#I really struggle with that scene
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Listen, I love the Night Nurse as a character. I love Ruth Connell, period.
But when she stands there in Charles' memories and watches him get beaten with a belt and then takes the words he cried at his father to beat him down further "No, you can't make it better. You never made it better, then you died."
I have yet to forgive her for that. It is, without a doubt, one of the cruellest lines I've ever heard in film or television.
#I really struggle with that scene#I don't “skip” it because I want my rewatches to count#but fuck me#If I don't manage to turn down the sound in time and close my eyes it still triggers me bad#And that fucken line is like salt on the wound#dead boy detectives#charles rowland#night nurse#dbda#cw: abuse mention#ruth connell#jayden revri
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Look what we've become.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#Initially I wanted to do a 'Mutiny' quote to follow the 'Luck runs out' quote.#But the musical earworms demanded a different blood to be drawn. And I think it works just as well.#Alright. It's time to confess something. I really struggled with this comic. I didn't want to draw it. Then I didn't want to upload it.#Because I knew I would be here in the tags writing and backspacing for hours trying to articulate my thoughts.#I'm going to talk about death and grief in the tags today so this is your WARNING to look away if you aren't in a headspace for it.#Sometimes in media there are scenes and characters which land on topics so specific to your wounds that it reopens them all over again.#Because here's the truth. When you've known someone like this for nearly your whole life...it doesn't matter how bad the fight is.#You always think 'We'll always have time. One day this dust will settle and we'll rebuild the bridge.'#And then the fucker dies!!! He dies and suddenly there will never ever be time to repair the rift.#Someone you loved died thinking you hated them. And part of you did just a bit. But love and hate aren't mutually exclusive.#He's fucking dead and you are left with so many broken and unfinished pieces between the two of you.#Jiang Cheng loses Wei Wuxian thinking that WWX thought they hated each other.#He's a younger brother who will one day be older than the person he lost.#Who has no one else in the world who understands those feelings of love and hate and grief.#I can't be normal about this character. I don't think he even heals me. Zero catharsis to be gained here.#I just look at his sour grape ass and think 'shit that's a little too close to home.' JC is my discomfort character.#I'm probably going to regret being this vulnerable in the tags in like. An hour. So. sorry if you see this once and never again.#EDIT: Yeah sorry this took 4 hours to muster the courage to post. Surprise update!#EDIT 2: You guys were being too nice to me on my sad comic to point out the spelling error. I have fixed it now B'*)
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"You're my guys....Those other toys, they don’t…spark joy."
#my first gif lol#it's really rough. and as u can see by me posting this at 2AM it um. was a struggle heh#there were a lot more scenes i wanted to include but coloring the frames took forever so i had to cut it short#but basically. chuck loves to watch them sufferrrr#putting those guys in situations and watching them squirm#also i kept it mostly dean centric bc he's chuck's favorite doll#i was also going to end it on dean's death but. i could not bring myself to screenshot that so. despair ending so true. that's the last ep#spnsept24#myedits#mygifs
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Rick and Michonne Grimes - Their Journey Over the Years
It's a broken world, Michonne. And you're the only thing that puts it back together. Til my last breath I am yours.
#the walking dead#the ones who live#rick grimes#michonne grimes#danai gurira#tvedit#nessa007#chewieblog#richonne#userstream#usergif#dailyflicks#richonnegifs#dailytwd#cinematv#twdedit#towledit#tvarchive#otpsource#romancegifs#denim rose graphics#ajshxbsjakaksksk aka me screaming internally; I’m so excited to share this with you all#I think this is the most ambitious gifset I’ve ever made??? but I really wanted to see it through#I chose to do a page for each era of their story (S3; S4; S5; S6-7; S8-10; and finally TOWL)#I’ve wanted to do a magazine layout for a couple yrs now but I was too lazy lol#but when the urge came round again this time for Richonne I got my butt up and immediately started sketching thumbnails#I struggled to come up with a time for the mag cover until I remembered the last (?) TWD supply drop chose the CRM Tribune as its theme#tbh researching mag covers; trying to match fonts; hunting down scenes...it’s been some long nights#the amount of sleep I’ve lost over this set lol but I’m SO SO happy with the final outcome; love these two and their story#I hope you all enjoy!!
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For the Laicion nation (aka, me and three other people)
I had this illustration commissioned (a big thank you to @lunehowls) for my werewolf AU Laicion fic (still a WIP).
The general pitch is as follows :
AU in which Laios never got to meet his sister again, putting his life on a whole other path, a more desperate one. A military deserter with barely a coin to his name, Laios hitches a ride on a boat to one of the elven continents, where he learns about magical tattoos that binds one’s soul to a wolf’s, effectively making them artificial werewolves. Illegal magic be damned, this feels like the answer to… everything.
In the process, he learns about the existence of an illegal fighting ring in one of the elven cities, where beastmen gladiators gather. Freshly tattooed and without anywhere else to go to, Laios decides to head there, where he meets Lycion, an elf and artificial werewolf gladiator. If they first bond over a simple shared meal, by spending time together (sharing the same room in the barracks, maybe the same bed? gasp) they find that they have a lot in common, notably a shared distaste for the body they were born in, a dysphoria partially remedied by becoming a werewolf.
They bond :)
NB: I commissioned another piece, go take a look :D
#dungeon meshi#laios touden#lycion#laicion#I'm heads deep in research regarding Ancient Rome gladiators... and loving it. Really fascinating stuff.#I bemoan the fact that most papers are locked behind a paywall (though I found one that gives a free pdf access)#(and no. Sci-hub is not an option. It's blocked in my country)#I'm also re-reading DunMeshi and taking notes to get a better grasp of Laios and Lycion as characters. Character studies if you will#and I still need to fully outline the fic#I know where I'm starting (struggling to choose a POV for that first chapter LOL) and where I'm ending so there's that#and a bunch of disconnected scenes (as we all do ahaha)#anyway. Doing all of this while studying for veterinary school. It's hard. I feel guilty whenever I'm not studying...#let's just say I don't expect the prep work for the fic to be ready before this summer (+ I need to finish the Kuro cosplay for Japan Expo)#hopefully; once it's done; I'll be able to set a schedule and write smoothly#werewolf#werewolf laios#rarepair#Fy posts
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Bridgerton - S3E02 “How Bright the Moon” // S3E03 “Forces of Nature”
#bridgertonedit#polinedit#tvedit#perioddramaedit#romanceedit#dailypolin#dailybridgerton#bridgertonblr#cinemapix#dailyflicks#filmtvtoday#bridgerton#polin#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington#bridgerton spoilers#edit#my gifs#my toxic trait is being unable to make up my mind on how i prefer to color gifs#though it's a struggle regardless#anyway let me wax poetic about the journal scene/hand cut scene for a bit (not depicted here but related)#the scene that (imo) started changing colin's perception of pen#having colin's writing focus more on his inner struggles particularly with intimacy/connection#and then following that up with having him share an intimate moment with someone he already deeply cares about#who cares for him in return and uplifts him#ugh I love it#i can forgive that the scene wasn't as long as it was in the books (because I do really love the deep talk they have in the book version)
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The entire idea of "talking to someone about a show you both like but it turns out theyre normal about and youre obsessed" is SO real with pnf cuz there's SUCH a difference between "i watched and enjoyed it as a kid" and "ive spent the last 12 years of my life learning the entire script to this show by heart" and it gets SOO embarrassing sometimes lmao
#a real struggle (its not really tbf)#but fr tho i LOVE quoting amy obscure scene i feel like at any time#phineas and ferb#pnf#shitpost
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I find it funny when my published author friends be like....
"Your Writing is so good. You should dream bigger. Why stop at MERE fanfics?"
me: firstly, thinking that any other form of writing is more respectable than fanfic-writing is so 2003. Secondly, becoming a NY best selling author is YOUR dream. My dream is to write my otp into every romantic au possible while drinking wine and petting my cat.
Them: it doesn't hurt to actually try and write for money
Me: nah, I'm good right here, man. Money? I have a shitty daytime job for that
#i will go broke for my fanfic-writing#tomorrow i dream bigger but today i finish the scene where my otp fight over what colour a flamingo really is#ao3 writer#fanfiction#writing#writer problems#fanfiction writing#writer life#writing community#writer woes#writers on tumblr#writing struggles#creative writing#writing stuff#on writing#writing things#writing problems#writer stuff#writblr#writerscommunity#writer motivation#writer humor
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#criminal minds#criminalmindsedit#criminalmindsverse#proceduraledit#emily prentiss#emilyprentissedit#cmverse#cmverseedit#criminal minds evolution#cmevolutionedit#tvedit#filmtvcentral#dailyflicks#ladiesblr#femalecharacters#bitchys#mine#edit#*#internal*#evidence*#p r o o f#i have been struggling for AGES with how i wanted to do a set pairing the lauren arc and the 'play along' scene#and then cme just gifted me this perfect container scene *chef's kiss* i know there's hella nuance that needs to be read into this set#(like the warehouse scene is really just representative of her mindset undercover) but i think you guys Get It#otp: you are who you pretend to be#(feels so ... to use that tag on this set specifically but it's also exactly how i ship them - as emily's coping mechanism - so!!!)#someday i will let go of the lauren arc. someday. (no i won't.)#criminal minds evolution spoilers#(tag issue resolved!! sorry for the duplicate set guys you'll never guess what the issue word was)
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Been wanting to draw some fanart for Poor George MAP since it's my favorite one, and because it was its anniversary recently, I finally did it :>
ID: A digital drawing in two panels with characters from Warriors. In the panel above, there's Yellowfang watching Brokenkit play with a moss ball, she looks endearingly at the little kit; they're in a green environment and plants surround them. In the panel below, Yellowfang is in the same possition, looking down at an adult Brokenstar at her feet, already dead, she looks sorrowful. Fireheart is by her side, looking at her with compassion. They're at ThunderClan's medicine den.
#irbis draws#fanart#warrior cats#warriors#warrior cats fanart#yellowfang#brokenstar#fireheart#firestar#thunderclan#shadowclan#cw animal death#animal death#poor george map#i really love this map. it brought me to tears at the part where yellowfang decides to blind brokenstar but still sees her little kit in hi#i remember when i first watched it i was procrastinating a very complicated project#i'm working in a quite stressful project rn too but ive got more sense of things and im almost done with uni!!!#and its still my favorite. i had heard of it like a week before it released and already liked the song aaa#and then the whole pacing was just perfect#also the scene where brokentail kills his father felt so real. i could feel raggedstar's struggle to survive#woaaah#very amazing map#AND THE CREDITS SEQUENCE#im gonna turn this into a ted talk goodbye
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I think any fix-it mouthwashing au has to have the mandatory scenes of Curly either being able to blink again or speaking for the first time.
#like metaphorical nature aside can you like fathom the relief in being able to hear your voice again? or like blink your eye even if manualy#how many times to you think the phantom actions triggers only for nothing to happen to be asked something and it catch in his throat from h#his torn vocal cords probably from how loud and hard he was screaming in agony#or the feeling of having to cry with tears and the instinct to blink them away like those little relief would make him break down#also just like I want the fix it au to have a scene of Anya feeling truly safe and content with nothign in the back of her mind#like I like playing with the struggles and angst but really just have her subtly realize shes fine alone or with one of them I dont care#shes like reading and someone unintentionally sneaks up on her but she doesnt jump or she wakes up and its not the first thought in her min#or maybe just her realizing she can finally push it away maybe someone not recognizing her or Curly from the incident and realizing it wont#define her forever and she'll move past it like please let them be happy have them meet Daisuke's family who pointedly dont ask#or Swansea appriciating his kids in a way Daisukes didn't appiciate their useful ray of sunshine like LET THEM SMILE#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#captain curly#curly mouthwashing
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The doll collector community is so full of toxic, mindless overconsumption.
"I don't like this doll, but I'm going to buy it anyway! Actually, I'll buy 2!"
Or you could... I don't know... save your money and leave the dolls for people who actually want them? Just a wild thought.
#You ever struggled to get a doll you REALLY want because it's out of stock?#Yeah I blame these kinda mfs. 😒#And scalpers of course.#dollblr#doll community#doll collectors#barbie#bratz#my scene#monster high#ever after high#rainbow high#shadow high#doll collecting#overconsumption#mindless consumption#rant#txt
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Council of lovefools.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang yanli#jiang cheng#They don't have an actual sleepover in this scene but the vibes were so sleepover coded...I had to get them cozied up.#Late night talks with friends and family are some of the best conversations.#My siblings and I used to have room sleepovers with each other (Actually an excuse to stay up and talk about runescape)#Currently my flatmates and I also have really great heart to hearts late into the night.#Pondering shit like 'What defines confidence?“ and ”Why are people terrified of letting themselves fall in love?"#All that aside; There is a really great conversation between JC and WWX here. They are so close and yet so far way from each other!#Fundamentally they *agree* about many things - but JC now has to play the role of someone more 'mature'.#His temper is reigned in and he had to take a more nuanced approach. Whereas WWX can be far more reactionary.#JC has changed to become someone more mature (or at least he is trying).#Contrast this attitude with the scene *right* after where WWX literally goes baby mode with JYL. Rolling around going “I'm Fwee years old”.#When children are hurt we comfort them with hugs and warm food and a laugh. It's not enough when you're an adult. It's not simple anymore.#WWX is stuck in the past when everyone else is shifting and moving on! It's a depression allegory (and just...actual depression)#But we also get to see how some things have stayed the same. They still bicker about soup. They still tease. They are still together.#They all care for each other very much but they are struggling against trauma and are not equipped to talk about it.#You can't really blame WWX for being so protective over JYL. But JC is right: “You don't have a say in who she likes.”#It may have started as an arranged marriage but *she* is *choosing* what her heart wants. JC sees that. WWX cannot.#The final act of love is letting go after all.
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out of all the hollyleaf chapters, this one from outcast has always really stuck with me in the way it resonated in constantly being taught that finding a husband and settling down to have kids was an expectation or even a path to happiness. squirrelflight's response isn't to tell her that she doesn't have to have children, that she doesn't need to become a mother if she doesn't want to - instead it's to assure her that her "path is marked out" and "she can have kits and still return to the warrior's den". hollypaw's pov chapter comes after lionpaw's and jaypaw's, neither of which have to deal with these questions and struggles. i'd be curious to hear the author's intentions behind the scene- it's interesting characterization - one that resonated with me obviously - but it's so strange to see in a children's book, one by authors who at the very least hold milquetoast liberal politics, be unable to outright have their authority figure in the scene, the one whom the child readers are meant to look to as guidance, say "you don't need to have children if you don't want to, you're not any less for not wanting them" and instead don't acknowledge the idea of not having kits and instead try and say, albeit in a less blunt way, "you can still have babies and a career! you can find a way to have children and still pursue your goals!" which isn't the Good Message shit approach they think it is.
this isn't really meant to be an organized piece of analysis, i just wanted to revisit a scene that really stuck with me as a young kid struggling with my identity. surprisingly out of everything in po3, this is really what made me resonate with the idea of hollyleaf being a lesbian.
#deer rambles#there's probably a better analysis to be made#but i think i just kiind of wanted to ramble about my own personal feelings#as i said. i just remember this scene so well#and i think it stuck with me for a reason ya know? not because it's good#but because it's a struggle that isn't really explored. the authors dont think of these concerns as society born#to them. this is just what young girls and women deal with. these concerns materialize by virtue of being a “woman”#they are not created they are not taught they are just values that exist nebulously
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Joshua Twewy truly the character of all time because Joshua Twewy can be anything. He can be your princess he can be your cringefail loser he can be your wet kitten he can be your homoerotic teen friendship he can be your evil mastermind he can be your tortured meow meow he can be a girlboss he can be your bubblegum bitch.
Perfectly written to be open to interpretation. The amount of times you'll be talking to a twewy fan and the Josh Topic will come up and they'll just go "no no no, here's what Joshua's deal actually is."
And then proceed to pull a completely unique and textually supported Josh Take out of seemingly thin air.
Breathtaking.
#they put the strangest character sauce in that boy and then promptly lost the recipe#on a cosmic level. twewy really is /joshua's/ story.#yet we hardly know anything about him#and yet hes also the character you FEEL. deep down in your bones and the part of your brain thats just eternally 14#i just started thinking about the scene in neo where neku is struggling to hold an entire citys consiousness in his mind#and the strain is threatening to kill him.#and then josh shows up and smirks and suddenly he can Do It.#like. the amount of CONFIDENCE you need to have in your character writing to make that scene ANYTHING#what does it mean????? we the audience certainly dont know#neku and joshuas relationship is a secret between neku and joshua and theyre not telling. we asked.#twewy#the world ends with you#joshua kiryu#yoshiya kiryu#twewy joshua#yoshiya 'joshua' kiryu
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Lestat, struggling to ask Louis about September 8th.
INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE S02E08 - “AND THAT’S THE END OF IT. THERE’S NOTHING ELSE”
#Interview with the Vampire#IWTV#iwtvedit#iwtvsource#Lestat de Lioncourt#tvedit#tvgifs#filmtvcentral#filmtvdaily#filmtvedit#cinemapix#mine*#mygifs#iwtvmine#IWTV 2#you really don't know. you just can't even begin to imagine how feral this makes me feel. because he could have asked ANYTHING#it's been DECADES since that night and he could have asked anything else. but no. he had to ask if he had hurt himself#he hadn't known PEACE since the moment Armand called him. and yet... the moment he CAN ask Louis about it? HE STILL STRUGGLES#the way he avoids his eyes. that bit right there. AHHHHHHHHHH. I want to scream!#also. I wish I could say I can officially move on from giffing this scene but I'm not sure. it's just so great to color#(it's always been the same coloring but it still amazes me how happy I am with it hahahaha)
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