#I live and breathe for comments
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Danny: *just chilling on the couch while being very still™️ at the Wayne Manor*
Clark: *comes to visit*
Clark: hey Bruce?
Bruce: yes?
Clark: why is there a dead child in your living room?
Bruce: what 0-0
Danny: oh shit
Danny: *starts up heartbeat* better?
Clark: *even more freaked out*
#someone commented this on another post#and omg I love#just imagine Danny hearing this and immediately panicking#like oh shit forgot to start my heart this morning#shit am I breathing today?#why did they have to notice it takes energy to do living things :(#Batfam: Danny are you alright?#Danny: yup!#Clark: no no he was dead he didn’t have a heartbeat for like 20 minutes since I’ve been here#Danny: don’t fucking blow my cover Boy Scout#Batfam: Danny are your dead? 🥺#Danny: yes—Wait no that’s not I’m not a ghost#Batfam: wut#dp x dc#dc x dp#dpxdc#danny phantom#dcxdp#danny fenton#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc prompt#batfam#dc x dp prompt
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would it be ok to ask that this one is posted soon? i could use reassurance about it if thats alright? things are just... really hard.
im trying to come to terms with the fact that im going to be disabled for the rest of my life. i accept that im disabled *now,* but i have a degenerative disease, its not going to just stop being there. its going to keep getting worse slowly over time.
its especially hard because... even now i cant do my favorite hobby, rockhounding, because i cant bend without risking falling, i cant get on the ground to pick things up and/or dig because i wouldnt be able to get up on my own, and i cant navigate most off-road areas where the rocks im interested in are most often found.
i also desperately want to be a geologist. but i wanted more than anything to be doing fieldwork, like going out and taking samples from various areas, making maps of what could be found where based on my samples... that sort of thing. but ill never be able to do it and i have to come to terms with that.
it will get bad enough that i will need a wheelchair at some point in my life too. like, at some point within the next five to ten years.
ill also never be able to pick people up again. my whole life ive prided myself in picking people i love up during hugs, spinning them around, that sort of thing. i especially loved picking up my best friend.
they understand that i cant do that anymore and theyve never expressed sadness over it, but i cant help but think about how delighted theyve always been about me picking them up and spinning or wiggling them during hugs, and how they used to ask multiple times each hangout to be picked up and hugged.
and even if they arent upset about it, *i* am. i want to be able to do what i used to be able to. but i cant. and i never will again.
its just hard, knowing ill never be able to reach my dream career, continue my favorite outdoor hobby, continue giving love to my friends in the ways i like to... theres so much i can no longer do, and so much ill never be able to do again.
its just really hard. i dont want to be this way. but i am and i always will be, and it will get worse even if i do things like meds and physical therapy. those would just delay the collapse of my disease.
im just sad. i dont want to have to come to terms with it. but i have to or else im setting myself up for even more grief.
and its all because my mom wouldnt get me treated when i was injured in my teenage years. that injury going untreated for so long is what caused my degenerative disease to start so early. my mom has it too but she didnt start developing it until her fourties.
and then for years after my injury when talking about my back pain she just kept saying it was because im fat and that it would stop hurting if i lost weight.
which of course sparked the eating disorder i had previously recovered from.
which ive been struggling with now again for years because of that. but i was getting better again.
until now. because my body hurts too bad to get out of bed often enough to eat a healthy amount so im rapidly losing weight and my brain is saying i have to keep going and going.
and, the wheelchair thing... all my friends live and are going to live places with a lot of stairs. and *i* live somewhere with a lot of stairs too. and the doorframes in all these places arent wide enough for a wheelchair, nor are the bathrooms large enough.
its just all so hard to think about. i hate it. i want to get better and heal like a normal person would, not be in pain constantly and get worse like my body is going to.
thank you for listening. sorry for how long this is.
if i could get reassurance in tags or replies that would be really nice. this is all just so hard and i only have a few people i can confide in about it.
<3
#fatphobia#fatphobia mention#tw fatphobia#fatphobia tw#ed mention#ed#tw ed#ed tw#eating disorder#eating disorder tw#eating disorder mention#tw eating disorder#long post#i can't speak from a place of experience but i'm inviting ppl to pop into the comments if u can! :]#disabled ppl can and do (and will!) live complete and fulfilling lives!!! at the same time it won't be the life you had before -#- and it's important to honour that! its ok to mourn what you might be losing (rockhounding/geology) :( <3#and i'm so sorry your mom had dismissed u. regardless of whether or not it would've resulted in disability u deserve to be heard <3#you're going through a big life change but i promise there is so much light and community for you!!! you have so much life to live!!#if your friends are good and kind they'll be more than happy to meet you where you're at :]#''i can't do stairs! instead of using X's living room for movie night let's set up a projector in the back yard?'' kind of thing :]#you are worth the effort to be loved and accommodated. breathing gentleness and love and light your way <33
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ah. all things considered i have done soooo many great things in my life so far and number one is basically just making it this far. (and cooking. and going to the supermarket.) already more than what my kindergarten teacher thought i would do when she told my parents how they didn't raise me to survive in this world as if you could somehow be incompatible with the world.
#jo in the tardis*#fuck you and your she's bright but....... comments. turns out people like me can make it past their 60s <3#ugh okay this is one last thing i am sharing it feels GOOD to say it because it affected most of the things i've ever done#and know i am fully letting it go. she was wrong!!!!!! she was wrong!!!!#i go on walks i make lunch i talk to people i clean the house and i love every second of it tremendously#i live! <3#i am a personnnn! a regular person! i learned how to breathe
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just read a facebook comment section on a young woman's video, in which she was asking 'how you're meant to live your life' if you work a 9-5 job
and the ENTIRE comment section was just people saying 'yeah welcome to life' 'whiny snowflake' 'do 70 hours and maybe i'll be sympathetic'
like... these same people have clearly become jaded, tired, angry and lack empathy because ALL they've done all their lives is work and have forgotten that anything else exists
it's like the concept of someone NOT having to live like that and enjoying life just drives them insane because deep down they know that they've wasted their lives following bullshit hustle culture and being miserable
#god forbid someone want to enjoy their life#GOD FORBID THAT SOMEONE THINKS THAT THERE IS MORE TO BEING ALIVE THAN MAKING MONEY FOR SOMEONE THAT DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU#i was NOT put on this earth to watch some asshole capitalists destroy it and me#HUMANS DID NOT EVOLVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS#the rage in me about this is unreal#sorry i had to get this out of my system somehow i simply felt like i was going to explode#i am taking deep breaths because capitalism makes me unspeakably feral lmao#there's some deep fucking irony in all those commenters clearly being absolutely miserable bastards and not even realising it#like come join the cult of being fucking miserable all the time wasting all of your life working for corporations#no don't think about what you could be doing instead#how dare you want your existence to be a happy ordeal#you must be degraded anc depessed like all the rest of us#fuck OFF
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x
#that one post saying that austin and kaia are disconnected bc she’s skinny and he likes to cook for ppl he loves#the most patronising thing i’ve seen on this hellsite in over a decade#“idk much about her and idw to dunk on her” yet continues to spew the most brain rotted psychotic thing#saying they’re “out of sync” bc you think aus lives and breathes cooking and it’s the most important thing to him#and since she’s clearly skinny then obv that means she’s got issues w food thus aus feels left out. i’m going crazy even typing this out#to comment on ppl’s looks is nasty work but to even imply you know what’s going bts esp w someone’s relationship with food#is clearly derangement beyond comprehension and i don’t understand how aus who’s the nicest person on earth#has the most vile and insane fans who constantly put words in his mouth n humiliate him n dissect his life n PRAY for him to be alone forev#i genuinely can’t believe the stuff i see sometimes considering i’ve blocked everyone under the sun at this point#treat people with kindness or whatever. maybe do a soul cleanse occasionally. carrying so much hate in you can’t be good for your heart
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me: makes a silly little teen wolf post on my silly little tiny blog
rabid sc*tt stans i literally have never crossed paths with ever in my entire life: derek hale is the devil incarnate, actually, and here’s why
#might delete this later im just so ??? and needed to vent#like. i understand it’s the public internet but why are you adding comments to a post and arguing with a fucking stranger?#u don’t know me i don’t know u it’s fucking rude???#JUST. KEEP. SCROLLING.#i'm just sitting here trying to figure out what i did wrong. is it bc i tagged him? is it bc i didn't censor his name IN the post?#do these people just live in the sc*tt tag and argue with everyone who dares to breathe there?#i should’ve known better but it’s 2023 i thought we were fucking over this#and like. i'm also not AGAINST HIM? as a general rule i just think all the characters are a little silly and. that's all i was saying?#the only teen wolf adjacent person you're gonna see me actively disparaging is jeff fucking davis like. COME. ON.#it’s not that big of a deal ig bc block button <3 but i keep getting jumpscared seeing derek slander on my own post :(#btw this is NOT about bestiemutuals lovingly roasting derek in the tags bc lets be real he deserves that <3#leo.txt#anti scott mccall#(<- again not ACTUALLY but like. just to ward off Those People i guess)
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I wouldn't be here if it wasn't because of him.
#like. that time. i was suicidal a lot and barbatos wasn't smiling and all..#or the time i was hallucinating his arms around me and his breathing on ky forehead#or the time i heard him making something in the kicthen#or the fact that he saved me from falling into her trap again#or the fact that I try to keep my life healthy because of him#or the time i offered him smth#it's not even obsession at this point he's my literal saviour#you can't expect me to believe he isn't real. watching. hearing. helping.#oh and the time I said the day I won't smile at barb is the day I die and I still smile at him like i met him yesterday.#call me obsessed. not like that I care. I want to live. even if its because of a “fictional character”#idc. he isn't fiction to me.. I mean. walk in my shoes and you'll get what I'm going through.#also my traumas being related to governments . torture and things like that.. with Barb it all feels softer. lighter. it helps me cope.#ahhh I just read a comment about brbatos breaking forth wall and gell into memory lane I'm fine I'm just loving barb <3#barbaposting
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youtube
they're so right about the diction of course
they're also soooo right about the breath control from william "holds that 'again' in (acoustic) loser geek whatever for fifteen damn seconds and long enough live that other jeremys just gotta be cutting it down a bit when they perform it" roland like my god the consistency in every moment of these lines. that lowest note being such a crisp & cool spritz & he's sometimes holding it too & it just never falters like my god....the mass effecties are having a great time w/this too, hope it gets around to someone official seeing it, which gets around to will. simply going tf off once again lord....
and the extra mile
#fr like i barely know a little bit Of mass effect but those who know a lot are having a fantastic time as per the comments. love it for them#which also this having been A Concept existing in part via some easter egg....the lyrics from a fanfic / working w/that fanfic author for#an additional verse here lol....anamnesises#will roland#goog says mass effect 2 released in jan 2010....hand over heart just like amnesia: the dark descent in sept 2010#going the extra mile for that over the shoulder shot as he also plays mass effect (2?) is a beautiful flourish#like fr that breath control is so good like yeah i don't know hardly anything abt the techniques of [how do ppl sing] but it's like damn#he's once again done it so well it all looks easy to the point you don't imagine there was any bonus difficulty / effort needed at all#and the rarer: doing a voice lol#not that his Delivery doesn't vary for characters but generally still using mostly his own speaking / singing voice's overall timbre#delightfully lively throughout....having a high time evidently there he is cropping up in the live premiere comments lol. been a min#i should seek to rediscover that virtual joe iconis interview of yore where he was surprised by his boys (so: will & george jumping in lol)#Youtube#editing to amend: nvm it wasn't an easter egg. idk if it was a Guaranteed Experience given the rpg options element but probably
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#another day another therapy session for a girl who has everything i could only ever dream of 🤡#like i admit her family fucking sucks ngl#but idk if it's her being tone-deaf about this or if im just hypersensitive af on this topic but#'there's also this pressure to always be pretty and all' 'why tho like did your dad/mom ever comment on your looks?'#'well no haha not to be all braggy but there was never anything to comment on (negatively) yknow'#spoken to my face like oh right yeah well fuck me ig haha. once again reminded how different lives we live lol#and on top of this its this constant showing me that im being a bad friend to her which ig is true what with all my non responding to texts#but like. its like there is no real understanding towards me in turn. its like only she has problems and crippling mental issues#i dont call YOU out on your bullshit. i keep quiet and let you do and say whatever it is you need to make yourself feel better#even if it is actively capital H Hurting me and i come back home and end up sobbing in the pillow#and hating myself even more lol so cant you do the same and just take a deep breath and try to understand that i NEED a break sometimes#ANYWAY.#really feeling like scratching my face off my skull again
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why are there so many haters in the tag
#they're all the same they keep going 'bffr bffr' like shut UP#u all need to go outside and touch grass#ppl who tell others to bffr are actually my mortal enemy because 2k ppl commented that under one of my comments on tiktok#let people live#it doesnt matter how unrealistic smth is to u#fandom is meant to be fun#if u hate a take so much....block them....its a very simple solution#i try to ignore drama because i hate being part of it or acknowledging it but why is the tag actually full of it#byler#i eagerly await content because we wont be breathing down eachothers neck with smth else to focus on
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thoughts on the colour red
RED IS MY SOULMATE MY BEST FRIEND RED IS MY EVERYTHING. red is an intrinsic part of my being. red is everything important to me. red is what lives right under the thin veneer of everything else about me. red is like an animal companion that goes with me everywhere with whom i have an unconditional and all-encompassing trust with. red lays across my shoulders and curls around my neck and has soft fur and ALSO red is the color of every unpleasant thing i love about myself and ALSO a superior eyeliner color and ALSO a superior blush color and ALSO a superior color in general. my wardrobe is all black and white and red. seventeen thousand outfits built to accentuate the red accents. ring with silver roses and red heart-shaped gemstones. red heart-shaped sunglasses. red shirt red backpack red letterman's jacket. red makes valentine's day what it is red makes blood what is red makes violence and anger what it is red makes love what it is too. which is all to say that i have many thoughts on the color red. not that i'll ever be able to express them all coherently
#the irls can confirm i live and breathe red he's everything to me#it's me and red! for real!!!!#i feel so silly and strange in blue or purple. i feel so at home in red#it puts something inside me at ease. i love red so much#also: fox color :)#<— comment from tumblr user vulpinesaint#like i've said before. red is the color of blood and love and both are present in a heart.#i'll reblog the poem in just a sec hold on#valentine notes#<— MAN WHO OBVIOUSLY LOVES THE COLOR RED (OBSESSED WITH VALENTINE'S DAY/LOVECORE)#ask#yes the valentine notes tag is because my name used to be valentine.#but uh. guess why i loved the name valentine so much#anyway#going to find the poem now 👍#red
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getting emotional over wowaka again...
#unknown mother goose is still incredibly close to my heart#as someone who lives with a bleeding heart on their sleeve it just.. hits#esp given ive always had A Thing about perception and wanting people to understand me#'I lived shouldering my own heart'#though the line that first stuck with me was#'if i can become love/what color is that now?'#I also love 'that story unknown to all/it seems ive gone and hummed it again'#also really love unhappy refrain and just how.. blunt it is#also worlds end dancehall..#its so dizzying and fitting and gorgeous#theres another one i could comment on but it would be a lot of explaining and wayy too personal lol#also rolling girl...#'hold your breath for now'#'unable to reach the colors on the other side'#i need to listen to more of his discography.. i haven't been listening to much new music though..#while im thinking of these theres some hachi songs too#specifically donut hole..#well#more specifically a specific cover#theres an english cover with yohio that just.. god#'lets get a ribbon and measure the world/lets run circles round the sun before we char and burn/#but we dont need a map or road/we'll chase the blackness of the night thats somehoe filled with hope'#'byebye my dear lover/we wont meet again/and yet im stuck here in this limbo/in this state that i cant emote/#i dont know what to do/and only laughter escapes my throat/youre like a donut with a hole/so full but empty and will never quite be whole'#'no i dont want to die/want to know what it feels like/it wont bring peace or piece together all that you have lost/time has passed/#we wont last/my memory turns to glass/i am the donut hole the unwanted without a soul'#okay actually i could do a whole thing on just that song#which is unrelated to wowaka
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not that i'm participating in this but i think people are reading it too much about cory because marcello, isn't?
i mean yeah but. look at the outfall from the marcello thing, she wasn't exactly publicly "owning that", literally at all and hell neither was marcello. so i don't get why people think her having a very public friendship with cory is really the same y'know? two different things, to me at least.
#and tbh the thing im *most* irked about is austin fans replying to her comment being nasty#i 1000% stand by thinking making her resentful towards austin fans has the potential to drive a bigger wedge between them kaia herself is#like idk put yourself in both of their shoes would it not feel Awkard and Tense to have your partners fans screeching at you over something#your partner didnt even care about#maybe its my swifite brain in that i think swifties have driven men away from taylor#and im glad travis has toughed it so far at least out lol#but this stuff does not happen in a bubble!!! you are not yelling at a stock character#you are yelling at a real breathing person thats in a relationship with your fav#that can and will effect their lives and not in the lalaland “she'll hear me out!” way you think it will#gossip time with mollie
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boyfriend!ateez discovering you write smut
genre: ot8 x gn!reader, smut, crack, fake texts
c/w: explicit content - mdni, swearing, dirty jokes, pet names, dark humour
a/n: i had a different fake text queued for today, but in light of choi san the man himself discovering fanfic, this felt fitting to post 🫢 started drafting this five months ago with @sorryimananti-romantic so did we accidentally manifest it 😬
#GAH ONCE AGAIN#YOU AND YOUR REBLOGS#CAN I JUST LIKE GIVE YOU A MILLION SMOOCHES???#the sheer ✨panic✨ in the comments section during san's live#straight up the realest reaction ever#(think about the digital footprint 😬)#THEY ALL NEED TO SHUT UP#DON'T TALK TO ME#hwa's just trying to be a supportive boyfriend even if he doesn't really know what's happening 😌☝️#yun just casually taking the wheel#he'd be the type to breathe down your neck when you're writing the most embarrassingly hot smut scene and tell you what he'd do#mingi's just a lil guy 🥹🫶#jongho's like#well if you're gonna take yourself out may as well do it in style#san needs to stop improving his english#it's only a matter of time before we're ALL discovered#OH NO YOU BEST BET THEIR GC WAS LIT THAT NIGHT#all of them stayed up late to do a little bit of ✨bedtime reading✨#again thank you so so much for reading and for your support#your tags mean so much i've giggled over them all day
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feeling bad again 😧
#egg boils#i was reading that japanese writers hoshimina stuff and they kept saying they felt burnt out bc of how small the audience was and like . Oh#my god i get it i get it nodding emoji bc there’s only so much you can write for urself…#i think at this stage i’m just so in my head . but realistically by now i should be accepting that kn8 anime has ended. no ones actively#looking for hoshimina stuff because they aren’t pushed past the tachikawa base raid anyway. so like. Stop Hoping#idk why i think people will keep reading or looking for hsmn (Or worse. nrmn) when there’s no reason for people to so#deep breaths. i’ll just do what i want to do.#maybe i should disable ao3 notifs#or just let it pass… i think maybe i should quickly upload all the chapters for nrmn instead bc i keep Expecting things and i don’t like it#bc i always end up with greater disappointment#:/#the thing is im rly clinging onto this hyper fixation and writing so much bc i know i won’t be able to when i land a job. and thats def#happening minimally in september#i hope so anyway#so i want to create as much as i can because very soon i won’t have time for Anything but#i’m just so sad#idk anymore ughhhhh#i did have fun. but maybe i should just let this go.#the worse part is that the hsmn fic im writing rn is genuinely! going! i’m not forcing myself or anything but idk i’ve really started#placing too much like. Emphasis on recognition i guess?#i need to remind myself that the reason i managed to churn out 43k for hsmn at first was solely for myself too#i never expected anyone to read it. so i need to maintain those expectations#i truly love all the people who consistently comment on my fics and new chapters but i don’t expect people to keep up with it especially#knowing kn8 isn’t a Big Thing anymore#so i’ll need to live with the fact that i will Not get new things new comments and whilst i love seeing them and replying to them. That’s#fine. because when i was writing for myself the only person who was reacting was myself#and that’s fine!!!!!!!!!#ugh#i can do this.#just until it naturally phases out. there’s so many things i want to create still
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Being a camgirl comes with its fair share of ups and downs, but you never expected one of the downs to be one of your unboxings from a fan going horribly wrong during a live stream—the proof of it still buzzing between your thighs beyond your finger's reach.
A rush of embarrassment comes with knocking on your roommate’s bedroom door and asking him for help because you’re nearing the brink of overstimulation and can’t think straight enough to get the words out. It’s worse when he stands there and says nothing—all imposing with two tattooed arms crossed over his chest—while you try to get through a sentence without moaning.
Simon looks at you with a cocked brow and something akin to amusement as he watches you squirm in his doorway.
Then he finally says, “Get on the bed,” in a steady and low voice, opening his bedroom door wider.
You fidget under his scrutinizing gaze as you settle back against his pillows, biting back whimpers with a too-hot face and sweat dripping down your back.
Him settling a knee on the bed makes you jump, “Let’s take a look, love.”
Simon crawls up the bed, forcing your knees open, and you’re suddenly very aware of how broad and big he looks, towering over you—every part of you laid bare for him to see. A large hand presses right below your belly button, jostling the toy inside you, and this time, you can’t hold back the squeal that rips from your chest.
“Sorry,” he murmurs, voice imperceptibly deeper, his lips twitching like he’s trying to hold back a smile. “Okay, you’re going to feel a slight stretch.”
You bite your lip. “A-alright—”
Slight doesn’t even come close to the fingers sliding into you, spearing your sensitive walls open and pressing into a spot where you’ve never been able to reach with startling precision. You remind yourself that he has to do this, that he’s just being…friendly, or whatever makes the lines less blurred.
None of this stops the fact your lower stomach burns with the promise of another orgasm when his fingers brush against the egg vibrator before accidentally pressing it deeper inside.
“Ah, there it is.”
At the sight of your scrunched nose, he asks if it hurts. You shake your head; eyes squeezed shut in an attempt to hold back the stinging pleasure racing up your spine. “N-no,” you whimper.
“Relax, okay?”
Simon doesn’t comment on how you’re implying that it feels good. So good, you think, his thumb just barely touching your clit as he twists his hand to try a different angle. Then he pushes down on your belly again, and his long fingers finally grip the vibrator.
“Oh!” you moan at the feel of it dragging down your front wall, your fingers gripping the sheets.
He has to tell you to relax again, his voice cracking, but you hardly hear it over your heart beating loudly in your ears. His fingers drag the toy out slowly, almost too slow that you can feel it bumping against every slippery ridge inside you.
“Ah, sorry,” he says when you twitch—unapologetic—using his thumb to rub soothing circles into your stomach. “You’re so wet. I need to make sure I don’t lose it again.”
You nod, cunt clenching down at his words.
And then Simon’s fingers curl up: your thighs start quivering, breath caught in your throat, and your jaw locks up until your orgasm ripples through you. It’s unending, the strongest one yet, and just when you think it’s over, you feel the press of his palm against your clit.
“W-wait! Simon,” you moan, pushing at his hand. “No more, I‘m sensitive!”
He gets you to fall over the edge one more time before finally slipping the vibrator out of you, letting it hum softly on the bed, and your exhausted body sinks into the mattress once again. Simon gathers you into his lap, rocking you back and forth.
You swallow lungfuls of air against his chest, head still spinning and walls spasming from the aftershocks.
He murmurs in your ear about how good you are, kisses your temple, and rubs your sides, and it’s… enlightening. Moments pass before you finally return to yourself, and when he pulls back, his brows furrow at your pout.
“All good?”
You shake your head and go with honesty. “I didn’t think you’d cuddle me afterward.”
He smiles, thumb flicking your bottom lip. “You wanted me to fuck you?”
Your mouth falls open. “N-no—”
Then he leans down, lips brushing against your ear: “Don’t worry, love. Good girls get fucked hard.”
#simon riley smut#simon riley imagine#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#ghost x you#ghost x reader#ghost imagine#ghost smut#cod smut#cod x reader#cod fic#cod imagine#mw2 smut#mw2 x reader#mw2 imagine#.things i write
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