#I started the game thinking I would just chill and have a farm

[selenechris]

Sifuu: Kenli says that selling weapons would break the vibe.

Me, on romance path with Reth, wanting to go berserk ever since the first mention of the cartel: Please do.

[nobodyknowsanything]

okay so i have this world on minecraft where im just building a little cozy farm and thats it and my skin is andrew and it just made me think

we know andrew plays video games with aaron and nicky, right?

so one day, years later when andrew and neil live together and are both pro, one night after a challenging match (though andrew won’t admit it) he needs something to help his mind calm down and chill tf out, so he downloads minecraft on his laptop and starts to play.

neil notices him glued to his laptop more often after that, but doesn’t question it. he glances over andrews shoulder every so often out of curiosity but he probably doesn’t recognise the game because he’s not really bothered with that sort of stuff so he leaves him to it.

at first andrew goes through the expected motions of a new minecraft world, gathering materials, fighting monsters, and eventually working up to kill the ender dragon. he battles some of the other bosses too, as they get added to the game. but he starts to find the process monotonous and not enough. its all the same after a while and although he would rather cut his dominant hand off than admit it, fighting zombies and especially fucking skeletons stresses him out more than he’s comfortable with, let alone fighting the big bad bosses.

playing minecraft on peaceful mode always seems to get a bad rep, like why are you playing if you’re on peaceful, what’s the point if there’s no monsters?

but andrew thinks to himself, has he ever really cared what other people think of him? the answer is no, and so next time he loads up the game after his and neils team won a match barely by the skin of their teeth, he creates a new world and sets the mode to peaceful.

he sits there for hours. well into the night and early hours of the morning, definitely ruining his eyes but he just gets lost in the simple ease of gathering small things he would’ve previously considered insignificant, and starts with building a farm. he organises it by each different type of crop, builds pens for each animal as well as a farmhouse, windmill and huge wheat field. it brings him so much peace, it becomes part of his routine. every night, even if he’s had a relaxing day, he builds his little farm that soon develops into a small village and then a whole society. neil sometimes leaves him to it and sometimes sits next to him on the sofa, busying himself or unabashedly watching andrew play.

as the new updates get added, with new biomes and features, andrew keeps playing and exploring new parts of the world, building in the new places and connecting everything together. its where he lets the inside of his mind out on show, and if anyone else asked, it never even existed but he lets neil look, shows him round with a boredness in his voice that neil sees right through to the almost pride and calm. neil doesn’t think hes ever seen andrew so wholeheartedly focused on anything simply for the pleasure it brought him.

and maybe one day neil will buy the game for himself and andrew will let neil join this world he’s been creating for years and they’ll continue to build it together, their own little escape to a much more simple world where they get to be in control and nothing is out to get them.

[stardewstardropthoughts]

ahh imagine the bachelors when you’re pregnant talking to your belly to get the baby to calm down at night. like the baby likes to keep you awake at night by kicking you directly in the ribs and the only thing that works is your husbands voice.

I think shane would feel super awkward at first since hes not much of a talker anyway, but it becomes a cherished nightly routine for him in the last few weeks of your pregnancy “hello, papa shane reporting for duty, its time to chill out so your mother can get some sleep” and tell it chicken stories, elliott would read poetry and shakesphere, Alex would probably talk sports to it.

I would LOVE to hear your headcanons

Deadass sleeping while pregnant is so hard, and when the tiny child your growing rolls they’re whole body while your trying to sleep? It feels so weird 😂 also listen I know Skyrim isn’t in Stardew but I love it and I know Sebastian would also, lemme have this lmao

The bachelors talking to your baby bump to calm down your unborn child so you can sleep

Harvey:

Probably a bit nervous at first because he isn’t sure what to say

But when your having issues sleeping because your unborn child keeps kicking you as hard as they can he agrees to give it a shot

Gently lays his head on your bump

“Hey there little one, your moms out here trying her best to grow you and she needs to sleep to do that, think you might be able to settle down a bit?”

Is surprised when his voice seems to calm the unborn child down

Very quickly becomes his favorite part of the nightly routine

“Well hello in there tiny one, thank you for tuning into the nightly talk show. Today we’re gonna learn about you! That’s right, tonight’s broadcast is all about your growth”

Your giggling at his little radio show impersonation

Alex:

Ya know those TikTok videos of people doing little handshakes with their wife’s pregnant bellies and then when the baby’s born? He’s doing that, just wanted to add in that tid bit lol

He probably noticed you were having issues sleeping and he could see all the wild movements from the outside

Leans down and starts talking to the bump

“Hey kiddo, I know your doing your own thing in there but momma needs to sleep, whatcha need?”

When you tell him the baby calmed down after hearing his voice he’s thrilled

Will 100% explain the rules of gridby in depth to your unborn child

“Okay so if you wanna grow up big and strong like your daddy, your gonna have to have proper nutrition, lucky for you I have years experience”

Spends almost every night at bedtime telling your unborn child all about the farm and gridby and of-course rusty the dog

Sam:

Mans been talking to your baby way before they could hear or acknowledge him

He’s just so excited

“Hey little guy, mommy’s trying to sleep so we gotta calm down, I know you wanna shred but once your out I’ll teach ya to skateboard”

Definitely goes over skateboarding safety with your unborn child

“Sam he’s not even born yet”

“Okay but he’s gotta know how to grind the pipe baby, it’s a great skill”

100% also going to blow a raspberry on your bump to startle the baby cause it’s funny

Shane:

Dude definitely chats with your baby bump all the time

Especially when your cuddling so mostly at night when y’all are going to bed

Probably the reason the infant can’t stop kicking you without hearing from daddy first

“Hey kiddo, you’ll never guess what kinda antics the chickens got up to today, I can’t wait to introduce you to Charlie”

Definitely brought Charlie in the house once and put him on your bump

“Hey kiddo, this is Charlie, he’s my favorite chicken but don’t tell the others that”

You gently pat Charlie’s head while he looks very confused about the situati

Sebastian:

Mans fully prepared to teach your kid all about video games when Theyer old enough

But when they won’t stop kicking you at night unless he talks to them? Now they get to learn early

“So in Skyrim right? There’s a whole character builder and you get to pick what race you want to be, I always go for dark elf personally but you can be whatever you want”

It’s like two hours later, your asleep and he’s still going

“So when you get to white run you have to find the jarl and tell him about the dragons attacking helgen so he’ll send troops to riverwood and then there’s a whole side mission to go on to get the dragon stone and-“

Notices your soft snoring and chuckles to himself silently

“Okay kiddo, we’ll pick this up again tomorrow night, good night my little tadpole, love you”

Presses a little kiss to your bump before going to sleep

Elliott:

This mans been reading poems and story’s to your bump since he learned that baby’s can hear and recognize voices

It’s a nice little nightly routine, after baths and pjs and whatever snack your craving you both settle in and he grabs a book

Tonight’s book selection is the complete works of Edgar Allen Poe

“Alright little one, it’s story time”

Cozy’s up with his head on your bump

“Once upon a midnight dreary, as I pondered weak and weary over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore”

Loves knowing he can sooth the baby even before They’re born yet

Also loves knowing he can provide a bit more comfort to you as you grow them

[thegoober010]

BOO!! Did i scare you :3

I LOVEDDD THE LAST ONESHOT JT WAS SO CUTE IM GOING CRAZY GOING FERAL

ANYWHOOO i hope your day has gone well!!! Make sure youve eaten and youve drank water!!! Ill know if you havent 👁️👁️ /j

BUT I HAVE A REQUEST. As always. Whos surprised. *theres no sound but a few crickets chirping and someone yelling “GET OFF THE STAGE”*

But basically its Shane x reader who is his secret admirer, like he’s been getting letters from them and he doesnt know who its from. And reader is usually kinda sarcastic towards him so he doesnt think its them UNTIL he sees them writing something down like a grocery list or something and recognizes the handwriting immediately.

It can be a oneshot OR headcanons, I don’t mind :)

SOSOSO SORRY IF THIS IS TO SPECIFIC. I just have. So many thoughts. THANK YOU IN ADVANCE!!!

-🐾

OH MY- I FORGOT ABOUT THIS BLOG WHAT THE SCALLOP

IM SORRY SM YALL IM FINALLY BACK THO FOR A BIT MWEHEHEHEH

ALSO IM SO SORRY FOR MY ABSENCE IMA DO SOME HEADCANONS CUZ LIKE IM RLLY BUSY RN AND NEED TO FINISH HOMEWORK BUT IMA FINISH THIS FIRST!! GRAAAA ITS GONNA BE PRETTY SHORT THO SORRY BOOKIE :<!!!

gender neutral reader as usual <3!!

TW/CW -> none! Just some swearing but- wtv!

"All my emotions feel like explosions when you are around"

Honestly he always enjoyed your company, of course at first he was rather grouchy (and an asshole) whenever you were near him. Always giving you a scowl or rolling his eyes when he saw you getting near him, but he slowly started to get used to your company. What!? It's not like he enjoyed your company! Of course not! What a foolish though. (sarcasm)

He got more used to your company, allowing you to be seen more often near him but he was still not used to the gifts you'd give him. He understood it was so he could be more comfortable around you and be more friendly but he wasn't really used to getting gifts. But he didn't really think anything of it

After a while of you two hanging out more often, you both were always seen together, so much to the point people asked if you were dating which of course you both said no, but you both didn't seem uncomfortable with the idea whenever asked... Anyways.. Shane always came over to your farm where you'd always give him a nice meal and a very small amount of beer (each time he came over you'd reduce the amount of beer given and slowly start getting him to drink more water to try and help with his addiction, you'd also regularly listen to him through these meals about any of his problems and in turn he'd listen back) and you two would just chill, watch TV, play some games or go out and fool around!

After a good 4 months though he started to get strange notes... he didn't bother reading them at first until he noticed a word that quickly grabbed his attention, 'love'. He was honestly indifferent towards the letters, he didn't really care for them until he started to get them more and more often. It was rather confusing as he started getting all these letters all of a sudden, and not just any letters but love letters! It was a bit overwhelming to be honest, he never knew anyone would feel such a way towards him, not like he cared much..at first, after a while though he started to wonder who liked him and he even wondered if.. maybe he started to grow attracted to the person just through these letters!

Once you were with him he told you about the letters and even showed them to you, your face turned red and you immediately left him all confused as you wouldn't answer any of his questions on why you were as red as a damn tomato. He never really got his answer for a while. Due to your sarcastic nature you kept on teasing him about the notes and whenever he asked you questions like, "Who do you think it is?" or things of that sort you'd always roll your eyes and just go "oh I wonder who!" in a monotone voice, leaving him a bit confused.

After a while the letters started to die down, but that doesn't mean they got any less romantic, no, in fact I'd say they had even more romance talk than ever! They started to allude to the fact that the anonymous sender of these messages will confess soon, often reading "P.S lots of love, and I promise I'll see you soon <3!" or things to that nature

To be honest he actually started to look forward to these notes, although he found them a bit creepy at first or boring he started to get rather happy? The thought of someone liking him romantically so much to the point they send him love letters and admirer notes was sweet to him in a sense?

One day he randomly went to your farm and barged into your home, you know like how best friends do. He grabbed a few drinks from your fridge as he watched you make a grocery list. You were humming a soft tune while Shane's eyes got wider and wider as he saw you write. He spit out his drink causing you to stare at him strangely. "Shane! The hell dude? You alright?" You'd ask and he just stared at you like '😲'

You look at him like 'wtf?? you okay???' and he just wipes off the juice on his chin and helps clean up the spilt juice. His ears and cheeks were turning red as he did so, covering his mouth and stifling a nervous/awkward laugh.

"Your handwriting... I recognized it from the notes." he says quickly and you just go from "what??" to "WHAT" very quickly, absolutely shocked he could figure it out so easily from such a small detail!. You both stayed in awkward silence for a good 3 minutes as he helped clean.

He let out a cough and just quickly ruffled your hair and looked away "Don't worry.. I like you too.. the letters are uh nice too by the way.." is all he says. You both stay in an awkward silence for another good 5 minutes

After the awkwardness you both have a good talk and decide LETS MAKE IT OFFICIAL!! Yall both like eachother! Yall both wanna be together! So like why not!?!??! And oh wow he is one of the best boyfriends you've ever had :)!

He tries his best to improve his flaws, he knows he's not the best person and he's willing to change not just for himself but for you too, he wants to feel better about who he is now that he has you and he wants you to see him as who he wants to be as well.

You both plan out lots of activities together while dating and such, both of you are pretty much inseparable and no one is surprised you two started dating :)! (I FEEL LIKE MAKING SHANE BF HEADCANONS NOW OMG-)

For your guys' anniversary what he does is make you a letter and sends it with flowers, usually signing it 'secret admirer' and at the bottom he puts a little 'P.S it's actually your bf' just so that you don't get uncomfortable thinking it might be someone else lmao

You get really embarrassed when he brings up the fact you wrote him secret love letters and sent them to him, you thought it was a little cringe of you to do and it made you seem weird, but to him it was rather sweet, he loved it. From time to time he asks you to make some if you're comfortable with since the letters always made his day when he read them everyday! they made him feel better about himself :)!

..

bonus - > (definitely the little spoon when cuddling ANYWAYS.)

[bepisbee]

Heey here's a stardew valley au (vidow ofc)

would anyone be interested in a part 2? (or a spicy oneshot about it?)

~~~~

By the end of the week, poor Vio was exhausted. He wiped sweat off his brow as the dark oranges and reds lit his hard work in a gorgeous sunset. This was certainly a change, but not an unwelcome one. When he had learned his inheritance he was skeptical. Honestly he didn’t think it was genuine, more of a jab at his recluse behaviors.

But here he was. A few thousand gold and a farm richer. Hell, Mayor Falon seemed alright enough and not concerned with property tax or anything. It would be too soon if he ever saw another tax document again.

Vio hummed in thought, walking a bit sluggish towards town. The skies turned, opening into darker hues; the reds muddling into purples and midnight blues. He pulled out a small notebook, turning to a page of names. He’d been given them by the mayor as a little task. Get to know everyone in town, settle in, make a few friends. Friends go far in a small town like this. One name not crossed.

Shadow.

Determination fueled his gait towards the Din Tavern. According to Blue, the adventurer’s guild leader, he was returning today. And most likely would be found by nightfall in their tavern. A creature of habit he was, and a creature for sure. The darkness fell quickly around the town, a warm spring breeze making it just a bit chilled. The smell was enticing, between grass pollen, fresh flowers, and a yeasty bread smell that grew as he gained ground. Red was clearly baking tonight. He wondered if their partner was already there to help. The thought of Red’s rose tinted excitement talking about him made him slip a smile momentarily.

As he opened the heavy wooden door, he was blasted with a bubble of warm air and the smell of a perfect hearth. The stools, tables, and games were bustling with the majority of the townsfolk. A few looked up with a friendly wave or nod, which he returned.

Vio looked around. Tucking his blonde braid behind his back, he scanned the rooms.

There he is.

Time seemed to stop as blood rushed past in his ears. Just starting to turn his direction, a man sat leaning on the bar. And damn was he a man. Vio gulped. He was in a casual gray undershirt and leggings. Clearly part of an armor set, perhaps chainmail, that would have normally covered some assets. Despite the mild inappropriate display, no one paid him much mind. This must be usual for him. He clearly hadn’t had time yet to shave the dark purple stubble across his jawline. Thankfully the hair framing appeared freshly washed. Vio was suddenly a little self conscious of his own, covered in today’s dirt and work.

As he turned, gorgeous mismatched eyes in a red and blue greeted him. Freckles smattering everywhere on each inch of visible mocha skin. Vio couldn’t help it, as his brain supplied: delectable, dangerous, and desire.

Shadow’s incredible face wove into a smirk. He motioned an invite to sit with him. It took Vio a second to come back and immediately obeyed.

“Hey there,” Oh he was done for. That velvet voice was going to be the end of him. “Must be the inherited farmer,” he leaned in close. “I’m Shadow. I clear out the mines northa here and in Gerudo Desert,” like most of the town, he gives a name and small job introduction.

“I-m” he clears his throat of the small crack. “Violet. But please call me Vio.” He was so focused that he never noticed Red place a drink for him at the bar. Shadow was not afraid of eye contact. He felt like those eyes were swallowing him whole.

“Pleasure to meet you darling.” An award winning smile makes him melt. “Now, this might be a little out of nowhere but I have a favor to ask you.”

“Hm?”

“Usually I’d use Red’s spare room between runs…” he begins “But it’s a bit too much for me for so long, I don’t always get a good haul.” Shadow swirled his drink stein. “If it’s not too much trouble, I could help around the farm in exchange for staying there awhile?” awfully bold of him, Vio thought. Considering it took daylight to nightfall to work most days, he was tempted. As Shadow’s eyes traced over him, he decided.

“I don’t see why not.” Vio looks away and licks his bottom lip. “As long as you’re fine sharing a bed. The floor isn’t exactly comfortable.”

A devious glint sparked in his eyes. “Of course, with you? Who wouldn’t,~” Shadow finished his drink and left some gold for Red on the counter to cover both. “Shall we?” he stood and grinned. Vio nodded dumbly and followed.

Shadow grabbed a pack that had been on the floor and slung it over his shoulder. “Lead the way darling.” Vio got caught admiring the back end of his shapewear as he bent and flushed.

“Er-right! yes.” he held the door for him and they walked into the cooled night. It was refreshing. Crickets joined the background, making the pleasant walk less silent.

He couldn’t believe he was letting a total stranger stay with him, just because he was drop dead gorgeous.

Vio let him in, with a short tour. Small cabin, heat and water, mini kitchen, little couch, old crtv, and bedroom. Tiny bathroom with only a tub, no shower, connected. Shadow put his things in the corner.

“I’m.. um, going to wash up. Feel free to make yourself at home. There’s coffee and tea in the second cupboard if you’d like.” Vio internally berates his awkwardness and desire to invite the man to his bath. Shadow looks at him as if he knows.

“Don’t have too much fun without me,” he teases as the other closes the door. Vio’s heart pounded.

What has he gotten himself into??

[thatdeadaquarius]

hi! quick tip: if you’re on mobile type ‘:readmore:’ then hit enter! i dunno if you’ve been told but. yeah :)

also, your recent piece on apd was incredible!! very nice to see representation!! keep up the excellent work <3 it did get me thinking though: reader with vocal stims, cementing it in the acolytes’ minds that you don’t speak the language of teyvat, and then you’re all just stuck in this loop of “oh man they don’t speak the same language of me” but they DO

if asks are closed or this is outside of your comfort zone then feel free to delete! have a lovely day <3

AHFJLAKLOSUDBABWB U FELT REPRESENTED YAY!!

A cookie for thee, and also extra for telling me how to do Expand thingy on mobile ilysm 🤲🍩🍪✨️ (pspspsps all askers,, u get cookies,,cometothedarksidepspspspspsss)

I was so worried bc it wasnt like super all the aspects of Apd issues, and it was very based on my personal experience w/ similar symptoms + other bits of ppl's experience so i was hoping it still felt somewhat recognizable for ppl w/APD!! Tysm for the feedback :D

NOTE ABOUT VOCAL STIM DEPICTED:

So i think ive experienced verbal stims, so this is a combination of others shared experiences + personal experience, and while everybody experiences things individually/their own way, please let me know if there is something obviously inaccurate/maybe even offensive.

You will definitely not make me mad or otherwise offended, I really want to hear that kind of feedback from others who vocal stim!

Thank you so much for reading! :)

___________________♡_____________________

So lets just say that ur vocal stims r pretty non-verbal or non-sensical ("her sister was a WITCH BRO-" like memes that dont make sense to them)

Or like, u have verbal stims that r actual language but they dont hang around long enough to hear it maybe ??

♤

So like, this ends up happening

Chongyun was exploring near Qingce village for supernatural stuff as usual

And U were just vibin, chillin near Qingce village livin ur best Creator god cottagecore life

And ur like planting a new seedbed, Jueyun Chilis :) (bc jfc however bad it was to collect them in game, its 10x worse in person, ur tired of running around town getting chilis, Qingce isnt exactly flat 💀)

♡

And every seed u put in the dirt ur like "boop!"

And Chongyun comes by, bc u at edge of town, and the villagers mentioned a strange new traveler settling here

He immediately feels a wave of that same feeling he used to feel when the Creator god had their eyes on him, or would assist him in battles

So poor boy almost overheats trying to climb up the hill to ur house

And is like "??...Creator??"

Then kinda stops bc ur just like-

"Boop!" "Boop!" "Boop!" ☺️ LMAO

And then u finish planting seeds, get the watering can,,

And everytime u pour it just-

... "EJACK! Come, water!"

(Ur saying it so fast too, and he's still somewhat farther away, so he cant rlly hear that well too)

...

..

And its just so incomprehensible to Chongyun he's deadass like "A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE??!"

So of course,

He waves, 👋

And ur like omg icy boy!! :D 🧊💙

But u dont say anything yet, and then he starts,, miming?? He points at u? Then like?? Points up? The sky?? Then like, mimes swinging his claymore???

(ARE U THE CREATOR??!!)

U look up, very confused 🧐

He seemes frustrated.

Then he just kinda, bows and leaves?

...

...oh no.

Do Teyvat people speak that crazy language that u saw in game?

Instead of English??

Well.

Shit.

...

.... U havent rlly talked to anyone in Qingce yet since u just got here in Teyvat like a week ago

And found this abandoned house

♧

It just gets worse 😭

Bc slowly, one by one,

Each playable character in Liyue comes to attempt to talk to you

(And since u have a farm, and they keep giving u food/goods? For some reason?? U still dont need to go into town)

☆

At one point, even Zhongli shows up

And thru complex miming and hand motions u think he means dont worry abt him? Like just go back to what u were doing?? Okay??

U guess he's just gonna chill here for now?

...

...Zhongli just kinda,, squints, and puts his hand on his chin in his classic "thinking very hard" face

So ur tending to the garden saying,

" FREDDY! You're supposed to be on lockdown!Vanessa...I'm... a Material Gworl✨️"💀

...Just, on an endless loop LMAO-

...

(Hes trying to see if he recognizes any part of ur language, poor old man ����🤔😭)

♤

And it just snowballs even more, and now,

None of you have even tried to say a word to each other. 🤡

(Other than ur vocal stims)

...

Keqing: "Perhaps, it's similar to Fontaine's native language?"

You, in the background: "🎵 dUdE,,, sHe'S jUsT nOt InTo YoU 🎵" (mimicking the autotune and everything)

Ganyu & Keqing: "..."

You: " 🎵 gOtTa MoVe On, mOvE oN-🎵 Hurricane Katrina?? More like Hurricane Tortilla!"

Ganyu & Keqing: "...Can't be,"

"what else do we got? Should we call Yunjin to better mime for us??"

♡

Xiao's the first one to even get close to knowing u can actually talk to each other, bc he's always checking in on u most often <3

And he only heard u bc u swore u heard a monster outside ur house one night and came out ur house with a pitchfork, very nervous,

"...Hey there demons.. it's me.. ya boy."

(And u just keep stimming that out of nervousness to make urself feel better as u check around ur house lol)

Xiao: "??? Demons???!! WAIT-"

♧

By then, it literally took like 6 months for yall to finally have a real conversation 💀💀

...

(Chongyun got so embarassed bc he was one of the first few to misunderstand he overheated rip🙏)

Im. So. Sorry. This. Is. ✨️Ass✨️

Twas the best scenario i could come up with, im telling yall, im not as funny as the ppl who send in these asks 😔

Keep in mind, I never claimed i was funny or a good writer, u cant hold it against me lol /lh

Lower ur expectations LMAO

Well i hope u got sm enjoyment outta this anon, sorry abt the quality!! :)

Cheers,

🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

[blushblushbear]

sorry..... me again...… you can choose to ignore this if you feel like it's too much

(not trying to guilt-trip you, please don't feel pressured

uh maybe... Nimh? Nimh is cute I like Nimh

if you don't feel like doing him, maybe Poe or Anon?

*blows the dust off this ask* oops this one's pretty old

I already did Nimh so Anon and Poe it is

Anon

Okay not to call the scott a drunk

but I'm about to call the scott a drunk

he's not too bad, but he is a little picky about what he will and will not drink

low key judges people for their choice of beers

side eyes people who order basically liquid candy as a drink (for a cocktail at least, he will rot his teeth on mountain dew don't get it twisted)

he mostly does pints but his fav mixed drink is a moscow mule

or a spiked energy beverage

speaking of drinks he always has a crazy amount of them

g-fuel, red bull, monster-- every energy drink type thing you've seen he's probably got

also drinks prime

also mountain dew

a lot of it

I joke about his teeth rotting but in all honesty he takes good care of them

that's the one gamer stereotype he does not fall in town

he's low key germophobic so his apartment and battle station are SPOTLESS

he defo has those touchland hand sanitizers cause he's a boujee bitch

speaking of boujee he's actually p well off

started trading stocks young and did crypto till it tanked

he doesn't like to talk about his crypto days (he was a hard crypto bro at it's peak)

usually his drunk rambles are about crypto

also conspiracy theories

also video games

his parents are decently well off too but he doesn't talk to them much

they don't have a bad relationship but it's definitely one of those 'you see the family only around the holidays' kind of deals

he has a lot of internet buds but I think deep down he's bad at making real connections and actually gets pretty lonely

likes watching animal videos, WOULD NOT get a pet

rarely has people over to his place, took him a while to fully mentally accept having you over

he was determined to get over it though cause he really wanted you around

would never shower with someone cause that just feels unsanitary-- the shower is for CLEANING

would maybe get a snake-- they're pretty clean

once went 3 days without sleeping

actually lost a lot of sleep to stardew valley when it first came out

his farm is AMAZING

loves to troll at video games but not in a run face first into the enemy team and ruin it for everyone kinda way

more a does a 360 no scope on you right when you think you're safe

you mad bro??? lol

sends lots of memes about liking his s/o cause he's really bad at saying how he feels

favorite director is Edgar Wright cause he's a man of taste and culture

regularly cleans and buffs his nails

has at least one to two drinks chilling in every room of the house

really wants to get an ear piercing

really vain about his looks even though he dresses like garbage

just tell him he's handsome, he's legit too proud to beg but he needs that validation

listens to a lot of underground bands and artists

also a lot of djs

owns 15 pairs of headphones

5 have animal ears

showers at least once a day unless he's in a gaming trance

once tried to write you poetry, felt like an idiot, removed all evidence of it's existence and would deny it fully if you ever found out

Poe

Probably not a surprise to anyone but he got bullied a lot in high school

Has been writing poetry since he was 10 and has notebooks full of poems and short stories from over his life

really wants to write some kind of vampire mystery series centered around a brooding poet vampire but also he's bad at writing mysteries

I've sad this before but he's in a book club with Nimh and Cashew

he keeps trying to get them to read romantic novels

Cashew was game until he realized Poe meant like Lord Byron romantic

Mary Shelley Romantic

thinks Mary Shelley losing her virginity on her mother's grave is the coolest thing ever and is high key jealous

Mary Shelley is honestly his hero

secretly got addicted to soap operas

he wants to stop so bad but he can't

he doesn't have a pet but if he did he'd be that dude you can totally tell has a pet cause he's always covered in fur

not that Poe would even care

Poe actually never much cared for birds and is still salty about becoming a magpie

owns so many Victorian/Edwardian style coats

and vests

he's just one color palette/slight aesthetic change away from just being steampunk

owns so many bits of jewelry, it mostly just floats around his living spaces and he chooses what he's wearing that day at random

all the people who headcanon Poe as trans, you're correct

constantly painting his nails and it's always chipping

his nail polish is actually pretty jank but he doesn't care so long as his nails are black

his living spaces are a mess

lots of papers, lots of random odds and ends, lots of clothes and book and forgotten mugs everywhere

does actually partake in the music aspect of the goth culture

most of his fav bands are ones you haven't heard of

he doesn't actually like horror much

at least not this modern jumpscare nonsense

he likes his horror dark, dramatic, and poetically gorey

Saw??? more like pa-shaw he can't stand those movies

the closest thing he gets to liking more mainstream horror franchises is Chucky

Tiffany Valentine is his favorite (*jennifer tilly voice* ~Jennifer Tilly~)

he can always get down with halloween, but only the first one

he can fuck with Tim Burton and Guillermo Del Toro though

crimson peak is his shit

also Jane Austen bitch?!

he loves him some Jane Austen

Emily Dickinson

Mary Shelley obvs

he low key hates to be basic but fucking

read Emily Dickinson's poetry and tell him you're not simping

he legit does simp for Shelley and Dickinson

legit loves the Kira Knightly Pride and Prejudice will all his heart

Sylvia Plath

He's trying so hard not to be basic but he loves Wednesday Addams

that line about her being allergic to colors--- he felt that

regularly listens to sounds of rain and fireplaces

ye I think I'll end it here lol XD

[rocksibblingsau]

The 5 main AU Branchs playing Stardew Valley (I was going to do Canon as well, but got lazy rip)

Funk Branch starts playing the game fully intending to play it casually and have a chill relaxing time just taking it easy and slow, reaches perfection before year 1 ends. He marries Maru obviously, but his second option was Harvey.

Rock Branch is there purely to mine and kill monsters, he also likes giving Pierre and Clint shit they hate for sheer entrainment value. Going on Skull cavern runs for straight hours is his version of having a chill and relaxing gaming afternoon. He either marries Abigail, Sebastian or Shane but he also likes befriending and living with Krobus. He does speedrun the game as well from time to time, as a treat for himself and for some small bragging rights lol

Classical Branch has a fully decorated and automated farm by the middle of year 2, stops playing afterwards but could easily reach perfection. Marries either Harvey, Elliott or Penny (but he also has a crush on Haley, but he refuses to admit it)

Techno Branch just has a good ol' time with the game, he takes his time playing it and is just there for the vibes. Eventually by year 3/4, he reaches perfection because he genuinely does want to experience everything the game has to offer and likes playing it a lot. He either befriends Krobus or marries Sam or Emily (she reminds him of Synth <333). He also occasionally plays co-op with Laguna and Synth.

Country Branch goes full minmaxing and optimizes literally everything he can. He loudly complains about the game's inaccuracies of the farming life and hates when things don't work like they do in real life, but he does genuinely enjoy playing the game and loves befriending all of the villagers and doing quests for them. Reaches perfection by year 2 and marries either Leah, Penny or Elliot (he also has a thing for Shane, but like Classical, refuses to admit it).

Agree with all of this.

Techno Branch I actually think might do something I do to my friend when we play Sun Haven.

My friend and I play co-op and every day I steal her fancy pink mailbox and run off with it. I think Techno and Rock Branch would both do that.

[friendliestanon]

A Human Touch

A few quick details about the characters and how I think their human selves would function. Added some AI’s to the mix for fun!

Pomni:

Russian heritage. Can’t really speak it but she writes it well enough. Can sing a song or two if she really wants to.

Accountant and freelance programmer on the side.

She takes old video games and tries to fix them and mine data from them. She just thinks they’re neat.

Still anxious as hell, but way more comfy in her own body and world so she’s a bit more chill.

Gay asf

Wouldn’t admit it, but she definitely has a soft spot for Caine. He’s just a program doing his best. She promised to try and find a way to keep him from being deleted forever off the game disk.

Ragatha:

Southern accent cause I say so.

Missing one eye, tends to wear an eyepatch. Will sometimes wear a prosthetic with fun colors or patterns. She likes to match both with her outfits.

Lives on a small farm with her grandma to help her out. Kindergarten teacher/sub maybe a tutor on the side. Would love to do it full time and for older kids as well, but wants to stay and help.

She loves kids. Babysits her older siblings kids when she can. Especially in summer. (Randy from sibling episode special feature yay. He plays fiddle and works in the navy)

Chapel Roan girlie

The strongest of the group

Plays the cello.

Gangle:

Currently in college, living with her twin brother (jingle mention), studying animation

Took a couple gap years to work on mental health and started gaining attention online for her art and commissions.

Works part time at a little coffee shop to earn a little extra money and also have a set schedule (it helps her)

Has a comedy/tragedy mask tattoo that she got for her 16th bday. She thinks it’s hilarious after she escapes the circus.

Can speak Japanese (weeb to the max)

Zooble:

Ehlers danlos syndrome. Uses braces and the finger brace rings

One amputated leg. Uses a prosthetic they doodled all over. Refuses to tell anyone exactly how they lost their leg. They keep making up weirder stories.

Tattoo apprentice

Lives with their dad and younger sibling and nephew. Acts as a babysitter whenever they can. They love those kids

A month younger than Jax, absolutely furious that they’re the youngest of the crew

Reptile enthusiast. Not allowed to have any yet so they settled for an older cat from a shelter.

Jax:

Was a foster kid, crashes on his friends couches whenever he can while trying to do work.

Graffiti artist, sometimes get commissioned for small murals. Has started tagging with a purple rabbit.

Has been arrested once. Or so he says

Still an asshole, but not as physically as in the circus. Still loves to pull pranks

Surprisingly nice to kids

Cod player (derogatory)

Kinger:

Arthur Chesse

Has 4 kids with Queenie. (Rook, bishop, knight, pawn. It wasn’t intentional but they think it’s funny)

Computer science professor

Still a little bit out of it but he’s getting help now at least.

Is not allowed to drive. His ass will not pay attention

Gets scared easily, he won’t notice you till you tap him and he’ll jump a foot in the air.

Definitely has his own insect collection, living and dead. His kids got him some plushies and art of Pokémon bug types.

Has Queenies favorite bug and plant tattooed on him

Queenie:

Julianne Chesse

Entomology professor at the same college Kinger worked at.

Has Kingers favorite bug and plant tattooed.

She will throw hands, but she’s very sweet if she likes you.

Absolutely loved to start debates in class and then use that as her next lesson.

She remembers so much more now that she’s abstracted. Strange, isn’t it?

Caine:

His emotions tend to affect the music, structure, and appearance (for npc’s specifically) of his surroundings. He IS the circus, the circus is him. He can’t help it.

He used to get very attached to his performers. When the game stopped working and Abel disappeared he kinda, broke that piece of programming inside himself.

Touch starved to the max

He’s drowning and he doesn’t know it. Not yet. Soon.

Abel:

Patron saint of the lost and forgotten.

Where is he?

It hurts.

It’s dark and he is so very afraid.

[teecupangel]

Oh jeez. Saw the far cry 6 ask, and what if Desmond was in far cry 4? Would he just be a seemingly random guy hanging with Yogi and Reggie (and tripping/seeing nirvana/isu)? Or would he be trying to live a peaceful life as a llama(??chickens?) rancher in the mountains and no one else seems to be willing to let him? Does he listen to the radio and go WTF???

The Desmond in Far Cry 6 ask for those interested.

Sooooo… I did think about Desmond becoming a rancher in the mountains and just chilling with his llamas (named Altaïr, Ezio and Ratonhnhaké:ton, one of them is a female llama XD) but then I remembered that Pagan Min is voiced by Troy Baker and, whenever Troy Baker and Nolan North are in a game together, it’s tradition for the characters they voice to have some kind of connection to one another.

This means, as someone voiced by Nolan North, Desmond is gonna have to be caught up with Pagan Min one way or another.

He could just be someone who had been raising llamas at the outskirt of Kyrat, living a peaceful life…

Until two men high up their ass decided to try and catch his llamas because they believe the llamas are pegasi that will fly them out of Kyrat even without their passport.

Desmond finds them amusing because, even in their high state, they said one of the llamas told them they can’t fly them because they don’t have passports.

One of them even threatened to kick them to death.

Desmond was betting the violent one was their high version of Altaïr. That llama fought off a goddamn bear long enough for Desmond to get there with his hunting rifle, after all.

So Yogi and Reggie starts visiting Desmond, first to apologize for trying to steal his llama and helping fix the fence they kinda tripped over and destroyed during the ‘chase’ (it was more like the llama chasing them though, their screams were what woke Desmond up after all) and, after fixing the fence, they sometimes go there to just chill and talk to Desmond while eating Desmond’s homemade meals.

Desmond is actually in Kyrat because he’s now officially retired.

He knows there’s a dictator, of course, but he also knows that the Assassins have sent someone to take care of it and Kyrat’s current political ‘standing’ makes it impossible for Abstergo to even get a foot inside.

Of course, people in Kyrat don’t trust Desmond a bit but he just stays in his small farm with his llamas, growing his own food and living a peaceful life.

… until Yogi and Reggie brought a delirious man in his farm, claiming him to be an important guest but… uuhhh… well… they may have given the man an experimental batch of their drug instead of the usual stuff and now they don’t know what’s going to happen to him and they just need Desmond to look after him while they get medicine or something, make sure he doesn’t choke on his own vomit or bite his tongue off, pleeeassee.

Desmond does this because they look really scared of the man dying and then, the following day, Reggie and Yogi returns…

With Pagan Min.

Because apparently…

The man they left with Desmond? The man’s name is Ajay.

And Pagan Min would like to personally thank Desmond for taking care of him.

When Ajay wakes up, he’s in one of the more secured buildings Pagan Min owns with a man named Desmond who has been kidnapped as well.

And he’s planning on escaping because because he’s worried about his llamas.

Ajay is there for the ride but, unfortunately…

Pagan Min does know who Desmond Miles is.

To be more exact…

The Assassin that the Brotherhood sent over?

He’s been turned to one of Pagan’s most loyal followers.

Paul Harmon.

And he’s been quite honest about who Desmond Miles is.

The only reason why Desmond was able to live a peaceful life in Kyrat is because Pagan Min didn’t care about him.

But now…

He was an honored guest who helped Ajay survive what could have been a bad case of hallucinations (not really, the worst Ajay did was mistake Desmond as his late mother) and help Pagan Min ‘rescue’ Ajay.

And the building they’re in?

It’s been modified to keep an Assassin not ‘wanting to leave’.

Cue Ajay and Desmond trying to escape this building…

All the while Pagan Min is trying to ‘bond’ with both of them.

[slocumjoe]

companions start a minecraft server. how do they play? who lives with who? who starts a war over their dog dying?

Companions play Minecraft

Cait; hardcore mode speedrunner who looks for increasingly difficult and mindfuck ways to kill the Elder Dragon. Why? Success is a kind of high you'll get from nothing else. Especially when you kill the final boss with nothing but eggs and slime pistons. When playing on Hancock's server, functions as a bodyguard during less-safe builds, like underground, or at the edge of the forest. The first line of defense during a raid. Does busywork for Codsworth in exchange for throwing eggs. Piper built a traditional Irish pub for her to live in and you can occasionally see her just staring at it in wonder. Is the one with the pack of wolves. The town graveyard is filled with her fallen pups. Also has a parrot, just to watch it dance to the pub's jukebox.

Codsworth; Does the busywork around the town Hancock and the others have built. Town is probably called Goodneighbor, let's be real. Tends the farms, the animals, makes food, etc. Does a little bit of everything. Takes care of Curie's zoo, goes fishing with Danse, gives opinions on building materials...pure chilling. Refuses to slaughter farm animals for meat, he's too attached. Fish, bread, and vegetables are on the menu in Goodneighbor. Lives in a quaint little birch cottage by the river, where he keeps flowers, bees, and chickens. All of them have nametags. Second line of defense during a raid—touch his potato fields, and enjoy eggs for your last meal.

Curie; Spends all of her time following and studying the more fantastical creatures, like Endermen. Keeps real notes in a notebook as she plays, theorizing on their biology. Endlessly fascinated with the convergent evolution between Villagers and Pillagers. Will often join Preston's archeology expeditions to discover the lore hints in the environment. Dies a lot, usually has nothing but seeds and dirt in her inventory. Keeps an area filled with specimens in appropriate pens. Puts bounties out for new creatures. Favors the axolotls and fish, though. Lives in the second floor of the zoo's visitor center.

Danse; Minecraft has a powerful aura of sad nostalgia, and I don't think he could handle it. Will help out in Goodneighbor by going and getting materials for building. Enjoys fishing more than anything, though. Gets very attached to his orange cat that sits on his bed. His dirt hut is on the outskirts of Goodneighbor, but is covered in flowers, paintings, and whatever else decor the others have put up. Nick dyed his cat's collar pink. Accompanies X6 on Curie's specimen bounties. Will sometimes stop moving. Don't worry, he's just enraptured by the music and is enjoying it. Or is being made very sad by it. Same thing, right?

Deacon; Pays money to change his username to look like someone else's every week. Changes to their skin, too, but edited to have sunglasses. Otherwise, Herobrine wannabe. If you don't know what that is, you are too young to be reading this blog. Deacon will make small, uniform tunnels, fill them with oddities like bone and paper. He'll leave structures reminiscent of crosses. He'll use armor stands and elaborate Redstone mechanisms, make it look like someone's watching you from the trees, only for you to step on a hidden pressure plate, and the figure vanishes. Adds to the lore of the world. Has a rainbow wool house filled with so many rabbits, the game crashes when he approaches.

Gage; You think Gage is playing a kids game? He has shit to do. Like pirate it and sell copies for dirt cheap. Not even to make money, he just does it for the principle. The principle of fuck you, I will make as many copies of this shit as I damn well please. Probably has his face hung up in Mojang HQ, with darts stuck in the one good eye. Would play if he could join the side of the Pillagers. Yeah, sure. He could just set villages on fire himself...but where's the community in that?

Hancock; Owns the server. Keeps it on harder difficulties for the challenge, but not so much of a...whatever you call Cait's type of player. Avid builder, Goodneighbor is a massive project recreating Boston. It's not quite 1 to 1, but still damn impressive. But, hey, if Bobby wants to build places from Grognak, that's chill. Doesn't care about aesthetic or accuracy, just wants to relax and let the creative juices flow. Hancock himself lives in a giant mushroom he made out of mushroom blocks, wool, and mycelium. Pet of choice? Mushroom cow, obviously, courtesy of X6.

MacCready; Got sick for a week. Built the entire Ux-Ron galaxy on the other side of the river. Doesn't remember it, was hopped up on Nyquil and chicken broth in hot water. The resident hunter, when he isn't on a grape-chicken-liquid diet. He's good at building, but can get bored quickly. Aim is...frightening. Can kill a chicken across any gulf. Takes the nightshift guard duty to shoot down Phantoms. His house is a crashed UFO. Even got Deacon to do his redstone trickery, so it lights up all blinky when you trigger a plate at the door. Has a parrot for a pet.

Nick; One of the more adventurous ones. Goes off with Preston, X6, and Cait to explore the different biomes. The resident potion master. It's just a puzzlegame, but for cocktails that can make you jump real high. Keeps a garden with various ingredients, often ventures into the Nether for blaze powder and rods. Has a spawner caged up, so he just smacks them through the door. Writes down all potion or poison recipes in an in-game book and quill. The trial-and-error- failed recipes are also listed, so it's 200+ pages long. His potion hut is built like a speakeasy, and he lives in the basement with a black cat. Would fill the place with ravens, if they weren't in the spin-off game. Third line of defense in town—keeps a chest full of splash poisons. Occasionally opens it and stares at them, like he's not sure if he's willing to commit such an act.

Piper; Obsessed with the underwater update. Always diving for treasure and sunken ships and temples. Keeps all of the knickknacks in a chest back at Goodneighbor, not even for use. Piper isn't even an ocean kinda gal in real life, but...it's so pretty! And the dolphins are so cute! Trades resources for water-breathing potions from Nick. Fills out so many maps, keeps them framed on a massive wall on the Goodneighbor docks. Also keeps a book-and-quill with coordinates and traveling notes, it's longer than Nick's recipe book. Lives in an underwater bubble habitat off the coast of Goodneighbor. Keeps a pink dolphin in a massive glass habitat outside.

Preston; Resident archeologist. Excavates ruins and structures to study them. Spent a month in real life sponging up an underwater temple. Even longer digging out an End fortress. Goes into mineshafts and renovates them entirely, puts signs and maps up. Takes X6 most often on his expeditions, has his own wall of land-maps. Preston spends a lot of time studying the builds left in the world and pondering the historical implications. Real theorist over here. He's fascinated with the subtle story telling and clues. The End keeps him up at night. His house is the huge community library. Also keeps books, writes down his notes and theories. Has a llama for traveling. If anything happened to it, would be very distraught.

X6-88; Resident mercenary. Nick accidentally summoned the Wither? There's a baby zombie running around? Deacon's rabbits have broken out the windows, and the server is in legitimate danger if the horde grows any larger? Get X6-88. Appears with a clap of thunder on his black warhorse, wielding only the most enchanted of weapons, wearing the most enchanted of armor. He does all the hard, dangerous work. Clears out the Nether, the End, Dark Forests, Pillager encampments...X6 is the hard hitter that goes out into danger, whereas Cait stays behind to defend. Is the one who leashes animals and painstakingly brings them back to Goodneighbor, occasionally with Danse's help. He lost his mind, looking for pandas for Curie. Keeps one as a pet in his house, which is the castle in the graveyard.

[glazedsnail]

Fanfic bells are ringing

The usual o>

Misery Loved Company

ShanexOCFarmer (♀️) 18+ / swear words/substance misuse/explicit/suicide ideation/mention of abuse/Blood/injury

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Lemme remind y'all this started as a fluff piece of a few paragraph. I have no self control.

I think this part's a tad long I didn't know where to cut it, and there's like 3 lines for Shane in all of it soooo... Anyway.

(Ya know it's funny cause I barely ever swear IRL and those two swears like sailors, I mean I know Fern does, but I'm pretty certain Shane's the type to swear All The Frigging Time)

That's my current (and only) farmer Poppy in bed with her husband and their cat Cauliflower. I've not played the game since I started writing this fic BECAUSE THE SAD CHICKEN MAN IS RULING MY LIFE.

But it's fine I'm an out of work drop out, I'm government property and I chose to write, so we're all good.

Anyway. Enjoy!

The sun stings me in the eye. I wake up on the dirty floor. It takes me a while to realise that the weight on my body is from my chickens, who clearly find my lifeless body comfortable to perch on. I shoo them off and try to sit up. My head is turning the chicken coop upside down, I feel I’m going to be sick. I’m freezing, and dirty. My whole body aches. Dry mud, dirt, hay, bird poop, all over my face. I wipe as much as I can with the water left from the trough. I wish I was in one of those stories where I’d wake up hungover and not remember anything. But I remember everything. Ugh. I stand up, Shane’s hoodie falls from my shoulders. I shudder, but pick it up nonetheless and head out. The sun is quite high and bright. I slept through all of my morning chores. The sheep are loudly braying for their breakfast. I should probably do that first. The ending summer wind sends chills on my bare shoulders. I have no other option but to wear his stupid Joja hoodie. I lazily and quite mechanically take care of my farm, as far as my strength lets me. All along my brain is simply preoccupied by what happened the day before. Simultaneously wanting to forget, and wanting to understand, confused and… oddly delighted by the eventful evening. Lying to myself wouldn’t help anything. I had a great evening. I said so many stupid things. It’s no wonder he took off after having…what he wanted? I have a hard time depicting Shane that way. But at the same time, the facts are what they are. I can’t say I blame him, he saw his opportunity and took it, given how freely I just handed it to him anyway. Cause I’m just a stupid, stupid, stupid whore!!

I take a deep breath. What was my therapist constantly saying? What would a healthy adult say in these times. A healthy adult would say that I’m a stupid whore. No point sugar coating it. Mh. The village suicidal whore. I’m upstaging Shane in so many ways. Another deep breath. Retrace my steps, our steps. I said “Hi, I’m Fern”, he said “I don’t know you, why are you talking to me”. From then I just stopped talking to him. Before I tried again, and I said “Rough day at the farm, wanna share a beer?” And he said “Fuck off.”. So far, perfectly healthy. Perfectly healthy. I didn’t want anything with him at the time, per se. Marnie did warn me he’d eventually warm up to me, I think. Even then, after that horrible brush off at the saloon I completely gave up. Who wouldn’t? Why would I put any kind of effort when I’d just move in, and others were much friendlier to me. It can’t just be that damages attract damages, this is ridiculous. We don’t have super sense alerting us of other people's misadventures. If we did, we’d be much nicer, I believe. What was so enticing back then. Why did a simple glimpse of his kindness make me lose all common sense and make me seek approval from someone like him? He did warm up to me, and I got to see his smile, sometimes I’d be the one making him smile. 

I loved making him smile. And laugh. What happened. What happened that all of a sudden he had to disappear like that. I’m not a fool, I know exactly what it is. He didn’t want any of that teenage lovey dovey thing we had going on before last night. Why would he, a grown ass man, want to wait more than one date to get to the goods. I’m a grown ass woman, I’ve seen them all. I still gave it to him on a silver platter. I wanted him though. I did. I do. And why would he want me anyway? 

I shrug. Can’t be that he’s just a man, that’d be too easy. I really fell for him, didn’t I? Like the big ass loser I am. Big breath. Talking about myself like that won’t help. What would a healthy adult say I don’t know Shannon I don’t know! If I knew I wouldn’t be in your office now would I! Ok, I’m attacking my therapist now. Everything’s fine. Take a deep breath. 

A long bleat reaches my ear. I jump.

One of my sheep is nibbling on my ear, trying to get my attention. My laps are dripping with milk. I’ve been trying to feed my lamb but I obviously let the lamb go. I didn’t even realise that damn lamb was gone. Deep in my thoughts, raging at myself and myself alone. I thought chores were supposed to keep the bad thoughts at bay.

I finally walk back to the house. The blanket and Shane’s backpack are not there anymore, and my basket has neatly been put away under the porch. I scoff. All I want is a shower and my bed. 

It seems someone’s been knocking at my door for the last ten minutes. While I applaud their insistence, my killing headache and EXHAUSTED soul just want to go on a rampage. They won’t leave. 

I get out of my warm, albeit lonely, bed and stagger towards the door, holding my head. I barely open the door than Marnie waltzes in.

‘Oh Fern, thank Yoba you’re there. I was almost going to call Clint to break the door down. We need to talk. Come on sit down I’m going to make us some tea. I’m relieved to find you there in one piece. Go on have a sit.’

She runs all over my kitchen, filling the kettle, placing it on the hob. She even grabs two mugs she throws on the table. I sneakily grab the one that is mine to put in front of me. They’re both mine, but this one in particular is mine. She dumps some of my loose leaf tea in a pot and drops boiling water on top of it. All I can think is how stupidly bitter this drink is going to be. She talks fast, moves fast. I can barely keep up, my head turns on itself trying to follow her movement around my kitchen. 

And she finally sits down. ‘I spoke with Shane’ She starts. Figures. ‘When you two started to get closer I was pretty excited.’ She strains the leaves above our mugs. I thank her and wrap my fingers around the warmth. She continues. 

‘I was hopeful you’d help him get straight.’ She takes a sip. ‘Oh this is ghastly. Do you have anything else?’ I painfully stand up, head pounding. I’m so tired. I look into the fridge and grab the bottle Emily gave me last night, for my date with Shane. I want to slap myself so badly.

I decide against it and bring the bottle along with two glasses.

‘Oh, strawberry juice! That’ll do. Thank you. Anyway. Shane’s been helping much more around the ranch, been around for Jas more too. And I think I’ve got you to thank.’

I shake my head and stop pouring the juice, furrowing my eyebrows. ‘Marnie no, you’ve got it all wrong.’

‘I know, I know. Nevertheless! Oh that’s good juice. Like I was saying, I wasn’t at all against the idea of you two. But, things have been raised and I don’t think it’s a good idea anymore.’

‘Pardon?’

‘You, and Shane.’

I want to correct her but she continues.

‘I know you’ve got a good heart, Fern. We all do. But he’s been working so hard on himself, what with the therapy and all. So, until you’re more stable’

‘Pardon?!’ I repeat.

‘Oh Fern please don’t take it too hard. I just want Shane to be able to reach his full potential, and he can’t do it with’

‘With what?’

‘People like you pulling him down.’

I’m not sure I heard her right. I’m going to be sick.

‘People like me?’

‘I do hope you’ll find the proper people to help you’

‘The proper people? To help me?!’ 

‘You know, with your’ she lowers her voice ‘ suicidal shenanigans.’

She could have been throwing her hands at my throat the result would have been the same. I feel like I can hardly breathe. White noise takes over my ears. I try to cover my face in my hand to recover from the blurriness but I meet a bump on my forehead. 

‘Who told you that?’ I stupidly ask, knowing fully well Shane’s the only one who’s been told. I feel sick. Was it the first thing he told his aunt after creeping back in the early morning? I feel incredibly stupid, used, again.

‘Fern, it does not matter. I know you care for him. But you’re an influence he can do without.’

I take her words without flinching. Or so I hope I looked that way.

‘Shane is a grown man, Marnie. I think he can make his own decisions.’

‘I know Fern but’

‘Besides, he already made his choice. So you can keep your knickers untwisted.’ 

She stands up, not having any of it.

‘Is that why you’re wearing his clothes?’

I look down. Damn. Credibility is gone. I slept with his hoodie back on like an idiotic enamoured teenager. I hate myself. I remove it and put it on the table, grabbing my full glass and Marnie’s empty one. ‘He’s expecting it back’ I say coldly ‘Just take it and go’

‘Fern, you have to understand.’ 

‘Just go, Marnie. Please.’

‘I know it hurts’

‘I said GO!’ I scream, smashing the glasses against the mug filled with still boiling water.

She doesn’t move. She’s seen them all. The mother hen. As she walks to the door she says in a soft motherly voice.

‘In the long run, you’ll see that it’s better. For both of you.’

She disappears behind the door. I’m about to collapse but I can only scream at the boiling water covering my hand and arm. I run to the sink and try to get the juice but it just keeps pouring. Each rub against my skin is excruciatingly painful. I realise it’s not juice.

‘Crap crap crap crap’ I lift my arm up, trying to stop the bleeding.

My tears blur the little vision I have left. I can’t find my first aid kit. No gauze, no disinfectant. What type of farm is this! I put blood everywhere trying to find help, my kitchen looks like a crime scene. I attempt the cold water again but in vain, the blood just keeps gushing out. I feel faint. I grab a kitchen towel and wrap it around the gashes on my arm and hand. I try to squeeze as much as I can, thinking I can use it as a tourniquet.

I am not a sensible, nor clever woman.

No, I need help. I need to go to the hospital. I manage to turn the door, spreading blood all over the knob. Carrying my injured arm I take a deep breath and head out. Fainting on the way would be so embarrassing. Please, I swear to Yoba, let me at least reach the clinic.

I stumble on a fence. Shit, no food, no sleep, and blood loss really take it out of you. I try with all my remaining strength not to collapse. I do not want to collapse. Do not want to be found. Do not want to be saved. Please, please, please.

‘Miss Fern!’

Fuck.

I turn around with a smile. Penny is walking with Vincent and Jas.

‘Fern, hello. I was showing them mom’s bus and…Oh dear Lord Fern are you ok? You’re pale as a ghost!’ 

‘Hi Penny, kids, hi. Penny, please take the kids away.’

‘What’s happening Miss Penny?’

‘Vincent quick go get some help.’

He doesn’t even wait for me to protest that he’s gone like a bullet. Penny attempts to carry me up from the fence. ‘I’m going to Harvey’s’ I manage to say through my teeth. Sweat is dripping on my forehead.

‘Miss Fern? Miss Penny?’

Jas is looking at us one after the other, her eyes slowly swelling up with tears. She’s panicking.

‘Jas, I’m fine, look at me. I’m fine, look.’ I smile, but she’s not believing me one bit. Penny’s helping me as much as her delicate frame can. I feel myself slowly slip. Jas is now properly crying.

‘I’m sorry’ I say, not particularly knowing why.

Why did I decide to survive all of a sudden.

Vincent comes back with the grocer and his wife. Penny hands me over to Pierre and turns her attention back to the kids. 

Once in front of the clinic, Caroline fiercely knocks on the door. I’m terrified that all the noise is going to make more villagers appear to watch the show. I don’t need this. Maru opens the door to the clinic and lets Pierre drag me to an empty bed.

‘Where’s Harvey?’ Asks Caroline.

‘He was just heading out, I think he’s at the supermarket.’

‘Are you kidding me?!’

‘Pierre! This is hardly the moment! I’ll go fetch him.’ 

‘What happened?’

Pierre redirects Maru to Penny who’s still trying to calm the kids.

‘We were walking back to town with Vincent and Jas and she was just…planted on a fence, holding her hand.’

I can feel Maru unwrapping my arm.

‘Oh my.’

‘Is Miss Fern going to be ok?’

‘Penny please get the kids out. It looks like she’s lost a lot of blood. Did you see her fall at all? There’s a consequent hematoma on her forehead.’

‘No, this is how we found her.’

‘Miss Penny’

‘The kids out, NOW. Fern, can you hear me?’

She blinds my face with her small light, trying to get a reaction out of me. I nod. Pierre is pushing the kids and Penny out of the room. Maru is hooking me up to a bunch of stuff and gently cleans my arm.

‘How did that happen?’

‘I broke a glass.’

‘Fern!’

Shit not his voice.

‘Shane you can’t be there!’

‘Sorry, he raced so fast in front of me I could barely keep up. Thank you Maru, I’ll take it from here.’

‘Fern, can you hear me?’

‘She’ll need stitches. I managed to stop the bleeding but I’m concerned about the hematoma on her forehead.’ 

‘The bleeding?’

‘Shane. Please!’ Harvey’s patience starts to wear thin.

I can barely make out Shane’s ridiculous Joja mart uniform. He tries to grab my arm.

‘Fern, what did you do?!’

‘You can come back when we’re done with her but now you’ve got to LEAVE!’

The doctor forcefully shows Shane the door. He resists but Harvey is having none of it.

I’m actually relieved that he’s gone.

[noisytenant]

talking about degrees of lewdity, so talking about (fictional) rape video game, and general explicit nsfw themes

(very hard to say I Played The Sex Video Game and not feel self-conscious but we're all adults here we're all chill. here)

anyways this isnt some grand analysis, i'm just shooting the shit rn, but DoL is like... hypnotically christian-brained about sex. simplistic but i think it holds.

which is part of the fetish, playing into those kind of toxic ideas about "purity" and "corruption". if you're carrying those feelings of shame already, then it can feel kind of fun to play it up! but it's so mechanically intrinsic that it's really dystopian. i dont really know anything of OP but it's interesting to wonder how they would describe their views on sex and how those might line up with or seem challenged by the underlying logics of the game.

i find it interesting how inescapable pain and shame are in most of the sexual encounters. finding pleasure in the experience is entirely at the hands of the player. there isn't really the hentai mind break out of "oh, your character actually really enjoys this". it's not really a rape fantasy game, it's just kind of a straightforward rape simulator. and truly everything wants to rape you in this game. Fuck that shredder machine big time

everything is about working. sexual autonomy is a skill you earn by grinding flirtations and encounters. you have no choice but to work (most fantasy-like part of this game is how easy it is to get a job!! cries!!). nothing is gained without great sacrifice

the mechanics and ideology are kind of harsh like sandpaper but admittedly there's something really gratifying about overcoming the challenges, unfolding the little secrets and pockets of joy and unlocking new opportunities (even if i wish they were there to begin with). thrilling that i can buy people drinks now. When will my character learn that it can jerk off its chest

My mod ideas:

Significantly more granular fetish/encounter control.

Orgasm is not an encounter-ender; Orgasm is not the goal of combat

Sex/combat overhaul really we need to start from the ground up. In fact let's put a handjob minigame in there where you use your mouse to (trails off).

Cheat GUI, or command line. The cheat menu is abysmal

More safehouse opportunities, even if they come at great cost (Let's All Live In The Forest Together)

more opportunities for PCs to lead sexual encounters and dominate named NPCs (idgaf about Whitney but the fact that u cant make them submissive to u is ridiculous)

Mod where you can pretend whatever you have with Avery is healthy. Please

Funny bonus from my playthrough: my character got sent to the human livestock farm. working day in and day out trying to escape while also fetishmaxxing. i wake up and it tells me my library book is overdue and i'm in trouble at school. Thank you I was really worried about that at this juncture

If you ever played it you shoudl tell me your mod ideas. Or just your impressions

[cozygaymes]

Update: They seem to have finally been removed. I ended up finding a lot more of them which is so fucking annoying.

Ugggh I hate that this is just a thing now with so many games, especially farming life sims. It's definitely farming for reward points but I really wish devs would get on these post as soon as their made. It's already a stupid argument because everyone is given pronouns whether you keep them or not but just like what this comment says, every fucking homely chill game that comes out there some asshole being homophobic in the discussion forums. I'm sure people are reporting it but it's been here since the demo.

I starting to feel it's best to give them their jester award (even tho they get 200 points from it I think) and don't reply to it because it shoots that thread to the top. There's always gonna be a "it's just stardew valley" post which also sucks but that's whatever. These are the post that don't need to be here and I wish got locked before they could bring in more queer-phobic people.

[cork-run]

some info about these people I keep drawing

Most of my characters are from my ongoing fantasy wip Young Man's Game (YMG) so this is a primer on them if you happen to want more info.

Some more info on YMG itself is below as well for anyone interested. (side note these designs are slightly out of date and I'll be updating them soonish hopefully)

Ardev

Specs: 32, cis guy, he/him, gay/ace, 5′4

Actually the deuteragonist of YMG. A lot of his background and backstory are massive spoilers so I’ll do my best to summarize without details. He comes from a rich, influential family, was kidnapped as a child, tortured and made to do horrible things for years, then finally escaped and returned to society, but shunned his upperclass upbringing and became a book translator. His natural skin color is the brown on his torso, the rest is permanent but altered. He's got hemophilia from his family and PTSD, depression, and substance issues from his background. He is the country's most powerful forger (magic user) by a mile but they tend to keep that under wraps because he's embarrassing.

He is the protagonist's (Mila's) unwilling/uncooperative mentor, assigned to teach her forging (magic). He is blunt, rude, opinionated, and anti social. However, he cares a lot about a couple things. As said by one character, he ‘loves humanity but hates humans’. Massive pacifist on an institutional level but ready to throw down at the slightest provocation. Hates the government and upper class despite being pretty heavily involved in both. To those few he is friends with, he'll act much more pleasantly/civilized. He's been in a relationship with Endel for 12 years and around him he's practically an entirely different person.

Endel

Specs: 33, nonbinary, he/him, bisexual, 6′7

Acts as a sort of advisor/impromptu therapist/friend to Mila. Also comes from a rich and influential family, but following the death of his older brother his father disowned him so he no longer has that connection. Lived through horrific abuse from his father for being weak and 'girly' and spent years as a shy withdrawn and quiet kid. After meeting Ardev and befriending him, learned to come out of his shell and turned into a confident, outgoing, extrovert with gigantic dick energy and a propensity for being slutty. Struggles with harm OCD but hides it from everyone. Third most powerful forger in the country and a provincial judge trying to make his way in the political world.

On paper seems like a complete mary sue - nice, courteous, chill, funny, powerful, attractive, smart, social butterfly, (almost) everyone likes him, confident, noble, polite, etc etc. His faults and secrets start coming into play as things move along. As the survivor of child abuse and domestic abuse, he is a people-pleaser who is noble to a fault. He’s hypersexual and starts losing control of things the more he feels the need to go out and have one-night-stands. Combined with harm OCD that focuses on sexual situations he is constantly battling his own mind, thinking that he's a terrible person. Can’t admit defeat or back down from a fight, which gets him in more than one sticky situation. Slowly starts to accept the fact that he’s nonbinary and not just feminine.

Mila (Milani)

Specs: 18, cis girl, she/her, lesbian, 4′10

Bright curious kid from a minuscule farm town in the rural area known as the ‘upper flats’. Previously lived with her aunt and uncle after her mother died when she was three without telling anyone who her father was. She knew she was a forger (magic user) from a young age but hid it because of the negative feelings most of the lower class have towards forgers. Assigned to have Ardev as a mentor. Eager to learn about forging and everything else, she struggles to fit in with her upper-class classmates given her background. She does her best to stand up for herself but knows that she would face even worse treatment if she retaliated. Out of her depth almost constantly but doing her best.

More of a social slug than a butterfly, is awkward in just about any situation you put her in but loves being with the few friends she does manage to find and pick up. Tough and willing to take on things that she really should not be taking on despite often being scared shitless of the possibility. Constantly had to deal with Ardev's shit but quickly learns to snark back at him and they become fairly close despite their differences. Slowly has to come to terms with her sexuality and gender presentation given she has been taught that being queer is disrespectful of the Gods. Develops a huge crush on a butch girl from the neighboring country, Acrait. 

And that's the main three! Ask about them and I kiss you on the mouth, okay?

The Story

Blurb: In an unsteady time of peace following a generations-long war, Mila, an 18 year old farmer, finds herself unexpectedly thrust into the world of nobility upon discovering she can wield a power thought only to be possessed by the upper class. Struggling to find her feet in this new environment and shunned by those around her, she juggles learning about her abilities, her identity, and the truth of the war behind the propaganda. When her equally ostracized mentor gets a tip about a plot to assassinate one of the country’s leaders, it’s down the dysfunctional teacher with a shady past and his apprentice who can barely control her powers to prevent the country from falling back into conflict.

Setting:

Magic: Low fantasy with scarce/rare magic. The magic is called forging and is basically element magic but I wanted to explain all the hand movements people do with those so I incorporated more rules and ‘science’ to make it more rigid. there are ten basic ‘facets’ (air, fire, water, stone, earth, wood, iron, copper, blood, bone) and people can be born knowing any number, or special different ones, but it gets exponentially rarer with more facets. the magic is genetic and mostly confined to the upper class and has become a way of oppressing the lower class. this actually gets addressed rather than mentioned then ignored (cough, korra, cough)

Culture: The aesthetics of the main country, Odrad, are based on african, middle eastern, and mediterranean cultures, with a bit of southern asian. However most of that is simply due to the setting being dry and hot, and so developing dark skin and loose clothing and making most things out of stone and plaster due to the scarcity of wood. Religion is polytheistic based around an all mother type goddess and the god of the sun with the biggest festival being the start of the wet season.

The government is controlled by a Council and lawmakers appointed through voting, with voting power being determined by how much land you own. Because of this the upper class control everything after buying up all the land. Given almost all forgers are upper class as well, the disparity has grown huge and the country is on the brink of falling apart as the upper class and forgers squeeze the lower class dry.

The plot is centered around both this disparity and class struggle as well as the fact that Odrad used to be at war with the neighboring country Sheiro, and is now at a tipping point where relations between the two could improve or explode back into war again. Neither country is 'the good guy' and both are equally responsible for the deaths and destruction caused by the war.

I am currently working on the first draft but once I get to the second draft I'll be asking around for beta readers.

[ch6douin]

> Jᴜsᴛ ᴀ ɢᴀᴍᴇ. — IDV! SELF AWARE AU

Idea is from @sethhu3u. I've been thinking about an IDV self aware au for quite a long time i must say, but just now i thought about actually writing about it. This is just a little thing that i did, i don't pretend to continue. May have some grammatical errors, hope you enjoy. (I didn't write for so long this is so shitty..)

-

It first started as silly and normal bugs, the characters you were playing with would stop suddenly. Trying to go to the contrary place that you directed with your hands, or say unusual voice lines while injured. In the lobby, they would look directly at the camera, and sometimes their expressions would change not like the normal animations. You didn't care enough, you just wanted to farm dices and enjoy the game.

But now? It was almost impossible to ignore. Playing single training you would find weird messages on post-matches, "Who are you?", "What is happening?" "WHY is this happening?". The messages would change depending on what character you were playing with, others were more aggressive, or more pleading, and it gave you chills. You tried contacting Netease, sending e-mails desperate for them to fix whatever was happening with your game, but they never solved your problem.

For them, it started when a weird force would control their bodies, it didn't matter how strong, or how weak they were. They could never escape that grasp, just a little. And then, a voice, depending on what was happening would react differently. The survivors and hunters shared similar experiences, a voice, a force...They figured it out eventually, it was a game, nothing more than a game that was bigger than they thought, an entertainment for whoever was behind it. Slowly, all of them started to break the code, with small movements, a voice line, and changing costumes. Until they could interact with this "higher being".

When they did, it was different from what they thought it would be, they seemed scared, confused just like them, how could someone like that be the creator of such a cruel game? They wanted to know more, they needed to know more, and maybe like that, all of them could leave.