#I might write more of this at some point because the idea is so tasty to me

[twicearoundthebend]

worstie wolverine backstory thoughtssss

What if it wasn’t a group of anti mutants that stormed the mansion - what if it was weapon x coming specifically to take Logan back

I’m going to ramble and I’m not fact checking so like - ramble back and correct me if you want

Logan had fucked off to get drunk again. Scott had pleaded as he left, but it was getting easier and easier to tune his voice out. Logan didn’t want a family, he didn’t want to be a guard dog, he wanted to be left alone. The cold of the bar was comforting, familiar - much more familiar than the warmth of the x mansion. He’d settled down to numb his brain till his thoughts froze over, but didn’t reach that point.

Instead, a news broadcast started. The reporter said it was a ‘mutant hate group’ and looking at the carnage he didn’t blame her, but she was wrong. Those uniforms, those faces, he knew them. He’d escaped them, he thought he’d destroyed them, but here they were murdering the people who’d taken him in.

Weapon X.

-

He’d ran to the mansion. Heart in his throat and lungs burning, but he was too late. The x-men were all dead, and the group of scientists and soldiers had left the scene. He’d left them, they’d pleaded for him to stay, and he’d left them to get attacked by his own demons.

He searched through all the bodies, checked over and over for signs of life, but there was nothing. Just vacant stares and still pulses.

A few hours in, he heard a wheeze. He whipped around, scanning, hoping beyond all hope, only for his eyes to land on a Weapon X soldier with vines growing through his chest.

Within a second he was looming over the soldier, ready to do anything for information. But he didn’t even get the satisfaction of torturing the information out of him. The soldier spat the truth out at him, gloating at his pain.

Weapon X had come to the mansion to retrieve Logan. To take him back to be studied, torn apart and put back together over and over again. To take his DNA and turn it into anything they set their minds to. They’d tracked him here, but when they broke through the doors he was nowhere to be found. They hadn’t planned to kill the x-men, but when no one would reveal any information about Logan, they tried to torture the information out. None would give anything up.

“After we’d asked such incriminating questions, they had to die. Can’t have any loose ends, can we? You’re a top secret weapon, Wolverine, and one we desperately want back in our possession.” The soldier managed to sneer around his pain, still looking at Logan like he was less than human. “Death of filth like them isn’t death, it’s mercy.” His face contorted, and before Logan could lop his head off, his eyes went hazy, and his breath stopped.

They had been here for him. They’d murdered the x-men for protecting him. Their last breaths had been spent fighting for him, while he’d been getting pissed. Broken bodies all around him - he couldn’t find anything inside of him besides overwhelming guilt.

[ratgirlexe]

To wrap up my thoughts on HDG as horror, now that I’m no longer in severe pain and writing my thoughts at 3 am:

I think the best summary of it all is that it’s hard for me to go into any given story and feel truly horrified, because I know on a meta textual level that everything is going to work out in the end, and the characters will likely be happier than when they started. I don’t know how to suspend my disbelief in the idea that ultimately things will work out, so even if the main character goes through any number of acts which are horrifying in *theory*. I almost empathize more with the affini putting them through that experience, more so than the character who’s point of view I’m seeing things from.

Are you a rebel feralist being put through awake surgery for your haustoric implant? It might be the scariest experience of your life, but that just means you get to be a floret now! You’ll have someone to care for and love you forever, and you’ll never have to be alone. Give it a week and you’ll be thanking them for doing so.

How about if you’re a terminally ill patient at end-of-life, or in excruciating pain that even the affini can't somehow solve? That's okay! We'll get you on a nice tasty regimen of class-O's, and you'll never hurt or be afraid again. There will be nothing but unending bliss, and you won't even realize that you're hurting. Not all suffering can be prevented, and eventually it all has to end, but heaven is real, and we've placed it inside you. Even in that last situation, which is the most personally scary to me, there's a certain level of bitter sweetness to it all. Maybe it's just the pain I've been in, but there aren't quite as many ways to end someones life that are as kind as bliss never-ending.

Ultimately I think it's just the fact that I know the affini are benevolent within the story, which makes even the most harrowing or scary events take on a more lighthearted tone for me. Yes, getting to where you want to be, where you *need* to be can be really scary. I'm autistic. Change is terrifying, change is death, and some changes can feel too monumental to ever surmount on your own. But to me HDG is a true escapist fantasy that says "Even if this change is scary, even if you can't choose to change for the better, even if the process hurts or makes you feel like you're dying, I'll be here with you to hold your hand and guide you through it. You don't have to go through it alone, and by the end you'll be able to blossom into who I know you can be."

And to me that's just not scary or horrifying. That's something that I yearn for each and every day.

[giggly-squiggily]

Howling With Mirth (Cafe Enchante)

I finally did it! Many days after I mentally decided to write it, I bring you Ignis! :D The fiery wolf boy- he deserves the world! (And tickles lols) I hope you like it! :D

Summary: Ignis is feeling a bit down after a disaster in the kitchen, so Kotone decides to fix it the best way she can.

“Ignis..”

Oh dear. He knew that tone. Slowly, Ignis turned towards the cafe’s kitchen, poking his head through the door to find his girlfriend before the fridge. When she caught his gaze, she held up a carton of eggs, empty sans a half shell stuck in one of the slots.

She raised an eyebrow wordlessly. He felt his face burn some. “Erm…it wasn’t me?”

“Ignis.”

“Okay fine!” He confessed, coming by to stand with her. “But I only used one carton!” Then he saw she was holding three cartons, all empty. “Erm…okay, I lost count. Omurice is hard to make! It wouldn’t do the thing- I kept making scrambled eggs!”

“And dropping them.” Misyr added, leaning against the doorway with an amused grin.

“Shut up! You could have helped!” Ignis growled, guilt settling in his gut as he watched Kotone sigh, shaking her head.

“What did you do with all the eggs? I hope you didn’t throw them out.”

“Hell nah, that’d be wasteful! I fed them to Kororo. Not all of them!” He quickly added to her wide eyed expression. “I fed everyone, myself included. They- erm, they might be sick of eggs.”

“Sick would be an understatement.” Misyr groaned, a little green. Ignis was a good cook, but one could only eat so many dishes of scrambled eggs and rice before he felt sick. “I don’t suppose Kariya’s coming in later- Ignis chased him down and forced him to eat at least two plates.”

“He’s a growing boy! He needs the protein!” Ignis argued, earning a small giggle from his girlfriend.

“You were tired of eggs too, huh?” She asked, grinning when he looked away. “It’s fine, but we do need to restock. You guys might be sick of eggs, but somebody’s gonna walk in craving them.” She reached out, gently taking Ignis’ hand in hers with a gentle smile. “Come on, shall we go?”

“Yeah, definitely.” He nodded, only letting his grin falter when he was sure she was looking away.

~~~

Kotone knew something was up. This was Ignis, afterall. Even without being his girlfriend, she had a good read on him and his emotions.

Shopping was lovely. Ever the devoted boyfriend, he made it a point to carry all the bags as they paid for their restock. On their way back, he walked on the side towards the street, one hand clutching their regained ingredients while the other held her hand. It was warm and calloused against her small soft ones, but she loved that about him. She loved everything about him.

What she didn’t love was this seemingly stubborn cloud hanging overhead, even after they stopped so she could buy meat for dinner. “I’m gonna grill you something really tasty!” She smiled at him as they paid, but it didn’t seem to make much of a difference. Did he really feel that bad over the eggs?

“Here we are.” She let out a happy sigh as she placed the bags on the counter, quickly putting everything away with a satisfied nod. “Take a seat, I’ll make you something to drink.” She nodded to the counter, insisting when Ignis asked to help. “You’ve helped so much today! You deserve a nice reward.”

Here she was now, daring a few peeks at her boyfriend as she made him his preferred tea blend. He seemed more down than before; likely because she wasn’t in the immediate room with him. He toyed with one of the napkins from the dispenser, folding it and unfolding it with an absentminded look on his face. It made her heart hurt, seeing him look so sad.

Did..did he think she was mad at him? The idea made her own feelings worse.

Well- if that was the case, she’d have to prove it to him she wasn’t. And what better way to do it then her go-to?

~~~

A cup of warm tea slid beside him, shimmering in one of the cute cups Kotone insisted they purchased when she first took over. Ignis was about to take it when he felt her arms come around him from behind, her face pressed into the center of his back as she squeezed. The gesture was enough to make him jump with a startled blush. “Whoa, K-Kotone?”

“Is it working?” She asked, as if he knew her intentions.

“Erm…maybe?” He offered, not sure what she was looking for. If it was to make his heart race like crazy, then yes. It was very much working. She smelled like coffee and soap and…was that lavender? He rather liked that smell.

“Maybe isn’t good enough.” That was all the warning he got before her hands slid to his sides, grabbing them and pressing in. “Tickle tickle tickle tickle tickle!”

Now- Ignis was from Beastia. He was the strongest fighter there, and also had the highest pain tolerance of anyone- including the cafe residents. He’s been in more fights than he could count, and he’s experienced nearly every physical sensation out there.

He should have known none of that mattered in the face of his greatest weakness.

“AH! Aheahahahhahahaha! Gehahahhahahaha! Hhehehehehhe K-Kohohohotohohoohne!” Ignis arched, nearly flying out of his seat at the touch of her hands. Then he remembered she was directly behind him and reeled himself into moderate squirming. “D-Dohohohohohn’t! Gehahahahha, nohohohoho whahahahhay! Aheahhahaa!”

“Is it working? Huh? Is it?” She asked, voice airy with her own laughter as she carried on kneading his waist. It was something Il offhandedly mentioned once- Ignis being ticklish. She rarely experimented with it herself; more often than not he was the one tickling her.

Not that she really minded it. But today- today was a special occasion.

“Whahahhat are yoohohohu tahahhahalking abohohohut? Whahahhat wohohohorking? Ahehahahahahaha!” Ignis was torn between doubling over and grabbing at her wrists, stuck halfway and just kinda flapping his hands as he kicked his feet and cackled. “Nohohoho, dohohoh-AHH!”

“Oo, bad spot?” She asked as she reached around further, clawing at his belly. He was..a fire wolf? Was that what they called him? “Hehe, usually dogs like belly rubs! You’re so ticklish, Ignis!”

“Whohohoho yoohohou cahahhalling a doohohohog? Ahehahahhahahaha, I ahahahint no puhuhuhuhup-EHHEHEHEH!” Another claw at his belly made him whimper through his mirth, the sound much like…a dog. “Dahahahahhamn yohohohohou! Aheahhahahahahaha!”

“Hehe, I know you’re not a dog! You’re my big strong fire wolf!” She kept one hand on his belly while the other moved to his ribs, finding an even greater reaction there. “Oo, ticklish ribs too? Look at you, you’re so sensitive!”

“Geahhahahahahha! AHehaha-WHA!” Ignis yelped as he turned sharply, falling out of his seat. Kotone jumped back to avoid getting injured, wide eyed as she watched him groan some on the ground. “Ignis?”

“Ehheeh..hehehehe..I’m fihihihine..” He stood up, making a show of stretching out. “Seheheee?”

“Good…” She nodded, staring at him. He looked back at her, suspicious. “So…did it work?”

He didn’t respond. Instead, he ran.

“I’m not letting this go until it works, Ignis!” She cried, laughing as she chased him around the cafe. Ahead of her, she could see him laughing just as hard, shoulders shaking and a big dumb grin on his face. “Come here!”

“Nehehehver!” He barked out a choked laugh, a scream following when she finally caught up to him. Down they went, shifting stools and tables before he was on his back, halfheartedly fighting her hands off as he laughed and laughed. “Wahhahait, wahahahit, pleahhahahse! Pleahahhase wahah-AHHEHAHAHAHHHAIT!”

“Never! Not until it works!” Kotone cried, shoving her hands up his shirt to tickle him further. Ignis kicked and thrashed beneath her, never with enough force to send her flying, but aiding in his avoidance. “Is it working? Huh?”

“AHHAHHAHA! FIHIHINE FIIHIIHIHNE, IT’S WOHOHORKING!” He shot his hands up, gathering Kotone in his arms within seconds. His laughter slowed down when she was trapped in his hug, taking slow giggly breaths. “Ohoohkay..ohohokay, wehehere dohoohne.”

Kotone was shaking against him, sending puffs of lavender into his nose. Had he not heard her giggling, he’d be worried. “Thahat was fun! We should do that more ohohoften!”

“Heh..yeah. Say, what was that for anyway?”

“Huh? Oh..I guess I never did tell you, huh?” She laughed, sitting up so she could meet his gaze. “You looked really upset after this morning- I wanted to cheer you up.”

Ignis blinked, staring at her. She flushed some under his shocked stare but held her ground. “It’s not a big deal if you used all the eggs. We were able to restock them.”

“Oh..oh, that-” He cleared his throat, averting his gaze. “That..that wasn’t what I was bothered by.” At her curious gaze, he continued. “I was…trying to learn to make omurice..cause it’s your favorite.”

Ah.

What-

Kotone blushed brightly, staring at him. “Wait- you were practicing..for me?”

“D-Don’t make such a big deal out of it!” He grunted, flushing as red as she. “I just- you always make things I like, and I feel bad you’re constantly cooking for me! I wanted to do it for you in return, but I kept failing and failing and…then I ran out of eggs.” His expression clouded, the memory of his disaster in the kitchen coming back. “I know it’s dramatic, but…I felt like such a mess. Not only could I not make your favorite dish, but I wasted your stock. Also I made the guys hate eggs.” The last bit earned a small laugh from Kotone, shaking him from his sad expression. “Sorry for worrying you so much.”

“You don’t have to apologize, not for this or for the eggs.” She leaned in and kissed his cheek, watching it flare up hotter. “The fact you tried your best means the world to me.

“Tell you what..how about tomorrow, you help me make breakfast, and I’ll show you how to make one! Just like I did when we first cooked together.” His eyes widened, something hopeful entering his expression.

“Really? You mean it?” He asked, grinning when she nodded. “I love you, Kotone.” He hugged her, making her laugh.

“I love you too. We should probably get up.” She went to sit up, but his grip was firm. “Ignis?”

“Oh yeah, we’ll get up soon. But first..” He grinned at her wolfishly, fingers curling into her sides and making her squeal with laughter. “I want some good ol’ revenge! This is for the dog comments!”

“Ahehhahahhahahahha! I’m shahahhaharry! Pelahhahhahahse!”

“Oh I’m sure you are, you dork!” He growled, laughing with her as the cafe filled with noise once more.

[dorylinae-supremacy]

Taking a break from writing striped hat so I can ramble about fae AU's again they're one of my fav things ever.

Tags: DSBI, dark Techno, dark Phil, dark Kristin, mentioned Kristin, kidnapping, impersonation, usual fae stuff tbh, its like 600 words of me rambling about fic ideas below the cut, read more if thats your jam.

Idk if I've mentioned it before but I've been toying with the concept that fae take the face of the first human they've tricked and then it slowly morphs into something thats more their own.

This isn't rooted in any actual folklore as far as I'm aware but I like the vibe it adds. It adds another layer of terror to every interaction with them. Each time you come across a fae, you're looking into the eyes of their first victim.

Maybe they tweak it a bit here and there so they can lure other humans better but I like to think it stays mostly the same. It also adds another layer to things from the fae's perspective as well.

A fae close to their family might deliberately pick out and push a human into a deal if they think it'll make them look similar to their other families faces.

It can also add a layer where fae bloodlines might literally just prey upon entire human families purely for aesthetics. The worst part is a human might not even know that thats the case, they might just chalk it up to a generational curse or bad luck.

Something like this wouldn't apply to four seasons since they werent born fae and thus already had their faces but that wouldn't apply to Phil. The dude they see could genuinely just be the face of some unlucky traveller centuries ago.

These faces could also be used as lures for other humans who might've known the tricked person before. All the fae has to do is look a little scuffed up and beg for help in a hidden circle and they've got a steady supply of victims.

It also means that if any of the humans they steal do get out somehow, the people they knew might turn away from them and assume a fae is tricking them.

I know I'm rambling but its such a tasty plot device.

But anyway I wanna try it eventually. I have one fleshed out fic in my head where fae!Wil tries to trick human!Techno but kinda messes up the order that you're meant to do things.

Fae take the face after as a trophy of sorts, he took it before making any deals to try and be more relatable to him since they're both kids.

Human!Techno is, of course, a very well adjusted prince and naturally decides that this fae is his twin and that he has to have him. So with the help of years of training against fae, he's able to trick Wilbur and steal him.

The rest of the fic is Wil being terrified because the yoink has been reversed but even after he reveals the fact that he's a fae Kristin and Phil have already decided to keep him. No running for him :)

But I have another in mind where twinsduo end up taking the faces of two princes in a kingdom but then get mistaken for actually being them.

Maybe the princes were playing in the forest before getting yoinked but either way a royal guard comes and just drags them back to the castle.

They can't really do much about it since they're super young fae and there's a lot of iron around but things only get worse when the antarctic empire invades and takes them hostage, still thinking that they're the actual princes.

Originally they were just gonna bide their time until they can go back into the woods again but now they're being kept as hostage and Phils getting more and more interested in how odd they keep acting.

Obviously it ends in them getting surprise adopted but I'm not sure how to get from point A to B yet so more brainrot will be scheduled for when I work it out.

[milekael]

heyyyy big bang ask time! 😍

fave royai headcanon?

most fun thing about the event?

favourite canon things about royai?

HEEY <3

fave royai headcanon?

OUGH a thing that is basically canon to them in my brain is like.... So during the time Roy was studying the tattoo right? I like to imagine that he considered proposing to her... It wasn't particularly out of love at that time. Roy thought Riza was pretty and they got along but nothing more, but well, considering the times that doesn't even sound too unusual. Roy was asked to take care of her and she needed support so that might have been good...

The only thing is... well, you know, he was going to war, and he could very easily die- And then what? Would he just marry a woman to then go and die and leave her?? Would he leave her to be stressed about this?? Also some time had passed between them living together and this, he didn't know if he knew her too well at this point and if this is something she would want. So he didn't .

AND OUGH I love that level of doomed narrative and think to look back on. I think if Roy did that and Riza did accept, she wouldn't have enlisted because... why would she. Sure she wants to be useful and do things to help others but also the Military predated on her because she literally had nowhere else to go. If she had at least that safety net then maybe she would have gone somewhere else........ There is also the possibility that Riza would NOT accept his proposal and even feel insulted by it and thats tasty too........ Idunno, is an idea that just exists as canon to me in my little microwave brain.

most fun thing about the event?

Working alongside a writer!! It was really fun collaborating and see the fanfic get written <3 and then get the ideas on what to draw, what is interesting to portray here and the emotions!! Also I really like the server <3 muak

favourite canon things about royai?

HELP idunno how to summarize my thoughts about them they literally just live in my brain SDFGH In here I made a small reading over how I like the way canon Royai deals with gender sdfgh

I think I just really like how they treat each other! Arakawa is very good a small dialogs giving you A Lot. I think Riza and her humor is the best example, normally saying wild shit with an straight face and Roy just looks at her like 🤨 Their conversations slide soo easily from formal military talk to making a jab at the other and is just!! Nice it is sweet it shows they have a whole dynamic on their own. THEY ARE!! FRIENDS!!! they are legitimately friends that's the casualness they talk with one another and I think that's why is soooo compelling to absolutely everyone.

IDUNNO IF THIS MAKES ANY SENSE is 4 am LOL huh my point is Arakawa's writing is good you get something out of every dialog.

[copperbadge]

Some Discourse On Fictional Chefs

I collected up all the discussion of Simon’s potential love interest in the Shivadhverse (and one about Twelve Points) and threw it in a post :D 

katestamps

If it is realistic at all, I’d love to be able to hand 12 Points to my musician daughter when she gets home from college around the 18th of May. That’s also the week after Eurovision. No pressure, I’m just excited for her to read it!

For a second I was like “If the book is realistic? Well, it kinda is, I’m working on that now” and then I realized you meant datewise :D I hope it is -- the book’s in final edits but a few of them are taking some time. I have to finish the edits, typeset, design the cover, upload, order proofs, approve the proofs, and then the thing can go out, which is not NOT doable by May, but it’s slightly iffy only because my April is super hectic. But most of the delay is usually in ordering the proofs (they take longer than they used to, to print and ship) so if I can get shit done BEFORE the hectic, we should be good. 

And now on to the chefs. I was a little amused, admittedly, because I didn’t vocalize clearly what I was asking about when I asked what people would like to see -- I was thinking more in terms of gender, sexuality, disability, race, etc. but I didn’t specify that, so instead I mostly got fascinating ideas for backstories and character aspects. Which is so fandom! I love it, I’m not mad or dismayed, it’s just also really funny. :D 

dignitywhatdignity

Are you thinking someone from Eddie's TV Chef circles, or more along Simon's own, more classical background?

spaci1701

A protégé of Eddie's who has taken over his show comes to do a special on the Country that Stole Our Star and had gotten a little big for his britches?

1968bullittmustang

It's probably too close to Eddie's character, but... What about one of those chef's that travel the world cooking the most awful (or best) local dishes with home chef's. Or maybe just a National Geographic photographer in country to do a piece on the 'One Highland' 😁

I’d like them to be a native Shivadh, only because most of the books to date have involved either total foreigners or expats returning, and both Royals/Ramblers and the football novel will as well. I’m hoping for someone who has moved to Fons-Askaz from the rural backcountry, but the idea is that Simon comes into conflict with someone who has a much less “fancy food from a classical background” style -- part of the conflict comes from each of them initially assuming the other has the inferior way of cooking. So -- more on Eddie’s line BUT not one of Eddie’s folks, because whoever this person is, they’re relatively local. 

Mind you, I do like the National Geographic angle. And I do kind of like the idea that someone else took over Truly Tasty. Eddie said that might happen. And that’s something I’d need to work into Royals/Ramblers so hmmm, making a note. 

dignitywhatdignity

(Or you could steal from the foodieverse! A classically trained hipster with a Michelin-starred food truck! A chain pizza scion with a flair for molecular gastronomy!)

Actually nicking some from the Foodieverse might be helpful -- maybe taking and twisting around Steve’s plotline from that universe a bit, though that doesn’t necessarily mean it has to be a Hot Male Hipster. But perhaps someone who trained classically and then decided it was all bullshit. 

spinningprincess

It's in my brain because it's what I'm writing, but I bet someone who's a little bit New Agey and leans hard into the symbolism of EVERY dish, whether from a "traditional foods of XYZ culture" standpoint or a "historically used for $magickal effect" standpoint, and like, talks about the energy of the kitchen, would be a great and interesting counterpoint to Simon's lack of that. And it's such a GOOD romance trope. (to be clear, I'm writing two different stories right now where no one ever cooks a food because they're hungry and want to eat A Food, it's all "well, basil is good prosperity magic, but cabbage is good prosperity magic and also the traditional food of my people, and...")

On the whole it’s an idea I like, but I’m not sure it’s fitted to this particular plot -- might be something to revisit with another character at some point, though. 

I’m discovering just how difficult it is to write hippie/new-age characters with Royals/Ramblers in part because so much of that mythology eventually traipses around towards anti-Semitism. Not necessarily food symbolism, and not ALL new age stuff is that way, but it really is a razor-fine line at times. 

knottahooker

My first thought was that terrifying lady chef from Ratatouille, she was fantastic. Someone with her personality, maybe? Cactus with a heart of gold who will absolutely stab you anyway.

My instinct is along those lines, at the least someone who is a trifle confrontational, but I feel like so much of it depends on other aspects of who they are, which is what I’m struggling to pin down. 

robinade

it would be funny if Simon's "nemesis" was, like, lactose intolerant or something so they have objections to French cuisine (so heavy on cheese and butter) but Simon doesn't know this at first and is mortally offended

musegaarid

What if Simon falls for a bodybuilder or a ballerina or someone on a really restrictive diet? If they were older and getting ready to retire, he could reintroduce them to good food.

I like both of these -- I think there’s particularly something to the idea of an athlete who has eaten a restricted diet, since that’s something that can alter more easily than allergies. But to make the story work they really do need to be a fellow chef. Which, there’s no reason they couldn’t have dietary restrictions AND be a chef, but I’m not sure I’d do either side of them justice that way. 

katestamps

Ooh, I just had the thought of Simon’s nemesis as a French chef which was actually an espionage cover. Think Julia Child, Cold War edition. (I also think of Simon as 5-10 years older than Michaelis which may or may not be accurate.)

Man, there is something to the idea of a spy. I’d say from Galia, but I don’t think Ofelia either wants or needs someone to spy on Fons-Askaz for her, she could just like, ask Alanna if she needs to know something :D Might turn this over in my head a bit, although it would again mean someone coming from outside the country. 

Simon is actually a trifle younger than Michaelis -- Michaelis was around 34, 35 when he hired him, and Simon and Hugo were both in their twenties. It still puts him in his fifties -- I do enjoy writing romances for older people, especially because there is something of a dearth of romance novels specifically featuring older men (they do exist but you run face-first into the “daddy” trope a lot, and “older man” in romance-speak often clocks in at “definitely under fifty”). Older women as the POV character are more common, I would imagine because older women are a huge target audience for romances. 

annechen-melo

Thinking about the love interest for Simon, someone who Absolutely Does Not Have A Media Presence beyond their cookbooks, and there is a Very Good Reason for that. That reason may be anything from an acerbic personality whenever someone points a camera in their direction to being just not good at Peopleing. Hmm. How international is the idea of Witness Protection Makeovers?

They could also just be crap at social media -- I’ve come to realize that every social platform EXCEPT tumblr is basically incompatible with my brain, and even the ones marginally compatible like Reddit, I just don’t find a ton of value in them a lot of the time. Which would be a nice foil to Simon starting up a recipe blog at the same time. 

strix-alba

I wish for Simon's love interest to be a salt-and-pepper-haired butch woman *shakes the genie's lamp*

There’s definitely a salt-and-pepper butch woman coming into the Shivadhverse at some point. :D I had her set for a later book, and not sure that’d be right for Simon, but I’m not ruling it out -- a fairly mouthy, fairly masc woman about Simon’s age is one of the strong potential characters I’m considering. 

Anonymous asked:

Shivadhverse: Concerning Simon’s love interest: would you consider someone like Catherine Bordey, owner of La Kaz,  from “Death in Paradise”? Or possibly even a French POC like her daughter? I’d really love 💕 to see a character who is both French and a POC. 😊

I’ve seen an episode or two of Death in Paradise but I don’t think I’ve encountered those two characters! I’ll have to see if my folks can educate me on them, they love that show. I am trying to figure out how to work more racial diversity into the books, so that’s a thought. Not necessarily French, but French-Shivadh; they do share a border. 

Anonymous asked:

maybe not a fit but I'll try anyway. what i'd like in a chef character is someone who tried something, really got into it, then backed out of it so hard. like the foraging culture, which could net you a research hole into local greens. what if they believe it's now too polluted to forage safely? and yet they have an encyclopedic knowledge of the seasons and life cycles of sidewalk dandelions. tl;dr cursed knowledge

As an aspect of the character that could work, although it gets difficult because like...the deeper someone is in something, the more I have to learn in order to put it out there :D I was looking at something along those lines, or at least something similar that might make them a bit brusque. Lots to mull on overall, anyhow. 

[stygianheart]

its a shame your fics dont have more art theyre so good like if I could draw well id probably turn them into picture books. do you wish you had art?

but besides the point I actually have questions and I wanna ask em.

first up, who’s the back up? luffys mentioned the backup a few times and I cant help but wonder who it is. if thats a major spoiler than you dont have to answer but considering your love for this one guy i kinda think its sabo or the rev army. either that or like traffy. it would be funny if it was sabo though because of koby’s brief jealousy of how luffy was talking about him.

this might be just me as an aot fan overanalyzing everything but I feel like that devil fruit in the beginning was something important and so was the auction in broad daylight.

also ive seen a lot of fics where kobys favorite food is buttered potatoes but i think yours is the first where his favorite food is downright plain butter. the guys a psychopath for that. like why would you do that. where did you even get the idea.

I also have some other questions! unfortunately uh revolving around the second favorite ship brymeppo…

does helhippo realize he likes bryan or no? also i really came into the fic thinking I wasnt gonna give a crap about him but somehow you made me like him a lot so kudos to you. his relationship with bryan is so rivals to lovers coded and thats one of my favorite tropes. I really do hope helhippo lives up to his promise and takes bryan to the symphony. I know that wont happen in tsats but if you could make a one shot of helhippo and bryan going out on small dates that would be amazing 🙏 for us rymeppo shippers #rymeppo shippers unite oh and as much as i wanna see bryan take revenge on elijah for all the things the guys done to him i also wanna see helmeppo smash the guys face in. please. kill elijah. I hate him.

omg sorry that this is so long but I still have some more questions!

kobylu wise, who do you think fell first? koby or luffy? its obvious that luffy likes Koby but why hasn’t he said anything? does he understand how he feels? and after this is all said and done how are they going to stay in contact? it’s not like koby can just talk to luffy whenever he wants since hes a marine and luffys the pirate king.

anyway thats all! I hope i was able to help your creativity in some way :)

I mean, yeah, art would be cool. But when it comes to engagement with my fics, the most I hope for is for someone to simply read it. Besides, it’s self indulgent! I’m just writing the stuff for me and sharing it along the way.

Anyway, questions. *pulls out glasses*

The back up? Well, it’s not Traffy, that much I can say. Considering we (last I checked) don’t know if Trafalgar is alive or not, I just decided to…y’know, leave him out.

Greetings, fellow AoT fan, you are NOT mistaken! I kinda like hiding little things in the fic—not EVERYTHING has a purpose like AoT, but a lot of things are put there for a reason. I like being sneaky like that.

And yes. Koby’s a psycho. He eats straight up butter—and said it tastes better when dipped in sugar. I got this weird headcanon from my bestie who also happens to eat butter sticks. I once saw him dip it in sugar and was so disgusted by it, and he was just like “it’s good for you. Besides, it’s ✨tasty✨” like sir no. What on earth. That’s weird. You do you, but please, not in front of me. Besides the point—for some reason I decided to implement that onto Koby. I have a habit of weirdifying characters.

As for the RyMeppo question… I seriously never expected people to love this ship so much wtf. In Chapter 5, Helmeppo is completely unaware of his very obvious crush on (B)Ryan. He thinks he hates Ryan, when it’s obvious it’s more than that. As of Chapter 10, however, the moron is 10000% aware of how he feels. He and Ryan’s relationship is really fun to write with the constant bickering/flirting. I never intended them to be a romantic relationship, but alas, that’s where it headed.

And the KobyLu questions! Yay! Koby definitely fell first and he fell hard—don’t think anyone could fall harder if they tried. As for Luff: he knows how he feels about Koby. Buddy went to Sanji’s school of flirting and failed the classes spectacularly yet tried showing off his grades to Koby. He’s made it very clear how he feels—Koby, unfortunately, is just too damn dense. Luffy could yell “I LOVE YOU” to Koby and he would probably think Luffy meant platonically. He gets his density from me, of course, I’m the exact same way.

I hope I answered your questions well! Thanks for the ask, it actually did help a bit.)))

[if-seal]

if seal i have a big scene i need to write that is Very Important but i only manage to procrastinate away time when i try to write it!! what should i do :(

Dear Friend with a Scene of Much Importance,

Did you know that elephant seals sleep at 1200 feet while doing "sleep spirals" during dives? One might think that this is procrastination, but it is very important to catch up on rest when you're in the cold reaches of the ocean and need to avoid orcas.

Which is to say, sometimes writing does not look like writing.

Sometimes it looks like moving your body in a way that suits you, or going outside and touching grass (or water, if you're me), or reading a bit of a book or playing a bit of a game that inspires you.

Please do not beat yourself up for finding this hard because shame is bad for everyone and no amount of guilt will get words on the page. Those of us who are chronically ill or neurodiverse will know that if we don't take any time to rest, we won't be able to outswim those orcas.

But, yes, there is still that blank page and if you want to swim through this scene to reach the tasty squid on the other side, you will need to fill up that page.

Is there something about your work environment that you can change? Something as simple as changing up your computer's wallpaper or how your text editor looks can trick your brain into getting into gear. Some dear writer friends with ADHD have sworn by Stimuwrite - you could try it out. Writing in the bath can get stodgy sometimes so I slither out to my local river and enjoy the sound of the breeze and birds out there while I write. (My roommate @hpowellsmith goes to the local coffee shop which, blech, coffee?)

Do you have your scene planned out on paper, on a flowchart, or as bullet points - whatever suits you? Prepare it like a delicious meal by breaking it up into smaller, manageable chunks to eat more easily. The more certainty you have about what your Very Important Scene will contain, the easier it will be to get the words down.

You could also code the scene in small chunks before you do any writing so that you are not having to juggle writing and coding at the same time.

Are you happy with what your scene is doing? Maybe there's something about it that is a little too complicated, or there's something that seemed like a great idea when you were first planning, or there's a bit where the player is being pushed around by the plot in a way you didn't intend at first, or the characters feel out of your control. Maybe there's something you could trim to simplify things.

Take a look at what you've currently got in the scene and if there's anything you're unhappy with, change it - better to do that now than while you're writing it or when editing.

Can you write the scene in a different order than how you're trying to do it right now? You could start at the middle or end instead of the beginning of the scene. Sometimes starting at the end can make it feel less overwhelming and you'll get a better idea of where you're going.

Finally, try using small targets, whether that's time, wordcount, or how far you are through your scene. Five minutes of writing is a small amount but it is still five minutes well spent and maybe you will want to do another five once you're done. Make a pact with writer friends to write a particular amount and check in with them afterwards; give yourself a reward when you reach your manageable target; make a tick chart or a sticker chart or have little snack rewards.

(Don't spend all day researching notepaper and fountain pens to make the tick chart look beautiful though! I beg you!)

Something I have noticed when rereading my work is that I remember when a scene was truly horrible to write. I remember the points of my games when I needed to lie on the bathroom floor and groan about it and wave my flippers feebly.

But readers will not notice. They will just fall in love with your game about a gay selkie finding love and drama while living in a lighthouse. And when the huge complicated Very Important scene when the storm happens and the shipwreck is dependent on the equipment you've chosen and the people you have with you... they will be so excited.

It won't be a worse scene for having been tough to write: it may even be better.

And if you need to lie and groan a bit, that's OK. Just remember that you CAN swim through it.

[indignantlemur]

Let's talk about Andorian foods!

Without at doubt, one of the most enjoyable things about creating Émigré has been creating Andorian foods. We know so much about Vulcan and Klingon food, but Andorians are horribly overlooked beyond a few basic descriptions of beetles, blue meat, and a kind of flatbread. That's like, a meal. Tops. Even if you include drinks, which are ice-tea, hot coffee, and booze, you're not really moving beyond a single meal's worth of food types. And here's the thing - food is a central point in almost every culture there is. How we prepare food, what we consider food, how we present and share it, when and where and with what utensils - all of that is a huge part of most cultures. We have foods that are only eaten on special days, or only for certain meals. We have foods that have special meanings when given as gifts, and things that are traditional to give as part of social customs around weddings and funerals. We have comfort food, junk food, traditional food, fusion food, I'm-too-tired-to-cook food, and so many more kinds. We have entire branches of culinary expertise dedicated to JUST sweet foods. We have specialists who brew, pickle, and blend. We have random folks who make their own mead, or brew their own beer or wine. We have dozens of different kinds of salt for different kinds of finishing touches, for goodness' sake!

So yeah. I have a problem with the whole Andorians-only-eat-like-four-things-maybe approach. It's lazy. I hate lazy writing. So let's talk about some of my ideas, maybe? If anyone's still reading? (hello?)

Andorians are group-oriented people who put their society and their clans before themselves. Group meals therefore feels like a natural continuation of this trend, things like hotpots and fondues, and those fun little sushi bars where the tasty things go 'round and round on a little belt and you just pick up what you like and try not to fuck it up and fumble some painstakingly assembled sushi in front of the guy who made it.

One of the first ideas I came up with following this logic was the idea of a multi-layer lazy-Susan kind of dining table, with concentric rings that allowed for people to rotate each ring independently to pass around different bowls and plates of food, which a central spot for a pot of hot oil to cook your selections with. The utensils by necessity would have to be long-necked and pronged to spear food effectively and not lose their tasty bounty to the boiling oil. The seating around this table would be low, with cushions on the ground in an inset kind of pit in the floor because my Andorians are big on cuddles and sharing warmth. They're a social species, after all, and their home planet is far from a picnic - sharing is surviving.

Let's move onto other kinds of meals! Some of the canon lore indicates that Andorians eat a kind of flatbread and shredded meat, but very little in the way of dairy. So, from that we can conclude that they have at least some kind of flour. From there we can suppose that if they have a basic type of flour they might also have baking beyond flatbreads, even if they don't go in for fluffy yeast-based breads. That leaves quite a few options, really, but I liked the idea of their flour stemming from a starchy tuber like taro-root, or even potato-like spuds. Fried potato flat-bread sounds pretty great, right?

Now for the meats! Andorians are omnivores with a heavy carnivorous leaning, to my mind, because protein gives us the most bang per buck out of the basic food groups. Meat by itself is a solid food choice, but it gets boring after a while so we, and presumably Andorians as well, come of with different ways to dress it up and make it taste different. Salt would be abundant given the expansive oceans on Andoria and in the lore salty things register as spicy to Andorians, so that's practically a new lease on life food-wise! From there, sauces and marinades are a natural evolution, and I really like the idea that each keth has their own unique recipes that they hoard like gourmet dragons. No one knows what all goes into Clan Tha'an's mustard sauce, but by the Spirits is it good! Still, they can't afford to be too reliant on meat as a food source. Andoria is, as we've discussed, a harsh planet. Hunting for meat is a viable survival strategy, especially in large groups, but hunts fall through or go badly. When that happens, it's imperative that a population has something else to live off of: in this case, tubers! Savoury tubers, sweet tubers, starchy tubers, stringy tubers, every kind of tuber! Tubers are quite a resilient kind of plant and they can grow most places as long as the conditions are mostly right. Deep underground, away from the freezing surface temperatures, tubers would grow quite well - especially near a hotspring!

So, we've got tubers, we've got flour, we've got meat - and you know what, if we've got tubers that means we've got space sweet potatoes. Space sweet potatoes could be refined into a kind of sugar substitute! And that means we have BAKING.

After realizing that, I remembered finding a word in an Andorian-English dictionary which references an endearment and also a sweet treat: shev'tak. Quite a troublesome word, if you've read Émigré!

Humans call each other food-related endearments all the time; honey-bun, sweetie-pie, sugar-boo, dumpling, etc. Why not Andorians too, right? But Andoria is a very harsh planet, and things like sugary treats would be quite unusual, and probably very expensive to grow the base materials for and then refine. Given that their diet is probably heavily meat- and tuber-based, given their biology and the conditions of their homeworld, sugary treats would be a very rare, special-occasion-only thing for the majority of their history. They'd probably end up being made in very small portions, too. When I initially thought about shev'tak, I was tempted to make it some kind of sweet bun, but that seemed a little too boring when I sat down to actually describe them. Eventually, I hit upon the idea of these impossibly delicate little pastries, folded in on themselves and shaped like sixteen-pointed stars (or other multiples of four, which is deeply symbolic in Andorian culture) and filled with a creamy custard. Something plausible and demonstrating the artistry for which Andorians are known, but nothing excessively complicated in terms of ingredients. All the work goes into the presentation, and as a gift shev'tak would be a sign of regard at the least and certainly of affection. It would be the equivalent of a fancy box of chocolates, if each chocolate was hand-made specially for you. In the modern era, much of the craftmanship would be subsidized by advanced machinery and more efficient techniques, much like today on our world, but there would still be a strong association of luxury, of hand-made sweets on a frozen ice planet where very little grows and none of it above ground.

And being called shev'tak, in light of that, may be a little more than just an endearment, I think. It's being called something special, something worth burning time and resources for. Precious, even.

But, of course, Andorians are very stoic. They leave a lot of their social norms unsaid, and trust that these things are simply understood. Even when they aren't.

... Are we having Dagmar/Shral feels yet?

[thoughtfullyrainynightmare]

For the ask game you posted, could you please answer 14, 23, 39, and 43? (Sorry if it's a lot of questions.)

And for a question not from that one ask game, if you could write a story arc set entirely within Thea, what general plot thread would it center around and what team of BC characters would you want there (I think 5-6 characters is a good enough list)? This one will probably take time to answer and that's kind of the point, I like a bit of a wait, heh heh.

Hiya Erika!! Of course you may ^^

14. Do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

Yes. Actually, I love the smell of rain in itself. Specifically if it's in nature, or close to the forest. The air just smells so fresh. And most often it combines with the scents of pine or grass or just... the nature around

23. How do you feel about chilly weather?

I meeeeaaaaannnn.... I'm from a cold country. But it depends on the kind of chilly weather. The autumn, humid kind of cold I hate. It seeps into one's bones and just ... It's cold as hell.

But if it's the kind of dry coldness, that's much more bearable. And enjoyable. Also, actually, I think that chilly weather during spring is also... less freezing? Like +4 C and we're out in hoodies because... It's so warm! Sip your coffee, or tea and just enjoy the weather.

I am a summer child by heart, but the contrast between cold and warm (dry cold and warmth) is enjoyable to me.

39. Do you use lip balm?

Yes. Though... my latest lip "balm" that I bought was labelled as "lip oil" so it's more of a .... gel? I think it was over-priced, but at least it tastes nice (raspberry-peach).

43. What’s your take on spicy foods?

It's kinda funny that... I had this conversation with an irl friend some months ago, when he (a poc) asked me, in a very courteous manner, if I can handle spice. And my reply was something along the lines of "my skin tone is the colour of milk, and I have a spice tolerance to match". Which was meant as a humorous reply, but genuinely my spice tolerance is low. I do enjoy some spice in some dishes, but it really depends on the dish, and even then the spice level according to most would probably be quite low.

So, what is considered as "spicy"?

Spicy food can be tasty, really tasty, but if the heat overpowers the taste, and it just burns, then I personally don't enjoy such dishes. I'm just a weakling when it comes to spicy food, but spice that I can handle, I enjoy.

---

For the story... I think it'd be a kind of an exploration fic. Or getting to know Thea, because I like exploring my own country.

I'd probably include Owen, to explore the health care aspect of it. Probably Charlotte, because, honestly, I think she'd enjoy being in Thea, and for the YamiChar aspect, I'd probably include Yami too. Perhaps he'd even be intrigued by the country, and how it functions, along with how it's different from Hino and Clover. Practically speaking it might be beneficial for Nozel to also go there.

But the way it's formulating, the idea, it'd probably be the Captains, along with Owen, familiarizing themselves with Thean customs and practices. All of them could probably find an aspect that they find intriguing, and enjoyable.

I know this is a bit vague, but... my brain works by me placing the characters into the setting, and then I just "follow them around", so to find out what happens in the story, I'd have to start writing it, or mapping it out.

[ephemeronidwrites]

Shout out to @the-cryptographer, because they asked for one of the prompts in my OC tag game, and while I find the prompt they chose to be extremely tasty and I am going to spend at least the next week alternately going feral with excitement and getting insufferably nitpicky about getting some irrelevant detail absolutely perfect... I also don't want to leave them completely hanging for as long as I am going to take to write what they actually asked for.

So in the meantime, here's one of the prompts I've already been working on from that list... completely unprompted.

Does that defeat the purpose of a prompt exercise? Mmmm probably. Do I care?

4: A letter from your OC to their love interest

A letter intercepted from an anonymous courier met during the second week of Haring, 9:40 Dragon, in a border town between Orlais and Nevarra.

Darling,

I thought I was going to pass the time on this journey writing down every filthy thing I wanted to do to you. And then touching myself about it. Then writing down everything I did to myself, then thinking about you doing the same things to me and touching myself about it all over again. Then sending you everything I wrote down in a big fat bundle.

If I work at it hard enough, I might even manage to get the pages so sticky I won’t need wax to seal them up.

Especially since the “Inquisition” is everywhere these days, so I put the chance of one of their agents intercepting this letter at about 4 to 6? Don’t get me wrong, this letter is meant strictly for your lovely eyes only, but I admit I do also get a kick at the thought of this letter making its way into the hands of some “innocent” Chantry Sister. Maybe I can scorch out her eyes with the sinful acts depicted therein. Or even better, spice up her dreams so hard that she’ll have to pray until her knees are skinned raw to make up for it.

But now I must do a bit of confessing of my own, and say that since we’ve been apart, I simply haven’t been interested in any of that. Both my daydreams and night fantasies of you have been scandalously chaste, things like snuggling in the same bedroll at night, or waking to your sleeping face, maybe getting to poke your nose before you wake up.

Are you surprised? I am, but somehow I think you wouldn't be.

Our old friend would surely be offended by this sort of… “base sentimentality”, I think she used to call it? She’d probably keelhaul us first, before moving onto the penance. I imagine ropes being involved. Or hot wax. I don’t know. When it came to the finer points of what counts for proper debauchery, I was never really the authority in our little group anyway.

But since she isn’t here… I’ll indulge this sappy nonsense all I like. After all, less time spent on fingernail grooming is more time left to fantasize, right?

Besides, something tells me it’s this sort of thing that the Chantry would take greater offense to. The idea that mages might actually be people, with feelings. People-feelings, the sorts of feelings that don’t involve cackling and people going off the rails and firestorms raging everywhere.

After all, you know better than anyone else how afraid I was that I was that your our little stunt at the Kirkwall chantry building might have made that particular misconception worse. So you might feel vindicated to know that, after all these last few years, all I’ve learned from being reluctantly dragged all over Thedas is that… I might have been giving you far, far much too much credit on that count.

And it’s not as if people need encouragement or teaching to know how to fear, or hate, or blindly follow. Funny how most people would sooner part with a literal arm or a leg—or march off to war, which is functionally pretty much the same thing—than they’d let go of an idea that’s outlived its usefulness. It’s mildly depressing, but what can a mage do, other than go on fighting the good fight?

Or I guess it’s pretty presumptuous to call any part of it “good”. There’s been nothing “good” or “pretty” about… a lot of the stuff we’ve lived through, hasn’t there Shit there I go again I can’t sleep or eat without you there when I stretch out my hand or when I turn my head to look at you, and I’m terrified I’ll never NO NO that’s no good F why am I like this

Maybe I’ll write instead that I want to hold you close and sniff your hair! It’s not a lie, and I’m sure someone out there can find a way to twist that into something perverse and immoral? I believe in them! I believe that creativity isn’t dead in Thedas!

Either way, since I’m not there to do it for you, kiss yourself for me, with or without any filthy thoughts in your head. (And make sure to eat something at least twice a day, be nice to Justice, Justice go easy on him… basically pretend I’m actually there to nag you so you won’t forget to do all these things. Promise me you will do that.)

Sealed with a kiss of my own (since I know you won’t listen to me, darling, you never do),

Your little mistake.

In addition to the letter, the envelope contained three gold coins and also had attached a missive—written in the same hand—ostensibly meant for the courier's eyes:

Your life and freedom are more important than this letter. If you fall into a sticky spot, do not hesitate to put your own security first. The letter is important, but disposable. I repeat, do not allow yourself to be captured.

Reconnaissance efforts to identify the courier or find any other information about their objective or destination proved fruitless. The money was added to the appropriations funds for Inquisition soldier requisitions.

[katarinamiljkovic66]

~ Excursion ~

🚍 Activity title: Excursion

🚍 Duration and amount: 25th of May- 2nd of June

🚍 Type of activity: activity, creativity

~ Activity Description ~

After months of seemingly never-ending exams and intense anticipation for a well-deserved summer break to begin, at last, the first day of school excursion had finally arrived. The plan was to visit three countries: Italy, France, and Spain, but I wouldn't have minded if they added one more, just for good measure. 

There were a lot of complaints about the organization of the trip, which I personally didn't have problems with. Sure, when we arrived in some cities, such as Nice, we didn't see much due to how dark it was and how little free time we had. But with how many cities we had visited, it was a welcome surprise that a situation like that had only happened twice throughout the whole trip. Most cities we got to see in their entirety, even getting two to three hours of free time for whatever activities we wished to do. 

Having already been to Barcelona, I didn't share the same amount of excitement about going there as my friends did, but I was excited for the free time we would get there. I had planned to buy presents for my family and partner, and I had no luck up until that point, so I was hoping my luck would change, and it did! I got my mom spices that I know she likes and my partner a small replica of the infamous Sagrada Família.

The hotels were all great, and the quality of the food that was served was delicious! While the Lloret de Mar hotel had the most choices to pick from, the most delicious food was served in the last hotel near Verona. They had all sorts of tasty pastries to choose from for breakfast, and while that might not have been ideal for those who don't have a sweet tooth, it was perfect for me :>

The weather was nice for most of the trip, except when we visited Genoa. It was raining for the first hour, so me and my friend entered a bakery shop to wait for the rain to stop, but also because we were getting really hungry. We ordered the city specialty, Focaccia, which is a flatbread either plain or with ingredients such as olives, onions, or rosemary. This city also had a candy shop in which I was able to buy caramels for my mom since she loves them.

I can't stress enough just how much I absolutely loved our visit to the Dalí Theatre-Museum. Each room of the museum was unique, with each one having different ideas presented using different art techniques. I took pictures of most, if not all, of the art works that I saw because of it, but my favorite were the ink drawings of weird and original characters in the hallways. They had a certain charm, and by the lines on the drawings, you were able to tell just how professional they are and how hard it would be to even try replicating them, let alone coming up with ideas similar to those. 

While I really can't complain about any of the cities that we visited, with each one being beautiful in its own way, I have to say that my favorite city that we visited was Verona. It is not as big as Barcelona, and I like that about the city. It is extremely beautiful with the Arena di Verona, Via Mazzini, and Castelvecchio. The most beautiful was, of course, Juliet's house and her statue. The walls of her house had so many names and initials written on them of couples, and I barely managed to find a blank spot to write our own. The shop beside the house was so amazing, I'm pretty sure I spent a good 40 minutes inside, which my wallet can also attest to me doing.

~ Reflection ~

This was such a wonderful, once-in-a lifetime experience that I will never forget! Each day was filled with fun activities and hangouts that I will always remember and look back on fondly. I am beyond thankful to everyone who helped organize this trip, and I hope that the next generation has as much fun on their excursion as we did on ours!

~ Learning Outcomes ~

🚍 Identify own strengths and develop areas for growth

🚍 Demonstrate that challenges have been undertaken, developing new skills in the process

🚍 Show commitment to and perseverance in CAS experiences

[keefwho]

June 18 2024 - Tuesday

10:25pm

3/10

The title of this blog is very accurate lately. I dont know who I am, I don't always know why I write these entries. I know I want to express myself and document who I am/what I do but I don't always feel connected with it. In that sense, I am not always successful in using this journal for it's purpose.

This morning for no reason I can identify, I woke up extremely tired and without appetite. I didn't clean, instead I watched XQC on Kick react to some pretty good videos. I took my shower and made soup for breakfast since I didn't feel like eating anything else. I noticed I have 1 more day of coffee grounds so I need to go to the store tomorrow. I didn't start work on time and I didn't intent to stream either. I watched the Nintendo Direct and am looking forward to the new Zelda although I couldn't feel excited today. When DS was on her lunch break, she wanted content so I booted up my stream just for her which also kickstarted me actually working. She couldn't stay very long but I kept going until I had to work on secret versions of the commission I was doing. It was hard pushing my way through it, I wasn't happy with the piece and I had the daunting obligation to do really well with the fluids lest I hear complaints about it until it's perfect. I think he picked up that I wasn't in the greatest capacity and did my best though, which in my opinion fits within what I advertise. No one can expect perfection out of me, I can't even enforce that on my own works sometimes.

When I was done I spent a good amount of time re-installing KSP and trying to sort out the mod situation. It all feels like a waste of time because I fear that the save will become corrupt again. I might cull my modlist again for an even more basic playthrough.

For lunch I made a homemade tortilla and mixed smoked ham, veggies, and mozzarella cheese to put in it. I was hoping such a hardy and tasty meal would sort of revitalize me but it didn't. It was good though. After lunch I intended to get back to work or at the very least do the request but I found myself feeling too bad to do it. Instead I messed around with KSP more and watched Squeex on Twitch. At some point in the evening I had the brilliant idea to whip out my lovense toys to destroy my body which was actually just an attempt at trying to distract myself from how I was feeling. It kinda worked. Beforehand I just spent a lot of time laying naked on a towel in front of my heater enjoying the feeling. I called DS after doing my dishes and fiddling around with KSP even more before sitting back and enjoying the content she had on while she did some sewing on her fursuit. When she left to head upstairs, the physical way I was feeling all day finally took it's toll and I succumbed to the realization of how depressed I am and always have been. The weight of everything making me unhappy whether I can do something about it or not came crashing down on me. I had a good cry and deliberately opened up to DS about it briefly since I know this is exactly the kind of thing I can't keep keeping to myself. I felt bad because she had a good day and I felt like a weight pulling that down but I can't keep beating myself up with that kind of logic. I'm a hurt person experiencing something hard and all I really need is to know that someone hears me and cares about it. After she went to sleep I watched some Minecraft content.

Despite what I said at the beginning of the journal, I resonated with the stuff I did today now that I look back. I was here for it, I've been "here" my entire life. I'm not in a time loop, every day is brand new and another step in an everchanging life/world. I will find solutions to the things that drain my being and bring me sorrow.

[the-firebird69]

Watch "Eric Clapton - Cocaine" on YouTube

I dropped a few pieces of our candy in Naples and that is where the author of Willy Wonka and the chocolate factory wrote the story and resided for years. It was one of Hera's clan. And we made the chocolate and he made the story about it and found it to be absolutely delectable and it showed up there one day and it is the first place that ever showed up and we did it because we know he was going to write the story and he wanted to write the story. It is a fascinating story about this confectionery but the person who wrote it was into the bombs and bomb making and was part of the bomb program of the Manhattan project. And he was not Dr Manhattan but he was one of them who was doing the engineering. And he was pretty strict and smart and sharp and dangerous to us. And he wrote the story knowing what the cocaine was from hoping people would fight over it and people want to find out where our source of cocoa is, and really they call it cocai, but it is one of the same plant and not everyone figures it out so I'm going to bring in more and I'm selling it to people on the black market and they're selling it without telling where it's coming from and people want to know where it's coming from and they might not get it it has happened before but with Dave and Carol and they did figure it out and it became less of a legend but nowadays it's going to become huge and very huge okay so it's going to start up pretty soon

Apollo and Goddess Wife

Olympus we love our father and mother from Russia and we do respect him very much and we're helping with the project and we can't wait to see it take off

This is a very important part of our son and daughter's mission and it did it very well and needed father and mother in their health from Russia and both sides and more they were having a lot of trouble getting anything to work and they started working and found tons of stuff and it saved everybody's lives

Thor Freya

Of course we should say something stupid well that's behind the scenes I don't say stupid I'm thinking what are you doing you stupid and why wouldn't we it's tired he says I just wanted to get on something else until I fall asleep it's kind of how it's going but this chocolate is awesome and I hope you can get some and they want him down in Naples now to test it and they want him to find out if he knows what it is he says all he can compare it against is the chocolate party had it takes a few seconds like this no sugar added Taffy and then it's wonderful in your mouth it's an experience and that's Happy is not Willy Wonka but it is a fairly decent recipe and we did test it it's pretty decent people love it it's wonderfully tasty so I'm going to go find some down there in Naples and I'm going to get my car out I'm going to try and beat my husband to it

Hera

Oh no it's it's on and it's called The cannonball run and it's probably has to do with the huge ships and thorium and that's what the huge ships are for

Mac daddy

We're going to have it out with them maybe but really we're going to break it out too and we're going to terrorize the super car people like you Mac

Trump

Oh my oh my God and yes it's the little guys from India and we have to say and a choice in what we do sometimes it's kind of hell here and we know what he's saying it's hot it's disgusting people are jerks some kind of ship over us all day and Tommy f is an ass but really we want him to have Indian food and he doesn't have much money and he's trying to do things that are effective and we can see it so we're going to try and help him and get him some and he does know about it it's a great idea it says he loves Indian food and it probably ate way more money than he pays but that's not the point dammit

Haji and wife and I have used the name and I am Indian

[thefloofabounds]

Random Rambles Chapter One CW: Longer Post

Random rambles are going to be blog posts where I just talk about whatever comes to mind. I want to try and do these regularly and then maybe have hyper focus posts that are about specific topics. I also think I'll do these in longer formats than specific topics. I'd like to point out I will try my best to always add a content warning for longer posts. I personally enjoy knowing if a read will be longer or shorter sometimes depending on the topic and my own mood.

Besides, I've got to learn to just write about anything and not need to plan these. That seems the best way to practice writing. I can practice planning writing once my writing muscle is more developed.

I have two people following me on Tumblr.... I never thought I'd say i have anyone following me on Tumblr! So, new followers, if you're reading this, then I love you, thank you, you're awesome and I really encourage feedback if you're willing. Anything you wanna talk to me about I'd love to hear it. I wanna know what it is you're passionate about that you saw reflected here. I wanna know which part of the great wide world is one we both love enough for you to find and follow me!

This week has been a rough one mental health wise. Last night I cried myself to sleep trying to avoid a full blown panic attack because life is terrifying and i don't know what the hell I'm doing. I always seem to forget that my therapist (now on #4 so hopefully this one works out) keeps telling me that if I need help in between sessions to call so I've been white knuckling it until my appointment on the 23rd.

Anywho, that's a depressing train of thought and since this space is mine to use as I wish and I wish to change the subject and use the internet for it's intended purpose of escaping reality.

I've got a lot of new poems I've worked on lately. I might post some here, but I'm toying with the idea of reading them and posting videos of that on TikTok. It's my go to escapism app. It has audio and visual input and engages my brain in oh so tasty ways that allow me to slide blissfully into the sea of time as it sweeps me several hours into the future of my life. The only issue is my perfectionism goes into overdrive when I'm recording myself. Now I have to worry about my appearance and what I actually sound like, not what someone's mind imagines I sound like. I tend to rerecord until I get flustered and just stop posing altogether. I want to get more comfortable on camera, but that is a project for another day.

I have hit my wall. My brain is blessedly quiet because it's all written here and my bed is calling me. As always friends, if you've made it this far, I love you, you're awesome, and I hope you have a wonderful evening. Sweet dreams and goodnight!

[raychleadele]

A fish update!

Since writing this post, I’ve had multiple cans of sardines. I think they’re my favorite of what I’ve tried. I bought a second can shortly after eating the first, but in a different brand just to see if there was a difference. Both cans were boneless and skinless and seemed similar in quality and flavor, but I’m curious to try a skin on variety next.

The anchovies were intensely salty to the point where I wasn’t sure what to do with them - I’ve used anchovy paste before to make homemade Caesar dressing, which is fantastic, but the anchovies themselves were a bit overwhelming. The smoked oysters were tasty on crackers with some cream cheese and red onion, but not world shattering. The texture is a little odd. Maybe a better brand would be more exciting. I saw a suggestion (possibly on Reddit) to batter and fry them which sounds amazing so I may need to buy them again to try that.

I’ve also tried canned mackerel since originally writing this post, and found it delightful! It’s a much milder flavor than the sardines, not as funky, and tastes like it would make a good substitute for canned tuna. I had some in a sandwich first, and more this morning in a salad with Kalamata olives, croutons, and the aforementioned homemade Caesar dressing, which really hit the spot.

And since I’ve been pressured by the universe to become obsessed with canned fish, I started painting them. So now I’ve got a small series of fish paintings. Life is weird.

I’m planning to run some errands today and might stop at a different market to see what kinds of canned fish I can find because I’m all out now. If you have opinions on canned fish I would love to hear them, especially if you have ideas for different ways to prepare and eat them!

Lately I’ve been really craving greens. Just absolutely slamming salads, putting them in wraps, on my morning egg toast, wilted into my pasta. Mixed greens everywhere. Spinach and arugula my beloveds. Also tried watercress for the first time and found that delightful. Loving my leafy greens. Figured there must be something in them, a vitamin or other nutrient, that my body really needs, because I’ve been going through them like crazy.

Relatedly, I recently paid an in person visit to the grocery store. I usually order for pickup to save on time, but this day I wasn’t able to for some reason. I was buying canned clams to make my late grandpa’s clam chowder. It’s a traditional Christmas/New Year’s season meal for me, I had to have it.

And when I picked up my can of clams, I became entranced by how many different canned fishes there were on the shelves. Sometimes I buy tuna, but I’d never touched most of them. And I know I was shopping hungry and when you shop hungry everything sounds good, but on that day the canned fish sounded really good. I thought “Idk, maybe I could be the kind of person who likes canned sardines.”

Then I snapped out of it and realized how hungry I was, and thought how insane it is for me to crave unfamiliar canned fish when I hardly eat the familiar variety I do buy, and reassured myself I’d get a meal when I got home, and I walked away without ransacking the shelf of canned fish.

But then I did it again at the fish counter at the Asian market a week later. I stood there for a full ten minutes, studying the dozens of whole fish they had that I’d never tried before, thinking maybe this would be the day I’d finally try filleting a fish for the first time, before deciding there weren’t any in my price range that looked fresh enough (I am in the only triple landlocked state of course), and walking away with no fish.

Then I saw that post here about someone who slammed three cans of fish and then learned they have lots of nutrients that help with seasonal depression. And I remembered how I’ve been slamming so many salads. And I thought huh, maybe my body is trying to tell me something about fish.

Then one of my favorite food YouTubers uploaded a video all about how people eat canned fish around the world and I said OKAY! CLEARLY I NEED TO BUY THE FISH!

So when I ordered groceries yesterday to prepare for the coming blizzard, I ordered canned fish. Specifically, I got one can of sardines, one can of anchovies, and one can of smoked oysters.

Today I cracked open the can of sardines for lunch. I taste tested a small piece and it was delicious! So I toasted an English muffin, spread it with some cream cheese, topped it with some thin sliced red onion and my beloved mixed greens, and added some sardines on top. Drizzled the top with some of the sardine oil and had an open faced sandwich. It was messy, because the minute I tried to bite into it all my toppings fell off, but it was delicious.

So anyway, I guess I am the kind of person who enjoys canned sardines now.