#I mean being a mass murderer doesn���t help

[thegamingcatmom]

BIRB MAMA LET´S GO 🐦‍⬛

(I can´t get over how adorable/goofy she looks here. How am I supposed to fear any of that?)

If Mother Miranda were to take an interest in you outside the whole vessel thing, it would include:

(Yall know the drill by now: Don´t like my dark and twisted stuff, don´t read my dark and twisted stuff. 🖤)

having to listen to her ranting and gossiping about her "children"

sometimes, it´s straight up just death threats

she´s scary when she gets like that

especially because she tends to breathe down your neck to calm herself (your scent is quite helpful)

having to listen to her feverish prayers when it comes to Eva

Eva is a big topic in general

helping her in her lab

which basically means cleaning up her mess (and she is rather messy, it has to be said)

we´re talking mountains of papers as well as mountains of bodies

ofc she´s gonna make sure to snuff out every last bit of life before she lets you near her failed experiments

she won´t take any risks when it comes to you

as for the papers-

...it´s a mess

and it´s very scary (and very unfair) when she gets all hissy and murderous over you trying to do your "job" and clean up her mess just because, out of the millions of papers, there´s one that she still needs

"How dare you throw that away?!"

"Well, how tf am I supposed to know?!"

...you think to yourself because there´s no way you´re gonna say that to her face (you quite like breathing, tyvm)

Eva

whenever she has one of her downright terrifying smash-things-against-the-wall "tantrums" (as you like to call them not to her face) she gets all purry and touchy-feely after

probs her way of apologizing (cause there ain´t no way she´s gonna use them words)

you hate that it´s working

despite being a mass murderer/mold monster smt who doesn´t require eating or using any stuff that humans usually would (like toilets), she does appreciate you cooking and cleaning for her

things she tasked you with ofc

she quite...enjoys the sight

(smt about that domestic view just...does things to her)

(you force-wearing an apron drives her wild)

Eva

preening

she does have feathers, after all

and those need lots of TLC 💋

makes you clean her mask too

or her hand chains

anything, really

in return, you may wear it

(honestly? totally worth it)

we won´t talk about the fact she´s doing it more for herself (just like pretty much everything else) because seeing you wearing what is hers just...yknow?

but also to demonstrate to you just how good it feels to be bad

"Hm... What do you think, little bird? Do you like it? I certainly do..."

Eva

forces you to attend meetings with her so she can show you off

and also because it almost always gives her a reason to rip into her "children" because that bunch just doesn´t know how to behave around you

especially the tall one who keeps throwing you looks that make it seem like she wants nothing more than for you to drop dead

you kinda share that sentiment

anywhere would be better than here

...she´s scary

something Miranda takes note of as well

one look is all that is needed to put the tall one in her place

in moments like this, you truly appreciate your roommate´s/abductor´s murderous side

when you´ve been especially good for a (long) while (no escape attempts, no talking back, no disobeying her whatsoever) she indulges your childish urges to see her transform into different animals

she will deny any and all accusations of smiling at that, down to her very last breath

(she could be persuaded though...)

Eva

one day, you´ll probs have to go from cleaning that mess to making it

which means actively helping MM with her experiments

cutting someone open etc.

there´s no way out of it, let´s be honest

it´s her livelihood, ofc she wants to share that with you

(isn´t she just precious?)

spying on the villagers for her

(she will find out when you´ve been lying, so don´t even think about it)

Eva

(This actually got way less dark and twisted than I anticipated. Gotta work on that, LMAO.)

Basically, my HC for Miranda includes her getting an absolute kick out of anything family/domestic life. She goes absolutely nuts when it comes to her daughter, so I imagine this would count for an s/o as well. She gets obsessed to the point of no return, and she´ll fight tooth and nail to keep them with her always.

I could go on, and on, and on, and on, and-

But, alas, it is rather late and, unlike some mold monster smt, I do need my sleep. ;3

I might do more posts like that cause I have thoughts. 😩🤌

CYA THERE! 🫶

[evieveevee]

What We Lost: Returning to Tumblr in 2020

On December 17th, 2018, Tumblr banned 'adult content' across the site, marking the end of an era. The ban was the result of a cavalcade of issues which reportedly made maintaining NSFW content unfeasible for Tumblr. Now, it's 2020. I'm back on Tumblr, and I can't help but meditate on what we've lost both on Tumblr, and across the globe in 2020.

Part One: Tumblr and Adult Content

*Things we lost to the flame Things we'll never see again All that we've amassed Sits before us, shattered into ash

— Bastille, "Things We Lost In The Fire"*

A bit of personal history: Tumblr was the primary community I used in various forms from 2012 onwards, associating with various fandoms, doing what I could to design interesting things. The various communities I was involved in intersected with social justice communities, and eventually I dug into those further and tried to learn to better myself in the process, starting along the path to becoming the person I did.

Part of that process was also learning to love my own body, a thing I was not particularly good at and still struggle a bit with nowadays. One of the ways I did this was by making 'adult content', or more plainly, pornography. It was a unique opportunity to experiment with femininity and sexuality - something I'd been very closed off from as part of my upbringing - in a supportive, fun environment. Experimenting with my self image first in this way, in semi-private, led to me experimenting more publicly and eventually embracing aspects of that as part of my day to day life. That's right: making pornography was part of what led me down the path to figuring out I was trans and embracing that part of me.

Making porn on Tumblr was a great time; the adult content creators and consumers community on the site was largely supportive of queer people and sexuality, different body types, all manner of things. It was - in my experience - a healthy and fun place to be, and certainly one of the better places you could be on the internet for a visual medium like pornography. Tumblr's format made it easy to share both adult content you made yourself, and stuff you were curating. Vex Ashley wrote that "this sharing was so desperately vital for women and other marginalised people whose sexualities are often overlooked or infantilised in media about sex in preference for the tastes of the traditional porn consumer – the straight white guy" in a eulogy and love letter to Tumblr's adult content communities.

Tumblr's format remains novel to my knowledge as well: the notion of having a large image-focused feed which also allows for easy sharing and curation, gorgeous, high resolution pieces and photos to be uploaded with relatively little compression, custom arrangements of photosets, and personalized theming of your blog. There was, and remains, lots of potential for expression on Tumblr., and its focus remains unique. Twitter and Mastodon's focus is on what's written, Wordpress doesn't have the sort of interlinking of blogs that Tumblr does, and Facebook is... Facebook (read: evil).

I think the novelty of that format is what made the announcement of the ban on 'adult content' so impactful. Even looking back at the framing of it is gross: the post posits that 'adult content' is something which is negative, and says that removing it is working towards a 'more positive' Tumblr. There appears to be an attempt to try and strike a balance in allowing conversation about sexuality and such, but this is the killing blow. A huge portion of the community, including countless queer and furry artists, needed to find a new home online.

3 months after the ban had hit, traffic had reportedly dropped off 20%. Recent data from SimilarWeb, the outfit which published that initial data, shows that visits to the site have dropped off a little bit more, but have stayed otherwise pretty consistent. August 2020's data shows about 317 million visits. [1] In other words: any hope that this move would allow Tumblr was dashed. A massive portion of the userbase deleted their accounts after archiving them; Tumblr and the internet at large had lost a massive, vibrant chunk of community, and it was completely in vain.

I lost contact with a bunch of those folks I was following on Tumblr for years. The mass exodus left both people who wanted to find and share artwork and adult content and the people who made it completely adrift. Years later, some artists are still picking up the pieces. Archaic policy like SESTA/FOSTA being brought into the picture has left very few standing when it comes to adult content, Twitter included. Who knows how long that will last? If something happens to change the way that Twitter handles adult content, for example, what options do casual creators like myself have?

Fortunately, platforms like OnlyFans exist. But even those are at potential risk from legislation like the EARN IT Act, not to mention the danger this poses to Twitter and to the internet at large. OnlyFans and its ilk, as they exist right now, are fantastic for sex workers because they offer pay-gating and a variety of features to make sure sex workers get paid. But they leave those of us who want to be able to curate the content they enjoy or casually create their own content freely without real options, and without real community.

We stand to lose a lot, and as always people in the margins will be the ones most impacted: the queer, the people of color, the disabled; all will suffer greatly if adult content is found without a home. Media dealing with queer themes is enough to be considered "adult content" by some and it's not hard to imagine what we could be staring down the barrel of here.

What have we lost in eliminating platforms like this?

Part Two: 2020 and the World

*These are the things The things we lost The things we lost in the fire, fire, fire.

— Bastille, "Things We Lost In The Fire"*

Meditating on what we have lost seems to be a running theme for the year 2020.

January: New Year's Day. In Aotearoa New Zealand, smoke covers the skies from a fire a literal ocean away. The Australian bush has been on fire, part of one of the most and it has turned the skies of a nation not it's own orange at midday, across thousands of kilometers. What did we lose in those fires? What stories and history? What wildlife, what species? What will remain afterwards? What will grow anew?

April: Aotearoa New Zealand hits the peak of COVID-19 related lockdown with the entire nation moved to Level 4, meaning that nothing except truly essential services, such as roadworks, pharmacies, and supermarkets were open. During that time, I thought a lot about how some of my favorite small shops were doing; the bakery with astonishingly good pies, the charming dollar store which always has a few things that catch my eye, the coffee cart near one of the local parks every morning. As a nation, Aotearoa acted early to deal with COVID-19 with a strong hand, and it was risky for all of those small shops across the country. What would we come out the other side of the lockdowns having lost, both in terms of human cost and cost to the places around us?

May: Following the murder of George Floyd at the hands of Minneapolis Police officer Derek Chauvin, massive protests against police brutality, racism, and white supremacy break out across the United States of America. Daily protests have continued to the time of writing in some cities. George Floyd is one of 781 people killed by police in 2020 at the time of writing in the United States alone [2]. 1099 people were killed by police in 2019 [3]. What incredible lives and stories have been lost in the process? Are those stories being told now? How do we prevent this from happening again? (Hint: defunding the police will be a start, and supporting the cause now is a good choice too.)

It is now September: The incompetence of the US Government has allowed COVID-19 to spread beyond control, leaving tens of thousands of deaths in its wake; lives and stories which must be remembered and their stories carried on by others. The western coast of the United States is on fire, blanketed in smoke and ashes. Massive west coast cities like San Francisco gain an apocalyptic feeling as the skies turn orange, like they did for me in January. Friends of friends lose everything in small Oregon towns. The costs of the prolonged fires will be paid by people all up the coast; it's their health outcomes which will suffer. What will we lose as a result of this in the future? What can we do to make things better?

I want to be clear: this is not a comprehensive list, and is centered around the things that me and my social circles have been aware of and talked about. Even with that consideration, we have to reckon with massive, ongoing, and far reaching concerns. The loss felt as a result of all of the above issues is staggering, and far reaching, and we must fight to ensure that loss is not in vain. Voting alone is not going to solve these concerns, and there's more to concern yourself with than any one person should have to cope with. There's not a magic bullet to solve all this stuff though.

Rather than pretend that I have one, I want to propose a couple things to close this out: one bit of advice, and one plea for yourself and others.

The advice: pick your battles carefully. Pick issues you want to focus in on, and fight for those things to make things better where you live, and in your social circles. Choose things to care deeply about first. Keep caring about them.

The plea: think carefully about the questions I've asked throughout this piece, and think about the things in your life and communities that you have lost. Think about how to make sure those losses are taken with you and learned from; to take lessons learned and better yourself and the people around you. Think about the things you don't want to lose, and how to fight like hell for them.

Move forwards to something, and some place better than where we are now. Stand united with the people around you, and press on.

*Do you understand that we will never be the same again? The future's in our hands and we will never be the same again.

— Bastille, "Things We Lost In The Fire"*

If you enjoyed this piece and want to support my work, please contribute to my Ko-fi. If you are interested in re-publishing this piece on another site, please contact me either here or via my business email.

References

[1] Data provided by SimilarWeb; accessed on 15/09/2019 at 5:30am. (https://www.similarweb.com/website/tumblr.com/)

[2] Data provided by Mapping Police Violence (https://mappingpoliceviolence.com); accessed on 15/09/2020 at 4:08am NZT

[3] Data provided by Mapping Police Violence's (https://mappingpoliceviolence.com) database, downloaded on 15/09/2020 at 4:08am NZT. Count obtained using the following formula:

=COUNTIFS($'2013-2020 Police Killings'.F:F,">=1/1/2019",$'2013-2020 Police Killings'.F:F,"<1/1/2020")

[proserpineisback]

TROS

If the only problem with TROS was the death of Ben and the rest of the movie was a masterpiece, then maybe I could forgive them. But the serious problem here is that the ENTIRE FILM is an absurdity on its own. You kinda feel like gathering all the facts across the trilogy and distribute them proportionally in each of the films so it all feels cohesive. But that couldn´t be done because Lucasfilm obviously didn´t map this project as a trilogy which it´s absolutely embarrassing. It wouldn´t have costed much for the board writers to sit for a week and write ONE STORY and divide them in three acts just like every writer does when making a book or an independent film or a short film or a documentary, Jesus there are so many people out there writing way better stuff than this with almost nothing of a budget. Having to use different directors is no excuse. The team behind the Mandalorian proves that, they obviously work as a team and so far they seem to treat the Star Wars legacy with respect taking old facts and carefully placing them where they´re needed.

Now, what pisses me off the most about this film is definitely the irrationality of Rey´s arc. The Rey who stood in front of Palpatine and told him “You want me to hate you but I won´t, not even you” is the same Rey who spent THE WHOLE MOVIE attacking Kylo over and over again out of nothing. I´ve spent this whole year wondering why they were fighting in the rain, only to find out that it was for nothing other than Rey´s sudden rage. Wondering why was Kylo flying his TIE towards her and why was she backflipping over it, only to find out it was for nothing too, were they trying to kill each other? Just after Kylo told her that he didn´t want to kill her? Did the conversations in TLJ were all for nothing and they´re back to zero? It´s like all JJ wanted was to retcon TLJ and have cool shots, which they are. The fights are very well choreographed and performed, and they´re visually beautiful and majestically scored, but that doesn´t take away the fact that plot-wise they´re absolutely pointless. When Kylo starts to talk about her past, she again attacks him in a way that for someone who believes in the good side and the Jedi and the light and repulses everything that has to do with the dark side, seems pretty infuriated and aggressive. If she was pissed off about everything the First Order did during the Allegiance comics, it would have made sense for her to mention it at least, because as it was presented it all seems pretty illogical and only for show. Again, they make her look as a person who it´s not enough informed about anything and can´t use her words to stop being one. She didn´t even think in taking advantage of Kylo´s second offering of joining him to defeat Palpatine, then if she didn´t want the throne and was so worried about Kylo becoming emperor, she just could have TALKED and tried to bring him back to the light. But that didn´t even crossed her mind, she just wanted him dead until she actually killed him and didn´t want him dead anymore just because she felt Leia dying, and I can´t believe Chris Terrio has repeated the same also pointless fight between Batman and Superman where Batman remembers his mother and suddenly decides to not kill Superman after beating him badly. I absolutely hated that movie and I was hoping he wouldn´t bring any of it into this. Saddly, I was wrong.

You can´t just link Rey to Palpatine out of nothing. You either connect her to him from the very beginning throwing hints of it or you don´t link her with anyone from the past at all. And you can´t just bring Palpatine with absolutely no excuse, it makes it obvious no one planned to have him behind it all from the start. The concept of Rey Nobody settled by Rian Johnson was a good idea so all kids around the world could relate to her, giving an important message that you don´t need to come from something important to be someone. But if the idea here was to prove that someone who comes from the dark side can choose to be light side, then DEVELOP it through the entire trilogy.

Bringing new supporting characters in the last two films has resulted in a crowded mess when everyone gets to say a line with no purpose, wasting the film´s time. When they presented Rey, Kylo, Finn and Poe as the main characters in TFA, it was understood that the story would be told through their eyes. Then why the hell bring new characters to do the job that they could do. It just makes Finn and Poe look like a pair of extras with nothing relevant to do, just being a burden to Rey when she clearly could have done everything on her own. It would have be them two going to the core worlds and convincing the people to join the cause, so they can truly be heroes in this story. Instead of having everyone joining at last minute because they think Lando is dope and decided that somehow they´re not scared anymore even now that a massive imperial fleet has appeared out of nowhere. And why having so many ships to fight the final battle when they´re gonna waste it by not showing too much of it. I mean it´s called Star Wars for a reason, but somehow they´ve wasted more time having Rey and Kylo fight than investing in the action on air. If all those fights between the two of them had place in TLJ and the talking force bonds had place in TROS, then maybe it would make a bit more sense and the story would seem to have a proportional pace in each film and a better structure. Instead, this movie seems like rushing scramble of events awkwardly mixed with all the trivia they could find from the Star Wars lore while spitting in your face absurd facts about the characters you have known for 5 years and having to believe each of them.

I wouldn´t have problems with Hux being the spy if he was suspect from the beginning. You can´t make a character to be a cold blood mass murderer and devoted to the First Order to the point of fanaticism and then turn him into a softy who reveals he is the spy and traitor of the very thing he loved, in a stupidly parodic way, and who can also be gotten rid off quite easily. And all without any character development whatsoever. I mean, fanfics make a better job with Hux as a villain.

Why create the knights of Ren if you´re gonna have them like silent dogs and get them easily killed when they´re also force users? I mean, I´m not saying that Ben is not powerful enough to finish them but apparently in the comics HE AND LUKE have fought them before and they made it out alive. It would have been a lot more interesting to have the KOR since TFA and make one of them suspect so he can be the one to bring Palpatine back to life in TROS. It would have been better to have Ben and Rey fighting them in TLJ throne room instead of the shitty praetorian guards that are killed in one second in episode III.

Why presenting new characters in Resistance Reborn if we´re not going to see them not even on the background during the resistance base scenes? It´s such a lucrative and deceitful game to have books, comics, etc. and not include them in the films in any way. I can picture them saying to the writers “Yeah, do whatever you want”.

And finally, why create such a good concept like “dyad in the force” if you´re gonna have just one of them fighting against Palpatine while the other one is in a hole. It obviously should have been them BOTH fighting Palpatine and defeating him since when they´re together they have the balance of the force. I mean, I thought that was what Star Wars was all about. It should have been all the generations of Jedi helping them BOTH since Ben Solo had already gone back to the light. Why create such a compelling complex character if they were going to make him have the exact same fate that Darth Vader had. It´s so frustrating the lack of imagination for a conclusion, it makes you cringe. The ultimate message here is that the Skywalker family was cursed and they all deserved to die.

I applaud the astonishly good performances of the actors, the realism they brought makes it all more believable and painful so we don´t forget this film actually happened. The entire movie pains me so much because I´ve grown to love Star Wars and I´ve had deep love for each of the films, yes even the prequels. I´ve defended every movie from the haters and I never thought it would come the day that I would say the saga has been completely destroyed.

[inappropriatefangirlneeds]

Gotham s5ep5 “ Pena Dura” Personal Review

“Your chance to be a part of this mission”    Warning spoilers below

HARVEY BULLOCK Wow they really put him in the spotlight. First JIM GORDON´s praise. “What you are is the best cop that I know.” If Nygma outsmarts them he wants him to take over. “I need your help, buddy.”. Then he actually listens to Bullock when he doesn´t want to be side lined. Although, I suspect that if it would have been physically possible for Jim Gordon to arrest Oswald Cobblepot he would have done it himself.  Then Harvey gets a moment with BRUCE WAYNE. Bruce is looking for Jim and Harvey is like “Sorry, kid, it's just me.” But in this episode Harvey matters and they have a moment before Bruce batdissapears on him before he can finish his sentence. “I see people losing their will to do good. People I love. What if we don't make it out of this?”  “Because the little things mater. Act by act, deed by deed, it means something. Even if no one notices or cares.” Harvey talks about paperwork (and wow did he basically address my question from last week, he indeed did, partly  .. ) but it´s paperwork that matters and keeps you sane. BRUCE WAYNE / JIM GORDON  & HOPE Haven just blew up but it seems Bruce is much more occupied with SELINA KYLE´s case. Granted there is more personal investment and that issue of him feeling guilty because Jeremiah targeted her about him but it´s an interesting notion to have Bruce to struggle with hope over a more personal matter. While Jim Gordon had his “hope struggle” moments last week over Haven and missing support from the Government. Seems that Eduardo Dorrance might bring a more personal twist to it.  ACCESSORY TO MURDER Selina Kyle & Bruce Wayne Bruce Wayne compares Selina killing Jeremiah to him killing Ra´s al Ghul but Alfred Pennyworth begs to differ: Selina and Bruce are not the same. On is murder and one is not: “Jeremiah made Selina a murderer. Just like Ra's made me a murderer.” “Ra's goaded you into stabbing him, Master Bruce. He used you as an instrument. You're no murderer.”  I´m not here to judge on that but I judge a tremendous neglect in the writing here: Does anyone remember REGINALD REGGIE PAYNE, the guy that arguably threatened Selina and Bruce, the guy where Bruce made a move to push him out of the window and Selina actually did it, claimed not to do regret it and that she would do it again. This would be such a great argument for Alfred´s point. Moreover Alfred has a personal reason to remember the death of someone he had a personal relationship with. One would think, he might bring that up. It´s not like he was ever holding back on things when it came down to discrediting Selina Kyle. Granted they had their nice moments but it seems his first unfavourable impression and judgement still holds.  Alfred Pennyworth is the first one that brings up the instrumentation of a person for murder. Which comes up with various terms again and again: Instrument/ murderous puppet/ being controlled remotely / tool / killing machine. With EDUARDO DORRANCE I think we lack a specific work but his just following orders credo makes him basically a tool for killing as well.  Edward Nygma  tries to figure out why he blew up Haven. He himself his first station then the electricity grants him a flashback that leads him to Oswald Cobblepot (“How could you? You have made me into some murderous puppet.” ) which gets him on his path to Hugo Strange.  Both SELINA KYLE & Edward Nygma have an element of control. Despite Bruce´s repeated claims that Ivy´s medicine changed Selina and she is not herself it´s unclear if or how much this is true. Also Bruce knows he didn´t want to kill Ra´s however with Selina we´ve not that much insight (with the possibility of the plant altering her) and only the modus operandi to judge.  EVERYONE KNOWS EACH OTHER SO WELL * Bruce Wayne & Selina Kyle. “You're no murderer.” “But Selina is.” “You're not the same. She did what she did with open eyes, and you got to learn to respect that, son.” “You're wrong about her, Alfred.”  It´s about the murder, but it is about so much more: “It wasn't your fault. You were just a scared kid.”  The savvy Gothamite knows: Ah Bruce is talking about himself, that´s what he feels guilty about. Selina Kyle promptly picks up the notion. “No. You were the scared kid. We are not the same, Bruce. I didn't do anything because I wasn't willing to risk my neck for someone else because I didn't care. That's who I was and that's who I am.” (Goes on to say she loves "Psycho" by Grim Streaker) I´d say still sounds like case of scared kid, and if it´s just on the basis that they were kids. * Someone do a good paralells meta for 4x12 when Bruce was the one drinking at the Sirens and Selina went in being like “That´s not you”.   * Oh there would just be a lot of quotes that deal with responsibilities and No1 but I´m lazy * Jim Gordon knows himself, that´s why he sent Harvey Bullock to go after Penguin.  * Then we have Jim Gordon acknowledging that Edward Nymga had him framed and more than on his toes. “We're going after Nygma. He's ten steps ahead. This thing goes sideways, you're gonna have to take over.” He should have known him better though or he would have noticed that suspicious arm reaching for the book.  * Edward Nygma  while struggling with what his body does still has a remarkably good grasp on who he is. For him it is clear:  “You're not a murderer, Ed. Except Kristen Kringle. And Officer Dougherty.” Well not that kind of murderer. Good except that issue where is list is like a couple names short. This is repeated when he appeals to  JIM GORDON  “You know me, Jim. The people that I have hurt, they hurt me first.” [I wonder if Ed appealing to the emotional side of things is meant to echo Jim´s “what happened to you” approach in 2x17 ] With BARBARA KEAN Edward´s focus is less on the motive and emotional part it´s about intellect and modus operandi: “Barbara! Am I dumb? In all the years of plotting and the betrayals between us, have you ever ever known me to do something as idiotically brutal as shoot a rocket into a building full of innocent people?”   All of them eventually have to believe that Edward was innocent because they know him.  * Jim Gordon & Eduardo Dorrance  So we finally get some more on Jim “a war hero” Gordon´s military background, which is great but idk I can´t quite make anything of what they gave us. “We hated each other in boot.” “Jim disapproved of my ops tempo.” “Yeah, 'cause you only had one speed: too fast.” “Took me a while to realize he wasn't afraid to get his hands dirty. Just being careful.” “Well, Jim's taught me a thing or two - about being careful.”  That HARVEY BULLOCK says that could provide some great meta if I wasn´t too lazy to properly look into the line of his old partner DIX in  DIX 1x06:   “He's a loose cannon. He thinks he's a white knight, jumping into the breach like some idiot in the movies” First it´s trust and old friendship with EDUDARDO and JIM: “I trust you know what you're doing.” “We do what we have to do, right?” But soon Jim and Eduardo are opposite forces: “After all this, you'd kill me for some bureaucrat?” “Mission comes first. You taught me that.”  This really makes me wonder what Jim did that Eduardo says this!!  Also SEASON 1 Backflash: “You know I hate this spook crap. I don't ask questions; I follow orders.” “Walker wants you to put a bullet in his brain.” “Call it proof of loyalty. It's what she needs from you before she can move forward with final relief plans.” “Jim, ours is not to reason why. And this is your chance to be a part of this mission. So please. You pull the trigger on him, or I pull the trigger on you.” * It mirrors the Jim and Harvey contrast with Harvey being the one talking about questions above his paycheck but after everything Harvey still follows Jim´s disruptive tendencies. It´s about personal responsibility, control, and in Jim and Eduardo´s case we could get some take on the "Nuremberg defense" issue.   * It mirrors the situation with Oswald Cobblepot. Once more an established order tells Jim Gordon to shoot a man, that´s not technically innocent but didn´t commit the crime in question. And once more Jim doesn´t kill but this time he doesn´t get to claim his loyalties lie with the established order.  [For a moment Jim contemplated just shooting Ed because look at what happened with Oswald, he just can´t have another relationship like that] * I wonder if we will get some flack for Jim´s decision to honour integrity over supplies? Just briefly, before it is revealed how it was actually and not only morally the right thing.  FRIENDSHIP Oswald  & Jim  Oswald Cobblepot still tries to count on Jim Gordon.  “Harvey, you're not thinking clearly. Maybe call your boss, see what he thinks.” But Jim isn´t there because he made a decision to not be there.  Oswald´s line of having had only two friends from which one he shot is sad. And I don´t know but after all the “friend” and “favour” stuff between them the “no friends” statement from Jim really hurt: “You know, they say you can judge a man by his friends.” “This from a man who has no friends.”  But at least their dynamic still works, once you get them together and disturbing forces out of the way they still run smooth for the sake of Gotham  “You're protecting a mass murderer. Don't look to me for sympathy.” “Fine. But not with that meathead around.”  Edward Nygma & Oswald Cobblpeot * “Ed, what have you done?” First of all the delivery of the line killed me! Which is not even an exaggeration. * “Of everything that you have put me through, this this is the most cruel.” This was almost as impressive and heart wrenching. * Also I´m just going to put the words down there. How, how did they sound so much like vows?! Oswald just touching his lips, putting his hands in front of them covering his mouth before he can muster so speak further. Oswald later walking right up to Edward pressing the gun into his heart. Could anyone deal with this?!  (Also what is so fundamentally wrong with me that this kind of totally is what I want, like that´s what I´d ask for in any friend or relationship, and on the one hand it´s like just a very basic just knowing and acknowledging each other but also this trust that should be as basic but just really isn´t and oh idk that was just a really special scene.) “What was I supposed to do? Let you die? After Butch, you were my only friend.”  “You shot Butch!” “Which is why I needed you! Edward Nygma, if I wanted you to suffer, I would never do it in some backhanded way.” “If you and I are ever at odds again, you will know, without a doubt, that I am your enemy. I promise you that as a friend.” And then Edward followed up with a “yes I do” and his own vows.  “I might have killed you, Oswald. And if that day comes I swear to you I will stare you in the eye as I stab you in the heart.” * Then a BETRAYAL? And then right away Oswald tells Edward to stay where he is because he´s going to be save while telling his men to get Nygma. Why did you have to break up that wonderful moment so quickly? Self preservation is a wonderful thing but not on the expense of those feelz. Quick, someone meta/fanfic this “betrayal” into something more palatable. Something like, Oswald only said that because he knew Edward would know to disappear at once, they just know each other ~that~ well, okay that´s better, a super thin argument but I´m fine.    * Oswald in this context saying “They want him, not me.” (*)  is so wrong because no honey, you are a double now a TWOFER, as Eduardo phrased it. With one raid they´d get Ed and Os. They are inseparable now.  * This is why they now both looked into the barrel of Jim´s gun while Jim gets told to kill them for loyalty reasons. * This is also why they both had the exact same approach to Jim Gordon this time. Jim Gordon is NOT GOOD CHANCES: Edward: “Once words gets out that you're responsible for Haven, you'll have a target on your back.” “I'll take my chances.” Oswald: “Even if I were to let you go, sooner or later, the Army's gonna come for you. Things are changing in Gotham.” “I'll take my chances.”  * “But first, did you name your dog after me?” How didn´t we get a reaction to EDWARD NYGMA´s question. I get it the whole mass murderer question but I´d like an answer to that one too, especially since they threw in that other JoJo dog business. Honestly I was not living that electrocution scene. (And it´s not only about the fact that Sofia and her dentist made him look much prettier.) but the  “You anthropomorphizing nincompoop. Dogs can't smile.”  sold me on it. It was worth it. Also Edward pretending he doesn´t want to be shocked again when this is going to be his escape and getting them to ignite the fuel was a good one “Please. Shoot me, stab me, anything but another jolt.” * Another marvellous line from Barbara Kean: “I am going to cut your face into a jigsaw puzzle and watch you try and put it back together again.”   * HUGO STRANGE is back and promptly sends a corpse sliding and then wipes hands. Icky. So those lined up hanging body bags had me distracted so I didn´t pay enough attention on the one that Edward Nygma would jump out of. However I think this made me suspicious enough to not trust the “I will write it down. That way, if I'm ever confronted, I can honestly say that I never told you.” Like usually I´d agree, that´s a good plan, makes sense but ha not this time. Love that they kind of paralleled this with Edward reaching for the book in front of Jim and Eduardo. Is that even a proper parallel?  * EDWARD NYGMA tries to control the script  “Let's skip the part where you deny making me into a killing machine.” He wants to get to the point. When Strange starts with a nebulous “I may have tinkered a little with your grey matter.” Edward is like: “Would you just …”  and Strange complies with an answer: “I put a chip in your brain.” “It allows you to be able to be controlled remotely.”  * I am wondering if Hugo Strange really didn´t know about the alter ego situation? It could be right? Either his situation was the reason why the chip worked (which negates my other question below) or maybe this will be the thing that makes Edward overcome his issue? Maybe the other side will surface again and they both got a common enemy: The chip and they unify over that task. THEORY?  * Also the fandom has been all about all the Eds and Nygmas and used various name variations and now the show comments on this and it´s not helpful at all? “You did something to access the Ed Nygma side of my personality.” “But you're Ed Nygma.” “I'm also the Riddler!” Is he thinking of himself as (an occasionally riddling) Edward right now?  * “I developed a tool.”  “A tool? How dare you?”   Haha, he sounded SO offended. * Quick question, why did remote controlled Edward go through the corpse tunnel, was his perception working while he was switched off and did he see Jim escape through it?  PLACES AND THINGS * Can we talk about how pretty the first place of that RPG selling guy ( Gerry Grekov) was. So pretty! Guy got peacock feathers in it.  * What was that movie he was watching? * The floor is Lava! The Edward Jim scene was gorgeous.  * As we established Jim knows Edward he just doesn´t know him well enough to pay attention to that arm that grew longer and longer to reach the right book. Like seriously Jim how could you miss this, even I was on my toes dying to know what he would do. And he boobytrapped the library. Marvellous! The chess riddle with the movements and the books. Marvellous! More please. The shots were really pretty too.  * Apart from Edward´s arm growing longer and longer we got his long legged self running over the cushions. Marvellous!

JEREMIAH VALESKA “Verisimilitude trumps precaution, you see.” “That bullet is making you sentimental.” * So the present is some resurrection. How did they reverse all the decay. Is it the same bodies. Magic, Science.  Also am I paranoid or might there be some connection to Hugo Strange´s “The last body you procured for me was gangrenous. Completely unsuitable.” line. Unsuitable doesn´t mean unusable. * Jeremiah knew Mr. Wayne, didn´t he. I´m too lazy to look things up but there was a connection. Is he also doing this for himself. Family reunion cause he never had a (good) one?  * Sorry but EDUARDO DORRANCE is boring, get on the program Gotham doesn´t do boring. Clearly Eduardo Flamingo was the superior Eduardo. * “I'm gonna wring this nerd's neck.” Careful Eduardo, this other nerd is just in the progress of saving your life.  * “You left the Army for this city?” You know, I keep saying that people would probably better be off just getting the hell out of there but the reaction to this line showed me I´m as stupid. I mean not that it´s something new all the bathtubs alone had sold me. And army, army instead of riddles like that and freedom to wear leather, pink hair, how´s that even considered competition. * THERESA WALKER why did she need Edward Nygma? If they had a public trial, execution then yes but Eduardo didn´t seem to be concerned about getting him alive, they could have just sent in some random guy? They got all those military people in now I´m sure they could have done less before and it´s probably less effort than commissioning a human drone? * “We need shock and awe.” “Shock and awe is my default.” I wonder if this was foreshadowing because after all the Haven thing could fall under that strategy. They only sent in military after this devastating and shocking destruction. OSWALD COBBLEPOT BEING HIMSELF AGAIN? “Edward, I believe the time has come for a change of scenery.” What is Oswald Cobblepot up to?! What did he store down there, what are his plans? He didn´t seem to be too worried about the military. He must have some kind of plan? Also the “Please. An invasion is tanks, infantry. These are scouts.” line gives me hope that he is prepared.  (*) On the other hand him thinking the military would not go after him too, only Edward, while he was “on top of” the list seems to point into a different direction.  Also someone any (head)canons on Oswald Cobblepot and knowledge about military, has he been ever connected to military terms? He´s been in Jim Gordon´s soldier vision/dream thingie, I don´t know why this line stuck so much with me, but the dismissive patronizing smug deliver was marvellous.

[jmrphy]

Meta reflections on Jesse Pinkman’s new book, Enlightenment Now, with a special focus on the Joe Rogan chapter

Warning: This was supposed to be a really quick thing about the reception of Steven Pinker's new book, in part just to rev this blog back up as an easier-going place for short, fun stuff. Accidentally it became a 4k-word world-historical meta-narrative about the changing political coordinates of contemporary intellectual life on a razor-thin evidentiary base.

I just read RS Bakker's thoughts on the new Pinker book. I thought they were very stimulating and seemed important/credible—although I didn't grok everything in my one time through on the train. They did, however, motivate me to jot down a few thoughts that have been recurring to me lately. They're not really related to Bakker's post.

I'm not going to comment on the Pinker book, first because I haven't read it; second, because I don't like playing in already overpopulated peanut galleries, it pains my frail ego; third, because, as with many things today, it seems to me the real theoretical points of interest are at a meta level. There's a time and place to use proper names, no doubt, but individuals and their particular products are often red herrings, I think. If I use the name Pinker below it's just for shorthand; this will really be about the larger class of prestigious public intellectuals of which he is only one example (as opposed to, say, the high-brow but unpaid batshit blogger class, the personal-brand-with-a-patreon class, the Youtube philosophy for dummies educator class, the Alex Jones balls-to-the-wall flight from Earth class, etc.). It turns out there are wayyy more ways to be a famous and influential intellectual than anyone could have known when they were in grad school in the 70s or 80s, or even the 90s really.

In fact, I won't even use Pinker's name, to emphasize that I'm really not out here trying to ankle-bite this great and good scientist who is much smarter and more accomplished than myself. Wherever I might want to refer to Pinker as an example, I will instead refer to Pinkman. That way you'll think of Jesse from Breaking Bad, in the form of a prestigious social scientist instead of a meth kingpin.

Highly successful and publicly influential academic intellectuals are playing a very particular kind of game. The logic of this game made sense even ten years ago, but I'm not sure it does anymore. The logic is something like this "Get really smart, make real scientific contributions, earn legitimate credentials and status, then leverage this elevated status to shape the body politic toward the Good (and also be handsomely remunerated, admired, etc. — but hey, fair enough.) I've never met Pinkman or many other famous scientists but my sense is they have given much of their life to some version of this noble vocation. This is an archetypal Liberal identity-mold, a tried and true, recognizable Calling, in a world where such things are increasingly hard to find.

Well, the past decade has thrown up some data points that really make you wonder whether the basic terms of this model still obtain. A few things lately have given me the bad feeling that someone like Pinkman may have invested most of their life in a certain kind of bargain with Liberal Society that, sadly, Liberal Society has now reneged on. I say this is a bad feeling because, if true, it's very unfortunate and I genuinely feel for them.

So what's this bargain I speak of, in a little more detail? First, for background, remember that for much of our history highly talented and creative individuals are typically punished by their groups. Reverse dominance hierarchies, etc., you can't let super talented people get too ahead of the others because then they'll dominate, or group morale suffers, or the group disintegrates, or whatever. Bad things will happen. So they'd cut you down to size at every opportunity. But liberal society was willing to offer super smart and able people a bargain: If you're really smart and able, then you can go off and cultivate your smarts but only on condition that you respect Liberal Society. It's a pretty genius solution actually: let the ablest flourish above everyone else but make them pay a cut of their gains to the cohesion of the whole. Win-win. The society got all the benefits of crazy geniuses solving problems, without them dominating or collective cohesion suffering. The geniuses not only got to enjoy their objective superiority on full blast, they also got to feel like it was all about doing good for others. And maybe it is.

It is the right to generously bestow social improvement that is one of the great joys of being a prestigious intellectual--could you imagine how exhilarating it must feel to have earned, through a life of study, the exalted role of institutionally sanctioned Society Improver at grand scale, how genuinely good it must feel to know that all of your sacrifice and hard work now empowers you to improve the knowledge and character of millions, and the political health of a whole society? Understood a little more rational-choicely, this is one of the key income streams that liberal society pays to its most prestigious geniuses, in return for their lifelong loyalty to all of the official tenets of harmonious Liberal Society. I think the data is pretty obvious in showing that no matter how genius you might be, if you go off the rails of "reasonable discourse" beyond a certain degree you quickly lose all of your standing and influence (on this model, anyway.

(Note that the newer classes of public intellectuals have figured out that if you decline the liberal institutional bargain, then going maximally off the rails can be its own direct path to extraordinary intellectual influence and economic reward. But more on that later, let's stay on track understanding the fine print of the liberal intellectual's bargain with liberal society).

Here's where things get a little shadowy because the harmony of Liberal Society is quite sensitive. It's kind of like a precious baby, and we love babies and would do anything to protect them, but this is how hypocrisy enters in automatically, because Liberal Society requires everyone to presume everyone else is an adult, and to treat everyone as such. For instance, when two groups violently disagree over certain deep moral questions, well, liberal society doesn't allow them to deal with it violently (a good thing perhaps, as Pinkman has amply documented). But what does it do instead?

The simplest way to summarize all of the things that Liberal Society does to reduce violence: It papers over the conflicts, which is maybe a brilliant solution, or maybe an insane, explosive solution that simply hasn't exploded yet — the jury is still out on that one. If Group A thinks abortion is murdering babies, and Group B thinks prohibition of abortion is enslaving women, the only way to deal with such profound and high-stakes ethical disagreement, other than civil war, is to derive some symbolic artifice(s) that will let both groups live peacefully with the other. Hmm, thinks Caesar, do we have anyone around here good at generating clever symbolic artifices? In swoops the knighted genius. The genius is delighted to take a break from self-cultivation in order to contribute to Harmony, and Caesar, as well as the common people, are happy to have someone on hand to explain why I don't have to worry if my neighbor is Evil. Win, win, win.

Thus baked into the vocation of the modern liberal intellectual is, from the get-go, a highly dissimulated condescension and hypocrisy. The liberal intellectual gets their status precisely from a superior ability (earned or inherited, doesn't matter) but they are contractually obligated to treat the normal masses as equals, when they know damn well that in fact, the normal masses are dumber, more dangerous, and in need of Harmonizing by institutions (paper). Also, remember that the genius wants to help, it's extremely rewarding to sincerely help society, but the noble sacrifice the genius admirably contributes to the social good is precisely the papering over, of whatever the normal masses need papered over for their well-being. This is how a basic minimum of dissimulation, condescension, and hypocrisy is structurally embedded in the vocation or calling of the modern liberal intellectual. We might note in passing it's also an avatar of Plato's Philosopher-King, a conceptual-political thought-rut that many progressive intellectual personae tend to inhabit in one way or another (and yes, here, Pinkman is a Progressive, despite some infamy among SJWs).

OK, so the modern liberal intellectual might be forced to pay lip service to a few small Noble Lies, but it's soooo much better than all that homicide and war in the earlier chapters of Pinkman's violence book, that it seems like a no-brainer. "There are political realities, it's not my fault, all I can do is speak the truth in a way that helps society the most. If that means I have to use my words judiciously, is that really so bad?" an elite cognitive scientist might reasonably ask. The only problem is that this entire model presumes that the speech of the prestige intellectual will remain highly weighted relative to the speech of anyone else who might take it upon themselves to explain things publicly.

What if external circumstances change in such a way that the masses start to intuit that the knighted geniuses have quietly been playing a political game all along? What if, empirically, things just so happen to play out in such a way that a critical mass of pretty average people (on the right and the left, and in their own languages and for their own reasons), quietly update their mental and behavioral models of the world in the realization that: "Eureka! I have a strong suspicion that some really serious issues have been papered over for some time now... and I'm not going to be a dupe any longer. I see what's going on, and I can play this game, too..." Well, one thing to note is that if this updating were to occur, even on a massive and rapid scale, there's no reason to believe we would know it anytime soon after it occurred. The next thing to see is that, suddenly, the entire bargain that the prestige intellectual based his whole life's labors on would suddenly be off the table.

So long as your pronouncements are weighted well by institutionalized attention monopolies, your lifelong service to science mixed slightly with Harmony-producing fluff was a reasonable and even maybe noble project. If your prestige loses its weight, then tempering your extreme intelligence with little white lies would be all for nought, because you're about to be left in the dust by new startups who specialize in unreasonably extreme truth-telling ("red pills" and many other colored pills now available) and also unreasonably extreme hypocrisy (self-help bullshit, SJWism, etc.). You'll still have your niche, but your effect on people and society will rapidly fall towards zero (along with the overwhelming majority of other people, including most smart people).

It seems to me that as a sociological phenomenon, Pinkman's recent book dramatizes a lot of what I'm modeling here. I think the world has changed a lot very recently and with many things we're like the roadrunner who's already off the cliff, but we haven't yet looked down to see the vast empty space beneath our galloping gait. In a strange way, I think dumber people have been doing more correct updating as of late, and some of the smartest people have been stubbornly failing to update lately. Dumber people have updated to not listen to a word of what the mainstream intellectual culture says, but smart people have not yet been able to update in response to this updating by dumber people (in part because smart people don't have any way of hearing about how dumber people are updating, and they're not exactly accustomed to caring about it). The inertia of media representations enforces a substantial lag between increasingly rapid techno-economic changes in the distribution of powers and our meager human mental models of where that power is.

All of this has been quite abstract, and I mentioned above that I have some data points, so I'll just end with those. I might have tricked you, accidentally, because to be honest, I've extrapolated this whole bonkers historical meta-narrative from a few very measly anecdotal observations. Well first, I kind of had in mind things like Trump and Brexit, i.e. signals of widespread mistrust of dominant institutions and respectable liberal wisdom. So those are pretty big and real data points for the kind of perspective I'm articulating here. I also have a few more specific ones, although they are very tendentious.

The first one is so silly, you're really going to laugh at me for writing this long post in part because of this ridiculously tiny and personal anecdote. You can write your own blog, I for one sense significant causal evidence in this little story. Basically, I listened to the Joe Rogan podcast with Pinkman about his new book and... Pinkman was fine, he's a brilliant and likable guy... but... something was wrong. Very wrong. Don't tell anyone because it's kind of orthogonal to my personal brand and I have to stay on point, but I've listened to many, many Joe Rogan podcasts. And I'm a professional social scientist mind you, so if anything the Pinkman podcast should be more interesting and effective on me, relative to the average episode. But it was just so... "boring" is not even the word. Flat? Anachronistic? Bloodless? Zombieish? None of these quite convey it, but together they give some sense. The point is that, as a minor young academic but a relative connoisseur of the new media, for me something really significant in the machinery of intellectual experience was failing to fire, so much so that it was quite strange. I was surprised and confused. But now I think I understand it; it's everything I've said above.

The world that Pinkman seems to think he is in, is not the world we're actually living in now. The book will be successful economically of course, but it has no affective-identity constituency, other than people who are already socio-culturally neutralized or priced-in by the current equilibrium. It's hard to see how anything will move or shake from this type of project anymore. Most intellectual figures preach to a choir, of course, so Pinkman is no better or worse for that — but some choirs move and shake and generate novel ripples on world history, while others just sit there doing nothing other than precisely what was yesterday's world history. Some books and podcasts and youtube videos make people want to leave their friends and family to join a jihad, some give you strong confidence that a reality-TV star would make a great president, some give you the extraordinary realization that all of society is controlled by a white supremacist patriarchy; all of these lead to novel, unpredictable schisms and re-aggregations, new social formations and subcultures, which in their affective vitality bubble up, viralize or mutualize or enter into arms races, and end up producing system-level outcomes such as electoral victories, migrations, communicating-contagion shooting sprees, various contagious mental pathologies, as well as genuine self- and community-improvement dynamics, unequally distributed. There's nothing better or worse about the Enlightenment Is Cool niche; it's just that it's identity-affective character seems predicated on precisely what we've recently realized is already gone, as demonstrated by the whopping piece of incontrovertible evidence that was my personal lukewarm reception of Joe Rogan's podcast with Steven Pinkman.

You can say I should not generalize from my personal affective experiences, but my personal position seems like it'd be most conducive to liking and being affected by the Pinkman podcast! I'm not talking about the content of his book whatsoever, I'm talking about the reality he takes himself to be playing in. I don't think it's here anymore. First of all, the halo effect of prestige markers is weaker than ever I think. Once upon a time his prestige would have increased the excitement of listening to him. Today, much less. Second, all of the intellectual action today is coming from unique combinations of intellectual horsepower with identity alignments. Jordan Peterson is blowing up in part because he's a smart, credentialed intellectual with a message but specifically because he gives an image of admirable life for a certain type of person. It's not that JP lovers are now changing the world in a way Pinkman lovers will not, it's that JP's identity-affective alignment is not already priced in by the status quo from which Pinker's authority derives (JP tapped emotional needs not already being supplied, through new media, not prestige; hence the socio-political splash). Hell, Joe Rogan himself, who no Serious Intellectual would even call an intellectual, is making similar waves in the intellectual ecology because his basic intelligence and character combine with a certain affectively attractive performance of life that he offers to certain types of people. I could go on.

The problem for traditional public intellectuals on the Liberal Vocation model is that the image of life they herald is radically unavailable to most people so the aspirational inroad to affective alignment is close to nil; it's actually genuinely contemptible to many people (and this is getting worse as the very real racket-nature of much academia is becoming increasingly transparent; ironically the hard-science backlash against postmodernism might have unintended consequences in this regard); and the information they're able to share with the unwashed masses tends to be freely available anyway. Or worse, listeners/readers can usually find someone rehearsing the same information who also offers an identity-performance more affectively aligned with their own temperament and social position. So vanilla prestige intellectuals don't have a monopoly on the information, they no longer even have an advantage on trustworthiness given widespread mistrust toward most institutions, and they uniquely, sorely lack one of the biggest drivers of intellectual impact in the new ecology: affective-identity alignment with moving and shaking niche audiences. (Although note that, with the global internet, "niche" can very well mean several millions of people). To make matters even worse, their cultivated knack for walking the line of polite respectable "good taste" is actually a negative on the balance sheet of their social influence.

Here's another data point. I was struck by the nearly instant appearance of so many reviews and commentaries, almost all of which were ideologically colored. I don't mean that in a bad way necessarily, I just mean so many of the usual suspects were saying things to the effect you would expect them to say. And when most of those items would appear on my radar, my eyes would just glaze over. But think about the commentary that most struck me, and by "struck" I mean this combination of intellectual horsepower plus temperamentally conditional excitement. I'm talking about the post by RS Bakker that inspired this post (by the way I really wanted to just hammer out a quick 500-word thing, but this always happens, which is why I can't let myself sit down to "write a quick 500-word thing" very often). As I said, I read it quickly on the train, and at this point I don't even really remember what it said. All I know is that it had intelligent comments about Adorno and Nietzsche and their critiques of Enlightenment modernity. It was scientifically competent as far as I could tell, and then it had some kind of batshit scientific extensions I didn't really understand but which seemed promising maybe. It was only after I read the post that I wanted to see who this guy was, and from what I could grok apparently he writes fiction but also co-authored with someone in Nature? (!).

So just reflect on this for a moment. Prestige scientist I admire writes book about philosophical/political topics I am highly interested in, he does a podcast that has no effect on me, a million reviews from prestige outlets come out and I can't feel any reason to care about any of them, and it just so happens that the one item in the intellectual ecology that affected me (e.g. motivated novel production on my part), was maybe the one fiction writer in the world who has a publication in Nature writing something on his personal blog (and I didn't even know anything about him until after I read the piece). That's so strange... or rather, it would be strange if we were living even in the 1970s or even the 1990s, but it's not at all strange today. Of course there exists in the world some scientifically sophisticated blogger able to talk deeply about Adorno and Nietzsche, of course he has a blog, and of course it would find its way onto my radar. Of course it would strike me, and of course as a young academic myself right now I am more motivated to write long blog posts than do my institutional duties. Of course, this is the new reality. The real puzzle is how and why the respectable prestige dancehall of liberalism v1.0 is still populated with a good number of really smart people, when all of the music is clearly pumping out of a variegated, thousand-room warehouse of the less compromising... liberalism flatlining at degree zero.

[snarktheater]

Shadowhunters — Episode 2x14

Today on Shadowhunters: we're actually going back to the central plot, and that means I have good news! Indeed, my existential crisis of the past couple episodes is over and we're back to sucking!

We open this episode with Jace playing the soulful piano. You know, that soulful piano music that always comes up in media. (It's Chopin's Nocturne No 20, and honestly I had to look it up because I'm terrible at memorizing classical pieces that I didn't play myself)

Sebastian comes in, and waxes poetics about how great of a musician Jace is. I would express my disbelief, but it's Sebastian, so I tend to just assume everything nice he says is a lie anyway. He goes on to say he never learned how to play, and acts somewhat jealous when Jace says Valentine taught him. Even though Valentine did so by breaking Jace's fingers whenever he made a mistake. Which is totally how you get good at piano!

Anyway, Jace is still having an affair with Maia, leading to this totally-not-foreboding exchange:

"I thought you had a thing for Clary." […] "Well, she has a boyfriend. She's moved on, I've moved on. It's ancient history."

Yeah, I'm sure that'll stick until the end of the episode.

And with that, it's time to talk about the actual plot. See, after Kaelie went on mass-murdering and the Institute showed its fascist leanings in response, Alec, as the newly-appointed head of the Institute, has to clean up Jace's mess and fix everything. Which he plans to do by organizing a "cabinet" of Downworlder representatives to talk to him and establish more transparency in all Shadow world dealings. A couple Shadowhunters talk shit about that decision, making a jab about Alec dating Magnus, and I'm sure they're totally not a red herring for when things go to shit.

Meanwhile, Alec is sending Jace and Clary on a mission to the Seelie Court to investigate Kaelie. See, Alec requested an audience to the Seelie Queen, but she only agreed to talk to "Valentine's experiments". And—you can guess the amounts of "oh no" that this announcement caused. Because I thought we'd escaped this scene from City of Ashes, yet…evidently not.

I do not want this scene, guys. I mean, I guess it's nice that it was postponed until after Clary and Jace stop thinking they're siblings, but still. I don't want this scene to happen. You guys probably all know what I'm talking about.

So once again our main characters are split into two plots, and let's get the Seelie one out of the way first so I can move past that scene as quickly as possible. Turns out, Simon tags along, even though the Seelie Queen didn't invite him, because…he doesn't want to let Clary out of his sight. Which is totally not patronizing or anything. It doesn't help that Clary's on board, and acting like it's basically a date for them, even after Jace insists this is dangerous.

"Jace, you're not gonna get him to change his mind."

I mean, how much more contrived do you get. At least City of Ashes had the three of them together because they just happened to be together when they decided to visit the Queen. Hell, you could have just said the Queen invited Simon along because he's a Daylighter. Especially because, spoiler, she hoped for him to come along anyway. No need to make this contrived shit and make Clary suddenly act much less competently than she's been in a while on this show.

So they enter the Seelie realm by jumping into a creek in Central Park, because landmarks or something, and Clary and Simon keep being obnoxious.

"You know, for a dangerous mission, the Seelie Court's pretty romantic." "It's like being dropped in a fairytale. Which makes sense, fairies do live here."

I'm sort of floored that after using "Seelie" for twenty-six episodes, the show decides to use "fairy" anyway. Why even bother with the name change then?

Simon soon gets trapped in a…"kill tree". Which is a thing, apparently. It's exactly what it sounds like, by the way, and Jace has to save him. And yet Simon is still not deterred by his near-death experience.

"That tree almost tore Simon's pretty face off." "You think I'm pretty?"

And people wonder why I don't like Simon.

He gives them the usual "don't touch or eat anything" speech, which you'd think they would have gone through before entering this realm, but okay. And with that, it's on to the Seelie Queen's palace, with the Queen looking like a child. And this somehow confuses Clary, because the concept of unaging beings (or in this case, a being who can change her appearance at will) is totally foreign to her, even though she's friends with Magnus, a centuries-old warlock who looks like he's in his twenties.

You know, I'm getting the feeling someone involved in this episode really doesn't like or understand Clary as a character. Considering it's the first episode for both this episode's writer (though she was writing assistant on season one) and the director, it's hard to pinpoint where the blame goes, but either way…this isn't good.

Anyway. The Queen keeps trying to elude questions about Kaelie, saying she sent a proxy to their cabinet meeting specifically so she wouldn't have to talk business herself. Jace keeps trying to steer the conversation back to Kaelie, who was apparently a knight of the Seelie Court in this version.

"Were you surprised to hear one of your knights was killing Shadowhunters? "Were you? Kaelie was your lover."

Oh yeah, turns out Jace lied to Clary about how he knew Kaelie, and this is a big deal because…I don't know, stupid straight people reasons.

Clary, in a shocking moment of usefulness amidst this episode, just flat-out asks if Kaelie was working alone, because Seelies can spin the truth but they still have to actually speak the truth. The queen says another knight was involved, but she already killed them. Which is relatively unconvincing, but hey, did you really expect this to be solved today? The Queen has to go on and be Sebastian's ally/lover at some point, assuming this show follows the rest of the books in concept if not in execution.

Speaking of "if not in execution", the queen asks for a moment alone with Simon. After an awkward attempt at making the show's world more "real" by claiming that Sia and Bjork are actually Seelies and/or working with them, the Queen offers to sponsor Simon's music career as well, and basically implying she wants to ally with him against the Shadowhunters.

"There's a reason why my people have survived longer than any creature on this Earth. We know when to choose the winning side."

There's a reason why this speech was given to a villain in the books, show. The Queen is supposed to be a cunning political expert and master manipulator. Trying to turn a guy against Shadowhunters, when his friends are primarily Shadowhunters, without even trying to worm her way into his good graces, is not something that matches these traits.

I'm starting to think the issue in this episode isn't just with Clary, but with women in general. And wait until we get to Isabelle's stuff this episode.

Meanwhile, we gotta set up that scene, so Jace suddenly empathizes with Simon forcing his way into their mission.

"You know, you can't really blame him. If I were him, I'd never leave your side either."

I just…how regressive to you have to be to think this is actually a romantic line and not, you know, a creepy stalker line?

Simon barges in, tells them they need to leave immediately. Because, again, that was shitty manipulation on the Queen's end. But the Queen decides that she'll fuck shit up even more, and traps Jace and Simon in magic vines of truth. See, when Jace saved Simon of the "kill tree" earlier, they squished a few bugs, and those were actually fairies of some kind, so the Queen owns their lives by fairy logic. And of course she offers a game.

"The kiss that will set them free is the kiss you most desire."

Gee, I am shocked.

Yes, it is that scene. And Clary fails to free them by kissing Simon. And even then she still can't figure out why until the Queen basically prompts her to kiss Jace. Because this episode doesn't even trust Clary to understand her own feelings.

"This means nothing."

Is that an ironic echo of Maia's line from last episode, or just an unhappy coincidence? Well, either way, the vines disappear but Clary and Jace keep making out, because they're just so in love and totally not self-conscious about 1) Clary's boyfriend and 2) the murderous millennia-old fairy queen who are watching. Not to mention the Queen's entourage, who are also right there.

The worst part is? The show tries to justify this as political manipulation.

"I told you, Daylighter. They always choose their own kind."

Except…not? This is a case of just one individual Shadowhunter choosing another over Simon, for romantic purposes. It's not like Clary had to choose to only save one of them and let Simon die or anything. It's a bad metaphor and you are bad for trying to salvage that scene in the first place, and worse for failing in a way that makes the scene even worse than in the books.

Yes, I've said it.

Okay, let's move on to today's other subplot: the cabinet meeting. Alec's got representatives from everyone but werewolves (and yes, it's exactly who you think it is, a.k.a. Magnus, Raphael and Meliorn), and so he visits Luke to ask him to join. Luke, however, is still stuck on one character motivation. Well, two: destroying the Soul-Sword to prevent it from being used against more Downworlders, and killing Valentine. Neither are within Alec's power, and also, there's no sense in killing Valentine with any sense of immediacy, but hey, who cares that this flies in the face of Luke's established character as a pretty reasonable guy?

He refuses, but later receives an anonymous fire message, leading him to an abandoned phone, where he gets a call from an anonymous source offering access to Valentine's cell at the Institute so Luke can kill him during the cabinet meeting. Gee, I wonder who that could be.

Also, remember Ollie? Luke's partner who's way too curious? Yeah, she's still around, trying to be relevant. And totally inconspicuous. I mean, it's normal to find someone in the middle of the night, at a restaurant you clearly weren't expecting to find them, to ask about paperwork, right? Yeah, no one's gonna suspect a thing. She investigates the Jade Wolf as soon as Luke leaves, and while she finds nothing, we see her browsing the pictures she took later, and there's a wolf in the background. Damn these werewolves and their inability to stay hidden when the plot requires it!

Anyway. Let's move on to another unreasonable person, since Alec moves on to call Magnus and tell him they need to keep a professional distance during the meeting, so it doesn't look like Alec is being biased in favor of warlocks. It's a fair request, considering the circumstances…so of course Magnus is offended. Worst part is, aside from them acting a little stiff during the meeting, it doesn't even impact the rest of the episode. And to an extent, this does fit Magnus's character, but it still annoys me, so…there.

Then Maryse shows up to congratulate Alec on his promotion. It's cute, but let's be real, it's mostly here to re-establish Robert's affair and that Maryse won't divorce him (for political reasons), even if they're separated.

Meanwhile, Isabelle is angrily training because she heard her mom was in town, reminding me that I am, in fact, bisexual.

Jokes aside, Sebastian shows up to ask her what's going on, and Isabelle angsts about being unable to live up to her mother's expectations. Sebastian points out it's okay to struggle, but also, that she's better than she realizes, which he proves by trying to attack her by surprise and Isabelle immediately blocking the attack. I'm not sure how that relates to her struggles, which are mostly mental, but whatever.

More important question: why is Sebastian everyone's therapist now? I mean, he's even giving mostly solid advice. Is he just trying to get everyone to trust him? If so, sure, but why help hem recover from their troubles?

And with all of these things set up, let's skip to the cabinet meeting itself. By which I mean they have a small reception first, with Isabelle part of the welcoming committee. And…I don't know how to feel about the fact that Isabelle literally says she's here to make the Downworlders feel comfortable. I mean, no shit, she dated two of them. I don't know if it's smart, kind of sexist (since, you know, she has no voice in the actual meeting), or both. Probably both, though.

In spite of Isabelle's presence (or…to an extent, because of it), there's plenty of drama at said reception. Magnus and Alec have a sass-off over the professional distance thing, then Maryse tries to present her condolences to Luke, who's just flat-out meant to her.

"I feel terrible that I couldn't be here at her rite of mourning." "I couldn't be here either. The Clave banned all Downworlders for attending."

I mean, he's right to be pissed, but why be pissed at her?

And then, the worst part: Raphael meeting Sebastian, who is conveniently working security. And they immediately engage in a cock fight over Isabelle. Note that Sebastian hasn't even really expressed romantic interest in her yet. He's mostly just being friendly, and sure, we know he has an ulterior motive, but 1) it's not romantic or sexual and 2) Raphael doesn't know that, since he doesn't know the guy. So…thanks for that unpleasant, unnecessary scene. Wait, what do you mean there's more coming out way?

Well, first we get to the business talk. Except Luke still demands Valentine's death, especially after Magnus, in the name of transparency, tells everyone about the body-swapping business from a couple episodes ago. So Luke walks out, claiming he needs to call his pack about this? Yeah, no, he's calling his anonymous guy and we all know it.

And while he's off, the others take a recess, which means there's more cock fighting. The one thing I'm grateful for is that Meliorn, while present, seems mostly amused by Raphael's attitude. Unfortunately, knowing it could be a three-way fight and therefore worse doesn't make this bearable.

"So what're your intentions with Isabelle?" "I'm sorry, are you serious? […] That is rich, coming from the guy who used to feed on her."

Good point, Sebastian…until he starts telling Raphael to stay away from Isabelle because he triggers her addiction. I mean, it's a good point, but isolating people from their friends is also a classic abuse tactic (which Raphael himself used a few episodes ago, lest you thought I forgot), and while Sebastian is a villain…could we just not use these if we can avoid it?

Also missing from this subplot even though it's centered around Isabelle: Isabelle actually getting a word in on the discussion. As I said, this episode has a problem with its portrayal of women.

So, Luke sneaks around and bumps into Maryse, who again tries to apologize for the way she treated him all these years. Luke more or less just walks away from the conversation in the most conspicuous way possible, because he sucks at that stealth thing, but Maryse doesn't suspect a thing, so…this doesn't go anywhere.

On the plus side, Maryse then finds Isabelle, leading to the one nice scene in this episode. Yes, really, there's a nice scene. Maryse tells her about Robert's affair, Isabelle reveals that she knew, and Maryse actually commiserates with her daughter having to keep the secret for years. Even better: Isabelle also tells Maryse about her addiction, and Maryse is still supportive.

"Oh, Isabelle, you poor thing. […] I am so sorry. This is all my fault. […] I've been so hard on you. Put so much pressure, of course you needed a release."

It's good, and it also acknowledges that addiction is more related to psychological factors rather than the substance itself, and I just like to see Maryse and Isabelle making things up.

Unfortunately, this scene exists solely as a setup for Maryse to tell Isabelle not to give up on love, even if her parents' marriage is falling apart. Which sounds out of place in their conversation, and is there only to lead into a later scene where Raphael takes Sebastian's "advice" and decides to stay away from Isabelle, with the implication that Isabelle will fight for their love. That they totally have. Don't question it.

Anyway, I got sidetracked again, but…well, you can guess what happens next with the Luke plan: he makes it into Valentine's cell, then Sebastian just happens to have noticed him sneaking off and brings Alec to catch Luke red-handed. Alec breaks up the fight and arrests Luke, with Sebastian having a Meaningful Exchange™ with Valentine.

"You don't get to die today." "Do I know you?"

Alec decides not to punish Luke as a show of good faith, to prove to the Downworlders that he doesn't see them as enemies.

"One thing's for sure: Valentine's not safe here."

Took you long enough to acknowledge it, after three attempts to break him out and/or kill him, one of which you participated in, Alec.

And so that's the end of the episode. Well, we have some wrap-up. Clary bangs on Simon's door, saying the Queen tricked them, but Simon's too busy brooding to listen to her. Meanwhile, Jace reports to Alec about their mission, saying he still suspects the Queen to be involved even if her hands are officially clean with the Kaelie thing. Clary also refuses to talk to Jace about what happened, because she needs time to process, and she and Isabelle end up crying together about their boy troubles. As you do.

And finally, we close the episode on more soulful piano, and plot twist! It's Sebastian, who totally knows how to play even though he said he couldn't. Oh, and he's holding someone prisoner in his apartment, but hey, I don't know which is worse.

"Keep quiet. Or I'll have to punish you again. And you wouldn't like that."

You mean sebastian might be…a villain? No wayyyyyy.

So…after the uptake in quality over the past two episodes, it's almost reassuring to find out that yes, as soon as the show goes back to (mostly) sticking to book material, it also goes back to being pretty bad.

I've already pointed out the issue with women throughout the episode, which is the biggest issue here. I mean, sure, Maryse and Isabelle get a good scene, and it's also nice to see Isabelle and Clary getting to sympathize with each other rather than being at odds, but that pales compared to the fact that Clary and Isabelle both got reduced to passive elements in love triangles. Add to that the incompetent portrayal of Clary and the Seelie Queen, and…yeah.

And lest we forget, it's not like the men fare much better, because the patriarchy usually goes both ways. Simon is an egocentric asshole who basically ruins Clary and Jace's mission, and then doesn't even give Clary a chance to talk it out with him. Jace sides with his decision at the end, and immediately leaps at Clary once it's apparent she still wants him, having to be told that Clary's upset because he can't intuit that on his own. Raphael acts possessive of Isabelle, then lets her go when Sebastian brings up the addiction, and at no point is Isabelle herself factored into his decisions. And Sebastian is, as I mentioned, literally using abuse tactics. Alec and Magnus are the only ones who come out ahead, and in Magnus's case, it's mostly because he's barely relevant here.

So…a trite plot and the worst characterization in a while. It's almost a homecoming.

[laboratorium2d]

The Canons of Trump

For obvious reasons, I have been following the news, and the news as refracted through social media, very closely since mid-spring. Unavoidably, this has meant that I have been subjected to a much higher than usual dose of Trump nonsense, and nonsense Trump takes. He says and does stupid and terrible things on a near-constant basis, which are then surrounded and amplified by a fog of overinterpretation. There is much less there there than meets the eye.

Over the last four painful years, I have developed some rules of thumb for making sense of Trump news. Most of them are designed to keep me from overthinking things. I offer them up in the spirit of helping us make it to November, and to help in the process of driving Trump and Trumpism from public life.

Trump Speaks Only to His Base

"MAGA loves the black people" is not meant to persuade African-Americans that they should be Trump supporters. It is meant to persuade Trump supporters that they are not racist. The optics of driving off peaceful protesters with tear gas are not bad, in his view, because his supporters want peaceful protesters driven off with tear gas. Suspend all your normal reactions as a citizen or as a human being; they are not a useful guide to how he and his base think. Corollary: when Trump talks about suburbs under siege, remind yourself that this is what people who don't live in suburbs think people who do are afraid of.

Dominance Politics

Josh Marshall: "[T]he entirety of Trump’s political message is dominance politics. ... Trump attacks, others comply and submit." David Auerbach: "[F]or him, the only acceptable outcome is the one where he wins and you get screwed. ... Trump always defects because he wants to maximize how much worse you do than him--not because he wants to maximize his own payoff." Trump always pushes the button.

The Cruelty Is the Point

Trump's policies are unnecessarily cruel, not by accident but intentionally. Tearing migrant children from their parents is his signature policy, precisely because it is so terrible. Trump's natural meanness is a perfect fit for supporters who want their government to violate human rights. (Source: Adam Serwer)

The Stupidity Is Also the Point

Most Americans are not idiots. But most Americans devote very little attention to politics. Nuking hurricanes and injecting bleach are astonishingly terrible ideas. But they sound plausible enough to someone who is barely listening. Trump is an idiot savant of political communication because his limited intelligence matches many people's limited attention. His inability to formulate complex thoughts comes across as authenticity.

Trump's Razor

Josh Marshall: "[T]he stupidest possible scenario that can be reconciled with the available facts" is probably correct. Too many examples to list, but nothing tops, "If we stopped testing right now, we’d have very few cases, if any." Trump doesn't believe that tests make him look bad by finding cases; he believes that tests make him look bad by causing cases.

Ten Minute Increments

Maggie Haberman: "He will say whatever he has to say to get through ten minute increments of time." Trump does not think ahead. There is no long-term plan when he speaks. He likes rallies where he can riff and ramble for as long as he likes. He likes friendly interviews. In any other situation, when he is being pressed for any reason, he will say anything that comes to mind that seems like it will make the immediate problem go away. His notorious word salad is one coping mechanism; so is making big but impossibly vague promises.

Trump Is a They, Not an It

Kenneth Shepsle's "Congress is a 'They,' Not an 'It'" argues that it is a category mistake to attribute intentions to a multi-member body. Legislators voting for a bill may not share the same purpose, or even the same understanding of what it does. Reader, I am here to tell you that the same thing is true of the shambling mess of rage, impulses, and distractions that is Donald Trump. A Trump tweet might reflect his own deliberations, but just as often is something he saw on Fox, or someone said to him on the phone, or something that Dan Scavino wrote.

From God to Fox to Trump

There is a close correlation between whatever is on Fox News and what Trump says and tweets, often in real time. If something seems like a non sequitur, look for a source upstream.

Trump is Chaff

Leon Wolf: "Donald Trump is the political equivalent of chaff, a billion shiny objects all floating through the sky at once, ephemeral, practically without substance, serving almost exclusively to distract from more important things – yet nonetheless completely impossible to ignore."

Low-Pass Filter

A low-pass filter blocks signals that change quickly, only significant long-term changes get through. This is the opposite of how the press and social media work. Social media amplify things that are already being shared widely right now, and journalists compete online by trying to be first. But most Trump tweets, quotes, and leaks are noise. It's okay to ignore the latest bit of chaff; anything important enough to pay serious attention to will be repeated, many many times.

Trump Doesn't Want to Be President, He Wants to Be King

Trump's vision of leadership isn't so much authoritarian as medieval. He wants people to bow down and praise his royal splendor, his brilliance, his feats of prowess. He doesn't have a cabinet or political allies; he has courtiers and nobles. He doesn't understand or care how bureaucracy works, even when he would be far more effective working through it. His daily routines are straight out of Hilary Mantel's portrait of Henry VIII.

Toddler in Chief

Daniel Drezner: "I'll believe that Trump is growing into the presidency when his staff stops talking about him like a toddler." Drezner (now in book form) gets at two points. First, Trump behaves like an ill-behaved small child: bad temper, poor impulse control, short attention span, demands for praise, constant need to be the center of attention. Second, his staff see their job as nannies.

The White House is a They, not an It

Jay Rosen: "There is no White House. Not in the sense that journalists have always used that term. It's just Trump— and people who work in the building. That they are reading from the same page cannot be assumed. The words, 'the White House' are still in use, but they have no clear referent." Other administrations worked hard to send a unified message. Not this one. Trump doesn't even tell his own staff clearly what his policies are, and he frequently changes his mind, so the presumption that a statement from a White House official--even from Trump himself--reflects official policy does not hold.

Working Toward Trump

Historian Ian Kershaw observed that (especially in contrast to the workaholic Stalin) Hitler was just about the last person you would expect to be able to lead a bureaucracy capable of waging a world war and carrying out the mass murder of six million. He was lazy, easily bored, and cultivated administrative chaos. Instead of waiting for clear and specific orders, his supporters "worked toward the Fuhrer": they tried to anticipate policies he would approve of. (More detail here.)

Dignity Wraiths

Josh Marshall: "Rosenstein’s public reputation, which was formidable, has been destroyed. He now joins a legion of Trump Dignity Wraiths, men and women (though mainly men) of once vaunted reputations or at least public prestige who have been reduced to mere husks of their former selves after crossing the Trump Dignity Loss Event Horizon." Corollary by Josh Barro: "[Trump] has stripped only the dignity from people who surrendered it willingly."

To the Cornfield

The Twilight Zone: "They have to think happy thoughts and say happy things because, once displeased, the monster can wish them into a cornfield or change them into a grotesque, walking horror." Trump takes every revenge he can on those who criticize or undercut him. His underlings live in fear of his displeasure, praise him elaborately in public, and generally abase themselves to avoid being sent to the political cornfield. As a result ...

The Republican Party is a Personality Cult

The phrase is Ezra Klein's, but William Saletan said it first: "Donald Trump is the GOP’s warlord. The Republican Party is officially a failed state." On the one hand, Trump is the GOP: Never Trumpers and Trump critics have been effectively sidelined and deligitimized as not real Republicans. On the other hand, the GOP is Trump: the official 2020 platform of the Republican Party is, in its entirety, "the President’s America-first agenda."

[ink-splotch]

you know what would have been great? if ron got sorted into slytherin.

imagine-- we have this kid on the train, the first friend harry meets, with his corned beef sandwiches and smudged nose. ron is eleven years old and he wants gryffindor, because he's a weasley and that's what always happens. but it doesn't happen.

what a way to redeem slytherin house-- or, god, at least complicate it. because ron is petty. he is mean and sharp and ambitious and jealous-- and he is loyal to the ends of the earth. he is all those things, and he is and always has been good.

potter becomes before weasley in the alphabet, so harry says not slytherin please and gets told might as well be gryffindor. percy and fred and george are all sitting there in red and gold, ruffling the already-ruffled hair of the boy who lived, smug, and then ron sits down and the hat spits out slytherin!

c'mon it'd be fun. just imagine--

the weasleys freaking out-- but even that first christmas molly sends him a sweater in beautiful green and silver.

snape taking points from gryffindor when ron breaks rules or mouths off. "i'm in your house." "hm, couldn't tell which weasley it was..." /drifts away

sitting with harry in potions and in flying-- whatever classes they happen to share. meeting up to study. scarfing down their breakfasts at separate tables so they can go hang out in the empty classrooms before the day starts. hermione reads while they play exploding snap.

the trio signing up for all the same electives third year. this friendship being something they earn and work for; not just the one that looked easiest. (not to bash canon ron&harry, the bros to end all bros, but by putting this very obvious obstacle between them-- it makes it that much clearer to the reader that this is a love worth fighting for, because they're fighting for it).

ron being jealous that harry and hermione get to share this house, this home, these hours, while he's stuck with malfoy and parkinson and goyle-- because that would eat him up some days, some months, this insecure kid who's been the last at everything all his life. this kid who always leaves and always comes back.

ron, who constantly compares himself to his brothers-- not as smart, not as popular, not as good. one more nail in that coffin, here, yeah? he's not a prefect, not a quidditch star, not a troublemaker-- and even when he becomes those things, someone else has always gotten there first. 

well, i guess he got to this house first at least

ron still snaps at snape in potions, after hermione's been ignored three times, "you know, sir, i think hermione might know the answer." he still pulls the bars off harry's window with a stolen, flying car. he still shows harry around the burrow shyly, not knowing what a wonder a warm home is. he still stands up in the shrieking shack as best as he can with a broken leg and tells a mass murderer that if he wants harry he'll have to go through him first. 

ron weasley is a lot of things, but one of them is absolutely a true friend.

in their second year:

when everyone calls harry the heir, they eye ron at his side and sniff.

when hermione lays petrified in the medical ward, ron sits at her side and reads her homework assignments aloud and thinks my house this was my house. 

when ron hugs ginny's damp, shaking frame after the chamber, ron says sorry and sorry and are you okay and i'm so sorry and ginny calls him an idiot.

the trio spends more time in the library with hermione, since ron can't come to gryffindor tower to study, and homework remains a thing that has to happen. fred and george constantly try to sneak him into the tower anyway. 

"c'mon, ronnykins, you belong here, you deserve it, no one's gonna fuss, it's your BIRTHRIGHT," and ron fusses and rolls his eyes at them

and then in fourth year in one of those periods where he's not talking to harry and harry's not talking to him-- he just snaps at the twins

because it's not, alright?

not his birthright, not his house, and maybe no one would fuss if he snuck in, maybe no one would care, and that makes it worse not better, because then he's just that weasley who should've been gryffindor

and isn't

(and harry overhears this caterwauling, feels his heart fall to his toes, and goes and awkwardly asks ron if he wants to go a few laps on his firebolt). 

(because, god, harry-the-chosen-one, harry-in-the-cupboard-under-the-stairs, harry-who'll-save-us-all-- he knows what it's like to have should have beens on your shoulders, and he knows what it's like to not be wanted).

ron cheers for gryffindor during quidditch matches in those first few years, and sits with hagrid and hermione and neville. harry's seeker, and fred and george are beaters, and ginny becomes chaser eventually, and honestly screw the slytherin team. they have each and every one of them said disparaging things about ron's mother.

harry and hermione badger ron into trying out for keeper fourth year; he and harry have been practicing on the quidditch pitch because its a non-library-shaped place to hang out where both of them are allowed. ron makes the slytherin roster, and malfoy grudgingly provides ron a team broom after the captain chews him out for a bit.

"he may be a weasley, but he's our keeper, don't you want to win, draco"

but the sort of things they spit in the locker room, the words the players hiss or snigger, the slurs that come easy to their tongues-- ron would like to say that he considered just walking out of the cesspit, but instead he snipes and sasses and shouts and sometimes tries to spell slugs at the worst of them. 

it doesn't do much, that one irritated voice of protest-- except that it does. and he's got a new (hand-me-down) wand, after the gilderoy fiasco, so the slugs even come out the right end.

fred gives him a black eye with a bludger one time (though ron does manage to block the quaffle) and molly sends a howler to gryffindor table with the morning post. ("RON DID YOU TATTLE") ("IT WAS CLEARLY PERCY, FRED, SIT DOWN")

(the weasleys often have family conversations across the great hall, with hufflepuffs and ravenclaws covering their ears long-sufferingly between them)

in the lake, it's still ron hanging there in the water, still and bloated. it's still harry's heart that stutters in his chest, for all it's just a game, just a game, just a game, right?

ron listens hard and tries to talk himself out of fist fights, all that next year in the slytherin common room as they read aloud rita skeeter articles.

when hermione calls dumbledore's army to its first session in that pub, there are green scarves in that crowd-- ron and one of the beaters who ron's gotten to help glare to rest of the slytherin quidditch team into submission.

ron beats draco to being prefect (i think i remember it was dumbledore and not mcgonagall who seemed to award prefect status-- snape doesn 't get a say).

percy is SO PROUD, as usual, but so are fred and george. "did you see the little malfoy git? green with shame, my god."

when harry has the dream about sirius, ron isn't there to wake. but when draco's pulled out of bed to be a professional bully-- er, i mean inquisitorial squad member-- ron follows at a careful distance and curses draco from behind. 

they ride thestrals over london. harry finds the prophecy and ron thinks about the sorts of things that get decided at your birth.  

sirius black was a son of slytherin who had a lion living in his chest that he couldn't hide away. 

ron was meant to be gryffindor, and through a haze of injury and fear he watches sirius die just out of harry's reach.

just imagine: ron with his temper and his sharp words and his fierce loyalty. ron who looks into the mirror of erised and sees house cups and prefect badges and ambitions earned-- he could belong in slytherin. there is nothing wrong with wanting things, and he wants them so bad.

there are so many reasons to fight a war, and so many ways. harry and his sacrifices, his loving resignation. hermione's good right hook and bottomless bag of supplies. luna, brilliant and a bit batty. lee jordan's radio and mcgonagall's burning patience and brittle, certain bones.

just imagine: when the last battle comes, there is a slytherin on the field who is not snape.

when draco and his parents walk away, in that last battle, ron--

who slept in the same dormitory as the boy for six years

who heard draco's nightmares and saw him paling and desperate all sixth year

who is as pureblooded as lucius's spoiled whelp

who remembers grimacing at the thought of squibs

who has known magic all his life

who spotted draco penning letters home to his mother every sunday and hiding them when the other boys could see--

ron sees them going.

he sounds no alarms. he says no farewells.

he turns back to his friends, and his fight, and lets them be.

just imagine: when harry kneels on the train platform and his second son asks him "but what if i get sorted slytherin, dad?" harry can say, "the bravest man i ever knew was in slytherin house. whatever you are, wherever you go, we're going to be so proud of you." 

and they can both gaze over to where ron is squawking beside his daughter's trolley of luggage because crookshanks (who will live to be forty eight million years old) has latched onto his shins with a violent fondness.

[dy1kjxxa-blog]

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[snarktheater]

Shadowhunters S2 — Episode 9

You know what we need after leaving on "Clary could be used to trigger a weapon of mass destruction" last episode? Opening this one on Clary and Simon making out! Don't get me wrong, it's a cute enough scene and the actors manage to summon some great chemistry, but it's just kind of…in the way.

Oh, and also, Jace walks in on them just as they're in the process of taking off their clothes, acting like your typical alpha male as usual. But before he and Simon can start pulling out their dicks and measuring, Clary's hands starts turning black and charred.

Meanwhile at Magnus's apartment. Alec angsts about what might happen to the Downworlders, including Magnus. Magnus doesn't care about potential genocide, though.

"I know things may seem bleak, but…nothing was as devastating as seeing you standing on that ledge."

He even claims the magic that drove Alec to nearly jump to his own death could only have worked on already-existing fear, so maybe it's all already there.

Their moment doesn't last, since Clary comes asking for help about her hand. It's part of Iris's blood oath, meaning Clary has to find Madzie before the magic reaches her heart. Jace immediately asks if there's a way to undo it (there isn't), but…honestly, why aren't they trying to find Madzie? If only out of being decent people and because it'll lead them to Valentine, the guy they need to stop from committing genocide? It's unsurprising to up the stakes like this, but still, it should have already been the plan, shouldn't it?

They get Luke's help to look for Madzie where she was first abducted, since they now have Iris in custody and willing to cooperate. Also, Clary insists to have Simon come along, which Jace is against, because he does a really poor job at hiding his jealousy.

As she goes fetch Simon, Clary gets attacked by a random werewolf, but she fights it off surprisingly well. It's Maia, and she attacked because…she overheard the Soul-Sword talk and decided that getting rid of Clary was an easier way to solve the issue. Which, fair enough. But also…why are you so intent on making Maia as antagonistic as possible, show?

"You think this is easy? You know me, you know I don't want to hurt anybody!"

Really? Because I'm pretty sure that's about half of your appearances so far where you tried to murder a main protagonist in cold blood.

Anyway, this interruption basically means Luke has to stay behind and make sure the rest of the pack (and possibly the rest of Downworld) doesn't follow Maia's example. So we're left with the love triangle to go after Madzie.

Cut to Valentine's new hideout…a carnival, because horror clichés or something. He exposits that he will raise Madzie to be loyal to him. Oh, and also, he wants Dot (who's…still alive?) to cast some spell, but she can't because of all the experiments Valentine did to her, so he tells Dot to teach Madzie instead.

Back to the protagonist. They find traces of Valentine kidnapping Madzie through Portal, and keep investigating the scene for some reason, even though a Portal should mean there isn't much of a trace to follow. But on the plus side, there's a random homeless guy there who just happens to have picked up Madzie's shirt. But he won't give it up until Simon suggests trading it for Jace's jacket, because…I guess that justifies Simon's presence?

So they now track her, but Jace deduces that if Valentine hasn't blocked out tracking her, it might be a trap. And hey, that's a good point! How about you leave Clary behind so Valentine doesn't have what he needs? I mean, sure, Jace also has angel blood and could activate the Sword, but they don't know that, so having Clary walk into a trap that they know is a trap when they have alternatives is just ridiculous. Unless the blood oath means Clary has to be there when Madzie is freed?

At least Clary tells the boys they can't let Valentine take her alive. Of course, considering she's with her love triangle, that is probably not going to work out. Oh sure, Jace promises, but I have some serious doubts about his ability to follow up on that promise.

Anyway, let's take a break from the main plot to head into a subplot that I didn't even know what going on, but apparently is.

The Downworld council meeting subplot

Because that's a thing, apparently. And unfortunately there's some setup before we get to it.

First is Isabelle. She's summoned by Aldertree, who congratulates her on her apparent recovery from yin fen addiction. So…he knew about the addictive element of it too? How much more of an asshole does this guy get?

Well, of course there's an answer: he asks her out to dinner. When she gracefully turns him down, he immediately grabs her wrists and more or less says he won't take no for an answer. Because what girl wouldn't go for he guy who pushed drugs on her?

Alec actually comes ask Aldertree what's wrong with Isabelle, because he's also realizing that something is…well, wrong. Aldertree either doesn't realize there's a connection with the yin fen or is actively trying to harm her.

"Isabelle is more than capable of handling herself."

Cut to…Isabelle hanging out with Raphael and learning to cook from him. Because he cooks for his sister's church community every Sunday, dark backstory, boo hoo, cry for the brooding boy. Yeah, I'm finding it hard to care. Oh, and of course the scene concludes with Isabelle manipulating him into biting her again. But hey, the showrunners are totally saying that Raphael is asexual on Twitter, so I guess the romantic/sexual framing of the scene is completely coincidental! (Hint: it's not)

Anyway, Luke, Raphael and Magnus meeting with Meliorn in the one bar in New York to discuss the situation. Meliorn has been scarred for helping Clary in season one, and he and his followers are wearing armor, which is bad news on some vague-ass level because it means war.

Anyway, the reason Luke brought them here is to tell them about the Soul-Sword, and about Valentine needing Clary, because he's that stupid. So…yeah, Meliorn immediately suggests killing Clary.

"This council is biased. You've allowed yourself to become too involved with Shadowhunters."

I mean…that's true. Although how does he know about Raphael and Isabelle?

"I'd recognize that perfume anywhere."

Also, Meliorn flat-out says Raphael has "feelings" for Isabelle, and Raphael clearly acts jealous that Meliorn has a history with her, so…again, so much for him being good ace representation in the show. Also, Meliorn taunting him leads Raphael to side with him on the issue of killing Clary.

After the meeting, Magnus calls Alec after the meeting because he knows where Isabelle is. Turns out he's connected the dots between Isabelle's supposed investigation into yin fen trade and being with Raphael, and he tells Alec about it all. So Alec rushes into Raphael's place to get Isabelle out.

But Raphael reveals that Aldertree is the one who got Isabelle addicted in the first place.

"I was only trying to help." "By drinking her blood?" "It may have started with the blood but it's more complicated than that, all right? I care about her. […] I have feelings for her."

Again…great aroace representation.

Alec just wails on Raphael until Magnus magically stops him, but now Alec's angry that Magnus didn't tell him about the yin fen, even though he genuinely thought Isabelle wasn't using it. Alec leaves with Isabelle, while Magnus claims Raphael doesn't really have feelings for Isabelle, he's just confusing that with his addiction for her blood. Is that how you're going to try and get away with it?

Meanwhile, Isabelle's angry at Alec and blames it for not noticing something was wrong…even though he did…and she tells him to leave. Which…he does, for some reason, and she goes away, presumably back to Raphael.

Okay, that's all for this subplot.

Back to the main plot

They get close to their destination, and the boys leave Clary alone in the car to have a talk about how neither of them could kill Clary, so Jace decides to go alone instead while Simon protects Clary. Jace pretends to agree, but as soon as Simon's distracted by Luke calling about the meeting, Jace goes off on his own anyway, because this whole cast is characters who just can't work with anyone else ever.

So Simon's left guarding Clary in the car (or…on top of the van because Clary wants to see the stars one last time before she dies), and they angst together. Simon tries to insist that they do something more proactive, but Clary insists that they stay put and trust Jace, which is actually surprising of her.

Instead we get melodrama.

"If I don't make it—" "Stop. You will. You have to. Think about it, I mean…the dashing, handsome Jewish boy finally admits to his best friend how he feels after a lifetime and she dies a week later? That's too sappy. Like a real-life Fault in Our Stars." "That's not the plot of that book at all!"

Hey, Clary, you can't snark at Simon's dialogue, that's my job!

Meanwhile, Valentine takes Madzie to a restaurant where she shows off her magic, and that's when Jace catches up with them.

"How fatherly. I didn't know you had it in you."

Jace tells her about the blood oath, and threatens to let Clary die if Valentine doesn't let Madzie go.

Back to Clary and Simon, with Clary almost dead from the magic and about to pass out. Jace arrives just on time with Madzie, and when Clary touches her, the spell is broken. So I guess Clary did have to be there. Huh. Would have been nice to know. But who cares about that, let's focus on Simon and Jace's relief and how it gives them a moment of being nice to each other. After all, Clary's only the person who nearly died!

Oh, also, Madzie opens a Portal and kidnaps Clary back to the carnival. Because Valentine is just that good at convincing people. Also, that's…how many times this season?

The boys angst about losing Clary again, and…you know what? Why don't they have anything of Clary's to track her down? Hell, why isn't it standard Shadowhunter protocol to carry something belonging to your partners for this kind of situation? Even if Valentine can block it, it would be nice if they'd actually figured out this basic strategic element by now.

But there's more trouble afoot: a vampire and a Seelie from Valentine's zoo attack a mundane to do…something, probably with the Soul-Sword. And as Alec shows us at the Institute, this is happening all over the city, so the Shadowhunters are a little busy dealing with that right now. Luckily, Simon figures out how to find Clary…but we're not shown how. They just…find another potential victim and save her, and interrogate the vampire who just ran away. And yes, it's the same. And no, I don't know how they found him. Did I miss something?

So they reach the circus, while Alec coordinates a search for Clary against Aldertree's orders, using his pushing drugs on Isabelle as blackmail material.

"Supplying yin fen to a subordinate…an ex-field medic should know better."

Alec is now in charge, basically.

Meanwhile, Jace makes it to Clary, but Valentine and Madzie show up, and Madzie stops Jace. Simon shows up and acts as a distraction…for five seconds before Valentine gets the upper hand on him. So now Valentine leaves with Simon as a hostage to make Clary do his bidding.

Maia's subplot

I didn't know where to put this, honestly.

After Maia tried to kill Clary, Luke locks her up in a closet, which he knows is horrible because she's claustrophobic. She goes as far as to beg and promise she won't go after Clary anymore, and Luke…does it anyway. Also, this closet is in Luke's restaurant, so really, why can't she just make noise until someone frees her?

"I thought you were different."

A sentence that may be more meaningful if you'd actually established Maia's history of abuse.

Anyway, she starts panicking, and…remember how the shift is tied to emotions? Yeah, she starts shifting and wrecking the place. Shocking, I know. Cut to later in the episode, where she's broken out, grabs a coat, and…what? I'm not really sure. She leaves footprints on the floor, but it's not clear if it's blood or something else from the closet she was locked up in, and there's a guy working at the restaurant seemingly unaware, so I'd assume she didn't kill anyone? It's just a weird segue and I have no idea where it's going. Hopefully into the next episode?

Conclusion

As far as Shadowhunters episodes go, this is probably on the better end of the spectrum, which probably has to do at least partly with how little of the original books is in it. And yet…between Isabelle and Raphael's non-romance, and Maia's treatment in general, it still manages to make me angry.

Also, can we go for a while without any more kidnappings and hostage-takings? This is frankly getting repetitive. And you can't even tell me Valentine needs a vampire and a werewolf like he needed in the books, since he has a whole zoo of Downworlders, as Jace called it. So it has to be that Simon's a hostage, right?

Well, who knows. Hopefully we'll find out next time, unless they decide to end season 2a on a cliffhanger too. Of course, since the second half of the season begins tomorrow, we won't have to wait that long either way.