#I love fun toxic relationships... but like... with these two I would love to see them make it work- even if takes awhile | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

elix8r · 2 months ago

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Prada Shoes and I Love Yous

PAIRING: heeseung x fem!reader

GENRE: smut, angst, crack, (some?) fluff, college!au, exes to lovers!au, enemies to lovers!au, socialite/richkid!au

SUMMARY: Life as a socialite wasn’t all champagnes and designer labels, especially not with the turn your reputation took due to a simple misunderstanding. Now, you were being painted by everyone as a big fat cheater who shattered her sweet boyfriend’s heart—a narrative that couldn’t be further from the truth. In reality, it was him who had betrayed your trust. Frustrated and feeling deeply wronged, you returned to society and the new school year after a summer of cutting off contact with everyone and the drama. But just when you thought you were ready to face the world again, you were blindsided by something unexpected: the lingering effect Heeseung had on you. And who could blame you? Heeseung was way too hot for you to get over in just three short months and now, seeing him with the girl he once told you not to worry about all over him? Oh, it was on.

You refused to be replaced, labeled as a crazy ex, or forgotten. No, you were going to make Lee Heeseung realize that you were the best motherfucking thing to had ever happened to him.

WC: 21.4k

WARNINGS: some extent of emotionally cheating? (not actual cheating i swear it’s kinda unintentional), jake is a bestie and fwb hybrid (kinda flirty but it’s very much platonic i swear), so much miscommunication, profanity, drinking, drugs, physical altercation, mentions of puke, slut shaming, mentions of pregnancy (no one is actually pregnant), toxic relationship, roughdom!heeseung and sub!y/n, unprotected sex, oral (m recieving), rough sex, unprepped? sex (consensual), creampie, mirror sex, deepthroating, cowgirl, dick too big?, creampie, and i am so sorry but karina is a BITCH like it’s almost campy how villainess she comes off

AUTHOR'S NOTE: hope everyone has fun with this one!! had a lot of fun writing it like and i'd love to hear you guys' feedback! love you lots <3 ☺️

Fuck Lee Heeseung. Fuck Lee Heeseung. Fuck Lee Heeseung.

This was all you found yourself repeating in your mind like it was some mantra while you reapplied your lip gloss, making sure to take one last good look at yourself in the mirror before shutting it close once you felt the plane’s wheels coming to a stop. From the outside, you looked absolutely perfect as not a single hair could be found out of place; no one would’ve guessed that you had been on a plane for over 10 hours. But inside, you were a wreck as you felt your anxiety shooting up as your heart raced a million beats per minute.

“You need to loosen up, you look like you have a stick up your ass.” Jake was lazily scrolling on his phone while nursing a champagne in his hand, barely sparing a glance at you. He seemed to be in a much more relaxed state than you were.

You scoffed before sending him a glare. “You know, if anything, you should be the one panicking right now. Everyone’s going to be talking about how we came back together.”

“Good thing I don’t give a shit about what people say, right? Should’ve thought that through before inviting me,” Jake shrugged, finally lowering his phone to look at you. His nonchalant attitude was pissing you off. “Plus, this all just looks worse because Ryujin decided she wanted to spend one last week with whatever his name was.”

He wasn’t wrong. It hadn’t just been the two of you in Monaco for three months; Ryujin had also been very much present. However, she found herself a summer fling named Louis, and unlike you and Jake, she couldn’t find herself boarding your private jet without spending one last fiery week with her lover before saying goodbye for good and starting school again.

“Maybe we should have just stayed an extra week with her. It probably would have saved us from the shit show that I know we’re gonna be bombarded with the second we step off the plane.” You released a deep sigh before you started to gather your belongings around you.

Jake followed suit, grabbing his stuff and getting up from his seat. “Well, if we stayed back an extra week, then that would mean we’d have to deal with your mom’s wrath for missing her annual end-of-summer garden party that we promised we wouldn’t miss. You know how important it is for her, and to be honest, I’d rather face Heeseung’s wrath than your mom’s.”

He was right. This garden party of hers had been going on every year since even before you were born, and you’d be out of your mind to miss it. It was single-handedly the most important event every year for your family, and you couldn’t even begin to fathom how your mom would react to your absence.

You reached over and snatched the champagne glass out of his hand before you downed whatever was left in it in one gulp as you braced yourself, hoping the alcohol would give you the courage you needed to step off the plane.

“Well, then I hope you’re prepared to take on Heeseung. Maybe he’ll be nice enough to spare your pretty face. God knows it’s the only thing you have going for you.”

Heeseung was going to fucking kill Jake Sim.

When he woke up this morning, you were the last thing on his mind, something he seemed to have finally freed himself from. However, all the hard work he put into casting you away from his mind seemed to have been in vain, as now all he could think about was you and how you had returned after three months of radio silence with the guy you cheated on him with.

Livid didn’t even cover what he was feeling, and it was evident in the way he swung his club. Each hit seemed to be driven by a surge of pent-up frustration.

“What the hell, man? That’s the third time today you’ve been way off course. What’s going on?” Jay shot him an incredulous look as he tried to locate where the golf ball had landed.

Heeseung let out a frustrated groan as he ripped off his glove and shoved his driver back into his bag. “Y/N’s fucking back.”

That was all Jay needed to hear to understand what was going on with his friend. "Shit, I saw. I’m sorry dude, it’s fucked up."

Heeseung was in no mindset to be playing golf right now. All he wanted was to go back home and wallow miserably in his bed. Unfortunately, they were only on hole ten of eighteen, and judging by his performance today, Heeseung knew it was going to take awhile.

"Did you know?" Heeseung couldn't help but blurt out, his frustration evident in his voice as he watched Jay effortlessly swing a shot miles better than his own.

Confusion flickered across Jay's face as he turned to face his friend. "What do you mean?"

“Did you know that she was coming back with Jake?” Heeseung felt his jaw tense as he mentioned his ex-friend.

“I didn’t even know he was with her until today. Honestly, I thought he’d just fucked off somewhere and didn’t bother telling any of us, considering how things went down. You know me, I would’ve told you straight up if I had found out earlier.” Heeseung trusted Jay implicitly. He was as loyal as they came, but unfortunately, the same couldn’t be said for everyone in their friend group.

"Do you think Sunghoon knew?" Heeseung's question elicited an audible groan from Jay.

If anyone in their friend group knew how Jake spent his summer, it would undoubtedly be Sunghoon. However, Sunghoon was notoriously tight-lipped, especially when it came to sensitive matters. Since the breakup, the entire friend group had undergone an incredibly awkward shift. It seemed that everyone had more or less chosen a side, and allegiances were clear.

"You know he wouldn't tell us anything if he did. It's getting ridiculous. The other day, I saw Gaeul and him having brunch or something at the clubhouse, and the moment she spotted me, she practically sprinted over to explain herself. She claimed she's still 'Switzerland' in the whole situation and hasn't chosen a side," Jay recounted, frustration evident in his voice.

Heeseung almost snorted at the absurdity of it all. Their friend group had never been one to keep secrets or tiptoe around each other, but the last few months had been nothing but that. The betrayal by you and Jake had not only affected Heeseung's relationship with you but had also tainted the dynamic of their entire friend group.

“Literally, what is there to be ‘Switzerland’ about? I mean, this whole thing isn’t even complicated. Everyone saw them go into the bathroom together and come out literally holding hands. Trust me, I know what she looks like after giving head, and that's literally what she looked like in that video Beomgyu sent. Plus, Karina literally heard them.” Heeseung angrily got into the golf cart as Jay fished the keys out to start driving.

“Okay, well, no offense, but in all honesty, Karina’s probably not the most reliable source, cause she’s in an extremely biased position, but I guess that’s beside the point.” Jay’s words seemed to instantly bring a frown upon Heeseung’s face.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Heeseung’s tone sharply switched up in an almost defensive manner.

Jay, feeling this shift, nervously cleared his throat as he stammered, trying his best not to offend his already sensitive friend regarding an even more fragile situation. “I mean, uh, well. You know…”

“What?” The grip he had on the seat of the golf cart seemed to get tighter as he waited for his friend to elaborate.

“Dude, you can't be serious? You know Karina’s been trying to ride your dick for the past, what, give or take ten years? I mean, we all know that she’s never had a good relationship with Y/N, and I’m pretty sure most of that resentment stemmed from the fact that you’ve always been head over heels for Y/N.” Jay slowly parked the cart and turned off the engine as he explained.

Still not understanding Jay’s point, Heeseung furrowed his brows, shooting his friend another annoyed look before getting out of the golf cart. “What are you trying to get at?”

“Jesus fucking Christ, you’re dense. I mean, the last couple of months before Y/N cheated on you was the closest you seemed to have gotten with Karina because of that final project that you guys had or whatever. I mean, you were with her more times than you were with your own girlfriend, and knowing Karina, she seems like she could be delusional enough to have maybe taken that as a sign that you were interested in her? I mean, this is all speculation, but I’m just letting you know what we all saw.”

Jay cautiously treaded this topic. Heeseung was his best friend since they were babies, and he would always be on his side, but Karina was never anyone’s favorite with her extremely polarizing personality. He had no allegiance towards her, not to mention that she wasn’t actually even in their friend group and always only ever found lingering around wherever Heeseung was, so it was much easier for Jay to actually see through her. In fact, it seemed that all of their friends could pretty much catch on to Karina’s end goal except Heeseung.

“So you think it’s my fault that Y/N cheated on me?” The air got tense as Heeseung snapped at Jay while snatching his 7-iron out of the bag. “Just because I spent some time doing a stupid fucking school project with Karina doesn’t mean it gives her reason to go and suck off one of my best friends.”

Jay shook his head even before Heeseung was done with his sentence. Heeseung seemed to not be getting the point. “Fuck no, dude, that’s not what I’m saying. Karina has an incentive: you. If she gets rid of Y/N, then it means you’re up for grabs. Of course, Karina didn’t force Y/N to get on her knees for Sim, but she was the first one to come running, telling us what happened even before Beomgyu sent that video.” Heeseung was trying hard to focus on trying to get his ball on the green as he geared up to swing while listening to Jay.

“So you don’t think she should’ve warned me of what she heard?” He swung precisely, but it seemed that this whole course, to be precise, wasn’t going easy on him. He’d be lucky to get even a double bogey on the par-4.

Jay slightly grimaced at Heeseung’s shot. “No, it’s not that,” he let out a sigh as he walked over to Heeseung. “Look, you’ve been my best friend for as long as I can remember, and I know the past few months have been fucking hard because of what Y/N put you through, and I just want you to be careful. Karina’s always been kind of a conniving, spoiled bitch who finds a way to get what she wants. Just because she’s been warming your bed every night since Y/N fell off the fucking Earth doesn’t mean she should be someone you start trusting.”

There was nothing he could say back to his friend’s words and it seemed that what Jay had said clung on deep to Heeseung's thoughts throughout the day, casting a lingering shadow and leaving a bitter aftertaste in his mind.

A small bead of sweat trickled down your back as the sun's relentless heat beat down on you. You took a small sip from your now lukewarm glass of champagne, its warmth doing little to refresh you. Today felt even hotter than previous years, and once again, you found yourself questioning why your mother insisted on hosting her most important event during the hottest month of the year.

Your cheeks were hurting from all the forced smiles you’d already given to family friends and important figures in your mother’s business circle. This garden party was always about promoting her upcoming collection and ensuring the continued support, financial and otherwise (not that she needed any more money), of both new and old acquaintances and partners. So, as always, it was no surprise that you were dressed head to toe in unveiled pieces from your mother’s upcoming collection. While no one could deny her incredible eye for fashion and the breathtaking quality of her creations, the white-tiered tulle dress with its plunging neckline felt entirely too inappropriate for a garden party and was getting on your last nerve. You stood out like a peacock—a testament to your mother’s outstanding handiwork—but you weren't a fan of the attention it drew.

“I need to get out of this fucking dress,” you muttered through gritted teeth, your annoyance palpable.

Jake chuckled softly beside you. “I can think of a few ways to get you out of that.”

You shot him a sharp look, clearly unimpressed by his insinuation. “Don’t say shit like that, especially around everyone. It’s not funny.”

“What? No one's around to hear, and even if they did, it wouldn’t matter. Everyone already thinks we’re fucking, and to be fair, they’re not that off.” He shrugged, a smirk playing on his lips.

Without hesitation, you elbowed him hard in the ribs, your face growing even more pissed off. “That’s not funny, Jake. Seriously, shut up. It happened only a couple of times and that’s it. If anyone hears that, they’re actually going to think I cheated on Heeseung with you.”

Your pretty face sported a cold, serious expression, leaving no doubt about how much this mattered to you.

“Honey, I told you, they already think you cheated on Heeseung with me, so this isn’t going to change anything. Besides, you know damn well it wasn’t just a couple of times,” Jake rolled his eyes at your dramatics.

“Yeah, well, the difference is that every time I slept with you was when I wasn’t dating him, so I didn’t actually cheat. You’re just making everything worse by making it seem like you’re confirming what they already assume.” Your irritation was through the roof, and the heat was doing nothing to quell your annoyance.

Before Jake could say anything else, your mother’s saccharine voice filled the space. For once, you were grateful for her impeccable timing. “Oh, darling, I’ve been looking everywhere for you!”

The event’s dress code was always an all-white affair, but even then, your mother seemed to shine brighter than any of the guests. You were almost taken aback when you fully turned to face her. “Hey, Mom.”

You flashed her a tight smile, but she barely spared you a glance, her attention focused entirely on the figure next to you. Jake seemed to stiffen under your mother’s gaze. “Hello, Jake. You seem to be enjoying yourself,” she said, giving his attire a quick once-over and humming in approval. “You look quite nice. Brioni, I’m assuming?”

“Yes, as usual, the event is beautiful Mrs. L/N. You’ve definitely outdone yourself,” he nervously chuckled. Despite his attempts at flattery, your mother’s cold gaze remained fixed on him. “And you’re right, it is a custom piece from Brioni.”

“Unsurprising, seeing that your father is rarely seen in anything else. Perhaps you could enlighten him to broaden his wardrobe, and maybe we can see about getting you a custom piece of mine. I have no doubt the materials I use are incomparable to much of what’s in your wardrobe already. Though, I’m sure you already know that, since it seems much of your time these days is spent taking my beautiful pieces off my daughter.”

“Mom!” You gasped loudly, your eyes widening in disbelief at her bold statement. Your mother was never one to hold back her words, but this was beyond her usual antics. Next to you, Jake stiffened even more, nervously trying to regain his composure.

"Uh, Mrs. Y/LN, I can assure you that whatever you think is happening between me and your daughter is not actually true," Jake stammered, his voice strained with tension.

Your mother clicked her tongue in annoyance, obviously not buying his claims. "Well, the conversation I overheard the two of you having before I came seemed to say something different."

“Mom, can we not do this here?” You darted your eyes around, making sure that no one else was catching on to what was happening.

“Well, darling, I would usually never impose myself like this in your personal relationships, but it seems like the two of you have brought not only our families into this but now also my business as collateral just for the sake of some mindless fucking.”

You had never heard your mother speak with such scandalous vocabulary before. Seeing her like this was beyond unsettling and left you utterly speechless.

“Ma’am, I assure you that the rumors about our infidelity are not true at all. It’s been a huge misunderstanding that—"

"Jake, I've always held you in high regard, ever since you were a baby raised alongside my daughter. You've grown into a very smart and handsome young man, one your parents should be proud of. Out of respect for your mother, who you know is one of my closest and longest friends, I've tried to overlook what's been happening over the past few months. However, overhearing the two of you brazenly talking about your sexcapades in public, especially during one of the most important events of my year, is something I simply cannot ignore. This has not only strained my relationship with one of my closest business partners, but it has also jeopardized our families' standing. If anyone else had overheard, I can’t even begin to think how much worse the already damaging rumors would become."

“Mom seriously can you stop this,” you were furious that she would decide to do this here of all places. “This is fucking ridiculous and you know damn well that none of those stupid rumors are true. We can talk about this later, please.”

"I believe I'm entitled to speak as I please, especially considering this is my event," she retorted sharply. "Your father and I were generous enough to allow you to spend your entire summer break away without expecting you to address this mess you've created for us. I had hoped for better judgment from you. Instead, you and Jake decided to further exacerbate this situation by turning this trip into some sort of romantic getaway. I sure hope you were at least being smart and careful. The only thing that would make this situation worse is if you were to become pregnant. Who knows, you might even be pregnant right now. It wouldn’t even surprise me seeing as though that seems to be the only thing the two of you were doing in Monaco.”

Jake was a stuttering mess, his face flushed with embarrassment at the accusation. "Mrs. Y/LN, I swear that's not true," he managed to stammer out.

Before he could say anything else, your mother cut him off again. "I'm not so sure I can trust you on that. How can you be so sure that you didn't knock up my daughter?"

You were seething with anger at your mother's behavior, ready to intervene when suddenly a figure caught your eye.

Heeseung's fist connected with Jake's jaw before you even had a chance to react. The punch caught Jake off guard, and as he tried to recover, Heeseung landed another swift blow to his face.

"You got her pregnant?" Heeseung's voice was filled with anger as he launched himself at Jake, who was still reeling from the first two punches.

“What the fuck!” Jake groaned, struggling to fend off Heeseung's relentless assault.

Beside you, your mother was in a panic, shouting for security as everyone's attention turned to the commotion that erupted in front of you.

Before you could step in, Jay appeared out of nowhere, desperately trying to pull his friend away from their former friend.

"Heeseung, stop!" you screamed, rushing to Jay's aid.

But Heeseung was relentless, disregarding his surroundings entirely. All sense of decorum was abandoned as he straddled Jake, who was attempting to dodge Heeseung's blows while pushing him away.

From the other side, Sunghoon came running over to help pull Heeseung off of Jake. "Jesus Christ, Heeseung, get off him!"

After a couple of seconds of struggle, the three of you were finally able to pull Heeseung off of Jake, though he continued to struggle in attempts to break free. Security, called by your mother, arrived and joined in to help restrain the enraged boy.

Jake laid on the grass, his previously pristine custom white suit dirtied with splatters of blood and dirt from rolling around. Heeseung didn't look much better, his own suit now stained with blood, evidence of the fight. Despite being at a disadvantage, Jake had managed to land a few good punches, evidenced by the blood dripping from Heeseung’s nose. It was a chaotic scene, with whispers and murmurs from the other guests confirming their attention on the altercation. You could sense your mother's fury, even without seeing her directly.

"What the hell is this?" A gruff voice angrily interrogated.

Heeseung’s father had never been an easy person to be around, so you couldn’t even imagine how angry he currently was at his son’s behavior.

However, Heeseung seemed not to hear his father, his eyes staying trained on Jake, who was getting up with Sunghoon's help.

“Oh my, Liz, I am so sorry. I’m appalled; I genuinely am. I'm so embarrassed. I don’t know what came over him.” Heeseung’s mom quickly ran over to where your mother stood with fury and attempted to sincerely apologize.

“We are leaving.” Heeseung’s dad yanked his son from the security’s grip and started to drag him away, but not before also turning towards your mom with a stern look. “Yes, we apologize for our son’s behavior. We hope it didn’t ruin this beautiful event, and we will be excusing ourselves. Thank you for having us.”

You were still in shock with everything, and it seemed that everyone else was too, as no one moved and stood in silence, taking in everything that had happened. There was no way this just happened.

To say the last couple of days had been hell for you would be an understatement. Honestly, it felt even worse than the days following your breakup with Heeseung, when you could at least pack your bags and leave the country. But this time, with school starting in a week, that luxury would unfortunately not be granted to you a second time. Your parents were adamant that you face the mess head-on and frankly you found yourself wishing that you never returned from Monaco.

To make matters worse, Ryujin still wasn’t back. While she called every day, you still felt alone, especially since you hadn’t talked to Jake since your mom’s party. Rumors about your supposed pregnancy were rampant, further emphasizing your alleged infidelity, and you figured it was best to get some space from Jake until the rumors died down.

With nothing to do, you found yourself doing things you’d never normally do—like wandering down the chip aisle, looking for something to make you feel better about your situation.

“No, Ryujin, you don’t get it,” you huffed into the phone, frustration evident in your voice as you searched desperately for anything that sounded good. “I’ve gotten DMs from random people I’ve barely spoken to, asking if I’m actually pregnant and how far along I am. I’m so fucking sick of this.”

“Oh babe, I’m so sorry. This sucks so bad. It’s literally so fucking absurd and Heeseung was so stupid for this like I still can’t believe he did that. Don’t worry though, I’ll be there soon so just hold on,” Ryujin sounded sincere as the sound of waves echoed in the background. You envied your friend, who was probably at the beach right now, getting a nice tan with her hot beau, and not miserably suffering in this stupid predicament like you were.

“Ugh, I can’t wait until you’re here. I’m like seriously going through it and I just hope it’ll die down once school starts, but I doubt it because—”

“Y/N?”

You were abruptly cut off by a shrill voice. Even before you turned your head to face them, you knew exactly who it was and found yourself unable to hold back an exasperated groan. “Fuck, I’ll call you later, Ryujin.”

Karina had always been one of the most beautiful girls you knew, even from a young age and you couldn’t deny that she looked stunning now, even under the horrendously yellow dim lights of the grocery store. But, like always, she had a knack for bringing out a grimace on your face, which you sported as you turned to face her.

“Oh my God, no way! I thought it was you earlier but I was like, no way is The Y/N out shopping for groceries. But honestly, who else could it be? I mean, you’re unmistakable.” Karina held a shopping basket in one hand that barely had anything in it. She was dressed like she was about to attend a charity gala, a stark contrast to your Lululemon shorts and an old shirt from Heeseung’s closet.

“Hey, Karina,” was all you could let out before she animatedly started speaking again, not giving you a second to talk.

"It's been so long! I mean, how long has it been since we last saw each other? You didn’t even say goodbye to any of us and just left but you look great, especially considering—oh, and congrats! Honestly, I was actually worried it would be awkward between us, but once I heard the news, all my worries disappeared. You and Jake seem so happy together, and you have no idea how thrilled I was when I heard that you guys are about to start a family. It’s so cute and I now know that there's no reason for me to worry about you getting mad about me and Heeseung. Although I was a little surprised your boyfriend attacked mine like that, but I’m sure it was just a misunderstanding.”

Karina spoke without pausing, giving you no time to digest her words and she didn’t seem to notice your growing annoyance as she continued to babble with that smug look on her face.

“Wait hold on, you and Heeseung are dating?” There was no way you heard her right.

But it seemed that you did as she nodded with a bright smile on her face. “Yeah it’s still kind of new only a couple of months but it’s been amazing. I mean I’m sure you know just as well that he’s like literally the best.” Her voice slowly drowned out as you took everything in. A couple of months ago was literally when you left for Monaco so it meant that Heeseung didn’t waste any time to make Karina his girlfriend.

“What the fuck, Karina?” You didn’t hold back, making sure she knew you were beyond enraged at this new revelation.

Her face held a surprised expression as you cut her off abruptly. “I’m sorry, but what do you mean?”

You rolled your eyes. You knew she understood exactly what you were talking about, and it infuriated you that she was pretending otherwise. You knew Karina too well; she was reveling in the fact that she currently had something you didn’t for the first time in her life.

“Drop the act, Karina. I don’t have time for this shit. We both know exactly what you’re trying to do, and it’s pathetic. You and your friends can call me a slut for supposedly cheating on Heeseung, but it’s rich coming from you when you and Heeseung literally did the same thing. Not to mention the fact that you two didn’t even wait a decent amount of time before getting together after he and I broke up. So honestly, I hope you’re both happy and sincerely, fuck you both.”

You didn't bother to stick around to hear whatever else she had to say. As you turned and walked away, you felt your eyes welling up with tears. You thought you were over Heeseung, but clearly, that wasn’t the case. The revelation of his new relationship pulled at your heartstrings, making you wonder if you ever really mattered to him the way he did to you. Nothing hurt more than realizing that the two year-long relationship you cherished above all else might have been a joke to him.

“Ryujin, I really don’t think I’m up for going out,” you sighed, looking at yourself in the mirror. Ryujin, on the other side of the room, was finishing her makeup at the vanity.

“No way, I told you, you’re not staying holed up moping around because of Heeseung again. You already did that in Monaco, and I’m not letting you waste any more time on that asshole. You’re coming out with us, and you are going to have an amazing night.”

Ryujin had finally come back the day before, and while having her by your side made you feel better, you couldn’t stop thinking about your ex.

“I seriously doubt one night of drinking and partying will make Heeseung disappear from my thoughts,” you muttered, rolling your eyes. You knew Ryujin would end up dragging you out, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t complain the whole time.

“I think you’re underestimating the power of a good night out. Who knows, maybe you’ll find some hottie to get your mind off everything,” Ryujin shrugged while spritzing perfume. “Maybe you should go looking for Jake.”

You shook your head at her. “Jake’s not going to help.”

“Well actually, from what I remember I think Jake helped a good bit with speeding up the process of you getting over moping about Heeseung a couple of months ago so who’s to say that it won’t work this time?”

“I am not sleeping with Jake again. That would literally make everything like so much worse. Everyone already thinks I’m pregnant with his kid. I don’t need more things to fuel that rumor.”

Ryujin wasn’t wrong about your summer situationship with Jake helping to distract you, but continuing it back here would only add fuel to the fire. Not to mention, your relationship with Jake was purely platonic with some sexual attraction. That was all it ever was even back in high school, and you had both talked at length about how neither of you saw a relationship beyond friendship. So even if you went to him looking for something more, Jake ultimately wouldn’t be able to give you what you wanted.

“Well then there’s other people! What about-” You cut her off abruptly.

You cut her off abruptly. “Ryujin, I know you’re just trying to help, and I really do appreciate it, but I just think sleeping with other people isn’t going to solve anything. I just want to lay low this semester and focus on school. I don’t want to be wrapped up in more drama.” Done with the conversation, you grabbed your purse, suddenly more eager to get to the party if it meant changing the subject.

“Ready to go?” you asked, and just like that, her eyes lit up and a wide, giddy smile spread across her face as she eagerly followed you out.

The Uber ride was short, and before you knew it, you had arrived. Hyunjin was known for throwing the best parties, and tonight was no exception. The massive manor, which you were all too familiar with, was already buzzing with more people than you imagined his parents would ever find acceptable.

“Hey, there you guys are!” Ryujin’s close friend Yujin, who you were also friendly with, excitedly ran over to greet you both. She had been studying abroad for 6 months and you hadn’t seen her since so you were even more elated to see her.

“Hey, Yujin! It’s been a while! You and Sunoo looked like you were having the time of your lives in Italy.” You greeted her warmly, following her inside as she led you to where all the drinks were.

“Oh yeah, it was beyond amazing, but I’m sure nothing compares to Monaco. God, I haven’t been there in ages.” She poured out shots and passed them to you and Ryujin. Without hesitation, the three of you knocked them back, grimacing slightly at the aftertaste.

“Fuck, I already miss it. It took like an hour to say goodbye to Louis, and I was so upset for the first 30 minutes of the plane ride. But the good thing about summer flings is that after the goodbyes, there's nothing left to hold onto, so it’s easy to get over.” Ryujin poured another shot for both of you while Yujin reached for a can of Ranch Water.

“I literally thought they were going to try something serious since she was with him all summer. Half the time, I couldn’t even find her because she and Louis were off somewhere, but I guess he really was just a summer fling.” You nudged your friend as Yujin let out an amused giggle.

“I bet! Those pics on your most recent Insta post, man, they were hot. What about you, Y/N? Any European hotties catch your eye?” Yujin wiggled her brows, and you rolled your eyes while reaching behind her for a can of Ranch Water.

“More like an Australian hottie,” Ryujin teased, and you instantly elbowed her.

“Jesus Christ, Ryujin, seriously shut up.” You shot her an annoyed look.

Yujin, however, seemed to find amusement in Ryujin’s remark as she gave you a wide-eyed look while giggling. “No way, so it’s true then?”

“Fuck no. I mean yeah, we hooked up, but I swear to God I’m not pregnant.” You shook your head vehemently.

You saw Yujin open her mouth, but Ryujin beat her to it, grabbing your arm. “Don’t turn around.”

Your brows furrowed at her panicked actions, and you started to turn your head, but she quickly stopped you. “What? What happened?”

“Fuck, Heeseung’s here,” Yujin answered, her eyes darting around past your head. “He’s over there near the pool table. Don’t turn around.”

You stood still, heart racing, as you listened to your friends' directions. You saw Ryujin's expression shift from panic to a scowl.

“And he brought Karina. She’s stuck on him like a fucking leech,” Ryujin sneered. Even before the summer, Ryujin had always been Karina’s number one hater, so her reaction was no surprise.

Quickly, you decided it would be best to leave the area, and the girls seemed to think the same as the three of you started to move. But before you could take a step out of the kitchen, a booming voice caught your attention.

“Y/N!” Sunghoon’s voice echoed through the music, loud enough for everyone in the vicinity to hear. You stiffened as you realized your presence was now exposed to everyone.

“Fuck, it’s been a long time!” He approached with a massive smile and, before you could even respond, engulfed you in a tight hug. Behind him, you spotted Jake trailing close by, rolling his eyes at his friend.

"Hey, Sunghoon," you greeted him back, debating whether to reciprocate the hug he wasn't letting go of.

"Okay, buddy, that's enough," Jake intervened, yanking his friend back.

"Oh, princess, you got even prettier while you were away! If that's even possible, but damn, you look amazing," Sunghoon's red, dopey eyes hinted at his intoxicated state.

"He's crossed," Jake confirmed, as if reading your mind.

"Oh God, why did you let him do that again?" Ryujin scolded Jake, delivering a disapproving look along with a smack on his arm.

"What the fuck! I'm not his babysitter," Jake retorted, shooting Ryujin a pointed look.

"Well, he is your best friend," you shrugged.

"I'm totally fine, you guys worry too much," Sunghoon shot everyone a smile before reaching for the drink in your hand, which you quickly pulled away.

"Yeah, Sunghoon, maybe lay off the drinking and smoking for now. I think I still have the video from the last time you got crossed," Yujin remarked, raising a skeptical brow at his current state. The mention of the video drew snorts of amusement from everyone except Sunghoon.

Instead, Sunghoon's eyes widened at her words, shaking his head vigorously. "I swear that won’t happen tonight."

"Well, it might if you keep this up," Ryujin added, recalling the infamous incident the last time Sunghoon was in this state. It involved projectile vomiting on a girl followed by passing out on her, effectively ruining any chance he might have had with her.

"Whatever," Sunghoon rolled his eyes, turning away, but before he could even take a step, he turned right back around (unsteadily with Jake stepping in to steady him), and blurted out, "Heeseung's here."

You could hear Jake cursing under his breath at Sunghoon’s words, while Ryujin nodded.

"Yeah, we were trying to sneak out of the kitchen before they noticed us, and then you had to go and yell Y/N’s name," Ryujin added.

"Oh," Sunghoon sheepishly nodded. "My bad."

"Does he have to fucking bring her everywhere?" Jake muttered, casting another glance towards where Heeseung and Karina were.

"You know, I even heard Jay’s getting sick of her tagging along everywhere."

"Where’d you hear that?" You shot Sunghoon a suspicious look.

“Gaeul.”

"She still hangs out with them?" Ryujin scoffed, clearly annoyed.

"She claims to be the neutral party between us."

“So she’s still being a fucking dumbass?” Ryujin shot back, clearly unimpressed with their friend’s stance.

"Well, she still reports everything back to us, so it's not all bad," Jake tried to reason, but Ryujin wasn't buying it.

From next to you, Yujin chuckled. "Your friend group is so fucking messy, thank God I'm not involved. I'm going to find Hyunjin for some weed. Good luck sorting out your drama." She shot you a wink before briskly walking away before anyone could respond.

"Are we really that messy?" Sunghoon asked innocently, but before anyone could answer, he vomited everywhere.

You were cursing under your breath as you tried to wash the puke out of your shorts, fuming at Park Sunghoon. Thankfully, they were black, so staining wasn't an issue, but standing in your underwear in a house party bathroom, scrubbing your pants instead of enjoying the night, was infuriating. Even if you managed to clean them, you'd be stuck wearing damp pants for the rest of the night.

As you wrung out the fabric, desperate to dry them as much as possible, the bathroom door suddenly swung open.

“Oh! Sorry— Y/N?” Heeseung’s eyes widened in surprise when he realized not only that someone was already in the bathroom but that it was you.

In your haste to escape Sunghoon's vomit, you must have forgotten to lock the door. Naturally, Heeseung had to be the one to barge in.

The two of you stood there awkwardly, each taking in the other's appearance. It was technically your first real encounter since your return, discounting the brief moment at your mother's garden party before Heeseung was promptly escorted away by his parents.

He looked way too good, enough to stir butterflies in your stomach. It was unsettling how Heeseung could still have this effect on you after everything that had happened.

"Hey, Y/N," he greeted cautiously, breaking the silence. The tension in the room was palpable.

"Hey, Heeseung," you replied, unsure of how to navigate the awkwardness.

"Sunghoon was right," he blurted out abruptly, his words coming out in a rush before he could stop himself.

Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. "What?"

"I-I mean, he said... that you look even prettier now," Heeseung stumbled over his words, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment. "I mean, not that you weren't pretty before, but, um... yeah."

Your cheeks warmed at his unexpected compliment. This wasn't how you had imagined your first conversation with him after coming back would go.

"Uh, thanks."

A few more uncomfortable seconds ticked by before Heeseung finally seemed to notice your state. "Uh, what are you doing?"

You had completely forgotten about your current attire—just in your underwear, a lacy black thong that had driven Heeseung wild a few months ago.

"Oh, Sunghoon threw up on me after getting crossed," you explained, shaking your head in annoyance as you returned to wringing out your shorts.

"Again? Fuck, he really needs to learn not to do that. If he had a nickel for every time he puked on a pretty girl while he was crossed, he'd have two," Heeseung remarked, a hint of amusement in his voice. You couldn't help but let out a small laugh. There was no way you were actually laughing at your cheating ex’s jokes.

Heeseung seemed to relax a bit upon hearing your giggles, joining in with a laugh of his own.

"Here, let me help. There's probably a dryer around here somewhere," he offered, finally deciding to step into the bathroom as he closed the door behind him. He bent down, rifling through a couple of cabinets until he found what he was looking for.

"Fuck, I don't know why I didn't think of that earlier," you muttered, taking the dryer from him and plugging it in before switching it on.

He reached over to hold your shorts for you while you dried them. After a few minutes, you turned off the dryer, confident your shorts were dry enough by now. "Thanks," you said, taking them from him.

As you looked up at him, you suddenly became aware of the closeness between the two of you. Your breath caught in your throat as your eyes locked with his.

Fuck he was hot.

You could feel the all-too-familiar warmth spreading throughout your body as the two of you held each other's gaze, neither daring to look away. Slowly, almost as if guided by muscle memory, you inched your faces closer until you could feel his breath on your lips, poised to kiss him. But a small voice in your head stopped you before you could fully lean in.

“Wait.”

Heeseung instantly pulled back. "Fuck, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

"No, no it's not that. I can’t do that to Karina," you hurriedly explained, shaking your head. Tears threatened to spill over as the pain of Heeseung's past betrayal resurfaced. Despite any animosity toward Karina, you couldn't bring yourself to inflict that same hurt on anyone else.

"What?" Heeseung furrowed his brows, confusion etched across his face as he looked at you.

"Heeseung, you can't just fucking cheat on her after you cheated on me with her!" You shot him an incredulous look, unable to believe how close he had come to infidelity once again.

His head shook vehemently, confusion clouding his eyes. "What do you mean? If anything, you're the one who's cheating!"

"Jesus Christ, for the last fucking time, I'm not dating Jake!" You yelled in frustration.

“And I’m not dating Karina!”

The two of you stared at each other, mutual confusion now evident, leaving you both speechless.

“What?”

"Yeah, I'm not dating her! And what do you mean you're not dating Jake?" Heeseung shot back, equally bewildered.

"I literally saw her a couple of days ago, and she told me the two of you had been dating for a couple of months," you said, watching Heeseung shake his head in disbelief.

"What the fuck! She's fucking lying, we are not dating, let alone have been dating. That fucking bitch, literally what the fuck," Heeseung was beyond pissed.

You scoffed, equally heated. "Karina was literally rubbing it in my face about how happy you two were. And for your information, I have never dated Jake."

"What the fuck, Y/N? I fucking punched him!" Heeseung felt like he was going insane. Everything he had believed for the past few months was suddenly a lie.

You rolled your eyes at his outburst. "Yeah, I fucking know. I was there, if you remember! He still has a fucking split lip because of you, and my mom's still beyond mad about it."

You had to be lying, Heeseung couldn’t believe your words. “There’s no fucking way.”

“Yeah you fucking dumbass, you beat him up for nothing.”

“Wait, wait, wait no it’s still fucking justified! He was one of my best friends who went on and fucking slept with my girlfriend!” There was no way the two of you were actually having this conversation at a raging party after not seeing each other for three months.

"No, he didn't! Or at least not while we were dating, and I'm also not fucking pregnant!" Your voice echoed in the cramped bathroom. You were still intoxicated and could feel a headache coming on.

"Fuck you! Literally, everyone saw you two that night," Heeseung retorted sharply, but before he could continue, it seemed he fully absorbed your words, his eyes narrowing in disbelief. "So you have been fucking Jake!"

"Yeah, but only after we broke up, not before! And you can't be acting all innocent when you've literally been with Karina!" You were annoyed by his accusatory tone. He was such a fucking hypocrite.

"Okay, but I didn't blatantly sleep with her at a party while we were still together like you did—"

You cut him off by smashing your lips against his, needing to silence him in any way possible. You couldn't stand another moment of arguing about this.

You could feel Heeseung freeze for a second, taken aback by your action, but he quickly recovered as you could feel his lips move against yours.

There was nothing romantic about the kiss as the two of you hungrily pushed back against each other, fighting for dominance. Teeth clashed against each other as your tongues battled back and forth and you could barely breathe, but it seemed that neither of you considered stopping anytime soon.

His hands quickly found themselves ripping your top off you as yours went straight down to undo his pants and push them down. You finally pulled away from the kiss to spit on your hand before going straight back into his lips. Not a second was spared to think about your actions as you didn’t hesitate to stick your hand down his underwear. He was already half-hard and you quickly wrapped your hand around his length, inciting a groan out of him.

While one hand worked on pushing down his underwear the other worked on pumping him. Heeseung was in almost the same state as one of his hands was found groping at your boobs, playing with your nipple, while the other also attempted to pull your underwear down.

As soon as your thong reached mid-thigh, Heeseung quickly broke the kiss to turn you around and roughly push you down against the bathroom counter. You jolted at the cold counter pressing against your already sensitive nipples but Heeseung pushed down hard on your back so you couldn’t lift yourself up. You looked helpless in the mirror and without warning you felt his dick plunging deep inside of you.

You gasped at the intrusion. Sharp pain erupted within you as tears welled in your eyes and you could do nothing except tightly squeeze them shut while your hands desperately attempted to grab at anything to hold on to. Heeseung had started to fuck you without even giving you a second to adjust and your cries filled the bathroom.

You hadn’t been fucked like this in so long and sure Jake was a freak in bed with a big dick but he had never considered fucking you before making sure you were prepped. No, this was Heeseung’s specialty. He fucking loved it and you couldn’t help but also find yourself loving the pain that came with his pleasure.

“Fucking slut, look at yourself,” Heeseung growled in your ear before roughly grabbing your hair and pulling it back, forcing you to face yourself in the mirror.

“Please, Heeseung,” you could barely moan out.

His hand gripped your hip so tightly that he knew bruises from his fingers were sure to be left afterward and his eyes were crazed as he battered himself even harder against your cervix, giving you no respite.

“What? What else could you want, I’m already fucking you. Greedy whore.” You felt yourself clench tighter around him as you heard his words. You were almost there as you could feel the tight coil just about ready to snap.

“Oh fuck, Heeseung harder,” you screamed.

Heeseung did just as you asked and as if it was possible, you felt him force himself even deeper inside you at a faster pace. You knew he was battering deep at your cervix, but you were too focused on chasing your orgasm that you couldn’t even care for the dull aching pain. His hand in your hair pushed your head against the mirror and you found yourself unable to stop yourself from drooling and fogging up the mirror. His animalistic grunts filled your ear and the grip in your hair got tighter.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You screamed out as the coil snapped and you felt yourself reaching your ultimate high. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you slumped against the mirror, having no strength to hold yourself up.

Heeseung was also close as you felt his cock twitch inside you and before you knew it, warm spurts of cum painted inside of you as you felt him thrust a couple of more times while he panted. He came so much that you could even feel some drip down the inside of your thighs.

“Fuck,” he breathed out as he slowly pulled out, watching his cum drip out of you and land on the bathroom floor.

You were still slumped against the mirror, attempting to catch your breath and process what had just happened.

As your eyes connected with Heeseung’s through the mirror, a rush of emotions overwhelmed you. The weight of what the two of you had just done bore down on you, and shame began to smother you, making you feel like you were suffocating. You couldn't stay there with him a moment longer. Quickly, you dressed yourself, doing your best to ignore the aching pain between your legs. Heeseung looked confused by your sudden change, but before he could say anything, you were out the door, leaving him to dwell on the implications of your actions.

You honestly hadn’t been listening to anything Ryujin had been saying for the past couple of minutes as she rambled on. Instead, you stared at the piece of salmon on your plate, analyzing each line that ran through the fish. If you didn’t focus on this, your mind would start drifting back to what happened yesterday, and you'd rather shoot yourself in the foot than think about that.

“Hey, Y/N, are you even listening?” Ryujin raised her voice, trying to get your attention.

Snapping out of it, you finally took your eyes away from your dinner and looked up at her. “Oh, sorry, I got distracted.”

“Yeah, no shit. I’ve been talking to you, and you went catatonic or something. What is up with you?” She furrowed her brows at your unusual behavior.

“Nothing, I’m fine,” you quickly responded, but you knew the second she put her utensils down that she wasn’t buying it.

“Don’t fucking try to lie to me. I can see through your bullshit. What’s wrong?” Her gaze was intense, analyzing you as if there would be an external sign explaining your strange behavior.

You sighed, debating whether to tell her exactly what had happened. Deciding against it, you realized that if you opened that can of worms, things would get even messier. “Uhm, I don’t know, I guess I’m just still hungover.”

“You didn’t even drink that much yesterday, though,” she said, brows still furrowed. She had noticed you hadn’t come out of your room all day and had to literally drag you out just to get dinner with her.

“Are you sick? You don’t really look sick though.”

You shook your head, searching for anything to blame your odd behavior on. “Uhm, I just think I bruised my cervix, and it just hurts.”

Her eyes instantly widened, and you could see her holding back a grin. “Oh my fucking God, you slut. You had me thinking something actually bad had happened! When did you and Sim even run off to fuck?”

You sighed in relief, glad that she was distracted by the news you had just dropped on her. She didn’t notice the lingering look in your eyes that indicated there was actually something deeper driving you mad.

“Uh, quickie in the bathroom. I don’t know, you were probably too drunk to notice.”

She hummed while nodding. “Yeah, I’m not going to lie, I don’t really remember much after Sunghoon puked everywhere. But fuck, a bruised cervix from a quickie is insane. Oh, Yujin is going to love this.”

“Yeah, it’s a fucking bitch. I feel like I’m sitting on a knife or something,” you said. You weren’t lying about this part—you were sure Heeseung had actually bruised your cervix with how hard he fucked you last night—but you were fine letting her think you had slept with Jake instead.

“Oh, my poor baby. No wonder you’ve been in bed all day. Let’s just get this boxed up and head back to the apartment. Geez, I’m gonna have to have a talk with Jake later.” You flashed her a smile, nodding at her suggestion, glad that this not only got her off your back but also got you out of having to stay another thirty minutes at this restaurant.

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:

if anyone asks we fucked last night kk?

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

wtf

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:

no questions pls

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

fuck that what’d u do 🤨

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:

none of your business go back to playing roblox with riki or something 🙄

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

THAT WAS ONE TIME

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

fuck you

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

tell me!!!!! you made it my business when you dragged my dick into whatever it is so i deserve to know 😤

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:

i bruised my cervix

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

HUH

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

NO I’M NOT TAKING THE BLAME FOR THAT??

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:

everyone’s gonna think you have a big dick

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

bet 🙂‍↕️

The rest of the weekend passed without Ryujin or anyone else probing into your life, and you couldn’t have been happier. There were so many moments where you debated whether or not you should reach out to Heeseung, but you quickly dismissed the idea. Besides, you had blocked him on everything, and you were sure he had done the same, so there would be no point in trying.

Distracted by thoughts of Heeseung, it had completely slipped from your mind that school was starting back on Monday. Last night (thanks to Ryujin of course), you hurriedly packed your school bag and made sure you had everything for the first day.

And while you usually enjoyed school, just from today, you already felt overwhelmed. It seemed that all your professors had decided to assign work and readings for the next class. You were already swamped with assignments, feeling the weight of the semester ahead.

“Okay, but don’t you think I at least deserve to know who you slept with?” Jake's voice cut through your thoughts as you walked through the library shelves, searching for a book your professor had assigned out of nowhere that wasn’t even mentioned in the syllabus. You had been barely listening to his yapping as most of your focus was on finding the book.

“Ryujin won’t stop talking my ear off about how I broke you and how you couldn’t move all weekend. She thinks I’m an ass and won’t stop scolding me like I’m the one who did it! I’m a gentleman—I’d never bruise anyone’s cervix without permission,” Jake said with an exasperated tone, trailing behind you.

“I’m pretty sure gentlemen, at least the ones i know don’t beg on their knees for anal-”

He cut you off, his eyes widening. “Alright, alright! That was one time and I was drunk. Jesus, woman! And don’t act like you didn’t let me do it—you were perfectly fine with it. Either way, I still feel like I should know who the fella is.”

“Please don’t say fella, it’s such a turn-off.” You scrunched your face at his choice of vocabulary, shaking your head before turning back to search for your book.

“Okay, fine, whatever. I just want to know who I’m protecting from Ryujin’s annoying ass, and honestly, I think Sunghoon overheard her, so now we can assume the whole school knows.” It was well-known that once any news hit Sunghoon, it spread through the school like wildfire. He had a bit of a loose lip and an affinity for gossip, making him the school’s personal Deuxmoi, but with none of the anonymity (maybe Perez Hilton was a better comparison).

“I’m serious, Jake, you don’t want to know. Just leave it. You owe me anyway.” By now, you were growing increasingly irritated with Jake’s relentless probing and the fact that you still couldn’t find the damn book.

He shot you an incredulous look. “Owe you for what? Now you’re just making up debts that don’t even exist!”

“Anal,” you replied without missing a beat, already smiling, knowing his reaction.

“Oh my God, Y/N, fuck you literally! Geez, if someone had told me this was the price I had to pay for putting it in the ass once, I wouldn’t have even touched it with a ten-foot pole,” Jake exclaimed, and you couldn’t help but giggle. You loved to mess with Jake, especially because he was always so overly dramatic and had the best reactions.

“Seriously, Jake, you don’t want to know. You did your job, so thanks, but please stop bothering me about this.” You flashed him an exaggerated smile and patted him on the head.

Jake’s eyes widened, and he stopped in his tracks. “No fucking way.”

“What?” You didn’t like how he was staring at you.

“Please don’t tell me you slept with Heeseung.” The smile on your face instantly vanished as you froze at his words. How the fuck did he know?

“No fucking way. You just slept with the enemy? Are you kidding me? Do you see this?” He gestured dramatically at his face. “This is the aftermath of my survival from his wrath and proof that I fought valiantly for you. And you go ahead and sleep with him? Oh my God, and you made everyone think I fucked up your vagina when it was actually him? Holy shit, wait until Ryujin hears about this.” You quickly reached over and clamped your hand over his mouth, realizing how absurdly loud he was being in the library.

“Shut the fuck up, you’re practically screaming! And what the fuck are you even talking about? Of course, I would never sleep with Heeseung.” You did your best to mask your surprise, hoping he wouldn’t catch on.

Jake shook his head, scoffing in disbelief. “You’re such a shit liar. The only other time I remember your cervix getting bruised was when Heeseung fucked you on that yacht last Christmas. Remember how you had a hard time sitting straight at Christmas dinner?”

Fuck, he got you there.

You sighed and reluctantly nodded, closing your eyes in frustration. “Okay, fine. But please don’t tell Ryujin, Sunghoon, or anyone else. I already feel like shit about it, and my self-worth is in the gutter right now. I’ve been sick all weekend just thinking about it.”

“He didn’t force you or anything, right?” Jake's face shifted to one of genuine concern, his brows knitting together.

You shook your head. “No, of course not. It’s just that I regret it so much. I felt so gross afterward. It was just a really, really bad drunken mistake, and I don’t want to talk about it. Seriously, thanks for covering for me. You’re literally the best because I really don’t want anyone to find out. I just want to forget about it.”

Jake studied you for a moment, clearly understanding how much this was affecting you. He nodded, reaching out to give you a comforting hug, which you gratefully returned while you let out a sigh. “Yeah, don’t worry. I won’t say anything. Just let me know if he tries anything else or if you need anything.”

The hug was comforting, a small balm for the turmoil of the weekend. You were relieved he didn’t press further or make you feel worse about what happened. However, as you started to pull away, a familiar voice sliced through the air, bringing with it an overwhelming sense of déjà vu. Jake’s groan confirmed the arrival of the last person you wanted to see.

“In the library is kinky, but what can I expect from the two of you? Always so classy,” Karina’s smug tone cut through the air. You and Jake quickly broke from the hug, and you rolled your eyes as you faced her, already irritated by her presence.

“Are you stupid or like blind? Cause obviously if you weren’t then you’d be able to clearly see we were just hugging you fucking dumbass,” Jake snapped back, his tone sharp. Normally, you’d find his sass amusing, but Karina’s presence seemed to have sucked out any potential humor in the air.

“Jesus, Jake, you’re such an ass,” Karina snapped back at him before turning her attention to you. “Get your dog on a leash, would you? Maybe you should have been more careful about who you chose to have a kid with. The anger issues are seriously concerning with this one, not to mention the aggression. Heard about what happened over the weekend.”

“Karina literally shut the fuck up. You know damn well I’m not pregnant. It’s not even funny anymore; you’re just dragging it out. Just fucking mind your own business,” you snapped, your anger bubbling over. You could see Jake’s jaw clenched tight, his irritation matching your own.

“Well actually it kind of is my business 'cause Heeseung has been MIA all weekend, and I can’t help but wonder—since you’re such a slut—if you had something to do with it. The past few months since you two left were perfect, but the second you come back, everything seems to be fucked up. So tell me, what the hell happened at the party?” Karina’s sneer was almost unbearable, and you fought the urge to slap her.

“Maybe he finally realized what a fucking bitch you are.”Jake’s voice was laced with disdain. If Ryujin was Karina’s biggest hater, Jake wouldn’t be far behind her. Even as kids he hated even having to sit at the same table as her so his hostility towards her was all too familiar for you.

Karina ignored him as her glare remained fixed on you. Her pretty face now twisted into a deep frown and you knew she was pissed. It was a stark contrast to the fake friendliness she’d shown you just a week ago at the grocery store.

“I didn’t fucking do anything, and I don’t want anything to do with him, so fuck off. Seriously. Maybe Jake’s right—he finally realized how much of a clingy piece of shit you are,” you shot back, frustration evident in your voice. You should have known that Karina would notice Heeseung missing from her side for a good portion of Friday night.

Karina’s expression hardened as she took a step closer, unyielding. “You’re such a shit liar. What did you do?”

“This is bullshit. Let’s fucking go,” Jake said, grabbing your arm and pulling you away. Neither of you wanted to spend another second there.

“You know he said I did it better than you, right?” Karina’s taunt was intended to provoke, and it did just that. You froze, feeling her words hit hard despite knowing she was just trying to get under your skin.

“C’mon, let’s go. Don’t fucking listen to her,” Jake urged, tugging you along again. As much as you tried to ignore her, her words had a lingering effect, and you hated that they got under your skin.

You didn’t care that this was your last year in college; you were convinced that you needed to transfer anywhere far away from here. There was no way you could endure a whole year of torment from Heeseung and Karina. As if to cement this decision, today seemed determined to be the worst day of your life. The moment you arrived at your apartment, rage surged through you when you saw who was waiting for you in front of your door.

“I’m going to fucking call security,” you instantly snapped, pulling your phone out of your back pocket.

Heeseung’s eyes went wide as his hands reached out in front of him. “Wait, wait, wait! Please, Y/N.”

You stared up at him, his eyes pleading with you to hear him out. Those bambi eyes always got to you, and this time was no different. With a roll of your eyes, you slowly put your phone down. “Okay, but I swear to God, if you try anything—”

“I swear I won’t! I promise, I just really need to talk to you. I’ve tried texting you, but I think you blocked me,” Heeseung said, sheepishly scratching the back of his head.

“Fine,” you muttered before walking past him, opening your apartment door, and stepping inside. You left the door open, signaling that he could come in, but he seemed hesitant, staring at the open door.

“Are you coming in or not?”

He blinked a couple of times, surprised that you were allowing him into your apartment, but he quickly followed you in and closed the door behind him. He hadn’t been inside in so long that it felt almost surreal. Everything looked exactly the same, and he found himself realizing that he had kind of missed being here.

“Wow, nothing’s changed,” Heeseung remarked, his tone revealing his surprise, especially as he noticed the photo of the two of you still on top of the kitchen counter.

You followed his gaze and felt heat rise to your face. You didn’t really know why you hadn’t taken it down. “Uh, yeah, I mean, I also haven’t been here for like three months, so I didn’t really have time to change anything.”

Heeseung nodded, but as his eyes trailed back to you, he found himself staring, forgetting his words. You were as gorgeous as ever, but it seemed that the time away had only made him realize how even more beautiful you were.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” The air between the two of you was awkward, just like at the party however, seeing him sober during the day gave you a much clearer look at him, and you wanted to fucking die. You hated that effect he had on you.

“Oh, yeah, sorry, uh, I just wanted to check up on you. Friday was kind of intense, and you ran off before I could say anything, so I was worried. I’m sorry for being so rough with you. I shouldn’t have done that.” Heeseung had been beating himself up over how he had treated you, so much so that he hadn’t talked to anyone all weekend despite his phone blowing up with messages from his friends.

“It’s fine. It was something we both wanted, and if anything, it’s on me. I kissed you first, so I’m sorry for that.”

Heeseung shook his head. “No, don’t be sorry, seriously it’s okay, but uhm, I also just wanted to make sure you knew that I wasn’t lying when I said I wasn’t dating Karina. I swear I’m not.”

Your brows furrowed as you recalled the incident in the library a couple of hours ago. “Well, does Karina know that?”

“What?”

"She confronted me and Jake at the library, demanding to know what I did for you to ghost her all weekend." Heeseung frowned slightly at Jake’s name, and his frown deepened as he listened to what Karina had done. "From what it looks like, she seems to believe that your relationship is much more than whatever you’re saying it is."

“What the fuck? I swear we’re not together. I—” He stopped himself and sighed, realizing that to make you understand he was telling the truth, he had to tell you everything. “Fuck, I— Uh, shit, we’ve just been kind of hooking up, but I swear that’s all.”

He looked almost embarrassed admitting the nature of his and Karina’s relationship, and you could feel a part of your heart waver at what you heard. For him to admit out loud to you and confirm what you had thought was happening hurt despite you knowing that you didn’t have a right as you two weren’t together anymore.

“Oh, uh, okay.” You nodded as you quickly turned around and opened the fridge. You pretended to look around as if you meant to open the fridge before reaching to get the Brita out for water. You knew that if you faced him, the tear welling up in your eyes would pour down your face.

Heeseung went into a near-panic as he saw your reaction. Having dated you for over two years and known you for your entire life, he could tell you were upset. He noticed your shoulders tensing as you kept your back to him, looking into the fridge.

“Wait, wait, but I swear it’s nothing more than that, and I promise whatever happened between Karina and me is over. I don’t have any feelings for her—I never did. She was just there after you left, and it just happened,” he rushed to explain. But his words only seemed to make you feel worse as he continued to ramble.

“Why are you telling me this? You think this is going to make me want to get back with you?” You shook your head in annoyance, grabbing a glass from a cabinet and filling it with water from the Brita.

“No! I’m not trying to convince you of anything,” he said, now genuinely panicked. This was not how he intended the conversation to go.

“You know what she said?”

“Huh?”

“Karina, you know what she said?” He slowly shook his head, clearly confused by where you were going with this.

“She said that you told her she did it better than I ever did,” you snapped, your anger evident as you stared him down.

His eyes widened in shock, and he scoffed in disbelief. “What the fuck! I’ve never said anything like that to her or to anyone, and it’s not fucking true.”

“What? So she’s just lying to get under my skin?” You were fuming, frustration etched across your face. “Karina’s a fucking bitch, but even she wouldn’t just make something like that up. You must’ve hinted at something for her to believe it.”

“No, no, no, I swear I haven’t said or done anything remotely like what she’s claiming. She’s a fucking liar,” Heeseung's anger flared as he defended himself, clearly outraged at Karina’s audacity.

“Well, it still doesn’t change the fact that you ran straight to her bed the second I was out of the country—literally one fucking day after we broke up!” You huffed, clearly pissed.

“Ok well don’t fucking act like you didn’t do the exact same with Jake. What the hell, Y/N? It isn’t my fault we broke up! You literally slept with one of my best friends!” Heeseung's frustration boiled over, clearly bewildered that you were still trying to act like you had no role in ending the relationship.

“I’ve told you a million times that I didn’t cheat on you with Jake! What more do I have to say for you to believe me?” You were fed up with defending yourself on this issue.

Heeseung rolled his eyes, “Honestly, aren’t you tired of keeping all this up? Beomgyu’s video and Karina along with everyone else hearing about you two should be enough proof.”

“Oh my fucking God! Jake went into the bathroom with me to help because I was puking my guts out. I drank way too much that night because I was so upset after seeing my fucking boyfriend cuddling with some other bitch all night! You’re genuinely a complete moron if you think Beomgyu and Karina are reliable sources. Beomgyu’s been a fucking asshole to me since freshman year because he’s still bitter that I refused to sleep with him, and Karina has wanted to get with you for as long as I can remember. Seriously, I thought you had at least some common sense in you!” You were yelling so loudly that your throat was already starting to feel raw.

Heeseung shook his head in disbelief. He had no idea Beomgyu had even tried to make a move on you, and now that he thought about it, he realized there had always been tension between the two of you. While he knew about Karina’s crush on him, he hadn’t thought she’d actually go as far as to lie about this. “Okay, well people still heard you two together.”

“Fucking hell, Heeseung, it was a house party with a hundred people. You really think anyone could hear anything over the music? You know what, whatever—believe what you want. There’s no point in trying to convince you otherwise. I’ve been honest with you the whole time, and it’s been you who’s been unwilling to listen. You dumped me without even considering my side, even though you were the one neglecting me during that last month before we broke up, spending all your time with Karina. Honestly, even if you’re telling the truth about not sleeping with her before we broke up, it doesn’t change the fact that you emotionally cheated. The number of dates you forgot or canceled to be with her, and how many times I saw you two together on campus when you said you were just hanging out with the guys. Whatever. It doesn’t matter anymore. We’re not together. Just get out.”

Tears streamed down your face, and you didn’t bother wiping them away. You wanted Heeseung to see the pain he had caused you.

Heeseung was at a loss for words as he saw the pain etched across your face. It broke his heart and he couldn’t help but start to realize that maybe there was a chance you were telling the truth and that he might be to blame for everything. He felt his heart crumble. “Y/N…”

You sniffed and shook your head. “Get out, Heeseung. I never want to see you again.”

It had been a week since Heeseung had gone over to your apartment, and every day since, he had been determined to find a way to make it up to you. He knew what your last words to him were, but there was no way he was going to let you go that easily, especially now that he realized he was most likely the one in the wrong and that Karina was a fucking bitch. He had come to that solid conclusion five days prior when he finally decided it was time to confront her.

“Oh my God, what the fuck? Seriously, where have you been? What happened? You literally just disappeared,” Karina ran over to him once she saw him at the café he told her to meet him at.

Even looking at her face made Heeseung want to vomit. “I heard what you did.”

Karina frowned, not understanding what he was saying as she took a seat across from him. “What do you mean?”

“Y/N told me about what you did at the library.” Heeseung tried his best to keep his tone even, attempting to mask the rage he was feeling toward her.

Karina nervously laughed, trying to brush it off. So, he was with you while he ghosted her. “Oh yeah, I ran into her and Jake trying to get it on at the back of the library. Isn’t that fucking insane, like in public like that?”

Heeseung wasn’t in any mood to entertain her. He was already at a boiling point. “Cut the fucking bullshit. She also told me what you said to her at the grocery store. I don’t know what I did to make you think that we’re dating, but we’re not. I don’t even remotely like you.”

“What?” Karina was taken aback by his words. Sure, Heeseung was never as affectionate and loving towards her as he was with you, but she thought she had made good progress in getting him to fall for her.

“Yeah, so I swear to God if I hear you telling anyone else that we’re dating, I will get a fucking restraining order. You have been nothing more than an easy lay for me to get my mind off Y/N this whole time. I let you hang around me because I felt bad, but that’s over now, especially since I realized you’ve been lying to everyone, including me, about everything.”

Karina’s face paled as she took in his words. She opened her mouth to say something, but he didn’t give her a chance. “Also, you’re delusional if you think you’re even comparable to Y/N, much less better than her. Go learn how to actually suck a dick before going around telling anyone that. Seriously, fuck off, and don’t ever talk to me or my friends again.”

Heeseung took off right after that, leaving Karina sitting alone at the table. It felt like a weight had been lifted off his chest as he stormed out of the cafe. Since then, he’d been planning a way to get you to hear him out. The only thing he could come up with was outsourcing, and in this case, that meant trying to reach you through the people you hung around.

It was a no-brainer that trying to talk to Ryujin and actually getting her to hear him out would be harder than getting you to talk to him again, so that was out of the question, which left him with only one other choice.

Just standing in front of the apartment was making him pissed, but he knew this was probably his best bet. He let out a big sigh before knocking loudly. He waited a couple of seconds, and after a bit, he wondered if he should knock again, but before he could, the door opened.

“What the fuck?”

Heeseung was the last person Jake would have expected to be on the other side of the door, and it caught him severely off guard.

Heeseung hadn’t seen Jake since he beat him at your mother’s garden party, and while it seemed that any previous marks left on his face from the fight were gone, Heeseung still felt bad. Okay, well, actually he didn’t feel that bad because he was still beyond pissed at Jake. Heeseung had by now come to the conclusion that you were most likely telling the truth about not cheating on him, but it still didn’t change the fact that Jake had fucked you who knows how many times after the two of you broke up.

Jake had always been a very close friend of his since childhood, and if Heeseung was being honest, in high school there were a good number of times when he couldn’t help but find himself envying his friend. It was kind of always known in your friend group that Heeseung had always had a tiny bit of a crush on you. So, when it became known that Jake had been the one to take your virginity, Heeseung was beyond crushed. In fact, he had avoided Jake for a good week, too envious of the fact that it wasn’t him who had been your first. But he was quickly able to get (mostly) over it as he couldn’t deny that he wasn’t surprised; you and Jake had always been the closest. But now, knowing that Jake had broken bro code made that resentment resurface, and he wasn’t sure if it was going away anytime soon (if ever).

“I need to talk to you,” Heeseung reluctantly said.

“Fuck no,” Jake responded with a condescending laugh, shaking his head in disbelief.

Heeseung’s jaw tightened as he pleaded, “Jake, please.”

Jake stared him down, scrutinizing every aspect of him, clearly enjoying Heeseung's desperation. “Why? Y/N told me what happened on Monday. You’re a fucking asshole.”

“You don’t think I don’t know that? That’s why I’m here. Just let me in,” Heeseung said, his patience wearing thin.

“What’s in it for me?” Jake crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. Heeseung could tell he was relishing the sight of him getting so desperate.

“You already got to fuck my girlfriend as many times as you wanted. Don’t you think that’s enough?” Heeseung gritted his teeth, his voice tight with anger.

Jake rolled his eyes but opened the door, letting Heeseung in. “You know she’s not your girlfriend anymore, right?”

If Heeseung wasn’t so determined to win you back, he would have had no issue punching Jake in the face again. But he needed Jake’s help, so he held back and tried his best it ignore him.

“I need your help,” Heeseung said, crossing his arms and facing Jake.

Jake barely glanced at him as he headed to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of what Heeseung assumed was a protein shake. He started to shake it, more focused on his drink, acting almost as if Heeseung wasn’t even there. “You’re funny if you think I’m going to help you with anything.”

Heeseung sighed once again, watching Jake’s dismissive attitude. God, Jake was such a dick. “I know I fucked up.”

“Yeah? Took you long enough to realize.”

“I need help getting her back.” Jake let out a derisive snort that he didn’t even bother to hide.

“Holy shit, you’re delusional. What makes you think I’d help you?” Jake’s laughter was infuriating, and Heeseung started to regret coming here.

“Jake, I know what I did. I know there’s nothing that can fully make up for it, but I need Y/N back. I’m begging you, man, I need your help.” Heeseung’s pride was at rock bottom, but he didn’t care. If this was what he had to let go of to win back the love of his life, so be it.

“You literally cheated on her. Why the fuck would I help someone who cheated on her try to win her back? You don’t deserve her.” Heeseung couldn’t deny it anymore; he had emotionally cheated on you, whether he intended to or not and it sickened him to realize that he was responsible for your pain.

“I know I don’t deserve her, and I also realize what I did and how I’m responsible for everything. I know now that the last month before we broke up was terrible for her, and I was a complete asshole. I didn’t mean to hurt her; everything just spiraled so quickly that I didn’t have time to process it. I swear I’m not trying to make excuses—there aren’t any. But the last three months have been hell for me. You don’t understand how empty I’ve felt, how much it’s all hurt. Hearing that you two came back together from wherever you guys were fucked me up so badly that I ended up taking it out on you, and I’m sorry for that—it was fucked up. But what I’m trying to say is that this whole summer has made me realize just how much I need her. Seeing her again has only made that clearer. I should have listened to her that night, but I was so blinded by anger about you two that I lost control, and you have no idea how much I fucking regret it. Talking to her last week made me see just how badly I fucked up, and I guess I was too caught up in Karina’s lies to accept the truth. I know I don’t deserve her, but please, I just need one last chance to make things right.” Heeseung’s sincerity was evident in every word, and Jake could tell that this was something Heeseung had been tormenting himself over for a while.

“I don’t know what you want me to do,” Jake said honestly. “I don’t even know how I can help. This is between you two.”

He hadn’t expected Heeseung to lay everything out so openly, and he was a bit taken aback. But Jake still struggled to fully support Heeseung. He knew how miserable and broken you had been after the breakup, and he wasn’t sure he could let you go through something like that again.

“I just need her to know that I’m sorry and to hear me out just once more. I know I don’t deserve it, but please. This was all I thought about this entire week, and I don’t know what else to do. I mean I came all the way over here to you of all people because of how desperate I am. I know you don’t owe me anything, especially after everything, but please, I’m begging you. Help me out, man.” Heeseung’s eyes were filled with desperation, and Jake let out a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration.

“Is Karina still in the picture?”

“Fuck no, and I made sure she understood. She’s literally the worst mistake I ever made, and I should’ve known better. I just didn’t think she’d take it this far, but I swear, there was nothing between us to begin with. She just caught me at a vulnerable time and took advantage of it. I fully acknowledge the mess I made in the month leading up to Y/N and me breaking up, and I know it’s probably too late now, but please, Jake. Y/N is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You of all people should know that, so I can’t just let this go without trying one more time.”

Heeseung couldn’t even lift his head to face Jake anymore, his eyes focused on his trembling fingers. The shame of his actions weighed heavily on him, and admitting it all out loud took a lot out of him.

A few seconds of silence passed, and Heeseung assumed Jake was deliberating. With each passing second, his anxiety spiked, and he desperately wished Jake would say something, anything.

“Fuck, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but okay,” Jake said, his tone heavy with disbelief. Heeseung’s head snapped up, his eyes wide with shock. “There’s no guarantee this will even work, but I’ll try something. Just know that I’m not taking this lightly. If you mess it up again, I’ll fucking kill you. I’m not kidding. The moment I see Karina anywhere near you, you’re dead. I’m only doing this because I know how much you meant to her and how miserable she’s been without you.”

Heeseung’s smile stretched so wide it made his cheeks hurt, but he didn’t care. “Thank you so much. Seriously, thank you, man. I really owe you.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Jake said, rolling his eyes at how excited Heeseung was. “But if Y/N isn’t having it, there’s literally nothing else I can do. So don’t get your hopes up.”

“No, I get it. Seriously, thank you so much. And I’m genuinely sorry for everything. It was fucked up for me to fight you like that.” Heeseung wasn’t sure if things with their friend group would ever return to normal, but he’d be lying if he denied that he missed having his friends around. A small bit of him kind of hoped this might be a step in the right direction of maybe getting everything back to normal.

“Yeah, whatever. I guess I kind of deserved it for sleeping with your girl,” Jake said with a hint of sarcasm.

Okay, maybe Heeseung wasn’t entirely fine with Jake being around like before as he felt one of his eyes twitch in irritation at the reminder of Jake being in your bed all summer, but he pushed the thought aside. “Just don’t make it a habit.”

“We’ll see. Don’t fuck it up.”

Heeseung felt another twitch in his eye. Maybe he wasn’t entirely over the idea of killing Jake Sim.

You had been sort of in a weird state of limbo where it seemed that a part of you was still wallowing in the sadness that came after the whole fight with Heeseung in your apartment but also there was also a part of you that was just kind of irritated with everything and you weren’t sure how to get yourself free from this state.

And it seemed the latter was taking over your current state as you let out a grunt of frustration as you attempted to hit the ball over the net, only for it to get caught and cause you to lose. Shouts of amusement came from across the court as you sneered in annoyance.

“Ha! Dinner’s on you! Oh, princess you fucking suck at this.” Jake was a little too happy about your loss as he giggled around the court.

Sweat drenched the both of you as the setting sun’s heat blazed relentlessly down the two of you. “You know that I’m usually good! You’re just better today I guess.”

You sheepishly shrugged before chugging your water from your water bottle on the side, the cold liquid instantly quenching your thirst. You were so ready to leave and get food.

“You just got unlucky that Sunghoon wasn’t here. There’s no doubt he’d be buying dinner. I’ve never seen someone worse at pickleball than he is.” You both let out a small laugh thinking about your mutual friend and his lack of athleticism.

"Yeah, honestly, I know he said he was sick or something, but I bet he just said that to dodge paying for dinner," you muttered, tossing your keys at Jake after packing up your paddle and balls. "You're driving, though."

He caught the keys without protest, shrugging as he followed you to the car. After unlocking it, he slid into the driver’s seat, immediately grimacing. “Jesus, what the fuck is this seat positioning?”

“Leave me alone, it’s my car,” you rolled your eyes, watching as he adjusted the seat to his liking.

“Too nice of a car for such a shitty driver like you,” he snorted, making you gasp in offense.

But before you could fire anything back, he quickly switched the subject. "So, who's Ryujin going on a date with tonight?"

"Some new European exchange student, I think his name’s Armand? Not sure, but I’m pretty sure he’s French."

"Where the hell is she finding all these European guys?" Jake shook his head.

Pickleball was usually a doubles match with you, Jake, Sunghoon, and Ryujin, but Sunghoon had bailed, claiming he was sick (though you weren’t convinced), and Ryujin was off on her date.

"I think he's in her finance class—or at least that’s what Yujin said. But yeah, she clearly has a type," you snorted, sending Ryujin a quick text to see how the date was going.

"That’s an understatement. I’m surprised she got over Louis that fast. And how the hell does Yujin still know everything about everyone despite being abroad for a whole semester?"

The circle you and your family had always been surrounded by was small, a natural outcome of the exclusive lifestyle the upper echelon of society led—one not easily accessible to just anyone. This circle was even tighter at your school, where everyone with status seemed to gravitate. As soon as someone new entered the fold, it took only a few days for word to spread, and soon enough, everyone knew everything about them, especially if they came from a similarly privileged background. So it was no surprise that even after studying abroad in Italy for 6 months, Yujin still managed to stay in the loop.

“You know you don’t actually have to be on campus to keep up with everything,” you sighed, rolling your eyes.

It was frustrating, sometimes even invasive, to know that every move you made was watched and analyzed, but it seemed to be the price you and your friends paid for the lives you led.

Jake hummed in agreement, and for a few moments, the car was uncharacteristically quiet. It was unusual—Jake was never one to keep his mouth shut, so his silence could only mean one thing.

"Ugh, what?" you groaned, turning your phone off and shifting your focus to his profile.

Jake shot you a brief look of confusion before turning his attention back to the road. "What?"

"Just spit it out." You knew all too well that when Jake went quiet, it meant he was holding back something important—and more often than not, it wasn’t good news.

He gave you another glance, this one doing nothing to ease the knot forming in your stomach, before letting out a long sigh. "So, the other day, someone came to see me."

You raised an eyebrow, sensing that he was trying to drag this out. It couldn’t be good. "Oh my God, just tell me already. Who was it?"

Jake took a few more seconds before finally answering. “Heeseung.”

Your ex’s name was the last thing you expected to hear. “What?”

“Yeah, someone knocked, and when I opened the door, there he was, just standing there.” Jake’s slow pace was driving you insane—you just wanted him to get to the point.

“Just tell me what he wanted. Did he try to fight you again? Because I swear to God—”

“No! No, it wasn’t anything like that. He didn’t come to start anything; he just asked for a favor.” Jake nervously bit his lip, his fingers drumming against the steering wheel. He clearly didn’t want to tell you what Heeseung was really after.

“Jake, just get to the fucking point. What did he ask for?”

“Okay fine, he wanted me to talk to you about maybe hearing him out again.” Jake grimaced as he revealed Heeseung's request, sensing that the silence on your end was not a good sign. “Ugh, please Y/N, say something.”

You didn’t know if you should be fuming or surprised. Maybe both. “What did you say?”

Your calm tone caught Jake off guard as he turned into the Thai restaurant you’d chosen for dinner, parking before facing you. “Okay, you can’t be mad, but I agreed.”

Your mouth opened in protest, anger filling your eyes, but he rushed on before you could interrupt. “Just listen. You know me—I wouldn’t agree to something like this, especially with him, unless I really thought he deserved it. After I listened to him, I could see how genuine he was. I know he was a dick on Monday, but he came to me desperate and genuinely sorry. He wouldn’t have approached me of all people if he wasn’t serious.I know how much he hurt you, but I also see how unhappy you are without him. This might not be the worst thing for you two. Plus, Karina’s definitely out of the picture—Heeseung looked furious talking about her and promised he wouldn’t associate with her again.”

You processed everything slowly, staring at Jake. “He hurt me so bad,” was all you could manage as you shook your head, struggling to accept what your best friend was telling you.

Jake’s eyes softened at your reaction. “I know, Y/N. He’s still a total asshole, but deep down, you know that not having him around hurts even more. I didn’t promise him anything, and I won’t ever force you to talk to him. Honestly, if I had my way, I’d keep him far away from you. But I know you, and I see how badly all this unresolved feeling is fucking with you. I don’t want that for you. So just know this is an option. It doesn’t have to be now, or next week, or even this month. But if you ever feel ready to talk to him again—especially now that it seems like you both understand what happened—he’s willing to apologize. I’ll even be there with you if you want.”

Jake was right, and you hated that. Deep down, you knew this unresolved pain would eat you alive. Heeseung had always been part of your life, and having him ripped away, even for just a couple of months, was agonizing. You didn’t know if you could just cut him out completely, so you slowly nodded. “Okay.”

Heeseung honestly had little faith that Jake would keep his promises, but he still held onto a sliver of hope. Yet, as the weeks passed with no word from you, that hope began to dwindle. After a month had gone by without any communication, he was on the verge of accepting that he had ruined the most important thing in his life. Just as he was about to let it go, fortune finally smiled on him: he spotted you outside, nervously biting your lip as you waited for his class to end. A grin spread across his face the moment your eyes met, and he walked toward you.

“Hey,” he greeted softly.

His smile made your heart race, and it was annoying to realize that he still had that effect on you after everything that had happened. “Hey, I was wondering if you were busy. I think I’m ready to talk.”

Heeseung mentally noted to give Jake the biggest thank you ever. Despite his doubts about Jake's ability to follow through, he couldn't be more grateful to be proven wrong.

“Yeah, of course. This is my last class of the day,” he said, eagerly nodding as you both walked out of the building.

“Oh great, I wasn’t sure about your schedule, so I was just hoping I got lucky and you were free.” The awkward tension between you was palpable. “Do you want to grab lunch? I can drive if you didn’t.”

“Yeah, that sounds perfect. Jay drove us today, but I’ll just text him that he doesn’t have to worry about me.” Heeseung couldn’t help the smile spreading across his face. It was amazing how much your presence lifted his spirits. You were like a ray of sunshine, and just being able to look at you felt pretty fucking incredible.

You shot him a small smile before nodding, leading him to your car. “Okay, perfect.”

The ride to the restaurant was quiet, with barely any words exchanged until you both placed your orders.

Knowing that silence would make everything feel pointless, you mustered the courage to clear your throat and initiate the conversation. “Jake told me you really wanted to talk to me again.”

Heeseung nodded without hesitation. “Yeah, I’m not going to lie, I really didn’t think he’d actually help, but I’m so glad he did. I hope you didn’t feel forced or anything—that’s the last thing I want. If you ever feel that way during this conversation, I would completely understand if you just walked away.”

You nodded, recognizing the sincerity in his words. It gave you reassurance about his intentions. “I wasn’t forced or anything, but it did take some time. Honestly, I didn’t want to hear you out again, especially since last time ended badly. But I’ve had time to think, and I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to do this, at least for myself, to move forward from everything.”

“I’m really glad you gave me a chance to talk to you again. Y/N, I know this might not mean much to you, but I truly want to say I’m sorry.” Heeseung sighed before continuing, “I’ve had time to reflect on everything, and I’ve realized that what I did was unfair to you and hurt you in ways I never intended. None of this was your fault, and I’m so sorry for putting you through that.”

Hearing those words felt like a wave of relief washed over your aching heart. It was as if you had been yearning to hear him acknowledge your pain, and his sincere apology felt like a crucial step toward healing. Yet, one lingering question held you back.

“Why did you do it?” you asked softly, almost afraid to voice it. You noticed Heeseung’s eyes soften at your words.

He sat in silence, contemplating your question. Why had he abandoned you during the last month of your relationship?

“I’m not sure,” he blinked, his brow furrowing in distress. “I know that’s not a good enough answer, but honestly, I don’t even think I understand it myself. I really don’t want this to sound like an excuse, but I didn’t realize what was happening until it was too late. That project consumed so much of my time, and unfortunately, that meant spending all those hours with Karina. It became a routine, and I thought it would help me finish the class with a good grade. I never stopped to consider if Karina had ulterior motives, and I’m so sorry—I never thought about how this would affect you.”

You were unsure how to process his words, but you appreciated his honesty and let him continue. “I didn’t mean to blow you off or prioritize the project, which ended up meaning prioritizing Karina over you. That was never my intention. I hope you understand that I never saw her as a replacement or thought she was better than you in any way, especially not romantically. I swear nothing happened between us until after you left for your trip. Even then, I was just so angry, and she happened to be there. She was only an outlet for my frustration, and I know that’s probably not what you want to hear, but I can’t deny that something happened. I just need you to know that aside from the physical, there was nothing else with her.”

Heeseung grimaced as he admitted all this. The weight of his actions felt unbearable, and when he saw your face—so sad, struggling to hold it together—it made him feel even worse. He hated that he was the cause of your pain.

You nodded slowly, your chest tightening as you absorbed his words and another sigh left your mouth. “That last month was so unbearable for me. It was literally hell. You have no idea how many nights I spent blaming myself, thinking I drove you to another girl. But what hurt even more was the aftermath. I’ve known you for so long, and I never realized how much you meant to my life until you were just… gone. I felt so lost without you.”

“It was the same for me. Y/N, you’ve been the love of my life since we were kids. You’ve always been my dream and literally everyone around us knows how much you’ve always meant to me. I’ve dated around and hooked up with other people but at the end of the day, I just kept coming back to you. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted. You’re my home. That’s why I had to take this chance—to see you again, to beg you to hear me out one last time.” His voice trembled, and a tear slipped down your cheek as you felt the weight of his desperation. Your heart ached, torn between the pain of the past and the flicker of hope in his eyes.

He reached over to take your hand in his, the warmth of his familiar touch sending a jolt through you. A small, hopeful smile broke through his anxiety. “I love you, Y/N. I truly believe you’re it for me. But if you need me to let you go, I’ll do it. I’d do anything to see you happy.”

“Heeseung…” The words barely escaped your lips before tears started streaming down your cheeks. You couldn’t hold back your emotions, even in this crowded place. His confession pierced through the defenses you had built, reaching deep into the empty spaces you didn’t even know existed. You remembered all the pain he had caused, the scars still fresh, and yet, despite everything, he was still your Heeseung. Your heart ached with the undeniable truth that he was your destined other half, and you couldn’t bring yourself to let him go completely.

In that moment, amidst the whirlwind of your emotions, the right path became unmistakably clear. You took a deep breath, feeling the weight of your feelings shift into something resolute. With trembling hands, you squeezed his. This wasn’t just about forgiveness; it was about embracing the possibility of healing together. “I can’t let you go, not now,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. “Let’s find our way back.”

No one had ever warned you how difficult it truly was to rebuild something broken, even with someone you’d known your entire life. But now, standing on the other side of that struggle, as you watched the pieces of your relationship with Heeseung slowly fall back into place, you realized that every effort had been worth it. The awkward silences, the tentative steps, and the raw vulnerability—it had all led to this unexpected peace. Months ago, you would’ve laughed if someone told you not only that you’d be back together, but that you’d be more in love with Heeseung than ever before. Yet, against all odds, here you were—more sure of him, more connected, and somehow, more in love than you ever thought possible.

It had been two weeks since that lunch, two weeks since you both decided to give things another shot. Although hesitation still hung between you, trust was slowly rebuilding, and you could feel the progress with every passing day. The real breakthrough came when you got solid proof that Karina was no longer a looming threat. It seemed that Heeseung’s rejection hit her harder than anyone expected, leading her to pack up and flee to her family’s summer home in Lake Como. Word spread quickly that she was taking a semester off to “heal” from all the so-called negative toxicity, but honestly, you couldn’t care less. And it seemed that it wasn’t just you—everyone in your circle seemed to be rejoicing the second her plane left the tarmac, collectively exhaling as though they’d been holding their breath for months. Her departure felt like the final nail in the coffin of a drama that had dragged on far too long, and for the first time in a while, you felt truly free from the chaos.

You and Heeseung had agreed to take things slow, both afraid to fuck up the fragile foundation of your newly rekindled relationship. While you often found yourself holding back more than you were used to, the fresh start was also exciting, like falling in love all over again. The honeymoon phase was in full swing, and honestly, you were soaking it up. So much so that it seemed your entire friend group—finally restored, thank God (you were sure you’d even seen Jay shed a tear when he was reunited with Sunghoon)—was playfully revolting at how inseparable you and Heeseung had become. But despite the jokes, everyone was genuinely thrilled to see you two back together. Even the soft launch on Instagram stirred enough commotion that your mom called, confused. But you didn’t care about anyone’s reactions, because for the first time in a long time, you were truly happy.

“I’m surprised your little purse dog isn’t with you,” Yujin’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts as she appeared out of nowhere, making you jump.

“What?” You shot her a confused look.

“Heeseung! He’s like your own little purse dog these days. I don’t think I’ve seen you two apart since you got back together,” she teased, giving you a smug grin before snatching your drink from your hand and taking a big swig.

You snatched it right back, rolling your eyes. “That is not true!”

But the grin on your face betrayed you—you knew exactly what she meant.

Your half-hearted attempts to deny her claims were cut short when yet another voice chimed in, startling you once again. "Nah, Yujin's right. You two are capital C clingy."

"Stop sneaking up on me!" you groaned, shaking your head at both Ryujin and Yujin. They, of course, found your irritation hilarious. Before you could protest further, Ryujin also reached over and grabbed your drink, taking a long sip without hesitation.

"Oh my God, just take it!" you exclaimed, shaking your head in disbelief. You turned to grab a fresh cup, already resigned to making yourself another drink.

"But seriously, where is Heeseung?" Ryujin asked, glancing around the packed house, her eyes scanning the crowd for your boyfriend.

Jake had thrown a party to celebrate Karina’s dramatic exit, and it seemed like everyone you knew had shown up. His place was absolutely massive so it was insane to see the entire place bursting with people, not a single corner empty.

You shrugged as you added ice to your drink. "Not sure, I saw Jay dragging him out to the pool. I think they’re playing beer pong. You guys do realize we haven’t been together every second, right?”

Yujin scoffed. "You sure about that?t At least from what I’ve been seeing I’m having a hard time believing that."

“Yeah, babe, I don’t think there’s been a single day this week you haven’t been with him,” Ryujin added. But when she noticed a slight frown tugging at your lips, she quickly backpedaled. “But that’s not a bad thing! You guys are back together, and honestly, you seem so much happier and more in love. We’re happy for you.”

Yujin nodded in agreement. “Yeah, it’s cute. Almost sickeningly so. But seriously, we’re all just glad you two are happy again.”

Right on cue, you felt a familiar arm wrap around your waist from behind. You knew instantly who it was. “Aww, that’s so sweet, Yujin. Glad we have your support,” Heeseung teased, reaching out to fist-bump her.

"Were you out playing beer pong?" you asked, glancing up at Heeseung.

He nodded with a grin. "Yeah, Sunghoon and I absolutely annihilated Jay and Jake. Those two suck every single time, but they keep teaming up like they’ve got something to prove. Not that I’m complaining—it just means we keep winning. The loser had to admit the other’s dog was better, and Sunghoon had Jake practically in tears, saying Gaeul was superior to Layla. It was almost cruel. Layla’s literally upstairs, and he ran right up to apologize to her."

Ryujin snorted. "You guys are such kids. What kind of punishment even is that?"

"Hey, I’ll have you know that when it comes to Gaeul, I’d put my fucking life on the line for her!" Sunghoon appeared out of nowhere, clearly having overheard the mention of his beloved dog.

"Yeah, don’t mess with his dog. It’s, like, actually serious for him," Heeseung added, backing up his friend with a smirk.

You couldn’t help but smile. It felt so good to have everyone back together, the easy banter flowing like it always had. The boys, especially, had clearly missed each other. Things were a bit tense between Heeseung and Jake at first, but once Sunghoon and Jay rejoined the group, it felt like no time had passed at all. Of course, Heeseung wasted no time making it clear that you were off-limits now, even threatening that he’d shave Jake’s hair off if he so much as thought about crossing that line—and judging by Jake’s face, it was a threat he took seriously.

As Sunghoon passionately defended his dog, you felt Heeseung's arm tighten around your waist. He leaned in, his breath hot against your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. “I don’t know about you, but I can think of something way better than listening to Sunghoon go on about his dog’s honor,” he whispered, his voice laced with mischief. “How about we check out one of the way-too-many bedrooms upstairs?”

The suggestion came with that familiar cheeky tone, and you didn’t need any convincing. Without a word, the two of you quietly slipped away from the group, who were still caught up in their conversation about pets. Heeseung was right—there were far too many rooms in this house, but luckily you knew exactly where to find a quiet, empty one.

Your body hadn’t even fully crossed the threshold before Heeseung captured your lips with a fervor you hadn’t felt since Hyunjin’s party. When you said that you and Heeseung were committed to taking your relationship slowly, you truly meant it. Sure, the two of you had made it to third base, but you had intentionally held back from rushing into sex, wanting to protect the delicate balance of your relationship. Yet, in that moment, it was clear that neither of you was opposed to going all the way. You both had been holding back for far too long.

Shutting the door behind you, he slammed you flat against the it as his tongue explored inside your mouth. You were panting against his lips as you reached for his clothes. It was obvious neither of you were particularly interested in taking it slow.

“God you’re so fucking hot,” Heeseung didn't hold back his groan as his hand pulled your top over your breasts and cupped one in his hand, groping it as he deepened the kiss. You scratched a hand against the nape of his neck eliciting another low groan from him while his lips trailed down from your lips down to your neck. His touches had never felt better and you were yearning to feel him closer and deeper.

While his lips worked their way down, you didn’t waste any time pulling your leather pants down, revealing the same pair of black thongs that you had been wearing the last time the two of you had sex and Heeseung groaned against your skin once he realized.

“Fuck, you’re going to be the death of me.” You giggled at his response and quickly tugged him towards the bed, leaving behind a trail of clothes as the two of you continued to get rid of your clothes until you were left bare.

Your hands firmly gripped his shoulders once he had finally stripped and you pushed him down on the bed as you also went down on your knees. His mouth was slightly agape as his eyes twinkled at the realization of what was happening.

“I’ve missed your cock so bad,” you purred before letting a wad of spit fall from your mouth and straight on his rock-hard dick.

His eyes instantly rolled back when your hands wrapped themselves around his length and worked their way up and down, adopting a steady tempo. Your eyes never left his face as you held a determined look in your eyes, eager to please him.

“Fuck, just like that,” Heeseung barely managed to pant out as his eyes connected with yours.

You couldn’t hold back a smile. Knowing that your touches had him falling apart like this in pleasure had you growing overcome with lust. There was not a better sight than the one in front of you and you couldn’t break away from witnessing his every reaction even as you slowly started to lick his tip.

He was panting hard as he watched you lick up and down his shaft before swirling your tongue around his sensitive tip that was dripping with precum. And when you sunk down, allowing his dick to find its place in your warm tight throat, his hands went straight to the back of your head, pushing you further down and inciting you to choke on his length.

It’d been a while since you’d deep-throated anything and you felt the tears instantly prick at your eyes as you gagged around his thick cock. You concentrated hard, closing your eyes to ease your throat as you slowly started to bob your head.

Saliva escaped down the corners of your mouth as the tears were now fully escaping your eyes. The filthy sounds of you gagging filled the room along with Heeseung’s deep grunts. His hands were fully pushing your head down as he thrust up, yearning for you to take him deeper. You tried your best to swallow around his as you searched for air, but he was relentless and pushed you until you couldn’t take anymore and had to slap the sides of his thighs for respite.

“Jesus Christ, Heeseung!” You gasped for air before coughing when he finally let you go, realizing how brutal he had been treating your throat.

“Shit, sorry,” his eyes were wide as he reached for your face, pushing your sweat-drenched hair away from your face. “It’s been so long and you felt so good, I’m so sorry-”

“Shut up,” you shook your head as you pushed him back on the bed. You ignored his apologies and quickly got on top of him, ignoring the fact that you had just been brutally choking on your boyfriend’s dick.

You were already dripping wet and Heeseung’s eyes couldn’t take his eyes away from your glistening pussy hovering over his dick. His hands guided themselves to your hips and you slowly teased him as you rubbed the tip of his dick at your entrance.

“Please,” he pleaded desperately and that was all you needed to hear before you slowly sunk yourself down his length.

The two of you let out groans and you couldn’t help but heavily pant as you went lower, feeling him deeper in you. You felt so full that it felt like you could feel him all the way up your throat. Heeseung was massive and despite having loads of experience riding him, every time it felt like almost too much for you as your body felt like it was being stretched beyond its limit.

“Fuck, you’re too big,” you whimpered as you felt your body slumping over his, trying your best to get adjusted to his side.

His mouth found yours as he passionately kissed you while his hands found your breasts, rolling your nipples between his fingers. “You’re taking me so well princess.”

As he praised you, you found yourself slowly attempting to move your hips and before you knew it, you were moaning against his lips as you moved up and down his length. The pleasure was overwhelming and you couldn’t stop. The stretch still stung, but the pleasure that came with it was more than anything you could’ve asked for.

“Heeseung,” you moaned out loudly as his hips thrust up to meet yours, forcing you to feel him deeper.

The room was filled with your wanton moans that didn’t stop chanting his name and the sounds of his balls slapping roughly against your pussy. His grunts were getting animalistic and before you knew it, he had flipped the two of you over changing the position and taking over.

‘Oh my God!” You screeched as he moved your legs to hang over his shoulders, causing the new position to allow him to reach you deeper if that was even possible.

He relentlessly pounded against your sweet spot, “You feel so fucking good. Perfect pussy made just for me.”

His dirty talk had you whimpering and you found yourself reaching down for your clit quickly rubbing it, helping you reach your orgasm faster.

“I’m almost there don’t stop,” you instructed, and with a couple more hard thrusts, you found yourself loudly crying out as you found yourself reaching your peak.

You clung to him tightly as you rode out your orgasm and could feel him twitch inside you before also cumming closely after. He filled you to the brim with his cum as you limply laid there taking everything he gave you. Once he was finished, he slowly pulled out inciting a small whimper from you and you could feel all his cum slowly pouring out of you and down your leg.

Heeseung, seemingly just as worn out as you were, plopped right next to you before pulling you close to him, cuddling you. A huge smile formed on your face as you turned your head to face him and kiss him, someone pounded on the door.

“You two are so fucked for that! You do realize Layla’s room is right next door!”

Bonus:

It was unbelievable how fast time had flown, especially now, standing with all your closest friends in matching caps and gowns. You couldn’t help but marvel at the fact that you’d all made it through college in one piece, still tight-knit as ever. It was almost enough to bring you to tears—if you weren’t so distracted by how uncomfortable your dress had become under your gown. You kept fidgeting, trying to adjust it for a bit of relief.

“Stop wrinkling your dress!” your mother scolded, while busy straightening Jake’s tie.

“But no one’s even going to see the tie under the gown,” Jake whined, only for your mom to shoot him a stern look that silenced him immediately as she returned to perfecting his outfit.

True to her word, your mom had finally gotten Jake head to toe in one of her custom pieces (minus the cap and gown). “I don’t care if anyone sees it or not. You are not wearing one of my designs without it being flawless,” she insisted, focused on making sure everything was perfect.

You could hear the quiet snickers behind you, and without even turning around, you knew Sunghoon and Ryujin were loving every second of this. They had already survived your mother’s meticulous once-over and were now relishing in watching the rest of you squirm under her scrutiny.

"Yeah, come on Jake, stop being so fussy. You should be grateful she's even doing this for you," Heeseung chimed in, grinning. His playful jab at Jake was laced with just enough sweetness to win over your mom—or at least, that was the plan.

Your mom still hadn’t entirely forgiven Heeseung for the disaster he caused at her garden party, and her approval of your rekindled relationship was, at best, tentative. But it was clear she was slowly warming up, especially with the way Heeseung never missed a chance to flatter her.

“Alright, now you look presentable. Don’t you dare mess with it during the ceremony,” your mom finally declared, stepping back to give Jake a final once-over. She then turned her sharp gaze on the rest of you, making sure everyone else met her high standards.

You exchanged a glance with Sunghoon and Ryujin, who were both barely holding in their laughter. They clearly found your mom’s unofficial role as wardrobe enforcer far more amusing from the sidelines.

“Oh, you all look so beautiful,” your mother said, her smile softening in a way you weren’t used to. The warmth in her gaze caught you off guard, and suddenly, the stuffiness of your dress was the last thing on your mind. As your eyes met hers, the reality of the moment hit you—graduation day, surrounded by your closest friends, all of you about to step into the next chapter of your lives. You could feel the emotions welling up, tears prickling at the corners of your eyes as you took in the sight of everyone in their caps and gowns.

Heeseung, as if sensing your shift in mood, gently tugged your hand into his, threading your fingers together. He squeezed your hand and gave you a reassuring smile, grounding you just when you needed it most.

“Come on, let’s take a picture before we leave,” you suggested, grabbing Heeseung's hand and motioning to your friends.

Your group huddled close, arms draped over each other, laughter bubbling up as your mom snapped away on her phone. Heeseung’s arm stayed firmly around your waist, keeping you close while you smiled for the camera. The joy of the moment, the closeness of your friends, felt like the perfect snapshot of how far you had all come.

As soon as the last picture was taken, everyone started to drift toward the stadium for the commencement ceremony. You watched as the crowd began to gather under the soft glow of the setting sun. After a quick hug and goodbye to your mom, you turned to follow your friends toward the entrance gates.

Just before you could step through the gates, Heeseung gently pulled you aside, his fingers brushing your arm. He leaned in close, his breath warm against your ear as he whispered, “I couldn’t have done any of this without you. I’m proud of us.”

His words made your heart swell, emotions bubbling up in a way that almost took your breath away. You looked up at him, your smile soft and full of everything you’d been through together. “I am too,” you whispered back, a mixture of relief and joy filling your chest. “We made it.”

The air was cool, a gentle breeze lifting the corners of your graduation gown as you looked at Heeseung, remembering how uncertain things had once seemed. But now? Everything felt like it was finally falling into place. The obstacles and heartbreak had only made you both stronger.

As the sun began to set, Heeseung took your hand again, just like in the room earlier. This time, though, he brought it to his lips, brushing a light kiss across your knuckles before pulling you closer.

“I love you,” he said quietly, and it wasn’t a grand declaration—just a simple truth that felt completely genuine.

“I love you too,” you answered, your heart full.

Standing there, wrapped in each other’s arms, the future didn’t seem so intimidating anymore. It was uncertain, sure, but with Heeseung beside you, you felt ready for whatever was next.

TAGLIST: @notevenheretbh1 @leov3rse @slut4hee @llvrhee @simjungwon @lhspeachie @sakanelli-afc @rayofsunshineeee @deobitifull @iwaplant @mheretoreadff @farashawhee @skzenhalove @venfl-ifw @jaehoonii @melonvrs @enhastolemyheart @rainyjy @cha0thicpisces @love-be0m @niniissus

#enhypen #enhypen scenarios #enhypen x reader #heeseung #heeseung x reader #heeseung scenarios #enhypen smut #heeseung smut #enhypen imagines #enhypen au #heeseung imagines #fic: psily

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emberuby · 23 days ago

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enha to chase | hyung line

summary: short (smutty) drabbles of enhypen hyung line inspired by chase atlantic songs.

warnings: smut, one-night stand (heeseung), misunderstanding (heeseung), high sex, drunk sex (jay & jake), semi-public sex (jake), infidelity (sunghoon), toxic relationship (sunghoon), angst, unprotected sex, stomach bulge (jay).

note: my two fave boy bands in the world are enhypen and chase atlantic so i decided to join the two. this is my first time writing short drabbles too so this was very unusual but fun. these are just based off the general vibes of the song, so the story might not fully match the lyrics. btw this fic format is inspired by @wh1msic4lwasab1, so credit to their incredible writing 🖤

wc: 1.9k

heeseung — her (phases)

she said "we can do whatever you want, you could fuck me in the back of your car" but i won't ever get to stay with her, 'cause all i ever had was one day with her

Heeseung knew he would regret this day for the rest of his life, but you were so addicting that it was making him act like a moron.

The car was shaking from your rough movements, and the windows were fogging up, both from the heavy breathing and the pouring rain from the outside. Heeseung sat in the back as you straddled his lap and bounced up and down on his cock desperately.

His hands were on your waist, helping you guide your movements, and in all honesty, you weren’t particularly graceful with them.

In the beginning, you were incredible. You were riding him like a wave, and the movement of your hips was making Heeseung see stars, but it was becoming all too exhausting now, trying to keep up with his stamina. You’ve already cum once, and your pussy felt sensitive and puffy, causing your movements to become choppy.

“Slow down, Y/N,” he groaned, having the urge to take control.

You shook your head, making your hair fall on your face. You whined desperately, “Hee…baby. I have to make you cum. Let me.” You then leaned back slightly and rested your hands on his knees in a futile attempt to help you keep going.

Your mind was feeling hazy at the feeling of his cock filling you up, and you were angry at your body as you could feel another orgasm approaching while Heeseung was still not even close.

Before you could keep going, Heeseung swiftly flipped you over so you were on your hands and knees and started roughly slamming into you. Your whines were becoming louder, and you were sure that if anyone were to be passing by, they would hear your obscene noises.

Your face was now pressed against the leather seat, and you cried out as you felt your orgasm wash over you, just a bit before Heeseung spilt his seed inside you, coating your walls with his cum.

You couldn’t believe he did that, given this was only a one-time thing, but it felt so good you couldn’t bring yourself to think straight. Heeseung kept thrusting in and out of you, and you whined from the overstimulation.

Every time he pushed himself inside you, he moved his cum deeper and deeper inside your cunt, and you felt yourself being addicted to the feeling.

You knew you would regret this day for the rest of your life. Heeseung and you both knew you were making a massive mistake.

You were afraid of what was going to happen after the two of you left this car. You agreed with Heeseung to a one-night stand to help relieve your stress, but your relationship would never be the same after this.

Especially as Heeseung was always in love with you, and his heart clenched at the thought you would never be his.

jay — slide (beauty in death)

i don't wanna say that i'm god, but, i'll take you to heaven if you die [...] lying to me baby, make it worth it, make me earn it, they don't deserve you

It was the first time you’d ever gotten high, and you weren’t doing particularly well. You were both sleepy yet also hyper-aware and entirely too horny for your own good. You were sure Jay was embarrassed by how you were acting at the party, but in reality, he found it all too adorable.

“Jaybird,” you remembered telling him as you clumsily grabbed the collar of his shirt. You thought you were whispering, but all of Jay’s friends could hear you.

“Yes, baby?” He said, his palms rubbing over your arms to help soothe you.

“Please,” you said in a desperate voice, clenching your hands on the fabric of his shirt.

“Please what?”

“Please… Please let's get out so you can fuck me. I need you, please. I need your dick,” you whined. Your eyes were practically sparkling with tears, and you didn’t notice the way Heeseung and Sunghoon busted out in laughter at your words.

It was a blur after that, and you remember somehow ending up in an empty bedroom with your clothes gone and Jay’s chest pressed up against your back. His touch felt so soft and soothing, and he held you and kissed you as though you were going to break.

He was always soft with you, but especially now, he was ever so careful and gentle, even in the way he slowly split open your cunt with his throbbing cock. No matter how slowly he went with you, however, you still felt sensitive from how deep inside you he was.

He couldn’t see your face as you lay on your side, but he could tell you were still out of it.

“Ahh…’m sorry, Jay. I’m really sorry for embarrassing you,” you said in between your moans. You loved when he fucked you in this position because you could feel him so intensely.

He placed a kiss on the back of your head and said, “Don’t be stupid now, darling.” He could never be embarrassed by you. If he were honest, he loved how bold you were tonight, as he was used to you being timid when it came to sex.

He had learnt to know the signs of when you got horny, like when you would make puppy eyes at him or when you would clench your legs discreetly, and although he didn’t mind it, he liked this version of you as well.

He reached over to the lower part of your belly and pressed his palms against it, his mind going haywire at the feeling of his cock creating a bulge inside you. It was like you were perfectly made for him.

You gasped as he started quickening his pace. “So good for me, darling,” he grunted as he kept slamming into you. “My sweet thing, you’re doing so well.”

jake — die for me (lost in heaven)

you know how i love it when you ride on me, oh, lord, i'm in the water, take a dive on me [...] good god, she's on the floor, rollin' her eyes at me, oh

It was fucking freezing, but Jake’s body heat was making it ever so slightly bearable. The sounds of your skin slapping against each other were filling the air, and you two had no care in the world as you fucked each other on the sand with the rushing water behind you.

Neither of you was thinking straight. You were both drunk off vodka, sopping wet after a skinny dipping session, and exhausted from the long night. Jake, however, made sure to put a towel underneath you, ever the gentleman that he was.

In fact, he was such a gentleman that he wasn’t patient enough to get you home and had to fuck you right there on the beach.

“It’s fine, princess. Do you really think anyone is up this late?” You remembered him saying.

You were nervous at first and terrified at the prospect of someone coming to catch you, but it didn’t take much convincing for you to get on your knees and start sucking on his cock out in the open.

All Jake had to do was flash his eyes that glinted in the moonlight and tell you how much he wanted you.

Jake could tell how much you enjoyed being out in the open like this. While your mouth was wrapped around him and bobbing up and down desperately, all he could focus on was how flushed your face was and how you were palming at your pussy to give yourself relief. Your eyes were rolled back, and you were taking him deeper than ever.

You were loving it.

You desperately wanted him to finish in your mouth, but Jake felt impatient and pushed you down on the towel, and now here you were grabbing at Jake’s back as he plummeted inside you.

“Fuck, Jakey, just like that,” you moaned as you felt him hit just the right spot within your walls. Your skin felt so cold, but his cock felt so warm inside you. The contrast was making you feel lightheaded.

“You’re such a dirty girl,” he groaned from above as he split you open with his cock. Everything felt so heightened. You weren’t particularly a risk-taker when it came to sex, but Jake loved the exhilaration of moments like these.

He still remembers the time he fucked you at a sleepover at Sunghoon’s place, with Heeseung mere inches away from you two sleeping. He never decided to tell you that Heeseung heard every moment of it, to protect your sensitive heart.

“Fuck, princess, you’re so wet,” he said breathily. “You love it, don’t you? You always act like such an innocent girl, but I know how much it turns you on to think of someone catching us like this, isn’t that right?”

sunghoon — tidal wave (single)

if you don't wanna break his heart, girl, where the fuck is he, then? [...] and i say fuck the rules and let 'em find out but that's just how i'm feelin'

You could feel his breath on your forehead; even though you tried to avoid it, his gaze bore you. He hated when you didn’t look back at him when he was fucking you. He roughly grabbed a handful of your thighs and slammed himself inside you, making you roll your eyes back into your head.

“Hoonie...” you moaned. Your pussy was starting to feel sensitive, and you knew you were close. Sunghoon sucked on his teeth and cupped your chin to make you look up at him.

“Keep your eyes on me, baby,” he whispered. “Either that or I’m not letting you finish. Understand?”

You nodded weakly in response, but God did it hurt to look into his eyes. It made this all feel too real. When his eyes were on you like this, it was a reminder that you could never escape him, no matter how hard you tried.

You always loved him, but God did he hate you. At least that’s what it felt like.

Why else would he hurt you like this? Why else would he tell you he wasn’t ready for a relationship and break your heart repeatedly, just to come crawling back when you finally found someone who loved you back? He wanted you to belong to him, but he could never bring himself to be yours.

But did it really matter how much he hurt you when you always ended up like this? With your legs spread out, your cunt stuffed with his cock, and him plummeting into you so deeply it made you see stars.

He was ruining your life, but you were the pathetic one for letting it happen.

“Did you really think he could replace me?” he said cockily. You hated that question because the obvious answer was no. Jisung was perfect, and you were fucked in the head because even that was never enough for you.

Sunghoon was your dirty little secret. He was an addiction that was slowly killing you.

“Fuck you,” you spat. “Why would I want someone to replace you when you’re such an asshole? Jisung treats me like a princess.”

You used all your strength to muster up those words coherently, as it was becoming harder to think with the thrusts of his hips intensifying. You could see the sweat dripping down his chest.

He reached his hand down, and you yelped as you felt his cold finger pads pinch your clit, sending an electric shock up your spine. You loved how good he made you feel. Nothing could ever compare to how well he knew your body.

“You don’t want to be treated like a princess, though, isn’t that right? Deep down, you know you’re a whore, and you deserved to be punished like one.” His words were rough, but all too true.

Tears started welling in your eyes, and you didn’t know if it was because of how overstimulated you were becoming or because his words were hitting too close to home.

“Tell me this, Y/N. If he’s so fucking perfect, where exactly is he? Huh?” He loved fucking with your head. He was the one who pleaded with you to get in bed with him, and now he was punishing you for it.

#heeseung smut #jay smut #jake smut #jake sim smut #sunghoon smut #enhypen #enhypen x reader #enhypen smut #enhypen drabbles #enhypen hard hours

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wrioluvr · 6 months ago

Text

flirty playboy x mature male reader

this stupid ass meme had been on my mind forever and i realised how funny it would be to have a slutty playboy who just sleeps with anyone to seriously pine over a more mature, secure guy who doesn't fall for any of his shallow charms and tricks.... here are just some blurbs of their dynamic (˵ ¬ᴗ¬˵)

his name is roman. he's a little toxic, but he just wants to be loved.

cw: some smut, top male reader

it all started with a little night out. you didn't do those often, due to devoting most of your time towards work and earning a stable career, but finishing this particularly gruelling assignment called for a celebration. at the bar, dancing with your friends, a good-looking man with a playful glint in his eyes approached you full of bravado. he told you how handsome you were, and had been eyeing you from across the room for a while now. but from a single glance, you could tell he was the type to break hearts. beach-blonde dyed hair, a tight fitting tank top revealing his muscular build, an eyebrow piercing, the way his mouth curled up so subtly into a little smirk.... he was everything you knew to avoid getting serious with. but a little hookup couldn't hurt, right? you deserved a little fun.

and it didn't hurt you at all. a few failed relationships had made you wise beyond your years, knowing to easily seperate the good guys from the bad. you knew your self-worth. roman, on the other hand, was absolutely smitten. no other man had fucked him THIS good, gave him such gentle aftercare, and even let him stay as long as he needed. the way you so effortlessly lifted his legs up to thrust in and out of him at a rhythmic pace, or fondling his tits and squeezing his nipples softly while you hit it from the back, or tenderly running your fingers down his spine, arching it sensually.... he loved it all. it was clear to him that you prioritised his pleasure as much as your own, and it showed in how he orgasmed several times before you even came in him once, panting breathlessly while wearing the sluttiest expression of his life. it was nothing like any of the men he had sex with before. afterwards, you let him stay the night in a guest room, and even brewed a cup of coffee for him in the morning.

roman was damn near tears when you offered to drop him off at his house before you headed off to work. if he was being honest with himself, his insecurities were the root of his constant need for sexual intimacy, so being treated with genuine kindness for once was new to him.

"is dropping you off here alright?" you ask, turning into the road of his apartment complex.

"y-yeah...." he looks out the window, unsure how to look you in the eyes.

"okay. thanks for last night. stay safe." your words carried an air of finality to them, like you were so sure the two of you would never cross paths again. he didn't like that.

"uh, uh......" he stuttered, all his usual flirtatiousness thrown out the window as he couldn't meet your gaze. "could i... get your number?"

your friendly smile froze on your face. "uhhhh.... sorry, i'm not really looking for anything serious right now."

he quickly regained his composure, charm turned up to the max. shifting his tank top so more of his chest was exposed and you could notice his nipples protruding, roman whispered in a low tone, "that's okay! we can just be casual... and fuck anytime you like." a wink. a hand on your thigh.

"jeez... okay, no offense, but i've heard rumours from my friends that you're a bit of a... playboy. i'm not interested in being your toy, sorry."

roman's face flushed in embarrassment, knowing what you said was true. except the part on him seeing you as a toy. that was untrue. he could feel a warmth growing from the pit of his stomach at the thought of spending more time with you. were these... butterflies?

maybe begging would work.

"okay fine, i am a bit of a player... but please, please, pleaseeeeeee.... let's be in contact, okay? as friends?" roman sniffled pathetically, shaking your shoulder in desperation. he needed to be in your presence. why weren't his usual maneating tactics working?!?!

"alright. here you go. just don't spam me or anything, okay? i gotta go for work. see you." you sigh, a little exasperated but choosing not to let it show. he immediately lit up, typing your number in his contacts and saving many hearts next to your name. you prayed your acts of basic human decency wouldn't cause him to catch feelings. you needed to focus on your job right now.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

3:02pm

[romanbabyxx]

hiiiiiii

[romanbabyxx]

i know you said not to spam you but like

[romanbabyxx]

i miss u

[romanbabyxx]

can we meet up at the bar for drinks or something like that? please?

3:10pm

you check the messages on your phone, rolling your eyes and ignoring them. he was probably sending this text to at least three other guys right now. he had a history of cheating, based on what you heard from your friends. you weren't going to be another one of his victims.

5:35pm

[romanbabyxx]

are u ignoring me?

[romanbabyxx]

im sorryyyyyyyy

[romanbabyxx]

pls hit me back when ur free

7.30 pm

[name]

sorry, just got off work. will be super busy this week, so not free. mb.

[romanbabyxx]

oh, its okay! next week then?

[name]

i'll see

this went on for a few weeks, you constantly evading his invitations, being polite and professional, never too intimate over text. roman was starting to get fed up. he's so used to getting everything he wants, he doesn't know what to do when he actually has to work for the one he desires. he actually hadn't hooked up with anyone since your one night stand, but you didn't believe that.

roman was at his wits' end. he could only think of one final plan to get your attention.

trying to make you jealous.

over the next week, he hooked up with any and everyone he met in the bar, not bothering to keep his slutting around discreet. he wanted you to hear the rumours. he wanted you to feel a sense of unease within your very being. he wanted you to feel possessive. he wanted you, to want him. the whole time, even as he was getting fucked, he could only imagine you caressing him, holding him close, loving him.

his deeds didn't go unnoticed. your friends told you about it, yet you didn't feel anything in the slightest. you were right, after all... he forgot about you within a week and moved on to whichever poor man he would leave high and dry next.

the next time you bumped into him at the bar, roman was his usual, party-loving self, excitedly slinging an arm around you, a drink in hand. his plan had to work, surely? you would be begging to have him back. but yet, when he offhandedly (yet so intentionally) mentioned how much dick he had been getting the past week, anticipating your change in expression, nothing happened. "oh. good for you." was all you said.

he sputtered, flustered by your calm demeanour. didn't you care? at all?! "but.... but.... aren't you jealous? that i've been hooking up with other guys?!"

you stare at him, a genuine quzzical expression plastered across your face. "why would i be? it's not like we're dating or anything. it was just a one time thing."

your words hit like a knife through his heart. he clutched his chest dramatically, a pout forming on his lips. "i'll be faithful! i promise!" his words came out more desperate than he intended. he felt so vulnerable, so naked, yet you were the face of serenity. your unimpressed eyes stared through his soul, as if you were scrutinising his very core. he knew you could heal him, make him feel loved, but he was starting to doubt there was any possibility you would feel the same.

"i'm sure that's what you said to the last guy you cheated on."

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

i intended for this to be lighthearted but why was it actually kinda depressing tbh

#male reader #dom male reader #top male reader #bottom male character #sub male character #playboy x male reader #wrioluvr: roman #i admire ppl who can just write pure smut with graphic descriptions coz i end up spiraling into a full mini plot everytime crying emoji

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kookslastbutton · 8 months ago

Text

Guilty Pleasures ༓ jjk, kth (m) | chapter ii

✒ Summary: Three years of being Seoul's power couple earns you nothing but a big fat divorce settlement and your face plaster on every gossip column around town. You're angry, hurt, and desperately want to move on, but worst of all? You're still in love with the man who started the whole mess, even though the most he can ever see you as is a friend. The renowned actor you've hired to be your company's new endorser seems to have a soft spot for you though. He's easy on the eyes, you'll admit, but who actually wants a divorcee like yourself? It's unrealistic really.

pairing: ex-husband ceo!jungkook x ceo!reader, actor!taehyung x ceo!reader

genre/AU: angst, smut, fluff, loverstoexesto ?, coworkers2?, unrequited love

Word count: 4.5k

Warnings: oc and jk are both 30, Taehyung is 32, swearing, fighting, confrontation, tornado of emotions, mentions of alcohol consumption, mentions of sexism in the media and business world, public shaming (both direct and indirect), morally grey characters, mentions of toxic relationships, mentions of abandonment issues, mentions of therapy, attempts to self-regulate but reader is pissed, mentions of self-blame though oc knows its not entirely her fault, mentions of defamation charges, JK is just 🤬 while KTH is 😇

playlist: Unkiss Me, Apologize, Hate That I Love You, etc.

a/n: Woah okay....so had I fun writing this, even though it took me a hella long time to decide whether to continue the story as a series or not 🫣 Anyway I altered the summary slightly from chapter one (and updated for consistency purposes), but it doesn't change my overall plans! As you read this chapter, I hope you will be able to see my vision (I'm nervous af! haha)! Enjoy 🥰 (edited but pls forgive me for any oversights...my typos are ridiculous)

series masterlist | next >>

You’re seated in a wide sofa chair, surrounded by four blank walls, and the gentle sound of water tricking from a faux rock waterfall. Every element of the space is carefully integrated as a means to calm you. Yet it doesn't calm you in the slightest. Your hands are clammy. Muscles tense with the adrenaline spiking through your veins. It doesn’t help that you’ve been running on nothing but black coffee all week either, refusing to eat until the first promo shoot with your company’s new endorser was launched.

A natural in front of the camera, Kim Taehyung was able to speed the process up, yet it didn’t stop the massive dark circles from forming under your eyes. This morning, he'd told you they were unnoticeable but you've seen how you look in the mirror, and they're anything but unnoticeable. Still, you find his gesture to soothe sweet. Thankfully, your new partnership has been smooth sailing which is quite a blessing considering the disaster he nearly walked into.

Yes. You’re referring to that disaster in particular. When, in some desperate last-minute attempt for validation, you threw yourself into the arms of your ex-husband.

More like fixed the collar of his shirt and whoops, slid right on his dick…again.

What is wrong with you?

You’ve been asking yourself the question far too many times. You’d think being a hot-shot CEO of a million-dollar tech company would make you like titanium, resilient as finely pounded steel but no; you're just barely keeping yourself together. You regret your rash decision that day, you regret ever marrying Jeon Jungkook, and you regret ever giving in to your stupid feelings.

That’s why you’re here now, waiting in the office of your therapist’s private practice, hands restless in your lap. You’ve been seeing Melody for just over two months since your divorce was finalized, ready to move on; trying to, more like.

‘JeonX CEO Jeon Jungkook’s ex-wife compensated $1.8 billion in divorce’

‘South Korea’s Golden It couple split with ex-wife taking half the company revenue’

These are the lovely words that greet you from your phone screen.

You have the urge to grab your special red ballpoint pen from your bag and scribble out the entire paragraph, except it’s not a printed gossip magazine— it’s a newspaper column on the internet. Instead, you close out the pesky tab on your phone and reply to its sender.

Chim 🐥: can you believe this crap they’re saying about you?! It's no shit you were given a hefty divorce settlement. You brought in half the income! They’re making you look like some kind of gold digger. I swear if I ever lay my eyes on that pretty ex-husband of yours, I will end him! 😡 [sent at 5:06 pm]

Park Jimin, your childhood best friend, sends you a follow-up text when you don’t immediately reply to the news articles he forwarded over. He’s been extremely overprotective of you lately and especially pissed at how the media’s been portraying you, while Jungkook is seemingly getting a free ride. He’s always had an axe to grind with your ex-husband, to be honest, the divorce gives him only more reason to hate him.

You: Thanks for your concern Chim, but nothing they say surprises me anymore. If you don’t mind, can you stop sending these to me? [sent at 5:12 pm]

You hope your message doesn’t read as cold or dismissive. Jimin’s concern for you is a light in a dark place, but you don’t really want to be reminded of the amount of slandering articles still targeted towards you.

Gone are the days when the public saw you as a powerful woman in business, the one to watch, or the CEO of the fastest-growing startup in the last ten years. You're now simply Jeon Jungkook’s conniving ex-wife; as if you’ve merely seduced him for his money and ran when the going was good.

Of course, the whole situation is skewed to his side; half the world is in love with him after all, and that includes the few lingering reporters who've been practically salivating three feet from you at any given chance, hoping to get an exclusive “inside look”. Your marriage was a sham, you wanted to scream, a mutual business transaction.

Too bad rather than an increase in status, resources, and market share, you gained a pile of twisted, unwarranted emotions and regrets.

“I apologize for the wait Ms. __."

The door swings open as your therapist rushes into the room. She stops at her desk to retrieve last week’s session notes, then takes a seat in the chair adjacent to you with crossed legs.

“It’s okay,” you assure, straightening your posture. “I understand how crazy busy the day can get. It wasn't a long wait anyway."

Melody gives a small smile and jots a few words on her notepad. “Thank you for understanding. How are you doing this week?”

You take a deep breath. "Tired," you respond, "especially this week at work. It's like as soon as I wrap up one project, there's another jumping out from nowhere." You used to be ahead of the game. Now you're barely surviving.

"That's right," she hums. "Last week you mentioned having to attend a charity gala soon. Would you like to start there today?"

Crap, you're suddenly reminded that you have to pick up your gown by 7 pm tonight. You entertained the idea of not going to the gala at all, but that would do you no favors in the end. Given your situation, you can't skip out on such an important charity event.

"Sure," you nod. "The Winter Gala's tomorrow night, actually. It's funny how I used to look forward to it every year, being an opportunity to network and catch up with my peers. I can't say I feel the same thrill this time around."

"Because of the divorce you mean?"

"Exactly. Being the CEO of one of the largest software corporations in the world, my ex-husband's influence far exceeds my own. So whether out of loyalty or political agenda, anyone who's anyone will be on his side of the room. I'm gonna end up being that one awkward person in the corner in a far too expensive Dior gown who no one wants to dance with." You nervously chuckle out the last sentence.

Melody opens her mouth to respond, yet stops when she notices you're not quite finished.

"It'll be the first time seeing my ex-husband after months of no contact too. I guess that's what I'm looking forward to the least."

When you think about it, the most you've seen of Jungkook is his face appearing on the massive screens downtown. He's been featured in at least a dozen interviews lately, teasing a brand-new product his company's planning to release in the spring. Seems he's doing well.

"What you feel is valid Ms. __." Melody seeks to assure you. "In the past, you used to go to these events with Jungkook right? He provided you with a sense of safety, as you did for him, no doubt. I wonder if it's a lack of consistency and belonging that worries you, more than it is about seeing your ex-husband and your peers. Companionship too, of course."

"I suppose that makes sense, but it never used to be this way." Your voice raises to match your sudden argumentativeness. "I used to be very comfortable in my own skin. I used to be confident going to these events alone, long before Jungkook came into the picture."

You pause to take a breath before continuing.

"When Jungkook became CEO of his family's software company, JeonX, he was steps away from being bought out by both our competitors, so a partnership was proposed. We married at 27 as nothing more than two ambitious, rising leaders in business. Neither of us was after love or romance when our careers were at stake."

"But then that changed for you," your therapist carefully observes. "Combined, you both held the largest share of the tech market. You and Jungkook were also in an extremely intimate relationship, yet treated it as a business contract. Unfortunately, those don't always come out clean in the wash. It appears to me that while you gave him three honest years of your life, he stole those three years from you."

The words take a moment to sink in; Jungkook stole three years from you. It conflicts with what you want to believe, though from the bottom of your heart, you know she's right.

"I feel so...guilty. I hate that I fell for him, and I hate that I'm struggling this much to let him go." As you tear up, Melody hands you a tissue from the side table with an empathetic gaze. You mouth a thank you and gently dab your eyes with the soft fabric.

"I'd give yourself some grace Ms. __. But if I may ask, what about Jungkook?" she gently probes. "Do you think he feels the same?"

"No...," you say with remorse, shaking your head. "He's moved on."

Melody remains silent for as long as you need in the moments following, cautious to follow your lead. The last thing a therapist should do is rush their patient through the session, so she sits patiently and waits for your go.

"Sorry," you finally say. "We should continue."

"No need for apologies," she replies. "Take your time."

It takes a good minute or two longer of sitting in your car before you can fully compose yourself. As usual, your session with Melody was intense and insightful, but it was far too short. You're gripping the wheel with both hands when her final words of the session echo through your head: "Give yourself some grace; blaming yourself won't do any good."

Seemingly simple advice, yet tough to follow when you constantly feel responsible for the mess you're in. Yes, even though Jungkook has the bigger end of the stick, you made your share of mistakes too. You should have looked into other options when you found out your competitors were looking to buy out JeonX instead of eloping with their CEO.

Just what were you thinking __? you harshly scold yourself. You were trying to protect your company. You both were. Too bad you placed the cart in front of the horse.

Forcing yourself to take a slow, deep breath, your eyes widen in alarm when you catch the time on the clock— 6:38 pm. Fuck! The boutique that's holding your gown for tomorrow's gala is closing in twenty minutes. Without a moment to spare, you yank the seatbelt and slam your foot on the gas.

"Good evening Ms. __." A young woman, fitted in a black pencil skirt and white blouse, greets you with a faint bow as soon as you step foot into the posh boutique.

"Hello, Hana," you refer to the young lady by name with a smile. "I'm terribly sorry to be coming in this late. I came by to pick up the gown I sent in for alterations two weeks ago. The event's tomorrow and I know the shop will be closed for the day."

Knowing the exact dress you're referring to, Hana responds with a soft tone, "Please don't worry Ms. __. We have the gown ready." She disappears to the back of the shop to retrieve it.

As you wait, your mind drifts to memories of last year's gala. You had worn a vibrant, gold gown that evening, slightly risky with a low neckline. Jungkook liked it though, as he wore a matching gold vest himself. You can imagine how crazy the press went when you both set foot on the scene, arms linked and appearing to have coordinated your attire perfectly.

Every investor at the gig wanted to be your friend that night, anxiously pushing through the crowds to speak to you. One of them nearly split your dress in two, as he had accidentally stepped on your gown after one too many drinks. You recall Jungkook scolding the man before turning his full attention to you, making sure you were alright. You consider this to be the first time you truly started looking at him as your husband, a feeling of warmth blooming inside you.

How foolish you were to let that feeling grow.

You're attending the gala alone this year, without him.

Possessing no desire to call attention to yourself this year, you've chosen a rich, navy blue gown instead. It's subtle yet sophisticated. Made out of the finest silk, its silhouette is sleek and falls straight down to the floor without any extravagant frills. The neckline is simple too, paired with a tasteful open back. There are no flashy accessories or embellishments, just a straightforward, classic design. You find the gown beautifully elegant, and nowhere near as bold as your previous one.

"Here it is Ms. __," Hana chips from afar, her heels clacking against the polished floor tiles. In her hand is a generously sized garment bag, your dress flowing underneath.

"Thank you so much, Hana," you say, taking the gown from her hand. "Again, I'm sorry for my tardiness picking this up. I hope you have a wonderful night."

You leave the boutique, the sun having already set.

The Winter Gala takes place on the top floor of Seoul's most luxurious hotel, specifically in its grand ballroom. The walls are adorned with gold trim, and its floors are elegantly lined with polished black marble. Above, a magnificent glass chandelier glimmers, catching the moonlight filtering through the surrounding glass windows.

Despite being a private event, the gala attracts a whole slew of press and locals who eagerly gather on either side of the hotel's front doors, treating it as a prime spot for viewing the red carpet.

Physically, you're ready; dressed to the nines, and makeup done just right. Mentally, you're absent; secretly sipping a margarita at the end of the earth, wherever that is. The day finally comes for you to make an appearance at the Annual Winter Gala and it's clear, you're not prepared in the slightest.

Your nerves consume you as you sit in the backseat of your limousine. You protested against being dropped off at the front entrance. Hell, you hadn't even wanted to arrive in a limo. However, your PR team insisted you be seen arriving, happy to be supporting a charitable event for the eighth year in a row.

Reluctantly, you complied.

Chim 🐥: I wish I could be there with you tonight 😞 No matter what, don't let those snobs get into your head. You look stunning and you have nothing to be ashamed of! [sent at 6:23 pm]

"Thank you, love," you whisper to aloud upon reading your best friend's endearing message. Before you can craft a reply, your door is flung open, with harsh flashes of cameras blinding you. When you step out of the limo, you hear a mix of passionate cheering and interrogative remarks.

"Ms. __, could you share with us your experience of attending the gala without Jeon Jungkook by your side for the first time?"

"Ms. __, it's unexpected to see you here this year, especially considering your recent separation from your ex-husband, who is also on the guest list!"

"Ms. __, how do you plan to navigate the evening's festivities without the familiar presence of your former partner?"

Just keep walking __. If you can just get inside the building and tune out the noise, you'll be fine. You coach yourself with every step, but make little progress with the amount of discomfort only skyrocketing. Your photos are being taken, and questions barrage you from all angles. To top it off, you feel a strong migraine coming on and oh fuck— is that the devil now?

You don't have to glance back to guess the sudden increase in cheering is due to the arrival of another hot A-lister. It has to be Jungkook with a new woman by his side. You think he wouldn't bring a date to an event like this, even if she were a hire? You'd be horribly mistaken.

You fight against the urge to turn around and confirm if your suspicions are true.

"__!" a voice calls out, which you ignore.

But wait a minute.

You stop in your tracks—that's not Jungkook's voice at all; it’s far too raspy.

Peeking over your shoulder, your jaw falls open as you see Kim Taehyung steps behind you wearing a boxy grin on his face. He's dressed to the hills with a shiny maroon, Louis Vuitton suit hugging his slim waist. Quite handsome, per usual, but what is he doing here?

Taking the initiative, Taehyung strides next to you and waves to the crowd charismatically. “My movie shoot wrapped up early so I thought I’d swing by and see what all the excitement’s about,” he says.

You observe how easy it is for him to appease the crowd, a skill you’re still working to sharpen.

“Tae-” you begin.

He then turns to you and looks straight into your eyes. You shiver at from the sudden intensity.

“I got an invitation too, and the gala happens to support a cause that I find close to my heart.” His voice lowers for the next part, allowing only your ears to hear. “I also didn’t want you having to be alone this evening, __. I hope I didn’t overstep my boundaries.”

Taehyung’s words manage to coax you away from your previously frazzled state, comforting you as the chaos quiets around you.

“Thank you, Taehyung. You didn’t, don’t worry,” you reply, giving a tight-lipped smile. “It’s actually a good thing you came since you’re basically the second face of my company after all.”

“I’m happy to hear that. We’ve been working so well together recently, and I don’t want to ruin it. May I?” He offers you an arm.

“You may.” You slip your arm into his and continue towards the hotel entrance. You admit you’re glad to see him.

With Taehyung nearby, your apprehensions of the night start to subside. He’s not always beside you, slipping away to mingle often, yet his mere presence relaxes you. You haven’t even thought about Jungkook to be honest. Well, maybe a little bit.

You take a sip of the drink in your hand and casually scan the ballroom until bingo, you spot your ex-husband by the bar in the middle of half a dozen people. Figures he’s the center of attention, effortlessly tethering people to himself. Jungkook loves the spotlight, and the spotlight loves him. As you continue watching him from across the room, a whirlwind of conflicting emotions swirls within you; longing, sorrow, anger. You haven't seen him in over two months, it feels surreal.

Memories of your time together come flooding back all at once—both the good and the bad, yet mostly bad. It's strange how someone you were once so close to can suddenly feel like a stranger. You allow your gaze to linger a moment longer, curious to conclude a date is nowhere in sight. Perhaps you’re mistaken and they’ve merely slipped away for a second. You’re positive he would’ve brought someone.

Bitterly, you gulp down another sip of your drink. When you place your glass down, you nearly choke at the sight of Jungkook's dark eyes burning holes at you. You avert your gaze immediately, silently begging that he didn’t just witness you staring at him and take it as an unsolicited invitation to come over.

“So,” a provocative voice unexpectedly slides next to you. “Looks like you just traded one bachelor for the next __. I’m shocked to see you’ve shown up to our little soirée.”

Oh god, you roll your eyes, recognizing the owner of the slithery voice like the back of your hand. You do not have the stamina for this tonight.

“Kathy," you greet with the fakest, yet sweetest smile possible. "Nice seeing you again. I haven't seen you since last year. How's the baby?"

"Oh please," she scoffs. "Don't try to deflect, sweetie. We both know it's you who is of far more... intrigue. If you understand my gist."

You want to hurl at this woman's condescending tone. Nothing gets under your skin more than someone your age calling you sweetie. It's not endearing in the slightest, especially when it's Kathy Lee, Director of CommaTen. You despise each other, likely because you both hit it big in the industry at a young age. Meeting someone who reminds you so closely of yourself isn't always a blessing.

“Anyway, as I was saying," she continues, brushing her hair behind an ear. "I have quite the bone to pick with you about stealing that actor from me. Kim Taehyung was mine first, you know."

Hers? She speaks as if a person can be owned. You won't lie, you're surprised Taehyung agreed to partner with you at a time when most of Seoul's elites have turned against you. You're naive to assume that his support wouldn't backfire on his reputation. On the other hand, he's been your endorser for two months now and his following remains fully intact.

“To be frank, I didn't know the two of you were talking business at all," you respond to the accusations with composure, though burning up inside. "But of course, he's free to make his own decisions, can't he? Whatever the reason, something must have enticed him."

“You—" Offended by your insinuation that your offer was better than hers, Kathy doesn't stop what comes next. "We both know the only reason why Kim Taehyung's with you is because Jungkook left you! And you need the extra publicity, isn't that right?"

Fuck. Well, now you're really fucking embarrassed because, at that moment, everyone in the room shifts their attention your way. A pin drop could be heard in the entire ballroom since even the live band ceased their playing.

This is why you didn't want to come. Your fingers fumble with the fabric of your gown.

“Don't act like you're above me just because your company might be worth more than mine, __. We'll catch up with you soon," Kathy spits her final words before spinning around and triumphantly walking away.

Don't cry, you tell yourself. Everyone's staring at you; the press, your peers, Jungkook, and Taehyung. Don't you dare cry.

As the murmurs of conversation gradually resume around you, you force yourself to take a deep, steadying breath. Kathy's words were nothing but a feeble attempt to save her own face. Besides, what company doesn't have at least one endorser?

"Are you alright?" Taehyung's low, gentle voice catches your attention as he swiftly returns to your side, no doubt influenced after witnessing Kathy's verbal jab.

You manage a tight-lipped smile, nodding faintly as you attempt to push back the overwhelming wave of humiliation. "I will be," you reply, though the words feel hollow even to your own ears.

His gaze lingers on you for a moment longer, a silent understanding passing between you.

"I hope you don't take her words to heart, __," he mutters. "I chose to become your partner because I genuinely believe in your product. I'm selective about who I support, so please trust me when I say it wasn't because of material gain or pity."

You're on the verge of responding to his reassurance when you catch sight of your ex-husband from the corner of your eye, striding his way over to you for the first time tonight. His expression is unreadable, so you brace yourself, unsure of what to expect.

"__," he starts, his voice low but carrying an unmistakable urgency. "Can we talk?"

You and Taehyung share a quick glance before you follow Jungkook out of the ballroom, seeking privacy.

As soon as you're out of earshot, Jungkook turns to you, his features softened by a hint of concern. "Hey," he starts. "I meant to get over to you sooner but got tied up. You know how it is."

"Yeah, I know," you respond, though you'd rather he didn't come over at all, especially after being dragged into the spotlight in front of all your peers and colleagues.

The two of you share an unsettling silence before he speaks again.

"You-You look good." He allows his eyes to rake up and down your body, causing you to cross your arms in discomfort. There was a time when his gaze brought a flutter of excitement, but now, you're not so sure it brings you the same pleasure.

"I'm sorry for what happened in there," he says. "You okay?"

"What?" you repeat, your eyes wide with surprise, stunned by his unexpected apology. "Am I okay?"

Where was this concern when he handed you the divorce papers nine months ago? Or when he willingly took advantage of your vulnerability that time in your office, only to disappear afterward, as if he hadn't just torn your heart out of your chest? You clench your fists, trying to contain the rising temperature of your anger.

"Yeah, about what she said about you," he clarifies. "It was uncalled for, and I feel horrible about it." He reaches out to touch you, but you instinctively step back, as if his touch would scorch you.

"Please, don't," you sigh, a trace of weariness in your voice. "It's fine."

"I'm serious __, I can have her charged with defamation for that. It wouldn't take much!" His insistence is unwavering, and it strikes your last nerve.

"You don't need to fight my battles for me, Jungkook," you suddenly snap, voice stern. "I'm not completely helpless now that you've divorced me!"

Jungkook's expression darkens, regret flickering in his eyes. "I'm not saying you are. I'm just trying to help."

"Help?" you repeat, doubtful. "How do you think that's going to look for me in the media? Jeon Jungkook slaps another high society member with a defamation charge for ex-wife. Thanks, but no thanks. I get enough of that as is."

He sighs, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I know they've been difficult on you recentl—"

"Difficult?" you interject, your anger bubbling to the surface. "In case you haven't noticed my face is on every gossip magazine, billboard, press release, and anything else they can use to scorn me with. It's unbearable, especially since I still have a business to run."

Jungkook winces, clearly stung by your words. "Then let me help. I'll get them removed for you. I still care about you, __."

You scoff. "You care about me? Is that why you made me sign our divorce papers three months after you found out I wanted more than a fake marriage?"

His jaw clenches, gaze dropping to the floor guiltily. "It's not like that, __. I'm not trying to be an avoidant asshole. I want you to-"

"Find someone else. Yeah, I got it," you mutter bitterly, feeling a fresh wave of hurt wash over you.

"I'm sorry, __. I am."

You stare at him, torn between resentment and a lingering ache for the connection you once shared. Now, he's apologizing?

"So am I," you say, slowly backing away from him. "You don't have to do anything, Jungkook. I'm fine."

You then turn on your heels to return to the ballroom where Taehyung still waits for you, leaving your ex-husband standing in the hallway, alone.

a/n: A much-needed confrontation between oc and jk eh? But... *laughs evilly*..this is not the end...LMK what you think! 🤔🤍

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spideyjimin · 9 months ago

Text

Perfect time | jjk

⤷ part of the timing series

⏤ pairing: jungkook x female reader

⏤ genre: parent au, exes to lovers, ceo au, angst, fluff, and smut

⏤ rating: 18+

⏤ warnings: dilf!jungkook, tattooed!jungkook, swearing, mention of heartbreak, childbirth, mention of complications during childbirth, mention of abortion, mention of death, mention of toxic relationship, low self esteem, mention of the motherhood’s hardships, mention of sex, teasing, flirting, sexual tension, nipple play, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, jealousy, mention of breakups, dispute, making out, fingering, and creampie

⏤ words: 18,086

⏤ summary: right or wrong time? actually, was there a time at all for you and jungkook? following your heartbreaking conversation with him, you feel that you were loved but not wanted. however, would it be worse than feeling wanted but not loved? nevertheless, there’s a deep feeling inside you telling you that it’s far from being over with jungkook. will this mean that one day it will be the perfect time?

�� author’s note: the final part is finally here! it's less than 20k as I thought it would be but it's still quite long for me 🥴 I truly hope you enjoy this last part of the timing series, it was honestly super fun to write it & it also helped me a lot! i hope you like this part, let me know what you think! thanks a lot for all the amazing support , it made this wild experience very funny! 💛

As you’re looking at the screen with total disbelief, it makes you feel that the universe is throwing an unpleasant joke at your face. Your heart suddenly starts beating extremely fast in your chest. There’s absolutely no possible way that this moment is really happening. That this is real.

Your world is totally collapsing under your feet.

The past nine months have been quite hard, especially after the heartbreak Jungkook caused. Remembering the day he abandoned you sends shivers down your spine. You don’t like thinking about that moment because you felt completely alone with your bleeding heart in your hands. Currently, you don’t really know if you moved on from him but you’ve been seeing a guy, Yeonjun for the past two months. You’re not dating but you’re simply enjoying each other's company. Being around him makes you happy and that’s all that matters.

Right now, you’re lying on a medical examination table in the emergency room. This morning you woke up with terrible back pain. A pain that had only been growing even though you took some painkillers. Throughout your life, you experienced quite a lot of back pain so at first, this didn’t really surprise you, especially since yesterday was a crazy day.

Then, a stomach ache was added on top of the back pain which made everything very much unbearable. Yeonjun told you from the beginning to go to the doctor to check that out but you refused. When the stomach ache appeared, he took you to the hospital. There was no way he was going to let you suffer even though you were being very stubborn and you didn’t want to go.

Well, now that you’re looking at that screen, you believe he did right. He’s staying in the waiting room while you’re being examined. But thinking of him currently breaks your heart because what you’re seeing on the screen will probably put an end to the blooming relationship between you. You don’t want to lose him, he’s been such a ray of sunshine in your life. Even Lux told you that you look happier than ever since he’s been part of your life.

“I believe there is no need to tell you that we’re looking at a fully developed baby,” the obstetrician tells you. “Considering the size and the position of the baby, I would say that you’re in labor.”

A tear runs down your face. Since the baby is fully developed, it means that they were conceived nine months ago. Jungkook is the father of this baby of yours. He’s the only man you slept with nine months ago.

“Based on what I see right now, there are no concerning health problems but we would need to take several exams once they are born,” she adds.

You’re in complete shock. How on earth is this even possible? How could you have not noticed this? Were there even signs that you ignored? How could this baby have grown hidden inside your body? And why has this happened?

“I know this is a big shock,” the obstetrician says with a lot of sympathy. “But the only thing we can do right now is deliver this baby, check that everything is okay with them, and then you will think about what you’ll do.”

She isn’t wrong but your brain has totally stopped working. You’re not able to think or say anything because this is just too much to process.

“Would you let me check how many centimeters you are dilated?”

You simply nod because like she said, the focus right now is to deliver this little human safely. She informs you to remove your pants and underwear, to place your foot in the foot supports, and to place your butt as close as possible at the end of the table. She places herself in between your legs to examine you properly. She definitely isn’t the person you were expecting to have between your legs…

As this moment completely overwhelms you, all that you want is to have your mama with you. You just wish to be in the comfort of your mama’s arms because no other arms will ever be able to comfort you, well except your father’s. And right now, you feel like a little baby that needs to be reassured by her parents.

“You’re 7 centimeters dilated,” she informs you. “The baby is almost here. We would need to move you to a delivery room.”

She keeps talking about all the information you need to know before the delivery. But your mind stopped listening after ‘the baby is almost here’. You’re simply disconnected from reality since this is too much to handle. All you think about is to have your mama. Nothing else.

“Would you need someone to come?” she asks you.

“I need to call my mama,” you reply.

The obstetrician helps you to come down from the examination table. Quickly, you put back your underwear and trousers. As you do so, you notice that your belly has grown a tiny bit. In the midst of what she said while you were disconnected, you heard her saying that your belly will suddenly grow a lot until childbirth. This is scary. Extremely scary.

Once dressed, you grab your phone to call your mom. The obstetrician indicates to you to follow her to move to the delivery room.

“Mama,” you say when your mom picks up.

“Hello, sweetie,” she answers.

“Mama,” you repeat, “I’m going to have a baby very soon,” you immediately burst into tears.

Now that you’ve said it out loud, it seems real. You’re really going to have a baby today, you’re about to become a mother. The mother of yours and Jungkook’s baby. But you’re absolutely not ready to endorse that role. However, beyond not being ready to take on that role, you also have nothing prepared in your apartment to welcome a baby. No bed, no clothes, no diapers, and all the other things a mother is supposed to have when having a child.

But the true question right now is: do you want to keep the baby? or would you give them up for adoption?

“Yn,” she starts saying, “where are you?”

You tell her which hospital you are in and she immediately declares that she’ll be there in a couple of minutes. With surprise, the obstetrician hugs you to try to soothe you. Honestly, it’s also hard for her to see you in this ravaged state.

“I’m so sorry to be the one announcing this devastating news, miss y/l/n,” she whispers while caressing your back. “I really want to say that everything will be alright but it’s a promise I can’t make. Childbirth is hard, there might be complications, the baby could have issues that I couldn’t see in the ultrasound, and after all that, you will need to decide if you want to keep the baby.”

You hug her even more because it’s hard to hear all those things. This day is only getting worse and worse. Not only have you found out that you’re carrying a baby that you’ll have to deliver, but you’ll have to decide what to do if they live and have no health issues at birth. Give them up for adoption or keep them.

“Your mother is coming, right?” she asks and you nod. “Then, you’ll have the biggest support,” she adds. “Have you also informed the father of the baby?”

Right there, your body freezes even more. In the middle of all this chaos, you haven’t thought of informing Jungkook. Actually, you haven't even considered having Yeonjun informed since he’s waiting for you to come back. But you have to inform both of them, they can’t stay in the dark and even if you’re angry at Jungkook, you have to tell him. He deserves to have the choice to be present at your baby’s birth.

So you pull away from the obstetrician to call your ex. She instantly understands that you’re about to call your baby’s father. She takes a step back to give you the space you need. As you’re waiting for Jungkook to pick up, you nervously bite your lower lip. You haven’t spoken in nine months, and now you’re about to tell him that you’re carrying his child who will be born still today.

“Yn,” Jungkook says with surprise when he picks up.

Jungkook wasn’t expecting at all to receive a call from you, especially after what he did. He hears you sniffle and honestly, it breaks his heart. He wonders if it has anything to do with the space he asked for or if it has anything to do with him at all.

“Are you okay?” he asks with evident concern.

“I’m calling you because I’m about to give birth to our child. If you wish to be present, you can come,” you simply inform him.

At your words, his body completely freezes. He can’t believe what he’s hearing and many questions cross his mind. But honestly, he doesn’t want to waste a second questioning you, it’s better to join you at the hospital and raise any questions there. It would be better. After that, he asks which hospital you are in and he leaves his company to get to you as soon as possible.

Nurses appear in the room, asking you to wear a hospital blouse while the obstetrician calls for Yeonjun. Slowly but surely, your belly grows bigger. It’s still small but currently, you probably look like you’re 4-5 months pregnant. The blouse kind of hides it but it’s there, your pregnant belly is there. This is becoming very real. You’re about to give birth to a baby that you created with Jungkook. A little human will come to the surface of the earth because of you.

However, the only reasonable thing to do is to give this baby up for adoption. Jungkook broke your heart, you haven’t spoken since then and you’re absolutely not ready for this. A baby isn’t a little thing. A baby is a human you’ll have to forever take care of. A baby you’ll be responsible for at least 18 years. This baby will forever link you with Jungkook and because of all those reasons, this baby will be happier with another family. If you had found out about this pregnancy at its premises, you would have aborted. There’s no doubt about it. Now, you can’t abort but you can offer them a much better life.

As you’re walking in circles in the room to distract from the excruciating pain, Yeonjun enters the room with worry written all over his face.

“Yn,” he says while coming in your direction, “what’s going on?”

You take a very deep breath as you feel a contraction. “I’m about to give birth,” you tell him, “to Jungkook’s child.”

With Yeonjun, you have spoken quite early on about your ex but you haven’t spoken about everything. He knows the most important things, just as you know the overall story of his relationship with his ex. His eyes wide open, absolutely surprised by your words. All this time that he has known you, there was literally a human growing inside you. That’s wild.

“It’s a cryptic pregnancy,” you add. “The pain I’ve been feeling was due to the fact that I was in labor.”

Yeonjun nods, understanding the situation. It all makes sense now. But he’s worried about you, about what you’re feeling right now.

“How are you?” he asks with concern.

“Not good,” you reply. “Physically this is horrible and emotionally, it’s devastating. My mind is all over the place but I don’t want this baby,” you tell him crying.

Yeonjun holds you close and dearly in his arms. He can only imagine how you are feeling right now. This is a life-changing thing. After this, you’ll never be the same no matter what decision you take.

“I don’t want this baby,” you keep repeating while sobbing in his arms.

He doesn’t know what to say nor what to do. You’re in pain physically and emotionally and all he can do is support you through this. It’s not going to be easy from now on but he’ll hold your hand, he’ll be there for you because it is what you need. His heart is very much broken when he hears you crying and repeating that you don’t want this baby. It’s hard for him but he pushes away what he’s feeling to be there for you, to focus solely on you.

His eyes scan the room to find a nurse. He needs guidance to help you in the best way possible. Plus, he knows that you deeply need it as well. The medical team needs to guide you through everything until the birth. A nurse enters the room at that precise moment.

“Have you changed your clothes, miss y/l/n?” she asks while getting closer to you two.

“Yes,” you answer, looking up at her, “but please call me yn.”

She nods with a little smile.

“The obstetrician informed me about the full situation. The good news is that the baby is very well-positioned and they are slowly descending. I will need to examine you so we can check if we see their head.”

This time, you’re the one nodding. Yeonjun helps you to reach the hospital bed and to lay down. It’s quite difficult to move with this terrible pain caused by the contractions. The nurse checks everything and a smile appears on her face.

“So we see the baby’s head, this is good. Now, it’s a matter of hours before the baby is here.”

Tears roll even more down your face. In a matter of hours, your world would change forever because of this exact baby that you don’t want.

“Yn, I know it’s very hard for you right now but I need you to only focus on giving birth,” she says. “I will guide you through every step and I won’t be leaving you alone. In no time, this pain will be gone.”

Her words are adorable and it touches you deeply but it doesn’t change anything.

“Now, I will need to monitor your contraction and baby’s heartbeat. It won’t hurt, I’ll only place a monitor on your belly. Is it okay?”

Again you nod. While the monitor is placed on your belly, the door opens, revealing another nurse with your mom. She runs to you. The first thing she does is place a kiss on your forehead.

“Oh my god,” she whispers. “It’s really happening.”

For everyone in this room, it feels unreal. This pregnancy has had the effect of a bomb because it is beyond unexpected. Nobody saw anything and your mother feels some guilt as she sees you with tears in your eyes and so much pain painted all over your face. She should have noticed it.

But it’s nobody’s fault. Nobody could have seen it.

“I don’t want this baby, mama,” you say with tears running down your face.

“I know, sweetheart,” she caresses your face. “But don’t think about it now, focus on giving birth, and then, you’ll decide what to do with the baby,” she says before pressing another kiss on your forehead.

“But I don’t want…”

Before you can finish your sentence, the door opens to reveal Jungkook. His eyes land on the only person he has ever deeply loved. You. He instantly notices that you’re suffering ⏤ and not just a bit ⏤ but his heart breaks when he sees you crying. This only sight is too much for him but he’s here. Never would he have missed the birth of his child. Your child. This is something he never thought possible. Neither did you.

The atmosphere is quite heavy in the room, all of you feel it. All eyes are on Jungkook, he offers a little smile before walking in your direction. Yeonjun moves to give him the space to be near you, and it’s just at that moment that Jungkook notices him. However, he doesn’t really start questioning who this man is and what he is doing here. All he cares about right now is to understand this situation.

As you see Jungkook standing next to you, it makes this chaotic situation even more real, which makes it even more overwhelming. You can’t have a baby with him, it’s not possible. Things between you have never worked out and they are actually complicated.

“Hey, yn,” he finally says. “What is going on?”

“I didn’t know,” you tell him, still crying. “I promise you that I didn’t.”

The second he entered the room, Jungkook instantly understood that you weren’t aware of this pregnancy. The suffering was beyond the one of childbirth, there was an evident emotional distress written all over your face and it was combined with the pain of childbirth. He assisted at Arya’s birth so he saw how painful it is to give birth to a little human. So, naturally, he didn’t need you to say anything to understand the full picture.

“It’s okay, yn,” he gently says, “I knew it.”

You nod. Every person in this room is shattered to see you like this. Your mother and Jungkook would even say that this comes close to how you were when your sister passed away. You look completely overwhelmed by the situation, and the only other time it happened was with your sister’s death.

“How are you feeling?”

Even though this is causing a lot of pain, you can see that Jungkook is genuinely and deeply concerned about you.

“Not good,” you admit honestly, “and I don’t want this baby.”

“It’s understandable, yn,” he replies. “This is a massive surprise, and giving birth is hard too but you have the support of every person here, we won’t let you down in this particularly difficult moment.”

To be honest, you weren’t expecting those words to come from Jungkook’s mouth. From your mother or from Yeonjun, yes but never from Jungkook. However, it warms your heart. Having them three supporting you through this difficult moment helps tremendously. It doesn’t erase the physical and emotional pain but it eases it.

The following hours have been the most painful ones that you ever experienced. Time seemed to have completely stopped while the intensity of the contractions smashed you completely. But slowly, you could sense the baby descending. It was extremely weird but it was also a very unique experience. Even if you were in pain, you were also in awe of everything that your body was doing to give birth to your child.

You walked a lot in the hospital with Jungkook and your mother to help out with the pain but you were stopping every time you were having a contraction. Yeonjun was present but in the background because this moment was yours and Jungkook’s. It wasn’t his even though he really wished to be part of it. This wasn’t his child that you were delivering. It was Jungkook’s.

Once you reached the 10 centimeters of dilation, you laid down on the hospital bed to give birth to your baby. It was horrible to push, you were feeling like everything inside you was getting ripped. Feeling the baby being pushed down was awful. Jungkook was holding your left hand, encouraging you the way he could. On your right side, it was your mother that was holding your hand. Yeonjun wasn’t in the room, you were simply allowed to have 2 people with you. It broke your heart that he had to leave but honestly, he preferred that way. What truly mattered to him was to be present for all the other moments. Plus, he’ll be present for you once the baby is born. He’ll support you when you have to make a decision concerning your baby.

After what felt like an eternity, the room was filled with the loud cries of your baby. The baby was instantly put against your chest, your hands automatically wrapped him to make sure that they were really here. The feeling of your child’s skin against yours eased your mind in a way that you can’t express. However, what hit you the most was the love you felt for that tiny human. How could that even be possible? Hours ago you didn’t even want this child to even exist but right after being born, you felt love for them.

This love you felt isn’t that love described by every mother. It wasn’t like loving your mom for example but there was a certain love, one that you weren’t expecting to feel since you didn’t want this baby in the first place.

The baby’s cries calmed down when they were placed against you. Your hands naturally caressed them in an attempt to calm them down. The moment was reassuring for you both and definitely very much needed. It was your first interaction together. The first moment you shared with the little human you created.

“This is a very loud little boy,” the obstetrician said while revealing the gender of your baby. Her eyes looked up at Jungkook. “Would you like to cut the umbilical cord?”

Your ex nodded before moving closer to her. She showed him where to cut and he did it with immense pride. It was the second umbilical cord that he cut but each time, he felt nothing more than pride. The pride of becoming a father.

“This strong boy was born on December 15th at 22:01,” the obstetrician said while looking at the clock in the room.

The second the time of birth was announced you handed the baby to Jungkook. Despite everything, he was the father after all and he deserved a first moment with his son. A big smile appeared on his face when he saw his son for the first time. Just like you, he felt an unexplainable love for this tiny baby. Honestly, while you were in labor, he didn’t stop to think if he wanted to keep this child or give them up for adoption. He was only focused on helping you out.

Inexplicably, as you were watching them, you felt something inside your heart. Again, it was something you can’t quite describe but it was definitely some sort of love. If you were honest with yourself, you’d know that you were still in love with Jungkook, and seeing him with your child made your heart burst even more with love.

Your eyes were glued to that little tiny human that you literally pushed out from your body. This morning, you were still simply you. And just like that, at night, you became a mother.

Jungkook spent the night with you at the hospital. He informed Eunjin that he would need her to take care of Arya for at least a week. He didn’t explain the reason behind his request but he told her that he would explain later. Right now, what matters the most is being next to you and figuring this all out. Because now, you’ll have to decide the future of the boy you conceived.

Your son underwent multiple tests in the first hours of his tiny existence to confirm that he didn’t have any serious medical condition, which was the case. The little baby is in solid health and he amazes you even more, he dearly held on to life. No matter what decision you make, you will forever admire this strong little boy.

For the past hour, you’ve been looking at him sleeping in his little crib. The nurses swaddled him in a blanket and put a little cap on him. You can’t help but find him extremely adorable but as you stare at him you wonder if keeping him is the best thing to do. Merely hours before he was born, you didn’t want him but the love you felt for him the minute he was born has changed everything. You’re not sure anymore about what has to be done.

“He’s so calm,” Jungkook’s voice echoes in the room.

Your eyes look up at him. He’s sitting on a chair, on the other side of the crib and he’s also been staring at your son for the past hour. Both of you are completely lost, none of you knows what to do. For sure, you both have always wanted to have children but never under those circumstances. Well, Jungkook feels extremely guilty to have another child with someone he’s not in a relationship with and he can only blame himself for it. But this time, it’s completely different. This was a surprising birth.

“He is,” you reply. “It seems like he doesn’t want to bother anyone,” you add.

Seeing this little baby brings Jungkook back to the day Arya was born. She was even tinier than him, they were also very different but the love he felt for them the second he saw them for the first time is exactly the same. They are both his children, the flesh of his flesh. Looking at his tiny son makes him want to keep him. He wants to protect this little human. He wants to raise him. He wants to see him grow. He wants to see what kind of person he will become. He simply wants to give him love.

But the truth is that it ain’t that simple. Neither of you expected this baby to arrive and he knows very well that he broke your heart. Things are definitely not easy between you. Adding a child in the mix won’t make this any easier so realistically speaking giving him up for adoption is the best thing you could do for this child. He’ll be with parents who will deeply love him, with parents who will be happily together. He’ll grow up in a much better environment. This child deserves the best.

“This whole situation breaks my heart for him,” you say while your gaze moves between your son and your ex. “He’s been hiding for 9 months, surviving while I wasn’t taking any precaution. I have so much admiration for him but he deserves better,” your eyes now stop on Jungkook. “I didn’t even want him before he was born, I didn’t even notice him. He was literally growing inside me and I didn’t see him. What kind of human am I?”

You start crying intensely. Jungkook stands up, running in your direction before holding you tightly in his arms. You blame yourself a lot for this whole situation. If you had noticed your pregnancy earlier, you wouldn’t be in this position right now. Feeling his strong arms around you brings you some kind of comfort. It also makes you feel like you’re not alone.

“Hey,” Jungkook says while rubbing your back, “don’t be hard on yourself like that. It is definitely not your fault, this is something you couldn’t have noticed. And look at him, he’s very healthy, he’s perfectly fine so even if you didn’t feel him, you did everything great otherwise he wouldn’t be here and healthy.”

Your eyes are completely shut while you sob in Jungkook’s arms. Honestly, having him by your side in this crazy situation is very helpful and very much needed. You desire nothing more than to be angry at him for absolutely everything but this is a position you both put yourself in. You need him to navigate this together and in the best way possible. This is a human’s life we’re talking about. It’s not a little thing you can get over.

“This is definitely a tricky position we’re both in because we have to decide what’s best for him in such a short amount of time but I truly believe that he’s here for a reason. No matter what decision we take, I’m sure he’s going to do just fine because he’s your son. You’re a very strong person and look how strong he already is. I’m absolutely proud of the little man he already is,” Jungkook confesses. “Being able to call him my son swells my heart with pride.”

Fatherhood is something Jungkook knows very well. Being proud of your child is something you feel the second they’re born. But in this case, he feels even more pride for him because he survived 9 months while hiding inside you. He’s very much aware that the decision you’ll take will be the best for him but he’ll forever feel tremendous pride for this little man.

“You’re not at fault nor should you feel guilty for all of this. It’s nobody’s fault here. Things are pretty rocky right now but we will go through everything together. I won’t ever leave you alone.”

Jungkook means every word that leaves his mouth. He’s not proud of the way he handled things when you came back to his life but this is a situation that he doesn’t want to run away from. For sure, he can’t leave you alone, especially right now. He’s aware that you need him more than ever, and he also needs you. And from now on and whatever happens, he’ll forever be by your side. There’s no way he can abandon you after this.

“However, now, we should focus on what future we want to offer him,” he whispers.

The way you’re holding on to his arms reminds him of the time your sister passed away. That’s the only other time that you held him like this. It feels like your life really depends on it and that if you let go, you’ll die. And it devastates him. Because those two events are completely opposites. The last time was because of the ending of a life, death and this time is because of the beginning of a life, birth.

“I don’t know, Kook,” you manage to say in between sobs.

“Then, let’s think together,” he says while gently pushing you.

As much as he wants to be the strong one, he can’t when he sees your ravaged face. This is beyond heartbreaking. His hands place your hair behind your ears while you clean your face. You thank him for helping you out, and he offers you a little smile. Both of you quickly glance at the little boy peacefully sleeping in the crib.

“We need to think beyond what we are feeling right now, okay?” he asks and you nod. “So, first off, what would happen to him if we gave him up for adoption?”

You take a moment to think. It’s a bit complicated to really think with all the overwhelming negative emotions you’re feeling right now but you try as hard as possible to push them aside. You really want to focus on your son’s future, he truly deserves it.

“Well, a social worker would come to take him and probably ask us if we are 100% sure we want to put him up for adoption. Afterwards, I’d be discharged and we would both go back home. We would resume back to our lives pretending that nothing ever happened,” you say, Jungkook nods agreeing with your reasoning. “However, we would realize that it’s impossible to pretend that nothing ever happened. Right there, we would most probably regret our decision and imagine how things could have turned out if we kept him. Maybe, we would reach out to each other to discuss it. We would cry and we would probably try to find him to see what he has become.”

Just the thought of having regrets hurts a lot for the two of you. At that exact moment, the right decision becomes quite clear but it is still best to go through both scenarios.

“Now, from his point of view,” you say. “Most probably he’d have a rather good life unless he remains forever in a foster home. There are chances that he’d grow up feeling unloved, he’d wonder why we gave him up for adoption. If he ended up in a family that would deeply love him, he’d be loved but there would forever be this feeling of being not wanted. That feeling would also come from the fact that I had a cryptic pregnancy and that he was hiding all along,” you finalize.

This is a heartbreaking reality but you’ve heard in many documentaries that most adopted kids feel that way. It’s hard for them to feel wanted and loved. Your son doesn’t deserve to grow with that feeling simply because he wasn’t expected in your life. It’s a shock right now but it won’t be the case forever.

“I couldn’t agree more with you,” Jungkook replies. “And now for the other scenario?”

His big doe eyes stare at you deeply. You give yourself a couple of seconds before replying although you pretty much know the answer.

“First off, we would have to find a name because he couldn’t go by baby forever,” a little smile appears on your face as you look at your little baby. Jungkook notices the way you smile and it can’t help but warm his heart. “We would have to find an arrangement and figure out how we would want to raise him. It probably would never be easy but I guess we could find a common ground for him. There’s absolutely no doubt that we’d love him but we would need some time to overcome the shock we both feel right now. I’m very much uncertain about what the future holds if we keep him but I know that no matter what we’ll love him with all our hearts because we are his parents.”

Saying out loud that you are his parents is another reality check, and those are the final words to conclude your decision. It’s quite obvious what you’ll do. You’re keeping him.

“On my side, the decision is quite taken,” you say, looking up at Jungkook.

His deep stare sends shivers down your spine. Honestly, it would be a lie to say that you don’t feel anything anymore for this man but it’s best to brush it off.

“I’ll keep him because, in the long run, it is a decision that I would never regret,” you explain. “I’m very much aware that it’s not going to be easy for a lot of reasons but I already love him so much and I will forever love him. I can’t give him up for adoption because I will eventually regret it and I will break him by doing so. He deserves the best, I’m convinced I can give him that or at least I’ll try every day to do it,” you say. “Because I’m his mom.”

Jungkook smiles when you say that you’re the mother of his child. He doesn’t doubt at all that you’ll be a great mom, from his perspective, you already are.

“But the final decision will also depend on you,” you add.

“My decision was basically taken the second I laid my eyes on him,” he tells you. “But I had some doubts due to the shock. However, now that we’ve thought of both scenarios, all that I have to say is that I would never be able to live without him. He’s my son. I couldn’t live with myself if I gave him up for adoption.”

You’re thankful Jungkook was the reasonable one that made you really think about the future. A decision can’t be taken on a temporary feeling because it can cause a lot of damage. For sure, due to the surprise, giving him up for adoption seems like the right option but in the long run, it isn’t for any of you. Three lives would forever be broken.

“Thank you,” you say as you lay on your head on his shoulder.

Jungkook would be lying if he said that he didn’t love feeling your head on his shoulder. He would say right here that he regrets what he did to you nine months ago but he’s also very much aware that he doesn’t deserve you, especially not after what he did to you. It also won’t be correct of him to discuss that when you’re going through a tough time. Right now, all he can do is support you and be a good father to your child.

For the entire day, there’s been only you, Jungkook, and your little boy. You both agreed to be alone the entire day to focus on the right decision to take and to also find a name for your baby boy. But it has been a struggle. None of you seem to agree on a name.

“Did it take you and Eunji so long to find Arya’s name?” you ask.

Even though you know where the name comes from, Eunji also chose it. Your ex didn’t name his daughter all by himself, there’s a mother too. At the end of the day, she was the one who carried Arya for nine months.

“Well, it for sure took us more than 5 months,” he replies. “When we found out that it was a girl, we started a list with all the names we loved. However, we didn’t like the names the other liked. For 2 months, we kept adding names to the list to see if we could find one. Arya wasn’t on my list because it had a deep meaning for me, it was the name we agreed to give to our daughter,” his eyes stare deeply at you.

You still remember the day you were talking about all the cute names you’d give to your children. It’s a moment that always warms your heart because back then, everything seemed so easy. Your sister was still alive, you hadn’t kissed your ex-crush, everything was going well with Jungkook, and you were still head over heels in love with him. Well, honestly, it is still the case today even if he broke your heart.

The man standing in front of you has been your greatest love, the first man you really and deeply loved. A first real love always remains in your heart although they hurt you. They will forever stay in your heart. Hopefully, with time, the strong feelings you have for Jungkook will diminish, or at least, you hope that you will be able to keep moving with your life without those sentiments being an obstacle to your romantic life.

“Proposing that name would be like a betrayal towards you. I couldn’t do that,” he whispers. “Eunji was the one proposing it and at first, I pretended I didn’t like it. She really loved it but it was kind of removed from our list, which was still empty when she was 7 months pregnant,” a little smile appears on his face. “Then, at that point, you realize your daughter will be here very soon and you have to find a name. We needed to find compromises, we needed to find names that we at least liked a little bit. Again, Arya was not on our list,” his eyes never leave your face.

Honestly, as you glare at him, you can see in his eyes all the affection he has for you but you brush it off. However, it is actually the way he’s looking at you. Jungkook holds a lot of affection for you. He’ll always cherish you even though he behaved like a child. His heart still burns for you but he can’t come back in your life. Or at least not right now. For sure, if he does so, he’s very much aware that he’ll break your heart once more and you absolutely don’t deserve it. He’s even convinced that he doesn’t deserve you.

Those past nine months, he got the time to sit down and contemplate his actions. Unquestionably, he acted like a child. He was selfish, he only took from you what interested him, and then threw you away. But honestly, he never wondered what it would be like to have you back in his life. For the past ten years, he desperately wanted you back but he didn’t consider past that, probably because deep down, he was convinced that you would never come back. However, you came back and everything simply became overwhelming.

“Eunji kept bringing back Arya, and I don’t know, I simply gave up at some point because I always adored that name,” he explains. “I only explained after the birth of Arya why I didn’t want that name for our daughter, but honestly, for a long moment, I felt I betrayed you. I know it’s a deep emotion but back then, I hadn’t moved on.”

It is still the case today. The only difference now is that you’re actually around him and things are way more complicated than back then because he’s the one that messed everything up. Today, it’s his own fault if he can’t move on.

For a brief moment, you simply stare at each other like there’s nobody else but you in the room. It brings you both back to the time when you were lovers, when everything was absolutely easy. For a moment, you forget all the terrible things that have happened between you. You forget how toxic your relationship has been. It’s easy to forget when strong feelings are involved.

“It’s nice to finally know the background of Arya’s name,” you break this special moment, your eyes looking down at the little baby sleeping. “Now, we have to find one for our little mister.”

Well, this time around, you don’t have 5 months to find a name for your son. Today, he needs to have a name because he needs to be registered. The nurses have agreed to extend the deadline a bit but only because Jungkook is quite known and they were charmed by him.

“You know, I want his name to be related to my sister in some kind of way because I think she has sent him to us,” you say, convinced that your little man is a little gift from her. A gift she’s giving to you and Jungkook. She always adored him, you used to call yourself the ‘Fantastic Four’. You used to spend a lot of time with her and her boyfriend, it was always a good time.

“Yes, I’m also convinced she gave us this little man, and it would only make sense to name him in a way related to her,” he replies.

Jungkook was terribly affected by her death. He loved your sister, she was one of his closest friends, and losing her was devastating. Certainly not in the same way as you because she was your everything. As you lost her, you lost a big part of yourself.

“She’s my angel, the star that shines the brightest in the sky,” you add.

“Maybe we could try finding a name whose meaning is star?” Jungkook suggests.

You nod, totally agreeing with him. That’s definitely a fantastic idea. Jungkook googles ‘boy name meaning star’, and you both look at the suggestions. There’s nothing really interesting and matching your interests. The only thing you agreed on was to give him a short name like Arya.

The boy name you had chosen when you were younger was Axel but when you looked at your son, it didn’t feel like it was his name. He doesn’t have a face of being called Axel but in case you don’t manage to find a name for him, you’ll go with Axel. It would have made sense to name him like that because it was your decision but it doesn’t seem right.

However, the name Leo appears in Google's suggestions. The name catches your attention. Leo makes reference to a constellation in the sky and it also means lion. This is the perfect name for your child. A constellation is a group of stars so it definitely makes reference to your sister. Lion is a very strong animal, and your little baby is already very strong. This name is absolutely perfect for your son.

You and Jungkook look at each other with a bright smile on your faces. There’s no need to say anything, you both fell in love with this name. Then you look down at your calm little boy.

Jeon Leo, it’s perfect.

You bend down as much as you can, your body is completely sore from giving birth. It hurts everywhere. You caress the soft face of your son, he giggles a bit but not much. Now, this is your reality. You’re the mother of Leo, the son you share with Jungkook. Things are pretty rocky right now, and for sure, they are going to be for a little while. Your emotions are all over the place, and you’re convinced they will be for a time since now, you’re not going to sleep much.

But right now, all you want to focus on is your son.

The next day, both you and Jungkook agreed on only having your parents visit you. If each of you starts inviting people, at the end of the day, a lot of people will come, and it will be too much for you and Leo. It was absolutely adorable to see them interact with the baby. For your parents, it is their first grandchild but it isn’t the case for his parents. However, it doesn’t change the fact that they were mesmerized by him.

Your parents shed a little tear when you explained the meaning of his name. When your parents were in the room, it felt like your sister was also present. Honestly, it was a magical moment. A moment you’ll forever cherish in your heart, especially when they hold him in their arms. Your father even cried when he had Leo in his arms. At that precise moment, it didn’t matter that they never really liked Jungkook, it didn’t matter that he hurt you. Nothing really mattered, except sharing a family moment.

Having Jungkook’s parents was also very special. You hadn’t seen them in a while so it was good to see them. They were extremely happy to have another grandchild, they also liked the name. they said it was original just like Arya. Honestly, they were as surprised as your parents that you had a child together. None of them knew that you had seen each other but they didn’t raise out loud any question since this birth was unexpected.

When you’re alone at night in the room, you stare at Jungkook rocking Leo in his arms. Minutes ago you were breastfeeding him, it was a battle but slowly you were getting there, but it was a special and bonding moment between you. Now, Jungkook is trying to find a bonding moment with his son. Both of you are trying to create a connection with your son and learn how to love him.

Nevertheless, as you’re looking at them, it hits you in the face that Jungkook is now part of your family.

For the first time in four months, you’re out without Leo. Your mother and Lux took you out of the house so you could breathe a little bit. Everything has been a complete mess since Leo's birth, and honestly, you haven’t been feeling very great. From your perspective, you’re a terrible mother because it feels like you don’t love him at all. Yes, you felt some kind of love when he was born but since then, it feels like nothing has changed. For sure, the sleepless nights haven’t been helpful.

Most of the time, you feel completely lost. You don’t know exactly what you need to do, but the only thing that calms him down is when you hold him or when you’re breastfeeding him. But outside that, you don’t really know what to do. Everything is simply overwhelming. Being a mother is overwhelming.

“How are you feeling?” Lux rises after the waiter brings the coffees.

Your mother has come quite often to help you with Leo. She’s been your savior. Well, Jungkook has also been your savior. The fact that he already has a daughter is actually useful. He’s been by your side in every way. He’s very supportive and he always finds the words to reassure you when you’re crying in the middle of the night because you can’t put Leo to sleep. Frankly, without him, you don’t know how you could have survived those past four months.

“Extremely tired,” you answer. “Physically and mentally.”

They both know how hard it has been for you, and they can’t imagine how it must feel to become a mother overnight. On top of that, the father is your ex. It mustn’t be pleasant to constantly be around your ex, and let alone one that has broken your heart not long ago.

“But having Yeonjun helps me to kind of relax in the middle of this chaos,” you add with a little smile growing on your face.

Yeonjun has been your rock since the birth of Leo, he has helped you a lot. For sure, Jungkook has been your savior but Yeonjun is your rock. Without them and your mother, you would have completely fallen apart. He often comes to visit and he calls you everyday. He always makes sure that you eat every day and he’s also present to remind you when you need to take a shower.

However, what surprises you is how both he and Jungkook have managed to coexist together very peacefully. You’ve been living at Jungkook’s place since your son’s birth and the reason behind it is to make things easier. You are together through every step, you change diapers, you feed him, you reassure him when he cries, and you take turns when he wakes you up at night. You’ve been in this together and that’s your strength.

Yeonjun has been coming to your ex’s place. Jungkook has welcomed him with open arms and Yeonjun has felt comfortable being at his place. Your ex was the one encouraging you to give him a chance, to see where things could go but for now, it’s best to not start a relationship. Everything is pure chaos and you’re scared to hurt him unwillingly, simply because you’re going through a lot right now.

Jungkook has seen the way he helped you since the moment you were crying in the hospital bedroom and the way he has been there for you when he got all the reasons to leave you. He knows Yeonjun is the right one for you.

“That’s sweet that he’s been around,” your mother says. “I noticed how it has been helping you to stay sane.”

That is true. He’s been respecting your space which is more than appreciated while you try to figure out how to balance everything. As soon as things calm down a bit, you’ll go back to your apartment. You can’t stay forever at your ex’s place, especially since it’s hard to always be around him. The heartbreak is still very much here, and sometimes you feel like it’s amplified by the lack of sleep. But right now it seems like the easiest solution to navigate those first months.

“Yep,” you answer. “But it’s also not always easy to constantly be around Jungkook,” you add. “I know that we agreed that it was the best solution to live together for the first months of Leo’s life but it doesn’t change the fact that he hurt me.”

Maybe overtime, it won’t hurt anymore, at least that’s what you think. It’s already been more than a year and it hurts less than it did months ago. Certainly, having Yeonjun now helps a lot to ease the pain. He’s been treating you like a real princess and you feel extremely loved by him. You actually can’t wait to see how things will evolve with him, especially once you go back to your apartment.

“It doesn’t hurt as it did months ago but sometimes, all this chaos amplifies the pain. In those moments, I try to avoid him as much as I can,” you explain.

Well, sometimes, it’s complicated to avoid him, and most of the time, you completely explode. You throw all your anger at his face before totally bursting into tears, and since there’s nobody else in those moments, he’s the only one holding you in his arms to console you. Jungkook can imagine how it can be difficult for you but all he can do is be present for you when you need it.

“Honestly, I don’t know how you do,” Lux tells you. “If I were in your shoes, I would have already punched him in the face. I already wanted to do it with Henry when our son was born so I can’t imagine how it must be in your situation.”

Nobody around you can understand it. They can try but that’s it. Jungkook is the only one who can understand you. He also became a father overnight, he also had to figure out how to love his son, and he also had to figure out how to balance this new life. The only thing he can’t understand is how to live with an ex that broke your heart.

“It’s for Leo’s best interest,” you say. “And for mine as well,” you admit out loud. “It would be too hard if half of the time I was alone in my apartment.”

The two options you considered were living together for a couple of months or sharing custody right from the start. However, you knew that sharing custody would be way too difficult for you. You won’t regret the decision you made because even with Jungkook by your side, it’s still not easy. Your heart breaks whenever you hear Leo cry.

“But as soon as we find a balance, I’ll move back to my apartment. We agreed we’d stay at his place for at least the first 6 months of Leo’s life and that we’d assess the situation every month. But it’s quite obvious that it’s not the moment yet.”

They both nod. If right now this dynamic is what helps you, then you should keep doing it for as long as needed. Being with them out of the house feels good, it simply feels good to see other faces. You simply enjoy this moment with them. For the next 2 hours, you stay with them and talk about everything and anything.

Afterwards, you go back to Jungkook’s place. Since Arya is with her mother today, he was all alone with Leo. When you arrive, he’s half asleep with his son sleeping on his chest. There’s white noise playing in the background. It’s probably one of the YouTube videos he found to put Leo asleep. Your eyes quickly check out his torso which is on full display. He’s still extremely hot, and sometimes, you catch yourself wanting to have sex with him. You know it’s all due to your hormones being all over the place. But to be honest, being a father makes him look extra sexy.

“Hi, yn,” he whispers.

You get close to take a look at your son, he’s peacefully sleeping on his father’s chest which makes him look extremely adorable. Leo has been growing a lot for the past four months and getting chubbier day after day but it’s normal. The nurse told you that he has a normal weight and height for a four-month-old. Your son is absolutely so cute, he looks like a perfect mix between you and Jungkook.

“Hard to put him to sleep?” you ask with a little smile.

“Yep,” he replies. “Even doing the skin-to-skin thing wasn’t helping, but thankfully, white noises always work,” he says while trying not to speak too loudly.

“Maybe it’s best to try to put him in his crib?” you ask.

“Maybe not now,” he answers.

Jungkook feels a certain guilt by contradicting you, especially since he notices that you didn’t like his answer. But before he can even add something, you nod and leave the room to go to the bathroom to take a quick shower. However, before doing so, you sit down on the floor to pump your milk. Your breasts are heavy and full of milk. If you don’t empty them, even a tiny bit, they’ll explode. At least that’s what it feels like. You place the pumps on each of your breasts and close your eyes.

Seeing Jungkook’s body always wakes a fire inside you, and you need to calm it down. You always feel some culpability, especially since you’re falling in love with Yeonjun. There’s no doubt that you’re going to end up with him but Jungkook is always in a corner of your mind. He’s always there, and you’re afraid to hurt Yeonjun.

There’s a knock on the door, followed by Jungkook calling your name. You instantly open your eyes before readjusting yourself on the bathroom floor.

“Yes,” you answer.

“I’m sorry for contradicting you,” he mumbles.

“It’s okay Jungkook, you don’t have to be sorry every time we contradict each other,” you add.

Today, his disagreement had a bittersweet taste. You don’t exactly know why but it hurt you a bit when he didn’t agree with you. It’s silly but it doesn’t change the way you feel.

“I saw your face, yn,” he adds. “And I know that face very well, you didn’t like my answer.”

You close your eyes for a brief moment, taking a deep breath. You’re trying to calm yourself down.

“Leave me alone,” you say while opening your eyes again.

Now, Jungkook is the one taking a deep breath.It’s not always easy for you both to raise the little man, and right now is one of those moments. He’s scared to hurt you again in those moments, and you clearly don’t deserve it. You’re discovering maternity under those exceptional circumstances and hurting you even more will only make things worse.

“Leo is now sleeping in his little crib,” he tells you. “You were right, he’s better there.”

Lately, your ex has been trying to be gentle with you. No matter how you’re feeling, he’ll let you take it out on him. The situation you’re both in is tricky but he wants you to know that he’s there for you. That you’re not alone.

“Okay, just let me take a shower,” you reply.

“Okay but if you need anything, let me know.”

Jungkook leaves you alone, and you enjoy that moment to calm down. For sure, you need it because you don’t want to explode for something as little as this. Afterwards, you leave the bathroom with your pump, and the little bottles with your milk. The first thing you do is go to the kitchen to put the milk in a small bag and indicate the day and the hour of the milk withdrawal. You place it in the freezer and then, you quickly go to your room.

Leo is sleeping in his crib, he seems so serene. Your ex placed a little blanket on him, and you caressed the right chubby cheek of your son. You’re proud of yourself to have survived so far and to have kept him alive this far. He’s so big now compared to when he was born, which is normal but it always impresses you how much he has grown in such a short amount of time.

After checking on your son, you join his father in the living room. You sit next to him on the couch, he’s wearing a shirt now and you’re thankful for that.

“I’m also sorry for my reaction,” you tell him. “Leo was finally sleeping on you after you struggled so it was normal you didn’t want to move.”

Since Leo’s birth, you and Jungkook have been communicating a lot. It’s a good thing because it has been helping you tremendously to navigate this all.

“Don’t worry,” he answers, “I guess we’re both to blame here.”

“And please try to wear shirts when I’m around,” you add.

A smile appears on his face. He noticed the way you were hungrily looking at him, he’s also been doing it from time to time. He still finds you extremely attractive, and seeing you with your son makes you even more attractive. He wishes that things were different, he wishes to have never broken your heart because he’s convinced things would have been easier.

“Well, the skin-to-skin contact is important,” he replies. You roll your eyes, he’s such a tease. “But don’t worry, I’ll try to wear a shirt next time,” he winks at you.

There’s no doubt something is happening between you. The little spark is coming back and you’re simply letting it consume you both. None of you is trying to push the other off. It almost feels like nothing has ever happened.

“But if I do so, you’ll have to cover your chest every time you breastfeed,” he adds.

Right there and then, you understand what is going on and maybe because of the hormones being all over the place, you don’t feel like stopping him. He’s making you feel desired, and damn, right now, you desire him more than ever.

“And if I don’t want to?” you teasingly ask.

A smirk appears on his face. He gets closer to you, your eyes closing when you sense his warm breath against your skin. It instantly sends shivers down your spine.

“Then, I might do unholy things,” he whispers in your ear before biting your earlobe. “Unholy things that our son can’t see,” he adds.

His lips press a gentle kiss on your neck, right under your ear. Your arms wrap him, bringing his body closer to yours. His lips leave a trail of kisses from your neck to the corner of your lips. Your heartbeat increases while you breathe faster. His eyes meet yours. They are filled with lust, something you haven’t seen in a long time. Honestly, that simple gaze gets you wetter.

Now, you desperately crave him.

His lusty eyes understand it and in a blink of an eye, he presses his hungry lips against yours. Even though you’re both fully driven by desire, this kiss is soft and tender. It’s not bestial at all like it could have been. In fact, you’re actually convinced that if you rush it, it will destroy the magic behind this exact moment. His strong arms wrap tighter around you almost as if he’s scared to let you go.

His lips are so soft on yours, the tenderness of the kiss making your heart melt completely. You honestly missed being kissed by him because nobody compares to him. Your heart is pounding extremely hard in your chest while the butterflies in your lower stomach are making you feel completely alive. Your hands cup his face while you kiss him passionately.

If someone told you a year ago that you’d be sitting on his couch while kissing him intensely, you would have laughed so loud. And probably, you’d start crying in your bed because it would cause a lot of pain to picture kissing him again. And if anyone told you that you’d have a baby with him, you’d die instantly.

Slowly, Jungkook pushes you to lay on the couch. In a matter of seconds, your shirt is pulled out and his greedy lips find their way to your nipples. They pleasantly torture you, and you don’t hold back your moans. At this moment, you completely forget that you have a son sleeping not too far from you.

Your back arches, bringing your body closer to his mouth. Your baby daddy doesn’t spare you at all, he tortures you in a way that only he can do. Your hands are running through his hair, almost as if you’re trying to hold onto something. Now that you’ve become a mother, your breasts are super sensitive so this torture is driven crazier than it used to.

On top of that, it’s the first time you’ve been intimate with someone since your son’s birth. It’s also the first time another man other than your son is touching your breasts. This moment is making you feel like a woman again, something you had completely lost when you became a mother. For the past months, you’ve been first and foremost a mother, a desperate one but the woman part has been put aside. However, Jungkook is bringing back that side of you, and it makes you feel alive.

Slowly the nipple sucking turns into you getting naked. It turns into him thrusting into you like there’s no tomorrow. For hours, you make love, completely forgetting everything. You’re in your own bubble. A bubble you should probably never have created but this feels exquisitely good. Having Jungkook in between your legs burying his cock deep inside you is like being in heaven.

Your body has completely changed since Leo’s birth, and having sex with Jungkook helps you to explore what this new body sexually adores. But nothing compares to the feeling of his hand touching every part of you that has changed, and his lips too. However, what warms your heart is the way his eyes stare at your body. They glow so much, and it makes you feel desirable again.

For sure, the way you see your body shouldn’t be defined by the way a man looks at you, but it helps to embrace this new body even more. Yes, you’re thankful this body provided everything Leo needed, especially since you didn’t know he was there. Yes, you’re thankful you delivered him safely. Yes, you’re thankful it gives Leo everything he needs in his first months of life. But your body changed and it’s a body you have to discover all over again.

Your body isn’t just your home anymore, it’s Leo’s too.

Everything is different and everything feels different. This new body is more sensitive so having sex is a hundred times better than before. Sex feels even more intense. And god, let’s not start talking about doggy style. Orgasms are coming one after the other. Everything is overwhelming but in a good way.

Jungkook, on his side, finds you even prettier than before. Surely, it has to do with the fact that your body carried Leo for nine months and is now providing him with all that he needs. Having sex with you also feels more overwhelming for him. He’s been desperately holding back his orgasms to not come like an idiot after 3 seconds.

After having all that sex, you simply lay on the couch next to each other, heavily breathing. You’re simply staring at the ceiling in silence for a moment. Then, Jungkook grabs the baby monitor to take a look at your son.

“Even with all the noise we made, this kid slept,” he says with a heavy breath.

Your eyes glaze at the baby monitor, and a little smile appears on your face. Your baby daddy puts it back on the coffee table before grabbing a blanket to place it on both of your bodies. You offer him a little smile and you rest your head on his shoulder. This intense activity tired you out a lot. It’s best to try to sleep a bit before Leo wakes up.

Jungkook is standing at the entrance of the private school that Arya is attending. As surprising as it sounds, he took a paternity leave combined with the annual leaves he’s entitled to take, even if he’s the CEO of Jeon Industries. Being present as a father in his child’s first months of life always mattered more than anything else in the world. Those leaves surprised the entire world but the company can survive without him for a little while. He hired the best people so he trusts them.

Once all those leaves are over, he’ll run the company from home. Going back to work with a baby who cries a thousand times at night is quite hard, and he already looks like a zombie. Since he’ll work from home, he’ll choose when to work and when not. At the end of the day, he’s the big boss so he can do whatever suits him. But right now, his priorities are his children and you.

“Daddy,” Arya says while running in his direction.

A bright smile appears on his face. Lately, he’s been trying to adjust to this whole new dynamic. It’s hard trying to spend as much time as possible with Arya when Leo captures all the attention. At first, she was a bit jealous of her brother but slowly, she’s been accepting that she has one now. She’s been trying to help, she gives you the diaper when you’re changing Leo, and she speaks to him when he’s crying. She’s doing what she can and it’s adorable.

Jungkook places himself at her level to catch her. The days he has her are the days he’s the happiest because he’s surrounded by the people he loves the most. Even if he’s extremely tired, he’s extremely happy. Having a surprise child is absolutely not easy but slowly it’s getting easier.

“Princess,” he says when he catches her.

Nothing can compare to feeling his kids in his arms. Leo is still very small but when he holds him, he simply feels at peace, the same way it feels to hold Arya. But then, there’s you. Having you in his arms feels like being home. His heart is reassured whenever he holds you tight, and he always tries to provide you with the same feeling when you’re crying. In the past six months, he has seen you cry a thousand times and each time has been heartbreaking. Most of the time, he also ends up crying because you’re both completely overwhelmed by the situation. When it happens, you’re also the one holding him tightly.

Leo has brought you closer than ever.

However, it’s in a totally different way. You’ve become super close friends, and it kind of makes this situation easier to deal with. For sure, there’s a lot of pain from the past and it’s hard but you’re closer. What definitely changed your relationship is the sex. Since you had sex for the first time after your son’s birth, something deeply changed. After that time, you only made love one other time but you’ve been pretending like nothing ever happened. Because you both know that it’s mostly a physical need.

Jungkook would be lying if he said that he doesn’t think about it quite often. When he lays his eyes on you, he’s brought back to those two incredible moments, and he wishes he could repeat them. But there’s a limit, especially since you’ve been trying to figure your life out. He noticed how things changed between you and Yeonjun. He’s fully aware that it is because you slept together and you don’t know what to do anymore. However, he's 100% sure that it’s not even in your mind to get back with him.

“How’s your day going?” he asks his daughter.

The little girl starts ranting about her day at school while he holds her hand and walks with her to the car. Eunji left Arya’s belongings at his place earlier today. She’s been quite helpful since your son’s arrival, and it’s been more than appreciated. Any help received right now is more than welcome. Eunji understands that this is a very complicated situation and she’s been trying to adjust as well. Most of the time, Arya only spends the day here and sleeps at her mother’s so she isn’t woken up at night by Leo. This was an agreement the three of you made. Of course, there are days where she spends the night here but it doesn’t happen quite often. However, tonight, she’s going to sleep at her father’s place, and she’s very excited. The reason you all agreed is because it’s friday and tomorrow she doesn’t need to go to school.

Jungkook helps her to get inside the car, and as every day, she requests to listen to Part of Your World from the Little Mermaid, her favorite Disney movie. By now, you all know this song since you play it all the time. Her father doesn’t understand how she isn’t tired yet to listen to it on repeat. No doubt that he is tired of it! As they arrive home, Arya rushes to the living room to see her little brother. Luckily for her, you’re there, sitting on the couch and breastfeeding Leo.

A bright smile appears on your face when you see her. She quickly caresses her brother’s hair before pressing a gentle kiss on his head.

“Hi, baby brother,” she whispers. Her little eyes look up at you and a big smile appears on her face. “Hi, yn.”

“Hi, little monster,” you answer. “I’ll give you a kiss once Leo’s done eating.”

She nods and sits next to you. Your eyes move to Jungkook who’s putting down his daughter’s backpack. His eyes meet yours for a brief moment before quickly looking down at your breast. When you notice it, a little laugh leaves your lips while you shake your head. It’s funny the way he’s always mesmerized by your breasts. If there weren’t the kids, he would have probably said or done something.

After Leo’s eaten enough, you made sure he burped. Then, Arya asked if she could hold him, and of course, you helped her hold her little brother. She’s always adorable and it warms everybody’s heart that she takes her big sis role very seriously. You’re thankful your son has Arya as a sister. She definitely has the biggest and most wonderful heart in the world.

For dinner, you and Jungkook prepared lasagna much to Arya's delight. She mentioned a lot of times that it was absolutely good and she also spoke a lot about her friends because one of them is throwing a little party for their birthday. She sounded extremely excited which was cute.

Once both Arya and Leo are sleeping, there’s just you and Jungkook in the kitchen. He’s drinking wine while you’re drinking a beer without alcohol.

“We have to talk about what we’ve been doing,” you tell him.

For the past few days, it has been on your mind to talk with him about the two-night stands you had. If it happened, it’s for a reason and you also need to discuss it with him because you’re a bit lost. You’re falling in love with Yeonjun but there’s Jungkook and you’ve been sleeping together. It kind of makes you feel guilty although you’re not in a relationship with him.

Jungkook nods and takes a sip of wine.

“I know I wanted it and I don’t regret it at all but there’s Yeonjun,” you start saying but before you can add anything, Jungkook interrupts you.

“Listen, I’ve seen how confused you have been those past few days and I know it’s because of what we’ve been doing. What is going on is complicated, we suddenly had a son and we suddenly started living together. We share a history so for sure we’ll forever be attracted to each other in a way,” he says. “But don’t start pushing Yeonjun away because of me. He’s the right one for you.”

It hurts to say those words out loud but truth being told, it’s better you try something with Yeonjun than him. He’s scared to hurt you once again and he’d die if he ever does it again. He wouldn��t be able to live with himself because you’re the best thing that has ever happened to him. Being friends is the best solution for you.

“He’s been treating you better than I ever did so you should give him a chance. We’ve been pretending that nothing happened and it’s best we keep doing it. Don’t torture yourself any longer and just try. I’m sure you’ll be super happy and that’s the thing you deserve the most. I never was the right one for you but he has been the second he came into your life,” he finishes.

A tear runs down your face. This Jungkook in front of you is such a more mature version of him than the one that broke your heart over a year ago. This man is the one you have always wanted to see but now it’s too late. Your heart beats for Yeonjun. You were scared that having sex with your ex meant that you were falling for him all over again. However, now that he is saying those words, it makes it clear that it is just an illusion. You’re still falling in love with Yeonjun but you simply had a moment of weakness due to the complicated situation that you are in.

“And please don’t feel guilty, you didn’t cheat on him or anything. But I hope that all of this will help you to see things clearly,” he adds.

You stand up and hug your baby daddy. In the end, the birth of Leo helped him to get more mature, that’s what you think. But the truth is that you’re the reason behind his growth. Jungkook needed to be present for you, he needed to be your shoulder to rest on while you were trying to figure out how to become a mother. You simply needed him, and he had to grow to be what you needed the most. Jungkook had lost you and all he could do was to make sure you’d be happy. Even if that meant without him.

8 years later

Today is Leo’s 8th birthday.

A bright smile appears on your face when your eyes land on him. He’s running all over Jungkook’s living room with his friends. He’s such a big boy and you’re proud of the little man he has become.

“Mommy,” as those words are pronounced, you feel a little hand pushing your dress. You look down to see your second born, Levi.

“Yes, sweetie?” you ask before grabbing him to hold him in your arms.

Levi is the son you had with Yeonjun. He’s 4 years old and is a miniature of his father while Leo is more of a mix of you and Jungkook. So most of the time, people don’t believe them when they say they are brothers. However, that isn’t the case when it comes to Arya and Leo as they both resemble their father in a certain way.

“Can I have cake?” he asks.

“Not yet,” you answer. “You’ll have a piece after singing happy birthday to Leo, okay?” you tell him.

The little boy nods before asking you to let him go. Hyejoo, the mother of Taehoon, one of Leo’s friends, joins you. She has become a very good friend of yours and she has been very present in your life for the past year. It’s been almost a year since you and Yeonjun broke up, and let’s say that it hasn’t been easy at all. For a bit over a year, the relationship has started to deteriorate. At first, it was a bit due to the monotony but you both tried to find a solution. It worked but only for a short time.

Yeonjun lost his job, he started drinking instead of finding a new job. Your income was then the only one coming in. Obviously, it became hard to live with only one income and a drunk boyfriend. You tried to make him realize that he needed to move his ass but it only made everything worse. Trying to reason with an alcoholic is like talking to a wall. He got defensive and you were constantly fighting. In the midst of all that, you were trying to protect the kids but they could sense and see that everything was different.

One day, you vent to Jungkook with whom you became good friends. Since he’s literally one of the wealthiest men in the country, he offered to help you. You couldn’t refuse since you had to feed two little monsters but that made things even worse. Yeonjun suddenly became jealous of Jungkook. That was the last straw.

He never had any reason to be jealous of Jungkook. It was your ex, the romantic love between you was long gone and he is now a friend. But above anything else, he is Leo’s father. You never wanted any stupid tension between them since there are kids involved. The three of you always made everything work out for the kids and a simple job loss threw that all away.

Today things are still complicated with Yeonjun but the break-up was his wake-up call. From there, he started getting his shit together. Temporarily you agreed to let him live with you but he had to quickly find a solution which he did. All along, Jungkook was there as he’s been doing for the past 8 years. He has been your shoulder to lay on when you need it the most.

“How are you?” She asks.

“I’m fine,” you tell her. “Seeing my boys excited about this birthday party truly makes me happy.”

Seeing them happy is all that you need to be happy. Nothing else matters.

“But you know, this date always has a bittersweet taste,” you confess. “It was one of the hardest days of my life.”

Even though you love Leo with all your heart, it doesn’t change the fact that his birth was one of the most arduous days of your life. It will forever be like that, and every birthday will be a reminder of that day. A day you endured physical and emotional pain and a day you didn’t want him to come. When you look at him, being so happy to celebrate his birthday with his friends, it crushes your heart that you didn’t want him at first. But that’s the truth.

“Well, it’s more than understandable,” she says.

Your eyes move to Jungkook, who is speaking with some friends. He has changed a lot over the past 8 years. He has grown into a very mature man and it amazes you to think how different he is now. Nine years ago, he broke your heart. Now he’s the one amending it. He did a lot of work on himself, he faced all his demons and fought them. And he did it for himself, he didn’t use the stupid reason of ‘it’s for my kids’. He finally understood that he needed to take care of himself first.

In the midst of all that internal work, he found a girlfriend, Jihyo with whom he’s still with today. She’s a sweetheart and you love her. She’s definitely the one he needs. You’re so happy that he found her, he deserves his happy ending. A couple of weeks ago, she told you that she’s convinced that he’ll propose to her any time soon. Even though he’s your ex, you’d be glad to assist at his wedding. Jihyo and Jungkook have been together for 5 years which is a record for him.

“I know but it’s complicated to remember that day,” you add. “But seeing him this joyful today eases all the pain that was brought on that day.”

Jungkook joins the two of you, he greets you with a bright smile and the three of you talk about the kids. Hyejoo has 4 kids, the oldest is 10 years and she’s complaining that he’s started to not listen to her. She’s getting worried about how it will be during his teenage years and also soon after Taehoon will become a teenager.

Leo’s father explains to her how he has been dealing with Arya who’s almost 15 years old. It’s sometimes quite difficult, you’ve seen it with your own eyes but she’s still that adorable little girl that she was when she was younger. She’s just growing up, experiencing love, having her hormones all over the place, and having her first periods too. Compared to Jungkook at that age, she’s a saint. Plus, she adores taking care of Leo. She likes picking him up at school, preparing a little snack when they’re home, helping him to do his homework, and watching series and movies together. She also sometimes takes care of Levi whom she considers too as a younger brother.

At some point, Hyejoo leaves you and Jungkook alone. Both of you are still keeping an eye on the children running around everywhere.

“Jihyo isn’t coming today?” you ask.

Jungkook’s smile completely disappears and you instantly understand that something happened. You wouldn’t go so far as to say they broke up but by his face, it definitely looks like it.

“No,” he replies. “Not today nor any other day,” he adds.

It breaks your heart to hear that they aren’t together anymore. They were just right for each other but if it’s over, then there must be a good reason.

“Do you want to talk about it?” you gently ask.

“Not now,” he says while shaking his head. “Let’s enjoy this little party and we'll maybe talk about it afterward. This day is already tough for us two and I prefer we celebrate our son.”

You nod, understanding that he doesn’t want to talk about it now. A breakup is never easy, you’ve experienced some and it was always hard. The last one being quite rough, especially since Levi was involved. You wished things were different but it is what it is. At the end of the day, what truly matters is that you and your children are happy and living in a healthy environment.

The rest of the afternoon goes well, Leo being super happy to celebrate his birthday with all his friends and family. Yours and Jungkook’s parents are also present, they wouldn’t miss their grandson’s birthday. They spoil him quite a lot but it’s normal, that’s what grandparents are supposed to do. This afternoon is a success and it warms your heart.

Exceptionally, Leo and Levi are sleeping at Jungkook’s place and right after the party, they crash down in Leo’s bedroom. Of course, Leo’s father hired a cleaning company to clean his place. That’s the perk of being wealthy.

Once everybody is sleeping, you and Jungkook sit on the couch with a glass of wine. This has become a tradition for the past eight years. It always feels good and you also place a picture you took of the three of you in a photo album. With it, you can see how much your little man has changed over the years.

“He has grown so much,” Jungkook says as you watch all the pictures.

“Indeed, and he’s such a gentle and sweet boy,” you add.

Jungkook quickly looks at you and takes a sip of wine. Things have changed a lot for the past 8 years but he’s delighted with how things have turned. Well, he’s just sad that in the end, neither your relationship with Yeonjun nor his with Jihyo worked out. He still remembers vividly how happy he was when you were both in healthy relationships after all the chaos that yours was. But it looks like you'll have to start all over again from scratch.

“We did a very good job despite how everything started,” he says.

“I still remember the day he was born like it was yesterday,” you reveal.

It’s also the case for him. It was very complicated to become parents under those circumstances but he’s so proud of all the work you did. Once you live separately, you try even harder to make everything work out for Leo. That meant having difficult conversations and a lot of disagreements but in the end, it was worth it.

“And it broke my heart seeing you in so much pain,” he confesses. “It wasn’t just physical, it was emotional as well and the only other time I had seen you like that was when your sister passed away. Right there, I knew that you needed me more than ever and that I couldn’t mess up again.”

It’s the first time Jungkook is telling you that. You weren’t aware he felt like that but he was there for you, he was your savior. There’s no doubt that without him you wouldn’t have survived the first year. It was intense on a lot of levels but you learned a lot from that period of your life.

“You never told me that,” you tell him.

“I never saw the point of saying it,” he says with a little laugh. “For me, it was obvious. I already had a daughter, I kind of knew what to do. It was a shock for me and it took me some time to adjust to that new reality but you were completely overwhelmed by the entire situation. It was normal to be your shoulder to rely on,” he takes another sip of wine.

“Without you, I wouldn’t be here today,” you admit.

It warms his heart to hear those words. Of course, he already knew that because he saw how much you blossomed afterwards but it’s always nice to hear it from you.

“Well, I gave up on you a bit after your sister passed away. You pushed me back but I should maybe have stayed instead of leaving. But when you were giving birth to Leo, he was also my son, and abandoning you would have been very cowardly. I also made sure I would forever be there even if you pushed me back,” he professes.

“I’m very thankful you were there even when I was exploding,” you rest your head on his shoulder.

This year, the conversion is quite deep. Usually, you simply talk about the funny events of the year and laugh a lot with a glass of wine. No boyfriends and girlfriends are allowed, it has always been a moment between you and Jungkook. Those moments have contributed a lot to reinforce your friendship.

For a moment, you stay like that in silence. This year is different. Neither of you has a reason to end this moment. You don’t have Yeonjun waiting for you at home, and Jihyo isn’t waiting for Jungkook upstairs. This year there’s just the two of you. And it feels nice because you can truly savor this moment.

“I don’t know if I ever told you that I wanted to have a child with Jihyo,” he starts saying. You shake your head. “We were very good together and I wanted to build a family with her but it all fell down. That’s what really hurts me today,” it breaks your heart to hear that. “She was expecting a proposal but I never did it, and to be honest, I don’t even know why. I loved her and wanted it all with her but I was unable to get married to her. We had a fight a month ago and she brought up that she’s kind of waiting for a proposal that never comes. I confessed to her that I can’t for unknown reasons and she got even angrier because she knew why.”

You frown and stand up straight to glance at him. You’re a bit confused about how Jihyo would know why he wasn’t able to see himself getting married to her.

“It was because of you,” he says with a little voice, his eyes staring deeply at you. “She told me that since the beginning of our relationship, she knew that I was still in love with you in a certain way. It was obvious for her but with time, she saw me falling in love with her so she believed things changed. However, she realized she was wrong when the proposal was never coming. She realized right there that I’d never marry her because subconsciously, I was still waiting for you.”

Your heart is beating like crazy in your chest, and you feel your cheeks getting on fire. In his jealous phase, Yeonjun told you more or less the same thing but you thought that he was so wrong. Although, a tiny part of yourself was convinced that he was right. You thought that he was overreacting because Jungkook is Leo’s father and you would never accept Yeonjun attacking him. A good relationship between the three of you was deeply important for you because of Leo and Levi. However, maybe you were wrong. Truth being told, you broke up with him because you were still in love with Jungkook.

“And now that you were single, there was absolutely no point in me being with someone else,” he adds.

Jungkook gets a little closer to you and places his hand on your tight.

“She broke up with me and it hurt a lot, especially since I was convinced that it was ridiculous but she didn’t change her mind at all,” he continues. “I really thought she was delirious but then, I started to deeply think about it. I analyzed how I was acting around you, and how I was feeling when you were there. I was quick to realize that she was right, I was subconsciously longing for you.”

His fingers caress your tight. Your entire body is reacting to his words, this is a heartfelt love confession, and damn, it warms your heart in a way that you can’t even express.

“I’ve been waiting for you for eight years, yn,” he confesses out loud. “And I think I might wait for you my entire life because, since the beginning, it was you. It has always been you and nobody else. I just was an idiot to have let you go twice but maybe, it wasn’t the right time for us. I know now that if you ever give me another chance, it would be the perfect time.”

You place your hand on top of his, your eyes quickly glance at them before you look up at him. Jungkook is glowing right now in a way that you’ve never seen before. You fell for this man 20 years ago and since then, you never fell out of love for him. Since the beginning, he was the one holding your heart. As he said, maybe it was never the right time and you both needed to grow up before the perfect time would come.

You know now that today is the perfect time.

The past 8 years, you built a solid friendship, you faced the hardest obstacles together and you both worked a lot on yourselves. Today, you’re both different people, and these versions of yourselves can finally fully love each other.

“I feel deep inside of me that now is the perfect time,” you admit.

And without any hesitation, Jungkook kisses you passionately. This kiss feels completely different, it feels like you’re kissing for the first time ever. Maybe it’s because you’re different now and you need to discover each other all over again. The kiss is gentle, not rushed and you can taste the wine on his lips. Being kissed by Jungkook brings you to heaven, and you always loved being kissed by him. Slowly, you fall on your back on the couch, your hands running through his hair while you never stop kissing.

For a moment, he breaks the kiss to look at you and rub his nose against yours. Soon enough, he presses his lips against yours for a languorous and fervent kiss. This could go a lot further but you both know that if you want to make it work this time, it’s not a good idea to have sex now. Sex is never the solution. So, Jungkook ends up laying next to you on the couch, a bright smile displayed on his face.

“We always finish doing something on this couch,” he playfully says. “There must be something on this couch.”

You turn your head to look at him.

“Maybe someone put a spell on it,” you answer.

“Well, you put a spell on me, that’s for sure!” He tells you before kissing you once more.

He’ll never grow tired of kissing you. Your lips are his favorite thing in the entire world, he could spend hours kissing you.

The past few weeks, you’ve been flirting with Jungkook and going on several dates. It feels like things are falling into place, you’ve been talking a lot, enjoying each other's presence and simply being in love. You’ve never been this happy in your entire life, you adore being around him. This time around feels super easy. Of course, you haven’t said anything to your children because you don’t want to give them false hopes although Arya has been suspicious of what’s going on. She already noticed something had been happening when you were leaving Leo at his place one day and she raised the question. However, you denied it.

Also for the past weeks, you haven’t had sex at all. To be honest, it surprises you a lot because you’re both very attracted to the other but you’ve been putting that aside to build a healthy relationship. You both desire to make it work this time so there are a lot of efforts to be done on both sides. Maybe more on his side than yours but still, this is something you work on together. You’re two in a relationship and it takes two to make it work.

Today is Valentine’s Day and you’re going on a date together. Arya has nicely accepted to take care of her brother, and Levi is staying with his father. Jungkook is taking you out to a fancy restaurant, and you’re honestly super excited to spend this evening with him. You put on your prettier red dress and he’s wearing a very fancy black suit. He looks absolutely hot in that suit, you always loved watching him in a classy suit.

The restaurant is obviously full but people aren’t talking too loudly. There’s a band playing some romantic songs, and it definitely creates a lovey-dovey atmosphere. You’re absolutely delighted to be celebrating this Valentine’s Day with Jungkook.

“Before we take this relationship to the next step, I really want to apologize for how I acted the last time we were trying to be together,” Jungkook starts saying and you nod. “At that time, I had spent 10 years waiting for you to come back and I never truly thought about the eventuality of it really happening. So, when it happened, it was overwhelming because I simply didn’t know what to do. But it’s also because I had never done the proper work on myself before letting you back in my life.”

This conversation is one that you have been waiting for years. You never forced it because you always judged that it had to come from him and not from you. Forcing something will always have the opposite result but you’re glad that it’s happening now.

“Well, now looking back, I can confirm that it’s true,” you jokingly reply.

“Back then, it seemed a lot easier to push you back. Having you back was so overwhelming that I wasn’t even able to properly do my job. It was never your fault, it was mine. I was immature and a total jerk. I hid behind the excuse of wanting to put my daughter as a priority when I should have made you my priority. I hurt you a lot and I’m very aware of it so I made sure to never do it again.”

You grab his hand on the table to squish it. This man right here seems to always find a way to melt your heart.

“Your happiness is the only thing that always mattered to me, and I made it my priority. Even when we were friends, I did it. That’s also the reason why I convinced you to try with Yeonjun, I saw the way he was making you happy. Also back then, I would have never been able to give you that happiness otherwise I would have fought for you. And I also didn’t deserve you, I guess I never did,” he confesses.

The last sentence definitely breaks your heart. You want to contradict him but for sure, back then, he didn’t deserve your love because when you gave it to him, he just threw it away. But today, things are different. He has shown you in many ways that he has changed and that he deserves to be loved. That he deserves your love.

“Don’t say that, Jk,” you tell him with evident sadness in your voice.

“It’s the truth, yn,” he replies. “You’re such a strong and wonderful woman, you went through so much and you’re still standing tall with a big smile on your face. I never faced half of the things you did but still managed to act like a dick. I’m proud that you’re Leo’s mom so he can have you as an example and just be wonderful like you which he’s already proving to be,” a smile appears on his face while thinking about his son. “Even if I hurt you, I would do everything the same way because I got to be Arya’s and Leo’s father and I got to grow with you by my side.”

Jungkook changed a lot, that’s sure. You’re not sure he would have said that 8 years ago but things are different now. Leo really changed everything but in a good way. Without him, you’re not sure you’ll be sitting in this chair today. Maybe you’d still hate Jungkook but you’re sure of one thing. You would have found your way to him. You never truly believed in things such as destiny but with Jungkook, it’s different. You always knew that you were destined to be together.

Jungkook could be saying all those words in vain without meaning them but the way he’s been acting lately ⏤ and also since Leo’s birth ⏤ proves that everything he’s saying now is the truth. You believe him.

“If you were saying this right after you had hurt me, I would have never believed you,” you start saying. “But it comes years after and I got to witness your growth. However, it doesn’t mean that it’s going to be easy. Like you said, you hurt me and ever since, I struggle a bit to trust you. I feel like at any moment you could do it all over again,” Jungkook nods. “We’ve been having a very good time and I really want to keep doing it because I always loved you as well.”

A smile appears on his face.

“I promise this time around you won’t regret it,” he whispers.

The rest of the time in the restaurant goes well. You laugh a lot, speak a lot, drink a lot, and eat a lot. This is a wonderful moment. One that you won’t easily forget. Afterward, you both decide to spend a little extra moment alone in your apartment. It won’t last long because you'd rather not leave Arya alone with Leo for too long. Well, honestly speaking, you simply want to have sex because the physical attraction together with alcohol isn’t quite a good combination. You just can’t resist the other like you’ve been doing for the past weeks.

As soon as you pass the entrance door, you jump on each other’s lips in a very fervent and needy kiss. Jungkook’s hands lift up your dress, definitely not wanting to waste any second. His fingers directly find their way to your panties, and the mere contact of his cold fingers with your warm pussy sends shivers through your entire body. When you sense him, you realize that you’ve been desperately craving this moment for a while already.

His fingers rub against your pussy, causing a trail of moans to leave your mouth. Your moans are a melody that he’s been longing for a while. Just the sound of it makes him grow harder in his pants. In the rush of desperately desiring to have sex and not leave the kids alone for a long time, you walk backward until reaching the dining table and you fall on it. You’re now laying on top of the table. Jungkook removes your panties and simply pushes down his pants and underwear. By reflex, you open your legs and Jungkook instantly places himself in between.

None of you speaks during this moment, there’s just the sound of your heavy breathing echoing in your apartment. He doesn't need much prompting to start thrusting into you. The two of you moan like crazy, you definitely don’t hold back since you’re alone. There’s absolutely no need to withhold.

Your baby daddy thrusts deep inside you and it causes the table beneath you to squeak. But to be honest, you couldn’t care less about that. You’re simply enjoying this extraordinary moment together, and it’s wonderful to feel him deep inside you. Everything feels wonderful with him. Quickly, an intense orgasm hits you, provoking your entire body to shake. The man you love senses it, a greedy smile appears on his face but he keeps going. When you have an orgasm, it simply brings him closer to the edge.

However, the orgasm + the pleasure clearly makes you orgasm even more. It’s orgasm over orgasm, you can’t stop yourself. You’re overwhelmed with pleasure and you don’t ever want to stop it. You just let it go. The feeling of it makes him desire to completely explode inside you but for sure, he needs to ask you first if you’re okay with it.

“Can I come inside you?” Jungkook asks.

You can barely say ‘yes’ but you still manage to say it. In the moment, you don’t care where he comes, it’s the least of your problems. And with your simple answer, Jungkook lets it go. His orgasm hit him violently, this little quickie was what he badly wanted.

For a brief moment, you stay like that. He goes to the kitchen to grab tissues for the two of you so you can clean yourselves from all the juices that come out from your bodies.

“That was intense,” you say while cleaning yourself.

“More than intense,” he replies, a little laugh escaping his lips.

“We should do that more often,” you suggest.

Jungkook shakes his head while still laughing. For sure, he won’t be the one complaining about having more often sex with you.

“Maybe I should head home so Arya doesn’t go too crazy with Leo,” Jungkook adds.

Obviously, you won’t go with him. Things need to be done slowly and even if Arya has some suspicions, it’s best she doesn’t know yet. This time around, there are three children involved and there is no space for acting like idiots. This brings a lot of happiness to you but they should know when you’re both confident that it will work.

“Yes, you should,” you reply with a little smile.

You stand up and rearrange your dress before walking in his direction to be closer to him. He’s zipping his pants and looks up when he notices your presence. His arms wrap around your waist, bringing you closer. He presses a gentle kiss on your forehead, your eyes automatically closing for a brief moment.

“This night was wonderful, yn,” he whispers. “I adored the moment spent at the restaurant, and I want nothing more than to repeat it.”

You press a soft kiss on his lips.

“There’s nothing more I’d love to do,” you answer.

A smile of true happiness appears on both of your faces. This night will for sure be a moment you’ll forever cherish. None of you will ever forget because this night is the night where things finally took the right turn. After this night, your relationship kept blossoming and turned into the most wonderful thing in the world. Of course, when you told the news to your children months later, they were extremely ecstatic. Seeing them that way made you realize that this was all you ever needed.

It took you 20 years to find the right time but eventually, you found it. You were the right person for each other but it was never the right time. Timing is such a complex concept, however, it was time that allowed you to grow and fall in love all over again. You were each other's right person but it was too soon. You needed to experience all the things you lived before being brought back again. Leo’s 8th anniversary was the moment you both realized that it was finally the perfect time for you. Since the beginning, it was simply a matter of timing.

#bts #bts imagine #bts imagines #jeon jungkook #jungkook #jungkook imagine #bts angst #jungkook angst #bts fluff #jungkook fluff #bts smut #jungkook smut #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #perfect time #timing series #spideyjimin

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kingtomura · 3 months ago

Text

From Water to Wine

summary: It’s so obvious — so glaringly obvious and you can’t believe the realization hit you right here, right now as Tomura makes you come undone on his tongue in the warmth of the morning twilight.

You love him.

Fuck.

Cw: Tomura shigaraki x female reader, quirkless AU, established relationship, smut with plot, lots of plot, jealousy, insecurity, hurt/comfort, oral (f! receiving), make up sx, confessions, a ton of kissing, not sorry, toxic environments, piv, overstim, creampie, begging, bad parental figures, toxic parenting, mdni

wc: 9.4k | crossposted to ao3 | part 4 of the strict parents au (one, two, three)

If someone had asked you a year ago where you saw yourself right now, you would have given them a million different answers.

None of them involved your current reality.

You would have never thought you would be right here, right now — in your boyfriend’s shabby basement drinking with his friends while they smoked and argued about the latest game releases.

And they were an interesting set of friends.

“Bullshit, what the hell do you even know about games?” Tomura spat, pointing a finger and splashing a bit of beer from the bottle he held in his hand.

The one you’ve come to know as Dabi just smiles that same grin that makes Tomura’s eye twitch in irritation and shrugs his shoulders. “Hey, not my fault some of us prefer first person shooters.”

The conversation between them carries on and you find your mind drifting away — way too focused on the way Tomura has his arm wrapped around you with his free hand pressed against your hip, pulling you closer and making your cheeks flush deeper than what the alcohol already has.

You like when he gets this way — a little louder and a little looser with his words. It's all a precursor to what will happen tonight, when he’s a little rougher and presses into you so much deeper.

You’re not sure if it’s the alcohol, but you find yourself lost in the thought, biting your lip and watching the way Tomura’s heavy lidded eyes narrow as he focuses on his argument with Dabi.

You can’t help but stare when he gets like this, the gleam of fire in his eye when he argues, never backing down when he knows he’s right.

It’s alluring.

The giddy feeling you have only grows and you know its because tonight Tomura will fuck you in a way he only does when his grin is a little too wide and his eyes are a little too low.

You feel more emboldened and your words are looser when it’s like this. Eager to speak up in the argument, defending Tomura against Dabi’s quips and its fun.

It’s different to be able to speak so freely around people who would never judge you like your old stuck up friends would have. They all came from good families who have high expectations. Anything outside of the normal would be mocked and expelled.

You feel so free here.

With Tomura — with all of them.

“Whatever you say, freak.”

“I'm sure it takes one to know one.” You shoot back and the room breaks out in laughter, even Dabi holds up his hands in surrender.

The smug grin you wore only widened as Tomura leaned in and kissed your temple, proud that you can hold your own against the biggest smartass in the room.

Himiko stands from her place on the couch with Spinner, laugh dying down, but smile remaining on her face. “Wow, Tomura, I like her way better than your other girl.”

You feel your grin slide off of your face as fast as it had arrived.

Other girl?

Tomura has never mentioned another girl besides you.

The concerning comment makes your mind race with endless possibilities, the cycle only being broken as Himiko announces her departure, unaware of the inner turmoil she’s just thrown upon you.

“Jin doesn't like when I stay out too late so I’ll see you all later!” Her voice is high and chipper as she bounces towards the door.

“Hey, tell your brother don’t forget what he owes me, crazy girl!” Dabi yells after her, Himiko only returning a small wave and exiting the room.

There’s a lull in the conversation, only being broken as Spinner dies in his game of Mario Kart, too drunk to focus, but all the more determined to win.

“Damn it!” His frustration breaks through as he stands to his feet, “I almost had it!”

Dabi nods, clearly unbothered by the outburst and walking over to him, “work on it next time. It's getting late and I'm tired.”

“What does that have to do with me?” Spinner asks a little too loud, his intoxicated state more obvious as the minutes went on.

Dabi only shrugs, throwing an arm around his shoulder and leading him to the door. “Can’t let you walk home like this and risk getting snatched up now can I, princess?”

You vaguely register Spinner’s retort as Dabi throws a hand up in a wave and leaves as well, leaving only you and Tomura in the room.

What would have been exciting has become a weight in your stomach, leaving a pit of dread as your mind raced with Himiko’s words.

Some other girl. Someone before you. A girl who’s already met his friends, who has already been in your place. It brings a different kind of feeling to your mind that you’ve never really experienced.

The only thing that grounds you is Tomura’s shuffling as he stands and kisses your forehead.

It’s as if that one kiss dispelled the thoughts poisoning your mind and replaced them with the warm feeling you usually have when it comes to Tomura. The feeling that is only heightened by the strong sensation of alcohol.

You unsteadily trail behind him as he laces his fingers in yours and leads you out of the room and towards his.

The path is a familiar one and the giddy feeling returns as you race through the familiar corridors with him.

His home feels like a maze and the alcohol makes everything feel so much more fun. Your giggles and hurried footsteps are the only thing echoing throughout the halls as you chase behind him, eager to reach his room and come undone under his familiar touch.

Tomura has a habit of surprising you, though.

You blame the alcohol for your dulled senses as you don’t expect him to stop before his bedroom, turning to press you into the corridor wall. A small gasp leaves you at the impact and you don’t have time to react before Tomura is gripping your thighs, hiking you up against the wall and pressing you so much closer.

The whimper that escapes your lips would embarrass you any other day, but today you can’t bring yourself to care. It only spurs Tomura on as he presses forward, kissing you with a fever you hadn’t expected him to be withholding. The urgency of the kiss only shows you how much he may have been holding back during the get together.

You let out a soft moan as Tomura bites your lower lip, only to soothe it with his slick tongue in the next moment. Your arms wrap around his neck as you tilt your head, desperately seeking more of him as this heated endeavor grows with every passing moment.

His hands travel up your thighs and along your sides, gripping anything and everything he could, pressing his clothed erection closer to your core and giving you more needed friction as he grinds against you.

The way his hands slip under your shirt and massage your breasts makes you gasp again and Tomura takes this opportunity to press kisses along the column of your neck, loving the way he can finally leave as many marks as he wants.

You’re in his home — there were no rules against marks. There were no rules at all.

You close your eyes, getting lost in the feeling as Tomura licks and kisses along your neck, burying your hand in his ashen locks and weakly rutting your hips against his, craving more of him in any way possible.

“So needy,” he breathes against you and you have to bite back a whine at his low tone.

Tomura has you right where he wants you and it’s obvious. The more you ached for it, the more he would drag it out to tease you. There was nothing you wanted more than for him to rip the shorts off of you and take you right here, but you know it’s not that easy.

“T-Tomura…” you try to keep it together, show him that you can be coherent even with the fuzz of alcohol muddling your mind.

He pinches a nipple between his forefinger and thumb, this time drawing a yelp that you just couldn’t contain.

His low chuckle reverberates against your neck, sending shivers all the way to your spine as slick between your thighs is beginning to soak through the material of your panties.

“So sensitive, baby… you’d think I've been denying you.”

But you can’t help it. You wish you could cry out to him that your body just reacts like that for him, but you didn’t trust anything to fall from your lips besides a moan, so instead you keep quiet and hope he would give in to you sooner rather than later.

Tomura trails kisses from your neck to your jaw, and then ultimately back to your soft lips, enjoying the feel of them against his. You knew this was always his favorite part.

It was soft, it was intimate, and it was yours.

Yours…

Your brows furrow at an unwanted thought, but you press on — pulling Tomura closer and flicking your tongue against his lips, knowing he would pull closer and deepen the kiss.

He does and you’re grateful.

The way his tongue dominates your mouth makes you mewl into the kiss. A welcome distraction from your increasingly loud thoughts.

Tomura groans, bringing a hand down lower and lower until he reaches your clothed cunt. His finger presses against the thin fabric of the shorts, testing the waters of your sensitivity and loving the reaction he received in return.

His touch makes your breath hitch, the feeling alleviating a bit of pressure that's been building up deep within you.

You need more of it.

He pulls away again, trailing those soft kisses along your jaw and down your neck once more. It’s something that would usually make your heart flutter, but right now your mind is beginning to trail off, again.

It’s the idea of your boyfriend with some other girl that haunts you. Someone before you. Her hands on his, doing the things you’ve grown to love with the boy you—

You squeeze your eyes shut.

You don’t want to think right now. You just want to feel. You just want Tomura to take you and make you feel good so you can stop fucking thinking—

“Hey.”

Tomura’s sharp tone snaps you from your spiraling thoughts, bringing you back to reality.

“What’s going on?” His voice is rough, as it usually is, but he is not frustrated. The narrowed glare in his eyes would make anyone else believe he was irritated, but not you.

You know Tomura’s expressions like the back of your hand. He’s worried.

“I..” you pause, words lost on your tongue. What could you say? Jealousy is an ugly trait to have. “What do you mean?”

Tomura doesn’t buy your feigned ignorance.

He pulls away further to get a better look at you, his hands resting on your thighs, the soothing motion of them tenderly rubbing up and down the exposed area makes you want to relax under his touch.

“Why are you distracted?”

Your eyes cut to the side and you turn your head, unable to meet his ruby red gaze. The fear of admitting something as petty as jealousy eats at you.

“I’m not.” You mutter, the lie not fooling your own ears. You’d be naive to think it would work on the one who taught you how to lie in the first place.

It's clear he could see right through you and your eyes close at the soft touch of his hand along your chin, turning your head back to face him.

His eyes soften when they finally meet yours — the action is so slight you almost miss it.

“You’re upset.” It’s a statement of the obvious, but you still bring yourself to nod, worrying your bottom lip between your teeth and hoping you could bite it hard enough to taste the iron of blood. Anything to distract you from the white hot humiliation that this conversation will bring to you. “Why?”

You inhale, knowing Tomura is not the type to let it go. Knowing he would keep you here all night if he had to so that you would speak your mind.

“Himiko…” you mutter, dropping your eyes once more as the threat of tears begin to form along your waterline.

“Himiko?” The complete confusion in his voice makes you more upset, he probably didn’t even remember what she’d said.

“What she said earlier,” your voice wavers at your words and your defeat is imminent. The tears have already broken their bounds and began to trail down your cheeks. Embarrassment be damned. “About your.. Your ex.”

You could practically see the cogs turn in his head as he recounted tonight's events — the alcohol no doubt impairing his reflexes.

His expression only makes the pit of anxiety in your gut grow, tight, but clearly showing signs of unease, “Oh, that.”

You nod, confirmation stinging.

“That was someone I dated in highschool. Back when I was a teenager for three months.” His gentle hand moves from your chin to your cheek, wiping the falling tears from your flushed cheeks. “I don’t even think she lives in Kamino anymore, and I don't care. Haven’t cared in years. It’s why we broke up.”

Your heart still feels heavy with the weight of jealousy as Tomura comforts you. It's a bitter emotion that you know you have no right to feel. This was all before you, it shouldn’t matter.

Even though you don’t meet his eyes, Tomura lets you down — your toes touching the cold hardwood of the hallway floor as he leans forward to press a kiss to your forehead.

It’s soft and it’s sweet in ways you know Tomura only reserves just for you.

“C’mon, lets go to bed,” he takes your hand in his, leading you to the bedroom you’ve grown to know so well. “I’m exhausted.”

And your heart beats in tandem with your steps as you make your way to the bed, your tears dried up as Tomura pulls you close, the warm embrace so much more soothing than you’d expected.

It takes no time for your eyes to close — your mind drifting off to sleep as the weight of your heavy heart is lifted by Tomura’s touch.

—---------------

There’s a window near Tomura’s bed.

It's big and it gives you the best view when the weather is dark and rainy. It also has a secret gift of shining the morning sunlight directly in your face and waking you up. Something that Tomura had remedied for himself by covering the window with blackout curtains.

You believe that one of you forgot to pull the curtain last night because the warm light of the sun’s rays cause you to stir from your sleep.

No, that can be ignored.

Something else is causing you to stir.

Something is making your brows furrow and your hips writhe as your lips part to pant at the feeling taking your breath away.

“W-what..” you mutter as you try to blink the sleep from your eyes, hand reaching down to investigate.

Your fingers meet the soft tresses of Tomura’s familiar locks just as his tongue makes direct contact with your clit, the feeling sending the wave of pleasure up your spine and causing you to cry out.

“Tomura..!” you cry weakly as you bury your fingers in his hair, back arching from the bed as he becomes more intentional with his actions, the excitement of waking you this way showing in his efforts.

You gasp as Tomura’s skilled tongue flicks against your sensitive bud, his hands coming forward to hold your hips in place as he relaxes against your soaked cunt — lazily lapping at your entrance as you struggle to keep yourself together.

It’s effortless, the way he pushes your body to come apart, knowing you were still fighting the remnants of sleep and fully indulging in your pleasure.

He gives your clit a soft kiss before moving to readjust on the bed, spreading your thighs wider as he watches your expression — his lips are glossy with saliva and slick, a small string of the mixture connecting him to your exposed cunt.

Tomura has seen you in many different ways, in many different situations, but to be here, exposed before him so intimately makes you want to shy away. It makes you want to look away and you bashfully attempt to close your legs.

If you were to keep going this way you may say some things you weren’t sure either of you were ready to hear.

You blame it on the morning fuzz in your brain.

There was no other explanation for the strong feelings you had within. The way they bubble along the surface of your words at every moment spent with Tomura. You know if you go longer with these feelings unchecked they would threaten to spill out and over — possibly tainting the comfort of your relationship with Tomura.

“Ah!” you gasp, eyes squeezing shut at the lewd way Tomura laps at your cunt, moaning into you as the slick muscle of his tongue pushes you further and further to your end.

Tomura is watching your every move, his carmine eyes observing the way your hips twitch at the sensations, the way you breath hitches as he sucks on your clit — everything.

You can’t help but fall into the pleasure.

Coming undone is inevitable.

You toss your head to the side, the building pressure in your abdomen causing your thighs to tense as your hand finds his soft locks once more. The grip you had on his hair was nothing short of painful with the way you held on, but Tomura took it in stride, groaning at the rough treatment.

He’s always liked when you were rougher with him.

“F-fuck, Tomura, I can’t—” your words are slurred as his tongue glides against your clit, the sensitivity heighented as your mind rushes with the strong feelings that have plagued you for months.

You gasp as the budding realization hits you like a tidal wave.

Your eyes clenched shut as the pleasure takes you over and under, dragging your muddled mind along as you come undone with Tomura’s touch.

It’s so obvious — so glaringly obvious and you can’t believe the realization hit you right here, right now as Tomura makes you come undone on his tongue in the warmth of the morning twilight.

You love him.

Fuck.

Your body shivers as you reach the end, climax overtaking you while Tomura makes it his mission to make a complete mess of you — only stopping when your twitches of pleasure begin to meld into overstimulation, causing your hand to weakly push his head away.

There were tears lining your vision as Tomura brought himself back up to meet you, slick lips seeking yours and you hungrily greet him, unbothered by your own taste gracing your tongue as you languidly lick into his mouth.

Your mind buzzed in the afterglow of an early morning orgasm and the idea of getting more from him entices you.

So much so that it makes you question why he hasn’t taken it further.

Instead, Tomura pulls away, granting you one more kiss before lying down on his side of the bed, his words beating you to the question that awaited on your tongue.

“Headache,” he supplies as you turn towards him, the morning sunlight from the window illuminates his pale tresses in an almost pastel hue — hair so white it almost looks blue. You want to reach out and touch him. “I drank more than I thought last night and arguing with Dabi doesn’t help.”

Your heart tugs at the memory, a warm feeling spreading in your chest as you’ve grown to love those late weekend nights with Tomura’s friends.

“I can bring you some water,” you offer, moving to stand. Maybe a little space would be good, it will give you a minute to think about the all consuming feelings that have flooded all parts of your mind this morning. “And some meds, too.”

Tomura hums in appreciation, turning over to face away from the sun.

You take that as your cue to go, but not before grabbing one of his oversized shirts and a pair of panties. Kurogiri shouldn’t be up at this time, but it would still be odd to walk around Tomura’s home naked.

The trek to the kitchen is a short one and you waste no time grabbing an empty glass and some medication.

Kurogiri was adamant about using one of those fancy water purifiers so it’s no surprise when you’ve fully distracted yourself, filling the glass and focusing your attention on the stream of water pouring from the refrigerator’s water dispenser.

It’s so distracting that you don’t notice the presence behind you.

“Oh, what’s this?” A deep voice behind you muses, catching your attention. The sound startles you so suddenly that you almost drop the glass of water. “Playing house now, are we?”

That doesn’t sound like Kurogiri, your thoughts race as you slowly turn to meet the mysterious voice of the man in question.

He is… intimidating.

He stands no less than twice your height with ashen hair that rivals Tomura’s. His eyes are even the same deep crimson of the boy you’ve grown to know so well. He eyes you with a tight smile, never straying from your gaze.

This must be—

“Are you Tomura’s friend?”

You nod, words caught in your throat, but you will yourself to speak. If this is who you think it is then it would be a bad idea to leave an impression worse than what you already have. “Yes.”

“I see. Would you be a dear and fetch him for me? I have a few words for him.” His tone is solid — even.

You couldn’t make out how he felt in this moment if you tried. The small smile on his face seems pleasant, but given the circumstances of a half naked girl in what you can only assume to be his home really brings you no peace.

So you nod again, hurrying off with the glass of water in your hand, forgoing the medicine and only wanting to be as far away from that man as possible. Something about him strikes fear into you.

Tomura is in the same spot you left him before your kitchen adventure, but he cracks an eye open at the sound of you closing his bedroom door with a little too much force.

“What’s wrong?” he drags, turning over to face you and squinting as he gets hit directly in the face by the sun’s rays. You should really close that curtain soon.

The walk to him is short and you hand him the glass of water, bottom lip worried between your teeth as you search your mind for the right words.

“Someone’s here.” You didn’t mean to opt for an ominous choice, but you had no other idea what to say. Tomura has never talked about his parents.

“What?”

“There’s a man in the kitchen. He wants to see you.”

This seems to click for Tomura as his eyes narrow for a second and then widen, ever so slightly, at the realization.

You don’t know if that’s good or bad.

He sucks his teeth, taking the glass from your hand and downing the water as you watch on. Tomura seems calm, but he also has a very good poker face. If this is his parent then you’re not sure how long you would be able to stay.

The idea of going back makes you shiver.

No, that’s not really an option.

Tomura moves to stand, throwing on a pair of sweatpants and shirt, frustration evident in the way he tosses his clothes on.

He gives you one more turn, words tight and brows downturned. “Stay here. I’ll be right back.”

You nod as he exits, leaving you alone in the silence of his bedroom. The beaming sun seems more comfortable than before, the warm rays dance along your skin as you play through every scenario that could come from their talk.

He could make you leave.

That's the first and most obvious way to handle this situation. You know that your parents would never in a million years allow someone to stay under their roof with their daughter. It’s unheard of.

Or worse, he could call your parents.

You’ve gone completely no contact at this point and it wouldn’t be too much of a farfetched idea that this man would call them. Especially if Tomura tells him about your situation in full.

But… he could be a nice guy.

This could all be a big misunderstanding and blow over, if given enough time. This is more of a pipedream than a genuine idea, but you would go crazy if you only thought of the negatives.

You don’t realize you’ve been pacing the room until you almost trip over a discarded shirt on Tomura’s floor. It stops you in your tracks and makes you look around to assess the state of his room.

It's not perfect and it definitely needed work when you moved in, but it’s not terrible.

You turn back to the door, as if Tomura would come bursting through with updates of the conversation at hand, but no. nothing has happened. Nothing has changed.

The quiet of the room drives you crazy — there has to be something you can do.

It starts off small, picking up a few loose articles of clothing here and there, and then it delves into picking up empty drink cans, making the bed, and even sorting the mess of his closet. All in the name of passing time.

By the time Tomura made his way back to the room, you have the space nearly spotless. He takes note, but refrains from commenting. Instead his next words shock you.

“He said you can stay.”

Your brows furrow. “I can?”

Tomura only nods, making his way back to his newly made bed and lying down once more, no doubt due to the headache still pounding against his skull.

“That’s it?” you press — this all feels too easy.

“Yeah, just wear pants more often.” He waves you off, turning over and gearing up to go back to sleep.

The comment makes your cheeks burn and you nod, even though Tomura can’t see it.

It feels odd, especially knowing your parents would never allow this, but you suppose not everyone lived under such strict conditions.

So instead, you push that uneasy feeling in the pit of your gut aside and climb into bed with Tomura.

His steady breathing is calming and the rhythmic sound helps you drift off as well, unable to shake the lingering of suspicion and uncertainty, ebbing away in the back of your mind.

—-----------

You’ve come to learn that Tomura is actually quite busy during the day.

He is currently gearing up to go to his internship at the hospital, and it’s been taking up a chunk of his time lately. For a couple months he’s had a break from it since the doctor he had worked under was taking time away, but now he’s back and he wants Tomura to be busier than ever.

It’s not that you mind. Of course you knew Tomura’s life couldn’t revolve around you, but it still left you with not very much to do.

On the days he has to go, you stay at home — your attention hopping from playing video games on his pc, to reading books then eventually cleaning.

It's given you a lot of time to think about what you want for your own career. You’ve started to think long and hard about how you envision your future. The reason you were home from college in the first place was because you needed the time to think.

But now you have nothing but time and it feels even more stressful.

The thought of having to decide your entire future on a whim is daunting.

What if you didn’t like where you were in five years? Could you start over?

Would Tomura still be by your side?

That possibility catches you off guard as you stop in your tracks.

Would he be by your side?

You’ve never been in a relationship at all, especially not a long term one. You were all in, but how does Tomura feel? Would it be odd to ask?

The plaguing thoughts seem to take root in your mind as you walk through the halls of Tomura’s home, hoping to find something to occupy your time and chase these feelings away.

You think of the basement, it’s where the other gaming systems were set up and it’s also a good change of scenery.

Yeah, that would take your mind off of it.

Or it would have.

As you set your sights on the hallway that leads to the basement, there's a voice that catches your attention. It’s deep and ever so calm, even when strained by the words being spoken.

“That's not good enough. I told you to keep him there as much as you can.” The voice hisses to the person on the other line of what you can assume is a phone call.

You stop in your tracks, just before you could pass the door of the room Shigaraki Senior was speaking from. Instead you listen in, putting your back to the wall beside the door and zoning in on his words.

“I don’t care how fast he tries to get the work done — he’s only doing that to get home sooner.” He pauses and takes a breath, frustration imminent. “I need them apart. He won't listen to me about it, but the sooner he gets bored of her, the better. I don’t have time for his little distractions.”

You have to bite back a gasp as the words ring in your ears.

A distraction..? You knew it was too good to be true.

“Right,” the voice carries on, calling your attention once more, “I understand, but if he is to be the next me he cannot afford to get sidetracked.”

You haven’t had much of a chance to get to know the head of the household, instead preferring to stick by Tomura and make yourself as unobtrusive as possible.

It felt as though you were walking on eggshells. As if you were in an orientation period and any misstep would lead to you tossed out onto the street — you would be food for the wolves.

But you knew deep down that there was always something to worry about. It was too good to be true, yes, but you couldn’t understand why he was letting you stay anyway.

There's a lull in the conversation before it picks up again.

“I suppose…” The man’s voice sounds like it's getting closer and you take that as your cue to go back to Tomura’s room — but not before you catch the sound of his parting words. “It seems I'll just have to try harder then, hm?”

You don't know what kind of games this man was going to play but you knew one thing.

You had to tell Tomura.

—-----------

It doesn't go well.

“No, Tomura, I heard him,” you whisper, the harsh sound of your voice cutting through the dark room, the curtains blocking the light of the incoming dawn as Tomura began getting ready for another day at the hospital, “talking about us.”

You look down, arms crossed and defensive. “He wants us to break up — and he thinks you’ll do it on your own.”

Tomura’s expression is a mix of shock and disbelief, probably unsure of why his father would ever want him to break up with someone who brings him so much joy.

“No, there’s no way.”

“I’m telling the truth.” you plead, putting on your best voice of reason.

“He wouldn’t do that. It doesn’t make sense.” His tone is snappy, clearly ready for this conversation to end.

But you persist. “Why would I lie?”

“I don’t know — why would you?” He shoots back and the retort makes your ears perk.

“I would never lie to you, Tomura, I—”

“Just stop,” he holds up his hand and the shock of it makes halt in your tracks. You’ve never seen him this agitated, or irate. “You don’t even know him.”

But I don't have to know him, the words echo in your mind, stuck on your tongue as you watch Tomura continue, one hand to his neck as he etched his bad habit into his skin.

He was starting to spiral.

“You’re not even giving him a chance! I know he wouldn’t do that — he cares about me! He's the only one who—” Tomura stops himself, frustration leading him down avenues you don't think he’s walked in years.

You reach a hand out, aiming to comfort his ravenous habit, aching to tell him what’s really been eating away at your emotions for the last few weeks, but Tomura only scowls, the harsh look so intense it makes you snatch your hand back.

He’s never looked at you with such disdain before.

“Whatever. I’ll see you later.” His tone is final as he turns towards the door and you watch as he takes a breath to calm himself down, lowering his hand from his now redded neck.

Your chest feels tight, words fighting on your tongue to admit what you’d been holding within. It’s eating you up inside how strong these feelings were. “Tomura, wait— I didn't mean to upset you.”

He pays you a glance, expression neutral and features school back to their default calm. “It’s fine. I’ll see you tonight.”

And then he’s gone, leaving you alone once more in the room that you’ve both begun to grow into. The desperate feeling in your chest fights for your undivided attention and you're beginning to wonder how long you can keep it at bay.

—----------

The night doesn’t feel any better.

Tomura’s return brings the tension from this morning and you’re positive he didn’t have the best day during his internship. It pushes the pressure between you further.

The air feels thick as you both move about in his room — you, scanning the books along his bookshelf for another manga to read, and Tomura on the floor with his notes from the day spread out in front of him.

Luckily for you, Tomura breaks the silence.

“There’s a dinner tonight — my father wants us both there.”

This piques your interest, eyes darting to his tense form. “Like a fancy dinner?”

Tomura shakes his head, adjusting the papers below with a bit too much force. He takes one flyer and balls it up, tossing it into the trash can near his desk as if the paper offended him. It’s crumpled, but you can still make out the words: Almighty Medicine.

“No, it’s just with us. Kurogiri will cook.” He pauses, features pensive as he decides his next words. “He wants to get to know you.”

Your heart sinks.

It sounds like a trap.

But you really didn’t want a repeat of this morning, so instead you suck it up and nod — even though Tomura couldn't see you. His gaze was completely focused on the papers below. His shoulders were stiff as he slouched to halfheartedly read the notes. You debate giving him some kind of massage to ease the edge.

You refrain, choosing to wait it out a bit more. The last thing you want is to stress him even more before the last minute dinner.

So with a resigned sigh you answer, “Okay.”

—---------

Kurogiri is a good cook.

It's the only thought in your mind as you absently stare at the food plated before you. Dinner tonight was filled with flavorful meats and vibrant vegetables. The rice was a perfect accent to the other options and any other time you would find yourself eager to dig in.

But not tonight.

No, tonight you can’t seem to find your appetite.

You only push your cabbage back and forth with your chopsticks and await the inevitable questions you're sure Shigaraki Senior will ask.

“Tomura,” his baritone voice breaks the silence and you focus more on your cabbage, “you seem tense. What’s the matter.”

There’s a pause, and Shigaraki Senior’s faux friendly demeanor is not lost on you. “I saw that asshole again today. His face pisses me off.”

His father frowns. “Yes, well. That’s just business. When you’re over the company you won’t have to see him—“

“That’s not the problem!” Tomura cuts him off and you hold your breath, you could never raise your voice at home, “He leads his hospital and he’s a provider.”

“And that is not the path I have laid out for you.” The words are calm and collected, no hint of malice or anger. It’s eerily calm.

“Yeah, whatever. When are you going on that business trip again?” Tomura snaps.

The tension in the air is suffocating, it's thick and it's tense. It makes you want to run away, your feet anxiously tapping as you will yourself to bite down the uneasy feeling.

The slow smile that creeps its way onto his father’s face makes your skin crawl. “You know, I believe I have more important matters to handle here at our home and in our town.”

“Great.” The sarcasm is evident in Tomura’s voice, dripping into the already strained air.

“Well, that’s enough about our family matters... how about you, young lady.” His sharp eyes catch yours and you feel like a deer in headlights. “How are your parents? Do they know you’re here with my boy?”

You feel struck by his words, the pang in your stomach reverberating through your body as you scramble to find the words to answer him. “Well—”

“They’re aware.” Tomura cuts you off, his glare is ice as he places his chopsticks down and leans back in his chair, arms crossed and eyes narrowed.

It seemed to be a challenge, one you are not prepared to back him up on.

You were never a good liar.

His father’s attention is snapped back to Tomura and you were sure anyone else would falter under that glare.

“Really? If it were my boy off staying with some young girl I would want to at least get to know the one who’s paying the bills.”

He only shrugs in response, false air of disinterest apparent as he picks his chopsticks up again, picking away at his food once more. “Well it’s a good thing she isn’t your child then, huh.”

You think the conversation is over — that Tomura has successfully dodged this bullet and you will be allowed a peaceful dinner, but things were never that easy for you.

“I think we should give them a call, hm? If she’s staying in my home I want to make sure they know all the details.”

You watch Tomura’s fingers twitch, irritation threatening to explode and you can’t help but think that’s exactly what his father wants to see.

It’s toxic, in a whole new way.

“Fine,” Tomura surprises you, your eyes cut to his stiff form, “since you’re so worried why don’t you go ahead and do it. I don’t get why you care so much anyway.”

His father seems unimpressed — that smile and those chilling eyes frighten you, it makes your blood feel like ice in your veins. “You’re right, Tomura. I shouldn’t care. And you know what? I won’t.”

You both look up, dumbfounded.

“I won’t care unless you both give me a reason to care. How does that sound?”

It sounds fantastic, in theory, but you know that it doesn’t matter how it sounds.

It’s blackmail.

The reality of the situation hits you then and there.

Tomura is combative with his father because he can be.

“I think that’s a fair trade, don't you, Tomura?”

But only to a certain extent.

Your eyes dart between the two of them as the weight of his words set in. Tomura is forced to comply — agree to his fathers terms or else. This is a battlefield you aren't familiar with — one of mind games and bad faith practices.

It is naive to think Shigaraki Senior will be sensible in what he decides are good reasons.

Your time here was limited.

The end of dinner was as stressful as its start: tense, awkward and very foreboding.

The stress of it all had Tomura pacing his room while you helplessly sat on the bed fighting the urge to tell him I told you so — that would help no one here.

“This is bullshit!” he starts, the frustration of his thoughts coming to a head and spilling out. “Give me a reason, yeah, whatever.”

Your brows furrow as you watch Tomura vent, his bitter words hanging in the air as you purse your lips — trying and failing to come up with any kind of solution for your situation.

“And why does it even matter that you're here? He’s hardly here anyway!” The perturbing scratching habit has made its return and this time you do stand to your feet, marching over to where Tomura paced and taking his hand.

As upsetting as this situation was, you knew that it wouldn’t do either of you any good if tomura destroyed himself in the process of understanding his father’s true intentions.

“Hey,” you try, reaching for his hand and refusing to back down this time. “We’ll figure something out.”

You’re surprised when he lets you, his carmine eyes lock with yours as his ever present scowl remains unchanged. “Yeah, like what?”

You try to ignore the cross tone in his voice, opting to just hold his hand and try again. You're beginning to realize this is uncharted territory for both of you.

“I don’t know, who was the guy you saw at your internship? The one who runs the other hospital and all? Maybe you could ask how he—”

“I am not doing that.” Tomura cuts you off, voice even more agitated.

Your brows furrow in confusion as you ignore his tone. You squeeze his hand instead, still trying to remain calm. “But you never know, Tomura. Maybe he could help you—”

“No! Why would I ask him of all people?” He snatches his hand away and you realize you’ve struck a nerve.

This wouldn’t end well.

“You don’t even know who he is, you don’t know what he’s done!” His voice begins to rise and you wonder if he’s aware of the hurt lining his words. There is a hidden history in this mystery man that Tomura has foregone informing you of.

You’re beginning to recognize a pattern — something about that fact gets under your skin.

“Maybe I would if you actually told me anything about your life, Tomura! You’ve barely let me in at all!”

And it’s true.

You knew nothing about his father, he doesn't talk to you about his internship and you don’t even know who this mystery super provider is. You’ve been in the dark for a while and you’re tired of it.

“And why should I do that?” He questions, becoming more and more defensive as the conversation carries on. “So you can use it against me?”

“What?” you gasp, baffled by his accusation. “Why would I ever do that?”

“I don’t know! Why else would you fucking care?”

“I care because I love you, dumbass!”

Both of you freeze.

You didn’t want it to come out this way.

You wanted the confession to be one of candied words and hushed whispers. You wanted it to be slow and romantic, maybe while Tomura was deep inside of you, hitting that sensitive spot that made you see stars.

But things were never ordinary when you were dating a man like Tomura Shigaraki.

In that moment you realize that maybe this was something you were willing to learn to live with.

“What,” Tomura’s voice is low as if speaking louder would shatter the still air within the room, “what did you just say?”

Your breath hitches, the buzz of anxiety and anticipation makes you hesitate. “I said.. I love you, Tomura.”

He takes a step forward, it’s slow but sure. You remain stagnant and still.

“Say it again.”

You do.

“I love you, Tomura.” The words are warm as they leave your lips and now he stands before you, his height forcing you to look up at him.

His carmine eyes shine with unbridled fervor that seems to be itching to make itself known.

You want to see him lose control.

So with a slow smile, you gear up to say it again, “I love y—“

You’re cut off by the press of Tomura’s lips against yours and the desperation in it pushes you back. Tomura is fast, pulling you closer to stop you from losing your balance. You feel lightweight as you wrap your arms around Tomura’s neck, tilting your head and deepening the kiss.

It’s intoxicating the way he maneuvers you, the way he makes you melt into the kiss, desperate for more — and he gives it to you.

His hands trail up your sides and back down to grip your ass. The action makes you gasp and Tomura wastes no time taking advantage of the opportunity, his tongue dominating your mouth as the heat between your thighs grows.

You moan into the kiss and lean forward as Tomura begins to pull away.

Your nose scrunches in confusion as he gazes down at you, lazy grin on his face.

There isn’t much time to mull over what Tomura was thinking, he takes your confusion in stride, using the opportunity to push you back, bottom landing onto the bed and bouncing once with the force of impact.

Before you can speak, Tomura is on you, lips against yours and pushing you down onto his dark sheets. You bring a hand to those familiar pale locks and close your eyes — allowing yourself to get lost in the feeling and finally release the pent up energy of your emotions.

Tomura is quick, fingers curling around the hem of your shorts and dragging them down with your panties in tow and leaving you exposed before him.

You gasp at the gentle touch of his index finger slipping between your slick folds and going no further.

“Tomura…” you try, pulling away from the kiss and hoping the hunger in your voice would be enough for him to continue.

He only gazes at you, eyes half lidded yet vibrant. You’re sure he’s put you in a trance.

“Say it again.”

“I love you.” you breathe and then gasp as he finally touches you.

His finger is gentle as he rubs slow circles onto your clit, the action makes your head feel fuzzy as the pleasure begins to rise.

Tomura leans forward to press kisses against the column of your neck, nipping and sucking along the soft flesh — no doubt trying to leave deep marks into your skin.

“Mm!” you squeeze your eyes shut as he picks up the pace, adding more pressure to his movements and slowly bringing you closer to the edge. Tomura is steady with his hands, he knows your body so well. From the inside and out so he knows that if he continues at this pace you would come undone way before you wanted to.

Maybe that's what he was aiming for.

His other hand is warm as he cups your breast, tweaking a nipple between his forefinger and thumb, knowing it drives you crazy. You feel dizzy as his fingers leave your clit and travel lower to your entrance, pressing not one, but two fingers inside and chuckling at your whine.

“What?” he teases, pumping the digits in and out as you writhe beneath him, “too much?”

You want to shake your head, tell him no, and that it's never too much when it comes to him, but the only thing you can manage is a pathetic whimper as you grip his dark shirt. “Please, Tomura.”

“Please, what?” you can feel his grin against your neck as he places another open mouthed kiss against your collarbone. “You gotta talk to me, baby.”

“T-touch me,” you plead.

He moves up so that he’s eye to eye with you once more. The grin on his face was just as you imagined it, smug and excited. “I am touching you.”

You close your eyes again, knowing exactly what he wants you to say. “Make me feel good, Tomura. Please.”

He likes that answer, you can tell by the way his eyes soften and his fingers twitch ever so slightly within you.

Tomura leans forward, capturing your lips in a kiss once more as he moves his fingers with purpose, his thumb now pressing against your clit as the sensation grows.

It's hard to contain your cries, but you try. His fathers words echoing in the back of your mind — the possibility of loud sex with his son being a reason to kick you out almost makes you laugh.

At this point it would probably be worth it.

“F-fuck,” you breathe as you lean into the feeling, your eyes flutter closed as you bring Tomura closer. Your peak is so, so close you can almost taste it.

Tomura would tease you any other time. He would try to drag it out in an attempt to see you squirm, but tonight he’s being so kind. He is so generous as he brushes against that spot inside that drives you crazy. He does it over and over again, making your toes curl in pleasure as the euphoric feeling takes you over the edge.

The elation of your orgasm makes you shiver and cry out, a wave of pleasure crashing over you as you lose yourself in him.

Tomura presses another kiss to your sweet lips, swallowing your moans as you cum on his fingers, soaking the digits in your slick and trembling in pleasure,

Once you come down from your high Tomura is quick to remove his clothes and you follow his lead, finally removing your shirt.

The feeling of his warm chest against yours is always so comforting. It brings a feeling of safety and security as he presses against you, his cock rock hard and dripping from the excitement earlier.

He places a chaste kiss against your lips as he rubs the head of his cock between your slick folds, the glide is smooth and you gasp every time he brushes against your clit. Your hands find his soft locks again as you begin to move in tandem with his actions, trying to get more of the feeling as best you can.

At this, Tomura pulls away, kiss swollen lips red and eyes soft, his words hold no bite, “Desperate, huh?”

You nod, in no mood to tease back and Tomura can tell. He feels it in the way you look at him, so he presses his forehead against yours, his pale locks falling against your cheeks.

“Again, tell it to me again.”

And you know what he’s talking about. You’re both so close, chest to chest and you swore your hearts were beating in tandem.

“I love you, Tomura.” you whisper and it's for his ears only.

Tomura groans, closing his eyes with a soft grin on his lips.

“Fuck…” he breathes against you, and that’s all it takes as he presses into you. The stretch of his cock makes you wince, but the smooth slick of your arousal helps him slide in with ease.

You hold on and allow Tomura to anchor you as he pushes forward, desperate to give you everything he can.

He bottoms out with a sigh, filling you completely as you bite your lip in anticipation — the pressure of feeling full is addictive. It doesn't take Tomura long to move, his eagerness impossible to hide as he pulls back, almost pulling out, and drives forward, rough and desperate.

It’s everything you've wanted and your body is greedy as you take in all of him.

“Yes, Tomura!” You fight to keep your voice down but it proves impossible as Tomura sets a brutal pace, fucking out every ounce of tension he’s held within for the past few days. You can feel it as it unravels with each and every trust.

Tomura adjusts ever so slightly and that's all it takes for him to hit that special place inside of you.

“A-ah!” You moan underneath him, ripples of pleasure cascading up your spine as his sharp assault on your sensitive spot carries on. The consistent sparks of pleasure have your brows furrowed and legs wrapped around his waist, desperate to pull him closer, to feel him deeper.

“Fuck,” Tomura mumbles and his low tone makes you shiver.

You know that you won't last much longer if he keeps this up, but you give up trying to hold back. You cannot stop the way your cries spill from your lips, echoing against the walls of Tomura’s bedroom and mixing with the sound of his urgent trusts.

The lewd noises rise as your cunt drips with arousal against Tomura’s push and pull thrusts. His heavy balls slap against your ass with the force of them and you close your eyes, falling into the rhythm.

You dont expect it when it happens, but it comes all the same — your orgasm takes you under, the overwhelming feeling of ecstasy capturing your mind as your lover fucks you through it.

He groans at the sensations, the way your cunt squeezes him almost sends him over with you, but he holds on.

Tomura lowers himself, slowing down as you ride out your high and his lips are close to your ear.

“Fuck,” he starts and you feel his hips stutter as he tries to regain his pace, sending you into overstimulation. Tomura knows you can take it — and he can’t stop now. He was so close to his peak. “L-love you.. So much..”

The words make your eyes widen, they are soft and slow as if unspoken for years and you can’t help but wonder how many.

“Tomura..” you whisper as you turn your head, craving his lips and his gaze.

Your eyes meet and you feel synced as you bring a hand down to his cheek, your heart racing as he leans into your touch.

Yes, you love him. Truly and deeply, you love Tomura.

He pushes forward, capturing your lips in a kiss as his thrusts grow more erratic, hungry for his own release as he groans against your lips.

It doesn’t take long — Tomura gives a few more strong thrusts and meets his end, cumming inside of you with a mewl that you drink up. The twitch of his cock is subtle but the pearly white ropes fill you to the brim, leaving you ruined and raw as he pumps it as deeply as he could.

Tomura pulls away from the kiss to rest his forehead against yours. Sweaty and sated you both try to catch your breath.

His bedroom is quiet and still, making you both feel as though you were the only two in the world. You know that it is deep into the night and Tomura would still have to wake up early in the morning, but you know none of that matters to him.

No, Tomura couldn't care less as shares this moment with you, the stress finally expelled from his body and the weight lifted from his mind.

His carmine eyes hold you captive as you melt into them and you realize then that you can’t see yourself anywhere but here — with Tomura.

It's a chilling realization.

Once you’ve both gathered your bearings and Tomura pulls out — taking his rightful place beside you, the overwhelming pull of sleep drags you along.

Tomura leans forward, placing a soft kiss onto your forehead with whispers of goodnight and his newly relaxed demeanor is contagious.

You know that you may be on borrowed time with him here, but that's okay.

Your eyes catch the crumpled flyer hanging near the trashcan by his desk, the words Almighty Medicine big and bold on the paper.

The feeling of sleep is heavy in your body, but your last thoughts are of a plan.

You know there’s a way out of here.

For both of you.

#shigaraki tomura #shigaraki x reader #shigaraki tomura x reader #tomura shigaraki x reader #mha x reader #shigaraki smut #shigaraki x you #tomura shigaraki x you #my hero academia #tomura x reader #my works

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breezymichelle99 · 2 months ago

Text

Deliciously Dripping in Jealousy | LN

Summary: A friends with benefits situation takes an interesting turn when someone gets a little bit jealous. A you fell first but he fell harder love story.

Warnings: SMUT!!! 18+: use of Y|N, friends with benefits, p in v, unprotected sex ( please use protection) blow job, fingering, male and female receiving, possessive Lando; Dom:Lando, demanding Lando,Toxic dates, a lot of cussing, use of the F word like a lot, Lando ends up being a little obsessed with you; begging; orgasm denial kinda, talk about car sex, talk about mental health; shitty race finishes; extreme jealousy, use of the word slut; Lando going thru it emotion wise; relationship communication.

As always if I’ve missed anything please let me know. I hope you enjoy. I had so much fun writing this.

You have been in this on again off again, friends with benefits situationship with Lando Norris for months now. And to be honest it really was nothing more than really hot amazing sex whenever he was home in Monaco. But Lately you had started to feel something more for him and you knew that he would never want anything more with you than just a good casual romp in the sheets, especially with where he was at in his career right now. So you decided to casually date other people; mostly to distract your own mind; however that wasn’t working out to well; because just like clockwork he had come home from a race in a far off country, called you immediately and without words you had found yourself once again wrapped around him in the front seat of his Porsche Carrera GT; somehow.

You didn’t even say a word when he kissed you slowly and dropped you off afterwards, few words shared between the two of you, like most times. You hadn’t even noticed that you had left your favorite black lace panties in his car. Damn it. You look at your watch you didn’t really have time to change, you were meeting with one of the guys you’ve been seeing and hadn’t had the heart to cancel even after hooking up with Lando. You sigh as you collect yourself and head to the bar where you were meant to meet your date. Everything Seemed to be going well; your thoughts of Lando had drifted somewhat and you were actually enjoying yourself. You had had a few drinks and were dancing close with your designated Lando distraction, he had pulled you into his lap in a dark back booth and was gently kissing on your neck, his hand squeezing your ass, Whispering sweet dirty little words in your ear that had you wiggling slightly in his lap.

You did have to admit, it was kind of nice being out with someone obsessed with you, someone not afraid to be all over you in public, but of course you couldn’t help but think about Lando. All the dirty little things you had done to each other in the dark, every time you were together, how he always made you feel like the only girl in the world even when he was fucking you senseless. And like clockwork or sexual calling your phone buzzed in your bag. “Excuse me.” you whisper, pulling yourself from your date's arms. You hear a quiet sigh leave his lips and you know he’s annoyed by the interruption. It was Lando. “Get out of his lap IMMEDIATELY!!!.” you read. You look around for him but you don’t see him anywhere. How the hell? You roll your eyes but of course you respond. “Why should I?” you type trying to be quick not wanting to ruin your night but also wanting to piss off Lando enough that he finally gets his head out of his ass and makes you his. It didn’t take long before he responded. “Because your panties were off and my dick deep inside of you two hours ago baby, now get the fuck off of him or else!”

He was furious and tempted to walk right into this bar and rip you out of this creep's arms and drag your ass out himself. He knew he had set the boundaries, knew he was the one that said no strings attached , wanted to literally come and go as he pleased with you whenever he was home, but seeing this man with his hands all over you, intentions to take you home and fuck you better than him. He absolutely couldn’t and wouldn’t stand for that; you were his and only his. He could feel the jealousy dripping from his soul as he tapped his fingers on the keyboard of his phone as he waited for your response, biting his lip. “Or else what?” you tempt him. He was parked outside the bar watching through the window. He watched you intently. He growled. “Y|N, you have approximately two seconds to get your ass off and out here into this car before I come in and drag your ass out. Get out here NOW!!!”

He tossed his phone into the cup holder, he was fuming now. He watches, green eyes dark with lust, desire, and straight jealousy. His jaw was clenched and he was tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. You were taking wayyyyyy too long. His phone lit up. “Coming.” you respond, not wanting to cause a scene, knowing he would make good on his promise to come in and drag you out. “Good Girl, now hurry the Fuck up!!” he demands fidgeting in his seat as he waits for you. You get out of the lap of your date. “I'm so sorry, something’s come up and I need to go.” you say pulling down the skirt of your short, little black dress, grabbing your things and laying down some cash on the table for your drinks; not wanting your date to have to pay for it since you were in fact cutting your date short.

“Are you kidding me?” he says looking pissed. “No I’m not. I'm sorry something really has come up and I need to go, now please let go of me.” you say trying to shrug out of his tight grip. He had grabbed you tightly and aggressively and refused to let go of you. Panic set in. Lando had had enough. He looked in through the window, seeing you arguing with your date, who had his hand on you in a way Lando did not like at all. He turned his car off and stormed into the bar; furious. When he reached you, you were still arguing with this man and his grip had tightened on you as you attempted to leave his grasp. Lando could tell you were uncomfortable. “Lando.” you whisper. Your big beautiful eyes begging for his help, knowing he would most likely make you pay for it later, you didn’t care though you just wanted out of this bar and into his arms as soon as fucking possible.

“The lady asked you to let her go, now do so.” His voice was deeper and darker than you had ever heard before and butterflies danced in your stomach at the tone. Your date locked eyes with Lando; challenge accepted. “What’s it to you mate, not like you were gunna fuck her right? Saw you get out of that Porsche, pretty sure you don’t need any help with that. Might leave one for the rest of us now, don’t cha think.” you couldn’t believe what you had just heard. Lando stepped towards the both of you. The look in his eyes had you dripping for him already. His jaw was clenched and you knew the words that this man had just said had sent Lando over the edge and you really should think about getting him out of this bar before he ruined his career. He cleared his throat. No one spoke to him or his girl like that EVER. “Actually mate.” he paused, locking eyes with you for a moment. “I have already fucked her, tonight actually, pretty Sure she was thinking about me inside of her when she was kissing you, and i'm going to fuck her again and probably for the rest of my life, so get your filthy hands off her and let me take my girl home, where i plan to fuck her again and again till she remembers who she belongs too. So if you don’t fucking mind.” he says two long fingers gesturing for you to come to him. Your mouth slack jaw as you do what you're told, coming to him. No words spoken,

“Fucking slut.” your date curses, furious. Lando smirks and chuckles as he tosses you over his shoulder, smacking your ass; which was almost hanging out of your tiny little black dress. “You’re damn right. And she’s all fucking mine.” he growls spinning you around and carrying you out of the bar and to his Porsche waiting outside. He set you down on the curb making sure you were okay. “ His warm palm and long fingers caress your cheek. “Are you okay?” he asks, his gaze intense and concerned. You smirk looking up into his gorgeous green eyes, you press your body into his. You hear him groan.

“No.” you whisper, eyes never leaving his. “No?” he questions. His hands begin to wander your body. A moan catches in your mouth. “What’s wrong?” What did he do? I’ll fucking kill him.” Lando threatens jaw tightening again. You chuckle. “He didn't do anything, you did.” you say, sliding his hand up your dress, not wearing any panties knowing damn well you had left them in his car earlier in the night. He swallows, feeling just how wet you are as he dips a long index finger into your folds. “Fuck Lando please, i need you to fuck me.” you breathe, breathless under his fingertips. He smirks at just how needy you are for him. He bites his bottom lip. “Hmmm.” he hums trying to control himself in the streets. He withdraws his fingers from you. You groan. “Get in the car Y|N” he demands, as you watch him place his fingers in his mouth licking them clean of you. You hear him whine and you can’t help the smirk that crosses your lips. He opens the door. You slide in. He watches the way your dress rides up your tanned thigh as you get in and he can’t help but lick his lips again. God he needed to get you out of here.

You look up at him with lusty eyes and he slams the door, you pout as he walks over to the driver side getting in without words. He starts the car and begins driving you to his place. The car ride is silent, neither of you knowing what to say. The sexual tension filling the car. Finally Lando breaks the silence and you know you are going to fight and end up hate fucking each other tonight. You roll your eyes. He reaches across the center console grabbing your jaw., making you look at him. “What the fuck was that?” he growls, catching your eye roll. You stare at him ready to go toe to toe with him, until he gives you what you wanted. You shrug not knowing if he was talking about your eye roll or your extremely shitty taste in men. You say nothing. Finally he realizes you’re unsure of what he’s talking about, so he elaborates. “You think you can just fuck me in my car and two hours later take home some complete goofball, like what we do doesn’t even matter.” he growls, you can immediately see the jealousy in his green eyes and you love every second, you can tell by his clenched jaw he’s pissed. But does he have any right to be? The angry sight of him has you clenching your thighs together.

You laugh and he looks at you confused. “You made the rules, Lando. You’re the one that didn’t want strings, you wanted to fuck whenever you were home in Monaco and then fly half way acoss the world and then pretend like i don’t exist. And yeah I agreed to this but you’re the one that wanted things to be this way, Lan.” his jaw unclenched at the sound of your sweet little voice calling him Lan. he knew right there in that moment that you had caught feelings for him. You sigh knowing what you had to do; lay it all out there on the table. “I don’t want to fuck strangers in bars, and have meaningless sex, especially when all I can fucking think about when i'm with someone is fucking you. Jesus fucking Christ Lando, you’re under my fucking skin, you’re everything i think about always. I thought surely I can have a little friends with benefits thing with you, have sex with you when you're home and then go about my life as soon as you hop a jet to the next race location. But i was fucking wrong Lan, boy was i fucking wrong. I Crave you every single second of every single day and not just the sex; your company, your voice, your laugh, the way you look at me with those damn gorgeous fucking eyes. Yes I tried to date other people, yes I tried to fuck other people but no one is you Lando Norris and I don’t want to do this hook up when you’re here and don’t exist when you’re gone shit anymore. It’s either me or it’s not.” you hadn’t realized that you had started to cry. His hand reached up to wipe the tears that had escaped down your cheek.

He had that stupid ridiculous boyish grin on his face and you didn’t know if you should slap him or kiss him silly. He took a deep breath. “That’s just the thing though Y|N.” he pauses watching you with those eyes that make you weak in the knees. “You do exist when I'm gone you’re all I think about, yeah I too have tried to hook up with other girls when I’m away but they weren’t you, nowhere close. They didn’t challenge me physically. They didn’t do that hip back arch thing for me that drives me absolutely feral and makes me hit all the just right spots deep inside of you, they don’t know just what I need when, or listen to me complain about racing, or talk me through my tough days and then let me lose myself between their thighs until they can’t breathe, or do that absolutely adorable little nose scrunch thing that you do, or when you wear my shirt around after we fuck like a trophy of your greatest conquest, how you just have to pet every single dog you see whenever we are out. I meant what what I said back in the bar Y|N. i want to spend the rest of my life fucking you all over the world, bent over exotic balconies in beautiful countries, the neighbors knowing my name every place we go. I don’t want to do whatever this is, any more. I just want you, always.” he says his lips devouring your lips before you could say anything. You’d been parked in his driveway for 10 minutes now. “Lan.” you whisper, pulling your lips away from his slowly. Your fingertips caress his cheek, your eyes locked with his. He melts into your touch.

“Yeah?” he whispers his voice low. “I love you.” you say. He grins against your lips. There is silence for a moment while you two stare at each other. “I love you too baby girl.” he says kissing you again and again until you moan desperately into his mouth. Finally he pulls his lips away from yours and smirks a wild little grin setting your heart racing once again. His long fingers dance across your lips, your tongue dances across his fingertips. “Mmm.” you hear him groan. He clears his throat regaining the power he had over you, pulling your jaw towards him once more. “Now get out of my car so i can drag that tight little ass inside and fuck you like my dirty little slut, as I fully intended.” he growls again, his green eyes darken. You lick your lips. “Yes sir.” you say getting out immediately. He’s to you in seconds, as you close the door you notice that your black lace panties, the ones you had been wearing earlier in the night were currently hanging over the gear shift. “Lando?” you question with a chuckle. He smirks as you are immediately thrown over his shoulder again. “LANDO!!!” you giggle trying to pull the skirt of your dress down since you weren’t wearing any panties. “Never getting those back either, baby.” he growls smacking your ass carrying you through the door of his flat and immediately up the stairs to his bedroom.

As soon as you reach the top of the stairs Lando puts you down and you strip out of your clothes, leaving a trail for him to follow all the way to his gorgeous bedroom. “Ohhhh Lando Norris, where are you baby?”” you call to him as you stand naked and waiting for him. “Mmm I'm coming baby girl, hold on.” he calls back as he finally makes it to the doorway where he sees you ready and waiting. “Mmm god you are beautiful.” he says, biting his lip as he walks to you, hands falling instantly to your hips. You can’t help but moan as soon as his long fingers touch your skin. “God I want you.” you whimper into his lips that have begun to kiss you vigorously. You had this feeling in your chest that he was going to make you pay for having another man's hands on what was his but you would gladly take your punishment like his good little girl. His long fingers grabbed your jaw roughly making you look at him. There was something wild in his eyes and you can’t help but groan. “You have no Idea what seeing him with his hands on you did to me baby, seeing someone else's hands on what is mine.” he growled. The eye contact between the two of you was almost too intense. “I I I I’m sorry Lando, I didn’t know what else to do I I I I .” you stumble trying to find the words as his long index fingers traced your folds now, dipping into you making you forget your words. He is laughing at you now. “Look at you, pretty girl, having trouble finding your words already.” smug bastard, he knew what he was doing.

“What’s that baby girl I didn’t quite hear what you said?” he smirks knowing you said nothing, moving his fingers faster than slower. Your words getting trapped behind your moans. You swallow hard trying to force yourself to answer him but you can’t, he feels too good. “Lando.” you whine. He chuckles. “Use your words darlin’, tell me how sorry you are, how you’ll never let another man touch you again, that you’re all mine always.” he growls one hand torturing you, fingers slowing down inside of you as he waits for his answer, the other with his long fingers gripped tightly around your neck, squeezing gently. He catches the little glimmer of desire in your eyes. You lick your lips. “How bout I show you instead.” you moan finally finding your words and dropping to your knees. Lando’s long fingers running across his lips, moaning at your taste on his fingertips. “Now that's a good girl.” he says looking down at you with a devilish sparkle in his eyes as he helps you undo his pants, and kick them aside. He runs his long fingers over your cheek as you look up at him, his thumb running across your lips. “I'm sorry Lando, I'm yours always no one but you will ever touch me again.” you managed, getting lost in his eyes. “Prove it.” he demands. You lick your lips, wrapping your fingers around him. He groans loudly. His hands falling into your hair, steading you. “Now now darling be a good girl.” he snarls. At this point you were practically dripping onto his bedroom floor, You were so wet for him. “fuck Lando.” you whine right before running your tongue along the underside of his throbbing member, circling the tip. “God you’re so fucking good at that.” he manages through moans as you take him into your mouth, his long length hitting the back of your throat, fingers working the rest. His hips buckle beneath your touch as he thrusts into your warm wet mouth. “God fuckkk please baby please, make me cum on that sweet little tongue of yours, you’re doing such a good fucking job baby.. Mmmmm fuck Y|N” your name rolling off his tongue was like music to your ears as you continued to work him until his warm salty cum was filling your throat. You swallow him, wiping your mouth. Looking up at him from the floor between his shaky thighs, eyes wide with lust and desire absolutely begging for him.

“God you’re beautiful like this, at my fucking mercy.” he growls, his thumb running across your lips. A small chuckle leaves his lips and you know he is up to no good. Silence fills the room as the two of you stare at each other. “But as much as I love to watch you beg on your knees for you me, I have much better plans for you Angel.” he grins deliciously down at you. “Lando please.” you whisper, your eyes never leaving his as they darken, a color you have never seen before and your body betrays you as you instantly react to his pleas. “Come on, up off the floor and onto the bed princess.” he says, extending his hand out to help you up off the floor, he pulls you up and into his arms, lips crashing into yours immediately. “MMM Lando.” you moan between his lips. He smirks into your mouth as he backs you up against the bed, you slide back allowing him to maneuver his tanned muscled body above yours, his lips kissing down your body setting your skin on fire as he goes. You can’t help but move beneath him. “MMMM don’t run from me beautiful.” Lando groans against your skin, not stopping his kisse.s but steading your body beneath him. “Please Lan I’m begging, I need you inside me please.” you whine, once again begging him., hips bucking up into him. He chuckles. “Patience baby I promise you’ll get what you want.” he smirks looking down at you, admiring your body, fingertips tracing every inch of you, making goosebumps appear on your skin.

“You are so beautiful baby.” he says his voice was deep and sultry, as his lips kiss down your body, leaving a trail of deep purple hickeys in his wake, marking his territory . “absolutely stunning and all fucking mine.” he growls. “Ohhh Lando please stop torturing me i am so fucking sorry okay now please.” you groan as he had now situated himself between your thighs. He chuckles. “I'm not nearly done making you pay, my darling.” he chuckles as he watches you pout. He began kissing down your inner thigh. Your breathing immediately became more erratic and he had literally done nothing but kiss you. “Mmm mmm mmm look at you baby girl, you are absolutely dripping already for me. How long have you been this wet for me darling?”” he asks his index finger dipping into your folds making you arch your back off the mattress into him. “Lan.” you whine. “Go on, tell me sweet girl.” he demands the British accent rolls off his tongue.. He pauses waiting impatiently for your response “Since the bar, since you came storming in to get me.” you practically whimper your response back to him as he continues to tease your throbbing clit. “You liked that, didn't you baby? Me being all angry and possessive over my girl?” he asks his tongue licking a strip from the bottom to the top of you. “Ohhh Fuck Lan, god yes.” you moan his name, your hips crashing into his mouth. Your fingers tangling in his curls tugging gently begging him to please continue and he does without needing words he devours you adding two of his long skilled fingers increasing your pleasure. “Ohhh god Lando, yes you are fucking everything to me, fuckkk jesus.” you call out to him as you feel the orgasm building in your stomach. He knew you were close but he had no intention of stopping till he had you cumming on his face and hand. His thumb rubbing your clit slowly adding to your pleasure. “There you go baby, be a good girl and cum for me.” he asks. Your breathing was erratic and your heart beat rapid as you did what you were told, moaning his name aloud as you did so. “Fuckk lan, god that tongue.” you whine praising him. He smirks. “That's just the beginning baby, when I'm finished with you there will be absolutely no question who you belong to, you’ll never even consider looking at another man.” he was really obsessed with the fact that you had let someone else touch you. It wasn’t even that serious and was mostly his fault, he had made the rules after all, but you did have to admit that this crazy wild feral side of him was so hot and sexy and with the way he was fucking you, how could you ever even considering letting someone else touch you, it would never compare to him, not even close and he knew that.

Before you can even recover from your 1st orgasm, he is above you once more throwing your leg over his shoulder. “Finally.” he hears you moan in anticipation. He can’t help but chuckle, such a needy needy girl. He lines himself with your entrance and before you even had time to breathe he was inside you. “Oh fuck baby, you feel so fucking good. So tight for me.” he moans leaving a trail of kisses down your leg he has resting on his shoulder as he fucks into you, your hips arching up just right off the bed, just the way he liked pushing him deeper as he hits that perfect spot and rhythm inside of you. “Ohhhhh Lannnnnn, god please..” you beg him. He slowed his pace drawing out your pleasure and his. “ That's it baby, Beg for it?” he says your eyes widen as you look up at him. A lusty grin crosses your lips as you run your tongue across them, you hear lando whine losing his composure but only for a second. “I want to hear you beg me to cum Y|N.” he growled, his pace nearly stopped as he challenged you. Your eyes flicked to his. You considered defying him but only for a second, you knew that wouldn't get either of you anywhere. “Fine.” you grit your teeth. He chuckles slamming into you again. “Ohhhh Lando please please please let me cum baby. Fuckkk please I need you to let me cum for you like your good little girl….” you moan out your words as his relentless thrusts send you crashing into your orgasm like you had been begging for. He tossed his head back as he too reached his climax, hips crashing together with yours as you both used each other to ride out your high. “Fuckk baby.” he says, collapsing practically on top of you, his chain dangling in your face as he leans down to gently capture your lips, you kissing him back slowly.

He settled beside you, pulling you into his arms, fingers running through your messy hair, your fingers gently running over his muscled chest as you stared into each other's eyes, both your breathing finally evening out as you enjoyed the peaceful moment between the two of you. You hear him sigh. He hasn’t taken his eyes off you since you finished rolling around in the sheets with him. You run your fingers gently across his cheek. “What is it, Lan?” you quietly ask him. He touches your face gently, getting lost in your beautiful eyes. He’s silent for another minute or two before he answers your questions. “When did it happen for you?” you look at him confused for a moment. “What do you mean?” you ask quietly. He smiles sweetly, the little dimples in his cheek, sneaking out, this thumb gently stroking your cheek.. He licks his lips and clears his throat. Like he was trying to find the courage to ask the question he was asking. “When did you fall in love with me?” he asks. You can’t help but blush. “Lan” you groan, giggles fill the room but He stares at you waiting for the answer. “To be honest.” you say trying to look away, the eye contact becoming too much for you. He tucks his fingers under your chin making you look back at him. You smirk.. “I liked you more than just a fling for a while but I didn’t really realize it till the night after the Monaco race.( which was months ago.).” you pause because he looks like he has something to say. “The night when we went for that long drive afterwards, in my new Porsche (at the time.) the top down, wind in your hair as I drove you through the streets making you sigh at every turn. When I could hear your laugh and your moans hours after you left me. That night?” he asks. He remembers it like it happened only yesterday and not months ago. You nod your head yes. “I knew the rules Lan, I knew we couldn’t be more, I knew you didn’t want more so I did the only thing I knew how to keep you with me and that was play the game, by the rules that we created.” you say melting into his touch. “I needed to distract myself from you, from you being my entire being. That’s why I decided to try and see other people but it didn’t matter there was only you, always.” you admit. He smiles. “So much for no strings.” he jokes. Of course he would make a joke about your feelings, that was such a him thing to do to avoid his own feelings.

The way that he was looking at you right now, you never wanted to leave this moment. “Was there ever a moment for you that you thought maybe you would throw the rule book out the window and make me yours?” you ask not really sure if you wanted this answer or not. You hear him quietly sigh. “Yes.” he practically whispers. You smirk at him. “Please enlighten me.” you can’t help the chuckle that leaves your lips at his sudden uneasiness. There was a moment of silence before he finally spoke. “It was right after the Austrian GP, when I had that DNF because of Max and I was so pissed and frustrated and I literally wanted to run through a wall.” he paused for a second as he watched you recall the night in your mind. You laugh. “We didn’t even have sex that night.” you chuckle. “We did in the morning, but not that night you came home, you were so worked up and angry i practically had to talk you down off the ledge.” you say with a soft smile. And you know why he chose this moment. “Exactly it was how comforting you were to me, how much you felt like home to me, how you literally just let me rant and rant and then made me pancakes at like 3 in the morning and then let me lay in your arms on the couch, running your fingers through my hair until i fell asleep in your arms, finally relaxing finally feeling peace..” he admits. You smile at him. “You thought I felt like home?” You ask ,you could feel the tears in your eyes threatening to escape as you thought about the fact that for months now you felt like safety, like peace, like home to him, like everything he had ever wanted and still he kept you at arms length. “Yeah baby, I really did since the moment I met you, your light, your sweetness, your passion, how i felt every single time I was with you.” his thumb stops a tear that has escaped down your cheek.

“If you felt this way about me why didn’t you just tell me.” you ask knowing this was a pot calling the kettle black moment. “I got scared. The way I felt i hadn’t ever felt that before and i thought if I kept you at arms length and kept to our rules much like you did, that i’d be able to tame this feeling that i had for you but i never could and then seeing you tonight at that bar, some guys hands all over you where mine should be, after you had just been with me so intimately, I lost it i know I had to make you mine or let you go and I knew I couldn’t live another second without you in my life.” he says. Admitting that his jealousy had been what finally made him cave and honestly you were more than okay with that. “Oh Lan.” you sob, kissing his lips wildly. “We are idiots, you know.” you chuckle pulling your lips away from his. “Well what do you say we change that.?” he asks. You eye him. “Meaning?” you ask in return. “No more casual bullshit Y|N. Let's be a couple, let’s fall in love all over the world. Just me and you against it." He says the sparkle in his green eyes was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen. “Yes lando, a thousand times yes.” you say kissing him again you couldn’t help it the man was just so damn kissable. “I never want to be without you on my arm. What do you say we make it paddock official this weekend at the Dutch GP?” he asks, you had slid your body over him, straddling him looking down into his gorgeous green eyes. “I would love nothing more, Lando Norris.” your lips crash into his once more.

After this moment you two become inseparable. You make your paddock debut at the Dutch GP that weekend. The atmosphere was insane and you loved nothing more than being on Lando’s arm, him so proud to be yours showing you off like his most prized possession. And not to mention his good luck charm because he would go on to win his second race of the season that very same weekend. You couldn’t be more proud to call him yours, especially knowing that you fell for him first but he fell harder for you. .

The End.

#moodboard pics are all from Pinterest I don’t own any of them #lando norris #f1 #f1 imagine #lando norris x reader #f1 fanfic #mclaren

414 notes · View notes

miley1442111 · 4 months ago

Note

heyy, i love your writing! I was thinking a rafe x fem reader, where Rafe says they don’t have anything, she was just a hook up etc when he was actually just scared of having feelings for a girl for the first time in his life. she gets with JJ to make him jealous and it works, but instead of being that mad Rafe Cameron he just open his heart and his fears to her (even end up crying a bit)

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mistakes and misjudgements

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a/n: hi! thank you so much for requesting! I love this idea!

pairing: rafe cameron x fem! reader

summary: i suggest you look at the request

warnings: kissing, toxic relationship, rafe is confused, cursing, drinking, suggestive mentions, mentions of rafe's addictions (i think that's it?)

not entirely proofread

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Rafe walked past the bar, his eyes searching for yours. You, the pogue bartender at the club, had caught the Rafe Cameron’s eye, and he wasn’t about to let you go.

He was met with Jj. His smile dropped, while Jj’s smirk rose.

“What can I get you, Cameron? A vodka cranberry? I can mix it with the blood of the people you’ve murdered?-”

Jj stopped talking when Rafe leaned in closer.

“Just a water, thanks.”

Jj nodded and walked to the fridge to grab him a bottle, and then you walked up, and he watched as Rafe’s demeanour changed. He was softer, sweeter, and funnier. Jj almost laughed out loud at the way Rafe pushed some hair back from your face, that sickly sweet smile on his face.

Jj moved you over, his hands on your waist and handed Rafe his water. “Water for the gentleman.”

Rafe’s smile dropped. “Thanks man.”

“Oh, Jj, this is my boyfriend, Rafe,” you smiled, introducing the two.

Bile rose in Rafe's stomach. Were you two dating? But that came with so much more than just the fun dates you two were indulging in. That would mean he’d have to be vulnerable with you. And the fact that you hated his drug use, something he’d been struggling to stop for a while now. And he knew you were too good for him, it was only a matter of time before you figured it out yourself and-

His mouth moved before his brain could stop it. “Woah,” Rafe deflected. “I’m not her boyfriend, we’re just… casual,” he shrugged.

Your face fell and Rafe had never felt so bad. “Right, casual.”

You hated that word. You hated how he used it. You hated how you thought, even just for a second, that you would settle for that.

Jj’s smile widened. “Well, there’s your water. See you ‘round Kook,” and with that, Jj turned his back on Rafe and turned to you. “You alright?”

You nodded, more annoyed than anything else. “He’s such an asshole.”

“I hate to say ‘I told you so’, but I did warn you-” before he could finish you hit him with a towel, which ended up in a towel fight in the bar, neither of you aware of the searing eyes of Rafe Cameron.

Maybe he’d fucked up. Maybe he did want to be your boyfriend.

Maybe.

Jj was appalled at what Rafe had done. Casual? What was wrong with him? He had the prettiest, kindest, most amazing girl on the island, if not the world, and he was throwing it away, for what? To fuck other people? That didn’t make any sense. So you two made a plan.

He was going to ask you out. Now, Jj liked you, yes, but as a friend. You liked Jj, yes, but again, as a friend. So you two could ‘go out’ with each other and make Rafe jealous. For the simple reason of principal, you had to make Rafe pay, it was only fair.

---------------------

When you walked into the party, you immediately found Jj and clung to him for the whole night. Everyone was talking about you two, especially since most people thought you were dating Rafe.

You two danced, drank, and even made out, and by the end of the night, you knew you’d sent a message Rafe’s way by the amount of texts you’d received.

Rafe: Wtf are you doing with him?

Rafe: Text me back.

Rafe: Stop being so close to him. Come talk to me

Rafe: Please Y/n.

Rafe: I got the fucking message now stop it.

Rafe: You have my attention, you always do. Get off of him.

Rafe: Please come talk to me.

Rafe: Y/n stop.

Rafe: Please.

Rafe: I know I fucked up, come on. This isn’t fair.

Rafe: I made a mistake Y/n, I’m sorry.

Rafe: Fuck this, I’ll be at Tanneyhill when you’re ready to talk to me like an adult.

Rafe: Please talk to me. Please.

You chuckled as you read through the messages, Sarah by your side.

“Oh my god! That’s why he was so upset leaving the party!” she laughed.

Your stomach dropped. Rafe shouldn't have been upset, he didn't care about you, right? You were just another girl he was talking to and planning on fucking, right? “What do you mean?”

“Oh yeah, Kelce was telling me he was super worked up and upset all night so he left. He didn’t even do anything but he was pacing the entire night. Top though he’d had a panic attack.”

“Shit,” you cursed under your breath. “Hey, I think I might call it a night,” you turned to the group.

“Aww come on! The night’s just started,” Kiara pleaded, you chuckled and shook your head.

“I’m tired!” you lied. “And I have work tomorrow.”

You needed to talk to Rafe right now.

---------------------

The walk from the beach to Tanneyhill was quick but full of quiet and anxious scenarios. You didn’t mean to make him upset, you just wanted to show him what he was missing. He embarrassed you earlier, and you wanted to get him back. You never meant to cause harm.

You knocked on the door, hoping he was ok, and internally hoping it would be him to open the door, considering you were wearing a very short dress that you knew Rose would turn her nose up at.

The door swung open to reveal… Rafe.

But he looked… upset? His eyes were red-rimmed and his nose was sniffly, he’d been crying. You’d made him cry.

“Hi,” he sniffled, and your heart just broke. Your Rafe had been crying over you.

You cupped his cheeks and pulled him closer. “I’m sorry,” you whispered and he shook his head, trying to hold back more tears.

“It’s fine,” he whispered, his voice hoarse and tired.

“It’s not. I’m so sorry Rafe,” you pressed a kiss to his cheek and that was all it took, the floodgates opened and he wrapped his arms around you, allowing him to be held by you. You sank down to the steps and let him cry into your neck for a few minutes. You softly brushed through his hair with your fingers and whispered hushed apologies and promises of everything being ok. After a few minutes he was coherent enough to speak. He pulled back, wiping his eyes with his hand as you sat beside him, confused and feeling awful.

“I got so… jealous for a while, seeing you and Jj at work. I have no idea why. A-and then at the party, I saw you two just laughing a-and ha-having fun,” he hiccuped. “And I realised that I-I’m not like that. I’m not f-funny. I don’t make you laugh. I’m not ve-very fun to b-be around.”

Your heart broke as you saw the little known insecure side of Rafe Cameron. Obviously, Jj and Rafe were different people, but you enjoyed Rafe’s dad jokes, just as much as you enjoyed Jj’s dry sarcasm. You and Jj had known each other practically since birth, so obviously you were more relaxed around him than with Rafe. Especially with Rafe, at the beginning you were so tense on every date, always worried that you were going to say the wrong thing, since this was your first real relationship.

“I love being around you,” you cooed, cupping his cheek. “I think you’re funny. You make me laugh all the time.”

He nodded. “B-but I’m not like that, I’m… different. I’m not e-easy to be with, with the d-drinking and the baggage, and the drugs. I know that, a-and I promise I’m trying to change, t-to be better f-for you, it’s just h–hard. A-and I’m so scared that I’m going to lose you i-if I do the wrong thing.”

“You’re not going to lose me,” you promised. “I swear.”

“But you and Jj-?”

“I was… trying to make you jealous,” you admitted, slightly embarrassed.

“Oh,” he sighed. “That’s g-good. ‘Cause I really like you. And I want you to be my girlfriend.”

You smiled. “I’m all yours Rafe, and we’ll work through it all together. I’m here for you, always.”

You took his hand in your and smiled.

His other hand came up to cup your cheek, and he pressed his lips to yours in a soft kiss.

You'd get through it all, together.

---------------------

obx masterlist :)

navigation for my blog :) (criminal minds, obx, the bear, marvel, top gun, the hunger games, challengers :)

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pumpkin-writes · 28 days ago

Text

— ୨୧ yeah, yeah, fuck you too

pairing: rafe cameron x pouge!reader

warnings: 18+, nsfw, toxic!established enemies with benefits relationship, toxic!rafe, drug use, oral ( m receiving ) use of petnames ( baby, princess, babygirl ) filthy dirty talking, hair pulling, face fucking, deep throating, gagging, crying but like happy crying, cumshot, rafe is a huge asshole but it's okay bc his dick big

word count: 2.1 k

notes: this was heavily inspired by this moodboard i made. this sat in my drafts foreverrr & i wanted to just get rid of it so i didn't proofread it but i hope y'all can forgive me & enjoy this non-kinktober fic <3

"what are you doing here?" you hissed, standing in the frame of your front door, eyes narrowing at the blonde boy before you. rafe cameron stood out like a sore thumb in the neighborhood you lived in. the king of the kooks had to admit he didn't like slumming it out here on the cut during the day either, but here he was, knocking at your door with urgency. he was having a shit day and all he wanted was you. he needed you.

in the recent past, you'd been no stranger to sneaking him in and out of your house, falling into temptation once or twice or three or four times. but you told yourself you were done, if your friends caught wind of something going on between the two of you, you would never be able to come back from it. and you told rafe you were done, too, but he apparently didn't care. "come on, don't be like that. let me in." you couldn't tell if he was demanding it or begging you, but as you tried to shut the door in his face, he stuck his crisp white sneaker in the doorway to stop you. you were alone, and you did have fun with him, but that wasn't the point. your eyes darted around your front yard, hoping not to see anyone you knew hanging around. with a sigh, you decided to swing the door back in, inviting him in.

the sound of the door shutting behind you shot a feeling of excitement through you, knowing what was to come now that the two of you were alone. you knew rafe didn't come around here to play jenga with you. you turned to see him planted down on your couch, pulling a plastic baggie from his pants pocket and quickly fumbling with it to get at it's insides. everything inside of you was screaming that this was wrong, that you had to tell him to leave. when you promised yourself to stop sleeping with the prince of figure eight, you also promised yourself you'd stop snorting whatever he brought along with him. all you needed was to prove to all those kooks that you were just some drug addict from the cut. you may have liked smoking a joint every now and again with jj but that had to be it. "what're you staring at? you want some or not?" he didn't even seem to talk to you with respect, you couldn't believe he had the nerve to come down here and knock at your door, and it was even worse that you let him in.

but, all of your high-horse bullshit aside, you were quick to fall back onto the couch by his side as he broke up the few grams of coke on one of your dad's old motorcycle magazines sitting on the coffee table with his american express card. you pulled your hair up into a messy ponytail, and rafe couldn't help the cocky smirk that sprawled across his face as he noticed. "'atta girl," he handed you the fifty dollar bill he'd had tightly rolled up into a straw, that you certainly intended to slip into your pocket before he left. the two of you went line for line until there was nothing but a fine residue left. you hated how good it made you feel, and how much it made you want him. but damn, you loved it too, or else you wouldn't be here. you sunk back onto the old couch cushions for a moment, turning to see rafe looking back at you. no one would ever understand what drew the two of you to one another, not even you did, but it didn't ever really matter in moments like this. maybe it was the drugs, maybe it was because you were sexually frustrated and didn't click with the other guys you tried to hook up with.

the feeling of rafe's hand on your thigh pulled you from your sea of thoughts and sent a shiver up your back. now all you could look at were his lips, and not another second passed before he was pressing them against yours. you climbed into his lap, straddling him as the two of you got lost in each other's mouths. his hands explored your body, so warm and making you melt the more they traveled. just this feeling of making out with you made something inside of him roar, and he was finally starting to not regret coming down here and knocking at your door. with each kiss, your hips grinded at his, and you could feel him growing harder and harder in between your legs as you did. your kisses got sloppier and rafe got more impatient, parting from your lips to pull your shirt up over your head. seeing as you were home alone, getting ready to lay in bed with some netflix, you were braless, and the sight incited a primal groan from him. "fuckk," it was almost a whine, and you had to admit you liked that you could get that reaction from him so easily. at this point, he was throbbing in his jeans, and he couldn't wait any longer.

in a few swift motions, your shorts and panties were off and you sat there naked as rafe rushed to get his belt and pants off, letting his cock spring from his briefs. you practically drooled at the sight, and neither of you could wait another second. reaching for your ponytail, his hand wrapped around the base of your hair and pulled you down to his favorite sight. "come 'ere baby, suck my dick like i know you like." he was so cocky and you couldn't stand how much it turned you on. like clockwork, you began bobbing up and down at his shaft, his hand still wrapped up in your hair to keep you focused. your hand followed in rhythm as you stroked him, saliva just flowing from you and making an absolute mess that you knew would leave a stain when you were done. going down on guys wasn't something you could always say you enjoyed, but for whatever reason, you liked doing it for rafe. maybe it was the way he encouraged you, but it was how you liked to start every hook up with him by now. "fuck, yes, just like that," rafe growled through gritted teeth, his fingers tightening in your hair as you took him deeper. his cock twitched in your mouth, already leaking pre-cum from the familiar pleasure of your mouth. he loved watching you work, your cheeks hollowing with each bob of your head, your hand pumping him in time. it was a filthy, beautiful sight. his free hand reached down to roughly palm your breast, pinching and tugging at your nipple. "fuckin' love these tits," he snarled, giving the sensitive bud a hard twist. "gonna mark 'em up later, make sure everyone knows who you belong to." the possessive words sent a jolt straight to your core, mixing with the taste of him on your tongue. you could feel yourself getting more and more pathetic under his touch, and you could feel your panties starting to soak from the excitement of having rafe's dick in your mouth. you hated the hold he had on you, but it always felt too good to not keep this little affair going. a muffled moan escaped your lips at his words, sending vibrations down his shaft that he almost immediately responded to.

"mhm, that's it, you dirty slut," the blonde kook grunted, his hips bucking slightly as he fought the urge to thrust deep into your throat. he wanted to see how far he could push you, how depraved he could make you before you begged for mercy. he yanked your head back, pulling you off his cock with a wet pop. "get on your knees, now," he commanded, his voice low and rough with lust. "i'm gonna fill that pretty mouth of yours till you're choking on my cum." without waiting for a response, he grabbed your shoulders and forced you down, positioning himself in front of your face once more. "open wide, princess," he sneered, his eyes darkening with desire as he aimed his thick erection at your parted lips. "take it all like a good little cocksucker." you felt a shiver run down your spine as he manhandled you, forcing you onto your knees. despite your initial reluctance, your body seemed to have a mind of its own, craving the dominance he exuded. you opened your mouth obediently, letting out a soft whimper as he pressed the tip of his cock against your tongue. "oh my god," you managed to mumble around his girth, feeling him start to push into your mouth again. you knew you were playing with fire, submitting so willingly to this toxic asshole, but the thrill of it all was intoxicating. as he began to fuck your face, you relaxed your throat, taking him deeper with each powerful thrust. saliva dripped down your chin as you struggled to breathe around his invading length, but you didn't dare pull away, not even when tears began swelling in your eyes.

rafe groaned loudly as he bottomed out in your throat, "fuck baby," he panted, his grip on your hair tightening painfully as he started to piston in and out of your mouth with reckless abandon. your tears only spurred him on, the salty taste mingling with the slickness of your saliva coating his throbbing cock. he reveled in the knowledge that he was breaking you, reducing you to nothing more than a fuck-toy. "look at me while i ruin your throat, babygirl," he demanded, his icy blue eyes blazing with sadistic triumph as he held your gaze. "show me how desperate you are for me." as if in a trance, you met his gaze, your own eyes watering and glassy with pain and submission. your hands instinctively came up to grasp his thighs, urging him deeper, needing more of him even as your body screamed for respite. you couldn't help the whimpers that escaped you as he continued to fuck your face mercilessly, each thrust hitting the back of your throat and making you gag around him, only driving him closer to his release. you could practically hear the sound of your bones rattling as he pulled your hair harshly, the pain only serving to heighten your arousal. rafe's pace never faltered, his hips snapping forward with raw power as he claimed your mouth. with a particularly fierce plunge, he hit the back of your throat, triggering your gag reflex as he rode you hard. you struggled to breathe, your eyes watering, but the thrill of being used so thoroughly sent waves of pleasure coursing through you. as he neared climax, he pulled out, aiming his cock at your chest and painting the peaks of your breasts with ribbons of hot, sticky semen. "lick it clean, baby." he ordered, his tone laced with satisfaction as he watched you eagerly comply.

once he caught his breath again, rafe tucked himself away and stood, offering you a hand up. "i knew you'd make me feel better," he praised, his expression softening for a moment before he gathered his things— his phone, wallet, drugs and everything else that somehow got scrambled around your little living room in the short amount of time he'd been there. "wh- you're leaving? that was it?" you took a moment to catch your breath, your chest heaving as you looked down at the mess he'd made of you. a part of you wanted to be angry, to lash out at him for treating you like nothing more than a disposable toy. but another part of you blamed yourself. what did you expect? you snatched your shirt off the couch and pulled it over yourself again, suddenly not so keen on letting him see you naked. "uh, yeah, got other plans." he scoffed, not hesitating to reach for the knob of your front door. you felt your bottom lip start to quiver, and you quickly bit it to stop yourself from giving him the satisfaction of watching you cry over him. your eyes fell from his, seeing the television remote there in front of you on the table, not thinking as you grabbed it and chucked it across the room at him, just barely missing his face. "fuck you, cameron!" you shouted, and rafe's face contorted into an equally as angry expression. "yeah, yeah, fuck you too." he swung the door open, calling back to you from your front lawn. you watched as he didn't waste any time getting into his car, pulling off of your property just as quickly as he'd pulled in.

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron fic #rafe x reader #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe obx #obx fanfiction #obx fic #obx #outer banks fanfiction #outer banks #outer banks smut #outer banks fic #outer banks imagine #pumpkin writes ୨୧

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allaboutnayeli · 5 months ago

Text

not over, never over | a.putellas x reader

summary: you and alexia broke up but that doesn't mean everything is over.

author notes: sorry to the blonde british woman fans �� alexia won so i had to pull this out. i actually been wanting to write smt for alexia for so long! hope you guys enjoy this 😋

contains: ex!alexia x reader, no toxicity just pure misunderstanding and love in these parts, angst but it's worth it, from lovers to exes to lovers trope, lesbians lesbian-ing, badly translated spanish sorry spanish speaking community 🗣️, inspiration is lyssa & dijonai look at wnba lesbian drama influencing people outside of the league, slow build up.. just vibe

playing let em' know by bryson tiller 🎵

"if that's how you really feel then i'm done!" is the last thing you said to alexia before leaving her apartment. not only her apartment, but the three year long relationship that has been a stable figure in your life since it started. you aren't even sure how the argument that led up to the break-up even started; alexia and you ended up in her apartment after a intense training session. she was irritated, you were irritated. all it took was one wrong move where you complained that there was a lack of warm water after alexia's shower and you two were suddenly spilling out all of the problems going on in-between you two.

how sometimes the spaniard doesn't communicate in the healthiest way, opting to hold everything in until her emotions explode. how you overthink about every little action she does which leads to you misreading the situation and being distant towards her. it was both of yours faults but at the same time no body's fault. everything just happened at the wrong time, on the wrong day, in the wrong moment and the end result is a break-up that neither of you wanted but both of you refuse to take back.

the first few days without alexia feels like pure hell. going into practice and seeing her face everyday is not helping your emotional state. you want to be angry with her but at the same time you feel so apologetic that you can't bring yourself to entirely blame her for the break-up. she may have started the argument, but you continued it and was the one to end it in such a castophic way so you were also apart of the problem.

the other barcelona girls don't notice right away what happened. alexia and you would act friendly with eachother, a little avoidant but friendly. at the end of the day, when you two are on the pitch, feelings need to be pushed aside and football needs to take priority. she's still professional and you are too but there is a sense of distance that even others soon notice.

mapi is the first to say something about it. alexia is over mapi and ingrid's shared apartment, laying on her couch while watching some old euros matches. rewatching the euros from last year before the tournament for this year happens is a tradition mapi and alexia pride themselves on. however, there is a bit of sadness hanging over the usually fun hangout.

"is spain losing again or what? you have hardly smiled since you got here," the tattooed woman says, coming out of the kitchen with a bowl of popcorn. she makes alexia adjust so that she can also sit down on the couch. the way alexia takes a short moment to reply is already worrying mapi.

"what? no, i.." alexia shakes her head before glancing at her friend. she doesn't know what excuse to use; should she just say she doesn't feel well or say it's a family issue? neither would do, mapi can read alexia like the back of her hand. the only person mapi knows better is ingrid which is expected.

before alexia can say anything else, mapi places her free hand on the older woman's shoulder. a knowing smile on her lips as she looks at alexia. there is of course the constant warmth that mapi brings around with her everywhere, in everything. that warmth makes alexia perk up a little. mapi is her bestfriend; venting to her wouldn't be so bad. it wouldn't be bad at all. mapi is not the type to judge, anyone can see that based off her tattoos alone.

"is it about y/n? the last time i saw you two leave practice together was nearly a week ago and that's a long time for you two," mapi says gently, knowing how alexia sometimes needs coaxing to speak her mind.

it's something about hearing your name and mapi's tone and just being near her bestfriend that makes alexia blurt out, "she broke up with me!"

immediately she quietens down, hopefully none of mapi's neighbors cared about or heard that little outburst.

"i mean.. we had an argument then she left my apartment. she said she's done," the blonde sighs. letting out a small laugh at how mapi shifts to pull her into a hug. she accepts it easily, there's no point of rejecting it when mapi already knows what's wrong.

"it's okay, alexia. well.. it's not okay but you know what i mean," mapi says, "sabes que ella te ama."

"por supuesto que lo sé," alexia pulls away from the embrace. she lets out a tired sigh, leaning back into the couch to match the exhaustion in her mind. she could play practice for hours on end without feeling tired but days without you leaves her feeling aimless. three straight years of having you for herself and now you're gone, in that way at least.

"but still she said she's done. i feel horrible for how quick i was to lash out at her.." alexia continues to tell mapi about what happened. how the littlest thing set her off and she just couldn't stop. the argument wasn't even about the shower, alexia had been pent up with emotions for a long while that day. they all just spilled out the moment a tiny conflict happened. the remorse in the blonde is obvious just by her words, but it's not just her tone or what she says. alexia's whole body looks defeated like when she loses a big game.

it's a sorry sight truly. mapi gives her opinion once alexia is finished. saying, "just sounds like you need to communicate better. i think you can work it out with her. muéstrale que lo que pasó fue un error. uno del que te arrepientes."

alexia glances at mapi before looking at the tv screen across from them. the match is nearly over, with spain still losing. she can't even focus on how her nation's men team is being absolute shit when everytime she closes her eyelids, she sees your face. she sees the hurt expression you had when she snapped at you. the way she could see how you tensed up and immediately got defensive but there was this split second where you just looked so hurt. nobody would have caught that slight expression change before you yelled back, but she did, of course she did. she has spent so much time studying your face and your habits and just you that she could describe you so easily, like there is some textbook out there with your name on it. in a way there is; it's sitting all pretty inside of alexia's head.

if only she wasn't such an asshole, maybe all those things she knew about you wouldn't go to waste.

mapi doesn't try to make alexia speak again. instead she just chews on her popcorn and watches the match on screen. alexia would open back up soon enough, when she felt like it.

everyone else figured out what happened when weeks passed and you two weren't acting like y'all usually do. no obviously affectionate teasing or kisses you two think everyone else doesn't see. mapi of course haven't told anyone except for ingrid who isn't the type to gossip, but coming to the conclusion that you two were broken up was easy to get just from your actions.

walking into the locker room knowing everyone knew was driving your anxiety up a wall. would someone say something about it? or would they just ignore it? there isn't some tension between alexia and you.. at least you don't believe it to be. even though you can hardly look at her for more than five minutes before looking away. she wasn't doing any better. yeah, no tension.

you decide to just act like you were unbothered by the break-up. going into the locker room like any other day and just doing what you usually do; and nothing happens. everyone talks to you like normal. you thought someone would point out what happened but then you realized your teammates, your friends are better than that. all the questioning would probably happen later outside of practice.

everybody could see how affected alexia was even though she tried to hide it. she isn't as good at acting nonchalant as she thinks she is. in reality, the other barcelona girls could tell something was wrong with how distant she's being. keeping to herself more, being one of the first to head for the locker room once practice ended and one of the last to arrive. of course nothing affected her performance on the pitch. like always alexia was a force to be reckoned with.

meanwhile anyone who didn't know you. didn't know how deep the relationship between alexia and you ran would think you didn't care about what happened; the furthest thing from the truth. you just carry the hurt around, keeping it to yourself.

"hola hermosa. ¿cómo estás?" you hear from behind you when going to your car after practice. you turn to see salma. the tall girl smiles at you, quick to come closer and sling her arm over your shoulder. pulling you close as she says, "don't answer that. i already know how you're feeling. how are you handling the breakup is a better question."

one moment you were confused on who was talking to you and the next you are in salma's arms. you blame her long legs for how quick everything happened or maybe it's due to how spaced out you were being.

"how do you know i'm dealing with a break-up is the actual question," you say even though you already knew everyone else figured out what happened.

"c'mon, everyone can tell. we just didn't want to make things awkward at practice but aitana sent me to come check up on you," she smiles at you, "it isn't hard to figure out if anyone looks at you and alexia for more than two minutes. i can see it in your eyes."

was it that obvious? of course it was. you have always been thankful for how good your teammates were at figuring things out but right now you really wished you didn't so you could just deal with this on your own.

"alright, whatever. i'm not handling it well at all. i didn't think i would be single right now.." you let out a long sigh and another sigh when you saw the look of sympathy salma was giving you.

"awe, y/n," salma pulls you into a hug. you happily accept it, you have been needing a hug for a while now since you weren't getting any hugs from alexia anymore. it's a little embarrassing to hug in the middle of the parking lot, but whatever.

"can i come over? you can vent all you want. maybe get tipsy, nobody has to know," she says when she pulls away from the hug after a long moment.

you go silent as you think then you nod, "okay."

and that's how you end up on your couch, way more than a little tipsy (you only had two glasses of wine), crying to salma.

"i just don't get it. why wouldn't she stop me from leaving? why wouldn't she reach out afterwards? i didn't mean what i said!" your words are irrational and you know that but the alcohol in your system is just fueling your thoughts. salma is holding you in her arms. she's unsure if she should just outright tell you that it's obvious alexia wants you back or would it be better to just tell you to reach out instead. she goes with the latter; giving you the truth right now about how alexia is low-key miserable without you doesn't seem like the best option. maybe when you aren't tipsy off some wine.

"why don't you reach out? why didn't you? the break-up sounds so out of the blue, i wouldn't believe it if it wasn't for the fact you and alexia are being all weird around each other," salma says.

"we aren't being weird around eachother."

"alexia scored in our last match and you didn't go to hug her like everyone else. you just gave her a high five before we got back to playing. if this was a few weeks ago, you would have been the first to hug her."

salma's accurate reasoning makes you want to roll your eyes and deny, but it's true. alexia and you are at a weird point. haven't not talked once outside of something football related. no texting either, just pure distance. that night when you left you have hoped she would call or text or even talk to you the next day at practice, but that didn't happen. just silence and distance and a "friendly" demeanor that definitely had something underneath. just because you two didn't talk didn't mean there wasn't still chemistry there.

you shrug, looking up at the taller girl, "i might. just nervous, what if she officially wants to be done and never to look back? i just walked out on her." the anxiety in your mind was building back up; the alcohol was not helping.

"she might be, actually, i know she's hurt but that doesn't mean she wouldn't hear you out. it's you we're talking about here," salma looks down at you. seeing the obvious sadness and regret in your eyes makes her frown. it wasn't like you to be so down, your personality wasn't like that.

the emphasis on know makes you feel a little more confident. if salma is so sure and she's looking from the outside in, no emotions clouding her judgement, then it must be true right? the least you could do was try.

"alright, i'll talk to her. i swear." salma smiles at your words, quick to grab your glass and put a small amount of wine in it.

then she smirks at you, "one last drink? it's celebratory."

the last match of the season was an obvious success, an easy win against valencia. all of the barcelona players decided to go out clubbing to celebrate the end of the season despite the fact you all would be heading to mexico soon enough; that doesn't mean y'all couldn't get a little drunk though.

it has been a solid few days since you had that venting session with salma and still you haven't done what you said. it wasn't your fault really, with the season almost coming to a close, you didn't want to have that conversation and possibly make the locker room a weird environment if alexia didn't take you back. salma (and aitana who salma had reported everything you said back to) were against your thinking. firmly pushing for you to just talk to her and figure everything out.

"the environment in the locker room is already weird because we are used to seeing you guys together," is what aitana said when you told her your reasoning, "ella te quiere de vuelta, todos lo pueden decir."

hearing that from aitana had put more confidence in you than before. it couldn't be a lie if salma and aitana believed it, right?

back to the clubbing, you are getting ready at your apartment. everyone has gone back to their own homes after celebrating in the locker room, so they could freshen up and change. you spend way more time on finding an outfit than you usually do; tonight was the night you planned to talk to alexia. having this long needed conversation when you both were sober and not high off of a good season would be best but everyone needs some liquid courage sometimes to pull through, to get what they want.

it's slowly been getting too long since you two last spoke outside of football, the last time you two interacted on social media, and fans were slowly noticing it.

it wasn't a hard task to spot the tension and lack of celebrating on the pitch in-between you two. you vividly remember going on twitter to so many fanpages wondering what's going on between alexia and you. scrolling past each one made you just want to throw away your rational thinking and text alexia right away, but no. you waited until the season ended so here you are putting on a pink halter top and a short skirt that you knew alexia loved, she bought it after all. when it came to jewelry you put on the necklace she left over at your place.

you haven't gone over to her place to get your things and she hasn't either. you noticed that she kept wearing the gold promise ring you bought her, seeing that made your heart flutter every time. you weren't any different, you still wore your promise ring as well and you have been sleeping in the shirts she left over your place every single night without fail.

you take a short while to finish your makeup, just in time as you hear a car honk outside. already knowing it was aitana, you were planning to get drunk tonight or just a little tipsy so driving your car to the club wasn't an option. you grab your purse, making sure you had your phone, before leaving out of your apartment. smiling as aitana waves at you from her car. she giggles when you get in the passenger seat, smile on your lips.

"ready to get your girl back?" she glances at you.

you gasp before laughing, "we're going to the club to celebrate how amazing we were all season. not for some get her back plot."

"it's okay to tell the truth," aitana gives you a teasing smile before focusing her attention on getting out of your apartment complex parking lot and on the street.

"you have been around mapi way too much."

the club is bustling with people as aitana and you step inside. she pulls you towards where the tables all the other barcelona players are at. immediately your eyes land on alexia, she's sitting at a table with mapi, ingrid, marta, and caro. two couples at the table and it would be three if you were over there, if you two were still together.

she's wearing a red tube top and denim shorts that show off her legs. she looks beautiful like always and you can't, don't, stop your thoughts from wandering.

"we're finally here! y/n was taking forever," aitana smiles as you two stop at the table with ona, lucy, and keira. you spot salma sitting with patri and claudia, all of them already having drinks.

"of course she was. we shouldn't expect less from her," lucy laughs as you scoff. sitting down next to aitana, you lean your body slightly on the table. "i bet ona takes longer," you say.

"what did i do?" everyone at the table laughs at ona offended expression. conversation flows freely between you all. nobody has gotten rowdy just yet, with the team still waiting on frido, jana, and a few others to come to the club. your mind strays away from the fact alexia is at the table next to you as you engage in a heated debate with lucy about who is going to win the euros this year.

"don't act like england is a bad team!" lucy says, looking at keira for back-up. the younger woman rolls her eyes, turning to continue to talk to aitana.

"i never said that but they just aren't beating spain this year," you say back. ona immediately jumps in to defend your point, "she's right. i bet spain is going to crush it this year."

"babe, you're supposed to be on my side."

"i am on your side, just not your country's side."

ona and lucy's little back and forth is cut short as everybody else arrives. now it's really time to let loose and party. aitana immediately sends you to the bar to get everyone at the table drinks, you pass by patri and claudia who got up to dance the moment everyone was here. you know a few of your other teammates are dancing right now; frido didn't even sit down before going to the dance floor.

when you left for the bar, you didn't notice the mischievous smile on aitana's lips or how she looked over at mapi who had a mischievous look in her eye. you also didn't notice how alexia wasn't at her table anymore either.

you reach the bar, leaning against it as you wait for the bartender to come over since he's busy with someone else right now. when you look to your right, you have to do a double take because it's a pretty blonde with a red tube top and denim shorts on right next to you; alexia.

she's acting like she doesn't notice that you are right next to her but she could spot you from a mile away. should she say something? her internal monologue was basically full of just "duh of course" and "what if she doesn't even want to talk to you"

both are annoying the shit out of her, so when the bottle of tequila comes she opens it. pouring herself a shot and downs it right away.

"you're eager, huh?" you want to slap your hand over your lips. you weren't planning to speak to her just yet, later on when you had some type of alcohol in your system was the plan.

alexia glances at you. a mix of uncertainty and fondness in her eyes.

she chuckles, "yeah. why don't you get some drinks so you can join me? you did so well during the season.. you deserve it."

the praise makes you feel all warm. way too warm in a club packed with people. you feel hesitant, nervous, unsure of how this would continue. would you two actually talk about what happened or just act like it didn't happen the entire night?

"you did well too," you say before turning to call for the bartender. after you order the drinks, you look over to the spot next to you where alexia was and find that she's gone. you give a quick glance behind you at the tables where the team was at. she's sitting down next to aitana now, half of her table was gone as mapi and ingrid are up somewhere.

"thanks," you say to the bartender. grabbing the drinks before walking back over to your table. alexia smiles at you when you sit down. you smile back.

ona and lucy take their drinks, ona pulling lucy up to go to dance and keira gestures to aitana to get up.

"gracias por las bebidas. ya volvemos, yendo al baño," aitana says, getting up. you give her a weird look; one of pleading for her to stay and not leave you alone with alexia. the blonde gives aitana a weird look of her own.

aitana and keira leave, ignoring you both. you can easily see they aren't even going to the bathroom, but neither alexia and you object.

the table falls into an awkward silence. alexia sips on her drink, this time it isn't a shot but an actual glass. you let your eyes wander before landing on your drink; alexia knows you're trying to avoid her gaze and it's really starting to annoy her. mapi had drilled into her head (it took so many times because alexia is too stubborn for her own good) that you want her back, that y'all are meant to be. the alcohol in her system is really messing with her right now and all she wants to do is to be against you, feeling your warmth.

and you weren't faring much better mentally. you came here to celebrate but to also get alexia back or at least talk about what happened but you can't even muster up the courage to mention it. you have hardly spoken to her.

she's looking at you though, you can feel it.

"i'm going to dance. you should too, bonita," she says before standing up. you don't answer her but you watch her walk away; she can feel your eyes on her.

if this was just a week ago, alexia would be way too nervous to call you that but the alcohol is fueling her confidence and your eyes on her settle any nerves that she had left. however the spanish player was going to let you approach her, so whatever is about to happen can go at your pace; she respects you like that. also she doesn't want to scare you off or piss you off. she just hopes you don't take long because one more drink and she might just take things into her own hands.

you sit at the table, sipping on your drink but you can only watch everybody dance for so long until you get up yourself. remembering how alexia called you bonita makes you finish off your drink, determined to at least try to get her back tonight.

when you go onto the dancefloor you don't go straight for her but decide to dance with salma. somehow she hasn't tired herself out and she happily pulls you close.

"pensé que ibas a estar ocupado hablando con tu novia. ¿cuál es el problema?" she shouts close to your ear, trying to make you hear her over the music. you shake your head, "i'm going to.. i just need more time!"

"bueno, parece que la reina se está impacientando," the tall girl laughs, "she's looking over here at you."

a look of confusion crosses your face before you turn slightly to look behind you and spot her right away. she's dancing with frido but her eyes are focused on you; the spaniard's gaze is intense, calling out to you.

"i'm going to talk to her," you turn to look at salma, "and don't get too drunk, okay? drink some water!" then you move away from her. you barely catch the "okay!" shouted towards you (which you know is a lie) as you make your way off of the dancefloor and towards the bathroom. you need to prepare yourself before approaching alexia.

you step into the bathroom, thankful that it's empty. straight away you go to the sink to look at yourself. what should you say? should you just apologize? you aren't able to go too deep into your pondering as you hear the bathroom door open then close.

"you just keep walking out on me, huh?" the voice of alexia makes you look at the door. there she is, arms crossed across her chest as she looks at you. same intense look from earlier.

"i wouldn't call this instance walking out. i was going to come and talk to you," you say. this isn't how you imagined having a conversation with her, but it's happening so you'll just have to deal with it.

"bueno lo haré. me viste... mirándote y ni siquiera te acercaste a mí," the spaniard walks closer to you and you don't step away, "everyone is telling me that you want me back. are they lying?"

you shake your head, some confidence and a lot of determination flows into your conscience, "people keep telling me that you want me back. are they lying?"

alexia chuckles, "no, of course not. i'm just frustrated. we both came to this club knowing that we want each other but it feels like you are playing games with me."

"games? i'm not. i didn't want to just come over to you and be like be my girlfriend again. i wasn't sure how you felt exactly, just that you wanted me back. i didn't want to rush it," you are quick to say. the words would sound rational to a less drunk version of alexia but all she could think about is that she wished you two talked about this way earlier.

"that's sweet, but i can't wait any longer. i only want one thing."

"what?"

"to be yours."

author notes: this didn't come out like how i expected it to but i don't hate it. hopefully y'all liked it and i wrote alexia okay enough. also this fic is so long, so like cliffhanger or part two?

#alexia putellas x reader #fc barcelona x reader #woso x reader #woso angst #woso fanfics

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