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omgreally · 4 years ago

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The Apprentice Read on AO3

Pairing: Din Djarin/F!Reader Rating: E for Explicit, Of Course Wordcount: 5k+ Summary: Peli Motto took you off the streets of Tatooine to become one of the best apprentices she's ever had - but honestly, the DUM droids are setting the bar pretty low. Still, you work out well for the first few months until an armored Mandalorian stranger lands with a busted-up ship and a strange magic baby and, well, you're intrigued. Even though you know you shouldn't be. Peli's always teling you to keep away from anything hot but sometimes, to fix something, you have to stick your hand straight into the fire.

Chapter One - The Arrival

“Hey, Peli! We got some hunk o’ junk requesting to land. Want me to tell him where to shove his rusty old comm signal?”

The older woman cranes over your shoulder as you swivel in the rickety chair in front of the array of control and communication panels. You’ve been working at Hangar Three-Five for a few months now, and you know it takes all sorts of ‘customers’ to keep a place like this running - but honestly. You’re surprised the wreck requesting the bay can even fly.

You’re even more surprised when Peli takes one look at the screen and shoves you out of the chair, hastily pressing the transmit button.

“Clearin’ you to land, Razor Crest,” she says hurriedly. “Sorry for the delay.” She takes her hand off the button and straightens to glare at you. “Never assume like that again, Girl,” she says, using your least favourite nickname for you. “That hunk o’ junk just might be my favorite customer.”

You gape at her as you brush off your coveralls. “You serious, Peli? I mean - are you sure, ma’am? I couldn’t even see a transponder code from that...vessel.” You choose your words a bit more carefully now, reminded that while Peli has a heart of gold, she has the temper of a Tusken.

“I’ve been workin’ in this hangar since you were a babe sucklin’ at your momma, Girl,” Peli says, pointing a wrench at you. “You’d do well to listen to me more’n you do.”

“Sorry, ma’am,” you sigh, looking down at the ground.

“Now, go on to the market, why don’tcha, and pick us up somethin’ for dinner. You may have a head thick as bantha hide, Girl, but at least you’re better at negotiating than the Dums.” You wince. You know you’re just an apprentice, but damn if it doesn’t sting whenever Peli compares you to the droids.

It’s not that you don’t like them. They just...creep you out a little. Soulless little machines, scuttling around as if they’re alive when they’re just - not. Whoever invented droids was one sick carosi pup.

Peli hands you a pouch of credits - the amount of which is dwindling daily. You wonder if the engineer’s eagerness to house this beaten-up old scupper doesn’t have something to do with their lack of funds. You consider offering to forego your wages until things are better - Peli has shown you incredible kindness, taking you in off the street when your next best bet was working as a dancing girl in one of Mos Eisley’s less reputable cantinas. Who knew where you woul’dve ended up after that. You prefer this, even though it’s hard, physical work, and you’re often up to your elbows in engine grease and covered head to toe in grime and oil.

Who knew starships were so dirty.They make sense, though, and you quickly proved that you had an aptitude for it. For pulling things apart and putting them back together again, but working. You’ve fixed busted motivators and blown capacitors that even left Peli scratching her head. You suppose that, rather than sentimentality, is why she keeps you around.

Either way, your life is pretty comfortable, now. Boring, but comfortable. You hope the credits situation isn’t going to change that.

How little you know.

---

You wander through the market, credits pouch too light in your pocket as you peruse the food stalls. You really don’t feel like dried krayt jerky a hundredth night in a row, so you’re glad Peli sent you out, but you are struggling to find something that is a) appealing and perhaps more importantly, b) affordable.

You end up in a heated argument - no, discussion - with a Toydarian over some deep-fried gorg before you give up, your temper and your impatience too piqued to settle on a decent price. You calm yourself with a trip past a stall selling all manner of imported cloth and fabrics: beautiful, delicate things, things you are not. A scarf made of deep blue silk that shimmers iridescent in the harsh sunlight catches your eye. You pause, running your fingers over it, your dirty, chipped nails a contrast to the smooth, satiny surface.

“It would suit you, pretty girl,” says a deep, male voice. You look up into the eyes of the stallholder. He’s a surprisingly handsome man, tall, with dark skin and hair and muscles bulging from a vest that seems tactically selected to show off as much of his bare chest as possible. For someone selling fabric, he’s certainly not wearing a lot of it.

“Sorry,” you say, taking your hand back. “I haven’t got enough credits for something like that.” The ‘pretty girl’ rankled you. You’re aware, tangentially, that underneath the layers of grease and oil you have features that some might consider comely, even attractive, and your body was good enough to catch the attention of some of the seedier businessmen when you were on the street. But it is the assumption itself that you are nothing more than your face and your body that bothers you.

“Suit yourself, gorgeous,” he calls after you as you walk away, back towards the smell of roasting meat. “I’ll be here if you change your mind!”

You grab a few deep-fried gorg from the Toydarian after all, a bottle of blue milk, and head back to the hangar in a thoughtful mood.

---

The ship has already landed by the time you get back.

It looks like it’s falling apart at the seams. In fact, you can spot several missing panels from the ground. Up close, you’re even more astonished that it managed to fly.

The ramp is stuck half-down, and you stand on your tiptoes to peer inside. It doesn’t look much better in there than on the outside. Dingy durasteel, crates all over the place, pathetic excuse for a hold, really. How can this be Peli’s ‘favourite customer’? It looks like it needs a complete teardown. Not even a rebuild, just...tear it down. It’s not even worthy to be a garbage hauler, it’s only suitable to be the garbage getting hauled. It-

“Like what you see?”

You almost drop the bags of food and produce and manage to avoid most of it flying everywhere, save for a single pale blue pika fruit that escapes and rolls across the ground to land against the stranger’s boot. You scuttle forward to grab it, and your hand is intercepted by a gloved one, yellow fingers closing around the fruit and lifting it from your view.

You straighten and look up, up, up into the Beskar helm of a Mandalorian.

“Oh,” you say in a very small voice. Now you understand.

You’ve heard and seen tales of Mandalorians - quite a legendary one lived here for a time, not that long ago - and some of those tales were from Peli herself. She’d never mentioned that she knew one, though.

This one is about the same as you imagine a Mandalorian to be. Armored from head to toe, no part of him visible, his eyes shielded by the inscrutable blackness of the T-shaped visor in his helm.

He can probably see everything, though, from your heartbeat down to the anxious flush in your skin as he steps toward you and says “Here.” He slips the pika fruit back into your bag and you nod, swallowing the sudden lump in your throat.

“Thanks.”

You stand there awkwardly for a moment while he just stares at you, as if he’s a droid himself, scanning you up and down through that damn visor. You clear your throat and cock your hip, placing your hand on it and raising your eyebrows.

“Is this your ship”?” You tap your knuckles against the hull behind you, miraculously not making another panel or part fall off. “What did you do to it?

“What?” His stance changes a little; he stands up a little straighter, his shoulders set, his hands hanging down by his sides with a little more purpose than before. Posturing, you think, that’s all it is, although you’re now a little nervous as you answer.

Because he is broad. Broad and well-built, if the fit of the armor is anything to go by. He could crush your head like a pika fruit without even trying.

Still, it has to be said, for a ship like that...“It looks like it’s about to fall apart,” you say, trying for diplomatic, but by tempering your vehemence it just sounds like you’re complaining.

The Mandalorian shrugs. “That’s why I brought it here.”

“Well, Peli is the best mechanic on Mos Eisley,” you capitulate, and you relax a little, enough to walk past him towards the control room. “I’m just surprised she’s not so picky with her clientele.”

“From what I hear, she can’t afford to be.” That stops you in your tracks. The Mandalorian has followed you, of course, and he’s right behind you as you enter the building and head to the kitchenette to put away dinner.

“You shouldn’t listen to everything you hear, Mandalorian,” you say as you unpack the bag of measly meat, fruit and vegetables you managed to get. It goes all in the cooler for a later barbeque. That is one of the things you enjoy most about being here - sitting with Peli in front of a makeshift campfire, cooking and talking. Not about anything in particular, just...talking.

“Well, if I’m wrong, I can just take my ships and my credits elsewhere,” the Mandalorian says with a shrug. It’s then you notice that he has a pouch he’s holding up, and it hangs heavy and clinks promisingly when it moves. You lick your lips nervously, hoping you’re not about to fuck up some big deal Peli has struck with this bounty hunter warrior.

Hoping you’re not about to be shot by this bounty hunter warrior.

“For example, I know the upkeep costs around here have risen recently,” he says, letting the pouch sway back and forth, and your eyes follow it like hypnosis. “Thanks to Peli taking on an apprentice…”

You sigh. “How much?”

“Five thousand.”

You do some quick maths in your head. “Might not cover any major components that need replacing, but it’s a start. You’ll have a vacuum seal again at least.”

“Good.” The Mandalorian tosses you the pouch and you catch it with both hands. It feels heavier than five thousand, but you’ll give it to Peli first. Speaking of - where the hell is Peli?

“There, how does that feel? Look at you, who’s a handsome li’l womp rat? You are!”

You have never heard Peli talk to anyone like that. You and the Mandalorian follow the sound of her voice out into the control room, and you find her cradling what looks like a small, wrinkled green baby, a creature with the face of a frog and ears of a bat, slightly damp and wrapped in what looks like-

“Is that - my shirt?” you ask, horrified. The creature blinks and coos at you.

“Had to give Grogu here a bath and I didn’t have any clean towels. So I borrowed your shirt. Look how cute he looks in it!” Peli tries to hand you the creature but you step out of the way. This is not how you saw your day going.

“Look, the Mandalorian here wants us to fix his ship,” you say. “He’s giving us five thousand.” You set the pouch down on the control panel. “I’m pretty sure it can be done, but if there are any busted capacitors or modulators that need fixing, that bill’s gonna go way up.”

“It’ll do,” Peli nods. “Meantime, I’ll look after this little guy. You even give him a bath last time I saw you? Don’t answer that, Mando.” Mando. So that’s what they call him. He doesn’t even have a name, just a shortening of his title.

“Guess I’ll get to work on the ship,” you grumble, rolling your eyes as you head back out into the hot Tattooine suns. Boring but comfortable. Yeah, right.

---

If this generates some interest I may continue to post chapters here! Otherwise, go ahead and read on AO3.

#the mandalorian fanfic #din djarin/reader #din djarin x female reader #mando x you #the apprentice

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disneyplusfan · 4 years ago

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Revisiting our first viewing of The Mandalorian S01E01

A look back at our reactions to Season 1 episodes as the new season of The Mandalorian begins.

November 24, 2019

The Mandalorian: Chapter 1 recap by K (includes detailed spoilers)

A Mandalorian bounty hunter tracks a target for a well-paying client.

Directed by Dave Filoni

Written by Jon Favreau

Music by Ludwig Gӧransson

Airdate: Nov 12, 2019

As I write this, I have watched the first three episodes of The Mandalorian three times now. I’m hooked. I did not expect to be. I expected to like it well enough — but not to love it.

I’m a Star Wars fan for *cough* many years, since childhood. Adore the original trilogy, intrigued yet annoyed by the prequels, less than wow’ed by the final trilogy. I like Rogue One. I also liked Solo, although I get that I’m one of maybe three people in that camp. I have not watched Clone Wars. So this is my frame of reference.

Boba Fett is perhaps my favorite character. He is one of the best characters in the franchise, and I will die on that hill. You know next to nothing about him, and that adds to his mystique. I read Tales of the Bounty Hunters and Tales of Jabba’s Palace back in the day, and “Last Man Standing: The Tale of Boba Fett” and his showdown with Han Solo will always be the quintessential Boba Fett/Mandalorian story for me, canon or not. I was enraged when they changed his voice in the original trilogy to Jango’s (like he couldn’t just be disguising his voice??).

For me, Boba Fett is the original Mandalorian against whom all others will be measured. I have spoken.

All this to say, my standards were high. My expectations for The Mandalorian in particular would have been even higher, if I wasn’t somewhat disappointed by the final trilogy of films. And this was the first live action Star Wars television series, so it’s uncharted territory.

I also managed not to be spoiled at all for this show going in, which was how I like it. Everything came to me fresh as I watched.

From the establishing shot, the cinematography is like the original series movies. Check. You feel immediately immersed in the Star Wars universe. Check. It’s a snowy ice world, like Hoth but greyer and flatter in terrain.

The titular Mandalorian, who is all but certainly not Boba Fett, as he looks a bit different in his armor (and the show is set 5 years or so after Return of the Jedi, which you don’t know yet in the show itself but meaning Boba Fett should be dead by now, or at least dying in the Sarlacc’s belly), looks good. Same imposing figure, same mysterious-yet-badass immediate impression in his imposing armor and weaponry. Can he pull it off? I mean that for the actor as much as the character. I know nothing about which actor is playing him (Pedro Pascal, from Game of Thrones, I learn later). I’ve remained completely unspoiled.

He’s holding a tracking device. So, also a bounty hunter. Check.

He’s heading for an establishment, a darkened bar, or saloon, or cantina. Inwardly I eyeroll a little. Another cantina?

From inside the bar we see the round spiral blast door opens from the middle outward and the Mandalorian is darkly silhouetted against the icy white exterior landscape.

Nice, iconic character-establishing shot. I am interested.

Simultaneously, the music starts. A soft, repetitive, lulling theme of eight wind notes vaguely Native American in tone that we will come to know quite well. For now, it adds a touch of mystery and suspense. The lulling, almost hypnotic aspect of the music gives the sense this is all just routine, and the Mandalorian’s short, almost imperceptible shake of the head as an insult is hurled at him seems to add to this effect.

Two patrons of the bar, a couple of aliens, have been roughing up a meek, chubby merman guy, some kind of aquatic creature. He’s a new species so that’s interesting. They are bullies, who threatened to cut off his glands, so the violent type, and it feels like Mos Eisley or worse. Inwardly I eyeroll again because we’ve seen this before in the original Star Wars film, A New Hope. Don’t they have any new ideas?

The Star Wars universe has at least one entire galaxy to play with. Yes, establish place as the Star Wars universe with familiar things. But within that we don’t need to keep seeing so many of the same things we have seen before. Give us some easter eggs because we’re fans, but give us new things to love, too. It’s a balance, and I personally want more new than repeat. One of my main gripes with the final trilogy is that it’s too much of the same, just with new characters who aren’t fleshed out and developed enough for me to care about them. But that’s another review.

So it’s a cantina, and they want Star Wars fans who are perhaps not as well versed as me (like say, my sister) to be oriented. Fine, I’ll be patient. I don’t doubt a bounty hunter will frequently find himself in such places.

All the patrons’ eyes are on the Mandalorian as he enters and stands at the bar counter. If you haven’t started to feel vaguely Western elements yet, they start to come now. He’s got his back to the rest of the bar, waiting. Almost baiting. The bullies immediately shift focus leaving the merman alone to go pick on him instead. It’s a mistake and everyone knows it. But they must test our hero. And I too, as if just another patron at this cantina, want to see them test him. I’m curious.

The loud one calls him “Mando!” and we have something of a name to call him for now. But it might be an insult and I’m not quite sure yet.

They seem interested in his armor — Beskar Steel — and this is something I personally have not heard of before. I’m interested.

A bit of Mandalorian taunting and a quick fight later, one of the bullies who tried to escape the bar is pulled into the blast door entryway as the Mandalorian’s grappling hook yanks him halfway back inside, and closes it, severing him in half. I let out a bitter laugh. It wouldn’t be Star Wars without some bully losing a body part in a bar fight, right? Check. And the Mandalorian proved himself badass, so far.

He goes over to the merman, who first just tries to thank him, then bribe him with credits and a drink. The stoic, imposing Mandalorian simply places a disc on the table in front of him, and immediately a holographic image pops up showing his face and name in Basic.

“Is that a bounty puck?” the merman asks. A device that’s new to me, perhaps not to others. Further interested. The weak man tries bargaining some more.

The Mandalorian brings a hand to his blaster and speaks for the first time.

“I can bring you in hot, or I can bring you in cold.”

Cut to opening title credits.

Perfect first line.

The voice itself doesn’t immediately wow me. It’s not as grizzled as Fett’s, it’s younger and somehow... unseasoned? I’m not sure. But it’s not Jango’s voice, so I’m willing to accept it. And again I think, why couldn’t Boba Fett have kept his original Jeremy Bulloch voice?

Title credits. Nice font. The drum beat theme music that also sounds vaguely Western. I like it.

Then we are back outside on the ice world, walking back up the path where we first saw the Mandalorian. He’s got the merman in handcuffs.

“I need passage, to the yards.”

An Ortollan, a species from the original series, plays a little flute and a land speeder comes up piloted by a droid.

“No droids.”

I find it interesting that our Mandalorian would prefer a living creature to a machine as a programmed droid should be more reliable but perhaps machines can be remote controlled, or else there’s a story there that I really want to hear.

The Ortolan plays his flute again and the next speeder comes up, a red one. It's considerably more broken down than the previous one, driven by an older guy in a hooded coat. “Where to?”

They pull up to a silver-colored ship of some kind, bigger than the Slave IV I think. Kind of clunky, really, more like a C-130 cargo transport than an F-16 fighter jet — not what you’d expect to be necessary for a bounty hunter to make quick getaways. Merman agrees with me.

“You’re kidding me, right? I’ll hire us a Livery Cruiser. I’ll pay for it. Just trying to make it pleasant.”

The speeder pilot meanwhile is scanning the horizon anxiously and demands payment. The Mando pays him. “I’d stay off the ice if I were you.” Something’s gonna attack, and probably from beneath the ice. Can’t wait.

Merman is worried and watches the speeder depart into the distance as the Mando readies the ship.

Something launches up from under the ice and consumes the speeder, and a snakelike body with dragon-like spinal plates disappears beneath it again. Merman freaks out and demands they hurry as the ice cracks in their direction.

The Mando yanks him out of the way just in time for a giant walrus-tusked creature with a long body launches out next to the ship. It catches part of the ship’s landing gear in its mouth as they try to take off and there’s a familiar sound effect like the Falcon losing power.

The Mandalorian grabs his tuning-fork weapon from outside the cabin doors (where it stays when it’s not on his back) and heads out to fight. The creature has one of the landing gear legs in its mouth as the music swells very tribal. One zap from the tuning fork weapon and the creature is electrified, immediately lets go, and they escape.

The ship is more impressive in air than on the ground as two enormous jets fire. It seems heavy though. I don’t see any weapons except two forward cannons of some kind, but of course there is probably ample hidden weaponry. Can’t wait.

Once in space the merman starts bargaining and conversing but the Mandalorian is silent, having none of it.

“I like your ship,” the merman says, now trying to butter him up. “She’s classic. Razor Crest, am I right? Pre-Empire?”

So it’s an older ship. The cockpit, entryway and ramp, halls and hull are quite wide and roomy. It makes sense that a bounty hunter needs room to carry cargo. I suppose some quarry may be quite large depending on species. I’d like to see him have to capture something large. I wonder if he has a larger ship because he’s young, and can’t yet afford something speedier. Or perhaps he loves it, despite being old and possibly rickety, like Han loved the Falcon. It doesn’t look like it’s been through the wars, though, so that’s a mystery. Can’t wait to learn more about the ship.

Merman goes below on the pretense of having to use the evacuation tube. There’s some funny toilet humor here. There’s no restroom, the evac tube is in the middle of the floor against a wall--kind of like a New York City basement apartment I viewed once. To the right of the evac tube is a wall with what looks like a palette inside -- I guess that’s where the Mandalorian sleeps? It’s hard to tell.

Merman keeps exploring as he talks. Finds a cache of weapons but surprisingly just closes it again. And then he finds the other bounties.

This actually pissed me off on first viewing. The Mandalorian has several other quarry below deck--all encased in carbonite. I did a massive eyeroll here. Boba Fett (really, Vader) encased Han in carbonite as a matter of convenience at the location they were at in Cloud City. It was a test to see if he could transport Luke that way to the Emperor--IF he survived. But it’s NOT like it was the preferred mode of choice for bounty hunters to transport their quarry. So why would this Mandalorian just happen to have not just bounties in carbon freeze on his ship but has a carbon freezing /chamber/ on the ship, as he shoves the merman into it.

This really annoyed me until a friend suggested maybe the other hunters heard about Fett and Han at Jabba’s Palace and it became a thing once they knew it wouldn’t kill the bounty. After some thought I have accepted this idea, even though it seems quick if this is only set 5 years after Jedi. Still, the other Mandalorians would have been among the first to know, and it’s a more practical mode of transport allowing low risk of escape and not having to address your quarry’s various biological needs. Also easily stackable while protecting them. So okay, I’ve come to accept it.

Mando arrives at a spaceport in a semi-large desert city, that actually looks a lot like Tatooine--both what we’ve seen from the original trilogy and the prequels. They never actually state where we are at any of these locations, but this is my theory. There’s a droid like Red, there are people walking around dressed like Tatooine inhabitants. More evidence comes later in the series.

He enters another drinking establishment that seems to be the meeting place for his contact. The feel is very much like the bar where Han shot Greedo, and I wouldn’t be surprised if it was even the same one years later. Aliens of all types, again, watching him closely.

He meets his contact and returns the fobs. Payment is arranged. The Mandalorian says the Empire is gone, and he accepts Calamari flan at half than Imperial credits at full payment.

The question of the next job comes up. Guild rates are high. The Mando wants the highest. 5,000 doesn’t cover fuel these days.

The contact says “Well, there is one job.” No puck. Face to face, direct commission. Pays well. “Underworld?” No codes. The Mandalorian accepts the chip.

More of the city. Goes to a back-alley establishment. Arrives at a door with a TT-8L/Y7 gatekeeper droid, like at Jabba’s Palace. Inside is a walking garbage-can droid like in the Jawa’s ship. I take this as more evidence we are on Tatooine, though of course these items could be sold throughout the galaxy.

Inside there are four Stormtroopers. An older man with an Imperial pendant who is clearly the leader and client. “Greef Carga said you were coming.” So that’s the Mando’s contact back at the bar. “He said you were the best in the parsec.” Haha, at least we are using parsec correctly now.

A side door opens, which startles the Mandalorian and he draws his tuning fork weapon (a modified amban phase-pulse blaster rifle). The four Stormtroopers draw also. A younger man with glasses comes in, shielding his face, apologizing profusely. The client introduces him as Doctor Pershing. A scientist. The Mandalorian still has weapons drawn in both hands, facing off with the Stormtroopers. “We have you four to one.�� “I like those odds,” he responds. “He also said you were expensive. Very expensive.”

All calms down and the client invites him to sit. He unfolds a block of beskar steel as down payment. He has more upon delivery of the asset -- alive. Proof of termination is also acceptable for a lower fee. The Doctor protests.

No puck. Tracking fob, age, and last known positional data only. The quarry is 50 years old.

“It is good to return the beskar back to the Mandalorians. It is good to restore the natural order of things after so much disarray, don’t you agree?”

The Mandalorian pauses here and almost imperceptibly again cocks his head. He touched a nerve. Amazing how an actor can still convey so much behind a helmet. I still don’t know this actor but he’s pulling it off.

More of the city. Whatever that laughing thing was at Jabba’s feet, two of his species are roasting on a spit. One more is in a cage. (It’s a Kowakian monkey-lizard like Salacious Crumb. I had to look that up.)

The Mandalorian ducks in behind a curtain. Down some steps. Strings here that sound very Star Wars. A long hall with other Mandalorians about. Some have the helmet antenna like Fett. Some are small, running. Children.

At the end of the hall over the archway is a Mandalorian skull emblem. Within is a person working at a forge, hammering metal and heating it over a ring of open gas flames like Bunsen burners. The blacksmith, which IMDB tells me is Armorer, comes forward and sits down with our Mandalorian. There is fur around the collar, the helmet is different, golden with two small horns, and looks more like a gladiator helmet. From the way she moves, and especially once she speaks, this is a woman. I am intrigued, since I have not seen a female Mandalorian before. They nod respectfully to one another. The Mando produces his payment: the Calamari flan--and then, the bar of Beskar steel, marked with an Imperial insignia at one corner. She is visibly surprised and impressed.

“This was gathered in the Great Purge. It is good it is back with the tribe. A pauldron is in order. Has your signet been revealed?”

“Not yet.”

“Soon.”

A pause here to discuss armor. Any show about Mandalorians was going to have certain elements. Ships, weapons, lore, armor.

Mandalorian armor is famous in the Star Wars universe. Beskar steel, the material it is made of, is strong, and can withstand almost anything, yet very light, rather like mithril in the Lord of the Rings universe. It would seem the Great Purge by the Empire included not just Jedi but Mandalorians, and their armor was melted into bars, as currency or for transport. (This is speculation on my part.) And that a goal of the Mandalorians is to reclaim as much beskar as possible, and reforge it back into Mandalorian armor.

The blacksmith does just this and makes him a pauldron, or shoulder cover, from the bar of beskar. She tells him this is extremely generous and the excess will sponsor many foundlings.

“That’s good,” he responds. “I was once a foundling.”

“I know.”

A bit more of our hero’s background.

Her forge is a combination of computerized part designs and heavy iron machinery, like a 3-D printer on steroids. And as it bangs out the new pauldron each loud clang of metal on metal shows us a brief flashback of our Mandalorian’s memories. A battle with fire and sparks all around. A woman in dark red robe carrying a boy also in dark red robe. He is terrified. Presumably this is our hero. She is carrying him, he’s maybe 8-10 years old. A man is with her, her husband? People getting shot--massacred--all around them as they run. Explosions. She opens an underground container of some sort, deposits the boy. He has brown hair, brown eyes, and olive skin. He reaches for her as the doors close. And then the pauldron is completed; the flashbacks stop.

Having viewed 3 episodes already, this becomes a pattern and I love this device. You get a little more of his backstory with each piece of armor, with each clang of the forge. It’s perfect. It makes sense that in these moments as he waits in this safe place, he might slip into memories. Or perhaps they come unbidden at this time for some reason. There’s also a nice theme of memories being buried beneath his armor, along with his emotions. And only when there’s a chink in the armor, does it show through.

The pauldron goes on, shiny and new, and for the first time I notice the wipes. A center point wipe expanding outward, with fuzzy borders, and so very Star Wars that it makes you smile.

He heads to another planet that looks from space like Tatooine. If we weren’t on Tatooine before, we might be now. We are at least in the vicinity. It’s a desert planet with jagged sandstone cliffs all around. He lands his shiny ship, and gets out with the fob. He looks through his turning-fork weapon’s scope, and spots two distant creatures I can only describe as land grouper with legs and long tails. Suddenly he is attacked by one, sinking its teeth into his arm before he can get a shot off, and then a second, and though he fights with flamethrower and even fists, it looks like we will lose our hero until someone shoots them with taser darts.

It appears our hero is not wounded, but his arm pieces are damaged.

A small man with a piglike face and a kind, wise voice and goggles on his head. An ugnaught. Remember them from the original trilogy? IMDB tells me his name is Kuill, although this is never actually said in the episode, so I will refer to him as the ugnaught.

I suspect anonymity is a running theme in this show, as part of the Western genre. So far we’ve heard almost no character names (which makes writing reviews a little difficult). I’m wondering if there’s any significance to the ones we do know, vs. the ones we don’t.

“You are a bounty hunter. I will help you. I have spoken.” This last part is his trademark line, as we’ll see. I love it.

We go to what looks like a wind or moisture farm. There is, from what I can see, only one sun.

The ugnaught tells the Mandalorian that others have come looking and died. He will show him the way for half of the blurg they caught. Mando will have to learn how to ride them to pass to the compound.

On the first few attempts the blurg throws him. Apparently it’s a female; the males are all eaten during mating. (Thanks for that tidbit, Kuiil.) He gets thrown again and loses patience, asking for a speeder.

The ugnaught challenges him.

“You are a Mandalorian. Your ancestors rode the great mythosaur. Surely you can ride this young blurg.”

Our hero is challenged; the words touched him. He approaches the blurg like a wild horse that needs breaking in, and the Western theme is back, even in the music. Eventually he succeeds, a triumphant moment that impresses the ugnaught, and they’re off across the landscape full of ravines that only the blurg can jump, apparently. The theme music swells until they arrive at a cliff where they can spy on the encampment. This is where the bounty hunter’s quarry is.

Mando tries to pay him off. Ugnaught reveals his motive: it’s been an endless stream of warriors trying to get this quarry, breaking the peace. He’s read the stories about Mandalorians and believes ours can make quick work of it and bring peace back to his land.

Our boy does some recon with a hand telescope and the place is swarming. Then he spots a bounty droid, and groans. The droid is just walking right in, and demands the asset be produced.

The bounty droid looks like IG-88 from The Empire Strikes Back and again, for a moment, I almost eye rolled because really, can’t we see something new? All bounty droids look the same? But whereas IG-88 just stood there, this one moves, and the way he moves is COOL. Although humanoid in appearance like 3PO (head, two arms, two legs), unlike 3PO he appears to operate around a central pole or spine, allowing his parts to rotate 360 degrees. This includes his head, his eyes, his arms and therefore weapons, and his waist/hips. It gives him an amazing advantage as he can just keep spinning and shooting. The way he steps over a body is awesome. He’s also really skinny and thus hard to hit. Whole new respect for the IG series.

This IG unit is also funny, and his repartee with our Mandalorian is instant comedic chemistry. There’s a fantastic shootout, where they team up, and as they are outnumbered, the bounty droid seeing no way out, keeps trying to self-destruct. “Do not self destruct!” our Mando keeps shouting at him, and after a very badass moment with an [ion machine gun], by the end they win, and everyone in the yard lies dead. Mando helps him up, saying “You’re not so bad for a droid,” and the droid replies likewise. I saw a sidekick in the making. They shoot their way inside, kill a few more people until there’s no one left, and determine the quarry is just before them in the corner.

Except there is no one there, just a white ball looking thing with a net over it that the fobs indicate is the target.

They remove the net, and open the ball, which is really more egg-shaped.

And then it opens, it looks more like a bassinet with a blanket inside.

“Wait--” says Mando. “They said 50 years old.”

“Species age differently,” replies the IG unit. And we get our first glimpse over the top of the blanket as he says “Perhaps it could live many centuries. Sadly, we’ll never know.” And as he’s speaking, a little head peeks over the blanket.

Oh. My. God. And in this one moment, I am glued to this show forever.

It’s a baby Yoda.

Except it isn’t Yoda, because Yoda’s dead. But we don’t know Yoda’s species name, and we don’t know the baby’s given name, so we will call it what the internet has dubbed it in the meantime: Baby Yoda.

And this moment, above all, is the biggest reason I am so glad I wasn’t spoiled.

Baby Yoda is the most adorable, most precious, most endearing thing you have ever seen. And in a franchise that has at times been criticized for its more saccharine “cute” creatures that appeal to young children (Ewoks, anyone?), this is one we can all get behind.

Baby Yoda is CUTE. <3

Baby Yoda is everything.

Remember my aversion to anything we’ve seen already? I NO LONGER CARE. Looking at those huge brown eyes and long floppy ears, this doesn’t even cross my mind.

I would give my life for Baby Yoda. I know this all in one second.

And the IG unit is about to kill it.

Apparently our Mando feels something similar.

“Wait,” he says, and reaching out he lowers the IG unit’s weapon. “We’ll bring it in alive.”

“The commission was quite specific. The asset was to be terminated.” The IG unit raises his blaster again, aimed squarely at the crib.

The camera closes in on the Mandalorian’s helmet, fixed on the bassinet, and there is a red blaster flash from his right, reflected in the helmet. The Mando’s head never moves.

But the IG unit falls to the floor, shot in the head. Sizzling. He’s toast.

Our guy shot him without even looking. He’s fixated on Baby Yoda, as we all are. He puts his own blaster away, and tilts his head.

The camera cuts to a gorgeous profile, backlit from a doorway. The Mandalorian stands before the crib, which is now floating in the air at waist height. He raises a finger towards the crib, as a tiny finger comes up from inside it. They don’t quite meet.

End credits.

End credits for this show are a series of beautiful concept drawings and if you know Star Wars at all, these are some stunning art. The whole theme also plays over the end credits and it is hauntingly beautiful. Ludwig Gӧransson’s score is perfect.

Thoughts.

Themes: Space western. Anonymity. (Even the ship still has no name, just a model.) Foundlings. Characters that seem to have no family, but instead bond in other social ways (covert/religion, bounty hunter guild/profession). Remnants. Loss.

I LOVE the concept art at the end. Fans love this concept art, and I have a couple of books of it myself. Nice way to incorporate it into the series. You can see how the original concept and final product differ (very little, in most cases) and a few intriguing pieces that were either filmed but cut from the final edit or never filmed. I love how they add the 3-D effect to some of the drawings, and I still don’t know how Hollywood achieves that.

Concept art round-up:

Mando and Baby Yoda’s ET moment

Some intriguing glow-dice game between two Mandalorians? I need to know more about this.

Mando firing a blaster

Mando entering a cantina

Mando and Kuiil on Blurrback

Mando and IG-11 taking cover during battle

Mando and Kuiil entering Kuiil’s home

Mando walking on the icescape with his back facing the camera

Mando battling the ice creature while hanging out of the Razor Crest

Mando and IG-11 standing shoulder to shoulder

Mando on Blurrgback

Taika Waititi is amazing as the IG unit bounty droid. Never would have guessed it was him.

Werner Herzog is perfect as The Client, I love his voice, and the article/video about him crying over Baby Yoda.

This show is going to get me writing fanfic again, dammit.

*****

The Mandalorian: Chapter 1 recap by K (includes detailed spoilers)

A Mandalorian bounty hunter tracks a target for a well-paying client.

Directed by Dave Filoni

Written by Jon Favreau

Music by Ludwig Gӧransson Airdate: Nov 12, 2019

Run Time: 40m

Greef Karga (Carl Weathers)

The Client (Werner Herzog)

Dr. Pershing (Omid Abtahi)

Kuiil (Nick Nolte, voice)

IG-11 (Taika Waititi, voice; Rio Hackford, performance artist)

Mythrol (Horatio Sanz)

Alpha Trawler (Tait Fletcher)

Beta Trawler (Ryan Watson)

Quarren Trawler (Dmitrious Bistrevsky)

Armorer (Emily Swallow)

#the mandalorian #the mandalorion season 1 recap #disneyplusfan #tha mandalorion s01e01 #star wars

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sweusource · 6 years ago

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ESSENTIAL STAR WARS LEGENDS/EXPANDED UNIVERSE BOOKS.

Many people have asked for that, so I decided to do a list with the essential novels and comics of the EU/Legends. This is my personal opinion and I have a very bad memory too so I guess, I haven’t included many others, so if you think there’s a book or any other EU content that should be on this list too, please, just let me know and I’ll put them on this list.

Obviously, I haven’t read all the books of the EU and tbh I’m not a fan of anything related to Rise of the Empire era, prequels, and The Clone Wars. All my favorite content is from Rebellion Era and post-ROTJ.

Anyway, here it’s my list of the most important novels and comics of the EU.

The EU books are divided into different eras.

Before the Republic Era - 37,000 BBY to 25,000 BBY

Old Republic Era - 5000 BBY (years before the Battle of Yavin to 1000 BBY)

Rise of the Empire Era - 1000 BBY to 22 BBY

Clone Wars Era - 22 BBY to 19 BBY

Imperial Era - 19 BBY to 0 BBY

Rebellion Era - 0 BBY to 4 ABY (4 years after the Battle of Yavin)

New Republic Era - 5.5 ABY to 22 ABY

New Jedi Order Era - 24.5 ABY to 36 ABY

Legacy Era - 40 ABY to 139 ABY

BEFORE THE REPUBLIC ERA

Dawn of the Jedi: Into The Void

Dawn of the Jedi

Force Storm

The Prisoner of Bogan

Force War

OLD REPUBLIC ERA

Tales of the Jedi

The Golden Age of the Sith

The Fall of the Sith Empire

Ulic Qel-Droma and the Beast Wars of Onderon

The Saga of Nomi Sunrider

The Freedon Nadd Uprising

Dark Lords of the Sith

The Sith War

Redemption

Crosscurrent

Knights of The Old Republic (Comics)

Crossroads

Commencement

Flashpoint

Reunion

Days of Fear

Nights of Anger

Daze of Hate

Knights of Suffering

Vector

Exalted

Turnabout

Vindication

Prophet Motive

Faithful Execution

Dueling Ambitions

Masks

The Reaping

Destroyer

Demon

War

The Old Republic Novels

Fatal Alliance

Deceived

Revan

Annihilation

Knight Errant

Aflame

Deluge

Escape

Darth Bane Trilogy

Path of Destruction

Rule of Two

Dynasty of Evil

RISE OF THE EMPIRE ERA

Legacy of the Jedi

Part 1 (chapter 1 onward) takes place during 89 BBY.

Part 2, "Dooku and Qui-Gon Jinn" (chapter 7 onward) takes place during 76 BBY.

Part 3 "Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi" (chapter 14 onward) takes place during 44 BBY.

Part 4 "Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker" (chapter 20 onward) takes place during 22 BBY

Darth Plagueis

Jedi: The Dark Side

Jedi Apprentice

The Rising Force

The Dark Rival

The Hidden Past

The Mark of the Crown

The Defenders of the Dead

The Uncertain Path

The Captive Temple

The Day of Reckoning

The Fight for Truth

The Shattered Peace

The Deadly Hunter

The Evil Experiment

The Dangerous Rescue

The Ties That Bind

The Death of Hope

The Call to Vengeance

The Only Witness

The Threat Within

Secrets of the Jedi

The Rise and Fall of Darth Vader

Cloak of Deception

Episode I: The Phantom Menace (Novelization)

Republic

Prelude to Rebellion

Vow of Justice

Outlander

Emissaries to Malastare

Twilight

Infinity's End

The Hunt for Aurra Sing

Darkness

The Stark Hyperspace War

The Devaronian Version

Rite of Passage

Honor and Duty

The New Face of War

The Battle of Jabiim

Show of Force

Dreadnaughts of Rendili

Trackdown

Siege of Saleucami

Into the Unknown

Hidden Enemy

Jedi Quest

Path to Truth

The Way of the Apprentice

The Trail of the Jedi

The Dangerous Games

The Master of Disguise

The School of Fear

The Shadow Trap

The Moment of Truth

The Changing of the Guard

The False Peace

The Final Showdown

Outbound Flight

The Approaching Storm

Episode II Attack of the Clones (Novelization)

The Cestus Deception

Jedi Trial

Episode III Revenge of the Sith (Novelization)

Dark Lord: The Rise of Darth Vader

Kenobi

The Cestus Deception

Darth Vader and the Lost Command

Coruscant Nights

Mace Windu

Shaak Ti

Aayla Secura

Count Dooku

Yoda

Darth Vader and the Ninth Assassin

Jedi

Jedi Twilight

Street of Shadows

Patterns of Force

The Last of the Jedi

The Desperate Mission

Dark Warning

Underworld

Death on Naboo

A Tangled Web

Return of the Dark Side

Secret Weapon

Against the Empire

Master of Deception

Reckoning

The Last Jedi

Darth Vader and the Cry of Shadows

A New Hope: The Life of Luke Skywalker

Rebel Dawn

Death Star

The Han Solo Adventures

Han Solo at Stars' End

Han Solo's Revenge

Han Solo and the Lost Legacy

Dark Forces (Novellas)

Soldier for the Empire

Rebel Agent

Jedi Knight

Han Solo Trilogy

The Paradise Snare

The Hutt Gambit

Rebel Dawn

The Lando Calrissian Adventures

Lando Calrissian and the Mindharp of Sharu

Lando Calrissian and the Flamewind of Oseon

Lando Calrissian and the Starcave of ThonBoka

REBELLION ERA

Episode IV: A New Hope (Novelization)

The Fight for Justice

Tales from the Mos Eisley Cantina

Scoundrels

Rebel Force

Target

Hostage

Renegade

Firefight

Trapped

Uprising

Allegiance

Choices of One

Empire and Rebellion

Razor's Edge

Honor Among Thieves

Splinter of the Mind's Eye (The first Expanded Universe novel)

Episode V The Empire Strikes Back (Novelization)

Shadows of the Empire

Mara Jade. By The Emperor’s Hand

Mara Jade: A Night on the Town

Tales from Jabba's Palace

Episode VI: Return of the Jedi (Novelization)

The Truce at Bakura

NEW REPUBLIC ERA

Jedi Prince

The Glove of Darth Vader

The Lost City of the Jedi

Zorba the Hutt's Revenge

Mission from Mount Yoda

Queen of the Empire

Prophets of the Dark Side

Tales from the New Republic

Luke Skywalker and the Shadows of Mindor

X-Wing (Different eras and timelines) (from 6.5 ABY to 44 ABY)

Rogue Squadron

Wedge's Gamble

The Krytos Trap

The Bacta War

Wraith Squadron

Iron Fist

Solo Command

Isard's Revenge

Starfighters of Adumar

Mercy Kill

The Courtship of Princess Leia

Tatooine Ghost

The Thrawn Trilogy (Novels and Comics)

Heir to the Empire

Dark Force Rising

The Last Command

Dark Empire

Vol I

Vol II

Empire’s End

The Jedi Academy Trilogy

Jedi Search

Dark Apprentice

Champions of the Force

I, Jedi

Children of the Jedi

Darksaber

Planet of Twilight

The Crystal Star

The Black Fleet Crisis Trilogy

Before the Storm

Shield of Lies

Tyrant’s Test

The New Rebellion

The Corellian Trilogy

Ambush at Corellia

Assault at Selonia

Showdown at Centerpoint

The Hand of Thrawn Duology

Specter of the Past

Vision of the Future

Union

Judge's Call (Short Story)

Scourge

Junior Jedi Knights

The Golden Globe

Lyric's World

Promises

Anakin's Quest

Vader's Fortress

Kenobi's Blade

Survivor’s Quest

Young Jedi Knights

The Rise of the Shadow Academy

Heirs of the Force

Shadow Academy

The Lost Ones

Lightsabers

Darkest Knight

Jedi Under Siege

The Fall of the Diversity Alliance

Shards of Alderaan

Diversity Alliance

Delusions of Grandeur

Jedi Bounty

The Emperor's Plague

Under Black Sun

Return to Ord Mantell

Trouble on Cloud City

Crisis at Crystal Reef

NEW JEDI ORDER ERA

The New Jedi Order (NJO)

Vector Prime

Dark Tide Duology (Onslaught and Ruin)

Agents of Chaos Duology (Hero's Trial and Jedi Eclipse)

Balance Point

Recovery

Edge of Victory Duology (Conquest and Rebirth)

Star by Star

Dark Journey

Enemy Lines Duology (Rebel Dream and Rebel Stand)

Traitor

Destiny's Way

Ylesia

Force Heretic Trilogy (Remnant, Refugee and Reunion)

The Final Prophecy

The Unifying Force

Dark Nest

The Joiner King

The Unseen Queen

The Swarm War

LEGACY ERA

Legacy Of The Force

Betrayal

Bloodlines

Tempest

Exile

Sacrifice

Inferno

Fury

Revelation

Invincible

Fate Of The Jedi

Outcast

Omen

Abyss

Backlash

Allies

Vortex

Conviction

Ascension

Apocalypse

Crucible

Legacy (Comics) (50 Issues/10 Volumes)

Book I

Book II

Book III

#star wars #sweu #resources #books #long post #by violeta

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aion-rsa · 5 years ago

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Star Wars: Best Bounty Hunter Stories

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With the release of The Mandalorian, it's time to take a look back at the best Star Wars bounty hunter stories!

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With The Mandalorian exploring a lawless corner of the galaxy far, far away, bounty hunters -- the scum of the galaxy -- are now at the forefront of the Star Wars universe. Certainly, it's been a long time for fans of the most famous bounty hunter of all, Boba Fett. But, as the famous scene in The Empire Strikes Back shows, there's a whole stable of bounty hunters working across the galaxy for the highest bidder.

Besides Boba Fett, the other intergalactic scum only had a few seconds of screen time in The Empire Strikes Back, but those brief ticks of a clock were unforgettable. The image of a few alien toughs, some truly salty looking armored humans, and even a few droids fueled the imaginations of Star Wars fans for generations. So we thought we’d take this opportunity to spotlight some of the coolest Expanded Universe tales featuring Dengar, IG-88, Boba Fett, Bossk, Zuckuss, and 4-LOM.

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Now remember, most of these stories were wiped out of continuity when Disney took over the galaxy far, far away, but that doesn’t make them any less readable and awesome. And yeah, we may even have a few that are part of the current Star Wars canon.

We promise there will be no disintegrations as we turn back time and examine the coolest bounty hunter stories of the Star Wars galaxy:

Dengar

Ah Dengar, we know kids of the 80s probably referred to you as Diaper Head, but you are still badass. Dengar was front and center when Vader gave the bounty hunters their marching orders and could also be seen chilling out in Jabba’s Palace in Return of the Jedi. Dengar was played by Morris Bush, an actor who also appeared in Hammer’s Scars of Dracula (1970), the Christopher Lee pot boiler Creeping Flesh (1973), and the bizarre Ringo Starr musical comedy Son of Dracula (1974). Interestingly enough, Bush worked as a stand in for David Prowse in Star Wars (1977). According to Prowse, that is Bush’s foot you can see kicking Obi-Wan’s cape after Luke’s mentor is struck down by the Dark Lord of the Sith.

But where can you read about ‘ol Diaper Head? In the 1996 Kevin J. Anderson-edited Tales of the Bounty Hunters anthology (get ready, this isn’t the only time I’m going to mention this collection in this article), author Dave Wolverton related Dengar’s origin in a short tale entitled "Payback." In this piece of essential Dengar fiction (yes, such a thing exists), Wolverton details that Dengar used to be a swoop bike racer who was injured as a teenager by his racing rival. Of course, that rival was none other than a young Han Solo. Wolverton makes Dengar’s vendetta against the captain of Millennium Falcon very personal.

Read More: Star Wars Movie and TV Release Date Calendar

But Wolverton’s hyper-readable story isn’t our Expanded Universe essential Dengar pick. That honor goes to the season four episode of Star Wars: The Clone Wars entitled "Bounty." In this toyetic installment of Clone Wars, an aimless Asajj Ventress joins up with a band of roguish bounty hunters that includes a teenage Boba Fett, Bossk, and the grizzled, weathered Dengar. Dengar plays a secondary role in this episode (doesn’t he always) to Fett and Ventress, but when Dengar springs into action, he truly shines. Better yet, Dengar is voiced by lifelong Star Wars lover Simon Pegg (Shaun of the Dead, Star Trek), and you just know that when Pegg was a wee lad he took his Kenner Dengar figure on many adventures. Pegg’s Star Wars enthusiasm shows as he fills the once tabula rasa Dengar with a salty, badass personality. "Bounty" was a Dirty Dozen-like adventure through the underbelly of the Star Wars galaxy and finally gave fans a sense of who the bandaged badass of Star Wars truly is.

IG-88

With a scant few seconds of screen team, IG-88 showed the world that not every droid in the Star Wars universe is cutesy. Yeah, we saw a few black imperial R2 and R5 units and a smattering of Death Star sroids, but IG-88 was a different mechanical animal all together. IG-88 was all sharp edges with a surreal design and multiple big honking firearms. Fans only got one quick glimpse of this death machine, but it was enough to emblazon this oddly shaped engine of destruction in fans’ minds forever. IG-88 was built and operated by puppeteer and effects guru Bill Hargreaves, and by operated I mean that Hargreaves moved IG’s head a tiny bit in Empire. But, damn, what a creation!

So we’re going to take IG-88’s chosen chronicle from the aforementioned Tales of the Bounty Hunters. In a short story entitled "Therefore I Am," it was revealed that everyone’s favorite murder droid had a great deal in common with Marvel’s Ultron. You see, in this tale, it was revealed that there were actually four models of IG-88 that shared the same malevolent consciousness. The IG master intelligence wanted to kick start a droid revolution and conquer the galaxy, but when it was activated, IG-88 murdered its creators and then built three duplicates of itself. One of those duplicates answered Vader’s call for bounty hunters while the others began plotting for the droid uprising. After Vader gave his marching orders, IG-88 stealthily downloaded Imperial files off the ships’ computer. Through this data theft, the assassin droid discovered top secret plans detailing the construction of a second Death Star.

Read More: Star Wars Movies Disney+ Streaming Guide

After IG sent that info to his duplicates, it tracked Solo to Bespin where it had a violent encounter with Boba Fett. Hey, remember the IG carcass in the background of the Ugnaught smelter sequence in The Empire Strikes Back, the one where the little pig people played keep away with Chewbacca? Yeah, this short story explains that carcass, as Fett blasts the IG unit to oblivion. But there were still three IG-88s out there. Two of them went after Fett but the last remaining IG-88, get this now, downloaded itself into and took over the freaking Death Star. Yes, according to Anderson’s "Therefore I Am," at the end of Return of the Jedi, the Death Star gained sentience thanks to IG-88. Of course, this was right before Lando Calrissian, Wedge Antilles, and Nein Numb blew the sucker up, but still, a malevolently intelligent Death Star is about as badass as it gets. That certainly would have led to the droid uprising, if not for fate and a fateful, last ditch bid at freedom by a desperate band of rebels.

IG-88—from a blink and you’ll miss it first appearance to a bee’s eyelash away from wiping out all non-mechanical life in the galaxy. Awesome.

Boba Fett

Can you imagine Star Wars without Fett? Honestly, the whole saga wouldn’t have been much different on screen, but it certainly would be fundamentally altered in the hearts and minds of fans, because Boba Fett’s legend lives in the Expanded Universe, or fans’ own personal expanded universes at least. There is a mystique to Fett. Maybe it’s because Boba Fett was the first mail away action figure which signaled to SW fans everywhere after 1977’s Star Wars that there would be more adventures in a galaxy far, far away to come. Perhaps it’s the fact that the Fett figure was supposed to feature a rocket-firing backup until Kenner grew worried that kids would choke on Fett’s spring loaded missile. Dude, Fett is so dangerous he was considered a threat to real world children before he made his film debut. Take that Dengar!

Perhaps it’s that badass souped up Stormtrooper like armor that Fett wears or perhaps it is because every inch of this gravelly voiced outlaw is covered in dangerous armaments. There are countless reasons that the whole world has a Boba Fettish and the stories we are about to list take advantage of this rarified adoration. It’s hard to narrow down just one great Boba Fett Expanded Universe story, so we won’t. We’ll hit you with a few.

Boba Fett was played by Jeremy Bulloch in both The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. For years, no one knew the lethal bounty hunter’s origins until George Lucas detailed Fett’s clone birth in Star Wars: Attack of the Clones (2002), but before that, Fett was a mystery than many Expanded Universe creators tried to shed some light on.

Read More: Who are the Mandalorians?

First up is a yarn entitled "Prey" that appeared in Dark Horse Comics’ Star Wars Tales #11 (2002). This flashback story written and drawn by Kia Asamiya features Fett being dispatched by Moff Tarkin to retrieve Han Solo after the future hero of the Rebellion defects from the Imperial Navy. Darth Vader disagrees with giving this assignment to a bounty hunter and goes after Solo himself. This leads to Fett and Vader engaging in an eye popping lightsaber battle in the middle of the Mos Eisley Cantina! Fett, who had procured a lightsaber from a dead Jedi (awesome), held his own against Vader, proving that this bounty hunter backs down from no man. Solo escaped by attaching his ship to a Star Destroyer and floating away when the warship dumped its garbage. Hmm, that sounds familiar, huh? This battle also built that subtle grudging respect that can be felt when Vader addressed Fett aboard the Star Destroyer Executer in Empire.

From the Dark Horse era to the first Marvel Comics era, let us go back in time to Star Wars #81 (1984) by Jo Duffy, Ron Frenz, Tom Palmer, and Tom Mandrake. There have been a number of Expanded Universe accounts of Boba Fett escaping the Sarlaac Pit, but this semi-classic published by Marvel just happens to be the first. The issue was entitled (get ready for it) "Jawas of Doom!" Let that sink in for a moment.

The story takes place just after the Battle of Endor and sees Han Solo searching for some extra cash. Han, Chewbacca, Leia, R2, and C-3P0 fly to Tatooine so Han can withdraw his credits from a Mos Eisely bank. Sadly, Han’s credits were frozen at the same time he was (in carbonite, natch!). Meanwhile, Boba Fett was spat out by the Sarlaac Pit and picked up by aggressive Jawas. It seems that since Jabba the Hutt’s demise, the Jawas have become more and more aggressive. In other words, the only thing that was keeping these hooded desert rodents in check was a mob boss, and now that Jabba is gone, the Jawas have become a gaggle of little murder bundles. So the Jawas droidnap R2-D2 and Boba Fett, whom they mistake for a droid due to his strange armor. Boba Fett has amnesia because comics and becomes the Jawas hapless prisoner (this is like an action figure adventure I would have had with a 103 degree fever).

Read More: Star Wars TV Series Disney+ Streaming Guide

Han, who sets on a rescue mission, boards the Sandcrawler and is shocked to see Boba Fett. The two former enemies work together to defeat the Jawas (no, really) until Fett regains his memory and takes a pot shot at Han. Han leaps to safety just as the Sandcrawler plummets into, you guessed it, the Sarlaac Pit. Wahh-wahh-wahhhhhh! What a strange little must-read story. First off, it featured the first post-Return of the Jedi appearance of Fett and, secondly, it then almost turned Fett into a kind of tragic hero before depositing him back into the same pit of death in which he met his ignominious film demise. One has to wonder if Marvel was under marching orders by Lucasfilm to make sure Fett stayed in the Sarlaac, and if so, what kind of plans did Lucas have for the fan favorite hunter killer back in 1984? And what about those killer Jawas. How are you not eBaying this right now?

Let’s move on to some alternate escapes from the Sarlaac Expanded Universe fiction, shall we? We have discussed Tales of the Bounty Hunters ad nauseam (and we will again), but now, let's take a look at Tales from Jabba’s Palace (1996), another Kevin J. Anderson-edited anthology. In "A Barve Like That: The Tale of Boba Fett" by J.D. Montgomery, readers get to experience Fett’s time in the Sarlaac. This short story features the most backstory that was ever revealed about the mysterious bounty hunter pre-Attack of the Clones, as fans are welcomed into Fett’s thoughts for the first time. Most of these thoughts consist of “Oh my lord, I’m slowly being digested over a period of a thousand years. It hurts. It hurts. Solo is a dick!” but there is also a great deal revealed about the heart and spirit of the hunter.

This tale mostly takes place within the Sarlaac, as a trapped Fett is able to converse with the Pit’s first victim, a being named Susejo. Through Susejo, Fett learns how hopeless his plight truly is—but guys, this is Boba Fett, the most lethal bounty hunter in the galaxy, a walking weapon, the first mail away action figure! Fett isn’t having any of that noise and tricks the Sarlaac into digesting his rocket pack. Well, Kenner was right, that backpack was dangerous, and when the thing explodes, Fett is freed of the Sarlaac. Pretty intense and much better than dying while fighting rabid Jawas. Montgomery’s tale really highlighted what Star Wars fans new all along—that nothing can stop Boba Fett, the most lethal bounty hunter in the galaxy.

Boba Fett is so badass he couldn’t even be stopped by the The Star Wars Holiday Special (1978). For real, the haphazardly animated nine-minute animated short featuring the introduction of Boba Fett is the only watchable part of the infamous Christmas special. In this short, Han Solo and Luke Skywalker fall victim to a sleeping virus and Chewbacca and the droids must team with a mysterious armored figure named Boba Fett to save the heroes.

Over the course of the stiffly animated feature, Fett fights a lizard dragon thing and is still a menacing presence despite the fact that he barley moves in this unbudgeted production. Now imagine, kids everywhere sending away for the Kenner figure and encountering Fett for the first time in the Christmas special. Even though the rest of the special is unwatchable, Fett’s animated debut must have been pure magic for Star Wars fans of a certain age. And that’s why we love Fett and his mystique, because his uniquely marketed pre-The Empire Strikes Back introduction into the Star Wars galaxy introduced the very idea of an Expanded Universe. Expect more Fett very soon, possibly in his own feature length film in the next few years.

Bossk

Bossk, possibly the most fearsome looking bounty hunter to gather on the Executor in The Empire Strikes Back, has long been an iconic but minor adversary in the Star Wars saga. Like Fett, Bossk was a Kenner mail away action figure, which just adds to the aura of this Trandoshan villain. Bossk is so tough, he doesn't have time for footwear, and his arms and legs barely fit into his famous yellow space suit. You just know that Bossk ripped apart some poor pilot to score his flight gear, and the lizard-like bounty hunter really pops in the few seconds he is onscreen in Empire.

Played by British actor Alan Harris, Bossk also pops up in Return of the Jedi and has appeared in many Expanded Universe tales. By the way, that Bossk’s famous space suit was a leftover costume used in the 1966 Doctor Who episode "The Tenth Planet Part 1" is pretty cool sci-fi synergy, huh?

Read More: 10 Emperor Palpatine Facts You Need to Know

To find our Bossk highlight, we look to the recent past and to the young adult Star Wars Rebels novel Ezra's Gamble by Ryder Windham (2014). Before this EU tale (which is part of the new Disney canon), Bossk was traditionally portrayed as an almost mindless, cannibalistic brute. While this has added to the infamous legend of Bossk, it didn’t leave room for character subtleties. Windham took care of all that by portraying the Trandoshan as a morally ambiguous hunter with a unique sense of honor.

In this recent prose Rebels adventure, Bossk is depicted as a reluctant anti-hero with a conflicting sense of right and wrong. Bossk helps Ezra Bridger and is presented to fans in a heroic light for the first time. But in Empire and in other Expanded Universe fiction, Bossk is a flesh-hungry monstrosity who uses his personal ship, the Hound’s Tooth, to track his prey across the galaxy. So whether you like the new, more complex Bossk or the slavering, blood hungry scum of yesteryear, you've got to admit that with a few short seconds on screen and one garbled line that almost caused ‘ol Admiral Piett to poop his Imperial trousers (Res luk ra'auf!), Bossk has long captured the imagination of Star Wars fans.

Zuckuss and 4-LOM

Before we delve into our final pair of bounty hunters, let us play the name game. When Kenner produced its last two bounty hunter action figures in 1982, the toy company made a bit of a boo boo. Kenner used the Zuckuss name for a character that was clearly a droid and used an alpha-numeric droid designation for a character that was clearly an alien. Yes, according to Kenner, 4-LOM was an alien and Zuckuss was a droid, but history now tells us that Kenner done screwed up. In recent years, 4-LOM has been correctly identified as the bug eyed droid aboard Vader’s Star Destroyer in Empire, and Zuckuss has become the robed, bug eyed alien and all is right with the galaxy.

But this name confusion just adds to the mystery of these two strange beings. The two bounty hunters in question appear in the same shot together and thus, have always been associated with each other. So when the two made their first appearance in the Expanded Universe, they did it as partners, as the Lenny and Squiggy of the Star Wars universe, but with an intense blood thirst and lots of guns. Before we delve into our 4-LOM and Zuckuss highlight, let us mention that 4-LOM was played by actress Cathy Munroe while Zuckuss was played by Chris Parsons (who also played the white protocol droid that appeared on Hoth, K-3PO—because if we’re going to go SW obscure, we might as well take it all the way to the extreme).

Okay, of course our 4-LOM and Zuckuss tale comes from Tales of the Bounty Hunters because quite frankly, neither of these scums has made many Expanded Universe appearances. You would have thought that with their really awesome costumes 4-LOM and Zuckuss would have popped up in Jabba’s Palace in Return of the Jedi, but nope, it was one and done for this pair of assassins.

Read More: Star Wars Episode IX Predictions

In the Tales of the Bounty Hunters story, "Of Possible Futures: The Tale of Zuckuss and 4-LOM" by M. Shayne Bell, fans learn the complex histories of both of these blink and you’ll miss ‘em bounty hunters. 4-LOM and Zuckuss ambush a group of Rebels as the freedom fighters are attempting to escape Hoth during the first act of The Empire Strikes Back. The pair planned to sell the captives to Vader and the Empire.

During the mission, fans learn of the background of both bug-eyed bounty hunters. 4-LOM was once a simple protocol droid whose programming became compromised. At first, 4-LOM began stealing from passengers of a luxury liner he worked on and before long became proficient in all sorts of mayhem. Eventually, 4-LOM embarked on a career as a thief and a bounty hunter and became so infamous, that even IG-88 considered recruiting 4-LOM into the droid revolution but thought better of it because the former protocol droid’s personality was too unstable.

As for Zuckuss, this diminutive killer was a member of the Gand species, a group of insectoid aliens that breathed pneumonia and had to wear specially-made breathing apparatuses or suffocate in oxygen rich atmospheres. Gands also used special chemicals called the Mists to help them reach precognitive trance states. Whether Zuckuss really had mystical powers or just kind of got high and hunted people is unclear, but it was clear that this alien and droid made a formidable pair.

In Bell’s tale, Zuckuss and 4-LOM are also shown to have a sound moral compass as, after the bounty hunting duo capture the Rebels, they free them and help the fugitives escape the Empire. So there you have it, according to the now out of continuity Expanded Universe tale, two of our infamous bounty hunters in question possessed the heart of heroes even though they looked like things that crawled out of an H.R. Giger fever dream.

Most of these Expanded Universe tales are now expelled from the Star Wars canon, but the wonder that surrounds these six bounty hunters remains. As we move towards countless more Star Wars films, books, comics, and cartoons, you can be assured that these six characters that captured fans imaginations in about six seconds will continue to fascinate Star Wars fans of every age. Happy hunting.

Marc Buxton is a freelance contributor. You can read more of his work here.

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Marc Buxton

Nov 13, 2019

Star Wars

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astudyinimagination · 7 years ago

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orelseatlastsheunderstoodit replied to your post “Reblog if you’re a Star Wars fan and you know the phrase Mahn uhl...”

I don't recognize it exactly. Like I can't say where it's from. But it seems like 'may the force be with you'? With words taken from German and deliberately misspelled?

I’m sorry, I kept forgetting to reply to this! You’re absolutely correct on (probably) both counts!

Did you ever read the Tales from anthologies from the ‘90s? Mos Eisley Cantina, Jabba’s Palace, Bounty Hunters, the Empire, the New Republic? "Mahn uhl Fharth bey ihn valle” was from that last one, a story called “Uhl Eharl Khoehng,” and the phrase is Old Corellian. (In that story, Old Corellian definitely borrows from German, although other stories don’t seem to know about that and make the language look... like your standard sci-fi-esque language, you know what I mean?)

Anyway, I never read much of the Tales anthologies, but this particular short story I devoured, and it always stuck with me. Probably because the protagonist, Fable Astin, is a female Jedi-in-training during the Empire, and story focuses almost exclusively on her. Even though it ended bittersweetly, I still loved it (and wanted to write fix-it fic).

And I always absolutely adored the aesthetic of the phrase.

#orelseatlastsheunderstoodit #replies #Star Wars Legends #SW EU #Star Wars #Uhl Eharl Khoehng #Mahn uhl Fharth bey ihn valle

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justastormie · 8 years ago

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@thiswaycomessomethingwicked Did someone say STAR WARS BOOK RECS? 8D!!!

WELCOME TO THUNDERDOME.

I hate to admit, there aren’t any Tarkin-centric books I really like. Tarkin is OK but I feel like it misses the mark in capturing his old school menace. The voices are all great but the empire comes off much more as a…military rationalist colonial power than I’d prefer. Which isn’t a bad read of the empire, just not the one I prefer. (My favorite is more the unstable, late medici-eqsue power struggle with a little sci-fi magic for flavor.) Also the plot is…Meh.

Tbf most SW plots are Meh.

Now there’s one series I recommended without reservation, it hasn’t got the Grand Moff but it has some other great baddies. The Mandalorian Armor series by K.W. Jeter. It’s AMAZING. Watch two trashcan human beings follow around my favorite mandalorian trashcan. You have Dengar; the burnt cinnamon roll, should not have to put up with this shit even if he gets himself into most of it. Neela; looks like will kill you and will definitely kill you. It’s her story that drives the narrative and it’s gr9. This one time dancing girl will FUCK YOUR SHIT UP. Other dodgy bounty hunters for days. Prince Xizor brings you Wow, I’m Rooting For This Scumbag. This series really captures the sprawling nature of the SW universe and serves as a great entry point. Did i mention awesome aliens? And a solid fucking plot? Some of the best written action scenes in any book ever. It’s only three books which is nice.

Even nicer, like a crack dealer I always have an extra copy of book one sitting around to give to people. Literally anyone can hit me up and I will ship it to you, no joke. It’s not only the best SW series it’s just great sci-fi. And a great series for anybody who likes scum and villainy type characters.

Newer books I recommend:

The Weapon of a Jedi by Jason Fry, technically kids book but it’s good Luke Content. Fun, breezy read with a cool story.

Before the Awakening by Greg Rucka also a kids book, but also a great read. Fun, easy read with lots of good character stuff. As always I trust Greg Rucka with all the things and he does not disappoint.

Battlefront: Twilight Company by Alexander Freed. NOT a kid’s book. If you liked the Rogue One cast of rebels you’ll love these assholes. Similar themes to Rogue One in general.

Republic Commando series by Karen Traviss. (this is technically in the “Legacy” category now, but they were written pretty recently) I only have two major complaints with this series. One of them is not Traviss’ fault because they wouldn’t give her Boba Fett and the other one is it needed more women. I started out with what i didn’t like so I could look remotely objective. I love this series. This series is fucking LIFE. Traviss did her military research and it SHOWS. It will clear your skin, renew your crops and save your soul. It will rip your heart out, stomp on it and laugh. The series also operates on the Pterry principle that you can read the first book if you want to for completion’s sake, but if you wanna start with a Great Book you can jump right to #2. Personally I love the first one, but I know a lot of people found it a little slow. Fair warning; Traviss and Lucasfilm got into a fight before she could finish the series. It ends at a stopping point but you will be screaming in frustration. (i am literally getting a tattoo from this series my dudes, it’s quality AF)

Older books I recommend:

Tales from the....Mos Eisley’s Cantina/Bounty Hunters/Empire/New Republic by a whole bunch of people. Each book is a collection of short stories. Some of them are terrible, but some of them are really great and worth the time. They also show up in used bookstores all the time.

Truce at Bakura by Kathy Tyers. Immediate post-script to ROTJ, just some good star warsy shit.

The “Thrawn Triology” actually titled Heir to the Empire series. I’m pretty sure I get kicked out of fandom if i don’t recc this. It’s Thrawn. He’s cool. There are lots of other cool people. I’m not crazy about how he writes the trio but his OCs make up for it in spades.

The Adventures of Lando Calrissian by L. Neil Smith. Now this depends on your tastes. This is a collection of three smaller books, and i love ‘em because they are full on Space Fantasy Ridiculousness. It’s Noir In Space. A dirtier Flash Gordon. Lando at his scoundrel best.

books to avoid like the plague:

Legacy of the Force series. Just oh god run. RUN. HEED THE WARNINGS OF THOSE WHO FELL BEFORE YOU. Fails so hard at everything. They took a good idea and fucked it right up. If you absolutely feel like you have to dive into this morass of bullshit, just read the Traviss books. They are marginally less painful. Marginally.

The Courtship of Princess Leia by Dave Wolverton. Literally the worst. Renown for being both a literary and sexist piece of trash.

Darth Plagueis by James Luceno. Listen. I know it sounds cool. I know you’ll crack it open and go ‘huh this writing’s alright. how back can it be’. You’ll make it a few chapters. You’ll be underwhelmed but hey, why not finish it. Just don’t. Put it down. Walk outside. Enjoy your life. Don’t maroon yourself in this tepid bullshit. For such a badass subject this is SO. GODDAMN. BORING. I know you want a history of the Sith my friend, but this is not the book for it.

Sadly there just aren’t that many good SW books. There are a lot more quality comics, but I’m not sure if you’re into that.

#mun rambles #so so much #mun has a lot of star wars feelings #they say in a darth vader tshirt

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hardcheapknock-blog · 7 years ago

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We did it! We passed the time for 50 days by providing memorable Star Wars related content for you the humble and gorgeous viewer(s). Holy craps what a ride. Well, we are on day zero and probably have seen or are seeing The Last Jedi as we speak. So for now here is some bonus goodness from some of our beloved authors before we go on a much needed holiday hiatus and Last Jedi binge. See you in 2018!

Gundy

The Audacity of A New Hope

Our 50-Day Countdown was really tough. What really surprised me about my performance during the countdown is I never really ran into a creative block. My biggest challenge was finding the time to do what I wanted in the time allotted. If it became clear that I would not have enough time to create the post I wanted, I somehow found a way to post something faster to buy myself extra time.

Each of us had to publish every four days, and with each other as our own best critics, the posts had to be solid. JERMAINE SOLID.

Sometimes an idea hit me and I had it turned around in 24 hours: “Rey Mind Trick“, “Midichlorox“, and “Chalmun’s Cantina Sippy Cups” are good examples of this. One post, “‘Made To Suffer’ by Guest Artist Edvard Munch“, actually happened by accident and I just followed it to the new conclusion which was really fun!

The Red Arm Diaries

C-3PO’s red arm was a source of hilariousness for me. It’s absurd how it is introduced, made to be an object of mystery and speculated upon, and then by the end of The Force Awakens, replaced with the normal, gold arm.

I’d planned to focus almost entirely on the Red Arm in a series called “The Red Arm Diaries”. This would include equally-absurd theories of how the red arm came to be. Yes, I am aware that the real story behind the red arm is out there to be discovered, but the average movie-goer isn’t going to do that. I had planned to create one-page vignettes around what transpired between Episode 6 and 7 that could account for the red arm.

In the end, I only did one comic, “Reunite Us, Interruptus“. I’m not sure if I got tired of drawing old Goldenrod or just lost faith in the idea. The other ideas that I did make a priority are still things I’m very happy with. In general, I just wish I’d done more comics.

The Reject Pile

Here are some ideas I decided NOT to do…

“The Red Missile”

I had the idea for a short comic where “Holiday Special” Boba Fett’s backpack missile kept getting him in trouble whenever he wanted to rent a creature to ride – by accidentally firing and choking them. So he’d have a reputation for just being a lousy customer and not the bounty hunter everyone fears him as.

In starting the research, it made me really sad to hear about all of the incidents in the 70s that led to toys no longer being able to fire missiles on which children can choke. So I scrapped that idea. I really wanted to make that pop culture reference work, but not on the backs of dead children. Well, this time.

“The Shortest Fan Cut of ANH”

I thought it would be funny to show how simple things would be if R2-D2 had simply started flying as he did in Attack of the Clones but in A New Hope.

So, the droids land of Tatooine… C-3PO mounts up on R2, they bypass the jawas and the Lars farm and simply fly to Obi Wan’s hermit hut. They fly to Mos Eisley and hire Han and Chewie AND they are able to arrive on Alderaan before it blows up! Later, they simply mount a bomb on him and send him into the exhaust port, flying, kamikaze-style. The end.

“A Christmas Falcon”

I have a lot of great photos from my childhood, opening Star Wars toys on Christmas morning, wearing Star Wars pajamas. I just couldn’t think of a way to make that slice of nostalgia into a post.

Yeah! The Imperial Troop Transport!

Christmas Falcon! PJs!

Whoa, how did this get in there!

Thanks for reading!

Samson

It really doesn’t surprise me anymore about how much back story can be created pertaining to the most random stuff in A New Hope. Case in point, the large skeleton of some beast that roamed the Dune Sea of Tatooine, which 3PO just happened to walk by, in search of rescue. I don’t know when they first started calling it a Krayt Dragon. It must have be a while back ago, cause when I was looking up images of the skeleton, I knew to look up “Krayt Dragon.” Apparently they are the apex predators of Tatooine. Too bad we didn’t see a living one in the film take down a Bantha or some Jawas.

My problem isn’t so much with all the back story stuff, be it official or fan fiction. My problem is with all the art being created hypothesizing what the creature actually looked like in the flesh. All the renderings pretty much show a traditional, elongated dragon head complete with horns around the back of the head. Even Terryl Whitlatch, who designed a lot of the creatures for Episode I, drew her dragon with fairly long snout. I really love the illustration, but that skull just doesn’t match the source material. If you look at the skull in the film, it’s a stubby head with no horns. It almost looks like a Camarasaurus (sauropod dinosaur) head, but with pointy, needle teeth. The only illustration that comes close to the skeleton on film is a painting by Ralph McQuarrie depicting two sand people hunting a Krayt Dragon. I think it was part of the original pitch art he created for Uncle George, but I’m not entirely sure about that. It may have been done much later for some book, regardless the head on this dragon looks rather stubby. Either way, there sure is a crap load of stuff for a background skeleton that only appears for a few seconds on screen. But that’s the appeal of Star Wars. All these little details, bringing the world to life, that people will obsess over and latch onto… even 40 years later.

FlippyCrap™®

Counting down origin

Well a quick tale of truth is 2 years ago I decided to countdown the days till The Force Awakens by myself despite Phil Collin’s song Against All Odds. Well take a look at me now Phil! I started at 100. That’s one more bottle of beer on the wall per the song and I don’t even drink! And without any preparation or knowledge of Star Wars(lie). Yeah in retrospect it was a crazy venture seeing how there is life. But I went with it. Using facebook as my vehicle of display, each day I posted something new. In the beginning it was just me googling the hell out of SW related items and trying to find the funniest or most interesting ones. But then I started to actually create my own. It seemed more ownable and frankly the kids (7-12 friends) loved it.

Some of those “classic” ones were inserted into this countdown because dammit I could do what I want. Those were The Star Wars Halloween Special (day 45) and Thanksgiving message from the bounty hunters (Day 22). But the rest were new, fresh and stupid! Just don’t forget to tell Kanjiklub!

So short, long story brief, my colleagues at HardCheapKnock decided to do one together for The Last Jedi. This way it was not as daunting with multi folks on it. In truth it still was tough but we frickin’ did it!

Writers notes

Some of the inspiration behind my posts:

Yoda’s Suffering (day 35) – this was intended to be a message about the struggles of children in Uganda. You should read about it on the web if you have time.

Not again Threepio NSFE (day 35) – again about Uganda

Walrus Man Discount Replacement Limb or Other Club (day 2) – This one took about a month to do. Mainly the drawings of every body and part. Actually I had this mostly done before we even started the countdown. Just tweaking it along the way.

Utini Speeder Wreckers (day 15) – This was a homage to a local CHICAGO TV commercial from the early 90’s. Took about 2 weeks to do. And if you think the quality looks shitty that was the intention so wah! Here are some clean behind the scenes photos then jerks.

Anyways God bless you if you sneezed within the hour (otherwise this is void). And God bless Star Wars.

As a reminder although the countdown is over you have 11 more days to enter the: LAST JEDI COUNTDOWN CONTEST! We are giving away a $100 Dollar Fandango Gift Card!!! We know you are going to see The Last Jedi…so we want to buy your second, third or fourth viewings! So it’s quite easy to play. You can do one or all of the following for a chance to win:

Visit Hard Cheap Knock on Facebook

Follow @hardcheapknock on Twitter

Post a tweet

List the hidden numbers you found throughout the countdown – HINT there are 7 of them!

All of the above options must be activated through the fancy little entry form below:

Entry-Form

The more options you do the more your chance of winning increases! Enter today through December 25, 2017. Must be 18 years old to play and be a resident of the USA. For full official rules click here.

0 Days to The Last Jedi! We did it! We passed the time for 50 days by providing memorable Star Wars related content for you the humble and gorgeous viewer(s).

#50 Days of Star Wars #creatures #illustration #Last Jedi #Star Wars #The Last Jedi

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