#I love the idea that crowley knows him so well that he knew Aziraphale would be uncomfortable

[ineffableteeth]

You guys know that deleted scene with the Chocolates?

I love how Crowley literally did an entire bit and screwed with Gabriel and Sandalphon with fake voices and everything just so Aziraphale wouldn’t have to go back to heaven lol

If he’s gonna be thwarted it’s gonna be by his husband

Also Aziraphale going off about how Cunning and Brilliant Crowley is such down bad behavior

Context

[dalliancekay]

The 'Aziraphale Still Believes in Heaven' Take

Is one that I see so often. Too often. The way many fans (still) say Aziraphale is so naïve, he's never learned anything, he never changes, Metatron just offered him a promotion and he happily jumped on it. Happy to go back to Heaven. Still in their clutches. Leaving Crowley behind. Cos nothing lasts forever. Amirite? Poor long-suffering Crowley. So patient. Goes through so much. Aww. Takes that say that because Crowley never told Aziraphale about the venom in Gabriel's "Shut your stupid mouth and die already", Aziraphale has no idea that Heaven is not the good guys, that he still believes they are on the side of truth and light.

Takes that claim Aziraphale wants Crowley to come to Heaven and be an angel again so they can be happy like in the good old times. Takes that basically say that Aziraphale is stupid. And blind. LISTEN Do you mean this Aziraphale:

Who knew before Crowley did that something is rotten in the state of Denmark, that things are wrong and one can get in a lot of trouble for a thing as minor as a suggestion to improve things. Is this the Aziraphale that would seriously suggest to Crowley, who he was immediately deeply anxious over, to go back to 'good old times'? What good old times? How is Heaven a place of light when:

A bunch of angels comes down to Earth to bully and PUNCH ONE OF THEIR OWN?

Why would he think they are the light when they shame him for being who he is?

And yes, Aziraphale wants to do good. But that's not tied to him being an angel. And it's not a bad thing ffs! Crowley does good as well. Aziraphale might be the only one who knows, but he knows. Maybe getting humans out of the Garden to seek knowledge was always a (certainty) possibility, and maybe not, but it was Aziraphale's decision to arm them.

And She didn't make him Fall for it. And do you remember when:

Aziraphale first openly questioned that Heaven was actually doing what God actually wanted? He had a think after the Flood, didn't he. He did what he thought was right. He trusted Crowley over his fellow angels, with his own sense of rightness. He and Crowley saved the kids that Aziraphale triple checked the Archangels saw no problem in letting die to make things easier. And She didn't make him Fall for it. In Edinburgh:

Az re-evaluated the thinking he was taught and did a full 180 degree turn, trying in few hours to save the grave-robbing girl AND the possible future lives of children that could be helped via more learning. And when we come to Metatron and his threats, we don't see the full conversation, but don't we see enough? Aziraphale says that he's not interested. Metatron keeps nagging at him. Pushing the symbolic coffee from Coffee or Death at him. Flattering him with obvious untruths. After all, Aziraphale knows what Heaven thinks of him. He tried to reason with Metatron before. Metatron tells him they know how deep his disobedience lies:

Aziraphale is not a fool. He knows this is an offer of come quietly or we will find a way to destroy you and your demon this time. Aziraphale didn't have to hear Metatron's quip of: "For one prince of Heaven to be cast into the outer darkness makes a good story. For it to happen twice, makes it look like there is some kind of institutional problem." He knows the system is rotten. He knows for a LONG time. Did you see his face when he met Muriel and realised what a lonely sad existence they lead.

AND Crowley doesn't love Aziraphale despite the fact that he's being used to get out of trouble, being made to listen about random things the angel enjoys from symphonies to food and plays, and who continues to believe in goodness and kindness. CROWLEY LOVES AZIRAPAHLE BECAUSE OF THOSE THINGS AND because he sees Aziraphale for what he is, an angel who thinks for himself, changes his mind, learns, angel who is brave, who stands for the right thing, who sacrifices his own happiness for the safety of others, especially the demon he loves. They are the same. They are lonely. They are one of a kind. And they love each other.

Aziraphale wants to stay at home. In the home he built for himself and Crowley. On Earth where he's found so much to love. But he knows it is impossible. As Crowley confesses his love, Aziraphale struggles to stay on his plan to push him away, to make him stay. He'll miss Crowley terribly. He wants them to be together. For him, they were an 'us' the whole S2. However tenuously. Fragile existence and all that.

But even this was ripped away from him. And whatever he's planning, he knows he needs to do the first steps on his own. He can't submit Crowley to the torture that being in Heaven is going to be for him, an unwanted, despised angel. And that would be even worse for an unwanted demon. He had to push him away.

So he leaves. Furious. And determined. Whether it is to burn the place down or find God and ask Her all the questions to Her face I don't know. But his love will push him through.

And if I see one more simplistic take of the snarky demon is really good isn't he, so that means the stuffy angel is bad (and needs to change to be worthy of the demon) I will curse their dreams with lines about shades of grey. AZIRAPHALE AND CROWLEY ALREADY LOVE EACH OTHER

[inconveniently-discorporated]

Today it's time for me to be heartbroken about Crowley and HIS version of events, because of course HIS version makes sense to him too.

The thing about Crowley is, he acts so nonchalant about everything.

Like, at first, he's simply just a demon. Sauntered vaguely downward and such, it's barely even really a thing, honestly -- it's just sort of his job title, y'know? Aziraphale's in one department, he's in another, that's just how it is. Like satanists, right?

But then the more the story progresses, the more we get the sense that there's something deeper than that. It becomes especially apparent with his plants, and how he puts the fear of God (then corrected by the narrator: the fear of Crowley) in them.

And these scenes, as many of you well know, have been theorized to be Crowley working through the circumstances of his fall. Projecting his emotions onto the plants, inflicting on them what was done to him. Processing what it was like to be on the other side of the curtain, maybe -- possibly try to figure out what could drive a creator to harm their own creations.

The details of the fall and what Crowley did, exactly, are unclear. The details of what Crowley knows about his own fall are unclear, because evidence could suggest that maybe he doesn't remember. But his perception seems to be that it didn't take much to be a demon.

What he does know, is that nothing lasts forever -- not even the grace of God.

But Aziraphale is different.

Aziraphale is an angel with very black-and-white ideas of what it means to be an angel, and what it means to be a demon.

But Crowley sees through it. From giving away the sword alone, he sees the cracks in Aziraphale's rigid thinking that allows the light to shine through. And he chips and he chips at that thinking -- he asks the kind of questions that probably made him fall in the first place -- until finally we get here.

God saw Crowley at his most innocent. God saw Crowley at his most joyful state of being. God saw him at his holiest.

God heard his questions, likely knowing that Crowley was expressing love in the way that he would want to receive it. Crowley says, "Well, if I was the one running it all, I would like it if someone asked questions. Fresh point of view."

God knew all of this, and then cast him out anyway. Unforgivable, that's what he is. Not to be forgiven, ever. Not to be loved -- not by God.

Then here comes along this angel (who he may or may not remember). This angel knows he's a demon, and talks to him anyway. This angel knows he's a demon, and listens to what he has to say. This angel knows he's a demon, and still looks him in the eye, sees the good in him, and forcefully tells him that HE still sees the good in him, even when God refuses to.

Aziraphale sees everything in Crowley that God could not, and that is something Crowley thought was lost forever.

So it only makes sense that when Aziraphale first burst in with his words all aflutter at the idea that they were going to go back to Heaven and change everything, Crowley felt this was something they couldn't do. Because he understands better than anyone, Heaven has the power to change the angel, the angel does not have the power to change Heaven.

It makes sense that Crowley gave him a chance. Crowley didn't exactly erupt with rage at Aziraphale. Yes, he was loudly against the idea and very disappointed, but then he goes, "Oh. Oh God. Right. Okay. I didn't get a chance to say what I was going to say, I better say it now."

He still thinks there's a chance. He's still giving Aziraphale a chance to back out.

He gives Aziraphale multiple chances. And every time Aziraphale will not back down. Every time, he thinks he hears the same message. The one he's always heard, the one he should know by now but somehow still hopes it isn't true.

Nothing lasts forever.

Not the universal star machine.

Not the grace of God.

Not the bookshop.

Not my acceptance of who you are.

Not us.

He doesn't hear the way Aziraphale remembers his joy and wants him to be happy. He doesn't hear how Aziraphale wants him and needs him and begs for him to be on his side. He doesn't hear the hope and the desire to be safe and together and in control -- forever.

He doesn't hear the way Aziraphale is lying to himself because we all know damn well he would live in a state of comfortable happiness if he could.

Instead, he hears this.

He hears that he is in need of forgiveness. He hears that he has done something to warrant it.

Only, he is unforgivable. Nothing lasts forever, but maybe that part does. Out of everything that never lasted, the one that did is that he is unforgivable the way that he is.

"Don't bother," he says.

Don't bother, because he doesn't hear Aziraphale, he hears God.

Don't bother, because maybe God was right.

[indigovigilance]

Bullet Theory

Thesis: Crowley passed Aziraphale a bullet during the Final Fifteen kiss. This bullet contains his memories. He tucked it under his tongue, then began to access the memories during the ride up the elevator.

Edit: debunked by God himself, in response to this post. As a reminder, please don’t send fan theories to NG.

Proof:

Glint in the mouth

Inspo credit to this post by @somehow-a-human

Yeah so we were already paying way too much attention to that very special four-letter word we thought Aziraphale was going to say, but it so happens that during that cut-off phoneme is the only time you can see this shiny object in his mouth. (catching this on the right frame was emotionally painful and I’m sending Gavin Finney my therapy bills (actually no I’m not I love you very much sir)).

So that’s the basis of this theory. Crowley passed Aziraphale a bullet that he then tucks under his tongue.

Add’l Evidence Post-Kiss

Aziraphale works his jaw after raising his fingers to his lips: [gif]

Then when the Metatron comes in, he turns his back on the Metatron and raises his hand. I originally thought he was wiping his eyes. Now I think he’s raising his hand to his mouth, maybe to spit out the bullet, maybe to make sure it’s secured under his tongue.

Credits Scene

Aziraphale has the craziest fucking look on his face through the credits, we can all agree. But towards the end, his eyes flicker back and forth, as if he is watching or reading something. Then he smiles. I hypothesize that he is still accessing his memories during this time, and getting the information he needs to [redacted].

Thematic Justification: The Bullet Catch

Aziraphale having a bullet in his mouth as part of a two-man act of deception is not a fresh concept by the time we get to The Final Fifteen.

Additionally, the use of surreptitious modes of communication, where messages are passed from person to person inaudabily, is introduced in this same magic trick. 

NB1: I wish I could credit the person who I first saw point this out (relatively recently). It wasn’t even tagged as meta, I don’t think. But the gist was there’s some parallelism between “aim for my mouth but shoot past my ear” and the “pin the lips on the lips” move that Crowley pulls in the Final Fifteen. If I find it I will properly cite.

NB2: One hypothesis that has circulated around, I think creditable to @sendarya, is that Aziraphale mouths “trust me” to Crowley just before he gets on the elevator. This isn’t necessary to the Bullet Theory but it would be thematically consistent.

Small objects carry memories

Why a bullet? Well, it’s a small object that has meaningful significance between the pair of people involved, much like:

Beelzebub introduces us to the idea that a small object like a fly can be used as a storage container for memories. We also see that the object entering the body of the person is a viable way for the memories to be delivered.

(btw Jon Hamm if you’re reading this, you have very pretty eyes)

“I keep a derringer in a hollowed out book”

K, so it’s not like Crowley is just carrying a bullet loaded with Aziraphale’s memories around with him at all times, is it? (I mean, it could be, but probably not. I’ll just point you to this meta for my theories on why, if Crowley had anything that needed to be kept safe, he would keep it in the bookshop.)

We learn in S2E4 that Aziraphale keeps a gun in a hollowed out book somewhere in the shop. A gun wouldn’t be any good without bullets, right? This may not be the reason the derringer was left as a Chekhov’s Gun for S3, but it’s a possibility. If Crowley wasn’t already in possession of a bullet, he knew that he could find one in the shop. Even more likely, the exact bullet used in the 1941 magic trick is a precious keepsake being kept somewhere in the bookshop, and Crowley chose to use that exact bullet because of the memories already directly attached to the object.

Why Aziraphale even has memories to be returned to him

We know that Aziraphale could have had his mind wiped because Heaven has done it before. Certainly once. Probably twice. We know this because when Metatron is announcing that Gabriel, alongside having his memories erased, is being demoted to 38th class, Muriel pipes up and reminds us that they are 37th class:

So this wasn’t a “just Gabriel” thing. Mind-wiping is a routine form of personnel management in Heaven. There is NO reason for us to believe that it didn’t happen to Aziraphale. But in case you need a reason to believe it, here goes:

We know from our interactions with Jim that the person whose memories are missing (1) doesn’t necessarily know and (2) isn’t necessarily distressed by that fact, even if they do. Muriel also fits this “cheerful empty shell” archetype. You know who else does? Ding ding ding. The one and only A. Z. “wiggles with delight” Fell.

I can already hear your very valid counter-argument. This guy is actually terrified out of his mind on any given day that his romance with a demon will be discovered. Yes. Because he’s involved in a romance with a demon. The other two angels we’ve met don’t have this issue. Beyond that, though, these three characters share more in common with each other disposition-wise than any of them do with the other angels we’ve met (Uriel, Michael, Sandolphon, etc.).

We also know that Aziraphale has been [demoted] at some point from Cherub to Principality. This is book canon: 

"Technically Aziraphale was a Principality, but people made jokes about that these days."

This has also been confirmed (insofar as Neil Gaiman ever confirms anything) by Word of God:

(marketing video screengrab clipped for brevity)

We don’t know for sure it was a demotion, but I think we have enough evidence to infer that with a high degree of confidence.

Anyways.

Summary: Aziraphale is a cheerful angel who was demoted and has a name that is not biblical canon. This evidence indicates that was probably mind-wiped. This is not the first time I’m proposing this. It won’t be the last.

How Crowley Did It

My meta on Continuity Errors gives the complete proof for why I believe that Crowley is able to stop time without Aziraphale knowing, and I propose in that meta that the kiss was a cover-up for the exertion of effort necessary to pull that off. I further proposed that during the pause, he retrieved something from the bookshop. At the time of writing, I didn’t know what. Now, I have an inkling that it was a bullet.

If you need a refresher on Clock Theory, here’s one. The idea is that the clock behind Aziraphale shifts by fifteen minutes from before the kiss to after the kiss. This is consistent with a theory that Crowley paused time (but the clock kept running) in order to retrieve the bullet, dump Aziraphale’s memories into it if he hadn’t already, and then return to transfer the bullet to Aziraphale.

Why Crowley Kept the Secret So Long

As with Continuity Errors, I am ending this meta with a very unsatisfactory “I don’t know.” The motivation for Crowley to keep Aziraphale’s memories from him until the very moment he’s about to leave must have been a strong one. I think it has something to do with why Crowley was so insistent on trying to get Aziraphale to run away with him, instead of dealing with whatever’s coming. But as with Continuity Errors, I suspect that the good omens meta hivemind (and the vast collection of people who are posting clues, you have no idea how important you are) will assemble yet more breadcrumbs that we can follow to some sort of hypothesis.

Until then,

iv

(here's my meta index if you would like to read more stuff like this)

[good-soupmens]

Apply this to Aziraphale how you will, but as an autistic person, I REALLY fell for Metatron's kind old man act. I didn't notice the subtle manipulation, like giving Aziraphale coffee and saying "I've ingested things in my time" to show that he's different from the food-hating, earth-hating angels. I didn't notice him taking on Aziraphale's speech mannerisms before turning away and scowling. It was only after reading meta and rewatching twice that I was like WOAH I didn't even see that.

I can see that heaven's system is screwed up, but I literally thought "Metatron's not like the other angels." I trusted his kindness, especially given that he wanted Aziraphale to run heaven, obviously the best angel for the job. I didn't consider that he wanted to appoint him because he knows Aziraphale is powerful and has stopped heaven and hell before.

I was right along with Aziraphale when all of this went down, agreeing with him when he didn't want the job ("where would I get my coffee?") and then seeing the appeal when Metatron said he could run heaven from earth WITH Crowley. They get to keep living the life they carved out for each other AND Aziraphale can fix the corruption in heaven? I love seeing kind-hearted characters fixing broken things, and I wanted him to fix the system.

As for Crowley becoming an angel again, I didn't really think of it as changing him. He's just Crowley, and he'd keep being Crowley. He's good already. I saw it as heaven offering to right their wrong because he never deserved to fall in the first place, and they wouldn't let someone they believed is evil back in, right? I trusted their judgment of Aziraphale and Crowley. I didn't consider that of COURSE Crowley wouldn't want to go back there. Why would he??

So when Aziraphale finally told him about the offer, I was hoping he would agree. It's important, they could change things! Metatron is claiming to give Aziraphale the reins. Crowley and Aziraphale for once are allowed to be together, and Aziraphale was so ready to not hold back in their relationship. There'd be no reason to deny it or go slow, it's obvious that their love is mutual.

It wasn't a surprise that Crowley said no, and deep down, Aziraphale knew why, but he didn't understand. Crowley and Aziraphale weren't seeing how the other saw it (that Aziraphale WANTS to be together. He wants to make heaven a better place, but Crowley believes it'll never happen, and heaven means to manipulate him). They truly would be the perfect team if they were in charge.

But the problem: that's not what Metatron or heaven intends. "Give me coffee or give me death" meant that if Aziraphale didn't accept the offer, he would've been destroyed. Metatron knew he'd accept, and based on the glare he gave Crowley, I don't think Crowley was ever really in his plan. Metatron will try to use Aziraphale and his power to end the world, and he has no idea he's a pawn. He fell for Metatron's apparent kindness and got swept away with the idea that he and Crowley wouldn't have to hide.

It's heartbreaking because I AM frustrated with Aziraphale, but I know why he chose heaven. There's trauma underlying his actions as well, and he didn't need MAGIC coffee (sorry, I'm mean about coffee theory) to fall hook, line, and sinker for what Metatron was selling. He loves Crowley so much, but if his plans to change heaven worked, he'd be saving the entire world from destruction.

People are still like "NO NO NO, how could he leave Crowley? He must've been hypnotized" when he is putting the WORLD first. That's not to say he won't regret it immediately, miss Crowley the entire time, or even change his mind, but it all happened so fast, and Crowley seemingly gave out on him. He refused, said "good luck", and started to leave. They didn't communicate with each other. I don't think Aziraphale was leaving him forever, but he thought "I HAVE to do this". Crowley is right, but Aziraphale can't see it another way.

Now he has to try his best to change heaven. In the end, he'll see the mistake he made and owe an apology to Crowley, but he has to figure it out on his own. After it's all said and done, it could be the last time they hold back from each other. Going through an angst arc of THIS magnitude would be worth it, and Neil Gaiman is a genius

[kotias]

We Are in Our Eden - Until Our Stars No Longer Shine

A little reprieve from the angst war @opscuritas

Fluff story written with @daneecastle

Word count: 1492 words

Crowley was out for the day, and had stopped by a cliff close to Aberdeen, with the grandest view to the ocean he could experience in the country. The wind was strong, almost pushing him away, and he laughed. What a view! The waves crashing against the rocks beneath him, the smell of iodine taking into his nostrils, and most of all, the view of the sun setting on the infinite horizon, spreading its yellows and reds and purples onto this side of the world. But it was only when he lifted his head and watched above that he noticed- He took his phone out of his pocket and called home. “Angel! Come here! Cruden Bay, the highest cliff you can find!" He knew he had an unexpected squeal in the middle of that call- well, it was guaranteed to give his angel some form of curiosity, at least. He looked up again, a bright smile on his face.

“Cruden Bay? But why? It's almost time to eat!" he heard over the phone, and didn’t say a word. Just the next second, he heard the familiar flutter of white wings behind him. “Crowley, what is it?”

He instantly caught his hand, dragged him a little further up, feeling like a teenage girl eager to spend time with her crush. He was jittery, smiling, squealing- "Look!" He pointed to the stars. Shooting stars in the sky, crossing the ozone layer, lighting up like fireworks. He could barely stay put, looking at them with the wonder of a child- and he knew it was an unreasonable reaction- he knew! But this was the first time he had the opportunity to watch them with Aziraphale. Pressing his fingers around the angel’s, he looked back at him, caught the adoration in his eyes, the immensity of his love for him, trapped behind those perfect eyes, changing with his emotions, and the slight blush he was showing. Crowley was over the moon- it mattered not whether the angel had really looked at what he was trying to show him. And the stars- the stars! So close to his reach! 

An idea came- he raised Aziraphale's hand and kissed it, before letting go of him and coming to the very edge of the cliff. Raising his left hand and snapping his fingers, he said "Here, boy!" And one of the shooting stars changed directions entirely, flinging in their direction and stopping right at his feet for him to collect two good pieces of it. He tapped it like a good dog and snapped his fingers again, leaving it to go back to its path. The rocks between his fingers were hot, almost crisp in his hand. And they smelled... so unique. He turned to Aziraphale again and showed them to him. "There's something I love about those shooting stars," he said, looking at the rocks like he would a child.

“What is it?” Aziraphale asked with a sweet, enamoured voice, never looking away from him. “I would love to know.”

He let out a small giggle. "It's a piece of Heaven, wrapped in the fires we find in Hell... falling on Earth. It feels like home. And also-" He turned to the shooting stars again. "My eyes aren't the best at seeing far. I miss a lot of the star lights that you describe to me. But the shooting stars? I can see them."

Aziraphale stepped closer to him, his deep blue eyes draping themselves in an emerald shroud. "Maybe…” He lightly touched his arms, caressing them with his thumbs. “Someday we could ask God to have your eyes changed back, so you could see the splendour of the world you helped create." He kissed Crowley's forehead. "I'm sure, after all you've done, She wouldn't mind."

Crowley shook his head slightly, losing his train of thought as Aziraphale’s slight sadness in his voice was gnawing at his euphoria. "Ah, yes, well- I think you'd miss the yellow in my eyes, wouldn't you?" 

"I would, I won't deny it, but-" He kissed him one, twice, and reverted back to his little star babies in his hand. "Here, hold this-" He handed him one of the two rocks and cradled the other between his two hands. "Let see if I can still-" His eyes lit up as he felt his power surge into it. "Yes!" When he uncovered it, it was glowing like a little sun, and he beamed at his angel, who couldn’t take his eyes from it, shining in unison with it. For a moment, he paused, only looking at him and how beautiful of a sight his amazement was, everytime he showed him something different from what he knew.

He cleared his throat. “Okay, now-" He held the little star up, pointing it to the darkening skies. “What do you want to be called, little one?" It was like an old music sheet had been rediscovered. The little star glowed, surrounded his hand in affection. He smiled. “Ah, I see. How about-" The little star extended to his forearm. “Oh!" He gave a glance at Aziraphale. “Naming it would mean giving it to the sky. I believe it doesn't want that, it's clutching onto me right now." He pulled his hand back to their levels as the angel chuckled. “Perfect little thing, why would you insist on staying with me?" he asked, like one would to a small child. 

“What wouldn't want to be with you?" he heard Aziraphale answer with a dreamy sigh, and he chortled.

“You’re barely objective, angel, we’ve known each other for-” A little power coursed from the star to his chest. “Oh-" Tenderly, he passed his fingers on the edges of the little thing. “Okay then- Angel, could you give me the second one? Thanks," he said as he received it, and kissed his nose. “Okay little star, do you want to help me, then?” He weighed the rock and the star; then, pressing the rock a little harder, he parted it in halves. The little star lightened excitedly. "Yes? That what you want?" He approached his two hands until they touched, and the little star crossed them to engulf the two new little rocks. He smiled and looked at Aziraphale. "It wants to stay with us, you see- so it's preparing a nest. I hope- I think you'll like the result."

The little star melted into the rocks, and the rocks melted into the star. Glowing brightly into Crowley's hands, they were exuding a homey warmth, and he let the three elements figure out what they wanted first, before guiding them gently into a form. For a second, his eyes darted to Aziraphale's hands, and he got back to work. They were shining so beautifully, he thought, as they let themselves be moulded by his attentions. After about a minute of working together, he blew on them, revealing two rings; one obsidian, textured like the meteorites coming from space and speckled with little twinkles all over it; the other perfectly white, gleaming like a happy little star, with a thin, tiny little black snake coursing its way all around it. He looked into his angel’s bright eyes, asking the question silently. Would you like me to put it on your finger? To make you mine for eternity? 

Aziraphale gasped as he watched the rings come into existence, shining like their very own little stars, tethered to the world that they had called their own. He felt stunned, overjoyed and excited, on the verge of tears as he realised what they were meant for, what Crowley had done to them, bearing the promise of their eternal loyalty to one another. For quite a long time, he was staring at the rings, far from Crowley’s expectant eyes, until he shook himself off; they knew, the both of them, and many years had passed since they had truly needed the words to express this intense sentiment they felt for one another, or the promise of an everliving love for one another. Yet, he gave a vocal answer. “Oh, you silly demon… Of course I would.”

His smile warmed him like a fireplace during the winter, his fingers wrapping around his hand made his heart flutter, and his kiss felt like a cloud.

The white ring slid perfectly on his finger, and he felt its otherworldly warmth on his skin, draping around him and offering just a bit of Crowley’s essence to mix into his own, his final oath in this union they were making for themselves.

The demon slid his own, dark ring on his finger, then passed his hand into Aziraphale’s hair and sealed their lips and their Vows together with a kiss. Together like they had been since the beginning, and never intending to part, they were an us, like God most certainly had intended.

[cassieno]

Just a little something about Crowley and Identity, Questions and Journeys. Full text for screenreaders below.

A Gentle Love - Crowley’s Inner Angel

Always an Optimist

Making nebulas, stars, galaxies, imagining gravity and light. He filled millions of pages with his thoughts and ideas. He had a creation.

He had passion. For his work, his future, and his identity. He’s a creator, a thinker, and with the way he looks at his accomplishments also an artist.  

He put the stars in the sky - a Starmaker. “I have worked on this since…well, always.” He did not just make the stars, he himself was made for this. So it is no surprise that at the end of the day, Crowley believes that the universe will look after him. An optimist at heart, even when his skies come crashing down.

Four Letter Words

Good, Nice, Kind, Care, Love

Four letter words to Crowley are words that betray his former identity, betray that he used to be an Angel. Something he doesn’t want to be anymore, or at the very least something he doesn’t want anyone to know he was. After the Rebellion, the War, and the Fall, Crowley knew that he wasn’t who he used to be. Maybe he tried to cling to what he knew, tried to find these distant joys somewhere inside himself. But in the end, and we don’t know when or why, maybe because of Hell’s restrictions, maybe because of a brooding bitterness towards Heaven, he left the Angel he was behind.

Lost, and with no home for the very first time in history, he believed, presumably, that Hell could provide him with new meaning. He had a new name, new clothes, new parts of himself that had scales and a forked tongue, and monstrous voices. He was given a new identity and a new purpose. But even so, the illusion of belonging hadn’t lasted long.

Humanity had been created and within the very first days of their existence, Crowley was confronted with a dilemma. He gave humanity free will, the ability to decide for themselves between good and evil. In Hell’s opinion, he might have done the right thing: Caused trouble. But he wondered, and oh, he never did stop to wonder, to question, if he might have done the good thing. Not the right thing, not the wrong thing: simply the good thing.

It was Crowley’s story repeated in front of his eyes: The awareness of white and black and grey, the consciousness to decide for themselves, led humans to be cast out of the only home they knew. And still, he thought that with this, he might have done the good thing. And it worries him, because Hell, a place he might have believed caught him after his Fall, wouldn’t like it any more than Heaven had liked his inquiries. He always had a mind of his own, a personal moral compass. And he would need to figure out how to follow it wisely.

Outside the walls of Eden, humanity flourished. And he witnessed how humans could disappoint him, but how they could help him, too. When Adam struck the lion to shield Eve, Crowley saw that there was something inside them that was ready to fight for what they loved and treasured. Humanity was on its own side, and he witnessed Heaven and Hell use them like dolls to settle their disputes. It was then that Crowley decided to be on his own side. To go along with Hell as far as he could. And he helped humanity, helped the innocent whenever he dared because maybe he wished that he had accepted the only helping hand that reached out to him in Heaven.

He witnessed the Flood, witnessed the bet about Job, the Crucifixion, the Wars, and the Apocalypse. He moved through it all, in his own ways, and helped from the shadows, stood by himself. And no matter if angel or demon, or nothing or both, one thing carried him to safety, one thing he kept close to his heart, and that was, that no matter what happened, the universe would always look after him.

Peaceful Existence

Crowley may not be the angel Aziraphale once knew, but there is no denying that it is still a part of him. A part he might want to hide away or ignore or forget, but it is there, and he tries to navigate it, tries to find closure. Who he was is as much a part of him as our childhoods are a part of who we are. We might not want to or even be able to remember the abuse, the tears and the heartache, the longing for something we were too young to name. We might try to detach ourselves from it but as we grow and navigate our past, maybe even as we have to move on without any closure, we may find ourselves longing for what little good moments we had.

Crowley might never want to forgive Heaven and God and Hell but maybe he will come to realize that he can feel misplaced, forgotten, and hurt, and still long for the times when things were different. Long for a distance past so far gone that it becomes harder and harder to remember. Maybe he can realize, that accepting the angel he once was, doesn’t mean that he must be happy or grateful for all the horrible and grotesque things that happened to him. He can take what he wants and use it to craft something new and beautiful, something that can grow and heal his inner angel. And he might find that from time to time he can let himself be an angel. He can let himself be all those four letter words, and he can be good without belonging to Heaven.

When he moved on from Heaven to Hell and then to our side, he had found something new. A special feeling of belonging, something he could plunge himself into and fill his identity with. Something peaceful and kind. But when fragile things break, they tend to have sharp edges. And now he is alone once more and by himself. Which proposes the scariest question he ever had to ask: Who is he, all by himself? Without Heaven and Hell and without Aziraphale, what is left of Crowley?

He might find that he is everything he lost before. Heaven, Hell, Aziraphale – all have shaped his identity, and all stay with him even as he finds himself on his own side once more. Crowley contains multitudes, like all of us, and he might never get answers to all his questions, he might never find out who he really is.

Unable to answer his own questions, there will only be more around the corner. But after all, since Crowley never punished anyone for asking questions, why should he punish himself? Maybe this time he doesn’t need answers. He’s an optimist and anyway, the universe will look after him.

After all of us.

[bloodashre]

Crowley stared at the humans across from him. "I say what I'm thinking all the time."

"Really? So you've told Mr. Fell you're in love with him then?"

He sat up straight, something he rarely did. "What are you talking about?"

"You and Mr. Fell. You're clearly in love with each other."

"What?"

The two women exchanged a look.

"You're not gonna make this easy, are you?" Nina sighed. "We know you're not human. Last night made that pretty obvious."

"But somehow you've developed human feelings anyway. And apparently it's not impossible given that - uh - the two - what were their names? Jim and the other one?"

"Beezlebub? What do they have to do with anything?"

"Well, I mean, they were the same as you two, right, an -an angel and a demon? And they fell in love."

Crowley crossed his arms. "Yeah, but that's not - I mean, they - look. Aziraphale doesn't love me, ok? He can't. He'd never allow himself to fall for a demon, even if he were going to fall for someone."

Nina looked him firmly in the eyes. "We don't choose who we love. And I don't hear you denying that you're in love with him, anyway," she added.

"I - Well I'm not even sure I know what - how - well how do you even know?"

Maggie smiled. "There are questions you need to ask. You don't have to tell us the answers. But you need to answer them for yourself. And then, you'll know."

Crowley hesitated. "O-o-ok. What are they?"

"For starters, do you ever think about what it might be like to kiss him?"

Crowley raised his brows. "No."

"Or do things for him that could possibly destroy you? Do you put yourself at risk or in danger - "

"That's out of context."

"You don't have to answer us. These aren't for us. They're for you." Crowley fell silent.

"Is he your favourite person? If you could do anything, would you do it with him?"

"Do you dream about spending eternity with him?"

Each question hit him harder than the last.

"Where do you feel safest?"

Crowley swallowed. "I -" His heart started racing. He did love him. He had loved him for centuries. He had tried to pretend he didn't. Demons weren't supposed to fall in love. He looked at the spot where Beezlebub and Gabriel had stood and declared they loved each other. And he knew instantly that that was what he wanted more than anything.

"What -" Crowley cleared his throat. This was so hard. Tears began to well just behind his sunglasses. "What if he -"

"Doesn't love you back? You won't know unless you try."

"Besides, have you seen the way he looks at you? He's positively smitten." Nina interjected.

"I - are you sure? Because -"

"She's certain. I'm not sure if he knows it, but it's definitely there."

Crowley fell back in his chair. He had no idea what to do with information.

"Well, we should really get back. But best of luck." Nina stood and Maggie followed suit. "Good luck," she smiled. "Yeah, uh, thanks." Crowley stood, adrenaline and nerves pumping hard. But they were right.

He had to say something.

[of-apollo]

heya!! hruuu i saw that youre writting for two of my favourite shows wwdits & good omens which is amazing!! but anywho i was wondering if u could write a platonic fic with child!reader x good omens?

where in the fic the reader takes place as the child of an american diplomat?? ( I FORGOT HIS NAME IM SORRY ) but yeah just the dynamic of nanny crowley raising you and the gardener with the silly teeth teaching u to be good i think that could be a cute fic! even tho the reader is not the antichrist in the end they still cherished the moments they all had together

ofc if u choose to ignore this its totally fine!! have a good day!

Aziraphale and Crowley x Child!Reader - Being raised by the Gardener and the Nanny HC’s

Warnings: Nothing, but one mention of killing a spider.

A/N: Love this idea! Gone for HC’s as I feel they fit the request better. This is the first time I’ve actually written for Good Omens, so I hope it’s not too OOC! Enjoy!

It is very important to note that above all else, even above their little scheme, Aziraphale and Crowley truly do care about you.

They found it quite amusing that when they were employed by your parents, Aziraphale was the one they were slightly suspicious of.

It had never happened before, because he was an angel above all else, so everyone trusted him. Crowley pinned it down to his stupidly goofy appearance.

But, when your parents saw you toddling after the gardener whenever he was at work, he quickly began to grow on them.

Aziraphale is definitely more of a positive influence in your life. The second you start following him around the garden, he lectures you about being kind to plants and animals.

He would quietly miracle a squirrel or a butterfly to brighten your day, and he would take time to learn some real gardening skills to teach you.

You begin to love the garden, and it ends up being the place you go whenever you’re down. You don’t even question why the gardener seems to constantly be there.

When you start getting homework, when you start experiencing the drama of friendship and relationships, the gardener is always there when your parents can’t be.

I think while Aziraphale would take care of you, making concoctions when you’re sick and giving you kind words when you’re sad, he’d definitely teach you the fine art of self-care as well.

While Aziraphale is dedicated, he technically can’t always be there, even if he mostly is. He makes sure you know how to take a breather, make a perfect cup of tea, and choose the perfect book to cozy up with depending on what’s got you down that day.

Crowley on the other hand…

It’s not that he wants you to be absolutely devious, but it is kind of his job to at least guide you vaguely in that direction.

While Aziraphale teaches you how to gently scoop up a spider and drop it outside, Crowley is the first to crush one when he sees it.

I think that you’d definitely take more to Aziraphale than Crowley with him being a friendly gardener rather than a nasty, strict nanny.

Crowley would be very strict on things like homework and chores. Even if he didn’t really care for them himself, he knew they got on your nerves.

So, he’d nag you about them relentlessly. Initially, you obliged, because you were young and scared of your nanny. But, as you grew up, you rebelled, ignoring him until you could get the gardener’s help to complete tasks.

Aziraphale and Crowley definitely argued a lot over this, because Aziraphale why are you helping the evil Antichrist?

Even though Crowley constantly told Aziraphale that he was too soft on you, he certainly had his moments.

Whenever you fell, Crowley would always be there to miracle away whatever scrape you’d gotten before you’d even notice.

While Aziraphale could deal with your emotional pain, Crowley could only deal with the physical. And he was committed to that, even if Aziraphale constantly told him that scrapes did not need a miracle, just a plaster.

When you grow up and they realise you are in fact not the Antichrist, they feel incredibly silly.

But, when they look at you and see parts of themselves, like a love for gardening and a kindness to yourself from Aziraphale, and a sharp wit from Crowley, they feel like they haven’t wasted a single second. It was all worth it for you.

Assuming (or praying at this rate) that there are calmer years for them beyond the future of the show, they would for sure keep in touch with you.

They drop off a bit in your teen years, half because of their own issues, but half to let you live your life without their influences.

But, they definitely make up for lost time eventually, and you become one of their most treasured humans over all of the years they’ve existed.

[rel312]

I HAD NO IDEA SEASON 2 CAME OUT ALREADY SO NOW IM GOING TO SCREAM ABOUT IT

Episode 1:

CROWLEY WANTED TO TAKE AZIRAPHALE BACK TO THE PLACE THEY FIRST MET

CROWLEY PROTECTED AZIRAPHALE FIRST IM SCREAMING

(My brother actually came into my room to tell me to shut up)

Of course Aziraphale would just forgive 8 months rent

Lmao Gabriel’s just walking down the street ass naked

Gabriel just hugged Aziraphale I can’t

“James. Long for Jim, short for Gabriel”

Crowley knows Aziraphale so well, but poor guy he only calls him for 3 reasons

Poor Crowley is trying so hard not to freak out about the “naked man friend”

The conversation between Crowley and Jim I can’t

Maggie and Nina are trapped together!!

Michael and Uriel are fighting let’s gooo

Crowley just casually let the girls out lmao

THERES AN I WAS WRONG DANCE OH MY GOD

THEYRE PERFORMING A MIRACLE TOGETHER

Aaaaaand of course it goes immediately wrong

Episode 2:

Gabriel’s wig is atrocious

IS AZIRAPHALE GOING TO BE THE SUPREME ARCHANGEL NOW

A jukebox that turns every song into Everyday like the Bentley with Queen, hmmm….

Crowley looks like a doting partner bringing his husband a drink

“Get humans wet and staring into each other’s eyes, vavoom, sorted” sir… are you telling me that’s what did it for you???

Crowley’s so confounded that Jane Austen wrote books

THE VOICE OF GOD???

HE TURNED ALL THE GOATS INTO BIRDS

Crowley scaring the kids cause they were brats but not actually killing them aww

The little girl asking to be a blue lizard with her siblings she’s so cute

CROWLEY TAUGHT AZIRAPHALE TO EAT

I cannot believe Aziraphale was the first to talk about sides I love them

Crowley and Aziraphale working together for the first time to save the kids

Aziraphale looks so shaken to have lied poor baby

Crowley babe he’s begging for you to drive him

“Our car” you can’t take it that far lol

Poor Aziraphale really thought he was gonna fall he was about to cry

Crowley was so soft in that last scene

Episode 3:

Jim’s stuff is all labeled

Aziraphale looks like a proud father to Muriel

Crowley’s moving the plants to use the car

They both look like parents I love them

Crowley brought Aziraphale to a cemetery because he thought it would amuse him, that is date behavior

Crowley is about to kill Aziraphale for changing his car

NESSIE?!?!

“Operation: Lovebirds” Crowley is such a dork

Aziraphale just is not getting anything lol

Crowley… shrunk himself??? And then grew himself????

Crowley tempted her to be good I love him

I love the very closed sign

Demons can’t enter somewhere uninvited???

He’s so angry Aziraphale might be hurt

Episode 4:

BEEBOP

“His type”????

“I remember hearing that you and Crowley were an item” HOLY SHIT

HE CALLED CROWLEY HIS GOOD FRIEND AFTER THE CHURCH!!!

“This office has gone 13 5 0 days without anyone saying ‘THE ROAD TO HELL IS PAVED’”

Glad to see Aziraphale in his magic era

Crowley’s impression is hilarious

“Someone you can really trust” and his first thought is Crowley 🥹

Aziraphale has a gun and Crowley has never shot one

Crowley was shaking he was so scared and Aziraphale was so proud of his trick

Furfur not knowing how to pronounce Aziraphale lmao

Sleight of hand!

Look at them finding a middle ground in shades of grey!

Lmao Crowley would murder him if he knew Aziraphale didn’t put the brakes

Episode 5:

They’re talking about Doctor Who

Aziraphale’s giving books and Crowley’s playing with crystal balls, I love them

Aziraphale being bad at French is so funny to me

Nina grilling Crowley on his relationship with Aziraphale is everything

Crowley was confronted with his feelings and immediately went out to get a drink with Aziraphale

Crowley’s so mad go off king

The matchbox!

Aww look at Crowley denying he’s nice

The romantic music while Crowley looks at Aziraphale with the chandelier

Oh. My. GOD. Jim’s suit!

Lol that’s not what I was expecting when they said masks will be provided

AZIRAPHALE WANTS TO DANCE WITH CROWLEY

THEYRE DANCING!!!!!!

“Surrender the angle”

Gabriel’s coat!!

“T. O. S. T. E.”

“You’re a good lad” “not actually, either”

“Rescuing me makes him so happy” you can’t just say things like that and expect me to be normal about it

Episode 6:

Crowley’s just bouncing around in heaven

“I’m done with being scared” *flips them the bird*

Oh sweetie, you meant well but no

“Crowley’s emotional support angel” yes, yes that’s exactly what he is

Crowley’s little supportive punch to Muriel was so cute

AZIRAPHALES HALO?!?!

THE FLY

Gabriel x Beelzebub confirmed??

The fact that Gabriel and Beelzebub were able to sort this out in a few years while it’s taken Crowley and Aziraphale 6000 is insane

And the fact that Aziraphale grabbed Crowley’s arm when he realized that

Crowley’s so impressed with Aziraphale bringing everyone to order

Aziraphale’s face at Crowley talking about Alpha Centauri

Aziraphale looking at Crowley with so much love in his eyes is giving me life

THE METATRON?!?!

Aziraphale looking to Crowley for permission I can’t

Crowley knowing Aziraphale will come back and saying they need “a little us time” at the Ritz

Crowley getting antsy that Aziraphale’s not back yet

Nina taking inspiration from Crowley and calling Maggie angel my beloved

Crowley looks devastated that Aziraphale interrupted him

Aziraphale looks so incredibly happy at getting Crowley to be an angel again but there’s no way Crowley wants that

Crowley’s getting so emotional

“Just be an us” stooooopppppp

“I need you” I can’t take this!

Nightingales

THEY KISSED!!!!!!!!!

Aziraphale touched his lips after I’m dying

Aziraphale stop being so stupid and get him back

The- the second coming??

YOU CANNOT END IT HERE

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

Please tell me there will be a season 3 I can’t handle this

[jophiel-extras]

Hi, can you do an aziraphale x reader one, where reader is oblivious that aziraphale has developed feelings for them and he tries signaling it to them but after a while he just gives up and blurts it out? 🩵

summary :: Aziraphale has being trying to catch your eye for some time and eventually becomes fed up with your head being in the heavens

warning :: none, fluff

note :: I never expected to get three Aziraphale requests in a row, I thought it would’ve been Crowley city in my inbox

Aziraphale has been on earth long enough to know how to ‘court’ another person.

Despite being socially… off to human standards, he can be quite smooth.

He has been quite smooth, a few times. To you specifically although you never seem to take the hint. Aziraphale finds it “dreadfully cute,” but it’s quite comedic at this point.

The first time Aziraphale attempted to be romantic towards you, was buying you a bouquet of lovely flowers. They were the prettiest Cala Lillies you’d ever seen.

“Oh Aziraphale, they’re lovely,” You glossed a finger over the rounded petal of a singe Lilly, then returned your eyes to Aziraphale, “what are they for?”

“Well erm, they’re for you, dear.” Aziraphale stuttered.

“Yes but what for?”

You couldn’t quite grasp the idea that Aziraphale had gotten you flowers for no reason other than he simply liked you.

Aziraphale would ask you out for dates (which you considered friendly hang-outs) and always paid the bill. Which you usually protested.

Never left a door unopened for you.

He would lend you his coat if ever the weather called for it. No other had gotten that kind of special treatment. He prized his coat, after all.

Always threading compliments into your conversations.

“You look marvellous.” Or “What a lovely outfit.” Even “You’re glowing this evening.” And “I enjoy your company so much.”

All met with a chipper; “Awh, thanks Aziraphale!”

He’s a big gift giver too, he loves to drown you in presents.

Even if you merely mention liking something in a shop window, it’ll end up in your home one way or another.

Often, for gift giving holidays like Christmas or your birthday, Aziraphale will have a minimum of five presents waiting for you.

No matter the amount Aziraphale spoils you, it never seems to click.

At this point, Crowley had caught on and began teasing him.

Crowley’s teasing ruffled his feathers, quite a lot, causing the Angel to become ever so slightly frustrated with your ignorance.

“You know it’s never going to work, not with a human so dumb.” Crowley muttered.

“Don’t be rude.” Aziraphale defended.

“In fact, I think it’s such a lost cause that I might even pray for you.”

Crowley, praying for him?

That’s when the frustration got to the better of him and with a huff, Aziraphale made his way to your whereabouts for a serious confession.

It took Aziraphale a year or two of pining before an outright confession.

If patience were a person, it would’ve been Aziraphale! But something had bugged him so sorely about your airiness towards his feelings that he had lost sleep about it.

And when Crowley had a go at the sleepless, pining Aziraphale things had suddenly changed.

“I fancy you! No, I love you,” he had quickly changed his words, ‘fancy’ giving you too much room for a miscommunication, “very dearly, and I have for some time.” At this point, Aziraphale had begun fidgeting, he’d never been so forthright before.

“Love me?” You parroted.

“Yes! Romantically, very romantically.” He hurriedly specified.

“Oh Aziraphale, I never knew you felt that way.”

God bless you. How could you be so oblivious?

[newtthetranswriter]

'Ello, 'ello, 'ello! I just saw your post about making GO2 x readers. I was wondering if you can make an Aziraphale x reader? The reader is a rank lower than Aziraphale, but more chaotic when they got on earth. Reader's a freaking simp to Aziraphale and tells everything they like about him to Crowley.

Bonus if Crowley literally yeets the reader to Aziraphale for swooning too much.

Word count: 1335

Paring: Aziraphale x reader

A/n: Thank you for requesting I hope you enjoy it. It was nice dipping into the Good Omens fandom for writing. Requests are currently open, just make sure to check my rules and character list before requesting thanks, and enjoy. Also very small season 2 spoilers so read at your own discretion. MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT

  Having been on earth for the past 6000 years has been wild. I have witnessed and maybe participated in multiple wars, seen the rise and fall of empires, but the best thing I have witnessed on earth is my fellow angel, Aziraphale. I just love his fascination with books, and the workings of human society. The fact that he even is so kind as to help the demon Crowley with tasks that they both happen to be assigned to is amazing, he is such a kind individual and needs to be protected.

   Over the years I have noticed that whenever I’m around him my brain goes fuzzy, like it becomes impossible to think of anything other than him. I have no idea how to tell him this, I mean it’s not like he would feel the same about me. After all that we have been through together I think it’s best if i just keep these feelings to myself, as I don’t want to jeopardize our friendship.

    Well keeping it to myself is far easier said than done as I was currently pestering my favorite fallen angel, and some things may have slipped out.

    “I don’t know when I started feeling this way, I just think he’s so sweet. And the look on his face when he thought his books were destroyed in that church back in ww2, he was so sad and then he realized you saved them he was so happy. I love how he takes care of his books like they are the most important things in this world.” I said, talking the demon's ear off as he just rolled his eyes at me.

    He just continued to sit on the park bench while we were waiting for Aziraphale, watching me pass in front of him. “Why are you telling me this, I don’t care.” He said hoping I would just sit down and shut up.

    I just rolled my eyes and continued knowing it would probably still be a few minutes before the angle showed up. “I just wish I knew what he was thinking in that pretty little brain of his.” I sighed as I sat next to Crowley. “Who am I kidding, he would never like me like that. I’m one misstep from being a demon, he’s so straight laced while I like to cause trouble. He wouldn’t even look my way if we weren’t both angels.” I said exasperated.

  The demon next to me just sighed before hoping the other angel would show up already. “Just because you are more of a morally gray angel doesn't mean he wouldn’t look at you. I mean look at me, I’m a demon and he talks to me.” Crowley said, jestering to himself. “ And trust me he does like you, talks about you whenever you aren’t around.” He said, trying to cheer me up.

   “Yeah right, there is no way Aziraphale, the perfect angel who runs a book shop that is really just a cover for his hoarding problem,  would like me. But it’s whatever, I've resigned myself to watching from afar. I’m fine watching him light up every time he finds a rare book, or finds a new food he likes.” I said in a dreamy voice. “Anyway I’m done talking about it, he should be here soon.”

    Just as I finished the sentence, said angel walked up to us. We both greeted him before checking in on whether any of us have heard from hell or heaven recently, thankfully not. After about ten minutes of quick catch up, Aziraphale stood up and turned to us. “Would either of you care to join me for lunch?” He asked with a bright smile.

   I was about to decline when Crowley spoke up with a wicked smirk. “Oh I’m not in the mood to eat right now but our dear Y/n would gladly join you.” He then pushed me off the bench towards the angel ignoring my glare.

   “Well then, shall be off than Y/n.” Aziraphale said as he reached for my hand. I hesitantly accepted it, not missing the thumbs up Crowley shot my way as me and the angel walked away. 

   As we approached the small dinner we had picked for lunch Aziraphale took notice of me being more quiet than usual. “Is everything alright? You’ve been oddly quiet.” I could hear the concern in his voice as we took our sets.

   I gave him a small smile before responding,”Everything is fine just feeling a little under the weather I guess.” I said hoping he would accept the answer and leave it at that.

   “Oh, are you sure you are up to getting food then, we could go back to the bookshop and I could make you a nice cup of tea?” The angel asked, making my heart swell and blush rush to my checks. “You do look a bit warm.”

   I silently cursed myself of course he would notice me blushing. I tried to think of an excuse. “I’m fine really, it’s just a little warm. Let’s just order.” I watched as he let out a sigh before waving down the waitress and placed our order. I relaxed slightly hoping he finally let it go.

   After about thirty minutes, we had finished eating and were now walking back to Aziraphale’s bookshop. It was an awkward silence, I could tell he wanted to ask me about something but I wasn’t sure what. As we turned a corner on to a less crowded street he stopped suddenly, I turned and looked at him confused. We were only a couple blocks from the bookshop, why did he stop all of a sudden.

   “You’re hiding something from me.” He said out of nowhere, his tone wasn’t angry but more concerned. “I heard you talking with Crowley before. I didn’t hear everything but I could tell it was something about me because you ended the conversation saying ‘he should be here soon.’. And I don’t want to over step but if there is something you need to tell me please just tell me, I promise to listen. I’m really good at Listening.” I could tell he was worried that it was something bad.

   I froze for a second before walking up to him. “It’s nothing bad, I just don’t know how to tell you this.” I said, looking away slightly. “Look, you don’t have to respond now or ever actually, but I like you, a lot. And I know you probably don’t feel the same but I just needed to get it off my chest. I love how much you love books, and helping people.” I finally got the words off my chest hoping to at least still have one of my best friends.

   There was a pause before he smiled at me and grabbed my hands. “How could I possibly not feel the same way? Yes you tend to go about things in a less than angelic way but that’s part of what makes you so amazing. I love that about you, I love that I can talk to you about my rare books and you will listen, I love that you get along with Crowley cause let’s be honest he’s not the easiest to talk with. It’s amazing to have you here. So I do feel the same, and never be scared to tell me your feelings. I am here to listen.”

    I just looked at him in shock. Crowley was right, Aziraphale does feel the same. I was at a loss for words but I settled on giving him the biggest smile I could before pulling him in for a hug. As I pulled from the hug, he placed a hand on my cheek and smiled. I knew that whatever came next, we would have each other's back. Little did I know that what came next was a very naked Gabriel who had no clue who he was or why he was here. This was gonna be fun.

[snek-eyes]

Ineffable Husbands eras

So I named the first section of history the Pre-Arrangement era, which of course led me thinking to how I would divide up the rest. This is of course just how I interpret the vibes, I'd love to hear thoughts!

Pre-Arrangement (4004 BC ~ 41 AD)

Getting to know each other—and themselves. They're both learning and growing in this brand new world, and they test each other out whenever the job brings them to the same place (There isn't a whole lot of place else yet to be). During this time they learn that they can not only trust each other, but the era ends with them realizing they actively enjoy each other's company. They have much more in common with each other than their respective sides.

4004 BC - Eden (Meeting. Surprising each other)

3004 BC - Mesopotamia (The flood. Aziraphale disappoints Crowley by sticking to Heaven's line.)

2500 BC - Uz (Job. Crowley tries to get Aziraphale to disappoint him again, but instead the angel puts his faith in the demon. Their Own Side is formed way back here.)

33 AD - Golgotha (Crucifixion. Crowley tests Aziraphale again, the angel passes and Crowley opens up about his name change)

41 AD - Rome (Oysters. Aziraphale is the one to reach out this time, and doesn't shy away from being unangelic.)

Formation of the Arrangement (537 ~ 1601)

Let's do this on purpose (for Strictly Business reasons). What defines this era is that Aziraphale is nervous and Crowley thinks they've got it made. Even well after they've agreed to working together, they're still doing the song and dance of Aziraphale pretending he doesn't know what's happening and Crowley seducing him into it.

537 AD - Kingdom of Wessex (Knights. Still running into each other by accident, Crowley proposes a more radical version of what will be the final agreement)

[1020ish - when the book says they reached the Arrangement]

1601 - Globe Theatre, London (Hamlet. They've switched jobs "dozens of times" by now, presumably that's at least 24 occasions but less than 100.)

And now I've gone and done math about it, so...

if the start date is also accurate for the show... by the 1600s they're meeting up at least once every 25 years on average.

(and that's for the minimum of 24 Arrangements)

In my unlikely scenario of them having 99 Arrangements already, that would bring it down to 5 years

Even if for some unlikely reason Aziraphale changed his mind and went back right away in 537, 24 Arrangements would have them meeting up on average every 44 years

Of course, these are exact averages and they aren't robots. It's likely meetings started out less often and increased in frequency as they got more comfortable. Maybe it was every 100 years in the beginning, who knows exactly! (only one man and he's not talking) Do with this information what you will. Let's move on.

Definitely Not Friends (1793 ~ 1862)

Let's do this on purpose (for personal reasons). No longer are they only arranging to meet up in-between going to each others' jobs so the other can stay home, this is going out of their way to spend time together.

During this era, Aziraphale has finally started to relax, while Crowley is doing the opposite. Turns out (in classic Crowley form) this might not have been as good an idea as he originally thought, but he's in way too deep now. The era ends when Crowley shatters Aziraphale's growing comfort.

1793 - Paris (Revolution. It's plausible that Aziraphale may have arranged this on purpose, to see Crowley without admitting that's what he wants. For his part, Crowley goes out of his way to stage a rescue, even though he's now able to admit it could get him in real trouble.)

1800 - London (Bookshop opening [from the script book, semi-canonical]. In Paris, Crowley knew Aziraphale was planning to open a bookshop, now he knows the exact date and is swinging by to bring him presents. Also sneakily puts a stop to the other angels recalling Aziraphale from Earth; just as he knew Aziraphale wouldn't like hell, he knows he wouldn't like going back to heaven either.)

1827 - Edinburgh (Grave robbing. Crowley invites Aziraphale to hang out in a graveyard in the middle of the night in what is totally not an old-timey date. The only pretense is a personal excuse ['hey angel come see this statue of your boss lmao']. This is just straight up spending time together.) Interestingly, this is also the last time we will really see them traveling together, everything from here on out is around London.

1862 - St. James Park (Holy water requested, denied. This meeting is oddly formal for all that came before it, even back in S1 when it followed right after the Paris rescue. Crowley is seriously rattled. The Holy Water request is a declaration that he would take on hell for them. Aziraphale doesn't understand and isn't ready to hear it even if he did.)

We Both Know that We Both Know (1941 ~ 1967)

We are dangerously aware of what's going on here. It is made very clear that they will both go to insane lengths to ensure the other will stay in their life. They still can't say it out loud, but the remaining pretense is tissue paper thin.

1941 - London (The Blitz. It's been 80 years since they've seen each other, and yet Crowley saunters back in right at the moment Aziraphale needs him. They spend a giddy night being ridiculous together, only to get the wake up call of their closest call yet from head office. It's the night of Aziraphale's two realizations: That they're in love, and the full weight of the danger that puts them in.)

1967 - Soho (Holy Water given. Aziraphale isn't happy about it, but he makes the decision to trust Crowley in hopes being on the same team will keep him safer than he'd be otherwise. It's the complete opposite of the decision he made to walk away 105 years ago. He also gives them both a slim glimpse of hope for the future.)

A Test of Faith (2008 ~ 2019)

Whose side are we on? 6000 years of becoming more and more of Earth while pretending that's not what they're doing, and it's finally time to either admit that or don't. Still not quite ready to admit that choosing "the world" also means each other, but they do choose their own side.

2008 - Baby antichrist delivered (Present day dates aren't outright stated, this is technically "11 years ago")

2019 - Apocawasn't (date from when S1 aired)

What Are We [Limbo] (2020 ~ 2023)

Finally free (what are we waiting for?). Stuck in a holding pattern, neither of them know how to move forward. All the coping mechanisms they've developed and sunk into over millennia are breaking down. Crowley is more stressed than ever waiting for the other shoe to fall, Aziraphale doesn't know who he is without the structure of heaven. Something needs to shake things up, and when it comes it shakes them apart.

2020 - Lockdown short (Semi-canonical. The excuse to hole up together is right there and they both clearly want it! But neither of them knows how to take that step.)

2023 - Gabriel disappears from heaven and chaos ensues (season 2 airdate)

As for what's next, I'm guessing something like:

Divorce Era (Figuring out who they are and what matters to them without the other for the first time. Throwback to the pre-Arrangement)

What Are We [Redux] (allied again, but the plot is giving us a convenient excuse to not address things between us. This is 'We Both Know' and 'Limbo' combined)

Ineffable Husbands time (when they've finally finally gotten it all out on the table. They are going to be insufferable.)

And those are my thoughts! Let me know what you think :)

[creelkobblelaufeyson69]

Hi

Some crowley x virgin or pregnant reader plssssssss

Loads of love

Need help

Warnings: fluff, talks of toxic relationships, and talks of smut

Y/n had just gotten out of a toxic relationship, but was pregnant with the man’s child. She wanted kids, but not kids with him. One of the ways they’d makeup was having sex. He had decided to not wear a condom that night, even though she wanted him too

He had never listened to her, and getting out of the relationship was difficult for her. She hated herself for not being stronger, and not talking about it with someone sooner. The first person she told was her best friend Crowley. She could’ve sworn a lot of times her ex almost died because of Crowley, but than Crowley reminds her that he too is just a human (a lie, but we knew that already)

She had yet told him about her pregnancy, since she didn’t know how’d he react even if he was supper supportive with everything going on in her hell life. He’d do something crazy probably if she told him how it happened. She didn’t want her ex to be hurt- well actually that’s a lie, since there’s been many times when she wanted him dead

But to her that would make her on his level, and so she’ll keep her cool to not end up in jail like how he is currently. Y/n was currently standing in front of the bookshop as it rained. She was scared, but she let’s herself in. “Oh, hello Y/n! Crowley is upstairs right now” Aziraphale says with a warm smile on his face

“Okay” she now thought about telling Aziraphale first instead of Crowley. The angel and demon would be the first two to know, and she honestly wants to keep it that way. Aziraphale notices her anxious look on her face, which makes him ask if everything is alright

She’d feel awful for lying to him, especially cause Aziraphle was also such a great friend. She begins to sob, which makes the angel rush up to her and hug her. “Well everything is clearly not alright. Did he contact you?” He asked referring to him. “N-No” she stuttered out

“Than what happened?” After Aziraphale asked that, it was as if Crowley had spawned out of the blue, since he asked what was wrong with a worried expression on his face. “I’m pregnant” she cries out, which makes Aziraphale stop hugging her

She darts over to hug Crowley now. He returns the hug once he had taken his glasses off. She sobs into his chest as he rubs her back. “Did you just find out?” Aziraphale asked out of curiosity, but Crowley instantly snaps at him for bringing it up more

Aziraphale apologized since he did realize quickly that she was clearly not in the mood to speak about him. “I’ll help you out. I will make sure that man never knows that you had his child” Crowley says, which makes Aziraphale’s eyes go wide. “Crowley, are you sure that’s a good idea?” Crowley looks at the angel and nods his head

Two months in, and Y/n and Crowley started to date. It was a lot healthier than her past relationship, and she was happy and safer with him. She was currently in her flat with a book in hands. She was cuddling with him as he dozed off into his own world

His hand on her stomach as he was dozed off. “Crowley, have you’ve ever thought of what the gender could possibly be?” She asked him, which caught his attention. “Not at all. I just know we’re not gonna give the child the stereotypical stuff that is only for boys and girls” he explained, which makes her smile

[mimisempai]

I love the angel you chose to be

Summary

Crowley overhears a conversation between Aziraphale and Muriel, and realizes that words spoken millennia ago can linger in the mind for a long time, even if the person who spoke them has forgotten them. It's time for him to help his angel forget them.

Notes

We all love Aziraphale Curly and messy blond hair…

Day 2 : Playing with hair

On Ao3

Rating G -  1452 words

Crowley entered the bookstore, coffee and hot chocolate in hand holding a couple of Eccles cakes wrapped by Nina under his arm, but he saw no one. 

He was about to call out when he heard voices that sounded like they were coming from the back of the bookshop. 

He was on his way there when he heard Muriel's voice as they asked, "Aziraphale, I heard Maggie and Nina talking about something, and I was wondering, is it deliberate that the front of the bookshop is the same shade as Crowley's hair?"

Crowley paused, now curious to hear the angel's answer.

Aziraphale coughed and Crowley would have given anything to see his expression at that moment, but he couldn't without revealing his presence and he was eager to hear the angel's answer.

"Well, at first it was just a coincidence, I thought the old-fashioned red and gold gave the place a distinguished look, and then it's true that over time I also liked the idea that looking at it reminded me of his hair."

Muriel said in a slightly teasing voice, "I've seen you with your hand in Crowley's hair often enough to know that you like his hair, you know."

Crowley stifled a small gasp, thinking that Aziraphale probably had the same blush on his cheeks as he did. That nosy little bee!

"Well... you see this hair, it's kind of special, you know. It's not really red, it's an infinite shade of red. In the evening, his red hair takes on the softest sheen, and in the starlight, the red becomes intense, like the reddest of Burgundy wines, but my favorite shade is in the morning, when the rising sun reflects off it and gives it an incandescent glow."

Okay, no doubt Crowley's cheeks were now as scarlet as his hair.

"I see, I see," Muriel replied, "but how would you describe your own hair?"

Aziraphale immediately replied, "Light blonde. There's nothing special about it."

Muriel asked in a genuinely curious tone, "Do you think Crowley has the same fascination with your hair as you do with his?"

Crowley didn't like the angel's dismissive chuckle at all before replying, "Not at all. You know, I think Crowley even finds my curls funny."

"Oh, how do you know?"

Aziraphale replied, "I have known for thousands of years. Right after we saved Job's children."

Aziraphale turned to the demon and said, "I'm ready to go. 

Crawley looked at him in surprise and asked, "Go where?"

"To Hell."

The demon immediately replied, "I'm not taking you to Hell, Angel."

"Why not?"

"Well, I don't think you'd like it." 

Aziraphale protested, "But you have to. I'm like you now. A demon." 

Crawley began to smile and said in a distinctly mocking tone, "Sorry. You think you're a demon? With your curly little... and your neat white..."

The angel finished his story, "You see, Muriel, I don't think he sees anything fascinating in my curly little... I don't know what he would have called it, but given his sneering expression, it wouldn't have been very flattering."

He heard the angel clap his hands as he continued, "Come on Muriel, let's finish putting away these new books and then we've earned a little break. I think Crowley even went to get us some snacks."

Despite the angel's attempt to sound enthusiastic, Crowley knew him well enough to detect the small nuance of despondency beneath the cheerful tone.

He hadn't meant any harm at the time, of course, but knowing Aziraphale as he did now, knowing the damage Heaven had done to his self-esteem, those words had naturally left a mark on Aziraphale.

His dear angel, always so insecure when it came to himself.

The demon tiptoed back, careful not to be noticed, and silently left the shop before reentering, this time with a bang.

"Aziraphale! Muriel! I'm home! It's break time for those who pretend to work."

The two angels appeared from behind the shelves, and Crowley chuckled as they both snapped at him, offended by his earlier statement.

As he handed out drinks and cakes, Aziraphale stepped up to the window, just under a ray of sunlight that illuminated him, forming a halo around his head.

Crowley smiled softly.

His hair funny?

Nonsense. 

Crowley was going to show him.

********

A little later in the evening, they were both sitting on the sofa, one against the other. Aziraphale was reading aloud and Crowley commented from time to time.

Suddenly, Aziraphale stopped reading and asked him softly, "Crowley, my dear, won't you lie down and put your head in my lap?"

Crowley smiled softly, secretly glad to have the opportunity he had been looking for, then shook his head, "No, Angel, tonight I'd like to change."

Aziaphale turned his head to him and asked, confused, "Change what?" 

Crowley took the book from his hands and placed it beside him, then patted his own lap and said softly, "Tonight, you're the one who's going to lie down and put your head on my lap."

He put his arm around the shoulders of Aziraphale, who still looked a little confused, and pulled him close to lie down.

The angel relented, but Crowley could tell by the look on his face that he didn't quite understand. He could understand, after all, it was the first time they'd reversed positions like this.

When he was sure the Angel was settled, he bent down and planted a light kiss on his temple before whispering in his ear, "Angel, I overheard your conversation with Muriel about my hair and especially yours. I can't let you continue to think that I find your hair ridiculous or funny or whatever silly idea my clumsy words might have put into your head."

The demon straightened, placed his hands on the angel's hair, and stroked it gently.

"When I spoke of your hair that day, it was because it had nothing in common with the hair of someone you'd think belonged in hell. Granted, you wouldn't fit in. But there's nothing ridiculous about those blond curls, Angel."

He buried his fingers a little deeper in the light curls and continued, "If you only knew how many times I've imagined running my hands through this hair. Long before I had the right, like now. I was dying to know if it was as soft as it looked."

The demon buried his fingers a little deeper into the angel's hair, smiling with satisfaction as he felt the angel lean his head into his fingers.

He continued, "You know, your hair is so you. Comfortable, soft, a little messy, but still well cared for. I love it, Angel. And never once have I found it ridiculous. Never once have I found anything about you ridiculous."

He grabbed his chin and turned his head up to look him in the eye before continuing, "It's like your waistcoat, your bow tie, your bookshop, how shall I put it...they have that mix of neat and messy. Your waistcoat is hanging by a thread, but you cherish it more than anything, and it fits you perfectly. Your bow tie, always well done, but often a little crooked.

Your place, let's not talk about the mess it is, but I wouldn't have it any other way because it is you. This is how you have chosen to be. Since the day you gave up your sword out of compassion. That's the angel I love. Not the perfect angel, immaculate, well-groomed, not a wrinkle out of place. Because all this proves to me that you're no longer attached to heaven, but to this world. Because you've chosen it. All this is Aziraphale. Right down to the messy light curls, and I wouldn't have it any other way." 

He leaned forward and gently pressed his lips first to the angel's forehead, then to his lips in a tender and lingering kiss.

Then, as he straightened up, he whispered in his ear, "But still, your waistcoat..."

Aziraphale exclaimed, "Hey, don't you dare, I've had it since..."

He stopped because Crowley had just begun to laugh.

Assuming an air of dignity, he tugged at the flaps of his vest and smoothed them over his waist, saying, "It's a fine vest. I don't see anything wrong with it."

Crowley gently ran a hand through his hair and replied, "Yeah, there's absolutely nothing wrong with this vest. It's perfect in my eyes. As is the Angel who wears it."

He pressed his lips to the angel's again and gave him another kiss that went on and on.

In the eyes of heaven and hell, neither of them was perfect, but that didn't matter because they were perfect for each other.

_________

Still not beta'd

Still not my native language

Still hoping you'll enjoy this story  🥰

Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝

Ineffable Growing Love series : here (After season 2)

Ineffable Husbands masterlist : here (Before season 2)

[ineffable-alsaurus]

Crowley has tried a lot of things during his long existence, and so far nothing has been quite as enjoyable as kissing Aziraphale.

He knew he would like it, if they ever got around to giving it a go. Granted, the act of kissing in general was a very abstract idea, since Crowley had zero experience with it before he planted one on Aziraphale that first time. So he didn't know exactly what kissing Aziraphale would be like. But he knew, sure as anything, that he would really like it.

That was the one and only thing he'd guessed correctly about kissing. Everything else is a nice surprise.

What's especially surprising is how it makes Crowley feel. He fully realizes this is stupid; of course kissing someone he loves makes him 'feel' things. That's the whole point, isn't it?

It was just so… theoretical, before. It was an idea, a notion, a fancy. A little treat for his brain when he got bored.

Kissing Aziraphale in real life, on the other hand, is not a 'little treat'. It's a huge, delicious, completely and utterly devastating feast.

Which would already be difficult enough to deal with, what with Crowley finding himself wishing he were kissing Aziraphale instead of whatever else he's doing at any given moment.

But it's more than that, because Crowley wants more than that!

And sure, yes, he's always 'wanted more' with Aziraphale. Of course he has. But that, too, had been abstract.

Not anymore.

Oh, no, not anymore. There is nothing theoretical about the way Crowley feels when he's been kissing Aziraphale for too many minutes. It's like he's on fire, deep inside. Like he wants to press every inch of himself onto every inch of Aziraphale and sink right in. It's so visceral that it's almost like it's already happening.

He can imagine it so much more clearly now than he ever could before. It's no longer just, "oh, wouldn't it be nice to have sexual relations with my darling angel, I just wonder what that would be like!" No, these days it's more like, "oh that would be good. That would be sooooo good. It would feel exactly like this, but more intense, and closer and better and more, and then I'd come all over him and it would be sooooo goooooood, oh God'', etc, etc, etc.

Crowley thinks that Aziraphale might want him that way, too. He's not sure, but he knows his angel pretty well. He's getting a vibe, he thinks. And he tries to wait him out, see if he brings it up first…

Until one afternoon, snogging just inside the front door after closing the shop early, Crowley steps directly into Aziraphale's space without thinking. Just wanting to get as close as he possibly can.

And the feeling of their hips making contact for the first time, the way Crowley is 75% sure that he can feel a bulge in front of Aziraphale's trousers and 99% sure that Aziraphale can feel his own… Crowley closes his eyes and groans. Presses his forehead to Aziraphale's, takes a deep breath, and then reluctantly pulls away until they're no longer touching.

"Why on Earth are you stopping now?" Aziraphale asks in annoyance as he opens his eyes.

"We need to talk about sex, angel," Crowley says simply.

"Oh. Oh!" Aziraphale says, eyes widening before he squints a little in confusion. "Are you quite sure?"

"Oh, well, if you're not interested, we don't have to-"

"No, it's not that! I'm very- definitely- um, quite interested. I suppose I just thought you were the 'getting down to business' type. Is there much to talk about?"

Crowley frowns at Aziraphale, even as a fond smile grows on his lips. Silly angel.

"Yeah, you know, it might be a good idea. Communication, right? Honesty and openness and so forth? Making sure we're on the same page?" Crowley reminds him with amusement.

Really, after all the misunderstandings and mishaps they've had over the millenia, you'd think that by now Aziraphale might have bought a clue that they need to talk more, not less. Especially about things that are this important.

"Of course, yes, you're right," Aziraphale agrees easily, bowing his head in concession. "Obviously. Do go on."

"Right, so, here we go," Crowley begins. "First thing's first. Do you want to have sex?"

"Yes," Aziraphale answers dutifully.

"With me?"

"Crowley," Aziraphale says, exasperated. "There's communication, and then there's redundancy to the point of idiocy, you know."

continue reading Honesty Era on AO3 (6k, explicit, no warnings)