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dylynniscoding · 10 months

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I Made a Spell Search for DnD 5e

The time has come. The first big project for class. It was daunting. It seemed so far out of my abilities I thought to myself "What am I going to do? How can I do this? Am I even capable?" The project criteria were to create an app using HTML, CSS, and JS that accesses data from a public API while running on a single page and has three distinct event listeners. Racking my brain for some kind of project I could make, I scoured a list of APIs that I could potentially use hoping the idea would come to me. Scrolling through the enormous list I started to lose a little hope. How could I even get this to work anyway? None of these are jumping out at me as my idea of exciting or fun. Until I found an API that was simply a list of all the spells in Dungeons and Dragons 5th Edition. Being the nerd that I am, an idea sprang forth in my mind like a star bursting into existence. "What if I made an app that searches the spells?" Brilliant. Not original but hey that's not the point. It was *my* brilliance. After coming up with the idea it was time to start plotting out the basic ideas for the app. What would it fundamentally do? Now I'm pretty practical and methodical when it comes to coding. So I did the first thing I thought would make sense, write comments for every single thing the app is supposed to do! Things like "// Fetch data from API", " // Convert data to JSON", "// Store the results in spellArray" You get the idea. I even broke up the sections of the functionality with comments you'll see below like "//spell search" And to clarify I will be primarily talking about the javascript here as it is the main focus of this phase of the class.

After this, it was only a matter of writing the code for each bit of comment that made everything work. This is a gross oversimplification of course as it was about 95% of the task. But I digress.

And it worked! Against my own initial anxieties and doubts, I had a working searchable spell list! You can bet I was very ecstatic about this development. But of course, that was only one of the three event listeners I needed to satisfy the criteria. So I thought, "Okay so what can I do now?" and then it hit me again, another star created in the universe of my brain. Why not add a random spell button? Random things are fun and I could use a keyboard press event listener! So I did just that.

And again, another working piece of code. "Maybe I can do this after all.", I thought to myself. Two out of three down. The last one I will admit I got the idea from the instructions for adding a light and dark mode.

Okay done. It worked too. Only it wasn't exactly obvious that the light/dark mode button could be clicked. So I added a pointer.

And with that, I had four. But I wasn't satisfied there. I noticed something in my code. I had a redundancy for the API call. It was unnecessarily calling the API every time the spell was searched even if it was searched previously. So for example, if you searched "Fireball" you would get the results for Fireball from the API in a div. But if you were to search Fireball a second time, it would call the API again despite already having the data. I didn't like this. It's not like it was slow by any means but it would be just a little bit *faster* and more *streamlined*. Plus it cleaned the code up a bit. So I began by making a place for the spells to go locally:

Then, I had it check if the spell details had the spell or not, if not, it would make a call to the API:

If it did, then it would pull from the locally stored spell details instead.

And in order for this all to work I needed to create a function that searched for the spells.

Finally, I had it. The fastest (I think) possible DnD spell searcher I could make. And I thought back to how I felt before when I thought I couldn't do this and I was pretty happy about it.

You can see the finished product here and of course the GitHub link here.

#coding #programmer #developer #software engineering #coding projects #girls who code #software development #software developers #javascript #html #css #frontend #code #API

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shijiujun · 4 years

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WHY YOU SHOULD WATCH PSYCH HUNTER 心宅猎人

I AM BACK!!! WITH ANOTHER WHY YOU SHOULD WATCH!!!

You guys know how much I lurveeee Republican era crime thrillers whatever, so I bring y’all Psych Hunter! Set in the Republican era, this is a crime thriller thing that reminds me of 1. MRIAD A BIT with a quarter dose of 2. TLTR, and yes the best part of these three shows is the half bromance although it definitely isn’t AS pronounced here, but it certainly sweetens the deal of watching this.

Summary: Jiang Shuo is a feng shui master and real estate broker who can enter people’s psych (a bit like Sherlock’s mind palace, or maybe Inception-esque worlds in people’s consciousness), who gets arrested for real estate fraud across three people who died after buying the houses. He meets psychology expert and doctor Qin Yiheng, who is currently consulting with the police station on cases. There he also meets Yuan Muqing, a police officer who is great at martial arts. With his skill of ‘reading minds’ or actually ENTERING someone’s dream/mind scape, he can see what they’re trying to hide etc.

A year ago, Jiang Shuo woke up without any memories of who he was before, and he and his two new friends solve cases set in front of them by mastermind Liu Zhi (six fingers), as he also tries to get his memories back.

*The official summary also mentions that he was one of 7 people who entered a haunted house of sorts and was the only one to come out alive before he was found with all his memories lost.

Based on a novel called 凶宅笔记.

Total Eps: 36 | Playing on iQiyi offiically, but available on other usual sites I think

Why I like this:

If you like Republican era shows, this is definitely another one for you!! Plus case-solving, albeit a little different than usual

This is canonically het, i.e. Jiang Shuo is supposed to end up with Yuan Muqing, but the harmless and fun bromance between Jiang Shuo and Qin Yiheng is quite hilarious and nice to see - They hold hands A LOT (out of necessity) hahaha and when Jiang Shuo jokingly told Qin Yiheng that he looks better without glasses, the man really dumps his glasses HAHAHA

Did I also mention that Jiang Shuo looks cute af, and Qin Yiheng for all his sternness and bravado is a baby - Anyway they’re pretty nice to look at, way handsomer than they look in the poster

It has the same-ish setting as MRIAD, but the creepiness factor of TLTR every other episode, ERMMM a bit of The Nun vibes cuz there really is a nun in there for one of the cases, and zombies and weird shit (it’s a dreamscape so hahaha)

Cinematography/framing/shots aren’t half bad which I mean is actually pretty good, although they should work a tad bit on makeup and like props (a mirror was formed with aluminium foil YOU CAN LITERALLY SEE IT)

It’s not the most brilliant in terms of script or the cases, and some of the deductions made by QYH or the rest of the police force are, admittedly, pretty lame. But the focus I suppose is on the supernatural/inception part of it, which is pretty interesting.

I also regretted watching this at night hmmm

Characters:

1. Jiang Shuo

Smartass feng shui expert and real estate broker. Carries a string of coins and bells everywhere he goes. Amnesiac bb who is a little hot-headed but very intelligent, obviously dislikes Qin Yiheng on first sight (even though they meet while QYH is trying to save him), but sort of affectionately calls him Qin Er (as in the second Qin son). Has already fainted twice in the first two episodes, and gotten hurt in the third, I LIKE HOW THIS IS GOING. There’s quite a bit of whump for him hahaha.

Him and his coin thingys:

2. Qin Yiheng

He also went to Cambridge (against his dad’s wishes) and has an older brother. Is a doctor by degree and also psychologist by profession. Helping out with the police station now where he’s friends with the chief. He’s roped into this whole mess with Jiang Shuo for some reason by mastermind Liu Zhi as well, who has kidnapped his father. So in order to find out who Liu Zhi is and rescue his dad, he has to work together with Jiang Shuo.

If you watch this for like his deduction skills, you’re totally out of luck tho, that’s not the point of this show (and frankly the deduction is a bit sad), but he’s rich, dresses well, has an air about him, and has chemistry with Jiang Shuo hahaha.

His side-eye and almost eye-roll whenever he deals with JS:

And yes Jiang Shuo and Qin Yiheng forever bickering, but Qin Yiheng has already rescued Jiang Shuo twice, and also sat by his bedside while waiting for Jiang Shuo to wake up - Also a lot of hand holding while they’re in the dreamscapes

Cute buddies in crime:

3. Yuan Muqing

Aside from whoever chose to dub her and make her sound like a kid, her role in this one is pretty cute! Cool martial arts policewoman who crushes hard on Qin Yiheng first and then decides she actually likes Jiang Shuo more. Hot-headed too, but very likeable.

---

Anyway it’s a pretty light but thrilling show to watch so far!! Definitely not the most interesting in terms of cases, but the chemistry between the three characters above are pretty much on point! Plus the whole creepy factor and large conspiracy behind is definitely driving me to finish this. Banter between QYH and JS is great too hehe.

#心宅猎人 #psych hunter #jiang shuo #qin yiheng #yuan muqing #hou minghao #cdrama #drama rec

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pixiedurango · 4 years

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actual HELPFUL Skyrim mods

I’ve been wanting to post about modding my Skyrim experience for a while now. Only the sheer amount of installed and running mods made it an overwhelming endeavor which I couldn’t handle as we speak of 200+ mods as of today. Now I decided to break it down a bit to make it a reasonable post (or a bunch of) that might provide something helpful for the ones that - like me - love the casual game and attempt to find things that help me focusing on the story experience. (If any of you considers those to come cheating, probably it is but I do I and you do you and I wish you all the best. Bye.) I’m going to link to the nexus so everyone can find everything easily. (Also: Power and happiness to all the modders out there. You guys are awesome! 1. LockpickPro just as simple and functional as it sounds. Never want a game without it. I simply lack any patience of the vanilla lockpick system. Also saves a lot of perks you simply won’t have to invest into the lockpicking skills-tree.

2. Simply knock Have you ever known the struggle coming to a house at night, where the guy who sent you on a quest is sleeping and you have to wait for them to wake up? Or being a righteous character who has to get something from somewhere and the door is locked all the fucking time and you have to lockpick the door to get in do fulfill your quest? Worry no more. Simply knock and any friendly npc is most likely to get up and open the door for you whenever.

3. Barenziah Quest Markers Really Bethesda? 24 stones without a single clue? It’s like the equivalent to the dreaded shard search in Inquisition and it sucks just as much. I refuse to go without that markers anymore.

4. Convenient Horses I rarely do horse riding in Skyrim but when I do, I just don’t want my horsey to follow me everywhere through fast travel. Hence I use this handy mod to switch off that annoying feature.

5. Valuable merchants Simply rises the amount of gold to trade for up to 10.000 gold for every merchant in Skyrim.

6. soulgem crafting No link here because I obviously use a mod that is not to find anymore on the nexus and I can’t recommend any of the many current mods because I don’t know about how they work because they do different things than mine which basically just lets you upgrade soul gems at a forge y the ratio 2:1 - BUT I can highly recommend the Acquisitive Soul Gems Multithreaded mod that will prevent lesser/tinier souls to jump into your valuable grand/black soul gems. Each soul will only go into a fitting soul gem and I find this is very neat of them.

7. Run for your lives is a handy mod that makes civilians flee into their houses or seek shelter anywhere in case of a dragon attack instead of running into the way, getting themselves killed and involuntarily raising your dragonborn’s bounty.

8. Enchanters Merchant Sets up a merchant stand in Whiterun where you can buy every vanilla enchantment via random items. This is probably really close to cheating but getting started with enchanting early in the game is always essential for me so I know I can buy the “carry weight” and “fortify sneak” enchantment (and anything else that comes in handy) early on. Of course you’ll need some (a lot) gold so its not THAT easy peasy anyway.

9. Ars Metallica Smithing mod. I actually use one called smithing 2.0 which I can’t find on the nexus anymore (it seems to be available on the steam workshop though) but it does basically the same things so I think I might link this one here.

10. Armored mage robes I fairly often play mages and it always bugged me that their robes are not armored at all. So this mod fixed that. In the same light I love to use JS Armored Circlets because no matter what I play, warrior or mage, I HATE helmets... I mean I spend 5 hours in the CC what do you expect? Hiding my pretty baby under an ugly helmet? Nope, don’t think so.

11. Glowing Ore Veins 300 - Is a life (and time) saver for me. I think the ore’s glowing is super helpful without being too bright. But I remember before running this mod even in mines I had difficulties to find the ores to mine.

12. Arrow Conversion Spell - Is this cheating already? Maybe, but its actually super convenient to simply use a spell to upgrade all your arrows into the highest arrow class you have in your inventory. At some point you’ll end up with way too many arrows to ever use and you can go and sell them to make easy gold. I think most of them mods are pretty common and well known but maybe there are peeps out there who are still new to modding and can make some use of this. Also, if people have more recommendations in that light of usefulness, be my guest, reblog and ad.

Also check out my post about my favorite armor mods

#Skyrim #Skyrim mods #Skyrim modding #TES V #The elder srolls 5

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only-in-december · 3 years

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Chapter 3 of "I'M GOIN'..." is done! Here's the AO3 link. Or read it below. (...Or don't read it at all. I'm not your mother. Do what you want....but don't forget to brush your teeth. And get a decent amount of sleep. And brush your hair. And-)

I'M GOIN'... Chapter 3: "Friendship"

Danny went home after a couple long days in the hospital. He was glad to be home. The very first thing he did was run to his bedroom, jump onto his bed, and look up at the stars on his ceiling. He heaved a heavy sigh, naming the stars, looking for his favorite constellations. Maybe things would be back to normal soon.

He was just beginning to believe that things were still normal, that things were safe, when suddenly his arm fell through his bed. A yelp escaped him as he pulled his arm back out of the mattress. "Danny? Are you okay?" Jazz poked her head into his room, her eyebrows knit in concern. "Is something wrong?"

"Everything's fine Jazz." Danny scowled lightly and crossed his arms over his chest. He really hoped that she didn't see anything. "I just want some time alone if you don't mind."

"O–okay." Jazz's eyebrows somehow managed to knit together even tighter. "I'll leave you alone for a bit then." She looked a little hurt, and plenty worried. But Danny didn't really care. He was too caught up in his own panic, because as Jazz left the room, his legs both seemed to vanish.

He stopped himself from screaming, and tried to make his lower-half visible again. The issue was, that Danny didn't know how to control what was happening to him.

Danny was panicking. He changed. He was different. He wasn't himself anymore. There was a flash of white light, and then he was different. He could feel it. See it. And sense it all at once. And he didn't know how to change back.

He was practically touching the ceiling and curling in on himself because he was freaking out.

Then his bedroom door opened. And shut. So quickly he almost didn't notice. There in front of him stood Sam and Tucker, looking concerned.

Danny suddenly turned back to normal, and fell hard on his bed. His panic didn't die down though. "Guys! I….it...just"

"Danny, calm down. It's okay. We're here to help." Tucker sat on Danny's bed, and put a hand on his knee. "Best friends don't leave best friends to deal with sudden mutations on their own." Danny looked over at Sam who nodded her agreement.

"We're not going anywhere."

"W-what am I?" Danny's choice cracked. "I'm not–not completely human anymore. I can–I can tell. I can feel it when I change. So what am I?" Sam and Tucker shared a concerned look.

"We'll have to figure that out together." Tucker scooted closer to Danny, and elbowed him lightly. "I'm sure your parents have something that can tell us what's going on."

"Y-yeah. You're right." Danny nodded.

Tucker handed him a small acrylic pin. It looked like a classic alien head, and the bottom said 'out of this world.'

"I thought you were gonna stop with the pins for a while Tuck?"

"After everything that happened, I think this is a justified purchase." Tucker said with a shrug. "Plus Sam brought you a couple things too." Sam stuck her tongue out at Tucker before tossing a plastic shopping bag at Danny.

"Here. For your collection." Danny looked inside and saw four 'Ghostie Energy' cans in bright colors.

"Thanks. You guys rock." Danny smiled softly at his two best friends, and gave Tucker a half-hug. "Let me put these away, then we can raid the fridge downstairs."

Getting downstairs proved to be a slight challenge, when Danny's left leg suddenly fell through the second step. He almost fell all the way down, luckily Sam and Tucker had fast enough reflexes to catch him before any real damage was done.

Danny's parents were both in the kitchen working on some new project. It looked like a handheld computer of some kind. "Hey Dad, we're gonna get some snacks from the fridge and play some video games in the living room, okay?"

"Alright Danno. Just try not to make a mess okay?" Dad looked up from the blueprints he was studying.

"Sure thing Dad." Danny flashed a smile at his Dad as he opened the fridge up.

"Danny, could you Thank your friend for calling an ambulance for you after your accident, for me?" Mom had her goggles pulled down but Danny could still tell she was looking directly at him.

"Okay. Guys my mom says thanks." Danny said distractedly as he grabbed more snack foods from the cabinets.

"No, your other friend. The athletic one." Dad chimed in while writing a note.

"Athletic one?..." Danny almost dropped his armload of snacks when he realized who his parents were talking about. Then it hit him, he realized the one thing he had been trying not to think about. Kwan. Saw everything. Kwan saw what happened to him! "You mean Kwan?" Danny managed to choke out. "He's not really a friend. He was probably here looking for Jazz."

"Still. Make sure to thank him for us." Mom smiled sadly. "I don't know what we would have done if he hadn't called for an ambulance." She shuddered, and Danny nodded.

"Yeah okay." Danny nudged Tucker on the arm and handed him some of the snacks. "We'll be in the living room. We might head back upstairs in a little while though."

"Alright. You kids have fun!" Dad said, with a slightly distracted wave.

————————————

Meanwhile, Kwan tried not to think about everything that had happened at the Fenton's. Over the past few days he had been mainly attempting to pretend that it hadn't happened, and that he has been in no way involved. Although that didn't really happen, because The A-List inadvertently "adopted" Jazz into their group...at least tentatively.

Kwan looked up as Dash entered through his front door, dragging along a slightly confused looking Jazz. "Hey, Kwan." Dash tossed a football softly at him. "You wanna hang? The other girls already packed an entire picnic." Kwan couldn't help but grin at that.

"That sounds great actually. But, when did Star have the time to pack a picnic?" Kwan and Dash both knew that Paulina wouldn't pack anything herself unless she was forced to, and Val was absolute trash in the kitchen. Dash shrugged.

"No clue. 'Lina just called me about half an hour ago, and asked if we could all hang and have a picnic, I said sure, got Jazz, and now I'm grabbing you." Dash grinned as they started making their way toward their usual picnic spot in the park. (Luckily Kwan lived close by.)

As they reached the picnic spot the rest of the girls were all doing their own things. Star was weaving together flower crowns, Paulina was reading a fashion magazine, and Valerie was laying on her back on the picnic blanket, watching the clouds.

"Hey! Did we miss anything exciting?" Kwan skipped a little bit as they got closer.

"Nah. Star made PB&Js for everyone except 'Lina." Val said, sitting up to make room on the picnic blanket.

"No worries though! I made her a very nice sunflower butter and honey sandwich." Star dropped the flower crown she was working on and leaned over to hug Paulina.

"You guys do this kinda thing often then?" Jazz asked as she sat down.

"Not all the time, but whenever we get the chance." Kwan told her, he sat next to her and smiled. "How's your brother doing?" He didn't want to think about all the things that happened, but he did want to make sure that the Fentons were all doing alright.

"He's doing better, thanks for asking. He's back to kicking me out of his room, only talking to his friends. So that's a big plus." Jazz gave a half-hearted shrug.

"I'm so glad things are getting better!" Star beamed. "If you need anyone to talk to, you're welcome to talk with us." As if to prove her point, Star placed the crown she'd been working on, on top of Jazz's head.

Kwan looked over at Dash and Paulina, he knew those two worked hard to make sure the A-List was only the most popular kids in Casper High. Dash looked uneasy, and Paulina looked like she was working out who could possibly be bumped out of the group. While Jazz and Star kept talking about the picnic, Kwan pulled Dash and Paulina aside to discuss it.

"Guys. I think it's fine. We don't have to be an exclusive group. Plus, we all know that Jazz is cool. No one would question her hanging with us." Kwan kept his voice low.

"It's not her that we're concerned about." Dash admitted softly. "Her parents really take her down the social ladder." The football star sighed. "I just don't know if she's got enough to stand on her own in the social climate."

"Plus she's just a tad nerdy." Paulina wrinkled her nose. "We don't want nerds. That takes us from the A-List, to like… the F-List."

"Guys. She isn't that nerdy. Plus we've all needed her help with homework plenty of times." Kwan defended. "She's good at moving between social groups anyway. So we don't have to make her an official A-Lister. We just need to be open to talking with her in public." Dash and Paulina still looked unconvinced. "We have been hanging with her for the past few days already. We brought her along on a picnic for goodness sakes! Get a grip! We're the only ones who care about social standing!" It took everything in him not to yell. Kwan had to stop and take a deep breath, otherwise he might have snapped.

"Kwan. We can let her join peripherally. Anything more than that and...you know how it is." Dash held his hands up in surrender sign of mock surrender.

"Dash. You're my best friend. I would jump off a bridge for you." Kwan narrowed his eyes. "But if you're lying to me. If you don't put your best effort into making this work out. I'll step down and let her take my spot on the A-List." Kwan didn't know where this was coming from, but he did recognize that Jazz needed friends. Especially right now.

"I'll do my best. Let's get back to the picnic and have some fun." Dash lightly punched Kwan on the arm, and Kwan relaxed. He knew Dash would keep his word, he may have overreacted a bit.

@i-cant-go-ghost

#danny phantom #danny fenton #fanfic #jack fenton #information interception: a kwan au #in between fudge and needlepoint: a jack fenton au #Kwan #jazz fenton #dash baxter #star #paulina sanchez #valerie gray #the A-List

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intomymindspace · 4 years

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Like or Like Like ✰ Azumane Asahi

Like or Like Like by Miniature Tigers

azumane asahi x gn reader

Through the Summer and the Fall // Haikyuu!! Songfic Series

a/n: oya oya all 😌 welcome to my very first haikyuu fic! I started watching it after finishing season 3 of attack on titan and I um 🥺 love it 🥺 so this is what happens. I make a whole damn playlist about these boys. Anywayyyyys, here y'all are. The haikus used are ones I found on Pinterest by JS Parker - I did not write them and I do not own them so please don’t kill me, I can’t write good haikus for the life of me. Thank you once again for reading and taking the time to support me and my work. The next fic in the series will be Daddyichi!

Warnings: none other than asahi and his crippling shyness

It was the perfect summer weather for a beach day - and it was a perfect way to end a week’s worth of summer training. The beach was just a two hour drive from the school, and by the time the buses had arrived, it was only ten in the morning. As the Karasuno boys excitedly clambered out of the bus, they greeted players from the other schools and began pulling supplies to set up at the beach.

Asahi was too distracted by watching you through the bus window from below that Suga managed to hit him in the stomach, causing the tall brunette to double over, sputtering in surprise. “S-suga-san!” He was met with laughter from the silver-haired boy and their captain.

I watched you through your window

I was wearing that dumb sweatshirt

“Whatchya lookin’ at, Asahi-san?” His face immediately turned beet red, his eyes going wide as he realized how easily he was caught. “I - nothing! It’s just hot!” As Suga playfully hummed in response, Daichi slapped Asahi’s back hard.

“No wonder you look like a tomato! I can’t believe you’re wearing that right now.” He looked down at the ivory-colored sweater you had knit him as a gift from the previous Christmas. Even while Daichi had a knowing smile on his lips, Asahi wore a slight frown. “Hey, I happen to like it.” Their response was a cohesive snicker.

“Just don’t forget to take it off later.” Suga said, winking. “Now hurry up, let’s get all the stuff set up.”

I looked like a goon, I was dressed for winter

Even though it was the middle of June

Once everything had been set up on the beach, everyone got down to business making sure that they wouldn’t get sunburnt. Asahi’s eyes were wide as he caught you pulling your shirt off and shimmying your shorts off to reveal your swimsuit. You were happily chatting with Kiyoko and Yachi as they had just done the same - and he couldn't help but stare. You looked really cute in your swimsuit. As your head popped up, your eyes came into contact with his, and you gave him a wide smile without any hesitation.

He had been caught staring at you again! By no one other than yourself - yet he managed to send a nervous smile back to you before whipping his head away so that you hopefully wouldn’t notice how red his face looked.

“Oya, Azumane-san, you’re looking a bit red. Are you sick?” It was Kuroo who asked him - Nekoma’s tent being right next to Karasuno’s made it easy for the captain to see what was going on. At this point, it was fairly obvious to many players that Asahi had a thing for you. Asahi responded with a quick “I’m fine!” but it was clear to see that he was flushed because of you. They were all talking in a small group with Daichi, Suga, and Bokuto - and the boys smiled at each other deviously.

I watched you get undressed

I must have turned bright red

“Maybe you should go offer to help them put on some sunscreen, Azumane-san~” they didn't think Asahi could get even more red, but he did.

“What! Why?” Asahi immediately spun again to find you lathering up the front of your body - it seemed Kiyoko was too busy helping Yachi while being hounded by Nishinoya and Tanaka.

“Well, if you won’t, I certainly will! I gotta beat the crowd!” Asahi was going to get whiplash if he kept moving his neck that fast - it had been Bokuto who proclaimed that, an owlish grin on the boy’s face. Crowd? Asahi questioned himself - only to have it answered when he noticed a few other boys from Nekoma and Fukurodani begin to walk over in your direction. As Kuroo and Bokuto followed, his eyes turned into slits - Daichi and Suga could practically see the dark aura that was radiating off the ace’s skin.

'Cause I couldn't stand to face you

'Cause I liked what I saw

Asahi felt another jab into his side, waking him from his jealousy. He looked up to find mom and dad staring at him, an expecting look in their eyes.

“Fine! Just because I don’t want them to do it…” he practically sprinted towards you.

You were already being bombarded by boys asking if they could help you - but with a friendly smile, you turned all of them down again and again. Out of all the voices, you turned your head to find Asahi had called your name as he stepped beside you and Bokuto behind him with a pout on his face. Asahi tried his best to keep his blush to a minimum, but he wished you didn’t look as cute as you did - mainly for his own sake.

“Wou-would you like me to help you? Get your behind?” his eyes widened. “I mean - your back. Your back. I put sunscreen on your back.” He cursed himself internally - why did he have to be a stuttering mess all the time? Especially in front of you.

And maybe we should just stay friends

Asahi only blushed harder as you smiled widely at him, handing him the bottle of sunscreen you were using.

“Thank you Sahi-kun!” Could the poor ace get any more red? He simply nodded as you turned your back towards him. Moving the sleeves of his sweater as high as possible, he squirted sunscreen into one of his hands. He smirked as he heard the sad groans and sighs as the group of boys walked away in defeat.

“Oh, wait!” You immediately turned around just as he was rubbing his hands together. Worried, his eyes widened. Did you not want him to do it anymore? He immediately heard a few footsteps from behind him change direction.

“You should take off your sweater before you get - oh!” You laughed as you found the tall boy staring at you with both his hands covered in sunscreen.

“Here, Sahi-kun - I’ll help you take it off.” He heard another round of defeated sighs.

Tell me how you feel about me

Do you like or like, like me?

“Nononono! It’s okay! I’ll be fine, you don’t need to do that!” He was surprised by your forwardness, but passed it off as you being helpful.

“Don’t be silly! It’ll be awful to wash off - especially since I made it for you~” Asahi gulped as you said that, simply nodding his head at the speed of light. He felt like his ears were turning red as he felt the tips of your fingers brush against his abdomen as you grabbed the bottom of his sweater - you took it off him with ease, avoiding getting the sleeves covered in sunscreen. He couldn’t believe that you were undressing him. Folding it quickly and putting it in your bag for safekeeping, you turned your back towards him again, trying not to ogle his well-defined body.

Tell me what you really feel

Do you like me? Just say you do

Your skin felt so soft - even under his rough, calloused fingers. He had never touched you this intimately - despite you being very close friends with him. Perhaps it was because he had only given you shoulder massages when you had more clothes on - he immediately tried to block out any thoughts relating to your body. But it was hard! He was crushing on you so badly, and all he wanted was to appreciate and love all of you.

Love. It was a word he was quite familiar with when it came to you - and immediately he was once again struck with more anxiety. The love letter he had in his pocket last night had gone missing.

I climbed up your front porch

And I doorbell ditched ya

Asahi breathed in and out very deeply as he paced in front of the managers’ room. Psyching himself up, he stopped and knocked at the door. He felt the letter sticking out of his jacket pocket - it may have been as light as a crow’s feather, but it felt like a forty pound dumbbell. He perked up, and his eyes widened as he heard your voice from the other side of the door.

“Coming! One second!” His panic immediately began to set in - and he had no other choice but to flee. He couldn’t confess without the fear of blacking out - it didn't matter how many times he had practiced giving the letter to Suga. Little did he know that the letter had fallen as he ran.

And I felt so bad, couldn't cope to what I did

So I laughed myself sick all the way to my car

When you opened the door, you found no one there - you had thought it was probably one of the boys pranking you, but that was until you saw a small envelope a few feet away. Walking towards it, you saw that it had your name written on it as you picked it up. You let out a small hum as you walked back into the room.

“Is that what I think it is?” Kiyoko asked you, seeing the envelope in your hand as the other closed the door.

“I’m not sure - but let's find out!”

Tell me how you feel about me

Do you like or like, like me?

It was two simple haikus - and to make the guessing game even harder, there wasn’t a name.

I think of you, and

dream about you, in colors

that do not exist.

I’m choking on words

too scared to say: I love you.

I’ll tell you this way.

The eloquently written words made a blush rise to your cheeks as you wondered who could’ve possibly written it.

Tell me what you really feel

Do you like me? Just say you do

You were watching the boys play mixed matches of beach volleyball. Trying to keep your eyes off of Karasuno’s ace, you thought about who could’ve left you the love letter.

“Do you know who it is?” It was Yachi that had asked you, but you shook your head and she let out a small huff. “Do you have any hunches?” It was Kiyoko who asked the next question.

“Not at all! I don’t even know who it could’ve been! There are so many boys here, and so many have talked to me this week.”

“Maybe it’s Bokuto-san! Or maybe - ”

“Do you think it’s someone from Karasuno?” Your cheeks immediately tinted at the question.

“I don’t know,” you answered quietly. “But I hope so.” Your eyes immediately trailed back to Asahi, who was serving. The concentrated look in his eyes and the way his tanning skin glistened in the summer sun made a heavy blush rise to your cheeks. Little did you know that Suga had been listening in on your conversation from the sidelines - and he caught the way you looked at the ace.

Tell me how you feel about me

Do you like or like, like me?

“Oi, Dai-san! We need a plan.” When Asahi went to the bathroom during the late lunch, the captain immediately called for a team huddle. Daichi laid out a simple plan - one that required the team to make sure that no one was near the two of you.

“Will it work!?”

“Tch, it seems simple enough.”

“I can’t believe he still hasn’t done anything. It’s been at least two years.”

“We execute at sunset.”

Tell me what you really feel

Do you like me?

It was nearing sunset, and Yachi and Kiyoko had left you in the waist-high water to grab some water - and you could hear the voices of boys playing soccer on the shore. Just as the sun was beginning to set, the warmth began to dissipate as well - the ocean breeze not helping. While you wanted to get out of the water, you wanted to watch the sky change colors for just a little while longer. Kiyoko had taken your towel and Asahi’s sweater, which was still tucked away in your bag next to hers. Going up to Asahi, she quickly nudged the items into his hands, his face riddled in confusion.

“This is your time to go confess, Asahi-san. You can do it.” Asahi felt a blush creep up to his cheeks as his eyes glossed over. In the background, he could hear his teammates shoot tears from their eyes - not expecting her encouraging words to be a part of the plan. Maybe he had the strength to do it with his team cheering him on! With determination in his eyes, and a warm smile on his lips, Asahi slipped on the sweater and began walking towards you.

Tell me how you feel about me

Do you like or like, like me?

You heard your name being called out from behind you, and you turned to find Asahi standing at the edge of the water, your towel draped over his shoulder. Wading out of the water, you walked up to him as he gave you your towel to dry off.

“Thank you, Sahi-kun.” He still blushed at the endearment every time it fell from your lips - ever since you started calling him that as first years.

“Would… would you like to watch the sunset together?” He almost sighed in relief when you nodded - and you two walked a bit further away from the water. Setting down the towel, you both sat on top of it, your arms encircling your knees as your toes dug into the sand, Asahi leaning back, resting his weight on his arms.

You both sat in a comfortable silence as the sun slowly lowered, colors spreading across the sky and mixing beautifully. While you stared at the view in front of you, the only thing worth looking at in Asahi’s eyes was you. He was enraptured by the way the fading light was striking your features in every possible perfect angle, the way your hair moved slightly with the breeze, and the way you shivered slightly at the ocean’s chill.

Tell me what you really feel

Do you like me? Just say you do

His eyes widened - you were cold! His primal man instincts told him to warm you up, but his shy and gentle nature told him to abort mission - so Asahi compromised, and he immediately sat up and removed his sweater before drawing your attention away from the view.

“You must be chilly - please take my sweater.” There was a look in his eyes that you couldn't quite read properly, but nonetheless, you took the sweater from his hands and slipped it on, immediately being warmed by his radiating body heat. Trying not to ogle at his bare chest again, you decided to scoot closer towards him - so close to the point that your legs and arms rubbed against each other. You both kept your eyes on the sunset, pink dusting both your cheeks.

Asahi stayed sitting up, his hand pressing against the surface behind you so that he could stay close to your body. He couldn't resist the temptation to keep looking at you - and he strangely felt confident enough to have no shame in doing so. The way his oversized sweater somehow fit on your smaller figure so perfectly - draping over your shoulders and ending perfectly above the middle of your thighs. The sight of you in his sweater made his face flush, as it was a sight that left him wanting more of you in every single way.

“I think of you, and dream about you, in colors that do not exist.” His voice was low and soft as he recited the words from the love letter he had meant to give you. Your eyes widened in realization - it was no one other than Asahi himself who had written the letter. Looking at him, you continued the haiku, much to his surprise.

“I - I’m choking on words too scared to say,” you recited, your heart beating out of your chest. Those words had been scorched into your mind since the night before. Asahi let out a small gasp before realizing that he must have dropped the letter - this whole time he had been worried that someone had stolen it. He said your name, his voice barely above a whisper.

“I love you.” Both of you were blushing messes, but he knew it was his opportunity to shine. As he began to close the space between both your faces, he recited the last line, his lips so dangerously close to yours. “I’ll tell you this way.”

As his lips touched yours for just a mere second, he pulled away to look into your eyes. You knew from the look in his eyes that he was asking if you wanted more - if you wanted him to be yours. You met him halfway to the kiss - and your lips felt like they were lighting on fire as they moved with his. Asahi moved his idle hand to cup just below your jaw - his fingertips dancing at the nape of your neck as his thumb traced your jaw. He felt the way you melted into his hand and lips like you were chocolate. Before going deeper into the kiss, Asahi pulled away, his forehead gently nudging yours as his breathing deepened.

“Will you… be mine? If you’ll have me?” You looked into his mocha eyes to find that the unreadable look he had been giving you all this time was one of pure love. Asahi waited for your response - his heart hammering away in his chest. You smiled brightly, unable to control your happiness as you lunged to hug him, your arms wrapping around his warm torso.

“Of course I will.”

Thank you for reading!

~ Crystal :3

through the summer and the fall series masterlist

blog masterlist

buy me a ko-fi (but only if you can and want to)!

BONUS

The bus ride back to Karasuno was quiet - the boys were exhausted, most of them sleeping or keeping to themselves with soft conversations. You had fallen asleep rather quickly - your head resting comfortably in Asahi’s warm chest as his arms were wrapped around you - the ace using his jacket as a makeshift pillow for his head between the seat and the window.

Suga giggled sweetly as he took out his camera to snap a few photos of Karasuno’s new power couple cuddling on the bus, wrapped in each other’s embrace. He made sure to keep them to show his future godchildren.

#asahi x reader #Asahi Azumane x reader #asahi imagine #Asahi Azumane imagine #asahi reader insert #Asahi Azumane reader insert #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu reader insert #intomymindspace

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moon-stars01 · 4 years

Text

~Call Me Beep Me~

Hoshi x Reader

Author:prkjimin

Summary:Kwon Soonyoung does not know how to text

Pairing:Soonyoung(Seventeen) x Reader

Gene:fluff,friends to lovers,texting

Rating:General Audiences

Word Count:1147

Call Me Beep Me

kwon soonyoung, y/n learns, does not know how to text.

and maybe that's a little unfair to say, because soonyoung does know how, if his endless list of conversations dating to a year ago say anything. he just isn't very good at it.

he doesn't understand the careful etiquette of texting; replying too late to time sensitive messages and abusing emojis, sending multiple texts all on different subjects in the span of four minutes.

he also, for whatever god forsaken reason, decided at some point autocorrect wasn't a necessary, resulting in messages more often than not being a scrambled incoherent mess that leaves y/n guessing if soonyoung’s piss drunk somewhere or just typing too quickly (it's the latter, most of the time.)

Y/n’s phone buzzes one night as she’s trying -- and failing miserably -- to cram a unit’s worth of biology into her deteriorating brain, turning it to mush inside her skull.She nearly pounces on her

phone, welcoming the distraction with open arms until she sees the mess of letter on her screen and soonyoung’s contact name (which consists of the elders initials and an onslaught of star emojis that he just won't let y/n change).

She almost sighs when she swipes the message open, wondering if decoding her oppa’s message would cause more of a headache then trying to teach herself biology.

Ksy

10:27pm

Momdy!! r u fiished work???

Y/n furrows her eyebrows, wondering if her dysphericing skills are lacking or if soonyoung had just referred to her as “mommy”

Y/n

10:27pm

what

She sends back simply, throwing her phone back onto her bed because she knows soonyoung won't bless her another response for at least twenty minutes, turning back to her heavy textbook reluctantly.

to her surprise, her phone goes off again less than two minutes later.

ksy

10:29pm

oh lol ur nt my mother

ksy

10:29pm

ur nubmers r the sam but differnet

Y/n huffs a little airy laugh, unsurprised at the mix up between contacts because she’s pretty sure soonyoung has still yet to save a single number apart from the local pizza delivery.

before y/n can type a response however, her phone is buzzing again, the younger slightly surprised at how active soonyoung is.

ksy

10:30pm

but if u send me mkney for allowencd u could b my mommy;)

Y/n nearly chokes when she reads over the message, going through it a third and fourth time just to ensure this isn't a stroke or hallucination, half convinced now that this is one of the rare occasions that soonyoung’s drunk and his brain is beginning to seize function when she realizes she's read it correctly.

Y/n

10:32pm

oh ya that's me, ur two year younger bdsm sugar mommy dom who's actually a whole infant

is what she ends up sending in response, deciding to go along with soonyoung’s joke somewhat because she doesn't wanna be that girl who can't platonically joke around about being in sexual relationships with her friends.

again, soonyoung's response is surprisingly fast and y/n has to wonder if the elder had possibly been waiting for her text.

ksy

10:34pm

smh no bdsm mommy’s here

and then,

ksy

10:34pm

i'd settle for some vanilla kisses with you though

it's the lack of misspellings that really gets y/n, picturing soonyoung sitting on his couch, or floor, or bed or wherever and deliberately pressing each letter in order, words joining together to create a sentence with some sort of intentions that y/n isn't sure of just yet, unsure if she actually wants to know.

Y/n

10:37pm

lmao are you feeling okay??

the younger sends, only a little less concerned for her own well being as she finds herself reading soonyoung’s messages again. maybe he'd gotten his phone stolen, or maybe y/n’s being pranked. there's a million motives that could be lingering behind soonyoung’s messages besides real, actual mutual interest in y/n so she tries not to let herself get too invested.

ksy

10:40pm

ofc

ksy

10:40pm

got a little 2 confident behind an innocent joke n accidently exposed how i felt, ooPs

Y/n frowns at this, confused as to what soonyoung’s implying as another hundred scenarios whirl through her brain.

Y/n

10:41pm

what do you mean?

ten minutes go by without a response and y/n almost screams when she hears her phone go off, unlocking it quickly to reveal soonyoung’s message because she's almost driven herself insane trying to conjure up a reason.

ksy

10:53pm

i just mean that i genuinely do like u but i approached it w a joke which leads this to b weird now lol

Y/n wishes she could describe the feeling in her stomach as anything other than a violent, rumbling hurricane of emotion but she can't as she slaps either hand over her steadily warming cheeks, barely aware she's squeaking until the sound echoes back into her own ears.

her hands are shaking as she types a careful response, rewording it twice before finally bringing herself to hit send and then she's hovering over her device like a hawk, jumping at every sound and cursing at every instagram notification.

Y/n

10:55pm

i really hope you aren't fucking with me bc i actually like you soonyoung and it’ll be really uncool if you're just doing this for a laugh js

ksy

11:00pm

is that how lowly you think of me? ouch :( </3

ksy

11:00pm

i really do like you y/n l/n

at this y/n jumps into the call app, typing soonyoung’s number easily -- because she's good at remembering things and not because she's spent so many hours staring at the other’s contact okay? -- and biting her lip a little harder at each rhythmic ring until soonyoung answers.

“kwon residence, how may i help you?” he answers, cheery and perky like he hadn't just flipped y/n’s entire world on its head.

“you're an asshole ,” y/n breathes, laughing in almost disbelief and then there's an echo of an equally pleased laugh, light and innocent that sends y/n's heart soaring.

“oh man, you could have warned me if you were just calling to verbally abuse me over the phone,” soonyoung jokes and y/n can practically hear the pout in his voice.

“it’s due diligence, you almost gave me a heart attack. how could you of all people think it's a good idea to confess over text?” Y/n squawks but she's still smiling brightly, giddy at the realization that this is real.

“in my defence, i had a really good speech prepared with a little love letter and all, but you were going along with the joke so i got ahead of myself.” soonyoung says, clearing his throat a little before y/n has a chance to reply, and then;

“are you down for some vanilla making out right now?”

Y/n can only yell in response.

#seventeen #seventeen fanfic #seventeen fluff #kpop fanfic #kwon soonyoung #hoshi #hoshi scenarios #hoshi fanfic #kpop oneshots

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gnostic-heretic · 4 years

Note

Hi! I'd love for you to respond to this, but ONLY if you're comfortable! I'm planning on writing a hetalia fanfic with a trans character. I researched a bit, but I feel that my fic could be read as problematic: my trans character (MTF) is introduced as her assigned gender with a different name, only to be uncovered later. She dates pre transition, but get back together. Is this realistic? You've written fic w/ trans characters before, so can you give any tips of advice? Thank you for reading!

hey dear, thank you for reaching out! i’m more than comfortable giving advice but remember that i’m just one trans person, so this does not represent a consensus- i encourage you to reach out to a trans friend to do a sensitivity reading, if you and your friend are comfortable with that!

i say this because a lot of people would say this scenario of portraying someone pre- and post-transition is a no-no, but i think it’s doable (i’ve done it myself!) if approached in a sensible way.

and yes i do think it’s possible for a character to date someone, break up for unrelated reasons, transition and then meet that person again and fall in love again. it’s a sweet idea! it’d be lovely to see your character grow and be more content and confident and finally *herself*, and find love as herself :) plus at least in my experience, a lot of cis partners of trans people do a lot of serious questioning and self exploration when their partner comes out so it can be interesting from the other character’s perspective as well. i’ve seen for example many gfs/wives of trans women realize they’re wlw when they previously never questioned their sexuality. so it can be an interesting journey for both characters to go on and for you as a writer to explore!

my first bit of advice is to read read and read. read what trans people have to say on the subject of writing- i know there’s more than one post floating around on tumblr with advice for cis people on how to write a trans character. and read the experiences of trans people, how they talk about their own “egg cracking” (if you don’t know, i’d start by searching what “cracking your egg” means- and hint: it’s not always “i played with dolls as a child”), transition and their own past present or their future plans. and as you read remember that there is no singular standard “trans experience”- transition is not linear, and there’s no such thing as a transition that is “complete” or “incomplete”. some trans people feel really intense dysphoria, others don’t and are mostly fine with the body they have. some trans people want to start hrt asap and to have every medical procedure available, for others, coming out is enough, in many cases they might want to have surgeries, but hormones are the only thing that’s accessible because of the cost of surgeries and long waiting lists.

keep in mind that everyone experiences gender in their own unique way, so a trans female character doesn’t have to be hyper feminine, and a trans male character doesn’t have to be super masculine to be “good representation”.

also i’d say to read up on harmful tropes to avoid as well, i’m gonna tell you some just off the top of my head and offer advice on how to handle tricky subjects - portraying trans people especially trans women as violent or predatory/creepy is a big NO (i know this might be obvious to you, but this is also for everyone else reading this out there). there’s nothing wrong with writing negative or morally grey characters but this is a damaging and dehumanizing trope with a long history of being used as propaganda against us.

- on the same note i’d say to avoid portraying your character as easily offended, overly sensitive, quick to anger etc etc. another (more modern) trope used to mock and ultimately harm trans people is to paint us as “special snowflakes”

--> a good thing to remember is that anger can be portrayed as righteous, as it is in this situation, and assertive so that would be a good place to start if you have to write about the character being rightfully angry and sad, upset at discrimination she might experience.

- avoid the dramatic scene in which a character is found out to be trans by undressing them and “revealing” something about their body. also tied to transphobic ideas (trans people “trick” people into thinking they are their gender) and to trans panic defense that legitimizes the murder of trans people.

--> a good way to reveal that your character is trans is... simply to make her come out. have a talk! there’s so many possibilities from it being heavy and awkward, to light hearted and heartwarming :)

- this one is a more complicated thing to handle, because i know some will disagree with me on it... but i’d advise you to steer away or ask for a second opinion/sensitivity reader if you’re gonna write The Sad Mirror Scene TM in which a trans person gazes at their own body in the mirror (or even without the mirror tbh) and points out everything that is “male/female” about it. personally i think it’s bad but in a more subtle way... the focus on our bodies and everything that is considered “wrong” with it can have creepy or outright transphobic implications. also it’s way overdone js

--> instead of the long gazing scene i’d mention those things in passing and incorporate them into her daily life, because it is something we live with every day and not just in all-at-once intense dysphoria sessions: maybe she has broad shoulders, so she wears a cute blouse with a lot of ruffles to conceal that a bit; or maybe she’s out and about, on the way to her laser hair removal appointment, and feels awkward about having a bit of shadow (so she treats herself to buying a new concealer on the way home);

--> also don’t forget about small moments of gender euphoria and trans joy!!! so maybe she gets a new haircut after growing her hair out for a long time, or takes her estrogen for the first time and cries of happiness, or she tries on her fave bra and notices that her breasts have grown a little bit or they feel sore which is a good sign!. etc etc. these are just examples so don’t sweat it :D but showing the happiness that comes with being trans and not just the sadness of it is really important imo for everyone thinking about writing a trans-centric story

- in general i’d be careful for anything that implies trans people aren’t “really” the gender they are, or that deep down we’ll always be our assigned gender. sometimes it’s not the outright essentialist statements but the more subtle things that can go undetected to cis people, but we see them. stuff like: the character deadnaming/misgendering themselves (so for example, when she comes out, no “remember deadname?”, or, “i used to be a man”) equating genitals with gender (even as a joke), or making the cis experience out to be universal (that feel when pms, am i right ladies? :) <-- this kind of statement even in good intentioned fun can feel exclusionary and should be perceived as such by your character), body shaming or implying certain non-conforming characteristics (ex: a strong jawline, broad shoulders, narrow hips, small breasts on a woman) are inherently “bad” or inherent to trans people only (plenty of cis women have all of those above listed things).

--> i know that dysphoria can make these last things appear to be inherently negative to the person, but you might counterbalance this by making her confident about other aspects of her personality, and making your other characters compliment her and paint her insecurities in a new light. for example she might feel self conscious about her height, but maybe her love interest loves her beautiful, long legs; or maybe more simply unrelated to anything she’s insecure about, she’s smart and hard working, she’s a science genius, she’s the best of her judo class and could kick your ass, she has really nice hair, or really striking eyes, or a very pretty color of very chipped nail polish. details are the key!!! and remember that value and beauty are subjective!!!!

and last but most important of all... please write your character as HUMAN!! we trans people are just regular people, like anyone else in the world. we aren’t just defined by transness, we have lives and passions and talents and our own problems completely unrelated to being trans. so please keep that in mind while writing your gal! and don’t let everything i’ve typed above intimidate you, most of it is obvious stuff and i’m sure you’ll be fine! good luck with your story!

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hayingsang · 4 years

Text

What I read in 2020

2020 wasn’t a vintage year for reading. I only finished 66 books – my lowest count in recent years – and I didn’t discover anything startlingly new. But I was pleased that for the second year in a row half the books I read were by women and that I came close to hitting my target of six books in Chinese. I would have hit my Chinese target if I hadn’t started a 600-page book in October, but as that’s already going to be one of the top books of 2021, I’m not too upset about missing that goal.

Upping my Chinese reading was probably part of reason for the low overall count – one page typically takes around 10-15 minutes – though also responsible was over-reading during two weeks in home quarantine in March put me off books for a while.

As usual, I mainly read older books – ones not released in 2020 – and for once the amount of fiction I read comfortably exceeded the non-fiction. Of that fiction the highlights were Lydia Davis’s Collected Stories, Angela Carter’s Heroes and Villains and the second volume of The Plum in the Golden Vase.

Davis’s work is short – often very short (many of her tales are less than a page). Prose poetry? Sometimes, but not always. A lot of playfulness. But also with a power that builds as you keep reading, a few pieces one day, a few more the next, and the one after, and so on. Also her repeated determination to experiment, sometime using traditional forms, sometimes with new ones.

Carter’s book, from the late 1960s, moved through much the same collapsed-society territory as Margaret Atwood’s The Year of the Flood, but far more elegantly and to a more satisfying ending. I didn’t like her fairy stories, but this was tremendous.

The Plum in the Golden Vase, Volume Two: The Rivals – as good as the first volume. Better maybe. The best sprawling novel ever?

Aeschylus’s The Oresteia was another standout – read following last year’s Aeneid and Odyssey after consulting Richard Jenkyns’ excellent Classical Literature (an invaluable source of recommendations about what to read from Greece and Rome). No surprise that Aeschylus’s work has survived two-and-a-half millennia with its poking around matters that still bother human beings (families, states, etc).

Of the various books I read on Hong Kong, Kong Tsung-gan’s Liberate Hong Kong: Stories from the Freedom Struggle was the one I found most satisfying. Partly for its exploration of some of the darker, more violent aspects of 2019’s protests, but most of all for capturing the importance of what happened and so why it will be hard for the forces of repression to succeed in the long run. The only problem with this book is that it now seems to be almost impossible to get hold of.

Of the five books I read in Chinese, my favourite was in Cantonese (and so arguably not in Chinese): 麥花臣金將軍與白龍的對談 by 並明. An extraordinary piece of work, mainly about two young men from Hong Kong in Oxford talking about Hong Kong and philosophy, but also including voluminous footnotes on matters such as why certain characters had been chosen to represent words used in Cantonese that don’t occur in standard Chinese. If you have any interest in Cantonese I would say it’s a must-read – it’s the first time I’ve come across a sustained piece of writing using Cantonese as it’s spoken.

I also enjoyed 像我這樣的一個女子 by 西西 (Xi Xi, A Girl Like Me). I had read a couple of her books in English, and thought they were so-so. Actually, the problem was the translation. In English, her stories look simple; in Chinese, even I can tell that there’s a lot more going on, even if I’m not sure what it is.

What pointed me to Lydia Davis was her translation of Swan’s Way, my third version. My first reading was in 1984, when I thought it was amazing. Then, after reading the first two or three books, I decided to save the rest for some special occasion. That never came, so in the early 2000s, I read those first few books for a second time – again finding them amazing. This time round, however, I was rather less compelled. I enjoyed it, but didn’t care for it. I’m now thinking I will never get round to finishing the whole thing.

The list in full:

Anita Brookner, A Friend from England

Peter Gray, Free to Learn

Richard Baldwin, The Globotics Upheaval

Stendhal, Scarlet and Black

Anita Brookner, Latecomers

Daniel H Wilson, Robopocalypse

Tim Jackson, Prosperity Without Growth

並明, 麥花臣金將軍與白龍的對談

Anonymous, Bhagavad Gita

Erik Brynjolfsson & Andrew McAfee, The Second Machine Age

Wang Anyi, Love in a Small Town

Nina Bawden, Walking Naked

Anita Brookner, Family and Friends

Anita Brookner, A Start in Life

Angela Carter, Heroes and Villains

Gerald Graff & Cathy Birkenstein, “They Say, I Say”

Mario Vargas Llosa, The Neighborhood

Marcel Proust, Swan’s Way

Ruth Kassinger, Slime

Erik Brynjolfsson & Andrew McAfee, Machine, Platform, Crowd

Aeschylus, The Oresteia

Stanley SK Kwan, The Dragon and the Crown

陶傑, 香港政局的50個關鍵詞

CS Lewis, The Horse and His Boy

Felicia Nay, Red Affairs, White Affairs

Anonymous, The Plum in the Golden Vase, Volume Two: The Rivals

Julia Lovell, The Opium War

Various, Aftershock

Bruce Aitken, The Cleaner

青永屍, 你個教育制度壞咗呀

Kong Tsung-gan, Liberate Hong Kong

Jeanette Winterson, Why Be Happy When You Can Be Normal

Octavia Butler, Bloodchild and Other Stories

Deborah Levy, The Unloved

Daniel Levitin, The Organized Mind

Elias Canetti, The Play of the Eyes

Martha Nussbaum, The Monarchy of Fear

Jeffrey Wasserstrom, Vigil

Ursula Le Guin, The Farthest Shore

西西, 像我這樣的一個女子

Ursula Le Guin, Tehanu

Lydia Davis, The Collected Stories of Lydia Davis

Antony Dapiran, City of Protest

Stendhal, The Charterhouse of Parma

Audre Lorde, Sister Outsider

Lydia Fitzpatrick, Lights All Night Long

Michael Taylor, Community, Anarchy, Liberty

Jean Rhys, Quartet

Toni Morrison, Home

Ursula Le Guin, The Telling

Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning

譚劍, 人形軟件

Adair Turner, Between Debt and the Devil

Amos Oz, Judas

JS Sharman, The Despot’s Guide to Wealth Management

Ursula Le Guin, Tales of Earthsea

Ursula Le Guin, The Other Wind

Ursula Le Guin, The Dispossessed

Felix Dennis, How to Get Rich

Martha Nussbaum, Woman and Human Development

Alice Munro, Dear Life

Sally Rooney, Normal People

David Grossman, To the End of the Land

Natalia Ginzburg, All Our Yesterdays

Margaret Atwood, The Year of the Flood

Charles Taylor, Hegel

#books

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the-faeryqueen · 4 years

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E vening bby✨ I beed some guidance 😩🙏🏽 Im stuck in a fork in the road with 2 amazing very different yet similar men these gentleman who both desire my heart however one more than the other!! Im so stuck in making the wrong choice:( help guide should I continue towards my intellectual Virgo JR or my genuinely inspiring Leo MV Ahhhh SOS Ty & the stars bb🥰✨ JS SCORPIO ♏️ ☀️ & 🌚 Libra ♎️ Rising

Hi lovely! 🧚‍♀️💖

Ooh boy was this an interesting reading.

I felt a tight feeling in my chest while doing this (despite my general mood being stable right now and me being grounded with cleared energy), so I feel like you should definitely take a breather first! This is clearly a matter close to your heart, and honestly I've been in your shoes.

So let's get right into it!

Should you move towards JR?

I got Inner Child and Life Energy

Should you move towards MV?

I got Moon Energy and Flourish

Now before I interpret these let me say I was struck by how much these give me sun and moon energy! I love to look at colors and imagery in my readings and I mean just look at these cards next to each other.

I couldn't help but think of the Chinese drama I've been watching on Netflix called Ashes of Love, where the main character is in a love triangle between the night God or the fire God. I haven't finished the show, but perhaps it may have some clues or be of interest to you.

(Shameless character input here, perhaps your two love interests resemble their characters in some way)

Now here I thought, well, maybe this color scheme may be coincidence? Oh sugarplums was I wrong. This color scheme followed throughout the entire oracle reading! It definitely has a significance to show. Let me know if this resonates with you cause I'm intrigued by it!

Alright now that I'm done gawking haha, here's your whole spread. Top Row is JR and bottom row is MV.

We'll start with JR. 🌄🌻🦨☀️🔥💛

I feel like he lifts you up! I mean this metaphorically but I am feeling these may be literal too haha. He is likely silly and fun, and perhaps a little protective of you.

We have Skunk Spirit here and look at him, he's on this yellow Daisy here that is really reminding me of a sunflower and sunny energy. It says here "know your worth". If you don't already, you definitely should! That said, I'm feeling this person really does know how much you're worth and respects your real and true authentic self. If something isn't sitting right with you, now is the time for honesty. Remember who you are and what really matters to you and act with integrity.

Next we have Energy Field Adjustment: Aura cleansing and health.

Are you loving and taking care yourself? Does this person bring you happiness or leave you feeling drained? Pay attention to your health and how you energetically feel around this person. This will help you decide. Your body, mind, spirit, and emotions always have answers for you.

Again with this card I was drawn to this orb of light that looks like the sun. The mermaid is looking down at it, so I feel as if this person (or perhaps you, feel free to switch energies) just looks at you in awe and can't keep their eyes off you.

Now that we have info for JR, Let's move to MV.

🌕🌊🐸🎇💙

While JR may lift you up, I feel MV may calm you down. With this moon behind the fairy here they may feel like they know you very well intuitively, or that you have a more spiritual connection. I'm feeling he's a good listener and will calm you down when you're overthinking or confused or even just need someone to vent or chat with. With this Flourish card he likely just wants to see you grow and learn and be there for you through rough times (we have the lotus flower here, which are known for growing even in muddy or harsh conditions).

With this Frog Spirit: clear out the clutter and Water Flight: Heaviness lifts, burdens are cast away, weightlessness , I'm really feeling MV helps lift your burdens and clears out the "clutter" in your life.

Does this person make life feel simple and content, or are you finding it messy and complicated? "Frog Spirit appears to tell you to clean house-- prioritize what you need and get rid of or give away the rest so you can have some space in your day and in your head." Perhaps you are holding onto baggage or things that aren't serving you during this time. You'll intuitively know if that's the case. This could also be a message to take a leap of faith!

I'm seeing so much water, so emotions are high here whether consciously or unconsciously. Even this frog here has a little dew drop in his hand! Some emotions may need deeper inspection here or it could be a call to go with the flow.

Now it seems like we are at a bit of a tie here, so while I can't tell you which relationship to choose, I can give you general advice!

I used my Legendary Ladies deck here for the energy you should embody (Amaterasu: inner beauty) and general advice (Arianrhod: fertility)

We'll start with Amaterasu. Drawing this card means finding your own inner beauty and shining it on to the world. if you've been disappointed or discouraged, look within yourself for the light you need to go forward. I'm feeling you have all the love and light you need to answer this! Embody your own inner beauty and what makes you feel happy and special. Everyone has their own unique personality and talents and I feel you'll know which love interest will work best with you.

Last but not least, we have Arianrhod. The time is right for you to bring forth something new, whether it is into the physical, spiritual, or subconscious world. Goddess of fertility & Fate Aryanrod is urging you on. And look at all this green and growth! Whatever love interest nourishes you best you should go for. I'm feeling you will be bringing a new energy into your life, whether it is a change of belief or point of view or the love interest themself that will help you reach a point of growth and good opportunities.

If you'd like to send a tip it can be done through Venmo, PayPal, CashApp or Ko-fi. I appreciate even a dollar, as they help me keep my readings interesting and detailed for all my wonderful clients. All of my tips go to new decks or charms. You can also take a look at what I offer for paid readings: here.

My apologies for this being so long! Usually I don't do this much for my free readings but I felt really drawn to. Let me know what resonated for you! I absolutely love hearing from you guys.

Sending lots of love and light your way! 🧚‍♀️💖

~the-faeryqueen

#my readings #free divination readings #opiaivo #romance reading #love triangle #ashes of love #my asks #oracle readings #free oracle readings #oracle of the fairies #legendary ladies goddess deck #Spirit animal oracle #Oracle of the Mermaids #free readings

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mendesbadrepuation · 5 years

Text

More Than A Game // Shawn Mendes *Assistant Series* Part 3

Part 1 Part 2

Warning this part actually kinda sucks and maybe terrible? yeah um I am sorry for this shitty writing lol. Next few parts get a little better. I hope so lol.

〰️〰️〰️〰️

Shawn was expected to appear at the after party once his performance was over. He’d do a quick change and head over to the private party. I was never one to go to those parties so I sure didn’t plan on it now.

What does he mean. This isn’t over?

If there is more to that kiss then I know that I won’t be able to stop myself or him. I couldn’t think straight after that kiss. It’s been 10 minutes and I’m still scrambling around trying to gather myself. Shawn was finishing up his performance and I could feel my heartbeat picking up. I managed to get all of mine and Shawn’s things together even with a fuzzy head.

“Shawn great as always.” I hear people around us greeting him as they usually do after his shows. I kept my back turned to him so I could keep my focus in check.

“Thank you.” He mumbles quickly and I could feel his eyes staring at me from behind. Remain calm you freakin assistant!

I felt his large hand go to my waist and he had his lips close to my head. “Can I skip that after party?” Shawn asks and his voice was so dark.

“You and I both know that you can’t. Just go for an hour and you can join the rest of us on the plane. You know the drill.” I tell him like I’m the boss of him. Sometimes I pretty much am.

“Just so you know. It’s only you and me on that plane. Andrew has to fly in later.” Shawn squeezes my waist and walks back into his dressing room. I let out a deep breath I didn’t know I was holding in.

~~~

My heels clicked against the pavement of the blacktop as I carried my things over to the plane. I was alone and I’ll be honest I was starting to get really cold.

“Miss. Your things are on the plane and you have privacy to change. Shawn will be arriving soon.” The nice man in a black tux tells me before I walk up the steps into the private jet. I thank him and make my way on.

In my bag I had a outfit picked out for tonight. A pair of shorts, a simple t shirt, and a light hoodie. I step out of my dress and put my shorts on. I was facing away from the doors when I heard footsteps. I quickly put my t shirt on and turn around.

Shawn was standing next to the door. I suddenly heard the jets starting to fire and I knew we were about to take off. I notice that the buttons on his shirt are open and it was also untucked. His hair was falling from his gel he put in earlier but it made his curls just even more beautiful.

“We need to talk about some things.” Shawn says as he stares at me.

“I’m listening.” I take a seat and pull my legs up criss cross. Shawn takes a seat in front of me and puts his elbows on his knees so he was leaning closer to me.

“Y/n. I’ve known you for 4 months now. In that time you have become so many things to me. I don’t know how you do it or what you have done to me but I can’t stop thinking about you.” He confesses right in front of me. “It’s moments like we have right now that make me feel grounded. Yes I’m on a private jet. But looking at you in your shorts and an old t shirt just makes my heart pound. You’re so beautiful in anything. I’m sure even more beautiful with nothing.” Shawn winks at me smoothly and I felt a blush creep on my face.

“But Shawn. Let’s be real here for a moment. I’m your assistant. I don’t think it’s very professional for us to be involved in a different way.” I say truthfully. I was worried about my job and my reputation.

“Y/n I don’t care what they say. You are obviously more than an assistant to me. It’s been 4 months and I’ve well-well- I’ve fallen hard for you. I know that’s like crazy for even me to say but I can’t deny the way I feel about you. I just can’t.” He reaches over and takes my hands from my lap.

“Shawn I can’t deny they way you make me feel. You give me butterflies just by looking at me with those puppy brown eyes. You’re the only one who takes notice on my daily appearance. And honestly you’re the first guy in my life to ever jump the gun on admitting how they feel.” I intertwine our fingers and look deep into Shawn’s eyes. “Are you sure you’re not jumping into this too quick? I am just your lousy assistant Shawn. And quite frankly I really like my job.”

“Will you just let it play out for now? At least give me a try. I’ll prove it to you that this isn’t just some fling for me. If something happens and it goes completely wrong I’ll make sure you keep your job and everything will remain the same. I swear to you. But please. Give me a chance?” Shawn was almost on his knees begging for me. I was in shock from all of his words. How could he have fallen for me like that? I mean seriously me??

Watching him beg like that took a toll on my heart. It opened up this gate that I was very cautious about keeping closed. Some how he found the key and just walked on through.

“I’m willing to try it.” I smile and Shawn jumps from his seat. In a split second he cups my face and places his lips onto mine in a very passionate kiss. I wrap my arms around his neck and he pulls me up from my waist. He takes my legs and wraps them around his waist all while we managed to keep the kissing going. (This is practically impossible but with Shawn Mendes I think he could do it easily. I’m js)

Our bodies, our minds, and ourselves wanted each other like no other. That’s where the passion came from. Because we both needed this in our lives. We’ve had tension between us for so long and now it’s here.

Shawn falls back into the two seats and I situated myself on his lap. His hands roamed everywhere around my body. He was careful on his placements because he knew he didn’t want to push any limits. We just wanted our lips on each other’s in this moment. We wanted to know that feeling and never wanted that tingling to go away.

“Shawn” I take a deep breath and lean my forehead against his. I watch his chest rise and fall as I focused to catch my breath. I put my hand on his bare chest and could feel his fast beating heart.

“I’m crazy about you.” He whispers and I notice his swollen lips from so much contact. I could see the warm pink tint on his cheeks that I found so beautiful on him.

“Don’t forget. I am just your assistant.” I joke to him and he cracks a smile. He leans up and places a soft kiss on my forehead.

For a while I sat in his lap and just talked to him. We’ve picked up on things about each other so now it was just to fill in those gaps. There was so many stories that I shared and he shared. Eventually I got up so he could change out of his nicer clothes. He came back in with his sweats and a plain t shirt. The shirt was black so he looked slimmer but it also hugged his muscles perfectly.

“We should get some sleep before we land. You’ve got a long day ahead of you.” I point out and Shawn starts to curl up in the seat next to me. His head leaned against my thigh and he turned his music on to relax. Once it gets quiet enough and I know he’s drifted off to sleep I start to relax myself. I had work to catch up on and to finalize things for this festival he was performing at tomorrow night.

I pull out my MacBook and begin to type softly so I’m careful not to wake him. At one point he shifts in his sleep and puts his head up higher on my thigh. I feel my heart ache at how amazing he looked just sleeping. This wasn’t the first time he’s done this. He would always fall asleep near me and I sure didn’t mind. His warmth was very comforting.

My fingers brush through his hair softly and before I knew it he had soft snores coming from him. I finish up the last thing and shut down my laptop. The jet was quiet and dark. I take some blankets out and lay one over Shawn, then myself. I curl up in the seat the best way I can. I always made Shawn get the longer seat so he can stretch out and get plenty of rest. I was smaller so I could curl up if I needed to. His health was way more important anyways.

I felt Shawn cuddle up under the blanket and he moves his hand. It roams around until it lands on my leg. His hand took up the length of my leg and he wraps it around and snuggles into my side. I drift off to sleep faintly hearing John Mayer playing from Shawn’s headphones.

~~~~~~~

My body bolts awake when the jet hits some turbulence. I hated sleeping on these things and I never got enough sleep. Shawn still was snuggled close to me and I’m surprised I didn’t even disturb him.

I look up and see the co captain walking towards us. “We are landing in about 20 minutes Ms.” I thank him and he returns back into his area. I get up gently, careful not to disturb Shawn, so he could get as much sleep as possible. I gather everything up and put my stuff and some of Shawn’s things in my back pack. Shawn had all his stuff already gathered so I find my seat next to him again.

“Shawn.” I whisper softly as I lift one of his headphones out. He stirs around and I watch him inhale deeply. I rub his chest softly to just slowly wake him up. It’s something that I learned with him so he would be less grouchy about waking up. He was a bear one time for the whole day from the way I woke up him. It was very bad and I told myself to never let that happen again.

“We’re about to land.” I say a little louder so he knows he needs to seriously be getting up. This is the time where me and him will do our morning things and spend a bit with ourselves. He gets a chance to connect with his fans through some social media and I generally check up on things. It was a weird thing but both of us enjoyed it.

I place my earphones in and shuffle one of my favorite morning playlists. We had a busy day ahead of us between interviews and performances it would get so hectic so fast. I was tired from not getting very much sleep but I pushed through it.

When the plane lands we make our way through the airport. I kept my eyes focused on my phone as Shawn stopped here and there to greet his fans.

I had on a pair of black leggings with a short white vans shirt. My black ray ban sunglasses were on to cover up the bags under my eyes. My hair was still lightly curled from the night before. After putting myself out for the public I have to keep myself presentable most of the time. The sunglasses we’re just extra precaution so I showed no weakness.

“Y/N!” A group of people shout my name and I glance up from my phone. There was a herd of people running towards me and they had their hands flailing around everywhere. My heart beat quickens as I stare at them in shock. What the hell do I do? Run?

Before I have time to react they already swarmed around me. I suck in a deep breath and remember everything Shawn told me to do. Simply smile and say hi with the sweetest voice ever. But he said it was easy for me because my smile is always beautiful and my voice sounds like an angel.

I take pictures with a bunch of people and greet them. All of them said very nice things to me and some secretly whispered “I ship you and Shawn together.” Oh if they only knew.

“Alright everyone needs to back up.” One of our security guys break between the group of people to get to me. I felt Shawn’s hand land on my back so he can almost guard me. My breathing picks up from so much going on in one moment. People were pushing and shoving trying to get between Shawn and I. The security guard pushes us to break out of the crowd. We begin walking fast through the crowds to get away and for safety precautions.

We make our way through the airport quickly and Shawn’s hand never left my back. If it wasn’t on my back then it was around my waist. It was sweet that he was so protective, but I knew how to be around these crowds. I’ve been doing it for 4 months now. Then it hit me how he has always been this way. Every time we’re around these crowds he has been by my side guarding me from any danger.

There it was. The butterflies and the heart flutters. A smile creeps up on my face as we got into our car that was taking us to Shawn’s first interview of the day.

“What are you smiling about over there?” Shawn says as he notices me being all giddy.

“Just thinking about how amazing you are.” Shawn’s cheek turn a bright shade of pink and he reaches over grabbing my hand. He brings my hand up to his lips and gently kisses the top of it.

“You’re more amazing.” I watch Shawn pull out of his phone. He had a picture of me and him as his lock screen. It was one from last night that the media had captured. It was the time he spun me around and made me laugh. His smile was so full and you could see the sparkle in his eyes as he looked at me.

Why did everything feel so right with him?

#Shawn #Shawn mendes #mendes #shawn peter raul mendes #shawnblr #imagines #assistant #blurbs #fluff

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unfortunate-stranger-losers · 5 years

Photo

Six Baudelaires AU, Part Three {AO3} {Masterlist} {Part One} {Part Two}

Chapter Eight → in which the Baudelaires raid the fridge

IMPORTANT NOTICE FOR TODAY'S CHAPTER

TRIGGER WARNING - In the final section of this chapter, self-harm via scratching, brought on by a panic attack, is described. It does not go past scratching, and skin is not broken, but if that is triggering for you, please be cautioned or skip the final segment. Thank you, and stay safe!

“Are you ready?” Violet said, standing under the waterfall.

“If we wait until we’re ready…” Quigley began, staring up at the slope.

“We’ll be waiting for the rest of our lives.” Violet finished. They shared a significant glance, and then she said, “Let’s go.”

They moved forwards, and it took a few moments for them to get their forks into the ice far enough to hold. Then Violet reached up and tapped the ice to find a solid spot. For the first few steps, the two children feared that they might never reach the top of the waterfall at the rate they were going, but as time passed, climbing got a bit easier. They couldn’t find the strength or time to stop and talk, but they both sent each other encouraging smiles as they kept on.

“They’re taking too long.” Lilac said. “I can invent some shoes and go after them.”

“Lilac, chill. They’re climbing up a giant-ass waterfall.” Nick said. “Help us with the books.”

Solitude was scouring the bottom shelves, climbing through and looking for some books or pages that may be intact. Klaus and Nick were climbing ladders, while Lilac glanced up and down the middle shelves and sulked.

“Yeah, Li, let them have their date.” Klaus said.

“It’s not a date!” Lilac said.

Solitude looked up. “Sure, hon.”

“They’re rescuing Sunny. That’s all they’re doing.” Lilac said sharply. “And if you all don’t shut up, you’re grounded.”

“Ground us from what?” Nick asked, grabbing a book. “We haven’t got shit.”

“I’ll make a preemptive ground.” Lilac said. “Soon as we have things, you’re grounded from them.”

“You could ground Nick from Soli.” Klaus suggested, giggling. “Only Lilac can hold her for a week.”

“Fuck that.” Nick said.

“Grounded from frogs.” Solitude suggested.

“Yeah, your frog’s already frozen over,” Klaus said, “So we can’t ground you from them for a while.”

“I could push you into the empty swimming pool a few rooms over.” Lilac said, gesturing, “And leave you there until we get everyone back. No rescue missions for you.”

“You’re the worst.” Klaus said, smiling slightly.

Nick pulled a book from the shelf, and then he said, “Hey, guys? This one’s intact.”

“Oh, hell yeah!” Solitude cheered, rolling out from under a shelf and running towards him.

“Hmm, still not sure I like Solitude swearing.” Lilac said, walking over with Klaus.

“You don’t get a say in it.” Nick said. “Thank fuck, this looks like a codebook- unless the ‘Codes’ on the front somehow means something else.”

“Better than the cookbook we found last.” Klaus said, picking up Solitude so she could see.

“Look for Verbal Fridge Dialogue.” Lilac said.

“Yeah, no shit, Li.” Nick said, flipping through pages. “Looks like the index got burned out, but I can skim. Let’s see… shit, there’s a lot of codes here.”

“Might be an interesting read when we’re not pressed for time.” Klaus said.

“Okay, dingus,” Nick said, “Now shut up- here! I found it! I found it!”

He looked ecstatic, his face lighting up as he looked down at the large title font that read Verbal Fridge Dialogue. He immediately spun on his heel and ran back to the fridge before his siblings could even move.

“Hey! Wait up!” Lilac called as she and Klaus took off after him.

Nick threw open the fridge door, holding the book in one hand and digging through with the other. “Okay, so, this book seems super fragile, so, Klaus, after this, we’re gonna have to copy it real quick.”

“Okay, dude, what does it say?” Klaus asked.

“Read it!” Solitude cheered.

“The code is started with Very Fresh Dill; Quigley’s right. It then says, ‘The receiver of the message should find their own initials, as noted by one of our poet volunteers-”

He tossed the book to Lilac, who jumped back in shock, only barely managing to catch it. She glanced down, and then read, “The darkest of the jams of three / Contain within the addressee. That’s a couplet, like Isadora writes.”

“Are couplets a code?” Klaus asked. “Was Isadora a Volunteer?”

Nick shot his head around, giving Klaus a glare that sent him stumbling backwards. “No!” he shouted, suddenly very angry, and Solitude let out a yelp. “Isadora is not one of them and she never will be!”

Klaus gasped. “Nick! What the fuck?”

Nick shut his eyes tight, taking a deep breath, and then he said, “Nevermind. We have to find the code, we’ll talk later.” he turned back to the fridge, and before anyone could say anything else, he said, “Boysenberry jam’s the darkest.”

He handed the jar to Solitude, who quickly bit open the lid and looked inside. “JS.” she read. “Jacques Snicket?”

“Jacques Snicket is dead, the message can’t have been for him.” Lilac said.

“Maybe the sender didn’t know that.” Klaus said.

“It doesn’t matter who was supposed to get the message.” Nick snapped. “It then said in the book that if necessary, the dialogue uses a fruit-based calendar for days of the week in order to announce a gathering. Sunday is represented by a lone olive, Monday by two, et cetera. Does anyone see the olives?”

“There!” Solitude pointed to the top shelf of the fridge.

Nick reached up and grabbed the olives, and then opened it, saying, “I see five, but we better make sure…”

When the jar opened, the olive stench burst out, and Klaus threw his hand over his mouth, saying, “Crud! I hate that smell.”

“I think it’s fine-” Lilac said.

Nick dropped the jar and stepped back, throwing his hands over his face. The jar shattered onto the ground, five olives spilling onto the dirty floor.

“Nick!” Lilac dropped the book, leapt over the jar and grabbed him by the shoulders, spinning him so he could see her face. “Nick, holy shit, what happened? What was it?”

“I…” Nick shut his eyes. “I’m sorry, I just… I’m sorry.”

“Nick, it’s okay.” Lilac said, reaching up to put a comforting hand on his face, but he flinched back, so she put her hand back on his shoulder. “I’m sorry. What happened?”

“It’s… it’s just, the… the olives.” Nick said. “I forgot… they just remind me of the aqueous martinis, which remind me of- I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Klaus said, also moving forwards; Soli hugged his arm, and Klaus put his other arm around him. “Don’t be sorry. Do you need a second?”

“No, no.” Nick shook his head. “No, I…” he leaned his head onto Lilac’s shoulder, and then said, “There’s five. Five olives. That’s… Thursday. There’s a meeting on Thursday.”

“How… how do we know where this meeting is?” Lilac asked.

Nick shut his eyes, and started to recite; he found that recounting things he read sometimes helped calm him. “Any spice-based condiment should have a coded label referring volunteers to encoded poems.”

Klaus handed Solitude over to Nick, watching as she gave him a quick hug, and then he and Lilac moved to the fridge. “Um, Mustard is a spice-based condiment.”

Lilac took the jar of mustard. “Maybe there’s something on the wrapping?”

“There’s nothing but the label and list of ingredients.” Klaus said.

“Maybe it’s in the ingredients.” Lilac said. She gave a glance from Nick to the shattered puddle beneath them, and then she said, “Let’s go to the table.”

Violet let out a gasp as her fork almost fell from the ice; it wobbled a little, and she lost her grip, holding on with one hand. Quigley looked over at her, terrified. They were so high up, halfway up the waterfall, and if she fell…

“I can… I’ll-” Quigley began.

Violet let out a groan and a cry as she managed to hoist herself back up, grabbing back onto her fork. She shut her eyes, breathing a second, trying to calm herself down. Quigley glanced down at her to make sure she had a good enough grip, and then he looked up.

“Violet!” he called. “There’s a ledge a few feet up! We can rest there, can you make it?”

“Definitely!” cried Violet. “Can you?”

He nodded, and they stumbled up.

After a few minutes, Quigley made it to the ledge, and shoved his forks into his pocket, reaching out a hand for Violet. She gave him a smile as she tossed her fork to the ledge and took his palm, letting him help her up.

“Thank you.” she said.

“It’s not a problem.” Quigley said, watching her stuff her forks into her pockets. “We’ve got a long way to go, and we don’t want to tire ourselves out. Oh, uh, I have some carrot bags. I packed snacks for the trip before I left with the Snow Scouts, they should still be good.”

“Thank you again.” Violet said. “You didn’t have to do that, and you didn’t have to offer to share.”

“What? Am I just gonna eat carrots by myself halfway up a frozen waterfall?” Quigley smirked, passing her a small bag.

“We’ve still got a long way to go.” Violet said, glancing up as she struggled to open the bag, eventually taking her gloves off to make it easier. “Hopefully there won’t be an ambush up there.”

“What’ll we do if there is one?”

“I stole this from the caravan before it fell.” Violet said, showing off her knife. “I can stab someone.”

“Good plan.” Quigley said. “I think I actually have a pocketknife somewhere, but it’ll take a while to find.”

“Don’t worry, then. I’ll cover you til you find it.” Violet giggled.

They laughed a second, and then Quigley said, “Do you really think we can make it up there?”

“We made it this far.” Violet said.

“Celebrate when you’re half done / And the finish won’t be half as fun.” Quigley said, his smile fading. “My sister wrote that.”

“We’ll find her, and Duncan.” Violet promised. “And then we’ll all be together. We’ll solve all our mysteries, and find someplace to stay.” she smiled. “Duncan and I were talking about making a printing press and starting a newspaper.”

“Of course you did.” Quigley grinned. “He’s wanted to be a journalist since our father decided it’d be funny to use the newspaper to help teach him to read. And Isadora’s wanted to be a poet since…” he trailed off.

“What?”

“Since our parents gave her a poetry instructor.” Quigley said. “They taught her all kinds of poems, and… and I had a cartography instructor, who came to our house and showed me how to make maps and… and hide things in them.” He turned to Violet, eyes wide. “It’s almost like they… they were training us. For this. For codes and secrets and… and VFD.”

Violet thought hard. Had she ever had an engineering instructor? No, her parents had shown her and Lilac all they knew, and then helped them find books to learn more. In fact, with the exception of Prufrock Prep, she didn’t think she’d ever had a teacher past Kindergarten, where her and Lilac had gotten kicked out for taking apart the speaker system. But… Anna Karenina. How many books had they been given that were secret codes? Maybe there was a code she had been taught that she didn’t yet realize.

“That’s a strange thought.” she finally said. “A bit worrying.”

Quigley curled up, staring down at his snackbag. “There’s so much we didn’t learn about them. And so much they didn’t learn about us… I never told them a lot of things that I wanted to.”

“I know the feeling.” Violet sighed. “I was learning how to make cake for Mother’s birthday, and I never got to try and bake it.”

“I was making them an anniversary present- a map of all the places they’d traveled.” Quigley sighed. “And I never got to tell them that I don’t…” he hesitated, and then said, “I mean, Duncan and Isadora came out to them, but I never told them that whenever I was doing astronomy class and called myself a space ace…”

Violet laughed, and Quigley flinched. “No, no, I’m not making fun of you, it’s a good pun, I’ll have to make sure Nick knows it.”

Quigley’s face it up. “Really?” He paused, and then said, “I think they knew I… I’ve had crushes on more than one gender, but I don’t…”

“I think my parents found out when I told them I wanted to marry both Elizabeth and Darcy.” Violet smiled. “Lilac and Nick teased me about that for years. I don’t even know if they remember now.”

Quigley stared at her. “Holy shit. Vi… I said the same thing.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Oh my God.”

“Nice to know we read the same books.” Violet said.

They laughed, but as Violet moved back, one of her gloves fell from the ledge, falling down the waterfall.

“Oh! Your glove!” Quigley said.

Violet leaned over, looking down, and she said, “We’ll get it when we go back.”

“Your hand will be cold.”

“I’ll manage.” Violet pulled her other glove back on, so she wouldn’t lose that, too. “Worst case scenario, I’ll rip my jacket and wrap it around.”

“Still…” hesitantly, Quigley reached out and took her ungloved hand, holding it between his gloved ones. “Maybe we can… keep it warm a bit longer.”

Violet glanced down to hide the fact that her face had gone a bit red. “Um, yes.” She sighed. “You know, it was… very impressive that you got this way all on your own.”

“Your inventions are more impressive.”

“Just as impressive.”

“Alright, we’ll settle for that.”

They laughed again, and Violet turned her head to look across from the waterfall, out onto the mountains across from them.

“You know,” she said, “If you have to build a secret headquarters, this is a good place to do it. It’s a very lovely view.”

Quigley followed her gaze, and then turned to stare at Violet instead. “Very lovely indeed.” he said.

She turned over to him, realizing where he was looking, and she smiled more brightly than she had in a while.

Klaus sat on the edge of the table, flipping over the mustard bottle. “Okay,” he said, as Nick sat across from him, placing Solitude on his lap, and Lilac perched herself on the edge of the table, “So this should refer us to a poem?”

“What does it say, first of all?” Lilac asked.

Klaus read aloud. “Vinegar, mustard seed, salt, tumeric, the final quatrain of the eleventh stanza of ‘The Garden of Proserpine’ by Algernon Charles Swinburne, and calcium disodium- an allegedly natural preservative.”

“Screw the natural preservative,” Lilac said, “Nick, Klaus, have you read The Garden of Proserpine?”

Klaus shook his head, and then Nick quietly said, “I did.” he was staring very hard at the table. “Mom gave it to me. A collection of poems for our eighth birthday.” Soli put her small hand over his, and then he said, “I… I hate-” he cut himself off, and then said. “But I remember the poem. It’s very long.”

“Skip to the eleventh stanza.” Lilac said.

Nick shut his eyes. “Let’s see… Here, where the world is quiet…”

“What?”

“I am tired of tears and laughter…” he counted on his fingers, the first line of each stanza. “Here life has death for neighbor… No growth of moor or coppice… Pale, without name or number… Though one were strong as seven… Pale, beyond porch and portal… She waits for each and other… There go the loves that wither… We are not sure of sorrow…”

“Cheery.” Solitude commented.

“Yep.” Nick nodded. “Okay, eleventh stanza…”

From too much love of living, From hope and fear set free, We thank with brief thanksgiving Whatever gods may be That no life lives for ever; That dead men rise up never; That even the weariest river Winds somewhere safe to sea.

“The last quatrain is the last four lines.” Klaus said. “Maybe the clue is ‘even the weariest river winds somewhere safe to sea.’ Maybe the place we’re supposed to meet is at the end of the river.”

“Or the end of the sea.” Lilac said.

Solitude crawled off of Nick’s lap, wandering back over to the fridge. Nick watched her go, and then said, “The poem’s not a happy one at all, you know. You know Proserpine is-”

“The Roman form of Persephone.” Lilac nodded. “I had a Greek Myth phase too, Nick, we all did.”

“Well, then you’ll remember she was the Queen of the Underworld.” Nick said.

“She didn’t really want to be.” Klaus said.

“Nah, I think she was into it.” Lilac said.

“Don’t project onto a greek goddess, Li.”

“If you’re quite done,” Nick interrupted, “The poem’s all about a garden that traps you, ensnares you, and leaves you for dead.” He let out a cynical laugh. “You know, in a way, it’s sort of like-”

“Found something!” Solitude called, running back over.

They looked over, to see her waving the codebook over her head. She climbed back onto Nick’s lap, tossed the book on the table, and then hoisted herself up after it. She flipped back to the page on Verbal Fridge Dialogue, and after making sure her siblings were looking, she flipped the page.

On the back, above some other code instructions, was a word, very lightly penciled in.

Sugar Bowl.

Nick glared at the page as if he intended to set it on fire with his mind.

“Sugar Bowl.” Lilac said. “Esme said something about finding that, she-”

“Mom stole it from her.” Nick said.

Lilac jumped. “What?”

Nick got to his feet, not meeting their eyes. “Mom stole her fucking sugar bowl.” he said. “Because it’s important and she didn’t want her to have it. I don’t know much else, but…” he inhaled sharply, reaching to scratch his arm, and then he said, “I’m sorry. I need to be alone for a moment.”

He ran off, and his siblings sadly watched him go.

“Just give him a minute.” Lilac said quietly. “We don’t want to crowd him.”

“But…” Solitude began.

“He’ll be fine.” Lilac said. “I promise.”

Nick slid against a half-collapsed wall, screaming into his lap, hot tears springing to the edge of his eyes and streaming down his face.

Stop it! Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it, stop…

He had to tell them. He had to tell Lilac. He had to tell them everything, they were getting closer to them, to VFD, they had to know, they had…

He kept scratching his arm, kept screaming into his clothes so that his siblings wouldn’t have to hear. His arm was getting red, but he didn’t care. He had to stay alert. If he thought about how it felt, how his arm felt, how his nails were digging into his skin, he would at least know where he was, what he was feeling now. His mind wouldn’t drift to what he’d felt then. What he’d heard, what he’d seen, what had happened to him.

Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop…

Why wouldn’t he just stop crying? His siblings needed him! He needed to tell them, but every time he tried, he just remembered the pain that came with the information, as if it was happening again. The grips on his arm as he heard secrets screamed at him, the kicks and punches and…

STOP IT!

Nick turned around, shoving his face into the wall, and screaming into that.

He suspected, deep down, that he wouldn’t ever be okay again, that something had happened to him that had changed him completely.

But that didn’t make accepting that fact any easier.

#asoue #asoue netflix #ASOUE movie #a series of unfortunate events #six baudelaires au #the slippery slope #mine #my fanfic #six baudelaires official fic

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beingallelite · 5 years

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Independent wrestling's ultimate bad boy Joey Janela didn't close the show at All Elite Wrestling's inaugural pay-per-view, Double or Nothing, this May. He's hoping that will come in time. But he definitely left a heck of an impression in the new promotion's opening match, the Casino Battle Royale.

Not only did he take the craziest fall of the entire night, a reckless crash through a table courtesy of a Luchasaurus chokeslam, but he also had a lit cigarette stapled to his forehead by the dastardly Jimmy Havoc.

You did not read that wrong.

I'll repeat it for emphasis—he had a lit cigarette stapled to his forehead.

Such hijinks are typical of the world that spawned him, the gritty "garbage" matches that often include much wilder stunts and decisions somehow even more questionable. But it was something new for mainstream wrestling, a level of violence not seen since the last time wrestling had a good old-fashioned war: the famed Attitude Era of the late 1990s.

The 30-year-old Janela, it turns out, isn't looking to usher in a new era of ultra-violence, instead preferring to adjust what he does for a wider audience.

Bleacher Report had a chance to sit down with him last week for a wide-ranging discussion, covering everything from his influences to the fact that he still lives at home with his mom.

Jonathan Snowden: How does it feel to be one of those overnight successes who were 10 years in the making? Did you ever think about just walking away from this life and getting a regular job? At some point, it must have been kind of disheartening.

Joey Janela: It's definitely humbled me a bit. The few times I felt like quitting when I was younger. Wrestling really wasn't going anywhere, and I was taking off work and stuff on the weekend to make $25 and putting it all toward gas. It really isn't ideal, but I stuck with it, and sure enough, I've found myself in a position where I can make a living wrestling and make it to the mainstream.

JS: What are some of the ways you used to pay the bills while trying to get to the position every independent wrestler craves: earning your living from wrestling alone? Someone told me you used to deliver pizzas a couple of years ago?

Janela: I don't know when was the last time [I delivered pizzas]. Maybe three years ago? I tried to get a job at a factory. It was going to be a job making those gold credit cards, like Visas. That didn't work out and that wasn't ideal for me. I tried Uber and delivering pizza. I had pretty much done it all or tried to. Most of the time I found myself getting fired. That was basically my run in real-life work.

JS: This must be a pretty nice change. Has your life changed a lot since signing with AEW?

Janela: For sure. There's a lot less to worry about now. I used to throw all my money to wrestling. Now I'm living comfortably. I'm still living at home, but I'm usually not home at all. Usually I'm here like once a week, so it's not a bad deal.

JS: Home, like with your parents?

Janela: I still live with my mom, but I'm never home, really. When TV starts, I'm gonna get my own place and stuff, but right now my mom, she doesn't mind, and I don't mind, either.

JS: You are so closely identified with the indy scene that I wasn't sure I'd ever see you in a mainstream promotion on a channel like TNT. Did you imagine yourself reigning as the king of the underground shows forever? Or was this always your goal, wrestling on a national stage like this?

Janela: Absolutely. If you're not in the business to make a living and get to that point, I don't know what you're doing it for. Some people say they do it for the love, but there's got to be an endgame when you're killing yourself week in and week out.

My body right now is not as bad as you think it would be, but I've been doing this for half my life now—15 years. I feel it. I have to get adjusted, get massages and all that stuff to make sure I'm good to go every week for TV and for the future.

You need to make money and you need to have an endgame to make it to a mainstream, national wrestling company. It's never been closer for a lot of these new people getting into the business.

I remember when I first started it was almost unattainable to get to that point, to get to WWE. Yeah, TNA was still in town but to get to WWE was so hard. Really just the cream-of-the-crop guys made it in: the CM Punks and Bryan Danielsons. It was almost unattainable back then.

Now there's a light at the end of the tunnel, and if you work hard enough and bust your ass, you can not only get to a national wrestling company, now you have your choice of them.

JS: I know you're used to having a lot of creative freedom on the independent scene, especially in the shows for Game Changer Wrestling that you helped create and run. How has your experience in AEW been so far?

Janela: So far, they've given me a lot of creative freedom. The agents, like Jerry Lynn, have been great. At All Out, we had Tommy Dreamer. He just wanted to know where we were going with stuff and that was it. It was no different from calling a match at any company. We really haven't crossed the line yet. And we won't, especially with TV coming.

JS: I wonder where that line is? At Double or Nothing, you had the famous spot where a cigarette was stapled to your head. The match with Jon Moxley was brutal. And the three-way match (against Jimmy Havoc and Darby Allin) at All Out was beyond bonkers. Have they given you any idea yet where the left and right limits are?

Janela: The three way, I think it was good, harmless fun with some craziness in there. We were within the boundaries of a PG-14 environment. And, if we had done it without the staple gun, I think the match could work in a PG environment. For the most part, the craziness was contained.

I'm not really big on people taking chairs to the head. I know how bad concussions can be. When I was younger, I did take chair shots to the head. That's a no-no for me now.

JS: It's been funny for me to watch your ongoing feud with former wrestling manager Jim Cornette on social media. While he's been insulting you as a "mud show" wrestler, I actually think you've had one of the best years of anyone in the sport. What do you make of it all?

Janela: With my knee injury, you have to realize, I haven't even had the full year to work. So, I'm really happy with what I've done. I had two good matches at Joey Janela's Spring Break, with Marko Stunt and Jungle Boy, when I wasn't 100 percent ready to be in the ring again. But I had to get in there and do what I had to do.

For a month or so after that, I was hurting. I did a show in Alaska two weeks later and I could barely walk because of the cold and the way my knee was doing.

It lit a fire under me, and now I'm better than ever in the ring. I think I'm having a great year. Guys like Jim Cornette, of course they're not going to watch the matches that people say are great matches. They're going to watch the matches where the craziness happens and try to pull out things to engage his followers. It is what it is.

I think me and Cornette, we rub each other's back when it comes to getting each other publicity. So I have no problem with it.

JS: Every time he posts something about your belly or wrestling skill, a small army of people follow behind in the mentions. It's almost scary.

Janela: I'd rather deal with Jim Cornette than his followers, that's for sure. It's fine. I don't care if people want to s--t on my physique. I've gotten in better shape in the last year and I am looking to get into even better shape for TV. I'm starting to diet now. But, when you talk about my wrestling, that's where I draw the line. Other than that, have fun.

JS: I've been most impressed with you in the kind of old-school match that you'd think most of your critics would love. You and David Starr went an hour at Beyond Wrestling's Americanrana 19 in July, and it was one of the most incredible bouts of the entire year.

You spent almost the entirety of the first 10 minutes doing really old-school Ole Anderson-style armbars and matwork—and it was amazing. Then it became one of the best hardcore matches of the year. That's what I love about you. You never know what to expect. Are you trying hard not to have a template you follow in every match?

Janela: I don't have a set move set or a formula. A lot of these guys, they get lazy. They develop a formula which they use every match. And it makes their matches lack excitement.

I've always been a good technical wrestler. I'm pretty good at adapting to my opponent. I wrestled a match with Zach Sabre Jr. a couple years ago where we went to a 30-minute time limit draw. Thirty minutes of technical wrestling. That's the kind of match my critics are never going to watch, because they don't want to admit I have that aspect.

Starr is one of the best wrestlers in the world and easy to wrestle. And that's what happens. The crowd was very involved from the beginning of that match, because we'd built a storyline over three years. They showed us the proper respect and were into the story we were telling.

The match was organic. We didn't call it in the back. We just went out there and did it. We talked about the high points, what we were going to hit and the rest was done in the ring organically in the ring. It was one of the finest performances of my wrestling career. Fans were telling me the hour flew by, which is something that's hard to do in a one-hour match. I'm happy with it.

JS: October is coming up fast, and that means TNT and television. That's something, a production on this level at least, you've never really done. Is it daunting to try something new like this?

Janela: It's taken me 15 years to get to this point, and I'm ready to learn other phases of the business. I'm not too nervous about it. Every time I've gone out for a pay-per-view for AEW, I've smoked it. I don't think it will be any different on TV. I think I'm going to excel on TV.

A few years ago, people were doubting my ability, saying I was just a stuntman. I proved a lot of those people wrong, and they became huge fans.

Now I'm dealing with that on a larger, mainstream level. A lot of people who watch the TV show are going to be surprised at how much I grasp every element of professional wrestling. It's going to be fun doing a lot of interviews and stuff I haven't done too much of. And it's also going to be great on my body, giving it a rest and not having a crazy schedule like I've had over the last couple of years.

Outside of TV and outside the ring, I may still have a bit to learn. But, you know, these guys knew what they were getting with me. What you see is what you get. I'm not really a character. Joey Janela is Joey Janela, inside the ring and outside.

You can follow the further exploits of Joey Janela on Twitter and, starting October 2, on AEW television. Tickets are on sale for the promotion's next PPV Full Gear and weekly events across the country.

Hard Times Promo of the Week

Cody Rhodes has become one of wrestling's great heroes, not just because of his excellent body of work inside the wrestling ring, but also because of his galvanizing personality outside it. He's taken us into his life and his battle with the wrestling industry, making that fight our own.

Rhodes feels like a real person. We love his television persona, sure. But it's the real Cody, the one we've grown close to on social media, who truly shines—and that's the Cody Rhodes who was present for a sitdown interview on the latest episode of Road to TNT.

I'm admittedly biased because I saw this filmed in person when I was at Cody's beautiful home in the Atlanta suburbs for a feature profile coming soon to Bleacher Report, but it's typical of what is quickly becoming that series' signature style: just two guys having a conversation about life and sports.

It's as good as wrestling programming gets.

The Illegal Double Team Hot Take

I've seen a lot of criticism online about AEW's decision to book Rhodes into a title match against the promotion's inaugural champion, Chris Jericho, at the next pay-per-view Full Gear.

And, of course, I understand where that criticism is coming from.

Rhodes, along with his running buddies from Being the Elite, have been publicly acknowledged as AEW executive vice presidents. And that's not just in name only. I've seen firsthand just how much responsibility Cody is carrying on his shoulders as they attempt to launch a new brand into a space that has been very unwelcoming in the recent past. In a very real sense, he isn't being chosen to represent AEW at the top of the card—he's chosen himself.

But was there really any other decision to make?

I've been to each of the promotion's first four cards live and, while it's technically true that Rhodes has put himself into the main event, it's also pretty clear he and the rest of the AEW team are just listening to the audience.

He's captured their hearts in a way that doesn't happen every day. To AEW's fans, Cody isn't just another wrestler. He's family.

Rhodes, Kenny Omega and The Young Bucks aren't EVPs who happen to wrestle. They've earned those positions by being some of the top acts in the world. Pretending otherwise, and refusing to promote them as AEW's top stars in the name of fairness, would just be a terrible idea—it would be promotional malpractice.

Jonathan and Kristina Snowden host Illegal Double Team, a weekly podcast about wrestling and life. Available wherever podcasts are found.

#joey ryan #cody rhodes #all elite wrestling #aew #posted on: 9.12.19 #article #bleacher report

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polygamyff · 5 years

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5. Part 4

I find it hilarious how we are in a Starbucks, we kind of first met in a Starbucks. I like the fact we both like the same thing, she loves a Latte and so do I. Robyn legit made an outfit out of my hoodie, she looks so good in everything and I love it. Her beauty is what dreams are made of. What tragedies are written about. What poets spend their lives trying to capture, never to be satisfied in the face of such perfection. Her smile is addictive to watch, the best thing I have done in my own lifetime is make this woman my girlfriend because I will never get tired of watching her. Staring at her long graceful fingers, a new fresh pair of nails, I feel like they was done recently maybe for me but I am impressed. She pinches off another portion of the brownie. Following the piece with my eyes as she brings it towards her mouth while she watches her phone, maybe looking at a text. Head bent slightly forward, her sun-kissed loose curls cascade down at the sides of her shoulders. She is so beautiful and I can't stop the heavy thump of my heartbeat against my chest, the rush of heat to my head, can barely breathe.

Her lips close around the piece of brownie and the fingertips that hold it, my mouth dry as she sucks the remaining traces of chocolate off her fingertips, the glistening flesh curved around the digits. I don’t know why we bother to come out, I want to have sex with her. I gasped before grabbing my Latte, bumping against the handle of the cup near dropping it like an idiot but all was saved, it didn’t fall. Her lashes flutter upwards, her eyes focusing on me, her glistening hazel eyes just staring at me, this is actually making me nervous. She smiles at me, it’s like she knows that I was watching her, knows what she is doing to me. Her tongue peeks out, she curves it over her lower lip, licks away a few brownie crumbs. I shift forward in my seat, my knees bearing against her exposed thigh under the small table. “Good?” I questioned, tilting my head towards the brownie, my eyes never leaving hers. She nods, pinches off another chunk of brownie with her fingers, holds it out to me “you should try it” There's challenge in her voice, we are playing with fire, and we both know it because we are in public.

I gripped her wrist, pull her hand close to my face. Her eyes widen, surprised. Keeping my gaze steadily on her, I wrap my mouth around the brownie, my lips wrap around her fingers. With my tongue I slides the brownie off her fingertips and her eyes flutter, a slight blush to her cheeks. The chocolate is rich and dark, the flavour of her skin sets off sparks. I suck on her fingers, cleaning away the last traces of chocolate, and her chest rises and falls with her rapid breathing, she sways forward a little. When I release her hand and it falls down to the table, her mouth dropped open. She is staring at my lips, and shifts in her seat. I wrap one leg around hers, trapping her to me and she swallows hard visibly, shivers when I trace my hand along her waist until my fingers are dipped into the grooves of her spine. Robyn tilts towards me, pointing at my lips “you've got…” Her voice almost soundless. Eyes hazy, her mouth so close that her warm breath tickles my upper lip “…chocolate” she whispers and then brings her lips to the left corner of my mouth. She slides her tongue along the outline, cleaning away the sweet remains supposedly stuck to my skin. My mind goes blank, my fingers digging into her spine. A gust of breath flutters from her mouth at his touch, hot and moist.

“There…” Sucking the other side of his lip between hers, nipping, her tongue along the flesh. I groan out, I want to grab her, haul her onto my lap but the edge of the table keeps us apart. I rake my other hand through her hair, my palm cradling her head. Keeping her close, tilting her forward. Keeping her. She draws the shape of my mouth with her tongue, travelling along my lips until she is centered with me, exchanging aching breaths through open “and there” She delves into my mouth, her tongue seeking mine in bold strokes, deep and needy and longing and I meet her with the same desperation. She tastes like chocolate and coffee and woman, full-blooded and strong, I aches for her, wants her only more, always more. I suck on her lips, nibbles the skin and she gasps, digs her nails into the skin of my neck. Someone wolf whistled nearby and we jump apart like teenagers being caught making out under the bleachers. Our heads jerk toward the sound. A young group of females and males is sat by their corner booth “oh my god” Robyn said in my ear, placing her face in the crook of my neck, I know she is blushing.

The group jeered at us “better than pornhub” shaking my head smiling, I completely forgot where we was and I knew it was a bad thing “stop it, they cute!!” some female shouted “couple goals though” Robyn moved back from the crook of my neck giggling, she can’t stop laughing “this all your fault, made me forget where I am!” she pushed me lightly away from her “my phone is ringing, thank god” that has never happened to me, that was intense and I am surprised I ain’t got hard, I kept the big boy at bay “why are you even there Leon?” pushing my chair back, who the hell is Leon “well I know that, I am doing a late on Monday. But I don’t think my mom is going to just let you sit there, she lying she don’t see you as her second child” getting up from the chair, grabbing my snapback from the table and placing it on my head. Catching Robyn eye me up with her eyes bulged out “wait a minute” digging into my pocket for my cigarette “what is it?” why is she eye balling me “stand to the side for me” what is even her problem, standing to the side for her “what?” seeing Robyn’ hand reach down touch my bulge, I quickly gripped her hand “hey, don’t” she is really eye balling me “that’s mine, also you can’t walk around like that. Put it down” I chuckled a little “I can’t just put it down, it will soften. Calm your little ass down, just don’t touch it” she is not happy but I am not happy she is speaking to some guy “I don’t want anyone to look” she kissed her teeth, rolling my eyes placing my cigarette between my lips. Turning to face that group people “ayo, where you get your new Js from?” looking down at my sneakers, moving the cigarette from my lips “not released yet, next week you’ll see these come out” the guy looked at me all wide eyed “let’s go then” Robyn came out of nowhere “that’s dope as shit” following behind Robyn “sis, I need to know where you found this man!!” one of the female shouted “I am from Texas ma’am, nice meeting you all” they funny, loud as fuck though because we may have had sex if it wasn’t for them.

Sitting in Robyn’ car, we using her car and she wants to drive and I ain’t about to stop her, she knows where she is going. Closing the car door as I sat in, Robyn instantly placed her bag on my lap, I was about to light my cigarette up “thank you?” I said, is she really mad that I don’t have any control of my dick “are you mad?” I questioned “no, I mean maybe. I don’t know, I wouldn’t say mad but you’re like new around here. Just seems like you’re a very noticeable man, I just see females look at you a lot, this is why I was shocked to know you was single and your age, you don’t look it at all” placing her bag in the back seat “does it matter? I am with you, I don’t notice shit. I just be noticing you, who is Leon?” I need to know this “oh he is my best friend, I am sure I mentioned it to you but yeah he is at my house and I am like I won’t be back, tomorrow I will be and he’s like we can watch a movie and catch up, I was like my parents ain’t about to sit there and hear us speak about dick, so I think I am going to his. But yeah, just making at meet up, he is gay. He loves light skinned tatted up niggas, so he may fancy you. I hope you don’t turn, he ain’t ugly either. He always said we would marry each other If I was forever single” I chuckled shaking my head “mhmmm, I wouldn’t change you for the world. I mean, who starts touching my dick when it’s semi-hard, you was publicly touching me and then getting angry” busting out laughing” I wanted it to behave, shut up!” she hit my arm as I laughed out.

I have so much shit to do when I go to New York have so many meetings in my diary, my assistant is good. She even booked in a slot for Malik, this is how busy I am going to be. I need to go to Texas first and then go New York, I am going to do this all within a day hopefully. Leaning to the side resting my arm on the middle panel, I need to meet my assistant actually. I can meet her at my office, I rather keep busy actually. Saves me from thinking of Robyn and what she is doing, I will miss her a lot “we are here” looking up from my phone “where are we?” I don’t even know where we are “Ocean Avenue, you said take you anywhere because you haven’t been here” she is right “ok, that’s fine. It looks nice” looking back down at my phone, my phone pinged and the notification popped down with the Naomi, quickly flicking it up to get rid of it “who is Naomi?” shifting in the seat, not someone I want to speak about “just a family friend, she erm helps with the real estate. I am just checking my diary, it’s busy” locking my phone, I don’t want to know what she is texting about “I can tell, there is a lot of red on there” nodding my head, that is so awkward and I don’t wan to even hear her name come out of Robyn’ lips.

Fixing my snapback on my head with my free hand “it’s actually nice here ain’t it?” Robyn walked the opposite way towards the water view “it is, I love coming here but I always wanted to come here and walk with my man” it’s a very couple oriented place, walking towards the barrier “look at that” Robyn said pointing, my smile grew seeing the sunset “that is dope” Robyn let my hand go and walked towards the barrier, walking slowly behind her. I have seen many of places but nobody is quite special when you are with the one you love. Placing my hands on either side of Robyn, holding the barrier and pressing myself against Robyn “that is something so beautiful” Robyn is so mesmerised by the sunset but I am mesmerised by her “I think this is one of my goals, to do this with someone I care deeply for and I have” pressing a kiss to Robyn’ cheek “and I am glad that we did this together, you’re such a romantic at heart” Robyn looked at me grinning “it’s you, you put me under some spell. I am happy you came here with me but I am going to miss you” I understand that feeling already, I don’t want to leave.

Getting comfy in Robyn’ car again “I like this car” I really do “shut up, don’t lie to me like that. I seen that car you drive, I seen all those luxury cars, look at my Nissan. Don’t do it” shaking my head laughing “why you being like that? This is a nice car, it drives does it not?” she thinks shit like this is below me “but I know you’re used to that luxury, I mean my dad has an Audi. He has a nice car, he got me this as my first car. I could get another but no, this is my baby” Robyn held onto my hand “you know I appreciate you driving out here for me, I know it’s a long drive for you to do this. You dropping me off at the airport tomorrow though?” Robyn scoffed rolling her eyes at me playfully “playing, I will drop you off but like how will this work now. You’re busy, I am busy. I really didn’t want a man busy as me, then I just feel like we will never see each other and it will make it worse because you know. I love you and I feel like it’s still early times for us and we still need to speak time together” she is so adorable “I will quit it for you, I will travel to you” Robyn cooed out “I want you to be happy, I know your family stress you out and leaving may just trigger things. I don’t want to ruin that, there is something between you and your family and I don’t want to add to your stress, that is not what I want for you. Maurice I care for you, I care for your mentality and also your soul. So we will come to something together, where you are free and also me” I want to cry, honestly because she is so caring towards me “you got me choked up here” clearing my throat.

Intertwining my fingers between Robyn’ “you already know my family wack and you ain’t even met them yet, it ain’t a good thing at all. There is a lot of things money can buy, but it can’t buy you happiness and that’s on everything, it can get rid of your bills, your debt. It can even buy you pussy, drugs, cars, friends but it can’t bring you happiness and anyone with money can tell you that, they ain’t happy. Nobody is, they get sucked into this reality and they don’t know what is real. I am a good guy, I grew up different. I had it there, I have Shawn and he rides for me. He helps me, but that’s it. I don’t have anyone real, I can’t trust a single soul. Everyone is forever wanting to undertake you, I was on drugs, I was so fucked up but ok my dad dragged me out of it, he helped me but he threw me into a another situation. I am grateful for him helping me, I would wake up in in different countries, different people, different lines to snort off. My dad was like I am done with you, cut everything off. I am his eldest in his eyes, I am the one to take this all on and I was slipping. He got me back but I ain’t going to lie and say this shit is lonely, nobody cares to mention how are you feeling. Only thing I get asked, where was you? Why you not at that meetings, why is the money not coming in. Nobody cares, for you to care, for you to just say it. I just want to cry, I would drop it for you. I want you to be a surgeon, I want you to succeed and I wouldn’t want to get in the way of that either. I have some shit I need to do and tie up but I would drop it all for you” Robyn is pouting at me, I know she don’t like hearing it “I don’t like to know you took drugs like that, especially when you’re a good hearted person. I see the good in you shining through to me, I really can’t believe you was doing that kind of thing but I am guessing money is just there for you. When you don’t have love at home you go elsewhere, you seek love somewhere else and when you don’t find it you feel lonely, the only way to stop it is by filling that void. I get it though, this is why I am always here for you” bringing her hand over to me, pressing a kiss to the back of her hand “this is why I want to long term be at home for you, our home. I don’t want it to be like you said, if we have kids. You want me there, I want that. We going to have to plan but right now, I can hear the bed calling. You and I” I am going to have my last night inside her “I know, I want to sleep too” she assumes she is going to sleep.

#chrianna ff #chrianna #fanfic #fanfiction

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bellamyblinkingrapidly · 6 years

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Oathkeeper Jon Snow? Analysis of Jon’s little speech about lies at the dragonpit

At the dragonpit, Jon says this:

I’m not gonna swear an oath I can’t uphold. Talk about my father if you want, tell me that’s the attitude that got him killed. But when enough people make false promises, words stop meaning anything. Then there are no more answers, only better and better lies, and lies won’t help us in this fight.

And as a political!Jon fan, I’ve always been kinda hung up on it. I see a lot of people use parts of this to demonstrate he could be talking about himself like “better and better lies.” Sure, he could be totally lying here and almost making this speech to both cover his ass and judge himself.

But it’s not like Jon Snow to say words that don’t mean anything. It’s absolutely not like Jon Snow to bring up his father, the most honorable man he ever knew, if he doesn’t mean what he’s saying. He wouldn’t drag his father into a lie - I don’t think. It’s like when people swear on their father’s grave.

So! a new theory I have depends on the specific word he used: “oath.” We didn’t see him say an oath to Daenerys. We didn’t see him even pledge full fealty to her. He said some casual words “My queen” “I’d bend the knee, but--” Even in front of everyone in the dragonpit, no oath or pledge is said and no knee is bent. Perhaps it could happen off-screen, but it’s a pretty deal to have something like that happen off-screen.

I also could not find an “oath” that would be said when one bends the knee. It’s more so called pledging fealty, and I couldn’t find a pledge even. If you can, let me know!!

But when have we seen Jon say an oath before? That’s right...

"Night gathers, and now my watch begins. It shall not end until my death. I shall take no wife, hold no lands, father no children. I shall wear no crowns and win no glory. I shall live and die at my post. I am the sword in the darkness. I am the watcher on the walls. I am the shield that guards the realms of men. I pledge my life and honor to the Night's Watch, for this night and all the nights to come."

Obviously, he’s broken this oath. He left the NW and said his watch has ended because when he died he was relieved of this oath.

But from his conversation during the wight hunt:

Beric Dondarrion: We both serve the same Lord.

Jon Snow: I serve the North.

BD: The North didn't raise you from the dead.

JS: The Lord of Light never spoke to me. I don't know anything about him. I don't know what he wants from me.

BD: He wants you alive.

JS: Why?.

BD: I don't know.

JS: That's all anyone can tell me, i don't know. So what's the point of serving a God that none of us knows what he wants.

BD: I think about that all the time. I don't think it's our pathos to understand. Except one thing: we are soldiers. We have to know what we're fighting for. I'm not fighting so some man or woman i barely know can sit in a throne made of swords.

JS: So what are you fighting for?.

BD: Life. Death is the enemy. The first enemy and the last.

JS: But we all die.

BD: The enemy always wins and we still need to fight him. That's all i know. You and i won't find much joy while we're here. But we can keep others alive, we can defend those who can't defend themselves.

JS: I'm the shield that guards the realms of men.

BD: Maybe we don't need to understand any more than that. Maybe that's enough.

JS: Aye. Maybe that's enough.

I think this is very telling of where Jon’s allegiances lie. He serves the North. He fights to defeat death (literally the risen dead and the WW) and protect the innocent. He still feels a responsibility to the Night’s Watch and what they stood for, and he doesn’t give two shits about a crown and who sits on a throne.

The fact that he literally quotes the oath he made to the Night’s Watch one episode before he make this speech about an oath. Well... the obvious oath you think he’s talking about is saying he’ll stay neutral in the war/pledging allegiance to Dany. But it could be he’s instead realized he still wants to live by the oath he made to the NW to be the shield that guards the realms of men. He had this deep conversation about why he’s alive again, and this segment of his former oath kind of became his reason.

Another side note I have about this speech at the dragonpit he gives is that it comes almost right after Daenerys gives him her word. She says:

We are going to destroy the Night King and his army. And we’ll do it together. You have my word.

This is what Jon has been waiting for literally all season. This is all he’s wanted. And he’s had to almost get killed, get a wight, lose a dragon, and have Dany actually see the WW to get to this point. But where are they? On a boat still going to KL to make a truce with Cersei that is pointless, and still he knows, if that truce can’t be made or won’t be honored, Dany might go back on her word or “postpone” helping to fight with Cersei.

Remember what Jon says?

I’m not gonna swear an oath I can’t uphold. ...But when enough people make false promises, words stop meaning anything. Then there are no more answers, only better and better lies, and lies won’t help us in this fight.

Dany’s made a false promise. Her word doesn’t mean anything.

Jon knows this. He’s seen how volatile she can be. He’s seen her make rash decisions and abandon her allies. And she gave her word out of grief and a desire for revenge -- it was an emotional decision.

We also know her word didn’t hold up because the second that Cersei refuses to accept the armistice, she’s going back on her word. She’s already thinking about how she can’t leave the South wide open for her enemy by going North to fight the Night King. She’s still too obsessed with having the throne.

As for “Lies won’t help us in this fight”

It might be commentary that he needs Dany to be honest about the help she’s going to give if they are going to survive. He can’t depend on her forces and then have them brought back South right from under him. He also can’t waste all his time here with her, trying to convince her, instead of at home preparing everyone for what’s coming.

This line could also be referring to Cersei. Jon might be making the same mistake as Ned in thinking Cersei has any sort of moral compass. This could be a desire for Cersei to be honest as well (even if he knows she won’t be). If she makes a truce and then breaks it, it will hurt the fight because Dany could leave it.

Then there’s the big old “BUT” Did you catch it?

Remember Jon says...

If you subscribe to the idea that Jon could be using this fun little saying from Ned to help him craft his lies, then you might look at this speech a bit differently. It might be a stretch, oh well, here we go...

This idea would imply that Jon WOULD swear an oath (bending the knee to Dany) he can’t uphold. Perhaps then the acknowledgement of Ned is remembering what father used to say and/or a nod to how Jon is going to handle things differently and NOT GET KILLED.

Then this could be Jon admitting that he made a false promise because he knew that Daenerys did and he knew that Cersei would. So now they are only left with better and better lies - hence him continuing with his supposed bending the knee ruse in public.

In this way, it almost reads like “I’m not gonna swear an oath I can’t uphold but when enough people make false promises...” as if his lies are justified by the lies from other people. He knows he can’t be honest in this game because the players he’s facing aren’t being honest either.

And the final line: “And lies won’t help us in this fight.” could be Jon realizing his lie didn’t work, didn’t gain any progress toward getting Dany North. It actually backfired because he loses the Cersei armistice deal (which Tyrion then secures even though it’s POINTLESS). It could also be again a realization that all the lies being told to him, by him, are weaving a mess that is wasting time and will interfere with the real war in the North.

I think it’d be cool to analyze the dialogue he speaks to Theon about making the right choices with some of these theories and ideas in mind. Maybe that will be a Part 2.

#political!jon #political!jonsnow #jon snow #gots7 #I'm not gonna swear an oath I can't uphold #I am the shield that guards the realms of men #You have my word #Lies wont help us in this fight

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