#I need to figure out how to make this stuff more concise

[cripplecharacters]

Do you have tangible advice on *how* to research different disabilities for writing? How to find specific blogs beyond searching the name of the disability on Tumblr, forums, websites with good info, etc? I see a lot of advice that is basically just "research the disability and talk to people who have it" but with how Google has gone down in quality, I'm not sure where to look beyond the surface level info (plus how to find people with the disability who are willing to share niche details/answer really specific situational questions). Thank you for everything you do on this blog!

Hey!

I'd say that you should break the research process into a few steps.

First, figure out what you should actually look into. Think about the genre, intended audience, and role of the character. A background character in a comedy meant for elementary school kids and a main character in an adult romantic novel will have two different approaches. You don't have to (and probably shouldn't) overdo a character that doesn't need it - otherwise it can end up feeling like some sort of disability awareness PSA, and that's probably not what you want.

With that in mind, you can start the actual research. I think that the websites of organizations/foundations for people with that specific disabilities are the best, since they cover a lot of things from many different angles. They are also usually written in simpler language than medical websites (which are also great, but I get that not everyone can understand those, not everyone's fluent in English, etc.) and have more tangible advice for "how to function with XYZ" essentially. It also can give you a glimpse of what your character could specifically struggle with, especially in case of a recent disability - medical pages often won't talk about insurance problems, interpersonal issues, or actually coping with the new state one's body is in. Check the FAQs, or the most commonly visited pages, stuff like that to get an idea on what's important. For example, these are some of the most concise explanations of how someone with a complete spinal cord injury at a specific level might function and what they might need. Something like this can be a good start to figure out where your characters "is", so to speak.

Some organizations for common disabilities might also have some sort of "media representation" page that's made specifically for writers. UK's Down Syndrome Association has one, Face Equality International has one, Phoenix Society has one, US Foundation for the Blind has one, etc.

This alone is more research than the vast majority of writers bother to do. If you actually understand:

what the disability is,

what symptoms it has,

how those affect your character in day-to-day life,

how to avoid the most common offensive stereotypes,

you are doing better than a lot of published writers, to be honest.

Okay, but what can you do to make it even better:

Since at this step you know what symptoms your character has and which ones you will actually show to the audience, you can start researching them one by one.

Here you might have to go read some medical studies, and learning how to get information out of those is a skill that needs some practice. But it is necessary to figure out if your blind character's vision loss is more likely to be total with no light perception or 20/200 (and, to figure out if your character's eye condition even causes blindness... because I've seen "blind characters" who are blind from eye conditions that... do not cause vision loss) so that you can actually research appropriate accommodations or aids.

Knowing specific symptoms will be even more helpful if your character's disability isn't very common - symptoms are very rarely tied to just a single disability, and you might have more luck researching a completely different one. For example, if you can't find info on something related to being a unilateral arm amputee, try searching for solutions that hemiplegics use. Not all will apply, but a lot of this stuff will be the same.

Make sure you understand what you do or don't do with those symptoms. There might be treatments, there might be some lifestyle changes to be done, there might be some strict limitation that you will have to put on your character for them to make sense. I think it's better to fit the character concept to the symptoms that you want and not the other way around - if you do the latter, you might find yourself writing an essentially abled character or a disabled character that is just inconsistent. Not every disability will be compatible with every role or concept, and there's really no point in trying to put us literally everywhere. If you really can't find a solution for something you need the character to do, it might mean that there just isn't one.

Once you figure out the technical stuff and have all the "dry" information laid out, start seeking the real life equivalents. Start widely at first so that you can narrow it down later, not the other way around (unless you don't mind changing the character around a lot). If you have already done a lot of technical research before, you will have more specific questions (which are easier to answer than "how do I write a disabled character").

Look up daily vlogs and day-in-a-life videos on youtube from people with that disability (and don't be afraid of only very-low views count videos popping up as that's almost inevitable - there are very few big disability youtubers, so try giving the smaller ones a chance). Watch interviews where people with that condition explain how their daily life is, how their disability affects it. SBSK is one of the best IMO. Check out AMAs on Reddit. Read personal blogs (you can generally find some by just putting "living with Name of Disability blog" into search). There's a ton of people who sincerely want to help others understand the realities of living with their disability and name their stuff accordingly so that it's easy to find.

At this stage you should have a decent idea of how the disability affects your character both in the technical sense, and in the more practical one.

Try to write out their average daily routine - from how they get up in the morning to when they go to sleep. Try to actively think "how would they do it" - how would they get from their bed and into their wheelchair, how would they dress up, how would they commute to work, how would they communicate with others, how would they get from point A to point B. If you realize that you're suddenly stuck, you now have a specific question ("how to put on pants with no hands", "how do totally blind people use computers", "shower accommodations C5 SCI", whatever) which is much easier to research than just a vague awareness of Not Knowing how your character functions in general. All of these questions have been asked before - newly disabled people will be going through them in their real life, and they use the same search engines and same social media as everyone else.

If you get this far, you're doing quite great! I'd say that this is enough effort to make a good and complex disabled character that's important in the story, though maybe not the POV character.

For a POV character, if you aren't disabled, you probably need a sensitivity reader/consultant.

There are a lot of those in writing spaces already - a lot of disabled people write themselves. If you just drop a "I need a sensitivity reader for XYZ" and use the general writing tags, there's a high chance you will get a response (assuming the XYZ in question isn't something very rare and/or so severe it would prevent someone from using the internet in general).

You can also try the disability's tag (don't get discouraged if it's not used a lot, a lot of people lurk without posting anything themselves) since you're looking for a real person and intending to pay them (very different from abled writers randomly posting their blorbos in disability tags).

Some of the places where you can try looking are r/SensitivityReaders, WritingDiversely, FireflyCreativeWriting, even sites like Fiverr could work. I've also heard some good things about Facebook writing groups, but I don't have any personal experience with them.

You can also always reach out to an association for people with the kind of disability you need - tell them that you are a writer and are looking to pay a sensitivity reader to help you, and they might be able to refer you to someone who would like to do that.

Another thing would be to keep intersectionality in mind - if your character is disabled, but otherwise part of the majority in every other sense (in NA or most of EU: white, rich, Christian, cisgender, straight, non-immigrant), you will have less things to consider than if your character has the same disability but is also a Polynesian transgender immigrant. If any intersectionality is particularly important to what you're writing, you should include that as well (you can also work with multiple sensitivity readers to try and get as close as possible).

My last advice is to only seek out sensitivity readers if you're able to pay them a fair amount for their work. Don't ask people to work for you for free (which is probably obvious, but a ton of fanfic and whump writers on Tumblr seem completely unaware of this).

Technical tips:

For specifically avoiding AI slop, I recommend putting [before:2023] after whatever question you put in, it will filter all results made after 2022, eliminating 99% of AI nonsense (works for images too).

If you're constantly getting a specific kind of wrong result, use [-ThingYouDon'tWant] after the input, it will remove everything that contains it.

If you're not getting a specific result, put the word you need in quotes ["Word You Need"] and it will force only the results who use that specific phrase/term to appear.

So if you're trying to find a blog about living with quadriplegic cerebral palsy as an adult and can't find any relevant searches by putting just that into the search, try ["cerebral palsy" "blog" quadriplegic -parents -spinal -SCI] and you should get more relevant stuff.

That's how I generally try to approach research for writing and I would say I've had good results (including now). Researching is a skill that requires practice unfortunately, at some point you can simply tell when a resource is bad or good since you've looked at so many already.

Follower input is welcome and encouraged :-)

mod Sasza

[bettystonewell]

TO YOU I BELONG: CHAPTER 3

Series Masterlist || Main Masterlist

Pairing: Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader

Summary: Dean isn't looking for a mate, and the last place he expects to meet his soulmate is while on a case. Fate ain't real. He still has free will, and saving you is just another part of the job. Except, monsters aren't the only things you need saving from... 18+ only MDNI

Chapter Word Count: 5k words

Chapter Warnings: canon typical violence, language, referenced physical abuse, referenced sexual assault, injuries to reader

A/N: The first two chapters I uploaded were partially rewritten from the original version I have elsewhere, but it’s not feasible for me to keep doing that, especially if I’m ever going to write new stuff; so from now on I’ll be uploading this story as is. Chapters 3 to 14 predate both, Another Notch On His Belt and Snickerdoodles & Special Sauce While I’d do some things differently, they’re all part of the journey. Enjoy! ✌️❤️

Previous Chapter || Next Chapter

“Dick?” Sam gave a half-assed chuckle.

Dean’s eyes lit up mischievously. “Her mate.”

Oh, the mother fucking irony. He wasn’t just a dick, his name was Dick. Or Richard, to be more concise. Dean had passed over that insignificant detail and Ritchie, as you’d called him, to go with what he found to be the most fitting of the three.

While Ritchie suggested a plain loser, Richard sounded like a pompous jackass, which Dean figured didn’t fall far from the tree. But Dick? Dick narrated a scumbag he could work with.

He remembered Dick Roman and his crass grin all too well, and with his face in mind, Dean had run through all the satisfying things he wanted to do to your mate since the moment he’d found you in the park. Whatever manifested, or not, was for later Dean’s enjoyment, but everything his genius had concocted so far suited Dick to a tee.

Sammy, however, saw the bigger picture.

A tsk left his mouth. Followed by an eye roll and the shaking of his mop-hair through a downward glance. It was a wonder he could do both at the same time. “Don’t you think you should be worrying about her, not her ex?”

Dean’s head flicked over his shoulder to the door on the other side of the car park, where he presumed you were still fast asleep. The heel of his left boot even shifted backwards a fraction. All he had to do was fling his other leg towards the room, and your scent and stimulating curves would soon surround him again.

Was it possible for a heart to skip a beat? Because that action, with that very organ popping out of someone like Scooby Doo’s chest, sure described the way Dean felt at the mention of Dick’s finality in your life.

“I’m really getting soft,” he muttered.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Dean ran his fingers through his hair. “She’s still sleeping. With any luck, I’ll be back before she wakes up.”

“Dean.”

“Don’t Dean me.”

Sam could argue, meddle, and question all he wanted. Dean wouldn’t sway from his plans, no matter how stupid his method was. “I ain’t letting him get away with it.”

“I’m not saying you should. Just take a minute to calm down and focus on her, not him.”

“What part of he raped her, don’t you understand?” He sighed and drew his thumb and forefinger across his eyes. His voice, while not the loudest he’d ever produced, had been enough to make even Dean anxious.

He cared little about anyone else in the vicinity, but as with every other motel they frequented, the walls were paper thin, and the door you were behind was a mere thirty yards away. Yes. His guilt fueled conscience had him going stir crazy.

Him needing to be long gone before you woke up wasn’t for your benefit. It was for his own sanity. Sam’s too.

“I understand you want revenge. But she still went back to him yesterday.”

“Because I let—”

“You didn’t do anything!” Sam snapped, then shook his head. “They’re bonded. Chances are she loves him. That won’t change overnight.”

“I know that.” Of course he did. Dean wasn’t that unattuned with the world around him, as people always suggested. He got social cues and had feelings like any other guy. He simply chose not to wear his deepest ones on his sleeve out of survival.

Everyone else could still suck it. Sam could too.

“So why are you so set on doing this right now? Do you really wanna risk pushing her away by beating up the alpha she cares about?”

“It ain’t about him or me.”

“Yeah.” Sam scoffed. “Like I said, revenge.”

“No. Alright? Just, no.” Dean’s arm swooped through the air, as if shoving Sam’s statement off an imaginary table.

This wasn’t about Dean seeking retribution, although he’d never deny there wasn’t a small piece of him that found the concept enticing.

Okay, a large slice.

He had to find some fun in his shitty existence, especially after being careful for so long.

Ever since Sam had lost Jess, they both had been. Aware there were plenty of other fuckers out there besides the likes of yellow eyes. Crowley, for starters, even Cas and the other angels, Roman, the Steins, Chuck. And not wanting to risk history repeating itself, they turned to suppressants.

Though it took a single instance of him going feral and a stern warning from Bobby and his own shotgun pointed at his extremities, for Dean to see sense and allow his rut to occur once a year.

“One cycle with one of them fake dolls ain’t gonna kill ya, idjit,” he had said. And while that was a fond memory of Dean’s now, it had scared the crap out of him.

So, “If I let him walk, she’s a target. With my claim or not,” he said.

Sam should’ve known that, but his eyes grew wide and a grin made them lift even higher. “Are you going to?”

“I just met her!” And that was still the scariest thing in all this.

He and you were soulmates. Fated to be. Chosen for each other by who even knew? Someone who didn’t know you and expected you both to do what? Commit to each other at the drop of a hat?

Dean couldn’t bring himself to think, let alone say the L word. He’d avoided it on purpose when Sam had mentioned you loving Dick, and that was plain dumb. It was four fucking letters. He wasn’t a child, though he had done some crazy, adultly stigmatised shit on your behalf.

Taking you back to the motel as he had and cleaning your wounds. Sleeping close by and letting you take his jacket to nest with. Ordinarily, these things were tame, but law enforcement would say otherwise if Dick decided to press charges against him even before he did what he planned to do.

It was way too much, not because of the illicit nature, but because it was too soon. Too easy to fall. Too easy to be trapped into something more, and yet, he’d been thriving on every second of it so far.

As usual, Sam knew it, too.

“You’re thinking about it,” he said. “You should ask her to come with us.”

But he didn’t respond with how Sam wanted him to. “Keep an eye on her, would ya?” He patted him on the shoulder, once to steady himself, the second to reassure. “Call me if anything happens.” And with that, he strode ‘round to Baby’s driver’s side and got in. It was now or never.

When he reached your street, Dean parked Baby around the corner. Close enough for a quick exit, but further away from your building to avoid arousing suspicions. Not that there was anyone around to question him or his motives.

Just as it had been during the night, the neighbourhood was quiet and restful. Still early enough on a Sunday for most people to be in bed.

Not him, of course. But regular people. Civilians.

Someone like you, included in his picture of suburbia and the apple pie life he’d always admired from a safe distance. It was a shame that the bubble had burst when he found you in the park.

It looked different in the daylight hours as he moved towards the entrance. All that he’d witnessed tainted the luscious leaves, turning the hues dim. It didn’t help that the clouds overhead were already bleak with grey.

They made the white rendered walls of your apartment block appear worse than his original critique of the place. Even though this was your home, it was a home you shared with Dick. A place Dean would find no comfort in.

He entered the building and made quick work of the steps, bounding up them two at a time, guided by his nose. And the letterbox he’d read at the bottom that had your surname on it.

As he honed in on your front door, his ears perked for any movement besides his own, but all was clear, and he was able to thump on the wood without interruption.

Once.

Twice.

But by the third time, his patience had worn thin, and he resorted to his usual methods.

He wrapped his fingers around the ivory grip of his 1911 and drew it out of his waistband, cocking it in readiness. The cool metal, the perfect fit as always, satisfied his hand and the hunter within.

Was the gun overkill? Eh. That was up to interpretation. Just as he still knew little about you, he knew less about Dick, besides the name and what he had done. The weapon was a precaution. A scare tactic at best.

And with that in mind, the sole of his boot raised and collided with the door of the small apartment, sounding a loud crunch as the wood gave way. It made his bow leg twang from the force, but damn, was the rush of adrenaline worth it.

Fuck! He was pumped.

Ready for a fight or a match of words, though the former was far more enticing. Revenge would be sweet, no matter what Sam said. Which was such a shame because his grand entrance hadn’t paid off.

Dick was nowhere in sight, and Dean begrudgingly returned his firearm to its usual resting place. The fucker must’ve been out looking for you.

As Dean stepped over the threshold and past the now broken door, your familiar scent hit his nostrils. That, and the musk he’d caught in your hair. It was the smell you’d find labelled pine or forest in a gas station’s air freshener selection. Pungent, overpowering and something he’d never allow Baby to be exposed to, let alone his own skin, anymore.

Of course, anything that belonged to Dick was repulsive. The recliner Dean stared at had to be his. What with the high back, built-in cup holders that were the perfect size for a cold one or a Dean-sized arm holding a scotch, and a remote in the other hand.

The chair would be awesome in the bunker. Maybe he could… no. No, no. He’d get himself a new one. Along with the flat screen, comfortable-looking three-seater sofa, and the fluffy blanket that had to be yours.

His feet carried him over to the item and brought it to his nose. It was yours alright. The touch of cinnamon he’d savoured during the night had soaked into the colourful fibres and worn thread, and he could just picture you curled under it, cosy and warm. You would look even better with the one he’d buy you, on his bed, nesting, with his pup safe inside your belly.

God, he was being delusional. Conceited too. You nesting on his bed? His pup? The second you discovered the true extent of his meaningless existence, you would change whatever mind you had about him. As you should.

This window into your personality he wandered through reminded him of what he knew, though, and your world was far different from his. Soulmate or no, it would be selfish of him to ask you to give this lifestyle up to be in his where monsters and gore were a constant.

As for pups. Little versions of him mixed with you? The idea took over his body with warm fuzzies, but it was a pipe dream fueled by his instinct to mate and breed.

He knew that.

‘What the hell, man? You don’t even want a family.’ Not like that, anyway.

Fuck no. He’d already dipped his toe in that pool and found it too cold. Being a dad wasn’t for him. Not with the target on his back. And this infinite loop of yearning, then backtracking? It certainly wasn’t, either.

Was this what they meant by a mid-life crisis?

Or maybe it was Dick’s pheromones making him go awol? With notes that belonged in a can of axe body spray Dean had used as a teen before he presented.

His snort was comical.

At least he could put whatever this was to good use. That and the rest of his self worth and a smidgen of hate. They were the perfect recipe for a strong uppercut and Dean was lucky Dick didn’t keep him waiting long.

The unmistakable jangle of keys looking for their lock was the first thing that alerted Dean to his presence.

“Who’re you?” was the second.

Dean spun around on his heels, oozing confidence with his cocksure grin. He didn’t feel the slightest bit intimidated as Dick puffed his chest out. Nor when his gaze travelled the length of his body, top to toe. And rather than answering the other alpha before him, he thought it best to show him how badly he’d fucked up.

Dean’s language was action, after all, and he was finally about to have some fun.

His right hand moved to hover behind his back as the other’s fingers locked around the edging of his shirt collar, pulling it down in slow motion for added effect. He was an expert in gaining attention, even if it was purposeful to piss someone off.

The haughty laugh Dick produced was better than any reaction he could’ve hoped for, and it urged him on.

“Somethin’ funny?” Dean said.

“Guess I was looking in the wrong places. She swore you didn’t want her.” Dick stepped forward, slinking further into the room, unaware of what Dean could achieve.

Mistake number one.

On the outside, Dean was relaxed, too. Both arms returned to his side, keeping his distance with his front positioned towards the other alpha.

Inside, Dick’s every movement was under his scrutiny. He wanted him to fuck up. To say or do something stupid. That way, Dean had probable cause. It would make whatever he ended up dishing out sit better on his conscience if he heard Dick admit it himself.

So Dean poked the bear. Outright asking him, “Did she say that while you were raping her?”

“I marked her as mine.”

Those words were Dick’s second mistake. He’d just given Dean the chopping block.

“And I suppose she didn’t ask you to stop when you hit her, huh? When you tried to scratch my initials out of her skin?” Dean’s voice remained void of all emotion, even as the anger bubbled in his gut. If he held a mirror to his soul, Dick’s face would have been its reflection.

“The little slut is obviously yours now. What do you want?”

Other than using your name, there was nothing Dick could’ve called you that wouldn’t have resulted in him handing over the axe and a third strike.

“I came here to give you a taste of your own medicine. But I don’t swing that way,” Dean said as he withdrew his gun and held it in the air. “Then I thought I’d use this.”

Dick’s whole body flinched. A Mexican wave of nerves twitching all over if you had watched closely, as Dean, of course, had. “You’re fucking crazy!”

Dean was still casual, his smirk devilish. “Oh buddy, you’ve got no idea. If we’d have met last night, well, let’s just say you wouldn’t be here.”

It was all talk. Dean would never go that extreme, not now that he’d had some time to think. He’d meant that bit about being calm. But he loved watching Dick squirm.

His face was hilarious. Dick’s not Dean’s. Dean looked down for business, whereas Dick may as well have been down on his knees. “You want me to apologise? Never see her again? Done. She’s all yours.”

“You think I was waiting for your permission or something? Nah. But I’d appreciate it if you come at me first.”

“Why?” Dick scowled.

“So I can claim self defence.”

To Dean’s exhilarated surprise, his jaunts worked and Dick lunged forward, colliding his fist into his cheek. The muscle below throbbed, and the broken skin stung, but the blood that swirled through his mouth was worth it.

Dick was too dumb to realise Dean was playing with him.

He took blow after blow, waiting for the moment Dick wore himself down to absolute exhaustion.

A punch to the gut. Another to his ribs. With each new strike, more of Dean’s stock appeared on the other alpha’s knuckles. If it weren’t for the colour, he may have confused the patterns and added chunky bits with strawberry jelly, seeds and all, smeared over his pasty white skin.

“Is this what you did to her?” Dean taunted. As much as the truth would anger him, he wanted to know. The more he heard, the easier beating Dick to a pulp would be.

But Dick was too busy concentrating on his workout. Huffing and puffing, with zero energy to answer, or blow the house down.

“That all you got?” Dean made him work a little harder. He’d started dodging, adding some defensive blocks amongst the steps he took backwards. His goal, further from the door, knowing full well that by bringing Dick into a different room, there would be no chance of any witnesses.

It proved more difficult, what with his centre of gravity slightly off because of the punch he’d allowed Dick to land on his right ear. But now in the kitchen, with counters he could lean and bounce off of, Dean decided it was time. His defence turned into offence, and in a matter of seconds, his fist had shaped its way into Dick’s face twice, the butt of his gun another, satisfying every part of his being.

Dean delivered more, all to the fleshiest parts of Dick. His stomach, his thighs, colliding with both boots, and his namesake, which met Dean’s very forceful left knee.

Both men winced. Both groaned, too. Only Dick was in pain, Dean out of mock sympathy.

His hand grabbed the back of Dick’s shirt next, lifting his body upright to send him flying, much like his front door. He landed head first into the lower cabinet with a thump and a flop onto the floor, where he received more of Dean’s wrath.

Looming over your mate, he used his boot to roll him to the side, further toeing his chin to make sure he had the bloodied face’s attention. “Being someone’s bitch ain’t so fun, huh, Dick?”

“Who wants breakfast?” Dean did his best to act casual and ignore the two pairs of eyes that followed him as he walked back into the room. His body ached all over.

He’d been gone a little under three hours now, but he knew that wasn’t what either of you had an issue with.

His brother’s gaze forever judged, while yours appeared concerned, possibly frightened, and neither surprised him, having received similar stares from strangers the entire way back to the motel. A swollen face and bloody knuckles just did that to people, and Dean accepted it.

“What happened?” Sam asked from behind his laptop. Though it should’ve been obvious “I thought—“

“Nothin’.” Dean wasn’t gonna talk about his confrontation with Dick. Not anytime soon, least of all when you were in the room. He needed to gauge your feelings on the matter first, then he’d play into them.

Would you be upset he’d beaten the guy into a pulp or were you concerned with his injuries at all? Because while the latter sure sounded appealing, it wouldn’t help his latest penchant towards you.

He moved to the table and unburdened his hands of everything he carried, starting one by one with the two trays of drinks he’d been balancing. “We got, ah, black, milk, mocha, red-eye, iced, breakfast tea? With, huh, milk? Hot chocolate, and,” he lifted a steaming cup to his chin and inspected the scrawl written on the lid, “the lady said this had Thai in it? I dunno. It’s popular with the locals.”

Impressed, Sam stood up and reached over to pick out a coffee Dean had labelled, only to be smacked away by an overtly aggressive hand.

“Ladies first.” Dean shot you a glance.

You were sitting on the bed he’d left you sleeping on, but had since been remade. As had his Sam’s, with his jacket folded at the end. “I also bought some sandwiches, donuts. Pie.” Both brows raised on that last part, and his grin, although stained with blood, was rather proud.

He had no idea what you liked, but he was confident you would find something to your tastes among this lot. He may have been intent on pushing you away, but he could still protect and act chivalrous towards his soulmate.

If you decided you wanted nothing, it wouldn’t go to waste because he was salivating over the aroma alone since he’d picked it all out. He could always have another coffee, too.

While he didn’t hesitate to pull up a chair and slump into it, he did second guess himself when he addressed you. “C’mon Omega. You must be hungry.”

The term slipped off his tongue with ease, and one thing he was suddenly certain about was his sack being empty. He’d dropped his balls somewhere between dealing with Dick and now, and this uncertainty and stilted behaviour needed to stop.

Even after seeing your apartment, being surrounded by your things and having his inadequacies resurface again. He wasn’t what you needed in your life, and he had to remind himself of that, though it drove him crazy.

This constant mystification around you would surely end with your reflection in Baby’s rearview once more, wouldn’t it?

Yes. It had to because he was Dean frigging Winchester. Never confused by anyone, male or female.

But you and your hesitant steps, observing him as you made your way to join them, were an enigma. Beautiful even with your still stiff gait and bruising on your face and neck that had darkened again. The two of you could almost be a matching pair. Dick sure favoured a hook.

“What’ll you have?” he asked as you sat down, eyes focused in and around his.

The plastic against your pelvis must’ve been uncomfortable. Dean paid particular attention to the way your expression tightened, then relaxed as your body did.

“Coffee? Tea?” He ignored his anguish, pointing to each cup as he listed them, waiting for your response, then passing you your selection when you did.

Your grip was gentle. Your bites and movements were just as soft as how you held your drink when you ate, and through Dean’s constant glimpsing, he found himself less and less interested in his own food.

“You sleep alright?” he said, and your lip twitched into a soft smile when you nodded. Your continued stare had him pulling at his collar.

Sam watched the entire exchange with interest. Here was Dean, someone so hellbent on never entering another relationship after whatever it was he’d had with Lisa and Ben, now infatuated with you. Sure you were soulmates, but it was simple and refreshing.

He saw the way Dean grappled with his instincts, trying to pretend you were no one special, even though all these sweet gestures showed otherwise. The food, the coffee, the bag he’d packed with as many things of yours as he could after leaving your apartment.

You may not have realised what the duffle below your feet was just yet, but Sam sure did. The scent of your belongings oozed off of it, blending with his brother’s own.

Cinnamon, apple, a touch of vanilla, and other spices that collected under those which Dean surrounded himself with. It fit that his palate, in its purest form, would work so well with that of his soulmates.

Almost the same as Sam and Jess’ own mix…

Sam understood Dean’s reluctance, not just with you, but with everyone. He appreciated that his own misery had shielded Dean from heartbreak so far. He wished the transformation he saw in his brother would open himself up more to find what he had lost.

Until then, though, Dean was going to receive a world of shit when they were alone again. Sam owed him for the morning’s wake up call. No doubt for other instances he still didn’t know about, too.

The clothes Dean had picked for you from your wardrobe before leaving the apartment, while fitting as they should, left him disappointed. As crazy as he knew the notion was, he enjoyed seeing you wearing his things, even though temporarily. There was something about the way his shirt flowed over your breasts and hips.

It had engulfed your figure. How it hung below your rear, revealing your thighs when you stretched, and the edging of what he presumed to be a cute pair of lacy panties hugging the curve of that sweet ass he’d pictured as he took care of himself.

Yup. He was going to hell. Again.

He’d been over this and it couldn’t happen.

‘She was just fucking assaulted, man,’ his brain rerouted. ‘Not even a day ago. She doesn’t need this shit from anyone, least of all her soulmate. Or her alpha.’

There it was, that primal side of him coming out. It had been there at your apartment too, but it, like the more sane part of him, was more interested in screwing with Dick at the time.

Now that it was all over, he needed to do his utmost best to reel it in. There was still one last thing that had to be addressed, and neither lusting nor pussyfooting around was going to get it done.

He had to cut ties with you. He had to. His life wasn’t for you, not after seeing the life you could have, with or without Dick. So as he helped you clean up from breakfast, sorting out scraps from leftovers and recycling from trash, he decided there was no time like the present. The sooner the better.

Dammit. He had to do this, now, and he listened to make sure the shower was still on and Sam, in it. Then, running his fingers over his hair, flinging each bristle forward, he cleared his throat.

“So, now that our case is over, me and Sammy will head home to Kansas.” He was smooth. In control, and confident in his delivery. It showed a little too well.

“Right,” you whispered. Your head, delaying by a second, gave a quick shake.

Was that pulling your teeth over your lip nerves? Disappointment?

Scrap that part about confidence. There was that powerful beat in his heart again. The one that felt like it had escaped his chest, pumping back and forth for the world to see.

“I ah. The good news is he won’t bother you anymore.”

Your body froze on the spot. “You—”

There was no need for you to say anything further because he could tell by your horrified expression alone you thought the worst.

“No. No, no. I mean, he looks worse than I do.” He chuckled awkwardly. “But I didn’t murder the guy. As much as I wanted to.”

He shouldn’t have said that.

“I might’ve hustled him a little first, but he’s gonna recover. Just like you will.” He paused and raised himself, pulling his muscles taut. He’d forgotten all about the medicated cream he’d bought you.

His hands touched his hips, then his thighs, searching his pockets, though he didn’t know why. The tube, still in its box, wouldn’t fit anywhere on his person.

He scanned the table and the ground below it before reaching down to pick up the small paper bag. “I got ya this at the pharmacy near the diner. They said it’d help with the infection. Might have to borrow some myself before we leave.” He grinned.

But you didn’t return it. Your brow furrowed as he stepped closer to hand it to you, fingers playing with the package the second they touched. “What’re you trying to say, Dean?” you said, and damn. Using his name stung.

You really were intuitive. He should’ve bargained for it. And what choice did he have but to rip the bandaid off? “Look. What I said about wanting you was true. But my life is dangerous, and I can’t bring anyone into it. Especially you.”

Though his words were every bit rejecting, the way your chest rose below the outline of his chin and your lashes batting against your cheek had him taken, and his concentration proved difficult to maintain.

There was a touch of spice in the air that hadn’t been there before. Something familiar, yet he couldn’t quite put his finger on where it came from. It was addicting, and while he knew it was wrong to let it engulf his senses, he didn’t stop himself.

“So,” he shuddered, using the slight tremor as a final plight to clear his head, “if there’s some place you can go, family or friends, I’m happy to take you there. Anywhere at all. I think it’s best you do that, and you know, forget about Ritchie, and—“

“And you.” Your lips were so plump and enticing. His eyes could only focus’s on their shine, moving under the light as you spoke.

“Yeah,” he whispered, his stomach pulling a one-eighty.

“Are you sure that’s what you want?”

Nope. But what could he do? Your safety was far more important than his need to have you around. His life wasn’t for you. Hell, it wasn’t a life for anyone, and when he stuttered and your mouth pursed in an understanding smile, he was further reminded that what he was doing was right.

“It’s okay. I understand,” you said as your hand came up to touch his and your face lifted to graze a simple peck on the other.

The softness he felt against his skin covered his body in a blanket of goosebumps, igniting a fire within that made his blood thrum, and his ears pop and pulse along with his gut, churning once again. And before you could retract, before you could step away or even turn, his arm had wrapped around your waist, tight, and he commandeered a kiss of his own.

Was he stupid? Damn straight he was, but the genius that lay dormant would pull him through. His inner alpha would always be there to protect his omega. He just needed to figure out how.

Previous Chapter || Next Chapter

How awesome was that gif at the top? Gave me goosebumps when I was going back and forth, formatting.

I wish I could say that’s the last we’ll see of Dick, but unfortunately, memories live on, and we’ll delve into them more in the future. Did Dean beat him up enough, though? I’ve killed some characters off in the past, not going to lie, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it with him.

We have a cyclone causing trouble here - yay - and my kids are already driving me insane. If you don’t hear from me, it’s because I’ve either lost power/internet, or I’m huddled in the foetal position of my living room, with my wine stash, gone… That’s far more likely. Enjoy your weekend wherever you are in the world!

Chapter 4: Familiarising - 14/03

Dean rolled off to the side, bringing you with him to rest your head against his chest instead. He pulled the covers with you to drape them across your shoulder. Close and cosy, but away from his clear arousal, choosing it best to leave the pressure in his pants over putting it on you.

“I, ah, just need a sec,” he breathed through the grin plastered over his face.

If only you’d give him one.

Your hand patted his sternum, but your leg wrapped over his, bringing your knee close to his semi.

“Not that I’m complaining, sweetheart, but you’re making it hard for me here.”

“Pun intended?” You asked, earning yourself a light smack on your rear.

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[inkie-does-whump]

Screw it, Imma talk about the body horror instead of finishing the Ranchers fic (this is gonna have several parts, cuz I have a lot to say, so keep an eye out for more!)

Trigger warning for mild body horror. Duh.

It starts with Jimmy, the guy with the perpetually broken body. It's inconvenient for Jimmy to be out of commission for so long (people wanna hit the Canary, who can blame them? He has a very punchable face) So the Watchers start trying to figure out how to heal him faster. They don't like to heal him with magic, cuz it's really draining, they prefer for subjects to heal naturally (maybe with some assistance from medicine/technology)

The solution they came up with is false bodies. The Watchers could use dark magic to move Jimmy's conciseness into life-sized dolls that could be easily replaced or repaired (the reason the Watchers prefer this over healing is cuz this is more like necromancy type stuff, which they're good at. They suck at healing magic. Dump stat)

Anyways, they didn't tell Jimmy they were doing this. All he knew was that his routine "check ups" to the medical center were getting longer and more frequent. They would check his wounds, test for things like his reflexes and nerve damage, and then he would be hooked up to a machine with a bunch of wires while the Watchers monitored and took notes. It took a while for them to figure out how to get the magic right, but eventually (during the E2 SMP) they succeeded in transferring him into a doll.

The first one was plush, but they eventually backtracked and made later ones from plastic, cuz the plush was super easy to break and cracks in the plastic could be fixed by melting it back together with a heat gun.

Jimmy was, rightfully, horrified with the body he found himself in. He had a panic attack in the medical center, and the Watchers dragged his new body to his room so he could calm down in his panic box. He didn't leave for several days.

Which was fine. Plush doesn't need food or sleep. Even his strained breath is unnecessary.

This did lead to the Watcher's first problem though. Jimmy could no longer be controlled through tranquilizer, which was one of the main ways the Watchers managed to get him through transportation without screaming and thrashing. Drugs were useless, meaning the Watchers had significantly less control over him. They began studies on transferring into organic bodies instead of plastic or plush (I'll expand on this more in a post about Amnesia Colds)

Jimmy's brain does a bad job at coping with its new home. Stress makes his seams break. A glimpse of glass eyes or red circles on his cheeks sends him into a full blown break-down. Breathing his hard with all the cotton in his lungs. He finds himself coughing it up at late hours of the evening, heaving for air he doesn't need.

He's been crying more than normal, and it's getting on people's nerves. The subjects in the lab (Empires2 SMP) are finding it hard to sleep through it. It makes Joel's manic episodes worse, and eventually Jimmy is thrown to the wall like the ragdoll he is, and has the voicebox torn from his throat.

Fwhip is the Watcher's Assistant in this lab (aka, an admin. For more information, check out my post on Xisuma) and he finds Jimmy limp on the floor of the practice room, cotton pouring from the tear in his neck, glassy eyes unfocused. He tries the best he can to stitch Jimmy back up with the supplies in the practice room, and eventually Jimmy comes back to reality.

He wants to cry, but no sound escapes him.

Jimmy turns to Fwhip desperately, panic setting in. Fwhip doesn't know how to help, so he helps Jimmy back to his room and urges him to rest. Instead of getting in bed, Jimmy sits in his panic box quietly.

Eventually the Watchers have to restore his body, but Jimmy is stuck with no voice for weeks. The Watchers prefer it, but a few renters complained that he never screamed when they hit him anymore, so his voicebox was restored quickly after that.

(Sometimes Joel sits in his room, pulling the string of the voice box and listening to his brother-in-law's voice play, dead and monotone.)

Body horror part two link :3

[thewardenisonthecase]

About the Lucanis Romance

(this is a long ass post ok so bear with me)

So I've been meaning to adress some of the complaints/criticisms of Lucanis's romance and I was thinking on how to do it and I finally figured it out. While I don't like making comparisons because I think they're somewhat unfair, but this time, I'm gonna do it to show why I have some many complaints about the Lucanis romance.

And I'm gonna compare it to Fenris's romance arc in DA2. The main reason for that is that 1) they're both very troubled man who brood and went through A Lot tm and 2) considering DA2 also doesn't allow you to just talk to the companions whenever and doesn't have a spam kiss button and is a shorter game, it feels the fairest comparison.

'Lack of reactivity when it comes to the flirting dialogue options'

One of the biggest complaints when it comes to Lucanis romance is his lack of reaction to the flirting dialogue lines. I've seen the argument that 'oh but he's awakward, he doesn't know how to react'. I'm not the biggest fan of this because there are ways to better portray a character being bad with flirting than having 0 reaction.

During Switch and Bait, the quest where Fenris is recruited, you can flirt with him. And how does he react? He gives a nervous laugh, because he's not used to do. But that conveys that he listened to the flirt line and is responding to it, even if he doesn't actually say anything. There are other moments where his reaction is looking away, smirking, and a few times he does flirt back.

Even if small, I never felt that Fenris wasn't reacting to what was being said. Meanwhile, Lucanis has a painful moment where Rook tells him "I'm here" and he, with the straightest face ever, responds with "We need to talk about Ilario". And this is not the only time where it feels like there was no response to the flirting, its just the most egregious of them.

So, while I can understand what people mean by the fact that he's awkward, there are better ways to portray this. It's important to remember that this is a video game, which is an interactive media, and on top of that, it's an RPG. The player HAS to feel like what they're doing matters, because if it doesn't, it's easiert to just read a book.

'Not enough romance scenes'

I think this is a criticism that has been misunderstood by many people. Romance scenes do not mean just sex. I'm asexual, the sex scenes are the thing that least matter to me. Like, Fenris only has 1 sex scenes and it's a fade to black where he immediatly dumps Hawke after, so clearly, sex is not what I care about.

What does matter are scenes that establish a connection between the two character.

And while Lucanis has them, and I think they're great (the coffee scene and the almost kiss one are the highlights for me), due to the way these scenes are spread out, it feels like there's something missing.

DA2 also doesn't have a shitton of romance scenes, and considering the fact that Fenris breaks up with Hawke halfway through, its understandable. But the difference is that DA2 is a much shorter game than Veilguard, or, at the very least, Act 2 of DA2 is waaaay more concise than Act 2 of Veilguard, which is where most of the romance is happening.

That means that, even if there aren't that many romance scenes, they are better splayed out, so you don't feel like you're missing stuff. Another thing that I think happens is that you can really dive in and just ask the companion a lot of things.

Take Fenris's Questioning Beliefs quest in Act 2, which is a really important scene for the romance. Much like veilguard, its a scene that doesn't begin as a romance one but if you have been picking the flirting options, it can turn into Fenris and Hawke discussing about being intimate in the future. And in this scene, Fenris confesses to not having been with anyone in long, and doesn't remember if he actually ever has been with anyone.

This can be made so much longer by the fact that Hawke can ask multiple follow up questions from there, and that helps in both creating a connection between the two and also establishing the romance. Even if they don't do anything then, Fenris will say 'another time'.

And this happens in the act 3 version of Questioning Beliefs, which has the culmination of Fenris's and Hawke's romance, where their relationship is rekindled. And I think they do what Veilguard should have done: they let the player adress Fenris leaving Hawke.

One thing that bothered me, and that other people have brought up is that after Lucanis's runs away from the almost kiss, it's never adressed again. And I think if they could have had a moment where Rook and Lucanis talk about this, it could have been great to understand Lucanis and his history with relationships, how he feels internally about what's going on with them, heck maybe even apologize. Just something to feel that that wasn't a random scene, that was something important that happened.

Also, because you can interrogate Fenris so much in those scenes, the feeling that he was yearning for Hawke but all his trauma was stopping him felt more natural/real/explicit. I remember getting to the endgame portion of Veilguard and Lucanis pulling out the 'when i wanted to be with you but was scared' and thinking this is a lovely sentiment but why it hasn't been shown before? Because yes, the almost kiss is a good way to establish this, but if it had been actually delved in, that feeling could have been made more explicit.

I also wanted to add that, while the gift giving in DA2 is nowhere near the mechanic it was in DAO, it still helped with establishing that connection, and it gave even more chances for characters to flirt, and if DATV had used this opportunity, it could have helped a lot, instead of just having the character go "for me? thanks"

'Banter'

I'm gonna adress two issues here at once. The first is Neve.

Out of the gate, hating on Neve just because she flirts with Lucanis and gets with him if you don't romance either of them is weird, and at the very least, sexist.

So, what I want to talk about is that if you're romancing either of them, for some reason, their flirting banters still trigger and that can be uncomfortable. It sure is weird to be romancing a character and have them still flirt with another, because it comes across as 'oh maybe the choice to romance them doesn't change much' which isn't good for an RPG.

DA2 also has a couple that flirts through banter and gets together if Hawke doesn't romance them, and those are Isabela and Fenris. The difference is that, if you romance either of them, those flirty lines of banter do not trigger. At all. So much so I had no idea they got together because I've only romanced Fenris so far in DA2, so i never even knew of these banters until I looked at the wiki.

So, truly, lucanis and neve getting together is fine (i think neve should have been with bellara but that's another story) but these flirting line should not trigger if either of them are being romanced by Rook.

Still on the topic of banter, maybe I was unlucky and didn't get it to trigger often, but I felt as if, even though everyone was living together, the fact that Rook and Lucanis were in a relationship was not really ever addressed by anyone else? Like, I know these banters exist because I've seen them online, but I feel like there were just too little of them?

In comparison, the DA2 characters have a LOT to say about Hawke's choice of partner (and again, I'm focusing on Fenris here). Merrill adresses the romance through banter ('you make sad puppy eyes whenever Hawke looks away'), Varric, Isabela and Anders have specific scenes where they talk to Hawke about Fenris and give their opinions on the two of them together. Heck, in Aveline's quest where she gets with Donnic, she can briefly mention the two of them. And these all of them also have banter in which they adress the romance.

And its this sort of thing that really helps filling in the gaps of the romance scenes but also showing that these characters know what is happening. And the DA2 gang doesn't even live together!

And for Lucanis in specific, if there always was going to be less scenes with him due to how he is a person, having a few scenes where the other companions talk to Rook about it would have helped bridge that gap, in my opnion. Again, considering you can't directly talk to this characters (as in, click on them and start a dialogue), this would have been a nice touch.

And now a very personal complait of mine

'Kisses and the Commit to Romance scene'

While I stated at the very begging that I don't care about sex scenes, that is another story when it comes to kissing scenes, and I'm sorry, but it's WILD to put the ONLY kissing scene in the romance AT THE ENDGAME PORTION OF THE GAME.

Give it or take, kissing is an intimate act and it can be used, in my opinion, to show that a character is comfortable with that sort of physical touch. And for a character like Lucanis, who is just so troubled, maybe one kiss before the grand finale would have been really fucking welcomed. In fact, I know the scene they could have added that - the one in the café after Ilario is taken down.

It could have been a short, sweet kiss, that was just a follow up to the almost kiss scene. Just something to hammer in more that these characters are together.

Because let me tell you, it is not a good sign when people say they thought the game was bugged after the dessert scene.

That scene, while lovely on its own, does a bad job of making it clear that yeah, these characters are dating now, and that's due to the fact that that is not something really said out loud.

I'm rewatching this scene as I type this out and at no point, is it made clear through dialogue that Rook and Lucanis are agreeing to being together. In fact, Lucanis says that what he's doing is not enough, and Rook disagreed with the sentiment and says they're easily bribed. That's it.

Meanwhile, in DA2, not only in act 2, do Fenris and Hawke lowkey make plans about being intimate at a later date, and Fenris explicitly says he wants Hawke, but in act 3, he once again makes it clear that he wants to be with Hawke, and I feel like this only really happens with Lucanis at the endgame portion of the game.

This is all to say that: The Lucanis romance is lacking, and that Bioware has done something like this before and they did a better job then than now.

[haru-dipthong]

Fansub release + translation notes for Utena ep 33

Some very fun lines to translate this episode! Even though this is kind of a summary flashback episode, it’s actually one of my favourites of the series, and it has some of the most interesting dialogue too, with the one-sided Utena conversations and the shadow girl radio show.

Let’s start with the line I spent the longest trying to figure out.

今夜の二人は永遠さ！

This literally means “Tonight’s pairs of people are eternity!” But in context, this is a radio host waxing poetic about the beauty of the night. This literal translation doesn’t work at all given the intent behind the words. This line is a huge challenge because it’s so concise and exploits the ambiguity of the は particle. 今夜の二人は永遠さ doesn’t necessarily mean that tonight’s couples are eternity. It just states that “tonight’s couple(s)” are what we’re talking about, and then says eternity is closely related to them. In academic circles I believe は is often translated more as “as for”, so it’s more like “As for tonight’s couples… Eternity!”

Here are some other examples of how this line was translated.

Tonight, we'll be together forever! (ohtori.nu)

Nicely ambiguous, and I like “together forever” coupled with “tonight”, but “we’ll” makes it sound like she’s either talking directly to her co-host, or she’s somehow involving herself in the listener couples she’s talking to.

A night for couples to glimpse eternity. (internet archive subs/dubs)

This reads nicely and sounds like something a radio host would say, but I don’t like “glimpse”. It makes it feel like eternity is something in the distance, something that you don’t need to concern yourself with. But in Utena, eternity is not in the distance. It’s looming over everything, an immanent threat that’s already got you in its clutches. Eternity, at least in this line, needs to feel tempting and attainable all at once.

I needed to look back at more of the context to figure out my final translation. Here are the lines immediately prior:

今夜は星空がとってもきれいです！このラジオを聞きの皆様ももしよかったら窓から空を見てください！美しい秋の星座が瞬いていますのー！

The stars are beautiful tonight! To all our listeners out there, why not open a window and take a look at the sky? The stars of the autumn constellations are twinkling tonight.

The hosts are giving advice! So why not make the next line sound like a continuation of that advice?

My final translation was this:

If you're with someone special, go make tonight last forever!

This was 22 characters-per-second, which is slightly over the extreme 20 CPS limit I usually adhere to (I try to stay under 15 for most lines, allowing myself 20 for lines that really need it). But this one really needed the extra words. I hope it’s not too fast for most people! I’m really happy with the translation itself!

There were a couple of spots where I made the choice to change certain words because the direct translation of the word was inconvenient or conjured an incongruous image.

Utena: あの先生、明礬ってあだ名がついてるんだよ。

Utena: Everyone calls her "Sulphate" you know.

The word used here is 明礬 (myoban) which is the common name for the chemical salt of aluminium, known as “alum” in English. But “alum” as used to refer to a person is sure to be misinterpreted as “alumnus”, not a chemical. And not only that, the misinterpretation is extremely loaded here — the teacher graduated? That means A LOT in the Utena universe, and the Japanese word has none of this extra meaning. So instead, I chose a chemical salt that doesn’t come loaded with all this baggage, which is easily recognisable as a chemical but not too difficult so as to be reasonable as a nickname.

Utena: まー作り置きだと思えばいいんだけどさー。ハンバーグとかお弁当用に。でもシチュー系は無理だな。

Utena: I guess it’s fine to make a bunch and eat it later. Like, use it as a side or in a bento. But you can’t do that with stuff like curry.

I changed two things here: the use of ハンバーグ and the use of シチュー系.

ハンバーグとかお弁当用に means “for stuff like hamburgs or bentos”. A hamburg is a popular Japanese dish comprised of basically a large flat meatball covered in a demi-glace type sauce, accompanied by a side salad, sometimes roasted potatoes, boiled broccoli and carrots, and often a side of rice. It’s the type of dish you can and must serve a lot of sides with, since the actual dish is basically just a meat patty. I translated this as “use it as a side or in a bento” because the word “hamburg” is confusing to English speakers without context. While “hamburg steak” is certainly a thing in English, it’s nowhere near culturally prevalent enough to be casually mentioned in conversation like Utena is doing here. It just sounds like hamburger, which would imply use of leftovers as a topping on the burger, which is simply not the case here. I removed the word hamburg entirely to avoid this confusion and keep the dialog clippy and natural.

The change to シチュー was less necessary and more of a personal pet peeve. In Japanese, the word シチュー (an english loanword from “stew”) only refers to ONE specific type of stew. This one:

However, if I translated it as “stew”, the audience will imagine something different to what Utena is thinking of. Probably something hearty and tomatoey. Something MORE different than say, a Japanese curry. In Japan, curry and cream stew are thought of as sibling dishes. They have basically the same ingredients, the only difference is the sauce it’s cooked in. So I opted to translate this as “stuff like curry” because if Utena had said カレー系 (curry-kei) instead, it would have meant pretty much exactly the same thing, because 系 (kei) means like “curry and similar foods to curry”. And I’d say in this context Japanese カレー (curry) is part of シチュー系 (stuff like japanese cream stew). This is all very nitpicky and doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things, but it matters to me!

And now for one of the most harrowing scenes in the whole show. The bento planning scene.

困ったな // I’m so lost.

どうしよう // What should I do?

名にも思い浮かばないや // My mind’s gone blank.

あと、どうしよう？ // What else can I do?

ね、なにがいいかな？ // What… what do you think?

わからないな // I have no idea.

I’ll leave the climax of the scene for you all to watch yourselves, I won’t spoil it here. And I don’t really want to explain the reasoning behind these translations because I think explaining it will cheapen the meaning somehow. But I do want you to know that a lot of thought went into this scene.

Thank you so much to @dontbe-lasanya for editing! And for sticking to this project for so long. We're almost at the end!

Follow the blog to keep updated with new releases. You can find all previously released episodes here:

Rose divider taken from this post.

[itsaspectrumcomic]

Hello! I'm an autistic person with a high level of verbal reasoning. Spatial discrepancies don't bother me as much as linguistic, rhetorical, or logical discrepancies. When explaining a concept, my options are

A. Explain the idea completely.

B. Refrain from explaining the idea. (Inflicts mental stress.)

C. Explain the idea partially/making use of fallacies/making use of untrue statements. (Inflicts severe mental stress to the point of meltdowns, often in the form of speech loss, social avoidance, and extreme frustration. (as opposed to anger))

These effects ensue even if I am not explaining the idea, but if the information being presented contains these traits. I also live in Alabama. What approach would you suggest I take to mentioning and explaining autism to the people in my life it would be relevant to? What course of action should I take when another blonde teen talks about 'retarded autistic fucks' employing many fallacies. How do I explain this to teachers, and parents, and peers. Any coping strategies or stuff? Sorry this stretched on, I'm going to stop myself here. If you need further clarification I am more than happy to provide it. Thank you!

Hi! It's possible to explain a lot of concepts briefly without resorting to false statements. If you find yourself trying to explain certain concepts over and over again (like autism and how it affects you), it might help to write your explanations out in full, and then try rewriting it shorter and more concisely in a way you are still comfortable. You can try this multiple times, maybe just making it a little shorter each time rather than trying to do it all at once. If you have a counsellor or another figure you trust, you could also share your shortened versions with them to check if they still make sense. Please don't push yourself too hard on this though if there's a risk of a meltdown- your health is more important.

I know it can be hard to take out certain details when everything feels important - as autistic people we can find it difficult to understand something unless we know absolutely everything about it and/or why it needs to be done a certain way. But removing some details doesn't necessarily mean what you're saying is untrue, and a lot of people find concepts easier to understand if explanations are short and include only the absolute most important details.

Personally I like to use pictures to explain concepts I find difficult to articulate - that's why I started making comics! You could try drawing your own, or find other peoples' comics you find explain things well and share them with your teachers, parents and peers to help them understand.

Unfortunately you can't stop other people from lying, spouting falsities or being straight up assholes. In scenarios like that it might be best to remove yourself from the situation, put on headphones so you can't hear, or find a way to distract yourself. If you have a trusted person with you, maybe you could talk to them about supporting you when things like that happen, and what they could do to help.

I hope this can make things a little easier for you.

[lupinescribbler]

3 Tips for Writing Humor

To start this off, humor is pretty subjective, and can be written well in so many different ways. These are really just what I've found help my own writing :) use or discard as you see fit.

Integrate different types of humor

This is almost more a character writing tip, but consider giving your characters different types/senses of humor! It can overall enrich the humor of the story, dialogue, and characterization. Not everyone needs to be throwing out action-hero quips. Ex: completely deadpan, quippy, roasting, sarcasm, loud=funny, bizarrist/surprise humor, committing way too hard to the bit, physical comedy/slapstick, puns, refined/intellectual humor, gallows/dark humor.

2. Subvert expectations + timing

These are pretty classic concepts in comedy, hence why I merged them, but I figured they were worth elaborating on a little. To subvert expectations sometimes takes a little extra time to sit back and think beyond your initial gut-impulse. You can also have a test reader read up to a certain point and guess at what comes next, sometimes our own conception of what is expected is going to be very different from a reader's. A note of warning: if you want a story with even a hint of heart/seriousness, try not to subvert all the serious/heartfelt stuff. Any time you sabotage a serious moment for a laugh, it comes at the cost of your audience's engagement in that aspect of the story. It can be done, and can even help the eventual heartfelt moment feel even better, but be considerate of it! Subverting where the audience expects a joke to go, however, is pretty free -- granted the new punch line is as funny or funnier.

Timing can be easier to do in a visual medium versus written, but try rereading what you wrote and seeing if any parts feel too quick or too slow. If they're too quick, think of what you can add to it to lengthen anticipation. If they're too slow figure out how to make it more concise or what you can cut from the scene/dialogue.

3. Consider overall tone of story and scene + Integrate the comedy

Subverting expectations is a pinnacle of comedy, and a lot of books manage to pull off tonal discordance in their stories, but this generally has to be done with a level of intentionality. You should try to consider what you want from a scene or from the story in general. If you want a story to be serious/heartfelt, consider if a specific comedic moment/humor services and enhances the rest of the story, or comes at the cost of it. I generally try to work through this by integrating the humor into the emotion. Let a scene have moments of heartbreaking emotions, before coming up for air with a joke. Quips or jokes to cheer a down character up after a heavy conversation. Poke a little fun before delving in earnest to the emotions. If you can make your reader both laugh and cry in one scene you're probably doing it right.

[cryingpariah]

OC Ask Game!!! (Aka my personal questions)

The rules are you need to answer the questions concisely but with detail.

1. Out of your OCs, which one do you like writing for the most? And which one wracks your brain trying to think of?

2. Is your style to give your OCs just a funny little haha thing or are you serious about them? (Or how about both like me?)

3. What were some original names for Jackie?

4. What were some original names for Urpi?

5. If you could canonize 1 which one would you want to be real?

6. What were the inspirations for Jackie?

7. What were the inspirations for Urpi?

8. Who’s the best cook of your OC’s?

9. How thought out is your Pantheon of OP Gods and Goddesses?

10. If Urpi had a Pokémon team, what would they be?

11. If Jackie had a Pokémon team, what would they be?

HEHE OK LET'S GO!!

1. All of them have their difficulties but Jackie is by far the easiest since she’s the most relaxed and casual of the bunch so her lines come out a lot easier. Duelua is probs the hardest because she speaks the most formally and haughty and I have to search up a lot of word synonyms for her dialogue 😭😭!

2. Middle but leaning more towards silly. I’m more of a silly person by nature so most of their stuff is at least 35% silly at all times!

3. You may not have figured this out but I’m not great with names (I completely stole her name from her main inspo but we'll get to that). I knew I wanted a more nickname-y name if that makes sense so ones like Andy were in my head a lot.

4. I did not name Urpi, all credit to that goes to Taurus, but the idea of Mother of Dragon/Wife of Garp rattled around in my head loooong before I started yapping on Tumblr.com. I toyed around with a lot of Latin names based off Dragon's influences and Luffy's real world ethnicity. Names like Lucia and Helena for example. Urpi fits her best though!! I would change nothing about that lovely dovely lady!

5. DINO WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THIS?? I CAN'T PICK BETWEEN MY GIRLS LIKE THAT 😭😭😭! If I must pick I’d say Urpi or Jackie since they’re the most fleshed out?? Maybe ultimately Jackie since she’s my baby…

6. Jackie inspos - Hermes (generally like the idea of hermes, the messenger that also works for the underworld), Jack Kelly from Newsies (stole his name, stole his job, stole his songs for the Jackie playlist I’m still making, highway robbery atp), Katherine Plumber from Newsies (journalist who has an asshole of a journalist father hmmmm), Princess Bubblegum from AT (Girls who try their hardest to find better means to ends, also a little evil), Young Queen Charlotte from Queen Charlotte (She’s also sorta a voice claim. Jackie is British reminder jumpscare).

7. Urpi Inspirations - My actual mother (gotta think like the mom to write the mom), Kate Sharma from Bridgerton (a younger Urpi's lethal face claim), Wonder Woman (the gal of all time), the Unicorn from the Last Unicorn (mmm angst), Captain America (yes I’m mixing Marvel and DC, no I don’t care).

8. Mimi would happily take the crown…and give it to Urpi. She knows when she’s been beat. In order from best to worst it goes Urpi -> Mimi -> Jackie -> Duelua (moon lady does not understand cooking food. New races sure but dishes don’t compute in her head).

9. They have names…I should really iron them down but Due has all my focus on that front lol. I come back to them eventually (I say, thinking of a new OC completely).

10. Her team is varied but she’s a Flying, Fighting and Metal type of gal! She’s got a Metagross, Scizor, Lucario, Altraia and an Ho-oh!

11. Again, varied team but she def has a preference, for Jackie that’s Flying and Physic! She has a Delibird, Decidueye, Pidgeot, Reuniclus, and a Lugia!

[sfstranslations]

how hard(?) would you say it is to translate? Ive been kinda curious about that, like does anything get lost in translation/ just not make that much sense without knowing the og language? or anything like that? 🤔

Hm, maybe 7 or 8 on a scale of 10? Though it can easily go higher at times, haha. (Always when Sung Hyunjae is in a scene because his name is a misspelling and it pisses me off.* This is a joke. Only half, though.) Basic word-by-word dictionary lookup is simple, which is why machine translators can do it well enough. But then you have to string all of it together in a sentence where you:

figure out and find a way to convey any difference in connotation between this specific chosen word and other words that mean the same thing (think the connotations of "regal" VS "royal" in English), and

do the same as above, but on a sentence-wide level translating the nuance of a particular grammar/sentence structure (thousand and one sentence endings in Korean, I swear -_-), and

make sure distinct character voices are retained or translated from the original Korean (think Song Taewon's stiff formality VS Han Yoojin's more casual speech VS Sung Hyunjae's middle-aged rich guy-type speech), and

make sure this sentence flows with the overall paragraph/chapter.

All those priorities have to be juggled throughout the chapter and add up to make it a fairly hard task. It definitely gets easier with practice once you're more familiar with the language (especially the nuance/connotation stuff), though, and I did get lucky in that my native language shares some aspects with Korean so the grammar is easier to intuitively grasp. Of course, I'm still learning, so I do have times I need to call in more experienced speakers for help.

(I definitely wouldn't say I'm good with the language period. Recently I've tentatively picked up a new novel—people following my personal blog will know which one—and it turns out I'm familiar with the way Geunseo talks and familiar with the vocabulary typical to dungeon fantasy novels, but kind of. Majorly hopeless when it comes to other stuff. The phrasing is juuust off enough that I keep getting tripped up and taking thrice as long to understand what's being said.)

There's definitely stuff that wouldn't make sense in English—certain idioms, cultural stuff, and all that, but that's why I try to localize wherever possible and add footnotes with relevant info/links if not. And there is stuff that gets lost in translation—you can look at the chapter titles from 302–307 for an example of that, where the joke is much more immediately obvious in Korean but had to be translated differently as chapter title VS in-chapter text messages and lost the clear parallel. I also remember being grumpy back during the virtual reality dungeon arc because Yoohyun would use 네놈 (ne-nom but typically pronounced ni-nom, a derogatory way to say "you", LMAO) towards Sigma and there was no concise way to get that across in English except having him be aggressive and direct. Especially since he isn't the type to swear by word of god, so I couldn't have him addressing him with "asshole" or "jerk" to convey it.

TL;DR: Fairly hard to translate, but gets easier with time, and there is stuff that's lost or difficult to understand, but I do what I can to make it understandable in English!

--

* Sung Hyunjae uses "ae" at the end, but that implies it's 성현재, which is wrong—the correct spelling is 성현제, which should be "Sung Hyunje". (If you wanted to go the full Revised Romanization route, it'd be Seong Hyeonje, but I've weathered my share of name changes and that's a step too far even for me.) I've been meaning to make a poll about changing it like with the Lauchitas spelling, but I keep forgetting.

[datapacks]

i agree that mojang's insistence on uniqueness is not only weird, but also it makes every new feature feel like "oh hey, we wanted to add a new biome but it had to be unique enough for it to get added, so here's a whole new game mechanic we only got made through a blood sacrifice" i think the pale garden is *close* to a reasonable balance, but the fact it doesn't just Exist and instead requires a whole conference about what's new and unique about it makes it fit that precedent of "new things need to be NEW new" but also if the pale garden had just been a new biome with no new mobs or mechanics, with a unique grass and foliage colors people might would've complained about it being underwhelming

i think something that could make it feel a bit less like "this is a mod someone had an idea for that's completely self contained" would be making the mechanics more universal, like if we got a few different resin types (like an earthy green one in the jungle biome), or like if the hanging moss could generate in other forest biomes like how spanish moss isn't just confined to small areas. the new mechanics don't Need to feel isolated, but the way they're getting implemented makes it feel like they're just adding stuff for the sake of adding stuff and not considering the rest of the game *despite* saying they want to go back and revisit old things... it's so strange!

Yeah like they keep saying they always try to fit every feature into every pre-existing feature and that's "why updates take so long even when they seem to add so little" then you look at their actual development pipeline and 80% of what they show as examples is just texture tweaks. Idk I have a lot of scrambled thoughts on all of this I'll figure out how to word it more concisely later.

[mrsroryhuntzberger]

My thoughts on Ginny and Georgia Season 3 Episodes 4-10. Major spoilers. Also it’s basically what I was thinking while watching not concise at all lol

Ep 4

* “I put your name on the prayer list” lol

* I hope Georgia and zions mom end up on good terms Georgia needs a mother figure

* Did Ginny not go looking for Marcus after she FaceTimed her mom??????? Did his parents not know he was gone????

* Also Paul is freaking out what did Nick tell her? That his boyfriend was investigating her for murder?

* Max don’t cover for your brother he’s in a bad place and needs help

* “See things fall apart without me” Georgia I think things were falling apart BECAUSE of you

* Nothing screams innocent like practicing crying in the mirror

* My prediction: Paul is gonna stay with Georgia throughout the trial and she’ll be found not guilty and will celebrate but he will tell her he wants a divorce then. It’ll be very good wife when the husband won but Alicia found out he cheated with kalinda so while he celebrated she packed his things and got him a place to live. Paul will do the same. Or maybe if they don’t divorce they will be together publicly but separated privately

* Or maybe Paul will stay for the kids bc he’s a good father figure to them

* With the exception of whatever is going on with Abby and Sam and that asshole dude I am enjoying the teen storylines

* Okay also with the exception of Maxine and her gf Maxine’s other storyline is cool but her and her gfs get old

* Also respectfully and disrespectfully Maxine is such a theater kid

* “I need the people I love to stop doing illegal shit” poor Ginny asking for the bare minimum

* “I don’t love you anymore” damn

* Damn not him saying it again

* These teenagers need to stop drinking their brains aren’t fully developed

* They make running look so good I hate running but maybe I should start

* I hope Paul gets the kids in the divorce

* “What’s vandalism?” “It’s when you trash a classroom so you don’t have to go to school” GEORGIA NO DO NOT SET THIS UP FOR AUSTIN

* “He dumped coffee on another student” “it was lukewarm”

* Wolfe is older Cal from Manifest

* “Georgia for what it’s worth I don’t think you’re a murderer” but she literally is

* I feel like Norah is the most under-developed of the main teens

* Lol not faerie smut being mentioned

* Georgia that is not modest

* I mean technically Georgia is a serial killer the definition says 3 or more murders and she’s done 3 at least

Ep 5

* I love the opening song (“way down we go” by KALEO)

* Poor Ginny

* “None of this is true” Georgia all of it is true

* Zion do not team up with Gil do not listen to him

* Max fucking defend Ginny how can you possibly think she knew about the murder

* “Paul might not leave he loves us” poor Austin

* Not a reporter questioning a minor without an adult present and on school grounds

* Good on her ex and his gf for getting her out of there (I don’t remember their names)

* I’m losing some empathy for Norah like I get it’s tough but she’s not being supportive

* GOOD ON GINNY PUNCH PRESS he’s such an asshole

* Omg science museum I love it

* …I wanna go to this science museum

* I kinda like Wolfe this date montage was very cute

* Oh no not Marcus seeing Ginny and Wolfe kissing

* Also how long is she gonna be able to keep the Gia stuff going maybe five more minutes if that

* Little Ginny doesn’t look like teen Ginny and it bothers me

* Poor poor Austin and ginny

* They might not be blood related but I want Paul to get custody of Austin

* The poor kids having to deal with reporters and their family falling apart and their friendships suffering too

* Shit not the poem coming back to bite Ginny

* Shit not social services coming for the kids honestly I’m kinda surprised it didn’t happen sooner

* Oh fuck Gil

* Separating the kids is fucking awful

* Oh fuck you Zion

* Also all of this in front of reporters Jesus and their stuff in trash bags this is so traumatic and awful

Ep 6

* Of course Ginny isn’t gonna listen to Zion

* Sometimes georgias accent feels too southern drawl other times she sounds exactly like my southern grandma especially in the scene calling Ginny drunk

* Poor Ginny even when she’s at her dads she has to parent her mom reminding her that calling could look bad and then having to hang up and block her own mother who she was just taken from this poor kid

* “It can’t get worse than this” Georgia it can

* Norah Ginny isn’t her mom I get it’s a tough position being close to the family of the dead guy but taking it out on Ginny isn’t fair

* I feel for max it’s hard feeling left out

* It sucks separating Austin and Ginny

* “I have a responsibility to those kids” “they’re not really your children” fuck you nick “I love them nick” go off Paul again I want Gil gone and Paul to get partial custody of Austin

* Yeah Zion this is what happens when you don’t listen

* This is random but georgias car still has a Texas license plate she needs to get her registration updated

* Zion is having to deal with the consequences of his rushed actions

* I’m kinda on board with the Marcus and Georgia friendship I think they both need someone right now

* The set for the assholes basement and this Cambridge party have got to be the same and I find it kinda funny

* I like Wolfe he’s probably not long term material but he’s what Ginny needs and so far he’s not an asshole

* I’m less on board with the Georgia Marcus friendship bc it feels like Georgia unloading her shit onto another teenager who cannot handle it right now

* Pleas Ginny do not have sex on top of a washer

* Georgia calling from Marcus phone is gonna backfire and spur Ginny onto Wolfe

* Wolfe is a dork I like him

* Okay his actor is my age I’m allowed to find him attractive lol

* “Do you have any idea how worried I’ve been??” “Now we’ve had sex” Zion is not ready for any of this

* I love that Zion is spilling all the tea in front of Joe who just wants to serve the man his drink

* Awwww Paul petitioned for custody of Austin

* Paul and Zion should beat up Gil. Joe should also get in on that

* Look I’m all for calling Georgia out and she’s made bad choices but she really loves her kids and tries even tho she’s not always good at it (never forget she fucked their credit scores)

* Ginny is def a better friend to Norah than Norah to Ginny

* Also someone else is gonna be pregnant probably Ginny bc she just had sex with Wolfe

* “I’m always princess peach and I’m not willing to compromise on that” same Joe same

* Georgias dad tried to kill her??? Did we know this???

* Oh shit Ginny is pregnant this is why we wrap it before we tap it

Episode 7

* They should blame Gil or at least try to introduce that idea in court. Gil has a history of violence, was previously in prison, there are multiple people who can attest to his physical abuse of Georgia and he has a bone to pick with whatshername because she blocked his apartment application

* “What did I always tell you about love?” “That you can’t trust love?” “That love is a lie?” Stellar parenting Georgia

* “I bet your mom never lets you have ice cream for dinner!” “She does. All the time”

* “Your mom’s not normal…she’s got a lot of issues…it’s not my fault” it is your fault fuck you Gil

* “I’m pregnant” “that’s wild” Wolfe do not let me down now

* This is Chekhov's positive pregnancy test I swear

* Georgia please call someone on Ginny’s behalf she can’t go alone she’ll be angry in the moment but it’ll work out

* I know I said call someone but I didn’t mean Marcus call max

* Not this lifetime rip off making Ginny white

* “It’s open” GEORGIA WHY IS THE DOOR UNLOCKED

* Ginny needs so much more therapy

* Omg are Georgia and Joe gonna hook up he’s shirtless and literally dripping wet in her house

* Like Chekhov's positive pregnancy test, Chekhov’s intimate moment between Joe and Georgia will come back and I think it’ll involve Paul

* GEORGIA DONT

* Fuck I knew she was gonna use it

Episode 8

* Again love the soundtrack

* I don’t know how I feel about Wolfe I don’t think he’s a bad person and he really likes Ginny but he handled the pregnancy poorly but also he’s a teenage boy and the freak out is understandable

* NOT GIL MAKING AUSTIN THROW AWAY THE HARRY POTTER GLASSES EXECUTE THE MAN

* Cynthia do not steal a tablet also why is the tablet randomly in the lost and found that should be locked up

* Glad Cynthia saved the glasses

* Abby and Marcus is also a dynamic I like

* “Cause God has a plan for me and you’re not in it” lol I love Abby

* Is young Georgia stealing a car???

* Lol not Georgia making sure cheaters never prosper

* I’m fully skipping the rehearsal scenes I don’t care

* “Anna loves to ride” “well that much is obvious”

* “Ginny wants going on with you?” “My mom is on trial for murder”

* “You’re so babygirl” Ginny omg you’re gonna break Joe

* I was wondering when the ED storyline was coming back

* Awwww okay empathy back to Norah that was sweet telling Ginny her brother was gonna be there and inviting her to come over and see him

* JOE PUNCHED GIL OH MY GOD Joe is now my favorite Paul and Zion would never

* I was so worried for Austin for a minute

* Awww Austin was so excited to see Paul

* Oh fuck Gil

* I’m conflicted about Paul I almost like him too much for him to be in this situation but I also want Austin to be happy again split custody with Paul

* “No more secrets between us okay?” You mean like a fake pregnancy

* I also have mixed feelings about Zion he’s trying kinda but he’s not doing a good job and he’s trying too late. It’s also hard bc the audience knows so much more than the characters we know why Georgia killed these guys, why she got involved with a gang, why she made these choices but Zion doesn’t know why all he knows is she made decisions that put his daughter at risk and suddenly realizing he doesn’t know the woman he thought he knew and second guesses everything he knows

* There’s still no excuse for teaming up with Gil

* “You guys make so many decisions but I’m the one who’s affected” this sums Ginny’s life up so much

* “I’m not sorry for protecting you but I’m sorry for not doing it sooner” he’s missing the point I fear

* Yeah Zion Georgia shooting someone in the hand was a red flag

* It’s so shitty that Zion and Gil didn’t even discuss getting the kids together they are siblings who went from living together to not seeing each other that’s traumatic

* Zion better piece it all together

* I do love the bro bonding of Georgias exes/current man

* Is Paul gonna figure it out??? Honestly he probably should divorce Georgia and again get custody of Austin

* “Hi” “hey” “hi” “hey” “hi” “are you bulimic??”

* “I burn myself well I used to” “I have herpes well cold sores” “I had an abortion last week” “…I don’t have another one” “my first orgasm was with a toothbrush!” “I do get ready with me in faerie makeup” This is so much chaotic support I love it

* Also as an ACOTAR fan I am living for the faerie smut stuff it’s hilarious

* “Max is gonna be really mad we trauma bonded without her”

* Yup Paul figured it out it’s understandably divorce time Georgia you can get out of this

* “Lying to me about being a father” it is so fucked up when Paul says this

* Yeah I agree with Paul Georgia you’re the reason the kids are gone at least part of it

* OH SHIT OH SHIT PAUL PUNCHED THE WALL BY HER HEAD I gasped

* Oh shit he really verbalized her worst fears

* On one hand I don’t think Paul is right about Georgia being the most selfish person but on the other hand he’s not wrong? Like yes she does stuff for her kids but I think she makes the wrong choices on times for selfish reasons. Or like she picks the worst option because it’s what she wants like she doesn’t want to deal with Zion after their breakup so she and the kids live out of her car instead of being in his apartment or she wants to provide her kids with stuff so she steals things. She doesn’t want to handle the consequences of her own actions so she forces her family to move and uproots her kids and doesn’t provide them a stable life

* Omg not the girls egging Abby’s dad house in faerie dress up

* Paul divorcing Georgia: valid. Paul supporting letting big business and turning his back on local businesses: shitty wtf man

* I hope Ginny and Austin don’t find out about the divorce from the news but they probably will because these kids have to suffer

* I know Georgia will get out of this but idk how

* Is Georgia gonna get the literal gang involved?

* Oh shit is she going on the run

* Oh shit she just kissed Joe

* Oooooh he’s kissing her now damn are they gonna go on the run together?

* “I’m about to go on the lamb” sex time

* Hello what about your ankle monitor?

* Oh shit that’s a lot of empty bottles

* This is so bad Georgia

* I guess she cut the ankle monitor off somehow

* Awww the flashbacks with tiny Austin

* And she immediately got arrested Jesus Christ

* “I couldn’t do it I turned myself in” at least stick to going on the lamb Georgia my god

* Poor Ginny

Episode 9

* I’m actually enjoying starting from max POV

* Does she have OCD? The “wrong everyone I love will die” sounds like OCD with the bedroom lights

* Max is gonna forget about the chicken

* Called it

* Also max tell your parents about your brothers drinking that’s bad shit

* Fuck you Gil

* Poor Austin I feel so bad for everyone but mostly for Austin he’s stuck with Gil and has lost the only father figures he had and now Gil wants to take him away from Ginny??? And he’s just a kid

* I hate Gil so much

* “I’m his sister!” “Half sister” MOTHERFCUKING JOE COME BACK HERE AND BEAT HIS ASS

* HE GRABBED HER HOLY SHIT

* I am literally gasping so much rn

* Oh good on fucking Cynthia “it’s pepper spray” this is why we need to get Gil

* I need a Cynthia and Georgia team up to take down Gil

* I feel bad for Max a lot has happened and she understandably feels left out and her current gf kinda sucks

* Awww tiny Max, Norah and Abby

* Omg I just noticed young Norah is wearing fairy wings so she’s always been into fae that is a hilarious detail

* “I’ll see you soon…when I visit next” that’s sweet I like Joe

* Awwww poor Max

* Okay I’m on kid Maxs side they wanted to show the dance off it takes 30 seconds you can talk after

* “If you tell mom and dad I will never speak to you again. I will never forgive you” poor max poor Marcus these poor kids

* I skipped the musical scenes I’m sorry but I got the important info and am glad max talked to her parents and started talking more I disagree with her mom I think max needs to talk to her friends it will build up and spill out

* “Max don’t be dramatic again” Abby no

* Also the camera looked down right on max and she looked so much like Marcus except for young Ginny the casting on Ginny and Georgia is great

* Poor max

* Why is Austin taking the stand????

* OH SHIT THEY ARE PINNING IT ON GIL

Episode 10

* Did they know Austin was gonna say that?

* Damn Ginny is taking a play out of her moms book

* This is what I’ve been saying all along!! Gil would be perfect with his violent nature and motive against Cynthia

* The court case is over and there’s still another hour left what’s next

* Gil is gonna come at her and Austin still has to go home to him until the custody stuff is handled…

* Good on Georgia putting down the wine

* The court case finished up really quickly

* Oh good Austin is at Zions

* And now they can go home the next day this is wrapping up too well too fast

* WHAT IF GEORGIA RUNS FOR MAYOR

* Georgia needs to lay low and accept the miracle she didnt go to prison

* “You wouldn’t understand Joe until you’ve been with a woman like that” “yeah I wouldn’t understand”

* Ginny lied about the cameras omg she played Cynthia

* “I’m petitioning for joint custody” that’s fine I mean it’s a little late but it’s not the worst thing

* Poor Austin

* “Austin’s gonna be okay right?” Girl ask him you’re his mom

* Georgia in therapy??? Miracle!!

* Ugh is Marcus gonna turn Ginny against Max?

* Ginny going to Korea with her dad interesting

* Of course Marcus is failing honestly his parents have kinda sucked this season they are putting more responsibility on max

* Abby why are you being an ass about max I don’t get it

* Norah they aren’t fighting but max this isn’t the place for this convo

* Marcus don’t give Abby alcohol at school

* Awww Wolfe showed up

* Lol not the racist teacher getting called out

* Junior year is hell year good luck

* Also not Marcus lying to Ginny he needs help

* I agree god help Austin he needs it

* Damn Paul did get recalled I’m not surprised

* Good Paul fire Nick he’s been awful

* Poor Max I feel like the Baker family is slowly becoming a mess and it gets swept under the rug but it’s gonna blow up

* “Don’t make me regret setting you free” oh shit

* Also Georgia you can’t be surprised Ginny learned from your actions

* You are not okay Marcus you need help Jesus what is happening in the baker family LOCK HIS WINDOWS

* Poor max Marcus has a huge issue and is being an asshole

* This is so awful

* Abby what is wrong with you poor max

* Ginny don’t be like this to Max

* Oh my god she just admitted it Joe well I guess she can’t be charged again because double jeopardy

* Oh she’s gonna full on confession

* Joe reallly went “you killed those people hot”

* Damn they are right person wrong timing Joe and Georgia

* These teenagers need to stop drinking

* No no no Paul I have some empathy but you didn’t lose the recall election because of Georgia you made your own choices. The divorce is valid but blaming her for your job issues and saying she made you worse isn’t fair

* “I didn’t make you anything that wasn’t in there already” get him Georgia

* “Kids drink it’s not a big problem” IT IS YOUR BRAIN ISNT FULLY DEVELOPED AND YOU ARE DRINKING SO MUCH he was legit blacking out before the suspension

* Ellen you have to make it a little worse for it to get better

* Also where tf is Austin we haven’t seen him in a while

* Marcus parents need to have a joint meeting with his therapist to discuss what they should do because he needs serious help they can’t provide him

* Poor Austin crying and holding his hockey jersey poor baby

* Austin broke his glasses and is mad at Ginny this poor poor kid

* Are they taking him to rehab??? I hope so he needs help

* Was that Georgias mom and stepdad??? The not murdering thing will be harder if they show up

* IS GEORGIA PREGNANT she said when she was pregnant with Ginny she craved milk

* Shit who is the daddy???

* Damn what a cliffhanger

[fable-on-the-table]

A ridiculously long review of the Wayfarer system

I posted this review to the Wayfarer system's itch.io page but I figured I may as well post it here too for posterity.

Truly I am not beating the 'tism allegations.

I've run three sessions of Wayfarer so far and my group has been really enjoying it, so get ready for a needlessly in-depth review of this entire system! I've given some feedback on some aspects that I'd like to see tweaked or expanded upon, so if you ever feel like releasing a 2nd edition I will 100% check it out. Please note that while I go into a lot of depth criticising some parts of the game, it's only because I want to really break it down and analyse it - not because it's really wrong! Despite my feelings about a few aspects of the game, you've still done a great job on Wayfarer and deserve a 5/5. I'm sure my players and I will enjoy this system for many sessions to come!

Stuff I liked!

The harm system. This is a really nice adaptation of Blades in the Dark's harm system, and I even think it's more naturally intuitive than how BitD does it. It makes players actually deal with the wounds they've suffered rather than limping around on only a few hitpoints with no consequences to their abilities.

Spirit. Spirit feels like a nice catch-all for the classic TTRPG trope of the per-day resource. I love that you can spend Spirit for flashbacks - super evocative!

Advantage and Disadvantage. A nice way of implementing it into a 2d6 based game! Feels very familiar and easy coming straight from D&D.

Recovery. I found the resting system clear and straightforward, and I love that it distinguishes between resting in the wilderness Vs resting in a civilised area. I also really like that you can spend more coin or supplies to recover more.

Skills. I like that skills do something other than just providing a numerical buff, but are still a way for you to manipulate your chances of failure/ success.

Abilities. All the abilities are very evocative and add a lot to the narrative. I think some of them could have used a little more explanation, but the GM can usually fill in any ambiguities.

The Sorcery Table. Great for coming up with a vast array of magical effects on the fly.

The explanation of soft & hard moves for the GM. Though I know you're not the first to come up with the concept of soft and hard moves, you explained it really well!

The guide to building threats. Your framework for building threats/ monsters is so concise and effective! I followed the guide for the first boss monster that my players faced, and that fight was some of the most fun I've had playing TTRPGS in a long time. Encouraging GMs to invent monsters that have specific weaknesses instead of a health bar is a great move, and encourages super creative and cinematic play!

Visual design. The layout of the rulebook and character sheet is great. I'm a designer myself, so I can always appreciate when the visuals and layouts are really on point!

Stuff I was less keen on

The names for the attributes. I might just be brainrotted from D&D but the names used for the five core attributes weren't my favourite. I kept getting resolve and prowess mixed up. But hey, I recognise that this one is super dependent on personal preference so it's more of a neutral comment than a critique.

The inventory and supply system. I see the vision for this - by having players' inventories not set in stone you give them a lot more options and remove the need for intensive pre-planning for an adventure. However, in my opinion this inventory system just takes something that almost all players understand intuitively ("which items do I have in my backpack") and makes it unintuitive and hard to understand. It feels like your inventory is in this weird quantum state where you don't know what's in your pack until you pull an item out. We tried to play it by the book for the first session, but we all ended up getting really confused and switching back to a more traditional system. Sorry, I think this system may just not be my cup of tea, but I do see why you made it this way. If I may suggest a compromise - you could always have a standard inventory system for crucial items like weapons, armour and quest items, and then "supply points" which you can spend to produce mundane items like spare clothes, food, camping equipment, etc. The Root RPG handles items in a similar way (and it's also PbtA!) so maybe it would be good inspiration for you. Each character has a "depletion" meter which tracks how much mundane supplies they have left, but more important items are handled as their own things. This way you can hand-wave the boring stuff and focus on the actually interesting items!

The coin system. Again, I feel that this was an already-simple mechanic that has suffered from being further oversimplified. I find it odd that any item (including coins?) cost 0 coin, and also the values of what each amount of coin can buy seem to progress exponentially rather than linearly. 1 coin buys you a martial weapon, but 6 coin buys you a meagre home. Does that mean you can trade six martial weapons for a meagre home? I'd assume not, but when it's so nonlinear it's very hard to tell. Another side effect of this system is that it makes it impossible for you to reward your players with wealth in drips and drabs. They can't stumble upon a few coins in a cabinet, for example, because that would count as 0 coin and make no numerical difference to their wealth. In my opinion, currency does not need an overhaul, because everyone understands how it works already. I've just been running it in the usual way, so every 1 coin has a fixed spending power. I also wrote up my own cost table to make it more linear. If the original version works for you, fine, but it's just not for me.

Stuff that I would like to see expanded on

Ritual magic. Love the concept, but at the moment the GM has to put in a lot of legwork to come up with ideas for rituals. Which is fine, but it's just a bit tricky when there's no framework at all provided. I'd love to see something along the lines of what we get for the sorcery domains table, but perhaps it's various key phrases that you can combine together to describe the function of a spell. For example you could have the key phrases "conjure", "destroy", "locate", and then "plants", "rocks", "fire", and those could be put together into "conjure rocks", "destroy rocks", "locate plants", "locate fire" etc etc. This would combo especially well with the list of drawbacks added to rituals which is already in the game!

Alchemy. Similar to my thoughts on ritual magic. Good starting point, but even a basic framework for what kind of potions a person can brew would be wonderful.

Types of weapons. The example gear sections lists "basic weaponry", "martial weaponry", "great weapons" and "beautiful weapons" as different things, but provides no distinction. Even a short line to give the weapon types some distinction would be awesome.

[clovenhoofedjester]

jellicle lineups; part 1/4

hi catsblur ! today i am presenting to you the fruits of my labor. my own little versions of the jellicle cats; obviously based on the replica designs With Fun Little Twists ! such as, they are not naked. ramble below the cut, both on designs and some personal thoughts on the characters

these designs are very much first-draft, subject to change, blah blah. you will very likely be seeing me drawing them differently if i post more of them. i just. urrbhhh. i had 2 draw them....

and the clothes ! even though they're very feline i draw them a bit too human-y for the nakedness to not look consistently weird. i will be drawing them closer to the stage designs in some instances but for rn. clothes. it was a fun exercise in character design too

the kittens are all young adults, think 18-20 ! as much as i love headcanons like demeter being sillabubs mother, it shrimply will not work out timeline-wise. so headcanons like that will be delegated to like... siblings and stuff

victoria | 🍧 💌 🩰

i started out with victoria's design not only because of her being the Main Kitten, but because she has such a concise and clear aesthetic to me. she actually started out with a simple pastel brown dance practice fit before i decided that i wanted to make the outfits ornate(ish) and ended up with a proper ballerina getup

i also quite like when victoria is not just solid white with some grey (love ones that are more yellow or brown) so i colored her fur with some blue and pink-ish tones not only to add more depth but to resemble the trans flag LOL

and i wanted to try something different with making her a bit more lavender than baby pink. i also based her overall look on obc victoria, portrayed by cynthia onrubia :^]

to move on to character interpretation, i think victoria is partially deaf and mute. she primarily communicates through dance. as one of the oldest kittens she'd be 19 in human years

plato | 💐 🕯 🍬

plato's design doesnt stray too far from his standard replica design but i tried to add my own flair . i tried to keep the creepy porcelain doll aesthetic going w their face added some more depth like some other designs with different colors and bold face stripes

i also really like the outfit i chose for them. the flower in their hair and on their shirt is a peony which is a popular wedding flower :") because im a sucker for platoria and very much subscribe to the idea that the ball we see is their funny cat wedding in a way

the outfit is based on standard ballerino costumes but i tried to stray from it with the silky half-skirt thing and pointe shoes. lets go queer cats lets go

i think plato is also very quiet and that's why he and victoria were so drawn to each other. i also quite like the idea that he was a bit of a troubled stray before he found the jellicles. they would be 20 in human years

electra |⚡🥭 🔔

boy i STRUGGLED with electra's clothes i struggled so hard. i think i'm happy with what i ended up with though—i originally gave her the babydoll dress that sillabub has (inspired by artsed electra) but figured that i wanted at least one of the girls to be more tomboyish/butchy. thank you to that one production which apparently had electra be one of the raffish crew and get in on some of the boys' choreography

im very happy with what i did with her fur colors as well. silly little tortoiseshell :] its based on a nonrep but i have no idea which one. enjoy her freckles too

i think electra deserves to be a little spunky. [whispers] i also think shes bombalurinas little sister. she'd be 18 in human years

etcetera | 🎠 🍯 🏅

i needed at least one cat with a circus aesthetic. say hello to my magnum opus: jacked tumbler acrobat etcetera. it was only a matter of time until someone said fuck it and let one of the girls perform lifts and stuff. this is mostly because ive always really liked how shes usually the cat to do the flying trapeze bit and wanted to push it further

i also struggled SO EXTREMELY HARD with making her colors look nice and makeup distinctive but i figured it out in the end—thank you obc cettie for the mismatched eyeshadow and such. i also wanted to give a cat a short bob type of head fur/hairstyle and she fit the bill

nothing much about specific character notes other than like... i want to make her related to some of the cats but cannot for the life of me figure out who 2 assign. also she'd be around 19 in human years, a couple months younger than vic

sillabub | 🌻 🧋 🎼

i think of all of these little fellas sillabub is my favorite. several elements are balanced in her design—the standard jemima with a darker/reddish palette, the more softer and lighter sillabub design, the red eye patch from il sistina jemima, and the overall aesthetic of obc jemima with the big hair and wide, deepset eyes

i've seen her typical design critiqued by some people and wanted to incorporate those critiques by making her look less similar to demeter/bombalurina, adding more red to her body fur, and making her makeup more distinct and less... wooo girl give us nothing. and i included the squiggly on her collarbone

i also really REALLY love her overall aesthetic of sweet kindhearted girl NAMED AFTER A DEMON WITH SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG COLORING AND GIGANTIC SPIKED COLLAR !!!! so i decided to push it by making the collar definitely too big for her, giving her a slightly "edgy" outfit and making her hair resemble devil horns

as for character stuff, i think she has magical powers though i haven't developed exactly What they are yet. beyond her sweet exterior they trouble her. [whispers] i also think shes demeters little sister. she would be 18 in human years, a few months younger than electra and tumblebrutus

pouncival | 🌱 🩹 🍵

i struggled with pouncival's clothing design like i did electra's because i didn't go into drawing him with a particular gimmick in mind. but i think i'm happy with the casual formal look. it makes him look like such a kind young man even if he's a little shit

i did have a lot of fun trying to make his makeup distinctive from tumblebrutus'—so many fellas with brown eyepatches ! so his colors are more dark and striking. i also tried to make him look less like Typical Cis Man by giving him a bit of black lipstick

enjoy his freckles too

but like. i think hes literally such a little cis guy. nothing else for me to add for my specific interpretation of him it's all laid out. this guy fucking loves rocket league, fishing and chess. he'd be 19 in human years

tumblebrutus | 🎡 🥊 🍦

SWEET TUMBLEBRUTUS. i think drawing him here gave me a soft spot for him. with his outfit mirroring cettie's i didn't much struggle with that. his colors are also based on obc tumblebrutus

when i was first conceptualizing my own versions of the cats i wanted at least one of them asides from grizabella to have wavy fur. and idk what it is, maybe it's the lack of content for him, but i was really drawn to the idea of curly tumblebrutus!

i wanted their design to be distinctive from pouncival's so i made their colors softer, kinda watercolor-y. OH AND THEIR FUR IS ALSO MEANT TO BE A LITTLE TRANS FLAG COLORED

as for character, i think he is also a bit troubled, as a son of grizabella's. you heard me, people. i'm probably the first person ever to headcanon that. he'd be 18 in human years

AND THAT'S ABOUT IT ! thank you for reading this far, have a great day and stay tuned for more designs in the days to come !

[givemedamage]

i dont really ramble slash just post my thoughts that much anymore bc im like an on edge bitch plus ive gotten ten times more incoherent off my meds and i dont wanna subject anyone to that except for in tags on art posting maybe sometimes ill be like BARRRRFFF WORDS but i wanna do it now bc. i just want to On that note like i definitely have posted dipshit dumbass stuff like oversharing stuff or stuff i no longer agree with or wish i worded better or didnt speak so soon on like i have a journal if i really need to tell the universe i just took a shit but ANYWAYTHATS NOT EVEN THE POINT OF THIS RAMBLE WAIT THIS WAS ART RELATED RAMBLING ok so like i've been trying to quote unquote relearn art for a hot minute cold second now and sometimes, ill think of that one ask i got that was like 'how do you draw furries' or How do you draw anthros or IT WAS SOMETHING LIKE THAT and i cant remember what exactly i replied ,GIVEN THAT IS A VERY VAGUE QUESTION BUT LIKE i definitely replied something strange and unhelpful like 'ufhhh just practice :D !!!!! find fun ways to furrify the furry idk' AND LIKE IF THAT WAS YOU IM SO SORRY i feel like there's so much stuff i didn't AND STILL DON'T OBVIOUSLY know even though ive been doing furry art since babyhood like how important fundamental whatever is WHICH I KNOW SOUNDS DUMB LIKE OBVIOUSLY FUNDAMENTALS ARE IMPORTANT but like. learning perspective and actual shading not just guessing and using people pose and animals pose references and doing figure studies and outside places studies has HELPED ME SO MUCH LIKE WOW WHAT THE FUCK there's just little things i never learned in art class. little things i'll notice like 'huh foot (paw?) placement is actually rlly awesome and also important drawing a character standing' or like 'so that's what a trapezius is' or like 'ohhh i get it now, things are scaled bigger when they're closer and i should be thinking about the pov also' which like the last time i was in an art class i was literally a FRESHMAN IN HS so like. like yeah But how to draw furries individual , i apologize but if i was asked that again id probably be like ''References and youtube tutorial and especially that animal skull github angle reference website saved my hide'' WHICH ISNT REALLY THAT BETTER OF A RESPONSE NOW THAT IM LOOKING AT IT BUT LIKE I COULDVE more concisely said (ironic sonsidering how fucking long this spiel is becoming)that i don't know what the fuck im doing but i love resources and i love pencils and skecthing and i love wawa color and painting and digitaling arting and i love my fake world and artists i love you and artists who struggle making art they want i love you and artists who want to do art but are nervous to start or are preoccupied with other shit i love you . i know stuffs really hard out here for everyone and excuse me for being so unspecific about it but it seems like everyday it's just another thing it's honestly getting hard to keep up with much less sum up my frustrations towards in a single already tragically rambly post and i hate it so much and stay safe and i'm sorry do not die quietly plus never kill yourself. Tl,dr; i run on sentence about how art is good and fun, (somewhat gushily and long windedly )

[indieyuugure]

You said we got two chapters of ROTP left.

Does that include "End Game" or no?

Also; I am sad ROTP is coming to a close soon, but I am also happy it is going to have a proper ending. Excited to see the last couple or few chapters or so. Including that chapter full of fluff and wholesome stuff!

Also, to see Rise Casey w/ Ninpo go off. The last few parts or so have been so great, but also, Rise Leo and Donnie and Casey, and 2012 Leo are really going through things. I love the angst, and the badass stuff, but also, poor them!

I am so going to buy the physical versions of ROTP if u can do that. I love having physical stuff of stuff I love. If I can and/or if possible.

I am very excited to see/read TMS (and then Indie way/more later after that) after ROTP is done.

The last two chapters are End Game and Owari. So exactly 2 chapters left, including End Game.

I’m kind of sad too, but I think I’d much rather end it in a nice concise way than draw it out forever. I’m also extremely excited to begin work on TMS and later Indie TMNT, so I have lots to look forward to ^v^

There will be printed copies, yes! I’m still working out how I’m gonna do it, but so far I’ve figured there’ll probably be a way to pre-order them since getting the books printed is VERY expensive, so making sure I’m printing only as many as I need will be best. But, idk, I’ll figure something out :]

Good questions! :]

[suckishima]

kagehina, sakuatsu, yamayachi, kiyoyachi?

Ohhhh so many omg I'll try to keep this concise.

Kagehina: Absolutely makes sense, oddly does not compel me (at least romantically)

I go crazy insane for them as like narrative soulmates, rivals who are obsessed with each other for life. They both have this insatiable hunger for the sport that makes them feed off of each other in this singular way that I can't imagine either of them would ever have with anyone else. Furudate is a genius for the way they intertwine the kagehina relationship, it's so fucking good.

That being said, it's because they compel me so much in that way that they don't really work for me as a typical romantic ship. I totally get why it does work for people though, there's a LOT to work with.

Sakuatsu: Omg don't come for me but uhh, they don't make sense and it does not compel me...

😫 Sorryyy I just don't gett it. They barely speak in canon and I always saw their dynamic as mild at best. And then a lot of the interpretations I see of them in fanon aren't really my personal taste. Also I think my apathy toward them also comes from me being really picky about how Atsumu is characterized in fanon stuff

Yamayachi: Oh yeah this makes sense, but also does not compel me.

It's fine, they're cute. But that's about it for me. It just doesn't go much deeper than that I think and I enjoy them better as friends. Friendship potential HUGE I think tho, I think they'd have a lot to bond over in terms of like, feeling like they're on the outside, and just general anxiety things too. (plus i generally hc yachi as a lesbian and yamaguchi as bi and i always like to imagine them bonding over that when yamaguchi figures his shit out, but i'm pretty loose about how strictly i apply headcanons like that and it's not at all the main factor in not compelling me to them as a ship)

Kiyoyachi: Heyyyy the first makes sense AND compels me! Yay!

Not sure I even need to defend this one lol. SO many scenes, so many. Yachi is in love with her, borderline canon—and attracted to her? even closer to canon lmao. But of course their bond is more than just whatever fledgling crush Yachi probably has in the beginning, theres genuine care and respect and understanding.

The problem is,, and it hurts me, but they compel me the most when they're one-sided.. I think this is mostly bc of how affected I am by canon. I love them, I love them together, but also the potential for angst with them is SO high that I end up not engaging much with them as a pairing bc I don't like to read sad things about characters I love lmao. But then if I read happy fluffy things where they're the main pairing being explored, it sort of just feels, off to me—and while it's nice and cute, it compels me less?? Idk it's weird push and pull. Fanart rather than fic is the perfect happy medium with them for me, I think

Send me ships and I'll talk about whether they compel me!