#I literally only want two things one is tickets to see my partner on stage and two is a new laptop for school

[knightoflove]

Really really hoping my parents get me those tickets for Les Mis for my birthday pleaseeeeeeeeeeee

[cloud9in]

Promises (Poppy x MC) Part (2/?)

Read Part ONE (summary for fic is there)

ITS BEEN A MINUTE. @iamsimpforpoppy I hope you’re still around to read :P I love this story lol. Hope you guys do too!!!

Word Count (2.8k)

Bea and Poppy’s relationship became official a month after their initial meeting. One would say they moved quickly, too quickly. But every love story is different. This one in particular seemed to have little to none flaws, if you ignored the fact that Bea was promoted to Carter’s right hand woman in the Southside Spades.

 They did end up having that conversation after all.

 “…Are you sure Carter? I mean this is a huge deal and a special role-“

 “If I didn’t think you were capable you wouldn’t be here right now Goldilocks.”

 Carter winked and clinked his half empty beer bottle against Bea’s, who surprisingly had a nearly full bottle. He took note of the abnormality. 

 The blonde instinctively rolled her eyes at the nickname, “Okay but that name has to go. We need codenames……ooooh how about bimbo and himbo.” 

 “I’m guessing…..no, hoping I’m the himbo?!” Carter comments as he promptly tries to stop the laugh escaping from his lips.

 “Mmmmmmm, I’ll get back to you on that.”

 They share a laugh and Bea feels Carter’s gaze latch onto her in her peripherals. She could sense the shift of energy in the space between them, it almost felt uncomfortable, and that was something she never felt with Carter. “I never asked you if you were okay with such a role. If you aren't, I understand completely, I just want the best for you.”

 The blonde eyes soften at his comment and she looks at him, “never doubted that, where is this going though because you never express your feelings like a normal human being.”

 He pulls on the strings of her hoodie until it completely caves around her face, burying her whole.

 “Hey asshole!” 

 “That’s for talking too much.”

 Bea yanks her hoodie open and sticks her tongue out in a mock expression. “Oh boohoo. Poppy literally says the same thing, I don’t get it. I talk, it’s a problem. I don’t talk, it’s an even BIGGER problem. Damn a girl can’t ever exist in peace.”

 Carter places his bottle flat on the table and studies the blonde’s face. 

 She kept rambling on about her new girlfriend and the gang leader didn’t know it was possible to feel happy yet anxious at the same time. He was aware of when they entered the talking stage, went on their first date, and finally became official, because Bea told him everything. As much as the experience of being in a real relationship was new to her, Bea looked up to him and somehow she knew Carter would give her the best guidance possible. 

 It didn’t stop him from worrying. Like an older brother would. He feared the two would mix, and everyone knows that love and crime will eventually combust. He is no stranger to it.  

 “Bea.”

 “Did you know she stole one of my hoodies and actually won’t give it back?? What am I supposed to do, just take it? No she’d murder me.”

 “Jackson.”

 Her voice slowly dies down after sensing the seriousness in his tone. She takes a sip of her beer to ease the silence that sat in the air, and Carter responds shortly after.

 “You know I trust you with my life right? You’re very important to me, kid.” 

 “I know.”

 Guilt was a feeling he chose to lock away in an unbreakable box and bury six feet deep. There couldn’t be guilt in a lifestyle like this. But Bea was his only exception. And she was slowly bringing that box back up to the surface. 

 “I need you to promise me that you won’t let these two worlds collide.”

 “Carter….”

 “One of you will get hurt. And I won’t forgive myself if it’s you.”

 He leaves Bea at the table, the remnants of his comment still replaying in her head. She pulls out her phone and sees a text from Poppy on her lockscreen. 

 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- Can’t wait to see you tomorrow 😘 

 The blonde smiles unconsciously and opens the message to respond.

 I’m missing you like crazy. I have a special surprise for you.

 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- You know I highly dislike surprises, just tell me. 

 And ruin the surprise? You must be crazier than I thought. 

 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- Jackson.

 Patience babe…tomorrow it is. 

 Bea clicks her phone shut and slips it back into her pocket before downing the rest of the beer. 

***

“You know your hand on my ass only makes them stare even more Jackson?”

 Bea bites her lips and gropes the blonde’s plump backside shamelessly while slowly whispering into her ear.

 “That’s the point, princess.”

 Poppy shivers almost instantly at the boldness. “Is this the surprise you were talking about?” Bea doesn’t answer, instead trailing her hand up Poppy’s skirt. This was definitely not the time and place for such behavior but she was clearly still learning everything about her girlfriend. 

 And it definitely felt good to call her that.

 “Since when did you get so brazen? You know you’re exactly the type of person my daddy told me to stay away from.”

 Bea laughs at that statement and wraps her arm around the blonde’s waist, “yeah? And why’s that?”

 “Well I can’t ask him now, he might rough you up and that’s my job.” 

 Poppy could feel the stares of everyone burning into them, but she could only focus on the blonde cuddled up against her. The shorter girl wouldn’t call herself an attention whore, but she sure loved the PDA that Bea projected without a care. It felt nice to be genuinely admired in public rather than putting on a mask everyday. 

 But it’s safe to say that Poppy preferred all the handsy stuff to happen in private. 

 “Do you want to grab dinner with me tonight Pops?”

 “Am I picking the place?”

 “…Yes.”

 “Then yes.”

 Bea rolls her eyes at the blonde’s downright shady self but smiles nevertheless. 

 “Now don’t cancel on me out of the blue. I will not be thrilled about it.”

 “Shouldn’t I be telling you this? Your dad always has something going on in his business that somehow has to involve you too.”

 Poppy sighs and glances over at Bea, “well you know I’ll have to take over eventually. Especially since I’m legally allowed to handle deals now.”

 “I hate that word. Legal. Ugh.” 

 The shorter girl scoffs and plants her hands on her hips, “yeah I bet you do.”

***

Bea dragged open her closet in search of clothes for dinner tonight but the dinging noise of a text distracts her. 

 C-Dog🖤- Need you tonight. Something came up, meet us at the garage.

Bea wanted to thank the gods up above that she didn’t promise Poppy that she’d show up for dinner. But that wasn’t going to save her from the fury of the blonde. Good thing it can’t get worse than that, right….?

Only it was. And Poppy will probably beat her up herself, if she wasn’t dead by the next day. 

Bea’s mind and heart races as she digs her brain for a proper excuse to tell her girlfriend, but is very unsuccessful. She’s good at drug dealing though. 

 Going with the good ole truth never really hurt right?

 Baby I’m so sorry I won’t be able to make it tonight. Got held up with the gang. I know I’m an asshole, I’ll keep in touch I swear. 

 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- What else could I expect from my gang banger girlfriend 🙄 please stay safe..

 You know I always do.

 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- Do I? We need to talk about this tomorrow.

 Of course Pops.

 Other Half 💗❤️‍🔥- Call me every chance you get or I swear I’ll track you and trust me you do not want me to do that.

 Yeah she definitely doesn’t. Especially since Carter sounded frantic over the phone. The last thing Bea needed was a paranoid girlfriend, so she played it cool like always. 

 Just simple stuff baby girl, talk soon.

 ***

“…What do you mean it’s gone?! So where is it? Do you know what this means Carter??”

 The gang leader sighs frustratingly, rubbing his eyes in efforts to gain some stability. “The product was here, and now it is not. Which can only mean it was stolen. And when I find out which son of a bitch did it, they’re dead.”

 “In the meantime, we are dead”, Bea emphasizes wildly. “This is the Red Raven gang we’re talking about. If they get any inclination that we lost their drugs, they’ll kill and replace us. No mercy. None.”

The blonde paces back and forth trying not to think about buying a plane ticket to Timbuktu. 

Carter approaches Bea and plants his hands on her shoulder, “breathe Jackson. You are my partner. The leader of this gang. So get it out of your system and start being rational.”

 The blonde lets her shoulders sag as she inhales and exhales in place for a while. The minute she’s grounded she catches Carter’s gaze and her eyes light up. “List. I need a list of whoever went in the room with all of the product. We need to narrow it down.”

***

“Jackson you’re a fucking genius.”

 “It’s called having common sense but I’ll take the praise. It’s the only one I’m getting from you anyways.”

 Carter resisted the urge to pick a fight with the younger girl, because finding stolen drugs and not getting killed seemed like a much better idea. 

 Bea figured out that Henry, one of the newly recruited members of SS was a thief, or maybe just a crackhead. Same thing. He was the last to be in that room so all eyes were on him, and guns.

 “Heyyy buddy. Henry right?”

 The shorter man trembled at the sight of a gun lodged right into his mouth. “Mmmm!”

 “Oh I’m sorry, did you want to say something? Here let me just”, Bea clicks the gun which only causes the thief to panic even more. It was almost pitiful. 

 “Alright lay off the poor sucker.” 

 Bea pulls the gun out of his mouth and sits down on a stool in front of Henry with a grin. “So…where is the stash darling?” 

 He points almost immediately to a built in storage locker with a shaky finger. 

 “Ohhh well that was so easy Henry! Glad you could comply. You should tell your friends to be more like you. But…between me and you, they might already be dead”, Bea whispers that last part slowly, smirking when Henry’s lip quivers violently. 

 “Please just do it already! Why are you guys waiting?”

 Bea raised an eyebrow in surprise and glanced over at Carter who scanned the man’s face intensely. “I guess he wants to die? Talk about kinks I mean come on”

 “No.”

 Carter reaches his arm out towards Bea but never takes his eyes off Henry. The blonde watches in confusion until she realizes the thief is looking behind her, and so is Carter.

 “It’s a setup Bea, duck!”

 She dived for the ground quicker than lightning as a bullet flies through the air, leaving a trail of dust behind. Carter ducks for cover as well and starts firing rounds towards the men who snuck up on them. He managed to hit three of them but one grabs Bea by the leg and drags her against the rough concrete. 

 “Son of a- get your dirty hands off of my Dr. Martens. My girlfriend bought me these!”

 A swift kick to the face shut the blonde up real quick but she manages to recoil and send the man sprawling backwards into a row of barrels. 

 Carter guns him down and Bea finds her footing, pistol in hand and a thirst for revenge. But they never stopped coming. 

 Her and Carter were left battered and bruised, but alive. Their product was gone again though. But atleast they were alive. Carter told her that it was a theft mission primarily and neither of them were meant to die. But it only made Bea wonder who those people were.

 And why were they kept alive?

***

“Beatriz Naomi Jackson what the actual fuck?!”

 “Oh not the middle name…”

 Bea tries to avoid Poppy’s killer gaze as she surveys the damage that had been done to her girlfriend’s torso, legs, and face. 

 The strawberry blonde could barely mutter a word. Her mouth opened and closed in brief shock before collapsing next to the injured girl. 

 Bea could see the tears flowing down her rosy cheeks, which contrasted her porcelain skin. “Poppy…are you crying? I..please don’t..”

 “What do you expect me to do Bea? It kills me to see you hurt like this. Who did it? Tell me!” The blonde chokes on her own words as her hands hovers cautiously over Bea’s wounds, afraid to make her feel pain.

 “No I can’t tell you. I mean…I didn’t expect this to happen. It was a setup and we were outnumbered-“

 “We need to get you to a hospital Bea oh my god.”

 The blonde knew that she couldn’t go there. Not with the cops on the scene of the shootout, and actively looking for the people involved. Aka her and Carter. He told her to lay low and heal up, but she didn’t expect Poppy to be sitting on her bed waiting for her when she got home. The initial look on her face made Bea regret ever choosing this life. 

 She regrets it ever since being with Poppy. But it’s like a drug, once you start it’s hard to stop. 

 “I’ll call my father, he has the best doctors available and we’re gonna get your the right treatment and-“ 

 Poppy immediately cuts off, her eyebrows scrunching up until she realizes something. “Wait…what do you mean you were outnumbered Bea?” 

 Bea swallows heavily, praying that this conversation couldn’t escalate further, but that isn’t the case. 

 “Bea, answer me”

 “It..it was just me and Carter. We didn’t think there would be an ambush. We had just gone there to get goods we lost.”

 “And where is Carter? Does he know you’re like this right now? Did he leave you, I swear to god Bea if he left you…” Poppy’s voice cracks as her whole body shivers in violent waves. 

 Bea pulls her girlfriend in for a hug even though it causes every inch of her body to sting harshly. It was the comfort that she needed though. Watching Poppy breakdown over the sight of her was too much, and she began to contemplate everything. 

 “Pops listen to me, I cannot go to the hospital right now. There are cops looking for us.” The strawberry blonde stares at her until she understands the velocity of Bea’s words. 

 “Fine. But there will be a doctor that will come to treat you at my house. And you’re coming, I don’t want to hear it.” 

 Bea knew not to protest that. It was quite obvious this whole incident has left both parties distraught and she didn’t want to try and tell Poppy how to feel. 

 “Just tell me something. Are you in immediate danger? Is someone trying to harm you right now.”

 The blonde chose her words carefully. Because even after coming home beaten to a pulp, she still couldn’t tell the love of her life the full truth. 

 “No Poppy, they just wanted the drugs. They got what they wanted. I’m not in danger.”

 For now.

 “I will be okay.”

 I hope.

 “Don’t lie to me Jackson. I can’t do this if you lie. You promised me you wouldn’t get to the point where you’d have to choose between me and the gang.”

 “I know Poppy…I-“

 “You promised.”

 “And I’m going to keep that promise-“

 “Yeah the hell you are. And you’re going to promise me that you won’t ever come home like this again. You’re going to get yourself killed before we even start our life together. Our future.”

 Bea sucks in a breath which punctures her chest. She couldn’t tell if the injuries or Poppy’s words had caused that terrible ache. “Our…Wait I..”

 “I love you Jackson. I…don’t care if you think it’s too early to say that. I don’t care if I sound too cheesy for a mean girl. I love kissing you and feeling the laughter run through your body when we hug. I love being the reason you smile. I love you. And you don’t have to say it back. I just..I needed you to know-“

 “I love you too. Probably maybe from the moment I met you.”

 Poppy’s eyes seemed to glisten once again and this time there was no sadness etched into the shape. She smiled a pure smile and wrapped her arms around Bea in a tight hug. 

 She captures her lips in a searing kiss that leads to a trail of kisses down the strawberry blonde’s neck, dip of her collarbone, and chest. Bea kisses her until her chest gives out from exhaustion and pain.

 “Then you have to promise that this won’t happen again.” 

 “I promise.”

 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

NOTES: They’re gonna be fineeeee, right guys??? Graduation next chapter woooo.

Tags: @samanthadalton @somewillwin @clowneryme  @baexpoppy @poppysmc @doey-eyes8 @veenast @straightlikewetspaghetti @phoennixxsblog

[shinsorokiri]

UA Idol | Chapter One

Hitoshi Shinsou x Reader

Word Count: 2,058

Warnings: Language, big anxiety

A/N: So here’s chapter one! This is the first My Hero fic I’ve ever written and published, so I hope everyone who reads it enjoys it! Now, there’s gonna be a lot of chapters. I’m not sure how many yet, but it will be updated every week, so every Saturday (where I live) is when I will upload! There will also be a tag list, so let me know if you would like to be on it. I have a lot of ideas for this, and I hope I’m able to translate them through writing. Anyways, please enjoy!

UA Idol Masterlist

───────────────────────────────────

You anxiously picked at the number stickered onto your thigh. “Mina, I really don’t think I should be here, this is a lot,” you mumble, motioning your head to the camera crew in front of you setting up. “Oh shush, (Y/n/n). The only reason they’re interviewing us is because we’re cute and are friends and they’re hoping one of us will get through while the other doesn’t and there will be drama, and we both know that if that happens there will only be support. Although I think we’ll both get through. You especially.” You snort at her enthusiasm and shake your head. “Definitely not, but okay. Whatever you say.”

“Okay! Give us your name and where you two are from and if you have any specific reason you’re here.”

“Well, I’m Mina and I’m from Tokyo, and this is (Y/n) and she’s from (hometown). We’re actually roommates and best friends, not to brag, but I’m really here to support her! She’s amazing!”

“Literally shut up, Mina you’re better than me,” you mumble, rolling your eyes at your enthusiastic best friend. “I most definitely am not! Besides, this is a great fuck you to your ex. You know the one who told you that you would never be able to become a singer and shit on you every opportunity he got.”

“Yeah. Thank you for bringing him up.”

“Yes! Thank you for bringing him up! Could you talk about him a little more? If that’s okay?”

You stare at the producer and sigh. “Yeah. Sure, whatever. I had a boyfriend a while back who didn’t support me in my artsy ways. Since he was older, he would always make sure I knew that he thought it was a childish hobby, and that I should grow up and do something that I would actually be able to survive on. He kind of ruined my love for music, but after he broke up with me, I got it back since it was how I coped with it.”

“So, you’re here to get back at him? Show him what you’re made of?”

“Well, no... but that would be pretty dope, not gonna lie, he can go fuck himself,” you say, with a small smirk on your face. After a few more questions about your ex-boyfriend and yours and Mina’s crippling student debt, the producers wander off to someone else. “They are totally using your story for television,” Mina says, and you scoff. “They only use stories for people who they want the audience to vote for, I know how these shows work,” you say, glancing around and having your eyes land on the next poor soul the producers trapped. Looked like it was a very sleepy purple haired e-boy. Damn. He’d for sure make it through if this competition was based off of looks alone. How the hell were you supposed to compete with people who looked like that. “I don’t think I should be here, Mina,” you mumble, tearing your eyes away from him. Unbeknownst to you your gaze was replaced by his as his quick little interview ended. “What? (Y/n), stop with that! What were you just looking at that made you even think that?” Mina asks, frantically searching around. “Well the producers were-”

“Oh my god! Denki?! (Y/n), that’s one of the guys I was really good friends with when we were in high school, come on you have to meet him,” Mina cuts you off, literally dragging you over. “Mina?! Why didn’t you tell me you were gonna be here?! We have phones you know,” You watch the blonde with a black streak in his hair tackle your best friend in a hug with an unamused expression. You didn’t want to meet anyone. You were tired. The anxiety of this situation kept you up all night long. Then again, staying up all night was normal for you. At least you looked bomb though. You felt the burning sensation of someone staring at you, so naturally you turn your head in that direction. Your eyes were met with the back of the purple haired boys messy head, but no one was looking though, so you shrug it off. Probably someone just scoping out the competition or something. “Denki, this is-”

“Contestants number 14788 and 14789? Follow me please,” a producer cuts off Mina and you feel a wave of anxiety wash over you. You grip the neck of your guitar tighter than you had been gripping it before. It’s not performing that makes you nervous, it’s performing in front of the panel of world-renowned judges that makes you nervous. And try as you might you can’t hide it. “Oh, shit, sorry Denki, I’ll talk to you after, okay? See ya!”

“Break a leg, Mina,” Denki says as Mina links arms with you and pulls you along with her happy steps. “I’ll introduce him to you after we both make it, I wanna know more about his friend anyways, so he better not leave until I interrogate him,” she starts rambling and you laugh a bit. “Awww, does Mina have a crush on the purple haired boy? Pink and purple go well together, you know.”

“No, she doesn’t. She thinks that you would look great with him though.”

“No. Not happening.”

“Come on, (Y/n), you gotta put yourself out there! It’s been two whole years since he who shall not be named broke up with you, you can-”

“Mina. Drop it. Please.”

“…Okay. So, I’m going first. hopefully I come out with a golden ticket, but if I don’t don’t let that psych you out, okay? You got this you crazy talented bitch,” Mina says, trying to lighten the mood. She knows you don’t want to be in a relationship ever again after what happened with your ex, but she can’t help it. She loves playing matchmaker and she just wants you to be happy. Recently you’ve been a little sadder the usual, so she’s concerned. It was like she turned back time to when you two first moved into your apartment and you were dealing with school and your douche of an ex. She knows you find Denki’s friend attractive, he’s 100% your type and you two would look amazing as a couple. Not to mention that his friend just so happened to be staring at you at any moment you weren’t looking in his general direction. Not able to read her mind going 100 miles a minute, you just nod at her words as you come face to face with the most famous emcee there is. Hizashi Yamada. Better known as his stage name, Present Mic, PM for short. “HELLO!!! You two look amazing! You ready to become the next UA Idol or what?!” he says, way too enthusiastically. You always wondered just how loud he was in real life, and he rivals Mina. That’s saying something. “I’m totally ready!” she responds, and you laugh at PM’s face when he realizes she’s just as loud, if not louder, than him. “So, you’re both auditioning, right? Are you going together? Separate?”

“Separate, we’re just here to wait outside for moral support,” Mina responds, and he nods. “Awesome! Well, tell me your names! If you two get through to Hell Week there’s a good chance you’ll be televised, so I would like to just talk for a minute!” he says, and you both introduce yourselves again. “Amazing! I’m assuming you two are great friends, I mean you must be pretty important to each other to have it just be you two with no partners or family or anything coming. Reminds me of me and Aizawa!”

“Yeah, but we’re just best friends actually! And roommates, we moved here away from our families and we’re both single, so all we have is each other,” Mina says, pulling you into a quick little squeeze. Present Mic screams something about how adorable that was before wishing Mina luck and sending her in. Shockingly, you’re both quiet as you hear her audition begin, and unsurprisingly, she flawlessly hits all the notes in Lady Marmalade. Her voice isn’t only loud when she talks, after all. PM’s eyes go big as he points at the door, looking at you and mouthing “She’s really good!” You just grin and nod. This isn’t news to you. After hearing her blast Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey all the time and belting out their runs and matching their high notes for about three years, it’s not shocking to you how great she can sing this song. Eventually, her singing stops, and PM waits a minute or two before he begins talking again, not necessarily quiet, but quieter than before. “I did not expect that kind of soul to come out of that little body of hers!”

“Yeah, she can be unpredictable like that... now imagine living with her,” you mumble, half kidding and half serious, but he laughs at that. Loudly. Not even a moment later, Mina walks through the doors and violently shakes the ticket in her hand at you. “I DID IT! I DID IT, KICK ASS, TAKE NAMES, AND MAKE SURE YOU COME TO HELL WEEK WITH ME SO YOU’RE NOT ALONE AT THE APARTMENT FOR A WHOLE WEEK!”

“I won’t be alone; Nyx will be there she is great company.”

“(Y/n), she is a black cat.”

“She is our third roommate and you will treat her as such,” you point your finger at her before PM gives you the clear to go in the room. “Make sure to hit your mark! That’s the tape shaped like a T on the floor! Break a leg,” he says, giving you two thumbs up. You nervously make your way through the short hallway, eventually landing right smack in the middle of the room. You make sure to hit the mark, as PM instructed, and you need to tell yourself to calm down as you look at four of the most influential people in music. In front of you sat Shouta Aizawa, Keigo Takami, Nemuri Kayama, and Toshinori Yagi.

Better known as just Aizawa, a well-known singer-songwriter. He stays behind the scenes mostly, and the rumor is he’s written over 20,000 songs for himself as well as other artists. The majority of course go to other artists, as he isn’t a big fan of all the fame and things, but the few albums he’s put out have some of your favorite songs ever written. He’s genuinely someone you’ve been looking up to for years upon years.

Then there’s Keigo Takami, who is known as Hawks. He chose his stage name because he’s always admired the strength and freedom of hawks and he decided that he wanted to be the same way. And he is, he literally can do everything. Every song of his sounds different, varying from rock to country. A lot of people really support his country music considering he calls his fans his chickadees. People just think it fits. The genre he seems to gravitate toward the most is definitely more of a rock vibe, even having his own band. And yes, the band’s emblem is a pair of red wings.

Next to him is Nemuri Kayama, or Midnight. She’s a world-famous popstar, but she makes sure to include some soul sounding belts in every single one of her songs. She’s Mina’s literal idol, and the amount of times you’ve had to listen to Midnight’s songs? So many. So many times. Not that you were complaining, her voice is amazing. You just wished she didn’t sing about love and sex all the fucking time.

And finally, there’s Toshinori Yagi. People tend to shorten his name to Nori, but he’s the most famous judge here. Not only does he own the All Might Record Label, he has won 11 Grammys, his music is played everywhere all the time, and he manages some of the biggest stars today. Unlike his rival record company, Endeavor Records, it’s said that Toshinori is ridiculously nice as well as a little strange, but in comparison to Enji Todoroki? The nicest man to walk the planet. 100%. Not to mention he’s also a singer himself. His songs are instant smashes, and everyone loves his voice. Even if he isn’t mean, he’s so ridiculously powerful in the business.

To say you were intimidated was an understatement.

[maknaesdancersrappers]

[2 / 2] You feel butterflies when you see them, especially if they touch you.

read [1 / 2 ] first here

After the whole picture taking process (plus retaking them after remembering the absence of a corsage and boutonniere your mothers had stored in the fridge to keep them fresh,) your mom drops the two of you off at prom.

He takes care of your tickets at the registration booth and you’re lowkey enjoying all the swooning looks he’s getting as he politely smiles at everyone who greets him or passes by.

“Are you confessing?” You nearly screamed at how Joohyun crept up behind you like that.

“Jeez, you look great, too.” You scowl, “And can you please get off my back about confessing? It’s not happening - at least tonight.”

She sighs, “Fine, but at least slow dance with him? There are good songs on the playlist for it. You two look amazing, by the way, have fun tonight.”

Jaehyun returns by your side just as Joohyun leaves, “Let’s head in?”

You’re amazed at how the prom committee was able to transform the gym into a whole new place. There were silk curtains covering all the posters and slogans of the school, draped along the walls from the center where a disco ball hangs with fairy light weaved into them and bouquets of flowers perched on the hoops to hide them. The whole court had been carpeted which would be a bitch to clean out if anybody spills anything on, but it made walking in high heels easier.

You and Jaehyun find your table with your friends already seated.

“Ah, the couple of the table.” Mingyu exclaims, bringing the attention towards you and you knew it was best not to deny his teases because it’ll only get worse.

Aside from you, Minkyung was the only female at the table and she looked so happy to see you. Jaehyun helps you to your seat before occupying the last one.

“I’m so glad you’re here. I absolutely hate Yebin for bailing out on us.” She whines, pulling you closer, “I suddenly wish I had a date.”

“You could have chosen anyone here, sis.” Mingyu gestures to the other boys seated but Minkyung flips him off.

“If I had a date, maybe I wouldn’t have been on the same table as you. I’m only here for [Y/N] and Jungwoo.”

Before the twins could start fighting, you distract her by complimenting her dress. “Kyung, you look beautiful. I’m sure the other dress couldn’t compare to this one.”

Up until last night, Minkyung couldn’t decide between two drastically different dresses—but the fiery red mermaid gown she had complimented her dyed black hair beautifully. “I’m beautiful? Have you seen yourself? You’re fucking gorgeous, [Y/N]! Has Taeyong seen you yet?”

“Taeyong? Why are you asking? I haven’t seen him.”

She rolls her eyes, “[Y/N], he paid 300 to get a date with you for a reason.”

“He didn’t have to pay for a date, I would have considered if he just asked.”

“Maybe if you weren’t surrounded by giants,” She leaned forward, across your seat to glare at Jaehyun, pressing you back on your chair, “He wouldn’t be so intimidated.”

He laughs, “In defense of said giant surrounding [Y/N], I’m not always with her.”

You motion for her to move back to her own space, “Besides, who finds him intimidating?”

Minkyung looks at you like you had said something incredibly stupid, “You know what, whatever. Just try and find Taeyong, if he offers to dance with you, then do it. Get to know him a little before he avails that date.”

You passively agree even though you didn’t have any intention of doing so, grabbing the water filled wine glass in front of you to take a sip from.

“That’s not fair!” Mingyu interjects, “Jaehyun didn’t get a pre-date with Jangmi.”

His sister gives him a sarcastic smile, “Well, he could have if he wanted to, but he didn’t. Either way, dear brother of mine, it’s all up to [Y/N].”

Jungwoo clears his throat, never liking any hostility between the siblings and derailed the topic to something about the interior. Luckily for him, the twins take the bait and entertained him, even dragging the other two boys, Sicheng and Seokmin, into the conversation. That left you to your thoughts while Jaehyun looked around, mindlessly nodding at what your friends were saying.

He was uncharacteristically silent as he bobs his head to the soft music. If you really knew him, you’d know he’s nervous - but for what reason?

You know your mom told you to have fun, but Jaehyun is making it really hard - was he looking for Jangmi? The thought makes you feel sick and that fact makes you hate yourself; you have no reason to be jealous because you’re just his best friend and at this point, you don’t want to confess which basically means you don’t want to be anything more than friends.

The program starts and everyone’s attention is directed to the center of the makeshift dance floor where Doyoung (of course) introduces the school principal for the opening remarks. Every word uttered through the mic and speakers surrounding the room went into one ear and out the other, your mind is absolutely blank as you stare down at your hands on your lap. You only snap out of it when a large hand comes from the side and holds yours, but you don’t even dare look at him.

“Are you okay?”

There they are again; the butterflies winding up their wings before they take flight in the confines of your stomach as they sense Jaehyun’s presence in their territory. “Yeah,” You shrug him off, “It’s nothing, don’t worry.”

After he pulls his hand away, you feel cold suddenly. You compose yourself and remind yourself about your mother’s words; have fun tonight.

So you will.

As the night goes on with the food served and multiple performances happening, you were able to loosen up; mostly because Minkyung and Jungwoo kept your mind off of Jaehyun. You’re suddenly thankful that he wasn’t actually your date so you’re not obligated to interact with him, and either way, he and Mingyu are talking about something that’s making laugh - and that was good.

“We’re free to dance on the floor right? Should we?” Jungwoo eyes the empty dance floor as a band plays on the stage.

“No.” You automatically respond, earning a look of judgement from Minkyung.

“Yes!” She exclaims, grabbing both you and Jungwoo before dragging you out of your seats with a gleeful giggle.

You tried to grab on to Jaehyun for help, but your hand merely grazed his shoulder as you’re literally whisked away. At the dance floor, other people have jumped into the idea of dancing already and in no time, it was filled with dancing students; bouncing on their feet at the lively music. You did promise to have fun, so a little dancing wouldn’t hurt.

A little while later, the rest of your table joins the three of you and your little dance circle moves around each other for a few songs; you’re all laughing and you’re genuinely enjoying yourself. Eventually, the group slowly disperses; either finding other friends to dance with or taking a break and like always, you end up alone with Jaehyun.

“Are you feeling any better?” He leans down to your ear and tries to speak over the loud music.

“Ye-”

You’re cut off by the music dying and Joohyun’s voice coming through the speakers: “I think it’s time to slow things down. So everybody grab a partner, couples or friends,” You can sense her shooting you eyebrow raises as she says this, “and enjoy the the first slow dance of the evening.”

As the music picks back up with a soft piano intro, you watch everyone around you pair up and when you turn around, Jaehyun is looking at you with equal surprise.

His ears are tinged pink as he offers you a shrug, “Do you wanna sit this one out?”

“I-” In the corner of your eyes, you see Miyoung and Sora with their dates close off the possible exit routes you could have taken and you wanted to flip them off while they inconspicuously smile at you like they were innocent. “Don’t think we can leave even if we tried.”

He glance around and nods, “Yeah, I guess you’re right. So,” he holds out his hand to you.

You take it after a quiet sigh and immediately at the touch, the butterflies are at it again. You step closer to him and place your other hand on his shoulder while his goes to your back, just below where your skin is exposed. You wished you weren’t wearing heels because now you’re practically eye to eye with him.

He’s unusually quiet again; he’s just leading you to the slow beat of the song and looking away, only meeting your eyes when you faced him.

You’ve always known about the darker brown specs in his eyes, but why does it look different now?

“[Y/N], your eyes are blown out. Are you really okay?” He quietly asks, his brows just furrowing together in the middle.

“I…” For a moment, you consider confessing and it felt so easy to say the words; they were sitting right at the tip of your tongue.

I’m in love with you.

“[Y/N]?”

A heavy sigh leaves your lips rather than the words you thought of. “It’s… the heels. They just hurt now.”

“Oh.” He says as if it suddenly made sense, “Then let’s get you seated, yeah?”

You motionlessly agreed, allowing him to guide you through the crowd with your hands interlocked until you’re back at your table and he’s sitting you down. Jungwoo and Sicheng are there, chowing down on the excess desserts the buffet had.

Jaehyun glances to the side and you follow his sight; it was Jangmi, watching the crowd while the couple she was with were clearly flirting with one another.

You lick your lips, “You should… ask her to dance.”

He looks back at you, confused, “You’ll be okay here? You don’t want me to get you ice or something?”

This makes you snort, “My feet hurt, yeah, but I don’t I’m actually sprained. I’ll be up and dancing in a bit. Jangmi just looks like she needs to be saved.”

And she really does; being an unintentional third wheel to a completely oblivious, flirty couple must suck,

“Alright. I’ll be back.”

You watch him go off and make his way over to Jangmi, offering his hand to her. She says something that makes him laugh and your chest starts to constrict when they walk over to the dance floor to look for a place to dance. You wanted to tear your eyes away from them, but it was too late because you caught them smiling and your head is coming up with all the possible dialogues they can be talking about.

He wasn’t smiling when you two were dancing.

Abruptly, you stand up and turn to leave, but Sicheng asks you where you’re going.

“Restroom.” You answer, pushing your seat back under the table and walking away.

The hallway was colder than the gym when you stepped past the doors, taking only a second to breathe in before heading towards the restrooms. But when you reach the door with the ladies’ placard on it, you hesitate. Instead, you strode towards the exit and shivered the moment you opened the doors. You’re bound to get sick, except the cold night was way better than the gym that felt too congested.

Before you walk down the steps, you bend down to remove your heels and moan at the relief your feet cried out. You pace down the steps without knowing where to go or what to do. The music in the gym is so loud, you could still hear and identify the song from where you stood. As you stroll along the side of the building; barefoot and your heels in hand, you hug yourself when a breeze passes by.

You can’t help but wonder, with the song playing back to something more upbeat, if they were still dancing together. It does hurt to see them together, but a large part of you doesn’t regret suggesting it. You’re starting to think it’s better Jaehyun ends up with her because it’ll be easier for you to get over him or at least push them aside long enough to forget your feelings.

“[Y/N]?” A voice calls out and you turn to see Taeyong walk over to you. He just had some slacks and a button down on with a shiny pair of black shoes. “What are you doing out here?”

“Fresh air… what are you doing out here?”

He shrugs his shoulders, “Fresh air. You seem like you have a lot on your mind.”

“I guess you could say that… Prom isn’t as fun as I thought it was.”

“That’s why I didn’t want to go.” Taeyong scoffs, throwing his head back and you watch his hair move accordingly to his actions. “But mom said it was a once in a lifetime so,”

“Funny, that’s what my mom said, too.” You assess his features; Taeyong was incredibly handsome, compared to Jaehyun, he had sharper and defined features, “Hey, why did you… try and win the auction?”

“Why not? You sound like cool girl. We never had classes together so I got curious about you and wanted to meet you.”

“You could have easily approached me instead of paying hundreds for some date.”

He whistles, “Well, if you didn’t have a guard dog, I would have.”

“Guard do- Jaehyun’s not a guard dog.”

“Prince charming, then?” You can’t miss the sad glint in Taeyong’s eyes. When you try to deny, he cuts you off, “Whatever it is then, it makes it really hard to approach you.”

“He’s just protective - he always is… since we were young. He’s probably not aware he’s doing it.” You chuckle, hugging yourself tighter when another breeze picks up and sends shivers down your back.

“I’d offer you a jacket, but,” Taeyong gestures to his body and you nod.

“No, it’s fine.”

He hums, “I might have a sweater in my locker actually. It won’t match your outfit, but at least you’ll be warm, right? Let me go get it.”

“You don’t have to.” You say just before another breeze and your teeth literally chattered, “Okay, fine, I greatly appreciate it - but, I don’t really wanna go inside yet.”

“You sure? Then I’ll be quick.” He promises, jogging past you and towards the doors.

Without even a minute passing by, something soft comes over your shoulders. “That was fast-” You turn and almost gasped. “Jaehyun?”

He was standing there with the same concerned look etched onto his face and it took you awhile to realize he wasn’t wearing his coat anymore and had it draped on your shoulders. “Taeyong told me you were out here.”

“Oh.”

Jaehyun sighs, sounding fairly disappointed, “You’re clearly not okay, [Y/N]. I know I can’t force you to tell me what it is, but I’m here if you need anything.”

“I know,” You mumble, “I know you’ll be there. You always are… I guess I’m just having an off night. Probably almost my time of the month.” You try to cover your lie with a laugh. “It’s nothing.”

“Well,” He frowns, “Do you wanna go home?”

“I’ll go home, you should stay. I don’t wanna ruin your prom experience all because I got moody.” You start to remove his coat off of you but he stops you.

“I’m not going back in there and party knowing you’re not okay.” He argues, “How many times do I have to tell you that it’s you over anything.”

“I’ll print it out and hang it over my bed or have it tattooed one day!” You didn’t mean to snap at him, regretting your tone after seeing him flinch, “You can’t and won’t always choose me over anything. I-I’m sorry for snapping at you. I can’t think straight inside for some reason. Let me go home alone, Jae, I already ruined your prom experience for not even making it through a damn song-”

“Is that why you stormed out? You think you ruined my first slow dance or something?” Jaehyun grabs your hand and waist, “That’s easy to remedy. You’re not wearing your heels anymore.”

You blink up at him, “Here? Seriously?”

“No one’s around and we can still hear the music inside.” Of course the song playing is another slow dance song. “So?”

Maybe you could salvage the night, accepting his offer and pretend for a few minutes that everything is okay. His touch is nice and warm, perfect against the cold air that had been brutal over your skin. You lean in further until your cheek is on his shoulder and close your eyes.

“I don’t deserve you.”

“What makes you say that?”

“You’re always… looking after me, taking care of me… you deal with my moody and bitchy ass and all my sarcasm- I… I don’t get how you do it.”

He pulls away from you when he hears your voice crack, wiping a tear from your eye before it ruined your makeup. “[Y/N]... I love you.”

It felt like time stopped for you; it’s so dead silent outside aside from the bass thumping from the gym that you couldn’t have possibly misheard him. This couldn’t be a confession from him.

Time resumes and Jaehyun continues, “You’re my best friend. All that you mentioned is as easy as breathing to me. That’s why I keep telling you ‘you over anything’ because… I can’t be happy if you aren’t.”

Your heart drops, of course it’s too good to be true. “I’m not happy if you aren’t either.”

Jaehyun gives you a soft, easy smile and you return it, pretending it had the same meaning as his. And it seems that’s what you’ll be doing for awhile - pretend your heart isn’t shattered as he gives you a brief hug and take your heels from you, pretend you don’t want to hold his hand when he covers your own, and pretend that you never had feelings from him from the start as he takes you home.

the fourteenth sign

[fanstanfiction]

act one- josh dun imagine

author’s note: hey guys! this will be a part one to a little story idea that i came up with. this is an imagine for all my theatre kids out there! i got inspiration from the play Almost, Maine and it is such an AMAZING show!! anyways i think this is pretty cute, so enjoy! part two will be coming out soon :)) this contains 1.9k words

the cast list is up after school today and you’re so excited to see if you made it in the show. the bell rings and you run from math class to check the list. your eyes look in 1,000 places on the paper scrambling to look for your name.... and you see it. you got in the show, you smiled so big and started screaming with your friends. you go back to the list to see who else made the cast and to see who your scene partner is. josh dun... the name sounds so familiar but you could put a finger on it. 

the next day was the first rehearsal for the show and you were in the best mood for the rest of the day. the bell rings and you walk to the theatre room to see the cast and director. you put your stuff down and look to find your water bottle, pencil, and highlighter. you get your things and meet in the theatre where the read through would happen. you sit in the front row along with your friends and wait til the director starts rehearsal. there were only a few people you’ve never seen before but you would somehow end up being friends with them before the show was over. “hello everyone and welcome to our first read through!” the director exclaims. “we are going to go around and introduce ourselves and then we’ll dive right into the script. introduce yourself and then give us fun fact about you, go!” we all go around in a circle introducing ourselves until we get to a boy who you’ve never seen before but looks so familiar. “hi, my name is josh. i play in a band whenever i’m not here playing for you guys or band.” it all clicked as soon as he introduced himself. josh plays the drums for the theatre department during the musical season. you remember that you and your friends have a nickname for him and it got all around the department. you called him “cue boy” because he would always miss his cue to start drumming since he was distracted by the actors. he pulled his act together during the actual show since he didn’t want to mess it up for us.

 everyone is done introducing themselves and we go right into the script. “can everyone sit next to their scene partners so you all can start to get to know each other and the characters better?” the director says. we all mumbled a response and the director tells what scene to sit where in the theatre. josh and i awkwardly sat next to each other and i said a quick “hi” so he wouldn’t be uncomfortable. he responded with a warm smile that kind of melted your heart. “why don’t we go through our scene and then we’ll talk about our characters and ourselves at the end?” he says. “yes of course!” you said. you read the stage directions and try to visualize the set, the characters, and the context of the scene.  it was called, “Seeing The Thing” it was all about one guy who likes this girl and try to confess his love to her through a homemade painting. you and josh read through it and laughed at some of the lines and got awkward when the lines were really serious. you guys get closer to the end of scene to realize that you guys have to kiss a lot. 

DAVE: You know what? Do me a favor. Try given me a kiss and see what happens. And I’m not gonna make fun of you or nothin’ bad like that, I promise... 

RHONDA: No... No... Let’s do the... this: Is it apples? Cherries? Big open faced strawberry rhubarb pie- 

It says in the stage directions that they kiss, like for a long time. how is this school appropriate? you and josh finish reading your scene and discussing both characters. josh starts to say quietly, “hey do you-“ 

“all right, rehearsal is done! see you all tomorrow at 3!” the director says. everyone in the room burst with clapping and screams of excitement. everyone started to gather their things when josh starts to speak again. “hey... do you want to hangout sometime after school so we can get to know each other better?” he said in a very nervous tone. “yeah, i would like that.” you said with a smile. 

it was the next day and you were so excited about rehearsal as always. you enter the theatre with excitement and see that most of the cast was there already. the director takes attendance quickly so they can start blocking the scenes. “alright, we’re going to start with the top of the show. while you are waiting, go over your scene with your partner and have some chill time.” since you and josh were the second to last scene, there was a good chance that the director wouldn’t be able to do the blocking for your scene today. you two worked on your scene for about 30 until the stage manager came up to you guys. “ok, so we don’t need you guys today since we’re not even done with the first scene.” “okay, thank you!” you wait for the stage manager to leave before you say anything else. “well that sucks, but at least it’s friday. we can finally get a break!” you say quietly so only josh can hear you. “yeah.” josh says softly. “i have a show tonight... if you wanna come, i have an extra ticket.” he says with a nervous look on his face. “of course i’ll come! what time should i show up?” you say with excitement. “actually i was wondering if you want to come with me to the venue right now.” josh really wanted you to go, you could just tell. even though you haven’t known each other for too long, you wanted to get closer to him. “oh really?! sure!” you said. josh smiled so big and he ran to go get his stuff from the theatre classroom. you follow him and he was bursting with energy. you two grabbed your stuff and ran to josh’s car. you threw your stuff in there and took off. 

the venue was about 30 minutes away from the school and you two talked about music and concerts, you two have the same taste in music. “so, what kind of music does your band play?” “uh... i don’t know. we really don’t have a definite style. it’s up to the listeners own interpretation really.” josh says. “ooooo how edgy.” you say in a sarcastic tone. “i’m so excited about the show tonight! my band mate tyler said that there will be over 100 people which is the largest show we’ve ever played.” josh said with a big smile. “oh wow that’s so cool!! does he know i’m coming to the show?” “yeah, he’s excited about you showing up. he’s been wanting me to reach out to more people, i’m just glad you wanted to go.” josh said. the rest of the car ride was filled with crazy band stories that made you laugh, you really enjoyed josh’s company. you both arrive at the venue and walked through the front doors. there was a guy who was about the same age as josh. “hey what’s up man? y/n, this is tyler!” tyler was about the same height, if not shorter than josh. you couldn’t tell if he went to your school or not. you two said hi and walked into the venue together. you were given a backstage pass... you were not expecting this. “a backstage pass? josh, you know i would have been just fine with having a ticket.” you said. “i know, but i wanted to show you what it’s like in my world.” josh says as he stares straight into your eyes. “we should probably set up. do you want to organize the merchandise?” 

hours of organizing the merch and backstage areas was a hassle, but you do this all the time in theatre so it wasn’t out of the ordinary. the doors opened and you watched the fans run in. they must have some dedicated fans. a few moments later, someone touches your shoulder and you flinch... it was josh. “oh my gosh you scared the shit out of me.” you say breathless. “oh, sorry. i wanted to grab you so you can chill backstage, i know you’ve been working hard.” josh grabs your hand and leads you backstage, thank god their fans don’t notice. once you get to the backstage area, you see tyler and another girl. “y/n, this is tyler’s girlfriend jenna!” you exchange a hello with her. “we’ll we gotta go, bye.” josh says nervously. you end up in josh’s dressing room. it was super nice, way nicer than you ever expected. you help him organize his masks and clothes for the show. he told you everything behind the masks and you were shocked. eventually he had to get changed and he didn’t mind you being in the room because he just took his shirt off right in front of you. your jaw dropped and you couldn’t stop staring. “pull it together!” you say to yourself. “hey can you grab me that shirt over there?” josh said. he was just teasing you at this point because he was trying to get you to stare at his body and say something. you got up and handing him his shirt and proceeded to get this situation out of your mind. he got dressed while you were practicing some of your lines for the show. “god, don’t you ever get a break from theatre?” he says. “not unless if i want to be doing this for the rest of my life. theatre is more of a lifestyle at this point.” you say. “you know, i wish everyone could sit back and just relax.” josh says with a hopeful tone. “you should tell that to yourself, you literally play the drums all the time. passion is passion and you have to be working every minute of your life in order to achieve your dreams. but, the final performance is all that matters. now, i want you to go out there and perform your heart out. bring out the inner theatre kid and perform for your fans, i’ll be there to cheer you on. you’re gonna kill it tonight!” you say. josh gives you a big hug and just kind of holds you. all the sudden, someone knocks on the door. “hey josh, we’re on in 5!” you turn around to see tyler ready to go. “i’ll be out soon.” josh responds softly. tyler walks away before josh can say anything else. “can you stand on my side of the stage? i really want you to get the backstage treatment.” josh says. “yes, of course! as long as you show me, then i’ll be there.” 

it was showtime and you walk with josh to the stage, you do a theatre ritual before he goes out on stage. you watch him take the stage with tyler and let’s say they put the best show on for everyone in the crowd. rehearsal will never be the same after this concert. 

[ryanmeft]

Ranking the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Part 1

The culmination of the superhero ride that started with Iron Man back in 2008 is almost here. Avengers: Endgame tickets are selling out fast even though the movie is nearly three weeks away, and speculation as to how this stage of Marvel’s box office juggernaut will all end is at a fever pitch. What better time to rank the movies that have brought us here? Now, no one with even a tiny bit of objectivity sincerely believes Marvel had a ten year plan and executed it precisely according to a grand vision. Looking back through these movies makes it clearer than ever that, more often than not, they made it up as they went along. In fact, considering all the retcons, changed minds, dropped plot threads and unexpected surprises, it’s amazing the continuity holds together at all. It mostly does...but the bottom part of this list contains the few movies even Marvel’s PR team probably wishes they could have a mulligan on, as well as some good-but-not-quite-lighting-the-world-on-fire fare. Let’s get to it. Warning: this article contains spoilers for nearly every movie in the MCU.

21. Iron Man 2

The red-headed stepchild of the MCU. After the surprise success of the original Iron Man, Marvel Studios apparently forgot that the strength of that film was allowing Jon Favreau and the writing team to put heart before brand synergy, and decided to make a movie that was half marketing for their planned Avengers crossover. Dropping Black Widow in here felt completely jarring, and it didn’t help that her role just added to the jumble of plot threads that didn’t seem to add up to anything; at the time, many saw it as proof that Marvel was putting a little too much faith in their ability to pull off this whole crossover thing. That’s only part of the sordid story, though, because the movie is also a mess in nearly every other way. Rather than the tight plotting of the original, this one sees Tony, Rhodey, Pepper and the rest speeding from random situation to random situation---a car race, an unhinged party, a spy caper---with only the barest of plot threads holding it all together. The movie’s only saving graces are the villains played by Sam Rockwell and Mickey Rourke. Each of them deliciously devours every scene they are in, providing the film’s lone moments of enjoyment, but they’re also squandered on what feels like an extremely low stakes plan. Iron Man so well proved that superhero movies can have a soul that it even managed to make some critical best-of lists for 2008. The sequel made us wonder if that might have been a tad premature.

20. The Incredible Hulk

There are some genuinely creative moments in this action-oriented “apology” for the in-reality-pretty-good Ang Lee Hulk movie. The opening sequence showing how Hulk’s blood travels, a chase through a Brazilian favela, tossing Bruce out of a helicopter to incite his other half, and the almost-love scene aborted by the alter ego were signs of how clever the movie could have been if it were not focused on cramming in as much smashing as possible. Nick Nolte’s complex antagonist is replaced with William Hurt chewing a little too much scenery, the new super-villain played by Tim Roth is a dull waste of the actor’s talent, the finale is listless, and the entire movie is just one long excuse to show Hulk ‘roiding out as much as possible. The camera work of skilled action veteran Peter Menzies Jr. and some excellent CG on the title character make it more fun to look at than many of the tights flicks of the time, which is something. As a general rule, things that are made to chase fleeting audience sentiments don’t stand the test of time, and there’s been a quiet reversal since 2008 in which Lee’s more original and creative vision for the character has come to be re-evaluated, while this one has been almost forgotten and relegated to endless TNT re-runs. Maybe with Mark Ruffalo having one more movie on his contract, he’ll get a crack at doing it right post-Endgame.

19. Thor: The Dark World At the time, this movie served as iron-clad proof that the only reason the Thor character worked at all was Loki. The god of mischief is at his delicious then-best here, conniving from a prison cell, partnering with his brother out of genuine concern, and eventually managing to actually take the throne. Sure, that latter development was quickly undone in the next film, but what a parting shot. He’s the only aspect of the movie that fully works, and if you pop it in today you sit patiently waiting for his scenes and snoring through the second, Loki-free half of the movie. Thor himself is lifeless when Loki’s not on screen. The Warriors Three are still nowhere near the right balance of humor and bravery. Natalie Portman remains wasted on a supposedly genius scientist who can nevertheless be stunned into immediate silence by Thor’s golden locks, while Sif is still 100% unnecessary in every way. Perhaps worst of all, the underrated Christopher Eccleston is miscast as a villain who always seems to be doing bad Shakespeare. We all tried hard to forgive it at the time (and director Alan Taylor claims it was made “a different movie” in the editing room, not at all implausible) but thankfully we’ve since admitted this is mostly a misfire.

18. Ant-Man

If you were to judge Ant-Man entirely by the size-changing shenanigans, it would be one of the best Marvel movies. Peyton Reed, building off a script by departing director Edgar Wright and Joe Cornish (and tidied up by Rudd and Adam McKay) gets a ton of mileage out of the novelty of being the size of an insect, from outrunning a flood in a bathtub to that rather brilliant final confrontation in a child’s playroom, using toys as ammo. Further, Paul “I Am Immortal” Rudd is pitch-perfect in the title role, while Michael Douglas and Evangeline Lilly bring a lot to the picture. It’s in the details where Ant-Man falls a bit short (pun intended). To start, we have a single major Hispanic character in the MCU, played by the frankly more-legendary-than-you-think Michael Pena, and he’s reduced to a fast-talking stereotype. Judy Greer and Bobby Cannavale are also worlds better than their roles, which are, respectively, a cliche shrewish ex-wife and a cliche over-suspicious cop. What really drags things down, though, is the lackluster villain, who may be the most inert black hole in the MCU’s rogues gallery. He is neither good enough to engage us, nor bad enough to hate. He could have been played by a grip, for all the personality he’s allowed. The core of the film is delightful. The hill around it is crumbly.

17. Captain Marvel

Marvel’s first female-led flick is understandably a phenomenon, pulling down the sixth-largest opening weekend of all time and serving as inspiration to young girls and target to the kind of people who don’t want women in their clubhouse. So what about the movie that’s causing all this hullabaloo? It’s pretty decent. The movie can be summed up very succinctly as “safe”. It takes few chances and is more like one small step than one giant leap for womankind. Had it been released during the early superhero boom, it would still be fondly remembered as a major link in the genre’s evolution. As it is, it borrows from the buddy-cop subgenre to create what is essentially an adventure/sci-fi movie between Carol Danvers and Nick Fury. It stands out more as a callback to the kind of action pics made in the 90’s (when it is set) than the heavily marketed shared universe of the MCU, and includes standout performances from Annette Bening, Jude Law and Ben Mendelsohn. It meets expectations; it does not exceed them, and if you are a fan of the distinctive style practiced by directors Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck, you won’t find it here. It’s only a month old, and it may be too soon to definitely say how it will be seen as time goes on. Right now, it feels more like a solid first step for the character than a fully realized final destination.

16. Thor

The original Thor has some completely solid, indisputable charms. Chris Hemsworth does physical comedy much more skillfully than he is ever given credit for, it is the debut of Tom Hiddleston as Loki, the third act is a rare-at-the-time case of inventiveness in an MCU finale, and it’s always great to see Stellan Skarsgard in literally anything. I would watch two hours of Stellan Skarsgard eating lunch, with a clone of Stellan Skarsgard. His drinking scene with Thor is a seriously underrated bit of awesome. It helps make up for the fact that the movie has no idea what to do with most of the supporting cast, including in part Loki, who at this stage seems to flail around between personalities, having crazy forced on him in time for the final duel despite it not even being hinted at earlier. It’s as if director Kenneth Branagh just let him do his own thing, and Hiddleston’s not 100% sure what that should be yet. The mirror scene is objectively amazing, but he won’t really come into his own until Avengers. The Warriors Three are utterly wasted; Branaugh and the writers just never nail the right combo of comedy and camaraderie needed to pull them off. Sif is superfluous. Natalie Portman is one of the finest actors of our generation, here reduced to goggling over Thor’s pecs. It’s not bad, especially compared to some of the dreck that gets pumped out of the blockbuster machine. It’s just rather inert.

That’s it for part 1. I’m  going to be doing some Marvel/Superhero/General Nerd content leading up to Endgame’s release. Check back next Friday for part 2 of this list, and pop by Monday for part 1 of my predictions on the fate of each character in Endgame. Part 2: https://ryanmeft.tumblr.com/post/184208179827/ranking-the-marvel-cinematic-universe-part-2 Part 3: https://ryanmeft.tumblr.com/post/184372777282/ranking-the-marvel-cinematic-universe-part-3

[zelos-official-armrest]

Seoul Limited and Forever with Babyz (Madrid)

I’m about half a year late, but I just want to share a bit of my B.A.P concert experiences both in Seoul Limited and Forever With Babyz tour in Madrid. You know, if anyone’s interested…

First of all, how did I get to Seoul? I applied for a month-long summer university program and I got a smaller tuition fee thanks to my schools being partner universities. Still, it took me about 5 years to get enough funds. I’m not going to talk much about that in here, but it was the most amazing time of my life. I do advise everyone not to ONLY go there for running after a potential Korean boyfriend tho. The culture is so much more than kpop-related fantasies.

Ok, on to the actual topic- B.A.P. While in Seoul, I did want to see the TS building with my own two eyes (so I’d know where to go to throw the tomatoes, haha). Therefore, one evening me and my fellow coursemate/ friend went to look for it, but apparently that day B.A.P and TRCNG had a practice there as it came out. When we approached the building, Zelo was chatting with someone in front of the house, but seeing us coming scared him off and he fleed to the building. I felt so sorry for him, because it must be a common occurrence for them to not get privacy even there by the way he reacted. So, I got nervous because I really wanted to have a picture in front of the building, but I didn’t want to be causing any discomfort to them. Me and my friend decided to take a picture real quick and I kinda got my two half-blurry pictures in front of the building.

Here’s potato me making TS surrender to the Matoki power:

When we stood back a bit, I saw TRCNG entering the house and we decided to leave. While we were walking away, around the corner came Himchan who was, for some reason, followed (basically cornered) by a bunch of blonde chicks (stalkers I guess?). Since I was a bit too close, for some reason I thought it would be really impolite if I didn’t say anything so I bowed and let out „annyeonghaseyo“ (It’s really weird to type it out like that). He answered me with a nod and when he had entered TS, some Korean fans who were following set themselves to wait outside the doors. That was the last we saw them as we moved further away from the place…

Before going to the summer program and buying the plane tickets to Korea, I didn’t know B.A.P would have a concert. When it was announced, I praed for the dates to overlap with my stay. I was incredibly lucky, because B.A.P’s first Seoul Limited concert was on the last day of my stay. The day itself was super-hot (38+ degrees) and I had a lot of troubles from moving out the dorms with all of my luggage etc. In the morning I managed to go to the venue to buy some merch (got myself a matoki whistle and a t-shirt). In the afternoon, there were already fansites distributing free merch (got also 2 banners, but I lost my shiny Zelo banner at the concert T_T). 

The queueing was so different from European stops, where we camp in front of the venes. Here you had a number on a ticket and you just went and looked for your spot in the line and everything went smoothly. I actually had bought two tickets, because I was hoping for someone to go with me (and to get more people to appreciate B.A.P, lol). I did manage to get a friend from the program to come with me, so it was a success. The venue was really well ventilated and the sound system was great. B.A.P had a live band to back them up and they put on a great show as always. Too bad I couldn’t really understand much when they did their talking. In the crowd, there was a couple and B.A.P pointed at them and stated that „This is how you take your girlfriend out. You take her to a B.A.P concert !“, and they continued to chat for a bit. The best things from the concert- Coma rock version, Blind and small snipets from songs fans had selected as the ones they want to hear from B.A.P the most, watergun fight, new solos and tons of adlibs. Even though my ticket queue number was quite big, the stage was so well built that when idols came off from the main stage to those cat-walks, I had maybe only 2 rows of people in front of me making it the closest I’ve been at a concert. 

This is basically how I saw them went they came near:

But there is one thing I found different from previous concerts. I don’t know if it was because I was really nervous about my flights and everything that day, but the crowd in Europe felt more passionate. I guess it is just in the way we cheer. I mean, their fanchants and everything was on point, but somehow it felt more calm and collected that I was used to. Either way, I loved that I could be there with OT6 and that Jongup released his cute MV for Annoying as a memory of that day. Oh, oh, and I finally got on Himchan’s fancam J. Really blurry, but I know it’s me. Thank you Channie!

Moving on to my Madrid experience. At first, I didn’t really plan to go to another tour because I’d already seen them this year, but the fact that there were tickets with best perks I never really managed to get before still available started creeping on me. I had to decide whether to wait for the mess that was Berlin ticket sale or settle for the Madrid one. I decided to save myself from the excess stress and take the Madrid VVIP. I don’t regret going one bit even though the Youngbros organisation was freaking awful. As VVIP holders, we were promised more time at the high-touch than VIP but nothing like that happened. The signed poster was actually just printed on and they had ran out of black beanies before even half the VVIPs could pass the counter.

Just a small look at the merch etc: 

The worst thing was that they messed with B.A.P’s sound system so some time the microphones didn’t really work and the security guys didn’t pay any attention to people fainting in the crowd, which Daehyun and Zelo had to point out to them (Zelo tried to get their attention in Spanish, Daehyun wanted to stop the song to resolve the case) and Jongup threw his own water bottle to fans in need. The concert itself was really good (even though we still missed Bang and were chanting his name from time to time). I loved being able to hear Howler in it’s Spanish home and Zelo went wild with the butt-slaps and butt-wiggles. During Do What I Feel, he threw his towel to the crowd and guess who was the lucky one to catch it!  It still has his makeup on tho :D.

Haha, towel-kun has seen some things... At this point I knew. For 5 years, I didn’t manage to choose a bias in B.A.P. That was the day my bias chose me (lolololol)

The only kind of OK clips that I got from the concert was Youngjae’s acapella “I’m happy” and Jongup’s “Try my luck”, because I was trying to enjoy the concert too much which resulted in my hands being extra shaky. 

There was also a lottery where they chose a random number and a fan for every member got a small canvas bag with member’s drawing and autograph on it. And a hug. At some point, Youngjae managed to hurt his shoulder, I hope he is ok now. Them teaching us the fanchant for All the way up was pretty memorable since they almost booed Daehyun off the stage because he couldn’t contain himself and do the right thing. And Zelo just went like “OMG, it’s our song”. We also had a support project for Himchan where we held his banners and chanted his name.

My high-touch experience. While we were standing in a line, the organisers started to let B.A.P take their positions near the wall. To get there, B.A.P walked through a small bordered area which was right next to where some of us were queueing. I noticed Himchan and told him “annyeong” for which he raised his head, looked at me and just had the cutest smile ever on his face. I made Himchan smile, everyone! I don’t know if he noticed that this is the one person who never manages to greet him correctly (me in Warsaw, Seoul and now Madrid). He was also first in line at high-touch and he was still so extra smiley at me. 

To sum up the high-touch experience, this is basically it:

B.A.P with their beautiful hands vs Me coming from a jungle

And then this 1 second you had to admire all the beauty

I mean, there were so many things I wanted to say (just one sentence to each member), but I couldn’t do anything because it was too fast. I tried to tell them stuff in English or Korean, but they tried to tell me stuff in Spanish and in English and it was honestly such a mess. It was so funny. Then right after we had the group photo so I fastened my steps and got next to Zelo. After everything I just had to go to him. I could tell he did something over my head while taking the picture since he was touching it, but I had no actual idea what. The picture turned out better than I expected. I am not really good friends with cameras, specially when I don’t even know, where the cameraman is or when the picture is exactly taken. Got the cutest photo ever and I will now officially present my short ass as “Zelo’s armrest” since this is what he used me as.

Tbh, I had to photoshop my face on the picture a bit, because the camera reflected on me so bad that I looked like a Christmas tree in a Colgate commercial. Literally.

Anyways, after the short time for pictures, I could pass by all of them again and thanked them, especially Zelo, when I turned around. I love them all so much and I had soft hours for days after we got to know that Zelo shouldn’t have even been on the tour but he insisted to come. Made it all 10 times more memorable and important.

I wish I could also go to Yongguk’s tour. I don’t know if it’s possible, because I have already emptied my bank account for them. So I guess we’ll see what happens. I hope he receives a lot of love and support anyways.

That’s it, folks!

[zpetra]

ROI in Malaga 2018 Journal

To be able to tell the whole story of how I actually got to go to ROI, we have to go back a little to May. I was sitting home due to a public holiday and somehow a promo popped up on Instagram about ROI and I just checked out the dates / information. For the end of the year I had some holidays planned at least in days. No exact details yet as in October I wanted to see a concert (didn’t get tickets but went for a small Spain trip - Barcelona, Seville, Madrid) and the fact about GP assignments was still in the air. 

For some reason I just checked the dates and settled on the 17th of November in Malaga. I had one of those “fuck it” moments and bought my ticket. Got a flight for a good price, hotel stay for a night close to the stadium was also quickly found. So in a mere few hours of planning, it was settled.

I would see Javier Fernandez in Malaga. I was excited and so happy about it.

Fast-forward a little bit to GP assignments as I have to mention it. When it was known Yuzuru Hanyu would be going to Helsinki and Moscow I was in a slight dilemma as ROI was the same weekend as that. Unfortunately any other date or location was impossible for me regarding ROI, as I had other plans. I aimed for Helsinki (which we know happened and my journal about it can be found 1 - 2 - 3 here). In the end I am also happy that I wasn’t in Russia... it was hard enough already. I stayed with my plan and bookings for Malaga and I have no regrets in that case.

Saturday - 17th of November

Saturday morning I set off to the airport bright (cold) and early as public transportation sucks for me at the moment and I have to take quite some detours. Anyhow I arrived, got myself some hot chocolate with coffee...only to hear the news falling in. While I am not happy to mention Yuzuru in this Journal, it was part of my weekend and it influenced my overall mood as well. So please forgive me for doing the bad thing and speaking about Javi but for this particular case for me they were intertwined with each other.

Start my day with a delayed flight while my arrival time was already conflicting with the free skate and given the info before my flight about Yuzu fall my anxiety was peaking. Lufthansa sucks with arriving on time especially in Spain it seems and we barely landed and I got out of the plane when it was Yuzus turn. I didn’t even had the time to process I am in Malaga and going to see Javi in a few hours. I watched in the middle of the airport, not even making it to my friend on time who was waiting for me near the exit. It was probably the worst 4 minutes of my life... I do not want to go into detail but it was hard. Once the scores were calculated I hurried to my friend so we can watch the rest together and wait for the final results. Happiness flooded me that Yuzuru won regardless of a not so perfect skate but impressive for a completely changed layout and obvious struggle... little did we know.

We found our bus to the city and we joked about the whole thing, giddy and happy. Nearly missing our bus-stop to the hotel XD but someone wanted to get off at the same station and my fried spotted the hotel, so we managed to do some involuntarily sightseeing. We got to our hotel, checked in and said to meet after a quick shower... I barely got out when the information flooded my Twitter. Yuzuru Hanyu is injured, he skated on painkillers. All my happiness was gone and it was difficult for me because in about 5 hours I was meant to participate in one of the most amazing shows of my life but I felt gloomy.

Cue us going to Burger King and stuffing ourselves with junk food, unable to talk about anything else. I felt so guilty, still do because none of our moods were really in for Revolution on Ice and that was wrong. So damn wrong. Javi deserved better from us, not us thinking of Yuzu or me going on a rant about this but it is the truth. I have failed him in that sense. I am sorry.

Somehow we fixed ourselves enough to leave and after some confusion at the venue we found our seats, or knew were to go. Spent some time together until it was best to take our seats. My friend and I, we didn’t sit together so yeah. I had a second row seat on the long side. 

I WAS SO CLOSE!

Revolution on Ice - the show

There was a bit of a delay with the start due to people not getting to their places on time and waiting, which I found really nice of the organization to do as others would just start and not care. One issue I had was that literally everything was said in Spanish and “No abla espanol” here, or very little...so I was struggling. XD

I will get this out there right from the start... I found it a bit weird that during any kind of group number, Plush was never part of it, he had his two individual performances and joined the finale once the performance itself was finished, only fooling around on the ice happened. Additionally I had a feeling that at the end he kind of took the spotlight from Javier, maybe because the audience knew him better but in that sense I felt a lack of appreciation for Javier, both from the audience and maybe a bit of Plush, lingering center ice while Javier already retreated. Maybe it was also because Javier himself left the others have their moment of shine, I will never know but somewhat I felt Plush was hyped more and I didn’t like that considering it was Javiers show. The overall impression left me a bit negative in that sense.

Anyway back to the beginning... I had my seat in the second row, quite in the middle of the long side, opposite to the where the DJ was. The seat was incredible and luckily someone short sat in front of me and I could actually see XD. YAY.

There was a really nice opening with most cast to start with the show, I really like it as everyone had their individual moment to shine as well as skate in choreo together. I truly appreciated too that generally most of the songs were Spanish, barely anything else, I think overall 4 songs were in English? And some jamming music at the end but rest was Spanish. We also had the live performance of Eva Ruiz ( 2 songs, one with the synchronous group and one with Yuka Sato ), we had also Diana Navarro who had two songs as well, one was with the Annette Dyrty/Jannick Bonheur the other with Anna Cappelini/Luca Lanotte. Diana sings amazing, I swear to god it sounded like playback music and it wasn’t. During Anna/Luca performance I didn’t even realize she was on the small stage on my left because it sounded like playback music. She is good. I really enjoyed it. And the performances matched the music as well. Anna is gorgeous, I saw her so close and she is beautiful. I think I will just make comments for everyone I saw otherwise I get confused and I am not that good at recalling what happened after each other LOL.

Evgeni Plushenko: He had two performances, one song I didn’t recognize actually, I was also happy not to see Nijinsky due to what happened a few hours before and I probably wouldn’t have been able to watch it and Sex Bomb... God, was it awkward for me. He literally did push-ups in that muscle suit in front of my eyes, I have it on video and god, I was red as a tomato, unsure if I should watch or not, be embarrassed or whatever. I think I had some mix of it with hysterical laughter. Still it was nice XD

Elladj Balde: He is incredible. The way he hyped up everyone and he had a performance with the DJ, kind of a sound battle, it was really good and his back-flip is to die for. I may have, managed to catch one of them on camera and wow. He also had kind of a flamenco?ish duet with Jeffrey and was part of all group numbers. I really really enjoyed his performances and he is damn handsome too XD Elladj is a true entertainer and I can really see why the Japanese shows tend to have him, he puts the place on fire with his performance and aura.

Jeffrey Buttle: He had one serious performance where I was a bit irritated by his facial expressions but otherwise he is incredible, his spins are to die for and a back-counter 3A may have slayed me too. As I said he had a duet kind of thing with Elladj before Javi joined them to take over with his bullfighter program, nice crossover tbh, they kind of teased and mock fought each other. Loved it. I certainly could see bits and peaces he had shown Yuzu in the programs he choreographed and it was somewhat bittersweet but incredibly lovely. Jeff looks also really good and that (peach) is to die for XD. I am sorry but I can’t help it when they literally skate in front of me with their backside, he also wore rather tight suit pants during one performance.

Anna Cappelini/Luca Lanotte: They had I believe one Spanish song with Diana Navarro, don’t know the title but it was really emotional and while I did not understand the lyrics I could still see what they tried to convey with the way they skated. Definitely enjoyed their lifts. They also did a Chaplin program with the girl group, later got joined by Javi who took over the ice to perform himself with the group, the way they incorporated the flow over to a different program was great. There was barely any awkward pause. As I said Anna is gorgeous, all of them were and damn, I couldn’t stop staring, especially what make up she used... anyone? Insider? Please? I need that ice-shadow she had one while they did the black for guys, red for girls group choreo. XD Overall, these two are incredible. 

Annette Dyrty/Jannick Bonheur: Okay, these two? If you all remember at FAOI how one pair skater swung around their partner and Yuzu said “Yabai” THAT WAS MY OVERALL MOOD. They did the scariest but most incredible things I didn’t know existed ( or were allowed, I guess with show skating it is ), they fired up the crowd! I swear they got one of the loudest cheers out there that night and for reasons. I was so impressed by them, really. Overall - wow factor.

Celia Benayas/Marco Covela: The acrobatic duo was great too, they performed to Never Enough from the Greatest Showman and it gave me Pyeongchang feels and oh god... I was close to cry. They were really good! Good addition, different than they had nothing to do with the skating.

Yuka Sato: HOW DO I NOT KNOW OF HER? SHE IS SO PRETTY AND GRACEFUL! She didn’t have many jumps in her performances but had some beautiful spins and spirals and I really enjoyed it, she was also as everyone else basically in the cast ridiculously pretty. She could rival with her beauty about anyone under 30 and she is 45!!! Can I have her genes? She performed to two Spanish songs, one with Eva Ruiz and also was part of all group numbers.

And we arrived to the main of the whole show for me - Javier Fernandez

For each of his greetings / announcing him in the beginning and taking over the ice he slid from the back in the front, silently without disturbing the attention from those currently bowing or still performing, unless it was meant to him doing so. He joined Anna/Luca on the ice to perform a Chaplin program, which was really entertaining and got lifted at the end by the girl group - as we have seen pictures of it XD Truly performances where he can play a character suit him a lot.

During Chaplin he was going all out on the dorky and I loved it, one time he laid on the ice and the girls skated above him, then he rolled on his side like he was showing off, even the way he got up was comical. So fun!

Next he did the bullfighter which was really funny too, he did one part right in front of me and his expressions are to die for. Of course it is also one of his more funnier ones in my opinion and the costume is gorgeous, the amount of detail is crazy.

I am not sure during which number anymore but he actually messed a 3S, A SALCHOW!! JAVI!!! I know you gave your 4S to Yuzu as a parting gift but OMG. And it happened on my side of the ice too like a bit further to the right, still in full view XD I have felt that Javi gave room for others to get some spotlight as well, which is so typical Javi in my eyes, still he could have basked in the attention a bit more, he deserved it and I am happy the crowd was so interactive too and gave it to him!

Now onto the one performance I truly, truly wanted to see and actually was the reason why I bought a ticket to ROI

Prometo

I am actually listening to the song as I am writing this...and I will start with a bit backstory here. As we all, I myself have seen a fancam of Prometo during the Shows he did in Canada and I instantly fell in love. I had to search for the song and ended up buying the whole album of Pablo Alboran listening to all the songs for weeks... the impact it had on me was I can’t describe it with words. Sometimes you are just so drawn to something at the first tunes, you will always remember it. I remember where I sat and how I found out about Prometo, the amount of hours I have listened to it on repeat, searched for the lyrics, backstory... everything I could get my hands on. It is a true masterpiece and not just the song itself but the program too.

There are actually 3 different versions of the song and he is using the Amazon Music, live version which is much slower than even the piano version. As for the versions I prefer the original or piano version, on the other hand I understand why he used the third version. It just fits so much more.

I have seen people calling it bland because Javier is not wearing any flashy costume but just simple pants and a sweater but if you look at the lyrics it does make sense and I think he sells it. The beige fits the melancholy it should show and how he does some movements to fit the text, like “dancing in the salon” and he kind of does a tango. I appreciate the lack of big jumps, beautiful spins instead and just single ones or more like leaping through the air, the knee slides and that one gorgeous Ina Bauer (he did that right in front of me and I was dead). It drew some tears from me, both for how the song generally gets me emotional but also due the whole afternoon already. This year literally two performances made me cry and this was one of them. I am so happy I could record it to keep with me forever.

I posted it on my Instagram in pieces, if you want to watch - HERE. I have also a Story Highlight for ROI only.

I found the audience in this particular instance annoying as some people kept screaming “Vamos” in between, I am sorry but Prometo is not something where it fits and I felt it disturbed the magic it was casting on everyone. Oh well, I concentrated on Javi instead, singling along a little bit.

I think by now after this long paragraph you can tell I am in love with Prometo and I am so thankful for being granted the privilege to watch it. It’s a beauty.

After that basically the finale was on and we had a happy Javi shimmy around the ice the music in the Prometo outfit. It was so nice to see him this happy, dancing around, giving people more time to shine as they introduced everyone again. Javier looked so happy and I was too. 

ROI is an incredible show and if you have the possibility just go, you are not going to regret it. I know the cast is different from some locations but I was so happy to have seen these performances. And the fact he nearly sold out a 11K stadium in Spain is so amazing too! Javier deserves this, truly.

I have no pictures or videos in this post as I have mostly taken videos and I have them in the insta stories or not yet really posted it. Some are quite short. I think I have only really filmed Javis programs in full and the opening. Oh and the acrobats. The rest just bits and pieces for memory.

After the show - 18th November - Sunday

Feeling so much better about my day thanks to Javi and the cast we returned late to our hotel. I chatted with my best friend for a bit before settling for bed. I slept really bad, waking up every hour and being confused about where I am, the time and it was a long night. I promised my friend to leave with her to the airport tho her plane left a few hours before mine but really I had nothing better to do and it was raining cats and dogs. Sightseeing got cancelled. At the airport the gloomy mood returned though I tried my best to be more positive, waiting for the medal ceremony which I could watch before my own flight went off. My friend left and I stayed alone at the airport. Did some shopping to lift my mood but otherwise sat at the Starbucks.

The moment the medal ceremony started I probably had the lowest moment of my entire weekend. I was sporting a headache due to the weather being horrible, my irritation level was high, been fighting the emotional situation... The moment I saw Yuzu with crutches I cried. I cried in a public coffee at an airport after one of the best evenings of my entire year (along with Helsinki weekend).  I just... it was hard and still is, will be for a while and yet again I felt bad because Javi should have been my priority for this weekend. I am sorry... again and again.

Once I fixed myself emotionally, I had to go to the gate. Cue Lufthansa being their usual self... delay with the flight, roller-coaster ride included in the price and when we landed and finally could get off the plane. I was more irritated than ever, my whole head was throbbing. Had to wait 20 minutes for a fucking train to take me to the city but yet again due to blocked routes, follow it up with a solid 20 minute walk in the cold ass weather. I barely get home and am in front of my building a guy starts to hit on me after I helped him with the same issue I had - public transportation. God, I was so not having it but trying to stay polite. When I rejected him he tried to pull the “is it because I am black” card and I was like... OMG REALLY? You wanna pull that shit just because someone you just met and is literally standing at the door of her building refuses to give you her number or expect yours? You are a fucking stranger I just met and I am sorry but hell no. Somehow I managed to actually get into my apartment and I was done. I was done with the whole day and the weekend and just nope.

While I did have one of the best weekends of my entire life it was also one of the worst ones. Even now I am conflicted how I feel. One moment I am happy the next I am sad and I really don’t know. Regardless of it all there is one thing I will say:

Javier Fernandez, thank you for organizing ROI and thank you for giving us the privilege to enjoy your skating, putting on a show that left me shaking and crying (literally... Prometo was emotional for me). Thank you, truly. The whole show and cast, including you were incredible. Gracias. See you next at Europeans! ♥

[mcfrey]

something I wrote about BigHit on my phone at 2am to try and organise my thoughts that nobody asked for or has to agree with, but I just thought some people might find interesting to think about (it seems over dramatic with the layout but I swear that's just how I punctuate stuff in my phone sorry)

it finally happened

and by that I mean I'm gonna talk about something that's been bugging me

SO ANYWAYS

yeah

it's bighit

I felt it with answer not having all the songs on. they only left 2 songs and skits off of HYYH so like... to leave what was it like 6 songs off of answer?

sea, pied piper, paradise, love maze, 134340

okay that's the only 5 I could think of but it still applies

and it's like they chose those ones so that people have to buy all 3

I know I'm biased because those were literally my favourite ones and im still salty but

it feels like they chose to put in the ones with American producers and writers over prioritising fan favourites?

bighit

WYD

then came

burn the stage the movie

which didnt really bug me

lowkey just made me really happy but also really sad

although to have a YouTube series and a movie??? like I get that it costs a lot to make but if felt a bit weird

I got over it once I saw it though

but I still feel like their money making is hardly subtle

someone mentioned how bighit effectively make money off of overworking the boys through things like burn the stage and that's the upsetting truth. it raises awareness for what they do, but then they'll just have more fans so there will be more pressure and it will just get worse

okay wait part 2 should have been bon voyage

like yeah it's cute but breaks that are semi scripted with cameras in your bedroom shouldn't be classed as breaks

and then we watch it

we purchase it

it works

so they do it again

sometimes you get things which are meaningful out of those videos like when they were on the boat

or when they read letters on run

but are they actually meaningful? probably, but not compared to what happens off camera because

that's all we see

we dont know what goes on the rest of the time

how many actually genuinely meaningful moments there have or havent been

it's hardly news that we're not really a part of bts' story as individuals. not truly. so why fake it? why not embrace what it is?

next we have LY in Seoul screenings

kind of chill because not everyone gets to see the tour, plus even if there was a DVD it would be region locked

and it's just a nice chance to see them on a bigger screen and meet other armies so I cant really complain. nobody's making me go and for some people it's a really good thing.

but also kind of not chill because renting it on YouTube would be like 3£ and a cinema ticket is like 15£

*edit: and to do it when the tour is still going on feels strange to me? someone pointed out that some people couldn't go because it spoils it

and bighit push all this stuff about the boys overworking which we already know and feel guilty about but then they overlap this with their schedule when it makes so much more sense to promote and release this at a time when they're either on a break or working in the shadows so that we can get prerecorded content whilst they're resting*

bt21

cute and wholesome, but the collaborations with everything?

wait, this can apply to just bts themselves too

here's the thing, bighit, you may profit a lot from all these things but at the end of the day it's the partner who wins because people buy things they never wouldve thought to buy before bts' face was on it because that's just how consumerism works. bts are under your contract and by accepting every single deal presented to you one could argue that you are in fact damaging their image by contradicting the message of their music. we know that the members arent sincere in their promoting without even having to ask them. there is nothing spiteful about it. the members arent in the wrong or trying to deceive us. they're just doing their jobs. the problem is that people support bts because of their music, lyrics, and speeches which are all, just to name a few, anti capitalist, anti consumerist, and anti racist, and you make money off of them because they show those traits, and it's because it's all clearly sincere.

but you also make money off of them through their advertising campaigns with luxury products, fast fashion designs, and uninclusive makeup lines.

you cannot show two sides of BTS to the world without making one of them emotionally worthless.

and if I were you, I would not for a second risk losing the quality and sincerity of the message in bts' music that got you where you are today.

what makes it hurt more is that bts are still so passionate.

they make songs and remixes in their own time.

why arent they incorporated into the discography? why is the discography simultaneously over saturated and lacking? rushed yet milked?

their performances are still so strong, but they collapse at the end

is it really worth it in your eyes? why cant they simply perform less and better? is their hardworking image being abused for further popularity, exhibiting their sleep deprivation like its part of what attracts people to them?

and this stadium tour

now this is different

because it's not bad at the moment, just confusing

what I think it means is that bighit wasnt brave enough to try for stadiums the first time, then realised their mistake when every arena sold out in minutes or even seconds?

or worse, he knew they would sell out and wanted them to so that the show could be labelled as Sold Out

which is fair enough, and clever

but it's also really not

like there are hundreds of thousands of people missing out on the tour who want to give you their money but the venues were too small or there were too few dates

or you avoided their state, country or continent altogether

and now you could argue you're fixing that by going back with a larger capacity and giving them a chance but why with 9 days notice?

look I get that nothing can be perfect but this has just been piling up recently and I think it's the deals and tours that bothered me most

dont get me wrong, I'm much madder at the way *edit: i put a company name here* capitalizes and could probably be even more mad if I actually learnt about it rather than just using instinct (get it it's funny)

and I'm even more mad at *edit: I put a different company name here* for their poor management and neglect of what people actually want

but bighit really have bts

The BTS

and that gives them so many choices

yet they seem to make some really irrational ones

and now its 2:39am

and we'll end it on that beautiful negative note

*edit: please dont hesitate to let me know what you think about this or if you think it's just going to stir up something and I should take it down

and thanks for sitting through this whole thing*

[jeongjaehyuns]

ok since kellie posted her fancam i thought i’d finally stop being lazy and do the same too :’)

i mentioned this a little bit before but earlier this month, i was lucky enough to get tickets to see nct 127 at the apple music event in la and was able to see them perform! this was by far one of the most amazing and intimate experiences i’ve ever been able to be apart of and being able to see nct 127 doing what they do best together is something i’m going to cherish in my heart for a very long time! here is the link to the full playlist of all their performances!! 

underneath the cut will be a much more detailed and in depth account of everything that happened at the event if anyone is interested in reading more about it! ♡

ok hello if there are people who actually decided to keep reading thank u so much and buckle up bc u are in for a riiiiiiiiiide (ridin on that VAAaaaaAAAAan, KEEP dRIVINGGGggGGG) ok anyways! HERE WE GO!

[ ! ] btw the first part is just me talking about everything that happened before the concert so pls feel free to just skip to the last paragraph instead LOL

so when news came out that nct 127 was going to be coming back to the u.s. and perform on jimmy kimmel and that tickets were FREE, my friends and i hi kellie, hi tracey all tried to get some tickets for both the taping and the concert and was able to make it on the waitlist! i don’t live in california but both of my friends do so i told them that if any of us got confirmed tickets, i’d be flying over there for the weekend to attend the show! it’s kind of all a blur now bc the only thing i can remember within that week was stressing out so hard over tickets because the way the whole thing was set up was just SO STRESSFUL because despite being on the waitlist, there is no 100% guarantee that you’d get tickets and they start giving out tickets to people from within a week before the taping to the day of the actual event so really, it was just one massive waiting game. but a week went by and none of us saw any signs of getting tickets and flight ticket prices kept fluctuating for me so i just went ahead and booked my flight anyways without a confirmed ticket pls don’t ever do this omfg please please PLEASE don’t ever do this!!! and PRAYED that one of us would be able to get tickets ;; a few days went by and then nct kept releasing more news and how they’d be performing at mickey mouse’s 90th birthday celebration so tickets for that were also available too and once again, we made it on the waitlist!!! and played not one but now two (2) waiting games!!!! :-)))

honestly i rly don’t remember much that happened during this small time frame bc i was so stressed and anxious over these tickets that it rly took a toll on me physically and mentally LOL but yeah so on wednesday the 3rd, nct 127 posted on their instagram about how they’d be having a special performance partnered with apple music and i was about to start my math exam but the moment i read their post, i ran to the bathroom faster than i’ve ever ran before and of course, i requested tickets and made it on the waitlist again!!!! SO NOW IN TOTAL, IT WAS NOT ONE, BUT THREE (3) WAITING GAMES!!! GAMES THAT I WAS STARTING TO GET SICK OF PLAYING!!! anyways yeah so basically my friends and i made it onto all 3 waiting lists and at this point we really just wanted to be able to make it to at least one event ;;;

fast forward to friday, aka 1 day before mickey mouse and 3 days before kimmel and apple music and also the day my flight leaves for la!!! my friends and i all got a big fat no from mickey mouse saying they wouldn’t be able to accommodate our ticket requests bc they were full so we we re like ok!!! whatevs!!! we still have kimmel and apple to try for!!! so here i am… at the airport… getting ready to leave with no!!! confirmed!!! ticket!!! my flight was quite early in the morning so i was at the airport overnight and it was like around 11:30pm when i was doing homework and i got a notification on my phone… thinking it was just some random notification when in reality, I GOT MY CONFIRMED TICKET FOR THE APPLE MUSIC EVENT :’) it’s a blur to me bc it happened so fast and so suddenly but all i remember was that my jaw literally dropped for the longest time and my hands were shaking so badly bc i cOULDN’T BELIEVE IT??? i wasn’t able to sleep that entire night nor was i able to sleep on the plane from all the adrenaline so that saturday really was an interesting day for me LOL anywho i made it to la safe and sound and spent saturday and sunday hanging out with my friends while we prepared for monday :’)

ok so then despite getting tickets, we had no idea where the location of this event was going to be bc 1iota (the event organizer) wasn’t going to release the information until 10am monday morning and we were planning on waiting in line like early early to get a good spot so we had to be ready and out of the house by 9am!!! bUT WAIT!!! 9am was also when the english version of the mv was going to be released so me and kellie were both !!! bc we wanted to gif the mv so bad!!! so now at this point it’s like 7am and we’re all like half awake trying frantically to get ready and i’m over here trying to stream nct on the radio and listen to the world release of regular eng ver and then somewhere in between all of this, both kellie and tracey ended up getting their emails for confirmed tickets too??? so yeah at this point all three of us are running around like crazy ppl bc we weren’t expecting all of us to go but now all 3 of us get to go!!! so yeah i brought my laptop with me and tried to gif in the car but the connection from my hotspot was so slow so i just sat and cried instead :-) ALSO!!! remember how information about the location was supposed to be released at 10am? yeah well they changed it on us again!!! they delayed it to 2pm so at this point me and kellie rly wanted to d*e bc we did all of that rushing for nothing omfg but fast forward to 2pm, they released the information for the location and since we were already in the hollywood area we went there right away so when we lined up, we were like number 10 in line!!! :D

i wasn’t able to eat at all that entire day just bc i was so stressed and so nervous from everything that the hunger didn’t hit me til like 20 mins before the actual event omg ;;;; i remember saying “omg i’m so hungry” and the girl beside me was like “well sweetie, you’re about to be fed real good rn” and i just died laughing oh my god but yeah i had a priority ticket so i was let in around 7:30pm-ish and the event started at 8! i got barricade again just like last time at kcon ny, my view was reeeeeeally good!! ! i would say even better than kcon’s even tho i was front and center for kcon ;;; back when we were in line, the event organizers kept asking us how we were doing and each time i would tell them that i was super nervous and they’d ask why and i would explain that i just get super nervous before seeing nct omg it’s really true tho idk what it is but i just feel so QUEASY before seeing them… like the fact that you go from seeing them from your screen to seeing them in front of you is just a very STRANGE FEELING FOR ME OK but they kept repeating how we were all going to have a good time and that the space inside was super small so it’s going to be nice and intimate with them and they said how no matter what spot you get, you’re still going to be super close to them… one of the staff members was like “you’re going to be so close to them they’re going to sweat on you” AND GOD THIS JUST MADE ME EVEN MORE NERVOUS KASDJKSAJDKAJDKA

OK ANYWAYS ENOUGH OF THAT, ONTO THE ACTUAL CONCERT! when we got in, the event was actually on a rooftop and so the scenery behind the stage was just soooooo pretty and then they had a playlist of their songs playing in the bg and it was just really nice to listen and enjoy while we waited for them to come out :’) the members kept hiding behind this door and some of them started waving and they were all teasing us so hard bc the moment we saw someone there, we would all start screaming and they just wouldn’t stop :’) then they finally played the apple music documentary video for us and i just remember all of us screaming a lot LOL but then the lights went off again and then we all watched them walk onto the stage one by one and oh my GOD the wait for them to finally start just felt like forever and then next thing i know, the sirens went off and all i hear is “GET IT LIFTED” and then firetruck started omg i was trying to get jaehyun’s attention but then mr. nakamoto yuta… YUTA… looked over on our side and me and him made eye contact for a good solid 3 seconds and i just about lost my shit omg… HE IS SO INSANELY GORGEOUS IN REAL LIFE I WAS RLY GOIN THRU IT… JAEHYUN WHO??? AND THEN HAECHAN OMG… haechan came over to our side like 75% of the time and he is the cutest, most adorable person on this planet!!! he was always smiling and waving and i really can’t think of anything else to describe him other than the sun bc he quite literally was shining that night!!! i think it was halfway through firetruck that we started to realize that the stage was like… a little slippery??? but it wasn’t until limitless started where we really noticed the members starting to slip and stumble here and there ;; also there’s this one part where jaehyun went up super close to me during limitless and i about died… i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again but even after seeing him irl, HE IS SO HANDSOME IT’S UNREAL… HIS VISUALS ARE OUT OF THIS WORLD I CAN’T GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD but yeah the staff members would go on stage after each song to try their best to dry the stage but for some reason that wasn’t enough ;; i have no idea why the stage was so slippery but my guess was that it was pretty cool up on the rooftop and with the amount of people there, there was so much body heat in the air and then that mixed with the cool air = condensation??? i also think the shoes the members were wearing had like absolutely no friction at the bottom so it made them slip even more ;; they were also using a fog machine too but idk if that was actually the reason why the stage was so slipper omg but yeah after firetruck, they performed limitless and then they had a small ment here and mark talked about how it was a very special day for them (bc they just came straight from performing at jimmy kimmel too) and then johnny screamed something along the words of being apple music’s next up next artist and he was just so happy!!!! and then mark said that they’ve got october all to themselves and they were so happy to be able to be here with all of the fans! jaehyun also said that the place was so wonderful and said all the fans there were so wonderful and johnny came in to say that they had rehearsals the night before but being there with all the fans, it was a totally different feeling ;~; after that they performed touch and then when it came to cherry bomb (OT10 VER WITH JUNGWOO BTW), this was when things started to look a little :/// bc taeyong had already fell back during touch and at this point i was already beyond worried bc i would rather have them stop the whole thing all together rather than have them risk getting injured just to perform for us??? i shouted so many times to “be careful” in both korean and english T________T IT WAS LIKE THE DREAM CONCERT ALL OVER AGAIN WHEN THEY PERFORMED IN THE RAIN not to mention they had comeback promotions to do once they back to korea too so i rly just wanted them to stop ;;; i also think the members were all starting to get a little discouraged from all the slipping and stumbling during each performance and it kinda just looked like they were all really sad that they couldn’t put on a perfect performance ;; at this point the stage was soooooo slippery and i think they were more focused on not falling rather than performing and my heart rly just was in pieces ;;; taeyong fell again in cherry bomb during the leg split dance and it looked so painful oh my god i was just so WORRIED and i wanted it all to stop so bad ;~; but after cherry bomb ended, i think the members went back down to talk to the staff and then they came back up with different shoes! but finally!!! alas, they performed regular!!! since they switched shoes, the performance went pretty smoothly so i felt a little at ease! taeil, doyoung and mark were still wearing their original shoes so there were a few times when they slipped a little but thank god none of them actually fell ;; despite the song being a released earlier that morning, a lot of the fans did really well in learning the fanchants and singing along with the boys so i think it really helped in boosting the members’ confidence after the prior performances ;; there was a small ment here and doyoung talked and johnny translated it saying how basically the members felt really apologetic that they couldn’t put on good performances bc of the slippery stage and i was yelling with all the energy i had left in my that it was ok!!! that they were doing amazing and that they shouldn’t feel sorry!!! IT WAS KILLING ME INSIDE THAT THEY FELT THIS ASKDJKASDJAKJSDKD I WANTED TO ACTUALLY D*E but then they promised they’d come back to show an even better performance and doyoung held up his lil pinky!!! and then johnny asked how taeyong was doing and he answered back “i’m okay!!!” IN THE CUTEST WAY POSSIBLE… I JUST WANTED TO GIVE HIM ONE BIG FAT HUG T________________T and then taeyong said the last mission they had left was to take a picture with the fans and took out the selfie stick to take a picture with everyone! it was so cute TwT 

but yeah, overall the whole experience was really really amazing minus the slippery stage and for the most part, i was really impressed with how organized 1iota was! i’m really grateful i got to be apart of it and it still feels like a dream that i got to attend the event and see them perform and promote their new album here in america!!! they were amazing performers and did so well despite everything! i was really really proud of them ;; anyways, thank you to everyone that made it this far!!! i hope you enjoyed this fan account! i know it’s a super long post but if i don’t write it all out now while it’s still somewhat fresh in my mind, i’m going to forget it by the end of the month so i hope you all understand! thank you so much! ♡

[chakazard]

I do not believe art needs to be neat or happy or easily digestible.  I also do not believe art needs to shit on things or disturb or shock for shock’s sake.  But art from a trusted source that plays with identity and leaves the viewer thinking that the artist has bared the deepest part of their soul (or is it kayfabe?)  is right up my proverbial alley.  After 20 years of following his lyrics - stretching for puns, left-leaning politics, and general irreverence, NOFX mastermind Fat Mike is one of my most trusted sources of art - and in my opinion he may only now be reaching his prime after the brilliant First Ditch Effort album and now, his first full-length original side project, You’re Welcome by Cokie the Clown.

Cokie the Clown is Fat Mike’s disturbing and depressed alter ego/self-caricature.  “This isn’t punk rock, it’s Performance Art”  he said from the stage last night at the Brooklyn Bazaar.   If it’s not kayfabe, Mike is using a layer of greasepaint to separate himself from his ego and process the grief, heartbreak, failure and isolation that he might normally block out or channel into humor.  The songs he sang that night covered suicides both attempted (his ex, which he foiled) and succeeded (his roomate’s), overdoses, and euthanasia (”That Time I Killed My Mom”), interspersed with a cartoon sound effect library and blunt and joyless stories about raunchy sex.  Armed with an oversized mallet (”its not real wood but it still hurts”) instead of a bass guitar, he bopped his band mates and fans jokingly, and himself a little less jokingly, between songs. I got the impression, from the bear hugs he gave his fellow musicians, that he was thrilled to have made an album outside of his comfort zone with musicians other than his usual partners in crime. He seemed excited that less people walked out of this show than his two on the west coast, too. For his closing number, music industry kiss-off "Fuck You All", his mic stand or lyric stand slid down to the ground, leaving him bent over and screaming while hordes of supporters cheered on, middle fingers raised high.

Identity is one of my obsessions, and I am fascinated by the idea that Fat Mike had to create, or manifest this Cokie the Clown persona in order to explore his traumatic experiences. Who would be taken less seriously, seen as less trustworthy than a drug addict who is also a literal clown? Is this a subversion of expectation? Does it make it safer to say the most serious things in the least serious guise? Does the painted on frown give Mike permission to keep frowning and relive the moments of his life which were least happy? Is he playing with the audience, like during Cokie's first public experience, when he duped the audience into thinking they had drank his urine? Does the separation of punk rock music from the ballads and orchestral instruments found on this album help him get into a different mindset? (Mike introduced a member of the string section as Cello Biafra!) It is these questions almost as much as the songs that draws me to this project in particular. Depression and identity issues, explored by one of my favorite songwriters? I am there.

The amazing Ange (she'll be king) bought me a VIP ticket to my birthday, so Fat Mike was supposed to do a meet & greet before the show. When he didn't show, some people started speculating he od'd in the bathroom, which would have been grimly appropriate for this show. Turns out he was asleep and promised to make good after the show. I didn't want to push through the autograph seekers and at least one sexual propositioner, and didn't know what to say anyway. But the clown himself told me (well, a group, but he was looking right in my eyes) how excited he was that Richard O'Brien liked the album because Rocky Horror was his first musical influence, and later I thought we had a mutual eye roll when somebody did something annoying, but I couldve imagined it. I also kinda waved at Danny Lohner, who produced the album and played guitar on a few songs during the show, on my way out.

I'm always going to be a NOFX fan and a Fat Mike fan. They're probably not the first thing you'd think of, but I'm always going to love his sad songs. And I'm always going or be fascinated with how artists play with identity and assign different works to different personas. I feel very lucky that I got to see the Cokie the Clown show because I can't imagine it's easy on his emotions to do that often. I wouldn't necessarily call it a good night but it was a hella worthwhile one. That's my art.

[heidiroizen]

More rare than a Unicorn – gender parity at a venture-backed, deep-tech startup. Here’s how they did it.

One of my most memorable board meetings this year was with Memphis Meats. I literally had to stop the board meeting over one slide, as I had never seen a slide like this in my 20 years as a VC.  

And no, it wasn’t about product development or regulatory strategy or burn rate. It was about the company’s newest hires -- five highly accomplished people, all of whom with advanced degrees and significant past achievements in their careers.

And all five were women.

I stopped the CEO, Uma Valeti, right at that moment, to tell him I had never seen a slide like that.  And that in turn surprised him, which probably explains in part why Memphis Meats is such a leader when it comes to diversity.

Memphis Meats is a trailblazing company whose mission is to grow real meat from the cells of high quality livestock in a clean, controlled environment. The result is the meat that consumers already know and love, with significant collateral benefits to the planet, to animals and to human health. I’m proud to say they have applied that same trailblazing attitude to growing their team as well.

At Memphis Meats today, 53% of the team are women, and 40% of the company’s leadership positions are held by women. Beyond gender, the team represents 11 nations and 5 continents (Australians, please apply!) and about two-thirds of the team are omnivores, while one-third are vegetarians or vegans. I’ve met most of the team, and I heard all sorts of educational backgrounds: B.S., M.S., M.D., M.B.A., Ph.D. (lots of those). I met parents, brothers, sisters, immigrants, activists, friends, researchers and operators, and I heard 34 different, mission-aligned reasons for joining the company.

Anybody who is paying attention knows that companies and workplaces around the country are grappling with how to build and maintain diverse and inclusive workforces. Silicon Valley is certainly no different – gender imbalance is a well documented problem in tech.  Once I saw that slide, I knew I had to dig deeper into what Memphis Meats was doing right. So, I sat down with Megan Pittman, the Director of People Operations at Memphis Meats, to learn more. Here’s what she had to say.

HR: Before we talk about diversity and inclusion at Memphis Meats, we should probably start by defining what we mean when we say those words. What do they mean to you?

MP: We believe that having a diverse and inclusive team happens when you build a culture that’s genuine, welcoming and protected. We don’t have a document that outlines “D&I Policies” here. We didn’t start by looking at our team and saying “wow, there’s a problem here that we need to fix.” We started by committing to build an inclusive company made up of extraordinary individuals. We committed to putting people first, before anything else. We also made the decision to build a People Ops function early, when we only had about 10 employees, so that we could really follow through on these commitments.

HR: I see a lot of companies hire their first HR person when they have 50 or 100 staff. 10 is early! What were some of the changes you were able to make by getting started early?

MP: We’ve curated a high touch and authentic hiring process. After we closed our Series A last summer, we got started on a hiring plan to grow from 10 to about 40 people, and we wanted to do it in about a year. We began recruiting and interviewing immediately!

Pretty quickly, we realized that our interview process wasn’t working very well. We were spending a lot of time with candidates who had amazing resumes, but we weren’t developing unanimous conviction around who to hire. We weren’t being blown away. So we stopped interviewing for a bit and started debugging. We realized that our interviews were too formulaic, and too focused on checking boxes on the job description. We were talking to people who had already accomplished amazing things – in industry or academia, or both – and we weren’t letting them tell that story. So we couldn’t assess their accomplishments, their ambitions and their ability to innovate. We could only assess their resume, and maybe their small talk skills.

We decided to rebuild the process to let the candidates shine. Now, we ask all prospective hires to start their interview day by giving a ~30 minute talk to our team, typically focused on their greatest accomplishments or a topic that they know extremely well. The talks are a great way to see a candidate at his or her best. They provide great context for the 1-on-1 interviews later in the day. And our team learns something new every time a candidate comes in. There have been some pretty amazing light bulb moments and inspiring conversations that have originated because of these talks. Our team loves them – they’re always a hot ticket in our office!

HR: How do the talks connect back to diversity and inclusion?

MP: The talks let us have a really relevant, organic conversation and put the candidate’s resume to the side for a moment. After the talk, we can ask the candidate how they could have done that better, or faster, or cheaper. We can hone in on moments where they did something creative, and learn about their thought process or problem solving strategies. We can hone in on roadblocks, and understand how they motivate themselves through the most difficult moments.

We’ve seen plenty of data showing that companies that hire based on resumes and checkboxes end up with homogenous workforces. Don’t get me wrong – great resumes and hard skills are requirements at Memphis Meats, but they’re the price of admission and not the focus of our hiring process. When we go beyond the resume, and let the candidate shine, and expand the hiring criteria to include self-awareness and creativity and tenacity, we see a very diverse group of people rise to the top. And they happen to be the exact people that we need.

Now that we’ve been doing this for a while, we’re also getting better at writing job descriptions. Our hiring managers now ask “what do we need our next person to bring that our team doesn’t already have?” There is a quote by Walter Lippman, an American writer, that speaks to the importance of this. He says, “When all think alike, then no one is thinking.” Our team is sold on the value of new perspectives, and we’re now thinking about it before we even start to meet candidates. It’s a virtuous cycle.

HR: What happens after the hiring process? Great, you’ve found the person – now what?

MP: We’ve put a number of tools in place to ensure that we can close great candidates and get them into their new role here. For example, mobility platforms have enabled us to not be limited to hiring scientists, engineer or operators in the immediate Bay Area. We are able to comfortably source individuals from top companies or labs – whereverthey are. Switzerland? No problem. Canada? Great! Minnesota? Easy. We offer professionally managed relocations so that we can pull talent from a much bigger pool.

We have partnered with a top immigration attorney so that we can support any qualified individual in obtaining employment eligibility. We have worked with hires on multiple visa applications but one sticks out. We interviewed an incredible scientist who is a French citizen. She is so smart, so hard-working, and so talented. For a few reasons, we realized we would only be able to hire her on an O-1 visa, which is reserved for individuals with “extraordinary ability.” The bar is high, and nobody is a sure thing to get this type of visa. We spent months working on the application, and demonstrating her accomplishments as thoroughly and accurately as possible. After more months of waiting, we literally received her visa approval hours before her previous employment eligibility expired. The entire Memphis Meats team celebrated. The room started cheering, we high-fived, we picked up a cake, I probably cried. She has since been named on our most recent patent filing and has contributed in so many measurable and immeasurable ways to our team. She was absolutely the right person to hire and we did everything we could to make it happen.

We diligently pay fair to market wages and make offers that are not based on salary history. We have never requested salary history from our new hires. We prefer to base all offers on the market, our fundraising stage, precedent in the company and level of experience. Period. We take every offer very seriously and will continue to make that commitment to every one of our team members.

We constantly solicit feedback on our processes and look at data. We track the source of our hires: are we relying too much on one company or one local university lab? We track the candidate experience: are candidates feeling respected by us, our process and our timelines? We track our internal rates of diversity. All of this works to discourage complacency in our processes, and ensure that we are constantly aiming to be better.

We took a different approach to benefits compared to many other venture backed companies. We don’t invest our money into dry cleaning and massages and abundant free meals. Instead, we’ve invested in a generous paid family leave policy, and great health care, and a floating holiday policy that allows for religious or cultural differences. People need to be able to live their lives how they choose with a job that supports that without question. We ask a lot of team members so it’s our responsibility to support them in their lifestyle choices.  

HR: Many companies start with the best intentions, and compromise those as they grow. How do you imagine Memphis Meats staying the course?

MP: We’ve really made inclusiveness part of our identity. This goes way beyond a D&I policy, which can be easily forgotten or lost in a handbook.

We talk a lot about our “big tent,” which is really a cornerstone of our company. We’re making meat in a better way. You might think we’re out to “disrupt” an incumbent industry or to make consumers feel guilty about what they’re eating today, but the opposite is true. We recognize and respect the role that meat plays in our cultures and traditions. Many members of our team eat meat, and we celebrate that. Many members of our team do not eat meat, and we celebrate that. There’s just no place here for moral judgment.

Over time, that philosophy expanded to cover the companies and organizations we work with, the investors we raised money from, and the language we use. We happily work with large meat companies like Tyson and Cargill. We happily work with mission-driven organizations that work for animal welfare or environmental stewardship. We happily talk to consumers of all stripes. We’ve built a coalition that we never would have expected. We’ve found that everyone we talk to unites behind our goal of feeding a growing and hungry planet. Our internal culture and our people processes are consistent with the idea of the “big tent,” so I don’t think they’re going anywhere.

[rekarra]

Breaking Through Shadows | Prologue

Plot: This was the best weekend that my best friend and I were ever going to have. Or was it?

Genre: Fluff, slight angst, eventual smut. idol!au

Word Count: 1.5k

Pairing: Leaving this blank for now, for plot, or something.

Point of View: First person oc

Warning: Language, slight mentions of past trauma, talk of panic attacks

Author’s Note: I finally decided that I needed to write my own piece. There will be multiple parts because my imagination can’t seem to stop right now. The next chapter will have more because this is really just a very very very small taste of what’s going on in my head

The day was here. It was happening. After all the planning and waiting, my best friend, Chyler and I were finally getting to see -them- live. And not just live, I had gone all out, making a whole event out of it. It wasn’t just a concert for the two of us, it was a chance to spend some much needed time with the one person who was always there for me, having spared no expense in treating the two of us for the whole weekend. Booking the best suite available at the Sheraton that was right across the street from the venue that -they- would be performing, managing to get coveted backstage passes, access to the meet and greet and after party. The last thing was the spa day for tomorrow I had booked, knowing the both of us would be tired, sore from dancing and probably hung over.  I hadn’t told Chyler about this last surprise since it was a very belated birthday present for her.

The beautiful girl next to me bounced on the balls of her feet, her bottom lip caught in between her teeth, reminding you of why I had nicknamed her Bunny all those years ago. “I can’t believe this is actually happening, Mallory!” All the excitement in Chyler’s body leaking through to her voice, making her usually sultry voice higher pitched than normal.

I smiled wide, her frenzy fueling my own. “I know. We’ve been waiting for this for years and the only thing standing in our way are those doors and the guards behind them. Think we can take them?” I laughed sarcastically as I knew the doors would open in just a few more minutes, no real seriousness behind the feeble threat.

This whole trip had been wonderful. Perfect, actually, compared to everything I had gone through to get to this point. The initial disappointment of not being able to snag tickets when they first went on sale, having sold out in a matter of seconds, had almost derailed the whole trip. But I hadn’t been able to spend time with my bestie in months, real life had taken control as we both received very generous offers from hospitals miles apart from each other, so even if the concert fell through, I was still dragging her with me out of town for the weekend. I thought back to how Chyler and I first meet. Both nervous first-year nursing students, set up as lab partners and the two of us had been inseparable since then. We were each other's rock. She was there for me when I didn’t think I would make it out of school, and, likewise, I had been there for her when things had gotten rough for her.

A noise pulled me out of your memories before they had a chance to turn too dark, thinking about what had happened to the loveliest person in my life. I glanced down at my phone, seeing that it was time for the doors to open. Wide-eyed, I turned to the ball of buzzing energy next to me. “It’s time, Bunny!”

The next few minutes flew by in a rush. As Chyler and I had been in the front of the line, the two of us felt the full surge of the mass of people press towards us when the doors opened. We didn’t have to be at the front of the line since the tickets had seemingly scored by magic allowed us to move freely backstage, but the slight elitist in me wanted to be at the front. I will always thank whatever was out there that had persuaded me to enter that contest, thinking it was a long shot and I had no actual chance at winning everything the two of us would be treated to once we got past the doors.

The two of us sailed through the security measures that had been put in place. Having read that bags would be checked, I had only brought my cell phone with you, along with my ID and debit card, all of which I managed to tuck into the pocket of my low rise jeans. I adjusted my pants slightly after getting through the metal detectors, feeling mild discomfort at how much skin I was showing, but no matter how much I tugged your jeans up or pulled my barely cropped halter top down, there was still a fair bit of my lower waist and back showing.

“How many times do I have to tell you, Mallory?” My friend hung on your arm. “You look fucking hot! Stop trying to hide all the time. You worked your ass off, literally, for how awesome you look. Be proud. And besides, none of these people care what you look like and you��ll never see them again.”

Knowing she was right, I tried my best to give myself the confidence that Chyler was radiating towards me. Smiling at her, I nod. “It’s still an hour and a half before they get on stage. Do you want to go check out the merch before we head backstage?” She smiled in agreement and the two of us went to see what we could spend our hard earned money on.

The next hour or so was spent surrounded by exasperated parents who had hordes of preteen girls in tow. Late teens, whose hormones were beyond control, talking about all the sordid things they with do just to get a chance to go backstage, and the occasional mid-twenty year old, who I could tell by the way they looked at the younger people around had been following -them- since the beginning, just like I had. I took my phone out of my pocket, now very aware of the fact that there were only thirty minutes left before the show started. I grabbed my bunny’s hand and dragged her with me, trying to fight my way out of the crowd, looking for the signs that would lead to backstage.

15 minutes later, Chyler and I were stand in front of two rather imposing men who had “Security” plastered across their chest, as if their demeanor didn’t let me or anyone else know that they had no problem removing someone from the situation if it was needed. I smiled coolly at them and their eyes narrowed, probably thinking that I was about to proposition them like I had heard the teens say they were going to do. Hastily, we both showed the magical piece of plastic that was hanging off our necks. The pass that would allow us access beyond them. The guards' lips drew out into thin lines before they nodded and moved aside to let us through.

Sighing softly at not receiving any further hassle from security, we make your way through the various techs, wardrobe managers, makeup artist, back up dancers and other members of the staff, finding your way over to the side of the stage, having dragged my bewildered friend by her wrist with me. Neither of us had ever done something like this, we had always been with the rest of the mob that we had left behind once we had gotten past security, but it appeared I was adjusting to it more rapidly than my precious bunny, her eyes the widest I had ever seen them.

Gently, I wrapped my arms around her, having seen the slight flash of panic set in. “It’s okay, bunny. I’ve got you. We’re here to have an amazing time. Just breathe with me.” I took in deep breaths, waiting for Chyler to follow my lead. After a few breaths like that, she finally took in a large lung full of air and exhaled it slowly, before inhaling in time with my own. This is what I meant when we were each other’s rock. We both knew each other well enough to see when things were starting to go wrong. Chyler always built me up and I was the only person who knew how to break her out of her panics.

She looked up at me, unshed tears just starting to fill her eyes that were quickly blinked away before they had a chance to fall. She took another substantial breath and nodded, her shy smile hinting her lips as her cheeks flushed slightly with embarrassment.  

Just then, the lights in the building went out, though there was enough illumination backstage that I knew Chyler saw my own eyes get wide with excitement. “Here we go, bun!” I smiled before grabbing her hand in my own, lacing my fingers in hers as I turned to face the stage.

Seven figures walked out on to the expansive set that had been built for them. I didn’t think anyone but those who were backstage could see their outlines since the expected uproar from the rest of the audience never came. At least, not until the bass from one of their more recent hits started thrumming through the stacks and stacks of speakers and amplifiers. Just as the main synthesizer was about to start up, the sound of feedback broke into the venue, making everyone clutch at their ears in pain. But the feedback didn’t stop. It only got worse, then started to fade in and out, getting louder and louder each time until it started to form into a very familiar sound.

The sound of my fucking alarm……

| Chapter 1 |

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Canelo Álvarez vs. Caleb Plant Los Angeles Press Conference Quotes & Photos

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Published: September 21, 2021

Pound-For-Pound King Canelo Álvarez and Undefeated Champion Caleb Plant Come To Blows Previewing Undisputed Super Middleweight World Championship Event Saturday, November 6 on SHOWTIME PPV® at MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas in a Premier Boxing Champions Event.

LOS ANGELES (September 21, 2021) – Boxing’s consensus No. 1 pound-for-pound fighter, Mexican superstar and unified WBA/WBC/WBO Super Middleweight World Champion Canelo Álvarez and undefeated IBF Super Middleweight World Champion Caleb “Sweethands” Plant met for an intense staredown that turned into a scuffle Tuesday at a press conference previewing their historic and highly anticipated undisputed super middleweight championship showdown. During an extended face-off that kicked off the event, the fighters exchanged words and threw glancing blows before their respective teams rushed the stage to separate the combatants, escalating a rivalry that will culminate on fight night in just over six weeks. Canelo and Plant will battle on Saturday, November 6, live on SHOWTIME PPV at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas in a Premier Boxing Champions event, with the winner stamping his name in the history books as the first undisputed 168-pound world champion of the four-belt era. Tickets for the live event are on sale now and can be purchased at AXS.com. The event is promoted by Canelo Promotions and TGB Promotions andsponsored by Hennessy and Value. Eddy Reynoso, Canelo’s trainer and manager, and Justin Gamber, Plant’s trainer, joined their fighters on stage at the event in Beverly Hills. Here is what the press conference participants had to say Tuesday: CANELO ÁLVAREZ “You are not on my level and you will see on November 6. You don’t want to fight now, I promise you. “We come from nothing and we worked hard to be here. For somebody to lie and talk trash about us, that upset Eddy. It is what it is though. We just have to show everyone who we are on November 6. “Caleb might be on the same level as Billy Joe Saunders and Callum Smith, but he’s not on my level. I respect that he isn’t here to back down. You can see from today that this is definitely going to be a good fight. “I know what I need to do and I know a lot about him. He’s a good fighter but I know my skills. My experience is going to give me the edge in the fight. I have faced similar styles to Caleb’s against Floyd Mayweather, Erislandy Lara, Austin Trout, and Saunders. “He’s an insecure person and that’s why he came with a lot of excuses about lots of things. I don’t care about it though. I’m just going to do my best on November 6 and win the fight. “To be undisputed is history for Mexico and for everyone on my team. To be the undisputed champion is just a great thing for my career. On the on-stage scuffle: “You can say whatever to me, but not to my mom. I’m going to fight anyone who says something about my mom. And he swung first. I just pushed him. He swung first, and I do what I do. He crossed the line. “It will be over in eight rounds or less. I’m going to knock out this guy. Easy.” CALEB PLANT “I know only one thing better than proving people right, and that’s proving people wrong. I’ve been doing that my whole life. As soon as I stepped on the stage, people started talking about what I can’t accomplish and what I can’t do. Where I come from, there is no boxing community. There was no other pro I could look to and say that if he can do it, then I can do it. All I had was my mind and my heart. “I don’t do this to be famous or to get attention. When I first started, it was just me and my dad. No one thought I’d be standing here today. I can remember him and my grandfather scrounged up a little bit of money to open a little boxing gym. There was just one heavy bag hanging in the corner. But when you really want something, you don’t need all the fancy things. You just need your mind and your heart. “I know that people don’t believe me when I tell them I’m winning on November 6. All those people who tell me that I can’t do something, you live believable lives and you do believable things. I promised myself that I was going to run this all the way to the top, with no problem crashing and burning along the way. I set out to live an unbelievable life and accomplish unbelievable things. Those people who doubt me are the very reason that I’m here. “Miguel Cotto’s brother can make you do the chicken dance but I can’t? Okay. Mark my words, on November 6 you will hear the words, ‘And the new undisputed super middleweight champion,’ but you will also hear the words, ‘and still undefeated.’ “Being undisputed would mean a lot. I’ve sacrificed so much to this sport and I’ve been doing this a long time. All that work would come down to one moment. I want my name in those history books and that’s the only reason that I’m here. On the on-stage scuffle: “We just had some normal back-and-forth banter up there and then whatever happened, happened. It’s none of my concern though. I’m focused and locked in on November 6.” EDDY REYNOSO, Canelo’s Trainer and Manager “I think this is going to be a great fight, one where we unify the 168-pound division. As we do with every fight, we’re going to work hard in the gym. We’ve always worked hard in the gym. "I'm a little upset by how things turned out today, but in the end, we will settle things in the ring on November 6. "The offensive language is what offended us the most. We are respectful people, and we move forward from this with our heads held up high. Now we are going to train well, win the fight and see what comes next after that. “There are a lot of people who say things on social media but then they don’t show up. Some people want to take down a whole country and a great athlete that represents his country. They talk a lot of trash. You need to work hard though. You need to have guts to work as hard as we do.” JUSTIN GAMBER, Plant’s Trainer “I want to thank our whole team for believing in us and getting us this fight that we wanted and this opportunity to make history. It’s been blood sweat and tears, literally, to get here. It’s been a long journey. This fight is not about money, it’s about legacy. “In 1996, when I was 15-years-old, my favorite fighter was the IBF Super Middleweight World Champion Roy Jones Jr. Every fan back then craved an undisputed champion at 168-pounds and now I train the IBF champion and we’re going to be fighting for all of the marbles. “Tune in on November 6 and you will see the first undisputed super middleweight champion of the world and he’s from Tennessee. Anything that happened today at this press conference is going to drive us and give us more hunger. TOM BROWN, President of TGB Promotions “It took a couple of tries, but here we are today with the undisputed super middleweight championship on November 6. It’s a real pleasure to be working with our network partners at SHOWTIME for this event. SHOWTIME has a long history of being involved in the sports’ biggest and most important events and that continues with this fight. “It’s an honor to be working with the pound-for-pound king Canelo Álvarez, Eddy Reynoso and everyone with Canelo Promotions. I’m also thrilled to be back working with everyone on team Plant. I promoted Caleb’s pro debut in 2014 and it’s great to see him up here today in this position. “Canelo holds three titles, while Caleb owns the fourth title in the 168-pound division. They’ll battle to become the first undisputed champ in the four-belt era. History will be made on November 6 at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas.” STEPHEN ESPINOZA, President, SHOWTIME Sports “2021 has been a phenomenal year for SHOWTIME Boxing. It’s one of our most prolific years in recent memory. SHOWTIME has delivered 17 live boxing events so far this year, with several more to come. Eight world championship fights, multiple world title unifications, and now two fights for the undisputed title as a very good year for SHOWTIME becomes a great year for SHOWTIME. SHOWTIME is the home of big fights. It’s the most trusted and longest-tenured network in boxing. There is no other network making a more meaningful or more significant commitment to the sport of boxing. We are the home of boxing’s biggest and best fights. “We are proud to welcome Canelo Álvarez back to SHOWTIME. We also welcome Caleb Plant for his SHOWTIME debut. It was almost nine years ago – September 15, 2012 – that Canelo made his debut on SHOWTIME in a thrilling fight against Josesito Lopez. Nine years is a long time. That was a very young Canelo Álvarez and a very young Eddy Reynoso. That started an impressive run of fights in which Canelo demonstrated his willingness, desire, and demand to take the toughest fights available. Together back in 2013, we set a record at the time for the biggest pay-per-view of all time as we helped launch Canelo as boxing’s newest pay-per-view star. Now nine years later, we are proud to welcome him back for this mega-fight.”

(Featured Photo: Amanda Westcott/Showtime)

[zukadiary]

Ill Conceived Terror Trip Day 1: West Side Story

After I made that dramatic post about missing Daimon’s ohirome, one KazukiMotherfuckingSora showed up to rehearsal in red nails and dangly earrings, and here I am for a meager week, something my fear of flying and I never planned nor desired to attempt, least of all in the winter with my vacation days tapped out and my work schedule running 11pm-7am. Daylight where?

This whole situation is so... unfortunate. It’s ticket cancellation hell; I was supposed to go with three friends today and all their tickets evaporated. My second ticket got cancelled too. But faced with the painful reality that barring a true miracle this show will be entirely lost to the void, I’m feeling very lucky for the one shot I got, and very justified in deciding extremely late be extremely stupid. I wish something this good didn’t have to be this ephemeral. I tried my very best to burn it into my jet lagged memory... knowing West Side Story helped.

Other than dilution of the racism issue, the show was basically untouched. Some of that was just kind of lost in translation, but a bit was consciously altered (for example, America is all ladies minus the dissenting Shark men). EDIT: two people have now informed me that this was actually a movie change! Anyway, while it would be cool to see them tackle something like that, I get that there’s no cultural reference point, and I really can’t complain about my experience, other than that it was too short.

I’m rescinding all that haha. After a last minute blessed second viewing in which I comprehended significantly more dialogue, sure some things were still lost in translation but I feel comfortable calling this an EXTREMELY RESPECTABLE EFFORT ⭐

If you’re one of the lucky few with a future ticket, stop here and don’t deprive yourself of the impact.

Moment 1: the curtain rises on a few Jets with Zun-chan at the center looking, to be perfectly accurate, FINE AS HELL. Breathtakingly so. Grown up and absolutely slaying.

Moment 2: they start to move, and the work of the imported Broadway choreographer is immediately evident. Sometimes you don’t realize you’ve been watching Very Takarazuka Choreography until you see the same girls dancing something else. 

Moment 3: enter KikiBernardo, and all of my internal organs lurched upward a bit. If this is the beginning of Soragumi Kiki, be very afraid. 

Makaze enters casually after the opening dance number, without the typical dramatic “enter PAUSE” that leaves room for everyone to applaud the top star. The more I dwell on it, the happier I am that our first taste of Top Star Makaze Suzuho is a soft role; I live for Makaze struggling to keep the sexface just under the lethal dose, but her softness is also so beautiful. Love at first sight so strong you don’t even care that this asshole killed your brother is pretty unbelievable, but Makaze had me buying in 100%. And the 50s street clothes look—t-shirt under a collared shirt tucked loosely into slightly awkward dad jeans with a thick belt and sneakers, topped with a bomber depending on the scene—is SO GOOD for her. 

WSS is home run casting, for all the Soragumi members on this side of the split, but particularly for our pair of fresh top stars, and particularly at this stage. They have a lot of figuring each other out to do as a combi—specifically learning how to sing together—but this worked; they aced the naive and reckless Tony/Maria dynamic. Maria throughout is a flatter character than Madoka is capable of playing, but she took full advantage of the emotional final scene and was excruciating. The silences in between her words were deafening. 

Every dance number is an absolute delight: the fights more dynamic than most of the actual stage combat I’ve seen Takarazuka attempt; Mambo with its rotating pair dances and KikiSora giving everyone a lesson in erotic chemistry; America with its cha cha ruffles and my kid leading a pack of fierce musumeyaku; Cool being just that, featuring a really relatable moment of Zun-chan pleading “chill out” and Moeko screaming anyway; I couldn’t pick a favorite if I wanted to. There are some GENUINELY SCARY and hella impressive bits too; first someone... Zun-chan? (it’s APPALLING that my feeble memory is the only place this show can live) ((EDIT: it was Junna Subaru))  does some crazy jump flip thing and everyone catches her. Later Kiki SCALES A REALASS CHAIN LINK FENCE by 1) jumping right up to mid-fence 2) climbing to the top 3) UPSIDE DOWN FLIPPING HERSELF OVER THE TOP and 4) landing like a wild cat, resulting in possibly the hottest single feat I’ve witnessed on a stage (shortly afterwards pretty much everyone in a gang, including the TOP STAR who must be protected at all costs, followed suit with the partially upside down fence scaling).

Our notable Jets: Zun-chan, in addition to upping her look enough to stop my heart, still has this delightful little brother vibe about her that made her the perfect Riff, while still showing impressive leadership abilities as essentially the head of the group while Tony is off being lovestruck dumb. Another favorite was EBI as Velma (Zun’s girl), for her adorable look, her ace dancing, and her PFF BITCH NO faces made at Zun’s attempts to order her around. Fuuma Kakeru is forever the literal best, and likewise picture perfect in the 50s street urchin uniform. Monchi needed more opportunity to use her voice but got to wear glasses. Moeko gave an impressive effort as hot-headed Action, especially considering difficult choreography is not really her thing. BABY TONAMI, fresh 103rd Yumeshiro Aya as Anybodys, went above and beyond ken-1 (I still think roles of pure spunk are the easiest to slay, but impressive nonetheless). 

And our notable Sharks, working up to my Main Event: if you count lines said with your EYES, Sao might have had the biggest role in the whole show, along with absolutely perfect disgusting Grease hair (one stray lock on her forehead). She also made me cry at the end when she’s the only Shark to help carry Tony’s body. She outshone Riku (Chino) a bit, but much like Madoka, Riku also turned it up for the last scene, even with completely wordless acting. 

Dark, sleazy, terrifying, devastatingly handsome Kiki. Her Bernardo made the show (objectively... I KNOW I HAVEN’T GOTTEN TO *HER* YET). Every face and every mannerism was calculated and perfect. Wiping her hand on her pants every time she had to touch a Jet... somehow manufacturing absolutely electrifying chemistry with Soragumi’s giggliest loser idiot otokoyaku as her lady partner despite being BRAND NEW; the way she like inhaled Sora, and put firm hands on her with her fingers spread wide, and grabbed big deep handfuls of her skirt... Maybe all of Sora’s reactions were just straight up real. Favorite moments: their proper kiss; when they hook up in the Mambo scene and Sora slides her hand inside Kiki’s jacket to touch more of her actual back; Kiki being macho and gross and yelling at Sora to come here and Sora repeatedly replying hell no you come HERE until Kiki gives up (also notable: their perfect height difference, despite Sora in heels and Kiki in flats).

And SoraAnita, who put my sorry ass in this freezing Airbnb writing up this devastating show at 4 in the goddamn morning, who was so so so so good. It’s hard to look past the tight-top floof-bottom dresses and the adorable heeled sandals and the legs and the scene where she’s primping cross-legged in a chair wearing sheer thigh highs with garters and black lingerie that doesn’t even cover her butt which I don’t *at all* remember being in the movie... BUT, she was just so good. She made no attempt to change her voice (even though I’m pretty sure she could have) and it worked; I’m sure she spent much of rehearsal a mess but she was a fiery hot match for Kiki; she nailed all the feminine mannerisms and the bits of otokoyaku left over weren’t awkward but perfect Anita sass; the way she worked that tulle-laden skirt, her DANCING in Mambo and America; the way she big sister’d Madoka; and her final scene where the Jets assault her in the drug store, when she made me fully cry. I would hate myself forever and ever and ever if I hadn’t seen this. 

::Sigh:: It’s only a week but I kinda wish this had been my grand finale. 

[assassins-writing]

Masterlist

Because my actual masterlist is... Well, it’s a mess, and the tags don’t always work. So... Here’s this thing. All the writings in one place! Beware of titles- they were all mostly unnamed, and I had to improvise :’) If the read more isn’t working on mobile, let me know, loves!

NOTE: This is a MASSIVE post. You’ve been warned. <3 I’ll make sure it gets updated every time new things get posted!

Last update: June 10th

Desmond Miles

Desmond being a dad.

Summary: Desmond and his son spend the day together. Introducing: Dadmond.

Lessons

Summary: Desmond teaches Y/N how to ride a motorbike. Fun?

Back to the Future day!

Summary: Wrote this on, you guessed it- Back to the Future day! Movie marathon with Y/N and Desmond.

Lazy days.

Summary: Desmond and Y/N are watching movies and honestly, someone can’t stay awake.

Relax.

Summary: Desmond is stressed. Y/N tries to help him in the only way she knows: video games.

A barista and a bartender walk into a bar..?

Summary: Desmond and Y/N finally go out together, after Desmond gathers some courage.

“Let me see.”

Summary: Y/N always keeps half her face covered for personal reasons. Desmond finally talks her into letting him see her full face.

Circle of life.

Summary: Desmond loses his wife, and he’s heartbroken, but he’s still eager to meet his son. 

The Time Travel AU

Summary: Desmond and his twin, Y/N, go back in time to meet their grandfather.

Dadmond headcanons. <3

Circle of life, part 2.

Summary: Desmond spending time with his son and granddaughter.

“I thought you were dead.”

Summary: Desmond isn’t... dead. Y/N refuses to believe it- can ya blame her?

Altair:

Sleep. 

Summary: Altair’s daughter can’t sleep, so he climbs into the crib with her- and regrets it soon after. Modern AU

On getting thrown into the future, and breakups.

Summary: Altair and Ezio are Y/N’s ancestors, and she goes through a breakup. Modern AU 

Speeding ticket

Summary: Cop!Altair pulls Y/N over, somehow ends up with a date.

“Have you lost your damn mind!?”

Summary: Altair can’t sleep, and finds himself going to Y/N for some support.

Wingspan

Summary: Altair likes picking on his short girl. ‘Bout it :’)

Fun night out.

Summary: Altair gets drunk. Y/N finds out, real quick, that he’s a total sap when he’s drunk.

“You can sit on my lap, if you want.”

Summary: There’s nowhere to sit at the theater. Altair finds a solution!

Love Story

Summary: Altair’s girls, Phoenix and Raven, ask him once again about how he and their mother met. (Look this is really cute and I’m proud of it???)

“Those are my BABIES.”

Summary: Phoenix and Raven get separated from their father. ALtair then finds out that his girls are little bad asses.

“So what if I have a broken arm, I’m still doing it!”

Summary: Altair breaks his arm. He’s still a little shit, and Y/N might want to break his other arm.

Ezio Auditore da Firenze

Silver Fox

Summary: Ezio’s finally home! Fluff follows. <3

‘Hold my hand, and jump.’

Summary: Ezio is teaching Y/N how to do the leap of faith. Y/N is scared, but he reassures her.

Ezio and Flavia

Summary: literally just dad!Ezio and his lil’ lady. <3

New hair?

Summary: Y/N dyes her hair and wants to know what Ezio thinks.

‘Wanna dance?’

Summary: Carnivale has rolled around! Ezio finds his dancing partner among the crowd.

“Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?”

Summary: Exactly what it sounds like. While waiting on Y/N, Ezio... Ezio decides to be a little shit. 

“Kiss me.”

Summary: Just... Kisses.

Scars.

Summary: Ezio notices Y/N’s self harm scars and he reassures her that he’s there for her, and things can feel better.

Ratonhnhaké:ton/Connor Kenway

Papa Bear!Connah

Summary: Y/N is pregnant, and someone in the city almost makes her fall. Connor gets a little irritated.

Lil’ Charlotte

Summary: Connor finally holds his daughter for the first time after she was born. Straight up FLUFF.

Generic zombie AU.

Summary: Exactly what the title says.

Snowy days.

Summary: Again, just what the title says! Playing in the snow with Connah.

“Please, don’t leave me.”

Summary: Connor��s afraid Y/N will leave. She reassures him that she’s not going anywhere. Little bit of angst, little bit of fluff.

“It could be worse.”

Summary: Connor comes home from a mission hurt. Y/N is there for support.

The one where Y/N cheats.

Summary: Y/N CHEATS ON CONNOR WITH HAYTHAM. THAT’S ALL THAT NEEDS TO BE SAID.

First words

Summary: Lil’ Charlotte speaks her first words! Connah is stoked!

“We’re in the middle of a thunderstorm and you wanna stop and feel the rain?”

Summary: N/A. Title contains errythang.

Love Triangle

Summary: Shay x Reader x Connah. College AU!

“It’s not what it looks like…”

Summary: Connor is just... The best dad, ever. He spends the day with Charlotte and cuteness happens.

Telling TOKW!Connah he’s handsome - GIF imagine

Taking care of a sick!Connah

Summary: As a result of playing in the snow, Connor wakes up sick the next morning. Y/N takes care of him.

Being Connor’s first kiss - GIF imagine

Teen!Connor embarrassing himself to impress Y/N - GIF imagine

College days

Summary: Connor meets Y/N while waiting for a class. College AU!

Papa!Connah headcanons <3

“Just breathe.”

Summary: Connor has a nightmare, but Y/N is there, so things get better quick.

“Let’s adopt twenty cats together and treat them like our children.”

Summary: Y/N wants all the cats. Connor agrees on one now, another later. Introducing: Revolver Kenway.

Edward Kenway:

Goin’ fishing

Summary: Edward teaches Y/N how to fish. 

Making a choice.

Summary: Caroline makes Edward choose between her, and Y/N.

“Hello there.”

Summary: Y/N meets Edward in a coffee shop. 

Terrible Twos

Summary: Modern!AU. Edward spends the day with a terror toddler Haytham.

Just... Cuteness.

Summary: Exactly what you’d think from the title!

“Come over here and make me.”

Summary: Edward being a little shit.

“Did you do that just for me? Aw, come here.”

Summary: Y/N made dinner! Edward loves it.

Late nights and video games

Summary: Y/N and Edward are up late. Y/N decides to play video games.

“I’ll always be here.”

Summary: Trigger warning. Y/N is suicidal and she tells Edward.

“I could outdrink you!”

Summary: Y/N says she can outdrink Edward. Lil’ list of headcanons!

Arno Dorian

On parenting fails, and cute moments.

Summary: Arno is left to take care of the baby. He kind of fails, but he’s trying and that’s what makes it so damn cute.

“Come back.”

Summary: Arno worrying before his lovebug goes away on a mission.

Breakfast

Summary: Arno makes Y/N breakfast.

Insecurities

Summary: Y/N’s insecurities rear their ugly head, and she starts feeling bad about herself. Arno is there for lots of love, and support.

Confessing your feelings to Arno - GIF imagine

“Bring her back.”

Summary: Y/N is on a mission. Arno is talking to himself, about her safe return.

“Let’s just stay here all day. Yeah, that sounds good.”

Summary: Arno and Y/N spend a lazy day together.

Evie Frye

Gift shopping

Summary: Y/N is trying to get a gift for Evie that she’ll like. Jacob tags along to verify if his sister would like it or not. Fluff between Evie and Y/N follows.

Dynamic Duo

Summary: Evie and Y/N are fighting together and things... Things go great.

Jacob Frye (or, ‘THIS MOTHERFUCKER’ and ‘Fuckstick Frye’ as I call him)

On sleepy dads, and not sleepy babies

Summary: Jacob is clueless when left alone with the baby. He figures it out, though!

Jacob with his newborn - Mini ramble

Christmas

Summary: Lame title is lame. Christmas is a week away, and Jacob is being nosy.

“I don’t know if I want to punch him...”

Summary: Y/N shaves off Jacob’s eyebrows because he just... He’s such a pain in the ass. Things end up going great, though!

“You can sit on my lap, if you want.”

Summary: There’s just... Nowhere to sit at the party. Enter stage right, Jacob being cocky.

Knight in shining... Top hat?

Summary: Y/N finds herself in a super sticky situation. Thinking that things are going to end bad, she prepares for it, but doesn't expect Jacob to swoop in to save the day.

Healing

Summary: Y/N gets thrown from the carriage, and as the name implies, Jacob is there to help her get better.

Not so sneaky

Summary: Jacob leaves a trail of hay on the train. Luckily for him, Y/N is there to help clean up!

Diamond Dog

Summary: Y/N’s old dog passes away. She’s understandably upset, and Jacob is there for her.

“I need you.”

Summary: Jacob has a minor anxiety attack. Luckily, Y/N is there to help soothe him.

Ah Tabai

“I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.”

Summary: Just what the title says! Ah Tabai catches Y/N staring at him again, and the two of them have a chat.

Yusuf Tazim

Days of doing nothing.

Summary: Yusuf is done training with Ezio, and he finally gets to spend the day with Y/N.

“Until the end of time.”

Summary: Y/N is feeling down about herself, and Yusuf reassures her that she’s perfect and he cares so much about her.

“Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?”

Summary: The air conditioner has quit working. Yusuf found a quick solution.

Pierre Bellec

On a rooftop in Paris

Summary: Just a relaxed night with Pierre.

“I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.”

Summary: Exactly what the title says! Pierre catches Y/N staring at him... A lot.

Charles Vane

Nights on the beach

Summary: Quiet time with Charles Vane. It’s just him and Y/N. Charles is low-key smooth.

Napoleon Bonaparte

“Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”

Summary: Snow days = snowball fights. Napoleon didn’t expect Y/N to have a damn good aim.

Shaun Hastings

Such an ass.

Summary: Shaun is being an ass and giving Y/N hell for everything.

“I think I’m in love with you.”

Summary: Y/N admits some feelings to Shaun, he thinks she’s joking. She’s not joking.

All the assassins (preferences and such!)

The one where long hair is an issue

Summary: Someone clogged the drain and... Y/N is just pissed.

Birthdays

Summary: It’s Y/N’s birthday, and she gets to spend it with her favorite boys!

Handling depression - Preference

Shay Cormac

Quiet words.

Summary: Shay is spending some time with his wee girl. Lots of whispered words and pride from a happy papa.

On nightmares, and those who help

Summary: A nightmare wakes Shay up in the middle of the night. He’s scared, but Y/N is right there to help him.

When you can’t flirt...

Summary: Self explanatory. Shay can’t flirt to save his life.

First steps.

Summary: Shay and lil’ Abigail. Abbey starts walking, and she takes a little tumble.

Sick on the sea.

Summary: Y/N is sick. Shay teases her a little bit, but ends up taking care of her.

Loss and new life.

Summary: Shay loses his wife while she’s giving birth to their child. He’s destroyed, but realizes a new light has entered his life- his daughter.

Loss and new life, part 2.

Summary: Shay and Abbey go to visit Y/N’s grave. 

“I’m right here.”

Summary: Y/N has an anxiety attack. Luckily, Shay knows just what to do to help her.

“I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.”

Summary: Shay admits something that he hasn’t wanted to tell Y/N. He’s afraid of the outcome.

“You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”

Summary: Y/N faints and Shay just... He’s an ass about it. It’s all in good fun, though!

Being an artist

Summary: Y/N loves drawing on everything. Shay lets her draw on everything. Feelings are admitted.

Misplaced blame.

Summary: Shay had always been a little shit to Y/N. But after Lisbon, he’s beating himself up, and is a changed man. Y/N is there for support, though. Assassin!Shay.

The one where Shay needs some support.

Summary: Shay’s angry after Lisbon- who can blame him? But, Y/N is a sweetheart, and she’s there to help calm him down and keep him from leaving the Brotherhood.

Haytham Kenway

Quiet nights with the Grand Master

Summary: Y/N spends some time with Haytham. Male!Reader

Thomas Hickey

Like a songbird

Summary: Y/N is singing, and Thomas hears her for the first time.