#I should really get back into writing about the catgirl

[bisquicklite]

I don't know if you're open for asks but re Osha's employment:

Chocobo Jockey, 3 days.

I have questions c': such as what happened?? and who was Osha's sponsor?? and is she interested in another loop around the track for Garlemald Cup (no that last one is a bad joke please ignore it!!)

Oh! Oh, I have a pretty solid answer for this! :D (I don't always have super solid answers for things about my catgirl because I often tend have a thought and decided 'I'll figure out what that means later' and then later never comes!)

Osha's career as a chocobo jockey lasted long enough for the ink to dry and for her to complete almost half of an officially sanction race-

Before she had what looked like a fit and fainted off of her bird, breaking her arm and getting a mild concussion in the process. (What actually happened was Hydaelyn decided it was a great time to call her champion for a quick vision trip to talk with the looming Mothercrystal, and really kick start Osha down the path of heroism and adventure. Thanks, Mom.)

So her time as a chocobo jockey ended as quickly as it started. Osha was barred from participating in any further officially sanctioned races until such time as she can show proof that she won't go fainting out of the blue anymore.

As for who sponsored her, I've given exactly zero thought to that because I do not know how irl horseracing and being a jockey works, so this is just spit balling what most likely happened;

First, a little bit of background, Osha had worked various jobs in the Gold Saucer; most notably as a bunny attendant, and in various positions in the stables on location in Ul'dah. She had been working as a stable hand when the last Calamity happened and due to a slew of staffing issues (The Manager of Care suddenly quitting following an existential crisis because, and I quote, "The bloody moon is falling, I'm going to go spend my remaining days drinking rum on the beach!", and several other staffers followed similar reasoning.), Osha found herself as the most experienced and senior member of staff, who was then promoted because someone had to be running the show.

(The former manager did return eventually, and Osha happily ceded the position back to them. She didn't really like having that amount or kind of responsibility, but it is noted by her co workers that she handled the pressures of potential End of Times quite well.)

Osha took a break from working at the Gold Saucer for a year or so. She worked in her father in the mining guild and helped a cousin during the harvest season, and picked up the odd shifts as a GATE keeper at the Gold Saucer.

Eventually the manager she had temporarily replaced approached her with the offer to talk to the right people and get Osha a position as a jockey in the races. Which Osha jumped on the opportunity because, well, why not? She is always opened to trying new things, and she had some experience in unsanctioned races.

Thank you for the ask! :D

(I also don't know what the Garlemand Cup is but Osha would probably get super excited about participating until someone reminded her that she's still not officially allowed to race)

[centrally-unplanned]

Saw this really cool post of a 1982 "SF" (Science fiction but in Japan that included things like anime, manga, tokusatsu, etc at the time) magazine that did a survey of active fan groups/circles at the time - ~woo, precious data! Lets see what we got:

Love to see a good gender breakdown - as is often the case in these things, while it is of course majority men the number of women participating is very strong. You do notice the age imbalance there - many women in their teens and college-aged, but it drops off quickly. I suspect that this is primarily because this survey is right in the middle of the first wave of the "pop SF boom", where more approachable works like Gundam and new manga subgenres were rapidly growing the community. So the older cadre was more heavily men, while the new group is more balanced. However, this is the early 1980's - it might just be that when a woman graduates college she was expected to marry and "settle down" still, inhibiting participation in these kinds of groups. I think it is primarily the former, Japan had pretty rapidly changed in the 1970's and female creative types were commonplace by then, but I won't pretend the latter players no role.

The writing on this page just contextualizes the piece, not much to report, though it does note that "3 people replied 'other' for gender...as a joke!" Sure, jan!

Anyway, on to page 2, what is our poll question of the day...

ロリコンについてどう思いますか? What do you think about lolicon?

....*siiiiiighs* guys I didn't, I didn't look at the second page before typing this up! I just wanted to report the gender data! This just happens to me, I swear -_-

But I can't back out now I guess:

It actually splits the question by gender - men are asked "are you a lolicon" while women are asked "what do you think of guys who are lolicon" - sexists, way to erase the female lolicon. Not actually joking there, it is a quite a thing due to its overlap with rape and dubcon fetishes - but I won't pretend I have expertise on the prevalence of that in 1982 Japan's SF community, even if it you see it today. Anyway, most men are not lolicons (the tallest line), though others fall on a spectrum from interested to "graduated", certainly a choice of words one could make.

Funnily a good dozen say they are called that by others, but not themselves - I believe that is related to the vague line between loli & shoujo aesthetics at the time. Which is important to emphasize, as I always do on this topic - sometimes the word lolicon just means "youthful" or "cute", sometimes it means like high schoolers, and sometimes it means real-deal underage stuff, and you won't know without context.

Meanwhile two women label lolicon men as "cute!", good for those two living their truth, while others are broadly tolerant but have Opinions. Which is fun, because the rest of the page is people sharing said opinions, sorted into "good" or "bad"! Some choice ones:

★ It's a symptom of modern civilization’s sick parts, but also an inevitable phenomenon. It’s better than having a rabbit or cat complex. Don’t lay hands on young girls. Lolicon must remain platonic. (♂/19/)

You see this theme a bit, "symptom of modernity", the new sexual fetishes are a product of a changing world. Certainly up for debate, but also very "in vogue" for the 80's & 90's to worry about that sort of declinist narrative. Then again, guy is a catgirl and bunnygirl hater, not sure we should listen to their shit taste.

On the flip side you get the "natural way of things" types, of which this is my favourite:

★ There’s nothing abnormal about having a dream involving an uncontrollable urge towards pre-teens. Even Romeo and Juliet would have made Romeo a lolicon given Juliet’s age (14), but people don’t think of it that way. Only at that age can girls love and respect men without ulterior motives. (♂/19/)

That last line, you are telling me so much about you with that one!! You can see how this is discourse, right? Like if one side says you are a "symptom of modernity" you ofc respond with "this is how all guys are" and with callbacks to traditional culture.

The "bad" side has a lot of ruthless condemnation, with more than one call for the lolicons to simply die or labelling them worthless scum. The magazine's writers do try to keep the tone breezy but I do think this topic being actually contentious in the community pokes through here. Though this serious one really did undercut herself a bit at the end:

★ I can understand why one person of the same gender might feel admiration or affection for a child or young girl, but for a man to only be able to love much younger women? That’s a mental illness! If they aren’t willing to fix themselves, they might as well die. They’re enemies of women. It's not going to turn out like Nabokov's Lolita. (♀/20s/)

I mean they did also kill jesus Humbert Humbert in Lolita. that was a pretty significant thing that happened. like i understand where you’re coming from here but they very much did kill the Lolita guy.

There is an editorial at the end, and it echoes something one of the comments also states; that the lolicon boom was seen as coming from "hard" SF fans, the people who did the really nerdy stuff. There is a word they use actually which is neat: 根暗/Nekura, meaning someone with a "gloomy root". It began seeing use as a slang for hyper-serious, boorish people in the late 1970's and became a fad to use in precisely 1982 - here is a live record of that! They associate "hard SF" fans with these sort of gloomy types who can't take a joke or appreciate hanging out with the buds at a bar, that kind of thing. From there, and here I am reading between the lines, these fans like a sort of "idealistically sterile" world, and lolicon as a preference (in comparison to Real Adult Women) flows naturally.

I mention this because astute readers might be going "oh, like otaku?" and that word was only just buzzing around at this time - it is typically dated to 1983. The editorial writers note that these nekura-types are nowadays proud of that fact, wearing it like an identity:

A: I’m not really sure why, I don’t fully understand the inner workings of the SF world, but it’s like, out there, hardcore SF fans are considered gloomy. Maybe that’s why there’s this connection to lolicon? B: But surprisingly, everyone’s actually pretty cheerful. In today’s world, the 'dark and gloomy tribe' is trendy. It’s like they’re enjoying calling themselves gloomy, almost as a fashion statement.

So yeah, I can totally see proto-otaku discourse going on at the edges here.

There is a third page but it continues in a similar vein. A bunch of mentions of Hideo Azuma, who I am growing increasingly convinced was more of a lodestone for the lolicon boom than is currently appreciated - he is the ur-reference everyone makes. More discussion of girls in sailor uniforms as a gateway drug, yeah yeah, "is fine as long as its fiction", of course of course, one of the magazine editors remarking he wants "a wife for practical uses but a daughter as a pet" yeah okay we can call it we're done here, no more survey data anyway.

Not the topic I expected to find, but still this is really valuable "primary source data" - you can't trust the literary class fully on these things, having first hand quotes from community members on otaku culture in the era is always valuable.

Sorry if you got tricked into reading this - in my defense I did too!

[strawberrymilk-sunshine]

Watching u <3

I've been working on this for a while. Off and on since late June. Believe it or not, I have actually been having ideas throughout my entire hiatus, it was just a case of not being able to really write anything down...

This is probably darker than some of my other stuff, I just feel like I should say. Please do not read this if you're uncomfortable with this. Thank you, and have a good day/afternooon/night.

Warning(s): yandere behaviors, explicitly fem reader, death, some sexist stuff (it's not as bad as it probably could be but it's there), incel Idia I know he isn't in canon please don't be mad at me for making him one in this fic, delusional yandere Idia, non consentual kiss, blood hemorrhage mention, unwanted comments about reader's body, implied past trauma, doxxing, breaking and entering

It was a long day of boring classes for Idia. Today was one of those days he was forced to actually attend class in person... ew. He hated it, being around people for that long. But he had a test today, and apparently the professor didn't trust him enough to do it remotely from his dorm room.

Luckily though, Idia had something to look forward to. At the end of the day, when he gets back to his dorm room, almost exactly... something he looks forward to all week will finally start.

What is this thing he is so looking forward to?

Well, what other than your weekly livestream, of course!

He loved everything about you.

He knew everything there was to know about you. He even knew your name, despite you hiding your identity behind a fictitious catgirl persona~

(Y/N). (Y/N) (L/N). He loved that name of yours. It felt like honey in his mouth as the words spilled out of him... calling you by your real name without you knowing~

Idia considered you a friend- no, even MORE. He wasn't friends with you, no no no no no! You were his lovely little girlfriend! Cute and submissive and everything... ohhh, he loved you so much. Hearing your voice... listening to you... answering you like you were right next to him... donating to you every time you streamed, copious amounts of money... participating in chat every now and again, to have an actual dialogue with you... he didn't like talking with other people, oh, but he ALWAYS made an exception for you.

You two have even started chatting outside just your streams. He's a mod for your streams now, as well as on your personal server... you were a bit apprehensive about that at first, but don't worry, he convinced you!

One time, you confided in him about some... serious issues you went through irl. It was so cute, imagining you in that situation.

Oh, you've been through so much together... you're practically dating at this point! Oh... but maybe he should actually ask you, just to make sure you know you're dating him. Just in case. Just in case.

Idia happily logged onto your stream, anxious to watch you... and to pop the question later~

But as he logged on... he... he heard you... say... something...

"Sorry I wasn't able to stream last week... something came up in my real life!" He saw your semi-3d avatar smile, responding to your real expression, no doubt. "I know it sounds crazy, but somehow... I'm dating someone!"

At first, Idia decided to optimistically think about how, maybe you're referring to him... but, as the pre-stream chitchat continued... it became obvious you weren't.

...

HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO HIM?!

In a fit of anger, Idia unsubscribed and blocked you on absolutely everything.

...but then, he thought of something. A nice plan... one that would hopefully make you dependent on him... you'd dump whatever loser you're dating right now... and he would be your only source of comfort.

He unblocked your accounts on his main... and then, he logged onto an alternate account, one that doesn't connect back to him in any way; sorta like what you tried to do with your stream persona, but actually unconnected, unlike yours.

He sent you a message from his sock puppet...

Your stream ended for the day, and... you were confused to see a message from an account you didn't recognize. You thought that maybe it was just a fan deciding to message you, as you get that a lot, but once you accepted the message request to see what they sent...

[xNDRWRLDx] : this u?

...you saw... a picture of yourself... one a family member of yours posted a few years ago... you tried your best to make sure that your online persona didn't connect back to your real life at all, so... how... how did this person get this picture?!

As terrified as you were, you chose to ignore this message. About an hour later, you received another.

Despite your thoughts, screaming at you to not give this person the time of day... that last message just set you off. You decided to respond.

[xNDRWRLDx] : ignoring ppl is rude

[xNDRWRLDx] : u know that, right?

[xNDRWRLDx] : or is ur thick skull not able to comprehend that

[xNDRWRLDx] : lmao yeah, thats prob the case

[xNDRWRLDx] : u could get a much higher paying job if u quit streaming & decided 2 use ur tits & ass 2 ur advantage

[xNDRWRLDx] : getting railed all day would b easier than streaming. u wouldnt have 2 pretend u have a personality beyond "uwu im a girl who plays video games arent i cute??"

You suddenly saw a string of numbers appear on your screen in the next message from this person. Is that your IP?!

[n3k0-ebi] : who tf are you??

[xNDRWRLDx] : o right, u said smth abt not being comfortable w/ talking abt stuff like that

[xNDRWRLDx] : lmfao weak much??? cant even take a joke

[xNDRWRLDx] : wat a pathetic excuse of a human

[n3k0-ebi] : whats your angle dude

[n3k0-ebi] : are you just trying to make me mad on purpose? it wont work, so just leave me alone.

What could this person know? Just what you look like in real life?? As much as you don't want people to know, it... it isn't that bad. You're not going to pose like that. You're not even going to give this person the time of day anymore.

[xNDRWRLDx] : look familiar?

[xNDRWRLDx] : just saying u would look adorable laying under me w/ ur mouth agape & drooling w/ ur eyes half shut <3

[xNDRWRLDx] : maybe if u send me a pic of u looking like that i might consider not sharing wat i know w/ ur entire audience

[xNDRWRLDx] : ur choice bitch

You log off for the night, not giving any more thought to this person's likely hollow threats.

The next day, you woke up, not realizing what happened over night.

You took a nice, relaxing, early morning shower...

Strangely enough, as you left your washroom, you could have sworn you'd seen a strange, blue light outside your hallway window. Probably just your eyes playing tricks on you... or light reflecting off something...

You make your way to your living room, and sit yourself down on the couch, comfy in your bathrobe and hair towel. You turn on the tv so you can half watch whatever comes on, and focus the rest of your attention on browsing Magicam.

...

...that's a lot of notifications.

You decide to look through your mentions first, and... you see a post from that account that was messaging you last night. It details your full legal name, your address, your partner's name, your parent's names, your homeland, every personal detail you could think of was listed in this post.

In a sudden moment of not thinking, you decide to message them.

They... they just sent you... a picture of you coming out of your shower... and then another, of you sitting here on the couch-?!

[n3k0-ebi] : what the hell is wrong with you?!

[n3k0-ebi] : you fucking doxxed me?!

[xNDRWRLDx] : i told u it was ur choice didnt i

[xNDRWRLDx] : u chose 2 not send me that pic i wanted

[xNDRWRLDx] : so really its ur own fault <3

You look out your living room window... but you don't see anybody.

[xNDRWRLDx] : ur not responding?

[xNDRWRLDx] : rude

[xNDRWRLDx] : little missy cant think of anything to say huh

[xNDRWRLDx] : idk wat i expected lmfao

[xNDRWRLDx] : typical 4 a female pretending 2 know stuff cant even hide ur identity properly

[xNDRWRLDx] : wat an idiotttt

The next month is a chaotic one.

Being stalked by so-called "fans"... yourself and your family members being sent weird letters and death threats... your regular workplace firing you... your family and friends cutting ties with you... your partner breaking up with you...

...why did this all have to happen...?

Is this your fault...? Maybe if you had just sent that picture... no, no don't even think about it. That person probably would have done this to you anyways...

...oh...

Oh, you... you have a notification. Since what happened last night, you haven't checked any of your notifications, but... this one... it's from someone you trust...

Idia was absolutely enraged. He could barely even believe what just happened. You have nothing. He is the only person in the world offering you comfort and support, and you just... YOU JUST WRITE HIM OFF LIKE HE'S NOTHING?!

[Gloomurai_] : hey, is everything OK w/ you?

[Gloomurai_] : i just saw you havent rlly been online since what happened

[Gloomurai_] : not that i blame you obv

[n3k0-ebi] : hi gloomy

[n3k0-ebi] : things haven't been great... lol.

[Gloomurai_] : i heard youre single again btw

[Gloomurai_] : that must suck

[Gloomurai_] : i hope this doesnt sound too forward but uh

[Gloomurai_] : is there anything i could do to help?

[n3k0-ebi] : definitely not, but thx for offering

[n3k0-ebi] : it's enough to just know you're there :)

...but, all of a sudden, the anger leaves him. Everything leaves him. All rational thought is gone from his head... and he smiles.

"Ortho... tell the vice leader he'll be in charge of Ignihyde for a while."

"What-? Big brother, why would you-"

"I need to go home for a bit." Idia closes the chat log, and stands up from his chair. "I won't be gone long. I just need to... make a copy of a file on my pc back home and bring it back here. That's all."

Ortho didn't entirely believe his brother...

...it's raining.

It's dark, stormy, the dead of night...

And most importantly, you're alone.

You used to like being alone. Not so much now, now you just feel... unsafe.

What with all the death threats, general threats, your home address and real face now being known... you don't feel safe in your own home anymore.

It's not a pleasant feeling, yet it is one you've felt before. One you never hoped to feel again. It's such a terrible feeling, knowing you might not be safe, in the place that you very well should be...

...

There's a knock at the door.

You are NOT going to answer it.

There are a lot of things that can happen in the exact moment of danger. Time feels like it slows down, and you have to make a choice... fight or flight, your natural instincts.

The door is kicked open and you drop down to at least somewhat hide yourself thanks to your couch. Maybe that pepper spray you lost last month is under there??? Hopefully...

And then... you hear a voice. A strangely familiar, sickly sweet voice.

"Ohh (Y/N)~" It calls out... "Where are youuuu~???"

That voice... you know that voice... you've been in a voice call with that voice before... that voice...

It's Gloomy... someone you thought was your friend...

"(Y/N), I know you're in here. Just show me where you are already. I-I won't hurt you~!!"

You frantically run your hand along the floor under your couch, looking for your pepper spray. You can't help but hope it's under there...

You hit something that rolls out from under your couch... it's exactly what you're looking for, but it also shows him exactly where you are.

A blue glow comes closer as the long, flaming hair drapes over your couch, the tips barely touching you as you lay on the ground. Then you see his face... piercing yellow eyes, and a terrifying, sickening smile full of sharp teeth...

"There you are!"

You scramble away from him in a panic, taking short glances at where the small canister rolled...

"There's no need to look so scared, (Y/N)." He smiles. "It's me, Gloomurai, Gloomy, Idia, your boyfriend."

"W...w-what... the hell... are you talking about...?"

"Are you fucking stupid? I think it's really clear what I said, isn't it?" He scowls at you... not just any scowl, it looks like he completely despised you... before quickly returning to a sickly sweet, and clearly fake smile. "I'm your boyfriend. You're my girlfriend. We've been dating for a long time, and I'm going to be taking you home with me now! I love you so much!"

"W-we've talked a few times... a-and I guess we're friends, but... but we aren't dating!!" You yell, clenching your fists tightly. You're absolutely terrified, but you don't want to just agree with him. There's no way in hell you're going to validate this...

"Yes we are. Do you not remember? Is your single braincell working overtime trying to understand what you already know? Aww, cute kitty..." The intruder suddenly pulls something out from his pocket.

He thrusts the object at you as you avoid it by crawling on your hands and knees as fast as you can towards your small canister. You stand up in the best defensive position you can, being sure to hide your spray from this creep.

"Ugh. Why are you so stubborn?? It won't hurt as much if you just stay still!!" He rushes towards you with the object, it's clear to you now that it is a syringe...

You spray him directly in the eyes as he screeches out in pain.

You run for your front door, hoping you can get away while he writhes in pain... but you feel something prick into your neck... and being flushed into your veins...

"YOU BITCH. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?! I HATE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH!!" He screams at you as you collapse. What is this... what in the world would work this fast...?

"...wh..." You try to ask what this is, before you feel a sudden metallic taste in your mouth, and blood begins to pour out...

"You don't need to know what it is. It's better if you don't know." The intruder shushes you. "I love you so much. I love you. We'll be happy together... me and a better version of you... I'll recreate you perfectly."

...he kisses you on the lips. He wipes your blood off of his face as he pulls away... when you realize he's wearing gloves.

"It won't be long before you hemorrhage all your blood... this stuff works really fast~" He smiles. "At least you'll look pretty as you die."

Idia's life entirely went back to normal after that. In fact, it's been a year since what he did.

Your body was found, but evidence to his crime was not.

Idia is a model student at NRC, despite almost never attending class in person. His grades are phenomenal, he hands in all his assignments in time, and he's going to get a good job when he graduates...

And... in his spare time... he's programming.

Idia is programming an artificial intelligence, based on a certain someone he used to know.

His lovely girlfriend.

"Don't worry... we'll be seeing each other again soon... I'm sure of it. I'll do everything I can to make it true... I love you, (Y/N)."

[mousegirlvorecast]

Hey y'all! This is my first actual writing for this blog so it might be a bit rusty but I hope you enjoy!

(CW: hard vore, blood, death, cruel pred, mice, digestion, multiple prey)

The tan-furred mousegirl sits in the wire cage that her feline captor had dropped her in. She looks around at all the other mice present; she seemed to be on the younger side. Most were talking happily, but a few seemed to be looking for exits. One stood in the corner with a big scar across her eye.

All at once the room shook, not like before when other mice were dropped in; but like the cage was being shaken. Light poured in as an orange haired catgirl took the top off of the enclosure, her amber eyes looking at each of the mice analytically. She grabs the tan furred mouse, and a smaller white mouse with red eyes and holds them both in the air by the scruff of their neck. The white haired mouse is frozen in fear; but the tan mouse is squirming hard enough to cause the claw pinching her neck to dig in

The cat grins wide and can’t help but lick her lips before addressing the crowd

“Greetings little mice~ don’t fret; I know being in this cage isn’t ideal, but I can’t just let you all go! That would be such a waste of such cute specimens! So I have a little game I want to have you all play~ you all will fight in a little competition; and the winner gets to scamper free!”

The crowd of mice stirs with excitement—for the most part. A few mice don’t seem all that interested; after all, this setup isn’t all that bad, and they get free food and water whenever they want. A few mice are still wary, and the mouse with the scar hasn’t moved from her place.

The cat smirks and puts the two chosen combatants into a specialized cage, in opposing waiting rooms with a closed off center area in sight through the clear plastic barriers. In the center of the middle room there seems to be a hole in the center. The cat clears her throat and speaks loud enough for both cages to hear her perfectly

“The object of the game is simple! Push your opponent into the center hole and you win! That’s it~”

The game seemed deceptively simple, and the tan mouse looked up at the cat through the wire ceiling suspiciously… but she isn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth. The cat counts the two down and when she says go the plastic barriers are lifted, and the catgirl sinks below where the mice can see. Both mice run to the center and awkwardly start to tussle. The white mouse is smaller and weaker and easily gets pushed to the ground. Careful not to slip, the brown mouse pushes the white mouse over to the hole; and the white mouse doesn’t do much to fight back; after all if she loses she goes back to a comfy and safe life in the cage. The tan mouse watches her opponent slide down the hole and smiles wide.

SQUELCH

Her celebration is quickly interrupted by a thick wet sound. Moments later the catgirl rises back up with two white feet kicking out of her mouth, along with a long pink tail. The tan mouse watches in horror as the cat gulps down the loser, who squirms feebly in her throat.

GLLRK

“Mmmm, just as delicious as I had hoped~ it seems subject 037 is our victor! Now then, up next to face the previous victor is…”

She reaches in and grabs a larger mouse, one who looks nice and strong, and plops her down in the cage, back in the waiting room.

“Subject 012! Now then, since the stakes are properly set, I’ll inform all of you that if no fight takes place then both of you will be swallowed~ got that?”

both of the mice nod nervously. 037 stares at her opponent and starts to panic. She won she should be free; can she really kill again just to escape… before she can think any more the plastic barriers are removed again and both mice run for the center. 037 can’t exactly overpower this mouse, and gets pinned to the wall. Right before she is about to get pushed to the floor she kicks 012 in the gut, causing her to double over in pain. Desperate for a way to stop her opponent from just overpowering her, 037 leans down and grabs 012’s cock, starting to jack it off. The grey mouse blushes and squirms but has been so pent up lately she can’t help but grind into the smaller mouse’s hand. Slowly but surely, 037 pleasures her opponent while discretely pushing her towards the center. Right before the mouse is able to cum, the tan mouse cries out an apology and pushes her into the pit, hearing that same wet smack as before.

SQUELCH

The cat lifts up like before, but 037 notices her going just a bit higher than before, raising up directly over the poor mouse before biting down on the morsel in her mouth.

SNAP

Blood and gore rain down all over the two time victor. The tan mouse—now stained in a dark red—gags at the sensation and the scent, and watches as the mangled and squirming mouse above her gets pulled into the cat’s maw. But it’s fine… she just has to keep winning…

The cat grabs another mouse, the one with a scar over her eye, and smirks. This’ll be over soon, she can tell. The same process as before is ran, but this time when the plastic doors open up, the scarred mouse doesn’t scamper out as all the others did. She walks out with confidence, staring at the blood soaked prey before her. 037’s heart is racing, and she tries to run away but is quickly cornered.

The poor defenseless mouse squeaks out a plea for mercy

“Please! I—I need to live! You can’t do this!”

The scarred mouse just rolls her good eye and places a paw onto her opponents neck

“Is your plan to beg for mercy from every mouse that catches you? Pathetic.”

037 is lifted up into the air, her face turning a deep red from a lack of air; and is hoisted over the pit

“Last words would be wasted on you, I hope for your sake that you die quickly.”

And with that the scarred mouse drops 037 down. She takes a gasp of air and closes her eyes tight; falling for a moment before…

THUMP

She lands on the rough tongue of the catgirl, drool dripping down onto her head. Her feet are at the edge of the cat’s throat, and her tail has slipped in already, with the flesh around it pulsing, trying to pull her downward. The cat bites down gently, enough to pin her by her neck, as she stands back up, giving the blood soaked mouse a good view of both the arena and of the cage with the rest of the mice who are all horrified. The scarred mouse is looking away, preparing for her next match. She feels the thick tongue under her lapping at her fur, the feline sucking all the rodent blood off of her. Then, almost as quick as she fell, she feels herself slip back, with a loud

GULP

She SQUEAKS and scrambles for any leverage, but cannot help but slip downward into the cat’s maw. Her throat is tight around the mouse; squeezing her from every angle. She squeaks and cries but every time she opens her mouth more thick warm spit rushes in. It isn’t long before she falls into a hot humid chamber, which reeks of mouse blood. She lands with a splash and takes a moment to orient herself. She feels around but can only find a bit of tattered fur and a few bones; and for good reason. The tan mouse can feel the acids she is soaking in start to burn at her skin, starting with her ears.

GLLLRRRN

As she bangs on the stomach walls, it growls and groans in protest. The mouse is pushed back into the acid as her captor lets out a burp, causing the stomach walls to squeeze in on the mouse. Despite her efforts her consciousness is quickly fading; and what is left of it is in pure agony as her body is melted to the bone. In a last ditch effort to prevent pain, she decides to dip her head under the acids, letting herself be taken completely. It isn’t long before her brain is overtaken by acids and she is left just a floating corpse, crushed by the next mangled body which falls down into the gut.

Many hours and a huge squirming gut later, the cat swallows the last loser, savoring it’s flavor as it cries out for mercy. The victor looks up at the cat with her one good eye

“I’ve done your dirty work again… now you hold up your end of the deal and let me go”

The cat giggles and moves in close; the mouse does not flinch

“But these morsels are so much tastier when they think they have a chance! How about this… you tell me about one more nest and help me eat them and I’ll let you go!”

The mouse sighs, she knows this won’t be the end…

“Deal”

[toxicmetalexpo]

hey, I just wanted to say ur deanna comic hurt so bad. it rly encapsulated so many feelings of mine, that I'm unlovable, destined to be alone forever, that i hurt the people closest to me. that deep inside where I can't see, I'm actually a vile horrid little thing. and, of course, that I hate caves and squeezes.

i love ur comic so much because it speaks to me. I feel like it held a mirror up to my soul and it was so cathartic to see myself there. ur a fantastic artist, sexy catgirls included of course.

idk, i hope this isn't weird. I just thought u should know. I see u.

I kinda held onto this ask for a while because it really hit personally. I'm both glad and sorry that the comic spoke to you. Glad that even one person felt seen and spoken to, and sorry that you have to deal with any of the feelings and emotions that I was working with in this.

Working on this comic was an exercise in confronting my own self loathing, and the way it hampers my interpersonal relationships. I wrote it about a year before I ended up drawing it and the entire time drawing it I kept going "jesus christ what was/is wrong with me this is dark" It definitely got difficult to work on at times and I pulled back on a lot of the even heavier stuff.

I hold a lot of negative feelings in myself, and making art about it is the way that I keep them from swirling inside of me making me fucked up and evil. In a lot of ways making art like this is a bit like an exorcism. I imagine some people see the work I make and think "Jeez, can't you just write about something nice?" under the assumption that I'm intentionally putting myself into these dark spaces. The reality is that I'm letting that darkness out under layers of fiction and character and fantasy so I can go around in my life and be normal.

ANYWAY. Enough sincerity and vulnerability. If seeing this ask entices anyone to read the comic (be warned it is fucking scary) it's somewhere on this blog in full or you can get it in print (how it is meant to be read) from Toxic Metal Press

[ameliedoree]

y'know what? fuck it i'll drop something in here for even a sliver of a chance of getting a shoutout during the patron segment lol (also hi! we met at a friend's wedding back in 2022 and talked about eroge/anime while I was unfortunately Very Drunk, lmao, but your stuff rules and you should always know that!)

i actually stream on twitch! a silly catgirl vtuber like many a transfemme on the internet, but also i focus exclusively on playing games off of handheld hardware! something i care a lot about is going into development history of games/handhelds whenever and wherever i can justify it, so i try to weave that into my typical let's play structure!

hope you're doing well and loving your newfound home in brazil!!

OH YO HELLO HI I REMEMBER YOU, THANKS FOR BEING COOL

yeah shoot thank you for the link! i don't really watch a lot of streamers, but if i happen to catch one of your streams then i'll defs write about it and give ya a shout

and yes things are good here, thanks so much! hope all is good there too

[acephysicskarkat]

Re last reblog:

SP0P's romance writing could have been improved so much if they'd literally just sat down once and were like "what should Adora actually see in this catgirl" and then actually committed to that, because I still have no idea what the answer to that question is supposed to be.

The childhood friendship doesn't work because, y'know, they wrote it to be wildly toxic. C*tra keeps being an asshole both to random people and to Adora specifically, and we never really see what Adora is getting out of it - she mostly just seems to be there to provide support, we never really see C*tra providing it in return.

The "enemies-to-lovers" thing is even worse, because the enmity is so wildly toxic and destructive. They never develop a kind of worthy-opponent thing, they meaningfully team up all of once and it ends really badly, and the last trappings of them still being 'friends' are literally torn away by how shittily C*tra treats her!

Then C*tra does her face turn and the elapsed time from "C*tra actually seeming to care about Adora as a person for once" to "C*tra throws a tantrum because Adora hasn't forgiven her fast enough" is like one episode. Immediately upon them being back on the same side, Adora is once again being treated like her sole job is to soothe the unstable emotions of this toxic catgirl who keeps blaming her for everything.

Heck, even the superficial things we see are things like the claw thing in "Shot in the Dark" that doesn't work because those claws have mostly been used to hurt her.

And that's how you end up with a romance that has squandered all its actual opportunities to feel like an organic outgrowth of this relationship playing the sappy music Very Loudly over Elysian shots of golden light and gentle pollen in the hope that the audience won't notice or care.

[etirabys]

Contents of current writing strategy doc. I come up with something like this about every other year (although I think this is one of the best instances so far) and put <25% chance this goes anywhere, but we must imagine Sisyphus enjoying nanowrimo

Exercises I can do at any time

(30m) Plot one novel badly. Use a random name generator, get 10 characters, and describe their relationships and twistiness across like 100K words' worth of conflict

(30m) Improve a previous plot.

(2h) Go through a novel you rated 5/5 and write what's happening in scene increments. Focus on diffs – treat a scene as a git commit. What's pre and post?

(10m) Look at some "banter/diction that is outside of my range" (from bookmarks, etc) and regurgitate it.

(30m) Do a settings or material dive for 20m and use that to write several hundred words of description of a setting, food table, costume, or something.

(20m) Create future prompts for a settings dive, or collect banter/diction from bookmarks.

Principles I'm relatively sure of

A. Your WIP has to be the most interesting possible WIP you can think of. Otherwise you, a flighty and impulsive person, will be (too) drawn to other things. It's not just "is the overall idea interesting" but "will the scenes that comprise this interest me".

B. You have to notice and tag useful material.

You do need to dump little thoughts (if they are good) consistently into a fragments file that is *well organized*.

When there's a scene you really admire in others, you have to notice and analyze how it was set up.

C. In general you need a more organized directory of "pointers to other people's scenes that I thought were great", reference material, worldbuilding ideas, philosophical issues I want to drive the material conflicts, microsnippets, random observations on writing

D. You need a tight feedback loop. Unfortunately you crave approval, so the writing exercises you do have to be in shareable form.

E. I think you should not start out with high level character sketches. You're bad at translating them into specifics. Instead, start with specifics, let them organically grow, and then reconstruct who they are.

F. You have to continually reenchant your current work. This is the hardest challenge, probably, and I think some ideas are

Zoom way into the current scene that you're stuck on. Can it EVER work? If not, delete it entirely. If yes, what does it need? Put it in. Don't worry about how it affects the plot – the plot can be rearranged. Your enthusiasm is the bottleneck.

More speculative principles

Use Beeminder, it's the best tool you know of to remember your goals and keep on track

...but also, don't force yourself to write, it's toxic to motivation. I'm not sure how to reconcile this and the above. I think the most toxic thing is "forcing myself to work on my WIP" (this kills the WIP – I think?) but it's pretty harmless to work on writing exercises that aren't connect to my WIP

Have to be lazier about plot holes and inconsistencies. Fixing them is expensive and decreases momentum. It is best to buy back goodwill from the reader by being good at what they came here for, which is sad murderous catgirls

[knightotoc]

The only Jedi who's ever gone to the Outer Rim and caused more good than harm is Kerra Holt. In chronological order:

- Tom Veitch foretold the trend (as he foretold everything) when he had City Boy On His First Mission Ulic Qel-Droma try to rescue the princess on Onderon (not technically Outer Rim in current canon but whatever), only to completely misinterpret the situation since the princess was getting kidnapped on purpose to marry her love. Ever since then every Core World Jedi going to the Outer Rim has also misinterpreted the situation and/or not assessed the needs of the people they are trying to help, leading to some dreadful cosmic tragedy. In Ulic's case, this small mistake was soon resolved, but in the back-and-forth of wars that resulted from this mission Ulic fell to the Sith and killed a ton of people, ending with a weak ass redemption of mansplaining forgiveness to a catgirl

- Nomi Sunrider stopped the Sith by... burning down a rainforest

- Revan (or as I like to call them, knock off Ulic Qel-Droma) did stop the Mandalorian takeover out there, but only after falling to the Dark Side themself. And what's worse, they took Malak with them. Half the time they clean up their mess, the other half they make it worse, and either way they go further into the galaxy -- bad idea!

- the Jedi Exile blowed up a planet out there. At least they felt sorry about it

- idk SWTOR 😅

- GOAT Kerra Holt goes to the Outer Rim for a specific purpose (free the people from the Sith governments) and works her butt off to accomplish this, even putting a stop to corrupt drug running from the unhelpful Republic. I have a theory that the only reason future Jedi don't learn from her is (not bc she got written just before the Disney merger but) bc she was never able to return home to Coruscant and teach the others :(

- reading The High Republic rn, and this seems to be the main theme of the series, or at least my main takeaway. In the main storyline, the Republic (+ Jedi) build Starlight Beacon for no specific purpose and do not set up any kind of infrastructure to allow the local people to actually reap its benefits. My man Tia Toon calls them out and nobody listens to him except me. Unconvincing post-9/11 villains the Nihil destroy the Beacon, which falls into a local planet and kills a ton of people. Of course the Jedi had good intentions, but so did Ulic, Revan, and the Exile

- in the side storyline, Cohmac Vitus tries to cleanse some evil artifacts and ends up unleashing the Drengir (aka, sanitized Yuuzhan Vong)! This is what inspired me to write this post bc I just read this, and wtf man! It's such a clear example of "don't mess with the dark side if you refuse to study it." This situation really was fine until the Jedi tried to help! He does feel sorry about it too, I wonder of he's gonna turn evil from guilt

- most famously Qui Gon went into the Outer Rim incidentally to his political mission, saved Anakin while he was there with an elaborate Ben Hur reference, but did not save his mom or consider the affects on the community not to mention the boy, which ultimately lead to Darth Vader

- anakin sand ppl

- you'd think Luke and Leia going to Tatooine and killing Jabba would make things better, but according to the Mando TV show everything is still pretty fucked over there

- I guess Rey caused more good than harm by going to Exegol and killing poor old palpatine; it is sad that Kylo had to die, but she forgot him so ig we should too lol

[pinkbowsandprettyprose]

(catch up with the TWST fandom whenever you have the chance the main story is WILD rn with episode 7)

I'm the anon who wrote that really long Twisted Wonderland AU ask!! Thank you for replying btw. My writing is rusty but I'm really tempted to make it a multi-chapter fic now, but I'm still deciding if it should be set during episode 3 or somewhere between episode 5-7. Anyway some more headcanons that might make it into the fic:

Idia would be so creepy about Ichigo :') His love for anime girls and cats united into a 3D MAGICAL CATGIRL, come to life. Once he mistook Grim for an actual cat an tried to pet him, scaring poor Grim to the point he fainted? Yeah it'd be something like that. If he finds out she can turn into a cat, he might explode. Quiche spots him looking at Ichigo from afar and goes 🤺🤺 BACK 🤺🤺 BACK I TELL YOU. Idia hates Quiche-shi.

Floyd jumpscares Ichigo all the time because she thinks it's Quiche talking at first. She turns around annoyed thinking it's Quiche but then she's just staring at Floyd inches from her face like 👁👄👁. And then when she's ready for Floyd to be there it's actually Quiche. She doesn't know which one is worse. It gives her whiplash. Floyd thinks it's funny; Quiche not so much. Let's pray Floyd never wants to squeeze her.

Not sure if you made it to chapter 3 but like. Ichigo making a contract with Azul because she wanted to get good grades and be in the top 50, so now Quiche has to team up with Yuu and Jack to get her out of the mess she got into along with Ace, Deuce and Grim? Amazign.

OMFG HI ANON yes please write this fic!!

And BLESS thank you for all of this juicy content 👀💖 You’re making me want to get back into the Twisted Wonderland fandom again

[mintychristianwitch]

Anger at the Church

I tend to write these as a stream of consciousness so you’ll forgive me if I don’t cite sources. I am still feeling a lot of anger at my former church and I want to put that to rest but I am still struggling with how to do that. 

Often, those of us who are socialized as women are conditioned to avoid expressing anger because it is not a nurturing, comforting, “feminine” trait. Instead it often manifests as confused sadness, depression, or self-hatred. I am still relatively new at expressing my anger and often wish to march into the churches that I know are spiritually abusive and braid myself a whip because WWJD am I right? I do know that this would get me arrested but because I was socialized to avoid anger and avoid rocking the boat I have a very hard time releasing my rage in a healthy way. If my emotions start to get too bottled up my anxiety can worsen severely. I am going to attempt to write more here and see if it functions as a good outlet.

I have also started releasing my anger in other ways. The other day when I learned of the Nashville shooting I sent a letter to my district representative and felt a lot of catharsis telling someone in power where they can stick it if I don’t see improvements. That’s something I could never do at my former church. I don’t have a lot of respect for Republicans but he was the only one who bothered to write me back even if it was kind of a stock response.

I have also started leaving comments whenever someone in my family posts misinformation or says something stupid on facebook and I think that it is not only hilarious but necessary. I have spent my life afraid to rock the boat for the sake of others even though my personal beliefs are very intense. Men don’t stop being sexist if women don’t tell them to shut up. Transphobes can speak as loud as they want if the people with common decency don’t speak louder. Racists can take over twitter if there aren’t enough catgirls to drown them out. Churches don’t stop using their idea of God to hurt people if certain former members don’t say something.

I am still weighing how I want to speak out. Something tells me a tumblr blog with four followers won’t get a lot of traction (but really though? four people saw my post? that is so cool!). My therapist has given me the contact information of a woman who was in an actual church cult and she wrote a whole book about that. I have been afraid to reach out because it will bring my feelings of hurt and betrayal to the surface again and I hate feeling the pain of loosing a dozen grandmothers, many siblings, uncles, aunts, cousins, all of the people who said we were a family in Christ. I hate the feeling of having to reevaluate my entire belief system and parse out what is actually good and right versus what is church garbage that only the weird Protestant sects believe. There’s no starting fresh when you still love God and grew up steeped in the Bible like a sachet of black tea left by mistake. Oversteeped, bitter, and cold. Perhaps it is time to brew a new cup of tea.

Pt 2, Uncertainty

In order to try new things I began studying tarot and Christian mysticism. My old church would tell me the reason that tarot cards feel right and good in my hands is just the Devil trying to tempt me. I wonder what they would say if I said I don’t believe in the Devil the way they do. 

I am enjoying my studies in mysticism and spiritualism because the way of experiencing the divine is so completely different from what I know. In many evangelical protestant churches an extensive knowledge of the Bible is encouraged because it is supposed to provide the answers we need to live, and the answers we need to give to other people about how they should live. Mysticism seems to be the exact opposite. Mysticism seems to venerate the divine unknown. There is a belief that if we were to experience God fully in this life, if we were to completely know what the divine wanted and what the divine truly was, that we would begin a sort of un-life because we are separated from the absolute glory of what we now know to be true. I think there is a lot of comfort in this belief even though it still scares me. Evangelical protestants have a very rigid belief system, prefer simple answers, and believe that the end of days will solve all of our problems so it better come quick. Try growing up and having a zest for life with that message blaring from the speakers. 

Not knowing is something I am still getting used to. In my former life I “knew” tarot was “bad” and I “knew” that witches were “evil” and I “knew” that Catholics were “idol-worshippers and not real Christians.” Now I don’t know anything besides my anger, grief, and fearful curiosity. I don’t think people often think of me as someone who is a afraid of things because I am generally loud and friendly, but I am afraid of many things. Death, upsetting my family, heights, new people, teenagers walking in a group, war, water, finding water chestnuts in my Chinese food, ghosts. Most of all I fear uncertainty, which is why my faith used to be a balm.

My new faith scares me because I have no rulebooks or teachers. I have to hide my tarot decks from my mother and I have to question if a practice I learn about is cultural appropriation. I have to be patient and take my time. I watch youtube videos about other witches and I read so many books. I pray and sometimes it feels better than it used to but I still don’t know what its supposed to feel like. I get angry when I see members of my former church in public and I have to question how to deal with my rage when I have no outlet and I don’t want to be baneful. I hope to find others like me, others who are trying new things, others who want to experience both the world and the divine and find beauty in both. I hope there are others who are angry, and I hope they can help me figure out what to do with my rage. Most of all, I hope that I can one day find peace in my heart again.

If anyone has any good advice for me about anything from tarot to anger management, please write me a comment or DM me :)

And if you want to tell me that I am a sinful whore who dances naked in the moonlight with the Devil, then sure, I am, what are you going to do about it? Pray? Good luck.

[sunshinemoonrx]

Space RPG: Characters

Following on my previous post here--

Here's a post on the four main characters for this game and associated stories, some OCs that have been bouncing around in my head for a while. I'll start with the two mentioned in the previous post, who are going to be the party members for this first iteration, and then talk about the two who are going to be side characters/antagonists for this, but in theory graduate to party members in future instalments.

You can see the piece I've commissioned from an actual professional artist in the last post, so this one is just gonna be my quick little design sketches (alongside some images of their visual inspirations), and I'm not an artist, so y'know, these are just the images I supply to artists for reference, some of them doodled at work in whatever notebook I had to hand.

Lyra

An exciteable and overconfident space archaeologist who nevertheless exaggerates those aspects of herself to hide how observant she can be. Usually drives the plot as she flies around the universe to study one mysterious site or artefact after another. Mechanically, she's the primary character; you only game over if she goes down, but she can't take damage if she has another character to block for her, and she's the only one with access to the items menu, using those and her abilities to buff, back up and direct around our next character--

2. Vega

Lyra's bodyguard, rough and gruff and definitely doesn't care about you and has never felt an emotion in her life, shut up. She was originally hired as a mechanic, and Lyra quickly put her to work building a Metal Hero style power-suit she'd designed, that Vega now wears to fight (I still need to design this fucking thing). Also yeah there's a couple of those images up there where she's a catgirl, that's just an occasional side effect of her space HRT, try not to mention it, it really ruins her stoic image.

3. Cass (Cassiopeia)

As you can see, I got the basic design down instantly and then spent a million years fussing over what shape her hair and head should be. Anyway, the concept for Cass started as "I'm gay and I want a bunnygirl in my space game", but I started relating really hard to the clumsy, inept goofball who alternates between happy-go-lucky and "my job is so boring, uuugh" that emerged. She's a deliberately cartoony character, so things like her frighteningly-inhuman strength and the way her bunny-ears headband emotes with her will never be explained.

Cass is a minor crew-member helping pilot the great royal flagship Andromeda, though she's honestly pretty unclear on who the person in charge is and doesn't much care. Someone who definitely can't say the same is--

4. (Sir) Helen

Helen, by contrast, is one of the most important people on the Andromeda, a knight tasked with protecting the princess who owns the ship. I still have yet to really figure out the princess--other than she has a pretty specific personal grudge that leads to her following the two protagonists around the universe annoying and competing with them, dragging these other characters into the plot--but Helen is fervently devoted to her, willing to go to any lengths for her safety and happiness. For now she doesn't act on her feelings, preferring the ideal of chivalric courtly love, but that results in her being pretty pent-up.

(Also, I might change her name at some point, it's not quite set.)

As mentioned, these latter two will become party members at some point, but for the first game Cass will be more of a side character, and Helen an occasionally-recurring boss. So I think I'll save talking about their planned mechanics for when I get into the game systems they interact with. (And yeah, I do have characters that are other things in mind, but it is a very girl-heavy cast because uhhhhh that's what I wanna write.)

I have started to make a build of the game, so here's the placeholder sprites I'm using for them for the moment, for completeness' sake-

In most cases these are reinterpretations of the designs according to what RPGMMV's generator can do to communicate their basic essence (Vega's hair in particular is nothing like that), with the exception of Helen, whose design I was pretty vague on until I clicked the mask accessory and it all clicked into place.

That's it for this post! I don't know how often I'll do these, but it's good for making me actually make progress. Probably the next one I'll do will be on the physical 'outline' of the game in terms of its size and the maps I've made.

[ettawritesnstudies]

Tell me a little bit about one of the tropes in your wip that you’re having a lot of fun writing!

Hey Katie!

I'm not really actively writing anything rn because I'm focusing on finishing my senior year of uni and hanging out with my friends, so I've been spending a lot of time developing my DnD game instead! I'm having a lot of fun with the idea of foils and mirrors right now. I made a crew of NPCs to mess with my party and so we've got the following dualities:

Gnome who got stuck in hell and looks like a cyborg from all the infernal technology he had to interoperate into his body to survive long enough to escape. VS angel from the 7 heavens who got stuck in the feywild, giving him a nature/wild theme, and realizing he doesn't fit into Mt. Celestia anymore when he gets out Cheerful Talkative competitive fire character VS selectively mute ice character who used to be a competitive brilliant scientist but forgot that old life thanks to ~truama~ Woman who used to be a human bard named KS4R, now in the body of an astrophysicist robot that should have belonged to her sister VS a human bard woman living the life that KS4R lost. Sheltered follower of Heimdall trying to reach Ysgard VS estranged and world-wise follower of Heimdall who can't go back to Ysgard Overly friendly paladin cheerleader that looks like bigfoot VS snooty paladin cheerleader that's a pretty mean girl high elf dogboy vs catgirl Realizing as I type this out how unhinged it sounds but I'm having a lot of fun with it XD

[pastriibunz]

I get a little silly and explain the lore for

THE HATCHETFIELD KAIS!

TKWDLM Kai: You know her, you love her, she’s The Kai Who Didn’t Like Musicals! Well, kind of a lie. Girl really likes musicals. She just doesn’t like this one. Her script/fanfic is finished and can be read here, and she’s the only Hatchetfield Kai whose I story plan on writing out, but who knows! If you folks liked TKWDLM enough, maybe I’ll write the other ones out! Also, a thing to note: Every Hatchetfield (minus the Kais in the Trip series, they got their own thing going on) Kai is a variant of TKWDLM Kai. She’s escaped the infection somehow, and she’s been searching the timelines, trying to find one where the world is okay and she’s safe with Paul and Emma. The search has taken at least 2 years and she hasn’t found one yet, but she’ll search for as long as she has to. They’re worth it.

Forever And Always Kai: Someone get a bell cart, because this girl’s got some major baggage! Inserted into the plot line of Forever And Always, Kai watches her mom and dad (Emma and Paul, obv) get married, which sucks for her because of some past trauma involving marriage- *cough* Hiro Mira *cough* -but then her entire world flips upside down when she learns the Emma she’s learned to love like her own mother isn’t the real Emma. Kai, filled with heartbreak from being lied to, and the disgust of the idea of stealing someones life for themselves (she’s got some issues surrounding her own identity) tries to help the real Emma in whatever way she can. When that inevitably doesn’t work out, and after learning that Paul lied about his identity too, Kai tries to make a break (pun intended, you’ll see why in a minute) for Unington. While trying to escape the apartment she breaks either her entire lower leg or her ankle (depending on the ending), slowing her down. No matter what ending, Kai doesn’t make it to Unington, with Paul and Emma finding her. They take her to the hospital and then back home, where Kai begs for them to kill her too. They, much to Kai’s dismay, assure her they won’t and that they’ll love her like their own, Forever And Always.

Hey, Melissa! Kai: Oh, boy. This one’s a doozy. And it’s pretty silly. Me and my friend (@local-soda-can) turned the weird, kinky and fetishy story of Hey, Melissa! from flat out gross/weird to kinda sweet in a really messed up sort of way? I feel like I should say this now: ‼️IT'S NOT SEXUAL ANYMORE BECAUSE KAIS A MINOR (17) AT THE TIME OF THE STORY‼️ so, now that that’s out of the way, let’s get on with the show!! The entire thing is so long and goofy, that I’m making it its own little summary on @beaniibunzz, where I’ll link here when it’s up! But, essentially, Melissa catgirls Kai and Kai just accepts it because she craves praise, validation, and affection that Melissa provides and Kai’s like “oh shit sure I’ll be a cat yeah why not!!” It was really funny to write. Very silly 5/5 stars!!!

ATDTU Kai: Ah, A Trip Down To Unington! Again, my friend local-soda-can made an 8 part live reaction to this, linked here! To summarize, Set 3 years after TKWDLM (where somehow everyone is uninfected), The Hatchetfield Gang™️ (Consisting of Paul, Emma, Ted, Bill, and Charlotte, with guest appearances from Mr. Davidson, Sam, and Melissa) take, as the title states, a trip down to Kai’s hometown of Unington! During their stay, they learn about Kai and her past, as well as how the town isn’t exactly the nicest people towards her. It’s very silly and it makes me giggle. Go read my friends live reaction for more info!!!

Hallow’s Eve Kai: This one I’ve actually never posted about, nor does it have any actual writing behind it. But, it’s still silly! Essentially, During a Halloween party at CCRP, someone *cough* Ted- *cough* has the bright idea to summon a demon!!!! Yay!!! Emma (who has most definitely tried to summon a demon, you cannot convince me otherwise) walks the gang through the process, and at first nothing happens. Then, Kai (dressed as her dad, Bendy!!!! :D) appears. Now, they’ve gotta give her a deal/task she can fulfill or else she’ll be stuck bonded to the gang for the rest of eternity. Maybe one day I’ll probably post something revolving around this thing.

ATUTH Kai: The newest Kai of the bunch! A Trip Up To Hatchetfield is essentially the reverse of A Trip Down To Unington. It, like ATDTU, is set 3 years after the events of TKWDLM. Instead of the gang going down to Unington, however, it revolves around Kai going up to visit Hatchetfield. Kai was supposed to go on tour around the US in TKWDLM, with her starting city being Hatchetfield. There were some complications with that *cough* apocalypse- *cough*, but that’s water under the bridge now. She heads down to Hatchetfield for what was supposed to be a week, and does the show she was supposed to do! But, when she tries to leave??? THE ENTIRETY OF HATCHETFIELD (minus the gang™️ the gang™️ is cool) SCOOPS HER ASS UP AND IS LIKE “nah ah ahhhh no leaving for you ☝️☝️☝️” and now she’s like everyone’s collective child and she just wants to leave- it’s silly :]

and that’s that! if your wondering about Black Friday Kai or Nerdy Prudes Must Die Kai, they’re not on here bc I haven’t started outlining Black Kai-day and Nerdy Prudes Must Kai is still at the beginning and I wanna give it some room to grow before I summarize it

okai byeee :D

[salsa-and-light]

“if people are writing laws to protect the rights of identities, it should be real identities that people actually have.”

Ideally laws should protect everyone. Most prejudices harm more than just their intended victims.

But in any case, this doesn’t make sense.

People shouldn’t ask to have their rights respected because they don’t exist?

What are you actually trying to say?

Because it sounds like you're endorsing a legal philosophy where discrimination is only invalid if it's a matter of identity.

Which isn't true and doesn't make any sense either.

“If a normie ever hears the word “femboy catgirl” they’re gonna turn right the fuck around and vote in the other direction. “

Maybe, heck- even probably.

But as much as I sympathize with that concern..

I think that we’re past the point where we should be worrying about the opinions of people whose bigotry is only held back by three strings of dental floss.

Think about the practical applications of this idea,

To a bigot, the most chaste kiss is going to be too much. Any deviation, any act of Queerness is going to be too far.

So, pragmatically.. if there's no benefit to restricting ourselves then we might as well do what we want anyways.

And on a social level you can't compromise with people who are fundamentally unwilling to compromise.

But you can force them to adjust their perspective.

If someone is too hot in a room and they refuse to agree to any compromise, then the solution is to make it hotter.

If someone doesn't like a room temperature that's above 68°, maybe you can't make them like that, but if you force them to be in a room that's 80° they'll probably shut up about the rooms that are in the seventies and things that are only a degree or two off probably won't even register by comparison.

So if we are to change our personal habits for the furtherment of Queer liberation then what we should be doing is "turning up the heat", as it were.

Because who is going to give a damn about a woman with a pixie cut when there's a tattooed bald woman next door.

Who's going to freak out about a man with painted nails and a sissy walk when there there's drag queens on the television

Wos going to care about binary trans people when their are nonbinary genderfucks.

Obviously, these contextual comparisons don't solve bigotry and abuse, but if you're not in a safe enough position to be however you want, it's vastly preferable to be a little fruity then it is to be the most radically Queer person that someone has ever seen.

And you can't have that, if the most radical expression of Queerness are cis gender-conforming gay people who dress like Mormons.(No shade to them of course, it's just not pushing any boundaries).

Visibility has its downsides, absolutely, but it's a bit late to do anything about most of those, so we might as well go ham to get the benefits.

"Gays, Lesbians, Bisexuals and Trans People can all be explained in a concise logical matter and can convey a sense of normalcy to the average person."

This entirely irrelevant to me.

Really, the fact that you consider explainability to be a relevant factor is entirely mind-boggling to me.

Because everything I've said already about the effect of context on bigotry, but also because I seem to have a different philosophical axis here.

I do not want to live in a world where people have full human and rights and dignity, so long as they live in a way that everyone can understand.

I want to live in a world where people have full rights and dignity regardless of the understanding of their neighbors.

The freedom to be weird and incomprehensible is what separates us from Salem.

And just for the record, there's still a lot of people who don't even understand gay people and even for those who do there are still plenty of cis gay people who have other things going on that will befuddle "The Straights™".

"There is no way you could say the words “femboy catgirl” without a sit down and a three hour explanation to someone who wasnt terminally online."

A Femboy-catgirl is a boy who enjoys dressing like a girl and like a cat, probably at the same time, for sexual or nonsexual reasons.

Easy-peasy, thirty seconds maximum.

I don't think it should be relevant, but it's also not that hard.

If you need three hours, go off, but the problem is not that it's too complicated, the problem is that people refuse to learn or engage with Queerness.

I can't tell you how many people who still think that drag queens and transwomen are the same thing.

And that's a pretty basic distinction.

You say that it's hard to explain to anyone who's not "terminally online", but these people definitely have internet access.

They aren't just conveniently-mysteriously out of the loop; to live in the English-speaking world today, you have to be constantly and actively avoiding Queer people and Queer topics if you want to remain ignorant about them.

"Making these weirdo identities known to the general public will, unironically make them go “eh, maybe these people dont really need these rights"

Yeah, I'm going to repeat myself and say that we shouldn't be worried about the opinions of people who are one step away from being unapologetic bigots; because their "tolerance" isn't worth anything. It would be easier and more effective to force them to be nice than to try to appease them. I don't think that we should force them to be nice to be clear, but politeness at gunpoint is far more reliable than politeness in exchange for compliance

Saying that our rights are dependent on the good will of our betters is a blatant admission that we do not have rights, because rights essentially exist to stop the people who say that we shouldn't have them.

A mouse living in walls does not have equal right rights to the tenants, it simply hasn't been intrusive enough to inspire lethal force.

That is a clear and obvious difference.

People who see you as a pest are not going to grant you equality out of the goodness of their hearts, that is something you have to enforce, by hook, by crook or by legally concealed firearm.

Visibility may be a double edge sword, but it's vastly preferable to living in the walls and waiting hoping that the shoe doesn't drop onto you.

Note the assumption that all LGBT people automatically support each other.

Even though many TERFs/“Gender-critical feminists” are lesbians.

Also, many people specifically say that their issue is not with LGBT people, it’s with “degenerates” hiding behind a minority label.

Including some LGBT people who don’t want to get dragged down with the pervs.

Most of the people who talk about “degeneracy” will apply that label to straight, non-trans people too.

[fbfh]

leo x cat hybrid!reader

wc: 2.2k

pairing: mit student!leo x cat hybrid reader (no pronouns I don't think, gatita as a nickname, otherwise gn reader)

genre/au: college au, hybrid au, a whole lot of fluff

warnings: hybrid shelter, leo is stressed, reader is a bit of a tsundere, general hybrid/cat hybrid stuff, reader wears a collar, leo and reader are both touch starved

summary: leo didn't think he was stressed enough to qualify for an emotional support hybrid, but when he takes in a standoffish cat hybrid from a shelter, you're both surprised at how quickly you warm up to him

a/n: been thinking about leo x catgirl gf a whole lot recently, there will probably be more parts in this series <3 also not proofread lol

tag list: @avashaye @perseajohnson @afidiofobia @thatmultifandomloser @yelenabel0vaswife @almostjollypizza @Fictionalcomforts @lizziebitch33 @jacksondeeznuts @justbookworm@shellosisbae @anything-forourmoony @perseajohnson @i-dont-remember-a-lot @thatmultifandomloser @chasingpj @1dpjohoohp @yelenabel0vaswife @mystic-writings @babiesimagines @Fictionalcomforts @lizziebitch33 @jacksondeeznuts @dreamerball @dustyinkpages

Life is hard, college is stressful, work is tiring

Throw in the fact that he’s double majoring at MIT and won’t be able to see his friends or his mom until at least thanksgiving

Possibly christmas

It’s easy to see why Leo has been stressed

The guidance counselor saw this, and informed him of the hybrid shelter not too far from campus

And that he would qualify for an emotional support hybrid, maybe he should stop by this weekend

It was a nice offer, but he’s doing just fine, really

Then at his next shift at the garage, some Karen’s minivan just needed a tune up but insisted there was something wrong wrong with it

She demanded to speak to his manager, insisted he be fired, and threatened to sue when they kicked her out

It took everything in him not to lose his shit

He’s so tired

He’s barely slept all week

The guy he was paired up with for a project refused to do anything besides criticize him while he did all the work

This is really, really the last thing he needs right now

His boss apologized to him, and told him if he wanted he could head out early

He could tell Leo’s had a rough week

Leo thanked him and left

He somehow found himself at the hybrid shelter

They asked him what he was looking for, gave him a tour

They showed him a ton of cute sweet hybrids

Super affectionate, great for companionship

Then he saw you

You were separated from the other cat hybrids

You were in somewhat rough shape, apparently refusing to cooperate with the staff

You had a rough history, but refused to give any details

You “don’t play well with others”

That’s what they told him

And just knows

He points to you and is like “I want that one”

They’re like “sir they’re not really adoptable, they’re really mean-”

“I. Want. That. One.”

You’re really not sure why someone would want to adopt you, but you soon find yourself in the back of his car on the way to his dorm

And your new home, you suppose

He tries to get to know you a little, get you settled in

Your prickly facade doesn’t slip once

He doesn’t realize you’re listening closely to what he says

“And you’re ignoring me, so I’m sure we’ll get along just fine”

He doesn’t expect anything to change for a while

He gets you some comfier clothes, tries to make you feel at home

He wonders if you like it here, if adopting a hybrid was even a good idea

Then one day he comes home from a really long day of class

He sees you curled up in a ball, cuddling his pillow while a home renovation show plays in the background

His heart gets so warm and god he knows this was a good idea

He’s determined to give you a good home, make you feel comfortable

No matter how much patience and consistency it takes

He’s surprised when you seemingly start warming up to him after a little more than a week

Before he’d only see you when you were asleep or eating

By now it seems to be a habit of yours to be a few feet away from him at all times

A while later, right after he falls asleep, he feels the weight of his bed shift

He blinks, turning his head as he feels a weight across his back

You grab at his shirt, pulling at it with your sharp nails, then letting it fall back down

Once you get comfortable, you lay on top of him, settling down to sleep

“... are you good?” he asks

You hum yes in response, and he reaches over to gently scratch behind your ears before you both go to sleep

He’s pleasantly surprised again when you lean into his hand, responsive to his touch

A deep, soft rumble emanates from your throat and chest, sending vibrations down his back

Are you purring???

He thinks you’re purring

He’s so surprised by this

He really didn’t think you’d warm up to him so fast

But here you are

He sleeps so well that night he almost misses his alarm

When he does get up, he tries to scooch out from under you as carefully as he can

You let out an inquisitive trill, watching him sleepily

“I have to go soon, I have class this morning”

He watches you blink

“You can go back to sleep. I’ll be home later.”

He’s about to go get dressed when you grab his hand, rubbing your face against it

“Have a good day,” you mutter, barely awake

Warmth floods his chest as you rub against his hand a few more times

He pulls a blanket over you and you’re out like a light

Strangely revitalized from the affection and a great night’s sleep, he’s ready to tackle whatever his professors are planning on throwing at him

He expects you to be asleep when he gets back

You usually are

So when he hears you running to the door at the sound of it opening

When you let out an excited trill, tail raising, happy to see him

It catches him by surprise

“Hi!” you say, wrapping your arms around his middle, placing his hand on the top of your head

“I missed you”

You rub your face against him, beginning to purr

You’re not sure why exactly you had warmed up to him so fast

Maybe it’s because he gave you space, let you come to him

Maybe it’s because he didn’t really have any expectations going into this

But when you waited and waited, finally realizing his warmth, his respect and kindness weren’t a front

He’s actually really nice

You couldn’t help yourself

After pushing people away for so long, you’re really touch starved

He is too

So you’re both very happy when your clingy nature is revealed

Soon you’re doing everything together

He teaches you how to cook

You check things off the list when you go grocery shopping

He loves taking you shopping to get cute lil outfits

The way you run around the store and rush back over to him when you find something cute to show him and see what he thinks

Both of yalls favorite part is when you do a fashion show when you get home

You’re so fucking adorable he can’t get enough of you

And you absolutely love the attention

He’s pretty protective over you in public

Especially before you start wearing a collar

For all the normal reasons, but he also knows how some people can get about hybrids

Especially adorable catgirls like you

Knows how to get you away from creeps and weirdos so fucking fast

Eventually you ask him if you can get a collar next time you go shopping

He’s like yeah totally

“I would have gotten you one sooner but I didn’t want you to feel pressured into anything”

He read in some hybrid rescue articles it can be a good idea to let your hybrid approach you bout collars when they’re ready to

You don’t really know what to say

You just purr and nuzzle into him, affectionately biting his neck

He takes that as a hell yeah

Which it is

Soon you’re picking out cute collars at a hybrid store

You’re looking around, both trying not to get distracted

(only somewhat successfully)

Eventually you pick out the cutest collar in your favorite color

You may or may not have gotten some other toys and accessories

He can’t help it, he loves spoiling you

After he gets his contact information put on the tag, you guys head home

“Can… can you put it on for me?”

You ask

Oh god

Oh fuck you’re so fucking cute

“Yeah, sure”

Hair moved out of the way, he attaches the collar with a soft click

You turn around to show him, bell jingling as you move

You both smile at the noise

“What do you think?” you ask, doing a little twirl

He feels like his heart is going to explode

“You look adorable”

You let out a content purr, tail flicking and wrapping around him affectionately

You haven’t even been in each other’s lives for too long

But it feels like you’ve been together forever

You already don’t know what you’d do without each other

Now every day when he comes back from classes

And he hears the pitter patter of you running to the door with your little jingle bell ringing along

He gets so excited to see you

No matter how tired he is he always has enough energy for cuddles

You’re like a human antidepressant

Everything is just so much easier with you around

You sit on his lap while he does his homework a lot

Sometimes you fall asleep

It makes him that much more motivated to finish, that way you can both go to bed

His stress levels have plummeted just from cuddling you and regularly petting your soft ears

It’s basically routine for you to make biscuits on his back or stomach before bed

It tickled a lot at first

But now he can’t really sleep without it

You’ve also gotten rid of several knots in his back and shoulders

So hey that’s a bonus

When he has a longer shift at the garage

Or any other time he’ll be home late

You do get very pouty

“Are you sure I can’t come with you?” you ask, ramping up your persuasive cuteness as much as you possibly can

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure” he scratches behind your ears, and you begin to purr loudly

He squishes your cheeks, pressing a kiss to your forehead before he leaves

You lean into his touch, grabbing his hand in an attempt to keep him here a little longer

He chuckles again

“I’ll be home soon gatita, I promise”

One more forehead smooch and he’s out the door

Sometimes on days like that he’ll find catnip balls or toy mice in his bag

Just so he doesn’t miss you too bad <3

And fuck it’s the cutest thing ever

Once after a particularly long day

When you tackled him as soon as he got home

After you told him how much you missed him

After he told you how much he missed you

And you’re both very glad he’s back

You proudly inform him you made biscuits

“Oh, did you?” he asks setting down his bag

He thinks you mean making biscuits as in kneading blankets or something to get comfy

You drag him to the kitchen and proudly show him the pillsbury out of the can buttermilk biscuits you had pulled out of the oven just before he got home

He’s even more impressed

You tell each other about your day while eating delicious biscuits and cuddling

And god he’s never slept so well since you came into his life

Everyone around him has noticed a difference

He’s way less stressed, more himself

He seems so much happier too

He told his friends about you and they think you sound adorable

Which you are, he informs them

Sometimes when they’re having bad days they’ll ask him for gatita pics

Of which he has plenty

And oh my GOD his mom LOVES you

Esperanza has only met you through video chat so far, but every time Leo calls his mom, you always say hi

If you hear him on the phone you’ll wake up from a sound sleep to say hello

Then immediately pass out again

He’s honestly really relieved, you’re usually pretty shy about meeting new people

But you love his mom

And him

After a while of living together he decides to drop by the guidance counselor's office

He pokes his head in, reminding her of the hybrid shelter she had recommended to him

Tells her about how you came into each other’s lives

He ducks out of the room for a minute, then reenters

“You can say hi if you want,”

You’re clinging to his arm, half hidden behind him

Then more quietly to you

“She’s really nice”

You look up at him, then over at the guidance counselor

You wave once

“Hi” barely audible

You scurry back out of the room

You hear him inform her that you’re a little shy around new people

She’s elated that things are working out well for both of you

She’s a big advocate for hybrid adoption and hybrid rights, so let her know if you need anything at all

Leo thanks her and heads out, handing you a squeaky mouse from a basket of toys she has for campus hybrids

“So, what do you think of her?” Leo asks

You squeak the mouse

“... she’s okay”

That night when you’re both curled up in bed

You’re snuggled up next to him wearing one of his shirts

Your tail wrapped around his waist

He fights off sleep to watch you for a little longer

He gently strokes your ears, his touch so familiar it doesn’t wake you up

He makes a mental note to write a really nice thank you letter to the guidance counselor

And to the hybrid shelter

It feels like you’ve been together for so long

He doesn’t know how he survived without you

You’re both really, really glad you found each other