#I should post selfies more often
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certifieddudette · 11 months ago
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Got some new touys!! Tabletop D&D finally gave me an excuse to buy one of these and omg.. I'm in love!!
Crazy scientist lab reveal + bonus crazy scientist reveal!
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aberrsary · 1 year ago
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Selfie?
Idk how old this Ask is because Tumblr is Like That, but here are some pics of me :3
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bondagebimbo · 1 month ago
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was glowing to the fucking GODS earlier with this highlight ngl
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fireis-catching · 2 years ago
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red is my color 💋
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pegglefan69 · 8 months ago
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tdov always comes around when I have a bad hair day lol. here is a photo of me holding a teapot instead. I'll have been on testosterone for 8 years in May...wild...
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icantalk710 · 10 months ago
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Some pretty scenic cloudy views on my jog today
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dumbbunnii · 2 years ago
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(^.~)
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scootatwoni · 1 year ago
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miki shirt miku shirt
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arhvste · 6 months ago
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“this is killing me.” kuroo mumbled as he tossed his phone to his side. “just trust me bro,” his best friend-turned roommate bokuto grinned. “this works everytime for me i swear!”
kuroo sighed before grabbing phone again to refresh his instagram story views once more. several people had already viewed the post-gym mirror selfie he’d taken in attempts to garner attention from one particular follower of his; you. “maybe it’s too cringe…” he muttered while over analysing the photo that had already gained a couple of likes within the twenty minutes it had already been up for. “nah.” bokuto reassured him and pat his friend on the shoulder. “you look sexy.” kuroo stared back at the two-toned haired boy. “… thanks bro.”
this isn’t something kuroo would typically post but times were tough and he was desperate. he’d seen you around campus but luck was not on his side when it came to scheduling and the two of you barely had class time together. yet the little class time you did share, kuroo hung onto it tightly and would let scenes of these weekly one hour classes replay in his head more often than he’d like to admit.
“i feel like a modern jay gatsby,” the ex volleyball captain huffed. “my selfie is the equivalent of the wild parties he’d throw in hopes to get daisy’s attention except i don’t want to post every night, i’ve already made myself cringe with this one post.” bokuto stared back at his friend blankly. “yeah… whatever that means.” kuroo frowned back “it’s a classic, you should know what i mean!”
how much longer was he going to have to wait? bokuto had promised him quick results with this method and so far he’d felt deceived and lied to. if talking to you when he got the chance wasn’t enough to get a conversation going outside the classroom, then social media seemed like the next best attempt to start interacting more.
what were you doing? why weren’t you viewing his story? could you even see his story? did he accidentally block you?
these questions ran through his mind as he quickly rushed to check to make sure he hadn’t for some reason blocked you from seeing his story. he half wished he did because then at least he’d know what on earth was taking you so damn long to see the photo he was increasingly starting to hate more the longer it was posted.
“this is stupid.” he stated as he faced bokuto who had zero concerns in his method in gaining someone’s attention. “it works you just have to wait, trust me.”
kuroo frowned as the little red hearts of others who weren’t you fluttered from the bottom corner of the photo. “look!” his best friend grinned as he leaned over kuroo’s shoulder and pointed to the screen of his phone. “you’re getting likes on it!”
“what’s the point if they’re not likes from the person i posted this for in the first place.” kuroo grumbled back in response. he couldn’t believe he’d been subjected to such an attempt to gain some attention from you. it was ridiculous.
it had been about forty five minutes since he’d posted it and he was slowly losing his mind. sure, the post was going to be up for twenty four hours (if he didn’t give into the voices in his head telling him to delete it) so forty five minutes was nothing, but the minutes were beginning to feel like hours and he was dying inside. why weren’t you viewing it already and what could possibly be keeping you off your phone right now?
“this is stupid.” he decided as notifications from his old team mates started to flash up on his screen. the last thing he needed was lev replying with ‘looksmaxing’ to a post that was secretly dedicated to you. “no, it’s barely been up!” bokuto whined. “you look hot so you should get some replies anyway what’s the big deal?”
pinching the bridge of his nose, kuroo huffed. “the big deal is the person i posted this for hasn’t replied!” what was the point in making sure to go to the gym during a rest day just to take this photo if he wasn’t going to at least make his existence more known to you? he’d even worked his legs enough to the point of managing to achieve the sweaty but sexy look. the muscles in his legs were dying, but his dignity sure as hell wouldn’t.
the college student opened up his phone with the intention to end the mental war inside his head once and for all by deleting the post altogether. bokuto watched his friend in defeat but his eyes flashed. “yes they did!” he yelled and pointed to the screen as your name flashed at the top of his screen.
kuroo’s heart jumped at the sight of your profile picture he’d made a daily routine of staring at and the now blue dot indicating a message from your profile in his inbox. to think he was going to delete this post just a second too, what were the chances?
psyching himself up, kuroo took a few quiet deep breathes before letting the time next to your message pass for a few minutes. he wasn’t an instagram warrior by any means, but he knew enough about general rules in order to not look desperate online.
bokuto watched over his friends shoulders as the two stared in anticipation awaiting the message kuroo had been dying for. this was it. leg day two times in a row was gruelling and he’d regret it for the next few days but it would have been worth it. the countless messages from his old teammates mocking his attempts at a thirst trap could be looked past now that you had finally given into the bait he’d so carefully laid. this is what he’d been waiting for. days of preparing and deciding how to gain your attention had finally paid off and he was about to reap the rewards he’d sown.
clicking the message with baited breath, his heart raced as bokuto’s grip of his shoulder tightened. finally.
‘the label on your shirt is sticking out, make sure to cut it’
“a wins a win.” bokuto filled the silence between the pair as kuroo stared at his phone with a blank expression. “… a wins a win…”
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fastandcarlos · 2 months ago
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Baby Perez Is Mine : ̗̀➛ Max Verstappen
summary: after getting to know your brother’s team mate max, you soon find that it’s more than just a friendship that’s struck between the two of you
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
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liked by schecoperez, lilymhe and 179,583 others
ynperez: always a joy to pay a visit to red bull and make sure everyone knows that mexicans obviously do it best ❤️💙
27,058 comments
username1: I just love how supportive yn is of sergio and his whole career!
schecoperez: thanks for always making sure there’s at least one sergio fan in the crowd 😘
ynperez: @/schecoperez always got your back brother 🫶🏻
username2: it’s nice to see someone in a red bull hat with two 1s on it for a change
maxverstappen1: tell that to the driver’s standings loser 😂
ynperez: @/maxverstappen1 we don’t accept any perez slander in this house thank you!!
username3: it’s the way she just pops up at all these random races for me 😂
carlossainz55: want me to show you the spanish way? 🇪🇸
ynperez: @/carlossainz55 can assure you no one is as smooth as a perez 😏
username4: thank you yn for always being sergio’s number one fan 🥺
username5: ngl max gives me annoying middle sibling vibes when he’s with these two 😂
lilymhe: sorry you were at the race and didn’t think to come and see me 😤
ynperez: @/lilymhe sorryyyyy it was just too busy, I promise next time I’m yours 🥺
username6: the way that most of the drivers and wags love yn more than anyone else speaks volumes 🔊
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
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liked by lancestroll, redbullracing and 582,048 others
schecoperez: such a proud weekend to be racing at home with so much support. thank you to everyone in mexico for all the love 🇲🇽🏎️
37,048 comments
maxverstappen1: super race and lots of points, let’s push on to the end of the season 💪🏻
username7: no one can convince me that these two aren’t secretly the cutest pairing on the grid
ynperez: most of that love was from me btw, loudest in the grandstand by far 🥲
schecoperez: @/ynperez have I mentioned your the best baby sister ever 🤔
username8: I hope you heard us nice and loud whilst you were driving around today sergio 🫶🏻
username9: thank you for always bringing the party to the podium ❤️
estebanocon: you should race at home more often if you perform like that
username10: such an incredible weekend, we’re all so proud of you sergio!!
landonorris: idk where that hat came from but I need one asap 😂
schecoperez: @/landonorris we don’t just give these out to any random guy you know
username11: I’m not ready for this weekend to be over already…
danielricciardo: huge race buddy, congrats on some super points 💪🏻
username12: not me not wondering when we’ll next get to see yn and sergio together again 💔
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 2,859,261 others
maxverstappen1: no better way to spend a week off than exploring the world with my favourite person 🥺 (who also bribes me with beer to take selfies so it’s worth it 😭🍺)
274,261 comments
charles_leclerc: fancy telling us who the lucky girl is that’s taken the max verstappen off the market!?!?
username13: I was not prepared for max to drop this bomb on us today
alex_albon: look at you being all mysterious and secretive on instagram 😂
redbullracing: all we needed to do was buy a beer to stop you giving admin a breakdown with your shocking social posts…
maxverstappen1: @/redbullracing admin can comment when you’ve got more followers than me ☺️
username14: whoever this girl is, she must make max incredibly weak for him to agree to take a selfie 😂
landonorris: congrats on being able to finally take a half decent photo 👏🏻
username15: boyfriend era max can be welcomed with open arms!!
schecoperez: we work together every week and fail to mention you’ve got a girlfriend 🙄
maxverstappen1: @/schecoperez you have to promise not to kill me if I share…
schecoperez: @/maxverstappen1 you can’t tell me something like that and not elaborate!!
danielricciardo: if I knew beer was all it took I’d have got you social media trained years ago 🤦🏻‍♂️
username16: who is this favourite person and how can I take their place???
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
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liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo and 193,747 others
ynperez: turns out the dutch just as good as the mexicans 🥺🏎️
38,372 comments
username17: wtf this is the plot twist that I did not see coming 😱
schecoperez: still getting over this absolute betrayal btw 😭
ynperez: @/schecoperez I promise you’re still secretly my number one 🫶🏻
landonorris: wasn’t happy with f1 driver in your life so decided to pull another too ☺️
username18: and now I remember why yn is so popular with all the other drivers 😂
danielricciardo: last time I checked max was mine and now you come along and stolen him 😭
carmenmmundt: why do i feel like I’ve blinked and missed a whole load of chapters here???
ynperez: @/carmenmmundt answer your damn phone and I’ll fill you in!!
username19: why do I feel like I’ve missed out on so many chapters in the story here
alex_albon: I hope you’re only making reference to their driving in that caption 🤔
ynperez: @/alex_albon @/lilymhe come get your man and his head out the gutter please!!
username20: rip sergio 😭 he must be a ruined man right now
username21: how did none of us actually see this coming with how close they are??
flavy.barla: emergency date night for all the details is pending…
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liked by alex_albon, oscarpiastri and 327,509 others
ynperez: for all the red bull girlies terrified I had ruined the team forever, here’s the three of us are playing a game of padel to remind you that red bull are gonna win the championship again this year! ❤️💙
52,927 comments
username22: if there’s one person who always believes in red bull it’s yn 🤩
maxverstappen1: you nearly ruined the relationship by picking to play with sergio instead of me 😭
ynperez: @/maxverstappen1 you were better than the two of us combined anyway 😂
username23: why do I feel like yn was more there to be cheerleader than actually player??
landonorris: wondering where my invite to this game was??
danielricciardo: @/landonorris funnily enough the text didn’t arrive on my phone either
oscarpiastri: @/danielricciardo @/landonorris I thought it was just me who’d been forgotten 💔
ynperez: @/oscarpiastri that’s because you’re so bad you make me look good at padel 😂
username24: I also want to be part of these padel games fyi 🙌🏻
schecoperez: that’s what we call a fake smile trying to not be sick watching the two of you together 🤮
ynperez: @/schecoperez you love us both really 💙
lancestroll: when they said red bull was a happy family, I didn’t realise quite how close that family was 😂
username25: these photos summarise the team perfectly, sergio just happy to be here whilst max is super focused and competitive!
georgerussell63: next time we’ll have to play a game together
carmenmmundt: @/georgerussell63 @/ynperez we can sit and gossip whilst the boys play more like 😂
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
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liked by schecoperez, charles_leclerc and 3,842,162 others
maxverstappen1: so proud to win another world title and do it with my best friend right by my side. thank you for all the incredible support this year, red bull fans really are the best ❤️🏆💙
482,172 comments
ynperez: couldn’t be happier to be there by your side today, congratulations on an incredible season darling 💞
maxverstappen1: @/ynperez you’re the best prize to come out of this season still 💞
username26: were all so proud of you max, yet another incredible season 🎉
landonorris: next year I’m coming for your ass just so you know 😉
username27: this thread of photos must have sergio raging in his driver’s room somewhere
schecoperez: don’t remember my sister being the one to race alongside you all season 🤷🏻‍♂️
username28: never in doubt, we all always knew you’d do it max!!
danielricciardo: I always knew you’d do it all those years ago…and look where we are now!
username29: best friend 🥺 if you listen closely you can hear sergio’s heart breaking…
charles_leclerc: it’s been an honour as always to race alongside you this season! 👏🏻
username30: it can’t be denied that these two are just the cutest!
username31: who knew a dutch and a mexican could be so well suited 🤩
redbullracing: our champion and our driver, we couldn’t be happier to have you with us max ❤️💙
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
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liked by ynperez, schecoperez and 3,117,058 others
maxverstappen1: turns out I forgot to mention the other perez in my life, so shout out to sergio for being the best teammate ever and introducing me to his smoking hot sister 🔥
317,028 comments
schecoperez: this was almost a cute caption until I read that last sentence…and now I want to knock you out 🥊
maxverstappen1: @/schecoperez just remember the bit where I told you you were the best teammate ever 😘
username32: how have I only just noticed how chaotic this duo is 😂
username33: admin hurry up and bring us more content from these two asap!
username34: max better start running whilst sergio hunts down his ass
username35: I wonder if yn realises what she’s started with these two now 🤔
username36: how has it taken me this long to realise how good of a team these two are 😂
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
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liked by landonorris, alexandrasaintmleux and 328,018 others
ynperez: best date ever to watch my best friend get married 🥂 so happy to spend your special day with you sergio and carolina 💞
38,472 comments
username37: you two look incredible…congratulations sergio and carolina 💞
schecoperez: hopefully it’ll be you guys next and we’ll be welcoming max into the family 🥺
maxverstappen1: @/schecoperez is this you saying you want to be brothers in law??? 🥹
schecoperez: @/maxverstappen1: let’s not get too ahead of ourselves now…
landonorris: @/schecoperez I agree, hurry up and put a ring on it verstappen 😂
username38: I can’t get over how adorable the two of you are together 😭
landonorris: who knew you two scrubbed up so well!?
ynperez: @/landonorris we just hide it well 😇
username39: is this extended invite sergio finally accepting of max!?
estebanocon: I’ve never heard a sister of the groom speech before, but you really set quite the high standard 😂
username40: can’t wait for these three to keep annoying each other forever 😂
danielricciardo: damn yn idk what you’ve done to max but he’s never looked hotter 🔥
ynperez: @/danielricciardo careful otherwise people might think it’s you two who are dating…
username41: this feels like a competition to pick which is the cuter couple…
oscarpiastri: looks like you guys all had the most magical day 🥂
username42: you know I secretly think sergio is thrilled that they’re together, he just hides it well 😂
maxverstappen1: feeling pretty lucky to have the most beautiful date in the world, my stunning girl 💞
ynusername: @/maxverstappen1 it’s easy to look good with you by my side 🥺
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗
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kyosopp · 5 months ago
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❝  p1harmony as you bestfriends (them crushing on you) !!  ❞
warnings !! p1h being haters, intak lowkey out to get you, jiung indoctrinating you, soul being too cute for his own good, jongseob being head over heels ngl.
         ━━━━❰・❉・❱━━━━
❪  ❥ .   yoon keeho,  윤기호  ❫
you and keeho became friends pretty early on in your teen years. the two of you initially met when keeho auditioned for fnc, you were there supporting your friend who was auditioning for the company and the two of you instantly clicked.
keeho always has something to say. this guy is not one for censorship over his personality, especially around you.
will say whatever he wants around you, even to your face. if it needs to he said, it will be said.
keeho introduced you to the boys after a couple weeks of their debut preparations, whilst himself and soul are like father and son, you also had a little attachment.
jongseob immediately cuddled up to you upon realising he wouldn’t get teased by you as heavily as he would with the others.
commence the crush allegations on seobie.
keeho is pretty protective, not necessarily overprotective but when it comes to you he will want his arms intertwined with yours in crowded areas (if you want) or for you to walk in front of him so he can see you.
he will send you selfies asking if he looks good and which ones he should post for fans on instagram.
older people think the two of you are dating.
keeho will not hesitate to tease you, or poke fun at you. he’s always judging you when you do something stupid but will he the first to shower you with compliments when you succeed or impress him.
❪  ❥ .   choi taeyang,  최태양  ❫
king of bullying his friends
will not hesitate to randomly push you into people you don’t know forcing you to profusely apologise while he laughs and runs off, puts you on the spot in front of food venders
if you even mutter that you think someone is attractive you better watch your back because taeyang is ruining any chance you have with them.
with that being said, he is insanely overprotective of you.
unlike keeho, taeyang doesn’t give you a choice on whether or not he’s holding your arm or not. he’ll randomly grab your wrist and pull you through crowded areas and hold your arm throughout the night.
when he’s not feeling evil and he actually wants to make memories you wont have to cover your face for during the retelling he’s the sweetest man alive.
randomly does things for you, gets you new bottles of water when he notices you’re done.
of course he’s sprinkled in loving insults (just the theo way)
❪  ❥ .   choi jiung,  최지웅  ❫
he treats you like you’re his favourite person in the world, which you probably are because you’re kind of the only person outside of the members he talks to daily.
he likes to paint your nails for you. occasionally complains about you getting your nails done professionally when he’s literally always in your shadow.
and just because you’re his favourite person doesn’t mean he’s not gonna be teasing you.
he will purposely indoctrinate you into listening to his music taste.
randomly clings to you then shoves you off him because he’a suddenly icked out by human interaction.
probably doesn’t want the boys to meet you too often because he’s worried you’ll like them more and he’ll be forgotten.
then he realises you’re everyones second jongseob so he has nothing to worry about.
❪  ❥ .   hwang intak,  황인탁  ❫
he’ll randomly talk to you about his celebrity crushes when you’re focusing on something but if you ever opened your mouth about mr. big matthew he’ll tell you to stop drooling over a man.
i mean, bm or not, don’t go drooling over a MAN.
he’s kinda icked out by the fact you’re into men. (ngl i see intak as a man hater, because it makes men mad)
he gets really excited when your plans work out together.
will randomly grab your hand and drag you down the street ignoring your pleas for him to slow down.
if this man gets a hold of a shopping cart he’s forcing you into it and pushing you down a hill.
no one knows if he likes you or wants you dead.
youll get a rare compliment from him when he’s feeling nice.
you bring his inner child out.
❪  ❥ .   haku shota,  白翔太  ❫
you met shota through jongseob after p1h’s debut, and for awhile seob refused to give you shota’s phone number and vice versa.
jongseob was tryna save you from the pain of tryna figure out his emojis
theo gave it to you to see how you’d survive.
you became shota’s best friend because you were able to figure out his communication will only slight help from him.
he’ll randomly speak to you in broken english or fluent japanese knowing you’re either confused on what he said or why he changed languages
stares at you in silence for no reason
enjoys getting to be silent and himself around you.
he likes when you ramble on about stuff and he gets to listen to you talk. he’s talked to jongseob about his liking towards your voice.
he’s the only nice one ngl.
❪  ❥ .   kim jongseob,  김종섭  ❫
being seobie’s best friend means that you’re obligated (by law) to play shooter games with him, if he’s too lazy to scavange around for his phone he will grab yours.
purely to play a shooter game he downloaded two weeks ago.
he makes cute usernames for you and gets you to high levels just because he can
(half of your users are higher prestige than his own)
you are like two peas in a pod, always going out to eat together, shopping together, when he’s making music you’re there helping, you dance together, watch the same shoes.
best friends with seobie means everything is done together
if either of you watch a show alone it’s being rewatched together.
randomly shows you affection, random hugs, holding your pinky, fixing your jewery when they’re not straight.
he’s made countless songs for you.
@ kyosopp | do not plagiarise, copy or brand my work as your own
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therealcocoshady · 7 months ago
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Hi coco , I don’t know if your still doing requests if not juts by past this .
Fem reader x Marshall
Reader is some sort of celebrity and her and Marshall’s sex tape gets leaked
SECRETS OUT - ONE SHOT
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Eminem x Celebrity Reader
Author’s note : Thank you so much for your request. I Hope you like it ❤️. I thoroughly enjoyed writing one shots and HCs so if you have requests, feel free to send them to me in my Ask.
Synopsis : You’re a prominent influencer, having a secret relationship with Em for years. None of you intend on making it public… until your sextape gets leaked.
When you started dating Marshall, the two of you had a serious talk about how important it was to him that your relationship remained private. He knew that you shared a lot of your life online - hell, it was kind of your job as an influencer - and respected it, but he was adamant about not being featured on your social media accounts and YouTube channel. You respected his wish. To be honest, you were a little relieved : your last relationship had ended because of public scrutiny and you didn’t want history to repeat itself. Especially since the person you were dating was a megastar. No offense to your ex, who was still a very successful influencer, but next to Marshall Mathers, he was chopped liver. If publicly dating someone with ten million YouTube followers was hard, you couldn’t imagine how it would be if everyone knew you were dating Eminem.
You actually did a good job at keeping your followers and his fans in the dark about your relationship. To everyone, the both of you were single and, even though they were rumours about the two of you dating other public figures, you had never been linked together. No one expected you, a twenty-something fashion and beauty influencer to date Eminem. From the looks of it, you didn’t have much in common and didn’t run in the same circles.
So your relationship flew under the radar for years and you even managed to get married without the public knowing. You had the most beautiful wedding, held in a secluded location with only your closest friends, with a lot of logistics and NDAs involved. Everyone joked that you had to be the only influencer who didn’t share the most important day of their life on social media. Especially when the wedding was so insta-worthy. A few years ago, you would have been a little bummed about it, but being with Marshall kept you grounded and reminded you that not everything was meant to be shared online. If anything, the secrecy of your wedding and the « no phones or camera allowed » rule allowed everyone to enjoy the moment instead of focusing on filming it or snapping pictures of their plates or outfit. That didn’t mean there were no pictures taken though. The only person who immortalised the wedding was the photographer and, though guests were sent the pictures, they were asked not to share, and everyone respected your wishes.
Just because the two of you didn’t share pictures online didn’t mean you didn’t take plenty. In fact, your phones were full of cute selfies of the two of you. At the beginning of your relationship, he often made fun of your habit to try and immortalise moments, but he ended up getting into it. When the two of you met, he was still using an old BlackBerry and took the crappiest selfies, but you managed to turn him into the perfect Instagram husband. In fact, he was the one who helped you do your daily outfit posts and he was more than decent at telling you how you should pose. And if he was a bit judgy of influencers at first, he had come to understand your line of work and your love of fashion. He was extremely supportive of every thing you did and his eyes were gleaming with adoration when he was watching you film your videos, though he still liked to tease you.
One evening, during your honeymoon, you found him filming himself in the mirror as you walked out of the bathroom in your finest, sluttiest lingerie.
- What are you doing ? You giggled.
- Immortalising the outfit. So, it’s simple, the boxers are Givenchy, fall collection… care to share yours ? He chuckled as he pointed the phone to you.
- So tonight, I’m wearing a gorgeous Dita Von Teese set, you said as you posed and played along. We have this gorgeous corset, and the panties are amazing, too…
- Turn around and show the back, babe, he instructed. You’re gorgeous.
This became a little game that you played during the whole honeymoon. Each night, Marshall filmed you in your lingerie, under the pretense that he wanted to remember your honeymoon as vividly as possible. This made you laugh and you let him. It started as « innocent » « outfit of the night » videos but, on occasion, you both felt frisky and ended up filming a literal sex tape, or rather a series of them. Nothing especially elaborate, just one of you holding the phone while doing the deed, just for laughs. You didn’t even watch them after or think about it. It was really just the two of you clowning around, making fun of your own IG account and enjoying your honeymoon. Once you got back home, you didn’t keep it going and eventually came to forget there were videos of you and Marshall having sex on his phone. Until the videos were leaked, that is.
You had been married for about six months and enjoyed your weekly brunch with Marshall’s daughters when they suddenly went silent, after Stevie showed her sisters something on her phone.
- Oh my God, I’m going to puke, Stevie said.
- Girls, no phone at the table, Marshall groaned.
- Have you guys… seen the news ? Hailie asked.
- What news ? You asked back, a tad confused.
- The Pistons headline, Alaina said.
- What’s wrong with the team ? Marshall asked with a raised eyebrow.
The girls frowned and stayed silent for a second before handing the phone to the two of you. There was an article about you and Marshall, soberly titled : « Detroit’s ultimate Piston : Eminem sextape leaked (featuring influencer Y/N ». The headline was enough to make you want to die. The article wasn’t much better. It commented on the videos and showed a few screenshots of tweets reacting to the leak such as « Bro can’t take a decent selfie but you can trust him to point the camera at his dick correctly 👀 » or « Damn. He’s 51 but Y/N’s the one who’s gonna need hip replacement surgery with these trusts 💀». You and Marshall stared at each other while the girls were looking at you. You felt humiliated. Not only were the videos leaked online, you were confronted by your step-daughters - though they were old enough to be your sisters - about it. You looked down, absolutely mortified.
- Don’t watch these, Marshall told his daughters.
- Like we’d want to see that, Stevie pointed out.
- Really, guys, a sextape ? Alaina asked. Dad, you’re 51 !
- I’m going to be sick, you said as you left the table and headed to your room.
You heard Marshall calling your name but there was absolutely no way you could face anyone right now. Once you were alone, you anxiously checked your phone. Of course, everyone was in a frenzy. Your manager was texting you and your social media accounts were flooded. Both in the comments and your DMs, people were going crazy and talking about the videos. You already had a huge following, but it was something else entirely. You immediately called your manager, who was beyond pissed. Apparently, some brands you collaborated threatened to sever their ties with you. Of course, you getting rammed on video didn’t really fit in with your usual good girl image and it wouldn’t be a good look for them. Now, not only were you ashamed but you were also terrified. You had worked too hard for your career to crumble that easily.
- What should I do ? You anxiously asked.
- For now, nothing, she said. I’m going to consult with a few people to see what we can do for damage control. Though if I were you I’d get ready to film an apology video.
- I didn’t do anything wrong, you pointed out. These videos were not meant to be shared.
- You know how it is, Y/N. I’ll get back to you ASAP.
- Thanks, you said sheepishly. Talk to you soon.
When you hung up, you couldn’t resist the temptation to go and check other articles. Obviously, news traveled fast and you were now a trending subject. Marshall being the more famous of the two of you, his name was on every headline but, from the looks of it, you were the one whose reputation was suffering the most. While everybody seemed to praise his performance - and impressive physique - you were deemed a slut by the Internet. Even worse, some people were already making memes with your face and some rappers beefing with Marshall were reposting them. You had always been a « glass half-full » type of person but you literally wanted to die. In a flash, it seemed like you could kiss your career and reputation goodbye.
After about an hour, Marshall joined you in the bedroom and took you in his arms while you were sobbing.
- Hey, he said sheepishly.
- I-I’m sorry, you said. But I can’t go and face your daughters. I just can’t. I can’t face anyone right now, I-I…
- It’s fine, he replied before kissing your forehead. I sent them home.
- Im sorry, you said. I know how much family brunch means to you…
- As it turns out, having your kids lecture you about your leaked sextape isn’t as fun as people make it out to be, he said sarcastically.
You couldn’t help but chortle. Even in this type of dramatic situations, you could always count on Marshall’s dry humor. He placed another kiss on your forehead and wiped your tears with his thumbs.
- We’ll be fine, he said reassuringly. Don’t worry, babe.
- Why aren’t you freaking out ? You asked. You should be freaking out.
- Oh, I’m freaking out, he said. I mean, I’m livid. But on a practical level, I know people will forget about it eventually, you know.
- Easy for you to say, you pointed out. The Internet is raving about the size of your dick and commenting about how in shape you are for an older dude… meanwhile, people are calling me a slut.
- You’re not a slut, he said as he rolled his eyes.
- Tell that to the thousand of people calling me a rapper groupie or whatever that is, you groaned.
- Doesn’t matter, he shrugged. We both know that’s not true. You’re not a groupie, you’re my wife.
- Well I’m about to be a stay at home wife, you said with tears in your eyes. I had my agent on the phone and sponsors are already breaking contracts… I-I’m losing everything, Marshall…
The tears started streaming down again. Mentioning the situation out loud was upsetting, it only meant it was real. You were really on the verge of losing everything. Your husband knew better than anyone how much your career meant to you, the work you put in and everything you had invested to be successful. To you, it wasn’t just a job : it was your dream. You had always tried your best to have a pristine reputation as an influencer and stay out of drama but now, people were looking down on you and calling you names. And you dreaded the perspective of doing an apology video. It was humiliating. In most recent years, you had focused your content on beauty and fashion instead of your private life but now, it was up for public consumption. Marshall held you tight as you told him about the comments you received and how sad you were about losing collaborations you were looking forward to.
- You don’t need these people’s money, he said.
- You know it’s not a matter of money, you replied curtly. It’s never only been about money. It’s more than that.
- I know, he said. But look, these videos were stolen from us. And if these brands who put that much effort into building a so-called relationship with you drop you easily, it’s not worth it. They should be sending you flowers and publicly supporting you.
- You know that’s not how it works, you sighed.
- All I’m saying is that it’s unfair, he said. And I’m sorry you’re going through this. But I know you. You’re strong and you’re resilient. And your followers love you. You’re not going to lose your career over this.
- I’ll do my best, you shrugged. My agency wants me to film an apology video.
- Are they serious ? He groaned. You don’t have to apologise for shit. These videos were fucking stolen, Y/N !!!
He was clearly mad. Funnily enough, he seemed more angry over the unfairness of the situation than the fact that everyone could see him having sex on video. But then again, it probably had something to do with his reputation being pretty intact. Sure, that would probably earn him a few lines in diss tracks people might be tempted to put out, but there wasn’t much to be ashamed of, as far as he was concerned. First of all, the videos clearly made a good job of shutting down rumours about his size, and he still came across as someone who had sex. On the other hand, you were more visible on the videos and earning a reputation of an easy and slutty influencer, hungry for fame. Typical double standard. You cursed whoever had managed to steal these videos. And deep down, you were mad that they had been so easily stolen.
- Why were they stolen in the first place ? You groaned.
- What ? He asked. You know how it is… people’s phones get hacked all the fucking time. Whoever did that was probably hoping to get their hands on new music. Joke’s on them, though. We only function with CDs to avoid this type of leaks.
- Joke’s on them ?! You almost yelled. The joke is on me !!! I couldn’t care less about your CDs. No offense but I’d rather have your album leaked than my career ruined, Marshall !!!
- Sorry, he said as he nervously scratched his beard. Poor choice of word. Of course it’s worse. What I mean is… hacks happen all the time. Every month there’s a new story about a celebrity’s phone or computer or cloud being hacked.
- And I’m usually over here, making fun about people who don’t know how to protect their data, you said as you rolled your eyes. The most basic thing to do is to at least put this type of photos in a folder that requires double authentication.
- Double what ?
He looked at you with big eyes. Of course, he had no idea what you were talking about. « That’s what you get for marrying a dummy when it comes to technology », you thought. You didn’t want to get mad at him, but you were pissed. You rolled your eyes at him and let your head fall on the pillow.
- I have to go and call Paul, he said. We’re both going to have to do damage control. But we’ll be fine, I promise you.
- Mmmmh, you groaned.
- I’ll do my best to find whoever did that and sue their ass, he assured you. And whoever shares these videos, too. When we got married, I swore I would protect you and you best believe I’m making good on that.
- Thanks, you said sheepishly.
The following couple of days were especially tough. News had obviously traveled fast and everyone in your life knew about the videos. You thought facing Hailie, Alaina and Stevie was hard, but FaceTiming with your parents was even harder. You could tell they were disappointed, and mostly worried for you. Both of your management teams were trying to find the best way to get through it. Unfortunately, crisis management wasn’t the same for a rapper as it was for an influencer. Marshall’s team advised him to stay silent while yours was almost begging you to address the elephant in the room, preferably with your husband, who was an ogre about it.
- I’m not appearing in your damn apology video, he groaned. It’s stupid enough that you have to do one of these.
- I have to do what’s best for my career, you pleaded.
- You always said these videos were disingenuous, he pointed out.
- Well, yes, but what am I going to do ? You groaned. Disappear and kiss my career goodbye ? And I’m not you, Marshall. I can’t just ignore it and go back to posting videos as if nothing happened.
He hummed and you kept talking about it, trying to come up with a solution. You weren’t thrilled about the idea of addressing the situation and he was right : you had nothing to apologise for. And he was fully against the idea of standing next to you like a First Lady while you filmed something so silly. Of course, it turned into an argument. There was only so much pressure you could take. And you knew Marshall was doing his best and keeping in touch with his lawyers, but you were mad that he wouldn’t support you publicly.
- I’m asking you to stand next to me for a damn video, that’s all, you sighed. I’m not asking for the moon, here. You don’t even have to say anything.
- Then what’s the point in me being here at all ? He shrugged. We agreed that I would be kept out of your content, Y/N. That was clear from the start.
- Because everyone thinks I’m a whore ! You yelled. I was fine with people not knowing about us, but I am not fine with people calling me a rapper whore. And I am not fine with my husband not supporting me. You said we were a team ! You promised to care for me and protect me for the rest of our lives. Or were these vows just words to you ?!?!
You knew he would be pissed off by your words. He had always made it clear that his vows were absolutely serious and solemn. And you knew for a fact that he had put a lot of heart and thought into writing them. He didn’t say anything, just sighed and left the room. Obviously, you both needed to take time off because this escalated into an argument. You groaned and stayed in the bedroom, which you had barely left since the videos had leaked.
A couple of hours later, you went downstairs and found Marshall watching some boxing match on TV.
- Hey, you said sheepishly.
- Hey, he simply said.
- Look, I’m sorry, I…, you began.
- Don’t sweat it, he shrugged as he gestured for you to come sit on his lap.
You sat on him and watched with him in silence, enjoying the sensation of his arms wrapped around your waist. When the match ended, he turned off TV and smiled at you.
- I took care of things, he said.
- You did ? You asked.
- I did, he confirmed. You don’t need to film that stupid video.
- What did you do ? You asked with a raised eyebrow.
He seemed pretty sure of himself, proud even, and you tried hard not to show it, but you were still a bit doubtful.
- Check Instagram, he simply said as he handed you your phone.
You nervously checked your account. You were tagged in thousands of new posts. Only these weren’t posts of the sex videos. Your account was flooded with pictures of your wedding, posted by your friends and reposted by tons of fan accounts. Your closest influencer friends had posted the beautiful pictures of them with you at the wedding. Marshall’s friends had done the same : 50, Dre, Porter, Royce… everyone was posting about your nuptials. The most beautiful shot was the one shared by Marshall on his account : a gorgeous black and white shot of the two of you after the reception, holding hands and staring at the fireworks, captioned : « For better & for worse. Happy 6 months anniversary. ». Everyone was going absolutely crazy in the comments, not failing to show their surprise and mentioning that he was now following one account : yours. You looked at him, almost crying and took him in your arms.
- Oh my God, you said. I can’t believe you did this.
- Called in a few favors and asked our friends to post the wedding pictures, he said with a smile. I figured the Internet would focus on these rather than the videos. So far it seems to be working…
- You didn’t have to, you said emotionally. I know you wanted to keep the wedding a secret.
- I also wanted to keep our sex life secret, he chuckled. But I care more about you and supporting you. Now, everyone knows I have your back. Until death do us part. And if anyone dares come for you, I will end them. I promise.
- I love you, you said emotionally.
- I love you too, he replied before kissing you. I’m sorry I was grumpy about the whole thing. You were right, these vows were never meant to be just words. I want to put them in action.
You kissed him passionately and you both took a minute to enjoy the posts everyone made about your wedding, reminiscing about that special day.
- I’m happy I don’t have to make that stupid apology video, you confessed.
- Me too, he chuckled. I did make an apology though.
- You did ? You asked in surprise.
He showed you his IG story. A black screen with simple text - in true influencer fashion : « I want to take a minute to apologize about the videos that have been leaked. I am sorry if anyone was confused. They were misleading and I want to state that the boxers were actually not Givenchy but Calvin Klein. Sorry for the confusion. 👀». You chortled and kissed him.
- What ? That was the only thing worth an apology, he pointed out with a smile.
- You’re such a troll, you said as you playfully rolled your eyes.
You spent the following days in bliss, showered with love from both your followers and his fans. Everyone was going crazy about your wedding and, even though there were still mentions of the sextape, most of the attention was focused on your relationship. Both of your management teams were also happy to put the incident behind them, though now they had to deal with plenty of interview requests. However, you agreed that even though your secret was out, nothing would really change. You slowly got back to business. Though nothing didn’t really change for Marshall - who was always in hermit mode in the studio - you had a lot of new followers and tons of collaboration requests. The sponsors who had been quick to drop you even came back and attempted to suck up to you, though you absolutely refused to work with them again. You were in your home office, reviewing partnership requests when you came across the biggest offer of your career : none other than Calvin Klein wanted you to be the new face of their underwear campaign, offering you a shit ton of money. It was the biggest opportunity you had ever received but you were a bit nervous when you mentioned it to your husband.
- What do you think ? You asked after you brought it up to him.
- I think we’ve established that you look good in underwear, he grinned.
- Yes but that would be banking on our sextape, our relationship… would it be ok with you ? You asked.
- I’ll cut you a deal : I’m ok with you doing that campaign if you’re ok with me using your moans as ad libs, he said with a smirk.
- You can’t be serious, you giggled as you rolled your eyes.
- What ? He chuckled. We’re partner in life, we might as well be business partners.
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solxamber · 2 months ago
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Hello! I saw your fic(?) On the reader being similar to the white rabbit!
So I had a similar idea but with absolem the caterpillar from Alice in wonderland. With heartslabyul, octavinelle and pomefiore (added on maybe chenya ?). Basically the reader is a 2nd year and is a very cocky person when it comes to things like subjects they get high scores in along with having bad anger issues? This is just an idea I have at the top of my head 😅 I also don't make requests often if that was clear lol.
Thank you if reading my request ! :)
It's been so long since I read Alice in Wonderland but I hope this is what you wanted <3
Absolem! Reader with Heartslabyul, Octavinelle and Pomefiore + Che'nya
Rest of the characters: here
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Riddle Rosehearts
Riddle Rosehearts had no idea how to handle you. On one hand, you were technically a model student—when you weren’t terrorizing everyone with your arrogance, that is. On the other hand, your cocky attitude made his eye twitch like he was seconds away from writing up a whole new rule just for your ego.
“You may have gotten the highest score in Alchemy,” Riddle said stiffly, his hands clenched behind his back like he was bracing himself for an incoming tidal wave of sass, “but that does not excuse you from following protocol during experiments!"
You leaned back in your chair, all smug grin and half-lidded eyes. “Oh, Riddle, Riddle, Riddle. If I followed your ‘protocol,’ we’d still be stuck trying to figure out how to transmute lead into potatoes.”
His face flushed as red as a rose. “That is not the point!”
“I’m just saying,” you replied with a shrug, “your rules are cute, but some of us prefer actual results.”
There was a long, tension-filled silence. Then, Riddle’s lips twitched, and you could almost hear his brain rewriting Rule 392: No Sassing The Dorm Leader.
Trey Clover
If Trey had a talent, it was the ability to defuse a situation with nothing more than a laid-back smile and a soft-spoken word or two. But when it came to your outbursts, even Trey occasionally had to roll up his sleeves.
“You’re getting pretty fired up over here, huh?” Trey said, folding his arms and giving you that calm, big-brother smile.
You narrowed your eyes. “They just don’t get it, Trey. If they’d actually listen to me, we’d be done with these stupid group projects in half the time.”
Trey hummed, still as placid as ever. “Maybe. Or maybe they just don’t appreciate being called ‘incompetent cabbage heads’ every time they mess up.”
You raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t call them that this time.”
“Oh, my mistake. That was last week.” Trey chuckled, grabbing a cupcake from a tray. “Anyway, maybe you should try a new approach. Like, I don’t know... baking?”
You squinted at him suspiciously. “Is this another one of your ‘therapy via baked goods’ attempts? Because the last time I tried, Cater put the whole thing on Magicam, and I’m still seeing memes about ‘exploding tarts.’”
Trey just smiled knowingly. “Everyone’s gotta start somewhere.”
Cater Diamond
“#MoodSwings, am I right?”
Cater had this incredible (and incredibly annoying) ability to pop up just when you were about to lose it. Today was no different. You were fuming over some insignificant thing someone said in class, and right when you were about to explode, there he was, phone at the ready.
“I swear, if you tag me in another one of your posts—” you started, but he was already snapping pics, duck-lip selfie style.
“Whoa, chill, bestie! It’s not my fault you’ve got that ‘rage extrodinaire’ aesthetic. The followers eat it up. Seriously, you should start a channel. #CaterToYourAnger.”
You glared. “I’d start with a video called ‘How to Get Away with Smashing Cater’s Phone.’”
Cater grinned, absolutely unfazed. “Aww, love you too, cupcake. Just think of all the likes we’d get!”
Ace Trappola
Ace? Oh, Ace lived to rile you up. He thrived on it like a plant soaking in the sun.
“So,” he said, leaning back against the wall with a smug grin, “I heard you were bragging about your Potions grade again. Shocking.”
You glared daggers at him. “I don’t have to brag. The results speak for themselves. Unlike your grades, which are probably hiding in the shadow of your last failed test.”
“Oof, that’s cold. You sure you’re not secretly studying Ice Magic?” Ace shot back, raising an eyebrow. “You know, all that boasting is just you overcompensating for something. Like, maybe you’re secretly terrible at everything else?”
Your temper flared instantly, and you stepped closer, ready to unleash your wrath. “Say that again, and I’ll show you what happens when—”
“Oh, hold on—Deuce! Hey, Deuce!” Ace shouted, and before you could lay into him, Deuce was running over, looking confused and ready to brawl for no reason.
“Are we fighting? We’re fighting, right?” Deuce asked, fists already up.
You sighed, rubbing your temples. “Deuce, no one’s fighting.”
“Yet,” Ace muttered with a wink, and you had to resist the urge to scream.
Deuce Spade
Deuce tried. He really did. But no matter how hard he tried to match your fiery personality, he just couldn’t seem to get it quite right.
“You know, I’ve been practicing too,” Deuce said one day, puffing out his chest like he was about to impress you. “I’m getting better at Transfiguration!”
You blinked. “Really? Didn’t you turn someone’s textbook into a chicken by accident last week?”
Deuce’s face turned red. “I-It wasn’t a chicken! It was... okay, maybe it was a chicken, but I’m improving!”
“Sure you are,” you teased, crossing your arms. “I bet your next experiment will turn the whole dorm into a petting zoo.”
Deuce stared at you for a moment, clearly weighing his options. “...That would actually be kinda cool.”
You facepalmed. “Deuce, please.”
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Azul Ashengrotto
Azul wasn’t intimidated by your cockiness. No, in fact, he saw it as something to be... monetized. Because why not take that overblown confidence of yours and turn it into something profitable for the Mostro Lounge?
“You could be quite the business partner,” Azul remarked, smiling slyly from across his desk. “With your top grades and undeniable talent, I’m sure students would pay handsomely for tutoring sessions.”
You narrowed your eyes at him. “What’s the catch?”
Azul feigned innocence. “Catch? Why, there’s no catch at all. Just a little... arrangement. I take a modest percentage of the profits, and in return, you gain access to the resources of the Mostro Lounge. Think of it as... a mutually beneficial partnership.”
You tilted your head. “So basically, I do all the work, and you skim off the top?”
Azul’s grin widened. “A shrewd observation, but I prefer the term strategic partnership.”
Jade Leech
Jade, on the other hand, was a master of subtlety. He didn’t confront you head-on like the others did. No, Jade had this unnerving way of quietly watching you, like a predator biding its time.
“Your temper is quite fascinating,” Jade remarked one day, his eerie smile never faltering.
You crossed your arms defensively. “Fascinating how?"
“Oh, just the way it flares up so quickly. It’s almost... predictable.” He tilted his head slightly. “I wonder, how well do you control it in dangerous situations?”
“Why, are you planning to test me or something?” you asked warily, already regretting the question.
Jade chuckled softly. “Oh no, nothing of the sort. I’m merely... observing. You’re quite the specimen, after all.”
You shuddered. “Please stop talking like I’m some kind of lab rat.”
Floyd Leech
Floyd, on the other hand, lived to push your buttons. He loved it when you lost your cool because it meant you were interesting. And Floyd? He thrived on interesting.
“Oi, Shrimpy!” Floyd’s voice echoed across the lounge as he slung an arm around your shoulders. “Heard you got top marks again. Big shot, huh?”
You side-eyed him. “Don’t call me Shrimpy.”
“Awww, but I like it!” he whined, pouting dramatically. “You get all mad when I do it. It’s fun! Do it again! Get mad!”
You groaned. “Why are you like this?”
Floyd grinned, his sharp teeth gleaming. “Why not? It’s more fun to watch you blow a gasket. Maybe I’ll squeeze ya real good next time you freak out.”
You shook him off. “No thanks, I’d rather not have my ribs crushed.”
“Awww, but that’s the best part!”
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Vil Schoenheit
Vil couldn’t stand your cocky attitude. Mostly because he couldn’t stand anything that was less than perfection—and in his eyes, you were far from it.
“Such arrogance,” Vil remarked, inspecting his reflection in a compact mirror as you ranted about how no one appreciated your brilliance. “It’s one thing to be talented, but it’s another thing entirely to lack grace.”
You rolled your eyes. “Oh, please. Like you’ve never been confident in your own abilities.”
Vil snapped the compact shut, finally looking at you with a sharp, withering gaze. “Confidence is one thing. Vulgarity is is another.” He raised an eyebrow, his perfect lips curving in a condescending smile. “And darling, you’re teetering dangerously close to the latter.”
You huffed, crossing your arms. “I’m just saying, if everyone else could keep up with me, maybe I wouldn’t have to be this way.”
Vil waved a hand dismissively. “Keep up with you? I highly doubt that. There’s a fine line between confidence and crudeness, and you’ve trampled right over it in those worn-out boots of yours.”
You glanced down at your boots, scowling. “Hey! My boots are perfectly fine!”
Vil gave you a once-over, a pitying sigh slipping from his lips. “I could recommend a stylist, but I doubt even the best could save you from that attitude of yours."
Rook Hunt
If there was anyone who found your fiery personality endlessly amusing, it was Rook. The man seemed to delight in your temper tantrums, treating them like some kind of grand performance.
“Oh, what a magnifique display of passion!” Rook exclaimed one afternoon, after you’d shouted at some poor first-year for knocking into you. “Your fire burns so brightly, it is a wonder you do not set the very air ablaze!”
You glared at him, still fuming. “I’m not trying to entertain you, Rook.”
“But you do! Oh, you do!” Rook clapped his hands together, his eyes shining with admiration. “To witness such raw emotion—it is truly a gift. You are like a tempest, sweeping all in your path.”
“Pretty sure that’s just a fancy way of saying I’m a walking disaster.”
“Non, non, non!” Rook laughed, shaking his head. “You are a force of nature, one that cannot be tamed! To tame such a spirit would be a crime against beauty itself!”
You blinked at him, unsure whether to be flattered or concerned. “Okay, sure. Whatever makes you happy, Rook.”
Epel Felmier
Epel had mixed feelings about you. On one hand, he admired your guts—your temper was something to be feared, and Epel respected that. On the other hand, you were annoying.
“You know, just ‘cause you’re good at Magic History doesn’t mean you gotta rub it in everyone’s face,” Epel grumbled one day after you’d corrected him in class. “Ain’t nobody here tryin’ to hear that.”
You leaned against the desk, a smug grin on your face. “It’s not my fault you can’t keep up. Maybe if you spent more time studying and less time trying to look tough, you’d have better grades.”
Epel’s face turned red. “I am tough! And if you say somethin’ like that again, I’ll—”
“You’ll what?” You raised an eyebrow, daring him to continue.
Epel gritted his teeth, fists clenched at his sides. “I’ll... I’ll... kick your butt in PE next time!”
You snorted. “Sure, Epel. Let me know how that goes.”
He muttered something under his breath, probably swearing revenge in the form of some country-style wrestling move, but you were already too busy planning your next academic triumph to care.
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Che'nya
Of course, Che’nya didn’t mind your attitude at all. In fact, he found it downright entertaining. He’d pop up at the most inconvenient moments, grinning that mischievous grin of his and waiting for you to lose your cool.
“Nyah~ Why so serious, Y/N?” Che’nya’s voice floated down from seemingly nowhere. “All that steam comin’ outta your ears can’t be good for your health.”
You looked up, scowling as you spotted him lounging in a tree, that trademark grin never leaving his face. “What do you want, Che’nya?”
He tilted his head, blinking innocently. “Just wonderin’ if you were plannin’ to blow a gasket today. I’ve got a front-row seat!"
“Get down here before I make you,” you snapped.
“Oooh, feisty! You know, it’s a good thing you’re not in Wonderland.” He chuckled, disappearing and reappearing right beside you. “You’d fit right in with all the wild tempers down there.”
You rolled your eyes. “And you’d fit right in with the pests.”
Che’nya laughed, not the least bit offended. “Nyah~ You say the sweetest things! See ya around, Hothead.”
And with that, he disappeared again, leaving you to stew in your own frustration. Typical Che’nya.
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Masterlist
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hannieoftheyear · 10 months ago
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sexting with Mingyu
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the one where you accidentally send Mingyu – someone who you do not like – a nude.
content warnings: smut, sexting, mingyu is an avid emoji user, switch mingyu but more subby at the end (sawrrrry I can’t help it), use of pet names (good boy and baby).
w.c: 2,9k
note: I wanted to post a quick work to get this blog going while I finish some longer things I’m working on ♡ hope you like it and I’m sorry if there are any mistakes
part 2 is posted! find it here
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Your eyes roll when your phone lights up and the text notification pops up.
Kim Mingyu🤢: don’t forget to transfer me the money for Seokmin’s bday 🙏 [11:47 pm.]
The idea of Kim Mingyu of all people handling something as important as a birthday surprise for your best friend irks you.
Of course he was his best friend too. But why on earth did he end up making the plans. And who made you follow his lead. It’s like torture. You don’t want to engage with him in any way.
He was so smug when everyone decided he should be in charge of the surprise party. The decision was between you and him, and you guess people don’t really like your style of planning because it was an unanimous vote. Still, you liked not having to stress so much about it, but having to rely on your sworn enemy makes you shrug.
Okay, maybe sworn enemy it’s an exaggeration. You two just don’t like each other, and that’s fine. Not everyone is always going to like you, and you’re okay with that. The problem is when you can’t avoid said person because you’re in the same fucking friend group.
You two avoid each other if possible. When the whole group hangs out, you try to stay as far away as you can. It’s not like you fight with him, but your exchanges are short and dry, often a little harsh, so you try your best to avoid it to not spoil the mood.
After you transfer him the money, you take a screenshot to send him. It’s not really needed, but you do it just to make sure there’s proof that you transferred the money.
You open his chat and send the last picture on your camera roll without even looking, trying to be done with him the fastest possible.
You: [Picture.] [11:50 pm.]
Locking your phone, you keep working on the assignment your boss asked you to finish by tomorrow. But it gets cut short because not even five minutes later, Mingyu texts you again. You don’t open his chat, but instead, read it through the notification.
Kim Mingyu🤢: didn’t take you as the type to take pics like that 🫣 [11:54 pm.]
You wonder what the hell he’s talking about and why he chose such an annoying emoji.
As you open the chat, your eyes grow wide, and you realize you forgot to check what exactly you were sending Mingyu.
It seems that your screenshot hadn’t fully loaded on the gallery, and you accidentally sent him the previous last photo on your camera roll, which was a mirror selfie of you wearing a new pair of underwear you bought today.
Panic starts to creep in on you, but before doing anything stupid, you breathe in and breathe out, calming yourself to think. Mingyu’s still online, which means he’s probably waiting for your answer.
Instead of admitting it was on accident or showing him any weakness, you decide to play with him a little. He likes to annoy you too, so why not do the same.
You: you never know… I’m full of surprises.
You: why wouldn’t I take a pic if I look pretty? [11:55 pm]
You don’t expect much but his reply comes as soon as you click send.
Kim Mingyu🤢: surprised I definitely am🤔 can’t decide if I like this side of you or not🫢 [11:55 pm.]
You: like I care about your validation [11:56 pm.]
Kim Mingyu🤢: you should.
You: ?
Kim Mingyu🤢: take pics like this I mean😳
Now this is getting interesting.
You: so you think I look pretty? [11:57 pm.]
You wouldn’t lie and say him saying things like this doesn’t make you a little giddy. He’s always so dry with you, you definitely prefer this side of him.
Kim Mingyu🤢: you should send me another one🫣 it’ll help me make up my mind.
You ponder on what’s happening for a solid minute before replying. Is he flirting? Is he teasing you? Will this just be another thing to annoy you in the future?
You: can you stop with those fuckass emojis. [11:58 pm.]
You: I’m not speaking to you if you keep talking like that.
Kim Mingyu🤢: what if I say please?
Now that. Is unexpected. At first it seemed like he wanted to annoy you too, but now he’s almost… begging? How far is he willing to take it? How willing are you?
You: you’re so annoying.
You: I’m trying to work.
Kim Mingyu🤢: all this time we've known each other and I’ve never even seen you in a bikini. [11:59 pm]
Kim Mingyu🤢: what a waste of time.
You: was it worth the wait?
Kim Mingyu🤢: you have no idea.
You: enlighten me then.
Kim Mingyu🤢: oh I don’t think you’re prepared for that.
The conversation is taking a turn you’re not sure if you should take. Exciting you in ways that it shouldn’t.
A chat between the two of you never exceeded a few texts. You are both always so eager to end it as soon as possible, so why does he keep replying? Why do you?
You: what do you want Mingyu? [12:00 am]
Your blatant question seems to take him by surprise because he doesn’t reply right away.
Kim Mingyu🤢: me? You’re the one that sent me a fucking nude at this hour [12:01 am]
He’s right. Are you embarrassing yourself? He’s never gonna let you live after this. But you’re not backing down now.
You: I wasn’t even naked you pervert [12:02 am]
You: and it didn’t seem to matter to you before
You: you liked it didn’t you
Kim Mingyu🤢: never said I didn’t
You: so…
Kim Mingyu🤢: what?
You: are you gonna do something about it?
You’re too curious for your own good. The lines between annoying him and flirting with him are getting more and more blurred every second that passes.
Now it’s your turn to be surprised.
Kim Mingyu🤢: you can’t ask me that [12:03 am]
You: why?
Minutes pass and you see him typing then nothing, then typing again. Your room starts to feel hotter, the expectation getting the best of you and you start to feel a familiar feeling at the base of your stomach.
Kim Mingyu🤢: you should never send a desperate guy something like that at this hour [12:06 am]
You: are you that desperate?
Kim Mingyu🤢: [Picture.]
Kim Mingyu🤢: does that answer your question?
You stare in awe at your phone for what feels like an hour. His hard dick covered by his white boxers threatening to come out fills your screen. Nothing is left to the imagination.
Kim Mingyu🤢: cat got your tongue? [12:08 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: [Picture.]
Kim Mingyu🤢: it’s getting difficult to not touch myself
A second photo fills your screen now. It’s almost in the same position except now his hand is covering his bulge and his red tip is out.
Wetness starts to pool on your underwear, but he doesn’t need to know, yet at least.
You: I never pictured you as such a needy guy. [12:10 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: I’m not ashamed to be who I am🙈
You: even with you hands on your pants you manage to send a fucking emoji wow. [12:11 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: I can send something else
Kim Mingyu🤢: only if you want of course
You straighten yourself, waiting for another photo, but nothing happens. When you move on your seat, you feel just how wet you are. Oh you’re gonna kill him after this.
You: I really hate you you know [12:14 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: aren’t you supposed to be working?😨
You: you’re distracting
Kim Mingyu🤢: oh so you do want this
You: this? [12:15 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: all you have to do is ask
Kim Mingyu🤢: nicely
You: you really gonna make me beg?
Kim Mingyu🤢: want me to show you how horny I am?
Kim Mingyu🤢: you want me to make you feel good.
You: you could never make me feel good. [12:16 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: oh we’ll see about that.
The act you’re putting up won’t last much longer if he keeps up like this. Your right hand creeps down you abdomen. You barely graze your covered cunt, the little relief makes you sigh.
You’re too lost in the little pleasure and don’t realize he sent more texts.
Kim Mingyu🤢: [voice note] [12:18 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: your turn.
Kim Mingyu🤢: I’m dying over here
Kim Mingyu🤢: are you touching yourself? [12:19 am]
You: you’re leaving me no choice. [12:20 am]
You decide to play with him a little and send him a ‘one view only’ photo of your hand inside your panties. The same panties as the first photo you sent.
After you reply, you dare to play his voice note. The faint sound of his hand tugging on his erection and his little grunts are nothing compared to the sigh he lets out at the end. You play with your fingers, circling them around your wet entrance.
Kim Mingyu🤢: you’re so not fair. [12:22 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: I bet you’re so wet right now
Kim Mingyu🤢: I wish you were here so I could touch you properly [12:23 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: my fingers playing with your little cunt like the brat you are
This can’t hurt, right? It’s not like it will happen again, and besides he’s already jerking off to your image. You start circling around your clit, playing with yourself making you squirm.
You: I’m so wet [12:24 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: did i get you all riled up already?
You: don’t flatter yourself
Kim Mingyu🤢: tell me.
Kim Mingyu🤢: show me how wet you are [12:25 am]
You: I could just slide my fingers in
Kim Mingyu🤢: I said show me
You debate if you should actually send him something. You know he’s trustworthy. He’s friends with your best friends after all, but this is something far beyond that.
You: should I? [12:26 am]
You: I could just leave you like this
You: get it done by myself
It could be read a threat, but you want to see how he reacts.
Kim Mingyu🤢: don’t be mean☹️
Kim Mingyu🤢: I won’t show this to anyone [12:27 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: if that worries you
Kim Mingyu🤢: I promise
His sudden kindness surprises you a little.
You’re not sure if you always found Mingyu attractive. Sure he’s really handsome that’s undeniable. Maybe when you first met, you thought he was really hot, but those feelings died down because your relationship wasn’t the best. You had a few fights before you decided it was best for the group to just ignore each other if possible.
This was the first time in years you had a long conversation that didn’t end in a fight, and you like it.
You: I'm not the type to do this you know [12:28 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: I’m not either
You: but I don't want to stop
Kim Mingyu🤢: me neither
Knowing he wants this too just turns you on more. He’s not pushing you to do anything, and you guess that if you tell him to stop, he will. But you have to make sure before you do something.
You: just promise me this is between us [12:30 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: you have my word🤐
You: be serious for one second
Kim Mingyu🤢: you can trust me
Kim Mingyu🤢: I’m serious I won’t show or tell anyone
That is enough to calm you for now. You don’t think about how this will affect your relationship. Seokmin’s birthday is just a few days away, and you’ll have to face Mingyu in front of everyone.
But that doesn’t bother you now as you’re filming what Mingyu so desperately was asking you to.
You angle your phone to show only your lower body on camera. You start the video circling your entrance, gathering as much arousal as possible. After that, you move your fingers closer to the camera to show how wet they are and then slowly insert two fingers in your hole. You end the video after a little moan escapes your lips
You: for being such a good boy [12:35 am]
You: [video]
You don’t stop fingering yourself and close your eyes, imagining it’s Mingyu’s hand and not yours. His thick fingers would stretch you more than yours ever could. A few slow strokes are enough to make you squirm. And you remember to open your eyes and see you got more texts from Mingyu.
Kim Mingyu🤢: holy fuck [12:37 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: you’re dripping
Kim Mingyu🤢: I should be there right now
Kim Mingyu🤢: show you what my mouth could do
Kim Mingyu🤢: could eat you out for hours
Kim Mingyu🤢: fuck you’re making me so hard [12:38 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: [picture]
He had taken his boxers off and was now fully naked. His hand could barely wrap around his fully hard dick. The tip is pinkish red and leaking precum already.
You: fuck you’re so big [12:39 am]
You: I don’t think it could fit inside me
Kim Mingyu🤢: I’ll make it fit
You: how?
Kim Mingyu🤢: I'd make you cum so much that I'd slide right in
You: are you touching yourself?
Kim Mingyu🤢: god how I wish this was you instead of my hand
You close your eyes again. Imagining Mingyu on top of you as you finger yourself harder, as deep as you possibly can. Wet sounds and moans fill your room as you get closer and closer.
Kim Mingyu🤢: I’m so close it’s embarrassing [12:41 am]
You: I am too
Kim Mingyu🤢: show me?🥺
The giggle you let out is almost instantaneous. His emojis are annoyingly cute.
You take a similar video as before, but don’t hold back the moans. Your strokes are slow to show on camera how deep you’re getting. The orgasm is so close that you can taste it, but you stop, edging yourself.
You: because you asked so nicely [12:43 am]
You: [video.]
You: now you
You wait a few minutes, stroking you clit lightly to not lose the orgasm but not quickly enough to stimulate much.
The torture doesn’t last long because a video appears in your chat along with more texts.
Kim Mingyu🤢: holy shit [12:44 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: you’re so hot
Kim Mingyu🤢: god that should be my hand
Kim Mingyu🤢: [video] [12:45 pm]
As soon as you press play you’re welcomed by Mingyu’s delicious moans. His cock is shiny with pre cum all over it, now angry red. He moans at every pump and you feel yourself getting wetter.
Unexpectedly, he also speaks: “I’m so close" his voice is hoarse and deep like you’ve never heard before, “I wish this was your hand, shit only imagining makes me almost cum" and finally, “please… tell me I can cum… can I cum?”
You never expected the big buff Kim Mingyu to be so needy, it just makes you hornier if that’s even possible.
You: you’re so needy baby [12:47 am]
You: I’m close too
You: been edging myself waiting for you
Kim Mingyu🤢: shit baby don’t say stuff like that [12:48 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: im about to burst
You: want to cum big boy?
Kim Mingyu🤢: pleeasee
You: look who’s begging now
Kim Mingyu🤢: don’t play with me right now
Kim Mingyu🤢: you’re just as desperate as me
Kim Mingyu🤢: use three fingers for me and cum baby [12:49 am]
You don’t need to be told twice. You press record and insert three fingers into your cunt. You’re so wet they just slide in and you let out a long moan, increasing your speed at every thrust. It’s not long until you’re shaking and cumming all over your hand and bed.
But you don’t end the video there. You grab your phone and film your face as you suck your fingers clean while staring at the camera lense.
You: [video.] [12:51 am]
You: your turn to cum baby
As you wait for him, you go clean yourself up and grab new sheets for the bed.
Kim Mingyu🤢: [video] [12:53]
You press play and the sight of his hand is rapidly stoking his hard dick welcomes you, no more than five strokes after the video starts he lets out a long ground and is cumming all over his abs.
Kim Mingyu🤢: that was [12:54]
Kim Mingyu🤢: holy shit
Kim Mingyu🤢: I never came so fast in my life
You: embarrassingly me neither
The conversations stills for a few minutes, even though it feels like hours. What do you say after sexting with someone you supposedly hate?
You: I guess I’ll see you on saturday [01:03 am]
You're left on read a few more minutes, and you wonder if he already regrets this.
Kim Mingyu🤢: yeah right [01:06 am]
Kim Mingyu🤢: I’ll send everyone what hour to come by to prepare everything
Kim Mingyu🤢: see you then
It’s so awkward that you don’t send anything after.
You don’t regret it, but you do fear what’s going to happen.
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Note: sorry if the ending it’s a little sudden, I don’t know how to finish this but I do want to write a part two 😉
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astaroth1357 · 1 year ago
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A Brutally Honest Description of How Each Brother SHOULD Text Each Other
Lucifer
That bitch who corrects your grammar and typos.
"Is it 'who' or 'whom,' MC? You can do better."
Always formal, full sentences, good punctuation, with little typos.
Only changes when he's solo texting Diavolo where suddenly they're sending each other text spam and multiple emojis like gossiping schoolgirls.
Mammon
I swear, his texts should be basically unreadable. Not because he can't write, but because he never reads over for mistakes before hitting send.
Typos, misspellings, missing words, the whole works. Sending messages through only emojis would arguably be more coherent.
Very big fan of voice chat because his brothers make fun of his illegible texts.
Only person who can reliably decipher whatever he says and never gets on his case about it is, surprisely, Lucifer. But he's had to read it for so many years that he barely even notices the flaws anymore. His mind fills in the gaps.
Levi
VERY BIG FAN OF ALL CAPS but to express excitement.
Could write you a novel but will send you an internet link to what he's talking about instead.
Sends random sentence fragments when too excited because his thumbs get away from him and he'll accidently hit "Send" twelve times in a row.
Texts exactly how he speaks. Included his many Levia-isms which are just keyboard smashes or random ass onomatopoeia like "bluforgal"
Satan
ANOTHER BIG FAN OF ALL CAPS because to express ANGER.
Can write you a novel. Will write you a novel. And will squeeze it all into one or two texts max.
Run-on sentences galore. Man has never met a comma he doesn't immediately take in like a starving Victorian orphan.
Likes taking aesthetic pictures of his books, coffee, rain, and cats. Mostly cats. You would think he has to immediately report each one he sees to MC like an endangered species.
Asmo
The living god of emojis. He has ones downloaded that you've never even imagined before. Incredibly hyper-specific ones like "man bent over stop sign puking on ground."
The kind of person who will ALWAYS answer the questions "How are you" or "Where are you" with an immediate selfie. Even in the tub.
Comes up with brilliant hot-takes while drunk and spams them at you at 3 in the morning.
While send selfies and aesthetic pics to you first for approval before posting them to Devilgram. He expects detailed critique on image quality, filter usage, pose, composition, lighting-
Beel
I feel like Beel just matches whatever energy you give him, sometimes for no reason.
If you text him: WHAT IS THE GROCERY LIST THIS WEEK? You'll get back:
EGGS.
CHEESE.
TOMATO.
The only big difference is Belphie because those two can send each other messages that are just "Uh-huh." "No." "No way!" for an hour and come away with a complete conversation.
Belphie
Abbreviation king. If he can skip out on writing out the whole word, he'll do it by any means necessary.
Sometimes he doesn't even bother finishing people's names and uses initials like he speaks in code.
"M wnt 2 🛒 store"
"Wtch out, Lu is 😡"
Falls asleep texting often so messages can be perfectly fine one minute, then turn into a garble of letters the next.
Voice chats his dreams to MC like an audio-diary. Since he naps often, they may get 5 to 10 of these rambily messes sent to them a day.
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paper-mario-wiki · 4 months ago
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i think that there's an inherent reticence i feel in how often ive been posting selfies, not because i think that posting about myself on my own blog is wrong, but because i feel like i should be posting more stuff than just. pictures of myself. mashups and videos and stuff. i love to Make and i must not forget that.
on the other hand. i am feeling confident and happy about my appearance in a way ive quite literally never experienced in my life before, and it's a really enjoyable feeling!
considering this, i'm gonna keep on posting and reblogging my own selfies but im gonna keep saying "i should really try to make something" to myself every time i do, regardless of whether or not i actually end up listening to myself.
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