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tsukimara · 2 days ago

Note

Oh wow.. r-request are open.. t-Tsuki-Chan… w-well don’t mind if I do.. c-can you w-write f-Floyd, Riddle, and Epel with a jellyfish s/o w-who can’t control their stings.. hehe.. *blushes cutely.*

—🎀

๋࣭ ˖ 𐔌Boys with jellyfish S/O who can't control their stings!࿐ . ۫

-ˏˋ⋆➔ Characters: Floyd, Riddle and Epel <3

-ˏˋ⋆➔ Hcs, Fluff, Romantic (but it can also be read as platonic), Gn!reader

-ˏˋ⋆➔ Warnings: None!

-ˏˋ⋆➔ A/N: AAAA HELLO 🎀ANON!! T-thank you for y-your request... *Looks away blushing* (We are not crazy I promise)

FLOYD:

• A sea creature? And a jellyfish at that?! You 100% got his attention!

• LIKE OMGGG YOU'RE SO CUTE!! Let him squeeze your cheeks!!!!!

• This boy is so in loveeee.

• He just needs to hug you- !! Oh this sting was unexpected. You can't control it? Well that's fine, that doesn't stop him from hugging you!

• He wouldn't take it too seriously, he'd just laugh it off and ignore your stings.

• In short, he will test how many times he will get sting if he hugs you for a long time. He won't lie your cuddles are interesting now!

• Sometimes he touches your cnidocytes specifically to see how they feel. He doesn't do it often because he doesn't want to get stings all over his hands.

• But if he's in a bad mood he can get a little irritated but don't worry! It will pass quickly when he remembers that you can't control it and he will go back to teasing you.

• Floyd is an electric eel (correct me if I'm wrong), right? If so, I doubt he would feel your sting very much. They would actually tickle him a little.

• He'd love to help you control your stings but doesn't really know how. Even though they don't bother him, he knows you don't want to sting EVERYONE who touches you.

• Like hey don't be sad! Hug him instead of others! He doesn't mind.

• He actually thinks it's a good 'weapon' to scare others away if they bother you.

• Still, he will help you, he will ask others and look for information.

• "Sorry I sting you again..." "Sting? It was more like a little pinch than a sting zappy!"

• Ah yes, his nicknames.

• He likes to tease you for not being able to control your stings so he gave you the nickname 'zappy'.

RIDDLE:

• Ummm, that's interesting..

• I think he would be slightly interested in your cnidocytes, but that doesn't mean he wants to touch them.

• He's not much of an affectionate person so he's not too worried about being stinged by you.

• However, if he was standing too close to you and you accidentally touched him with your cnidocytes, expect a yelp from him.

• He'll think you did it on purpose so he'll scold you.

• "Hey! That hurt! You can't do that. What if you hurt someone else? Your behavior is incorrect." "I'm so sorry Riddle!!! I don't know how to control them!" Oh-

• Since you told him that, he'll pay a little more attention when he comes near you. Not in a bad way but he doesn't want to get sting again.

• Now he'll know he can't scold you so much for something you can't control.

• Of course he will also tell you to be careful because he doesn't want anyone to get hurt (Actually he doesn't want you to feel guilty but he won't admit it).

• For that he will try to help you with them somehow. No matter what, he will look for a solution to your problem so you don't have to worry about it anymore.

• He knows that every time you tried to hug someone it always ended badly so you stopped trying to hug others.

• Riddle isn't really used to things like affection, but he'll try to dress up so you can't sting him and he'll let you hug him a bit.

• Just don't tell anyone!

• He will dress like this most of the time until you guys find a solution to control your sting.

EPEL:

• Epel doesn't really know how to react.

• Yes, you have something cool to defend yourself but he won't lie, he doesn't really like being stinged.

• But when he finds out that you don't do it on purpose, he will look at it differently.

• "Ouch! What was that for?- Ah right, that was unintentional." He'll try not to sound mad at you because he's not, he just never expects to get stinged.

• Over time he will get used to them and will say that you can knock down whoever you want!

• When he gets sting, he claims it didn't hurt him at all, showing that he is tough.

• It actually hurt him, but he didn't want you to think he was weak or you to blame yourself!!

• " !!- N-no, What are you talking about? Uhh... It doesn't hurt that much! See? I'm not as weak as others."

• He says it would be fun to prank someone with your stings.

• Epel is not a very affectionate person but he doesn't mind physical contact, sometimes it just makes him blush.

• That's why he will dress in such a way that you can hug him or hold his hand without worrying about hurting him.

• Even if the clothes don't fit and Vil might pick on him, he'll still dress like that. He wants to show you that he cares about you!

• He will help you control your stings, no matter if he will have to read thousands of books or ask everyone in the world if it means it will help you.

• He will even try to get something that can help you control them!

• If that means you'll be happy then he will be too!

-ˏˋ⋆➔ Twisted Wonderland Masterlist

-ˏˋ⋆➔ Masterlist

-ˏˋ⋆➔ Rules request

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judysxnd · 1 day ago

Note

If you're taking requests for Lando, and are comfortable writing angst. I'm in one of those moods where I need gut-wrenching neglected girlfriend being called clingy and then him grovelling for forgiveness. You don't have to write it, I just really have been in an angsty mood.

Sparkle anon

As usual I don't like what I did, but I have been starting this like a thousand times and never finished it and this time I did. So I'll go with the flow. I hope you'll like it !

I took so much time to write this that your mood probably changed like a thousand times 😭 I'm sorry 😔

———————————————————————

These past few days have been hard for you. Lando has been away for the past three weeks because it was a triple header and you couldn't come with him because of work. You always thought that being famous too would help you have clear weekends to come to the races, but apparently not. You had ads to film, shoots for magazines to do, interviews to prepare and do too, and it was getting overwhelming.

And Lando being in a different time zone definitely didn't help. You barely could texts, or one would respond hours later, the phone calls only last a few minutes (when you can actually call each other) and it wasn't enough for you these days. Your anxiety was getting the best of you, resulting in a few panic attacks daily.

Usually Lando helps a lot, but he had enough stuff on his plate too. He was in a tough battle with Max for the championship, and from what you've seen and what he had told you a bit, he was struggling with the car this week-end. You tried to make it work as much as you could. But you just couldn't do it anymore. You were back at Monaco after working hard until Saturday afternoon, actually coming home at Lando's place around 9pm, crying yourself to sleep, not even eating.

You knew Lando would be back for a few days from Vegas for a couple of days before flying to Qatar. But you definitely didn't expect to wake up at almost 5pm the next day by noises in the kitchen. First of all, how did you sleep that much? You were tired but damn, that's like 18hours of sleep ! And second of all, who was in the kitchen?

You slowly walked, carefully listening to the noises. After leaning a bit, you saw Lando searching the fridge for something to eat.

"Oh my god" you said relieved it was him. "you scared me so much!" you said walking to him, hugging him from behind.

"I scared you- in my own place?"

"yeah as you were in a different country" you leaned onto the counter next to him. "how did it go?" you asked about the race. Yes you didn't watch it as you slept half a day. You were going to watch it as you woke up, before Lando gets back, but well, you definitely didn't have time for that apparently.

"not good" Lando said barely looking at you

"oh" he walked out of the kitchen "but where did you finish?"

"You didn't watch the race?" he asked, going to the living room to eat at the table

"Well, I wanted to, but as you can see I.. overslept" he stared at you, as he was judging you "and you came back before I could watch it, so might as well tell me directly" you sat in front of him

"Well I lost the championship and finished P6, behind Max at the race. Happy?"

"Why are you so mad at me? It's not my fault, I'm just trying to know what happened to support you"

"support me? You weren't even there for that"

"ugh, excuse me? Sorry for having a career of my own, which I might give up with everything happening at the same time"

"like you can't take at least one day to come watch the race"

"that's the only thing you got from what I just said?" you stood up "what the hell Lando? What happened for you to treat me like that? I've been working my ass off, trying to contain my panic attacks all alone because you also have a career and can't be by my side 24/7, you barely even answer my text, you don't call me, you don't even ask me how I am doing!" He just stared at you, not saying anything. "you know what? I think I was better alone" you said, leaving the room, heading to his bedroom to gather your stuff.

"Wait- where are you going?" he said following you, like he suddenly cared.

"I'm going to my parents for a while. I haven't seen them in 2 months between my work and the races. And you're leaving like in two days anyway so, might as well try to have a good time with people that actually care about me" And before he could say anything, you were out of his sight, driving to the nearest airport to fly to your parents (trying to avoid to cry and have many panic attacks on your way).

You knew Lando wouldn't fly to you for the next two weeks with the races getting all of his time. But he did harass you with texts, tried to call you, which you ignored. He also sent you flowers, many flowers, gifts with little cards, apologising and asking for you to answer his texts and calls. You did feel guilty, even if you made it clear that he neglected you, you felt bad for keeping it to yourself that long and just lashing onto him like that.

You watched the last two races of the year, a knot in your stomach. You felt like you made it worse by acting like that and ignoring him. Hell he could have an accident and not make it back and that would be the last thing you said to him? That is a very bad scenario but still. And at the same time, your pride was telling you to keep ignoring him, that you were right and that he was the one to come back to you (which he was actually trying to do).

Until the next Monday after the last race, when you heard a knock to your bedroom. Innocently thinking it was your mom, you told "her" to come in, only to be faced by Lando holding flowers in his hand. You were laying in bed, in your pyjamas at 3pm, scrolling on your phone.

"Lando? What are you doing here?" You said, sitting up.

"You didn't give me other choices" you nodded, admitting that it was true. "I'm sorry for being a bad boyfriend" he said, taking a step closer to you

"keep going" you said, crossing your arms

"I shouldn't have neglected you like that even if I get too busy at work. I know you always take time for me even though you're working too and I should do the same thing" he sat down at the edge of your bed

"hm hm" you nodded

"I know you didn't read my texts nor listened to my voice messages or voicemails, but I've been apologising for a thousand times and, I've been begging you not to breakup with me" you couldn't help but laugh

"I've listened to them" you admitted

"w-were they good?" you tilted your head "you know I'm not good for that type of stuff"

"You're getting there"

"So what are you saying? Are we good?" you leaned a bit closer to him

"No we're not good Lando. It's not a bunch of texts, calls and gifts that are going to make me forget what happened. Hell I told you I wanted to abandon my entire career and you didn't even react" he was about to say something but you cut him off "and I know it's been very tough for you too for the races, that's why I gave you the benefit of doubt when you were away, but- you were sitting in front of me Lando-"

"I know, I know" he sat right in front of you, holding your hands "we've been dating for a year and- honestly I don't know what happened. When I came back from São Paulo you were there for me, and thank god you were, but I think it's just, it went to my head and I was under so much pressure" you wanted to cut him off but he didn't let you "and I'm not making up excuses for what I did. I just don't want to lose you. I'm so sorry, I'll do anything for you not to leave me, just please, don't go. It won't happen again, I promise" you sighed

"I wasn't going to leave you Lando" you had a little smile. You could see it in his eyes. He was scared he really messed up to the point you were actually going to leave him for good. Maybe stepping away for a few weeks made him think, like for you.

"Really?" He seemed genuinely surprised

"Yes, but I needed some time, like you did too"

"yes. I'm so sorry. I love you so much. I won't do it again"

"You better not" you both laughed a little. "I love you too"

"Not as much as I do" and he immediately leaned in to kiss you. "Now I need to give those flowers to your mother because she helped me to get to talk to you" you gasped as he stood up

"of course she did" you laughed "and to think those flowers were for me? I'm offended" you joked

"Didn't you get enough with everything I sent you?" you tilted your head "too soon?" you both laughed

"yeah, too soon" he left the room. You got up and followed him down the stairs.

#fanfic #imagine #oneshot #lando imagine #lando norris imagine #lando x reader #lando norris #lando norris fanfic #lando norris x you #lando norris x y/n #lando norris x reader #lando norris fic #lando norris one shot #lando norris fanfiction

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an-au-blog · 1 day ago

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modern academic au where viktor just can't get his peace and quiet in the library. Because every time he tries to study, there's this damned himbo that trails him around asking him what he's researching with a big goofy smile. It's always "do you want me to carry your books" and "oh I haven't read that one yet, is it good," and so on and so forth. And in his mind, it's like "just because I'm using a cain doesn't mean I need your help, and yeah of course you haven't read it, you're probably in with some sports scholarship or whatever" but he never voices it. He's the headmaster's portage and he can't go around being rude to random people in the library. Plus, it's not like the other man stays too long, he goes to classes and secludes himself to study as well.

Around exam season, the man stopped hanging off his arm so much, they didn't cross paths in the library or in the halls, but once or twice, Viktor would see him with books about physics, electronics and other things Viktor had been researching before. He never approached him, but he was a bit amused at the seriousness in his expression while he was scribbling something in his notebooks.

If the man WAS on a sports scholarship, perhaps he was reading those books to find a way to talk to Viktor more and in all honesty, it would have been the most someone had done to get to flirt with him, so what if he thought it was a little sweet... it wasn't as if he would expect though. No. His studies were far too important to be put on the back burner for a guy who thought a bone crushing hug (that usually lasts too long for it to be just friendly) was an adequate way to greet an acquaintance.

One day, Viktor found a notebook with research that could be groundbreaking one day. It was past closing hours for the academy, but he had keys so he was left to read all the notes throughout the whole night and even into the day. The neat handwriting, the diagrams, the brilliant ideas... whoever this person was, he was flowing in potential. And when Viktor turned each page he couldn't help but smile to himself, how silly and a bit narcissistic, to sign your name on each of them. Jayce Talis, Jayce Talis, Jace Talis, Jayce Talis, each page, just Jayce Talis, Jayce-

"Hey!"

A familiar voice called for him. Out of breath and disheveled, stood the man who had been trailing him around.

"Oh, I'm so glad I found it- I mean you-" He sagged with relief. But when his eyes flickered from the notes to Viktor and back, he seemed to get a bit sheepish. "I thought I lost them." A whisper to himself before he snapped his eyes back to Viktor. "Ah, uh... you read all of them?"

And there he was, flirting with the same lame excuse, Viktor thought.

"Yes," he decided to humour him a bit. Closing the book and pulling it away from the other. "I was hoping to return it to it's owner, maybe discuss some of the ideas in it."

The man didn't seem to take the hint as he sat across from him with a small smile. "Yeah? So you don't think it's an obnoxious or ridiculous idea?"

"Ridiculous? Perhaps a bit, but it is not obnoxious to want natural resources of this quantity to produce -" He stopped himself, this random guy didn't need to hear it. "Nevermind, you don't need to hear that." Viktor was ready to stand up until he felt a hand reach for his to make him stay.

"No, no! I really want to hear it! Every professor I've tried showing my research to has told me I'm being unrealistic. But I think that with enough time, and effort, it's possible!" His face was glowing. "I mean as far as energy sources go, this could save much for both the people and companies. See- " grabbed one of the notebooks and started flipping through it, "right here, I tried to make a model of-"

"Jayce?" Viktor asked in disbelief.

The other man looked up at him with that dumb smile again. "Yes?"

"Jayce Talis...?"

Jayce tilted his head in question. "Yes?" He asked with more hesitance.

"You are Jayce Talis?" Viktor lifted up the notebook, pointing at the place where the name was signed.

"Did I not introduce myself the first time we met?"

"No!"

Jayce laughed a little awkward chuckle and it made Viktor's chest constrict. With anger, probably...

"Well, I'm sorry, um. My name is Jayce." He reached his hand out for a shake. "Nice to meet you."

"Viktor." He took it. "Likewise." And he found himself meaning it.

#jayce arcane #arcane viktor #jayce x viktor #jayvik #arcane #jayce talis #i haven't written an au post in so long wow #library au

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ofstarsandvibranium · 8 hours ago

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My Cup of Tea

Fandom: Marvel (Celebrity AU)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

Summary: You’ve spent 2 years trying to get Bucky Barnes on your interview show Coffee Shop Date and the chemistry is undeniable between you two.

You watch as Bucky takes a seat across from you. The small cafe in Brooklyn was empty besides you two. The smell of coffee beans brewing and pastries baking fill the air.

“So…it’s happened,” You state plainly.

Bucky chuckles as he settles into his seat more, “It has.”

“Did you finally get tired of rejecting me?” you ask with a teasing tilt of your head and a smirk on your lips. This has always been how you and Bucky behaved around each other at events.

It all started one fateful night at the Emmy's. His show, Echoes of the Crown, being nominated for Best Drama Series. He came up to you on the red carpet and he exclaimed excitement because he's watched your show. You then invited him to come on and he said he'd have to get back to you since his schedule is packed at the moment.

For the past two year, you've been keeping in contact with him and his publicist to see if your schedules would align. In-between that, you'd constantly tease him at events and award shows about how he keeps ghosting you. People of the internet have commented on the clear chemistry between you two, hoping that some day the stars would align and he'd be on your show.

After all this time, he's finally found the time to come onto your show Coffee Shop Date.

He laughs, “I wasn’t rejecting you! I’ve been busy!”

You roll your eyes, seemingly unconvinced, “That’s basically a nice way of rejecting someone, James.”

He playfully winces, “Oh boy. My government name. I’m in trouble, aren’t I?”

You take a sip from your mug. The cafe uses an array of mismatched dish and drinkware, giving the overall vibes of the place very fun and homey.

You change the subject, “Is this your go to place?”

He looks around and nods, “Yeah. One of my favorite places to go to when I’m home. They’ve been around for over fifty years.”

“It’s cute.”

“You’re cute.” Bucky says with a grin.

You bite back a smirk, “What’s your go to coffee order?”

“Black coffee or cold brew.”

You raise a brow at him, “No sugar? Do you hate sweet things?”

He smirks at you, “If I hated sweet things, I wouldn’t be on this date with you, would I?”

"Alright then, Casanova."

"You're not fond of black coffee?"

"Not my cup of tea," you say jokingly as you lift your mug to your lips for a sip.

"Well you're my cup of tea."

“…you’re laying it on thick, Barnes. You usually like this on dates?”

“Only when I really like the person.” You hide your smile in your mug and he asks, "What about you? You usually this snarky with your dates?"

You shrug, "Only with the ones who keep cancelling on me."

Bucky chuckles and shakes his head, "How long you gonna hold that over my head, sweetheart?"

"For as long as I want or until I find something else I can hold over you."

He takes a sip from his own cup and then gestures to yours, "You always drink tea?"

You glance down at the cup of hot black tea with milk and sugar and shake your head, "Not always. Depends how I'm feeling. Sometimes I like tea, other days coffee, or even a matcha."

He scrunches his face up in distaste, "I tried matcha and I don't really like it. Tastes like grass and dirt to me."

You scoff, "Maybe because you haven't tried good matcha. Some places have good matcha, others not so much."

"Maybe you can take me to a place with good matcha after all this," he gestures to the cameras and crew.

You look at him in surprise, "Are you asking me on a real date, Barnes?"

"Second date."

"So confident I'd want another date with you?"

He leans back in his chair with a smirk, "Sweetheart, for two years, you've been trying to get me to go on a coffee date with you. I'm pretty sure you'd like to go on a second date with me."

"So cocky."

This playful, flirtatious banter gave you a bit of a thrill. It was fun to flirt with Bucky and tease him. He was obviously a handsome man, but he was also charming and funny. There was just something about him that made you feel a little more daring and comfortable.

"So tell me, what's something that scares you?" he asks, as he rests his elbows on the table, leaning closer to you. His eyes completely focused on you.

"Birds."

He laughs, "Birds?! Specific kinds or all kinds?"

"All. They freak me out with how they fly around, can swoop at you any moment. The talking ones freak me out the most. Animals should not be able to talk back!"

Bucky looks at you in amusement, covering his mouth to muffle his laughter, "That wasn't an answer I was expecting."

"What kind of answer were you expecting then?"

"I don't know! Maybe spiders or heights?"

"Okay, what about you?"

"Reptiles."

"Like snakes?"

"Not just snakes, but also lizards. I don't like how they move. It freaks me out." He answers with seriousness.

You continue to converse with each other until your director yelled cut for time. You and Bucky visibly relax.

"Thank you again for coming on," you say with a genuine smile.

Bucky's eyes twinkle as he nods, "Of course, I mean, you were very persistent for this to happen."

"Well, not just me. The entire internet too. Are you ready for the storm that's about to hit once this airs?"

"I am. I mean, they're all right, we have great chemistry."

"I suppose we do."

"So...how about a real date?"

You can't help but widen your eyes in shock, "Oh, you were serious about that?"

He nods, "Absolutely. I really would like to get to know you better without all the cameras and crew."

"Yes, of course. I can take you to a cafe I know that actually does serve amazing matcha!"

He laughs, "Alright. It's a date!"

______________________________

Bucky Barnes Spotted With Interviewer, Y/N L/N

buckysnumber1fan: SHUT THE FUCK UP. HES FINALLY GOING ON COFFEE SHOP DATE

buckysluvr: FINALLYYYYYY. i love the chemistry they have!

thatoneguyonhere: miss girl is living my dream and im mad but also happy for her. ;__;

jbbhoe: wait, is this a real date or just for coffee shop date????

______________________________

"Well, well, well, look who we have here!" your friend and fellow interviewer, Carol.

You wave at her as you and Bucky approach, "Hi, Carol!" you give her a hug.

"How does it feel to be on the other side of this?" she asks, holding out her mic to you.

You snort, "So weird, but this guy finally convinced me to accompany him," you point to Bucky and he smiles at Carol.

"I told her she had to experience this at least once in her life. And much like her, I'm very persistent when it comes to something I want."

"This must be surreal for both of you considering that a few years ago at this very event, you two met and instantly clicked. Now look at you two!"

Bucky sighs, "Yeah, it's...it's a little funny how we've come to a weird kind of circle moment. We're both back here together, but our relationship with each other has completely changed. But I wouldn't have it any other way." He looks at you with fondness in his eyes and kisses your head.

Carol beams at the affection shared between you two, "Well alright, you two, I'll let you two go. Enjoy the rest of your night and, Bucky, congrats again on another nomination."

"Thanks so much!"

"See you around, Carol!" you wave to your friend as Bucky directs you further down the red carpet.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky imagine #bucky barnes imagine #marvel au #celebrity au

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morlock-holmes · 3 days ago

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Okay, guys, after reading a post by @centrally-unplanned I just took that ACX "AI Turing Test" that Scott Alexander did, and I am screaming, as the kids used to say.

You guys are way, way overthinking this.

I thought I would do better than average, and I guess I did; excluding three pictures I had seen before, I got 31/46 correct.

Not great if you're taking the SAT, but I feel like if I could call a roulette spin correctly 2 times out of 3 I could clean up in Vegas.

So, what is the secret of my amazing, D+ performance?

You have to look at the use of color and composition as tools to draw the eye to points of interest.

AI is really bad at this, when left to its own devices.

For example, here:

Part of the reason to suspect that this is AI is the "AI house style" and the bad hands that I literally only noticed right this exact second as I was typing this sentence. Even if the hands were rendered correctly, I would still clock this as AI.

The focal point of this piece ought to be the face of the woman and the little dragon she is looking at (Just noticed the dragon's wings don't match up either), but take off your glasses or squint at this for a second:

Your eye is being drawn by the bright gold sparkles on the lower right side of the piece. That particular bright gold is only in that spot on the image, but there's no reason to look there, it's just an upper arm and an elbow. The bright light source highlighting the woman's horn separates it out as a point of interest.

Meanwhile, the weird aurora streaming out of the woman's face on the left side means that it is blending in with the background.

In other words, the way the image is composed, and the subject matter suggest that your eye should be drawn here:

But the use of color suggests that you should look here:

That's a senseless place to draw the eye towards! It would be a really weird mistake for a human to make! In fact, I think there's a strong argument that the really close cropped picture of the face of the character is a strong improvement. It's still not a particularly good composition, but at least the color contrast now draws the eye to the proper points.

In fact, I would say that a good reason for my performance not being even better was this alarming statement at the start of the test:

I've tried to crop some pictures of both types into unusual shapes, so it won't be as easy as "everything that's in DALL-E's default aspect ratio is AI".

Uh...

So how about this one:

This is a lot better anatomically and in terms of the use of color and light to draw the eye towards sensible parts of the painting. The lighting makes pretty good sense in terms of coming from a particular direction and it also draws the eye to effectively to the face and the outstretched hand of the figure.

It's also a really flat and meaningless composition and subject matter that no renaissance artist would have chosen. What is this angel doing, exactly? Our eye is drawn to the face and hand, and the figure is looking off towards the left side, at, uh, what exactly?

But then I thought, "Well, maybe Scott chopped out a giant chunk of the picture, and this is just a detail from, like, the lower right eighth of some giant painting with three other figures that makes total sense"

This makes sense as a piece of a larger human made artwork, but if you tell me, "Nope, that's the whole thing and this is the original, un-cropped picture" I'd go, "Oh, AI, obviously.

All of the ones I had trouble with were AI art with good composition and use of color, and human ones with bad composition and use of color. For example, this one:

This has three solid points of interest arranged in an interesting relationship with different colors to block them out. I'd say the biggest tells are that the astronauts' feet are out of frame, which is a weird choice, and looking closely now, the landscape and smoke immediately to the right of the ship don't really make sense.

But again; I had to think, "Maybe Scott just cropped it weird and they had feet in the original picture."

Here's another problem:

StableDiffusion being bad at composition is such a known problem that there are a variety of tools which a person can use to manually block out the composition. In fact, let me try something.

I popped open Krita (Which now has a StableDiffusion plugin) and after literally dozens of generations and a couple of different models I landed on ZavyChromaXL with the following prompt:

concept art of two astronauts walking towards a spaceship on an alien planet, with a giant moon in th background, artstation, classic scifi, book cover

And this was the best I could do:

Not great, but Krita has a tool that lets you break an image into regions which each have different prompts, so I quickly blocked something out:

Each of those color blobs has a different part of the prompt, so the green region has "futuristic astronauts" the blue is the spaceship, the orange is the moon, grey is the ground and pink is the sky, which gives us:

Still way too much, so we can use Krita's adaptive patch tool and AI object removal to get:

I'm not saying it's high art, or even any good, but it's better than the stuff I was getting from a pure prompt, because a human did the composition.

But it's still so dominated by AI processes that it's fair to call it "AI Art".

Which makes me wonder how many of the AI pictures I called out as human made because one of the traits I was looking for, good composition, was in fact, actually made by a human.

#ai art #ai #astral codex ten #scott alexander

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pleasestayawayidonotlikeyou · 2 days ago

Note

Hi!

I have a request for FellSwap Gold bros, UnderSwap bros, and Underfell Bros x SUPER shy reader!!

Reader having really bad social anxiety, has a hard time speaking up and is just super quiet, and just generally nervous all the time due to past trauma.

How do you think the skeletons would act towards an S/O being so shy??

Featuring: Sky, Honey, Red, Edge, Wine and Coffee.

Masterlist

Sky

You remind him of his brother a bit.. not completely since you two have a lot of differences yet it's probably the shy personality.

He has no problem with you being shy! He just wished you'd talk more when you two go out.. oh wait yeah you're socially anxious.

Sky does his best to keep you relaxed, he hates seeing people he loves nervous or anxious, he just hopes the methods he uses with his brother work with you too..

If you ever want to talk about your traumas with him, he'll feel honored, people only do this kind of thing when they trust each other, and to know you trust him enough to talk about traumatic things that have affected you in the past.. it makes him feel like he's one of the most important persons to you.

Please tell him if anything is bothering you, he doesn't want to see you uncomfortable nor panicked.

Honey

"Welcome to the club sweetheart.."

Honey also has a hard type speaking up, more with strangers than with people he's friends with, and his anxiety doesn't help much.

So, why not help each other out?

He's not the best, yet he's always there to listen to you if you'd like, and he'd be very happy if you'd hear him too.

At the end of the day, the books he writes are a distraction- an escape from reality he found to both make money and to do something he enjoys, so maybe you can find something to distract you too?

Your shyness doesn't bother him, if anything it's something he knows is a part of you, and he's always by your side when he can.

Red

Oh well, guess you two aren't really leaving the house..

Red doesn't really like leaving his house, so if he isn't working he's most definitely chilling on the couch.

He's not the best at giving advice, damn, the last time he gave someone advice that person tried to poison him, yet he'll be happy to listen to you if you're ever comfortable enough to do it.

Your shyness and quietness doesn't bother him in the least, it feels kinda good to just.. rant to you about work while cuddling y'know?

"Ya may not even realize, yet cha' make me the happiest skeleton in all earth sweetheart."

Edge

He's the literal opposite of you.

Edge has a talk with you, asking if you would like to have some therapy sessions, and if you agree he's already paying for it.

Tries to convince you to leave the house when he's not working and the weather is good, he doesn't force you but he'd be happy when you successfully socialize with someone, even just a little bit.

Stands up for you, no matter the situation. He's pretty famous because of his cooking you know? Who's gonna turn him down huh? One word and a security guard will take that person away.

He isn't someone to give advice about trauma, if anything he'd much rather hear you trauma-dump, that way he can find the best way to try and help.

Wine

His brother's just like you. He already knows what to do.

Won't force you to leave the house if you don't want to, yet he'll "reward" you with small things when you do, buying ice cream, plushies you want, books or video games if you like them.. you get the deal.

Something he noticed was wherever you go, his brother follows, guess Coffee finally found someone like him huh?

If someone even dares to be slightly rude towards you, Wine makes sure that person won't ever bother you again.

Anything you tell him, he'll give advice, no matter what it is.

Coffee

He's EXACTLY like you.

Coffee has a really bad social anxiety and has a hard time feeling comfortable to talk, so he mostly communicates by notes!

May influence you to do the same as him...

Doesn't bother him that you're quiet, quite the opposite actually, after hearing Rus and Cash ramble for HOURS on the swap papyruses reunion, he couldn't beg more for some silent cuddles with his loved one.

If you ever want to talk about your traumas with him, he's going to listen, even if he doesn't give the best advice.

#undertale #undertale au #sans au #sans undertale #sans x reader #sans #papyrus #papyrus x reader #x reader #utmv #underswap #underswap sans x reader #underswap papyrus x reader #underfell papyrus x reader #underfell sans x reader #underfell #fellswap gold sans x reader #fellswap gold papyrus x reader #fellswap gold

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diangelodork · 3 days ago

Text

guys i’m really bad at writing actual fics so im gonna start posting snippets from fics i have concepts of plans for but go like this “👁️👄👁️” when i try to actually write them so HERES THE FIRST ONE LMAO (payneland, post get together, the monty talk tm - talk of consent and lack thereof, jealous charles rowland)

edwin took a deep breath, steeling himself for what he was about to say. he pressed his fists against one another, lifting his head up to look at his lover who had his legs splayed out in front of himself on their couch. edwin cleared his throat once. “charles, i did- i think it may be wise to delve into my prior feelings about… monty,” he said, treading cautiously. he knew how quickly the mere mention of that name riled his boyfriend up.

“you don’t have to. y’know, if you don’t want to,” charles answered far too quickly, trying for nonchalance, but edwin caught how his shoulders squared off and his fingers tensed. edwin knew that he didn’t want to hear it, but he just wanted to be honest with his boyfriend.

“i’d like to tell you, if you’d let me, my dove,” he said, layering a thick layer of saccharine onto the term of endearment and walked over to the couch. charles was much more amenable to listening to him when he brought out the old-fashioned pet names.

a warm smile broke out onto charles’ face, eyes wrinkled and adoring. he held his hands out, silently asking to be closer to his lover. when edwin sat down beside him, he hauled him up into his lap, sighing at how nicely they fit together. “go on then, love,” charles said, stroking up and down edwin’s arm. charles was purposeful in the way he held him, making it so that his back would be flush up against charles’ chest. not only was it nice to bury his face in his hair, but he wouldn’t be able to see the inevitable frustration on his face when he began regaling tales of monty.

edwin tried to relax into the touch, but it was still something they were working on, the slackening of his rigid posture. the evident discomfort both boys had about the topic certainly didn’t help in this. his head fell to charles’ shoulder in a matter of moments before he readied himself to speak.

“do you remember how he and i went on that walk? after the case of the two dead dragons?” edwin asked.

“mmm,” charles hummed in verification. his jaw was already clenched and edwin hadn’t even said much of anything yet.

“well, we ended up at this children’s park and we sat on the swings and i had told him that we should stop seeing each other,” edwin explained easily, as if it wasn’t even a big deal. seeing each other? charles hadn’t known they were ever officially a thing. edwin was still his best friend then, why hadn’t he told him? he restrained from huffing and let edwin continue without interruption, keeping his hands busy by stroking his thumbs up and down edwin’s sleeves.

“i told him about my…” edwin trailed off for a moment, inhaling the nonexistent scent that would lie on charles’ shoulder. the tension released from his body ever so slightly, and his voice was a bit quieter when he spoke again. “feelings. i told him how much they scared me,” he confessed.

the frustration washed away from charles with edwin’s soft-spoken words, leaving compassion for his lover in their wake. he hated hearing that edwin was scared and that he couldn’t protect him. maybe it was foolish as it was already in the past, but it mattered to him.

“but it seems he misinterpreted me and he… kissed me,” edwin says and oh, charles could seemingly feel the heat rising once more. it seemed he could be angry! what a development!

“oh. cool. was it- was it good?” charles asked, heat creeping into his voice. he had tried to hide it, but somehow, the jealousy festered even though he knew that it was him with the boy on his lap and not that crow’s.

“my love, i know i do not have to tell you that needn’t be jealous. i truly only have eyes for you, and i know you are aware of that,” edwin cooed and he used his power over charles like a weapon. he shifted his body so that he could cup charles’ face with one hand, pressing their lips together. “i adore you, charles. not him.”

he was ever too convincing and he knew it.

“yeah, i know,” charles said, trying for a bit less of a sopping puddle than what came out.

“good,” edwin smiled still, lips curling up beautifully. he pressed another kiss to the tip of charles’ nose this time before continuing. “i did not like it, or dislike it, really. i had liked him, at one point, but it was never- it could never possibly be in any way comparable with my affinity for you. it had taken me by surprise, of course, as that was decidedly not my intention in telling him that we should stop seeing each other, but i do not fault him. i know my wording is difficult to understand, on occasion. i’m not angry with him. not for that, at least. it still rather hurts that he betrayed us,” edwin said, his voice smaller toward the end.

“wait, you mean- you were trying to reject him and he kissed you?” charles asked, panic and anger rising and flowing into one another, his core fiery. not only had this birdbrain kissed his boyfriend, but he hadn’t even consented? had edwin not been firmly on his lap, he’d’ve been all the way back in port townsend now. he may not be good at mirror travel, but the pure, unbridled rage festering within him blinded him to that fact.

“yes, but, listen to me, my love,” edwin said, a small amount of panic in his voice. “he hadn’t done so on purpose. he thought i had meant that i was afraid of making it real. he didn’t simply kiss me because i was trying to reject him,” edwin tried to amend, but charles could hardly hear it over the blood rushing in his ears.

“bloody git. i’ll pluck all his feathers out,” charles said, now unable to hide his anger and frustration. his fingers tensed as he gripped edwin’s waist, fingers digging into his sides. edwin let out a small gasp.

“charles, he helped me uncover my feelings for you,” edwin said finally, a plea in his voice.

charles stopped at that, considering it. had it not been for that cunt, edwin would probably never have figured out his feelings for him? he didn’t forgive him, not by any means, but he did know just what to say to get edwin to laugh.

he let the tension seep out of his own body, forcing himself to relax. “oh. i’ll send him a fruit basket,” charles said plainly, masking any frustration that remained. he was still upset about it, but he was okay enough for him stop worrying about it while edwin was with him. he’d figure out the rest on his own time.

a laugh bubbled up, escaping edwin’s lips. “he’s still in crow form, i believe,” he said, turning to charles with a smile.

charles captured his lips in a chaste kiss, “then i’ll send him a seed basket,” he said against his lips. edwin wrapped his arms around his neck and charles couldn’t find it in himself to care any more at that moment. not with the loveliest boy in the world on his lap. kissing him. (and if the sense of possessiveness that edwin returned through their kiss added to a very different sort of heat in his core, that was no one’s business but charles’. and maybe edwin’s. definitely edwin’s.)

#ficlet #payneland #dead boy detectives #dbda #save dead boy detectives #renew dead boy detectives #revive dead boy detectives #save dbda #we will save this show #savedeadboydetectives #edwin payne #charles rowland #monty finch #jealous charles rowland #charles finds out about monty #he is NOT happy #edwin kisses it out of him

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rekino2114 · 7 hours ago

Text

Training with fem!gojo

A/n:Enjoy my poor attempt at writing a fight scene because I've been seeing way too many gojo vs sukuna edits(guess who's back in his jjk phase). Also, if this does well, I might make more fighting based posts for this au cause I really liked writing this so if you have any ideas for what y/n's cursed technique might be I'd love to hear them

(This is part of my "fem!gojo with a reader stronger than her" au here's parts 1 and 2)

"Allllright everyone are you all excited for today's super special lesson?"

"Well sensei......you haven't really told us what the lesson is about"

".......Oh really?"

"Yeah, you just dragged us here without explanation. This better be good. I skipped my training for this"

"Calm down maki, I'm sure it's gonna be fun"

"It will be, yuta, I can guarantee you that....well for me at least"

".........what?"

Gojo ignored megumi and walked away, turning back to her students after a while

"For today's lesson, we have a very special guest, the strongest sorcerer of today, not to mention my boyfriend:y/n l/n!"

She moved out of the way to reveal you, who just yawned in response while she was hyping you up

"Oh is l/n-sensei going to be teaching us?"

"Nope we're going to fight"

"...........what?"

"I thought that seeing a fight between the strongest sorcerers would be a great alternative lesson. You can learn new stuff and have fun, well I'll have fun"

"I only agreed to this because I was bored, fighting weak curses all the time gets repetitive quickly"

".....that's-"

"AWESOME! I can't wait to see it"

"Very well, I knew you'd be excited"

"Wait, wouldn't a fight be useless since we know y/n is stronger?"

"To make things fair, I'm not allowed to use any of my innate techniques, and satori can't use her strongest ones like her domain or purple"

"OK get away a bit, I wouldn't want you to get caught in the blast"

Before anyone had any chance to complain, all of the students backed away as you and your girlfriend got into position

"You ready with the barrier, ijichi?"

The man with glasses nodded and proceeded to make a large barrier to defend the students.

Seeing this, gojo smiled and started to take off her clothes, leaving her in a tight black shirt (which made you blush a bit as it hugged her muscles and curves perfectly). Meanwhile, you started stretching to get ready

"Be sure to not hold back, I won't even if you're my girlfriend"

Satori smirked at your words and took off her blindfold, throwing it away

"Don't worry, we both know......I never hold back"

You both got into position and immediately ran at each other at blinding speed. She started throwing punches that you dodged. You tried to do the same but were blocked by her infinity

"Tch"

You sprinted away from her and began thinking

'Just as I thought, her infinity is as annoying as always'

You made a fist with your hand as it started glowing with (your favorite color) colored cursed energy

'Luckily, I know just how to counter it'

She teleported towards you and punched you unsuccessfully. You swung your fist at her again, but this time, it started putting strain on the invisible barrier. However, gojo teleported away before it could connect fully

"W-what? Did you see that? He was about to touch gojo-sensei!"

"Did she deactivate her technique?"

"No, the barrier was still there. It was just being weakened, was that one of y/n's techniques?"

"But he said he wasn't going to use any"

"No.....he said he wasn't going to use any that were exclusively his"

"Domain amplification Eh? Can't say I'm surprised"

'Because he's not using any innate techniques, he can focus on using domain amplification all the time,at this rate he's going to go trough infinity soon it's better to deactivate it and focus on blue for now'

"Can we get sushi if I win?"

"Hm?"

"It's been a while since we went out and I want sushi, If I win can you pay?"

"What are you talking about? I always pay anyway"

You cracked a small smile as you got into a fighting position again

"Eh, true"

You raced at her, and you started trading blows at each other like before. Only now, you could freely touch her

'She stopped using her technique?.......good'

You focused all your energy in your punches and continued aiming at satori who couldn't keep up with your strength

"It's insane! the moment he figured out she stopped using infinithe immediately amped up the cursed energy in his fists by undoing the technique, he's so fast"

"And his strength is absurd, he's definitely winning in terms of hand to hand combat"

Just as yuji said that gojo tried to land a punch on your stomach but you blocked it with both hands, thinking she had a chance she raised her other fist but you ducked causing her to lose her balance, you grabbed her by the arm and raised her in the air before making her fall and pinning her to the ground

"You know, I'd actually quite enjoy this position if we weren't fighting"

"Shut up"

"Very well"

You saw her raise her fingers and move them to the right

"Blue"

you were flinged to your right by an invisible force. You put your hands on the ground to stop your motion, but before you could even move, you saw more blue energy form right where you landed

"Ugh!"

"Cursed technique amplification blue maximum output"

You were swept up in the blue sphere of energy that formed under you and that engulfed even the ground beneath you, after playing with it for a while satori threw her blue right at the edge of the barrier, damaging you.

'She's keeping me away because she knows I'm stronger in a close ranged fight, and because I can't use my techniques, I don't have any ranged attacks. she has a big advantage......well, that just means I'll have to get closer one way or another'

You wiped a bit of blood from your face and smirked

".......thank you, this is what I wanted to see, thank you for not holding back"

You suddenly punched the ground with great force,making the rubble and dust spread everywhere, making a veil

'Is he trying to conceal his position? Did he forget about the six eyes?'

Gojo used blue to move the dust and debris out of the way, and to everyone's surprise, you weren't there

"W-what? where did he go?"

'Wait I figured it out! Before, when I used blue to move the rubble away, he got moved too. He used my own technique to move out of my six eyes range........that means'

"Look!"

A mere second before yuta yelled, satori turned her head, but it was already too late as she saw you standing behind her with a fist full of cursed energy.

The honored one tried to activate her infinity to stop the punch, but that was futile as you immediately started using domain amplification when she did. You landed the most powerful punch you had thrown in a while on gojo's back, causing her to spit blood

"That punch.......even I can tell how strong it was"

"It probably would have killed a grade 2 curse, at least. and it wasn't even a black flash"

"Wait, it's still not over"

"Eh?"

The students looked in shock as you didn't even let the special grade sorcerer fly away from the punch because immediately after it connected, you grabbed her by the hair threw her to the ground punching her in the stomach when she landed.

"THIS IS THEIR TRAINING? HE LOOKS LIKE HE'S TRYING TO KILL HER!"

You stood over her body as you looked at her bloody face, mentally apologizing even knowing she definitely wouldn't mind

"We can finish this if you-"

"This is why I love you"

"Eh?"

"Every time I fight you, I feel this sensation....I have only felt with toji, you....you make me feel so understood.......so ecstatic!.....I'm so glad I find you"

You saw her smiling at you. It warmed your heart, and a small smile crept up your face

"You didn't figure it out, did you?"

You suddenly got worried as she kept talking

"Immediately after your first punch, I deactivated infinity so I could focus on expanding blue and red's outputs"

She raised her arm and did a finger gun gesture with it, aiming it at you

"And I haven't used red yet"

You tried running but a red light started to glow from her finger and engulf your vision

"Cursed technique reversal red maximum output"

Gojo fired off an incredibly large red, which hit you directly in the face and sent you flying away, but before you could hit anything solid, gojo teleported behind you and kicked you making you fall to the ground painfully

You stood breathing heavily for a moment, blood dripping from your face before you smiled back at her once again

"Hey, can we allow RCT since the fight is truly getting started?"

The moment you said that you saw gojo heal from the wounds you gave her which prompted you to do the same

"I don't see why not"

"Good........then can we also throw all the rules out of the window since it's getting serious"

Gojo's smile got even wider as she knew what you meant. She giggled a bit before holding her hand up

"I thought you'd never ask"

Everyone who was watching gasped as satori did the hand sign they were so familiar with. you held your hand(s) too in another gesture that everyone could deduce the use for

"Domain expansion: infi-/domain expansion:(doma-"

As you were about to expand your domains, you both saw the barrier being lifted as you grunted in confusion, gojo turned towards ijichi and saw that Yaga was now with him

"Hey what's this? We were just about to get to the good par-"

"What's this!? How about you look at what you did!"

You both turned to see the area of the courtyard you were fighting in completely destroyed

"You decide to have a fight with y/n without asking me in our courtyard!?"

"Well, it wasn't for nothing, you know? My students have learned a lot from watching us"

Gojo looked at them with an hopeful look that they didn't reciprocate as all of them shook their heads simultaneously

".............."

"S-sorry sensei I was also going to say, wasn't me watching this fight a bit risky since sukuna is inside me and could learn all of your techniques and counters by watching the fight?.......hehe....."

"..............."

".............."

You and your girlfriend seemingly ignored everything everyone said and started walking away unconcerned with your hands behind your head

"So which sushi restaurant you wanna go to?"

"Does that even count? We didn't finish the fight"

"Eh, who cares"

".......you were going to buy me sushi no matter what happened right?"

"Awwww, you know me so well"

She gave you a kiss on the cheek, and you blushed while the principal continued to yell at you two

"HEY WAIT, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?"

In response, gojo simply held your hand and waved at everyone there before teleporting both of you out of there

"..........are they serious?"

"How are those two the strongest?"

".......wait gojo forgot her clothes and blindfold........who wants to give them back to her?"

Everyone present sighed, knowing how much of a bother it was to deal with you and satori

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himluv · 2 days ago

Text

Dark, Complex, and Intriguing

Would anyone like some more Lucanis right before the holiday?

The cot creaked as Lucanis settled onto it with a sigh. He loosened his collar, unpinning his crow-head lapel chains, and leaned back to rest against the wall. He could not remember the last time he'd felt so relaxed.

Despite everything, he was alive and free. Treviso might be occupied by the Antaam, but it had not lost its spirit nor its charm. The markets were as vibrant as he remembered, though there were differences. He just couldn't tell if the city had changed, or if the difference lie with him.

Perhaps a little of both.

But Café Pietra had not changed. The atmosphere was impeccable, both intimate and lively, a bastion for coffee enthusiasts like himself. And the Andoral's Breath was just as good as he remembered.

He could have wept at the aroma alone. For a moment there, he almost had. It all hit him at once, in those split seconds before that first sip. He was alive. Treviso was still there. And he was about to drink his favorite coffee, one that mere days ago he had believed he would never taste again.

If he'd been alone, in private, he would have let the relieved tears fall. But Rook was there, quietly sipping her own cup of Andoral's Breath. Lucanis had been flattered that she took his suggestion, and even more pleased that she'd seemed to appreciate the brew almost as much as he did.

And then their conversation had spiraled into strange territory, about first kisses. He stood by his statement, first kisses were like honey and lavender cream. Things were always sweetest when they were new and so full of potential.

But Rook's answer was a good one. Each kiss is different. She'd sounded so sure, and so sure that he understood her meaning. That he shared that experience.

Nothing could be further from the truth. He barely knew anything about first kisses, and he only knew of kisses goodbye from the novels he'd read. Romance just wasn't a part of his life. Mainly because his life had never really been his.

So he'd changed the subject. And when asked about her coffee, she’d described it as dark, complex, and intriguing. Which could describe Andoral's Breath…

His eyes snapped open with realization. “Mierda, I'm an idiot.” Rook hadn't been talking about coffee at all. All that talk about kisses and then she says that?

Was Rook… flirting with him?

No, Spite said. Not possible. Why would Rook. Want. You?

A perfectly legitimate question to which Lucanis had no answer. But, he knew just who to ask.

The next morning, Lucanis went to visit Bellara. When he entered her quarters, Neve was there, the two of them chatting about some new scandal in the Tevinter papers.

“Oh, hey, Lucanis,” Bellara said.

He panicked. Talking to Bellara about this was stressful enough. He couldn't have this conversation in front of Neve, too.

“I'm interrupting,” he said. “I'll come back later.”

The women shared a look he could not interpret, but seemed to come to an understanding.

“I was just leaving,” Neve said, which was obviously a lie. “I'll talk to you later, Bel?”

Bellara smiled. “Sounds good, Neve!”

Lucanis listened to the detective go, and waited for the door to close to look at Bellara.

She frowned. “Is everything okay? You're acting strange. Is Spite acting up again?”

Not me. Not this time.

“No,” Lucanis said. “Spite is fine, for the moment.”

“Oh, well, good!”

Lucanis stood in the center of the room and tried to think of what to say. But everywhere he looked his reflection stared back from too many mirrors and he couldn’t think.

Glinting and golden. Trinkets for the tinkerer, Spite mused.

“Sooooo, what did you want to talk about?” Bellara perched on her workbench, swinging her feet like he and Illario used to do on the rooftops as boys. The familiar motion helped him settle.

“You and Rook are friends, right?��

She nodded. “Oh, sure. I mean, we've been Veil Jumpers together for a couple of years now. Although we didn't see each other much after she left to help Varric.”

“But, you are close? You… understand her?”

“Uh, yeah. I guess.” She laughed. “Lucanis, what is this about?”

He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “We went to meet Illario at Cafe Pietra last night—”

“—oh, yeah! She said she had a great time.”

“She…” he blinked at Bellara. “She did?”

Rook talked. About you? Spite bounced between Lucanis and Bellara, curious and agitated. Why?

She nodded, her earring jangling with the motion. “Mm-hm! She said the coffee was super good.”

“Of course it was,” he said. He crossed his arms over his chest. “What else did she say?”

“Um, nothing really. Just that she liked it and it seemed like you had a good time. She said it seemed good for you to go.”

“I did,” he said. “And it was.”

“That's great!” Bellara smiled at him. Then her brow furrowed. “Is that what you wanted to talk about?”

“Yes,” he said. “and, no.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Mierda, I feel so stupid.”

Stupid, Spite sang. Stupid stupid stupid!

“You're not stupid, Lucanis,” Bellara said. “What's going on?”

So, he explained it. His whole conversation with Rook, nearly beat for beat.

“I've thought about this too much,” he said, shaking his head. “I can't believe I thought she was flirting with me.”

Bellara laughed. “Oh, she was definitely flirting with you.”

WHAT?

“What?”

“Yeah,” she said. “Which for her is pretty smooth. I wonder if she was inspired by the coffee or…?” She stopped when she noticed his dumbstruck expression.

“Oh, is it unwanted? I can tell her to stop—”

He put a hand up to interrupt her. “No! No, thank you, Bellara. I can handle it.”

“Okay,” she said. She chewed on her lip, and a little crease in her brow gave him pause.

“What is it?”

“Just, if you're going to turn her down, maybe…” she winced. “Do it gently?”

He raised a brow at her.

“I don't want to get into it, but her last relationship ended pretty badly, so, you know…” Bellara blushed, as if she knew she shouldn't have said anything.

Her last relationship… how many had Rook had? How far behind was he? Not that it mattered, because he was not going to pursue this. He didn't do romance.

Still, he gave Bellara a soft smile. “I'll take that into consideration,” he said. “Thank you, Bellara.”

“Anytime,” she said.

He headed for the door, but paused as Bellara called after him.

“And, Lucanis?”

“Hmm?”

“Maybe try to get some sleep?”

He nodded. “Maybe,” he said, then stepped back out into the courtyard.

Back in his room, Lucanis lay on his cot and tried not to think. Bellara was right. The lack of sleep had left him frayed, which made him more likely to overthink and analyze every interaction.

Rook had flirted with him, and he'd been utterly clueless in the moment. Were there other times she'd said something he'd misunderstood? How oblivious was he?

But the biggest question he kept repeating was, so what?

Rook flirted with him. So what? She seemed kind and like she genuinely cared about his well-being. So what? She rescued him from the Ossuary. So what? She wasn't afraid of Spite. So what?

Did any of that actually matter? Lucanis wasn't even sure he wanted her affections. He had so much else to think about— Treviso, Caterina’s funeral, his vengeance against Zara, and, of course, Spite. And, he couldn't forget this contract. He had gods in need of killing.

It was too much. There wasn't room in his head to discern if he even liked Rook, let alone what to do if he did. And he was so, so tired.

Luckily, a year in the Ossuary had made Lucanis good at shutting down his thoughts and feelings. He just needed to breathe and be still. Spite, however, was less skilled.

The demon prowled the pantry, muttering just loud enough he was sure Lucanis wouldn't be able to ignore him.

Rook. Likes. You? He spat. Why? Rook is smart. Nice. Fun. Spite glared at Lucanis. Not like youuuu.

There was a pause as Spite waited for Lucanis to reply, but he said nothing. He didn't even look at the demon. He was trying to sleep.

Yesssssss. Sleep! Then I find Rook! Spite's grin always looked threatening, but this one was a little too unhinged. Ask what she sees in YOU.

Lucanis ignored the way his chest tightened at the thought of Spite controlling his body while he and Rook were alone. He could not let that happen.

“She's not here,” he said. “She left with Harding early this morning.”

Spite growled in frustration. We. Want. OUT!

This argument again. Until he found some way to separate them, he didn't think Spite could get anymore “out”. This was as good as the demon would get.

No. No no no. We. Made. A. DEAL.

With a sigh, Lucanis sat up and rested his head against the wall. “We'll go to Treviso later,” he said. “I need more spices anyway.”

Spite growled, but it was a low sound, one of resignation. Fine.

Lucanis smiled. A lifetime with Illario had prepared him well for dealing with this demon. When they threw fits for not getting what they wanted, you gave them something else they wanted. Something smaller, easier to manage.

Spite liked the markets almost as much as Lucanis did. It was a simple thing to offer a visit, something that would be pleasant for them both.

With the demon settled, a fresh wave of exhaustion washed over Lucanis, and he fell asleep there, propped against the wall.

In the dining hall, the door opened, the groan of its hinges pulling Lucanis from his sleep. He checked the candles, but they still burned high and bright. He hadn't slept long.

Footsteps drew closer, the muffled slap of bare feet on the stone floor. So, Rook was back.

He ignored the pleasant churn in his stomach. She wasn't coming to see him, she was probably just hungry.

But then his door opened and she peered inside. “Hey Lucanis,” she said. “ Got a minute?” Her face was bright from exertion, or perhaps too much sun reflected off water. Of course she and Harding would spend the morning outdoors. They were both too pale for so much unfiltered daylight. It made the freckles scattered across the bridge of Rook’s nose look like sprinkles of cinnamon on latte foam.

His stomach did another traitorous flip.

“Of course,” he said.

She smiled, ducked out of the room, then reappeared with a silver and purple tea set. “Um,” she said. “I, uh, got this. For you.”

He stared for a moment, eyes wide and mouth agape. “For me?”

She smiled. “Yeah. I know it's meant for tea, but I figured you could use it for coffee.” She shrugged. “You know, so you can keep it close?”

He took it from her and set it on the side table nearest his cot. First the wyvern-tooth dagger, and now this? If he'd had any doubts about her interest, they were gone now.

“Thank you, Rook,” he said. “That's very thoughtful.” Lucanis was genuinely touched by the gesture. It was a lovely set, one he recalled seeing in the market the night before. Had she gone back for it today?

“I'm glad you like it,” she said, her smile widening. This close, in the candlelight, Lucanis noticed the violet tinge to her blue-grey eyes. The color reminded him of the innermost petals of the crystal grace in Villa Dellamorte's gardens. Delicate and pale, and so soft to the touch.

“Well,” she said, breaking the silence. “I'll, uh, see you at dinner?”

Lucanis cleared his throat and looked back at the tea set. “Of course. I'll see you then.”

He didn't look at her as she left the room. He didn't want her to see the confusion he felt reflected in his eyes.

Trouble, Spite said.

And for once, he and Lucanis agreed. Because, as rare as it was for him, Lucanis couldn't deny the way his stomach flipped when he thought of her. Or how flustered he felt when they stood too close. How the air warmed when she walked in the room and how easy she made it to smile.

He groaned and rubbed his face with both hands. Maker help him, he was falling for Rook.

#lucanis dellamorte #veilguard spoilers #dav spoilers #datv spoilers #da4 spoilers #himluv's writing tag

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sofa-king-lame · 3 days ago

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Buck and Eddie roadtrip in Texas 👀

Ok so I actually started writing this one MONTHS ago and then abandoned it, but now (after 8x08) I feel like I could pick it back up again with better added context.

Basically they go on a road trip (like maybe they fly to Austin for an event or something and decide to hire a car and drive back through El Paso to get Chris or something). Buck isn't sleeping bc insomnia is a bitch and Eddie researches the shit out of different techniques he can use to help Buck.

Here's a snippet:

“Have you tried jacking off right before you go to sleep?” Eddie asks as Buck leaves the bathroom and Buck walks right into the arm chair.

“The fuck, Eddie,” he groans, bending over to rub his poor dead pinky toe.

“Sorry, just checking. It’s an obvious one though, so...” Eddie trails off and looks at Buck pointedly. Buck wants to die.

“Yes, Eddie, I’ve tried that. Didn’t help. Next tip, please.”

“Counting sheep,” Eddie suggests. He’s sitting cross-legged on the bed in just sweatpants and Buck still wants to die.

“Oh yeah that’s super fun until my brain can’t stop counting and suddenly it’s 4am and I’ve visualised seven fucking thousand sheep jump over a rickety wooden fence,” Buck snorts. He slumps into the armchair and rubs his eyes aggressively, listening to Eddie’s breathing. The room is (creepily) silent and Buck’s skin is prickling.

“Visualise moving all the furniture in your room,” Eddie reads off his phone.

“Great until hyper-fixation kicks in and I get up and actually start moving furniture. Remember three weeks ago when you came over for breakfast and I was passed out on my bed against the opposite wall?” Buck reminds Eddie pointedly. “I need new mental games.”

“Hmm. Well according to this person on Reddit you shouldn’t think of them as mental games because it’s not meant to be fun,” Eddie snorts.

“Yeah fuck that person. Going to sleep should be fun and if it helps me to think of mental exercises as games then that’s what I’ll do, random Reddit asshole,” Buck huffs. He’s way more annoyed than he should be about this but Eddie doesn’t say anything, just hums in agreement. Buck appreciates Eddie rolling with his spiralling and not telling him to ‘just sit the fuck down and relax’ like Tommy used to. Buck wants to die a little less now, but not by much.

“Have you tried counting backwards?” Eddie asks, tilting his head to the left a little. The gel he’d put in his hair in the morning has lost its hold and his hair flops to the side, falling over his forehead.

“Ah see that one I’ve actually had a little success with.” Buck stands up from the armchair – his pinky toe has miraculously not fallen off and he can, in fact, walk. He sits down opposite Eddie, close enough that their knees are almost touching (because it’s only a double bed, not because Buck just wants an excuse to be close to Eddie, nope).

“But not so much recently?”

“I count backwards by threes starting at nine hundred and ninety-nine,” Buck starts, and absolutely does not shift slightly so that his and Eddie’s knees are actually touching.

“Oddly specific, do explain,” Eddie muses. He still looks sleepy, despite his four-hour nap in the car. Buck wants to hold his stupid hand.

“Doing it that way hits every triple digit – eight eighty-eight, seven seventy-seven, blah blah blah,” Buck trails off, waving his hand dismissively. “Which is satisfying but is also a pattern that my brain latches on to and after a few nights it’s not engaging enough to keep my attention and I start tuning out the counting and get distracted by other things.”

“That - I mean I can’t relate, I don’t know what that’s like but it sounds really fucking frustrating. I’m sorry,” Eddie murmurs warmly, placing a calloused hand on Buck’s knee and yep, Buck is going to die tonight.

I've written 5.3k words of this one lol. I've just got so many WIPs/fics I want to start!

#claire answers #911 #911 fic #buddie fic #eddie diaz #evan buckley

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blightowl · 2 days ago

Text

Oh thank goodness I'm turning the question hose on full blast get ready

I'm once again putting under the cut because why say in a few words what I can blabber in many!

Cretaceous Kate might be my favorite combination of words ever. I immediately love her. I know trilobites are nowhere near the cretaceous period but I thought Katherine might appreciate my trilo-angle

How does Kate travel back in time? Does she have any particular bird friends? Do any prehistoric avian birds live with her in the 19th century? (If so, do they have contemporary bird costumes in case of unexpected visitors? Or perhaps can the ancient bird friends hold really still and pretend to be models?)

What is Kate's go-to lunch food? What does she do if her quill breaks while she's out sketching? Is her notebook loose leaf - and if so have her note pages ever gone exploding everywhere - or is it like a journal? Did it start out dummy thicc or has she added c's paper over time?

(May I call her Kate? Or does she prefer Katherine? I like that she spells Katherine with a K. I'm watching Anne of Green Gables (again) and as Anne Shirley says, Katherine with a K is so much more alluring.)

What is Kate's favorite bird of prey? How does she feel about spiders? Has she ever seen a live penguin?

Pick one of your ocs. (It can still be Katherine "Cretaceous Kate" Fleet :) ) That oc makes a sandwich. What do they make?

> Maybe one of your ocs does not know what sandwiches are, so they make their best guess. Maybe one of your ocs is like "I love sandwiches but how?? make????" because they've always had their food made for them. Sandwich fun >:3{

Toli Toli ravioli. I'm not sure what species of snake he is yet. I've been looking around Wikipedia now and then at different snake species, but it's not been a great way to narrow it down because I start out with focus but the hyperlinks are so shiny and blue and next thing I know I'm learning about agglutination.

But the fact that you introduced Katherine Fleet in return is like full on serendipity because one of the birds I think of for him is Apsaravis ukhaana! Another bird is the Western Parotia bird-of-paradise! The way they create a whole umbrella collar of feathers is exactly what Toli would do. Bobbing from side to side with his neck feathers fanned out. Looking like a big ol satellite dish snake goofus.

I don't think Toli is venomous, but he's a relatively new oc so I have much more to discover yet! I keep envisioning him as more of a constrictor so when he morphs back into a snake from a quarterstaff (re: being thrown at bad guy), bad guy suddenly has to deal with 300+ lbs of big muscly feather rope coiling around them (not to mention a good solid bite from one end).

Toli is a bit of a troll so when he's hanging out on Morwenna's body, he loves to mess with people. When one of Morwenna's friends noticed for the first time her tattoo moving, they tried to poke at him. So he turned off her skin and poked back.

As a tattoo, he's maybe three feet long, and about three to four inches wide. When he's out and about, he's beeg. Still haven't figured out how big, but big enough to be a menace to any mid-sized sedan.

That doesn't mean he wouldn't love chin scritchies. He would jump out of a plane for chin scritches. And that says a lot because first he'd have to learn how to jump. He would do big snuggles. All the scritchies plz

Okay uh this reply is getting really long. Speed round.

He and Wenna work together well now, but they've been together a long time. At first they butted heads and sucked eggs. Now they goo. He can talk to other snakes but he's so big and feathered (is bird??? but is snek???? what is???) that other snakes generally are too scared. Fun fact: when he's in tattoo mode, Morwenna can talk to snakes.

I'm in the mood to introspect, does anyone wanna play OC telephone? Send me a fact about one of your ocs, and then ask a question about one of mine (can be a specific chatacter if you know any or generic if you don't) then I'll answer and add a follow up question, and we see how long we can keep the thread going!! Someone please play w me I'm boredddd.

#oc game #oc ask game #oc anatoli #oc anatoli 'toli'#oc morwenna #reply #i am just so good at brevity you have no idea #I wanna hear more about all your ocs!!!!!#acornered #great url too btw

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bobbinfire · 2 days ago

Text

Wicked/Transformers One Crossover

Okay Okay Okay…

I finally got to watch Wicked (pt 1) recently. And I do see where people on a few random posts have made crossover opportunities between Wicked and Transformers One, obviously placing D-16 as Elphaba and Orion Pax as Glinda. But here me out…what if we have a very different type of casting? To best explain, let me first-

Set the stage….

(*waves hands dramatically to cue magical transition*)

We start with D-16. All things considered, his life is perfect. Really. He always does everything right, he is at the top of the charts in anything he competes in, and now to solidify that reality D-16 will be attending Shiz, the top school in all of CybertrOz. He barely steps a foot into the school and is already the most popular mech around. Nothing can ever go wrong. Well, until he is startled by Orion Pax. Pax has a… unwelcome disfigurement (I will figure out that later) that sets him apart from the others. It is because of that, and totally not his shimmering blue crystal optics, D-16 finds he can’t stop looking at him. Luckily for D-16, Orion states he is not attending and is only here for his brother, so he won’t have to worry about ever seeing him again. Later, D-16 tries to approach Alpha Trion, the top professor and head of the sorcery department (conveniently what D-16 is studying). He ignores D-16 inquiries about potentially hosting a class for it this semester, even after bringing back up his paper on t-cogs and their transformative purposes for sorcery. But he is D-16, so he will just have to work hard like always and he will get into that class in no time. Then out of nowhere he notices a well meaning professor over-handling a handicapped bot named B-127 (either he can’t walk or can’t talk haven’t decided). Objects in the room fly because Orion Pax, who as it turns out is the older brother, freaks out. Alpha Trion calms the students down by claiming it was a stunt he performed on his own, but D-16 knows it was that increasingly more mysterious Pax. He tries to approach Alpha Trion about it, only to somehow accidentally volunteer to room with Pax?! For the first time in his life he is not listened to and he doesn't get his way. And it’s all Orion Pax’s fault. Oh and to top it off he is so talented with magic he’s now getting PRIVATE lessons from Alpha Trion. But D-16 will rise above it. He is D-16, so everything will be perfect in the end. Within the first few moments of rooming together though, both of them express their deepest undying feelings for each other: loathing. The two proceed to spend the next few weeks purposely getting on each other's nerves as much as possible. The rest of the student body seems to back D-16 up too. Why wouldn’t they? They are obviously his friends. Orion Pax is unbothered by it, and while he makes it clear how much he hates him, there is the smallest twinkle in his optics each time he pulls a stunt. And D-16 hates to admit it, but he gets the smallest joy from their squabble as well. Only the absolute minimum joy, of course. One day after a class with Professor Ravage (not D-16’s favorite professor, I mean really how hard is it to pronounce his name? It is a D and then 16. Not hard at all) D-16 begins to see Orion Pax in a new light after someone rudely vandalizes Professor Ravage’s board saying “beastformers should be seen and not heard”. Pax stays behind after class is dismissed and helps clean up. While it is not D-16’s job to help, he does feel a stab at his spark from the sadness of the situation.

Oh well time to focus on other things because a royal is coming to attend classes at shiz! Princess Elita-One, a strong willed and goal oriented dreamer. While she can be a little intense and can list off all the codes of conduct at the drop of a hat, she knows how to really enjoy the moment (especially when it revolves around her). She is perfect, D-16 is perfect, so why not make the perfect situationship out of a perfectly timed impromptu dance party. As D-16 gets ready, his friends find an ugly old mask from his relatives that is meant for regal government parties but more looks like a battle mask that has gone through war. They claim it’s so ugly that there is only one bot who could wear it, and that is how D-16 finds himself giving it to Orion Pax claiming it will go with what he wears. He feels guilty about it but tries to dance away his feelings as the party begins. During the time of his life dancing with Elita-One, Alpha Trion approaches his saying he has been accepted into his class and hands over his training T-cog. A t-cog! An object that allows your body to transform and perform great visual and magical feats. Only the top ranking officials and the Prime himself have them. As D-16 tries it on and watches his future change before him both metaphorically and physically, he asks why now? Alpha Trion says he is doing it against his better judgment, but only because Orion Pax said he would quit otherwise. D-16 is about to ask why he would do that, only to realize not only did Orion see the mask as a kind gesture, but you ended up setting up B-127 with another bot for the dance tonight. Just then Orion Pax walks in, looking very unique with his worn mask covering his mouth. Realizing all too late that it was a prank, he begins this weird dance that has everyone staring. Elita points out how well he is reacting and that it’s almost like he doesn’t care. But D-16 knows that underneath that mask is all the hidden sadness that can be seen growing in Orion’s eyes. D-16 suddenly joins the dance, trying to make amends by damaging his own reputation. Instead the dance catches on and both rise in popularity.

D-16 and Orion are now the best of friends and decide to have each other's backs no matter what. Orion ends up sharing a secret with D-16 about how he feels responsible for B-127 disability, all because their father didn’t want Bee to be born looking like Orion. D-16 reassures him and decides to help Orion by making him more popular. All you have to do is be as cool looking and awesome as Megatronus Prime. Orion is put off at first, but nonetheless their friendship grows. And it feels nice, the word “friends” rolling off of D-16’s glossa. He is popular so he has a ton of friends but…this one…feels genuine. Perhaps more. An odd thing he notices though is Elita-One and Orion Pax acting odd around each other after a particularly sad day of class. Professor Ravage was removed from class and the new professor decided to bring in a baby Dinobot in a cage. He didn’t remember falling asleep, but when D-16 came to Orion, Elita, and the baby Dinobot were gone. The two came back later and that is when they started acting weird.

It isn’t long before D-16 focuses on other things because Orion is going to visit the Prime in the Golden City! The entire class is there to wave goodbye, including Elita who shares another awkward moment with Pax. Clearly it is in regards to professor Ravage’s dismissal, so D tries to make a connection with them by changing his name, since Ravage couldn’t pronounce D-16 right, to Megatron (named after Megatronus Prime himself). His peers cheer his selfless act, but D-16 doesn’t feel better by it, and Elita and Orion seem still in their own little moment. That moment soon ends and Orion is off on the train to the Golden City. Then suddenly he is calling for D- Megatron to join him. Megatron is unsure whether he leapt or was dragged on by Orion but soon they are off to meet the Prime.

Once there Megatron and Orion travel and see the sights. They party, tour, and Orion gets a special Megatronus sticker for Megatron. They even get a little convenient lore drop that explains how there once were great Primes that ruled over CybertrOz, then they passed away leaving the secrets of the all powerful Matrix to be left alone. Nobody was worthy to control it, until the day the Prime appeared. The two mull over that as they make their way to the Prime. The Prime himself is quite the show off. Sentinel Prime talks about his plans for the future of CybertrOz and that one day Orion will be a part of it, he just has to prove his worth. The next few moments flash by in a blur. Alpha Trion appears and leads the way to where they store the Matrix. The Matrix responds to Orion’s presence. But…something goes wrong. An unplanned outcome of a spell, a plan to use spies to capture the remaining talking beastformers, Orion running, Megatron running after Orion, guards chasing them. More chaos, more ruin, and then…and then, they are alone. Megatron scolds Orion for not filling the rules. What is happening to beastformers, while it does hurt Megatron’s spark, doesn’t affect them and therefore he can move past it. But Orion can’t and Megatron can see that. Orion brings an old jet pack back to life and gives Megatron the offer to leave with him. Megatron wants to…but he can’t. He can’t throw everything he’s worked for just for Orion. He notices Orion trembling so he searches for something to provide warmth. They’re in this old dusty tower though so there isn’t even a tarp to throw on the poor bot’s back. The only thing of warmth and worth is Megatron’s temporary t-cog. So he gives it to Orion, assuring him of his choice and wishing him well. Just then the guards break in and grab Megatron. Orion shouts to focus their attention on him before leaping out a window and falling towards an opening that leads to the depths of CybertrOz’s core. Right as he passes the barrier his jetpack launches him to the sky and he outflies several of the guards. He declares that nobody will bring him down before flying towards the vastness of the unknown surface singing like an Idina Menzel wannabe, everyone declaring he is wicked.

And that is only Act 1.

Hope you enjoyed my rambles. Originally I was gonna do a simple explanation and then I got too into it. I apologize for the horrid grammar.

(I have yet to see anything in regards to Act 2 and I would like to see Wicked Pt 2 as spoiler free as possible)

#funny #writing #dumb writing from work #wicked #wicked the movie #wicked 2024 #wicked musical #transformers one #tf one #elphaba thropp #glinda upland #orion pax #d 16 #I spent way to long on this stupid story seed #What would you even name this crossover?#Transicked? Wicked One? Till all are wicked?#transformers #maccadams

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more-than-tender-curiosity · 3 days ago

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I’m really curious as to your opinions on each of the Gatsby films. What do you think they did right/wrong? What do you like/dislike about casting choices? If you could make your ideal Gatsby movie rendition would you take any inspo from the existing movies?

(I would add the broadway musical into that list just for the heck of it but we all know that was just funky music loosely wrapped in Gatsby paper)

Oh good heavens...

Okay. So. I'll just talk about them in order of release. And again these are my OPINIONS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT I WAS ASKED FOR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO YELLING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WILL CRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SO many spoilers ahead. You have been warned.

1926

Obviously this film is lost, but we have the trailer, photos, and Fitz's own reaction to it, which was to say he and Zelda left halfway through. It's not even based off the book, either, but based off a play based off the book, so one can imagine that given the filmmaking style of the time and its disconnect from the source material, it likely wasn't the most accurate adaptation.

Accuracy isn't everything in terms of what makes an adaptation 'good'—it's definitely a factor, though, along with entertainment value, justification for any alteration to the story, attention to detail, Genuine Caring For The Source Material, acting, casting, etc...all of these go into consideration, at least for me.

The casting seems alright for this version. Daisy has dark hair. Nick's taller than Jay and visibly, uhhhhhhhhh...well, like...have you ever heard of 'gay face'? But it ends about there, as Tom looks like he's 50, Jordan is...just not right, and as is often the case, Wilson is somehow beyond 'faintly handsome'? Do they just not have enough middies running around in Hollywood?

The costumes are obviously pretty accurate, though very clearly 1926 trying to do 1922. The skirts are. UP there. And I get that jay's shirts are monogrammed but a hand-sized monogram on each jacket? What? Did they think audiences would lose track of which brunette man was which?

Here's a photo. God nick is such a cunt look at him

I can't accurately give the whole film a rating but what I know of it gives it a 6.5/10. Bonus points to jay for pushing the no white shoes after labor day rule up to the very brink.

1949

...listen.

In terms of accuracy to the book, this is not the best. It's just not. It's a star vehicle for Alan Ladd who, at the time, was popping off hardcore in the film noir market, so they fiddle faddled with the tone a bit and shot it in black and white despite having access to color, amped up the crime (jay smokes some bitches in the first five minutes??? takes a hefty swing at a man at a party????) and then said uhhhhh what book are we adapting again?

East Egg and West Egg are scrambled, which goes against the whole 'east coast/old money' vs 'westerners/new money' thing. Nick and Jordan are married in the beginning before flashing back. Nick's just not hypocritical enough in this one, either, which is bothersome, because that's the whole point of his character in the novel—that he can't see his own faults for the more glaring faults of others.

They press fast forward a lot. Like there's no drive to new york or meyer lunch—nick and jay just snuggle in his boat watching the green light and jay tries to lie to nick and nick catches him immediately and jays like AH. YA GOT ME. HA HA. ?????????

if it weren't for alan ladd I would not watch this movie. Don't get me wrong, I love Macdonald Carey as Nick, but I think playing across from anyone else, this would be entirely forgettable and borderline unwatchable.

Alan Ladd. Alan Ladd. Where do I begin with Alan Motherfucking Ladd. This man is Jay Gatsby personified. I know that's controversial because 2013 has brainwashed people into thinking jay gatsby is over six feet tall, but there is something so distinctly perfect about casting a malnourished 5'7 midwestern blonde with such intense parental issues that he never recovered from the sickness that is an impoverished American childhood as jay gatsby. Alan Ladd was underestimated, spat on, put down from day fucking one. Every single time he got ahead in life he was cut down at the knees until finally, finally he found validation and celebrity in playing these soft-spoken, angel-faced killers onsreen. Only it wasn't enough. It was never enough. It could never fill that void and he could never get ahead of himself. You want to tell me that doesn't mirror the fuck out of Jay's life? You want to tell me there was a man in Hollywood at the time who could so deeply understand this character, even through the bullshit rewrites to try and mold the story into something it wasn't? There are even accounts of him taking reporters to his bedroom to show them his closet, saying 'not bad for an okie boy'. That's Jay. That's Jay in pure essence. Never having enough, and so excited to show what he had. Literally look into his past at all and you will mourn his lack of control over the direction the film took, because I know damn good and well if he had been more than just everybody's favorite film noir star at the time and a more respected name, he could have really pushed and pulled to peel back the story and pull better performances from the rest of the cast as a result.

Bonus points for having a really fucking weird Dan Cody and Ella Kaye. Both were distinctly, visibly, vocally predatory toward Jay and it's like the directors actually looked into prior drafts, even if I know damn good and well they didn't. I don't even know if they read the damn book.

Costumes were fine. I wish wish wish wish it had just been in color (THEY COULD HAVE DONE IT.) so that we could see if jay got his pink suit. I swear to god the sight of alan ladd in a pink suit would actually kill me.

I'll give this one a 7/10 overall, points dinging for accuracy to the novel and pacing and some really weird choices, like having jay come from the rainbow division in the war (????) to making nick like...offer to spank jordan. i don member THAT from the book. Most of these points come from Alan Ladd.

Uh. Here's myrtle getting hit by the car

1974

oh boy.

Where to begin? The film is a fucking mess. It's a goddamn motherfucking mess and I can only watch it if I cut Jay and Daisy out of it entirely, which is a shame, because I love both of their characters (for different reasons) but. oh my GOD.

So they got truman capote to write the screenplay at first. unfortunately he made nick and jay skinny dip, and jordan was a vindictive lesbian, and it was 1974 so they weren't about that noise at ALL. There's other stuff in that script too and it's honestly...not a great script to begin with, but that meant they had to REWRITE THE ENTIRE THING WITH JUST WEEKS TO GO BEFORE PRODUCTION. THEY ASKED FRANCIS FORD COPPOLA (THE GODFATHER.) TO WRITE IT AND HE DID IT IN THREE WEEKS IN A HOTEL ROOM, HAVING BEEN UNFAMILIAR WITH THE BOOK, THEN CLAIMED THEY DIDN'T EVEN USE HIS SCRIPT AFTER ALL??? HUH? HUH WHUH?

you can tell. oh boy you can tell. 'jay' and 'daisy' sit around talking in silent rooms for several minutes at a time, just...expositioning all over the place. it's...astonishing.

that's another thing. i...am aware mia farrow is a beloved actress and she did wonderful things onscreen in other films but she is totally and completely unwatchable as daisy. if I knew no other adaptation, she would make me hate daisy with a blind fucking rage. it's not even that she's a bad actress in this—she just does not fit the role even a LITTLE. she's shrill and loud and like...i don't know if she's on coke or what (I mean it's the 70s.) but she just whines and flails her way through the film in an entirely undaisy sort of way. like where is this girl with the sad, lovely face and the voice that's a deathless song? her voice isn't full of money in this, it's counterfeit. she owes me a debt for making me have to listen to her. she only got the job because her name was big at the time and she just asked for it and got it, no audition, no screen test, no nothing. i wish they would have switched lois chiles into daisy's role rather than have her playing jordan, because she was just a much better match for the character.

1974 has one of my favorite toms at least. I've said it before but he's got that sort of frustrated, unsatisfied disinterest, a sort of distraction about him that really lends well to the whole notion of forever chasing down his college days and all that.

WEIRD fuckin chester mckee in this one, but points for being the first fuckin film to show my man onscreen! there's even an elevator scene in this one but it's not between nick and chester, unfortunately. though there is immense sexual tension regardless.

SPEAKING OF NICK! SAM WATERSTON MY BELOVED!!!!

Yet again another flawless casting along the lines of Alan Ladd as Jay. He's such a bitch. I don't think Nick is the same if he's not a cynical gay little cunt some of the time and despite being apparently one of the nicest people in Hollywood, sam just GETS IT. HERE is someone who floats above reproach like his shit don't stink. HERE is someone who will throw the blame on just about anyone but himself—and has to let jay into that same bubble of protection. HERE is someone who knows he's useless but is too afraid to admit it to himself because he's turning 30 and is about to face a crisis of mortality. he's judgemental and critical and somehow pulls off the sort of mind-altering gay panic nick very explicitly experiences around jay every 5 seconds in prior drafts of the book. i wish you all understood how hot nick thinks gatsby is. i wish you all knew what I know. sam waterston knows. and he gets it. he also just looks like nick. like crooked teeth and awkward nose and all. that's nick. i wanna kick him in the shins.

i gotta talk about jay's house in this one. it's bad. why does he live in a greek temple. like. nick describes jay's house in the book. he does. he's a faux provincial palace. almost a fairytale castle. that's on purpose. why. is he living in a marble box. is it supposed to be a tomb. are you making death jokes. fuck you Robert Redford

speaking of Robert Redford. did anyone let him know who he was playing in the movie or did you just hand him a script and tell him to start wherever. I get that jay isn't known for his brains but I have never seen a more confused lead in a film does he even know the camera is rolling or does he do that naturally

costuming is unmemorable and inoffensive except

YOU CALL THAT PINK? PINK?

6/10. Saved by Sam Waterston. Rendered unwatchable by Mia Farrow.

2000

OH BROTHER THIS GUY STINKS

No seriously who let the BBC do this. 5 million dollar budget and they used 4.9 of it on jordan's fuck ass bob.

I don't even know where to begin. I guess I should start at the beginning. The movie opens to Jay dead in the pool, which is the best part of the movie because he's dead.

Nothing about this film is good. I...I hate to say that because I try to find a little good in every adaptation but holy CHRIST. I have only seen this one in parts because I physically cannot sit and watch the whole thing at once.

Nick is played by Paris from Romeo+Juliet. He's not good. Even the one scene I kind of sort of like, at the end where he burns all of jay's papers(?????) is kind of undercut because HE STILL WRITES THE BOOK?? THE EXPOSE??? WHY BOTHER??? HE'S ALREADY DEAD????

I don't remember tom in this. I barely remember Jordan, but she's really, really into Nick and it's kind of upsetting to watch from a visceral standpoint. It's very uncanny valley. That's a NotJordan. the real jordan would never.

it gets worse.

Whoever thought they should cast whatever his name is as Jay—death. death to all of them. That is the most smarmy, leering, dickweed of a dude I have ever had the displeasure of existing near. It's like if the jay equivalent of people who make hating daisy their entire personality got to design jay's characterization for this film. There are no good parts to him. It's just like every single person who's boiled him down to jUsT a CrEePy StAlKeR OWO got to write a film. i would even be down for that point of view if it was well-acted and well written but UNFORTUNATELY, THE ACTING BUDGET WENT TO JORDAN'S WIG,

I can't even remember. 1974 and 2000 blend together for me.

The costuming is so bad but like. whatever. i thought I could live with it.

until.

oh dear god why does daisy have 2007 hollister hair it's 1917

you get more than one photo this time because I know most people haven't seen this film

tell me this didn't come off a CW vampire show in 2011

IS THAT RENESMEE?

SMILEDOG IS THAT YOU?

THE HAIR?

and of course, jordan's 4.9million dollar fuckass bob

Like i get it. period dramas are hard. but good fucking god. im so uncomfortable looking at every single person in this film

BONUS:

1/10 only because i get to watch NotJay die twice

i need a breather

...

2013

okay

In terms of direct, faithful adaptation, I think this one is the best. Like they didn't technically skimp on anything super major, didn't really try to put scenes in a blender. There's clearly, like. a whole script.

I'm already a Baz Luhrmann fan. I have been since the 7th grade when I saw this little movie called—

Romeo + Juliet. No, not tgg. I saw that next, though, and was obsessed. Love. Love!

I love when you can tell an adaptation is made by someone who actually cares about adapting the source material. Very key words there. Adapting. Source Material. Cares About. Because all of these other adaptations are clearly just looking to use a classic novel to make a movie but bazco clearly wanted to Adapt The Great Gatsby For Modern (At the time) Audiences.

I like a lot of the decisions made there. Casting an Indian actor as Meyer Wolfshiem—even if it goes against the explicit description of him in the book as this small beady eyed little weirdo, I think it was a better call to give a lesser-known (to American audiences) poc actor a role rather than continue digging the antisemitic hole Fitzgerald decided to dig himself for some reason.

The music too. It gets so much flack but I totally get what Baz was going for and it was honestly a little ahead of its time in 2013. To take a very White story (I could talk about the implications of Jay being mixed/black/otherwise poc all day) and apply our generation's equivalent of jazz ("oversexualized black people music") to forcing modern white audiences to face the fact that we absolutely will still sit here and find any reason to try and justify the erasure of black influence on the culture of America at any given point—it's chef's kiss. Shut the fuck up about it. I'm tired of hearing shit about the music being anachronistic. Yes, I would have loved to hear more period-accurate rejuvenated jazz covers in there. NO it would not be swing because hey bitch that too is anachronistic, it wasn't around in 1922. You can't have it both ways. Baz had a point to make and he teamed up with JAY Z to make it and yet again a bunch of white nerds got mad that they had to confront their internalized racism.

Yes, it is that deep. Everything is. To pretend it isn't is cowardice.

Anyway! The CGI pisses me off. It always will. If it's marvel or mordor I really don't give a damn, with that kind of budget you can afford some practical effects and save the CGI for moments where it can ACCENTUATE the practical effects to heighten the sense of mystification Nick undoubtedly felt upon entering this world. There's just no excuse for a lot of their effects and it's very disappointing to think of them trying to act in all these hollow blue environments.

Finally, FINALLY there's some depth to nick and jay's interactions. There's been this sort of disconnect in every other adaptation thus far and I'll give credit to Tobey Maguire and Leo DiCaprio for being friends for six thousand years before taking these roles, because the chemistry is Something Else.

that being said. tobey maguire was a really weird choice for nick carraway. I...don't really see it. I've called it Gooberfication before, as if they're sort of dumbing down his character and making him more palatable for the audience. I don't think it was an acting choice on Tobey's part but a choice made by the filmmakers themselves. There's no point in the book where Nick tries to make himself out as this friendly aw shucks ah geez scuse me ass goober, even when he's trying to claim he's like this unjudgemental dude. He lets you know outright that he'll do just about anything to get out of a conversation. He lies about his relationships, breaks up with people on a whim, is cynical and critical and has a barb to his tongue EVEN AROUND JAY (like when he considers asking to see Jay's rubies, knowing damn well he doesn't have any fuckin rubies.) And that's BEFORE jay dies. He's even worse after that, and I do appreciate the framing device of having Nick write this book while in recovery from...That Event.

which brings me to Baz Luhrmann Ships Natsby, Fuck You. He does. Oh my god. How are they queerer here than in actual fics I've written? Literal fireworks when they meet??? Nick being the one to call jay and hear the gunfire. that is his HUSBAND. "he did not know it (his dream) was already behind him" AS NICK STANDS BEHIND AN IMAGINED VERSION OF JAY. NICK HAVING TO PUT HIMSELF AWAY IN A MENTAL HOSPITAL AFTER GRIEVING HIM FOR YEARS???? BECOMING AN ALCOHOLIC INSOMNIAC WITH DEPRESSION, ANXIETY, AND FITS OF ANGER?????????????? BECAUSE HIS NEIGHBOR HE KNEW FOR THREE MONTHS DIED???????????????????????????? H. HELLO?

GOD.

Anyway. Speaking of their meeting, the song used in the background is Rhapsody in Blue by George Gershwin, which was professed by Fitz to have been THEE gatsby song, so that's a very nice touch. All the newspapers about Jay are written by prior Fitz characters. Even the clippings in Jay's scrapbooks attempt to add realism to the world but they...don't make sense entirely but that's fine. I know the filmmakers read at least Trimalchio but I don't know if they read the Princeton Draft. Either way, good on them.

Will never forgive this film for twinkifying Nick Carraway. Will never forgive it for planting the seed of top jay/bottom nick in the minds of the youth. I completely blame this movie for it. I don't think Jay was even topping Daisy at this point. He couldn't top a sundae. Even if he's played by Leonardo DiCaprio.

SPEAKING OF DAISY!!!!! I think Carey Mulligan did a damn good job at playing her accurately and as as much of a person as she could while still having the film's pov limited to Nick. Carey's a very good actor and she pretty clearly did her research to play Daisy, and was just very well cast. Now if the costume designers had simply allowed her to keep her natural hair color. Same with Jordan/Elizabeth Debicki. Daisy's brunette. Jordan's blonde. It's right there in the book in several places. I've talked about it forever. WHY would you go to the effort to change your actors' appearances when they were already accurate? Why? Why? Are you incapable of imagining a desirable woman who isn't blonde?

that being said, all jordan bakers should be 6'3. Elizabeth debicki, no notes.

tom's fine in this one. myrtle and George are too. chester actually gets to like. appear onscreen and try to get nick into the bedroom but UGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH of COURSE there's no elevator scene because nothing is ever fair or right or good. that's not MY chester (iykyk) but it is certainly A chester which is better than NO chester.

I would like to say that the Plaza scene in this film is the best of any of them. I believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that Jay was at a point in his health that if Wilson hadn't killed him, a heart attack would, and that's precisely the behavior exhibited in 2013's plaza scene. This is a man who has been twisting himself up into a tighter and tighter ball his entire life and has now just fucking sprung open because he's realized this is it, this is the end, everything I have done has been entirely pointless and I'm about the lose the one last fucking thing I have to live for and it's my fault because everything has been since the day I was born. Like I won't say it's 'mask off' and this would have been some sort of normal explosive behavior for him if he did end up getting to 'keep' daisy (because obviously shes An Object,,,,, right,,,,) but this...was coming regardless of whether tom dragged it out of him or not. it really exhibits just how much was going on behind the scenes that not even nick was privy to. just imagine how much pressure wolfshiem put on him in the end to keep going, keep working, as if his life isn't on the cusp of completely turning upside down.

(putting a space here because tumblr got mad about how much I wrote.)

that's one tiny little thing I absolutely adore about 2013. it's a blink and you'll miss it moment where meyer AND GOONS are in jay's office and he asks jay what's going on. It's so simple but so fucking menacing. it's so subtle. the implication that meyer has jay in a chokehold and the more time he spends with daisy, the more meyer gets pissed, and the more meyer gets pissed, the more likely he'll cut jay out of the business entirely, and jay's holding on to this tiny little string of assurance that he can manage it all for daisy and it's worth it for daisy and he's still the pretty face for the front of the company and meyer NEEDS him for that and if meyer needs him then it'll be okay, he can balance daisy and the business it'll be FINE—until it isn't, obviously. he originally turned daisy down when she suggested running away because all his money is tied up with meyer and if he runs, either meyer will track him down and kill him because he knows too much or he has to start over again. of course eventually he comes around to realize that running is their only option but it's too late and he knows that by the time he blows up at the plaza. he hit his breaking point and ruined everything. and leonardo DiCaprio is the only one who I think really captured just how fucking wound up jay really was.

I'm not talking about the broadway musical anymore

but if i were to make my own gatsby film...

I've never actually thought about it enough to pin down a cast. I have, however, considered that if for whatever reason I was given the opportunity to make any sort of adaptation of it, I'd probably have a black Jay regardless, and I think Ncuti Gatwa would be a really fun choice. Look at him. Imagine you're drunk and gay and this is across the table. Nick I get it.

I would try to keep in line with the book as best I could, though, because it's important to me. I live and breathe the history of this novel and I can see all the lives woven into each minute detail and I would hate to not do it justice.

...

Otherwise...I do spend hours a day daydreaming about turning Gatsby into a limited series a la Anne with an E, albeit more adult in nature due to the subject matter. But I can see it in my head so clearly. I wish wish wish I could. Maybe one day. If only.

#the great gatsby

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