#I started watching it recently with my mom
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hey queen! Could you do a angst of Pau cubarsi? Pau and reader having an argument before going to his family gathering. Pau’s sister noticed that reader is quite upset and talks with Pau about it. When they return home, they’ll talk about it and everything! 🫶🏼
Coming clean — Pau Cubarsí.
Pairing: Pau Cubarsí x Fem!Reader
Summary: An unresolved argument with Pau had ruined your whole night. Luckily for you, Irene is right there to help you get Pau to come clean.
Word count: 1.17k
Disclaimer/s: arguing , angst to resolved ending.
A/N: it’s 3:45 am and i can’t sleep so here is this! + hi Bea! how about you try to end a fucking post w out it ending in a kiss???🤦♀️
The car ride to Pau’s parent’s house was silent. No music, no talking, just pure and tense, silence. The lingering anger from the argument that had only happened ten minutes ago was still fresh.
Even when you arrived, at least a foot apart, you still hadn’t talked. You separated from each other instantly; Pau finding his cousins and you wandering around aimlessly.
Irene watched as you arrived, she could sense that something was off when instead of finding her or her parents, you milled around the food table.
She pushed off the counter she was leaning against and made her way towards you. When Irene called out your name, you plopped a grape into your mouth before turning to face her with a forced smile.
“Irene! Hi!” Your expression falters when you see the way she was looking at you—pity. “What?”
“Let’s go take a walk, yeah?”
Your eyes dart to Pau, who was busy conversing with his cousins. “Okay, yeah. Where to?”
Looking around, the girl points to the back door. “My mom’s flowers started to bloom, want to take a look?” Subtle. Very, very subtle, Irene.
Lips pulling into a thin line, you nod. Irene spins on her heels and marches her way towards the door. You pass Pau, but he doesn’t bother looking in your direction, though you knew he saw you by the tick of his jaw.
Trying not to scoff, you take a deep breath and follow Irene out the door. The spring air hits you comfortingly and the view of Mrs.Cubarsí’s flower garden brings a genuine smile to your face.
“It’s really improved since the last time I was here.” You comment, bending down to sniff one of the vibrant flowers.
Irene hums in agreement. “So, what happened with you and Pau?” When your head snaps in her direction, she chuckles. “Sorry, I just noticed you two were unusually distant and you looked upset.”
You let out a quiet, “oh!” Before you continue. “We argued. It’s a communication problem.” You wave your hand as if to dismiss the problem, but a butter taste lingers on your tongue.
“Okay… tell me about it? Pau is usually an open book, or at least, he used to be.”
You snort at the last part. “Used to be, yeah. Not anymore. For some reason, he’s been holding things back recently, and oh! Yesterday, I went to hold his hand and he—well, he pushed his hand back into his pocket.” You point at the house, though not directly to wherever Pau probably was. “Him avoiding affection? Not normal.”
Irene’s forehead creases in confusion. Pau had never, not once, refused to show you affection. In fact, he was always seeking it out. “Okay, yeah, weird. What did he say when you tried to talk to him?”
You couldn’t help but scoff, “he said that I was ‘reading too much into things’ and that I was, ‘being dramatic’. I’m staring to think—“ Your mouth clamps shut, you couldn’t say that.
Giving you a look, Irene urges you to continue. “Think..?”
“That he’s..” You run your hand over your mouth, “that maybe he’s falling out of love. It’s stupid, I know, but I can’t help but assume, y’know?”
Frowning, Irene nods in understanding. “He loves you, i’m sure of it. He’s just being difficult. Maybe you two should leave early, talk it out?” She pauses, “or I can give him a talking to.”
Your eyes widen, “no! No. Do not talk to him, i’ll figure it out. Just.. need to figure out what to say first.”
“Let’s go back to the party and you contemplate while we stuff our faces, perhaps?”
“That sounds like a brilliant idea.”
When the gathering was over and Pau was driving you back home, you play with the hem of your skirt. “Pau?” You speak quietly, not sparing him a glance.
Pau turns in your direction momentarily, offering you a short, “hm?”
“Can we talk.. please?”
No matter how upset, or annoyed Pau maybe be, he couldn’t resist the pleading tone in your voice. “I guess.” He answers, “what do you want to talk about?”
“Why you’re upset with me. I mean, before our argument. Clearly I did something to hurt you, or maybe you just..” Your voice fades into nothing, scared to speak.
“Just what?” He doesn’t comment on the parts before that, so you know you definitely did something wrong.
You pick at the lace harder, “I know it’s probably me reaching, but, I just thought that maybe you are like—“ You were tripping over words, too embarrassed to speak them out loud. Forcing yourself to come clean, you take a breath, “maybe you were falling out of love.”
The car lurches to a halt, right at a red light. Pau’s head whips in your direction, “what? No! Jesus, baby, no! Not that! I love you, I do.”
His words of reassurance made you feel a sense of relief, but still, your theories about upsetting him were only becoming easier to believe. “I love you too, but, my question still stands. What did I do to upset you, and how do I make it right?”
As Pau begins to drive again, he sighs. “The other day, when we were having dinner with the guys and their girlfriends, why did you lean away from me when I tried to kiss you?”
You did that?
Genuine surprise takes over your face. “Wait, what did I do? Shit, Pau, I didn’t even realize.”
His bottom lip tugs between his teeth as he turns into your driveway. “Are you sure? Because it felt intentional.” His words had bite to them, whether he meant to or not.
“Seriously, I would’ve never done that intentionally. Is that why you’ve been so withdrawn?” You frown, leaning your head back against the headrest and unbuckling while Pau parks.
He nods shamefully, “sorry, I just got upset. I was being a dick when I should have just talked to you about it. I’m sorry.” He couldn’t meet your eyes, to annoyed with himself to face you.
“Pau.” You sigh out, “look at me.”
He does just that, meeting your eyes with a pained look. “I’m sorry.”
“I know. You can’t do this again, though.” You give him a warning tone, “and you owe me, big time.”
Nodding, Pau grabs your hand, giving it a tight squeeze. “After my next game, we should go on a date. Anywhere you want to go, i’ll take you.”
Tapping your chin, you ponder the idea. “How about a movie night? I want alone time, and you will be watching every movie I chose, got it? Oh, and please bring snacks.”
A smile forms on Pau’s lips, causing one to grown on yours. “Anything you want. Make a list, i’ll stop by the store on the way here.”
Sitting up and gathering your things, you nod. “Will do! Goodnight, I love you.”
“Goodnight, I love you.” Pau leans over, meeting your lips in a soft kiss.
likes , comments , and reblog’s are all appreciated. lmk if you’d like to be tagged in future pau posts.
DTS , @halfwayhearted @ar4ujos @sakashq @joaoflms @hrts4havertz @spidybaby @unx100to !
#pau cubarsi#pau cubarsi x reader#pau cubarsi x fem!reader#pau cubarsi x y/n#pau cubarsi angst#pau cubarsi x you#pau cubarsi one shot#pau cubarsi fanfic#pau cubarsi imagine#pau cubarsí#blurb#football#fanfic#fc barcelona#fc barcelona fic#fc barça#fc barca#angst#angst with resloved ending
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Birthday blues .ᐟ
Paring; coach!patrick x single mom!reader
Synopsis; your son's turning nine and you're finally facing the reality that your ex was officially a deadbeat. Oh and Patrick really can't build a bike (but his hearts in the right place)
Notes; I may start a tag list for this if I get enough interest? hm
Masterlist | coach!au masterlist
He was out of his depth. Wayyyy out of his depth teaching kids tennis was one thing but this? This was something he’d never imagined. He wasn’t even sure how he’d been roped into this yet here he was sitting on your living room floor on a Friday night surrounded by balloons and wrapping paper.
He huffed staring down at the instruction manual by his knees as he looked back to the parts of the bike on the floor. His lips pursed as he picked up another screw staring at it for a moment.
“Keep glaring at it like that and it might disappear.” You quipped looking up from the box in your lap. A small smile pulled at your lips as you watched him raise an eyebrow picking up another screw. “Why can’t they all be the same length.” He grumbled holding them up to show you.
Shrugging you grabbed the wrapping paper placing the box on it. “Because that would be too easy.” He huffed a laugh placing the screws down before stretching his legs out. Humming quietly you grabbed a piece of tape to secure the paper before folding the edges.
“You make that look so easy,” Patrick murmured watching you. His fingers tapped against the carpet you’d both been at this for a few hours now. You both worked surprisingly well together and besides the bike, almost everything was done and it was only ten.
Blowing out a breath he picked up a balloon before hitting it across the room. “I still think you're overcompensating. I know his Dad’s been a dick but this seems excessive.”
You finished the present before sliding it into the pile. “I know it’s just-” You paused letting out a sigh. “This is the first year his Dad’s not been in contact at all. I just want him to have a good say still.” Your voice lowered slightly, a look of sadness flashing in your eyes.
Noah hadn’t exactly taken his Dad’s recent distancing well. Ever since you’d been sick a month ago he’d pretty much refused to see his son, making excuse after excuse leaving you to pick up the pieces.
“Co-parenting was easier than this.”
Patrick smiled sympathetically, his tongue poking at his cheek as he thought for a moment. “You know it’s not your fault? The guy’s a dick, Noah’ll understand one day that maybe it was for the best.” He tried to keep his tone light but even he’d noticed Noah’s slight behaviour shift.
He seemed more subdued at practice, a sad look in his eyes that no child should have. “He’s gonna have a good day.” He shifted slightly closer, eyeing the pile of gifts. “His Dad’s the one missing out.”
He leaned down slightly to catch your gaze, his lips curling as you looked over. His gaze was soft, loving almost as your teeth caught your lip for a moment before your own lips curled into a small smile.
He handed you the instruction manual for the bike, his hand lingering over yours for a moment. “C’mon, let's get this thing finished.”
⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *
“That took us longer than it should have.” You grimaced looking over to the clock which read 12 am. Patrick chuckled shaking his head. “It wouldn’t have taken half as long if someone knew how to read instructions.”
You shot him an offended look. “It’s not my fault you don’t know your lefts from your rights!”
You glared at each other for a moment before laughing quietly. His eyes crinkled slightly as you straightened your leg out to nudge him. “Hey!” He gasped in mock offence as he grabbed your ankle before running his fingers up your calf.
Your leg jerked at the sensation, a gasp leaving your lips. His eyes widened before they filled with what you could only guess was a mix of amusement and trouble. “Oh. Someone ticklish I see.” He smiled innocently repeating the motion.
You shook your head trying to pull your leg back. “Patrick. Sta-stop.” You gasped as his fingers continued their attack. He hummed pretending to think for a moment before shaking his head. “I don’t think I will.”
He grinned at the sound of your laughter between your pleas for him to stop. A warm feeling filled his chest as you all but fell apart on the carpet, tears brimming in your eyes as you tried to pull your leg back.
You gasped falling back against the carpet as you finally managed to pull your leg away, your breath coming out in pants as you lay still. The room fell quiet as you stared at the ceiling for a moment.
Patrick shifted to sit beside you, his face coming into view as he grinned down at you, his expression filled with joy. You smiled up at him as your breathing calmed down “You’re evil.”
Shaking his head he poked your side making you squeak. “Careful.” He raised an eyebrow before looking around the room. “We did good hm?”
You had. The room was covered in balloons and a few banners with the bike and presents by the window. “We did.” You smiled sitting up.
You yawned stretching your arms out and groaning slightly. God you were tried.
“I better get going,” Patrick said as he stood. “Tell him I said happy birthday.” He grabbed his jacket before pulling an envelope out and passing it to you. Your heart warmed slightly as you noticed the slight flush on his cheeks as you turned the envelope over in your hands.
“You didn’t have to-” He shook his head, shrugging. “It’s nothing. Felt wrong to show up empty-handed.”
Your eyes softened as you nodded. That was possibly the sweetest thing he’d ever done. The fact that he’d even had the thought to get a card was adorable and the sheepish look on his face added to that.
“Well, that's very kind.”
He nodded glancing to the door for a moment before raising his hand. “Well… I’ll see you at practice.”
You hummed nodding as you placed the card down by the presents before standing. An idea flashed through your mind as you stared down at the envelope which now lay beside your own.
“Patrick.” You turned back, making your mind up before you could psyche yourself out. “Do…do you wanna stay?”
⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *
Noah grinned, bouncing on his feet as you knocked on the guest room door. You pushed it open ever so slightly but before you could say anything Noah raced in. “Patrick!” He grinned poking the man's side.
Patrick mumbled something before his eyes fluttered open with a quiet groan. He frowned for a moment at the feel of something poking him before he remembered the night before.
You’d let him stay over. You’d let him stay over.
A giddy feeling spread across his chest as he opened his eyes again, now more alert as Noah’s messy curls came into view. “Noah, c’mon give him some space.” You hummed stepping in and gently moving the boy back.
“Can we go open presents now?” He whined looking between you both. A quiet laugh left you as Patrick sat up. Noah whined again looking between you both.
“Fine.” You relented watching as he squealed. Patrick laughed at his enthusiasm moving to stand from the bed. “Morning.”
“Morning.” You smiled as Noah tugged on your hand.
The three of you made your way downstairs, Noah gasping as he saw the living room he turned back to you both, his eyes bright and full of joy as he bounced on his feet. “Happy birthday.” Kneeling down you pressed a kiss to his cheek as he wrapped his arms around you.
Your son's joy was infectious as you found any worry you’d had about his father's absence slipping away. Noah didn’t seem to mind one bit as he pressed into your embrace for a moment before setting his sights on Patrick.
He hadn’t questioned why his coach was here when you’d told him. He’d simply grinned harder before demanding he come open presents with you both. The little boy left your hold to barrel into Patrick’s legs.
Patrick stumbled slightly but leaned down to wrap his arms around the boy. “Happy birthday bud.”
You watched them both your heart swelling slightly at the sight of your son smile, all thoughts of his dad seeming to disappear as he smiled up at Patrick.
You’d promised yourself you wouldn’t fall for Patrick. You refused to let your son get hurt yet you knew your walls had fallen. Patrick had managed to wiggle his way into your lives and part of you had never been happier.
“Okay.” You shook your head pushing the thought away. Your son's birthday wasn’t the time to have a crisis over your feelings for a guy. “Who want’s to open presents hm?”
Noah’s hand shot up. “Me!”
#challengers#patrick zweig#challengers movie#challengers 2024#patrick zweig x reader#patrick zweig x you#patrick zweig x y/n#patrick zweig imagine#patrick zweig smut#patrick zweig fic#patrick zweig fanfiction#challengers patrick#challengers x reader#challengers x y/n#challengers x you#josh o'connor#josh o'connor x reader#challengers imagine#art donaldson#art donaldson x reader#tashi duncan#.mine#.challengers#.patrickzweig
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9-1-1 Lonestar SPOILERS
Aw Jonah and TK 🥺
Mama “I bet that car costs the same house in some places”
Owen and Enzo are this close to acting like school yard boys 🙄
Poor Judd trying to do business stuff and Owen going off
Owen offering to break bread and TK does not believe him but he’s still hopeful and then Owen turns to Judd and was like I’ll show TK and rub it in Enzo face
Weren’t you just it saying that TK and Gwyn fell for it when Enzo was manipulative???
Wyatt using his story to save her life 😭😭😭
Nancy with Tommy at the appointment 😭
Dang girl
My mama “dang she don’t mess around”
I like that Izzy seems comfortable with Nancy which implies that maybe Nancy (and hopefully TK) hang out with Tommy & the girls
Tommy that’s too much pressure
On yourself and Nancy
Mom got a kick out of Enzo knowing Owen’s rent
TK and Jonah having a contest 🥹
I love TK, he’s such a sweetheart, especially with kids
My Mama never watches the sneak peeks and as soon as they started talking about the arm wrestling contest and then TK was like let’s just let it go my mama goes I dont think they’re gonna let it go lol
Bleh 🤢
That’s a nasty break
$350, 000 car
My mama “DAMN we could buy condo for that”
Carlos really still wants to be on Owen’s good side lol
TK snapping at Owen 😭
To be fair though, Owen needed to hear that
Nancy trying to help get Tommy rest days 😭
And Tommy not wanting Nancy and TK to get stuck with an awful temp-boss 😭
Tommy snapping at Nancy 💔
Aaaahhh 😭😭😭
“Nancy WALK”
Mama “She is STUBBORN”
Did TK just appear? Did he run ahead of the others?
Aww for that guy and his future stepdaughter
Oooh god, I really thought we were gonna have another burst gut (911 last week)
And mom was like dang why is that getting popular because apparently it also happened on Chicago Med or Fire recently
I wonder the whys on that
TK’s party is really cute
I love Carlos calling TK out and bringing him on stage with his baseball song
Omgod TK bringing Enzo and Owen together
Them singing together 🥺
Oh gosh darn it
At the PARTY?
Booooo 😭
Also Owen reassuring TK that even if Enzo is bad for the things he’s done to others he’s still good for raising TK right and I think that’s really important for him to hear
Oooh, Carlos really wants to get him that car doesn’t he, lol
Owen and Carlos are so gonna come together to buy a RED mclaren next year lol
Also how many parties/get togethers has that been that’s been runined/tragic for them all now?
Tommy stop, please
You’re gonna hurt yourself
And that’s exactly what happened
Tommy!!!
Oh poor Izzy and Evie
They’re doing so well and Wyatt is coaching them so well 🥺
I’m not sure they know they’re talking to Wyatt so being told “my dads gonna meet you at the hospital” is probably really out of the blue lol
Tommy telling Judd to call Nancy 🥺
I’m sorry, this is so silly but why did she give Judd her purse? Is she not allowed to have it?
The girls being asleep on the hospital waiting chairs and Judd watching them
The Ryders and Vegas are an extended family unit fr
Tommy 😭
Nancy trying to reassure Tommy 😭
“You’re wise and patient, which is more than I can say for myself right now”
My mama “that’s for sure”
I love Tommy wanting Nancy being interim paramedic captain
Promo:
I know people have been calling it for a while but I really wasn’t expecting them to go down the adopting Jonah route
The ceiling is bleeding?
Soup man got shot?
#911 lone star spoilers#tk strand#911 lone star#owen strand#carlos reyes#enzo#jonah morgan#tommy vega#nancy gillian#wyatt harris#judd ryder#marjan marwani#paul strickland#mateo chavez#tarlos
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Hi Ada! I've been feeling very bleh myself and I haven't done a very good job at keeping up with the tag games, so thank you for starting this! I would love to share, and I hope you feel better soon. 🩵
I haven't been up to much other than being overwhelmed by classes, but these are a few things that have brought me joy recently.
Wags being cute and cozy. A sunrise. Some delicious french toast that I made. Max joining my mom and I while we were watching a movie. A sunset. The lightning game I went to with my friend.
what's up wednesday
Hey everyone! Thanks for the tags. I've been steadily working away at both kinktober and the rent boy au, but I'm kind of in a bleh mental space right now so I don't really feel like sharing.
That said, because of bleh mental space, I'd love, love, love to hear something positive that's happening with all of you!
Whether that be something that made you smile, something you're proud of, a picture of your pet, I want all the good vibes! Feel free to reply, reblog, send an ask, message me or not reply it all, I won't take it personal!
Tagging those that have tagged me already:
@nisbanisba, @thisbuildinghasfeelings, @heartstringsduet, @paperstorm, @carlossreaders
@strandnreyes
Then I'll tag some of the usual crew:
@reyesstrand, @herefortarlos, @lemonlyman-dotcom, @carlos-in-glasses, @carlos-tk
@theghostofashton, @bonheur-cafe, @basilsunrise, @never-blooms, @literateowl
@lightningboltreader, @honeybee-taskforce, @guardian-angle22, @goldenskykaysani, @eclectic-sassycoweyes
@freneticfloetry, @fifthrideroftheapocalypse, @sanjuwrites, @sheholdsthemoon, @actual-sleeping-beauty
@ironheartwriter, @irispurpurea, @your-catfish-friend, @whatsintheboxmh, @welcometololaland
@rmd-writes, @butchreyes, @emsprovisions, @tellmegoodbye and then here's a tag for anyone who just wants to share some good news <3 <3 <3 <3
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dale cooper twin peaks is one of the characters ever. btw
#rambles#I started watching it recently with my mom#i love him hes great#tbh I love in general how weird shit just happens or exists#people can be a little strange as a treat#like idk if log lady is gonna ever be explained#but she doesn't need to be#she's simply log lady#thats just who she is and she's so real for that#anyway uh. yeah 👍
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My friend is judging me for my crush on Foggy from Daredevil.
#It's literally one of my least strange crushes let me have this#i started watching the show semi-recently with my mom. its great#tell me I'm not the only one though PLEASE#vee's random thoughts go brr#vee's thinking too much#foggy nelson
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love watching Brennan try SO HARD to get the group to send Gilear home but they all unanimously refuse and keep giving any possible reason for him to stay along for the ride
#fantasy high season 2#i recently started watching fantasy high and finished season 1 last week#Gilear is so so funny... my favorite cringefail man. i completely understand Fabian's mom
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Completely unprompted opinion, but I was just thinking about it since I was drawing raccoons, so here we go. Since I was younger I never really was a fan of Marvel films, which, back in 2016-ish would be met with disagreement and disbelief, but I think is more of a widely accepted opinion (not wholly accepted) in this moment of time. I bring this up, because whilst I never was a fan of the superhero genre nor the majority of Marvel films, there was a few that fell under those categories that I ended up liking, and quite a bit. Those movies were the Guardians of the Galaxy (the whole trilogy to be honest), and Deadpool. I’m mostly gonna focus on the former, since you may/may not notice a few reblogs of fanart from GotG. If it wasn’t easy to guess, Rocket was always my favorite of the cast of those films. Maybe I’m biased toward animals, cyborgs, sci-fi experiments, and characters who are seen as “assholes” at first glance. I also just like raccoons, they’re cute.
Why do I bring all of this up? Literally just because I might make a fursona that’s just a knockoff Rocket. I already modified an old one to have very similar cybernetics to him, but now I’m just gonna have a complete knockoff because why not?
#spaghetti speaks#just rambling#rambles#ramblings#i’m rambling#fursona#Raccoon#rocket raccoon#gotg#The cyborg animals of the third film just really fascinated me to be honest#Still don’t see Lylla as a love interest to be honest- she was more of a mom/older sister to me#but grah#Rocket’s my favorite#I wanted a raccoon sona anyway but watching the third film recently makes me want one more#Please do not start a fight over my opinion of Marvel- I do not wish to argue#People can like what they like I just personally couldn’t get invested#(and my head hurts midway through every Marvel film- even the ones I like)#(I blame constant motion or CGI I don’t know)
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This is the first color art I've seen of the Yozakuras, so let's talk colors! Specifically, hairstyles. I gotta admit, I was surprised by the official hair colors. In my head, I was picturing Shinzo and Shion with coppery/auburn hair, and I pictured Futaba's hair as white blonde, not straight up bone-white. I'm happy to have correctly guessed Kengo's bright yellow hair, at least—he just feels blond lol. I also pictured Taiyo and Mutsumi having black hair, so I was surprised when they turned out to have red and blue, respectively.
I'm a little mixed on the hair colors tbh. I like that all the siblings are color-coded, but part of me feels like it's a little too much—I mean, siblings having wildly different hair colors AND it's all super bright anime colors like green and purple feels like overkill. I also feel like the excess of clashing colors can overwhelm the eyes when you put the Yozakuras all together in a group shot like this.
That being said, I do like the characterization tied up in the colors. Kyoichiro being the only child to have black hair feels very poignant, especially since he always wears black suits that make him look gaunt and ghoulish. I like the contrast between Kyoichiro (black) and Futaba (white), and the yin-yang element at play with Taiyo (red) and Mutsumi (blue). And I just looooove Nanao's cyan bucket-helmet, since it's a) fitting for the baby of the family and b) a good color for him.
I'm still not sold, but I can already feel the colors growing on me, so maybe it's just a matter of getting used to it *shrugs*
#i also started watching the anime recently which probably affects my opinions on this as well#i don't think the bright unsaturated colors that the anime uses are doing it any favors#with shading the hair colors look strange but reasonable#in the anime they're straight-up garish#anyway this all makes me super interested in seeing the extended family's hair colors as well#did the yozakura mom have anime hair? or the yozakura dad? what about the grandparents' hair?#heck what about the previous house heads#considering how important they become later on i'm willing to bet they have color-coded anime hair in spades#one more reason to look forward to meeting the rest of the yozakuras#mission yozakura family#group tag#brainrot fodder#sage rambles
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NOOOOOOOOOO YOURE MAKING ME CRY (GENUINELY)
EDIT: I continued reading and.. iroh is alive. Ok now I'm just disappointed not even happy
#just finished atla recently and started reading the graohic novel#and OUCH#IROH NOOO#my mom would definitely cry too#iroh was her fave character since he beginning#atla#avatar#avatar the last airbender#the last airbender#uncle iroh#atla zuko#prince zuko#zuko#fire lord zuko#the promise#atla the promise#sad#i havent felt sadness in some time#iroh is such a sad character#hes the only one that managed to make me cry watching atla#besides the music playing during zuko and azulas duel#im getting off topic#goodbye iroh :(
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The Extraordinary Attorney Woo show has me fucked up (emotionally)
#my mom and i have started watching it together recently#extraordinary attorney woo#actually autistic#actually audhd#actuallyneurodivergent
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#just gonna post some thoughts down here real quick#being trans has felt incredibly scary recently#so like when I go to formal events I dress fem#it’s more fun that way for me#some people are none the wiser#others can clock me#usually it hasn’t made a difference#but the other night I went to an event and went out for drinks with friends after#and I had a great time and felt very glamorous#but then as I was walking back to my car two people started following me and I became very aware of their presence#and in listening to their conversation they started talking about how they should teach me a lesson#I wanted to run but I knew that would aggravate the situation so I called my mom and put my keys inbetween my knuckles#hoping they’re get the message#ultimately I made it back to my car and they kept walking but it was one of the scariest moments I’ve had in a long time#and then last night I went to another gala for my work#and I of course dressed fem again#and this time it was all polite society#but I felt like such an alien#like people watched me as I went into the bathroom#and despite me being in a dress and heels#people would call me sir with a sneer#and it all just feels so scary#like upper society will cast you out and spread rhetoric that make those in vulnerable positions feel like you’re the enemy#and I’m really just considering being more quite about it so that way I stay safe even if it means I’m unhappy#I won’t because then they win#but it’s so tempting
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in this weird existential state where i am reblogging absolute bullshit in an attempt to cope with having the worst day of my life so far
#if anyone wants to know what's happened.#we have to put down my cat. he's hardly even a year and a half old#we don't even know what got him this sick but#the best guess is feline coronavirus that's mutated after he inherited it from his mom#hes been sick for three months and recently he just started. shutting down#there's nothing left to do#hes in so much pain and can't really even walk anymore#its. really painful to watch and worse knowing i can't help him.#i just hope this brings him peace.
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there are things abt me that i dont talk about not because im being secretive i either just forget to mention it or think no one wants to hear about it but i think it gives like important context to whats wrong with me 💖
#me when im a child of a messy divorce because my dad has crazy issues that he never got help for so he started self medicating#and dealt with addiction and got to the point of stealing money or trying to return items he never bought to walmart for a refund#and got arrested many times and eventually spent 5 years in prison which literally didnt help at all just gave him more trauma and#caused relationship issues between him and his family which left him without healthy connections and support and#then he got accused of a crime even my mom doesnt believe he did and she'd experienced horrible things from him while they were together#and so he disappeared to run from the police and hes been legally considered a missing person for many years now and it is unknown to#us or any of his family members if hes even still alive out there somewhere and ive had dreams that he comes back and#i wonder if theres something that could be done something that could help him maybe we could never truly be on good terms again but#maybe at least he could have a chance at a decent life even if its away from us#i used to sit on the couch with him and watch nascar and monster trucks when i was little#and i still have some of his nascar novelty items in my desk drawer and the pocket tool that used to be his.#the scars of his tantrums are still in our house the holes he punches in walls covered up with copy paper taped over the wall#and im sure i have the same anger issues or whatever disorders he never got properly diagnosed for because i seem to have inherited everyth#ng from him his eyes his face his hair his anger issues even his handwriting somehow#and he is why im scared of ever doing any drugs because i just know im probably genetically predisposed to addiction just like him#and i dont want that to happen to me#recently i cut my hair and i looked in the mirror and i looked just like him#when i visit my paternal grandparents and aunts and uncles i see the family photos with him hanging on the walls#and i see that large painting that used to be in our house#👍
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How do people have the energy to watch entire tv shows omg
#grad school seriously killed my energy for watching things#like if I don't have something to work on while the show is playing then I guess... I'm just not watching it lol???#actually that's why I'm mostly watching anime right now#23 minutes once a week is the farthest my attention span reaches#and even then the only recent one I've finished recently was chainsaw man#though to be fair the last few weeks have been INSANE so I haven't had the time to do... literally anything#classes started AND I had to make a weekend trip to San Antonio AND I got sick#lord have mercy on my dwindling energy supply#the only shows I watch lately are the ones that mom and I can agree on so nothing too violent or dark#bored badgering
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i'm only 4 minutes into ep 11 of 10 years ticket and i'm already cring over ohm pawat's acting
HE'S DOING THE SAME THING AS HE DID IN EP 5 ROOFTOP SCENE (MY BELOVED <3) AND YET IT'S SO DIFFERENT
#god i cannot WAIT to go home for semester break and rewatch the recent eps with my mom#also i know i could have noticed that last week as well bc we already saw this part at the end of ep 10#but they had that random cut to the wide shot in between (for drama i guess?) and it was also the end of the ep#so my attention was also not that great anymore#anyway they repeat that part at the beginning of ep 11 and now the random white shot is gone and i'm just there watching it#not really thinking much of it when suddenly i go.... wAIT. I'VE SEEN HIM DO THIS BEFORE.#i LOVE it when actors do actor things#maybe i'll get round to making gifs#10yt#10yt ep11#adrm#airenyah plappert#no really it's the way his eyes start darting around trying to figure out what the best (and most diplomatic) answer is#when plu asks him if he's falling for kongkwan#and then also in bbs when pran asks ''do you want to be my friend?''#his breathes in and his eyes dart around and his eyes also twitch a little#as he's mentally going through all the answers and their possible outcomes#and then both in 10yt and in bbs he swallows the moment he has made up his mind#the moment he decides for the answer he's going to go with#it's the same general actions and yet in 10yt it's so DIFFERENT from bbs we love to see it#god once again i love when actors do actor things
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