#I still have those 2 huge states but that's not really possible to be fixed at the moment and I now have time to actually handle them

[zenathezee]

Being able to go to my boss and say "the difference between me happy to work here until I go to grad school and wanting to quit everyday is this one thing" and have her be like yeah that's fair is SO POWERFUL

[deathsmallcaps]

Adam The Raven Cycle Headcanons

I think we all underestimate how much Adam’s rural poverty affects his looks and history, especially towards the beginning of the series.

1. Rural Appalachians often have mostly British ancestry. The British often have narrow mouths that are prone to overcrowding. This sort of problem takes money to fix. Therefore, Adam probably did not have nice teeth at the beginning of the series. He might be fixing it as an adult in college, but that really depends on how much money he has and/or is willing to throw at it right now. He may smile close-lipped a lot, or has the urge to cover his mouth with his hand. They might be yellowish, they might be crooked, he could have an under or overbite.

2. Adam most likely kept his hair really short for a good amount of his life, because lice. And/or, he had a mullet at one point, just because they’re good at keeping hair out of your face if done well, and keeps your neck warm when it’s cold. This practice likely changed once he entered Aglionby for fitting in purposes, but yeah. He may have mustache, if he can grow one (I don’t remember), because that’s very popular for young men in the South. And certainly taking scissors to it to ‘style’ it occasionally is cheaper than buying razors all the time. There’s a good chance he cuts all of his hair.

3. His hands are likely still calloused from all his jobs. It’s said in the books his hands are dry and cracked, and that he used to lick them to try and soothe them. Maybe he bought lotion once in a moment of ‘weakness’ (because he doesn’t want to waste money) and his friends top it off occasionally and hope he doesn’t notice it’s a different color or smell. Because he’s not going to buy more.

4. He’s either a huge neat freak or genuinely doesn’t know a lot about cleaning. That’s how you cope if you live in a trailer year round. You either keep everything as neat as possible, looking cleaning tips like a bored housewife. Or you leave crumbs and cooking scraps because having roaches in your kitchen is just a part of life.

5. I’m going to do some math, skip down to END OF MATH if you don’t care :/

Virginia’s minimum wage in 2012, when the books started being published, was $7.25. If Adam SOLELY used the money from his jobs for the reminder of his tuition ($18,423), that means he had to work 2,541 hours and 7 minutes a year to make that money. Let’s round that up to 2700 because he might need schoolbooks or food or occasionally pay for transportation.

Considering he has to make $18,423 a year, he’s skirting the next tax bracket pretty close *unless* he is working under the table. Since it’s already crazy that he’s doing this shit, let’s assume he’s working under the table. Because otherwise this gets even more miserable. In any case, if he needs to work 2700 hours to make it, he‘ll end up grossing $19,575.

Average American summer is about 8 weeks. So if transportation to each job is 45 minutes, including getting up and ready, etc, because of weather and iffy transportation options, and let’s say he’s working two shifts at two jobs, maybe eating lunch during work or transportation, that means if he allowed himself 6 hours of sleep a night during the summer, he would be ‘transporting’ 2.25 hours a day (I’m going to round it up to 2.5 to account for lunch and to make it easier), that’s a 15.5 hour day.

7 days a week times 15.5 hours times eight weeks is 868 hours, he’s made $6,293 out of the $19,575 needed. Leaving $13,282 to make.

Winter break is about 2 weeks in southern states like Virginia. A week for Spring. Three weeks. Assuming he can get similar hours at his jobs as he did in the summer, that’s 325.5 hours, and $2359.875. I’m going to round it down to $2359. So now he *just* needs to make $10,923 (lol).

Now, using those season break numbers, that leaves 41 weeks in a year for school. However, the average school week is 5 days, and school years in VA are 180 days. So if there never were any holidays and snow days, etc, school would take 36 weeks to complete.

In the interest of not going crazy, let’s work with the average school week of 5 days and say there’s 36 of those. I’m sure Adam worked holidays, but this will roughly amount to the same thing.

I think I remember Adam did early morning shifts and pulled 16 hours on the weekends during the schoolyear. So we’ll work that into his average school day.

Adam still needs to make $10,923. If he works 15.5 hours on a weekend day (using the same numbers as the summer calculations)(Saturday and Sunday that’s two days) for 36 weeks, that’s $8,091 out of the $10,923. That kid works to the bone. Leaving just $2,832 to make to reach that necessary minimum.

$2,832 comes out to about 390 hours and 37 minutes left needed to work. Let’s round it to 391.

That means if spread out over 36 weeks, he needs to work 10 hours and 52 minutes a week. Let’s bring it up to 11 hours.

The average high school day is 7.5 hours, including lunch. So that leaves 16.5 hours in Adam’s weekday.

HOWEVER. He still needs to do schoolwork. The average American teen spends 3.5 hours of time on schoolwork. I think Adam could probably power through it, and not really get distracted like ya girl but also it’s a private school and he’s taking all the hard classes. And hard classes like to pile shit on. So let’s go with 3.5 hours, every weekday. Yes he skips school for injuries a lot, maybe he gets more schoolwork done or job work done during that time. That’s harder to account for.

So that leaves 13 hours for non school activities.

He likely works in 2-3 shifts to cover the eleven hours each week, or maybe it depends on the week - maybe this week he has to work all 5 mornings, maybe the next week he works none. But let’s assume he splits it over all five days for averages sake. That means that 11 hours a week is 2 hours and 12 minutes a day (let’s bring it up to 15 minutes.). So 2.25 hours. Meaning he now has 10.75 hours left in the day.

Assuming transportation including getting ready and going to bed etc is as usual 45 minutes, that means he’s going to work, to school, to home every day. That’s another 2.25 hours. Now he has 8.5 hours left in the day.

Let’s assume he dedicates one third of his available weekday hours to friends. At 8.5 hours for non school non work non homework non transportation time, that means he spends 2 hours and 50 minutes with friends. Let’s round it to 3 hours. Because having fun with friends really does take that kind of time! And he’s really close with those peeps.

END OF MATH

That means he’s getting at most 5.5 hours of sleep on the weekdays.

I don’t remember if he works like this *throughout* all the first series’ books or just the first book. But your boy is tired as fuck. His skin is terrible. His eyebags have eyebags. He probably has a lot of wrinkles and grime under his nails. And he’s going to look even more haggard after ‘breaks’ and on Mondays especially.

I don’t remember how he affords that apartment in later books.

In any case, our boy does not look well at all.

6. This is going to fuck him up severely once he hits college too. I don’t remember if he got loans or scholarships or what. But even if he got a full ride, he’s going to be recovering sleep and health wise for years to come. He probably struggles to eat a salad sometimes. He needs to, for sure, but it’s so outside his taste buds’ usual range and his wallet’s usual range. And no one ever helped him figure out what dressing or vinaigrette made it tolerable for him. That boy has been living on canned food sales and ramen forever. He might get a meal plan and get sick from trying new foods or still act like he’s paying for each piece of food at the grocery store.

7. Very good chance he’s a coupon clipper and still has a little trouble convincing himself that he doesn’t need to buy 6 cans of beans just because they’re $5 all together. Instead of the just one can that he needs this week.

[exeggcute]

the pendulum of opinion swingeth I guess. and swingeth wildly lol. the "addiction isn't real" shit feels a lot like the "disability is primarily a social/accessibility issue (rather than a medical issue)" shit to me because I think they both mean well and come from the same impulse (i.e., a desire not to pathologize traits that are actually "normal"/common/otherwise value-neutral) but do so in a way that not only starts with a conclusion and works backwards to prove it, which is obviously not the best approach, but also tries to hard to dodge an existing pitfall that it creates new and exciting pitfalls in the process.

uncharitable 2 AM thoughts but chewing it over I also am starting to wonder if like, okay. zeroing in on the disability part here because I think that's both a broader category and further up the river of conclusions. I do kind of get the sense that the "in a perfectly just and accommodating world, no one would be disabled" angle tends to come most forcefully from people whose perspective on disability either focuses solely on neurodivergence or on (surface-level) mobility issues specifically. things that affect how you navigate the world, essentially. because those are for sure two areas where social improvements have a huge and positive impact! maybe even two areas where you could reasonably argue that social improvements are enough to remove the barriers that "disable" people in a verb way, full stop.

but extrapolating that to all forms of disability is less useful, because not all disabilities are primarily issues of accessibility, and if it's not broadly true across the board then I think its fair to say it's just basically not true. you end up glossing over too much shit. not that social improvements aren't helpful, but many disabilities come from the fact that your body needs to do certain things to stay alive but is not always good at doing them properly, so you're gonna have to address that directly at some point. I don't think it's an accessibility issue when your trachea collapses or your kidneys start to give out or your immune system starts tearing up the wires in your spine. and yeah you could circle back to say, well, the accessibility piece here is really about access to treatment, which is fair! but that still requires finding and developing treatment in the first place, which leads us back to the "this is a pathology to fix/address" thing. permanent treatment or otherwise. I guess I think it's not only true that some states of physiological equilibrium are like, objectively ideal, but also possible to accept that premise without fucking over anyone who isn't in that equilibrium. or even zooming out, I think it's possible to strive for a cure to to "my body is bad at surviving"-type conditions in a way that doesn't also imply that the people with those conditions are not worthy of surviving otherwise. and I think that if we ever figure out a cure for celiac disease there's gonna be parades in the streets

[slythereen]

Hi! Sorry I wasn’t more clear.

Being a Charles fan I actually have nothing nice to say about the clown team. I just meant it more like Newey is not going to Ferrari because of Hamilton?

Speculation has always been since he’s joining then maybe there would be new talent in engineering or something, which I don’t think it’s happening. Two of the reasons why Ferrari has trouble in attracting new talent (from my very superficial point of view) is they are based in Italy, compared to a lot of teams based in the UK, and is really more of a state-owned institute than a race team in terms of change and efficiency. And even though there’s Fernando, but this move with the huge salary and financial backing promised for his over projects looks much more like it’s not going to be longer than 3(2+1) years. Why would engineers move all the way just to work with him for 2-3 years. And I remember reading about anti-poaching in his current contract too, so when people were excited for Mercedes talent, it’s probably not happening.

But did Newey once say he wants to work with Hamilton? Right now google only has how they are going to be at Ferrari next year(maybe). If there was then I shall concede Newey is amongst those that have always dreamed to work for Ferrari and Hamilton.

Sorry I ranted way too long. <333333

these are good points! and frankly you probably know the situation better than me, as i’m still catching up on the historical stuff and some of the… intra-team dynamics? historical dynamics?

i totally agree that ferrari is lewis’s retirement plan btw. i mean, that contract really is perfectly packaged to set him up to fulfill a dream (driving for ferrari) and then to swan off into ambassadorship with class and a good bow out. which is actually a VERY GOOD POINT regarding newey, as i hadn’t considered that! my best guess would be that newey is looking to retire soon (or now) too (and all of his recent interviews lean that way, so one last short term project with LH helping get ferrari back to excellence would be a nice send off for newey.

that being said, i frequently forget how delayed f1 development is. like, some of the poached talent ferrari is bringing in is garden leaved until 2026. newey would be working on the 2026 car — not even 2025! LH himself is out of reach until next season. it’s kind of wild to me how one bad year (cough, 2022) can set you back SO badly, because these problems can’t be fixed in a season or with any speed whatsoever (and then you get 2023…). so. it’s very possible the short term project couldn’t be very short term at all to be meaningful, which means not much of a quick little ferrari chapter before retiring peacefully.

also: yes, regarding the quote! newey said something along the lines of how he has three main regrets looking at his career, one being to work with lewis hamilton and the other to work for ferrari. (i forget what the third was because frankly it wasn’t as relevant to me 💀) it is somewhat recent i think? two months? it was circulating around during the LH to ferrari rumors because ppl were saying he could get 2/3. or maybe right after the LH to ferrari confirmation.

let me look (i think it’s around here somewhere) & will toss into the replies if i find it b/c mobile is evil and will eat this draft if i tab out to find it

[getvalentined]

Ever Crisis: Final Overview

Okay so my final verdict on Ever Crisis as a whole is that it's worth playing! This is particularly true if you're the kind of person who is into micromanaging equipment and the like; if you enjoyed the junctioning system in FF8, the sphere grid in FF10, or the crystarium in FF13, EC's various systems will probably be fun. (Once you get them unlocked. It's a bit of a slow start in that.)

After finishing certain sections you get access to "criterion dungeons" which are kinda like other segments of the original game (playwise, not storywise) that were cut from the main portion of EC; they have limitations and prerequisites that mean they generally can't just be immediately cheesed by the autobattle system, making them difficult in a way that I personally consider highly enjoyable. A fun challenge with a little more free movement, albeit still not as much as I'd like.

Being able to look at it as a whole, I really think that this is a good way to handle it. The main story portion of EC is designed to carry you through the story so you can experience it firsthand without too much difficulty, broken into bite-size portions that you can clear in about 5 minutes a pop; criterion dungeons, enhancement material missions and multiplayer battles are for people who want more controlled gameplay on top of what the main story provides.

I do still think that the OG story section is the weakest in terms of gameplay, but once you get out of Chapter 1 it's actually not that bad! I think this is because the story doesn't really properly kick off until Cloud falls into the church anyway, so that whole first section is a bit of a slog—and it was probably quite difficult for the dev team to break it down into a period shorter than the 2+ hours it took in the original version. It's very clearly abridged, but actually not bad.

Still not a fan of the cast of First SOLDIER. I'll get through that with gritted teeth.

There are some fairly egregious graphical issues and artistic inconsistencies, including an actual visible erasing error in Aerith's portrait, but those are mostly things that can be fixed between now and the proper launch.

The biggest graphical concerns for me were with regard to screen flashing. The screen flashes to black in between each wave of a fight, and then flashes back to life when the new wave has loaded, which is a huge issue for photosensitivity and is something I commented on extensively in the official survey.

Likewise, I experienced some pretty severe shader flickering, which is a big accessibility issue—I sent in a video, which I will not embed here because y'all don't need to see that. In spite of stating that I didn't expect a response to the inquiry in question, I received a clearly-not-canned reply within about eight hours stating that it is in fact a serious issue and that they would be working to rectify it as quickly as possible, although they were sorry that they probably wouldn't have an update to fix it before the end of the beta. That was a pleasant surprise, and gives me a lot of hope for cleaning up those issues and making the game more accessible.

Overall, as a whole game with all titles and systems taken into account, I'd give Ever Crisis a solid 7.5/10.

[vvatchword]

I'm tired of writing this already because my Dr. Lamb is either the most boring, unemotive, or noble person imaginable. This is the whole reason I have been avoiding her section. The reason: Dr. Lamb is, and has always been, a huge nothingburger. In-game, she's just That Way. She doesn't BECOME That Way, she just is, and it's arguable she has always been so. There's even an audio diary that suggests she has had designs on Rapture since time immemorial (lol wat).

This is because BioShock 2 is a fucked-up attempt at a Christian gnostic allegory and Dr. Sofia Lamb is a stand-in for the Aeon Sophia. It's awful for a lot of reasons that I'll get into someday--not the least reason for which is that THE LITERAL AEON SOPHIA IS IN THE FUCKING GAME. The allegory cannot fucking work if you just stick the actual fucking Aeon Sophia alongside your allegorical symbol for the Aeon Sophia. Then it's not an allegory, is it? That said, 2K Marin probably made this game without sleeping or regular human contact so they can be forgiven for a lot.

Anyway, I decided to start her as an Objectivist and a human being, if an extremely autistic and traumatized one, and move her left.

What makes a person decide to be an Objectivist and isolate oneself on the bottom of the ocean is equally present in certain individuals and movements on the left: it's a deep insecurity and a sense of powerlessness because one can't control what other people do. So if you can't control other people, you CAN try to minimize their impact on you and just straight-up leave. It's the completely futile effort to control as many environmental factors as possible to make the least surprising world possible.

Where this impulse heads into toxic territory is when these kinds of people get really frustrated and just try to apply force. "ALL Y'ALL BETTER JOIN THE CLUB OR I'M GETTING THE BAT"

So... where do I exhibit this toxic behavior in Lamb? And why doesn't it feel natural to me? I've actually given her more emotive states than she has in-game. She's more reserved, to be sure, but she still fucking feels things and is motivated by those feelings, even if she lies to herself about it. Moreover, one cannot be reserved 100% of the time. One will and can snap, and sometimes those kinds of people snap in nasty ways because they're keeping most of their stress inside and hidden.

I suppose I should make her a little more toxic from the beginning. I've actually made her extremely sensible. I try to give most of my characters laudable traits, even if they're pure fuckers--issues they're right about or ways they're competent and skilled. I may have made her TOO competent and sensible. She may be too boring for fiction, idk. There's a reason nobody in fandom likes to write about her. We all know somebody just like her irl and we try to escape them as quickly as possible; we don't want to actually write about their judgy holier-than-thou asses for any length of time.

I'm very frustrated about this and I'm not sure how to fix it. It feels like a systemic issue, like a flaw or behavior that should be present from the beginning. I should probably try and make her more controlling from the beginning, but that'll take some rewriting and editing... guhhhhhh. Not during NaNo.

I might brainstorm some weird shit that I could make her do to fuck up the story a bit and see what seems natural and sticks.

I mean, if you have an idea, or have read a story with Lamb in it that you think is particularly good, hit me up ok

[meimi-haneoka]

IIRC, Rewind is the only Clear Card not yet seen/used in this climax. What do you think will be its purpose?

P.S. I'm irrationally happy about that Toothless gif in the chapter analysis post (as a HTTYD fan) 😄

That's right, Rewind is indeed the only card left (out of the 3 that we knew of) that hasn't shown their cute face ever since it was secured! 😉(that's also why the ENG translation was hugely mistaken when it made Momo say "There's ONE card left" in relation to Time) And this means Rewind almost certainly will have a huge role in the climax. (Damn, if I think about the fact it even got the honor to be the title of the 2nd ED theme of the Clear Card anime........sung by Minori Suzuki/Akiho, no less!)

What do I think will be its purpose....truth to be told, I have thought about more than one use for it. We have only seen it activated when it turned Syaoran back into his baby form, so that's the limit of what we have seen it doing, but since the scope of the Clear Cards changes basing on Sakura's wishes, it might do more than just that. So basing on a more "relaxed" interpretation of what Rewind's powers are, I have thought about:

Bring a situation back to its previous state. It can be any of the difficult and complex issues at hand (the rewriting of the world operated by Momo's Time Book, the Seal of D. applied on Kaito that's keeping him transformed as a dragon, something else that will happen later, etc...)

I know, it started as a joke, but now I'm seriously considering it: Sakura might use it on Kaito to solve his own very complex situation. The guy literally put himself in a huge mess because he's not only been transformed into a dragon due to the Seal of D. that was carved into his body (that's the wording the Association literally used to describe it, and I feel sick everytime I think about it), he also took in himself the artifact (in the shape of a book) that was inside Akiho before, with all the huge amount of spells it collected that Momo said his weakened state wouldn't be able to stand, and there's also the shortened lifespan due to all the time manipulation magic he used back in the original world. It's a very dire situation and I honestly cannot see a simple way to fix them all, if not in the shape of a spell that would "undo" all of the above. I know, I've seen sometimes points of view saying that they wouldn't like that because it would diminish (if not erase) the value of what Kaito did for Akiho (all that effort would've been wasted), but we also have to remember that what the guy did isn't exactly something that should be encouraged, not at those extremes, at least. It remains to be seen how Sakura would use it for that goal, though. I've imagined that Sakura could use Rewind to literally bring Kaito back to his state before he accepted to undergo the ritual to carve the Seal of D. on him. That would also return him some of his lifespan and probably do something about the artifact too (or they'll fix that in another way).

That can possibly mean Kaito's external appearance might go back to that of a teenager, the age he was when he said "I'll go". (I know, it sounds crazy but not crazy enough for CLAMP). His memories and conscience would still be the same, exactly how it happened to Syaoran in the chapter when Rewind was secured. Rewind is a very peculiar time manipulating Card, because it seems it changes only the external appearance of something to how it was in a previous time, but the "inside" (the conscience, in the case of human beings) remains the same, so I'm not even sure we can fully consider it a "time manipulating" type of Card. That's also why Kaito said it was "close" to the Card he wanted, but not quite it, because it wouldn't have really solved Akiho's problem that way.

Seems quite a convenient way, right? Especially seeing how he's put himself in a huge mess. But this is exactly how it was with the previous 2 arcs, too. They always ended with a simple resolution of things (with some "cheats") where feelings and personal growth were the protagonists of the peak of the climax, they didn't need huge boasting demonstrations of power. Moreover, I think the characters (all of them) have suffered enough. I'm really reaching a point (and I'm not the only one) where I only want to see the catharsis in a happy ending, I don't care how they get it. I used to say that probably Kaito would've needed to "leave something behind" or pay some kind of price for what he had done (messed with time, meddled with Sakura trying to make her produce a Card and then planning to use it without her consent, be blind till the end to Akiho's feelings and will and stepping over them with his own), but I have to say that, coming to this point, I think this guy has well pre-paid all his dues in advance. All the abuse he underwent, that curse that was imposed on him (because he either accepted it, or they wouldn't have allowed him to take Akiho out of there, she would've ended up going with someone else and.....I don't want to imagine), all the loneliness he had to endure because he knew that any bond he could've created with Akiho, even if he wanted to pursue it, would've being for nothing, knowing very well what awaited him ahead....I think that's enough. Maybe CLAMP will still make him leave something behind (his magic?), but I honestly don't think at this point it's really that necessary for a well balanced plot anymore. Besides, if they really somehow go the crazy route and rewind Kaito's appearance, it's surely not something I'd like to see (on one side, it would probably be more convenient for me, but precisely because I am sure that these two can work things out and be together at the right time exactly how they are right now, I don't consider necessary at all to shrink their age difference). But if that happens, and that means a happy ending for everyone, then I'll make it work for me too. Ps. I'm glad you appreciated the gif of this month!!! 😂❤️

[crystalelemental]

It didn’t occur to me, but the PokeFair Lodge spotlight rotation is getting an addition too.  We already have all the Fair units, with Cynthia, N, Marnie, and Raihan.  So...whoever they add is not going to be the Lodge unit, because that’s confirmed to be Dawn.

Which means it’s gotta be an alt.

That’s the only thing that makes sense, they’re powering up an alt rather than a base form.  I am going to assume that they’re working on PokeFairs that are pre-second year anniversary, given that Marnie and Raihan both got expansions.  Given this, we can rule out Lance, Steven, Gloria, Diantha, Ingo, and Emmet.  But we could get SS Red, SS Blue, or Champion Iris.

...do I even need to express my thoughts?

First, this sucks.  This is not a good trade.  Of the initial alts, four of them are in rather dire need of help (Train Bros are still really good), while the three that are possibilities...are fine.  SS Red has been so good that he’s still, STILL argued as being better than Leon.  I argue this.  Because he is.  His self-setup 100% makes him better Leon.  SS Blue is the only unit to have received an expansion long before those were real.  He’s still so good because of it that people argued SS Kris wasn’t worth it, because he was there.  I do think SS Blue could stand to gain a bit of consistency with his buffing that he currently lacks, but also his old expansion conflicting with a 5/5 expansion means they’re gonna go all out to make something work over what he currently has, so he doesn’t turn into a Marnie situation where you can’t afford the upgrade.  And Champion Iris...I mean, same deal, really.  Full energy cost shreds any hope of a seriously impactful upgrade for her.  She doesn’t want to give up her sync nuke multipliers, and that leaves 11 energy.  ELEVEN.  That is not a good amount.  She’ll afford one (1) tile; 5/5 nodes may as well be inaccessible.  Literally the only thing they could possibly do, is give her Defense Crush 9 and Power Play.  Anything short of that will not be worth it.

Meanwhile, Lance continues to have no ability to buff any stat, Steven’s still really sad on damage despite the striker designation, Gloria’s atrocious due to her condition for higher damage being a death sentence in CS and inconsistent in Gauntlet, and Diantha...okay honestly, I think Diantha’s actually fairly good at present, but she could still get some help.  The ones who need it most seem least likely to get anything.  Meanwhile three options that are already pretty damn good...may get more out of it.

I could be wrong.  I hope I’m wrong.  But I don’t expect to be.  We’ll see what happens.

As for who I’d hope for...I mean, obviously I want Iris.  I don’t respect Kanto.  I especially don’t respect Red and Blue given how much the genwunner fanbase sucks them off constantly as the bestest characters ever despite being boring as sin half the time.  Iris would be nice.  And legitimately, of the three, she needs the most help.

As stated, her grid is...a rough time.  She has 11 energy outside of her sync nuke build.  What I’d like is, as stated, for her to just have Defense Crush.  Double Down Defense Crush is so good that it’s argued as a lucky skill over CS2, solely for the raw power increase on random odds.  But to access anything, she’d need to give up a multiplier, and either Relentless or Power Play would be nigh-required.  I think Power Play synergizes best with her natural passive for move damage, Power Loving, but I’d take either.  Self-sufficiency has also been a huge focus, based on a unit like N’s upgrade, and Iris is similarly hosed when it comes to self-sufficiency.  Unfortunately, it would take two tiles to fix both attack and crit rate, and I have another thing I’d like to see.  Speed.  Iris’ gauge control is not great.  So here’s what I’d like to see.

Spaces above, we get one before the sync damage node, and two above in a straight line, with Devastation directly adjacent to the left.  I’d like to see Sharp Entry as the 2/5 addition below the sync damage node that tends to cost 7 energy, then Mind Games 9 as the 4/5 10 energy node, and MP Burst as the 5/5 10 energy node.  Mind Games is to make her more of a spectrum debuffer, potentially hitting everything if desired for her multipliers.  They cap out, but this offers Iris more of a utility role than she previously had.  “At 4/5?”  Listen.  Just let it go.

Spaces below, we get one above the sync damage tile, then one each to the left and right below.  The left side is adjacent to Pecking Order.  The node above, I’d put Berserker 1 on Trainer Move for 7, while the left will be Power Play 5/5, and the right will be Defense Crush 9 for 10 each.

Berserker and Sharp Entry provide perfect self-sufficiency with MP Burst, and are available in grids with current specs.  The goal is to take Devasttation over Pecking Order, keeping Iris with at least some level of team restriction as the harder condition to fill.  Sharp Entry (7), Sync damage (5), Snarl +4 (4), Devastation (10), MP Burst (10), Berserker (7), Power Play/Defense Crush (10) leaves her with 2 energy.  This gives her perfect self-sufficiency, trading Pecking Order for Power Play for slightly better sync damage, or reducing sync damage drastically in exchange for consistent defense debuffs.

Alternatively, if partnered with an attack/crit buffer, she can avoid the 7 energy nodes and go around, which saves 3 on Sharp Entry, and 10 on MP Burst.  15 extra energy means either three sync multipliers, or access to Defense Crush.

The only really acceptable alternative, at least to me, is placing Defense Crush near one of the sync multipliers at 4/5.  If it’s 5/5 above, it’s...going to be incredibly difficult to maintain her current level of sync nuke while gaining the most valuable node.  It’s Marnie and SS Leaf all over again; the allocations demand too much, and she can’t even afford the upgrade she gets.  I really hope they don’t keep doing that.  I know some PokeFairs did well 3/5 while others didn’t, but this full energy cost thing is a massive issue that holds these upgrades back severely.

[multiplayingorg]

What? You're Still Here?

| Repost: Originally posted by Rer on June 29, 2012

Its true, really! Click past the jump for more info on what's going on lately.

Sooo, yea, its been quite awhile since I last posted here, and while I believe I will be co-hosting tonight’s episode of Multiplaying (spoilers! that exists too!), I feel it is time to get back to blogging!

I suppose to best way to start its to explain what’s going on with me gaming-wise.  I am of course, still ridiculously active as a gamer, logging in about as many hours as physically possible (taking into account working, sleeping, and eating of course).  Despite all of this glorious gaming however, my content updates have been nonexistent.  My YouTube channel has really become barren as of late, and my posting on the Multiplaying forums has been minimal. Time to fix that!  So, with this post I am announcing the following projects, thus locking me in a blood-blogging-bound seal of finishing them!

Uncharted Waters Online

EVE Online

Orion: Dino Beatdown

Sword and Sworcery (if not a full playthrough of this)

Civilization V: Gods and Kings

Nuclear Dawn

And Many More!

I feel like those, in addition to finishing Darksiders and Cave Story+, should be more than enough to keep me occupied for the rest of this summer.  I attribute most of my apathy towards creating content around a rather negative attitude towards the Telecommunications Industry that I had for awhile.  Looking back however, letting some rather unfortunate events get in the way of continuously updating and posting (never stop posting!) was rather silly.

On a more positive note, gaming has been wonderful as of late.  I’ve been spending numerous hours playing EVE, as I have moved to a new corporation (SniggWaffe), known for being a very active recruiter corporation for one of Pandemic Legion’s most well-known corporations (Sniggerdly).  I’m enjoying myself there, as it is much like Multiplaying in the sense that the folks in PL play many different games together (Starcraft II, Battlefield 3, DEFCON, DayZ, and LoL come to mind).  A massive war is also brewing in Delve (a region in EVE), consisting of well.. just watch this:

(video is no longer available)

(Damn I need to bribe this guy with ISK to teach me how to do this in After Effects)

In regards to League, yes, LoL Coldcasts will be picking back up as well.  Iaqton says he has some special surprise for me involving a pro-team or something, but he’s keeping the details a secret from me until he’s sure its going to happen.  So, stay tuned for that I guess?  Either way, we both agree that its high time we got back to casting.  Iaqton has been riding me about it for awhile, but as I mentioned earlier, I just wasn’t in a good state of mind to get back into it.  I’m not sure if we’ll continue doing Tournaments (organizing people is a huge pain in the rear, who knew?), but we will definitely be doing something.

Last but not least, I’m building a new rig!  I’m not sure if I’ll be donating my old computer to my younger brother or a good friend quite yet, but either way I know it will be going to a good owner who will use it to its fullest potential.  I, however, will have a completely new rig that is being constructed by my friend.  Without getting too much into the tech it consists of a ASUS Rampage Intel Motherboard, a Intel Core i7, a Solid Slate Drive and normal 2TB Hard Drive, and 2 HD Radeon 6850′s that will be Crossfired with one another.  Needless to say, I’m super freakin’ excited.

That’s about it I suppose.  I just wanted to start blogging again and lock myself in to creating more content.  Thanks for reading and.. oh, oh oh!  One more thing!  The Tenth EVE Alliance Tournament qualifiers are this weekend!  Even if you don’t play EVE, you can expect some hilarious commentating and many explosions to take place, so stop by!

[alligatorjesie]

I love how OP is complaining 'capitalism isn't an answer to these questions' when if we just sit down with a shit scoop and dust away the clean surface litter of 'why people vote against their own interests' the stinky cat turd that is capitalism is right there under the surface.

Capitalism explains a lot of why people are stupid and vote stupid, and if definitely explains why a lot of us who are not so stupid and don't vote against our own interests still have to deal with corrupt corporate legislation that force shit options upon us.

In America we've turned schooling into a numbers and testing game that punishes schools who don't test well. That sounds correct on the surface but then when you dig around in the bullshit a little you realize they're literally only teaching these kids how to test and not how to do fucking anything else.

human restoration project did a long fuckin' video on how teaching the test is dicking over American public school systems

skip intro did one about a fictional school but it reflects a lot about what is wrong with real schools.

It's money.

It's always money.

Now we have schools filled with students who can't read good and teachers who ain't really allowed to teach anything but 'the test' and ain't even being paid well enough to babysit and a lot of this isn't this way because voters are stupid. It got this way because corporations own school book publishings. They decide what we learn and how we learn it from lobbying the fuck out of Congress to make it this way. Schools don't get a choice how they teach, and if they don't do it the way Congress wants then they don't get funding.

It's not even a conspiracy.

It's very look-up-able.

We literally just had a ballot measure in my state that was 'hey should we give the already poultry amount of we designate for public schools to private schools instead of public schools?' and thank fuck it lost but that shit got over 30% yes votes. Most of the houses that had 'vote yes on 2' signs in their yards didn't even have children living there.

I also noticed how a lot of those yards also had trump signs in them but that's a conversation for another day.

We don't have healthcare because we're told there's no better system out there besides the one with the absolutely fucking useless middle man who can deny you help because they deemed that cancer you developed from DuPont pouring Teflon into the waterways was pre-existing condition just to ensure shareholders get more of the pie at the end of the quarter. This wasn't even a measure we got to vote on this was just forced on us because of greed. Cooperations have corporate interests and lawyers and lobbyist that are paid very well to make that company as much money as possible.

This is one of the reasons you can't walk into a hospital in America and ask 'hey how much would it cost to do x?'. They won't tell you a price because it's fucking made up.

No joke. You can't find out how much it will cost to have a baby in a hospital in America and the hospital won't give you a price ahead of time because that price is heavy influenced by things like; if you have insurance or not, what income bracket you belong in, if your paying some shit in cash, just to name a few bullshit reasons.

We keep getting food recalls because huge food corporations have have financial interests to demand to monitor their own food safety rules instead of allowing the government to do it. We have a whole government agency that could be better staffed to handle this but there isn't a financial incentive to do that so we don't.

9 times out of 10 the reason shit sucks is because someone wanted to make money over being a decent human being.

It's not even fascism it's just regular ol' corporate greed.

which has roots in fascism no doubt.

Honestly, we could fix most of the problems in America if we just got rid of lobbying.

surely we could educate the people in matters of economics and social theory to make them less stupid in their voting.

Perhaps, but that's a multi-generational project of improving education, which doesn't solve the short-term problem of winning political campaigns. Indeed, the former is rather predicated on the latter.

[tojisbbg]

✭ 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 ✭

❝i just wanna see you shine ‘cause i know you are a stargirl.❞

♡ shinichiro sano ♡

pt.1, pt. 2 

a/n: this is my first time writing on tumblr so i decided to write about shinichiro first cuz finding fluff/smut about him is so rare. i hope you enjoy! let me know your thoughts in the comments. <3

➢ content: childhood friends, fluff, romance, friends to lovers, shinichiro is whipped for y/n, smut, not checked for grammatical errors.                                  

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶  ︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶     ︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

“what’s wrong?” you asked the driver, watching the man grunting in frustration as he kept on trying to churn the ignition key to get your car started again, but the car refused to budge. 

“not too sure, ma’am. it was working perfectly fine this morning when you sent me out to pick up your luggages. maybe the cables aren’t working too well or something. sorry, i’ll try to fix the car up as soon as possible.” he slightly stuttered, getting a bit nervous as he thought that you’d be like one of those cruel bosses that fire employees for things that they’re not responsible for. 

“hey, don’t get so worked up, it’s okay. i think i have a solution.” you grinned, making your driver look at you with pure confusion. 

“you know how to fix cars?” the look on his face was priceless, as he stared at you dumbfounded. 

“no, but i know someone who does. i’m gonna uber there, meanwhile, you stay here and have the car towed at this location. i’ll see you then.” you suggested, making your driver shrug as he went along with your plan. 

you arrived in tokyo early this morning, not even having the time to get some sleep at your own house. 

well, new house, to you at least. you brought your parents a huge place a few months back, which wasn’t too far away from where you lived before. but, it’s been about five years since you’ve last stepped your foot back in japan. 

you’ve been studying in the states, getting cast in for movies and tv shows during your rookie years, which surprisingly shot you straight into fame. you’ve been quite busy with your acting career, not even having the time to tend your own needs, such as making time to focus on your mental and physical health. 

you’ve shed off a couple pounds, probably a little more than just baby fat. either way, you were happy and satisfied with the way you looked before and now. after all, a certain someone would always remind you of how gorgeous you’d always look in his eyes. 

you felt really guilty for losing connection with all of your friends and families, barely even having the time to speak with your own parents. which is why you were happy that you were back home. hopefully, everyone would cut you some slack. 

your uber finally came to a stop, politely announcing that you’ve arrived to your destination. you grabbed your purse and thanked the uber driver as you got out of the car. you looked in front of you, the huge shop that had many motorcyles lined up, glistening from the bright lighting from inside as you beaked from the glass windows. 

s.s motorcycle shop.

unknowingly, your lips curled upwards into a smile. happy was an underestimating term to describe how you were feeling right now. you just felt so proud of shinichiro for being able to make his dream come into reality. you always knew that he could make it, and you weren’t wrong. 

he’s just too fucking amazing.

for some reason, your knees felt heavy and your heart pounded inside your chest from anxiety. you felt it a little difficult to breathe, turning away as you tried to decide whether you should step in or not. 

would he still remember you? is he mad at you for not calling him for thanksgiving or on christmas? what about mikey, will he ever forgive you for not calling to wish him a happy birthday? 

the question that bothered you the most was, what if shin had a girlfriend? were you too late?

the mere thought of that made your eyes water, as you quickly tried to shoo it away, not wanting to ruin the eyeliner that took you ages to perfect. 

fuck it. 

you breathed out before pushing the glass door, hearing a small chime of little bells on top of your head, indicating that someone came. 

“inupi! could you take that for me?” you heard someone in the back yell, immediately recognizing who owned the voice. to your surprise, his voice didn’t change much, aside from getting an octave deeper. 

“yeah, i gotchu, shin!” the other person responded, to which you soon saw a fairly tall man walking towards your direction from the back. he was in an all blue jumpsuit, wiping his greasy hands on the rag as he inched closer. 

he had shoulder-length blonde hair, a huge scar covering the upper left side of his face. 

“welcome to s.s motorcycle shop, what can i help you with?” he asked, offering you a small smile. 

“uh, can i talk to shinichiro?” you fiddled with the rings on your fingers, getting a bit awkward from the conversation. the guy thinned his lips, shaking his head. 

“sorry, he’s a little busy right now. but, i got him covered at the moment. so, what seems to be the problem? flat tire? oil change? engine leaks?” this inupi guy tried to insist you on allowing him to help you with your services. 

“i don’t think shin’s gonna mind sparing a few minutes of his time to catch up with his childhood best friend.” you bluntly responded, catching him off guard as inui looked at you with a face of slight disbelief. 

“huh?” he blurted out.

“oh, by the way, i’m y/n. the tow company is bringing my car here in a bit. my driver should be there too, so just give him my name. thanks, inupi.” you patted his shoulder before walking off to head towards the back of the shop, leaving poor inui confused and flustered. 

you turned the corner and saw a small room where a beautiful lavender colored motorcycle was currently being worked on. you leaned on the doorway, watching shinichiro tighten some screws with a wrench as his back was turned towards you, him being completely unaware of your presence. the surrounding ground was littered with different tools. 

“you think you could squeeze in some time to look at my car for me, sano?” you asked, a smirk dancing on your lips as you saw shinichiro’s movements coming to a halt. his head turned to look at you, his eyes widening to the size of two full moons. 

“what the fu.. y/n?!” he frantically yelled, dropping the wrench out of his hand as he quickly got up, rushing over to you as he caged you in a hug. you chuckled in his embrace, feeling his arms tightening around your waist as he dug his face in the crook of your neck, as if he was afraid that you’d run away from him again. 

the familiar smell of gasoline and other vehicle parts filled your nose, a strange form of comfort to say the least. you remember the days in your middle school and high school days where you’d spent the evenings in front of shin’s garage as he fixed his grandpa’s car or mikey’s old worn-out moped while your deftones playlist was on shuffle in the background. 

“i missed you so much, y/n.” his voice came out as a muffled croak, as you soon felt something wet on your shoulders. shinichiro sniffled, a little embarrassed to pull away and have you see him crying to you like a baby when he was supposed to be a grown man. 

but, he couldn’t help it. 

he still remembers as clear as day, waiting for you in front of your house patiently so that you both could walk to school together as per usual. he had big plans for that day, wanting to try out the new noodle place that opened up down the block. after some time had passed, he realized that it was pretty unusual of you to be this late. 

so, he went up to your door and knocked. your mother soon opened it and saw the boy look at her with a concerned face, quickly asking if you were okay. she tried to explain the situation as calmly as possible, not wanting to hurt him as she knew how close you both were. 

the woman saw how his face dropped, eyes becoming glossy as he tried to avoid making eye contact. your mother felt bad for him, but she tried to reassure him that you’d be calling him soon and that your return would also be soon as well. she told him to come over for dinner that night with the rest of his family. 

shinichiro walked to school alone that day, for the first time ever. the days where you couldn’t make it to school would be if you were sick, to which shin would miss school as well in order to nurse you back to health. so, walking alone to school felt weird and wrong, but it was something that he would get used to as many years passed by.

to shinichiro’s dismay, he never got a phone call or text from you. he tried many times to reach out to you, leaving so many voicemails and emails to your business and private numbers and emails. he even tried to contact your manager, to which she told him that he should hear back from you shortly. but of course, with the sea of emails and voicemails from directors and fans, shin’s methods of trying to get a hold of you would go down in the drain. 

“i missed you too, shin. i’m so sorry for not calling.” your voice broke, eyes stinging with tears as you felt him crying a little harder in your arms. you stroked the back of his head, mumbling so many ‘sorry’s’ to him. 

he suddenly pulled away, looking down at you with a pretty smile. he was still as handsome as ever, even if he was just wearing a simple white t-shirt and black jeans. shinichiro wiped away his tears before cupping your face between his warm calloused palms, a pout forming on your lips as he squished your cheeks slightly. 

“i can’t believe my stargirl is back. woahh, look at that gorgeous face that i missed looking at every day. damn, y/n. i missed it all so much. those pretty doey eyes staring at me while fixed a tire or something, this cute little nose, squishy cheeks and your cute litle lips. fuck, i really missed you, y/n.” he breathed out, leaning forwards to place a loving kiss on your cheeks, a small tint of pink now painting them. 

“you’re still smooth with your words, sano. you’re making me feel like i’m in high school all over again.” you giggled, ruffling his hair as he chuckled. 

“hey, tell you what. i’ll leave the shop early today so that we could have dinner together with mikey and emma. mikey will most likely have a stroke, but i can’t blame him, he missed you so much for the past five years. in the meantime, i’ll have your car fixed up by tomorrow morning.” shinichiro smiled, looking at you with the most gentle eyes known to mankind. it set your soul on fire, to have a man look at you with such love and adoration. it was like you never left, he never changed, always being as generous as he could. 

“sounds like a plan, i’ll see you at dinner then.” you excitedly beamed, going on your tippy-toes to press a soft kiss on his cheek. he stood there, awe struck as he looked at you with hearts in his eyes. 

you waved him goodbye before leaving the small room as you walked to the front of the shop. you pulled the glass doors to exit the shop, seeing your car parked on the side, you driver attentively watching the blonde who was examining the condition of your car’s engine. 

“miss y/n!” your driver called out. inupi now redirected his attention to you as you walked closer to them. 

“thanks for getting my car here, you could go home for today.” you dismissed the driver as he thanked you before leaving. 

“you famous around here or something, miss y/n?” inupi asked, slightly mocking you which you found to be quite amusing. 

“uhm, something like that. i’m an actress.” you replied, seeing him cock an eyebrow. 

“that’s pretty cool, never knew shin had famous people on his friends list.” he mumbled to himself, trying to connect some of the cables that were latched onto your engine. 

“i’m not as famous as angelina jolie or something. still pretty much a rookie, so i have a long way to go.” you added on, trying to not come off as an arogant person.

“i see, well, i’ll be sure to search you up later on and watch some of your movies for sure.” inupi chirped, making you laugh as you both waved each other goodbye before you went your own separate way. 

...

the clock struck eight in the evening and you just finished spraying on some perfume. it was a simple dinner at the sano’s, just like the olden times, so you decided to keep it simple and casual with a t-shirt and a pair of jeans. 

you made sure to grab the three gift bags that you prepared with care all evening, your room now a huge mess from how messily you rummaged through your luggage to pull out these presents. 

“y/n, give this to shin for me, please.” your mom gave you a foil pan that you knew was filled with her famous tirimisu. 

“will do, ma’am. i’ll see you later, mom.” you said, opening the door before closing it behind you, deciding to walk to shin’s house since it was two short blocks away. 

you arrived shortly, ringing the doorbell as you waited for a couple of seconds. the wooden door opened, revealing your best friend who was in a very cheezy apron. 

“y/n! i just finished setting the table, come in.” he scooted to the side, giving you space to get inside. there was a particular smell in the sano residence that made you feel at home, the scent of comfort and memories. 

not a single thing has changed about how his house looks like, it’s exactly the way it looked like five years ago on the night where you last had dinner with them. 

“i brought tirimisu, my mom made it.” you informed him as you walked into the kitchen, nearly bumping into his back. 

“really? damn, how did she know that i’ve been craving for her tirimisu recently.” shin chuckled, taking the foil pan from your hands to put it in the fridge. 

“where’s mikey and emma?” you looked around, eyes scanning the living room but the both of them are nowhere to be found. 

“emma’s at hina’s house and mikey is at one of his toman meetings. but, i called them both a few minutes ago, they’re on their way.” he answered while reaching his hands back to untie the knot of the apron. you saw his eyebrow furrow as he ‘tsked’ in annoyance, he accidentally pulled the wrong string and tightened the knot. you saw him struggling, going behind him to offer your help. 

“here, let me help.” your hands brushed against his, a small electrical current running between the brief touch, as you soft fingers began to untie the knot. 

for absolute no reason at all, this strong urge to hug the man in front of you overwhelmed you. you couldn’t register nor process why.

was it because he smelled like home? how his touches bandaged all the wounds littered on your body? his voice like some kind of drug to calm down your nerves? 

without thinking twice, you closed the distance between both of your bodies. you wrapped your arms tightly against his waist, snuggling against the muscular clothed surface of your back as you breathed him in. 

shinichiro froze on the spot, not knowing how to react at all. it’s been five years, and it felt like time was going a little too slow for him. all those days where he stayed awake late at night, thinking about how you were doing and why you didn’t talk to him in any form of communication. 

for the longest, he thought that maybe you forgot about him. shinichiro wasn’t a hard man to read, in fact, he was like an open-book to be honest. there’s no way that you could miss the flirty comments, or how his cheeks and the tips of his ears would go red when he got flustered, how he dressed extra nice when you both would go out to eat after school and even much smaller actions. 

making sure to have you walk on the sidewalk where you weren’t near the road, holding your hand while crossing and looking both ways for you when you were too busy reading the upcoming play’s script, making sure to remind you to eat and drink water, and just to breathe and relax. 

you were just a little too slow to realize. 

shinichiro remembered breaking his own heart with the mere thought of you getting into a relationship with another man. of course, he would support you and cheer you on no matter what. but, it would be hard to always give you a bittersweet smile and pretend that everything was okay. 

he saw the way you helped him raise his siblings, envisioning a life where the two of you would date, get married and start a family. whenever he had a bad day, dreaming about that would instantly make him smile. 

he only wished that it was reality. 

“i’ll never leave you again shin, i’m so sorry for not calling or texting. when i came back to japan and saw you for the first time in five years, i felt like a piece of me was finally restored. god, i can’t explain to you how much i missed you and how much i yearned for you. you’re home for me, shin.” your voice came out a muffles as your embrace tightened a little with each word, not wanting to ever let go of him. 

“i’m so happy you didn’t forget me, y/n. i was so scared to lose you, holding onto the little bits of hope left inside my heart and mind that one day you’d come back and surprise me in my shop. but back then, it was only a scenario that i would think of before going to sleep.” shinichiro turned around, stroking your hair before leaning down to plant a soft kiss on your forehead. 

the little moment you both share would soon be interrupted as a series of doorbells rang. 

“it’s them! you could hide in my room, y/n. go, go, go!” he exclaimed, pushing you towards the stairs in a hurry. he waited for your footsteps to reach all the way to the top, hearing the sound of his door closing before heading to open the door. 

“what took you so long, shin? i thought i was gonna die from hunger.” mikey complained the second his older brother opened the door, quickly entering the house as he kicked his shoes off. 

“this little brat made me wait ten minutes in front of that hina girl’s house because of some silly fashion show they were having in her room.” grandpa sano mumbled under his breath as he followed in after mikey. 

“any complaints from you, emma?” shinichiro chuckled, but the blonde simply shook her head. 

“i’m not overdramatical like them, i had a pretty good day. what about you, shin?” she asked as she was the last one to come inside, shinichiro locking the door behind as emma sat on the couch to open her shoes. 

“that’s good to hear. my day was pretty okay, a little busy at the shop.” he smiled, bending down to help unbuckle her heels. 

in the span of just a few minutes, all three of the sanos that just arrived home freshened up and were ready to dine in together to the freshly home-cooked meal prepared by the elder sano sibling. 

you crept up behind a wall, seeing all of them slowly being seated, mikey being the one faced away from you. 

“if only y/n was here then you wouldn’t have been so lonely all the time, big bro. she needs to come back soon, i still miss her. she probably forgot about us.” mikey sadly said, lowering his gaze towards his food as he suddenly felt a loss of his appetite when he glanced at the empty space between him and shinichiro where you would sit during meals. 

your heart shattered to pieces when hearing his words, no longer being able to hide away. you tip-toed towards him, your presence catching emma and grandpa sano’s attention as they both looked at you with wide eyes. 

emma was nearly ready to scream but you quickly place a finger on your lips to signal her to not make a sound. 

“what’s the matter? you seem like you saw a ghost, emma.” mikey laughed. 

you covered his eyes, the pair of chopsticks in his hands dropping as he tried to take your hands off of his face. 

“the hell?! emma, is this one of your stupid friends from school again?? listen here, i’m not hanging out with you after school alright!” the blonde said through gritted teeth, making you bite back a laugh. 

you slowly release you hand as you craned down you face to meet his eyes. 

“not even me, ‘jiro?” you said and he stared at you blankly. 

“i think i’m going nuts.” mikey stammered out. you gave him a warm smile before pulling him into your chest. 

it took him a minute to finally realize that it was really you. 

“y/n? OH MY GOD, Y/N!!” he screamed on the top of his lungs, nearly popping your ear drums before pulling you into a hug that made it difficult to breathe. 

“you grew up so much, little sano. oh my, look at your hair!!” you squealed while ruffling the long blonde locks, the boy in your arms sobbing as he refused to let you go. 

“i missed you so much, y/n. you big fat jerk, how dare you not call us!! i waited every birthday for you to wish me, trying to predict a lucky day that would come where you would return.” mikey hiccuped as you rubbed your hand on his back, trying to soothe him as you apologized.

shinichiro looked at you lovingly, his eyes sparkling at how tenderly you treated his siblings. the way you gently caressed mikey’s hair while patting emma’s back as she sobbed into you chest. 

you were perfect. 

you’ll always be his stargirl, shining brightly even through his darkest times. 

he never realized how madly in love he was with you, not until you were thousands of miles away. shinichiro still sometimes felt that feeling of his heart sinking at the thought of you never coming back. 

but you did and he never wanted to let you go again. 

[zenathezee]

Being able to go to my boss and say "the difference between me happy to work here until I go to grad school and wanting to quit everyday is this one thing" and have her be like yeah that's fair is SO POWERFUL

[diaphragmjellyfish]

Robby NSFW Alphabet

not my gif

A: Aftercare

Robby’s aftercare is ON POINT. He’s a huge cuddler and loves to have the chance to take care of someone who really appreciates it and takes care of him in return. He will get a soft, damp cloth and clean you off before pulling you onto his chest and wrapping you both up in tons of blankets. He likes to pet your hair while you fall asleep, and hold you so that no one can hurt you while you’re in such a vulnerable state. He knows, realistically, that no one is gonna jump out of the closet and attack you, but it makes him feel needed. 

B: Body Part

His favorite body part of yours is your hands. He loves holding them up next to his and comparing, he loves holding your hand, and he loves when your hand is wrapped around his cock while y’all are in private. He can’t help but look at your left hand and picture a pretty ring on that finger, imagining the beautiful future he wants to have with you. His favorite body part of his is his butt. The boy works out, and he knows how much you like it. He honestly never noticed his butt before, whether it was nice or not, until you started pointing it out, and now he walks around in leggings just to get your attention!

C: Cum

He likes to cum in your mouth. Blowjobs make him feel like he’s in heaven, and when you swallow, it makes Robby feel like you’re accepting him and worshipping him like no one ever has before. He also likes to finish inside you (wrap it up) because of how intimate it is. Not part of the prompt, but he loves to make you sit on his face and cum all over his mouth, dirty boy. 

D: Dirty Secret

Robby has always wanted to try more public sex. The thought of getting caught riles him to no end, and he gets so turned on by the idea of holding his hand over your mouth in a janitor’s closet so people walking past don’t hear your moans. If you wanted to try it, y’all would start small, like your backyard, and work your way up, but if you weren;t into it, that’s fine with him too. 

E: Experience

He’s decently experienced. Robby had a one night stand or two before he met Mr. Larusso, when he hung out with those hooligans, but it never meant anything. With you, it’s his first time doing it with feelings involved, and he was blown away by how much better it was that way. He was experienced enough to not bust in T-2 minutes, but he still had a lot to learn about taking his time and making sure you both enjoyed it. With the other girls, it was always about doing it to impress his friends so he never thought much about how it felt, for him or her. You have to teach him that porn isn’t realistic, and that it takes time to feel good. He’s a fast learner though. 

F: Favorite Position

He loves a good 69, lying down or standing ;) bc he’s strong like that. He also likes taking you from behind while he holds you up against him by your neck, and his other hand playing with your nipples or clit. Add a mirror, and you have the hottest sex either of you had ever had. 

G: Goofy

He can be goofy during foreplay or aftercare, but Robby likes to keep it more intimate and serious during actual sex. He wants you to know that he takes you seriously, and thinks that you guys are goofy all the time, so he wants sex to be loving and heartfelt. Drunk sex can be goofy, but most of the time, he keeps it mature. 

H: Hair

He will shave it off every once in a while and let it get stubbly for a couple weeks, then shave again. Robby HATES ingrown hairs, so he doesn’t like to shave every day, but he thinks just trimming makes it look sloppy. He settles for shaving every couple weeks. He literally doesn’t even notice when you don’t shave, so obviously he doesn’t care about that. Like he’s so caught up in the moment that you could put a little blue wig down there and he wouldn’t notice. 

I: Intimacy

So growing up, Robby never really had people that cared a lot about him. Because of this, he lives for intimate moments. Just you guys lying on his bed playing with each other’s hair makes him swoon. He’s a romantic guy, and would definitely go all out with flower petals, candles, champagne, and bubble baths if it were a special occasion. He wants you to know that he loves you, and wants to make sure you know how much he loves you. 10/10 romance. 

J: Jack off 

He did it a lot before he met you, but now he prefers you. He really doesn’t feel the need to jack off because you guys are together so often. If he starts thinking about you in the shower or something, maybe he would, but he’d rather just text you to come over. 

K: Kink

So Robby is a switch. When he’s feeling more dominant, he loves to spank you with his hands, a paddle, or his karate belt. He gets off on the fact that you trust him so much to hold your pleasure and pain in his hands. He would never go too far, but he loves how wet you get after a light spanking. When Robby is more sub, he likes when you boss him around. Telling him how exactly to pleasure you, pulling his face further into your core. Making him get on his knees and watch as you pleasured yourself. He worships you. 

L: Location

At first, a bed. But after you guys have sex on a beach at night one time, he realizes that he wants to try tons of different locations. Just the possibilities of how he can position you, someone catching you, or someone hearing how good he makes you feel, really gets him going. His favorite so far was in an empty stairwell at a fancy resort that Sam invited you both to. 

M: Motivation

So like Hawk and Miguel, Robby is a teenage boy! He’s horny all day, every day. He loves seeing you in workout clothes, seeing other guys hit on you and then shrink away when they realize you’re his, teaching you karate, and watching you put your hair up. It reminds him of… certain things. 

N: No

He would never ever let someone else join you guys. Male, female, or other, he hates the idea of someone putting their hands on you in that way, and knows you would feel the same about him. Robby thinks you guys have such a perfect chemistry going, so why would you want to ruin that with another person? It would just be awkward and clumsy, and Robby does NOT like to share. 

O: Oral

So like I said earlier, he thinks porn is accurate when y’all first start having sex. He would go down on you for like 30 seconds, barely using any pressure or suction, and would then be confused as to why you weren’t finishing. He sat you down one day and talked to you about it, because he was scared you just weren’t attracted to him or something. When you told him that you needed more than what he was doing, he made you teach him right then and there. He spent a good hour and a half going down on you, making you tell him what was good and what wasn’t, learning how to actually give GOOD head, and now he’s pretty much an expert. He takes his time and takes cues from you. You were amazing at head right off the bat, and he’s such a simp for you when you’re between his legs. 

P: Pace

It honestly varies depending on the day and what mood you guys are in. He’s a switch in all respects, so he can be slow and loving, or fast and rough, or a mix of the two. He also loves when you start on top and set the pace, and then he will flip you guys over when you get tired and finish you both off. 

Q: Quickie

He likes a good quickie in those moments when you guys are out and get turned on all of a sudden. Robby likes to take you somewhere a little more private and get you both off, before resuming what you guys were doing and acting like nothing happened. You’ve seen him shake the hand of someone with the same hand that was buried in you 3 minutes before, acting like nothing was out of sorts at all. 

R: Risk

He will try new things if you want to, but is honestly pretty content with how you guys fuck right now. His philosophy is “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” But he’s more than willing to try whatever you want to try. Robby can’t say no to his girl. Sometimes, you guys just sit there and watch porn together, and will see something that looks like fun, so you decide to try it. 

S: Stamina

So I feel redundant for saying this on Miguel and Hawk’s too, but he’s a teenage boy! He can’t go for more than 12 minutes at first. He could go like 5 times in a row, but didn’t last very long. Now, he’s way better. He can last for a solid 30 to 40 minutes if he really wants to, but normally you’re satisfied before that and he can let himself finish. 

T: Toy

Robby loves to try toys on you. When you first told him that you had a vibrator, he immediately asked if he could use it on you. He’s fascinated with how different toys do different things, and he loves studying the difference in your reactions depending on what he’s using. He doesn’t really like toys being used on him though. He thinks it feels weird and he'd rather have your mouth or hand. 

U: Unfair

Robby can be a really bad tease if he’s in the right mood. He would hover his mouth over your pussy, letting you shake and cry before he touches you. He would finger you and bring you right up to the edge, before pulling his hand away and laughing as you almost sob. He likes knowing he has the power to make you writhe like that. 

V: Volume

He’s pretty quiet, to be honest. You had to tell him specifically that you wanted him to be louder in the bedroom. Once you did that, he started to let loose a little bit more, but still isn’t super loud. He would rather listen to you scream his name ;) 

W: Wild Card

He loves shower sex. Too many times have you guys both cum, only for him to carry you into the shower to clean off and eventually start round 2. The water, the soap, the nakedness, he’s a sucker for it. There’s no clean up involved, and he even gets a bathtub mat so you guys don’t slip and hurt yourselves. 

X: X-Ray

I said it before and I’ll say it again! Size! Does! Not! Matter! The g-spot is 3 INCHES IN so if he’s hitting it right it’s fine!!! But Robby is probably a solid 6 inches. 

Y: Yearning

Teenage boy! He could go at the drop of a hat. Robby wants you all the time, he just holds back until you want to as well. Which is also often, I mean look at him!

Z: Zzz

He doesn’t really like to fall asleep right after in case you need something. He makes sure he’s available to get you whatever you need: a snack, water, another blanket, a kiss. Robby also likes to hold you while you sleep, because it makes him feel like he’s doing his duty as your boyfriend and protecting you. 

[be-gay-do-heists]

hello yall :) the holy month of elul started last night, which is typically a time for contemplation, so since it is impossible for me to stop thinking about leverage, i decided to write an essay. hope anyone interested in reading it enjoys, and that it makes at least a little sense!! spoilers for leverage redemption

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Leverage, Judaism, and “Doing the Work”: An Essay for Elul

When it comes to Elul and the approaching High Holidays, Leverage might seem like an odd topic to meditate on.

The TNT crime drama that ran from 2008-2012, and which released a new season this summer following its renewal, centers on a group of found-family thieves who help the victims of corporations and oligarchs (sometimes based on real-world examples), using wacky heists and cons to bring down the rich and powerful. In one episode, the team’s clients want to reclaim their father’s prized Glimt piece that had been stolen in the Shoah and never returned, but aside from this and the throwaway lines and jokes standard for most mainstream television, there’s not a ton textually Jewish about Leverage. However, despite this, I have found that the show has strong resonance among Jewish fans, and lots of potential for analysis along Jewish themes. This tends to focus on one character in particular: the group’s brilliant, pop culture-savvy, and personable hacker, Alec Hardison, played by the phenomenally talented Aldis Hodge.

I can’t remember when or where I first encountered a reading of Hardison as Jewish, but not only is this a somewhat popular interpretation, it doesn’t feel like that much of a leap. In the show itself, Hardison has a couple of the aforementioned throwaway lines that potentially point to him being Jewish, even if they’re only in service of that moment’s grift. It’s hard to point to what exactly makes reading Hardison as Jewish feel so natural. My first guess is the easy way Hardison fits into the traditional paradigms of Jewish masculinity explored by scholars such as Daniel Boyarin (2). Most of the time, the hacker is not portrayed as athletic or physical; he is usually the foil to the team’s more physically-adept characters like fighter Eliot, or thief Parker. Indeed, Hardison’s strength is mental, expressed not only through his computer wizardry but his passions for science, technology, music, popular media, as well as his studious research into whatever scenario the group might come up against. In spite of his self-identification as a “geek,” Hardison is nevertheless confident, emotionally sensitive, and secure in his masculinity. I would argue he is representative of the traditional Jewish masculine ideal, originating in the rabbinic period and solidified in medieval Europe, of the dedicated and thoughtful scholar (3). Another reason for popular readings of Hardison as Jewish may be the desire for more representation of Jews of color. Although mainstream American Jewish institutions are beginning to recognize the incredible diversity of Jews in the United States (4), and popular figures such as Tiffany Haddish are amplifying the experiences of non-white Jews, it is still difficult to find Jews of color represented in popular media. For those eager to see this kind of representation, then, interpreting Hardison, a black man who places himself tangential to Jewishness, in this way is a tempting avenue.

Regardless, all of the above remains fan interpretation, and there was little in the text of the show that seriously tied Judaism into Hardison’s identity. At least, until we got this beautiful speech from Hardison in the very first episode of the renewed show, directed at the character of Harry Wilson, a former corporate lawyer looking to atone for the injustice he was partner to throughout his career:

“In the Jewish faith, repentance, redemption, is a process. You can’t make restitution and then promise to change. You have to change first. Do the work, Harry. Then and only then can you begin to ask for forgiveness. [...] So this… this isn’t the win. It’s the start, Harry.”

I was floored to hear this speech, and thrilled that it explained the reboot’s title, Leverage: Redemption. Although not mentioned by its Hebrew name, teshuvah forms the whole basis for the new season. Teshuvah is the concept of repentance or atonement for the sins one has committed. Stemming from the root shuv/shuva, it carries the literal sense of “return.” In a spiritual context, this usually means a return to G-d, of finding one’s way back to holiness and by extension good favor in the eyes of the Divine. But equally important is restoring one’s relationships with fellow humans by repairing any hurt one has caused over the past year. This is of special significance in the holy month of Elul, leading into Rosh haShanah, the Yamim Noraim, and Yom Kippur, but one can undertake a journey of redemption at any point in time. That teshuvah is a journey is a vital message for Harry to hear; one job, one reparative act isn’t enough to overturn years of being on the wrong side of justice, to his chagrin. As the season progresses, we get to watch his path of teshuvah unfold, with all its frustrations and consequences. Harry grows into his role as a fixer, not only someone who can find jobs and marks for the team, but fixes what he has broken or harmed.

So why was Hardison the one to make this speech?

I do maintain that it does provide a stronger textual basis for reading Hardison as Jewish by implication (though the brief on-screen explanation for why he knows about teshuvah, that his foster-parent Nana raised a multi-faith household, is important in its own merit, and meshes well with his character traits of empathy and understanding for diverse experiences). However, beyond this, Hardison isn’t exactly an archetypical model for teshuvah. In the original series, he was the youngest character of the main ensemble, a hacking prodigy in the start of his adult career, with few mistakes or slights against others under his belt. In one flashback we see that his possibly first crime was stealing from the Bank of Iceland to pay off his Nana’s medical bills, and that his other early hacking exploits were in the service of fulfilling personal desires, with only those who could afford to pay the bill as targets. Indeed, in the middle of his speech, Hardison points to Eliot, the character with the most violent and gritty past who views his work with the Leverage team as atonement, for a prime example of ongoing teshuvah. So while no one is perfect and everyone has a reason for doing teshuvah, this question of why Hardison is the one to give this series-defining speech inspired me to look at his character choices and behavior, and see how they resonate with a different but interrelated Jewish principle, that of tikkun olam. 

Tikkun olam is literally translated as “repairing the world,” and can take many different forms, such as protecting the rights of vulnerable people in society, or giving tzedakah (5). In modern times, tikkun olam is often the rallying cry for Jewish social activists, particularly among environmentalists for whom literally restoring the health of the natural world is the key goal. Teshuvah and tikkun olam are intertwined (the former is the latter performed at an interpersonal level) and both hold a sense of fixing or repairing, but tikkun olam really revolves around a person feeling called to address an injustice that they may have not had a personal hand in creating. Hardison’s sense of a universal scale of justice which he has the power to help right on a global level and his newfound drive to do humanitarian work, picked up sometime after the end of the original series, make tikkun olam a central value for his character. This is why we get this nice bit of dialogue from Eliot to Hardison in the second episode of the reboot, when the latter’s outside efforts to organize international aid start distracting him from his work with the team: “Is [humanitarian work] a side gig? In our line of work, you’re one of the best. But in that line of work… you’re the only one, man.” The character who most exemplifies teshuvah reminds Hardison of his amazing ability to effect change for the better on a huge stage, to do some effective tikkun olam. It’s this acknowledgement of where Hardison can do the most good that prompts the character’s absence for the remainder of the episodes released thus far, turning his side gig into his main gig.

With this in mind, it will be interesting to see where Hardison’s arc for this season goes. Separated from the rest of the team, the hacker still has remarkable power to change the world, because it is, after all, the “age of the geek.” However, he is still one person. For all that both teshuvah and tikkun olam are individual responsibilities and require individual decision-making and effort, the latter especially relies on collective work to actually make things happen. Hardison leaving is better than trying to do humanitarian work and Leverage at the same time, but there’s only so long he can be the “only one” in the field before burning out. I’m reminded of one of the most famous (for good reason) maxims in Judaism:

It is not your duty to finish the work, but neither are you free to neglect it. (6)

Elul is traditionally a time for introspection and heeding the calls to repentance. After a year where it’s never been easier to feel powerless and drained by everything going on around us, I think it’s worth taking the time to examine what kind of work we are capable of in our own lives. Maybe it’s fixing the very recent and tangible hurts we’ve left behind, like Harry. Maybe it’s the little changes for the better that we make every day, motivated by our sense of responsibility, like Eliot. And maybe it’s the grueling challenge of major social change, like Hardison. And if any of this work gets too much, who can we fall back on for support and healing? Determining what needs repair, working on our own scale and where our efforts are most helpful, and thereby contributing to justice in realistic ways means that we can start the new year fresh, having contemplated in holiday fashion how we can be better agents in the world.

Shana tovah u’metukah and ketivah tovah to all (7), and may the work we do in the coming year be for good!

------

(1) Disclaimer: everybody’s fandom experiences are different, and this is just what I’ve picked up on in my short time watching and enjoying this show with others.

(2) See, for example, the introduction and first chapter of Boyarin’s book Unheroic Conduct: The Rise of Heterosexuality and the Invention of the Jewish Man (I especially recommend at least this portion if you are interested in queer theory and Judaic studies). There he explores the development of Jewish masculinity in direct opposition to Christian masculine standards.

(3) I might even go so far as to place Hardison well within the Jewish masculine ideal of Edelkayt, gentle and studious nobility (although I would hesitate to call him timid, another trait associated with Edelkayt). Boyarin explains that this scholarly, non-athletic model of man did not carry negative associations in the historical Jewish mindset, but was rather the height of attractiveness (Boyarin, 2, 51).

(4) Jews of color make up 20% of American Jews, according to statistics from Be’chol Lashon, and this number is projected to increase as American demographics continue to change: https://globaljews.org/about/mission/. 

(5) Tzedakah is commonly known as righteous charity. According to traditional authority Maimonides, it should be given anonymously and without embarrassment to the person in need, generous, and designed to help the recipient become self-sufficient.

(6) Rabbi Tarfon, Pirkei Avot, 2:16

(7) “A good and sweet year” and “a good inscription [in the Book of Life]”

[xoxo-teddybear]

Just Stay - Bakugou Katsuki - pt.2

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, cursing

Summary: it’s been almost 2 years since the breakup and Bakugou refuses to move. No matter how many times people tell him it’s time, he ignores them because he knows he’ll run into you again. And he was right all along.

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Pt.1 Pt.2 

Almost 2 years. About 24 months. Around 104 weeks, 730 days, 17520 hours, or 63,072,000 seconds. And every second of everyday, you run through Bakugou’s mind.

Memories of the two of you always pass through him and he always smile at the good ones. But as time went on, he realized he really wasn’t the same person anymore. Especially not to Y/N. In the beginning, he was hopelessly devoted to you and he craved to be around you. He always wanted what was best for you until he realized in the end he grew selfish. He stopped caring about your needs, neglecting you, and just assumed you’d stay because you still loved him the same way he did you. He was wrong though, and the horrible day of your split arrived.

After you left his house that day, Bakugou remained in the same place for hours. He stood there and cried with his back facing the front door, and when his legs grew tired, he fell to the ground and continued to cry.

Everybody thought he would move on but he didn’t. He still held onto hope. So for 2 years, Bakugou worked to fix himself just for you. He went to therapy to work on his excessive anger, he stopped going out as much with his friends and worked around the house to improve his home skills to help you out when you would return, and he even went as far as to get a lil dog for himself to learn to be a little more loving and compassionate.

His name was Bomber. He was a Pomeranian.

During those 2 years..it’s like you disappeared. Bakugou, and none of your friends, saw sight or heard word of you. Some people thought you moved, some thought the worst had possibly happened. But Bakugou was still going strong. If something was wrong, he would’ve felt it in his heart, but his hope was still going strong. He knew you were out there.

And he was right. For the past 2 years you’ve lived...everywhere! You never stayed in one place for too long in fear of someone from your life may get word of you being around. You’ve lived in the beautiful islands of the Caribbean all the way to the blissful cities in Paris. You’ve been all around the world and you’ve enjoyed all the sights, but you were getting tired of not really having friends and spending so much money. You missed Japan. The food, the culture, the songs, the celebration. The people. And so you decided it was time for you to head back.

You moved back home about a month ago and you made sure none of your old friends would hear about you. You wanted to settle for a little bit before interacting with the people who were a huge part of your old life and you enjoyed the quite peaceful nature. After some time, you decided it was okay to meet up with your old friends, but instead of going out and looking for them, you waited to see what destiny brought you, and now the moment has come.

You sat in the old park you used to love being in when you lived in Japan. It was spring time and the cherry blossoms were out as they covered the trail you made for yourself when you came here. In the past, you found a hidden area of the park forest that seemed...magical. There was a crystal blue lake that were filled with Lilly pads, lotuses, and koi fish. The sunlight hit perfectly on the patch of land, and dusted it with a golden honey scheme. The cherry blossom trees surrounded the place along with tall pines that reached the clouds. The cute little creatures that lived in the secluded area included bunnies, fawns, beautiful birds, and adorable foxes.

It’s been so long since you’ve been here. The last time you even stepped foot into this park was when you were with..Bakugou. But even then, the last time you went with him was about 4 months before your breakup. He was the only person you ever told about this spot and you both had so many memories here. You weren’t gonna lie, you missed him, but you didn’t know who he was now. As the 2 years past, Bakugou has gone through your mind a couple times, and you smiled towards the sky as you wondered what he’s like nowadays. If he’s any different than the last time you saw him. You really wished nothing but the best for the man you love.

Every once in awhile, Bakugou would step into the hidden sanctuary that Y/N showed him. He enjoyed going there to get away from his reality and thoughts of Y/N always came to him when he entered that special place. This time, his imagination seemed really strong because he felt like he was staring at the real deal.

He looked ahead and leaning against the tallest cherry tree was the beautiful goddess herself, Y/N L/N. She held her cool expression as she held a cute little bunny and her golden jewelry sparkled in the sunlight that hit her body perfectly. She truly did look like a goddess.

Bakugou smiled as he saw you, but he quickly shook it off as he realized there was no way it was possible. He then chose to walk to the spot, hoping that the image of you would just disappear, but he also hoped that you were real. He snuck up on you from behind but you were smarter than that. Once he got close enough you walked to the other side of the tree, out of his line of vision and went into stealth mode as you quickly used your quirk to be seated on a high branch. Bakugou saw you walk and disappear so he sighed as he “realized” you were just his imagination. However, when he finally settled and looked out beyond the valley, you jumped down to surprise him. You hopped off the branch, grabbed Bakugou and spun you both around so that you were laying against the tree and he was facing you.

“Long time no see, Bakugou,” you said with a little break in your voice as you spoke with such a “cool girl tone.” You held a sassy smile as you stared at him with all the confidence radiating off your body. Bakugou just looked at you in shock. His mouth hung open as his wide eyes traveled all around you to make sure you were real. He shook a little as he stared at you and soon his tears began to pool at his eyes.

“Hey, hey, hey. You don’t gotta cry, it’s okay,” you said with a concerned smile. You wiped a stray tear that fell from his ruby eyes with your thumb and you felt heat rise to his cheeks as he leaned into your palm. “....Bakugou?....Are you- woah!”

Without warning, he quickly grabbed you and pulled you in by the waist to give you a hug. He held you tight as you were shocked but you smiled against his chest and held him too. He cried on your shoulder and after some time he finally spoke.

“I’ve missed you so much Y/N.”

“.....I’ve missed you too Katsuki.”

—

“Where have you been?” He asked as you both were seated on the grass. You and Bakugou both held onto each other for awhile as Bakugou cried his heart out like a big baby. You finally settled him and you both were sitting next to each other laying against the tree as you both sat on the grass.

“I’ve been everywhere!” You laughed out, “I’ve went to the states and hung out in L.A and Hawaii, took some time in New York and hung out in Florida. I then went to the Caribbean and partied in the Dominican Republic, and I even traveled to Europe and stayed in Paris for a bit. I’ve been all over the world traveling and finding me again.”

“You seem happy about that,” Bakugou said as he looked at you with loving eyes and a small smile that only you could ever bring out.

“I am. Ever since...um...you know...I’ve been a little lost. I lost myself and I missed the old me. My trips and alone time brought out the old me again and I’ve been feeling so much more alive,” you sighed as you settled, “but I’ve missed my roots. I’ve missed Japan and the people.....I’ve missed you too Katsuki.” You said with kind eyes as you smiled at him causing him to blush immensely.

You both remained silent as you guys enjoyed the sounds of spring. You felt the breeze blow in your hair as the warm sun comforted you. Soon, you felt Bakugou’s hand slowly touch yours. You knew he was scared to go and do anything else, but you openly welcomed his touch and he clearly became less tense.

“So...what have you been up to while I was away?” You calmly asked. You noticed Bakugou’s hesitation and deep breath before he spoke.

“I’ve been....I’ve been trying to better myself for you.” Your brows raised and eyes opened up a little wider. For the past 2 years, he’s been trying to better himself...just for you. “I’ve gone to therapy for my anger, stop going out as much, learned to do more around the house...even got a little dog to learn to be a little more compassionate.”

“Ouu! What kind?” You excitedly asked. He chuckled at your cute aura and answered your question.

“Cute little Pomeranian named bomber,” he admitted.

“No way! Cuteeee!” You squealed and Bakugou just laughed at you once again. How cute. As you thought about everything he said, your smile dropped a little into a little lip curl. A silence came over the two of you before you spoke again.

“You...you did all that for me?”

“Mhm. I wanna prove to you that I can change. That I have changed. ....I’m not telling you this to get you to come back to me..I want you to come on your own choice but I want you to know if you do decide to come back, that I’ve become better.” He explained.

You smiled and hummed to yourself in happiness. Your cheeks dusted with warmth as you smiled so much it hurt.

“Why don’t you show me how much you’ve changed Katsuki?” You offered.

“What?”

“Hehe, let’s start over. I don’t know if you’re still down for anything...but I’ve missed you over the past 2 years and I remember you saying that if a certain ‘goddess’ wanted to come back..you’d be waiting with open arms...” you looked at him and he gave an open smile that held more disbelief and happiness than excitement.

“Can we try again Suki?” You quietly asked, but Bakugou stood and picked you up. He pulled you up by your arms and pulled you even higher which caused you to jump and wrap your legs around him. You laughed out in excitement as he held you like that and rested his head in the crook of your neck.

“I should be on my hands and knees asking you that, princess.” He softly said with a broken voice but it was clear he was letting out tears of joy. You wrapped your arms around his neck even tighter as his hold on you never faltered. He started sniffling and you pulled him out of your neck as you wiped his tears.

“Suki! Stop crying,” you giggled, “this is supposed to be a happen moment.”

“Shut up! I don’t cry!” He said with a flushed face as he looked to the side but still holding you. You raised your brow at him and he only nervously laughed as he placed you down. He stuck out his hand for you to grab onto but you placed it down and wrapped your arms around his. You pecked his cheek and leaned on him as he smiled down at you. This was the moment he’s been waiting for. His princess finally came back to him. Everyone told him to move on but he knew better. If he did, he would’ve never been here right now with you again. And this time, he would make sure you’d stay.

“Suki?”

“Yes princess?”

“.......Can we go see Bomber?”

“Heh...whatever your heart desires.”

A/N: STAWWWPPP YALL THIS WAS SO BAD BUT IT WAS SO RUSHED! IM TRYNA HURRY CUZ I HAVE ANOTHER PART 2 TO WORK ON, I HAVE TO START ON THE NEXT PART OF MY SERIES AND I HAVE SO MUCH WORK TO DOOOOO😭😭😭 IM SO PISSED AT MYSELF BRO THIS COULDVE BEEN SO MUCH BETTER!!! BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOYED WHATEVER U COULD CUBS! See u next time! 😭💗🧸

[friendlyneighborhoodamara]

(Edited on July 23, 2021)

So. Luz Noceda.

Quite possibly one of the best written protagonists in a Disney animated show, and easily one of my favorite protagonists in fiction.

Admittedly, if you know me, you may not be surprised I like her this much. I love kindhearted protagonists who are extremely energetic, unorthodox, goofy and proactive, and this describes Luz in spades. Even at her lowest points, she has a never-give-up attitude that’s just so endearing to me. In fact, I’ve described her as a female shonen protagonist to many of my friends in the past, and it’s not uncommon for people to compare Luz to Mabel (while she is also a rather complicated character I adore, this comparison is faulty for reasons I’ll get into shortly.)

If this was all there was to Luz—a warmhearted, generous dork who goes to any lengths to help the people she loves—I’d be satisfied. That relatively short, shallow description describes Goku almost to a T, and I absolutely love Goku, inside and out.

However, the writing staff of The Owl House, thankfully, chose to go the extra mile with Luz and flesh her out far beyond her superficial confines.

While all are extroverted, sweet girls, Luz differs from similar characters like Mabel Pines, Anne Boonchuy and Star Butterfly due to her far lower status on the social ladder: if Camila is to be believed, Luz - prior to entering the Boiling Isles - doesn’t have a single friend. Having a protagonist who is a disliked underdog with low self-esteem is far from new, especially in kids’ media. In some cases, it almost feels like a prerequisite to have the character be the victim of petty school bullies, even when they’re a skater punk high schooler played by a 27-year-old Andrew Garfield. However, in Luz’s case, her past as a teenage outcast (and implied history of bullying), her neurodivergence, and her subsequent retreat into fantasy as an escape informs every single facet of her characterization and cannot be stripped away from her without making her far less interesting.

How so?

Well, for starters, Luz is seen as frustrating or annoying by a lot of people, even the friends she made in the demon realm. In Season 1, even after the lesson she learns in the second episode, she is obsessed with living out her fantasy of being a fantasy hero just like the Good Witch Azura. This is a direct result of her retreating into fantasy and using it as a crutch to get through life. She tries to befriend her rival Amity the same way Azura did with her rival, tries to whip Willow and Gus into an all-star sports team using nothing but her own gumption, and is quick to accept any challenge that comes her way. This, understandably, does not endear her to other people.

Furthermore, as a result of her ostracization in the human realm (the great state of Connecticut, as we learn in the latest episode!), Luz, subtly, sees herself as a burden. This is why she almost never defends herself when people attack her, fairly or not. When Amity, enraged because Lilith humiliated her in her duel with Luz, demands Luz admit to not being a real witch, she acquiesces, despite having no real reason to. Even after she’s become Amity’s friend (and, unknowingly, her crush), even after Amity risked her own job to help her … Luz assumes that Amity hates her because she got fired from the library trying to help Luz … when Amity was the one who insisted they keep looking. Likewise, when the detention kids accuse her of being stuck-up, Luz accepts the rejection without a word of complaint, even though their accusation is based on incomplete information. And probably most heartbreakingly, at the start of Season 2, Luz calls herself a burden on Eda. After bringing so much life to this crusty old witch’s life, to the point of not only saving her from execution but playing a huge role in her reconnecting with her estranged sister, because of the way she’s been treated for much of her life, Luz can only imagine that Eda dreads her presence.

In short, Luz (1) blunders through many of her social interactions, often leading to negative first impressions, (2) takes those blunders on the chin and assumes they’re her fault even when they aren’t necessarily, and both those (3) flaws flow naturally from her backstory. That’s rather solid character writing that a lot of creators for children’s shows take for granted. Luz isn’t determined to fix what’s wrong just because; she’s determined to fix what’s wrong because, often, she believes that she is responsible for whatever has gone wrong. It’s a more realistic, and rather sad, look at a hero, compared to most Disney properties.

But, in my eyes, what makes this all work like gangbusters is how the other characters treat Luz.

Yes, even her friends and family can be annoyed by some of her more eccentric behavior. They acknowledge when she screws up and hold her accountable for those screw ups. But, for the first time in her life, someone (besides Camila, the real MVP) is giving her the unconditional love she deserves. Eda’s response to Luz saying she doesn’t want to be a burden, Amity saving Luz from Odalia and defying her mother for the first time, hell, even the Golden Guard seems to legitimately bond with Luz in their one episode together.

Given Luz’s status as a neurodivergent girl, as an autistic fan of this show, I can only imagine how comforting a lesson that is for the neurodivergent kids watching this: “Even if people don’t value you, even if you legitimately make mistakes, you still deserve unconditional love. You have value, damn what other people say.” Disney may be a shitty, evil corporation, but the Owl House crew really created something special, something richer than the average Disney cartoon, and that puts a smile on my face.

In short, you’re doing great sweetie. :)