#I need Loki breaking down because how shitty everyone is to him and Thor not knowing what to do | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

occasionalfics · 4 years ago

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touch every star (2)

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Pairing: Thor X Cinderella!Reader AU

A/N: To those who are reading, thank you! I’m so glad y’all are liking this 💖 Feel free to comment and message me with thoughts if you’d like!

Warnings: Lots of angst, a really, really shitty boss, but overall this is probably the most pure fic I’ve ever written?

Words: 2,643

You’re cordially invited to Stark Industries’ Annual Christmas Extravaganza/Charity Gala. Donations optional, but appreciated.

She stared at the email, blinking mindlessly at it for at least three minutes. She’d never been invited to one of these galas before - she figured it was because she was just a secretary and couldn’t afford to make a donation for a charity gala.

But this year, she was on the list. She checked the addresses and CCs and, yup, this email had been personally sent to her. Personally - but most likely from an automated system. Still, hers was the only email listed to be sent to. Someone had put her email in there on purpose (or maybe an accident, but still...she was invited).

She wondered what she’d wear. She didn’t have anything black tie, didn’t have time or money to go shopping. Maybe Nat would have something. Or Wanda, but more than likely, Nat.

She couldn’t go, though. Could she? A secretary from the Accounting offices? Did she mean anything? Enough to be invited to the holiday gala?

Apparently, yes. She knew Nat and Wanda would insist on her going. Her two best friends were kind of like her fairy godmothers. They watched out for her whenever she needed them, encouraged her whenever she felt unsure or insecure, and promised to help her wherever they could. She’d done the same for them, but she was far less well off than they were.

After all, Nat was literally a model and Wanda was making a name for herself as a successful up and coming photographer. Y/N was just a secretary.

As if to remind her of that fact, Jasper Sitwell was suddenly standing in front of her desk. He cleared his throat and glared down at her, one eyebrow raised over the thick rim of his glasses.

“Are you going to sit there motionless all day or are you going to get to work?” he asked.

Man, she hated him. But he’d drilled into her head that he could ruin her with a simple few words. He’d told her nothing if not that he was in charge of her while she was on the clock, and if she didn’t do everything he asked, she’d be out on the street before she could make it to the lobby.

She moved immediately, picking up the papers from the night before to sort through them. “Sorry, Mr. Sitwell,” she muttered, starting piles across her desk for different people throughout the office.

“I saw you stayed late last night,” he said, a little less abrasive but just as cool. “Got everything done?”

She nodded. “Yes, Mr. Sitwell.”

“Good.” She looked up at him in time to see him pull out two sheets of paper, which he placed in her inbound box on the corner of her desk. “I want all of this finished on time today.” With that, he walked into his office without so much as a second glance.

She sighed. The list from yesterday had been one page, single spaced, and it had still taken her almost twelve hours to complete. She’d skipped taking a lunch break and ate while she’d worked, too.

She could only imagine how long this list would take. But first, she still had to sort through the papers from last night and deliver them correctly.

---

Thor had taken bits of pieces of his conversation with Frigga to heart. Just the parts that weren’t directly set up to make him feel guilty for having a high-energy, fast-paced job.

He knew he had to take care of himself. Better care, anyway. He knew he couldn’t sustain twelve and thirteen-hour workdays forever. And, as annoying as Frigga’s nagging about him starting a family was, he did want to start a family.

He wanted a partner he could come home to, in all senses of the word. Someone kind and generous, that he could care for as much as they cared for him. A true partner. As much as he respected his parents’ relationship, he didn’t want what they had. He wanted something better.

And as he thought on that, his mind drifted to the girl from last night. It was silly of him to imagine her in that spot, given he literally didn’t even know her name, but he couldn’t help himself. Thor’d always been something of a Romantic - even in his college Frat years, he’d imagined a future with a real human, whereas most of his Brothers just wanted easy lays and Trophy Wives.

Loki had always poked his side for stuff like that. But Loki was Loki, and it was hard to know exactly what his idea of a perfect home might be one day.

Thor was thinking of that girl when Tony Stark himself made an appearance in his office. Normally, Tony called people to him, not the other way around, but they both knew Thor was a special circumstance. They were part of a little group of directors and executives - friends, really - so it wasn’t so much of a surprise to Thor that Tony was interrupting his daydream with a pristine white envelope.

“Most people got invites through their email, so appreciate my efforts to come down here. But this year, thanks to Steve, everyone is invited.”

Thor smiled and took the envelope, and despite knowing what was inside, opened it. The annual holiday gala was always a charity event, so usually it was their little group and the board of directors mingling with some celebrities and the like. People with lots of money. Not because Tony didn’t appreciate every one of his employees, really, though Thor didn’t know why this was the first year everyone in the company was included.

“I think that’s a good thing,” Thor said. “Steve’s got some good ideas, you know.”

Tony completely ignored that. He perched himself on one of the chairs facing Thor’s desk and, in his cool and unaffected tone, asked, “So you gonna bring someone? It’s a masquerade this year, you know. Gotta bring a hot date and lose her in the crowd or...some such nonsense.”

He laughed at that, but shook his head. “You know I’m not seeing anyone this year.”

“Oh good because, with so many new people there, you’ll be just single enough to pick someone up.”

“You’re as bad as my mother,” Thor said. “Did you know that?”

Tony gave him one of those half-smiles, like he’d expected Thor to say as much. “You’re not the first to say so, believe it or not. That I sound like your mother.”

They laughed together, and it took Thor a moment to realize how long it’d been since he’d seen his friends. Too long. They were all busy people but they all worked at the same company, for the same man who was in their group and sitting directly across from him at that very moment.

A gala would be nice. And maybe Tony was right.

After all, if everyone was invited, maybe Elevator Girl would show up. The only problem was that he didn’t know anything about her except that she worked on his floor and that he could recall what she looked like. A mask - kind of required for a masquerade - would make it that much harder for him to find her.

Tony sighed. “Anyway. I’m sure you’re busy - what’d you call it? - ‘protecting our asses’ and all, so I’ll leave you to it. Maybe one day this week we’ll do lunch.” His eyebrows rose expectantly, and Thor hesitantly nodded.

“Maybe.”

“I’ll have my people call your people.”

And with that, he was gone.

---

She managed to finish before six, but well after five. The list was complete - thankfully, most of the tasks Sitwell had left were short or easy to do - and the office was empty, so she sighed and slipped her heels off. The blisters were worse today, but she’d thought ahead and brought a pair of plain flats to change into for the walk/ride home.

As she came up to the elevator, she couldn’t help but look from one end of the hall to the other. There were more people around than the night before, but not the man she was looking for.

The man from last night.

Y/N knew she shouldn’t be thinking about him. She didn’t know anything about him, other than he took the elevator from her floor. Once.

But he’d been nice last night, and he hadn’t done anything at all to warrant her running. If anything, she wanted to be able to apologize for scampering away like a deer in headlights because it hadn’t been polite. Even if she didn’t owe him an explanation, she wanted the chance to give one anyway.

He didn’t show, though. She figured he’d already gone home or something, because the elevator doors opened and no one stepped out onto her floor or anything. The four people already on the elevator looked at her expectantly, so she got on and turned to face the doors without a word.

No one attempted conversation. Hardly anyone moved. Two more people squeezed in before they hit the lobby, then everyone rushed out and onto the street.

Her ride home was just as lonely. No one on MTA ever stopped to talk, except the buskers and musicians that, at least tonight, avoided her car.

She shouldn’t have taken it personally. No one ever talked to her on the subway because it was New York - everyone kept to themselves and that was how the city worked. She’d never thought twice about it, but something about missing that man - the dashingly handsome man she’d spent all of ten minutes with tops - made her feel heavy as she stepped up onto the street again.

She bit her tongue as she turned a corner to head up her block. She wasn’t going to cry. She couldn’t. It was stupid to cry over nothing like this. If she were upset about Sitwell or something, she’d let herself do it, but right now she was sad about...nothing at all. A missed opportunity.

She knew what would make her feel better. Her mind drifted to the email from this morning. Maybe it was silly, but the reminder of that invitation did make her feel better. Had her walking taller, shoulders back, teeth biting into her bottom lip to keep from smiling.

Oh, she wanted to go to the gala. Donation or no, she was determined. Maybe she’d meet the man from the elevator again, or maybe she’d met the Tony Stark. She’d read the email back six times over the day, so she knew full well that it was a masquerade, but she was still excited.

So excited that Nat could tell something was up the second she stepped through the door. And Nat, being relentless and stubborn, managed to convince Y/N to sit on the couch and spill all the details she had in absolutely no time.

“Holy shit,” Nat said when she’d finished. “You never get invited to Stark parties!”

“I mean, I’m not on the board or an heiress or anything so I get it,” she responded, shrugging. “Some of my coworkers think it’s basically an open invitation this year.”

“And it’s a masquerade!” Nat practically squealed, which made Y/N even more excited than she already had been.

Y/N nodded, the tiniest bit of embarrassment seeping into her joy. She cleared her throat before she said, “I, uh. Kinda need help finding something to wear.”

Nat stood up so quickly she nearly toppled over. But she was lithe and graceful - a former dancer - so she caught herself quickly and turned toward her bedroom.

“Where’re you going?” Y/N asked, trying to follow with her eyes.

“Getting my bag and shoes - we’re going shopping!”

Wanda appeared at that. She asked what all the noise was about, and before Y/N could even attempt to resist or refuse, Nat was back and informed her of everything. Between the two of them, Y/N knew there was no way she’d get out of this.

Nat texted someone as she headed for the door. She sent the message, then looked up at Y/N with a smirk and nodded for Wanda to join them.

“Where’re you going?” Y/N asked.

“We,” Nat answered. “And it’s not even eight. Most stores are still open, but I’ve got an in at one in particular.”

---

“I don’t know,” she murmured, moving the skirt around. “It seems like a lot.”

“Babe, you’re going to a black tie charity gala,” Wanda said. “It’s all gonna be a lot.”

She looked at her reflection and sighed for the millionth time. The dress was gorgeous, she couldn’t deny it. Deep cut and embellished, the soft material flowed around her in light floral patterns and it all made her feel…

Well, she knew what she should feel. She should see her reflection and think Princess, but that had never described her. Nat and Wanda were the only ones in her life that looked at her and saw more than she did, so it didn’t surprise her that they liked the dress.

And she liked it, too. Loved it, actually. The dress itself was amazing, but on her… She couldn’t help but think she was dragging it down. Or, as a consultant on Say Yes to the Dress might say, the dress was wearing her, not the other way around.

“You look hot,” Nat said, standing to walk around the stool Y/N was perched on. “This color is perfect for your skin tone and I have a headband that would go so well.”

“I need a mask,” she responded. She said it like...like it was an excuse not to buy this dress. As if a mask couldn’t be found or made to match it.

Her friends, however, were not going to let her leave empty handed. And they both loved this dress. The last two had gotten nods of approval, but not like this. Not warranting both Nat and Wanda standing at her sides, watching the mirror with her, both moving the skirt around with smiles.

“I’ll take care of the mask,” Wanda said. “You should get this dress.”

“I’m only gonna wear it once-”

“Or we can find you another event to wear it to. Or one of us will wear it next.”

“Exactly,” Nat said. “So, really, what’re you scared of?”

“The price-”

“We’ll help.” Wanda smiled softly, and before Y/N could attempt to deny the offer, she held a hand up. “We want to help. Besides, if we put in some money that gives us more incentive to want to wear the dress so we can all get a use out of it, right?”

“It’s too nice for me.”

“That’s just a blatant lie,” Nat said. “Y/N, you look fucking amazing. We should all get this dress. You’ll just be the first one to wear it.”

She did have to admit to herself that that sounded...fair. Maybe not conventional, but fair. Fair enough that she could hold herself a little higher, stretch her neck a little longer and really see what her friends were seeing. Once she stopped questioning whether she was worthy of such a dress and just enjoyed being in it, she could see herself walking into the gala in it, the hem flowing around her heels as all eyes turned on her. No one would know who she was unless they worked with her, and even then, she’d be wearing a mask.

She’d look mysterious. Pretty. Sexy, even.

Like Nat, who’d have to have the dress taken in a little after Y/N and Wanda wore it, but she probably knew people for that, too.

“So?” Wanda asked.

Y/N couldn’t help but smile. “Okay. Let’s do it.”

#thor fanfic #touch every star fic #touch every star #cinderella au #thor x reader #thor odinson x reader

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the-irish-mayhem · 4 years ago

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Fosterson Fic Rec Masterlist: Oneshots

The Main Reclist has been split to fix the links that tumblr decided to break if there were too many of them in a single post. I’ll be keeping the main reclist updated (even if the links appear broken) as well as maintaining this list and the list for multichapters.

I need help expanding this list! If you have any favorites or fics of your own of your own you don’t see included in this list and you’d like to submit for consideration, please drop me a line.

List updated April 2020. New additions marked with **

Updated during this wild quarantined time, which should serve as a reminder to everyone to APPRECIATE YOUR CONTENT CREATORS! Leave all the comments and kudos to show our love for everything they do. Big thanks to everyone who recommended and/or created content for this amazing ship.

Rated G/K-K+

**Promise by igi_pigi: Thor visits Jane to say goodbye before he leaves for Asgard. Rec: Bittersweet but lovely post-AOU, semi AU pre-Ragnarok. | 1.1k

**Spooky Nights by igi_pigi: "So what is it about?" Thor asks. "Or are we to go in uninformed?"Jane's eyes instinctively flick towards the blank tv screen. Darcy was insistent about it being a horror movie this time - as they serve as "perfect romance fodder", according to the maniac. Jane has decided to go with the recent one, 'The Conjuring'. [Set a few months after Thor2] Rec: Just sweet, dumb, wonderful fluff. Not an ounce of angst to be found. Also Thor learning about Earth is always sweeeeet. | 3.2k

**Stars and Solitude by igi_pigi: It's Jane's first night in Thor's home, however unusual the circumstances. He wishes to show her somewhere. She thinks it's his room. [Set during Thor2] Rec: A nice lil add on, Thor inviting Jane further into his life. | 3.3k

**Can’t Go Back the Same Way You Came by gumbridge: Loki lets go. This is what happens after. (post-film; basically a fixit fic.) Rec: This is pretty Loki-centric, but Jane is fabulously written, the family unit that Loki gets inducted into makes me very happy, and the fosterson is understated but so important and wonderful. | 20k

**spring will come by LadyCharity: As if grieving over the death of her husband wasn't hard enough, Jane has to deal with Thor's angry, bitter, emotionally shot little brother. Rec: This is literally all pain but god it is so good. You can feel the love binding Jane and Loki and Thor and it is so, so well written. Holy shit. | Content Warning: Major Character Death | 12k

the universe in your hand by amonkeysue: For the free day of Fosterson Week 2019, Thor's finally taking the right chance to propose to Jane. Rec: an adorable little bite-sized proposal fic. | <1k

Who Lives, Who Dies by MissChrisDaae: When the dust settles, who is left? Rec: Post-Infinity War, semi-kidfic. Pretty cute, and brings Jane into the story like she should’ve been. | 1.2k

Morning by MissChrisDaae: Thor and Jane's morning is interrupted by their kids. Rec: Fluffy fluffy FLUFFY Jane and Thor with a whole gaggle of children. | <1k

Trending by MissChrisDaae: Jane and Darcy's work session gets a little derailed. Rec: For the Social Media day of Fosterson Week, a fluffy and silly bit, and feeds into the 2012 Avengers Fic nostalgia. | <1k

ever on and on by often_adamanta: Darcy has to correct three separate people at the reception about their relationship, not younger cousin or sister, but college professor and boss and finally best friend. Jane thinks about their surprise, the second glances they give her, and wonders. Rec: Jane deals with the implications of immortality. Her friendship with Darcy is so potent and real in this. | 3k

Before the Thunder Shook Us by niobium: #6, “Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?” #14, “Hey, I’m with you, okay? Always.” Rec: This is such a wonderful canon-insertion/canon divergence. Just enough fluff and bittersweetness to seem real. | 1k

Private Jokes by MissChrisDaae: Before his return to Asgard, Thor and Jane have a talk. Two years later, Thor misses a chance and Jane has to carry on. Rec: An AOU coda and a Ragnarok fix-it all in one. Feisty Jane and apologetic Thor. My bbs. | 1k

On the Physics of Magical Space Hammers by shinyopals: ‘So what does it mean to be “Worthy”?’ Jane asked. Jane doesn't mind sharing her life with Mjolnir. She just wishes she understood it a bit better. Rec: We’ve all wondered about Mjolnir and worthiness. Jane finally takes the initiative to find out with amazing results. | 4k

Fives Times Jane and Thor Broke Up and One Time They Didn’t by shinyopals: I didn’t know you were in the country, Jane,’ said Jane's grandmother. ‘Of course, nobody tells me anything.’ ‘It’s just a very last minute thing,’ said Jane, which Thor knew to be a lie. ‘I only arrived yesterday-’ another lie, ‘and I’m just on the way to work and thought I’d stop by and see Mom.’ This too was not true. ‘This is my friend Thor,’ she added, almost casually. ‘He’s been helping me with some work so we’re driving into the university together.’ This seemed the most flagrant of all the lies, but Thor decided not to let it show. It's not always convenient to be a relationship, so sometimes Jane and Thor have to make sacrifices. Rec: A giant SUCK ON THIS FEIGE that takes the “Jane and Thor break up” concept to the best possible places. | 12k

Hours Long and Short by shinyopals: The first night, Thor does not sleep. (Written for a post-TDW prompt for Fosterson Week 2017.) Rec: A really wonderful slice of life fic post-TDW. Deals with their trauma so wonderfully, and includes some lovely soft moments. | 4k

#7Days7Hobbies by shinyopals: Thor wants to try out some of Midgard's finest hobbies and turns to Twitter for suggestions. Jane isn't really sure how this is now her life. (Prompt for Day 4: Domestic, for Fosterson Week 2017.) Rec: One of my favorite things that’s ever been submitted for Fosterson Week. I love reading about Thor fully embracing Earth customs, particularly social media, which opal KNOWS is one of my weaknesses. | 5k

A Question of Honor by shinyopals: ‘Paintball?’ said Steve. ‘We could do… that…’ ‘What is that?’ asked Thor. He nuzzled into Jane’s hair. His mead-breath was giving her a headache. ‘It’s a thing- a game… thing. With paint.’ ‘Rogers, stop explaining stuff to Thor, you’re embarrassing me.’ Tony’s voice was remarkably coherent. Must have been drinking sensibly. Bastard. When it comes to deciding whether Earth or Asgard has better warriors, the stakes are high, and Jane is wishing she'd kept her big mouth shut. Rec: TEAM BUILDING EXERCISES FOR THE WIN. | 8k

The Gift Horse by fartherfaster: Sam and Darcy are formally introduced for the first time. Sam says “formally” with some flexibility. And a couch. A couch and a great deal of flexibility. Nevermind, he’s said enough. They met, is what he’s trying to say. Or, Sam's early days with the whole gang. Rec: Mostly a teamfic from Sam Wilson’s POV, which is awesome because how often do you see that. Fosterson is mostly background, but it made me smile so much. | 3k

on the verge of understanding something extraordinary by dirgewithoutmusic: “Jane, you’re an astrophysicist, not a storm chaser,” said Erik Selvig, and he was wrong. She was just an astrophysicist too. (A Jane Foster character study) Rec: I’m relatively certain I read this before and loved it, only it somehow didn’t make the reclist. An amazing, touching, wonderful, stunning portrait of Jane Foster. | 9k

starlight in her eyes by jdphoenix: “You,” she says, voice strong with accusation. “You’re the one who attacked me!” Thor really must laugh at that. “You are the one who attacked me. Or is it considered polite among stars to crash into one another?” Rec: A really awesome take on a Stardust fusion AU. Full of inquisitive Jane and cocky Thor. It gave me really hard vibes from the first Thor film. | 1.2k

a true lady of Asgard by jdphoenix: It's not uncommon for Jane to fall asleep working when she's chasing a new theory or hunting down evidence but the middle of a battle for the future of Asgard is not the time. Rec: Jane becoming a fixture of sorts in Asgard is one of my kinks. Also Jane being friends with Thor’s friends and the people of Asgard. Kink. | 3.5k

Afterwit by RC_McLachlan: Good with patients, bad with relationships. That's what she told Thor before she ripped the name tag from the shirt in his hands and crumbled it in her palm, relishing the way the sticky back clung to her skin before she threw it in the waste bin. She'd never been so right in her life up to that point—the rightest she's ever been was when she decided to offer the crazy blond guy a ride to his mysterious non-satellite in the desert. Or, the one in which Jane and Thor run into Donald Blake. Rec: I am such a sucker for the “running into the shitty ex with the New and Improved Partner” trope and this is that. All of that to such a wonderful degree. | 2.7k

drabbles by freshexes: Rec: Some really fantastic little bits of prose. Great voices of Thor and Jane. Some fluffies, some angst. | 1k

The Good Times are Killing Me by alwaysaprilia: Rec: Modern royals AU. Jane and Thor are perfect in this. The dialogue is sublime, and the interactions made me squee really hardcore. I only wish there was more. | 3.6k

College AU by anthropologicalhands: Rec: It’s kinda more meta/heacanon, but it’s really adorable. | 1k

all’s fair (in love and war) by sweetwatersong: This is what you fight for. This is what you yearn to feel: this moment, this passing of every second, this rush of life and the indomitable strength of the present. Thor is a warrior, born and bred, and he is glad of any battle - and yet, as with all things, even this can change. Rec: A Thor introspect and a really well done second person perspective. | 1k

Five Times Thor Gets His Shirt Off FOR GREAT JUSTICE And One Time He Doesn’t by shinyopals: Sometimes Thor’s armour is more useful when not being worn by him. He definitely doesn’t end up in these situations on purpose. Rec: Please bury me in every single five times fic shinyopals has written. This one might be my absolute favorite. So many fantastic interactions for Thor, not just with Fosterson (which is BEYOND perfect), but the whole team. Plus: naked Thor fighting bad guys in an apron. Also the SamSteve is so strong and I’m in love. | 9.8k

A Discussion of Hypotheticals by shinyopals: Jane and Thor talk about their future. Hypothetically. Rec: I am so glad we’ve made Fosterson Week a thing because this fic is WONDERFUL. Great communication makes me weak, and also so many squee-worthy moments. | 5k

Jane Foster Versus the Internet. Or: Five Times Jane Allegedly Dated An Avenger And One Time She Apparently Did Not by shinyopals: Jane discovers that the internet is The Worst. Rec: It’s the thing I loved so much I made graphics for it because it’s so good. Jane’s interactions with all the Avengers are delightful, not to mention her steady relationship with Thor that is so grounded and real. It’s also freaking hilarious. | 10.4k

Untitled by polyamoryavengers: Rec: Angst and fluff and Jane comforting Thor. *cartwheels into the sun* | 1k

Sexiest ‘Something’ Alive by Niobium: Tony is bound and determined to make sure a human is awarded the title of Sexiest Man Alive (he even has a solid candidate in mind); Jane just wants media outlets to get their science right. Rec: This is absolutely fantastic. Just the right kind of blend of humor, sweetness, and meta criticism ever. | 7.5k

The Hours Filled by websandwhiskers: Ritual and comradery are basic human needs. Rec: Focus on Jane, not a ton of Thor, but pregnant Jane is always a delight. | 1.7k

First Dates? by hariboo: Jane’s not really sure what her and Thor’s first date is? The party or the barbecue? In end does it matter? Rec: I am not a big fan of high school AUs, but if they float your boat, this is definitely worthwhile. | 1.4k | Part of Let’s Be Young Forever series

Of Car Crashes and Coffee by hariboo: “you bumped my car and I’m so piss- oh wow no you’re hot let’s go for a coffee” au prompt. Exactly what it says on the tin. Rec: This made me giggle. Super duper cute. | 1.3k

Tactile Perception by RC_McLachlan: “The day I met you, I knew you would see me.” Her hands find his face, sliding over his jaw, his cheeks, and she brings their foreheads together. “The day I met you, I hit you with my car. Twice.” Rec: *dies quietly* Teasing and cute story telling and just so many good things. | 2k

Clarke’s Third Law by shinyopals: “Of all the people to knock down the stairs, she would pick the practically-seven-foot-tall son of the Minister for Magic who just happens to be the Gryffindor Quidditch Captain.” Jane’s just trying to read every single book in the Hogwarts library in between classes, and she’s not quite sure how Thor happened to her. Rec: I never read Harry Potter but damn it this makes me want to. I just love this. So much. I don’t know how but it happened. I actually really wish there was more? | 3.8k

The Most Daring Prophecies–Dr Jane Foster at TED Talk by Rozilla: A transcript of Jane giving a TED Talk on her experiences of crossing the cosmos, Asgard and her hopes for the future of interstellar travel - as reported on WHIH. Rec: I can’t tell you how badly I wanted this to be real. Fosterson is mentioned a bit, and it makes me smile a lot. | 5.1k

Paradigm Shift by jdphoenix: “Jane’s implementing a ‘new organizational paradigm.’ She does this like once a year, usually when she’s extra stressed. Like after that time your brother messed up NYC.” Rec: cute domestics plus Jane is worthy. | 1.5k

Raging Storm by jdphoenix: Thor knows the moment he touches the hammer that it is not Mjolnir. Rec: A brilliant continuation of Paradigm Shift (above, previously recced) wherein Jane bests Loki and is worthy, plus Jane talking down berserker!Thor. So many of my Fosterson hot buttons. | 4k

Overlap by littlestardust: A moment between Thor and Jane. Alternative summary: Thor is respectful of Jane’s life choices, and also there is cuddling. Rec: Teeny tiny fic, but super cute. | <1k

amazed & confused by tashlae: Dating an alien/god/man who fell from the sky isn’t something to take lightly. Rec: Jane/Darcy centric with lots of talk about fosterson and a kinda sweet moment at the end. | 1k

untitled by ifilovedyouless: jane/thor, modern royals. Rec: Oh my god, the sweetness overload was too much. Also YAS Thor in military uniform. | 1k

Fosterson - dancing by batsonthebrain: Rec: Introspective, sweet, and with a heavy dose of mutual respect. | <1k

Unplanned by hariboo: The first person to hear Jane is pregnant isn’t Thor. It should be, but extenuating circumstances. This happens a lot when it comes to living in Stark Tower. Rec: Very much toeing the crack line. Baby!fic, obviously, plus fabulous Clint, and a semi?redeemed Loki. | 1.2k

clash of the (scientific) titans by anthropologicalhands: Thor brings Tony to meet Jane. Thor admits he probably could have thought it through a little better. Rec: this fic always makes me giggle. Fosterson is mostly background, but the interactions between everyone makes this worth it. | 1k

Through Doors by nayanroo: The Jedi Order knows a good team when they see it, but unfortunately even the best-planned missions always have something go hilariously wrong. That’s when the true strength of any bond is shown. Rec: A Star Wars fusion is always a good idea. The way Jane and Thor play off each other and their bond through the Force is lovely. | 4k

Straight On 'Til Morning by arsenicarcher: Thor and Jane are having a baby. Tony’s conflicted about the whole thing. Rec: Kinda Tony-centric, but I’m always up for a fosterson baby. | 4.4k

hard to keep the rainclouds out by veliseraptor: Rec: A unique view on Thor’s grief and Jane’s struggle to be there for him. Very lovely, very angsty. | 2.1k

Perils of an RPF Life by hariboo: Look, it isn’t that she isn’t excited for Jane, sure she is. But Darcy wonders if Jane ever thinks about that. The fact she’s dating the sexiest E.T. ever. Rec: Darcy’s voice in this is hilarious and touching all at once. Jane and Thor’s caring for each other is so clear and endearing I audibly squeed a few times. | 2k

amazed & confused by tashlae: Dating an alien/god/man who fell from the sky isn’t something to take lightly. Rec: Jane and Darcy friendship is a lot of fun. Jane’s pondering of their relationship seems very characteristic of her. | 1k

On The Unsubtle Nature of Fish Ties by Niobium: Fancy clothes shopping for your alien boyfriend should be easier than this. Or, how Thor got his red velvet jacket. Rec: Fosterson is mostly background, but cute Jane/Darcy/Pepper interaction. | 3.3k

Be Safe by MissChrisDaae: Thor and Jane have a contingency plan for emergencies. Rec: Speculation/AU for Age of Ultron. Baby!fic, and is just so damn cute. | <1k

It All Happens Here by MissChrisDaae: Her very first year of teaching, Jane Foster gets an unusual bonus in the form of one of her students’ extremely attractive father. Single dad and his daughter’s kindergarten teacher au. Rec: super fluffy and just adorable. | 7.5k

Remembrance by Are_you_ever_not_going_to_fall_for_that: Thor and Jane take a walk and come across something that sparks memories. Post The Dark World. Rec: Jane and Thor talk about Loki, and the lack of heavy angst is refreshing. | <1k

Traffic jam by kes: When you’ve been fighting omnicidal aliens and the bureaucracy, a getaway is in order. Unfortunately, flying from A to B isn’t always possible… Rec: domestics. cute domestics EVERYWHERE. | <1k

nothing is ever convenient (except to make things uncomfortable) by anthropologicalhands: After Thor returns, there is still the matter of responding to Richard. Rec: The awkwardness of dealing with Richard made me smile. A very smile inducing fic. | 1.3k

Jane on Top by Rozilla: Jane Foster is asked to lecture at the SHIELD Academy, but she feels her old anxieties and worries begin to creep in- but it’s okay. Darcy has her back, not to mention it appears she has a fan club at the Science and Tech Division of the SHIELD Academy! Rec: An unapologetic Jane-fest, which is my favorite kind of party. Fosterson is background, but very relevant. Darcy is a cool friend. | 4.1k

leave this star crossed world behind by anthropologicalhands: Sif visits Jane with an offering. Rec: Jane/ Sif friendship, and they talk about immortality. Great interactions and insights on fosterson. | 2k

Measured Uncertainties by plushbug: Gap-filler, applying to the 2011 Thor movie. A shot at what might have gone missing from the rooftop scene between Thor and Jane Foster, after his 'rescue’ from the SHIELD base. Fits between “…and Asgard. That’s where I come from.” and “Thank you, Jane." Rec: A good fill for the movies, explains some comic-verse continuties. Curious Jane is a lovely person, and Thor relishes in giving her knowledge. | 4k

halfway between the gutter and the stars by verity: Thor pulls his phone out of his pocket and lifts it above them to capture a picture of the moment, their hair lit by the sun, Jane’s soft smile next to his beaming grin. The Rise filter suits the image perfectly. “I shall title this 'THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE,’” Thor says, typing carefully on the touchscreen. “With the small image of your planet, flanked by sparkling stars." "Well, we abandoned a geocentric model of the galaxy hundreds of years ago,” says Jane. "'THE CENTER OF MY UNIVERSE,’“ Thor says. He amends his caption and selects the options to crosspost from Instagram to Twitter and Facebook. Rec: Okay I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE this. So much. I love the world-building that Avengers + social media allows for. Also, cute Thor and Jane and team stuff plus Neil Degrasse Tyson and George Takei. So much good stuff. | 2.2k

Catalysts by Niobium: Meeting people winds up being a catalyzing event in Jane Foster’s life more often than not. Rec: Well-written Jane, and super supportive boyfriend Thor. I love it when he treats her like a genius. | 2.1k

The Reconstruction of the Mind by Niobium: Jane Foster’s introduction to astronomy doesn’t start with a backyard telescope or a shooting star or the arm of the Milky Way strewn across the nighttime sky, but with an Alexandrine woman named Hypatia. Rec: Jane-centric, and very well done, as per usual with this author. Fosterson is more background, but they have some lovely moments. | 4.6k

Asgardian Cautionary Tales for Young Maidens by Niobium: Jane discovers that Asgardian love stories aren’t exactly romcoms. Rec: Jane and Thor sharing love stories. I audibly squeaked at their cuteness. | 2.3k

the new millennia by hoosierbitch: Thor’s life was measured in centuries, not days. Rec: Post-Dark World, very Thor oriented and introspective. Jane helps him through his grief over Loki. Angst on angst. | 1.1k

the drumming inside her by hariboo: she can feel everyone looking at her, waiting for her to break or give up. they don’t understand. she made a promise too. Rec: oh my god Jane being determined, Thor pining a bit, Heimdall being awesome, and a super sweet reunion. | 1.3k

Starchild by empyrean: One night Jane teaches Thor the basics of Western astronomy, and Thor tries to describe Asgard. Then the Bifröst breaks, and Jane isn’t having that. Rec: Jane and Thor bond over the stars, and Jane doesn’t take it sitting down when the Bifrost breaks. Love the simplicity and the power in this. | 1k

There by Barkour: Jane has found Thor and in the finding, she has gone somewhere she’d never dreamed she’d see. Rec: Jane geeking out over Asgard, plus some really cute banter, and Thor being a gent as always. | 1.9k

Numbers and Lines by Sheeana: Jane Foster visits Avengers headquarters to help install a program she designed, and gets caught up in helping with their latest problem. Rec: Jane and Natasha get some great action together, and the Fosterson is handled well. | 4.9k

Important Meals of the Day by hariboo: or alternatively: Five Breakfasts With Jane and Thor and them feeding their family and friends. Which sometimes lately seem to be the same thing. Rec: domestics! Fluff that makes me want to stay there forever! I love this author’s way of writing fosterson. Also Darcy is so great in this. | 6.2k

Fire in the East by Maat: He finds that there are sweeter things than mead and glory and the fierce bright colors and rich textures of Asgard. Rec: Best Thor-being-on-Earth-longer fic that I’ve read. Short, poignant, sweet, and painful. This is beautifully written and left me wishing this was how the canon story could have gone down. | 1.1k

Few So Generous by galaxysoup: After Odin falls into the Odinsleep, Frigga takes up her husband’s spear and the rule of Asgard. Rec: Jane and Thor from an outside perspective, and a different version of events. Though the focus is not on fosterson outright, it is still a very good fic. | 2.7k

we fall like stars by jadeddiva: All that is left of him now is the extra chair pulled up to her makeshift fire pit, which she never sits in and hasn’t had the heart to move. Jane, and the search for Thor and a greater understanding of herself. Rec: A character study of Jane and how Thor affected her life. Lovely and poignant. Fluid writing style. | 3.1k

Not "Functional” or “Elegant�� by Niobium: Jane Foster has worked some bad jobs in her career; working with Stark Industries’ R&D is a vast improvement. Rec: Jane-centric, and gives her a great backstory. She and Thor are adorable as always. The author clearly respects Jane as a scientist, so that shows through a lot, which is amazing. | 1.6k

Jane Foster’s High School Reunion by Niobium: Jane Foster has a high school reunion to go to. Rec: Jane and Thor are adorable. Thor is a gentleman, and Jane gets to laugh in the face of a jerk. Very satisfying. | 5k

Nature and Nurture by nayanroo: What’s better than solving a physics problem that may well get you another Nobel Prize nomination? Having a baby on the same day. Rec: Part of an amazing series (full rec with multichapter fics below) but can be read as a standalone. Featuring pregnant!Jane and adorable and far-too-accurate expectantfather!Thor. The fluff is lovely. Features all of the Avengers with some lovely domestics. | 7.4k | Part of in progress series, The Kingsverse

don’t we all want happy endings? by hariboo: Thor is thinking about Jane, Steve cares (because Steve has Feelings about Lost Lady Loves*), and in the end it’s a team effort. Rec: We get the closure on Thor contacting Jane after the events in New York. Sweet and painful and just lovely. | 3.4k

Legacy by me: A generation later, a budding social scientist tries to figure out Jane and Thor. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. Both Jane and Thor have passed away in this fic. | 2k

Rated T

**Heed the Signs by igi_pigi: Thor wakes up from a nightmare. Is it just a dream, or something more? [Post Thor2, Pre Thor3.] Rec: A heavy, meaningful setup to a Thor 3 that never was. | 4.8k

**Heartless by igi_pigi: Everything reminds her of him, it's funny. Wherever she looks, whatever she thinks of, usually and especially to get her mind off him, will eventually lead to him. [Set the night before Jane's date with Richard in Thor2.] For Day 6 of Fosterson Week - 'things that make you think of them' Rec: A really interesting and fabulous rumination from Jane about Thor’s impact on her life. | 1.4k

**Her Healing Touch by igi_pigi: Jane doesn't really realise that the Aesir are a bit relaxed when it comes to physical hurt. And freaks out over what Thor thinks are just petty bruises of battle. Ending with a little confession from Thor. [Set after Thor2] Rec: A neat take on Asgardian culture, love the way Jane’s care connected to Thor’s past. | 2.5k

**Qeryana by Domenika Marzione (domarzione): Thor and his efforts to live on Midgard, as opposed to just defending it. Rec: Thor’s visceral struggle of living in a culture not his own, but is ultimately still hopeful and positive. | 3k

**First and Foremost, Red by RC_McLachlan: There's a reason Jane and Thor break up. It's not a great one but it's the right one. In the year that follows, Jane carries on, doesn't win a Nobel Prize, defeats Thanos and saves the universe, and finally allows herself to be a little selfish. Rec: YAAAAAS I want ALL the Jane Saves Everything in Infinity War/Endgame fic. ALL OF IT. It’s so satisfying and good. | 9.7k

**Gangráðr, Faðmbyggvir Friggjar by tsukinofaerii: Less than a week before her wedding, Frigga warns Jane of ancient Asgardian rituals she and Thor must undergo before her marriage ceremony. Jane and Thor call on their friends for help as they face what might be the challenge of their lives. Rec: Just an absolute fucking delight from start to finish. Hilarious and amazing. Absolutely the best of the 2012-era Avengers fics. | 19.1k

The Courage of Stars by always_a_queen: Half the universe turns to dust. Thor goes to find the one person who is his whole universe. Thor/Jane Post-Infinity War and during/after Endgame. Spoilers for both movies and Ragnarok. Rec: god this is so heartbreakingly perfect. A wonderful fix it that gives a perfect little taste of what we might’ve had if Jane had been rightfully included in these movies. Jane does pass away at the end of the fic. | Content Warning: Major Character Death | 4.3k

Family Values by shinyopals: ‘It would have been kinder to leave me dead,’ Loki informs her one day. Jane Foster, who’s just revoltingly kissed Thor goodbye, told him she loves him, and called him a disturbing pet name, snorts derisively. ‘He brought you lunch; quit whining,’ she says. Loki isn't sure how he feels about his family, these days. Rec: The best take on Loki ever. His relationship with Jane is fabulous, and the interplay between him, Thor, and Jane is AMAZING. What a freakin treat this fic is. Post-Infinity War AU. | 3k

The Second Law of Thermodynamics by shinyopals: ‘What have you done?’ he asks. He still attempts to sound grave, but with Jane it is hard not to give into smiles.‘Done? I haven’t done, well. I mean. I have done some things. But it’s not bad. I was just curious! And nobody stopped me. I mean, they even welcomed me. So. I didn’t do-’‘Jane,’ he interrupts, laughing and leaning down to plant a kiss on her mouth. ‘You are absurd. I missed you. Tell me.’ Rec: Pardon me while I try to physically scream this fic into existence. It’s perfect. Jane loves science, and Thor loves Jane. Post-Thor 2. | 1.8k

Storm Warning by shinyopals: Then he strides to her and presses a kiss to her lips, taking her face in his hands as he does and holding her close. ‘You planned this?’ he asks. ‘Your morning’s work was not astrophysics, then?’She gives a guilty smile. ‘I wanted to, you know, surprise you.’ Thor gets ~romanced. He kinda likes it. Rec: GOD THE FLUFF. THE. FLUFF. PURE AND GOOD. | 3k

Sakaar by MissChrisDaae: Jane's been stuck on Sakaar for a year and a half. So Asgardians are a welcome sight. Rec: A really original way to get Jane involved in Ragnarok. Jane + science for the win. | 1.3k

Lab by MissChrisDaae: Thor likes spoiling Jane. Rec: For the Jane on Asgard day of Fosterson Week, a short and sweet lil tidbit! | <1k

Domesticity by MissChrisDaae: Little moments around Avengers Tower. Rec: I literally gasped in delight with how much this made me nostalgic for the fluffy Avengers Living in the Tower fics of 2012. | <1k

The Prince(ss) and Me by asoulofstars, MissChrisDaae: Prince Thor of Asgard just wants a little time to feel normal before he has to marry the mysterious Princess Jana of Ameos. So, he runs away from home and enrolls at Harvard University as Donald Blake, where he meets Jane Foster. Jane is clever, kind, and everything he wants, but can never have.Princess Jana of Ameos has spent her whole life studying incognito, getting the best global education possible under the alias of Jane Foster and trying not to think about romance, or the fiancé waiting for her back in Europe. Then Don Blake comes along and throws that plan out the window. Rec: A funky Modern Royals AU. Charming in some nice ways, and I like the slow-building tension. | 17k

Misunderstandings by writerblocked: She looks up at Thor, who grins warmly at her, and looks at their surroundings again. “This isn’t my apartment,” she says. Thor’s grin grows wider. “I know,” he says back. Rec: Newlywed!Fosterson fluff. | 1.8k

Turtures in Aeternum by shinyopals: ‘Legend tells that some unlikely souls are known to pause in their work for reasons of leisure,’ deadpans Thor. ‘History does not say what trials they faced.’ Asgardian science is giving Jane a headache. Thor persuades her to take a break to see some of the sights with him. Rec: Asgardian worldbuilding (literally) via Fosterson field trip. I love everything in this. | 5.5k

Five Times the Bad Guys Interrupted Thor and Jane's Date Night and One Time Tony Freaking Wishes They Had by shinyopals: ‘I have told Steve,’ Thor says to Tony as he’s leaving to go back to his rooms, ‘but I thought I should tell you also. Jane and I plan to institute the ritual of ‘Date Night’.’ As always, Thor sounds like someone’s severely uncool father trying to be hip when he uses any slang invented since the Civil War. Tony's been an Avenger long enough to avoid deliberately tempting fate, even if he doesn't actually believe in fate. The universe is just plain cruel. That's why he knows to be prepared for the worst Hydra can throw at them whenever Thor and Jane make evening plans. Rec: IT’S SO FUDGING CUTE. I CAN’T. IT’S CUTE AND HILARIOUS AND PERFECT AS ALWAYS. | 4.7k

Unexpected Arrival by shinyopals: ‘Jane-’ Thor cut himself off, opening and closing his mouth without managing words. Her name on his lips sounded so familiar; warm and deep and like nothing else mattered. An undercurrent of nerves there that she could still hear after all this time, that she didn’t think anyone else would be able to. She wanted to run to him, bury her face in his neck and jump back in time. Back before the break up - not enough time for each other with the universe in peril. Back before the baby. The baby she still sometimes wondered if she should have terminated to save them both this moment. Rec: The angsty and painfully yearning babyfic that you never knew you needed. | 2k

Steadfast as the Stars Above by jdphoenix: It was not meant to be like this. With him so small and weak, fighting every second to find purchase on a tiny world that spins faster than he can fathom. He wanted to be strong for her. Rec: A fabulous use of the Soulmate AU that completely slots itself perfectly into canon. | 8.3k

too poor for silver, i have a copper tongue by venndaai: “Maybe you don't have the perfect words all the time but, you always have something to say, right? You never have to, have to stop and think about it, and you never stumble over your words or anything.” He squinted at her. “I thought such things simply aspects of Midgardian speech, which you know I am not well versed in.” Jane sighed. “They're not supposed to be.” Rec: A story featuring an explicitly autistic Jane Foster. So wonderfully done. Full of empathy and love and kindness and warmth. | 1.3k

Gift by spikewriter: Jane looked at the brightly colored rug on the floor of the farmhouse in the Hudson Valley they were still moving into. “I like it,” she admitted with a bit more enthusiasm, picturing how her six-year-old self would have run screaming around the room in glee at such a gift. Rec: Some post-TDW fluff with bonus Darcy inclusion. | 1.5k

to candle incandescent as you pass by sweetwatersong: The legacy of King Tristan and the Star Queen Yvaine is not a mere tale in Stormhold, a fantastical portion of the kingdom's history. It lives and breathes in the blood of their descendants, in their long lives and graceful aging, in the ruling King Odin and his son, the Crown Prince Thor… Rec: A Stardust/Huntsman/Thor fusion that isn’t so much a full fic as it is, as the author describes, “a sketch.” Still a really lovely read, a great blend of the films. | 5k

Raiment of The Gods by randomcelt: They say the clothes make the man ... or the god. But sometimes, they do the most for his friends. (Or, a tale of all the times someone else wore Thor's clothes and the adventures necessitating such a development.) Rec: A great Thor character piece. A heavy emphasis on Thor + the team which I love. Runs you through the full gamut of emotions in the best way. | 10k

How to Quantify by Rozilla: It turns out Jane has a personal top ten list of favourite equations - and a nice expanse of hot Norse God to write them on. Rec: Super sweet and also contains the phrase ‘who said science never got you laid’ so. Yep. | 2k

this new bravery by hoosierbitch: For alfadorisawesome, who requested Thor/Jane “about to hook up with someone who doesn’t know.” This is my favorite piece so far. <3 Rec: Incredibly well done Trans Jane Foster. I am such a sucker for open lines of communication between partners, and that’s exactly what this is. Thor is incredibly sweet, and this story establishes his very nonbinary opinions on gender which I LOVE, but he still makes an effort to understand Jane’s experience. I love this fic so much. | 1k

The Hammer and the Ice by grav_ity: In the course of her short and mortal life, the heart of Jane Foster has been twice touched by the sons of Asgard. Rec: I adore AUs where Jane was in the Avengers. This is a short flashfic, but really lovely. | 1k

A Royal Wedding by MissChrisDaae and Science_Thunder_Lightning_Love: After three years, ten months, an alien invasion, a cosmic event, and a baby, Thor and Jane finally make it to the altar. Rec: Ridiculously cute fluffies. | 7.5k | Part of the Convergence series

The Thunder God Job by fuzzy_paint: Jane and Thor are thieves. Rec: Oh lawd, the AU I never knew I needed. Beautiful characterization with a rich world they’re placed in. I only wish it was 200 chapters. | 16.2k

there was a star danced by tosca1390: This is the familiar rhythm of her days; the coffee shop until one pm, five days a week, then class and the lab, then home or the library. Here, in her last year with a future dark ahead of her, she doesn’t see anything to change her ways. Jane and Thor, meeting at a coffee shop. Rec: College/Coffee Shop AU. Bless the AU gods. Sly little Shakespeare references. Thor and Jane being cute, sweet idiots. | 6.2k

Proximity Alarm by fayedartmouth: Thor comes back to Earth. Jane thinks it’s great. Except all the times it isn’t. Rec: It’s a great writing style. Jane and Thor are awkward, adorable, and passionate in a realistic way. Them navigating how to be together is a challenge that not all authors can rise to, so this is a great piece. So much yes. | 13.7

Never So Empty by iwillavengeyou: Thor has traveled the nine realms and seen many things in his centuries of godhood. What could possibly make everything seem so empty? Rec: Wow, just no. This hurts. This is not cool. Ow. Ow. Transcends angst and ends up somewhere much worse. Read if you’re into self-flagellation or are making a reclist. I literally yelled “Wow rude” at the conclusion of this fic. Major Character Death | 1.5k

An Ancient Gesture by Niobium: Jane and Thor come up with a tradition for dealing with situations where a social function gets to be a little too much for either of them. Rec: Super smiley, stomach flutter inducing fic. Fluff upon fluff, but also Asgard culture/worldbuilding! Yay! | 2.8k

Five Times Jane Kinda Sorta Accidentally Slept With An Avenger, The One Time She Didn’t, And the Many (Many) Times It Wasn’t Even a Little Accidental by shinyopals: Some people collect Avengers trading cards. Some collect action figures. Jane Foster, almost entirely without meaning to, has them all beat. Rec: If you’re not convinced by that title and summary, I’m not sure I can help you. Hilarious, in character, and kinda cute. | 9.3k

Well Remembered by Rozilla: Jane’s met Tony Stark before. Rec: Cracky and hilarious. | 1.1k

you may end up wanting more from this life by tosca1390: Everything is cold where it was once warm, and Jane is at a loss. Rec: Not sure why I haven’t put this beautiful thing on here yet. Deals with their separation, and a great character study of Jane. Angsty. | 1.6k

The Hearts of Stars and Thunder by MissChrisDaae, Science_Thunder_Lightning_Love: Rec: A Snow White and the Huntsman/Thor fusion. Really great use of characters, and all of the medieval battles and fosterson abound. | 7.7k

You Get One Phone Call by MissChrisDaae: Following the Battle of Manhattan, Jane gets a phone call. Rec: Post-battle strain, but then suddenly fosterson cuteness hits you like a wrecking ball. | <1k

Abs of Thunder by Unknownnobody32: During a flight on-board Stark’s jet, Jane learns how turbulence, pasta sauce, her Thunder god boyfriend, and his rock hard abs can soon become a recipe for embarrassment all thanks to bad timing. Rec: Takes washboard abs to another level. God, this is just too funny. | 2.1k

London, underground by Maybug: Clint Barton meets some familiar faces and has a very bad day hunting the jotunbeast left behind in London after the convergence. Rec: an awesome outside POV on fosterson, plus badass science Jane and her science assistant Thor, and awesome Clint. | 2.6k | Part of the Fosterson Files series

We have loved the stars to fondly by Maybug: Jane and Thor are up to something on the roof of the Tower. Tony thinks he knows what it is, but doesn’t see why he should be the one to tell them to stop. Rec: Outside POV of fosterson. Basically Thor does cute/dangerous things for Jane’s happiness. | 1.8k | Part of the Fosterson Files series

change places by coffeesuperhero: Jane and Thor get in the way of a Stark experiment. This goes about as well as you might expect. Rec: Body swap madness. So many cute moments though, plus some implied sexytimes with swapped bodies “for science.” So much yes. | 3.1k

Slowly, We Adjust by katsumi: Jane Foster leaves the lab on Friday exhausted, overworked, and petrified that she won’t get the grant proposal for her wormhole experiment finished in time to get funding. So, of course she gets rear-ended, because that’s just the kind of week she’s having. Rec: Protective/Worried Thor is best Thor. Reassuring Jane is best Jane. So much angst/cute. | 1.4k

Put a Ring on It by fuzzy_paint: Jane makes Thor a wedding ring. Rec: What it says on the tin. | 3.9k

The Pretty Birds Have Flown by beanarie: "Jane never pukes, not when she first wakes up, not at any other time of day. She has a cast-iron stomach and wicked stable inner ears, and morning sickness doesn’t stand a chance.“ The one where Thor knocked Jane up that night they chilled on the roof, and offscreen Frigga swore Heimdall to secrecy in the interest of protecting everyone involved. The All-Father’s house has a lot of enemies, okay. Rec: Heartbreaking, fluffy, and feelsy. Batten down the emotional hatches. | 2.2k

Jane Foster and the Impossible Library by Niobium: Jane, Darcy, and Thor find a peculiar library, and their afternoon takes a turn for the bizarre. Rec: This one’s wild from start to finish (I say that lovingly), but as always, Niobium delivers on fantastic characterizations. Not super-duper shippy, but so worth the read. | 12.4k | Part of the Jane Foster Works series

Northern Climes by Tyranusfan: Six months after the Avengers saved New York from the Chitauri invasion, Thor must convince Odin to return him to Earth. Rec: Jane and Thor doing cutesy couple-y things. The author captures well the eager awkwardness of a new couple while remaining true to their characters and story. | 4.3k

nowhere to go but up by anthropologicalhands: It is not uncomfortable, waking up with Thor’s arm draped over her waist, their legs entangled under the sheets. It is inconvenient when she wants to get out of bed or, at the very least, look over last night’s data. Rec: So very fluffy it makes me want to roll in it. Adorably domestic, too. Jane at her scienceing finest. | 2.3k

Late Night Waiting by hariboo: Jane didn’t often get home late. Rec: A very sweet and simple Jane/Thor that makes their relationship seem very grounded and real. Also, it is so sweet it makes my teeth hurt, and then I just want more. | 2.1k

Uru by sheffiesharpe: Thor cannot look after Jane, no matter how he wants to. Hogun offers a solution. Puente Antiguo receives another unexpected visitor. Rec: The author makes a really strange concept work brilliantly. Jane and Thor’s pining is frustrating and well-written, and the writing sizzles with unresolved sexual tension. | 6k

Star-Crossed by websandwhiskers: A vignette taking place during "Avengers”, after shawarma, before Thor returns to Asgard with Loki. Thor and Jane have their reunion, and discuss their future. Rec: Jane is an awesome person, and Thor respects the hell out of her. One of the best portrayals of Jane Foster that I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading. | 1.7k

The Morning After by fuzzy_paint: "I can’t believe we’re doing this,“ Jane says. "Can you believe we’re doing this?" Rec: Even without much in way of dialogue, Jane and Thor’s devotion is plain. We get a little view of domestics, too. | 1.7k

The Observable Universe by Sarea Okelani (sarea): As an astrophysicist, Jane studies the observable universe for work, but in her free time what she likes to study is a bit closer to home. (Or: Jane has a low tolerance for stupidity. Clint and Natasha take exception to being called stupid.) Rec: Not a ton of overt Jane/Thor, and is mostly an outsider POV on Clint/Natasha, but there is lots of team shenanigans and there is definitely a lot of affection for Thor from Jane’s POV. | 10k

Deal by GreenVelvetCurtains: Jane introduces Thor to the great Midgardian tradition of being made to remove your clothing when you lose a hand of poker. Everybody wins! Rec: I got a huge kick out of this one. Toeing the line of becoming crackfic. Oh, how I wish there was a smutty follow up. | 2k

Before the Fall by verily-thor: Jane helps Thor prepare for Ragnarök. Rec: Oh god, if you’re in the mood for some sadness, come on in here. Tragic without being grotesque, stripping it down to the bare emotions, and two people who love each other more than anything. | <1k

top gun is not a movie; it’s a lifestyle by hariboo: jane and thor got that loving feeling. Rec: an AU that is reminiscent of Top Gun, which is a fab movie. Awesome Jane, and adorable Thor. | 2k

A Brief Introduction to Asgardian Dinner Parties by jonesandashes and pentapus: This is the first Earth-Asgard bonding opportunity since that time Loki punched interstellar relations in the face, twice, and the king and queen of Asgard are here, and they are her boyfriend’s parents. Jane is absolutely not going to get drunk at this party, is the point. Rec: This fic makes you smile, then laugh, then cringe, then do it all over again. | 4.5k

Destiny, Disrupted by me: Loki never sends the Destroyer to Midgard. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 3.5k

Rated M (these won’t contain the smuts unless otherwise noted)

**The Teardrop by igi_pigi: Post-Infinity War reunion of Thor and Jane. Forewarning - heavy angst. [Set right after the movie] Rec: Angst, melodrama, and desperation ahoy. Contains some smut | 4.2k

all the best distractions by fuzzypaint: They've found a rhythm when they share Jane's lab, Jane with her science and Thor with his own work, and though it is easy to be distracted by each other, usually they're both very capable of avoiding such things. Usually. Rec: Cunniligus in the lab ;) | Contains smut | 1.8k

Patience and Poker by Rozilla: Jane and Thor sneak off from one of Stark's parties for a quiet chat. Nope, just kidding, hot tub sex. Snarky hot tub sex. Best kind. Rec: What it says on the tin and it’s delightful. | Contains smut | 4k

A Deal with the Duke: An Epilogue by hariboo: Thursdays were busy days around the house, but today was the first day of winter much. Thankfully, the skies were clear, without a hint of storm, but the wind was sharp and bit into his cheeks. He was looking forward to a warm meal and seeing his wife, curling around her in bed for rest of the evening. Rec: Historical romance AU. A nice slice of life bit. Contains minor smut | 2.8k

Ray of Light by evieeden: To Thor, Jane shone brighter than any star in the sky. Advent fic for 18th December. Rec: A sweet, introspective fic from Thor’s POV. | 1.5k

just memories to hold by tosca1390: When the dust and light and smoke clears, the roof of Stark Tower is still intact. Jane can still feel the surge of power in her fingertips, thinks she could hear the songs of Asgard, feel the chill of Jotenheim, as the bridge built itself through Yggdrasil, Thor calling her name across realms. And then, a shadow falls over Jane. Rec: A really, really great post-Avengers reunion fic. Contains some smut | 3.6k

set with the stars by hariboo: jane tries to teach thor earth’s stars. tries, being the operative word. Rec: Jane and Thor getting distracted by each others’ sexy is my favorite thing. Contains some smut | 1.5k

It Could Be Sweet by hariboo: Jane and Thor traverse their last year of high-school. However, they didn’t expect it to be together. Rec: I am not a big fan of high school AUs, but if they float your boat, this is definitely worthwhile. Contains some smut | 7.8k | Part of Let’s Be Young Forever series

Thunder Whispered Low by Niobium: Rec: I love it when Thor talks about his magic, and the bridge that makes between him and Jane. Contains minor smut | 1.5k

Specularity by Niobium: Jane’s bad day improves significantly with a little reflection. Rec: A great slice of life fic, really, really nice interactions. Contains very minor smut | 3k | Part of the Jane Foster Works series

My Blood is Singing by Niobium: Sometimes Thor pushes a storm a little too far. And, sometimes, the storm pushes back. Rec: Jane and Thor at their domestic finest, with some internal angst and the simple comfort found with another person. Contains smut | 2.9k

All my faces are alibis by agirlnamedchuck: Thor is strong and stubborn and she thinks she could be a good king. Maybe even a great one. Besides she’d never seen herself as queen anyways. Rec: Genderswapped Thor. Fosterson is minimal, but amazing insights into Thor’s character. | 6.5k

Leaving On An Airship by Rozilla: To escape to a better life, Jane Foster, maid to a cruel villainous Baron, must leave her lover and disguise herself. But not before one last goodbye. Rec: *cartwheels into the sun* FOSTERSON STEAMPUNK WITH SMUT AND FEELINGS OH GOD SEND HELP. Contains some smut | 2.6k

Unrememberance by letthesongtakeflight: Before he became the Huntsman, he was a prince. Rec: Marvel/Snow White and the Huntsman fusion. Prequel of sorts to SWatH. Angst on angst. Major character death | 1.2k

steal my heart 'til kingdom come by tosca1390: Her eyes stray over reading upon reading; she thinks she can taste the tang of energy and ozone even now, and that strange sense of pine and smoke that she associates with Thor. Rec: AU post-Avengers where Thor goes to visit Jane who has remained in New Mexico. Yay for a great collision of two characters who absolutely did not prepare for any of this. Contains some smut | 2.1k

fingerprints that leave me covered for days by tosca1390: It is not all lost, to be stranded here. Perhaps, he could make something of it. Rec: Another AU in which Thor is on Earth longer in the first movie. Great development for Thor, and the relationship he has with Jane feels very real. | 5.5k

journeys end in lovers’ meeting by tosca1390: Solitary moments in snow; it sounds conducive to rest, to a time of rejuvenation before her research resumes. Rec: A really cute AU based on the movie The Holiday (which I’ve never seen before). Just adorable holiday fluff wherein Thor is human. Contains some smut | 19k

Bound by Medie: It was ironic that his and Loki’s greatest mistakes had led to her. Rec: Some tame bondage featuring dom!Jane. Contains smut | 1.1k

Rated E (these will contain the smuts unless otherwise noted)

**Ambush by orphan_account: Jane isn't into violence, but there's something about those SHIELD debriefings, something primal and raw about hearing how the bad guys got their asses handed to them by the good guys, something that inspires her to act on instinct alone. Rec: If you’ve got a thing for Thor’s armor.... mmmhmmm. | 1.1k

Is This More than You Bargained for Yet by Anshin Archives: Thor and Jane's first go at sex. Jane's expecting Thor to have a cock, and is surprised when he doesn't. It doesn't take her long to adjust. (Pure porn for the excuse of writing Thor with a vagina.) Rec: Genderfluidity and completely accepted queerness for the win. | 2.5k

When Jane Pegged Thor by waldorph: They raise them slutty in Asgard. Rec: What it says on the tin. Pretty damn hot if pegging is up your alley ;). | 1.4k

Practical Magic by Rozilla: Freya’s flowers can do funny things to you. Rec: Roz is the queen of smut so this is amazing. Kind of a play on sex pollen, but takes it in a totally new, refreshing direction. Asgardian sex magic for the win. | 2.8k

built on the old rivers by fartherfaster: You catch her wrist and delicately kiss the bone of it. “Nothing to be sorry for,” you tell her. She composes her reality in absolutes and theories and the true phenomenal names of things. Colloquial language is not her means of communication. You like her hard lines, her curiosity, her determination. Jane would never call Mjolnir just a hammer, and that puts a small, needy part of you to rest. There is a storm in the desert, and Thor comes to terms with all of his changes. The one where human-Thor has Lichtenberg figures. Rec: Incredibly poignant and the author makes a second-person POV work incredibly well. | 3.3k

Tell Me Something New by hariboo: "Compile the data of the reading we took during Convergence. The gravitational–“ She trails off, can’t finish the sentence out loud or in her mind, her voice catching on the words as Thor’s mouth latches onto her throat. Rec: Cute and hot and perfect because smart Jane is Thor’s biggest turn on. | 1.5k

On the Throne by murdur: His insistence that she should sit on the throne had been in jest and merriment, but the sight of her sitting upon the seat now makes his heart beat quick and steals his breath. Rec: Oh my god, Thor goes down on Jane while she sits on the throne of Asgard. I have nothing else to say. *dies* | <1k

Experience Counts for Something by Rozilla: Jane was surprised at Thor’s new female body- but pretty keen to explore it. Rec: Bisexual Jane and Genderfluid Thor are great. Some hot femslash fosterson. | 2.3k

Just Get In The Van by paxnirvana: Written for a prompt on Anenko’s Bad Sex & Awkward Romance: a comment-a-thon that got away from me. Rec: All first time sex is gonna be awkward, friends, even if you’re Jane and Thor. Might as well enjoy the ride. | 6.3k

close your eyes and count to ten by fuzzy_paint: Post battle, Jane and Thor make sure the other still lives. Rec: Reassurance of safety sex is hot. Sue me. Still manages to be angsty too. | 2.4k

We Woke Up In The Kitchen by hariboo: He didn’t think he could miss someone as he missed her, but there is something singular in Jane that pulls at him and threatens to overtake him. Rec: post-TDW sexies that are adorable and awkward and hot all at once, plus some really nice conversation at the end. This author just really gets Jane and Thor in a way that is always awesome to read. | 3.7k

A Helping Hand by fuzzy_paint: Jane can’t sleep. Thor has a solution. Rec: Some nice, cute sleepy!smut to help Jane to relax and stop thinking. | 1.5k

The Scientific Method by Serious Snugglebunnies: Thor is much too honourable to have meaningless sex with Jane - but will he do it for the sake of science? Rec: Cracky, hilarious, and hot. | 3.3k

A Thorny Situation by GreenVelvetCurtains: Jane has a problem and she’s not afraid to try and solve it. Rec: A hot fantasizing/masturbation piece starring the lovely Jane Foster. | 2.7k

Detours by ancarett: Life is a highway. Jane takes Thor on the detours. Missing moments from the movie. Rec: Some mildly awkward sex which is actually kind of adorable and works out for everyone in the end. Not my favorite smut ever, but worth a read. | 3.9k

Say It’s Okay by theleaveswant: Darcy gave her a sympathetic pout and walked around the table to put both hands on Jane’s upper arms. “Okay. Honey? I know this isn’t your preferred way of handling things, but it looks like you’re going to have to talk with him.” Rec: Big premium on 'consent is sexy.’ Jane teaches Thor how to pleasure her. Not my favorite smut, but worth a read. | 2.1k

Accretion by RC_McLachlan: "You are burning inside,” Thor whines, rolling his hips again, and she rides it out helplessly, eyes rolling back, lungs cramping with envy for air. “Like a star." Rec: A seriously hot look at the simple difference in size between Jane and Thor. | 1.6

Salt On Your Lips by Barkour: The strawberry daiquiri is indeed a drink worthy of adulation, but Thor prefers the taste of Jane Foster. Rec: For it’s sense of fun that comes with the sex, and the pure happiness of two people who simply enjoy being in each other’s company. | 2k

Good Morning by me: Jane wakes up with Thor between her legs.My addition to Fosterson Week’s smut day. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 2k

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year by me: Jane and Thor do Christmas. (Finally.) Tis the season for holiday smut. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 5.4k

Your Highness by me: Jane wants something in bed and Thor is more than happy to oblige. For the first day of Fosterson Week, post-TDW. Rec: It’s not a true reclist without a self plug. | 6k

Not Your Average Star Trek Fanfiction by me: After several years of unresolved sexual tension, Jane and Thor are in quite a rush to rectify the situation. Takes place immediately following TDW. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 3.7k

#fosterson #jane foster #thor #jane x thor #thor x jane #fosterson fic rec masterlist #fic recs

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strawberrysoup · 5 years ago

Text

Let’s Review || Chapter 17

Peter Parker knew that his big sister would do anything for him to be safe and happy. She’d given up everything for him twice over already and would do it again in a heartbeat. And that’s why, when the criminal mastermind Tony Stark started inextricably following him around, he didn’t say a word. Because he knew without a doubt Penny would do whatever she had to if it meant keeping Peter safe. He had to protect her, just like she always protected him. He never considered what would happen if Stark decided both Parker siblings were worth taking. Never considered who else in Stark’s inner circle would agree. He just wanted to protect her and yet somehow, they both ended up with needles in their necks.

relationship: Steve Rogers/Original Female Character/Bucky Barnes, background Peter Parker/Tony Stark rating: Explicit warnings: Dark Steve Rogers, Dark Bucky Barnes, Dark Tony Stark, Dark Avengers, kidnapping, non-consensual&dark sexual situations, underage Peter Parker, emotional and psychological abuse, dark sexual situations VERY SERIOUS REMINDER: we’re getting into perilous content. heed the tags, this story features NON-CONSENSUAL SEXUAL SITUATIONS, power imbalances, and really, really fucked up characters with really horrible and fucked up motives. YOU MUST BE OVER 18 TO READ THIS STORY. put yourself first, if this story is going to trigger or upset you, do not continue.

"You know, with the right training she could be—"

"Don't. Don't say it, Clint." Bucky still had an ice pack pressed against his head, laid in one of the beds in Bruce's med lab with Tony in a similar situation to his left. Penny was medically sedated and laying across Bucky's chest, looking far too peaceful for having attempted two whole murders not an hour ago.

Natasha smiled at the way her blond friend pouted, crossing his muscled arms over his chest and muttering something about "I was just saying…". She'd come home just in time to witness the chaos that followed Penny's admittedly brutal attack (she would never tell the soldiers, but she was at least 75% sure that given the right combination of timing and surprise Penny could absolutely kill at least one of them) and hadn't stopped smiling since.

Seeing Penny Parker on a television screen, filmed by a shitty old laptop webcam, was entirely different than seeing her in person. She was just as cute, made the same little irritated faces and noises but she could see what Steve had seen so early on now, that there was something more. Even after she’d literally just taken a makeshift baseball bat to his skull, Bucky’s hands were running up and down her back, chin brushing the top of her head. They’d mentioned something about not wanting her to have to see a needle mark after being sedated, Steve had changed her into a long sleeve shirt and a pair of pink shorts, but not before making everyone but Tony and Bucky leave the room.

There was something about her that made the people in her vicinity want to do things for her. She made people want to make her happy. It was some kind of compulsion, found most deeply in the three men currently resting closest to her— she’d tried to literally break his ribs, but even Tony had an arm stretched over the gap between beds to hold her hand.

The man in question was actually the main reason she’d headed to the medical floor upon returning to the tower. There were times when Tony became strangely unapproachable and it had taken a good 30 minutes of him reclining back on a hospital bed for him to regain his usual nonchalance and easiness. As soon as he recognized her lurking near the back of the room he’d motioned her over but was quick to ask her to wait until Penny had been under for a sufficient amount of time before asking for a debrief.

“She’s gonna lose it when she wakes up,” Steve was talking mostly to Bucky, both hands on his lovers, “we’ll need to at least prove that Peter’s alright, immediately.”

“She can’t see him for a bit,” Bucky’s tone was tighter than Natasha would’ve expected, his hands running up under the back of Penny’s shirt, “no offense Tony, but Penny was trying so hard and he just—”

“No offense taken, Buckaroo,” Tony was tapping away at his tablet with his free hand, “Peter is in very big trouble.”

“Penny is too,” Steve sighed heavily, elbows sinking into the mattress of Bucky and Penny’s bed slightly harder, “I just don’t know… She obviously has to be punished, what she did could’ve caused a lot more damage if she’d taken half a second longer to think it through, but at the same time—”

“At the same time we know she’s going to do whatever she thinks she has to in order to protect him.” Bucky removed one hand from Penny’s back to grasp his boyfriend’s. “We should’ve been ready for it. She doesn’t have impulse control when it comes to Peter, she needed us to keep her steady and we didn’t.”

“If you are going to begin infantilizing her, you would best do it now.” There was a sharp delight in Loki’s tone as the man spoke, a wicked smirk on his face while he stood with his arms crossed over his chest near the wall. “Otherwise, keep in mind that she is an adult and is capable of rational thought.”

“Sometimes she may not be, brother.” Thor sent the slender man a quick look of derision. “A rage is not something we can all dig our way out of and you know that just as well as I. Penny will trade herself and her own safety for Peter’s every time, in any case.”

“I would say we’d take her for another lesson with Rumlow, but…” Steve very deliberately turned his gaze to her and Natasha forced herself not to preen under the eyes of one of her best friends, who knew she wouldn’t have returned unless she’d been successful in her task.

“I’m afraid he’s going to be coming with me, after a debrief,” she inclined her head towards Tony, eyes darting just momentarily to Penny in question.

“She’s been out long enough at this point she shouldn’t be able to still hear anything and if she does her brain won’t be able to make sense of it,” Bruce stated from his desk in the corner, having heard the woman’s hesitation.

“Go ahead, Nat,” Tony added when the redhead still hesitated.

“I found good matches for Penny and Peter,” she stated, producing photographs from her back pocket, “they’re not perfect, I’d need a bit more time, but they’ll be good enough. We’ll just need to mutilate the bodies more than usual, people won’t ask questions when they fit the situation so well. I’m going to burn the bodies in the woods, make it look like Rumlow got lost trying to find his way back to his car and died in the wilderness.”

Tony hummed, brushing his fingers over the figures in the photographs. They’d been beaten in the process of their abduction but their general size, shape, and ages were correct. The kid wasn’t anything close to his baby boy, nothing in comparison to Peter, but he would likely fit the bill of tall, skinny, 17 almost 18-year-old boy who potentially didn’t get proper nutrition. The woman who’d been taken in place of Penny was slightly closer, if only because the skin was nearly the right shade (which wouldn’t matter once the body was burned, anyway).

“How are the police doing?”

“They’re pretty sure Penny was the target,” Clint butted in, having assisted with infiltrating the law enforcement presence surrounding the situation, “Peter was an unfortunate casualty. They have two or three leads but obviously nothing accurate, although her friend did come forward and tell the police Penny had been attacked in a club all those months ago.”

Tony swung his legs over the side of the hospital bed but carefully waited for a go head nod from Bruce before getting to his feet. “I’m going to run some security tests, make sure nothing’s going to come back to us. Natasha, feel free to take a break before you run off with Rumlow.”

“Hold on, Tony, I’m gonna come with you.” Steve leaned over and kissed Bucky gently, running his lips over the back of Penny’s head. “We’re obviously gonna need some advice going forward with Penny and I don’t know a better person to talk it over with.”

“Right on Cap, let’s go,” Tony turned and bent over to kiss Penny’s visible cheek, “take care of her, Bucky Bear.”

“She won’t stay under long after I remove the anesthesia, we should do a blood test while she’s out,” Bruce interjected as he walked to one of the medical cabinets near his desk, “give her the vaccinations she’s missing—”

“Can you get that thing out of her arm?” Steve stopped just short of the doorway, Tony nearly running into his back. “There’s no way she’ll let us do it while she’s awake unless we restrain her.”

“The birth control implant?” Bruce nodded, “Yeah, it’s just a quick incision.”

Bucky hummed quietly, one hand coming up to tangle in her hair. “Is there anything else she needs that you can do while she’s asleep?”

“I don’t think so,” Banner shook his head while he continued to ready his equipment, “I’m gonna take enough blood to run all of the tests we need, she might be a little woozy for a bit once she wakes up. Just make sure she eats and drinks plenty.”

“She’ll wake up scared but after that she’ll settle pretty fast,” Steve crossed his arms over his chest. “She knows she’s gonna get a punishment, she’ll be good ‘cause she’s scared to make it worse.”

Bucky heaved a sigh, feeling Penny shift on his chest in the process. Thor and Loki remained in the room while Bruce puttered around, despite Natasha and Clint following at a respectful distance behind Steve and Tony. They hadn’t actually been near Penny since her arrival and he could tell the brothers were curious—obviously, the stories had been running rampant. She was certainly a curiosity.

“She really is quite precious,” Thor’s voice was a rumble as he came to sit in the chair Steve had vacated, “the things she has gone through would have ruined some people.”

Loki scoffed from his corner but Bucky didn’t take it personally; Thor and Loki had been through things that would cripple a normal person. Their childhoods had been full of the kind of suffering most people had nightmares about, literal torture. But in all fairness, Thor and Loki had been ruined by what they’d gone through.

“Bucky, lift her arm up and put her hand behind her head, I need to get to her tricep to get the implant out,” Bruce had rolled a little metal tray over to the bedside, “it’s a small incision, I’ll press the implant out and bandage it up.”

“How soon will it lose effect?”

The look the doctor leveled him was derisive, “Immediately, Buck. She’s gonna be fertile very quickly, you’ll need to make sure she has what she needs for when she starts to menstruate again.”

It took real, actual willpower to keep himself from popping a boner. The word fertile was weird and held certain connotations, but the idea that if he came inside her she could get pregnant was almost mind-blowing. He and Steve wanted a big family, they always had, even when it had just been the two of them. They’d never thought anything would come of it, especially in the ‘40s but even after they’d found themselves hurled 70 years into the future. Two men adopting children was still persistently frowned upon. That wouldn’t be a problem anymore though, they had Penny, they had their babydoll. They were gonna have babies.

Bruce proceeded to cut the implant out and bandage her up, take so many vials of blood from her arm that Bucky started getting concerned, and inject several vaccinations into each of her arms. He warned that she’d likely be sore, to keep her in long sleeves so she couldn’t irritate or see the injection sites.

“Everything should be set to rights in your apartment,” Loki stated when Bucky finally came to stand up, Penny carefully cradled in his arms, “anything broken was replicated and replaced, the cats are with the little witch. I do suggest keeping her away from any object that can be wielded like a bat, her swing would likely give Thor a run for his money.”

“She is a little warrior,” Thor stood up nodding, coming around the bed to stand next to his brother, “I hope that soon she will feel safe enough to know she does not have to be.”

“Steve and Tony will come up with something.” If there was one thing Buck had no doubts about it was that if the pair of them put their heads together over a problem, it would inevitably be solved rather quickly. “We’ve just gotta keep her safe in the meantime. I’m gonna get her up to bed. How long on those sedatives, Bruce?”

“Not long, probably half an hour, an hour max. She’s going to be drowsy for a bit once she comes out of it too, so keep an eye on her.”

Bucky slipped through the necessary pleasantries and found himself walking just slightly faster than usual towards the elevator. For some reason the ride took forever, all he wanted was Penny back in their bed, wrapped in blankets that smelled like them.

Well, actually, that might’ve been a small white lie. In all honesty, he was very much preoccupied with the idea of Penny sleeping while filled to the brim with his cum. He wouldn't fuck her while she was unconscious, not for their first time anyway, but he wanted his cum on her, in her, somehow ASAP and his cock completely agreed. He knew that Steve would likely disagree with him, the blond had been pressing him for patience for weeks but he couldn't hold back completely— not while an image of the tiny Penny standing with a hugely pregnant belly (twins, he told himself, she was so big because she had two babies in there) watched him demurely through dark lashes in his mind's eye.

He barely registered walking into the apartment, kicking off his shoes or shutting their bedroom door. The kittens were with Wanda, their friend not wanting to leave the poor things alone for too long, and he found the absence of the squeaky meows a small relief; that had been a part of what set Penny off before.

They'd been doing that a lot— tiptoeing around Penny. She was delicate, in a very complicated situation, but they had been walking on eggshells with her since day one. They'd been so determined to make her happy they'd forgotten that breaking Penny needed to be a priority. She was strong-willed and he loved that, but her determination and stubbornness needed to be directed constructively. They should've been more stern with her from the beginning, more exacting.

Bucky had decided on behalf of both him and Steve that it would be changing immediately upon her waking. Once he'd set her on the bed rested up against the headboard and several pillows, he immediately pulled off her little pink shorts and smiled at the sight below; Penny was small but she had a particularly sweet bubble butt and the panties they had for her didn't really fit because of it. The fabric was consistently caught between the cheeks of her ass, pulled tight in the crotch with dusky pussy lips almost peaking out on either side, especially when he splayed her legs wide to either side.

His cock came out of his joggers and slapped against his lower stomach just as soon as he lowered the waistband far enough. Fully erect he was incredibly impressive, a combination of a botched super-soldier serum and genetics. He had always had a healthy sex drive, even when he and Stevie had been half-starving in their late teens he could remember railing the blond's ass in whatever speck of privacy he could achieve nearly every day. Stevie had whined even back then, even before the enhancements that Bucky had too much cum, that he felt like Bucky dumped buckets up his asshole every time they fucked. 'It's like gettin' an enema at the doctor, Buck,' the skinny blond would whine, holding himself around the gut as they walked down the street, 'I need'a bathroom.' Bucky would tell him that he better keep his asshole clenched to keep it all in, otherwise it'd look pretty bad while they walked. 'You want people to think you shit yourself with the wet spot you'd make punk? You better hold that cum until we get home— if you start to spill before that I might have to pull you into an alley and fill you back up.'

It was a thing, he supposed, his very slight obsession with his cum filling and covering his lovers. Bucky climbed up onto the bed, hovering over Penny's waist while he jerked his cock. He'd imagined Penny walking around with belly fulls of cum constantly and figured daily blowjobs would be a good way to curb her stubbornness. Precum dripped from the tip of his cock and he arched his back to rub the head over her just slightly parted lips. It had been days since he and Steve had gotten a chance to go at it and he felt his balls draw up at the sensation of her breath on his oversensitive skin.

"That's good babydoll," he murmured, slipping his thumb between her lips and gently coaxing her mouth open wider, "lemme cum right on that sweet tongue baby. Give you plenty to drink, just like Bruce said."

He slipped his cock just between her lips, groaning at the sensation while continuing to work himself. He could come buckets if he tried but was careful to bring on just a small orgasm, just enough to take the edge off.

"My good girl, you would take my whole cock down your throat, wouldn't you," his voice was gritty and low, "gonna swallow a whole load.. but for now…"

He moaned her name when he came, thick ropes covering her tongue quickly. He tilted her head back and rubbed her throat gently, coaxing her to swallow before he grasped the base of his dick almost painfully and shifted down her body. As much as he liked seeing her pretty lips covered in his drying cum, there was another spot he wanted to mark just as thoroughly.

Pulling the crotch of her underwear to the side was easy with the way he'd spread her legs and he was quick to work his hand down his cock, shooting the rest of his load into her panties. His breathing was faster than normal during an orgasm and as he pressed her panties back in place, slipping his fingers under the waistband and pulling them high, high, high on her hips to work his cum all over her little pussy, he realized he hadn't had such a satisfying orgasm since the first time he'd seen her on that shitty webcam footage.

He heaved a sigh, carefully rearranging Penny to lay comfortably in the bed and gently pulling her silk shorts back up her legs. They’d likely be the only pair of pants she wore for the next week; her punishment would begin in the morning, a 25 count spanking every day for 5 days—1 for Tony’s bruised ribs, 2 for the grade of concussion Bucky had from the hit, 1 for Steve’s broken nose, and 1 for not following the rules. Their poor baby definitely wouldn’t be sitting on the bruises for a while.

Bucky’s eyes flickered up when the bedroom door opened, only to nearly get yet another erection upon seeing Steve’s shirtless form illuminated from behind. The blond had a tendency to undress while walking from room to room in the apartment, leaving behind trails of clothes in his wake. His shirt was still in hand this time, likely a new habit in development after the few days he’d experienced Penny’s disgruntled looks every time she found a rogue shirt flung haphazardly across the apartment.

“Is that cum on her lips, Buck?” His voice was gravelly and Bucky let a slow smirk cross his face.

“In all fairness, I hadn’t come yet,” Bucky’s hand trailed down between her tights, swirling his fingers in the mess in her panties and showing it to the other man in the light, “not until this.”

“Is that right, jerk? You telling me you didn’t cum in her mouth? I don’t believe that for a second,” Steve slipped around the side of the bed, tugging Bucky back towards the edge and pressing his thumb past the brunet’s lips to stroke against his tongue. “Penny’ll be asleep for a little longer, why don’t you come take a shower with me?”

Bucky took the time to lean over Penny’s sleeping form and press his lips against her cheek before letting Steve pull him to his feet and into the bathroom. He made sure to leave the door propped open, just in case Penny started to wake up while they were still in the shower.

In all honesty, they probably let things get away from them; the anesthesia mixed with the vaccinations and the blood loss wreaked quick havoc on Penny’s consciousness as she dragged herself awake; there was a sense of panic and despair caught in her chest but she didn’t know why? She didn’t know where she was, where was Peter, where was Aunt May—

The slowly increasing despair suddenly flooded through her, eyes blurring until Aunt May took shape in the shadows and contours of the bed beside her. God, she looked so pretty, so young, but her usual smile was missing. Instead, there were tears on her cheeks and a tremble shook her form.

“May?” Penny’s voice felt hoarse, several octaves lower than usual, “Aunt May, why’re you crying?”

May didn’t answer, her hand came down to rest on Penny’s shoulder but she couldn’t feel it. She couldn’t feel the familiar weight, the comforting heat. Something wasn’t right, her head swam. Why was she so messed up? The last time—

“What did you do, Pen?” Aunt May’s voice warbled, tapering off at the end.

“Do?” She wasn’t sure if the word actually came out, had she actually spoken?

“What did you do, Penny?” Names echoed in Penny’s head, Penny, Penina, Penelope, Pen, different voices saying different things, “All I asked was for you to take care of Peter…”

Crushing, violent pain rocketed through her heart, echoing in her muscles, vibrating from her pores. Aunt May had made her make so many promises before she passed, take care of Peter, give him a chance, be there for him. She’d asked for so much and Penny hadn’t been able to conform to every promise; she couldn’t take care of Peter and herself, couldn’t give him a chance and stay in school, couldn’t be there for him and also provide for him. There were trade-offs, she did what she had to.

But the look of disappointment on May’s face was overwhelming, “you’re going to die, he’ll be alone, here, in this… place.”

This place. Penny rolled to the edge of the bed opposite to where Aunt May sat, the contents of her stomach splattering against the hardwood floor. She shivered violently, almost falling off the edge of the bed. Her brain told her Aunt May had moved, the way the bed jolted made it feel like she was right behind her.

“I’m so sorry,” she breathed, eyes wide and filling with tears, “I tried to hard—”

“I know, I know,” Aunt May’s voice sounded weird, her hands were so much bigger than Penny remembered, “you tried so hard, I’m sorry it wasn’t enough. But there won’t be a next time and it’s over now.”

It was never enough. Penny tried so hard over and over only to fail, to fall short of the finish line. It didn’t matter if it was providing for her family, protecting Peter— nothing. It was too much, too overwhelming, every time she paid a bill there was another overdue, she could work every day of her life and never catch up to her debt, Peter was so sad every time she couldn’t make it to a competition or science fair but she couldn’t take time off, not when his school cost so much…

“Oh Penny,” the voice was so far away and she found it hard to listen, her brain reorganizing the words, “why did you let this happen? Why didn’t you do better? Why don’t you ever get it right?”

It didn’t matter that the words were actually meant to be comforting, Bucky and Steve having come running out of the shower upon hearing her vomit. “Its okay baby doll, I’m sorry we let this happen to you. We should have done better, I swear we’ll get it right.”

#steve rogers x oc x bucky barnes #steve rogers x oc #bucky barnes x oc #dark!steve rogers #dark!bucky barnes #dark!tony stark #dark!mcu #let's review #let's review chapter 17

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xxgoblin-dumplingxx · 5 years ago

Text

Blessed: A Thor One-Shot

Thor loved being back in the training room with the Avengers. After the Second Snap and the Blip, After Thanos. After getting his life back, it felt better. He felt better. Some of the endless pain and desperate longing lifted off of his chest.

It also brought new challenges. And Frustrations. For instance, the struggle to get his body back to what it had been. He hated to admit it but part of the reason he had adored Midgard was the adoration of its women. And Men. Now though, there was less of it and that irritated him. Still, he reflected, deflecting the team up move that Steve was doing with Tony, it wasn’t the worst. He didn’t hate his new body. He was still strong. And fast. And... And there was you. You didn’t seem to mind his soft middle. Or have any desire for that to change, as long as he was happy. And healthy. But then, you’d never seemed to notice his body before either.

And he did, in fact, really like eating. Midgardian food was leaps and bounds away from Asgard. Ever evolving. So many flavors and textures. He loved being able to sample them all.

Thor had never really known what to make of you. Not even before the snap. He admired you greatly. A Fierce warrior with a surprisingly tender heart, though, he hadn’t been meant to see that part. No one had. Thor could see that night in the back of his mind as he wandered towards the shower. It was snowing outside but that didn’t mean he wasn’t coated in sweat. And all he wanted was out of his armor and into his clean clothes. The warm water reminded him of that night, you’d found him in the shower.

He’d been hurt on a mission. Hurt and he was angry about it. Frustrated at the foolish pride that made him ignore orders. He’d charged headlong into battle and left his comrades vulnerable and scrambling for cover. Steve had been furious and that fury had been well deserved. Thor had studied the gaping wound in his side with detached interest. It would heal. He had no real need of the medical bay he knew. Only if he wanted it to heal without a scar. But this one would be a lesson. A reminder to follow orders. He hadn’t heard you behind him. Going to your locker for something from your kit. This hadn’t been your mission. You had still been healing from the last one. One where you’d put yourself in harm’s way to protect some terrified civilians.

“Thor!” You’d gasped, startled.

“Lady, Y/N,” he said curtly, wiping the blood off this side. “I see you’re recovering well.”

Your cheeks had heated and you looked away. As if he had rebuked you. As if you were ashamed you hadn’t been alongside all of them. He didn’t like that. You were a good fighter. There was no shame in being too injured to fight again. “I’m sorry,” he said, hissing as the corner of the towel brushed his wound. It stung.

You’re at his side in an instant. Unphased by his nakedness which somehow makes him feel more exposed. “May I?” you ask quietly. Thor doesn’t know why but he nods. He finds your presence oddly settling. The way his mother’s had been. “Lie down,” you instruct, “This doesn’t look bad but the creature’s venom seems to be slowing down your healing factor. You’ll bleed to death if I don’t at least put some stitches in.”

Thor complies, feeling his cheeks color. He hadn’t even realized and your keen eye had seen it in an instant. He should have known. You work quickly. Efficiently. A row of neat stitches into his side like it was nothing and he hardly felt it. He was too distracted by the freckles that dot your nose and cheeks. The way your lashes brush your cheeks when you blink. When you finish and help him sit up slowly he wants to kiss you but you’re too busy cleaning up the kit. Carefully wiping up the blood and stripping off your gloves, “You should be fine in a couple days,” you tell him, “But I’d go to medical to get them taken out.”

“Thank you, My lady,” he said, claiming your hand. “What brought you down to bring my rescue?” he asked.

“I needed my coat,” you say, not looking at him.

“Ah, you go to meet a paramour,” he teases, “one your mentor Barton doesn’t approve of.”

“No,” you snort, “Nothing that interesting.”

“For what then?”

“I have Christmas presents to deliver,” you tell him simply.

“It’s the dead of night.”

“All the better to be unseen then. Everyone should be asleep,” You smile and mischief, a childlike sweetness glows in your eyes for a moment. Infectious and warm. He can’t help but smile back, “This is a secret then?”

You wink and shrug into your coat, bundling your hair under your hat simply. “Then it will stay that way,” he chuckles, “Your secret is safe with me.”

He watched you go. Smiling to himself. He didn’t know how many gifts you had to deliver. Or where. But he knew that all over, there was going to be a little bit of magic where there hadn’t been before and the thought warmed him. Christmas brought out the best in some Midgardians. This time of year always had. The darkness drew them closer together. It opened their hearts almost as if to protect them from the horrors of the long nights. Even now. Even now that they didn’t huddle around central fires and make merry in defiance of their shivering.

Even today, years later, as Thor stripped off his armor, he wondered. He wondered if you had gifts to give tonight. If anyone had gifts to give you.

Thor couldn’t get a fix on you. Your face was unchanged but, like so many who had lost five years, time seemed sort of, meaningless. There was nothing of that childlike glee in your face and it stung in a way he couldn’t quite define. Like some fundamental piece of you. A piece of you no one even knew to miss, was gone.

“FRIDAY,” he called, “Could you call a meeting for me? Excluding the lady Y/N?”

“Certainly, Sir,” she chirped, “What message shall I give the others?”

“That we have a friend in need of assistance.”

_____________

“So,” Stark said sipping coffee, “You’re saying you want us to buy and deliver literally hundreds of thousands of gifts and deliver them to poor kids all over the city?”

“Yes,” Thor said.

“And you want us to not say one word to Y/N until we’re doing it?” Steve asked.

“Yes,” he said again.

“Thor,” Natasha cautioned, “This could end really badly. Y/N didn’t really. I mean. It wasn’t a public thing. She did it in someone’s memory. Not as a public spectacle... She’d take lists from shelters and stuff. People whose requests no one took and fill as many of them as she could then drop the stuff off Christmas Eve... It was like. A months-long process getting enough money to do all of it and then hustling to get it all bought.”

Thor frowned and nodded, “Then what do we do?” he asked.

Natasha and Bruce traded looks, “Tony,” Bruce said, “How many shelter’s lists can you get hold of?”

“All of them,” Tony snorted, “Most of them are online.”

“How many did Y/N Usually do?” Bruce asked Natasha.

Natasha sighed, “As many as she could. Usually Seven or Eight. Wherever she could find where her old Clients were, you know? Her people from legal aid. She always felt bad she couldn’t do both jobs.”

“Legal Aid?” Thor asked.

Barton nodded, “It was her other life, you know? Before she was a science experiment she was a bright little legal eagle helping get people out of shitty leases and going after bad bosses. Then the accident happened and. Well. SHIELD sent me out to go get her.”

Thor nodded, “Does anyone know why she does this?”

Natasha smiled a little, “Her Grandma,” she said, “Every year on Christmas Eve they did volunteer work.”

“Can we find the woman?”

The spy shook her head, “She’s been dead 10 years now,” she said, “Died before Y/N finished law school.”

“Why is this so important?” Bruce asked gently, mindful that Thor is getting upset. That he doesn’t understand that you might not want help.

“She is sad,” he stated simply. You had always been hard for Thor to get a fix on. Friendly but uninterested in him. He’d only gotten one small glimpse into who you were beyond your Avenging. And it made him feel like he knew you.

Tony pinched the bridge of his nose, “Look, Point Break,” he said, “You’re heart’s in the right place. Really. It is but-”

“But?” he pressed, folding his arms.

“What if she doesn’t want to be your elf while you play Santa?” Rhodey snorted.

“Wait-” Barton said holding up a hand, “Tony, how many of her old clients are still nearby?”

“Why?” He asked.

“Because what if we throw a Christmas Party?”

“Bring clients here?” Tony asked.

“Whoever we can find,” Clint said nodding.

“You do like a Party,” Pepper pointed out, nudging his arm.

“Alright!” Tony said throwing up his hands, “We’ll do it. But only because It’s two days before Christmas and Y/N has yet to bake one single cookie. And that’s just depressing.”

Thor beamed, “Excellent, now how do we keep her from finding out?”

Natasha and Steve exchanged a look and Natasha hopped off the table easily, “Pepper, Girl’s day?”

“Yes!” she gasped, “Perfect. There’s never been a bought of seasonal depression some retail therapy can’t cure.”

_____________

Thor was giddy. Actually honest to goodness Giddy with excitement. It had been a long time since he felt that way. He’d been a boy. A young boy. Back when Odin still had both eyes. Before they’d gone to Midgard the first time.

He’d been racing through the columns, chasing Loki with Fandral and Volstag on his heels. Loki had stolen his toy sword and he wanted it back. They were all laughing. Breathless with childish joy. Until. Until they weren’t. Until Odin had thundered at them to stop and ordered them taken away. Called them fools and declared them too old to act like hellions. After that there had been no more play. Only training. Only study.

This. This felt like that. It was exhilarating, knowing what was coming. Knowing that in all corners of the tower, for the first time in 5 years, a proper party was going to be thrown. His old friends and many new ones in one place. The chance to maybe, hopefully, give you back some of the magic you had made for others. It makes him feel light. And the more he sees you, the more he feels like he’s doing the right thing.

You don’t look like yourself. Not like the self he remembers. You’re quiet and withdrawn. Sad. Still nice to everyone, just. Sad. There is not Christmas tree up in your room. You aren’t singing Christmas Songs at the top of your lungs with Banner or Tony. It’s like you’re completely removed from the time of year. He hasn’t even seen you using your “Don’t Get Your Tinsel in a Tangle” mug. He’s not really sure what tinsel is. Or why it shouldn’t be tangled but, gods if it wasn’t weird. Having you back and not being carried along on a tide of Christmas Cheer starting the day after Thanksgiving.

That he doesn’t like. So, as he stands outside your door, fidgeting and holding a plate of cookies, he hopes this helps. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and he desperately wants to try and lift you out of your funk. That moment of kindness years ago still seared into his mind. The scar left on his side, paler now and stretched out with the changes in his flesh, a souvenir. A momento. Something that, over the years, he wore as a badge. A reminder of how much he’d grown.

When the door opened, you leaned heavily on the door frame and rubbed your eyes. “Are we suiting up?” you ask confused, rubbing your eyes with a too-long sweater sleeve.

“I- no I thought you might be hungry. I hadn’t seen you all day,” he says uncertainly.

You smile a little, “Do you want to share them with me?”

Thor blinks at you for a second. The messy hair. The sleepy eyes. The sweater that fell to your mid-thigh and the soft bare legs underneath. It looks so inviting. He nods, swallowing hard for a moment and following you as you stepped back.

Your room was dark but for the glow of your television and a candle on the coffee table. He knew what wallowing looked like. Seeking whatever felt comfortable. Whatever numbed the pain. He watched you climb back into your nest and snuggle into a soft white faux fur blanket. Rabbit fur, he figured it was supposed to be. It looked silk soft.

Thor set the plate on the coffee table and went to your little coffee bar, helping himself to making cocoa to go with the cookies. Warmth, he decided. You needed warmth. Comfort from another person. A real person.

He watched you flip through things to watch impassively and his heart twisted. It was Christmas films. Things you’d shown to him his first Christmas on Midgard. Kindly explaining things to him when he didn’t understand. He liked the Santa creature. And the Reindeer. He liked the songs. Men finding redemption through a simple act of giving. Love lighting the way. It was comfortable if a bit dull. “What about the Elf movie?” he asks.

“Sure,” you murmur, flipping the program on easily. Thor smiles and hands you one mug and sits carefully on the sofa. “Thank you,” you murmur.

Thor felt his cheeks color. Your voice was so genuine and soft. “You’re welcome, Lady Y/N,” he hummed, satisfied. The movie plays quietly and Thor gently hands you a cookie, “Are you cold, my lady?” he asks when you shiver slightly.

“Pretty much constantly,” you answer snorting.

“Well,” he hums, “I may not be much to look at anymore but I am, I’m told, very warm.” He grins at you and it’s satisfying when your eyes lighten just a little and you bite your lip to keep from smiling. “Come on,” he presses gently, still teasing you gently, “I won’t tell if you don’t.”

That makes you smile and you snuggle close tentatively, resting against his side with a sigh. “Thor?” you murmur after a long moment.

“Hmm?” he answers, afraid to move too much. Your cheek is resting on his belly and he’s comfortable with it. He likes knowing you’re there and cozy.

“What’s all this about?” you ask softly.

“I missed Christmas when you were gone,” he admitted, “And I miss Christmas with you now. I don’t like knowing it isn’t the same for you.”

You look up at him and he brushes hair out of your eyes gently, “I’ll be okay,” you tell him, “I mean. I’m alive. I’ve got nothing to complain about.”

Thor smiled a little, “But up here,” he said, tapping your forehead gently, “Might think that while your heart is broken. It’s okay. You can feel sad. And I’ll sit with you for a while.”

“You don’t mind?” you ask, snuggling close again.

“A beautiful woman, cookies, and some hot drinks? Gods no. That sounds like a nice way to spend a day.”

Thor isn’t lying. He’s pretty sure this might be heaven. It’s nice, holding someone. It’s nice when you doze off against him. He wraps you gently in you furry blanket and shifts you onto his lap, letting your head rest on his heart. He just lets you sleep and lets movies play. This is less about making you feel like celebrating, he realizes, and more about. About something else. About finding solace of his own. He hadn’t realized how much he’d missed you. Until you were back and just. Not the same. Until you weren’t a puzzle to him anymore. Someone for him to flirt with and tell jokes to. Someone he loved flirting with precisely because you had no real attraction to him. You were a puzzle. And now? Now you weren’t. Not long ago, he would have gotten bored. It wouldn’t have been fun to watch you sleep. He’d have pressed buttons until you fell into his arms and begged him to fuck you until you were a mess of trembling limbs and bodily fluids. And there may come a day where he’ll be blessed with the opportunity to do that for you. But now? Now he wants you to rest. He knows what it feels like to be dragged down by the weight of a warzone in your mind. How it feels to FEEL so unworthy that you can’t bring yourself to do anything but lie there and rot. Because you deserve it. You deserve this suffering.

When you stir, nuzzling his chest and making some of the cutest sleepy confused sounds Thor had ever heard, He chuckles. “You snore, you know,” he hums affectionately.

“I’m sorry,” you murmur, cheeks heating.

“It’s cute,” he reassures you, chucking you under the chin, “How do you feel?”

“A little better,” you concede, “I forgot how nice it is to have someone to cuddle.”

Thor tilts your chin up gently and brushes his thumb gently against your cheekbone, “I’m happy to be of service,” he breathed, feathering a soft kiss against your forehead. Careful not to press for too much and mindful that you are, in fact, a lady in truest fashion. Your affections are not given, they are earned.

“I like you better when you’re not being an asshole,” you tell him, wrapping your arms around him.

“Was I?” he asked, slightly surprised.

“Yeah,” you sigh, “Always so loud. And kinda mean to me.”

“Mean to you?” he frowned, He didn’t like that. He didn’t like to think he’d ever been mean to you. Even not meaning to.

“You laughed at me a lot,” you murmur, face heating.

“I thought you were funny,” he said, tucking a lock of your hair behind your ear.

“But I wasn’t kidding.”

He chuckled and sighed, “And that, dearheart,” he says, “Is why you’re funny. Hearing you yell ‘Jesus suffering fuck, Stark,’ over comms made me laugh so hard one day that I very nearly fell right out of the sky. I didn’t expect such things to come out of a mouth that sweet.”

You snort, “Clearly you weren’t paying attention.”

“Oh but I was,” he hums, shifting you over slightly to straddle his hips and resting his hands on your lower back. “Especially after the night, you patched me up.” He doesn’t move his hands to ride up your sweater or seek the silk of your skin. He can feel you heating under his hands and he doesn’t want to push. He just wants you closer to him and he likes having women straddling his lap. Even with his belly in the way, he decides as you snuggle close and lean against him. “Such gentle hands,” he praised, taking them in his gently, “So soft. And so skilled. You’re blessed, dearheart, and we’re blessed to have you.”

When you tear up, and he pulls you gently closer, he holds you tightly, “Shh,” he soothes, “Please no tears, my lady. I mean that sincerely. And I want you to know that your mind is lying to you. Come to the Party with me tomorrow?”

“I don’t know Thor,” you murmur.

“Please?” he pleaded uncertainly, “You don’t have to stay all night. If you get tired we’ll leave. We’ll come back up here and I’ll tuck you into a mountain of soft furry blankets.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

__________________

Thor decides as he watches you sip a glass of champagne and try to stay out of sight that he likes you in red. Your red sweater, bought by Natasha, is soft and looks warm. It suits you.

Clint catches his eye and jerks his head towards the main room, prompting him to herd you in. Thor, over your quiet protests, sweeps you into the other room, excited, he said, to show you the tree that he helped pick out. It doesn’t take long though, for your surprise to be unveiled.

Kids, and their parents. People who grieved you. People who knew you as a friend. People you had grieved yourself, were waiting for you. And in that moment, together, as they hug you and everyone is having trouble fighting back tears, one of your kids, now almost grown takes up a song.

Have yourself a merry little Christmas Let your heart be light From now on your troubles will be out of sight.

Have yourself a merry little Christmas Make the Yuletide gay From now on your troubles will be miles away.

One by one, voices join that one child until everyone is singing the words back at you. It fills the air in ways that Thor has never heard before and won’t hear since. It’s a thank you. It is a welcome home. It is an I love you all in one.

Here we are as in olden days Happy golden days of yore Faithful friends who are dear to us Gather near to us once more

Through the years we all will be together If the fates allow Hang a shining star upon the highest bough

So have yourself a merry little Christmas Have yourself a merry little Christmas So have yourself a merry little Christmas

Thor doesn’t know the song, but it doesn’t matter. As he watches the tears fall down your cheeks, all he knows is that this might have been what you needed. It might have been the reminder you needed that the things you did had mattered. That you had fought. And died. And people had noticed.

He pulls you gently into his side and uses his sleeve to wipe the tears off your cheeks tenderly. “Merry Christmas, my Lady,” he rumbles, kissing your forehead.

“Merry Christmas, Thor,” you murmur, cheeks heating as you wrap your arms around him.

Tags: @lancsnerd @etherealwaifgoddess @blameitonthecauseway @thorfanficwriter @stevieang

#Thor Odinson #Thor x reader #thicc thor #fluff #angst if you squint #hurt/comfort #Christmas #christmas party

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thorne93 · 5 years ago

Text

Unforeseen Chasm (Part 25)

Prompt: Two sisters fall for men that are absolute enemies. The love they have could tear all of them apart, or it could bring them together.

Word Count:1107

Warnings: argument mentioned,mentions of betrayal,abandonement

Note: This is by far the longest thing I’ve ever written (including my novels). It’s a collaboration with the amazing @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo. It started as a funny “What if…?” and it evolved and got huge. This took two years to write. We are both proud and happy and we hope you enjoy it. It follows from Thor 1 to Endgame in the MCU. Some of the timelines may be off in order to fit certain people, and some characters may show up earlier or in different ways than they have in the movie. But for the most part, it follows the MCU. It also has a bit of crossover with some other Marvel characters throughout the story.

Masterlist for Unforeseen Chasm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later the next night, Shannon came down with some equipment that made you curious.

“What’s all this?” you asked, excited to see her. It’d only been one day, but it was too many hours since you’d seen her.

“A little gift,” she informed with a smile before opening up the cell. She didn’t make you or Loki stand back. Probably because Loki was already in the office, and you were just a few feet from the entrance.

“Oh?”

“Mhm.” She sat her things down and began working. She pulled off the control panel on the box near the entrance.

“You breaking us out?” you asked with a joking laugh.

“Not just yet,” she replied with a small smile.

“So… how are you and Tony?” you carefully asked, hoping you weren’t overstepping your bounds. Ironic, seeing as two years ago, you could’ve immediately bombarded her with any questions about Tony and she would’ve obliged.

She shrugged. “Better… Apparently he didn’t get much sleep while I was gone, but to be fair, neither did I,” she admitted. “It’s hard not sleeping next to him, but sometimes it’s harder knowing he can be such a jackass,” she muttered while she worked. “Does that ever happen with you and Loki?” she wondered.

At first, for a split second, red flags went off in your head. Why would she be inquiring about you and Loki? Was she trying to divide you two? Was she trying to get you to open up about weaknesses in the relationship?

But then, you realized, she was just making conversation. She wanted to get to know Loki, and although you weren’t one-hundred percent sure that was the reason, you had vowed to try and trust her back. Trust was a two way street.

“Uh… I’m not sure. We only fought once while we were on Sanctuary. I was begging him to stop the takeover, but he reminded me that we literally had no choice. If we didn’t do it, Thanos would kill everyone we loved, make us watch, and then kill us.” You toyed with your fingers as she listened patiently. “We did just fight about you though.”

Shannon frowned slightly and put the cover back on the control panel before going over to another one in the cell, where you followed. You recalled the small argument you two had. Loki was happy that Shannon was back in your life, but of course he was paranoid about it as well.

“Me? Why me?”

“Loki doesn’t exactly trust you, but I told him he was being ridiculous,” you summed up.

“Well… he is a trickster, it’s in his nature to think everyone is like him, and that everyone is looking to betray him. From what I read of your letters, it sounds like he had good reason to, too.”

“What do you mean?” you asked, surprised she took his side.

“Well, he was raised for over a thousand years to believe he was Asgardian, had a shot at the throne, all for it to be one big lie. His father abandoned him, left him to die on a rock… His adoptive father withheld the truth of his true nature and why he took him for his entire life… His friends, who were Thor’s, treated him badly and the second they got a chance to rat on him, they did. Thor’s a good guy and all, but I can see how he treats him differently, not as his equal. You said it yourself that Thor tried to kill the Jotunheims, right?”

You nodded.

“And Thor was exiled, then hailed a hero… Loki did the same thing and Odin told him no. I mean, even the attack on New York. Yes, it’s shitty. Yes, you two are basically terrorists… But even then, does that measure up to half the bloodshed Odin and Thor caused?”

All you could do was think. You tried to remain neutral for the last couple of years… but when she put it like that, you really understood Loki’s feelings now. You understood them, and sympathized before, but now… Now it seemed as though it was obvious why he felt the way he did.

“Not to mention, I am a spy. Loki isn’t stupid. He’s cautious. He calculates everyone’s motives, actions… Nat got the best of him on that helicarrier and I don’t think he liked it.”

A small laugh came tumbling out of your lips. “No, no he didn’t. So you’re not… mad?”

She put the cover on the control panel and picked up an electronic tablet.

“Mad at a man who felt overlooked his entire life, and then was exploited because of it? Mad at a man who is only looking out for you? Mad at a man that is only trying to make sure you’re not hurt again?” She handed you the tablet. “No, I’m not.”

To hear that somehow made your heart warmer. Maybe there was hope for all of his afterall. You being friends was great, more than you deserved, but if you could get her and Loki to see eye to eye then you’d be on top of the world.

“What’s this?” you asked.

“Wow, Asgard really did spoil you,” she teased. “This, is a tablet.”

You rolled your eyes. “I know it’s a tablet, Shan. What is it for? Tony said we couldn’t have internet access.”

She shrugged. “You don’t. This is just a one-way chat and video device for you and me. It only connects to me and my devices. You can’t get out onto the internet with it. Think of it like a walkie-talkie.”

“Oh, wow,” you said, holding it as if it were the Holy Grail. “So I can just… talk to you anytime I want?”

She grinned and nodded. “Mhm. You can reach me in the lab, or while I’m out running errands. I can show you the park. We can text late at night...”

You fought back tears. “Shannon, this is… this is great. Thank you. Some actual contact with the outside world.”

“Anything I can do to help. You need anything l can get while I'm here?”

“More clothes?” you asked with a slightly nervous laugh.

She returned it. “I'll see what I can do. Does Loki want anything in particular?”

“Other than an all black suit, no. I think some green shirts and jeans will be fine,” you assured with a smile.

“I’ll work on it. It was good to see you,” she said, nodding at you and smiling.

“Yeah, you two. Thank you so much for all this. It means a lot.”

With that, she gave you a friendly smile and left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag List: @essie1876 @magpiegirl80 @letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked @iamwarrenspeace @marvel-imagines-yes-please @superwholocked527 @missinstantgratification @thejemersoninferno @rda1989 @munlis @thefridgeismybestie @bubblyanarocks3 @igiveupicantthinkofausername @kaliforniacoastalteens @feelmyroarrrr @kaelingoat @friendlyneighbourhoodweirdo @damalseer @heyitscam99 @yknott81 @sorryimacrapwriter @glitterquadricorn @xxqueenofisolationxx @little-dis-kaalista-pythonissama @bittersweetunicorm @alyssaj23 @sea040561 @princess76179 @thisismysecrethappyplace @sarahp879 @malfoysqueen14 @ellallheart @breezy1415 @marvelmayo @random-fluffy-pink-unicorn @cocosierra94 @hardcollectionworldtrash @capsmuscles @marvelloushamilton

@paintballkid711

Loki: @lostinspace33 @ultrarebelheart @lenawiinchester @esoltis280 @tngrayson @wangdeasang @harrymewmew @jayfantasyatyourservice

UC:

@lokis-high-priestess

#unforseen chasm #unforeseen chasm #loki x reader #loki fic #Loki Laufeyson #tony stark #tony stark fic #tony stark x ofc #mentions of thor #mentions of odin #mentions of thanos

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dearlazerbunny · 5 years ago

Text

Lie to Me (Ch. 12 of 28)

Pairings: Loki x Reader

Genre/Ratings: M eventually (aiming for a slow burn here); warnings for kidnapping and subsequent anxiety/PTSD (will be marked before every chapter)

Words: 3200

Summary: If you had to guess what the captured, traitor, trickster god Loki Laufeyson wanted or needed at this moment, a babysitter would be far, far down on the list. (Set after the events of Avengers 1.)

SHOUTOUT TO @molmcb and @jessiejunebug for their encouraging comments, which are currently posted-noted to my wall

Requested Tags: @deraniel@iamverity@yasnooshka24@wegingerangelica@themusingsofmany @dark-night-sky-99@tarynkauai@stuffandstuff-stuff @angelicshinigami@my-current-fandom-is @geekysimmerthings

“You’re shaking.”

“Gold star, Trickster,” you mutter, dumping your stuff onto the table unceremoniously and heaving yourself into your chair.

“What is wrong?”

“Nothing. I’m just peachy,” you drawl, mimicking the tone of Loki’s own bitter sarcasm.

Loki sits up a little straighter, apparently to get a better look at you through the glass- you, in your disheveled uniform and messy hair, trying to hide the tremble in your hand as you heavily write the date at the top of today’s paper. His eyes narrow. “Are you- drunk?”

“God, I wish,” you mumble, half heartedly hoping the all-seeing camera won’t pick up your voice. “At this point just wildly hungover.”

“What is wrong?”

“Nothing,” you snap. “Just- start talking about something. Quietly, please, my head is pounding.”

“If I talk, will you tell me what is wrong?” You’re so agitated you don’t notice he does in fact lower his voice.

You shake your head roughly, scrubbing your hands across your face and eventually resting it in your palms. “Ugh. Jesus. Can we just get this over with, please?”

He launches into some story about when he and Thor were young, which are usually your favorites, but today you just sit there quietly with your head in your hands, half ignoring Loki’s soft tones emanating through the room. You forget about taking notes. Eventually your shoulders loosen, just a little, but everything still hurts when the tale finally comes to an end.

God, it hurts.

“Witling,” he says softly, looking concerned, and you hate that look of concern because everyone has decided to look so goddamn concerned about you today-

“Don’t tell me you’ve never self-medicated,” you snap. “What, with that stuff they’ve got on Asgard? Bet it’s a lot easier to drown out your problems with that than the shitty crap I can afford.”

His eyes glow at your words. “Did someone hurt you? Are you hurt?”

Your hackles raise even higher. “No-”

He switches his train of thought on a dime. “SHIELD doesn’t pay you well enough to purchase top shelf? A shame.”

That earns him a small smile. “I know, right?” The both of you sit silently on your opposite sides of the room for a few minutes. Loki doesn’t look at you, or ask any more questions- he just sits there patiently, fingers folded together in his lap, humming something that sounds vaguely ancient and haunting.

“You know how I told you I have a brother?” You don’t lift your gaze from your metal table, eyes tracing the faint lines etched into it.

“Yes.”

“Well, I don’t. Anymore. He’s dead,” you say bluntly. “Yesterday was the anniversary.” You laugh, but it’s short and harsh and completely devoid of any mirth. “What a shitty thing to have an anniversary for.” At first you think he hasn’t heard you, because he doesn’t respond for a long time. But when you look up, he’s staring at you with clear pain in his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he says, and you huff.

“Yeah. Me too.” You pick up your pencil and try to fiddle with it, but your shaky hands betray you and it clatters to the floor. You leave it there.

“How did he die?”

“Car crash,” you spit out. “Late night, stormy skies, slick roads, drunk driver. The whole shebang.” Your voice shakes at the end, to your annoyance. “It was a fun time.” Loki doesn’t seem to know what to say to that, and really you don’t expect him to know. You still don’t have any way of dealing with the memories that all slam you one particular night of the year other than get drunk off you ass and try to drown them out. “Why do you hate him?”

“What?”

You look up, holding his gaze. “Thor. Why do you hate him?”

The god releases a small, controlled breath. “I-”

“Because he’s your brother,” you interrupt, and you don’t even really notice the rage that’s building in your chest. “He’s- he’s your brother, and he loves you, and you… you hate him.”

“Thor-”

“Loves you,” you repeat through gritted teeth. “And wants to help you. He still does, after all the shit you’ve done. He fights SHIELD on a daily basis to get you out of here even though it’s basically moot at this point.” You scoot your chair back with an unholy screech, giving you more space to breathe. “And you stab him in the back on like, any given Tuesday, and he just fucking stands there and laughs because he loves you.”

“I never-”

“Oh, don’t lie to me,” you throw at him. “I could pull any given story out of your file and there’s a ninety percent chance it involves you trying to kill him in some way.”

“Do you have a point.” Loki’s voice is colder than ice. His breath should have little crystals hanging in the air around it.

You’d probably wipe away the tears tracing their way down your cheeks if you weren’t so busy staring at the man across from you with such accusation. “You constantly throw away one of the best parts of your entire life. You take it for granted. Like it’s nothing. Do you know- do you know what I would give to have my brother back?” He opens his mouth but quickly shuts it when you stalk up to him, practically putting your nose right up to the glass. “And you have yours. Your brother IS ALIVE AND HE LOVES YOU AND ALL YOU WANT TO DO IS STAB HIM IN THE FUCKING BACK!”

At this point, the door to the room opens, and a few well-armed SHIELD agents enter hesitantly but quickly. “Agent,” one of them says. “You need to step away.” He goes for your arm but you wrench it away, causing your fist to thud against the glass barrier in front of you. Despite being behind layers of reinforcement, Loki bodily jumps back a few inches like it was aimed at him.

“Don’t fucking touch me,” you hiss, angrily closing your eyes against the torrent of tears now flooding your face. When you open them, Loki can see they are red-rimmed, and the brokenness in them makes him want to punch something as well. But he’s frozen, staring at you as you break down in front of him.

“Shit,” you mutter. You scrub your eyes. Stand up straight, turn to the guards, who clearly aren’t sure if they should try and grab you again. “Just… leave me alone.” Without another word, you walk out, not looking behind you once. The guards follow. Once the door is shut, and Loki is alone, he very carefully sits back on his bed, gripping the edges until his knuckles are white. He does in fact notice the small tear that decides to appear from the corner of his eye, but wipes it away before it can fall.

You can’t really see through your tears, so you just trust that people are going to get out of your way as you barrel down the hall. You don’t know where you’re going, exactly- no, strike that, you do, it’s somewhere with lots and lots of alcohol- when you are stopped dead in your tracks by a large palm square on your shoulder. It isn’t forceful, but you definitely can’t push past it.

“Thor,” you mutter. “Really not the time, just-”

“I am sorry,” he says, his voice low for such a big guy. “About your brother.”

“And I’m sorry about yours,” you reply thickly.

He makes a noncommittal noise. “Do not be. Loki is…” he trails off though, and never finishes his sentence, like even he isn’t sure what his brother is anymore.

“How do you do it?” You put a hand up to his, which is still on your shoulder, intending to remove it, but it ends up gripping his wrist instead. “Why do you…”

Thor smiles sadly. “He is my brother, is he not? And it is what brothers do.”

A sharp bit of anger dissipates somewhere deep in your chest. “Yeah. It should be.”

Me: You should set up a consistent posting schedule!

Me to me: Keep them in sUsPeNSe

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hackedmotionsensors · 6 years ago

Text

Here we go Endgame lets talk about it!

BELOW THE CUT

So I’ll say this!!! Over all!!! I liked it a lot. For a lot of reasons.

I also HAAAATTTEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDD a lot of some of the choices. That’s okay. We can have mixed feelings about movies especially the end of a saga. I think they did a good job of getting nods where they needed nods, bringing in storylines from previous movies and conversations that needed to happen.

And they fucking whiffed it on at least THREE REALLY IMPORTANT THINGS!!!

So lets start with what I liked.

1) STEVE TONY EVENT. DO YOU HEAR ME IT WAS A STEVE TONY EVENT aaaah oh my god. From the second Tony lands back on the planet and Steve RUNS to him before even Pepper and he’s holding him and just the look of agony as Pepper takes him away and the fight where Tony says ALL THE SHIT WE HAD BEEN SAYING!!!! WHERE WERE YOU! YOU LIAR!!! and he RIPS HIS HEART OFF OF HIS CHEST AND GIVES IT TO STEVE BECAUSE YOU FUCKING BROKE HIS HEART YOU FUCKING FUCKED UP STEVE!!!!! FUCKK!!!! And then reconciling because “Resentment is corrosive” UGHHH!!! And Steve just barely containing himself when Tony shows up ughh!! UGHHH!!!!!!! AND THE ASS JOKE!!! THERE’S NO HETEROSEXUAL EXPLANATION ABOUT THAT!!!! TONY SAW STEVES ASS AND WAS LIKE TAN FRANCED IT LIKE BITCH YOU NEED AN FRENCH TUCK OF MY DING DONG IN YOUR BUTT!!! and Steve over the intercom being like “omg tony not in front of the kids” AND A STEVETONY SOLO MISSION!!!!!!

A STEVE TONY...

SOLO

MISSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TONY CALLING STEVE MY MAN WOW. WOW. FUCKING EXCELLENT ON ALL ACCOUNTS THANKS SO MUCH!! I was given some bread thank you I will eat this stevetony bread nom nom nom nom nom.

2) Tony’s arc in this story was really beautiful. He finally got what he wanted, some perspective and closure with Howard. And I know initially you want to go “Hey Howard was really abusive” and yeah he was. But its complicated. Because Tony even says in Homecoming he was trying to break the cycle of abuse and he DID with Peter and Morgan. You can see just HOW MUCH he cares for his daughter and he was willing to say fuck you to the UNIVERSE in favor of not losing her. Its always a different perspective when you see your parents as people and not as YOUR PARENTS.

Also Tony lying on the table with Natasha UuU. A lot of the interactions with Tony and the other characters were so good. Tony and Rocket. Tony and Nebula. Tony and Carol (tho brief). Tony arguing with Pierce like his little gay senses were like “This guys a nazi I bet”

3) I genuinely liked the Time Heist. I DID NOT LIKE THE RULES OF TIME TRAVEL IN THIS MOVIE BUT I’LL GET TO THAT. But I looooved the Time Heist. From the New York stuff with Steve fighting Steve and knowing his dumbass loses his shit when he hears things like “Bucky’s still alive” and being done with his own stupid shit “I can do this all day” “YEAH I KNOW” (which btw at this point was basically the last thing he said to Tony in Civil War so maybe that doesn’t have its plucky little fire anymore and now is a sore spot). I loved Loki running away with the Space Stone (even tho as of now I’m still not sure what the FUCK THAT MEANS!? more on that in a sec) Loki making fun of Cap. Loki rolling his eyes at Odin. Tony dressed in a shield outfit screaming Medic!!! The gang all on the elevator and Hulk screaming about it and LOKI WAVING HIS HAND AT THE HULK AS THE DOORS SHUT!! TONY SITTING ON THE BRIEFCASE! SCOTT GOING “how the FUCK did you not know they were Hydra LOOK AT THEM They’re a COP!” Then jumping forward to the 70s and Steve’s legs that went all the way up to his asshole and Tony dressed as a doctor

I drew a doodle of it here you go lol I’ll post it properly later

oh did this not happen? Idk what movie you were watching.

4) The big battle at the end was SO FUCKING COMIC BOOK I WAS LOSING IT. Also I keep calling it the Battle of Five Armies or Return of the King lol T’challa BATHED IN A HALO OF LIGHT LIKE YES WE STAN A KING. MY WIFE

MY.

WIFE!!!!!!!!

VALKYRIE!!! ON HER BEAUTIFUL WHITE HORSE!!!! (also not being given an actual name and called Valkyrie is the funniest goddamn thing. Like that’s like going into a Footlocker and talking to the manager but calling them Manager)

CAROL!!!!!! WITH HER BUTCH ASS HAIRCUT PUNCHING THANOS IN THE MOUTH AND WRECKING HIS SHIT

WANDA FINALLY FUCKING FLYING. LIKE. F L Y I N G. THAT is what the Scarlet Witch is SUPPOSED TO DO!! SHE’S SUPPOSED TO BE SO POWERFUL IT TOOK EVERYONE TO TAKE HER DOWN CMON!!!!!! And she almost got him too. Honestly if it were down to Carol and Wanda they probably could have ended Thanos alone.

Korg coming back for more comic relief AND PUTTING HIM IN TAIKA’S PINEAPPLE ONESIE!!!! ARE YOU KIDDING.

5) This is controversial. And I know it won’t age well. And that’s okay and feel free to disagree with me entirely.

But I liked Fat Thor lmfao. I know it was played as a joke for the wrong reasons but I laughed. I was like fuck yes his belly looks like mine and that’s not why it was funny and it SHOULDN’T BE but I laughed lol. But on the other hand I think it had partially to do with Hemsworth constantly being like “no no we don’t need a shirtless scene” or just sort of a gag at how Marvel always has a shirtless scene and its just kind of funny to have it not be someone cut. EVEN THOUGH its a fat suit and I can’t take off my fat suit but Hemmy can and that’s kinda shitty.

but I laughed. I can’t help it. He was a whole ass mess and I thought it was funny. And I know there are Thor fans out there who wanted more for him but like I said before this was a SteveTony event. This movie and this win worked because it was Steve and Tony finally coming together again.

It felt honestly the most comic book Avengers of the entire series.

And true to comic book events

it whiffed the landing.

Before I get into dislikes I’ll say that I liked this movie more than I disliked it. I cried H A R D at the end of the movie. Because its not a movie that’s an on its own kind of movie. You had to have gone through the journey to get here. The pay off is completely lost if you only watch this movie. Or you only watch one or two of the MCU. Or if you’re like a few people I’ve talked to where they only like Steve and Tony. Or they only like Thor and Loki. Or they only like the Guardians and hate the avengers. If you have hate in your heart for any of these characters the payoff of this movie is pretty much lost.

The theme of this movie is clearly about moving on when things come to an end. When things stop or end or we lose people we love you have to move on. Steve says that at the beginning of the movie to our apparent gay representative straight director Joe Russo.

But like Tony said before.

Steve’s a fucking liar lmfao

But lets not start there. Lets start with the fucking timeline.

I hate.

I H A T E EEEEEEEEE TIME TRAVEL!!!!!! AS A PLOT!!!!!!! WITHOUT ANY RULES!!!!!!!!!

I enjoyed what we SAW of the Time travel but the rules itself DIDN’T MAKE ANY FUCKING SENSE.

So when they’re suiting up Hawkeye for the test run Bruce explicitly says that all these movies that say “if you go into the past and fuck up the past you fuck up the timeline and the present/future is fucked because you’ve changed things”

ARE WRONG. HE SAYS THEY ARE WRONG. He says “If you go into the past. The past becomes your present. But the present then becomes your future. So you can’t go back and un fuck your parents to make you. Or kill baby Thanos. because that happened and you can’t change that but you can change youre present”

WHICH DOESN’T

MAKE ANY

FUCKING

SENSE. BECAUSE THEN YOU AREN”T TIME TRAVELING!!!!!!!!!

If you go into the past yes YOU are in your present but the world is still being written around you STILL so you go into the past and change something (loki making off with the space stone) that’s CHANGED. You’ve created a new reality.

THEY EXPLICITLY SAY THIS IN DOCTOR STRANGE AND Y’ALL I KNOW DOCTOR STRANGE WAS BORING AS HELL BUT IF YOU’RE GOING TO USE TIME TRAVEL AS YOUR STORY DEVICE THEN YOU CAN’T SAY THAT SHIT IN DOCTOR STRANGE DOESN’T WORK WHEN YOU’VE ESTABLISHED IT AS THE RULES OF TIME TRAVEL.

THE ANCIENT ONE EVEN SAYS “you create a new reality. And it fucks shit up”

LIKE!?!?!??!

WHAT THE HELL!!!

So now Loki has the time Stone in reality B, in reality A Steve goes back and puts the stones back where they belong (and I guess.....gives the soul stone to Red Skull????????? wouldn’t you try to get Natasha back????like that itself is a whole movie of Steve going back and putting things away but ??????)

And then we get to the end of the movie where Steve says Fuck you to Peggy’s reality A family and now on this timeline where they’ve time traveled he lived an entire life WITH Peggy but like.......you were Captain America and you just said “No don’t worry about JFK being assassinated. Or the Civil Rights movement. Or stopping Bucky in any capacity. Or maybe saving MLK. Or Peggy continuing to join SHIELD. Or stopping ACTUAL NAZIS from infiltrating SHIELD.

Because if you go with this idea that Steve went back and “lived a life” What did he DO then. What did he FUCKING. DO?

You’re not Steve from 1940s going back to 1940s. You’re Steve form 2019 going back to 1940s. No wifi. No medicine. No cell phones? Gays are still being persecuted. You can’t drink from the same fountain as black people (or rather they can’t drink from your white fountain).

You are.

CAPTAIN.

AMERICA.

and you just said nah fuck it its fine? This shit can all happen but I don’t super care because I get to dance with Peggy. Peggy who on her own had this whole life. Who did all this stuff IN YOUR NAME IN YOUR HONOR. Who married someone else. Who had a FAMILY. Who had a NIECE that you made out with. And just..... wha....

Like if he had gone back and danced with her but came back with Natasha in exchange for the soul stone but during his travels had aged. Or met someone else.

Like movie wise and story wise I get wrapping up Steve’s story. And maybe the person Peggy is talking about in the video of her in TWS is actually Steve from 2019. Maybe that’s it. But it still doesn’t make sense because they FUCKED UP THE RULES OF TIME TRAVEL SO WHO THE FUCK KNOWS.

So. lol I wasn’t a huge fan of Steve at the end of the movie. I know they needed to do something to end the movie with a finality. With Steve being DONE. But instead of finality or closure I just have so many goddamn questions. And I don’t hold it against Evans or even really the directors per say. But I’ll blame Markus and McFeely because they were writing since TWS. They HAD the Cap STORYLINE to write about and that was how they ended it.

its like when you pack for a very important trip and you plan out all your outfits but then wake up late and end up throwing whatever you can find into your suitcase and run out the door.

It felt final and not final.

But I’ll tell you this. From my perspective and obviously I’m going to skew it this way because its me and FEEL FREE to disagree with me.

He left because Tony and Natasha were dead. The two people that he felt the closest to (sorry Sam, Bucky and Sharon [who we didn’t even see as dusted wow]) were gone. Natasha and Steve had become a brother and sister. He would always come back for her clearly. Trying to cheer her up as she’s crying. Natasha understanding Steve’s feeling of being lost. Tony inspiring and fighting with Steve. Like that’s part of what I liked about this is taht you could really feel how Steve and Tony needed each other for this to work but also they needed to not hate each other.

Also I kinda knew the second Scott said “That’s a one way trip!!” before the 70s bit that Steve was going to stay in the past lol What an asshole.

Also I don’t think it was very UN-Captain America because I think people don’t always realize that a lot of the inspo for the MCU came ALSO from Ultimates. And if Ults Cap was able to go back to the past he would have in a heartbeat. Who was a more depressed Cap? Ults or MCU? I just don’t know.

Now.

Natasha.

This was another one I kind of saw coming from a mile away as soon as it was just the two of them on Vormir. I was kind of hoping they’d Hawkeye a way out of the deal by like throwing his daughters picture or something like that. Or that it would be Hawkeye. But they both had an upcoming movie/series so I didn’t know which way it went.

And then there was that big jump. And I was like oh my god they did it right

AND THEN THEY FUCKING DIDN’T.

Wow. Wowwwwwwwwww

Markus and McFeely

REALLY DID THAT

THE RUSSO BROTHERS REALLY DID THAT

THEY DID THE SAME FUCKING SCENE TWICE.

The first time you get because Thanos is a dick and abusive and he would absolutely throw his favorite daughter into the soul pit (which I guess Isn’t picky because she didn’t love him back she hated him but I guess its a one way street with the ol’ soul stone)

And they don’t say during that one (far as I remember) that its a permanent exchange.

But they sure emphasized this time. And they sure killed the original avenger who was the only girl on the team. Who never got a chance to live.

Who Whedon made herself call heself a monster because she can’t have a family and then she gets a found family and then SHE DIES. THEY KILL HER. AFTER HAVING A FAMILY.

WHAT THE FUCK. Like...my problems with Scarjo aside (which are similar with my problems with Paltrow) You DID. BLACK. WIDOW. FUCKING. DIRTY. I don’t care that there’s a movie coming out that was her story. You were supposed to give her a fucking story. And now her story is only how she relates to her TEAM OF MEN.

And now to my last point that I didn’t like. And I don’t hate this one as much as Steve’s ending or Natasha’s ending.

I don’t like that Tony died. I know this is wrapped up in a lot of emotions I have about Tony Stark the character. Robert Downey Jr the person. Tony Stark the character in all his forms is very important to me and I love that he has many forms. 616, Ults, AvAc, Avengers Assemble, the MCU. But his story is important to me. And its heartbreaking. I’m tearing up a bit now writing this out.

I’m just the type of person that hates that a character, in a fantasy setting where you have wizards, valkyries, robots, talking raccoons and trees, Dave Bautista, a giant green rage monster wearing chinos, that you have to take this one part and make it realistic. That we have to keep realism kill this character off because it doesn’t make sense if someone doesn’t die. Because the stakes aren’t high if you don’t make them personal as well.

Which is true like you don’t have high stakes (the planet or universe getting dusted) if you don’t are about some of the people in that universe personally.

I just would have rather he had retired. Moved onto his little farm with Pepper and Morgan.

I think they did right by Tony. Storywise, ending...all the stuff the dropped the fucking ball on with Natasha and Steve they gave to Tony. And on one hand I get it and I appreciate that because (sorry to nat and steve fans truly) I care more about Tony. Tony started this whole thing. In a miracle of accidents they got the right actor, the right story, the right character, the right director, the right timing technology wise, the right social mood and made solid gold. And none of this would have happened if it weren’t for that amazing accident that happened.

And I think it has more to do with not wanting to let go or move on even though i can always go back to Iron Man 1 at any point and start the journey over again and have a laugh but there’s always going to be that ending where its final. Its done. Its over. And in the simplest of terms. I don’t like it. You have to know when to bow out and I respect and appreciate that. I don’t wanna see Iron Man 8 with geriatric old RDJ trying to fumble into a mocap suit.

I understand. I appreciate. But I don’t have to like it as a person. And that’s okay.

Its all about moving on isn’t it? That’s the theme of the movie. Moving on.

Even if you’re steve and your moving on wipes out the existance of a whole other family lmfaaoidnsfasfada sorry sorry.

Okay. yeah that’s all I think I can think of. I’m sure there’s a ton more other people have mentioned aside from what I wrote. Like its a LONG movie and I think its hard to say hey “they fucked this up” or “they got this right” for EVERY SINGLE THING. There were so many characters. Nebula’s story could have been better. Thor’s story could have been more involved. Hawkeye could have been more important throughout the series. Janet could have come back for the final fight and healed Tony. Like there’s a ton of “this COULD have happened” But it didn’t. And that’s okay. It may not be right but its okay. I think they wrapped it up as best you could while still making a good movie. I think you probably can go back after a long while and look at the Endgame and go yeah that wasn’t so bad for an ending. Endings are hard to do with any sort of skill. Its why the joke that the third movie always sucks.

There’s still a ton of stuff to look forward to.

Falcon/Winter Soldier, Loki, Hawkeye, Wanda and Vision (i GUESS??? lol), Black Widow’s movie.

Maybe Steve solved more than he let on who knows. WHO KNOWS. Maybe Mjolnir left him haflway through the journey when she knew he was going to ditch his 2019 family (who again....mostly dead now)

I love Tony 3000. Which I found out is more than a ton which makes Morgan Stark a lot smarter than I am lmfao

#avengers: endgame spoilers #endgame spoilers #avengers endgame spoilers #spoilers

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shieldedsouls · 5 years ago

Text

this largely covers information in terms of thor learning of and dealing with loki’s mortality. mostly this has to do with thor’s perception of their relationship, but touches on his relationship with frigga as well as her assumed death.

tw for: death, death mention, faked death, anger issues

please message in private if i missed something or you need an extra tag !!

aside from a couple of groups such as the asgardians and olympians, there really aren’t any immortals within the nine realms

jotunns are part of the mortal stock, and i’ll get back to this in the next segment

thor and loki are raised believing they are of the same blood, that they are siblings in every way and they therefore both have eternity to see through together

while it does not go unnoticed that loki sort of ages and grows differently, no one in their group thought much of it beyond general teasing

it DID make thor more protective of his sibling than he might have otherwise been, which really pulls together on how much he still cares in the future after things go wrong

even when he does first find out about loki’s heritage, he’s more angry about the fact they were lied to and trying to calm his sibling down than he is focused on what exactly that means for loki’s lifespan

thor is dealing with so much else happening at the same time that he doesn’t have the ability to process this until much later on.

it isn’t for some time after loki’s fall from the broken bifrost that thor really mourns that his sibling is gone, that he won’t be getting loki back because mortals simply do not pass in the same way immortals can choose to. as far as thor knows, that moment is it, that’s the last time he’s ever going to have a sense of his sibling being around.

then loki shows up again, in midgard of all places, and with a dangerous weapon but something is off about the whole thing and thor is going to find out what so he can bring loki home. loki does a bunch of really shitty/stupid things here, but ultimately he’s unharmed as far as thor is personally concerned, and he’s able to successfully bring his sibling back to asgard in one piece without a terrifyingly heavy reminder loki will still die one day

then loki is imprisoned, and that turns into a sort of new status quo. when thor isn’t off cleaning up messes in the nine, he is trying to get loki’s sentence changed, or trying to visit ( often being blocked permission one way or another by odin ), though he doesn’t have the chance to do either as much as he would like.

when malekith shows up, thor is already trying to deal with protecting jane and figuring out what to do with the aether

frigga actually does a huge amount of emotional damage to him at this point, using an illusion of herself and jane to distract malekith and keep the aether away from him

thor doesn’t find this out until much later, and his grief is very raw and real as he’s spending time thinking she chose to pass on in order to protect jane and the nine

this is why he ultimately still goes to loki and breaks him out

despite them both being very fragile in a lot of ways because of frigga’s decision, thor appreciates getting his sibling out of the damned cell and giving loki an opportunity to prove themself, a chance to protect the nine like thor has always thought they were meant to: together

the plan of apparent treachery goes off beautifully and jane is safe, but thor gets thrown about a bit more than he had expected to

he doesn’t get a chance to tell loki to run before his sibling is being killed by the same person who seemingly killed their mother and thor cannot handle that much loss in such a short time

literally the only reason he gets up and doesn’t absolutely fall apart at this point is because he has to stop malekith, he has to protect the nine to the best of his abilities, or his family’s sacrifices will mean nothing and he can’t disappoint their memories like that

by the time the whole problem with the aether is wrapped up, thor is quietly carrying his grief and realises in that moment he cannot accept becoming king, not for a very long time at least, because all he sees in this set of experiences is where he failed to protect. his only duty up to this point is to protect and defend the nine and its inhabitants, and not being able to save his mother or sibling shakes him to the core so vividly that continuing to protect others is all that will hold him together.

so when odin ( coughdisguisedlokicough ) offers the throne, he can’t accept it. thor feels this desperate need to make up for not being able to do enough for his family, and he retreats into his duties again, buries himself and his pain in saving others, because if he doesn’t, all he’ll want to do is mourn.

when thor finally does find out/realise frigga and loki are both alive, though both hiding in very different ways, he is angry. angry with them for lying, for leaving, and in many ways he handles both situations like a petulant child would.

he throws a fit with frigga, complete with tears and “ how could you do this to our people, to father, to loki and me ” because she’s one of the only things both he and loki care about in equal measure in the entirety of existence

it’s very purposeful to include loki in every mention of himself, because as far as he’s concerned, frigga truly sees them as siblings still the same way he does

he does not do this in public however

this happens in private where she’s been hiding on midgard, resting and recovering from extensive use of her magic

and she ends it with a promise to return home eventually

with loki he exposes the lies with threat of bodily harm and somewhat childish “ yes you are/no i’m not ” kind of banter, outing him in front of everyone

he keeps frigga’s living a secret, tells loki when they are alone because his sibling deserves to know but he won’t reveal her to all of asgard without her being ready to return home to back it up

as for the future, and how thor could or would handle loki dying: he can’t. Straight up, end of story, cannot deal with the fact he is going to one day lose his sibling and it will be real and painful.

every illusion gets him every single time, because thor stops processing beyond oh my stars loki is dead that’s my baby sibling and i couldn’t protect them even though he knows loki cannot live forever

loki might seem to be playing it as a game, and maybe to them it is, but thor’s reactions are always genuine and raw for this reason

he tries very hard to internalise his grief the way he can with most other things, but it has always been different when it comes to loki

and when it comes down to it, there are so many possibilities of how loki is going to pass. It could be in front of him, in battle, of sickness, they could be realms apart; anything could happen, and the thought always terrifies thor

if loki actually dies and it’s in battle, the first thing thor is going to do is beg them to stand up and reveal it as an illusion

that the fight is over and they’re okay they can get up now, that he won’t even get mad this time

the more gruesome/scarring the death, the more hysterically thor responds

thor holding his sibling’s body and literally crying for hours

electricity gathering in the air around them, storms rolling in that are the worst the region/world has seen and he just stays there cradling loki and apologising for not being able to keep them safe

if loki dies from illness or simple old age, thor is there the entire time and is helping them do even the most basic of tasks in hopes that the saving of energy will keep his sibling alive just a little longer

thor taking every jibe and mean word without trying to argue back because he’s just glad loki is still talking at that point

he still cries, so much, because losing his sibling was never going to not hurt

thor making sure to get loki a proper funeral on asgard, the way all their people are supposed to be honored

to welcome them home one last time, to have asgard see his sibling

and never in all his life will thor wish he could follow someone to whatever comes after death, mortal or immortal

#death tw #death mention tw #faked death tw #anger issues tw #( in the storm | headcanons | thor )#[ there's a lot to their relationship #and its Complicated ]#[ but thor really and truly loves loki #to the very core he does ]#( assembled anthology | all headcanons )

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mrs-dragneel-stark-solo · 5 years ago

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Unforseen Chasm (part 25)

Part 25 of Unforseen Chasm

Prompt: Two sisters fall for men that are absolute enemies. The love they have could tear all of them apart, or it could bring them together. Word Count: 1107 Warnings: argument mentioned, mentions of betrayal and abandonment Note: This is by far the longest thing I’ve ever written (including my other fic series). first major Collab with my best friend @thorne93 what was first a simple “what if” moment turned into a two year writing session and I’ve never been more prouder of myself than when i started my first series. goes through most of the MCU plots there are some changes to accommodate for what we wanted and there is a bit of a crossover between the MCU and other characters. I hope you guys enjoy reading this just as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Later the next night, Shannon came down with some equipment that made you curious.

“What’s all this?” you asked, excited to see her. It’d only been one day, but it was too many hours since you’d seen her.

“Oh?”

“Mhm.” She sat her things down and began working. She pulled off the control panel on the box near the entrance.

“You breaking us out?” you asked with a joking laugh.

“Not just yet,” she replied with a small smile.

“Me? Why me?”

“Loki doesn’t exactly trust you, but I told him he was being ridiculous,” you summed up.

“What do you mean?” you asked, surprised she took his side.

You nodded.

“Not to mention, I am a spy. Loki isn’t stupid. He’s cautious. He calculates everyone’s motives, actions… Nat got the best of him on that helicarrier and I don’t think he liked it.”

A small laugh came tumbling out of your lips. “No, no he didn’t. So you’re not… mad?”

She put the cover on the control panel and picked up an electronic tablet.

“What’s this?” you asked.

“Wow, Asgard really did spoil you,” she teased. “This, is a tablet.”

You rolled your eyes. “I know it’s a tablet, Shan. What is it for? Tony said we couldn’t have internet access.”

“Oh, wow,” you said, holding it as if it were the Holy Grail. “So I can just… talk to you anytime I want?”

She grinned and nodded. “Mhm. You can reach me in the lab, or while I’m out running errands. I can show you the park. We can text late at night...”

You fought back tears. “Shannon, this is… this is great. Thank you. Some actual contact with the outside world.”

“Anything I can do to help. You need anything l can get while I'm here?”

“More clothes?” you asked with a slightly nervous laugh.

She returned it. “I'll see what I can do. Does Loki want anything in particular?”

“Other than an all black suit, no. I think some green shirts and jeans will be fine,” you assured with a smile.

“I’ll work on it. It was good to see you,” she said, nodding at you and smiling.

“Yeah, you two. Thank you so much for all this. It means a lot.”

With that, she gave you a friendly smile and left.

Unforseen Chasm Tag list- @reigningqueenofwords @oldfreakything @weclassygirl @adefectivedetective

@dontbetooobvious

Tag list- @cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you @winchester-writes @winchesterenthusiast @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog @sammysbuttcheek @misz-adrii @sandlee44 @womanxofletters @natsuccs @childishhoebinoo @expecteddifferent @girl-next-door-writes @fanaticfanfiction @dakotapaigelove @sassy-spn-knight-of-hell

#unforeseen chasm #unforseen chasm #loki fic loki x reader #loki laufeyson #tony stark #tony stark x ofc #tony stark fic #mentions of thor #mentions of odin #mentions of thanos

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iamanartichoke · 5 years ago

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Oh man.. I went to see endgame again and I want to like Thor in this movie I really do and am worried I'm a bad person for not but like, the tone feels all over the place with him, like the tragedy undercuts the humour but then the humour disrespects the tragedy. I can't get my head around this creative decision. What do you think?

First of all, you’re not a bad person for not liking Thor in this film. The negative reaction to how Thor is portrayed is pretty widespread, especially on Tumblr, and a lot of people share your opinion that his character was handled poorly.

I ... *sighs* Here’s the thing. My immediate/general reaction was something like being stunned and second-hand embarrassed for Thor and really upset at the portrayal, because it really, really does feel like the narrative is framing Thor’s very real PTSD as a joke. Playing it up for laughs when there’s nothing funny about that level of loss and grief.

I felt it was disrespectful, that it undermined not only Thor but those of us who suffer from mental illness and have unhealthy coping mechanisms. I felt like depression was being made fun of, like trauma was being made fun of, like weight gain/generally showing how far a person can sink into depression where they can’t take care of themselves was being made fun of. Furthermore, I have been especially furious that despite his trauma, Thor didn’t mention Loki even once, even when acknowledging literally everything else he’s lost besides Loki (family, Asgard, Jane).

But.

Everyone knows, because I have been obsessing about it for days, that I’ve discovered some really, really good during/post-Endgame Thor fic. Fic that manages to strike the balance between what we saw on-screen and what’s going on in Thor’s head. I have found fic that somehow manages to reconcile the two, showing how deep Thor’s trauma runs while still being consistent to what was portrayed on-screen.

And in finding myself not only empathizing with Fic!Thor, but also feeling very protective of him and generally loving toward him, it also made me admit to myself that, when I watched Endgame, it was like two days before the release and I was watching a really shitty cam rip, where I missed 75% of what was really happening, due to poor sound and visual quality.

So, tonight, I went back and rewatched it. Not in the theatre but I found a better cam version on Putlocker, with much better sound and video. I tried to be open-minded. And I had no idea how much I missed, when it came to Thor’s microexpressions and mannerisms and even what he was saying half the time. Watching it in better quality along with having the fics in my head has kind of ... brought me to an understanding of it, I think? In a way that I’m no longer furious about it, because I can sort of get behind the creative decision to show Thor just completely deteriorating and becoming something like an entirely different person than what he’s been before. Because mental illness and trauma do do that to a person. And I do think that it was a bold, but not necessarily a wrong, decision to go the opposite way in portraying the illness than what is usually shown in media. Usually, in films and tv, traumatized, depressed people are portrayed as stoic, and usually really thin, and scowly and brooding.

Thor in Endgame as a concept is taking that expectation and subverting it and showing the other end of the spectrum: that sometimes you are smiling and joking even though it’s an act, that you’re laughing on the outside while a weight is pressing down on you on the inside, that drinking to excess can cause weight gain, that eating as a coping mechanism can cause weight gain, that not caring about life can mean not caring about yourself and you don’t necessarily notice that it’s been a week since you washed your hair and two years since you cut it and what does it matter anyway, because you’re not going anywhere or doing anything or trying to impress anybody, you’re just putting one foot in front of the other and trying to make it through day by day until the universe finally decides to take pity on you and you die.

And I get that, because I’ve been there, because a lot of people have been there, because it’s a very real, uncomfortable, visceral portrayal of someone who has just completely broken down - mentally, physically, emotionally.

That all said - I understand the intention better now than I did before, but I do think that it fell flat. Instead of really delving into these things, the narrative played it like we were supposed to laugh at Thor. Not a single person, except for Bruce, asked Thor if he was okay. No one acknowledged that Thor might not be up for this mission. No one acknowledged that even if the snap was reversed, Thor will still have lost everything and he doesn’t get anything back.

Thor is very visibly breaking down, and the others just roll with it. Worse, they make fun of him, what with the way they look at him and the way they act toward him and Rhodey’s stupid “cheeze whiz” joke. The narrative supports this view, especially with camera shots that emphasize Thor’s weight and general disheveled appearance. And the version I watched today was still filmed in a theatre, so I was able to hear all the places where the audience just laughed, even when Thor was obviously in pain and obviously needed sympathy rather than mockery. It smacks of fat shaming and general mental health shaming. And that’s not okay.

I feel ... more generous toward Chris Hemsworth’s performance than I did before. On a second, closer viewing, I do think that his facial expressions and his delivery of his lines did show someone who was in deep pain, especially when it came to Thanos specifically (his change in demeanor when Bruce says his name, the way he begs to wear the gauntlet and “do something right,” the way he approaches Thanos in the final battle, among other moments).

I also think, though, that Chris may have gotten too into the comedic aspect of it, too, and that probably contributed to Thor in general being played for laughs. Because Chris likes to laugh, and have fun, and screw around, and he’s said so himself. I think if Chris had a better understanding of mental illness than I assume he does, he might have been more willing to delve further into the emotional side and relied less on the comedic side. And if Chris wasn’t so anti-Loki, then I think we would have had a lot more acknowledgement of how much Loki’s death has contributed to Thor’s grief and mental state.

Idk. It could have been better. The fics are better. But at the same time, I do get it now more than I did before. I’m not really crediting the Russos with that, bc they’re trash, but I do give Chris Hemsworth and his acting more credit than I did. And honestly, I give the fic writers credit bc reading them forced me to consider my point of view and whether or not I was looking at Thor too critically due to my general hatred of everything the Russos touch.

So, yeah. Overall, it’s ... a complicated thing. I don’t think I’ll ever be okay with it, but I’m not so anti it either, anymore. If that makes sense.

I didn’t mean to write you a dissertation, Anon, so I’m sorry for the length. This has actually been on my mind for several days, though, so I kind of hopped on this ask and took it as an opportunity to write all of this out. I hope it makes sense. I hope people can understand where I’m coming from. And even if you can’t, please don’t @ me, I’m very tired.

Anyway. Yeah. So that’s what I think. I hope this somewhat answered the question. XDD

#asks #charlotte replies #endgame #charlotte bitches about endgame #endgame thor #tw fat shaming #tw mental illness #anti russo brothers #chris hemsworth critical #but also #chris hemsworth positive #a nonny mouse

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imagine-loki · 5 years ago

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Yes Mistress

TITLE: Yes Mistress CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 29 AUTHOR: angryolwet ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine after a heated argument with Thor, Loki turns himself into a woman out of spite. RATING: Mature/Explicit NOTES/WARNINGS: NSFW, This is a F/F BDSM relationship. If that’s not your cup of tea, don’t drink it. The events in this fic take place before the first Thor movie.

I AM SO SORRY THIS CHAPTER TOO SO LONG TO UPDATE!!! I meant to post at my usual time but I got very sick at the end of last month and ended up with vertigo for a few weeks as well. If any of you have ever had it, you know reading a computer screen is the last thing you want to do. Not unless you’ve got a bucket handy.

*****Trigger Warnings!!! This chapter deals with descriptions of child abuse and shitty parenting, (not Odin’s for once) and those parts are contained within the asterisks below.*****

You don’t super need to read that part for the chapter to make sense if it’s a sensitive subject for you, but it will give you an insight into Sanna’s family dynamics and those will play into the overall arc of this fic. Yes, there is an arc. And a plot. Despite my best efforts.

Kanelbullar - twisted cinnamon buns

Also on AO3

Slowly, Sanna came back. She felt the softness of the blanket and the sensation of someone stroking her face before her eyes opened.

“Can you hear me Pet?” Loki asked softly.

“Yes Mistress,” Sanna answered dreamily, smiling up at her.

“My good girl. Our meal has arrived. Do you think you can sit up for me?”

Sanna eased herself up and shivered as the blanket slipped down. She pulled it back up and looked at her Mistress.

“It’s alright Pet. You can bring the blanket with you. It’s time to eat.”

Loki got off the bed and stood up, holding out a hand. Sanna took it, wobbling a little when she stood. Loki held her until she was steady, rubbing her back in small circles as they left the bedchamber.

“Thank you Mistress,” Sanna said as she wrapped the blanket more tightly around herself.

“You’ll be warm soon Pet,” Loki tucked a loose tendril of hair behind Sanna’s ear. “You used up a good deal of energy during your edging. Eating will help.”

“Um, Mistress? Before we eat I need to–” Sanna broke off, poking a hand out from the blanket and pointing across the sitting room.

“Of course, Pet.”

Sanna headed towards the bathing room to use it’s facilities while Loki sat on the divan to inspect the contents of the covered dishes on the table. She had just started cutting slices off a rolled joint of spit roasted mutton when Sanna came back out, wrapping the blanket snugly around herself again.

“That was quick,” Loki remarked when she sat down next to her.

“I was inspired, Mistress. The bathing room is rather cool, even with the shielding up.” She rubbed her hands together in an attempt to warm them.

Loki reached out and took her Pet’s hands in hers.

“You are chilled,” she began to rub Sanna’s hands between her own. “Shall I light the fire? I never notice the cold myself, though I’ve heard Thor whine about it enough. You’d think we were on campaign in Jotunheim instead of camping in the forests on a hunt.”

The image of Prince Thor covered in snow and icicles made Sanna giggle.

“I’m alright Mistress. Truly.” Sanna took back her now warm hands and started making up her Mistress’s plate, cutting slices of bread for both of them. “I believe you are right and I just need to eat something. And it has been raining on and off since midday,” she looked out at the damp night and shivered a little under the blanket. “The weather can’t seem to decide if we’re in spring or summer.” The gentle afternoon showers of Garth’s prediction had given way to a cold, soaking rain once the sun had set.

Loki made a face. “All too soon it will be summer and nothing but heat, heat, and more heat.” She loathed the thought of summer, but it did give her an idea. “One day, we should go riding to one of the shaded pools that hide deep in the royal forest. Mmm… Stripping down and diving into fresh, cool water. Tell me Pet, can you ride? Or swim?”

Sanna paused from buttering the bread she’d just cut and turned to her Mistress.

“Hmm. Do you know, I don’t think I've ever been on a horse in my life. Although I do have a vague memory of trying to ride a goat once when I was very small. I remember being frustrated because it wouldn’t hold still long enough for me to get on…” Sanna paused, fiddling with the butter knife. “No. I’m sure I haven’t. We didn’t use them on the farm and none of the neighbors were horse breeders. We did have a rather old and rather surly grey pony that Old Frederick would use to pull the cart when he went up to the manor house for supplies. He was the only person in this realm that animal tolerated, it would bite everyone else that came near.” She resumed her task.

“And I could swim as a child, Dagna saw to that. I haven’t had much chance to since I left our house to serve Lady Audney. There was a wide, slow moving river not far from our farm. I used to go and sit in the shelter of a large tree on it’s banks whenever–” Sanna broke off.

“Whenever what Pet?” Loki paused and looked over. She could see her Pet was upset by the memory.

Sanna chose her next words carefully and blew out a breath.

“Whenever I’d run out of the house. It seemed like everyday I’d be scolded by our mother for one thing or another. Mostly for not getting my chores done properly. She would never let anyone be idle,” she paused and swallowed. Composing herself.

*****

Her mind was flooded with the memories of repeating tasks over and over again until they were done to her mother’s satisfaction. One particular memory –one she’d tried very hard to forget– came suddenly to mind. A memory of scrubbing the stone floor of their house one winter for almost the entire day. It was just before Yule. Her mother had been perpetually unsatisfied with her efforts, even ‘accidentally’ spilling things on the floor for her to clean up. Sanna’s back had ached. Her knees were bruised and her knuckles had cracked and bled. Her hands were numb from the water that had gone cold and she kept dropping the big scrubbing brush, making it clatter on the stones and drawing her mother’s attention to her.

When Dagna had come in from tending the animals outside and saw what had been going on, she’d been furious. Sanna would never forget the sound of her sister slapping their mother’s face and the horrible words they screamed at each other. Sanna had never heard her sister raise her voice in anger to anyone before. She had hidden under the table, curled on her side to make herself as small as possible until the row was over. The bucket she’d been using to scrub the floor had been knocked over near her at one point, but she’d been too afraid to move. She’d stayed still as the freezing water soaked her dress and hair. Wet, cold, and filthy. Hands pressed to her ears, sobbing, trying to drown out the noise. She still hated the sound of angry shouts and raised voices to this day.

Eventually their mother had left the house to go tell their father about what her sister had done and said. While she was gone, Dagna had coaxed Sanna into coming out from under the table. She’d filled the big bathing tub by the fire with warm water and and had helped her get into it, washing her gently and rubbing her sore back. Then her sister had helped to get her into a clean night dress and wrapped her in a blanket. Dagna applied a salve to the cracks on Sanna’s hands before feeding her and putting her to bed.

The whole time Sanna had been terrified and started at every sound, thinking it was their mother returning. She knew her sister must have been punished terribly for striking their mother– it was all Sanna’s fault– but she couldn’t remember how or what had happened for nearly the rest of that winter. At the end of the following spring Sanna had left the house to work for Lady Audney.

But her Mistress didn’t need to know any of that. Or that her mother’s 'scolding’ was usually accompanied by a blow of some kind. Sanna’s pride and her fear would never let her tell her sister, let alone her Mistress. She’d promised herself all those years ago that she would stay silent and do better, no matter what. Never to complain and create more trouble. She wasn’t about to break that promise now. And besides, it was over and done with and would probably just upset her Mistress.

*****

“When it became too much, too heavy to bear, I would run out of the house. No matter what direction I ran in, I always seemed to end up by the big tree near the river. Eventually Dagna would come and find me. Once my tears were dry, she’d take me back. Sometimes we’d go swimming in the river first if it was warm enough. She wanted me to know what to do in case I got too close to the bank and fell in.”

Loki’s face was unreadable as she said solemnly, “I would so very much like to meet your sister one day. It seems she was the only source of happiness or tenderness in your childhood.”

“Oh no Mistress! Not the only source. Our father was quite kind, when he could spare time for us. The farm keeps him very busy, though I now suspect some of that work is to keep him out of the house and away from mother. In the summer he would take us fishing at the river– I mean Dagna and me, Mother hated the river– and we’d laugh and scream and splash each other once the three of us were done hauling in the nets.” Sanna smiled at the memory. “We’d walk home smiling and laughing, soaking wet with that day’s catch.”

She was eager to tell happier memories, she’d had no one to tell them to since she’d left Lady Audney. Marit was sweet, but she had no interest in any form of rural life and had quickly changed the subject whenever Sanna had mentioned her time in the country side.

“I remember one time, Father took me with him on a trip to a neighboring farm. The man kept bees and we went to collect a big crock of honey in exchange for some of our hay. I must have been very young. Probably around the same time I tried to ride the goat. Father lifted me up into his lap and kept me from falling off as he drove us over there and back. He even let me have a spoonful of honey on the way home and made me promise not to tell Mother.”

Sanna looked at her Mistress from under her lashes. “That’s where my taste for it comes from. It’s always been a sweet, secret treat.”

“Mmm… Perhaps I should keep a small jar of it here and let you lick it off me as a reward for your obedience?” Loki purred.

Her Pet blushed a bright red and squirmed on the divan while whispering, “I wouldn’t object if you offered it in any form, Mistress.”

Loki had finished cutting up the meat and divided it between their plates.

“Good to know. Open.” Loki popped a piece of the mutton into Sanna’s mouth.

“Mmm… This is almost as good as Dagna’s. She uses garlic in the dredge.”

“Alright. Now I must meet your sister.”

They both burst into laughter. Once the plates were ready, Loki pulled Sanna over to straddle her lap and tucked the blanket around her. Holding up a bite of meat to her Pet’s lips, Loki asked absently, “Perhaps I shall have Brynhild create a robe for you? Would you like one Pet? In gold and sapphire blue silk, I think? Jewel tones seem to suit you.”

Chewing and swallowing the meat gave Sanna time to think. She offered her Mistress one of the roasted vegetables pieces from her plate and said, “I will wear anything you wish me to, Mistress. I’ve never had one before.”

“I suspect there are a lot of things you’ve never had before, and I mean to give them to you.” Loki promised solemnly, making her Pet blush and duck her head.

“Now Pet, tell me.” Loki held up more food to Sanna’s mouth. “How was your day?”

They fed each other. Sanna spoke of meeting Garth and being reminded of how much she loved planting things and watching them grow. How far she had gotten through the play her Mistress had recommended and what she thought of it thus far. Her initial nerves at being summoned to tea with the Allmother and her relief and joy at finding her Mistress’s mother to be kind and attentive. Loki listen to it all with rapt attention, asking questions and laughing where it was appropriate until the meal was finished.

_________________________________________________________

“So you got on well with my mother then, Pet? Not frightened of her anymore?” Loki teased popping the last bite of her kanelbullar into her mouth and licking her sticky fingers before wiping them on a damp cloth.

Sanna, slightly indignant, finished her own and sucked at her fingers as she replied, “Well, she is the queen after all. And I wouldn’t say I was afraid of her so much as afraid of disappointing her.”

She wiped them off and stood up, gathering up the used plates and cutlery before refilling her Mistress’s goblet and her own with wine and getting comfortable again. She leaned against her Mistress and tucked her feet up under the blanket on the divan. Sanna wasn’t chilled any longer, but the material was soft and felt wonderful against her skin. Loki wrapped her arm around her Pet, pulling the girl close and put her own feet up on the table, long pale legs exposed. She used her seidr to send the uneaten food and dirty plates back to the kitchen. They sat in a comfortable silence, sipping wine.

After a moment or two, Sanna spoke. “The Allmother is so kind. I confess, I do want her to like me. Oh did I tell you, I mentioned to her that I had a wish to improve my stitching and she’s promised to have one of her handmaidens teach me. And I’m to come to tea with her again in a three days, if you can spare me that is.” Sanna looked at her Mistress with pleading eyes.

Loki sighed and toyed with a tendril of her Pet’s hair that had escaped it’s plait, wrapping it around her fingers. “Oh, I suppose I can get by without you for one afternoon.”

Sanna leaned up and kissed Loki’s cheek and settled back down against her. “Thank you, Mistress.”

The comfortable silence resumed.

After a few more minutes had passe, in which Sanna had nearly been lulled into sleep by the good food, strong wine, and the calming presence of her Mistress, she glanced up and saw her Mistress with her head tilted back and her eyes shut.

“Are you tired?” she inquired.

Loki opened her eyes and looked at her. “Hmm? No Pet, not really. But my head does ache slightly. I think I read for too long and sat too still in the Archive today. My body is no longer used hours of inactivity. As a child I could sit and read for hours without noticing the time pass. Now, what was once a joy has become a chore and I’m already starting to resent it.”

“Perhaps you’re striving to achieve too much too fast Mistress? You have years before you are expected to take on your new role. There’s no need to push yourself so hard.” Sanna chided gently.

“Oh, that’s not what I was doing Pet. After I spoke with the Allmother, a new idea came into my head and I put away all of my work to start a new project. It concerns a school of seidr I’ve woefully never bothered to learn. Tell me Pet, did Lady Audney ever speak to you of her role at court?”

“Lady Audney?” Sanna started at the sudden change of topics. “Well, no. Not really. She taught me courtesy and what would be expected of me as a handmaiden to a Lady of the court. She rarely talked of her life before. I think it reminded her of her son, the one she’d lost, and that always gave her pain. She couldn’t bear to hear his name said aloud and never used it herself. She’d just say 'my son’, and even then it was usually in reference to something he’d done as a child, never as a man grown. I can’t recall her ever speaking of Lord Morten. We got supplies once a fortnight from the manor and I know they were from him.”

“Do you know what happened to him Pet? The son that died, I mean.” Loki asked.

“I know he was killed in a terrible accident. That’s all anyone would say. But what does Lady Audney have to do with divination?”

“Quite a lot according to my mother. She wasn’t a seeress herself, but she could inspire and strengthen visions in others who were. Do you recall yesterday, when we went into my storage area downstairs and you found my old cradle? Do you remember what were you thinking of when you touched it?”

Sanna reached out and set her now empty goblet on the table and sat up, turning to face her Mistress. Loki did the same, stretching her arm across the back of the divan.

“Well I– I don’t know. I was thinking of a lot of things then. Mostly what you must have looked like as a baby–” Sanna broke off and flushed a dull pink.

“What else Pet? I know you’re holding something back. I can tell by the blush on your face,” Loki prodded her.

Sanna tugged the blanket back around her shoulders, as if trying to armor herself against her embarrassment. “I… I was thinking,” her blush got deeper and stretched from her hairline down to her chest. “I was thinking about… what it would be like… to… to have a baby. Your baby Mistress.” She ducked her head and bit her lip at her guilty admission.

Loki removed her hand from the back of the divan and lifted Sanna’s chin to look at her. She took both of her Pet’s hands in her own.

“What exactly Pet? Being pregnant or nursing or rocking it in the cradle? What image formed in your mind?” Loki pushed again. “It’s important.”

Sanna heaved a sigh. “I think it was mostly just what our baby would look like and rocking it to sleep.”

“No image of nursing it at your breast?”

“No. Why? What is so important about this?” She was embarrassed and uncomfortable at the unending questions.

“I had a vision while we were down there. When I turned and saw you touching the cradle I staggered for a moment, do you remember?” At Sanna’s nod she continued, “I didn’t say anything then, because I wasn’t sure what had happened. I’ve never had visions before, or any aptitude for divination so I’ve never studied it, but I know now that I had a vision of you.”

“Me?” Sanna squeaked. She was dumbfounded, her eyes were large as she stared at her Mistress.

“Yes Pet. You were in your little room and sitting in the chair I sent up here. I saw you from the doorway. The cradle was at your feet but it had been freshly polished. The room had been painted and was filled with the things needed to care for an infant. You were nursing a black haired babe at your breast. You looked older than you do now. I heard you humming a soft melody and saw you smile at the child. It was the same smile you had on your face while touching the cradle. That’s why I asked what you were thinking of.”

Sanna was speechless and kept staring. The blush had left her face and she had gone very pale.

“I’ve only just started to research the subject and I still have much to learn, but I believe you may have the same ability as Lady Audney. You might be the reason for the vision, not just the subject of it.”

“Me? What? No! I don’t– How? How can I–” Sanna sputtered. She was dumbfounded. Had all the reading today somehow damaged her Mistress’s mind?

Loki continued on as if her Pet hadn’t spoken.

“I used my seidr on you, the first night you slept beside me. Do you remember a dream of us sitting under a tree beside a river? My telling you to raise your skirts? You woke in the middle of the night and I found you freezing yourself in the bathing pool. I used a spell to enter your dreams.”

Sanna’s blush came rushing back at the memory of the dream and what had followed it. Of her Mistress pleasuring her in the safe place of her childhood. She wasn’t sure whether to be angry or ask her to do it again… But her Mistress was still talking.

“…and that’s why I had to know what you were thinking of. If the same images were in your mind and mine, it might have been a hold over from that spell, or some accident of my seidr and not truly a vision at all–”

“Wait! Just, just wait a moment! Please?” Sanna pulled her hands from Loki’s grasp and put them to her own head. “Does this mean I am going to have your child at some point in the future?”

“I– Honestly? I don’t know. I think what I saw was a vision of a possible future, not necessarily the future we will have. Probably. Like I said, I haven’t ever properly studied the subject. And it’s not something I can walk up to the Allmother, or any other seer, and just ask. Not even as a hypothetical question.”

Sanna slumped back against the divan, her mind whirling. Abilities she might have and hadn’t known existed. A possible baby in her future– well she wanted that… didn’t she? It was too much to take in. Her head throbbed.

“Mistress, can we please talk about something else? Anything else?” Sanna pleaded and rubbed at her temples. Loki’s hands replaced her and she sent a tiny burst of seidr through her Pet’s head, soothing it as Frigga had done for her earlier in the Archive.

“Of course Pet. Would you like me to distract you from your thoughts?” Loki had moved the book of plays her Pet had been reading off the table when the servant had brought in their meal. It was sitting next to her, half tucked under one of the cushions on the divan. She pulled it out and held it up. “Shall I read to you?”

“I thought you’d had enough of that for today?” Sanna was beginning to feel like herself again, and her instinct of caring for her Mistress was making her feel less stupefied.

“Well, there is one other thing I can think of.” Loki shot a lecherous smile at her Pet and offered a hand to her. Sanna didn’t hesitate to take it.

#Loki #Lover #Angst #Submitted fic #submission #yes mistress #angryowlet #chapter 29

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areiton · 6 years ago

Text

losing by degrees

Title: losing by degrees

Prompt: R5 (Fix-it) for @tonystarkbingo

Tag Warnings: post-apocalypse, post-Infinity War, mute Peter Parker, drinking to cope

Word Count: 7k

Summary: He looks around, and Strange’s grip on him tightens, so slightly he doesn’t even realize it. “Where is he?”

The Avengers are all here--Loki clasped in Thor’s shaking embrace, Sam quiet and too close to Bucky, both avoiding Cap’s gaze. Wanda is there, a gaping hole near her where Vision should be.

They got them <i>back</i>, Tony thinks, giddily, tears stinging in his eyes. And the calculations he and Bruce had played with worked, Lang got them back and brought them <i>here.</i>

So--“Where is he?” Tony demands again, shriller this time.

A/N: I wanted to post this before Endgame released and I barely missed that but tomorrow is the official release day so here. Have a fix it, and hopefully if the movie breaks our hearts, this will ease the pain a bit.Heads up that Peter is voluntarily mute in this and Tony has (per usual) shitty coping mechanisms. There's your word of warning.

AO3 Link

~*~

When they undo it, and get back everyone Thanos took--the first thing Tony does is punch Strange in the jaw.

“You bastard,” he chokes, and Strange gives him this look , like he understands, some, what Tony is feeling.

The desperate clawing panic that took him when they crumbled away, the same thing that’s kept him company in all the time since, while those left behind fought and prayed and gambled.

He looks around, and Strange’s grip on him tightens, so slightly he doesn’t even realize it. “Where is he?”

The Avengers are all here--Loki clasped in Thor’s shaking embrace, Sam quiet and too close to Bucky, both avoiding Cap’s gaze. Wanda is there, a gaping hole near her where Vision should be.

They got them back , Tony thinks, giddily, tears stinging in his eyes. And the calculations he and Bruce had played with worked, Lang got them back and brought them here.

So--

“Where is he?” Tony demands again, shriller this time, and he sees Loki stir in Thor’s arms, pull away from the god.

“Stephen--”

“Hush, Mischief,” Strange murmurs, and it registers as odd. Distantly, so distantly, it registers as odd.

Because panic is clawing in again.

They got them back.

Everyone.

Except there’s a empty space at his side, and a crumbling weight in his arms and ash choking him.

His voice sounds like a scream when he demands, once more, “Where is Peter?”

~*~

It went like this:

Thanos undid half the population of the universe.

He stole billions.

And Tony didn’t care.

He wanted it undone, wanted to drag Thanos into the dirt and beat him bloody, until he was nothing but so much crushed meat--but it wasn’t for the universe.

It wasn’t even for his team.

It was for a boy, just one, who stared at him with terrified brown eyes and begged to be saved.

He didn't want to save the world this time. He just wanted Peter back.

Now--staring at the world he almost died ( again ) to save, it feels like a cruel kind of irony, the sickest joke.

Because he did it. They did it. And Strange is looking at him, the same patient, too knowing look that he gave Tony before he crumbled away on Titan, and he knows what it means, knows.

FRIDAY has been scanning the billions they Restored since Tony came out of the sedation Cap forced on him when Tony realized that the boy wasn’t there.

“Any luck?”

“No, Boss,” she says, and he hates the distress in her voice.

Hates her for not actually feeling that distress.

“Tony,” Strange says, “you need to trust me.”

Tony laughs.

It’s the first time in longer than he can remember, and it feels like glass cutting his throat. “Last time I trusted you, he died in my arms,” he spits and takes a vindictive sort of pleasure in the flinch that Strange gives him.

“He’s not dead,” Loki says and Tony’s eyes narrow, watching the trickster approaching Strange.

“Loki,” the Sorcerer sighs. “We talked about this.”

“Yes, and I disagreed with you,” Loki snaps.

Tony, his patience, already thin and frayed, snaps, “ Explain.”

~*~

The world didn’t recover from the Snap well.

There was grief, of course, but there was more than that--there was fury.

Earth was hurting, half of its inhabitants dusted into nothing and of those who weren’t, another three percent were killed immediate aftermath. Within twenty four hours, fifty three percent of the world was dead , and the remaining forty-seven were furious.

There was rage at the governments who did nothing, trusting a handful of superheros to save the world again.

Rage at the super heroes who didn’t .

Rage at the ones who lived and rage at the ones who died, and in the end--the world tore itself apart.

Thanos killed half the universe to create a utopia and Tony isn’t sure how it shook out on other planets--but by the time he and Nebula limped back to earth, the chaotic anarchy that greeted him resembled a dystopia far more than anything else.

They lost.

They were still losing, by slow degrees.

~*~

Loki explains, in fits and starts, with Strange filling in gaps and snapping at him.

The dynamic is strange, something Tony recognizes but can’t really wrap his head around. Because what it boils down to is--they killed Thanos.

They did--Strange and Loki and Peter, his brave beautiful boy.

Because Thanos didn’t kill half of the universe. He stole them, tucked them in a pocket reality and spun out a life where Titan was still whole and happy and his daughter played at his feet.

He stole them and built the world he wanted, and it might have worked, if Peter and Strange and Loki had been alone.

But they weren’t.

They were together, when they died, Peter and Strange, and they woke together. They found Loki and dragged him along to kill a god.

“We had to take the stones,” Loki says. “But it wasn’t just that--we were in his reality, and we had to break that. Had to rewrite the time we were gone, and restore the souls trapped by Thanos--we couldn’t just destroy them, you understand?”

Tony stares at him, at the pleading in Loki’s eyes and the resignation in Strange’s.

“What--what are you saying?”

“Someone,” Strange says, bluntly, “had to wield the stones. Someone had to take their power, and rewrite what Thanos did, while you and the other survivors did your part to bring us back.”

“Someone,” Tony says, thickly. “Peter. You mean Peter.”

Strange nods, and Tony crumples.

~*~

It goes like this, for a long time--

Tony drinks.

He drinks because being sober means realizing that his kid, his Peter sacrificed himself for the whole goddamn universe, and that was never what Tony wanted.

He drinks because if he doesn’t, he has to watch Cap with Bucky, coaxing him back to life, has to watch the whole world coming back to life, and he can’t fucking handle that.

He likes the anarchy, likes the distrust and hate and rage that seethe just below the surface.

People don’t trust the governments and they don’t trust the Avengers, and most don’t trust him , but they’ll take his free power and his free food, they’ll take the water purifiers that Peter helped him design and they’ll survive.

After everything Peter gave to give them that chance, Tony feels like helping them is the very least he can do.

So he drinks, and he watches the newly restored to life world leaders scramble to put their shit together.

Strange searches.

Tony thinks he should probably feel guilt that he isn’t helping but then again, Tony is drunk enough that he barely registers the idea that he should feel guilty.

~*~

“He wouldn’t want you to be like this,” Strange tells him one night, when he arrives in the Tower and finds Tony, messy drunk on the couch.

“You don’t get to talk about him,” Tony slurs, his glare lacking any heat and that’s the real crime here.

“You aren’t the only one who lost him, Stark,” Strange snarls, and his expression--fuck.

Even drunk, Tony recognizes that look. That look--he’s seen it in the mirror, staring helpless and fond at Peter as he clung to Tony’s back, sleepy and pliant.

He knows that look, knows what love looks like.

“You--” Tony stumbles and Strange looks away.

“I want to bring him home, too,” he says, tight and angry and Tony doesn’t have a chance to answer, before he’s stepping into nothing and away.

~*~

“You’e leaving,” Tony says.

Strange is standing nearby, and he thinks it’s strange, that these two have become his near constant companions since the Restoration.

“I can’t leave him here, Stark,” Thor says, his voice soft in a way it never was, before. “Both of them, all of you--your letting Peter destroy you.”

“I won’t stop searching,” Loki snarls, and Thor tucks the raging god to his side, grief in his eyes.

“Go,” Tony says, but it’s not as angry as he expected. It’s just tired.

Thor’s eyes are sad and his grip on his brother tight, as they go.

~*~

He goes back to his lab.

It’s dusty and still, the way that makes his skin crawl because his labs are never quiet, not like this. Even the bots are quiet and it aches in his gut, because this--this isn’t right.

The lab was always alive and noisy, filled with Peter’s quiet mutters and excited yelps, with Tony’s music and the whirring of the bots.

It was the place that felt most like home, the place he always knew he could do anything, and now--now it’s quiet and empty, almost tomblike and it feels like a slap in the face, like he’s given up on the boy he swore he’d never give up on.

“FRIDAY,” he breathes, and the lights come up. DUM-E whirs softly in the corner, trundling across the lab to pick at his pants inquisitively.

“Boss?” FRIDAY ask and Tony straightens his shoulders.

“Let’s create a search algorithm, ok?”

~*~

There are refugees living in the Tower now. He threw open the doors when he first got back, when he realized just how bad things had gotten in New York. Rhodey had been concerned, and Steve waa furious--but there was power and safety and food at the tower.

The lack of trust the world at large seemed to have for the Avengers and Tony didn't matter in the face of anarchy and starvation. They came in droves, glaring and cursing him and taking his food and shelter.

He couldn't blame them. He cursed himself.

Sometimes, he goes down and wanders among them. Sometimes, when he does, he sees Strange, moving through the crowded halls, passing out medicine and caring for the injured, as best he can. He never acknowledges Tony, when he does that--and Tony never acknowledges him.

There is one place, amongst the refugees, that Tony likes to go, where no one glares and spits at him, where he is met with wide smiles and trusting eyes.

The fifth floor is set aside aside for children. And sometimes, he goes and sits with them because they have no one left, and so much of the time, Tony feels the same way.

~*~

Nebula is strange.

Alien and other in a way that can’t be denied and it sets others on edge. The Guardians, Restored now, and still grieving Gamora’s death, don’t trust her.

The Avengers don’t know her, and don’t care enough to get to know her, wrapped up as they are with their own world and it’s mountain of problems.

Tony watches her sometimes, sitting in his lab with DUM-E and Butterfingers, and thinks she’s the loneliest creature in the universe.

Still.

She saved him, in space, and he saved her, and they understand each other.

“Do you miss space?” he asks one day. She looks at him, her gaze curious and detached--that strange balance she does so well.

“I miss my sister,” she says, simply.

And it is, he thinks.

They are all of them defined by what they miss and cannot recover--space is there , she could have it, if she wanted. One day, she will.

Gamora--

Gamora is gone, and never coming back.

On his worst days, Tony thinks Peter is too.

~*~

He didn’t have time, really, to miss Peter. Not while they scrambled to get off Titan, and not on the mad, desperate, almost fatal rush back to earth.

Not in the months after they returned, when everything was pushed away by the need to fix it, when the world spun on, ash and dust, and an endless race to undo everything Thanos did.

But there’s time now.

And that ache, the sharp stabbing pain of his absence--it’s inescapable.

He told Peter, once, that if Peter died, it would be on him.

He didn’t mean for those words to be prophetic. He didn’t know Peter, then--not really. He knew the boy he’d dragged into his fight with the Cap, he knew the eager to please kid with a hero complex that was so like Rogers and so different--Rogers was a hero complex with a moral superiority and righteous fury. Peter--Peter just wanted to help . He was pure in a way none of them were, and brilliant.

So fucking brilliant it made Tony’s heart pound. Peter kept up with him the way only Bruce ever had, the way the little Wakanda princess can.

He misses him most, when he’s in his lab, and the bots are whirring for his attention, and FRIDAY plays his music, and there is no bright smile, no curious eyes, no chirpy hey, Mr. Stark, while he greeted the bots with affectionate pets.

He misses Peter, a constant ache that makes it hard to breath, hard to eat, hard to sleep, hard to exist.

Sometimes he thinks he shouldn’t, if Peter doesn’t.

He should be here, and he isn’t, and it sits like a rock, hard and painful, in his gut, and his throat, and his heart.

~*~

“Boss, the scan is finished,” FRIDAY says one day, while he’s sitting with the orphans. He nods, and finishes the story he’s reading, before he quietly slips away. They fall on Nebula in his absence, something he knows still baffles the girl.

Still. She lets them drag her down, her stern expression melting into something soft and almost warm, and he smiles as he goes to the lab.

The scan is waiting.

It took them almost a month. It wasn’t enough, to search for Peter’s DNA signature. It needed to cover every possibility--needed to search for his spider mutation, and the signature of Titan on his body, the stones and the shadow realm.

It had to try everything because nothing they were trying was working.

He’d asked for Loki and Strange’s help, but Thor refused to let him near Loki, firm in his apologies. “It’s not good for him,” he said, almost sad.

“He’s here,” Tony had snarled, incandescent in his rage and Thor had met it levelly.

“And if your Spider was--would you risk him to find my brother?”

It stopped Tony in his tracks, just as Thor knew it would. He’d given Tony one final look of sorrow and left.

“Don’t blame him,” Strange said, and Tony choked on his laughter. “Loki only found the shadow realm because of stones. The one--it’s very fond of him.”

Tony stared at him, and Strange huffed. “Loki wasn’t killed by Thanos’ Snap. He shouldn’t have been Restored--Gamora wasn’t. The Space Stone saved him. And Thor knows his brother being alive is a miracle. You cannot ask him to risk that.”

“I am asking.”

Strange studied him. “Let me help instead.”

Tony wasn’t turning away help, not from the wizard, not from anyone. They built the scan.

“You know it might not work,” Strange says from behind him as Tony turns it on.

He does know. The scan will only find Peter if Peter is alive and on earth to be found.

“It will,” he says. It has to.

~*~

FRIDAY runs the scan three times a day.

No matter where he is in the tower, he knows when it starts--the lights flicker, the massive engine powering the scan yanking hard on the power of the arc reactor.

His heart thumps, hard and uneven, in answer to those flickering lights, before he forces his attention back to whatever he’s using to occupy himself.

Sometimes it’s meetings. Sometimes, it’s the kids.

Sometimes, it’s just booze and his memories, and his open, sad lab.

Tony tries not to think too much about how much those days would disappoint Peter, or, how, as time passes and the scan finds nothing--those nights turn up more and more.

“You knew it would take time,” Strange murmurs, one night, when FRIDAY comes back with the familiar, disheartening, scan negative, boss.

“It doesn’t make it easier,” Tony says, and Strange nods.

Tony looks at him, this man who had Peter when he didn’t, who came back without him, and asks, one of two questions he’s never let himself ask. “Was he--in the other realm. Was he scared?”

I don’t wanna go. Please, Mr. Stark.

Strange shakes his head. “No. For a long time--time moved differently, there. But for a long time, he was happy. We all were. None of us realized what had happened.”

He was happy. He isn’t, not now. It burns, a brand of pain he can’t assuage, but he asks, “What changed?”

Strange stares at him, his eyes bright and intent. “He remembered you.”

~*~

"We can't house them indefinitely," Steve says.

"What are you suggesting?" Tony asks, mildly. He's sober and shaved, and his eyes are bright and alert, not shadowed and searching.

Steve watches him for a long moment, and then, "We need to move them out of the city. Resettle them in the country, on land they can farm. They'll be closer to self-sustaining, if we do that."

"That works, for some of them--but what about the children."

Steve is quiet for a long time, and then, Nat says, cautiously, "We think each family sent to the farms should take one of the orphans."

Tony stops breathing. His hands clench, and for a moment, he wishes he was wearing the suit he hasn't put on since Titan. "You don't know if these families are good people, you don't know anything about them."

"Tony," Steve starts.

"No. Absolutely fucking not. The kids stay," he snaps, cutting Captain Fucked Up Ideas off cold.

"That's not sustainable," Steve says, gently.

"Fuck sustainable," Tony spits, furious. His heart is pounding and all he can think is *Peter would be one of those children. "You are not giving children to random strangers who could hurt them."

"Then what do you want to do with them?" Bucky asks, and he isn't agreeing with Steve. He's calm, quiet. Actively curious.

The problem is--Tony doesn't know.

He doesn't know what to do anymore.

~*~

It's Loki who figures it out. He comes to Earth with Thor, and his eyes are almost normal, that wildness and manic fear bled away into something that's almost content. He clings to Strange, though, when the wizards steps out of a portal and opens his arms, his thin frame shaking.

"Hush, now, Mischief," Strange murmurs.

"You promised," Loki says, muffled, and Tony's heart jerks, hard, because he wants to know what that means, what Strange promised.

"I did. And I never lied to you. Trust me?"

Loki stares at him and some of the tension drains out of him.

He looks at Tony and his gaze is bright and hopeful. "Thor said something about you having a problem with too many children?"

That's how he ends up on the fifth floor, watching helplessly as Loki sits on the ground, a baby asleep against his shoulder, three children in his lap and another tucked against his side. A little girl with golden brown curls hangs on his back, her grin wide and eager and painful to watch.

"He's very good with kids," Tony says, startled. He'd never considered that Thor's power mad baby brother might have more than just that particular description hidden in his black and green depths.

"He loves them," Thor says, his voice thick. "He will be a fine mother, one day."

Tony very deliberately doesn't answer that particular rejoiner, and is ridiculously grateful when Loki walks up, the baby still sleeping against his shoulder.

"Send them to the same farm. Let them run it. There's enough older children, and you can send some of your people up for a while, until they're settled."

Tony stares at the god of mischief and wonders if it can be that easy.

~*~

He finds Nebula in the cockpit of their spaceship.

It is theirs, cobbled together by desperation and bastardized tech, by nanites from his suit and parts Nebula couldn’t really give up but did.

They survived, because surviving was the only way to save the ones they loved.

He hates this fucking ship, has avoided it in all the long months since they limped off and into the arms of the remaining Avengers.

And now, Nebula is standing here, a small kit bag at her feet, her eyes shining with something Tony isn’t ready to see.

She doesn’t say anything--she doesn’t need to. He knows what it’s like, to run from your feelings, to run from what hurt.

“You can’t go,” he says, and she laughs.

It’s wet and hurt and it makes him ache, to hear.

“There’s nothing for me here, Stark.”

“There’s less for you out there,” he points out, and it’s cruel. He knows it’s cruel--he just doesn’t care.

He needs her to stay.

He already lost Peter, lost Pepper--he can’t lose Nebula too.

“Stay,” he says, his voice a whisper, and she stares at him.

“I’m leaving, one day, Stark. You know that.”

He does.

He knows.

But it doesn’t have to be today.

She sighs, and follows him off the ship and back into the Compound.

~*~

Sometimes, he sits in his lab, and watches the blue and red sensor sweeping the planet.

He watches, and he aches, for what he can’t have.

Steve says Peter is gone, that the search algorithm is draining precious resources. Tony doesn’t argue with him--can’t argue with him. He’s right . They can’t afford the scans.

Tony answers that concern by building three arc reactors to power buildings around the city, and introduces Bruce’s new strain of grain DNA.

Loki and Thor arrive with food, and Quill and his Guardians bring in supplies from nearby galaxies.

It’s all a stop gap, and he knows it--but any stop gap buys him time to keep searching.

Rebuilding the world doesn’t matter, not if they can’t bring Peter home.

“Am I being selfish?” he asks Strange one night, when he’s not nearly as drunk as he wants to be.

It’s been three months since the Restoration and Peter--Peter is still gone.

He’s beginning to wonder if Steve is right.

“He sacrificed everything to save all of us and you’re trying to do the same. It’s not selfish--but I don’t know if it’ll work,” Strange says, that familiar bluntness that Tony loves and hates.

“Why him?” Tony asks, and it’s desperate, and sad, and he hates himself for asking.

Strange sighs, and shakes his head. “Because the Stones chose him.”

~*~

It’s a Thursday, a quiet rainy morning five months after the Restoration. Tony is looking over reports on the Orphan’s farm, and tweaking some plans about security when the lights flicker and surge, and his heart does too.

He forces his breathing to stay steady, and finishes reviewing the plans with a hand that only barely shakes.

“Sir,” FRIDAY cuts through his concentration, and he frowns. There won’t be enough room for growth, if they don’t remove that field on the west end and build more dormitories. And growth is important, they’re--

“ Boss,” FRIDAY almost shouts, and it jerks Tony’s attention up.

The lights are dim, dimmer than they should be and FRIDAY’s voice is sharp and excited in a way he didn’t program her to be. “Scan positive.”

~*~

He calls Strange who summons Loki, and they gather around the display, a creature of magic, a man of science, and a being who managed to be both.

The little red icon blinks, steady and slow, and Tony feels like his heartbeat is slowing to match it, like it knows Peter is on the other end of that blinking icon.

“Strange,” Loki whispers, his eyes locked on the icon, his hands trembling. “Tell him.”

~*~

“The Stones fought Thanos,” Strange says. His eyes are wary and distant, and Tony wants to walk away from this conversation, wants to go find Peter , but Loki spelled the Tower, so he couldn’t leave and that was that. “They didn’t want him as a master. They never wanted a master. ”

“You talk about them like they’re sentient.”

Strange inclines his head. “They were.”

The stones, Strange explains in fits and starts, rebelled against Thanos, fought his control, reaching for anyone else.

They found Peter. A boy that was pure enough to pull the Soul stone, who Loki adore and Strange trusted, and Tony Stark loved--something the Stones noticed and knew. They remembered their previous masters, remembered the creatures they had been held by--and they saw a boy, a boy who sang to the Soul stone, and so many one-time masters loved, and they turned to him.

The other two followed where the four led, and when Peter reached for them--they fell into him.

“Not a weapon, Tony. Not a gauntlet, like Thanos used.”

Tony stares at Strange, at Loki. Even Loki could only wield the Stone when it was housed in the Tesseract.

“What did he use? To house them,” he demands, almost begs, and Strange looks at him, unfathomably sad.

“ Peter housed them.”

~*~

Tony steps out of the portal, and he isn’t sure what he’s expecting.

He doesn’t know what it means, what Strange said. Loki said the stones were part of Peter, the way the Mind Stone had been part of Vision.

He doesn’t want to think about how that could change the boy he lost, the boy he loved.

Strange steps after him, and the portal closes, leaving them in the dim darkness of a deserted school.

“FRIDAY,” Tony calls.

“Down the hall--third room on the right, boss,” she says, immediately.

Tony sees him first.

For a moment--looking at the curve of his slumped shoulders, the shaggy familiar hair--for a moment, he thinks it’s ok.

“Pete?” he says, and Loki makes a noise, low and indistinct.

And he flares , a dazzling array of colors skating under his skin, the room almost blindingly bright.

Strange curses, and the boy throws himself through the window, and Tony--

Tony throws himself right after him.

He realizes, a moment too late, that he’s not wearing a suit.

He’s three stories up and not wearing a suit and he hears an exasperated huff, before he’s jerked up and into strong arms.

For a moment, he’s close and Peter is frowning at him, worry in his ancient, shifting eyes.

For a moment, the world is right.

“Hi, Pete,” he breathes.

~*~

They take him home.

He fights it--but it’s half hearted, digging his feet in, pulling against their touch, but never with all of his strength, and Loki says something, too low for Tony to hear, and it makes all the fight drain out of him, makes Peter slump next to the god and follow along, docile at his side. He stays close to Loki, and sometimes, his gaze will flick to Strange, like he’s reassuring himself. Sometimes his fingers twitch and Tony thinks he’s a hairs breath from flinging himself away.

He is careful to avoid Tony’s gaze, to keep two or three bodies between them, and Tony tries not to let that sting.

~*~

In the Tower, Strange and Loki whisk Peter away, murmuring low and quiet to him and Tony watches his shoulders slump in what looks like relief as he goes, strange and somehow not, between them.

“They’ll take care of him,” Thor says, and his brow is furrowed, worry glinting in his eyes. “Loki--he has not been the same, since he came back. Part of him was still with your Spider.”

“I don’t think any of are the same.”

Thor nods, accepting that. “It’s different, though. Loki is different. In the same way that Strange is--in the same way you are. Losing young Peter broke something in all of you.”

Tony doesn’t argue that.

He can’t.

It’s the truth.

~*~

“He’s different.”

Strange is never going to sugar coat anything for him, Tony thinks and nods once. “Peter is--he won’t speak. And he is very afraid.”

“Won’t speak?” Tony echoes, not quite sure how to reconcile his Peter, with the snark and sass and babble with silence.

“He can speak, Tony,” Strange says. “When he’s ready--he will.”

Tony doesn’t ask--what if he’s never ready.

He doesn’t think he wants to hear Strange’s too blunt answer.

~*~

Peter is like a ghost, haunting the Tower. There are signs of him--cups of abandoned coffee, bowls of cereal, bits of spiderwebs in the corners of the ceilings, a trace of magic in the air like ozone--but never anything Tony can see , nothing he can touch and hold and reassure himself is real.

He knows Peter is there, knows it in the smile and lightness in Loki and the way the lines around Strange’s eyes and mouth ease with every passing day.

But he never sees the boy, and he thinks maybe that is worse.

~*~

He has nightmares. Most nights--but some nights, he doesn’t ever truly wake from them.

Some nights, he hovers between nightmares of Titan and ash and a high frantic begging, and here, the Tower, the quiet of his room.

Some nights, he almost feels a hand, brushing through his hair, and lips, impossibly soft, against his skin, and he thinks--this isn’t real.

But it isn’t a nightmare, either.

He hears, shh. Shh. shh. And then sleep claims him again.

~*~

“He’s staying, Tony. I know you want more--”

“I want him ,” Tony snaps. “I want him back.”

“And he is. As much as he can be--Peter is back. He’s just--different.”

“I don’t mind different,” Tony says, because he doesn’t. He’s different. Losing Peter, losing , it changed him.

It changed the whole world.

“I just--I want him to come home.”

Loki shifts, draws closer to Tony and his eyes are soft, soft. “He’s here. He’s staying. Not with Strange in the Sanctum or me in New Asgard--he is here, in your tower. Because you are.”

Tony looks at him, and Loki smiles, gentle, small, and reassuring. He didn’t know Loki could smile like that. “He isn’t running from you, Tony. Trust him to come in his own time.”

~*~

Sometimes, the silence in his lab thickens, and he won’t look up, but he’ll feel Peter, sitting in a corner. He doesn’t know what to do in those moments. He doesn’t want to scare him away, is almost too terrified to look at him, and he wants with a visceral fierceness, a sharpness so sudden it makes his breath catch and his eyes sting.

Peter doesn’t ever say anything. He doesn’t think Peter has said anything since they found him in that dirty hovel--certainly not to Tony.

But he sits there, in his quiet corner, and he watches and Tony is grateful for it, so grateful he doesn’t even mind that Peter is silent.

And when he begins to speak. When he talks about Nebula and the orphans, about the months in space and the endless months trying to undo the Snap. When he whispers about his nightmares and regrets and shouts at the bots and mumbles equations and argues with Steve--Peter listens.

He stays in his corner, in his quiet, but when Tony dares to look at him--Peter stares back, a tiny smile on his lips, and he listens.

~*~

Peter likes to go down to where the orphans are.

When he can be coaxed out of the penthouse and the rooms he hides away in, when he isn’t in the labs watching Tony--it’s there that he can be found. Curled in a corner of a couch, three children piled on him, his hands tucked into oversize sweatshirts Tony recognizes from his own closet. He sits there, and they play with his hair and whisper to him and he smiles, a loose familiar smile that makes Tony hope.

Sometimes, when he goes down, Tony finds Loki there, weaving stories and illusions and multi-colored lights dazzle the children while Peter watches, indulgent and happiness shining in his ancient eyes.

Sometimes, he goes and finds them all asleep, piled on him like so many puppies and the air ripples with recognition when Tony gets too close and he thinks--these are Peter’s. His lost little children, and he will protect them.

With all of his immense power, Tony knows he will protect them.

And he thinks--while Peter blinks up at him sleepily from under three toddlers, a gentle smile on his lips--he thinks, maybe he is Peter’s too. Claimed and kept and protected.

~*~

The world keeps turning. The world keeps turning and Peter keeps to himself, keeps silent. He visits the orphans and watches Tony and the power of the Stones plays under his skin, untapped and unchecked and the world keeps falling apart.

Tony knows what will happen. Even before it does, because he knows Steve.

“We have to think about what we’re doing,” Steve says. “We have to think about the long game.”

Tony barely holds in his snarl at that word, the sharp spike of fury he feels at being a pawn in another game.

“He can help, Tony.”

“We aren’t using Peter,” Tony says, his voice hard and brooking no argument.

Steve’s lips are tight and Barnes touches his wrist, a light, fleeting touch that draws him away and silences the fighting for the moment.

He isn’t stupid, though. He knows it’s not the end of things.

~*~

Strange is in his kitchen, making tea. It no longer even surprises him to see the wizard there. At least this time he’s in jeans and a long sleeve shirt and not that damn robe and cloak.

Peter sits nearby, hands cradling his own steaming mug, eyes unnaturally bright as he watches the Sorcerer.

“We need to talk,” Strange says and Tony frowns, glancing at Peter, who has gone still and tense.

“Rogers--”

His gut drops and rage flares in it’s place and he snarls. “ No.”

“This is bigger than you or me, or even Peter,” Strange says, and he’s tired. He sounds so tired.

They saved the world, they all did, and they gave up so fucking much to do it--when did they get to stop. When was it enough. He closes his eyes. “The world needs this,” Strange says.

“You aren’t using Peter,” Tony says, dully. Shocked he even has to say it. “Not like that. Not ever. He isn’t your fucking tool.”

“Have you even asked him, if he wants to do this?” Strange asks, and Peter sitting on the counter with his tea suddenly makes sense.

He hates Strange, a little, in that moment.

Hates him for being a manipulative bastard, and hates him for putting them both in this position.

He hates him and he knows what the answer will be.

~*~

Tony remembers the first time he heard about the Infinity Stones. He was on a helicarrier with a man who should be dead, a femme fatale, a Norse god from outer space, and a timid scientist with rage problems.

He misses the days when his life was that normal.

“It’s simply a matter of remaking reality. Not all of it--just a piece.”

Peter looks at Strange, and his eyes are ancient and trusting and young, and he glances at Tony, almost like he’s looking for reassurance. Steve is there, waiting, arms crossed, hopeful. Loki leans against the counter with Thor pressed a step too close. There’s an air of hopefulness, thick waiting and anxiety, and Tony knows, he knows that even if this is the right thing for the rest of the world, it’s the wrong thing for Peter.

He puts down his coffee and steps over, steps into Peter’s space for the first time since they brought him home, and Peter’s hands--small and delicate and strong--come up to wrap in his shirt, holding him back, holding him close.

“You don’t have to do this,” he murmurs and Peter’s eyes widen. “We’ll find another way. I’m working on smart seeds, baby, you don’t have to do this.”

The room is quiet, silent, tense.

Peter watches him, big beautiful eyes bright and intent, and then--he smiles.

He looks past Tony, and meets Strange’s gaze, and nods.

His grip on Tony never loosens.

~*~

He has nightmares, sometimes.

More nights than he likes to think about, he wakes screaming, and all he can do is grasp at the empty bedsheets and feel the dust on his fingers, his lips, burning in his eyes.

Peter finds him some nights, finds him sitting in the dark living room with Nebula, and his eyes are gentle as he takes the Scotch and his fingers are solid as they wrap around Tony’s and his skin is warm when he curls close.

It’s not enough. He doesn’t think he’ll ever forget this boy, this precious boy, turning into nothing in his arms.

He doesn’t think he’ll ever dream, and not hear his voice, panicked and terrified and begging him to fix it.

But he holds onto Peter and Nebula watches them both, and the night passes.

The sun always rises.

~*~

Things don’t get better overnight.

But sometimes, Peter will go with Strange and Loki, will walk barefoot in the dusty dead fields, and FRIDAY will murmur about power spikes, and Tony will feel it, the power of the stones rippling and rewriting everything that Thanos destroyed.

“Why not do it all at once?” Steve asks once, watching Peter coming back, feet heavy and tripping as he stumbles between Lokii and Strange, and Nebula scoffs.

“That only causes new problems, Captain. Did Thanos teach you nothing?”

Steve looks at her, eyes wide and startled and she looks almost like she pities him. “You cannot fix something by destroying a part of it. Thanos destroyed half the universe to save it. And that almost destroyed what he left behind.”

“Peter--”

“Peter coaxes. He heals. The stones aren’t going to be used for destruction, not ever again,” Tony murmurs. “Peter would never allow it.”

Peter glances up at him, and he smiles.

“That’s why they chose him,” he murmurs and for the first time since before the Snap--he feels like he can breath.

~*~

The world turns.

The orphans grow and Peter sits by, quiet and beautiful and watchful, and Tony thinks--maybe they can heal. He talks in the lab and Peter grins at him, shadows of the boy from before, and he realizes abruptly--he doesn’t miss that boy.

He loves Peter.

Changed and scarred and so powerful it makes him shake--he loves Peter.

~*~

Peter creeps into his room the day of the third anniversary of the Snap, the first he’d spent in the Tower, and stares at Tony.

“I’m not going,” he says, softly, and Peter nods. He crawls into bed next to Tony and his hands shake and he is so slow it’s agonizing to watch.

It’s been nine months.

And Peter is still silent, still scared.

“I love you, kid,” Tony breathes and Peter freezes for a moment, before he melts into Tony’s side.

It’s comforting, and he clings to the quiet boy as the day spins and the sky darkens and another year passes.

~*~

Nebula leaves.

“You don’t need me anymore, Tony,” she says, and she smiles. “I don’t think you ever needed me. ”

She flicks a glance at Peter who blushes and grins, and leans into Tony. He’s been doing that more--presing close even in the daylight, when monsters and nightmares don’t haunt them both.

Tony likes it--more than he should, he thinks.

“Where will you go?” he asks, and Nebula’s expression curls in, something lonely and sad, and she looks away, blinking hard.

Peter detangles himself from Tony and goes to her, hugs her despite her stiffness and Tony tries to bite back how much it hurts when he whispers, soft and low in her ear, too low for Tony to hear.

She smiles at him, when he pulls away and says, “Take care of him, Stone Bearer.”

Peter smiles, cocky sure and happy and winks, and she nods at Tony.

He and Nebula don’t need any more words than they’ve already shared.

She leaves, and he wonders, holding his boy close, if he’ll ever see her again.

He wonders where Peter sent her.

“I hope she’s happy,” he whispers, and Peter squeezes his hand.

~*~

Peter laughs, sometimes. Most when they go to the Orphan’s Farm, and the kids pile on him, heedless and uncaring about the color skating under his skin and shifting in his eyes.

Tony misses his voice. Misses the way he stumbled over his words when he was excited or nervous or flustered. Misses the way he talks too fast and high, desperate to get out his thoughts, his eyes sparkling as he spoke.

But he laughs, and he curls into Tony’s arms when they sleep and he pets the bots, soft and affectionate, when he comes into the lab and Tony sees Strange watching, and he thinks--

They’ll be ok.

~*~

The first time he kisses Peter, it’s after Loki and Thor announce the new prince of Asgard’s impending arrival.

Peter laughs, delighted and Strange smiles, small and pleased and draws Loki into a hug. “I am so happy for you, Mischief,” he murmurs and Peter hums his agreement. They whisper like that, the three of them together, heads bent towards each other, a little world that he can’t ever be a part of and he sees it, suddenly.

“Thank you,” he blurts and Strange blinks up at him. Loki is smirking and waiting and Peter--Peter watches, his head tilted and curious.

“I never--I never said that. Never said thank you. But you--both of you--protected him, when I couldn’t. I--even if this is as much of you as we get back, Pete--I am so grateful.” He stumbles over his words and shrugs. “Thank you. Thank you for loving him.”

Peter makes a low hurt noise and comes across the room to burrow in his arms and Tony lowers his head, kisses his soft soft hair. “I am so glad you’re home, baby. I missed you so much,” he says, something he’s never said before, something that’s always been assumed, known, but never spoken.

Peter whimpers and tilts his head up, and it’s easy.

So very easy.

To kiss him. Soft and gentle, like a warm wind blowing across the Tower balcony. Peter tastes like strawberries and mead and electricity. Tony moans and kisses him hard and deep, his hands impossibly gentle as they hold Peter close.

He smiles a little, and Peter blinks up at him. Dazed and happy.

His voice is low and hoarse and broken, when he speaks. It’s the most beautiful sound Tony’s ever heard.

“Tony,” Peter whispers.

~*~

The world ended.

And they put it back together. Not quite right. There were broken pieces, missing pieces, sharp edges that still drew blood. But Peter is tucked in his bed, sleepy and warm and the stones shimmer under his skin, and Tony thinks--this isn’t losing.

It’s winning. They won. They win every day, a few degrees at a time.

#starker #starker fic #fix-it fic #tony stark x peter parker #avengers: infinity war #arei writes fic #tonystarkbingo2019

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