#I seriously should appear in this meme

[redthemarten]

Such a cute idea! qAq Wrio is going to be so happy that he can show off his muscles, hehe. Silly boy

The Duke seems to be very pleased with the costumes... at least until he's faced with a very suspicious-looking can of "spinach". He starts to bicker with Miss Sigewinne. As you wait for them to finish, Monsieur Neuvillette approaches you and hands you some Credit Coupons, signaling subtly that you can go now - this might take a while...

[local-hellhound-steals-spaghetti]

could you speak more to the point you made about seals in your post about moo deng? i see a lot of videos of seals at aquariums and want to know like, bad things i should be looking out for. thank you for your thoughtful writeups!

Thank you for your question! It's just a pet peeve I've had about people "dog-ifying" seals so they ignore a lot of behaviours that are indications of stress or aggression. And as long as it's memeable the facility's conditions aren't questioned.

Like this:

That water is absolutely filthy and belly slapping (unless it's a cued behaviour) is a threat display. But these videos seem to still be considered acceptable meme content...

A lot of "funny seal videos" are of unsafe wildlife interactions, like divers allowing seals to chew on their gear or people letting their dogs chase and interact with seals. Because seals appear more dog-like and is cute, they are more "meme-able".

A big example of this is Neil the seal, a juvenile elephant seal demonstrating a disturbing level of habituation towards humans and, as he's grown up, is also showing signs of hormonal aggressive behaviour towards things like traffic cones, in preparation for future fights against other elephant seals for territory.

Because he's become a meme though, no one is taking his behaviour seriously and people get way too close to him, despite it being illegal to do so. He shows aggression towards to authorities trying to move him off the road and away from danger as well.

Marine mammal experts had to stop sharing his location so people would stop tracking him down to shove a camera in his face for their viral videos

His aggressive displays are still laughed off as "Neil just being silly and having fun" - but it won't be funny when he's a full grown elephant seal male body slamming cars and fences down. He has been relocated several times and continues to come back because he's been habituated so throughly by the locals.

That's a threat display. He's not a dog. jfc. This guy was even hosing Neil down with water, which was reinforcing enough that he kept coming back.

Remember who else got lots of memes for being so "iconic"?

Yeah.... Poor Freya. She just was looking for a place to haul out and rest and people wouldn't leave her alone.

But the reason why I feel this is similar to Moo Deng, is because she's also having stress and threat displays distilled to "haha she's so mad" memes.

lol it's so funny how mortified she looks..... probably because she's a baby being constantly poked, chased, prodded, picked up, hosed and harassed when she should be hanging out with her mother in peace.

Neil is showing threat displays and aggression, but being ignored and memed into obilivion.

Seals are unfortunately more vulnerable to social media hype, as well as any animal the public deems as cute and "marktable".

[edenesth]

Cheat Codes and Heartstrings

"Oh, dude, what are you doing here? Weren't you supposed to be on a date?" Wooyoung asked, raising an eyebrow at his friend's unexpected appearance at their gaming hangout—a plan Yunho had bailed on to be with his girlfriend.

The taller man sighed, pulling out the empty chair and dropping into it. "She cancelled. Said something important came up, so she couldn't make it. Guess we're gaming now."

Mingi smirked, fingers flying across the keyboard as he struggled to talk while focusing on his ongoing Valorant match. "Told you, man. Nothing beats our bond, not even girls. Bros before hoes, always."

San scoffed, tossing a chip at him from across the table, offended on behalf of his loving partner, who was currently at home baking his favourite brownies while waiting for him. "Yeah, yeah. You're just salty you don't have a girlfriend."

"Yeah right, simp," Mingi rolled his eyes.

Wooyoung snickered. "Nah bro, he's not salty about not having a girlfriend. He's just salty because Yunho betrayed his moral loyalty and fell in love with someone else."

"Shut the hell up, Woo," Mingi shot him a side glare before his friend could fire back with their never-ending bromance joke, muttering a curse as he lost his game. He quickly switched over to League of Legends. "Anyway, you showed up at the perfect time—DoraTheDestroyer's playing today."

That got Yunho's full attention. He immediately perked up, scrambling to log into his Steam account. "No way, seriously? Is she actually here?"

DoraTheDestroyer—the most famous female gaming legend in this part of Seoul—had crushed all LOL players and held the top spot for ages. People often wondered why she hadn't gone pro. Few knew what she really looked like, as she preferred to stay under the radar, slipping in and out of cybercafes in her signature black Adidas windbreaker and cap. She always played in the VIP section, away from the regulars.

"Yeah, she's here. Probably for the weekly tournament, though we all know she never accepts invitations to the national championship," San confirmed, nodding toward the VIP section. The doors were closed, but through the small window, they could glimpse her trademark outfit. "Such a waste of good talent."

"Tell me about it." For a moment, Yunho forgot about his girlfriend, his face lighting up at the sight of the female gamer's familiar profile picture—a popular meme of Tyler the Creator dressed as Dora the Explorer.

"Holy crap, I can't believe we finally get to play against her," he grinned, his heart racing with excitement. He'd been waiting for this moment for a long time. As much as the Korean gaming community hyped her up, he needed to experience her skills firsthand—and get beaten by her—to fully believe she was that good.

Mingi chuckled, flexing his fingers as they geared up for the match. "You should probably thank your girlfriend for cancelling. Turns out it was a blessing in disguise."

The match began, and right away, the female gamer's team took an aggressive stance, pushing hard against their defences. But the guys weren't going down without a fight. They called out positions, planned counters, and slowly gained ground.

At first, it seemed like they were evenly matched. Yunho even managed a few key kills that had him grinning in satisfaction. "Well well, looks like we've got a shot," he said, feeling the adrenaline surge. The game was neck-and-neck, the score swinging back and forth as both teams traded victories in intense skirmishes.

But then, as the match wore on, something shifted. The legend had been quiet for a while—too quiet. Just when they thought they had her pinned, she'd slip away, regrouping with her team in ways that left them scrambling to defend their positions. Her map awareness was on another level, and her timing, impeccable.

Mingi caught on first. "Wait… she's playing us. She's luring us into traps."

It became clear she wasn't just good—she was a strategist, always two steps ahead. The moment they thought they had control, her team would come in for a devastating coordinated attack, wiping them out with perfect synergy. Her ability to manipulate the battlefield, vanish when needed, and strike when least expected left them speechless.

The final battle was the most intense, and for a moment, it looked like Yunho's team might actually pull off a victory. They fought tooth and nail, but in the end, her team made a flawless, surgical final push. The defeat was swift, calculated, and undeniable. And as expected, she emerged as the MVP of the match once again.

Yunho leaned back in his chair, breathing heavily. "She's amazing," he said, awe-struck.

His friends sat in stunned silence, nodding in agreement, still processing the sheer level of skill they had just witnessed.

"Well," Mingi finally spoke, running a hand through his hair. "That was something else."

Yunho was still trying to process the insane skills he had just witnessed. DoraTheDestroyer wasn't just a legend in the community; she was a master tactician. Her stealth, her timing—it was on a level he hadn't even imagined. His heart was still racing from the match when his phone buzzed, the screen lighting up with a message from his girlfriend.

'Sorry for bailing earlier, Yuyu :((( I just got done, let's meet and I'll make it up to you, okie? <3' — beautiful✨

He stared at the text for a moment, his thumb hovering over the screen. Normally, he'd be up in a flash, eager to meet her. But this time, he stayed seated, his mind still reeling from the game. Wooyoung, who had caught a glimpse of the message, nudged him. "Bro, aren't you going?"

Yunho bit his lip, feeling conflicted. He cared about his girlfriend, but something about what had just happened stuck with him. "This won't do, guys," he said, shaking his head. "I have to convince her to join the national championship. She's too good to be just playing for fun like this. She'd make South Korea proud."

Mingi looked over at him, surprised. "Dude, you're serious?"

Yunho nodded firmly. "She's the real deal, man. If anyone can dominate on the national stage, it's her. I have to try."

He pushed himself off his seat, spotting the female gamer moving to leave the VIP section. "Here goes nothing," he gulped, steeling himself as he approached the figure. She was masked up, her cap pulled low, and walked swiftly toward the cybercafe's exit, ignoring the stares that followed her, just like she always did.

"Wait, miss!" he called out, his heart racing as her steps faltered, but she didn't turn to face him. His friends watched intently, along with all the others in the cafe, curious about what he was about to do.

"Look, I just wanted to say how incredibly talented you are. I don't understand why you haven't gone pro yet, but you need to! I promise you will have my full support, along with all the guys here!" he declared, urgency creeping into his voice. There was a pause, and the room fell silent, everyone holding their breath.

Slowly, she turned around, her head still lowered, the cap obscuring her face. "If I do, will you forgive me?" she replied softly.

Yunho blinked, momentarily speechless. "Wh-what...?" His jaw dropped as she finally removed her cap and mask, revealing...

"Babe?" he gasped.

A chorus of disappointed groans swept through the crowd of amateur gamers, who were heartbroken to finally learn the identity of their goddess—and that she had a boyfriend—one who was just as attractive as she was. The revelation sent murmurs rippling through the room, and a collective sigh of annoyance echoed from the guys, realising their beloved idol was taken.

You nervously bit your lip as you watched your boyfriend stride toward you, each step purposeful. He cupped your face in his hands, his gaze intense as he muttered, "God, I didn't think it was possible to love you even more than I already do."

The crowd quickly dispersed, returning to their games, envious out of their minds.

You beamed at his words, reaching up to cover his hands with yours. "Does this mean I'm forgiven?" you asked hopefully, but his grin took on a sly edge as he leaned in to whisper in your ear, "You wish, baby. It's going to take a lot of making up for that."

Your cheeks flushed at his teasing, warmth spreading through you as he wrapped a possessive arm around your back, guiding you out of the male-dominated space. Stepping outside, you felt excitement and apprehension, knowing that your journey to make amends for keeping your identity a secret was just beginning.

As you walked together, Yunho couldn't help but stare down at you, still trying to process everything. He was in awe. The sweet, innocent girl who had always been at the top of her class and earned "Employee of the Year" at work was also a badass gamer who commanded the virtual battlefield. "Why didn't you just tell me who you were?"

You sighed, leaning into his embrace. "I'm sorry... I know this probably sounds stupid, but I didn't want you to see me differently. What if you didn't like the version of me you just saw? What if—”

"Are you kidding? It is stupid. If anything, I love you even more. Do you have any idea how hot that is? DoraTheDestroyer," he murmured, shaking his head in disbelief. His tone deepened as he tightened his grip on you. "You could destroy me any day."

You blushed, realising that if you had known your gentle giant had such a naughty side, just as he didn't know about yours, you might have told him from the start.

"Maybe I will, Yuyu."

✨ Bonus ✨

"So, are you still mad at Yunho for betraying his moral loyalty?" Wooyoung teased, nudging Mingi, who was still in shock. "I mean, she's only the nation's best League of Legends player. Do you still think you could go up against her?"

The tall dork cleared his throat, blinking as if that would help him regain his composure. "I might not be able to beat her in League, but that doesn't mean I can't beat her in winning Yunho's affections."

San raised an eyebrow, his expression clearly saying, "Really, brother?"

"Fine… I guess she is kinda cool," Mingi conceded. He crossed his arms, trying to maintain a tough demeanour, but there was no hiding the admiration in his voice. "I'll let her have him if she joins the championship."

ATEEZ MASTERLIST

The idea of gamer Yunho is just so 🫦 this was supposed to be a short little timestamp but as usual, I get carried away and voila.

As always, thank you for reading and let me know your thoughts! <3

General ATEEZ Tag list:

@aurasblue @marievllr-abg @itsvxlentine @minghaoslatina @huachengsbestie01 |

@evidive @weedforthoughtz @minkiflwr @cheolliehugs @ho3-for-yunho |

@the-kpop-simp @itstheghostofmypast @vantediary @green-agent @skzline |

@sharksandminhos @writingwieny @heyitsmetonid @tinyteezer @hollxe1 |

@pandabur666 @vampzity @tournesol155 @lilactangerine @oddracha |

@haven-cove @idfkeddieishot @vic0921 @vnessalau @apriecotte |

@bangtannie7 @vtyb23 @khjoongie98 @scuzmunkie @anxiousskylar |

@bunny4yungi @zl-world

All Rights Reserved © edenesth // DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE, PLAGIARISE OR REPURPOSE.

[centrally-unplanned]

The thing about morality is that it only matters when it's real. Discussions of rules or norms for what is right or wrong are almost always, at some level, illusions, approximating reality and guiding decisions in an uncertain world - which does not make them useless, just contextual. Profaning god in your bedroom can never be “wrong” - there is no one to hear you, no one to be hurt by it. You can only show something is really wrong from the intentions of the actions and their results.

So with that out of the way, lets talk about Knives Chau - and specifically, how the comic vs the anime handled that part of the story.

Scott Pilgrim vs The Reification of Dating a High Schooler

There is an extremely pervasive meme in Scott Pilgrim discourse that our titular Scott is a scumbag. Our returning whipping boy the Kotaku article loves this idea, describing Scott’s “detestable behavior” and wondering “was it too subtle the first time about Scott being an absolute shitbag?”. There is this viral headline screenshot from an interview floating around right now riding that same line:

Which is, of course, pretty much false. Its up to you in the end, “shitbag” is a subjective description, but the story just isn’t about events that would be described that way. Its the story of a guy getting over an awful ex, hurting some people, then meeting a new person, and realizing step-by-step what it takes to be their partner and levelling up as a person each time he does. He starts off broken, and Ramona of course is just as broken - getting better is their mutual arc. And its fundamentally about relationship drama - those stakes don’t make you a scumbag lol, just clueless, unless you are terminally online and don’t know what real stakes are.

I will let O’Malley get the last word in with his quote the writer of that interview is hilariously trying to torture into his headline:

There's a bit of, like, young people see Scott Pilgrim a certain way, and, you know, there's a lot of, like, 18-19-year-old fans that are really judgmental of the character. They're like, "Oh, he's a bad person. I would never do that." But I always tell them, like, get back to me when you're 25 or 30, tell me how your 20s went. Were you a bad person? Everyone has to make choices and do things in life that maybe they're not going to be proud of later.

Scott is a scumbag the way everyone is - you yourself will likely commit similar sins; that at least seems to be the authorial intent, and I agree with it.

So how does dating Knives Chau slot into this?

Despite the memes, age, in fact, is just a number - two consenting people dating does not a sin make. The reason dating underage people is bad is because of its consequences, not the categorical imperative. So what are the consequences of dating Knives Chau in the comic?

Knives is, as a consequence of dating a guy who is simply via his age able to appear so much cooler than her peers to her, absolutely obsessed with Scott. She worships his band:

She starts aping his taste in music and interests; she slots herself into his circle of friends, who don’t relate to her, even after their breakup (often drinking her way through it):

She totally spirals after he cheats on her and leaves her, blaming everyone but him; she is wounded and hurt for months, a year, over a relationship that lasted weeks:

Knives Chau is a literal poster child for why you should not date a high schooler. She is, at every turn, emotionally not ready to date someone who is not at her own level of social development, and is deeply affected by it. It is, sometimes, played for laughs - that is the nature of the comic, everything is played for laughs, but I would have given it a bit more dramatic space myself - but over the course of the story Scott himself realizes how much of an ass he was to her, and how he didn’t take what happened seriously.

The reason I view this with charity is what Scott did to lead to this - he met a cute girl on the bus! He was deeply hurt and kind of numb in life, and found someone who was safe and easy to talk to. He never attempts to kiss her (she starts trying to kiss him which he repeatedly rejects) they don’t even hold hands, and it lasted a few weeks. He knew deep down, pretty much immediately, it was fake:

Then he met an actual person he liked, and with some browbeating from Wallace agreed to break up with her, but chickened out for a day. Then the next day he decides to break up with her, and she drops the L bomb before he can, so he instantly ends it. It is really awkward for everyone involved.

Pushing off an awkward and uncomfortable conversation resulting from a dumb decision you made on a whim for a week - god I relate to that, that’s everyone! If you think it isn’t you I think you're lying. Its why this relationship is so interesting in the comic - Scott is always one step removed from it, putting it at abeyance, and the fact that something so minor to him is so destructive to her is a really good portrait of how these kinds of things happen. Its so easy to hurt someone when you don’t even know what the stakes are, and when its coming not from malice, but from weakness. Its a very good portrayal of a bad relationship because its bad in a relatable way, even if as a story is a bit more dramatic than is typical. And its a great portrayal of how fraught age gaps can be - this bad relationship is part of what makes the comic a good story.

But its 2023, we don’t give a shit about any of that anymore!

O’Malley in the same interview discusses the cultural shift around these kind of relationships:

I felt like in this day and age, I had to provide clarity on that [relationship]. Because when I wrote the first books, I took it for granted that people would understand that dating a high schooler was a bad thing. But on the internet, in this day and age, people are like, "He's dating a high schooler. That's terrible!" Like, that's pretty much what I say on page 1 of the book. But I try to spell it out a little bit more this time.

He isn’t telling the full story though - it was bad in 2004, but not bad the way it is today. Its dubiousness was mitigated by its frequency; people were doing this kind of shit all the time. Scott Pilgrim is a bass guitarist in an indie band; fucking groupies is like built into the cover charge. Half the problem Scott has in dating Knives is that she is the wrong kind of 17-year-old - had Scott met her at 1 am in the aftermath of a Born Ruffian’s concert at the Whippet Lounge knocking down shots off the back of her fake ID, no one would have even noticed. Hell, no one does notice; there is someone who actually makes out with a drunk 17-year-old Knives Chau in the comic Scott Pilgrim, and isn’t Scott Pilgrim:

No one cares about Kim’s inebriated petting session here; that is 10% because she is a Girl and Girls Can’t Be Predators, 40% because she isn’t the main character, and 50% because Kim Pine’s dating history is not a useful proxy battleground for GamerGate-adjacent nerd culture wars in ~2014; but that is road that goes directly to hell, so let's veer back.

The point, of course, is that in 2004 this is a crime flecked with normality, something your friend would do and you would maybe just cock an eyebrow at:

Its not that in discourse today - it is radically more condemned. It is not a contextual sin, but an original sin. It underwent a process I am calling reification - where it goes from being just a shifting descriptor of reality, to a thing in itself, with a defined (reified) meaning. And to be clear, that is in a lot ways on net a good thing? The reality is that, despite everyone’s protestations, there are today thousands of 17-year-olds taking the L line out to a gig at the Brooklyn Steel and going down on a 25-year-old guy they just met in a back alley off Frost St who swears he’s a “drummer in a sick new band” that played here “just last week”, he promises, and she is having a great time, bragging to her friends about how hot his tattoo was, and then shipping herself off to Cornell next year to start on her pre-med track with barely a memory. But for every dozen of those, there is at least one person who is deeply, deeply hurt, a Knives Chau who never deserved this. The rest can have a slightly worse time, its probably worth it.

That does not make it a categorical imperative, though - the reification has masked that truth. The crime comes from the context - those other girls aren’t victims, they would laugh at you for suggesting they were. But in 2023, Scott Pilgrim Takes Off is no longer concerned with context. It is telling you, right to your face, that Scott is a bad dude. Over and over and over - jokes from the Evil League about “wow, I thought we were evil”, its not subtle.

Yet meanwhile, Knives Chau is, like, fine? She dates Scott, is totally into him, and then literally in the middle of his funeral forgets about him for Envy crashing it:

Picks up the bass and has yuri-inflected playtime with Kim the literal next day:

And less than a week later is pitching an off-broadway musical adaption of Scott’s life to a billionaire Matthew Patel - I can’t explain that okay, I’m as confused as you are.

She is mad at Scott, sure, but she is over it in a matter of days. Hell, notice how she was already a fan of the Clash at Demonhead now? There is no scene of Scott introducing her to his kind of music. He didn’t change her. By the end she is a member of his band and they are totally chill:

This is, again, about a week or two later.

Knives is not an important character in this show, way less than in the original, this is no grand sin. But I still find it very interesting: O’Malley is wrong. He “spells it out” way less in this version when it comes to the actual consequences of Scott’s actions. Everyone’s verbal condemnations are substitutes to replace the real damage his actions dealt in the comic. Scott is a better person this time, in a world that has universally agreed he is worse (still not a good move ofc). Even Scott’s moment of apology to Knives about their dating is so tepid its almost Straussian:

Its ‘frowned upon’…which is not the same thing as saying it was wrong! I don’t think this is intentional, its just funny, but its a nice capstone nevertheless.

And it had to be this way, not just for media in general, but for Scott Pilgrim in particular. Not only are sexual crimes far more reified today, but Scott Pilgrim’s sin of dating a high schooler is reified as well - its the first piece of discourse everyone encounters about it. Its the ur-debate of the franchise. The idea of actively engaging on this point, and digging deeper into it…its too hot, too controversial. Way better to shy away from it, disown it. The discourse wrote this part of the script over the course of a decade; its not something the creatives had any say in.

Honestly they should have just gone all the way - just make Knives 19. Then how tepid it is wouldn’t be a distraction anymore. Scott can just be an asshole for cheating on her, that would work fine. If you aren’t going to commit to the reality of these things, you shouldn’t bother with it at all.

[sitp-recs]

Hi! :)

Could you please do a funny/witty/bantery rec list?

Looking more so for writing tone, but dialogue would ofc also be okay!

Thank you so much x

Hi there! I have a reclist for witty!Draco, but here are some witty fics I really love. They are such fun reads I remember exactly which scenes made me laugh out loud. In terms of writing tone, 4 authors whose sense of humor always hit the mark for me are astolat, shiftylinguini, blamebrampton and iota. Enjoy!

Tense by Faith Wood (E, 3k)

Harry and Draco have sex. Very, very slowly. Seriously, this is, like, 3K of penetration.

Never Gonna Give You Up by InnerLilith (E, 5k)

Five times Harry rickrolls Draco and one time Draco gets him back.

Game On by @pennygalleon (T, 5k)

Draco blows Harry a kiss and the press goes nuts. Harry suggests they use this to their advantage.

Matched Set by astolat (E, 6k)

“No one asked you to look, did they?” Draco said, eyes glittering and intent on Harry’s face—like he’d just wiped off the years and turned back in time to when their greatest ambition in life had been to knock the other off his broom in front of the school and grab the Snitch first, before they’d both gone to war and come back with scars.

Up The by @shiftylinguini (E, 7k)

“I feel I need to point out,” Draco kissed gently over Harry’s Adam’s apple, “that this is the most Gryffindor approach to conception that could possibly exist.”

draco malfoy's substitute murder service by @oknowkiss (E, 10k)

When Harry joins the Curse Breakers shortly after his twenty-fifth birthday, he’s surprised to find himself assigned to the Department of Creatures, Cryptids, and Associated Calamities.

The Loathly Worm by Selden (E, 12k)

When Draco Malfoy is forced to go undercover among the remaining Death Eaters in the aftermath of the war, the last person he expects to find there is Harry Potter.

Party of Two by fireflavored (E, 13k)

Drinking, sex, and a total misreading of the concept of fuck buddies.

keep it down, orphaned (E, 13k)

Malfoy’s an inconsiderately loud roommate and Harry’s over it.

An Act of Kindness for One Harry Potter by a Sympathetic Draco Malfoy by 0idontknow0 (E, 15k)

As Draco leaned on the wall to wait for them to get dressed, he could not help feeling like he had done a very kind thing by disrupting them. Someone should give Potter a better rogering than that sorry sod had. The man had saved the bloody world—okay, mostly Europe—the least someone could do was give him a proper shag.

Stupid Love by @the-sinking-ship (E, 17k)

Harry Potter, how does Draco Malfoy hate thee? Let me count the ways.

Heartlines by @sorrybutblog (T, 22k)

Just as Draco Malfoy's life seems to be getting back on track, the magic at Malfoy Manor is spinning out of control. Auror partners Harry Potter and Angelina Johnson are assigned to the case and quickly find that nothing about the situation is obvious. The flare ups are unpredictable at best, downright dangerous at worst, and why has a Hogwarts first year gone missing at the same time?

Little Red Courgette by blamebrampton (T, 31k)

When this season's purple courgettes are woefully thin, Draco Malfoy thinks it amounts to small beans. Next thing he knows, the Department of Standards is over-run with leeks, Brussels sprouts all sorts of legislative difficulties, and somebody appears to have put a roquette under Harry Potter. Can Draco seize a marrow victory? Or will his plans for peas be squashed?

Clouds That Veil the Midnight Moon by @drarrytrash (E, 36k)

According to Harry’s personal narrative regarding the incident, he’d hooked up with Draco Malfoy for purely self-destructive reasons, or out of convenience, or by some unlucky accident. Looking at him, sprawled in the moonlight, Harry is devastated to recall that he’d hooked up with Draco Malfoy because he’s hot.

Bite Me, Hate Memes by pir8fancier (E, 44k)

Draco Malfoy is incensed to realize that someone is trying to usurp his position as the premier Harry Potter hater.

Rookie Moves by peu_a_peu (E, 75k)

Aurors Potter and Malfoy crack the case.

The Liars Department by @dorthyanndrarry (T, 103k)

This is a story about Harry meeting up with Draco Malfoy four years after the war. And a story about Harry, well, not hating his job per say, but it's not like he has much to compare it to and it seemed fine. His whole life seemed fine. Then Malfoy came along with and his flashy suits and fast car making everything seem dull in comparison, and Harry... Harry couldn't just leave well enough alone.

[walpu]

walp walp hear me out

remember that trailblazer scene with firefly and how she just just gets stabby stabbed by the creature (memory zone meme i think)

and + Aventurine having access to the 'real' dreamscape, combine that with bodyguard! reader who will go through hell and back to make sure Aventurine will. Live.

reader follows aven during the entirety of the Penacony quest, including when Black Swan teleports the both of them to the real memory zone. (also, does anyone else feel like bodyguard! reader and Trailblazer would be besties... no, just me?)

now, keep in mind, Aven and reader have a... complicated bond. IPC workers here and there say their dating, the Trailblazer has straightup asked if they would just get a room (you get their vibe, you can go along with the secret assassin! bodyguard! reader req i sent in)

a little bit more insight on their dynamic (again, going with the assassin reader thing, its already known between the two atp, so this can be set after that period), Aven wants to love reader, wants to hold them close, and wants their affection, but dammit, he just cant bring himself to. Not when he's sure he'll just hurt everyone that comes close to him (his sister, cough cough)

and reader has the same mindset, they love Aven, as a boss, as that annoying but endearing friend, and perhaps as more. But they have blood, the lives of people that they've unlawfully taken, not to mention, they are 100% sure Aven would never love a person who killed just for monetary income.

now, here's where the real show starts. There's also another assassin (seriously, Duke Inferno should save his manpower) following reader and Aven. Safe to say, only one is making it out alive. How the assassin followed the two of them? No fucking clue, but somehow it does.

After i assume beating the living shit out of hordes of memory zone monsters, the assassin appears, and just when Aventurine's unsuspecting?? Boom, goes in for the kill.

Yeah, too bad. Aven's not dying. But reader is! Yeah, in a act of (cliche) protection, reader allowed themselves to be the one to suffer from the attack. (Bonus if they get decapitated, or just stabbed like how Trailblazer was by Cocolia). Aven will never forget the way that he just- watched reader's body fall, the light just gone from their eyes.

Anyways, he doesn't even get to hold their body. You just- poof into bubbles like Firefly did. The last thing he has left of his beloved bodyguard? Just a simple red earring, matching the one he wore. Nothing left.

Okay, im also going to cope here that the whole shitshow with Aven and Acheron did not happen, he returns to the room that reader had, and he just... stands there. He takes in the way that half of the room was messy, half of it was untouched. So much like them, unpredictable and just had a touch of the weirdness he loved so damn much.

(Bonus if you want a happy scenario, reader's alive and well, afterall, dying in the dreamscape doesn't kill anyone. Reader is probably smiling very awkwardly while they stare at a teary eyed Aventurine, then they make out /hj)

yay another rant, i had this idea for days, the decapitation part may or may not have been plaguing me (should i be concerned), anyways, thanks for listening to my word vomit, stay safe and stay healthy <33

feel like falling on my knees and begging to forgive me for taking so long this spring doesn't let me breath istg. I've got this request before 2.1 and only got to it now that's why Aven is ghosting me.

bodyguard!reader "dying" in the dreamscape to protect Aventurine

sort of a sequel to this but can be read as a separate work as well, the main thing you need to know is that reader was originally an assassin sent by Duke Inferno but they've changed their mind and stayed by Aven's side

notes - gn!reader, angst, unestablished relationship, no beta

You both knew the trip to Penacony would be difficult. You, in particular, knew that something big and very sinister is coming, judging by the way Aventurine danced around the subject, not giving you full information.

You may not know all the details of Aventurine's plan but you know him well enough to realize that he's planning on doing something extremely reckless and dangerous.

So you do your best to protect him. To shiels him from any possible danger, to keep him within your reach.

Of course Aventirune notices. How can he not notice when he already keeps his eye on you most of the time anyway. And just as you're trying to look out for him, he wants to looks out for you.

This mission already could be considered suicidal and he doesn't want you to be caught in this. Better to keep you in the dark, away from it.

Yet he can't help but selfishly enjoy your attention, your tenderness. You go out of your ways to make sure he's fine and he feels so undeserving of it. How can you be so kind when he's keeping so much from you?

You've seen him at his worst and you've stayed. You've proven so many times that you care for him not because it's just your job, not because of his money or status but because it's him.

He still struggles to believe in it sometimes. When he feels doubtful , he rubs his cheek against your shoulder in a playful cat-like manner and watches your reaction. Amusement you're trying to hide. Adoration you can't hide.

How can he doubt you? You're the one who should be doubting him.

He wants to melt into you, to be even closer than the two of you already are, but how can he love you without putting you in danger? Without draining your luck, without cursing you?

Sometimes he sees the same struggles in your eyes. When you carefully trace his face with the tips of your gloved fingers, your gaze sometimes lowers and you pull your hand away, as if you're ashamed.

But of what, of what? The blood on your hands? He has it too!

He wants to tell you this, to hold you tight, to never ever let go. The wish is so primal that everyone else can see. The memokeeper giving him a knowing smile as soon as she sees you two together, the masked fool taunting him about the only one willing to listen to him being his loyal dog ("though, judging by the way you look at them, little peacock, you're the one on the leash here~" she says. It feels like even a lower blow than the comments about his past. At least he expected those, but being taunted about his obvious feelings for is new), mx. Stellaron asking you two to get a room with a deadpun expression.

The worst one is the doctor though. Asking Aventurine to focus on the mission, then, in a softer tone, suggesting to tell you more about the plan. "It's foolish to keep it from your most trusted person, gambler. In the end, it may hurt them even more than your obsessive concerns".

If Ratio of all people gives you relationship advice you're doing soooo bad.

Yet Aventurine can't bring himself to listen to his words. He wants you safe and well, and he's sure (he's not sure) he's doing the right thing.

And yet he's wrong. He can't shield you, he can't. One of the richest people in the IPC, one of the Ten Stonehearts, the blessed one, yet he can't protect the one he loves no matter how much he tries. He's cursed, doomed, isn't he?

Damned Duke Inferno. He's dead, annihilated, and yet, somehow, one of his wretched dogs, his sneaky little assassin, finds you two in the depths of the memory zone. Such dedication to the cause!

There are two gunshots. Inferno's little rat and you strike at the same time. Them, aiming at Aventurine, and you, aiming at them. Only one bullet reaches it's target though.

It all happens so fast. You react immediately, covering Aventurine with your body. You move instinctively at the same second you shoot.

When their bullet hits you, you don't even feel it. Maybe because it's still a dreamland? The pain just won't come even though your back feels like it's on fire. You don't understand it yet but your body already starts disappearing.

All you can focus on is Aventurine's wide shocked eyes. His beautiful, beautiful eyes.

You smile weakly at him. That's all he can see before you're gone. He doesn't even have time to reach out to you, to hold you. As if he ever had the privilege of holding his loved ones in their final moments.

You just poof into the blue bubbles.

He rushes into the real world, in your room, praying to any deity that may here for you to be alive and well. It was a dream, not a real world. You can't die in a dream, not really. You weren't even killed by the memory zone meme, surely you're fine!

Yet you're not. You're not here, not anywhere in the hotel. You're truly gone.

He feels everything and nothing at the same time.

Of course, of course, of course he wasn't able to protect you!

How lucky he is, he has avoided death once again! His beloved died to protect him but he has survived! He's so blessed, truly, so blessed!

He finds himself on his knees, on the verge of hysterical laughter. The only thing you left behind is a small red earring he has gifted. And he clatches it so tightly his hand bleeds. Perhaps the pain is the only thing keeping him sane at this moment.

It feels like a cruel joke. It doesn't feel real, it shouldn't be real.

Wait... That's it! It isn't real. It's impossible to die in a dream! It was his theory all along, after all. It must be true. You just can't be dead, you can't, not you too.

His plan hasn't changed, he tells Ratio when he comes to check on Aventurine. He just needs to reach the real Penacony. To reach it and to find you there. You're strong and brave and so wonderful. You're out there somewhere, he just needs to help you to get back to the real world.

He holds into that idea like a madman. It doesn't matter how dangerous it is. It never did, to be honest. But now it's like he can't focus on anything else.

He hasn't feel so despaired in years. He just needs to find you, everything else is meaningless.

So when it's time for the final act, he gets on stage, fears not and doesn't look back.

He still holds his hand behind his back though. Clutching your earrings for dear life.

[akookminsupporter]

ARE YOU SURE?!: MY THOUGHTS ON THE EIGHTH EPISODE AND THE SHOW IN GENERAL

I know I might be sounding a bit repetitive, but I seriously can’t believe AYS is over. When it was announced and we saw it would last for weeks, it felt like such a crazy long time, but now it seems way too short. It’s just not fair! I want more!

The last episode was the perfect depiction of that final day of your holiday—one you don’t want to end for a million reasons. For Jimin and Jungkook, that last day was their last ‘Freedom Day’ (dramatic, I know!), so it makes sense that it felt a bit melancholic.

I have no doubt that Jimin and Jungkook are just like they were in AYS in their private lives. Even with cameras around, they felt more natural, more themselves. AYS didn’t feel like a show made for us; it felt like they were entertaining themselves and just decided to share it with us.

I loved the last episode because, as I’ve said non-stop these past weeks, I adore how relaxed it was. The slow pace of everything they did, the lovely domesticity—it’s honestly the main reason I love AYS so much. In this last episode, they seemed more laid-back, and Jimin appeared a bit more melancholic, which is totally understandable. I loved that they got to watch the first episode of the show and laughed as much as we did watching them have fun together.

They really tried all sorts of food on the show, and honestly, I hope they paid for it all with the agency's card, haha!

Jimin and Jungkook are incredibly similar in so many ways, yet also different—they’re uniquely the same if that makes sense. They get each other’s jokes, meme references, video clips, and songs. They understand each other's looks and unspoken words; it’s amazing to see. AYS showed us why they never get bored of each other and why they often say they spend hours talking. While others take a break or rest, they’re off playing, chatting, and laughing together. That’s why AYS didn’t feel forced or like just another job for them. It explains why they obviously enjoyed making the show and why they decided to keep filming after they wrapped in the US, even though that wasn’t the original plan. It also explains their comments about wanting to do something similar in the future—12 more seasons, according to Jungkook!

AYS didn’t confirm that they’re a couple or that they’ve been married for 40 years with 30 kids, but it definitely reaffirmed just how close Jimin and Jungkook are. It showcased how different their dynamic is compared to their relationships with other members, especially when Tae was around. If there’s one thing that should be clear after this, it’s that. The fact that they chose to enlist together should be the biggest confirmation of all, but I know for many, that’s still not enough.

AYS was perfect in every sense, from start to finish. I would’ve loved for them to talk a bit more about their decision to enlist together and even about making the show, but then again, it’s Jimin and Jungkook, and there are things they’ll never discuss. It’s frustrating, understandable, and a bit funny all at once.

I’m really going to miss waiting every Thursday for a new episode. I’m going to miss seeing all the different reactions to the same clips on my timeline. I’ll miss the comments on everything new they did and the joy of discovering another layer of Jimin and Jungkook’s relationship. But most of all, I’m going to miss Jimin and Jungkook. I reckon unless they’ve got more things planned, we won’t see them until June 2025. Sure, there are the behind-the-scenes bits and the concert DVD from Seoul, but…

The last clip we saw in the episode, the day they enlisted in the army, was a bit of a shock, and I felt it was a bit cruel of the editors to do that, haha! But at the same time, it was a realistic way to end the show because that was the conclusion of it all, right? The final destination for Jimin and Jungkook. The lovely thing is, they made that journey together, and even after that ending, they’re still together.

I can’t wait to see Jimin and Jungkook in 2025. I’m so curious to see how their dynamic changes after military service. I feel like if they were unbearable together before, they’ll be even more so after!

All I can say is thank you. Thank you, Jimin and Jungkook, for such a beautiful gift. AYS confirmed that seeing you happy makes me happy, and while that just highlights the parasocial relationship I have with you, I also know I’m in this for life.

I can’t wait for 2025!

Note: Here's my list of favourite episodes with links to the posts with each reaction and conclusion:

Second Episode

Sixth Episode

First Episode

Eighth Episode

Fourth Episode

Seventh Episode

Fifth Episode

Third Episode

[deathmetalunicorn1]

Teen!reader get into a detention for this meme:

Teen!Rader: I got detention

RoR characters: What happen?

Teen!Reader: The teacher point at ruler infront of the entire class and said," There is an idiot at the end of this ruler."

RoR:Then the teacher gave you detention?

Teen!Reader:...No, I got into trouble for asking, "Which end?"

How will they react? Cause, I keep imagine this scenario in my head 😅😅

Love this, it's so witty and funny.

-Thor- Couldn’t help the smallest of grins from appearing as he lifted a hand, ruffling your hair, not upset in the slightest at you. However, your teacher was going to learn that they should respect others, especially one his precious kin.

-Lu Bu- His grin was almost instant, a dark chuckle leaving him as he cracked his knuckles, “So where’s this teacher of yours? I’m gonna help get you out of detention since they wanted to disrespect you.”

-Zeus- He stroked his beard, looking amused as he chuckled for a moment before he spoke, “Very clever of you, Y/N, but I think I’m going to go have a word with this teacher. If they’re going to hand out punishments because they made a fool of themselves on their own, I should return the favor.”

-Adam- He ruffled your hair lightly, “You shouldn’t be rude to your teachers, but you’re off the hook with me, since they were rude to you first.”

-Poseidon- You see his lips purse just for a moment, like he’s trying to smile before he tells you to wait outside for him. You learn the next day that he flooded the whole school for the disrespect the faculty gave you.

-Kojiro- He chuckled warmly, patting your head, “Teachers can be harsh, but to be cruel like that, that’s not right. C’mon, I’ll get you some ice cream.”

-Hercules- He’s not smiling. He’s not smiling. He’s not- he’s smiling- a snort of laughter leaving him before he laughs out loud, holding his belly by your clever comeback.

-Jack- Instantly went to confront the teacher, demanding to know if they tried to insult you. Once you were off the hook, her ruffled your head, “Witty smart alack!” which made you giggle.

-Shiva- Oh hell no! Nobody is gonna treat his baby like that and get away from it! Your teacher was quick to learn fear and quick to learn that if they wanted to be rude, there would be consequences. Once you left, he had to pause to sit down after he started laughing so hard he couldn’t breathe.

-Raiden- Is quickly going to be on the ground, twitching from laughing so hard, hearing how easily you turned the teacher’s words on them.

-Buddha- Twitching on the ground part 2, he is crying from laughing so hard, finding it hysterical before he praised you and gave you a lollipop.

-Hades- Another scary guardian who put the fear of Hades himself into your teacher, getting a quick and harsh lesson in respect but he was proud of you for standing up for yourself.

-Qin Shi Huang- He’s chuckling first, then laughing, then crying, then laughing so hard there is no sound coming out from him until he started to gasp, holding his sides from the pain from laughing so hard.

-Beelzebub- His lips struggle to remain still but you quickly see a smile as he chuckles softly, praising you for you wit and quick response.

-Tesla- Frowns at first when he heard that you had gotten detention, but once he learns what the teacher had said to you, and what you said in response, you were off the hook, your teacher wasn’t so lucky, as he went in, demanding a meeting with the teacher and the principal, showing why, as a genius himself, that education should be treated seriously, and teachers shouldn’t be talking to students like that.

[mrborocs]

And here it is again all over again

When episode 6 of v9 came out. A certain circle of people became hysterical about Weiss' reaction to Jaune. Strangely enough, it was mostly WR fans and Bumblebee fans agreeing with them or Jaune haters. Even before the release of episode 6. Some artists and WR fans decided to make fun of Weiss' words about the beautiful knight.

Here's a meme for you about this. At first there was denial. Mostly on Twitter, of course. WR fans called it a bad joke from the writers and just trolling. Their main argument is that WK will not be canon, so we were told on Twitter. I have already said that there is no real confirmation of this.

Or they claimed that it was completely out of character for Weiss. The screenwriters ruined everything and in fact Weiss has no sympathy for Jaune!

The first battle ended with shouts, tears and crying. WK fans didn't even show up for the battle. But this does not mean that everything will just end like this. Small outbursts of indignation appeared on all sections of Twitter. In the end, WKfans began to respond, this is: the opinion of WRfans is not taken into account.

Then this happens. The first powerful blow. Where WRfans tell that objectively WK is a bad and boring ship and their opinion is not subjective. The focus is on the good guy trope. Supposedly boring heterosexual trope, when a girl rejects a good guy, and then realizes her mistake and gets him as a prize. I'll give my opinion briefly. No it's not. Jaune and Weiss at the beginning of their development were not the most beautiful characters. Both had a huge baggage of shortcomings. Jaune is an infantile and arrogant guy who wants to become famous. He is a little selfish, because he puts other people at risk with his desires. He is indecisive and weak. He can't immediately fight back against a bully. He does not see the personal boundaries of other people trying to attract attention to himself. Over time, he realizes his problems and gradually solves them. In v1-2, it was really difficult to take him seriously. This no longer fits the trope of a good guy. Just like Weiss, Jaune has changed a lot over time under the influence of other people and each other.

A typical example of toxic WRfans. The main difference between him and others is that he does not hide and does not try to say what WRfans think in a more veiled way. You have no right to wish that WK would become a canon! Others handle WK differently.

You can immediately see how WRfans began to develop the topic of other Jaune relationships. WK this is disrespectful to Pyrrhus. Jaune should actually date Neptune. Which of course is very funny. Not only that, both characters did not show attraction to men, but on the contrary. So for all WRfans arguments about WK, Neptune and Jaune are not connected in any way at all except for Weiss herself. There was only a strange rivalry between them. WKfans tried to object to something in the comments and there were quite a lot of them. Therefore, the battle ended in a draw. The parties went to the corners accusing each other of bias. WRfans didn't stop there. Deciding to attack his old enemy again. There was an attack on RG.

I didn't go into much detail, but this is something allegedly related to the sexualization of Oscar and Ruby. Suddenly, everyone started shouting that you can't do this. However, WR and bumblebee are engaged in the same sexualization. You can say that Oscar is still a child. I will object to this that the guy is already old enough to fight the forces of evil and in general this is a fictional character.

Of course, WRfans hastened to say that they are nothing here and in general they don't care about RG.

That's what WR fans really think.

Here is a rather interesting opinion about WK. Of course, she's right about something and WK has a pretty big gap in development. But their contradictory beginning, and after a sweet friendship in the background, still shows that the ship has a character and minimal interaction. While with v7, WR is very bad with development.

And here we go to the final. Finally, the last powerful blow. WRfans will show these heterosexual bastards who is in charge of this show!

Her didn't like the joke in the show. And he decided to tell everyone, calling her the most terrible. And of course, it didn't play any role here that she was WRfans. Humor is subjective, and I also don't like humor in v4, for example, when Ruby laughs at Jaune rabbit or Jaune runs away from grimm without a weapon. I didn't expect that after everything that happened to these characters, he wouldn't become at least a little serious. Although it was later fixed. If you don't like the joke, you can safely keep silent about it and not ironically attack the fans of another ship. For example, I don't like many bumblebee moments either. Although I do not sympathize with Black Sun. I could say similar things about WR, but when was the last time there was a meaningful interaction between them? There was a moment in v9 when Weiss accepted Ruby's choice when she shouldn't have. A very strange attitude of the best friends. I can't criticize WR because I'm subjective and I only see them as friends. For me, the main thing is that the ship would bring emotions to people. WR has a huge fan base - so there is something in it! In general, all normal people who enjoy their ships and do not attack others! You are beautiful!

[lizardsfromspace]

Tbh it feels like a lot of the ways folks talk about media on this site these days are super Thermian-y. But mainly as part of a ploy to essentially render criticism invalid by downplaying art's importance

Which...is kind of sad? The response to people overthinking meaning in art is not to loudly insist meaning doesn't exist and you're weird if you look for it and all that matters is if it's consistent with itself. I saw a blog continually insisting that you should exclusively see characters as "action figures to mash together" and that it's strange to take them seriously and. No, it's weird to not take your characters seriously? That inane meme about curtain colors has leaked into everything, it appears

[secretlywritingstories]

no but seriously imagine it | phan one shot

Summary: It has been 15 years since Dan and Phil met. They wake up on the Terrible Influence tour bus in Las Vegas on their anniversary with plans to see My Chemical Romance and Fall Out Boy later that day.

Word count: 2.5k

Tags: 2024!phan, reality, tour bus, sleepy cuddles, introspection, anniversary

No warnings

A/N: Happy phannie day! I hadn't planned to write something but I woke this morning with so many feels and they had to go somewhere! Despite the name, it only references the tumblr post.

Read on AO3 or below

Phil had called it fate. Dan had countered that it was a coincidence.

Yet, they formed their schedule around it.

Phil had reminded him of the meme that had been going around. Of them, My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy and Panic! At The Disco. Back when the bands were never likely to be active at the same time again and the two of them had yet to leave the closet. Clearly, just some tumblr shitpost, an emo multistan wanting to shove all of their interest into one singular moment for the heck of it. But well… all except P!ATD, they’ve kind of got a lot of cards lined up to be knocked down rather neatly.

Down to a festival with MCR and FOB being held on the anniversary of the day that him and Phil met. So, if they made sure to have that date free and be on tour right around Las Vegas, could anyone really blame them? Besides, they’re still emo and fanboys at heart too. It’s one of the reasons that they get their audience like this. They know what it’s like. They also just wanted to be at that festival for the music. A blast from the past.

Yet, it’s something strange to wake on the tour bus, assumably safely arrived in Las Vegas after the drive from Los Angeles. The two of them had stayed up late, wired from the LA show and the crew has clearly been letting them sleep in, even if they’re going to check into a hotel now.

The bed is surprisingly comfortable for a tour bus. Big enough that him and Phil can fit easily, even with their long limbs. No pretending to sleep anywhere but next to each other.

Phil is usually the first one to wake up back at home, but he’ll happily spend at least half an hour right upon waking to scroll TikTok, phone right up in his face to see without his glasses. He’ll only drop the phone if Dan snuggles close and distracts him. Lazy mornings are good.

This cannot be too lazy a morning. They need to be on the move. They’ve got plans for today. It’s a special day after all. A decade and a half. Holy shit, how is that real?

Dan snuggles close to Phil, uncaring if he wakes him. He kind of wants that to happen. Sleeping Phil is beautiful but it’s not just Phil’s appearance that Dan loves, though it is a nice bonus. It’s the mind inside of the man. The personality, the way he jokes, the way he smiles, the way he creates art, the way he holds onto Dan.

Dan was 17 years old when he clicked on an AmazingPhil video for the first time and it had felt like something clicked within him in turn. An instant obsession, he’d thought at the time. Binged all of the videos on his channel. Sat ready for the new ones to drop, so he could watch them immediately. Waited for a few months to tweet at Phil directly. Shoot his shot with this handsome emo boy with a mind so fascinating that it made Dan curious to learn more.

Because the fascination hadn’t lessened, only gotten worse. And now he knew it would only grow and grow.

Back then, he'd dreamt up scenarios of Phil replying. Scenarios of them getting together and living happily ever after. He was a lonely teenager who’d never had a best friend, and he was yearning in a way that felt like it consumed his whole being. He had seriously imagined it.

The vision he’d had ended up coming true in many ways. Maybe Dan should pride himself the psychic one instead of Phil.

Phil stirs a little as Dan pulls him into his arms. Little grunts of half-awareness, not enough to be fully awake, but he still moves closer on instinct. Arms heavy with sleep but reaching for Dan all the same.

Dan couldn’t have predicted this reality for them though. Not in his wildest dreams. YouTube had been a silly hobby for the both of them. He’d only started because of Phil. Wanted to be like him in every way back in the beginning. It was a good excuse for arranging a meet up, when it felt too big to admit that he just wanted to hang out. Be friends, lovers or maybe even something more than just romantic.

It’s because of Phil that Dan got to create so many things that he is proud of. This career that he’s not sure he’d ever have had, if it wasn’t for Phil deciding to turn on that camera back in 2007.

The career that they’ve built together is important. It has made them this life. But it’s not Dan’s favourite part. It could never be, especially when he has got Phil gradually waking up in his arms like this.

His breathing changes slowly, sleep clinging to his body as Phil clings to Dan’s, but it’s a lost cause. He’s been disturbed enough that he’ll wake now. He blinks up at Dan’s face, undoubtedly mostly seeing a blurry outline.

Yet, he smiles, because he always did have an uncanny ability to look right into Dan. It’s got nothing to do with his vision.

“You’re up early,” Phil says, only to close his eyes and snuggle closer to Dan again. Hiding his face in his shoulder and letting out a low hum.

“It’s our anniversary according to the internet,” Dan says instead of acknowledging what Phil said.

Honestly, it’s a day that they’ve just let go by without much fanfare most years. It’s a time where their audience loves to make edits and art of all kinds to celebrate the moment that Dan took the train up to Manchester and they met for the first time. That first selfie in the Apple Store where their much smaller audience was excited to see them together. Oh, the thousands of selfies that have followed after that first one.

You couldn’t have told those two kids. They couldn’t have known. Even if Dan had been hoping. For something long-lasting. For forever.

Iconic, when he struggles with commitment in so many other ways.

But never about Phil. It was strange how he was so certain about him, right from the start. Maybe he was just a hopeful adolescent, so full of yearning, but even back then, nothing had felt like finding Phil. Of meeting him, of loving him.  

“Blessed day,” Phil mutters, still clearly tired.

He makes no mention of the fact that it took them a little while longer to put a label on it, but it hadn’t mattered. Not really. Labels have always been one of Dan’s enemies. He felt like nothing could quite capture him well enough, and even now, he feels like nothing can quite capture his and Phil’s relationship still. Perhaps that’s why he’s so prone to spin so many tales and metaphors of it, still grasping for words that can finally encompass all of it.

He is not sure he’ll ever find it, but he doesn’t mind.

Not as long as Phil stays right here, while he weaves each declaration into existence.

Dan reaches down to play with Phil’s hair. Still quite pristine blond in its current condition. The bleach has been a little harder on the hair, but Phil is doing a good job not letting it get too damaged. Takes care of it with that purple shampoo and all that.

Back when they met, Phil was dying his hair black and now he dyes it blond.

Back when they met, Dan straightened his curl into submission, now he allows them to live their best hobbit life.

Dark to light, constraints to freedom. Growth even in their appearances, like all they’ve matured couldn’t help but shine out of them.

“I’m excited for the show tonight,” Phil says, eyes still closed and breathing heavy. He could slip back into sleep if Dan would let him.

“We’re not performing tonight,” Dan says, hand still moving through Phil’s hair. Petting him. He knows that’s not what Phil means but he loves to tease.

Sure enough, Phil pinches his hip. Hard. Enough to hurt really, but no touch from Phil truly hurts. It just makes Dan laugh.

“The festival. It’ll bring me back to my youth.”

“Sure, old man,” Dan says.

It earns him another pinch, this time to his thigh and fair enough, this one does hurt a little. But it stings in a nice way. Grounds him and just makes his smile widen. Phil’s hands all over him is always a good thing.

Before Phil, he was touch-starved. Still feels it creep in when they’re apart for too long. Last time he was in USA doing We’re all doomed, they had gone the longest ever without seeing each other. The touch-starvation came back full force then. Dan was pretty sure he tried to live inside of Phil’s skin when he got back.

He’s so glad they’re back on this continent together for Terrible Influence. He loved doing his solo tour, but this feels right. Not like when he kept turning around with his eyes searching for Phil on instinct.

“I will bite you,” Phil threatens.

And he would. If Dan asked real nicely.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

“Stop being horny, I’m trying to threaten you,” Phil says but his voice is dancing along the words. Way too amused for them to have any effect.

“Do you think you’ll cry? Hearing the music?” Dan asks, pulling Phil even closer. They’d be fused together soon, but he feels the chill along his spine, remembering the month where he couldn’t touch him.

The only way to starve it off is bringing himself back to this moment. Phil in his arms. Dan might never let go.

“No,” Phil says, and his voice is flat. Deadpan. But then it softens a little. “It’ll be very cool though. To have those two sharing the stage.”

“Yeah,” Dan agrees, but his mind is drifting again.

That’s the thing with collaboration, isn’t it? If you have two people, you really like, it’s only natural to want to bring them together. To see what would happen to have them side by side. Maybe they’ll enhance each other.

Like him and Phil did.

Dan is under no illusion that the two of them would be here if they’d decided to keep their private life entirely private. If they’d never done another video after that first pinof, the interest would not have grown to what it had been.

No, they bound themselves to each other in every way a human really can. Professionally, emotionally, romantically, sexually, reputationally, creatively, socially, physically.

Their very souls could be mates, if you believe in such a thing. It’s hard to remain a cynic about soulmates when you live a life like Dan does. But he will die on that hill. Maybe his and Phil’s souls are made of the same stardust, or whatever, but they are the ones who took fate into their own hands.

Dan saw Phil and reached out. Phil heard him and reached back.

He’ll not let some cosmic force take all of that from them. The cosmic force was not there when they struggled with privacy and uncertainty and all of it coming so close to boiling over. How they weathered the storm and found calmer seas again.

Even when those calmer seas made Dan was to visit land for a while. To feel the ground underneath his feet again. To have Phil be the one on the ship, and after a while, hand stretched and tempting with just a short voyage. To see what would happen.

Dan hadn’t been sure. He hadn’t trusted his own brain. But he’d trusted Phil. Believed him when he said that it would all work out.

And now they’re back on that ship and it’s faster than ever. Gliding through the waves as easily as nothing. Made stronger by all that its endured. Fifteen years on the sea.

It’s Phil’s fingertips on Dan’s chest that brings him back. Pressure, right where his heart is beating. His eyes are open now, and he’s propped himself up on the elbow. Still no glasses, so he can’t see shit, but he looks at Dan like he can.

“What are you doing?” Dan asks.

“Checking your heart, but it’s not racing. Thought maybe you were panicking.”

He can do that sometimes. In the existential crises, when the thoughts spiral too far, too deep, for him to make head or tails of it all. Phil was always the best person to bring him out of it.

“I wasn’t,” Dan answers honestly. “Just thinking about us. Nothing can panic me about that.”

Phil’s snort is telling enough.

Dan reconsiders. “Nothing can panic me about that anymore.”

“Good,” Phil says and then it’s his whole palm on Dan’s chest. Warm and alive. Steady, like the beat in Dan’s heart. “We should get up.”

He lets go of Dan to roll over to the other side of the bed and put on his glasses. He’s just thrown them on, and they’re crooked. Dan sits up and fixes them for him. Phil lets him. Habit.

He still looks sleepy and like he could melt back into Dan’s embrace. Dan might let him, if he didn’t know that soon they’ll find a knock on their door and be told they can check into their hotel room for the night.

It’ll be good to take a shower. Phil still doesn’t let anyone take a shower on the bus.

“We’re got the whole day until tonight. What do you want to do?” Dan asks.

He sees it, the way an idea flickers into Phil’s eyes. Something funny or sentimental. Dan perks up a little before he’d even opened his mouth.

“Starbucks.”

One word. Oh, so simple. But a reference all the same. That’s sentimental. And fun.

They do love a good memory. Hoards them in boxes and store them away safely to be revisited. Their history is special to them. And to their audience, who embarrassingly sometimes know the history better than themselves. They’ll never admit that though, and the audience will never see everything. Just the glimpses that they allow.

But sharing is fun. Having so many people care used to scare Dan but it doesn’t anymore. He and Phil know that they know. It’s been acknowledged and it’s only made things better.

“Sure, we’ll get you Starbucks with Dan,” Dan says and pulls the face, lips pulled taunt and just the barest hint of lifts in the corner. As square as he can make it to mimic the emoji that accompanied that tweet.

Phil tries to shove him off the bed. Fails and just falls into him instead. It ends in laughter, and tangled bodies, because of course it does.

They’ve never been able to resist getting tangled up in each other.

And it’s fitting to start the day with an old reference. Maybe it won’t be the only one today.

[z-and-the-space-child]

my head is all currently midnight burger podcast so here's everything i like about this wonderful piece of media:

it's pretty fun and very funny!! i smile like an idiot on public transport and on my way to class at least once a day listening to this.

the characters are so. idk how to describe them but theyre so full of life and you can tell that they are loved greatly by the creator(s)

the WRITING. i could seriously pluck a quote from damn near every episode to carry me through the day. i don't need affirmations i need gloria to talk me through my problems.

i was doing a lil analysis of the themes in this show and i came up with "the best thing you can ever do is the best thing you can do right now" and it is FUEL, babey.

The el triste monologue. also just gloria being a POC and being proud of herself and her culture. there's a lot of cultural mish-mash in podcasts, so this is very refreshing.

It's very, very sweet and heartfelt. kind of like wolf 359 if they communicated more instead of dodging their issues until they came to a peak (love them for it.)

the PHYSICS of it all. i'm a physics/astrophysics major because i think space and looking at the stars is my lifeblood so i won't shut up about it. i don't want ava and leif (certainly ava) to shut up about it ever. HOW much reasearch did they have to do to get this kinda grasp on it. im in awe, i'm LEARNING actual things from them. i could go on. the gravity waves, the stellar nuclear fusion, the time dilation of it all. and all without using over-flowery language!!! i can actually follow a good chunk of the time. are we sure ava didn't take one of those science communication seminars. maybe 5 phds does it. when she and leif talk i vibrate like an electron in a lazer. wonderful.

star sequencing??? stellar nucleosequencing??? right up my alley. thats my kinda stuff. the romanticization of space, i've seen. the romanticization of physics, however, is not something i haven't seen in such a beautiful modern fashion. (Ie, not oppenheimer or even richard feyman)

and it's not too science-y to the point that they think they can't have fun. yes they discuss the implications of gravity waves and wax poetic about space and pulsars. (it beats for you, berts) but they have FUN! they meet their parents because they can. they get a plant drunk. there's an atmosphere(?????) around the diner that allows them to fly around and mind-numbing speeds and look at the curvature of spacetime and also sit on the roof. (I imagine the entire place is the temperature of a summer night.) they have a whole wild west planet. leif builds things inexplicably. how? where does he get the materials??? shhhhh don't question it just let him have the gravity wave detector. nobody actually knows what engineers do, not even engineers. let him be. also time crystals??????

ALSO ava being a woman in stem and being so blunt yet covert about it. she's been dealing with it for so long. why are all (recognized) physicists a)white b) men c) both. it's such a sucky thing to work into because of the outward appearance. ava is a proud mad scientist which i aspire to so much. i am keeping her in my little arsenal of people to think about when i don't want to study. (picture the do it for her meme but it's pics of ava) I don't think i aptly put how much i love her. i'm not all the way finished yet but i've heard she was forced to marry someone? i think it would be a thing for sure if she cheated on him. so many physicists cheated on their spouses (wives ): ) and i think ava should also do it. as a treat. if that's what she'd like.

when people have done bad, bad things but show/are capable of redemption upon reflecting on their past/current shortcomings is just something that gets me so much directly in the heart. the hiddenness of people. the tragedy. we contain MULTITUDES and this show demonstrates that so well. how they support each other! they are everchanging and that's good for them. Leif the engineer the ex criminal the diner cook.

leif exploding a man in cold blood. if i could draw i'd draw that. maybe i will anyways.

food as a form of affection/way to bond. grief. doing your best. making amends. using the time you have. death is inevitable but that's okay.

And if time and tide roil you too harshly, or diurnal courses leave you with no safe havens, just remember we’re out there, somewhere, lookin’ for ya’

they open at six

[fierceawakening]

Which seriously, said it before and will likely have to say it again, but… one thing that shocked me when I started working at the shelter was just how often cops are called. Charges are not always pressed, but sometimes they are.

This was a real shock to me as a white leftist constantly reading online that poor black people never call the cops and are and should be deeply invested in community solutions and mutual aid.

It’s that more than anything that’s made me rethink views that just say blanket things about the criminal justice system. That it’s begun to seem to me that the most downtrodden people don’t necessarily avoid it.

And that if that’s true, white progressives avoiding it is at least to some degree about appearing less complicit and thus politically pure.

And I don’t think that’s the right reason to do things. So I’m much more critical of the one liner memes stuff.

Okay so the system is corrupt and it’s one of those things it’s gonna be really tough to wash the racism out of, whether we try to fix what we’ve got or try and overhaul (which will be messy and leave a lot of people to be victimized while we get the new system set up.)

We know this. What do we do for the ladies in the shelter who DO want to press charges, even though as poor black Women that’s not what the theory says they would do?

How do we protect them and take their hurt and anger seriously while the overhaul is happening?

I dunno. I just feel like a lot of this stuff doesn’t survive contact with real life very well at all, and you have to be constantly on your guard for filing off what look like stray edges but turn out to be how people sometimes actually function.

[darlingpwease]

It would be funny if the system did allow reader to become Shang Qinghua disciple and make him a father figure to them as a little treat for being the author.

Shang Qinghua would be a father who will spoil reader. Bonus points reader knows some memes because Shang Qinghua taught them.

Reader probably doesn’t take him seriously at times but is protective of him.

Reader: He may be an idiot but he’s my idiot.

Shen Yuan is probably smacking his fan at Shang Qinghua for this (or perhaps he’s jealous because reader won’t be his disciple like he expected)

shang qinghua is my lil meow meow<33 deserves to be called daddy tbh he is the author after all /hj /affectionate

creator's favourite<3

reader: wow hehe silly guy who thinks he's my dad... I love it in shifus.

♡ unhealthy behaviour, pet names, mention of violence, adoptive family themes, parent/child dynamic (and some pinning from shen yuan but you can treat it as you want); drabble + headcanons

But more seriously, SHANG QINGHUA actually looks like someone who will be a good father to his cute little darling sweetest summer baby boo that he sometimes just wants to put in a box and shake or put in the palm of his hand and watch with wet eyes, trembling.

He was doing research... And it's normal for men to get carried away with cute things... And gosh — who can say that you are his favorite character and no one can be your fan even more than he is?

(one may try to compete, but he prefers to ignore the existence of Cucumber Bro, although he admits that in some things he has a taste, especially with this cute art, similar to how he represented you, as his pfp.)

(he also puts your art on his pfp, because no one else can be your big fan.)

It's not that you are described in any way at all or look especially against the background of other characters — apart from the fact that he may be too self-indulgent when he describes you as candy for eyes whenever you appear, as if you are a character from a much better story, but what can he do??? — and your backstory may look like one of those that he created for a long time and thoughtfully, as if connecting the pieces of a puzzle, putting his mind, heart and hours into you that he could have spent sleeping instead, but!

He doesn't regret it.

Even in the morning, when he slept for only two or three hours, he does not regret that for just a few hours he said to himself, "it's okay, it's okay, just a couple more words and that's it..."

Every author should have two favorite characters in the story — one whom he wants to associate with himself (or next to whom he wants to associate) and one whom he wants to wrap in a blanket, put on his chest, kiss on the forehead and saying that they are gorgeous and beautiful. After all, for the audience, he has a beautiful cold cultivator and a fateful passionate demoness, so he can have his beautiful cold demon and his charming bright cultivator, right?

Perhaps you are not part of Binghe's harem (not his cutie!!! too precious!!! his baby can't be part of something like that!!!) and such a detailed study, which is hidden behind your description, does not make much sense, but it makes him happy, especially when he can introduce you to the narrative, briefly describe or invent what you can say. His cute little meow meow, who is Luo Binghe's senior fellow disciple under Shen Qingqiu's care (no you don't need that character development where you experience bullying!!! he has the right to be delusional in his works!!!), and tries to do something to the best of your ability, even if there is little you can really help...

... You die in a battle against demons. Although in his drafts a plan of how you actually survived, it was also not very pleasant for him to write this scene, even if it was pleasant to describe an emotionally strong reaction, — and subsequent plans for revenge and murder also had some therapeutic effect, — but no, brother Cucumber, he does not feel any pleasant feelings at all from having killed his pet! And he is not at all happy that he killed the only worthy character!!

And your death was not at all predictable because of how pure and catchy you were!!!

"... Maybe a little delusional after all," SHANG QINGHUA thinks when looks at you. Small, with a straight back and an indefinite peak, although he knows that you will become a member of another peak, and this realization for the first time causes him damage to such an extent that he wants to cough up blood. He just wants to get on knees, hug you and shake, but instead can only watch — and when the System says that he can get you as his disciple, since he has already become the head of the peak?

Yes, your participation in the plot is important, but not to this exte–

Not a word more — he doesn't hesitate for a second!

SHANG QINGHUA treats you like a mother hen with an egg, wanting to just constantly take you in arms and kiss cheeks like a proud father, and for sure he has... moments where you allow yourself some tenderness because of which he falls to the ground, covering face, as if you killed him with charm, while you look down on him — at first frowning and worried, then you just pull him up yourself.

At some point, you even begin to like it; one day you even allow yourself to call him 'father' — but when he almost has a deviation of qi from what you call him, you never do it again, even if now he definitely desperately wants to hear it again. But — no way; how will you explain to the head of Qian Cao Peak why your father shifu looks like this? It would be extremely embarrassing, especially if you still had to drag him.

No.

Never.

(you still unwittingly unconsciously call him that several times, though — and each time SHANG QINGHUA understands that if he dies right now, he will die happy.)

Your backstory is definitely the story of an orphan or an abandoned child, even if it has some noble origin, and it's hard to deny that being immediately in the adoring and pampering presence of the head of An Ding Peak, who deals with all economic affairs and supplies in the sect, being literally the peak of logistics, is a little overwhelming... at first. Someone may view An Ding Peak as useless or meaningless, but when all the supply, procurement, economic transactions are circulating around one peak, and this is not something secret...

... can't your loveable father afford to pamper his beloved child?

You were such a sweet and smart disciple who always follows him (at his request, but you could also theoretically disobey him, so he should reward you anyway!), how can SHANG QINGHUA not try to make you smile and be spoiled?

He knows how bad life was for you, he described it all himself, so he only makes amends to you, even if you definitely do not know because of whom in some sense you had such a past, but only look at him as a parental figure who is always ready to help, protect and pamper you. SHANG QINGHUA always brings your favorite food (which you share! wow! this is definitely fate!), gives you the best, sometimes even unparalleled, clothes or things of the best quality — and never neglects you, as if your very presence activates in him all this incomprehensible desire to protect and adore you.

Does he spoil you too much?... Yes — but you forget one fact: he is also the proud father of one little sweet celestial whom he wrote especially for himself and now can shamelessly love them! Period!

Perhaps the only thing SHANG QINGHUA violently opposes is your fights with anyone, even if you are a head disciple and a member of a sect that, in addition to the economy, is often forced to deal with the dirtier and borderline gray or obviously black things common in the world of cultivators, — but SHANG QINGHUA knows that the sect will be destroyed much earlier what will you become the head... so what's stopping the two of you from just living your life together? Somewhere in a house near the city or in a small but rich city, where you can spend your life in a carefree and moderate pace until old age next to him, needing nothing and never shedding tears... a small pond for you or a garden where you can grow whatever you want, or a place where you will raise small or not-so-small animals...

SHANG QINGHUA is not the most active or aggressive person, he does not seek to expand influence at all, as the original owner of the body did, but when he gently combs your hair, looking at your straight back, he understands that this is impossible if he wants you to survive. Yes, he described that you 'didn't die' and even put forward several ideas about what happened to you after, but now, looking at you, none of them suits him. Why should you suffer? Isn't what was in the original novel enough for you? Don't you deserve to live in comfort and safety?

He is your father — not in the biological sense, but in a much more important way, in both of his lives, and it is natural that your future falls on his shoulders, since he has made the past for you and takes care of you in the present. He would prefer a calm, trouble-free life with the flow, but when SHANG QINGHUA looks at you rejoicing at his gifts as if for the first time or trying to take part of his responsibilities and difficulties to help, how can he think only of himself?

Maybe that's why he's here — to make you happy and make sure you'll never be sad again. After all, SHANG QINGHUA gave you his soul, so it's natural that he could even overcome reality itself and time to be there — and if you think about it like that, then everything falls into place!

His ability to take you as his disciple and almost-child, his need to pamper you, his adoration...

“Shifu?...”

He loves you so much that his heart bursting.

“Shifu, why are you lying down again???”

Papa will protect you.

Shen Yuan really tries not to get angry, but when he sees SHANG QINGHUA shamelessly purring and spoiling you, clearly mocking him about the fact that you love him as your 'dad' shifu, the desire to hit becomes much stronger.

It's not fair, okay? After all, you were originally supposed to be his disciple; that's why he called you, wanting to see his beloved spousefu character — only to find out that you are not his disciple. Perhaps it was then that he realized that something was wrong — just as SHANG QINGHUA understood it, who later heard at a secret meeting that Shen Qingqiu, who woke up after a fever, asked about you for some reason, thinking that you were his disciple, and was amazed when he was confirmed several times that no, this is not so, you are a disciple of another peak.

A disciple of another peak? No, it's– no, it's possible, but unlikely. Since Luo Binghe is already studying at the peak, then at about this age he should already have had a connection with you, right? It's strange if the semblance of 'white moonlight' for the protagonist still did not exist at the peak, although your first meetings probably should have already happened. Isn't that about when that meeting should take place where you save him from mockery by appearing in time as a 'famous young phoenix under the guidance of Shen Qingqiu' and saying your cool speech?

Isn't that when you first demonstrate yourself as a domineering and self-aware beauty, but also able to be modest? Where your 'presence alone is enough for everyone to immediately disperse, let alone look or words'? Where were you still an unblemished white lotus that made Luo Binghe take an example from you, whose gait was 'as silent and graceful as leaves dancing in tandem with a wandering wind in a silent bamboo forest' and 'voice similar at the same time to the purring of a well-fed tiger inspecting their mountain in search of the next prey to playfully tear it apart' and 'like the first gentle snow showering everything around like a blanket, covering and forcing all living things to be silent and heed the serenity and greatness'?

These were some of his favorite scenes, excerpts from which he regularly reread and kept screenshots in the "favorite" in the phone gallery!

Where?!

"Someone remembers," SHANG QINGHUA thinks, rubbing his nose after sneezing — and smiles affectionately when you carefully throw a cape over him before returning to his business next to him, deliberately ignoring shifu's loving gaze. You really are a hardworking little thing, aren't you? Of course, what his child should be like; although not at all like your daddy, but you still take great care of him, even if you don't give him some expensive gifts and don't try to physically serve, unlike him. But he likes it — to take care of you, pamper you, try to accustom you to his culture and jokes, teach you some things that later become 'internal' and are not familiar to anyone else.

... Almost no one else is familiar with them.

“You yourself know they were supposed to be my disciple.”

“... The author has the right to make changes to the work.”

Shen Jiu– No, Cucumber Bro looks up at him because of the slight difference in height, and there is such obvious discontent and irritation in his eyes that SHANG QINGHUA is sure: if it were real, acid would dissolve him right now so that the earth would open up and swallow what would remain of his body.

“Don't you think that such an intervention will have consequences?”

What are the consequences? That you can't pamper them now and take advantage of their care like I do?

“Are you jealous that they call me 'baba' and not you?”

Shen Yuan still hits him with a fan from the heart, but does not answer anything — and SHANG QINGHUA does not dare to continue teasing or pressing button, even seeing how annoyed he is, not wanting to admit that yes, damn it, he is angry that his favorite character, the thought of which caused and causes euphoria, got not him, but SHANG QINGHUA.

“Stfu.”

You don't really call him ''baba' — but if you did, his heart would immediately stop and there would be a serious deviation of qi.

... Hmm...

He definitely found something with which he will pester you now — and the way Shen Qingqiu looks with jealous irritation, clutching a fan in his hand, only adds to the situation of fire.

Even if you don't have the slightest understanding of what's going on.

[samueldays]

I intend for this to be my last britbong post for a while, so I don't become a one-note blog. I will get out my rant here and be done.

The posts, allegedly:

Prosecutor George Shelley said Dunn had posted three separate images. The first one showed a group of men, Asian in appearance, at Egremont crab fair 2025, with the caption: “Coming to a town near you.” The second also showed a group of men, Asian in appearance leaving a boat on to Whitehaven beach. This, said Mr Shelley, had the caption: “When it’s on your turf, then what?” A final image showed a group of men, again Asian in appearance, wielding knives in front of the Palace of Westminster. There was also a crying white child in a Union flag T-shirt. This was also captioned, said Mr Shelley, with the wording: “Coming to a town near you.”

I didn't find any source that provided the images themselves, so in light of the way British papers use "Asian" as a euphemism, I think it's likely this man was memeing about the PAKISTANI RAPE GANGS in Rotherham, Telford, and elsewhere who had RAPED THOUSANDS OF BRITISH GIRLS. The British prosecutors ought to spend more time on rape gangs, and an approximately negative amount of time on the men who are offended by the rape gangs and posting images about it. Give him a commendation for Raising Awareness.

Sentencing Thompson, Judge Temperley had said of the zero tolerance approach being taken by courts:  “This offence, I’m afraid, has to be viewed in the context of the current civil unrest up and down this country. And I’ve no doubt at all that your post is connected to that wider picture.

how about "context" and "wider picture" of rape gangs, shithead

“That has to be reflected in the sentence as does there need to be a deterrent element in the sentence that I impose, because this sort of behaviour has to stop. “It encourages others to behave in a similar way and ultimately it leads to the sorts of problems on the streets  that we’ve been seeing in so many places up and down this country. This offence is serious enough for custody.”

I think the rioters should impose a deterrent element on judges, because this sort of sentencing behavior has to stop.

Years ago I visited Britain and thought the poverty and dysfunction and low quality of things from restaurant tables and rental cars to internet connection and interior plumbing felt second-world compared to Norway. Britain had surprisingly rotted to become worse than Poland on several material counts. Now this is a nasty sociological mark against Britain, too.

Another bit of "context" I'll offer is that the British 2005, 2010, 2015, 2017 and 2019 elections were all won by parties (Conservative or Labour) who promised reduced immigration, and the Brits got increased immigration anyway. Massively increased.

If you take all the "democracy" and "representative government" and "will of The People" shit seriously, then The People of Britain are entitled to reduced immigration - it is their right for there to be fewer "Asians" in the country, as was promised to them, as they voted for. Having tried to get this at the ballot box five elections in a row, democratic governance has failed. The government has been denying the people their right. Judges should be issuing deportation orders for immigrants, not jailing nativists. I stress here that I am not a democrat myself, I do not believe in democracy, I am pointing out an implication of democratic legitimacy theory that rioters are the rightful democratic-revolutionary element of the people which is entitled to remove the government by force and install a more compliant one to restore the rights of the people and deport a million immigrants.

(They'll lose and not get that, I expect. Democratic legitimacy is gradually being superseded by Antihitlerian legitimacy, and peasant revolts need a powerful backer to have a chance, whether a defecting internal noble or external foreign supporter. Maybe Elon Musk would like a country. King Musk I of Britain...)

[theonethatyaks93]

HAPPY 30TH ANNIVERSARY TO THE LEGENDARY SONG KNOWN AS YAKKO'S WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!

Do I need to say anything more about this song? There's a reason why Yakko's World is considered a meme in our current day and age. 30 years ago today, this legendary song made its debut, and changed the way Animaniacs songs were viewed. This song is a staple of 90's pop culture, and has stood the test of time, despite the actual info in the song being outdated. This made Yakko Warner a superstar, and is still, to this day, the most viewed page on the Animaniacs Wiki. There's a reason why Yakko's voice actor Rob Paulsen takes every opportunity to sing it. It's bouncy, colorful, and REALLY catchy. I've found myself humming this song more than a few times. Also, I've memorized this song and I'm sure many others have too (it took me two weeks to memorize it only through audio with a rarely-used cheat sheet). Who hasn't heard this song before? I'm encouraging everyone, even if you've heard is dozes of times, to give this song a listen today for its 30th anniversary.

Also...

HAPPY 30TH ANNIVERSARY TO THE VERY FIRST PINKY AND THE BRAIN SEGMENT "WIN BIG"!

30 years ago today, episode two of the original Animaniacs debuted. With it came the most iconic song in the show, the classic segment "Cookies for Einstein", and the very first segment to not feature the Warners: Pinky and The Brain. Though they appeared in the previous episode and even had their first speaking lines, "Win Big" was the segment that gave the mice most of their iconic traits. A few things shown here include their theme song, Pinky's catchphrases, the AYPWIP gag, Brain's man-suit, the failure of Brain's world domination plans, the ending version of the theme song, and even some minor brinky hints. Seriously, they were doing this way back then. There were a few things that were still in their infancy. Brain and Pinky's voices weren't at their recognizable state. Brain's voice was just a straight-up Orson Welles impression. Pinky's was incredibly over-exaggerated, compared to later when it was softened. Their personalities and movement were also different. Brain was very deadpan and rarely showed emotion, something that would change quite drastically. Pinky was very silly, lacking the emotional intelligence he'd later have. Both mice also moved with extremely cartoony motions, acting like traditional Animaniacs characters. Later, they'd move more realistically to place themselves away from the Animaniacs tone. Despite this episode being overshadowed, it should still be remembered for giving us our favorite mice and all their traditional bits. Happy anniversary to Pinky and The Brain!!