#I should do bangs again
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Do you think about me?
#me#myself#cit1zenn#cit1zennxx#lingiere#oldie but a goodie#I should do bangs again#inked girls#girls with piercings#girls with tattoos#alt girls#tattoos#alternative
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was worried parts of cr2 would not hold up on rewatch (especially seeing people hate the aeor arc so much) but ngl so far its either been good and fun as hell (travellercon, pirate arc) or just straight up banger after banger. like the xhorhas to angel of irons through to refjorged arc and then the cathedral.................. unrelenting slay
#so far the aeor arc is banging i love that its so freaky and i love that theyre committing to the bit and its cold as fuck and snowy#and everyones getting points of exhaustion from the cold#and lucien is scary . and it just feels like from the point they find molly's empty grave and then again when vess dies that theyre#spiralling as fast as an actual play dnd podcast can go towards a big scary climax with connecting threads and research its so fun#im excited for later when (almost) everyone starts getting the eyes on themselves. i love the raising stakes of it. its so spoooky#just abt to get to the ep when caleb and beau first do 😈#kiddo say#cr2 is just peak to me .#i did start at the beginning of the iron shepherds arc tho so i did hear/remember it starts slow. but idk i still like the characters enoug#but maybe i should go back to there too#(my rewatch started because i wanted to watch scenes with nila and then just kept going while i was working lmao)#nila and keg rule sm some of my fave guests. reani too#twiggy also is v good. but i should go back bc i actually dont remember calianna very well .
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For me, the most horrible thing to paint when doing Sherlock fanart is... take a guess
No, not the wallpaper, I got used to doing it.
No, also not his hair (it is not easy, but I can manage)
No, also not the kitchen tiles (I don't love to do them, but it's okay).
It is the freaking red carpet !!!!
It never looks right. The pattern is abysmal to paint, takes ages to do so and the colours are so different in different light. Get it wrong and the entire room looks off... and it seems I always get it wrong.
I am so done with it.
#sherlock#rant#art rant#currently painting IT again and cursing#maybe I should make a template so I never have to do it again when working digitally.#the freaking carpet!!!#banging my head against the desk
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P5R Random Thoughts #3: Annoyance, Anger, and Conviction
Or, just a couple more random thoughts about Joker.
I actually do enjoy that Joker seems to sometimes get genuinely frustrated with his friends' antics - I don't know if it reads that way to anyone else, but a combination of his dialogue options and character model body language definitely reads that way to me.
He's gotten mildly annoyed with Ryuji's loudness on several occasions - often having dialogue choices that are essentially some variant of "keep your voice down!" Much as Joker feels what I suspect is quite a lot of gratitude for Ryuji's unflinching support and passion (he was his first friend in Tokyo, after all - no deal, just friendship), his dialogue options also become a lot more passive aggressive during early Kaneshiro arc - and small wonder, because Ryuji's eager carelessness actually did get them caught; thankfully by Makoto, and not law enforcement. Of course, he still cares a lot about Ryuji; I think he's just a little frustrated right now.
He's usually pretty chill with Morgana bossing him around - for what reason, I honestly couldn't tell you, but he does pretty much anything that not-cat recommends. However, when Morgana spontaneously invites Yusuke to stay with Joker without asking him, Joker kind of "!!" and looks at him. It's then followed up with everyone deciding to invite themselves to Joker's place, again, without asking him and Morgana encouraging it. The scene ends with Joker straight up elbowing/jostling Morgana in the bag after everyone's left for Leblanc. Pfft.
He tells Yusuke to hurry it up in Mementos when he gets too in the zone... and much as you can't rush an artist, they do near immediately get jumped by Shadows after that, so, you know, he does have a point.
Even with Ann, Joker frequently sweatdrops at her kind of out-there ideas of how to strengthen her heart. While I wouldn't call it annoyance, per se, there is at least one scene I can think of where two of the options straight up shut her down, and the last is basically a sarcastic "good luck with that", which Ann proceeds to take at face value as encouragement, leading to Joker sweatdropping once again. Lol.
So many of these are basically the equivalent of Joker going >:( at his friends and them typically completely not noticing which is funny as heck.
Also, because I'm the kind of person who loves to read into things, I think it can tell us a little more about Joker. What actually frustrates him here?
Drawing attention to the group in the real world - something he actively tries to avoid, at first, because of consequences for him, and then, because it puts the thieves at risk
Getting himself and the group into unnecessary trouble - so we've got two instances of Joker being mindful of potential consequences
People getting invited over without being asked first - this one's a little ambiguous as to why. Could be a simple courtesy thing, could be related to Joker's earlier obvious discomfort with people getting in his personal space without permission, could be that he likes his privacy. Personally, I suspect he's actually somewhat embarrassed and a little concerned about what his friends' reactions will be to where he's staying - I do have some reasons for this interpretation but ultimately, no matter what reason you ascribe, he's definitely not initially happy about this spontaneous invitation by Morgana.
I think we can even condense the first two and say that Joker seems to be a little more focused on outcomes and consequences than much of the rest of his group, who (before Makoto joins) very much people who act in the immediate moment. He's not quite on par with Morgana's brand of pragmatism, but he does seem to always be at least thinking ahead.
There are a few exceptions, however.
Joker's actual anger is something he is evidently not good at hiding. He has an excellent poker face, but his eyes and, apparently, the way he speaks give it away entirely. To hide his anger, he outright has to not say anything and obscure his face. That actually does not seem like someone who is especially good at hiding strong emotions, even if he can school the rest of himself.
Ann, of all people, has to make excuses for his obvious disdain towards a cop. Every single dialogue option is some flavour of snippy comment. His character model continues to stare directly at said cop, even after Ann interrupts.
He is not thinking about consequences here. Joker fucking hates cops, and he is either very bad at hiding it - or he has no desire to. A very similar thing happened with Kamoshida too. He has nothing but disdain for abusers with power and authority over those they hurt. He also outright doesn't trust the justice system at all after seeing how it failed him and so many others ("They do more than the cops" <-hello. on live tv no less.).
And this leads to something else that's actually a fairly interesting facet to his character that I'm curious to see if it'll get acknowledged in some way.
For the most part, despite the Metaverse confidence and flashiness (which I feel isn't a great metric anyways - all the thieves are like that), Joker responds to most compliments and successes by either complimenting the whole team in turn, or brushing it off as luck or not a huge deal. This is likely in part a cultural thing, but when it comes to genuine appreciation being shown, he does seem to have some semblance of humility about it all - which is why it's almost hilariously shocking how pushy he can be about helping others.
He chases after Ann because she's upset, even though initially she told him not to. He corners some of the students getting exploited by Kaneshiro and won't leave until they tell him the details, even resorting to playing into the rumours about him so that they'll talk. He overhears his confidants in some kind of trouble on several occasions and near immediately asks them about it, and then continues to bring it up if they don't elaborate. It's notable that these instances are some of the few things he decides to do himself, without Morgana's explicit encouragement. I suspect a lot of this is because he has so little faith in anyone else to do the right thing - he has no trust in the justice system, and most adults don't seem to care. But Joker cares, and he will listen to what happened, and he will do something about it, and he will help, and he does so by refusing to let up - he does not wait for someone to ask for help necessarily, he just kind of goes and does it. It's not like I can't see the rationale here, but it's also, kind of, a little bit... presumptuous, in a way.
Again, it's a fascinating contrast with his typical (at least apparent) humility, and his kind of wishy-washy dialogue from early game - Joker has always been firm about this.
The official forming of the Phantom Thieves at the buffet is a scene that really caught my eye for this. Again, much as Joker has the same level of anger as his friends, his answers are still largely "probably"s and "maybe"s. He "hadn't even considered" continuing to act as Phantom Thieves. But interestingly, there is one dialogue option that is stated with none of the usual hesitancy or vagueness - "I want to help people". <- It's the crux of his awakening. This is Joker's true conviction. And he's willing to do anything, be whoever he needs to be, to see this through. He wants to help. He can't bring himself to look away.
Asserting the Phantom Thieves' brand of justice is a conviction that arises later on through proof of the effectiveness of changing hearts, and as a natural extension of his growing familiarity and confidence in their methods. Joker nearly always needs a little push to get started, but once he gets going, he's kind of relentless. He doesn't seem to be truly all that angry with either Makoto or Akechi for their questioning of the thieves' justice (barring his initial reaction), but he does, again, get annoyed at the assumption that the thieves are somehow a threat to people who aren't inflicting harm onto others - Joker says the thieves only target "criminals", implying that even though others may see them as criminals themselves, Joker does not agree. And when Makoto winds up joining them, there appears to be no residual hard feelings from him - she's like them, and she's come around.
It's likely too soon for me to state with any certainty, but I do think that's what Joker is hoping for - that people will come around if he gives them undeniable proof that they help instead of harm. Every character has at least some "selfish" motive to being a Phantom Thief, in addition to the shared goal of providing courage for those left abandoned by society. Ryuji wants positive instead of negative attention for once, Morgana wants his memories, Ann wants to alleviate her feelings of guilt surrounding Shiho, Yusuke aims to understand the human heart, and Makoto wants to feel useful and needed. What about Joker?
He started off this story just trying to help. No one believed him. He was punished for "hurting" someone and there was nothing he could say or do that would convince anyone otherwise. It was his word against society's. And when the Phantom Thieves' motives are brought up, it's the same questions: aren't they going to hurt people? Aren't they dangerous and untrustworthy? And this frustrates Joker in a similar way to the rumours surrounding his own arrest, but now - now he has proof. Proof that they helped, proof that this works. It's undeniable, to him, that real good is coming of this. And so now he has a leg to stand on; he can actually argue his point by saying "the Phantom Thieves aren't like that; look at the people they're helping, and how the people who should've done something can't do half the good they do". It's no longer his word against the rest of the world. He's counting on people being unable to deny what they are forced to witness.
In a way, Joker now has grounds not just to plead the Phantom Thieves' justice... but also his own innocence and good intentions. His defense of their justice is also, I believe, a defense of his own ego, to an extent.
#i'm only partway through kaneshiro's palace so please do engage if you want to say something but no spoilers!#this went ALL OVER THE PLACE lol i banged this out in a haze earlier this morning#story once again reads way too much into minor details. whatever. i'm having fun#story plays persona 5#story plays p5r#persona 5#p5r#storyrambles#p5 joker#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#p5 meta#should i use my analysis tag. does this count.#i say it does even though this is objectively disorganized#call me ace detective the way i am ace. and also a detective.#<-my beloved analysis tag i've missed you it's been so long
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wip wednesday (it’s saturday where i am but let’s not think about that)
so i posted one on wednesday here but that was before i was tagged by my lovely lovely moots @kyletogaz and @femalefemur 🫂💓
so here’s a sneak peak of a teeny tiny toxic ex-bf!price thing i’ve been thinking about the last few days
but then one day john’s calls just stopped, and the weight of his eyes on your back when you walked home was gone.
cautiously, after two months of silence and no more surprise gifts, you figured he’d finally moved on and you started hesitantly dating again under your friends’ encouragement. nothing serious, just getting you back into the swing of things starting with a friend of a friend. someone half familiar, safe; no pressure, just dinner.
you should’ve known john had been away, back on the job instead of accepting your decision to split. that his silence was born from forced separation and not respect.
he’s never taken you serious before, why would he have started then?
thank you for the tags guys!!
no pressure tags (or wait til it’s wednesday again? lmao) : @sentientcave @gemmahale @glossysoap @pricegouge @mikichko @syoddeye
#took me a while to get to this but i was so stuck on my ghoap thing my writers block was killer#then i decided to bang this out but i wasn’t sure if it was fleshy wnough for a wip post or not bc im new to doing shorter stuff so im a#lil self conscious about it :/ BUT i think it’s going good#should post in a day or two and then be able to look at ghoap with fresh eyes#thanks again guys for tagging me!!#wip wednesday#john price x reader#tag game
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MY THIRD PIECE(s) FOR @mcytblraufest !! o7
LETS DO THIS ONE LAST TIME, these are for @allusiontomemes 's fic, [ DREAMS FROM WITHIN THE CAGE ] !! we got horrors beyond comprehension, we got multiple universes, we got accidentally destroying said universes, we got desert duo- come on down and see what else is up with these guys!!
thank you allusion and @riceofthepuffedvariety you made me go insane o7
#hermitcraft#goodtimeswithscar#mumbojumbo#mcyt au fest#mcytblraufest23#i had a bigger piece planned but i have been fighting for my life to do things the last 3 days so#i have taken the L and am using the 2 quickies i drew as my big bang pieces for this fic#I WILL FINISH THE BIG ONE......... when i am up for it again vnskdfjvndf#my own hubris was indeed my downfall BUT. BUT!. i still have art for this fic so thats a win for me#also you should read this fic ive been so ill about it i am constantly thinking of aftermath situations#i have put the three of them so gently into my pocket for safe keeping#genuinely putting them in my mouth shaking them around like a dog and its chew toy#and i will be drawing more of this. i am sad that i wasnt able to finish the big piece and draw grian. but i will. i Will#lays down in bed and sleeps for 1000 years
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it really is hilarious how little objective quality has to do with how much I'll love an RPG. larian makes games that are objectively very good, but don't really resonate with me personally when I play them, for whatever reason. bioware makes games of wildly erratic levels of quality that cause my soul to vibrate at pitches heard only by dolphins and god.
#I played through the majority of divinity original sin 2 and you could hold me at gunpoint and I still wouldn't remember much of anything#about what the fuck the story was about. I was on a ship at several points and there was a haunted house.#ifan is hot and the dumbest man who ever lived. that's about it#I played ALL of divinity original sin 1 and it's almost a complete blank. I have no memory of this place. who is this woman tegan#meanwhile I have been through the insane open worlds and bloated crafting systems of da:i and me:a more times than sanity should allow#and you know the real fucked up thing? *whisper* I'll do it again. I'll go back to the hinterlands of my own free will#I'll go shard hunting. I'll play dragon age 2 again and again b/c I'd buy a dlc about all the characters in that going grocery shopping#the heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing#I guess they got me early with jade empire and that's all she wrote I imprinted or something#I have a vague feeling I don't vibe with the larian pacing maybe? their games tend to open with a bang and then get interminable for me#(again: clearly this is not about me actually having taste or standards for pacing I've played da:i more than seven times lol#very much a thing about me more than about either of these games)#no matter what I'm so grateful to bg3 for bringing the crpg back tho and I hope the industry follows that up#(granted after recent developments the industry might crash and burn and have a little postapocalypse rebuilding to do#before it becomes truly relevant ahahaaaaa god. god.)
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can’t stop thinking about all the possibilities for her in S2
Men DNI
#I wanna see her lead zaun even tho I feel it’s somewhat unlikely#I want her backstory#fuckkk they better not do her dirty :((#im emotional and im stressed and ive cried 3 times today thinkinf about her#uhh god im vrying again 😭#ugh#fuck im thinkign too much i cant even write down what else i want to see of her#I want to see her living a happy peacful life away from zaun with a smile on her face in 4k#I also wouldn’t mind seeing her naked#I wanna see her pretty scars#also please add renata to the show#Im not a fan of ‘renata is sevika!!!!’ theory because. it just doesn’t make sense to me.#and idk it feels like it takes away from sevika as a character#also#they dont even look the same. the only similarities i can see are the arms.#idk where people pulled that theory from#ALSO another reason i dont like it is because i think renata and sevika should bang#i dont want them to be the same singular person because I want both of them at once 🫶#sevika#arcane#<3#there’s def a lot more to list but i can’t think rn so im gonna go sleep:3
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🐺🫧230722
#bang chan#christopher bang#bbl pst#he is being active because everything i do this weekend has no service cjdndnd#i tried to post these from the beach like 40 times so if they randomly start popping up i’m sorry 🫠#also yes you should bb also the tan again bring that back 😭
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it’s that time again, time to put Kaneki in the mailbox
#kaneki time#friday btw. what should we do#IM DRAIWNG RIZE ON KANEKIDAY INSGESD OF F KANWKEJ EM😔#I will come back for you soon my love….#I want to write him love letters but idk how to write#I don’t know how I’d frame it and tbh I don’t even want to write the letters I just wanna decorate them and the envelope#make crazy pen pal packages for him#but again idk how to talk to pen pals and since he can’t really respond it’s hard to continue conversations#or regularly ask about something he mentioned starting (poor boy can’t mention or start 😔)#if I got better at Japanese (here we fucking go again. I haven’t studied Japanese all holidays and I’ve had weeks and weeks off.)#I think it would be better if I got up earlier but I find it hard to sleep unless I stay up late#Japanese is probably a really good morning activity#but I’m never up in the morning 💔💔#I wish Kaneki was real so he could pinch me until I wake up at 9#I don’t know if he’d be able to get up at 9 unless he was interrupted but. knowing him he’s always getting interrupted#I doubt he’d miss me enough in the morning to do that even if I asked#he’s a kind person maybe he will#Haise banged on pots for Saiko#I don’t think I’d be as good a friend for him as Saiko
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I hate when I’ll be complaining about some stupid bullshit a coworker does to other coworkers and half the time their response is to lower their voice and go “well…. You know…. I’m pretty sure they’re… on the spectrum, you know?” And every time I have a split second when I have to consider saying “you know I’m autistic, right?” just to make them vaguely uncomfortable for a few minutes and actually think about what they’re implying but of course I do not do that because the gratification is not worth a large sect of shitty coworkers knowing that about me and then talking about me like that every time I do something vaguely annoying or dumb but man…. It does get tempting sometimes
#like idk!!! sometimes the coworkers in question DO display some common autistic traits#but that is NEVER what is being complained about (at least not by me) so WHY are we bringing it up like that el oh el#like when I say ‘yeah I don’t like this coworker because of the shitty fucking things she did to my friend’#the response should not be ‘well I think she’s autistic isn’t that so funny she’s so obsessive about stuffed animals it’s annoying’#shut up shut up SHUT UP AND DIE#I don’t CARE that they talk too loud I don’t CARE that they’re bad a social cues I don’t CARE that they do ‘weird things’#and it’s so. HFDJSJKSKSKS AAAGGHHHHH#whether they’re autistic or not MAYBE that’s not what should be getting brought up during a conversation like that when it has NOTHING to do#with it#also maybe we shouldn’t be doing shit like whispering ‘on the spectrum’ like its some awful terrible thing#just thoughts idk#and the thing is too is that even if I told these ppl I was autistic#they would 100% be the types that are like ‘oh? but you don’t ACT autistic I don’t think you are’#like actually I got very good at masking for these reasons thnx#also you think autism = Sheldon from the Big Bang theory and nothing else#but I already learned my lesson cuz I told a coworker that I wasn’t sure about exactly twice#one of them went ‘oh THATS why you’re so dumb and don’t realize when other ppl don’t like you and take advantage of you’#and then the other one went on a mansplaining spiel about how me being autistic was why adhd meds didnt work on me??????#so yeah. never doing that again. haha. hahahaha. hahahaha……#this actually happened a few days ago but it’s been Bothering me so much#I hate my fucking job….#kaz rambles
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im eating chicken with a fork and it made me think about how great opposable thumbs are like if we didnt have opposable thimbs we couldnt turn a ring pop around while holding it or open ring pop wrapper or
#my art#art#my ocs#gabe#trigger#trans#he/him for both#this chicken is realyly fucking anjoying i hate it#i needa draw gummy more hes soooo twirls hair#also i realize npbody has any comtext for these 2#but i feel like i should at the least mention that gabe used 2 be called gummy bc he was a fandom oc nd then i changed him a tonnso now his#name is gabriel for blue curtain reasons#trigger stayed trigger bc i think its fitting#idk what to do about sunbeam tho i would rather like bang my hand in a door than call her sunny but she needs an S name#their story is like not chill at all btw ots like insane but idk how 2 draw so this is all i do#when i learn how to draw and write and color and characterize and my body stops trying to kill me and i graduate and trans people become leg#al again and etc its over for you hoes
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jopzer........ good ship.
#beebles#sometimes i forget#and then the terror makes me crazy again#sometimes two lackeys should have a weird strained relationship where one calls the other a class traitor#and then and and then they. and they#good heavens#i should finish things lost things found#good fucking fanfiction if i do say so myself.#thomas jopson and solomon tozer. you are in love.#idc if they never interacted on my screen. they're crazy making.#i used to be number one jopzer poster on ao3 but i haven't written for the terror in like a year lol#and hickeytozer caught my eye.... just a little....#marv got me out of terror slump with baby bang i need them to do some shit like that again
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save me old flipnote studio MVs.......
#im going thru old flipnotes i used to watch years ago and ouggghhg so many good ones#is twenty one pilots still popular.... do people still remember the TRNDSTTER and marble soda meme.........#its like im unlocking some sort of primal part of my brain and everything is coming back to me. one of my biggest inspirations as a kid#i still remember thinking the final transmission lyrics were the coolest thing and watching =TopHat= Bee and Melissa over and over#theres a very specific feeling of longing and nostalgia looking back and watching these again years later#especially when there isnt anything genshin or mcyt and instead its either fnaf undertale eddsworld or another obscure#interest... and not even fnaf sister location its like fnaf 3 and 2. its THAT old. and a lot of oc MVs especially pokemon ocs and furries..#god but they were so creative u know. i still find it amazing ppl took this little lightbox animation on the fucking NINTENDO DS and#cranked it all the way to 11.. like if u look at the transitions and movement its so fucking fluid its insane..!! HOW DO YOU MAKE THE#CHARACTERS SPIN??? AND CHANGING CAMERA ANGLES??? and keep in mind youre doing this all with a shitty stylus#on a THREE BY TWO INCH SCREEN. you only get two layers you can go up to 29FPS and you only have 999 slides to work with#and 24FPS eats up a lot of that. absolutely insane it literally boggles my mind every time i think about it. AND SOME ARE EVEN FULL COLOR#i forgot how popular EDM was back then too...they were really good for timing beats though so you get a lot of MVs with#strobe last and marble soda. porter robinsons goodbye to a world was also popular with undertale and oc MVs. also a lot of vocaloid#someone made a flipnote abt the warner bros fnaf movie being announced EIGHT FUCKING YEARS AGO. it even used the stay calm audio from#the office.... i wonder how theyre doing now... i love you shitty grainy MV audio.. but i have mixed feelings abt the flashing colors#ppl LOVED animating the sans vs frisk fight. aishite and primadonna were also big ones they were SICK AS FUCK#lots of these inspired my old oc designs.. a lot of my characters had side bangs with one eye covered. animal ears and simple eyes too#now i kinda wanna try my hand at the marble soda meme cause i loved it as a kid lol.. i wonder if i should compare my old and new art here#UGHHHH IM SO NORMAL ABOUT NOSTALGIA. IM SO NORMAL ABT MY SCHOOL BOOK DRAWINGS WITH SHIBA BROWS#yapping#nostalgia
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as I'm going back over my past history and items and journals and years, I come across all sorts of things, like the pencil I saved from that so-precious memory from second grade, and a pair of flip flops I've been missing for two years, and [checks notes] the modern-high-school-AU-kidnapped-by-a-serial-killer story I wrote in late high school jdfsjdfsjkjlksfd
#i can't wait to find out what red flags I didn't see in my own self back when I last read this thing in 2015 hfdhfdhjsfd#also. there's gonna be like a good sentence here and there and then CRINGE. the whole rest of everything is just me still trying to copy th#breathing pace (essentially) and ways-of-describing-things of mainstream authors like I thought I was supposed to#so this'll be somewhat painful but also god what a joy and a gift and an honor and a delight to get to hold this close to my heart#and witness it with understanding and empathy and slow reflection and care like my past younger self deserves#i'm so lucky i'm alive to be here and do this#i'm so grateful i'm headed towards welcoming back and embracing the last little girl i was that still felt a lot of things#so excited for her focus and precision and tenacity and constant curious joy and movement to be back someday#i'm afraid people won't like the me i was before rule after rule and then dangers#but my god it'll feel so good to be the fully-flowing energy machine and dance and conduit again how will I have enough bother to care?#people who are good to each others' nervous systems cumulatively feel better and better#if i'm not good for you and yours then you really truly SHOULD go elsewhere and find someone who makes YOUR self feel right and light + war#anyway now that i wrote an essay in the tags as usual [nervous laughter]#personal#add to journal#words n rhythm#WHY DID I FEEL CAPABLE OF UNDERTAKING A STORY LIKE THIS#cradling my past self gently but also BANGING my HEAD against the WALL lmao#i'm proud of myself for writing and sharing this and its creative ideas. even if i don't like it now or feel ashamed or see mistakes.#anything. it mattered that it came to me and it mattered that i explored it and it mattered that i poured myself through it to help shape i#and it mattered that I left it on the internet so that now it still exists. i'm going to honor this story no matter what current me would#objectively think about it if it was written by anyone else.#this is a gift i give myself now.#this is a lot of what I learn and learn to do#trauma evolution#mosswrites
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Ummmm thought about bitb. Gonna throw up
#i should relisten to it honestly#but i said i would watch amphibia#and i was gonna watch the what ifs and rolleds and everything#oughough#when when rand was the one with the least to live for anf he was the ine to survive#this was his chance to do somethin good for once and go out eith s bang but now hes actually got to live#he has to live for the three of them#SOBBING#and ROLAN FUCK#uh oh im thinking about bug vs human internal vs external conscious vs instinctual again#the bugs are so interesting im never gonna be ok#jrwi spoilers#bitb spoilers#jrwi bitb
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