#I literally started writing in January lol

[midnightstargazer]

I'm super excited for the @ladiesofhpfest, and I can't wait to share with what I've been working on with y'all! Here are some sneak peeks at what I've got planned for each theme:

Mothers and Daughters

There will hopefully be two fics, a (mostly) fluffy one about Astoria raising Scorpius and a very angsty one about Barty Crouch Jr.'s mother and her decision to take his place in Azkaban. The Mrs. Crouch one is still a WIP - I only got the idea a few days ago - but hopefully it will be ready in time.

Senior Sweethearts

Come join me in an AU where a few things go differently in DH and, as a result, Andromeda gets to grow old surrounded by her loved ones. Also featuring a very sweet friendship between Andromeda and Astoria.

Out and Proud

For last year's fest I broke Emmeline Vance's heart in a fic titled Midnight Rain. This year, she meets Hestia Jones and gets another chance at love and happiness.

Women of the House of Black

For this theme, I'm exploring one of my favorite headcanons: that Iola Black, who was disowned for marrying a Muggle several generations ago, was never forgotten by the women of the family, and her story was passed down as a cautionary tale.

Character Chic

A character sketch of Marietta Edgecombe. What sort of person is she? Why did she betray the D.A.? How does she move on with her life with broken trust, gaps in her memory, and a mistake she made at sixteen permanently scarred onto her face?

Marauders Era Misses

I've been promising an Emmeline-centric first war fic for a while, and it's finally on its way! Despite being a very background character in canon, she's someone I have a lot of headcanons about - and here, I'll be delving into aspects of her story that I've alluded to but didn't fully explore in other fics, especially Midnight Rain and To Have Loved and Lost.

Women of Color

An eighth year fic starring Padma Patil, who returns to Hogwarts after the battle to finish her education and figure out what comes next. How do you go back to your ordinary life after a year like the one she and her peers have just been through?

Rebels and Renegades

The fic version of this Tumblr post: Dorcas Meadowes and Marlene McKinnon as Riddle Era women who remember Voldemort from their school days and are among the first to join the Order of the Phoenix. This is still very much a WIP and will probably be the longest fic I write for the fest - but luckily, the theme isn't until August, so I've still got plenty of time!

Next Gen Girlies

This was actually the first one I wrote for this summer's fest, featuring Molly and Lucy Weasley. The two sisters are very different people, but they love and support each other nevertheless. It's also yet another excuse for me to delve into the topic of squibs, which apparently I just can't stay away from.

[dancedance-resolution]

i started a supercorp portrait of a lady on fire au like three years ago. i'm never going to finish it, but the writing style is pretty cool, so i want to share it. so um enjoy the prologue and a bit of chapter one?

---

Prologue. Bonnelles, France. 1786.

“First, my contours,��� Kara said, her voice soft and level. She looked out upon the dozen or so young women, their eyes darting back and forth from their papers to Kara herself. “The outline,” she continued. The increasingly swift sound of scratching charcoal prompted Kara to further instruct, “Not too fast. Take time to look at me.” She paused. “See how my arms are placed.”

At that moment, Kara saw the painting.

She swallowed and took in a breath; she schooled her expression before letting out the air with a pathetically soft “My hands.” Her students’ gaze followed her verbal direction, now observing as Kara’s fingers curled with remembrance. Their own hands now began to sketch the slope of hers—the slope that had once coaxed breathy moans from a lover, the slope that had once created that very painting in all of its hollow longing.

Kara felt her heart rate accelerating, and her attempts at calming deep breaths only made her shoulders shake unsteadily. “Who brought that painting out?” Her eyes darted around, landing on each possible offender, as she tensed her core and adopted a stern countenance.

Every student dutifully turned to look at the work.

It was an especially young girl who finally lifted her hand. “I brought it. From the stock room. Should I have not?”

Kara’s “no” felt like a brick, its weight threatening to pry tears from her reddening eyes. So Kara took another swallow, a handful of blinks, a few more steadying breaths.

“Did you paint it?” the girl asked innocently. Nia, her name was? She stared at Kara, oblivious to the flood of sound overwhelming Kara’s mind and echoing in the cavern of her heart.

“Yes,” Kara uttered softly, the word barely audible as they fell from her lips. “A long time ago.”

Nia’s head snapped back to examine the painting once more. It stood on an old but sturdy easel, tattooed and scarred but still standing. The artwork itself was brooding, with a white sun bleeding into a dark vignette. Heavy clumps of clouds occupied the sky and caged some of the sun’s rays, so the fire burning behind the woman was bright enough in comparison to create a dragging shadow of her figure. The flames crawled up the back of her windswept dress, bringing sharp tension to an otherwise lulling, melancholy landscape.

“What’s the title?”

The sound of the sea began to swell in Kara’s head. Her lips trembled. Her body unwittingly swayed slightly. “Portrait of a Lady on Fire.”

---

Chapter I. The island of Brittany, France, and the surrounding sea. 1779.

Kara squinted into the distance, her face scrunching up a bit as she desperately tried to shield her eyes from the harsh glare of the sun on the water. For all its gorgeous teals and sparkling peaks, it certainly did make her wish for one of those brimmed hats the rowers were all wearing. With every one of their paced paddles, the cork-like little canoe bobbed haphazardly. Kara rather felt as if she were in the wine glass of a thoroughly drunken Marie Antoinette.

At least she wasn’t prone to seasickness.

She still felt quite unsteady, though, being thrown about and forced to pathetically grab onto the boat’s low walls. She leaned forward, trying to regain her balance and ground herself despite the absence of ground.

The wooden pallet holding her canvas was, apparently, as unstable as she was, and the next thing Kara knew, it had been lurched off of the boat like vomit from a drunkard. Kara watched helplessly as it thrashed among the choppy waves, the sea carrying it a few feet from the boat.

The chief rower met her desperate look with exhausted resignation; he ceased his paddling as Kara shed her overcoat and placed a precarious foot on the edge of the canoe.

With a strained creak from the boat’s wood, she jumped into the water, dress billowing behind her. Her first gasp for air upon emerging from the water was audible; she could feel the effort in her throat. Her arms moved in laborious little arcs as she slowly made her way towards the floating pallet and finally made a desperate reach for it. Kara’s fingers grasped onto a wooden board, and she pulled herself up onto it with a grunt.

---

The incessant wind upon the sea was certainly not helping Kara. Dripping wet, she wrapped herself up in her overcoat in a pitiful plea for warmth. She held the edges of the garment up to her lips, the sensation of the dry fabric bringing her some comfort as she closed her eyes and left herself to the mercy of the mighty sea.

But the interminable rocking of the feeble boat wouldn’t allow her any rest.

Kara wasn’t very religious, not anymore. Yet, the sight of the cliffs and coast of Brittany moved her to relieved prayer.

---

The sun had already begun to set as Kara trekked up the sandy coast. Her legs ached with every stumbling, unsure step—maybe she was a bit seasick after all—and her hands were tired of having to grip her full skirt to keep it out of her way.

She paused on the rocks, taking a moment to manually wring some of the water out of her skirt. She filled her lungs with an arduous breath before slinging the rope holding the pallet over her shoulder. Next came the fabric sling, which housed her trunk of personal items—she positioned it on her back with careful poise.

The journey up the cliffs and towards the trees was exhausting. Kara’s skirt required repositioning every few seconds, the rope was digging into her shoulder, and the pallet and trunk slammed into her back with each wobbling step. By the time she reached the straight path up to the residence, her breaths were heavy and pained, and the sun was nearly fully hidden beneath the horizon.

A soft light emanated from the windows above the mansion’s door, helping Kara feel a bit more secure as she knocked. A short blonde woman answered her summon and introduced herself with a flat “I’m Eve.” She opened the door a bit wider and gestured with her body for Kara to come in.

Eve held a small candle as she guided Kara up the stairs, the sounds of their shoes echoing through the grand yet starkly undecorated hallway. The walls of the stairwell were cement bricks, and the wrought iron bannister was rather plain and geometric.

They came to a stop in front of a similarly void room, bare save a few heavy curtains and a daybed. The raised panels along these walls matched the white-painted wood of the window frames, and they gave the chamber some elegant character.

While Eve entered the comparatively less intimidating room, Kara stayed back a moment, taking in the shafts of muted blue light from the windows and the contrasting warm glow of leaping flames from the central fireplace.

Eve crouched down to poke at the fire as Kara set down her belongings. “It was a reception room,” Eve explained. “Though I’ve never seen it used.”

The fire crackled pleasantly. “Have you been here long?” Kara inquired.

“Three years,” Eve answered, directing her attention back to the fire.

Kara peeled off her overcoat and draped it along the wainscoting. “Do you like it here?”

“Yes,” Eve said simply as she stood up. She turned to Kara, meeting her eyes now as her hands smoothed over her skirt. “I’ll let you get dry.” And with a nod, she was on her way.

Kara watched her every step.

Once the door closed, she hastily began removing her overskirt. It fell to the dark herringbone floor with an unglamorous thud.

---

There was no method or grace to the way Kara wrapped her hand around the rusting crowbar, but with a few jerks, she’d managed to successfully pry the top off of the pallet.

After setting down the wood cover, Kara extended her hand, letting it fall clumsily onto the slick canvas in front of her. It was still wet, and her hand’s small circular movement caused moisture to pool at her fingertips, as if her touch had beckoned the water. So her hand withdrew, and Kara slid the canvas out from its container. Her eyes danced over the surface as she considered how to dry it, holding it in front of herself like the Communion host of an evening Mass.

---

Kara decided to accompany her drying canvas, which was now positioned next to the fireplace. Stripped naked, she sat in front of the fire and pulled her legs towards herself—she was vulnerable, sitting there bare and in a new environment, and the action made her feel a bit more small, compact, and safe.

Kara set down her candle so she could light her tobacco pipe with the flames. Her large, smoky exhales grounded her, in a way, with the familiar sight and smell acting as a sort of sedative. And she stared forward, expression blank but unmistakably worn.

---

Kara walked barefoot along the cement floor, making her way through the hall and to the pantry room wrapped in nothing but her robe-like smock.

[silentwalrus1]

did somebody watch advent children

when i was 11 my father brought home a family movie.

[cospinol]

carefully skirting the issue of nerea in that last post, if he did die as per current canon it was 100% lorien’s fault but again lately i’m feeling like what if he Didn’t… letting him live undoes a huge portion of centre of the sun plot / setup but if i’m kind of overhauling all the anda and lyn stuff Anyways i can’t help but keep being like ok why not then

[dvrk-moon]

ENHYPEN ; 엔하이픈

HAVING AN IDOL S/O

requested : yes!!!

genre : fluff, crack

pairing : enhypen ot7 x fem!reader

warnings : cursing, this is long asfk LOL

HEESEUNG ; 희승

so you two trained together

and you mutually liked each other while training but didn’t really talk much

you ended up leaving bighit in early 2018 and going to train at cube instead

so you lost contact

but you ended up debuting as the maknae of (g)i-dle

and since you debuted before enhypen, you were more well known than they were initially

you were one of the more famous members in the group in korea, so your face was pretty inescapable

so imagine heeseung’s reaction when he sees a birthday ad for you for the first time

mind literally blown

so he’s like looking you and your group up to see if it’s really you (it is)

and he’s like damn i gotta get in contact with her again

but he doesn’t have an opportunity because even from a friends standpoint, he didn’t really have time because he had to focus on training and eventually going through i-land

ok skip forward and he’s debuted yay!!!!!

so you had a promotion period that’d lined up around a year and a half later where you made a duo debut with your member shuhua while enha was promoting manifesto

and heeseung saw you backstage once

between him seeing you for the first time up until that point he’d literally been trying to find out how to talk to you again

and this was his opportunity!

so before you went to perform heeseung approached you randomly

and lowkey you’d forgotten about heeseung until you saw him again lol

and you’re like oh hey… so awkward because what do you genuinely say to someone you haven’t talked to in like four years

but when you remember that he’s the heeseung that you talked to during your trainee days (the same heeseung you had a thing for) you are more willing to talk to him

but then your conversation is cut short because you have to go perform your song

when you come back, he’s still waiting for you :((((

like that man is COMMITTED to getting to talk to you again

so then after like thirty minutes of talking (right before he has to go promote his song) he finally gets the courage to ask for your number

and you’re like shit yeah

so he texts you like every day

and during your overlapping promotions, he tries to meet up with you backstage as frequently as possible

so eventually you gain feelings for him again (and he obviously does for you) and you start hanging out

but then he goes on tour for a while

you miss him a lot

and he misses you a lot

so when he comes back, he impulsively like picked you up while hugging and you’re like um okay MARRY ME

one hangout he finally asks you out (as more than friends) and you’re so excited

so you quickly begin dating :)

dating him is definitely like dating your number one supporter

like he makes it a point to meet you backstage (even if you don’t have an overlapping promotion) and he makes you teach him your choreography

and you’re like “heeseung i can teach you this at your or my dorm” and he’s like “nope i need everyone here to know that you only teach me your dances”

you’re like “???” but don’t question it bc he’s just odd

he prefers you to go over to his dorms because of his solo room but he’s not opposed to making friends with your members even though they’re all older than him

just know if you go over to enha’s dorms though they will 100% try to be around you all the time

and don’t get heeseung wrong, he obviously wanted the members to like you, but he also wasn’t anticipating his own girlfriend being stolen from him

you almost get caught by dispatch a couple times

but dispatch fr fr catches him at MAMA

like this man was so protective of his idol image for so long and the he watched your performance and dispatch was like “WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN”

does not gaf if you’re exposed tho bc he’s like “yup that’s my girlfriend suck it she’s MINE”

JAY ; 제이

so you debuted before him

by like a year and a half, so like january 2019

you were one of the members of itzy, which was the talk of the town for quite some time

and jay was actually a huge fan of your group since he was a trainee

your group had a few hit songs in korea but jay made it seem like every song of yours (yes this includes b sides)

you’d been his bias since your teaser dropped ofc

and he made it everyone’s problem to listen to your music during practice

even during i-land there were clips of him doing the shoulder move from ‘wannabe’

but i digress

so once his debut place is secured as of i-land episode 12 he was so excited that he might have the opportunity of meeting you

but like. he had to be normal about it

so he freaked out about you respectfully

but “respectfully” to him was mentioning you as his role model and ideal type

on like every variety program possible

like damn we get it!!!!

but your and his companies thought it would be just so silly and funny if they brought you out to meet him the next time he mentioned you

and so they did exactly that!!!

he was on weekly idol and all of a sudden you came out from where the staff were filming

he actually almost fainted on the spot

and you thought it was sooo cute that he was that flattered over meeting you

so you approached him and asked him for his number

cue him almost passing out pt 2

but you end up talking quite a bit

like u come visit him quite often and he comes to visit you

and he like is literally like the perfect talking stage

so it takes like zero time for you guys to actually start dating

but when he can’t visit you he’s texting you all the time

“your stage was so good how are you real”

always buying albums for each other for support

and he’s like $$ so he buys a ton of yours (and of his if you want some)

he gets so excited when he pulls your photocard and is so happy when you pull his because he thinks it’s fate

but the one time he caught riki’s photocard in the back of your phone he swapped it out for his almost immediately

he always jokes about his bias being yuna, and so you’ve started to make a point of saying your bias is jungwon and sunghoon

and because you did that you took a picture of you and jungwon once to send to him like “proof that my bias is jungwon”

that pic became his lock screen btw

you one time said that you were an enhypen fan and midzy and engene were freaking out

they were like “just date already smh”

little did they know that you already were!

JAKE ; 제이크

you were a year and a half their junior

and you debuted in kep1er

so the time that they were promoting blessed cursed you were promoting wa da da

and like you’d just debuted too

so you had just done a stage and were on your way to your groups van to go back to the dorms

and you go to enter the first black van you see with an open door

and instead of your members you’re met with jake sunghoon sunoo!

you turned red immediately and ran in the other direction to actually find your van where yujin, yeseo, chaehyun, and hiyyih were waiting for you

you told your members and they thought it was so funny

but jokes on them

because the very next week, jake had accidentally walked into your waiting room at mcountdown

who’s laughing now!!! (you are)

after the incident, he found you and came to apologize for walking in

and you were like “ohhh that’s so funny because i actually was the one who came into your van last week!”

but after the apologies were exchanged, you two ended up walking around backstage anyways and just talking about anything and everything

after you and your members had to go perform, jake just waited for you backstage

and once you were done performing you came back and talked to him more ! yay !

but then soon enha had to go on to perform b-c and by the time he came back, your group had already left :’(

it’s okay though because you left your phone number on a post-it that said “FOR JAKE” in their waiting room

enhypen teased him so hard but he was like whatever at least i got her number

so he texted you like almost immediately

soon after, you two texted like all the time and started meeting backstage whenever it was possible

jake asked you out for the first time right before you went on stage to perform and obviously you said yes

but when you went to perform, your voice was such a bright red color that it went viral amongst kep1ians (and later other fandoms)

after that stage, jake and you just sat and talked in the kep1er waiting room for sooooo long

he’s literally the biggest fan of your group

like he’s so open and genuine about how much he likes your group, and he always somehow has one of your songs on his recommendation playlists

and those songs will somehow always be sandwiched between the most beautiful love songs ever and it makes engenes go 🤨🤨

you also are open about being a fan of them

so basically your fans and his have already put two and two together very quickly

but the suspicions were confirmed when he posted a late-night river view picture on weverse and then you posted something extremely similar a couple days later

winning the idgaf war about people finding out though

like he’s like DONTTTT CAREEEEE <3 MY GF

he actually thinks it’d be better if people knew so that no one would try anything on you because you’re taken

SUNGHOON ; 성훈

you were the seventh member of ive, also known as wonyoung’s group

and like wonyoung is your bff

she knew you found sunghoon cute from all the times you’d asked her if you could come visit her on music bank days

so she wanted to play matchmaker!

(love me not reference?!?!)

anyways

she gets “sick” once and is like “hey y/n why don’t you stand in for me?”

and you’re like “yeah sure whatever idc it’s chill”

it’s not chill

for reference, sunghoon also thought it was going to be chill, because he had no idea that you were standing in for wonyoung

little did wonyoung know, sunghoon also found you very attractive

ofc he would’ve tried to get your number through wonyoung, but he was too introverted to even think about it

so when you get there, both of your faces are pretty red, but your cheeks at least cool down by the time you’re recording

his do not 😭

he’s like sneaking looks at you and shit

he thought he was being so subtle too about it like bye 😭😭

but fans love the interactions!!!!

and they’re sooooo stoked to have jungwon sunoo and sunghoon on the radio that you host after the fact

sunghoon fucking DRESSES for the occasion too like damn

and like you made a point to be like “nice outfit”

on the outside he was like “yeah it’s whatever” but on the inside he was shitting his pants

anyways

and so you asked him for his number because you wanted “fashion tips” (you’re a liar)

so the first time he asks you out he’s like “let me style u an outfit”

and then while doing that he’s like “let’s date!”

and you’re like “well alright”

(jk u were just as stoked)

and dating him is so relieving

because you don’t have to keep the relationship (at least beyond friends) a secret

fans love the interactions

and so when you guys actually announce the relationship everyone is so hyped

like they already expected it

but still

he never misses an opportunity to talk about you on live or on a variety show

the interviewer is like “so, sunghoon, what was your favorite part of this comeback?”

he thinks for a second. then all of a sudden, “well y/n-”

like bro we get it

he just does not even care tho bc he’s so down bad

SUNOO ; 선우

okay now so remember when sunoo was a radio dj?

yeah

so you debuted in billlie, and your song, gingamingayo had just been released

and sunoo had heard it quite a few times already on his dj show

and he’s like “ok damn i get it let me look up the song”

he became a fan so quickly

like learned the choreo and everything

so the following week on the radio show he’s like “oh have you guys heard this song it’s so good actually i’m a fan of this group”

and then BOOM next week you’re on the show he radio djs for

chemistry between u guys went CRAZY

and then you filmed a tiktok together

and posted it like a week after the radio episode had gone viral

engenes and belllie’ves went crazy

you guys had already exchanged numbers at that point too

so getting to laugh about your fans freaking out was super fun to you two

you started visiting him at radio show schedules in secret after the fact

so he ends up asking you out about a month later

and ofc you say yes

so once you started dating, he would visit you at your schedules a lot

you would often pretend to be a staff member at the radio show so you could be there without raising much question

but then one time you were a “special guest” on the radio show again, and you filmed another tiktok, but this time it wasn’t like one of your group’s dance challenges

it was like a cute trend

so once you got the okay to post it, you did

this confirmed to engenes and belllie’ves that you were friends at the very least

he always finds a way to sing your songs on live

doesn’t ever sing when it’s your part though 🤨🤨🤨 it’s almost like he wants to hear your voice

one time he came to one of your fansigns “anonymously”

people found out it was him so quickly 😭

he’s so shameless about people knowing though

after that, fans basically already know you’re dating even if you don’t outright say anything

nobody actually cares though

they’re just waiting for that third y/noo tiktok 🙏

JUNGWON ; 정원

you debuted in illit, as a result of the belift survival show “r u next?”

you came in first place, just like jungwon did on i-land

so naturally, under the same sublabel, illit and enhypen passed each other quite frequently

you’ve actually interacted quite a bit with the other members

but for some reason, their leader was a bit standoffish to you

and you had absolutely no idea why he would be

you thought that maybe it was because you’d also come in first place on your respective survival show, so maybe he had one sided beef with you?

it didn’t make sense but that’s just what you assumed

actually ☝️🤓 jungwon had a big fat crush on you

and had no idea what to do about it

like he secretly supported you on r u next? and everything

so eventually, belift decides to make a variety show for illit and enha

as the first place winners, you two are paired together, along with your japanese maknaes, ni-ki and iroha

iroha and ni-ki were already acquainted, so iroha told ni-ki about how funny it was that you and jungwon were in the same group, given that jungwon hated you

and ni-ki’s like ?!

so he like goes up to jungwon and is like “she thinks you hate her bro”

he’s so embarrassed to find out that you thought he hated you

ni-ki teases him so hard about it

so eventually jungwon admits to you (off-camera) that he doesn’t hate you, and in fact he’s quite fond of you

it lifts the biggest weight off his chest when you also admit that you’re fond of him, and that he was your role model ever since you’d joined r u next?

after filming, you two exchange numbers

he’s such a baby like seriously how could you think he hated you

it doesn’t take long AT ALL for you to start dating

in fact hybe/belift encourages it because they think it’ll be good exposure for both groups

and it highkey is

in korea, you guys gain the title of “first place couple” and omgggg knetz eat that up

you’re invited on a ton of variety shows together

jungwon is sooooo so supportive and is lowkey a stan of your group

he like sends you your fancams and is like “teach me this dance pls”

when your two groups pass each other in the hallways, enha and illit always make it a point to tease you two

you guys don’t mind though because at least you have each other ☝️☝️

RIKI ; 니키

you debuted as the maknae of loona

so you’d been in the industry a few years longer than enhypen had

so riki knew of you, but you weren’t super familiar with them

but the both of you were invited onto a variety program for foreign idols

you ended up becoming more familiar with them after being paired together with riki for a couple challenges

one interaction you had made you two go completely viral after executing a twice choreography together extremely well

both bbc and belift saw this as an opportunity to make some money, so they kinda forced you and riki to get close

little did they know that’s what you both wanted anyways lol

so like you’ll have a live with him

or you’ll film a tiktok together

or you’ll post something together

etc

somewhere along the lines you two start dating in secret

namely after you two filmed a live together

and he saw one of the comments that said “y/n please do perfect idol challenge” and you started doing the perfect idol dance on live

you started giggling because you started to forget the dance because you were embarrassed and he was smiling like a fucking maniac and then he realized he really really liked you more than a friend

and so soon after he didn’t wanna waste any more time and he just confessed that he liked you

and you were like “no way me too!!!!”

(everyone could tell)

it wasn’t super in secret though

because belift/bbc had that “bffs for life” image for you two

so you could interact freely

it just took every bone in riki’s body to not grab your hand and pull you into his arms during a dance live

but then womp womp

dispatch exposes you guys like four months into the relationship

no one cares though (except delulu fans)

so when you terminate your contract with bbc for the mistreatment, engenes beg you to audition for hybe/belift because they’re afraid if you go somewhere else you won’t be able to interact freely with him anymore and they love your interactions

you end up joining ctd, which is the company of one of the post-loona acts, along with five of your ex-members

luckily ctd is a good company so they let you and riki still stay together and still have your lives

one time riki was doing a weverse live and you showed up

and fans absolutely LOVED it

ctd is an unknown company so they unexpectedly got a lot more sales with this relationship

they were like DAMN OK

anyways

you guys teach each other your choreos A LOT

like a lot

riki eats them up so bad like fans start saying he’s the seventh member of your group 😭

a/n : had to include illit in this somehow i love them they’re so cute. sorry for the lack of posts i am sooooooo fucking busy and this was in the drafts for forever

[gilmore-angel]

unexpected pleasures || A.T x fem!reader

summary ♱ reader has just wed the infamous aemond targaryen, and though she's nervous, she will soon discover there are many pleasurable things to come (tldr reader gets finger fucked good)

warnings/contains ♱ arranged marriage, awkwardness at first, smut obvi, sub!reader dom!aemond, fingering, praise kink!! use of good girl, pretty girl, wife. overall very fluffy!! soft!aemond<3. let me know if I should add anything else!!

authors note ♱ okok this is probably trash but I'm literally forcing myself to write rn<3 lol anyways this is also my first time actually writing for aemond which is crazy bc I've been obsessed with him since like early January💀. if you enjoy please reblog! likes are obviously appreciated but reblogs are the thing that actually help the writer<3 oh and lmk if you want a part two!!

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married life isn't so bad after all.

of course, you've only been married for about three hours now, but it's going better than expected, which at this point is all you can hope for.

your new husband, prince aemond, has been quite pleasant thus far. you have only had roughly six full conversations since you were betrothed two months ago, but based off of them he was very polite and well educated.

though you had dreaded the wedding day, everything had gone smoothly. the ceremony itself was a big event, full of lords and ladies you didn't even know the house of, all eager to get on the new princesses good side. and of course there was the kiss you shared with aemond, one that sent an unknown feeling through you, settling at your lower belly. and now, the grand feast to celebrate the union.

it had less people there, only family and the very important houses were allowed to attend. you sat at the table in the middle, sitting in the center along with your husband. on your other side sat your father, mother and siblings, the same went for aemond. your husband stayed mostly silent during the feast, only speaking when spoken to.

your belly slightly ached with nerves for what was coming next; the bedding. thankfully, the queen had insisted upon a private bedding, just as she did for her other children when they wed. the action soothed your nerves a bit, but they still clung to you.

you had been warned by your mother that the bedding was an uncomfortable and painful process for the woman. but she also informed you that it is something all woman must do to please their lord husband and produce heirs.

you felt your heart sink when the king stood up weakly to announce it was time for you and aemond to head to your chambers. you both stood up and gave your goodbyes, your mother giving you a reassuring smile before you left.

there was an awkward silence as you walked with your husband to your chambers, escorted by guards. you glanced at him, only to see him looking straight ahead, blank expression on his handsome face.

once you arrived the guards pushed open the heavy wooden doors. you gave them a small smile in thanks before aemond dismissed them. as the doors closed aemond let out a small shaky sigh, you couldn't tell if it was out of nervousness or dread. you both stood awkwardly, unsure of where to begin. he spoke first, breaking the deafening silence.

"would you like help taking down your hair?" he blurted out. you nodded, giving him a awkward small smile.

"please," you moved past him to sit at the vanity. you began taking out the many odd placed pins and braids in your hair. aemond came up from behind you to start assisting in the process. the feeling of his long fingers in your hair made up for the times he would accidentally tugged too hard trying to take down the hairstyle. you both worked in silence, the only word spoken was his occasional 'sorry's when he would notice you wince.

now that your hair was down, the room was once again filled with an thick silence. eventually you stood up, turning to face him. you sucked in a breath, looking up at him nervously.

"should i..... should I remove my clothes, my prince?"

his eyes widened at the question, but he nodded, "yes, my lady... I can help."

he moved behind you, undoing the laces of the dress with shaky fingers. the gorgeous dress fell to the floor, pooling around your feet. you stepped out of the dress, leaving you in a silky shift and small clothes. you felt quite vulnerable as you begun taking your shift off, even more so once it was gone.

aemond let out a shaky breath at the sight of you in nothing but your small clothes. he looks up and down your body, desire filling his eye. he walks closer to you, looking deep into your eyes.

"may I kiss you, my lady?" he asked, his usual cold tone gone, now replaced with a soft, caring one. you nod, eyes wide.

aemond smiled softly before leaning down and kissing your soft lips. this kiss was unlike the other one you both had shared just hours before. this one was out of pure want, not obligation.

you gasp softly against his lips when he deepened the kiss, your hands flying up to his strong shoulders. his hands found home on your hips. he pulled away just enough to whisper against your lips, "is this okay?"

you nod, staring up at him with wide eyes. "yes, my prince, I just... I don't really know how to do this properly."

he smiles at you softly, moving one of his hands to caress your cheek gently.

"that's okay, just copy what I do, okay?"

he leans back in, kissing at a slow pace. his lips are soft and warm against your own. you feel something wet poking at your bottom lip and soon realize it's his tongue. you open your mouth slightly and gasp when he slides his tongue in, exploring where he can reach. the sensation causes a soft whimper to fall from your lips.

he begins pushing you backwards gently until the back of your knees hit the edge of the plush bed behind you, causing you to lay down on it. to your surprise, aemond gets on his knees before you and pulls you down so your legs hang off the bed. leaning up on your elbows you look down at him extremely confused. "my prince... what are you doing?"

he simply smiled and blushed, "let me know if you wish to stop, okay my lady?". his big calloused hands went up and down your thighs, pulling them apart. you laid back, too embarrassed to look him in the eyes. his hands eventually found their way to your small clothes.

"may I remove these, my lady?" one hand continued rubbing you thigh gently. you hum and nod. that wasn't good enough apparently and aemond lightly pinched your thigh. "words, wife. I need to hear some words out of those pretty lips."

you blushed deeply, taking a deep breath, "yes, please take them off."

he smiles, murmuring under his breath "good girl". you felt a tingle in your lower belly, growing each time he touched or talked to you.

he carefully slid your small clothes off, throwing them somewhere in the room. he sucked in a big breath at the sight of your bare cunt. you squirmed slightly, his gaze lighting you on fire almost.

"may I touch you, wife?" he spoke softly, a poorly hidden desire behind the words.

you nod but quickly remember what he told you. "yes, you may."

with one hand he softly rubbed your thigh, with the other he rubbed one finger up and down your lips, pushing past them and exploring the wet outside. your back slightly arched at the unknown but not unwelcomed feeling. he moved his finger higher until he found your clit. a high pitched whimper escaped your lips at his soft but achingly good touch.

he looked up at you with a sweet smile. "does that feel nice, wife?". his finger moved in gentle circles, pressing ever so slightly.

a few breathy whimpers and moans slipped out of your mouth. "yes," you breathed, "so so nice..."

he let out a hmm, continuing his movements. he moved his finger up and down, gathering your wetness and then spreading it around your sensitive clit. as he rubbed on your bundle of nerves, his other hand came up, softly pressing against your slit.

"this may feel strange, my lady, but I promise it'll feel so good soon, okay?" he pushed a long thick finger into your previously untouched hole, groaning at how tight you were. your back arched off the bed as a loud moan rang around the room. he slowly started moving it in and out, sending waves of pleasure through your body when he curled his finger upwards. your gummy walls tightened around him, almost as tight as he cock felt in his trousers.

he looked up to see your reaction, smiling when he saw your head thrown back in pleasure. soft whimpers left your mouth as his movements quickened.

"may I add a second finger, sweet girl?" something about the way he said the affectionate name sent chills down your spine as you slightly bucked against his hand.

"hmmph, yes, yes please husband." he smirked as he added a second finger. he pumped them in and out fast, his other hand still focused on your puffy clit.

suddenly a new feeling hit you. like some sort of knot in your belly, ready to explode any second. a panicked expression washed over you at the strange sensation.

"aemond, aemond! something is, fuck, happening!" you cried desperately, clenching the sheets beneath you hard.

"shh, it's okay, it'll feel so good. just let it happen sweet girl." it was too much and too little, it was overwhelming yet you needed more. it hurt but felt so so right.

before you could reply waves and waves of pleasure washed over you, drowning you in the feeling of him. your whole body shook, hips bucking wildly into his hand. creamy white cum drooled onto his fingers and hand. he groaned at the sight and fucked you through your peak.

he eventually slid his hand out and climbed up the bed, hovering over you. he brought his cum covered fingers to you mouth, "open," he commanded softly, sucking in a shaky breath when you wrapped you lips around them. he pulled them out, moving to caress your cheek, "such a good girl."

he began kissing your neck, trailing his hand back down to your thighs. you whimpered sweetly causing him to chuckle.

"oh, sweet wife, we are just getting started."

[sweetmodel]

hiii ! out of curiosity , do you know how many years you have spent outside of this reality ? like you could be 18 ( for example ) here , but your consciousness has actually lived for 33 years ( another random example ) - also you dont need to share your real age because that is personal information !!! thank you so much and you are literally my favourite tumblr account

Hello! I'm going to be honest but I don't really add up time together. It just stopped making sense to me once I started shifting. Because like, okay you add the time you were in your intended reality, but what about the years before? I mean, you lived there too in the past, you now have all the memories and knowledge, do you add those too? Also to me time is just really 3D-centric so I really don't care about it. The more I shift the more I feel like I know less and less lol.

But rambling aside cause that's not what anyone asked for, here's how much time I consciously spent in each reality, without counting the past of each life and all of their memories:

1-Canon Winx reality, from January 2022 to March 2022, my very first reality;

2-Fairy-Demon reality (based on a book I'm writing), from January 2023 to December 2023. This is the longest I stayed in a reality without shifting back and forth;

3-Superhero reality (not based on any sort of media here, Its mostly a niche reality I built off a dream I had long ago), okay this one is tripping me up because Its also a TV series I'm filming and I'm not sure what has and hasn't happened yet but I would say... During June-July 2022, then I was there again from March 2023 to September 2024... But I skipped a few weeks because I was going through a break up there, if you read one of my posts you might understand what I'm talking about ;) ;

4-Wizard reality (based on the game Wizard101), January 2024 to end of May 2024;

5-Fame reality/life, from September 2023 to October of 2025. Technically the longest, but also I would shift back and forth from my fame life to the next reality I'm listing, so it wasn't two years straight;

6-Fairy-Angel reality (A fusion/mashup between Winx and the book reality), this is the one I currently keep shifting to and so far it has been from January 2024 to May 2024, and probably the one I will stick to because I'm still trying to digest my fame life lol.

I don't use/have "time ratios', when I shift back to a reality (whichever it be, this one or any other one) is exactly when I "left it off";

But anyway, thanks for the compliment! (And sorry for any typos Its really late here).

[agentstarkid]

SERENDIPITY ✦ DR3

“Serendipity is an unexpected and very lucky finding, that is, a coincidence that fills us with happiness. Serendipity in love implies the feeling that the universe conspires in our favor, bringing that special person into our lives at the right time and oh boy, did the universe send her everything she ever needed in the form of a 5'10" man with a built-in accent, a love for Tim Tams, adrenaline-fueled spirit and a smile that could light up a whole town.”

✦ PAIRING: daniel ricciardo x famous!latina!reader

✦ PIT BOARD: social media au | ✦ FACE CLAIM: becky g

✦ TRACK LIMITS: female!reader, covid-19 & quarantine mentions, age gap, language.

✦ MAY'S RADIO: HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY BESTIES! 🤗💗 I've been working on this for a month, honestly I thought I was gonna finish it fast but tbh that was really naïve of me 🥴 the amount of times I ended up changing almost every little thing is insane lol but today I sat down and commited to finish and post this! this is my first ever smau or any kind of 'x reader' really, so please be kind 🤍 and of course it was going to be about the love of my life! — oh btw, my idea is to get to present time and make it angsty so let me know what you guys think! I really hope you enjoy!

series masterlist | general masterlist | next chapter >

JANUARY 01, 2020

yourinstagram and danielricciardo added to their stories!

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danielricciardo has followed yourinstagram!

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yourinstagram

♡ liked by anitta, danielricciardo and 6,546,214 others

yourinstagram 2019 was full of happiness, pain, healing and growth. I loved a lot, I cried a lot and I laughed a lot. I'm grateful for a lot of things in life, but I'm specially grateful for you guys ❤️🥂 I LOVE YOU! ❤️

tagged: selenagomez, fioamato, iamdannaschwarz, itsvittoriasousa

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fioamato It's out with the old and in with the new ⏭️😜

iamdannaschwarz this could be the start of something new indeed 😏🤭 yourinstagram 🙈 user yourinstagram girlieee does this mean you found your Troy Bolton tonight? 👀👀👀

iamdannaschwarz what a year it has been! Through the ups and downs you prevailed. So proud of you! Cheers, amiga! 🥂❤️

itsvittoriasousa u deserve the whole world, i wish everyone knew ur heart 🥺 love you biiiiiiig ❤️

user1 can we talk about that dress!!!! jaw dropped 🤯

user2 Mami 🔥🔥🔥

selenagomez ❤️🥂🎆

user3 danny ric you ain't slick baby we can see u 👀

user4 words on the streets that they were seen pretty close the whole night 👀

user5 girlies do we think the writing on the napkin belongs to mr. ricciardo? 🧐

user4 what about the last pic?? could it be about a nod to him???

user3 somebody call the fbi and the cia we need to decode this 🔎🔎🔎

sebastianyatra una locura de año 🚀 happy new year penguin!

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JANUARY 25, 2020

justjared

♡ 9.075 Likes

justjared New couple alert?! YN LN, 21, and Formula 1 driver Daniel Ricciardo, 30, were spotted on a walk and getting cozy during a night out in New York. More photos now on JustJared.com #YNLN #Daniel Ricciardo Photos: Backgrid

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user1: well that's a couple nobody saw coming 😶 good for them tho

user2: These pictures are so creepy as to get these they literally have to stalk these people and are probably hiding in bushes or wherever to get the shots

user3: he's a full-grown man in his 30s messing around with a teenager how shocking 🙄

user4: how is she a teenager if she's 21??? she is a consenting adult and has been for a while...make it make sense user5: it's a 9-year age gap not 25 😑 y'all should learn to mind your own fucking business

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FEBRUARY 05, 2020

danielricciardo added to their story!

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yourinstagram added to their story!

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yourinstagram

♡ liked by danielricciardo, greeicy and 7,452,325 others

yourinstagram starry nights, sunsets, little moments, deep conversations & special feelings 💖🃏

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iamdannaschwarz pov: you were there to witness the first conversation 🤣

itsvittoriasousa never knew a person could blush that hard 😂 yourintagram you are both getting blocked 🙅‍♀️

fioamato 🃏🃏🃏

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michaelitaliano and scottyjames31 have followed yourinstagram!

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MARCH 11 & 12, 2020

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yourinstagram has added to their story!

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APRIL 09, 2020

yourinstagram

♡ liked by danielricciardo, jbalvin and 5,723,498 others

yourinstagram Quarantine with an aussie boyfriend: turns out, 'G'day mate' is the only greeting you'll ever need. Who needs handshakes anyway? Also, you get to excessively use the word 'mate' without being judged. It's basically a linguistic free pass 🤷🏽‍♀️😂🇦🇺

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user: OMG OMG IT'S FUCKING HAPPENING!!!! EVERYBODY STAY CALM!!!

user: Dan-Y/N nation how we feeling today? 😍

user: wasn't she dating sebastianyatra tho?

user2: nah they've been friends for years

user3: «cristina» is lowkey about her tho 🤭 "you were 19, i was 23"?? and there's a 4 year age gap between them?? they deffff had something going on a few years back AT LEAST 👀

user2: who knows maybe they did, but they refer to each other as "like-a-brother" and "like-a-sister" so as far as we know they are only best friends 🤷🏽‍♀️

fioamato what do you say titi yourmomsinstagram does it get the seal of approval?

yourmomsinstagram 🤔🤔🤔 yourinstagram she face-timed me and told me to pass the phone so she could talk to him. They talked for an hour. They are besties now, she's just trying to play hard-to-get 🙃

danielricciardo and 5,345 other liked it

fioamato 😂😂😂

jbalvin encantado de verte feliz hermanita ❤️

danielricciardo tell your boyfriend he's really lucky 🤙🏼

yourinstagram thanks will do, mate 🤙🏼

user OMG??? you guys are so unserious 😭

user2 MOM??? DAD???

user3 danielricciardo yourinstagram i'm glowing, flourishing and thriving 🥰😭

michaelitaliano shitty accent though

yourinstagram I love my haters ❤️ you guys are my motivators ☺️ btw don't you have a kangaroo to fight?

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APRIL 29, 2020

yourinstagram

♡ liked by michaelitaliano, danielricciardo, lewishamilton and 6,498,498 others

yourinstagram Spanglish country…we’re doing it!! Watch kanebrown_music and I blend sounds, languages and dance moves in #LostInTheMiddleOfNowhere (Spanish Remix) 😜 song and video OUT NOW 🔥

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iamcardib OKAAAY MAMAAA 🧊🧊🥶

lali ALTA DIOSA 🔥

user she 👏 never 👏 misses 👏

itsvittoriasousa BRO U ABSOLUTELY ATEEE

user jaw drops to floor eyes pop out of sockets hearts out of chest 😍

danielricciardo wow caliente 🔥

user the amount of unwell I am in this exact moment

user2 daniel is right. muy caliente 🥵

user3 i'm losing my mind over 2 words + emoji okay

user4 daniel stop being a cunt and make an appearence in one of Y/N's ig lives

user5 user4 you could totally hear his voice in the last one lmao

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MAY 03, 2020

danielricciardo

♡ liked by pierregasly, jensonbutton, iamdannaschwarz and 710,610 others

danielricciardo Just a bunch of life 🤠🚜🇦🇺🇺🇸

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yourinstagram awesome taste in music mate 👍🏼

danielricciardo big fan of hers 👍🏼 love finding new underground artists ☺️ user imagine calling THE yourinstagram an "underground artist" lmaooo user2 they're both such little shits i love them your honor 😭

kristenanniebell ❤️❤️❤️

scottyjames31 I see you're in good company mate

corey_wilson goodness I miss the ranch so much

user daniel said lemme give you thirsty bitches a few droplets of water

user2 there's so much to unpack here omfg

iamdannaschwarz you're welcome 😌 also there's a no-return policy in the contract ok bye

fioamato you're welcome 😌 x2 itsvittoriasousa you're welcome 😌 x3 danielricciardo nah i think i'm gonna keep it for a long while thanks. i'll rate you guys with 5 stars 👍🏼

user3 THE LETTER ON THE LAST PHOTO ???? I'M SENDING Y'ALL MY THERAPY BILLS

user4 THE MATCHING RINGS PLEASE!!!!!!! 😭😭😭

user5 all this soft launch shit is killing me guys help somebody let them know that we already know so they can stop playing!!!

yourinstagram but where's the fun in that babes? 😌 user holy shittttt!!!! y/n ???? i- 🤯 user5 OH MY GOD!!!! HI MOTHER AJKFFLAHDASD user2 it's a fucking confirmation!!!! dan-y/n nation we got it!!! it's crumbs but we got it!!!!!

user6 we stan a suportive bf ☝️🤩

user7 999 for grammy's best album of the year ✨manifesting✨

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─── Please don't forget to reblog & comment! ♡

[walks-the-ages]

Every Autistic+ADHD person should have a Public Domain character as their special interest. It is so great.

You can go hog wild collecting books, movies, adaptions, and sharing all of your Public Domain finds freely.

You can write your own fanfiction and *its not even fanfiction its just its own canon.*

You can make your own custom covers and print your own custom versions of the books.

You can freely rewrite the books and publish them if you want.

You can change a character's pronouns and make them queer as much as you want.

You can make as much art and AUs as you want and you could literally make them their own published series if you wanted.

You can know the joy of receiving a 96 year old book in the mail in a language you can't even read yet but know that you can scan it and upload it to the Internet Archive because it is Public Domain and being able to see the original text is going to make someone's entire week.

You can start learning a new language just to be able to read the original works from a hundred years ago in their native tongue.

You can feel the Hatred of Disney for the Mickey Mouse Protection Act meaning the USA is one of the only countries in the world that doesn't have the entire series of books that are your special interest in the Public Domain which they should have been over a decade ago , but now at least you have something to look forward to on January 1st for the next decade, give or take a few gaps years of nothing entering the Public Domain!

This is about Arsene Lupin by Maurice Leblanc, first published in 1905 through to 1941, but I would *love* to hear about everyone's Public Domain blorbos in the notes lol.

[biconickyoshi]

Currently in a long ass line for early voting (PLEASE VOTE IF YOU LIVE IN THE USA BTW, so many of our rights are at stake!!!) and I got a kudos email from ao3 for The Avatar and the Fire Prince… so I went to check and I now have 3,002 kudos??? 🤯😭

I just wanna say thank you so so SO much to everyone who has taken the time to read this fic - I never in my wildest dreams could have imagined that it would ever get this much attention when I first started posting it way back in January 2022. I even gave up posting for several months after the first couple chapters because I wasn’t confident in my ability to write, and was overcritical of myself. But since December 2022, I’ve done my best to keep up with updating TAatFP at least once a month, and I’m proud to say that I’ve been able to keep up with that fairly well for the most part.

TAatFP is a labor of love and truly one of the only things I’ve ever managed to maintain a vested interest in almost 3 years after starting it. I still literally think about this fic every day (even if I don’t always write for it every day, and I’m so glad I do lol.

It’s really funny to me that despite being a superfan of AtLA since 2007, I was not even a Zukaang shipper until late 2021 when I had my epiphany about the ship, and now it has become my top ship above anything else in any other fandom despite not even being canon! I’m SO happy that TAatFP has opened so many people’s eyes to the potential of the ship!

Anywayyyyy I hope you all have a great Halloween! I’m going to be spending the next week playing Dragon Age: The Veilguard (I took off work for it lmao), so I apologize if the next TAatFP chapter is posted later than usual - though I’ve already managed to get a large chunk of it written thankfully, so hopefully it won’t be too much later than usual.

(Also, I’m sorry that I haven’t gotten to responding to comments for the last two chapters for those who have taken the time to leave them - it’s been a busy couple of months, and I really need to just sit down and answer them all in a chunk 😅)

I appreciate all of you so much! ❤️❤️❤️

- KJ

[flymetosnarryland]

A little progress.

I'm working on "Infraction." My precious baby, uh. This art is part of it in a way. Eileen Prince and Tobias Snape. When people are falling in love everything seems easy, but then life happen.

(I'd like to talk about how things are going with Infraction.)

I'm back on it since couple of weeks and working on it is intense (my brain is literally boiling). I don't think I ever planned a story for that long. The first idea has born 6th January this year. I was writing down (like crazy) everything I wanted to be in this fic. During first months it was chaotic and messy, but brought me so much joy. When I've had everything that (I thought) I needed, I wrote first chapters, yeah. And then shared them, because was so excited about all of it and just couldn't wait. Gosh.

Now I... hm... well, maybe not "regret" it, but I think, I totally should have wait. Why is that? First thing first, this story is not ready yet for being written in, you know, final version. It's too fat, lol.

I may want too much from it. There is a lot, like, seriously, A LOT of things to cover. First notes took me around 80 pages and it had many gaps in it (too much if you ask me). Things I needed to figure out and fill in, in the same time making everything work together. Because this Snarry is not sprinkled with crime. It's filled with murder, political shenanigans, family shiteshow and tough, not always appropriate, love. There are secrets and lies, blackmails and history that matter. Backstory of many people, whose actions over the years supposed to bring us to the point where we are now. And, you know, all of it gives me the thrill. First time in my life I feel like a true Puppet Master.

So, couple weeks ago I started to write a proper outline, if I can call it like that. To put everything in order and, going from the very beginning, to fill all the gaps. To answer all the questions I was asking myself in notes. To figure out the missing clues, some details without I couldn't go further and with that - to find out how characters will change facing new situations. How they will grow (I really love this part). Sometimes I think, "why am I even doing it?" I could just write some cosy, little fic where Harry and Severus' silly problems would be the main goal of the story. Like, focusing on them should be enough, right? Why am I going for all the other things, if I just want them to shag and have their happy end after all? 😂

Well, if it's not for fun, I don't know the other reason. The level of excitement is just incredible. I don't know, if what I'm writing is good or bad. If it really has sense, because I've always seen myself rather as a potato, not as a great mastermind who can plot some good shite, you know. That said, "Infraction" feels even more challenging that I ever thought it will be. But I feel deep inside that I can do it. Going step by step where the main plan leads and... it just feels good.

I've started in October 1989. Now I'm in January 2011. It means that I managed to finish everything that happen before the fic starts, lol. And, actually, I almost covered the first part of the book. So, two more to go? Hehe. It'll take time, yes. It's crazy how much I want to continue writing the main chapters, not only swim in the plan-phase. Drawing the series of "Muggle London" art helped me a lot with easing this itch. However, it's still there. I know, though, that I have to finish it. The whole outline, I mean. Without it, things can go south.

That said, I can't tell how long it will take. Couple weeks? Maybe months. This is really... a lot of work and I want to be proud of it. Even more so, because this fic means a lot to me. I know it may not be, you know, mind blowing or something. But I hope that giving it all my love, it could be, you know, not that bad for reading, hehe.

[celerydays]

could you walk us through what notebooks & journals & pens /etc you use - they look so good!

I would be SO happy to, you have no idea!!

Alright, let's fucking GOOOO~

Starting off with my current "workhorse" pens - I have like *checks notes* 36 fountain pens and a bit too many inked up atm, but these are just the ones I'm currently reaching for or have inked up more often than not:

TWSBI Go (F): Kinda ugly! But also kinda cute! It's cheap and works great (I friggin love TWSBI pens tbh) and it has a little hole on the cap where you can attach a lanyard or charms, like I did! Makes it cuter imo and it's kind of my emotional support pen these days.

Opus88 Pocket (EF): This 2022 edition has a little Moon tarot design on the cap so it's pretty much the pen I use exclusively for my witchy/tarot practice journals! A lil bummed the cap doesn't post, especially since its a shorter pocket-sized pen, but not a deal breaker and I still love it.

Pilot Custom 823 (F): My grail pen that I've literally coveted for years and just recently acquired at the DC Pen Show this weekend! It's only been a day but I think it could potentially become my favorite pen. Ever.

Pilot Prera (CM): This is my third Prera lol. I just think they're great and really underrated pens! Also a recent acquisition from the DC Pen Show and this cursive M nib is suuuuper fun to write with.

Pilot Vanishing Point (EF): My favorite pen for planning! Super fine-tipped for writing task lists and schedules and love that it's so convenient/quick-draw with the click mechanism.

(I'm totally a Pilot pen ho, can you tell? asdjflaglsg)

Journals/Planners/Notebooks under cut–

Sterling Ink B6 Common Planner: For a good chunk of this year, I was in this planner because I honestly love the size and all the layouts. Super practical and flexible as a system. 10/10 would go back. I've used it to plan, as a reading journal, as a tarot log...

But I get the itch to move around so it's been sitting a little unused since like June, oop.

Leuchtturm A6: I started craving something tiny and minimal so I've been bullet journaling in this pocket notebook for the last month or two and I'm really enjoying it!

Standard-sized Tomoe River Paper notebook: This is pretty consistent in that I don't change up the system itself, but I'm in and out of it for memory keeping/scrapbook journaling! It's almost always a Tomoe River paper notebook of SOME kind that I usually buy in A5 size to go to FedEx and get it cut down to standard. Though I'm thinking of getting a blank Midori MD A5 to have cut down next time - I've been liking the freedom of blank pages for journaling instead of anything lined or gridded.

I really need to catch up with it tbh, but I love sitting in an explosion of printed photos, stickers, and washi and going ham with the pages.

(I do have a flip through of my January-March 2022 pages on YouTube)

Midori MD Cotton B6 Slim: I also have this sketchbook that sorta turned into a visual sketch diary of sorts. I fell off a while ago but want to get back into it because it's super fun to work in and to look back on!

Wide-sized Cosmo Air Light notebook & A5 Filofax Malden: These are my tarot/witchy journals. Grimoires I guess? One is for journaling and all my messier notes while the other is more for reference and ease of organization.

A5 Leuchtturm: I didn't know if I should include this guy, but I've been writing it in a lot recently so I guess I will lol. This is like truuuly a miscellaneous™ notebook.

I got this A5 notebook back in 2017 to use as my very first bullet journal, then found out that this size is personally waaaay too big for me to use as a bullet journal so I hopped off of it pretty quick. It now sits on my desk because since it's mostly blank I'll just pick it up to use it to write literally A N Y T H I N G.

Most recently, I wrote like 5 pages in one night on notes for a fanfiction piece I was working on (I'm not a writer, this fic is never gonna see the light of day by anyone but me lololol. Hyperfixation is so wild; I've put 80k+ words within just 10 days into it so far and it's been hella therapeutic.)

That's all, I think!?

It's funny because I actually have a NEW notebook arriving tomorrow that I'm going to try out as a bujo/commonplace/omni journal of sorts?? I might write an update post after I've set that up and see how I like it <3

[intermundia]

I can really recommend merlin, it's great show and especially the end is supreme. In the end even the writers shiped them. "and to be fair, we did very genuinely think of the episode as a love story between two men"

hey anon? you sent this back in january, and i was like "neat, noted, not right now," not anticipating that a few months later a mutual of mine would start flooding my dashboard with merthur gifsets, sealing my fate. i decided to see if there was any good fic, and it RUINED MY LIFE. literally. why is there so much?! why is it so good?! the last few months, i have read.... thousands.... of merlin fics on ao3. i have read all my bookmarks multiple times. millions and millions of words. i'm obsessed in a way that reminds me of early days obikin. there is just Something About It, that i haven't resolved in my mind. the tragedy is so perfect and so infuriating and so satisfying. merlin and arthur's dynamic is so complex and fascinating and i can see facets of myself on both sides of it. it drives me insane because it's not fixed and settled; i only started writing obikin because i felt like i came to understand them well enough to write my own, but merthur is still Unsolved to me. i can't escape because i don't yet Understand. @merthurianity is my sideblog where i've tried to channel this energy reblogging infinite pictures of their dumb faces. it's not helping lol doubtless it's actively interfering with my writing obikin. but yes thank you im suffering and i wouldn't give it up for anything

[agoddamnbeautifulidiot]

Flicker of Hope

Epilogue Two: Madison Square Garden – Night Two

A/N:

Here is it. The final part of FOH…well unless I eventually feel like writing anything else lol. Who knows what else @harrywavycurly or anyone else might inspire from me for these two.

Note that I do play around with the timeline of Niall and Hailee’s relationship to benefit this story. Here, they only see each other from January 2018 to sometime in July 2018.

Also, we’re circling back around to death in this and there will be discussion of depression, slight unintentional ED, so bear that in mind.

Big, HUGE thanks to everyone who has read this series and spent years asking me when there would be more. You’re the real ones.

And big thanks to Niall for just being Niall. Wouldn’t have been able to write this without his beautiful music.

Alright, enough sappiness from me, here’s some more from our favorite couple. And maybe some spice. You never know with me.

-----------

You’re just coming out of the bathroom when Niall’s alarm goes off. He groans loudly and you giggle as you watch him roll over to smack his phone. The sheets are tangled in his legs and pulled taut around his hips. Flopped on his stomach, he shoves his arms under a pillow and smashes it against his face.

Smiling, you walk over to the bed, climbing on it by his feet. Crawling over him, you settle over his covered thighs and sit down. Niall grunts, turning his head just slightly. One blue eye peeks back at you and you laugh, leaning forward to press a kiss to his bare shoulder.

He hums. “Good mornin’.” His voice is rough from sleep and singing last night.

“Morning,” you say. You sit back, bouncing slightly on the tops of his thighs, making him grunt again. Grinning, you bounce one more time before climbing to the side and off of him. You move to crawl off the bed, but Niall’s hand grips the end of your robe and pulls until you fall into his side. You're laughing as you roll over and snuggle into him. “Something you wanted, my dear?” He opens his eye again, looking disgruntled with his hair tousled. His arm wraps around you, smashing your face into the pillow, making you laugh again. You run your hand over his back, scratching lightly.

Niall finally rolls more fully towards you, both eyes open. He yawns, jaw clicking with the force of it before he leans forward and nuzzles his nose against yours. You offer him a closed mouth kiss and your hand moves into his hair, attempting to smooth out the chaotic strands. “You showered.” He says, rubbing his nose on your cheek.

“I did.”

“I wanted ta shower wit ya.” He pouts and it’s ridiculous how adorable you find this man.

Massaging his scalp, you offer him another kiss. “I’m sorry, honey. I had a call this morning so I got up early to do that and then figured I’d go ahead and shower. I will remind you though, we did shower together last night.”

He just stares at you, continuing to look so adorably and sleepily disgruntled. “Is dere a rule against showerin’ together two times in a row dat I don’ know about?”

“No, you dork,” He grins when you roll your eyes. Ignoring his face, you pull away, finally managing to crawl back off the bed as he reaches for you. “I was gonna order some breakfast. You want anything?”

Niall adjusts, sitting up against the pillows, still grinning at you. Most of the covers are bunched up at the end of the bed, so he fixes the sheet until it’s mostly covering his legs. “Guess I’m lucky me alarm went off. Knowing you, you would’ve had a whole feast without me.”

“Oh my god, you’re so dramatic.” You start going through your suitcase, trying to pull a suitable option for the start of the day. “I was coming to wake you up anyways.”

“Cause you're hungry.”

“Cause I’m starving, Niall.” He laughs when you whine, pulling a sad face at him. “I’ve been up for hours and all I’ve had was a pack of airline nuts that I literally have no idea when they’re from and some really bad tea from the coffee bar.”

“Where did you find peanuts?”

You throw your robe onto the chair and pull on some shorts and a shirt. “They were in one of the side pockets on your suitcase.” When you look up at Niall, his eyebrows are raised. “What? I told you I was hungry.”

He shakes his head, tossing the sheet off his legs to get out of the bed. “Those could literally be years old, babe. Can’t remember da last time I got nuts on an airplane.” Brow furrowed, you just stare at him for a moment. He huffs out a laugh and leans over to kiss you on the forehead as he walks by. “‘M gonna jump in the shower. Order me like a full spread and some coffee, please.”

You stand there for a full minute, just thinking about those peanuts. “Gross.”

——————

It’s not the most comfortable, but you’ve somehow managed to sprawl across several floor seats as you listen to sound check. The seats are hard and there are several legs digging into your side and thigh, but you’re content to just lay there and listen to Niall and the band play.

Eyes closed, you hum along as the opening bars of “Mirrors” starts. You remember the videos you were tagged in over and over all those years ago when you’d have to leave Niall behind in Tokyo to deal with the loss of your dad. Thinking back now, it had felt like you were leaving half your soul behind. Because honestly, you had.

Other than all the nonsense with Robbie and the subsequent falling out the two of you had had, the lingering effects of your dad’s death had been the most difficult part of your relationship. Not because any part of it had come between you, but all of it had put you under so much stress and Niall had felt absolutely helpless.

The worst part of all of it had been what happened with your sister Charlie. Despite the fact that it had been what had finally reconnected you and Niall.

Your eyes are starting to blur from how long you’ve been staring at your computer screen. It’s almost dark in your apartment, which should tell you to get up, turn on a light and find something to have for dinner. But this is easier. Sitting on your couch, working. The same thing you’ve been doing for months.

It had been months since you’d spoken to Niall. Since the end of January really. Back when Tara had let it slip that the rumors about him and Hailee were true. You just couldn’t bear to reach out to him. Not that he was reaching out to you. Your text conversation had been relegated to the bottom of your messages app, something that cut at you any time you thought about it.

Your eyes flicker down to the date on your screen. 8/19/2018. Red Rocks. Niall, someone who you once called your best friend, was playing Red Rocks tomorrow and you weren’t going to be there. Groaning, you rub your hands over your face, finally leaning over to flick on the lamp on the side table. Setting your laptop to the side, you stand up and stretch, rolling your shoulders. You head into the kitchen, wondering if there’s any actual food to find.

“Pathetic,” you mutter, opening doors to barren cabinets. “You have no food, your whole body hurts and you’re thinking about a guy who probably isn’t sparing you a single thought as he has the best time of his life. Utterly pathetic.” You pull out your phone and see what you can get delivered. It’s later than you thought, but thankfully there are still a few things open in London.

Food ordered, you head back into the living room, walking around the room a few times to avoid sitting back in your chair. You’re dazedly staring out the gap in your curtains when your phone rings loudly in the silence.

“Hey, Josh,” you greet your brother in law.

Josh sighs, “Hey, kid.” He sounds tired and your brow furrows.

“Is everything ok?”

He chuckles at that, but they’re sad sounds, almost like he’s holding in tears. “No, no, everything is not ok.”

You can’t help it, you practically drop down into your chair, stomach sinking with dread. “What’s going on?”

“She did it, Y/N,” He says. “Charlie filed for divorce.”

It’s like the world stops spinning around you for a second and when it starts up again, you’re dizzy. “What the fuck? What are you talking about?”

Josh laughs again, and this time the sound is truly wet with tears. “She came home today and told me. And then she packed all of her stuff and moved out.”

“Josh.” It’s all you can say for a minute. Your brain tries to catch up with what he’s saying. “But, she…she’s been going to therapy. You’ve been going to therapy. I thought everything was getting better?”

“Yeah, I did too.” He scoffs. “I don’t know what happened. Yesterday, everything seemed ok and then today…” Be trails off and you can’t do anything but stare sadly at your worn out bunny slippers. “There’s more.”

You take in a deep breath, trying to hold in your panicked laughter. “What more could there possibly be?”

“Well, we were waiting to tell everyone, but at this point, we need to.” Josh pauses again and you can hear him breathing deeply over the line. “She’s pregnant.”

Gasping, you stand up, pacing around your coffee table. “Pregnant?! What the fuck? What…and she…Josh…” You don’t even know what to say. Everything he’s telling you is making you feel like you’re in an alternate reality.

“Yeah, and I tried to bring that up, you know? Like how are we getting divorced when we’ve got a kid on the way? But she, she doesn’t want to be with me anymore, Y/N.” His voice breaks and you feel tears coming on. “And I’m not going to make all of us miserable if we’d be happier apart.”

“What are you guys going to do?”

Josh sighs. “We’re going to figure it out. We’re having a kid and getting divorced. It’s not going to be easy, but we’re going to get through it.”

You try to think happy thoughts for him, even though you know all of this is killing him. “You’re going to be the best dad, Josh.”

That makes him chuckle, and it’s still wet with tears but you know he’s smiling. “Thanks, kid. You’re going to be the best aunt.”

The two of you talk for a few more minutes until your door buzzer goes off, signaling the arrival of your dinner. You grab your food, placing the bag on the coffee table and sitting back in your chair.

Staring at the bag, you can’t seem to force yourself to open it. Your stomach growls loudly, but you don’t even hear or feel it. Josh and Charlie breaking up and having a baby? How do you reconcile that? After everything else that’s happened this year?

Your phone lights up and you grab it to check it. It’s the notification from Niall posting on instagram and there’s something about this moment that feels like a sign. Opening up your messenger app, you scroll down and hesitate over his name for just a second before clicking the chat open and beginning to type.

Something nudged your foot and you frown, readjusting. The band has stopped playing, but you can hear them messing around from where you’re laying. You feel a shove on your foot again and you open your eyes, gasping and sitting up.

“Oh my god!” You squeal and throw yourself into your brother’s arms. “Arthur! Mom! Nate!” You hug each of them in turn. “Josh!” He hugs you tight and you both laugh when little hands try to tug you apart. Looking down, you laugh at the face your niece is making. “And is that my Lucy Goosey?” She smiles and preens, dancing in place the way only a five year old can. You lean down and scoop her up, propping her on your hip.

Lucy looks around, eyes big as she takes everything in. “Look!” She points at the stage and you nod.

“Yeah! That’s the stage.” You can see the band starting to wind down and Niall has his back to all of you as he talks with several people. “Do you know who that is?” You point at his back, giving her a chance to squint her eyes and shake her head. Leaning in, you whisper in her ear. “That’s Uncle Ni-Ni.”

Her eyes light up and she gasps and shouts. “Uncle Ni-Ni!”

On the stage, he turns and pretends to search the arena before he finds her and he jumps up and down a few times. “Luce!!” He shouts and comes running down the stage. Lucy giggles and bounces on your hip as he gets closer. “Well if it isn’t my best gal Lucy.” Niall shoots you a wink as he reaches the end of the catwalk. “Hello everyone!” He greets your family and they all respond.

Lucy continues to bounce, reaching for him on the stage. You meet his eyes and he nods as he leans down, so you walk over to the barrier and hand her to him. Once he’s got her on stage, he starts walking around, telling her all about the arena and what the show is going to be like.

“It’s just so amazing he’s playing here.” Arthur says, looking around the giant room. Him, Nate and Josh start talking about how many people can fit inside the room, looking thoughtful in a way only guys can about something you could easily google.

Your mom rolls her eyes at them, coming to put her arm around you as you watch Niall. “How you been, honey?” She asks.

Laughing, you wrap your arm around her. “Mom, we spoke two days ago. Not much has changed.” She just shrugs and smiles at you.

“Yeah but now you’re in New York and your boyfriend is playing this big arena. It’s so exciting, I just thought I’d check in.”

You eye her curiously for a moment, but she just continues to smile, turning her glance to Niall and Lucy. Glancing back and your brother and step dad, you lean into her, whispering, “Charlie didn’t want to come?”

Her smile goes a little thin as she meets your eyes and simply shakes her head. Nodding, you take a deep breath and count to five, eyes focused on the edge of the stage. Your mom tightens her arm around you. “Charlie,” she sighs. “Well, she’s still figuring it out, sweetheart. I told her it wasn’t fair to you, this silent treatment, but she’s as stubborn as they come.”

You focus back on Niall, who’s listening to Lucy babble in his ear, but is watching you intently. You paste on a smile, because all of this is for him. Niall is what matters right now. “At least she let Lucy come.”

“Oh, wild horses couldn’t have kept Lucy Goosey from her favorite Aunt and her Uncle Ni-Ni.” You laugh at that and notice the tension ease just slightly out of Niall’s body. “Now, how about we all get some lunch?”

————————

After lunch, you and Niall head back to your hotel to change and have a little bit of time to yourselves before the show.

Niall lays down on the couch immediately, shoving his hat off and just closing his eyes. You plop down in the chair, pulling off your sneakers and socks. Brow furrowed, you stare at the blank tv screen.

“Can hear ya tinkin’, love,” Niall mumbles, eyes still closed.

You’d roll your eyes if it wasn’t so endearing how well he knew you. “It’s nothing.” You murmur. Lifting his head up, Niall opens both eyes to look at you. You stare at each other for a minute and your leg starts to bounce. He refuses to relent, only lifting a brow at you. You do actually roll your eyes this time, slumping further down into the chair. “I’m just thinking about my family.”

He nods, relaxing back into the couch, still watching you. “It’s nice they’re here.”

“It is. I’m really happy they came. I just wish…”

“You just wish Charlie were here?” He guesses.

Nodding meekly, you play with the frayed edges of your shirt. “Or that she’d talk to me, you know?”

With a deep sigh, Niall pulls himself off the couch and leans on the arm of the chair, his hand rubbing soothingly on the back of your neck. “I know, love. But Charlie is gonna do her own ting and it’s honestly better that she isn’t here if she’s not ready.”

“Yeah,” You sigh, leaning your head on his hip. “It just sucks.”

“It does.” He agrees.

The two of you sit there quietly for a few more minutes. Finally, you lean back and look up at him, your hand gripping his calf. “You should go take a nap. Recharge your batteries for tonight. Can’t have a tired pop star on stage.”

He smiles at you, eyes crinkling in the way that makes your heart hurt. “You wanna nap wit me?”

“I think I’m gonna go for a walk. Grab some more coffee. I can bring you back something if you want?”

Eyeing you for a moment, he nods and leans down to kiss your forehead. “Just do me a favor, take someone wit ya, ok?” When he pulls back, his eyes are mischievous.

You chuckle, pulling away to stand up so you can step between his legs and wrap your arms around his neck. “I got lost one time, Niall James. One time!”

“One time too many for me.” He responds, hands on your back as he pulls you closer for a thorough kiss.

——————

Your walk turns into just going down to the hotel cafe. You order an iced coffee and find a cozy space to sit and just watch the city moving outside the windows. It’s probably dangerous for you to be so alone with your thoughts, but you’d rather be here than feeling like you’re bringing Niall down with your mood.

As the city bustles by, you think about the last time you and Charlie had really talked.

“Ok, but you have to give us some space here, Horan.” You say, hands on your hips in Niall’s closet. “I’m going to be here for the whole summer, I want to put my clothes away.”

Niall stands in front of a set of drawers, arms crossed. “Ya have some space babe. I gave you a whole section right dere.” He points and you scoff.

“Niall, I have three suitcases of stuff. That five inches of space is not going to be enough.”

He rolls his eyes and glares at the bags in question like they’ve offended him. “Don’t know why you brought so much stuff. Not gonna be wearing a lot this summer if I have anyting ya say about it.”

“Oh my god!” You laugh, annoyed at the smirk on his face. “Niall James, just make some more room or I’ll do it myself and I won’t be neat about it.” The two of you stare at each other for a minute before he rolls his eyes and relents.

“Fine. I’ll take some of this stuff down to a guest room for now. Still tink you brought too much.” He grabs another small section, huffing and grabbing a bit more at your pointed look before he sticks out his tongue at you and leaves the room.

Feeling triumphant, you start going through your clothes, hanging some items and folding others for the drawer he so graciously cleared out.

“What is he gonna do if we ever move in together?” You mutter to yourself. Your head whips up, just to confirm he hasn’t heard you before you continue. You and Niall had been official for almost five months, so you weren’t out here trying to put any pressure on.

You’ve just unzipped your second case when your phone rings and you grab it, answering without checking the ID and putting it on speaker. “Hello?”

“Hey sis.”

Charlie’s voice stops you cold. The two of you have had very little interaction since she’d decided to divorce Josh. Mostly on Charlie’s side as you’d done quite a bit of reaching out. From what your mom had told you, your sister was convinced pretty much everyone had taken Josh’s side in everything and there was no point in talking further on it. As if that would be the only reason you wanted to talk to her. You quickly check the date, noting you’ve still got a week before her projected due date.

“Hey,” you say, trying not to sound hesitant. “How are you?”

Charlie sighs. “Very pregnant.” You both chuckle softly at that and you’re happy you can still have a moment like that with her.

“I bet. How is my little niece to be?” You ask, quietly going back to unpacking.

“You’re so convinced it’s gonna be a girl?” She asks.

You shrug and then remember she can’t see you. “I don’t know why. I just feel like you’re baking a girl in there.” Charlie laughs a bit at that. “Niall’s convinced it’s a boy, though I’m not sure why, he just says it’s his intuition, although I’m not sure where he thinks he gets this intuition from.” Charlie doesn’t respond and you check the phone to make sure she’s still there. “Char?”

“So,” she says haughtily. “The Niall thing is still happening huh?”

It’s a good thing she can’t see you with the incredulous look you give the phone. “The Niall thing? What does that even mean?”

She groans in annoyance. “You’re still like trying to make it with him or whatever?”

“I mean I’m in a relationship with him, so I guess you can say it like that if you want.”

“Ok,” Charlie scoffs and you know your face shows your annoyance. “But how long do you really think your ‘relationship’ is actually going to last, huh?” The way she says it makes you feel gross, like this thing that is exponentially important to you is just some piece of garbage she found on the side of the road.

Several hangers click together loudly when you shove a dress on the rack. “What the fuck does that mean, Charlie? Are you like rooting for my relationship to fail?”

“I am just being realistic here, sis,” she counters and it’s your turn to scoff. “You’ve been friends how long and it took all this drama and nonsense for him to come to his senses? Be for real.”

“And you know what about my relationship, Charlie? When is the last time you actually asked me something about myself or how I’m doing?” You’re mad now, practically flinging clothes into your drawer.

“I’d say I know more than you considering I’ve been married and it didn’t take a stupid scandal and another woman for Josh to see he wanted me.”

Everything stops and you just stand there for a minute, breathing deep with your back to the phone. “An expert on marriage but you’re getting divorced?” Your tone is biting and you mean it to be. The two of you have always fought fire with fire.

She’s breathing heavily over the phone now and a small part of you worries about her stress, but you refuse to be bulldozed by her. “You don’t know shit about my life and my situation, Y/N. But have fun with your little pop star fling and when he finally decides he’s really done with you, don’t come crawling to me for sympathy.”

You don’t need to check the phone to know she’s ended the call. You stay there, staring into a messy drawer full of items you’re going to have to refold and taking deep breaths. How does every conversation with your sister go so left so quickly these days?

“Well, I see what Josh was talkin’ ‘bout,” Niall’s voice startles you and you whip around to find him leaning against the doorway, arms crossed and an annoyed look on his face.

Your hand comes up to your chest, heart racing. “God, Niall, announce yourself or something. I’m gonna have to get you a freaking bell this summer.”

He just shrugs and gives you a tight lipped smile. “Sorry, darlin’.”

Going back to the drawer, you glare at the mess you made. Suddenly, you turn and look at him. “Wait, what did you mean ‘what Josh was talking about’? When did you talk to Josh?”

“Yesterday.”

He ignores your questioning stare and you huff in annoyance turning back to your drawer. “Since when are you and Josh all buddy-buddy? What do the two of you even have to talk about?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” His reply is just sarcastic enough that it pushes you closer to the edge you know you're teetering towards. “There’s dis one person we both love dat I’m pretty sure we could bond over. I’ve also known Josh almost as long as ‘ve known you, if ya care to remember dat.”

You press your fingers over your eyes, mentally willing this petty argument away, but knowing you’re too wound up to stop. “Fine, whatever. So you and Josh talk about me and talk about Charlie and do what? Compare and contrast?”

Niall’s face twists in confusion. “What?”

“You know, comparing experiences, trying to figure out if I’m going to turn out like her.”

“Dat is not what’s happenin’.”

You’re ignoring him at this point. “If you’re that worried about it—“

He groans. “What are ya on about?”

“I can just go.” You say, fully turning back to face him. Niall looks…dumbfounded. But this, this is what’s been eating at you and Charlie’s phone call has just finally caused the word vomit. You’re shaking, desperately trying to hold everything else in, every bad thought you’ve had, all the tears you want to cry, as he just stares at you.

Finally, he takes a deep breath and steps towards you. One hand reaches out to you and you jerk slightly as he grips your hand and pulls you towards him. His other hand cups your neck, fingers brushing softly into your hair. With a shaky sigh, you lean forward and bury your face in his neck, circling your arms around him, gripping tightly. His other hand rubs the small of your back and you both relax into each other.

“I’m sorry. Fuck, I’m so sorry Niall.” You mutter into his neck, eyes squeezed tightly shut.

“I know, love. It’s alright. Gonna take some gettin’ used to, all of dis. Everyting with Charlie and Josh and being an us, ya know?” His breath ruffles your hair. “We’re not gonna do dis though. No more fightin’. Not over shit like dis. We’ll talk to each other. And, hey, look at me,” he pulls back just enough, meeting your eyes, hands on either side of your face. “You’re not goin’ anywhere. I want ya here.” You nod. “And you’ll talk to your therapist ‘bout dis, yeah?”

You giggle a bit, sniffling. “Yeah, I promise.”

Niall nods and leans forwards, lips meeting yours sweet and slow. He pulls back slightly and presses a few wet kisses into your cheek and neck before huffing. “Now, you’ve made a right proper mess of dis drawer, so let’s get dat taken care of.” His words have the desired effect and you laugh against his shoulder.

The vibration of your phone brings you back to the present and you’re shocked that you’ve been sitting in the cafe for almost two hours. Checking your notifications, you notice a few texts from Niall.

Opening them, you chuckle at the ridiculously rumpled, grumpy faced bed head selfie he’s sent you and read his message:

Pre show nap: 🤘

Waking up with no girlfriend to

cuddle: 😣

Well it’s a good thing your girlfriend

is about to be on her way upstairs to

remedy that for you

You want me to bring you a tea or

anything?

No thank you love, I’ll get one

when we leave for the show. All

I want right now is you in my

bed

Aye, aye captain

Oh babe, you know what that kind

of talk does to me 😉

💋

Niall looks up from the bed when you come through the main door, back against the headboard with his shirt off and the covers bunched at his waist. He smiles. “Der she is.”

“I am at your service, my good sir.” You say, dropping your stuff on the side table and sitting on the bed.

“Ooh, first I was captain, now I’m sir?” Niall jokes, tugging on your arm until you're straddling him. “Damn I’m a lucky guy.”

You laugh, burying your hands in his hair and mussing it further. “You really are, Horan.” He just smiles up at you, hands stroking your thighs. “We need to pack, don't we?” Niall grimaces and nods at you. With a groan, you pull away, struggling slightly as Niall tries to keep you on top of him.

“I wanted cuddles!” He whines, arms circling you, holding you tight while his head rests on your chest.

“I promise you can have all the cuddles you wanted after the show, on the bus.” Grabbing his head, you attempt to pull him up, yelping when he refuses to be moved and his teeth nip at the skin of your chest. The two of you wrestle with each other for a few moments and you’re both laughing when you finally manage to roll to the end of the bed. “Come on babe. Let’s get this done so you can go be a big superstar and play yet another sold out show at Madison Square Garden.” He continues to pout at you, and you check the time on your phone with an eye roll. “Alright,” you climb back over him. “Thirty more minutes and then we have to get up, Niall James.”

Smiling widely at you, he nods and his arms wind around you again. “Dat’s plenty of time, darlin’.” And then you’re squealing as he lifts you, shoving you back on the bed so he can crawl over you, his mouth meeting yours.

——————

There haven’t been a lot of times that you’ve been in the audience for one of Niall’s shows. Your preference has always been being backstage, but with your family here, you end up in the suite that had been set aside. It’s a good time, hanging out with Niall’s family and friends and watching them interact with yours.

Nate, Josh and Mully seem to be talking about golf and Arthur is bonding with Deo of all people which would make you nervous if your brother wasn’t so very level headed.

Your mom and Lucy are up towards the front of the suite, dancing to the music playing as the arena waits for Niall to take the stage. Checking your phone, you note that he should be coming out within the next ten minutes and you feel a little antsy not getting to be back there with him as he goes on.

Mully must sense your weirdness because he comes over, throwing his arm around your shoulders. “Ya alright love?” He asks, smiling at you.

“I am.” You say, smiling at him.

“Bet ya wish you were back der with him, huh? Instead of out here with us lot.” That makes you laugh and Mully squeezes you with a smile on his face.

“Not gonna lie,” you reply. “I do like being back there with him. But this view isn’t so bad.”

He takes a few sips of his beer, gazing out at the arena. “Yeah it really isn’t so bad, huh?” The both of you grin, sharing a moment of pride for Niall before Mully does what he does best. “But you’ll be glad once lover boy is out here, shakin’ it for ya.”

He laughs and almost spills some of his beer when you shove at it. “God, fuck off Mully.” You’re laughing and several other people in the suite are joining in, knowing whatever Mully did, he more than likely deserved your annoyance.

Finally, “The Chain” starts playing, MSG erupting in cheers as the fans know what that means. You join your mom and Lucy up towards the front and you just have to pull out your phone to film the crowd singing along as they get ready for Niall to come out.

As always, once the lights go out, it’s deafening. With a glance at Lucy, you double check that her protective headphones are in place as the opening of The Show: Live on Tour starts projecting across the curtain.

Niall is a dream on stage. The outfit choice alone is enough to get you a little worked up.

“Oh my god.”

Niall looks up, glancing at you in the mirror of his dressing room. “What’s up babe?”

You just stare at his back for a minute. “Niall…”

He turns to look at you. “What?”

“You look like a 90s heartthrob, what the fuck?”

His smirk grows and he crosses his arms over his chest and your eyes move over his arms. “Oh yeah? Am I gettin’ ya worked up over der?”

Leaning your head back, you close your eyes. “I hate you.” Niall laughs loudly.

It’s clear Niall is in a good mood again tonight. He’s a little less talkative and definitely a little less emotional than the night before. Even from up in the suite, you catch him throwing waves and winks in your direction and you know several are meant for Lucy, who waves enthusiastically back every time.

The band starts setting up for the acoustic set and Niall spends a minute talking to the crowd before they start to play. You typically know what the setlist is going to look like before the show, so you are absolutely floored when he starts playing “Paper Houses”. It’s your absolute favorite song, something he knows, and suddenly you’re just mouthing the words as you start to cry.

They’re happy tears. Grateful for how far the two of you have come. Proud of him for how far he’s come. You’re so in love with this man, it almost hurts. He’s sitting down, playing the guitar and he glances in the direction of your suite. Logically, you know there’s no way he can actually see you, but you don’t care. You blow him a kiss and lay your hand on your heart, hopeful that he just knows.

—————

It’s almost weird being back on the bus, despite the fact that you’d only spent two nights in the hotel in New York.

After the show had ended, you and your family had gone backstage and spent some time with Niall and the band. It had been a big group, family and friends for everyone just celebrating. In truth, all you’d wanted to do was get your boyfriend alone.

Finally, everyone had started to shuffle out and the band had started to make their way out to the buses. You and Niall had loaded onto yours, making your excuses about wanting to be alone, heading to the bedroom in the back. You and Niall had taken a shower together, mostly just to be close as the tour bus showers weren’t really big enough for anything too exciting.

Afterwards, you’d spent a very long time showing Niall just how proud you were of him, how much you loved him. In the end, it left both of you sweaty and shaking as you lay there. The tv was on, reruns of something neither of you were paying attention to playing with the sound off, the light flickering over both of you tangled in the sheets.

With a sigh, you adjust until you’re laying on your stomach, ear over Niall’s heart. The steady thump is soothing and you close your eyes. “You played my favorite.” You say softly, running your fingers up and down his chest.

His chest rumbles as he hums. “I did. Wanted ta surprise you.”

“Definitely a surprise.”

He shifts a bit under you, the arm behind you wrapping over your shoulders. “Ya liked it?”

You lift your head to meet his eyes. He looks so soft and rumpled and you swear it actually tugs at your heart. “I loved it.”

“Good.” He smiles and you lean down to press a kiss to his peck before you lay your head back down. The two of you lapse back into silence and Niall’s breathing slows enough that you think he’s fallen asleep. You’re slowly drifting off, body and mind content, when he squeezes at your shoulder. “Hey, you asleep?”

“Not yet.” You breathe out.

“Come ‘ere.” The two of you shift and sleepily work together until you’re further up the bed, legs tangled, your head on Niall’s upper arm as you face each other.

Reaching your hand up, you rub at his scalp and run your fingers down the side of his face. “What’s going on, honey?”

“Just wanted to look at ya.” He says softly and if you weren’t already a puddle from earlier, you’d honestly melt at the look in his eyes. “I love you, ya know dat?”

You smile at him. “I think I’ve heard it a few times.” His lips twitch up slightly. “I love you too. So much, Ni.”

His free hand caresses your waist, curling around your hip and drawing your body that much closer. The two of you lay there in silence and your eyes drift shut as you listen to him breathe. He takes a deep breath, tangling his fingers with yours.

“Marry me.”

Your eyes flutter open, meeting the startling blue of his. His gaze is resolute and you swallow against the emotions building in your chest. “Are you-?”

“Don’t ask me if ‘m sure. I’ve never been more sure of anyting in me life.” His hand leaves your hip in favor of cupping your cheek. “There is nothing more I want than to spend da rest of my life wit you. I want ta experience every good moment with you. And I want to experience every bad moment wit ya too. I want everything with you. Your name is branded all over me heart, darlin’ and I’d rather carve it out than ever be without ya.” You sniffle and Niall smiles as he wipes a few tears off your cheek. “So, Y/N, marry me?”

You smile, nodding into his arm. “Yes.”

Niall’s face lights up and he pulls you in tighter, fingers gripping your flesh hard enough to bruise, but you don’t care. “Yeah?” He asks breathlessly.

Hands on either side of his face, you lean in and kiss him, both of you gasping into each other. You pull back slightly, your nose brushing his as you smile at him.

“Yeah.”

——————

A/N: And there we have it kiddos. Flicker of Hope is officially over.

…Unless I suddenly get inspired or one of you gives me a prompt I fall in love with lol. It was never not going to end this way for me. These two were always end game.

I hope you liked it ❤️

[moononmyfloor]

My Year End C-drama Review (2023)

Last year, I did two Cdrama Wrapped posts for each half of the year. This year, I watched so much stuff right away I got arrogant and was about to do a January-February summary. And then life happened and handed me my entire ass, so here we are right back on the ground zero.

Well, not exactly. I watched lots of dramas I liked this year and would like to give nods to as many as possible, and before I start forgetting details I thought I better go ahead with the entrees that I'm sure of the answers.

My initial Cdrama reviews were inspired by anniedelavoye's this post 2 years ago, I've extrapolated a lot from there but some entrees remain same.

Part 2

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1. First drama I finished in 2023

Hi Venus. Modern workplace romcom isn't my go-to-genre, least of all if the ML is a CEO. If not for the unusual-for-the-genre setup of initial few eps and the strong recommendations of my friends, I might not have pressed play at all. And I'm so glad I did because it turned out to be one of the most refreshing takes of the genre, it was funny, the pacing nor the dialogues were ever draggy, the characters were intelligent and pleasant, and down to earth. It never leaned to the tropes of helpless/badass FL or tsundere/beta ML extremes, there was no dramatic villain arcs, down to the supporting characters everyone were so reasonable and mature and simply had the nicest time ever together. Now I put it like that, it sounds boring but trust me, it wasn't. Do give it a try. Your time won't be wasted.

.

2. An actor who took my breath away

Jing Boran as Lan Jue/Peizhi from The League of Nobleman

I mean

Look at him. Instant KO.

I remember watching this scene (and every scene that followed after, especially when he had his hair down) and being in disbelief about how he's real. He's literally glowing out the screen! His performance as a model scholarly minister, the way he conducted his glance, his steps, his speech and temperament were nothing but enchanting and... look, I can write poetry about him for ages lol.

And then I watched every single work I could find of him and ended up even more in love, because his resume was nothing but diverse. A measured scholar, a bubbling-out-of-his-skin social butterfly, a ballerina in a tutu, a man pregnant with the cutest radish monster ever, there's nothing he cannot play. I'm definitely going to check out every single work of him that'll be coming out in the future as well. Even if the plot fails, his character will surely be interesting.

(Also, I was FINALLY lured into DMBJ fandom thanks to going down his profile as well, and now I'm here to stay🤭)

.

3. Most relatable character

Bai Moxi from Gone With the Rain

She was street-smart and sassy, but never foolhardy. She wasn't a damsel nor was overly clever. She had her moments of daydreaming, but she knew what was and wasn't reasonable. She had a high sense of self-worth, she also knew when to make herself scarce. Despite being the most outgoing and energetic personality in the room, she didn't make everything to be about herself. In fact, she couldn't have been happier to be a background supporting character of the story, quietly minding her own business in her corner. In summary, she just felt very real, and exactly like how I love my FLs. Every decision she took felt like what I'd also have done in her situation. (Btw I hope noone messages me about loving Moxi but hating her sister because I don't. I think her character also made a lot of sense based on her circumstances even though she was bit more difficult to love than Moxi.)

Most of all, she was played to a tee by Zhang Nan, the young actress was allowed to shine to her true potential in this role, as she used to be quite stereotyped in either bubbly or petty mean girl roles. The drama horribly fell apart in the latter quarter (I'd like to pretend it all ended before that Great Seperation Scene), but I'm going to remember her charaacter for a long time to come.

.

4. Most inspiring character

Li Lianhua from Mysterious Lotus Casebook

The tumblr tag for MLC is already filled with Grade A+ poetry, prose and analysis dedicated to him and I'm not capable of wording it any better than them. All I can say is he really touched a vulnerable corner of my heart, and gave it strength. He's just so very admirable and represents all I ever want to be, and his entire character design and all its metaphors and philosophy especially resonate with me as a Buddhist. Like Cheng Yi said at the end of MLC concert, "At the end of the day, if you have a lotus flower in your heart that you can call your own, that's what matters."

.

5. Best Couple of the Year

Lu Zhaoxi and Ye Shilan (Zeng Shunxi and Liang Jie) in Hi Venus, Zhao Jian and Yuan Zhongxin (Zhou Yutong and Zhang Xincheng) in Young Blood 2

Here are two couples who were each others' equal match in every big, small and miscellaneous ways possible. Where their roles in their partnership did not have anything to do with society-determined gender or power dynamics, not about conforming to them nor about beating them. Everything about their relationships simply had to do with what they meant to each other their admiration, respect and love towards the other person, from beginning to end. In Hi Venus, it was never uncomfortable to watch Shilan being Zhaoxi's subordinate, for he always treated her like any good superior should in any healthy professional relationship. In Young Blood 2, Zhongxin would fully trust Zhao Jian with everyone else's and his own life, not because his head was in wishful romantic clouds but because he was 100% confident in her capabilities and would never disrespect her with "girls should be protected, you stay back and let me take the sword for you" nonsense.

I may check out like 50 dramas per year and may never come by such Het pairing dynamics in some years, yknow? I do not hate on any other kind of dynamic (plus I'd have next to nothing to watch in that case lol) but, THIS... this is so rare -for me to not be icked out by not even a single second of a fictional het couple's screentime lol- hence the gushing! (Though I know I'm not doing the greatest job of phrasing what I feel😆).

Following that note, though not a couple, honorable mentions to Chufeng (Bi Wenjun) and Robin (Zhu Zhengting) from Silence of the Monster who took Sui Yi (Sun Yihan) into their home not because they thought it'd be chivalrous to help a girl, but because it's the nice thing to do as a fellow human. For continuing onto integrating her into their world with ease and enthusiasm not because any of them had feelings for her but because they simply found her a good friend to hang out with.

Suffice to say I DIG ANY relationship where gender does not come into play, like, at all (or barely, if you must).

.

6. Best harem of the year

Orchid and Lotus harems (from League of Nobleman and Mysterious Lotus Casebook)

(Only sharing the pics of Orchid Harem because it was from the earlier quarter of this year, whereas pics of Lotus Harem will be everywhere in the Cdrama scene for quite a while to come lol)

The support group of devout puppies, zhijis, friends-with-benefits and all sorts of other polycule postions, all centered around one precious babygirl enigma of a man is just my jam, and I love it when it happens because it brings forth the fandom's most unhinged high-art. 😌😌😌

(ALSO ME AND WHO WHEN!😭)

.

7. Best ensemble of the year

Young Blood 2, I Am Nobody

For me a perfect ensemble is where the supporting characters are just or almost nearly as engaging and thoroughly written as the main leads, you'd love every second spent on any character just as much as you love that of any other. The ultimate relaxing experience where your brain doesn't have to pick favorites and you don't have to speed watch or fast forward or be antsy about who's going to appear next because you know it's gonna be enjoyable no matter whom.

And this year, it's Young Blood 2- with its Class 7 members who were all so different but all so compelling and equally contributing to the plot, complimented by the Class 8 and the unnervingly captivating villains.

And I Am Nobody- with its extensive spread of young and old heroes/antiheroes alike, all with dramatic backstories and individual charisma that were not second to another.

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8. Favorite posters/promos of the year

Mysterious Lotus Casebook, Young Blood 2, Sunshine By My Side

Really liked what MLC did with positioning the characters on various spots of the titular Lianhua Lou, the wind-sway choices for the wisps of hair and the skirts... idk the exact angles of it all were just right for each character and their vibes and appealed to me a lot.

The blending-into-painting style poster of Young Blood was so pretty too, plus these Suoyi raincoat posters.

The comic strip posters for Sunshine were also super cute, unique and perfect for the drama's themes.

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9. Best opening credit sequence

Love You Seven Times

The drama itself was a hot mess but the opening sequence was entirely worthy of being a parallelish-universe story to Love Between Fairy and Devil without a debate. IF ONLY they put the same effort to the story itself.

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10. Favorite Prop/Set designs

A League of Nobleman- Lan Jue's Tea Pavilion, Mysterious Lotus Casebook- Lotus House

I wish I could install a fixture in my home where me and my imaginary homies can chat over tea while being seductively separated by an active stream of freshwater, while my not so elegant period-style caravan is waiting outside in the yard for more cozily cramped get-together times. 🤧

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11. Favorite lighting/color grading of the year

The Forbidden Flower, My Journey to You

The former, a kaleidoscopic explosion of colors, a celebration of fleeting life, youth, summer and nostalgia. It was a daring drama on so many fronts and nailed each of them as well, and the use of colors represented its bold soul perfectly.

The latter, a marvelous combination of mountains shrouded by mist, dark-toned wood pavilions and fur-lined robes, pale, dusty makeup with rosy lips and plump cheeks; all combined together on screen to bring a palpable ambience of a secluded glamorous hideout in a dystopian world and its ethereal residents. Seriously, how I especially loved to stare at the bride candidates in their white getups, it was like the light bounced off of the fabric to shine on their faces even more, and the skin and hair looked non-oily and baby soft. And it didn't feel over the top but convincing because the camerawork and editing conjured a believable image of an upcountry with dense and dewy forests, waterfalls and rivers, there's no sun, no heat no sweat, only cold air and pregnant humidity. OF COURSE you are going to look like THAT.

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12. A drama that taught me new things

Hi Producer

The infuriating thing about Yu Zheng's show-off genre of costume dramas is that the story may be a hit-or-miss, the "historical facts" provided in them may need to be taken with a grain of salt, but they almost always provide me with great entry points to do my own research 🥲. Most niche facts that take me by surprise and things I'd never have thought to look up on my own are randomly sprinkled all over the place and I run around like a headless chicken trying to collect them all.

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13. Most exhilarating drama/scene

Three-Body

That scene in ep 5. The entire buildup to it and the resolution. The phenomenal acting bringing forth the exact emotion and exact tension required. The moment you start to understand at least a sliver of why exactly all the characters are making this much of a fuss about what's happening to them.

I cannot spoil, not even a bit. You'd have to see for yourself.

I Am Nobody

(lol Three Body and I Am Nobody. I swear that was an unintentional coincidence!)

The great V-match between certain two characters, I can't elaborate. (See the thing about exhilarating scenes is that you have to see it for yourself what's the big deal is about lol.) I really liked how both their biggest vulnerabilities and yearnings were pulled out mercilessly in public, how they both fought themselves through each other before actualizing the philosophy of what it was all about. It was beautiful to watch visually as well.

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14. A drama location I'd love to visit

Yunnan province

I've seen glimpses of the prosperous and both naturally and culturally diverse Yunnan province through Bite of China Documentaries and Dianxi Xiaoge's vlogs, the beautiful bucolic backdrop of Meet Yourself only heightened the wish to experience it all in person.

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15. A drama that was a pleasant surprise

I Am Nobody

Perfect casting job, earnest effort from everyone involved to bring out the 2D to live action in the bestest way possible, it was like a dream come true to see a genre that was previously limited into written media like comics and fanfics (modern cultivation) as a drama even if it meant labelling all the cultivators as aliens lol

It had a lil bit of a flavor of western coming-of-age/"teen gets powers and goes on an adventure in search of their origins" stories, a bit of Japanese anime presenting style and the chaotic-gaggle-of-youth-and-veterans-with-different-extreme-powers genre vibe. And then they incorporated Chinese wuxia philosophy into it and made it their own thing. I hope to see more of this in future, and definitely a season 2!

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16. An old drama I watched in 2023

Shaolin Wendao (2017)

This is one of the best period dramas I have ever seen, but I don't recommend it unless you have a strong tolerance for angst. Like, worse than Royal Nirvana and Heroes (2022) level of angst.

HOWEVER, unlike those two, Shaolin Wendao will leave you feeling rewarded for your suffering. This drama achieved a number of things that very few other have managed to do, especially for a story with such a heavy and dark premise.

The characters remained true to their selves from beginning to the end. They grew up in various ways, at the same time remained consistent. The story made sure to make all the characters aware of their individual faults and address them.

The characters were put through immense wringer but also provided viewer with the resolution they deserved. It was SO exhilarating at times, I cried. It felt like a detox, sometimes.

They prioritized telling a realistic story about the changing nature of humans. The ending was blissful but not in the idolized, wrapped-in-a-bow-tie way one would imagine. They wanted to tell a story about tribulations and letting go, and did exactly that.

It will ignite the pain but will also make sure to thoroughly quench it. So there's that.

Oh and also, respect to all the actors. All those characters were so layered and had some quite difficult scenes. I do not understand how Guo Xiaoting didn't get any good roles matching of her caliber for years after this. She was magnificent.

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More Posts by Me

[fiveredlights]

Okay I need to know things from literally ALL of the wip’s 😂

But I guess the ones that intrigue me the most are the post AUS2024 fic, the alternate Vegas 2023 story and the lmao daniel retirement fic!!

But like I said, I want to know all things lol! You are like one of my favourite authors ❤️

P.S. please feel no pressure to update, write or anything. Take your time

beth you ask and i will dutifully answer, gonna put everything under the cut because this is a long post 🫡

snippets: ausgp 2024/you're on another path

so fun fact about this one i wrote it post quali, and i had planned to post it after the race was done so i a "pre-wrote" two endings. i wasn't going to because i was gonna be like "oh max will win but something bad might happen to daniel" so i had this ready to go:

and i was sitting in the grandstand watching max's car explode in the pitlane and all i could think about was "did i do this. again" and honestly who knows.

Daniel’s already lying down face first on the bed when Max makes it back to their hotel room. He’s been doing it a lot recently after races, opening the door to their hotel room and just starfishing on the bed, unmoving until Max gently coaxes him to actually sleep. 

God, if his twenty-something year old self could see him now. 

Yeah, you’re back at the team you started with—no not HRT, that’s gone now, yes the Red Bull—not junior—sister team. The Red Bull seat? Yeah, not yours anymore, and it’s looking like it’s gonna stay that way. No, no podium at your home race, more like qualifying P18 because you were an idiot and drove over track limits. Points? Well, you had a good chance but I guess luck just wasn’t on your side yet again. 

Oh, and that young and upcoming driver from the Netherlands? Yeah, he’s your boyfriend now—surprise, you’re gay! And he’s a three time world champion, but that’s probably not important. 

Any one of those things would’ve sent Daniel into hospital, but all of those things combined? 

Early death. 

snippets: las vegas 2025/bonus fic reimagined

(i'm going to assume you mean las vegas 2025 and i'll give you both)

Max isn’t winning right now. 

He couldn’t really tell you why. 

Plenty of pundits, fans, strangers on the street have stopped him and asked him to dissect why he hasn’t won a championship in the past two years. He gives them a hastily PR trained and approved answer that seems to be more conscious in his mind now than before and cracks a well timed joke he’s sure his teammate would be proud of. 

Then Daniel comes along and will say, “Max already has three, he’s got to leave some for the rest of us!”, and the conversation will usually move on quickly after that. 

He knows that Daniel isn’t the sole reason for his non-winning ways right now, but when the eventual news of their relationship happens to drop, there’ll be dissections for days on if Daniel plays a part in Max’s performance right now. 

The last time Max hadn’t won a championship was when Daniel Ricciardo was with Red Bull, surely there’s some connection there?

snippets: las vegas 2025/don't read the last page

(Max is italics, Daniel is not.)

Max 🩵

July 31, 2025

...

I may have accidentally 

I swear it was an accident 

Like I pinky promise swear to our first born child

Don’t bring Matilda into this

Did you murder someone

What

Why is that your first thing

You are making a big deal out of it

Like bigger than the podcast you did in January

So I have to assume you murdered someone

Okay well it’s not murder but nice to know you think I’m capable of it

Daniel

I forgot to take off my wedding ring and wore it in the paddock and people saw and I got asked about in the press conference 

They definitely thought I was just engaged so I guess that’s just a silver lining

And you have a bet with Lando over when I was going to accidentally do this

Which is rude because I would never do the same to you Maxy

You literally have a bet with Fernando over if I’m going to slip up and say husband in an interview

How do you know that

And he’s Fernando you know you can’t say no to him

Daniel

When you came out you literally posted a photo of me on your Instagram

The whole paddock knows we are married

Half of them went to our wedding

About 85% of fans think we are in a relationship because you keep on teasing them with photos that is definitely me

Is it so bad that we just say yeah we’re married

We are literally about to have a kid

Okay well when you put it like that

I guess you’re right 

I know

I’m always right

snippets: lmao daniel retirement

They asked him if he wanted a big farewell thing, like they had done with Sebastian and Kimi a couple years back. 

He’d almost said no until Lando pulled a face and said “Mate, people’s last memory of you driving can’t be you heading to the pitlane again.” 

So he agreed. Told Blake to tell them to keep it minimal. No standing on giant mockups of his face during the national anthem or whatever.