#I posted on so many platforms already i felt like i was spamming lol

[laarems]

I didn’t post these on tumblr yet but i participated in inktober this year and drew wwx every day in october! it was so fun!!

[the-bjd-community-confess]

Many Divaz/Z3st confos

Mod: Not all the ones in the inbox, but a batch of them to peruse at your leisure.

1. Z3st got told by a mod on the BJD Discord to stop with his drama-mongering. He argued with the mod. In b4 he whines here about the BJD Discord.

~Anonymous

2. @A certain someone: DOA mods warning you to stop making drama or else ban is not an attack on you. BJD Discord mod warning you to stop making drama or ban is not an attack on you. They're just doing their jobs. To stop finding yourself in situations where you feel attacked, don't make drama. Seriously it's getting super tiresome seeing your crap all over the place esp since you're acting like someone shot your dog or smth. You're doing this to yourself and blaming others for your own actions.

~Anonymous

3. My friend got messaged on FB by Z3st because they posted in support of Divaz. Z3st called them names and tried to prove his "innocence". Apparently my friend wasn't the only person Z3st did this to, I wouldn't be surprised if he did it to everyone who commented in support of Divaz. Z3st is crying about being the victim but all I see is him being the aggressor. Who the fuck messages people they don't know to harass them like that?

~Anonymous 

4.@al3xcessive... you can't blame someone for "doxxing" you when you put your information out there first. Also, that's not what "doxxing" is, they've literally only showed your name AFTER YOU SHOWED IT YOURSELF PUBLICLY. All of your other information was hidden. I searched for your name on FB and wouldn't have ever found you if you hadn't gone and shown yourself by spamming comments on the post.

~Anonymous

5.lol al3xcess claiming he'd been "harassed" when he DMs random people to call them bootlickers and they tell him to fuck off xD

~Anonymous

6.If the customer is batshit terrible to work with, you refund them and ban them. Don’t feed trolls and all. Seems simple? But Div4s just gonna dox somebody like that?  Even their most hardcore fans ought to be sayin “hol up” instead of cheering.

~Anonymous

7.Lol @ Z3st calling Divaz "insidiously hostile" when he himself is this way and he even admitted it: "i had been nothing but nice, and ABSURDLY patient, and understanding and looking back now the gushing tone in which i took makes me sick" - Looking at HIS OWN receipts, his "absurdly nice" is just normal decency. It really says a lot about him that he considers it absurd and that it makes him sick. Divas aren't the ones being insidious, Z3st, you admitted you were deceptive from the getgo.

~Anonymous

8.I'm done with r_s who defend BJDivaz on DoA. I had to wait MONTHS for any sign of life from them, they NEVER answer their emails, and they've mishandled ALL of my orders. They won't be an adult about this! If you're ordering from them, you're pretty much supporting them. Stop.

~Anonymous

9.Neutral to Divaz but seeing them did a call out to a troublesome customer is a bit uncomfortable. I believe they should have kept the person's name as anon, never mention their irl or username. I understand that they are upset that their business reputation is damaged by the customer's words but still a business shouldn't blast their customer's personal info on public platform. A business should be a business. Personal feelings should be handled off the business page.

Again I fully understand Divaz is human too and they can feel upset by exaggerated rumours but a business shouldn't be so sensitive to any provocation. I'm sure other dealers also get a lot of negative comments but we seldom hear them talk about it publicly. Really not my place to say, I think Divaz should try to keep personal emotions off their business page. Occasional bad press will naturally go away on its own if they can maintain good and satisfied customers on a long run. I feel like them fighting back against angry (ex) customers and seeking comfort from others is not the best move as a business. It is fine that they express their frustration to their family and friends but definitely not on a public business page. It just feels unprofessional. It's my 2 cents.

Sorry Divaz, I know you don't want to hear this but please do try to keep personal feelings aside when running a business. It will really help you on a long run. Haters will only use this against you because they know you will react to their provocation. This will never end and only damge your reputation further. Hope for the best.

~Anonymous

10. Cheeesus, that long Divaz post on that DoA user is too much. With all the precise time-stamps details and quotations, it's like a lawyer presenting a courtcase like "the evidence here shows that at 'hour;minute' you said this XXX. Is it true?" And we, the witnesses/audience, are all called to participate in the judgment. lol

~Anonymous 

11. ne1 else get msged by Z3st on fb cuz he wants to bitch u out for posting on divaz? 

~Anonymous

12. Divaz doxxes and stalks people, talks shit about customers on their FB, forgets to place orders, hands out tons of excuses for why they can't reply... among other things. Why the fuck are you all still dealing with them? Cl0ver singing, Alice's and a bunch of other companies are ten times better. Stop👏 validating👏 shitty 👏companies 👏

~Anonymous

13.There are certain people who always jump to the defense of BjDivaz and get mad when other people have legitimate issues with them. Get a life. Some of us have real problems and bad experiences ordering from them.

~Anonymous

14. I know everyone has a different situation and state their opinion with what they have already experienced, but I'm not gonna lie that I felt bad when I read someone saying that bjdivaz long layaways aren't even neccesary and they should just remove it. While I do agree bjdivaz could improve in how they manage some stuff, at the same time they are the only ones that let me "join" the hobby and don't feel bad because I can't pay in full or put down big payments as other hobbyists. I know it's not neccesary and I can save, but from someone who comes from a place of poverty I already feel guilty enough spending in a hobby and having big amounts of money always end up in paying emergencies and starting from 0 again. So these "really long and unnecessary layaways" give me the opportunity to not feel as guilty and enjoy something like the rest without spending too much every month to the point that it could affect my daily life.

~Anonymous

15. Z3st/Alex is legitimately evil for what he's doing, trying to put a company out of business that, per the emails that he himself posted, has never been anything but helpful to him (and many others). I'd bet he's the main source of all the BJDivaz hate going on here, and the miserable people around here were more than happy to grab their pitchforks and join his mob. Stop it.

~Anonymous

[yukipri]

So I’m back from the dead (literally). A Goodbye Message.

Hey there. Some of you may remember me.

Some of you may have wondered why I suddenly stopped posting, but the vast majority of you probably didn’t even notice, as is how it is. ^ ^;

I’m finally back, and it wasn’t an easy journey getting back.

Here’s what happened.

(Slightly long post, but please forgive me for not putting it under a cut, it’s sorta important)

On November 19th, I checked my blog as I always do, to learn that my blog was terminated.

No warning, no reason, suddenly BOOM gone. I’ve had this blog since spring 2012. It’s almost entirely sfw, I’ve always been hyper careful with tagging, and any questionable content has always been hosted on other platforms. Yet for some reason, I was one of many blogs caught up in what’s come to be known as the #TumblrPurge.

I followed all the steps. I emailed staff, first desperately, then more rationally, making my case. I figured that a bot had caught my blog, as I knew plenty of other more suspicious content blogs that were unharmed. At first there was hope, it’s just a glitch, it’s happening to a lot of people, they’ll give it back right away, some people have already gotten theirs back!

Nothing.

My methods of contacting followers were limited to my Patreon and Twitter, neither of which has much of a base. Followers who knew me on there were incredibly kind and supportive, and sometimes even reached out to staff on my behalf.

I didn’t want to spam, but I also was desperate. I emailed staff once a week. I tried using different categories. I tried adding attachments. My messages ranged from simple and succinct, to deeply personal and desperate.

I was honestly devastated. I spiraled into the worst depression I’ve ever been in. I could barely eat and vomited nonstop for a week. I gained 20 pounds in 2 weeks. I was completely out of control mentally, and even reached out to a psychiatrist friend in case I couldn’t handle it myself. I couldn’t draw, and thinking about projects that I once loved only hurt me more.

Talk about social media addiction, but I’ve legit never gone longer than a week without posting something for years, and especially since becoming a content creator, it felt sickening to not have the place where I drove myself to post constantly and consistently. It broke my schedule. It made me feel cut off from the world, and I felt claustrophobic and uncomfortable in my own skin.

I lost so many things with this blog. Yes, I was primarily a content creator, and while of course I had backups of all my art and some of my longer text posts, I lost so much more.

I lost, perhaps most importantly, all my interactions with my followers. I lost connections to so many people, people I hadn’t contacted in years and may not have even been active anymore, but who I always believed I would have this route back to. I lost memories, both online and of my personal life that I had recorded on here.

And as someone who unfortunately put so much of my identity and self-validation on my social media experience, I suddenly felt like I was absolutely nothing.

For the longest time, I thought I was su*cidal as a result of my depression (word bleeped out bc who knows what can get you flagged now). I certainly thought about death and dying daily.

But then, I realized what I was feeling wasn’t quite that. I didn’t feel like I wanted to die.

I felt like I was already dead.

Which, may sound like an exaggeration, but in terms of tumblr at least, it’s exactly the same. If I had died in rl, I would have dropped off the map, just like this. Suddenly stopped posting, no warning in advance. My blog may have existed, but in this case, no record of my existence even remained. To people who came looking for my url, I may as well have been dead. You wouldn’t have known any better.

Or who knows, maybe I was a criminal or had done something awful that resulted in my blog being removed. Maybe I had just had it with this site and had chosen to leave. Maybe I was just taking a much needed break. It would have been odd, since I prioritized communicating and always said when I needed a break, which was rarely ever. But either way, I had no way of telling any of you what had happened to me. My voice was gone.

Feeling like I was dead, after I recognized what I was feeling, was...disturbing, I guess. Kinda explained why I always felt like a corpse though.

(of course, feeling like I was dead contributed to thinking other things like maybe it’d be better if I really wasn’t around at all, but that’s a result, and not the main feeling.)

Anyway, I kept emailing staff, and I finally managed to come back. It took ten emails and over 2 months of waiting and wasting away and trying to come to terms with how I’m unlikely to get it back. I didn’t get my blog back until TODAY.

Now that I have come back, the landscape’s changed, as I had heard it had. They hadn’t even announced the adu*t content policy change when they terminated me. I honestly feel like I’m back in a world that’s moved on without me, and it’s made me feel very strongly how insignificant I was in the first place.

During my time being dead, I had a lot of time to think about what I wanted to do. I regretted not doing my 25K follower giveaway sooner. I regretted not getting this or that content out. I regretted having kept certain long text posts and ask responses in my drafts yet unpublished.

But more than anything, I regretted not being able to say goodbye, and thank you all for my time here.

Yes, it’s had ups and downs, but tumblr was where I first found myself as an artist. Tumblr was what first made me interact with and find a group of people interested in what I created. Tumblr was where I was able to interact with those people, you. And I know I’ve had my ups and downs too, and different fandoms and different moods, but I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for letting me be a part of your experience here, however big or small that experience may have been.

I also learned the dangers of immersing myself too deeply on one online platform. So much of myself had been poured into this one blog, this one blog that can disappear with a legit snap of staff’s fingers. (my twitter handle was “Got Thanos’d on Tumblr” for a good month lol) I used to think that’s what made my content valuable, that I poured so much love and thought and everything personal into it, that’s what made it special, but in the end oh so very damaging when it was ripped away. As someone who spent almost all my time online creating content, it was an awful reality pill I had to swallow, and I don’t want ANYONE experiencing the same thing I did.

So please. The takeaway here, if I can be a cautionary tale, is to be aware that an online identity is more unstable than you think it is. It can go POOF. I’m lucky to be here, and that staff finally responded, and that I had the masochism to continue emailing staff weekly no matter how much I felt like I should stop breathing afterwards.

Also, please, if you have people on this site you care about, whether it be a friend or someone you think is neat, anyone you will miss if they suddenly disappeared, please go connect with them in other places beyond this site, which may become increasingly unstable. This can be another social media if they have it, an email, a chatting platform, anything. Even if you personally don’t use it yet, create an account so you can find them when you can no longer access your account, or they can’t access theirs and they can find you. Don’t regret it like I did.

As for me, after all of this, I don’t know if I can post content on here again.

I’d gone well beyond hoping for another chance at this community. All I’ve been thinking about these past two months was how I would have wanted to say goodbye.

Now that I have my account back, I’m currently filled with more numbness and bitterness than any joy or relief. I don’t know if I can create content anymore for a platform that has hurt me so deeply, no matter how much its community means to me. This experience changed me, and I’ve taken damage that isn’t going to go away so easily.

As I think about what to do moving forward, for now, you can find me on my accounts that I WAS active on these past two months. They aren’t the same, but they were all I had.

If you read this message until the end, thank you.

Again, I might decide to post on here again. I might not. But for now, here’s again what I’ve been wanting to say for two months:

Thank you, Tumblr. And goodbye.

-Kazu

(yukipri.tumblr.com)

https://twitter.com/YukiPri_Art

https://www.patreon.com/YukiPri

[ludacryst]

Survey Says..

1: How tall or short do you wish you were? I'm 5'3, but I sometimes wish I was shorter because of how cute it can be in a relationship. I've watched too much anime, okay?

2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not) Well, @warpedbelief didn't help me figuring this out because his dragon idea was really cool. However... I'll just stick with cats. I love cats. (I also love dragons..)

3: Do you have a favorite clothing style? Comfortable. Lol. I mostly wear PJs.

4: What was your favorite video game growing up? Final Fantasy series in general. 7 & 9 Specifically. My heart was always with Zelda ALTTP though.

5: What three things/people do you think of most each day: Erwin, Wiggles, PoF (Power of Friendship, so my friends/family.)

6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say? Caution : Speaks her mind far too often. No filter. Bossy af. Does not cave easily.

7: What is your opinion on [insert person/thing here]? I don't know.

8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic] Melancholic.

9: Are you ticklish? .....No...?....(Yes)

10: Are you allergic to anything? Lots of stuff. There's a list uploaded somewhere.

11: What’s your sexuality? Heteronormative Bisexual. I used to call it straight with a twist until I figured out there was an actual term for it. Basically, I'm emotionally attracted to men and commonly see myself in a relationship with men. (My Husband, HI.) However, I have similar attractions physically to women, but have never seen myself in a relationship with one other than physically.

12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa? Cocoa or Tea, but I'll drink any of em.

13: Are you a cat or dog person? Cat. 1000% They're chill just like me... once they're older.

14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson? Elf, probably. I love nature, I hate being allergic to it though.

15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber? Nah, I just skim youtube from time to time, no favorite.

16: How tall are you? 5'3.

17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? I'd probably keep it in the realm it's already in. So, I'm Crystal. I go by Crys (Chris) so probably Christina.. or anything that could shorten it to Chris of sorts. It's just me.

18: How much do you weigh? 175-190, depends on if I've ate fast food recently or not. More averaged at 186, but it's jumped a lot the past few months. Goal weight is 125.

19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits? Sure. I don't disbelieve. Had a thing when i was a kid a few times that make me think something exists.. whether or not we know what it is.

20: Do you like space or the ocean more? Space. Stars. I love water don't get me wrong, but I'm more curious about what we can't physically reach.

21: Are you religious? Nah.

22: Pet peeves? Liars, people who try to grind my gears, people saying "I'm going to do it just to spite you." I'm tired of toxicity of people.

23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]? Diurnal. I'm defaulted to Nocturnal, so just eat some edibles and we're in bed by 10pm! :)

24: Favorite constellation? Leo ;)

25: Favorite star? Sirius, it shines the brightest.

26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls? I don't like dolls. They're creepy.

27: Any phobias or fears? Irrational : Dolls, Being around people. Rational : Heights, Closed Spaces t-t

28: Do you think global warming is real? Fucking. Is this seriously a question? Of course it's real.

29: Do you believe in reincarnation? I actually like to. It gives me hope there's something after death.

30: Favorite movie? I'm not sure I have a favorite movie...

31: Do you get scared easily? Nah, but I love a good jump scare.

32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime? Christina - My first doggie, passed away when I was in 4th grade. She was a mini collie~ Alexi - My green/yellow parakeet. Passed away at roughly 2-3 years old. Jiggy - My gray/white beautiful DHS big boi kitty. (2006-2016) Momma - My loving calico who picked me over everyone. ;o;  (2006-2018) Wiggles - Adopted from my family, he's a tyrant! He loves his dad more than me tho... [rude] (2016-???)

33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.] You CC please.

34: What is a color that calms you? Blue. Blue is always relaxing, especially softer/darker blues.

35: Where would you like to travel and/or live? Travel wise, I want to visit a lot of places. Germany, UK, Canada... more specifically Niagara Falls.. Live wise, if I could, I'd live in Canada. However... I just want to live in the midwest, or east, somewhere more affordable in the US.

36: Where were you born? Ohio!

37: What is your eye color? Blue-gray.

38: Introvert or extrovert? 1000% introverted.

39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs? I think they're amusing as fuck. I don't believe/follow them 100%. I do like to imagine what it would be like if they were right though. I follow zodiac stuff way more than horoscope.

40: Hugs or kisses? xoxoxo - Preferably hugs, they're for everyone! *HUGS*

41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now? Scotty! ( @warpedbelief )

42: Who is someone you love deeply? @hyphenhero - My husbando.

43: Any piercings you want? I really dunno any more. The only one I've been considering lately is Daith.

44: Do you like tattoos and piercings? I don't dislike tattoos and piercings.

45: Do you smoke or have you ever done so? Cigarettes are disgusting. Be more descriptive of your "smoking." I have marijuana vapes I enjoy.

46: Talk about your crush, if you have one! Well, I married him.

47: What is a sound you really hate? Anything pitchy. My ears have been killing me the past year or so.

48: A sound you really love? Meow.

49: Can you do a backflip? HAHAHA No.

50: Can you do the splits? Almost did them on accident the other day. It really hurt. (No)

51: Favorite actor and/or actress? Do voice actors count? Because then I'm between two. Johnny Yong Bosch and Matt Mercer.

52: Favorite movie? Wasn't this asked already? I don't have one.

53: How are you feeling right now? Tired.

54: What color would you like your hair to be right now? I really want to bleach it blonde again.

55: When did you feel happiest? Maybe when we first moved into our second apartment? The rent was cheaper, it was nice. I miss freedom. Though, I also miss having a full guild of friends and getting along and having fun together.. Man I'm getting old.

56: Something that calms you down? Marijuana primarily. Hugs. Kittens.

57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!] Anxiety, Depression, Memory issues xD Honestly you should just ask if there's stuff NOT wrong with me.

58: What does your URL mean? It's a nickname a friend gave me 11 years ago. Holy crap. It's been 11 years.

59: What three words describe you the most? Sassy, Bratty, Mom-ish.

60: Do you believe in evolution? Yes.

61: What makes you unfollow a blog? Too much spam/boring content. Stuff I'm not interested in. Sometimes inactivity for years.

62: What makes you follow a blog? Stuff I'm interested in typically.

63: Favorite kind of person: People I can just talk to about anything. I like to talk. I don't like to be pestered and felt bad about not responding right away. I enjoy helping people. So I'm mostly a listener. I like to talk about stuff we're mutually interested in. Sometimes I love people I can debate with but not hate after (reasonable debates.) I guess I'm going to be that guy and copy what my friend said.. "Engaging, but not too much that I’m constantly tired. I like doing nothing, but doing nothing with the right person."

64: Favorite animal(s): Cats. All the cats.

65: Name three of your favorite blogs. I don't really actively follow any specific blog in particular! :x

66: Favorite emoticon: :smirk: (use it on discord... though if you played maplestory, it's an F3 equivalent... )

67: Favorite meme: You said that tho?

68: What is your MBTI personality type? INFJ-T

69: What is your star sign? Leo

70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog? No dog, but you'd be damn right to guess I'd train them.

71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most? Any of the fluffy pjs with a thin tank top.

72: Post a selfie or two? https://ludacryst.tumblr.com/tagged/me https://ludacryst.tumblr.com/tagged/wedding

73: Do you have platform shoes? Nah. I don't have heels either.

74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself? My memory is absolutely shit in most situations.  However, in certain and RANDOM AF situations it can be clear as day. If I want to learn/remember something? Forget about it. If I could not care less about something? You'll be damn straight I'll remember it.

75: Can you do a front flip? Lol, no.

76: Do you like birds? Yeah, cept the annoying high pitched ones T_T

77: Do you like to swim? I used to love to. I can't really be in the sun for long any more though.

78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you? Never been Ice Skating! Always wanted to try. I'd probably equally enjoy both.

79: Something you wish didn’t exist: Mosquitoes, Cancer, Violence. On the violence part... It's mostly guns. If we had swordsman style fights - It'd be more interesting.

80: Some thing you wish did exist: Cures to incurables. Cancer, Epilepsy, Autism, etc. (I'm an epilepsy survivor.)

81: Piercings you have? Had an eyebrow piercing, lost it the same month I got it to pink eye.

82: Something you really enjoy doing: Watching television. I miss reading. I have a hard time focusing on reading now.

83: Favorite person to talk to: I have 3! Erwin (@hyphenhero) - My husband~ and my friends Scott (@warpedbelief)  and Brandon.

84: What was your first impression of Tumblr? What the fuck is this and why do people use it? inb4 I replaced wordpress with it.

85: How many followers do you have? I don't really check. My Tumblr is mostly for me... and I just restarted fresh these past few months.

86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes? Maybe if I tried. Used to be able to run one in 6.

87: Do your socks always match? Yeah.

88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely? HA, Never could.

89: What are your birthstones? Peridot, Sardonyx, Spinel

90: If you were an animal, which one would you be? Cat? Yes. Spoil me.

91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be? Tulips.

92: A store you hate? Umm.... I don't know if I avoid any stores in particular....

93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day? 1-2. My stomach gets pretty upset.

94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds? Fly. Definitely. I get lost in my own mind enough.

95: Do you like to wear camo? Situationally.

96: Winter or summer? Winter 100%. Hate the heat. Love the snow.

97: How long can you hold your breath for? I don't know. Like 30 seconds maybe?

98: Least favorite person? They who will not be named. It gives them too much attention.

99: Someone you look up to: I used to look up to my mom a lot. Now I'm more-so my own person, I just do what I can to do right by me and my hubby.

100: A store you love? Uhm.. Any cheap store... I don't really have a favorite. I guess amazon for saving me gas?

101: Favorite type of shoes Skechers.

102: Where do you live? California.

103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why? Nah. I love ham too much.

104: What is your favorite mineral or gem? Cubic Zirconia actually. It's so undervalued but so pretty.

105: Do you drink milk? Used to. Not really much any more.

106: Do you like bugs? Sometimes. But not in the house.

107: Do you like spiders? Sure, they get rid of the bad bugs.

108: Something you get paranoid about? Being followed. Bugs crawling on me.

109: Can you draw: Used to be able to. Not any more.

110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked? I don't know, I usually tell people anything they ask lol.

111: A question you hate being asked? Any question I had previously already answered, and they just weren't paying attention. Anything related to me/my own working/schooling.

112: Ever been bitten by a spider? Not that I can remember.

113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach? Yeah, it's really relaxing.

114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days? Cloudy, 100%

115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now: I would like to cuddle Momma right now.. Why you gotta go and make a girl sad for survey thing? (My calico that passed away last year..)

116: Favorite cloud type: Cumulus, Cumulonimbus, and Nimbostratus. Yes I googled them for their names.

117: What color do you wish the sky was? I honestly love the colors the sky is/can be, especially at sunrise and sunset.

118: Do you have freckles? Yes, but you can only see them when I have a tan. So to anyone who hasn't seen me since I was 10, you'd never know I had them.

119: Favorite thing about a person: How they treat people. If they're kind to animals. Eyes. Definitely eyes.

120: Fruits or vegetables? Fruits @_@

121: Something you want to do right now: Play Zelda - BoTW on Hard - but... I'm lazy.

122: Is the ocean or sky prettier? Ocean. But they look best together.

123: Sweet or sour foods? Candies or actual food? Food, sweet. Candies, sour.

124: Bright or dim lights? Dim as you can go without causing me to have seizures over tiny little things.

125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature? I wish. Dragons would rock my world.

126: Something you hate about Tumblr: Yahoo owning it.

127: Something you love about Tumblr: The freedom it USED to have.

128: What do you think about the least? I dunno, I think about it the least... so it won't naturally come to me.

129: What would you want written on your tombstone? Carpe Diem ....heheheh.

130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now? Why would I name them? Again with the attention thing.

131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself? My Epilepsy. It's shown me who really gives a fuck about me, but also it's taken a lot from me.

132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures? No, I hate my teeth.

133: Computer or TV? Computer, it offers more.

134: Do you like roller coasters? Never been on one, definitely want to try.

135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness? Sometimes motion sickness, never got seasick tho.

136: Are your ears lobed or attached? Attatched.

137: Do you believe in karma? I like to believe in Karma, but I really feel like people don't get their just desserts :(

138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are? -5

139: What nicknames do you have/have had? Crys, Crysti, Cryssi, Crysii, Ludacryst, Toxie, Punky, there's probably more but effort.

140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends? I am unsure.

141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink? Yes. More than one therapist.

142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others? Yes.

143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help? Giving.

144: What makes you angry? Lots of little things. Dumb things. Mostly the way medical/doctors are here... Our president... a lot of things really.

145: How many languages do you speak fluently? I can barely manage English, you want me to learn more?!

146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries? I kinda answered this earlier.

147: Are you androgynous? No.

148: Favorite physical thing about yourself: My eye color.

149: Favorite thing about your personality: I'm more willing to let people go if they make my life worse. I used to be terrible at that.

150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person. My Mom, Scooter, Matt Mercer.. (shh)

151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose? ANY ERA WITH KNIGHTS AND KINGDOMS AND WEEEEEEE............ (I like a lot of oldie based shows.)

152: Do you like BuzzFeed? Eh.

153: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner? [If you have one.] MapleStory. Not even remotely kidding.

154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons? Yes. I'm a very touchy person if I trust the person. I prefer hugs on most though. Forehead is pretty sentimental to me.

155: Do you like to play with others’ hair? Sometimes, yeah.

156: What embarrasses you? My teeth, my weight, a lot of things.

157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious: People. Crowds. Planes. Heights. New Doctors.

158: Biggest lie you have ever told: If it's the biggest lie I've ever told, do you think I'm going to out myself on social media?

159: How many people are you following? Fuck if I know... I'm too lazy to check.

160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)? See #159

161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)? See #159

162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)? See #159

163: Last time you cried and why: It's been over a lot of things. My health, my families health, my cat, hurting myself, etc.

164: Do you have long or short hair? Medium?

165: Longest your hair has ever been: Just below my shoulders.

166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religion? Neutral mostly, because you can't prove or disprove a god exists. Just because you haven't seen something does that mean it's not there? Also, just because you believe in something, does it mean that it exists really? I'm agnostic. Though Wicca seems like a more reasonable religion in most aspects (I've dabbled in research, I hope that doesn't offend anyone.)

167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created? Not really. I just care if it's gonna blow up before I die.

168: Do you like to wear makeup? Like? Not usually, it just helps me feel a little better sometimes.

169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds? Nope.

170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully? As much as I could.

[alicenpai]

Hello ^^ Ur art is amazing! I was wondering if u can give me some tips on establishing an online presence? Things like networking and getting my art to be known

Ah hello!! thank you so much ;o; I’m not sure if I’m really qualified to answer this, IT TOOK ME REALLY LONG. AND TBH I DON’T EVEN THINK I FOLLOW MY OWN ADVICE, but *mario voice* HERE WE GOOOOOO –

Just a disclaimer before we start: some (all?) of these tips are specific to my personal experiences, and they may or may not work for you. I have been posting art online for a little over 10 years, and my experiences may not be the same as yours/other artists (I grew pretty slowly!!). Please keep that in mind. I think I kept this tutorial pretty fair, however. If they did help you I would honestly love to hear your story! ^^

1. First off, consider: what are you passionate about? What do you want others to see when they stumble on your page? 

For me I love games, so I’ll try to draw a lot of that (despite being slow at drawing), and I’d like to focus more on my OCs in the near future. I’m not saying you should limit yourself to labels, but, know where your passions lie! If you like cartoons, draw a lot of cartoons! If you like bgs, draw bgs! You like originals? Go wild! My message is that everyone has a thing or two that they really like! Show what you’re passionate about! There is always a community for your interests.

About fandoms: just remember that if you switch fandoms due to changing interests, lack of time etc. - some people may unfollow or express negative feelings, that’s normal. For me, when I completely stopped posting shounen anime content, my engagement went -WET FART WHOOPIE CUSHION SOUND- down. But hell you can’t please everyone! so just do whatever makes you happy (as long as it’s not harmful to others obviously)

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2. HAVE A CONSISTENT SCHEDULE. REMEMBER THAT YOUR HEALTH ALWAYS COMES FIRST. 

“Algorithms” (I dislike that word sometimes, it gets thrown around more often than the first slice of bread, you know?) will never cater to creators, so don’t beat yourself up if you can’t make 9000 shitty instagram reels a week just because the CEO says so. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO POST 1 DRAWING EVERY WEEK.* And remember that we are in a global pandemic (AT THE TIME OF WRITING) so it’s okay to take breaks, long breaks are cool too.

 Being consistent means maintaining a schedule - uploading every other day, 1x a week, 1-3x a month, etc. - however many times as you want. It doesn’t necessarily mean be “active”, but I think people appreciate knowing how often they can expect work from you! Because they love to see your content and they’re excited for it!

For me personally - I find that uploading 1 piece of artwork per month is usually a pretty good schedule (for a full time post-secondary student/working adult). And I know that may be shocking HAHA. but time really does fly and 1 month can go by in the blink of an eye! Many artists I know abide by that, and so do I - I don’t find that my audience dips too much, and if 5-10 people leave, it doesn’t really matter. In high school with a lighter workload, I might’ve posted 1 drawing a week (or like 3-4x a month) but as my workload grew, I had less time for personal artwork, so 1x a month is already quite good IMO! If you think 1x a month isn’t enough to grow an audience - in the meantime you can join communities and hang out with other artists, or just chat with a close group of artist friends ^^ (see #4)

* You don’t have to post 1 drawing every week, but I know other artists recommend posting text posts in between art so that people know you’re still online! Shitposts are cool (just don’t like.. spam so much that twitter bans you?)! You can talk about that new game you played during your downtime! You don’t have to do this if you don’t want. Some people don’t really like to type at all. Some artists prefer to just post, and that’s okay too.

In a previous version of this post, I said being “active” is important. Trying to adhere to other people’s advice destroyed my sense of self-esteem and productivity. Bad 2017 Alice! Bad! I’ve always struggled a lot with “being active”, because I draw slow, I often felt like I had to “catch up” to my peers, and that’s a toxic attitude to have for myself. I’d occasionally crank out shitty doodles that no one really reacted to, so it made me feel worse. I burn out, I delete posts, I produce nothing. Feel awful about myself as both a person and artist. A vicious cycle. 

In regards to being concerned over people unfollowing: my honest opinion is that people follow so many creators nowadays, that they can always look at another creator in the meantime while you’re busy (even if you’re someone’s favourite creator… most people are decent human beings and understand you need time off). It’s normal to get unfollows when you’re not posting every other day, or if you switch fandoms. Heck even for me I’ve lost like more than 100 followers in an inactive period. It’s normal. Your productivity and follower count have nothing to do with your worth as an artist.

—

3. Join communities and be nice to others! Twitter is best for networking because of the nature of the platform (i.e.: more conversational), but obviously don’t be a pushy salesman or constantly follow and unfollow to get someone’s attention and stuff like that - use your judgement. Join art discord groups, even a LOT of fandom discord servers have an art channel too! (join one of your favourite anime or etc, a lot of them have the links posted publicly on reddit), join dA groups, drawing/theme challenges (e.g. you wanna try traditional art? get inking! your favourite ship is doing a themed week? sink with them! people love ships!) Look out for redraw memes, 60/69 min challenges, current topics, etc etc.

I think nowadays it’s easier to join communities as a young artist than when I first started posting art online ^^; (LOL I just had dA) You guys should take advantage of that!

TRY OUT NEW DRAWING SITES! Artfol, Pillowfort (NSFW?), and Sheezyart are some new sites that I’ve seen floating around. Getting involved helps attract eyes to your work. Art platforms may not get you as much attention as tumblr, twitter, or instagram, since they will likely be used by more artists and less non-artists, but art sites cannot grow ant thrive unless people sign up right? I’ve tested Artfol (briefly...) and I think it’s definitely worth trying out!

This is a given, but always tag your work according to the platform. Know what tags work depending on the platform (e.g. 4378548754875 tags on 1 tweet tend to be abused by spam bots, so the more tags on twit the more suspicious the post looks IMO). Very different culture depending on the platform. On instagram and tumblr go crazy. Twitter is good with just 1 with the series, e.g. “#persona5″, or you can just mention it in the post caption, e.g. “Haru is my favourite character! (persona 5)”, because content is still searchable that way as well.

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4. Be patient - don’t worry if you don’t get noticed overnight, or in a couple months… or years even. Don’t panic. Sometimes your work is just not ready for a larger audience. EVERYONE’S EXPERIENCE IS DIFFERENT, no one’s experiences should be discounted - look at each artist’s experience/art growth individually. And this isn’t meant to be discouraging or insulting, sometimes it really is just luck that will get you noticed. 

For me personally, I’ve been posting art online since late middle school. I think it took me about SIX whole years before my art started to go somewhere (conventions helped me too), but even then it took me another TWO years AFTER to break my first 1000 followers (at least on twitter, tumblr I kept no records of as far as I know). So yes, it took me almost EIGHT years online to go somewhere. But I did start posting art when I was quite young, and I would NOT even say that my art was good until the last few years. In fact, let’s roast my old art now:

My friends gifted me a tablet for my birthday and I took to that shit like how kids inhale sugar. I’m really grateful for them. As a teen I was frustrated as to why my work wasn’t getting eyes, I considered myself “pretty good” because of the insane improvement I made in just 2 years’ time. But I think this work just wasn’t technically very strong, or appealing to others yet.

Some people are more lucky than others, but honestly don’t worry if you struggle with your online presence. A lot of other artists are in the same boat, even if they don’t post about it publicly! Even I struggle to find the right time & content to post. Sometimes you can just blame the “alg*r*thm” (derogatory). And remember, large follow counts don’t mean the artist is rich……

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5. Closing thoughts: don’t forget to have fun! (No this is not a threat). Your personal art is all about self exploration and fun (art for work is different). You should draw what you like, but it’s... not... a horrible thing to try and draw popular stuff either. I draw fanart for series that I like, because it makes me happy, but it’s also awesome to bring a smile to others’ faces too, right? I think it’s important to maintain a balance and not go overboard/sell out, you know? Don’t forget to explore your boundaries as well! Hope you can find this useful! And if any of these tips helped I’d love to hear it!

[ddrkirbyisq]

I guess I've been neglecting this for a while, huh? Christmas came and went, and my Santa duties were a success, minus some minor things like international shipments taking forever, etc.  Work still continues (lol) on Colors of Your World -- I'm 2/3rds of the way done with the "Challenge Mode" levels, which is pretty much the last thing I want to add to the game, and then I also need to write up a short post-mortem.  Hopefully people will bother playing the new version and reading the post-mortem.  =X  I guess I kind of do these things for myself sometimes, but it would feel a bit pointless if no one really even cared.  Anyways, the results for LD came out as well -- we got 27th place, yay! I feel like I had other things to write about but I seem to have mostly forgotten about them, oops.  Certain things in my life are going a lot better than before, which is really nice.  I posted my psychosomatic pain writeup, which I'm glad people actually took the time to read (sorry it was so long).  I've been continuing experiments in sichuan cooking, this time with some more authentic ingredients, and peppercorns that are not way past their prime (lol).  I made some mapo tofu which was pretty alright!  It wasn't super fiery but I also wasn't really trying to make it so (didn't add any extra spice).  More recently I had another go at shui zhu niu rou, which went quite alright, with a nice flavor profile. Helped friends with their table at Sacanime this past weekend, which was fun, and tiring.  Since then I've mostly just been winding down; feels like I don't have a bunch of deadlines and things due, so I'm actually taking it easy for once (!). I think I'm done with Hollow Knight.  I didn't 100% the game...well, actually I'm at 109% completion lol.  I completed the 4th Godmaster boss rush, which concludes with the Pure Vessel fight, so I've unlocked the last Pantheon of the Hallownest boss rush, which...I really don't think I'll do, as it's just a whole ton of fights.  I also didn't do the delicate flower quest, and didn't beat all the bosses in godhome, but...yeah, I'm done with the game.  Overall it was a fun experience, with a neat sense of exploration, especially at the point where the game really opens up and branches out.  I would agree with some other people's comments that the pacing of the game feels a little off.  I think it's partly because of the amount of backtracking involved, but also because the game world is so vast yet there are not that many "key" upgrades that really open things up...or at least that's what it felt like. I guess in Super Metroid you get so many new key upgrades: Morph Ball, High Jump, Space Jump, Screw Attack, Grapple Beam, Speed Booster, Gravity Suit, all the beam upgrades, (Super) Missiles, (Power) Bombs, and for the most part all of these upgrades are "cool new toys", some of which really change the way you can progress around through different spaces.  In Hollow Knight you get: Dash, Double Jump, a dive spell, an attack spell, a Shinespark ability, wallcling/walljump, and some other minor abilities.  I think in the end it seems like you aren't really doing a lot different than what you were doing in the beginning -- your weapon still looks and handles the same (though it does more damage), and a lot of the abilities are a little underwhelming in terms of "wow" factor.  For example there's an upgrade which lets you swim in acidic pools (instead of having them act as spikes), which is cool except it doesn't really provide anything =new= per se -- it allows access to some new areas, for sure, but there was already (non-acidic) water you could swim in before, so it's a very minor-feeling thing.  The dive spell too -- after you collect it, there's one area where you need to use it a bunch to smash through the floor, and some other crumbly floors scattered around the world, but for the most part after I got it it was one of those abilities that you only ever used to get through the associated barriers.  The "shade cloak" is another perfect example of this -- it makes your dash invincible, which is a neat upgrade, but doesn't really feel different.  It lets you traverse a new sort of obstacle, but outside of that obstacle it doesn't really feel different at all. So I think the grand scope of the game ended up feeling really drawn out when considering how little change is involved in the normal experience of walking around and exploring and fighting enemies.  I think the gameplay in the different areas was not vastly different either, which adds to the problem.  Aesthetically I think each area has a very nice and distinctive feel, and the graphics and art really work together to provide a different ambience for each area, however in terms of the actual gameplay I feel like it overall ended up felt too same-y and a bit laborious.  Especially trying to explore every corner of some of the areas (Deepnest), it felt like it just went on forever without providing any real variety. So if anything perhaps there was =too much= exploration, too many collectibles and too many areas and rooms when considering how few real upgrades you got, and I think that is part of what made it tedious.  Hollow Knight really gives you rewards all over the place, but the problem is that those rewards are really small, like a bunch of new charms which you end up not using.  At the end of the game, the way you handle bosses is still exactly the same as before, you slash at them and you dodge by jumping and moving around. All that said, the game had some really nice parts, including the Colloseum of Fools, which I think had really nice pacing and was one of the highlights of the combat system for me.  I wasn't the biggest fan of the combat system, including the "focus" mechanic -- scoring hits accumulates "soul", which you can use to heal yourself, but doing so leaves you vulnerable.  I think it's novel and a nice way of tying health to attacking, and it offers a new strategic challenge in terms of "when is a good opening to restore my health", but I actually didn't like that strategic challenge at all.  In normal exploration it's trivial to find a place to heal, so all it did was slow me down every time after I got hit since I'd have to spend a couple of seconds every time healing (this probably adds to the pacing problem).  In the boss fights, instead of focusing completely on avoiding the boss attacks, I would be trying to fit in heals whenever I could, so sometimes the battles became a really sloppy mess of "try to heal here....oops I got hit!  ok, try to heal again...ok I got it this time..." instead of being this clean fight where you are just dodging and attacking.  In other words, I felt really felt like it was a distraction. Some of the enemies were really nice to learn to fight against, for example the big knights in the City of the Tears have a very precise window of vulnerability and learning how to fight them involves keying into a nice sort of rhythm which is very satisfying to pull off.  I think if more of the combat would feel like that it would have been nice.  I think my approach to boss battle design is that enemy attacks should be consistent and heavily telegraphed, yet hard to avoid until you have practiced to the point where you have a plan for each attack.  I enjoyed the fights against nightmare Grimm and Pure Vessel for this reason (though their attacks could be a bit more telegraphed), whereas bosses such as the White Defender, Hornet, and Broken Vessel give you very little time to react to which attack they are using, which can be frustrating. I think probably my favorite 2D platform adventure boss in quite a long time has been the fight against Spectre Knight in Shovel Knight.  I think it's incredibly well-designed and I really loved everything about it.  There is one platform on either side of the battlefield and Spectre Knight floats left and right near the top of the screen, meaning you can't spam attacks against him (you need to jump on one of the platforms and attack, and he flies faster than you move), which means there's no easy way to just face-tank him and win a brawl -- you need to actually whittle his life down bit by bit and successfully avoid his attacks.  He has several distinct attacks involving his scythe which he throws in slow arcs, which are very difficult to avoid on first attempt, but if you learn to recognize them, you can definitely dodge all of them by utilizing the platforms.  Midway through the battle he raises his hand and the lights go out, which partially obscures him and his scythe, meaning it really tests your knowledge of his attack patterns even more.  It's quite a difficult fight but everything feels really fair in a very dark souls-esque way.  I love it. I got Flinthook for xmas, so I've been playing a bit of that!  I'm still getting the hang of the controls (went back to keyboard+mouse after a brief trial of doing it with gamepad), and it's definitely not a walk in the park, but so far it's a nice thing to play every so often. I finally got around to unlocking all of the characters in Smash Ultimate and am just now trying to give each and every one of them a test run so I can vaguely understand all of them and figure out which ones I'm interested in taking further.  I'm also trying to figure out my control scheme, especially since I'm heavily considering picking up Peach, and some of the float stuff is a bit easier using claw grip or a shoulder button as jump.  So far I'm trying to do a partial claw grip but we'll see how it works out.  I think if I play any character other than Peach, then the normal handhold will probably be fine, but for Peach I think it's more comfortable to do float bairs with claw. A few notes so far: Mario - He seems relatively unexciting, though standard.  I couldn't really seem to get much mileage out of him. DK - Seems actually quite good!  His normals all seem pretty great, his bair still has a bunch of range and upair is great as ever, his tilts have good range too I think, and then cargo throw them off the side or into the stage edge is actually a thing. Link - Is Link, he seems fine I guess, maybe even good, if not my style. Samus/Dark Samus - Feels really weird without a sex kick, and no missile cancelling either, so I don't really know what you're supposed to do with her now. Yoshi - Feels really great, his aerials are all amazing and they work well with the new more-floating double-jump mechanics. Kirby - Is better than in melee but still seems pretty unexciting. Fox - Feels really weird, I guess all he does now is uptilts and upairs and stuff??  The new physics mean he can't just shffl nairs in your face anymore. Pikachu - Has been my de-facto main until now, he has multihit nair fair and bair which means it's super easy to just throw out long-lasting aerial hitboxes.  He has been relatively fun to play, and a strong character too. Luigi - I don't think is for me, he apparently has some pretty broken combos, but meh. Ness - Dunno. Falcon - Falcon is hard enough to play in Melee, it's going to be even harder for me to get used to landing his aerials in this engine.  No thanks. Jigglypuff - Feels fine, but bair is no longer broken, so it kind of feels like she just has less range in general so it feels harder to get in. Peach/Daisy - I'm really interested in them, I think the way that they play neutral with floating feels a bit more natural to me in terms of movement, even though there is a lot of technical stuff to learn with them. Bowser - Feels fine I think.  I didn't play him too much. ICs - I don't really know.  Desyncs are different so I dunno. Sheik - Is weird now because she lost her old fair, so she feels really weird and it's not obvious how you are supposed to kill. Zelda - Using her lighting kicks feels a bit awkward for some reason, maybe the sweet spot is a bit tricky to get.  Her new downB is interesting. Doc - His downB is super strong for some reason??  He seems just like a better mario overall. Pichu - Like pikachu but faster, I'm starting to get why people like Pichu.  He is really fast, he can run in and aerial you, and he has these interesting combos with drag down bair. Falco - His SHL is gone and a bunch of his moves are different so I have no idea what you are supposed to do with him anymore. Marth/Lucina - Feel pretty much as you would expect, with some different physics, but dude, one thing I have to point out, it's like impossible to tell the difference between marth's sweetspot and sourspot hits now.  In melee the different sound cues were really obvious, but I really couldn't hear or tell a difference besides the % being different...I feel like this is another case of bad aesthetic design =( Young Link - I can see why people said he feels like a melee character, he actually feels super natural for some reason, besides his dair feeling a little weird.  Could be fun to play. Ganondorf - Wow he feels really sluggish in terms of fall speed and moving around.  He hits hard though. Mewtwo - WOW his tail became HUGE and now has the range of a sword.  His new fair I'm guessing is a quite potent tool.  I'm not sure how I feel about him, if I was going to play a floaty doublejump character I would probably play yoshi instead. Roy - Seems a lot better now? (again with the whole sweetspot/sourspot issue ugh).  Neutral B seems to take longer to come out which is lame. Overall I'm interested in pichu/pikachu, yoshi, young link, and of course peach.  Though DK seems quite strong lol.