#I promise I’ll start making real art eventually

[victorckk]

First art post of 2025!! And half of it is shitpost stuff

[miguelhugger2099]

What a Man!

Summary: Your past experiences with other men had left you with scars. Scars that show in your lovely relationship with Miguel. Art by AndalusiaLu on twt <<Prev

Miguel x GN!Reader, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Drabble

It had been quite a few months since your relationship with Miguel had blossomed into something beautiful and real. He really was different from everyone else and you couldn’t be luckier. Miguel would often disagree, he thought he was the lucky one to end up with someone like you. Kind, intelligent and headstrong as well as so loving. You were the prettiest package to him. You tried your very best not to screw things up. You don’t know what you’d do if you said something or did something to make Miguel not want you anymore. So you remained diligent, making sure that Miguel was happy with you and that he stayed happy. Despite your best efforts to hide the ugly side of you, it managed to creep in the more you were with Miguel. It became harder to hide, slipping through the cracks of the facade you kept up. It started with him arriving home late. Miguel at some point had asked you to live with him, which you declined and eventually settled on visiting and having sleepovers at his place as a compromise. It was still technically early in the relationship. At first when he would come home late, you’d be worried sick wondering if this was good for his health or if he’d get home safely when he’s so tired. Miguel would trug through the door and you’d be at his side as soon as you heard the click. His tired eyes brightened seeing you, wrapping his arms around your waist and trying not to rest his entire body weight on you. “I’m sorry I kept you waiting.” He murmured in your hair, one arm around your waist and the other going around your shoulders. He breathed in the smell of your shampoo and lotion, his body nearly melting on top of you. You returned his hug with a tight squeeze, the worry in your heart subsiding and replaced with a warm feeling. “It’s okay. I wanted to stay up to see you.” You snuggled closer to his shoulder, his cologne gone after a hard day's work and only leaving a lingering smell along with his natural scent. “No, no, that’s not right. I don’t want you to get big ugly giant eyebags like me. You’re too gorgeous.” Miguel lifts his head up and stares down at you, sleepiness evident in his eyes but his will to see and feel you are stronger. You smile softly and reach up to cup his cheek which he leans into. “I think your eyebags add character.” You giggle and he chuckles along with you. “Really. I don’t mind.”

Miguel’s hands go down to squeeze your hips. “Well I mind. You deserve proper rest. C’mere, off to bed. I’ll join you in a bit.” He takes your hand in his larger one and leads you to his bedroom. What was once very plain and sleek now had little trinkets of your things around like your hairbrush, your favorite candles and a half empty water bottle. Hell, even a new blanket Miguel had bought you along with some extra clothes and pajamas. You practically lived here. After Miguel had washed up in the shower, he joined you in bed, collecting you in his arms and running his hands up and down your back. He asked you about your day, what you had done, what you bought with his credit card–none, you told him– and any other things he might’ve missed when he was off at work. While you listed things off, Miguel listened with an attentive small smile. He focused on the way your lips moved, how your eyes looked up at the walls in thought and how your hands played with his chest hairs. Before falling asleep, he promised one thing. “I’ll do my best to come back home to you.” To your demise, Miguel continued to come home late. Each time he'd come home late he would apologize in any way possible. In kisses, extra cuddling time even when he’s exhausted and showering you in gifts. None of it was enough when he was gone most days and you only got maybe an hour with him before falling asleep. He was one of the top geneticists in his field, most likely number one. He was bound to be busy and needed everywhere. He can’t help it, you told yourself. It’s a taxing job. He’s not doing this on purpose. So why does it leave a sour taste in your mouth? Why does it bother you so much?

You grew anxious. Why couldn’t he just ask for more days off? Why is he so busy? What was the point of him finding a partner when he’s just too occupied from his job? You began to feel alone. His kisses started to feel weak, cuddling time was cut short and the gifts meant nothing after each apology. You tried pushing those thoughts aside. You were acting spoiled. Miguel basically threw his money and love at you and you’re taking it for granted. How selfish can you be? He’d be furious to know you’re using him like this–taking his gifts and whining about it. What if he’s lying? What if the job is just an excuse? Was there someone else? Is that why he’s going to bed faster? A few pecks on the lips before he passes out? Oh, how could you think that of him? He’s been nothing but burned out and trying his best. What would he do if he knew what you were thinking? He can’t. He won’t. So you do what you know best: you shut down. Your inner emotions conflicted with one another. One berating you and the other trying to convince you. You sucked up all your spilling emotions when Miguel came home late again. You met him at the door like always but this time a little slower, more hesitant.

Miguel drops his bag by the door like usual, taking off his coat and placing it down on a chair seat before looking at you. Like always, his eyes brighten up and he brings you in his arms for a hug. He feels himself recharge with you in his embrace but you just feel uncomfortable. The weight of your thoughts and feelings rest heavy in your chest and you slowly wrap your arms around him, resting your head on his chest and hoping to feel some comfort again. “I’ve missed you so much.” You hear Miguel mumble. “I know I keep saying this but I’m really sorry for coming home so late these days. You know I’d rather be here than anywhere else.” “Yeah. I’m sure you do.” You mumble bluntly before slipping out of his arms. Miguel feels his heart drop and confusion overshadow his exhaustion. He watches your back afterwards and there’s nothing he hates more than seeing you walking away from him. “What’s that supposed to mean?” He chases after you, walking behind you as you walk into the kitchen to grab a glass of water. “Nothing.” You sigh and it’s quiet between you two except for the tap water running and filling your glass. Miguel’s eyebrows furrow. He can feel something’s wrong with you but he doesn’t know what. Did someone say something to you? “What’s wrong? Did you have a bad day at work?” He crosses his arms and leans back on the counter next to you. He notices how you purposefully look away from him, settling on just sipping from your cup. “No.” “Did someone say something to you?” “No.” “Did I do something?” “No.” You said more quickly this time. “Then can you tell me what’s wrong?” Miguel reaches out his arm to try and turn your cheek to face him but you shrug off his touch.

“I said nothing, Miguel.” You feel yourself grow irritated. You wanted to spill but you knew it would only lead to bad things. You didn’t want to start an argument and have it spiral into more arguments that would inevitably ruin your relationship. You take a few steps away from him until you hear Miguel call your name sternly. You pause in your tracks and for a moment, there’s fear. Is he going to yell? Miguel had never yelled at you but you’ve been yelled at before when being…difficult like this. You felt your heart start picking up speed and you held onto your glass tightly. You hear him call your name again, softly this time, but you still hear it as yelling. Miguel touches your arm and you quickly flinch, turning around and taking a step back. You look up at him, an apology about to drop from your lips. “I’m sor–” Your breath hitches. “Did I do something wrong?” He repeats again. Oh, he noticed your tone. “No, I’m–I’m sorry.” Miguel’s eyes soften, a knowing look as he tilts his head and says your name gently, coaxing the truth out of you. “Talk to me, cariño.” He whispers, now both heads coming up to cup your cheeks. You don’t know what to do. It was a risk to talk about what was bothering you, even as small as him coming home late, but it meant a lot to you. You miss him. You take the risk with a shake of your hands. “I…You come home late,” You start off slowly and he waits patiently. “It’s too much for me. Well… maybe not too much, I know how hard you work but it–” You take a deep breath. “It’s not enough. I miss you. I want to see you for more than just a couple hours in the morning and at night. I just want you to be here and I’m sorry if that sounds clingy of me, but it’s how I feel.” You feel your chest tighten up and look down, unable to meet his eyes and failing to see his face crumble. Miguel takes the glass from your hands and places it beside you on the counter. “C’mere.” He whispers, bringing you in a hug again. “And you promised me so it just feels extra bad, y’know? I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” You bury yourself in his arms. Miguel shushed you. “Don’t apologize. I should be the one apologizing.” “But you did–you have–” “And yet here we are. I made you cry.” You didn’t notice the way your tone got more nasally or how you hiccuped and sniffled–all of your tears getting soaked up by his collared shirt. “Are you mad?” You ask. Miguel pulls away to wipe away your tear stained cheeks.

“Jesus, no I’m not mad. How could I be mad at you?” You sniffle when his thumb swipes across your cheekbone. “Sweetheart, why didn’t you tell me this earlier?” You shrugged. “You promised and I just…I dunno. I felt like it wasn’t my place to tell you to work less just because I felt lonely.” You try to look away but Miguel doesn’t let you. “I don’t know any other way to tell you this but you are equally as important as my job–maybe even more. You never mentioned that this was bothering you. I could’ve asked for less hours.” “I didn’t want you to get mad at me or think I’m spoiled.” “Baby, it’s my job to spoil you.” Miguel smiles and playfully pinches your cheeks, making you mutter a small ‘ow’ and grin. “I’ve just been taking so much time because everyone there looks at me for answers and advice and other bullshit so they make me oversee everything. But if you want me home, then I’ll come home. Just say the word and I’ll do anything you ask of me.” His tone is soft, as soft as it can be with his deep voice. “That’s a lot of power.” You joke. “It’s yours. I’m yours.” He leans his forehead on yours. “So you’re not mad?” “Not even a little.” “And you’re gonna be coming home earlier?” “Starting tomorrow.” Your smile widens. “Are you sure this is okay? I don’t want you doing things just because I said so.” Your smiles wavers and you slide your arms around his neck. Miguel leans down to pepper kisses along your cheeks, wanting to see you smile more. “Trust me, this is more than okay. A gift even! A couple less hours of work to spend time with the most beautiful, stunning, outstanding, and amazing person in the entire world.” With each compliment, he leaves a giant kiss to your cheeks, forehead, nose and even your chin.

The next day, Miguel comes home way earlier than usual, just when the sun is setting. With more energy than before, he picks you up in his arms and lifts you off the ground after dropping his things to the floor. He runs to the bedroom with you in a fit of laughter, the sound making his heart drum against his chest. He jumps in bed with you, his weight nearly crushing you but you still laugh anyway. “Stop! No outside clothes on the bed!” Miguel smothers you with his lips. “We can clean the sheets later. Let me finally spend time with you.”

[adventures-in-the-mad-forest]

Voice Acting Volunteer Info

Taglist: @canvas-the-florist @awkwardqueercreature @bananaconda33 @prince-rowan-of-the-forest @bluebellieart

@dewberrybramble @strange-destinations @thewickedcompanion @duck-in-a-spaceship @kitkat4406

@general-kalani @astrowillscreamintothevoid

Kofi blog post (All the same information is located under the read more).

Please ensure that you read and understand this before signing up! If you have any questions, please ask!

Summary of the Podcast:

It's about Glacie, and their coworkers, who work at the Meeting Point. The Meeting Point is a restaurant/shop located near the Mad Forest. Coming back from a pretty long break, due to their own unreality problems popping up, Glacie is warned that the forest grows hungry. After some incidents, Glacie's hallucinations start getting real bad, and they eventually venture forth into the Mad Forest.

Content Warnings of this Podcast Include (but are not limited to):

Unreality

Ableism

Pain

Blood

Implied Death

Podcast Genre

Modern-ish (emphasis on the ish) fantasy horror/action

Some things to note:

This is Volunteer Work, while I will be doing my best to pay you all, I can not promise that this will happen.

You Must Be 18+ to Volunteer to Voice Act (Mainly due to the workload)

You do not need prior Voice Acting work to throw your hat in the ring! That is not going to be a factor in the form or a question I ask in the Zoom meeting

The form that goes out today is to schedule a Zoom Meeting where you’ll do your audition then on the characters that you selected that you want to attempt to Voice Act. You can try for multiple characters, and say how many you’d like to Voice Act for (maximum of 3 characters). Fill out the days and times you are generally available. We can schedule a specific date based on schedules two weeks before the meeting. (It is important to note that the form times are in MST, as I live in Arizona in the United States. That is UTC -7. Please convert to your time zone before saying you’re available.)

I’m going to state this again so it’s not too buried: Zoom meetings are when auditions will be held, I’ll be starting to schedule those in November and December, at least 2 weeks ahead of when I first email you!

One social media is required for me to credit you in the podcast officially! You may have up to three, (this is mainly so that intros aren’t too long). Yes, I will be annoying about this.

You may only work up to 20 hours per week on Voice Acting. Including practice and breaks of less than 1 hour. This is to ensure that, if money is made, I can pay you back for your time fairly without you overworking yourself for essentially no pay if no money is made from this.

Speaking of Making Money off of this

How am I attempting to do that? You’d be right to ask. Currently, early versions of the unedited script are available for early viewing for $6 each, and a bundle is available for $35 total. Only the first episode is free in the unedited version so that those who are unsure of their interest can find out if it’s their cup of tea or not! These are also currently on a 25% sale, as I'm about to get the edited script going up for early access within the next few days.

With the edited version, the first two episodes will be free for early viewing (since most of the main characters show up by that episode it will give a better idea of who they are), however the rest will be priced at $12/episode with a bundle available for $60.

95% of those funds will be going to back paying volunteers for this project. 5% will be for extra fees that may arise as we get further into the process of recording, editing, and uploading. (This is after Stripe takes out their fee).

There are also memberships available for anyone interested in supporting the podcast!

I also sell my own art on the side and will be opening up commissions! For these I will be putting 75% of the funds into payment, with the other 25% (after the stripe fee) going towards making more art.

Not only that, but after Voice Actors are picked, I will start building a kickstarter for the project that is planned to release in May or June. This is to give us time to record 1 or 2 episodes to share bloopers and behind the scenes with backers. As the max amount of time a kickstarter can be up is 60 days, I will be doing a lot of advertising for it when the time comes on different blogs. While I would recommend you share the kickstarter on different social medias too, it’s not a requirement. And it’s something I will be discussing in more depth with the podcast team.

How Will I Pay You if the podcast makes money?

If you have a kofi, I will be leaving some generous tips! If not, any app that takes card as payment (without me having to make an account) will do! I am not doing checks, as this is open to volunteers from around the world who speak english, and even if it was just the US, I’m scared that they might get lost in the mail!

If you don’t have a place I can pay you with a debit card, please be willing to find a way to do that before you fill out the form.

I am willing to teach you how to set up a kofi if you need help with that!

You will be paid back at $15USD/hour if this podcast starts making money

Again, this is not guaranteed! Voice Acting will be considered Volunteer Work unless money is made!

Now let’s get into the Available Characters for Season 1

Main Characters: 

Cameron - She/her, Cis, lesbian, works at the Meeting Point. Cameron is wonderful, she’s independent, but terrified of being alone. She’s sassy and protective, but she’d do anything for her friends.

Shaun - He/him Cishet, coolest straight guy you’ll ever meet. Gives everyone nicknames, even if they don’t stick. Doesn’t like being serious without room for whimsy, he enjoys having fun. Honestly, he’s just a silly guy.

Dwayne - He/him, transmasc, pansexual, aromantic. Single dad of two (Laila and Deon). Is doing his best to provide for his kids and give them the best life they can possibly have. Ms. Lemona is his babysitter, both of them feeling as if they owe the other for the help they provide each other.Priority for this role is for someone who is black and transmasc

Gerry - He/him, Cis, aroace. 19 years old, youngest member of the Meeting Point. He’s just been hired to work there and is finding his place, is closest with Dwayne at this point. Has a habit of calling Glacie boss for some reason (no he is not being forced to.)Priority for this role is for someone who is brown.

Side Characters:

Delmena - She/her, Cishet. Widow. She’s an older woman who uses a wheelchair. While she’s outfitted her house to be more accessible to her, the outside world isn’t as put together. This is why she hired Carmelita, a helper who lives with her but is mainly asked to do anything that requires going outside and dealing with jutting sidewalk, no pavement, things like that. While Delmena will go with her most times, sometimes she enjoys staying at home and doing things herself.

Carmelita - She/her, Transfem, Lesbian. Works as Delmena’s stay at home caregiver, while Delmena doesn’t need her most of the time, both of them provide wonderful company for each other. She recently (ish) moved to the area, after struggling to find a job in the bigger town of Campeal. Priority for this role is for someone who is Hispanic/Latina and transfem

Haeyl - She/her, Transfem, Straight. Shaun’s dogsitter, pretty mysterious. But she has a right to be. Wonderful to be around, Mellon (the dog) loves her, and she loves dogsitting for Mellon.Priority for this role is for someone who is black and transfem.

Laila - 8 years old, she/her. Dwayne’s daughter, and eldest child. She’s loves to tease her brother, and take his toys as she’s taller than him (she gives them back, she just likes to frustrate her brother). Really interested in dragons and magic, one of which she’s told doesn’t exist; the other one she hasn’t gotten a clear answer on.Priority for this role is someone who is black.

Deon - 6 years old, he/him. Enjoys trains and magnets, and is also interested in magic. Is tired of Laila stealing his toys and keeping them from him. Has a habit of accidentally leaving toys out on the floor, which caused the incident that happened to keep Dwayne from being in the first episode of the season.Priority for this role is for someone who is black.

Ms. Lemona - She/her, transfem, Laila and Deon’s babysitter as Dwayne works at the Meeting Point to provide for them. She enjoys watching these kids, and teaching them new things, even astounding them with the creations she makes. She’s a woodworker, and knows some basics on how to make some more mechanical bits and bobs.Priority for this role is for someone who is black.

Other Characters:

Glacie’s Guide - A hallucination of sorts, not much is known about it, but it claims in the beginning of Season 2 to be there to help Glacie navigate through the forest. (Although whether that is true or not remains to be seen).

Various Background Characters

This includes customers at the Meeting Point as well as, random chatter that is unintelligible in certain parts of the episode.

Audition Information

I have chosen lines for each character that I believe gives a good view of who they are!

See this google doc for those:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/19LNLDZgUOYPCCF6i8nH2iQrXe5UXK-S_nJGmqJ-Hzvc/edit?usp=sharing

If you'd like access to the full script before viewing, DM me on tumblr!

Forms open today, and I will begin scheduling auditions as early as Early November/Early December! As auditions happen, I will begin casting in Late December/Early January, because of this, if there’s someone you’d like to play I suggest getting the form in early. I will Not recast a part unless someone drops out so do not ask! As people are cast, I will be editing the form to reflect this.

How does casting work?

I will be attempting to schedule zoom meetings to cast specific characters on specific days. After the last zoom meeting for a character is done, and there are no scheduled zoom meetings for this character for a week, I will contact the person who got the role and give them the link to the discord server with information on what role they got. Then I will be removing said role from the form. This will continue until all roles have been filled.

I will also be contacting those who didn’t get the role to let them know that they didn’t get the role.

I would recommend, trying out as many roles as you’re interested in! While you can be cast for multiple roles, depending on how many people audition, roles will be 1 per person with the exception of background roles.

The various background roles will have between 2-5 people voicing those characters, and due to the amount of lines, only count as 1 extra role!

Joining the discord server is mandatory for Voice Actors! This is because I have things set up to record in the discord server itself.

Any questions? Feel free to ask!

Voice Acting Volunteer Scheduling and Sign Up Form:

[marengogo]

Rambling in INFJese - Part 10: Queerful In South Korea

SGMB and RPWP focused playlist

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

🐺 — 🐺 — 🐺—

Gurls, Bois and Enbies … Hellooooooooooo 📢 Yes, I’m finally, officially, back from my travels.

Am I feeling relaxed and refreshed?

NO.

In fact, I’m pretty sure I’m more tired than when I left 😬. You see, there was more excitement than I thought, or even budgeted for, but, lowkey highkey I knew it was going to turn out like that, so, it was what it was and it was unforgettable 😊💜. 

Now, on to the topic of today!

As the title kinda spoils, I would like to bring forth the topic of queerness in present day Korea, touching upon specific sub-subjects within this main-theme, which you will discover as you keep reading.

In order to provide more context and understanding, I’ll have to bring up a bit of Geography, a tad of Politics and a lot of History, and let me make this clear, even though I have been out of politics for quite some time I used to be very invested in world politics … I am presently indeed somewhat annoyed, because there seems to be a lot of misinformation that has been going around with regards to what it might mean to be gay/queer person in South Korea, in the big year of 2024, which is why I’d also like to encourage us to be proactive and do some research, on our own, with the available resources that are out there. I know it sounds heavy, but I promise I’ll try and make it as least cumbersome, and as much relatable to what might concern all Queer people, and JK and JM of course, as possible ✌🏾.

Let’s start with some Geography.

Asia … is a big ass continent. Because it is so big, amongst the people who make these kind of decisions, it was decided that this continent would have to be divided into 5 regions: Central, East, South, Southeast and West. The regions we are going to be concerned with are East and Southeast also known as ASEAN. The East has a total of 8 countries, out of which we are going to focus on 4 being; China, Japan, South Korea and Taiwan, while the Southeast has a total of 11, out of which we are only going to concentrate on 1, being Thailand … aaand that was all for Geography; painless right?

Great. So now it is time for some of History. We are now going to be talking about the history of the BL genre and the Queer art genre within two particular cultures; Eastern and Western.

BL, otherwise known as Boy’s Love, is a genre that was born in Japan in the 1970s. To properly discuss the world of BL it would take way too many blogs, so I’m afraid I won’t delve too deep into it, but in order to proceed with our discourse I need for everyone to at least understand the substantial difference between, for example, a series like The Eight Sense and Heartstopper. The first is a BL and the other is a Queer Coming-of-Age Drama. These two series are the I most point out very positive outcome of a lot of struggle and progress within both the BL and Queer art genre through the years.

The East and BLs - BL was created by women to be consumed by other women in Japan. It had nothing to do with creating content for gay/queer people, and this is very fundamental for everyone to understand. The thing is that it doesn’t matter where in the world you are, if you are or were a girl/woman you know the struggles are real. Different parts of the world deal with this frustration in different ways, and Japan and eventually the other 4 Asian countries I listed above found this to be one of them. The BL genre is basically having two men in a forbidden relationship, driven by mad passion, and who would always choose each other over the rest of the world. Star crossed-lovers where one of them would always be the Seme/Top or male-male and the other the Uke/Bottom or female-male. At the core of it all, BL was intended to be escapism, which eventually turned into fetishism and now can be all the above and something else entirely; evolution aye?

Mainly Asian women perhaps used BL to feel like their opinions and emotions could matter, in an environment where like also many other countries in Africa men are the ones that have the last say, or just any say at all. So they fulfilled their fantasy of being heard, and having power, while at the same time having the “strongest/most ideal” of men fall desperately in love with this male version of themselves. It is obviously much more complex than my two line sentence explanation, but for now, kindly keep this image in your mind.

Moving on!

The West and Queer Art - The queer genre in the West for the longest time was almost always a guaranteed tragedy. Interestingly enough, even though the first movie that mentioned homosexuality was in the 1960, the beginning of Queer culture in movies was, also for the West, in the 1970s. I can’t tell you the amount of books and films I have read and seen in my day says the woman in her thirties LOL and, despite the heart-wrenching looming tragedy, I would still enjoy finding comfort during those few chapters/scenes when the couple/pairing was happy, even though I knew for a fact that either one of them or both would die, or be eternally separated, or some other kind of tragedy.

The funny thing is that I would just accept it, because why not? Is not like my reality showed any different. It wasn’t like I was aware of happy and successful queer people around me, so why would I expect to read or watch anything else? Also I am a nasty ass angsty person so really I have no excuse. 

… are y’all following me thus far?

Now, let’s take a bit of a leap into the 2000s where money-makers finally clocked in on the fact that there is mad-money that can be made with BL in the East and Queerness in the West. In the East we start adopting fanservice within boybands and Asian-Dramas, we start printing thousands of BL mangas, and producing as many animes to match. In the West we keep having the token queer comedian appear on every show as well as making movies of historic queer figures who have impacted the world somehow, so that the queers can feel represented, even though all the actors are for the most part straight, because at this point in time, even though we acknowledge that Queer people exist, coming out is still very meh.

As the 2000s progress and we enter the 2010s thanks to actual progress within some western countries, the interweb and social media it becomes increasingly easier for an Eastern Fujoshi/Fudanshi/Fujin (Bl lover girl/boy/enby) to find themselves in say the UK, which has areas that breathe queerness and queer history and for a Western Queer to find themselves in say Japan where they can easily buy a manga about “queers” in happy relationship or, somewhere in South Korea, can easily see two very attractive boys/girls from a random kpop band openly kiss.

And then, in the midst of this “cultural” exchange, and awakening, something happens.

The Eastern Fujoshi/Fudanshi/Fujin realise that there are actual real queer people in the world sounds stupid, but believe me, it is not. That queer people are not just characters in a book, or anime, and that in fact there really are people in the world who are for example of the same sex and truly wanna be together and, if gay, for example, can also be both very masculine and still want to be together. At the same time the Western Queer realise that they actually can be happy, and that they deserves a happy ending, because some of this BLs aren’t half as bad and they sometimes make valid points and then you find out that actual queer people are now also writing BLs so things start to make some sense. 

As I mentioned, society was also changing, Queer people in the West started gaining a few rights, such as being able to get married in America and some European countries, and as a consequence, in the following decade, we now have series and movies that have Queer protagonist, with happy endings to boot! In the East, things are either not moving at all or moving a bit differently, or kinda slowly, but still it is movement. Within the countries that are moving differently, talking about Queerness is still heavy but has finally become something that they “don’t mind” just talking about and the gay neighbour is actually seen as the gay neighbour, whether they will talk to them is debatable, but at least they are recognised as such and not absurdly explained away or their existence ignored.

Now back to geography. The reason why I mentioned those 5 countries (China, Japan, South Korea, Taiwan and Thailand) is because at some point in the 2010s they were the main producers, and consumers, of BL within the Asian continent, and yes, while still being hella homophobic and, but let’s be real for a second, queer people have been around since the beginning of time, so even though BL was made and intended for women, our Queer Eastern Siblings would find a way to secretly also consume BL, being the closest thing to reading about a queer relationship, so added to the westerner consumption as well, it is no surprise that these 5 countries suddenly had a boom, despite having been being homophobic. 

Hence, it can be said that these 5 countries were on the same wavelength in the early 2010s, but what about now? With the considerable change in behaviour and thought with regards to Queer people in these countries in the early 2020s where do these 5 countries stand with regards to their Queer people and politics? Well, China has now banned BLs entirely, and I will not delve into their further lack of queer rights. Taiwan and Thailand have legalised Queer marriage. Then there is Japan which is making progress towards trying to legalise Queer marriage with to my greatest joy a successful ruling that happened this year in March related to same-sex unions … so, what about South Korea?

Well … SK is so close 🥹 … Yet so far 😫

It’s like they are taking 4 steps forward and 3 steps backwards, constantly. They are well far from China-levels which is a fucking relief I tell you! but they are dragging their feet to be at Japan-levels (and Japan is very close to Thailand and Taiwan Queer status currently). Yet, it is not as negative as it seems, or as some people try to portray it. You look around social media and they depict SK as if it were China. SK is currently facing a situation where it notices that things are changing and change is scary y’all. Resistance is the usual reaction to change, and the older generations, mainly those led by the Christian groups are not really where is at. SK’s youth and older liberal generations hold the answer to the Queer Korea questions.

So what exactly makes SK look hopeful? Well, time to get back to some History again 😘

The first Queer organisation in SK was formed in 1993 by 3 gay men and 3 lesbian women. The following year the 6 separated into 2 groups and formed the first gay organisation and the first lesbian one respectively. In 1997 we have the first demonstration for gay and lesbian rights, which then lead into 2000, the year of the first Pride Parade, which is one of the events of the very first Seol Queer Culture Festival Daegu Queer Culture Festival will be created in 2009, do keep this in mind … but another major event happened in the year 2000.

Y’all know that saying X walked so that Y could run? Well Hong Seok Cheon was basically forced to walk so that Queer Korean could learn how to properly train to run.

Though Seok-cheon is presently back to being somewhat popular again, his coming out was pretty traumatic. His career as comedian/actor started in 1994 and he was quite popular which landed him a good number of acting roles, and a lot of placements in comedy shows, as well as a kids show. In 2000 he was asked about his sexuality and he had no qualms in replying that he was gay. The show editors decided to cut out that part but a journalist gotta love them 🙃 got a hold of the footage and forced him to “elaborate”. Upon confirming, Seok-cheon lost all his jobs and was shunned verbally abused, discrimination and the lot, oh yes … by his own country. 

Not surprisingly, given that nobody in his own country wanted to interact with him, he at first thought of moving to the US to start afresh, but then decided against it. Seok-cheon decided to stay and prove to everyone in his country that he could make it and be successful again. And that he did. In 2002 he opened the first of what now is a high end chain of 9 restaurants in Itaewon. 2004 he joined the Democratic Labor Party and was selected by Time magazine as the Asian Hero of that year and in the following years Seok-cheon will keep racking up achievements  🎶🎵Did you see my bag? Did you see my bag? 🎶🎵 Namean?! (I’m not gonna list them all but you should definitely look him up and learn a bit about him, if you are interested).

But how does that connect to today? In 2008 he started his own talk show Coming Out and though there was a bit of resistance at the beginning as expected, the youth came in force and he started gaining audiences and boom! He was back on TV and slowly he’d get also a few cameos on prominent media, such as the Netflix drama Itaewon Class. Now let’s leave the lime-light for a second and let's look at the military 😬. It is vitally important that people understand that being gay is not illegal in any of the 5 countries we’ve been talking about yes, even China, but the public opinion and beliefs of each country greatly influence how their queer communities are thought of and treated.

Now, SK Military has become pretty infamous within the queer community for conducting witch-hunts in order to find out and humiliate gay soldiers, so much so that organisations such as Amnesty eventually had to step in. That being said, let's be real real real for a second. Though it is appalling what they have done to the queer soldiers, the SK military was also very famous for hazing, assaulting, causing cadets regardless of sexuality to want to unalive themselves and what more. All of the aforementioned, which put SK’s military on the map in a not so positive light globally, added to the increase in suicides, made the government address the situation, and they eventually came up with solutions such as the buddy system, which was first implemented in 2003. But, back to the gays. The most popular witch-hunt happened in 2017 where two soldiers amongst others were outed, but these particular two were found guilty of having sex off-base, during off hours.

In 2022 this conviction was overturned, the soldiers were no longer guilty and it is now no longer illegal, for queer soldiers, to have sex off-base during off-hours. You know what else happened in 2022? SK aired their first Queer reality shows, one being To Me(a)rry Queer and and the other being His Man. In 2023, His Man 2 will give us our first successful real-life queer couple, who are our beloved couple Junseong and Seongho (together known as Junseongho). They are the first queer couple to ever appear on Dazed magazine and we are all familiar with Dazed, it is not the front page like our boys get, but we all know how big of a deal this is, right?

You know what else happened in 2023? Remember that Daegu Queer Culture Festival I was talking about? The Mayor of Daegu (big Christian sympathiser) tried to stop this festival which includes the Parade and many other events, even though the Court ruled it was okay for the Festival to be carried out. The Mayor gathered other supporters and pulled up to the group, but the Daegu Police protected the Festival and removed the mayor and his “friends” from the premises. This was big and made news worldwide. 

In fact, Daegu’s Queer Culture Festival is the second largest one in the country, after Seoul’s. This is mainly possible because the Local Authorities (such as the police) are quite independent in belief from their present Mayor and the Christian factions. In contrast, for example, Busan’s Queer Culture Festival had a two year run but was then cancelled in 2019. Unfortunately, in Busan, The Mayor, the Local Authorities and the Christian factions are buddy-buddies making it much harder to get protection and permissions, aaaaaand things like that, kids, is why it is super important to vote for your local administration as well.

Even though these are all very important stepping stones, SK is nowhere close to being the UK, obviously. The LGBTQ community still has to get all their core rights being legalised, and queer people can still be subject to random ass attacks, such as the singer Holland had in 2022, which, by the way, also still occasionally does happen in the UK and everywhere else in the Queer World. Which is a general minority reality I’m afraid.

Furthermore, it is still illegal to have sex on base, which the country maintains that they are upholding because they are trying to prevent possible sexual assaults not too mad about this tbh, which is a valid concern, but most importantly they now know that the world is watching and why is that important? Because, for example, even though they are now separated, one of the boys from the Me(a)rry Queer couples enlisted around the same time with JK & JM and from his posts and photo-booth pictures that other soldiers posted of him, he seems to be making friends and to be comfy as comfy as you can get while serving, kinda like Joonie and most likely JM & JK

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Not quite the attitude of someone fearing a witch-hunt, right? But then again, there isn’t much to hunt when you are already out, it is afterall illegal to hunt people and the world is now aware; is there? …

Now back to the general people of SK. According to a survey conducted in 2023 last year, 56% of South Koreans still oppose same-sex marriage (in comparison with only 26% of Japanese). 56% is not bad but then 72% don’t want queer people in their neighbourhoods and  workplace, though 81% think that it is not right to terminate people because of their sexual orientation 4 steps ➡️3 steps ⬅️… … … Basically it’s okay to be queer here as in SK, but not here-here, perhaps over there like a queer only neighbourhood or something which at the moment is the Itaewon district. 

So yes, 2024 Queer SK is still struggling though they are not going to be overtly nasty about it, because the world is watching. I mean, don’t get me wrong, progress is progress and we love to see that, it is actually amazing, but there still needs to be a general environment where LGBTQ rights in SK need to be recognised and for queer Koreans to not be discriminated against in their social/work/family life. It is also great that Queer media is trying to transition more and more from only BL to actual Queer Drama, for example I am really looking forward to watching Love In The Big City which btw also stars Kim Go Eun.

There is still work to be done, but I think Jung Cueri, a lesbian woman who helps with the Seoul Queer Culture Festival, says it best (here is the full article https://www.dw.com/en/why-are-south-koreans-less-welcoming-of-lgbtq-neighbors/a-68698268 ):

“I think the attitudes of younger generations of Koreans are getting better," she said, pointing out that young LGBTQ+ individuals "tend to come out sooner to their families, in their workplaces and schools than my generation because they are more aware of their sexuality through social media and exposure to various discussions that are more tolerant of LGBTQ+ people." And the cultural festival can help to be a catalyst to change further, she believes. "It will get better," she said. "And that is why the organizers and everyone else involved in the festival are working so hard; they know that Korean society will get better, and they want to contribute to that.

From where I stand it seems Hopeful, Queerful, if you may.

So, Fighting!, Queer South Korea!

Always respectfully yours,

Marengo. 

[winniethewife]

Quiet moments and Silent Questions (Moon Knight System x reader)

Inspired By @guruan art linked below

https://www.tumblr.com/guruan/707431147652694016/silent-question

Warnings: Fluff, Angst and Flirting. In that order.

Words: 1030

Steven

She and Steven were sitting across from each other in at the café, trying to squeeze in some time together, before she leaves for an inconveniently timed business trip. Things were just really starting to make sense, they had just started to get serious in this relationship, Steven had finally found the courage to tell her he was a system, and what that meant, it was bumpy at first, but she felt like she was handling it well.

So of course the minute the four of them were just starting to get into the flow of things, is when her boss decided this would be the best time to send her to help with the start up with a new branch of the company, in Switzerland, for a month. She had tried to argue she had personal things to attend to at home, but without having a real reason, not wanting to divulge anything about her boyfriend(s?) she was forced to go or say good bye to any chance of a promotion in the next year. So here she was, sitting with Stevens hands in hers their tea cups cold and long forgotten as they opted to just sit together. Enjoying each other’s quiet company.

She could tell Steven wanted to say something, the way his brow slightly furrows, he searches her eyes looking for an answer to the question in his mind. Wets his lips with his tongue, before he looks directly at her, the concerned lines in his fore head as his eyebrows push together, and his dark eyes meeting hers with desperation.

“Can I kiss you? Please?”  He silently begs.

She gave him the smallest smile, before leaning in to kiss him, her soft lips on his, gently moving together. At first she looks into his eyes as they kiss before softly closing them as she puts her hand on his cheek.

Marc

When she got back from Switzerland it was really hard for them to fall back into any sort of pattern. But Marc took the absence the hardest. Which led to him retreating to the headspace more often than not. She tried to be patient but this was starting to become a problem. She would come back to Steven’s flat at the end of the day and there would be signs that Marc had been fronting, things of his left out, or a suddenly fronting Steven or Jake standing in the middle of the room, often confused as to why they were suddenly pushed out. Bothering everyone else involved, Including the cat. He was avoiding her and that hurt. It hurt a lot.

Eventually one day, Steven and Jake convinced him to talk to her. he sat at the end of the bed, hair pushed back brow furrowed, his usual serious expression on his  face. She came in after a long day of work and saw him waiting looking down at the ground as she came in. the silence was tense, but familiar. She got on her knees in front of him and he looked up at her. His face softened, eyes first then his brow rests as his lip gently part. He doesn’t know how to put it into words. He doesn’t know how to ask. But as so often the case his face spoke to her.

“Do you still love me?”  His fear and regret silently calls out to her

She takes his hands in hers and runs her thumbs over his knuckles. Her eyes meeting his as she gives him a gentle smile.

“I’ll always love you, no matter what. I’m not going anywhere. I promise.” She says quietly. He rests his forehead on hers, their eyes close, sighs of relief leave their lips.

Jake

Date nights with Jake we’re always interesting, but nothing short of romantic. But it was actually the unplanned short moments where she isn’t expecting to see him that are the best to her. She was just walking home after having to stay late at work, her office wasn’t far from the flat, but it had gotten dark. She had waved goodbye to a coworker when she turns and under the streetlamp stood Jake, Bundled up for the chilly weather, hat pulled down over his forehead, gloved hands in his pockets. She smiled at him as she approached him he looks up at her with his own slight smile on his face. Offering her his arm, which she gratefully takes her fingers inter woven with his and pushed deep in his plush lined pocket.

They walked together in silence the moonlight guiding their path as she leans into him, shoulders touching, her head resting on his shoulder, her messenger bag over his shoulder as they walked. There wasn’t a need for talking or an explanation of his presence, just the sounds of the city around them was enough. As the wind starts to pick up he pulls her in closer, he wanted to protect her from everything, he probably had the hardest time while she was away for all the different business trips she went on for her job, He’s the one that fronts at the least convenient times to have a relationship, especially one with any distance, but on top of that he can’t protect her when she’s half way around the world or in the middle of fucking nowhere, why did they have an office in Wichita Kansas anyway? But right now, he can walk her home, in the dark and keep her safe.

As they approached the flat she half expected him to give her a kiss on the cheek and head out, either to work some driving hours or do something for the stupid pigeon, but he turns to her, his slight smile widens to a smirk and he cocks an eyebrow flirtatiously as her gives her a good once over. This look definitely needed no translation.

“You…me…Bedroom?” His silent confidence in her answer leaves her laughing.

Hands still intertwined as they get in the elevator, past the front door, under the covers, and even as they fall asleep bodies intertwined with each other, A small dark hairless cat curling up beside them.

---

Masterlist

A/N: Had to Squeeze Pequeña Viejita in there at the end <3

[leucrotta]

Werewolf Watch 4

Well, this one’s late this week, but whatever. Who cares! Nothing matters and the points are made up! Anyway, we yet again have a relative unknown for our movie this week. It’s produced by studio “Fun Time Productions”, written, directed, and starred-in by a single person, and its budget was probably 16 dollars and a ham sandwich. In skimming past its reviews, (which I did not read, of course,) I noticed folks seemed to have some interesting things to say in their titles.

Are we in for another snooze fest indie disaster? Are we in for some “so bad it’s good”? Or will this film surprise us with a unique and effective story?

Who knows. Without further ado, let’s talk about...

NIGHT HOWL

There’s little information and almost no behind-the-scenes images for this movie, but the studio’s other three films have plenty. Glancing through them, a lot of the same people seem to appear in each film. I’ll be honest, this entire outfit seems like a group of college buddies just hanging out and making movies with consumer-grade cameras. And honestly? That might be for the best. Apparently the special features on the home release include bloopers, which tells me they probably aren’t taking themselves too seriously. We can only hope. The description for this movie is much longer on IMDb, but I like the brutal, comedic shortness of the one on Rotten Tomatoes instead: “A socially awkward photographer cannot cope with his mother's death.” Excellent start. Here we go.

(Please be aware that this review WILL contain spoilers!

TWs for this review include suicide.)

The Plot

The movie opens on a mother telling her son an apparently wolf-themed bedtime story. The audio was absolute garbage, so I missed the last two sentences of the story itself, but after it’s finished, the boy asks his mother about the existence of wolves. “They’re just like big puppies”, she assures him. But what about werewolves? “Just things that are in stories”, she says. “I promise they’re not real.”

Even without the film’s description online, I’m pretty sure I could’ve seen her eventual fate from space.

The mother heads out, leaving her son snug in his… wait. This kid sleeps on a couch?? No really, there is no bed here.

Sure. Whatever. (And yes, the entire movie is that dark. Color correction is a lost art, apparently.)

But uh-oh, Kaci (that’s the kid’s name) it seems like there’s some weird monster hand gripping the doorway. Slowly reaching for him in the dark.

This is a new record, folks, we got the first werewolf sighting at just over 2 minutes in. This movie really knows what it’s about, and for that, I have to respect it. Also for not stringing me along for an entire movie only to not give me a werewolf at all. (I’m not still bitter.)

Moving on, it’s time for a timeskip! Kaci is now an adult, and his dog is waking him up. The dog will never be relevant again. He lives in a bedroom with almost no decorations or personal items whatsoever, except, mysteriously, for a single plastic butter knife on his bedside table. He works as a photographer, and he soon meets up with his client. The shots (of the film, not his) begin to wobble like old VHS footage, just without the tracking lines. It’s honestly a little hard to watch. Through the following few scenes, we get an idea of Kaci’s life. His frequent photography client has a crush on him. His landlady has a crush on him. He goes home alone and edits photos, and we are forced to watch the entire process. Thankfully, something weird interrupts.

Kaci begins to hear his dog barking, except it isn’t his dog barking. It’s coughing sounds, and it’s coming from his bedroom. He opens the door to find what looks like people having sex under the sheets, but no, it’s just the werewolf.

Which turns out to be a hallucination, naturally, which is good for Kaci, because his friend has just arrived to take a piss and vape. Their conversation doesn’t last long, as Kaci randomly declares he has a doctor’s appointment. He bikes off, soon arriving at what is very clearly just someone’s house. No, sorry, it’s definitely a psychiatrist’s office. The worst psychiatrist’s office, as the doctor chides his patient for not inviting his photography client up for sex, and then proceeds to analyze his dreams. Or tries to, only to say he doesn’t know what they mean after all. Very important scene, followed by news coverage of a missing family of four. Hmm, wonder what that’s all about, huh?

Don't worry, we never find out.

But speaking of which, time for our first on-screen victim! And who’s the lucky winner? Why, it’s none other than Kaci’s horny landlady!

The werewolf doesn’t really do anything to her, just rocks her car a lot and wiggles its head in her face. I think it’s supposed to be mauling her, but there’s no real indication of that. Would a little fake blood have been too expensive here?

Next, Kaci dreams of the day his mother died, the day that apparently haunts him every night. He’s a little kid again, and he and his mom are walking in the park. Or their yard? Unclear. They talk about Kaci’s bullies, about dinner plans, and then they notice their dead dog behind a tree. His mother goes to investigate. But suddenly!

RIP mom. (No, I don't know why the title is in one screenshot.)

The following day, back in the real world, Kaci rides his bike to the park. (It’s actually the park for sure this time.) He takes a few pictures of random trees, but upon hearing his name whispered on the wind, he heads deeper into the forest. He finds zombie mom, who chases him into the park bathroom.

Just when he thinks he’s safe, Kaci gets the third (possibly the fourth) “character turns the other way and the monster was behind them the whole time” jumpscare. But of course there’s not really anything there, it’s just Kaci losing his mind, or whatever. He finally calms down, only to immediately stumble upon the hanging body of a suicide victim. Which he begins to photograph. Initially, I thought this was so he could make sure it was real, but he took an awful lot of photos for that, so…

It doesn't really matter, as this will never be mentioned again.

At some later point, time is unclear, Kaci’s vape friend (Devin) and his photography client (Ema) break into his apartment while he’s out. They make themselves comfortable until Kaci comes home, with Ema logging on to Kaci’s computer in a further blatant violation of privacy. The movie treats Kaci as unreasonable for being upset when he returns, but honestly I’m on his side here.

Anyway, they order pizza and Kaci tells Ema about his nightmares, and how his mom died. She says she believes him. Eventually they all go their separate ways, and Devin decides to smoke some pot on his porch. Instead, he is killed by a werewolf.

RIP Devin.

Meanwhile, Kaci is having a seizure or something. He kicks and writhes, then ends up in his closet, where he starts choking and flailing around. I have no idea what’s happening, but I wish he was wearing pants. After an uncomfortable amount of time watching him do… whatever this is, he appears to turn into the werewolf. Oh, but never mind, it’s just a dream.

He wakes up, pukes some blood, and goes to his psychiatrist. The psychiatrist is also vaping, now. Upon hearing that Kaci has been vomiting blood, he tells him he’s going to raise the dose on his psych meds (which Kaci has not been taking at all). Again, this is the worst psychiatrist ever. The transition to the next scene is confusing, but apparently Kaci “goes off” on the psychiatrist and “threatens to blackmail him”. I have no idea what this means, or what possible blackmail material he could have, because it wasn't shown. Kaci goes to the riverside to have a public breakdown, but only until Ema calls and asks to hang out. They throw bread at ducks in the park.

Later, when they go to check on Devin, Kaci is instead called to just another guy’s house- no, sorry, a morgue. There he identifies Devin’s body, and receives a “sorry for your loss, buddy” from the coroner or whatever he’s supposed to be. Devin’s body animates briefly to tell Kaci that this is his fault. Kaci smiles at this for some reason.

I swear on my ancestors that if this movie pulls an “it’s just this guy being crazy off his meds and there’s no real werewolf” I will be. Upset.

Anyway, time for the next murder. The psychiatrist finds the werewolf eating his secretary.

RIP secretary.

And RIP psychiatrist.

The next morning, Ema wakes up next to Kaci. She gets up, snoops around in his cupboards, and the audience has to watch her take a piss. Not graphically, mind you, but still. She gets back in bed, only to have the fifth instance of the “character turns and the monster is beside them” jumpscare when the werewolf is now beside her, then killing her. Except it’s just another dream, yet again, which begs the question why Kaci dreams about Ema taking a piss. I feel like that’s worse than the werewolf thing. I mean whatever, I won’t kinkshame.

Kaci makes pancakes for Ema, and they talk about how happy they are. Devin’s tragic death from yesterday is entirely forgotten, because it is romance time now. Even though Kaci gave her a fork, Ema eats the pancakes with her fingers, like a caveman. Later, they decide to go monster hunting, to see if they can find the werewolf’s lair. They almost arbitrarily pick what they claim to be the only abandoned building in town, and then quickly make the gravest mistake in D&D: they split up. Kaci finds the werewolf after like, ten seconds.

Or rather, it finds him. Ema comes running when Kaci screams, but she finds he’s not there anymore. Instead, the werewolf is. Which, at the very least, confirms it’s real, since now someone other than Kaci has seen it. She seems to have a very long time to run away, but for some reason decides she can only escape through a very heavy garage door that she probably couldn’t lift on her own, even if it weren’t locked. The werewolf (very slowly) approaches, so she hits it in the face with her flashlight and runs. She doesn’t run far, though, and sort of “hides” beside a doorway, all the while making very loud noises. She is terrible at hide-and-seek.

A cop shows up, really not sure why, and runs inside, hearing Ema scream. He encounters the werewolf and shoots it, and the beast falls.

RIP werewolf?

Nah, RIP police man.

Ema grabs the cop’s gun and shoots the werewolf. It falls, and then, in a voice so low I didn’t know it happened until I turned the subtitles back on, it begins to plead for help. Ema cautiously approaches.

She reaches for the werewolf’s face. She pulls it off, Scooby-Doo style.

And- oh are you serious right now??? IS THIS REAL LIFE???

“God dammit,” Ema says. My thoughts exactly.

I realize none of the other screenshots show the main character, but that's Kaci under the mask. So yeah, turns out it was Kaci all along. He has “multiple mental health issues”, which include schizophrenia and dissociative identity disorder (the movie uses an outdated term for this). When he doesn’t take his medicine, he blacks out for hours at a time.

Once again, my thoughts exactly, Ema.

Somehow, Kaci actually survived all that, and now he’s in the hospital.

Yes, you did. You ruined my werewolf movie. Again.

We flash back to the day Kaci’s mother died, and we see that, after a seizure, he grabbed his mother’s knife and killed her. Back in the present, he has yet another seizure, this time with blood coming out of his mouth and nose. He presumably dies.

A year later, Ema is visited by her previously unmentioned sister. She apparently got pregnant from the time she and Kaci spent the night together, because now she has his son. Later that night, something confusing happens. Kaci appears, as if he’s a ghost, to tell his son not to grow up like him. Then, abruptly, he’s the werewolf again, and he… eats the baby? I think?

I have just. So many questions.

The Review

Imagine me making a long-suffering sigh. Here we are, yet again. Another werewolf movie, another non-existent werewolf. If you yourself are thinking about writing a werewolf story, I think I can now safely tell you that the “nope it turns out it wasn’t a werewolf” trope is, perhaps, overdone. Though admittedly, that time with bigfoot was a curve ball.

Anyway, back to Night Howl. I really wanted to like this movie. As I said in the beginning, it seemed a lot like a bunch of friends just having a good time, making a movie because they were passionate about making movies. You know, the indie dream. Art for art’s sake. I was kind of rooting for it. I am no longer doing that.

Tonally, this movie was all over the place. It tried to be scary whenever the werewolf appeared, but the terrible costume and sound effects ruined it. It tried to be funny with its dialogue, but all of the jokes fell flat due to awful timing. It tried to be dramatic and emotional, but almost none of the actors could sell it. Pretty much the only actor with any skill was the one who played Ema, and you could tell she wasn’t a professional, but she really gave it her all and didn’t do a bad job. Everyone else, on the other hand, was pretty wooden, or they seemed to sort of stumble over their lines. They didn’t put much effort into their delivery, they didn’t really get into character.

To be fair, they didn’t have much to work with. The characters themselves were flat, and the script wasn’t great. The actual plot was, well, you read it. Fairly typical, tropey storyline: man traumatized by monster sees monster again many years later, combined with man turns out to be crazy and also the monster after all. I guess him donning an actual costume was… kind of new? Except it just made me think of Peachfuzz from Creep, which is an infinitely better movie. Go watch Creep.

Anyway, this movie was basically a nothing-burger with a side of “why”.

I give this movie a 3.5 out of 10.

Werewolf Effects

Oh hey, we actually kind of got some of these this time. Improvement! Or maybe not.

The suit looks like, well, a suit. A cheap one. The mask is clearly foam latex, the fur is obviously faux, the claws are obviously plastic. The teeth are, too. In fact, I’m almost certain I own a grey version of this mask that I tore apart and customized. The teeth look familiar, and if that’s true, these guys literally bought it at Spirit Halloween.

At least the jaw moves, but again, so does mine. Spirit Halloween, I’m telling you. There are times during the movie where you can pretty clearly see the actor’s eyes and mouth, which means they didn’t even bother to put anything under it, or in the eye sockets.

I would call it kind of smart to make it look so fake, seeing as how it was, in the movie, just a suit, but if you’re going to try and trick us as an audience, you need to actually, you know, try.

Werewolf Lore

There really wasn’t any.

Final Thoughts

In the end, I still have a lot of questions. Like, if his doctors knew that Kaci was an active danger to others, which they apparently did, why did they just kind of let him do whatever? And at the end, how did he fake his own death and escape the hospital? With the werewolf suit? And speaking of which, how in the world did he do any damage whatsoever with a werewolf mask? The film shows him “biting” people on the neck, which kills them. I have worn enough articulated masks, and made enough myself, to know that isn’t really possible. Those jaws are not strong enough to do much beyond pinching fingers, at worst, and unless you make your own custom murder teeth, they’re specifically designed to be safe. Also how did he sneak the werewolf costume into the abandoned building with Ema? Did he hide it up his ass?

Ugh, whatever. I don’t even care. This movie was a waste of my time, so it would also be a waste of yours. Go watch Creep instead.

[cyncerity]

hi everyone! little bit of an update!!

to those of you waiting for the next part in the store shifter au: it’s almost done, i swear.

the rest of this is a lengthy explanation cause y’all know me, i can’t write something short. tldr will be bolded at the bottom if you don’t wanna read all this.

i wanna explain something real quick: in my early years of middle school, i was into creepypasta, which pipelined into Marble Hornets, which pipelined into a ton of other slenderverse series. If you don’t know what that is, it’s an ARG with an emphasis on characters being stalked or hunted by Slenderman. All of them are really really good in their own way and do interesting things with not only Slendy, but adding their own new big bad’s and lore and i’d highly recommend watching one if you haven’t yet. (i may make a separate post about which you should watch based on what kind of content you most enjoy cause i really want to indoctrinate more people into this)

My favorite slenderverse at the time had a very big emphasis on early November, specifically November 11th. So i started to have a little tradition of watching those videos every November 11th even after the hyperfixation had faded just for a bit of nostalgia.

Fast forward to now- it has snowballed to the point where every year for over half a decade now, November 11th rolls around and I am thrown violently headfirst back into my slenderverse phase. I cannot control it. I’ll be like “ok this year i’ll be normal about it, after this long, surely watching one video won’t spiral me again” and it always fucking does. No other hyperfixation i’ve ever had has functioned on a calendar cycle so idk wtf this is. This is the 6th year of this. I cannot escape.

So yeah, per how it’s been since middle school, November-January my main hyperfixation will be slenderverse. It could be shorter, it could be longer, but that’s the general pattern i’ve noticed over the years. After that i’ll pretty much be back to normal.

Don’t get me wrong, i’m not taking a 3 month hiatus or anything. I promise i will do my best to get the store shifter au part out before fucking 2024. But if you’ve sent me an ask recently and i’ve ignored it, i’m genuinely so sorry, but i can’t force myself to work on new stuff right now when mcyt g/t isn’t my main interest. I’ll do my best to get to it eventually when the hyperfixation comes back a bit more, i do read and process and think about every single ask i receive and it always makes my day when i get a new ask, but yeah. For the next few months i’m probably only gonna be working on and posting stuff that’s been in the works, are from asks that we’re given to me like a year ago and already have wips in progress to answer them, or art that i just haven’t given you yet.

on the other hand, if you’re reading this and you like creepypasta or slenderverse stuff, i’ve created what i think is literally my 5th fucking blog! @cynningly <-i’ve been spamming this for like 4 days cause i refuse to be normal about slenderverse stuff, but follow there if you want horror stuff and so far just a bunch of really shitty edits of internet arg sexyman villains. Also yes all of my blogs have to have “cyn” in the name somewhere, that’s how you can tell it’s me lmao

tldr:

my hyperfixations switched up again, im really into slenderverse (slenderman-centric args) at the moment and likely will be till January. This is a cycle that’s been going on for years now. made an alt for it -> @cynningly

I will still be working to post mcyt g/t stuff, but only stuff that’s a wip or has been in the works for a while. to anyone who has sent an ask recently: sorry, but i can’t take on making new stuff when my focus isn’t purely on mcyt rn. I will do my best to get to it eventually and if you’re one of the people who’s sent a story request or ask recently i truly, truly appreciate it. y’all make my day. but, yeah, that’s what’s going on with me lol

[greenerteacups]

Frequently Asked Questions

Hi! If I’m asked a question more often than sometimes, it’s probably here. Static page also accessible at this link.

When is the next chapter coming out?

I update on Friday mornings, weekly, usually before noon PST. If it’s a Friday and you don’t see an update, it’s either because I’m on a writing break, or we’re in a hiatus between books. Or I've been hit by a car or something.

Do you have social media?

Aside from Tumblr — nope! I’m one of those hermit types. My AO3 account was previously the only place I was active online. I made a Tumblr so I could offer a platform to interact with people who are more comfortable here than in the AO3 comments section (for instance, there’s no anonymity function on AO3; you can log out and comment as a guest, but that’s a lot of work, and then there's not an easy way to check if your question was answered.)

Can I tag you in [thing]?

Yeah! I check back in here every few days, on average, to scope out my inbox and my mentions. If you make something for my fic, I’ll publicize it everywhere, obviously.

Can I bind your fics?

Yep! Carte blanche. I don’t own the copyright for anything I write, so I appreciate the thoughtfulness of people asking, but you can absolutely go ahead and do whatever the hell you want with the text of my fic. Print it, paint it, burn it, bind it, turn it into blackout poetry. Transformative art is human nature. But if you do, please, please, show me! I’ll scream for a thousand years.

Caveat: I’ve seen some people have anxieties about the sale of bound fics for profit, since they’re worried about publishers cracking down on copyright violation and litigating fanfiction. This is tough, because on the one hand, bookbinding can be expensive; on the other hand, selling fic is a violation of copyright, and the only way AO3 is allowed to exist is by authors making precisely $0 from anything they post. (This is why AO3 will boot you immediately if they catch you trying to make money from non-original works on their site — if I so much as drop a PayPal link in the description for Lionheart, the fic will quickly be taken down, and my account could be suspended.) So my stance is: I’m not going to sell my fics; if you bind for personal use, this doesn’t matter, go for it, live deliciously, etc; if you bind to sell, please be careful and discreet as you can. But you have my OK, for what it’s worth.

Can I translate your fics?

Yes, of course.

Will you write other things, besides Lionheart?

Eventually, yeah. Probably nothing longform soon, however. When I’m writing something, I get engrossed in the world and I sort of tunnel-vision onto the project. When Lionheart goes on a hiatus between books, I may pop out and do something else, just to keep my skills sharp and give my mind a break. That’s where shorter pieces like The Climb and SWLITS came from. But I keep my eyes on the prize, as far as what I’m writing, because I pride myself on having finished most (though admittedly, not all) things I’ve ever started on AO3. I hate having unfinished projects  cluttering up my Works page. 

I don’t read WIPs. When will Lionheart be finished/should I read Lionheart?

Listen, I’m not gonna tell anyone how to read fic. If your reading preferences make you happy, then you’re doing it right. And I’ve also been burned by remarkable WIPs that peter out, or die on a cliffhanger, and they just about break my heart. I can’t promise that won’t happen, because I don’t know what life holds in store. I also can’t promise when Lionheart will be finished, because, frankly, I have no idea! As a full-book rewrite, if you look at the current chapter count, and then look at the number of books in the series, then, yeah, it clearly has a long way to go.

But I also know that the Completed Works filter on AO3 is hiding a lot of good fic, and I think people who only read completed stuff are missing out on the real fun of update culture — of reading something serially, the excitement of waiting for the next chapter to drop, looking for clues about long-running puzzles, theorizing in the comments, getting to experience each new hit live. That’s one of the few things about fanfic that you can’t get in a novel, and it’s a real treat. I’d at least give it a try.

Otherwise, here’s what I can tell you: Books 1, 2, 3, and 4 will all be finished. They will have completed endings, and will offer (satisfying, I hope) resolutions to the major conflicts of those stories. And that’s a fact.

[cows-wearing-my-sweater]

3, 4, 16, 27 !!❤❤

3. describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic: this is such a good question ! for me personally i need to start writing when i’m feeling some sort of strong emotion that i can pour into the chapter, doesn’t matter what the emotion is. from there i start making just a concise list of what i want the fic to look like/become; if i think of a rlly specific setting, piece of dialogue, metaphor, etc. that i wanna use, i write it down real quick so i can keep brainstorming. and then i just kind of write and keep writing !! eventually i’ll stop, read it all back, and decide what i like/dislike and how i can edit it :-)

4. where do you find inspiration for new ideas? everywhere!!! i do art outside of fic writing as well, so i’m sort of always looking for something to inspire me and i’ve come to realize that there are always ideas all around me. it could be anything from seeing a photo on pinterest and wanting to make something from it, to taking a rlly strong emotion/situation in your life and writing something around that!

16. how many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? share one of them? full honesty with y’all, i’m not the kind of writer who always has a million ideas on the back burner, it’s why my blog is only half fic, half other things 😭 i’m currently working on the next chapter of eternal summer (and maybe part three for it), but that’s about it </3 and i don’t wanna spoil anything so i’m afraid i can’t share any ideas with u rn, but i promise it’ll be worth it once i post the next part !!!!

27. what’s your most and least favorite part of writing? least favorite part is when i know exactly what i want to convey and but all my ideas are only half-formed and i can’t really find the right words for it. it’s soooo frustrating and i have to take breaks from writing all the time bc of it. my favorite part though is the feeling i get when i do finally find the perfect words or the perfect metaphor for some really strong feeling i have, and i write it down and read it back and it just sounds and feels so right :’)

[frostedfaves]

Stay the Night

Masterlist

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader

Summary: Natasha and Wanda came to Westview for a fresh start, but meeting someone new brings back old habits.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, dark!fic, magical mental manipulation (courtesy of Wanda), a bit of forced submission, implied masturbation and sex toy mention, other insinuated things (no questions please 🤠), kidnapping and blood mention, WandaVision AU that completely disregards Endgame to give WandaNat a real happy ending

A/N: it’s been literal months since the last time I posted anything, but I was determined to at least get this first part out eventually even if I only had 3 followers left. no idea what I’m doing going forward because so much has changed with me that I’m not even sure what I want to write, I just know I want to. anyway here’s the ask that inspired this

-

“Where are you headed, love?”

Wanda stops with her hand on the doorknob, the other gripping the handle of a can of paint with a brush resting on top. She carefully turns so as not to drop the unsecured item and acknowledges her wife from across the room.

“I’m going to fix the paint I chipped, Natalia.”

“You mean you aren’t going to wave your magic wand this time?” Natasha’s eyes are narrowed but her playful smile gives her away. “I never knew you were such a handywoman.”

“As if you’re so surprised about what my hands can do.”

The front door is closed behind Wanda, muffling whatever comeback Natasha was beginning to make, and she makes her way over to the corner of the house that didn’t match the rest. With careful strokes, the damaged area is covered in a brilliant shade of red, glistening in the sun as it begins to dry. She’s just about to head in when she hears a voice she doesn’t recognize followed by her neighbor’s door slamming closed and footsteps. Wandering across the lawn to get a better look, she notices a young woman sitting on the porch wearing shorts that are very similar to her overalls and a loose T-shirt with extra fabric that gets trapped between her stomach and thigh when she bends over to fix her shoe.

“Hey.”

You look up from your seat on the porch and notice a woman with reddish-orange hair studying you with hands slightly stained red resting on the fence. Her eyes glance between you and her hands and she quickly catches on, removing them with an embarrassed chuckle.

“Sorry, I’m an artist…if you count repairing a scuffed wall as art.”

“Let’s see.” You stand and look over at the spot she was working on. “Yeah, I’d pay to see it in a museum.”

Her laugh causes you to grin as you approach her from the other side of the fence, placing your own hands just an inch or two from where hers used to be as you introduce yourself.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Wanda.” She makes a movement to shake your hand and quickly changes her mind when she catches sight of her own again. “I’m not usually this forgetful, dear. Anyway, I was wondering if you were new to the neighborhood. I’ve never seen you here before.”

“Technically, although I don’t live here. My friend just moved in and I thought I’d visit her now that she’s all set.” You lean in just a bit closer and slightly lower your voice. “She wouldn’t even let me take off work until she had every room unpacked and organized. I made a joke that she wanted to set up her sex dungeon first so I wouldn’t accidentally find any of her tools and she didn’t like it very much.”

“She probably shouldn’t come to our house then,” Wanda teases but your brows raise slightly.

“Our?”

“Yes, I live with my wife. Actually, we haven’t met your friend either. Would the two of you like to come over for dinner later? We’d love to welcome her to the neighborhood properly.”

“I think I can talk her into it.” You turn toward the house when you hear your name called through a cracked window and quickly face Wanda again. “I have to go but I’ll–we’ll–see you tonight?”

“Anytime after 7 works for us. I might go a bit overboard but I promise it won’t be anything fancy. You could even wear pajamas if you want,” she offers and you laugh.

“Be careful or I might take you up on that. Okay, see you then!” You disappear into the house again with an enthusiastic wave as Wanda supervises before heading into her own home to share the news with her loving partner.

“So you invited this anonymous new neighbor and her friend over for dinner…tonight?” Natasha repeats and Wanda nods in response. “May I ask why you suddenly want two strangers in our home?”

“One of the strangers is really cute,” Wanda pouts as she grabs Natasha’s hands, allowing herself to be led over to the sink to have the paint washed off her skin.

“Meaning?”

“New pet,” she admits, growing nervous when Natasha freezes mid scrub.

“No.”

“But Nat–”

“Don’t ‘but Nat’ me, Wanda,” the redhead mocks as she continues scrubbing. “I let you try this already and it didn’t work.”

“I think you’ll like her too.”

“I doubt it.”

“But what if she’s really good? Really obedient? I heard you like that.”

“How can you be so sure? I’ve never experienced it.”

“Rude.” Wanda lightly nudges her away with her hip and reaches for the paper towels. “I’m just saying…don’t let one bad apple ruin the bunch or whatever that saying is. Don’t you think it’d be fun to have something new to play with?”

“I’m assuming you’ve already given her a test run then.”

“Not yet.” Wanda returns to Natasha’s side with a paper towel for her hands and drops her head onto her shoulder. “I figured you might want to help me.”

-

You ring the doorbell at exactly 7:01, hoping Sheri will take your subtle but constant movements as nerves and not excitement to see Wanda again. You had no idea what her wife was like or if she’d even like you, then again you barely knew Wanda either. What you were hoping to get out of this gathering was also still a mystery.

“You’re here! Welcome to our home!” Wanda greets you cheerily as she opens the door and you go to respond with the same level of excitement, instead driving an elbow into Sheri’s side when you notice her staring at the older pair.

“Sorry…No one told me I was having dinner with two Avengers.”

“Technically we’re not Avengers anymore,” a woman replies behind Wanda and she steps aside to reveal her wife, you’re assuming. “Natasha, but I’m guessing you knew that already.”

“So why did you leave the team?” Sheri inquires as she follows Natasha to the dining room and Wanda closes the door behind her, and you don’t miss the way she subtly guides you for a second with a gentle hand on your back.

“I don’t know. Something about half the world disappearing for five years really just…”

“...wears you out?” Wanda suggests as she pulls your chair out for you and Natasha shakes her head.

“I was going to say it makes me want to isolate myself from everything and everyone I’ve ever known, but yes, that too.” She takes a seat and begins pouring wine into a glass. “I wanted to go a bit further than New Jersey, but I can’t say I haven’t enjoyed my time here.”

“Do you mind telling me more about this place?” you ask once Wanda is done serving everyone and takes a seat across from you. “If it sounds good, maybe I’ll move too.”

You were partially joking but something about Wanda’s eyes suddenly brightening and even Natasha’s sudden interest in your statement made you want to consider the possibility.

“What would you like to know?”

-

Two hours later, the room is filled with laughter in response to the latest joke passed around the table. Dinner was even more enjoyable than you imagined it could be, the four of you talking nonstop between bites of food. The atmosphere was so energetic that you were genuinely surprised when Sheri yawned and stood up suddenly.

“I just want to say that I’ve had so much fun over here and I’m so glad you were the first neighbors I met. I hope you won’t be mad if I head home now, though.”

“So soon?” you pout and she sighs.

“I know, but I’m exhausted from all the preparation I did before you came. You’re welcome to stay here though, if you both don’t mind,” she adds with a glance at the hosts, and they both grin.

“Of course we don’t mind!” Natasha speaks up before Wanda can, rising to a stance as well. “After all, we did promise her a movie night. Who says that can’t be tonight?”

“We’re also still in the process of convincing her to move,” Wanda adds.

“Okay, well…You know where the spare is but if you forget, my ringer will be on.”

You all exchange goodbyes with Sheri while Natasha walks her out, even making sure she’s inside before returning to the table. Wanda waves off your attempt to help her clear the table in the meantime and Natasha takes a seat next to you.

“So…how about that movie?”

“Sure! I just have to run to the bathroom and then we can start.”

“No, you can wait.” You raise your brows with a laugh that’s cut short when her hand on your thigh stops you from getting up. “If you think I’m joking, you’re wrong. You’ll go when we say so. Got it?”

After a couple seconds you silently nod. She clears her throat and you almost immediately realize what she wants from you.

“Yes, I understand.”

“Good girl.”

A shiver travels down your spine as her fingertips lightly drag across your thigh before she stands, offering the same hand to you which you accept instantly. She leads you into a different room with a couch sitting in front of a projector aimed at the only wall that’s completely empty. Wanda appears a minute later with glasses of water and a blanket that she spreads across your laps once she’s settled. After the projector is set up, each woman scoots closer and rests her head against her hand, elbows pressed into the couch behind you as the movie is played.

You aren’t sure how much time has passed since the movie started, but at some point you notice your bathroom need has become a little more urgent. One of your legs begins to bounce under the blanket and shortly after, Wanda grabs your chin and turns your head toward her, pushing the rim of a glass to your lips.

“Open,” she quietly commands and you obey, reluctantly swallowing the water she carefully pours in. “Good girl.”

The water only touches the halfway mark of the glass now but you feel twice as full. Your attention strays from the movie as your leg bounces even faster now, and you’re practically holding back whimpers with the effort of trying not to piss your pants on the couch. It’s almost to the point where you think that might be your only option when Natasha leans just a bit closer to whisper in your ear.

“Go. You have our permission.”

Wanda throws the blanket aside before you can try to unscramble your thoughts to figure out how to do so yourself, and you follow the path you remember Sheri taking earlier in the night down the hall to the bathroom. You finally sit down and let out a sigh of relief that turns into a gasp when you feel a bit of cum slipping out of you as well. This is a sudden development that you don’t think you have the time or clarity to explore.

Instead, you return to the couch to finish the movie, releasing a very real yawn as the credits roll that prompts the two older women to call it a night. Natasha begins to clean up as Wanda walks you home, that same guiding hand resting on your back the whole way there.

“Thank you so much for coming over tonight, lovely,” she speaks quietly in the still air of the night, a warm smile appearing under the porch light. “Promise to come back soon?”

“Of course,” you answer pretty quickly, surprising yourself. “Although I don’t want to just abandon Sheri. She’s the whole reason I’m here.”

“She’s welcome too, sweet girl. We loved her company as well.” Wanda squeezes your hand and places her palm on your cheek for just a moment, admiring the way you lean into her before she pulls away. “Now get inside and rest for me, please.”

“Okay, I will. Goodnight, Wanda.”

You grab the spare key from its hiding spot and let yourself in, locking the door behind you and watching through one of the front windows as Wanda makes her way back home. Sheri’s loud snores are easily heard over whatever show she fell asleep on, and you carefully close her bedroom door to muffle the sound a bit as you make your way to your room. After changing into something more suitable for bed and grabbing your favorite toy from your suitcase, you turn on your own TV and settle under the covers with thoughts of your temporary neighbors helping you get off.

“You were gone so long I thought you tucked her in for the night,” Natasha greets Wanda as she comes in, and she laughs.

“Not yet, but we’ll get there.” Wanda approaches Natasha slowly and places her hands on her shoulders, taking her time until she can lock their fingers together. “I’ve never known you to be jealous before.”

“Well I did want a bit more time with her but she can’t be rushed. You’re right; she seems very sweet and…obedient.”

“Does that mean we can keep her?” Wanda blinks rapidly with a little pout and cheers when Natasha nods. “You won’t regret it, I promise. We’re going to train her so well.”

“I’m guessing that means you already have a plan to get her to stay.”

-

The next morning, you head into the bathroom to shower and go through your whole routine while replaying last night in your head. You finally resurface once you’re fully dressed, genuinely surprised when Sheri isn’t plating breakfast or waiting with her car keys in hand to go pick something up.

“Sher-bear, you’re the early riser in our duo,” you tease as you head toward her bedroom. “And you’re always hungry in the morning so why aren’t you–”

You cut yourself off with a gasp as you open her door, met with the startling scene of glass covering her twisted bedsheets, knocked in from the broken window. What scares you even more is the couple of spots on the carpet stained with either smeared or drops of blood. You run back to your room and grab your phone to call the police, deciding you’ll feel safer doing so in the presence of two Avengers. You’re banging frantically on their front door in less than a minute, not caring how crazy you look with tears streaming down your cheeks and staining your sleeve as you attempt to wipe them away.

“Sweet girl, what’s going on?” Wanda immediately questions as she pulls you through the doorway, giving a quick look outside before locking the door behind you. “Are you alright? Where’s Sheri?”

“She’s gone,” you begin sobbing at the mention of your best friend’s name.

“What do you mean she’s gone?” Natasha inquires while entering the room, placing her hands on your shoulders as Wanda rubs your back in an attempt to calm you. “What did you see?”

“I think someone broke in and kidnapped her. The window was smashed in and there was blood on the carpet and a few things knocked over too. I was going to call the police but I thought I should come here first in case someone was still there.”

“You did the right thing by coming to us, love.” Natasha walks out of the room for a second and returns with a gun in hand. “I’ll be right back. Don’t let anyone in while I’m gone.”

“Are you sure I shouldn’t come with you?” Wanda offers, though her arm is wrapped around your shoulders now.

“No, I’ll be fine. She needs protection here in case there is still a lingering threat.”

“Be careful.” Wanda locks the door behind her, adjusting her robe as she returns to you and you can’t help glancing once at her partially covered bare chest. “Come on, let’s get you some tea to calm your nerves a bit.”

Natasha hides her weapon until she’s inside Sheri’s home, approaching her bedroom and assessing it for a moment from the doorway before closing it up again. She pulls on a pair of gloves and unlocks the basement door, heading down the stairs and silently approaching the soundproofed room.

Sheri’s head is leaning back against the same wall that the chair she’s in is resting on, her arms and legs tied to it, eyes and ears covered and mouth gagged. Natasha quickly pours a glass of water and watches a pill dissolve into it before approaching Sheri. She carefully removes the gag and forces her jaw open with a gloved hand, using the water to muffle her panicked cries and shushing her when she chokes slightly.

“We’re gonna need you to stay quiet for just a little bit longer if this is going to work.”

[genopaint]

I'm having a bit of art block at the moment. So I thought this might be a good time to go back and talk about the 3 games I released this year to give them one little bit of love before the year ends!! As well as some thoughts on where they'll be going next year!

First Up: Released August 10th, BOYZ: WORLD WIDE WEST! (x)

 This was a "pseudo-multiplayer" quickdraw game. Make your very own BOY, and battle foes in quickdraw matches! The big draw was using codes from other's wanted posters to duel their BOY in your game!

This was the game I actually planned to make at the start of the year. I had the idea in my head for a bit, and I think it came out pretty good! Sadly very few people actually participated in the #BOYZWWW tag to share their wanted poster. But I stand by this concept! I've got ideas for updates to make to this game in 2023. I would really like to add real back buttons to each option so it's easier to enter codes and build a boy. But I think there's also potential to touch up some menus and make them look more original and less like RPGM menus. I wouldn't hold my breath for it coming out any time soon. But yeah... I do already have a small idea for a sequel to this game! It's a bit more ambitious than I can do at the moment, but I'll keep my mind on it. This was my favorite game I made this year! 

Next: Released November 6th, DaRoach! (x)

A maze running arcade styled game. Play as DaRoach and try to collect gems and treasures! There's a 10 stage arcade ladder with a small story, and an endless mode with various layouts to try and master! 

This game was something I wasn't planning at the start of the year, but randomly I had the idea that I could make a simple arcade game pretty easily. It took a bit to figure out what it should be about and how DaRoach should look, but I think it came out pretty good! This game really needs to get touched up a bit in 2023. Thanks to SumRndmDde's custom menu plugin I can FINALLY add a score present during gameplay. But I also would like to potentially touch up tilesets and gameplay to look and run a little better. I know this sounds silly. But I already have plans for the next 3 DaRoach games. I'm not joking. The whole DaRoach lore is already figured out. 3+4 won't be able to be made soon. But DaRoach 2 isn't entirely out of the question eventually. But I'd still need help to get it done.

Lastly: Released December 13th, FLYTRAP! (x)

FLYTRAP is a simple Game & Watch styled game where you control Marty the Flytrap and stop flies from biting your stem! It's a simple blocker game, jump in front of the flies before they reach the center!

This game was completely spur of the moment. After playing Garden Gaurdian and redrawing old G&W fanart. I realized I could make a GW game pretty easily. And people seemed interested so I sat down and made it quickly over a weekend. I'm still shocked by the love this one got! There's not a whole lot to the game that can be cleaned up in 2023. But I certainly think there's room for improvement with playing on phones. However my main goal is to add additional game modes that make the game harder/slightly different since it's easy to edit. I do have an idea for a sequel to FLYTRAP but it'd be more of the same. Nothing too fancy. I don't know when I'll get around to it but it's one I could even potentially do in RPG Maker. Maybe. We'll see. No promises.

---

And that's all the games I made in 2022! Thank you all so much for your support, and thank you for playing anything I put out there! It all means the world to me! As always, these smaller games are leading up to me finishing Once Upon An Adventure, my full scale RPG. I don't know when it'll will be done. I'm at a point where I'm pushing myself to just be happy with what I am making currently, I want this to be the last round of asset making I do. I don't think it'll be done by 2023. But I'm hoping I might be able to show more videos by then. Currently Im working on the maps! I'm on the second to last chapter for dungeons. Then I can do towns, then hidden areas! Once that's done I can build them all in game, then start working on overworld sprites and then when its all put together I can record footage of maps! There's still a LOT of work to do on Once Upon An Adventure, but please look forward to it and please look forward to more updates in 2022!

I do still plan on doing 1 short game per year. And I have a couple of ideas. I'm thinking of maybe letting people decide which one I should attempt? We'll see. A big goal I have for game making in 2023 is to try and enter some game jams. I've made games in really short times already so I think entering game jams could be a ton of fun. So don't be surprised if you see stuff like that from me. And as always I'm working with @CloudyGamesLLC and @SeafloorGames for various projects. Please check them out!

Once again, thank you all so much for your continued love and support. I hope I can make even cooler things next year! Here's to a great 2023 with many more video games to come!

[unholyhelbig]

Ronancetober Day #2: Vampire/Werewolf

[A/N: I really wanted to go for a pulp horror fiction vibe here. Real Christopher Pike energy... Also, I'm late again and will continue to be so]

Read on Ao3

Summary: Robin gets trapped in the halls of Hawkins High, persued by a group of bloodthirsty vampires.

She didn't know how she ended up here with her back pushed against the short end of a set of puke-green lockers with a wooden stake clenched in her grasp. Robin couldn’t catch her breath, but it didn’t seem to matter as she swallowed down her fear, and tried to regulate the sound of her own blood pulsating past her ears.

Any creature could track her in this state, sweat dripping in the hot air of Hawkins High School. The beginning of silver moonlight flecked through the slatted windows of metal doors. Robin’s eyes had adjusted to the dark- had been well adjusted before this ordeal had started before vampires were released into Roane County.

It sounded crazy to Robin too, even running through her thoughts in the trenches of the battle didn’t make sense. Vampires, blood-sucking demons that were out for blood. Specifically, her blood. She was sure it smelled different, though it dripped red just like the rest of the people around her.

Vampires were inherently stupid. That was something Robin had learned quickly and not from her own family's doomed lineage. They were limited to stalking their prey in the dark of night, just as Robin was limited to her own benefits by the lack of a full moon.

It was a terrible time for Robin to become hyperaware of the history homework she left in her locker. It was subsequently a horrible time for her to notice a light spilling from under the Hawkins Streak.

Robin had walked into a full-force vampire congregation gathered around a rolling projector, drawing a complex plan that looked like a football play. They had all turned, all hissed at her baring their fangs.

She’d excused herself before running as fast as she could, stupidly not towards the doors leading to the parking lot. Robin wasn’t going to give them open space, even if she did have more of a technical advantage in the forest surrounding the school’s property.

The girl ended up in the art room, the only place plastered with windows floor to ceiling, plastered with craft paper to create a sunroom effect during the day. Right now, it bathed the room in red. She had shut herself into an art supply cabinet, crouched and uncomfortable.

“Robin,” Tammy Thompson’s voice sing-songed through the room like the low whistle of the wind. “I know you’re in here.”

She would not break. No matter how hot her former Muppet of a crush looked with fangs in her mouth. Robin’s fingers started to inch against the craft paper, the modeling clay, and the safety scissors. She eventually gripped the closest thing to a weapon- a wooden ruler.

“It reeks of dog in here. I promise I’ll go easy on you.”

Like shit, she would. Robin waited until the girls’ sneakers stopped in front of the cabin. She imagined a perfectly manicured hand towards the cabinet. Robin mustered the most animalistic sound she knew she was capable of.

Tammy Thompson was cold, icy, and dead as she sprung forward and shoved the side corner of the ruler with her wolfish strength into Tammy’s chest. It was easier than she expected, terrifying in all aspects.

Tammy stumbled back a few steps, the small of her back hitting the nearest desk “You bitch.”

She crumbled to ash that sparked a brilliant orange and fizzed like a firecracker before dying to a black in a pile at her feet. Gross. Robin reached down and picked up the only thing that survived of the attack, the ruler that was easy enough to break into a point down the center.

Robin exited into the cold and empty hallway before she heard another noise. It was how she ended up here, with a broken ruler against her palm as the noise of scattering vampires filled her ears.

They had found Tammy, she heard them. Their shock and their anger and their subsequent hunt. She could smell them, their death and their anguish. Robin was still reeling from her freshman crush exploding into dust particles when a cold hand pulled her into the nearest classroom.

Robin swallowed a scream in that moment. She used her strength in the dark science room to mount her attacker, even with her eyes clenched shut in fear. She straddled the figure beneath her, letting out a growl as she raised the pointed ruler about her head.

“Robin,”

She halted at the voice, whispered, and hushed as it vibrated under her. It was so familiar and sounded just about as scared as Robin felt. The tip of her makeshift weapon had just about pierced skin, she nearly shoved it through a still heart.

“Nancy?”

Robin tightened her grip on the broken ruler. It cut into the side of her palm, leaving a cotton candy pink mark. Her mouth was suddenly dry, and all the fight threatened to leave her. Nancy was cold and pale and had a red tint to her usual sharp blue stare.  She was here, and she hadn’t had her throat ripped out by the blood-sucking vampires yet.

It made sense, really. She hadn’t seen Nancy in over a week due to purposed stomach flu that she didn't want to get Robin sick with. She complied and dropped off soup and a few books that she thought Nancy would enjoy. All of it had been in vain (no pun intended).

She pushed herself off the vampire and used the heels of her Doc Martins to press her back flush against the brick wall, under the written-on chalkboard. Nancy propped herself up on her elbows, a broken look on her face.

“It’s not what it looks like, Robin” Nancy’s voice came out as a cracked whisper.

“You’re… one of them.”

She sat up entirely now, holding her hands with her palms towards Robin as if to push the air towards the floor, to calm the situation. “I wanted to tell you, but I had my reasons. Had my orders, really.”

“And when does Nancy Wheeler follow orders?”

“When her life is on the line, Robin. I was backed into a corner, literally.” She swallowed hard and inched closer “Don’t act innocent in all this, you’re hiding something too. I can smell it on you.”

Pain rushed through her. She had lied to Nancy. It wasn’t intentional, it was a mix of embarrassment and fear. It was unfathomable, really- an ancient bloodline that was awakened within her psyche when she reached the tender age of 18. A beast hidden within a woman, now working hand in hand with her. Werewolves were unhinged enough, but add vampires into the mix, and the whole world crumbles.

Nancy was close now. She smelled metallic. She smelled the like the earth. It was masked by the same floral scent that Robin was used to, still there. Still Nancy. She wanted to collapse into her arms, into the cold feeling of her embrace. Instead, she pressed herself harder against the wall, drawing in a shaky breath. It was all too much.

“Robbie,” She tried again, “Listen to me. If I can smell you, so can they. There isn’t much time. We can deal with the whole undead thing later. Right now, I need you to leave, because they will not show mercy.”  

“How?”  

Nancy’s ember eyes darted towards the wooden door that led to the hallway, then to the windows that seeped a silver light in a slatted pattern. She gestured and Robin followed blindly. She would follow Nancy Wheeler anywhere, she realized.

She stood and gripped the base of the window and tugged with minimal effort. The cold night air filled the room and hit Robin’s bones. She shivered, gritting her teeth as Nancy brushed her fingertips against Robin’s bare skin. There was no difference between the temperature outside and her subtle touch.

“I won’t hurt you,” Nancy confirmed before she ripped a solid strip of fabric from the sleeve of Robin’s shirt. “We must make it believable. Now, go. They’re coming.”  

She could hear the fear in Nancy’s words as she propped her foot up on the windowsill and dropped onto the cold grass just in time for the door to the classroom to burst open. The metal hinges rattled. Robin held her breath, held the makeshift stake closer, and clenched her eyes shut.

“Where is she?” Jason Carver’s voice hissed.

“Gone, escape through the window and took off.”

“You’re sure?”

“Pretty damn sure. Put up a hell of a fight but she’s not human, Jason.” Nancy defended, “I’ve already lost my life once this week, I don’t want to make it permanent.”

There was a silence in the room. His sneakers walking across the floor. Robin’s lungs began to burn in protest. The air was too cold for her to feel her toes, her fingers. She didn't stand a chance against the slow beating hearts she heard above her shoulder.

“Right,” He laughed humorlessly. “She’ll be back. She can’t avoid us forever, can she?”

Nancy waited; voice low. “No, not forever.”

[myherowritings]

PART 3. ACCIDENTAL SUGAR DADDY?

SUMMARY. Todoroki Shouto was a wealthy, young CEO who inherited his father’s enterprise. You were a barista at a local cafe who wouldn’t mind some extra cash. One day, Shouto came in during an early morning shift and tipped you such a large sum of money, you were certain it had to have been an accident. To your surprise and complete pleasure: It was not.

PAIRING. ceo!todoroki shouto x barista!reader

WORD COUNT. 2.4k

GENRE. ceo/barista au, fluff, eventual smut

WARNINGS. none in this chapter

A/N. happy new year y’all! :3 i hope you have a good 2021 and here is some flirty ceo!shouto for u to enjoy as we enter the new year hehe ;) thank you for reading and i hope you enjoy! xx sof

SERIES MASTERLIST

© myherowritings — all rights reserved. reposting, modifying, copying, or translating of any kind is not allowed. do not read my writing as asmr. do not plagiarize.

“I heard you dropped by this weekend,” you said as a greeting, a playful smile on your lips. “Looking for me?”

If the tips of his ears didn’t tinge pink, you would have guessed Shouto was completely unaffected by your words. 

“Mn.” He drew his attention away from your gaze and pointedly adjusted his cufflinks. “Good morning to you too.” 

You laughed, accepting you wouldn’t get anything out of your attempt at teasing. “Morning, Shouto. How was your weekend?” 

The cafe was quite busy this hour, but Miyazaki took over the other register to alleviate the stress (though, what she really said was so you and pretty boy—who happened to be rich rich—could talk). Whatever the reason, you were glad for a small break whenever you could get it.

“You could say it was busy,” he replied, sounding a bit tired. For the first time since you met him, you actually noticed how exhausted he looked. You wanted to put cucumbers on his eyes and lay his head down on your lap to coax him to sleep. Nonetheless, he smiled softly at you. “And yours? I hope you were able to have time to rest and relax.”

You nodded. “I just slept a lot and caught up on the shows I missed throughout the week.”

“The real way a weekend should be spent.” 

His voice was teasing but he didn’t sound mocking. Just...somewhat playful. There was something about his tone that made you want to hear it again.

“Something tells me you need a weekend away where you could just relax and do nothing,” you commented, tapping the back of your pen to your chin. “Do you not have any days off at work?” 

He considered this. “Depends what you mean by day off.” 

“If you have to ask that, that probably means you don’t have a day off, huh?” you said with a frown, holding your hand over your chest as you sighed dramatically. “You poor thing. Overworked and tired. Maybe I should steal you away one weekend and get you to just relax.” 

You were only half-serious.

“Maybe you should,” agreed Shouto, sounding full-serious.

“Maybe I will,” you blurted before you could stop yourself. Maybe you could if you actually had his number… Then, feeling shameful you said, “But, ah, anyway, what can I get for you today? We actually have cheese danishes again!”

His face brightened. “You do? I’ll take five dozen.”

With a laugh you took down his order. You really weren’t sure where all these pastries were going when he bought it, but judging from his expression, you figured it must be somewhere good. 

“And for your drink?”

“This time I’ll have a large green tea with almond milk, please.” 

You nodded but tilted your head to the side in question. “No coffee with extra shots of espresso today?” 

“I add too much sugar and creamer to my coffee,” he admitted sheepishly. “And with all the baked goods I’ve been eating I realized I may have had an excess amount of sweets lately.” 

With an understanding laugh you patted his hand that was resting on the counter woefully. “I can definitely relate to that. If too many sweets are bad for you they shouldn’t have made it taste so good.”

Shouto glanced down at where your hands touched, an expression you couldn’t quite discern on his face. Averting your gaze, you quickly pulled your hand back. Was that inappropriate of you? Did he find it too pushy?

“Oh— Sorry about that,” you said, rubbing your elbow with your opposite hand. “Got a bit ahead of myself there.”

“No, it’s fine.” He blinked once. “I didn’t mind.”

Unsure if he meant anything by that and unsure if you were reading too much into things, you simply brushed the topic off and moved on to getting his order in telling him the price. 

“Paying by card again, I’m assuming?” you asked before hitting the appropriate button on the screen.

“Correct.”

By now the sight of the sleek and pretty credit card was one you grew rather fond of as he scanned over the payment terminal and signed his name. Was it weird you wanted to examine his signature more closely? Shouto seemed like the type of person who would have a fancy signature that somehow looked like art. 

As per routine, you told him his order would be ready for pick up at his right and, before he left the register, he thanked you and gave you another $100. 

Did it feel any less strange than the first time he tipped you? Not really, no. But you still weren’t going to complain about a generous tip from a willing customer.

Before he left with his cheese danishes and cup of tea in hand, he stopped by next to you with a small smile. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Y/N.”

You grinned back. “Can’t wait, Shouto!” 

— ✩ —

This went on for a whole other week. By this point, he had given you over $1,000 in tip and you were starting to feel like you should give him something in return despite him assuring you he didn’t expect anything. 

When you told your friends about the nice guy you met while you were working and they asked for the details, the first thing they said in response to your situation was, “Sugar daddy?” 

Before they planted that thought into your head, you just took it as a rich businessman who hated the rich and believed in redistribution of wealth—you couldn’t complain about that. That made him even more appealing, if you must say. But once Kaminari and Ashido whispered those two words, you couldn’t help but see the comparisons. 

You had no issues with sugar daddies or sugar babies; as long as they were two consenting adults, what did it matter to you? It just wasn’t something you were looking for at the time and you didn’t want Shouto to get the wrong impression or involve yourself in something you weren’t ready to. 

As you commuted to work for your next morning shift, you told yourself today was the day you’d thank him one final time for the tips, but tell him you couldn’t accept anymore. You were sure he’d be understanding but you also hoped it wouldn’t deter him from coming to see you. That was the last thing you’d want. 

“Mrs. Miyazaki,” you said between customers. “When Shouto comes in, do you think I can step away from the register to talk to him for a little? I promise it’ll be brief!”

She waved her hand dismissively. “That’s not a problem. Are you finally going to ask him out or something?”

You scratched the back of your neck. “Or something, yeah.” 

Thankfully, by the time Shouto arrived today, it was later than he normally came, meaning rush hour was almost dying down. 

“Good morning! Someone’s a little late today,” you teased. “Overslept?” 

“I wish,” he sighed wistfully. “I had a meeting early this morning and it just ended. Didn’t have a chance to pick up some coffee or pastries beforehand.” 

You frowned. “I’m sorry to hear that. I hope whoever was hosting the meeting at least provided you guys drinks and snacks!” 

He paused. “He did, but… I just thought yours were better.” 

Smiling at the compliment, you preened. “Well, I can’t say I’m not surprised. And I’m glad you were able to drop by still. Would’ve missed you too much otherwise.”

Again, you were only half-serious.

“Hm. I would’ve missed you too.”

And again, he seemed full-serious. Not that you minded. 

After taking his order and watching him pay, you pulled him to the side, looking over at your boss so she knew what was going on. She gave you a brief nod as you turned your attention to Shouto. 

A lapse of silence went by and he spoke up, “Did you have something you wanted to say?” 

“Yeah, actually.” You wrung your fingers nervously, hoping you wouldn’t say anything to offend him since you knew his actions were coming from a kind place. “I just wanted to say… I’m not really looking for a sugar daddy right now.”

He blinked once. Then twice. “Pardon?” 

You stared at him, unsure what to say. 

“I— Sorry. I wasn’t… It’s not my intention to be a...sugar daddy either.” Shouto’s face flushed a bright pink that made your own cheeks warm up in response. 

“But the—the money? I just… I guess I thought…” You winced.

So he wasn’t trying to pick up a sugar baby… Well, this was awkward. But regardless, you think you’ve gotten close enough to him to the point where it would feel weird accepting money from him. 

“I’m sorry if I was unclear. It really is just a tip to show appreciation for your service here.” 

You shook your head. “No! Sorry, that makes sense! My friends just said… And then I…” you trailed off, feeling a million times more flustered than when you started. “Sorry about that. The sugar daddy mishap aside, I still wanted to say that I really appreciate the tips you gave, but I don’t think I can accept them anymore.” 

Slowly, he nodded, adjusting the collar of his dress shirt. “I understand. Did something happen?”

“No, nothing happened!” you were quick to assure. “I really am thankful, but… I think we’ve gotten too close for me to be comfortable accepting that much money, you know?”

Shouto tilted his head to the side, listening intently. 

“Like,” you tried to explain, fiddling with your apron, “over the past few weeks I just think we’ve gotten to know each other more and I think of you as a friend of sorts now.” You peered at him through your lashes, hoping your words were making sense. “I think as a relationship develops—for me, at least—adding money into the mix can cause weird power imbalances if not communicated properly. And I just don’t want that for us.” 

He thought through your words for a while before agreeing. “I get what you mean. I wouldn’t want to unintentionally make you feel like you owe me anything, so if you’re not comfortable with it, I can stop.” 

“Thanks, Shouto,” you said with a beam, glad he was so receptive. Really though, what else did you expect? From your interactions with him you took him to be kindhearted and open. Of course he wouldn’t be upset over this. “But just to be clear, this doesn’t mean you should stop coming! Right? I don’t want to stop being your friend or anything!” 

With a small laugh, he nodded. “Sure. I wouldn’t want to part with my favorite cafe. And I’d like to keep being friends as well.”

Those words warmed your heart. You really were nervous about this confrontation earlier; you didn’t want voicing your opinion to mean ending your friendship. (Although, if you sharing what you were comfortable with was enough to end a relationship, then you supposed it was bound to be a toxic and stifling one in the long run and it was good to know in the beginning to end it before it could grow.) Turns out, however, that you didn’t even need to worry about that. He was understanding and sweet and you were glad to have gotten this out of the way.

“Well, as new friends,” you said, gently nudging his side, “maybe we should get to know each other more? Exchange numbers… Hang out outside of this cafe…” You ran through some suggestions, almost bouncing on your feet in excitement. “I mean, I know you’re always so busy and might not have much free time to hang out. But— If you’re ever free one weekend…” 

“I’d enjoy that,” he cut in, saving you from blabbering your mouth off and accidentally embarrassing yourself. “Didn’t you say you’d steal me away from work to relax? I’m still holding you to that.” 

The beginnings of a smirk formed on his face as he looked at your flustered expression. Was he teasing you?

You huffed, pretending to be insulted by his playful mocking. “Guess I’ll really have to do it then.” 

“Guess so.”

“Maybe you should give me your number first so we could plan it.” 

“Okay.”

He handed you his phone and you handed him yours, both of your adding your numbers to the contact list. Smiling, you held the phone in front of the two of you to take a contact picture of yourself for Shouto’s phone. To your complete surprise, he laughed before promptly following suit and taking a selfie for his contact image. 

“Cute,” you said when he handed you back your phone. 

“You too.” 

Placing your device back in your pocket, you looked at him, hand on hip. “Since when did you become such a smooth-talker? Am I going to have to guard my heart now?” 

His only response was a shrug, but you could see hints of a smile playing on his face. The two of you seemed to be smiling a lot lately, you couldn’t help but notice. 

“I should probably let you go to work now—and I should go back to mine.” You gestured to the growing line at the front of the store. Your manager looked like she had things under control, but you didn’t want to take advantage of her kindness. “You should text me later though. If you want.”

“I’ll do that,” Shouto promised, picking up his drink and pastry boxes from the side counter. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Y/N. And… I’ll message you soon.” 

As you watched him leave the store, you were certain you had a silly look on your face as you stared in a trance. 

“I’ll turn my phone off silent just for you!” you said to his back, hoping he understood what a momentous occasion this was. Your phone was always on silent (unless you were playing a game, of course). But for Shouto, you could handle hearing the obnoxious ringtone and text tone. 

With an amused expression he nodded before waving goodbye.

Later on that day, at the end of your shift, you noticed a new message from a certain someone that made your stomach flutter.

Shouto: Hi there. It’s Shouto :)

You never knew those four simple words would be enough to keep the grin plastered on your face up until the moment your head hit your pillow to fall asleep. But, damn— Were you glad that happened to be the case. 

a/n: whY WAS SHOUTO AND Y/N EXCHANGING NUMBERS SO CUTE idk that scene got me all blushy and :DDD HFJDKSF like taking a selfie with shouto and getting his number? only goal in life BFHFGF,, also y/n said no more tips how we feeling? ;o 

what to expect in the next part:

an unwanted visitor ಥ_ಥ

shouto has a...proposition for y/n 

FLIRTING FLUFF SO MUCH CUTENESS U MIGHT CRY

y/n struggles with their fEeLiNGs~

[roger-that-cap]

wildest dreams

witch!wanda x reincarnated!reader 

summary: wanda had walked around the earth for centuries with no magic and hardly any soul left after losing her soulmate. she thought that her lover would never return and that the only reunion they would have would be in the afterlife, but a run-in with bucky changes everything after he insists that he met the long gone y/n at a fountain in the park. 

yet another au by me... 

word count: around 6.5k?

imma tag one person bc she gets upset when she isn’t tagged- and idk if anyone else would actually be interested?

@teenwonder

also this picture is not mine, and the dividers are by @firefly-graphics !!

without further ado, it’s almost 6 in the morning but i give you this!!

She held you tight, fingers digging into your skin as she trembled above you. The rose bushes were rustling in the wind next to you both, the sweet smell of the flowers contrasting with the moment. You were halfway gone already, eyes far off but trying to swim back to the surface, wanting to look at her one last time before the inevitable happened. 

  “S…” you tried to say, but she hushed you immediately, tears falling down on your face and mixing with your own. You shook her head at her as hard as you could, begging for her to let you continue. “Say you’ll remember me,” you ground out, fingers tightening around her hand. 

  “What?” Wanda asked, voice already thick with grief as she tried to decide whether or not it was better to keep the knife lodged between your ribs inside of you.

“When I come back-” you cut yourself off by coughing up blood, and Wanda didn’t even wince when it splattered on her cheek. “Back for you, promise that you’ll remember me.” 

 “Darling,” Wanda whispered back, her voice cracking as she bent over and rested her head on your stomach for a moment, hiding her sob. She could feel her magic tingling inside of her; under her skin, in her bones, dancing on her fingertips. “I wish I knew- I wish I just knew how-”

  “Please.” You said, a desperate look in your eyes as you halted her words, already knowing what Wanda wanted. But natural magic was nothing to mess with. She sobbed again with her lips pressed together, no sound escaping her. You squeezed her hand tighter as the sun started on its routine descent, basking the two of you in an orange glow that you would have stopped to admire in any other moment in time. But Wanda would grow to hate that shade of orange with every breath in her. “Please.” It would always remind her of the sound of your begging, voice reaching for something that she couldn’t see. 

Maybe it was the desperation in your voice, or the way that she just knew that you were well within your last moments, because she looked up at you one last time. “Of course I’ll remember you, darling. I couldn’t even dream of forgetting you.” There was a wheezing sound that came from your chest as you cracked a bloody smile, and then you gave one last squeeze before you looked away from her, your soul settling in the afterlife. 

  Wanda Maximoff would never forget it. Suddenly, her previously  irrational fear of losing her magic became real, but that feeling didn’t even come close to the one she got when you grew lifeless in her arms. 

Ever since you knew what a normal person was supposed to be like, you had identified that you, in fact, were not the normal person that you were probably supposed to be. Normal people didn’t daydream to the point where it felt like their bodies weren’t in the present anymore. Normal people didn’t have birthmarks under their ribs that aced and burned. Normal people didn’t feel out of touch with their world, like they weren’t even meant to be in the century they were in. Normal people didn’t feel like they were searching for something tirelessly, something just under their noses. And normal people surely didn’t dream of the same set of hands, same pair of eyes, or the same voice over and over again, a new setting every time, but always the same, faceless person. You either drew the same faceless person or rose bushes, and every sketch book you ever had was full of them. 

At first, you were sure that you were going insane. Every time you closed your eyes, you would see a flash of reddish brown hair, or the same set of eyes, or the same pair of pale hands. You kept seeing this person without ever seeing a face for nights at a time before you went to see a therapist, who just ended up telling you that worrying about it was only going to make it worse, whatever it even was. But eventually, you learned to get used to it. 

Acceptance turned into expectancy. You went to sleep knowing that there was going to be a pair of hands accompanied by the same slender fingers as always before you, sometimes intertwined with your own. You knew that there was going to be a set of eyes on you, watching you intently with no ace to go with them. You knew that you would hear whispers of the same voice, speaking so clearly in a language you didn’t even come close to understanding, and soon, you were craving to see and hear those things. And wanting to see them led to something that you never told your therapist; drawings. 

You drew nearly every day under the sky, trying to find different park benches to see the sun rise and set at different angles for inspiration. You loved the sky, moon and stars alike, but there was something special about sunrises and sunsets. Sunrises and sets both meant new beginnings to you, out with the old and in with the new, and each rise and fall filled you with a strange feeling of nostalgia. You were watching the sunset on a park bench by yourself, a sketchbook sitting on your lap as you held an idle pencil, still thinking about the way you wanted to draw the hands. The birthmark between your ribs started to tingle, letting you know that it was about to burn again. That damn birthmark. You dropped the pencil and scratched at it, trying to beat the annoying feeling at its own game. You cursed the mark, but your eyes didn’t leave the sky, and you noticed your heart swelling in your chest, faint despair in the pits of it, churning around like the middle of the deep sea. 

 You shook your head and put your pencil in your hand again, brain not even having to work hard at all to see the features of the faceless person who was in your every dream. 

Even before she ever met you, Wanda didn’t sleep well. She would toss and turn for at least an hour before she finally found some temporary, flimsy form of peace. Her sleep was always light and she hardly ever had dreams, which was customary for a woman like her at the time- an un-blossomed witch. 

It was hard for her to remember the time where she didn’t have magic, but that time certainly existed. It lasted nearly thirty years. She never aged a day past twenty one, time moving past her without a care in the world. She was stuck right there, no magic except for the little bit in her bones that was keeping her young. And then she met you. 

You were the person that kicked her magic into gear. You were her kindred soul, her other half and the power to her magic. Meeting you had flung her right into the world of magic and spells, things that she only watched others do, but even as she was introduced to an entirely different world, she could remember only really wanting you. Her heart and soul called to you far louder and stronger than spells called to her eager mind. When she met you, it all fell into place. It was an easy love, one that was never going to be disputed or questioned, and loved it. She was prepared to move heaven, earth, and the gods for you, if she had to. Your arrival into her life had caused her to finally blossom. 

But now, she had bloomed and flourished and wilted all the same, and she was just waiting to decompose. 

“Have hope,” was all that Bucky, a warlock who had been tortured enough in his own way, would tell her. “Have hope that something good will come to you, and it will.” 

She never had the heart to tell him that good things hardly came to those who waited. He himself was a product of waiting, and it had served him well. Before he met his other half, he was taken by a rival clan and experimented on with spells that were so far past illegal that they made the casual witch shudder. Eventually, he was broken out and the rival clan was defeated, but he returned to them as an empty shell of a man. But then, Steve came, and then the man was nothing but a ball of light. His magic grew to be strong and so did Steve’s, and together they became known as some of the strongest practitioners of magic in the world. 

 But what did Wanda have to hope for when you were gone? What did she have to wake up for and smile at when she knew that she had buried you hundreds of years ago? It wasn’t even about the magic. She couldn’t care less about the way she felt the energy leave her- and it was dramatic- leaving in a singular burst of light the second you left. She only knew that you were gone, and that was the only thing that mattered, and it seemed to be the only thing that she even really felt. 

Well, she did feel one other thing. Exhaustion. Exhaustion caused by the lack of you by her side. And exhaustion was exactly why she assumed that she was hallucinating when she felt a small tug at her heart, in a part of her brain that had been dormant for years and years. She shook her head and tried to take her thoughts away from you and the nagging feeling in her gut. 

“Oh, no…” you exclaimed, voice tapering out into a whine as you watched the ruined paper sink deeper and deeper into the fountain, a fist clenching at your side in disappointment when you realized how many hours were lost, just like that, and then even tighter when you realized that part of you wasn’t even truly upset about the time spent on the ruined art. You were mostly upset that you lost the only vision of the hands that you had during the daytime. 

You were on your knees, sleeves still all the way down as you reached into the water frantically, causing the paper to move even further away. You weren’t even worried about your sketchbook that had fallen open onto the pavement, more focused on the rapidly deteriorating piece of paper. You hardly even noticed the man who knocked into you talking, trying his hardest to make the situation better. “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, is there anything I can do?” 

“I mean,” you breathed out, taking the nearly disintegrated paper from the water and grimacing. When you realized that the man was fumbling to say something from behind you, celery apprehensive over the fact that you were upset, you took a short breath and turned around, giving him a small smile. He had dark brown hair that was cut short and crystal blue eyes that were striking, but you knew that they held thousands of stories by looking just once.  He was holding your sketchbook, and by the way he was gripping it tightly, you could tell that he had flipped through it for a second. “It’s just a drawing. I guess I can make another one.” 

  His eyes widened. You saw his jaw slacken and his neck stretch out, as if he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. He blinked three times, and his parted lips trembled for a second before he slammed them shut. You cocked a brow at him, your sadness about losing the drawing being replaced by a weak feeling of uneasiness. “Sir?” 

  “Knew it.” His face was clear from any type of emotion as he watched yours, and when you opened your mouth to ask him if he was okay, a grin spread across his face. “I’m Bucky, what’s your name?” You furrowed your brows at him, asking what the hell had just occurred without saying a single word. “I’m sorry, you just looked really familiar.” 

 Just like that, you smiled. You knew that feeling, you felt like you got deja vu far too often to be normal. You hated when people made you feel strange for it, you always had, so you tried your best to ignore it with him. “You’re fine, don’t worry. I’m Y/N.” You extended your dry hand for him to shake it. He stared at it for a moment, and then with an eagerness that made you smile, he shook your hand. 

“‘I’m Bucky.” 

  For a moment, you could have sworn that you had done more tha just seen him before. Could have sworn that you had shaken his hand, met him before, been at the receiving end of his blinding yet somewhat shy smile. It flashed through you warm and bright, and you cleared your throat before pulling your hand away and realizing you had held it for too long. You cleared it again when you saw something flash in his eyes, a weak smile lifting on your lips.

“It’s not her.” 

Wanda was furious. She was insulted more than anything, really, angry that Bucky could even mistake the light of you for someone else. She knew that you would never grace the earth with your presence again, and she was so used to the fact that she was going to have to die before seeing you again. And for one of her closest friends to try to convince her that you were back? 

 “She would have already found me.” And Wanda believed that with her whole heart. You had asked her so long ago that you remember her, like she could ever forget. Your scent was so flowery that whenever she walked past a growing garden that she smelled you, your smile was so bright that she saw it in the way the rays of sun came down on the earth. She heard your laugh in the chirping of the birds every morning, and she saw your playfulness in the running waters of the stream by the cabin. She could never forget you, because everything was traced back to you. And you would never return without finding her. 

“I don’t think she even knows it yet, but she is looking for you.” Bucky insisted, stepping forward and receiving Wanda’s burning glare while Steve stepped to the side and let it happen. “I bumped into her and she dropped her sketchbook. I saw her drawings- she drew your eyes.” 

  Wanda’s heart skipped a beat. “What?” 

“She dropped the drawing of hands in the water, but I saw she had drawn eyes that looked just like yours, hair the same shade as yours, even drawn the necklace you used to wear. She draws roses, too. I swear to everything above, it’s her.” 

She could feel herself getting warm, the sort of emotions stirring inside of her that had the potential to turn into a singular weapon. The thought of a rose bush made her sick to her stomach. “It’s not her.” 

“You forget that I knew her, too,” Bucky stated, and Wanda’s desolation was replaced by some ancient feeling of possessiveness. “I could never forget her face, and that was it right there. That was her face, without a shadow of a doubt, And her voice-” 

Wanda’s face curled into a snarl. “Stop talking about her.”  

“Hey, Wanda, take a deep breath,” Steve cut in, ever the mediator, but Bucky was hardheaded. If he thought something needed to happen, he was the one to push for it to happen, and he needed her to see. 

 “She looks the same as she did the day she left.” Wanda let out a choked noise. For a second, all she could picture was her lover dying by the blooming rose bushes in the sunset, ruining two of the most beautiful things in life at once. The third (but first) was you, but not even your horrible death could taint Wanda’s memory of you. You would forever be the brightest and most beautiful thing to grace the earth. “I got her number, we’re meeting at a coffee shop a few blocks away.” 

“Leave her alone.” Wanda said through gritted teeth, tears welling up in her eyes. When she saw the brunet’s eyes widen and his mouth drop open, she spoke before he could get a word in. “Just stay away from her, Bucky.” 

All she could think about was your death. The way you choked on your own blood. The way you cried and looked up at her, but still managed to smile. And as she was consumed by rage and memories, the only other thought in her mind was that she was yours and you were here, and that she couldn’t save you then. But she was surely going to preserve your memory from Bucky’s mouth. 

  “I know you feel it coming back. You haven’t felt it in so long, but it’s warm, right? It’s powerful. You always were the strongest, and you’re not dormant any longer. Stop lying to yourself and depriving yourself of love, Wanda. You know Y/N-”

  She saw red. Red as red as the fires that burned in the magma underneath the ground, as red as embers in a fire. “You don’t get to say her name.” She saw so much red, so much hot anger that hardly covered her sadness, that she didn’t even see the way that she had her hand out red coming from her palm as she lifted Bucky right off of the wooden floor of their shared home. “You don’t get to talk about her.” There was a warbling noise in her ears, whispers that sounded like her name, getting louder and louder until she finally realized it was Steve trying to get her attention. 

  “Wanda.” 

Instantly, she dropped her arm and watched Bucky fall to the ground, landing in a crouched position. She watched him catch his breath on the ground. She opened her mouth to apologize, to say that she felt terrible and that she had no idea what happened, what took over her, but she was stopped by the brilliant smile that came onto Bucky’s face. 

  “You used magic.” He said, slowly and steadily, not a hint of hesitance or animosity in his eyes or voice. Instead, he seemed more proud than anything. “You can’t deny this now, Wanda.” 

She was hyperventilating, the pain in her chest intensifying as she tried without any results to get the right amount of air in her lungs. She felt her knees hit the ground before she knew that she did, her hands covering her face as she sobbed into herself. Her heart ached, tugging in so many different directions as her brain fought to rationalize what everything meant. She had used magic,  and that meant that you were back, in one way or another. She was in disbelief. She was in despair. She was in shock. 

“I know you do, I know you do,” It was Steve’s arms around her, and Steve’s voice in her ear, and she realized that she had been saying I miss her, I miss her, over and over again until the words jumbled. “We know you do, Wanda. We miss her too.” 

But he didn’t understand. He hadn’t lost Bucky since he had found him. He hadn’t walked the earth for centuries after losing the only thing that mattered to him as an empty shell of the person he used to be. He would never understand, but that wasn’t his fault. In fact, she prayed that he would never understand. 

“I’m sorry I approached you like that,” Bucky said, crouching down and hugging her just as Steve was, enclosing her into a hugging circle. They were coven, related by magic, and just being around them made her tears subside. “But you know that I would have never said anything like that unless I was one thousand percent sure. I would never do anything to hurt you, Wanda. All I want is for you to be happy. And I know that I found her.” 

And how could he want anything but the best for her? He knew her just as much as Steve did. Just as much as she probably knew herself. He and Steve were the ones who stormed the coven that took you from her by her side, and they were the ones that helped her send them to their graves. They supported her through thick and thin, through revenge and peace, and mostly, they loved you almost as much as she did. Why would Bucky lie? 

Wanda blinked, staring down at her hands in fear and wonder as her heart beat started to get away from her. Steve’s warm hand landed on her shoulder, and she flinched from the sudden touch after such a rush of power. 

“I think you should go with him, Wanda.” Her heavy breathing was all that filled the air for a moment. “Just take a look at her from outside so you can leave if he was wrong without anyone knowing, but you should at least try. I think Buck’s right.” 

Wanda’s breaths were still labored. Her hands trembled as she moved hair from her eyes, and her lip quivered before she found the strength to mutter a few words. “Will she- will she remember?” 

“I think she will,” Steve said softly. “But she’s probably just a human. It may take more than just seeing you for her to remember everything.” 

 Her eyes were wet with tears, and her heart was so big with warmth and need that she was scared that it would burst open at the seams. But she was even more terrified to lose the idea of you. Slowly and shakily, she nodded, her head bobbing up and down as she sealed her own fate. “I’ll go.” She saw Steve give her his fatherly and supportive smile, small yet full. “I’ll see her.” 

You didn’t know how you were gently swindled into giving Bucky your number. You knew that it was nothing but friendly, but he was so charming that you felt like you could never not know him. In fact, it felt like you already did know him. He said something about maybe commissioning an artwork of yours, and of course that excited you. You were going to meet him at a coffee shop, in a public place even though you weren’t the slightest bit afraid of him. But something felt different. 

 It started once you got into your car. You were driving to get to the shop when tingles came down your spine, and bumps raised on your arms, like someone was whispering against your skin. You started to feel warmth come and go in waves, brushing against your mind and then retreating again. You shook off all of the strong feelings as you turned your car off, parked in front of the coffee shop while the music from your speakers filled the silence, soft piano music that was perfect for the weather. 

  It was drizzling, the kind of weather that you liked to call a “lover’s drizzle” because of how often it was seen in romantic scenes. Scenes of confession, of reunion, of desperation between two lovers- more often than not, they had the mild rain to stand in. You turned the music down before shutting your car off and then stepping out, closing the door and locking it immediately before walking briskly to the entrance of the coffee shop with your recent drawings in hand. 

 Bucky wasn’t there when you arrived. In fact, hardly anyone was there besides the few employees, who smiled at you when you entered but otherwise fell back into conversation amongst themselves, which was fine with you. There was one beefy blonde man who was sitting with a laptop and a ball cap on. He glanced up for a moment and then took a double take, blinking hard at you with a star struck look on his face, and then he shot his gaze back down and went back to typing.

You sat down at a table for two, the only type of table that was there besides the long, awkward study tables that they had set up in the center of the room. You would much rather take the intimate setting of a two-seater than to sit in the middle of the shop, so you did just that. You flipped through your work, looking at it closely now that you had the time. He had mentioned something about possible portrait work for a friend of his, so you naturally brought most of the drawings that you had done with hands, arms, eyes, hair, nearly everything that was the closest to your heart. You rested your palm on top of them and watched your fingers trace the slender ones that you had drawn in what felt like by memory at the time, like you were just remembering the way an old friend’s hands used to look. You peeled that one back and looked into the eyes, the strangest and prettiest light green color that made your heart pound every time you looked at it. You took a deep breath in.

  “That’s gorgeous.” You jumped in your seat as the chair in front of you pulled out from under the table, and there was the charming brunet that you had met by the fountain, giving you the same welcoming smile that he first granted you. You smiled back without hesitation, your heart warming at the sight. “You sure can draw.” 

  “I try,” you joked, your grin nearly splitting your face. “Do you drink coffee?” 

“Nah,” he said, shrugging his shoulders. “But I like tea, though.” You gave him a thoughtful look. 

“Are you into herbal healing?” 

You could have sworn that there was some sort of excitement in his eyes, but you weren’t sure enough by the time he opened his mouth again. “Yes, actually! What, does it look like I’m into it?” 

“No,” you answered, and it was true. Bucky was huge. He had the kind of build that intimidated other guys at the gym, the kind that made athletes jealous. He looked like the typical meathead, but he was sweeter than you could have imagined. But he looked nothing like a man who would be into herbal healing. “Just a guess.” 

“Pretty good guess,” he mused, and you grinned back. Your head was in the clouds of some strange deja vu when he asked you if you wanted something, and the entire exchange of whether or not you were going to pay was on the back burner as you sifted through your thoughts. By the time he came back, you noticed that you must have told him that you liked hot chocolate, and that he must have paid. You scolded him before he sat back down, waving you off. It was silent for a few moments as you looked out of the window, the rain still steadily working through the atmosphere. The cup was comfortingly warm. 

“Can I ask you something?” 

  With any other man, you would have immediately told him no, or at least have your guard up. But there was just something deep down, so buried that it was faint, but it was there, that told you that he was nowhere even close to being a threat. “Yes.”

 He nodded, taking a sip of his tea and then putting his cup down gently before giving you an intense look. “Who’s the girl?”  

You frowned. “What girl?” 

He raised a singular brow. “The one you draw.” 

Your breath hitched in your throat. You blinked twice, and then tilted your head to the side. “I don’t draw just one person,” you said slowly, the lie dragging its way out of your mouth and through your teeth. “They’re different people.” 

“Oh,” he said, but the smirk on his face told you that he knew you were lying to him and to yourself. You sipped your drink and something tugged at you, telling you to look out of the window and into the rain again, just one more time before you spilled your guts about seeing things- and then something caught your eye. A flash of a familiar reddish-brown. You turned your full body to look that way, and once you did, you nearly dropped your cup. 

  There was a woman staring back at you, eyes wide and full of so much emotion that the artist in you wanted to rush to make an unworthy attempt at capturing it. Her lips were parted in pure shock, but you were watching them tremble even from far away. She was getting slightly damp in the rain, but she stood there like it didn’t even matter, just locking eyes with you and sending your heart rate through the roof. When your eyes finally came back to hers after looking at her for what felt like the quickest eternity, you gasped. You knew those eyes. 

  If you weren’t so deep into gazing at the woman stuck behind the glass, you would have noticed the pleased and content look on Bucky’s face, and the look that he gave the big blond sitting with a ball cap on all by himself. You would have noticed the way that the blond man was turning his body towards your table, watching with the same amount of anticipation as Bucky was. You tried to understand why she looked so familiar, why she was scratching the part of your brain that always tried to convince you that you were much older than twenty something- and then it hit you. 

  You had been drawing this woman. And you had been thinking about her ever since you knew how to think. It was just the first time you were ever seeing the full picture. “I-” you muttered, eyes stuck on her and the way she looked like she was about to topple over from emotions. The words got stuck in your own throat as you weakly tried to get your mind to take you back to the conversation. “I- excuse me. I have to- I’ll be back- excuse me.” Your chair made a loud noise as you stood from the table in a haste, pushing the door open and walking towards the woman who was still standing on the sidewalk, dumbstruck. 

Before you even knew you were outside and into the rain, you were standing not even four steps away from the woman, who was now looking at you with an incomprehensible look on her face. You couldn’t even feel the rain on you. All you could feel was her gaze and the warmth that was settling in your stomach and chest, and the same intense familiarity that was hitting you when you looked at Bucky. But it was so much stronger. 

“I-” you frowned, taking a step closer and resisting the urge to reach out and touch her. “Do I know you? Have we met?” You had to have met. You had seen her in your sleep, in your daydreams, in your sketchbook. And still, you never could have imagined how beautiful she was. 

She was silent. 

“I know this is random and that I just bum rushed you, but, did we go to school together or something?” You were embarrassed. You had never begged someone to remember you before, but this woman was different. She hadn’t said a word to you, and you didn’t even know her name, but you were enraptured. You swore you knew her. You swore you saw her eyes glaze over for a second. 

“You really don’t remember, do you?” Her voice struck something familiar in your chest, something warm and comforting. It was so familiar, so far back in your memory that it felt like home. Her accent, her inflection, the way she spoke slowly yet deliberately. It was all there in your mind, but you just couldn’t figure out how you knew it so well. “You don’t remember who I am?” 

 That had you closing your mouth. You tilted your head to the side at what could have been a hostile question, but her tone made it sad. Did you forget a high school friend? “Oh, um, I know you from somewhere, but I can’t really-” 

 “Think.” The desperation in her voice made your knees shake. If she were anyone else, you would have told her to go away, but you couldn’t. You didn’t want her to go away. But you couldn’t quite place her either, even though your own heart was screaming at you to remember. 

  “I’m sorry,” you said, a hurt expression on your face. You braved yourself to leave, taking a deep breath and giving her a weak smile that embarrassed you even further. “This was weird of me. I’ll just-” 

 She was reaching for you. Time started to run slower as her pale arm extended towards you, long fingers that you had committed to memory and to paper a thousand times outstretched. Your mouth dropped open ever so slightly as you stood in place for a second, body still until you subconsciously leaned forward, your nerves buzzing under your skin. 

  For a second, the only thing you could do was look at the point where her skin touched yours. 

  You had seen magic before. You had seen it in movies and at theme parks and when miracles happened, but nothing ever like when her skin touched yours. You swore that the warmth that your body had been feeling kicked in even stronger, surrounding you in comfort. Her hand was wrapped around your arm, gentle yet begging, firm yet wishing all the same for something you couldn’t quite see yet. You looked up and into her eyes, the eyes you had drawn and seen so many times, and then you saw it. 

   You saw it in more than flashes. They were coming in at the speed of light, but somehow you were able to catch every moment and every feeling that came along. You heard her voice as clear as day, ringing with laughter. You saw the two of you attempting to skip stones. You saw her enchanting your stones behind your back to make you think you had actually done it. You saw her mouth brushing over your cheeks, your mouth, your forehead. You could feel her hands on you, holding you, protecting you, cherishing you all the same. You could remember the way that you felt when you saw her standing in traditional witch’s clothing, being inducted into her coven as a blossomed witch. You saw everything and nothing, and you remembered it all. 

Wanda. 

A strangled sound escaped your body, so feral that it scared you, but you didn’t care. You pulled her forward, your head clashing against her chest. You could feel her shaking, like she wanted nothing more than to hold you just as tightly, but she was hesitating. “Wanda,” you called out, hugging her tighter, and then, like something in the universe stretched too far and then snapped right back into place, she was returning the embrace. 

  “I thought I had lost you forever,” she said, her voice hollow yet so full, so expressive. “I lost you, darling.” 

  The memories were all there, like all it took was a touch, but you were still coping with the knowledge. You had been murdered. Murdered by witch hunters, way back when witches were known and feared. That had to have been hundreds of years ago, you knew it. But still, your focus was on Wanda. It always would be on Wanda, forever and always. Just like hers was on you. 

“You didn’t,” you managed to say, your own voice thick with emotion as you buried your face into her neck, finally feeling the texture of the hair that you tried so hard to get right. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere ever again.” 

“I’m sorry,” she said, suddenly sobbing in your arms. You had no idea how you weren’t being interrupted in the crowded streets, but when you took a look back inside of the cafe to see the men who you so clearly remembered as Steve and Bucky, you knew it had something to do with them and their fulfilled smiles. “I wasn’t able to save you. I let you die, and I’m so sorry, darling. I’m so sorry.” 

  Her words brought you back to the present. “Wanda, no. No, no, no.” You wanted to pull away and look at her face, but the second you started to, she held onto you even tighter. You leaned your head back onto her chest. “It wasn’t your fault. There was no way any of us could have known, and no way that you could have saved me. It was beyond us.” 

  “Nothing should have ever been beyond us.” She argued softly. “I’m so sorry.” 

“But it was,” you said. “And now it’s behind us. Don’t apologize, Wanda.” You wiggled around and got free enough to look up at her teary face. “I may not have recognized you, but now that I do, I can’t believe that I ever forgot you.”

   “A new life will do that to you.” 

“Is it really a new life if I remember everything?” You said softly, the rain long gone as you stood with each other, bodies nearly molded together with how close you were. 

  She pulled away to look down at you, her eyes and overall expression tense, and then there was a look that you recognized from a long time ago. It was a look of sweet desire. You closed the cap between the two of you, pressing your lips to hers in a way that proved that you were both two lost souls who had wandered their way back to their other halves. 

“It can be whatever you want it to be, darling.” Her lips brushed your again, soft and tender and eager for more touch. “As long as you let me be in it.” 

[venusiangguk]

may we see the fight tae oc scene pls pls please!!! u can delete later🤔🤔🤔🤔😳😳😳😳 i’m really curious. i mean ofc u don’t have to. still 😧🙃

idealizations concerning real life relations: deleted scene

>>pairing: jungkook x reader / icrlr!couple

>>genre: fwb, angst, rated PG

>>word count: 2.5k

>>warnings: alcohol, implied smut

>>notes: this is a deleted scene from icrlr, that i omitted simply because of the length of the final fic!! feel free to skip or ignore, it doesn't change anything, but since u guys are curious about it, i'll post it as a lil ty for helping me hit that milestone <3 it takes place after the tattoo party scene, and before the lecture scene.

this does NOT provide an alternative ending.

>>summary: taehyung tries to make you see things for what they really are, but it's hard to see through the rose colored glasses.

Winter break has been long awaited and it is finally, finally here. The snow has coated the ground thick, making the town look like a winter wonderland. The air is sharp and cold but not to a miserable extent. Just chilly enough to bundle up, to hold a hand a little tighter and soak up their warmth.

Your favorite season is fall, but the later months are a close second. You love seeing the way everyone’s faces get red when snow flurries come down to kiss their nose and cheeks. Love the way pom poms bounce atop little hats as children play and have snowball fights. Winter is surprisingly one of the warmest, sweetest times of the year. Like the hot coco Jeongguk has been swapping your regular macchiato with lately.

There’s a greatly anticipated party tonight- a mashup of Taehyung’s birthday and New Year’s Eve. Anticipated for the simple fact that said birthday boy has steadily been ignoring you for weeks, and tonight was a night where he couldn’t evade your attempts of reconciliation. He hasn’t returned a single call or even sent a text back. You can’t even be mad at him really, you know it’s justified. You know you fucked up. The coffee date you had with Yoongi last week let you know what you did.

Over an iced coffee, you learned that you had unintentionally skipped out on your best friend's Winter Showcase. The important one that he mentioned multiple times. The one you promised to attend no matter what.

It wasn’t on purpose; you wanted to go, to support him. But you just got caught up. In life, in school, in Jeongguk. It happens.

When Yoongi asked you why you had missed it, when he told you how hurt Taehyung was by your absence, your heart dropped, sank deep within your chest as your mouth fell open before closing, a small pursed frown on your lips. You didn’t have a good excuse. You went to get tattoos with Jeongguk and then to a party where you fucked him, and then home after that? You were too tired to make it? You just simply forgot? Those excuses weren’t good enough for you and you knew they wouldn’t be good enough for Taehyung.

Whereas Yoongi was okay with distance, long periods in between hanging out and talking, Taehyung wasn’t. He was the kind of friend that needed support, reassurance that you cared. He liked quality time and hangs outs that were planned ahead so he could look forward to them. He was looking forward to you being at his showcase.

The party is packed, even more so than usual. Students, drop-outs, alumni, and randoms alike, all congregate to bring in the new year, to celebrate the end of finals, and a certain art majors birthday. Bodies are on bodies, music is loud and deafening. Cups, bottles, and small baggies litter the floor and the smell of weed is nauseating.

Jeongguk’s hand in yours is sweet, though. Enough to ebb the distaste in your mouth as you watch the stereotypical disaster that is a college party.

“I’m going to go find the drinks, okay?” you lie, squeezing Jeongguk’s hand lightly.

He squeezes back, kisses the side of your head as he says, “Bring me one back too?”

You nod, and slip out of his view. Scanning the crowd until you see a familiar face.

Jimin is laughing, red cup in his hand, eyes curled and happy. He’s sitting on the arm of a couch, legs swinging as he laughs with a group of people. He takes a drink from his cup and let’s his eyes roam the room like he’s looking for someone.

The way his face changes when he sees you approaching is like a punch in the gut. It goes from happy, and carefree to stony- only a small, irritated, close-lipped smile on his face. Eyes harsh and cold, no longer holding the mirth they were just seconds ago. He says nothing when you step in front of him, he just looks you over like he’s bored and waiting for you to get on with it so he can be done with it.

You shift on your feet under his scrutiny. “Where’s Tae?” you ask.

Jimin narrows his eyes at you and tilts his head. “Now you want to know where he is? Haven’t been concerned with his whereabouts for months. Definitely weren’t worried about it last week.”

You wince but carry on swiftly. “Listen, I know I fucked up. I’m here to apologize.” You look at him expectantly, but he holds his ground. When he doesn’t falter, you resort to begging, “Please, Jimin. He’s my best friend… I miss him.”

You must look pitiful, because Jimin’s indifferent facade fades, and he clicks his tongue like he’s annoyed at himself for giving into you. “He’s getting us drinks in the kitchen.”

A smile takes over your face as you rush out a ‘thank you’, quickly turning on your heel to head in the opposite direction, before Jimin calls after you.

“Yeah?” you ask, looking over your shoulder at him.

“If he’s your best friend, maybe treat him like it, yeah?”

You continue to the kitchen without replying, and you can’t help the little simmer of annoyance that bubbles in your chest. Taehyung has been your best friend for years. And even though Jimin had a point, who was he to tell you anything about yours and Taehyung’s friendship?

Before the thought can fester, however, you see the boy you came looking for, two bottles of vodka in his hand like he’s trying to decide which to use. You see the little party hat atop his shaggy hair before anything else and your heart aches a little. You really did miss him. He lets out a small annoyed sound, and knowing him, he’s probably trying to figure out which has the highest alcohol percentage. You come up next to him, and say his name gently. He jumps, but when he realizes it’s you, the ghost of a smile curls on his lips like he’s happy to see you.

Until it’s replaced with resentment just as quickly. His sharp eyes squint at you before turning back to the bottles in his hands, scowl still in place.

“So you decided you could pencil me in between getting your heart toyed with and your back blown out?” He gives you a side glance and sees how your jaw drops in surprise. He carries on, unbothered. “Or did this just work out because it coincides with New Year’s and because he was invited? Only because he’s Jimin’s friend might I add.”

“Tae-” you try, doing your best to keep the hurt whine out of your tone.

“Save it, __. I don’t want to hear the excuses you have. Just-” he looks at you again, and you think that maybe he softens when he sees your crestfallen features. He sighs like he’s tired. “Just leave me alone. Just for a bit, okay? I’ll get over it eventually,” he finishes, finally deciding on the vodka he wants.

You know his request isn't unreasonable. But it’s already been so long that the distance in your friendship has been eating away at it, that you’re scared ‘eventually’ might take too long and by the time he comes around, there won’t be much of a friendship left. That the damage done, will be irreparable.

“Tae… It’s already been months, can’t we-”

Like night and day, the softness that you were able to pull out of him is immediately replaced with that resentment and anger you were met with when you first stepped into the kitchen.

“Yeah,” he seethes, strong brows furrowed. “And whose fault is that?”

His words are sharp and the sting from them makes you take a step back. That is, until you feel anger of your own creep up your throat like venom. “You’re one to talk, Taehyung. You could have reached out to me, too. You’re no better than me when you’re in a relationship.”

He groans, gives an exasperated laugh before shrugging. “You know what? Maybe I am just as bad as you, but at least I’m actually in a relationship,” he spits, “You’re just fucking someone that doesn’t give a fuck about you.”

You know he’s hurt because of the distance. That he doesn’t intend to be so mean. But that doesn’t make it hurt any less, and it doesn’t stop the angry tears from pooling in your eyes.

And although you’re angry, almost shaking with rage at the feeling of being cornered and blamed, your heart aches at hearing his words.

Jimin, who started seeing Taehyung after you started seeing Jeongguk, had already made your friend official. Had given him the title, the commitment, the relationship that you had been patiently and understandingly waiting for with Jeongguk. The bitterness that bleeds into your heart makes you feel gross and ugly.

You know what they say; that labels are superficial and don’t mean that much. But when you don’t have them? It makes you wonder. If a label really isn’t that important, like everyone says, why is Jeongguk so reluctant to give one to you?

“Jimin’s your boyfriend?” you whisper.

Taehyung gives you a short nod. “Month and half ago. You would’ve known if you got your head out of Jeongguk’s ass.”

Almost like he was summoned, the topic of debate waltz into the room, coming up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. He nuzzles into your neck.

It’s instinctual now, the way your body responds to him. The way you melt into his chest like second-nature, how your hands settle over his like they are keeping them in place. How immediately in his presence you feel calmer; the panicky, hurt feeling you were experiencing moments ago vanishing as if it were just a fleeting thought and not something that’s always in the back of your head.

Not in a possessive, ‘I need him to be mine’ kind of way, though.

More like, ‘Why won’t he be mine?’

“Hi,” he murmurs into your neck.

“Hi, baby,” you respond softly, out of habit. The room shirks around you whenever he’s near. Makes you feel like you’re in your own bubble with him.

Jeongguk’s about to reply, ask where the drinks are, but then he hears an annoyed scoff sound in front of you both. Jeongguk bristles as he looks up and sees Taehyung taking a big swig from his cup.

“Uh- am I interrupting? Should I go?” he asks hesitantly, looking between you and your friend.

“No-” you say at the same time that Taehyung says, “Yes.”

You cringe, and turn in Jeongguk’s arms, hands resting on his chest. “Just give me a couple more minutes okay? I’ll bring the drinks.”

Jeongguk searches your eyes, before looking at Taehyung one last time before giving you a stern nod and a quick kiss.

You turn back to Taehyung, ready to apologize for Jeongguk’s interruption, when he talks over you.

“You’re pathetic,” he starts, and you roll your eyes with an irritated sigh before he continues, “but I know you love him. And that you can’t help it,” he shrugs. “But as your friend, I have to tell you that it’s not going to end well. You probably don’t even need me to tell you that. You probably already know and are choosing to ignore it for the sake of the delusions you’ve made up in your ‘pretty little head’.”

You pout at him quoting you, and your brows furrow. “He cares about me. And he’s Jimin’s best friend. He’s a good person, you don’t even know him,” you argue defensively. Though you know your arguments make little sense and are flimsy at best.

Taehyung frowns. Pauses like he’s thinking.

“I didn’t say he was a bad person, and maybe he does care about you in his own messed up way. But he doesn’t care about you in the way that you want him to.” His lips are still down turned when he speaks again.

“And the difference between him with you and him with Jimin is astronomical; it shouldn’t even be a comparison, but I will humor you,” he rubs a hand up and down his face like he’s tired. “The dynamic is completely different, for obvious reasons. For one, Jimin is a safe relationship. You are not. Jimin isn’t in love with him, Jimin isn’t sucking his dick, and Jimin doesn’t want things from Jeongguk that Jeongguk cannot give, or does not want to give,” he says with a raised brow as he takes a sip of his drink.

It seems that the anger has died down some between you both, a semi-civil conversation finally being had. You wrinkle your brows in confusion at him. “What are you talking about?”

He rolls his eyes. “Cmon __. Why do you think he hasn’t made you his girlfriend? Why do you think he literally has not been in a serious relationship since high school? Why do you think he never agrees to anything more than 2 months out?” He waits for you to answer but you just purse your lips stubbornly. “He’s scared. Dare I say terrified of commitment, and that’s exactly what you want from him right?”

You stay headstrong and quiet for a moment longer, ignoring his question in favor of asking one of your own when you finally do speak up. “If I’m so scary, why hasn’t he left?”

Taehyung shrugs. “Fuck if I know? Maybe he does care about you like you say he does. I don’t think so, but hey,” He raises his hands in mock surrender, like he is throwing in the figurative towel. “Maybe you’re right and maybe I‘m wrong. Or maybe there’s some fucked up codependency fermenting between you both when you copulate. I genuinely have no clue, and frankly, I don’t care to find out. Don’t text me until you come to your senses. And don’t get mad when I tell you ‘I told you so’.”

And with that, he turns and leaves you to make your own drinks. You hope the smile you give Jeongguk when you find him is believable.

That night when you go back to his place, you voice your concerns to him in between sweet, heated kisses that taste like hot cider. You tell him hesitantly how Taehyung voiced his concerns about Jeongguk not caring about you and Jeongguk got a little irritated, a little miffed as he unlatched his lips from your neck. He asked what Taehyung knew, how he even came to that conclusion when he’s not around you both.

He assured you with gentle touches and tender words that of course he cares about you. He reminded you that he always makes time for you, he always answers your calls and your texts, he takes you out every now and then, too. He asks you what you think and when you contemplate your answer, going over what he said, you can’t really argue with him. Even if an uneasy, dismal feeling settles in the pit of your tummy.

~~~

hellooo!! again, this is just a scene and part of the plot that i chose not to use because i felt like the fic was already so long. i wish that i had ended up including it tho, so i hope you enjoyed even though its nothing special <3 feel free to do the things if you liked it: like, comment, reblog, send an ask~~ love u, ty again for helping me reach that milestone <3

[slasherhaven]

Can I make a request with the slashers(whoever you would like)who has a s/o who doesn’t know what they do so when they catch them in the act, the s/o reaction to it is scared and they want to or try to leave the slashers. (If that makes since)

The Slashers’ S/O finding out about what they do:

Thomas Hewitt

You had known Thomas for a while now. When he worked at the meat processing plant. He was quiet, kept to himself, but he was sweet. The sweetest man you had met in that place.

The two of you became close, you started dating.

Then the factory closed, most people moved out of town. You were trying to stay but it was getting difficult. 

But the Hewitts stayed and you visited Thomas everyday. Luda May loved you and you loved her, thinking of her as a mother figure.

You loved Thomas and he loved you, more than anything.

You visited everyday, and today it seemed that nobody was home. But the door was open so you just let yourself in, knowing nobody would mind.

You called for Thomas but got no response. But you heard a sound in the basement.

Maybe he was doing some repairs or something down there? You just shrugged and headed down the stairs.

You froze at the bottom of the stairs.

There Thomas was, the man you loved, hacking up a body, reminding you of his time at the factory...but much more disturbing.

The stair creaked as you shifted, catching Thomas’ attention.

He turned, expecting Hoyt or Luda May but he saw you and froze.

“Tommy...”

You looked between him and the body of a young man before coming to your senses, darting back up the stairs and out of the house.

Thomas followed behind you. He wanted to explain...to beg for forgiveness...or do something.

He stopped at the front door, watching you cry as you climbed into your car and drove off.

Hoyt would have told him to go after you, you were a witness, he had to stop you. But Thomas stayed in the door way, tears staining his cheeks as he watched you leave. He let you go.

You were the best thing that ever happened to him, the only person to show him kindness and love. You made him feel like he might actually deserve love, somebody as good as you, but he didn’t. Of course he didn’t.

And he didn’t blame you for running.

He’s glad you did. He’d miss you more than anything, he would always love you, but a part of him is glad that you ran.

You deserved better than this, better than him.

You didn’t deserve to be dragged into this. 

He wasn’t mad at you, just distraught that he didn’t get one more chance to tell you that he loved you, to hear you say that you loved him, before you left.

You decided that this would be a very good time to finally get out of time. For good.

You just didn’t know how Thomas was capable of this. He was always so sweet, kind, and considerate. Despite his size, he was incredibly gentle whenever he touched you, with everything he did. 

You would never have guessed that he could hurt somebody, kill somebody and then...chop them up?

You wiped your tears as you drove home. Planning on grabbing your stuff before heading out just like the rest of the town had. They had it right this whole time...

Bo Sinclair

Keeping someone oblivious to the sinister truth of the town was difficult but Bo would be damned if he didn’t try his hardest to keep you away from it. You were the only person who could calm him down, the only person who had such a soothing effect on him and accepted him for who he was. He didn’t want you to find out.

But it was only matter of time and it happened in the worst way possible, you saw him kill somebody.

He hadn’t even noticed you until he stood up and turned to you, seeing you frozen to the spot, eyes wide in fear.

“Sweetheart, listen to me. We’re alright, you don’t need to freak out” Bo held his hands out to his sides, like he was trying to show you that he wasn’t going to hurt you.

“Freak out?! Bo you just-you killed him!” you exclaimed, completely horrified.

“There’s so much you don’t know” he told you, making you even more confused. Had he does this before? What else had he been hiding from you?

“Let’s just go back to the house, forget all about this” he suggested, walking up to you.

“...he was a nice kid...even apologised for cussing in front of me...he wouldn’t have hurt you and you-you killed him” you shook your head, taking steps backwards to keep your distance from the man you loved. 

“Come on” Bo muttered, grabbing your arm firmly but not hard enough to hurt, before pulling you back up to the house.

You fought against him, nervous to even be around him.

“What about him? What are you going to do with him?” you asked, glancing back at where the body lay but it was soon out of sight.

“Vincent will deal with it” Bo assured you.

“Vincent? What the hell is going on, Bo?!” you looked back to him with wide eyes. Vincent wouldn’t hurt anyone...right? 

Soon enough, you were back in the house. You wanted to give Bo the benefit of the doubt, maybe the man attacked him? You doubted it but it could have happened...

But those hopes where smashed when Bo told you the truth about everything, seemingly mad at himself.

“You mean...the figures...oh god” the horror on your face make Bo’s stomach tighten in the most unpleasant way. 

You were mortified by the truth, scared of what happened here, scared of him.

“I...I’ve got to go” you mumbled, like you were in a daze, but all you knew was that you needed to get out of the town.

“Oh yeah? Where are you going to go?” Bo snapped slightly, his anger at you wanting to leave him getting the better of him for a moment.

“I’ll figure it out” you didn’t know, you didn’t care. You just had to get away from all of this.

“Y/n, you’re smarter than this. Now that you know about all this...we can’t let you leave” he told you. That was exactly what you were worried about.

“Bo...please...” you pleaded, tears streaming down your cheeks.

“I’m not going to hurt you” Bo promised but how could you take his word for anything any more.

“Then let me go” you begged.

“I can’t” he shook his head.

You made a rush for the door but Bo quickly caught you, his heart aching when you screamed out.

But he tried to shush you, tried to sooth you. Holding you against his chest tightly.

Eventually your body stopped fighting and you went limp in his hold, crying into his chest as he held you, one hand stroking your hair.

Everything had changed, nothing would be the same again. You were the one person who hadn’t treated him like some sort of monster or nuisance. You loved him, cared for him, and now you might never do that again. 

But he couldn’t risk you leaving and telling people about the town, he just couldn’t.

Vincent Sinclair 

How he had managed to hide the dark truth about the town from you, Vincent had no idea.

He felt awful for lying to you but you came here during a hard time in your life, found a home here...you had treated him with so much love and kindness.

He loved you so much and you loved him dearly. So, he wanted to keep that a secret from you, to protect you from the awful things he and his brothers did.

But you found out...in the worst way he could imagine. He hadn’t locked the door to his workroom, and you wanted skipped right down the stairs.

You expected to find the man you loved working on his next piece of art, not covering a living human being with wax. By the time you got there, it was too late to stop the process.

“Vincent?” you spoke before you could think. 

Despite being horrified, you couldn’t bring yourself to be completely scared of him. You thought you had known him so well, that he was the gentlest man you had ever met. He was so sweet, gentle, considerate, loving, timid...how could he hurt somebody like this?

Vincent quickly turned to you, completely mortified that you had seen any of this.

You couldn’t stand the sight, it was disgusting and not something you would quickly forget, so you quickly made your way back up the stairs.

Vincent hurried behind you. He wouldn’t grab you and he’d try not to scare you anymore but he couldn’t just let you run off. He hoped that there was some way you could forgive him for all of this...but he knew it was unlikely.

You had just left the house as Bo climbed out of his truck. It only took one look at your scared, teary expression to know what was going on.

It was Bo that physically caught you, asking what was wrong. But you tried to get out of his hold, knowing that whatever was going on here had to involve all of the brothers. 

When Vincent hurried out of the house, seeing you and Bo, he headed over. He placed a hand on your shoulder, batting Bo away from you.

“You better handle this, Vincent. They can’t leave” Bo’s tone darkened slightly before he walked away, heading inside.

You quickly turned back to Vincent, eyes wide and teary.

You felt sick. Seeing that...knowing what Vincent did...what they all do...remembering all the times you had praised Vincent on the figures and how realistic they looks, oh god, you might throw up.

Vincent could see that and instinctively tried to comfort you, his heart stinging when you flinched away.

“...Bo’s not going to let me leave, is he?” you asked, voice cracking slightly, already knowing the answer.

A part of you still believed that Vincent would let you leave, he had never been anything but wonderful to you, you had to believe that at least some of that was real. But Bo had always been more wary of you, more intense, and you knew he was in charge here.

Vincent just shook his head, hating the way that the answer made you cry.

He knew you were scared and you had every right to be, but it still hurt that the thought of staying here with him made you sob like that.

“Please, Vinny” you pleaded.

What were you meant to do? Run? Bo would catch you and there was nowhere to do. There was no way you could make it to the nearest town without Bo finding you and bring you right back.

The look that Vincent gave you was sincerely apologetic and his touch was still gentle as he walked you back into the house, patient with your reluctant steps.

Nothing was going to be the same. Vincent knew what. You might have to stay here but now it will be against your will.

You will still be here but he had already lost you. Vincent knew that.

Lester Sinclair

You had thought Ambrose was a blessing. The three brothers taking you in during your time of need. You moved in properly with Lester a little later when you started dating.

But this town was far from a blessing, you realised that when you discovered the truth about the town, learning about how the brothers got their victims and what they did to them.

As soon as you saw all of this, you hurried back to the home you shared with Lester.

Oh Lester...sweet, energetic, kind Lester...how could he be apart of this?

You packed up a bag of things you’d need but before you made it out the door, Lester arrived him.

His heart broke when he saw you with your bag. You knew...you knew everything and you wanted to leave, you wanted to leave him...

“Y/n, I...I’m sorry” was he apologising for being involved in those people’s deaths, he guessed so. He knew it wouldn’t help but he hoped you could see his sincerity.

“How could you be a part of this, Lester?” you asked, tears staining your cheeks. You just couldn’t picture the man you loved ever purposely hurting an innocent person.

“I...I’m sorry” he wanted to give you an explanation just like you deserved but he didn’t have one, not one that would make things better. So he just apologised again, because he was so sorry that you had to see any of this. “...you’re leaving?” he asked, already knowing the answer and it killed him.

“Will you let me?” you asked, a little nervous about his response. You were terrified of what was happening in Ambrose, you didn’t want to be terrified of him as well.

Lester just nodded, giving you some sense of relief. You were free to leave.

You hung your head, unable to look at the man you loved, as you walked past him.

“Please, Y/n” Lester’s cracking voice made you stop, ready to hear whatever it was that he had to say. “...please just forget about Ambrose...” he pleaded with you. This time you just nodded before walking out the door.

You hoped you would be able to forget about this place but you doubted it.

Lester knew that he had to let you go. He shouldn’t have let you stayed in the first place, he shouldn’t have dragged you into this, he had to let you go because he loved you and thought you deserved better.

But he knew that Bo was going to go crazy about this but Bo wasn’t here right now, he wouldn’t have to find out until sometime tomorrow. By then you would be long gone.

Asa Emory (The Collector)

It was pretty late and Asa was staying late at work again (at least, that was what he told you). You were just about to turn in for the night when there was a knock on the door.

It wasn’t like Asa to forget his keys...and he took the car, so it couldn’t have been him.

You answered the door but nobody was there, just a folder on the doorstep. Asa would have chastised you for picking up a mysterious package and taking into the house but you were curious.

You sat down in the lounge and took a closer look, the notice taped to the front making you pause.

“Do you know where he goes at night?”

Was whoever left this for you talking about Asa? They had to be...

Your mind instantly went to that he was cheating on you. Now, you really didn’t think he would be cheating on you, that he would do that to you, but what else could that note mean?

You opened the folder and pulled out a stack of photos. You gasped at the images, nearly dropping them at first. 

Various images of mutilated bodies, horrific...creations? God, why would anyone send you this and what did it have to do with Asa?

Coming to the last few photos there was a man with the victims, wearing some sort of dark mask.

It wasn’t until the last two photos that you knew without a doubt what all of this was about. The last photos showed the man removing his mask, revealing the face of the man you loved.

He made these...things? With body parts of people he...murdered? How could he do something so awful?

You threw the photos down onto the coffee table, wiping your tears and trying to not throw up your dinner. Asa hurt these people, killed them and made monstrous creations...and you had absolutely no idea...

You had to get out of here before he came home...

You jumped to your feet and headed for the bedroom. You needed to pack some belongings and leave, you were worried about what he would do when he found out that you knew. Even if you still couldn’t fully believe it.

The sound of a car pulling up outside made you pause.

Asa was home. 

You heard the front door open and close. The lights were on, he knew you were still awake, so he called for you.

You panicked, tears still rolling down your cheeks as you locked the bedroom door.

Asa’s brow furrowed when he got no response from you but he paused when he walked into the lounge, seeing the photos scattered over the table. Who had sent these to you? He was going to kill them...

He called your name again but it only made you cry harder.

He walked up the stairs and towards the bedroom door, attempting to open it but finding it locked.

“Y/n. Open the door” he ordered, surprisingly gentle. “I know what you saw, let me explain everything to you.”

You had nowhere to go, you were locked in the bedroom. The only way out was through that door and Asa was on the other side.

“Did-did you do it?” you asked. You just needed him to give you an answer that proved those images wrong, to give you an explanation. You needed him to convince you that he hadn’t done those things.

Both of you were standing on either side of the door now, talking through the wood. 

“You saw those photos. You know it was me. I’m not going to insult you by lying to you, you wouldn’t really believe me anyway” he sounded so calm. Too calm. It wasn’t the voice of somebody who’s partner just found out they were a serial killer.

“...why?” you had no idea why you asked that question. It didn’t matter, in the end. But a part of you needed to know why the man you loved would do something so vile.

“I don’t think I have a satisfying answer to that question” was his answer. He was right, that wasn’t what you wanted to hear at all. Though, you didn’t really know what you wanted to hear.

“...what now?” you felt safe behind this door. Even if you knew that you couldn’t stay behind it forever.

“I can’t let you go. Not knowing what you know, you know that” his calmness was more unsettling than the images...how could he be so calm about this?!

“I-I won’t tell anyone” you promised.

“Y/n, you know I can’t risk that” he was right and even you knew that.

“...please” you pleaded.

“I’m not going to hurt you, you just have to stay. I promise you’ll be okay, with me” Asa sounded convincing and you wanted to believe him but how could you when you found out that he had been hiding so much from you?

“Asa...”

“Open the door” he ordered again.

You didn’t. You fell asleep eventually, waking up to the door still locked. You thought that maybe Asa had given up but you knew that wasn’t like him. You whispered his name through the door and he was quick to respond. You weren’t getting out of this room without running straight into Asa.

That’s when you realised that you weren’t leaving. Asa couldn’t let you go.

Jesse Cromeans (Chromeskull)

Jesse has plenty of enemies, not that you know that, and it was one of those enemies that decided that the best way to get to him was through you.

You were home alone, Jesse away on a business trip, when somebody rang the doorbell.

When you answered the door, nobody was there. Just a box set on the doorstep. 

You were careful, you looked around, gently opened the box but only saw videotapes. Weird. 

You took the box inside and took a closer look. There were plenty of videotapes, the box full. Each one was labelled by a state, a town, a month. You didn’t know what any of that meant.

So, like an idiot, you played a tape.

You were horrified. The video was of a young woman being murdered gruesomely. 

Why would anyone send you a box of snuff films? Who could be so disturbed. 

And something in your gut told you that these were real.

You were just about to turn it off, sick to your stomach, about to call the police. About to message Jesse about this awful thing.

But then a man walked into frame. Bald, tall, fitted black suit, and wearing a chrome skull mask. Something so...unsettlingly familiar. 

It couldn’t be...it just couldn’t be your Jesse... 

But it was and you knew it. You turned off the video, ejecting the tape and throwing it to the ground, tears streaming down your face.

All these tapes...proof of the horrific, sadistic murders that the man you loved had committed.

The front door opening and closing made you jump...

You turned and came face to face with the man.

He was about to sign a greeting as he approached you but stopped when he saw your terrified, tear stained face.

He took in your expression for glancing down at the box of tapes, noticing the one you had thrown down and broken...how did you get those tapes? Of course, he knew what they were instantly.

He was going to find out who gave you these and he was going to make sure they regretted it.

“Jesse...please tell me these aren’t real...that, that isn’t you” you pleaded with him, even if you knew the truth now. He didn’t respond, just stared at the box of tapes. “They’re-they’re all yours?...all you?” you asked.

You let out a broken sob when he nodded. There was no point lying now, you knew, it was over.

How could the man you loved do these things? He had always be so wonderful, so perfect, if you didn’t have all this evidence, you wouldn’t have believed it.

“...are you going to hurt me?” you asked and he shook his head. 

God, you wanted so badly to believe him but after seeing what he was capable of...you just didn’t know anymore.

“How could you do those things, Jesse?” this was the man you wanted to marry...but you didn’t know him at all.

He took a step towards you but you took one back. You were scared of him...and that was the last thing he ever wanted.

‘I’m not going to hurt you’ he signed. ‘...I’m sorry...’ he apologised because that’s all he could do. There was no explanation he could give you, no gift or gesture that would earn your forgiveness, there was nothing he could do to make this right. All he could do was give you a weak apologise. 

“...you’re...I don’t know you, you’re not my Jesse...I...” he stepped towards you again but you took five steps back this time.

The images on those tapes flashed through your mind. Those women, the way he killed them...how could he ever do something like that and come home to you. To touch you, to love you. You were disgusted with him and yourself.

It must have been the adrenaline in your body but you finally took action, not bothering to grab your coat as you hurried past him and towards the front door.

You gasped when he caught your arm, looking up at him with fearful eyes. His grip was firm but he was true to his word, he wasn’t hurting you.

“I’m leaving, Jesse” you told him as firmly as you could, voice faltering.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. Still holding you as he typed something.

He turned the screen to you so that you could read it. 

‘NO POLICE’

What where you supposed to do. Whatever it took to get out of here.

So, you nodded.

He turned the phone back to himself, typing something new and showing it to you again.

‘I LOVE YOU’

You let out another sob and he released your arm.

You left the house, no knowing where exactly you were going. A friends house? The police station? You didn’t know.

All you did know was that more gifts kept arriving expect these were clothes, jewellery, just stacks of cash. Was Jesse apologising, trying to win you back, pay you off, buy your silence, or just making sure you’re alright? You didn’t know.

Obviously, you left Jesse but that didn’t mean that he had to like it. He still watched over you, made sure you had the money you needed to live a good life.

Jesse sincerely hoped you would keep your promise of not going to the police. If you didn’t, he could just let you go, keep you on your feet. But if you went to the police...he would have to deal with it one way or another.

Otis Driftwood

Otis had met you in a bar, it was that simple. The two of you hit it off like he had never done with somebody before. He never hid any part of himself (other than the crimes he’s committed) and you still seemed interested in him.

You knew that he and his family were...beyond odd, but you didn’t know that they hurt people. So you continued to give him the benefit of the doubt.

You dated. You loved him and he loved you.

You had gone to the Firefly residence and let yourself in like you usually did. You normally planned a time to meet with Otis but you decided that you just needed to see him now.

You called out to him but no response came, nobody was here but the door was unlocked...

You were just going to wait or come back later but then you heard something bang in the basement.

You had never been down there before, you never had a reason or desire too but if somebody was down there, maybe they could tell you when Otis would be back. Or maybe it was Otis!

So you headed down the stairs and into the basement.

“Oh my God...” you completely froze when you stepped into the room.

People, held in cages, were cowering together, bloody and beaten. They begged for mercy, for your help. But what you were staring at was Otis, covered in blood. He had turned to you, surprise on his face and knife in his hand.

Otis knew it was only a matter of time, the family didn’t hide their true nature very well. He just didn’t think it would be now, he wanted longer with you. Because he knew that as soon as you found out, you’d be gone.

You ran. You had that much sense.

You ran up the stairs, through the house, and out the front door, with Otis right behind you.

You always knew he was strange, had an interested in morbid things, but you never would have guessed sadistic killer. Who would just assume that?!

You never worried that he would hurt you, but now you did.

Once you got a few feet from the house, you had to come to a stop. Even if your whole body was telling you to keep running but you curled over and threw up.

Those poor people...all the gore in that basement...on Otis...what had he done and how many people had he done it too?

“Y/n-” Otis’ voice coming from behind you made you snap back up, turning to him but stepping backwards.

“Get away from me” you were terrified and disgusted, he could see it on your face.

“I would never hurt you. You know that” Otis assured you, while he stood there splattered in somebody else’s blood. It would have been comical to somebody with a fucked up sense of humour.

“...I don’t...” you shook your head, your answer quiet.

“’course you do. Have I ever hurt you before?” he asked but that didn’t matter anymore.

“You hurt those people!” you remined him. 

Maybe if you knew the details of his other crimes, you wouldn’t have been able to snap at him so easily. You definitely would throw up again, that’s for sure.

“Hey, what’s going on here?” Baby’s cheerful voice caught the attention of both of you. “Oh shit...they found out, didn’t they?” she asked, still smiling like nothing was wrong.

“Go inside, Baby” Otis ordered sternly.

“Aw don’t worry, hun. Otis ain’t gonna hurt ya, he loves ya!” Baby assured you.

“I’ve got to go...” you mumbled, turning and making your escape again.

“Are they going to talk, Otis?” Baby asked her brother, both of them knowing they can’t let you go to the police or anything.

“I have it handled” Otis huffed before following after you, making Baby scoff. 

Well...you weren’t dead, but your relationship with the family was far from over. Otis couldn’t just let you go around running your mouth about them but he didn’t want to hurt you either. 

Hopefully, the two of you can figure something out once you’ve calmed down...