#I must say based on what I saw in voting I think a lot of people forgot the molten part

[resplendent-dwellings]

[traineecryptid]

NPSS Weibo Q&A (20240831) Part 1

This is a Q&A session held on Weibo. People will tag their questions with the hashtag #南派三叔藏海花在线答疑# (#NPSS Zang Hai Hua Online Q&A#) and NPSS will look through the tag to pick some to answer. The event started at 1500 hours on 2024 August 31st. For comedic purposes, this translation will include the timestamps for the answers. And for efficiency purposes, I have left out all usernames. The usernames of the question-askers can be found via the screenshots in this folder if anyone is inclined to do that.

1422 Come ask questions at #NPSS Zang Hai Hua Online Q&A#. I will stay online and pick questions to answer without limits from 3pm onward. 1500 Q: Sanshu, what was the thing that Zhang Qiling wanted Pangzi to tell Wu Xie that Pangzi mentioned when he was fixing Wu Xie’s dislocated shoulder? My friends and I would love to know. 

A: Eat well, sleep well, wear socks even in the summer. 1500 Q: Lei, do you like this pic I made? [It’s an edit of NPSS’s face on a pink dressed magical girl body]

A: I feel like this pic is affecting the fengshui in my house.

1502 Q: Shu, it is confirmed that Ten Years is included in the ZHH drama. Then, will the drama show the changes between ZHH Wu Xie and Ten Years Wu Xie? In yesterday’s livestream you said that there are four turning points in the drama. Is it that Wu Xie will become Xie Di after being tricked four times? A: Every character and their fate all have big turning points. Whether he’s a good person or an evil person, whether his answers are real or fake, you must watch till the end [only then you’ll know].

1502 Q: Sanshu, what was Wu Xie thinking in the split second when he saw Menyouping’s portrait in Tibet? A: “What the fuck!” (T/N: swears are not very translatable in meaning. I tried.) 1503

Q: Pumpkin Sect (T/N: this might be an intentional typo punning of nanpai which means southern sect), what would the scene be like if Xiaoge’s mom met Wu Xie? Would Bai Ma be happy that her child had gained some humanity because of Wu Xie? A: Bai Ma would probably teach Wu Xie to sing. Something like The Night of Ulaanbaatar.

1505 Q: Shu, why have you been answering so many questions lately? Has there been some big thing happening?

A: They said that I’m a liuliang celebrity so I should shoulder the publicity mission. (T/N: Liuliang celebrity refers to celebrities who are popular (or controversial) and are able to generate a lot of social media traffic. For example: when a celeb would get on the trending searches whenever they post selfies/ attend events/ do just about anything.)

1513 Q: What would Mo Yungao from Southern Archives do if he had really found Xiaoge? A: He would eat Zhang Qiling.

1523 Q: Is the audience viewing experience taken into deep consideration when making drama and movie adaptations? For example, allowing those who haven't read the novels to understand the plot. I saw some people saying that they couldn’t follow the plot [from the drama].

A: For Reboot, in order to help the audience get into it, we introduced the characters and their occupation in the first episode. But for ZHH,  according to the number of votes, we all chose to do a cold open based on the novel. 

1524 Q: Sanshu, Sanshu, I want to know, based on Zhang Qiling’s arm strength, how many Wu Xies can he carry?

A: If he uses the strength from his waist to assist, he can throw Wu Xie up to the third floor.

1526 Q: What is the ending for Boss Jiao in the Reboot novel?

A: Became Jiao. (T/N: The character for Jiao means burnt).

1527 Q: Will Xu Zhenxuan play Wu Xie in the Heavenly Palace re-shoot?

A: Yes.

1528

Q: Shu, did Zhang Haike recommend Xiaoge’s drink to Wu Xie because he wants to show off that he understands Xiaoge? A: Hahahahaha

1532 Q: ZHH drama and novel will have two separate endings. Now that the drama has an ending, have you decided on the ending of the novel? When will you experience Tianshou? A: I always understood the dramas as the dreams of the characters from the books. That means that the changes in details in the dramas, to me, I would always explain it as the intentional and unintentional amendment to the details as they tell this story to someone else. Or that these are part of their dream and after-the-fact fears. I will explain it again after [you] see the end.

1533

Q: I would like to know the mental state of the company. It seems like it’s taking big steps towards a beautiful direction.

A: It’s rare to be able to legally go crazy. Everyone’s very happy.

Here's the first 15. There are more answers and I will chip at them at a pace that will hopefully be able to keep up with NPSS. The folder also contains a google doc that has all the complied Q&As if anyone prefers to read on that.

[oakwolves]

And Then I Go and Spoil It All By Saying Something Stupid Like I Love You, Part 2

Part 1 of this AU

Rosalyn was surprised to find her father in the kitchen the following morning after her ordeal with Ace. He turned around, a sizzling pan in his hand. He placed a pancake on a decently sized stack on the table. As Rosalyn approached, she saw more of her favorite breakfast foods on the table.

“What’s the occasion?” She asked. “And I thought you’d be out of the house by now.”

Dr.Brinkwater chuckled and said, “Our meeting got postponed today, so I’m stuck here for a few hours. Besides, I figured I’d cheer up my little girl after she’s had a rough couple of days.”

Rosalyn grimaced at the reminder. “I guess you heard about me resigning,” she muttered, sitting at the table.

“Gotta say, it was a bit shocking to have to find out about it from a colleague showing me the newspaper during our meeting yesterday,” he said, cooking up some pancakes for himself. 

“I was gonna tell you, it’s… it’s just been a lot going on within these past 48 hours and I–”

“I understand, Rosebud,” he said. “Juggling everything that goes on at Lakeside AND dealing with the district council must have been too much for you.”

“What?” Rosalyn looked up from her pancakes with indignation. “That’s not why I resigned!”

“Oh?” Dr. Brinkwater started to work on his own pile of pancakes as he listened. “Well, I want to hear the full story from you. What happened?”

Rosalyn struggled to figure out how she could even begin to explain things to her father. After a long pause, she said, “My anger got the better of me. I was frustrated and stressed with the fact that my own classmates are just… so damn ungrateful!”

“Language, Rosalyn,” Dr.Brinkwater warned.

“I said some stuff that was never supposed to get broadcasted to my entire school, and they wanted to get me impeached, and that would’ve meant my school wouldn’t get a vote while they go through the proceedings. So I had to resign.”

“I’ve heard,” her father said, taking a bite out of his pancakes. “So, did you mean what you said?”

The question caught Rosalyn off guard a little. She took a deep breath and steeled herself. “Yeah. I did. Can you imagine working your butt off to build a school from the ground up and help everyone with even the dumbest requests and they still have the nerve to say you’re not doing enough?”

Dr.Brinkwater did not respond for a while, simply chewing and nodding along as Rosalyn began to rant on about her classmates for a few minutes. 

“Between you and me, Rosebud?” he finally said. “You’re absolutely right. Some of these kids are outright jackasses.”

She nearly choked on her food hearing that. “Are you supposed to say stuff like that?”

Dr.Brinkwater chuckled and replied, “Not in front of the kids’ parents, no. But this can stay between us, right?”

Rosalyn recovered and gave her father a small smile. “Yeah, I guess so. But what am I gonna do now?”

“From my understanding,” Dr.Brinkwater explained. “Now there’s a vacancy for the school district rep at Lakeside. I’m hoping they’ll make the right decision and pick someone they think will best represent them.”

“Yeah, because apparently I wasn’t good enough for them,” she muttered.

“Either way,” he continued. “You still have a lot of responsibilities at home base. You’ve been doing great so far. Don’t let a setback like this keep you from being your best you.”

“Thanks dad,” she said as she finished her breakfast.

As she began to leave the table, she heard her father say, “I was wondering, are you and that Ace guy still in touch? Sure, you might not be on the council anymore, but I figured you and him must have discussed other ways of being able to help your community.”

Rosalyn stiffened. 

“We’re working on something,” she said after a pause. “Ace always has a plan.”

“Well, that’s good to hear, sweetheart. Lakeside’s always been in capable hands.”

She said nothing more as she grabbed her bag for school and headed outside. She was surprised to find Ace’s car in front of her. The windows rolled down, revealing Ace at the wheel as he looked straight ahead.

“I have my own motorcycle, you know,” she said.

“Figured I’d give you a ride today,” he replied. “After all, we’re a couple as far as anyone else knows.”

As she reluctantly got into the shotgun seat of the car, she said, “There’s no one else around, who are you doing this for?”

“You think so little of me, Rosalyn,” he said, feigning hurt. “You’re right. There’s no one watching. No one to impress. This is for us.”

Rosalyn looked down at him, her expression softening a little. She sighed and asked, “Alright. But only because I don’t want to be late for class.”

The drive to Lakeside was mostly silent. As they drove, Rosalyn looked through the notifications on her phone. She’d gotten several individual texts from Payton, Julian, and Annie, as well as numerous group texts. After she got home last night, she’d been so drained from the night’s events that she’d collapsed into her bed moments after changing into her pajamas.

Most of the messages were about her and Ace at the party last night. She sighed and placed her phone in her pocket. She’d deal with them when she showed up to school.

“We made quite a splash last night, hmm?” she heard Ace comment. She looked up to find him still staring at the road ahead. “By the end of the week the whole district will know about us.”

“Yeah,” she said with an eye roll. “We’re all anyone will be talking about for weeks.”

“They’ll probably even forget about your little morning slip-up,” he said.

The mention of the morning announcement incident made Rosalyn’s shoulders stiffen, but she forced herself to remain calm.

“Oh, fuck off.” she grumbled.

"Relax, Rosie," he said, noticing her reaction. "It's in the past. Everyone will move on to the next big drama soon enough. But in the meantime, we can play up our little love story. Make it the talk of the town."

Rosalyn said nothing more as they pulled up in the parking lot of Lakeside, where clusters of students were hanging around and chatting.  Ace pulled into a spot and turned off the car. Rosalyn could feel a few eyes on her already, and she mentally braced herself for the inevitable barrage of whispers and stares. Ace was the first to get out, walking around the car to open Rosalyn’s door for her.

“My knight in shining armor,” she said with as much sarcasm as she could muster.

"Ready for our performance?" Ace whispered into her ear as he offered a hand to help her out.

Rosalyn steeled herself. She took his hand and stepped out of the car. As they walked across the parking lot, Rosalyn felt as if all eyes were on them.

Ace, on the other hand, seemed unfazed by the attention, enjoying the show. He had his hand on the small of her back, guiding her to the school entrance. Rosalyn rested her head on Ace’s shoulder as they entered the building. Ace responded by wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her closer to him.

The first person they run into is Wes. He grinned. "I was wondering when you two would've gotten together."

“I figured there would be… complications with her being on the council and me being her advisor, but since Rosalyn’s resigned, we don’t have to worry about that anymore. Isn’t that right, Rosie?”

Rosalyn gave a warm smile as she nuzzled closer to Ace. “That’s right. No more council business to get in the way of our relationship. In a weird way, that recording getting leaked was the best thing that happened to me.”

“You’ve always had a way of finding a good thing out of a bad situation,” Wes commented. “Well, I’ll leave you lovebirds alone, wouldn’t want to make you guys late for class.”

As Wes walked away, Ace looked at Rosalyn with a raised eyebrow.

“What?” She asked. Ace chuckled.

 “Just admiring your acting skills,” he said, still wearing a smirk. He stepped closer, his voice dropping to a low whisper. “You’re a natural, Rosalyn. You almost had me fooled, for a second there. Just a testament of how far you’ve come in this game.”

"ROSALYN!!!" The girl in question looked up to find her best friends Mia and Payton practically stampeding up to them.

"Rosalyn, we heard about what happened last night," Payton said.

"Blink twice if you want us to get you outta here," Mia said, eyeing Ace with a scowl. Their classmates surrounding them continued to watch the spectacle unfolding before them. Ace simply flashed a charming smile and held his head up.

“Mia, I’m fine,” Rosalyn spoke up. “Things have been a bit crazy lately but Ace and I talked things out, and we’re better than ever.”

She leaned in on the tips of her toes and gave Ace a kiss on the cheek for emphasis. He planted a kiss on her forehead in response, keeping his lips there for just a second too long before pulling away.

“Looks like we’ve sufficiently scandalized everyone,” he said, a hint of a smirk playing on his lips.

He looked back at Payton and Mia.

“Rosalyn, is this really what you want?” Payton asked. 

“Trust me, if I’m in any trouble here, you’ll be the first to know,” Rosalyn assured them. Before either of the girls could retort, the bell rang. 

“I better get Rosalyn to her class before she’s late,” Ace said. 

Rosalyn gave a small wave to her friends, and then Ace began steering her through the crowded corridor.

As they walked, Rosalyn couldn't shake the feeling of Ace's arm around her waist, his hand firm. They walked side by side, the hallway bustling with activity as other students made their way to class. Ace's touch at her waist was both comforting and unsettling. She couldn't forget that it was all a part of the charade, and yet, a small part of her couldn't help but feel... a little flustered.

She cast a sidelong glance at Ace, wondering if he felt it too.

“Aren’t YOU gonna be late to Kepler?” Rosalyn asked. “I get that you wanna keep this devoted boyfriend charade up but I never figured it’d come at the cost of your academics.”

He turned his head to cast her a sly smirk. "You're not getting rid of me that easily, Rosalyn."

“Looks like I am now,” she commented as they arrived at the door of her AP Biology class. She gave him a wide smile as she pulled away from him. “Bye!”

The morning classes went on as usual, just with more whispering and pointing directed at her. She caught up with Julian to get lunch together. When they went to sit down at a table, the other students seated there got up to sit at another table. Rosalyn scoffed.

“They’re still mad, apparently,” she said.

“It'll be okay, Rosalyn. They just feel like you look down on everyone. They need time,” Julian assured her.

“Time is the one thing I don’t have right now,” Rosalyn sighed.

“Because of Ace?” Julian asked, his brows furrowing. “Speaking of which, what the heck happened at the party last night?”

Rosalyn picked at the lasagna on her plate. “It’s…Ace and I are dating.”

Julian choked on his broccoli. “You’re what?!”

Rosalyn shushed him. “Not here!”

“But why would you--?”

“It’s complicated, Julian, okay? I’ll tell you about it later.”

“Didn’t he swear revenge against this school and is trying to get it shut down?”

“Julian, shush!” she hissed. “I said we’ll talk about it later. And don’t go around talking about it to the others. Not until I’m ready.”

Julian stared down at her with concern. Behind him, Rosalyn saw the cafeteria doors swing open, and Max storms in with the entire football team.

“Julian! Where's Julian?! I want answers!” the rival football star roared. His eyes zeroed in at Rosalyn’s table and he made a beeline for them.

“What do you want, Max? Threatening us on our turf is getting a little old at this point,” Rosalyn said with a glare.

“Don't play dumb, Rosalyn. No one messes with Hearst and gets away with it! Especially not Julian.”

Julian stood up, getting in Max’s face.

 “What are you talking about? I didn't do anything!”

Max didn’t back down, jabbing a finger in Julian’s chest.

 “Admit it. You stole our state championship trophy!” he accused. “Right now, my dad is meeting with your principal. Your faculty is searching the whole campus for the trophy, and when they find it… You're toast, Julian.”

He emphasized his last sentence by slicing his thumb across his throat with a wicked grin. Rosalyn got in front of Julian, facing off against Max and the entire Hearst football team.

“You think Julian stole your trophy? Why?” she demanded.

“Julian said it himself! He said, and I quote, our trophy case will be empty!”

“Yeah, but-- I didn't mean-- we didn't do it!” Julian spluttered.

“Really? Then why did it say 'Hearst Sucks' on our lockers in red and gold... your school colors?”

“Hell if I know,” she scoffed. “But hey, whoever did this might have done you guys a favor making your school look less drab.”

There was a smattering of laughter in the cafeteria, but a sharp glare from Max silenced them.

“Get out of here, Max. You're not welcome.” Julian crossed his arms.

“Nah, me and my guys are gonna stick around. We want to be here when the trophy's found,” Max said, leading his football buddies out of the cafeteria. Rosalyn’s eyes narrowed as she watched the boys file out.

“This is not good,” she murmured.

“You gotta admit, it's pretty funny... they lost their biggest trophy! Props to whoever stole it,” the school’s basketball captain said with a chuckle.

“Be serious, we’re being searched!” Rosalyn chided.

“Ah, don't worry. I didn't steal their trophy. No big deal,” Julian said, crossing his arms over his head and stretching.

“It's not that simple. The trophy's one thing, but the graffiti points to us too. We’re being framed!”

“By who?” the captain asked. Rosalyn’s mind went back to the party, and how Ace got in between Julian and Max’s argument. How he watched Julian get dragged away into the crowd with an imperceptible look in his eyes.

“I have an idea…” she said with a scowl. Rosalyn rose to her feet. Julian glanced at her.

“Wait, where are you going?” he asked.

“Come on,” she commanded without answering his question. Once they were alone in the hallways, Julian rounded on her.

“Okay, you can’t just say you have an idea and then drag me around without giving more details. What’s going on?” Julian protested. "What the hell is this whole thing you've got going on with Ace?"

Rosalyn sighed and turned to face Julian. "I'll explain as we walk. Right now, we need to find that damn trophy and deal with Ace later."

“Whoa, slow down,” Julian said. “You think Ace is behind this?”

“This has to be. He stole the trophy from Hearst, and I'm betting he planted it somewhere on campus. And once the faculty finds it, we'll be blamed,” she said.

“But I thought you two were dating?”

“I told you, it’s complicated,” she huffed.

“I don't get it. What does Ace think framing us will do besides make us look bad?”

“That's exactly what he wants.  Ace can’t use the Council alone to shut down our school. But what he can do is have the Council ask the school board to vote on it.”

“...and they'll do it if our school is ruining the district's reputation, whether we're being framed or not,” Julian added.

“He was at the party last night. He saw you and Max go at it. He knows every kid in the district would believe it was us after that.”

“This is crazy,” Julian grumbled. “Why the hell are you even with him?”

Rosalyn let out a frustrated sigh. "I know it's complicated, and I have my reasons," she said evasively. "Just trust me, okay? But right now, we need to focus on finding that trophy."

They spotted a group of teachers checking Julian’s locker before moving on.

“There's no way we can search the whole campus faster than our teachers,” Julian said.

"Think. Where would Ace put the trophy if he wanted to blame you…”

“Dude, we just saw them search it-”

“Not that one. My other one! In the locker room, where I keep my football gear!”

“Shit, we’ve gotta get to your locker room.”

Julian took Rosalyn by the hand and led her across the basketball court towards the boys locker room. A few teachers were found looking around for the trophy as a group of boys played a game of basketball.

“Ace hid that trophy in my locker. I just know it,” Julian grumbled as they walked through the court.

“You're the perfect fall guy, after that public fight. Everyone knows there's no love lost between you and Max,” she agreed.

“I just hope the faculty hasn't looked there yet... come on.” Julian pulled Rosalyn into a storage closet. Rosalyn listened carefully until the clacking cacophony of the teacher’s heels was no longer too close.

"If they see us looking for the trophy, we'll get stopped. How are we supposed to sneak across the basketball court?" Julian whispered

Rosalyn’s eyes darted around the dim storage closet, taking in the sports equipment and supplies. An idea came to her.

“Follow my lead,” she commanded. They continued to make their way across the court. When the P.E coach looked her way, Rosalyn swiped the basketball and took a shot at the hoop. The ball went in with a clean swish! The coach looked away, prompting Julian and Rosalyn to dash the rest of the way across the court.

When they burst into the locker room, Julian rushed to his locker and jammed in the locker combination. It opened, revealing a big, pristine trophy in all its glory.

"Found it," Rosalyn confirmed, her voice a low whisper. "You were right, Julian."

“This is unbelievable,” Julian said, shaking his head. "What do we do now?"

Rosalyn carefully lifted the shiny trophy out of the locker, glancing around the room.

"Now we have to make it off campus without getting caught," Rosalyn said.

“I’ll tell everyone to meet us at Pizza Shack,” he said, whipping out his phone as Rosalyn snatched the trophy. The two of them snuck outside into the parking lot, where there were teachers patrolling the area. Rosalyn was about to motion for Julian to follow her to her motorcycle before realizing something. 

“What’s wrong?” Julian asked, noticing Rosalyn’s hesitation.

“Ace drove me to school today…” Rosalyn groaned. “Which means I don’t have my motorcycle.”

“Crap,” Julian grumbled. “What are we supposed to do now? Run all the way there?”

“I guess. Just wait for the coast to be clear.”

“Great…” Julian groaned. Rosalyn tucked the trophy under her arm and proceeded to book it all the way to the pizzeria.

At the Pizza Shack, Rosalyn paced about with her brows furrowed as her friends discussed what to do with the trophy.

“So, we’ve got Ace to thank for this mess,” Nishan grumbled.

“More or less,” Rosalyn muttered. “We've got to get this trophy back to Hearst without anyone noticing…”

“We could do that…” Sakura said. “... or we could plant it at Kepler and get Ace caught!”

“I like that! Let's really stick it to Ace!” Mia agreed. “Sorry Rosalyn, but your little boyfriend needs to go down.”

“This isn’t about my… whatever it is I have with him,” Rosalyn interjected, exasperated. “Right now, we need to stick to the plan and get the trophy back where it belongs.”

“Taking the trophy back to Hearst is the safer option,” Nishan said. “We know the layout of Hearst pretty well, so we can probably bypass the faculty, even if they're on high-alert after the theft…”

“Hey, I don't mind making Max look stupid for trying to blame us for the missing trophy,” Julian said with a chuckle.

“It’s settled, then,” Rosalyn said. “We’re leaving the trophy at Hearst.”

“We better hurry, then,” Wes said.

Within a few minutes, the group snuck back to Hearst High. While Nishan distracted a group of teachers with a conversation about black holes, Julian, Rosalyn, and Wes snuck the trophy back into its case.

“Rest assured, Max. When I take a trophy from you, it'll be on the gridiron,” he said with a grin before following Rosalyn and the others away.

Rosalyn and her friends regrouped on campus.

“I’m still not sure why you’d decide to protect Ace after he just tried to frame us,” Mia said, placing her hands on her hips.

Rosalyn let out a frustrated sigh. “Look, I’m not protecting Ace. Trust me, I’m just as pissed off about this as you guys are. But we have to think this through rationally.”

“Oh, don’t give us that bullcrap, Rose,” Wes said, eying her suspiciously.

“I… what?”

“Rosalyn, come on. We know there’s something up with you and Ace suddenly dating after he showed you his true colors,” Wes said. Before Rosalyn could retort, he continued. “You didn’t honestly think I bought the lovey-dovey act between you two? Does he have dirt on you?”

"No, he doesn't," Rosalyn said defensively. "Look, I know how it looks, but I know what I’m doing.”

“Then explain it,” Julian said, crossing his arms. “Why on earth are you dating Ace?”

She huffed. “If you must know. We are dating, but not really.”

“Come again?” Nishan said incredulously.

“As far as the student body knows, we’re in love and everything’s fine,” Rosalyn explained.

“But in reality?” Julian led on.

Rosalyn let out a long sigh. “In reality, I’m only with him so I can keep an eye on him and figure out how to stop him,” she admitted. "And he wants to do the same with me."

“You’re dating him to spy on him?” Nishan said. “That’s so… Machiavellian.”

"In a way, yes,” Rosalyn said with a hint of guilt in her voice. "He knows I'm onto him as much as he's onto me. It's just a matter of who gets the upper hand."

"What a tangled web you weave," Nishan mumbled, shaking his head. Wes looked amused.

They get interrupted by an uproar of disappointment. Rosalyn and her friends turn to find the school’s principal talking to Max and the Hearst football team.

“What? That's a lie! I know Julian and Rosalyn took it! Check again!” Max demanded, fixing Rosalyn and her friends with a hard sneer. “Mark my words. We're gonna find that trophy.”

“Oh I’m sure!” Rosalyn called back.

The following day, Rosalyn texted Ace in advance that she would be driving herself to school from now on. He respected her wishes.

After an hour of calculus, Rosalyn stepped into the hallway to find a group of students gathered around the entrance and talking excitedly.

“What's going on over here?” she asked.

“We're planning a welcoming party for our newest classmate. You're just in time!” one classmate said. At least some people weren’t still mad at her.

“I'm thinking gold-encrusted abalone salad for the appetizer…” another murmured. Rosalyn fought back an eyeroll.

“As long as it comes with a side of school spirit, I'm in!” the third one added.

“Awfully extravagant for a new student. What’s their name?” Rosalyn asked. 

“Hm, the paperwork here says his name is... Bartholomew,” the first classmate said.

Rosalyn accidentally let an “Oh, fuck!” slip from her mouth. All three classmates looked at her with bewilderment. “I-I mean. I… I can’t believe it!”

The crowd of students parted, revealing the new student adjusting his cuffs.

“Rosalyn,” Ace said. “Aren’t you going to say hi?”

Ace strolled through the crowd of students welcoming him as he made his way to Rosalyn.

“Ace…” she fixed a grin at him. “You’re here.”

“I’ve missed you, Rosie. It’s been too long.”

“It’s only been less than a day,” she giggled, falling back into the role of devoted girlfriend as Ace took her hand and kissed the back of it. He pulled her close, and with everyone watching, Rosalyn moved in to kiss him on the lips.

Ace deepened the kiss for a brief moment before pulling away as the students around them whooped and hollered. He put his arm around Rosalyn as he looked around, the smile on his face not quite meeting his eyes.

The crowd let out a chorus of “awws”. Rosalyn pulled away and gave Ace a gentle smile.

“What are you doing here?” She asked.

“I hear this is the best school in the district. You just won the Hamilton Internship, didn't you? Why wouldn't I want to be here?”

Her smile dimmed and she moved in closer to Ace. “What's the deal, Ace? I know you're planning something.”

“It's not nice to accuse someone without proof, Rosalyn. I thought you would've learned that yesterday after Max Warren's visit,” he taunted. “Funny how that business with the trophy turned out, isn't it?”

“Not really. Someone found it at Hearst. It got misplaced. Big deal.”

“Mmm… that’s not the story going around,” Ace said. 

Just then, the previous three classmates surrounded Ace! The second classmate clapped him on the shoulders!

“Ace, my good man! You're not just the consummate politician, you're a hero, too!” he cheered.

“Yeah, the way you negotiated with that thief to return the trophy to Hearst was so cool!” the first classmate added.

Ace shot Rosalyn a wink.

“You've got to be kidding me.” she said. 

“I never kid. I happened to uncover proof that a classmate of mine at Kepler... a good friend in fact... had been the one who stole the trophy,” Ace continued. He then fixed his eyes on her, a fire in his eyes unseen by anyone else. “He was a very close friend of mine, Rosie. I really hate that I had to turn him in.”

“You're a true captain in choppy waters, Ace,” the third classmate said.

“You flatter me. I just did what needed doing. Couldn't let your school take the fall,” he said before pulling out a freshly minted ID card. “Or should I say... our school.”

Still smiling, Rosalyn pulled Ace away from her classmates. “Well, that’s awesome, let me show you around!”

Rosalyn led him away from the crowd of students. In a secluded spot, she spun him around until his back was against the lockers. The look on her face was stern and determined.

“Okay, what’s your deal?” she asked. “Why the hell would you leave Kepler?”

“I didn't. Not entirely,” he answered. “Your esteemed school offers a pottery class open to any student in the district. I just enrolled.”

“Here? You... you can't do this.”

“But Rosie,” he said. “You always said everyone was welcome here. Time to see if you mean it. Besides, I thought you’d be happy to see me around more often?”

“Oh cut the bullshit, Ace,” she snapped.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said with a smirk. “Maybe… I’m just here because I missed you.”

“Whatever you have planned, Ace, you know I'll stop you,” she warned him.

“I know you'll try. You still have that fire I saw in you that very first day,” he said with a smile. He closed in, cupping her face with his hand. “It's a shame. We could've accomplished such great things together, you and me....”

Rosalyn looked away, trying to ignore the way just one touch from his hands made her heart flutter. She pushed his hand away.

“Spare me the dramatics. If we can’t be something great it’s because YOU made it that way.”

“Anyways, they say if you want something done right, you just have to do it yourself,” he said with a sigh. Ace walks away, his footsteps echoing in the deserted hall.

“Ace…”

Without turning around, he said, “You know, I heard your school has an open Council seat. Maybe it's time I used all my political experience to run for office myself…”

With that, he walked into the pottery class, the door slamming shut behind him. Rosalyn looked beside herself and saw a poster of her face branded with a red X with the words “Take back your school!”

Ripping the poster down with a scowl, she said, “I will.”

[ayoyoungg]

Because I got sucked into the drama on Twitter, I watched Popstar Academy (would not have otherwise):

First, I hate survival shows. I’m just like keep that stuff within the company and start showing us material once you’ve chosen the people for the group. I know every company goes through that process of selecting people for the debut group but I’m not a fan of seeing it.

Reason I say this is because I understand & get people having star power or certain people always being in the lineup because they fit what the company is looking for. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. In fact I think that’s the industry. But the way this show was formatted and presented to the girls, they went in thinking something else. Which I’m not sure what they were pitched vs if it was naïveté. (Also, it seems like only a small percentage of the girls were actually familiar with or fans of kpop, just an observation).

Having like 8 or so trainees join LATE, and picking trainees that didn’t even have singing or dancing background was certainly a choice. Like the show made the initial training group feel like a pre-training to get the girls where they need to be for the actual training/show. It’s a typical Netflix thing but I feel like some of the later trainees could’ve really benefitted from being there from the start. Especially since the show had some of the girls really starting from ground 1.

It turning into a survival show halfway through was VERY messed up, especially considering how many girls kept asking before they agreed to the program if it would be a survival show. That contract must have either been very vague with the wording or small font or something.

As the program was happening live, I think I only saw the Buttons performance. I wasn’t paying much attention to the program because I wasn’t interested. That said, the survival show didn’t even make sense if it was solely based on the performances & whatever content the girls chose to post on social media. I understand wanting to gauge fan interest in the girls but like idk have test groups? They should know any time there’s fan voting it’s biased as hell. There should always be a percentage taken into account with fan voting vs judge voting. But anyways, what makes this survival show weird is that part of what affects choosing favorites in other survival shows (like p101) is that you get to see the trainees interact with each other. Even though mnet evil edits, you see through the show who has leadership skills, who’s caring, who’s hardworking, who gets along, who’s improved, etc. All of that was missing when the program was live?! (unless I’m wrong) We’re only learning this stuff through the documentary. I’m only using this as an example but the girls were so shocked Manon scored high, but viewers didn’t know about the missed practices & stuff. Had viewers known, would Manon have scored so high? Who knows (she def has it girl + charisma, so very likely, but you see my point)

On Manon, as I alluded to before, I think it def would’ve been better if she were in that starting trainee group. While some things were missed due to covid which is excusable, it seems that other classes/training were missed just because. It has me curious if something serious irl was going on or what the cause was, but I suppose that’s her business. Classes/training are important. Personally, it would affect my choice of a bias if I knew that they skipped a lot and broke rules such as missing curfew a lot. That said, I do appreciate that she does show up & out when the time calls for it. I’m not sure if the girls really did isolate her or if anyone at least made an attempt to check on her. I understand the frustration of someone who consistently breaks the rules not getting penalized in some way. I’m glad Manon held herself accountable and really showed up at the end.

This program being in partnership with Hybe is so…🙃 to me. For example, Bang PD discussing the plateau in trainee growth and urging them to debut faster. Meanwhile Hybe groups are on blast about their short trainee times and the need to develop skills further. We start seeing more & more injuries in the girls and it’s like maybe if they took the time to further their training and learn how to properly do things, the amount of injuries could lessen. And then the emphasis on social media, developing a fandom, and discussing the parasocial relationship — felt very Hybe. Like yes social media skills are needed but the way they discussed creating the fandom was kinda 🙃 to me. Like the fandom is going to form. Those who were less comfortable/confident/familiar with posting on social media were at a disadvantage. And with them suddenly being thrown into a survival show, it’s not like they were prepared to appeal themselves to the public yet. I don’t think it should have been so important for them to necessarily be good at social media yet. That’s something I think could have been saved for the debut group (or maybe if they KNEW from the beginning it’d be a survival show with that type of format, more of the trainees would be those good at social media). But with how this survival show was formatted, social media was the only way to learn anything about their character.

[thoughtportal]

An altar honoring Aaron’s life, at a vigil his friends held in remembrance of him on February 27.

As Aaron recounted to his comrades in a mutual aid group in San Antonio, he grew up in a very Christian conservative white enclave in Cape Cod. He was 18 years old when Donald Trump was elected; he joined the Air Force in 2019. While in the Air Force, he arrived at anarchist politics through a process of self-education.

In February 2023, Aaron prepared a document aimed at helping this group to become more cohesive. As another participant in the group told us, “Aaron sought to formalize and mature some of our organizing methods, and he felt that having deep and open discussion was a crucial first step for building long-term trust. He created a list of questions as a way for our ragtag group of lefties doing mutual aid to start a conversation with each other.”

In his own answers to these questions, Aaron states:

I am an anarchist, which means I believe in the abolition of all hierarchical power structures, especially capitalism and the state… I view the work we do as fighting back in the class war which the capitalist class wages on the rest of humanity. This also informs the way in which I want to organize, as I believe that any hierarchical power structure is bound to reproduce class dynamics and oppression. Thus, I want to engage in egalitarian forms of organizing that produce horizontal power structures based on mutual aid and solidarity, which are capable of liberating humans… I favor consensus-based decision-making over “democratic” or voting-based governance.

In the same document, Aaron explained why he was committed to doing mutual aid work in solidarity with the unhoused:

I’ve always been bothered by the reality of homelessness, even back when I was growing up in a conservative community. I have come to believe in the importance of solidarity politics and I view the enforcement of homelessness as a major front in the class war which must be challenged for all our sakes. I view helping my houseless neighbors as a moral obligation, a matter of social justice, and a matter of good politics. If I don’t stand with those more marginalized than me today then who will be left to stand with me tomorrow. I view enforced homelessness as a societal failing and a crime against humanity. I believe that no one deserves to be deprived of basic human necessities. I believe that homelessness as an involuntary condition must be abolished.

In the following three accounts, Aaron’s friends share their memories of who he was and how his life touched their lives.

Aaron and friends watching a solar eclipse.

“Aaron Will Live Forever”

Lupe

Aaron will live forever. I know this, because everyone who was loved by Aaron will carry a bit of him in their soul, and everyone who witnessed his sacrifice will carry him in their minds. Aaron cherished life. He knew that in giving up his own, he could give the people of Palestine a chance to keep theirs. Aaron has permanently changed the fabric of your being. You know this because for the rest of your life, you will wrestle with the thought of what you will sacrifice for the liberation of others.

Aaron Bushnell.

“He Was Someone We Really Needed”

T Bear

It seems a lot of people just saw Aaron as someone in the military. Online lefties and liberal media alike were quick to dispose of his words and actions, and choose instead to judge him based on puritanical ideals just as bad as the ones he’s been trying to escape his entire adult life.

I write this knowing it will be read by comrades. I want to say something profound that can make us reflect on why we have such a tendency to be so quick to treat others as disposable, but I don’t think I can. I hope that instead, you will carry the burden of finding an answer to that with me.

After a lifetime of engaging with anarchists, it was this recently radicalized, 25-year-old active-duty airman I spent two years with who showed me my chains—long before his decision to leave this earth. Aaron had this effect on every single person he met. He was incredibly committed to developing relationships based on deep trust and understanding—and would be the first to give you the raised brows for a snarky answer to an important question. He never let a potential harm go unaddressed. He embodied more than anyone I know the anarchist spirit, “that deeply human sentiment, which aims at the good of all, freedom and justice for all, solidarity and love among the people.”1

An altar honoring Aaron’s life, at a vigil his friends held in remembrance of him on February 27.

“My Friend Aaron”

E

My friend Aaron was kind, compassionate, and principled, sometimes to the point of being annoying, and he was incredibly reflective and willing to change to meet my needs in our relationship. He was one of my quickest and best friends.

An altar honoring Aaron’s life at the vigil at which Aaron’s friend read this text aloud.

Cult

I want to provide some background context on Aaron’s life. He shared this with me in confidence, but I feel OK sharing it with you all now because he is gone and I want to help contextualize him for you all. The press has also reached out to people from his past so it will be coming out regardless and I think it’s better y���all learn from a comrade.

Being raised in a cult, essentially a small society with different cultural norms than ours, gave Aaron the ability to see and better identify the norms and qualities of our society that are harder for us to see because we have been conditioned within it. He could see the latent fascist logic and cult-like tendencies that we swim through every day. He could see and feel them in ways that I struggle to feel and understand beyond an intellectual level. He was always very cagey about his past and did his best not to lie. You may recall him saying things like “sort of” or “something like that” whenever he was asked questions about being in theatre or band.

Times He Changed and Reflected

We would text and I would accuse him of texting like a straight man (which he was). He would never use reaction emojis or punctuation or expressions of laughter like lol. It was incredibly annoying. And he made such an active effort to do those things after I asked him to, very quickly and consistently.

Aaron with his beloved cat, Sugar.

Principled

Aaron saw hierarchy and injustice and his role in those systems and hated it. He felt a lot of guilt because of the situation he was raised in; guilt was the primary emotion through which he engaged with most things. I feel very sad that he was not able to heal from that fully before this.

He had so much love for his cats. The contradictions of owning someone you love weighed on him heavily. He was constantly thinking of how to best accommodate them and navigate this relationship of domination, complete control of their agency. I saw how it genuinely distressed him.

Aaron refused to say words like crazy, insane, or lame due to their roots in ableism and he got on me for my use of the word lame constantly. He wouldn’t say the word fuck because he saw its roots in misogyny and hetero-patriarchy.

Aaron also didn’t like the word democracy for reasons that are too long to explain; we would argue about it a lot, it was kind of a recurring bit.

Aaron serving food in Ohio as part of the mutual aid organization Serve the People Akron. “Aaron was a valued member of our organization and the community who immediately jumped in to help the unhoused and any project that came up. He was dependable and persistent with the mutual aid work he did in a city that was still new to him. We will be forever grateful for the effort he put in to make Akron a better place.”

Excerpts

I was very vulnerable and open with Aaron and I am proud of that. Vulnerability builds trust and deepens our bonds with each other; it is something that I actively work to cultivate in myself. To that end, I would like to share excerpts from two things I wrote to Aaron.

All of our relationships change us, shape us. When I look at the people, the friends, who I love the most, the people who I have the most secure loving relationships with, I can mark the ways that they have changed me. The mannerisms, habits, forms of speech, or worldviews that I adopted from them. It makes me feel so proud and thankful. There is no doubt that you have already changed me in ways that I will be proud of and thankful for, but I feel that one of the things that hurts most is mourning the loss of the ways that you could change me… I wish I could know you more. There are so many other things I want to know about you and so many other things I want you to know about me. I wish I could get to see firsthand your continuing political development and I wish we could have closer impacts on each other’s development. I wish you could see mine, to change it and make me into a better revolutionary. I want to see you in struggle, to learn how to struggle next to you and to struggle with you. I want you to be here.

I keep imagining you here. Upon reflecting I am imagining you here but not as I know you, I am imagining you here and free. Free of your military indenturement. It brings me so much joy to imagine you free and in struggle, to imagine your joy.

Conclusion

I think it will be hard to grieve this loss without being able to be with his body. To not get to experience the physical and psychological effects of being with his body after he is gone.

I am feeling tiny and crushed by the magnitude and inertia of the systems we are fighting against. I feel tiny and helpless in the face of these systems that have existed for hundreds of years and will likely exist for hundreds more. I normally feel quite the opposite but right now I feel so small. How in this world do we find peace that is not complicity? I hope Aaron found his.

Aaron and his friends.

I want to end with two things, some words from Aaron’s will and a poem that he had been practicing to recite once he was out of the military.

From Aaron’s will:

“I am sorry to my brother and my friends for leaving you like this. Of course, if I was truly sorry, I wouldn’t be doing it. But the machine demands blood. None of this is fair.”

“I wish for my remains to be cremated. I do not wish for my ashes to be scattered or my remains to be buried as my body does not belong anywhere in this world. If a time comes when Palestinians regain control of their land, and if the people native to the land would be open to the possibility, I would love for my ashes to be scattered in a free Palestine.”

[khiphop-discussions]

RAP:PUBLIC Ep.5 Part 2 Thoughts

Rap:public ep.5 part 2! I think this will end up being 3 parts.

Here's part 1

So we start back off at the deathmatch. 6/12 will stay and the others will leave.

James An starts. Then people vote. Then next person.

So far everyone is doing well at doing an acapella rap.

Leo messed up his rap so I'm sure he'll be eliminated. However, his rap would have been pretty good without that.

Goldbuuda was not as strong as others. I think he'll be gone too.

Churry is good but some people mentioned he's done the rap before do that might impact votes.

Yang Kyle is a standout for me.

Bizzy is unique.

Hash Swan and Bizzy tie so they must do another performance

Gamma starts crying. Bizzy almost cries too. He has too hold it back because he heard his team cheering for him. Awww

Mckdaddy survives. Jeffrey White. James An, Reddy, Yang Kyle. Hash Swan.

Leo, Churry, Bizzy, Mason Home, Goldbudda, and Kang Hyuk. This sicks cause wasn't Kang Hyuk one who did relatively well?

Long story short I misunderstood the deathmatch again lol. It's basically everybody vs everybody. No teams. Individual evaluation. Idk why it's been so hard for me to understand. They've explained it like 4 times now lol

Anyway, after eliminations/deathmatch the winning blocks got food and jack daniels delivered to their block.

I wonder why Mason Home wanted to go home? He asked to be put up.

Anyway, never doubting Haon again! He's doubting himself now though. He's a great leader. He takes everything SO hard cause he takes his responsibility to his teammates so seriously. It's not just cause he's wanting to have power/not be eliminated. He really seems to understand that he's in service to the people he's leading, #Haon4President

Block 6 is looking to recruit as is 8. Kaogaii calls Since to talk. He also goes for mckdaddy. Since he was voted in he feels disgruntled. Also, he's already on pretty good friends with Kaogaii outside the show. So I'm sure it'll be much easier to recruit him.

Then the next morning. I can't believe these 5 episodes filmed in ONE day! We see some of the guys starting their day with a workout. Reddy makes his block coffee. Block 1 is drawing each other on theeir phones lol.

Fleeky Bang couldn't sleep cause he was too nervous for his team. Polo and Tray B went to get him. Asked if they could join Block 1. Block 7 mostly uses English Polo and Tray were kinda left out. They don't think the teamwork was all the way there. So they ended up joining officially. Block 1 is really strong performance wise now.

Polodared starts crying. I guess he went through a lot at block 7? I guess he really felt left out?

Block 8 tried to recruit...LOOPY?!? They said "fuck it we'll try anything!" Everybody shot them down. Damn. I do think Block 8 can win deathmatches. Maybe not TEAM challenges since many other teams are strong as a group but put them against other certain rappers individually and most of them would likely win. We saw that during the Block Breaker. They put up a good fight.

Since rejects Kaogaii's offer. I expected that. Seems like she already has it pretty good on her team and has no reason to switch.

Block 5 is trying to recruit. But they are kinda halfway joking/half way serious lol

Mckdaddy feels bad but seems like he'll do it. He doesn't want to do it in front of Khundi Panda. Nah, lowkey I'd probably be a bit intimidated by Khundi too lol.

It gets back to his team. Luci was told and she told Khundi. He's waiting RIGHT outside but he leaves. They still shake hands. Khundi said "You should've picked a better block." Lol at least he recognizes Mckdaddy's talent.

Khundi is able to recognize that Mckdaddy must not feel safe/secure on the team. Mckdaddy still says he was ashamed but Khundi seems understanding based on what he said.

But at the block Khundi does admit frustration. As does JP and Luci

Anyway, it's time to discuss leadership changes.

Loopy says he wants to give leadership away because he's confident and is ok even if he loses the deathmatch. He doesn't want to throw someone in who isnt. Khan steps up to be leader. That was very attractive of him lol. Very ambitious and confident.

Haon wants to change leadership to Reddy. He feels like he's the most leader like. While I do think Haon is a great leader so far, it does seem like it'll be really stressful. He's taking it REALLY seriously. Reddy probably can roll with the punches better since he's older and has likely experienced/survived enough stress to be more resilient. People say that the most qualified/capable people to be leaders don't want to be them. I believe that to a certain extent too. Obviously, there's exceptions (hoping Khan turns out to be one lol) but I believe this to be a good generalization.

Anyway, It's almost 2AM so I gotta sleep! I'm about 2 hours in to the episode so I watch the last 37 minutes soon! Good night!

[doctorguilty]

Therapy log

I did a therapy session yesterday in which I did an exercise pretending to be on a sinking boat and choosing who gets to get on the life boat as like a follow up to the thing going over my patterns of like, being unable to distinguish my own feelings from others, which is exactly what ended up happening after assessing my choices and notes on what I was saying at the end and I was nxjdjjdkkd hm. And she was also like "it also took you until the ..2nd to last person to choose to save yourself" and I'm already thinking like yeah it's literally embarrassing I actually said I wanted to live and get on the boat like, I know I'm selfish for that, And she's like "it's very rare for anyone ever to not almost immediately say they're getting on the life boat" and I'm like, wait what ,,,,, 😶 and I like argued this (lightheartedly) I was like no surely even people who don't actally mean it would just lie anyway to seem righteous like in a performative right? And she's like no at this point in therapy it's like an established space where essentially they're not performing anything to me they're being honest and candid.

And like I guess the point I'm about to make here is not encouraging any kind of like discussion whether or not I think it Is right or wrong to save oneself I think for the purpose of like, therapy, and exposing the pattern that I, as an individual, am so utterly incapable of thinking of myself as a person worthy of life, it feels BAD in a fictional not real circumstance to even consider myself equally worthy of life to any other human being on the planet, and that's my problem that's like going back to my other post where i don't even know what my own feelings are, most of my existence seems to be this vicarious emotional weave that I feel threatened when someone tries to unravel because I have no idea how to be my own person without it, I don't know how to exist for myself and not others. Think I've make progress from where I USED to be, I think when I eventually unbox more abusive relationship lore to my therapist she's gonna be like holy hell, because it took a lot to cut what felt like, just, full on cordyceps flowing all through my body (if I were an ant or perhaps a spider) because that's how far I was like serving the demands of others and erasing myself

And actually that wasn't the point I was going to make here the point I wanted to make was it occurs to me this website is SO FUCKING unhealthy like I mean I knew it to all sorts of degrees but it's definitely making me worse than I even realize like, the way the user base here approaches like suffering and (VERY PERFORMATIVELY IN PLENTY OF CASES) puts all this shit out there like, if you even think of your own well being when other people are suffering you're evil for real, like you know how we keep saying "this site is a saw trap for people with moral OCD", I like recognize things in a 3rd person pov with like other traits I'm familiar with but I have to wonder if nearly every time I eat food or spend money or anything, I cannot stop thinking "someone else needs/deserves this more and I'm selfish for experiencing it instead" and it's an active battle every bite of a sandwich to tell myself these are most definitely disordered thoughts there's no way that's normal. Ignore it. Don't break down into tears (I lose sometimes), just have to wonder of that's moral OCD too (i defs have OCD symptoms in general just other types I am more sure of), though regardless it surely must be something

The way I cope with it tends to be like a telling myself I have to secure my life mask before securing others kind of thing, and also like the world NEEDS to keep spinning, contrary to the beliefs of people chronically online who's politics are like, "I don't vote I don't participate in anything I make transgressvie posts online and await the glorious revolution from my gamer chair" like the person who's income is like making non essential goods still needs to put food on their table and stuff like we can't just cancel everything and live on bread and cheese and wear rags until the world heals because that will kill everyone who's jobs aren't making bread or cheese or rags or delivering them, do you get me

But then you log into this site and get a barrage of like reinforcement of disordered thoughts about morality like actually you are in fact a horrible person for buying a $6 fancy beverage instead of donating that money to charity and my brain is like oh God oh my God oh crap, like this Can't be good for me and how DEEP my hole is, you know, like I'm not just some guy addicted to treating myself and not knowing when someone else should get a slice of my pie I'm in a PIT so deep every time I take a shower I feel guilty for wasting clean water on myself someone else could drink that I have NO WAY of giving to anyone I can't even if I wanted to like 😐

Anyway it's not to say I want to like Quit social media necessarily I'm just kinda in my initial realization phase that it's like worse than I thought, and like I'm sure it's not all done by people making a performance of their armchair activism but I think what they're doing is like throwing fuel into an echo chamber of like, other people like experiencing these things as disordered thoughts but aren't recognizing them as such so instead and posing them as like true ethical Facts and shipping it off to the disordered echo chamber of it.

Idk like I think it might be kinda Messed Up, like, recently I saw this one post where someone like like aggressively ripping some other person apart for saying like "it's not normal for the human mind to comprehend so much suffering" re: current event and being like AND THATS WHY YOU SHOULD CARE YOU SELFISH IGNORAMUS (paraphrasing idk) and it's like, you're putting words in mouths man like who's saying no one should care, it's not an unreasonable statement to simply say this is not normal and is surely psychologically overwhelming for people, to deny even just the very recognition of that, imo, is exactly the kind of shit that makes this site a saw trap for people with moral ocd like why are you trying to be the worst psychologist on earth on Tumblr

Anyway so. Idk. Much to think about 😔 i suppose

[americanrecord]

what religious inspiration did you use for each character? and are they currently religious in the series?

(i notice you reblog a lot of imagery)

<333

hiii <3 omg there must be a religious zealot on the loose, just saw an ask like this!! but i love the question as religion, in a way, is like the centerpiece of this work. at least for half the characters.

side-note, one of the biggest things to me about these characters was fitting them into the pre-existing historical context, so it’s why i’ll make a lot of historical references here and in the text. it’s important to me that these characters feel like they existed in the time period i designed them to, and not like i was just dropping them there and saying: stick! i’m also really interested in religion for an atheist, so…i was carefully to put my energy and extensive research into fleshing these out!! this got so long…

so i’ll start easiest — kit knows no god and owes no god, he’s atheist & religion doesn’t play a role in his personal philosophy in the slightest. he is, however, a gay man in the 1980s/90s, meaning other people will project their religion onto him.

but it’s not something he pays mind to. (or any extra mind to, as—for example—lex would). he faces the world with two middle fingers, but it’s ignorant to think he wouldn’t be affected by half of society opposing how he loves. he was kicked out of his parents house at 18 for his sexuality, and it definitely was based on religion, but they were also reaganites, so that says enough. he was also already on his way out; kid with a calling for punk wasn’t gonna last in a “just say no!” household. [also, as an italian-irish man, his family was catholic, and regan did win half the catholic vote (majority of those being white, thus…)]. anyway, no religion.

inez’s parents are both puerto rican immigrants, where 75-85% percent of the population is roman catholic. thus, she was raised catholic, and her family still is catholic — she, however, does not adhere and never really has. she has no sort of catholic trauma or anything [no more than the average catholic]. (though, i think she does tend toward the moral black-and-whiteness of somebody raised devoutly religious.)

it was something she lost interest in early on and not necessarily something her parents forced on her. one thing about inez — you aren’t going to tell her how to think. her parents knew that, her parents love her to death but openly acknowledge her as an odd one out, so they didn’t put their energy into that anymore than they did anything else. it led to a fair bit of distance, but so did inez pursuing art, and that definitely caused a larger rift than inez no longer attending mass after the age of like 15-16. i do know she’s confirmed, but it was more of a going through the motions thing versus some big coming-of-age, world-ending moment that it was for valerie. thus, no religion materializes in her imagery/vibe because she doesn’t revere a god.

she is still spiritual, however. honestly, if anybody were to get into things like astrology, crystals, tarot — anything like that — it would be her. she doesn’t, but some might assume so because she has very 90s whimsigoth feel. she’s not even extremely spiritual though, she just thinks there is an afterlife and a higher power (somebody watching over), but she doesn’t know what. agnosticism therefore might be an interesting concept for her. she does treasure things like meditation, and nature, and kindness, but not even because she’ll “go somewhere bad if she doesn’t” but because she finds it personally beneficial to her life and her own happiness.

steven: jewish! he’s jewish and he’s proud of it. this being more from an ethnic standpoint — he’s an ethiopian jew — because he’s not super strict otherwise/religiously. i think he definitely kept kosher growing up (his family still does), and he tries his best to in his adult life, but he’s not 100% perfect all the time. this is solely because of his life’s context — being a starving artist and then a traveling artist for most of his young-adult life, he would sometimes take what he could get. he still, however, avoids pig meat and stuff from the hindquarters of an animal (not that he’s getting many expensive steaks early in his career), and he washes his fruits and veggies throughly (inez shoved these down his throat) — not only for the kosher aspect of it, but because not washing your fruits/veggies is gross.

he also wears a silver star of david always and celebrates hanukah and observes other jewish holidays, if only casually. he might spend time with his family during these times. inez made sure to set up a menorah on the window sill beside the christmas tree. i really like to think post-series, into domesticity, it’s a lot easier for him to abide by the rules and customs of his religion, but i do think he struggles with a bit of the faith-based aspect of it as a gay man. still, he’s proud of his heritage and religion.

again, atheist. like kit, he really has no interest in religion, but he does take up more of a philosophical approach to life than kit does. when he’s miserable, we see a little bit of nihilism and misanthropy peek into the way he views the world. but he acknowledges no spirits or gods or really any presence of a higher power (or an afterlife beyond the ones that most people just casually reference in conversation — i.e. saying/thinking your dead mother is watching over you even if you don’t actually believe in heaven, just because it’s a comforting thought.

his father is white, basic protestant (but died in vietnam when dean was like two so nobody cares), but his mother is syrian. she speaks arabic and did bring this cultural influence into dean’s life—but she was also not muslim (was raised so) so much as she was spiritual. by the time she got to america (one of the things lex and dean bond over were their immigrant mothers), she was much more interested in the wide-open topic of “religious freedom” and just experimenting and learning about all of the faiths the country had to offer. evangelism, islam, judaism, hinduism, buddhism, catholicism, pentecostalism, all the isms, you name it — every branch. dean cites that his mother would “change her religion every week” because she liked to sit in on different services and hear the messages, visit booths at craft fairs, talk to strangers, etc, because she was just fascinated by humankind and their tendency toward higher power more so than she was finding one for herself.

the day dean and lex met, she was sitting in on a service of lex’s father’s. lex came out of the church afterward, saw dean sitting in the lawn (because he never really tagged along), and recognized him from school so he approached him, and…history from that point onward. it was this respect for religion without the ownership of religion’s oppressive tendencies that lex sooo loved about dean’s mother. she was a very comforting mother figure to him. dean’s mother also had him when she was 16, and right about the counterculture/summer of love time, so she just very much had a open mind to everything + faced everything with love. she was very supportive of dean when she learned he was in love with lex.

but, anyway! dean shucked all of that the moment she died. very much said to himself that none of her religions could save her so he therefore had no interest in pursuing them himself.

born and bred in the backwoods of indiana before moving to detroit, lex was raised in an iron-fist evangelist household. the fourth great awakening had a grip on the foster family and took up every aspect of his life. still does, in a way. his father was a reverend at a local matchbox chapel in indiana before they moved for…reasons, and then became involved in something a little more consolidated/concrete in the city, but he’s a preacher’s son through and through. and it’s funny that his father married a russian woman, because he is the stock character for what you think of when you think red scare/mccarthyism/nixon-era silent majority/bible-banging archie bunker/jesus freak, but that’s another topic of conversation (his father’s tendency toward pursuing what he opposes so he can subjugate it).

thus, not only was lex raised in a household that breathed the fear of god into everything (including all forms of media (even the comics lex loved as a child) and therefore lived a very oppressive, very unhappy, very dreary (some might say totalitarian like the conditions his mother escaped after fleeing russia post missile crisis) childhood, he was also raised in an abusive household. so there was the mental hell of borderline fundamentalist christianity and also the physical abuse of his father (and the neglect of his mother when it mattered). it was a miserable childhood until he made a friend in dean at age 14.

thus, realistically, one can imagine the effect this has a on a person, and lex found himself unable to let it go. he is still religious and will always, but in his own way. in his very specific, very cherry-picked, very very personal way. he rejects common christian principles of homophobia, bible-based racism (just racism in general, but you know what i mean), anti-choice politics, strict creationism in schools, and the subjugation of women. he’s very violently left-leaning politically, is very out-spoken about it, and it’s quite obvious in the way he carries himself that he has a very progressive state of mind despite what he was instilled with. he also could not care less about other people and their religion, meaning — he’s not one to impose. valerie, naturally—while catholicism falls under christianity—arrives into his life with common religious trauma but a few different beliefs because protestantism =/= catholicism. there are differences far beyond the imagery and far beyond what they’ll ever see eye to eye on, solely because they were force-fed different things.

still, he struggles. he acknowledges there is a god, but he feels betrayed, he feels at times abandoned, and he feels always watched regardless. he has a very strict moral code as seen in somebody religious (albeit one skewed) and he struggles with things like honesty, right/wrong, and just a sense of balance in general. if he’s not holy and justified, he’s immoral and evil. this is just the consequnece—plain and simple—of being hated not only by your father for seventeen years of your life before being ultimately kicked out for failing to fulfill the standards of a golden son he never will be, but being told — in conjunction — that god hates you too. there’s a constant war between: yes, i know god hates me and well, i hate god too, and the subsequent desire to please god that comes from the first and the subsequent guilt of blasphemy in the second.

he won’t ever let go of this, but he will find god on his own terms by the series’ end and will settle his soul in a way that doesn’t tear him to shreds to do it. it’s all he wants/it’s all he prays for — to have god in peace. because of that, religion absolutely permeates his vibe. he’s tattooed up and down the stretch with reminders, he wears his cross, it’s major fodder for his art, because there is nothing that makes him hurt like religion, but there’s also nothing (besides LOVE!) that makes him feel to such a degree, and he’d rather put it on track than he would keep it in his head.

and it’s very special to me for him to be able to do this, likely coming from a family with crazy evangelicals, and it’s really rewarding and fitting for his character to come to a healing place within his religion and to be accept that he doesn’t need to live like his father did because all he needs to do, really, is love his neighbor and accept the presence of jesus as his savior. (sounds so religious, but it’s simple). his religion is his problem and he never makes it anything else.

okay, i’ve arguably put the most thought into her. just because her story has been carefully tailored by me for like three and a half years now. i walked on to the scene with the desire to make a catholic character because i watched supernatural just like any other middle school girl, but it was never just about vibes and rosaries, i had a genuine interest and i have no real attachment to catholicism—so it was just a passion project to learn enough to write about a character who deals with it so in-depth.

so, yes, she’s catholic, but she fluctuates more so than any other character on whether or not she adheres to it. she wasn’t strictly raised this way either. not at first. it was a loose presence in her home until she was 13. after which her father left her, and her mother went off the deep end. she took the catholicism they already had and had her own sort of “reawakening.” valerie tells lex that her mom went crazy after her dad left, and when he asks what she means by that, she simply answers that she found god. (however, in truth, she rediscovered god). so valerie went from a very carefree, happy childhood, to an oppressive and incredibly impoverished religious household after losing her father’s mild intervention and financial assistance.

everybody knows at this point that she lived in a trailer, but she’s also the victim of a hoarding mother who notoriously quit jobs that paid in pursuit of “church service jobs” where most of her money went back to the church and the community. valerie resents her for this, saying it was lovely that they children at the drive had new coats, but that she was going without dinner at home because her mother did not routinely buy food. valerie’s aversion toward contamination comes not only from the filthy environment she was raised in, but also the fact that most of her food was not fresh (and, if it was, would spoil quickly) and was boxed/canned food and at risk of bugs/mice/or botulism. she would skip meals frequently because of this and owes her survival to free handouts at her high school — a difficult feat when she was always on display while dating danny, her quarterback football star boyfriend, who was notably wealth(ier.)

anywayyyy, so beyond the financial aspect that caused valerie to resent the solace her mother found in god and prayer, there was also the principles of the religion itself that were hard for her. her mother basically engrained in her that she was going to need a husband if she ever wanted to escape the life she’d been given (the life her mother was always making worse). she had the “sit still, look pretty” upbringing, and it made an abusive romantic relationship very difficult to leave because she was essentially told her entire teenagehood that it was the only way she was getting out of financial hell. it made being a woman difficult, essentially. she’s objectified and victimized throughout her formative years and she’s essentially told men will have their way with her and that they’re allowed to. it takes a lot of unlearning and it causes her a lot of fear, but it’s what makes her relationship with lex very important to her, because he preserves her autonomy and never encroaches on it (even when he hypocritically, strongly insists against using hard drugs lol).

but she makes it to seattle and is in state where she hasn’t really fought her religious trauma yet. lex’s is a constant battle; valerie, on the other hand, has mastered the art of repression. the last time she attended mass was the sunday before she left and she never looks back, she keeps her rosary in a drawer, she doesn’t pray (at least not until i give her reason to), and…yeah. that cross necklace is really the only mark of a “religious” girl, but she labels wearing it irony. and then the series persists, her life and her experiences muddle, and she’s forced to confront what she hasn’t and/or what she’s written off. she hasn’t actually answered any of the questions on whether or not she believes in god, and if the problem was god or the way god was thrust upon her (aka: would she be open to a higher power if it wasn’t diluted by backwards modern christian thought?). she gets to combat her catholic guilt and the sort of shame and guilt that follow her in her pursuit of hedonistic pleasure, which is aplenty in the life she lives, and she gets to cope with the ramifications she imposes on herself when hardship falls upon her — who she blames for issues out of control (herself, her mother, her father, god?).

needless to say, then, she will struggle much more than lex in terms of closing out those big open-ended questions in the sense that she doesn’t. it’s an ambitious task to untangle somebody’s religious crisis, and an unrealistic pursuit to believe she can do it in 4-5 years to perfectly fit the series after a decade and a half of hell. she might always be wondering whether there actually is a god, but she won’t fear the unknown. it may comfort her enough for lex to say that there’s no way he’s getting into heaven if she won’t, therefore at least they’ll be in hell together, which—if they’re together, then it isn’t hell. but she’ll make great strides in terms unlearning the principles of shame, guilt, male objectification, male entitlement, and the forced repression/servitude of women in religious spheres, which is more than enough of a start. she leads a lot freer of a life by time she reaches seattle and she’s practically unburdened (despite her wondering) by the series’ end.

thus — lots of imagery for her, because her religious crisis & it’s ups and down are a major part of her character’s personal journey & always have been. always will be.

thanks for asking!

[draconicsparkle]

Medium was the most voted for selection! So here we go!

Including some other characters! And some I’m sure you all will like!

And part of it was inspired by something I saw in the mountains. Have y’all ever seen a snake puddle? It’s wonderful. Does anyone want to see the pic? Let me know!

Nagito woke up on his large bed groggily. He never was a morning person, and it always took him so long to fully regain consciousness. A vast contrast to his housemate, who he could hear moving around in the kitchen somewhere below him.

He sat up, stretched, and got out from under the covers. He lazily shuffled over to the wardrobe, picking out an outfit for the day at random. He didn’t care, his brain wasn’t caught up yet.

Once properly dressed, he headed down the stairs, yawning the whole way. The scent of bacon wafted through the hallway once he reached the stair’s base, making his stomach rumble.

“I heard that. Come in and sit down. It’s almost done,” Hajime called out from the nearby kitchen.

Not wanting to disappoint, he did so. He entered the kitchen to see the naga preparing food. His tail took up a ton of room, but he was able to maneuver around with no issues. He had lots of practice.

So not concerning himself with how Hajime was doing, Nagito sat at the table. A glass of water with his pills on a napkin awaited him. It made him smile, as Hajime knew exactly which he needed. It made him feel cared for.

He must have spaced out, as suddenly a plate with steaming hot food was placed in front of him. Muffins, eggs, toast, and bacon with a glass of orange juice alongside the water. “Before you say anything, yes I am aware you probably can’t eat this all. But try to eat as much as you can, okay?”

Smiling wide, Nagito took a second to thank everything in the world for his companion. “So kind. So generous. I hope you know that I appreciate all you do for me, right?”

Hajime rolled his eyes. “Oh, I know. You thank me endlessly every time. Now eat. I’m determined to get you to gain a few pounds before your next doctor’s appointment.” He tapped the glass of water with a claw. “And take these. Eat a bite first then take them.”

Nagito nodded, picking up his fork and cutting a section of the eggs. He ate the delicious food, savoring the taste for a few moments. He then took the pills, washing them down with the water.

Seeing this relieved the naga. “Good. That should help.” He crossed his arms on the table near him and laid his head on them. “I’ll finish what you don’t eat. So it won’t go to waste.”

“Taking a breather before they arrive?” Nagito asked in between bites, unable to resist ruffling the brown hair.

Hajime grumbled, but didn’t attempt to escape. “Yeah. They will probably want to eat some cooked food since they haven’t had it in a while.”

Nagito pulled his hand back, reaching for his glass of juice. “Do you think… she has made up her mind yet?”

A reptilian hazel eye opened. “About what you asked her last time? Yeah, I’m sure she’s decided by now. And I have a feeling I know what she will choose.”

Nagito set down his glass after taking a sip. “Whichever decision she comes to, I shall respect it. She’s important to you, and thus is important to me. The same goes for your brother.”

It was quiet for the rest of breakfast, Nagito managing to eat more than half the plate by the time he pushed it over to the larger creature. “This is yours now. Thank you for the food.”

“That’s more than last week. A good sign. We are getting you to a healthy weight,” Hajime commented as he took the plate. Nagito could see the beginnings of his jaw unhinging. “I’ll clean up this and then start on lunch preparations. Want to go watch for them at the door?”

The human stood up and pushed his chair in. “Yes, I can do that.” He turned and walked to the living room, not turning around. While he found it fascinating, he knew Hajime was a bit self conscious about showing him his fully open jaw. So he left the room to ease the other’s discomfort.

He reached the glass patio door, unlocking it and opening it up. He breathed in the clean air, relaxing and gazing out to the vast forest in front of him.

There was about half a mile in between his home and the forest’s edge, but he could still tell it was an amazing forest. He owned the forest, and he fully intended to keep it protected. He hoped it would one day become a refuge for Hajime’s kind. A safe haven, away from prying eyes and hunters' traps.

And speaking of Hajime’s kind, he saw some familiar shapes moving near the forest’s edge. Their movements rustled the plantlife as they moved. And soon they were out in the open.

Two nagas. Each one very different from the other.

The smaller one was female. She was wearing a loose hoodie that was a bit big for her. It resulted in her sleeves completely covering her hands. Her silver hair was frazzled, as if she had just woken up. Her scales were light pink with darker pink splotches. Chiaki, a coral snow corn snake naga.

The other was much, much bigger. He was wearing a pristine white button up shirt that had somehow escaped getting dirty in the forest. His hair was long and luxurious, looking like a model’s. And his tail was also extremely lengthy, decorated with black scales. Izuru, Hajime’s sibling and a black mamba naga.

Mostly.

Nagito smiled sadly as he recalled what Hajime had told him about his brother. They were born in captivity, and scientists had tampered with Izuru’s egg. Hajime had served as the control in the experiment. The experiment being to inject DNA of a completely different naga species into an egg and see what hatched.

In a sense, the experiment had worked, as Izuru had hatched with the body and venom of a black mamba. But his brain was also changed by it’s embryonic confusion of what he was supposed to be. His emotions were stunted and they would never develop.

But he ended up being incredibly intelligent. So intelligent, that he managed to trick the scientists into believing he was docile and stupid. And once their guards were down, he broke himself and Hajime out. They had fled to these woods, getting accidentally separated. Which is how Hajime had found his way to Nagito’s home.

Thankfully, after some time, the brothers had been able to reunite. Izuru had found another naga, Chiaki, and had been tended to by her. They had become friends, and Hajime joined that once they met and talked.

Nagito had kept out of the initial contact, not wanting to interfere. And he would have been fine if no contact ever happened. He understood it was hard for them to trust his kind after all they did to the naga species.

At least, that had been the intention. But Hajime had grabbed him and carried him to his brother and friend. He had been flustered and nervous that entire encounter, being held like that the whole time. But luckily, they had accepted him.

So now they dropped by every once in a while to visit him and Hajime. To which Nagito welcomed them with open arms.

That was why they were making their way to the mansion. Though they were taking their time. Nagito was fine with this, as he had nothing to do today. So he just watched from his location, hearing the sounds of activity in the kitchen from the brown naga.

Chiaki and Izuru reached him after a bit, slithering up to him with no hesitation. “Hey Nagito. Good to see you,” the pink naga said, rubbing her cheek against his in greeting.

“Good to see you as well. How have you been?” he asked in return, stepping aside to let them in.

“Sleepy,” she replied, yawning wide. Too wide for a human.

But Nagito wasn’t disturbed. “Somehow, I expected that.” He turned to the black naga. “And are you doing well, Izuru?”

A nod. “Yes.” His tongue flicked, red reptilian eyes scanning the inside. “Is Hajime in the kitchen?”

“He is. He’s preparing food for lunch. Though I am not sure what.” Nagito waited until every scale was indoors before closing the glass door. “Please make yourselves at home. Let me know if there’s anything you need.” He pointed to a large crate near the fireplace. “And the vials are over there if you want them, Izuru. Clean and organized and ready for use.”

“Excellent,” the black mamba stated. “I shall do it before I leave.”

The reason for the vials was so that Izuru could inject venom into them. He produced a lot, being a black mamba. And he had decided to donate his venom to antivenom research. He didn’t need all of it, so he figured he might as well give it to someone who could use it. Proof of his change of heart on humans. Well, some of them. He definitely wasn’t planning on going out into the open.

But putting that thought aside, he went over to a room on the side and opened it up. “There’s more pillows in here. We can cover the entire floor with them. So there’s plenty. Grab what you need.”

Chiaki slithered in, grabbing an armload and carefully maneuvered out. “Soft. And comfy. You always have the best stuff.”

Nagito scratched the back of his neck. “I’m glad you approve. I want my guests to have the best.”

Chiaki dumped her armload on the ground, then turned to look at him. “Hey, about your offer… have you changed your mind? Are you sure it wouldn’t be a problem?”

Nagito shook his head. “There’s plenty of space and I have no shortage of money for food and other items you may need. If you want to, you may stay here like Hajime. You can have more opportunities to play games. I know you like them.”

Chiaki smiled. “I do. They are fun.” She glanced back at Izuru, who nodded to her. She returned to looking at Nagito. “Then yes. I accept.”

The human clapped his hands. “Wonderful! I can place orders for whatever you would like in your room. And I’m sure Hajime can give you a hand in setting things up.”

“I heard that! Are you volunteering me for work?” the brown naga shouted from the kitchen before entering the living room with his hands on his hips.

Nagito grinned at him. “Oh, don’t take it that way. It’s just that you are so strong and smart and wonderful. I thought you would be well suited for the task.”

Hajime blushed. “Nagito! Cool it with the compliments!” He sighed and looked over to his friend and sibling. “So Chiaki’s moving in? Good to have you. I’ll be sure to show you around if you get lost. It’s a pretty big house. And Izuru? You’re sure you are okay with her leaving the forest?”

The taller naga shrugged. “It is fine. I can handle myself well on my own. My visits here will be more frequent now, but I do enjoy living out in the trees.”

Hajime and Nagito each gave him a nod in understanding. The offer of housing had been extended to him as well. But he had politely turned it down. He enjoyed his pure freedom out there. And no one in this room wanted to take away his source of happiness.

Hajime cleared his throat. “Well, change of subject. The food is in the ovens. They will take about two hours to bake. So we can relax while we wait.”

Chiaki got a mischievous look in her eyes. “Does that mean…?”

Hajime nodded, also looking mischievous. “Operation Puddle shall now commence.”

Nagito was very confused. “Wait. What is-”

He didn’t have time to finish his question. He felt Izuru wind his arms around his midsection, raising him up and off the ground. He was lifted high up, the mamba tail allowing for Izuru to ascend to great heights. Nagito froze, holding tight to the arms around him.

Down below, he saw blurry shapes as Hajime and Chiaki moved quickly. There seemed to be an unspoken signal when they were ready, as Izuru lowered him back down. He was soon surrounded by warm snake tails of brown, pink, and black. It was incredibly warm and comfortable. Hajime’s head was on his left shoulder, Chiaki’s was on his right. And Izuru had laid his human torso on top of his legs.

“Ah, so this is what you meant by Operation Puddle,” he said, causing the nagas to smile.

“We are all going to rest. And that means you are too. You aren’t going to run yourself ragged while everyone is here. This ensures that,” Hajime explained with a smirk. He closed his eyes soon after, settling in for a nap. Chiaki and Izuru followed suit. Soon the human was the only one awake.

He laid there in the middle of the circle of snake tails, staring up at the ceiling. If he had told his past self that this would happen, he was sure he would not believe it. Gaining the trust of not one, but three nagas? And all cared about him?

He sighed happily as he got comfortable. If this was a dream, he certainly didn’t want to wake up.

Masterpost

[boysplanetrecaps]

Build Up Episode 8 Recap: Do Re Mi Fa, Gift

Hello! It’s time for me, BPR Unnie, to continue recapping MNET’s Build Up, episode 8! In the previous one, we saw a team with no name cover Uptown Funk and make everyone dance. In this one, we’ll see a team of balladeers sing a ballad. Will that win the night? We’ll find out! Let’s go!

Hey look!

It’s Glasses Baekho™!  He just looked so cute I had to take a screen shot. This show is so great. Isn’t this show great? 

Dahee calls the team up on stage.

They introduce themselves by singing “do-re-mi-fa,” and in a moment of brilliance, Dahee says, “And you have Do-re-mi-fa-SOLAR over there!” (Get it? Do-re-me-fa-so-la.)

Look how proud Dahee is. Hey Dahee, join my improv team! 

Solar jokes back and everyone is having a great time and I wish I were fluent in Korean! I learn two or three words a month so I’ll be fluent in a thousand years, so look forward to that! 

Glasses Baekho™ says this team is the only ballad team, and that they ranked first in the interim check. Ah, so that’s how they earned the right to choose the running order.

Junhyeok has put on a fair bit of concealer and blush, I think. But it looks good. 

We cut back to the interim check. 

OMG, new and different Glasses Baekho™? I want to collect them all! 

Baekho announces that Gwangseok’s team has ranked first place, but the team doesn’t look pleased at the news.

Junhyeok says he’s “more startled than happy” because “they don’t think we’re their competition.” The team thinks that the other guys chose them as the top tier precisely because they are NOT top tier. And… they’re right. 

Hey look, it’s Jeup and Donghun. Imagine seeing them? On this show? There they are! Hi! 

Bitsaeon explains, “Although they said to pick the top tier based on the performance, I think all teams were thinking quite strategically.” 

We see that Bitsaeon’s team was tempted to pick Jeup’s team as the best, but decided not to give them that boost. Soomin’s team would have picked Jay’s team as the best, but again, didn’t, and Sunyoul’s team thinks along the same lines.

The song they’re doing is Gift by Park Hyo Shin, a song released in 2009 that “conveys the singer’s pain and hopes”. 

Sample lyrics:

Whatever others said, I told them I’m not weak, and tolerated such days with tears They didn’t know me, and didn’t even want to listen to what I had to say Left alone in the darkness of the night, one, two, three, I count the stars and in the moment that the morning sky appears… Today, the sky seems like a gift someone left behind for me Under its warmth, stronger than yesterday’s, if you are like me, Listen to this song now, close your eyes, and when you open them once more, It’s going to be alright!!

Ah, if only they had talked to me. I could have told them that songs with a “it’s going to be alright!” messages always (1) get the audience clapping and singing and long and (2) lose. Always. Find me a time that a “it’s going to be alright” song on any Produce/Planet type show has ever, ever won. They often come in last place! I don’t know why. Everyone enjoys them, and no one votes for them. 

Bitsaeon, Donghun, and Soomin voice over things like, “It was a predictable song” and “They did what they’re used to doing” and “It’s the same every round.” 

Donghun’s team must not have picked Yeo One’s team as the top tier, because on the mic, he says “I think we can easily beat you this time.” 

Yeo One has a sassy comeback, but… it doesn’t quite land. 

Junhyeok interviews, “I think we made a bad choice.”

They decide to have an emergency meeting at a… convenience store by the docks, I guess?

I mean, they might as well meet outside since apparently buildings aren’t heated in Korea.

Junhyeok says: “Since we established vocalist image that only does ballad….” And Yeo One chimes in: The performances we've shown could have been quite limited.” They’ve done a lot of emotional songs -- maybe it’s time to freshen things up.

They want to show a bright and fun side and decide to add a bit of movement. 

Yeo One is their performance expert, and he comes up with some basic semi-choreo for them to do. 

They have fun preparing. 

And then… it’s time to perform!

Full version without reactions 

My thoughts: 

Pleasant. 

I don’t know what else to say about it. Everyone did fine -- well, Junhyeok was pitchy on that first big high note -- but it’s like I was forgetting about the performance even while I was watching it. There are a lot of distinctive voices here, but this was just so… aggressively pleasant. 

I think this would have been a great song for a group to perform at the end of a long concert. You know, when they’ve built up a lot of good will throughout the night and everyone’s kind of emotionally spent and wants to have a sort of “credits role” moment as the encore. The group comes out wearing their tour-merch t-shirts and everyone sways. Great. I’m on board. But it’s just the wrong choice for the only song that you can sing. 

It’s weird because Junhyeok said he knew they’d made a bad choice, and they thought they could dress it up with a little bit of extremely lite choreo? I don’t get it. I think they didn’t understand the assignment the way that Jeup did. 

In the MNET edit, everyone likes the performance. 

Wendy does her best to smile with her new lips. 

The judges comment on how nice Yeo One sounds, and what a great voice Gwangseok has. 

Eunkwang has to exchange looks with Wendy and Jaehwan over Junhyeok’s sweet tone.

Everyone is a little surprised and pleased when things brighten up and they do that tiny bit of choreo (lining up and stepping away one at a time). Yeo One gets the audience to wave their arms in unison. 

We see Wendy a lot. She seems to be really enjoying it. 

When one of them say “BASU!” (clap), the audience does clap, but they can’t find the beat, and neither can the judges. Looks like many of the judges have their in-ear monitors out. 

When they’re done, the judges applaud, but Solar looks like she wants to wish herself into space.

Seohyung backstage says, “They tried to give the finale feel, like an encore,” and that’s true, they did, but it just sort of makes you nostalgic for the other performances from the night. 

Donghun, who had his filter shot off in the war, says, “They’re desperate. They’re all on the edge.”

The judges are voting…

… and they don’t look thrilled. 

The high score comes in, and it’s a 94. 

What in the fuckity fuck fuck.

Meanwhile, Jay’s team is just like…. 

I wish the judges could go back and just admit they were wrong about Jay’s team. Don’t any of them even take a moment to think, “Hey, I gave Drowning a 90 or less, do I really want to give this team a fucking 94?” But someone gave a fucking 94. Whatever.

Solar, on the other hand, isn’t super complimentary. She says: “The song itself was well suited for the finale. It’s a hopeful song, and you sang it very hopefully, but there was no narrative to the performance, so the hopeful message wasn’t really conveyed.” 

VCG says: “In terms of performances, some share the hope with the audience, while other asks them to witness the singers’ happiness. Your performance was the latter.” The on-screen caption says “It seemed like a performance for the four members, not for the audience to empathize.”  He isn’t thrilled with how they used Gwangseok (I think he thinks there wasn’t enough Gwangseok? There didn’t seem to be enough of anything or anyone!) and says “If you get another chance, show me something deep.”

Eunkwang, who gave the 94 -- and who I think might have been the only one who really liked the performance-- says, “I actually felt differently. That’s how diverse the audience’s ears are. During the entire performance, I felt cozy and overwhelmed. Like I was in the clouds.” He praises Gwangseok and the team as a whole. 

Well, that’s nice that they got some good feedback. I find Junhyeok a sort of touching figure somehow and wouldn’t want him to be completely bulldozed in this round. Life has bulldozed him enough! 

And that’s about it for this post. In the last one, I’ll cover the last 15 minutes of this episode, and do a general wrap up of this round of competition. 

It’s a gross stormy day where I live and I have a sad tummy, so what else am I going to do but surround myself with squishmallows and watch Korean tv shows? My Fella just made another pot of coffee for us, my afternoon appointments all canceled due to the storm, I’ve got my microwavable slippers on, so let’s do this. 

See you in the next one! And have a very Jeup day until then!

[oldfangirl81]

Okay, I saw this post a while ago about why do fic writers make the Buckley Parents be truly horrible people. Most often this shows up in writing them as racist, homophobic and physically abusive jackasses. Given I have a fic where I am making them truly horrible people this has been kicking around in my brain.

So beware my deep thoughts on this...

Okay, so first off I have some personal experiences that color my views. Some parental grandparents stuff I'm still working through. So I'm always going to lean towards found family if canon bio parents suck. So I'm already not inclined to write redemption/forgiveness towards shitty parents who haven't made an effort at change or did it for all the wrong reasons so it is temporary. (oh no my neighbors think I'm bad for not knowing what is happening in my adult child/grandchild lives I must pretend for a while.)

But generally speaking it can be hard to accept that basically okay humans make some very selfish choices that cause harm. It is easier to accept if we only highlight the bad in them. Or we use things our personal beliefs say are characteristics that only bad people have.

We know if we are writing any "realism" eventually Eddie & Buck are going to face homophobia. Yes, even in California. Southern California tends to vote more conservative but northern California has its jackasses too. I was called slurs when protesting Prop 8 by a minivan family. Now I'm lucky and the important people in my life didn't get flustered by me coming out as bi. But that is not always the case. Writing can definitely be a way to process that. Be it an actual experience or just the fear of coming out. So that can be a factor in people writing the Buckley Parents as homophobic jerks.

And often in reality if you find a homophobic/racist jerk then you've also found an ableist jerk. Now again my own personal experience with my grandparents ableism is clouding my judgement. They did and said horrible things when I was a kid. It is believable to me that the Buckleys might not be the greatest with Chris.

Now my grandparents also lost a child. Not as young as Daniel but it was before I was born. It was tragic and unexpected. But they never wanted/allowed my father to grieve beyond what they felt was appropriate. They had a distaste for therapy. It was for OTHER people, the ones with real problems. So I can see the Buckley Parents saying and doing shitty things around Postpartum and PTSD issues because I've known people whose own losses just made them jerks, even to those closest to them.

I also think a lot of us are just tired of shows pushing redemption arcs for shitty parents solely based on the fact they are the DNA donors. I've stopped watching shows when they lean too heavily on that for me. SWAT comes to mind as a more recentish one I stopped because of that. We want the characters to be validated that they don't have to accept shitty people in their life. Be it the mother who fakes her death to work with the CIA or the father who abandoned his family for another or the father who constantly kept his kids traveling to train to kill monsters or the parents who created a child solely to save their other child then never told him while treating him different his whole life. We want these characters to eventually get closure/revenge/peace that leads to love and happiness. Because maybe we know we'll never get that in reality or not as satisfyingly. (The closure/revenge part, hopefully we all find the love, happiness and peace part.) So writing the Buckleys getting verbally sliced up by Eddie is satisfying.

So I think there are a lot of complex reasons to write the Buckleys as extra shitty. But also it is easy to build an antagonist off a slightly established character.

Or maybe I just need therapy and I'm overthinking.

[ezralva]

Any 2×4 HCs?

Oh, I don't think I'm the right person for this, but I'll tryyy

Anw, whenever asked for HCs they turn into drabbles somewhat so it's under the cut cz it's long lol

HC 1

As far as Akai remembered, Shun had never called a girl ‘kawaii’. Not directly or behind them.

Shun hated that word with all his might.

But when the boys gathered together with nothing better to do, the topic usually changed to which newest idol girl or rookie actress is the cutest. All of them would then start shouting out why their biases were the cutest, except for Shun.

“C’mon, Shun-chan! You could at least pick one, vote for my girl!” Aoyama urged him to pick his imaginary girlfriend.

Shun looked at the picture of a row of cheerful-looking girls with fluffy uniforms and colorful ribbons decorating their heads, examining them carefully one by one.

“Hmm…they all look the same to me, so no one.” Shun just casually shrugged his shoulders.

“You’re kidding, right??” Kida grumbled, “They all are different people, famous idols!”

“But all their faces look similar to me. They all even wear the same outfits!”

“You must be blind, Shun-chan.”

“Then just name one person out there that you think befits the word ‘kawaii’. There’s gotta be someone! Even the little sister in your neighborhood is fine,” Akai said.

“Knowing Shun, he might say it’s his sister,” Aoyama piped in.

“Hmm, sis is always a lot older than me so I don’t think she’s cute. But my sis is pretty for sure!”

“Well, maybe not from a girl’s group, but a boy’s group? Apparently, kawaii boy is a trend nowadays,” Akai suggested.

“I don’t know any boys group, but if I had to choose one, then it’s him.” Shun laid out a picture from his smartphone, of a red-haired boy, looking like a middle schooler but curiously with piercings on his ears.

“Eh? I’ve never seen this idol before, who is he?” Aoyama asked.

“Oh! Maybe he used to be a child actor?” Kida blurted randomly.

“What? He’s no idol! He’s a part-timer from my sis’ café. And he’s my friend.”

“So…the only person you think is cute…is this friend of yours?”

“Yep, his name is Souma. He’s actually 2 years older than us, can you believe it? That makes him kawaii, right?”

Akai, Aoyama, and Kida just stared at each other, speechless.

Because that…just answered the long-time mystery of why Shun never called any girl ‘cute’.

HC 2

For materials of his new web-based short story, Motoharu once again surveyed the boys on what act or style or behavior they consider as ‘cool’ in men of all ages.

They were now at the café not long after the lunch rush-hour, when it closed for 3 hours to prepare for dinner.

“So from Hayate first, what is it?” Motoharu prodded.

The boy seemed to think hard on the topic. They waited for the whole 10 minutes in silence but no answer came out. Instead, the boy had started fidgeting in his seat and his face randomly went red out of the blue.

“Okay, understood.” Motoharu broke the silence and suddenly jotted something on his notes.

“Huh? But…I haven’t said anything?”

“For Hayate, everything Takayuki does and wears is the standard of cool men.”

“Whaa?! W-wait a min—” the poor boy stuttered, his blushes went all the way down to his neck.

“Next, Souma?”

“Igarashi-sense—”

“Hmm, since you mention Mima-san, I remember I’ve always thought that a guy is the coolest when they wear a suit. The complete 3-piece suit is even better!” Souma cut Hayate off.

“Ah, I think I get it.” Motoharu agreed. “We both don’t have many occasions to wear one, right?”

“Yeah! Also, I remember the 1st time I saw my bro wearing a suit, I just had to take his pics, I asked him to do this pose and that until he was late for his meeting, ahahahah-”

“That’s just cause you’re a brocon,” Shun grumbled audibly, looking very upset all of a sudden.

“Eh not just my brother, though. I agree with Hayate-kun, Mima-san has a good sense of fashion. Everything he wears looks good on him.”

“B-but I didn’t even say anything!” Hayate was flustered, looking around as if making sure that Mima was really not around.

“Maybe it’s because of his build, must be nice being that tall, right?” Souma added, ignoring Hayate.

“Okay, so for Souma, is the mature appeal, right? It’s a bonus point if they’re taller than average?”

“Yep!”

“And Shun?”

“Of course! Guys who play sports are the coolest!”

“Boo! That’s just like calling your own self ‘cool’, Shun-chan.” Souma gave him a tongue-out.

“I-I’m not! I think artists and creators like you, Souma, a-and Motoharu-san as well, are really cool and so is a brainy and quiet guy like Hayate-san, also a man that is good at his job like Mima-san is cool too!” Shun exclaimed in one breath.

“Aww, that’s so sweet of you, Shun.” Motoharu piped in.

“Aww, that’s so cute of you, Shun-chan.” Souma giggled.

“I ain’t cute!”

The next day, Mima who wasn’t present yesterday and hence didn’t know anything, suddenly got a call from Shun, asking him about his height when he was a 3rd year high-schooler and if he still grew some inches during Uni days…

***

“Of course you will, Shun-kun, you’re not even 20 yet, right?”

“Yeah…Mima-san, do you think I can even get taller than you?”

Eh? What gives…?

Mima was compelled to ask what brought this on but thought better and left him be. It must’ve been just another episode of Competitive Shun.

“Sure, I think you’ll surpass me in no time.”

It must’ve been the answer the boy was looking for, as his tone obviously cheered up after.

“Then, Mima-san, can you bring me along the next time you’ll go shopping for clothes? I’d like to buy clothes like the ones you're usually wearing.

".............."

HC 3

Despite the tradition, on Valentines, Souma always gives out ‘giri choco’ (friend chocolates) for Shun, Hayate, Mima, Motoharu. But it is only Shun whom he invited to his apartment for dinner where Souma would cook him all of his favorite dishes, from scratch.

Shun thinks that is because he’s special to Souma, that they are best friends.

Even though Shun is forever dense and can’t read between the lines, Souma is still happy to invite him every Valentine.

Because he knows how much Shun loves his cooking.

So he’s going to keep doing this until that boy comes around.

HC 4

The reason why Shun went into modeling in his Uni days started when Souma needed a model for one of his final projects which was portrait photography.

He asked Mima first of course, but the guy only had one facial expression for all poses on the camera...

He asked Hayate next… but for heaven’s sake, that boy could not follow any of the instructions without blushing too hard and grimacing. Though his candid pictures did come out splendidly, it’s not like he could submit portraits where the only model was always staring at nothing on the wall or looking out the window…

Motoharu couldn't take irrelevant gigs which require his face going public without breaching his company's contracts, as the novelist had become even more popular nowadays.

So Shun it was...

Which turned out for the best.

He came out of the project with A mark and a lot of offers for jobs, which extended to Shun being scouted as a model.

Shun magically no longer shut his eyes when being captured on camera. And that only happened when Souma was the one behind the camera.

Shun also got praised a lot for being a handsome model and even got an offer to be scouted as an actor. They all said, for amateurs, they both showed great chemistry onsite and did a really great job, as a pair.

After all, Souma’s teacher said that 'the camera is the window to the cameraman’s heart'.

For some reason I like them best during this pining phase! It just feels right for now with how oblivious these two kids are lol

[readwithmeeg]

7 Magical Fictitious Places I Wish I Could Visit

Have you ever had a world described to you so well that you wanted to dive into the pages and walk around right then and there. Me too, I think it’s something that every reader experiences at least one time in their lives. While it’s probably impossible to name all of them here is my list for the 7 fictional places id want to visit if they were real.

Gondor

Caraval

Hogwarts

Kings Landing

The Shire

Crescent City

Velaris

Gondor

Knowing me there had to be at least one Tolkien experience on this list. But Gondor is one of the first places I would want to visit if I got the chance to step into The Lord of the Rings. Not only is it a magnificent city carved in stone, but it seems like a place you could wander for hours and never get bored. There is just so much to see and experience that it has made it on to this list.

Caraval

This is a recent addition to my list, but Caraval seems like such a cool place to experience it had to be included. It’s a place full of mystery and magic and you never know if what you’re seeing is quite real or not adding even more to the experience. Caraval also changes regularly no experience is the same adding to the mystery and intrigue even more!

Hogwarts

I think anyone who has read or watched Harry Potter wants to visit Hogwarts and experience a sliver of what it’s like to go to that magical school wizard war or not. All the hidden rooms and crazy towers just make it seems like an amazing place and a must visit on my fantasy world tour. I’ve been to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter but I don’t think it’s quite the same. However, I think it’s as close as I’ll get to the real thing. 

Kings Landing

A bit of an unexpected on but Kings Landing from the Game of Thrones Series seemed like a cool place (pre-destruction). The crazy architecture and mystical gardens really drew me in especially after I saw it come to life in the show. I think it would be a cool vacation spot.

The Shire

I couldn’t pick just one Tolkien town… The shire is also high on my places to visit if I could. I’m a farm girl at heart so a nice trip to the countryside living in a little hole in the ground sounds great. It’s also a place that I think would have some pretty good food and drinks based on Bilbos birthday party and Mary and Pippin’s green dragon dance who wouldn’t want to visit. Did you know that you can visit the Hobbiton set in New Zealand? It’s on my bucket list check it out here and let me know would you want to visit?

Crescent City

This one is a little bit different it’s not a high fantasy medieval city. But Crescent City from Sarah. J. Maas’ series with the same name sounds like a cool place. It would be like living in New York but there’s also magic and monsters. The best of both worlds, right?! I think so… It would be even better id Bryce was my roommate so I could hang out with one of the coolest characters there is.

Velaris

Finally, the number one top place I would visit of I could. Velaris, the city of Starlight. Those 4 words hooked me the first time I read them, and it just kept getting better and better. Another Sarah. J. Maas world but I couldn’t help it she has built up this world so well and described it as such a magical and happy place how could I not want to visit.

I realize a lot of these places sound similar what can I say I have a type… dark and magical. If you couldn’t already tell I would recommend any of these stories in a heartbeat and if you want some other suggestions, be sure to check out my blog for more!

[zhongwans]

hi! i've seen you mentioned some criticism before the release of woh but i'm a relatively recent fan, if you don't mind could you explain what happened?

WOH's casting was not well received, basically.

People are always dissatisfied with castings tbh, but the reaction to WOH's was especially negative. Simply put, people thought the two of them were "too manly" to star in dangai. Because GJ and ZZH are "too manly", they must be "too straight", and because they're "too straight" it must mean that acting in a love story with another man would be too difficult for them. Based on that very flawed assumption, people believed they would be too awkward to act out a proper romance with each other and so their chemistry would be nonexistent.

People were especially dissatisfied with ZZH because his image was very stereotypically manly (this is a "problem" because Zhou Zishu is a shou/bottom), he's had at least two girlfriends before and he's known for not performing fanservice with his costars.

GJ has actually starred in a BL before (an actual one, not censored) but it wasn't aired in China, so people only knew him through his het dramas. Like ZZH, his appearance did not fit fans' image of the character he was casted as.

It's not that people were particularly angry (TYK is one of priest's older and less popular books, so it doesn't have a dedicated fandom that would care enough to get angry) it's just that people took one look at the casting and immediately thought "there's no way that's going to work" and promptly noped out.

The show had only one scriptwriter (in cdramas, it's common to have at least two or three working on one script together) and she was a newbie, on top of that. When leaks came out, people thought the costumes were ugly which further solidified the "this will definitely flop" opinion about the show. The low funding and lack of sponsors did not help improve the show's reputation. People saw the early leaks and promotional stuff and said that it looked like GJ and ZZH didn't get along and secretly hated each other.

Only eight or so fanstations were set up for WOH at that time, while the other productions had at least twenty. I think h/yx had around sixty? And in polls conducted on weibo, WOH was almost always voted as the least anticipated dangai drama and the most likely to fail. No one paid attention to it. It seemed pretty chill on the outside because nobody cared, but the situation within the fandom was...messy.

It's very, VERY lucky that no one cared about them, because there were quite a few bad incidents involving toxic solo fans during filming. Simply put, GJ and ZZH's solo fans thought that the two of them seemed way too close. There was a GJ fangroup that ended up disbanding because the fans running it were so pissed (one of them apparently came up to GJ and argued with him over ZZH). There was also the incident of ZZH's fans saying really horrible things to him on weibo because his studio uploaded pics of him with GJ (one "fan" told him to go see a psychiatrist) that he ended up arguing with them before eventually deleting his weibo app. I remember at that time being super thankful whenever I see h/yx trending on weibo, because that means all the attention was still on it and not at whatever tf was going on with GJ and ZZH. The lack of attention was a blessing.

Anyway, things worked out in the end. The script ended up being one of the best in recent years, everyone fawned over the quality of the costumes, and people were quick to change their minds about the casting once they started watching. The lack of sponsors meant there were less greedy businessmen dipping their slimy, uncultured fingers into the production (that's why a lot of high budget cdramas are shit) and the production team had complete control of the creative process. And of course, the funniest thing has to be that the actors that people thought secretly hated each other ended up being the only popular dangai actors so far to support and protect each other instead of competing for fans and money.

[alreadyblondenow]

One is a big number | Lee Taeyong

❤︎ Taeyong x female!reader ❤︎ Very fluffy, Smut, Smut, Tiny bit of angst, Highschool AU, Strangers to lovers, Love Alarm universe, Love Alarm au? ❤︎ 1/4 for LOVE MONTH SERIES: Boys Don’t Cry  One is a big number | You and your words | Sweet | He loves me, he loves me not |

Summary: Under the universe of Love Alarm, you rang Lee Taeyong’s Love Alarm loud and proud and you as a new girl at the school, has his attention more than anything else. 

Word count: 7,682k

Warnings: Protected sex, loss of virginity, touching, teasing, making out, corruption, goodbye innocence, mentions of first base to home run, taeyong having a boner while kissing, all that high school exploring in bed while Taeyong’s parents are not home, Trusting an app regarding love, swearing, mentions of alcohol, mentions of other idols

A/N: PURE FICTION. PURE FICTION. PURE FICTION. This will be very fluffy because I wanted to start February on a light note. hehe. Also, this is inspired by First Love by NCT 127 under Loveholic’s single. It’s a good thing that I finished this before they announced that First Love is all about your first... love... hahaha so I had time to incorporate in more with my fic. As always, I enjoy writing for my Bubu. Happy reading! 

For NCT-WRITER’S FEBRUARY EVENT, LOVE ALARM @nct-writers​ 

Can you still remember your first love? The day you met and the day you realized you officially like that person? 

When that one person hold your hand for the first time? Did he kept you close and kept you warm? 

When that one person kissed you for the first time? How did it feel?

When you had your first fight, how did you fixed it? 

Do you remember the time when you realized that, that one person is slowly slipping into your hands?

When that one specific person broke your heart? 

Do you remember it?

It’s been over four years since Love Alarm has been launched and they’ve been using it for almost everything. The world seemed to have progressed a lot now that we have Love Alarm in our phones but did it really made our lives easier? Especially when it comes to love? 

Walking to school on a beautiful day, your first day as a transferee... what could possibly go wrong? As you enter the school premises, you see students holding their phones like they’re waiting for something or someone. Perhaps they’re waiting for someone to ring their Love Alarm? Who knows? 

“He’s here!” A rather excited student exclaimed and brought out her phone and grabbed her friend. You being the only clueless student right now turned your back too to see the man they’ve been waiting for.

He was like a celebrity when he stepped on the first few steps upon the school’s entrance. Lee Taeyong, a senior. Very good looking, smart, athletic, and voted junior prom king. He literally looks like an angel walking in the middle of the school’s entrance together with his friends who look liked angels too. Their Love Alarm rang so much as they walk in front of the new and old students, making fun of each other and having a bet on whose Love Alarm will ring the most. 

You looked at him. You looked at his face like you don’t already know that it’s impolite to stare at someone, but you still did because Lee Taeyong is handsome. And you’re not immune to his charms. What a good way to start school, you thought. It’s only the first day but you feel like you’re going to have a blast as long as you see Lee Taeyong around. 

From there on Lee Taeyong has become your crush and your heart thumps so hard whenever you ring his Love Alarm every morning like the other girls. For you, there’s no shame in ringing his Love Alarm, you’re glad it does that. At least you’re being honest to him in silence and let the alert from Love Alarm do the talking. But even though you ring his Love Alarm again and again and again, you never wish for him to ring your Love Alarm back, no. He deserves someone perfect like him. 

Day by day and whenever you see him around, you look at him to feed your heart and eyes then look away again and ignore him as if you didn’t ring his Love Alarm loud and proud. It frustrates him you know, but in a good way. He now recognizes you as the new girl who rings his Love Alarm every day but seems to don’t care about him enough. In other words, you’re not like the other girls. 

You know that good feeling when you go to school and you’re looking forward to seeing your crush even just for a few seconds? That’s what Lee Taeyong feels for you. With just a couple of weeks of ringing his Love Alarm, you had the man thinking about you and wanting to know you. Sometimes he can’t understand Love Alarm. He is completely sure that he likes you already and he is very interested in you, but he can’t ring your alarm. 

Have you ever had that good feeling when your crush is around and you are free to look at him no matter how long you want and whenever he caught you staring you just avoid his eyes? It’s like playing chicken but you’re both enjoying the game, he smiles at you and brings up his phone as if he’s telling you ‘Thank you for ringing my Love Alarm again’ and you just smile at him, completely clueless that he’s starting to flirt. 

“Why don’t you just ring her Love Alarm back?” Doyoung asked. 

“Cant. For some twisted reason, I can’t ring her Love Alarm. That’s why I can’t make a move and can only flirt back, I want to trust Love Alarm” Taeyong says, eyes completely glued to you but you don’t know that because you’re busy reading.

“Maybe you don’t really like the girl?” Doyoung blurted out. Lee Taeyong didn’t really want to admit it with his friend but maybe he’s right.

“The Lee Taeyong flirts back now huh? And to a new girl? Interesting” Johnny swings his arm to his friend and ruffles his hair. Teasing him for flirting back at you because he saw Taeyong smiled in your direction. 

“Am I not allowed to flirt?” Taeyong snorted and turned off his Love Alarm when he saw the place getting crowded already. “It’s senior year, I need to change” he added. 

“So changing your relationship status is a good start? Hmm. Okay, I agree with you on that. But don’t waste your time if you're unsure,” Johnny explains. But Lee Taeyong doesn’t care, he looks at you as you gather your books thinking of many ways to start talking to you and secretly wishing he can ring your Love Alarm back. But for now, he just can’t. 

While you were studying at the library, you can’t help but remember how Lee Taeyong thanked you for ringing his alarm.... he fucking thanked you, that must be something? He isn’t thanking every single person who rings his alarm, just you. You smile at that thought which you think is crazy but a girl can dream. Then again you remember that you’re studying and shook your head for the nth time to stop yourself from thinking about your senior. 

When you finally focused on studying and finished tons of school work, you didn’t notice that it’s already dark outside and that going home alone would be scary but you have no choice. You walk and walk and walk until you finally reached that scary alleyway you’ve been trying to avoid but it’s your only way home. 

“Hey- don’t go there” 

A familiar voice warned you before you can even start walking, you turned around and wish that you were wrong but you weren’t. It is as if the world heard you thinking about Lee Taeyong and the universe made you meet in an unexpected way. “It’s dangerous there, where are your friends? Is that your way home?” He asked the question like you two were close and talking already, his face looked cold but funny how he makes you feel warm. 

“Yes, this is the only way. Usually, I go home when the sun is still up but I have to study” you explain. 

“I have no choice then. Let me walk you home, my conscience will not let me sleep if I just let you-“

“I can take care of myself, I can easily call my dad. If I refuse your offer, will you still think about me?” You don’t know where the sudden bravery came from but you’re glad you did it.

He was completely shy, blushing and keeping his head down. And that’s the push that Lee Taeyong needed. He held out his hand and introduced himself properly like a decent person would and you did the same. Both hands are shaking because of nervousness but that’s understandable you both thought. “This isn’t how I imagined meeting you officially-“ 

“So you do think about me?” You further tease the blushing man and finally admits the truth and said, “Yes. I do think about you. A lot” it was silent for a few seconds before he started again, “I wish I could ring your Love Alarm too, you make me nervous you know that? Whenever I’m in school I look forward to seeing you, even just for a few seconds” he came closer to you as you grip your bag tightly and the butterflies in your stomach won’t stop flapping their wings when Lee Taeyong put strands of hair behind your ear so he could see you clearly under the lamppost light. 

Either way, you still let him walk you home and cherish every second you could have with your crush. You feel like you’ve won something like you’re winning this nonexistent race with the other girls, you feel happy for yourself. He told you about his day, you told him yours, he made you laugh, you make him shy for no reason. And when you and Taeyong finally reached your house, you exchanged numbers. Now you can tell that you’re winning something. His attention and interest.

“I hope I can ring your Love Alarm,” he says again, looking at you like it’s going to be the last thing he’ll do. 

“That’s fine, ring mine when you’re ready. We can’t rush romance, even when Love Alarm is involved” you watch him let out a small laugh and you think he’s so handsome even when he’s cute. 

“Usually girls get offended when someone they like can’t ring their Love Alarm, but you... you don’t mind waiting” 

You didn’t want to end the moment yet but it’s getting pretty late and he needs to go home too, you told him to stop flirting and go home safe so he can flirt with you some other time. And for the last time, just to wrap this wonderful night, he tilts his head and smiled so sweetly to you and told you ‘good night’ 

That moment you had with Lee Taeyong felt like a pretty damn good song but just like every song, it needed to end. But you will never forget about it. 

After that momentous night with your crush, Lee Taeyong has become a whole entire playlist and a well written album wrapped into one. Every love song you listen to was suddenly all about him he and the man was head over heels to you. He was texting you nonstop even during class, calling you after school and will probably end later at night, and getting the tiniest chance to flirt with you in the morning before you both head to class and meet again by golden hour to walk home together.

Not long after a week of flirting and getting to know each other more, he finally rang your alarm in front of many students in school accidentally. Your eyes went big and Taeyong was as shocked as you are. It was like you have this 10-meter radius for yourselves only and you were both giggling when your Love Alarms went off together. It was a happy moment, definitely one for the books. “Finally” he whispers, standing close to you, not caring if a lot of people are watching. Let them watch, Lee Taeyong thought. So they know you belong to each other now and you have Love Alarm on your side. 

“Are you free this weekend?” He asks while walking you home. 

“Free, but I have to study. What do you have in mind?” you answered as calmly as you could because you have a hunch that he’s going to ask you on a date. 

“Well, now that I can finally ring your Love Alarm, I want to take you out on a proper date” you knew it, “movies?” 

“Sounds fun, as long as it’s scary” he nods and took his phone out of his pocket. 

“Can I ring your Love Alarm again?” He requests which you gladly gave in and opened the app. You two waited for a few seconds for Love Alarm to work its magic. 

Waiting

Waiting 

Waiting

Until the number ‘1’ appeared on your screens and says “Someone within 10-meter radius loves you”. Taeyong sighed in relief and swing his arms around you for a hug and a kiss on the forehead. “That scared me” he admitted. 

Unconsciously, he doesn’t know what his hug and kiss can do to you. While his heart calms as he hugs you, yours is beating so fast like you just ran a mile. There’s that winning feeling again. 

On your first date, he took you to the movies and as promised the movie was scary. It was so scary that he had enough opportunity to hold you close and hold your hand the whole time. The moment your fingers intertwined, you felt some kind of electricity flowing in your body and the movie house suddenly felt warm. “I know, I felt it too” he whispers and went back to watching the movie. 

The next few days with Taeyong was something you’ve never imagine that will happen in your high school life. He has become the epitome of new things and first times. 

He is the first guy to hold your hand in public. Swinging it high, up and down, holding it tight, and he even kisses it whenever he feels like it. Not a day goes by that he didn’t hold your hand or kept you close to him ever since you made it official through Love Alarm. 

He is the first guy to sweep you off your feet, through his sweet words and gentleman gestures. “Can I flirt with you later?” he asks, putting a bottle of juice in front of you before he goes to his next class. ‘Flirt with you’ simply means he wanted to spend time with you before he walks you home. 

Still in your school uniforms, Taeyong brought you somewhere quiet where the river is calm, and just looking at it makes you calm your nerves too. “The sun feels nice, let’s watch the sun go down,” he says lying comfortably on the ground and enjoying the warm grass underneath his body. 

“How’s your day?” you sat beside him and Taeyong was quick to cover your legs with his school coat. He grunted while covering your legs as he remembers how stressful being a senior is. 

“Was having a bad day, when I talked to you earlier. School has been kicking my butt” he says and lies again beside you. “How about you? How's being a new student so far?” 

“So far so good, I have a handsome senior who just made my high school life more interesting” 

He handsomely giggles in front of you, so close that your lips are just inches away. “You’re flirting,” he says. 

“You said you wanted to flirt with me?” you bite back. 

“Mmm-hmm. Can I flirt a little differently today?” he came even much closer to you but you didn’t pull away because you know exactly what he’s talking about. 

And just as you expected, he kissed you. Softly. Holding your chin as he moves his lips on yours while the sun goes down. Your eyes were shut and all you did the whole time your boyfriend was kissing you is return the kiss and savor the feeling of being kissed for the first time. 

When the kiss was over, he did not pull away immediately but looked at your lips for a few seconds as if he wanted to kiss it again but even more fiercely this time but he knew this is not the right time for that. So instead, he kissed your nose and your forehead and flashed a sweet smile at you. Something that you will never forget like the kiss you just shared a few seconds ago.   

After that day, kissing became an everyday habit to you and Taeyong and you both love it whenever you get the chance to share a kiss privately. Well, he does kiss you in public, but those are nothing compared to the ones you share inside his room after school and his parents are not yet home. Lee Taeyong’s lips are simply addicting but little did you know that your boyfriend is even more addicted to kissing you. 

“Just one more kiss” he pulls you close to him begging for another kiss before he watches you go inside your house. “One more please” he pouted like the baby that he is. 

You crashed your lips on him and feel both of his hands hold the sides of your head so you won’t pull away from him so easily. But when you do, he simply asks for another kiss and then another other, until you’re basically making out in front of your house. 

“Mmm” he moans like he’s not planning to stop kissing you soon. 

“Tae-“ you giggle and tried pushing away and finally, he stopped. Lips swollen, slightly panting with a…. hard cock. 

“Sorry about that. I- I have no control over that, I’m sorry” he apologizes and tries to hide his boner. You let out a small laugh and fixed his ruined hair with a few pat. 

“You don’t have to be shy, I’m your girlfriend. See you tomorrow, okay? Go home safe!” you slowly walk towards your house, waving your hand goodbye until you see him walk away. 

Just like any new couple, you and Taeyong crave for each other in many ways. After exploring enough with kissing and teasing each other whenever one of you gets too turned on, soon you talk about different levels of physical intimacy freely without being awkward. 

Given that Taeyong is more experienced than you are because you’re a virgin, he knew exactly what to do when it comes to expressing his physical needs to you and making sure that he doesn’t pressure you with anything. 

“So how do I know if what base are we on?” you asked innocently. 

“First base is kissing. Open mouthed kisses, tongue- basically, the things I already did to you or the things we did already” he explains, hands on your waist as you both lie on your sides facing each other. 

“I’m guessing we're way past first base then” you smirked and made him shy. 

“Yeah. Way past first base” he smirked back at you and hovers on top of you. “The second base is more on touching” he emphasized the word ‘touching’ and better explain it by moving his hand from your leg up until he reaches your inner thighs under your school skirt and run up a finger on your slit unexpectedly which made you curl in no time and curse at him. Not because you didn’t like it, but because it felt good and he immediately stopped the teasing. 

You glared at him as if you’re telling him through your eyes to touch you again, be he just snorted and kissed your cheeks. “Don’t hate me. I’m just waiting for the perfect timing” he explains and enjoys how you’re so annoyed but horny.

You let out a sharp sigh and made him continue again. “Third base is giving head or fingering. Oh, you’re going to love third base” he teased you further by just using his words. You pushed him away from you playfully but your boyfriend is strong and caught your hands, “okay okay. Enough teasing, home run is having sex. And come on I have to get you home before I could no longer stop myself” 

He’s not lying because you see the growing tent in his crotch. He’s been stopping himself by teasing you. You sat up when he got out of his bed to change into some much comfortable clothes but when he got back, you teased him by putting on a show. Lifting your skirt slowly just before you reveal your panties and as expected, he stopped you. 

“Don’t tease me, I don’t have a condom right now” it was a warning but it sounded more like he’s begging. 

“I’m just joking” you kissed him on the cheek and got up from your comfortable position to fix your wrinkled school uniform before you head home.   

Tonight, you attend a party with Taeyong for the first time and his Love Alarm kept on ringing the moment he stepped into the room. 

Every day, Lee Taeyong rings your Love Alarm and you ring his too.... together with the other girls and quite frankly, you don’t know how long you can stand those girls who fantasize about fucking your boyfriend. He’s your own private buffet, for goodness sake. 

“Don’t drink anything unless I’m the one who gave it to you, okay? I’ll get you something- Doyoung!” he made sure you won’t be alone and called his friend before he leaves. 

“So you’re the lucky girl. Hi, I’m Johnny” he offers you his hand for a handshake and accepted with a smile. 

“Don’t mind Johnny, hi I’m Doyoung. Taeyong’s best friend,” you shake his hand and smiled at them, hoping that you don’t look awkward. They made small talk, asked you how you’ve been and how’s your Junior year going so far which you answered too seriously. Soon, you feel Taeyong’s cold hands on your shoulders and hands you a drink before he shoos his drunk friend Johnny away. 

It was a fun night, but it can be better if the other girls can respect your relationship. You wanted to snap so hard but instead, you focused on how Taeyong kisses your nape, shamelessly while you watch his friends play beer pong and he’s standing right behind you, hands on the front pockets of your jeans like he’s telling those girls he belongs to you. 

But the warm feeling was shortly cut off when they heard Johnny shouting and drunkenly pushing himself to walk straight so he could get a hold of his girlfriend. Everyone heard it. The words, “Johnny were through. I’m breaking up with you” were heard on every corner of the place even under loud party music. 

After hearing those words, you looked at Taeyong like you’re telling him through his eyes that you’re scared. But Taeyong and his other friends were quick to get Johnny and stopped him from making a scene. 

Everything happened so fast. One second Taeyong was beside you, but now you're in the middle of the place alone and watching your boyfriend and his friends carry Johnny outside. 

“Johnny didn’t ring her love alarm today,” Taeyong sits beside you after leaving you alone for a few minutes to talk to his friend. “And if he’s going to be honest he fell out of love. But he wasn’t ready to let her go and wasn’t sure about his feelings, he’s just being paranoid because he’s going to graduate soon” he let out a sharp exhale before he continues, “We're going to graduate soon. I guess Love Alarm caught him having second thoughts for her already” 

“Do you want to leave now?” you asked your boyfriend. He can only nod because he still feels weak about what happened to his friend. 

 The supposedly warm night with Taeyong became cold and quiet. Not because there’s something wrong with your relationship. But because you were both scared of the idea of breaking up. He wanted to tell you he saw the look in your eyes when you heard the words but he figured enough sadness for one night, wrapped his arms around you and told you “I will never let you go” and kissed you on your temple. 

Few days after the party is exams week so you and Taeyong didn’t see each other that much. But by the time it’s over, he waited for you outside the school and you know he’s the one waiting for you because he rang your Love Alarm. 

While walking to his house, it suddenly rained so hard that the raindrops hurt your skin. But instead of avoiding the rain, Taeyong pulled you in the middle of an empty street and kissed you under the rain. 

It was so sweet. 

His arms were perfectly wrapped around your body while yours is placed behind his lower back. You tiptoe unconsciously so you could reach him well. “I love you,” he says and lifted you off the ground effortlessly for a tight hug. 

“Here wear this” He left some clean clothes on his bed for you to change with while he puts your wet uniform on the dry cleaner. 

When you’re finally dry and clean, you cuddle with Taeyong in his bed wearing his big clothes and listening to the sound of rain with no lights on, but the gloomy sky outside. 

“I saw the way you looked at me the other night” he started. And you tighten your embrace to him as you remember the words and the whole scenario. 

 “I'm just scared and not because I’m doubting your love” you admitted. “I never thought about it you know. That things can go wrong someday-“

“No, no. Then I’ll love you, even more, every day. Don’t be scared please, trust my love” he says and kept you close by putting his legs on your thigh. His big hand is placed under your shirt, drawing small circles on your tummy to give you more comfort. 

“I’m guessing this is second base then?” you teased him to change the mood. 

“Do you want to proceed to that level? Hmm?” he rolls on top of you, teased you, and kissed your neck in a way that seriously turned you on in no time. 

“If you’re brave enough to do it, then go right ahead. I give you my full consent” you reached for his lips and kissed him deeply. You felt him smile during the kiss and also felt his hand slowly lifting your shirt or rather his shirt. Hands roaming your body like he never touched you before, squeezing your butt cheeks and kneading your clothed boobs. To be honest, he’s shy to put his hand inside your clothes but to his shock, you put yours inside his, bravely touched his body, and shamelessly put your hand inside his sweatpants and touched him. 

That made him swallowed his shyness and knead your unclothed breast under the shirt that you’re wearing. Brushing his fingers on your nipples softly, pinching them to make giggle. 

After a few minutes of intense touching, he was slightly tugging the sweat pants that you’re wearing and asked you, “Do I still have your consent if we proceed on third base?” He whispers oh so sexily beside your ear which made you remember what he told you, ‘you’re going to love third base’ and that is enough for you to nod and give him further permission. 

He kissed you on the lips, his way of saying ‘thanks’, and proceeds to lift your shirt and suck your nipples which made you moan his name and grip his locks so tight that he needed to reach for your hands and intertwine them with his. 

Lee Taeyong showed you who is in bed and you can't help but think that you’re the luckiest girl on Earth. 

“Hey, you okay? You’re spacing out, I think should-“ 

“Don’t stop” you moaned and grabbed his head for a deep kiss. You reach for his hand and made him knead your boobs while you kiss and grind on each other and in a matter of minutes you felt him putting his hand inside your panties while he distracts you with the way he kisses you. He flicks his fingers once and you curled immediately, legs wide open so he could freely move his hand. But soon his patience went thin and removed your panties, throwing it on the side of the bed before spreading your legs even more wider. 

“Do you like this side of me?” He whispers on the shell of your ear and bit it eventually making you tickle and giggle with parted lips. 

“I definitely do” you moan out. 

And for the main event under third base, he kissed your body all the way down until he meets your wet entrance. Kissing your inner thighs first before he proceeds to drive you wild with his tongue. 

First, he parted your wet folds, looked you straight in the eye, and licked you like you’re his favorite flavored ice cream. “Tae-“ is all you can moan out and decided to put your hands above your head and grab hold of his headboard. Which he didn’t like so he stopped and told you, “touch me, I like that” 

And so you did. Gripping Taeyong’s locks as he makes you feel good with his tongue. Putting a finger inside your cunt and flick his tongue faster together with his finger, making you cum in no time and crushing your boyfriend’s head with your legs. “Stop- stop” you cry out because of over sensitivity. “You weren’t going to stop eating me unless I told you so” 

He smirked and hummed because you’re right. He gave you a few minutes to catch your breath, taking that time to strip himself naked without you noticing. And when you finally came back from your high, he kisses your lower stomach and there you see your boyfriend all naked and really horny. 

“I want to have sex,” he shamelessly told you, touching your body with care while he waits for your answer. “Can we have sex?” he kisses you more like he’s persuading you. 

“Do you finally have a condom?” You asked with a smile. 

He did not waste any time and get the condom from his drawer, putting it on in front of you. Putting it on in between your wide open legs and very wet slit. 

“Put your arms around me,” he said and you followed immediately. He ran his protected cock on your wet slit, just to make him hard even more but the feeling for you is very different. You are very much aroused, very horny and it already felt good. So when you feel him poke your tight hole and slowly push in finally, your eyes shut close and feel every inch of Lee Taeyong’s cock go inside you oh so fucking slowly until he’s entire inside. 

He grunted and moan directly on your ear and told you, “virgin no more” and kissed you on your temple before he rolls his deep which made you both crazy and even more horny for each other. 

Your tight walls were so wet because of the foreplay that his cock was sliding in smoothly, hurting you good and stretching you right before he fucks you harder. 

“Fucking thin condoms, I feel like I’m fucking you raw,” he said in between thrust and rolling his tongue on your nipple, tugging and biting it as he pleases. 

When he sees you smiling through the pleasure and felt your body more relaxed, he put his mouth on your mouth and made you catch his moans as he fucks you harder and faster, enough for his bed to creak, your body to be dragged on the mattress and your nails to dig on his skin. 

He came hard and had a great orgasm, slowly thrusting deeper as he rides his high and showers you with kisses. Truth be told, he didn’t want to cum just yet but your tight walls did its magic on him.

The moment he pulls out to discard the condom, he went back to kissing your weak body and told you to “Calm down,” oh so sweetly, and eventually giggled when he saw you still breathing heavily.

“How can I calm down if you’re kissing me like that?” 

“Okay I’ll stop,” he says and pulled down your shirt to cover your exposed body, reached for your panties, and helped you wear them again then covered you with his thick sheets. “Better?” 

“Yes, thank you” you smiled weakly at him and watched him get dress again before he joins you under the covers.

“What are you thinking?” he asked, hoping that you’re okay. “Are you hurt somewhere?” 

“How many girls did you bring here before me?” You watch your boyfriend’s eyes get big upon hearing your question, “I’m joking. And no, nothing hurts. I’m just processing everything that happened. How about you? What are you thinking?” 

“I’m thinking about you, how I want you to be the last girl I have sex with in this bed” it was a joke because he only brought a total of two girls into his room. His first girlfriend and you. 

“Buy a new bed or I’m breaking up with you,” you said with a straight face but he clearly knew you’re joking. 

They say that being close with your partner emotionally, physically, and even sexually can strengthen a relationship. And right now, as you celebrate seven months of being in a relationship with Taeyong, you believe in that saying because you’ve been closer than ever after being intimate for the first time. In other words, the sex was a good way to strengthen your relationship. 

“Why do you love reading so much?” he asks, totally jealous over reading a good book rather than talking to him. 

Taeyong is busy nowadays because he’s graduating in a few weeks and he’s part of the prom committee because he has seriously good leadership skills. That’s why maybe he wanted more attention.

“Oh! I'm gonna miss you when you graduate” you pinch his cheek and sat closer to him. “Will you be fine being away from me?” You teased him but your question was serious. 

“No, I will not be fine. I will miss you every day- can we please talk about something else before I start crying?” he attacked you with kisses on the cheek but the moment was cut off when Johnny pullovers to fetch your boyfriend. 

“Have fun shopping for prom decorations with the boys rather than being in bed with me” you whisper to him while you both wear your bags and walk towards Johnny’s car. 

“I love you, go home safe, okay? I’ll call you as soon as we're done” 

During your walk alone, it felt nice to do something without Taeyong for once. Not that you wanted him to be gone, no. It’s just that nowadays, things have been becoming like a routine and less of a relationship. You go to school, see him before class starts, see him again after school, and go home together. Then you do it again the next day. Like you don’t have any more doors to unlock in this relationship. 

But what do you expect? You’re high school students. 

“Are you done studying?” 

“I can’t study tonight, my brain feels tired” you whine through the phone, eyes closed and thankful that it’s going to be the weekend tomorrow. “How about you?” 

“Well, Johnny accidentally broke a few lights so we need to fix it before we go home. I’m tired, I miss you” 

“Mmm. I’m tired too...” your voice was a little groggy. 

“And? Do you miss me too? Can I see you tomorrow?” 

“Tae, we just saw each other five hours ago and no, I want to enjoy my weekend by staying home and watching Netflix” 

“So you’re not having fun when we're out together?-“ 

“I never said anything like that” you opened your eyes because the conversation is getting pretty serious, “Don’t be angry, I just want some time for myself you know? We see each other every day, talk through text every hour, it’s like there’s no more room to breathe” you wish you can properly tell him what you’re feeling but those are the words that came out from your mouth. 

“Time for yourself, huh. Okay” and just like that, he ended the call. No ‘good night’ or ‘i love you’. And even though you’re sleepy and things escalated quickly, you heard the tone of his voice like a mixture of, annoyed and hurt. 

Instead of having a good night's sleep, you stayed up all night thinking about what you said to your boyfriend. Analyzing every word and repeating the scenario in your head, over and over again. If telling him what you want was wrong, then you don’t know what’s right anymore. 

On the next day, you sent him a few messages telling him that you’re sorry and that you didn’t mean to put it that way. You even told him you wanted to see him, hoping that he will finally get back to your messages. But still, he never replied. The whole weekend.  

Come Monday, you didn’t get to see Taeyong in the morning like you usually would because you and your friends did your group project together last minute. And the truth is, you’re starting to hurt because you feel bad for being honest even though you didn’t intend to hurt him like that. 

“I think you’re being too clingy” Doyoung protest to his friend during lunchtime.

“Girls love clingy boyfriends-“ 

“Well, unfortunately not your girlfriend. Give her some space, don’t make her all about you, you know?” 

“I just want every time I could get with her before I graduate. B-but, yeah. Now I’m giving her the time that she wanted for herself-“

“But you’re hurting her. She’s worried, she just wanted you to return her messages dude” Johnny pats his back and gave him the look like he’s saying ‘fix this before Love Alarm screw the situation further’ 

And while Taeyong is enjoying his lunch with his friends, you’re with your friends at the school bleachers watching the other sections use the field. Talking about hot boys, prom dresses, and what to do after prom.

“Did Taeyong asked you to prom already? Was it romantic?” you see the excitement of your friend as she asked you the question and see the others wait for your answer. 

“N-no. He hasn’t” the once cheerful faces were replaced by disappointment. Come to think of it, maybe he will not ask you to prom because of this stupid fight. You shook your head and returned the question to them and pretended that you care who’s taking them. But deep inside you envy them. 

School was always exhausted and you don’t know why you’re suddenly tired. Usually, after school and you meet Taeyong outside, you still have a lot of energy left. And maybe that’s it, Taeyong’s cheerful energy and happy aura are the ones recharging you after a day in school. That’s when you realized that you don’t need to push him away just so you can breathe.

Speaking of the devil, you see him leaning on Johnny’s car the moment you stepped out of the school grounds. Head down, hands inside his pockets, and waiting for you. 

The moment you stepped inside that 10-meter radius, his Love Alarm rang and he knew it was you. But the problem is, your Love Alarm didn’t ring this time. 

Taeyong didn’t notice it. Taeyong didn’t notice that your Love Alarm was silent. He still welcomed you with a tight hug, kissed your face one too many times, and said his sorry sincerely. It felt nice that you are now okay, he’s talking to you again and on top of that he apologized. Of course, you didn’t want to ruin that peace anymore and pretended that you’re not hurt.   

Few days went by and Taeyong hasn’t rung your Love Alarm and he’s too busy to notice it. Senior year is making him busy and you have nothing against that. Yes, you do miss him but he calls you before you sleep and quickly apologizes whenever he feels like he’s being a clingy boyfriend again. 

“N-no. Please, be clingy. I’m sorry for that night, I don’t know what I’m thinking” you sounded desperate but he doesn’t know why. 

“Okay, just making sure we don’t fight again” 

And few days before prom, he still hasn’t asked you yet while your friends all have dresses already and plans for that night. It sucks, but you don’t want to get mad at Taeyong for not asking you to prom because he’s busy. 

On a quiet afternoon after school, you’re waiting for Taeyong outside the school while reading a book, and page by page you digest every word just so you could stop thinking about prom. And just as you least expected it, your boyfriend asked you to prom on page 127 of the book that you’re reading. 

 “Will you go to prom with me?” -T.Y 

Then it hit you. You started reading this book on the day prom was announced so basically he asked you ever since day 1 and he has been waiting for your answer for weeks already. He just keeps on giving you more reasons to ring his Love Alarm loud proud, while you give him nothing to make him ring yours.  

“Finally. Hi” 

You didn’t know he was right behind you and his kiss brought you back on Earth. He was smiling handsomely and proud because his surprise worked on you, even though it took you a while to answer his question your reaction was worth it. 

“You know my answer Tae. And to be honest I thought you forgot about asking me” you finally admitted, but your lack of faith in him didn’t hurt him one bit. 

“Perfectly fine,” his arms swing around your waist and pulled you closer to him while you're sitting on the bench. “I’m free now and I don’t have prom committee duties. Can I flirt with you tonight?” the way he said it sounded just like old times, like the days when you were just starting as a couple. 

The flirting was continued in his room of course, with his thick curtains down, Netflix playing and hands intertwined the whole time. And after the movie, you two cuddled in bed with you on top of him and just listening to his heartbeat. 

“Does your heart beats for me?” you asked soft, hoping he would tell you the truth. 

“Of course, you’re my first love” true. Even though you’re not his first girlfriend, you’re the first girl he ever loved. 

“Your Love Alarm says otherwise Tae. I think I’m not giving you enough reasons to love me” you admitted. “You haven’t rung my alarm ever since our first fight” 

“W-what? Maybe it’s off?” He was panicking, shaking because maybe it’s true. With quick movements, he left you on his bed to get his phone then looked for your phone in your bag and opened the app to see if what you’re saying is true. 

His rang, of course, but yours didn’t. 

“Tae it’s okay- It doesn’t matter. You know you proved to me that you love me even if you can’t ring my Love Alarm” you went beside him and hugged him from behind. Feeling his frustration and anger to himself but your hug helps him a lot. “You tell and show me you love me every day. I can feel it in how you kiss me, how you treat me with respect and how you’re always patient with me. Come on it’s okay, don’t ruin your day” 

To make him feel better, you talked him out of his sulking and convinced him to go back to bed with you which eventually worked. You’re now sitting on top of him, grinding on his crotch, only wearing your panties and his hoodie. You can tell by the way he kisses you that he’s more than sorry about not ringing your Love Alarm and that makes your heart sad too because he didn’t do anything wrong.

“Let’s turn this night around,” you said before removing the hoodie that you’re wearing and making your boyfriend grip your boobs and play with your nipples while you kiss him and distract him as you undo his pants. 

“Clever” and finally he smiles and puts one of your nipples in his mouth, hands inside your panties and spreading your ass cheeks before he inserts a finger in your wet slit. 

After that night, Taeyong had a hard timing accepting that he can’t ring your Love Alarm again even though you told him so many times that it’s okay. Sometimes your conversation escalates too soon and he just ends up arguing with you. Soon fighting has become a weekly thing for the two of you whenever he brings up Love Alarm again. But that’s okay, couples fight and that’s normal. 

On prom night, you purposely did not bring your phone so Taeyong will not try to make your Love Alarm ring. It’s going to be a beautiful night and you didn’t want to ruin it for him. You danced with your boyfriend and went crazy with him on the dance floor, you dance with your friends and ate good food. In other words, you had a great time. 

And when the slow song started to play, everyone’s Love Alarm kept on ringing and people started to confess their feelings. It was amusing to watch and of course, you’re happy for them. But amidst that busy dance floor, that busy place, you and Taeyong had your own 10-meter radius and you don’t need Love Alarm to feel that you love each other. 

“I’m sorry for giving you a hard time these past few days” he started, swaying you under slow music and not caring what's happening around you even though people are very loud and excited. “Let’s stop using Love Alarm. That app lies. I know all too well that I love you and even though I can’t ring your Love Alarm, I sure know how to love you” 

“Mhmm. You do” oh you wanted to kiss him so badly but the teachers are looking. 

“You still love me right?” 

“Of course Taeyong. What kind of question is that?” 

“I know, I just want to hear you say it” he came closer to you and kissed you on your temple when the teachers looked away, “You look beautiful tonight” he added and dance with you more, looking straight into your eyes and thanking you secretly for liking him first. 

Now it's his turn to like and love you forevermore. 

[tanadrin]

why do most americans watch and praise media like Star Wars or The Karate Kid, which endorses the idea of the "underdog that wins against all odds", but refuses to help the *real* underdogs in our political system? if any of the people who saw Star Wars took it's message to heart, they would start funding socialists and independent candidates right away. but they don't. because "no bodies going to vote for them, so whats the point in helping them?" i feel like that says a lot about the usa.

Because the underdog is always relative to who you identify with. You can identify with Luke Skywalker (and to a lesser extent the Rebellion) or Daniel LaRusso without seeing anything of yourself within larger and more distant political concepts like "the working class" or "black Americans" or "the global south" or any other "underdog" in politics. And, indeed, those characters are tailor-made to identify with: they're generic, nonthreatening, they have tragic backstories, and their opponents are comically evil. And not to put too fine a point on it, but they're fiction, and people go into those movies knowing that. We do not use the same interpretive lens for real-world politics as we do for classic good-vs-evil kids' stories, so this is a little like asking "how can people root for Bugs Bunny and still eat meat." And in the sense that all the things in a movie that help you to root for the protagonist are purely affective devices of narrative (score, costuming, casting, sad music when they're sad, defiant music when they're up against the baddie), and that all the things which bind most people to their political tribe are affective in nature ("we God-fearing individualist, capitalist, freedom-loving conservatives who represent True American Values"), these kinds of stories increase, not decrease, the propensity of people swept up in them to identify with political conservatism.

So I think the premise of your ask is pretty silly. Star Wars and Karate Kid are not "socialist" narratives. They're very generic, and very simplistic. More troubling, you seem to think your political values are so self-evidently correct that anybody who disagrees with them must be a mustache-twirling villain a la Palpatine, someone not only obviously wicked to his craven supporters, but knowingly wicked to himself. That is just the same lazy affect-based political tribalism that so many conservatives engage in, except with the valence of good and bad flipped. Politics should be based on more than aesthetics.