#I should probably write something to right this wrong
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But he didn’t recognise Elita-1 when he met her....? “Who is that bot, are they crazy?” or something similar is what he says about her when they meet on the train. I don’t have the movie itself or a script to hand so I'm going off of my memory, but I’m pretty sure he doesn’t say anything to suggest they’ve met before.
This is what he says (again, according to my memory, so apologies for any mistakes) about the new shift manager: "We have limited access to the waste management area but the new shift manager there does NOT like distractions. No... No, they prefer we stay here, on the task at hand."
If he had left his work area recently enough to have "met" Elita (even from afar/without speaking to her), he surely should have recognised her on the train, right...? Elita also does not recognise B-127. I'm positive she would have remembered him if they had met and spoken before that point, considering how overly talkative he is - and the way she dismisses him when he introduces himself. If she'd been through that with him before, she wouldn't have been shy about letting him (and the audience!) know, I'm sure.
Whether the new shift manager is actually Elita-1 or not is unknown because she's reassigned to "waste management" (i.e. managing waste). It doesn't necessarily mean she is a manager there, and we also see her alongside other workers loading crates. Is that manager behaviour...? Besides, it makes sense any shift manager in that place would "not like distractions" because one slip-up could bring the Quintessons down on them. The workers there are unknowingly loading those trains with energon (not toxic waste). Even if the shift manager isn't privy to that information, they're probably under pressure from somewhere above to run a tight ship because it would be disastrous if the wrong crates were loaded onto those trains.
As for B-127, I think it's more likely he has overheard somebody else outside of his work area refer to a new shift manager (and the fact they don't like distractions/prefer bots to stay on the task at hand). That could have been as recently as Elita's demotion, or days or weeks ago. For all we know, the shift management position could have a high turnover rate on account of what is actually going on down there. The less bots who know about the energon/toxic waste switch-up, the better for Sentinel, surely.
Anyway, we know Bee didn't speak to anybody because he is pretty clear about his situation: "I just haven't had a lot of company since they put me down here in sublevel 50...", and he states, "sometime between a long time and forever" when Orion asks him how long he has been down there.
My guess is the most company he gets is leaving his designated work station (taking advantage of the "limited access" he has to the waste management area beyond his post), hoping he'll be able to speak to somebody else, only to be immediately redirected.
His emphasis on the "does NOT like distractions" is what is most interesting to me though. Because best case scenario, he's heard those exact words from a couple of bots he's eavesdropped on (desperate for company, but not actually able to participate in the conversation...) and is just regurgitating them verbatim for D-16 and Orion to make it sound like he's clued-in and knowledgeable, or worst case scenario he's had a bad experience at the hands of the "new" shift manager (one who predates Elita's arrival, whether as a worker or a replacement manager depending on what you believe), so he knows through personal experience just how much they do not like distractions, and this is his subtle, light-hearted way of communicating that...
Or it could just be a writing inconsistency, I guess! Maybe a scene got cut, and Bee had met Elita-1 down in the waste management area in a prior draft but they removed the necessary scene and kept that line about the "new shift manager" in anyway.
Otherwise, “new shift manager” is maybe just meant to tell us bots down there don’t last very long and the last one had to be replaced for some reason... Knowing more than they should, perhaps...?
Transformers One (mostly Bumblebee) things I can't stop thinking about.
During the film's opening when Orion Pax falls into a room and onto a table full of energon, he bundles a load of it into his arms and is eating as much as he can until he drops it all and has to keep fleeing.
He's starving. The miners are being underfed as well as overworked.
Additionally, we see Bumblebee has three rations on his person when he offers one up to wake Alpha Trion. This might suggest he's keeping these rations for when he'll need them rather than being able to comfortably feed himself. For the miners it's a scarce resource they have to be careful with, and yet the transformers on the higher levels are enjoying it in abundance.
Bumblebee urging D-16 to "stay down" during Sentinel's attack.
This is an interesting line - if it was a nothing line meant to reflect compassion/empathy, he could have urged Sentinel to stop, or implored the 'bots next to him to take notice and do something. There were other ways to demonstrate "Bumblebee is kind and doesn't want his friend to get hurt."
But he doesn't look to authority or anyone else around him for help on D-16's behalf.
He instead instructs D-16 on how to behave to get the abuse to stop.
Which suggests to me this is learned behaviour, and he's giving advice based on previous experience. He's learned that taking the punishment and letting it happen gets the perpetrator to eventually stop, but resisting and fighting against them keeps it going.
That he was reassigned continually right down into sub-level 50 would tell me he's had more than his fair share of annoying a bigger 'bot enough to get himself knocked around once or twice. And very likely, nobody witnessing the abuse helped him, and/or the authority in the room was the one perpetrating the abuse anyway, so of course they weren't going to step in and help.
The only way out for him has always been to just take it :( So he assumes this will be the quickest/least painful way out for D-16, too.
Bumblebee is as much of a nerd as Orion is.
He knows about the High Guard (and is very excited to recite what he knows about them), he recognises the Primes as soon as they come across them in the cave, he watches the broadcast Orion locates inside Steve's head with interest... It's very subtly done, but I think this is the main shared trait between Orion and Bee. I wish we had seen more of Bumblebee trying to talk to Orion about this shared interest, but I get the main relationship they wanted to portray was that between Orion and D-16 (and really enjoyed that regardless!)
Bumblebee knows how to leave sub-level 50, yet he still goes back to his post, and doesn't appear to be using this escape-time to socialise with anyone else on the other floors he can access since he is so very clearly starved of social contact.
I'm not crying, okay, I'm just imagining this poor little guy sitting out of view watching the other cogless 'bots come and go, knowing he could get into more trouble and be even more isolated if he announces his presence and gets himself caught.
Also his "limited access" to the waste management area, and that thing he says about the main one in charge there preferring that he stays on task and really not liking any distractions... Ugh.
Bumblebee is purposely isolated in that room and there's apparently enough of a deterrent to keep him in it that he is forced to make imaginary friends out of trash to talk to instead.
I'm gonna go insane with grief and rage.
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Hello!✨ I'm kind of back to writing, truth is I've been wanting to write some things these past weeks however it's been impossible for me to be able to come up with something, I'm having serious writers block😭it's a bit frustrating because I love writing😭😭😭 but I'll try my best to end all the requests and hopefully fully come back!🫶🏻
This is a kind of small reaction with Barça Boys (Pedri, Gavi, Fermín and Ferran) , let me know what you guys think!✨
Slam Car Door
Pedri:
He jumped in his seat, his eyes wide as he saw you slam the door of his car
"Madre mía" (Dear god) He whispered, you opened the door to his car
"I'm so sorry" You say with your hand covering your mouth "I didn't meant to, I couldn't grab the door properly and the wind knocked it out of my hands"
"No te preocupes, amor. Ten cuidado, ¿Sí?" (Don't worry, love. Be careful, yeah?) You nod smiling
"¿Compro un kilo o dos de plátano?" (Should I buy one or two kilos of bananas?) You ask
"Dos. Uno pa' ti y el otro pa'mi" (Two. One for you and the other for me) You laugh nodding
"Got it" You went to close the door and Pedri once again jumped when you slammed the door. His mouth opened and one of his hands moved in question
"Amor" You could read his lips from the window
"It's the wind! It's the wind!" You hurriedly say opening the door once again
"Be careful, bonita. The door can break and-"
"I know, I know. I'm sorry, I'll be careful" You say blowing him a kiss, closing the door.
"Y/N!" He yells when he sees you slamming the door "¡Preciosa!"
"What?" You ask giggling
"Stop doing that!"
"What am I doing?!"
"When we get home I swear I'll slam the door of our bathroom!"
"Don't you dare, Pedro González!"
Gavi:
"Any other thing you want me to buy?" You ask lifting your head up from the notes on your phone to look at your two years boyfriend
"I think that would be it"
"You sure? I don't want to forget anything"
"You can add the things we might need to do burguers"
"You want to eat burguers?" He nods smiling softly, you smile before writing down the items you'll need for the dinner "And that's it?" You look down at his hand in your thigh and played with his fingers.
"Yes I think that would be it, unless you'd like to add something at last minute"
"Probably I will" He laughs "I'll be going then" You undo the seatbelt "Hopefully in fifteen minutes, I'm back" You lean over to kiss his cheek.
"Take your time, preciosa"
He grabs his bottle of water from the cupholder and drinks from it. Only to get choked up by it when he hears the slam, his pouty face turns into his famous frown, eyes full of confusion.
"Are your parents coming tomorrow, right? Or is it next week? I'll be cooking your mom's favorite, so should I buy the ingredients now or wait until we're on a closer date?"
"They're coming next week" He confirms what you already know
"So, should I buy them later?" He nods
"Yes, tomatoes can get bad really quick so it's better that way" He nods his eyebrows furrowed. He looked so cute, you wanted to laugh.
"Perfecto, gracias" (Perfect, thanks) You close the door once again, before almost leaving you saw his eyes wide open, trying to figure out how to call you out on this. "Also, do you want me to buy the big jar of nuts?" You ask "or maybe the medium"
"Any of them it's fine" He nods "Something's wrong?"
"No, why?"
"It seems like you're mad"
"I'm not, baby. Why do you say that?" He gets quiet for a minute before shaking his head "Nothing" He whispers "Try not close the door so hard, bebé"
You look at the door before letting a small -oh- acting as if you didn't knew what was bothering him "Did I close it too hard?" He nods instantly
"Joder, si" (Fuck yeah)
"Ay, lo siento" (Sush, I'm sorry) You nod "I'll be careful" You say blowing him a kiss, he winks back at you, you smile and stopped for a few seconds before slamming the door shut.
You could only see his eyes wide open and the "Me cago en la-" he let out before you ran away while laughing, soon you heard the sound of the honk of your boyfriend's car and his yell of your name. You made sure to buy his favorite chocolate cake that day.
Fermín:
"Want me to go with you, amor?"
"Don't worry, Fer. You can stay here, I'll be back in a few minutes" You lean over to kiss his cheek twice before he moved his head and crashed his lips into yours
"Be careful" He said before giving you another kiss, you giggle
"I'll re-stock my girly things and be back in a few minutes"
"I know but still" You smile
"Te quiero mucho más" You say "Want me to bring something for you?"
"I'm so in love with you, you're too cute"
"Te quiero"
"A muffin would do"
"Got it" You got out of the car and without looking back you slammed the door, you started walking but the honk of your boyfriend's car interrupted you "What's up?"
"I think the door wasn't closed"
"Oh! Let me do it again" You slammed the door once again, a bit stronger than before "Better?" You asked and he shook his head
"Not yet" You opened it and closed it again "More" You did it once again putting all of your strenght, you winced a bit in this last one
"Now?"
"Nope"
"Fermín!"
"You were the one starting it, mi amor!"
Ferran:
"¡Ostras!" (Fuck!) "Cuidado, un poco mas y se te devuelve la puerta, preciosa" (Careful, a little more and the door will be returned to you, precious)
"I'm so sorry, Fer! I didn't meant to!"
"That you pay for my door insurance, nena"
"Ferran, stop. It wasn't that bad!"
"Que no fue tan mal? Casi me tiras la puerta en la cara!" (It wasn't that bad? You almost threw the door in my face)
"Exagerado" (Exaggerated)
"Not exaggerated, I'm just taking precautions" You roll your eyes
"Whatever helps you sleep at night, Torres. I'll go" He nods
"I'll be waiting for you, beautiful" You smile and close the door once again. You looked at Ferran who simply looked at you, you tried your best to hold your laughter
"What?"
"I know what you're doing and you won't get any reaction from me!"
"What do you think I'm doing?!"
"You dislike this car and want me to buy another one, right?"
"That's not-"
"Save it. I'll do it"
"No! If you want a new car you don't have to say I influenced you"
"But you did" He said "My mind's already setting everything up"
"But I didn't! All I was doing was slamming your car door to see your reac-" You cut yourself off and Ferran's eyebrows went up lightly. You fell in his trap.
"¿Estabas tirando la puerta de mi coche?" (Were you slamming my cars door?)
"In my defense... I was trying to see your reaction and I didn't do it that hard!"
"No, ¡Un poco más y la puerta llega a mi cara!" (No, a bit more and the door gets to my face!)
"¡Mentira!" (Liar!)
"Venga, vamos" (C'mon, let's go) "I'll go with you"
°°° °°° °°° °°°
Taglist: @gaviymarcsbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld @http-isabela
#gadriezmannsgirl writes!#pedri#pablo gavi#gavi#ferran torres#fermin lopez#pedri x reader#pedri gonzalez x reader#pablo gavi x reader#gavi x reader#ferran torres x reader#fermin lopez x reader#pedri imagine#pedri gonzalez#pablo gavi imagine#ferran torres imagines#fermin lopez imagine#football players x reader#football fanfic#football players imagine
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Joining the Flock
Trying something different, please enjoy
With @henrypreppy
JD flipped the meeting invitation back and forth between his hands, the thin paper material an illusion to the actual weight its writing held. He could not believe he had actually agreed to this, let alone thinking about following through with it. It was not like his parents would have ever known. JD could lie about the entire ordeal and get away with it. But now he was officially registered for the first meeting of the year, his name practically carved into stone.
“Hey there, sorry I don’t mean to interrupt.”
JD rotated his head to the door, eyeing down the black-haired freshman standing patiently at the door. Slim, lanky, and could use tweezers, but by his posture JD could already discern that he was a casual fellow.
“I’m assuming you're Michael Freedman?”
“Mike will do,” Mike grinned. “It’s nice to finally meet you, I’m assuming you’re my roommate?”
JD stood up and extended his hand. “You got it, I'm JD.”
The physical exchange allowed for their first day jitters to transmit like a frequency between them.
“JD huh, is that a nickname?”
JD did his best to hold back his embarrassment. “It’s short for Jeremiah Delgado.”
Mike’s eyebrows rose, “A little bit of a mouthful.”
“You should hear it with the middle names,” JD quipped. “It’s what you get when you combine a Hispanic father and Biblically-obsessed mother.”
“Then no wonder you stick to JD,” Mike replied.
Taking a seat back on his bed, JD decided to steer the conversation elsewhere. “When did you move in? I didn’t see you this morning when I’d hauled everything up those four flights of stairs.”
Mike chuckled, “Perks of the top floor right? I assume I moved in right after you left. You’re not a clean freak or anything, are you?”
“God no,” JD answered, the tone shift catching him off guard. “I don’t have time to care about stuff like that.” JD had already picked up on Mike’s disorganization when he had arrived back at the dorm. It was a bit of a shock to see the place had already become a lived-in pigsty, even though they had just moved in. But JD truly did not mind the clutter, he was a bit on the uncleanly side too. Speaking of which, he realized he had forgotten to get a haircut before he left. The dullish chestnut mop was reaching shoulder-length now; JD was a bit curious to see what would happen if he let it grow even longer.
“Sorry if that was a bit blunt,” Mike plopped onto his own bed. “I just saw the invitation and I was curious.”
“The…?” JD paused, before picking up on what Mike was referring to. “Oh this? No sorry, it was pushed onto me at the club fair.”
The event had been just short of organized chaos. Practically a hundred booths had filled the auditorium, each of them advertising different clubs that the freshman could get involved with. Student Council, the Events Commission, even the CIA (which JD learned stood for “Chemists In Action”). He had been casually browsing, the only thing minorly interesting to him being the Pride organization, but somehow had accidentally strolled in front of the wrong stall.
“Looking to join the Campus Ministry?”
The man calling out to JD was rather put-together, probably the only person in the entire event showcasing a three-piece suit. As JD approached cautiously–hoping the man would not grab any more attention then he already had–he was able to inspect the stranger a little further. Late thirties, athletic, a ring on his finger and of average flair. He was not JD’s type, but he could still appreciate that the man held some appealing characteristics.
The man introduced himself as soon as JD drew close enough. “My name’s Peter, I’m the Campus Minister.”
JD replied accordingly, loathing his luck. He had chosen a college as far away from his parents and their strict lifestyle as possible, and yet now here he was, conversing with the very people who abided by their same morals and guidelines.
“Well Jeremiah, are you inclined to learn more about the mission of the Baptist Church?”
Wincing at the use of his full name, JD replied, “I actually grew up Baptist, but I’ve grown away from the faith since.” As soon as the words left his mouth, JD realized his mistake.
“Well you have come to the right place!” Peter exclaimed, a bit too over joyous. “The Campus Ministry is welcome to all, especially those returning to God’s graces.”
Before JD could protest, Peter had already handed him the formal invitation and written his name on the sign-up form. “The meeting is tonight, you won’t miss it!”
“I can’t believe you got sucked into that crap!” Mike was laughing after JD had finished replaying the scene for him. “Are you really planning on going?”
“I mean I have to, right? They’ve got me signed up.”
Mike shrugged, “It’s up to you man, but you don’t have a lot of time to decide.”
JD quickly eyed the invitation and then his phone and realized Mike was right. If he was going to make this meeting, he would have to leave now.
“Crap!”
———
By the time he got to the chapel, he had worked up quite the sweat. JD was not an active person, and as he entered the building, he realized he was also not properly dressed. Everyone else adorned their Sunday bests, some even more formal. The button-ups and slacks were a complete contrast to his own indie band tee and distressed jeans. JD shamefully placed himself in the back pew, hoping no one would notice the black sheep.
“Mind if I sit here, brother?”
JD obliged without acknowledging the stranger, cursing to himself as Peter ascended to the podium at the front of the chapel.
“Brothers and Sisters, I want to welcome you all to our first meeting of the year. As the Campus Minister, it is an honor to be able to guide you in our journey together, and with your trust lead you on the path towards God.”
All the members of the group came together to a round of applause.
“Let me make one thing clear right away, brothers and sisters,” Peter began assuredly. “At the heart of the Campus Ministry is community. God did not create us to live alone in isolation. He specifically designed us to live together as like-minded beings. To thrive in Biblical communities where people who love Jesus Christ can enjoy fellowship with one another. To help each other grow in the faith, to become more alike. To learn from each other, incorporate a need for each other. God uses others to help us grow individually, and God uses us to grow other people.”
“I am reminded of a verse from Matthew 18:20: ‘For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them.’ It is here that Jesus calls us to be sheep, His sheep, flocking under His name in likeness and in aspiration to fulfill His teachings. As a Biblical community, we find ourselves in Jesus. He is our center point, what draws us together, the common bond that we share. And as Baptists, we find ourselves following our shepherd, assimilating as one when we name ourselves a member of His church.”
“So why is community at the heart of the Campus Ministry? Whether you are eighteen-, nineteen-, twenty- or more-years-old, you came here searching for guidance. Guidance to tell you where to go, what to do, who to follow. Guidance found through relationships, through our collective relationship with God and His church. The Campus Ministry offers that guidance and more. Our community of brothers and sisters will help you navigate classes, properly study, and make wise decisions. They will eat with you, spend time with you, bring you into the fold, our flock, no matter what former walk of life. They will help you embody the classic look of a Christian.”
“Now, I would like to invite you to embrace that first step towards community. Take a moment and turn to your neighbor, introduce yourself to your new brother or sister.”
Finding himself slightly absorbed by Peter’s sermon, JD broke out of his haze to finally acknowledge the stranger he had allowed to sit beside him. However, JD found himself rendered speechless by the beautiful man before him. With coppery hair, a diamond-cut jaw, and inviting green eyes, JD gawked a second too long at his traditional counterpart. Pairing pleated trousers with a crimson sweater vest over a simple white button-up, the stranger exuded refinement. From his Ivy League haircut to his natural woodsy smell and even by the way the stranger sat, JD could feel heat rising from his own cheeks.
“Jackson Sanderson,” the stranger offered, and after a uncharacteristic stutter JD replied with his own.
JD was then introduced to other members of the club as they came around to introduce themselves. There was a Colton, a Bryce, a Jared, a Stanley. Eventually the names and faces began to blur together, each of them almost identical to each other. Attractive by traditional standards, reeking of arrogance and privilege. JD found himself almost unable to hide his large erection, loathing his existence. It was times like these he wished not to be “blessed” as his father had once grotesquely put it.
After everyone had returned to their seats, Peter finished his monologue. “Before you realize it, each and every one of you will become bonded through our Campus Ministry. It may not happen right away, but once you begin to know each other, you will begin to shape each other too. Now, let us end in prayer.”
———
JD’s first day of classes flashed by in an instant. Undecided, his schedule was mostly filled with the required objectives. A standard biology course, base level statistics, even a communications class–all of which had no actual assignments for the day besides reading the syllabus. But by the late afternoon after his final seminar, JD found himself ready for a lazy evening. He drafted plans involving picking up fast food, watching an episode or ten of some raunchy sitcom, and then drifting off to bed.
“Jeremiah!”
The minister’s assertive baritone cut through JD’s headphones, which were slowly lowered to passive-aggressively demonstrate his annoyance.
“I wanted to thank you for coming to the first Campus Ministry meeting last night,” Peter explained as he approached. Today, he was dressed in a brown suit with a pattern meant for a man twice his age. “I was hoping to discuss some other things as well. Have a moment?”
Reluctantly, JD obliged, and soon he was following Peter to his office. Once inside, JD was able to discern a bit more about this man who had strangely taken an interest in him. Basic wooden cross on the wall, pile of materials on theology beside the desk, a picture of a woman around the minister’s age holding three children. JD accepted the seat in front of the desk, hoping this would not take long.
“Seeing the instantaneous bond that we have created over the past 24 hours,” JD restrained his eyebrow from visually questioning this statement. “I took it upon myself to become your academic counselor. As your minister, it’s my role to offer you structure and guidance during these impressionable years.”
JD was a bit startled by this statement, but said nothing.
Peter continued, “I’ve already taken a gander at your schedule and noticed all gen-eds. As you are undecided, I was curious if you had any majors you had in mind.”
“Not particularly,” JD answered, finding himself a little more relaxed. “I was hoping I wouldn’t have to think about it until a bit later, honestly.”
Peter’s direct eye contact intensified slightly. “Maybe it would be best to spread out your electives and place you in some courses designed to determine a major. Considering your passion for the faith, you could look into some classes in the Religion Department.”
JD found the minister’s wording a bit odd, almost belittling in a way. His response came out a bit muddled, “I never said that I had a passion for the faith?”
“Well, Jeremiah, I think it could do you a lot of good. As the Campus Minister, I’d be happy to offer you some additional resources as well.”
“‘Resources’?”
“Of course,” Peter’s face broke out into a big grin. “I’ll connect you with one of our students in the department. I have one in mind already, a sophomore: Jackson Sanderson.”
A blush broke out onto JD’s face. He could not perceive if the minister had noticed it or not.
“Jackson is one of our finest men,” Peter resumed. “You will immediately find him as a brother, perhaps one of your closest. After a while, you will feel the desire to emulate him, as he has the classic look of a Christian.”
Again, JD noted the strange diction, and a repeat of a phrase he had heard last night. But JD also noticed that he felt a certain calm when he listened to Peter. His voice just had a quality that kept one at ease. That was probably why he had become a minister.
“I’ll notify Jackson to get in contact with you shortly.” Peter then took a stand, prompting JD to do the same. “Until then, let’s begin thinking about your major and where we’d like to see you next semester. And further along, when you graduate.”
———
Jackson reached out to JD hours later, and after a bit of texting JD found himself roped into a study session the following day. He did not know what to expect, but he decided to put his best foot forward. Sure, he had no desire to engage with the church after his high school graduation, but JD rationalized that he could still be there to make friends.
“Jeremiah!” Jackson called out from one of the pews. He was surrounded by a swarm of men, all wearing outfits appropriate for more conservative times. JD had prepared for this, although his khakis and short-sleeved button-up still did not fit the bill.
“It’s JD,” JD corrected politely. “Thank you for letting me crash your guys’ study group.”
“Of course!” one of the men replied. JD should have known his name, but the person’s features were almost unrecognizable from the next. “Any brother is welcome to join.”
“Especially once Peter told us you were enrolling in the Religion Department,” Jackson added.
“I’m not enrolling in the Religion Department.”
“We get it, you’re ‘just interested’,” a second man insisted, to which everyone else began to chuckle as if he were referring to some inside joke.
“Anyway, don’t worry about it.” Jackson replied. The smooth quality of Jackson’s tenor settled JD’s nerves. “Let’s get to studying, shall we?”
The group agreed and promptly found themselves absorbed in their literature. While JD stuck to his reading and recording notes, the other men held a shallow conversation: one that any person could easily flow in and out of without paying too much attention. It began with simple topics at first; professors, extracurriculars, sports. None of these would typically entice JD, but he found himself occasionally tuning into the group’s monotonous channel. Eventually however, the topics converged into a singular subject: the Bible.
“I just think John’s interpretation is by far superior to the synoptic gospels,” Colton countered. JD could not believe he had remembered his name. “His use of monological writing is what makes Jesus more engaging to the interpreter.”
Jackson shook his head, “That may be true, but the synoptic gospels offer parables, short stories that people can relate too.” Jackson’s presence was different now then when they had first met. Before, frankly, JD had taken eroticism from Jackson’s standardized beauty. But now, he sensed something else. Rather than affection, JD recognized admiration.
“Enlighten us, Jackson, what parables can you relate to,” Bryce teased. “If we looked under your bed, would we find oil? As we already know you are a virgin.”
All of the men, including Jackson and JD, took joy in that remark.
“Perhaps you will, perhaps you won’t,” Jackson finally replied. “But take our group for example, are we not fulfilling a parable right now? I would situate ourselves in the story of the Prodigal Son.” Jackson motioned to his peers, “Are we not the father?” And then to just JD, “And is Jeremiah not the Prodigal Son?”
The group pondered this thought, turning expectantly towards JD for an answer.
“Um…” JD stumbled, not expecting to be put on the spot. “I mean, that’s one way to look at it.”
Once again, the group exploded into laughter, their volume ascending to the roof of the chapel. JD chuckled along too, his nervousness fading as he became more comfortable with the group. By the end of the night, he found himself pleasantly surprised as he accepted the invitation to the next study session.
———
“Hey dude, are you interested in going clubbing?” Mike asked, having just exited the shower.
“When are you thinking of going?” JD was reorganizing his desk. For some reason, its cluttered nature had begun to bother him.
“In a few minutes here, hopefully.” Mike dropped the towel on the floor and grabbed some clothes off his bed. He gave a strong sniff to each item inspected, those too dirty were then tossed onto the floor. JD observed this but said nothing.
“Man, sorry but I can’t. I got a study group tonight.”
“On a Friday night?” Mike questioned. “This is like the fourth Friday in a row.”
“I know, but I already said I was going to be there.”
Mike frowned, scratching at his lower regions a bit. JD swiftly averted his eyes. “But don’t you study with these guys three times a week, and have lunch with them everyday too?”
“Yeah, but they purposely choose Friday nights to not be tempted,” JD finally answered.
The partially-answering statement held in the air for an awkward moment. Eventually, Mike responded. “Right…”
JD turned back to his task at hand, throwing out trash that should have been discarded earlier.
“Well,” Mike grabbed a jacket and his keys. “I guess I’ll see you later then.”
“Uh huh,” JD’s response was dull. Once Mike shut the door, he released the long breath that he had subconsciously been holding. He wondered when Mike’s presence had become so taxing. Perhaps he compared his roommate to the study group’s austere quality. JD found those straight-laced men ironically soothing.
This theory was proven once JD arrived into the chapel, the smiling faces of his peers sending a warm tingle across his body. The study session went similar to the rest, beginning with actual work before simply devolving into lighthearted, yet engaging discussions. If these conversations were not surrounding the Bible, then they focused on a topic JD was even less familiar with.
“I think I’m going to propose to Hannah,” Jared suddenly said, to which everyone in the group audibly gasped.
“Are you ready, brother?” Jackson inquired, to which JD nodded along.
“He’s already got the ring,” Stanley answered. Weeks ago, this development would have shocked JD. Two twenty-year-olds marrying in this day and age? But now, the thought was not that unfathomable to him. He was becoming more accustomed to the men's ideology.
“I booked reservations for her favorite restaurant,” Jared announced, his typical stale manner of speaking almost giddy. Almost. “I’ll pop the question before dessert of course, it’s all arranged.”
To that, the men applauded Jared, shaking his hand vigorously and giving brotherly pats on the back. JD high-fived him, embracing the honest excitement for Jared. Once they cooled down, Colton continued the conversation.
“Now you’ve got me inspired, thinking I should finally pop the question to Mary.”
“You’ve been thinking about doing that since you first met her in private school,” Bryce retorted.
“And have you not pondered the same with Julia, brother?” Jackson smirked, to which the other men piggy-backed off of. “Speaking of women, have you set your sights on any yet, Jeremiah?”
JD blinked, unbothered by the use of his full name, “Uh…not exactly. I just haven’t been looking for anyone I guess.”
JD was telling the truth. Before college, he had planned on finally finding a male partner to love and hold. And to lose his virginity to. But since the first day of classes, JD had not felt a connection to any male in particular on campus–or in general. JD assumed his sex drive had been lowered, that he was just growing out of some awkward teenage phase.
“Perhaps we’ll have to set you up then,” Jared’s grin held an impish edge. “I believe Jessica is still looking for a potential husband.”
Jackson shot Jared a glare, to which all the other men hollered at. “Jessica is only a freshman.”
“And so is Jeremiah,” Stanley pointed out. JD tried his best to stay quiet, although he had to admit that he was having fun too.
“We’ll see if Jeremiah proves to be everything the minister has promised,” Jackson offered. “After all, Jessica will only take a man who has that classic look of a Christian.”
———
“Jeremiah! Thank you for meeting with me again. Please, take a seat.”
JD followed the instruction, placing himself on the other side of the minister’s desk.
“Already halfway through your first semester, isn’t that unbelievable?” Peter started.
“It certainly is,” JD’s response was friendly. “Can’t believe two months have already flown by.”
“I can’t believe it either, but I can see it,” Peter noted. “I’m assuming you’ve been having meals with your other brothers?”
“They’ve got me going to the gym now too,” JD sighed. “An hour every morning before class since last week.”
JD had been dining regularly with his study group, at lunch and dinner and even the occasional breakfast. And since this habit had begun, JD found himself eating like his peers too. No more ramen and late night fast food deliveries. Fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins were now the major facets of his diet, leading to his cleaner skin and an overall healthier glow. It was strange at first to recognize how much of a difference this better diet–and as of recently the exercise–had improved his body. JD found himself a bit more muscular, a bit more jovial, and overall more energized.
“That’s not surprising, our men do like to stay in proper form, physically and spiritually,” Peter chuckled. “Speaking of which, last we talked, you had discussed that you were contemplating committing to a major in the Religion Department. Have you thought more on that topic?”
JD considered this for a moment, not remembering if that was what he had actually said or not. But something about the minister’s confident tone assured him that Peter was correct. That was why he had come to this college after all, as his parents had approved of the strong Baptist connection. At least, to appease their wishes.
“A little bit I guess,” JD replied, causing Peter to grin. JD at first thought of it as smug, but then corrected the thought to Peter simply being excited for him. “I mean I’ve attended all four of the Campus Ministry events so far, and being around the guys has certainly been an influence.”
“A positive influence,” Peter amended.
“Yeah…a positive influence,” JD slowly repeated back, before coming back to speed. “As of right now though, I’m still undecided on it all.” Peter carefully leaned back in his chair, spreading his legs out a bit to accommodate. It was almost like the minister was trying to size him up, assert a bit more control.
“You are apprehensive because you still identify yourself as an outsider to our community.” Peter’s response was measured, continuous yet firm with every word laid out. “One thing that can be addressed is your attire. At the material level, you will follow the direction of your peers.”
JD tried to process this, although his brain felt a little hazy. “That might help, yeah.”
“That is something that can be addressed too, your intonation.” There was a particular glint in Peter’s eye, but JD found it easier to focus on the minister’s voice. “Just like your brothers, your inflection will remain in control and moderated. Your pitch will remain even and your vocabulary will become more refined.”
“Certainly.” While just one word, each syllable had required additional effort to come forth from JD’s mouth. The colorless articulation however obscured this exertion.
“It’s good that you’re taking my advice, Jeremiah,” Peter affirmed. “You have placed your trust in me to lead you on the path towards God.”
JD did not know if this was true before, but after Peter had said it, it felt as such.
“You will want nothing more than to become a part of our community,” Peter finalized. “I’ll inform Jackson of such, and he’ll help you along.”
———
JD stepped out of the bathroom, steam pouring out from behind him. He had never taken such a long and luxurious shower but it had felt so right. Jackson had recommended it, saying it was the best way to get rid of any excess hair that may have stuck to his skin after visiting the barber. He could not see it now, but JD already loved the shortened cut on his head. Once it was dried, the sides would naturally fall into a tight bowl-like shape. Then, JD would have the pleasure of applying the product–prescribed by Jackson–to fluff his bangs up into a traditional, conservative quiff. A proper style for a gentleman like himself.
In nothing but a towel, JD peered cautiously around the room. All alone, he allowed himself to freely disdain his roommate’s messy style. He had remained civil around the topic with Mike, but had secretly grown to loathe it. JD knew better than to say anything however, as that would have been pompous. Carefully placing his feet into open spots on the floor, JD tip-toed his way to his dresser, surprised to find a small note taped to the drawer.
A final gift, the classic look of a Christian -JS
Not thinking twice about the phrase, JD was surprised to find his boxers had been replaced with starchy, high-waisted white briefs. But his confusion quickly dissolved into recognition before fading into a simple, charming smile. The cotton fabric went up and over each of his legs in a matter of moments, the traditional cut making JD feel grounded somehow. Controlled.
Turning to face the mirror, it was almost shocking for JD to see the new reflection of himself. Only weeks away from the end of his first semester and the man before him was much different than the boy who had come to campus. Tanner, more muscular, an image of young masculinity. But those were explainable thanks to his improved diet and exercise. Other factors, like his wider jaw, broader shoulders, and inched-back hairline, were not as identifiable. JD questioned if it was incoming maturity, or perhaps something else.
Before he could reflect on the thought further, his body mechanically moved along to his wardrobe. A rack once filled with tees and crewnecks was now stuffed by dress shirts, vests, and blazers of assorted varieties. Tamer colors and patterns, only distinguishable to the distinguished eye. The rest of JD’s dresser now contained a variety of slacks, along with many different types of dress socks and ties. Loafers, oxfords, brogues among others sat in alphabetical order at the bottom. It was practical, and practically perfect.
When his peers had first offered to makeover his closet, JD had been apprehensive. Something in the back of his mind rang an alarm, whispering that he would also be sacrificing a part of his individuality. But JD’s body had decided for him in that moment, his head nodding in approval and with an amiable grin. And now after the swap, which JD later learned was in part financed by the Campus Ministry, he realized there was nothing he should have been afraid of.
After all, all of the brothers were remarkably different. Colton rocked a business cut with his blond hair, a style no one else had. Bryce had the most suits of the five, almost as many as their minister. Jared was the only one officially engaged (although JD predicted that fact would not last much longer. Stanley had his thick, time-honored black horned rims. And Jackson held his affinity for sweater vests, a Bonafede professional at styling them. They were truly all unique.
Quickly assembling his hair and a tasteful outfit–a white button-up, French navy-hued trousers, a currant colored tie and chocolatey derbies for his feet–JD assembled his school bag and made haste for the chapel. When he arrived, it was only Jackson awaiting him in the pews. The others had gone out to grab a quick meal.
“Jeremiah! I was beginning to think you wouldn’t make it,” Jackson nudged as JD took a seat beside him in the pew.
“You know I would not miss our study sessions for the world, brother!” JD’s rebuttal was chipper and authentic. Since Mike’s first proposal of clubbing, the offer has never been made again. But JD had received other invitations for outings with his fellow peers. However, none of them were ever accepted. To JD, it always felt more appropriate to stick to his group. Their presence felt familiar, grounded. Right.
“‘They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship’,” Jackson started. “‘to the breaking of bread and to prayer.’”
“‘And all the believers were together and had everything in common.’” JD finished.
“The Book of Acts, I’m impressed,” Jackson smirked. “I now understand why Peter was so serious about you.”
JD should have questioned what Jackson was referring to, but instead sunk into the warm glow of his brother’s approval.
“But there’s still one thing you have to do,” Jackson noted.
JD’s heartbeat hastened rapidly, something he had not expected.
“You have got to come to church with us!”
JD felt a glimmer of hesitancy. He had not gone to church since he had come to college. He tried to remember why, but a subtle pain clouded his thoughts. Was it because of his parents? No, they just wanted what was best for him. Then was it because JD did not feel accepted by the church? JD tried to follow that thread, but the deeper he ventured, the stronger the ache in his head became.
“Come on, what have you got to lose?” Jackson gave JD a playful shove. “Plus, the minister will be giving a blessing to all students before finals.”
Something was telling JD to reconsider. Something urged him to do otherwise. But JD could not figure out what was so wrong about attending a simple service.
“Alright, I’ll go.”
Jackson’s perfect smile was wider than JD had ever seen it. “That’s it, brother! Then you’ll be just like us.”
That statement triggered something in JD. As if following out a code downloaded into his vital operating systems, he made a note to schedule an appointment with his academic counselor.
———
“What can I help you with today, Jeremiah?”
Unlike the composed minister sitting before him, JD was irritable, prickly. Words were begging to escape his mouth, although he could not figure out what they were. He tried to express them as best he could.
“I want to become a part of the Campus Ministry, a part of your Biblical community.”
“And why’s that?”
“Because I want to be another sheep in the flock.”
A small smile tugged at one corner of Peter’s lip. “In other words, you are saying…”
The words flew out JD’s mouth: “I want to embody the classic look of a Christian. I want to fit in.”
That heavy, revealing truth tumbled before the two men, its release absolving JD of a burden unaware to him had been accumulating for months. Ever since his first meeting with the minister.
“It’s much easier to be just another piece of the puzzle, Jeremiah,” Peter began. “Never having to worry about anything else when you have a place to belong.”
The minister reached into his desk and pulled open a drawer, removing a small folder with JD’s name on it. Opening it, Peter pulled out a single sheet of paper and placed it in front of him. JD’s eyes scanned the page before focusing back on Peter’s own.
“Your schedule that I have already drafted up for the next semester,” Peter replied, grabbing a pen. “You will join the Religion Department as a Theology major with a minor in Baptist Ministries. After graduation, you will continue your studies to receive a Masters of Divinity. By then, my proselytization will no longer be necessary as you will have become a permanent traditionalist.”
JD knew better than to say anything. Instead, he let his actions speak for him, his hand accepting the pen from Peter and with a delicate cursive, signing his name.
“Welcome to the flock, Jeremiah.”
———
“A healthy Christian learns and grows through community. A healthy Christian experiences spiritual and relational growth when surrounded by an affirming group of like-minded believers. Jesus spent a significant amount of time with his small group, the apostles, molding them and teaching them how to love and support one another and how to function as a healthy small group. Today, we do the same for our brothers and our sisters.”
Jeremiah sat in the front row next to Jackson, Colton, Bryce, Jared, and Stanley. The group was expertly dressed. Jeremiah’s baby blue button-up was paired with a matching tie underneath his charcoal suit. The tie, with cornflower polka dots on top of a banana cream yellow, was particularly chosen for its “vibrant and exciting pattern,” as Jeremiah had thought of it. Along with caramel wing tips that coupled nicely with his soft yet stiff quiff, Jeremiah felt dignified by his outfit.
“It’s great to be part of a healthy, well-functioning group,” the preacher, an older, handsomely well-off man by the name of Dr. Ernest Holloway, continued. “However, our individual wishes can sometimes interfere with the overarching needs of the congregation. For our Christian community to remain intact, we need to come before God with an earnest desire to help others, and therefore maintain the needs of the group to truly experience the richness and glory of His intentions.”
“Being in a group is committing to one another by saying, ‘I want to laugh with you, share with you, study with you, and pray with you’.” Taking a deep breath, the doctor made his closing statement. “Being in a group is saying, 'All I want is to be like you’. Amen.”
“Amen,” Jeremiah and the congregation replied. The rest of the service went by quickly, and before Jeremiah knew it, he had finished singing the final verse of the closing hymn. Soon, the church was bursting with lively energy. Joyful conversations broke out between the Baptist brothers and sisters, nobody in a hurry towards the exit. Jeremiah found himself in a similar manner, following behind his peers as they sauntered their way towards the door.
As Jeremiah followed Jackson outside of the church, a young female voice rang out from behind them. “Well look at these fine, upstanding, proper young men!”
The pair turned around, now outside, to see who had beckoned them. Jeremiah caught the eye of the young lady, her coppery hair and conservative sense of style somehow familiar to him.
“Both of you are so dandy and traditional,” she remarked. “A classic look for a Christian.”
“Jeremiah,” Jackson sighed. “This is my younger sister, Jessica.”
It took Jeremiah a moment to compose himself, a bit of scarlet peppering his cheeks. His hand nervously shot forward. “J…Jeremiah Joshua Manuel Delgado…nice to make your a...acquaintance.”
Jessica accepted his greeting. “I’ve never had quite this effect on one of your friends before,” she smiled to Jackson. “I think he fancies me.”
“Don’t flatter yourself so, Jessica,” Jackson denied. But all three of them knew Jessica was telling the truth. Jeremiah had gone nonverbal, the blood from his brain redirected to another destination. There was a tingling sensation around Jeremiah's genitals, his member slowly inflating. It was times like these that he was thankful to have “not been blessed” as his father once put it. If his package had been larger, there surely would have been an indecent scene.
Jeremiah knew what he had to do. With all the strength he could muster, he drew the only words he could think of to his mouth. His perfect jaw shifted, heavy brow furrowed, and he forced the sole sentence out of his mouth.
“Jessica Sanderson, will you marry me?”
———
“JD…Jeremiah, is that you?”
Jeremiah had finally grabbed the remainder of his items, the last bags of his belongings ready to go. Mike was standing at the door, blocking his path.
“Where are you going?”
Jeremiah scoffed, disapproving of Mike's irregular radicalism. “Somewhere that is cleaner, fresher, prim and proper. Somewhere where I can remain a dignified man dedicated to preserving tradition and culture in this world. If I am to embody the classic look of a Christian, then I ought to do so with like-minded brothers.”
Confused, not only by the fancified words but by his roommate’s overall preppification during their first semester, Mike asked a simple question. “Why?”
With a pleasant smile, Jeremiah handed over a small sheet of paper. He then exited the dorm, leaving Mike to flip the Campus Ministry’s invitation back and forth between his own hands and consider the harm of attending just one meeting.
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Seeing Blind (you’re too good to be all mine)
Chapter 5. Mature, 2.4k. Read under cut or on Ao3
(Part 1) (part 2) (part 3) (part 4)
As always thank you to @divine-misfortune for writing this with me <3
Rain whipped around. Confused to see Dew running up to him from the side field, brushing debris off of his overalls. They had never spoken before, at least not directly like this. Small quips and comments when he finds himself at Swiss’ side that sound like they’re meant to be digs directed at him despite the fact Dew barely acknowledged his presence.
“I’m sorry?”
“I think we should have a talk“
It’s Rain’s turn to barely sleep in Swiss’ arms. His head swimming with a tirade of thought. Was he not good enough? Did he do something wrong? Go too fast? Maybe Swiss just didn’t want him in the same way he did?
He could feel how hard he was against his back for a good portion of the night. Rationally, most of that couldn’t possibly be true. Why would Swiss assume he wasn’t ready for it? None of it made sense and it left a strange, conflicted feeling in him. Not quite dejected but certainly confused.
At least he could finally sleep comfortably beside him, in a bed, like real people who like each other do.
When the sun threatens to crest the horizon, Swiss is shifting behind him. Moving carefully. Thoughtfully trying not to jostle Rain awake, no reason for him to have to adhere to the ungodly early schedule Swiss kept. It’s a hopeless effort but it was the thought that counted. Rain stirred as the arm beneath his head began to retreat, making a soft sound he could only describe as a chirp. His eyes fight to open, drooping despite himself, as Swiss slipped from the cozy little cocoon they’d made.
“Shh tadpole…Go back to sleep”
Cute. Rain looked beyond adorable and Swiss suddenly understood the meaning of ‘cuteness aggression’. The messy hair and blush coloring his cheeks the loveliest shade of pink was entirely unfair, but the way he managed to bat those pretty eyelashes was playing dirty.
“Just’a couple more minutes Swiss, ‘lease” Rain mumbled his way right into a yawn, tugging at Swiss’ shirt like he might just drag him back into bed like this.
“I’ve gotta go, I can’t be late. But come see me on my break, ‘kay?”
Swiss smoothed the hair from his forehead, dipping down to kiss the little crease between his brows before Rain’s head dropped back to the pillow with a small whine that he gives up on committing to when the comforters pulled back over him. Hard not to snuggle back in, harder not to bury his face in the other pillow to inhale the comfortable lingering scent like he might just pretend Swiss was still beside him.
Didn’t stop him from pouting though.
Leaving Rain was a real test of his will but dutifully Swiss dragged himself away. It was safer for him to duck out as early as this, less of a chance of being caught by the wrong person. He woefully stuffed his feet back into his muddy boots abandoned by the front door and trudged outside towards his truck.
He prayed it was too early for anyone else to be lurking about, and if it had to be anyone, let it be Mountain.
But God had a sense of humor, apparently.
Dew and cirrus were waiting for him with wolfish grins near the tractor, immediately trying to prod him for answers.
"Well well well, smooth talked your way right into his bed huh?" Dew laughed
"Didn't take him for easy.” Cirrus folds her arms looking over his sorry, disheveled state.
"So how was he? Did he even know what he was doing? Was it embarrassingly bad? That why you're doing the walk of shame before the suns even up?" Dew gasped at the promise of scandal, hanging off of Cirrus’ arm with a smirk like he was pleased with himself.
Swiss couldn’t tell if he wanted them to die or if he'd like a stampede of cattle to take him out then and there. Honestly, didn't know if they even deserved a response. Probably shouldn’t. All their senseless prodding, he shouldn’t dignify it but God Dew was too fucking annoying to ignore at times.
“We didn’t do anything” Swiss pushed past them to make the hike back to his truck so he could at least change. Boss might give him weird looks for showing up in yesterday's wrinkled clothes.
“Oh, sure. Totally. So, tell me, he invites you in and you spend the night doing what exactly? A kiss on the cheek before turning off the lights at nine on the dot so you can sleep on opposite sides of the bed with both hands above the covers?” Dew questions incredulously, with an oddly specific example. “You’re the worst liar I’ve ever fucking met, Swiss!”
Swiss winced at the volume of his voice, nervously eyeing the farmhouse standing silently as he gestured aggressively for him to shut the fuck up. Rain would be mortified if he knew the others were talking about him in this fashion.
“Love that Swiss thinks he can lie his way out of shit like this, as if you of all people don’t know what he looks like after a long night.” Cirrus snickers behind her hand and Dew suddenly looks appalled.
“Oh my fucking god it was one time!”
“It was a couple times actually-“
Like a thief in the night, Swiss uses their endless bickering as an excuse to slip away from their interrogation. He climbed into the backseat of his truck and rummaged under the passenger seat - working a job like this, he learned early on to keep a change of clothes on hand. It was awkward to say the least. He was not a dainty man and the back of his truck was far from spacious but he managed to climb out only having smashed his elbow into the window twice. Seemingly just in time. The crunch of gravel and the sharp squeaks of a poor suspension announced their arrival before the truck branded with an all too familiar logo rounded the bend.
His head snapped around alarmingly fast, met with mischievous grins from the both of them. He bristled. “Not a fucking word or I’m telling him to drug test you two.” Swiss hissed, both warning and threatening. Dew made a face, opening his mouth to retort but Cirrus was faster. Sticking out her tongue in his direction before grabbing him by the arm and leading him away to where they would pretend to work for the next two hours.
As they left him standing beside his truck, Swiss watched Rain’s father get out of the truck with clearly stiffened limbs. His throat felt tight as he looked his way, fearing that just maybe he knew but the man just regarded him with a curt nod and a gruff good morning, then headed inside.
Swiss wanted to close his head in the door of his truck, multiple times.
It was going to be a long fucking day.
Rain slipped out the back door an hour or so after lunch. Wearing exhaustion and semi untamed curls, a brand of disheveled he’d never sported before. He was off the schedule they’d taken to over the last few weeks. Swiss’ lunch break was a little before two, and it was currently well past. Swiss could sigh and huff all he liked about him sleeping in and shirking his fruit picking responsibilities, as well as what he’d woefully described as ‘kiss withdrawls’, but Rain truly couldn’t be faulted for sleeping in. His sheets smelled like warm tobacco and aftershave, a little bit like hay and whatever it was truly encompassed Swiss. It was hard for rain to leave in the morning, silently hoping it would linger until he got back that night.
“Rain! I’ve been looking for you!”
Rain whipped around. Confused to see Dew running up to him from the side field, brushing debris off of his overalls. They had never spoken before, at least not directly like this. Small quips and comments when he finds himself at Swiss’ side that sound like they’re meant to be digs directed at him despite the fact Dew barely acknowledged his presence.
“I’m sorry?”
“I think we should have a talk, can you come here for a minute?” Dew kicked some rocks and pursed his lips at rain who looked more than confused. He looked around for Swiss, to see if this was one of his shenanigans or could at least save him from whatever was happening.
Dew knew their routine. Knew exactly how to intersect Rain’s path before he could go attach himself to Swiss like an overgrown leech. It was almost too easy for him to find and stop him. If Rain had any more confidence in himself he would’ve told Dew to leave him alone, return the same disdain Dew had regarded him with from the start, but he was alarmingly forward. Grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him with surprising ease towards the tractor for a bit more privacy. Less of a chance they’d be interrupted.
Dew, and the other workers by extension were far from fond of him. Swiss was the outlier. Rain knew fighting him on this would cause nothing but trouble.
“Where are you going by the way? Thought you didn’t have to do your small share of work till later.” Whatever over sweetness he’d greeted him with dropped from his tone, borderline sneering at him instead.
“Dad asked me to check on one of the cows, said she looked in bad shape this morning.” Rain readjusted the bag on his shoulder, eyes flitting towards the field with a silent prayer that Swiss might just happen to pop up. Save him from whatever he’d walked into.
“Bullshit,” Dew barely stopped himself from laughing at his lie. “He would’ve mentioned it to us, not you.” Dew crossed his arms, leaning on the tractor. Casually and subtly blocking off Rain’s easy exit back to the yard.
“Ok…Then what do you think I’m doing?” Rain scoffed and rolled his eyes. This was dumb, they both had better things to be doing.
“Considering that brown paper sack in your hands, and the little birdie that talks about you in the barn, I’d say you’re bringing Swiss a snack for his break” it’s the slight flick of his eyes that answers the silent accusation.
“I don’t see how what I do with my time is any of your business” Rain's voice was almost entirely confident, almost. The faintest waver under his incredulous stare. It was hard to hold steady when someone as intense as Dew was interrogating him like he was caught about to do something downright sinister.
“Well I just think it’s funny how much time you spend with him. All of your breaks, sneaking out to go to the bonfire, spending the night?” He practically hissed his last point. “Thought your dad didn’t like you spending too much time with people like us. Weird, huh?”
“I’m not like that, I’m not my father.” Rain felt almost guilty as dew continued to stare at him like he was disgusted. Had he really been that bad? He didn’t think he was that much of a priss before Swiss came around.
“Oh you aren’t? Rain, all you do is sit on your throne and occasionally feed the animals or pick fruit for daddy’s approval. I’ve heard what he’s said, what you’ve said.”
His face, with whatever increasingly anxious expression he’d been sporting, fell instantly. Comments from his father over the years rooted in overworked frustration when profits didn’t balance out costs, when equipment turned up broken, when the work wasn't done to his standards. Blindly throwing blame on his workers. And Rain, a teenager vying for his parent’s approval, stupidly echoed the sentiment more than once and turned his nose up at them and the work they did. Even went out of his way to avoid the lot of them at the behest of his father.
“Dew, I’m sorry…I never-“
“All I’m saying is don’t fuck around and break Swiss’ heart just because you’ve decided to enjoy the attention from the peasants” Dew spat. His tone growing increasingly more frustrated as the months or years of indignation began to finally bubble to the surface.
“That’s not-“ A finger is held up before he can begin to explain himself, effectively shutting him up before he could stammer any further.
“Save it princess, I don’t want to hear it! I’m warning you to stop fucking around with him - Swiss doesn’t deserve to be some passing fancy till you’re able to go back to that prestigious university of yours.”
Rain opened his mouth and quickly closed it when he couldn’t manage any sound. Dread filled his stomach and began clawing its way up his throat. Choking him.
Is that really what they all thought of him? Is that what Swiss thought all of this was?
“You’re a smart guy, yeah? You should be smart enough to know not to cross this clear line in the sand that you and your dad drew a long time ago. Go back to your fucking tower and stay there.”
And as quickly as his tirade began, it ended with Dew turning on his heel and storming off with his fists clenched at his sides. He’d said more than enough for Rain to get the message; none of them wanted anything to do with him, Swiss just didn’t know it yet. They all harbored a level of resentment Rain hadn’t quite comprehended apparently.
Rain didn’t walk after him. Stays rooted in place watching Dew stalk off towards the fields until the vague shape of him becomes blurry. Tears burned in his eyes. All he could do was shrink into himself and return to the house where he promptly shoved the paper bag to the bottom of the trash can. At least there, he could pretend he’d never made it to begin with.
Was he stupid? He felt like an idiot for ever thinking he could really have something as genuine as this.
Heat radiated within his chest and made itself known in the form of blotchy redness in his cheeks. He retreated to his room, bag dropped steps in front of his door in order to throw himself onto his bed like a teenage girl with a broken heart. They weren’t anything and yet it felt like his rib cage was caving in. Guilt, shame, and humiliation danced inside him. Mingled into a single sensation that made his throat painfully tight.
Rain hiccuped over a half sob, shoving both pillows off the bed and onto the floor. He didn’t need the reminder. With both pillows out of the way, he was met with the cotton candy blue shark he’d stuffed into hiding the night before. He wiped his eyes on his sleeve and pulled the plush against himself. Childish comforts.
Dew was right, telling him the things he was too selfish to acknowledge. None of them wanted him around, and maybe Swiss didn’t really either. Did Swiss only humor him because he was the boss’ son? Placate ‘the princess’ to keep his job. Dew was right. He didn’t deserve Swiss.
#I’m so sorry this took forever I promise we are committed to finishing it#I love this au so much#I hope you guys do too#please enjoy there’s a lot planned coming up <3#the band ghost#ghost#nameless ghouls#ghost bc#wrath writes#swiss ghoul#rain ghoul#dewdrop ghoul
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This has been on my mind for years now and I'm gonna say it:
They probably shared their first kiss with eachother in S1 E8 not S2 E3.
I think (and hope) we’ll eventually get a CaitVi sex scene in act3 that combines two timelines: one will set in the present, interspersed with flashbacks showing what happened in the aftermath of that earlier moment in bed.
In that case, I think this scene would make more sense (to me) in the second season:
Here, it feels like Vi is asking for permission to kiss Caitlyn, but due to the heightened emotional state brought on by the circumstances—especially the loss of her mother—Caitlyn isn’t able to open up fully, and Vi knows and respects that. And let’s not forget that in episode 8, Vi left Cait so she also have a reason to ask...
And don’t get me wrong, despite loving every single CaitVi scene (especially when they kiss), this particular scene has always bothered me a little:
I mean… it just didn’t feel like what a first kiss should be. The timing, the composition, the fact that they talk about Cait's mother and killing Jinx - It's just not right —it’s as if it was deliberately crafted to leave a subtle feeling lingering in my subconscious.
And we know that with the Arcane writers, nothing is accidental or rushed.
However, looking back, this scene gives so much more meaning to a first kiss.
It's calmer, more intimate, and deeply heartfelt. This is the first time Vi truly opens up and shows her vulnerable side.
As I rewatched their scenes together, something kept nagging at the back of my mind—especially during the second season, when we gained a broader perspective on their dynamic. In hindsight, I wouldn’t find it rushed, but for the sake of maintaining the series’ pacing, it wouldn’t have been ideal to include it. After all, it would have been less of a mystery for fans, and perhaps it would have lost its charm. especially considering the next scenes show Jinx enduring the greatest torment of her life just to survive.
Anyway, this was one of my Caitvi theories that has always lingered in my mind—finally, it felt good to write it down! :) Thank you for reading.
Also, this hint about King Princess would make so much sense.(for me at least)
#caitlyn kiramman#arcane#caitvi#vi#arcane s2 spoilers#arcane spoilers#vi arcane#arcane s2#arcane season 2#arcane discussion
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PAC: What should I focus on right now for long-lasting good vibes ?
When I leave Juice WRLD, I'm back to pink hair !
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PILE 1
Sweetheart, here’s what your heart needs to hear:
This moment is about embracing the magic of you. You’re a radiant Queen, with warmth in your soul and power in your every move. Taking this time for yourself isn’t stepping away from love—it’s leaning deeper into the one you have with your own spirit.
You’ve found something beautiful, something healthy and whole, but it’s okay to let it breathe. You’re not losing anything; you’re creating space to grow into the love that feels so new. Focus on nurturing your passions, tending to your dreams, and grounding yourself in your own brilliance.
The love will wait—it’s strong enough to do that. And in the meantime, remember: you are more than worthy of all the goodness coming your way.
What should I focus on right now for long-lasting growth?
Y’all took a fat L in your finance. It could be that maybe you were born in a poor family or maybe you maxed out your credit card at a super young age. Another scenario is comin through, some of y’all were financial abuse by your own parents. You were here paying one of our family members' medical bills while paying for your school. The situation of your family was a wake up call for you because you never knew they were in so much debt (And they fucking expected you to saved them… let me move on … I said I was going to be more gentle). Any ways most people would have scramble under so much pressure but you were determined to rise the fuck up. You motherfucking did ! CONGRATS !!!!!! Since you know how it feels to live in such a deprived state you put everything in your power not to fall back into it. You have built quite the financial literacy. Unlike your family you are sitting hoping for a miracle, you prefer having control over your own life. You let go off a good suitor that was going to give you stability. The ring, the house and the kids but you want more. You spent the last year living a basic life to save you and your family. Now you want to experiment with your looks, activities and learn more about your own desire. Don’t hate yourself because you choose’’ you’’ and sometimes choosing is not about a reason but a feeling. Believe me if they said they are going to wait… they are probably waiting. Don’t feel guilty because they are rooting for you and your happiness.
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2) Wanna know the love story the universe has for you? 💫 In 8 parts, I spill all: first meet, first kiss, confession, sexy time, and more. Don’t miss out! 👀💖 (LINK)
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PILE 2
Bestie, let me tell you something magical:
Focus on living in the beauty of your truth, unapologetically. Let your heart be guided by clarity, not illusions. You've grown, you've blossomed, and not everyone deserves to witness the garden you've nurtured. Some will see your glow and mistake it for something they can dim, but you know better.
Surround yourself with those who celebrate your growth, not those who sulk in the shadow of it. It’s okay to leave behind the ones who can’t appreciate the masterpiece you’ve become. Their energy was never meant to shape your future—it was meant to teach you what to protect.
Right now, bestie, the vibes are all about you. Shine boldly, love fiercely, and walk away from anything that makes your soul feel heavy. You’re stepping into your best self, and it’s time to embrace the joy of that without looking back.
What should I focus on right now for long-lasting growth?
Y’all just moved to your new house. You may be in decorating mode, making sure to buy all the essentials, making sure to organize the bills and if you need to renovate mama/papi is turning to DIY Bob the Builder. First of all, motherfucking CONGRATS! Moving in this economy is like one of the biggest achievements. You are advised to go hangout in your community doing something that resonates with you. Whether going to the movies, reading club, knitting classes or walking around in the mall or the park near your house. Because you may be feeling lonely and you hate going out on your own because it is making a matter worse but somebody is going to strike up a conversation with you. Y’all going to enter a new friend group that's going to feel like family. Head up Pile 2 the same way they are open about their emotions let them in because I swear all they want to do is know you, see you and love you. Also this feeling of wanting community may be new because you got so accustomed to being the ‘’weird kid’’ that nobody really wants to deal with but thank God you did not change because your soul family is one greeting away.
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2) Wanna know the love story the universe has for you? 💫 In 8 parts, I spill all: first meet, first kiss, confession, sexy time, and more. Don’t miss out! 👀💖 (LINK)
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PILE 3
Darling, let me wrap you in some truth:
This moment is yours to reclaim. You’re standing tall, blooming in your own power like the Empress you are—creative, abundant, and unstoppable. Staying firm in your decision to hold that no-contact boundary isn’t just strength; it’s self-love in its purest form.
You’re no longer chasing love that left you questioning your worth. You’ve grown beyond that, and now you’re building a life where your heart beats freely, unburdened by the echoes of what was. Focus on your business, your passions, your empire. Every step you take is a step toward the future you deserve.
Let them wonder about your glow from afar. You’re not here to dim your light for anyone who couldn’t see it before. Keep shining, bestie. Your journey is just beginning, and it’s a masterpiece in the making.
What should I focus on right now for long-lasting growth?
First congrats on your pregnancy. Y’all always wanted a kid and you actually thought that the father had his shit together but when it comes to standing for your baby or your ex. Is always going to your bundle of joy. On the other hand I feel like y’all are never going to do it again. Like pregnancy is not a fun experience. Y’all are not living a traumatic experience but just feeling uncomfortable all the time … ain’t it baby. Also you are so ready to meet your little one.
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2) Wanna know the love story the universe has for you? 💫 In 8 parts, I spill all: first meet, first kiss, confession, sexy time, and more. Don’t miss out! 👀💖 (LINK)
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#tarot#tarot reading#tarotcommunity#divination#tarot cards#pac#pick a card#pick a picture#pick a pile#divine timing#divine guidance#intuitive messages#intuitive guidance#intuition#free readings#free tarot readings#free tarot
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I'm honestly so curious about who made the call to rewrite ghostfuckers
given how long animation takes and that they were already at the board stage and how similar the antagonist and setting is to the episode proper, I'm not entirely sure I believe Viv's 'it was a different episode that we shelved' thing.
they can barely seem to do second drafts given all the continuity errors but for this one episode they basically started over??
It feels like it can only be in response to the leaks - or rather the backlash to the leaks
and that's curious to me because whenever there's been backlash before Viv's response is usually to double down and just start liking tweets of people defending her writing, regardless of how bad their points or or how unprofessional it makes her look
she must have seen all the convos around Stol1tz in the lead up to full moon dropping but that didn't get a rewrite. it got delayed to basically the last second but I still don't know why - there's nothing noticeably higher quality about that ep and they didn't do the bare minimum of rewriting or recording that sad little 'I didn't know you think so low of me' to be nails on a chalkboard awful
she's basically committed the entire back half of the season to blaming Blitzo for daring to stand up for himself and not immediately be at Stolas' beck and call and large chunks of the fandom - even those who still believe Stolas will realize that he's in the wrong (or equally in the wrong, I guess is what some are going with). if the audience isn't into that the show is dead in the water
and yet backlash over driving Millie to suicide was enough to make her trash a whole episode? given Brandon eventually rewrote by himself the real version it makes me wonder if other people in the studio pressured her into redoing it and she made Brandon do it solo as a 'fine if we have to do a rewrite you do it' sort of attitude. even then she has script supervising credits, probably because she didn't trust him not to have someone point out the Stolas thing is completely wild
it's kinda sad because it felt like Brandon was trying to right the ship by giving Millie a backstory and something resembling a character dynamic with Blitzo. it's not a great episode but it's leagues better than the unpleasant shitshow of the last two Viv written outings with Stolas in them and the group is once again in the forefront (funny how that happens whenever Viv isn't the one writing the script)
bu even that wasn't enough, because the views are showing HB is increasingly dead in the water. if they even make it to s4 we might be looking at something totally outsourced getting only 5M views tops, if not lower
"I'm not entirely sure I believe Viv's 'it was a different episode that we shelved' thing."
Nor should you. Viv's a notorious liar, and not a particularly good one, and I'd be willing to stake real money on the episode being rewritten solely because of the leaks. It couldn't have been easy on the animators, going back to the drawing board, but when has Viv ever cared about her animators before?
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I will confess that I have started watching Arcane (knowing absolutely nothing about the source material whatsoever) after seeing all your flailing on my dash. I am currently about halfway through season 1; how braced should my body be?
I am SORRY it took me so long to reespond to this but I literally saw this message and froze because HOW do I even respond to this without spoilers??
It is the most tightly written, masterful writing I've ever seen pretty much ever in television. BECAUSE the music AND animation is all controlled in-house, you as a viewer don't need to worry you're crazy for thinking that tiny micro-expression meant something. IT DOES. It took them a week to animate every 4 seconds so yeah, if you think your ship is exchanging a heartfelt look, it is actually happening, there's no accidental moments here and it's SO rewarding to close viewers.
Imma be honest, Arcane S1 was lovely the first time I watched it, but the moment I became a bonkers screaming evangelist for it was when I REWATCHED S1 and realized just how tightly written it is. Every single moment is written to build towards the final scene of S1 and it is so tightly done that you can pretty much freeze-frame anywhere and scream at the screen because if THIS MOMENT had gone differently, the final scene wouldn't have happened. And it's just. Incredible as a structure-focused writer like me to witness so as a brilliant writer yourself, I will say, S1 is worth a re-watch just from a Structure Writer's angle.
S2 has been even more nutty lately but until this Saturday I don't know what the complete work will look like so I'm swiftly losing my mind and chewing the dry wall while I wait. So far, it's incredibly epic and I have so much faith in these writers that even as I create crazy theories, I don't mind if they're wrong, because I trust them so implicitly that whatever they come up with will be BETTER than what I did. But, if I am right about my theory, I will probably be catatonic for a week because of Emotions.
So... tl;dr.... braced???
#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane meta#I can't scream and cry and recommend this show enough just as a WRITER yall
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Okay, EVERYONE, listen.
This feels like roughly the one hundredth time that I've seen someone on this earth complain about the antisemitism on Wikipedia. And I need us all to understand just one thing:
WE ARE WIKIPEDIA!!!!!!!!
Every single one of us has just as much power to edit that freaking page and put in the information from the Holocaust Encyclopedia as whoever fucked it up did.
You don't even need to make a Wikipedia account.
(But it's easier to keep track of what you change, and discuss changes with people, if you do.)
You can add anything you can back up with a citation.
(You can, in fact, also add things you CAN'T back up with a citation. As I'm sure we've all noticed. And I might as well point out here that you can ALSO add things you can't back up, and put in citations that DO NOT BACK UP WHAT YOU SAID.
You shouldn't. And hopefully, people like me will notice and change it. But you CAN.
My point here is actually that when you're doing research about something important and complicated, you should always click through to see what the source cited really says.
Because frequently, someone will be wrong about either what they're writing, or whether their source backs it up. This happens in academic papers too. Critical thinking is hard.)
You write whatever you want. You type the period. Then you type in your citation.
Under the cut, I'll show you how. It's really easy. Or you can use Wikipedia's guide!
It even lets you preview your changes before you finish, so you know if you're making a mess.
And there's a place where you can briefly explain why you're editing it. Like "adding details about Nazi connections," or "correcting punctuation."
And yes. Not all of us can edit every article on Wikipedia; "controversial" topics are frequently locked so that only "extended-confirmed" editors can change them. (Which just means "people who are logged in and have made at least 500 edits.")
But you can join in the discussions on those articles.
And on Wikipedia, "they're too Zionist!" is not an acceptable argument.
Sometimes people "watch" an article to get notified when it changes. (You can do this too!)
Sometimes they do that so they can revert the exact kind of change you're there to make.
But they have to put in a reason for reverting it. Which means you can also change it back, argue them out of it, or make changes to make it work. (example under the cut!)
The way you add a citation/reference looks like html gibberish salad. But it basically goes:
put in a tag that says "ref," so it automatically gets added to the list of references cited at the bottom of the Wikipedia page;
put in "cite" and what you're citing, like a book, a video, a website, a journal. Getting the type right doesn't really seem to be a big deal. In this case, you want to put "web."
And then there are a fuckton of different things you can add, which get separated by pipes. Pipes are that long vertical line that's probably above your enter key: |
You need the URL. That's... kind of all you need.
pro tip: going back in to add more details to the citation later counts as more edits!
Even though you only NEEEEED the URL, it's really good to add other details like the title of the page (if there is one), the publisher (Holocaust Encyclopedia), the day you looked at it (because websites can change over time), and it's especially nice to go dig up an archived version of the site and the date of the archive. Because links break.
oh yeah and my favorite thing to add: a quote from your source, so that people don't have to click through to verify what it says! this can be a great way to add more information that seems too long for the Wikipedia article.
So, broken up with lots of space for easier reading, it looks like this. We'll pretend we're doing one on Heinrich Himmler, because I have no idea who anon was looking at:
<ref> {{cite web | url = https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/heinrich-himmler | access-date = November 19, 2024}} </ref>
That's a very short "I just found this url, today" version. Here's a more thorough citation:
<ref>{{cite web | url = https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/heinrich-himmler | access-date = November 19, 2024 | publisher = Holocaust Encyclopedia | title = Heinrich Himmler | archive-url = https://web.archive.org/web/20241008214021/https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/heinrich-himmler | archive-date = October 8, 2024 | quote = As Reichsführer SS, Himmler received authority directly from Hitler to carry out ideological policies that the laws of the state might not permit. This ideologically rooted “Führer authority” enabled authorization of indefinite incarceration and mass murder.}}</ref>
I bet someone out there even knows of a website where you can paste in the url you're citing, and get all that code automatically generated for you.
Oh - here's my example of getting into a silly debate about something that should be cut and dried, and changing shit to make it work!
I came across the page for GUPS, the General Union of Palestinian Students. It made the ludicrous statement that the group OFFICIALLY started in the 1950s, but had been around since the 1920s.
I was like: ok, there's no place that says this other than their cited source, a now-gone website for the San Francisco State University chapter of GUPS. There were no universities in Palestine in the 1920s. This is clearly not true.
I took that part out. Someone REVERTED IT, and told me that all I'd proven was that it wasn't logical, not that the citation was wrong!
We argued back and forth a bit. I ended up finding a fuckton of Arabic-language sources with more information, and showing that none of them talked about it starting in the 1920s. This person said, "no, that source says it started in the 1950s, and evolved from this other group that started in the same Egyptian university, which had started in the 1920s! It never said that it had started in PALESTINE in the '20s!"
I haven't even dealt with that one yet lmao. Normally, I would probably just demand a source that showed the original group had started in the 1920s, and then maybe change it to like "it evolved from this other non-palestinian student group that started in 192X."
But the thing is... while I was doing all this digging, I found soooo much information about how GUPS was connected to the PLO. How it had become a part of the PLO when the PLO was an active terrorist organization. All kinds of crap.
And you can fucking bet that all of it is going into the article.
This thing is going to end up being a detailed piece about every terrible thing GUPS and the PLO have ever done.
It's going to be beautiful. And nobody will ever be able to argue that any of it is incorrect. It will go from "this is a normal club that goes sooo far back, it's considered the first Palestinian group ever" to "this is a normal terrorist club that was rooted in the movement to terrorize Jews, like in the 30s when X happened, like in the late 30s when Y happened, like this series of PLO massacres in this decade, like--"
went to wikipedia to fact check somethings about a guy from ww2 era history and it had been edited beyond belief to erase this person's connections with nazi germany. the second google result is the holocaust encyclopedia page all about his horrible crimes in the nazi regime. but on wikipeida, his description is vague and mild and barely mentions it. it's so worrying. I hate it. what happens when gen z only reads wikipedia pages and denounces any sources that are "too zionist" like a holocaust museum's encyclopedia? thank g-d for jewish historians, what would we do without them, but i'm so so scared that our history is going to be rewritten because no one will listen to us on our own history.
.
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THIS YEAR'S LANTERN RITE HURTS SO BAD!! We could have had to utter DADDIES but instead they chose to make them npcs😭😭 Why mihoyo WHY!!
#genshin impact#lantern rite#I should probably write something to right this wrong#genshin impact x reader
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it’s like baby gorl there’s no way I, the author who wrote the fic you’re commenting on and who is the intended audience for this comment, am gonna agree with you 😿🙏 some things can just stay on your chest 🙏
#there’s a threshold I think of what I accept in comments about characters#and their actions or about who is in the wrong or what should happen#because I do like reading people’s opinions#and sometimes when someone is like I didn’t like obi-wan in this fic#I’m like makes sense! maybe you weren’t supposed to or maybe the argument they had was supposed to not be clear cut on who is right#because arguments in real life don’t always have a clear cut winner or morally superior person lmao#I’m ok with that I’m ok with comments saying boo this character is annoying#because sometimes they just are (eg the amount of people who just don’t like obiwan in pbatmb like?? yeah of course he’s not gonna be nice#but I digress lol#anyway but there’s a threshold of when comments about not liking a character go too far and you’re just like.#saying mean things about the writing itself and that’s not something lm gonna allow to be normalized#no matter the intention behind it#you do not type a comment like this knowing it wil be send to an author#who will get an email notification about a comment#click on it and go oooo long comment :D and then go oh.#you don’t do that it’s rude it’s being a jerk#I’ve been here for like 3 almost 4 years I feel ancient in this fandom sometimes#and I’ve gotten so much feedback on my work through that time and so many nice comments and community#but mean comments can really hurt especially new writers#and they can make people who maybe would write fic for a fandom decide to not#like this isn’t even that mean I can almost see the writer just wanting to say how they feel#but sometimes you do not have to 🙏#also I just think this understanding of the characterizations in the fic and probably their understanding of the characters in the films#is a wee bit trash but that’s for me to say in the long tags of my own blog post and not for me to comment on their fics for the fandom#(they don’t have any but I did check because 3am kit felt nosy)
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there's a moment in lesson 45 of nightbringer where mc falls off a thing (again?? is this foreshadowing?? i'm going to rule-of-three this and wait to see if it happens again) and satan tries and fails to grab their hand to catch them, but now i'm imagining the same thing happening with satan and ik except he does succeed, but it's her right hand and the prosthetic just POP comes straight off
#nightbringer spoilers#ik is fine but satan is mildly traumatised#misc thoughts#obey me satan#couldn't sleep so i decided on a whim to do the lesson#i really wasn't planning to for a while after 44 and tbh that was the right decision#it feels like they just completely dumbed beel down?? and i can't tell if they're trying to telegraph that Something Is Wrong#or if they just totally forgot how to write him. which has been happening to him consistently since like s3#we did get more confirmation that simeon's going through smth... but this feels like it's shaping up to be another og s4#where the entire main-plot-that-should-probably-be-focused-on-simeon is just happening in the background while mc does side quests#and then they're gonna spring the twist on us right at the end or immediately before the climax without proper foreshadowing/building it up#i realise i'm being pessimistic here but i'm losing hope in this season with each lesson they release. and we're only 5 in#i'd be delighted to be proven wrong though
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rtd's finales are badly stacked conflicts that are suddenly solved by deus ex machina (but that doesn't matter bc it's filled with genuinely beautiful & heartwrenching character writing that will make you forget about everything) and moffat's finales are convoluted nonsense that make you confused as to what the fuck you're even watching. technically neither of these are good but between these two poisons i will pick the former every time
#disclaimer im biased and you should all take my media criticism with a grain of salt#bc i genuinely do not care how well constructed a thing is if the character writing is good enough.#like that's all im there for. my senses are honestly kind of primed to enjoy rtd's style over anyone else's#dr who#the real question i ask myself is 'will moffat get better at writing finales in twelve's run'#and the answer i have for myself right now is 'hopefully it does in s10 bc i want it to be good'#but i am so absolutely not sure of this.#bc i can definitively say that inside man (2022) by moffat is like. by far the worst thing of his ive ever seen#so i cant use the 'he probably got better with time' reassurance. i think something is wrong with him#misc
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I love the original Cars 2006 game so much. The one that got released on like GameCube and Xbox. I mean, I love all the Cars games(Cars 3 Switch game they did you dirty), but that's an entire story for another time giving my individual appriciation for all of them later. What I'm going to say here applies pretty well to the other games that are centered around the first movie as well like Race-O-Rama and Maternationals, but I'm specifcally rewatching the original one's cutscenes again because I don't want to restart my data every time I wanna go through the cutscenes again(even though I enjoy playing it so, so much), and I just love the atmosphere in it so much. Some of my favorite movie scenes are the ones where they don't have any music playing because I love to close my eyes and turn up the volume and just.. pretend I am right there with the characters and right next to them and stuff or that they're talking to me or such, and that is extra immersible when there isn't an entire orchestra going on(not that I am knocking at having music at all, I regularly go back and listen to the soundtracks from movies if they have them posted).
And the game doesn't really have any music at all during any of the cutscenes and the whole thing is like super..soft to me? Not soft as in like fluffy pillows and pink aesthetic soft, but soft as in like it's getting late out and so you're trying to be kinda hushed with your voice and there's not really anywhere you have to be so you slow down your pace and kick a couple of pinecones or rocks. If that makes any sense at all. Cause normally movies or shows(whether the whole series or each individual episode) have a certain plot or arc that is happening that everyone is focused on and consumes the whole thing, give or take a few moments. And while this game does have a particular thing so it can have a start and end to the story of the game, everything is framed in like a "Yeah, this is what they get up to in their freetime." And I don't know if you know but I love my slice of life stuff so sooooooo so so infinitely much. So getting to get that sort of content is really fun and perfect for me. It's like you're just actively hanging around them and getting caught up in whatever typical nonsense they end up in(assuming we are ignoring the whole monster truck bit), and the "OH THINGS ARE. HITITNG THE FAN." Or bigger development moments are saved for like the movies or something or whatever comes up in my head.
I'm not really entirely headed anywhere with this, I just wanted to put out some appriciation for the game and how nice the atmosphere is. I think it's also cause I really love getting to just sit and here them talk and there is a lot of casual conversation that happens and just plain dialog. Like it's not even filler dialog it's just talking and chatting. And I spend a stupid silly amount of time listening to voiceline compilations on YouTube so this is just the bees knees for me.
Thank you for the read though, may I offer you with a clip because APPERENRLY there's a limit to one clip per post that I am just now finding out about. I think I've already talked about the Litnig one anyway. Maybe I'll post it again later.
I uuuuguguhhh also perfectly reached the tag limit. If anyone needs anything to do in their freetime while bored or as a filler may I suggest reading this post and it's tags, you will be occupied for a while IFNFJCJFNS. I was half joking about reaching the tag limit as well. Well, we all saw it coming, it was going to have to happen one day. And go figure after a long absence that I was going to have it in me to do some running of my mouth...
I do want to say I am probably back now yall! Knock on wood- but I think the reign of my absence is over! Which I am especially hoping so for several reasons but also because I am so SO not done milking F/Ovember to its full extent. I spent too many months looking forward to that to not invest and rot my blog with it.
#honorable mention to Lightning encountering the tuners and they have some beef with each other and so Lightning goes to Wingo-#-and says “What? Are you going to slice and dice me with your spoiler?” AND IM. I LOVE THEM DONT GET ME WRONG BUT.#Lightning just obliterated them with that comment. Shot were fired and RETURNED TO SENDER.#I knowwww the movies are centered around Lightning going through character development but I hope they don't ever-#-completely take away his case of not being able to completely keep his mouth shut in certain moments.#Dare I say. He has a bit of sass to him. Which I mean I completely get why it's practically gone in the second and third movies-#-cause he's no longer an arrogant rookie. But I like to think if he really gets pushed then some of it will show. That it still lingers.#I mean. The second movie doesnt open up with him going “Cmon Mater. Im Lightning McQueen I can do anything!”#because he's entirely dropped any of his arrogance. because he hasn't.#Opening of Cars 3 and he's PLAYING PRAMKS WITH BOBBY AND CAL. And it is a RUNNING thing they have going on.#Let him be silly. He's silly guys.#I actually had other things that I wanted to mention here and then I got caught up in talking about Lightning whoops.#The entire game is centered around him okay what am I supposed to do.#Do I even dare go on my tangent about Chick now. Cause I will probably get close to the tag limits.#Okay I'm going to speedrun my thing of Chick.#Obligatory mention of his voice. uhm. I love the 180° attitude change that happens to him over this clip.#The entire game he is in like the racing official's camera's face about everything and now that I think about it at least-#-Cars 3 was right about giving him his own talk show. but. Chick shutting his mouth for a second and actually showing-#-proper concern over something that isn't tragically derived from something that is therapy worthy is such a sight to see.#Yea okay Kane you always talk about how the movies would be different if you were in it. Now how about the GAMES.#The games that have proper story and plot to them. I am not counting the Cars 2 games as plot.#1. becuase the DS one is just a rip of what extra stuff the movie WAS going to contain before it got cut down cause it was like 2 hours at-#-first. and 2. because the other Xbox game literally has 5 minutes of “This is a thing that is happening!”#Cars 3 Switch game is on the world's thinnest ice for having such a poorly slapped together thing to call a story or plot line.#THE PIXAR XBOX RUSH GAME AND DISNEY INFINITY ARE DIFFERENT.#I'm not going to say what those games have done to me because it will make me have to write a second novel and-#-I will be crying and frothing at the mouth. I should not have reminded myself of the Pixar Rush game.#If I make a post about Finn very soon do not be surprised. I mean. Dont be surprised in general. But extra dont be surrpsied here.#lightning❤️🧡💛#finn🩶💙
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footnotes arent enough I need you to talk to me like im fucking Amelia Bedelia
#this isn’t about anything in particular btw. I just have to add a lot of memos when I’m doing things because some things are done a certain#way and it isn’t explained well in the instructions. like my mom has instructions on her baking recipes right#but when it says stuff like add dry ingredients to wet ingredients it also means you don’t dump it in one go you add it slowly by portion#this is probably why I find videos and demonstrations the most helpful when I learn something. like I almost always ask someone to show me#how they do it because there could be something they do that’s already second nature and wouldn’t really be considered in an explanation yk#I don’t think I’m an exception either. when the rice is done cooking I divide it into 4 quarters to bless it#but there are a million ways to divide rice and it makes me think that one persons way of doing it or not doing it all is just as valid#theres also technically no wrong way to divide rice afaik. this means either all ways of dividing rice is safe or valid until we find some#universally terrible way of dividing rice. until that happens nobody really thinks about specifying HOW you divide the rice#source: I have anxiety starting and doing things for the first time because I got way too many people yell at me NONONO WHAT ARE YOU DOING#THATS WRONG while I’m in the middle of doing the thing. I would rather have people think I’m either very stupid or overly specific#than go thru the panic inducing fear of ‘YOURE DOING THIS WRONG OMG WHY DIDNT YOU ASK AHEAD OF TIME THIS WILL BE FUCKED UP FOREVER’ 🧍#nothing wrong if you don’t give something a second thought because you’re so used to it. but I can and will ask about it and I don’t think I#really should feel bad about it if I don’t know enough to dispute it. idk#the other way around I try to be as specific as possible and word things in a way that people who might not get where I’m coming from will#understand. but the problem with that is my explanations tend to be lengthy and I lose them either way 🗿#Im. trying to work on that using examples and stuff because they seem to work the best#but if I could write everything down on a word doc and beam it into your melon that would save both of us time and embarassment#im rambling the short version is I have adhd#yapping
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Is my discomfort with my boobs gender dysphoria, body dysmorphia, or just a general discomfort with the sensations of having a human body that comes with possible neurodivergency
#ramblings#it's probably all three tbh#it's not severe. like i can live with this. it's fine#but also i generally wish i had a flatter chest#every time i imagine myself in my head i see myself with a flatter chest#but like do i wanna go through the trouble of getting rid of them entirely#or should i just try getting a binder or something#or should i just. leave things as they are#idfk#i don't think top surgery would be an option bc money and. i'm scared of surgery honestly#and the recovery looks painful as shit#and like what if i regret it? what if i was wrong and that wasn't the best option for me?#i think i should just try to get a binder or something. just see how that works for me#and contemplate surgery when i'm older and can support myself and am more sure of whether that's right for me or not#also i'm. hesitant to call it anything bc again it's not really that severe#it's like. a thought that occassionally crosses my mind. at least once a day.. and doesn't leave for a while....#hm yeah no maybe it's not as mild as i thought it was actually. wonderful realization to come to in the middle of writing a post#anyways. idk if anyone has any binder recs or anything i'll take 'em#also maybe tips on how to approach my mom abt this?? idk if feels like something i should talk abt with her but idk how to even bring it up
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