#I should also clarify that writing this kind of fanfiction is by no means “less than” or doesn’t require the same amt of work

[cheeto-flavoured-pasta]

Me: OK so I’m planning on finishing this original series as a way to polish up my writing skills before I write more advanced stories and gradually start publishing my work on bigger platforms—

Brain: Hey what if we deleted all the stories we worked on for years and started writing self-indulgent Character x Reader fluffy hurt/comfort fanfiction on tumblr instead? Even though you don’t even want to do that?

Me: Dude WHY do you keep suggesting this-

*note that publishing non-fanfic work is not the end goal for everyone and that is A-OK! People have different aspirations and that’s 100% a good thing.

[otrtbs]

Hi I hope you're doing well 🌷

I had a question. I'm totally asking out of pure curiosity, it's not a criticism or anything of the sort.

In ahb (this masterpiece of yours) Sirius's favorite painting is Degas' Dancers.

I wanted to know if you knew the background of this painting and if making it Sirius' favorite was a deliberate choice or if you had no idea at all.

Because the Ballerinas in Opera Garnier in Paris were all really young and mostly, they were poor. The dancers were often their family's hope to crawl out of misery.

The audience was full of men.

In fact, the sad flip side was that there was a whole prostitution network behind the scene. With these young girls. Men could pay for backstage access to watch ballerinas change and sometimes rape them.

So Degas was a big customer.

That's how he painted the dancers and most of his works.

That's again how he sculpted the ballerina, her tutu was added meaning the 14 year old girl was posing nude.

Degas is also suspected of being Jack the Ripper, there are a certain number of credible leads and potential evidences.

That's why I was wondering if you knew.

Since there is this whole chapter where they insult Picasso (as they should) I found it strange that Degas being a known major p*do did not receive the same treatment.

Ps: I'm french, I don't know if I made any mistakes writing this, if I have please excuse me I tried my best 🙏

Okay hi, hello! I am doing well and I hope you are as well! You have unlocked Art Historian Thesis Nat, so I am going to put an extremely lengthy post under the cut, I'm so sorry (this is literally my area of study,,, i fear i am incapable of being brief about this)

I do want to clarify that right off the bat, I don't necessarily think many of these art historical figures are "good people". Like none of them are the best, most moral, upstanding citizens you should model your life after (but they're also dead sooooo). But I also understand that I did take some time in my fanfiction to make my hatred for Picasso very clear, and so I can also understand the confusion in not extending that same hatred towards Degas. But there are a few reasons for that, that I'll try to explain below!

The direct historical documentation of Pablo Picasso's violence towards the women in his life is vast and damning. If you want particularly good insight into his violence and abuse, then I recommend reading Marina Picasso's (Picasso's granddaughter) memoir titled: Picasso: My Grandfather. I also recommend Françoise Gilot's (romantic partner of Picasso) books, Life with Picasso and Picasso and Matisse. It is through the memories of the people who loved Picasso and who loved him in turn, that we hear of his sadistic nature that drove his lovers to suicide and we get personal letters that he wrote to Gilot in which he says things like "Dora, for me, was always a weeping woman… And it’s important, because women are suffering machines" and "For me there are only two kinds of women: goddesses and doormats." His granddaughter has this to say about him: “He submitted [women] to his animal sexuality, tamed them, bewitched them, ingested them, and crushed them onto his canvas. After he had spent many nights extracting their essence, once they were bled dry, he would dispose of them.” And Gilot says: "I am the only one to not have been sacrificed to the sacred monster(…) and is alive to tell the tale. He was a wonderful person to be with, it was like fireworks, amazingly creative, so intelligent and seductive(…) but he was also very cruel, sadistic and ruthless with others and with himself (…) It was the greatest love of my life, but you have to protect yourself (…) The others did not, they clung to the powerful minotaur and paid a very high price."

Why this matters: The evidence for Degas being so virulently misogynistic and cruel towards women is extremely less substantial and more speculative in nature.

Degas being Jack the Ripper. Degas being Jack the Ripper started off as a tiktok theory posed in early 2024, (though you can find an article as early as 2004 written by The Guardian's art critic here) and while fun to think about and speculate, it isn't true. August and September and November of 1888 is when the Jack the Ripper crimes were committed in London and Degas was in the South of France at that time receiving medical treatment because he was in extremely poor health. (Which you can find in The Letters of Edgar Degas edited by Theodore Reff (I'm sure there's. free PDF version out there somewhere)). Also, self-admittedly speculative, but Degas didn't visit the East-End of London when he did make his excursions to London because he was classist 😭. So, it would be odd for him to know the ins and outs of the streets where the murders took place. And also he had failing eyesight starting at 36, so the odds of him being Jack the Ripper are extremely slim.

The Ballerinas Yes, while it is true that the ballerina's were often subject to horrific conditions and were prostitutes for the "wealthy" patrons of the opera house, this does not mean that Degas partook in that. in fact, most historical documentation surmises he didn't. Degas considered himself a "realist" painter rather than an impressionist painter, wishing to document "real life" in all of its ugliness, beauty and unstylized truth. Therefore his primary concern was documenting the opera house and ballet in all of the moments, not just when the girls were dancing on stage. And in many of his paintings, Degas captures the opera patronsn in his ballerina paintings as lurkers behind the stage curtains as sinister black shadows, or as men predatorily watching in nice suits (e.g. Ballet, 1876 and The Rehearsal of the Ballet Onstage (1874)). But Degas himself, was NEVER a ballerina patron, he is even quoted as saying "People call me the painter of dancing girls. It has never occurred to them that my chief interest in dancers lies in rendering movement...". (now this is not because Degas was morally outraged at what was happening to the ballerina's, but because he viewed the men abusing the girls as committing a sin against God by sleeping with prostitutes). But while Degas had access to backstage, he was never a customer. And in fact, Degas is a notorious, well-documented celibate. This is because Degas believed sleeping with women would make him lose his special painting ability. No lie. Here's a direct quote from Vincent Van Gogh in his a letter to his brother Theo about the artist: "Degas lives like a little lawyer and does not like women, for he knows that if liked them and went to bed with them, he would become intellectually diseased and would no longer be able to paint." Degas was also known to reject ballerina's advances as well (again, fearing women would take away his magic painting power).

Feelings towards women By all accounts, Degas friends describe him as being reclusive towards women to being jovial with them, but always kind to them outside of a working environment. He even developed friendships with his fellow contemporary women painters. In a working environment, Degas was obsessed with perfection, demanding ballerinas contort their bodies in painful positions, and making them hold those positions for hours at a time. By all accounts, this was not because he hated them, but was obsessed with capturing their movements, the limitations of the human body, and he demanded perfection from himself. (x x x) (i.e. his obsession for his work and drive for perfection as a painter made him demanding and harsh towards his subjects, not his pure hatred of women).

Conclusions: So by many accounts, Degas was not particularly fond of women, and had little regard for his dancers. But the claims that he must have slept with the ballerina's and been a patron/customer "because that's what all men did back then" are not backed by any evidence. only evidence to the contrary. I went in on Picasso because those that were close to him have written first-hand accounts of his monstrocity. This is not the case with Degas. So, while I didn't tear him down like I did Picasso, I wasn't lauding him as a saint either. I highly recommend reading the article called Degas's Misogyny by Norma Broude which details the ways in which modern times have run away with this idea of Degas being a sadistic woman-hater and how we've gotten to this point. Anyway, TLDR; I was aware of the dark "underside" of the Paris Ballet at the time in which Degas was painting his works. Do I think he is Jack the Ripper and a man who participated in ballerina prostitution? No, not at all. At the end of the day, I am just an art history girl, telling anyone who will listen that there is not enough documentation on Degas to take these claims as 100% truth, or put that man up there with Picasso. Peace and Love! <3

[writingquestionsanswered]

Hello. I'm writing fanfiction and I'm very thankful for your blog, it is helping me alot.

So one problem I'm finding in my writing is that paragraphs don't feel "flowy", they feel "choppy" and dull. Like there isn't a flow between the sentences, and it feels like they are shoved together. Here are examples from my writing to make it clearer:

1.In his 25 years of life, Sara was the only woamn to occupy his heart and mind. Every woman looked dull in comparison to the divine torrent that was her. She had full possesion of him, and she didn't even know it.

2.And today was his first event as a teacher. The event was taking place in 'X school' this year, but he was sure next year it will be in 'Y school'. He trained his students well enough to beat 'Y's' students.

Did you feel what I'm talking about? Or is it all in my head?

Writing Feels Choppy/Not Flowing

It's hard to tell overall flow from a few snippets, and when a paragraph is separated from the rest of the narrative, it can be difficult to tell whether something is an issue or is clarified in the surrounding context. Here are some potential issues, though, if it helps to give you an idea of what to watch out for to make things feel less clunky. Just keep in mind, this is my subjective interpretation with limited context, so use your best judgment if it feels it doesn't apply:

Paragraph #1 - "In his 25 years of life, Sara was the only woamn to occupy his heart and mind." This is probably clearer with the surrounding context, but as a snippet, going from the pronoun "his" to the name "Sara" was immediately confusing. But, as long as it's clear who "he" is prior to this sentence, it's fine.

"the divine torrent that was her..."

This is certainly an evocative description, but without any context it feels a little clunky. As long as there is context for why he'd think of her as a "divine torrent" and what that means to him when he describes her that way, it should be fine.

"She had full possession of him, and she didn't even know it."

I see what you're trying to do here, but "full possession" feels a bit heavy in a paragraph that otherwise feels like it's trying to be romantic. So, I think that lack of tone agreement makes it feel a bit clunky. If that's your intention, to illustrate a love that has obsessive and even dangerous qualities, that's fine. Otherwise, you might consider rewording to something that fits the romantic tone a bit more, something like: "She held his soul completely, yet she didn’t even realize it." Paragraph #2 - "And today was his first event as a teacher. The event was taking place in 'X school' this year, but he was sure next year it will be in 'Y school'. He trained his students well enough to beat 'Y's' students."

Using a present tense word like "today" or "now" in the past tense is tricky. It doesn't work great here because we go from the present tense "today" to past progressive "was taking place" to past "he was sure" and "he trained," so it's kind of all over the place. Also, using both "today" and "this year" to refer to the event in question is confusing. Also, it's confusing that he's at the event at X school today, but he's focused on his students beating the students of Y school next year, at an event that hasn't even been decided for sure yet. You could shore things up a bit by doing something like:

"Today's event, which was his first as a teacher, was taking place at X school. They had the best team in the state, so he knew the odds of his students winning were slim. He was sure next year the event would be held at Y school, and he was confident his students were trained well enough to beat Y school's team." So, some general tips:

1 - Make sure the sentence/paragraph makes sense within the surrounding context. 2 - Make sure you have tense agreement within the sentence/paragraph. 3 - Make sure your evocative descriptions have meaning.

4 - When using pronouns rather than names, make sure the subject (who the pronoun belongs to) is clear.

5 - If your character should be focused on the present events, make sure their thoughts and feelings are relevant to what's happening.

Happy writing!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking ♦ Learn more about WQA here

[rainstormcolors]

Hey, so i wanted to ask a question about the yugioh rarepair thing: will it be obligatory for the ship to have three or less fics on AO3 or is it an idea of the number? Because i looked up a specific ship that i wanted to write and it had around 8, but most of them had the characters as like, a backgroud ship

Hello!

I want this event to be fun and for fun, so I don't mean for there to be strict rules about what qualifies as a very rarepair --- people should create for the ship they want to see more of if they feel inspired to create. I have some Discord friends who seem excited about Stubbornshipping for the event, and it's a ship which exceeds three fanfictions but is none the less uncommon.

The "three or less fanfictions" thing was in regards to if someone would like for me to create fan art for their story. If the ship has that little of existing material and you'd enjoy me creating art for you, people can contact me (via tagging or DMs) in that case for art. Even then, it's the writer's choice -- one shouldn't feel obligated to ask me for art if they just want to write something for a one-of-a-kind or nearly one-of-a-kind ship. But I also would like to be able to create some art for people who would enjoy it.

But people should create what would be fun for them, even if there are a dozen fanfictions for the ship. It's nice to see what people create and them having fun and sharing things.

Hopefully this clarifies things. I don't want anyone feeling pressured about things. Thank you for asking.

[queenofbaws]

One good turn deserves another, so now I'd like to thank you for YOUR kind words and well-wishes! I should probably clarify as well that I'm no stranger to writing in general - I've worked as an editor and even have my own story in the works. It's fanfiction that proves daunting, as I fear I won't be able to portray the characters accurately or even write believable modern-day interactions due to my own... social shortcomings, so to speak. If you have any advice to offer, I'd be rather grateful!

!!! well lookit that!!! aw man, if you're already writing your own story, you're so ahead of the game!!! ;)c on the rare occasions i've been asked for fic advice, my first step is almost always to, like, get a feel for writing rules in general, so cross that sucker right off the list!!! heheh

i'll throw a few nuggets of extremely long-winded "wisdom" below the cut for anyone interested, but tl;dr the BIGGEST and BEST advice i think i could give to someone hesitant to dip their toe into writing/posting fic is this: we're all playing pretend here - and i don't say that to minimize anyone's efforts!!! not even slightly.

if anyone takes playing pretend seriously, it's ME, angsty longfic mcgee, but at the end of the day, fanfic is YOUR sandbox. YOU make the rules. YOU make what you want to make the way you want to make it when you want to make it. everyone wants the validation of hearing that other people enjoyed their story, that they're moved by their art, but sometimes things won't hit the way you hoped they would, or people wind up having a different interpretation of a character than you and don't hesitate in letting you know, and man, that sucks when it happens and it can make the idea of continuing to post really, really daunting, but it's still your sandbox. if you like it? if you enjoyed making it? if it was fun and fulfilling and you felt satisfied once it was finished?????????? THAT'S what you gotta hang onto. THAT'S what's gonna keep you moving forward. <3

(and, just saying, from personal experience? once you take the dive and give it a try? ooooh baby. there's nothing like it ;P i've mixed too many beach metaphors in here. that has to mean something.)

LONG-WINDED RAMBLING, GO! i want to preface this by saying, hi, this is 100% just me running my mouth about how i go about writing fic - if anything i say here doesn't work for you, ignore it! wholesale!!! everyone has different processes, everyone approaches writing in a different way, and even my writing buds and i butt heads sometimes about the fic-writing process, so imagine this is simply me offering suggestions on little scraps of paper, neatly piled up on a silver platter. you're free to fling that platter out of my hands at any time ;P ha!!!

i COMPLETELY understand how trying to get a pre-existing character's voice down can be intimidating, but at the end of the day...everyone's going to view them a little differently anyway!!! that's one of the beautiful things about fic - two people can look at the same character and see completely different facets of them, and that in NO way makes them wrong, or somehow less valid! here are some of the things i do when i'm trying to get into a character's headspace or find my version of their voice:

mannerisms! the first thing i always try and figure out is how the character behaves in canon. do they hold themselves confidently? do they get along with other people easily? if it's visual media like a video game, what kind of idle animations are we working with here - nail biting, hip swaying, anxious shifting, slouching, yawning, knuckle-cracking? i like doing this a little bit better than just trying to pin down what kind of "personality archetype" they have, like...you can say ashley brown is the scared nerd character, sure, and that's one level of her, but she's also ruthless when she needs to be, quick to make a joke, and deeply, deeply curious. digging down into a character's pieces-parts instead of just looking at them as a whole can really make your characterization of them feel more HUMAN.

actual source material dialogue. how does the character actually TALK in the source material (if they do, in fact, talk at all)? do they stammer? pause often? are they using high-scoring scrabble words in day-to-day conversations, or do they mostly just grunt and nod when asked a question? if you're worried about keeping YOUR version of them close to the source material or canon, i always say look for those verbal tics right off the bat. to keep using until dawn examples, josh tends to talk slowly but FLUIDLY, if that makes sense, like he's been practicing how cool guys talk in movies; chris, on the other hand, tends to start and stop, or have a jerkier sort of cadence, shifting in pitch the more agitated or anxious he is. mike talks to himself a lot, whether it's to make inane comments or reassure himself that he's okay; matt really sort of stays quiet unless he's talking to another person. that sort of thing!

the jurassic park method. okay. okay stick with me here. this one's my fav. this one is genuinely my secret weapon when it comes to writing believable fic characters. you know how...in the original jurassic park...the whole thing was they filled the dinosaurs' genetic gaps with frog DNA? yeah. yeah i'm about to tell you to do that. only with blorbo from your shows. is there someone in your life who reminds you of a character you're writing for? they don't have to be a perfect match, but maybe there's someone out there who you think "aw man, i bet sam would wear that," or "i could so hear jess saying that," or "i bet she and emily would get along..." this is me taking you by the hands to say use that. fill those gaps with real life experiences. this one's really more about making characters feel realistic than it is keeping them true to canon, but man..................sometimes it really makes them shine, know what i mean???

as for believable modern-day interactions...WOOF. i also feel like...i have missed that bus on that one. 🤣 i wish i had straightforward advice for this, but i have GOT to be real with you, i am a mostly housebound millenial who recently had a very sobering conversation with my doctor about how i've hit the age where i need to actually pay attention to my blood pressure and cholesterol, and boy, that...that really makes you feel very

sdklfjskldf heheheheheheh

my biggest tip in terms of MODERN social interactions??? don't put too much effort into making them modern at all! that sounds counter-intuitive, i'll explain: language moves really, really quickly, and it's constantly changing. if you throw a lot of slang into an interaction, it's going to date itself pretty quickly. instead, when i'm writing, i really focus on the interaction feeling BELIEVABLE. not even "natural," not even "normal," whatever those mean, but believable. can you BELIEVE that characters would interact with each other this way. cuz let's face it: sometimes. in real life. social interactions. occur. strangely. that doesn't make them less BELIEVABLE.

(and for what it's worth???????? a lot of time canon doesn't care about modern day interactions either. emily and jess's fight in the lodge is.......the best example......i could give you. there's....there's a lot going on in that one. the bar has been set...very low on that one alkdjfalksjfasjdfklsdjf hahahahahahahahah!)

i'll stop here before i literally turn inside-out from word barfing so much, but to revisit my very, very first point up top...writing and sharing fic can be SO nerve-wracking. 100%. no question. writing is personal!!! if you're writing your own story, i'm sure you totally get that. it's a piece of you! and by putting it out where everyone can see, you're making yourself vulnerable, and that can be so, so terrifying. but. BUT. i am personally of the opinion that the benefits outweigh that moment of trepidation ;)c if this is something you've been wanting to do, i wholeheartedly say give it a shot! if you decide it's not for you, eh, at least you tried, right? and if you love it, then look at that!!! a whole new world opens up at your fingertips!!!

and you'll for sure have ME rooting for you, either way :D

[liquidstar]

hi with this post going around i wanna copypaste some replies i left in response to another reblog too. the rebloger was saying that its also okay to enjoy problematic content (which, to be clear, i agreed with on a base level, but felt it needed more context since that can often be code for something much less nuanced)

this one should come with a bit of a disclaimer about whatever the thing youre enjoying is and in what way though. thoughtcrimes arent real, but actively choosing to watch lolicon hentai is a conscious decision. though ik thats not what youre talking abt here, i just feel like its something important to bring up, bc of how these types of discussions can get warped to mean "my frozen incest fanfiction is actually totally ok and if you disagree youre harming ppl w OCD" which i dont want the take away to be. i dont want ppl to use vague stereotypes of my disorder as a talking point to justify that kind of shit- because thats not the point and also doesnt help people with OCD at all! esp with POCD to be lumped together with... that crowed. again ik thats not what you mean im just saying it to clarify the slippery slope before someone takes it there for real! critical thought is important at all turns and such. and people with OCD are not incapable of critical thought, or understanding when media can actually be harmful in the real world. we still know how to separate the two, as should most people. that's what i mean by the response to it mattering more than the act of consuming. we might struggle a bit more with aspects of this, usually in the mental side (ruminations and obsessions) and thought crimes arent real! but actual actions are!

unfortunately, you wont actually see these replies if you check the comments (which is why i added them here). because i was blocked seconds after leaving them. apparently, even though i gave the responder the benefit of the doubt with the whole "slippery slope" of "yeah! fiction doesnt effect reality! lets all draw explicit content of children!" i checked and they... actually did in fact write what seems to be voltron pedoincest fanfiction and had "antis dni" in their bio (i missed that somehow, honestly thats on me). i think they also deleted their reblog, so i doubt people will find them. which is for the best because im not trying to get harassment sent anyones way either.

but this is still exactly what i was afraid of- our disorder being used as a talking point for the same stupid pedantic tumblr discourse that was the issue to begin with. being used as if we're not autonomous people who can make our own choices regarding media consumption, but rather an objectified hypothetical to get a moral one-upping in the black-and-white view of the outgroup. stop that shit. if youre here to do that either way YOU are part of the problem. you are not helping those with OCD this way. and the second that is pointed out you will delete the post supporting them and block the op? fuck you!

and the thing is, in terms of OCD, ANY mentality with a set of morals presented as all-or-nothing black-and-white is harmful. if youre seeing this and thinking it "dunks" on the other side of the discourse, youre missing the point. because the other side does the exact same shit. in this case, the argument with that "pro" crowed is basically "either all media depictions of xyz are good, or all media depictions of xyz are bad, and since i enjoy some depictions of xyz then they must all be good, and anyone who says otherwise is an evil anti" (aforementioned black-and-white thinking).

so with that, you posit the idea that anyone who has any sort of critical thought or issues with certain tropes of depictions of sensitive topics in any piece of media ever, must be an Evil Puritanical Conservative, ergo you have to never voice critique in media or the way it's engaged with. HOW THE FUCK IS THAT BETTER FOR PEOPLE WITH MORAL OCD? YOU ARE JUST AS BAD!!!!!!!!!!!!

dont you dare use this shit as a talking point in your pedantic discourse when the whole point of the post is THATS THE ISSUE TO BEGIN WITH! this shit is just as much the root of the problem as what i was talking about in the post. dont use this shit to outright tell us that we cant think for ourselves and have to go by your stringent unnuanced discourse as a guide. thats the issue. thats the problem i was talking about to begin with. YOU just as much are the voice of the fictional tumblr discourser inside our heads, youre just using different buzzwords. and this site continues to be awful to people with OCD. fellow OCDers do yourselves a favor and, like me, get the fuck out of these groups.

look this site really is awful for ppl with OCD so i just wanna reassure anyone that you are not Tainted Forever for consuming a piece of media with questionable content. the fact that youre able to recognize it speaks to your critical thinking skills, which is good, certain depictions should be critiqued. but you dont need to ruminate on it to the point where you begin to feel guilty for simply witnessing gross or creepy writing choices. you dont have to vindicate yourself to the fictional tumblr discourser inside your head, saying that youre now a bad person bc you watched the wrong anime. your actual response to it still matters of course, but thats that and this is this. just seeing it is neutral, you didnt commit a thought crime. its literally fine.

[opheliawillowbrook]

How the Cookie Crumbles

To say his brothers fought would be an understatement: They warred. That. That was the better word. However, it was Dick who was the peacemaker among them. The mediator extraordinaire, translating all his brothers’ woes and misunderstandings into less doom-pending transgressions. But to say this unofficial, yet very necessary part he played was tasking was yet another understatement of unspeakable proportions. It was a FUCKING LOT.

“I swear to God, Drake. You and Brown are a special kind of stupid.”

“Shut up, Damian! It’s a good idea!” Tim grumbled in reply.

“Yeah! You’re just mad you didn’t think of it first!”

Dick’s face fell upon hearing the argument and considered turning the other way, but he’d learned the hard way that his lack of interference could result in bloodshed. Damian did have a history of stabbing Tim, and Robin had an impressive body count, according to Jason. I’d better  make sure he doesn’t add two more.

“Well, fuck me and my  entire life,” Dick droned in frustration. “What are you three bitching about now?”

“Damian keeps saying our idea is stupid,” Stephanie tattled.

“Yeah!” Tim added with crossed arms. “He says we lack the fortitude for good ideas!”

“You do!” the current robin exclaimed.

“Damian?”

The youngest batboy rolled his eyes and reasoned, “Listen, I know these two brain donors barely have two brain cells to rub between them—”

“That’s not the only thing they rub!” Jason called from the other room.

Damian again rolled his eyes in contempt and continued, “And I’ve accepted, as a member of this family, that everyone gets to act a little stupid from time to time. However, as much as I would like to respect their commitment to their shared stupidity, I feel as if they are abusing the privilege and it needs to stop before one of them gets hurt.”

“Wow, he actually cares,” Jason added from still in another room.

“Have you been sitting there listening the whole time?” Dick asked, near facepalm.

“Affirmative,” Jason confirmed, entering from the hall.

“And you did nothing to stop them fighting?”

“It’s funnier this way.”

“Do I always have to be the responsible one?”

“Affirmative,” all four said with little thought.

“Okay then,” Dick sighed with reluctance. “Damian, I know you find it hard to accept the choices of others, but you need to understand that free choice and expression is about accepting that others may not make the same choices as you, and that’s okay. It’s the same as you choosing not to take my dating advice and ask Raven out because you’re afraid of rejection—”

“Shut up, Grayson! This isn’t about me!!!” Damian spat.

“Damian has the hots for Raven?” Jason teased. “You have good taste, Mighty Mouse. She got a great—”

“Don’t even finish that sentence, Todd!” Dick and Damian ordered in unison.

“I was gonna say personality,” Jason droned. “Get your minds out of the gutter. I mean for fuck’ sake.”

“Sure you were,” Tim replied with a glower.

“Yeah Tim, cause you never stare at her tits while you talk to her,” Jason added, throwing him doubly under the bus.

“Dude, are you trying to get me killed?” Tim said, shooting an elbow into his brother’s ribs as Damian and Stephanie both glared. Spurring Dick into a further mood for murder.

“My point being is, just because you don’t like other peoples’ ideas, doesn’t mean they’re stupid.”

“Tell them the idea, guys!” Jason urged, stirring the pot.

Stephanie and Tim looked at each other and nodded, as though they’d discovered the holy grail itself. “We’re gonna write a series of YA novels and sell them on the web!” Steph sang optimistically.

“Yeah, it’s a huge and diverse market,” Tim added.

“And with established characters, we’ll make a killing.”

Dick’s brow furrowed. “That sounds like fanfiction?”

“It sounds like utter bullshit,” Damian sneered, not single fuck given.

“It’s not bullshit,” Tim snapped. “YA novels make up a huge portion of the market. People love those things.”

“Then name one YA novel that has sold more than a manga in the last 10 years?”

Tim shrugged. “I can’t think of one at the top of my head, but there they definitely exist and sell.”

“Yeah, so does my fanfiction based on this family,” Jason added under his breath.

“What?” Everyone asked.

“Nothing. Continue.”

“So anyway, I told Damian it’s a foolproof plan.”

Dick rolled his eyes with a bit of doubt, but who was he to judge or discourage their creativity. I mean, he dropped out of college after all? “I’m not saying I believe it’s bulletproof, because frankly, nothing is. But I’m curious why you would consider telling Damian? I mean, he hates most things.”

“And Drake. I hate Drake.”

“We’re all very aware, Dami,” Dick drawled in annoyance. “But yeah, why would you tell him anything important to you? Especially that?”

“Well, we kinda needed a loan. I knew Bruce would undoubtedly say no and, well, Damian has money.”

“Because I make good business decisions.”

“I don’t know why I thought of asking you?”

“You didn’t, Jason told you to,” Stephanie confessed, recalling an earlier conversation.

“Jason, really?” Dick tsked.

“Hey, Damian does make good business decisions. Who do you think cleans and invests money? It’s certainly not Alfred.”

“Because Alfred would have nothing to do with your blood money, Jason. And Damian, I’m very disappointed in you!”

“Grayson, I don’t know what high horse you are riding on today, but you better come off it. Father told me if I wanted money, that I needed to earn it and that I should get a job. So I got one.”

“Laundering money for Red Hood’s criminal Enterprise is not a job!”

“Actually it is. Mighty Mouse made us an LLC and everything. I own several Wash & Folds, all legitimate! Thanks to Hell Spawn here! I’m actually considering making him a partner.”

“So will your LLC fund our YA Novels?”

“Oh fuck no!”

“Come on, Jay! We have a solid business plan,” Stephanie pleased.

“You’re business plan is a bunch of meaningless numbers written on the back of a napkin and poorly illustrated versions of us,” Damian said, holding up the napkin in question.

“Okay, so it’s not the final draft, but we’re working on it!” Tim said pointedly.

“Yeah, as tempting as this all sounds, I didn’t make my money making half baked business decisions,” Jason reasoned

“No, you made it by taking over Gotham’s drug trade,” Dick clarified with disapproval.

“Which was a solid business decision.”

“Why do I even talk to you?”

“I don’t know why I talk to any of you,” Damian scowled, arms crossed, grateful there was no shared genetics between him and his adoptive kin. “I don’t understand what father saw in any of you.

“I can’t answer that,” Jason replied. “However, I can tell you, from personal experience, what he saw in your mom.”

“Do you wanna die, Todd?”

“Do you wanna not have a job?” Jason wanted. “Also, been there done that. But hey, if I died twice then I’d have buffy status so don’t threaten me with a good time, kid.”

“On that note, I’m leaving,” Damian grimaced. “I have to meet Raven, anyway.”

“Oh,” Dick sang. “You have a date!”

“It’s not a date.”

“Bet you wish it was a date,” Stephanie teased. “Y’know, if you just stopped acting like a dick all the time, I bet she’d go out with you.”

“Shut up, Brown.”

“Oh no,” Dick smiled. “I know it’s hard to believe, but he’s nice to Raven.”

“Hey keep that shit up,” Jason added. “If you’re nice to her, she’d be nice to you!”

“I hate all of you,” Damian proclaimed and stormed away.

“Fuck you too! See you at work Monday! Jason called, earning a tiger middle finger.

“He might be an asshole, but he’s a good kid,” Jason nodded with a sense of pride, causing to Dick to silently scoff. “Still needs to get laid though.”

“Bruce is gonna be so pissed when he finds out you pulled Dami into your bullshit.”

“You’re using Raven’s pet name for him now?” Jason mocked. “And fucker’s gonna have to prove it first; there’s a reason I hired ‘Dami’ for that job.”

“Dude, fuck you; dig your grave,” Dick lamented. “And don’t come at me with one of your tired ass death jokes, they’re getting old.”

“Suit yourself,” the Outlaw glowered as silence set in.

“So Dick,” Tim dared sheepishly. “You, um, wanna invest in--”

“Absolutely not,” the elder hero replied.

Leaving Jason to chuckle. “And that’s the way the cookie crumbled.”

If you enjoyed that feel free to leave me kudos 👉 here on Ao3 lol. If you have any remdom prompts send them my way; maybe I’ll feel inspired 😘

[exalok]

1, 24, and 35!!

ah!!!! (under the cut after the first because it got Very Long)

1. What font do you write in? Do you actually care or is that just the default setting?

i've taken to writing in calibri (after a period of testing comic sans) because it's round and pleasing and large and helps my brain not think This Is Serious Business Mistakes Are Punishable By Death (so yes i do care) but also i write quite a lot on discord so in that case i just use the default, which works in a similar way

24. How much prep work do you put into your stories? What does that look like for you? Do you enjoy this part or do you just want to get on with it?

oh god oh god. well i guess it depends on what your idea of prep work is, and on the story. there are stories i will hash out a couple of scenes for (basically let the movie run in my head and take notes on dialogue and movement and position in the room/on the furniture and inner thought and possibly on occasion actual descriptions i'd like to use) then, during the typing phase, add in about 70% of the actual finished thing on improv, based on what feels right in terms of progression/setup/getting the characters where they need to be and also on the various ideas that will pop up as i go. there are stories i will have scene plans and chapter plans and extra character info and mapped-out arcs and This Is What I Want From The Story files for, and all of it will change three to ten times along the course of the writing/rewriting (generally these are the long ones, which are much harder to keep in my head as a whole, so i need written notes to keep track of the things i would otherwise just be aware of in some corner of my mind). i very rarely research and when i do i tend to discard what i need the research for anyway because the first try always sticks out like a sore information thumb. lastly, i am incapable of not writing five sentences in my head to every one that reaches the page, which makes for very slow writing but decent initial results (and even now i do this less than i used to -- in the past i'd basically never edit beyond surface typo/tense checks because i'd already put So Much into trying to get the right sentence down the first time. writing is much more fluid, though less poetic, since i've learned to calm that instinct down) i cannot function without prep work!!!! or like i can't finish a story without prep work. i have somehow managed to write 50k words once with barely any prep but what i'd invent as i went (though it very quickly acquired a lot of stuff to keep track of) and started a number of stories without thinking very hard about them (then stopped when i started thinking Super Hard about them and got overwhelmed by all the Not Knowing What Happens Next) but everything i've finished is something i've prepped, and to be honest i really like it. it clarifies things, it's satisfying. sometimes i kind of want to publish my notes as-is even though without some idea of the end result they very well may be incomprehensible, because i still keep half the information in my brain without meaning to. (the number of times i've returned to an old fic and squinted at my notes like what the fuck did past me mean by that. ugh.) also making brain movies is half the fun of fanfictioning. however i have frequently gotten stuck on the reworking-the-chapter-plan part of the story and that can get very frustrating, so sometimes i do look at my dumptruck of a fic file and think i should just start putting words down or i'll never leave the rut

35. What’s your favorite writing rule to smash into smithereens?

an excellent question, as most of the writing rules i've encountered i have either forgotten or fully integrated over time, by which i mean i don't know -- i guess it's not something i consider or think about? i'll take into account things like how a sentence sounds in my head, whether a visual image makes my dopamine centers wiggle, a character's thoughts and their gradual progression through whatever journey i'm inflicting on the day's victim, but as most of the words kind of come to me naturally/automatically, beyond my systematic rewording of everything for the right Vibe, i just let the writing happen and don't think about what's Allowed or Not Allowed except for the every sentence has several uses rule. if i want a sentence because i think it's pretty, into the soup it goes. if two years down the line i reread that fic and decide it actually serves no purpose and the sense of pretty has run its course, then out it will go, but until then i'm throwing whatever i can get my hands on into the pot (oh yeah and i pop adverbs like they're seeds and i'm a hungry hungry bird) writing is weird!! writing is wonderful!! there is a voice in every silly little writer's hand!! you lego the words together into something pleasing and you lego the sentences together into something pleasing and you lego the scenes together into something pleasing and you have, hopefully, something that pleases you at the end, and maybe it will reveal Deep Thoughts about the world and society and people and what they do and maybe it will relieve Deep Feelings in somebody somewhere and maybe it will just be Deeply Stupid and allow the shutting off of brains and the producing of mental fizz i dunno. my point i guess is Writing Delicious the rule i want to smash the most is the one that says i should take myself seriously

[filipinoizukuu]

I saw your post about the FA's translations, and I totally agree. Sometimes, when they do not translate accurately, is to make it sound better or cooler in English, but it just ends up taking away a lot from the context and characters. We know how one of the most affected character interpretations is Katsuki's, a main character, no less. And Izuku and Katsuki's relationship too, which is something super super wrong, considering is deeply intertwined with the main plot of the series, thus if someone misinterpreted their dynamic, this person would miss a bigass chunk of the message the story has.

Here is the panel you mentioned before btw

I remember when I read this, only 10 or 11 chapters into the manga (?), and I was like "...I'm...pretty sure this guy didn't say that" khshsjdhs

OK FIRST OF ALL LMAO HELLO MANG!! THANK YOU SO MUCH AND DW ABOUT IT I TOTALLY GET WHAT YOU MEAN !!

(this is your warning for a long post ahead!)

In any case, I still think you're very correct on this! Not to ramble a bit, but Horikoshi's particular talent in developing the plot of MHA is actually very very brilliant and there are a lot of blink-and-you'll-miss-it details that together, assemble the big picture of what MHA is.

Translations are such an integral part of being able to understand foreign media. MHA or otherwise. The simplest of details say a lot about a character and often times make or break a series because everyone knows that strong character dynamics are what carry even the shittiest of plots.

First and foremost, I want to clarify that because of the nature of fan translations and the fact that most of it is volunteer work/ written out of pure enjoyment of the manga--we shouldn't judge these fan translators too harshly (if at all) for interpreting it the way they want to. FA, as far as I can tell, is a fan-based group that works out of donations.

The first thing I wanna bring up is that when it comes to fandom and its works, there are two types: Curatorial and Transformative. Now, the transformative part is something that must be very familiar to a lot of you. Fanfiction, fanart, and most headcanons fall under Transformative Works (i.e. AO3) because they are all about transforming the canon world to fit each individual's personal preferences. Meta-analysis posts and Character Breakdowns are also classified under this.

Curatorial on the other hand are fandom interactions made with the explicit purpose of being as close to canon material as possible. This is working out the logic of quirks, for example, or memorizing as much canon content about your favorite villain as possible. These are more cold, hard undeniable facts that lend themselves to the DIRECT VISION the creator/author had while making this media. If you were to ask me my opinion on this, this would be the moment where I tell you that the Curatorial side of fandom is where fan translations should (for the most part) fall under.

What people need to know though is that oftentimes, fan translations do not.

Translating isn't and has never been a one-is-to-one process. There are hundreds of thousands of aspects in a language that make it so that it isn't perfectly translatable. Colloquialisms to sayings to dialects, to just plain-out words that don't have a proper English translation to them! Manga is made by and for a Japanese audience, so obviously in a lot of instances, there will be cultural nuances that will not be understood by anyone who hasn't immersed themselves in Japanese culture/language.

So what does this mean then for fan scanlations?

It means that a vast majority of translators teach themselves to only get the essence of the message. They take the dialogue as they understand it and translate it to something of their interpretation. When language and cultural barriers exist, translators do what they can in order to make it understandable to the general populace. This means making their own executive decisions on how they see a character speaking. In example, if they see Todoroki using very direct and impersonal Japanese--one translator might interpret it to mean that Shouto is stiff and overly formal, while another may see it as him being rude and aloof.

The problem is, translators are fans just like us.

Like with the image Mang posted above, the translator based the usage of curse words off of their understanding of Bakugou's character. The lack of foul language in the original Japanese might have made the translator think "Oh. There just aren't enough Japanese cusses for his character." And took that as an initiative to make Bakugou's lines more colorful and violent because this was working off of the image Bakugou had had at this point in canon.

But Codi! You may cry. Wasn't it proven multiple times that Bakugou prefers concise and short lines? They should've known better!

Yes. Maybe they should've known better. But tell me honestly in your first watch-through of MHA, did you perfectly understand Bakugou's character either? Did you catch the whole 'direct and no flowery language' aspect of his language when you first saw Season 2?

Most people don't. I only really understood this fact after I'd read multiple discussions of it and even double-checked the manga myself. These are the kinds of things that only become noticeable with a sharp eye and some time to scrutiny. But the fact of the matter is that when it comes to fan translations, the clout and recognition are always going to go to who can post the quickest.

Am I excusing erroneous translations? A bit, I guess. It's hard for us to go in and expect translators to catch all these errors before release when we ourselves only catch these errors like 4 months in with a hundred times more canon context than these scanlation groups did at the time of its release.

Still, there are plenty of harms that come with faulty translations.

When a translation is more divorced from the original's meaning than usual, it creates a dissonance between what is actually happening versus what the audience sees is happening. This looks like decently-written character arcs being overruled and rejected by most of the readers because of how 'jarring' and 'clumsy' it seems. By the time translators had caught on to the fact that Bakugou was more than just a ticking time bomb, we were already several steps into showing how significantly he cares for Deku.

The characters affected most by these translation errors are often those with the most subtle and well-written character arcs. A single mistake in how the source material is translated can make or break the international reception of a certain character to everyone who isn't invested enough in them to look deeper into the canon source.

It creates hiccups in plots. Things that seem out of character but really aren't. Going back to MHA in specific, the way that inaccurate translations hurt both the 'curatorial' and 'transformative' parts of the fandom is that people have begun to cite them as proof of the main cast's characterization.

Bakugou and Todoroki are undeniably some of the biggest examples of mistranslation injustices.

Katsuki, in a lot of people's minds, has yet to break out of the 'overly-aggressive rival' archetype box that people had been placing him in since Season 1. One of the most amazing aspects and biggest downfalls of Hori's writing was that at first, nearly every character fit into a very neat stereotype for Shonen Animes (Deku being the talking-no-jutsu sunshine MC, Uraraka being the overly bubbly main girl, Todoroki being the aloof and formal rival). He made the audience make assumptions about everyone's characters and then pulled the rug beneath our feet when he revealed deeper sides of them to play around within canon.

What made this part about Horikoshi's set-up so good though were the many clues we were given from the very beginning that these characters were more than what they acted like. Even from the very first chapters, for example, we learn that Katsuki (as much as he acts like a delinquent) dislikes smoking because it could get him in trouble.

That is just a single instance of MHA's use of dialogue to subtly divert our expectations of a character.

Another example is when they replaced 318's dialogue of the Second User saying that Katsuki "completes" Deku with him saying that Katsuki merely "bolsters" him. This presents a different situation, as that line was meant to reinforce the importance of those two's relationship as well as complete the character foils that MHA is partially centered around. By downplaying their developed connection, it becomes harder for the MHA manga scanlations to justify any future significance these two's words have on each other without mottling the pacing of the story.

AKA, it butchers the plot.

With every new volume, there are dozens and dozens more of these hints and bits scattered around! So many cues and subtle foreshadowing at the trajectory of everyone's character arcs--yet mistranslations or inaccurate scans make it so that we don't notice them. This is what I mean when I said that some character arcs are being done great injustices.

Until now, many people can't accept that Katsuki Bakugou cares for anyone other than himself (much less his rival and MC, Izuku Midoriya), nor can they accept that Todoroki would ever willingly work by Endeavor's side. The bottom-line then becomes that because of people missing heavy bits of characterization that become very plot-significant in the future.

When it comes to the point where people can no longer accept or fit their interpretation of the earlier manga events to what is happening in canon, the point of a translation fails completely because it has lead people to follow an entirely different story.

TL;DR - Fan scans are hard. Translating is hard. Don't get too mad at fan translations, but also maybe don't treat them as the catch-all for how characters truly operate. Thanks.

Side note: DO NOT harass FA for any of these things. FA is actually a pretty legit and okay source for scans (they've been operating since like 2014 ffs), but regardless of that they still don't deserve to get flack for their work. You can have any opinion or perspective of canon that you want, I don't care. These are just my two (more like two million tbh) cents on translations. I suggest reading takes from actual Japanese audiences tbh if you wanna know more about the source material of MHA. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[hispydamy618]

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power x Spaceling: Glitch in Space

Summary: After opening the portal, it tears a hole across the dimensions giving an entrance for the New York heroes: Utopix Jones, Georgine Wilson, Gabriel Rodriguez, Oliver Schmidt and Makena Jones, to fall right through. Together, they'll need to recreate the disaster that brought them to Etheria alongside the Princess' Rebellion in order to go back home and fix what was broken... but not before defeating the obstacles on the way.

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers for She-Ra’s season 3 finale and Spaceling’s issue 10-12 events.

(Thank you so much to @catlliecal​ for co-writing this with me!)

Masterlist: Chapter 1 // Chapter 2 (you’re here!) // Chapter 3 // Chapter 4 // Chapter 5 // Chapter 6 // Chapter 7

Word Count: 3.0k

Check Spaceling out!

Chapter 2: Trail of Light

"And then we went through the portal and- BOOM! All white, no noise." Gabriel dramatically reenacted their arrival. Bow was simply mesmerized by it, unlike Glimmer and Adora, but it was something that they've gotten used to.

"He's not... smart, is he?" Adora leaned near Glimmer's ear and whispered her concern.

"You're all from another dimension!?" Bow's eyes seemed to form stars. "You might have gotten here after what happened with-" Adora placed a hand on his shoulder to prevent him from speaking any longer. "...after something that happened here."

"Seems like it." Georgine crossed her arms over the metal plate on her chest. "What is this place exactly?"

"You're on Etheria. You never heard of it?" Bow shook his head at the last sentence.

"Should I?" Georgine's hand rested on Utopix's hip who was sitting on her lap for safe measure.

"Georgine! I-I'm so sorry, Your Majesty. Georgine is a little bit... stubborn on foreign grounds," Makena apologized to Glimmer who was holding her father's staff at all times, giving the clear impression that she was royalty.

"It's okay. We just wanna know one thing," Glimmer pointed the staff at them, holding it with both hands to avoid it from slipping off. "Are you from the Horde?"

"The Horde? Are we supposed to know what that means too?" Georgine interfered again.

"Your Majesty..." Oliver softly spoke, catching Glimmer's attention at his addressing. "We- I think that.. whatever happened here, it's what brought us here. If you gimme enough material, I'm sure I can find a way to recreate whatever brought us here and-"

Glimmer stomped her staff on the floor, creating a loud sound to catch their attention. "Recreate!? That... THING nearly killed us all if it wasn't for..." Tears began to form on her eyes, keeping her head low to avoid the others from looking. "Y-You are to stay in our sights, until we find out how to get you back home. Dismissed." Her voice trailed off at her last wish, going back to her room and out of the strangers' sights.

"I-I... I'm sorry. Did we say something?" Utopix stood up, making Georgine scoot forward to analyze his next move.

Adora's breath shook at his question, but after regaining whatever strength she had in her, she answered his inner doubts. "Glimmer's mom... Queen Angela... she..." her palm wiped the sudden tears, feeling it all play again in her head. Bow stood near his friend, caressing her shoulders and speaking for her. Utopix's heart sinked on their actions, knowing perfectly what it meant.

"She sacrificed herself to save us all from Etheria being destroyed by a portal that the Horde created. It... hasn't been that long." Bow lowered his head, sighing in defeat.

Utopix didn't know why he also started shredding tears. Maybe because he related to their pain in a deeper level. "I-I understand... M-My mom... also- k-kinda..."

Once Georgine noticed Utopix's voice dragging off, she quickly stood up, embracing him as much as she could to prevent him from crying. "It's okay, baby," she sweetly whispered in his ear as he began sobbing.

"Did something similar happened to you?" Bow's eyebrows furrowed, imagining the same scenario.

"His mom helped him escape his planet from an evil queen months ago. He landed in our... province by accident, but she followed him and we've trying to defeat her ever since." Gabriel explained to the best of his ability. "He isn't sure, but he thinks that his mom... might be gone. But we are gonna be here for him even if it isn't true."

Bow glanced at Adora whom had finished wiping her tears to exchange a quick smile. "We'll try to help you get back home, but we may have to fill you in a few things."

Gabriel's eyes sparkled as he squeezed Oliver's arm in excitement. "They're gonna tell us more about their planet."

"I don't think I got your names," Bow smiled at them, attempting to lighten the mood a little. "I'm Bow, and this is Adora."

"I'm Gabriel! Master of Illustration and Poetry!" Gabriel posed as if he was a superhero of some kind.

"Fanfiction isn't poetry, Gabriel." Oliver interfered.

"That's what you think!"

Makena stood up, chuckling at their comments. "I'm Makena, and this is Oliver. That's Georgine, as you know already. And Utopix. An artificex, a robot species."

"A robot!? Like- from space?" Bow nearly squeaked.

"Is that why the Queen is following him?" Adora crossed her arms, taking a closer inspection at Utopix.

"No, no, no. You see- they are all robots. But the Queen wants him dead because his family committed treason against the Queen!" Gabriel commented once again. "Isn't that exciting?"

"Uhh..." Adora awkwardly smiled. "Bow, does this make sense to you?"

"Absolutely," he nodded in approval.

After hours of explaining and exchanging adventures, though avoiding the word of She-Ra for safe measure, they had finally begun setting in their guest rooms. "Utopix can stay in Glimmer's room and Georgine can stay in the-" Adora begun assigning their rooms but was interrupted by Georgine's sudden handling.

"I don't think so," she held Utopix close to her body. "I'm not going to leave Utopix near that... thing."

"You mean Shadow Weaver?" Adora whispered, wanting to avoid to summon her in any way possible. "Look- I get it. I don't trust her that much either, but you don't have to wo-"

"I appreciate your concern, Adurhra-"

"Adora," she grunted.

"Adora."  Georgine's eyes narrowed at her semi confrontation. "But if something happens to him-"

"I can assure you that he'll be okay."

"Under what grounds, Adora?" Georgine stepped forward, meaning to establish her position and territory in front of the other tan-haired girl. "Because so far it seems like you and your friends can't seem to handle problems."

"You'd be surprised of what we can do together."

"Like what? Putting others in dangers for the sake of survival?"

Adora's body stood still at her words, letting Utopix know that he needed to interfere. "G-Georgie... S-Stop it."

Once Georgine felt Utopix's hands upon hers, she allowed her body to feel more loose, kissing his hand before retiring to a place far away from the individual she found suspicious.

"...A-Adora, I'm so sorry. I-I've barely have known Georgine for some months, but I don't know why she's so... harsh at times."

"No, I'm- used to it. I used to think like that a long time ago. Plus, I don't blame her. Being suddenly trapped in a place that you don't know can be... annoying."

Utopix lowered his head in disappointment. "I-I understand if you're upset, Adora."

"Oh, no, no!" she waved her arms around, clarifying the misunderstanding that the one in front of her had. "You're... uhh... great." Adora awkwardly chuckled, letting her hands rest upon her hips.

"Thank you," Utopix returned the welcoming smile, leaving her to her inner delight to find Georgine.

=================

"Why do we have to do his dirty work again?"

"Come on, Catra. Don't look at this as a bad thing! Think of it as a chance for us to have a bonding experience!"

"Whatever keeps you sane, I guess."

Catra smacked a tree branch down as she and Scorpia were wandering through the woods. Apparently Hordak had detected some sort of huge energy reading over at Bright Moon and decided to make Catra's life even more annoying by sending her and Scorpia to check it out. She had smack talked him earlier, saying how if he found it so super important that he should go check it out,  but he couldn't resist weaponizing her last failure, twisting this mission into a chance to "redeem herself" or some bullshit like that. There wasn't much she could do against that, so she grabbed Scorpia and stormed out of the Fright Zone before Hordak could utter another peep.

The branch decided to add salt to the wound by flinging itself right back at her. Catra was thrown back a bit by the impact, landing onto the ground with all the grace of a new born gazelle. "Let me help you up," Scorpia held her hand out.

Catra let out an annoyed growl before reluctantly accepting the help. She could have gotten up just fine, but the last thing she needed was another thing for Scorpia to be moping about.

"You wonder how Entrapta is doing?" Scorpia asked.

"Probably struggling to survive, if I had to guess." Catra ducked under the branch this time.

"She's smarter than that, don'tcha think?" Scorpia countered. "I mean, you saw all the tech she made for the Horde. She's probably managed to build some sort of super amazing device to help her tame the beasts!"

"No one who gets sent to Beast Island manages to last for long," Catra stated. "Whenever a trainee would slip up a lot, they'd get threatened to be sent off to the Island as a punishment for their failures. Once you get sent there, you don't come back."

Kinda like Adora after encountering that stupid magic sword.

"I guess you have point..." Scorpia sighed. She went silent after that. Good. One less thing to get on Catra's nerves.

The two continued in silence, twisting and turning around the trees; Catra didn't want to deal with any more branches wacking back at her. As much as she wanted to stop and just relax away from Hordak and any other bothersome Horde leaders, she wanted to get this stupid mission over first. Besides, she could relax once Hordak was off her back. She knew all the nooks and crannies of the Fright Zone like the back of her hand.

The clearing finally ended, and the way too sparkly Bright Moon finally was in sight. Catra chose to weave around the edge of the forest, not wanting to get caught by any Moon guards. The last thing she needed was more hell to deal with.

She heard some footsteps and quickly ducked behind the trees, pulling Scorpia's massive body next to her so she wouldn't blow their cover.

"What's going on?" Scorpia whispered.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out, genius. Now stay quiet or you'll get us caught!"

Catra turned in the direction of the footsteps. She saw one person with a sweep of dirty blond hair covering one side of their head, the other side shaved. There appeared to be piercing on their ears. Next to them, there was someone with short, black hair along with strange bright green marks under their eyes.

"Who are they?" Scorpia asked, placing her head on top of Catra's, letting out a single gasp. "Is that Adora's twin? I can't handle two of them, let alone, one!"

"No clue. But whoever they are, they made things a lot more interesting."

Maybe there was something to gain out of this journey.

Moments had gone by, and Georgine's mind had wondered off elsewhere. It hadn't been hours since they crashed into the harmless dimension and her discomfort grew stronger wherever she went. But she was clearly not paying attention to her surroundings, despite how beautiful they were to the human eye.

"Georgie?" Utopix's fingers caressed her clenched fist, his voice sweetly trailed into her ears, snapping her back to reality. "It's okay. We'll get back home soon." His reassurance was misplaced, but it was still genuine.

"That's not what I'm worried about, hun."

"I-I don't think Adora and the others want to hurt us. They all seem really nice."

"It's not her who I'm concerned about, Uto." Georgine's eyes glanced around the castle, placing Utopix between her and the balcony's fence. "It's that... lady." She looked down at Shadow Weaver from the balcony they were standing at.

"I-I thought it was Takara at first... It scared me."

"I'm just curious as to why they have her around just like that," she let out a long disappointed sigh. "Just... stay near me, okay?"

"And you try to be more nice to them," Utopix's eyebrows furrowed upon his request.

"Hey." Georgine felt offended on his sudden comment.

"I-I mean it, Georgie. They let us stay here and... I can tell that they've gone through a lot... just like we have."

Georgine's eyes slightly rolled around, but after reconsidering her motifs, she accepted. "Fine."

"Plus, this place looks gorgeous! I wonder what's beyond it!"

"Fine, fine. Maybe we can go together."

Adora's eyes laid on the pair of lovebirds as a slight grin adorned her face. Interactions of this kind reminded her of a time she spent with a certain grouchy cat back on the Horde. But she wanted to keep her mind off of things... not after what happened.

"Ugh!" Mermista's voice groaned as usual after Adora and Bow explained what had happened. "Why can't we just have a normal day for once?"

"Well, I think it's wonderful!" Perfuma's hands happily clapped together.

Frosta's expression scrunched as she stared at Adora and Georgine multiple times, clearly making them uncomfortable, but what could they expect from a 11-and-three-quarters-child. Suddenly, a gasp escaped her mouth, making them back away. "Are you TWINS!?"

"Frosta! Come on!" Adora roared at her expression. "She looks nothing like me."

"Tsk." Georgine crossed her arms upon her chest.

Gabriel was hit by another epiphany. "What if we're here because she's your lost twin and destiny has brought you together!?"

"Gabriel! Come on!" Georgine similarly roared at the other's comment.

"Yeah, sure. Noooooo similar at all." Mermista rolled her eyes, laying against her tall chair with little care.

"We just need to infiltrate into the Horde to find some tech for Oliver to create a small portal for them to go back to their dimension." Bow explained as he displayed said plan on the giant holographic screen. "He knows what to do to avoid it from becoming unsteady, so we have to be careful when we go there."

"I'll go!" Utopix raised his hand like a kindergarten kid.

"No, my love." Georgine kissed his forehead, raising his chin to let him meet her eyes. "I need you to stay here with Makena and the other princesses. We'll just be in and out."

"But... y-you asked me to stay near you."

Georgine lowly chuckled at his comeback, sending chills down his sensitive spine. "Not in this situation, my love."

"Okay, so-" Glimmer swiped the screen to a red toned one. "Adora, Georgine, Bow, and I will be in Team A. Team B will be Gabriel, Mermista and-"

"Ugh!" Mermista interrupted with her whining. "Not those sewers again."

Glimmer's eye twitched at her reaction and after a single exhale got back to explaining. "Gabriel, Mermista and Oliver will be Team B to help him get the supplies. Team A will help distract the Horde long enough for Team B to go unnoticed. Perfuma and Frosta will stay here with Utopix and Makena in case the Horde decides to do any sudden attacks during our absence. In the meantime-"

"Did somebody said Swift Wind?" Swift Wind's hair marvelously waved around as he barged into the room and the meeting.

Gabriel nearly lost all of the breath in his lung once he contemplated the mystical creature. "It's a- I-It's a-!" He gasped multiple times before collapsing into Oliver's arms.

Swift Wind huffed as he approached the table. "...Okay- uh... who let him in?" His ears perked up once he saw Adora and Georgine together. "Oh. My. Goodness. Adora! You-!"

"We are not twins!" Adora and Georgine exclaimed in unison.

"Yeah." Swift Wind scoffed, smirking at their common response. "Pff. Sure."

"That's what I was saying!" Frosta pouted like the child she was, crossing her arms to add onto her passive anger.

"If you're not twins, then I am not the oh-so-loyal and gorgeous steed of She-!" Adora shut his giant mouth and shushed him, preventing him from revealing their secret, but it wasn't enough for Georgine to begin raising suspicions about her.

Night finally fell upon Etheria, allowing everyone inside the Bright Moon castle to finally rest. Glimmer was still helping Utopix accommodate the bed to his liking. Her fists would gently fluff the pillows, delicately placing them on the bed near the window. "A-Are you sure it's okay for Georgine and me to sleep in your room?" Utopix asked, holding one of the pillows near him.

"Yeah, don't worry! It'll be fun to sleep with Adora and Bow! A Best Friends Squad sleepover!"

Utopix sweetly giggled at the name of her gang. But after sitting near the edge of that bed, that same smile quickly faded away. "...I-I'm sorry about your mom."

Glimmer's hands stopped fixing the bed. Tears beginning to form on the corner of her eyes. Her saddened expression laid upon him, observing his timid behavior act up once again.

"I-I know it must be hard hearing it... but I... I-I lost mine, too." Utopix begun to shred tears, quietly sobbing to himself. "S-She.. also saved me from something... but I-I miss her..."

Glimmer let out a single sob before wiping the small tears that threatened to roll down her face. "I miss mine too... but they'd both want us to be strong. To live." The purple princess sat near the robot, placing a hand upon his cheek in a desperate attempt to comfort him. "And we can not let both of their sacrifices go to waste." Her constant-sparkling purple eyes gazed into the tiniest sparkle within his, her hand still resting ceaselessly on his tender cheek. "So, let's live. For them."

Utopix's eyes were filled by tears once again at the sound of her words. "Oh, G-Glimmer..." His body squeezed hers into a tight hug, her arms returning the pleasant gesture to the other, gently caressing his back as he cried his heart out. After there were no tears left to cry, they gently let go of each other and exchanged a warm smile amongst them.

"Hey. How about we go for some ice cream? That always cheers me up!" Glimmer happily suggested.

"C-Can we?" Utopix wiped his tears away, letting out a giggle on the process.

"Of course! I can easily teleport there so there's no problem!"

Their sweet laughs made Georgine smile who was leaning against the door frame, unnoticed.

Yet, thousands of miles away, Catra had delivered the news to Hordak, alerting him of the two strangers for good measure. She could have kept it to herself, but she didn't want him stepping on her toes any longer... not after finding someone more valuable to her own use.

...Otu.

[sugarandspice-games]

I guess this is becoming a trend... I’m popping in before the actual intro to clarify-- if the text is in italic, it is me (Sugar) talking and regular is Spice. Alright? Cool. And so--

So, one night I’m going through youtube and I come upon this one shitposty video about some random anime that I’ve never even heard of. After doing some research, I discover that it’s actually based on a dating sim that I’ve also never heard of. As a joke I was like “Hey Sugar wanna watch this as a joke, it might be funny” and so we did. And uhm. Well.

Today we’re gonna be reviewing Brothers Conflict, aka Sweet Home Alabama 2: Electric Anime Boogaloo aka the anime that ruined our lives. [Again, disclaimer: neither Sugar nor I condone incest and/or pedophilia, two themes which are uh, very rampant in this anime which is why I cannot recommend it in good faith. It’s not good, don’t get me wrong. I can’t really say that I liked it even if watching it and ragging on it was kind of enjoyable, and I did get attached to some of the characters because that’s the kind of idiot I am. Also, we’re not shirking our duties to write I swear please don’t kill me--] Anyway, an obligatory SPOILER WARNING though this probably isn’t going in the main tag bc I do not want the fans to publicly stone me. Why are we reviewing this? Bc we need to talk about it somewhere. Though I say review lightly bc this... is really more of a critique.

ALSO we only watched the anime, idk if things are different in the game. There is no full english translation for the games and most of the LP channels have been copyright striked, so please don’t come at us for not knowing anything. I also know that otome games and dating sims don’t tend to translate well to anime, and I will be addressing this later.

So, dear god, where do I begin.

Where do we begin indeed? How about the fact that her name is Ema and I had to google to remember the heroine’s name? Also, she is seventeen.

Our plot, or well... what you COULD call a plot, I guess, if you REALLY wanted to give this anime that much credit, focuses on the aforementioned seventeen year old Hinata Ema, who has an absent father who apparently FOUND THE TIME TO FALL IN LOVE AND GET MARRIED BUT NEVER HAS A SECOND TO SPARE FOR HIS ONLY CHILD, RINTARO I SWEAR TO GOD I AM TAKING CUSTODY OF YOUR CHILD. HAND HER OVER-- Anyway. He’s getting married to a woman who has 13 sons (jesus christ ma’am have you ever heard of a condom?) and he decides to move her in with them because... I guess he has less braincells than I have balls, which is to say, zero. Hi, I’m trans.

So, Ema moves in with them... along with her talking grey squirrel, Juli. Juli is... interesting and by interesting, I mean-- ABSOLUTELY PUZZLING. He, apparently, has seen the majority of Ema’s life from babyhood to teenagerhood and can talk but is only understood by Ema (who he calls Chii) and Louis, the eighth son in the Asahina family. It is never explained why, or how Chii came across him or how in an episode, a single episode, he becomes human because why the hell not, I guess??? (Also, he is pretty. YES. I said it. Fight me.) [Quick Spice intervention, this squirrel can talk to people, transform into a human, enter dreams, and live way longer than a squirrel should since the average lifespan of a squirrel is like 6 years in the wild. Juli is apparently a god as none of this is EVER explained.]

And when she meets the Asahina family, it’s pretty much immediately chaos because these heterosexual (I guess? They look like a bunch of twinks to me but there goes anime trying to convince me that straight people are real and not a lie made up by Trump) men have NEVER and I mean NEVER known a woman in their entire lives, since they seem to want to bang their stepsister immediately. And most of them are GROWN ASS ADULTS. Only three of them are actually minors (though Iori is 18 and only one year older so I guess??? It’s okay??? But still weird) and one of them is a 13 year old who looks and acts like he’s 8.

Oh, and did I mention that out of these boys, only the adult triplets and the abusive asshole 16 year old get any kind of characterization AND character development? I mean, Subaru gets an “arc” if you can call it that, but really, they don’t give him much... personality. You could replace him with a cardboard cutout and it’d be the same. I feel bad for him (but not really because dude you are 20 and she is your sister, what the fuck--)

But if there’s anything good about this anime, it is the characters themselves. Several of the boys have redeeming qualities and interesting personalities and quirks, as well as interesting relationships and dynamics with each other. Yes, some of them are lacking in the plotline department while others may have decent plotlines and lack personality, and then some of them are just given absolutely nothing (COUGH Masaomi COUGH Ukyo COUGHCOUGHCOUGH Iori, and by the way, what the fuck is that game plotline bc I read the wiki since I wanted to know more about him. We don’t have time to unpack the mento illness luv. But you’re telling me they had all this meat to work with and they threw it in the trash and gave him nothing? What the hell?) And if anything, I feel as if the characters themselves are crippled by the plotline. If given a different story, perhaps, they may have room to shine, because a lot of them are compelling if not lovable (though some may not be... lovable. COUGHFuuto, at least not for me.) If you want to see our review on the characters, we’ll put out another post.

Iori... Iori has a hell of a plot in the game, according to the Wiki but I can’t blame the writers for not exploring all of it because whoa. It is dark and not in a good way. But back to the subject at hand... I agree with Spice. I do/did like quite a lot of the characters... provided the entire romantic plot is taken away but we will go into more of why the plot is problematic below. All I can really add is: There is a baby in this dumpster and canon has been taken out back to be shot like a lame horse.

This brings me to a point in which I would like to pause the character discussion and bring up a glaring flaw with this anime in general (aside from the... plot. Look, I’m not a huge fan of weird stepsibling stuff but I think that if you want to do something like that, there are ways to do it and ways not to do it. This was the way not to do it, which I’m getting to). The biggest thing that made this anime so uncomfortable was the imbalance of power dynamics. Why is the protagonist 17 when most of the love interests are 18 and older, and I mean much, much older? And she’s not any 17 year old... she’s a lonely, neglected girl who is starved for the love of a family. This makes her easily manipulated by the brothers, who clearly desire her for less than wholesome reasons, and that makes it skeevy. I’m not sure why there’s such a fetishization of nonconsent in media, as if it’s fine for as many men to lust after female protagonists as the writer desires BUT the woman can’t want a single one of them in return. It’s creepy, and quite frankly, I am very much over it. I also get that the age thing is probably a product of the protagonist of a teenager oriented dating sim not translating well to an anime (because really, all otome game MCs are meant to be a neat little pair of shoes for the player to imagine themselves in), but why are we fetishizing a teenager being groomed by adults anyway? Especially adults who have this much power over her to begin with? The power dynamics bring this plot from “Oh, this might be kinda trashy but it could be entertaining” to “This is extremely creepy and rapey and kind of a dumpster fire.”

This is also true. If we were to take age into consideration, Fuuto, Yusuke, and Iori would be the three candidates left for Chii. This is taking out the youngest as well, who is... thirteen, I think? But anyway, (I know I am probably going to get some hate for this but go for it), I am into stories that explore the stepsibling thing and it can make a good narrative-- but before everyone gets uppity: There is a line between FICTION and REALITY and I do not condone real life incest but a story is a story and there are ways to frame it that make it clear that it is not a romantic thing, or acceptable. This anime does not do that in it’s dynamics because some of the brothers do start off in that very firm caregiving, family role and it is a sharp turn into romance that makes you go, “?” or in Fuuto case, a blending that does lean into fetishization.

All in all I think the plot maybe could have been okay? I’m not saying it isn’t problematic, because we all know it is, who are we kidding? But I don’t think it’s wrong per se to explore family dynamics with romance and to understand where the line should be drawn, and maybe exploring the definition of family itself. I have seen fanfictions with similar tropes ask those questions and explore the concept beautifully without romanticizing or fetishizing incest and unhealthy power dynamics. It could have been good, and I get that perhaps I’m barking up the wrong tree by expecting mature themes in an anime based on an otome game, but it also could have been a lot less... creepy (I have used that word so much that it looks wrong now) even if it wasn’t the greatest thing ever. But again, what was I expecting? I watched this whole thing as a joke and ended up attached to the characters like a fool... That tends to be a trend here, and this is why we are so salty all the time. So anyway, stay tuned for our review of the characters! We may not cover all of them since some of them don’t really get anything, but we’ll cover what we found interesting.

[gb-fics]

Peshimizumu

Fanfiction:

Kiryuuin Shou x Kyan Yutaka (Golden Bomber)

Note: Not surprisingly, this fic is for the song “Peshimizumu” XD I wrote a lot of gloomy, brooding Shou lately, so now you get a happy, fluffy one.

„Then …“, Shou said and raised his index finger into the air as if asking for attention. He had long, slender fingers that did not match with the rest of his short, stocky body. The contrast made his hands look even sexier somehow.

“I leaned out of the window and waved back”, Shou added and paused, seemingly for dramatic effect.

He stared at Yutaka in an obviously tipsy fashion. Yutaka did not mind. He was tipsy himself.

Shou spread his arms widely in a grant gesture.

Luckily, they were sitting in a separated section, where he couldn’t hit anyone by accident. Large gatherings were still prohibited, but this bar close to Yutaka’s apartment had come up with a nice solution. Yutaka found himself enjoying the privacy of their own booth more than sharing a large room with strangers.

“And that”, Shou concluded. “Was the most social interaction I had for an entire week.”

Yutaka burst out laughing.

Shou broke into a wide smile that looked happy and proud, as if he was glad that his story had made Yutaka laugh. His mouth looked big and wide when he smiled like that. The gaps between his teeth were such a natural part of his smile after all those years, that Yutaka hardly noticed them. He just noticed that Shou looked adorable when he smiled like this.

“So, you are telling me, the most social interaction you had for an entire week”, Yutaka repeated, still trying to catch his breath. “Was waving at a … dog?!”

Shou burst into a full laugh now as well. He was very pale, but red dots were showing on his cheeks. He wasn’t blushing where most people blushed, but rather close to his nose. It looked very cute. Yutaka thought that it was cute, that Shou laughed at his own story, if you told it back at him, too.

“I waved back!”, he clarified. “The dog raised its pawn and it was really fucking adorable.”

Still grinning Shou shook his head and took up his glass again. He drank in large gulps.

Yutaka had always noticed that Shou had a very manly way of drinking. He couldn’t explain it any better. Shou took large, soundly gulps, holding on to the glass as if it was a stone, he wanted to use to bash someone’s head in. Usually, his way of drinking would not have sparked Yutaka’s interest at all. But it did not match up with Shou’s hunched over way of sitting and the awkward way he moved as if not knowing where to leave his arms and his way of touching things, which was normally quite gentle. Shou drank like a man much more confident than himself.

Shou sat his glass back down soundly.

“Those were some dark weeks”, he said.

Shou could be pretty closed off and quiet and at those times, it was impossible to figure out what he was thinking at all. Alcohol did not change that. If Shou was in a bad mood, he was unable to hide it. The alcohol only caused him to turn more obviously sulky.

But if Shou was happy, it was nearly impossible to shut him up. He would babble on for hours and he would be all smiles and embarrassed laughter and his cheeks would flush and there wasn’t a thing Yutaka wouldn’t do to protect him when he was like that.

Tonight, Shou was clearly a happy drunk.

“I was so fed up with the inside of my own apartment, I’m happy to go out again”, Shou said. “Into the sun! I usually hate the sun! It’s so hot in the sun and I always get sunburned. But dude, I missed the sun. I also missed people!”

Shou paused again and leaned in, holding Yutaka’s gaze conspiratorial for a moment. Without colour contacts, Shou’s eyes were small and incredible dark. Yutaka could not make out his pupil from where he was sitting. Shou’s eyes looked black, but not in a menacing way. The black always looked warm, even on the days when he was sulking.

“And you know how I usually feel about people”, Shou added.

Yutaka burst out laughing again. That was another thing he liked about happy Shou – he was good humoured and very charming.

“I would have thought the lockdown was just the right thing for you. You don’t like going out to spend money or to socialize with people anyway”, Yutaka observed.

Shou leaned back again and snorted quietly.

“Right?”, he asked. “I’m such a negative person. I don’t like anything on the outside. But if I have to stay inside, I don’t like that either. I guess it’s just my personality.”

Yutaka chuckled, but brushed it off with a movement of his arm.

“Not at all”, he protested. “You are the most positive person I know. Look at you. Even if you hate those things, you manage to get all excited about them. Like sunlight. Only a very positive person would get excited about finally getting a sunburn again.”

Shou laughed quietly. His laughter was beautiful, when he didn’t hide his smile. It made his lips look gorgeous. Yutaka was happy that Shou had agreed to go out with him tonight.

“It’s not like that at all”, Shou said and pulled a plate of grilled pork towards himself. They had ordered a variety of snacks with their drinks, but most of them were gone by now. Shou eyed the meat curiously, but did not pick up his chopsticks.

“I’m all gloomy. Did you even listen to one of my songs before?”

Yutaka snorted.

“Yes, and that’s what I mean”, he insisted. He wondered, if Shou could really not see it. To Yutaka, Shou was nothing but a ball of joy and positive energy. “You write about all those painful emotions of yours. But you do it in a funny way. You allow people to laugh at you and to relate to you. So many people find solace in your songs. Because when you feel sad, you don’t just give in to it. You are productive and funny and kind. Also, stop staring at that meat already and just eat it.”

Shou turned his head and looked at Yutaka quietly. For a moment, Yutaka wondered, if he had given himself away. If he had spoken a little too enthusiastically about Shou’s good qualities and let on how strongly he cared for him.

But then Shou threw back his head and burst out laughing, as if the last words had just needed a moment longer to get through to him. He didn’t seem to laugh, because Yutaka had said something especially funny, but just because he was drunk and happy. Yutaka found himself smiling widely for no specific reason, either. He just smiled, because Shou was drunk and happy, too.

“I shouldn’t be eating more”, Shou said. “I will grow fat and no one will love me. See, that’s the kind of person I am. Always with those negative thoughts.”

“You seem happy alright tonight”, Yutaka observed.

Shou grinned. He did look a little embarrassed now.

“That proves how desperate I am”, he said. “Craving human interaction so much, I’m even happy to spend time with an idiot like you.”

Shou picked up his chopsticks.

Yutaka watched him for a moment, as he picked up a piece of grilled pork. He did it in an unnecessarily complicated way, as if he needed to inspect the meat throughout from different angles before eating it.

He wondered if Shou was right and the lack of human interaction during the last weeks showed. Yutaka felt Shou’s presence too strongly tonight. He seemed overly aware of his body next to himself. The air all around seemed to grow hotter when Shou leaned in and Yutaka had to follow the movement of his hands while he spoke and he had to stare at Shou’s lips when they formed a smile. Yutaka wanted to get closer to him in a very vague, undefined way. He just thought it would be nice to hold Shou’s body and sense him close. He had missed him a lot.

Only after staring at him for a good while, did Yutaka realize what Shou was doing.

“Oi, what happened to growing fat and lonely?!”, he inquired sternly.

Shou shrugged awkwardly, staring at his chopsticks in great concentration.

“I’ll just work out tomorrow. It won’t show for sure.”

Shou shoved the meat into his mouth. It was a pretty big piece and he opened his eyes widely while chewing. He looked overjoyed while eating.

Amused Yutaka shook his head.

“See”, he said. “You will be hungover tomorrow for sure. It’s very optimistic of you to think you are going to work out. But still, you are willing to stay hopeful. You have a very optimistic personality.”

Shou swallowed soundly.

“No, I don’t!”, he protested as if Yutaka had offended him. “I’m very pessi … pessi …”

He paused and then stared at Yutaka with an empty expression. Yutaka tried not to laugh, because he looked too adorable, trying to drunkenly recall a word that had more than three syllables.

“What’s the word again? Pessimi … pessimizumu? Is that what you call it?”

He made a confused face, that created wrinkles at the root of his nose.

Yutaka thought that he would really love to kiss Shou right now. Not seeing him for so long had made him forget how soft and full Shou’s lips were. They looked very kissable.

Yutaka licked his own lips, trying to buy time to remember what their conversation had been about.

“No, that’s not the term”, he said. “But that makes sense, since you are not pessimistic at all. You try again and again, because you are so full of hope.”

“No”, Shou said and put on an adorable pout. “It’s not optimistic to do something again and again, although you know you will fail. It’s stupid and pathetic.”

“It’s strength”, Yutaka said.

In his opinion, Shou was the strongest man, he had ever met. Yutaka himself was often too scared to try. Or he gave up easily. He had given up on bass and he had more or less given up on guitar. He didn’t have Shou’s optimism that one day he would get better. One throwback and Yutaka gave up. Shou probably did not like men and Yutaka would never kiss him, because he wasn’t brave enough to hope that maybe he did.

“No, it’s sad. Let me tell you about how I fall into the trap of hope again and again … with women.” Shou paused again and raised his hands. He surely turned dramatic when he drank. “Or should I call them … demons?!”

Yutaka tried to wince, but had to laugh anyway.

“Please, not the ex-girlfriend stories!”, he inquired. It was pretty much Shou’s favourite topic when he drank.

“Let me tell you about my ex-girlfriends”, Shou carried on, as if Yutaka hadn’t said anything at all.

Yutaka looked at him affectionately. Although the hairdressers were open again, Shou hadn’t went out to have his hair fixed yet. Dark roots were showing visibly and at the tips, his blonde hair looked dry and frayed. With the light blonde hair and his pale skin, Shou resembled a ghost. Without contouring his face looked slimmer.

“Here are some facts. My average relationship so far has lasted for about one month. All of my exes have dumped me. Since my thirty’s birthday, I have been dumped eight times, out of which three women just ghosted me.”

Shou shook his head slowly.

“My heart has been torn out of my chest, stomped upon and eaten while it was still beating.”

Yutaka burst into snorting laughter.

“You are exaggerating, Shou”, he pointed out.

“Every single woman has made it very clear, that they did not want to be with an ugly and brooding person such as myself.” Shou sighed heavily. “I’ve been hurt so often, that I started to believe that I deserved it, because no one could possibly want to date me.”

The last sentence he had spoken more quietly, staring at his glass thoughtfully. Yutaka could tell that the alcohol was about to make him drift off into melancholy. It often happened to Shou, once he brought up his exes.

Yutaka watched him from the side for a moment. Shou’s nose was very cute, looking small in his large face.

Sometimes, Yutaka wished he had realized how he felt about Shou, before all of this had happened to him. Tonight, Shou had seemed so happy, but Yutaka knew, that there was another side to him, too. A side that was sad and always too hard on himself and never pleased with his looks and his personality. Yutaka thought, that if he had been the first one to love Shou, he would have gotten it right. He wouldn’t have hurt him like those women had, and maybe Shou would be happy a little more often nowadays and sad a little less. Yutaka wished he could erase those past experiences from Shou’s memory. Not because he was jealous of those women, but because he felt like he would have done better than them.

But it was too late and the Shou sitting next to him now was already damaged and he already wore his scars. But then, Yutaka liked the brooding parts of Shou’s personality as well. He liked how they never got the better of Shou, but made it into songs instead and how his experiences had made him warm and gentle with others. He loved Shou for the person he was today and there was nothing to be done about any of it.

“It’s not like all of those relationships ended soon”, Yutaka scolded Shou, to get him out of his self-pity. “You make it sound like no one stayed with you longer than a month! That’s not true.”

Shou sucked on his lower lip for a moment. Yutaka wondered if he was even aware of doing so.

“True. But my personal record is about five months. Five months is as close as I ever got to my happily ever after.” Shou sighed again.

Yutaka furrowed his brow sternly.

“I guess I’m hard to be around for too long”, Shou added quietly.

“Oi!”, Yutaka interrupted him. “I’ve been hanging out with you for twenty years now. If I put up with you for so long, it should prove it’s possible.”

Shou chuckled.

“It’s doesn’t count”, he said.

Yutaka wanted to ask, why it didn’t count, but then he was scared that Shou would point out that Yutaka was nothing but a friend. Hearing that would hurt. It was better to not risk it.

“The problem seems to be with the women”, Yutaka observed and then decided, that it was worth a try. The alcohol made him braver than usual and it was nothing but a joke anyway. “Maybe you should try men instead.”

Shou turned his head slightly and cast Yutaka a sly look out of the corner of his eyes. The red dots on his cheeks were clearly visible again, but Yutaka couldn’t tell if it was because of his words, or if it was just caused by the alcohol.

“Actually”, Shou said and grinned without directly looking at Yutaka. His smile was a weird mixture of cheeky, proud and embarrassed. “I dated a guy once.”

Yutaka’s stomach jolted.

He told himself to stay calm. Surely, Shou just meant like in a high school phase kind of way. Yutaka shouldn’t get his hopes up.

“When?”, Yutaka asked, angry at himself because his voice sounded so flat with anticipation. “In middle school or what?”

Shou made an awkward hand movement and laughed. He was clearly blushing now.

“No, not that long ago. About three years ago, I think.”

Yutaka stared at him in confusion. He wondered why Shou had never mentioned it before, but then Yutaka had never told him about his own preferences either.

And probably, it had just been one or two dates for a try-out anyway. Shou had probably been curious. He was a curious, open-minded person, even if he claimed otherwise.

“What happened?”, Yutaka asked.

Shou turned more serious and shrugged, now looking at Yutaka again. He did no longer seem embarrassed. Yutaka was surprised about how much he seemed to be at terms with himself about this.

“Six weeks and he figured that the problem was me, not him”, Shou stated dryly.

Yutaka couldn’t help laughing. Shou had a way of mocking himself that made it nearly impossible not to laugh at him and almost impossible not to relate to him, too.

“Sounds like he was a douchebag”, Yutaka concluded. “So, the problem is not women. You just have shit taste.”

Shou laughed out loud. He looked so beautiful, that Yutaka wanted to kiss him again. For a brief second, he wondered if he was allowed to do so. Six weeks was a surprisingly long time. Shou had surely kissed that guy as well.

“Honestly”, Shou said and lowered his voice, leaning forward. Yutaka grew hot again, because he got so close. “The sex was amazing, though.”

Yutaka stared at him wide-eyed. Somehow, he had not expected that.

“Really?”, he assured incredulous.

Shou nodded hectically. He was still leaning in, with that hunched over posture of his.

“Yeah, I was a little hesitant about it, because you know. I thought it would feel uncomfortable or something. But then I thought – what if it feels really good instead and I’m missing out on that? So, I tried. And boy, did it feel good.”

Yutaka stared right into Shou’s dark eyes.

“So, you let him fuck you?”, he assured bluntly.

Shou laughed. He had the habit of not always tilting back his head when he laughed, but rather bending forward and pulling up his shoulders. It made him look giddy, when he laughed.

“Yeah, and that’s the only thing I do not regret about that relationship.”

Yutaka chuckled. He couldn’t quite believe that Shou had just went out there and had had sex with another man.

“See”, he said. “Always optimistic. Even with gay sex, you were more hopeful than you were scared.”

Shou smirked and turned his head.

He looked lost in thought now, but not directly unhappy.

“But it’s not a very positive attitude, is it? To date someone with the constant feeling that it will fail anyway, I mean. I’ve always felt like I was just waiting for the relationship to end. Everyone could sense that. That’s why my partners never stay long. Dating me always feels like an interim situation, I guess.”

“You are giving too much credit to yourself”, Yutaka said. “I’m sure the girls who ghosted you after the first date, just didn’t like you.”

Shou burst out laughing and turned his head towards Yutaka again. His lips looked so wide and full and his smile was so beautiful and his eyes seemed even warmer when he laughed.

Yutaka leaned in and kissed him.

He hadn’t thought it through at all and wasn’t sure which reaction he had expected from Shou. But Shou did not flinch and did not pull back. He just held very still and his lips felt soft.

Yutaka pulled back again, eyeing Shou closely.

Shou broke into a smile again, that looked nervous and happy. He looked very flushed now, too. His reaction was precious somehow.

Still smiling, as if he just couldn’t help it, Shou turned away again and took up his glass.

“I really miss our fans, you know”, he said, completely out of context and emptied his glass with a few, loud gulps.

Yutaka stared at Shou’s lips, that he had kissed only now. He couldn’t help smiling, either.

“We can still stay in touch”, Yutaka pointed out. “Through social media and all. They’ve been very encouraging.”

Shou exhaled soundly.

“I miss seeing their faces, though. I miss seeing that they are having a good time at our shows. How am I supposed to tell how they feel, if it’s just a text message?”

Yutaka shook his head. He wondered, if he should put his hand onto Shou’s back to comfort him. He wondered, if he was allowed to kiss Shou again.

Somehow, the interruption did not feel weird, though. It made the kiss feel casual in the best kind of way. Like Yutaka hadn’t done something big and scandalizing and like it wouldn’t change the way they talked to each other in the future and like maybe he might kiss Shou again without ruining their friendship forever.

“Their wellbeing is not your duty alone”, Yutaka reminded him. “You need to take care of yourself first of all.”

“Aah”, Shou said and turned his head, making a face where he squinted only one of his eyes shut. It caused his face to wrinkle up weirdly. “Sounds like something an irresponsible douchebag would say.”

“Douchebags, what was it about douchebags again?”, Yutaka asked and tilted his head. “Oh, right. Aren’t those your type?”

Shou snorted and pulled up his shoulders a little. He looked like he was trying to curl up in himself and Yutaka wondered, if he was acting defensive.

“I thought of doing a conference call”, Shou said. “Doesn’t the screen split into little honeycombs or something, if there are a lot of people on the call? I think I read something like that.”

He looked at Yutaka as if he was really expecting an answer.

“How would I know?!”, Yutaka huffed.

He wondered why Shou was talking about honeycombs instead of flirting with him. He didn’t seem desperate to change the topic, though. He just seemed nervous.

“Well, but then I thought many fans would not feel comfortable showing their face, right?”, Shou carried on. “They would just use pictures probably. And they would be too small anyway, I guess. It wouldn’t work with so many people.”

“Why wouldn’t they show their faces?”, Yutaka asked confused.

Shou shrugged.

“Embarrassment? Privacy?”

“They wouldn’t have to feel embarrassed in front of you. Just do it without makeup and you’ll be the weirdest looking guy on the call automatically!”

“Oi!”, Shou huffed, then he turned his head. He was hunching over so much, he had to look up to Yutaka. “That kiss just now …”, he started.

Yutaka’s mouth went dry all of a sudden. Shou had changed the topic again quite abruptly.

“Yeah?”, he asked warily.

“Would you care to do that again?”, Shou asked shyly.

He was smiling kind of helplessly again. When Shou smiled like that, Yutaka cared for nothing else but kissing him.

He looked around to assure no one was able to watch them in their private booth. A waiter might walk in on them, but chances for that weren’t really high.

Yutaka nodded shortly, then he leaned in and kissed Shou once more. This time, Shou reached up with one hand and placed it against Yutaka’s neck. He was kissing him back now. Shou’s kiss felt hesitant rather than demanding, but he was parting his lips and his mouth was warm and soft. Their kiss lasted longer this time.

Finally, Shou pulled back his hand and Yutaka took the hint and broke the kiss, leaning back.

Shou was beaming and his cheeks looked very red. Yutaka hadn’t believed Shou could get any cuter than when he was happy. But when he was happy and embarrassed, he was completely adorable.

For a moment, Yutaka had to fight the urge to just wrestle him down on the padded bench they were sitting on. The ironic part was that he did not want to do anything sexual to Shou right now. He just wanted to climb on top of him and wrap his arms around him and he wanted to kiss him. He wanted to kiss him on the lips and on the nose and on his forehead and on his neck and his arms and hands and shoulders and he wanted Shou to giggle and always look this happy and adorable. He wanted to hold Shou and make him forget about all the people who had hurt him before and feel him close and let him know just what Yutaka saw when he looked at him. He wanted to make Shou feel like he was the most precious man in the world.

Shou turned towards the table and pushed his forefinger against his empty glass. Yutaka noticed again how beautiful Shou’s hands looked.

“You want to order another round?”, Yutaka suggested.

Shou shook his head.

“You can have my drink, if you are thirsty”, Yutaka offered.

Shou looked over at Yutaka’s glass hesitantly for a second, then he made a face.

“No thanks”, he said, but it was pretty obvious that what he really meant was that in his opinion Yutaka’s choice of drink tasted disgusting.

Yutaka smirked.

“You are my type”, Shou suddenly said. “But I’m done with dating.”

“Really?”, Yutaka asked mockingly.

He took hold of Shou’s hand resting on the table plate. Shou did not pull back. His skin felt dry and a little cold. His hands were slim and strong and bony.

“Really”, Shou confirmed and looked right at Yutaka. His expression was serious. His dark eyes looked sad. “I’m done with love. No more relationships, no more hook-ups, no more anything for me. I’m tired of getting disappointed. I’m pessimistic. I know it won’t work out this time, either.”

Yutaka used his thumb to stroke the back of Shou’s hand. He knew, why Shou was not pulling back from the touch. Because no matter what he said – deep down, Shou was the most hopeful person Yutaka had ever met.

“Okay”, Yutaka said quietly and gave Shou’s hand a little squeeze. “Now, want to go back to my place and have sex?”

Shou’s whole face lit up. His eyes became even smaller, his mouth turned wide and big and his gorgeous teeth were showing.

Because no matter how many times he got disappointed and hurt, he never gave up. Shou was dumb and brave enough to always take the risk again, hoping that maybe – this time – it might work.

“Yes”, Shou said.

And Yutaka thought, that he really sounded quite optimistic about it.

[what2finish]

Creators & Bidders Information

If you do not find the answer to your question here, send an ask or email us as what2finish@gmail.com

____

Creators:

What counts as a WIPs?

The short answer is anything. It can be a work you’ve started or a prompt you thought was neat. It can be an idea of an alternative universe you want to work your fandom into. You can offer anything you wanted to try, but maybe have no concrete ideas for, as well (ie: a pairing you’re intrigued by, but have no WIP/HC for).

This event is to encourage you to make something you have wanted to do as a priority.

How many WIPs/prompts can I have?

There is no limit to how many WIPs and/or prompts you can list. We do ask that if you have a good chunk, around 5 or 6 longer ones, that you provide a link to a folder of them on your GDrive. You can always go into details or summaries of some of your favorites in the WIPs/prompt section of your creator post.

Can we include published WIPs as well - or is just stuff that hasn’t yet been shared for public consumption the only WIPs?

Sure can! Anything you want that little boost to help you cross a goal off your bucket list is welcomed!

Can I just have my bidders tell me what they want me to do?

Yes! You could just put your likes and dislikes/do not wants and ask potential bidders to contact you about their ideas or say you’re open to whatever bidders want (with exceptions of your DNWs).

Does the creator-winner relationship work like a commission?

No. You are under no obligation to give anything for credit anything to your winner, although we ask that you do notify your winner of the posting at least. However you want to work with your winner is up to you. If you would like to use this as a way to motivate you to finish something or as a way for someone else to decide what you work on next, and nothing else, that is up to you. As a kindness, we recommend putting your feelings of collabing/working in your winners like/etc. into your creator's notes.

What if I decide to add, drop, or change an auction?

If you decide to add or change anything in your auctions, please DM an admin or send us an email (what2finish@gmail.com). This also needs to be done if you change something on the Sign Up form. Just as long as you have contacted us to let us know if you’re redoing the form or doing a second add-on auction form, we will accept it.

If you do not contact us to tell us you are doing a redo form or doing an add-on form, your current information may not get updated.

If you wish to drop a second auction or drop out as a creator during the Sign up stage, please email us IMMEDIATELY. We understand that these are uncertain times. You do not need to give us a reason, you can simply write an email stating “I do not wish to have a second auction” or “I do not wish to be a creator anymore”.

What should I do for the starting bid?

We suggest starting your bid off low as it encourages bidders to bid.

Please feel free to do tiers for your bids. For example for fanfiction:

“If bidding reaches $20, I will write two of my smaller WIPs for the auction and at $30, two of my longer WIPs. If it goes pass $50, I’ll do two WIPs of bidder’s choice and one small fic that’s under 5k of the winner’s prompt.”

Also, consider your own commission prices or what others’ commission prices are. Your Art Path has a great section of advise for commission prices here.

Still uncertain of your starting bid? Talk to friends in your discord, tumblr, and/or fandom who participated as creators in other fandom charity auctions to ask if they can help you with your starting bid/bid increment. You can also check out Marvel Trumps Hate or Fandom Trumps Hate FAQs for their recommendations.  

Keep in mind, all of the winning bid will be going towards charity.

What should I put for my second auction if both will be for the same creation?

We recommend separating your auctions by fandoms so that your lesser known fandom has it’s own auction to shine in.

If you have multiple fandoms we want to work with, you might separate your auctions by more popular ships in one auction and less popular ships in another.

In reality, you don’t need to have two unique auctions.

What should I put in my “Creator Notes” section?

You can put your tiers here. You can put your limitations on how big or how many of your auction you will do. Be aware if you have something that states “For every $10 past $30 I will write 2k” and the final bid gets to $100, you have now promised at least 14,000 more words to what you initially offered.

What is the deadline for completing my winner(s) works?

The soft deadline for completed works is going to be December 1st, 2021. If you do not think you will be able to meet this deadline, please just keep us at WTF informed.

There is no hard rule for finishing. ‘Finished’ can just mean moving the ball down the court. If it’s another chapter or comic page, etc is up for bid, that’s fine. This event is to encourage you to work on things sitting in your WIP/prompt piles.

We recommend putting the information in your Creator Notes for your auction.

Can I bid as well as be a creator?

Yes! Please feel free to do both. We would love to have you bid to your heart’s (or wallet’s) desire. Join a podbid! Or Seven! Hype up other creators! Ask one of your favorite fandom creators if they’re interested in joining the fun too!

Where and how do I post my completed Auction work?

You can complete it however you prefer! You can post it on tumblr and link the @what2finish blog if it’s a shorter story. You can post on Ao3 in the collection WTF Philippines Relief 2020. If you are posting anywhere else that we ask that you make a tumblr post with a link to the story so we can reblog your story on our blog and mark your Auction work completed.

There are no posting rules to your completed work besides to tag for anything nsfw or possible triggers. You can post it all together or one chapter at a time. You can post multiple series, it’s all up to you.

____

Bidders:

Do I need to sign up to bid?

No. You will need a working email address so we can contact you if you win an auction. Just fill out the bid form during Auction week; November 22nd to November 28th, 11:59:00pm CST.

What name do I use for bidding?

You can use a fandom name or a nickname, whatever name you are comfortable with.

What is Preview Week?

Preview week is the week when all the creator posts will be upload and the Masterpost of creators will be released on the tumblr. It will give bidders the chance to browse all the auctions before Auction Week to find creators and auctions they want to bid on. This will also give last minute creator sign ups and the mods a chance to make sure everything is spick and span for Auction Week.

Can I contact creators before Auction Week?

Please do! Ask after their auctions! Ask about their WIPs or ideas! Ask about pairings! Clarify their wants and do not wants with them!

In fact, if you have a creator in mind for this charity event, ask them to consider joining!

The Auction ends when I’m unavailable, what do I do?

We understand that with the time difference all around that world, there are bound to be some who are in a time zone that doesn’t align nicely with Central Standard Time. In this case we suggest getting a proxy bidder to help you out. If you cannot find your own, you are more than welcomed to contact us (ask or email) and we will put out a call to our followers for someone who is willing to be a proxy for you.

When will I get my confirmation email I won?

The mod team will be working to get the winner’s emails out to them as soon as the auction ends. Please keep in mind that gmail only allows a certain number of emails to be send out at a time. This means the emails will be sent out in batches and depending on the auction, it might take a few days to get your winning confirmation email.

Please do not get in contact with the creator or donate until you get your confirmation email you have won the auction.

What do I do if I win an auction?

You will get an email within the next two to three days after the auction closes confirming your win and asking you to donate to one of the charities listed. As stated in the last answer above, please do not donate or contact your creator for the auction until after you have received your confirmation email and you have donated.

But, once your have gotten your confirmation email and you have donated, the mods will send an email with both you and your creator. From there, it will be up to you guys to figure out the auction win from there.

Can I donate more than my winning bid?

Yes! The more the merrier. There is no limit to the donations you can make. 

I would like to have the craft/artwork or be part of the creation process as the winner, can I?

That will be between you and the creator you won. If they do not specifically state they will give you their work, they are under no obligation to give it. If you are unsure of their stance, or it is not listed that they are looking to work with the bidder, please reach out to the creator to ask them. 

[flyswhumpcenter]

Bad Things Happen Bingo! The event where you send me requests according to this marvelous card! (Red cross is the completed prompt, character headshots are prompts I’ve already filled. Green deltas are for requested prompts.)

It's fine if I'm used to it.

Confession: I love Ichihoshi. I'm the first to point out flaws in Inazuma and, well, Orion is clearly not exempt from that. I know Ichihoshi's redemption arc isn't the best, that it has wasted potential (especially with Mitsuru being heckin' ded), I know. And even then? I'd protecc Hikaru. He falls into almost all of my favorite character credentials: hardworking, good-meaning, pretty intelligent, cool motif, (most likely has whump stuff attached to them in canon...). Oops. About this oneshot, it's abstract on purpose because, well, you've most likely read the tags. It's almost a cryptic character study because, man, I want to write more about this stardust boy. Most likely won't be this abstract next time. It's also much softer than the previous one because I felt softer and sweeter this time, enjoy the calm before the storm, before the storm before the calm. I've taken a lot of liberties with the actual nightmares Ichihoshi is shown to have in the anime, but hey, fanfiction is also for that, right?

-------

Wishing Upon a Shooting Star in the Twilight Sky

Summary: Hikaru, the eyes who slither in the dark, and an ever-changing corridor. Nothing out of the ordinary. (or: yet another feverish nightmare in the mind of a boy who used not to have people to rely on)

Fandom: Inazuma Eleven: Orion no Kokuin (spoilers for up to episodes 13-16) Relationship: Ichihoshi & Inazuma Japan

Wordcount: 2K words

Event hosted by @badthingshappenbingo

AO3 version available here.

-----

A pair of eyes welcomes him as soon as his lids open, shining in the dark, viciously staring at him wit the intensity of a thousand stares. He remembers the story of the poisons of poisons and wonders if those aren’t the eyes of the eyes, those who can see through walls and peek behind the curtains of the mind, those who ignore the skull entirely.

He’s too used to them to be scared of them anymore, so he gets up and running for the day, dressing up as the red irises still dissect his anatomy from where they stand, shrouded in the darkness of the corners of the bedroom.

 It always feels cold, his skin shivering, hair dressed on his arms and legs before he puts on a jacket and decide to ignore the chills. The eyes don’t leave their prey, the shine of a fang piercing through the shadows like a claw tearing through a curtain, but that’s to be expected. There’s still a hinge of fear in the back of his mind, the non-null risk that he could get eaten alive, but he shouldn’t let that phase him. He’s not a prey worth the effort anyway.

He exits the unfamiliar room, ready for the day, leaving the creature in the shadows as the day finally shines upon this country again, sunlight bathing the corridors through the windows. It’s soothing, somewhat.

 The faces around him ignore his presence entirely. Far away, his brother, his beloved older brother, glaring at him, surrounded by people whose language he suddenly doesn’t understand anymore, whose alphabet reads like drawings on old stone walls. He’s lost and getting scared, the place changing constantly, and he’ll never get used to how the colours and noises keep transforming each time he tries to focus on one sound or object.

His forehead hurts from how many things his brain analyses at once, trying to give sense to the nonsensical maze of sensations swirling around him. He feels smothered, wrapped by a snake that doesn’t exist, head like a nebula who cannot settle for one star and instead decides to confuse him even further. He’s in the eye of a tornado, watching its curves surrounding him with nothing but confusion and a headache.

 He manages to peek through the wind curtains, handing his hand outside as to try and catch his brother’s attention, yelling but never hearing his own voice doing so. His brother’s name is missing from his boggled memories, those trying to claw at his wounded throat during this moment of vulnerability, so he calls out in vague manners, words running away from his mind. And yet, despite the dread, despite the panic and despite the horror, it feels like a déjà vu.

He’s been here before, he realizes, as he notices the patterns the walls’ changing forms adopt. They switch in cycles, colours succeeding each other in disharmony, unsynchronized among themselves to create a nauseating vertigo, whose dazzling lights blinded his eyes used to the darkness, rendering him dizzy. And, even then, he can still notice the cycles and how they function, using what’s left available of his brain to clear his way out of the mess.

 His brother glares at him from the outside, defying him with a smirk to get out of the tornado. Closing his eyes as not to enforce his migraine, he steps blindly forward, hands trembling and eager to find a wall to find some new failsafe support. His fingertips don’t quite touch anything of note, brushing against the temperature-shifting air he breathes. He continues on anyway, now aware this is a place he knows, a corridor that makes sense if he stops seeing it.

He needs to exit this place, this is all that comes to his mind. The creature will soon get used to the dizzying sparks of the outside. The storm will let down only once he’ll have found a room of calm and serenity. He’s used to it, he knows where he should be heading: the dark blue door, the one decorated with starry-like white dots that reminds him of the night sky. He remembers it so clearly.

 He trips on a misplaced carpet and scratches both knees and palms in his attempt at stopping his falls. It stings, but he’s used to such small pains, and he continues walking as the wooden floor under his feet starts catching on fire behind his back. It smells like ash and smoke, going into his nose and down his trachea, making him cough as he tries to still breathe. His sense of smell is neutralized, with his earing and touch all he has left to guide himself. It’s fine, he’ll manage: sensory deprivation isn’t an unfamiliar feeling.

Around him resonate double, echoing laughter. He doesn’t recognize the voices enough to tell who they belong to, yet they’re familiar: they sound like former friends who turned his back on him once upon a time, people he’s wanted to forget the faces and names of, who’ve only stared at him with vengeful eyes since then. Some sound more common than the rest, others are more recent and he can swear he hears accents in some of the whispers thrown his ways. It’s fine, he’ll manage: being told he’s useless and getting threatened for being ineffective isn’t an unfamiliar feeling.

 He falls again, but this time, his eyes open. Before him is the bloodied hand of his brother and blue irises staring right into his, daggers planting themselves in his flesh as wooden shards search for a way to pierce through his legs’ skin. It hurts, he thinks he may have sprained his wrists and ankles in his fall. The hand is unwelcoming, the smoke invades his vision, makes his eyes tear up and blurry, water running down his cheeks. He still takes the offer nonetheless and tries rising to his feet, only to fall back down as he gets thrown backwards.

His brother sneers, words unintelligible, but hurtful anyway; and, in a moment of solace, he witnesses his own past self get engulfed by the snake who slithers in the dark of his bedroom, until the fangs throw themselves at him and he stops feeling anything.

 It’s fine because he’s used to the acid inside this deadly jaw, it’s fine because he’ll wake up in a sweat, just like he does every time. It’s a loop he’s not found the hole to yet, but this time, he finds back the hope spot before he can—

 Not unlike every other night before, Hikaru wakes up in a bolt, drenched in sweat, light hurting his eyes from how suddenly they’ve snapped open. His vision is blurry at first, but then clarifies, and he notices something strange right from the get-go: he isn’t alone.

Hanging right over his is the face of Endou, looking right at him. By sweeping across the room with his glance, he recognizes other faces: Nosaka, Hiura, Mikado, Asuto, Nishikage in the distance. It’s not his bedroom either: it looks like they’re near the pitch instead, if he can trust his sole vision of the ceiling and vague patch of green on his left.

 “Ichihoshi, can you hear me?” Endou asks, looking somewhat concerned.  

He tries smiling as an answer (that’s kind of a weird reflex to have), but chooses to also add a weak “yes” to his reply.

“Thank goodness!” Asuto sounds relieved. “We were so scared when you just collapsed like that!”

Ah, he’s forgotten to wonder how he even ended in this situation. On the other hand, is there really a point in asking himself questions he can’t find a reply to? His head is a mess.

 He feels something cold and wet being put on his forehead. He tries to put a hand on it to identify that, but his wrist won’t move, and he wonders if he’s not sprained it. Of course, it’s not possible: that was in his dream. He’s wide awake now, as he can tell from the lack of eyes trying to peek into his mind’s stained secrets.

“Take some rest,” Endou continues speaking, this expression not leaving his face.

“W-wait… What happened…?” He manages to ask.

 Endou’s face gets pushed aside by Nosaka’s, whose eyebrows are frowning and usual smirk has made a hundred-eighty. He looks less than pleased.

“Like Asuto just said, you suddenly collapsed during our usual training regimen. Technically, you merely fell asleep, so we were relieved until you started thrashing in your sleep.”

“Ah, yeah,” Asuto chimes in, “that was scary! Are you sure you’re okay?”

Good question.

“I guess…?”

“I wouldn’t say so,” Nosaka comments, arms crossed.

“You have a fever,” Mikado ends the sentence.

That makes sense, he supposes… It’s just weird that he has no recollection of ever getting this fever in the first place, even if it doesn’t sound too out-of-place for a thing like this to cause his memory to

“I’ll fetch Sekiya,” she adds before leaving.

 Despite the tension and the concern, these stares are comfortable, and he surprises himself to catch his eyelids closing on their own again. While this isn’t foreign, it’s been years since he’s felt this way. Strange and yet soothing, his brain doesn’t know what to make of it.

“You’re sure you’re fine?” Asuto asks, insistent. “You really looked in pain when you were asleep!”

Hikaru sits up, now that his body finally responds, making sure the cloth doesn’t fall off from his forehead. He still feels hands in his back, most likely Endou’s.

“It’s fine… I’m used to it.”

“Used to it?!”

 Both Asuto and Endou look horrified. Well, he should have seen it coming that others wouldn’t find it that usual, but it’s not worth this sudden appal.

“That makes it even less okay!” The former yells, drilling a hole through his already thumbing skull.

“I agree with Asuto,” Endou adds. “You should have talked to us about these. These absolutely can’t be good!”

“I know, but really, I’ll be fine…” He doesn’t like all the fuss, especially when he considers what he’s once done to them. “They’ve gotten better with time too.”

“For how long have they lasted?” Nosaka then asks again, not letting himself display the same kind of horror as their other teammates.

“I don’t really remember… I think they started when I joined Orion, but I forgot when exactly. They come in and out…”

 Everyone still looks appalled.

“What are those about?” Endou eventually speaks out.

“I don’t really know… They’re about my times at Orion, I’m sure of that, but they’re usually so abstract that it’s hard to tell. I think that’s why there’s always eyes glaring at me whenever I have those nightmares…”

He giggles at himself, “today was just worse than usual. It’s calmed down considerably since joining the team and… that’s why I’m convinced they’ll go away, eventually.”

“You’re still overexerted,” Nosaka comments, not without reason. “Even if we’re fighting Orion, you shouldn’t do that again. Having you collapse during a match would be a disaster.”

“I’m with Nosaka,” Endou adds. “You need rest, or else you won’t be able to do anything on the field!”

“B-but… If I’m not playing, are you going to…” Abandon him? No, he can’t say that out loud, not after what he’s done… Instead, he goes silent. He just can’t say that.

“Don’t worry for us, we have your back!” Asuto sounds as confident and happy as ever, even if he can tell his teammate is worried.

He laughs again, softly, to himself. “Thank you…”

 To his numbed surprise, Hikaru falls back asleep almost immediately, energy dragged down the well of the thoughts and wrapped in warmth again. Passing out like this in full daylight is but a weird experience he isn’t used to, but that’s fine: change needs to happen and, for once, he isn’t scared about losing something if he goes unconscious for a couple hours.

May the nightmares stop, now that he feels safe and sound.

[mystech-master]

Okay this might just be a me thing

Whenever I think of BBTAG fanfictions or stories, I always like to think that there are two different time periods in which to grab the RWBY characters from, each with their own ups and downs.

Option 1: What we see in game, In between Volumes 2 and 3, before the Vytal Festival Tournament.

and Option 2: In between Volumes 5 and 6, which is the period in which BBTAG was released.

Now just to clarify my thought process a bit more: I imagine 2 ideas for these kinds of stories. Either it’s your usual crossover where characters from franchise A go to franchise B and/or vice versa (think the Jimmy Timmy Power Hour on Nickelodeon), or we do what BBTAG did and have everyone plopped into the Phantom Field.

Here are my opinions on what comes from each era and what it could bring:

Vol 2-3 Period

All the characters are together, happy, and alive. Thus we get the characters who passed away, Pyrrha, Penny, Ozpin (I know he becomes Oscar but Ozpin as himself can be considered differently.

Going off of that, we got Pyrrha who would be a nice addition to the group (maybe she helps give the Investigation Team actual combat training instead of just winging it), we got Penny to add to the group of robot girls to be BFFs with, and I personally feel like Ozpin as the Big Good might garner a bit more respect from the other characters than him in Oscar’s body (I know that these other worlds are a bit more used to immortal children but not all of them might think that way).

No true focus villain yet for the heroes to go against. The only “antagonists” at that point in the series that we knew of, were Adam Taurus (preparing for the Fall of Beacon), and Roman Torchwick (who was imprisoned on ironwood’s ship). Meanwhile Cinder, Emerald, mercury and Neo were all disguised as Haven students. So they can’t exactly run off and join the axis of evil w/o blowing their cover.

You got 3 members of the Oz-luminati to act as the Big Good council next to Kagura, Kokonoe, Rachel, and Mitsuru (not too sure on who’d lead team Under Night In-Birth).

This being before RWBY learns about the Maidens and Salem and the Gods and Ozma, means they may not be mentally equipped to handle the cosmic bullshit that is Blazblue or Persona (not to the same level of Blazblue but still pretty insane).

Other characters/teams being present: like team CFVY or team SSSN, or even some of the other Vytal Festival Teams (ABRN, BRNZ, NDGO, or FNKI)

Volume 5-6 Period

Obviously, more characters are dead, so while we got less characters to interact with, but at the same time, now characters have lost something/someone and are a bit stronger mentally, having steeled their resolve to take on the big bad and avenge their friends.

We got Qrow and Ozcar as members of the team now. Qrow can add a nice level of coolness (him hanging with Ragna or Kagura), then we got Ozcar, who many people compare to Linne (I do like to think that Linne would ask Oscar what he thinks of the whole situation, because unlike Ozma’s reincarnations she immediately takes over the host body and she may have wondered what the people she’s taken over think of her. I mean she’s partially suicidal and wants Hyde to kill her with the Insulator because of this so it must be something she’s thought of).

More villains, not only do we got Maiden-Cinder, with Emerald and Mercury, but we got Psychopath Tyrian, Calm Bruiser Hazel, and Mad Doctor Watts (someone for Relius to talk science with). Not too sure on Salem herself b/c unlike every other villain from the other series she is mostly biding her time and working through others and sitting in her castle. So I don’t feel right plucking her from there.

The characters are now aware of the more cosmic levels of bullshit and thus might be able to keep up with the craziness of Blazblue and Persona.

You got Yang losing the arm and thus giving her more of the comparisons to Ragna that everyone loves, because everyone who writes interactions between them just give Yang a weird feeling in her arm when she hears about it. RWBY characters aren’t psychic “I jut know” kind of characters, it isn’t an anime. Sidenote: People tend to also have RWBY characters just be able to “sense Aura” like the Force or some other anime bullshit, when there is no evidence of this in canon, besides ninja Ren in Volume 4 (and even then he’s the ninja of the team, and I honestly feel like RWBY is getting a bit more anime as of late and I’m not liking that).

Jaune has his weapon upgrade and his Semblance, so he’s slightly less useless. I mean the dude was already a sort of joke character who was way behind in his training (and doesn’t even have a gun function like everyone else, I feel like long range abilities should be essential) compared to everyone else, let’s not have him be another Wild Card best friend character where he is the butt of a lot of jokes and is supposed to be lame to make his BFF look cooler.

Everyone is kinda busy with the Salem war, so I don’t think you could just pull them from this point in the story to go on a Multi-Dimensional side quest. it’d be one thing if it was world hopping (option 1 up top), but since the concept of time does not exist within the Phantom Field, it’s a good way for no one to be in a rush. Think in Persona Q, no one was in too much of a rush and everyone was able to just chill out at the school festival and hang, think that.

Weiss has her summoning down pat, which would give her an interesting arsenal if she happened to kill a Void or Shadow.

Those are just some things I feel like would be considered if using either of these time periods. If I missed something (specifically a pro or con of using that time period), feel free to tell me.

[pa-cha-ran]

This ask has made me a bit apprehensive, anon. I’m not 100% sure how to answer you, because I’m confused by a few of things you’ve said. While I agree that an interpretation of the HxH universe being okay with gay relationships is as valid as any other headcanon, I know 100% that for me, I’ve never once set out to write a homophobia-free utopia in my work. Based only on your current ask and the details you generously provided after I answered your previous ask, I think we could have a misunderstanding where you’ve interpreted my universes as completely lacking homophobia maybe because I didn’t include, or else tried to subvert, some of the “gay romance” tropes you’ve come to expect to read in fics with gay protagonists.

For instance, I know I’ve included references to homophobia, when relevant, in at least one of the fics you’ve mentioned, Practical Experience (I like your shortening to PracExp, so, I’ll use that from this point). However, while I just finished writing Caveat Venditor last year, I haven’t re-read PracExp or Preserved in Jars in ages, so, I’m not sure exactly where specific things happened anymore in those fics and can’t cite exact examples off the top of my head to make a point. Maybe some other followers of mine who’ve read the fics more recently can help remind me (just send an ask, anon or not, I guess, if you want to help out, anyone). 

That said, I do recall in PracExp that the mentions of homophobia/bigotry/prejudice were usually brought up by scenes with Leorio, not really Kurapika. My 2017-ish Leorio was all about closeted bi anxiety and not calling himself gay, because that was how I kind of consolidated his clear, expressed canon interest in women with a story where I wanted him to be in love with Kurapika. It’s not a novel approach by any means, but I figured there was more or less a precedent to extrapolate in that direction with Leorio, since he deliberately misrepresents himself from his very first scene in canon anyway.

For now, though, instead of tediously tagging every reference to homophobia in my fics, I’m just going to give a general answer about my approach to gay characters and relationships and the tropes that tend to go along with them in a lot of “gay romance” stories. Then I guess I’ll clarify what my intentions were, as I perceived them while writing even if I ultimately failed to convey them, in the examples you mentioned. The whole reply is kind of long, however, so, I’ll put it under a cut. Maybe this can clear up any misunderstanding? I don’t know. At this point I might just be super going off on a tangent. You’re not obligated to read any of it if you don’t want to. I tend to over-respond and clarify too much when I’m anxious, so, I probably just wrote 95% of this to make myself feel better in the end, and overall it might not really serve any other purpose than that.

Too many disclaimers because that anxiety tho

Initial Disclaimer: This is my personal opinion as of this exact moment in time, while I’m writing this response. It’s not set in stone. My opinion of the moment might change in years, months, or even weeks. Someone might respond to this very post with “actually, this part is iffy because…” and I will be like “cool, I never saw it that way, good point.” I don’t speak for all writers, gay or straight, now or in the future, or even the writer I myself was five years ago or will be next year. I’m not telling you what’s right or wrong, how one should or shouldn’t write gay characters or relationships in fanfiction; I’m just telling you where I’m at personally, as of writing Caveat Venditor. I’ve been writing fic since I was like 11, though, so, I know for a fact that how I think and approach things is malleable.

Second disclaimer: I’m using gay as a general term just because it gets used like that a lot online, and also the ask primarily just said “gay” without being specific. If anyone wants to argue semantics with me, I’m just going to get steamrolled by you, because I’m just following the lead of the ask and don’t have an argument to fight back on this decision. While I don’t personally view “gay” as the best catch-all term for every variation in relationships outside the cisgender heterosexual norm, my feelings are mixed and would probably come off as incoherent and contradictory if I were to set them down, and anyway, replying to this ask isn’t where I’m going to make a whole thing about it.

Third disclaimer (last one): I feel like I should confess I don’t read a lot of romance, as like a genre, in books or fanfic. So, while I’m about to give you a lot of perhaps high-sounding reasons why I don’t like writing certain tropes, keep in mind I’m an idiot when it comes to romance fiction in general. I’ve had plenty of long dark nights of the soul where I’ve asked myself if I write ships into my fics because I genuinely like them or at least just got used to framing fanworks in that way since I was a kid, OR if I write ships into my fics because I secretly and pessimistically don’t believe most people in fandom would read a fic without a some kind of ship in it. When I got into fanfiction as a kid, I mostly stuck to crackfic or fics with humorous writing styles, since that’s aways been way more my speed. Eventually, I started incorporating ships more and more in my own stuff, but, even if it can be fun to write a ship, it’s always sort of felt like something I had to do and make the most of. Therefore, I’m kinda out of touch with what people probably expect from romance fiction, simply because I don’t do my homework and read a lot of it, gay straight or otherwise.

On to the the whole long thing now

I can only say right away that most tropes of the sort you mentioned with gay characters constantly suffering mental and emotional anguish for not being straight aren’t ones I support when(!) those tropes start to get treated as the de facto way to write all gay characters, ever. Most of my fics featuring gay relationships are more or less experiments in how to not rely on the most overused iterations of those same tropes. Mostly, it would bore and depress me to write a more formulaic “gay romance” full of self-hate and disgust and anxiety over endless rejection, so, in the spirit of mixing things up, it’s natural for me to skip over some of these hallmarks/tropes of specifically tragic or high-drama “gay romance” stories (i.e., the big scary coming out scene, the cringy “but we’re both dudes!” conversation, etc…). There are a lot of reasons for my final choice, and it’s usually determined on a case-by-base basis. For example, I might be going for a lighter tone overall, or I find a certain trope offensive, or I simply believe that in the context of a specific story, my gay characters ought to have problems with their relationships that aren’t just the fact that they’re gay.

Basically, what you’re reading from me isn’t intended to be homophobia-free universes. It’s just stories of gay people that don’t rely on homophobia (discrimination, bigotry, hate) alone to create drama. Now, I don’t know if by “gay romance” you’ve read if you mean published novels, or you mean fanfiction or whatever, but for my HxH work, stuff like big coming out scenes and running into homophobes in the wild doesn’t always fit in with the people or the situations I’m writing. How often a gay person encounters blatant prejudice and hate to the point they feel obligated in some way to respond to it (either outwardly or inwardly) really has a lot of do with the who, what, and where of the situation (which I mentioned in my first response to you). For example, the homophobic reactions of strangers won’t mean the same thing to a 15-year-old just coming to terms with their sexuality, as they would to a full-grown adult Pro-Hunter who literally has a real, physical license to do what they want. A non-Hunter gay kid might feel the smallest rejection like it’s the end of the world, because a kid is at the relative mercy of so many people and powers above them and outside their ability to control, societally speaking. A Pro-Hunter, on the other hand, is already beyond the normal human experience, and being gay is or can be just another detail about them along with their ability to punch magical beasts in the face with Nen bullshit. Therefore, how these two characters feel and respond to societal pressure won’t typically be the same, because the underlying difference in privilege and power they experience is so drastic.

So like, the world I write isn’t necessarily less homophobic. It’s just that the HxH characters I’ve written aren’t normal members of society in the first place (not even Zepile, not really). Even in modern day America, being openly gay where I went to middle school in the rural Deep South is a way more depressing and dangerous experience than being gay in like, San Francisco, maybe (I haven’t been to San Francisco to prove it, so please don’t cite me on this). If you go even narrower, being gay in one family is not the same as being gay in another family, even if both those families are neighbors. If you grow up in a family that loves, accepts, and supports you no matter what, it doesn’t mean hurrah, we as a society have cured homophobia. It just means we’re one family closer to a better environment for gay kids in the future. With that in mind, when you read my fics, you are looking at characters who I, for the perhaps selfish sake of my own well-being, have surrounded with that “good family” of folks who accept them or at least don’t know/care that the gay character is gay. You can’t really judge the entire society based on the kinds of people my characters are and who they interact with, in what contexts. 

Now, as for internalized stuff and/or tragic pasts, not every work with gay characters needs to delve into everyone’s gay trauma and suffering, especially if the story itself isn’t about working through and hopefully overcoming that stuff. This next thing I’m going to say is deeply derived from my own feelings and frustrations, so you absolutely don’t have to agree with me at all here, but: I’m starting to find it kind of rude, after all this time, this underlying assumption that if you’re going to write gay characters, no matter what kind of story it is, you have to make readers privy to everyone’s custom-made, gay-specific suffering. Despite having myself grown up between various, grossly homophobic communities, I personally don’t feel like it makes a gay character relatable to me in a super positive way. It usually makes me feel depressed as hell. It comes off more as preaching to the choir at best, or kind of sickeningly voyeuristic at worse. Then, as this kind of focus on gay tragedy gets tropified into the fundamentals of the entire gay experience in fiction, it unproductively feeds into this assumption I don’t like that the most noteworthy thing about having a gay character or gay relationship around in a story is pointing out how different and at odds being gay is with the heteronormative society at large. While self-hate, disgust, and anxiety over endless rejection can be aspects of “being gay” for people, they aren’t the only problems in gay people’s lives, and I don’t want creators to ignore other problems and sources of drama in a gay character’s life because being gay in and of itself is seen as a big enough problem already.

I want to make it super clear though that, while I don’t have a problem with representing the hardship and struggle of gay individuals in society if that’s what you want to explore in your work, I do have a problem with those things becoming across the board tropes. As the negative experiences of being gay become something you “have to include” for the sake of a genre, it becomes hard to separate 1) someone including them in a fic because they want to genuinely explore adversity, 2) someone only including them as a quick nod to suffering to put themselves in the moral high-ground before they spend the next 90% of the fic objectifying the gay characters, or 3) someone who included them because they mostly see gay relationships represented this way in fiction and think that’s it, that’s the entire gay experience right there, nothing but tears and living on the edge two steps from tragedy and utter rejection by loved ones and society every single second of every single day. 

I’m going to veer off a little more on this tangent and say that, as far as gay representation goes, I’m not even sure if focusing on suffering accomplishes a ton beyond reinforcing that idea that being gay will always be wrong and always be punished. Nowadays, instead of going on in detail about how much gay people suffer for being gay, how they’re victims of the big, bad world, folks ought put more active effort into letting actual homophobes know they’re wrong for being assholes. Actual homophobes don’t care that they made someone cry or suffer or give up on life. They think a gay person deserves to feel bad. They literally do not care who they hurt because they believe gay people deserve to hurt and suffer on some level for being gay. Harping on gay suffering reaffirms these hateful people’s beliefs that being gay is wrong and bad, because if it were right and good, then gay people wouldn’t be punished so much, right? I don’t want to contribute to that. My self-indulgent fanfics where I just write about cartoon people liking each other aren’t where I choose to make my biggest stand against the homophobes of the world. I might be wrong, who knows, but I don’t labor under any kind of assumption that the homophobes of the world are reading my fics to begin with and are going to learn to not be homophobes from me. I assume, if anything, that most people who read my fics are gay or at least accepting enough to not let a gay relationship turn them off of a fic. So, I write what I want about overpowered Hunters who live at a level of societal freedom and privilege I’ll never personally experience, because that’s the fantasy of freedom and power I sort of get out of it.

How all of my changing and shifting opinions manifest in my work is still developing and always will be developing. There isn’t much else to say on it, so now, I’m just going to address the example fics you mentioned and try to clear up any misunderstandings there. Please keep in mind I don’t blame you if you misinterpreted anything. If you misunderstood the intention of a fic, then I might’ve just written it poorly in the first place. I’m not perfect, and I write everything up pretty quickly, so, it’s totally feasible to me that what I think I’m writing down in the moment doesn’t always match what readers take away.

My intentions in the works you’ve mention, as I saw them while writing

I’m going to be upfront and just say that yeah, my most recent fic with a ship, Caveat Venditor, is basically me just throwing out gay suffering tropes because I was in too turbulent of a place last year to give myself permission to write a lot of suffering and discrimination. Also, Zepile discovering how terrifying Nen is and his own potential for using it just felt like a much bigger deal. I admit I wrote the fic too quickly and should’ve explicitly included the fact that Mizai already knows Zepile is gay the whole time, because he vetted Zepile for the mission (but I think I also didn’t want it to come off like Mizai only was interested in Zepile because Zepile was gay? If that makes sense?). In fact, it’s Mizai the one who gradually brings them together romantically, because I headcanon that Hunters overcome all obstacles to get what they want, even if the obstacle is their own better judgement reminding them they’re going on a death cruise in about a year and getting a boyfriend before that can only end in tears. So yeah, Mizai suggests the fake dating, and he’s the one who slips and comes out to Zepile. Then, in the end, he’s the one who enlists Leorio to contact Zepile on his behalf. Meanwhile, until Mizai confesses, Zepile is just kind of perplexed by him but doesn’t automatically assume anything deeper towards himself from it. He’s kinda biased and assumes Mizai’s just weird because Hunters Gotta Be Weird. Seeing how his first attempts to be open with Mizai about his criminal past blew up in his face, Zepile’s usually trying to sound out Mizai’s potential biases or motives whenever Mizai says or does something that seems to hint maybe Mizai isn’t an asshole and maybe isn’t even straight. If Zepile does feel a twinge of emotion back towards Mizai before Mizai confesses, he’s spending the most of the fic just like, “you don’t like Mizai, you just love how safe and not terrified of Nen you feel when he’s around, shut up”. 

Beyond that, though, the only people who saw these guys “dating” were rich eccentrics at a flesh collectors’ party, and if those folks had anything to say, they kept it to themselves, because Zepile was invited personally by the hosts, who are very powerful and potentially dangerous people to offend. Meanwhile, everyone who knew Mizai already assumed the date had to be fake. For the rest of Zepile and Mizai’s other public interactions in the fic, there’s nothing inherently gay about two men eating a meal or getting a drink together as far as I know. 

As for Preserved in Jars, that fic isn’t about being gay in any way. It’s not even romantic, in a sense that no-one falls in love in it. The reason Kurapika and Leorio don’t have specific qualms about being gay is because they’ve been involved before. In that fic’s timeline, Kurapika already chose his mission over Leorio. At the worst, their current mission is just dredging up old feelings. Before writing PracExp, I often employed this kind of dynamic where Leorio and Kurapika had been involved before and broken up. PracExp itself ended up being a fic where I worked out a potential process for how that kind of backstory might’ve played out. It was a whole thing I had going on leopika-wise back when I started writing it.

As for Practical Experience, well, this is where I’m the most confused by your ask. I do agree that in the specific occasions you listed, I didn’t focus heavily on the reaction of people around the characters, or on anyone’s internalized homophobia. I get the impression, however, that with PracExp overall, you might’ve specifically gravitated towards moments where you personally thought characters ought to reflect more about how the world perceives them, and you missed other points in the same fic where I made it obvious homophobia absolutely exists in that universe. My fics can be subtle, yes, but PracExp was almost too on the nose at times for me, to the point that some scenes made me personally uncomfortable to re-read, since I wrote from what I knew. I apologize if I wasn’t clear enough in what I wrote, and perhaps it’s my fault because I avoided being direct out of my own feelings of discomfort with the subject of explicit homophobia, particularly internalized homophobia and feelings of shame/disgust.

I do want to point out that most characters and general background people were supposed to sort of know Leorio was teaching Kurapika to date. Even Neon knew about it. Anyone near Kurapika and Leorio during a practice date would’ve heard Leorio lecturing about dating and Kurapika referring constantly to a girl. Any homophobic reaction to that would’ve either been by someone not paying attention, or someone so insecure they have to call out anything that even vaguely looks gay around them. I decided that neither of those types of people were worth the airtime or effort to showcase in my fic.

I did go re-read the Pairo chapter for you, since that one is easy to find. For that scene, I guess you have to keep in mind these are kids, and kids don’t articulate feelings in the most diplomatic or clear-cut ways. Pairo, though more sensible than Kurapika, hasn’t developed romantic attraction to anyone, and he’s uncomfortable and scared of someone expressing interest in him in that way. Just a few weeks before, Pairo and Kurapika were flicking past the page with the “normal” straight couple kissing on it as if direct, sustained contact with such concentrated cooties-energy would burn away their retinas. Therefore, when Kurapika steals a kiss from Pairo, Pairo’s initial reaction is to treat Kurapika like Kurapika’s messing around, like Kurapika was just doing some stupid impulsive thing that Pairo wants him to never, ever try again. Pairo then literally calls the two of them kissing “weird”, and Kurapika gets the impression Pairo is mad at him because Pairo’s not open to treating the kiss as casually as Kurapika’s defensively trying to pass it off as being. Pairo later only starts crying when he sees how upset Kurapika honestly is after Pairo has rejected his offer to try to kiss him again and has made it super clear he’s seriously uncomfortable with it. Pairo doesn’t want to lose his friend, who, even if Pairo’s not in love with him, is still one of the most important people in Pairo’s life. Even though Kurapika just got his heart broken, he has to go over and comfort Pairo and reassure him they’re still going to be friends after, because their friendship is more important than his unrequited feelings. That’s the crux of the scene. Layering in overt disgust seems unnecessarily cruel on top of the sound rejection, and it also seems something Pairo and Kurapika might’ve had a lot more trouble getting over. If Pairo had been a homophobe who thought Kurapika was super gross and morally wrong for kissing him, they probably couldn’t have still been friends after that.

A conclusion I guess

On that point last point with the Pairo chapter, and stepping away from specific fic examples, I do have a tendency to be rather kind to my characters, if that makes sense. I don’t like to see them suffer, and I’m too empathetic/sympathetic with suffering from discrimination/bigotry/etc to bring myself to put them through it “on camera” (so to say) without a good, story-specific reason for it. I kinda don’t like to write problems I can only relate to and not help mend or overcome in some way. It feels like I’m just writing it to remind myself and everyone that life can suck, and that’s it, there you go. In real life confrontations, you’re either in a position where you or others feel safe and powerful enough to tell a homophobe to stop being an asshole, or you aren’t. If everyone in the room agrees with you when you put a homophobe down, all you all end up doing is patting yourselves on the back for putting an asshole in their place within the relative safety and security of your home turf. That’s why in fics, I guess, it feels to me like pointing out every minor instance of homophobia without a plot or character reason is me just giving homophobes a podium without any resolution, or even if I do hit back, it’s just taking them down on my home turf for an audience that automatically agrees those assholes deserve it. While I hate homophobes, I’m not motivated to vindictively take them down in a fanfic because “fuck them that’s why”. It’s just not how I cope. My fics aren’t about serving folks what’s coming to them to make me feel better after they’ve stepped on me, nor am I trying to write a guideline for people how to confront homophobia in their own lives. Maybe if I felt I were writing for more of a mixed audience that needs to learn how to recognize homophobia, I’d throw in a few more incidents and lessons about the gay experience, since I’d feel more as if I had a responsibility to represent the reality of the gay experience to people who don’t already know. 

Considering the power dynamics between Hunters and normal people, however, it’d be a little harder to pull that off in my style of HxH work where I’m just writing about Hunters doing Hunter stuff. Hunter’s don’t represent anyone’s reality, gay straight or otherwise. Even if a homophobic Nen user attacks a Hunter for being gay, it eventually just becomes a Nen battle, unless you’re trying to convey that being gay itself somehow makes someone way better or way worse at Nen than straight people. That’s a wild concept, and you do you if that’s what intrigues you, but just keep in mind that gay people are more than “just” gay sometimes. Everyone who fits under a label society gives them is more than just that label sometimes.

In the end, though, I don’t personally know demographic statistics on who reads fics, much less who specifically reads my leopika stuff. Maybe I should be inserting more of the ugly reality of being gay in a not-so-accepting society? I have no idea. If any of my readers are deeply unhappy with me for having avoided blatant homophobia or darker aspects of the gay experience in my fics, let me know, and I will try not to leave that stuff out as severely as I did in Caveat Venditor, at least. That fic was absolutely an experiment in another way to write gay characters, particularly two older men, one of whom is a tried and tested superhuman. So like, I get it if that didn’t work. You probably can’t expect me to write anything more direct than PracExp, though. There’s only so much I can handle emotionally. If PracExp let you down, then for my own health and happiness, I could just switch completely over to gen fics and be content.