#I need input from other people
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Does abstracted queenie pass the harkness test
#I mean#she can communicate via body language when calm right#no#she’s too far gone to be completely herself I think#maybe#I need input from other people#tadc#the amazing digital circus#kinger#tadc kinger#queenie#tadc queenie#tadc abstracted queenie au
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I’ve been thinking a lot about what a Hazel and Jason friendship would look like.
Hazel tentatively reaching out after finally understanding that Jason isn’t everything she built him up to be in her head, influenced both by Nico and by what she actually observed of Jason herself
Jason assumes she just wants tips on leadership or maybe how to fight better, so he obliged by offering to train with her
Hazel expects Jason to go easy on her like Percy and Annabeth and Piper do, but instead she gets taken down within a few minutes and has Jason ruthlessly pointing out what things she could improve on.
(Cue: Hazel finally having an opponent who doesn’t underestimate her. Hazel who finally feels like she has somebody she can spar against who will help and not just let her win because she’s young and small. Hazel who finally gets why Nico spends so much time talking about how kind and helpful Jason is, even if what she’s seeing isn’t necessarily kind.)
Jason starts hanging out with Hazel outside of sparring but in other groups, like with Piper, or Nico. He learns that she loves dancing and horses and likes to test the hardness of a stone against her fingernails, likes to collect shiny non-precious things just like Nico does, likes to swear loudly whenever possible as if she’s doing it to purposely piss people off.
Hazel asks Jason if he wants to go hang out one day after the Argo quest is over, maybe go to some museum in NYC that she’s heard Percy talk about, or find metaphysical shops to walk through (I HC that Hazel really loves modern mortal interpretations of magic and that she’s fascinated by the ways mortals accidentally connect to the gods etc.) and Jason assumes she means with someone else and agrees, only to find out they’re going alone.
Jason panicking for a moment about potential misinterpretations, once he realizes, and stammering out some garbled thing about how he really likes her but not like that because ofc all he’s known so far is that being alone with a girl = someone will assume romantic intent. Hazel openly laughs in his face and rather boldly states that she KNOWS Jason is in love with her brother.
Hazel, eventually, being the first person Jason feels safe coming out to. Jason, in return, being the first person Hazel feels safe to talk about being asexual with. The two of them discussing their feelings more and more often while exploring new places together, like Hazel talking about how she did so much researching into queer history and labels when she first found out Nico is gay, Jason telling her that he still doesn’t feel like Thalia is his sister as if he might not be the same Jason Grace she remembers, the two of them coming to terms with being on the aromantic spectrum together.
Jason talking Hazel out of joining the Hunters when she’s having a very very bad day. Hazel stopping Jason from disappearing back out into the mortal world to finish school without first giving his other friends a chance to have input.
(Hazel and Jason inadvertently saving each other’s lives by tweaking fate, thus making their friendship literally woven into their lives forever indisputably. Hades/Pluto patting Jason on the back and telling him thank you with no context or clarification the next time they meet. Hera/Juno, tight lipped and silent, offering Hazel some kind of gift or blessing the next time she returns to New Rome. Hazel and Jason laughing it off when they tell each other because wow, their godly parents are weird as hell.)
#pjo#hoo#jason grace#hazel levesque#I really do think their friendship would be so fun and cool for them#they develop a sibling kinda thing#like yeah Jason still sees her as a little kid sometimes#but she’s HIS little kid sibling and hazel is okay with that because they both know it doesn’t mean he sees her as weak or lesser#idk man people need to hop on this Jason Hazel friendship train I’m digging this shit soooo much#GIGGLING at the idea of Jason casually saying he used to have a crush on Frank and Hazel hitting him with a pillow#they’re gossiping. they’re beating each other up. they’re sharing their deepest darkest secrets.#I’m sure it’s not all happy sparkly rainbows all the time either#like I’m SURE hazel gets pissed off at Jason super easily for shit he does and Jason gets annoyed when Hazel just Decides Stuff without#input from anyone else (Jason does this too but he’s a hypocrite)#like they also. hate each other sometimes but that’s fine. they always figure it out and are friends again before the end of the day#there’s just so much POTENTIAL guys#Percy Jackson and the Olympians#heroes of Olympus#pjato#these are my kids my children
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traditional pencil art is the only form of art that won't have you ripping your hair out trying to make colors interesting in any way. how pure is that
#text#pencils...so pure and innocent....like..like t*****#i'm at the point with my art where i don't need any outside input or editing to get the colors where i want them to be usually -#- but sometimes it still makes me so mad bcos the color pilled tryhard vibe is ingrained into my subconscious#the only way to get “Good” at colors is to be a tryhard and try really hard#being good with colors is literally a nonexistent cloutchaser concept tho .. i lol'd#i say 'i think' a LOT but i rly think that by good colors people usually mean attention grabbing#but isn't that the point ...? (< my good twin talking to me from the mirror)#no...#like wat colors will make random people go 'wow' most which isn't even alldat esoteric-thinking#i'm always artsy elite pilling#i also want to put all people that pair their OCs with t*ldryn sero or just really want him in a battle Royale#and the person that wins gets euthanized#not related#idk... annyway... putting art online ...(chewing) (chewing)that means i'm pondering#there's a lot of love put into my art done with pencils than there is in my digital work#which is flaunty#hmph#all i need in this world to survive is to talk about art in a broad sense as a person that only draws sk*rim twink on ossan action -#- and to talk about the psychology of that twink and ossan. and those 4 who are in civil warfare#other people from that winterland wonder .. idk#Vapid!#the only thing stopping me from entering the 'Twitter artist' mindspace is not adding any recycled filters and overstimulating editing on -#- my spawn#sorry i'm mad cause i sensed the Twitter artist mindspace in me like it was a demon last night while drawing
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Frog! Most likely common water frogs (Pelophylax kl. esculentus)
#they’re also known as green frogs (for… well. obvious reasons. they are very green. not much greener than some other frogs though…)#or edible frogs. because. well. people like eating their legs! still not sure why it’s only the legs. probably not a lot of meat on the rest#of their little bodies…. ANYWAY! bonus points for anyone who noticed that these guys have a three part name rather than a two part name as#most scientific names are! that’s because these guys are a little something named a klepton! which means they need input from another#(usually closely related) species to complete its reproductive cycle!#these ones specifically are fertile hybrids of pool frogs and marsh frogs which is SO COOL for so many reasons#but I’m already. rambling quite a bit here. which while it is the point of having a blog is also making my thumbs Ache. so ! enough of that#for now. I will absolutely talk more if prompted#Featured Creatures#Frogs#Pelophylax kl. esculentus
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I think I'm really gonna try to back off Tumblr for a few days. I'll still very much be around, particularly for conversations and stuff I've been involved with with people, but I'm not gonna be scrolling my dash
#anyway @party @robin I will still be here chatting it up I just feel like I'm doomscrolling too much#and am ruining my enjoyment of things as well as. life. in general#for reasons that I can't really explain other than just. other people being down makes me feel like I have a hard time being Not Down#even if I'm not actually Down as much. or whatever#idk sometimes I just need to pull back from the dash/fandoms/constant input I guess???#but especially @party if you see this I am LIVING for our conversation this week I'm still very much here for that!!!!!#Lu rambles
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Dream of the Endless
So I'm posting something a little different, as this is just a concept sketch at this point and I'm not sure if I should go ahead in making it.
Ever since I saw Dream of the Endless wearing this in the Sandman comics, I've wanted to make something based on it. I spent a lot of time poking and prodding and finally have a concept for a reusable journal cover that I'm happy with.
The black void down the middle would be the spine of the journal.
If you're not familiar with my work, you can see my previous posts where I made Totoro, Hades, and Mass Effect themed reusable journal covers. I quite like this one and think it's perfect for a fan who is familiar with the comic or just as a cool cover design for those that aren't.
However, all those little bits and pieces are going to be a LOT of work to glue down. So I've been hesitating in actually making this into a reality. So I guess I'm posting because I'm looking for...validation? Excitement? Discouragement? Any of those would help me to decide if I should keep pushing forward on this idea or set it aside for another time and place.
If you see this, would you mind giving me your thoughts, good or bad? Thanks!
#the sandman#dream of the endless#bookbinding#journals#fanart#sort of#paste n' paper#this is a weird post#and I might delete it#but I think I just need some input from other people
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what exactly is one supposed to do about accepting things you can't control when the thing you can't control is a person who is actively fucking over many people, including children?
#especially children#like itd not be an issue if the children were not involved. the person would be persona non grata#but the children exist and are involved and we have no legal recourse apparently. so what the fuck. what the fuck#i want to leave. i cant leave. i want to leave#i think id want to leave anyway without this person just bc im sick of this place#but this person makes things 10x worse#the children give me pause bc i do love them but also. maybe this makes me sound shitty. theyre not my repsonsibility#maybe if i can get my own life set up and get stable on my own id try to get the children away from this person#but rn it's not happening#sometimes i think this person had kids to babytrap us into not booting them#honestly i think the law should allow for one free punch#i dont think violence is nec3ssarily the answer for...most things#but some people ....some people need a#need to be socked in the fucking jaw and face tangible consequences for their actions#bc they dont face any consequences otherwise#or at least dont recognize any other consequences as being the direct result of their own selfish dickhead actions#alas. the law is the law#and everything here feels so precarious as it is#it sucks though that 'wanting to control someone else's actions' in this case is i want this person to treat other people fucking decently#and be respectful of their time and the fact that they have their own lives#i get being a parent is hard but to force other people to pick up your slack without any input from them#thereby controlling their lives and fucking them over#and thats just straight up shit behavior. the hardships of parenthood do not justify that#and you barely parent. screaming at kids for being kids is not parenting#and literally nobody made you bring these poor kids into the world. this was 100% your choice#and sure prochoice but honestly people who can choose otherwise having kids when they have to know full well#that they neither have the capacity nor actual desire to actually attempt to parent#they deserve a slap. fuck it. i dont have it in me for compassion#and i have a lot more to say actually that wont fit in the tags. whoops#to the void with love
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i think one thing that anti-theists like.. do wrong (?) is treat religions like they're monoliths, which is impossible. you might find that one denomination is larger than another, but there will pretty much always be other denominations, and varying interpretations within each denomination.
no religion is a monolith, and no religion ever will be one. that's because religion is a personal experience to the individual, who will have their own thoughts and feelings about their faith. that is how people are in regards to everything, because humans aren't a monolith of a species.
i understand it might be confusing, or even frustrating when a religion has many denominations and interpretations, but that doesn't work super well as a reason for wanting to rid of religion. in fact, just yesterday i was told by an anti-theist that 'ideally' the belief of magic would be rid of and traditional religion wouldn't change. i know for a fact that other anti-theists would disagree with that and present their own ideal outcome of anti-theism, because i often browse anti-theism tags to get an understanding of anti-theist beliefs (it's good practice to read up on some opposing opinions to get some standing ground! my dad taught me that.)
it is perfectly okay to be critical of religion, i myself am critical of some religious ideas from varying religions! but when you don't fully understand the religion you're criticizing, and you're getting your information from biased sources, or only reading about limited ideas then you don't have the information to accurately criticize any religion. the idea that all religions are strict monoliths is entirely false, and if someone believes that then their criticism isn't totally credible, especially when they can't acknowledge the good of religion.
in the end, individual religions can not be treated as if they are massive groups of people who all share the same ideas and the same beliefs, harmful or not. because that's literally just not true. if you want to improve religion then actually go forth and try to understand it and listen to different people discuss their religion and it's flaws, trying to get rid of religion will only hurt people. (and i very strongly believe that getting rid of religion will in turn hurt spiritually, and by extension culture.)
#i originally wrote this post in the shower after getting up at 5:15 im barely awake rn this is goinng in the drafts so i can proofread it#nothing that has ever existed has been a monolith 👍 people even have different ideas of how board games are played bro#if you're curious; i'd appreciate it if people could read my other post on anti-theism ♥️#it focuses on how religion; spirituality; and culture are all connected and how getting rid of religion will ultimately hurt-#spirituality and culture- concepts especially important to POC in the modern age (and historically)#to sum up my other post; if you get rid of religion you will hurt spiritual and cultural concepts which will hugely affect POC; and we don't#need to have our beliefs and culture hurt again; no one does whether they are POC or not because white people have still suffered erasure of#their cultures and spiritual beliefs.#ok thanks for reading 👍 its 5:46 am now#OKAY HI it's 4:02 pm ive re-read this and got some input from a friend Yay! we're all good now#anti theism#theism#pro theism#pro religion
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I haven't had much time to write with my new study schedule and family things, and when I do have time I have to wade through a sludge of doubts and fears about my ability to write prose at all, and when I manage to push that aside I often hit locked doors with spoon-shaped keyholes and have no keys for them.
It's frustrating, but I eke out what words I can while working on improving my writing conditions any way I can.
Then I finally have the feeling I can pull off writing some poetry, something I feel even more scared of more often than prose -- but also something I know I won't be able to leave unfinished as easily as prose and will be more likely to create something complete -- and I get a spark of hope.
And I go to compose the poem and my brain hands me what can only be described as an all-emoji recipe for fried eggs and ice cream. Which is not, as far as I know, a poem. Or even the pieces to make a poem. It's simply. Emojis. Vibrant and colorful and wholly unhelpful.
Thank you, brain, but next time I'd like to actually make a poem or story. Please.
#writing#sort of#writing meme#also sort of#not entirely#sonder speaks#I've been studying for slightly over a month#but I don't adapt to these things quickly#I'm the “can only change one thing at a time very slowly” type of autistic I'm afraid#and the balance between input and output of media has been off balance#also my baby niece was born and my sister can't come to our house anymore because the baby is too young to meet a pack of dogs#so I lose out on study time writing time and other home-only activity time when family night happens at my sister's house now#which is fine because I love my sister and my brother in law and my niece#and being at their place is fun#but also the lost time#it kind of gets to me when I just#don't have time to do everything I need and want to do#which is how time and living creatures work I know but it still frustrates me#also yes I know it could've been one of the people living in my brain and not me/my brain that provided emojis#I know there are potential other culprits#but it's simpler to say it was my brain and it all comes from that source anyway#I wish I could write#oh and the brain emojis included#🟨⚪️🧊🧂💨🟧🍏🥶#more or less#which is as mentioned unhelpful#so amy types of things#so badly#I need to take better control of these barriers and issues
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analyzing hermes, emet-selch, the ancients and ascians, how they're written, and the fandom's reaction to them be like hm. emet-selch's role in this fuckery is compounded by the fact that his backstory as a genocide survivor is incongruous with his ruling a huge genocidal colonialist world power in the present da [ANTISEMITISM BLAST]
#ffxiv#ffxiv hermes#emet-selch#i have Posts in Me to write up about the subject but like you can maybe immediately start connecting some dots here lmao#hermes and the ancients lie at the intersection of A Lot of Shit That is Very Important to Me#the vast majority of it having to do with gaslighting in various different forms#one of those posts is going into how his story reminds me eerily of what Questioning Things in an abusive evangelical environment is like#and how the fandom instantly jumping straight to OH SO YOU THINK THE ANCIENTS SHOULD HAVE BEEN GENOCIDED IS THAT IT#YOU THINK THEY SHOULD BE INFANTILIZED AND CIVILIZED BY THE SUPERIOR MORALS OF YOUR OWN CULTURE IS THAT IT#and start throwing around words like 'sympathizer'; if you say 'hermes was right about some shit actually'#'what we see of the ancients' society is full of inexcusably horrific shit which does not get a pass for ~different values~'#smacks strongly to me of evangelical crybullying in the name of Cultural Sensitivity#and how people use 'well it's not my business what other cultures think is right or wrong' as an excuse to throw up their hands and#disengage from actually learning about or supporting the people in those cultures who know and are working within it to fight bigotry#amazingly enough 'racism and misogyny and queerphobia are bad' is not an idea exclusive to western cultures lmfao#your job if you engage is to seek out those people--across the spectrum of opinions and relationships to their culture's issues!#they're not a monolith!--and spread that information; and listen to what they ask of you when they tell you what kind of help they need#but that's complicated; and takes time and care and thought and effort and connecting to marginalized people#talking over activists and victims of the societal issues they live with; and telling them they're the same as colonizers; is easy-peasy#like i cannot stress enough here that hermes Is an Ancient. He Lives Here. He Knows His Society and Thinks About It a Lot#He Wants to Salvage It and is Specifically Fucked Up About Feeling Like He Can't Trust People Around Him for Input#WoL doesn't barge in and start telling the ancients what's what; they find the person who Cares and back him up that he's not crazy or alon#anyway there's a lot here but it is uh. a Lot. the ways in which the game blends up christianity and judaism here.#including the fact that between the two; the default cultural values and dynamics align more with christian associations of Conformity#(the game is by japanese creators and i feel like that's A Factor too; but there are Eerily Accurate evangelical things going on here)#and people cape for the ones who are Most Evangelical about it + the one whose Compelling Aspects are all antisemitic as fuck tropes#whereas the brown guy who grapples with his faith and worldview; who questions and challenges and argues with others in his ethnoreligion#and tries to look for perspective and deeper meaning + Improve Society Somewhat; gets torn apart in the worst faith possible by the fandom#ffxivtag#warning: worm grass
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My friends and I were just having a friendly debate over what counts as a book ( where light novels and manga would lie compared to full novels and stuff) and I realized I'm so tired of such dry, boring conversation starters I.E:
- What's your favorite color
-What your favorite weather
- Do you like cats or dogs
I need help with coming up with more creative conversations to have, like some raw unhinged Tumblr user energy conversations or just 100x more original, interesting, and worth being invested in I:E
do waterfalls ever run out of water who are their supplies?
If your brain had like a video game-level design ( think psychonauts) what would that look like and how would it reflect who you are?
if tacos were living would they ever hatch out of their shells?
Insert any shower thought or random thing to add to a friendly debate
Imagine some guy with like several trench coats on and he just keeps on opening it up
and dnd item, character, etc concept any prompt for a PowerPoint presentation night ( dear friends of mine can we please do this )
#nanamiknowsnothing#tumblr#shower thougts#random conversations#conversation prompts#tumblrpost#help i need ideas#i need input#i just have a lot of random thoughts i want to talk about more but usually people dont want to talk about them because its too weird#or if the do talk they dont try to get invested their just like ok maybe well i guess and dont try to use the yes and rule to add on#i wish there were more people willing to have these convos#part of why i love tumblr is often people love to alk about random unhinged things you wuld hear from the back of the class#yall are all cool i love it here#all other socials are about oh get popular and you have to be perfect but here comes tumblr like hey be you be cool its not about popularit#thank you tumblr#i love you all#it give me so much anxiety of oh what if I'm not cool enough on other platforms and i worried about that when I first joined here
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I think one of my least favorite takes on Optimus annexing Earth is the surprisingly common opinion "he should've just left Earth alone and minded his own business because they didn't ask for help," not because it doesn't have truth in it but because it's a massive oversimplification of the whole situation and seems to pretend that Optimus annexing Earth was just completely stupid and had no reasoning whatsoever.
Like, it just bothers me when people talk about it as if Optimus leaving Earth alone would've been the not-bad-guy thing to do despite the fact that the Decepticons were literally about to try colonizing Earth again under the command of a guy who was literally from the Golden Age generation that made colonizing and genociding organics popular, Galvatron. I mean Galvatron was literally there saying "so when are we going to kill these fleshlings" and even being a Functionist asshole to Soundwave's cassettes. The last time the Decepticons invaded Earth in All Hail Megatron they killed literally a billion human beings. Are there seriously people in this fandom that are out there believing with their whole ass that "Optimus should've just ignored the openly genocidal Decepticons returning to a place they had already tried to colonize just a few years ago because it's none of his business and the humans can handle themselves" like what.
#squiggposting#and this isn't even getting into the fact that like there was that one titan buried under earth's surface#or the enigma of combination being there#are we not going to talk about how bad of an idea it is for cybertronian technology to just be left in the hands of other civilizations#with no supervision or input from cybertron whatsoever#there was an entire fucking tyrest accord made specifically to ban cybertronians from sharing their tech with other races#which megatron broke btw when he spread mind controlling guns across earth specifically to cause chaos#like i'm not saying that the sentiment of 'they didn't ask for help to be forced upon them' isn't valid#but i feel like saying 'lol optimus should've just not gotten involved' is incredibly naive at best and stupid at worst#ppl will be like 'noooo idw op is evil because he annexed earth he's not a real OP he's shittily written'#bro optimus was following one of his most core personality traits which is trying to protect innocent lives#from the imperialistic factions of his own species. the fuck do you people mean that idw op sucks#is it bc one of his positive character traits was turned into a double edged sword that also makes him flawed and make mistakes#and you just wanted OP to be your unproblematic g1 daddy who never does anything wrong?#i need to do a reread of barber's side of phase 2 to cement my opinion and remember the exact sequence of events#but mfs act as if optimus doing that had no reasons behind it whatsoever and as if he had any good choices in that scenario#(then there is the sub faction of idw op haters who kiss idw megs' ass simultaneously but that's a rant for another day lol)#mostly what gets me isn't the fact that people don't like optimus' decision#but the fact that so many ppl completely disregard and refuse to consider the context around that decision#and they just go 'oh he just sucks' as if that's the end of the story lol
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ok so i mightve made a new character thats actually interesting but i dont have a name for them so im sharing the design and my plan.
(TW: There is blood and the character has an aspect that makes them look creepy, both are these are not in the main form though)
So, first of all, the design:
Despite this being the normal form, I made this after the other form. Anyways, this is a classic case of someone looking nice but actually being psychotic, but to be fair, I love characters that do that. Anyways², of course the hairstyle is based on Hatsune Miku, because I thought it'd be funny if the character liked them (dangit socks youre rubbing off on me). Also, the wings and halo are supposed to look angelic, it helps them look nicer, although the wings don't work and the halo can actually cut you because...
...the wings are broken and the halo is a crown of thorns. They also have a third eye, which if you looked close enough, you can actually see it in the first image. Obviously, there are also designs on the shirt, upper arms, and around the neck, which I envision as dark runes that help him control his power, which is having an area become "inverted" and wrong, with spirits and demons visible, as well as this form coming out. Oh yeah, good time to mention that he's a guy, since I needed more than a Meowscarada that's misgendered constantly and a wood elf. No clue what sexuality he'd be, maybe you guys can help out with that.
As for personality traits and how he talks, I kinda want him to act a bit lustful, or at least talk in a similar vain (like ending sentences with a ~ kind of speech), and then be my most psychopathic character in the "Inverted" form. Something like Toy Chica in Ultimate Custom Night I guess? (Like when she says stuff like "Where's my beak~? Lodged in your forehead of course!")
I'm gonna need to flesh out the character some more, I might make them part of/a leader of a cult or something, and of course a name, so if you guys have an idea for new things, suggestions to change some things up (the design is staying though), or any criticisms, go ahead and give me them! (Please I'm begging you /j)
Picrew link for this character: https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/711597
#pixels lore#i think itll be fun if a character of mine had an input from other people#since usually the first time someone hears about a character of mine ive already finished it#also i needed to share this design because i love it so much
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as ever like: no two things Need to be juxtaposed, much less like material vs material deathmatch Only One Can Be Good, much less am i thinking i have thee objective word on fuckall b/c who does and it's like perfectly boring & unserious whenever someone just throws out Takes that are just "i think...[xyz] is [adjective]" like okay.
but anyways thinking of how, though differing in execution in a lot of ways ofc, deh & bmc start out in a v similar place & explore a journey to self-acceptance from a despairing starting point....it feels like a lot of the hindrance in deh's exploration of its own Theme there is in like, hey. :) hand on your shoulder. it's okay b/c you'll be able to be more normal. whereas w/bmc it's that it's okay b/c you'll be able to be more abnormal
#like hell yeah. and Normality is fake the way that things like Gender is fake so. what's more universally relevant here#versus like. the idea that a winning takeaway re: deh is Talking With Your Parents / Kid like#yeah that could be an improvement? in other situations; that Talking is dangerous &/or just not going to happen / be irrelevant#meanwhile nobody is ''normal'' & the idea of Normality & its Moral Goodness / Requirement does affect everyone#meanwhile that bmc is clear on jeremy's gaining supportive relationships means support for his relationship w/himself#whilest he's also able to feel better insulated from feeling Defined by whatever instance of feedback/input#whereas with deh it's like. All These People....but log off & all you need is at least one parent who doesn't hate you No Matter What#including your unfortunate abnormality....Just(tm) make the phone calls am i right? well now he at least has a part time job#meanwhile difficult to compare w/e's going on w/zoe/evan vs mpdg4mpdg jeremy/christine. latter are cute & a coherent relationship#former are [nothing] to [i'm taking psychic damage] & fuck if i know what's going on besides The Ultimate Romance(tm) (negative)#he was a boy she was a girl they could politely tolerate each other's presence. maybe forever :')#i really don't know what's supposed to be going on there so like. for real share Any reasons you like each other in Either love song abt it#anyways like No Need To Compare but for me the juxtaposition is natural b/c it Does feel like they can be looked at re: a v similar Essence#but one is fumbling around w/it & really Not sticking the landing especially while the other just does exactly what it's trying to do#and ofc it could only help that deh had to go so far from the original [???] ideas & more Farcical approach#vs i don't think bmc's envisioning ever changed so fundamentally along its development at any point#like deh's story does feel like it still has the remnants of the earlier farcier versions even in its bway form#story of A Bunch Of Wild Shit Happens To Our Protag Whaaat & sure ppl are humanized but you still never made room for like a quarter of the#alana & jared? they're alright but they died#anyways & in all these things it's like It's Not A Big Deal lol i am not here to strive to have thee true & final word#right tf on if you as well know them both & like deh more / think It was the more successful execution of its story#though i have natural enemies like say [trt loyalists who are Like That] or forever [deh haters who are Like That]....we're different#erased a tangent also mentioning how i like the Parent Approach of mr. heere's arc better than any parents in deh lol. like of course#it's Not about his Feelings or being Imperfect or Human. like ofc he has the feelings & is human & imperfect#but he just gets energized & focused like welp bummer but ofc i gotta give my kid more support w/whatever he's going through rn#like hell yeah. one fun song we're good to go#bmc#deh
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God I wish I had someone to nerd out over art with
#my posts#jibba jabba#I could nerd out to the bf but he's busy today and he wouldn't have the kind of input I would like out of a discussion#like it's less about just talking about something and more like I need art bud to art talk with#also a writing one would be cool too#god I just need to branch out in general#drifted away from a lot of my old pals and haven't had too many people to have deep talks about in awhile#slowly making friends within my bf's circle but I need others too#thought about chatting with my ex's friends since we're still friends but god his discord is pretty much voice only and I anxious#I either like to know people in person first or just text before I warm up to them#one's like wading in the ocean the other is wading into the pool#vc from the get go is like diving into the deep end of the pool
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#idk whether i find my dad's refusal to see me as a functioning adult to be mostly cute or mostly obnoxious#cos it's like...i moved out from my parents' place in mid-2014. i've been living an 11h(-ish) drive from their place since then#so i've been managing w/o their constant presence & direct input for over a decade. and i've done so reasonably well#like i've always paid my rent and bills on time and i've learned how to cook and clean and do basic home repairs and i've never--#--made any choices that put my own or other people's well being and/or safety at risk#in other words there's absolutely no reason why my parents (mostly my dad) should doubt my ability to deal with--#--normal everyday life-things and to figure out solutions when a problem arises#yet when the time came to change to winter tyres on the car my dad insisted on making the fucking 11h drive TO DO IT FOR ME#and for context: there's a mountain pass separating my home ''town'' aka where my parents live from where i live#and that mountain pass is snowy and miserable and lowkey dangerous to cross by car this time of year#and i was just like dude i can change my own fucking tyres and if i for some reason decide that i can't--#--then i'll just get the pros to do it? you don't have to drive all that way to do it for me like i'm still 18 and just got my license?#but no he made the drive and changed the tyres for me and would barely even LET ME HELP. like i just stood there and handed him--#--the tools like i was 8 years old again BUT at one point i was allowed to tighten the bolts on one of the wheels:)#except not really cos as soon as i was done he went over them to check that i'd done it properly#and don't get me wrong he's not an overbearing man at all. he's not a besserwisser. he tends to stay back and let me live my life#it's just when it comes to things that could in theory pose a threat to my safety or general well-being--#--that he decides that uhhh actually you're still 13 years old as far as i'm concerned and i need to do my fatherly duty here#makes me think of when i went home last year to spend a few days there and both my parents were like--#--wait wtf do you mean you know how to operate a washing machine#and i was kinda just like.....bro what#what exactly do you people think i've been doing with my laundry for the last almost-decade#and don't even get me started on when they realised i knew how to cook#again: my dad is not overbearing and neither is my mum. they're generally very laid back and always have been#and i love them and i'm so grateful for everything they have done and continue to do for me#but also holy shit i'm almost 30 years old and somehow they remain baffled that i'm not still the 19yo that moved out in 2014
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