#I mean from the moment I woke up at 9am until even now

[tchotchkez]

🥲

[thewayitalknj]

Part 3 ;  A continuation from my blurb which can be read here.

Quick Notes - Well, I wanted this to be the final part but I felt it was getting too long so...Enjoy! :)

------

Your baffled. Bewildered. Unbalanced. Because in this moment, you realized, once again ; you are left alone with Eddie.

"What do you mean they left?" You began to walk closer.

"They..." He shrugs. "Left."

"And where did they go, exactly?"

"Dunno."

"Okay Eddie, this isn't making any sense nor do I understand. Why would they leave us..." You grit your teeth. "...alone?"

"Maybe they had some errands to run back in town. They really didn't go into detail."

You step up to the counter, taking a seat across from him. "At 9am?"

He shrugs, again.

"They just said they were going to be out of the house for a few hours."

"How will we know they're safe-"

"I'm sure they'll be fine." This whole situation is odd and off to begin with. Why would you friends leave you alone...AGAIN...after you kindly asked them to STOP?

"Okay, okay fine." You step off your barstool chair and make yourself a cup of coffee, turning to Eddie. "So, what do we do today?"

------

As much as you were annoyed with your friends once again pulling another trick, you were in a way thankful. You've always had this small daydream of spending the day at Lovers Lake with Eddie and now it's happening. Thank your lucky stars.

Hell you were even thankful your alarm woke you up so early. You spent the first part of your morning drinking coffee while watching Saturday Morning Cartoons.

You spent the afternoon swimming, eating lunch by the dock.

By midday afternoon you found yourselves on the kids playground, kicking your legs as your swings took you higher and higher.

"Are you gonna jump?" Eddie yells from your left.

"Only if you do!"

"Alright then. 1....2...3!" You both leapt into the air. You landed on the sand first with Eddie trampling over you, both of you laughing hysterically into the humid air. "We still got it after all these years huh?"

"We sure do." As you look up at him, he looks down at you. Even with the overcast clouds above Eddie's eyes still sparkled with the bit of sunlight left.

You've never been this close in proximity before, it almost feels like time stopped. You both begin to catch your breath as he moves himself closer, and closer and closer. Just as your noses touch, eyes closed, mouths just inches away ; thunder claps across the sky and the rain begins to fall.

"Shit, come on!" Eddie screams as he helps you up, both of you sprinting back to the cabin. As you enter back in you switch on the lights and grab some towels from the spare closet.

"Well that could have been worse." Just then the lights flick a few times and then drown out. You both share a look ; "....I spoke too soon huh?"

"Guess so. Are there any candles in there?"

-------

You lit a few candles, made a makeshift lounge in the middle of the living room filled with blankets and pillows, had cereal for dinner. You thought the almost kiss was long forgotten, that maybe it was just a spur of the moment type thing.

After playing every board game you could find, you now found yourselves playing 2 Truths 1 Lie. Anything to pass the time at this point.

"I feel like it's been forever. What time is it?" You asked, shifting your position.

"It's past 10 now."

"Okay, it's your turn."

"Alright...I stole a cassette tape from Ralph's Record Store-"

"That's true, because it's happened on more than one occasion."

"Okay damn-"

"You're gonna have to try harder than that Munson. I know you too well."

He rolls his eyes as he thinks. "When I was 8 I took in a stray cat and hid it from Wayne until he found her in his laundry. Had to give her up because Wayne swore he was allergic but I think he was lying."

"Hm, what color was the cat?

"Gray, with white on her face."

"Her? So what did you name her?"

"Vixen."

"Ha nice. Okay. One more, what's the last statement?"

Eddie thought to himself, the whole reason everyone left was for him, for you. It was his idea, why would he back out now?

***

--The Night Before--

“Dude, you gotta tell her.”

He knew, he always knew how he felt about you ; and now he feels like a fucking idiot.

"Wait, tell her what?" Steve perks up, looking around the room. Everyone's eyes went from Jonathan to Eddie in an instant. "Oh shit, please tell me he means when I think he means."

Eddie slowly nods his head.

"You're in love with her?" Nancy whispers. He nods again. "Did, anyone know?"

"Just Jonathan and Argyle." Eddie answers, pointing to his friends.

"What?! Why didn't you tell us?!" Robin exclaims. Everyone "SHHHH's" and looks upstairs.

"Because you and Steve can't keep a secret and Nancy would have just told Jonathan anyhow. Argyle just...I just knew he wouldn't tell anyone." He looks down at the floor, ashamed he never said anything in the first place. He should have, they were his friends. But you were his best friend.

Argyle speaks up from the counter while popping in a marshmallow from the pack you threw down earlier, "Yeah and it's been hella hard. I've been rooting for you since we started leaving yall alone together every time we hung out."

That's when Eddie's head shot up. Looking up at his friends, one by one. "And that is exactly what you're going to do."

Everyone looks at him confused. "Do...what?" Robin questions.

"What you always do, leave us alone."

***

You snap your fingers in-front of his face. "Eddie? Hello? You still there? Come on it can't be that hard to think of a third statement-"

"I'm in love with you."

Quick Notes - Part 4...Coming Soon?

Click Here to Read Part 4

[v--143]

BACK AGAIN

JUST READ THE NEW FIC AND LIKE-

I LOVED IT, LEE SEUNGMIN DEFINITELY HAS MY HEART

How are youuu??? How you been doing???

I actually came this time cuz I wanted to ask you for a fic if you're ok

Could ask for a Lee Han and Ler Minho fic??

Maybe a pt2 of the first fic you posted?? (The one with Lee Han and Lers Minho and Lix)

Thank youuuu, I hope I don't bother you and that you're great!!<3

-🐹

YESSSSS this is my first part 2 to something so I hope it turns out alright 🙏🏻 and I’ve been great! I hope you have too ^^

< Consequences pt.2 >

[Lee! Han (a bit of IN too)]

[Ler! Minho]

———————————————————————————

It was the morning after Han got so brutally attacked by Minho and Felix. While the tingles had left his body, he still felt them ghosting over some areas, and the need for revenge was even stronger. Did he want to get revenge because he was mad at them? No. Would it be so fun though? Absolutely.

Felix was out of the house for the day due to his schedules, lucky for him. Most of the members were gone actually, one of them not being Minho. Perfect.

Han stretched his arms out in his bunk bed and got up. It was 9am so Minho was most likely still in bed after the fanmeet the day before, Han only woke up early due to his alarm he didn’t mean to set. It did end up helping him and his idea of a prank though.

Since he was up before Minho, he began to ponder on what he could do to get the older back. He didn’t get scared too easily and he was smart enough to suspect anything if Han tried to act. It had to be something quick that would happen right as he woke up.

Or… something that would affect his precious morning routine. That was perfect.

Han came up with the perfect plan. Lino would typically use his signature cheese when making his morning grilled cheese. Han lightly hopped off the top bunk and tip-toed to the kitchen. He took the cheese Lino used for his morning sandwhiches out of its original container, putting it in a ziploc bag and hiding it in the very back of the fridge behind some other items. He took the now empty cheese bag and, quiet as a mouse, placed it on the nightstand inside a sleeping Jeongin’s room.

Tip-toeing back to his room, Han smiled as he simply played on his phone and awaited the screams of despair to come.

-

Lino was exhausted after the meet yesterday. He stretched like a cat in bed and threw the covers off. It was only 10am, but he was so hungry he could’ve eaten just about anything. But why eat just anything when a grilled cheese sandwhich is an option!

He made his way to the kitchen in an attempt to not wake the maknae or Han up.

“Poor guy” Lino laughed to himself remembering the events of last night. Sure, they may have gone a little bit far, but it wasn’t anything Hanji couldn’t handle. Still, he felt a little bad. Maybe he would buy him some snacks later-

“What..?” Lino whispered to himself when he didn’t spot his cheese container in its usual spot. He searched the fridge a bit more but couldn’t seem to spot anything at all.

No way this was Han’s doing, he was definitely still tired from everything that happened yesterday, and no way he’d have the guts to get back at him like this. He still silently checked on him in his room to see him sound asleep in bed, no cheese container in sight.

“Weird..” Lino thought. No way IN had taken it, he knew better then to do that-

Minho was greeted with his cheese container atop IN’s nightstand when he entered his room.

More for Han’s sake then for anyone, he shut IN’s door before the screaming began.

-

Han had his ear to his door the moment Minho walked out after believing he was still asleep. Not one minute passed until he heard IN’s loud screams of laughter down the hall. It was a mixture of pleas and begging and trying to convince him it wasn’t him who stole the cheese. Minho clearly wasn’t having it, considering IN’s laughter did not stop once.

“IT WAHASNT ME” Han heard from down the hall. The poor maknae was getting absolutely destroyed right now.. oh well.

“WHO else could it have been. WHO?! WHY did you take MY cheese?!” Minho yelled out both furious and amused.

“HAHAN! IT WAHAHAS HAHAHhan” IN yelled out one last time until he fell into a deep, silent laughter.

Or so Han thought.

In reality, Minho had temporarily stopped his attack as he urged IN to explain. IN said he had heard Han shuffling around in the kitchen earlier when he woke up to go use the bathroom.

“Goho check the fridge I bet the cheese is ihin there somewhere” IN said with some residual giggles spilling out, “and you owe mehe an apology and gummy bears later for thihis!”

“Yeah yeah okay I’m sorry Ayennnn~” Minho said as he ruffled his maknae’s hair, “go back to sleep.. I’m about to beat the shit out of this guy.”

-

Han still had his ear to the door, trying to listen in. He couldn’t even hear them anymore. Was Minho even still in IN’s room?

Han waited a couple more minutes until he finally cracked his door open, coming eye to eye with a very mischievous and angry looking Minho.

“Hello.” Minho said bluntly.

“Good morning” Han ‘yawned’ while stretching his arms, “you’re up early! Already eat your sandwhich and everything ..?”

“No actually I haven’t had the chance to.”

“Ahh well…” Han shrugged as Lino shot daggers with his eyes.

“Yeah yeah… anyways I’d like to know what this was doing in the very back of the fridge?” Minho said as he pulled the ziploc bag filled with cheese out of his back pocket.

Shit.

“Oh did you transfer the cheese from the container to a bag? Why? That doesn’t seem helpful. Is it? I’m not very updated on kitchen tips… or food tips for that matter, does it make it more fresh? Or is it like-“

“You’re blabbering. It was you wasn’t it” Minho said not as a question but a statement.

“No no I would never do something like THAT“

“Then who? It wasn’t IN, he’s the only other in here.”

Han had nothing to say. Just stared at Lino with wide eyes.

“You made me attack our maknae, miss out on my morning grilled cheese, and now I’m gonna have to spend the rest of my saved up sleep energy getting you back”

“Uhmmm no, no, no you don’t you can skip that last part that’s not necessa-“

Lino pushed his way into Han’s room and locked the door.

“Wait-!” Han said loudly as he held his arm out at Minho and got on the ladder of the bunk bed.

“If you tickle me right now I will fall off and bust my ass on the floor. And you will be paying my hospital bills.” Han said sternly yet with a smile.

Minho smirked at him, “I’ll wait.”

A few seconds passed.

1 minute of them staring at each other.

Now 2.

Han turned around quickly and sprang onto the top bunk, Lino right behind him. The moment Han was off the ladder, Lino jumped onto the bed and grabbed Han by his collar.

“You never learn do you Hanji?” Lino said as he held Han’s collar mere inches from his face.

“DOHONT HURT MEHEHE” Han whined out dramatically. Lino rolled his eyes and swiftly pushed his chest off the side of the bed.

Han screamed as he thought he would fall all the way down until he realized Lino was sitting on his thighs. Han’s whole torso and arms was hanging off the top bunk, making his world go upside down.

“The blohohood’s gonna rush to my head ooohh man let me UP” Han laughed, already anticipating what was gonna happen.

Lino just smiled to himself. He had the wide expanse of Han’s torso all to himself, and he didn’t even have to worry about holding his arms down since half his torso was literally hanging off the bed. Han was definitely too tired to use his ab strength to pull himself back up, so Lino was home free.

“Any final words? Apologies? Any I’m Sorry’s before I-“

“DOHONT PLEEEASE please pleeease” Han begged in anticipation. He desperately tried to use the momentum of his arms by swinging them back and forth to get himself to sit upright, or his pure ab strength, neither of which worked since he was still so exhausted from yesterday. Great.

Lino wasted no time in poking around the younger’s sides. Han simply crossed his arms and refused to laugh and give in to Lino’s attacks.

“Oh I’M getting the silent treatment? Really.” Minho said with a smirk.

“Mhm”

“Reeeeally” Lino elongated the word as he began to scribble at the very bottom of Han’s stomach in quick little movements.

“Mhmhmhmhm” Han giggled with his lips and eyes sealed shut, still hanging off the bed.

“Stubborn are we” Lino laughed as he knew there was no way Han could resist with how sensitive he was.

So he plunged his hands under his shirt.

“MmhmhehEHEY HEHEY NO STOHOP” Han screamed as Minho tickled all over his stomach and sides and his small waist. Han tried to push at his hands with his own, only to find that he could barely even reach them in his position.

“PLEHEHASE! STOAHAP NOOAHA HYAAAHAHA” Han laughed as he threw his head back and swung it side to side in a desperate attempt to alleviate the tingles at his torso.

Lino tazed at his ribs hard. The younger kept squirming from side to side Lino went at him with no mercy.

A minute passed of nonstop pokes and scribbles and squeezes.

“You want me to let you back up?” Lino asked a red faced sweaty Han.

“Y- yeheaha” Han panted.

“Okay!” Lino said as Han handed him his hand. He hoisted him back onto the bed and quickly stuck his hand under his arm.

Han screamed and tucked himself into a ball on the bed, Lino’s hand still securely wiggling under his arm. Han just shut his arms down by his sides and laughed out.

“Cuteaahh~” Minho cooed, “sit up right” he said as he took his hand out.

Han was panting on the bed, still rolled into a ball. “Whahat?” He asked.

“Sit down on the bed.”

Han did as told, arms out at his defense still.

“Turn around”

“Ahabsolutely not” Han laughed nervously.

“Either you do it or I get you even worse” Lino said.

Han nervously did as told and put his back to Lino.

“Good, now spread your arms out to your sides.”

“WHAT?”

“Like on the titanic yknow that one scene” Lino giggled.

“No! You’re gonna gehet meeehehe” Han whined as he giggled and wrapped his arms around his torso.

“Do it!” Lino said as he took fistful of Han’s hair and shook it playfully.

“I’m scahared”

“You’ll be more scared if you don’t do it and I give you a countdown. You don’t wanna know what happens when I get to 3”

Han slowly began to lift his arms up by his sides. He slammed them down a couple of times but eventually had them fully stretched out.

“Wow you actually did it” Lino said.

“Wait, that was it?”

“Yes- well, no”

Lino plugged both his hands deep into Han’s underarms as he screamed loud enough for IN to hear and laugh all the way from his room.

“NAHAHAHA AAAHHH” Han screamed as he fell back into Lino’s lap and his body shook with effort of getting the tingly feelings off of him.

Lino smiled down at the younger as he attacked him. He looked insanely cute when writhing like this as some mere touches.

“Awwwwwe~”

Han’s face reddened even more as he kicked out on the bed.

“IHIHIT WAS JU- UAHAHA JUHUST CHEHEHESE”

“No, it’s the principle of the matter that you tried to get back at me for something you started. Or maybe you wanted me to get back at you? Is that why your so called ‘prank’ was so bad hmmm?”

“HEHEY IT- AHAHAHA” Han threw his head back in laughter and smiled his gummy smile with crinkled eyes.

“Hm? Didn’t catch that” Lino smirked.

“FUHUCK YOU”

Lino gasped and hoisted Han up by his underarms that he was still attacking, then plunged his mouth into the side of his neck screaming.

“THAT WASN’T NICE” He yelled into the younger’s neck as he began to nibble and wiggle his nose into it. Han followed with a series of squeals and tears running down his face.

“I didn’t hear you denying the whole ‘wanting this’ part of my argument~” Lino teased.

“SHUHUT UP! MY PRAHANK WAS AMAHAZIN- AHAHA STOHOP! DON’T DON’TAhahahehha” Han began running out of breath and losing his stamina quickly.

Lino took his hands out from under Han’s arms and hugged him around his waist, Han still in his lap. He put his mouth on the side of Han’s neck as he spoke.

“Awwwwe was it too much? Too much for the Han Jisung? Awwww” He swung him side to side as he teased his neck. Han squealed and shut his eyes as hard as he could.

“Yohou’re actually teheribble!” Han squealed.

“Who hid my cheese.”

“Don’t eheven”

Han let his body fall to the side and wrapped his arms around Lino’s that were still securely around his waist.

Before crawling off the bed, Lino put his mouth on Han’s ear.

“Try to get back at me again… and I won’t stop until you’re out”

Somehow, Han knew he meant it. A shiver went down his spine as he got butterflies from imagining the feeling of being shown absolutely zero mercy until you’re unconscious, forced to laugh until you can’t laugh anymore and fall into a deep grin-filled sleep.

He put it on his bucket list.

———————————————————————————

Minsung Minsung Minsung ＼(^-^)／ ＼(^-^)／ 🩷

[kabillieu]

Broken record, but this week has been very hard. Yesterday I was on the go from the moment I woke up until 9am. I know this is normal for some people, but it's not normal for me. And usually I build in breaks so I can decompress throughout the day. Like right now, this is a break. Anyway, there's a giant chance today and tomorrow will be even worse because Dominic is flying again, and it's likely that his plane will be diverted to Arizona to avoid bad weather here. This means that I'll be on my own tonight and all day tomorrow. My big kid doesn't have school, so he'll have to come with me to work, and I'll have to drop my baby off at daycare first, which will double my commute time. So, instead of it taking an hour to drive to work, I'll have to budget two hours.

I also have a parent teacher conference at 3:30 today, which cuts off my working day, and I have a lot to do, so much.

I have never wanted this level of busyness. It's a big reason why I decided not to have another kid. But then so many crazy, big, unexpected things happened to me. I'm glad this new baby is here. He makes my life better. And this is a phase and a blip in many ways. Babies grow up, and Dominic does not usually fly. That's not his primary job anymore.

I'm going to survive this week. Just like I survived last week. In the meantime, for breakfast I ate leftover black beans and sweet potatoes heated up with cheese, salsa verde, sour cream, and an egg fried over easy. Love that for me. I'm going to do the last of this awful course design, try not to think too much about everything that's being left undone, and just get through this day and then get through tomorrow too.

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 3102

this is 1034 times 3.

i got up early today, got ready early, and brought joel in to work this morning. then i stopped at starbucks and went to work, where i sat in the parking lot on the phone with discover student loans getting my loans put on forbearance again because i simply do not make enough money. good news is we were successful and i got that all done before going inside. i was in at work by 9am.

basically right away i started helping people, even before i was supposed to be on the clock. but i figured screw it, might as well help since i'm here. so i did. and then i didn't have people leave my table until 3:45pm. nonstop for six and a half hours. i eventually was able to eat some tuna so o could get some protein in my system, so that was good, but i also ate a bunch of chocolate.

i made plans with some coworkers for tomorrow or thursday and then next tuesday, so i'm excited for those.

i also managed to catch up on filling out reports, which was good. i intend to be better at filing reports this year. so far so good.

after work, i got joel and we came back to the house. i learned friday is gonna be in the negatives, so the big bottles of water were brought in to keep them from freezing. in the meantime i went and took a nap because i was exhausted and 90% overstimulated and needed a goddamn break.

when my alarm went off i hit stop. joel came in shortly thereafter to ask about food. what i didn't realize that "shortly thereafter" wasn't shortly. it was an hour later. i have been so tired lately that i've been basically hallucinating things.

the other day i woke up at like 7:50am because i heard my mom calling me from downstairs. she called me twice, but my voice was sleep-weakened so i texted her instead. i stayed conscious enough to make sure that her phone received my texts and then i rolled over again and passed back out.

i later learned that my texts woke my mom up in the other room. and my texts didn't say what i thought they did. they were, more or less, incomprehensible.

i MEANT to say, "you called me? im still 90% asleep"

and then it was supposed to me "im still sleepy"

and when i realized nothing was right, i went "whatever" and put "zzzzzz" because Z's mean sleeping, right?

mom had no idea what i meant. which makes sense.

so me dreaming something happens and it not happening has gotten more frequent because of my exhaustion.

rip.

after my nap, i woke up and went to find something to eat. i decided on frosted flakes, because that shit slaps, but when i went in search of a spoon, i couldn't find one. the dishwasher was running and there were no spoons in either the drawer or the sink, so i walked around the kitchen in search of a suitable replacement. my consternation at not finding one was palpable.

and then, just when i was ready to give up,

i was blessed by the soup gods, the cereal gods, and the spoon gods alike.

there was a single spoon on the corner of the counter that had not been there moments before.

i looked at it, picked it up, and determined it was dirty, so i washed it so i could use it happily. i sat at the table and ate my cereal and it was really, really nice.

i was still hungry maybe an hour after eating it, though, and j pondered getting mcdonald's. but i made no move, because i was comfortable and i was finally writing again.

and then joel came upstairs around 10 to take a shower and said he hadn't eaten, so i offered to get mcdonald's. he pointed to where his wallet was and said i could use his debit card, so i grabbed my socks and my sweatshirt and my boots and i went to mcdonald's. came back 20 minutes later and we enjoyed hot fresh fries and ice cream and i went back to writing. it's now midnight 41 and we've happily eaten, i've written about a thousand or so words, and joel is sound asleep beside me.

it's been a long and busy and exhausting day, but it's been good.

[m4tthewmurd0ck]

𝐁𝐮𝐫𝐧 ~ 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐌𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐱 (𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞) 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

【 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄 】

click *HERE* to be taken to the table of contents!

word count: 2k

     WHEN MATT FINALLY STUMBLES BACK TO HIS APARTMENT, THERE’S A BRIEF MOMENT OF PANIC. He can hear someone breathing inside, and tries to mentally prepare himself for the worst as he slowly turns the keys in the lock. But once he steps foot inside, he lets out a sigh of relief.

He’d know your heartbeat anywhere.

Walking as quietly as he can, Matt heads to the kitchen to grab a garbage bag before going into the bathroom and making sure to lock the door. Once inside, he quickly takes off his clothes and stuffs them into the bag, shoving it under the sink.

As he takes a shower, his body is still in a lot of pain, so Matt softly scrubs as best he can, hoping that he removes all of the blood.

Once he’s out of the bathroom, he pauses again. After listening to your breathing and determining that you’re still asleep, he puts on sweatpants and a plain shirt. Walking over to the couch, he gently takes you in his arms and walks back to his bedroom, laying you down on his bed.

You’d been up until nearly 3am, doing the pre-planning for your job’s upcoming showcase. So when Foggy woke you up, you’d only gotten a couple of hours of sleep. This ended up benefitting Matt, as you barely stirred when he laid down next to you.

“Matt? What time is it?” You whisper, only opening your eyes halfway. Okay, so maybe it didn’t benefit Matt as much as he thought.

“Shh,” he pulls the sheets over you, thankful that you don’t try to sit up or wake up more. “I’m sorry I didn’t call you, but get some rest, please? I promise we’ll talk when you wake up again.”

You’re still beyond exhausted, and mostly still asleep, so you simply smile and nod before drifting off again, fast asleep less than a minute later.

Around 9am, you wake up again. Still tired, but not wanting to spend all of your last day off in bed, you quickly remove the covers. Just before you’re about to stand up, Matt speaks up.

“Not awake already are you?” You turn to see him stretching, pulling himself up to a sitting position.

“It’s after nine in the morning,” you yawn. “I didn’t want to spend all day asleep. Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you though. You should go back to bed.”

“Waking up in my bed twice in one week, can’t get enough of me huh?”

You roll your eyes, biting your lip to keep from smiling. “I definitely fell asleep on your couch, so I guess it’s you that can’t get enough of me, hmm? Where were you anyway? You had Foggy really worried.”

“Not you?”

“I always worry about you Matty,” he smiles, hearing the nickname you’d occasionally called him since college. “You’ve got new bruises and cuts practically every time I see you, I’m not even looking at you right now because I don’t want to know what new ones you’ve got. What, are you in some kind of secret underground fight club or something?”

He chuckled, thankful that you couldn’t hear his heartbeat. “I’m alright.”

“You really worried us you know.” You sigh again, a little tired, and pretty disappointed. Normally not one to push Matt, you’ve grown concerned. In all the time you’ve known him, he has never ignored you or Foggy like that. Even when he’d be hooking up with a girl, he’d still let at least one of you know that he would be busy and not near a phone.

The only reason you’re feeling like this about him keeping an obviously big secret, is because you know it has to be dangerous. Why is he always injured? Why is there always a new cut or bruise? And why can’t he tell you?

When Matt stays silent, you finally get you and check your phone, responding to Foggy and telling him that Matt is alright. When he asks where Matt was all night, you can only respond with the emoji of a woman shrugging, since he won’t tell you anything.

“Where are you going?”

“Home. Foggy text me a bunch of times, really worried about you. I was too, which was why I got up and came here. And I fell asleep waiting for you. You came home, we now know you’re okay, so I can go.”

“You don’t have to—”

You cut him off, throwing your hands up as if accepting defeat. “Matt something is obviously going on. I can see right now even with the lights off, you’re hurt. I don’t know where you were or how you got those injures, and you’re clearly not going to tell me. I came here to see if you were alright, and you said you were, so… goodbye.”

He wants to tell you. So badly. But once you know, you can’t un-know, and that’s what terrifies him the most. If he tells you and you decide that you want nothing to do with him, he doesn’t know what he would do. But the disappointment and frustration are evident in your voice, so much so that he almost blurts it out. And he can hear you in the living room grabbing your purse, and slipping your shoes back on.

Ignoring the pain, Matt forces himself out of bed and walks to the living room. You don’t say anything, but he can tell you’re standing to the left of the couch. He calls your name softly, “I…”

“You don’t have to tell me whatever’s going on. I want you to, but the thought of telling me is clearly making you uncomfortable. But I’m not gonna sit here and act like everything is just normal and completely fine. I am gonna go though, I have a lot of shit that needs to get done.”

As you put your purse over your shoulder, you stop when you hear Matt let out a soft groan. In the light, his injuries are a lot more obvious.

“Bed.” You speak so softly, Matt hears what you said but still asks you to repeat it.

“What?”

“Go sit down on the bed,” you put your purse down once again. As upset as you are, you wouldn’t be able to concentrate at home knowing that Matt was here like… this.

Matt opens his mouth to ask why, but stays silent and simply makes his way to his bed. He doesn’t know what you’re doing, but he worries that if he says anything more, you’ll just leave.

After a minute, you emerge from the bathroom. You’d retrieved a couple of towels, and the first aid kit under his sink. You don’t even want to know what was in the garbage bag right behind it.

Holding his breath as you approach, Matt realizes what you’re doing only a second before you start. Gently using a damp towel, you begin wiping the dried blood that he’d missed last night. Just little spots on his face and arms.

He realizes how intimate this is, and even though you have no medical training, Matt now wishes that you could’ve been the one to take care of him instead of Claire.

After a few more minutes and careful inspection, you’re sure that almost all of the blood is gone.

“You have to change your shirt again. I don’t know if it’s old blood or you’re still bleeding, but there’s a little bit,” you reach your hand out and gently tap his chest, “here”.

Without thinking, Matt lifts his shirt off over his head and tosses it behind him. He feels a little desperate, knowing your plan is to go home once you’re done helping him. He holds his breath as you clean the little bits of blood on his chest, mentally scolding himself for where his thoughts are right now.

“Whatever you’re doing, just don’t get yourself killed please. I’m telling you right now that if you die doing something stupid, I’m bringing you back to life just so I can kill you myself.”

“Yes ma’am,” Matt laughs, and despite your feelings, you do too. Before he can overthink it, he puts a hand under your chin, tilting your head up and forcing you to look at him.

“Matt—”

“I’m sorry. I know I’m hurting you, and this is selfish of me.”

You laugh, and Matt is pleased to hear that sound.

“If you’re waiting for me to disagree with you…”

“I’m not, I’m not.” He leans his head down so that your foreheads are touching. “I’m really proud of you, you know that?”

“Really?” You pause, unsure of where he’s headed.

“When you talked about art the first day I met you, it was obvious how much you loved it. Knowing you still love it today, and now you’re basically running an art gallery. I think you’ll have your own someday.”

You feel yourself blushing. “I didn’t know you remembered that.”

“Of course I do. I remember that whole day. And I’m not ashamed to admit that I was glad Foggy got up for another cup of coffee, because I got a few minutes alone with you.”

“Matty, where is this headed?”

Matt takes off his glasses. “I wish I could see you right now.” A few seconds later, he leans forward again, and just before your lips connect, his phone begins to ring.

Foggy. Foggy. Foggy.

“You should get that,” you hand him his phone, “he was really worried.”

Mentally cursing Foggy for stopping what would’ve been your first kiss, he reluctantly answers.

“I’m gonna head out,” you whisper, “I really do have a lot of pre-planning for the showcase. It’s a day off but if I do this today it’ll save me a lot of time in the future.”

“Wait, please. Just until I talk to Foggy.”

Once you agree to wait, Matt picks up the phone, stepping into the living room.

When he returns a few minutes later, you stand up again, having sat down on his bed to wait.

“Do you think we could be good together?” Matt asks you. It’s sudden, and you weren’t at all expecting to hear that. It’s an incredibly selfish question, and Matt definitely knows that. But a part of him feels like he has to know your answer.

“I— I think so… but not right at this moment.”

“Why not?” He already knows the answer, but asks anyway.

“Matt,” you take his hands in yours, “you’re my best friend, and one of the best people that I know. I love you, but you have a lot going on right now. It’s clear you don’t want to share any of that, at least not with me. I don’t think it’s fair to either of us to start something when you can’t even fully be honest with me.”

He almost blurts it out again. But he’s already put Claire in danger, and she knows what he looks like. He can’t drag the only girl he loves into this. Part of him is sad that you weren’t the first person to find out. Once he started going out at night, he always imagined that you’d be the first person he told.

“Sweetheart, please I—”

“It’s okay,” although he can’t see you, Matt knows you have a small frown on your face. “I’m not saying I’m going to cut you out of my life, I don’t think I could handle that. But we can’t be… at least not now.”

When you hug goodbye before finally heading back to your apartment, it feels different. And once you leave, Matt lays back down, willing the tears to go away.

His life is so fucked up. And when he thinks of finally trying to make a move with you, all he thinks of is how selfish he is. How could he ask you to be with him right now, with everything going on in his life?

As he lays there, unable to fall asleep, he begins to daydream.

He thinks of a life with you. A life where you and him could be.

i’ve had people asked to be tagged in matt things but i’m not sure if they meant only things from my 200 followers challenge. if you’d like to be tagged in this series, let me know via my ask! you can mention the title of the story, or a character name if you’d like to be tagged in everything written for them :)

[dorotharry]

tiny dancer ; chapter two

Pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader

PROLOGUE | CHAPTER 1 | CHAPTER 3

Word count: 1.7k

Warnings: torture, nightmares, angst, let me know if there's anything else :) 

Summary: After being drafted for the war in 1942, Bucky goes to the ballet a week before having to leave with his best friend Steve. There he becomes infatuated you with the prima ballerina of the show, and he just has to meet you before his last week in Brooklyn is up. He hopes one day you would meet again; little does it know it will be 72 years later.

A/N: honestly I have no clue where I’m going but I’m hoping you’re all still following. There’s still soooo much to go into readers past and yep, it’s gonna take a while but I hope you enjoy this. Please feel free to give feedback, like and repost it would mean a lot! :)

MY MASTERLIST

*gif not mine

1943

Your head felt groggy, as you woke up. Not enough energy from an ounce of your body to open your eyes for the time being. The more your body woke up from the darkness of slumber the more the pounding of aches and pains became less subtle and started to fill each and every muscle. You weren’t sure where you were or what had happened, but you suddenly became aware that your surroundings weren’t familiar. The air was too cool and there was an eeriness from lack of noise.

Finally, you were able to pry your eyes open. The colours swirled around you into one, until they became to create recognisable shapes. Although this wasn’t somewhere you recognised, just as your mind had thought even before getting to look around.

You were laid down on a metal ‘bed’ if you could even call it a bed. The coolness of the metal began to get to you a shiver running down your spine and you attempted to get up. Only to be restricted. It was now when you noticed you had straps holding your ankles, down, but not only this; there was a limpness to your form. In fact, you didn’t have any real connection to your muscles. As if a switch had been turned on in your head you realised, this wasn’t a bed. It was a table.

Suddenly your anxiety rose. In an ill attempt to do something you turned you head groggily to the left, only to be met with machines, and hospital devices. You took in a sharp breath. This definitely wasn’t a hospital so why the machines? Rolling your head to the right with just as much difficultly as last time you were met with darkness. The faint sound of feet shuffling in the distance, and the whirring of more machines.

Almost as if whoever it was had realised you were awake, a bright white light turned on above you causing you to groan from the sudden contrast to the previous darkness. The footsteps became louder, as whoever it was approached you from their hiding spot.

“Ah you’re awake,” the voice started, “you know you gave our men quite a difficult time back there. Are you going to behave this time?”

Your voice barely was able to respond, only a hushed whisper came out, “Who are you? Where am I?” This worked to rejog your memory as you saw flashes of men running after you, as you had leapt from this same table. You had gotten pretty far and fought back fairly well but this place… whatever it was; was a maze. Realising now that amongst being kidnapped and knocked unconscious. Your first attempt to escape was probably why you were in pain all over. A vision of a few men jumping on top of you and beating you unconscious. Again. That must have been why you were tied down this time.

“I think you know the answer to that.” the small man with glasses responded appearing finally out of the darkness. “…We’re HYDRA, and you y/n...” He spoke reaching under your chin in a condescending manner. “…Were firstly going to be a pawn against your stupid Captain America. But you’ve shown promise, something our other soldiers don’t have.  Neither your American ones. My guess is it comes from your ballet training.” He shrugged as he moved away from you, turning and looking for something. Suddenly his hand was on a switch and machines began to rumble.

“Please,” you responded choking on your own words, “please just kill me!” You knew something was coming, otherwise why would be so aloof.

He chuckled at your words as he stood behind you. “The red skull doesn’t want me to do that, he needs more soldiers, and that’s exactly what we’re going to make you.” And with that you saw a metal machine slowly being dropped down over your left eye, and below your right jaw, causing your panic to rise. As quick as the unbearable pain started, so did darkness.

Present day ; 2017

You woke up screaming as the pain of what had happened almost a century ago shot through your entire body. You fumbled out of bed in a sweat like you did most nights. Heading towards your small kitchen in your small apartment. It was filled with greys, no life within in, you felt there was no need, why celebrate a life with no life?

Your life had changed in so many ways after 1943. You were one of HYDRA’S many toys, the many men that surrounded you called you tiny dancer, but not in a kind way, in a misogynistic arrogant way. Most people at that time though saw you as a weapon, something to be feared of, and they should have.

After you had stumbled upon the Winter Soldier on a mission in 2014 working as a freelance agent having cut your ties with HYDRA mere months before hand, it was only a few months when so had Captain America. From what you had heard amongst assassins under the radar living in Madripoor like you, it hadn’t gone well for HYDRA and now the Winter Soldier was nowhere to be found, invoking fear within many who had made themselves enemies to him. But you were sure his best friend would be looking for him. Whilst you had decided to go against helping him, Steve was not that kind of person.

Time had not been kind to you, you were no longer the frail girl who could fall in love in a week. In fact, you weren’t sure if you actually could feel love anymore. HYDRA had to make sure there was no collateral. Still once you saw him that night you wondered how amongst your many years with HYDRA, how you had never run into Bucky: The Winter Soldier. You had heard of the winter soldier, but you never knew it was Bucky behind the ghost of a person. Probably on purpose, HYDRA had been in your mind. Tthere was no doubt they knew who he was to you back then.

Not only did it invoke these thoughts, but it had led to your retirement. Well not your retirement, you were still about 25 years old on the outside, and though nor Steve or Bucky knew you were alive you knew how it felt to be in their position.

Hiding out in your small apartment in Madripoor was where you had spent most of your life since 2014, staying on the down low in case HYDRA somehow re-emerged, looking for revenge on a project they had wasted so much time on. You.  

You weren’t sure why they were so surprised people like you hated them with so much anger. They had taken your life, Bucky’s life and made you weapons against your will. You didn’t hold their values, it was forced upon you.

You shook yourself from your thoughts again. You only got sentimental after nightmares, and the nightmares had been pretty continuous after seeing Bucky those few years ago, so really you were sentimental most mornings. You think it had something to do with seeing him and how it brought back memories you didn’t even know you had.

Reaching for a bottle of water, you took a sip looking over at the clock that read 3am. You groaned, knowing that you’d probably never have a good night’s sleep again. Terrible payback for a terrible past. No sleep for the wicked.

You shuffled yourself back to your room getting into bed and turning on the tv as a way to mindlessly distract yourself until you actually had to do stuff.

A few hours past until it was 7am, and you decided you could at least go for a shower before your day at work. Working at a bar that opened at 9am wasn’t exactly high class living; especially when you had to deal with drunks so early in the day, so it definitely required more motivation than most jobs. You couldn’t do what you were originally good at, dance. And you’d decided you probably shouldn’t be doing what you were trained for. Killing people.

Turning on the shower to allow it to warm up, you rid yourself of your clothes, suddenly aware of how stiff your muscles were after another bad dream. Stepping in you let the water try and wash it away, and though it did help you knew it would only reappear tonight in another form of a nightmare. You closed your eyes sighing in content, and it did last for a brief moment until you heard banging on your front door.

At first you tried to ignore it, but it got louder and more aggravated and suddenly your heart had fell to your stomach, resorting to thinking of the worst that could be behind that door. Getting out you threw some clothes back on. You reached under your bed grabbing your shot gun, holding it close to yourself as you slowly walked towards the door that had started banging again. Times like this you wished you had a peep hole to look through.

You turned on your best poker face and opened the door abruptly to be more hostile. Only you were met with someone you didn’t know, though for some reason you felt you recognised. On the other side of the door stood a woman all in black, her hair was in a blonde bob and for a brief second you thought you saw a reaction flash across her face like she knew you too.

“Is this y/n?” she spoke firmly and with poise.

You raised an eyebrow, “Why?”

“Is it?” she returned her poker face staying on her face.

“Yes.” You huffed, the half-amused face falling from your face, returning back to the glare you constantly wore. “Who are you?”

She raised her hand for you to shake her face accompanying it with a small smile, which you hesitantly took.

“Nice to finally meet you y/n, I’ve been looking for you under Fury’s instruction for a while, my name’s Natasha.”

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Taglist: (let me know if you want to be tagged)

@maybe-a-marvel​ @thatredlipped-classic​ @flightsandfantasy​ @7minutes-tomidnight​ @rebelemilu​ 

[mandoalorian]

Rach could you please do something soft like it’s maxwells birthday and you and alastair plan a small birthday party ( just the three of you) and he is so overwhelmed with love he can’t believe he got so lucky after everything ❤️ then you tell him you’re pregnant.

Also no pressure to write you can totally ignore this 😊

Birthday Surprise [Maxwell Lord x F!Reader]

Warnings: pregnancy, allusions to sex, food mention, mention of infidelity/cheating, mention of poverty

Word Count: 3200>

A/N: It’s April 1st which means it’s officially Max Lord’s birthday! <33 Thank you for all the Max requests people have sent in over the past week. They’ve truly been a joy to write. & Thank you @supernaturalgirl for this lovely request. I hope you enjoy!

Masterlist

Once upon a time, Maxwell Lord had these big, extravagant parties to celebrate his birthday. He’d host at fancy venues and it would be formal, strictly black-tie, and only the elite were invited. But the truth was, he was incredibly lonely. He had no friends, only colleagues and business associates. His wife would hang on his arm, wearing real fur, and Chanel couture earrings, parading around the room, flirting with other businessmen who might’ve been more successful than Max.

He didn’t like his birthday. Growing up, he didn’t celebrate much either. The Lorenzano family could barely afford to buy Maxwell new shoes or clothes that fit, so expecting gifts and parties was the last thing on his mind. Every year though, without fail, his mother would cook him a small cake and light a candle. “Make a wish, Maxwell.” she’d whisper. It was funny how things turned out.

And when he married for the first time, it was his wife who insisted on these big, luxurious celebrations with balloons and music. The attention was nice, sure, but it always felt like it was more for her than it was for him. He’d never say anything though. Just smile and nod. As long as she was happy. She sure seemed happy when Maxwell caught his wife with her tongue down another man’s throat at his 32nd birthday party. Thankfully, that marriage soon ended, and whilst Maxwell swelled with heartache for a good few months, better things were soon to come.

Like meeting you.

About a week before Maxwell’s birthday, Alistair was... hyper, to say the least. It was way past his bedtime, and yet he was bouncing up and down on yours and Max’s bed, clearly trying to get his father to leave the room.

“Daddy, could you go make me some french fries?”

Maxwell peeked up from his newspaper and furrowed his eyebrows together. His son’s question even ruffled you slightly, as you looked up from painting your nails and tilted your head slightly.

“Alistair, it’s eleven at night. No french fries.” Maxwell sighed before looking back down at his newspaper.

Alistair hummed, looking around the bedroom.

“Daddy, did you remember to feed Lady her evening biscuits?”

Maxwell looked up from his paper again, and stared at his son.

“I fed her this evening,” You said, trying to work out what kind of mischief Alistair was getting up to now. “Ali, is everything okay?”

“Of course, why wouldn’t it be?” The six year old replied, and well, it was a fair response. You and Maxwell exchanged a glance before getting back to your business. About ten seconds passed.

“Daddy, can you make me some warm milk?”

Maxwell sighed, this time dropping his newspaper completely and rubbing his tired eyes. “You don’t need warm milk Alistair.”

“But I’ll struggle to sleep without it.”

“I’ll go get you some,” you told the child, but Alistair quickly extended his arm, stopping you before you could get out of bed. 

“No mommy, you’re sick. Besides, I asked daddy.”

You blinked, taken slightly aback. Alistair was a sweet child with wonderful manners, that  much you knew, but even his decorum right now took you by surprise. He was speaking like a fully grown gentleman. Processing his words, you simply shrugged your shoulders before shuffling back into bed and getting comfortable.

Yeah, you’d been throwing up the past few days, in the mornings mostly, but you’d drawn it down to food poisoning. It was sweet how Alistair was seemingly looking out for your health. Maxwell’s gaze flicked between you both but, in defeat, he got out of bed and padded downstairs, into the kitchen to prepare his son’s bedtime beverage. Once he was gone, and you could hear him begin to steam the milk, you snapped your fingers to get Alistiar’s attention.

“Alright Ali,” you sighed, folding your arms across your chest. “What’s going on? Why have you been trying to get your dad to leave the room for the past...” you checked the time on the alarm clock which was positioned on Max’s nightstand. “Half an hour.” Gods he was persistent. Just like his father.

“We need to do something special for daddy’s birthday.” Alistair announced, and as he uttered the words, you already knew that there was no room for questioning him. He and his father were similar in that sense too.

“What do you have in mind?” you wondered out loud. You knew Maxwell’s birthday was approaching, despite your husband never talking about it. You hadn’t even thought of what to get him yet, which was a problem. 

“A party. But not like the ones daddy has for work,” Alistair explained, referring to the many galas Maxwell had hosted in attempt to gain sponsorship and investments for his company. “Like, a small tea party. Just us. All his favourite snacks and the birthday cake granny used to make him when he was a kid. I know it’s his favourite. And balloons and banners and streamers. I can draw a picture. And music. And—“

“Okay okay baby slow down, I see where you’re coming from,” you smiled, pulling Alistair into your lap. “And I like the idea. Do you know if your dad has ever had a small party like this before?”

“I don’t think so.” Alistair replied softly and you nodded in understanding.

“Well, we’ll have to make sure it’s perfect. We can start planning tomorrow morning when he goes to work, okay? But keep your mouth zipped tight Ali, it has to be a surprise.”

———

The day of Maxwell’s birthday started like any other. He left for work at 7:30, his driver waiting for him outside. He graced you with a quick peck on the cheek and told you he couldn’t wait to see you tonight. Now, Maxwell hadn’t uttered one word about his birthday in the past week, but even today, he hadn’t mentioned it. You’d planned on giving him his present this morning when he woke up, but your nerves got the better of you. 

You’d waited to give him this gift for a week already, you could at least wait a few more hours until he got home from work. 

At 9am, your best friend arrived with an abundance of helium balloons, birthday banners and streamers. At 9:30am, you tried to help Alistair pick out a smart outfit, although he was begging to wear one of his new Star Wars Ewok costumes. 

“How can you eat all the cake if you’re dressed as a massive teddy bear?” you asked the boy. He sighed, knowing that you had a point. 

Alistair looked adorable in his button down shirt and pants. You even fished in Maxwell’s closet to find a bow tie, hoping it would complete the look.

“I look like dad.” Alistair mumbled, fiddling with the wonky tie that you’d haphazardly wrapped around his neck.

“Exactly. You look wonderful.” you grinned, enveloping him into a massive hug. 

At 12, you figured it was the best time to begin baking the cake. But to do that, you needed the recipe. When you called Ms Lorenzano, your heart blossomed upon hearing the excitement in her voice.

“Oh darling! Hello! It’s so lovely to hear from you.” she spoke into the phone, and you could just imagine her smile on the other end of the line. It was identical to Maxwell’s. 

“Hello Ms Lorenzano,” you greeted, nervously curling the telephone wire around your finger. “How’ve you been?”

“I was just packing away my groceries. I got the bouquet of flowers you and Maxwell sent me yesterday. They look beautiful on my dining room table. Thank you, darling. They really lighten up the room. How is my son? Is he there?” Ms Lorenzano quizzed.

“Max is great, actually. He’s working at the moment but we were thinking about flying out to see you this weekend. If you weren’t busy? Alistair misses you very much.”

“Oh that would be wonderful! I’ve missed my little cherub so much. Let me guess, a big party planned tonight for my Maxwell’s birthday?” She beamed.

“Not quite. It was Ali’s idea to plan something small - a tea party of sorts. He was telling me about this vanilla frosting birthday cake you used to bake when Max was younger? And I was hoping you’d share the recipe with me. I’d love to try and recreate it… although my baking skills are nowhere near as good as yours.” you giggled. 

“That recipe has been passed down our family for generations,” Ms Lorenzano explained and you felt your heart sink into your chest. By neither law nor blood, you weren’t family. Would she really not give you the recipe? You’d been dating Maxwell for years now. And Ms Lorenzano did always say you were like a daughter to her… “Of course you can have it.” she smiled and you felt  a wave of relief wash over you as she began to list the ingredients.

“Thank you Ms Lorenzano, it was so lovely to speak to you. Max is gonna give you a call tonight. Take care, okay?”

“Okay darling. I send my love. Give Alistair a kiss from his ol’ granny. I will see you Saturday.” 

Now, the smart thing would’ve been to call over the house chef and have her prepare the birthday cake. At least then, it would be void of any errors. But this was strictly a Lorenzano family recipe and the last thing you wanted to do was to disrespect Ms Lorenzano and immediately give it to the house chef. So, you figured you’d give it your best go. At least then it would be sentimental. 

Maxwell was a fussy eater, only eating the most delicious and well presented foods. You weren’t sure if he’d even step a foot near this cake. As you stirred together the ingredients, something wasn’t right. It was lumpy and bubbling and -- no matter what, you just couldn’t seem to fix it. You called Alistair in, who had been colouring in a family portrait he’d drawn, to take a look, but of course, he didn’t know any better.

When the cake came out the oven, it was lop-sided and slightly burned. You figured it would be okay if you just covered it in the vanilla frosting and placed the sliced strawberries intricately on the top. But no. Luck wasn’t on your side today. The strawberries slipped off and the icing was uneven. At least you managed to put the cake on one of the fancy ‘special occasion’ plates. You could just tell Maxwell that it was made with love.

Ali helped you decorate downstairs, which proved to be a challenge. The rooms in Lord manor were extensively sized and tall, but you did your best. 

“Ali, I’m going to quickly get changed okay? Would you do me a favour and bring down your dad’s presents from upstairs? You could place them on the dining room table.”

Alistair nodded obediently and did as he was told. You went up to yours and Maxwell’s shared closet and looked around, trying to decide on what exactly you should wear. You opted on a beautiful, fitted champagne coloured dress that glittered in the artificial lighting. It was one of your favourite gowns and you had worn it last summer at one of Black Gold Cooperative’s charity fundraising events. You knew how much Maxwell loved it too. If Alistair was dressed in his father’s bow-tie, and Maxwell always looked presentable, there was no reason you couldn’t make an effort to look good too. Besides, you didn’t know how long you’d have left before you wouldn’t be able to fit into these dresses anymore.

You didn’t have long before Maxwell was due to finish work. You quickly style your hair and adjust your makeup, before padding downstairs and into the dining room. Just like you had requested, all of Maxwell’s presents were neatly piled on top of the table, courtesy of Alistair.

“He’ll be home any second Ali,” you said, handing Alistair a party popper and adjusting the cone shaped party hat on his head. Alistair was absolutely beaming, his big brown eyes twinkling like starlight as he anticipated his father coming home from work. “Are you ready?”

“Yes.” Alistair grinned.

“Okay. Good. Let’s go find a place to hide.”

Ducking down behind the stack of gifts, you waited for about five minutes in silence, until you heard the front door unlock. Alistair squeaked excitedly, hearing his dad come home and you bit your lip, quietly shushing him but unable to contain your own smile.

Maxwell was surprised when he came home. He wasn’t greeted like he expected to be. Normally, every evening after his shift, you and Ali would run into his arms and envelope him into a hug. The lack of running and hugs concerned Maxwell. The house was dead quiet, and he even found himself wondering if either of you were home. 

When he padded into the dining room and switched on the light, you and Ali jumped out and screamed in unison; “Happy birthday!”

Maxwell froze, his jaw dropping open and his eyes going comically wide. He was presented with an abundance of gifts, a decorated dining room, his son and girlfriend all dressed up, and a questionable looking cake with a wax candle stuck in the top. You and Alistair ran into Maxwell’s arms and hugged him tight.

“Daddy! Daddy! It’s your birthday! Look! We planned a surprise tea party all by ourselves!” Alistar squealed, tugging on his father’s arm.

“I- I- wow!” Maxwell gasped, genuinely speechless. You bit your lip and swayed your hips as you lovingly gazed into his brown eyes. You didn’t know what it was, maybe the fact the whole day was leading up to this moment, or perhaps just an imbalance with your hormones, but you had missed him so much. Just seeing him again made you want to weep in his strong arms. You loved him so much.

“Happy birthday.” you whispered, raising your hand to cup his face. He nudged his nose against yours and you kissed him sweetly. 

“You did all of this for me?” He asked after reluctantly pulling away, still in genuine shock.

“It was Ali’s idea.” you replied, letting your body lean against his. You rest your head into his chest so much so that you could hear the rhythm of his heartbeat.

“You look… breathtaking, darling.” Maxwell hummed, his hand resting on the small of your back.

“Come sit down,” you said, taking his hand and guiding him over to the dining room table. “You have all these presents, and we have cake and music…” 

“The cake…” Maxwell pointed and quirking an eyebrow. “Is that… it can’t be…”

“It is, I called your mom for the recipe.” You confirmed with a nervous smile. 

“I-- don’t believe it. I haven’t had this cake since--”

“I know. Again it was Ali’s idea,” you informed him. Alistair looked bashfully proud as he anticipated the cake cutting. “I know it doesn’t look the best…”

“Are you kidding?” Maxwell asked, cutting you off. “This is the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for me.”

“Would you like to try some?”

“Would I like to try some?” Maxwell repeated incredulously. “Of course!”

You lit the candle and held hands with Alistair and Max as the two of you sang happy birthday. As Maxwell blew out the candle, you told him to make a wish.

“I don’t need to wish for anything. I already have everything I could ever want. Right here.”

Maxwell got a variety of miscellaneous gifts for his birthday. A porcelain statue of a dog, a small desk flag with his company logo on it, a basket filled with biotin supplements, and of course the artwork that Alistair had created earlier in the day. It was a beautiful crayon illustration of you, Max, Ali, and of course your cat, Lady Lord. Maxwell promised to frame it and put it on his desk at work. Little did he realise though, the best gift was yet to come.

Once Alistair was tucked into bed, you and Maxwell decided to settle down and have an early night. All the eating and dancing had exhausted you both. 

“Thank you for today,” Maxwell mumbled, pulling the zipper down your dress. His warm breath fanned over the shell of your ear and you immediately felt butterflies in your stomach. “Why don’t we go to bed, hm?” he asked, peppering kisses down your neck and along your shoulders. 

You knew what he was hinting at, and you wanted it too. Of course you wanted it too. But there was something you had to deal with first. You were so nervous but you knew it was now or never.

“I didn’t give you your birthday present.” you announced, turning around to look your boyfriend in the eye.

“Wh-- what do you mean? You didn’t need to get me anything. This was enough. You-- you, my love, are enough.”

You smiled, rubbing his bicep and finding yourself once again getting lost in his eyes. You took a deep breath and pulled him into the en-suite bathroom. Although confused, Max didn’t say a word, and instead, he watched you in silence as you unlocked the drawer under the sink. It was where you usually kept your cosmetics, but Max’s gift had been waiting in there for the past week, wrapped up in tissue. You took it out and handed him it.

You anxiously watched as he unravelled the tissue, only to be presented with a positive pregnancy test. Your positive pregnancy test. His eyebrows knotted together and you watched his Adam's apple bop in his throat as he swallowed. But then, only seconds later, his face softened and his eyes became glazed with unshed tears. “You’re… we’re…”

“We’re pregnant, Max.” you confessed, confirming his thoughts.

Maxwell choked up and wrapped his strong arms tight around you, squeezing you hard. “Oh my God, we’re really pregnant?”

“Mhm.” you giggled, as Maxwell pulled away and cupped your cheeks with his hand. He kissed you passionately and when he pulled away, his grin was ecstatic.  

“How long have you known?” He quizzed.

“A week.” you admitted.

“A week?!”

You swatted his arm playfully and shushed him. 

“I wanted it to be a surprise. We have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow, to confirm it and everything. But with the sickness and… I can feel it, you know?” You took his hand and placed it against your stomach. “I can really feel it.”

“I love you so much,” Maxwell smiled. “I love you so, so much.”

“Happy birthday my dear.” you replied, guiding him back over to the bed. “I love you too.”

--------x---------

Permanent taglist: @paintballkid711 @supernaturalgirl @phoenixhalliwell @ah-callie @stardust-galaxies @wickedfrsgrl @goth-topic @nerdypinupcrystal @wonderfulfluffer @kiwi-the-first @pedroepascal @castiel-barnes @honeymandos @rocketqueen @ladycumberbatchofcamelot @dybalalover10 @girl-obsessed-with-things @elena-myth @moth-guillotine @pedro-pascal-love @hayley-the-comet @pinkninja200 @maxiarapamaya @autumnleaves1991-blog @artsymaddie @harrys-stan @kennedywxlsh @cripplingmoon @cheekygeek05 @mrschiltoncat @rye-flower @theamuz @persie33 @sleepylunarwolf @martellthemandalor @pedro-pastel @steeevienicks @rrtxcmt @saphic-susperia @ladyjenny19 @readsalot73 @softmedics

[flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash]

Irresistible Danger - Part 54

Synopsis:  After being caught outside the compound on your own, Negan decides to punish you in the best way possible ;)

Words: 3,305

Warnings: nsfw, smut, swearing

ID Masterlist can be found HERE

Masterlist of all my fics can be found HERE

Allies and Foes

You woke up the next morning to an empty bed, the cooled sheets and pillow telling you that Negan had been gone for a while. A quick glance at the clock showed it was almost 9am, and you lazily stretched underneath the red satin, enjoying the ability to sleep in. 

You vaguely remembered Negan waking you up with a kiss to the neck earlier, when it was still mostly dark in the room. He had murmured something about a meeting with his Saviors, and you had responded by turning over and grumbling for him to let you go back to sleep. The last thing you remembered was his low chuckle, and then you were out again. 

Reluctantly rolling out of the ridiculously luxuriant bed (seriously, where did he find such a soft mattress during the apocalypse?!), you started getting dressed. Unfortunately, you only had the outfit from yesterday, which wasn’t the cleanest after being out in the woods, but it would have to do until you returned to your own room. 

The intrusive thought hit that maybe you could leave a few items of clothing here, so that you had more morning-after options for next time. You quickly dashed the thought, not wanting to get ahead of yourself. Sure, you had now spent the past three nights in a row with Negan, and two of those nights had been in his bed, but that didn’t seem like long enough to start moving in items. Just the thought of Negan doing something so domestic as allowing you to start taking over his armoire and bathroom drawers made you chuckle at the ridiculousness of it. 

Though, doing so would mean more events like last night could easily occur, since you wouldn’t have to keep running back to your room for more clothes or other belongings. Your mind flashed to the shower, and what the two of you had done in it the previous evening. How you had gone to your knees and proceeded to blow both his cock and his mind. He had been particularly vocal, his sharp grunts and loud moans echoing off the tiles as he ran shaky fingers through your hair and made you feel like the most seductive woman on the planet.  

Still smiling at the memory, you finished zipping up the boots, grabbed Ricardo, and headed out of the bedroom and across his office to the door. Creaking it open a few inches, you peeked down the hall. Seeing that it was clear, you quietly exited the room, shut the door behind you, and speed-walked down the halls and to the stairwell needed to get back to your room. Letting out a little puff of relief when you made it to your own floor, you slowed down the pace a bit, no longer needing to scurry like a roach caught in the kitchen when the lights turned on. Honestly, the fact that you had yet to run into a Savior or wife while making the morning-after trek to and from Negan’s room was really damn lucky and-

“Hey!”

The sound of a voice just as your hand was reaching out for the door knob to your room caused you to jump about a foot in the air. Whirling around, you saw none other than Maria at the opposite end of the hall, waving her hand in greeting as she came towards you. 

Crap. Couldn’t the universe have at least let you put on clean underwear first? 

Much as you didn’t want to interact with someone at the moment, you couldn’t help but recall the last time Maria had tried to speak with you, in this very hall. It had been after Negan confronted you about the pregnancy test, and you had completely ignored her and rushed past without a word. At the time you had been too emotional to care, but now you knew that she was owed an apology, not to mention the fact that you hadn’t really chatted or hung out with her since the night out at the picnic table. Doing the mental math, you realized that late night conversation had to have been a little over two weeks ago. Yea, you had been a shit friend to Maria lately, and it was totally deserved karma to have her pop up when you weren’t really prepared for social interaction. Well, you would just have to get over it. She didn’t deserve to keep being pushed aside, and you wouldn’t do so to her again. 

Pasting on a grin, you opened the door and gestured for her to come inside. She preceded you into the room and settled on the rickety little bed. You tried to nonchalantly lean Ricardo against the wall, in hopes she wouldn’t ask why you were walking around with a weapon so early in the morning. Thankfully, she seemed too busy scanning the meager surroundings to notice. It had been a while since she was in your space, and you tried to take in the tiny room from her perspective, wondering if she found it lacking. You weren’t sure what the wives’ rooms looked like, since apparently Negan wasn’t keen on them having visitors up there, but if it was anything like the fancy clothes they wore then it was sure to be much nicer than your own room. 

Just thinking about them made a lump of discomfort form in your stomach. It wasn’t as if you had forgotten about the fact that the man you were developing feelings for had a harem of women he called his wives, but it had been a lot easier to push them to the back of your mind when one wasn’t sitting in front of you. 

Not wanting to waste time with small talk, especially when you both were smart enough to know it was a shallow distraction, you dove right in.

“I want to apologize for the other day, when I ignored you. That was shitty of me, and I’m sorry.”

She gave a tiny smile, and you immediately knew that she wasn’t mad. Of course she wasn’t. This was Maria, and she was one of the most forgiving and patient people you had known since the apocalypse began. The fact that she was still willing to even deal with your fickle ass, especially after your last couple of interactions, was proof enough of that. 

“It’s alright,” she replied. “You looked pretty frazzled anyways. Everything okay?”

“I don’t know about everything, but things are alright,” you mumbled, almost hoping she wouldn’t hear the words.

You started picking at a stray thread on the grey cotton sheets, unable to help but compare them to the luxury of Negan’s satiny red ones. Ugh, why didn’t you just stay in his bed all morning, instead. You could’ve enjoyed physical comfort and social isolation there. 

Able to feel the weight of Maria’s gaze, you lifted your head to look at her. As expected, she was watching you closely, the slightest ghost of a smile tipping one corner of her mouth. “What?” you asked, not rudely, but perhaps a bit impatiently. She looked like she knew a secret that you didn’t, and you wanted her to just spit it out already.

“You spent the night with him,” she stated in a gentle tone, and when you jerked in surprise and opened your mouth to say....well, you had no clue what you were going to say, but thankfully she cut you off. “Which means,” she continued with a raised palm, a silent gesture for you to not get defensive just yet, “that considering how negatively you viewed his multiple wives situation, you must also know he stopped sleeping with them.”

Mouth still hanging open, you stared her down for a few seconds before snapping it shut. Making a “go on” gesture with your hand, you waited for her to continue with wherever it was she wanted this conversation to lead. 

She then told you how she had suspected for a while now that the reason why Negan stopped coming to see the wives was due to his interactions with you. Her theory had been confirmed after your late night chat out at the picnic table when you admitted to being in his bedroom, somewhere none of the wives had been allowed to enter.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” you whispered, clutching the bedsheet so tightly your fingers were about to go numb. 

“Honestly? Because you weren’t ready to hear the truth, and I knew you’d have completely shut down at the very thought of it. You still wanted to see him as a monster, so I figured I’d just wait and see how things played out. See if he’d keep allowing you to get close to him, or if one of you would get spooked and run, so to speak.”

You mulled this over. Was she right? If she had told you a couple weeks ago that he had suddenly stopped sleeping with all of the wives, would you have believed it? Doubtful. And even if you had, never in a million years would you have listened to her theory that his drastic change in behavior was because of the few interactions he’d had with you up until that point. 

Much as you hated to admit, Maria had been right to keep quiet about it. Though you did wonder how she thought you had found out. Did she assume Negan had told you? Or maybe she was aware of how Amber had been using Trixie, and had come to the correct conclusion on her own. Maria was intelligent, so there was a good chance she knew more about the goings on around here than people gave her credit for. You wanted to ask how much she knew, but also didn’t want to risk outing Trixie, since she had told you that information in strict confidence.

Instead, you asked, “So now that you think I am ready to hear the truth, is there anything else I should know? Are the others coming up with a plan of how to quietly dispose of me, so that Negan will pay attention to them again?” 

You said it jokingly, but were honestly curious to know how they felt about these recent changes. Amber obviously wasn’t your biggest fan, but what about the others? Did they see you as a threat to the luxuries they enjoyed here? Honestly, if the roles were switched, and they were the ones threatening whatever you had going on with Negan, you’d be tempted to sharpen mini-Ricardo shanks and take them out one by one. Your subconscious whole-heartedly agreed, giving a battle cry and stabbing at the air, as if taking out imaginary opponents, while your brain sighed and rolled its eyes.

“Well actually, we did recently have a group conversation about you.” 

She said this calmly, but it still made your eyes go wide as you exclaimed, “You what?”

“It was a few days ago. Amber had been throwing a real tantrum after she tried to take Negan a dinner tray, and found him already in his office eating with you.”

Oh yea, you remembered that event, vividly. It had been about a week ago, before his last supply run. It was the evening he had confessed to you about his dead wife, and then Amber interrupted by knocking on the door with a tray. It had been apparent she wasn’t happy to see you there, nor to be sent away by Negan, so you weren’t surprised to hear she hadn’t handled it well afterwards. 

Nodding for her to go on, Maria continued. “We let her vent about it for a couple days, since I think we were all hoping she’d eventually let it go the way she does most things that get under her skin. But she was like a dog with a bone this time, and kept running her mouth to all of us about how you were stealing Negan from us, and that if we continued to just sit back and let this happen, we were putting our status here in jeopardy.”

Sweat broke out on the back of your neck at the possibilities of where this story could be going. Just the thought of the wives sitting around talking about you as a potential threat or enemy made your stomach flop, but you stayed quiet and let Maria finish.

“She was really trying to get the rest of us riled up, and then one evening she started telling us all that we better be prepared to start scrubbing toilets for points, since we were willing to just let him toss us to the curb. That was when Sherry finally stepped in and put her foot down.”

“Wait, Sherry?!” you blurted, absolutely shook at this turn of events. 

Maria nodded. “Yep. She told Amber that all she was doing was starting unnecessary drama, and that Negan had never given any indication that we would lose our privileges or have to start working for points just because he isn’t fucking us every night. Amber tried to argue at first, but Sherry held her ground. Told her that she’d gladly go get Negan, so Amber could tell him her concerns face-to-face, rather than continuing to make assumptions behind his back. That shut her up real quick, and she stormed into her bedroom and stayed there the rest of the night. I haven’t heard her say anything else about it since. She’s still sulking around a bit, but at least she’s been quiet.”

Your brain was struggling to take all this in, especially the part where Sherry had not only stood up for you, but done so against another wife. Crap, now you really felt like an asshole for being jealous and internally snarky towards her that day in the kitchen, when she took you to the medic after you cut your finger. 

“Do you actually think she’ll let it go now?” You had a feeling that you already knew the answer, but couldn’t help asking.

Maria sighed. “I can’t say for sure, but Amber doesn’t seem like the kind of person who is okay with not being doted on. I don’t think she has any particularly strong feelings towards Negan, but she enjoys the status of being a wife. It can be a bit of a power trip, to catch the attention of a man like him, even if for shallow reasons.”

“Yea, don’t I know it,” you mumbled under your breath. 

Maria raised an eyebrow, having obviously heard. “I don’t think I’d classify his attention towards you as shallow.” 

Giving a huffed laugh and shrug, you tried to play it off. “Yea, well, is anything about Negan easy enough to classify?”

“Probably not,” she said with a shrug. “But that’s part of what makes him so intriguing, right?”

“If by intriguing you mean confounding as hell, then sure.” 

Despite your annoyed tone, you were genuinely smiling at this point. Part of you wondered if this should feel more weird than it did, talking to a woman who was Negan’s “wife”, and had most likely slept with him, about whatever it was he had going on with you. 

As if reading your thoughts, Maria’s face became more serious. “I hope this doesn’t make you feel like you can’t still talk to me, or see me as a friend.”

If you were being totally honest with yourself, the whole situation didn’t make you feel 100% comfortable, but you were pretty sure that was because of the possessive part of you that wanted him all to yourself. But was that a realistic emotion to even have, with a man like him? Could you be okay with him continuing to publicly have “wives”, even if he wasn’t sleeping with them? And what if he later decided to go back to them? It’s not as if he knew that you were aware he wasn’t sleeping with them at the moment. 

Mentally shoving those questions into the padlocked box with the other unanswered questions, you honestly replied, “I’m not totally sure how I feel about all of this yet, but I definitely still see you as a friend, so no worries on that front.” 

“I’m glad,” Maria said with a nod. “And in case I didn’t make it obvious, no part of me will be upset if Negan decides he doesn’t want to give us the same privileges anymore. Well, so long as you promise to give me a spot in the kitchen, so I’m not stuck scrubbing toilets beside Amber.” 

“Deal,” you said with a laugh, glad that the air had been cleared between the two of you, and that she wasn’t harboring ill feelings towards you for taking Negan’s attention away from her and the other wives. Part of you even wondered if she had spent much alone time with him, since she hadn’t been his wife for very long when he stopped sleeping with them, but some things were just better left unknown. Besides, it’s not like he slept cuddled against any of them all night afterwards, or let them in his bed...or his shower.

Your subconscious was feeling awfully smug at that thought, nose in the air as it strutted around with a superiority complex. Meanwhile, your brain was pointing at the padlocked box of questions in annoyance, a motion which the subconscious purposely ignored. 

You chatted with Maria for a bit longer, the conversation much lighter and more frivolous than before. It felt good to just hang out and discuss random topics, the way you had when the two of you were surviving for weeks out in the woods together. You might’ve each taken very different paths when it came to Sanctuary life, but it was a relief to know that the connection you had formed prior to coming here surpassed those differences. You also appreciated that she didn’t push for more information about you and Negan, and didn't even mention his name again. 

When she left a little while later, a glance at your watch showed that dinner prep was in about two hours. Grateful for the chunk of alone time, you finally changed into fresh clothes and propped yourself up in bed with the copy of Harry Potter. You smiled when removing the little piece of paper you had torn from your notebook as a bookmark. While this one was blank, there was a second little piece of paper that was bookmarking a place closer to the beginning of the book. This piece of paper you had marked in pencil with the letter N, and it held the spot where Negan had stopped reading yesterday morning. You had stuck it in there after he left your room, the book having been face down on your side table where he placed it when you woke up and distracted him. Hoping that he’d return to reading it, especially if you kept his place, you couldn’t help but mark his spot. 

Just the thought of his possible reactions to some of the plot twists had you smiling, at the same time as a devious thought crept into your head. If you made sure to get him hooked on the first book, he’d definitely have to find copies of the other ones in the series to share with you, right? There’s no way someone can read the first book and not need to also read the rest.

Both subconscious and brain nodded in agreement at this theory before cuddling up on either side of you, so that they could also see the opened book. Diving back into the story with a contented sigh, you immersed yourself in the magical world, not planning a return to reality and all the awaiting unanswered questions until it was time to head downstairs for dinner prep.

~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~

[multifandom-girlie]

𝐅𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐞

Imagine: Your parents think your bringing home a boyfriend for Christmas but you don't have one, so you ask someone really nicely to be your fake boyfriend.

Pairings: Human!Klaus x Human!Reader

Warnings: none.

Words: 1895

I was just walking out of Mikaelson Enterprises- where I work as Klaus Mikaelson’s assistant. When I get a call. I look down at the screen and notice an image of my mother pop up. Great. Just what I need after a long day of work. I decided to pick up the phone otherwise she will just hound me.

“Hey Mama. What’s up ?”

“Hello Sweetheart, I just wanted to make sure you were still driving down tomorrow and ask how you are ?”

Crap. I forgot I was meant to be driving home tomorrow.

“Uh yeah, I’m still coming down. Also I’m good, how is everyone ?”

“Good apart from you brother, he got into a fight on his last day of school.”

“Mama, don’t go to hard on him you know he’s having a difficult time at the minute with Dad. I’ll talk to him when I get there.”

“Okay I won’t. Anyway I’m excited to meet this new boyfriend of yours.”

“Uh what are you talking about Mama ?”

“Well you promised you were going to bring your boyfriend home this year so that we could all meet him.”

Shit. When did I say that. Damn my mother for having a good memory at such an old age. What am I going to do ? I could say we broke up….but that would break her heart. Fine. She wants a boyfriend of mine, then she’ll get one.

“Yeah sorry Mama, it must of just flew past me just a moment ago. I’ve had a really long day at work and not much sleep.”

“Are you sure your okay to drive down ?”

“Yeah I'm sure. I gotta go Mama, I love you.”

“I love you, Sweetheart.”

I ended the phone call and stood there debating with myself where to find a boyfriend within the 19 hours before I have to leave. Bearing in mind, I still need to cater to my own needs first like sleep, food and most certainly hygiene. The problem is I can’t just go out on a date and invite him to my parents house. Preferably it needs to be someone that I already know and who doesn't have plans. I’m screwed. I know that everyone I know has plans for christmas. The only person that wasn’t was my boss, but that is in all ways wrong. Even if we have hooked up a couple of times. That’s it, if I promise to sleep with him hopefully he’ll do this for me. God forbid something goes wrong.

I walked back into Mikaelson Enterprises and passed Camille, the receptionist with a big fake smile. She’s hated me ever since she found out I got assistant to Klaus and not her but truthfully it’s because she’s too ditzy and clingy too Klaus, since she has the fattest crush on him but moving on. I got out the elevator, once it reached the top floor where Klaus was. I headed to his door and knocked.

“Come in.”

I opened the door and he looked up from his paperwork with a confused look on his face.

“I thought you’d left Miss Y/L/N.”

“Yeah I did, but my Mom called and reminded me about something. Which is actually why I’m here. Could you please please be my fake boyfriend for the week.”

He looked at me and chuckled. He stood up from his chair and leaned on the front of his desk, just in front of where I was seated.

“Your fake boyfriend for a week ? For what ?”

“Christmas.”

“Where ? Why ?”

“My hometown. Also it’s because my mom thinks I’m bringing home a boyfriend and she’s going to be so disappointed when I don’t bring anyone back.”

“What do I get out of it ?”

“What do you want ?”

“I want to take you out on an actual date afterwards.”

Woah this just went down an unexpected pathway.

“What ? You want to take me out ?”

“Is there a problem with that ?”

“No ! There’s no problem, unexpected is all.”

“Right okay then, I’ll arrive at yours with my belongings tomorrow morning at 9am.”

“Perfect. I’m leaving at 10am.”

I smiled at him and walked out, surprised by what had just happened. Nevertheless, I got home ate my dinner, showered and went to bed.

When I got up the next morning, I brushed my teeth got some coffee and put my bags in the car. Once I was ready I looked at the time, 8:59 am. I heard a knock on the door and thought it as weird that it could be Klaus since it had only just turned 9am. Weirdo. As soon as I opened the door, I led him to my car and drove off just after he had secured himself in.

______________________________________________________________

13 Hours Later

Luckily Klaus was asleep for the most of it, so I just listened to my music and drove. He woke up with around an hour left on the drive, so we actually had a nice normal conversation. As soon as I pulled up outside the house, my mom and dad were stood outside waiting for me. I got out the car and ran to my dad, who has his arms wide open for me. I jumped into his arms and he held me very tightly and kisses my head. I giggled when he spun me around.

“Hi Daddy, I missed you so much.”

“We all missed you so much more sweetheart.”

I pulled away from my dad and pulled my mom in for a tight hug.

“Hi Mama.”

“Welcome home baby ! Now where is he ?!”

“Oh right.”

I ran over to Klaus, grabbed his hand and quickly whispered in his ear.

“Follow my lead okay.”

He nodded and I held his hand and walked over towards them. We stopped in front of them and my mom couldn’t stop smiling, my dad however didn’t look massively impressed.

“Mom, Dad… this is Klaus Mikaelson. My boyfriend.”

“Mikaelson as in Mikael and Esther Mikaelson ?!”

I looked at my dad confused as he said that, how would he know his parents already when me and Klaus weren’t actually dating. I haven’t even met them and they are the owners of the company I work for.

“Uh yes sir.”

“Dad, how’d you know that ?”

“Me and Mikael don’t get along very well that’s all.”

“Right, well it’s Christmas Eve and it’s getting late already Y/N you’ve been driving so long, why don’t you and Klaus go and unpack in your room and then come down and see everyone to drink some hot cocoa and watch films.”

“Okay Mama.”

I took Klaus in and was immediately bombarded by my youngest niece, Skylar.

“Hey Sky, I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too Auntie Y/N, who is this ?”

“Sky, why don’t you give us 5 minutes and then I will come down and tell everyone okay ?”

“Okay Zia.”

I smiled at her, loving the fact she’s started to embrace her Italian side now than pushing it away.

“So that’s why I don’t understand you when your mad sometimes ?”

“What do you mean, Klaus ?”

“I mean, you speak Italian when you get mad.”

“Oh right, yeah I try not to but it’s just natural.”

“So your fluent ?”

“Oh yeah my whole family is, I was actually born in Italy but we moved here when I was 2 for my Dad’s work, since he used to work in the army.”

“That’s quite cool.”

“Thankyou.”

We headed to my room and I started to unpack until I saw him just standing at my door, not doing anything.

“You know you can unpack if you want, I’ll leave you 2 drawers. There’s not much room elsewhere in the house with everyone here. So your gonna have to stay with me.”

“Okay.”

When we finished unpacking, we headed downstairs so I could introduce everyone to Klaus and reunite with my family.

“Hey everybody !”

Everyone turned around with massive grins and I managed to get around and hug everyone.

“Before we go any further, everyone this is my boyfriend Klaus Mikaelson.”

“As in Elijah ?”

What the hell is with my family knowing everyone but him in his family.

“Okay wait, your the second person to mention another one of his family members. Who else knows any Mikaelsons ?”

Three of the eleven-excluding myself and Klaus- raised their hands. My younger sister, my father, my younger brother and my sister’s boyfriend. Eventually, we found out Camilla had slept with his older brother Elijah, my father we already knew had met his parents, Christian used to be friends with Klaus’ younger brother Kol and Blaine used to date Rebekah and while back.

We eventually got over that and sat down as it was late already to watch a film and drink hot cocoa, I felt bad about leaving Klaus isolated from everyone even if Skylar was fussing over him. So I sat next to him on the couch and put a blanket over us before the film started and Skylar relaxed on the other side of me, hugging my side.

Twenty minutes into the film, my nerves from sitting next to Klaus watching films and drinking hot cocoa with my family lessened and I relaxed a bit more. That was until, Klaus put his arm on the back of the sofa and I started to fall asleep-causing me to fall into his side. When my head hit his chest, my eyes opened immediately almost as if they never closed in the first place.

“Sorry, I’m so tired.”

He chuckled and rested his hand on the side of my head bringing it back to his chest.

“It’s fine, it’s what couples do…also you have been driving all day. If you fall asleep, I promise I will take you to bed.”

I looked into his eyes and smiled before I pushed the boundaries I had made in my head and wrapped my arm around his stomach. My fingers brushed against the warm skin on his stomach as his sweatshirt had rode up a bit. I blushed very much and I’m return I felt a chuckled vibrate on my cheeks and Klaus’ hand rest on my hip as my shirt had rode up a little too. I looked up at him and without even taking any thinking time his hand gently but quickly pulled my lips closer to his and pressed them against mine. We made out for a few minutes before pulling away.

“There’s nothing weirder than making out with your boss whilst my 9yr old niece is staring at us.”

We chuckled and looked at her and she immediately averted her eyes.

“I don’t care who’s watching, I’ve wanted to do that for years.”

“Seriously ? Why haven’t you ?”

“I can’t make a spectacle in the workplace.”

“Your such a twat, Thank You for doing this. Your making it hard for me to say no to that date you asked me on. Unless you promise me that is not the last time you kiss me like that because…wow.”

He chuckled and kissed me again. I can quite easily say that I do not regret lying to my mom for once in my life. If it wasn’t for me lying, I wouldn’t have got this opportunity.

MASTERLIST

[wikiangela-fanfics]

“You being there was all I needed” - Buddie oneshot

Yep, it happened. Buddie sucked me in and now I’m writing about them hahaha

It’s my first fic about them, and I’m not necessarily happy with how it turned out, but at the same time I kinda like it XD Hopefully, any new ones I write about them will be better haha

2k words, most of it under the cut cause it seemed kinda long haha

Ao3 here

Enjoy ♥

(also, shoutout @oliverstarkkk for reading and liking it haha your response to this fic gave me enough confidence about it to actually post it ♥ hah)

***

He woke up hearing faint sounds of conversation from the kitchen. He immediately knew that Buck had to come over, since he was the only one who had a key. Then he heard his laughter, which only confirmed what Eddie thought. The only thing he was a little confused about was why Buck was there so early. And why didn’t he or Christopher wake him up. 

He picked up his phone to check the time. It wasn’t even 9am yet. They had a day off after the 24-hour shift they’d just finished. How the hell did Buck get out of bed so early on his day off after a 24-hour shift and having spent the evening before with them?

Eddie stretched, putting his phone away. Then he sighed and got out of bed. He quietly made his way to the kitchen, where he saw Buck and Chris making breakfast. It immediately brought a smile to his face. Buck was so great with his son, and Chris loved Buck so much. 

Eddie leaned against the door frame, watching Buck put another pancake on the pile on the plate, while Christopher was sitting with another plate in front of him, decorating a pancake with fruit and whipped cream that could be seen all over the table.

“What’s happening here?” Eddie asked, and both Chris and Buck looked at him, startled. 

“Happy birthday, daddy!” Chris yelled, laughing. Eddie was a little surprised, as he kind of forgot about it. But in his defense, it was early.

“You were supposed to be asleep. We wanted to bring you breakfast to bed.” Buck said, trying not to smile. 

“Sorry.” Eddie rolled his eyes with a chuckle. He walked towards the table, leaning down to leave a kiss on Chris’ head.

“Happy birthday, Eddie.” Buck said with a soft smile, handing him a plate with the pancake that Chris was preparing on it. 

“Thank you both. You shouldn’t have.” he said, not able to take his eyes off of Buck, whose cheeks got a little pink.

“It was Christopher’s idea.” Buck shrugged. “Now, sit down and eat, Chris made them, I just fried.”

“Oh, really?” Eddie looked back at his son. “When did you learn how to cook?”

“Buck and abuela taught me.” Chris laughed. Eddie could listen to that laugh forever.

“Good. You can cook for me then.” Eddie smiled, taking a place at the table next to his son.

“Buck can cook for us.” was Christopher’s answer in such a tone, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Eddie looked up and his eyes met Buck’s. “Right, Buck?”

“Of course, buddy.” Buck smiled, his eyes not leaving Eddie’s. A long moment passed, with them just exchanging a fond look, before Buck cleared his throat and turned away to start cleaning up after cooking. “So, what are you gonna do today?” he asked.

“Spend the day with you two.” Eddie shrugged. That’s honestly all he wanted to do for his birthday. He didn’t care what they were gonna do, he just wanted to be with Christopher and Buck. “But first would you sit down and eat breakfast with us?” he asked Buck, as Christopher grabbed a pancake and already started eating. “We’ll clean up later.”

“I will clean up.” Buck clarified, taking a place opposite Eddie. “It’s your birthday, you’re not doing a thing today.”

“Fine with me.” Eddie smiled widely. He observed as Buck took whipped cream and poured like half of the bottle onto his plate. Then he poured some straight into his mouth before noticing that Eddie was observing him, and blushing a bit. 

“What?” Buck asked. Eddie just shook his head. He wasn’t going to say that he was staring because he thought Buck was adorable. And he was scared that if he opened his mouth, he would say just that.

“I want more whipped cream too!” Chris exclaimed, and Buck was happy to help.

Eddie just sat there, observing his two boys make an even bigger mess in the kitchen. Fortunately, he wasn’t the one who would be cleaning that.

***

They didn’t do much. They went to the park, played with Christopher on the playground. They got ice cream. They ate lunch. And then they went back to Eddie’s and watched a couple of movies. It was like their ordinary day off, but it was perfect. Eddie had fun and that’s really all he wanted for his birthday. 

When it got late, Buck and Eddie put Christopher to bed together, per his request, and then Buck was about to leave. But despite spending the whole day together, Eddie did not want him to go. So he invited him for a beer.

They sat on the couch, drinking their beers in comfortable silence, until Eddie spoke up.

“Hey.” he said, and Buck turned his head to look at him. “Thank you.”

“What for?” Buck frowned with a little confused smile.

“For today.” Eddie shrugged, taking another sip of his beer.

“We literally did nothing special. It was what we always do.” Buck rolled his eyes.

“Well, you and Christopher were there, so it was pretty special.” Eddie said, not looking at Buck.

“Just wait for next year. I’ll plan something really special.”

“Like what?” Eddie asked with amusement, his gaze back on Buck.

“Don’t know yet. I have a year to figure something out. But it’s gonna be awesome.” Buck leaned his head back on the couch and looked at Eddie.

“I’ll hold you to it.” Eddie smirked, mirroring Buck’s position. So now they were just sitting there with their heads leaned on the back of the couch, staring at each other. “But seriously, today was great. You being there was all I needed. You and Chris.” he clarified and swallowed hard, hearing how it sounded. But the truth was, all he needed was his son and Buck. They were the two most important people in his life, which was kind of crazy because he’s known Buck for such a short amount of time… but as cheesy as it sounded, he believed they were soulmates. He just couldn’t imagine what his life would be like without Buck in it. And Buck was so great with Christopher, and they already acted like a family, and Eddie wondered… what if Buck feels the same? What if he wonders about them too? He never really dared to let himself think that far, but what the hell, it was his birthday and he could daydream a little. Even if Buck was right next to him.

“What?” Buck asked, when Eddie’s smile widened a bit. They kept looking into each other’s eyes, and at that point that wasn’t even weird anymore.

“I love you.” Eddie sighed, lost in Buck’s eyes, and just content to be there with him.

And then his brain caught up with his mouth, his eyes widened, and he started to panic. He raised his head and sat up straight, looking back at Buck with horor.

“You do?” Buck asked, and there was a hint of something in his voice… like hope? He blushed and seemed surprised and a bit nervous, but he didn’t move. He just kept looking at Eddie.

“Yeah.” Eddie breathed. He figured, if he’s already said it, he can’t just backtrack now.

“Okay.” Buck bit his lip, pouring a bit of his beer into his mouth, raising his head a bit to do that, then leaning it back again and looking up at the ceiling. “Good.”

Eddie was confused now. Buck looked confident now, and there was a hint of a smile on his face. “What?” it was Eddie’s turn to ask.

“I mean, I’m in love with you.” he said slowly, glancing at Eddie. “And apparently everyone could see it but you. And me, before I realized, with some help, to be honest, like-” he started rambling, and Eddie cut him off with a kiss. It was quick and rushed, and nervous, it was like testing the waters. “Or we can do that, instead of talking.” Buck nodded, as Eddie pulled away to look at him. “We can definitely do more of that.” he sat up to put his beer away, and then they were making out, more confidently now. 

Eddie could not believe it was happening. He felt like he was floating. Buck was such a great kisser. And their hands started exploring each other’s bodies, and the kiss was getting more and more heated, with a lot of tongue and teeth, and moaning… God, Eddie loved to hear the small noises Buck made.

And then they heard a voice.

“Daddy?” Christopher said, and Eddie and Buck jumped off of each other and looked in the direction of the voice. Chris was standing there, looking at them with an unreadable expression.

“Hey, buddy, why aren’t you asleep?” Eddie tried to play it cool, but his voice was shaking and he was a little out of breath. He ran a hand through his disheveled hair and attempted a smile.

“I can’t sleep. Buck, can you read me another story?” he asked, and for a second Eddie thought maybe he somehow didn’t notice them making out. Which was not possible, but he could hope. 

“Sure.” Buck said, sounding similar to Eddie. Eddie looked at him and saw his red face and flushed lips. He wanted to kiss him again. “Just give me a second and I’ll be right there, okay?”

“Okay.” Chris smiled and turned around. “Oh, by the way.” he added, before starting to walk back to his room. “I’m happy that you two are finally together.”

Eddie and Buck looked at each other in shock. Why the hell would Christopher say that? They were pretty obvious to everyone else, apparently, but a ten year old kid? Well, he might have been more perceptive than Eddie gave him credit for.

“I guess I have to go read him a story.” Buck said, still not moving. 

“Yeah.” Eddie nodded. “I guess you do.” he took a deep breath, his eyes dropping down to Buck’s lips again. “And after you’re back, we will, uh, talk.” he said.

“Talk.” Buck repeated, sounding as if he has never heard that word before.

“Yeah, talk.” Eddie bit his lip, and Buck chuckled, leaving a quick lingering peck on Eddie’s lips.

“Sure. We’ll talk.” he got up. “I’ll be right back.”

And, well, after they made sure Christopher was really asleep this time, they sat down to talk. But it ended up with more making out, and promises that they surely will talk in the morning. 

They fell asleep cuddled on the couch, still half sitting, and their backs were killing them the next morning. Eddie thought it was more than worth it. Because now he got to kiss Buck whenever he wanted, hold his hand, just do all the couple-y things he had wished he could do. And he could tell Buck he loves him, and that was just such a weight off his shoulders that he was carrying for most part of the past couple of years. And the best thing was, his son was completely fine, or even more than happy, than Buck and Eddie were together now. 

***

“Hey, you know what?” Eddie asked a couple of days later, as they were cooking dinner together (well, Buck was cooking, Eddie was tasked with chopping the vegetables).

“What?” Buck asked, stirring in the pot.

“We got together on my birthday.” Eddie frowned.

“Yeah.” Buck looked back at him, an amused expression on his face. “So what? Are you scared that you’re only gonna get one gift from me?”

“No.” Eddie rolled his eyes. “But it’s not fair. Our anniversary should have its own day to celebrate it.”

“Anniversary? Wow, it’s only been a couple of days and you’re already a year ahead.” Buck teased, shaking his head. “How do you know it’s even gonna last?” he asked, but Eddie knew he was joking. They knew that what they had was special and they would fight to keep it. 

“Oh, shut up.” Eddie chuckled. “I just mean…” he drifted off. What did he mean?

“I personally like that it’s on your birthday.” Buck walked over to him. “That way our anniversary is just all the more special, because my second favorite person in the world was born on this day.” he hugged Eddie, hiding his face in his neck.

“Second?” Eddie scoffed, trying to sound offended.

“I mean, I love you, but Chris will forever be my number one.” Buck said and Eddie felt a fond smile tugging on his lips. He loved that Buck loved Christopher so much. 

“I love you.” Eddie said quietly, as Buck raised his head and left a quick kiss on Eddie’s lips. 

“So you’re gonna let this anniversary thing go?” Buck raised his eyebrows. “We can’t just choose another day, that would be cheating.”

“Cheating?” Eddie frowned, a small laugh escaping his lips.

“I would feel bad celebrating on another day.” he walked back over to the stove. “It would be a fake anniversary. Besides, one day maybe we’ll have one on a different day.” he added more quietly, and even shyly. And Eddie’s heartbeat sped up. Was Buck suggesting… that one day he would want to marry him? “But that’s far, far in the future.” Buck added quickly, laughing nervously. 

“Yeah.” Eddie breathed. They just got together, it was a long way to marriage. Although they were technically raising a kid together already… But Buck was right, that was way far in the future. That they will definitely have, because now that he had him, Eddie was not going to let go. 

“You done with that?” Buck gestured to the half-chopped vegetables in front of Eddie, as if the conversation didn’t happen. But he was still a bit red in the face. 

“No, give me a sec.” Eddie said, realizing that he was just standing there for the past few minutes, doing nothing. 

There was no rush. They had time. And they had each other. He could not be happier.

[justatiredpotato]

Set Me Free | Chapter 2

Chapter List

Pairing: hybrid!Yoongi x human!reader

Genre: Angst, fluff, coffee shop AU, hybrid AU

Word Count: Chapter: 7,000~  Total: 40,000~

Updates daily at 10pm MST

Warnings: anxiety, Yoongi’s life has been sad to this point I’m sorry

Summary: Yoongi, a cat hybrid, has been hurt time and time again by a world that would have him believe he’s worthless. One day he finds himself in your protective care, and gets a new family to boot. But is it really that easy to escape the past and embrace a new beginning?

Author’s Note: In this fic the reader’s name is Yeoji

Once you’d pulled yourself together a bit you joined the boys in the cafe. Jungkook already had drinks made for everyone, and Jimin brought you your favorite coffee as you entered. His brows furrowed and his lips settled into their signature pout when he noticed your tear-stained cheeks. Once you settled into one of the loveseats he immediately snuggled up to you, trying his best to curl into your lap. Taehyung quickly joined, sitting on the floor and resting his head on your lap. To your surprise, Jungkook even joined the pile of hybrids surrounding you. He hadn’t been much for cuddles since he became a teenager. Nonetheless, he squished himself into the space on the other side of you and Jimin, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and pulling you into his chest.

The sudden warmth and comfort brought tears streaming down your face again. Jungkook gently petted your hair, sniffing at it lightly to gauge your level of distress.

“It’ll be okay, noona. Hoseokie-hyung said he’ll get better,” Taehyung’s deep voice rumbled from where his cheek rested on your leg.

Jungkook lifted his head from your hair to look at you, then at Hoseok.

“Hyung, that hybrid smells weird. What’s wrong with him?” he said. The other two boys sniffed at your clothes, catching the injured man’s scent and frowning. 

You turned to look at him. “What do you mean weird?” you asked, sniffling.

“Hybrid-y. But not? I don’t know how to describe it since you can’t smell it,” he tried to explain. “It seems familiar somehow.”

“It’s like, we can tell he’s a hybrid, the details aren’t there. Sort of? His scent is there, but it’s really light and… blurry?” Taehyung added, brow furrowed as he tried to find the right words. 

Jimin sniffed at the curve of your neck where Yoongi had been crying. He looked up at you with wide eyes.

“You didn’t say he’s a kitty like me!” he said.

“I didn’t know for sure. I didn’t really have a chance to ask,” you said, petting his hair mindlessly.

“It sounds like he’s using some kind of scent-supressing product?” Jin said. 

“Woah, aren’t those like, expensive?” Jimin asked.

“Yeah, and they’re bad for you. Since they’re marketed toward… “stray” hybrids, they aren’t regulated very well. Some of them cause really bad skin irritation,” Jin said. “I’ve seen people come into the shelter who’ve used them.”

“They can make your hair fall out too,” Jungkook said. You all looked at him, surprised. “I’ve never used them, but some hybrids that looked after me before I met you guys got ahold of some. They said it was worth it if it kept you out of the shelters.”

No one said anything to that. Jungkook didn’t mention the time before he came to live with you and Joon very often. Being alone on the streets as a child was traumatic to say the least. You grabbed his hand and twiddled his fingers.

“Well, he doesn’t need to worry about that now. He doesn’t have to hide here,” you said.

“Is he staying?” Taehyung asked hopefully. Namjoon raised his eyebrows expectantly.

“He isn’t going to be your new favorite kitty, is he?” Jimin asked, nuzzling further into your t-shirt. You laughed, smoothing over his ears with your free hand.

“Don’t worry Jimin, you’ll always be special to me. And I’ll always have room for more sweet kitties in my life.” You squished his cheeks, making him giggle. 

“Did you convince him to stay here?” Namjoon asked.

“I don’t know,” you sighed. “I barely stopped him from running out into the snow right now. He was about to go pick up a set of clothes from the alley and leave.”

“I think he trusts you,” Hoseok said. “If you’re up to it, he might be willing to stay here. I doubt he’s felt as safe as he does with you for a long time.”

“Of course, he can stay. I hope he does. I just wish I’d known sooner. He must’ve had such a hard time. He comes in every day, I can’t believe I missed this!”

“Not every day,” Jungkook corrected. You looked at him, waiting for an explanation. “He only comes in when you’re working. Did you really think a broke street performer was buying fancy coffee every day just because? You don’t need hybrid senses to know he was coming in for you.”

You felt Jimin nod, another giggle escaping his lips.

“You seriously didn’t figure it out, noona? I noticed the first time I met him.”

“All this time…” You thought back over the last year or so. “I only asked his name a couple of months ago.”

“It’s okay, noona. You see a lot of people,” Namjoon said in an attempt to make you feel better.

“Not a lot of people that come in every day, and smile at you like you made their day by remembering their order,” you said. You spiralled, thinking about how all of this could’ve been prevented if you’d just asked him anything. “All of my regulars don’t wear the same ragged clothing every day, and come in without an umbrella when it's pouring rain, or no coat when it’s going to snow, they don’t order the cheapest item on the menu like it’s a delicacy.” You leaned out of the boys’ embrace and put your head into your hands. When had you started crying again?

“It’s not your fault, noona. Nobody knew,” Tae said, attempting to pull your hands away from your face. But that statement somehow made it worse. Because he was right; no one knew, because no one had bothered to ask. He’d obviously been starving on the street and no one noticed. The quiet tears had devolved to hiccuping sobs again and Tae stood on his knees to hug you.

“I should’ve asked,” you cried into his chest. “I should’ve noticed he wasn’t okay. He hasn’t been okay the whole time I’ve known him.” Taehyung clutched you tighter, wishing he could fix this for you.

“But you know now. You helped him when no one else did. And he’s safe now. You did that. And he’s so lucky to know you,” he said. He kept mumbling comforting words until you calmed down a bit.

“I should go check on him,” you said as you stood.

“Do you want me to go with you?” Hoseok asked.

“You can check on him, but then you need to go home. It’s late and I know you work tomorrow,” you said, running a hand over your face.

“Do you want us to stay?” Joon asked. 

“No, I think I’ll just close the shop for tomorrow. One day won’t kill my profits. Then I can help him look through his things and replace what he needs.”

“I’ll bring some clothes in the morning to get him by,” Jin said. He wrapped you in a hug before leading the boys out to the car. They all gave you hugs, Jimin lingering and gracing you with comforting purrs before letting you go. 

Hoseok followed you back into the apartment, catching your wrist to stop you before you entered your bedroom.

“Hey, I didn’t want to mention this in front of the others, but be careful with him, alright?” He nodded toward Yoongi. “I don’t know how he was living before, but he’s pretty scarred up.”

Your eyes widened. “What kind of scars?”

“I can’t say for sure,” he said, pausing for a long moment before meeting your eyes. “They seem to be from some kind of assault.” He sighed heavily, suddenly looking very tired. “It would explain why he was so skittish when I was patching him up. The most recent lash marks on his back were at least a few years old.”

Your breath caught in your throat. “Lash marks? Oh god. What happened to him?”

“Look, this is really something you should hear from him. I don’t feel right sharing his private information like this.”

“Of course, you’re right. I’ll keep an eye on him.”

“Just, be gentle with him, noona. He’s been through a lot,” Hoseok said with a sad smile.

You spent an hour or so after the boys left trying to clean up some of the personal items they’d managed to salvage. The ragged clothes went into the wash, and you did your best to dry out any notebook pages that weren’t smudged beyond recognition. Your counters and dining table ended up covered with crinkled pages weighted down with whatever you could find. You rummaged around in the hall closet and pulled out a fan, setting it to blow over the mess of papers. Yoongi’s backpack sat forlorn on the floor next to the table. 

You debated whether you should pull out the contents and try to dry them out, but decided against it. The last thing you wanted was for him to feel you’d further invaded his privacy. His keyboard was already well-worn when you’d seen him playing it on the streets outside. But looking at it you doubted it would work at all now. For some reason looking at the battered instrument made your eyes water again. 

You turned away quickly and instead went to the kitchen to make another warm drink, not worried about the caffeine despite the late hour. You settled onto your couch, wrapping a fluffy blanket around your shoulders and holding the warm mug in both hands. At some point you must’ve dozed off, because a soft grunt woke you. You blinked, a bit disoriented waking up somewhere other than your bed. Early morning light was streaming through the windows. Glancing at the clock you found it was already 9am. You turned toward the sound that had woken you and found Yoongi slouched in the bedroom doorway. He glanced around nervously before meeting your eyes.

“Hey,” he said, voice scratchy from sleep and the tears of the night before.

“Hey. What are you doing up?” You rose and made your way around the couch toward him. “Are you hungry?”

“Don’t worry about it. I just figured I should start getting my stuff together,” he said, already making his way toward his bag.

“I can help you with that later. For now let's get some food in you. You shouldn’t even be on your feet yet. I’ll get your bag for you.”

You gently took his arm and guided him to the couch instead. He seemed to consider resisting, but thought better of it. His slight frame was stiff against your side, but he started to lean on you a bit after he nearly tripped on the living room rug. You settled him onto the couch and took the blanket you were wrapped in, tucking it around his shoulders. He nodded his thanks and pulled the blanket up around his head to cover his ears as well. You turned to hide your smile at the cute gesture and brought him his bag.

Once he was settled in where you could keep an eye on him you went to the kitchen to put some breakfast together.

“Are there any foods you don’t like?” you call, pulling out bread and cheese since you already knew he liked cheese toast.

“Anything is fine,” he said, ducking his head in thanks. You nodded, thinking before pulling out some sausage and eggs as well. The boy needed to get some meat on his bones. You glanced over at him on occasion watching as he pulled a laptop out of the bag and opened it. He seemed to sigh in relief—apparently it still worked. He rummaged around for another moment before looking around the room.

“Missing something? I can go look for it, whatever it is.”

He didn’t answer, instead scanning over all the surfaces in the room with wide eyes.

“My notebooks… Did you-?” He met your eyes, seemingly shocked.

“Oh, yeah. I laid out what looked salvageable to dry. Hopefully most of it is still alright. I wasn’t trying to snoop, but I couldn’t help reading some. They’re lyrics, right?”

He nodded, eyes focused on his hands fidgeting on his lap.

“They’re really good, what I saw, I mean. You’re talented. Maybe you could show me some of your music sometime? If you’d be comfortable with that.”

He winced, glancing at the keyboard on the loveseat to his left.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to play anything for you. Sorry.” The wobble in his voice made your heart clench. You put the finished meal on a tray and made your way over to sit beside him on the couch.

“We can get you a new one,” you offered weakly. He nodded, blinking rapidly. 

“It’s not a big deal. The thing was a piece of s*** anyway.” He tried to sound dismissive, and you didn’t push the matter, instead making him a plate and setting it in front of him before making your own. You glanced at him expectantly, but he wasn’t eating.

“Do you want something else? I can see what else I have if this doesn’t look good. I need to run to the store later-”

“No, it’s just- You didn’t say I could-” He stopped when your eyebrows shot up, eyes wide. His face flushed bright red as he shifted uncomfortably. “You didn’t say I’m allowed to eat.”

Your stomach flipped uncomfortably as you realized what he was implying. “Yoongi, you don’t have to get my permission to eat.” He shrank in on himself, but you didn’t let it go. Your hand came to rest gently on his arm. 

“Hey, look at me. You’re my guest, not a pet or a- a-” You cringed, not even wanting to say the alternative ways people described hybrids. You shook your head, trying to clear the anger that flared up when you thought of how poorly he must’ve been treated before you knew him. “You are a person, Yoongi. I am going to treat you like a person, because you deserve that. Okay?”

He nodded, face hidden behind the hem of the blanket still tucked over his head. The two of you ate in silence after that. You observed carefully, making sure Yoongi cleared his plate and coaxing him into seconds as well. Once you were satisfied he’d eaten enough, you stood to clear the dishes.

“Coffee?” you asked as you headed back to the kitchen to make a cup for yourself. He glanced up from his bundle of blankets with a shy smile and a nod.

“The usual?” you asked. He didn’t respond and you glanced up to find him debating something. “Why? Do you want something else? You can have whatever you want, Yoongi.”

“Can I have cream?” he asked quietly.

“Of course you can have cream! How much?”

“Whatever you think,” he answered.

“So, a lot?” you said with a grin. His small smile grew and he nodded. You returned to your spot on the couch a few minutes later with two cups of coffee. You handed him his, and his eyes widened when he saw the pile of whipped cream you’d added.

“Good?” you asked hopefully.

He gave you a gummy grin before taking a big sip. You couldn’t help but giggle, delighted by the first genuine smile you could recall seeing from him.

“It’s great,” he said smiling again as he licked the line of sweet cream off his upper lip. You laughed at the spot that still stubbornly remained on his nose. Without thinking, you reached out and swiped it away with your finger. He had a pretty adorable nose, so you’d be lying if you said the impulse to boop it hadn’t crossed your mind before. He went cross-eyed for a second as he followed the gesture. A low chuckle escaped him and you felt warmth spread through your chest at the oddly comforting sound.

“Thank you. For everything, I mean,” he said, gesturing with his mug but obviously meaning much more.

“I meant what I said last night. You can stay as long as you want. I wouldn’t mind the company.”

“I don’t want to be a burden. I’m already indebted to you, and I have no way to pay you back. And then there’s your friend’s medical supplies-”

“You mean Hobi? Don’t even try. There’s no way he’ll accept money for helping someone who needed it. I’m honestly surprised he lets the hospital pay him his salary,” you said with a laugh, trying to deflect the conversation.

“Well, I have to get these clothes back to that other guy-”

“Jin.”

“Yeah, right. Where are my clothes, by the way?” he asked, glancing at the items you’d sorted through that were scattered around the room.

“Oh, right! I have to change out the laundry,” you said. You stood to hang the clean things and put in the next load. “I washed what the guys brought in last night. Everything you were wearing except for the hoodie was ruined. Sorry.”

He visibly reddened, remembering the ordeal he’d woken to the previous night.

“Right, of course.” He paused. “Hey, did you see my hat?”

“Hat? Why? Are you cold? I can turn the radiator up. Do you want more blankets-”

“No, I just- I don’t like to show my ears,” he said quietly. You paused, setting the clean laundry aside to sit with him again.

“Why not?” you asked gently.

“It’s just- I don’t like to. People treat me differently when they know what I am. I want people to treat me like a person, you know?” he said, scratching at his ears under the blanket.

“Knowing you’re a hybrid doesn’t make me think any less of you. So please don’t feel like you have to hide anymore. At least not with me,” you said. 

He held your gaze for a moment before he apparently came to a decision. He slid the blanket back down to his shoulders. His ears were covered in soft looking black fur, though it was thin in patches near the top.

“From keeping them under a hat all the time,” he explained. “They look gross, I know,” he said. He was clearly anxious and he almost pulled the blanket back up. You stopped him though, smiling softly because he was just so dang cute. He examined your expression.

“No, they’re- You’re actually even cuter this way,” you said absently. His ears twitched and a blush crept across his cheeks again. Your eyes widened and your own cheeks grew red as you realized what you said.

“I’m sorry, was that rude? That was a weird thing to say, I’m sorry,” you backpedaled. Surely you’d made him uncomfortable now, just as he was opening up to you.

“No, no. It’s fine. That’s actually really nice of you to say.”

You gave him a gentle smile and with a nod of your head, turned back to the laundry. The morning then settled into a comfortable silence. The quiet hum of the radiator and the soft rustling of the blanketed man sitting next to you blended with the random b-movie you found on Netflix. 

━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Jin came by late that morning to drop off some clothes for Yoongi. You let him in and poured him a cup of coffee before settling at the table with your own.

“So, how’s he doing?” he asked, glancing around and noticing Yoongi’s absence. 

“Better. He got up and ate with me this morning. I put on a movie and he napped through most of the afternoon.” You looked over your shoulder toward your bedroom door. As soon as you’d told Yoongi that Jin was on his way he’d scurried off to the bathroom to take a shower. You told Jin as much.

“Yeah, he didn’t seem to care for me; or Hoseok for that matter. Seems to trust you though.”

“I guess. He still seems like he’s waiting for me to throw him out, or hurt him somehow. Earlier he-” You cut yourself off, not wanting to violate the trust that Yoongi had placed in you.

“What?” Jin prompted. “Did something happen?”

You paused, debating. Jin was probably the best person to help you help Yoongi. You sighed, deciding to ask him about what Yoongi had said.

“He was waiting for me to give him permission to eat…” you said, shifting uncomfortably. “I told him that he never has to ask something like that, that he’s a guest. But that seemed to make him even more nervous?”

You met Jin’s eyes again and found a grimace on his face.

“Just be patient. It sounds like he wasn’t very used to kindness where he was before,” he said vaguely.

“Where he was before? Do you know something? Please, I just want to know how to help him.”

“I think I know places like it.” He shuddered. “Look, if he wants to talk about it I’m sure he’ll come to you. For now just keep an eye on him. Hoseok seemed shaken after he treated his wounds last night. He’s seen lots of cases like this at the shelter… Is there something else going on with Yoongi? Something you haven’t told me?”

You pulled your knees up to your chest, tucking in your chin. You thought of what Hoseok said about the scars he saw; some from others, some probably self-inflicted. You found your eyes tearing up again, but quickly shook off the feeling.

“It’s not really my place to say. I already feel like I’m already sharing a lot of his personal information with you. I don’t want to break his trust,” you said, blinking rapidly to clear your eyes.

“I understand.” Jin nodded. He ruffled your hair. “Just promise that you’ll tell me if you need help. You or Yoongi.”

He pinned you with a stern look and held your gaze until you nodded. He smiled approvingly.

“I better get going so he can come out.”

You walked him to the door, and he turned to wrap you in a tight hug.

“I know you’ve gotta be strong for him, he needs you. But don’t forget that the boys and I, and your lil’ bro, we’re here to be strong for you,” he said. You nodded against his chest, squeezing him tightly before pulling away. Jin waved goodbye and crept down the sidewalk toward his car, stepping gingerly to avoid slipping on the ice.

You turned around and nearly jumped out of your skin when you found Yoongi peeking out of your bedroom.

“Geez, you scared me!” you exclaimed, making his ears twitch before they flattened remorsefully against his head.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay, Yoongi. I’m not upset with you,” you reassured him gently, cursing yourself for reacting harshly in the first place. You held out the bag Jin had left to him. “My friend brought you a change of clothes. Hopefully they’ll fit you better than those pajamas.”

“That’s not necessary.” He tried to wave the bag away. “I can just wear my old stuff now that it’s dry.”

“Your old stuff got pretty messed up last night, Yoongi. I have to run to the store so I was going to see if you wanted to come along. We can pick up some things for you there,” you said. He looked at you blankly for a moment before looking away. He seemed to hunch in on himself again. You took a step forward, alarmed by his sudden change in demeanor.

“Why are you doing this?” he said quietly.

“What?” you asked, not sure you heard him right.

“Look, I appreciate you patching me up, but I’m not looking for a new owner.”

You blinked, horrified that he thought that of you.

“Yoongi, I’m not trying to own you. If Jin or Hobi were having a hard time, I’d help them. I’m your friend, Yoongi. Or at least I’d like to be. I take care of my friends.”

“I won’t just mooch off of you, Yeoji-ssi. I can take care of myself,” he argued.

“Why don’t I give you a job then?” you suggested. “I have two other part-timers at the shop, but with Kookie starting uni this spring and Jimin taking more time off for dance, I could use the extra help. You can earn your keep.”

“But I can’t just have you buy me stuff,” he said, still hesitant.

“Just think of it as an advance. You can keep all the receipts if it makes you more comfortable. Then you can pay me back when you’re able to.”

He pondered your offer for a moment, scanning your face. “Are you sure you aren’t… uncomfortable? Having me here, I mean?” he asked, scuffing his sock-bundled toes on the hardwood.

“Actually, I realized this morning how nice it is to have someone around.”

His ears twitched as he considered, before agreeing with a small nod. You smiled, relieved that he wasn’t set on running off at any moment.

“Why don’t you go get changed? Then I’ll get ready and we can head to the store.” He nodded again, taking the bag from you and heading to the bathroom to get dressed.

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By the time you and Yoongi left the house it was mid-afternoon. Yoongi wasn’t thrilled with the pastel blue hoodie that Jimin had loaned him, but the clothes definitely fit him better than Jin’s had. At least the hems of his jeans weren’t dragging in the snow, and the boots were keeping him warm. Jin had also supplied a cozy puffy coat which made Yoongi look even more soft and cuddly than usual. He topped off the look with his trusty beanie, which you didn’t question.

You walked to the garage where you parked your car, humming softly as you appreciated the fresh fallen snow preserved on the tops of flower pots and inside the tiny fenced yards that lined the front of the apartment buildings on your block. You glanced into the alley, checking for cars before crossing, and images from the night before flashed before you. You pushed them away and hurried onward, grabbing Yoongi’s sleeve to tug him along with you.

The garage was relatively empty; only a few people venturing out on a cold, sleepy Sunday afternoon. The sunshine was deceptive, as the cold wind still stung your cheeks. You stuffed your hands in your coat pockets, cold despite your gloves and many layers.

When you got in the car you pulled out your phone and opened up your shopping list before handing it to Yoongi.

“Can you help me write a list on the way?”

He nodded.

“Great. Do you have a favorite food? Anything in particular you want to get?” you asked.

“Anything is fine.”

“Yoongi,” you whined, nudging him with your shoulder. “I’m serious. I’m not picky, and I hate making decisions. You’d be doing me a favor.”

He thought for a long moment before answering. “Meat.”

You stared at him blankly. “That’s it? That’s all I have to work with? Come on, give me something more specific.”

“I like steak, and bulgogi, and japchae when you add lots of beef. Samgyeopsal is good too. And the bacon we had this morning…” He continued to list dishes, and you nodded, humming appreciatively when he mentioned one of your favorites. Once he finished he had a solid list. You chuckled, looking at him fondly. You certainly wouldn’t run out of meal ideas.

The shopping center came into view, and soon enough you were headed inside. The large building contained a wide variety of stores, selling clothing, technology, furniture, and groceries, as well as several restaurants and services. Jin’s shelter was just down the road, which was part of the reason you frequented that particular mall.

“Alright, let’s pick up some essentials for you first,” you said. “Any particular store you’d like to try?”

Yoongi shook his head no, looking around curiously. A group of women walked by, laughing and chatting loudly. You stepped aside and found that Yoongi had moved closer, almost hiding behind you. You scanned his face, noting his slight frown and the ways his eyes were glued to his shoes. He glanced up to meet your eyes and you flashed him a bright smile.

“Let’s start over here.” You grabbed his sleeve and started guiding him to a shop in the opposite direction of where the women had gone. The store you entered was one of your favorites: not terribly expensive, but the quality was good, and their clothes weren’t outlandish or uncomfortable, which seemed to be in style most places. 

Yoongi wandered between the racks of clothing throwing socks and underwear in the basket without even really looking. Then he wandered into the racks off toward the tops browsing the styles.

“What would you like me to wear?” he asked you absently. You blinked, cringing at the implication.

“Whatever you want to, Yoongi. You don’t have to check with me,” you said, trying to mask your reaction. Just what kind of life had he been living? He looked up at you and nodded seriously.

“Okay, can I still ask what you think of things though?”

“Of course! Do you see anything you like?”

He took his time pulling out sweaters and long-sleeved t-shirts usually in black or white. He held each up to you in turn, asking your thoughts. You tried to read his expressions so you could be enthusiastic about the things he liked most, but he kept his face neutral, carefully observing your reactions. 

After the first couple items he picked you started to notice that while his face stayed blank, his ears were a little more expressive. They twitched forward happily when he seemed to like something, but flicked sideways and flattened when he was uncertain. You tried to hide a pleased grin at this new information, nodding enthusiastically when he held up one he liked. Once he had a modest pile of shirts and sweaters he grabbed a couple pairs of jeans.

“Do you want to try those on first?” you asked, noticing how he held them up uncertainly.

“Yeah, that might be good. I’m not sure if these will fit with my tail.” He headed toward the fitting rooms. You browsed the coats while you waited for him, pulling a couple things off the rack that you thought might suit his taste.

He reemerged with a couple pairs of jeans to add to the basket.

“Do you like any of these?” You held out the coats you’d picked. He looked at them in turn, pausing when he found one that he seemed to like.

“This one is cool,” he mumbled, his voice more of a low growl. The sound made you feel oddly warm and calm, and you couldn’t help but smile at him as he squished the puffy material. “Feels cozy.” He confirmed with an approving nod. You giggled, happy to see him enjoying himself. He graced you with an adorable smile in return.

 You made your way to the checkout, Yoongi picking up a couple of beanies on the way. He shifted anxiously on his feet behind you as the cashier rang up your purchases. You felt him peering over your shoulder as the total climbed, and when you went to swipe your card, he stopped you.

“Yeoji-ssi, this is too much. Let’s put some of this back.”

“Absolutely not,” you said, not giving him room to argue as you swiped the card. “I already saw you put back several things that I know you liked. Besides, Jin said you can keep the boots, so that’s one less expense.”

“But-” he started to protest again. “Yoongi.” You stopped him softly and took his hand. “I’m making up a rule for just today. No stressing about money for today. Please, I want to do this for you.”

He relented, grabbing the bags as you took the receipt.

“I’ll give you the receipts tomorrow, and we can talk about your wages at the shop then, okay?”

“Yeah,” he agreed. He was quiet for a moment, before he spoke again. “I’m sorry for arguing with you. I’ll listen better from now on.”

“I don’t want you to listen to me Yoongi, I just want you to let me do things for you sometimes. But please tell me if you ever feel like I’m ordering you around. That’s the last thing I want.”

“Thanks.”

You turned to him and smiled. “Thank you for trusting me.”

On the way to the grocery store you stopped to buy Yoongi a phone, since his old one was trashed.

“I’m sorry it’s nothing fancy, I just got you the same model as mine.”

“Nah, this is super nice. My old one was just something I bought off of some guys I hung around with. You can actually get games and stuff on this, and the screen isn’t cracked!” he said, holding up the phone cheerfully and giving you a blindingly sweet smile. You laughed and reached up to ruffle his hair, like you would with the other boys. He stiffened and flinched away from your hand and you recoiled, realizing what you’d done.

“Oh crap, I’m sorry Yoongi! I didn’t mean to touch you without asking,” you said quickly, holding your hands out in front of you.

“It’s alright.” He tried to reassure you, gently grabbing your hands in one of his. “It’s just a reflex. I know you aren’t gonna hit me or anything.” He glanced awkwardly away from you, but didn’t let go of your hand.

“Are you sure? You have to promise that you’ll tell me if I do anything that makes you uncomfortable.”

“I promise. I trust you, Yeoji-ssi,” he said with an almost shy smile.

“So, is this okay?” you ask, clasping his hand in yours as you walked together. “The boys like to hold hands when we go out.”

He nodded, adjusting his grip on the bags in his free hand. You continued on to the grocery store in comfortable silence, swinging your linked hands between you. 

You were forced to let go when you entered the grocery store so you could get a shopping cart. Yoongi placed his shopping bags in the cart before offering to push the cart for you. You happily accepted so you could focus on your list. The store was thankfully pretty empty since you’d come at an odd hour, so you were able to grab the items you needed quickly.

You found yourself observing Yoongi as he observed everything else. He seemed fascinated by the wide variety of foods available, asking the purpose of items here and there. You weren’t a particularly skilled cook, but you answered him the best you could. When he seemed particularly interested in an item, you casually added it to your cart, acting as if it had been on your list the whole time. If he noticed, he chose not to comment. The cart was getting rather full, and he walked a little quicker to catch up with you.

“Yeoji-ssi, do you usually buy this much? You’re not spending a lot of extra money because of me, right?” His brow furrowed, clearly concerned.

“Are you kidding? I have six boys in and out of my house all week. I can hardly keep my kitchen stocked,” you said with a laugh. Was that a bit of an exaggeration? Yes. Would you still use it as an excuse to buy Yoongi as much food as he could possibly eat? Absolutely. Your heart hurt at how skinny he was, noticeable even in his fluffy winter clothes.

Once you were satisfied with your heaping cart of provisions you headed to the checkout. As the total climbed you tried to keep a straight face and swipe your card without hesitation. The cafe was busy lately, you could manage this. Especially with an extra part timer and the festival starting tomorrow.

Yoongi walked with a spring in his step, pushing the cart toward your car. You heard a car approaching so you slowed your pace as you approached a corner. As you leaned to peek around and check, a white car whipped around the corner, cutting close to the beam you stood by and moving fast. Yoongi sprang forward, yanking you back by your coat. You fell, causing both of you to crash into the concrete wall. Yoongi grunted, glaring up at the car as it sped away. His grip on you tightened, and you pushed gently on his chest so you could get a look at his face.

“Oh my god! Yoongi, are you okay?” you asked, frantically checking him over as best you could. His arms still wrapped tightly around you, pinning you to his chest as he stared blankly after the car.

“Yoongi? Yoon, are you okay?” you asked again when you didn’t get a response. You gently put a hand on his cheek to turn him to look at you.

“Huh?” he said, his expression almost distant. He blinked, then seemed to refocus on you. “Yeah, I just thought I recognized the driver. No big deal.”

He looked around and his eyes widened. He released you darting off down the slope after the shopping cart. He caught up to it just before it slammed into the only other car on the level. You watched him as he returned. Though he kept his head down, his eyes kept darting around, searching for potential threats. He was panting, winded from the short run because of his still healing injuries. Once he reached you you slipped your arm around his, giving what you hoped was a reassuring squeeze. You smiled up at him, and he returned it, though it didn’t seem to reach his eyes. 

━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

As soon as you’d hauled the groceries back and put them away you started preparing dinner. As per Yoongi’s request you were having steak and some vegetables you roasted in the oven. Yoongi had gathered his papers, which were still scattered on every available surface, then hurried off to the bedroom to put away his clothes. He seemed touched that you’d emptied a drawer in your large dresser for him.

Left alone in the kitchen, you thought about the incident in the parking garage. Who would Yoongi have recognized? It was unlikely that the driver was another hybrid, since they couldn’t get a driver’s licence. You thought of his scars. What if it had been a former owner? One of the people who hurt him? You shuddered. Anger welled up in you as you clutched the pan handle in your fist. They could’ve recognized him. They might try to take him back. Frustrated tears welled up in your eyes. Would you be able to protect him if they did?

“Yeoji-ssi,” Yoongi called. You turned to face him, finding him delightfully cozy. You forced yourself to push aside your worries for a moment and be happy with him. He wore that gummy smile you were quickly coming to love, clearly pleased with his new clothes. He wore baggy sweatpants and a fluffy black sweater. You noted with delight that he was also sporting a pair of fuzzy white socks that you hadn’t even seen him pick up.

“You look very cozy,” you said, returning his smile.

“Don’t laugh! My feet get cold,” he pouted. Wow, this boy was trying to melt you into a puddle on the floor.

“No, I mean it!” You laughed. “My feet get cold too.”

“Actually,” he said, shuffling closer to you. “There were two pairs. If you want one, I mean.” He held out a pair of sunshine yellow socks, like his. If he’d been looking you in the eye he would’ve seen hearts shooting out of them. Every minute with him just confirmed that you would do anything to keep this boy safe.

“Thank you, Yoongi! That is so sweet of you,” you said. You ruffled his hair, then put them on right away.

“I know you technically paid for them. But I’m paying you back for everything soon, so just think of it as an advance gift,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Ah, right. Why don’t we talk more about that while we eat?” You took the dishes of food to the table. “Can you grab us silverware? It’s in that third drawer.” He quickly grabbed forks and knives and joined you. You settled in and gave him a while to enjoy the food before you started talking.

“So, you’re okay with working at the cafe?” you asked.

He nodded, mouth still full of food. You smiled, glad to see him eating happily.

“In that case, I’ll show you around tomorrow. Jungkook works tomorrow, so he can help you figure things out. He’s a rabbit hybrid.”

Yoongi seemed to tense at the mention of a new person.

“He’s like my baby brother,” you continued. “My little brother Namjoon and I took him in right around when I finished college. He was about fourteen then. He’s really shy, but I think the two of you will get along.” Talking about your little brothers reminded you of something else.

“By the way, how old are you?”

“I was born in ‘93,” he said.

“Ah, so you’re hyung to everyone but Jinnie! Feel free to boss the kids around a bit,” you joked. “And you can call me noona, if you want. No need to be so formal.”

He nodded obediently. You took in his reaction before adding.

“Unless you are more comfortable calling me by my name! Whatever you pre-”

“No, I like that. Calling you noona, I mean.”

You did your best to hide the goofy smile he brought to your face. “You want seconds?” you offered, already getting up to refill his plate.

“I’m okay.”

“Are you sure you can’t eat more?”

“I mean, not that I can’t,” he conceded.

“You need to eat more, Yoongi. You’re too thin. Remember Hoseok, the doctor that treated you? He said you need to put on some weight. Do you think you could eat a little more, please?” you asked, trying your best to hit him with some puppy-dog eyes, which you learned from Jimin, ironically.

“Okay. Not too much, okay?”

“Right! I don’t want you to get sick,” you assured him.

You filled his plate and sat with him until he ate his fill.

“I’ll get the receipts together for you in the morning. I pay my other part-timers $**.** and hour, does that sound fair?” you asked. 

His eyes went wide. “That much? Even with their owners getting a cut, that’s a lot for a hybrid,” he marvelled. 

You frowned. “Owners getting a cut? Yoongi, that’s not how it works with us. That money is theirs. They earned it. Jungkook decided he wanted to earn his spending money while he goes to school. And Jimin started paying for his own dance classes when he turned eighteen. But neither Namjoon or Jin would take their money from them.” You reached across the table to take Yoongi’s hand. “They’re family, so they take care of each other. That’s all I’m trying to do for you here. The odds are stacked against you, and you’ve been through more than anyone deserves. I just want you to know I’m in your corner, and you have a family now, if you want it.”

You finished and caught your breath. You hadn’t really planned on making a speech, but you needed him to know where he stood, and how you felt about everything. You looked at him, waiting for a response, but he just kept his eyes focused on where your hands held his on the table between you. Anxiety rose in your stomach. You’d made him uncomfortable. Now he probably wanted to leave. Why couldn’t you just keep your mouth shut? 

You loosened your grip on his hands, prepared to let go and give him some space but his fingers tightened around yours. You lowered your head a bit, trying to get a look at his face which was hidden by his bangs. You were about to say something when he finally spoke.

“Thank you, noona.” His voice trembled and he squeezed your hands tighter. After a moment he looked up, eyes shiny, and found tears already streaming down your cheeks. You met his eyes and smiled, taking a moment to gather yourself.

“Movie?” you suggested. 

He nodded happily, releasing your hands and heading to the couch. You dabbed at your face with your sleeves before joining him. He’d already grabbed a blanket and curled up, making himself impossibly small. You grabbed the remote and started flicking through netflix. There was a new original movie out which promised to be painfully cheesy.

“You up for a rom-com-cringe-fest?” you asked, looking over at Yoongi. 

His feline eyes scanned the synopsis curiously. “I haven’t seen a lot of movies, so I’m sure it’ll be interesting.”

That simple statement saddened you, reminding you of how many things had been taken from him. He must’ve sensed the shift in your mood, because his ears flattened a little in nervousness. You flashed him a smile.

“That’s one way to describe it. Let’s give it a shot!” you said, pressing play. As the opening credits rolled you glanced over at Yoongi, who was shuffling to find a comfy position. 

“Can I-” you started, then stopped yourself. He looked at you, ears perked, giving you his full attention. When you didn’t answer he made a low, rumbling ‘hm?’ sound in his throat.

“I was just thinking, when I watch movies with Jungkook and the other boys- Well, Jimin is a cat hybrid and he likes when I play with his hair and pet his ears…” you trailed off, trying to gage his reaction. He blinked. You’d caught him off guard. The brief silence made you nervous, so you quickly tried to take it back.

“Is that weird? Dammit I’m sorry I keep doing that-” You were interrupted when Yoongi’s head settled in your lap with a soft thud. He pulled the blanket over with him, tucking it around your legs as he settled. You smiled, not speaking any further as you gently ran your fingers through his dark hair, smoothing it away from his face. You scratched at the base of his ears, and quickly started hearing an unmistakable rumble. Yoongi tensed, and you could see his face grow red in the light of the TV.

“I’m sorry, I can’t help it. You can stop if you want,” he said, hiding his face in the blanket on your lap.

“Actually, it’s nice. I love purrs. You know they’re healing? Cats don’t just purr because they’re happy. They do it to comfort their sick or scared friends. At least that’s what Jimin told me. So I feel special when one of my friends purrs around me,” you assured him, continuing to pet his hair. He glanced up at you, a small smile playing on his lips as he nodded and returned his attention to the movie.

He barely made it past the ten minute mark. You quickly found yourself watching the movie alone, Yoongi’s adorable blend of purring and quiet snores making an oddly peaceful background noise. You yourself soldiered on for forty more minutes before also falling asleep.

[puckinghell]

The Plus One Pact | William Nylander | Part 5

Summary: Your ex is getting married, and you don’t have a date, which means the unavoidable “why don’t you have a boyfriend” question is about to haunt you for the rest of eternity. But then there’s Will, who could be the answer to all your problems. A simple business pact, no feelings involved: that won’t be hard for you, because you really don’t like him anyways. Except pacts were made to be broken… or something. Right?

Note: This is part 5. Click here for part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4

--

When you wake up, there’s something heavy draped across your chest, and everything around you is warm.

It takes a few minutes, for everything to get back, and until you can fully open your eyes. You didn’t bother taking off your mascara – were a little preoccupied – and you’re paying for that, now.

You don’t regret anything from last night, though.

Finally, you shift so you can look beside you. You’re laying on your back and Willy is pulled up against your side, lips resting against the naked skin of your shoulder. His arm is across your body, effectively pinning you to the mattrass, as if he subconsiously tried to stop you from leaving.

He doesn’t have to worry about that.

He looks peaceful, his blond hair spread across the pillow, his eyelashes fluttered shut against his cheekbones. The rise and fall of his chest is steady with every breath he takes.

Last night comes back in flashes; lips pressed against your collarbone, your fingers curling in his hair. Your heels kicked out in the hallway, his back bumping into the wall. Cursing, laughter. His hands all over your body, with just the right amount of pressure. The way he looked like he’d never seen anything so beautiful before. The way he’d blushed when you told him that you hadn’t, either.

The question, when it was silent and dark in the room, just the sound of catching breaths.

“Stay?”

Willy’s immediate answer, unwavering and steady. “Always.”

Your alarm clock tells you it’s past 9 am, now, but you know neither of you have anything important today, so you’re more than content to press your nose against Willy’s scalp. It smells nice; familiar. He hums in response, but you don’t think he’s awake, not really.

Then, your phone buzzes.

At first, you think about ignoring it. It’s only 9am, after all, and there’s nothing that you can think of being that important. It’s probably just Zach, asking if you got home safe.

God, you’re gonna have to tell Zach what happened. He’s gonna be so smug about it; you’ll never hear the end of it.

But then your phone buzzes again, and again, and you think about Noah’s wedding. It could be your sister again, bothering you about it, or maybe your parents. Besides, the buzzing is making Willy stir, and you really don’t want to wake him up.

He’s been looking tired, the season running him down, and you’re not taking away any sleep that he could potentially get.

You carefully unwrap Willy’s arm from around you, which earns you another not-really-awake hum, this time one that sounds a little annoyed, and manage to grab your phone from your nightstand.

The words on your screen almost seem fake, but once you read them properly, you kinda feel like the room is spinning.

3 missed calls, and a text. 

From: Noah Daniels

I’m outside your apartment, can you let me in?

What in the actual fricking heavens...

With surprising clarity, your brain immediately realizes that you have two options now. You can go let him in, and talk to literally the last person on earth you wanna talk to, or you can not let him in, and risk your entire family screaming at you.

Besides, you’re supposed to be at this guy’s wedding in two days. So maybe only one option, then.

Your heart is beating way too fast, but you very slowly start the task of getting yourself out of bed without waking Will. It’s hard, to leave him there, and the thought flashes through your mind what would happen if he woke up, but he looks pretty knocked out so you decide not to worry about that.

You’ve got enough to worry about.

You throw on the first clothes you can find and try to make as little noise as you can while getting out the bedroom. Will stirs a few times, but his breathing remains even.

You really hadn’t wanted the first time you saw your ex to be like this, looking like a drowned panda wearing old sweatpants and – is that Will’s shirt, you grabbed?

But you guess you’ve learned nothing ever goes the way you want it to, with Noah.

When you open your front door, you almost expect him not to be there. Surely he was kidding, or sent that text to the wrong phone number, or it was a dare.

But no. He’s there, standing with his hands in his pockets and a hint of a smile on his face. He looks the same as he did back then, which throws you a little.

“Hi, Y/N,” he says, his voice soft. “I hope it’s not inconvenient, I was just in the neighborhood.”

“Uhm,” you bring out. It’s really inconvenient, but for some reason, the words can’t pass your lips.

“Can I come in? I wanted to talk about something, I guess.”

Great, now your nerves are truly flying at an all time high. Wordlessly, you step aside, and he takes the invitation for what it is and moves through your living room like he owns it, sitting on the couch without being asked. He doesn’t take off his shoes. It unnerves you, which is stupid, because Will doesn’t take off his shoes, either, and that hasn’t bothered you.

“You look…” Noah starts, pauses. Then settles on: “Different.”

“So do you,” you say, which is a lie, but you don’t really know what else to say. You could offer him coffee, but you find yourself not wanting to, so you cross your arms and stay standing in the middle of the living room.

“What did you wanna talk about, Noah?”

Noah sighs. “Straight into it. You never had a lot of time for small talk.”

You’re not sure if it’s meant to sound offensive, but it does. Maybe everything he says sounds offensive to you, now.

How did you ever love this guy?

“Well, as you wish.” Noah’s hands are folded in his lap. The engagement ring is shiny on his finger. “I’m getting married in two days, and you’ll be at the wedding. So I just wanted to make sure there weren’t any problems.”

Something in your brain short circuits. “Problems?”

Noah sighs again. It reminds you of the way your mom used to sigh when you were a little kid and you wouldn’t put on your shoes fast enough.

“Obviously things didn’t end great between us…”

Yeah, because you cheated. You don’t say it.

“And your sister told me you had some reservations about coming.”

That bitch.

“So I just wanted to make sure you weren’t, like, still in love with me.” He says it as if the thought amuses him. But he doesn’t look like he’s joking, and a storm is brewing in your mind. “Cause I know our relationship meant a little more to you than to me, and for that, I do apologize. But I don’t think it would’ve ever gone anywhere, anyway, you know? What we had was more of like, a summer fling.”

It’s like there’s wind whistling in your ear, but there’s no windows open in your apartment.

“A summer fling?” you repeat, a little dumbfoundedly. “We were together for four years.”

“A very long summer?” Noah offers, and you can tell by the smirk on his face he thinks he’s truly being funny.

“You cheated on me.” It’s the first time, you think, you’ve ever said those words to him, but you can’t keep them in now.

Noah’s face falls. “Hardly,” he says. “I just knew immediately that Betty was the one for me. I had to act on that, you understand that, right? I told you right after.”

Still counts as cheating. You don’t say that, either. Instead, you say: “You begged me to take you back.”

“That’s not how I remember it.”

You want to laugh. How else could he remember that night?

He stood on your porch in the darkness and said: “Look, I know it was stupid, but I’m young, and I don’t know anything about anything. I just know I miss you. The worst thing that I ever did was what I did to you, and I just want to make it up to you.”

You said: “Go fuck yourself”, slammed the door in his face and cried yourself to sleep for the next four months.

It’s not worth it, though, and it hits you how much you’ve changed. Because there was a time when you wouldn’t have had the strength to send him away, where this would’ve made you feel something. Frustration, sadness, anger. Hope, even.

It doesn’t, now. There’s not even the dull ache of being the one that was cheated on. There’s just indifference.

It feels like closure. 

“Look, Noah,” you say, “it doesn’t really matter. There’s not gonna be any problems at your wedding, okay? I’m just there because my mom wants me to be. I’ll keep quiet.” You smile, and you’re sure it looks fake but Noah doesn’t seem to notice.

“Okay,” he says. “If you say so, I believe you.” He stands up, clearly ready to go now that his worries have been soothed, then walks to the door and you watch as his hand lands on the doorknob. At the last moment, he turns around.

“I knew you understood, back then,” he says. The smile on his face is a little too sharp and pointed to be genuine. “You’re just not really the kinda girl guys end up marrying, you know?”

You’re still staring at him with your mouth open when the front door slams behind him.

Suddenly, you hear a different voice.

“Nice guy, that.”

You turn around to find Willy leaning in the doorway to your bedroom, fully clothed now. His arms are crossed and he’s frowning.

“You invite him over?”

“What?” Now you’re frowning, too. “What the fuck, Will, of course I didn’t. He just showed up.”

An unwelcome feeling is starting to creep up your spine, tingling through your skin like the most unpleasant current.

What if Noah is right?

What if this isn’t anything special to Will, what if he’s just passing the time until something better comes along? You’ve never seen him pick up many girls but looking like that, surely he does, and you think of his cocky attitude that bothered you so much before you really knew him, think of the way he was used to everyone loving him.

What if you’re just a conquest to him, to show himself that he can still get people to love him? What if you didn’t get to know the real him, but simply walked straight into his trap?

What if none of this is real and he’s going to go run off to someone else, because you’re just not that kinda girl.

“Do you think he’s right?” you blurt out, before thinking it through.

You really should’ve thought it through.

“Do you think I’m not the kinda girl guys end up marrying?”

Will’s eyes widen, and you see his hands clench where they’re wrapped around himself. Something clicks in his jaw. 

“Are you fucking serious?” he says, and he sounds upset. And angry. Really, really angry. “You really think I would be here if I did?”

You don’t answer. No, you don’t really think that. You think Will is better than that. But something inside of you is gnawing at your conscious, because if someone had asked you that question last month, you would’ve absolutely thought that.

“You do,” Will says, and he sounds like he almost can’t believe it. “You think I’m that kinda guy, still. You said you got to know me, but you still think I would be here and have sex with you and tell you all those things I told you if I didn’t mean them.”

When he says it like that, it sounds stupid, and doubt is starting to rise in your chest.

“No, Will, I didn’t mean it like…”

“But you did.” Will pushes himself away from the doorway, stalks towards his shoes and shoves his feet in. Instantly, you start to panic.

He’s leaving.

“Will, come on…”

“No.” Willy looks up, and there’s nothing but pure hurt in his eyes. It cuts like a knife, because you put that there, and you never wanted to be the reason for his hurt. 

 “You know what the funny thing is, Y/N? I’ve never thought anything bad of you. I liked you as soon as Zach introduced us. I thought we could be friends. But you were always so… judgmental, and you always rolled your eyes at me so I figured I shouldn’t bother, and that hurt, because I liked you even when you didn’t like me. And now you’re accusing me of thinking something so awful of you, when I only ever though the best, and when all you’ve ever done is think the worst of me.” 

He’s grabbing his jacket as he talks, stalks towards the door and you know there’s nothing you can do or say to stop him, not when you’ve hurt him like this.

Willy stops at the door, like Noah did. But he’s not smiling, no sharp amusement in his eyes. Only pain. Only sorrow.

“I always liked you, and you always disliked me. For no reason at all. And now, after everything, you still don’t like me, and the worst thing is, I still like you.”

The door falls quietly into the lock behind him, nothing like the way it slammed behind Noah - everything around you shatters, anyway.

--

He’s not coming you text Zach.

Zach is currently at a restaurant with his entire family in law, but he still answers right away. He’s truly been your rock, the past few days, even if he did also tell you how stupid you’ve been.

You already knew that, though.

He promised, didn’t he? He’ll come.

He won’t, though, and you can’t even blame him for it. If you were Willy, you wouldn’t come to the wedding either.

You’re standing in front of the church. Your family already spotted you, tried to get you to come inside with them, but you couldn’t. Not when there was still the slightest chance, when you still had the tiniest sliver of hope that he would be there.

“I’m just waiting for someone,” you had said, and your sister had given you a look of pity.

You kinda wanted to bite her head off, except you really didn’t have the energy anymore.

The ceremony is about to begin. If Will doesn’t show up, like, right now, he’s not coming.

He’s not coming.

Against everything you knew, you’d still hoped.

Suddenly, you hear a familiar voice.

“Y/N?”

Your eyes widen as you swirl around, but it really is who you thought you heard, her hair curled and wearing the most beautiful sundress. “Ellie? What are you doing here?”

Ellie laughs. “Your sister invited me. Said you could use some friendly faces in the crowd.” She frowns. “Aren’t you supposed to be inside? I thought I was running really late.”

“You are.” You sigh, and suddenly you feel like you could cry. You haven’t really cried, yet, refused to cry over Will when what you had was so new and uncertain. It’s not like you got dumped, for crying out loud.

If you’re never together, you can’t get dumped. So why does it feel exactly like that, then?

“Hey, what’s going on? You don’t look so good.” Ellie looks genuinely worried and that nearly pushes you over the edge; you let yourself sit down on the steps before the church.

The street is empty. The ceremony is starting, and he isn’t here. 

Ellie takes her seat next to you and waits patiently for you to talk. You want to, you need someone to talk to who doesn’t know Willy like Zach does, who might not judge you the way you’re sure Zach had – although he’d hidden it well, being too good a friend to be angry with you. 

It’s just hard to get the words out, is all.

“Remember Will?” you ask. Ellie smiles at the memory.

“The hot guy you brought to the last wedding we were at? That spent the entire evening shooting heart eyes at you while you ignored him? Yes, I remember.”

The guy who did what now?

I’ve liked you since Zach introduced us.

Fuck.

“Yeah, well.” You sigh. “I kinda fucked that one up.”

And so you tell her everything.

You tell her about the pressure of being single while Noah got married, how much you hate your family asking you those questions with pity in their eyes. About how Will promised to be your plus one if you were his; about the pact you made, the only rule that that was all it was.

You tell her you didn’t like Will, at first, but that’s because you didn’t understand him, and maybe, selfishly, because you knew how much you would like him, if you tried to understand him, and you were too scared to get hurt.

About how that happened, anyway; he wiggled his way into your heart with witty remarks and honest eyes, shy glances and the brightest smile you’ve ever seen.

About how finally, you gave in to the desire to kiss him. About how it had been magical, until Noah showed up.

How, just momentarily, you’d doubted him, because Noah’s words rang harshly in your ears and you don’t think the scars he left fully healed, no matter how many stars Will had drawn around them.

About how he immediately crawled back into his shell.

“I don’t think it’s so easy for him to let people in,” you tell her. “And he let me in and I immediately broke his trust.”

Ellie shrugs. “You were scared and hurt and you lashed out. It wasn’t a good decision, but if he likes you as much as he says he does, it won’t be the end of everything. You’ve gotta talk to him.”

“I know.” You stare at the stone of the curb in front of you. The sun makes it look strangely bright; it’s a beautiful day for a wedding. “I was scared to do that, too.”

“Yeah, but, sometimes scary things are worth it.” Ellie is looking at you, clearly trying to find something there. “Honestly, the way you’re talking about him? It sounds like he might be worth it.”

“It doesn’t matter, now.” The look on Ellie’s face tells you you sound exactly as pathetic as you think you do. “He’s not here, so he clearly wants nothing to do with me. Zach said he’d come, you know, because he promised and apparently he never breaks a promise.” You laugh, a little humorlessly. “I can’t even blame him for that, after what I said to him. But I didn’t mean it, El.”

“I know,” Ellie says softly. “But he doesn’t know that, Y/N. I’m not the person you need to be telling that to.”  

You sigh. Maybe you should, but you can’t, not right now, and you don’t think it would really matter anyway. 

“We should go inside, probably.”

“Yeah.” Ellie helps you up and tightly wraps her arm around your waist, like a crutch for you to lean on, and starts to lead you inside. One more time, you look behind you onto the empty street.

But there’s nobody there, so you enter the church.

He’s not coming, anyway. 

[kieranfm]

𝟏𝟏𝐏𝐌  ,  𝐑𝐎𝐘𝐀𝐋𝐄  𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆  𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐌  ,  𝐁𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐍  ;  𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴  𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵  𝘣𝘦  𝘩𝘰𝘸  𝘪𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴  ››   𝐊𝐈𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐍  +  𝐄𝐕𝐀𝐍 

it  was  one  of  their  bigger  shows  of  the  tour ; 1,200  people  ,  19,589  off  of  selling  out  madison  square  garden  .  so  why  didn’t  it  feel  like  it  ?  usually  there  was  a  high  crackling  in  his  veins  ,  alighting  him  from  the  inside  out  ,  as  he  left  behind  the  screaming  of  a  crowd  that  wanted  more  .  but  kieran  had  felt  more  when  they’d  stepped  off  stage  after  playing  to  520   ,  or  even  200  ,  than  he  did  coming  off  stage  of  the  royale  tonight  .  he  couldn’t  put  his  finger  on  it  .  the  reason  WHY  it  felt  like  he  hadn’t  just  done  what  he  did  every  other  night  before  .  the  reason  WHY  the  high  wasn’t  quite  so  bright  .  the  reason  WHY  he’d  caught  the  same  look  from  mikey  ; as  he’d  wished  him  good  luck  ,  &  conan  ; as  they’d  caught  eyes  during  the  opening  notes  of  cheer  up  baby  .  the  same  look  he  knew  all  too  well ;  as  if  they  were  waiting  for  him  to  tip  over  an  edge  he  hadn’t  walked  the  line  of  in  MONTHS  .  .  .  everything  was  good  .  wasn’t  it  ?  a  smile  pushed  its  way  onto  his  lips  as  his  feet   hit  solid  ground  &  one  crowd  turned  into  another  smaller  one  ,  full  of  congratulations  for  surviving  ANOTHER  show  .  but  just  like  the  congratulations  was  like  clockwork  ,  kieran  still  found  himself  looking  for  the  one  person  that  had  been  missing  from  the  start  .  the  one  person  that  only  came  in  the  form  of  words  lit  up  on  his  screen  .  words  that  seemed  to  come  few  & far  between  —  or  at  all  more  recently  .  maybe  that  was  why  everything  felt  OFF  ;  there  had  been  no  ‘  knock  ‘em  dead  ,  baby ’  to  send  him  out  on  stage  with  &  he  couldn’t  remember  the  last  time  he’d  gone  on  without  it  .  hell  ,  he  couldn’t  even  remember  the  last  time  he’d  gone  this  long  without  a  WORD  from  her  .  but  with  ruairi’s  hands  falling  heavily  upon  his  shoulders  ,   &  an  airy  voice  that  put  him  on  edge  filled  the  air  ,  he  let  himself  be  pulled  along  in  the  tide  .  clinging  onto  the  quiet  embers  that  popped &  crackled  away  in  his  veins  as  the  high  fought  its  way  through  the  haze  of  worry  .  she  was  busy  .  that’s  all  it  was  .  

so  why  did  it  feel  like  something  was  wrong  ?

it  was  enviable  though  .  the  way  in  which  kieran  ALWAYS  found  his  way  back  to  evan  ,  because  even  when  a  whole  ocean  separated  them  he  always  found  her  way  back  to  her  .  the  only  thing  was  ,  it  seemed  as  if  evan  wasn’t  finding  her  way  back  to  him  .  because  as  the  noise  of  the  dressing  room  died  away  ,  people  going  their  seperate  ways  to  either  begin  the  pack  up  for  a  day  on  the  road  tomorrow  or  to  take  their  celebrations  elsewhere  ,   he’d  slipped  his  phone  from  the  pocket  of  his  jacket  .  the  cool  surface  settling  in  his  palm  as  the  glow  of  his  screen  reflected  back  the  same  thing  it  had  done  earlier  when  he’d  given  up  waiting  &  tucked  it  away  for  safe  keeping  ;  NOTHING  .  there  was  absolutely  nothing  . his  top  teeth  gnawed  at  his  bottom  lip  as  he  pulled  up  the  bottom  of  his  screen  in  hopes  that  it  would  reveal  anything  other  than  his  own  texts  :

         21/07/21  8:43pm          📲 i  can  only  assume  you  didn’t  pick  up  my  call  earlier  bc  you               were  too  busy  making  saint   valentine  fall  in  love  with  you          📲  but  it’s  nearly  2am  for  you  and  i   ,  personally  ,  think  it’s  rude  i                  haven’t  heard  ANYTHING  about  how  it  went  yet

         22/07/21  4:02am          📲  alright  you          📲  it’s  9am  there  and  i  woke  up  to  nothing          📲  i’m  calling  you  the  minute  i  finish  this  morning  radio  shit

         22/07/21  9:05am          📲  i’m  the  one  that’s  mean  to  be  the  gd  enigma  , evan

         22/07/21  10:00am            📲  well  ,  call  me  whenever  you’re  free  bc  i  would  like  to  know  if                   saint  valentine  swiped  our  best  photographer  from  us  

         23/07/21  3:02pm          📲  we  just  wrapped  soundcheck  for  the  day  and  we  go  on  at  9:15                 tonight          📲  so  i  can  talk  if  you’re  free

         23/07/21  3:43pm          📲  the  lads  said  they  haven’t  heard  anything  from  you  either            📲  is  everything  okay  ?          📲  has  something  happened  ?

what  the  HELL  was  going  on  ? surely  if  something  had  happened  to  her  eloise  ,  or  isla  ,  would  have  called  him  .  .  .  no  —  no  ,  she  was  busy  ; caught  up  in  editing  photos  for  saint  valentine  .  he’d  seen  how  focused  she  could  get  on  her  work  sometimes  &  with  him  not  there  to  pull  away  physically  the  time  could  EASILY  get  away  from  her  .  but  that  did  nothing  to  settle  the  cloud  that  dampened  the  glowing  embers  that  were  a  sad  excuse  from  his  post-show  high  . the  bottom  of  his  phone  tapped  against  his  palm  as  his  eyes  lifted  to  focus  upon  the  wall  above  the  wooden  clothes  rack  his  jacket  hung  on  .  it  didn’t  make  sense though  .  .  . she’d  been  shooting  for  saint  valentine  .  she  would  have  called  after  that  .  she  SHOULD  have  called  after  that  .  where  the  hell  was  she  ? “  you  okay  ?  ”  conan’s  voice  forced  his  eyes  to  refocus  ,  bringing  him  back  down  to  reality  ,  &  turn  his  attention  towards  him  .   silence  passed  between  them  for  a  split  second  as  kieran  tried  to  place  the  look  hidden  within  conan’s  features  .  they’d  been  friends  all  their  lives  .  he  wasn’t  imagining  the  smothered  worry  hidden  within  his  eyes  ,  “  what  do  you  know  ?  ” “  what  ?  ” he  lifted  his  phone  towards  conan  ,  “  evan  — ” &  there  it  was  ,  the  flicker  of  worry  break  through  the  cracks  .  it  was  all  he  needed  . “  i  asked  you  earlier  if  you’d  heard  from  her  .  ” “  i  haven’t  .  ” “  but  you  know  why  she’s  not  answering  me  ,  don’t  you  ?  ” “  guys  —  yo  ,  what  t’e  fuck’s  going on  —  ” but  kieran  ignored  ruairi  as  he  watched  conan’s  jaw  work  from  side  to side ,  “  what  the  fuck  aren’t  you  telling  me  ,  conan  ?  ”   but  it  was  mikey’s  voice  that  answered  him  & kieran’s  eyes  snapped  instantly  towards  him  ,  “  it’s  not  his  fault  ,  kid  .  i  told  him  not  to  say  anything  until  after  the  show  .  ”  kieran’s  gaze  flickered  towards  conan  for  a  moment  ,  noting  the  apologetic  look  in  his  eye  ,  before  he  looked  back  at  mikey  .  “  i  ,  we  ,  needed  you  out  there  with  a  clear  mind  .  ” “  why  wouldn’t  my  mind  be  clear  ?  ”   mikey’s  hand  lifted  to  rub  at  his  jaw  before  he  pointed  towards  the  couch  in  the  middle  of  the  room  ,   “  come  sit  down  .  i  have  something  to  show  you  .  ”

the  nausea  had  set  in  the  minute  he’d  taken  a  step  towards  the  couch  .  but the  minute  mikey  had  handed  him  the  article  brought  up  on  his  ipad   &  begun  to  explain ,  kieran  felt  SICK  .  his  fingers  curled  around  the  edges  of  the  ipad  tight  enough  to  press  harshly  into  his  flesh  .  no  —  NO  .  this  wasn’t  happening  .  it  made  NO  fucking  sense  .  Bex  &  The  Found’s  Kieran  Walsh  Confirm  Rumors  are  True  .  .  .  speculated  to  be  growing  intimately  closer  .  .  .  make  it  known  outside  of  their  inner  circle  .  he  couldn’t  stop  reading  it  .  he  couldn’t  stop  starring  at  the  photos  .  hoping  that  any  moment  one  of  them  would  yell  gotcha  or  the  article  would  simply  vanished  .  but  no  matter  how  hard  he  tried  or  how  long  he  waited  ,  nothing  changed  .  the  words  were  still  there  ,  plain  as  day  &  painting  him  as  a  liar  .  the  photos  were  still  there  ,  plain  as  day  & painting  him  as  an  ASSHOLE  .  this  couldn’t  be  happening  .   “  why  didn’t  you  tell  me  .  ”  his  voice  was  low  ,  dangerously  so  . “  we  needed  you  to  have  a  —  ” “  a  clear  fucking  head  ,  i  know  .  but  T’IS  —  ”  he  tossed  the  ipad  onto  the  table  between  them  as  dark  eyed  focused  on  mikey  ,  “  you  should  have  fucking  told  me  as  soon  as  you  found  out  .  ” “  jani  only  called  me  this  morning  .” “  it’s  been  out  for  T’REE  fucking  days  ,  mikey  .  ”  his  hands  jutted  out  towards  the  discarded  ipad  ,  “  what  t’e  FUCK  has  she  been  doing  for  t’ree  days  t’en  ?  she’s  our  fucking  pr  manager  isn’t  she  ? isn’t  it  her  job  to  look  out  for  shit  like  t’is  ? ” “  kieran  —  ”  conan’s  voice  broke  through  the  haze  &  his  fingers  curled  into  a  fist  as  he  turned  towards  him  , “  what  ?  ”   “  take  a  breath  .  ” kieran’s  gaze  darted  frantically  over  conan’s  features  .  but  as  conan  held  his  gaze  ,  the  anger  within  him  teetered  &  his  breath  hitched  in  his  chest  .  evan  had  to  know  this  was  all  bullshit  .  she  HAD  to  .  .  .  but  the  timing  of  it  all  was  too  much  to  gloss  over  .  the  photo  had  come  out  on  the  21st  &  he  hadn’t  heard  a  SINGLE  thing  from  her  since  .  she  wasn’t  just  busy  .  she  believed  it  . his  voice  cracked  as  he  spoke  ,  “  this  is  evan  .  ” “  we  know  .  ” it  was  then  he  took  a  look  around  at  the  four  that  sat  along  side  him  .  features  sharpened  by  anger  softening  as  he  dragged  in  a  deep  ,  shaky  breath  ,  “  t’is  is  all  bullshit  .  ”   but  as  ruairi’s  features  broke  from  a  second  kieran’s  brow  arched  ,  “  is  it  ?  ”   “  i’m  sorry  ?  ” “  well  —  i  just  mean  ,  DID  somet’ing  happen  between  you  two ?  ” he  froze  for  a  moment  .  processing  ruairi’s  words  &  trying  to  figure  out  if  he’d  heard  them  right  .  but  before  he  could  even  form  a  reply  ,  a  pillow  was  thrown  directly  into  ruairi’s  face  with  a  heavy  thump from  conan’s  direction  . “  what  kind  of  fucking  question  is  t’a  ,  mate  ?  ”   “  okay  ,  okay  —  stupid  question  . ”  ruairi  fumbled  with  the  pillow  down  as  he  brought  it  down  his  lap  ,  kieran  rolling  his  eyes  as  he  let  out  a  breath  &  bring  a  hand  to  rub  at  his  forehead  .  if  it  was  ANYONE  else  ,  it  would  have  be  the  last  straw  .  but  as  ruairi’s  gaze  darting  between  four  faces  that  looked  at  him  expectantly  ,  kieran  couldn’t  be  mad  as  he  explained   “  but  look  .  i  told  you  i  t’ought  she  seemed  t’  be  weaselling  in  a  lot  of  places  that  are  usually  made  for  evan  &  she  seemed  to  cling  onto  you  so  —  i  t’ought  since  no  one  seemed  to  WANT  to  ask  it  ,  i'd  ask  it .  just  t’  be  sure  . ”kieran’s  hand  dropped  to  his  lap  as  he  shook  his  head  ,  exhaling  a  breath  ,   “  i’m  not  cheating  on  evan  wit’  bex  .  ”  he  paused  for  a  moment  as  his  fingers  linked  together  ,  eyes  darting  towards  the  screen  of  mikey’s  ipad  ,  “  you  all  were  t’ere  .  we  were  taking  her  back  t’  t’e  bloody  hotel  because  she  was  DRUNK  .  ” his  gaze  were  frantic  once  more  as  they  darted  between  conan  ,  ruairi  &  ,  adam  ,  before  settling  on  mikey  ,  “  we  know  ,  kid  .  but  we’re  not  the  ones  you  need  to  be  telling  that  to  right  now  .  ”  he  was  right  .  it  had  been  THREE  days  since  this  had  dropped  &  all  he’d  said  to  evan  was  things  about  her  god  damn  saint  valentine  job  .  he’d  kept  the  whole  walking  out  of  the  interview  from  her  to  stop  her  from  freaking  out  over  rumours  of  him  being  with  bex  .  but  now  here  it  was  plastered  across  a  website  for  all  to  see  .  he  didn’t  want  to  think  what  was  going  on  in  her  head  .  “  yeah  ,  yeah  ,  you’re  right  . ”  his  hands  were  shaky  as  he  reached  for  his  phone  jean  pockets  ,  so  much  so  that  it  took  a  few  attempts  to  be  able  to  press  her  name  on  his  list  of  recent  calls  before  he  brought  it  to  her  ear  .  one  ring  ,  two  rings  ,  three  rings  ,  four  rings .  .  .  voice  message  .  he  pulled  the  phone  from  his  ear  &  hung  up  .  “  fuck  .  ” “  it’s  early  in  the  morning  t’ere  ,  right  ?  she’s  probably  asleep  .  ”  adam  ,  always  the  voice  of  reason  . “  fuck  t’at  .  she  can  wake  up  .  ”  ruairi  ,  an  idiot  but  the  most  inline  with  the  thoughts  in  his  own  mind  .  she  did  make  him  promise  to  call  no  matter  the  time  .  “  try  again  .  ”&  he  did  as  took  in  a  breath  as  he  pressed  her  contact  again  ,  lighting  his  phone  up  before  he  brought  it  to  his  ear  . &  he  tried  again &  again  &  again  .  he  tried  until  finally  ,  the  line  on  the  other  end  broke  .  he  sat  up  straighter  ,  forcing  everyone  around  him  to  tense  .  nothing  .  no  voice  message  .  he  took  the  phone  away  from  his  ear  for  a  moment  to  see  the  time  ticking  over  .   “  what’s  going  —  ”  but  kieran  waved  ruairi  away  as  he  brought  the  phone  back  to  his  ear  .  hesitating  for  one  more  second  before  he  finally  spoke  ,  “  evan  ?  ”  another  pause  ,  “  don’t  hang  up  .  please  .  ”  he  shifted  to  the  edge  of  the  couch  ,  “  i  can  explain  everyt’ing  .  ”

[nakedmossy]

Depth Over Distance - Part Ten  [Rudy x Reader]

[A/N: I am literally still laughing at the one anon comment about Rudy nutting and it making Anna being pregnant funnier. So here is the part where we learn more about THAT. And have that awesome conversation nobody wants to have and whatnot...but also shower sex, so that’s nice. Stay tuned because in the next part we get some visitors at the cabin...Peace and love, Mossy x]

You had laid on the floor for a few hours, still coming down from the adrenaline high, while Rudy played with the hair that was sprawled around your shoulders and down your back, occasionally looking down at the bandage on your forehead to make sure the cut hadn’t reopened. The fire had crackled peacefully next to you, emanating warmth and comfort, and after the wave of ecstasy had passed, you had felt a small tug in your gut, a reminder of the reality settling in around both of you at a rapid pace. Deep down somewhere you knew that the way forward from here would be complicated and grotesque, that there was no going back from this, but tonight you wanted to enjoy it.

You were sat on the couch now, Rudy’s t-shirt on, your legs stretched across his lap. He watched the fire intently, the glare of the flames licking shadows across his calm features. His blonde hair and tanned skin glowed, his jawline chiseled in perfect sharp angles, his bare chest and rippled abs effortlessly defined. You caught your breath as your eyes glided over him, struggling to reconcile the new, intimate version of him with the innocent friendly version you had known your whole life. Inevitably your mind started to drift back to the overwhelmingly satisfying sex you had just had, and you felt your legs tensing as you remembered the way Rudy’s body had melted into yours, his muscles, the arch of his back and the way his neck tipped back, the orgasm…oh my god, that orgasm.

Rudy looked over at you and caught your eyes, smiling.

“Hi” He said quietly.

“Hey” You smiled back.

“You okay?”

“Mhmmm”

“What’re you thinking about?”

You looked over at the fire and felt your eyes flicker. Everything.

“Nothing” You lied, smiling at him. “Just enjoying this.”

He smiled over at you, his face relaxed. He looked like was going to fall asleep, his eyelids were heavy and his body limp. You gently pulled your legs off of his lap and took your time standing up, Rudy’s hand on the back of your thigh to stabilize you. You moved to the cabinet under the window and pulled out the record player, placing it on counter and dusting it off. You flicked lightly through some of the vinyls and pulled out your dad’s favorite Tom Petty album, slipping it out of its sleeve and placing it gently on the tray, lifting the needle and lowering it gently to the edge of the black.

It crackled and spurred to life as you turned around and smiled at Rudy, sauntering slowly back to him and offering him your hand. His face lit up as he took it, letting you guide him to the open floor space between the couch and the fire. He lifted your hands to his shoulder and placed his other hand on your hip, you began to sway back and forth slowly as the music floated around the cabin, your bodies perfectly in sync as you danced. He slowly pulled you closer to him until your face was resting easily against his chest. The rhythmic rise and fall and the even movement of his breathing lulled you into a transient state, the concept of time loose and unfounded until he spoke and you opened your eyes again.

“Little Fern?” His voice was quiet but it resonated through his chest with a deep hum.

“Mmmm” You acknowledged, waiting. When he didn’t speak, you pulled your head away from his chest and looked up at him.

“What’s wrong?” You asked quietly.

He looked thoughtful, but he didn’t answer. You felt a flutter in your stomach, worried by the length of the silence.

“Rudy?” You waited, slowing the dance until you were both stood, holding each other, unmoving. Finally, his nose wiggled and he let out a breath, then looked at you deeply.

“What if I didn’t go back?”

Confused, your eyebrows knitted together as you waited for him to elaborate.

“I mean, what if I didn’t leave again. Didn’t go back to LA?”

You frowned now, stepping away from him and dropping your hands.

“What are you talking about?”

He lifted his shoulders slightly and looked around the cabin before looking back at you.

“I mean right now, in this moment, after the last couple days….I don’t…I don’t want to. I can’t. I can’t go back now. Not like this. Not without you, I mean…” He struggled for the right words, his face desperate.

You felt a rock settle in your stomach as you watched him clinging at words, the depth of what he was proposing swinging at you like a hard right hook to the chin. He was saying all of this as if there wasn’t a pregnant woman 8 hours away in his house. This was ruining your facade that everything in this moment was perfect.

“You can’t do that” You said quietly after a few seconds of silence. He watched you, confusion now on his own face, as your expression changed to frustration. “We just…” You looked at the blanket on the floor beside you both and motioned to it. “Can I not just enjoy this for a night before we have to face reality? Please.”

He looked at you with a small sad expression before his jaw set and his eyes softened, a smile creeping across his face. He nodded, stretching his hand back out towards you. You took it hesitantly and let him pull you back towards him, swaying to the soft music again.

“Tomorrow then” He said quietly, his mouth pressed next to your ear. You nodded silently and closed your eyes, dreading facing everything tomorrow would bring.

Despite all of that, you had gone to bed, both of you squished into the double bed on the bottom of the bunks, and laid in a peaceful, easy embrace for hours, reminiscing about simpler times and happy memories, laughing and kissing, until you both fell asleep in the early hours of the morning.

 --

 You woke up with a sore face and a small headache, smiling, as you heard Rudy banging around in the kitchen while listening to his favorite album on the record player. You wanted to get up and check your forehead bandage in the mirror, knowing it probably had shifted during the night, but as you left the bedroom you were struck by the sight of Rudy holding a frying pan, dancing slowly around the oven, his bare ass exposed and his front hardly covered by a small baking apron. A giggle erupted out of you as you slapped your hand to cover your mouth, Rudy turning around to grin widely at you, still holding the bacon pan.

“Morning, sleepy head” He said in a tired, gravelly voice. He looked like sunshine and sounded like whisky. Your eyes travelled slowly down his chest and abdomen, your breath catching in your throat, and you only briefly stared at the floral apron hanging loosely around his waist before you felt yourself blush, so you turned and kept walking to the bathroom, shaking your head.

The bandage was fine, slightly wrinkled, but your head was starting to hurt worse than any hangover you had ever experienced. You clutched either side of the sink and dropped your head between your shoulders, closing your eyes. You immediately pictured Rudy standing naked in the kitchen and felt your shoulders bounce as you laughed to yourself. You jumped when you felt a hand on your back.

“How’s your head” Rudy asked gently. You opened your eyes and blinked a few times, trying to smile at him but struggling with how puffy your eyes were.

“Pretty fucking sore” you said with a laugh, sighing. “Where are those T3’s?”

Rudy’s finger shot into the air and he whipped around, his bare ass flashing at you before he turned the corner and went to retrieve them. Arguably he had the nicest butt you had ever seen on a guy so there was nothing wrong with it.

When he returned with two pills and a glass of water, you smiled thankfully at him before taking them and sitting down on the toilet seat. You groaned at the thought of procuring the water for a hot shower, but you wanted one desperately.

Rudy walked forward and stretched his hand out, you took it and he led you into the living room, placing you at the couch before he brought a plate over to you with eggs and bacon on it. You looked down at the plate as confusion overtook you, not understanding where the extra groceries had appeared from.

“Where did this come from…I didn’t bring these?”

He shrugged, his shoulder muscles flexed. “I drove down to the store early this morning and picked them up.”

You looked at the clock hanging on the wall over the door. Just after 9am.

“That’s an hour each way. You drove an hour each way…you got up at 6am…to get ...eggs and bacon?” You blinked at him, disbelief plastered on your face. There was no way. You didn’t hear him leave or come back…you had fallen asleep deeply entangled in his arms. Not a chance.

He nodded, shrugging it off.

“I mean I got other stuff too. And called your parents.” He said the last part quieter, and with trepidation. Your fork fell down to your plate loudly as your eyes shot up at him.

“Pardon me?”

His hands came out reassuringly and he wandered back into the kitchen to grab his own plate.

“I just called them to say that you had ditched your car swerving a deer, but that we got your head looked at and we were both up here safe and we would be home in a few days. All good.”

“A few days? I’ve already been here a few days. I have to work in a few days, Rudy.”

“Relax. I took care of it.”

You pinched your face and looked around.

“What are you my fairy godfather? What makes you think I’ll agree to stay up here with you anyways.”

Rudy scoffed and smiled at his plate, scooping up a fork full of food and shoving it in.

“Because” He said through his mouthful of eggs and bacon. “I have the keys to the only working vehicle. You can’t leave until I do. And I’m not going anywhere.”

He winked at you before returning to his food. You rolled your eyes and went back to your own plate, but were smiling. You were both avoiding the upsetting truth that waited for you back home...but you didn’t mind putting it off for a while longer. Besides, the last thing you wanted was to confront Rudy’s pregnant manager who he was having a secret affair with while you had a concussion. You needed a few days. 

“I need to shower.” You said when you finished your food, not even registering how hungry you had been until that point. Rudy nodded and collected your plates, placing them on the counter. He had already filled the pots with water and was walking them over to the fire to boil.

“Working on it” He said, stabilizing them so they didn’t spill on the floor, and carefully lifting each one on the tray over the flames. His arms were just absolutely stupidly strong. You couldn’t stop staring.

When the water was boiled he carried the pots and emptied them into the tank inside the shower, sealing the lid to retain the heat. He came back into the living room to help you up off the couch, you wobbled as your head spun.

“Easy” He said, bracing your arms. Annoyed at your head but smiling, you said a quiet ‘thanks’ as you pushed past him into the bathroom. You were about to close the door when you looked back out into the living room and saw Rudy standing silently and watching you, his eyes lustfully stuck on you.

You felt your stomach flutter and the blood rush to your face, making your head pound even more. You held his eyes and waited, then bit your bottom lip as you began to pull his shirt over your head.

Again, you stood naked, watching him, waiting for him.

Again, without hesitation, he came for you.

He pulled the apron off his waist in the doorway and you bit back a giggle as he discarded it on the floor next to his shirt that you had dropped. Now you both stood in front of each other, waiting, and neither making the first move. Your eyes travelled up and down him, seeing all the things it was hard to see through the darkness and the haze of last night. He was perfectly sculpted, his muscles were taught and toned from neck to ankle, the V of his hip muscles that travelled down to his pelvis made you feel like you were going to pass out. There were no flaws, there was nothing you would change. You felt lightheaded again.

Slowly Rudy came closer until he was directly in front of you, reaching his hand up to your face, holding your chin in place as he leaned down to kiss you. You kissed him back, eagerly, and felt him walk you backwards slowly into the tiled area, his hand moving to turn on the faucet. It was shocking, the sensation of the water, and you recoiled into Rudy, laughing as your bodies began to glean the water. He ran his hands through his hair, pushing it away from his face, and clearing his eyes before smiling down at you.

As he grabbed the shampoo bottle from the shelf behind you and began to massage the liquid into your hair, careful not to let it get in your eyes, your hands travelled around his abdomen. You felt more grounded, more in tune, than you had last night. You also felt hungrier. You knew exactly what you were working with now. You closed your eyes and tipped your head back, letting the water rinse the soap from your hair, tickled by the sensation of the clumps of white foam travelling down your body.

You felt Rudy step closer to you, you could feel him against your leg, his hands moving to your shoulders, rubbing the soap suds down your chest, fondling you. You felt yourself slipping into the cloud of ecstasy, your eyes stayed closed as Rudy’s mouth worked around your neck and jawline. You didn’t have to think about what to do next, your hand slipped down his abdomen and below his waist line, you grabbed as much of him as you could fit in your hand and began to stroke back and forth. You felt Rudy crippling around you, his arm bracing you both firmly against the wall of the shower as his head dipped and he began to groan deeply. This was too easy. You opened your eyes and watched him, his face pinching tighter and tighter as he firmed and grew in your hand, and only moments later he was twitching and pulsing, his body pressing yours into the shower wall as he weakened in front of you, his head falling and resting on your shoulder.

After mere seconds he had regained himself and lifted his head to reveal a dazed but sinister smile, before lowering himself to his knees in front of you.

“What are you….oh” Your breath caught in your throat as his face disappeared between your legs. The water ran down your face as you tilted your head, your back pressed firmly to the shower wall, his tongue wreaking havoc on your ability to keep yourself upright. This wouldn’t take long.

--

After you were out of the shower and both sufficiently clean and satisfied, you walked into the kitchen wearing nothing but a towel, pouring a cup of coffee. Rudy followed you and perched himself against the counter, sipping from his cup slowly.

You looked out the window, it was a beautiful morning, no grey clouds or rain, just a light blue sky and sunlight beaming down. Even the birds were singing. It was nice while it lasted.

“Was it like this? With her?” You asked briefly before bringing your cup to your mouth and sipping it loudly. You heard Rudy choke and spit some of his back into his cup, then felt his eyes on you.

“What?” He asked, dumbfounded.

You turned around and stared at him, waiting, rolling your foot around in circles on the floor, stretching the muscles. You knew there was never going to be a good time to have this conversation, but you felt like the sooner the better. Besides, he had just eaten you out on the floor of a cold cabin shower. For some reason that gave you a confidence boost.

“Anna” You said her name, trying to keep the bitterness out of your tone. “Was it like this?”

You knew he understood your meaning. Was it like us? Was it easy like this? Was the sex this good?

Rudy stood perfectly still, his coffee cup trembling for a moment, before he placed it on the counter and ran a hand over his mouth.

“Um…” He started, his eyes wide. “Hmm.” He stared at the floor for a moment before starting again.

“Okay. I guess now is fine.” He took a deep breath and cleared his throat. You knew you had shocked him, but it felt good to return the favor. “No. Simple answer. It was not like this.”

You nodded slowly, watching him, your head starting to pulse lightly again. He moved to the table and sat down clumsily, you followed.

“Not even close.” He said honestly, his eyes meeting yours again. “She…we had a fling. Briefly. A few months ago…and then…I don’t know. It got weird. It became something…ugly and possessive. I just, I had needed a distraction and it worked for a while but when I told her to cool it off and that I needed space, she didn’t listen.”

He looked out the window now, his jaw flexing, his face pained.

“Well I mean….maybe it had something to do with the fact she is carrying your child.” You said, forcing the words out reluctantly, bitterness seeping into your voice.

Rudy’s eyes flashed back to yours and his expression changed, something flickering across his face. He leaned forward, putting his arms on the table.

“Y/N…it’s… it’s not mine.” He said gently, breathing evenly.

You felt your heart jump and your chest start to ache. You stared at him, expecting him to take it back or say he was kidding, but he didn’t.

“Pardon me?” You forced the words out, your body numb.

Rudy swallowed hard and looked at his lap, smiling and letting a short laugh out before shaking his head and setting his jaw, his hands balled into a fist on the table.

When he looked back up at your inexplicably shocked face, his expression was firm and apologetic.

“I wasn’t sure…at first. But by the time I figured it out, you were gone. I tried calling you but your phone was out of service so it wouldn’t go through. I was already coming to find you when I got your voicemail, but then…I guess it kind of slipped my mind when I found your car…and I wanted to make sure you were okay before…I feel so fucking guilty about the whole thing.”

You felt yourself sinking into your seat, your mind reeling with the words he had just said.

“How do you know?” You spoke barely above a whisper.

“I know, trust me.” You scoffed at the choice of word considering you were both in this situation because he had lied in the first place. Trust. 

“I know because…it’s not possible. I mean, we slept together once a few months ago but…we were drunk…and….i’m telling you it’s just not possible.” He was tripping over his words, forcing his explanation towards you. You looked up and met his eyes, unable to take his words at face value. You felt confined, like you needed distance from him, so you stood up and took a step back from the table, clutching your towel tight to your chest.

“So you slept together, drunk, but it’s not possible that she’s pregnant with your kid? No, sorry Rudy. I mean, I know we skipped a lot of Grade 9 Biology classes but, if you go around nutting in girls like you did last night, which by the way we’re going to have a SERIOUS discussion about later…it IS possible.” You were talking a million miles a minute and stumbling over your words, your face flushed.

Rudy stood up with his arms out in front of him, ushering you to slow down, saying your name repeatedly until you stopped talking.

“I didn’t finish.” He said firmly, staring at you Oh.

“What? I mean…” You took another step back, bringing your hand to your forehead. “…are you sure?”

“Yes I’m sure. I know what an orgasm feels like.” His eyes drifted over to the blanket in front of the fireplace.

“But…I mean you said you were drunk …how can you be sure.”

“Because I was thinking about you the whole time!” He practically shouted, trying to smile through his agitation. You closed your mouth as your eyebrows rose. He continued, frustrated. “I tried, I wanted to, it was painful not to, but…I couldn’t finish. I mean I could barely get it up with her let alone…. I had to go the bathroom to…you know...whack one out. It was brutal.”

You felt yourself breathing in but had to force yourself to breathe out. This was…a lot of information to process at 10am wearing nothing but a towel. Your eyes worked around the room, trying to focus on any one thing but unable to. Your mind started to reel. There was so much going on.

“So why is she here then?” You begged, starting to see bright spots around your peripherals.

“Because…” Rudy’s hands flew up and he sighed, defeated. “I fired her a few days before I got here, and…I don’t know…I guess this was her last ditch effort to try and get me back.”

Rudy watched you, concern clear on his face, waiting for you to calm down.

“You…you could have led with that.” You said sternly, not looking at him.

Rudy cocked an eyebrow, staring at the spot on your towel covering your very naked lady parts, and broke a small smile at you.

“I mean to be fair, we were a bit preoccupied.”

You cursed at him and spun around, throwing your hand in the air.

“That’s not fucking funny, Rudy.” You felt tears welling up in your eyes, more out of anger and the pain in your head than anything else. You wanted to feel relieved, you wanted to feel the weight lift from your chest, but you couldn’t yet.

You needed air.

You walked to the door and flung it open, stomping out onto the deck and pacing in small lines up and down the railing before leaning against it and closing your eyes. You were so dizzy.

“Seriously?” You said quietly to yourself, your mind spiraling around the thought of how just 3 days ago you had come to your absolute breaking point before realizing you needed distance from Rudy, to save yourself. That had ended in you feeling guilty about abandoning your best friend, driving inebriated from lack of food and sleep, and crashing your car in an attempt to just talk to him. You had gone through the biggest mental roller coaster of your life, and were still prepared to stand by him through this Anna bullshit, no matter how hard it was, and now he was telling you it wasn’t even his kid? Fuck that.

You heard the screen door open and felt Rudy’s presence, but he stayed at arm’s length.

“Y/N I’m sorry.” He said, his voice pleading. “I’m so sorry.”

You spun around and stared at him, your head absolutely thrashing with pain now.

“She was pretty fucking obviously pregnant, Rudy. You didn’t see that two weeks ago when you left?” You glared at him, unable to control yourself and maintain consciousness at the same time.

Rudy was breathing erratically, watching you like you were going to fall down at any moment. You might, who knows. This was a lot to think about.

“I hadn’t seen her in two months” He said calmly, his eyes firm on yours.

You sniffed, and squeezed your eyes closed, your vision starting to blur. You breathed slowly and stabilized yourself with the banister, making a deterring hissing noise at Rudy when he started towards you.

“Please come sit down.” He said softly.

“I’m fine” You said in an annoyed voice, still holding the bandage firm to your forehead. Your hand felt sticky so you pulled it away and saw blood spotted on your palm. “Shit”

“Okay no” Rudy said firmly then, walking towards you and bringing his hands up to the bandage. You swatted them away, smacking his skin and taking a step back.

“I can do it myself.” You said, pushing around him and starting to walk back towards the front door of the cabin. The sudden exertion of energy and movement had made black appear around the edges of your vision, and before you could stop yourself you were falling sideways, your brain spinning and your eyes pinching shut. You heard Rudy say your name and you felt his arms around you before you hit the ground.

_____________________________________

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[sadaboutniall]

Without Fear

masterlist | tag | wattpad

hiya! since tomorrow is thanksgiving I thought it would be better for everyone if I posted this week’s chapter today! hope you like!

Chapter Two. February 

give me moonlight, and a smile from you that I can // that I can barely believe — dancing under red skies, dermot kennedy

It comes on slow, the way waves lap up against the shore late at night, when there aren’t many boats out to disrupt them. Over and over, bit by bit, it settles in. The first wave of it bites at Lu’s ankles when her toilet overflows at 6am, leaving her standing in her socks in the bathroom, soaking wet, worrying about the water leaking into the shop below, while Ruairí meows in concern from his spot atop the sink. Frantic, Lu calls her dad, and it goes to voicemail twice before she remembers it’s 1am in New York. 

Accompanied only by a YouTube tutorial and the rising sun, Lu manages to fix the mess, shower, and start the day all on her own. Her dad calls back five hours later, and Lu feels like she’s lived a whole lifetime between then and now. 

The second wave of it has more venom. She sleeps in on a Sunday—the only day the shop is closed—stirring around 10 because Ruairí is relentless, screeching in her ear, kneading at her belly, desperate for something to eat. Mindless, she feeds him, freshens up his water, makes herself a cup of coffee, pulls out a pastry leftover from Siobhan’s bake the day before, and settles into a spot by the window of her flat, overlooking the sea, all before thinking to take a look at her phone. 

Even if she goes 12 hours without looking at her phone, Lu finds she doesn’t miss much these days—she left home on a whim, without a ton of fanfare, and knows full well that she isn’t putting in the effort she should to keep in touch with friends from home. She also knows that’s why she left.

So, most mornings, she wakes up to a few messages in the family group chat, a message or two from her best friend Georgia, and not much else. This morning, it’s different. 

208 texts. 12 missed calls. 

Lu’s stomach sinks like a stone. Her whole body heats up at once. Her hands start shaking and her heart starts hammering, all before she even manages to swipe open a single notification. 

She doesn’t even have the wherewithal to cycle through possibilities. Her brain, hitting overdrive from the start, has no question that it’s bad. 

In WhatsApp, Lu finds that her family group chat has 206 messages. She has one separate text from her dad, and a final separate text from her brother. Nothing from her mom. 

Shaking, she swipes open her dad’s first. On the counter, Ruairí is sniffing at a banana. 

Hi, love, his message says. Figured the number of messages in the group chat is overwhelming. We’re at the hospital with Sam now. All is well, the appendix is out and he’s resting. Mary’s with us, she got back from Honduras yesterday. Good timing. Give us a call when you get a chance. 

From her brother, Lu finds a selfie. He’s in a hospital bed, gown around his shoulders. He looks pale, dark circles around his eyes, but he’s okay—he’s smiling, giving the camera a thumbs up. Underneath, the message says I lived, bitch. 

Relief coursing through her, Lu lets out a shaky laugh. It’s scarily on-brand for Sam to pull out a meme at a moment like this. 

Slowly but surely, Lu’s heartbeat slows to its normal rate. As it does, she scrolls back through the messages from the night before: her brother raising the alarm that he had a pesky pain in his side, their mother, a doctor herself, urging him to get it checked out. There’s a moment where Sam says the doctor is sending him home, and another where their mom urges him to demand an ultrasound, just in case. He does, and they find the appendicitis. Lu shudders to think what would’ve happened had her mother been the one sleeping soundlessly an ocean away. 

It’s five am in New York. Lu figures they’re all shattered. Rather than call and risk waking everyone up after what was surely a late, long night, Lu shoots off a text to her dad, asking him to call her when they wake up and sending lots of love. She turns her ringer up all the way so she won’t miss anything else. She feels a million miles away. 

####

On February first, Lu wakes up in a cold sweat. It’s still dark outside, but that doesn’t mean much in a place where the sun doesn’t rise until nearly 9am. Still, Lu doesn’t even need to look at a clock to know it must be early: perched on the pillow next to her head, Ruairí is snoring gently, dead to the world, not yet ready to demand breakfast. 

Heart hammering, Lu gropes around the bed until her hand closes around her phone, cold. She squints, then sighs, as she checks the time.

4:45am. 

Lu is no stranger to waking up mid-panic attack. Sometimes, it feels like choking—like she can’t get a breath down deep enough, to pool in the bottom of her lungs. Other times, it feels like an unavoidable urge to get up, move, get as far away from the space she woke up in as physically possible. Right now, it feels like a stomach ache, period pains, itchy skin, her body trying to tell her that something, somewhere, is going terribly wrong. 

Logically, she knows it’s not. She holds her breath, five, four, three, two, one, and checks her phone as her heart jackrabbits away. Nothing out of the ordinary: her mom texted a picture of her glass of wine with dinner to the family group chat, her dad reported the score of a soccer game, her brother sent that he’d managed to run a full two miles today, his furthest since the appendectomy. Everything is fine. 

Except for Lu. 

There’s no use trying to go back to sleep; Lu knows herself better than that. Heart still working overtime despite reassurance, she slips out of bed as gently as she can, praying that she won’t wake Ruairí. She’s silent as she gets dressed and silent as she tiptoes out of her bedroom, out of the apartment, and down the stairs. The morning is still and dark, but you can hear for miles and miles on Inis Mór, and as she begins her walk the soft, familiar sounds of tractors roaring to life, cows mooing for their breakfast, sheep and goats bleating, remind Lu that she’s not the only one—that others are here too, alive, beginning their day, pushing on. Home. And underneath it all, there is, always, the sound of the waves, constant, crashing against the shore. 

####

Lu doesn’t get a chance to nap. She walks, balancing on the edge of the cliffs that overlook the Atlantic, breathing in the sea air and thinking about how the water here, crashing, violent against the cliffs below her is the same water that once lapped up on the shores of Long Island, of Coney Island, of the Rockaways, of home. Seagulls swoop, low and graceful, over her head, over the ocean, and Lu thinks that if she asked her dad to drop a floatie into the Atlantic for her it just might make it—just might wash up here, on the edge of the Earth, the way she has. 

She walks and walks—you can walk all the way around Inis Mór and back in under five hours, but she doesn’t have that kind of time. She walks along the cliffs, the white, blinding, otherworldly geology of the Burren, through the grass and the mud and the cow shit, until she’s back at the cafe, windows glowing golden against the rising sun, condensation clinging to them from the inside. Siobhan is pulling pastries out of the oven when she opens the door around 6:30, and Ruairí, curled up on the counter, looks at her, bitter. 

Siobhan smiles, “There you are. No worries, pet, I’ve fed him his breakfast.” 

She wobbles through the day, exhausted from the panic, the walk, the lack of sleep. She messes up at least two orders—gives Mrs. Duffy whole milk instead of skim, drops Mr. Kennedy’s sandwich on the floor while she’s bringing it over to him—but, as always, no one bats an eye. They touch her arm gently, lull “oh, it’s no bother, darling, we’ll make it right, now,” and the cadence of their laughter carries as she does exactly that. There’s no venom, no rush, nothing to give Lu the adrenaline she so badly needs to make it through the day. 

Somehow, she almost forgets that it’s Niall’s first day. But all of a sudden it’s twelve hours later and he’s bustling inside, bringing a rush of cold air with him. The door swings shut behind him and Lu, who had been curled up at the cushioned window seat with Ruairí on top of her in a moment of quiet, jumps. The cat’s only just forgiven her for this morning, and her movement causes him to stalk off in anger. She sighs after him.

“Oh, no,” Niall laughs a little, “sorry, did I interrupt something?” He looks soft and sweet in his dark jeans, his hat pulled low over his forehead. He’s shedding his puffer jacket to reveal a navy blue cable knit sweater and his cheeks are flushed from the cold. His eyes, bright and blue as Lu remembers them, find hers. He smiles. 

“Yeah,” Lu just about manages. “He just forgave me, you totally ruined it.”

Niall barks out a laugh, head thrown back, shoulders hunching up. “What did you do?” 

“Forgot to feed him breakfast this morning,” Lu sighs. “Siobhan did it, but he held it against me anyway.” 

“Ah, well,” Niall shrugs. “I’d be mad too, if I were a cat.” 

“S’a good thing you’re not, then,” Lu smiles. “I’m not here to feed you.” 

Niall’s still giggling. Lu wonders if he ever stops. 

“I’m thinking I might make him pupcakes or something as an apology…” Lu is rambling a bit now, but she’s so tired, and Niall’s so cute, and nothing is real here, anyway. “I know they’re for dogs but I can’t imagine they’re bad for cats? I bet he’ll like those—honestly, I bet he’ll just like knowing I slaved over a hot stove for him. It’s like he can tell, you know?” 

It wasn’t meant to be that funny, but Niall is fully cackling, crinkles by his eyes on full display, one hand clutching his tummy. “You’re funny,” he says between laughs. “A bit looney, me da would say—hey, Lu, looney, Looney Tunes. It all makes sense.” 

“Isn’t ‘looney’ offensive?” The banter with him comes so easily, Lu doesn’t let herself overthink it. “Think we’re supposed to stop using it.” 

“Ah, well,” Niall’s pulling his guitar out to tune, now, “You’re in Ireland now, love. All good nicknames are a little offensive.”

####

The night is mostly quiet, a dozen customers at the most, which Lu thinks is probably good for Niall’s nerves. He’s just as stunning as he was the night Lu first met him, pulling out an arsenal of covers ranging from Bruce Springsteen to Post Malone, somehow making them all work for his voice, for the vibe, for everyone, but he’s shaking—she can see it when he pushes his hair off his forehead, or when he drops his pick on the floor between songs, laughing awkwardly as he bends to grab it. Even with the mistakes, the dropped pick, the few stumbles over lyrics, he’s endearing, engaging, all-consuming. Lu’s meant to be working, but she can’t find it in her to look away.

From her spot at the counter, Lu watches how Niall keeps his eyes trained on the window across from him. He doesn’t seem to be looking for anyone or anything, but Lu suspects it’s easier than looking his audience in the eye—despite the fact that she can see for herself just how captivated they are. It shouldn’t take an hour and a half to drink one coffee and eat one slice of chocolate cake, but that’s how long old Mr. Kane spends in the shop anyway, eyes closed, listening to Niall play. 

For two full hours, Niall keeps the shop warm and alive. Everyone is so captivated that Lu barely has to work after all; she leans up against the counter instead, cradling the mug of hot chocolate that Siobhan made her before she left for the night, and taking him in. She barely knows him, and yet. 

Lu has seen plenty of nervous first-timers performing in front of apathetic crowds—it was practically her job, after all. She’s also seen more than her fair share of world class performers stunning crowds that want to eat them up, keep them on stage forever, bottle their energy and carry it through the rest of their lives. Working in the music industry, even just as an assistant, for five years turned her hard and jaded, made her feel like she’s seen the seedy, rough, rude underbelly of it all—but she’s never seen anyone perform like Niall before. His unadulterated, all consuming love for music is tangible, even from across the room. This is now Niall communicates. This is how he understands the world. This is how he sees life. Half of Lu feels lucky to hear it—the other half feels sick knowing that his talent is wasted here.

It almost makes her sad to have to close up at 9. Niall’s good about it—he’s designed his set to last exactly two hours, finds a climax in the middle with “Dancing in the Dark” and tapers his song choices toward a slow but steady ending, letting everyone know, without having to say it, that it’s time to head home. Lu doesn’t even have to ask him if he knows how to play “Closing Time.” 

Mr. Kane is the last to leave, sticking around a little after nine to shake Niall’s hand and tell him he had no idea how talented Maura’s son is. He talks about Maura—Lu assumes she must be Niall’s mom—while Lu slowly, quietly begins putting dishes away. She likes the routine of this already, Niall’s quiet voice, his booming laugh, his warm presence keeping her company while she settles down for the night. It’s something she could get used to. It’s something, the first thing, she thinks she could miss, if she left. 

Niall masterfully leads his conversation with Mr. Kane toward goodbyes, shaking his hand again as he shuts the door behind him. Lu looks up from where she was rinsing a cup to watch as Niall watches through the window to make sure Mr. Kane gets in his car. He waits for the car to start before turning around, leaning his back up against the door, dragging a hand through his hair, and letting out a long sigh. 

“Alright?” Lu asks, gentle. Niall’s got his eyes closed, his head back, neck exposed to her. It’s thick and littered with freckles, and his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows. In her chest, Lu’s heart does something funny. She presses her thighs together, tight. 

Niall opens his eyes halfway, exhaling a little laugh as he meets Lu’s gaze. She hopes he can’t tell—how could he? 

“Yeah,” he says then, standing all the way up and shaking his head. “That was mad.” 

“It was amazing,” Lu counters. She gently places the mug back into the sink, bracing her hands against the edge. Part of her is afraid of what she’ll do without something between him and her. “They were so into it. No one could look away from you.”

Her cheeks flush, and Niall catches it. The corner of his mouth pulls up in half a smile as he shoves his hands into his pockets. “Ya think so?” 

“I know so,” Lu presses her lips together, but it doesn’t do much to prevent her smile. “‘Dancing In The Dark’ was my favorite one; it’s perfect for your voice.” 

“Thanks, Looney Tunes,” Niall hums, making his way back over toward her. “Can I help ya clean up? I wash, you dry?”

“Oh,” Lu stills. She’d half forgotten about the dishes still left to clean, the floor to sweep, the leftovers to toss, the counters to wipe down. Her mind stumbles over the best way to go about this: it would be rude to keep him, but, God, she wants his company. She realizes, with a slight swoop in her belly, that she hasn’t felt homesick in two hours. She needs him to stay. “I actually—I have a dishwasher. I just like to rinse everything before I put it in.” 

Niall smiles. He comes around the counter to stand next to Lu at the sink, knocking his hip against hers. “Sensible,” he says. It’s quiet. Just for her. “I’ll rinse and put ‘em in. You’ve been stood here all night. What else do you have to do?” 

“Uh,” Lu feels like her whole body is vibrating. Her mind turns over itself like an engine that won’t start. “Sweep the floors, wipe down the counters, lock up.” 

“Alright,” Niall is so close that Lu can smell his aftershave. Warm, soft, mixed with sweat from his nerves and the smell of his skin. “Let’s do it.”

####

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