in the end, the rest of my writing has mostly been spent on exploring the shared backstory between mc and all the ROs.

definitely the most fun i had this month was answering all of the great asks sent to me. i have a few more asks half-answered in my drafts so uh i guess expect more essays, and once i have those finished, i'll answer the newer asks i've got. thank you for sending them in 🥰

(i'm saving the nsfw asks for after demo release, which i'm planning to be the full first chapter. plan is still fall! but probably late fall.)

for those curious about the change in the chapter, you still arrive home, reunite with your brother, and spend some time with one of your dads, and then that's where there's a shift. i moved the reminiscing for the next plot beat when you arrive at your family's solstice party. instead, i decided to throw in a really fun decision that i won't spoil 🥰

coding-wise, we've got a profile now. also made some more unnecessary design decisions like changing the font and adding more colors. i love vibrant colors, but i know they're annoying lmao i'll definitely include a black/white theme.

here's a preview of what i've got so far, though same caveat as before: any of this design could change between now and the demo. some of it already changed in the last month like twice. i am indecisive as hell when it comes to aesthetics...

(the name on the profile is from a french band called odezenne that i really like if you're looking for a random recommendation.)

plan for september is to go back to writing an average of 500 words a day at least for the first half of the month. unfortunately, i have to work on my dissertation as well and the academic year starts near the end of the month, which means i'll be busy with teaching/grad schooling again. that'll slow me down for sure, so i'm sorry in advance.

ok that's all. until next update 🙃

[northernparkservices]

im curious, what are the canon fpsg ships if any? :3

The biggest one I've got is Clenny (Clyde x Kenny) partially because their superhero ship name would be M&M and I think that's so neat of them. They go from strangers to friends to enemies to friends to lovers and it's so much fun writing and that's all I'll say for now ;)

Gotta shout out the Clyde x Bebe at the start too but their breakup eventually happens and it is so messy in my head lol

I've also thought about Stendy (if not current then for sure past) bc I'm hinting at a little Style in my current wip but idk if it's set in stone yet I'm working it out as I go

Then we got some classic Creek bc I'm a sucker for them lowkey. After a recent event I toyed with the idea of them breaking up down the line but currently I'm thinking "they come back but even stronger!" because Tweek hiding his powers from Craig causes a serious rift between them.

Then there's a few minor ones I'm thinking about like Bebe x Nichole, maybe something in tati (Ike for sure had a crush on everyone at some point), etc etc

As for any others idk yet but again it's a "crossing that bridge when we get there" sorta thing lmao :)

[tideswept]

Oh, oh! Made up title: The Midsummer Incident

This could go either very bad or very harmless in my mind lmao and I haven't decided which instinct would win out so I took my time but--I think I finally have a definitive answer.

And it's... a short story? (wait, wait, stop throwing rotten fruit, it's wasteful! your plants want it!)

"Why do houses bleed?" Morkie—whose name on her birth certificate is Helen Camilla Lynch, but who has a particular set of ideas about whether real names are meant to be used or hidden because she's obsessed with faeries—asks.

I continue buttering the bread. "What do you mean?"

My tone is only curious. No matter their advanced vocabulary, five-year-olds are five-year-olds. Combine that with a fertile imagination, and I'm used to just about anything coming out of my child's mouth. Last week, it had been the deeply philosophical question of whether Santa pays his elves.

(I told her I wasn't sure, and that we could write to him at the end of the year to inquire about his business practices to make sure everything was on the up and up.)

Her attention is on the toast, eagle-eyed that I might screw up the butter-to-bread ratio, which would then throw off the marmalade ratio. "Mr. Barbie's house bled last night."

My head cocks to the side to glance out the kitchen window at the squat house across the street from us. Replicas of Italian statues dot his yard, including an exquisite copy of David that the real estate agent had tried to block with her car when she'd been giving us a house tour, not realizing that my daughter had seen more artistic nudes than most art critics by this point.

Mr. Barbie—Mr. Barberio, but again, due to fairy law, real names were something to be protected—had not been the most pleasant neighbor when we'd moved in late in the spring, but he'd warmed up to us after he discovered I was an artist. Digital, but I had my fondness for charcoal and paper, which had convinced him I wasn't a complete barbarian out to stomp on all things beautiful and true.

He was a spry old man, cagey about his age, with a shock of snow-white hair maintained with the precision of a mathematician's formula, slicked back as if to show off what a full head of it he had.

My husband, who's had a widow's peak since he was Morkie's age, had ruefully rubbed his thinning hair and said, "If you leave me for him, I'll know why."

"Mmn." With a flourish of my wrist to indicate a job well done, I slide the buttered toast onto Morkie's plate. "I can't say saw it happening. What did it look like?"

Morkie takes a bite of her toast and bluntly says, "Like blood."

Alright. Point to the smartass. I pull the closest sketchbook to me—I kept at least one in every room, not out of pragmatism but because I lose them and encounter them again like old friends—and start roughing out the shape of Mr. Barberio's house. "Where? And—hey, no butter fingers."

Morkie looks at her butter-slick hand as if it's betrayed her and pulls it back to hover an inch over the sketch. "Here, and here," she explains, pointing at the two upper windows that face the road.

I dutifully shade in those windows. "Like this?"

"Like crying, mommy." Morkie chomps on her toast, sounding exasperated that I'm not picking up what she's laying down. God, I'm going to miss her when she starts kindergarten in a month. Sassy little beast.

"That's a bit sad, isn't it?" I prod gently, pencil unmoving. The sketch remains as it is, the two windows dark. "Did it make you feel sad?"

Morkie nods. She's finished with the bread and is now dragging her sippy cup to her mouth. She can drink just fine out of a glass; she just likes to vary it up with a classic every once in a while.

"When did you see it?"

"When I was sleeping." Morkie sees no issue with this.

Ah. "Like in a dream?"

"Nope," she says, popping the "p" definitively.

I'm weighing whether to say anything at all because not everything needs an explanation when the sirens, muffled by the closed windows, register.

We live in a quiet neighborhood, deep in a maze of residential streets that simply end rather than looping back into the arteries of the city. So any emergency services hauling ass with all lights on aren't simply passing through; this is their destination.

We watch silently as the ambulance stops in front of Mr. Barberio's house.

📚 [send me a made-up fic title and i’ll tell you what i would write to go with it;]

🍓 [quick jump to ask inbox]

[mysteriouseggsbenedict]

15 questions, 15 mutuals.

Tagged by gert<3 on @trentcrimminallybeautiful

Are you named after anyone? - my IRL name is after a girl who attended the daycare my mom worked at after college. "August" I picked just because I really like it.

When was the last time you cried? - in the last few weeks when I've been having meltdowns about whether I'll be able to move to the city I'm supposed to be starting my masters degree in

Do you have kids? - no lol

Do you use sarcasm a lot?- honestly I don't think I do very often. Occasionally, but it's not a large part of the way I talk.

What's the first you notice about people? - I have no idea lmao I hate this question because I genuinely don't know. Probably just physical appearance and vibe? It's not something interesting like "the way their smile lights up the room" or some shit.

What's your eye colour?- hazel!

Scary movies or happy endings? HAPPY ENDINGS I HATE SCARY.

Any special talents? - if writing counts as special, then writing. I can't curl my tongue or do a handstand or anything.

Where were you born? - washington. guess which one. i'm sure you'll be wrong.

What are your hobbies? - writing, reading in theory but i'm shit at actually sitting down and doing it, going for walks and listening to podcasts, wasting time on tik tok, and i'm trying to get into sewing.

Have you got any pets? - my family has a dog and she's the best and goodest creature in the world

What sports do you play/have you played? - none because I have no athletic ability but I enjoy hiking (if it's not for like 10 miles up a mountain, I do the easier stuff) and walks. I also used to run but then I got asthma! fun! and now it makes me feel like dying!

How tall are you? - 5'7

Favourite subject in school? - English without contest but I also enjoyed Spanish

Dream job? - okay so this is the dream. I'm a librarian. An academic librarian, to be specific, which means i work in a university where I wear tweed and blazers. I do workshops teaching students to use databases and find sources. I work to teach people about information literacy, avoiding misinformation, thinking critically, being curious about topics, etc. I make a sensory-friendly room in the library for the autistic people. I start a queer book club. The students like me and I help make the library a place they come to feel safe. I fistfight ron desantis in the street and I win. In my spare time I research historical fashion, write stuff about it, and live in a cottage by the beach with my qpr wife who is also ace.

Tagging anyone who wants to participate!

[happy-tori-friends]

Hey there, I hope you're doing well! If you're feeling up for the pregnancy prompts, could I request "trying to figure out the baby's gender by analysing their symptoms with old wives' tales" for Flippy and Splendid? You've roped me into this ship and I doubt I'll ever get out haha

Thank you very much in advance!

sure thing! i actually have many a thought about the few 100% happening pregnancies in the discord channel i ramble in (well a thread in said discord channel). i think someone asked about the twins' a while back but yay for supertroopers baby. i have them planned out like i do with the twins' kids but i won't spoil here in the start notes... read on and maybe you'll get a hint about the baby and their name! or not. because i prewrote this before writing it.

hilarious that this got requested while i was writing the last htf chatfic chapter centering around 'mpreg is real' lmao

“What are you looking at, Flip?”

Flippy turned to look at Splendid, a sheepish smile on his face. “I just… I know there isn't really a basis for most of them being true, but I'm looking at old wives tales.”

“Are the twins not interested?” Splendid asked, raising an eyebrow as he looked at the website.

Flippy shook his head. “No, not really. Shifty said it's a waste of time and Lifty said that he'd rather wait until they can tell with the ultrasound. But I'm just a little curious to see if it's different from what we're actually having.”

‘Well, the first one easily says boy. I'm the one that's had the morning sickness mostly, not you…” Poor Splendid had been getting sympathy symptoms, while Flippy was having a more relaxed time. “But you've been craving sweets, so that one would point to a girl…”

“Heartburn… Nope, haven't had that. So, boy,” Flippy hummed. “Little Splendorous seems a bit more likely than little Dazzle right now.”

“First of all, we're not naming a son that, and secondly, we haven't even gotten through half the list, Flip,” Splendid chuckled. “...What's a linea nigra?”

“Um… it says it a line… but I don't think I have one yet…” Flippy stared at his belly as he lifted up his shirt. “Let's put a pin in that one… Hair and nails!”

Splendid ran a hand through Flippy's hair and looked at his hand. “You've had the glow. So boy… And the next is also boy. No acne at all.”

“According to this, it seems like Lifty and Shifty are having girls so far,” Flippy let out a giggle. “Okay, this one's about being clumsy and tired for boy or alert for girl. Finally, another point for girl!”

“And you're carrying wide and high, so add on two more,” Splendid patted the baby bump. “...What about your feet? Swollen?”

“Nope!” Flippy chirped, so that's another girl…”

And so the tides changed. Tale after tale now pointed to a girl.

“...Do you want to do the ones with pee?” Splendid hesitantly asked as they got to a new section.

“Eh…” Flippy shrugged. “I'd rather not have the others walk in on that. I think this is an okay stopping point. But… what do you think? I've been feeling like they're a girl, but who knows if I'm right? These tests were a mixed bag.”

“I also feel like we're having a girl,” Splendid responded, placing his hand on the bump and rubbing. “But I don't really care as long as we have a healthy little one.”

Flippy nodded. “Yeah. Healthy. I don't care if you're Dazzle or Splendorous, as long as you're healthy, little one.”

“I told you we're not naming a son that,” Splendid huffed, pulling on Flippy's cheek, to which the other laughed.

“What about Fliqpy Junior then? I'm dealing with this too.”

Both Flippy and Splendid rolled their eyes. “I don't think so,” the hero shook his head. “I want them to have their own identity, not live in anyone's shadow. Alluding to someone else is fine, but Splendorous is way too close to my name.”

“Bah, better bank on having a girl then if you can't think of a good boy name,” Fliqpy responded, and Flippy simply sighed in response.

“Fliq, you're so dramatic,” he mumbled, shaking his head. He then looked back down at his belly. “We'll come up with a good name for you if you're a boy. And we'll love you no matter what.” He stood up, leaning on his boyfriend. “Let's go snuggle somewhere more comfortable.”

“Of course, of course,” Splendid smiled, leading him to the bedroom. No matter what the world had in store for them and their growing family, they would face it together and with love.

[thegreatimpersonator]

Hello!! I interrupt your scheduled programing with "Kate tells Meg about the book she is reading because she is bored and reading is fun!" time!

Okay - so, I finished the Adventures of Amina Al-Sirafi by Shannon Chakraborty on audio, and wow! I really liked it! I found the writing to be subtle, and the narrators did such a great job with the emotions the book had. The plot was almost like peeling back a layer on something, finding more and more behind the walls. It starts out one way, and then the adventure starts and pulls you along for the ride. The characters were lovable, and it was so nice to read a book that had Middle-aged adults at the helm. They felt real and I rooted for them! Very excited for the next book when it comes out! Highly recommend for audio!

Up next for audio: I am about 25% of the way through Thistlefoot by GennaRose Nethercott! I've picked this book up a couple of times, only to turn around and set it down for whatever reason. This time, second time trying on audio, I managed to push through the part that kept stumping me, and I like it so far! I am interested! I like Bellatine a lot, but still trying to find some connection to Issac. I am curious to see how this will all intertwine with each other because right now it feels like there's a lot trying to happen. However, the setting is dreamy and lush with imagery and fall vibes, so it's doing a great job for healing my heart, as I ache for the cooler weather, spookier vibes, and dreamy colors.

For physical books, I managed to get about 50 pages through Immortal Longings this weekend, and I wish I could find some more time to sit and read because I like it! The setting is gritty, the vibes are mysterious and what can I say, I love a good trial setting. Still getting to know the main characters, but I am rooting for them! Has the classic Chole Gong imagery, but a lot less dense, and I think the New Adult setting for her works well! I think it allows her to actually tell the story she wants to tell without being worried about it being too much for a younger audience. Hope she considers sticking in the genre!

Other fun news, we adopted our new kitten on Monday! He is about 5 months old, black short hair and the sweetest little guy. He's snoozing in his carrier while I work right now :D His name is BMO from Adventure Time! We're still a bit away from introducing him to our older cat Suki (from Avatar the Last Airbender!) but hopes are high and we are so happy :D

Anyways, thanks for tuning in! Back to your scheduled programming with Meg talking about Kendall Roy :D (Long asks for the win!)

OH HELL YEAH it's been a long time coming!! This makes me instantly want to pick up immortal longings, but I need to finish my current read first haha! Lovely to hear about Adventures of Amina al-sarafi, I bet audiobooks add a whole new dimension to the genre (I've heard so much about how yellowface would work best w a narrator, looking forward to try that out) and BMO 🥺 i hope he gets along well with suki, always ALWAYS a pleasure to hear about cats!! Im currently reading siren queen by nghi vo, I guess I'm still chasing the do tell vibes and so far it has been promising so let's see how that fares! A friend also highly recommended Naomi's Room and I think this is the perfect time to delve into horror so maybe I'll check it out soon, Still trying to convince myself to get started w house of leaves but for some reason I keep saving it for later lmao!

[laws-yellow-submarine]

5, 8, 9, 11, 13, 17, 18, 23, 26, 34, 35, 45, 46, 47, 49, 50.

Sorry if that's a lot. I'm just curious. 😊

It's no problem! I just had to go find the questions 😂

5. How do you like your eggs?

I don't like eggs actually 🙈 occasionally I'll get a craving for an omelet, but I need a ton of fillings or I can't eat it lol

8. Do you collect anything? If so, what?

Now that I think about it I don't think I really have any collections? I have a collection of random items that don't go together but I just liked them and wanted to have them lol

9. What sounds or scents calm you down?

Rainfall, thunder, peppermint, lavender. I listen to ASMR at night to help me fall asleep too so basic triggers like tapping and whispering really gets me lol

11. Do you wear glasses or contacts?

Nope! I was somehow blessed with perfect vision (everyone in my family has terrible vision, no clue how this happened, I'll probably just go blind one day lol). My son just had to get glasses though lol

13. Do you prefer to write in pen or pencil?

I like that I can erase pencil but I'm a sucker for a really nice pen so I'm gonna say pen lol

17. What’s the last thing you ordered online?

A really embarrassing item lmfao (well not embarrassing but not the kinda thing you should just blurt out in a regular Q&A lmao)

18. What’s one historical event that you would have liked to have witnessed?

This is a tough one lol I feel like I'd wanna be able to observe a lot of ancient history, the things historians still have questions about when it comes to "Why did they do this?" "What was this built for?" I just want to understand everything lol

23. Which songs do you like to sing in the shower?

All of them lmao I'm pretty partial to musicals, Disney, stuff like that. I'm actually planning to audition for a musical this week (local community theatre) so lately I've been practicing for that!

26. Can you cook or bake? If so, what are some of your specialties?

I enjoy both though I'm still learning to do things from scratch instead of following a box recipe lol I make some really awesome chocolate chip cookies though! (I hate to be cheesy but considering it's literally just the recipe on the back of the bag but people have said multiple times mine are the best they've ever had, the secret ingredient really is love lmao)

34. Can you read analog clocks?

Yup! I've got one in my living room actually. It doesn't even have actual numbers on it lol

35. Describe your favorite stuffed animal, either now or from when you were a kid.

As a kid my dad won me a big purple teddy bear with a biker hat and jacket. I named him Purpley (I was 7 🤷‍♀️). Currently my favorite is a shark pillow I bought 2 weeks ago. I call him Sharky, but his legal name is Ronaldo

45. Do you have good handwriting?

If I focus really hard and write slowly I can make it look kinda nice, but most of the time it's a bit of a mess lol I write with some combination of printing and cursive so it all flows together lol

46. What’s the last thing a friend recommended to you that you looked into and actually liked?

The current (as of 2022) cast recording of Into the Woods! That's the musical I'm auditioning for, and a friend who is also planning to audition sent me a link to the album to give me more to practice with. I really enjoyed listening to it, and I like some of the ways the current class sings a bit better than the original cast. Also had a friend tell me where to find the stage version on YouTube since I had only seen the movie. Definitely prefer the stage version 😂

47. Do you like to go on walks?

With other people, yes! Or if I'm walking to a specific destination! I like being outside I just feel weird about being out alone lol

49. What’s your favorite thing to do when it’s raining?

Sit and read a book, light a candle or some incense, just relax lol just last night we had a storm and I sat out on my balcony with a book (the awning is long enough that no rain got in, but the lightning started getting close so I went back inside lol)

50. Describe your perfect sleeping conditions

Ice cold, fan on, rolled up in a bunch of blankets, rain hitting the window, maybe even having the window open slightly (so long as there's no bugs). Not quite pitch black, but very low light so it's not disturbing. Just enough to keep my eyes from playing tricks on me in the dark lol

[mod2amaryllis]

i had a long convo with jose the other day trying to explain why the thought of making "content" for money has always been so off putting, especially from an influencer perspective, and it boiled down to a metaphor i can't get out of my head.

so my mom's an actress right? this means i grew up understanding the nitty gritty reality of that work, primarily that it is WORK. it's a career that people choose to do. and seeing this work, i actively decided, no thank you i don't want to do song and dance for work.

BUT NOW IT'S LIKE "SONG AND DANCE" IS IN EVERY JOB DESCRIPTION... no matter what people do, it gets posted online, ideally for money. it feels so unfair to me. there's vet med influencers, which i will never do in a million years. if i want to write? song and dance, make a Twitter and a tiktok and try to go viral. if i want to post fish, animals, etc? stop what you're doing to get a shot, say "hey guys" to the camera. I'm not passing judgment on these things, I'm saying i don't personally enjoy them. i actively rejected them!! before social media took over!! i almost went into film before pivoting into vet med, i rejected this already ugh!! on top of that frustration, i don't typically like being a consumer of influencer content, it's not something I'm passionate about, and i HAVE to be passionate about things.

but jose was trying to play gentle devil's advocate (because this was partly a conversation about income, which I'm terrified to ever be without, and i kinda wanted to be convinced) and being like well... it's become such a complicated area of life. "influencer" is not one thing. it's not all "hey guys" and vlogs and appearance-based. not all animal influencers are exploitative (not like family vloggers, he teased, intentionally inciting a mini rant lol).

which brings me back around to fish, and the dude who links these two conversations together for me.

freaking tanner at serpadesign.

i can't think of another creator who's a larger exception to my influencer-dislike...he's such an inspiration...and in every video i'm struck by how closely his ideals align with mine.

here's the thing with fish influencers. this is such a huge hobby that everyone has their niche of things they enjoy about it. there's the breeding side of things (keeping fish simple), the education side (aquarium coop, girl talks fish), the aesthetic scaping side (md fish tanks), the pure entertainment side (fish for thought). all the other creators i've listed there have things i enjoy (particular s/o to keeping fish simple's fish room tours). but none of them are as all-encapsulating and tailor made as serpadesign.

he's an artist, first off, and nature is his medium, but then it's not just the scaping. it's the ANIMALS that are his absolute top priority. they all have names, they all get consideration, they get lifelong updates, they get cared for in the best ways captive animals can. like the love of art and love of animals is embroiled. and he doesn't seem like this uber social charismatic performer type guy, but i LOVE watching him talk about his work, because HE loves it! like.....i can't really explain it but i think anyone else who watches his stuff gets what i'm saying.

what was i even talking about. kind lost th plot, anyway that's all to say my views on creating online are ever changing and idk.....it's something i'm curious about exploring. maybe i'll start with a ko-fi LMAO

the truth is if i could afford to throw it all away and become a fishfluencer i would....

[lostlovesoul11]

[OPEN WIDE ]

[PART 2]

pairing: fuckboy haechan x reader

including best friends: jaemin, jeno and jaehyun x ( ft teacher doyoung)

don't read if underage pls 18+ content

warnings: pure smut, exhibitionist kink, double penetration, orgy, anal sex, overstimulation, voyuerism, orgasm denial, edging, oral sex, blowjobs, cum, breast play, teasing, creampies, teacher, univeristy, classroom, getting caught, needy reader, name calling, sir kink, needy hyuck, jealous fucking, mastermind hyuck, slight sadist, masturbation, slight humiliation, shame, pure filth, desperation, spankings, choking.

word count: 4.6k

[probably is my longest fic I've written, got too carried away lmao, didn't think of doing this but did and ofc had to add my fav doyoung. thank you everyone who have been liking all my posts esp part 1 of this story which received the most notes! by no means I'm no writer or anything of such, I just like reading smut and started writing it for myself randomly until I received likes on my posts lol]

PART 1

[17.28pm] Haechan: ready to get your mouth stretched out again slut?

the message come on to your screen and excitement gushed through you. Its been weeks since you felt so good, yes you've been with other guys at uni but something about haechan and his friends was so so different. you had the fucking time of your life. but there is also something bothering you. you don't normally let guys fuck you, you just let them use your mouth. its a strict policy you have. after having Haechan's request done, you really want to change that. you want them to use your body and every hole of yours too.

[18.02PM] You: I'm ready. When and where?

[18.03PM] Haechan: Meet us in the classroom behind the lecture room, tommrow. At 5pm. Don't be late slut.

[18.04PM] You: okay I'll be there.

you felt quite confused? being used to committing your sexual acts in the guys bathrooms, this is something new. this time you really have no idea what to expect, you're conflicted in the mind yet tempted to see what's in store for you.

the day finally arrives. in each lecture you could barely even concentrate thinking of what is possibly going down later. one of your lectures, your teacher Mr Doyoung even noticed you wasn't being attentive as you normally do. he clears his throat before he speaks.

  "Can you pay attention, this is really important information for your assignment". Mr Doyoung said.

"Sorry sir I will pay attention now" you responded.

"what is wrong with me? you think to yourself. its not like its your first time doing sexual things, however its different with Haechan and his friends. you do not know what to expect especially after his wild request. curious thoughts is all you have now.

finally you finished your lecture. most people had left to go since classes are finished for today. so here you was looking at the time on your phone, exactly 4.55pm. to be honest you felt something tight in your chest. perhaps nervousness. you normally are the one in control on what and where to be, you know what to expect but this time, the very first time you don't have the control. it does make you feel slight anxious, not knowing what to expect. and the thought of being in a classroom where anyone can walk in to does make you feel somewhat nervous. its a first to let others take the lead. you tell yourself its going to be just fine, small breathes. you want this just as badly. You already feel arousal thinking about the last time. there you are, walking towards the lecture. it was empty, no one at sight. you felt relieved and walked your way to the hidden classroom behind. just as you opened the door, you see Haechan sat right on the chair. you felt aroused just by seeing his beautiful face and sexy thighs well spread out.

"5 minutes early huh? Someone is pretty eager to get stuffed with a bunch of cocks"

he walks over to you taking slow and intimidating steps. you dont realise that you've pushed yourself behind a wall. no where else to walk back. stopped at your tracks, you finally made eye contact. Haechan's gaze is so intense, watching you in amusement seeing you look so confused and startled. he leans in closer giving a cold whisper. "You're probably wondering why I choose this place, right?" he said it in a sultry voice. feeling shivers going down your body,  having no idea why you can barely say a word. ever since you came across Haechan, he left a quite different impression. he was intimidating yet nice? he brings his finger on your mouth, you felt desperate being the needy bitch you are and sucked it. He laughed, "you're cute".

but it seems like he had other plans. he brought his fingers down to your chest, circling your hardened nipples then pinching them hard. "Mmmm." slowly trailing his finger further down to your wet panties. "Tsk I've barely even touched you and you're already soaked, slut". you let out small moans. just having him at close proximity to your body, moving his fingers makes you feel so frustrated.

"You think I didn't notice you begging to get your pussy touched that day?". you felt  exposed infront of Haechan, he manages to see right through your acts despite you not trying to show it. the sudden intrusion of his finger inside of your wet pussy makes you gasp so hard, "fuck! you moaned out. He pulled his finger out without warning, leaving you deprived. "Hae-chan please.." you begged. He grabbed on to your hair and pulled it hard. "Answer me slut!". You felt so deprived and wanting him inside badly. "Yes, yes Haechan I..  wanted my pussy touched.. i wanted to feel everyone's cock.. inside of me..". Haechan got his fingers near your folds, teasing you before he shoved them deep inside. "Fuck haechan.. your fingers feels so..good" you immediately started riding his fingers like its a cock, loving the way they feel inside of you. "Be a good slut and make my fingers dirty" he says and you felt yourself coming to climax. His fingers felt like heaven, you couldn't stop moaning out and creating a mess. As he got his fingers out, haechan seductively sucked your wetness off. "Mm taste so sweet my pretty slut".

it was weird to think only Haechan was here. To be honest he created a bigger impression on you. before you entered you had wished to see him first, you know how he makes you feel with his dirty words and gaze. you love how he knows how much of a slut you are. just as that happened, the classroom door opened. Walking inside you see familiar faces, Jaemin, Jaehyun and Jeno.

"Yo haechan why you always first?" Jaemin asks. To be fair even you wondered the same thing too.

"Had the stretch the pussy out before you fuckers get inside it".

"Damn her panties are soaking bad, so eager to feel us inside?" Jeno said.

"Clothes off now" Jaehyun ordered as he pointed at you.

you begin to strip your clothes off after Jaehyun demanded you. Jaemin told you to leave your soaked panties on whilst you removed the bra. the guys were in awe of your body, an hour glass shape with a nice ass and perky tits. instantly you felt all hands touching your body. Every hand made you feel a bolt of electricity in your body, never feeling such exposure of four guys watching you without anything on. making you feel sensations you've never felt before.

Jaemin came from behind and pulled you down to sit on his lap, feeling his hard cock against your ass. as you did, Jaehyun moved his hands to your tits and cupped them in his hands.

"So nice and juicy" immediately noticing how hard your nipples are he took the left breast in his mouth and sucked it off. massaging the right breast before he brings his whole mouth inside of it. "Mmm.." you started to moan. Jaehyun looks so attractive having your tits inside his mouth. The thought of sharing every part of yourself to everyone made you so so wet. "You like when I suck your plump tits don't you?"

"Yes.. Jaehyun I love it..".

when Jeno was approaching closer, you subconsciously spread your legs. "Fucking needy bitch" he said as he moved your panties aside, watching how your pussy is dripping. "Look at this pussy begging to get fucked" Jeno brings himself between your legs, moving his tongue all around your pussy and entrance, swirling his tongue onto your clit. you felt his tongue enter inside of you and penetrate through your pussy. "You like having Jaehyun touch your tits whilst I tongue fuck your pussy, don't you slut?". "Mmm feels so good.. more Jeno".

Haechan tells everyone to stop and get you  on the desk. Jaemin picks you up and places you on the desk. "Please fuck my pussy.." you whined out.

"Go on Jeno, fuck the slut" said Haechan. You was surprised he didn't want to nor did he touch you after what happened. Lowkey missing the feeling of Haechan's touch and wanted to feel him so badly. But ofcourse Haechan had other plans. He just wanted to watch you get used.

Jeno comes near the opening of your pussy and puts his head inside, then his inches until he was all the way in. "Fuck you gasped. Jeno had a huge cock. He began to grind himself on to you. Whilst he was fucking you into you, Jaehyun and Jaemin got their hard cocks out. You had your eyes closed in pleasure not realising that someone took your wrist. Jaemin got your hand on to his cock and made you stroke him. He was masturbating off with your hand. you gripped on to his hard cock and let him use your hand as a guide to pleasure himself. Meanwhile, Jaehyun rubbed his cock, grabbing your hair he pushed his cock inside of your mouth. "Her wet pussy feels so good around my cock, suprised a slut like you has such a tight pussy mm" as Jeno moved his pace faster quickly.

"Fuck you use your mouth so well slut" Jaehyun says bringing his cock out, rubbing it on your wet lips before he enters inside your wet mouth once again. you moaned yourself on his cock as you felt pleasure in all ways. Jeno was fucking you so good, feeling his hard strokes hit you. using your tongue you swirled it all over Jaehyun's cock. "Don't tease me with your tongue slut, im coming inside of your pussy".

you felt so deserpate with your moans as you got every part of you used. Jeno went faster, feeling shivers down your spine as you both moved fast. "Fuck gonna cum inside this dirty pussy of yours" he says, feeling the hot cum drip inside of your pussy.

"Jaehyun you're next to fuck her".

he was so excited to finally get inside of you.

immediately got his cock inside of you and began thrusting. "Fuck such a wet pussy making my cock feel soaked".

you love getting your pussy used by us don't you whore?" You didnt answer him so he thrusted into you harder, making you gasp out loud. "Yes! I love getting my pussy destroyed by everyone's cock..  feels so good".

Jaemin was getting too desperate. He wanted to feel how its like inside of your tight hole. Suddenly you felt yourself get lifted and placed on his lap. This was different, you felt his cock insert inside of your tight ass hole. "Oh my.. god fuck Jaemin!".

"Fuck me, ever had your ass fucked slut?". You nodded no. Jaemin slid his cock inside of your ass, you moaned in pain and pleasure. Holding you by the hips, burying his cock deep inside of your ass. "Lads her ass is the tightest.. fuck she's clenching my cock already". Moving around he changed positions, standing behind you instead,  making your legs spread out. Jaemin spits right inside your ass making it extra wet and pleasureable. You loved feeling Jaemin in your ass, looking back at him with tears begging to feel his cock inside again. "Want to feel your cock... Jaemin please give me".

"Such a needy cockslut, can't get enough of having your pussy fucked that you need my cock inside your ass too".

Jaemin thrusted inside of you from behind, "fucking slut, want me to fuck my cum inside of your tight hole?".

He kept thrusting deeper, seeing you in pain that changed into pleasure because you loved feeling him inside of your ass. Jaehyun made you sit on him instead. "Ride my cock whore wanna see those tits bounce". You start slowly riding but clearly wasn't enough for Jaehyun. "So fucking useless, want me to do all the work you slut". 

Hugging on to your upper body tightly with his arms wrapped around you, he forced his cock inside your pussy. His pace was roughness, you felt sweaty and slightly out of place. "Fuckkkk this.. feels so nice".

"Bitch you like the way I fuck your used pussy like this" feeling Jaemin hit harder strokes into your ass the pleasure of feeling penetrated at the same time was the best feeling you ever had. "She loves it bro, she can't wait for us to make her holes dirty".

"You love having Jaemin fuck your ass while I fuck your dirty pussy up don't you slut".

"Yes love feeling you both inside me, want to be filled".

Jaehyun fastens his pace as he can feel you clench on his cock. You're literally a soaking mess. "Fuck bro I've never seen a slut's pussy so wet" Jeno said. You bring your hand on Jeno's cock desperate to have inside your wrecked mouth.

"Jeno fuck her mouth up".

As he heard that, Jeno entered his huge cock inside of your mouth. Giving it slow strokes, you felt tears coming down your face. It was too overwhelming and overstimulating for you to have 3 cocks at the same time. But you fucking loved it. "Mmmh love feeling my holes fucked up like this.. feels.. too... too.. good"

"Fucking slut having three guys fuck all your holes, so pathetic" Haechan said.

you wanted Haechan to join in too but he was too sick. He thrived off watching you be a pure slut, degraded and used.

you feel the cocks inside of you twitch. "Gonna dirty your asshole with my cum whore", as Jaemin thrusted hard once more and cummed inside of your ass. At the same time, Jaehyun also fucked his cum inside of your wet pussy. the feeling of having cum run down from your ass to your pussy was amazing, feeling used by both.

"You love having mine and Jaemin's cum inside of you, making your holes filled with cum slut".

you couldn't even speak because Jeno was stroking himself inside your mouth. Soon enough you felt him grunt hard and he shot his hot cum inside of your mouth, which you swallowed all up. "Such a dirty girl she is, got all 3 cum in her holes" Jeno said.

"She likes getting used, look at her she's begging to get Haechan to touch her after taking our cocks the slut".

"Little whore still not satisfied is she? After we destroyed each hole of yours with our cum". Jaemin said.

"Did my pretty slut enjoy having all holes filled up"? Haechan held your chin up. Its the first contact he's had with you since.

"Yes.. i loved it.. so so much but..."

"But what?"

"Want to feel you fuck me Haechan" you said in your wrecked up state.

He smirked, then pulled you by the hair. "Really are a cumslut ain't you? Desperate to get touched by me so bad."

just as he spoke, someone tried to open the door. Everyone panicked slightly because who the hell could it be right now?

Haechan scoffed. He felt annoyed because he was just about to have his turn and someone interrupted.

as you looked up, it was none other than your teacher, Mr Doyoung.

"What on earth is going on here?!!'' As he walked in seeing you fucked out with cum everywhere. Feeling suddenly humiliated and caught out.

Mr Doyoung closed the door behind him as he entered the classroom heading towards everyone.

"*readers name* seriously? Aren't you ashamed of yourself doing such acts? The rumours I heard were right then."

"Sir, please.. its not what you think. Im sorry".

"Guys I'm disappointed in you all. Haven't you heard of the saying, "sharing is caring?". Mr Doyoung smirked.

"Woah you nearly scared us Mr Doyoung" Jaemin said. Everyone laughed.

"Ofcourse we can share her, sluts like her just want every cock inside her pussy." Jaehyun said.

Mr Doyoung made his way to your body. He wasted no time and removed his pants. his cock was out, rubbing himself all over your tits. you'd be lying if you said you never found Mr Doyoung attractive. He looked so sexy during your lectures, you can barely focus when he's teaching you. the times where you had a wet dreams about him, having his cock inside. this felt so surreal. no way is it coming true?

"Ever felt a grown cock like this before pretty girl?"

"No.. sir i have not".

"Going to be a good girl and use that slutty mouth of yours to good use".

he pushes his cock into your mouth. loving the way his cock is feeling inside of you. Your warm wet mouth making his cock sloppy. "Fuck those rumours weren't a lie, got a good mouth on you".

Using your hands and giving it fast strokes, teasing the tip of cock with your tongue.

"I bet you always wondered how i would feel inside your mouth, stretching that pretty mouth of yours, right?"

"Mmm yes.. sir always"

"Shit... fucking love when you innocently called me sir during lectures, made me want to bend you over my desk and fuck that little pussy of yours. But little did i know, you're just a massive slut begging to get stuffed".

Before Mr Doyoung was about to cum, he shoved his cock inside of your cum filled pussy. "Is this why you wasn't paying attention in class? Thinking about having everyone's cock buried inside your pussy?" you just kept moaning feeling so much pleasure. "Answer my question" Mr Doyoung said as he gave a hard stroke for not answering his question.

"Yes sir.. was thinking of getting my pussy filled.."

unbelievable he thought. "If you make me cum like a good slut you are, I'll give you an A grade for your assignment". What a tempting offer that was. Obviously you would agree because your a slut after all. "Ofcourse sir I'm doing a good job aren't I? love feeling your cock inside me. Please dirty my pussy with your cum sir...please sir always thought of getting fucked by you".

Mr Doyoung obviously couldn't control it any longer and started moaning. Fuck his moans were just as gorgeous as his face, pleasing to hear. In no time he shot his cum directly inside of your pussy.

"Such a good slut you are, love how your pussy feels filled inside".

Haechan was watching everything play out infront of him. its what he wanted to see and planned for you. to be extremely fucked out of your brains, wrecked and stuffed with everyone's cum. he did feel somewhat jealous, how you was praising Mr Doyoung and others. wanting to give you his final form, he awaited. the mixed feelings inside of him growing, anger, frustrated, needy and jealously raging, he was so aroused. you looked up and saw him approach you. feeling so much emotions at once. Fear. Excitement.

"Missed me?" Haechan said. you nodded so fast, he was finally giving you attention.

He knew you loved his fingers. A bit too much. so he purposely teased you, having his fingers inside and the other is rubbing your bruised clit. "Hae-chan you.. make me feel so good.." you were a moaning mess for him. How easily you was submissive to him. Haechan saw how your legs were beginning to tremble and he quickly stopped and pulled his fingers out of you. "What the fuck Haechan-"

"Haven't you had enough fucking all my friends and Mr Doyoung? "Don't you have any respect for yourself? Shameless slut, wish your parents could see how much of a slut they have raised".

you felt too fucked out of your brains, you just need haechan inside of you right now.

"Please.. Haechan.. need you so badly" you literally sobbed as you spoke. As much as you loved fucking everyone in the room, Haechan was the one who made you feel the most without doing much. You've had a lingering tension with him since the first day. You always wondered how it would feel being wrapped by his beautiful cock.

you was slightly embarrassed having to beg infront of everyone. everyone easily gave into you except Haechan and that mere fact made you want him even more.

so desperate, you kneeled infront of him, perky tits out with your mouth wide open. Haechan couldn't take it anymore, seeing you be so submissive for him wanting him in any way he wants. he brings his cock out and your eyes widen. Its not the first time seeing his cock but its the best one you've seen. a thick grith and beautiful veins appearing. "Please" you quietly whined out. "Please what slut?" Your mouth was salivating just seeing it. "Want to feel you in my mouth". "My horny little slut, I'll let you do what you want if you earn it." He said.

you smiled and started touching up his thighs, then leaving kisses making your way up higher. suddenly feeling his cock on your face, you got your tongue out and swirled the base of his shaft to the tip. as you kept swirling his tip, you closed your mouth and ran it over your wet lips.

"Tsk that's not really earning it slut, seems like you don't want me to be inside of you"

Hearing his response you took his whole thick grith inside of your warm mouth. You pulled his cock out as you kept shoving it deeper inside your mouth.

"That's much better slut"

just as you was continuing to take his length all the way in he stopped you.

"What.. happened, didn't I earn it?" With a confused look to your face.

"Eh you earned somewhat but I guess maybe not enough for me to fuck you"

you was annoyed, still sexually frustrated yet tolerated everything. all you want is to feel him inside of you. being the desperate slut you are, you began to suck your own tits seductively, trying to get him to fuck you. No response. he just watched you like it was pathetic. Its not that he didn't like your huge tits, fuck he loved them. but he wanted to see how much more you'd beg. Being the slut you are, you bent over exposing your plumped ass. getting the saliva from your mouth to your fingers, placing them directly inside of your hole. All whilst watching him. "Please Haechan.. want your fingers in me the most. It feels so much better with yours than any one else's".

"Not gonna lie she looks fucking sexy right now". Jaemin said and began to stroke himself off to you.

"Having four cocks in every hole still aint enough you slut?" Jeno speaks.

"She's our cumdump for a reason, she loved having me inside that pussy" Jaehyun said.

It slightly annoys him hearing everyone comment on their experiences. The way you your pussy was swallowng their cocks inside and taking all their cum because your everyone's little cumdump. Haechan can't resist any longer and walks over to you. He spanked you so hard you whimpered. And he continued spanking you as your ass is bent over. The hurt you feel and can tell your ass is bruised already. Purposely you shake your ass only to receive the biggest spanks. "Fuckk.. you already can feel the pain as he hits you hard. You lost count of the amount of spankings given, feeling mixture of pleasure and pain. Moaning and crying out. Haechan stops it. His fingers stroked you and felt your pussy.

"You're dripping wet slut".

"Please ..Haechan" you say.

"Please fucking what?"

"Please fuck me please" in desperation you say.

"Oh you want me now?" as he cockily says.

"Yes, I want you inside of me"

"I'm already inside of you, slut" as he shoved his fingers into you deeply.

you moaned and sighed, "want more hae-chan.. want your cock inside..me"

"Now you all will be watching how I fuck this needy slut of mine".

as he came forward he touched your nipples, playing with his fingers before he brought them inside his mouth and sucked.

He didn't wait much until he used his hands to cock your pussy up. Without knowing what's coming, he slammed his cock right inside of you. "Hae-chan.. fu-ck..." as he  thrusts almost savagely. You was so loud, a bit too loud. But that's what he wanted. wanted you to scream out his name so others could hear. That you're so desperate to have him than others. Your throat was hurting and struggled slightly to keep at it until you find his hands squeezing your throat, tightly. Finding that so arousing, your pussy literally tightened around his cock. This was far more brutal than others, you knew it was punishment of some sort and to always remember this day. feeling the tears coming down your fucked up face, barely having your eyes opened. He was balls deep inside of your pussy, thrusting in and out. Haechan fucked you like you were a useless toy and you loved it. Feeling used and for others to fuck themselves on. "Look at how tight your pussy is around my cock, so fucking good". You can hear him groaning near you. "Do my friends fuck you better like I do?"

"No.. only you can!". He rams his cock even deep "you seemed to love having them stuff your ass and pussy full of their cum don't you? Loved the way Jaemin streched your tight ass hole out?". The only thing leaving your mouth are whimpers. "Even had a wet dream you said about Mr Doyoung, can he fuck you like this?"

"No.. Haechan.. only you fuck me dumb"

"See, only I know the way to pleasure you properly, had you begging for me even after having 4 cocks inside that dirty pussy of yours, fucking slut" he spat at your face.

"If you wanna act like a slut, then I'll treat you like one".

His hands roaming all over your body, his touch felt so over powering on you. You can almost feel yourself getting off. Just as you thought, haechan's thrusting got even violent. "O... my god... hae-chan...fuck..!" you orgasmed so hard. Feeling quite light headed, he grabbed on to you tightly. You felt overwhelmed by this pleasure.

"Such a hot fucking slut, letting me take you from the ass. Only my cum makes you feel this good, only i know how to use your body, fill you up well, my personal slut".

Hearing his words just overwhelm you even more, making you feel pleasured and satisfied.

by each thrust getting deeper, you hear the way haechan moans out loudly. you love the sound of his moans, pretty like him. your wet pussy immediately clenched around his cock making him release a loud moan. he filled you up nicely, his hot cum shot inside of you making your hole dirty. he pulled his cock out and the remaining cum was dripping down to your thighs and legs.

"Don't bother cleaning it up, want you to go outside and show everyone what a slut you are. Desperate to have my cum on you like a needy bitch"

you looked back and saw everyone was literally getting off to you, cum dripping down their cocks. they watched the way Haechan fucked you so dumb. what a fucking slut you are.

smiling, you felt so satisfied. having not 4 but 5 cocks inside of you. loving the way and how different each felt. you won't lie, Haechan was your favourite, your glad he waited til last because he fucked you stupid. It felt nice to hear how angry he got since you get off those things. It made your pussy even sensitive and throbbing like crazy.

"My pretty slut did well taking all of our cocks inside your tight pussy, making us stretch not only your mouth but dirty pussy wide" Haechan says as he puts his thumb in your mouth as you sucked.

©2022 lostlovesoul11 all rights reserved.

[moviekid826]

sns fic rec II 🤍✨

hiii again!! sharing a few of my fav sns fics again just for fun 😌

(in no particular order) ((pls remember to check out a fic's tags before reading it))

simmer by moonwatcher

Naruto scrubs at his cheek with the palm of his hand, feeling his face flush with the remnants of anger from the day. “He’s not easy to please. Always has to have the last word. Tries to one up me in the subtlest ways, the bastard.” “Oh?” his mother sounds more curious now and Naruto starts to pout. “What are you thinking?” "Just that he sounds a little familiar is all.”

recently read this and it instantly became one of my fav sns fics ever. everything about it was just perfect. slow burn usually makes me impatient, but it was done so lovely in this fic. i could really feel the way they fell in love with each other 🥺 the writing is also absolutely flawless and moonwatcher's Sasuke was so freaking spot on (i'm usually really picky with Sasuke in fics so!!!)

In Any Lifetime by MadeNew

When Sasuke's thirteen, he wakes up crying for a life lived long ago and a boy he's never met. When he's sixteen, he remembers the boy's name. When he's nineteen, he decides it's time to find him.

reincarnation AU my beloved <3 this was sosososo beautiful. "He’ll always choose Naruto, every time. And Naruto has always chosen him, even when it was beyond stupid to do so." ugh, my heart

The Twenty-Third of July by moonlitmantras

Naruto brings Sasuke a gift on his 18th birthday and the Uchiha clan is there to embarrass the shit out of him.

the Uchihas alive and well, do u need another reason to read this fic????

Last Ones Out by hereforwords

Sasuke just stood there, wondering what expression he was making, numb all over with a distant ringing in his ears. It was only when they were pulling away from each other and Hinata turned and met his eye that Sasuke finally remembered himself and looked down, forcing himself to stop standing so stiffly. (Naruto and Hinata start dating. Naruto and Sasuke try and fail to be okay with it.)

this fic 🤧 sasuke's pain was so raw and real, i teared up multiple times. i'm also a sucker for soft!sasuke and he's so soft in this fic <3 it also gave me multiple cavities lmao, such a good read!!

Tea for Two by Unknown_de_Mordor

Sasuke was pronounced a violin prodigy when he was seven, a genius virtuoso when he was twenty. As far as he was concerned, a jazz violinist shouldn’t hold a candle to him, should he? Then why couldn't he stop being obsessed with Uzumaki Naruto?

i love pining <33333 also i tend to prefer canon fics, but sometimes adult sns in a modern universe hits the spot

Armistice by surveycorpsjean

Sasuke is still here. Or maybe; love hasn't passed them yet.

i don't usually read any sns fics set in the Boruto universe, but this one gets a free pass. there's just something about it... i've probably read it like 10 times. it's really so amazing, and there were so many parts that had me legit screaming such as:

"Sasuke’s sharingan spins threateningly, and Naruto thinks of the Uchiha curse. They are burdened to love so intensely, so completely that the loss of it drives them into madness and power. They’re feared for the strength of their obsessions, scoffed at for their clinginess. Naruto must be wrong in the head, because the mere thought of it turns butterflies in his stomach."

spring days by sanguinedawns

Naruto rolls his eyes, knocking his shoulder into Sasuke’s sternum, “You manage fine on days without me.” Sasuke purposely says next, “You hardly know my woes.” “What now?”

i don't think i'll ever be able to make an sns fic rec post without including sanguinedawns, they're my fav sns author for a reason <3 this fic has everything: soft boys, idiots in love, team taka, STUDIO GHIBLI. such a gem!!!!

for more fic recs, u can always message me if you're looking for a specific fic or feel free to check out my sns fic spreadsheet!! it's just a silly spreadsheet compiled of almost every single sns fic i've ever read. i hope u enjoy!!! happy reading 🧚‍♀️

[n1kolaiz]

The Six Realms

Okay, so I was pretty close to giving up on writing analyses but I'm back LMFAO plus I see we're close to 100 followers and I just want to thank you guys for being so very supportive <3

Alright, I'm not sure if anyone's ever written about this, but if an analysis like this exists, please do let me know because I'm kind of curious as to what other people think about this, too!

Remember that time Fukuchi spoke about bringing "about the five signs of an angel's death"?

I read a little bit more about it, and as a minor content warning: this analysis will focus on a few religious aspects (Buddhism + Hinduism). So if I get any of the facts wrong, firstly: I do not mean any disrespect to either religion, and secondly: please do correct me if I interpret anything in the wrong way.

Spoilers for BSD chapter 90 onwards + BEAST!AU under the cut!

So I'll start by talking about the Decay of Angels. As we all know, the members include Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Nikolai Gogol, Sigma, and Bram Stoker, and their leader, Fukuchi Ochi. After Fyodor's arrest, the Decay of Angels came into light with Nikolai murdering four government officials in a week. These murders symbolise the Buddhist cycle of existence, or otherwise known as samsara: the cycle of life, death, and rebirth.

"We are the Decay of Angels—hiding here as terrorists, a 'murder association', five people who will announce the demise of the celestial world."

Nikolai Gogol, chapter 57

Samsara is described to be a concept beyond human understanding. According to Hinduism, samsara is the physical world where every being has its soul trapped into a physical vessel. The Hindus believe that everything has a soul, and due to a soul's attachment to desire, it is forced into a deathless cycle of being born, dying, and reincarnating into a different body. In Buddhism, the ultimate way to break free from this cycle is by obtaining nirvana.

Nirvana is a Sanskrit word for the goal of the Buddhist path: enlightenment or awakening. In Pali, the language of some of the earliest Buddhist texts, the word is nibbana; in both languages it means "extinction" (like a lamp or flame) or "cessation." It refers to the extinction of greed, ill will, and delusion in the mind, the three poisons that perpetuate suffering. Nirvana is what the Buddha achieved on the night of his enlightenment: he became completely free from the three poisons. Everything he taught for the rest of his life was aimed at helping others to arrive at that same freedom.

- TRICYCLE'S definition of nirvana

As Fukuchi mentions in the panel above, there are six different realms of existence. These realms represent every possible state of existence, but one cannot live in a specific realm forever. Depending on whether or not one's past actions were morally good or bad, an individual is born into one of these realms. Basically, the controlling factor of which realm a person is born into is dependent on their respective karma. The realms are separated into two categories: the hellish ones and the heavenly ones.

The Deva Realm: where beings are rewarded for the good deeds they have done. This realm is void of anything unpleasant. It is basically paradise— empty of unfulfilled desires, any form of suffering, and fears of every kind. Religious individuals, however, do not seek to be born into this realm since its attitude is more or less carefree.

The Asura Realm: where demigods are admitted. Asuras are driven by greed and envy, and may come in conflict with human beings since they are quite similar. They are powerful beings, but quarrel with each other quite a bit, making this realm quite undesirable to be reborn into.

The Animal Realm: where beings are given the form of an animal (you probably guessed that lol). Individuals here don't actually have good karma to take pride in, but rather, they are born into this realm to work off their bad karma (by being slaughtered, hunted, or forced to work, etc). Being born into this realm forces one to atone for their past sins by living out their life as an animal.

The Hell Realm: where one is punished for their evil actions. The most merciless of realms, where one pays for their transgressions through pure suffering, methods of which include: dismemberment, starvation, and psychological/physical torture. However, once a person's term is fulfilled in this realm, they are presumably promised to be reborn into a higher state.

The Preta Realm: similar to the hell realm, in which beings pay for their past sins (specifically: greed and stinginess) by having to survive through hunger and thirst. This realm is also known as the 'ghost realm,' because some pretas are psychologically tortured by being forced to live in places their past selves have lived in. They are invisible to human beings living at that time, which pushes them to face the depths of despair and loneliness. Your typical horror movie, really.

The Human Realm: the only realm where one's actions determine their future. The status (social ranking, physical wellbeing, and so on) of a human being in this realm is determined by their past actions, but due to the fact that a person has their own conscience to differentiate good morals from bad, the actions they commit in this realm have the power to determine which realm they are sent to next.

Okay, so now that I've got that out of the way, let's shift our focus to the Book. Very little is known about the Book, but the basic fundamentals of how it works is that whatever is written in the book will come into existence only if its contents follow the rules of karma. In addition to that, only a few sentences can be written into a single page of the Book, and it must follow the current narrative of the story.

If I'm not wrong, the first time the Book was mentioned was by Fitzgerald, who wanted it to resurrect his deceased daughter in hopes of restoring his wife's mental health. The next time the Book is brought up is when Fyodor's intentions to possess it are divulged; his goal was to decimate the global population of ability-users. And now, the current arc has the Book as its central focus, with a single page in Fukuchi's possession.

[ BEAST!AU spoilers ]

The Book acts as the central point of multiverses, with each character's lives differing from universe to universe.

Dazai committing suicide in this alternate universe stands in sharp contrast with how he decided to start up a new life in the main universe.

Oda staying alive to act as a mentor to Akutagawa in the ADA differs from how Oda uses his death to prompt Dazai to "be on the side that saves people."

And of course, the way Atsushi and Akutagawa have their positions switched in the two universes depicts how different their lives would be if they were given the chance to be mentored by different people— these are just a few examples of how the Book houses an endless amount of possibilities.

[ end of BEAST!AU spoilers ]

Hypothetically speaking, this kind of reminds me of the differing realms I mentioned before, where suffering is promised in some realms, and better things are granted in the rest, depending on one's karma, or the deeds they've done in their past lives. In this scenario, perhaps one's past life can be understood as one's current life in a different universe. That's just a personal opinion though. Take it as you will.

side note: Keep in mind that the person who is more or less impervious to the Book's effect is Dazai, with his nullification ability. I wouldn't want to propose any theories in this aspect (I don't believe I'm fully fact-checked ;_;), but I could use Dazai as a raw example of how your choices affect your future. If Dazai had decided to stay in the Port Mafia after Oda's death, or if he even decided to go through with his suicidal fixations, life would've been different for him in the root universe (obviously, ryley) I mean, you could basically understand that from how he ended up in the BEAST au, but imagine if he really did slip up in his decision-making in any of the universes.

Many analysts have proposed that he went MIA (early in his life) from the main universe for a while to figure out how the BEAST universe worked, whilst having the Book to his advantage. Perhaps his actions were guided? I'm not saying he's all-knowing, but he's sure as hell smart. I'm not sure if Kafka was trying to highlight the concept of karma when it comes to Dazai, but if he is, then I suppose you could say that Dazai is pretty much unaffected by the rules of karma, existing as the centerpiece of all the multiverses. No Longer Human is the namesake of his ability, but the book talks about disqualification from societal norms and generally, the world. I was talking about it with a friend, and they reminded me that Yozo (the main protagonist) was pretty strong in his views against society. Like he didn't speak out of total defeat, he spoke out of defense. If there was anything Dazai actually lost to, it was his guilt— "Living itself is a source of sin."

Then again, that's my personal interpretation since everyone has their unique perspective of his writings. In terms of the actual adaptation, you could translate the word 'disqualification' to 'insusceptibilty' when if it came to the Book's effects on Dazai? This side note is becoming really long lmao anyways I'll link a few theories which afflicted me with brainrot down below.

Another thing before I wrap up, the name 'Decay of Angels' stemmed from Yukio Mishima's book entitled 'The Decay of An Angel.' This is the final novel to the author's tetralogy: 'The Sea of Fertility.' The main protagonist, Honda, meets a person he believes to be a reincarnation of his friend, Kiyoaki, who takes the form of a young teenage boy named Tōru. The last novel of this series enhances Mishima's dominant themes of the series as a whole:

the decay of courtly tradition in Japan

the essence and value of Buddhist philosophy and aesthetics

Mishima’s apocalyptic vision of the modern era

Again, this could be referred to what Fukuchi goes on to say:

Some people view the concept of samsara optimistically, justifying it by saying that perhaps each individual is given a second (third, fourth, fifth, who knows) chance to refine their actions in order to be birthed into a better realm, with their karma being the independent variable.

On the other hand, other people, specifically the Hindus, view the cycle of existence as some sort of plague. To them, the flow of life and being forced to endure the suffering of mere existence in any form was somewhat frowned down upon. Some Hindus viewed samsara as a trap. Besides, having one's soul being limited to a physical body for the rest of eternity was not very appealing, especially since where they ended up at depended on the karmic value their past actions surmounted.

Even so, particular types of Buddhists don't seek nirvana, but instead, like the Hindus, they make an effort to be good people of society, building up their good deeds to increase the likelihood of being reborn into one of the better realms.

As mentioned before, the Deva Realm was the home of angels, the most carefree, gratified beings to exist. Fukuchi describes these angels as the people who don't get their hands dirty, the people who act as the puppeteers of society: politicians.

In terms of parallels, angels were the most fortunate and powerful, but they didn't have anyone ruling over them. A lack of supervision would lead to the abuse of power, which is what I believe Fukuchi was referring to. Deeming himself the Decay of Angels, he sought to prove himself as the 'sign of death that falls on the nation's greed.'

A few fun facts (okay, not really) about Yukio Mishima: he committed seppuku (ritual suicide by disembowelment) on the day he held a speech to voice out his unpopular political beliefs to the public. Mishima deeply treasured traditions and opposed the modern mindset the nation was advancing forward to adapt eventually. In his last book, The Decay of an Angel, he spoke about the five signs which complete the death of an angel:

Here are the five greater signs: the once-immaculate robes are soiled, the flowers in the flowery crown fade and fall, sweat pours from the armpits, a fetid stench envelops the body, the angel is no longer happy in its proper place.

The Decay of an Angel, p.53

The reviews about this series I've read so far describe Mishima's works to be quite complex; his writings demanded a lot of time to deconstruct and understand. They were highly symbolic, and he was pretty obsessed with death and the 'spiritual barrenness of the modern world.' I think you could attach a few strings from here to the mindsets of the DOA members. Of course, this parallel is completely abstract, but I'll go on rambling anyway:

He should have armed them with the foreknowledge that would keep them from flinging themselves after their destinies, take away their wings, keep them from soaring, make them march in step with the crowd. The world does not approve of flying. Wings are dangerous weapons. They invite self-destruction before they can be used. If he had brought Isao to terms with the fools, then he could have pretended that he knew nothing of wings.

The Decay of an Angel, p.113

I suppose you could resonate Nikolai with that excerpt. As much as Fukuchi takes the lead in this whole murder association, I'd like to believe that each member of the DOA plays an equally interesting part in whatever movement they're trying to execute. Fyodor feels it is his god-sent purpose to cleanse the world of its sins, his motto being, "Let the hand of God guide you." Sigma doesn't know where he belongs, since his origination comes from a page in the Book, and is fueled by the desperation to find a reason to live. Bram holds one of the most powerful abilities which is counted to be one of the "Top Ten Calamities to Destroy the World."

What I mean to say is that the DOA members are incredibly powerful, and they're not your ordinary antagonists (or I'm just biased). It's not just overthrowing authorities, mass genocide, and world domination— you could say that each individual is trying to utilize their purposes to their fullest expenditures, and the way they're trying to assert their plan into action is a little more passive-aggressive (framing the Agency, having a convo with a suicidal dude in jail, etc). They're the gray area between evil and good. As they framed the good guys for their own crimes, they're trying to conquer the bad guys for exploiting the innocent as they please.

This post would definitely age well if all hell breaks loose in the current arc (as if it didn't) and Kafka doesn't give us a happy ending.

That's all I have to say for now I guess! Thank you for reading, and once again, if anyone else something they wanna share, feel free to do so <3

sources (tryna follow Q's example ^_^) :

the six realms

samsara

the decay of angels

beast!au

the book

the sea of fertility

yukio mishima

theory: dazai’s emotional/mental state in beast!au

q’s theory: dazai being the protector of the book

theory: beast!dazai and the book

[concerningwolves]

Hiii *excited wave* pumpkin and ghost for the ask game ^^.

🎃Pumpkin: do you have any favorite brainstorming techniques? how do you like to gather ideas for your wip?

For brainstorming, I use stream-of-consciousness writing, usually by hand. Simply rambling on and then sticking post-it notes over the page if I get a new idea while I'm still jotting down the previous one. Sometimes I do spider diagrams, but I'm such a perfectionist that I get sad if I don't do those neatly, which is ... not exactly conducive to successful brainstorming lmao

I'm not quite sure to answer the second part of the question bc I don't think I do actively "gather" ideas? Things sort of float around in my brain after getting shaken loose when brainstorming, and I'll make a note of them. But then, my brain is a near-constant hive of bees buzzing "what if what if what if what if" so that's kind of the easy part.

👻 ghost: can you tease some wip ideas that have been haunting you/something you want to write in the future?

Already answered this here. But! To celebrate being home and having access to all my drafts again, here's a little snippet from a potential prologue of the mentioned WIP:

A shadow appeared beyond the glass, then the door swung open. The young man who entered couldn't have been older than his late twenties. He was a fop, Tarna decided at once. Every inch of him was pressed and smart and designer, from the heavy boots to the pale blue shirt with its top buttons artfully undone, to the red silk scarf looped carelessly around his neck. Probably someone's rich kid who'd decided to stick their nose or some other appendage where it shouldn't have gone, and was now here to throw money at her to make the problem go away. Sighing wearily, Tarna lifted her gaze to assess his face – and froze. He was older than the photographs she'd seen. Thinner, too, with an angular cast to his features that made him look a little haunted. It didn't help that he'd cut his dark blond hair short, and had it slicked severely back. Now, Tarna felt afraid. She started to rise to her feet, suddenly certain why he was here. He didn't seem armed, but if this boy had even half his older brother's wits and tenacity, he probably wouldn't need one. "My name is Doctor Markus Stone," Markus said smoothly, apparently unaware of her momentary panic, "and you're going to help me get into the army so I can find out what they did to my brother." And then he fixed her with a warm, easy smile that wiped all the shadows from his face. Bright depths below, Kurt had never smiled like that. All familial resemblance vanished when Markus smiled, and he looked a lot more like the wavy-haired, grinning boy from the photograph that Kurt had kept inside his boot. And yet. There was something beneath that smile that made all of Tarna's instincts prickle. "If you want to join the army," Tarna said, careful to keep her voice measured, "then you'll want to leave this building, get a tram along to Astervale Square, and speak to the people at the Recruitment Office." "Tried that, didn't work out." Markus pulled out the chair where patients should have sat and seated himself, leaning forwards with his elbows on the desk. He took a sheaf of papers from his satchel and slid them across to her. Curious despite herself, Tarna picked them up. The file had the pale green of medical documentation, with Markus' name, date of birth, profession and area code printed on the front. Inside, Tarna found a Declaration of Fitness form with a grey 'X' stamped across most of the page. A section had also been highlighted in yellow, explaining that Markus Stone, while well-qualified to be an army doctor and having passed the necessary physical tests, was medically unfit due to chronic severe migraines. "I … really don't see what you think I can do about this." Tarna rubbed her forehead. "You're pioneering a new drug, right?" "It's experimental. It's not even been approved for human trials yet. It—" She stopped. Recalibrated. Realised that she'd started to engage with Markus as if this was a reasonable idea, and not something that would get her license blown to smithereens. "...is not something anyone should know about." Markus met her eyes. They really were quite intensely hazel, and Tarna felt like it was Kurt staring at her from beyond the pyre. "I know a fair few things I shouldn't, Doctor Stern." He sounded very tired now, and very sombre, and Tarna remembered again that Kurt was dead. "Very well," Tarna said warily. "Then you'd best tell me what you think I can do to help."

[uwuch9n]

hey person !! today i'll be writing some 2AM sugawara fluff because i'm bored and not tired :D hope u enjoy reading !

characters: sugawara & nb y/n (self insert or oc)

warnings or possible triggers: hands are touched, making out, neck being grabbed (not aggressively!!,) suga and y/n both tear up, goosebumps, a confession, & hugging ! please do not continue reading if any of these things could trigger any unwanted reactions ! maybe the next time i write some fluff or sfw fanfics you’ll be able to read ‘em !

picnic date after practice.

you watch sugawara, asahi, and daichi all laughing and messing around after practice, while kageyama and hinata do their gay little thing. you've been watching them play for the longest time, cheering them on in the crowd, and now that you're in the official karasuno volleyball team, you can't even believe how pretty sugawara actually is up close. or how good they cooperate in the team, that too. sugawara caught your attention the most though, and you knew exactly what it was. his beautiful smile and his soothing voice. though he's never actually talked to you as anything more than a teammate, you felt as though he was just.. special.

of all the boys in the volleyball team, or even in the entirety of karasuno, sugawara was the one you really would like to know the most.

that's when you finally snap out of your little fantasy world and realize that THE sugawara is walking up to you with the biggest smile. you start to tense up, obviously. you've been crushing on him since when..? ever since you saw him? yeah.

"hey there y/n ! i got a question for you, if you don't mind taking a few minutes to talk!" he says enthusiastically. woah. sugawara knows your name and wants to talk to you. SUGAWARA. WANTS. TO. TALK. TO. YOU. and he knows your name.

"wh- yeah sure i've got all day! what's up?" you say acting like this was totally cool with you and you totally weren't just thinking about him. his smile doesn't leave his face, in fact it only grows bigger. he seemed glad that you were free all day. you just didn't know why he was so happy about it.

"awesome ! well i was trying to reach you yesterday but i guess you aren't the type to pick up random numbers are you," he giggled, "i should've messaged you instead... but anyway! i wanted to talk to you about your blocking.. it's really impressive. and i just wanted to say that for a new addition to our team, you really are very skilled. and im so proud of you for that y/n! but im getting off track here aren't i.." he rambled on and on about how impressed he was by you and how he wanted to get to know you better. you sat there flustered and shocked, but still willing to listen to every compliment he threw at you.

his rambling continued and you are able to understand all of it, but then you hear him ask you... a very WATTPAD-ESQUE question.

"i was wondering if maybe you wanted to go on a little picnic date with me so that we could talk about the team.. or if you'd like, talk about each other! whatever you want, i'll make sure to make it happen and-" you cut him off. "MHM! let's totally do it!! i'm so down !! SO PUMPED !! woohOOO! i would love that !!" you blabber out excitedly.

"awe great! when would you like to go? like in a few minutes?? maybe tomorrow? i mean we could go get dressed at home and then bring all the supplies and stuff and meet up at a park if you're fine with it! i'll send you the address of my favorite park.. here lemme just..."he proposed while reaching for his phone. you nod in agreement and both of you exchange numbers, giving each other nicknames in the contact list.

fast forward; you two are already at the park, setting up the picnic spot. (i know im lazy im sorryy)

"alright doll, would you mind bringing over the food basket i set up for us? it's right- yeah right there!" he giggled as you quickly pointed at where it was while he was mid-sentence. he brushed off any unnecessary leaves and dirt on the picnic blanket, and sat down, moving around the food items and snacks to make the setup look cuter and more enjoyable. you finally finish bringing over all the snacks you brought from home and set them down, organizing them alongside suga.

"is that a separate bowl of konpeitō??!" you ask shocked. it was your personal favorite candy and you were curious to know how HE knew that. "yeah it is! i love konpeitō a lot so i brought some for us to share, it's my favorite candy." he replied while scratching his head. "no way! it's my favorite candy too! that's cool!!" you say very hyped. you both giggle and talk about how you two were feeling. things like "how was your week?" and "did you enjoy practice?" were probably the first few questions of the bunch.

of course, the conversation didn't stay dry, and you two talk about lots of things, ranging from why your favorite song was actually a meme song to why sugawara doesn't like to share his snacks with daichi because he eats them all.

you both enjoyed the delicious konpeitō, nommed on some homemade suga-sandwiches, and sipped on fruit punch flavored juice happily while talking about how cute the ducks at the park were.

then sugawara's curiosity kicked in.

"hey doll, i think you already know what i saved you as in my phone, but i never found out what you saved me as.. is it alright if you tell me?" he asked suddenly. he was itching to know what you decided to call him. this was very important to sugawara and you could tell, so you quickly followed up. "i got you saved as suga-bear with a white heart next to it!" you said, smiling gently. he blushed a bit from how calm you said it. your smile made his mind go blank.

"that's.. adorable y/n.. that's so cute..." he lets out after finally finding out how to breathe again. you look away, clearly blushing because of how cute he looked while saying that. he finally mustered up the courage to caress your soft tender hand, squeezing it, not too tightly, and then slowly redirecting his hand to your warm, rosy cheek.

"y/n, honestly.. if i didn't ask you on this date would i have even known how incredibly cute you actually were?" he said as he looked deeply into your eyes, getting lost in them by each passing second. your thoughts raced as his warm hand rested against your left cheek and the wind slowly hit your back. you could hear your heart beating much faster than before. it was a very tense yet relaxing moment.

before you could even respond to his rhetorical question, he leaned in and slowly kissed your lips, his tongue accidentally slipping in. neither of you regretted it though. you kissed back; and for a short moment, your mind went blank. you could feel both his hands moving towards your neck and shoulders. he grabbed your neck gently and only fell into a deeper kiss than when his lips first met yours. his fingers wrapped around your neck and even just the feeling of it gave you goosebumps.

"i don't know if it's too soon to even say this but it's just... it feels right to." he says as he pulled away from the kiss. "doll..." he sighed. "i love you.. and im not holding back from saying that because i know that if we spend even just one more minute together i'll already want to give you the world and all of the universes on a silver platter." he confessed.

you couldn't even believe what was happening. i mean, the kiss alone was enough to make you pass out and yet here you were listening to your crush of 3 years confess his love to you at a cute picnic date.

"i... i love you a lot. im not just saying that because we're here on a little picnic date and i'm not saying it with hopes to make you feel better or give you false hope. i truly feel like you just.. make me feel even more comfortable being myself. even if it was just a short picnic date, even if we played together once or twice during practice, even if this is our first time actually having a full-on conversation. i really do love you... so so much.." you could see a tear rolling down his cheek as he mouthed "thank you" and kissed your cheek.

he went in for a hug and moved his hands and arms up and down against your back. he laughed off his tears while still rubbing your back, and pulled away to wipe his tears. you could tell he wasn't joking about it and that made you get a little emotional too. he grabbed your face and kissed your forehead, then your nose, and lastly, a small peck on the lips.

"suga... i didn't know you felt the same way i did.." you said, reassuring him that you loved him just as much. he laughed through his tears and then sniffed. you could see how he was quickly getting much more comfortable with you.

"i always have... it's just now i'm able to actually tell you about it.. yknow?" he laughed. he intertwined his fingers with yours and tightly held your hands, putting them both close to his face and gently planting kisses on them. both of you looked into each other's eyes and leaned in for a final kiss while the sun was setting.

from the second you saw him, to the moment you two kissed, you knew suga was the one.

that’s all ! i hope you enjoyed this self insert x suga fluff fanfic ! i can't even tell if this one's good or not, but that's because i wrote this at like 2AM and i'm just posting it now because of the lil mistakes lmao. i dont rlly expect this to do any good, just a random fluff i wrote :,)

[lvnatiq]

Cheers to the mess pt.1 |

Nicky Valentino x Reader

a/n: Hello, my love. So this was based on the idea of Jealous!Nicky Valentino. Let me know if you have any suggestions or questions about anything concerning my writing or Nicholas Valentino because my heart, soul and ass belongs to him truly. By the way, I proofread for the first time so make a wish while you’re at it lmao.

-Italic phrases in quotation marks are indicating readers inner monologue, meanwhile, words in italic are used to emphasize the meaning of the word itself-

warnings: usage of inappropriate language, slight angst.

The night is still young, the speakeasy is filled with the late-night conversations of people with humorous expressions and the delightful sound of the jazz music. You, on the other hand, curiously explored your surroundings as the sweet and sour taste of your booze lingered on the tip of your tongue. You asked Ralph to let you have some time with yourself while you were waiting for Nicky to come. You two spoke on the phone, arranging your rendez-vous, approximately two hours ago. Now, there you were sitting at a casual table in the speakeasy for an hour waiting for your sweetheart. Worried that something might've happened to him.

"Where is he? I hope the meeting didn't take a turn for the worst."

You thought to yourself as you tapped your fingers against the wooden material of the table, letting your anxiety get the best of you. Your eyes focused on the entrance gate of the speakeasy, wishing for him to stroll in at that moment. Today seemed like it wasn't your lucky day as your wishes are not being granted. The feeling of loneliness soon turned to utter boredom. The more bored you got, the more attractive the thought of losing yourself at the bar became.

"If I am about to let my stress romance it's way into giving me a nervous breakdown, at least I should get it a nice drink. It would be rude of me not to."

Your desire for a Manhattan led you to take a couple of steps towards the bar. Settling down on the stool, you slowly took off your gloves. The feeling of warmth left your fingertips, the cold surface of the glass table taking its place. The bartender took his shaker as he made his way towards your spot. You opened your mouth, eager to spill the magical name of your remedy.

"A Manhattan-"

"A Singapore Sling for the lady."

Your words were cut short by the silhouette of a stranger located behind your stool. This moment felt too familiar for your liking, almost like a Deja Vu. You slowly turned your head towards the unknown figure as they casually sat down beside you.

"Very rude of me to not introduce myself."

He said, extending his hand in your direction. The bartender's eyes followed the young man's gesture, holding an unreadable expression. You could feel the unusual tension in the air, nevertheless, you remained unbothered. Looking at his hand and then meeting his gaze, you extended your hand for a handshake. Your attempt went unnoticed as he gently turned your hand placing his lips on top of it.

"Matteo Bianchi."

The moment Matteo said his name, the bartender dropped his shaker, practically spilling whatever was inside of it. Shaken by the sound you averted your gaze to the bartender. His hands were shaking, hurriedly trying to clean up the mess he created. He glanced at you, his eyes had panic written all over them as if he was trying to tell you to be cautious, making you even more curious.

Unaffected by his gesture you slowly pulled your hand back as you directed your gaze back to the drink menu.

"Pleasure to meet you, Matteo."

You said, paying him no attention what so ever. Matteo laughed under his breath as he studied your figure. Your drink came into sight, you were still upset at not having your Manhattan.

"Where are you, Nicholas ?"

"I'm impressed that I managed to choose a drink that suited your aura well, miss...?"

You didn't want to give him your name but the reaction that the bartender gave at his name made you reevaluate your choices. Not wanting to cause trouble to anyone including yourself you took a sip from your drink as you responded.

"(y/n)."

You paused as you turned to him, letting your curiosity do the talking.

"How come this drink suits my aura well, Mr. Bianchi ?"

He smiled as he lifted his drink pointing it at your way.

"You seem like a bittersweet woman. Just like the drink."

You laughed, entertained by his way of using words, you decided to let yourself loose by following his game. Observing his looks for the first time, you realized that he was quite charming. His face reminded you of Paul Newman.

You let your thoughts wander as two women with enchanting appearances passed by greeting Matteo with flirtatious looks, giving you a death stare on the side.

"Alright, you seem pretty involved with bittersweet women."

Matteo laughed throwing his head back.

"Enough about bittersweet women-"

"Oh, so you want me out of here? Because I'll make it happen."

Your attempts at escaping failed as he caught you by your waist. Making you feel inevitably uncomfortable.

"Matteo, please-"

"Hands off."

The voice of the man you craved for the entire day has finally appeared. Nicky's harsh tone made Matteo take a step back. Then Matteo opened his arms wide, followed by his sarcastic tone.

"Man of the hour, Nicholas Valentino to whom do I owe the pleasure?"

Nicky placed his hand at the small of your back as he pulled you closer to him. His grip on you was tight, making you feel safer than before.

"I thought that we were supposed to meet next week."

Nicky said his eyes burning through Matteo's skull, filled with enough rage to kill him right on the spot.

"I need to settle it now, I have a meeting with Romano tomorrow. You don't want him to get the deal do you?"

Matteo said unconcernedly. You could hear Nicky curse under his breath. You placed your hand on his giving it a squeeze, trying to reassure him.

"Alright then, let's get this over with."

Nicky let his hand loose as he started to walk to the booth alongside Matteo. Appalled by his behavior, you started to follow their steps. They sat down and you moved to sit beside Nicky. Noticing that you followed them Nicky turned to you lowering himself as he whispered in your ear.

"Toots, would you mind giving us some space while you treat yourself at the bar?"

You looked at him, getting angrier each second passing by. Being kept in the dark wasn't something that you fancied.

"Excuse me? Are we really doing this again Nicky?" You said, your tone exposing your frustration. Your mind brings up memories of your first time in this speakeasy, where Nicky left you stranded because of business. But now you are a part of the Valentino family, so what was the problem.

His expression softens as he takes in a deep breath. You tried your best to understand what made him so uptight.

"You two... are you together?"

Matteo's voice made you snap out of your thoughts as you turned to Nicky, who was definitely not in a good state of mind seeing that he froze.

"Nicholas-"

"We're not together."

His words hit you like a ton of bricks. The waves of shock washed over you as you dropped your gaze on your hands. The thought of leaving right now seemed like a good idea but something inside of you was telling you to dig this situation deeper. This wasn't Nicky, you had to find out what was disturbing him so profoundly.

"Still that doesn't explain your overprotective response, Nicholas. Nonetheless, I am glad if Venus is single by any means."

"Let's get this venture over with, shall we Matteo?"

You wouldn't be lying if you said that this was the first time you saw Nicky this aggressive. He looked like he was so close to shot Matteo dead. You didn't say a word throughout their conversation. Patiently waiting for Nicky's breaking point.

The business they fussed about didn't seem skeptical at all. It was the usual, large amounts of illegal cash transactions and exchanging men for personal protection. Still, your questions remained unanswered. So you decided to follow up with plan B.

"If that's all, it's time for us to leave. Buona serata, Matteo."

Nicky said as he stood up. You, on the other hand, remained unruffled as you grasped your glass tightly completely ignoring him.

"So, Mr. Bianchi, you and Nicky seem to have a history. Do you two go way back? Based on something other than business-related, of course."

Upon hearing your voice Nicky slowly sat back. Taking in a deep breath, he averted his eyes to the bar. Trying to avoid Matteo's gaze.

"Oh, he didn't tell you?"

"No, he did not."

Matteo let out a breathy laugh as he took a cigar out of the silver case placed in front of him. Nicky's hand sneaked up on top of yours under the table, holding it firmly. You intertwined your fingers with his.

"Have you ever heard of The Count of Monte Cristo, (y/n)?"

"Alexandre Dumas, how can I not? One of my favorite novels."

"You become even more interesting by the second, my dear."

Nicky started to pull on his collar to get it loose. His grip on your hand gets even tighter. You can feel the distress radiating over him but you had no choice, he wasn't planning on opening up to you when he should've.

"Our situation is similar to Dantès, Mondego, and Mercédès love triangle. Nicky thinks that I am the Mondego of our scenario."

Finally, it sinks in. Still searching for more clarity you ask,

"You betrayed him, by stealing his lover--"

"Aha! That's the part I am trying to justify for the past five years. I didn't steal her- Minchia! I didn't know that she and Nicky had a thing. I mean she ran after him for quite some time but Nicholas didn't give a shit. How could I know?"

"Matteo cut the bullshit."

Nicky said, eventually joining to your conversation. You most definitely understood the situation at last. At this point it wasn't important whether or not if Matteo was right or wrong, Nicky was insecure at the fact that there might be a possibility of such a thing happening. He couldn't take risks when it comes to you, so he just acted like you meant nothing to him as if that would make Matteo uninterested.

Now that your worries came to an end, your only interest was to get Nicky all riled up.

"I think I heard enough."

Both of them stopped their bickering, turning their appalled gaze towards your direction.

"It looks like we are dragging out our dirty laundries. Well then, let me do my part."

Your devilish smirk took over as your playful aura filled the air.

"So, there is this guy, or more like this utterly, unbelievably handsome fella that makes my heart flutter."

"Oh? Tell me more Venus."

You focused your gaze on Matteo, eyeing him from head to toe. Knowing damn well that Nicky was watching your every move.

"He is compassionate, determined, enthusiastic, fearless, hard-working, kind, loyal, and everything that only a real man can be."

"Gesù Cristo! Who is this man? Are you sure that he isn't just a piece of your beautiful imagination?"

You laughed at Matteo's words. You were savoring every second of this mess, meanwhile, Nicky was chugging his whiskey on rocks.

"I would say that he is a gift from the gods, but unfortunately he is lacking something very important."

"He must've stolen the devil's dime. What does such a man lack that made you back up?"

You looked at the pair of hazel eyes intently watching you. You took a couple of seconds, staring adoringly into his beautiful eyes. You caught yourself getting lost in the honey hue of them. His feelings dripping from his glance, telling a story that only his eyes could tell.

"He is not honest."

You said without separating your eyes from Nicky's. Matteo raised his eyebrows, looking at Nicky and then back at you.

"Do I know this fella?"

"I don't know. All I know is that I like my men bare, in various ways."

Nicky laughed under his breath, placing his hand on top of your thigh.

"Oh my, do you?"

You grasped his tie pulling him to yourself, your lips almost touching his.

"You have no idea-"

Matteo cleared his throat,

"I should get going, you wouldn't want your girl falling for me. I know that my charming nature could cause trouble for a lot of people."

He said as he gave you a wink,

"Get lost Matteo."

Nicky hissed as Matteo approached you taking your hand in his giving it a goodbye kiss.

"Pleasure to meet you, (y/n). I hope that one day you can introduce me to the guy that got you head over heels."

He said jokingly as he turned to leave. Nicky slowly leaned in to kiss you but you stopped him midway.

"I don't kiss random men that have nothing to do with me, Mr. Valentino."

He gave you a smirk that summarized his plans for tonight.

"I might have nothing to do with you, but I certainly have a lot to do to you toots."

You took the last sip from your now empty glass and lifted it in the air.

"Cheers to the mess, my darling."

Vocabulary:

Minchia: in this context used as fuck, as exclamation of surprise.

Gesù Cristo!: Jesus christ!

Buona serata: “have a good evening”

[jjungkooksthighs]

finally got enough time to read yearn for you and girl!!!!! where do I start from? first of all, I'm sorry you did not receive enough love for this fic but I'll try my best to try and express all the gratitude for you. ok so, this is gonna be messy because english is not my first language and I'm a bit dyslexic so forgive me😔... I remember reading edacity and thinking damn! she can write! and got soooo hooked on the way you write. then I stumbled on claws of carnality and I already told you anything I had to say about this fic: a masterpiece. then I decided to read undercurrent (I couldn't read it straight away because of how long it is and how hectic life could be) but then again, what else could I have expected from you? the way you described the scenes (don't wanna spoil anything if people didn't read it yet).. it was like I was there (this applies for all of your fic but this one has something different to it? can't really describe it, I'm sorry). you are such a talented writer, so elegant, so eloquent, so detailed, so entrancing, so attractive in a way? so when you announced you were going to post another story I was thrilled! and you delivered, god, did you deliver. I was so frustrated with jk at the beginning of the story, you pulled me in your story with just a few sentences.. but at the story went, I felt so content because of how you described their relationship, the trust they have in each other, the desire to please the other, the love you can basically feel through the words and when I was reading about the flashback, I could feel the love. I also loved how even if he is a hard dom, he is so whipped for her... when she stands after he strips her and he sees her kick her heels off and he grins? my heart beat a little faster, don't ask me why. I loved how even if jimin was there, he could also have not been there at all and the after care? the way he is basically going around, calling her his fiancee, love them. at the end, my greedy, curios brain (and heart, who am I kidding) wanted more lmao. I have a few questions if you don't mind.. what happens with taehyung? because he was a bit of a brat, trying to get in her pants and then complaining when he got a bit left out? honey, you got a big storm coming. will you ever write little drabble for this couple? like, how did he propose? not gonna lie, kinda curious about the dress he picked out for her for the gala.. no pressure tho baby, feel free to ignore this part. I also loved how he called her petal and flowers and how he didn't even think twice about buying the necklace. want something like this for me, it would be the life, having someone you love who loves you back and is always ready to remind you... anyway, this is all for today, gonna go read yean for you a few more times now☺️🥴. hope you are having a good day, we love you💙

Your english is very impressive for someone that doesn’t speak it primarily, darling. You don’t need to apologize for being dyslexic, either. You can’t help that and should not apologize for something beyond your control. Anyway, you found me through Edacity, huh? It’s always interesting hearing about how you guys find me, I have to say. That one was written in a lust filled craze following the video that the gif used for that fic was recorded from. Manbun Jungkook really took my pussy (and fingers) and said WORK FOR IT. Ugh, he’s just so hot istg I really couldn’t help myself when I wrote that fic, lol. Anyway, it’s cute that you cycled through like all of my fics and I’m glad that you liked my work enough to keep reading through everything that I had posted on here! I will say that Undercurrent is very precious to me because it’s the very first reader x member fic that I wrote and posted to Tumblr. I love that story so much and I’m so elated to know that you appreciated it as much as you did! It took about two weeks for that like YFY, but every time that I sat down to write it, I just would smile like an idiot whenever I’d read through it at how cutely I encapsulated the lovers to be in their feelings for each other. 

Truly, who else writes a damn novel for their first ever fic? Gah, I am still so soft over Undercurrent. That fic is like my first child, lol. It is very special to me. So is COC, but we all know my sentiments about that fic at this point. I feel like I’m being annoying with it, but the self-consciousness and insecurity about that one still persists and whenever I hear about it from my readers, I get nervous because I have this lingering anxiety that more negative comments will be given on it. Well, this ask isn’t about COC, so I should move on, I think. Sorry about that mini-rant, anon!

Switching back to YFY, Jungkook’s personality in this one is a little different than what I have done before and I am glad that you liked the way he’s built in terms of his characterization. I wanted to show a Jungkook that was so in love with you that he is willing to give you anything you want (even if that means fucking another man) while also staying true to the possessive creature that we all know he is in real life. He adores reader very much and because of that, he just wants to see her happy at the end of the day. She is a constant in his life and gives him stability where the world would fall apart under his feet and he cherishes her for that for sure. I adored their relationship just as you did because they care about each other so much and each one of them just wants to please the other always. It’s funny that you say that Jimin could have not been there because the person that commissioned this fic from me actually wanted just a CEO!Jimin fic in the beginning, lol. Kook wasn’t even factored into the story in the initial stages and it actually was going to be a hybrid CEO!Jimin fic where he goes into heat while at work, but that idea was never fully fleshed out because Jungkook had to come out with his D’ICON stuff and really, it was over for me when I saw that video of him in the leather fit. 

I talked to my commissioner about it and she was more than eager to have Kook involved in the fic (even though she originally thought that I would not go so far as to write 31.5k words worth of shit that Kook was responsible for over 22.3k for before Jimin even makes an appearance, lol. I couldn’t really help it being the Jungkook slut that I am, but hey, it brought such sin out of it and I can’t apologize for THAT because it was too much fun to keep writing the lewd escapades of reader and her fiance that loved his future wife too much to deny her of anything so as long as he is part of it. 

As for Taehyung, well...let’s just say that Jungkook had a nice “chat” with Taehyung and the two ended the discussion with Jungkook sat in his office while Taehyung got to listen to a recording of reader fucking herself with Jungkook’s name falling repeatedly from her lips. Taehyung may or may not have had a tent in his pants while Jungkook gave a cruel smirk and when you’re summoned to his office, let’s just say that Taehyung gets a nice show while Jungkook fucks you over his desk. Now, this is done AFTER Jungkook orders you to bind Taehyung’s wrists with his tie so that he can’t do anything while he watches, his lips drawn between his teeth the entire time that Jungkook fucks into you like a crazed man. When it’s all over and you lie boneless on the desk, Jungkook eats the sandwich you brought him off your stomach before eating you out and let’s just say that when Taehyung leaves the office, his cheeks have never been more red both with embarrassment and rage. 

Wow, I really let myself keep going with that, huh? I guess that shows just how much I’m fond of YFY, lol. 

I would consider writing a drabble for YFY, but that would have to be commissioned as I am facing a financial crisis right now and can’t really afford to spend time writing anymore unless I will be compensated for it! It’s very sweet to ask that because it shows me you want more of this story and that’s very heartening to know!

As for the dress, I would be more than happy to show it to you if you message me (you can go through anon again if you prefer) once more with that question because this ask is already really long! 

Also, I’m pleased to know that you liked the pet names! I have a weakness for them, you see, so you’ll find an abundance of that in just about everything you read from me. 

It would be quite a life to have a man like YFY Jungkook in it, wouldn’t it? You would never want for a thing with him, that’s for sure. You also would never feel deprived of attention or love because he’d readily relinquish both to you 24/7. I wanna swoon over YFY Jungkook because he’s just so dreamy, isn’t he? 

Anyway, I am so happy to hear you liked the story. Thank you for reading my work and taking the time to say all of that, lovely. It really makes my day so much better when you guys tell me things like this and I can’t thank you enough for being nice enough to let me know all of this!

[virgocity]

I’m so glad you enjoyed 7! It’s really nice to see that it’s kinda captured a lot of people who had started to kinda break away from bts and showed them that they can still make music as well as they used to. I think they definitely lost themselves last couple albums, even though I really enjoyed them I could still see why people like you didn’t. But I really think they’re back now, or hope at least! Plus vmins duet broke me, it’s so pure and sweet 😭

I was really pleasantly surprised by 7. In a weird way, it reminded me of Gfriend.

One thing I LOVE about Gfriend is that in LOL, Time for Us, Fever Season and Labrintyh, I feel like you can HEAR their growth as a group and you can really feel that new maturity and more advanced sound but without EVER losing what makes them Gfriend. That's how 7 felt to me. Friends, On, Filter and We Are Bulletproof didn't really do it for me but the other songs really impressed me, especially the solos.

Taehyung and Jin's songs (Inner Child and Moon, I think? I'm sorry, I only listened in the car so I don't have all the names perfect yet) surprised me so much. They didn't sound anything like Stigma/Singularity or Awake/Epiphany but it was still THEM. Louder Than Bombs, Respect and 00:00 felt like the BTS that I'd been so deeply obsessed with back in the day.

Like I said yesterday, I don't think I'll ever get back to being a BTS stan like I was from 2015 to 2018 and I don't see me posting about them, talking about them and following their variety appearances and all that but I was always hoping that the music got back to what it was because I loved it so much. Dark & Wild through Young Forever was one of my favorite K-Pop discographies but I really fell out of step with the Love Yourself sound and Persona REALLY fell flat for me. I was kinda putting all my eggs in the 7 basket to decide whether or not I'd check out future releases and I'm so happy to say that my fears didn't materialize. I like what they did on 7. I like that the whole album FEELS like springtime. I like that they retained their old school Bangtan feel and some of the songs got back to their roots, back to the thing that MADE THEM BTS and made them so unique back in 2014-2016.

And that was why I asked my followers if there were any OG BTS stans who gave the album a listen and felt the same way. I'm really curious if anyone else who'd sort of give up gave it a try and was happy with the "new" sound. Most of my old BTS mutuals have long since jumped ship and put their BTS listening days in the past but I figured there had to be a few like me who were curious enough about the music to try it.

The bar for me with BTS is that I'm always looking for music I can write to. They've been on my writing playlists since I've 2015 but the last few albums haven't given me anything that inspired me and that's what turned me off. But 7 has multiple songs that made me want to write after just one listen and that really energized me.

Thanks for giving me a chance to write down all these feelings, anon! I appreciate that you cared enough to be at all invested in my rocky journey with BTS lmao K-Pop is really an interesting experience.