#I planned out this story LAST YEAR
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had a realization today about my writing
trying to compare the passion I had for writing last year as opposed to this year is not even comparable. I was on fire last year, writing more than I’ve written in the rest of my life combined. I was extremely determined to tell my story, and I wasn’t gonna let anything stop me.
then season 2 happened 😐
honestly, I think at this point, I’ve become more focused on trying to “fix” things rather than what I was doing before. up until now, MLWTBB has been as canon compliant as possible. and I was planning on doing the same for season 2. but what happened in Plan 99 threw a wrench in everything. so now, regardless of how season 3 ends up, the story I wanted to tell will have to change radically. and while I’ve been able to rework most of it, there’s still too many things I’m gonna have to either change or put up with for season 3 that’s completely overtaken my mind. I can’t focus on where the story currently is cause I’m too focused on the mere potential of what’s going to happen in season 3.
so now the question is, do I go with my original idea of being “canon compliant”, or do I tell the story I originally wanted to tell? and what would either of those things even look like??
I still don’t even know if Tech is alive or not!!
and all of that has been swimming around in my mind SO much that I’m incapable of focusing on current projects. my feelings on the show in general have changed since Plan 99, which also doesn’t help. I simply don’t have the drive and passion I had before, all because the stupid season 2 finale ruined literally EVERYTHING.
I wanna write. I wanna write so bad. and I really wanna continue telling this story. I just... can’t right now. and idk when I’ll be able to again. and that’s extremely frustrating 😖
#I've tried writing in the next upcoming story#and only been able to get out like... a paragraph#in the last two MONTHS#and the worst part?#I've literally got the whole story just sitting in my head#I planned out this story LAST YEAR#and have only changed a few things#literally all I need to do is write it down#and I can't even do that#it's SO frustrating I can't even tell you#*sighhhhhhhhhhhhh*#MLWTBB chatter
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do u think youll do artfight this year? :3 i remember u decided not to last year but just wondering
ive been thinking about this - because sadly no i will probably not join this year either....
last time i did artfight was back in 2022, and i had 1/4 of the following i have today. even then, i got so many attacks (i think 240...? in a month) that i wasnt able to possibly attack everyone back. though i did try (i drew like almost every single day of the month, sometimes two pieces a day!!)
i had a lot of fun doing it the two years i did, but unfortunately, that year kind of spoiled the fun for me... there were people that started getting really upset i wasnt attacking them back, i just think i realized i got to the point where i couldnt play the game the same way i liked to.
so, i think in the future if i ever joined artfight, i woud probably have to make an alt account to do so, and just attack people whos characters i like (which is how i like doing artfight best!)
im not upset at anyone either, i understand artfight is all ages so imagine some of the people getting upset were probably just younger artists who wanted my attention.. but getting inbox asks why i wasnt attacking people back enough was really starting to stress me out ;_; i am sorry to disappoint if that wasnt the answer u were looking for though...!
#additionally i would have to plan to take the month off from laikas to do it!! thuogh tbh thats how its chalking up to be anyway?#i took a hiatus around july-august last year for about three months#this year im hoping to only take a 2 month hiatus and thats just for writing purposes (yknow keeping up the quality of the art and story)#but if part of the hiatus was also playing art fight as well as book keeping i think that would be fun ^_^ i just didnt plan it out enough#to do that this year!#mailbox#long post
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Darn spider monkey
"Tag! Your it!"
"...can we play something else?" huffs Tuk, her tail swishing back and forth in boredom.
"You don't like tag?" asks Marl scurrying back to their large blue friend.
"I do but we always play it! How about a new game?" The na'vi smiles as she sets her little friend on her shoulder.
"Hmmm...I can't think of anything."
"...neither can I."
"Put your foot in for grounders!" shouts one of their teachers in a nearby clearing.
"...grounders?"
"Grounders."
.
"So for those who don't know what grounders is, like Tuk and Marl, it's basically tag but the person who is it closes their eyes when on the...well not on the ground since we don't have a playground here." Explains Max.
"If the person who is it isn't on the ground and shouts grounders then whoever is on the ground is it. Now, if you're climbing high you can keep your eyes open until in a safe spot. But if your peeking to cheat then you have to go back onto the ground, that's called broken dishes."
"Why is called broken dishes?"
"...I have no idea. Anywho! If your tagged but really don't wanna be it then me or Kim will be it instead. Right Kim?"
"I prefer to be the hunter rather then the hunted."
"Got it? Okay! Game starts in 5...4..."
The younglings scattered. Some went straight for higher ground so as to have the advantage of sight while others focused on putting as much distance between them and the human male. Tuk and Marl obviously went for the high ground.
Being as it they were on her home planet, Tuk had a clear advantage in growing up in these very forests, she knew all the best ways to climb and scale these massive trees. Marl while being very small was still a ursa, creatures that typically spend the first 3 years of their life in the treetops. The two friends easily made it up 15 feet of the ground in two bounding leaps.
"This'll be so easy."
"Right? We just have to stay up here and we'll never be caught!"
..
"...this is kinda boring now." huffs Tuk. For 10 minutes they've stayed in the same spot watching their teachers chase the other younglings.
they haven't been ignored but were too far off the ground to be reached. The trunk was too smooth and the branches were too high for the humans. After multiple attempts by Max he gave up and focused on the other younglings.
"I find it entertaining! Go Pollix! GO! He's right behind you!" Marl cheered as the tighalax weaved through trees trying to lose the human. With a burst of speed he dropped down onto all fours and ran under a tunnel of roots.
"Yeah! Too bad mister Max!" the human ran even faster but this time to the right, away from the root tunnel. Tuk raised her brow as she watched him run up to a nearby tree and quickly begin climbing up.
"...Pollix get out of there! He's gonna-!"
"GROUNDERS! Got ya Pollix!"
"Darn it!" growled the cub from tunnel.
"Okay I guess it is entertaining." Tuk smiled.
...
By the 20 minute mark more than half the younglings were tired and sitting in the shade with Max. Tuk and Marl still in their spot. Kim and a few others on the ground running around.
"...wanna change spots?"
"Sure, how about that sunny spot over there?"
"Looks good."
"...wait. They're planning something."
"Who?"
"Kim and Piper." Marl pointed and true enough the adult was whispering something to the child while occasionally glancing towards them...while leaving just the smallest bit of space between them. When the girl smiled and nodded Kim grinned as well and together sprinted towards the tree they were on.
But rather than try and climb it as they had thought they would do, Kim turned and squatted against the tree.
Knee, shoulder, then waiting for Kim to stand, and finally using the adults palms as the final step Piper jumped and grabbed the lowest vine.
Piper was now it.
Piper was now scaling the tree like a prolemuris. The human youngling turned and swung her body in ways that the older humans couldn't and thus helped her go higher and higher.
"...We should start climbing."
"Way ahead of you!"
....
Together the humans managed to tag Tuk as she was a larger target than Marl.
With Kim's help Piper could reach the lowest vine or branch and from there she was set. granted she was not as fast as them but she had knocked down vines for others to climb so as to tag Tuk and Marl, the only two haven't been it yet!
A tragedy that must be corrected!!
The trees were no longer safe for the na'vi or ursa nor were the ground as that was the adult's domain.
While Tuk was bigger than the adult and therefore could outpace her she hadn't realized how committed human adults are to games. Even if it was children's game.
Deliberately Kim would go after Marl, the slower of the two, and make a show of almost catching them. Tuk, not wanting her friend to be it would always try to reach Marl first and carry them away. An abrupt stop would be Tuk's only warning before the human turned towards her and lunged.
If that didn't work then she would use the smallest youngling's affections to her advantage. Thrice she had ordered Anwred and Tarlak to hug her legs thus slowing her down.
"...I'm done..."
"Me too..."
"You guys did good, miss Kim hardly ever uses Piper in grounders." smiles Pollix.
"How does she do that? I mean, Spider, my human friend, can do that too but he grew up doing that. So how does Piper do it?"
"Apparently she has other teachers that taught her how to that and is just one of those humans whose better at climbing than others."
"Yeah! She used to climb miss Kim and mister Max all the time! Right onto their shoulders!" chirped Xw.
"She's a little spider monkey alright." said Kim walking over with said spider monkey clinging onto her back smiling rather proudly.
"...darn spider monkey." muttered Marl while Tuk laughed.
#no beta we die like men#humans are space orcs#the adventures of kim and max running a space child centre#played grounders today and 'Piper' showed me how much her spider monkey abilites have grown since she last climbed me like a tree#the child is goddamn spider girl#could not get her unless by luck or actually making a plan#also preschoolers were out watching us play and I totally used that in my advantaged. they love me and i bribed them with a story earlier#I ordered them to block the way down on the jungle gym or to hug the older kids#its a dirty tactic but it works and makes it more fun#also they're too cute to get mad at!#imagine a doe eyed 3 year old huggin you with a smile#can't be mad
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Kingdom of Ash Chapter 61
Chapter; Highlights (okay the entire chapter is a highlight)🤣
As requested @mysterylilycheeta I NEED TO SQUEAL IN WYVERN FANGIRL WITH YOU NOW CAUSE OH M GOODNESS THIS CHAPTER ON SO MANY LEVELS I JUST AHAKWIHUHFEJLZXBKEKA
Agony was a song in Lorcan's blood, his bones, his breath.
Every step of the horse, every leap she made over body and debris, sent it ringing afresh. There was no end, no mercy from it. It was all he could do to keep in the saddle, to cling to consciousness.
To keep his arm around Elide.
She had come for him. Had found him, somehow, on this endless battlefield.
His name on her lips had been a summons he could never deny, even when death had held him so gently, nestled beneath all those he'd felled, I, and waited for his last breaths.
And now, charging toward that too-distant keep, so far behind the droves of soldiers and riders racing for the gates, he wondered if these minutes would be his last. Her last.
She had come for him.
Lorcan managed to glance toward the dam on their right. Toward the ruk rider signaling that it was only a matter of minutes until it unleashed hell over the plain.
He didn't know how it had become weakened. Didn't care.
Still Elide kept urging the horse onward, kept them on as straight a path toward the distant keep as possible.
No ruk would come to sweep them up. No, his luck had been spent in surviving this long, in her finding him. His power would do nothing against that water.
The farthest lines of panicked soldiers appeared, and Farasha charged past them.
Elide let out a sob, and he followed the line of her sight.
To the keep gate, still open.
"Faster, Farasha!" She didn't hide the raw terror in her voice, the desperation.
Once the dam broke, it would take less than a minute for the tidal wave to reach them.
She had come for him. She had found him.
The world went quiet. The pain in his body faded into nothing. Into something secondary.
Lorcan slid his other arm around Elide, bringing his mouth close to her ear as he said, "You have to let me go."
Each word was gravelly, his voice strained nearly to the point of uselessness.
Elide didn't shift her focus from the keep ahead. "No."
That gentle quiet flowed around him, clearing the fog of pain and battle. "You have to. You have to, Elide. I'm too heavy-and without my weight, you might make it to the keep in time."
"No." The salt of her tears filled his nose.
Lorcan brushed his mouth over her damp cheek, ignoring the roaring pain in his body. The horse galloped and galloped, as if she might outrace death itself.
"I love you," he whispered in Elide's ear. "I have loved you from the moment you picked up that axe to slay the ilken." Her tears flowed past him in the wind. "And I will be with you ..." His voice broke, but he made himself say the words, the truth in his heart. "I will be with you always."
He was not frightened of what would come for him once he tumbled off the horse. He was not frightened at all, if it meant her reaching the keep.
So Lorcan kissed Elide's cheek again, allowed himself to breathe in her scent one last time. "I love you," he repeated, and began to withdraw his arms from around her waist.
Elide slapped a hand onto his forearm. Dug in her nails, right into his skin, fierce as any ruk.
"No."
There were no tears in her voice. Nothing but solid, unwavering steel.
"No," she said again. The voice of the Lady of Perranth.
Lorcan tried to move his arm, but her grip would not be dislodged.
If he tumbled off the horse, she would go with him.
Together. They would either outrun this or die together.
"Elide-"
But Elide slammed her heels into the horse's sides.
Slammed her heels into the dark flank and screamed, "FLY, FARASHA." She cracked the reins. "FLY, FLY, FLY!"
And gods help her, that horse did.
As if the god that had crafted her filled the mare's lungs with his own breath, Farasha gave a surge of speed.
Faster than the wind. Faster than death.
Farasha cleared the first of the fleeing Darghan cavalry. Passed desperate horses and riders at an all-out gallop for the gates.
Her mighty heart did not falter, even when Lorcan knew it was raging to the point of bursting.
Less than a mile stood between them and the keep.
But a thunderous, groaning crack cleaved the world, echoing off the lake, the mountains.
There was nothing he could do, nothing that brave, unfaltering horse could do, as the dam ruptured.
Rowan made himself stand there, to watch the last moments of the Lady of Perranth and his former commander. It was all he could offer: witnessing their deaths, so he might tell the story to those he encountered. So they would not be forgotten.
The roaring of the oncoming wave became deafening, even from miles away.
Still Elide and Lorcan raced, Farasha passing horse after horse after horse.
Even up here, would they escape the wave's reach? Rowan dared to survey the battlements, to assess if he needed to get the others, needed to get Aelin, to higher ground.
But Aelin was not at his side.
She was not on the battlement at all.
Rowan's heart halted. Simply stopped beating as a ruddy-brown ruk dropped from the skies, spearing for the center of the plain.
Arcas, Borte's ruk. A golden-haired woman dangling from his talons.
Aelin. Aelin was—
Arcas neared the earth, talons splaying.
Aelin hit the ground, rolling, rolling, until she uncoiled to her feet.
Right in the path of that wave.
"Oh gods," Fenrys breathed, seeing her, too.
They all saw her.
The queen on the plain.
The endless wall of water surging for her.
The keep stones began shuddering. Rowan threw out a hand to brace himself, fear like nothing he had known ripping through him as Aelin lifted her arms above her head.
A pillar of fire shot up around her, lifting her hair with it.
The wave roared and roared for her, for the army behind her.
The shaking in the keep was not from the wave.
It was not from that wall of water at all.
Cracks formed in the earth, splintering across it. Spiderwebbing from Aelin.
"The hot springs," Chaol breathed. "The valley floor is full of veins into the earth itself."
Into the burning heart of the world.
The keep shook, more violently this time.
The pillar of fire sucked back into Aelin.
She held out a hand before her, her fist closed.
As if it would halt the wave in its tracks.
He knew then. Either as her mate or carranam, he knew.
"Three months," Rowan breathed.
The others stilled.
"Three months," he said again, his knees wobbling. "She's been making the descent into her power for three months."
Every day she had been with Maeve, bound in iron, she had gone deeper. And she had not tapped too far into that power since they'd freed her because she had kept making the plunge.
To gather up the full might of her magic.
Not for the Lock, not for Erawan.
But for Maeve's death blow.
A few weeks of descent had taken her powers to devastating levels. Three months of it
…
Holy gods. Holy rutting gods.
And when her fire hit the wall of water now towering over her, when they collided —
"GET DOWN!" Rowan bellowed, over the screaming waters. "GET DOWN NOW!"
His companions dropped to the stones, any within earshot doing the same.
Rowan plummeted into his power. Plummeted into it fast and hard, ripping out any remaining shred of magic.
Elide and Lorcan were still too far from the gates. Thousands of soldiers were still too far from the gates as the wave crested above them.
As Aelin opened her hand toward it.
Fire erupted.
Cobalt fire. The raging soul of a flame.
A tidal wave of it.
Taller than the raging waters, it blasted from her, flaring wide.
The wave slammed into it. And where water met a wall of fire, where a thousand years of confinement met three months of it, the world exploded.
Blistering steam, capable of melting flesh from bone, shot across the plain.
With a roar, Rowan threw all that remained of his magic toward the onslaught of steam, a wall of wind that shoved it toward the lake, the mountains.
Still the waters came, breaking against the flames that did not so much as yield an inch.
Maeve's death blow. Spent here, to save the army that might mean Terrasen's salvation. To spare the lives on the plain.
Rowan gritted his teeth, panting against his fraying power. A burnout lurked, deadly close.
The raging wave threw itself over and over and over into the wall of flame.
Rowan didn't see if Elide and Lorcan made it into the keep. If the other soldiers and riders on the plain stopped to gape.
Princess Hasar said, rising beside him, "That power is no blessing."
"Tell that to your soldiers," Fenrys snarled, standing, too.
"I did not mean it that way," Hasar snipped, and awe was indeed stark on her face.
Rowan leaned against the battlements, panting hard as he fought to keep the lethal steam from flowing toward the army. As he cooled and sent it whisking away.
Solid hands slid under his arms, and then Fenrys and Gavriel were there, propping him up between them.
A minute passed. Then another.
The wave began to lower. Still the fire burned.
Rowan's head pounded, his mouth going dry.
Time slipped from him. A coppery tang filled his mouth.
The wave lowered farther, raging waters quieting. Then roaring turned to lapping, rapids into eddies.
Until the wall of flame began to lower, too. Tracking the waters down and down and down. Letting them seep into the cracks of the earth.
Rowan's knees buckled, but he held on to his magic long enough for the steam to lessen.
For it, too, to be calmed.
It filled the plain, turning the world into drifting mist. Blocking the view of the queen in its center.
Then silence. Utter silence.
Fire flickered through the mist, blue turning to gold and red. A muted, throbbing glow.
Rowan spat blood onto the battlement stones, his breath like shards of glass in his throat.
The glowing flames shrank, steam rippling past. Until there was only a slim pillar of fire, veiled in the mist-shrouded plain.
Not a pillar of fire.
But Aelin.
Glowing white-hot. As if she had given herself so wholly to the flame that she had become fire herself.
The Fire-Bringer someone whispered down the battlements.
The mist rippled and billowed, casting her into nothing but a glowing effigy.
The silence turned reverent.
A gentle wind from the north swept down. The veil of mist pulled back, and there she was.
She glowed from within. Glowed golden, tendrils of her hair floating on a phantom wind.
"Mala's Heir," Yrene breathed.
Down on the plain, Elide and Lorcan had halted.
The wind pushed away more of the drifting mist, clearing the land beyond Aelin.
And where that mighty, lethal wave had loomed, where death had charged toward them, nothing remained at all.
For three months, she had sung to the darkness and the flame, and they had sung back.
For three months, she had burrowed so deep inside her power that she had plundered undiscovered depths. While Maeve and Cairn had worked on her, she had delved. Never letting them know what she mined, what she gathered to her, day by day by day.
A death blow. One to wipe a dark queen from the earth forever.
She'd kept that power coiled in herself even after she'd been freed from the irons. Had struggled to keep it down these weeks, the strain enormous. Some days, it had been easier to barely speak. Some days, swaggering arrogance had been her key to ignoring it.
Yet when she had seen that wave, when she had seen Elide and Lorcan choosing death together, when she had seen the army that might save Terrasen, she'd known. She'd felt the fire sleeping under this city, and knew they had come here for a reason.
She had come here for this reason.
A river still flowed from the dam, harmless and small, wending toward the lake.
Nothing more.
Aelin lifted a glowing hand before her as blessed, cooling emptiness filled her at last.
Slowly, starting from her fingertips, the glow faded.
As if she were forged anew, forged back into her body.
Back into Aelin.
Clarity, sharp and crystal clear, filled its wake. As if she could see again, breathe again.
Inch by inch, the golden glow faded into skin and bone. Into a woman once more.
Already, a white-tailed hawk launched skyward.
But as the last of the glow faded, disappearing out through her toes, Aelin fell to her knees.
Fell to her knees in the utter silence of the world, and curled onto her side.
She had the vague sense of strong, familiar arms scooping her up. Of being carried onto a broad feathery back, still in those arms.
Of soaring through the skies, the last of the mist rippling away into the afternoon sun.
And then sweet darkness.
#Chapter 61#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#Lorcan Salvaterre#Elide Lochan#Elorcan#Aelin Galathynius#Chaol Westfall#Rowan Whitethorn#Fenrys Moonbeam#Gavriel#First Read along with me NO SPOILERS PLEASE though warning for post & tags up to KoA 61 & more reacts/notes/quotes in tags below#Agony was in his very blood-Summons-She had come for him-Let go.No.Always?-She came this far-THANK YOU ELIDE-The voice of Perranth#My lady-Together till the end-if only the horse could Fly-A prayer-Made himself watch-But Aelin-hell yes-So he might tell the story#Not forgotten-For her friends-To get Aelin-Where was she?MY HEART-The shaking was her-The springs-He knew-Three months#Every single day-But for Maeve’s meant for Maeve-she knew he’d know-his power the counteracting-GET FUCKING DOWN-She had not given up#A thousand years for here months endured & one moment-Spent here-To save them-Burnout or Blessing-UTTER Awe-A miracle#A curse to enemies-All of them really-she drained the bank & there he was-THE FIRE BRINGER-glowing blinding white out for the world#she became the flame-Master of death-heir of Fire-Nothing remained-That’s what was eating her alive-Its grief but more-she was still—#capturing flame-She didnt want2lose it either-It was all of it-But also Aelin had a plan-be glad4it-They would save them she didnt need it#Back to Aelin-She began fighting-Quiet-Fell to what he knows-Sweet darkness-the power dive#No.#You know it’s bad when Rowan’s prayingWhen even Yrene is praying but not save to give peace&painless ends but Aelin’s off to save the day#Not for the Lock not for Erawan. But for Maeve's death blow. & now to save Elide; Marion would be proud#the way he’s thinking about I’ve gotta get Aelin out of here#Into the burning heart of the world. — the world shuddered#Aelin I am a god Galathynius-The raging soul of a flame-thats her-shed made the final descent right then for Elide-Rowan plummeted for her#Spent here to save the army that might mean Terrasens salvation-not2kill2spareNoblessinNocurseMiracleWomanA war won-friends held him up#One hell of a rumor-Gentle from the north-Malas Heir-she had sung to the darkness&flame&they had sung backthe same story#GETDOWN.Back into Aelin he was there there how did he get there so fast?sweet darkness 1 last time
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Childhood Friends Au: Danny's in Gotham Again
when the wool is off your eyes you'll stop counting sheep at night cause you'll eat your fill of them during the daytime
A few weeks after Danny’s visit to Gotham, he buys an apartment in the city. It’s this little thing, a studio apartment on the same street he grew up in. In Crime Alley. When he tells his parents, they protest heavily. They don’t think it's safe. They think he should reconsider. There were plenty of apartments and places to live somewhere else. And what about college?
Danny doesn’t think he’ll go to college. He isn’t sure what he wants to do, now that being an astronaut is off the table. It’d be a waste of money to go without a goal in mind, he thinks. He says he’ll take a gap year and apply at one of the community colleges funded by the Wayne Corporation, possibly. It just wasn’t in the cards right now.
“If things get tough,” He says at dinner that night, “then I can talk to the Waynes. I’m friends with the family, remember?” He ended up getting Bruce’s number in his phone again before he left, and in the process got Tim’s as well. They don’t talk much, Danny isn’t sure what to say. But he sends Tim memes whenever he comes across one and thinks he’ll like. Tim sends memes back in return.
His parents do remember. They remember. They also remember the horrified shriek that echoed through the house when Danny learned of Jason’s passing. They remember running up the stairs and bursting into their son’s room and finding him sobbing into his bed, curled up like a little kid, like he was in pain. He lost his voice that day, stuck between screaming out his grief and sobbing it.
They’re still not sure if they should let him go.
In the end, Danny wins them out, and he lets them help him search for an apartment. They take a break from their lab work to help search for cheap furniture to buy. They may have more money than when they were in Gotham, but that frugal part of you never fully goes away. They all agree that they don’t want Danny to be seen carrying in nice-looking furniture when he moves in.
He ends up with a basic furniture set, all mismatched, and in the warm summer of June, his parents rent out a u-haul and drive him down to Gotham to move in. They meet the landlord when they arrive, a skinny and frail old man with wispy white hair and a wrinkled face. He gives Danny the keys and tells him what apartment number he is, and then he leaves.
His parents help him move in. They help him carry his heavy furniture up to the second floor, where his apartment is. Danny isn’t sure if he wants them to help. His mom and dad are strong, but they are getting old, closer to their fifties now that their children are grown. His dad’s hair is slowly beginning to thin, and rather than the white eating at the sides of his head, it now streaks through his hair like salt-and-pepper. His mom’s hair is graying out too, and there are more lines in their faces than he remembers there being.
When he voices his concerns, his mom laughs spiritedly and says that they may be getting old, but they are still as spry as when they were in their twenties. Danny isn’t sure if he believes them or not. He can see his dad struggle a bit when they return to get his bed frame, and they have to take a break before they go back down for the rest of their things.
Five years ago, his dad could do this without breaking a sweat. It forces a heavy thing in the back of Danny’s throat. (He is less afraid of his own death than he is of his loved ones, and while he has always felt rocky with his parents, he still loves them more than anything else.)
Danny’s apartment is exactly as he would have expected it to be: shabby and worn through. The entire room smells like stale cigarette smoke and weed, nicotine stains the wall with poorly covered bullet holes, and stains in the carpet that are a color he can’t discern. The fridge has a broken light and when he tries to turn on the gas stove, it click-click-clicks before lighting, fire fwooshing out while the smell of gas fills the air. There’s rat droppings in the cupboards and the closet-like bathroom is just as bad.
The ghostly part of him can sense the heavy stench of death in the room; people have died in this room. People have died in every room of this building, he thinks. They have died on the streets outside and in the alleys squeezed between them. He can feel it like a heavy fog in the air.
It is painfully nostalgic, a bittersweet feeling in his chest that he grimaces to.
When the last box is placed in his apartment, his parents offer to help unpack. They are hesitant to leave and Danny knows it, although he doesn’t know if it’s from empty nest syndrome or because it's Gotham. He thinks it might be both. He is their youngest child finally leaving home to a city known for its danger.
“Are you sure you don’t want us to stay behind, sweetie?” His mother asks, a frown she tries to hide settled in the creases of her face. She fiddles with her hands, a nervous habit Danny has since noticed when she feels truly unsure and doesn’t need to hide it. Hesitancy looms over her like a heavy cloud.
His dad jumps in hastily, splaying his hands and smiling painfully wide to hide the glistening in his eyes. “You’re mother’s right! We can help you get everything set up, champ. I could probably do something with that stove of yours to make it faster!” He says, his voice still booming like it always does even if there’s a stumble in his words.
It makes his heart squeeze, knowing just how much they care. It was hard last summer, telling him that he was the Phantom. Terrifying, actually. They couldn’t comprehend it. He hadn’t felt his heart beat that fast in years when he stood in front of them at the kitchen table and told them he was a halfa, begging them to believe that ghosts weren’t inherently evil.
His parents were people of science, however, and after much, much shock, they slowly came to terms with it. How could they not? The evidence was right in front of them. Their son was dead-alive, alive-dead. Somewhere stuck in the between. The tears they shed that night could fill a river, moving from the kitchen to the living room as Danny explains how he died.
(When Danny tells them that he died after a week Jason did, his mom and dad look horrified. His mom covers her mouth when he adds that it was his idea to go inside it, his dad looks ashy pale, gripping his pant legs so tight that his knuckles turn white. There is a conclusion coming to their minds that he can tell they don’t like.)
(“You’ve always hated our inventions, Danny.” Mom says in a hushed voice, and Danny winces at the wording, sinking into the back of the cushions in shame. He never thought that his parents noticed. Mom quickly grabs his arm, “No, no, there’s nothing to be ashamed of Danny. We were… perhaps too careless with our inventions, too enthusiastic. You had every right to hate the things we made when they had a tendency to… to malfunction.”)
(Malfunction is a delicate way of putting it, when Danny remembers every time they had to evacuate their old apartment complex because whatever half-baked creation his parents made inevitably blew up into ash and smoke. There were soot marks permanently stained into the ceiling.)
(Her hand slides down and grabs his, and she cups it in both of her hands, squeezing tightly. He forces himself to look up, and there is a look like her heart breaking when he looks into his mother’s eyes. “You’ve always avoided the lab after we moved, Danny. And you had every right to, so why on Earth did you ever think about going into the portal?”)
(Danny struggles to come up with an adequate answer, a way to verbalize what came over him that day five years ago. The answer is there, hanging in the air like a knot in a noose. He opens his mouth, and then closes it.)
(Finally, with a tongue made of lead, he shrugs lamely and looks away. “I didn’t know there was an on button inside it.” He mumbles, and despite being the truth it feels like a lie. But that is the truth. He didn’t know there was an on button inside it. So he didn’t care what happened.)
(Something dulls in mom’s eyes, like she thought of something else that Danny hadn’t said. Her eyes shimmer, and she squeezes them shut, breathing in so deep that it shakes. And then she pulls him into a hug, a hand burying into his hair and pressing him close. “It must have hurt so much, sweetheart. I’m so sorry.”)
(It is something that Danny doesn’t expect her to say, like missing the last step of the stairs. It startles him so much he laughs this short, bark of a thing. He feels his dad press against his back and wrap his big arms around them, his nose pushed into his hair.)
(Because yeah. Yeah, it did hurt. It hurt more than anything else he’s ever felt before. It had torn him apart and sewn him back together again, only to rinse and repeat. The pain was nothing he ever spoke to Sam or Tucker about, and it was something they never brought up. No, that’s not true. If they ever brought it up, Tucker would call it a zap. As if Danny only experienced a mild static shock. Like it was painless. It’s a pretty lie that Danny lets him and Sam believe.)
(His eyes sting and water immediately wobbles into his vision, coming up with such a force that he doesn’t even need to blink before it spills over. “Yeah.” He forces out, voice unexpectedly rough and cracking. “Yeah, it- it hurt. A lot.”)
He tells them about fighting the Lunch Lady a month later. He tells them about finding Jason. It comes spilling out like a waterfall. “I found him, mom.” He says, holding onto her tight while she keeps him tucked under his chin like a little kid. The secret of Jason being Robin stays hidden under his tongue, it is not his secret to tell. Not his identity to expose. He grips her tighter. “I found him, mom. Right there in the Ghost Zone, and he was my Jason. He wasn’t an echo or a— an imprint of him.”
Mom is silent; quiet and attentive, and so is dad, who rubs his large hands up and down Danny’s spine in an attempt to soothe him. It only works a little. Danny breathes in like a gasp as the urge to cry overcomes him again. He always avoids talking about Jason, his grief is like a never-healing scab that can be picked off at any time. It is ingrained into his core.
“And then I lost him.” He forces out, a sob layering under his words that he chokes on and swallows. The hand on his back stills, and he can feel mom and dad breathe in like a question. He turns his head and pushes it into mom’s shoulder. “He disappeared, mom. Just— just gone.”
“And he didn’t move on.” He says, voice snarling like teeth biting before his mom can ask, because he knows that’s what she was going to ask. It’s what Sam and Tucker asked when he came to them in tears hours after he found Jason gone. It’s what Jazz said when he finally told her about it. It’s what every one of his ghosts asked when he told them about it and begged for their help.
Danny grits his teeth and tries not to dig his nails into mom’s clothes as a fresh wave of tears run down his face. “His haunt is still there. If Jason really moved on it would have disappeared with him. That’s how it works. But it’s still in the zone, so Jason’s out there I just don’t know where.”
(Sam once asks him why Danny didn’t just move on from it a year after Jason’s disappearance. She asked him why he didn’t give it up. Danny nearly saw red, and nearly bit her head off for it. It was incomprehensible to him to just stop looking for Jason, to give up. Not when he was out in the zone somewhere. Because he had to be in the zone.)
(Danny once tried to take Jason through the portal with him, and much like what happened to Kitty, it didn’t work. Jason was too tied to the ghost zone to leave.)
(Some bonds are just unbreakable, he thinks. Bonds forged through blood and time and trust, and when you’re on the streets of Gotham, you hoard what little trust you have in someone like a dragon with its gold. It is scarcely given and fiercely kept.)
“I’ve been looking for him.” Danny whispers when talking becomes too hard for him, when it runs the risk of him crying. “When- when I’m not fighting ghosts or, or in school or with my friends, I’ve been looking for him.” He has explored the Ghost Zone in every reach he can. He has met so many people. He’s met the ghosts of aliens from planets in every corner of the galaxy. He has met gods or god-like beings and their disciples.
He’s met famous scholars and writers (he’s gotten the autographs of all of Jason’s favorite writers). He has found entire cities that have so much life in it that it's been permanently etched into the ghost zone, like a mirror version of itself.
He’s visited the ghostly vision of Gotham so many times, and he avoids the imprint of Wayne Manor like the plague. There are ghostly newspapers that he reads. There are the ghosts of Martha and Thomas Wayne in many of them.
Jason’s haunt connects to Wayne Manor, but it is also the street they grew up in. It is a small brick building with a door that leads to Jason’s room. A ghost knows when someone enters their haunt, it alerts them like a doorbell in the back of their mind. A foreign ecto-signature in a place drenched in your own.
Danny visits it every time he goes into the Ghost Zone. It’s always his first stop.
He tells his parents all of it. He tells them of the ghosts he’s met, of the places he’s seen. And when he feels brave, he tells them about Rath and the terror that his future self brings him. He keeps some details hidden, the ones that he can afford to keep without muddling up the story.
(Rath is a tall, spindly thing, like a funhouse mirror version of Danny himself. He has arms that are much too long and legs that are much too tall, with skinny fingers that extend into claws.He wears his suit the same as Danny does, with it partially undone and the sleeves wrapped around his waist.)
(There is a black hole in his chest that is much bigger than Danny’s own. It takes up his chest cavity and drips the same, viscous black liquid as the tears falling from his eyes. Danny never forgets his voice; a scraping, quiet thing like he’s screamed himself hoarse. Rath has a voice like goosebumps, and it haunts Danny like a bump in the night.)
Danny speaks and speaks and speaks until he can’t think of anything else to speak of. He is tired and sad, and it feels like his heart has been ripped out and rubbed raw again. And yet, he also feels so much better. Like a long heavy weight has been taken off his chest.
Yeah, last summer was hard. His parents walked on eggshells around him, and they forced themselves to unlearn their bias of ghosts. It was more than Danny could have ever dreamed of, and when they felt ready for it, they asked him more about the ghost zone.
He smiles sadly at his dad, “I think fixing the stove can be a priority another time, dad.” He says, watching him wilt and his smile fall. Jack Fenton was always so good at making himself look like a kicked puppy. “I can handle unpacking by myself, I promise.”
His parents still look so unsure, like they want to argue. Danny watches his mom purse her lips tightly, confliction running across her face like a datastream. She takes dad’s hand, squeezing their fingers together despite the droop in her shoulders.
“Oh, alright then, I suppose.” She relents, her hand placing on Jack’s arm. “I guess we could go, we’re just going to miss you so much, Danny.”
Tears seem to have won over his dad, and Jack Fenton sniffs back before he can cry properly. “Our little boy, all grown up.” He says, voice wobbling. It makes Danny laugh, and it makes his heart pang. His smile grows impossibly wider and so much fonder. “You’ve become such a kind, wonderful young man, Danno. We’re so proud of you.”
Danny laughs again, and it cracks. “You’re gonna make me cry, dad.” (He feels a welling of guilt in his gut that he ignores — he doesn’t feel like a kind man. He doesn’t feel like a good one either. Not with what he plans to do.)
His father holds out his arms in hopefulness, “One last hug for your old man before we head out?” He asks, mustering up a smile on his face.
Danny barrels into him, nearly knocking his dad over with an oomph. He’s as tall as him now, but he still feels little in his bear hugs. With arms wrapping around his middle, Danny hugs his father tight and breathes him in one last time.
“Careful there, Danno.” He laughs, patting Danny’s back roughly. “You’ll break my ribs with that ghostly strength of yours!” But he holds on just as tight.
Out of spite, Danny bends back and lifts him off his feet, laughing when Jack tenses up and nearly scrambles out of surprise. His mom laughs with him, stepping back to give them room for the few seconds that dad is in the air.
When it’s his mom’s turn, Danny has to hunch to hug her. Something bittersweet to him as she plants a kiss on his forehead and says that he’ll always be her baby. “Even if you do have that horrid smoking habit.” She adds on with a disapproving eyebrow raise.
Danny turns red in embarrassment, and walks them back to the GAV. Gothamites of all kinds slow to stop and boggle at the monstrous, road-illegal thing that is parallel-parked next to the curbside. In the past, Danny would have died with mortification to be seen with it. Now it just makes him laugh. Before he goes back into the apartment building, he buys a newspaper from a nearby convenience store.
The first thing he does when he gets back up to his room is one: make a mental note to buy a bicycle chain lock for the door. The locks jiggle and there are splinters along the side that show signs of it being broken into in the past. The second thing he does is pull his cigarettes out of his pocket and light one.
Danny starts to unpack with a cigarette hanging from his mouth, placing the newspaper he bought onto the counter. He has a cheap loveseat that he pushes off to the side, and he moves the boxes into the kitchen. It’s a matter of organization that Danny has to think about before he does anything.
It’s as he’s pushing the sofa up against the wall facing the windows that his phone rings a familiar tune: Sam. The phone is fished out before he can think about it and when he stares down at the screen, he realizes it's a facetime call.
He presses answer and walks over to prop his phone up onto the counter. The smiling faces of Sam and Tucker greet him, rather than just Sam. Immediately, Danny grins. “Hey Danny.” Sam greets, smiling a dark-painted lazy thing. From the background it looks like they’re in Tucker’s room. Sam is in Tucker’s desk chair, and Tucker is behind her, leaning against it. “Have you moved in yet?”
Danny pulls the cigarette from his mouth and huffs, a cloud of smoke following his breath. “Yeah! It’s a shithole.” He grins lopsidedly, and his feet carry him off to the side to allow Sam and Tucker view of his apartment. He lets thirty seconds pass, allowing the both of them to really see the rest of the room. And then he steps back into frame.
Sam and Tucker both look like they’re trying not to look judgemental, like they’re trying to hide a grimace that Danny sees anyway with the small turns at the corner of their mouths. He grins wider, mirth filling his lungs. “I know, it looks awful doesn’t it?”
“It’s— it’s not so bad.” Sam says with a strain in her voice, a forced smile on her face that tries to be reassuring. Tucker nods along readily, and he looks just as unsure as Sam does. Danny stifles laughter behind his teeth.
“No, no, it looks bad,” He takes a drag of his cigarette, shaking his head. “You can say it, I won’t get offended. It’s a fucking apartment in crime alley. Of course it looks bad.”
Sam remains silent, a rearing of her stubbornness showing itself. Tucker takes a different approach, and heaves a dramatic sigh of relief, slumping like a weight. “Okay, you’re right. It looks bad.” He frowns, “Sorry, man.”
While Danny snorts, Sam sighs. “Yeah, it looks bad. What even are those stains?” She asks, and both she and Tucker lean closer in tandem to the screen, eyes squinting at the floor behind him. Danny glances at the floor, and shrugs.
“Blood, probably.” He says, and while years in Amity Park have accustomed him to a clean environment, the desensitization of Gotham still remains. Tucker and Sam both make faces and lean away, as if the stain itself was capable of passing through to them. “Yeah, there are bullet holes in the walls.”
“Are you sure it’s safe to be there?” Tucker asks, a furrow appearing between his brows. He adjusts his glasses and leans against the chair. Sam is frowning heavily, and Danny can already see her thinking up of a new way to fix the problem.
“Oh, I never said this place was safe.” Danny tells him cheerily, taking a last hit of his cigarette before placing the dead stick onto the counter. He itches for another one. Instead he walks over to the shelf his parents brought in and starts moving it. “It’s Crime Alley, Tuck. Safe isn’t even in its vocabulary.”
Tucker and Sam look like they’ve both swallowed a lemon.
“But it’s where I want to be right now.” He says, grunting quietly when the shelf is against the wall he wants it to be, near the short hallway leading to the front door. He can push it in front of it if someone tries to break in. “And Crime Alley’s apartments are the only ones I can really afford right now without mooching off my parents, and I’d rather not depend on them.”
He can hear the disapproving hesitance from where he stands. And he ignores it.
Danny walks back into frame, lifting up a box onto the counter. He hums lightly, fingers run over the tape keeping it shut. “Why do you even want to be in Gotham, Danny?” Sam asks, and she sounds genuinely perplexed. Danny stills. “I thought this place only had bad memories for you.”
His blood turns cold, and like a dime being flipped his slow heartbeat fills his ears. “It does.” He replies automatically, before he can think. Shit, shit. He knows that Sam or Tucker would ask that question, and yet he still feels unprepared for it. His heart pulses quickly against his ribcage, knocking, asking him what he’s going to tell them that isn’t the truth.
Danny stammers, “I mean— I just— I guess I felt nostalgic.” He says, and it sounds like a weak defense. He looks away, finding himself instinctively scratching his jaw. A new tick of his when he’s nervous. From the corner of his eye, he sees Sam and Tucker both narrow their eyes at him.
He cannot tell them the real reason why he’s moved back to Gotham. He can’t tell them of the little secret and vow he told himself five years ago, the one that’s been left to fester and burn like an open wound close to his core. The one that, if he thinks too much about it, sends a searing hot electricity through him, filling him from crown to toe top-full of direst wrath.
(Danny was always the angrier one in the duo of Jason and Danny. He was always the one with glass in his mouth, cutting his teeth and tongue so that he could spit blood at the world around them. His knuckles had more blood and bruises on it than skin, once upon a time. All because he couldn’t keep his mouth shut. He has grown from it, that fury has turned to a small simmering candle.) (But sometimes, sometimes it rears its head, and electricity will buzz under Danny’s skin. There is lightning before the thunder, the second before a fist pulled to punch lands, the spark before it becomes a blaze.)
He stumbles over his words, and then sighs long and low, drooping his head. “I… was thinking that I can’t avoid this place forever.” He says, and the best lies always have the truth in it. Because it’s not a lie, not completely. But it’s not close enough to the truth either. “And that maybe if I came back, I’d be able to do something about those bad memories. Make them better or make it hurt less.”
Like wool over their eyes, it fools Sam and Tucker. Their narrowed eyes soften, and Danny feels like a snake is in his lungs as they both adopt their own versions of gentleness on their faces. “Oh, Danny.” Sam breathes out, and the snake squeezes, “Of course, we understand.”
Tucker nods, smiling at him. “Yeah, bro, that’s really brave of you. I know it can’t be easy coming back.” He says, “Maybe you can reconnect with the Waynes again, you always thought well of Mister Wayne whenever you came back from visiting.”
Danny smiles weakly, the gesture cutting into his cheeks like a knife. Perhaps he could. He was still upset with Bruce for hiding Jason’s killer from him. But he doesn’t hate him. Maybe five years ago, he did, when the death of Jason was still fresh in his mind and freshly bleeding in his heart. Now he just doesn’t know what to think of him. He was Batman. Jason was Robin, and the Joker killed Robin.
It would need to be something he’d have to speak to Bruce about in person, he thinks, in order to resolve it. To hear his judgment on it and make an opinion from there. Danny has learned in the last five years, much to Jazz’s smug delight, that talking to people about something he was upset about did make him feel better.
The conversation slips on from there into something more light, more breathable. And while they talk, Danny unpacks. He sets up his bed in the corner of the room, adjacent to the windows, and unpacks his cheap TV and table stand. It’s directly across from the couch, in front of the windows. He puts up knicks and knacks he’s collected over the years on the shelves.
When he puts up the curtains, he notices that more than one frame jiggles loosely. Sam makes a comment on the musty stains permanently dyed into the glass, and Danny talks about getting something to fix the cracks. Gotham winters can get brutal, and even if he can withstand the cold, doesn’t mean everything else in his apartment can.
“Oh, watch this.” He says halfway through unpacking, and pulls out a stick of thick white chalk from a box. “This is something I learned from Clockwork a while back; I think he knew I was going to move to Gotham.” He grins sillily, popping into the camera frame to show them. “I wonder how?”
Sam rolls her eyes, smiling while Tucker huffs. “It’s not like he’s the Master of Time and can see all past, present, and future.” Tucker snarks.
Danny hums lightly, curt like he isn’t sure he believes Tucker, and walks to a piece of bare wall not yet blocked by furniture. He starts to draw on it. The chalk shimmers with faint ectoplasm on the wall.
“Uhh…” Tucker’s voice cuts through, “Are you sure you should be doing that? Won’t you get in trouble for that?”
“There are bullet holes in the plaster, Tucker.” Danny retorts dryly, arching his hand to make a big circle. “I don’t think the landlord is gonna care if I get washable chalk on his walls.” Inside the circle, he inscribes the symbols of the Infinite Realms. “I don’t think he’d be able to see it anyways, he was really old.”
When he is done, Danny steps back to admire his work. It’s not bad, he thinks, for a lack of practice. He tosses the chalk off to the side, it lands on the couch and rolls back into the cushions. Ectoplasm heats under his hand, slowly glowing from his fingertips before stretching down the rest of his palm.
Danny’s fingers press against the wall, into the center of the circle. The result is immediate, ectoplasm is siphoned off his hand and into the circle. It glows, and then swirls. He steps off to the side for Sam and Tucker to watch its transformation. The circle fills with a swirling pool of ectoplasm, like a smaller version of the basement portal, and then it warps and stretches.
It fills out a rectangular shape, shifting like taffy being pulled this way and that, before settling into a solid shape. It solidifies, and instead of a wall there is a glowing purple door, warped in nature and seemingly shifting like a trick of the eyes. He can hear the gentle hum of the zone standing next to it, and can see the carving of the circle in the wood.
He gestures dramatically, grinning from ear to ear. “Ta-da~” He sings, “A door to my haunt! For whenever I feel like visiting it.” He pats the wood, making a strange thunk-thunk sound. “And then watch this.”
Danny touches the circle again, and the door twists and recedes like water going down a drain. The circle flashes bright green, and then fades into nothing on the wall, invisible to the naked eye. “I can hide it whenever I want! So if I ever invite someone over—” which he doubts, “—I won’t have to worry about them asking, ‘Hey Danny? Why is there a creepy fucking door in your studio apartment?’”
He gets a pair of laughs for his efforts, and Danny grins wider.
Sam and Tucker have to end the call when Danny is nearly done unpacking, leaving him alone with only his thoughts and the Gotham ambience outside. There were only a few boxes left, and they promise to call him tomorrow. He tells them that they better keep that promise.
The silence that follows after they leave feels somberly, as if the reality of moving in has finally set in and filled the air with its loneliness. With its change. Finally, Danny lets the strangeness of moving back to Gotham hit him when he reaches the last box, and he stops to take another smoke break to let it settle.
It feels so strange to be back in Gotham, he thinks. He’s all grown up, or almost grown up. He can vote and pay taxes, but he doesn’t feel much older than he was at fourteen. There’s a disconnect that makes him feel sad.
There are cars running outside, driving by. He can only catch glimpses of them, his apartment faces an alleyway. There are dogs barking in the distance, strays he bets. It’s already dark out, and he wonders if he looks out the window he would see the bat-signal shining through the night and staining the permanent cloud that hangs over Gotham.
Bruce would be so disappointed if he learned the reason for Danny’s return to Gotham. But Danny’s not here for him. He’s here for someone far more important. And like that, the simmering anger that has tucked itself into the furthest corners of his heart starts slipping through. His heart has teeth, ready to strike and snarl and bite.
He crushes the cigarette in his hand and throws it away. When he opens the last box, it is with hands that tremble and with a face of stone. With a delicateness he does not feel, he reaches in and pulls a corkboard from the box. On the corner frame is a small, near inconspicuous carving of another ghost rune.
Danny hangs it up on an empty space on the wall, out of sight from the window. It’s plain, and he has nothing to pin to it. He presses the small rune on the corner, pushing ectoplasm into it. Unlike the door, it does not twist and warp and shape itself into something new. Instead it bursts into green flame, eating away at the board and revealing the same thing underneath it, just in dark blue-black-purple.
Now this board, this board Danny has something to pin to it. The newspaper he bought earlier sits abandoned on the counter, and Danny unrolls it with something like viciousness in his chest. On the front page is an image of a damaged street, and above it is titled: “JOKER STRIKES AGAIN, 3 DEAD AND 27 INJURED”
Danny rips out the first page, he rips out every mention of him. His hands shake and threaten to crumple the paper as he turns back to the board, there is hot blood pounding in his ears. There is an impending sense of finally in his chest, like a setting sun giving the stage to a starless night. There is a stern set in his jaw, five years of festering rage rushing forth like a tidal wave, threatening to make his vision swim.
It would be so easy, he thinks, to go out as Phantom right now and hunt the clown down. It would only take a night. All it would take is a night, and then he could sink his hands into the Joker’s chest and rip out his heart where he stood. It would be so easy.
The thought alone forces Danny to stop as he is hit with another rush of fury, really making his head and vision swim. Thorny vines wrap around his throat, making it hard to breathe. He stares at a spot on the wall until the shaking passes.
If he wants to be discreet about this, then he can’t do it now. Even if he wants to. He doesn’t want witnesses. He doesn’t want an audience. He made a mistake, telling Red Hood about his plan. He wasn’t sure what he was thinking. Perhaps he wasn’t thinking at all. But he can only hope that the Hood hasn’t mentioned it to Bruce. He knows it hasn’t been long since they started working together. He hopes that the Hood has already forgotten about it.
He pins the newspaper clippings onto the black-blue-board, and stands back. It’s bare now, but it won’t be forever.
He presses the circle again, and the pinboard reverts back to its original blank state.
-----
Was I expecting to make a third part?? No. No I was not. I was also not expecting to make an entire google doc filled with summaries for short story ideas about this au that all tie into each other so that way if i DO continue this i have a skeleton pathway to follow rather than making everything up from scratch and potentially cornering myself
you can find this on ao3 or on tumblr 1 2 :)
#dp x dc#dpxdc#dp x dc crossover#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc crossover#childhood friends au#cw swearing#cw smoking#im calling them short stories bc if i call them chapters i might intimidate myself#fun fact every single chapter will have a crane wives lyric on it i am DETERMINED#i hope yall are subscribed to this on ao3 bc i almost didnt post this on tumblr#the fentons being good parents were a surprise to me too but also i never really planned on them being BAD parents#okay so they appear as negligent in the first post but we'll just call that a plothole#i had the idea that danny was the angrier one out of the duo earlier today and it felt like an epiphany#there's no guarantee of a next part but yk immm kinda hoping there is#on the docs the ending bullet point for this chapter was#'make it feel like a tv show where the seemingly inconspicuous and friendly character has something sinister up their sleeve'#WE know that danny's not inconspicuous in the least he's been thinking of this murder for the last five years. but nobody but red hood know#i had to come up with a in-story reason why danny doesnt kill the joker NOW but my out-of-story excuse is: there'd be no tension otherwise#its about the BUILD UP. Its about the RISING TENSION. Its about KNOWING that danny is planning to kill the Joker but you dont know WHEN#its about knowing that something is going to explode but never knowing when#i made the doc yesterday and spent my entire pluralism for educators class going thru the crane wives albums and looking up the lyrics and#matching them to the *checks doc* 18 short story prompts i have prepared#i am still missing one :((#its the tim and danny story and i have NOTHING PLANNED FOR THEM. i cant think of a thing for them to bond over :(( so i cant match a CW son#even DICK has a story and that was also a surprise#my favorite lines: He was always the one with glass in his mouth cutting his teeth and tongue so that he could spit blood at the world#aND danny slapping his door like a used car salesman and going 'now people wont ask why i have a creepy fucking door in my studio aptm :)'
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i just woke up so i haven't actually watched the pokemon direct thingy yet, but i heard they mentioned they aren't pushing out another console release at all for 2024 and if that's true then frankly THAT news is way more hype than any actual game announcement could ever be. go girl let us wait!! this is genuinely what i've been begging for for years now
like, oh a new Legends game? that's neat i guess. oh wait it's being given literally ANY time to cook and they aren't crunching Game Freak to hell and back in order to pump out a bunch of half-baked annual releases for the first time in ages?? NOW we're fuckin talking. LOVE to see the torturous cycle broken
#buny text#pokemon#granted they may have just delayed their plans simply because nintendo still isn't releasing a new console til pretty late in the year#and they cannot feasibly keep trying to squeeze things down into a format the switch can (barely) handle without losing goodwill#but i'd like to hope that this also proves they don't need to be pumping out 3 console titles and multiple DLCs in such short spans of time#i'd love to see what might happen if the pokemon devs were ever given the kind of long thorough dev cycles that the zelda team gets#like let gamefreak cook for as long as they need and release when they actually feel it's ready. please.#as frustrated as i am with how SV turned out the majority of my frustration was that you can still FEEL the devs' passion in there#but it's massively overshadowed by jank and lack of polish and design decisions that would only ever be made under intense time pressure#the last chunk of that game's story is cool as hell but getting there was such a depressing experience that it's very hard to recommend#these are clearly artists who still have good ideas and interesting experiences to create! give them the time they need to do it properly!
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Stitched lips
Content warning: slavery, implied sexual slavery (no actual discussion of any of it here but it is what it is), torture, body modifications, dehumanizing language.
Shout out to @whump-in-the-closet for giving me motivation to finally write this scene down with their wonderful prompt.
“…you can go fuck yourself! You, and your fucked up fantasies and your bitch of a wife, you can all go fuck yourself! Fucking monsters in a human skin, when I get out, I’ll make sure you survive for years until you fucking beg me to stop and then never listen, you pieces of fucking despicable shit!”
Ayzan panted, gasping for air after a tirade that was met with heavy silence and an even heavier gaze. It hurt — everything did — their jaw from being forced open with a gag most of the time, their throat from how each word felt like shards of glass across too dry and overused skin, their back and left arm where patterns of cuts and burns coiled around their skin, still fresh, crossed out by chaotic lashes made by a less caring hand, their knees from kneeling and joints from being forced to bend too far for far too long. It hurt, and had hurt for so long they could barely remember the before.
Emrose watched, face contorted in deep displeasure. He tilted his head when no more words came and Ayzan felt the belated panic rise up in their throat, chocking whatever they could add before they even attempted to speak.
The lord didn’t touch them. He only turned around and left, not sparing a single word of explanation or a threat, and it was so much worse. Ayzan thrashed in their binds the moment the door closed, testing the ropes to the new jolts of pain from where they dug in their skin, grating it red and raw. Nothing gave. They whimpered, overwhelmed by fear, helpless in the face of it. Whatever was going to happen, it was too much. They couldn’t go through that. They just wanted to go home — why had Kiris still not found them? Why, why, why, why?!
They heard the voices before the steps before the creak of the door. Feedali’s tilting phrases, sweet and light as they always were, urging the lord to think again. She begged him to reconsider. To not do to Ayzan whatever he was planning. They thrashed again even as it led to nothing but more pain.
“Please,” they begged the moment the couple came in. “Please, I didn’t mean it— I’m so sorry, I won’t speak like this again, please, I didn’t— I’m so— please don’t hurt me again, please please please—”
The lady spared a quick stroke down their cheek as the two passed them by, and Ayzan leaned into the touch. They hated it usually, hated the fake comfort she always gave before sliding a knife across their skin, how she always wiped their tears when the burning pain got too strong but never stopped no matter how they screamed and begged. They needed it now. Needed her to convince Emrose to change his mind. They felt like they were drowning, body fighting for breath so hard they chocked on the air.
“Dear, you see how scared it is. It really knows what it’s done wrong!” Feedali chirped, following the lord. “Perhaps something less permanent is a better idea? You can lash it as much as you’d like! You know how much I love when it sings for me.”
“I’m tired of it’s incessant talking,” Emrose cut her off. He brought a small table closer and placed something on it. Ayzan craned their neck, pleading words falling from their lips without ceasing. No use.
Something metal glistened in the lord’s hands as he pulled it out of the box. He put it at the table and took something else instead. “Open your mouth,” he threw an order. Ayzan immediately clenched their teeth. The ropes didn’t let them back away no matter how much they wanted and tried. “Open,” Emrose repeated. Ayzan shook their head, trying to catch Feedali’s eyes, to beg her silently to please please please please stop this. Emrose pinched their nose shut and painfully squeezed their jaw with another hand.
“Dear, you wouldn’t spoil all of my fun like this, would you?” Feedali hugged him from behind.
He shook her arms off, “Shut up, you too. It’s not like I’m stopping you from playing with it. It just needs to learn its lesson first.”
Ayzan saw her nose crinkle in disappointment at that as their lungs contracted in search of oxygen. They blinked back tears and clenched their jaw tighter even as Emrose’ fingers dug into the skin around it with bruising strength. Feedali stepped closer, brushing hair off of their forehead. “Come on then, pet. You’ve heard your master — you need to learn your lesson. It would only be easier for you if you relax. Come on.”
They didn’t. They held on, through the growing burning and the black spots before their eyes, through the pain and terror they refused to relax. They didn’t want a lesson. They didn’t want to know what was in store for them. They wanted it to end. Needed it to end. Gods, why couldn’t it already be over?! They couldn’t couldn’t couldn’t go on like this any longer!
It felt like they blacked out, and the moment their grip on their body faded just a bit, it acted against their will, gasping for breath. Fresh, tasty air finally flooded their chest, and immediately after they felt their jaw forced wide open something pushed inside their mouth, filling it and pressing their tongue down.
They couldn’t breathe again — they gagged, throat spasming to push the intrusion out, but there was no use as now their mouth was kept shut by the same unrelenting hand. Their lungs tried to suck in air again, and the fingers finally lifted from their nose. It only made the gagging worse. Half-delirious, they felt Feedali’s fingers on their cheek, caressing and tagging on something. They heard her voice, low and soothing, “Shhhh, you’re okay. You’re okay, just breathe, come on. Come on.”
Ayzan did, or at least tried their hardest, with slow and careful breaths, trying to force their body to relax. They felt fingers on their nose again and panicked, but Feedali only helped them blow it. They sobbed, grateful for her gentleness and overwhelmed by it. Tried opening their jaw, only to feel something hold it in place. Some sort of a strap? Was this it? Was it over?
The hope shuttered the moment Emrose stepped into their field of view. Ayzan saw the glistening of metal. They jerked back and whimpered and struggled and failed to speak. Feedali cooed at them. Emrose was not impressed.
They didn’t manage to see the instrument clearly before the lord was lifting their chin up and pressing something cold to their skin. Ayzan couldn’t get away — they couldn’t get away, couldn’t even beg them to. Tears streamed down their face and were brushed aside. They struggled to breathe through their nose.
The needle pierced through their lip with no warning.
Ayzan’s eyes flew open, Emrose tugged and demanded, “be still,” and they felt a string move through their flesh. The second wave of piercing pain came all too soon, as did the third.
“You’re not doing it evenly!” Feedali complained.
“Then do it yourself,” the lord snapped.
Ayzan barely processed the shifting before them, the pain and fear pulsating through their body. Their head was momentarily released and they desperately shook it, groaned and prayed to be understood. They’d learned their lesson. Please, they had, it was not necessary, please please please, why couldn’t they just let them go.
“Hold it for me, dear, won’t you?” Feedali asked and Emrose obliged. Ayzan stared at her as she smiled and turned the needle around before their eyes. “Hold still,” she addressed them sweetly. “We wouldn’t want to do it all over again if you thrashed around too much, would we?”
They didn’t want to do it even the first time. They hated it. They needed it to stop. Gods, please, why couldn’t it just stop.
Feedali cooed and smiled and talked comforting nonsense at them as the needle went through their lips mercilessly, up and down and then tug until it’s tight, and tug again to secure it with a knot. Up and down and tug, up and down and tug, and in the end they had no strength to even whimper, just crying in silence, body shaking with each puncture.
“Leave a gap for it to drink,” Emrose advised. Feedali agreed enthusiastically. She went to the very edge of their lips, tugged and tied it and Ayzan thought it was over. They hoped it was over, it had to be over, it had to.
The needle pierced them again, farther from the edge. “It’s a better pattern like this, isn’t it?” Feedali commented cheerfully. Emrose said something Ayzan couldn’t catch, but he also sounded satisfied. Ayzan cried and prayed for it to be over.
It went on slowly. It ended abruptly. They couldn’t remember half of it, and came to only when Feedali patted their cheek and praised them. They moved their mouth a bit and were met with a sharp pain. They cried.
“It must be thirsty,” the lady guessed. They didn’t catch the discussion that followed after. They heard laughter.
Something pressed to their lips — hurt, hurt, it hurt so much — past it, pushing them apart — hurt — just enough to squeeze through. “Open your teeth,” Feedali asked. Ayzan tried to. Their lips moved and it hurt. “Suck,” she encouraged them. They tried to — it was hard, with their mouth still filled so they couldn’t move their tongue even a bit. They gagged again, and they coughed when the water went down the wrong way. It hurt. They couldn’t even drink. They struggled to breathe. They hated it, hated it, hated hated hated hated it.
They barely felt the ropes around their limbs loosen and would have fallen over if not for someone’s arms lowering them down gently. “Look at it,” Ayzan heard Feedali coo above them. “So exhausted! I must admit, it was an ingenuous idea, dear. They’re so cute like this! And the gold looks so nice. I will definitely miss their voice, though.”
Ayzan’s hands were free. They moved one up, to their face, and felt thick blood caped around their chin. They moved further, to the lips. Ran a finger across them, pausing at each stitch and barely conscious of the pain that came with each movement.
Their lips were sewn shut. Barely a gap to press anything through anywhere but in one place, and even there barely a bigger straw could fit. They tried to force them open, and then tugged at the metal thread, scratched and tried to force the gag out, and wailed, and pulled so hard something tore, warm blood pouring in their mouth and down their chin both.
They felt their hands pried away from their face and tied together behind their back once more.
They curled up, crying helplessly, wretchedly, wishing only for this to be over. Clinging to the last bits of hope that it could be over, one day. That Kiris would find them. That they could survive until then. It had to end. It had to, had to, had to, had to. They needed it to end. It hurt so much.
A lash fell heavily, cutting across their back and their tied arms, and a few times more.
“Bring it to the dungeon until it remembers how to act,” Emrose demanded, voiced overflowing with disgust.
Ayzan felt something crack in them. They didn't resist being dragged away.
#that was the last time Ayzan spoke out of turn so you can be sure that they have learned their lesson!#the lesson lasted a whole year. so it was hard to not remember it!#and if you want to see them saved and genuinely comforted by none other than Kiris herself#you can wait for the planned story about them. that i will definitely write one day. because im so good at working on my wips and#not getting distracted by every new shiny idea ever. like the interactive whump im now going to write!#anyway#whump#whumpblr#whump prompt#whump writing#whump story#whumpee#defiant whumpee#(no longer so. hehe)#broken whumpee#whumper#multiple whumpers#intimate whumper#cruel whumper#pet whump#slavery whump#torture whump#injury whump#cw blood#cw torture
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maybe i didnt need to worry about anything, maybe i just had to make the comic
#quail talks#hi 🫶 i am just excited and feeling such euphoria rn#i just wrapped up one of the last pages in this opening scene and im so !!!!!!!!!!#i have about 20 pages ahead sketched and i'm slowly working through it between homework and general life drudge#its so wonderful..........i mean. i knew i always loved comics. this is technically my 4th#but this is my BIG ONE you know. the one i am Coloring. and its longer than 40 pages#the one i want to Periodically Release (i have no idea when i will be- i want to make sure i am far enough into it! backlog!!)#but i do plan on releasing it along the way of producing#i was so so so stressed out about Planning and Scripting and oh goddd is the story even GOOD enough.#hey. claire. (gripping her shoulders) you've been working on this story for 4 years. you have plenty planned and outlined i promise#and the story will continue to change!! im excited to be rangling this beast along the way#i just had to get started and im so glad i have#it might take my 4 more years to complete- but does a story ever finish truly?? its about the process......................................#and i dont need to worry about the story being Perfect- i am only 21. this is not the last story i will ever write lol#it just feels like a door in my brain has been opened that has always been supposed to be opened#i hope you guys like it as much as i do when i do release it :3
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Made a DN oc (Rae, it/its)!! Rae and L work together and here's a doodle of Rae styling L's hair! :3
( @nateriverswife @/ing you because you're kinda the reason I decided to draw them lol)
#Death Note#Original character art#Oc: Rae#My ocs#My art#Death Note fanart#L Lawliet#Oc#Original character#death note oc#Oc x canon#L Death Note#Rae isn't actually a new OC I made it last year but forgot about its existence until I read mazzaroth#Sadly not done reading it but I enjoy it so far!!! I really love Ethe!#I'd like to talk about Rae and L's story but I honestly have no idea how to explain it 😭#I'm pretty bad at plotting stories it's just very very very vague ideas + silly conversations and emotional scenes#Basically they're forced to work together but Rae hates L but a lot of stuff happens so now they're friends#I'm planning to change their story tho because this morning I had a bunch of new ideas for them#The original story was super super angsty but I don't want angst anymore I just want fluff now </3#Plus Rae's story and lore became a mess when I tried taking it out of the DN universe (I failed lol)#Its story really reallyyy needs an update
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finally put together a sheet for (some of) my ocs..... skjfahksjhfk
anyway please send me asks about them (and penny's work partner i don't have a design for yet) and i will try my best to answer 👍
#art i made#original character#oc#project: tie#i need to have some sort of. oc art tag huh#kids photos#penny vriesea#ash vriesea#lr. brightglass#the first image is a redraw of that one very iconic link click poster bc i am. tired#also wait. hand to god i came up with the design for penny before i started reading orv like its a genuine coincidence that her design is s#ok i couldnt decide between 'we have anna croft at home' and 'poor mans han sooyoung' but you get the idea#i think i still have some old sketches of her from last year but her design has gone through like 676543 revisions lmao#ash is new unfortunately i dont have that excuse for him SKJDFHKJSH#they are part of like. a larger story idea im planning out but like#contrary to what the post may imply the vrieseas are not the central characters. that's penny and her work partner#ash is just here because he occupies way too much space in my brain. also him being penny's clone makes him easier to design
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i think my brain should be studied i'm being fr
#surely this isn't normal#my dreams are like a portal to another life#sometimes i dream about the next day in advance#like with full details. and i often plan lessons in my sleep#sometimes i dream up entire stories with full fledged characters and backstories and intricate plot points etc#last night i dreamt up not just one but about ten such episodes#in the same night i also dreamt that i started taking T and had sex with a random girl and then had. a kinky adventure with dean winchester#(i love being ace about also this dream sex was pretty nice!)#i'm not gonna tell all the stories bc we would be here all day but#there were a Lot of different stories in my dream#full stories that all felt like they happened over the course of days or weeks or months or years in some cases#god i met so many different people in one night and they don't even exist#how i am expected to function properly when my head is so full of memories from lives i never lived but also kind of did#i feel like there's a hundred different universes in my memories and they're all from dreams but they all feel super real#like oh yeah remember that time i was part of a forest dwelling society that started gaining powers and we all thought they were#evil powers but it turns out the forest had given us the ability to communicate with it and to fly and to heal#or oh yeah i traveled the world once and then on my way back i had to cheat customs that wanted to charge me an exorbitant amount of money#for my luggage#by jumping down the luggage slide and travelling with the luggage#or oh yeah i was on T once and actually lost my T pills in a swamp but i dug around and ended up finding them#and i started to grow facial hair after like a week#like stoooop that's too many lives to live#every single night i go through another portal and live a whole ass life#rain.stuff#rain.dreams
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my favorite edits - 2023 edition 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9
#ts4#simblr#once again i don't know how to tag this so...#i'm just gonna use the same tags i used last year ig#2023 was apparently the year of the monster boyz#only 3 of these are not mb posts & i'm ok with that actually#ik i've said it a million times already but#i had soooo much fun doing mb stuff this year!#i'm really excited about all the stuff i have planned for the AU tbh#like. i have a list#i'm hoping................... to get the origin stories done at some point.#probably gonna do some writing here soon ish.#i've gotta make all of the side characters still & finish the character page so idk. i'll figure it out. i have a lot of ideas#i really wanna start sharing more about the story & the boys' actual personalities so that's probably what i'll focus on this next year#edit-wise i mean. like doing lore edits & stuff. idk#making cricket's was really fun so i think i'll like making stuff for everyone else too#i just have to not try to do a whole story bc then i'll lose interest. it'll be like the degenerates all over again lmao#idk why i just hate making story posts#lore posts are fine but story posts? mm no. not for me. idk how but they are different in my brain ok#n e way#i rambled. sorry. bye lol
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Inklings Challenge, abridged
Week 1: Grandiose plans
Week 2: Complete failure to write anywhere near as much of my story as I wanted to write
Week 3: Acknowledge reality and switch to a simpler story idea
Three days to deadline: Scribble out beginning scenes of story
Final day: Spend all day desperately writing to have something to show by the deadline
Day after deadline: Recover
#adventures in the inklings challenge#i'm on track this year!#though i am better off than usual#because i started with the simple idea#and held to it through grandiose plans to write more#and now at the end of week 2 i'm seeing a way to keep moving forward with this story#though for old times' sake i may just come up with a new story to dash out in the last three days#if i manage to write the main idea
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someone tell me why and how is it november already???? anyway i feel like i haven’t written in ages and jake’s bday is coming up,,, thinking rn if i should impulsively start a last minute long story for his bday again-
#i swear i’m getting deja vu from last year#this was literally exactly what happened#sksjsk#i’m pretty sure i started around beg of nov and last minute writing this whole thing#i think i even planned out how much i had to write each day 😭#i have an idea and i swear it’ll be better than last years 😭#tbh i started writing this story many months ago#but it’s been sitting at 1k words for who knows how long now 😭#idek if i’ll have time 😭#but it’s fun to have smth to work towards tbh 😭#hmmm WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK IDK#em speaks#happy jakey month btw 🥰🫶🏻
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I handpicked a classic lit recommendation for each of my seniors as a final parting gift/goodbye and it was so fun to tell them alsksjjeje
#this makes it sound so much more planned out than it was#when really it was me telling them of my plan and that I had failed to achieve it and then they were like no no no please tell us#so I did it in the last 15#I was like. wait HAVE I read 25 classics lol#(some of them were fairy tales or kids’ stories as applicable)#i based it off of their presentations and the Vibes and tbh I was good at it#I like to think#years of tumblr ask game training kicking into gear today
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SECOND TO LAST CHAPTER IS FINISHED. LETS GO GIRLS.
#its so weird. like theres one more chapter and then im like.... done w all my subnaut fics#like other than those other aus ive posted about but. tbh i never really intended to WRITE any of those#bc i would be here forever if i tried every single idea i came up with#but this is like the last big project i have planned for this fandom#and its. its weird!!!! ive been writing these fics for. what. four years?? five??#theres an end in sight and its like. huh.#NOT TO SAY IM GOING AWAY FOREVER OBVS. IM STILL GONNA BE HERE.#but no more 20k+ word stories until at LEAST sub3#sorry this has nothing to do w the fic at all EVERYONE ENJOY THIS CHAPTER IS A BIT OF A LONGER ONE TO MAKE UP FOR THE WAIT#final chapter will be out before the end of the week !!!!!#once again wtf r my tags#fanfic#fanfiction#subnautica: new years eve#subnautica spoilers
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