#I remember XD feeling a lot more involved when I played it

[roseflowerthorns]

So someone messaged me on WhatsApp to keep on here, because even though I suffer with depression apparently I'm allowed to vent my feelings on my own blog, because I'm human xD

So I guess I'm going to stop trying to vanish for months at a time and just get on with things.

I'm a different person week to week I'm afraid it's just situational, and some days I'm just rock bottom and want to ghost the world entirely, I know I've moaned a lot the past few weeks when going into hospital I think I just mentally really crashed to rock bottom with it recently, but instead of deciding I'm going to vanish off my social media, I'm just going to close this app and make a cup of tea instead, even if I vanish for a few days now and again.

So here is some positive things this week -

✌️ I brought my toddler to the library yesterday and we both got our own library cards, he was chuffed to bits to pick out the design and write his name and has insisted on carrying it around with him none stop haha :3

We got him out about six books out and we have managed to read four already also the guy there was amazing with him and got him super involved in a little activity book they do there he was so excited, plus we played the massive connect four game haha 😅

I got myself three out and I started reading before bed last night and all of a sudden remembered I actually flaming love to read and so every few weeks we are going to get a bunch out and it will be our little thing, feels good to get back into reading again, I'm a book worm at heart tbh, also I used a bookmark yesterday my friend gifted me a while ago and it's so pretty and made me smile haha :3

✌️ Even though I'm out of hospital and it's now been three weeks. I'm still in a major flare right now, I've been struggling to stay positive with the pain and stiffness I'm enduring everyday, because of my stupid sps, but I've decided I'm actually hopeful for January because I get to see a brand new neuro at the start of the month, I looked him up and he looks like a really friendly person, so fingers crossed :)

✌️ Before bed last night I was like actually maybe I am better on my own, and decided to think of all the reasons why I'm probably better on my own without a partner. Then proceeded to dream of a zombie apocalypse of all things haha, and in it I had a boyfriend and we were battling through it together, but we were madly in love and super passionately into eachother, and then I woke up like, oh yeah I actually deserve real love and happiness, despite me being a chaotic mess at times. Someone someday will see me beyond my own perceived flaws at times and love me regardless so yeah :D

✌️Yesterday I got two compliments - Someone yesterday whilst I was out and about - I gave some money and some food to two homeless people and an older woman had seen me twice do this without me realising through town, and called me a ray of sunshine in a dim world and well that's possibly one of the nicest compliments I've ever had off a stranger in person.

Then in a crowded shop I was getting worse and going completely rigid the more walking I was doing, because venturing out during a flare wasn't the best but I had an appointment so didn't have a choice really, and I was on the verge of crying because I was in so much pain, but wanted to get Ethan some jumpers so ventured in, but I could barely stand at the checkout, and was clinging onto my walker with lots of bags, and an older woman asked if I was alright, then she said that despite being in pain she can tell what a wonderful mother I am because I was making him laugh and how I talk to him, despite struggling to get up from grabbing something off the floor haha.

Then she complimented my son saying how wonderful he is as he was helping me :3

So yeah sometimes complimenting a stranger can really make their day because I really needed to hear something positive yesterday because internally I'm really struggling to keep positive at the moment.

✌️ I'm getting more in the Christmas mood finally which I didn't think would happen this year, but you just can't not when you have a toddler haha ^^ I'm excited for him to see what santa brings him and we are going to do some little christmas crafts as we got a Christmas crafting book yesterday for toddlers! :3 I also budgeted yesterday and made a list of ideas to get Ethan and so I feel more prepared haha :3

✌️ My treats to myself this year for Christmas - I'm going to buy some lacto free tablets and treat myself to a lindt selection box off their website (pistachio, popcorn lindt and others I've never tried, it's my fave chocolate) eugh and a heated blanket if I can afford haha :3

So yeah,

I'm slowly trying to pull myself back together I'm sure going into next year I will be a lot more positive haha 😅🎄

[doedipus]

I never realized that colosseum was like, really short. I think the stream playthrough is over halfway done already and it feels like I haven't accomplished all that much yet

[aashiqeddiediaz]

gradient text tutorial

This tutorial is for @ladynephthyss​​ but y’all can have it too xD

We’ll be adding text so the final gif looks like this:

This tutorial assumes basic knowledge of gif-making, Photoshop, and coloring. I’ve only described the text tutorial in this.

Tutorial under the cut:

Couple things to note beforehand:

There is a lot of trial and error involved when doing any sort of text, and this is no exception! You might have to play around with the colors and the settings before you find something that looks good and readable!

This tutorial is inspired by the difference text effect in these tutorials: one and two by @anya-chalotra​ (highly recommend checking those out!), just done a different way.

This text effect works better on big gifs (540px width) that have quite a bit of movement below the text so you get that effect.

Find fonts that have bold shapes or some width to them, so you can see the movement.

This is my starting gif, after sharpening and coloring.

First, I position my text where I want it. (this can be moved around later, I just like to get an idea). Remember what I said about fonts? Try to use ones that are thick for this effect so you can see the gradient/movement underneath the letters. I’m using Intro. 

It doesn’t matter what color the text is at this stage, I just do white text so I can see it:

Then, add a gradient map in the color you want your text to be. For this one, I chose black and purple. The more contrast there is in your colors, the better it looks. You’ll be able to change this later though, if you don’t like the way it looks. 

This is how it looks with the gradient map:

Now, we’re going to go over into our layers panel, and where we have the white box (the layer box), we’re going to select and delete that...

...so it looks like this:

Then, while pressing Ctrl, we’re going to hover our mouse over the T in our text layer. Your cursor should show a white box with a dotted border. Press the T in the text with the specialized cursor, and you should get a dotted line all around the letters, like so: 

(I’m not able to get a screenshot of the cursor for some reason but I hope the instruction made it clear!)

Then, make sure you have your gradient map layer selected, and press the layer mask button (shown by a white arrow in the below image - it looks like a white rectangle with a black circle in the middle.)

This is what it should look like:

Right now, it’ll look like some solid color (which depends on your gradient). This is because we still have the text layer visible. Once we press the eye icon next to the actual text layer to hide it, you can see that this is what it looks like:

(You can also delete the text layer, but I don’t, just because if I decide to put these two words on two lines, or change their spacing or whatever, I don’t want to have to make a new layer. I can just edit that one before re-masking.)

As you play your gif, you’ll see that this is what the whole movement looks like:

You can see that the movement of him lifting the glass to drink his tea shows through the text, too. Almost like a weird color X-ray type thing, where the lighter color shows on darker shades of the gif, and the darker color shows on the lighter part of the gif.

Note: sometimes, depending on the way your gradient is made, you might get text that looks like the picture below. Just hit the reverse button (shown with a white arrow), and you should get the text looking like it does above.

This is the basic way to do it. Now, we can easily edit this, if we feel like there’s too much purple and not enough black. To do that, we go into the gradient, and change the slider positions of the colors. This is purely an aesthetic preference, but I’ll show you how to do it below:

For example, I moved those sliders so there’s more black and less purple, and the gradient feels more like two colors only, instead of all the various hues of dark purple/gray-purple. 

This is what the gif looks like:

In the gif before this one, the black was more of a muted gray. In the one directly above, you can see that it looks much more striking. So play around with that until you find something you like. 

It still doesn’t look very visible to me, so I’m going to add a drop shadow underneath (again, this is a preference thing). You’d do it just like you would with a regular text layer. Right click the Gradient Map layer and select Blending Options. Add a drop shadow.

This is what mine looks like:

And that’s it! You can keep playing around with the whole thing until you’re happy with it. You can even keep changing the color, and the great thing about that is you’ll be able to preview it as you change it to see what works with your scene. For example, I tried white and black text here:

And that’s it! Feel free to drop me an ask if anything’s confusing! Happy giffing!

[iz-star]

LaDS random thoughts.

I've seen players saying that they can't see Zayne as a romantic interest cause he resembles or reminds them of their dads or older brothers that are involved in the medical field... Funnily enough, these players always tend to be Rafayel girlies in most cases, and I find it funny cause in my case is kinda like this but opposite places? Rafayel sometimes reminds me to my dad!

Like not only personality wise but also, my dad used to be quite the artist when I was a child. He was a musician and also painted, I remember seeing him paiting a whole ass scene of a guy holding a dying woman in his arms in one of the walls of our rooms, kinda like a greek sculpture style. I think to see him paiting was that inspired me as a kid to learn to draw, altho I have to admit that I've been quite inconsistent about it, especially cause these were always just hobbies and not something that we decided to take professionally; my two brothers dedicated themselves more to music, while I went to the art route just to pass time.

Anyway, the thing is that I've always had this thought in mind and my mom ended up confirming it lol. My family knows I play L&DS cause I have no shame and they hear me yap about it all the time (They don't even know the name of the game or how... Spicy it gets, however), and my mom knows how much I love Zayne, so one day I showed her the three guys (it was before Sylus debut) and asked her to rate their looks from 1 - 10; I showed her Zayne and she said "I give him 100!" (cause she knew he's my favorite ❤️), then I showed her Xavier and she said "80, he kinda looks childish" (he was wearing his hoodie tho, so I suppose for her he looked too young), then I showed her Rafayel and she said without a second thought "200! He looks cool!"

And I was like... "Really? He's your favorite?" She just shrugged her shoulders and said "He's the one I like how he looks like the most"

And listen, is not like Rafayel resembles to my dad physically... Maybe there are some slight similarities, especially with the hair (and I think that's kinda important lol) but I left it like that. After some time, the devs released the lastest outfits of the three guys (The outfits used for 4 stars cards and that were recently released with Sylus debut, I don't remember their names rn, sorry lol) I showed my mom their outfits because I was drooling for Zayne and asked her which one she liked the most. She said Zayne looked nice, Xavier looked like a prince but of course, she liked Rafayel the most, and I was surprised again and asked her if she was being serious, like the previous time, she didn't comment on Xavier but dismissed Zayne cause he looked like a "Mister or Sir" I don't know if these terms fit with what she meant to say tho, cause words in our native language are different, but what she meant to say is that he looked "Too old for her taste" and the way my jaw dropped... I literally told her "You're older than me! You should probably notice him more than me!" We laughed a lot.

At the end I told her that it was curious and funny how she always chose Rafayel cause out of all the guys, he's the one with the role of the artist; my mom laughed. It was probably his vibe, idk but it's clear for me that my mom has a type and if she were to play the game, she'd definitely be a Rafayel girlie ahaha.

To finish this story, unfortunately my parents divorced years ago, you know things irl are more complicated than games and even tho my dad shares some similarities with Rafayel, they're not exactly the same, they have a lot of differences too so It's not complicated for me to see Raf as someone different and not feel weird when I get cute messages from him, however, I think after this is easy to sense how unserious my parents are, no wonder why Zayne's seriousness got me wrapped around his finger since I first interacted with him xD

[somer-writes]

Ayo random question cuz I’m so interested: what exactly do you head-cannon is Warrior’s past? (If you don’t then just ignore me :D)

so full warning here i have never played the hyrule warriors games bc they're not my thing (i have played fe warriors bc robin my beloved <3). i dont know any of the canon so this is pure headcanon fuckery:

-> warriors is highly based on midshipmen who were young officers in training aboard navel vessels usually from upper class families. except he's army so i call him a middleman instead bc i dont have a better alternative XD

-> he (like all/most of the links) is orphaned. he was old enough that he vaguely remembers his parents but young enough that he couldnt tell you anything about them.

-> from the orphanage, he was adopted by a noble family (which i havent come up with a name for yet). he has four adopted siblings who are all the biological children of this lord and lady

-> despite being adopted young it was always made clear that he was specifically adopted out of charity to make the family look good. warriors spent most of his childhood being paraded around as the poor orphan commoner who is learning how to be a proper gentleman and never as an actual son/brother

-> he is not close to any of his family and in fact resents his adopted father. his adopted mother never really had much to do with him and neither did his siblings so he just has a vague distaste for them. he does not speak to them of his own accord but the child in him still wants to please his adopted father so he is still involved with them

-> he grew up receiving an education and was held to much stricter standards than his siblings. he received very little praise for his efforts and was spared very little affection so he always worked himself to the bone for any scrap of it he could get. as a result hes extremely well read and quite good at math

-> at 14 he was sent into the army as a middleman. his father claimed it was because he was the only one of the children who would do well there. he excelled there if only bc he was finally somewhere he could receive the recognition he so desperately wanted/needed.

-> he did not have an easy time making friends bc he was a bit of a kiss ass and did not/does not know how to form and maintain valuable close relationships

-> warriors doesn't really know the difference between genuine affection and being praised for his usefulness. it's not difficult to take advantage of him by inflating his ego

-> he sets impossible standards for himself (some of which were forced upon him) and practices a lot of self-loathing when he feels as though he's failed

-> he refers to his adopted father as his "benefactor" but will call him father in passing

-> he doesn't write home

-> warriors saw his first battle at 16. he killed his first enemy at 17. he still has nightmares about both

-> we're getting a little fucky with ranks here but he *is* an officer. specifically a captain which is company grade. he likely commands small units on the battlefield but mostly up until the war of ages worked as a liaison. i think during the war he was given much more responsibility but his rank stayed the same bc chaos. he regrets every person who ever died under his command :(

(continued in part 2!)

[lunalillyhbhb]

About Me!

Hey! I've seen a lot of people doing this and I think it really helps to set the boundaries, so I thought I'd do it too!

I'm 26, female, and a 4th medical student. I'm Asian (and that's about as far as you'll get XD). Demisexual (on the asexual spectrum) and bi. I love to write and have written before (mostly slice of life), this is my first venture into what I'd consider more "erotic".

I am single but I am not looking for a relationship on this site whatsoever. I'm very comfortable in my single status.

My cardiophilia side has been around since I can remember, my earliest clear distinct memory being when I was around 7 years old. Essentially, cardiophilia is an integral part of my life, mixing itself in the simplest of moments which I think makes my experiences more colorful and beautiful.

About my pump, she's amazing. Strong and steady, she gives me life and pleasure. I sometimes feel like she has a mind of her own, distinct from me. She is very reactive, and a lot of times chatting with people really gets her going. The way I see it, everyone who talks to her has direct control over her, and she beats the way they want her to beat. Just know that if you ever RP with me/simply chat about my heart, you are to some degree directly controlling her XD

I love to chat and RP, but I do have some boundaries(like every other human being):

My DOs:

stress test

exercise tests

pressure

breath play

Cardiac examination

Ear stething/ stethoscope/palpating

carotid and IJV massage/maneuvers

heartbeat sharing/listening

tactile/auditory/visual stimulations

touching is fine anywhere along my torso and above

irregular/fast/slow, any rhythm is lovely

little-moderate drug use

fantasy elements like hand phasing through

commenting about my heart/her effects on you(this one is really big on me XD)

consensual

Actively engaging in RP. Don't take a backseat, no monosyllable/single sentence replies.

My DON'Ts:

resus

dark resus

knife play

stabbing/blood/gore

drug concoctions/abuse

electric shocking/offsetting my heart's pace with brute force

sexual insinuation, touching anywhere below my torso (I'm in the asexual spectrum, so it makes me uncomfortable)

kissing/romanticization (not looking for a relationship)

anything that harms the heart permanently

strangling the heart/major arteries/choking

chatting with me only when you're horny/treating me like a pleasure chat bot

pressuring me to reply (we live in different time zones and live different lives, please respect that. I reply when I can, I'm not ignoring you.)

live stream (I only operate in this platform and don't involve other platforms)

non-consensual/forcing when I express my displeasure

(All these is a NO when it comes to RP with me, it is a personal preference. While I sometimes enjoy reading about it/seeing others engage in it, it is NOT for me.)

There are a few more but for the most part, this covers almost everything! I know that with a few friends on here who I'm close with, I do RP some of the things I usually don't do; this only applies to people I'm close with, people who I trust and I know respect me. Please don't assume I'd be ok with anything! This list exists for a reason XD

While I do love RP, I also love chatting and making friends outside of RP. I love chatting about your life, how your day is going, general hobbies/ interesting events in your life, basically anything. I don't like just maintaining an RP chat, I'm not someone who exists solely to entertain you.

This turned out longer than I was expecting XD But that's it! Bottom line: Respect my preferences, I'll respect your preferences, and we all have fun!

[everythingwasnormalhere]

…don’t mind me :D

STYLE: 🌺🌷🌲🌳

BUNNY: 🌵🪴🌱🌻

SHIP OF YOUR CHOICE: 💮🍄

Please don’t feel pressured to answer these all, but have fun answering what you choose to!

Style:

🌺- Have they have any comforting or happy stories around their disabilities?

YES ACTUALLY<3 ok so, this is kinda spoilery but also really fucking cute so :3 when kyle got his feeding tube, it included a 1-2 weeks long hospital stay. He was super insecure about it, also worsening his already bad relationship with his scars, which made his mental state pretty fucking shitty... Stan stayed at his since he was let out because he's a codependent bastard, and at one point kyle broke down and told him about what was wrong, and our lovely staniel just. Told him he still found him beautiful and that he was glad Kyle was there and a bunch of super sweet stuff that made kyle feel so much better about himself<33 idk man they're so cute (also im writing the fic that includes this lmao)

🌷- How does being disabled imapct their love life? For example does it impact their date nights, activities they can and can't do as a couple, ect.

First, going to restaurants is a No. Unless they have been previously deemed Safe by Kyle, they will Not have dates there (because they can't know whether a restaurant's food will or not trigger an episode as they haven't made it themselves and all). Also Stan's whole depressive episodes make going out harder, because whenever it's a Bad episode he won't even leave the house so like... but they still manage :)

🌲- How do they accommodate eachother? Do they have a routine that helps with this? Do they do this consciously or subconsciously?

I WILL NEVER NOT TALK ABOUT STAN BEING THE FIRST PERSON WHO KNOWS KYLE'S SAFE FOODS !!! This is something he does almost subconsciously but he will not make anything Kyle has trouble eating, and even when they were younger he remembered to bring to school something Kyle could eat (orange juice usually) just in case his mom packed stuff he had trouble with. Kyle meanwhile knows all the signs Stan is falling back into an episode, and he's slowly learnt the ways to pull him out of it before it gets bad :)

🌳- What would happen if they were to break up and/or loose eachother for any reason? How would this impact any party involved, would this trigger their disability?

Stan is So codependent he'd probably not survive without Kyle. Ever. Like, he tries not to make it obvious because he doesn't wanna trap Kyle in an unhealthy relationship, but he's so bad at dealing with Kylelessness he literally couldn't survive by himself. Kyle too but Maybe not to that level because my boy has a permanent layer of mild dissociation that would maybe protect him from the breakup ;w; (but like, they're both codependent as fuck, they're not breaking up ever 😭)

Bunny:

🌵- If they were to have a date that incorporated their disability what would this be like?

When he's having a bad day, Kenny usually can't even leave his bed (and less home), so as stubborn he is he lets Butters pick their plans for the day because he's so much better at accomodating Kenny than Kenny himself 😭 Usually their dates those days will be cuddling in bed/the couch and watching a movie, playing videogames, reading comics... depends on what they wanna do tbh, but they both like those dates a lot :) Also, honestly all their dates incorporate Butters' sensory issues in some way, either him wearing his headphones when they go to loud places (arcade or the movies) or making the TV quieter and dimmer, they incorporate their disabilities in pretty much everything they do even though they never mention it XD <3

🪴- If they plan on having a family how does being disabled effect this and their decision? Alternatively do they plan on having pets, of so how does being disabled impact their collective decision?

First, SHADOW !!!! Well, she wasn't really in their plans originally... she was more like a "yup she's coming with us alright" kinda split decision, and Lemon and Kafka were just an extra XD But they would've gotten pets either way, Butters is the biggest animal lover and Kenny is close to that position too lmao<3 About having children, this was a harder thing because Kenny wanted to be a foster parent, but realistically they wouldnt be able to care for that many children :( in the end though, they adopted a girl and they aren't the best parents but they're pretty great<3 (this happens in their 30s tho XD)

🌱- If the ship were to get married how would their wedding accommodate their disabilities? Alternatively what would their house/appartment/whatever accommodate them?

"No Ken, we are Not getting a house with stairs" -Butters Stotch (he's learnt after their old appartment, Kenny+stairs aren't the best convo 😭) - Their wedding didn't have that many accomodations, quieter music and not that many people invited (Butters' parents had coming in Forbidden. btw.), not that much but they had a great time still :)

🌻- Do they ever have to deal with ableism in regards to their relationship? How do they deal with it?

Short answer: yes 😭

Sadly, they get ableism both ways ;-; Kenny is the one who's most visibly disabled out of them, so Butters gets a shit ton of "you are sooo inspirational for dealing with this, i could never" (insert confused Butters noises, he doesn't get tf they mean by that 😭) and "are you Sure you want to live with That your whole life?" (yes he does he loves kenny with his whole life fuck off 😔✨), and also obviously a bunch of assholes talking to Butters instead of Kenny whenever he's pushing his wheelchair (insert butters being nonverbal atm so Kenny's the one who gotta do the talking 💀). The opposite way too, mainly the times when Butters is having meltdowns - for example, once they were at a party and Butters got really overwhelmed, and instead of helping a lot of people told Kenny horrible things I'm not repeating, and even though Butters was mid-meltdown he still remembered all that stuff and Kenny had to reassure him so much as soon as they got home :(

Ship of my choice:

💮- If one of the characters in the ship are having a bad disability day how long does it take the other(s) to pick up on the fact that they're struggling? Are they good at picking up on the signs, if not, is there a point that they do notice without being told?

You're getting another bunny answer because they're my beautiful boys<33

Butters picks it up pretty soon, but whether he mentions it or not is another story. When they were in school, in case Kenny didn't skip Butters would not say anything until they got home or at least they were alone, instead sending Kenny disapproving looks every time he lied about why he looked so tired TwT then when Kenny started using aids, Butters (and pretty much anyone who knew him) could tell in what lvl of pain he was in depending on what he was using :3

Kenny has a bit more trouble telling, as a teen he usually had So Much stuff in his head so he couldn't catch the signs (as much as he cares, noticing your friend is having a bad day while you yourself are running on 5 energy drinks and 2 hours of sleep isn't the easiest task 😭), which meant Butters usually had to let him know in some way - tugging at his sleeve most times, as he struggles with speaking on bad days. If Butters didn't do that though, Kenny figured out by seeing how he looked much more anxious and was looking around all the time, and he'd make sure to keep him safe and stay with him till they could get home. As adults, Butters had the whole "being out of a dangerous environment means PTSD gets Bad" era, and it was a lot easier to tell as during bad days he didn't wanna leave their room at all, which most times caused Kenny to stay there too till Butters felt ready to go outside<3

🍄- Free question!: If one of the characters disabilities is a progressive disability how do they plan their future? Does this impact their relationship as a whole?

Aaaand another one for bunny cuz I'm not shutting up about them ever (srsly i need help 💀)

This wasn't something they discussed much, Butters was aware Kenny was getting progressively worse because he's good at noticing that stuff, but it wasn't until they got older (40s-50s) that they had a "it Is getting That Bad" moment. Kenny hadn't been dying for a Long while, so he had no idea what was wrong with him this time till he (finally) went to the doctors - basically, huge spoiler ahead lmao, his deaths had just been speeding up an already existing chronic pain condition, so he probably wouldn't have had the whole dying pains thing if he hadn't had that condition in the first place. This whole thing Fucked Him Up, he hid it from Butters for as long as he could, he would lock himself in his room for days on end, he didn't know how to deal with knowing there was no way to stop it besides permadeath :( as soon as Butters knew, he comforted Kenny, because his worth didn't depend on the stuff he could or couldnt do and his love wasn't affected by Kenny's disability at all (🙌!!), and they did their best to get used to the whole thing and manage it, together<3

[fitzrove]

(if you're still doing these!) 3, 8, 34 for the ask meme?

3. 3 films you could watch for the rest of your life and not get bored of?

Oaghh this is actually a tricky question!! But maybe I do know how to answer...

The Cat Returns (Studio Ghibli / Hiroyuki Morita)

It's my #1 comfort movie haha. I used to watch it with my sister when we were little, more so than any other Ghibli film (I did grow up with them and liked a lot of them - but I have to admit: I've never understood the appeal of Totoro specifically, I still think it's overrated hfhfjfj). Apparently it's widely considered to be a less good movie than the others, partly because Miyazaki wasn't that involved in it, but I think it's amazing. Also, I saw Whisper of the Heart (the one it's a spin off of) as an adult and didn't like it at all ajdjfkfk. The music, the worldbuilding/aesthetic, the (sometimes very eccentric) Finnish dub and the inherent whimsicalness of the story are very nostalgic and fun for me, and I've always loved cats, so :D

2. LOTR trilogy

It's cheating haha but putting all three under one heading. I've gone to a cinematic back-to-back marathon event of the extended edition... It took 12 hours and was one of the best moviegoing experiences of my life xD I feel like once you've done that, you're at a point where you can definitely say you're not going to get bored of it. I mean, I've been known to dip to get more snacks during some sequences (particular non-favourite is Shelob - not for any lack of fondness for spiders btw, I just find it a bit tedious as an action scene and it's at a point in the story where I'd rather be Moving On), but overall I really love these films - the story, the world, the characters, the music, the sheer amount of effort and care that went into making them and how it really shows >:]

3. POTO 2004

<333 Favourite musical film hahahahahah. I know this is controversial, but for me personally it's in some aspects even more fulfilling than seeing the show in the theatre. My favourite part/character of the show and book is and has always been the opera house!!!! I looooove theatres and theatre backstage stuff, especially big fancy old opera houses, and the movie is very immersively costumed and staged (set?). I don't watch it often (in full anyway - I rewatch the Carlotta scenes semi-often though), but I feel like if I was strapped to a chair and made to, I would just be vibing.

8. any reoccurring dreams?

I've only had one (1) actually repeated dream in my life, where it played out the same beat-for-beat as if watching the same VHS tape again, first when I was about 5 and again when I was maybe 7 years old - a weird Disney pastiche of Aladdin and The Little Mermaid haha. Repeating themes are more common. My least favourite of those was when my mental health was at its absolute lowest in my life during high school, and for around too months I kept dying in different kinds of highly specific ww2-related circumstances 😭😭 (I don't know if I started reading survivor stories too young - around the age of 10 or so...) ANYWAY yeah haha, not many specific reoccurring dreams. I wish I could repeat the one or two times in my life when I've dreamed about flying, it was a lot of fun >:]

34. any pet peeves?

Too many - I feel like half my tumblr posts are about these xD

One big one rn is that many German theatres don't let you book your tickets in just one step. They make you put in all your info and pick a seat and everything, and only then (after a 5-10 minute delay) do they send an email asking to transfer the money to secure your booking. Well, I was meant to go somewhere tomorrow, but turns out I never remembered to send the money in time and have lost my seat :----) It's okay haha it's going to thunder and rain tomorrow anyway, I'll just stay in my hometown and go see something here later lol...

[lyranova]

Hi, it’s clover anon. For the ask game can you answer 3, 6, 9, 16, 32, 43, 47, 50. If it is too much just answer 3.

Hiya Clover anon! This isn’t too much, no worries 🥰!!

3 Have you ever written a soulmate AU? If you haven't, why would/wouldn't you write one?

Nope, I’ve never written a Soulmate AU 😅! And tbh…I haven’t really wanted/actually thought about writing one because I know so many other writers and mutuals who’ve written them and in so many different ways…I think that’s the only way I would ever write one, was if I could come up with a different or unique way to write it 🤔. But right now…I’ve got nothing and no real inspiration to write a Soulmate AU 😅. But maybe someday!

6 Have you ever started to write a relationship and had it develop differently than you expected? How so?

Hmm…romantic relationships? Not really. Platonic ones? A bit 😆! I think, all the platonic friendships my friends OC’s and my OC’s have together developed a bit differently then I (or we) imagined; I mean, we all knew they would be friends, but I didn’t think they would all be so close, and I love it so much 🥹💕! I couldn’t imagine any of them and their relationships any other way!!

9 When you write, do you plan out the stages of a relationship, or just let it flow? Do you have any works where the characters seem to "write themselves"?

Hm, depends! Most times I have the relationship stages planned, but there are times and moments where I let the relationship flow and take its own course! I have a few works where the characters write themselves, and right now it’s my AU’s 😆!

16 Are there any relationship dynamics/tropes you enjoy reading about, but wouldn't want to write yourself? Vice versa?

Hmm…I think enemies to lovers is one of the few tropes I write about but don’t read 🤔. It’s not that I don’t like it, it’s just I haven’t found many that appeal to me 😅. As far as ones I enjoy reading about but wouldn’t write, hmm…I guess Isekai fics/stories? I’ve read quite a few, but have never really written one myself (nor have I really wanted to)

32 Do you find it more fun to write soft, domestic romances, or dramatic thrillers?

Honestly? Depends on the day and what mood I’m in. I love writing soft, domestic romances, but sometimes I love a dramatic thriller! Right now, most of my AU’s are a combination of both because I really like them (especially the Butler AU 😉)!

43 How do you feel about unhappy endings? Unrequited love? Major character death?

Oof…i love to hate and hate to love all of these 😆! I have done all three at one point or another (Unrequited love with my OC Phoebe and @thoughtfullyrainynightmare ‘s OC Leon, Unhappy ending/Major Character Death with Dandelion Wishes and Children of the Future). So I enjoy them, but not all the time XD!

47 What's the most self-indulgent relationship you've written? Are there any particular moments/scenes that you wrote just for you?

*points to YuNeva and Zerilliam* Those are the most self indulgent relationships I’ve written 😆! I know a lot of people don’t like them, and that’s okay, and frankly I don’t care because I do and sometimes…I want to be a little selfish and write something for me that I hope others also enjoy!

Honestly if you read any fic/story involving them you’ll find many moments and scenes that I wrote just for me 😆!

50 Free space! Brag on yourself! Advertise your writing! What are you most proud of recently?

Umm…again, I haven’t really been writing very much the last few days/weeks…but I guess I’ll share another snippet from my Butler AU 😅.

He remembered the time the song began to play, and she began to gently move and sway in front of him as they walked to the Black Bird Café together. He remembered how she reminded him of a branch that gently swayed in the wind, how the gentle breeze rushed over her and gently tousled her loose braid, and the gentle smell of lilacs and vanilla from her perfume filled his senses.

The smell of lilacs that has once nauseated him, now made him smile and caused his heart to flutter.

[egg-emperor]

honestly I just expect and accept that in a bunch of official media, even including the games with Frontiers to a small degree, will have the odd bits of OOC dialogue with Eggman. there are times where I still go "he would not fucking say that" because there's just no way he'd ever actually say and mean such a thing, would ever say it that certain way, would ever actually feel a certain way to say it in the first place, etc

but my priority now is what were they actually going for and does that part work for his character? sure dialogue is very important and adds a lot, I love writing it the most myself and making it feel exactly like what the character would say and how they'd express it. but it's just highly likely for people to get it wrong from time to time and I personally would say that they are really just occasional and small

overall I'm happy with what all the strongest parts of the writing points towards most and revealed intent by the writers, that's what matters to me. I'd like for all the dialogue and scenes to never miss but there will be times where the odd couple of lines shouldn't have been there or could've been rephrased, vocalized and written in a way that was much more in character for him if anything

but again, I'm happy understanding what they're actually going for and what all the strongest writing and main sources point towards the most. for example, I think game Eggman overall is fantastic as ever. I think there's just some flubs here and there as they explore already existing assets of his character in different ways but will settle into it properly over time and gain more solid footing for the better

as for things like takeovers, it's been OOC for characters since the beginning, they've forgotten facts about the games and/or accidentally replaced them as a result, they've even gotten the names of things in games wrong. it's just simple social media fun lol. but I still enjoy them overall because it's not the solid finalized fully stamped and approved published media like the games

the big writers aren't involved, it doesn't go through tons of checks and changes, they're written fast on a time limit often based on how funny they think it'll be. they made Shadow a Taylor Swift fan ffs XD of course a big majority of the fanbase will treat it like canon, most of those don't play or like the games much anyway. it's honestly out of sight out of mind now, really not interested in fandom shenanigans anymore

I couldn't care less about fandom's wild takes and overemphasis on any sides anymore. all I can say is people will find ways to twist and misinterpret literally anything and it's a losing game lol. my blog is just to gush about Eggman, analyze things, share my thoughts, discuss with those who ask in my inbox/replies and then I leave. it's all become much more enjoyable after stepping back from general fandom

and that's what this post is again now, just my two cents as usual. not directed towards any situation or people in particular, just an overall observation of recent fandom from afar as I've taken a step back and where I stand on it based on focusing on the official media alone and avoiding the opinions of random strangers at any chance I get. the way the world is supposed to be but the internet's existence changed lol

I'm really satisfied and at peace with official Eggman and this is how I handle any small occasional OOC moments. I still understand and like what they're going for based on what all the strongest writing and writer commentary points towards. I don't concern myself with what general fandom thinks and if they latch onto the small OOC parts, they don't have the power to influence anything beyond the social media acc

I also tell myself that sometimes writers on official media aren't as insane and obsessed about Eggman like me to the point I remember every line he's ever said and think very hard down to every last word and the inflections and ways it could be interpreted when writing him lol. so yeah chances are at that, they're gonna have him say some things where I feel it should've been different or removed at times

but again, as long as I'm happy with the official media with its strongest parts and especially the game canon media then it's all good with me!

[pageofheartdj]

Hi! Autistic aroace anon here!

Can I say I got all gushy when you said “I love your rants”? I’m not even sure if it was indeed for me but I was all

Also, YEAS!! Exactly!! I dislike, although I get it, how the fandom goes “they only fit in this box”, no! They’re amazing and we’re so involved with them bc they got layers!! I love rottmnt rather than any other tmnt franchise bc THEY. GOT. LAYERS!! (They’re onions, Shrek!)

It’s the first time you CAN’T define them by a word. “Oh Raph’s the violent one, leo’s the leader, Mikey’s the clown and Donnie’s the nerd”. NO! They finally went and showed who’s these characters truly are (also, kinda controversy opinion, but bayverse kinda did that as well, but not as good, they got layers there but still kinda.. not rlly) ((I love that movie but once again hate the sexual-romantic tension btw April and the turtles. Bc its always only that!!! For her to end up with Casey ANYWAY!!!))

•cough• SO! We finally get to see how Raph is still head on on stuff and kinda short fuse, but that’s bc he cares and worries and is overprotective. And with the other brothers as well, you have no idea how HAPPY I was when Donnie got in the fight and wasn’t a helpless nerd whose only trait is computers, like in the others. Yeah, he asks for help (his comedic “help! Help heeeelp!” In the giant bird episode is amazing), but it’s not only him, all of them do at some point.

They finally showed who they are and why they’re like this! So the fandom taking away this important trait of them always makes me go feral.

My memory suck but I think I remember what your asks were, so YA! =3 (Plus I think you are the only one who gives me this long asks?? I think???XD)

Like I get flanderization in fandoms, especially when there is no new material, and fans are playing so much with fanons, they kinda get lost in it too much, so they forget the canon and strip off the characters of some of their traits!

Like, 'I like this one trait/I want to explore this trait more', this is liked by many, it gets explored some more and in the end people forget that it wasn't the only trait and it wasn't even that prevalent in the first place. Like Donnie's touch aversion. Some wanted to explore it, cause autism and all that and that's fair. But after some point people forget that he is aversed like 10% of the time. Which is NOT a lot, not the way people write him 'he is in a good mood so he bares his brothers touching him for a few seconds' =/

I won't say other versions didn't explore turtles characters cause I don't remember much xD I just know the basic characterisations. And I LOVE Rises spin on them!! Raph is still hot headed and angry, but he also directs it into aggressive protection and it feels REALLY nice, not just 'I am angry cause I am' xD Like I am sure other versions are protective too, they suppose to care, but I dunno, I don't remeeember if it was explained as well as with Rise Raph x) I like Rise Leo even more cause he is much more different from other versions while still having his core characteristics, like he is smart and observant and strategic, that's so cool!!! But he was not burdened by being a leader so he is a goof, which is kind of similar to 2012 Leo xD Donnie is just. Superb in every way xD He can fight, he LIKES fighting, he LOVES creating his tech for fighting XD Mikey doesn't need to be The funny one, cause they all are <3 So he gets a bit of different role that still feels similar <3 (Can't say much about Bayvesre caaaause I just can't get behind not 2D xD That's why I just couldn't stick with 2012, barely finished S1 xD)

[goldenteaset]

(I know I've posted this official art before but I don't care, it fits the occasion)

It's my 1 year yume-versary with Belial today! I felt like being a hopeless romantic (especially after seeing this art again), so I wound up thinking about the process of how this happened. And while it's 99% coincidences that make me happy, when put together like this they do form a love story...

While I got into GBF because of him, the actual act of falling for him "as myself" (for lack of a better way to put it) was a lot longer. Four years, in fact! It was half "I just like him with Djeeta and Lyria better" and half "Nah, he wouldn't like *me*, I'd be too shy".

Cue 2022. XD;

By which I mean, I'm not sure when in summer it started, but all of a sudden he kept showing up in my dreams (as Oribe, his semi-canon school AU self). "Oh cool, that hasn't happened before", I thought, thinking nothing of it. It seemed a good reason to write him and Djeeta in a similar setting; I'd take it.

And then I started noticing that Djeeta wasn't involved. "Well, maybe she's there but I'm seeing things from her POV this time"... ^^;

Months before the Oribe dreams, I kept dreaming about Summer Belial months before we got the Summon, which is funny anyway, but those were still focused on Djeeta. My subconscious really wanted me to have fun with Oribe/Belial, and it was going to bludgeon me until I did. At the same time, two things happened:

A particularly powerful dream about Oribe!Belial where he really wanted to take a selfie with me and kept insisting "I want to see your face, don't hide~"

The "Belial advice column for GBFest" appeared

The former was A Lot, but the latter was easily compartmentalized: "Just write the letter as if you're part of GBF's world". It took a few tries, because I had to remember kafabe (i.e. these letters were being sent to "Belial", not the devs), but I did it!

I burbled about how he'd always gotten me out of writer's block, because of course, and made absolutely sure not to overthink my heart racing while imagining sending it in canon. It was in English, down to the pen name "Shy Writer", and knew it probably wouldn't get picked for the GBFest segment.

"Just the fantasy is enough," I thought, forgetting what "yume" meant.

Fast forward to Jan 2023!

GBFest is here, it's fun whether you're there in person or not...and I'm catching up on Day 1's stream after falling asleep. ^^; I found the "Belial answers fanmail" segment and was just enjoying the spectacle. Here's a video of it separate from the massive stream one:

Someone had sent in something about being shy/nervous about who they liked, very likely him. (Also they called him "Beli-chan", which is adorable.) Belial read it normally, but his response (at 4:13, yes I've kept track of it)...well...

He let out probably the deepest, sultriest chuckle we've heard from him yet, which is saying a lot, and then added "'Shy'? How cute (kawaii ne)~."

Again: it's all coincidence, of course. Just a lot of convenient circumstances that eventually lined up into a fantasy narrative that makes me happy.

But boy did it not matter in that moment, when I felt like a tsundere who'd been found out after a whole season of UST. XD

It felt like there wasn't any need to deny it anymore. Nor to make excuses that were never going to hold up, as long as I kept denying that sense of fun to my own detriment. Or, to be extra sappy about it--it was as if Belial had been seducing me throughout '22 to the beginning of '23 and had now finally gotten the point across to my very dense self-insert/OC.

I've been enjoying myself a lot since then--going out more, trying new hobbies, just being happier in general. Could that have happened without this as a push? Maybe. But it didn't happen until I "had food at home", so to speak, which feels telling.

I think we as a species need space in our heads for imagination and play, and that varies from person to person. Along with writing, mine just happens to be (day)dreaming about the Primarch of Cunning acting like a bird of paradise and/or seducing me and my self-insert OC into semi-reasonable sleep schedules.

So, yeah. Happy anniversary, Belial. May there be many more!

[twixtandshout]

I spent way too long getting distracted by the sparkles that follow my cursor on your blog XD XD XD ANYWAY, you had talked about DnD character sheets for the LU boys and I'm here to ask about them! :D I don't know much about DnD but you were excited and I'm interested so feel free to tell me all about it!

Yes!!! Hi! :D There's a lot on them but I'm proud of them all. I guess I'll just pull out a couple things I think are neat from each of them? (And I'll try to keep things understandable for you, dw!!)

Sky: I don't remember what I already went through in comments, but I know he's your favorite so I'll try to pull out something new and interesting for you. Hm... I've got him with 14 levels of Paladin (swords and a bit of holy magic, sworn to a higher power), 3 levels in Warlock (magic granted as part of a pact with an outside entity), and 3 in Barbarian (hit stuff better when you're angry). Pretty sure I already talked about the storm stuff he gets from the Barbarian side of things – he gets some storm/lightning stuff and it's great – but I've made him a Pact of the Talisman warlock with Sun: his sailcloth is a symbol of his bond with her, and apart from acting as a parachute, it also lets him add a little extra to the roll a few times each day through her power when he fails a check. He's got a bunch of stuff that makes him really good at dueling, plus a couple extra feats that make it easier for him and Sun to talk 💞

Four: Four has. so many classes. I gave him 10 levels in Artificer, for making magic tools; then each Color plus Shadow got 2 levels in another class: Wizard for Vio (learn magic through study), Druid for Red (learn magic through becoming in tune with nature), Barbarian for Blue, Paladin for Green, and Sorcerer for Shadow (obtain magic through genetic accident/tragic backstory/general lottery). Generally Druids' main ability as a class is Wildshape, which is to say animal shapeshifting, but that wasn't the vibe for Red, so he's a Wildfire Druid, which gives him a living fire friend instead. Also, one of the magic things you're allowed to say your character knows how to make when you're making an Artificer is a living robot – I've quietly had him learn that, with the expectation that that's how he got Shadow back. :3 Other than that, he's just got a bunch of elemental spells basically!

Time: Time's got a couple levels in Bard (magic through music) and Ranger, but he's primarily a Sorcerer, with a slightly modified Clockwork Soul subclass – technically the flavor there's meant to be more "the underlying order of the universe" than "messing with time," but I just traded out a couple spells on the list and it works fine for him. :3c His background and his Bard and Ranger subclasses all involve the fey, though. He gets some fun stuff with glamours and charm effects, and, just for flavor, when he casts time stands still and you can hear/see gears ticking around him.

Legend: Lej's got a ridiculous number of classes too, and he doesn't have Four's excuse. (There's not even enough room on the sheet to abbreviate them all like I did Four's, so I just filled in the "class" blank "Yes.") So he's got a bit of everything! Pulling out a few interesting bits: he gets a whole bunch of sneaky stuff as a Rogue, as well as sizable bonuses to spotting lies and hidden objects. As a College of Creation Bard, he gets little visual symbol effects that float around him when he plays, and he can create a medium-sized object out of nothing, like that cane that lets him make boxes for some reason. As opposed to the more heroic Paladins of the Chain, Lej's Paladin subclass is the Oath of Vengeance, which among other things lets him channel divine power through utter a "vow of enmity" against an enemy, making his attacks more likely to hit until it's dead. I also gave him a few feats to really round out the knowledgeable veteran thing – he's really good at dungeon delving.

Hyrule: I gave Hyrule the Circle of Dreams Druid subclass, which is fey-themed and gives him a lot of healing abilities in addition to a little bit of teleporting. (He's got levels in Rogue and Sorcerer too, but apart from "he dodges real good, gets bonus damage for surprise attacks, and can modify spell effects," I don't have much to say on those for him.) Reflecting that he carries the Triforce, I borrowed the Radiant Consumption character feature from the Aasimar – as a bonus action, he can start burning, glowing brightly for 10' and doing radiant damage to everyone (including himself) every turn for a full minute. (A combat round in DnD lasts approx 6 in-game seconds!)

Wind: Wind! 2 levels in Rogue, 18 in Sorcerer. As a Halfling, he can reroll any 1 once. He can fly after casting spells (or grant flight to others), is immune to thunder and lightning damage, and he gets a feature to control storms! He can stop rain in a sphere, control the direction of wind, and hit things with lightning. He's also got Truesight and can make ghosts visible for an hour once per week, and I gave him the Quickfingered and Silvertongued feats, so he's great at pickpocketing and sweettalking people.

Twilight: Twi's largely a Ranger, with Exactly enough levels in Druid to give him Wildshape, because Wolfie. He's a Circle of the Shepherd Druid, which seemed fitting; he gets feyspeak as a language, can talk to animals, and can summon a hawk spirit to fight for him. As for the Ranger stuff, he's a Horizon Walker Ranger – the subclass description says they "guard the world against threats that originate from other planes or that seek to ravage the mortal world with otherworldly magic." He doesn't have a lot of spells – I don't think he'd use most of the ones I gave him, honestly, but the class says he gets some so I made the most of it – but he's really good at navigating, especially in forests, and he gets bonuses to track enemies. He's Also very good at vanishing in plain sight, seeing in darkness, and teleporting up to 10' before each attack.

Warriors: Seven levels of Fighter! Seven levels of Paladin! Six levels of Cleric! This boy is So Good at whacking things with swords, and he also channels magic/holy power as a representative of the god of War. As a Battlemaster Fighter, he's got a lot of tactical maneuvers he can use to set people up around the field or grant bonuses, and although his Paladin oath is baaasically the same mechanically as Sky's, he's an Oath of Glory Paladin where Sky's Oath of Heroism. He has a Peerless Athlete feature, he can Channel Divinity to vaporize low-level undead, and he's very mobile – he isn't slowed by difficult terrain, and he literally cannot be physically restrained.

Wild: He'd have a different level distribution if I kept what he had pre-nap, but I decided he keeps five levels in Fighter and then the rest is Ranger from post-nap. He's a Fey Wanderer Ranger (like Time!) so he gets some glamour abilities, and if something makes him save against charm/fear effects, he can redirect it and make that thing make the save against Him instead. He's great at navigating and disappearing in the wilderness, and he gets a couple teleporty things. He's also got a bunch of skills in cooking and making/finding healing food, and he regains more than the usual hp when he recovers, too.

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

OC Tag Game

got tagged again by @shivunin! <3 You're right that this is a curse to do fsdkljfls, i am indecisive af so prepare for rambling

Favorite OC: Wow starting with a mean one :( It rotates and switches between all of them, but Liam and June probably occupy the spot the most often

Newest OC: Uhh i guess Robin? They are In My Brain but i have yet to do a playthrough with them lol

Oldest OC: In general? Des xD (she was a warrior cats oc i made when i was 11 but she's still very dear to me <3). For DA, it's Neira! I played he games in order & she was my first Warden :)

Meanest OC: June for sure lol. Both in that she is very blunt and does not belive in lying for the sake of being nice, and in that she is the most likely to be actively mean on purpose. 2nd Place goes to Noya because she can also be really nasty when she wants to be.

Softest OC: Oof hard pick :') I have come to terms with the fact that i am unable to make OCs who are not softies in some way or another, and they definitely all are. But.. i wanna say Kala? Because she has a big nature vs nurture contrast, and once she has the chance to she is actually very soft, and very deliberately. In that she craves a lot of closeness with loved ones, but also in that she sees the beauty in the small things, and in being determined to spite cruelty through small kindnesses.

Most Aloof/Standoffish OC: Also Kala xD She is. Not sociable at all fsdfjk and is also not overly involved; yes she cares, but she also knows how to distance herself.

Dumbest (affectionate) OC: I wouldn't call any of them *dumb*, but at the same time, all of them are at least A Little Bit dumb <3 Liam is the most likely to have brainlag or head empty moments, June is the one who will do dumb things despite knowing better and/or not think things through, Lilian will have internal "yeah i got this :)" (she has not got this) moments the most, and so on.

Smartest OC: Tie between Ari and June! At least for the traditional definition of smart lol. Ari is very booksmart, is very good at remembering things, processing concrete information, thinking ahead and making elaborate plans. His thoughts are always 5 steps ahead and sometimes it feels like he is thinking for three people at once. As long as he has precise information to work with, he's gonna make it work.

June is the opposite, she is really bad at encyclopedia type knowledge or planning but is super good at conceptualising abstract ideas, at making connections and bending thoughts this way and that, at combining ideas and theorising. She has a good intuition for how conceptual ideas might work in practice, and a creative approach to problem solving.

Bonus shoutout to Var'renan for being the most people-smart. They're very perceptive and very good at reading people and social cues.

OC I'd Probably Be Friends With: Well, i would say i'd probably vibe with Renan or Kala or Ari, but irl i seem attract all the extroverts, so chances are i'd end up being friends with Noya or June or Adriel lmao. Ig Adriel would be the best bet though. Cos she's energetic but not overly so, she'd still be totally down to just hang out and chill; we're both chatty but awkward talkera sometimes and would probably hype each other up really well when we get exited

edit: bruh why did tumblr delete part of the post (part of the last bullet point & the tags got cut off)???? I Do Not have the energy to put in all the tags again, so if you read this, you can consider yourself tagged! If you do it please do tag me, i'd love to read more about all your OCs :3

2nd edit because. It cut off the last category again smh (not the text after this time tho??) and idk why but i am also Not gonna rewrite that again e-e

[purpleglitch]

I've been insane about roleswap ever since taxolotl made fanart about it. Whenever someone mentions it my brain explodes. So many things could change, because, in the lore, Dream's reputation as this scary unbeatable guy iinfluences how things play out. Not only because of him being the creator of the server but because of manhunt, so maybe george would have to "prove" that he's strong and SHOULD be feared. The ways he could do this are alarming, considering how smart he is and how little he cares about consecuences. Also, george and dream approach roleplay pretty diferently, so I think A LOT of relationships and events can change. How would have exile been if george was the one in charge? would rs!rivals be mortal enemies because of techno being an anarchist and dream a king?

Idk there's just so much, but anyway DNF ANGST.

OH ANON YOU'RE SO SMART I LITERALLY GASPED WHEN I FINISHED READING

YOU'RE SO RIGHT so many things could've gone differently because of how their roles changed and i didnt think about this when writing that brainrot post, love the idea of rs!george proving that people should fear him, and without the "dream will protect me" dynamic from c!dnf it's so interesting to think about what would happen, rs!gnf has the power to make c!gnf's "destroying the smp" dream come true and i feel like because his "apathy" or how he hids his emotions/attachments, he could fit the monster title that people gave c!dream, like emotionless, apathetic, how he doesn't care about the consequences, idk how to explain it but im shaking with excitement. also this got long again but here are more thoughts xD

For those events, i'd say first that exile could've happened from a different cause, i think tommy could've been one of the people that knew about george's actual feelings towards dream and viceversa so maybe he could've used dream as leverage against george (maybe for the discs?) or straight up harmed him which made george very angry and instead of putting obsidian walls around new l'manberg like c!dream, he could just threaten to blow it all up again unless tubbo exiled tommy, what if instead of the "spirit speech" is george laughing at tommy thinking dream is important to him and pretending he's only threatening destruction because he harmed the king of the smp which was against their "allyship" with l'manberg. During the actual exile, i think george could've been more mischievous and pranking tommy destroying his stuff and laughing at him for his situation, while also throwing comments that it was tommy's own fault for what happened, and whenever tommy tried to rebel against him i imagine george would be like "aww tommy don't do that... you don't want me to blow up your city with all your friends in there, do you? remember that poor tubbo only has one life left!" all with a fake sad voice(??)

As for rs!rivals..... oof, that's a bit more complicated like you said their political stances are very different, and i remember that clip of c!techno killing c!george on the throne room and.... yeah.... but maybe since they know each other from other servers they could have talked privately about dream's role as the king and how it was george's idea for him so he could relax and not be as involved in the story as before, techno would also be one of the people that know about rs!dnf feelings about each other since dream brings george up in almost every conversation they have, also i feel like techno would throw jokes like "dream you're copying my fashion style look at you, cringe, wear something else" and maybe it's my rivals bias but i want them to be at least in friendly terms 😭 george and techno would be not as close as rs!rivals but they teamed up for doomsday and i think techno would find amusing george's crazyisms and when the prison arc happens and dream finds out i think he would plead to techno to help george somehow, he tells him he's no longer king, hasn't been for months but he's worried about his boyf- george and either (1) knows about the favors between them and he tells techno he's using george's favor to help him or (2) maybe before the smp rs!rivals already had some favors going on so dream uses his so techno helps george. and techno reluctantly does, he clearly doesnt want to make his friend happy, shut up chat.

but i'm also interested in your thoughts of rs!rivals being mortal enemies!!! 👀👀👀 sorry this got too long LMAO didnt proofread this so sorry for any errors

[ladytauria]

2, 3, 5, 6 (and will you read it in the upcoming year), 10 ,14, 18, 20, 24 y 25!

thank you for asking!!! i had to grab books from last year bc this year was a bad reading year for me, but the questions were/are fun!

2. Did you reread anything? What?

i reread the last unicorn yesterday!!! bc i was feeling nostalgic. i made. a BUNCH more highlights in my kindle. (altho i read my physical copy lol.) there's just... so much good stuff in there, aah.

(oh ik u sent me an ask about this, idk if you saw it--ik tumblr is goofy--but its here! also, minor clarification: it doesn't have a *sequel* but there's a pair of novellas, released as one book, that are set in the same world!)

3. What were your top five books of the year?

i. didn't read very much this year at all. (er, published books! i did read a ton of fanfic). the beginning of this year was exTREMELY stressful, and in the latter half, all the books i started just. failed to grab me :/

that said!! i met my reading goal last year, so i will just include those!!

One of the books I did read this year was The Cybernetic Tea Shop by Meredith Katz, a v cute novella about a mechanic & an android. It's set a few centuries in the future, where robotics have advanced significantly. Intelligent AI were banned a long time ago, but those few whose bodies have not eroded / code hasn't corrupted are allowed to remain. The android in the fic runs a Tea Shop, which she inherited from her long-deceased lover <3 (The book is also sappic! I would love to read more of Katz's work.

Also, like I said, I reread The Last Unicorn, which I think would be on a top 5 in general for me, if I were ever to attempt to narrow that down xD. The prose in this book is beautiful; there are so many lovely lines. And the themes in the book--the play of mortality vs immortality, the structure of fairy tales & how the ppl in this setting are v much bound by them--are present from the very beginning, which was a fun thing to pick up on during my reread xD

All Systems Red by Martha Wells! I read a lot of sci-fi last year for some reason? Anyway, I adored this. Murderbot is a fascinating pov character & I love the choices Wells makes with it. My only gripe is that I could not immediately go out and buy the rest of the series.

Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger!!! this was. so cute. It's YA, I think? Yes, okay, Storygraph confirms this. The writing is lovely, and I adore the main character and the story! One thing you see a lot of--or, actually, I guess I should say I see a lot of--in YA is like. The rebellion against authority figures? Parents are often antagonists, and I understand why this is, but it was very refreshing that in this book Elatsoe's parental/adult figures were so present & involved & like. There was this mutual respect between them that I adored. Also, she can talk to ghosts? And solves her cousin's murder by doing so! And she has a ghost dog. What's not to love?? (Oh, and she's ace, which I think I remember her mentioning explicitly! Also, the way Native culture is threaded through the book is just. Lovely.)

Am. Am I already at 5. How did. How did I get to 5 already 🥺 *kicks foot* Okay. I. Would not be me. If I didn't mention Nona the Ninth. The only reason I didn't rec the Locked Tomb series to you is bc you mentioned not wanting sci-fi, and while there are a lot of fantasy elements, it is. Very sci-fi. Anyway. I admit that I was not enthused about going into this book. Nona was originally going to be a novella, released between Harrow & Alecto, and when I heard it was getting full novel status I was. Kind of not happy. But oh my god. It was so good. The first half, or maybe even 2/3rds, of the book is very slice-of-life, with Nona going to school & planning her birthday party (despite being only 6mo old). You can tell there is more Plot happening, but Nona is v much oblivious and also being kept out of it. And then the last half/3rd is Plot-Plot-Plot. And my god. That ENDING. Alecto can't get here soon enough, I'm. I need it. I need it. OH. Okay, no, I was right when I said half bc this book is the first split POV, in that every other chapter / every couple chapters is narrated by Jod. (The God Emperor, John Gaius) while he tells his story. It was fascinating, I thought I would hate those chapters, but he is. Such a compelling antagonist, omg. Also there were more memes uwu. First book I ever annotated along with as I was reading, too!! I---

Stopping. Cutting myself off. Sorry; these books make me gush.

5. What genre did you read the most of?

Normally the answer to this is fantasy, but! I think Sci-Fi won out <3

6. Was there anything you meant to read, but never got to?

Yes! Both last year and this year I meant to read some of my spooky-ish books for October and did not. Specifically! I meant to read:

Carmilla & Laura by S.D. Simper -> I have so many of Simper's books on my kindle, but this one is a standalone, which I've been prioritizing so I don't go buy more books w/o reading the ones I have. This is a re-telling, which I was going to read with / around the copy of the original that I have.

Plain Bad Heroines - Emily M. Danforth -> I believe this is told in a dual timeline? After three people are killed at a girls' boarding school, it closes its doors. Over a century later, a bestselling book is written about the girls and inspires a horror-film adaptation, filmed on-site. And I'm just going to use the last line of the goodreads blurb, bc it makes me want to read it now: But as Brookhants opens its gates once again, and our three modern heroines arrive on set to begin filming, past and present become grimly entangled—or perhaps just grimly exploited—and soon it’s impossible to tell where the curse leaves off and Hollywood begins.

My Dearest Darkest by Kayla Cottingham -> One of the books I did start. I'm 9% in. It's a YA novel, also set at a boarding school. A group of girls accidentally summon an eldritch horror who promises to grant their every desire... for a price, which becomes steeper and steeper as time goes on.

The Lost Girls by Sonia Hartl -> Also YA! I got this one recently. A vampire turned by her boyfriend ends up falling for his latest victim, while plotting with his other exes to kill him.

There are a lot more I'm carrying into next year, but I am most disappointed in not getting to those!

Oh, and the Priory of the Orange Tree. (I'm. 20% through. This one is a Beast!!)

10. What was your favorite new release of the year?

I don't buy a lot of new releases for cost reasons---these days most of my books are purchased through ThriftBooks or eBook sales (I am subbed to a few sites which notify you of deals; my favorite of which is BookBub). However! I had Nona pre-ordered <3 So. Nona.

14. What books do you want to finish before the year is over?

any of them.

going into the new year with only 2 books read last/this year makes me very sad 🥺

18. How many books did you buy?

i plead the fifth

also i have no clue

20. What was your most anticipated release? Did it meet your expectations?

gotta go with Nona. i was a weird mix of both unenthused (bc this was supposed to be kind of a side novella) and enthused (bc i love this series and i wish i could do what Tamsyn Muir does) but it not only met but surpassed my expectations. Nona was... Nona's identity was a core mystery of the book; she was, more or less, a brand new character who never showed up in the previous two books, so i was. skeptical of going in, let alone to her pov.

but.

it was so good.

i. already gushed about it. i'm not. i'm not going to do it again.

24. Did you DNF anything? Why?

think i might be DNFing The Bookshop & the Barbarian. love the premise but i've noticed. a few issues in the text.

one i have def for sure DNF'd is Alma Katsu's The Deep. her books are horror + historical fiction. i finished The Hunger (which follows the Donner Party) but it was. very much a slog. i didn't like most of the characters, the horror was there but the reveal was lackluster to me. it got 3 stars tho bc it was very much a "this book isn't bad, just not for me" type of read? (there was an aspect i did like / even found kind of funny, but i--- hm. ig if you go in not knowing like, the names of the party members it would be a spoiler to say it, but otherwise i guess its... not a spoiler? idk??? i dunno, there was a subversion that i loved, but also i'm not super familiar with the specificities of the Donner Party so it may not have even been a subversion, if her telling was that accurate? i realize this is vague. apologies.)

The Deep is supposed to be abt the Titanic which. i love the Titanic, and i love ocean horror (it's a close second to arctic horror for me, and one day i want to find a book that scratches the same itch as The White Vault podcast does). but i realized early on that it wasn't a match for me, and i wish i had DNF'd The Hunger as well.

25. What reading goals do you have for next year?

my reading goals are the same every year---26 books. that's a book every other week! originally i used to set it to 52 but i've had too many bad reading years.

my secondary reading goal is to cut my TBR (of books i own) in half. i don't. i don't want to admit how many that is bc. just looking at the number on my kindle makes me feel bad.